#okay depression update guys I’m cured????
Text
The racism, sexism, homophobia, ableism and cruel tropes in Voltron
So, it’s the anniversary of the ending of Voltron. And I’m getting really, really tired of people saying that only shippers hated the ending. There were many issues with Voltron, and they were neither limited to shipping nor to S8.
So, I’ve decided to compile a list.
It gets LONG. Turns out there was a hell of a lot of racist, sexist, ableist and cruel tropes in VLD.
In fact, I had originally planned on writing a list of both the terrible tropes and the plot holes. But there just wasn’t enough room for both. The post is huge as it is, and with the plot holes, it would have been twice as long, so I had to focus on only one thing.
Salt, obviously. So, so, so much salt. I could turn a lake into a sea here. You’ve been warned.
RACISM:
1) The Alteans are genocide survivors. Out of all the Alteans, only the black Altean was used for a Reverse Racism story where she resents a teammate for belonging to the race that exterminated hers. The white Alteans are totally cool with him, and with his race in general, and only hate the bad people. But the black one had to be taught that hating people because of their race is wrong.
2) VLD Allura is also the only version of Allura who is black. In every other Voltron media (several different cartoons and comics), Allura is blond with blue eyes. All the white versions of the character get a happy ending, while only the black version ends up dying to save the world.
While "hero sacrifices their life to save the world" is not a bad trope in and of itself, it becomes bad when it kills off one of the extremely few black female characters in leading roles. You kill off a white male hero, there are 463278462387 more. You kill off the black female hero, you are kinda screwed. Making it worse, Allura had been portrayed as suffering from depression throughout the latest seasons, so that her death comes across less as heroic sacrifice and more as suicide.
3) The brown Cuban kid who dreamed of being a pilot, and never once in 78 episodes ever expressed anything but sheer love for an exciting life, in the final two minutes of the final episode ends up realizing that the place for him is a farm.
4) As told in interviews, Lotor was meant to be a bad example of mixed-race person, to contrast him with Keith as good example of mixed race person. Do I even have to point out how messed up this is?
5) Even before they became Space Nazis, back when they were still on the side of the angels, the Galra invaded and conquered planets. This is portrayed as totally cool when they happily name the prince after a "hero" who invaded and conquered a lot of worlds, and the peaceful Alteans think the guy is just as heroic as one of their greatest scientists. Apparently there is such a thing as ethically killing people to steal their land.
6) They whitewashed Keith, a character who is poc in every other iteration of Voltron.
I’m sure a lot of people are going to get angry here, claiming that I hate Keith. Let me assure you, I don’t. I love Keith, and I hate what was done to him. I hate that they took a traditionally poc character and went to frankly ridiculous lengths to erase that part of his character. Keith should be Asian, and it would be incredibly easy to make him so in VLD (seriously, all they’d have to do is update the freaking bios, an intern could do it right now in 5 minutes). But they refuse to do it.
A lot of people don’t realise that the surname “Kogane” in VLD is fanon.
I’m serious. Check his official bios page. Keith is not actually called Keith Kogane in VLD. Fans started calling him that in fanfiction, and it stuck, but it’s not canon.
In every other Voltron media, Keith is an Asian guy. But in VLD, they:
- went out of their way to always avoid giving him an Asian surname
- gave him a Texan father
- refused to confirm his race, even when every other character had a specific race. Again, check his official bios. All the other characters got a race, Keith gets “human.” It got so ridiculous it would be funny if it weren’t sad. It pretty much went like this:
Fans: Keith is half alien, but about his human half, what is his ethnicity?
EPs: oh, we couldn't possibly say, because the story takes place in the future, and in the future, everybody is mixed up! So, Keith is HUMAN, we can't give him a specific race because there are no specific races in the future!
Fans: ok. And what are the races of the other characters?
EPs: Pidge is Italian, Lance is Cuban, Hunk is half-black half- Samoan, Shiro is Japanese.
Fans: but Keith...?
EPs: HUMAN! There is no such thing as race in the future!
Some people at least hoped that Keith's Texan father had Asian ancestry because he kinda looked like Shiro, who is Japanese. But the EPs confirmed that the resemblance was just a coincidence, they never meant for the dad to look Japanese.
At this point pretty much the only evidence that Keith is Asian is that he is voiced by an Asian person. But then, Josh Keaton is not Japanese, is he?
7) After whitewashing Keith, they claimed he is the best leader of Voltron, better than his poc predecessor, because he has Galra blood.
So, instead of bringing up any sort of legit reason to justify why Keith should be in charge (like his empathy or pilot skills), they go with "the half-white guy is also half space-nazi and that's why he should give the orders instead of the poc guy."
If you think I’m bashing Keith here, please ask yourself why you are getting angry at the person pointing out the whitewashing instead of getting angry at the whitewashing. Especially when, again, making VLD Keith canonically poc could be done anytime with zero cost and zero effort, and DW just doesn’t want to.
- Hunk, the half-black half-Samoan guy, was going to be killed and replaced as Paladin by a blue alien. The EPs were pissed when DW forbade them to, and complained in the interview about it.
SEXISM:
Every single woman who is ever put in charge ends up going insane, making terrible decisions that endanger her planet, or losing all of her authority.
Allura starts out as co-leader of Voltron and leader of the Coalition. Ends up as a foot soldier who takes orders from the new leader and his right-hand man, and is treated as a cadet by the Earth military.
HOMOPHOBIA:
1) Dreamworks, Netflix and the EPs very, very, very heavily promoted S7 as GLBT-friendly. The EPs gave whole interviews about the past relationship between Shiro and new character Adam, retweeted a ton of posts celebrating Shiro’s homosexuality, and enthusiastically sent tweets like "you are going to see more of Adam in S7! :D" from their personal accounts after they showed the episode that introduced him.
In S7:
- Shiro's homosexuality is so ambiguous that even the Brazilian voice actor didn't realize that he was supposed to be gay. Just by watching the show, without knowing the World Of God, you can’t tell he and the other guy were engaged.
- Adam gets about 30 seconds of screentime after that one episode they had already shown. Then he dies screaming in pain and terror in a fire.
A lot of people claimed that it was okay to kill Adam because Shiro was supposed to be our rep, not Adam, who was a brand new character we knew little about. And, out of context, that would be true. Adam was pretty much a NPC, why would his death matter?
But the problem here is the context:
- Shiro is closeted in S7, you need to read interviews to know he is gay. So, if only Shiro is meant to be the rep, they couldn’t even do that right.
- They very heavily marketed both Shiro and Adam as gay rep, and specifically talked at length about Adam in several interviews.
In THAT context, REGARDLESS of what you ship, killing off Adam revealed a complete willingness to manipulate the audience to the point of outright lying. Even if you hated Adam, even if Adashi is your NOTP, the clear evidence that the creators had absolutely no problem making empty promises was NOT a good sign.
2) The moment Shiro is revealed to be gay in interviews, he is practically quarantined from the Team.
3) Shiro is also given a Totally Not AIDS deadly disease.
Making it even worse, Shiro never actually gets cured in canon. We are told he is cured in interviews, but the show itself drops the topic entirely. Depending on where you lean in the Word Of God VS Death Of The Author debate, Shiro may be doomed to die.
4) A female villain is revealed to be a lesbian. 30 seconds later she gleefully tortures a little girl. Then she, too, dies in a fire.
(Fan outrage about pulling two Bury Your Gays in the Season that had been very heavily promoted as GLBT-friendly caused DW to retcon her death and bring her back in S8, but she was originally meant to die in the explosion)
5) Shiro ends up marrying a random character who doesn’t even get a name in the show.
ABLEISM:
1) Shiro's PTSD magically disappears offscreen. In interviews, the EPs claimed that he "got over it" between S6 and S7 because "he is a professional." Wow! Who knew being a professional magically cures mental illnesses!
2) Shiro is an amputee. The EPs admitted that they never put any thought into his status as disabled rep, they just wanted a character with a cool-looking arm. It literally didn't occur to them that making him lose his arm (TWICE! First up to the biceps, then up to the shoulder) meant anything. Also worth noting that Shiro’s new arm makes him look like the guy who tormented him.
3) Shiro is systematically robbed of his agency.
- He is the only Paladin who never gets to use his bayard.
- He loses his bond with Black for no given canon reason (and the reason they give in interviews makes no sense, they basically say that transferring his soul out of the Black Lion makes her stop loving him. But she still lets Zarkon fly her!).
I know that Keith is traditionally Black’s pilot in Voltron media (although that shouldn’t matter, because VLD made a lot of huge changes to the traditional status quo). But if they wanted Black Paladin Keith that badly, they could have given some non-insulting reason for it. For example, say “because Shiro has spent so much time within Black, their bond is now so strong that he will get absorbed again if he flies her again.” Or co-pilots in Black (if Pidge can co-pilot with Matt, why can’t Shiro co-pilot with Keith?).
- He is defeated not only by Sendak, but also by a bunch of random Alteans. He basically can’t win a fight anymore unless it’s played for laughs.
- His new robot Atlas is bigger than Voltron, but also much weaker, and can only buy a few minutes for Voltron to come save the day.
- Every single enemy he ever defeated comes back to be finished off by somebody else (even the friggin' Gladiator from S1 comes back in S8). In the epilogue, he retires in his twenties.
4) Narti, the disabled General, is fridged shortly after her introduction. For a while at least it seemed like her death had affected the remaining three Generals, but then it turns out that the "For Narti" line was a trick and they never actually planned on avenging her.
CRUEL TROPES:
1) They intentionally baited the fans by pushing the plot thread that Lotor would be redeemed. They named the episode where he defects "A New Defender," they kept saying in interviews that they come from Avatar and they are very familiar with Zuko *hint hint*, they showed his family as incredibly abusive and Lotor himself as desperate, they showed that Lotor was a victim of severe racism (he is mixed race, and as stated above, the Galra are Space Nazis and are pretty obsessed with blood purity).
Then, after revealing him to be a villain, they gave an interview where they practically dislocated their shoulders by patting themselves on the back as they gleefully bragged that "we made them think we would give them a Zuko, but we gave them an Azula!"
(Nevermind the fact that Azula herself was a 14-year-old child, not a monster, and that Aaron Ehasz himself confirmed that he always wanted her to be redeemed).
When fans who are survivors of child abuse told them that the bait-and-switch was really hurtful, they laughed it off, and claimed that Lotor was just beyond redemption. Then they proceeded to redeem Lotor's abusive parents, who were objectively much worse.
2) Shiro’s clone, who sincerely believed he was Shiro and always meant well, was dehumanised, demonised and discarded like his life meant nothing. His short existence was full of pain from literally the moment he first opened his eyes, as Haggar kept torturing him with migraines to manipulate him. In the end, she brutally violates him body and mind, and brainwashes him to force him to turn on the family he was so desperate to find in The Journey. He dies in incredibly questionable circumstances, without ever getting to learn that his family survived Haggar’s plans. He is victim-blamed for the things she forced him to do against his will with mind-control, and is never mourned because the only family he ever had writes him off as a “thing” and “evil.”
In fact, the horrific treatment of Kuron foreshadowed S8. The Medium article “It never stops at one - Why Voltron: Legendary Defender's tragic ending wasn't a surprise and why more DreamWorks' series will follow suit” explains how.
The tl;dr version is that, when a story posits that the circumstances of your birth determine the value of your life, so that good intentions and hard work mean nothing, and long-established bonds can be discarded with zero thought and care, and your very humanity can be revoked over something you have absolutely no control over, and the whole sociopathic disaster is celebrated as a happy ending... it really, really can’t end well. Not just for you, but for the entire cast.
#voltron critical#vld shiro#vld keith#vld lance#vld allura#vld lotor#voltron#voltron salt#takashi shirogane
315 notes
·
View notes
Text
Spoilers for Black Powder War Chapters 11-END
Hello Everyone,
Long time no post. But I finally finished the book!! It has been an exhilarating, rage inducing, hilarious, and historically frustrating few chapters. As such, there were quite a few times, I had to put the book down because I couldn’t bare what was about to happen or what I thought was about to happen. And it either turned out as I expected or completely surprise me. As such, my slow progress is finished and I’m ready to share my thoughts, predictions, and results of previous predictions!
