#oh my god im fucking up so many words . gang im not pretending here i drank like 2 shots tops and its Fucking me somehow

[l-cereta]

oh my god u know the hrt is working when u get genuinely white girl drunk

#ive never been this drunk before this is crazy. the gender euphoria of not having any tolerance despite being able to drink 4 drinks a year #ago #like its that or someone Did something to this drink but it was from a housemate's stash. oh my god i wanted more of this im so glad im in #bed rn i could have made so many bad decisions #im like this close to posting one of the thirst(?) pics i took on my sideblog that i havent touched in a month #oh my god im fucking up so many words . gang im not pretending here i drank like 2 shots tops and its Fucking me somehow #WAIT I CAN EDIT TAGS #typos fixed :sunglasses: #genuinely crazy how much im feeling it tho ive literally Never felt it this much. id ask if ibuprofen or spiro interact w alcohol but i #think there was a decent amount of time between when i took both #yeah like i took spiro ~10:57 and then uh drank after. 11 hm ok this isnt as spaced out as i expected #i dont think im going to alcohol jail tho. im being responsible im In Bed im not gonna go do anything stupid (altho i do. want to ask #someone downstairs to do something stupid. but maybe thats the alcohol talking) #also shileas is downstairs and shes a bitch and i dont want to be cringy in front of her #i dont know if shes trans or just a really masc lesbian btw . shes cool but she also has some bad takes sometimes and i dont think she #likes me #im writng so many tags <3 but thats what love is. if anyones read this far idk like the post or something #you know the one post where the person puts an egg in their mouth. and then people share the tags. this is that #i was gonna be typing this out on a discord server but i thought no. this deserves to have everyone see it #man also if i went down and asked like if anyone wants to fuck like who would say yes . shileas is a super senior maeve is in a relationshi #p #i dont like riley and . man idk about griffin. but i think im a lesbian. maybe im just desperate. #bUT IM NOT GONNA. im not gonna. #i dont want to sleep tho i want to have fun :(( but my roommate is asleep #& its not like anyones gonna fuck me on this bed . with like my lovies (thats what i call my stuffed animals) and shit . #i genuinely didnt expect that i could get this drunk and whats crazy is i know i could be more drunk #can u imagine if someone reads this and goes 'well shes clearly sober and faking it' no </3 im simply very eloquent i was neglected as #a child so i read alot lol #whoops *a lot not alot #wasnt there a limit of like 26 tags. when do i hit that

[gaias-space]

Steve And Eddie Headcannon

(Steddie! Ship, NSFW!18+, Mention of oral, Drug use, fluff, smut, mentions of PTSD and mental health, In this scenario Eddie never died he just has Spicy trauma)

Compliments

It’s the little compliments like this that sparked their Romance. Eddie was so nervous to even say that to Steve. Steve played it cool, like it was nothing. But he was up all night thinking about it. He enjoyed compliments like anyone would, but why did it make him so flustered and excited knowing eddie was the one who said it? It could have been anyone.

“So your like…in a band huh? That’s pretty badass if you ask me…. Maybe I can watch you play sometime or whatever”. Steve said admiring the corroded coffin shirt Eddie wore. “Maybe I’ll write you a song one day Steve” he winks the two always shared small compliments that became for frequent before they became a couple and these compliments were Cherished always

They share the most compliments in the bedroom. “Shit your beautiful Harrington” Eddie’s face was red as he eyes shirtless steve. “Mmm my big boy” eddie mumbles as he holds steves cock in his hand. Drool falling out Eddie’s lips. Or Steve crying out so many words as he is on the cusp of cumming “you feel so good…shit your so beautiful Ed’s . I-oh fuck your a god”. “Your my beautiful boy look at you completely coming undone just from my hand. Oh sweet boy” eddie cooes.

Physical attraction

It’s the damn smile. Steve can’t take his eyes off that damn cute smile of Eddie’s. He loves the cheeky attitude and overly confident comments Eddie makes. They always tease flirt with each-other and it’s always Eddie teasing Steve making him all flustered and unable to speak properly. He pretends to hate it but secretly he never ants Eddie to stop.

One night Steve had a nightmare about Eddie while crashing at his trailer. “Eddie …I don’t mean to wake you I just guess I uh…had a bad dream something happened to you. And I wanted to make sure you were alright” Steve was so nervous he was rubbing the back of his neck but Eddie just chuckled and said “oh dreaming about me were we big boy? Im flattered” it’s those cheesy comments Steve loved. “I’m right here in the flesh safe and sound….did you want to stay here tonight?” He tapped the empty side of his bed. And you know Steve didn’t say no.

Eddie stepped out of the shower, towel drying his long curly hair and only a towel wrapped around his waist. Steve couldn’t look away at the V line and snail trail up his torso, the way he effortlessly dried his hair all relaxed like that. Beads of water trickling Lower and lower until it absorbed in the towel. His eyes wandered admiring every tattoo, every scar, and his beautiful muscles. Eddie was absolutely beautiful he could not look away. “ Like what ya see Harrington?” Steve blushed and looked away “shit” he mumbled under his breath. It was so cute how embarrassed Steve got.

Steve’s hair is Eddie’s weak spot it’s always so perfect and Eddie definitely would make comments about how much he envied the hair. Eddie never really tamed his hair but staying at Steve’s he found all these hair products. He so quickly got used to using them he started to smell like Steve. And he wasn’t complaining 😉

Loving you

“For your modesty dude”. Eddie sure as hell thought about Steve’s gorgeous body that whole week. And he absolutely worshiped it. Every “sleepover” they had Steve would wake up in either his denim vest or in Eddie’s hellfire shirt. And every now and again the gang would notice little things like Steve wearing a chain or ring of Eddie’s, and one day Eddie completely forgot he was wearing Steve’s yellow sweater or smelt like Steve’s cologne

Eddie couldn’t keep his act up for long he loved Steve and his body. The way he would lick his torso and his soft eyes would look at Steve in awe “your so god damn perfect Harrington” it wasn’t the love making that made Steve’s cheeks bright red, but when Robin wasn’t thinking and loudly mentioned the bright hickey left on his neck the next day. He wasn’t ashamed to be dating Eddie Steve was just a submissive shy little bitch.

There were moments of appreciation when Steve brought Eddie clothes on the trip to the store with the rest of the group. “Look man I’m embarrassed enough but please, I haven’t showered in days and your the only guy my age. Please…get whatever you have” the urgency and vulnerability in Eddie’s voice as he pulled Steve close to him to whisper. Steve couldn’t say no. And when he threw the bag of clothes and cologne to him swiftly to avoid the rest questioning it they shared a look of deep appreciation. “God I love you Henderson” he thought

When Steve was away Eddie cuddled His pillow Steve slept in, inhaling his scent and never letting go. Being alone scared Eddie after everything he went through with the town and vecna. “Oh god I miss you”he cries out squeezing the pillow tighter until he fell asleep.

Steve was just as emotional when he wasn’t with Eddie. He sleeps in Eddie’s shirts and every item he gets from Eddie rings, mixtapes, and shirts he would never take off. He felt braver and more confident always carrying a piece of Eddie with him

Comfort in you <3

Eddie leaned into Steve, he felt his warmth behind him and all the tension that day eased. He had Steve, he could do anything. He just wanted to melt into his arms then and there. They were going into a battle and he was scared. When he felt Steve behind him he completely melted inside. How he wished Steve knew how he felt then

Theres nights where eddie gets overwhelmed flashbacks fill his mind and he can’t sleep. But Steve was always there to remind him and reassure him he is okay. “Hey Eddie baby I’m right here” Steve reassures holding his wrists gently and rubbing soothing circles along his wrist and hand. “Your not what your thoughts say. I know your afraid your becoming your father but trust me. Your not living up to that Munson name your so afraid of.” Eddie cries and falls into Steves chest. “You are so amazing Ed’s, look at you! Nobody can say they’ve done half the amount of great things you’ve done. Like fighting demobats to save Hawkins, roll two! Not one- TWO natural 20’s in one game, and look…you have so many friends who love you…god Ed’s I love you”. He kisses his forehead.“And ya know what?” He pulls eddie close to him lifting his chin to look into his eyes. “Wh-what Steve?” “Your a bad ass dungeon master the best out there. You inspire me everyday”. I love you Stevie boy”.

Some days eddie and Steve will just lay on the couch, Eddie smoking a blunt, Steves head nuzzled into Eddie’s chest while they play a slasher film or softly play Music they felt safe in eachothers arms and they wouldn’t want it any other way. Just them two together. Steve will play with Eddie’s curls gently twirling them in his fingers, tracing his tattoos and inhaling his scent. And Eddie would hold Steve in his arms gently stroking his cheek until Steve fell asleep drooling on him. Eddie couldn’t get over how cute Steve was “what are you doing to me Harrington” he whispers smiling at the sleeping boy on him

One day eddie gave Steve a mixtape he made filled with all his Favourite songs that month Steve appreciated it so much he was a stuttering mess “think of me will ya?” Eddie says with a smirk. And Steve did. He played the mixtape learning all the new bands Eddie loved and when he wasn’t with him he’d repeat the songs over and over imagining Eddie was beside him <3

#eddie munson #eddie cult #steddie #headcannons #steve harrington #Steve #stranger things

[hongjoongslut]

Title: Mortal Chaos

after being banished from Mount Olympus, you are forced to wreak havoc on mortals. every man that has stepped into your life, they’ve fallen to your knees and did what you asked at will. no mortal man has ever given you trouble or attitude at your requests, except for one. Yoo Kihyun.

pairing: goddess!reader (Até, goddess of mischief, delusion, ruin, and blind folly, rash action and reckless impulse) x mortal!mafialeader!Kihyun

rating: 18+

Word Count: 2.4k

warnings: greekmythology!au, tatted!kihyun, nonidol!kihyun, reader is such a bitch but thats how she was made, mafia themes, sarcasm, so much sarcasm, mentions of readers and kihyun’s past victims, reader and kihyun have a physical fight but it doesn’t last long.

NSFW warnings: dom!kihyun, brat!reader, unprotected sex (this goddess has superpowers to not get pregnant lol, always wear protection), pull out method, oral (f receiving), kihyun is a cocky little shit in bed, slight degradation from both parties but no harsh names

BTW reader's thoughts are in italics :)

Enjoy!!

being a goddess should be beautiful, right? it’s not everything it sounds like. you just so happen to be one of the few goddesses that are feared instead of loved. you’ve made men do unspeakable things countless times, they just fall to your knees and bend at your will. for years you fooled gods until Zeus had enough of your antics. he banished you to Earth. now you’re stuck with pathetic mortals, but at least you can still wreak havoc here.

you can’t exactly be in your goddess form without notice, so you pretend to be some sort of rebel among the others. you’re going to your usual club where sorry, pathetic men roam freely, unknowingly that you’re about to ruin their lives. “these mortal songs aren’t too bad.” you thought to yourself, searching for your prey. you see a few men that are far from sober and you almost pity them, almost. no one has really sparked your interest, so you go on the dance floor. “might as well act as a mortal since i’m here.” your outfit is sure to spark men at a club, how could they not fall in love with fishnets hugging your thighs oh so deliciously.

so far you’ve been looking for random men to practice on, while you wait for your target to show up. Yoo Kihyun. you’ve been in this town for a while, and everybody you meet tells you to stay away from him and his gang, Monsta X. there’s wanted posters almost everywhere you go. you thought the members would be nice to mess with, but once you figured out who the leader was, your heart was set. he was definitely a handsome man, even a blind person could see so. his men are attractive as well, you’re sure so many women fall to their feet.

you’re dancing in a crowd of people who smell of sweat and alcohol. “almost smells like sex.” of course you’ve been bumped into, but someone is getting a little to close for your liking. you push it off until someone grabs your hips and tries to make you grind on them. you turn to find some wasted dude, smirking. “back the fuck off bitch, you don’t want to mess with me.” he laughs “i can’t resist you baby…” he slurs. you scoff, shoving him away. you turn to dance again but he grabs your wrist. “feisty, i love it sweetheart.” you’ve had it. you turn and sock him directly in the nose. “don’t fucking touch me. go to hell.” he stumbles, blood beginning to pour from his now crooked nose. “you bitch…i’m gonna kill you!” he tries to run to you, but he is stopped by a tatted arm. “get the fuck out of my club before i deal with you myself.” the man turns to face Yoo Kihyun, his eyes immediately widened. the drunk runs away from the situation, leaving you and Kihyun standing there.

“im so sorry about that ma’am. you did break his nose, i’m impressed. i’ve never seen a woman do that.” he scoffs, now facing you. “can i get you anything on the house for dealing with such an asshole?” you smile. “No thanks, but is there any first aid kit in here? My hand really hurts..” you rub your perfectly fine hand. “i’ve got you kihyun.” he nods. “follow me. don’t worry, we’ll get that hand looked at.” you walk behind him, studying his features. “he really is handsome. i’m gonna have so much fun with him.” he brings you to his office, guiding you to a chair. “i’m sure you may have just bruised or maybe even broke it. you socked the hell out of him.” he laughs again. “you’d be perfect for the mafia. i’m sure you’ve heard this town is filled with gangs left and right.” he turns to you and examines your hand. “wow, i don’t see any cuts or bruises. it doesn’t feel broken or anything, you’re a strong woman.” he looks at you smirking. “thank you, what’s your name?” he rolls his eyes, scoffing.

“have you not been in town for long? everybody here knows my name. I’m Yoo Kihyun, I run this club.” he offers his hand, you reach out to shake it. “ahh, well nice to meet you Kihyun, i’m y/n.” he smiles. “what a beautiful name, it suits such a badass woman like you.” you start to admire his office. “he has good taste in decor and aesthetic.” you walk around, analyzing his office. “this office is gorgeous, who are all these people?” you point to a picture of him and Monsta X. he walks to you, seeing what picture you’re pointing at. “ahh, those are my closest friends. they work for me here at this club.” you can feel the music blaring through the floor. “you know, i actually recognize these men. i think they’re in some sort of gang.. why would you be friends with such horrible people?” you start to back away, pretending to be scared.

“so you did know who i was all along. i’m not that dumb sweetheart.” he looks at you, then walks to his door and locks it. “so, who do you work for and why are you here? i suggest you tell me willingly or we’ll have to get it out another way.” you back away from him, your butt hitting his desk. “i-i don’t work for anyone! i just came here because my boyfriend just left me and my friends suggested i come here to forget about that asshole… please don’t hurt me!” you really should become an actor, he’s completely fooled. “i’m so sorry about that y/n.. i can make him disappear you know. just say the word and it will be like he never existed.” you smiled, looking down to his feet. his finger comes to your chin, lifting your face. “you’re really beautiful darling. he’s missing out on such a kickass woman. tell me, since you’ve definitely heard of my gang, what do you think of me?” you don’t know how he’s affecting you, this isn’t supposed to happen. wetness fills between your legs.

“i think you’re very attractive and maybe you need a woman by your side to help with this shitty town. i may look innocent, but i’ve done unspeakable things baby.” he smirks, eyeing your features. “you wouldn’t last five minutes in my gang babygirl. we’re feared internationally.” you hum, biting your lip. “i’ve terrorized gods and men alike. nothing scares me.” you reach to hold his cheek. “maybe it’s you that wouldn’t last five minutes with me.” you wink, caressing the apple of his cheeks. you feel his cheeks becoming warm. “why don’t we test that theory then darling. you sure you want me and you can handle me? i wouldn’t want to be the same person that asshole downstairs.” you shake your head. “you’re so much better than him. give me your worst-“ you lean into his ear “-daddy.”

he steps back, eying your figure. “you play a wonderful lie darling, but i’m not fooled. i suggest you tell me why you’re really here or im getting my friends up here. you do not want that sweetheart.” he pulls a knife from his pocket, holding it against your throat. you laugh. “oh kihyun, you really think this knife scares me? you’re all bark and no bite baby.” his pupils dilate, pushing the knife closer to your throat. “don’t fucking push me brat.” you stare at each other for a moment before you push him away. you punch his stomach, making him stumble back. “instead of using the cowards way out, show me how tough this mafia leader really is.” he scoffs. “im not hitting a lady. get out before i change my mind.” you walk towards him. “if you want me out so badly, why did you lock the door?” you push him to his knees and knee him in the jaw, making him lay flat on the floor. “i suggest you do as i say or you’ll be my next victim.” he sighs. he wraps his leg around yours, pulling you to the ground. he punches you hard in the gut, making you whine slightly. he pulls out a walkie talkie. “boys, get up here, now.” your eyes widen.

