#no notifications on tumblr ha HA at least i hope not

[scoonsalicious]

Unwanted: Chapter 28, Unwanted - Pt. 1

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Fem!Reader

Summary: When your FWB relationship with your best friend Bucky Barnes turns into something more, you couldn’t be happier. That is, however, until a new Avenger sets her sights on your super soldier and he inadvertently breaks your heart. You take on a mission you might not be prepared for to put some distance between the two of you and open yourself up to past traumas. Too bad the only one who can help you heal is the one person you can no longer trust.

Warnings: (For this part only; see Story Masterlist for general Warnings) Language, violence, death

Word Count: 861

Previously On...: You're boyfriend's back and Jade's gonna be in trouble. Hey na, hey na...

A/N: THREE MORE CHAPTERS LEFT OMG HOW DID WE GET HERE?!

NOTE! The tag list is a fickle bitch, so I'm not really going to be dealing with it anymore. If you want to be notified when new story parts drop, please follow @scoonsaliciousupdates

Banner By: The absolutely amazing @mrsbuckybarnes1917!

Thank you to all those who have been reading; if you like what you've read, likes, comments, and reblogs give me life, and I truly appreciate them, and you!

Taglist: (Sadly, tag list is closed; Tumblr will not let me add anyone new. If you want to be notified when I update, please Follow me for Notifications!) @jmeelee @cazellen @mrsbuckybarnes1917 @blackhawkfanatic @buckybarnessimpp @hayjat @capswife @itsteambarnes @marygoddessofmischief @sebastians-love @learisa @lethallyprotected @rabbitrabbit12321 @buckybarnesandmarvel @fanfictiongirl77 @calwitch @fantasyfootballchampion @selella @jackiehollanderr @wintercrows @sashaisready @missvelvetsstuff @angelbabyyy99 @keylimebeag @maybefoxysouls @vicmc624 @j23r23 @wintercrows @crist1216 @cjand10 @pattiemac1@les-sel @dottirose @winterslove1917 @harperkenobi @ivet4 @casey1-2007 @mrsevans90 @steeph-aniie @bean-bean2000 @beanbagbitch @peachiestevie @wintrsoldrluvr @shadowzena43

Tumblr will not let me directly tag the following: @marcswife21 @erelierraceala @jupiter-107 @doublejeon @hiqhkey @unaxv @brookeleclerc

Jade was dragging you through the hallways of the base by your hair as she frantically searched for an exit that would keep her out of Bucky’s reach. At first, you tried to keep track of the path you took, making note of turns and counting doorways as you were pulled down long corridors in case the opportunity to escape presented itself and you had to retrace your steps, but the route was so convoluted, and your head so battered, that you quickly lost track of where you were going, and any sense of direction you’d been able to hold onto. 

“I need eyes,” Jade said, more to herself than to you, and soon she was shifting directions. Within moments, she was throwing open a metal door that appeared to lead to a security center. Tossing you unceremoniously inside, she bolted the door behind her and heaved a heavy breath.

“What’s the matter?” you asked, your tone dangerously mocking. “If he loves you as much as you think he does, you shouldn’t have any reason to run from him.”

“Shut up, shut up, shut up,” Jade chanted. She moved over to the row of security monitors and began quickly cycling through the screens. “Gotta find an exit,” she murmured to herself. “There has to be a way out where he won’t see.”

You took the opportunity her distraction provided to study the rest of the monitors, hoping to find some subtle way to contact Bucky, to let him know where you were or, at the very least, to try and find an escape route of your own. 

“How did he know where to find you?” Jade muttered as she continued to flip through the feeds.

You opted not to answer; you’d be a fucking idiot to reveal your distress bangle now. If you could keep it a secret from Jade, you’d ensure that Bucky would have the ability to find you, no matter where she ended up taking you. It would also let him know you were still alive.

You scanned the rest of the monitors, instead, and were shocked by what you saw: Room after room was littered in corpses; bloody, mangled, bodies where there had once been Hydra agents. Your eyes landed on a monitor in the far left corner of the room, and you saw him. Bucky was covered head to toe in the blood of his enemies, dual guns raised in the air as he opened fire on anyone who stood in his way. Though you couldn’t hear the words coming from his mouth, you could read his lips well enough to know he was screaming your name, searching for you as he tore through the facility, slaughtering every Hydra operative that crossed his path.

You had never seen him so enraged before. Yes, you knew that, as the Winter Soldier, he’d been capable of immense violence– you’d seen video footage of him in action, after all, but this? This was so much worse than that. Because Soldat complied. And Bucky Barnes? He was out for blood.*

You should have been frightened by the blatant display of absolute brutality, should have been repulsed by it. But instead, it excited you. It thrilled you, because you knew that he was doing this for you. To get you back, to keep you safe. He was willing to damn his soul to hell to protect you when you needed him. You should have been disgusted, but you’d never been more turned on by him in your life.

“Gotcha!” Jade exclaimed, drawing your attention back to her. She’d stopped her cycling through the security feeds on a non-descript door that, so far, seemed to have been spared from the ongoing carnage. Moving to a locker beside the desk, Jade reached inside and pulled out a handgun and several clips of ammo, tucking them snuggly into her belt.

“Come on,” she said, reaching out and grabbing your hair once more. “You’re my human shield for getting out of here.” She dragged you back out of the security station and into the hallway, looking both ways before turning left and sprinting down the corridor. It was all you could do to keep up; you had no doubt that if you faltered, she’d drag you across the floor behind her without a second thought. 

In minutes, you were at the door you’d seen in the feed. Jade let go of your hair and trained her gun on your head. “Open it,” she commanded. 

You winced in pain as you yanked on the door with your right hand, the left dangling limply and uselessly at your side. “Hurry up!” Jade shouted at you.

“I’m trying,” you grunted as you pulled. “The door’s fucking heavy, and in case you forgot, I’m down an arm because of you.”

“Jesus Christ,” Jade grumbled, reaching around you to yank the door open, herself. “Do I have to do fucking everything around here?” She jabbed the barrel of her gun into your back. “Go,” she urged.

You stepped into the darkness of the open tunnel and, doing your best not to stumble or jostle your ruined arm, began to walk.

<- Previous Chapter / Next Part ->

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky x you #bucky x reader #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky x female reader #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes fanfiction #james bucky buchanan barnes #james buchanan barnes #mcu bucky barnes #james barnes

[chaotic-tired-cat]

Listen. Listen I need to say this just once and not in the tags of a post.

Okay, so Dungeon Meshi, right?

Nobody spoil it for me (only watching the anime rn) but if Kabru isn't quietly a hyper competent disaster whose home either was destroyed or is actively destroying itself, I will laugh. The competency is only for what he trained, though. Min-maxed his social skill toolbox. He's giving "fish out of water that's just barely adaptable and charming enough to hide it." That's a Shisui from Naruto character archetype. This guy is either fucked up, or abt to be. Delightfully sociable weirdo. Chaotic gremlin hiding under a shell of "no don't worry guys I've got this" that his charisma maintains just long enough for consequences to hit both him, and often teammates. He's an "aww a little guy" who is a bit fucked up, actually, but the issue is probably that he's just not as vibrantly so when you put him next to the main cast.

(I need proof of opinion with a date stamp to shove in a few group chats. No mistakes this time. Posting this publicly, ty for witnessing, feel free to scroll on. Citing predictions through fic is too vague and takes ages, so I apologize for taking up space on your dashboard)

Kabru? Home: gone. Parents: long since dead. Chaos: lurking. Competence: high but not in the common sense category, though few notice at first conversation w him. If he's trained in a covert skill and a bit tortured by some kinda identity related to purpose or childhood, then that's just extra amusing.

Please, universe. Let me be right. It would be so so so funny. He has Shisui from Naruto energy. Make it real for the sake of the bit.

#dungeon meshi #tired cat talks #kabru #learning from my mistakes #a prediction of fourth wing's entire plot line stayed in the chat and woke ppl up with my bullshit prophetic spoilers #not doing that again #no notifications on tumblr ha HA at least i hope not

[budgebuttons]

There's a lot of reasonably frustrated but ultimately misdirected psa-style posting about how viewers NEED to start reblogging things rather than just liking them because that is the primary mode of post circulation on this site. The modern manifestation of this sentiment seems to miss the fact that, if you've been here for ~15 years, were here prior to, during, and after the exodus to the bird app, you already know that likes have always been more common than reblogs, that many people simply don't want to put your art on their blog, and that guilting end-users into using a microblogging site A Specific Way absolutely does not work. If it did, the trend would have shifted a decade ago. Because this conversation really is that old. Regardless, the modern discourse of how difficult it is to be Seen specifically on Tumblr isn't productive because I think it ultimately misses the reason being an artist online feels so Bad, now.

The social media era has funneled Looking At Stuff on the Internet into an economy of engagement that encourages end-users to treat everything we/they see as quick, cheap, and disposable. This is just another fun and flirty way that capitalism devalues art. It's nothing new. Trying to force masses of users to behave in a way that is healthier for the circulation of art isn't going to do anything to solve the discontent we all feel when we hurl something into the void and it is ultimately ignored. I swear up and down: A higher notes number won't feel better, either. Popularity is just as demoralizing as radio silence, but it manifests differently. Instead of 4 likes and maybe 1 reblog from Old Faithful Mutual, you get a horde of people who treat you like a content machine. You keep hoping for an impossibly Bigger Number. The notifs on the first Big Number Post haven't even settled, and people are already asking when the follow-up is coming. You get anons, but most of them are trying to passively convince you to give them More Content.

It's really, really hard to make people care about art. If there was a silver bullet for making the average person appreciate the enormity of human effort behind every beautiful thing they encounter, we would have found it centuries ago.

The best thing creatives can do for their lives online is to be friendly, or at least kind, with other creators. "Big" artists don't form in-groups because they're snobs. They find each other because they casually showed each other support, and their mutual appreciation for that Thing that wound them up in the same tag becomes a foundation for connection, and in many cases, the ever-illusive Bigger Audience as they introduce themselves to each others' circles. We get more eyes on our work by building community with each other.

Where does that leave people who are just here to look at things, not post them? I think the answer is almost identical: COMMENT!! Please, comment! The first step to engaging with art on a more meaningful level is to point out something you particularly enjoy about a given work. It can go in the replies, it can go in the tags, doesn't matter!! If you notice some symbolism or make some connection, there is all likelihood that OP put it there because they desperately wanted somebody to notice it. Let them know why you like it!

Reaching for the nebulous, impossible goal of better post circulation isn't going to make being a creator online in 2023 suck less. Meaningfully connecting with each other can, will, and does. You can make someone's day just by passingly letting them know that their effort is worth more than a number.

#budgetalks #I got to thinking about this because of fanfic actually #the proportion of comments to kudos ESPECIALLY on popular fics bums me out #especially when you open the comments and half of them are people asking for more

[tzuberry]

zerobaseone maknae line as tropes / cliches ૮ • ﻌ - ა

pairing shen quanrui (ricky), kim gyuvin, park gunwook, han yujin + gn reader⠀⠀⠀details fluff, slight angst in ricky’s and gunwook’s, bulletpoint and written

cw getting stood up, mention of lipstick use in ricky’s ⠀⠀⠀wc 738 696 604 802 respectively (2840 in total)⠀⠀⠀reading time 22 min

note title kinda misleading TBH... havent written on tumblr in a while, so this is a new account and my first post! im hoping this doesnt flop :( i loved writing this so much, so if it flops i might just repost it ... idk.. likes and reblogs are appreciated !!! (only if u want to ofc 🤞🏻)

masterlist navigation

ricky 리키

blind date... but you got stood up, and ricky is your best friend

it’s not that you really wanted to go on a date, it’s that your friend assured you this was the perfect guy for you

and your friend swore, cross their heart, that you would not regret letting them set you up

but now you’re sitting at a table alone, with pitiful looks being thrown your way by the restaurant staff and the other groups of people around you and it’s clear to you; you do regret it, and this is the last time you’ll let anyone other than yourself handle your love life

after compulsorily buying a meal for yourself so as to not leave the place empty handed, you slowly chew on your food, wondering where it went wrong

did he see a picture of you and decided that was it? did he hear a story about you that was just unflattering? what was it about you that made them turn around and away from the restaurant—away from you?

in the midst of all this, your phone emits a ding! sound. you’re not doing anything important, so you see it fit to check the notification

ricky 😡🐱: how’s your date going?

terribly. but that’s a little embarrassing to admit, especially to ricky...

yn: good! i’ll text you later

you lay your phone down on the table and pick up your utensils once again to finish your meal, but a shadow casting over your plate interrupts you

“why are you alone, then?”

When you follow the voice (and the shadow), Ricky is standing next to your table, his phone in hand with the screen open on your text thread. He turns it off with a swift click of the power button, and he takes the space on the other side of the table where your date should have been.

You don’t know how to respond. You’re embarrassed; a second ago, you were alone at a restaurant filled with people, and now, your best friend has caught you lying to him about being at said restaurant alone.