SPOILERS:
I would summarize this portion of the book to the previous section as “Out of the Frying Pan and Into the Fire” situation and that summarizes a good portion of what goes from one chapter to the next in this section as well. I think that would be the best way I could summarize it without spoilers. But Spoilers:
And so, my prediction in my previous post came to pass regarding them getting waylaid on the way back to England and forced into the war between France and Prussia. They were told they couldn’t leave until the promised dragons showed up. And newsflash they never did. Also, when an opportunity arises for Laurence to take his Temeraire and Crew and leave, he doesn’t take it and sticks it out only to suffer under the terrible decisions of the Prussians and them losing the war.
Also, the Prussians’ in ability to listen when they were told what was wrong with their battle strategies because it came from dragons. This along with the inability to listen to advice and their exuberance lost them their land. They try after their first loss and the fact that they are disorganized and under committed leading to such tragedies as seen in history books regarding this campaign. This sadly while tried to remedied later has no effect as they are too little to late.
The ineffectiveness of the leaders is obvious as it was throughout history and the fact that they are so disorganized and giving themselves false advice loosing thousands of men because they can’t make their minds up makes me want to scream and swear and tell them how stupid they are in very colorful words. But I’m not going to do so here as I do plenty of swearing at their incompetency as I’m reading the book. And while I knew this was coming to some degree as I know this history, it is still frustrating as these are our precious crew that are left to suffer for it!
Though, I’m amazed by how it feels like I’m facing down the battlefield against the French and losing at every turn. The brilliant aerial battles and strategies that Lien brought to the war. The way they effectively distract and take down our allies is terrifying in how well it works. And the ways that they utilize things seen in China for everyday uses to battlefield advantages just are amazing and well thought out and utilized. It is even more terrifying because I can see how it could potentially go even worse as they implement more of these strategies to war.
ALSO, WE FINALLY MET BONAPARTE!!!!!!!!!! He is interesting based on what little we have seen of him. He is definitely ahead of his time on things and they skills he used to plan out what happens is enormous. I doubt that this series will get any less heart pounding when we are in battle especially if he is there. Though I’m wrong and it is the second battle and not the first one where they fight Bonaparte.
WHAT IS WITH CHARACTERS FALLING PROBABLY TO THEIR DEATHS!!!! When Granby fell and was rescued by Temeraire I had a heart pounding, anxious minute where I thought he was going to die and I just stopped. I couldn’t face another death and be okay with it. So it was a great relief, when he didn’t. Though I don’t think I’ll ever recover from the deaths.
So earlier, Tharkey said he was leaving and told Laurence he was leaving. I didn’t expect it but he did fill his contract. But what he did was even more surprising. I was prepared to not see him again and be very depressed about it only for him to come back with the aid for Laurence and Temeraire. He brought the Ferals and I was completely surprised! Tharkey has cemented himself in how much I love the guy!!!!
ISKIERKA IS A RIOT!!! I love that my prediction came true but she is better than I ever expected. From her hatching, Iskierka is a battle hungry little thing and Granby is just like all my plans for if I ever got a dragon are dashed and she is a riot terror but I’m completely in love with the little devil. Granby has his work cut out for him with keeping Iskierka from causing trouble. And she is going to be hilarious and won’t take no nonsense and will probably be just as head strong as the series continues. But it does make me sad to know he will not be part of Temeraire’s crew anymore and we will see less of him then prior and that makes me sad.
The grand escape at the very end of the book using the Ferals and Temeraire as transportation saving most of the garrison was ingenious and I sped through it on baited breath to see how many they would save and if they would make it out. Tharkey dressing up and drugging the Fleur-de-Nuit was worrying as I didn’t know if he would make it but I was so happy that they did and that they succeeded and are now heading back to England.
I’m sad to say my prediction involving the Ferals was wrong and that our trusted crew doesn’t have a Feral egg to go along with their other egg. It would have been interesting but I wasn’t expecting them to return with all the Ferals.
I’M ENRAGED BY THE IDIOT’S LETTER AT THE END OF THE BOOK! D. Salcombe’s letter just enraged me. I’m sitting here going no you moron who knows nothing of dragons and not interested in actually meeting one you shouldn’t put your two cents in. The fact you are uneducated idiot and a religious fanatic does not mean you have the right to say anything. I’m just so mad at it. Especially after, Laurence realization that the French and to some degree the Prussians getting used to dragons the way the Chinese are with their dragons was amazing. Watching this growth and him admitting that Temeraire’s opinion about Dragon Rights and that they need these changes. And here is a man that thinks that it shouldn’t happen.
PREDICTIONS:
I’m updating my earlier prediction: I predict that the plague/illness/sickness seen in Throne of Jade, is going to be the cause of why the promised British Dragons didn’t show up and that it will be a very bad situation back in England.
With this prediction, I add another prediction where Temeraire and his crew go on an adventure to find a cure, which means Africa.
I also predict that Temeraire is going to try to introduce his ideas and the stupid people in power are going to ignore him and treat him like an animal.
My last prediction at this time is that the Ferals aren’t going to like the state of Britain and are going to want to leave or go fight elsewhere.
14 notes
·
View notes
Text
(banner not mine, simply copied from @ao3commentoftheday)
so i have a lot of bookmarks saved on google chrome (hmu if you want me to do a writing resources list or a second fic rec), and i thought might as well do a fic rec! i seperated them by fandom’s and i did my very best to tell you why i love the fic, but i think i just rambled lmao
tagging my friends who i think might b interested: @ocfairygodmother @phoenixwench @leftzonkpsychicland @artish-calamity
minor warning, this is a long list~
Vampire Diaries:
Bits of Sunshine is my favorite Vampire Diaries fic, it has a really funny and charming OC and gives you a different perspective of the main characters and it really inspired me with my own TVD fanfic, it’s still on hiatus but it’s nearly 500k makes up for it
The Bystander offers a unique view to OCs, where the OC is separated from the main plot for the most part but interacts with main characters that eventually pull her in
Crimson Peak is really good if you love a powerful Bonnie Bennett, it explores the magic of Expression more and her family background and OC Bennetts and it offers a interesting plot and a rare pairing of Klaus/Bonnie
The Next Chapter is a Buffy crossover fanfic, it puts Buffy in the Vampire Diaries, and though I still haven’t finished it was pretty good at meshing the two shows and exploring more of an older Buffy ~
My Paper Heart is really good if you’ve been trying to look for f/f in this fandom and haven’t found it, it not only explores the oc’s sexuality but also their supernatural identity
beneath the steady waves of fearless hope and grace is also a really good queer bennett witch oc, the oc wakes up in TVD in the body of her parallel fictional universe self I guess you could say, and it has a lot of angst like whoo boi, prepare yourself, it’s so good!
Human is pretty good, love their oc, it hasn’t been updates in a very long while but it has 100k+ and it’s 100% worth it if you’re looking for something different
Harry Potter:
Changes Everything is really good at addressing the potential problems in the Wizarding World through the lenses of an OC, and it has Harry getting the family he fucking deserves sooner rather than later, and it goes into amazing detail and depth over the magics of the universe. also, lots of lgbt+ characters~
@nonchalantxfish ‘s Rose Petal Red is so good, like, you want Slytherins being amazing and devious, this is the fic for you! you want ocs galore?? this is for you! you want changes to the plot but with serious consequences?? this one is for YOU! Although it’s on haitus rn, it has a shit ton of words, like 500k+ and it’s 100% worth it~
The Clockwork Locket is so good guys, it’s an Marauder era fic, and it has an amazing mix of humor and mystery and romance and friendship and by the end you’ll be shipping the oc with literally everyone lmao, but overall it’s just really good if you’re looking for a Sirius/OC but still want to read about the mysteries in Hogwarts and the OC has her own plot and storyline. The second installment is still in progress but the first installment is like 270k words
Daphne Greengrass, Side Character is what it says on the tin, it’s about daphne and takes a different approach to the character with humor and wit, it’s very enjoyable, still not finished but it’s at 100k+ words
To Be a Slytherin, pretty sure everyone’s seen this one at one point, it’s a really good oc potter twin fanfic, goes into detail with magic and it’s just really good and has one of the longest word count i’ve ever seen at 1,166,349
The Observer Effect is a MCU crossover with adult fem!Harry, it hasn’t been updating in a while, but from what I remember it’s super good and funny!
Naruto:
A Holmes in Konoha is super good, an Holmes OC is reincarnated as a orphan in Konoha, it explores the Nara’s more and it’s just so good at meshing investigation, friendship and relationships, action and drama~
Deja vu no Justu is a time travel fic, it’s really good, have not caught up to it since it first started but it has 500k+ words written and from what I remember it was very well written, like holy shit that was good writing ~
How to Obtain a Reverse Harem in Naruto by @burntpetal16 is pretty freakin good at making me laugh, it’s a remake of their finished fanfic, Sakura, which is equally as good, it’s about an self-insert OC suddenly waking up as Sakura, and Sakura def does what it says on the tin but also there’s an air of mystery surrounding the OC and how they got in the universe who she was before
The Yondaime’s Assistant is finished at 165k+ words and it’s good, like so good, it’s an OC reincarnated into Naruto fanfic, and it’s different from a lot of other OCs in the fandom because the OC goes into the Genin Corps instead of going out into the field, the writer manages to enthrall you with paperwork basically as the OC saves people from the background, it’s also endgame poly relationship between her, Genma and Kakashi!
After the Rain is a fem!Naruto time-travel fanfic, another fic which i haven’t finished, but from what I remember it was it’s done really well and has a lot of angst and drama and action and it’s just, prepare YOSELF for HEART wrenching ANGST!! also it’s 500k+ words!
The Witcher:
The Sorceress, The Witcher, The Bard and a Girl is what it says on the tin, it’s AU and an established ot3 situation w Yen/Geralt/Jaskier and it’s just,,, family fluff, disgusting domestic with all the drama that comes with three emotionally... complicated people trying to raise a young girl who has powers, starts off in a small town
Lullaby of the Isles is more so the game/book fandom, but it’s so good that I just didn’t care about that small fact, it’s still only four chapters but all together those four chapters have 17k+, and it’s about an OC suddenly waking up as a siren, a boss monster siren to exact, right after the siren had killed someone, and it’s just really good and different
And Yet Here We Are is a collection of more ot3 fanfic of Yen/Geralt/Jaskier, it’s basically a lot of sexy times, but also some funny situations
to grow in adversity is the only fanfic that on this list i haven’t actually read, but the premise seems interesting enough, it’s about Renfri surviving and it has Jaskier as her baby bro
Better Love is surprise! another ot3 fanfic, only this time, you get to feel the pain of an unestablished relationship, it’s basically just Yen & Jaskier bickering while Yen tries to get Jaskier to fuck Geralt. It’s v horny, with a big hunking side of angst and some fluff. Completed and waiting for me to finish the last two chapter!
Teen Wolf:
Sonder is @musiciatee ‘s OC fanfic, and it’s so good??? like every update I get to read blesses my imaginary crops, cures my depression and makes my skin glow like an goddess. If you’re looking for a good POC OC in this fandom, this is it okay.
Kerosene Hearts and Matchbox Bodies is an OC fanfic, by @thegalanerd, it’s being reworked right now, but 100% worth the read, but like, I would recommend any of their fanfics, it’s all very good like HOLY SHET it’s good.