“they will be here soon unless you apologize darling, i suggest you do so.” you sigh, not wanting to ruin your plan, “i’m sorry kihyun...im just fighting because its all i know how to do. I’ll leave you alone.” he lets you up and calls his members. “nevermind that, boys. i’ve got it handled.” you let a small smile show to your face. you turn to leave his office when he stops you. “y/n, i never thought i’d beg to anyone but we definitely need you in our group. we may look handsome but its nothing to your beauty. not to mention, you can definitely fight and defend yourself. please darling, i’ll do anything.” you smile subconsciously. “oh how dumb can you really be?” you stare at him, watching him eye you up and down. “listen here. if i tell you my secret, i’d have to kill you, but just know that i can fight a lot better than what i did with you. i’ve never seen someone so handsome...it attracts me.” he smirks. “Well, what do i need to do so you’ll join Monsta X princess?” you stare at him for a moment before softly pecking his lips. “how about you show me how one of the most feared leaders is when he’s begging to cum?” something switched in his eyes, you could see it. “i definitely will, brat.”

he picks you up with ease and slams you on his desk. his lips are devouring yours and his tongue is exploring every part of your mouth. “how the hell is a mortal making me so aroused?” he leaves your lips to mark your neck. your body is getting antsy. “as much as i love this, just fuck me already kihyun...or is it that you’re too weak to please me?” he grabs your throat, closing his hands. The loss of air is so thrilling, you almost don’t want him to leave. “princess, that’s not the case at all. you better learn your place quickly or you’re not cumming at all tonight.” he rips off your shirt, taking a second to view you. “so beautiful darling...and all for me.” you smile at his words. he removes your pants, leaving you in just your lacey boyshorts. “i swear if he judges me for wearing boyshorts, i will actually kill him” he removes them, staring directly at your pussy. “so wet...yet you called me weak? how ironic.” he licks a stripe on you, your entire body losing itself. “sweet tasting, beautiful looking and is badass? you must be my dream.” he goes back to your pussy, eating you as if he has never tasted food before. moans leave your mouth, your mind can’t even process words. “kihyun...don’t fucking stop please...holy shit.” he doesn’t respond verbal;y, he responds with pushing his index finger into your soaking cunt. “god…. i cannot wait to feel these walls against my cock. so perfect princess.” a familiar feeling is bubbling inside you. “kihyun, im so close...please let me cum!” he looks up at you, smirking at your already fucked out state. “since you asked so nicely, cum all over my tongue darling.” he starts eating you out again, his tongue and fingers moving faster than the speed of light. you scream his name as you cum. he leans up, licking his lips. “the sweetest thing i’ve ever had baby. he removes his shirt, showing you his inked chest. “holy shit, how does he keep getting hotter?” he sees you looking at his chest. “you got a staring problem baby. i know, they make me so irresistible.” you roll your eyes. “come fuck me already or i will blue ball you in a split second.” his eyes widen. he takes his pants off, slipping his boxers off with them. “are you on birth control?” he softens a bit. “im not able to get pregnant, and i wont tell you why.” he laughs. “jeez, so hostile.” he slowly pushes in, watching your reaction. “holy shit kihyun…” he sighs. “so warm and wet...i am definitely not gonna last long.” he pushes further until he bottoms out. he watches how your body is reacting, making sure he isn’t actually hurting you. “please move kihyun. i can’t wait any longer.” he pulls out slowly only to go back in harder. he picks up his pace, moans bouncing off the walls. “shit...you’re so perfect y/n, i wish i could stay in this pussy all day.” you can’t pronounce anything but his names and very explicit words. you’re uncontrollably squeezing down on his cock, making him falter his pace. “you’re squeezing down on me….god im so close.” you can feel another orgasm bubbling inside you. “k-kihyun, please please please let me cum, wanna-wanna cum all over your cock.” his breathing and pace is becoming irregular. “yes... yes princess, cum all over my cock.” he rubs your clit, making you scream. your orgasm hits you hard, your body shaking uncontrollably. “princess…. holy shit!” he pulls out of you, shooting his cum all over your stomach. he sighs, still getting over his high. he grabs a tissue from his desk and wipes you clean. he helps you back into your clothes. he starts dressing himself, wearing a permanent smile. “so, is that what i needed to do for you to join my gang, princess?” you scoff, rolling your eyes.

“you’re so arrogant kihyun, but hell yes.”

oh my goodness my baby is finally out!! it took a while for me to finish this but i absolutely love this

#godsamongus #kihyun smut

[khaleesiofalicante]

HI, IT'S ME! YOUR LOCAL CHAOTIC WEIRDO!!!!! I'M BACK AGAIN LIKE I AM TWICE EVERY WEEK

IT'S MY BOY DAVID THIS TIME! WHY AM I SO HYPER! MAYBE BECAUSE THEY KISSED! AND I HAD TO SUPPRESS MY SCREAMS BCAUSE IM IN CLASS AND THE REST OF MY FAMILY IS OUTSIDE MY DOOR (NOT LITERALLY OFC)

OK OK OK OK OK OK

MAX AND DAVID ARE AT THE LONDON INSTITUTE YESYESYESYES

He rather liked that part in a story – when the hero fell, and everything seemed bleak. It always meant that hope was just around the corner. Because darkness never lasted. It was always followed by light. There was nothing more beautiful than that kind of sunrise.

THIS

I literally live my life by this analogy

AHHH DAVID IS ON HIS TRAVEL YEAR AND MAX IS WITH HIM

SCREAM

well i can't scream because my mom is sitting right there and I have class in 4 minutes so imma smile really wide

“Are you planning to read the entire library during your travel year?” Max chuckled.

“Of course not,” David replied. “I will need longer than a year to accomplish that goal.”

Me.

Wait

does max not being able to make portals have something to do with his lineage?

like

demon parent

ok so my programming class started 2 minutes early but screw programming I'm gonna be studying minds not this shit

ok that's a very bad attitude for someone who needs good grades in this year

Max was always hungry.

this is so me

KIT

KIT

KIT

KIT

KIT

KIT

TY

THEY MENTIONED TY

also if David doesn't become an institute head in the future THEN WHAT'S THE POINT

“Where is the kitchen?” Max interrupted.

max is such a mood

He had told Max that he had centuries to perfect his magic, that there was no need to rush it. Max had given him a noncommittal nod and nothing more.

HE'S GONNA MAKE THE BEST PORTALS YOU'LL SEE

“I won’t tell the Consul,” Kit winked.

At the mention of the Consul, David straightened up. He had been trying to get into Alec Lightwood’s good graces for years now. He didn’t think sharing a room with his son would do him any favors.

DAVID UDUCDFUHKDUHVUHSDH

PLEASE IF WE DON'T GET A CUTE ALEC AND DAVID SCENE SOON

KIT CALLED TESSA MOM

oh my god

Word was that Mr. Herondale had gone back to his obsession with brewing tea.

JACE

I have so many emotions right now but all I'm gonna say is that I'm so so proud of Rafael

“Do you not want to sleep with me?” Max asked.

UH-

WELL-

DAVID STOP THINKING ABOUT THE FUTURE AND ALL THE SHIT

STOP IT

OH MY GOD THE ONE BED TROPE

MAX IS IN HIS ARMS I'M ABOUT TO-

takes a deep breath don't scream. everyone outside this door thinks you're taking programming class

OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE JUST GET TOGETHER ALREADY

AWW JULIAN PAINTED PORTRAITS FOR THE INSTITUTE

The one of Will Herondale and Tessa Gray – A love that had transcended reality and lasted a lifetime.

The one of James Herondale and Cordelia Carstairs – A love that had started with a lie and then blossomed into nothing but happiness and devotion.

The one of Lucie Herondale and Jesse Blackthorn – A love that had been so powerful that it rewrote the past.

The one of Jace Herondale and Clary Fairchild – A love that had walked through hell and shaken up the heavens.

And then there the final one. The one of Kit Herondale and Tiberius Blackthorn – A love that had survived distance and darkness and doom.

This omg...

He wanted a love story. The kind he read in the books. The kind he saw in these portraits.

But he wasn’t a Herondale. He wasn’t sure if he was destined for that kind of love.

HEY

DON'T THINK LIKE THAT

The first part though

same

He might have been a little too excited. It was biologically impossible to control yourself when you find a stranger reading your favorite book in the whole world.

SO TRUE

“I see you already made a new friend,” Max said.

He sounded a little…odd. As if he was not pleased that David had made a new friend.

honey...

take a guess

can I jump in and bash their heads together?

“You are thinking of conjuring chocolate syrup, aren’t you?” David chuckled.

“How do you always know what’s on my mind?” Max chuckled back.

Because I know you, David wanted to say. I just wish I knew what’s in your heart too.

OH MY GOD I CANT WITH THIS

“You get chocolate syrup! You get chocolate syrup! You get chocolate syrup!” Max was yelling, standing on the chair.

They residents laughed harder, and David shook his head fondly. He hoped one day Max would pursue a career in theatre. He was a born showman.

can I have chocolate syrup?

also, the way David is just so fond of him like DYUSDGYJCDYUJM

“By the angel, do you have to be a drama queen about everything?” the boy next to them muttered – not so quietly.

David blinked. That was uncalled for.

But Max being Max was completely unfazed. “Of course I do. My Bapa would be personally offended otherwise.”

exactly you rude little shit

Max often pretended like people’s words didn’t hurt him - just as he pretend that fire doesn’t burn or wounds don’t bleed.

wow ok stop calling me out

Is max jealous??????

is he??????

how are people so good at languages like damn

TY

TY

TY

TY

“Oh my god,” Max groaned. “Is he already telling people to check on me?”

LMAO

using mundane medicine...

that's risky

but it's also something that WILL help

can't warlocks tamper with the blood samples?

A part of him wondered if that’s why he had agreed to send Max away to London – at least for a week. Because sometimes you didn’t want other people to see you were hurting.

alec I really goddamn hope you're dealing with this well

some of whom had even decided to die than get help from a warlock.

alright then gets my knives but you chose this :D

Nobody brought a book down for breakfast if they didn't like to read.

yes but sometimes also to seem busy so people won't bother you or you won't look alone.

“I know,” the boy said as he walked past them to the gate. “I sat on the stairs and thought about life for a few good minutes.”

his family is the one who took over David's previous institute (i can't spell that. marse- marselli- wat??) methinks.

The gang always visited whenever all of them were in the city together. They would have so much fun! Of course, the 'fun' mostly entailed Rafael stopping Georgia from drinking random potions she found in the stalls, Selena stopping Lexi from opening a psychic booth to help people talk to Raziel and of course David stopping Max from running to the gambling booths.

LMAO, I CANT WITH THIS-

Rafe: I am anxiety.

me at any given moment

EW TESTICLES HE'S EATING THOSE-

ok maybe I'm the only person who's really picky when it comes to food and doesn't eat the majority of things

“Anything on Magnus Bane?” Max asked.

“No,” the woman snapped and shoved some of the letters into a bag and hide it under the table. “Leave Magnus Bane alone!”

“Appreciate your loyalty,” Max winked at her and started examining a diary.

I like her.

"Everyone should be participating in this" -my programming teacher

me, an intellectual: participating in what?? goes to the class web THE FUCK IS THAT

“Something for the shadowhunter?” the woman smiled. “Perhaps an unpublished snippet from the Beautiful Cordelia?”

“Do you have any love letters?” David asked.

“Hmmm,” the woman went through the pages. “I do have a correspondence between an Iblis demon and Christopher Lightwood? Would you be interested in that?”

if u don't mind I would love to see both of those-

you know I just remembered I have a computer assignment I need to submit by the end of this week fml

“Never fall in love with an immortal,” she giggled again. “We don’t like staying in one place.”

SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP

MAX WHERE ARE YOU

why are we using x and 3 in programming class what the heck is going on

“I’m not just some warlock,” Max said, his voice low. “I’m Magnus Bane’s son.”

GIVE HIM THAT NECKLACE BACK

we usually have programming once a week on our physical school days and those are fun because my and my friend are continuously passing notes and talking to each other through writing

The scene where Max fought off all the evil people who tried to steal his valuable belonging. He would fight without breaking a sweat and throw magic fireballs at everyone and then get his necklace back. And then he would kiss David in front of everyone and it would somehow rain all of a sudden.

But life wasn’t a movie or a book. Life was just life.

life's boring

fuck life

I just heard a student ask "why are we not taking out the values of b and c" BESTIE I THOUGHT WE WERE DOING PROGRAMMING AND NOT ALGEBRA?????

“I know there wasn’t anyone to protect you before,” Magnus Bane had said. “But we are here now. We will protect you. This will protect you.”

He hadn’t wanted it back then. He didn't even want it even now.

He didn’t want something to protect him. Most importantly, he didn’t want to cover his scar. He didn’t want to hide it. He wasn’t ashamed of it. It wasn’t a mark of a victim. It was the mark of a survivor.

So, David had smiled and given the bracelet back.

“I never wanted to be protected,” David had replied. “I only ever wanted to be loved.”

The warlock had smiled at that and given David a hug. It had felt different than other hugs he had experienced since he had come to New York.

It wasn’t just the magic. Magnus Bane carried so much love inside himself you could literally feel it through him.

I'm gonna cry during my programming class (where we're doing variables apparently all of a sudden??)

this is so beautiful

“I wasn’t talking about Bapa,” Max said now. “I was talking about the other one.”

David chuckled at that. “Oh, yeah. He is definitely going to kill you.”

what flowers would you like at your funeral?

so Jackson has family troubles

I've definitely got that

yeah I know what it's like to be jealous of someone else's perfect family

JACKSON WTF

Is he trying to ruin max's relationship with his family???

oh hell no

JACKSON THE AUDACITY

“One stolen necklace, One broken nose and One bruised cheek,” he said. “And you’ve been in London for less than a day.”

kit seriously? but is he wrong though?

“This is what I get for falling for a Lightwood-Bane,” David sighed and walked through the portal.

WELL AT LEAST HE'S SELF AWARE

Jackson...

in some ways, I can empathize with him. my younger self anyway. but Jackson this is not how you do things

There was a moment of silence and then Magnus Bane giggled.

“I do love it when the quiet ones go feral,” the warlock grinned.

MAGNUS

NOT.THE.TIME

(me too)

“David!” Mr Herondale gasped. “Is your hand okay?”

yup that's Jace y'all

David hated violence. He hated fighting – which he was often not allowed to say out loud considering he was a shadowhunter.

But it was the truth. He hated hurting people – or even things. It made him feel sick.

“It’s alright, Chouchou,” Mr Herondale ran a hand through David’s hair. “Next time, just-”

“Use my words?” David asked.

“Just don’t get caught,” the man winked.

and that is why I would never want to be a shadowhunter.

I know saying that doesn't do anything but when I first read tsc I wanted to be a shadowhunter really badly and damn that was some time ago but now...violence of any kind is my biggest trigger idek why. and I hate that so much because what kind of a person gets triggered by loud voices and fighting EVEN ON SCREEN??? I usually just push myself to watch stuff because it's dumb. I refuse to see trigger warnings before reading a book or watching a show because damn it, I should be able to stand those things I'm, not a child. and it may be doing me more harm than good but I shouldn't feel like this in the first place

okay...that was long

ANYWAY

“David, I appreciate you standing up for Max,” the Consul said. “But next time, please try not to punch anyone in the face.”

“Yes, sir,” David nodded. “Because it’s wrong.”

“Because it means more paperwork for me,” the Consul groaned and then straightened up. “But yes. Absolutely. Very wrong. No punching people!”