“What happened?” Ricky asks as his arm makes its way across the table to your glass of water. He lifts it to his lips, taking a sip and placing it back down. He looks genuinely concerned, maybe even a little pissed, but all you can focus on is how your lipstick stain is on the rim of the cup, and how he drank from that same spot.

You shake your head. “I, um,” you pause, pursing your lips and trying to find a good enough (fake) reason. “Nothing. I didn’t like him, and he said he had other plans, so I just let him go.”

Ricky furrows his eyebrows at that. It’s a very visible sign of incredulity; he doesn’t believe your lie. Nevertheless, he simply shrugs it off. “He doesn’t know what he’s missing.”

“Thanks, I guess,” you reply, still dealing with the aftereffects of being stood up. You poke your fork at the food before you; a lost appetite and an expensive meal don’t mix well.

Ricky leans forward, letting his forearms rest on the surface of the table. He’s looking at you so seriously, analyzing your every move. “Why are you looking at me like that?” you ask, attempting to come off as teasing, but he only waves you off. “I just want to look at you.”

You feel yourself practically melt under his gaze, but you ignore it. This is Ricky, your best friend... nothing more. Right. This is Ricky—you should tell him the truth about why you’re alone.

“He didn’t come,” you admit. “I wasn’t super excited about this date, but I thought– I thought I would at least go on a date. This is... nothing. I was here by myself before you got here.”

There’s a pained glint in his eyes. Is he feeling sorry for you? Maybe you do deserve all the pity you’ve gotten today. He gulps, keeping eye contact with you while biting on a small portion of his bottom lip.

After a while, he sighs. “Come on.”

Ricky begins to stand up, stuffing his phone into his pocket before you hold him back by the wrist. “What?” you question.

“We’ll go do something else,” he says with a bob of his head. Your grasp on his wrist somehow turns into your hands being interlocked. “Let me take you on a date. I’ve always wanted to, and I promise I won’t screw it up.”

gyuvin 규빈

boy next door who you’ve always had feelings for, you just never thought of him liking you back

you’ve always liked kim gyuvin

from the moment his family moved in next to your house, with his bedroom parallel to yours

you could see everything through his window; who he was, what his hobbies were, what he admired, and how he acted with his friends

this all made him seem... unattainable. you felt like you were the audience for a show, and gyuvin was the actor

it didn’t help that you went to the same school, and to further that, he was immensely popular

it was obvious. how could you expect that someone like him wouldn’t be? he’s tall, cute, extroverted, funny and kind—the entire package, if you would say so yourself

you weren’t totally unpopular. you had your fair share of friends, a few social circles that you hung out with. but gyuvin seemed too out of reach for you, even if he was your neighbor

the singular interaction you’ve had was when he came over to ask for sugar. it went like this: “hi!” “hi?” “i was baking, and i kind of ran out of brown sugar. do you maybe... uh...” “oh, sugar? wait, i think i do, hold on.”

it was that awkward. so when your mother told you she became new friends with gyuvin’s mom and wanted to have dinner at their house as a family, you freaked

but it’s not like you can say no, so you found yourself at the kims’ door a few days later

“Hi! You must be [Name]. I’ve seen you around, and I’ve heard about you from Gyuvin, but you’re much prettier up close! I know who you get your looks from,” Mrs Kim says, winking at your mother.

“You’re too kind, your son is very polite, and...”

You tune their conversation out—did she say she’s heard about you from Gyuvin? Why would he be talking about you?

Your mom finishes it (whatever she was talking about) off with, “They’d be perfect together, don’t you think?” Mrs Kim nods vigorously, then pats you twice on the shoulder. “[Name], maybe you would want to go spend some time with Gyuvin first? I’m afraid dinner isn’t ready, there’s still a long way... I’ll call you both down when it is. He’s up in his room.”

You bow, excusing yourself and obligingly treading up the stairs. This is the second time you’re about to interact with him—you better not mess up.

On the final step of the staircase, you start to hear talking from one of the bedrooms. From where you stand, it’s not clear where its origin is, and so you try to listen for the voice. It leads you to a slightly open door, and holy shit—this is Gyuvin’s door.

“They’re coming over today, and, ugh, I don’t know,” he rants. Is that about you? It has to be. Who else is coming over? You move closer to the door frame, nearly peeking your head in. “I just– I don’t know how to talk to them! Last time, I went over to ask if they wanted to hang out and...” he trails off, the regret evident in his tone. “I asked for sugar. To bake.” Oh my god. This is about you.

You take another step, risking the possibility of the door creaking. “I don’t even bake! I came home with sugar and my mom asked why and I just said I found some on the street.” He sighs, exasperated. You inch even closer, toying with the chances of him catching you eavesdropping, when... creak. At the same time, Gyuvin’s rant is cut short. “Gunwook, you have to help me, I can’t be an idiot in front of them–”

His head snaps towards the door, where you are, standing and staring at him like a deer caught in headlights. He quickly hangs up, bidding Gunwook a hushed goodbye through the microphone. “How much of that did you hear?”

You swallow the lump in your throat, flattered and shy at the same time. “I think... all of it.”

Gyuvin’s hand raises to cup his nape, and he gives you the most endearing yet bashful smile. “Would you, maybe, um, wanna hang out sometime? With me, of course...”

gunwook 건욱

friends to lovers, and everyone is sure you both like each other but all you do is deny it

you know gunwook like the back of your hand

although you met a little over a year ago, he quickly became a constant in your life, especially because you saw him everyday at school

he would wait outside your class, eat lunch with you, walk you home (and sometimes to school in the mornings), help you with homework even though he’s always busy with all the extracurriculars he participates in, and additionally schedules weekly study sessions together

this led countless people to think you were dating, even though you’re really not

you deny it, making a gesture with your hands indicating the negative. “we’re just friends, he would never be my boyfriend,” you laugh it off. gunwook tenses up, and the corners of his lips suddenly become downturned. “yeah, we’re just friends...” he agrees, sounding somewhat unsure

that’s what happens every single time someone mistakes you for a couple. you’re the first to refuse that assumption, while gunwook just follows your lead

you thought, “hey, maybe he’s just shy around the topic of dating.” and so you don’t push it, or even ask about what he thinks of the rumors surrounding you two

at this week’s study session, which he scheduled at his house, he can’t focus

repeatedly tapping his pen and running his fingers through his hair—doing anything but his homework, really—he doesn’t even spare you a glance

and so you take the responsibility upon yourself to ask. “is something bothering you?”

Gunwook sighs, looking as if he’s internally debating the pros and cons of unloading his baggage onto you. His eyes dart around his room, from the door, to the desk, to the bed, and finally to you, before he swipes his tongue between his lips and lets out a breath. “Can I ask you something?”

You drop your pen. Why does he seem so conflicted?

Readjusting your position on the bed to face him, you lean closer to Gunwook as you shove your school books and other materials out of the way. “You can ask me anything,” you say, determined to comfort your friend.

He visibly hesitates, biting his bottom lip. He’s still not looking at you, and not so much as a second is allotted for one glimpse. “Do you...” he pauses, trying to muster the courage. “Do you really think of me as just a friend?”

The question almost makes your jaw drop to the floor. What does he mean by that? Sure, you did have a short-lived crush on him when you first got acquainted, but it faded instantaneously. You didn’t know you could be anything more—you thought you had no chance with a guy like him, so your feelings were trivial to you.

Tilting your head, you reply, “I’m not sure what you mean.”

Gunwook shrugs, also following your actions and pushing all his textbooks away. “I guess– oh my god, this sounds stupid, but,” he groans, “I’ve liked you since last year, since before we even became friends. And whenever someone asks if I’m your boyfriend, you just– you immediately say no.”

He... likes you? You’re dumbfounded, eyes wide and mouth actually agape this time. You’re certain your cheeks are red, judging from the heat you feel rush up to your face.

At your silence, he continues. “I know it’s stupid. I didn’t just become friends with you because I like you, it’s more than that, but everytime you say I could never be your boyfriend or something like that, I hate it.

“I’ve liked you for so long, and please answer me,” he sounds breathless as he speaks, “Can I... can we be anything more?”

yujin 유진

first love / teenage crush

you didn’t know when you started liking yujin, you just did

maybe it was when you would watch him play soccer after school, with him alone on the field practicing and you doing your homework on the bleachers

or maybe it was when he bought you a drink that one time. you were thirsty after running to school because you were on the verge of getting an offense on your permanent record if you were late one more time

clicking a few buttons on the vending machine, the solace provided by strawberry milk was nearly yours—until you open your wallet to find that there’s only a thousand won inside

“maybe next time,” you think, “i don’t need to drink anything right now.”

but before you can leave, someone sneaks their two thousand into the slot for you, and the milk drops down into the small metal box below for you to claim

when you turn around, you’re met with yujin

and then a switch flipped. since then, you’ve noticed han yujin wherever you went

you stumbled onto the soccer field on a hot day when you were assigned cleaning duty, and you found that he was the only one there

deciding to repay the favor, after spectating him practicing for a while, you go to buy a drink for him too when you buy your own

you leave it next to his bag with a note, saying: “you’re really good! i bought this for you, make sure to get some rest ♡”

and so watching him practice while doing your homework became a regular occurrence for you, even if you weren’t 100% watching all the time. it was like background music, and your interest in him (caused by him buying you milk) became a full blown crush

Following the steps of your daily routine, you hurriedly arrange your books in your backpack, ready to go see Yujin—the best part of your day—when your teacher stops you at the door.

“[Name], I’d like to talk to you about tutoring someone,” she says, a soft smile plastered on her face as if she wasn’t actively ruining your day. “You’re one of my best students, and a classmate of yours really needs help.”

As hard as you tried to get away, you got stuck in the classroom for the rest of the afternoon, discussing possible tutoring times and the topic outlines where your “classmate” needed further explanation. Not only were you annoyed you missed some time to see Yujin, but when you got to the field, hoping he would still be practicing late into the night, he was gone.

Although you were displeased at the thought of having to tutor your male classmate every day of the school week, you had no choice. In addition, he was at least paying you, so it wasn’t like your hard work was for nothing—just that now, you would have to sacrifice your time with the boy you like.

You started to tutor him after school, and going to see Yujin became a rare possibility. Your tutoring was yielding good results, however, and your tutee received high marks on almost all tests after being taken under your wing.

He runs up to you, showing you his paper with a big red ninety-eight in the corner; he got an even higher grade than you did. “[Name]! Thank you, look at this! I’ve never gotten a grade this high!” You nod, but everything he’s saying is going in one ear and out the other. Since he technically doesn’t need your help anymore, maybe you could go watch Yujin today.

You cancel your session for the day, with permission from your advising teacher. After two and a half weeks, you’re finally back at the field—but this time, he’s the one who isn’t here. You let out a deep breath, deciding to power through and do your homework like normal.

You’re in the middle of trigonometry when a cool sensation is pressed up against your cheek, water beginning to drip down your skin. Flicking your head towards the perpetrator, you discover it to be Yujin holding a strawberry milk for you. He giggles, handing you the small box and sitting down beside you. “Here. I haven’t, um, seen you in a while. Why’s that?”

You take it from him, detaching the straw from the back of the box and poking it through the designated hole. “Yeah,” you say, sipping on the milk for a few seconds after. “I started to tutor Jiwon, so I couldn’t come the last few weeks.”

“Oh, you must be busy, then. Nevermind,” he mutters, shaking his head. “No, what is it? You can’t just say nevermind.” You scoff, a teasing grin making its way onto your face.

Yujin gulps. “Will you, uh... come to my game this weekend?”

#zb1 imagines #zb1 reactions #zb1 scenarios #zb1 oneshots #zb1 #zerobaseone #zb1 yujin #zb1 gunwook #zb1 gyuvin #zb1 ricky #zerobaseone imagines #zb1 x reader #zerobaseone x reader #zb1 fics #zerobaseone oneshots #zerobaseone fics #zb1 drabbles #zerobaseone drabbles #zerobaseone scenarios #han yujin #park gunwook #shen ricky #kim gyuvin #han yujin imagines #ricky imagines #gyuvin imagines #gunwook imagines

[onlyseokmins]

bereal • k.m.g.

Pairing: kim mingyu x fem!reader Genres: smut (minors dni!), established relationship!au, taking pics during sex!au Warnings: reader uses she/her pronouns and is referred to as a girl, consensual pictures during sex that are shared to friends lol, swearing, degradation, objectification (tiny), a lot of oral (m. receiving), rope play (reader is tied up), marking, tiny use of toys, teasing, edging (m. &f. receiving), prolly oral fixation tbh, mentions of fingering (f. receiving), mentions of overstim, me thinking I'm funny again as usual, and like "you better cum fast" kinda thing fjkdsj um pls lmk if i missed smth WC: 2.5k A/N: helloooo I had no idea what BeReal was so this was a bit of an experience 😬 would just like to thank @/princessbetsy123-blog for their patience and understanding, I hope I did well haha also omg tumblr user onlyseokmins is writing non-sub gyu? show-stopping (derogatory) also huge thank you to @a1sh1teruu for the mingyu pic! ❤️ @princessbetsy123-blog asked: can you do any member where his BEREAL goes off during sex and their friends react? The reader has hickies all over her chest and neck and is tied up?