Red Rover, Red Rover is a pretty damn good OC fic, it’s on hiatus but it has 73 chapters and like nearly 500k words, it’s very dramatic, angsty, slow burn, mysterious, and the OC has their own little drama to deal with outside of the main plot
The Unconventional Life of Abigail McCall is probably one everyone has read by now, but if you haven’t, give it a shot, it made me smile a lot
Doctor Who:
Three of a Kind, The Stuff of Legends is an male OC Tyler fanfic, and by god it is so good, very angsty, lots of drama, very AU, lowkey domestic, this drama gay OC must be protecccted at all costs
London Born is another Tyler OC, but Rose and her have different dad’s and she’s a character of color and bisexual, it’s just such a good fucking story and a favorite of mine, it’s also very AU and has a lot of original stories that the OC goes on, sometimes by themselves. It’s the first in a series, but this first installment is finished so I’d suggest subscribing to the collection for the second installment~
The Blonde Girl is the first installment of an AU of Rose’s start in the Doctor’s life, starting with them meeting randomly during different parts of their life and it basically slowly weaves Rose into the Doctor’s life/past. It’s really good, haven’t finished it yet, but I liked how they changed/expanded Rose’s character. Once you finish that you’ll want to start Defender of the Earth and The Companion Connection, the other’s I haven’t read yet so I don’t know the order they go in, but they’re all like 100k+ words and the author is still regularly updating their newest installment so enjoy~
Alexander-The Seer and Changer of Time is probably the longest DW OC fic out here, and was only last updated early last, but at a word count of 1477k+, I’m sure we’ll survive. This is another fic I haven’t finished reading, but one I’d high recommend either way. If I’m remembering correctly, don’t like quote me on this, but I believe their OC was non gender conforming.
The Dread of Tomorrow and Yesterday was sadly cut short before the author finished, but the OC is so amazing and just my hero, and a character of color, will fight everyone and probably win, and just I love this OC so much and even though it probably won’t ever be finished it’s worth the read and it’s at nearly 800k so, enjoy each word~
Sailor Moon:
Rabbit of the Moon, is literally the ONLY fic I’m rec in this fandom, mainly because it’s the only fanfic I’ve ever read in this fandom, but it’s so good, like I was just feeling nolgastic over what was my first anime, but the OC is so...scary and smart and cunning and intense af
Twilight:
Twilight'd is a really good OC, it made me laugh a lot, and it makes you love the characters more than the actual writer made you like them
A Hundred Winks of Sunshine by @tsume-yuki is so good, like, I don’t know how to articulate how much I love their SI!Bella, like, I don’t read these types of stories a lot, but, tbh any story made them is just worth taking the risk to read because you won’t be let down. It’s very funny and charming and so good!
GOT/ASOIAF:
How To Lose Your Dragon is not really what it says on the tin, trust me I would never read a fic that would have anyone steal Dany’s dragons, it’s just the dragons like Jon, hmm I wonder why?? kind of fic, and I really love the way the writer writes Dany
Can beauty come out of ashes is another Dany-centric fanfic, and it’s really good so far, but I’m only on the second chapter so I can’t say much but I like the idea of the Starks and Dany becoming pack. It ignores s7-8, so we already love~
MCU:
The Scientist is a good Loki/OC fanfic, like it’s so good because the OC doesn’t put up with any shit, and is very smart and it’s just so freakin good and cute and such a fucking slow burn, like get ready for some slow burn
Just An Old Fashioned Love Song by @izhunny is such a good Frostiron fic, like, so fucking good, just THE FLUFF~ THE DOMESTICS??? SO GOOD!! ALSO!! ALMOST ALWAYS MAKES ME FREAKING HUNGRY!!! haven’t finished this, but I’d highly recommend it
Code Blue by @jarvis-is-my-copilot likeee, I haven’t finished reading this either, haha sorry, but I really like the OCs and it’s just.....SO....GOOD!!!
The Wooden Puppet is a really good OC fanfic, very different from ur usual OC, love the way the OC interacts with the characters and I love the way it started, it’s hilarious
Archaic Kinds Of Fun is like, all of my dreams and hopes for the Avengers put into one fic with an amazing OC, like did you want the team as a family, or hell even friends??? do you want them to get fuckin therapy??? HERE YOU GO! It hasn’t been updated in a while because the author has been through a tough time, but it’s at 370k+ and it’s just really good. an inspiration to me. Bruce/OC too, which is rare, but like, it’s just so fuckin cute and the OC is super fucking close w Tony too and Loki joins in later in the fic and it adds some comic book characters but, WOO, it’s just...SO GOOD!
Lilies Say Sorry is another Loki/OC fanfic that I liked that didn’t make me concerned over the power dynamics of Loki being a, well god. It’s the first in it’s installment, still haven’t finished the second installment, shocking, I know, it’s almost like I have a habit of doing that. But I’d highly suggest reading this, it’s just so good and the DRAMA!
I Need You is a Tony/Reader, and like, I usually don’t read Reader fics, but holy shit this is so good and the Author doesn’t do Y/N to address the character, but like, it’s just really good at drawing you in and it’s good at putting the character into the movies in a fresh way. It cured my acne. Very regular updates. almost at 400k.
Caught Hot-Rod Red Handed is a Stony fic, it’s really fucking good at making me laugh so I’d highly suggest reading this if you’re feeling low, but also don’t read this late at night, you’ll wake up ur family and make them think ur laughing in ur sleep
Life In The Fast Lane is a Fast and Furious crossover fanfic, it’s the first installment, but you don’t need to know anything about the movies to be able to read it, it’s Tony/OC, (hahha you can literally see who I favor from my recs), and it’s so good, and the OC is bisexual and I love her and more people need to read because the author writes romance and action so freaking good
ps: please leave a nice review on their fanfics if you do read and enjoy some of these, because just one nice comment can make a fanfic writers day if not week, it lets them know that real people really are reading their stuff, even if it’s just a ‘good chapter’
#lol what is life??#i've been doing this for days/hours#ocappreciation#like holy shit a lot of ocs#fanfiction recommendation#fanfic rec list#fanfiction rec#i'm a fuckin zombie rn guys#and this barely fuckin scratches the surface of my bookmarks#if i made a mistake pls forgive me#might reblog this early tomorrow so this won't flop#long post
32 notes
·
View notes
Text
Life Updates
Hi y’all. I know a lot of you haven’t heard from me personally in awhile, and so I wanted to give some updates and explain some things.
So, life summary of the past year. I’m 20 years old, a junior at a prestigious university. Two years ago I began to be treated for hypothyroidism in addition to my treatments for clinical depression and anxiety disorder. My medications created a thyroid storm last September, putting me in the hospital for a week and setting back my recovery. Last November, my dad lost his job, and although he found a new job by January, we’re still suffering the effects of the income loss for those three months. This September, I caught a cold which fucked with my thyroid meds, leading me to become increasingly lethargic and lack focus. This drop in my adrenal function due to the thyroid misfunction led to me having to medically withdraw from this semester of school. I have two guinea pigs. I used to have one, Toby, and over the summer I wanted to get him a friend, so I got Trajan. Trajan had a genetic disease which I didn’t have the money to test and cure, so I decided to keep him on painkillers until I could hopefully get the money to run the testing. He died only a month after I got him. Then I got Tacitus, because Toby had gotten used to having Tray around. Tacitus was healthy, but in August Toby got a bad cold over the weekend, and I had to take him to the emergency vet. He’s okay now though.
Why does this all matter? It explains some of my medical and financial situation, and why I haven’t been online or writing as much. Part of it is I’ve pretty much moved on from Marvel. It doesn’t really motivate me anymore. But I’ve also been having a lot of health struggles that have made simply getting out of bed and being awake for more than an hour very difficult. And I was working two jobs trying to pay off the vet bills from Trajan and from Toby’s cold. I had to quit those jobs along with school when I got sicker, meaning I still have a huge amount on my credit card and owe my mom some money for covering vet things while I’ve been short on cash. I’m working on getting another job now, as you guys have helped me with (thank you!) but I’m waiting on responses.
Continuing. Yesterday, I had an appointment with a cardiac neurologist, and he told me he was almost positive I have a condition called neuropathic POTS. Neuropathic POTS is a condition where the small neurons in my limbs, the ones that directly connect all the muscles and veins and tissues to the main autonomic nervous system, have broken down in their saline barriers. This is small fiber neuropathy. The small fiber neuropathy means that when I stand from sitting or lying down, unlike in a healthy human my nerves don’t send signals well enough to make the veins in my legs respond to the pressure change as they should -- when you stand, your veins in your legs contract to create more blood volume in your chest and head instead of having it pool in your lower extremities. Without the proper nerve signaling, my veins don’t contract well enough. This is the POTS part -- it leads to dizziness, fainting, migraines, and a whole plethora of other health issues. It is an autoimmune disease, and it’s suspected to be linked to my hypothyroidism, as a certain type of hypothyroidism that my mother has called Hashimodo’s Disease is also caused by autoimmune problems, and I have eczema, another autoimmune problem. Neuropathic POTS cannot be confirmed without testing, but the tests are being done over the next six months, as my doctor is booked very far out (I booked this appointment with him for the initial screening over a year ago).
This diagnosis is good. It means that there’s something to be worked with, that it’s somewhat treatable and I can begin to make changes to feel more normal and become more active, instead of being trapped in a body that faints at the first sign of strenuous activity. One of those changes is to get compression stockings that will help prevent blood from pooling in my legs.
These compression stockings I’ve been prescribed are medical grade. You can’t get them over the counter. They’re 40-50mmHg, they’re not like something you’d get at a sporting goods store. We have to buy them from a store an hour away from my house. You have to be measured for them so they fit correctly and compress enough but not too much.
They’re $300 each.
My insurance deductible is $300 for medical grade equipment. We don’t have that kind of out of pocket money right now. We’re considering getting lower grade compression just so that I have something, because it’ll improve my quality of life, but even those can run $90-$150, and we don’t have a prescription for that so insurance won’t cover it. I’m not saying we’re suffering or that I can’t do without it. It seems I’ve lived with this condition for many years, and I’m going to live with it for many more. But it’d be nice to have these because my doctor told me 5 things that would improve my quality of life 85% and help me keep up with other people my age, and this is one of those things.
If you have POTS, I’d love to get to know you and learn more information about living with this. If you don’t have POTS but know about me, I would really appreciate it if you helped me out by supporting me on ko-fi or on patreon. I can’t give you anything in return. I don’t have the energy for that. But you’ll have my unending gratitude and probably some tears as well.
Anyway, that’s an update on my life and an explanation for why I’ve been so absent. If you have any questions about my medical conditions, please feel free to ask. I’m very open about my experiences with them. Thanks, I love you all.
Talon
37 notes
·
View notes
Text
I guess no more Once - A - Day, I’ll just keep shared learning and knowledge to myself, for right now, until I have peers and classmates again.
But one thing that I did find funny,
was that on the news, NYC took up the term “Blended Learning”
something we @ UNLV had been doing and labeled it as such a mix of online and in classroom learning. ( I also looked into the types of effective learning, something for a paper or something)
So as for “shared learning,” I mean unless we’re business partners or something, I can only INFORM you of a new product or innovation through advertising or word of mouth that I’m offering a new service and/or product.
I just got an update, in which Bayer is a partner in this content :
ugh I'm going to have to ignore this "nope," virus and move on anyways, I'm not exactly sure what it is but I don't have the time and/or resources to figure it out.
Vitamins, even though its a good preventative measure,
as this statement is approved : "Prevention is better than cure, and improved knowledge of our bodies is helping people stay healthier for longer."
It's stated, "medicines are the most common medical intervention but making them is expensive and reassuringly difficult."
Question : Then why do we need AI Elliot.
Because, well we can look at how the political system in Singapore is constructed... I Mean, it was said to be a good system, but after a global pandemic, and a city emergency? I'd need to be updated in how it held up and what losses occurred if any happened, afterwards of something like COVID19, to make any opinions about the strength of the structure in how they innovated their system into a smart city metropolis. \]\
But we would need AI, in case of an emergency if we were to shutdown a government service, even temporarily? AI would need to override its system and act as a functioning human behind a computer, if for say, I call a number and it's an automated voice system, and I press "2" for DMV records, such as is whats needed to to verify residency at UNLV or any college?