LMAO ALEC

Jackson...

oh

oh

oh

I was wrong then

He was grinning. Magnus Bane must have raised hell in the shadow market.

that must have been fun

Max was doing that thing where he was not trying to pout but he was mostly definitely pouting. It made David want to kiss him. But then the Consul spoke, and David reminded himself he didn’t want to be the third person to get punched in the face this evening.

well-

“I understand that Jackson has been through a lot. But that’s not an excuse for him to hurt those around him. I learned that lesson the hard way. So, you shouldn’t excuse his behaviour.”

someone's trauma and pain is never an excuse to hurt others

but that doesn't mean we should invalidate their trauma either

“You can stay back and try to help him. I won’t stop you,” the man got up now. “But if he tries to hurt you-”

“You will unleash hell?” David chuckled.

“Worse,” the other man grinned. “I will unleash Lexi.”

that is much much worse

Books brought him comfort in so many ways. Just holding one in his hands automatically made him feel better.

oh my god

he gets it

I always have a book with me when I'm out even if I'm not gonna get the time to read it because just the weight and comfort of it in my hands or in my backpack brings me so much comfort and helps with my social anxiety so much

no one understands when I try to tell them that

you get it...

someone gets it finally

AYYY IRENE

“David, it’s very sweet that you want to protect Jackson,” Kit pointed out. “But literally no one is buying that. Not even Irene.”

The lynx purred on his lap as if she agreed with Kit.

“I could break into a liquor cabinet,” David said a little indignantly.

David is the nicest you can get

David wouldn’t. Apparently, everyone already seemed to know that - even the lynx he had met five minutes ago.

we are solving something in class and it's really quiet because we're all doing our work (I'm reading the fic so-) and this one person had their mic open and they kept on whispering their steps and it was so weird I cant-

BUT YES DAVID IS A CINNAMON ROLL. EVEN THE LYNX KNOWS

“We were talking about shitty fathers,” Jackson pointed out. “You’re welcome to stay.”

“I’m gonna need something stronger than red wine for this conversation,” Kit chuckled.

I remember that bitch

David used to do it when he was a child. He used to pretend his life was a story. He used to pretend everything that happened to him was happening to some other boy – a boy who wasn’t real. A boy who lived inside a book. Because it hurt a little less when you pretend like it wasn’t happening to you.

But the pain was still very real.

OK YOU CAN STOP CALLING ME OUT NOW

“I fucking hate ogres,” he said through gritted teeth.

“Was your father an ogre too?” Jackson asked.

“He was more like a harpy,” Kit snorted. “He was always flying and fleeing. I didn’t know how deep his talons were in my head until it was too late.”

you really like traumatizing all your characters, don't you?

I really fucking hope the ogre got what he deserved

and if the angel is dead then fuck everyone

“I mean, there was that time when Sebastian Morgenstern turned my father into the endarkened, and then he went around killing people. So, I would say he was more like a zombie,” the man was explaining now. “The zombie father tried to kill me but my brother killed him first.”

“Good lord!” Jackson said in shock.

Kit chuckled softly. “Boy do shadowhunters need therapy.”

they really do

He knew about those from New York. He knew Mr Herondale and Miss Fairchild went for one together.

YES GET THEM THERAPY

“Yikes,” Kit chuckled. “I’d prefer something classier. How about London Boys?”

“None of us are from London though,” Tiberius pointed out.

“The Beatles are not actually beetles, Ty,” Kit chuckled. “It’s just for pizazz.”

damn guys

Then the idea of a band turned into a possible YouTube channel where they would react to cute animal videos.

YS DO IT

“When people do awful things, really awful things, at one point we stop being surprised. Like what Valentine did to his children or what our fathers did to us or what those women did to Rafael. We might have been shocked or disgusted. But it wasn’t unrealistic, was it?”

“I guess not,” the boy said.

“Even when they did the most unimaginable acts of cruelty, it somehow managed to fit into our imagination. We accepted that the world can be unrealistically cruel. The kind of cruelty we will never understand. But why isn’t it the same for kindness? Why is that when someone is too kind, we automatically feel uncomfortable? We judge their intensions or think they are just pretending to be nice. We think they are being unrealistic. Why is that?”

we get so used to cruelty that kindness feels weird

“But that’s how our life works, doesn’t it? It’s a giant ball of what ifs and could have beens and if nots. What if my father had loved me instead of hurt me? Could I have been kinder if I was hugged instead of being abused? Would have I been a different person if not for my trauma? Our lives are an endless collection of theories about our real selves. The one didn’t we never had the chance to become.”

THIS

I used to spend a bunch of time on the what-ifs but those are useless. so screw the what-ifs and live in the present

“I guess we’ll never know, Jackson. None of us will never know how we would have turned out if things had been different for us. We never got the chance to be who were meant to be. Instead, we became who we had to become to survive what we went through. We will never know our true selves. We only know the version of us that made it through all the trauma.”

“Christ, that’s depressing,” Jackson said.

“It is,” David nodded. “But we made it through. We survived. I think we should focus on that.”

you survived. that's what matters

“There is nothing wrong with wanting to be rescued,” David smiled.

I wish I had heard this before...

maybe I don't always have to be strong. maybe it's ok sometimes just want to be saved.

I'm so happy that both Jackson and David found each other

David had learned Gaelic. Jackson had learned how to play the piano.

They had laughed and lived and loved and learned.

And they had survived – one day at a time. The London Boys.

they survived.

I know I'm always key smashing and screaming but these words, these lines, all these chapters mean so so much to me.

“You’ll write to me, won’t you?” David asked, hugging Jackson closely.

“No,” Jackson replied. “I will FaceTime you like a normal person, you weirdo!”

David laughed at that. “I prefer letters. They are more emotional.”

“I’ll text you,” Jackson countered. “With emojis.”

oh to have someone write me letters.

I love writing letters

once at the end of a school year, I wrote little letters to everyone in my class anonymously. even the people who had been mean to me. that was like 1-2 years after my transfer to that school and everyone practically hated me but I wanted to do something nice because who knows what someone is going through. I ended up not putting them in people's desks...

I threw them all away :)

but writing letters is superior

I often write my feelings down and give the letter to someone rather than talk to someone

if you receive a letter from me or a custom-made gift...you have reached my ultimate friendship

oh my god. THIS IS HOW I SHOULD TALK TO ONE OF MY FRIENDS ABOUT MY FEELINGS

It's kind of been a mess between us and I want to talk to her but I didn't know how to.

this is why i shouldn't send asks-

JACKSON CATCHING UP ON MAX AND DAVID

“You know what it means,” Jackson grinned harder. “Also, if that wanker tries to break your heart, I will break his face.”

“You know he is the Consul’s son?” David giggled.

“I’ve done it once and I will do it again,” Jackson shrugged. “He better treat you right.”

"wanker"

I HAVE A BRITISH ONLINE FRIEND AND THEY CALLED OUR AMERICAN ONLINE FRIEND A WANKER

AND OUR OTHER BRITISH FRIEND JOINED IN

WHILE ALL THE NON-BRITISH PEOPLE WERE LIKE "huh"

Lexi had cut her hair even shorter. Her girlfriend apparently got something called an undercut.

“Just in case someone dared to assume we were straight,” she had winked at him.

how many years has this fake dating been going on...

CENTURION SELENA

fterA the twins went to bed, David stepped out of the institute and went looking for his heart.

"went looking for his heart"

OH FUCK I FORGOT TO JOIN MY CLASS

MAX STOP DEPLETING YOUR SELF GODDAMN

And then somewhere along the way, Max’s heartbeat had become the steadiest thing in David’s life.

Max, with all his chaos and drama and danger, had become the steadiest thing in David’s life.

oh my god that's a parallel from canon

“Tell me why.”

“Ain't nothing but a heart break!!"

Max-

Max could make fireballs that killed demons on the spot. He could summon things from anywhere. He could heal people with his eyes closed. He was one of the youngest warlocks allowed to visit the spiral labyrinth.

Max was a warlock in every sense. A good one. A great one even.

he is so talented...

Only idiots would underestimate Magnus Bane’s power.

EXACTLY

He is probably going to be Consul like next week.”

David chuckled. “Next week?”

next week????

“Yeah, his smoking habits,” Max rolled his eyes.

Rafael wasn’t the smoker in the family. He knew who it was, but David would never open his mouth. It wasn’t his secret to tell.

this keeps on getting better

“It’s my hair!” David laughed.

“And you’re my David!” Max argued. “I say you are not allowed to grow your hair.”

MY DAVID

MY DAVID

MY DAVID

“I don’t want to downworld-splain it to you.”

Max blinked and then laughed. “You don’t want to what?”

“Downworld-splain,” David mumbled. “It’s when shadowhunters explain downworlders how to be downworlders.”

they were SO close to kissing

I'm gonna get in there and lock them in a closet together and tell them to FUCKING GET WITH IT

Remember who you are. Remember where you stand.

remember who you are. remember where you stand...

I know this is supposed to be about portals.

OH MY GOD THEY KISSED

THEY KISSED

IM SO CLOSE TO SCREAMING CLASS AND EVERYONE OUTSIDE THIS ROOM BE DAMNED

OH MY GOD DAVID FELL

reminds me of when alec fell down the stairs-

OH MY GOD I'M GONNA SCREAM

WE'RE GONNA GET MORE MAVID CONTENT SOON I'M SCREAMING INTERNALLY UYDRVFY7VSDU7UYVFSDUYGCADUYIGJCDSHJKGDVCSUGISDVHVF

ok, I have a computer assignment to get to and tests to study for. BUT I LOVED THIS CHAPTER SO SO MUCH!! THEY FINALLY KISSED I'M SO HAPPY!!!!!

Also I know I tend to go off track and you can totally ignore that. i just go crazy. BYEE

This live blog gives me so much life you don't even know. I am go glad you enjoyed the chapter. I love hearing you rant about it. It's refreshing lol.

And I looooooove the lil anecdotes you share in between. Also wtf is a programming class like nobody wants to learn programme what kind of hetero nonsense I-

FINISH YOUR ASSIGNMENTS AND STUDY FOR YOUR TESTS I'LL SEE YOU SOON :)

#lbaf

[haljordangreenjedi]

you should assign 3 songs to 5 characters of your choosing and explain why you chose them

Kon, pls know I love you and I’m answering this before I do my physics homework. (the links are for spotify!!)

5 songs for 3 characters (bc god help me i can’t vibe with five characters rn, my brain is broken.):

Hal Jordan:

1. Achilles Come Down by Gang of Youths

i have angsted about Hal with this song for LITERAL MONTHS OKAY. Hal is Achilles, the negative voice is basically Hal’s depression and Barry is the positive voice for obvious reasons. you can thank me later.

2. Fake Fine by Robert Grace

Twenty-seven, life is Armageddon I've got clinical depression 'cause my mind's an imperfectionist

But I forget just what the question is 'Cause I'm a fuck-up Stuck here with my hands cuffed Behind my back, tryin' to keep myself intact

hi yes all of these things are confirmed in Hal’s life and you cannot TELL ME that Hal doesn’t put up a front because he Does.

3. Morning In America by Jon Bellion

i mean really this just invoked Hal for me, the song is talking about everything that’s actually going on behind the scenes, and that’s just how i see Hal? All the important stuff is behind the scenes and Hal’s been trying to live up to Martin’s memory his whole life. is that how other people see it? i dunno.

4. Pretender - Acoustic by AJR

i think im just chanting the same thing over and over because like, really all of these picks are just me chanting the same thing in different words, but... yeah.

5. Danny Phantom by Spencer Jordan

look, he’s.... he’s Danny Phantom, okay? think about it. because i can’t stop thinking about it, so now you have to.

Stephanie Brown:

1. Twinkle Lights by The Sonder Bombs

And at 14 years old I was basically fully grown I was 14 years old but still the saddest kid I’ll ever fuckin' know

(that’s it, that’s the tweet.)

2. long story short by Taylor Swift

I tried to pick my battles 'til the battle picked me Misery Like the war of words I shouted in my sleep And you passed right by I was in the alley, surrounded on all sides The knife cuts both ways If the shoe fits, walk in it 'til your high heels break

it literally just feels like Steph telling the story of her life.

3. Since I Was A Kid by Lennon Stella

it *screams* Steph’s origin story and explains like why she is the way that she is.

4. ocean eyes by Billie Eilish

*cough* TimSteph *cough*

5. Outskirts Of Paradise by Bad Suns

I'm on the outskirts of paradise Chasing desire through the night Picturing ways to take flight When the time comes

Steph and being a Robin/Batgirl/the Spoiler. :)

Jason Todd:

1. Don’t Throw Out My Legos by AJR

this is both like, Jason wanting to grow up and not be viewed as the kid he was when he died, while still wanting a place in the family, secretly.

2. The Way We Get By by Spoon

it feels like it could be a take on Crime Alley, but that of someone from there, so to Jason it goes. (i’m trying to give different vibes here.)

3. Burn This City by Cartel

Cause our days were numbered by nights on too many rooftops. They said we're wasting our lives, Oh at least we know, that if we die - we lived with passion. They said we'd burn so bright. We burn this city and go.

it’s the batkid anthem.

4. Spirits by The Strumbellas

I've been lookin' at the stars tonight And I think, oh, how I miss that bright sun I'll be a dreamer 'til the day I die And they say, oh, how the good die young?

Jason and his life as a (technically) deceased boy.

5. Sick Boy by The Chainsmokers

really, it just feels like a cynical take Jason would have? 

Honorable Mention Songs:

1. invisible string by Taylor Swift

it’s a barry and iris love song, okay. they’re the gold standard.

2. Old Friends by Ben Rector

ITS HAL AND BARRY AS CHILDHOOD FRIENDS OKAY YES I JUST CAME UP WITH THIS ONE AT THE LAST MINUTE BUT REALLY.

3. No Peace In Quiet by Delta Rae

this could be literally any superhero with *anyone* that’s died in any comic continuity, but Hal or Iris after Barry dies really fits, because these are the people that I am currently obsessed with and you can’t tell me that Hal didn’t love his best friend and get absolutely wrecked by his death. (but yeah, uhhh speedster love interests after their speedster gets sucked into the speed force—this one’s for you.

#tag: katie answers things.... sometimes #tag: i have friends i definitely have friends #tag: the dead robins quintet

[wintersxsoul]

SO SHOOT US, WE WERE DATING!

Summary: Reverse Fake Dating Undercover Cops! AU

Pairing/s: Bucky x Reader / Steve x Sam / Nat x Sharon

Word count: 1.3k

Warnings: Tbh we dont know ?? we just love being a mess together I guess,, we had to do it to ‘em. We even made moodboards, enjoy our masterpiece.

A/N: So, two crackheads, aka @trashpanda-barnes and yours truly, decided after a long intense brainstorming session to put this ramblings together to create this crackheadassery show. Buckle up for a part 2 laid ease and gentle ants.

Shay: this was our first time sharing a googledoc and HOLYSHIT technology has come so far, its a miracle Lydia hasn’t killed me yet bc of all the font-changing I kept doing constantly. anyway... we done did a thing, fellas! Our two collective braincells present… this.

Bucky and Y/n have been dating for almost three years, they are both cops in the same squadron, so it’s forbidden for them to date. But they said: fuck this shit and now they even live together, but…. secretly.

Steve is also a cop in the same precinct and he is dating Sam, a pastry chef.

Y/n and Bucky have to infiltrate in a Biker Gang for a case and of course pretend they are not actually in love or anything pfft why would anybody think that?? They are just roommates, right???

They flirt with random members of the gang to avert suspicions and then give advice to each other to make it seem more real.

One day, Bucky accidentally tells Y/n, "You're absolutely right, honey!" and everyone just stares at him so he just...he has to start calling everyone pet names 24/7. It’s his new personality trait so he has to answer with a pet name to even the big boss. “Have a nice day today, James.” Bucky just nods at him smiling, but since everyone is staring at him, he swallows thickly and answers: “You too, sugar.”