Ding!

⚠️ Time to BeReal. ⚠️

• 2 min left to capture a BeReal and see what your friends are up to! •

"Would you look at that, baby? What perfect timing, d'ya wanna show everyone how pretty you look?"

Your butt rests gingerly against the back of your ankles, wrists bound together behind your back. The soft ropes limiting your arm movements match the ones winding across your body that Mingyu spent over half of the afternoon tying, untying, and tying again with his large-ass fingers until he was satisfied after reading detailed instructions from Minghao.

Finally able to perfect the multi-colored knots and ties that looked absolutely lecherous yet stunning across your naked body, rubbing and squeezing all the right places. It doesn't matter whether you remain still like the obedient slut you are or wriggle and writhe in anticipation of what the man's going to do next to thrillingly torture you, you felt their restriction.

"Yeah, Gyu."

"The prettiest," he murmurs, thumb slipping under the ropes that accentuate your breasts. Your posture is helpfully corrected and uplifts your chest in a flattering manner so he can nip and suck as he likes without you wiggling away.

You mewl at the binds tightening, arching your back as much as you can while he traces patterns connected by the harsh love bites you can feel littered across your skin that he'd left earlier. 

Your body aches pleasantly all over. Having been edged for hours by now, it was well into the evening after a combination of intense, loving foreplay and the still-buzzing vibrator abandoned on the bed sheets from the distracting notification chime of his phone instead. You lean into his tickling touch as it slides up your neck, following more bites that scream "Mine!" all over.

"Mine," he confirms aloud with a whisper. "Will you let me show them how true that fact is?"

"Only… only if you let me cum." 

Your eyes close as he holds your cheek tenderly and aims the phone's camera lens. A sheen of arousal sticks to your thighs and no doubt ruined the ties around them with how much of a mess he's created out of you.

"Of course, love. I'd be an incompetent fool if I didn't and couldn't make such a pretty thing like you cum at least once."

He should've thought of that earlier, is what you want to snark back but you're too desperate to give him any attitude for his blabberings. He would never deny you anything for too long anyways.

Though you take the opportunity to bite lightly on the knuckle of the finger that somehow pushes past your lips, grazing your upper teeth down until right before his nail bed begins, opting to suckle at the tip instead. Swirling it around languidly and sloppily, saliva coating every inch of his finger to soothe the stinging indentation marks you feel out with your tongue.

"Dirty girl."

"Mhm, but I'm your dirty girl."

"Damn right you are."

He knows what you're playing at, what you're trying to prove. The vixen-like gleam behind those fluttering eyelashes as you dare to smirk — releasing his finger with a sickening pop that his cock wishes was it instead.

But he manages to hold back, intent on finishing his own little game before he fucks you stupid so you can't continue to tease him like this.

"One minute left. What position do you think would look best? There are too many to decide from."

Ever the photographer, Mingyu groans because he's utterly turned on (and continues to lose his mind over how good you look) but also due to frustration (again, over how perfect you are from every angle) for you as his muse sources an ever-flowing spring of inspiration. A blessing and a curse.

He's moving back and forth across the mattress, unintentionally jostling your tied-up form with his large body. You dumbly choke out "dick" when he nearly falls into you with the usual Mingyu-clumsiness you know and love. Luckily he possesses the brain cell at the moment to connect the dots between his covered crotch nearly shoved right into your face versus you actually insulting him.

"Baby wants my dick?"

You nod fervently, wishing you could reach your hands out and grab it. Instead, you opt to open your mouth as wide as you've memorized the impressive width of his cock, tongue lolling out as well for the heavy weight of it.

Mingyu full on moans — loudly — at your frenzied eagerness. Watching hungrily as your lower body shifts and your thighs squeeze together, skin straining against the tightened constraints of the rope. Evidence of how much you want him shows all of your body. From your lidded gaze to your puffy, neglected clit he can just imagine prettily between your legs — and it makes his chest swell in pride. 

He's quick to shed his boxers and absolutely cannot resist a little love slap to your cheek with his throbbing, aching dick. Smugly painting your cheek with a shiny smear of precum and tapping your awaiting tongue teasingly, not letting your lips wrap around him. 

Yet.

The timer is set and so is Mingyu's mind.

But yours is as well.

"Damn it, thirty seconds and I can't decide what's best."

You watch in mild irritation at the way he holds his dick with a frown of renewed concentration, bringing it in and out of the frame of his phone lenses. It's like he's teasing you again but this time not on purpose, the leaking head of his cock bobbing closer and then away from you. 

While you normally admire his talents at getting perfect, incredible shots on the first take, the purpose of BeReal was authentic pictures within the randomly selected global, two-minute time slot. Mingyu's pride was always on the line for some reason (probably a stupid bet between the boys). Only one snapshot and never a second late but at this point, all you cared about and wanted was some action. 

You're aware of how turned on he already is, watching the occasional veined palm rubbing against the growing bulge in his boxers. Stroking at it in the same motions as the vibrator he'd teased you with. A new set-up like this excited him (and you), evident by the dark wet stain where the tip of his cock strains against the fabric of his underwear. 

So, when he draws closer again, you lunge forward almost losing your balance but that just works to your advantage as you practically swallow and then choke around his goshdarn dick. Incredibly adept from tons and tons of practice, size training, and testing with his large package pays off, working to your advantage without an insane amount of prep work.

Mingyu lets out a hiss, a crazed look of insanity mixed with lust, affection, and wonder swimming in his narrowed eyes. He runs his hands through the sweaty black bangs strewn across his forehead, meeting your pleading tear-filled gaze with a huff.

"What, does my baby think she can make me cum quick enough?"

You answer him with your actions, rather than wasting words because your mouth is stuffed full of cock anyways. Though it doesn't stop the filthy gags as you take him boldly down the throat, bobbing and nodding your head in what end up looking like successive 'yes' motions, intent on pushing him over that edge. 

"Yeah, just like the pretty whore she is."

And as Mingyu's pretty little whore, you know exactly what makes him tick — or cum, for that matter. 

Stilling your head and swallowing around him several times before you have to back off for air. Not leaving him unattended for too long, you start nuzzling the underside of his cock as you catch your breath. Licking between his balls and mouthing each one with some special attention to make up for the lacking use of your hands. Following the prominent vein that leads all the way up to his swollen tip, collecting salty excesses of precum with a promised swirl of your tongue.

Rinse and repeat.

You make a point to meet his gaze every time his eyes flutter open with the most babygirlism look you can attempt with a cock in your mouth. Not that it's too difficult to achieve with how much you want him to give into you. 

"Desperate little slut, you want me to feed you my cum, don'tcha?"

Despite his words, Mingyu's already shaking after only three smooth rounds of your perfect little mouth routine. Teasing, tiny variations and switch-ups to keep him guessing with that one brain cell that's deteriorating. His resolve, especially when it comes to you, is terribly weak and crumbling by the nanosecond. It doesn't matter how defined his six-pack is as it ripples with each shuddering intake of air he breathes in or those toned arms that twitch, bulging and flexing as he tries not to break the phone in one hand or rip out strands of hair with the other. 

Even his thighs are trembling like a newborn lamb. Oh, how you wish you could place your hands against them but watching the muscles ripple in front of your eyes is rewarding enough. Although, your neglected pussy aches and you can't help but lightly grind against the back of your own shins searching for some semblance of relief.

And when he takes notice of what you're doing, that alone is enough to tip Mingyu over the edge. You know it before he does.

"Gonna… god, gonna give it to you, pretty baby. Fill up that dirty mouth of yours."

The low and guttural moan of pleasure turns into a pathetic whine full of frustration because you completely abandon his cock. Leaning back and away, you watch with thirstful glee at the way it bobs up and down, a shining mess from precum and your spit. 

But little spurts of white pool out of his tip, a painfully slow and almost stilted release because of the sudden departure of your warm mouth. He growls your name and swears when all you do is lick your lips with a smirk like a cat that was asked if it ate the missing canary.

"Revenge," you manage to croak out with a sore throat.

"Revenge, my ass."

Mingyu can't complain all that much given what tortures he'd put you through earlier but that doesn't hide the cute little frowning pout on his handsome face. He has enough wherewithal to re-aim his phone with his thumb poised over the shutter-release button. Predicting what you want as you lean in once more, tongue hanging back out as you bat your eyelashes up at the camera and incidentally — at him.

He can't help but curse you out a bit like you always do at him when the situation was switched. Muttering the filthiest, most derogatory rambles that have the empty walls of your cunt fluttering as he furiously rubs his aching cock with a large hand that barely diminishes either's size.

Finally, the successive ropes of white you've been waiting for spurt out, painting your face and landing on your tongue just as you like it. And you grin salaciously at the click of the lenses capturing the depraved image. Not just of you tied up on your knees, hands behind your back, lips swollen, and pretty face covered in splatters of white but the front camera catches Mingyu — albeit, pretty blurrily — throwing his head back and biting his lip as he cums.

And within seconds of the timer running out, he presses 'post'. Tossing the phone on the bed and pushing you down, the side of your body hits the bouncy mattress at the same time the inanimate object does. Mingyu easily loosens the ties and knots with a surprising amount of vigor despite his harsh panting, a wild look in his eyes. The vibrator that's still buzzing is increased one intensity level and you shudder in anticipation.

"You were saying something about revenge?" he questions with snark, lifting your thigh with his free hand, the toy coming closer to your dripping center — far away enough that it's not even close to touching you and yet you can still feel the powerful vibrations at a distance buzzing through the airwaves. "Where's that cute confidence now? Just opening your legs like the desperate whore you always are, hm?"

He spends the rest of his time working you consistently up to that precipice before dropping you like an elevator without its wires, unable to crash over that peak of pleasure. As if he hadn't done it earlier.

Again and again, with his fingers and that stupid vibrator until his cock has sprung back to life (in reality, isn't too long and yet it feels like forever). And then you're screaming, creaming, squirting, crying, and cumming over and over. Making a complete mess as he pounds your poor weeping pussy until you nearly black out, the both of you ignoring (or not even noticing) the hundreds of notifications lighting up Mingyu's phone.

*the8thwonder used RealMoji, :hao_disgusted:*

cherrycheol: well damn wish i could take back the time i just spent wondering what was keeping him from being the first to post 🤦

> gam3rbo1: u know gyu will do it w/o fail

> joshuahhhhhh: leave it to him to not miss a moment no matter what he's up to 🥴

*tangerineboos used RealMoji, :mingyu_is_loser:*

tangerineboos: can i report them??

> tangerineboos: their account IS private right?

> jeonghangel: why report she's pretty 🥵💦

> jeonghangel: altho i'd prefer NOT to see gyu's nutting face

> jeonghangel: THAT'S reportable 😒

> gam3rbo1: gyu might hit u jeonghan

> jeonghangel: 🤷 im into that

> tangerineboos: 🤢🤕 i'd prefer not to see at all 

> black3y3: i could help u w/that 👍

> black3y3: isn't that how his gf's acct got banned 

> dinostar: yes i reported her bc i thought her acct got hacked

> dinostar: turns out they just wanted to share their porn but forgot they were public 😃

*w00z1 used RealMoji, :jihoon_disapproves_15:*

realtiger: i thought pussies were banned

> junhehe: technically no pussy is seen

> realtiger: 🧐 SORRY i wasn't looking that close 

> tangerineboos: does hoshi even know where or what the pussy is 😂🫵

> realtiger: yeah man there's 1 in wonwoo's moment as usual 🙄💀

> gam3rbo1: pls don't bring matilda into this her fur is too shiny for ur greasiness

> junhehe: 🫰 matilda deserves the world 

> gam3rbo1: dni if ur not a matilda stan or jun ❌

> tangerineboos: yeah geez hoshi if miss tilda is a pussy wouldn't that make you one too 🤡🫵

> gam3rbo1: 🤨 i just said dni

> realtiger: lies and false slander i'm a tiger

> tangeringeboos: 🥊exactly. ur a pussy lolol

> realtiger: brb gonna go fight boo 👊

cherrycheol: ^ they won't be missed

> gam3rbo1: ditto

> joshuahhhhhh: at least seok hasn't posted or my eardrums would be bleeding

> dk21897: ummmmmmmmmmmmmm

> gam3rbo1: ope

> jeonghangel: speak of the devil and he shall appear

> joshuahhhhhh: 😮‍💨 no somehow the pizza he quick ubered just arrived

> dk21897: 😭😭😭😭😭😭 it was late so I had to wait!

> junhehe: isn't bereal supposed to be authentic??????????????????

 > dk21897: why are you judging me when gyu is tying up his gf

 > dk21897: shoot i can't @ her acct

 > dk21897: BLINK TWICE IF U NEED HELP

> joshuahhhhhh: these noise canceling earbuds work wonders 10/10 rec

> jeonghangel: im sure she's just fine 🥴

 > dk21897: TMI

> jeonghangel: 🤷 u asked

By the time the boys have worked out their back-and-forth commentaries, you're laying in Mingyu's arms as he scrolls, occasionally showing you what they've said. Half-asleep, you snort, "Should we thank Hao for the help?"