That it would act on behalf of a human, and mail me the records,
which would mean building a conveyor belt system that grabs the envelope,
prints the document, seals it, stamps it/meters... and in its system, logs that it sent me out the request,
then the USPS, scans it, receivable,
put in the pile for
hold on
when I Was in the garage, I heard a door shut,
I thought it was my pops,
so I just \now checked outside but it wasn't
must have been the neighbor.
but okay now that document is in the mail,
now (we are not creating autonomous cars for this, we can't) the mailman, is ready for its delivery.
that's how one year (I read this on Microsoft News just prior to my attending UNLV my first half semester there) we saved countless of lives, by sending out a piece of mail to americans via the IRS.
but when I went outside, just now...
it felt empty.
it sometimes just feels empty,
it doesn't feel like, full of vibes and aura as it did when I locked myself in my room at UNLV looked out the window and it was... idk like, happy go lucky world, even 2 girls were laying on the grass just down below, they got up, laughing.
but for some things, even just that, in emergency services if something happened, we would need AI for things we cannot do and/or calculate such as repurpose existing drugs (as it does finding new flavors of beer, which is why... after I had the desire to create a new energy drink, i had this funny feeling that it created 2 new flavors : Silver can of 3D and a 1000 BCAA Rockstar) like as for the anti-depressant that could help combat lung cancer.
some people are in pain, and first we need to make it so that it is tolerable, life and comfort of living.
if people need jobs?
then I mean, me studying science and, the elements in how to create and make something, is needed but it seems as if we're so far into the future, it's already achieved and successed, such as the UAE, one 3d printing company found a material that in which they can make microbial surfaces, to adapt to the COVID19 epidemic, which makes it possible to create surfaces for construction that are less susceptible to germs and it's multiplying of the germ cells.
"so why do you need chemistry, Elliot."
are you really going to out my wanting and desire of a high-cost project someday? we'll have everybody looking into it, like...
okay if you found gold.
a gold mine.
would you tell everybody hey guys I found a gold mine?
its here .
probably not.
some of the elements are rarer than gold.
which makes it very expensive,
but if I found how to duplicate it, and then commercialize it into manufacturing by finding out how to find or build an ecosystem that is sustainable for its reproduction and growth / I would.
that's why geography is important,
but as for if you need jobs?>
3d printing is important
and that's where DOW chemical comes in,
you'd have to speak with them,
and newly graduates,
for example, as I requested 10,000 units of one item/product a few months ago?
im not sure how many jobs it would create and for how long, but it would give purpose, and I found that when I lost purpose or it felt as if my efforts wouldn't be noticed? I lost it. broke down. I felt even more lonely.
so I have samples of a product/item and I need to open the box still.
but I have lots of faith in it,
and I love the idea of it,
but we need to do this as a whole,
but in a free market economy,
I mean... i can read the forgotton man , and explain how to overcome a monopoly, but , will you read it? and will it apply to you? probably not, but some things are common sense, as i explained to cortana when I was trying to configure her human genome :
did you need to be told about Newton's law and that what goes up, must come down?
or did you already know that gravity exists, before you were told of the person who came up with the theory in order for the explanation to be approved?
\
adminelliot
stepa1.com
ohboyblessed.com
[email protected]
[email protected]
IG : adminelliot
1 note
·
View note
Text
Selphia Haven: How it Began
Just over a year ago, I decided to make Selphia Haven. I would like to believe most blogs are made just for fun, or in order to show support and love for a special niche.
This blog was originally made for a different purpose.
Please note that my story may hold some triggering subjects for people. Please read at your own risk.
It was February of last year when I realized I had depression, but the seeds of it started to plant a lot earlier. For example, I think the hopelessness in my life started around the time that the Charlottesville white nationalist protest was being covered. News stories like this are shocking, and unbelievably scary, for a young adult who is trying to find their way in life.
I had always tried to desperately hold onto the belief that everyone, everywhere, can love and care for each other if they are either given the right knowledge or the right opportunities. I had originally picked up this belief as a child, and wanted to grow up to become a writer who would share stories with kind messages. I pursued a passion for writing all the way up until university, wherein I discovered psychology. My area of focus switched from becoming a writer to becoming a counsellor. I was going to help people, to become someone that could help manifest hope and love within people who had lost their way.
News stories like white nationalism, and similar hateful topics, made that hope slowly slip away from my fingers.
It was a slow fall. I don't remember what happened, exactly, between the Charlottesville protests and February of last year that really wore down my hope. But, by the time the Parkland school shooting happened, all that hope disappeared. The last shred of my love for the world was gone.
What are you supposed to do in life when all this terrible, terrible stuff happens in places that you cannot directly impact? Things far worse than you can imagine, to people far younger than you might think. Watching on a TV screen, you can distance yourself; pretend it doesn't happen. But you know. You know that these terrible things are someone's reality. Someone, somewhere, has to deal with each and every one of these realities that pop up on our news stations. And you can do nothing to help it.
I didn't do much from February onwards. I ate. I slept. I still went to school and worked. But it was...robotic? Everything just kind of happened. Nothing held purpose or meaning. Assignments were just assignments. Work was just work. Food was just food. And sleep was never enough.
My love for my future career was gone. I no longer wanted to be a counsellor, because I couldn't bear to deal with it. I couldn't bear to think that I would be facing these realities every single day—talking with people who had gone through losses of loved ones, suicide attempts, rape, abuse, and so much more—and yet could not provide a source of hope for them. How do you find hope for others when there are stories out there that tell us that everything bad is still happening, right now, right here, in this moment? I could be murdered next week by simply being in the wrong supermarket when a terrorist walks in and starts shooting.
I hadn't exactly contemplated suicide. Another belief I held on to was that, no matter what happens, every step alive is still a step in a growing direction. I would not commit suicide; but I was starting to think about it a lot more. For example: What it would be like to die. And, well, how long it would take for this belief to slip from my fingers just as quietly as my previous belief on the love in the world did. How long would it be before I actually started contemplating it. How long would it be before I actually committed it. What would it take for me to believe that death would be the "best option."
What got me moving wasn't through some miraculous determination. It was fear. I didn't want to die— It scared me to even be thinking about it. I still loved things in this world. My family. My friends. I actually did like school, and though I had been viewing my schoolwork at this time a mostly assignments, I did want to continue learning about the mysteries behind psychology. It was more than just the big things, there were also simple things I wanted to live for. I love ice cream. I love the smell of vanilla. I love the feel of the sun. I love the feel of the rain too, actually, and you can't feel these things, smell these things, taste these things when you're dead.
I wanted to stay alive. I wanted to still laugh at things. I had more funny videos I wanted to watch. More books I wanted to read. There are things in this world that I haven't even heard of yet that I want to stay for and experience in the future. I wanted to write. Oh my god, I wanted to write so much. I would write without end when I was in high school, but gave it up when I started pursuing psychology. I never got back to it because I felt I wasn't good enough, but I still wanted to do it.
All these lovely things that I wanted to do, and see, and experience...
But no effort to give.
I was tired, always. Constantly. My motivation to do anything outside of "the mandatory" (School, work, etc.) was nonexistent. I wanted to write, but every sentence I wrote looked ugly, or wrong, or faulty in some way. I wanted to go out for walks, but I also didn't want to get up and out of my room. I wasn't confident in anything I did; including the things I did at school and work.
I just needed something though. I wanted to do something. Anything.
I didn't start Tumblr for Selphia Haven specifically; I started it to look at funny pictures of animals (see also: an escape from reality). But it seemed like an inviting website to find...something to do on it. It wasn't limiting like on Twitter where I could only have, like, one blog per email. Tumblr gives the opportunity to try many different blogs, if you choose to pursue many different niches.
So, something small, then. I wanted to do something small. Not something meaningful; just something that would motivate me to get out of bed and do...something outside of the mandatory. It was here that I discovered something that seemed easy enough: incorrect quote blogs. In fact, I was so interested in hearing random, funny quotes that I even follow blogs for fandoms I have never seen anything from (eg. Voltron, Harry Potter, Mystic Messenger).
RF4 wasn't my first stop, but seeing as Pandora Hearts and Vanitas no Carte already had frequently updating incorrect quotes blogs, I had to find some other fandom that didn't quite have an incorrect quote blog yet. And... Well, Rune Factory did have one before I started. @overheard-at-selphia existed a few months before I walked in. However, they seemed to only be updating maybe once or twice a month. I thought for a day about whether they might be open to sharing the spotlight with me. Then, I decided that, what the hell, I'll just do it and if they aren't a fan of it, they can always just message me and tell me to shut up.
(I still follow @overheard-at-selphia too. They still update sometimes. It makes me happy.)
On June 14th, 2018, I made my first awkward post.
I made a commitment to myself then: I would make 5 posts a day. They were easy enough to make (this was, of course, before I started adding images) so this kind of goal was realistic for me. Also, I was in the heat of summer, so I didn't have schoolwork to worry about. The queue system still saves me to this day; I don't need to worry when I know I have a busy week coming up, because I can just fill it up when I have effort, and then let it run on my "off days".
Small motivations included just a handful of notes per post, and a handful of followers that gave me incentive to continue moving. Followers meant that people were relying on me to continue making posts. I couldn't just stop without reason; this little project was my own, but I created it to be my own meaningful "mandatory project".
Five little posts a day. Gradually, gradually, gradually, I discovered some courage to try something new. I created the picture incorrect quotes through a small burst of motivation in November, and the results had been astounding. I went from getting maybe 10 notes per post (If I was lucky) to around 20-50 notes per post. And that's not even counting this fukkin monster of a post that exploded straight outta nowhere.
Three posts a day. Gradually, gradually, gradually, I discovered some new courage. Gradually, gradually, gradually, I started writing again. Gradually, gradually, I wrote something. I finished writing something. I actually posted something I wrote; just over one year of Selphia Haven's existence.
I'd love to be able to say life is better now, but I can't really say that for certain. I'm not really sure if things will be okay, and I can't make promises about life when news stories are just as depressing as they have ever been. I have no grand answers for the mysteries that plague our existence; why are we alive and what's the point in all this. And, really, none of the problems that caused my depression have really been "solved" (I still don't want to be a counsellor anymore and I haven't found a different career path yet, for example).
But...I dunno. I'm enjoying this. Making Selphia Haven. It may not be a grand, exuberant show that's going to cure depression or save the children or give starving people food, but... It's my little effort. It's my little attempt at making a bit of light. A little bit of laughter in this dark world. I think we all need that— A little bit of something that gives us light. For me, that was creating Selphia Haven. Making a little effort of my own to (hopefully) make someone smile— Even if it's just a little smile. If my existence on this Earth is just to bring a small smile to your face, well... I guess that makes it worth it for me to continue, right?
That's why I'm so eager to promote any kinds of Rune Factory blogs you guys make, actually. It was me gaining those first few followers that motivated me to continue my first small steps... Gradually, gradually, gradually, I hope that those who start small can grow into something larger too. That people have something small that they can love, or create, or follow along with.
But, I also realize that, you know, not everyone experiences depression in the same way, right? My depression was helped because I had something small I could do every day. No story is the same; but I hope that if you do want to try out making a blog like mine, you will allow me to advertise it for you.
This...maybe isn't a super uplifting story, but hey. It's my story, and it seems to be working out for me so far. I'm happy with it. I'm happy that I'm writing again. And I'm going to continue making gradual steps towards the future too, which might lead me to something bigger. Who knows.
...But I hope I can finish Castle to the West, at least. Writing that story makes me really happy. So... I guess I hope you all continue your small steps to find that thing that makes you happy too. And if you need help, please ask for help! I’d be happy to give you my support!
42 notes
·
View notes
Text
So it’s been a while, huh?
I don’t know how many people are actually still following this blog/are interested in it but...hi again! I already wrote a post sort of explaining where I disappeared to and why (long story short: it was tumblr staff’s fault) but I also want to talk to you guys properly and update you all on what’s been going on since.
I don’t want to abandon this blog but I have another blog that I’m using now -> it’s @alwaysahiccupandastrid. It’s not as Beasts oriented as this one was, I’m afraid, but still feel free to follow it and chat to me! It’s much like this blog was when I used it in that I don’t really post exclusively for one fandom, it’s just a mix of whatever I like!
Anyway, updating! I already told you guys that I graduated university in July, finished my degree...that was stressful! A lot went down at university but it sorted itself out in the end and I survived! Our final assessment was at the end of May, and we performed a show that we created four times, three nights and one matinee. I’m very proud of what we achieved all things considered! But yes...I am no longer a university student!
What else has changed?
I no longer work for the cinema anymore - I quit a few weeks ago after getting a job at a fancy hotel that was supposedly better...I quit the day after my first shift because I had a “me too” experience with another employee...without too much detail, he touched and started kissing me, and I left. I struggled for a couple of weeks trying urgently to get a new job, and I’m now working for Superdrug! My first shift was Wednesday afternoon/evening and I’m excited to start properly! It’s not permanent: I’m also hoping to hear back from Nikon soon about an admin position that’s closer to home and pays extremely well!