Everytime that happens, Y/n is just hollering with Natasha, a member of the gang. Nat is fierce and ruthless, the only one that hasn’t got a pet name. One time Bucky tried, but she just looked him dead in the eye and warned, “don’t.” And that was it. Best day of both girl’s lives at the gang was the day Bucky told Thor, the most dangerous looking dude, “Love your bike, doll.” Thor had smiled widely at that compliment.

The dudes on the gang decided they wanted a bonding moment so they all went to get tacos. They drop Y/n at home and it’s funny to her because Bucky can't get off so he just awkwardly waves goodbye at her in front of the building of THEIR shared apartment. So he just directs them to Steve's place and he’s like "Hey Steve! Can you buzz me in, babe?!" and Steve of course is all "the fuck you on about?! What the hell are you doing here???"

And those big bulky dudes outside are confused and kinda suspicious so Bucky is like "We had a fight.... he's still mad at me" he says like the liar he is. So he tries again and yells at Steve over the buzzer "hEY OPEN UP STEVE, IT’S ME PLEASE WE CAN TALK ABOUT THIS, I PROMISE, IM SORRY BABE BUT I AM HOME NOW."

Steve has Sam over, and this was their date night and Steve promised, he promised Sam he’d stop bringing his work home. So he is like "this is not the time, I’m with Sam right n—"

bucky interrupts "SAAAAME YES, I WISH I was with you, same babe same... please buzz me in??" Steve just hangs up like, “goodnight, Bucky”

The dudes are sympathetic and are like.. "sorry your boyfriend ain't letting you in man. Hey, you wanna crash at any of ours?"

So Bucky just sighs and nods, texting Y/n to tell her he’s crashing at this super huge dude’s house, Riley.

Riley looks so fucking frightening but he is actually super soft and lives with his equally soft girlfriend, Aaliah.  

And they have two adopted stray dogs. And both of the dogs really take to Bucky.

One is a golden yellow and the other is a soft white. The white one, Bucky notices, is missing a leg.

“Lost it in a car accident”, Riley tells Bucky, “We’re just glad he came out of it alive” And the dog gives Bucky’s face a big fat lick. “What’s he called?” “oh, Winter” and Bucky near-about cries. Y/n’s phone blows up with 500 images of Bucky with the dogs alone. The golden one, Bucky learns is called, Summer.

He's an especially big fan of Riley’s cookies. Riley loves being a part of the gang but he also has a pastry business on the side. Bucky buys a shitton of cookies to take home.

He calls Y/n next morning to tell her they should go to the shelter and adopt as many cats and dogs as they can, and Y/n just sighs because she knows she can’t fight Bucky over this. “Who’ll look after then when we’re at the precinct?” Y/N tries to point out but Bucky is like, “Easy. We just take them to the precinct with us.”

Natasha eventually figures out that they are dating, and interrogates Y/n about their actual purpose in the gang.

Y/n blows up the cover and explains that they are trying to find a gang that sells drugs and that their Captain, Nick Fury, thought they were responsible. After a few months undercover, they realize they all are just soft bikers that like to dress in black leather and chunky boots.

Nat is actually scary, at least that’s what Bucky thinks, but Y/n has seen her with Liho, Nat‘s cat, and she is sure that she just likes to mess with the guys and scare them.

Y/n makes Nat swear not to tell the others yet, and Nat is actually the one who offers a lead about the gang that was actually selling drugs.

“See? if you’d just come clean right up front you wouldn’t have wasted your time chasing the wrong lead” she rebukes Y/n. “But then I’d never have been friends with you, Nat” she nudges Nat’s shoulder and there’s that hint of that signature smile on Nat’s lips.

Y/n tells Bucky about the lead and they decide to shadow that gang on a stakeout and just as Nat had suggested, they catch the actual culprits red-handed, bringing the case to a close.

Thor and Riley are devastated when Bucky comes clean and tells them he has to leave them. “but we can walk our dogs together every morning, Riley!”

Once the case is closed, Bucky and Y/n decide to tell everyone that they’ve been dating for a few years and their squadron just sigh loudly.

Sharon is like, “What? We still gotta pretend we didn’t know? oh okay.”

“You guys KNEW?” “Of course we did,” Tony shakes his head, as he mockingly says, “oh my god they were roommates.”

Clint just sadly passes Fury a tenner. “I bet that you’d keep it a secret for five years.” he shakes his head at them, “I trusted you guys. But look at me, I’m poor now!” “what did Fury bet?” Bucky asks curiously. “that you’d mess up before this month ends.” Fury says before going back into his office.

Steve just glares at Sam once they find out, mouthing a “shut up” when his boyfriend tells him all proudly “I told you they were fucking!”.

Sam and Riley became good friends when they discovered their shared passion.

So they all live happily ever after, especially Bucky, cause he got to eat Riley’s cookies almost every morning while they walked Winter, Summer and Storm, his and Y/n’s puppy.

Y/n and Natasha became inseparable and thanks to that, Sharon and Nat started dating.

As Bucky said, they take the puppy to the precinct, everyone falling in love with the little fur ball. Y/n hates to admit it, but she adores Storm. And a few months later, she convinces Bucky to adopt a black cat. “Isn’t Storm gonna be jealous? Or what if they start fighting?” Y/n of course just shrugs and ignores Bucky’s protests. “they’ll keep each other company when we’re at work. Otherwise Storm will get lonely. And sad. Do you want to see Storm sad?” “No,” Bucky pouts, “fine we’re getting a cat. We’re proper parents now, doll. Whaddya say to that?” “We should buy stuff for them then, Detective... and who knows we might even have to get married?”

Bucky just smiles. He has the perfect proposal planned. Soon.

#bucky barnes x reader #reverse fake dating au #fake dating au #cop au #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes fluff #james bucky barnes #steve rogers #steve x sam #sharon x natasha #undercover cop #cop!bucky #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes imagine #marvel imagine #this was hilarious to make tbh #marvel fanfiction #bucky barnes fanfiction #lokissoul #trashpanda-barnes

[hiraethstill]

THIS WEEK ON DAIYA NO ACE (8/6)

SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT!

LIVEBLOG:

YEETS IVE BEEN W AITING FOR INTRASQUAD GAME

yess mimura and kawashima get a moment to shine

LMAO i love asou

also his hair is super cool

hell YEAH there are some great first years

omg the second and third years look like a mafia/gang

MY BABIES ASADA AND KUKI

lmao mogami really out here

natsukawa i love you

TAKU WHATS WITH YOUR CHEEKY GRIN LMAO

ah nvm thats why heh

its kinda strange to see taku wearing the white cap

CHILD I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

kuki starting!!!!!!!!!!!

and asada wishing his bf good luck

LMAO kuki why you gotta be all dramatic with your "okumura koushuu"

A WHOLEASS S O N

skldjg why'd yall have to prolong the shot of yui holding a hand in front of masashi like he's holding him back

ooh kagami another son

asahi... will have to remember that name

A

AS

ASADA CALLING KUKI KUKI-KUN IM NO T OK A Y

IM NOT o K         A            Y

aww asada bby youll gain confidence too!

what a lovely shot

eijun!

eijun's hair flying behind him is really pleasing

aww eijun wanting to be a good senpai to asada but also being considerate

harucchi working so hard im so proud of him

but also eat!!!

good job kanemaru taking care of people

(toujou in tow)

always trying to accomplish something... big mood

look at him... trying to smile...

i want to hug him

kanemaru go hug him for me!

HE'S SO?????????? PRETTY?????????

TOUJOU TOO I SWEAR

LISTEN

TOO MANY KUKI SHOTS TO SCREENSHOT BUT JUST KNOW HE'S BEING PRETTY AND WORKING HARD

why did ochiai look so different

takatsu!!!!

YES I KNOW ASADA YOU'RE CHEERING FOR YOUR BF YOU'RE DOING A GREAT JOB

kanemaru talking like he knows takatsu i demand interaction stat

HELL YEAH TALK ABOUT MY BOI TAKATSU LIKE THAT

takatsu's voice is partly right behind my nose its strange but i guess not bad?

I CHOKED ON MY FOOD WHEN TOUJOU CALLED HIM YOUHEI

HOW DID YOU FORGET SUN

damn right seidou is crazy but not in the way that you think kuki

asada get over here i will Hug You Fiercely

lmao koushuu lowkey throwing shade but not really

CLAP KOUSADA CLAP BATTERY CLAP

HAHAHAHA HOW MANY TIMES DID MOGAMI'S VA HAVE TO SAY THAT TO DO IT CORRECTLY

KUKI WITH THAT C ONFIDENCE

he would make a good captain hMMST

TAKU CONFIDENCE TOO

ASADA CHEERING KUKI ON HAS WATERED MY CROPS, CLEARED MY SKIN, FED MY CHILDREN--

ANOTHER GRATUITOUS KUKI SHOT

KARIBAAAAAAA

omg if kuki reminds kariba of sawamura then is this ace foreshadowing

i can still dream about kuki asada double ace right

SCREAMS ENDLESSLY INTO THE VOID

LOOK AT THEM

LOOK AT T H E M S T

aw kuki cares about toujou so much

WAAAAAAAAH ASADA'S LITTLE "YATTA"

omg kuki bleps too? 

like mochi like mukai lmaoo

LOVE THEM

okay yui your gay is showing hlskjdfs

masashi put yo aura away

good job kawashima!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

pats kariba gently

my heart is breaking for all these third years

esp nabe...

CRIES HARDER

THEY STILL WANT TO HELP OUT

STOP THIS PAIN I TELL YOU STOP IT

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

TAKATSUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

HOW DARE YOU PLAY WITH MY HEART LIKE THIS

representing them............. im not o kay.............

HLSKDGH THE LITTLE EMPHASIS MARK WHEN HE CALLS ASADA

KOUSHUU ITO TAKU GANBARREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

ASADA TOO OF COURSE

WORDS CANNOT EXPRESS HOW MUCH I LOVE ONE (1) SETO TAKUMA

AAAAAAA KUKI ENCOURAGING ASADA IN TURN I LOVE SUPPORTIVE BOYFRIENDS

oh god oh god have i also mentioned how GORGEOUS taku's voice is i cANNOT

asada bby i dont think youd have ever been ready for this game 

YAAAAAAAAAARGH KOUSHUU BEING ENCOURAGING

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH DEAD-LAST-AT-THE-DINNER-TABLE SQUAAAAAAAAD

WAAAAAAAAAAAAH ASADA REFLECTING ON KOUSHUU STANDING UP FOR HIM

I ALSO SUPPORT KOUSADA HAVE I MENTIONED THAT I SHOULD SAY IT AGAIN

"maybe he thought of me as a friend" ASADA FUCKING HIROFUMI WE LOVE THE HELL OUT OF YOU

SOMEONE HOLD ME

YOU SHOULD HEAR THE DYING WHALE NOISES IM MAKING

OH GOD

OH GOD

IM

IM DEAD GONE GOODBYE

okay sun we getting a lil cap happy here

eijun you doofus come out from behind there

LMAO "IS HE SCARED" KOUSHUU IS HIS FRIEND EIJUN

HYAHA ZONO AND MOCHI READ MY MIND

i fucking love love love how taku and koushuu shared that one brain cell right there

LSKDJFLGSHKG "he throws faster than me"

TAKU ENCOURAGING ASADA AAAAAAAA

at this point i should just make it an OT4 - koutakuasakuki

hell yeah pretty koushuu shot

hello have i introduced you to my SON

WAIT WAIT WAIT

REWIND

TAKU DAS GAY

ALSO HEIGHT DIFFERENCE

literally this looks like he's about to go in for the kiss

i meant the kill but same difference

WHY ARE YOU SO CUUUUUUUUUUUUTE

hsljkdfghjslkfdj IVE BEEN WAITING

FOR THE "taku, what was that."

AND TAKU'S VOICE ALL CHEEKY LIKE "NOTHING" MAKES IT EVEN BETTER theyre SO CUTE

im gonna watch this segment again

screams softly in koutaku rights

koushuu's so used to him like that lmaoo

he just gives him a reminder and moves on

ALSO EVERY TIME KOUSHUU AND TAKU CALL EACH OTHER TAKU AND KOUSHUU MY HEART JUST DOKI DOKIS SO DAMN HARD

what was that twitter post i saw today? the cliche meme with "oh my god the grumpy one is secretly in love with the sunshine one"

also obligatory pretty koushuu shot

asada is so confused poor bby

TAKU SHARING KOUSHUU'S BRAIN CELL I CANN O T

TALK ABOUT A DYNAMIC DUO

THEY ALREADY THINKING ABOUT WINNING

THE S OUN D ASADA MADE IM MCFUCKING DYING

LMFAOOOOO

couldnt get a screenshot but taku looking at koushuu like that makes me melt

even better koushuu pretending not to notice

audience members who asked you

this screams found family

eijun cheering asada on....... still behind that pole

what a goober

HYAHA MOCHI READING MY MIND AGAIN

LMAO "asada's an innocent guy" too true but also gdi eijun

ooh we stan asada being perceptive about koushuu

yessss asada you go kick ass

HYAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA "IM ALREADY DEAD"

HOLD UP IM LAUGHING TOO HARD AHAHAHA

taku i see you you lil goober hiding all blurry in the corner while koushuu calms asada down

koushuu havent you heard? tapping your glove against people's chests is gay

asada being formal @ koushuu lmaoo

and koushuu telling him not to straight up lmaoooo

TAKU WE GET IT YOU LOVE KOUSHUU

good JOB asada pitching from the stretch

no remarkable features??? no asada you are unique and wonderful and i love you

ooh the nice sound - that's koushuu's soft touch catching right

his cheeky grin and WHAT FOR

mochi's voice sighs happily

might as well give yall a cute eijun while im at it

OH YEAH

HELL YEAH PLAYING INFIELD IN AND GETTING AGGRESSIVE

oh hello that is an intense face you're making good sir

WHAT THATS IT SERIOUSLY?

GIVE ME MORE FIRSTIES

preview

taku!!

hahaha when you put kuki's face then asada's expression like that one after another

also them talking here

who's on fire?

cries softly of course you'll meet expectations asada

SUMMARY:

minor 3rd yr appreciation!

kuki's mindset STRONK

hug toujou RIGHT NOW

kane, toujou, kuki squad!

DEAD LAST AT THE DINNER TABLE SQUAD

my heart breaks for 3rd yrs who cant play

eijun a goober

koutakuasakuki JUST SAYIN

koutaku one smart brain cell

See you next week!!!

#daiya no ace act ii #daiya spoilers #spoilers #daiya no ace #seidou #okumura koushuu #seto takuma #asada hirofumi #kuki youhei

[roscoesykes]

The Man Comes Around || Wayward Sons

Part 1 /2

Summary: The family sends men to Swynlake in order to remind the Sykes brothers exactly what’s at stake for their disobedience to their father. 

Timestamp: September 9th, 2019. 

Triggers: Violence, fighting, gun use, knife use, graphic injury, torture, blood, death and all the triggers associated with such scenerios. HMU for a safe & simple TL;DR. 

“And I heard, as it were, the noise of thunder One of the four beasts saying, ‘Come and see.’ and I saw, and behold a white horse"

@desotosykes

ROSCOE: 

They caught him off guard. 

They caught him completely off guard - and it was only now that Roscoe realized just had complacent he had become. He'd stopped looking over his shoulder. Stopped wondering if people were around the corner. For the first time in a long time, Roscoe had been happy. He had a family that he loved, a brother by his side that was finally falling in love himself - a beautiful wife and a baby boy they loved dearly. Oliver, who he'd slowly but surely been accepting as someone he could learn to call his eldest son. 

God - there was really no describing how fucking happy he really was. So happy, and trying his best to stay out of trouble and that meant for the first time in his life, he wasn't paranoid either. It was almost freeing how amazing that could feel after living a life looking over his shoulder every day. 

It was just a goddamn shame that was what fucked him over now. 

The men that had come for him on his walk home from the Court wasted no time. Before he could even begin to struggle there was a rough punch to his gut that dropped him to his knees - prying hands immediately relieving him of the knife within his boot and the only protection he had, a bag shoved over his face before he could even draw in a breath from the air he'd expelled in a pained grunt. It was only after rough shoves, forceful pulls, harsh comments and a completely disorienting trip that the man had finally been shoved back down to a concrete floor. His palms scratched across the surface as the bag was ripped from his head - replaced instead with fingers that curled aggressively into his hair, ripping his head up from where he was crumpled upon the ground. 