"I mean we could, but he'll deny it all."

He does, of course, since it's a public announcement — and criticizes how Mingyu had tied the knots from what he can see. But he kindly sends a new resource PDF the next day, a sarcastic warning attached to keep such things private if the two of you don't want to be judged on your technique.

onlyseokmins: March 2023 ©

#ez.creates #kim mingyu smut #mingyu smut #svt smut #svthub #seventeen smut #smut #kpop smut #1k 🌟 #svt.smut

[ms-demeanor]

I appreciate your calm-the-fuck-down post a lot, ngl - from following you, I've seen you have a pretty good handle on understanding what ToS does and doesn't say, and are good at explaining the difference - and I was hoping you could give some insight on whether or not the actually clicking the 'I agree to terms of service' button (note: multi-step process) required to turn off the New! flag makes a difference in the level of data collected - I would expect at the very least it would act as a gateway for whether or not user data is shared with the third party integration, but legalese isn't my field of study.

Agreeing to the ToS to get the little notification thing to turn off would allow tumblr live to share the data that it collects with 3rd party apps and would allow tumblr live to collect location data from your device whether or not you are actively using the app; whether you want to do this is up to you. I do generally recommend having location tracking shut off at a device level, which makes this data collection pretty useless, but I recognize that most people don't have location tracking turned off on their phones.

*HOWEVER*

People are talking about doing this to turn off the New! flag (which IS very annoying) but the most recent post from @changes makes it clear that that is an ongoing bug they are working on; Tumblr has been pretty decent recently about following up on the info they post about on the changes blog and I see no reason to believe that they won't get that bug fixed pretty quickly.

Rather than agree to the ToS I would suggest waiting a few days because I very much doubt that will stick around for long.

And this is not directed at you but I want to use this ask to point to another recent example of tumblr conspiracism: people are seeing the "new" flag as tumblr attempting to force users to agree to the live ToS even as they have offered a longer snooze period and saying that one negates the other - this is being interpreted as malice and a dark pattern and user hostile design.

And I just want to remind people that some time between eight months and a year and a half ago the notifications changed and it was briefly impossible to clear the new flag on the notification button - this is an issue that we've seen tumblr have before with "new" flags after they changed a feature. It's something that people yelled about and sent around guides for blocking the element. It's something that was addressed quickly and was done unintentionally.

I really wish people would stop attributing to malice the bullshit that happens at tumblr that is clearly the result of this website being hilariously broken and held together with hope and chewing gum.

There are ways in which this site is broken that does genuine harm and I'm willing to be cautiously optimistic that the new staff crew is taking steps to fix it (this is about blocked tags; I've been following what various staff members say about this and I have seen small positive steps, staff does seem to be making an effort to unfuck the tags and I can respect that while still being frustrated that it's taking so long). It isn't *good* that the site is held together with chewing gum and hope but it does seem like staff is at least trying to add some popsicle sticks and duct tape to that mix.

The new flag is annoying and I hope they get it fixed quickly and I believe they actually will get it fixed quickly; if you're really bothered by it there's not much harm in accepting the live ToS because the data collected by tumblr live is still pretty minimal compared to most other social media apps, but from a paranoid "fuck all this bullshit" perspective accepting the Live TOS doesn't do much harm at all if you have location data off on your devices (which I think everyone should) and use adblockers (which I think everyone should).

[babiebom]

When You Fall (VIII)

A/N: i got the sweetest message from someone(idk if they’d want me to call them out) and somehow it made me want to start on this chapter so I guess it literally just takes someone being nice for me to actually do something lmao. Also happy new year!! Also also whenever I’m writing one of these chapters and the tumblr notif shows up it jumpscares me. Like how do y’all know?

Tw: depression, reader decides to force themself to be happy, cursing. The usual

Wc:3.0k

Previous Next Masterlist

Sweat dripped from your forehead as you attempted to clear some of the farm from debris. It was taking long to clear everything, and though you knew that most of the land would be unused until you actually got enough money to plant more things and get a coop or barn.

Shadow ran around wildly, barking happily as she snapped her teeth at the air. It’s funny, watching her as she runs. Getting pets didn’t make being in a depressive pit completely go away, but they did make that pit less dark, less daunting and lonely. Mango lazed around on the porch, his tail slowly waving side to side as he watched you.

Sticking your rake into the ground and wiping the sweat again, you grin at your animals, letting out a labored breath. “Okay, so, I love you both very very much. And I’m sorry that I can’t take you but they’re hosting an Egg Festival in the town and I’m going.”

You move to sit on the porch, Shadow dashing to crash onto your lap. You open your arms and let her move her big body onto you with a roll. “And I swear I’m not going to enjoy being away from you both, but I have to go as part of my healing. I’ll be back soon.” Neither one of them did anything other than stare at you and then go about their own business as you get up and head inside to shower. Shadow trails behind you after a moment, her tail wagging so hard her butt wiggles along with it. You take one last glance at her as you finally get in the shower, hoping the day goes by quickly.

Walking into the town’s square, it’s like a decorating bomb went off. There are banners and decorative flags and other things littered around in a way that made you think whoever decorated spent way too long out here only for them to be messed up by the wind. There’s so many layers of tape that you feel irritated for whoever had to fix it.

“Farmer!” Pierre calls out from behind his booth. You want to ignore him, not really ready for social interaction but go over to him anyways. Forcing a smile onto your lips you lean on the booth counter, looking at the things he has stocked.

Some strawberry seeds, lawn flamingos, plants, a painting, a bright pink banner, a plush bunny, and a….decorative pitchfork? What kind of stock is this? What does this have to do with the egg festival? You blink a couple times and attempt to control the look on your face, maybe you could buy a couple of strawberry seeds. Even if you don’t plant them this season you can always wait. “Hey Pierre! Selling some good stuff?”

He smiles and moves his hand around, gesturing to his stock. “Yeah, looking to buy anything?”

“Sure…a couple strawberry seed packets…and that plush bunny.”

“It’s pretty cute huh? Okay that’ll be 2,500g.”

Your breath gets caught in your throat. 2,500g? The man has to be insane! What the fuck costed so much that you were being charged this much? “Yeah, prices are a little steep. But I have to make a living somehow,” he chuckles when he sees your expression. You try hard to keep your face in check, not wanting to snap on the man in front of everyone. You were here to make progress, not to make enemies.

After giving him the money you take your new things and stuff them into your backpack. The letter said the festival ended at two, and looking at your watch it was only 9:30. That meant 4 and a half more hours of agony trying to force yourself out of a depressive pit that you aren’t really all too sure you’re ready to leave just yet for the sake of getting better.

Well, at least there’s food…

Hurrying along, the sight of the buffet table makes your mouth water. Not eating breakfast and working all morning in a large field without totally knowing what to do is a bad idea, but now that you’re looking at all the different types of food you can’t help but praise yourself for how lucky starving yourself got you. Now you can eat, then when you get home you can pass out and sleep until tomorrow. Like another rest day that feels like a reward after running around in the dirt.

As you fill your plate with food, you can see Gus and what’s his name…’Clive?’ You think to yourself, nose scrunching in confusion, ‘No, that's a stupid name. Carl? It has to be Carl…what other C names are there?’ In your thoughts you almost drop your plate and gain the attention of the two men, Gus smiles brightly and waves you over while the other man averts his eyes. Weird…

“Hey Gus!” You smile warmly at the older man. There was a twinge of stress in his eye, but it seemed rude to point that out to him. His eyes moved over the rows and rows of food and it occurs to you that he must have cooked almost everything himself being the Towns Saloon owner and all.

“Hey farmer! I was just telling Clint here…you’ve met Clint right?”

You shake your head at his question. You had only seen him around maybe once and heard his name in passing from the blue haired girl who was talking to him when you passed by and from Maru when you were in the clinic. Thank Yoba Gus said his name or you would’ve been stood awkwardly just like you are but more so because you wouldn’t have known his name. “Oh well, he’s the towns blacksmith…anyways I was just telling him how I hope everyone’s enjoying the food. I’ve been cooking for days to get the food ready.”

“Days? Wow thats a lot of work…”

“Yeah I made fried eggs, boiled eggs, poached eggs, deviled eggs, scrambled eggs, chocolate eggs, you name it!”

“I mean it is the Egg Festival…”

“Yeah, not to mention the other foods. I’d be upset if it turned out horribly.”

You take a bite of whatever was on your plate in front of him, trying to make a show of how good it is, but not really needing to act because WOW can this man cook. How’d he even make this? His eyes light up at your expressions and mannerisms, his shoulders relaxing at the sight of you enjoying the food. “No Gus, I swear this is amazing! You don’t need to worry about anyone not enjoying the food at all!”

“Thank you for the kind words, Farmer, it means a lot to me.”

You nod vigorously, not wanting to ignore him but now overcome with the urge to stuff down as much of the food as you can. What the fuck was in this? Drugs? You can’t even remember the last time you were this hungry.

With your plate you walk around, smiling at anyone who talks to you, and try to carry on conversations that you didn’t really care much about. It had been weeks since you moved here, and you were just now meeting everyone personally. There were so many people living here in Pelican Town that you wonder how you had managed to avoid 60 percent of them whenever you ventured out.

As you make your rounds to the buffet table for the second time, the sight of a bright red cape catches your eye and the man with the eyepatch flashes in your mind. You hadn’t seen him since that day, but you had to find out what those stupid jelly things are.

“Marlon!” You call out, rushing to the man in the corner. He looked surprised that you were speaking to him, but made no moves to walk away or ignore you. Instead he looked slightly pleased. “I’m surprised to see you here.”

His eyebrows quirk up in amusement, “I could say the same about you, don’t hear anything about you going around.”

You shrug and realize that just as much as you stick to your farm, he must stick to the caves and mountains. Neither bad, but awfully lonely when you think about it. You wonder if there’s anyone he lives with up there. “I just thought that you would prefer to be adventuring or something…like in the caves?”

“Yeah, but even with my bad leg I never miss a festival.”

“Oh…say you know down in the caves how there are…things right?”

“Yeah the monsters?”

“Yeah um, have you ever seen the little Jello creatures? They’re really tiny and all but are like really strong for some reason, and jump at you like they’re legless spiders?”

“The slimes? Yeah you have to be careful with them. They might be easy to defeat but can quickly overwhelm you if you’re not careful.”

He frowns at you and you swallow. That’s exactly what had happened. The stupid things were just too much the more you ventured down. But you’d be ready for them next time, and whatever else is down there. “Yeah, they kinda kicked my ass last time I went into the caves.”

He nods solemnly, as if he could relate. Maybe he could relate, having a bad leg and an injured eye and living up there. There had probably been times that he’s gotten overwhelmed and hurt. The thought sends a shiver down your spine. If he could get hurt down there, and you have already been hurt, who’s to say that you won’t just die the next time you go down? It’s weird to think just how lucky you truly were when you were saved.

Thinking of being saved…your eyes flit around quickly trying to spot the man that had saved your life. Maru and Sam had said that Sebastian had gone down into the caves himself to save you, and even though you hadn’t seen him personally since meeting in the Saloon, the need to thank him was always in the back of your mind. And now you have the chance, Yoba you wished you were home.

You bid goodbye to Marlon and shuffled your way to the trio standing off at the bottom of the town’s square. Rehearsing what you’re going to say in your head, you hope that it would be a quick conversation, that you wouldn’t stutter over your words and that you wouldn’t act so awkward that they think you’re weirder than you are. But as you clear your throat as you walk up to them, regret settles in your belly at the looks on their faces. It was like being in school all over again and the kids that you thought were cool were too tight knit as a group and hated outsiders.

Before you could say anything Abigail speaks first, staring straight at you. “Do you think I’m too old to do the Egg Hunt?”

You frown at her in confusion before shaking your head. “No?”

She punches Sebastian’s arm as soon as the word leaves your mouth. “Ha! I told you I wasn’t too old. It’s like, why stop if I’m having fun?”

“How are you having fun searching for eggs with actual children?”

“Hey! Searching for eggs is like going on a treasure hunt! Besides, your sister does it too!”

Sebastian rolls his eyes at her, looking towards the river without saying anything more, choosing to sip on the punch in his cup. Sam looks like he’s suffering and you tilt your head, silently questioning him. “Ugh…it’s my doze…allergies.” His nose is so stuffed up that his words seem heavy. You wince at him and nod in understanding, Springtime wasn’t the best for people with allergies.

Sebastian clears his throat after a minute. “You know what I miss? The rotten egg toss.”

Both Sam and Abigail agree quickly, words coming out both of their mouths too quickly for you to really understand anything they’re saying. They’re very enthusiastic about it, recounting things that happened in previous years. In your confusion you look over at Sebastian, and he swallows his drink quickly. “We used to do a rotten egg toss, a couple years ago. It was only for like two years, Mayor Lewis put an end to it pretty quickly.”