I no longer see that therapist who likes Harry Potter - I think I talked a little bit on here about my counsellor who was also a Harry Potter fan and who I liked? Yeah...turns out not so much? I stopped going to her because she a) screamed at me for waiting in the waiting room until my bus was due to arrive down the road and b) she got pissed because I couldn’t do a few certain weeks due to show rehearsals. I’m honestly all the better for it frankly.
More tattoos! - Okay so it’s not a super important thing but it’s a change so...! I think when I was last on his blog I had 3 tattoos - I now have 8! So in addition to the wand, the “worrying means you suffer twice”, and the Deathly Hallows symbol, I now have a tattoo of Leta’s flower from the Lestrange family tree (with her name and the words “beautiful. Separate.”; a tiny tattoo of Harry’s scar/glasses; a Night Fury/Toothless tattoo with the words “heart of a chief” and “soul of a dragon”; the Chief symbol from HTTYD 2; and the words “Night Fury” in Viking runes.
My hair?! - Again, not important but hey! Let’s celebrate! My hair finally grew back and is now blonde! It’s not too long, just about to my shoulders, and my roots are dark blonde whilst the bottom is more bright blonde from dying it in March. It’s silly but hooray!
I met Kevin Guthrie in March! - I met Mr Abernathy himself at Comic Con in London and he was LOVELY. He was such a wonderful man, so cheerful and amazing with the fans. I had some pretty interesting conversations with him about Fantastic Beasts and whether he’ll be in the next one...we shall see! He also told us that Poppy Corby-Tuech (Vinda Rosier) is “all about the cosplay”! And ofc I got some photos with him :)
I’m now 21 - my birthday was obviously in January and I’m old(er) 😂😭 I didn’t do anything too special, just saw CoG with the family and then a few days later went to the WB Studio Tour again (which was amazing because my sister has a friend who works there and was showing us props lots of people won’t ever see!)
Mental Health crap - Obviously I’m not “cured” or anything. I’m still on Sertraline for my depression (haven’t taken the anxiety one for a while but that is a whole other kettle of fish!) and I still have problems but I’m not as low as I have been these past few years on this blog. I’m proud to say that I have been self-harm free since about March or April (it’s hard to remember since the months blur together), and I’m genuinely all the better for it! Part of it is because I didn’t want to damage my tattoos on my arms but it’s also because I’ve managed to resist the urge as well!
^ Having said that, I’m on the waiting list to see a doctor/specialist because my GP said there was a possibility I could have autism/Aspergers/be on the spectrum. It’s a LONG waiting list in the UK so it could be a while until I see a specialist, but there’s that. It’s not a bad thing necessarily since it might be a step closer to making sure I get the exact treatment/help I need.
Fandom junk - I already mentioned in my earlier posts that since late February/early March, I’ve gotten REALLY into How To Train Your Dragon. It’s now my main fandom, in fact, which is sad because the last film has come out and there’s just a half an hour Christmas special left to be released this winter 😭 but HTTYD has had such an impact on my life and my mental state, like it has genuinely made me so much happier and (in my opinion) a better person. I still love Fantastic Beasts and Harry Potter (I even went to King’s Cross at the beginning of the month for Back to Hogwarts Day!) but it’s not my main fandom right now; I had to take a breather from Beasts and the Beasts fandom because it’s really not a great place to be at times. But I’m still into it and I’m waiting for the third film to come out in 2021!
Other random/rather unimportant stuff:
My bed is now overrun with Build a Bear dragons (and the odd baby Niffler)
My sister turned 18 and I’m so...old? I feel so old now omg
I’ve been trying to help the environment by taking little steps like going out litter picking (both on my own and with my dad) whenever I can, and I’ve been using the Ecosia search app as much as possible (for every 45 searches, they’ll plant a new tree!)
I went to Disneyland Paris again in June and it was a lot of fun, I met Peter/Wendy/Alice/Mad Hatter again, there was a false alarm because some twat left their bag at the meet and greet so they had to get the sniffer dog and everything, and I also met Donald Duck, Stitch, Tiana/Naveen AND Rapunzel (Rapunzel is my sister’s absolute favourite, so I’m happy she got to meet her!)
This may be super lame but I got so happy because I got noticed on Twitter several times by Jay Baruchel (the guy who plays Hiccup in How To Train Your Dragon - he’s so awesome and loves the character btw), his fiancée who’s a model keeps liking some of my posts on Instagram, and Cressida Cowell, who wrote the original How To Train Your Dragon books (which are vastly different to the movies but omg they’re so amazing?!), liked a tweet I sent her about my Toothless tattoo and she loved it?! I’m having a good year celebrity/famous people wise for some reason?! 😂❤️
I dont know if my blog was still in use when this happened but I’ll mention it anyway... I SAW EZRA AGAIN IN DECEMBER!! I went to watch Sons of an Illustrious Father play in London and it was GLORIOUS. Ezra Miller is GLORIOUS.
(I won’t post pictures of all the stuff here but... soon maybe?)
So that’s all I can think of...it’s been so long since I used this blog and I felt bad just abandoning it, so here we are.
I don’t know how much I’ll still use this blog, but as I said, I definitely don’t want to just abandon it. At the moment, I’m logged into this account on my iPod and onto my account on my phone, and I think I’ll keep it that way. I don’t know how much posting I’ll do here but I’ll still be around, and I’ll try to see if I can keep this blog alive alongside my current one, if people want me to!
I hope you guys are doing well, and I’m glad to have this blog back. Even if you follow my new blog and have been for the last few months, it’s still awesome to be talking to guys again on this account!
If you guys want to chat or say anything, feel free! Like I said, if people still want me to be active on here then just let me know and I’ll do my best! ☺️
18 notes
·
View notes
Text
Introduction:
Hi, my name is Damaya. I’m an 11th grader at Lawndale High School. Now, I’m sure you guys have heard of the Coronavirus lately. It’s been the topic of discussion for I’d say about 2 months now. In my blog, I’ll be discussing the effects of which Covid-19 has on our society today.
Alright hey guys! So, it is March 21st and earlier this morning at 12:00am, it was announced by the California Governor issues statewide lockdown for 8 weeks or more possibly. The reasoning for the lockdown is to prevent the coronavirus from spreading even more and to keep people safe. This is crazy! I don’t go back to school until May 1st (for now). I’ll update you guys more once I find out anything else about Covid 19.
What are your thoughts on the government putting the United States on lockdown? Are they doing it to protect us? Some people believe this whole thing is a hoax for something that might be happening in the future.
Do you believe the California will open in May or by the end of the year considering how bad the outbreak is?
Recently, Atlanta reopened their parks, beaches, stores, etc. This should be a good sign that COVID-19 is being controlled.
If you lived in Alanta, would you go outside right when they announced that places are reopening?
This Pandemic has affected many people and their families. Many parents have lost their jobs due to the coronavirus spread and in result have lost their homes due to bills not being paid and money not being made. Many families aren’t able to afford food because of lack of money. Not only are the parents going through hard times, but children are too. Let’s take into consideration all the children who are suffering from any mental illnesses such as depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, ptsd, etc. staying quarantined and isolated can trigger any episode or outbreak. Now that schools have shut down, these children don’t have an escape. This pandemic is affecting everyone.
Do you believe schools should reopen considering these children’s mental disorders? Do you believe parents should get their jobs back, but take safety precautions?
Often people believe the coronavirus was blown out of proportion due to the media. People say that if it weren’t for the media, we would still be outside and places would still be open. Do you believe this? In my opinion, I don’t. I believe the media is in face a good resource, without it we wouldn’t really know much about the coronavirus and it’s spread. Although I do think that the media does lie about some of the statements about how the coronavirus is spread, who it can affect, and whether there’s a cure or not, I do believe that the media also says a lot of truth about the coronavirus too.
What do you think about the media and it’s effect on society’s way of thinking?
Now, there are many lessons we can learn about this crisis. Like safety precautions. A lot of people don’t wash their hands as often as they should or don’t sneeze into their arm, sanitize shopping carts, etc. I believe after this virus dies down we should all take these same measures and stay clean. We shouldn’t just wash our hands when the coronavirus is going around and then stop once it’s over, that’s how it spreads. So remember once this is all over, please wash your hands, don’t touch your face, and STAY CLEAN.
So since I’m going through this pandemic with you all, I’ve been doing some interesting things at home to keep me occupied. I’ve been working out. We can get carried away in eating and being lazy that we lose ourselves in all of this. Working out keeps me healthy while also distracting me from all the nonsense. I’ve been doing daily stretches. Stretching allows me to get in a state of mind that calms me which helps a lot because then I’ll feel good throughout the rest of the day. Everyday I get up and shower and change into a new set of clothes because what happens when you sit at home in the same pair of clothes is you start to feel horrible and uncomfortable with yourself. When you get up and get dressed, your day feels complete and so do you. I’m not saying you have to get all dolled up, but just showering and changing into a new pair of clothes will definitely help you feel good. I’ve been taking my dogs on walks down my block and of course making sure I keep my distance from other people. Since most of the parks and beaches are closed, I still like to take my dogs on walks down the block, it also helps me get some exercise in for the day. So those are some of the things I do to help me stay productive through this time! What are some of the things you do?
COVID-19 pandemic has raised many controversy with ethnicity. Let’s discuss it! In China, they are using Africans as a test dummy to test their vaccines. I can say, I’m not surprised about this because Africans/Black people get discriminated against daily. In Africa they are also testing vaccines on Africans for the coronavirus without their consent. This is not okay. Testing someone for a vaccine without their consent is not okay. Theirs also a lot of things going on with minorities like Hispanics as well. Many Hispanics work jobs such as housekeeping, landscaping, or working jobs that require being outside and interacting with people. This means that many Hispanics have lost their jobs due to their work of working with others. This means that they’re losing money, losing their jobs, and losing their homes.
This Pandemic is one of the most historical moments in history and one of the worst. This pandemic is worse than the 1918 flu.
What caused this virus was from an animal being consumed in China that had the coronavirus. It the. Spread to humans throughout China. The market that was selling these animals was then shut down. The Covid-19 virus killed thousands of people in China. Since people like to travel. Many people with the virus who didn’t know they had it would travel from China to the U.S. and back, contracting the virus to the United States and vice versa. The affect this virus had on the entire world is that it caused many people to get sick or even die and caused the United States to go on lockdown for months.
I would like to recommend anyone who is going through this pandmenic to stick together with your families. Be sure to do things to keep you occupied such as painting, working out, meditating, etc.
I will also like to add in the Donald Trump recently advised people to inject Lysol and bleach into our system...all I have to say is don’t do it! Please.
1 note
·
View note
Text
Life updates
First off, the fact that there is still shit in the queue is amazing.
Anyway, a lot had happened in the past couple of months. I don't feel like sharing much of it, but what I will say for anyone who cares is that I'm starting therapy. While the antidepressants definitely help, they just cure me of the most pressing issue. I still have a ten-year gap in my "human resume" where wasn't even a person - that's the time where you're growing up and coming of age and all of my energy was spent just trying not to kill myself before tomorrow. Something kept me going all of those years (which I've already touched on in previous posts) but it wasn't a lust for life, or a hope for the future.
But regardless, I'm still here, and I still don't know who I am, or what I want, or how to deal with some of the new emotions I couldn't feel when I was blocked by depression. So I'm going into therapy in order to receive as much help as I can get in navigating my character/in the world--even though I truly don't believe I have a personality.
I'm also going to get re-assessed for NPD somewhere down the line. I feel like the traits I had were just being exacerbated by depression, and the diagnosis I received was clouded. A major reason why I haven't been posting anymore is because I don't experience many of the symptoms at high enough degrees to cause distress anymore:
Constructive criticisms sting, but I now use them to better myself so I won't make that mistake again - being seen as competent is a new source of supply, and it's a positive sublimation in my eyes. I no longer feel a compulsion to be the best.
Oftentimes I still need validation, but I try to seek it out through the parts of myself I believe are most genuine - I've been working on needing to be loved and appreciated by others.