"Keep your mouth shut and we ain't gonna have a problem." A voice hissed behind his ear, Roscoe's breath hitching lightly as he recognized that familiar tint of an accent, bringing forth the urge to struggle within the grip. It was only after a swift punch to his jaw that he stilled again, blood dripping from his lip as he grimaced and tried to relieve the pressure against his scalp. 

What the fuck had he gotten himself into…? 

DESOTO:

When DeSoto had first come to Swynlake his phone had gone off constantly. There was always a litany of texts and calls. Each one the same. Was the job done yet? Had he found Roscoe? What was taking so long? Why aren’t you answering our calls? The boss isn’t happy, we need progress. The last text he’d received had weighed on his conscience for about a month. It was a call to action and a final warning. Either do the job or we’re coming to take care of it.

A week passed by without anything else and DeSoto thought maybe they were bluffing. Another week passed the same and then another. By the time two months had passed, DeSoto was certain that they’d forgotten about him and Roscoe. There were bigger fish to fry. He’d heard through the grapevine about Bill’s appeal meeting. They’d be busy getting ready for that. Had probably been hoping their fearless leader would be let out and back into the fray. 

That was the last that DeSoto had heard. His New York burner has long gone quiet and now sat in the bottom of one of the drawers in the Tipton. 

It was so far from his mind, that as he made his way to Celia’s flat he didn’t think to keep his defenses up. The New Yorker had made the trek more than a few times already and most stayed out of his path. He liked to call the fact he wore a perpetual scowl his people repellent. 

He was only a block or so from Celia’s apartment when his world went dark. Immediately he swung his fist out, connecting with flesh and hearing a satisfying crack as bone broke beneath his fist. Before he had time to pull back for another blind hit, something connected with his cheek and he felt pain flood through him as an iron taste filled his mouth. It disoriented him enough so that whoever was attacking him could wrestle his hands behind his back and land another blow to his head. He swayed on his feet giving them enough opportunity to shove him into what he assumed was a car. The door slammed shut and soon they were moving.

DeSoto lost track of how many turns they made. They hadn’t taken any care in strapping him and his body rocked back and forth dangerously with each sharp turn and hard brake. 

When the blindfold was finally removed, his face swollen and bloody, he found himself in a building. Probably on the outskirts of town if the fact the building seemed to be falling apart was anything to go by. But that didn’t hold his attention for long. Roscoe was in the opposite corner looking just as bad as DeSoto felt. 

“Aye fuckin’ let ‘im go. S’posed t’be my hit,” he spat, trying to hide the fear that suddenly gripped him and made his blood freeze.

ROSCOE: 

Roscoe didn't know what was going on here - and certainly didn't want to find out but he had enough of an inkling to have a clue. He wasn't stupid, after all. There were only so many reasons a gang of thick mixed New York accented men would be holding him down and threatening him. 

And by so many - of course he meant one; his father. 

He'd run for so long and honestly he should have known that this shit would catch up with him. That DeSoto's refusal to kill him would finally bite them in the ass. The family didn't take no as an answer. Nor did they take refusal lightly. Guess he should have been lucky that they hadn't slit his neck so far but it wasn't much reassurance. Not when he heard the scuffle of resistance and movement outside and felt the cool tip of a gun press to the back of his neck. 

Roscoe knew who the hooded man they dragged in was before they even removed the blindfold - Roscoe immediately swallowing back the fear that formed a lump within his throat. Not good. Not good at all. 

A cold laugh fell from someone behind him, the gun shoving tighter against his neck as he hissed in annoyance at the uncomfortable feeling, his gaze catching his brother's with a subtle raise of his brow - a call to action if he wouldn't have already known it was pointless. 

"You'll do well to remember only to speak when spoken to, asshole." The man purred, gesture something towards the man besides DeSoto, who immediately reacted by kicking the older twin down to the floor - a boot heavily planting itself between his shoulder blades. 

"Hey!" Roscoe growled, pushing against the hands forcing him down and hearing the soft click of the safety that stilled him instantly. "Enough." Someone shouted, an unrecognizable asshole coming to stand between them as he regarded them distastefully. 

"Let's not pretend yous both don't know why you're here. After all - my dear DeSoto, if he is your hit then I beg to wonder why he's still fuckin' here?" 

DESOTO:

It took a moment for his eyes to fully adjust. He’d been solely focused on the fact Roscoe was here too and they were going to kill him. Didn’t matter that Bill had made it DeSoto’s punishment to kill his brother. Because he’d gotten complacent and had half assed his job they were both gonna die. Execution style in a dirty abandoned building. 

Made sense it happened as soon as they both were fucking happy.

A grunt came from him as he was kicked to the floor. At first he struggled against the foot, trying to unbalance the asshole that had him pinned. Apparently there’d been a restructuring of goons in the family. These guys were nothin’ like the idiots he and Roscoe had dealt with before everything went down. Either that or somehow they’d gone soft. An option DeSoto didn’t even want to consider. 

Des’ gaze had been fixed on Roscoe, trying his best to convey some sort of apology while he did his best to come up with a plan to get out of there. It looked hopeless but there’d be a chink in their armor somewhere. They couldn’t be strong and completely put together. They weren’t supposed to be that organized.

“I told yous idiots, I was waiting,” he spat out, glaring at the man that had entered the room.  “The whole point was t’make him think he was safe. Yous fucked that up by rushin’. Now get this asshole off of me.” 

ROSCOE: 

A million things were going through his mind. There was nothing he wanted more than to form some kind of plan that could have gotten them both out of here and away from these fucks but he was coming up blank. Fear tinged briefly in the back of his mind as a shaky breath fell from his lips. He could see the look Des was giving him and honestly it almost only made him more nervous - it made him feel like they were nothing short of fucked.

And perhaps they were. 

"We weren't asking for some elaborate plan. You were to do as yous were told and do it quickly." Roscoe heard the man speak, the tone accompanying his words drawing his brows into a furrow. "I do believe we warned you, did we not? Gave yous one last chance before we came to clean up this mess ourselves?" 

Oh no. DeSoto's job was to kill him, right? So.. If they were here to clean up there was no question that by the end of the night him and Des might be nothing more than discarded bodies in the street. 

"Might we remind yous what happens when you don't do as you're told, DeSoto." The stranger (asshole, Roscoe decided) spoke, only a brief moment before the cool metal disappeared from the back of his neck. Intuition only warned him that was a bad sign seconds before his arms were forced behind his back, that grip on his hair finally dropped in favor of hauling the man lightly to his knees. Roscoe's eyes widened slightly as one do the grunts in the corner moved forward, the sickening sound of metal sliding against concrete as he dragged the end of a metal bat against the floor - positioning himself beside the younger twin, bat lifting to hover cruelly over his abdomen. 

"Care to try explaining your failure again? This time with less bullshit?" Head-Asshole requested, trailing off with a small roll of his hand. "Or else." The words were accented by the pressure of the metal bat against his stomach - not nearly as hard as Roscoe knew it could have been, but still enough to drive a pained shout from his lips as he jerked in the grip holding him up - said grip about the only reason he hadn't doubled over completely. 

DESOTO:

Pure panic raced through him as the asshole between him and Roscoe spoke. The chances of them actually getting out of this relatively okay were slim. There was no way that Roscoe was getting out unharmed. Already he could see the way they beat the shit out of the younger Sykes. He’d be dragging his brother out unconscious most likely. If they didn’t flat out kill them. 

But Des wasn’t sure they’d do that. It was Bill’s decision, anyways, to have DeSoto kill his brother. He was making a point. Punishing Des for being related to Roscoe, for being so close to him. Because there was no denying that Bill was convinced his sons were plotting to take over the business. No matter how angry DeSoto got when the accusation was thrown at him, no matter how many times he denied it.

He needed to think. And quick. What was gonna be the best way to get them both out of this? 

In the span of a few seconds the answer snapped into his mind and he shot a look to Roscoe. Trust me it said because shit was definitely about to get sticky. 

“Quickly,” he scoffed, looking up to the asshole from his spot on the ground. Scowling he shook, making it difficult for the man on his back to stay that way. “Get the fuck off me. Yous forget who the fuck I am? M’Bill’s fuckin’ enforcer. His heir. Yous been working for him for what? A year?” 

He spat at the guy until he was let up enough to at least kneel. There was no way they’d let him up or let him have control of his hands but that was fine. He could work with that.

“It ain’t a failure. After what this asshole did?” He nodded his head towards Roscoe, narrowing his eyes and frowning at the other male. ���Yous don’t think he deserved t’sweat it out? He betrayed all of us. He ruined fuckin’ everything. Bill’s locked up because of him. His fuckin’ flesh and blood. Yous think that deserves the regular rat treatment? Nah. Fuck that.”

ROSCOE: 

For the record? Roscoe fucking hated this. Not that anyone would like being captured, beat up and threatened, of course, but Roscoe hated more than just that. He hated the fact that these assholes held themselves with the belief they had power. That they were sitting here blaming one twin for not killing another and that he had to sit here and listen to all the wrong he'd done all over again. 

Even with DeSoto's subtle look - the one that told him that it wasn't really what he meant, the words still stung. Or… perhaps that was still just the remnants of the bat to his stomach. 

"Is that… so..?" The man's voice all but purred, amusement evident in his tone - the fuck enjoying watching them suffer. Roscoe shifted uncomfortably, not liking the way gazes were drawn to him in a moment of consideration. "I agree." Lead-fucker finally stated with a small clap of his hands, smiling twisting dangerously upon his features. "Fortunately however - we do believe a year has been enough for you to make him squirm. Especially when you switched gears to, as you said 'make him feel safe'." A snap of fingers and once again that bat made contact with his body - not upon his stomach but lower, in the middle of his thighs with a much harder swing. Another yell of pain ripped from his mouth, despite his attempt to bite down on it, the hit repeated once more as Roscoe swallowed back bile. 

It told him something though - they moved to the strongest bone in his body. Moved to bones that were surrounded by layers of fat and muscle to protect them rather than his unprotected organs. They couldn't kill him. Because though the shots were painful (extremely so) they were less so than one to the chest or stomach would be at that power. And yet… they moved, if only because they knew it would kill him otherwise. They were being careful. 

"Come now, DeSoto. The boys and I think you've just gone soft!" A small chorus of instigating laughter followed. "Do you really care about making him suffer? - or do you just care about him?" Roscoe felt himself stiffen as the goon beside him raised the bat - nuzzling it condescendingly against his hair, and he could see the man shoot DeSoto a look. A challenge. 

And in that moment… Roscoe thought he might've been wrong about the not killing thing. 

DESOTO:

The funny thing about this was that a few years ago DeSoto wouldn’t have given beating the shit out of Roscoe a second thought. Hell, he’d done so a few months ago. There had been so much anger and sadness in him over everything it had been easy. The asshole holding onto Roscoe now could have given the bat and he would have gladly taken it and taken a few swings at him.

Now though?

Now the thought made his stomach turn. Bile rose in his throat but he swallowed it back. It was clear now that there was no way they were getting out of there in one piece. His goal now was to get Roscoe out of there alive. Something that looked nearly impossible now as the handle of the bat was shoved in his face. 

“Fuck off. He’s my brother. Course I fuckin’ care about him. I ain’t fuckin’ heartless.” He spat the words at the chooch as he yanked the bat from his hands. “Which means yous questionin’ my loyalty to the fuckin’ family. Who was Bill’s second? Not any’a you fucks. He called all of yous in t’handle me. Ever wonder why he needed more than one?” 

A scoff fell from his lips as he looked at his brother, a decision solidifying itself in his mind. Jesus this was gonna fuckin’ suck. But it was their best option. In one fluid moment he swung the bat, half heartedly, knocking Roscoe in the stomach. He felt the blow in his own stomach, wanting to double over in response. The blow was followed by his fist connecting with Roscoe’s cheek before Des dropped to his knees. 

A hand went to Roscoe’s hair, tugging it harshly as he brought their heads close together. “When I tell yous, duck,” he whispered it as if he was sayin’ his final words to his brother before shoving him away with a frown and standing back up.

“Yous gonna keep questioning my loyalty or yous gonna let me fuckin’ finish this the right way?”

ROSCOE: 

This was gonna blow. That was all he could think as he watched DeSoto speak towards the idiots within the room. None of them looked intimidating by his brothers words and worse off that expression of amusement was still planted on the man in the middle. They were practically just toying with them - pushing and prodding and seeing how far they could go. 

Roscoe swallowed nervously as Des accepted the bat into his hands - it happened before he could even think about it. The apprehension dotting a cool sweat across his brow. Yeah, this was definitely going to blow. 

Roscoe felt his teeth bite down hard into flesh as the bat connected with his stomach once more, trying his damnedest not to make a sound of pain at his brother's action - if only for DeSoto's sake. However the quick cut across his jaw caught him off guard and he knew he'd split his lip with his tooth the second he'd gotten his bearings back about him. The urge to spit the warm blood within his mouth only prevented by the quick and harsh pull at his hair. 

When I tell yous, duck. 

"Fuck yous." He spat quickly in response, letting his head drop down as soon it was free of his brother's iron grip. For their credit - the display seemed natural and none of the men suspected that he'd been told anything more than a whispered threat or last right. Or if they did, they certainly didn't show it - instead offering a few scoffs and growing smirks. 

"Very well. If you so insist, DeSoto. Feel free to show us all the right way to finish this. Please." Roscoe heard the man say, the younger brothers gaze slipping up in an attempt to count the pairs of legs surrounding them. Since… Roscoe had an inkling of what Des might've been planning and… it certainly wasn't going to be subtle at this rate. 

They needed a plan. A plan that included getting the hell out of this situation or to die trying. In order to avoid the latter, they needed to be ready. Blood dripped off his chin, accumulating easily below him as his eyes swept what he could see. Head fuck face. Guy holding his arms. Guy who'd had the bat. Guy who'd been holding Des down. Guy who'd been standing watch beside DeSoto. Five guys. At least. He couldn't see behind him. One gun for sure. 

Two experienced, gang trained, street wise scrappers on their side. Well… - Roscoe shifted in his spot if only to test his mobility, a blinding white pain shooting up his back almost immediately as a grunt sounded between clenched teeth. Great. Make that one scrapper. He was going to be goddamn useless but… Fuck they didn't have a choice. 

… Man - they were so goddamn screwed - and Roscoe supposed he was just going to have to take the option of die trying. 

DESOTO:

These fucks were taunting him. Egging him on. They didn’t know how destructive DeSoto Sykes could be. Didn’t realize the time bomb they were working with. There was a reason DeSoto and Roscoe had been enforcers. Why Roscoe, the smarter of the twins, was paired with his brother. There was a monster that lurked just beneath the surface of DeSoto’s exterior. A dangerous, unnamed creature that reared its ugly head whenever DeSoto’s anger got uncontrollable.

That beast was restless as he watched the men around them. They were cocky, amused. They honestly thought this mission they were on was going to be simple. That they’d be able to take down The Boss’ sons. It pissed DeSoto off more than he could even put into words. The sheer ignorance. The lack of respect.

He growled as he stalked forward, ripping the gun from the other man’s hands. Fucking prick. The oldest Sykes would save him for last. He’d see him crying and pissing his pants before he finished him off; a warning to the rest of the dumbasses back home who thought they could come after them.

Easily he moved to stand behind Roscoe, a cold gleam in his eyes, and positioned the gun. It was scary how naturally the stance came back to him but expected. How many others had been put in the exact same position by him? Taking a breath he cocked the gun and counted. Each man looked on expectantly, waiting for the gun to sound. 

“Duck.”

Before Roscoe had a chance to complete the action DeSoto shot the gun, aiming for the idiot that’d been holding him down. Before the body hit the floor the gun was dropped to Roscoe and DeSoto sprang forward, body colliding with the ring leader. Darkness took over then as his fists collided over and over with the asshole’s face.