“Yeah, too many people complained that it stunk.” Abigail laughed. It sounded pretty fun, tossing rotten eggs at a target or something, but the smell…ugh.

Before you could say anything else, Sam says he’s going to get more food before the egg hunt starts and they put everything away. Abigail looks between you and Sebastian and smiles. “I’ll go with him, either of you want anything?”

You shake your head, plate still full from the second round. “Maybe some punch? If it’s not too much trouble?” She shrugs and looks at Sebastian who just hands her his cup. She leaves without another word and without turning back. Ha…now it’s awkward…

“I didn’t think you were one for socializing.”

You’re surprised at his words, but think that in a small town there are rarely secrets. Everyone must know that you’re suffering. “Yeah um, just had a bad couple of weeks. I’m better now, though, ready to mingle and become part of the town…being alone is no good.”

He snorts, glancing at you and your heart stutters in your chest. Did he think you were joking? Were you that obvious in your dislike of talking to others? “Yeah sure…been there once.”

You don’t ask him what he means, understanding that he’s seeing right through your fake chipper exterior. For a minute the silence stretches on, but it’s not as tense and awkward as it was before. Maybe it was a good thing he could tell you were faking, there was no need now that it was only you two. “Y’know I’ve been meaning to thank you.”

“For?” He sounds disinterested, but when you look at his face he seems more…uncomfortable.

“You saving me? Your friends told me you went down into the caves to get me.”

“Fucking…yeah. It was no problem. You should be more careful, though, I was only able to help because I noticed that you didn’t come up.”

“Yeah…I really should…anyways. Thanks for saving me, hopefully you won’t have to do it again.”

He shrugs and says nothing.

“I owe you one.”

“Sure.”

The mayor claps his hands loudly, speaking into a megaphone that he’s holding. “If anyone is participating in the egg hunt, gather round. It’s almost time to begin!”

“You participating?” He asks, and for a second you almost say no before remembering that the whole point of coming was to become part of the community and bettering yourself.

“Yeah…you?”

“Nah…”

You nod and cough into your fist, unsure of how to separate yourself from him. “Well, I guess I’ll see you…later?”

“Yeah, sure. I’m either at home, or at Sam’s or the Saloon during the weekends…”

“Okay, cool.”

You walk away quickly, confused as to how you had somewhat made a friend of him? There was that saying that misery loves company…maybe he was the perfect person to be miserable with. He seemed like he had problems himself. Mayor Lewis claps a hand onto your shoulder a little harder than necessary, causing you to wince. “Enjoying yourself, Farmer?”

“Yeah…”

“That’s good! It’s about time you introduced yourself to the townspeople. Everyone was so excited to meet the new farmer in town and you just…disappeared. They thought you were a recluse or something!” He lets out a laugh that makes you frown. You had forgotten how much this guy could talk.

“Yeah well, family deaths will do that to you.” You keep your face straight as you stare at him. He coughs and sputters out some words before the conversation is effectively ended.

After another minute and a half the egg hunt begins and your heart starts thumping in your chest. The kids are already running off, and Abigail is darting around so quickly that you think that she’s going to knock one of them over. Looking at the other participants, the urge to beat them overcomes you. Winning at this means that you’re officially part of the community right? You’re putting yourself out there?

Your feet move without another thought from you and soon enough your basket is full with eggs. Looking at the others it seems theirs are too. You can hear Lewis counting down from ten and your heart races even more. How were you supposed to win this? You run across the square, hoping to get one last egg.

Five…

Where are the rest of the eggs? What the fuck is there no more?

Four…

In the corner of your eye something yellow gleams under the sun. An egg! Near the river!

Three…

You dash towards the egg, hand stretched out towards it.

Two…

A couple more steps to go, you’re unsure if you’ll get there in time.

One…

Your hand closes around the egg and into your basket it goes. Your heart thumps and your breaths come out uneven. But you made it! The last egg.

Lewis calls everyone back towards the center of town, eyes gleaming as he looks at everyone’s baskets. He seems happy to see more people participating in a dying tradition. There were only two kids in town so an egg hunt is bound to get boring as everyone gets older.

It takes five whole minutes for Lewis to count everyone’s eggs, yours being the last basketbhe gets his hands on. “Nine…ten…” Abigail groans in annoyance next to you. “Eleven! The winner is the Farmer! Come up and get your prize!”

Prize? If you knew there was going to be a prize you wouldn’t have tried so hard. Now someone was going to be mad at you for winning instead of them. You walk slowly to Lewis confused as to what he could be offering.

“Enjoy!”

He hands you a straw hat…well at least it’s helpful?

#stardew valley #sdv #stardew #sdv fic #sdv fanfic #stardew fic #stardew fanfic #stardew valley fanfic #stardew valley fic #sdv x reader #sdv x farmer #stardew x farmer #stardew x reader #stardew valley x farmer #stardew valley x reader #sdv sebastian #sdv sebastian x farmer #sdv sebastian x reader #stardew sebastian x farmer #stardew sebastian x reader #stardew sebastian #stardew valley sebastian x farmer #stardew valley sebastian x reader #stardew valley sebastian #sdv abigail #sdv sam #sdv lewis #sdv marlon #sdv gus

[burntheedges]

Passing Notes: Ask

Marcus Pike x gn!reader | 1.2k words | Passing Notes masterlist

summary: You've made a new friend on tumblr.

a/n: happy gift exchange, @katareyoudrilling! I’m really glad we found each other on here and that we’re friends. 🧡 This is sort of inspired by your Marcus-as-your-assigned-FBI-agent fic, sort of inspired by your year of asks… for the @swiftiscruff gift exchange 💕

tags/warnings: flirting, banter, reader walks around their apartment and is otherwise not described

...

You sigh as you drop onto your couch. It’s Friday, finally, and you sink into the cushions with relish. You let the comfort coax you into relaxing and close your eyes, trying to think about anything but the week behind you. 

It helps.

But as soon as you stop thinking about your week, you start thinking about something else. Someone else. In the back of your mind you can feel the excitement building, now that you actually have time to consider it. After just a few moments of rest you’re leaning forward to reach for your laptop. 

He might have sent you a new ask, after all. It’s been three weeks. He has to be back by now. You have to check. 

You feel your heart rate pick up as your laptop whirrs to life and you take another deep breath. It's ok if he didn’t, you tell yourself. He might not be back yet. And you don’t even know him.

But as soon as your tumblr homepage loads you’re grinning, wide. There’s a single notification next to your inbox. 

You click, trying not to hope too hard, but you see the messy paints of his profile picture and let out a delighted laugh. He’s back. 

Hey! Sorry I was MIA, had that work trip. But I did have time to come up with some new questions. :) First, if you had to pick any famous painting to take home from a museum and hang over your couch, which would you pick? I ask because I was thinking about this yesterday when I saw an ad for a new exhibit at the art museum downtown. In the ad they had a Renoir hanging over a bright red couch and it looked so bizarre I couldn’t stop thinking about it and I need your opinion. I hope you’re doing well!

The opening lines make you bite your lip. He was thinking about you on his trip. He came up with questions, just for you, in the three weeks he was away.

Part of you tries to tamp down the excitement – you don’t even know this guy. All you know about him is that his name maybe starts with a P and he’s in his 40s. His profile says just that: “P | he/him | 40s | art nerd” and that’s it. You know that he likes art and stories about art and has amazing taste in art… and he seems to enjoy sending you asks. And answering asks from you. About art, and anything and everything else.

And just before he left on his trip, he started… well. There’s only one word for it. 

Flirting. 

He started flirting, in his asks. And then he even sent you a message, not an ask. The message was about a book you’d just finished, carrying over your discussion from the replies on a post to a private chat for the first time. You grinned like an idiot as you bantered and joked and flirted with him. 

give-me-arts: I can’t believe you didn’t like that book! you: It was slow! Soooo slow. give-me-arts: but that’s what made the payoff so good! you: but what good is it if I have to slog through all of that to get there? I’m too impatient.  give-me-arts: sometimes patience is worth it in the end 😉

But then he broke the bad news — he had to go on a work trip, probably for at least two weeks, and he wouldn’t be able to get online at all. You rolled your eyes at yourself, a bit, for how sad it made you. But whatever. It doesn’t matter now. He’s back! 

You start to type your answer to his ask, but your eyes stray towards your messages. You bite your lip. What could it hurt?

you: Welcome back! Just saw your ask. How was your trip?? give-me-arts: Hey! Way too long. I might have come up with a long list of asks for you in my down time 😉 you: Just for me? I feel special. ha give-me-arts: You are.

Your eyes widen. That is definitely the most direct he’s been so far, with flirting or anything else. What happened on that trip? You take a deep breath and ask about something else, shying away from his reply for the moment.

you: Did you finish the book? give-me-arts: I did! I liked it. I supposedly have the next one in the series waiting for me but I haven’t picked up my mail.  you: Go get it! Read it tonight! give-me-arts: haha ok fine. Let me go grab it. 

You smile and turn back to your draft of your answer to his newest ask. But before you can really get going there’s a knock at your door, just a few minutes later. 

You open it to find Marcus Pike, FBI agent and your (very attractive) neighbor, waiting on the other side. He looks tired and a bit rumpled but he has a light smile on his face, as always. 

“Hey neighbor. Here for your mail?” You invite him in as he nods. 

“Yep. How have you been? Thanks again for grabbing my packages.” You wave a hand at him and shrug. 

“It was no big deal. And I’m fine, nothing new around here. Did your trip go long?” He told you he would be away for at least two weeks, but it was closer to three. He nods.

“The case took a bit longer than we thought. I’m glad to be home.” He sighs, clearly tired from traveling.

You gesture towards the small pile of packages next to the table by your door. “Well, I piled your mail over here–” 

You are rudely interrupted by a notification from your laptop, and you feel your cheeks heat when you realize it was from tumblr. You glance over and see that your screen is angled towards the door and the page is clearly visible. Your eyes dart back to meet Marcus’ but to your surprise, he’s smiling. “Tumblr? I have one, too. It’s great.”

“Really?” Your eyes widen and you tilt your head at him in surprise. “Are you in any fandoms?”

He shrugs, a bit sheepish. “Is liking art a fandom? But you already know how much of an art nerd I am. Comes with the job.” 

You laugh, and nod. “I like tumblr, too. It’s fun.”

Marcus nods and starts gathering his mail into the tote he brought with him, smiling. “Yeah, and I’ve met some cool people on there. It’s nice to just talk to people about art and books and movies, even if I don’t know them in real life. Helps me relax after work.” He straightens, bag full, and smiles at you again. “Thanks again for this. Can I buy you dinner sometime this week? To say thanks?”

You bite your lip. “Sure, Marcus. That would be nice.”

He grins, and it’s as attractive as always. “Great, I’ll text you. But I’ll let you get back to your messages. Have a nice night, neighbor.”As you sit back on the couch after Marcus’ visit, your tumblr messages catch your eye, and yor thoughts turn to P again. How funny, you think, that I have a neighbor who loves art and I seem to attract the same kind of internet friend. You shrug and dismiss the thought before reopening your draft. You need to respond to P’s ask.

#PPCUGiftExchange2024 #marcus pike x reader #marcus pike x gn!reader #marcus pike x you #marcus pike fanfiction #marcus pike fic #x reader #bte friendship exchange

[mooseonahunt]

HAPPY NEW YEAR

This piece is dedicated to everyone I’ve had the pleasure of meeting this year through the Resident Evil fandom.

Just like everyone else, long message is beneath the cut.

Thank you to everyone who’s supported me and my works this year. I truly could not have made it this far without my followers, mutuals, and my friends. I didn’t have anything planned for NYE, but I threw this together real quick so I could get my thanks out.

The Resident Evil fandom has not always treated me or my friends kindly, but the good people I’ve met outweigh the bad ones. Even though I’ve only known a few of my current friends for a couple months, it’s felt like a lot longer and I certainly do hope to continue knowing these friends for years to come. Falling into the RE hell pit and carving out a safe space with people I cherish and adore has been quite the experience, and I’m glad I didn’t have to spend a single second in this fandom alone.

Thank you especially to @hamartia-grander for introducing me to RE with your RE4R posts. Laying my eyes on Luis and watching an RE4R playthrough to get to know more about him was one of the best decisions I’ve ever made in my life. It’s led me to friends like @wisecrackingeric-2, @theprestigegirly, and @ugetelynx. I can’t imagine my life without any of you in it, and, quite frankly, I don’t want to imagine it. In the short amount of time that I’ve known you all, you’ve all become like family to me. And @bag-0f-b0nes, I know you weren’t into RE for very long, but thank you for joining me on Tumblr even when I stopped posting about DBH and kinda sorta abandoned my IG page. Your support has been invaluable to me.

Of course, thank you to my mutuals as well! I may not talk to all of you, but it’s always a pleasure seeing you on the dash. You’re all fantastic individuals and I hope this new year brings you all great things.