Insults that usually would've haunted me for weeks pretty much just slide off my back these days.
I've started getting warmer towards my friends. It's not 100% an act anymore.
There are some things that have increased, like I've become much much more self-absorbed. I didn't really even recognize people as persons before and I certainly almost never do now. Apathy levels have increased, and I still very much so feel that existential boredom we all know too well.
But I've been working on my mental/physical health and I'm okay so far. I'm starting to become okay with myself.
For anyone who followed me for NPD/Cluster B shit, there probably might not be any of that anymore. Sorry to you guys, because some of my favorite mutuals were a part of that community. For anyone who followed me for anything else, I'm not too sure on how much I'll be posting anymore. Tumblr was always a coping mechanism for me; I was never on here if I was happy. I'm not saying I'm happy now (not by a longshot) but I don't really have thoughts that I fear nobody hears anymore.
If you've read this far, then thank you. And until next time,
- Malachi
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
fuck the brain
so for this update, we are going to break it up. make it a little easier...well somewhat..so are going to break over so ill play the OCD card and have sub-categories (:
With that said let’s get started <3
1. Health-- so I think as I have discussed at the beginning of this blog I explained that I have epilepsy and I hate admitting that. I am embarrassed beyond words with it. I use to be a social butterfly, and now the idea of going out to the world and being apart of other things is a little nerve-racking to me. Before July in 2019, we thought that I wasn't going to have any more seizures that it was all fixed and I was “cured” for a better lack of words, I haven't had a seizure for almost 3 years so life was looking good. Now with that said before we all get excited and we try to figure all are asking questions, my neurologist, dr. g requested an EEG in the beginning of the year because I came I told them that I have not been taking my medicine for about 6 months and have been doing just fine. the reason being for this is because I was just simply at first was forgetting then I got didn't have a certain amount so I got behind and then it just turned into me not taking them. Well, when we had the EEG I still had the abnormal brainwaves (a quick explanation on EEG’s..pretty much a helmet of little wires they hook to your head and it tells you what kind of brain waves you have). Not my best day. So I had a seizure back in July I assumed because I was depressed from what learned in April I was taking care of my body, I was sleeping well, not doing the best with my body. Then I had one about 2 weeks ago, after that, I have been anxiety attacks whenever I please, my depression is flying off the walls. So now my neurologist has decided that I need to have a service dog for these reasons. I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety a couple of years back, but it was never this bad as it is now. so now me having to even think about having a service is kind of hard, because I’ve always been embarrassed with the idea of just almost anyone knowing about it. like if I didn't have to tell a friend about it then I won't. there's been soo many timeeeesss that I thought i have told a friend and then something will happen that it would come up and they wouldn't know a thing about it.
-Love: alrighty so this subtext will be fun. so y’all remember daffy? well, we’re pretty much still in that sloth relationship that I was explaining. and since we still can't think of a better word we’re going to stick with that until I say otherwise alright? good glad we agreed. so when I had my last seizure I was with him and about as close as I could get with a person while having a seizure. he was laying on top of me when it happened. yeahhhh good moment for the sloth and lady sloth right? well, I could remember after it was waking up hurling on his favorite sweater that I was wearing at the time barely getting to the sink and hurling all over that than falling on the floor and wanting to die. then I remember barely opening my eyes, daffy was standing over me he cleaned up my throw up, this is going to be so cheesy but I thought he has to be prince charming he's going to clean up this shit off of me. then he took off the throw up sweater off of me put on a different shirt and carried me to his room. next thing I know i wake up and I don't really remember the rest. I remember bits and pieces but that's about it. I just remember thinking that he may not be perfect and he might have a shitty past, him and I are overly different, but he just might the prince charming I was looking for. bad boy in skinny jeans with a sailor's mouth and can be an asshole sometimes but makes me smile no matter what and makes me feel safe and all these other things that do not fall into this subtext.
-Friendship-- when my friend cotton found out that I had a seizure he didn't really do a whole bunch of what I friend is supposed to do I believe, I mean when my friends have found out in the past they freak out are wanting to know if I'm okay did I die asking weird questions. but cotton he just didnt. and it really pissed me off! and he’s supposed to be my best friend, but he hasn't been one lately. I'm not liking it.
-School-- the school hasn't gotten scary now. my teachers are really supportive but I feel so far behind and I cant remember. and this is the shit part. my neurologist thinks the reason why I'm having such a hard time remembering is that I have PTSD so he is wanting me to go to PSYCHIATRIST..arent those for people who are really fucked up in the head or something? I would see why but I'm not excited about it. maybe I can talk may out of it. I've gone to a therapist before and it did me no good. if anything it did me worse. but now I'm so scared to anything with school because what if I fail what if something goes wrong and it stresses me out so much that I have a seizure or have such a bad anxiety attack that I have a seizure.
2. Friendship/Love- so I was going to split up these two categories but since they collide each other by a lot it would get way too confusing so this seemed easier at the end of the day.
So as you could guess this will have to do with cotton and daffy. pretty fun combination. especially since they both don't like each other. which is super fun. so with that said, cotton since the beginning has talked bad about daffy. and I would just ignore it usually, especially since he would just be talking about his past mainly and I really wouldn't care because when daffy would say anything about he would calmly say its in the past in the past for a reason. he's done that he’s not proud of, was he the best person back then probably not, would probably want to be around him..probably not, but then again knowing bigbangcowgirl lets just 2-3 years ago she would probably still go for it. but daffy just never talked about cotton even though he didn't like him, he knew that he was my best friend he wouldn't. cotton would, I ignored for the most part. there was something I would question, but then daffy would bring down somewhere along the yellow brick road and i would be just fine once again. with my past of shit guys. daffy has been so straight forward and not hidden anything from it so relaxing and he’s been so trustworthy! Cotton has been such a bad friend and it just took me yesterday to put two and two together after daffy was pointing out something towards me and then yesterday I just don't trust him anymore. I'm really pissed. I know my mom and cotton talk and i told her last night when I got done coaching to not talk to him anymore for awhile. I don't want you to talk to him. I don't trust him right now. he's my friend, but I don't like how he’s been treating me and seems to be manipulating you and putting up this front to you and dad.
-Family- those last two sentences kind of collided with this sub-category but that’s fine. so me and daffy decided that we wouldn’t meet my parents for a while cause that would just make it official and legit serious, like would be switching from sloth to penguins. if y’all don't know what that means, I can’t help you. go to google. which was fine by me. I'm a daddy’s girl some even telling my dad about nick was already a little scary. I didn't want my dad to meet another guy I've been seeing for a while until I knew it was going to be serious and would last, so he would stop meeting these pos kind of guys. Well with daffy, they’re outstandingly opposite. like its crazy different. it's kind of funny though. but what gives me the slightest bit of hope is that daffy makes me happy, he takes care of me, he wants me to be happy, for an example, he could’ve cared less if my parents didn’t like him, but since he knows that a big thing to him, it bothers him and he wants to fix it. my father thinks that he doesn’t make me happy just because the only time I have been on the phone with daffy these past couple of days when I was the house we were bickering about stuff. so yeah, if that's your first opinion I could see why, but what he doesn't know is that I've been on the phone with him multiple times, been texting him multiple times, been smiling because of him multiple times, but because I didn't want my dad to know that he existed because of our sloth-like relationship I just said it was cotton cause my dad knows that he’s in n. carolina and there's no way in hell I will be leaving texas just for some boy.
now then, I don't really think my dad will ever like any boy I am with. just for the fact of him thinking no man is good enough for my little girl fact. which is fine I understand that. no biggie. I agree. I'm adorable. but if he has respect for daffy, understands that daffy cares about me respect me, doesn't hurt me emotionally/physically like any other guy has in the past, and makes me happy. then I know that’s all that matters to him.
and another perk is that my mom loves him. she is a little concerned cause she knows that he is a bad boy and has a bad past, but she knows that she he has done what he needs to do make him improve and make him a better man. also now that I have pointed all that cotton has lied about and pulled off his mask that he’s been wearing. daffy doesn’t look bad anymore. now I say that because cotton has been trying to make daffy look bad by comparing those two together. which is one of the major things that I noticed yesterday. one of the biggest things that pissed me off the most.
sloth relationship, or penguin relationship. nobody is going to make my man look bad or talk shit about him especially if I know you and I know what you’re saying and your’ purpose behind it. not okay.
1 note
·
View note
Text
dear high self,
this is going to be a place for me to journal my high thoughts. enjoy.
(this will continuously be updated)
saturday, november 10. 1:31 AM
“is there a cure for depression?” - hold on. i’ll get back to this. i have too much to say.
saturday, november 10. 7:37 PM
watch this first to get a feel for where my mind’s at
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=thBR-83-2Mc&list=PL2etPlnTb9sXwY7EgbEdYcfpl4SOeek3_
on an episode of “kids meet” on youtube, kids among various ages met a suicide survivor. some of these kids are so young that when i was their age, i didn’t even know what that meant. as a preface, on this series of youtube videos, kids meet a variety of people that may be “different” to them, growing up in the current society. for example, one episode featured a drag queen. i was blown away by children’s responses. a few asked if the survivor was okay now, and another asked if they thought about their family. on a personal level, i have been at the point of planning out an attempt, of committing an attempt, of writing a goodbye, of saying goodbye. the children’s responses to the situation and story, blew me away and made me feel cared for. they showed true concern, they wondered what this human being was going through. a young boy, maybe between the ages of 6-8, asked “is there a cure for depression?” the suicide survivor immediately responded “there is not. unfortunately, there's no cure for any mental illness”. this conversation really spoke to me. such a simple statement, right? there is no cure. there is no cure for any mental illness. depression, anxiety, eating disorders, bipolar, there is no cure. why isn’t this talked about more? why isn’t this stressed more? depression is not just a mood. depression is not just feeling very sad. depression is a mental illness, in which there is no cure. having terrifying panic attacks where you think you’re having a heart attack, is not a mood. anxiety is a mental illness, it is not a mood, it is not cute, there is no reason for it to be glamorized. not being able to eat, let alone think about the smell, taste, texture of food without feeling like you need to starve for another day, is not cute. it is an eating disorder. it is an illness. there is no cure. there. is. no. cure. as much as we hope and pray for a cure to cancer, and as much as there being no cure devastates us... this devastates me. i will have these illnesses for the rest of my life. yes, i can go to therapy. yes, i can talk about my problems. yes, i can take medication to temporarily modify my feelings. yes i can work on eating and working out a normal amount and not obsessing over my weight. but at the end of the day, that is it. there just is no cure.
sunday, november 11. 2:03 AM
i feeeeeeel a lot of things right now. it’s all very overwhelming. its 2 AM, i have to be to work at 9 AM, and i have to say goodbye to my boyfriend before he goes back to college, at an unknown time tomorrow, or today. a lot of stuffs goin on. but, majorly... the talk we had tonight. he told me for a while, when he gets back, we need to talk. i knew we did. he knew we did. but i knew what we needed to talk about, what needed to be said. he had no idea. he wanted to know, for so long. and i did too. maybe this only makes sense in my mind. i talked. i told him. i confessed what’s been holding me back. myself. my insecurities. my mental illnesses. i have allowed myself to lose control, to myself. how pathetic. that’’s how a normal guy would react, right? not mine. he’s so good to me. he is so fucking good to me. i’ll never for a single day take this man for granite, not in this lifetime. i go from “guy” to “man” which is a very large gap, but to me he is. 18, and he’s a man. he’s wise beyond his years, he’s kind, and he has the biggest heart i’ve ever known of. but, most of all, he’s good to me. he’s good for me. he’s good with me. he gives me reason. and i don’t rely on him for my happiness, i know it needs to come from myself. and when he makes me happy, it comes from myself too. because he is the only person i’m comfortable around. i can by myself and not worry. i can feel myself. and he makes me feel good, because i let him. but then i shut down. and i tell him this, i open him up to the madness that is my god damn mind, and he still loves me. and tells me every time he will keep standing by me. my fucking god, i can’t imagine what i did to deserve him. we match so well... our minds, our souls, interests, thoughts... every fucking thing. i love him more than i knew one human being could love another. idk what this started as but it’s essentially just a love letter to my boyfriend. i will marry you. any time. any place. my heart is yours and yours only. i love and i like you.
friday, december 21. 2:36 am.
my thoughts exactly right now are disgust and hatred toward myself, and such a fucking strong lust for the life i want to live. i know everything i want. i know how to get it. i just need to fucking do it. i’m so depressed and no one even.. realizes? that blows my mind. you also hit rock fucking bottom you know, almost lost everything over something so stupid. and it was such a wakeup call. learn from it.