ROSCOE: 

Roscoe wasn't going to pretend that he wasn't scared. Even though he knew that DeSoto wasn't going to kill him, he still felt his blood turn to ice in his veins as his brother moved to stand behind him. It only served to remind him of how close this had been to a reality. Of how many times this entire situation crossed his mind in a nightmare. 

His breath even stilled as the gun clocked behind him - drawing out that last bit of courage as he found himself silently praying regardless. He never knew if Des would change his mind in that moment - to remember how much of his life had been fucked up all because of him. 

Duck. 

Roscoe moved before he even fully processed the word, his hands pulled back around to his front as he dropped forward with a sharp pain in his abdomen. Seconds were precious - and the room erupted into chaos within a moment. He heard the clatter of the gun beside him, a hand reaching out to grab it as he used most of his will to flip himself onto his back. 

A shot was fired off - hitting the man who'd been holding him in the chest and dropping him immediately. Before he could get the second round off however, a body was on top of him - a knee landing heavily on his hip as a hand tried to shove the gun away. Ros tried his best to bring his own knee up to topple his opponent quickly before more damage could be done, but he'd still felt the cold slice of a knife against his skin before he'd managed to get the gun situated back under his attacker. 

The report of the pistol felt deafening in his already ringing ears, the splatter of blood from the other man coating him like mist on a summer morning before his body was shoved aside like a ragdoll. 

Trying to waste no time - two more shots rang out, both barely hitting their mark on the goons on their way to stop the brawl between his brother and the man in charge. They weren't fatal - he was sure. But…incapacitated was more than enough for him right now. It was only when he didn't see them move to get up  that the pistol finally dropped from his weakening grip, a pained groan slipping through his lips as his hand instead moved to clutch his abdomen, gaze trying to focus across the room towards his brother - hoping and praying that he was winning his own battles and that he hadn't miscounted the number of guys present. 

He didn't have the strength or will to pick that gun back up if he had.  

DESOTO:

In any other situation, the sound of gunshots would be jarring. In any other situation, however, DeSoto wouldn’t be brawling with an assailant. He’d be by his brother’s side firing his own weapon. But as it was, DeSoto didn’t even hear the gunshots. His rage had taken over and all he could focus on was the guy beneath him. The fucker needed to pay for what he did. And it was DeSoto’s job to ensure he paid. 

All around him was the sound of flesh on flesh. His fists were bloody. Though, he wasn’t sure if that blood was his own or the other guys. It didn’t matter to Des. He hadn’t heard the crunch that he wanted; didn’t feel the asshole stop moving beneath him. That was wait he was waiting for. Why he kept hitting the so called ring leader of this little group. 

A large part of the darkness wanted to treat him how he’d treated Roscoe and DeSoto. It wanted to leave him bloodied and bruised on the floor waiting for death. Only DeSoto would draw it out. This man would wait hours, days, weeks before he got that sweet release. And his death would be painful. It was easy to conjure up different scenarios of how it would go. Each one was more painful than the last and it left a large grin on the Italian’s face as he continued to beat on the man

Finally, with arms that felt like they were made of leaf, DeSoto got the confirmation he wanted. There was one deafening crunch as the man beneath him went limp. Not quite ready to believe the man was dead, Des pinched what was left of his caved in nose and waited for the man to take a gasping breath. When it didn’t come, he peeled himself away from the corpse beneath him. 

Immediately his eyes scanned the room, taking in the bodies strewn around it. Roscoe had killed most while Des had worked the leader over. Later he’d come back and collect personal tokens to send home to New York. The rest he’d burn and dispose of once they were in the clear. 

It was then that his attention turned to his barely conscious brother. “Roe,” his voice sounded like gravel as he stopped down to the younger man. He was pale. A pale they’d never really been. And Des could see the puddle of red seeping from him. Panic kicked in then, pushing the darkness back into its corner, as he shifted to hoist his brother up. “Fuck. Hold on. Fuckin’ hold on.” 

ROSCOE: 

Roscoe could feel the pounding in his ears - his heartbeat a quick and almost unsteady drum that drilled relentlessly into his head. The pain seemed to throb in time with it, growing and shrinking every second as he curled lightly into himself. 

To say he felt like shit would be an understatement - shit not even beginning to cover the way in which his body seemed to be hurting around him. 

A groan served as his brother's only answer to the soft call of his name (or maybe it was loud, he couldn't tell above his heart beat). As long as DeSoto gave him a few moments to gather his bearings he'd be fine… everything would be fine and they could just go home and laugh about this later. 

"—Eugh" Came the pained sound of irritation at being jostled, a hiss slipping from his lips as he leaned heavily into his brother's shoulder. ".. —m'okay, s'okay." He tried to reassure him, his tone only a little garbled, as he tried to press himself up into a proper stand. He didn't realize however how much of a daunting task that was really going to be - every movement tweaking a new flare of pain and a fresh wave of nausea. 

Hand once again found its way towards his stomach, curling tightly along his abdomen as he stumbled in his brother's grip. Shaky fingers pulled at the fabric of his shirt lifting it just enough as his gaze fell to look at the skin resting beneath. It took him far too long to focus, eyes narrowing for far too long before he realized his vision wasn't that fucked up - the skin was just dark red from bruising and… - well actually that wasn't the color of bruising at all. 

"F-f… Fuck. S'not good."

DESOTO:

Adrenaline continued to course through DeSoto’s veins. The darkness was receding but it still lingered on the edges of his vision. It wanted to keep him fighting, to find another person worthy of his anger, but rationality was sinking back in. The need to take care of his brother emerging with each weak word from Roscoe. 

His eyes zeroed in on the skin Roscoe was showing. Fuck. It wasn’t good. There wasn’t going to be getting this patched up at the hotel. They’d have to go to the hospital and that was gonna be enough trouble. Now there were going to be questions. They’d probably want to have the police called in to find out what happened. It was ingrained in them to avoid the fuzz. It only led to more trouble in cases like this.

But— his brother was bleeding out and looking worse each passing second.

“S’fine you stupid fuck,” he huffed, hoisting him up further. They needed to figure out where the fuck they were. How far they were from the fuckin’ hospital. He had a gut feeling that they didn’t have too long. Limping under his own slight injuries and Roscoe’s weight, DeSoto cursed when he got outside and saw where they were at. Too fuckin far from town to make it walking. Ros would be dead before they even got halfway there.

Thankfully, though, Des spotted the vans they’d arrived in. Hobbling over, he tossed Roscoe inside before rushing to the other side and starting it up. “Just fuckin’ stay awake, asshole. Yous ain’t allowed t’die on me.”

ROSCOE: 

Fingers curled tightly into DeSoto's shirt as the man shuffled him up, opposite dropping his shirt back down as his arm wrapped back around his waist. A pained hiss slipped out as he stuttered in his steps again, every movement of his legs just burning at his bones. He had to count himself lucky that his legs weren't broken at least. That he still had some of his wits about him. 

Though slowly but surely that was waning too. 

Doing his best to assist his brother rather than forcing him to deal with his dead weight, Roscoe positioned himself into the van (where this van came from?? He hadn't a goddamn clue) and let his head fall against the window. Now that the present danger was taken care of, he could feel his body slowly coming back to itself - that adrenaline that had rushed his veins, flooding out and replacing numbness with sharp agonizing pain, stiff soreness and more than enough regret to keep him content for years. 

"I'm alright." He tried to say in response to his brother's aggressive concern but the words caught in his throat - a cough stifling them immediately. His chest felt like it was on fire, the tension curling in his stomach and nearly forcing bile into his throat. Gaze caught the small spatter of fresh blood upon his fist and honestly? He couldn't tell if that had simply originated from his split lip or was the source of a far greater problem. 

".... —c-call Rita." Roscoe choked out minutes after he'd gone quiet, the fear starting to find a grip on his consciousness as he felt darkness clawing at his mind. Fighting for control as Ros desperately tried to ignore it, to listen to DeSoto's words. It was only when he felt seconds from blacking out that he jammed his hand against the knife wound in his side - the sudden flare of pain waking his senses as a growled curse of pain fell from him. It sure wasn't fucking ideal but… He needed to stay awake. 

He needed to live. 

DESOTO:

Every few seconds DeSoto’s eyes drifted from the road to his brother. Even though their fight was over, the adrenaline didn’t leave him. Wouldn’t until he was alone and he knew his brother was safe. Or at least being taken care of by qualified people. And even then he didn’t think he’d be able to calm himself. They’d been attacked without warning because they’d let their guards down. Things would have to change. Things would have to be like they were in New York again. But instead of protecting their father, they’d be protecting the people they’d become close to here. 

Already DeSoto knew he’d be calling in favors from those he’d met over the years. He’d make sure they weren’t attacked again. The next time New York tried to come here they’d know the second they took off.

Roscoe’s voice brought him out of his thoughts. Rita. Course he wanted her called. It’d be good, though. She could stay with Roscoe while he went out and took care of their protection. He didn’t like the woman but she could serve a purpose. 

He waited until the groaning stopped, an affirmation from his brother given, before he called the woman. “Shut up. Get to the hospital. Shut up. I’ll tell you when I get there.” Before the woman had a chance to start that high pitched whining again DeSoto hung up and tossed the phone towards the back. He’d have to get a new one. Hell, they’d all have to get new ones. The last thing they needed was to be tracked. 

Tires screeched to a halt as DeSoto finally pulled the van in front of the hospital. Running in, he wasted no time screaming at the people in the front. They gave him worried looks but he waved them off with threats. “Get my brother. Now.”

#c: DeSoto #x; Wayward Sons #tw violence #tw knives #tw injury #tw blood #p: The Man Comes Around

[stvrwar]

wait out the plastic weather

marauders social media au | 2k words | they’re youtubers bc why not and bc @frxddi is up this trope’s ass | ao3

james potter to tucci gang: you guys see the newest vid

sirius black: you mean the newest video that all of us are fucking in

sirius black: that cideo?

sirius black: *video

remus lupin: the video you uploaded and sent all of us the link to like…twelve minutes ago?

peter pettigrew: I think he might mean that video

james potter: fuck all of you not that video

james potter: and it has a name. it is out cHILD

remus lupin: pardon me, I didn’t realize “getting kicked out of Walmart #4” fit on the birth certificate

james potter: I have small handwriting

remus lupin: my mistake

james potter: ur mistake indeed but

james potter: not our fucking video morons

peter pettigrew: ur unnecessarily mean to us

james potter: lily evans video. The woman of my dreams. The greatest youtuber to ever fucking live

sirius black: now that’s just hurtful

remus lupin: and also why the fuck would we have watched her video?

james potter: now who’s hurtful?

-

remus lupin to so pete davidson and ariana grande are engaged and idk who I am anymore: sirius why is this our chat name now

sirius black: bc idk who I am anymore

peter pettigrew: is it bc ur in love with ariana grande

james potter: he loves ariana and he’s in love with pete

remus lupin: I can’t believe you’ve never told us

peter pettigrew: im touched

remus lupin: when’s the wedding?

sirius black: okay fuck all of u she is an icon and he is hilarious

james potter: ur face is hilarious

sirius black: im leaving you for him

james potter: babe no I didn’t mean it

sirius black: u’ve hurt me too many times

james potter: I promise I’ll change for you

remus lupin removed sirius black from the chat

remus lupin removed james potter from the chat

peter pettigrew: this happens like twice a fucking week

remus lupin: so how’ve you been pete?

peter pettigrew: pretty shook about that engagement tbh

remus lupin removed peter pettigrew from the chat

remus lupin: I am an island.

-

sirius black to the office season 2 episode 7: yo Walmart 4 is on trending wtf

james potter: !!!!!!!!!

peter pettigrew: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

remus lupin: im not gonna do that

sirius black: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

james potter: what number is it on trending??? Is this twitter or youtube btw

sirius black: youtube and #6

remus lupin: shit that’s our best yet

peter pettigrew: anyone check the subscriber count recently????

sirius black: the marauders are at 3.1 million what the FUCK IS UP YO

remus lupin: im so surprised u aren’t key smashing

sirius black: is it because im gay

remus lupin: no it’s because u have massive thumbs and can’t text to save your life

remus lupin: yes because you’re gay

sirius black: that’s homophobic. Im not gay bc I keysmash

peter pettigrew: ??? neither of you are straight. ????

remus lupin: no you keysmash bc you’re gay

james potter: WE ARE TRENDING WE CAN ARGUE ABOUT THIS LATER

james potter changed chat name to BRAINSTORMING SESSION ASAP

sirus black: porn

james potter removed sirius black from the chat

peter pettigrew: tasteful porn so we don’t get demonetized

james potter: keep talking

-

james potter to twinky winky is a great porn parody title why are you booing me: aquarium vid is a goooooooooooo

remus lupin: but the question is, can we live up to Walmart 4 hype

remus lupin: bc that shit is going insane online. People love it

remus lupin: we’re hoodlums, vandals

sirius lupin: loveable vandals and hoodlums

peter pettigrew: I feel like that’s debatable tbh

remus lupin: we as a collective whole have been kicked out of four separate walmarts

remus lupin: do you know how far I have to drive to get my fried chicken at 2 am

james potter: why the fuck are you getting fried chicken at 2 am

remus lupin: I don’t need this judgement

sirius black: so how’s the aquarium vid faring

peter pettigrew: u know what sirius is being the rational one for once and im too focused on the fried chicken to be amazed

remus lupin left twinky winky is a great porn parody title why are you booing me

peter pettigrew changed the chat name to colonel lupin’s fried chicken

sirius black: is it really that rare that im the rational one?

sirius black: jk ik im a messy bitch

-

peter pettigrew to three’s company: uh. Guys has james seen this yet

peter pettigrew sent an image

remus lupin: oh fuck

sirius black: well I haven’t heard any high pitched screeching yet so, no

peter pettigrew: she’s got more subscribers than we do, it would be good for the channel

sirius black: she’s a video game streamer what sorta collab are we supposed to do with that

remus lupin: idk, maybe a vid on her channel, a vid on ours? She’s in the same city so like, shouldn’t be too hard, right?

sirius black: welp he’s screaming so he definitely has seen the comment now.

-

james potter to chad and ryan were gay fuck you disney: “hey we should totally do a collab sometime! Message me :)”

sirius black: u have sent that TWELVE FUCKING TIMES NOW

sirius black: TWELVE

remus lupin: let the boy live

peter pettigrew: okay but the smiling is a little concerning tbh

remus lupin: @james potter have you even sent the fucked message yet? What did it say?

james potter: “hey! I’m so excited that you wanted to do a collab with us! I love your channel and doing something would be super great for both of us. Anything you had in mind?”

james potter: did I come off as a crazy person?

sirius black: in the best way possible

remus lupin: somehow that doesn’t feel like a compliment?

peter pettigrew: maybe you should use MORE exclamation points

james potter: stfu I am an expert at talking to the most beautiful woman in the world

sirius black: excuse me

james potter: I said woman

sirius black: tell me im pretty

-

james potter to little pig boy comes from the dirt: fuck gotta clean this shit up

james potter changed chat name to the marauders group chat

sirus black: ??????????????? wtf

remus lupin: has james been bodyswapped

peter pettigrew: like the movie face/off with nic cage?

remus lupin: I feel like there are better examples of body swapping

james potter added lily evans to the marauders group chat

sirius black: oh fuck now that makes sense

remus lupin changed chat name to little pig boy comes from the dirt

lily evans: from that SNL skit?

lily evans: I fucking love pete davidson tbh even though he breaks in like every skit

lily evans: did you guys hear that he and ariana got engaged? Idk who I’m more jealous of

sirius black removed james potter from the chat

sirius black: she’s our new james

-

peter pettigrew to owen wilson saying yeah for 2 hrs: drink every time someone comments about sirius’s appearance on a vid

james potter: “im a simple girl. I see sirius, I click.”

remus lupin: the words that will haunt my nightmare

james potter: the comments on the drag trying vid are…bonkers

peter pettigrew: who even says bonkers

lily evans: wow okay some of these commenters are…creative

james potter: by creative, do you mean terrifying?

lily evans: yes yes I do

remus lupin: I don’t even get it. He’s not that great looking?

sirius black: okay fuck you, u trick ass hoe

remus lupin: like, you cannot be everyone’s type

sirus black: trick ass hoe

remus lupin: im just being rational. You’re also like out. So who is thinking that saying they wanna have your babies is valid

lily evans: surrogacy?

peter pettigrew: sperm donation?

james potter: adoption?

remus lupin: fuck all of you individually and as a unit

sirius black: trick ass hoe

-

lily evans to shake shake shake senora: okay just posted my collab vid let’s see how this goes

james potter: what did u end up calling it?

lily evans: “i teach 4 idiots how to play overwatch”

sirius black: harsh but fair

remus lupin: we didn’t do that badly

peter pettigrew: remus die with dignity we did fucking awful

james potter: idk what it meant when lily kept calling me a hanzo main and laughing but it felt hurtful

lily evans: good. It was.