Last but not least, thank you to my followers. You’ve had to put up with so much of my rambling and nonsensical posts as well as spam reblogs that have led to a couple Asks wondering if I’m okay. Some of you have been constants in my notifications and I’ve come to recognise you. Those of you that I recognise, it’s been a joy seeing you interacting with me and my friends this past year. Thank you so much, truly, for your support and your kindness.

Happy New Year to everyone. I hope 2024 brings you all wonderful memories.

#serennedy #serrennedy #luis serra #luis serra navarro #leon kennedy #leon s kennedy #ashley graham #ada wong #Luis Babygirl Serra #moose draws #moose draws re #moose draws resident evil #moose posting

[zoeysdamn]

Bloodied petals - Xavier Thorpe x reader | Part.4

Summary: You remember memories of your childhood with Xavier, hoping to get some courage from it to talk things out with him. Wednesday starts to suspect something, and Principal Weems isn't happy with either of you.

Warnings: angst, mention of blood, underage drinking, swearing. IMPORTANT: the last part of the taglist had made my tumblr bug so hard so it didn't work, I'm sorry for those who hadn't received a notification while being tagged. If the problem continues for further parts, I'll consider deleting the taglist bc fuck I just lost 40 minutes re-editing this chapter 3 times before finally achieving to post it

[Masterlist] [Part.1] [Part.2] [Part.3]

Xavier had been your first kiss. You doubted he remembered it but you definitely did. When your aunt had dropped you at the Thorpe manor for the first time, you were just turning 6 and had that funny haircut that almost hid your eyes. Your aunt Cordelia wasn’t so fond of this hairstyle, but things had been hard for you since your mom’s passing less than six months ago; taking care of the birdnest you were calling hair could wait for the situation to settle down. 

Aunt Cordelia had explained to you that you were going to live with a dear friend of hers for some time because she couldn’t take you with her to an upcoming witch congress on the other side of the world. Couldn’t or wouldn’t you didn’t know, to you the only thing that mattered was that you were going to a foreign place, and your mom wasn’t here anymore to comfort you. 

“You’ll be fine here,” had assured your aunt while your luggage was taken out of a car by the butler. 

“Can’t I come with you?” you had asked again with a wobbling lip and watery eyes. 

“You know you can’t pumpkin,” said Aunt Cordelia. “Mr.Thorpe has a son about your age, I’m sure you’ll become friends very fast.” 

And just like that, she left, and you found yourself alone in a manor you didn’t know. 

Mr.Thorpe had been intimidating but the good thing was he hadn’t more time for you than your aunt did, and as soon he introduced himself to you he left too. So you had fled to your new room and hidden in the closet to cry. You didn’t want to be here, you didn’t even want to be raised by Aunt Cordelia ; you wanted your mom, but that was impossible now. 

Then, you had heard the creak of the closet’s door being opened and you had timidly peaked up from behind your hand. A little boy was crouching down to your level, looking at you curiously with his big hazel eyes. 

“Why are you sad?” he had asked with his childish voice. 

Taken aback by his question, you had wiped the tears on your cheeks, “I’m not sad, I’m just lonely.” 

He had looked at you curiously; then he had raised his little hand to brush away the hair that was obstructing your face. The gesture had made you flinch a bit, but he was gentle and somehow, you had felt like you could trust this boy. He had beamed, exposing the gap left by a missing tooth. 

“You have pretty eyes!” he had exclaimed. 

“Thanks?” you had said unsure, still sniffling. 

He nodded vigorously, his smile plastered on his chubby face. Then he extended his hand to you. “Wanna get out of here? I know where the cookies are hidden, we can search for them together, it’ll be fun!” 

This brought a small smile to your face for the first time in weeks, and you had taken his hand. Within the next few days, you had your hair cut. That’s how you met Xavier Thorpe. 

From there, your friendship bloomed. Aunt Cordelia tried to spend at least six months a year with you, and you lived at her house for that time. Well, she tried, and sometimes you found yourself dropped by the Thorpe manor more than intended. This didn’t bother you, you enjoyed Xavier’s company, and you were best friends after all. And considering his own father was also absent frequently, he loved when you were there. When you turned 12, your aunt brought you along on her trips to make a sort of pilgrimage around all the important sites of witchcraft around the world. According to her, it was time for you to learn more about your history and soak up their energy. The trip was so long, you didn’t see Xavier for two whole years. And when you came back to the Thorpe manor at 14, the both of you had changed a lot. Gone was the little boy with scraped knees and round cheeks, the teenager you met at the door was lanky and definitely taller than you now. 

“Hey,” he had greeted you with a lopsided grin. The twinkle in his eyes though hadn’t changed the slightest. 

“Hi,” you had smiled back. “You’ve let your hair grow,” you noticed. 

“You lost the braces,” he counter-attacked, not losing his smile for a second. 

He opened his arms and you didn’t lose a breath before diving into the hug. Oh, you had missed him. You had thought that everything would be like usual, but since puberty, you definitely noticed that things had indeed changed between you two. Your aunt asked a little more about Xavier when you went home, and you didn’t look at him the same way. He was more…attractive somehow; you loved the long hair. The same week you came back, the two of you went to a party with some of his friends from the normie school he went to. This wasn’t the first time any of you had alcohol, but it definitely was the first time you got drunk. A silly game was suggested and in your already advanced tipsy state, you and Xavier had thought this would be fun. You remembered vaguely the rules being to spin a bottle and then kiss someone or drink to avoid it, or something. To be honest most of your memories of that night were kind of blurry ; but when the bottle had pointed in your direction and your eyes had met Xavier’s, you distinctly remember your heart missing a beat. Maybe you had thought about protesting or something, maybe your mind had been too cloudy to properly ponder whether or not you should do this. It didn’t matter, because the next thing you knew then, Xavier had leaned to you and had pressed his lips against yours. That’s how you got your first kiss, by kissing your best friend during a drinking game. 

The next day the hangover had been so hard, Xavier didn’t remember half of the previous evening, not even your kiss. But you definitely did. Over the years you had forced yourself to push it down, thinking it was only a silly teenagers game and that you shouldn’t get too excited about this. 

Thinking about this now, you thought that you had been in love with Xavier for far longer than you imagined. You should have seen it coming, and yet here you were, with flowers slowly growing in your lungs because of your feelings. 

You were wandering in Jericho as the other Nevermore students were dispatched in different areas for Outreach day. Principal Weems had reminded you that everyone’s presence was requested for the inauguration ceremony at the end of the day – that yes, even you miss L/N are to attend this. Then she had let you free for the remainder of the day, and you were glad she did. You had a few things to buy at Jericho, this could be the occasion. But while you were making your purchases you were starting to realize that you were only postponing the moment when you’ll eventually have to talk with Xavier. 

He had left the Nightshades’ crypt quite upset, it pained you even more to know that he was mad at you. You needed to fix this and fast. So you ended up pushing the Weathervane’s doors  open, eyes searching for familiar hazel hair. Enid had texted you where Xavier had the displeasure of working that day and reading the coffee shop's name had made you wince. Hopefully, Tyler won't be working today. 

“Hey L/N,” you heard from the counter and you cursed internally. Turning to the counter, you narrowed your eyes at the curly-haired boy. 

“Galpin,” you greeted him half-heartedly as you came closer. Ever since what he and his friends had done to Xavier on last year’s Outreach day, you despised him. 

“Do you, uh, want to order something?” he asked. 

God, the way he acted all innocent and kind made you want to punch him in the face. On any other day you probably would have, but right now you were just drained. 

“Sure,” you finally let out, “I’ll have a large cappuccino with two shots of espresso, please.”

“Coming right up,” he said before starting to make your order, and you find a seat next to the window. 

For a moment, you put your face in your hands like it would give you some peace for a while. Everything had escalated so quickly, you didn’t even know if there was going to be an actual end to all of this. 

The sound of a mug being dropped in front of you on the table made you look up, and the sight of Xavier surprised you. 

“Tyler mentioned that you had ordered something,” he explained to your surprised expression. 

Glancing to the boy awkwardly standing behind the counter, who tried to look like he was busy and not looking at the two of you, you gave him the slightest nod of the head as a thanks. Xavier sat on the opposite bench, arms plopped on the table nervously. 

“Look I–”

“There’s something–” you both started at the same time. It made you chuckle nervously, “Go on,” you pressed him gently. 

He passed a hand through his hair nervously, “I- I’m sorry I’ve been such a dick yesterday, okay?”. The guilt in his eyes was evident and you were relieved to hear that he had calmed down. “I shouldn’t have called you a liar.”

“No, that’s on me,” you muttered, playing with the still untouched mug. “I’m…not feeling well these days,” you finally admitted. 

Xavier’s eyebrows knitted together in worry. To his knowledge, you never had any serious health issues. The flu once in a while maybe, but nothing that sounded that bad. He leaned closer to you over the table, a serious look on his face. 

“What’s going on?” he asked in a hushed, yet gentle voice. 

Suddenly, all the courage you had built up vanished. You had been so confident that you were going to tell Xavier everything, that this was the only way of making things right. You felt like you owed him that, after all, he had everything to do with your condition. 

But as you were about to expose the truth to him…something stopped you. 

The feeling of a warm hand on your trembling ones made you snap back to reality. Xavier’s face was fully painted in worry now. 

“You okay?” he asked. “You zoned out for a second.” 

You nodded slowly, gulping. No need to lie to yourself, you knew exactly what was stopping you from telling Xavier everything. The fear of losing him. Deep down you were afraid that if you told him about the Hanahaki disease, and what – who – caused it, he would end up leaving you. And you were far more afraid of losing Xavier than you were of coughing flowers. Because without Xavier, you feared that you'd end up alone again. And you never wanted to ever feel like that again. 

Licking your lips, you wondered what you should say to him. So you lied again. 

“I’m ill,” you blurted out. “I got sick around a week ago, that’s why I’ve been so distant lately.”

Technically, you weren’t really lying to him. It had been more than a week since the first symptoms, but the rest was true. You simply choose…not to disclose everything. 

“Shit,” he swore under his breath, “are you feeling okay? What is it?”

“I’m fine,” you squeezed his hand in reassurance, “I had no idea of what it was until recently so…”

“Is this serious?” he inquired again. 

Flashes of the pages mentioning the inevitable death of patients appeared in your mind. 

“No,” you finally let out. “I’ll get better at some point I’m sure. Bought a few things to make a potion to ease the symptoms.” 

Xavier glanced at your bag and nodded. Whether or not he believed you, he didn’t press the matter further. 

“I should have been honest with you sooner, it’s just…it had been a couple of rough weeks,” you said with a weak smile. 

He nodded in understanding, still you could see he was still worried about you. “Yeah, I get it…between that, Wednesday's arrival and the whole monster thing it had been a little bit crazy, right?”

You slightly frowned at him. It wasn’t it, he was misreading the situation completely! As you were about to say something, you suddenly became very aware of faint whispers around you. So did Xavier apparently because the two of you whipped your heads around at the same time. Glancing behind your shoulder you noticed a group of normies teenagers throwing glances at you, whispering and giggling among themselves. Some of their words reached your ears.

“...think…’re together?...”

“maybe…freaks…from Neverm…”

“...kinda cute…couple…”

You felt your face burn. Not in shame, but for the first time in the possibility of what it implied. Many people had mistaken Xavier and you as a couple before, but it was the first time you truly felt flustered by the idea of it. 

Then Xavier pulled his hand off of yours and the sudden loss of contact made your heart drop. He sank into his seat further, putting more distance between the two of you. Eyes flickering to him in disbelief, you only met his sorry expression. 

“I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable,” he muttered while casting his eyes away. 

You wanted to protest, to say that it didn’t make you uncomfortable at all, but words were stuck in your throat. As were petals. 

“I should probably go back to work,” said Xavier while getting up. “But I’ll finish in an hour, if you want to wait?”

“Sure,” you mumbled. 

Tears started to burn behind your eyes. This wasn’t how it was supposed to go at all. The light ring of the doorbell made both of your heads turn to Wednesday who had just arrived. Her sole presence, usually not unwelcomed, was dreadful to you and you felt like you were becoming lightheaded. The burning inside your chest bloomed and the whole coffee shop felt suffocating. Raising from your seat abruptly you gathered your bag and vest without a word. 

“Where are you doing?” asked Xavier lightly touching your shoulder. 

“I’m- I’m not feeling well,” you excused yourself, which made Wednesday raise her eyebrow as she came to your side. “I need some air.” Feeling Xavier’s worried eyes on your back you squeezed the hand on your shoulder. “We’ll talk about this later, okay?” you whispered to him. 

He seemed to hesitate, but between your pleading eyes and the intense bored expression on Wednesday’s face, he finally conceded. 

“Okay,” he said softly. “I’ll see you later.”

You smiled weakly at him before rushing to the exit, head low. Walking rapidly through the streets you hurried until you found an empty alley which you immediately rushed into before throwing up in a garbage can. The flowers and blood mixed together regurgitated from your sore throat, as quickly as they had appeared within your chest. Tears flooded down your cheeks as the last petals left your mouth. Coughing fits were getting more and more unpredictable. You choked on your own breath, mouth tasting bitter and throat ablaze. If you didn’t do something real quick, you were going to die. But for now, you just felt so, so tired. Weems and the inaugural ceremony be damned, you were going back to Nevermore to sleep your problems away. Then, you’ll take it from here. 