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
Okay ima level with y'all.
Sooooooo...
So um hey! Basically how I'm dealing with my shit rn^
I haven't been up to par with my updates. I keep making empty promises and that's getting boring. So ima tell yall what's been going down in my very boring life.
Okay so 5 years ago I had my first cancer scare. I was 13 when I found the lump on my hip, 14 when they cut it out and did all the tests. I've been for countless blood tests and scans- mostly ultrasounds so you can guess what rumours were spread about school.
I was then told after the results came back that I had a 50/50 chance of it being Lymphoma.
I spent the next 3 years showing improvements and then I found another lump on my hip. It was bigger and more painful. Fast forward to an emergency biopsy and testing to then find out it was, in fact, Hodgkins Lymphoma.
Out of all the cancers, Hodgkins is the best to get, it's easily treated and can be cured after your first bout of chemotherapy.
Anyways! I went through 6 rounds of chemo, took an allergic reaction to the first round of chemo and had to stay in the hospital overnight, had 4 hospital visits for chest infections, wasn’t allowed to leave the house for a week after chemo because of increased risk of infection and spent the entire time from the day I was diagnosed right up to a year later being mollycoddled by everyone. Now I’m just mollycoddled by my grandparents.
The reason I’m writing this is that I found yet another lump- I’ve had it for weeks but it’s getting bigger. It’s not any secret that I have bad anxiety or depression and believe me it’s desperately falling out of control because I am so up the wall right now with stress. I’m coming up 2 years remission. But with every lump I find I go into this spiral of “holy shit it’s happening again.”
I’m so sorry for not getting my updates up. Believe it or not I actually have stuff written but the flow is all over the place. Nothing is flowing in the right way. So my updates will come but they're just going hella slow. I’m waiting on hearing back from the hospital on what to do so hopefully I’ll hear back from them today or at least this week.
I just thought y’all should know what’s going on. I’ll try getting the second part of my maria fic done and up today or at least this week if not then it’ll probably be alot of headcanon stuff since I’ll be at the hospital possibly more than twice this week.
Thanks for taking the time to read this guys it really does mean a lot to me and I'm sorry that this isn't exactly the update you're expecting but life is a massive pile of a shit and this is only scratching the tip of the iceberg😂
#nemo's got problems#shits getting a little too real rn#please forgive me#im really sorry#updates to come#nemo updates are on the way#supergirl#marvel#dc#agents of sheild#aos#b99#brookyln nine nine#rosa diaz#amy santiago#alex danvers#kara danvers#lena luthor#little luthor#baby danvers#daisy johnson#melinda may#jemma simmons#its all a gay mess
22 notes
·
View notes
Text
Supernatural: Stranger in a Strange Land (14x01)
And we're back. Let's just dive right in.
Cons:
This was a perfectly serviceable episode, but it didn't have some of the high energy and epic moments and intense emotion that I'm used to from a Supernatural premiere. It's possible I wasn't in the right head space. I think part of the problem is that this show is really at its best when Sam and Dean are onscreen together, or rather when Jensen and Jared are onscreen together. As a necessary part of the story, we don't get that here.
I have been really forgiving of Samantha Smith's performance as Mary Winchester, but I've got to be brutally honest and say that she gives kind of a flat read, and she's often a bit unconvincing. Sam is so clearly devastated by what's happened to Dean, and Mary is supposed to be, too. It's just... not totally gripping me.
I don't ordinarily comment on the direction and editing, but the fight scene between Sam, Mary, Bobby, Jack, and the random girl whose name I haven't learned on one side, and random demons on the other was... badly edited. The pacing was weird, there was odd zooms ans slow-motion... it looked ridiculous. Bad fight choreography and editing and directing. Or at least one of those things.
At one point the Crowley wanna-be demon, Kip, points out that Cas is basically only good for being bait for the Winchesters. We've seen Cas do plenty of bad-ass things in the past, but it must be said that this show is pretty wildly inconsistent with Cas' capabilities. Sometimes he's totally competent, and other times he's kind of an idiot, getting himself into trouble and finding himself too weak to deal with stuff that Sam can take care of, no problem. I don't want Cas to be a joke!
Okay, one other note: The CW screwed up pretty big by trying to be clever with an advertisement. There was a commercial for the new Halloween movie with the famous character Michael, so they showed a clip of Sam asking Nick (Lucifer's vessel) about "Michael" so they could ease in to the commercial. The problem? This little clip came before we had seen Nick in the episode, and the moment when that happens was supposed to be a big reveal. We get Sam walking hesitantly into the room, we see a figure in shadow, and slowly we see that it's Mark Pellegrino's face. This "surprise" was totally undercut by the ad. Bummer.
Pros:
But while we're at it, let's talk about Nick, shall we? I can completely understand why a lot of people are less than thrilled to see Mark Pellegrino hanging around. It doesn't make a lick of sense, for one thing - how on earth did this vessel survive all of that? Also, is this just a way for Lucifer to stealthily come back at some point? Because that would really undercut a lot of the tension. All that said, I think Mark Pellegrino is a good actor, and I'm excited that we get to keep him around. They also seem to be taking Sam's past trauma seriously for once, as he is clearly very uncomfortable around Nick, seeing the face of his tormentor when he looks at him. Jared did a great job with that.
It's a little too early to say for sure, but I really like the potential with having the Apocalypse world people around. Now that Michael is terrorizing this dimension, maybe they will be able to go back home at some point and save their own world, but for the time being it's cool to have something of a bigger ensemble around. They hang out in the bunker, they make food, they go on organized hunts, planned and led by Sam Winchester. It's a totally different feel, and I'm really curious to see if they actually keep it up for a while instead of just doing a typical three-and-out thing like they usually do with shake-ups to the structure of the show. I think we can still do C-plot episodes with this gang around, and I hope we do. At any rate, it's definitely nice to have some version of Bobby back on the show!
Poor Jack. I love this kid and I feel for him so much. He's struggling without his grace. He feels useless, and no amount of pep talk from Sam or Bobby can fix that. However, he does come along with Sam on the mission to save Cas, and hopefully he will learn to see his value, separate from his powers. I'm thrilled that Jack has become such a big part of the show. I was so nervous about him at the beginning of last season, and now I just love him to pieces and hope he's around for the long haul. Hearing Sam try to comfort him gave me all the feels.
God. Sam. He's just devastated. He's exhausted, and stressed, he has a sexy depression beard, and he looks on the verge of bursting into tears at any second. We see how he's holding it together for the sake of the people around him. He's ordering troops around on vampire hunts, he's checking in on Jack, he's trying to help out Nick, he's going on rescue missions to get Cas back, all while barely holding on to his control.
I loved the moment in the car between Sam and Mary, when he tells her to stop with the empty platitudes that they'll be able to get Dean back, that Cas will be okay... Sam is hyper-aware of the fact that Dean is gone, that he has no idea where is brother is, if Dean is even alive. Of course Sam will never stop looking for him. Of course. But he doesn't want to keep pretending to be optimistic. We see how various characters are handling Dean being gone throughout the episode. But the final exchange we see is between Sam and Cas, both expressing that they would do anything in the world to get Dean back. Mary is Dean's mother, but the show appropriately shows us the two people in the world who Dean loves the most, the only two people who can truly understand each other's pain and fear. That's Sam and Cas, and I love that the show seems to know that.
Also, a quick update on how much of a bad-ass Sam Winchester has come to be: holy shit! He took down Kip, which was a relief (I don't want a knock-off Crowley, thanks much), and he literally shouted down the rest of the demons and got them to run scared. Sam Winchester has declared that there will be no new King of Hell, and it seems that at least for the moment, the demons are heeding that warning. Yes! You tell 'em, Sammy!
It was so strange to have a full episode of Supernatural without Dean Winchester in it. Jensen is doing a pretty good job playing Michael, although I did notice a few Dean mannerisms creeping in. I like that we didn't get too much Michael. His ultimate plan is still something of a mystery. He wants to understand people's motivations, and thus far he seems disappointed by what he views as humanity's hypocrisy. He finds Sister Jo, which means we got a fun scene between Jensen and Danneel, and it looks like Jo is, at least mostly, on the side of the angels. By which I mean not the angel Michael, but the good guys.
In the past, whenever we've had some big shake-up separating the brothers, we've gotten back to status-quo fairly quickly. Demon Dean was cured at the end of the third episode of the season. Sam and Dean were reunited immediately in episodes 4x01, 6x01, and 8x01, after their various deaths and resurrections/escapes. I mentioned that the energy of this show is best when Jensen and Jared share the screen. But at the same time, I would love to see them actually play the long-game here. What would it look like if Jensen Ackles actually played Michael until the midseason break? What would it be like if we actually waited until 2019 to see Sam and Dean reunite? It seems highly unlikely, but I do hope they stretch it out a little further than usual this time.
In all, this wasn't the strongest premiere ever, but Sam and Cas gave me enough good material, and there are various other little threads that look like they have the potential to be really cool in future!
7.5/10
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
JAMES’S CURATED QUALITY FANFICTION PRIMER
for @rev0lutions-of-ruin, who tumblr does not like letting me tag
foolish bird avoids ao3 for years and misses out on the Good Shit, but it will be okay! she has THIS now. ft. DUMB LONG-WINDED CAPTAIN AMERICA MOVIE EXPLANATIONS, because i don’t think you would watch those movies willingly.
lots of selection - pick and choose, but if you don’t read “out of the dead land” i will be very sad. just treat this as really weird queer genre fiction and you’ll be alright. fics with pornographic content are marked as such, but said content is easy to skip as long as you can pick up on the warning signs.
we’re gonna start with the funny stuff.
nanananana BAT-DAD! (no ships, just bruce being a dad. safe for work and hilarious,)
who needs therapy when you have microsoft excel.
tim drake (robin 3) is a transgender teenage disaster. and bruce wayne is just generally a disaster. (same series.)
okay, now let’s get kind of sad. but not TOO sad.
nananananananana BATMAN (and superman)
this one made watching batman vs. superman worth it. not quite. but kind of. it’s fantastic.
i forget what happens in this one but i know i enjoyed it!
snk? why this, james. why this.
bad show, i know, but. formative experience. i figured out i was trans by projecting my feelings onto jean kirchstein. (not sure how, that’s just what happened.)
this one is stupidly fucking huge, in first person, and still isn’t finished.
included by virtue of some weird nostalgia. it’s half a million words long. try the first few chapters; i can’t guarantee anything that happens. don’t fucking judge me.
boring, punch me in the feelings already. more angst!
STEVEBUCKY
i don’t think you’ve watched the captain america movies, so i will explain them.
the saddest, gayest shit you will ever see. will fuck with your heart, ideally! but (as per always), skip the porn. this fandom is really big on it. UGH.
BUT it’s based off of movie adaptations of comic books, so the backstory is... ridiculous. i will summarize it for you. (tumblr ate this so here goes again)
THE DYNAMIC/history/massive goddamn ship manifesto
two guys, sitting in the great depression, two feet apart because it’s not socially acceptable to be gay
steve: tiny, blonde, always mad and big on SOCIAL JUSTICE. gets into fights for SOCIAL JUSTICE, despite growing up in the great depression when SOCIAL JUSTICE was not a commonly-known phrase or a common thing. he’s a bit of a shit, and he gets into shit. with his scrawny lil fists. he has all sorts of chronic illnesses but somehow manages to survive in a time with shitty medicine, and grow up to get into MORE shit. likes art, but is (partially?) colorblind
also he’s VERY HEAVILY coded as trans.
bucky: taller, brown hair, very popular but secretly a bit of a nerd (loves scifi, and is good at math). likes dancing, girls, and getting steve out of situations that he’s clearly over his head in and talking shit about it after. a bit of a charmer, etcetera.
there are some good fics from this era (”pre-war”) but idk where they are in my bookmarks. will update later.
so wait, what happens?
bucky gets steve out of dumb situations (like fighting a guy for talking during a movie) for pretty much all of their life. childhood friends until after high school-ish.