-

remus lupin to three rings to rule them all: so has james seen that people are shipping him and lily yet

remus lupin: because we should NOt let him know about that

peter pettigrew: he’d fucking cry

sirius black: theyd be called lames

sirius black: ha

-

sirius black to james potter: dude you gotta stop staring at lily when she comes over for pizza nights

sirius black: she’s gonna notice

sirius black: or like stop pretending that she isn’t noticing

james potter: wait you think she’s noticed

sirius black: christ you dumbass

-

lily evans to marlene mckinnon: you seen my newest collab with the marauders

marlene mckinnon: we’re roommates, obvi

marlene mckinnon: did u steal my lipstick

lily evans: okay but like. The comments

lily evans: …………………………………..what of it

marlene mckinnon: gonna kill u evans <3

marlene mckinnon: okay wow they really want u to get all up on glasses

lily evans: that one’s potter

marlene mckinnon: they want u to climb him like a tree

marlene mckinnon: do the horizontal tango

marlene mckinnon: netflix and chill

lily evans: these are getting less clever

marlene mckinnon: suck his dick

-

peter pettigrew to wwlbd (what would leonard bernstein do): uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh guys we are on tv

peter pettigrew: TV LIKE WE ARE ON FUCKIN TV

peter pettigrew: TELEVISION

sirius black: what

james potter: what

remus lupin: what

peter pettigrew: OKAY like not us but like. Our video. Walmart #4

remus lupin: great now everyone’s gonna know we’re fucking vandals

james potter: im fucking crying

sirius black: IM FUCKING CRYING

peter pettigrew: oh shit now it’s the video with @Lily Evans

peter pettigrew: we are being called charming and loveable with an “adoring” fanbase

lily evans: oh my god??????????? How’d you (we) even end up on tv

peter pettigrew: idfk! Some like...social media segment or something

-

sirius black to smonk wed: settle a bet for me

remus lupin: christ here we go

sirius black: I don’t appreciate the tone

remus lupin: christ! Here we go!

sirius black: whatver, acceptable, james wants to bone lily

remus lupin: uh

peter pettigrew: that be known

remus lupin: u know this isn’t the three man chat right

lily evans: uh

james potter removed sirius black from the chat

-

peter pettigrew to remus owes me like $20 and some triscuits: who ate all my freezy pops

sirius black: who the fuck calls them freezy pops

remus lupin: who let you back into any of the chats

sirius black: fuk u m8

james potter: he was crying so i let him back in

sirius black: and lily isn’t in this chat so i can say all the shit i want

james potter: i wish u wouldn’t

remus lupin: seconded

peter pettigrew removed sirius black from the chat

james potter: problem solved! peter pettigrew: okay but who ate my freezy pops

-

lily evan to james potter: so are we going to talk about it

james potter: about what precisely

lily evans: the revolution of the moon and the fact it’s made of cheese?

james potter: ah yes, it’s swiss btw

lily evans: the moon?

james potter: clearly

-

COMMENTS ON “THE MARAUDERS TRY DRAG FT. LILY EVANS (EVANSLY)

Chaitea7: oh my god why the fuck is sirius so pretty im jealous wtf

Janeyloo: okay but anybody else picking up on the tension between james and the redhead??

                  VIEW REPLIES

                            4marauderssssss: @Janeyloo that’s lily evans, she’s                                        another youtuber and she’s fucking great

                            dva-main3: they are definitely a thing, i agree

                            greektragdy: okay but does this make their ship name                                       lames? LIMES?

thomasthetrainbdsm: is wormtail ever gonna make another appearance? I love that funky little rat

dwightkshroooot: okay but why isn’t lily actually a like...try vlogger like these guys? she outdid sirius which is like. Unheard of.

                  VIEW REPLIES

                             dianaprinces234: like i never thought id see the day

                             yalldve: she looks so good wtf im shook

dhfakjshdgljdsl: i want lily evans to step on me and i would                              say thank you

                  VIEW REPLIES

                             honeynutcheetos: p sure james thinks the same thing lmao

                             011000110110000101110100: lmao right???? Im so gay

                            TheMarauders: I definitely think the same thing -James                                     Potter

#harry potter #jily #Marauders #jily fic #jily group chat #harry potter fic #james potter #lily evans #sirius black #remus lupin #peter pettigrew #jily social media #marauders social media #my fic

[simblrbreezycakes]

i was tagged by @chippedcupanddustybooks sweet bb. i am tagging @irrelephantsims @magnoliidae @simplymelaninated and anyone who hasn’t been tagged i swear i feel like the last person doing this LOL. heckin long ass questionnaire under the cut.

1. What is your full name? Brianna Leigh [Redacted] 2. What is your nickname? Breezy 3. Birthday? may 4th 4. What is your favorite book series? hmmmm series? idk.... i really like every single john grisham book and they aren’t related but when you have such a niche brand of book i feel like it counts lol.  5. Do you believe in aliens or ghosts? kinda on both. 6. Who is your favorite author? oh whew. tough one right here. idk man, i have a few? but if i had to choose i guezz i would say george orwell.   7. What is your favorite radio station? who tf listens to the radio like det anymore lmfao. i don’t have one. before i listened to 107.1 in memphis in the car sometimes, but i moved so. 8. What is your favorite flavor of anything? i loveeee pineapple anything. 9. What word would you use often to describe something great or wonderful? lit 10. What is your current favorite song? currently really into pink in the night by mitski and also sicko mode by travis scott.

11. What is your favorite word? good ole fuck(in/ed/etc.) i also really like voluptuous and bubbles. 12. What was the last song you listened to? last thing i listened to was another lifetime x nao.  13. What TV show would you recommend for everybody to watch? absolutely check out the good place. also hilda, the dragon prince, she-ra princess of power, criminal minds, law and order (the original), and snapped. 14. What is your favorite movie to watch when you’re feeling down? i used to watch the notebook religiously when it rained/felt upset like shit. but lately i’ve been watching say yes to the dress to combat my depression lol. 15. Do you play video games? yah 16. What is your biggest fear? dying alone and no one finding me. like literally alone not like meta alone “oh no one loves me” like dead ass alone somewhere isolated. 17. What is your best quality, in your opinion? hmmmmm idk that i care a lot about other people? 18. What is your worst quality, in your opinion? all of them lmfao. i’m annoying, i’m physically unattractive, i talk too damn much, i can be kind of a bitch both intentionally and unintentionally, i’m a trash writer, i can be selfish, and i self depreciate a lot (lol see above response “all of them”) and i’m sure that gets on people who love and care about me’s nerves ((but like....i mean it lmfao)) 19. Do you like cats or dogs better? whew tough. prolly cats though.  20. What is your favorite season? winter followed by a tie between spring and fall.  21. Are you in a relationship? nah lmfao.  22. What is something you miss from your childhood? not being so fuckin ugly and depressed lmfao. 23. Who is your best friend? “my person” as greys anatomy stans would say is ivy lynn [redacted] [redacted] but i also wanna shout out my home girl mary (i know you follow me on here), my home girl christina (also follows me on here but she never checks her simblr anymore), my smoothie gang bitches, my NSA bitches (which includes both ivy and mary lmfao), and my memphis as fuck family. honorable mention to loml [redacted] who is skating on thin fucking ice with me right now lmfao. 24. What is your eye color? brown 25. What is your hair color? brown 26. Who is someone you love? don’t make me answer this tumblr gods. 27. Who is someone you trust? all my best friends, my parents, my brother. 28. Who is someone you think about often? fucking murder me @ this question lmfao. my friend kate (RIP) my grandmother grannypeg (RIP) and [redacted] 29. Are you currently excited about/for something? i’m excited to spend christmas in a new country! forging new traditions and all that. 30. What is your biggest obsession? currently i’m obsessed with wedding stuff and mens fashion and how mens fashion such as suits translates into womens fashion. we love a hot lady in a tailored suit amiright? 31. What was your favorite TV show as a child? spongebob squarepants RIP :”( 32. Who of the opposite gender can you tell anything to, if anyone? [redacted] 33. Are you superstitious? kinda i guess? not really about stuff like stepping on cracks breaking mamas’ backs or opening umbrellas indoors but little things about familial traditions. 34. Do you have any unusual phobias? not really a phobia but i have misophonia. i also hate eye shit. like eye violence or anything fuckin around with eyes is a big no from me dawg. 35. Do you prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it? absolutely behind the camera. i used to be a theater kid so like being on stage i don’t mind but when it comes to the spotlight and being filmed??? no no no no no. lemme be a cinnamontawgrowfur all day.  36. What is your favorite hobby? watching movies, playing skyrim (I MISS IT SO MUCH), reading, watching music videos, modern calligraphy/hand lettering, baking (ALSO MISS IT MUCH) 37. What was the last book you read? lol a textbook about developing countries.

38. What was the last movie you watched? i just rewatched the swan princess the other day but in terms of watching something brand new i think it was this tom cruise movie my friend showed us and i thought she said someone else ( i don’t remember now. maybe tom hanks?) it was pretty good he was irish or sum with nicole kidman and they came to the united states and pretended to be siblings but the sexual tension was so fucking high dawg. 

39. What musical instruments do you play, if any? nothing i’m wack and a disappointment to my musically gifted family (my dad and brother)  40. What is your favorite animal?  polar bears followed by giraffes. 41. What are your top 5 favorite Tumblr blogs that you follow? i’m gonna go with my main tumblr because ion wanna hurt nobody’s feelings but i follow a celebs of color page i really love, a fashion page i really love, and a few artists i really love. 42. What superpower do you wish you had? teleportation or shape shifting.  43. When and where do you feel most at peace?  i feel most at peace when it is raining and i’m in my room, everything is clean and tidy, candles are lit, i have nothing to do so the world is my oyster, i have a nice cup of coffee or hot cocoa or tea, and i just am v i b i n g.  44. What makes you smile? seeing my friends, my brother (when he isn’t pissing me off), funny videos of red dead people falling off their horse in cinematic mode, pretty flowers, cute art, round birds. 45. What sports do you play, if any? i don’t lmfao. 46. What is your favorite drink? honestly a frozen margarita no salt. 47. When was the last time you wrote a hand-written letter or note to somebody? a month ago.  48. Are you afraid of heights? absolutely. 49. What is your biggest pet peeve? people chewing with their mouths open and people talking to me like i’m incompetent/assuming i don’t know anything about what they’re trying to talk to me about especially if it is my area of expertise lol. 50. Have you ever been to a concert? hail yeah. many. 51. Are you vegan/vegetarian? nope! 52. When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up? honestly i don’t know but i have a distinct memory of a bunch of girls in my second grade, yours truly included, wanting to be strippers. and i don’t know why or how this came up or if we even truly knew what stripping meant but. yeah. OH i guess around the time i was in 4th/5th grade i started wanting to be a harvard law graduate and be a lawyer but i gave that up in like high school and then bounced being a lawyer back and forth in my noggin up until i applied for grad school. shout out to my mary for doing it though.  53. What fictional world would you like to live in? hmmmm idk. none of em really. 54. What is something you worry about? if i made the right decision(s) in life lol.  55. Are you scared of the dark? not really.  56. Do you like to sing? yeah i do! doesn’t mean i’m good at it though haha. 57. Have you ever skipped school? yeah lmfao. 58. What is your favorite place on the planet? i miss Rwanda a lot. but honestly my favorite place is wherever the people i love are. my family loves to travel so whenever i’m with someone i love sharing an experience? i’m in heaven. 59. Where would you like to live? idk anywhere i guess. somewhere it is mostly cold most of the time though haha. 60. Do you have any pets? my bb boi fred lives with my dad and my mom has a dog and 2 cats. we used to have 3 but one of em ran away when she moved to her house, we caught him, he ran away again. oh whale. 61. Are you more of an early bird or a night owl? oh a big time night owl. big time. 62. Do you like sunrises or sunsets better? honestly i like sunrises better but i am never awake to catch em hahah. 63. Do you know how to drive? yah and i fuckin love doing it. 64. Do you prefer earbuds or headphones? i prefer headphones. like really quality ones too. but i tend to use earbuds more often because i don’t need quality while im working out or going to class just easy grab and go. 65. Have you ever had braces? nope but i used to want some so bad. 66. What is your favorite genre of music? i love rap, dream-y pop music and dream-y rap music, i love 80s music. all 80s music really lmfao.  67. Who is your hero? mi mum and mi dad. also viola davis queen of inventing acting and every single color in the rainbow. 68. Do you read comic books? kind of. i was trying to build up a collection before i moved but i only had my BP comics. 69. What makes you the most angry? injustice and offensive ass content and behaviors. also don’t fuck with my friends. i got two dudes on my shit list right now that it is *on sight* if i ever see them again. 70. Do you prefer to read on an electronic device or with a real book? a real book all the way. idk what it is about digital reading my brain shuts the fuck down. i am super fast reader but the second i try and read something digitally it takes me maybe like 10-15 min to get through just a few sentences. 71. What is your favorite subject in school? history lol i was a history major. 72. Do you have any siblings? yeah my chicken nugget puppy brother dylan. asshole. 73. What was the last thing you bought? some historical romance i think? it’s in dutch so idrk.  74. How tall are you? 5′7 i think. 75. Can you cook? yeah i love cooking but saddly don’t do much of it. 76. What are three things that you love? my teddy bear my momma got me for valentines day, my st. agatha figurine, and my yikes tapestry mary got me. i realize now after reading the next question you probably meant like shit in general so. the smell of a fresh cup of coffee, snuggly warm sweaters, postcards and tiny gifts from friends. you know the ones “i just got this for you because i thought you’d like it” 77. What are three things that you hate? funky ass attitudes, the smell and feel of lavender oil, corn. 78. Do you have more female friends or more male friends? female 79. What is your sexual orientation? i’m a big ole heterosexual. sorry to disappoint :/  80. Where do you currently live? the netherlands. 81. Who was the last person you texted? my friend and former roommate. today is her birthday. 82. When was the last time you cried? like an hour ago lmfao. 83. Who is your favorite YouTuber? i don’t have one haha. vevo i guess. 84. Do you like to take selfies? do i like taking them? not really. it takes me too damn long to get one that looks good enough. i like sending stupid selfies to friends though. 85. What is your favorite app? i use twitter probably the most but my favorite app is my spider solitaire game haha. 86. What is your relationship with your parent(s) like? we are very close. i would say both of my parents are my biggest supporters and cheerleaders but how they do that looks a bit different. my mom and i are very similar but sometimes how we handle certain things is very different so we can be the best of friends one day and the completely butt heads the next. 87. What is your favorite foreign accent? i loovveeeee a scottish accent and an irish accent. also tbrh i love a good southern boy drawl. like idk if i could play for you all the way this one dude who works with my mom talks? i would because i wanna bottle it and listen to it whenever i feel bad. 88. What is a place that you’ve never been to, but you want to visit? i would really like to go to norway for my birthday. 89. What is your favorite number? i don’t have one. 90. Can you juggle? nope but i did try and learn i have a video of it somewhere lmfao. 91. Are you religious? kind of. i’m more spiritual than religious and lowkey hate saying that because it sounds so hoitietoitie but it’s true. 92. Do you find outer space or the deep ocean to be more interesting? the ocean. so much of it we haven’t explored. thinking about space makes me feel existential and dead inside.  93. Do you consider yourself to be a daredevil? nah haha 94. Are you allergic to anything? yeah i’m supposed to take one claritin a day but like i don’t. 95. Can you curl your tongue? yeah 96. Can you wiggle your ears? nope :(  97. How often do you admit that you were wrong about something? i’ll admit i’m wrong if i’m actually wrong but you’re gonna have to a helluva lot of convincing to get me there lmfao. though if my being “wrong” has caused harm to someone else i’ll apologize quicker than lightning because the last thing i would want is for my stubbornness to hurt someone i love. 98. Do you prefer the forest or the beach? um the mountains 99. What is your favorite piece of advice that anyone has ever given you? "never turn down a date. you never know who you might meet while you’re out” -my grandmother to my mother to me. 100. Are you a good liar? lmfaooooo i am a reformed liar. 101. What is your Hogwarts House? HUFFLEPUFF BAYBEEE 102. Do you talk to yourself? yah 103. Are you an introvert or an extrovert? an introvert. i may be loud and talkative sis but i promise you i’m over compensating because i want you to like me lmfao. 104. Do you keep a journal/diary? i have a private twitter does that count. 105. Do you believe in second chances? depends. 106. If you found a wallet full of money on the ground, what would you do?imma keep it real with you chief i would keeps the money lmfao. in the past i would’ve tried to return it to the owner but i am big broke bois with a lot of unexpected expenses coming up so like... yeah lmfao. we keepin that coint. 107. Do you believe that people are capable of change? sometimes. 108. Are you ticklish? yes lmfao 109. Have you ever been on a plane? yeah! 110. Do you have any piercings? yah i got my lobes pierced one on each ear, my nose, and a cartilage piercing. 111. What fictional character do you wish was real? my girl nancy drew. 112. Do you have any tattoos? yeah i got 2 of em. 113. What is the best decision that you’ve made in your life so far? idk lmfao. probably when i applied for cityterm and when i appled to go back to undergrad. 114. Do you believe in karma? Yeah but not in a “oh you hurt me? you’re gonna get your come uppins” way but in a every action affects your soul and your being kinda way.  115. Do you wear glasses or contacts? im supposed to wear glasses but ask me if im wearing em right now lmfao. 116. Do you want children? presently i don’t see myself wanting or having kids but i want to foster. 117. Who is the smartest person you know? my friends lol. 118. What is your most embarrassing memory? literally every single memory has a tinge of embarassment lol. but probz when i walked into the cafeteria my first day of highschool as a smol freshman and my knees locked up and i fell forward and my giant ass backpack (because i never used my locker ever in any grade) wrapped around my neck and had me stuck in a strange position in the middle of the parting of the tables in the cafeteria.  119. Have you ever pulled an all-nighter? hell yeah lmfao. 120. What color are most of you clothes? blue or black 121. Do you like adventures? yeah! 122. Have you ever been on TV? yeah but like on the news and shit. 123. How old are you? 24 124. What is your favorite quote? i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart) 125. Do you prefer sweet or savory foods? OOF TOUGH BUT UHHH probz sweet. 