In the end, returning to the school to sleep and avoid facing your problems gave you more problems. A few hours later you were standing in Principal Weems’ office alongside Wednesday, getting a lecture about setting Crackstone’s statue on fire. 

“For the hundredth time, I didn’t set fire to that statue!” you pleaded to the principal. 

“And what evidence of your innocence do you have, miss L/N?” snapped Weems back. “Should you have attended the ceremony like you were supposed to, we wouldn’t have this conversation.” 

“I attended this ridiculous ceremony,” noted Wednesday out loud, “yet you’re suspecting me too.” 

She shot a deadly glare at your impassable roommate, “And I have every reason to miss Addams. The two of you had good motives to set this statue on fire, and miss L/N had mysteriously disappeared just before the ceremony.” 

“I wasn’t feeling well that’s all,” you tried to defend yourself. “Do you really think I’d brand myself a witch in front of all of Jericho? Those people hate my guts, I don’t want to have anything to do with their shitty town!” 

Weem’s hand hit her desk with force, “Mind your language, young lady!”

Wednesday only rolled her eyes at the whole ordeal. You on the other hand, were pretty sure she had something to do with it – but unlike you she had a solid alibi. And surprisingly, she stepped in your defense. 

“Y/N is right about not feeling well these days,” she interjected, making both Weems’ head and yours snap to her. “She sometimes coughs in her sleep, this is very unpleasant.”

Principal Weems narrowed her eyes at you, “Is that true, miss L/N? Have you fallen ill?”

You nodded slowly, “Just small flu. Must’ve caught a cold during the Poe cup.” 

The principal looked pointedly at the two of you, breathing hard through her nostril. Then she threw an accusatory finger at your pair.

“I want,” she articulated slowly, “the two of you out of my office. Now. And I don’t want to ever hear about you either.” 

None of you needed to be asked twice. Once in the corridors and far enough from Weems’ office, you turned to Wednesday. 

“Thank you for having my back with Weems,” you said quietly, “you didn’t have to do that.”

“No I didn’t,” she repeated. “I was right, you do cough at night and it is unpleasant.” 

That made you frown slightly. None of your roommates shouldn’t have been able to hear you, you still casted the silencing spell every night. 

“Since when?” 

“About a week,” she said, while narrowing her eyes. 

You started to think hard. It had been far more than a week since you had started to cast the spell. This was basic magic, a simple but efficient spell that you had been practising for years. There was no reason for you to fail it. The only logical explanation…was that your magic was weakening. The natural reaction for your mind would be to list every reason for it not to be possible, but then you thought about the sudden stop of your spell during the Poe cup, which had made your boat stop dead in its tracks; and so it added up. The disease had not only damaged your body, but it had also consequences on your powers. This was definitely concerning. 

“You are indeed sick, aren’t you?” asked Wednesday. At the surprised look on your face, she quickly added, “Don’t think I care, I’m just readjusting your position on my suspects' list by considering all the parameters.”

You scoffed in disbelief “I’m on your suspect list? No shit, Wednesday?”

“It is perfectly plausible,” she said plainly. “With your powers and knowledge in potions, you have the ability to increase your strength I suspect, and you know the school’s grounds by heart,” you heard her listing, “you’ve spent more time alone than usual for the past weeks, with no one to testify of your presence elsewhere than on the crime scenes, and when I started to suspect Xavier you immediately fled to his defence without proof, like you knew for sure he couldn’t be the monster. So tell me Y/N,” she continued while looking at you dead in the eye, “why couldn’t you be the killer?” 

Struck by her question you could only blink in disbelief. What. the. hell? 

“Excuse me what?” you articulated after long seconds of silence. 

“You should be honored,” she said flatly, “it requires some skills to be added to a potential suspect list.” 

“I don’t want to be on a fucking suspect list,” you spat, “you’re delusional Wednesday.” 

“My observations and suppositions are rarely wrong, I’m not the one burying herself in denial.”

Stepping closer to her you gritted your teeth together. “I can’t be the monster, I literally can’t.” 

“What proof do you have of that?” she retorted. 

Fuming, you tried to not play her game. But staying calm in front of her insolent lay back behavior was starting to be incredibly harder. “Drop it,” you spat. 

“You’re just proving me right.”

That’s when you lost it, “I CAN’T BECAUSE I’M FUCKING DYING OKAY?” you roared at her. 

For a moment, nothing but echoes of your words resonated within the corridor’s walls. Your ragged breaths contrasted with Wednesday’s neutral expression, unfazed by your scream. Only after a few seconds of a mortifying silence did you realize what you just did because you had lost your nerves. Shutting your eyes tightly you internally prayed that no one around heard you. 

“I don’t think you’re lying,” simply said Wednesday. 

You let out a scoff, “I’m not, trust me. I’m sick, and my health is deteriorating every day. If you don’t want to believe me that’s fine but leave me the fuck out of your stupid list.” 

She raised an unimpressed eyebrow at you, “Until you’re blessed with black plague, I doubt you’ll die because of whatever sickness you have.”

“God, can you stop being that infuriating for once?” you snapped bitterly. “I’ve done every possible research on the subject and I know I’m doomed, okay?” 

A silence took place between the two of you. You whipped away tears that had gathered at the corner of your eyes. It was the first time you had admitted it out loud ; it hurt more than you thought. 

“I’m sorry to hear about your condition,” said Wednesday quietly ; and now matter how surprised you were by her words, you still thanked her quietly. “Does a cure exist?”

“Not that I’m aware of,” you muttered. “It…healing doesn’t depend on me.” At her frown, you lightly shrugged. “Flowers are growing in my lungs because of unrequited romantic feelings,” you explained quietly. “Eventually, I’ll either die from internal bleeding or choking.” 

This time, it was her turn to scoff, “You’re plagued with a deadly disease because you have feelings for someone? You just gave me the final proof that feelings are indeed useless, thank you.”

“I don’t fucking need your sarcasm,” you seethed, “if you want to be a stone-cold bitch that’s on you, but no need to mock me for having actual feelings. I didn’t choose this.” 

She looked at you closely, like she was trying to figure out something. Which she apparently did rather quickly: “It’s Xavier, isn’t it? He’s the one you have…feelings for.” 

You turned your face away, licking your lips. Wednesday was really the last person you wanted to have this conservation with. 

“You’re getting weak and you’re losing your powers because you have feelings for a meaningless man,” she repeated. “I thought you were better than that.”

“Fuck off Wednesday,” you cried, finally reaching your breaking point. “I’m not asking to understand, I’m not even asking you to be compassionate but shit, for once in your life be respectful of someone’s privacy.”

With that, you turned away and rushed into the corridors. You didn’t want to hate Wednesday, she had done nothing to you ; even regarding Xavier’s feelings, you were confident that her arrival hadn’t triggered your condition. Maybe it had accelerated it, but sooner or later Xavier would have fallen in love with someone else, and you would have been doomed anyway. So yeah, you didn’t want to hate Wednesday Addams ; but she definitely didn’t make things easy. 

A little less than an hour later, you found yourself walking through the school’s woods. The heated discussion with Wednesday had strangely given you enough courage to go and find Xavier, and finally explain everything to him. Weakened by your feelings? My ass! you thought. You were going to tell what was going on with you to Xavier, and to hell with the consequences on your friendship. 

You soon reached his artist shed in the middle of the woods. Its reassuring aura made you a little more at ease than the very public space of the Weathervane. Knocking on the door, you waited for Xavier to answer you. When he opened the door, you let out a loud gasp at the wound on his neck. 

“Holy shit, what happened to you?” you asked while pushing him back inside immediately before coming in. You immediately went to take a look at his bleeding jaw, carefully tilting his chin to the side. 

“Just an accident with a painting, nothing too bad,” he tried to reassure you. 

“Nothing bad? Xavier, you have claw marks bleeding on your neck, this isn’t some small scratch!” 

You could see that he was trying to brush it away, but you forced him to sit on a stool while you inspected the extent of his injuries. It didn’t look so bad, you could probably do something about it. Carefully dragging your fingers on the outlines of the claw marks you whispered a healing spell. The bleeding gradually stopped, and the cells of the skin started to slowly repair themselves. Though it started here, and the marks were still here looking like fresh scars. You gritted your teeth in frustration. With the full extent of your powers, you could have probably healed him completely. 

“That should do,” you muttered with a small smile. 

“Thanks,” he smiled back. “So,” he said after a few seconds of silence, “guess we need to talk, uh?” 

“Yeah,” you chuckled awkwardly, “guess we do.”

You fidgeted with your sleeve, toying with words in your mind. It was always more difficult to launch a subject when the time had come. 

“I’m not doing well,” you said, trying to resume the discussion where it had been left out back at the Weathervane, “and I’m not sure if I can really get better…on my own.”

Xavier leaned forward, fully focused on the matter. “How can I help you?”

You almost wanted to cry. He wanted so much to help you while having no idea of how bad the situation was. 

“This is…kind of complicated to talk about,” you hesitated. But to your surprise, Xavier gently took your hand into one of his bigger ones. 

“Hey,” he called softly, “you know you can tell me anything, right?” 

After a slight hesitation, you nodded slowly. Yet words didn’t seem to come out of your mouth. You started to open your mouth to finally confess, but something caught your eye. A large canvas hung on an easel, all in black and white tones. Like pulled by the invisible force of curiosity you slowly approached it, your hand slipping away from Xavier’s. As you approached and noticed who was painted you felt your heart sink into your chest. The painted figure of Wednesday playing her cello was taunting you, and it painfully reminded you of that night in Xavier’s room, when he had started to sketch it. It reminded you that you had no chance. 

Xavier called out for you from behind. But when you turned back to him, he was met with the look of your teary eyes. 

“You see, that’s why I can’t tell you,” you whispered sadly, “I can’t spoil this from you.” 

“What are you talking about?” he frowned. 

“This,” you said, gesturing at the portrait, “I can’t ruin your happiness with my burden, Xav.”

“Y/N please,” he said getting up, “please tell me what’s going on.” 

You shook your head, defeated. “I can’t,” you whispered weakly. “Sorry I- I got to go.” 

Before Xavier could react you slipped away and rushed outside of the shed. Tears were running down your cheeks but you couldn’t care less. It was clear that you could never interfere in Xavier’s feelings for Wednesday, so why bother saying anything to him at all? You heard him call you as soon as you had crossed the door but you didn’t dare to turn back and face him. He managed to grab your wrist when you were barely a few meters away from the shed. 

“Please don’t shut me out,” he begged you. You still couldn’t face him on your own, so he gently tucked on your hand, turning you to him. “Please Y/N, tell me what’s going on with you, ‘cause I can guess on my own.” 

Hesitantly, you looked up at him. Even though your eyes were blurry because of tears, you couldn’t help yourself but lose yourself in the admiration of his face. His brown eyes, so deep and full of compassion, his sharp features framed by soft hazel eyes…you wanted to print this image in your mind for however long you had still to live. Just like that night in his room, your eyes flickered to his lips. This time you didn’t hesitate, and you leaned forward and pressed your lips against his. 

He flinched slightly, for the first second. But then he surprised himself thinking how soft your lips felt against his own. 

You stayed like this for long seconds. Keeping your eyes closed and savouring the moment, you then realized that Xavier wasn’t moving at all. Biting back the bitter feeling within your guts, you slowly parted from him. Xavier simply stood up there frozen in place ; not understanding why you had kissed him so suddenly. At his lack of reaction and dumbfounded expression, you wanted to cry again so badly. Instead, you looked up at him.  

“I wanted to do that at least once,” you whispered. No matter how you had tried to keep them at bay, tears were flooding down your cheeks now. 

Still stuck down in place, Xavier didn’t know what to say. But the face of his best friend, teared apart by pain and sadness, was already too much to handle for him. 

“I- I’m sorry Y/N,” he muttered, “I don’t…I like you, I truly do but…but not like this.” 

Through your tears, you tried to smile ; it was a pathetic attempt. “Yeah…I know,” you whispered weakly.

It would have been easier if you had the ability to vanish away on the spot. It would have made you avoid moving away from Xavier and returning to the school painfully slowly, each of your steps burdened by the weight of your broken heart and the knowledge that Xavier hadn’t even tried to stop you. It would also have saved you from running into Wednesday once again, and hearing her asking Xavier out for the ball in the distance. It would have. 

But you couldn’t vanish, instead, you were here shedding every tear you had along bloodied flowers, not even trying to stop either of them. 

You just had your heart shattered into a million pieces and the confirmation that there was no hope for you. You were doomed, and the flowers growing inside of your lungs would soon reach your body’s breaking point.

[Part.5] 

A/N:  Thanks everyone for your incredible support, I hope you enjoyed this part ♥

Hope you’re all doing okay, take care of you ♥

Taglist: 

(no need to ask at every chapter, you're added once, and you're added for the whole fic :D)

@apocalypticnovaa ; @libdarkheart ; @ameliabs-world ; @certifeidlovergirl ; @aeisnoa ; @cat-loves-music ; @coolchick333 ; @eringaitskill  ; @sweaterxav ; @sssleepless ;

@l4venderia ; @persipeoni ; @coldheartedmar ; @chaosfrisur ; @littlebabyk  ; @pinksirensong ; @nushy ; @raribella ; @igotanidea ; @ali-r3n ;

@cafeaueva ; @queenofshinigamis ; @xxhospital-for-soulsxx ; @imtherealslimmoony ; @one-oblivious-nerd ; @amphitritesangels ; @valckenaux ; @aliciahlewis ; @lilsunshine1092 ; @ell0ra-br3kk3r ;

@hershey2813 ; @ahmya-4 ; @katkoosik ; @maggie-da-rat ; @hopelessnessforthehopeful ; @mk-the-great ; @neenieweenie ; @steviesbergthuis  ; @rayliz793 ; @poison-ivy-737  ;

@katiemrty  ; @vanillaarr ;  @corpsebridenightamare ; @ghswlz ; @siriusblacksl0ver ; @poppyalice2001 ; @mypsychoticlove ; @jointherebellion215 ; @siriwhitewolf​ ; @miinnttyy​ ;

@teaganthemorningstar ; @oblivion-void ; @fandomstoryreader25 ; @darkdaydreamer ; @engenelxver ; @maddiechapman15 ; @hannahnikohl ; @pajerita19 ; @i-like-trains ; @tinafuentes ;

@slngarza ; @lqveharrington ; @honethatty12 ; @users09 ; @honestlyka ;

Usernames not found by Tumblr and notified by DM:

@flowersownme @eileen201804 @peacheskiwi @spiceyhotsherbet @ramiiroll @theweirdone2468 @tempressofthetarot @bambi-munson @apollo3475 @engenelxver @2000bitf @hes-club

Plz tell me if I’ve forgotten you in the taglist (or if you wanna join!)

#xavier thorpe x you #xavier x reader #xavier x you #xavier thorpe x reader #xavier thorpe #xavier thrope imagine #xavier thorpe angst #wednesday netflix #wednesday series #wednesday #wednesday addams #reader insert #hanahaki disease #no beta we die like men

[peachdues]

This shit is annoying asfk.You have all ur followers sitting here waiting on netherwood and all u keep doing is pushing back,I get you have a life and all but if u really don’t have time for it to be done then tell us that instead of doing things like “going to try to have it done this weekend”or the week after that.i understand u may have a life and things outside tumblr but u can’t blame people when u literally created a mini fic that people are waiting for,if u knew there was going to be multiple parts you should have saved them in ur drafts and then published them once they were all finished instead of leading us on with mini little parts that u post of things in the story..

And instead of trying to start new fics..maybe finish the ones people are waiting on?Like why are u posting ur written fics about other characters and starting on new fics when people are sitting here with their notifications on for netherwood because u said it may be dropping soon.

If u don’t have motivation to finish something,then don’t lead people on with ur little mini spoilers.

You know, I went through a range of emotions while reading this. Annoyance. Upset. Anger. I thought of a plethora of replies that ranged from whiny to downright hostile.

And then it clicked.

You’re not a follower of mine and you’re not someone who enjoys my writing.

You don’t want me to finish Netherwood at all.

You want me to quit and leave tumblr.

That has to be it — because any true supporter of mine wouldn’t send this shit. Any true supporter or friend I’ve made on here would know and understand that I have a life and beyond that, that the writing process is not linear. There are fics I have teased since July that are still WIPs — why? Because writing takes time. I don’t write things from start to finish (so your insipid little suggestion to ‘save in drafts and post in installments’ is as useless as you are).

My followers — my friends, mutuals or not — know this and respect this. They have been so supportive of me since I first debuted on here. They were here cheering me on while I studied for and took the Bar exam. They celebrated my becoming an attorney. They ask about my writing and my personal life because they are sweet and kind and successful in every way you aren’t, you miserable quim.

Your lack of reading comprehension makes me question the school system in whatever country is unfortunate enough to bear your existence. Because I’ve never said I’d lost motivation to finish Netherwood (no matter how much it is clear you hope I do). It is my top priority among any of my works; that I work on other fics has no bearing on that and is frankly none of your pathetic concern. I have never asked anyone to turn on their notifs — turn them off and fuck off if it bothers you so much. No one is forcing you to be here.

As much as it’s clear you want me to give up and leave, I’m afraid I’ll have to disappoint you once more — I’m not going anywhere. I will finish Netherwood on my time and on my terms and if that means you lose interest, then so fucking be it. It’s not for you, anyways. If you had a modicum of creativity, you’d understand that, but your brain, much like your life, is so devoid of any true substance that I feel sorry for you. You pathetic, miserable little speck of wasted dirt.

On behalf of writers everywhere that have to deal with this shit, and as disrespectfully as possible, fuck off, you wart. 🤍🤍🤍

And next time, at least put your name on your ask so I know who to block 🤍 at least you can’t send this bullshit on anon anymore. Now you have the freedom to say it with your whole chest 🤍

PS — you’re likely lonely and single and ugly as sin, and your ask is precisely the reason why 😘

#and have a new year as miserable as you #writing #fic writing #writers on tumblr #🍑’s asks #demon slayer #kimetsu no yaiba #sanemi shinazugawa #kny x reader #kny #kny fanfic #kny sanemi #sanemi x reader

[the-badger-mole]

Any steambaby headcanons?

I don't spend a ton of time thinking about Katara and Zuko's kids, but actually do have a run down of the 5 kids I see them having (the last two were unexpected and twins), and one or two other posts about their dynamics. Unfortunately, since I wrote it at least 2 years ago, and Tumblr would rather waste their time trying to look like Twitter instead of fixing their archive feature, I can't find it. I won't be able to recreate it exactly, and I don't really want to try. If someone happens to stumble on any of my steambaby headcanon posts, please, puh-lease interact so they'll show up in my notifs, and I can try to aggregate them. I don't think there's more than 4 of those posts.

I will, however give you a fresh headcanon, hot from the oven of my mind. It's not specifically about the steambaby in question, but I hope you enjoy it anyway.

Everyone thought that Zuko would be the one who was afraid of becoming a parent- and he did have a few pretty good freakouts- but what caught everyone off guard was Katara being afraid of parenthood. Half-way through her pregnancy, she began having these intense dreams of her mother, and how well Kya took care of her, and worse, how well she would've taken care of her had she not died, and Katara became certain that she wouldn't be able to live up to that. She doesn't tell any one. They've all been telling her for years at this point what a naturally mothering person she is- and not always as a compliment- and she knows she wouldn't be able to take them "paying lip service". So, her insecurities fester until one day, towards the end of her pregnancy, Zuko finds her sobbing in their bathroom. He freaks out, but then pulls it together, because his wife is in need of some serious bucking up. He finally gets her to tell him what's been bothering her, but instead of laughing off her fears and assuring her that she's going to be the best mother in the world, he sits with her and tells her he completely understands why she's afraid. Then he tells her just what she told him- that they were going to make mistakes, lots of mistakes as parents, but that ultimately, they already loved this child and that was all that mattered in the end. Then he goes on to remind her what a terrific job she did with Aang, Toph and Sokka, and that despite everything they went through, they were remarkably well adjusted, mostly due to her efforts. Everything isn't 100% okay after that, but Katara calms down enough to leave the bathroom. She still has her insecurities about motherhood, but she's now even more sure that she made the right choice of a father for her kids.

#atla #zutara #steambabies #headcanon #THE YEAR OF CONTENT!!!!

[tarysande]

On Grief. And On Friendship. On Memory. And Love.

When my grandmother died, we didn't have a traditional funeral. We didn't wear black. We didn't sit around, solemn and silent. We told stories. We ate food she would have liked and drank Bailey's with cream. We got to do it together, of course, and we got to cry and hug and mourn and laugh and sing.

I'm sure all of us have heard some version of the phrase "online friendships aren't REAL friendships." I know I have. I've never understood it, either. For me, in all my neurodiverse glory, online friendships are often MORE REAL. Where else can you meet people and immediately jump into all the things you have in common? All the shared loves and hates and hyperfixations? Where else can you just bypass small-talk and, as Anne of Green Gables would say, find bosom friends so quickly? I've met so many online.

I honestly don't remember when I met Sara/@dearophelia. When I look through my tags, I know it's been at least seven years. I'm certain it's been longer because she definitely had username changes. And I am total shit at remembering username changes. More than once, I've told myself I should keep a spreadsheet. I'm pretty sure I've known her almost as long as I've been on tumblr, and that's more than a decade.

When Sara got sick, I finally used that tumblr function that notifies you whenever a blog updates. I wasn't around tumblr as regularly, but I didn't want to miss anything Sara might say. I hoped that one day I'd get the notification that everything was clear, she was in remission.

I didn't. Today, I got what will be the final notification from her blog--@vhenadahls sharing the information that Sara passed away. That there wouldn't be anymore updates. No more reblogs. No more snarky comments in the tags or gushing comments in the tags.

If this were a room and everyone who loved Sara, who enjoyed her fanfic (with or without knowing the woman behind it!), who has listened to her playlists, who played ME3 multiplayer with her, who was in any way touched by her in a way that brought their lives joy, it would be so full. We would all have stories to share. We'd all have memories to relive.

This room would be decorated with labradorite and pink and fat birbs and cats. There would be so much music--Taylor Swift and Halsey and Florence and the Machine and Hozier and so many many others. There would be a million fabulous selfies on the walls of Sara's huge smile and her vulnerability and her bravery. There would be gaming knickknacks and D&D dice and tarot decks and crystals and magic and books on every surface. All her faves would be represented. And it would still only brush the surface of how vibrant she was and how deeply and enthusiastically she loved what she loved.

If this were a room where we could also add all the characters she created, whose stories so many of us loved ... well, it would have to be awfully big. Sara wrote a lot of stories for a lot of fandoms.

And if this were a room where we and her characters were gathered, but we opened the doors for all the characters and stories that Sara helped inspire, helped grow, encouraged and enabled, well, I know a whole lot of my characters and stories would be here, too. I'm sure I decided to create Rose Trevelyan because of some conversation Sara and I had where I was imagining Rose Vakarian-Shepard grown up.

Sara, I'm really sorry I didn't get to finish the Vakarian-Shepard stories before you left. Most writers write for themselves, sure, but often they also write for specific readers. Sara was always one of mine, but I don't think she knew it. I lived for her gushing tag-comments. I loved when she was always so quick to jump in with prompts.

I'm honored that I was someone with whom Sara shared her original fic work. (She also once shared an absolutely horrifying scene with Garrus and Shepard's clones that she cut from Nora's story because it was just TOO AWFUL. In fact, she shared it with me BECAUSE IT WAS SO AWFUL and she knew I'd appreciate it.) In my heart of hearts, I wanted Sara to finish that original story and publish it. I wanted us to be part of each other's group of writer-friends (you know, you always see them thanking each other in their books). Hell, I wanted to have a small press at some point just SO I could publish Sara's stories. I believed in her THAT MUCH.

I love Sara's stories. I love her playlists. I love her blog, with its hodgepodge of interests and loves. I love her imagination and creativity and attention to detail. I love that I can still visit that mind by reading the bounty of work she left behind.

I mean, she made me wholeheartedly buy into a relationship between Shepard's mom and ZAEED.

Sara was one of the constants in my online life over the last decade. Even if we hadn't chatted for a while, I always knew we could pick up again like no time had passed (thanks, ADHD). As I write this, there's a little chat circle on the bottom right of my tumblr screen with her avatar in it and I can't bear the thought of hitting that X button and never seeing it pop up again.

Sara struggled and loved and fought and overcame and breathed and was brave. Not just in the past few years, when she was sick. As long as I knew her. And she didn't let anything stop her. She snarled in the face of it all and wrote stories so beautiful they broke my heart and then pieced it back together again in the same paragraph.

I miss her. I will always miss her. But I'm so happy I got to know her as long as I did. She'll live on in my memories, in my stories, in the characters she helped inspire. She'll live on every time I look at my favorite tarot deck--she was the first person I yelled at when I bought it--and when I see fat birbs and cute-maybe-evil cats. And if that's not REAL friendship, real love, I don't know what is.

#dearophelia #death tw #cancer tw #on memory #on grief #on mourning #long text post #tara talks personal stuff

[wooflesnoot]

Gamers, please give everyone *AT LEAST* an hour or two before you post spoilers. (Even with adding the Spoiler tag, people will get notifications if they have notifications on for your posts.) And for anyone on tumblr, Twitter, and Youtube; make sure to block main notifications if you're unable to watch the episode as soon as it comes out. I've been doing this ever since i waited for TOH episodes, just sticking on the website i used with no social media notifications on to stop the risk of getting whacked with spoilers. I know people who've been spoiled immediately after like, the first hour of the new TOH episode.

Hope everyone has a great viewing! Be aware that everyone has a different timezone, and may be too busy to watch the episode immediately.

#murder drones