#wow i managed to answer every single one of em lmfao #delete later #ramblings #wemp womp #tagged youre it #tag games #if you read this whole thing then #you deserve a cookie #or a gold star #whatever you prefer

[despiteherself]

somewhat spoiler-y thoughts under the cut. don’t keep reading if you don’t want to see stuff about httyd3

okay. so overall i actually enjoyed httyd3 (surprising; i know). i do have lots and lots of complaints but the stuff i liked was exciting and interesting enough that i sort of just blacked out the bad stuff. and i’m going to love picking that stuff apart bc boy was there some cringy shit. especially if you don’t like hiccstrid, their scenes with actual relationship talk were awkward and wooden and god. the ending was SO :/ 

actual spoilers from here on out. you’ve been warned. 

grimmel was a lot more compelling as a villain. they sort of gave him a backstory thing and it kind of ruined it a bit for me bc it was basically “i killed a night fury as a boy and my village loved me for it so i killed all of them” but idk something about it was lacking and i was like. oh. did you guys not care enough to flesh this one out. actually, writing it down it sounds way better motivation than when he actually said it even tho it’s basically the same thing.

the deathgrippers were being controlled! grimmel was using their venom to mind control them, so any “alpha talk” didn’t get through to them and they did exactly what grimmel wanted. 

and hiccup didn’t give a shit lol. these dragons were constantly being drugged via needles in their head/neck and being forced to hunt and attack and carry grimmel around and hiccup didn’t even feel a little bit sorry for them or express any pain. the whole movie was kinda “wow ppl don’t deserve dragons we need to save them” but he didn’t express any empathy for dragons being used? not many were shown in this movie to be used, and even less that hiccup saw, but idk the whole “let the things you love go!” didn’t congeal well. 

further more, he made several terrible decisions for the entirety of berk, including running away to find the hidden world, which they had no proof even existed and absolutely kept walking exactly into everything grimmel wanted, but when ruff did it (after she was “captured” and let go she flies straight back the place they’ve settled leading grimmel back to new berk) it felt like it was being played as a WAY worse thing. like she was an idiot for doing it, and it was just! hiccup. every decision you’ve made has been panicked and blind and made your position worse and worse. 

gobber, valka and eret all get a little screen time, and they all play the naysayer stoick part? like “hiccup this is dangerous” and hiccup completely ignores them. them: hiccup we have advice hiccup: ok cool im not listening and i don’t want to hear it. they don’t even get to really explain their points of view ??????? 

valka’s other stuff is “oh we might have been followed leaving berk” and then her being all “astrid do u still love and believe in my son?????” what “he’ll listen to u” uhm ??? and no one else i get? ?/ they literally do not talk except about hiccup

gobber’s scene where he tells hiccup to marry astrid is so weird and awkward and only tuffnut yelling “oh no not the m word!” had anything that made it better. noah fence but astrid was all “that’s weird and awkward of you” and tells hiccup she thinks they’re “not ready for marriage” and the idea is silly and it 100% sounds like she’s not interested in him at all. and he’s obviously super invested and he’s all “haha maybe you can have snotlout” she makes “jokes” about snotlout being into valka. it was.... 

also. he ONLY mentioned snotlout when saying there’s other guys and idk. it ..... idk now i think about it it maybe feels the “joke” is kinda who would want snotlout which :/ but i guess means tuff and fishlegs are valid suitors? i don’t know 

hiccup in the whole was pretty weak tbh. like he didn’t stand out for me and most of his plot felt like it had a bunch of good ideas but they struggled putting it together. it’s like when u see a fic and u love the general idea but the execution is not how u would, and they go on and it’s like. i really really wouldn’t have 

they weirdly anthropomorphise toothless and then also. have him act like a dog and i found it disconcerting 

the light fury is genuinely super blobby and ugly and i cna’t believe they made me watch SO much of “uwuw sexy seductress” content and toothless being a complete airhead who licks a rock to “practice” for it. was weird and i was uncomfortable. 

also astrid is all “wow toothless has a girlfriend its so cute !!!!!!!” and they watch him watch other dragons doing mating dances and hiccup is like ‘i never pegged you for a romantic, like never” like get a fuckign hint !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! she never kisses you on the cheek. astrid expressing sentiment cause she thinks something is romantic but never for your relationship is telling you A LOT about it 

honestly. they don’t do anything to make me convinced in ANY WAY that astrid is actually into him and wants to marry him for real. at their wedding she is SO wooden and when they kiss hiccup brings his hand up but astrid is just STANDING there,,, and they look so blank. it’s so. 

also. i was right astrid was mostly just a prop for hiccup’s story and she barely interacts with anyone that isn’t hiccup or valka, and when it’s valka it’s about hiccup. 

aside from toothless, and a little bit of stormfly, the gang’s dragons are mostly just. in the background and don’t really have anything to do with anything

behind everything there were this warlords, i didn’t pick up names and apparently they were the ones who were funding drago or whatever? and they call grimmel in bc he cares about killing night furies and are hoping that it’ll mean they get all the dragons. it was kinda. i sort of liked the idea but i felt it was shoved in, and they just mentioned drago to make it seem like it was planned when they came out of nowhere. and idk not planned at all. like an idea that was good but they didn’t edit everything to make sure it fit. a lot of stuff felt kind retcon-y like apparently stoick was “obsessed with finding the hidden world” and he even mentions in a flash back that it’s not the nest they’re looking for in httyd1 so it’s so weird like. and there was this ~journals~ stoick had about it and it’s just! they never ever mentioned this before gfhsdfjhdfgjdfgfdg guys. that’s so fucking messy and kinda annoying. in the grand scheme this retconning isn’t too much, but it’s enough that it’s like. none of this was planned and i can tell and instead of making it match up you just bluster through like “actually this always happened” as if u think i’m a dumbass who will just blindly believe whatever you tell me instead of a long time fan with a personal involvement.i know some of u read my blog,,, come on   

i didn’t cry at all like lol. i had fun but i wasn’t emotional. 

no characters die don’t worry

ruff was PERFECT and everything she did was wnoderful and i LOVE her so much! she got to speak A LOT and she’s all “it’s so tough being this hot” i love you girl, and she’s over eret and is like “wow he missed out” and talks about snotlout and fishlegs which was :///// but the guys don’t do the whole fighting over her thing so that’s! and she’s like “i guess fishlegs but he’s a nerd” and at the end he cries at the wedding and she’s like “wow i guess the sensitive guy wins” so a lot of her stuff was kinda about men ://// but herself was PERFECT and she boops grimmel’s face with the bobble ends of her hair pretending they’re a zippleback. she makes jokes about why is grimmel’s face so long, and her’s is long but WOW does that take the cake. and she says “astrid round face” it was so !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! she’s so good i love her 

rupple does a good job with tuff. the voice difference was noticeable and i kept thinking about it but i think he did well. tuff gets a bunch of speaking parts and he’s super involved with the whole wedding concept and he’s like “haha wow hiccy, a DOES NOT WANT to get married 2 u LOL. which is #tru cause like. she’s a viking warrior queen and you’re well you. you need to shape up. also. be more like me” which i will TAKE i cannot believe tuffstrid is REAL. also now im about 80% convinced hiccup and astrid took a break to see other ppl and tuffstrid fucked. tuff and astrid don’t really interact except for when they leave ruff behind but they KEEP on doing this whole, vibe thing that makes them seem like they’re good friends. like. tuff thinking he knows what astrids want or admires and he actually goes and all his advice/pep talk is like half leg jokes but it’s all good????? tuff has ear piercings, they’re SO on point they look so good, and he’s got rings all over his fingers i love this kid so much he’s so great. he calls his braid his beard and whenever anyone looks a little sad he like, shoves their face into his braid to comfort them.

also tuff says there’s no edge of the world cause actually it’s round like the sun and the moon and stars, even tho stars are dumb. 

i was right fishlegs’ first sentence is basically them all going “wow a nerd” akdshgfkdjghfg. he doesn’t get as much screen time as the others, and most of it is focused on fishmeat, who is ADORABLE and PERFECT. that big moose dragon meets fishmeat at the start and they become bffs and he defends his lil buddy

snotlout’s also not as much screen time, and most of it is him following valka around and being impressed with her and wanting her to say nice things about him. the rest is him getting caught on his cape. valka says nice stuff about eret cause he’s actually good at this planning stuff (except one bit thats played for jokes where snotlout is like “we should spilt up cause *good reasons*” and then eret is like “we should spilt up cause i feel like it” and valka’s all “i trust your instincts!!!!”. it was weird bc it was the only really good tactical decision snotlout made and it gets ignored) and he keeps getting his ego pumped up when he takes what valka says wrong - like she’s being polite, or there’s double meanings and he takes it like he’s good but all he did was get caught on a cage and hung there until hookfang picked him up - and at the end she says “eret maybe brawn, but you’re the brains” and snotlout feels validated again but he doesn’t really deserve it? like idk i wish she said something meaningful. it’s not kind to make someone feel like they’re good at something they’re not. you should encourage him when he’s doing well. 

eret is just kinda. around. doing things. and being like, snotlout’s “rival” for valka’s attention and eret is like. what are you on about lmao

also. i’ve seen some out of context spoilers and they mentioned something being gay but i don’t know where that’s from? snotlout kinda says some great things about eret but it’s a real squint and gobber says eret has the body of a norse god but then he says he does as well and then puts a crick in back when he’s stretching so it’s very clearly a joke and it’s definitely like ‘he’s fat and old and dirty its funny cause he thinks he’s attractive” rather than anything else

hmmMMmmMMMMM god ive forgotten what i’ve talked about and what i haven’t im sure i have more to say but this is already super long os. you can ask me questions if u like. send me an im or something 

#httyd3 spoilers #httyd 3 spoilers #hidden world spoilers #spoilers #httyd3 #dot post

[valentinesparda]

rdr2insert infodump post because im in cowboy hell:

born and raised somewhere in new austin because it’s a reference to texas yeehaw 

but if you try to ask me WHERE i don’t know

the oldest sibling so learned to do all the things like hunt, sew, read, draw, ride into town, etc

probably from a line of showmen but i know for a fact that them, their dad, and one of their brothers were all a part of an act and mainly performed for a quick buck wherever they could so they can play the guitar and they can sing

they read but it’s mostly storybooks and they can, have, and will read until they pass out with the book on their face

carry around their grandfather’s pocket watch and collect....so many more along with just....shiny things in general.... they wear so many rings that it’s actually annoying tbh

they only recently decided to leave their home to travel just because they got so bored staying in one place for so long

i mean like....very recently. within the previous few months before the events of rdr2

taught themselves archery but their technique is a little lacking. someone charles help them please

taught how to properly shoot guns and hunt mainly from their mom. again theyre....a decent shot to start out

taught to throw axes and knives by dad and kinda has a collection from him tbh

carries one of their moms hunting rifles, grandfathers revolver, and an axe and a knife from their dads collection

really prefers not to use guns if they have to but will not hesitate to pull out a knife on anyone for any reason

their horse is a big-ass fresian and they got it from their grandfather. i havent named it yet but hi.

they have a weird way with animals which can be a blessing or a curse because sometimes the dogs or cats in town will file after them and they worry about the animals getting hurt

really good at playing poker and will do to the whole “aw i dont know how to play can you guys teach me :)” thing before they drain all the pockets at the table

has so many little cuts and scars on their hands from playing five finger fillet which is an actual thing i also used to do in high school

meets arthur by pretending to be coughs actually is stranded on the side of the road, proceeds to try and rob him

arthur is like “kid what the fuck” and knocks them on their ass and when he has them basically at gunpoint on the ground they really just do the “*crying* please mr cowboy im alone, starving, and nowhere near home im just tryin to survive” which is mostly an act and mostly real reaction

to which arthur is like “ah shit. i cant just let you die huh” and now my insert gets to follow him back to main camp to have some stew

NO ONE IS HAPPY ABOUT HIM BRINGIN HOME A STRAY

“sure i guess you can stay here but only for a bit and only if you pull your weight” and theyre like “oh my god are you kidding yes i would love to be a cowboy” 

but everyone else is like “you can’t be a cowboy we’re literally on the run from the law and theyre like “THIS IS WHAT I WANTED”

surprisingly works really hard to keep their word

works as a distraction most of the time because of how good an actor they are like how do you do that how do you cry on cue how do you switch personas on a dime--

is also good for sneaky things if they need someone light on their feet to steal mostly small things you just gotta empty their pockets for real or else they keep things for themselves and dont put it in the community box

is mostly close to arthur to the point where they basically consider him their dad 

which means they seem to only open up when he is around and they are often found at camp drawing together

most people feel threatened by my insert because of how abrasive and snappy they are in the beginning but once they bond with everyone over time they realize just how alone they are and cant bring themselves to leave

maybe one day i’ll write a giant thing about their relationships with everyone in the gang but im still gettin a feel for everyone

anyways peace

#self: rdr #we did it fam. rdr2 insert is a go #si: elliot rhodes #el.txt #long post