BUT, bucky is either drafted into the us army (it’s wwii now) or enlists, and steve is left alone in brooklyn, new york, to get into shit, without anyone to bail him out or prevent him from getting into MORE shit. so he finally manages to lie his scrawny, ill ass into the army, and (as one does) volunteers to get experimented on by the american government.
wait, what the fuck
comic books, okay. don’t @ me.
steve manages not to die! he finds a really pretty, badass lady to bisexually fawn over in the army (peggy carter is a fucking miracle), the experiments are a success and he ends up BIG and cured of all his ailments and with superfast metabolism (no alcohol) and superfast healing. he’s made it! (he basically just got really fast, unrealistic HRT hahaha)
... except the army can’t replicate the embiggening process they did with steve because the scientist that did it got killed, and steve is made into a glorified prettyman mascot to sell war bonds, instead of going to punch nazis, which he would be better at. he is a terrible mascot.
meanwhile, bucky has a shitty goddamn time in the european theatre. it’s terrible. he gets kidnapped by the EVIL SCIENCE NAZIS and put in a freaky camp and experimented on, poor guy.
you said you ship them, right? they’ve barely interacted so far, man. what the fuck.
alright alright i’m getting to it
steve the dancing monkey (in his words) is doing a Morale-Raising tour in europe for the troops and they hate it and he hates it. he discovers that... oh shit... bucky and his regiment (?) have been kidnapped by HYDRA! (the science nazis.)
naturally, he of little training MUST go save bucky, because the people that actually know how to save people know that it would be pointless to try. but steve “dumb shit” rogers will do it his own damn self. don’t @ him either. it’s the 1940s so he doesn’t have a phone.
steve will walk to austria, if he has to!... but he actually just gets a plane ride there, from peggy carter the badass and some other guy who’s not that relevant right now.
he KICKS NAZI ASS, SAVES THE PRISONERS, and MAKES MEANINGFUL EYE CONTACT WITH BUCKY ONCE HE FINDS HIM IN THE EVIL SCIENCE NAZI EXPERIMENTATION ROOM. bucky’s so out of it that he barely even tries to question why his old friend is suddenly hot TALL.
steve and the lads walk back from austria, and he is a Bona Fide War Hero and not just a mascot. he has the stylish grime and everything. on the way, he realizes that the lads are pretty cool, and assembles a Diverse Crack Squad of Guys That Really Wanna Kill Nazis from the cool guys he just met. upon return to wherever they were earlier, steve is made a REAL CAPTAIN now, and his Diverse Crack Squad is at liberty to... go kill nazis.
bucky tags along. he is very handsome and talented at math, so he is a SNIPER and saves steve’s dumb ass (from getting shot by nazis, instead of getting punched in the face) like he used to. the Diverse Crack Squad gears up to take down THE WORST OF THE SCIENCE NAZIS, on a train in the mountains! they can change the course of COMIC BOOK WWII!
you said it was tragic. show me the tragic.
the TRAIN INFILTRATION does not go as planned, and bucky is knocked from the train and falls to his cold, painful, (presumably) death. steve can’t watch.
they catch a REALLY BAD SCIENCE NAZI, but it is a very hollow victory. steve goes and tries to get drunk in a blown-up bar where he hung out with bucky and they were really queer together.
the OTHER really bad science nazi now has a plan to BLOW UP COMIC BOOK NEW YORK! steven will NOT allow this to happen.
he’s also kind of given up on life. he has a flair for the dramatic, and also the ambiguously suicidal.
not that being ambiguously suicidal adds to the Dramatic Romance of this. it doesn’t, and that would be creepy. the point is that steve rogers has a LOT of issues, including the ones that science can’t cure.
this SPECIFIC PLANE is headed towards new york, full of explosives. steve manages to get aboard the plane... and doesn’t even try to escape. he crashes it into the water in the atlantic ocean, saying goodbye to peggy on the radio as it hits. he is also presumed dead. it’s... basically a suicide attempt.
flash forward seventy-some years.
wait, wasn’t he in the avengers?
steve rogers is found inside the frozen plane encased in ice in the ocean. he’s revived (super healing, woop) and... doesn’t say anything, because he’s really not up to expressing feelings.
he has a TERRIBLE time. all of his friends are dead or old and went about their lives without him, and he’s alone in a confusing new world. (but the food is better, vaccines are good, and no polio.) he’s not fantastic at making new friends, because, as shown by him and bucky’s entire relationship, he’s a bit of a sad introvert and just picks one person and... holds on.
blah blah avengers one blah blah, new team and fighting BAD THINGS. but steve is too angsty to make friends. he joins the new security organization that peggy founded, SHIELD, without really inspecting it that well because... he didn’t plan to be alive past flying the plane into the ice, much less in the 21st century. he doesn’t know what he’d do otherwise.
idk that sounds a little slow
he has DEPRESSION. it is a little slow. but it’ll pick up! (not emotionally.) now it’s very anti-establishment action flick. enter CAPTAIN AMERICA (2): THE WINTER SOLDIER.
steve makes a friend. actually, two! sam and natasha are wonderful, and they have some things in common. but steve obtains friendship while realizing that SHIELD is corrupt to the core and actually infiltrated by HYDRA, so he and his new friends have to... burn it to the ground. he “died” (or tried to) to stop HYDRA, and it’s still here and worse then ever. things feel pointless.
to make it worse, he’s fighting this creepily effective impersonal masked assassin on a bridge and oh fuck, oh fuck it’s bucky and didn’t he die years and years ago and his arm is METAL what happened to him, and he’s pretending not to recognize steve.
HYDRA is planning to eliminate sources of resistance for their new world order via shooting them from the air, so steve has to take one specific FLYING DEATHMACHINE down. he does, and brainwashed HYDRA bucky, the winter soldier, is there to stop him.
steve makes an appeal to emotions. “bucky stop you can’t do this”
bucky is confused, but he’s been programmed to do this.
steve tells his coworkers to JUST SHOOT THE DEATHMACHINE DOWN ALREADY, because he’s... given up again. he’s very talented at equating heroism with self-sacrifice/suicide. but he disables the DEATH part of the DEATHMACHINE without it getting shot down.
bucky has been trapped underneath a beam, but steve’s with bucky till the end of the line, even if bucky is brainwashed and lacking memories. steve drops his shield in the water and falls.
it’s another attempt to die. stop that, steve. go to therapy.
bucky doesn’t remember who he is, but he jumps after him. steve is very injured from his fight with bucky, and wouldn’t have survived the fall, but bucky drags him to shore and... leaves.
steve wakes up in the hospital with his new friend sam. they’re going to track bucky down, even if it takes forever.
ISN’T THAT FUCKED UP? isn’t that sad? it’s terrible. now, fics. most of them are after ca:tws, because that’s when the ship got popular. a lot of them center around Finding Bucky and Getting To Know Him Again.
there’s a lot of sappy sad let’s-teach-bucky-how-to-be-a-person-again-and-get-steve-to-be-less-sad but i like the ones that are like sad action movies, or sad queer movies, and less like sad romance movies. my bookmarks are a mess, so here’s the best stuff i could dredge up.
out of the dead land: this one kills me every single time. there’s something terribly cinematic about it. but, as fandom is wont to do, there’s porn near the end. skip that part. ew. it’s an introspective scifi action epic, with just enough identity issues to make you want to cry! READ IT, IT’S IMPORTANT.
this: alternate universe, sans steve “dying.” epistolary. sad, as far as i can remember. (i’d rec the rest of this series but i think it’s best if you read this one first?)
courtroom/media fic. what if the winter soldier got arrested after the movie? (cap fandom does this kind of fake-media thing very well. i just reread it. it’s still good.)
this one isn’t exactly groundbreaking, but it’s a different take on the fandom’s typical post-winter soldier bucky interpretation. quite short, 100% safe for work.
in this one, steve successfully gets drunk, makes some friends, and gains some coping skills. good for dark humour. there’s porn somewhere but i’m sure it’s easily skippable, otherwise i wouldn’t have bookmarked it. not 100% the best thing every but it’s pretty fun.
if you aren’t team s/b all the way then we can’t be friends, but here’s some other marvel stuff i guess
lesbians, ballet, feelings? it’s a rarepair but it’s pretty lovely. au, no background knowledge required. basically a beautiful indie film that’s kind of oscar-bait. you will like this one, i think. there’s probably porn somewhere.
trans black widow. (that chapter only, not sure what the rest is). not very well-written and i have terrible memory but i’m 75% sure it made me cry.
ENJOY! or try to. don’t feel obligated to. but please at least TRY out of the dead land, it is groundbreaking.
2 notes
·
View notes
Photo
New Post has been published on https://manicdak.com/the-cure-and-the-cult-and-demokritoss-atomic-dustbin/
The Cure and the Cult and Demokritos's Atomic Dustbin
The Doctor is Out
Well, it’s time to visit our next person for Mom clues. I will consult the quest list and find out that it is none other than Hippokrates himself. Doctor of Doctors. This guy is chillin’ over in Argolis, which doesn’t sound like a place I’ve visited. Yes, there are still vast quantities of map I haven’t even uncovered yet, as I might have mentioned before. It is right nearby where I already am, so I’m going to take some time now to complete some more locations. I find another tomb! Agamemnon’s tomb. There is nothing at all exciting in here except for snakes, so we’ll just complete the location and see Hippokrates.
Sostratos is his name. Thanks, screencap!
JK! I go to Hippokrates clinic and all I find there is his assistant. Soso…that is not his name. I forget what his name is because I did this the other day, but I know it begins with So and probably ends with ates, but it’s definitely not Soktrates. I will update you when I meet this guy again. Also there is a priestess, Chrysis, who is demanding Hippokrates bow down and proclaim that his mad healing skillz came from the Gods and not science. We basically tell her to get lost. I’m sure she will come back to haunt us later.
In any case, Soso gives me directions and stuff to deliver to Hippokrates and tells me not to mention his bald spot, which I do anyway when I finally get there.
As for Hippokrates, he hasn’t the time for my mommy issues or discussion about his follicular insecurities. Also, why would he even remember Myrrine, he has a zillion patients anyway. I press him for info, but he has tasks for me to do before he can trust and talk. Fiiiiine. First and foremost is some commander stole his notes on brain disease and he needs it to help this dude that is dying on his table right now. He has stiffness of limbs and foaming of the mouth.
Sounds like Tetanus (at first I thought rabies, but we’re dealing and soldiers with possibly rusty swords not animal bites), but still I can’t give Hippokrates the deets, because I am Alexios, not actually gifted in future medical know how even though some future person is peeping through my blood memories. (Remember the premise of Assassin’s Creed? I know, I too forget until I get cut-scened into the future… We haven’t been back to the future in a long time though.)
Maps Are Hard, Okay?
I am off to do Hippokrates bidding, because I am all for actually helpful medicines and getting the info I need too. I am supposed to look for this fort in the north of Argolis, but I have looked all over the damn north and have yet to find a damn thing. Is it “north” in Argolis, but south of the city? WHERE IS IT. I am not turning on easy mode for you, Hippokrates.
**Several tens of minutes later** Please do not laugh, it is actually North of the Ancient Ruins of Perseus not Northern Argolis. This area is clearly labeled on the map, in readable English letters. Excuse while I go hide of shame.
So, I have to sneak into this place without killing anybody, because I made a promise to Hippokrates. An oath, if you will. I don’t sneak so much as I manage to get caught and then hide until the dudes stop looking for me. It is a minor miracle that I was able to get into a hiding space while still inside the fort. I go to meet the doctor there who is definitely amenable to helping me out. Like—why can’t I just send in Ikaros with a note for this dude to meet me outside or something. Because that would be easy.
Notes? What Notes? Side note to the notes: I like this dude’s necklace!
Nothing is easy, especially when Fort Doctor tells me the notes have burned. He did memorize them and will come with me to Hippokrates to help out if I do him a solid and retrieve his bone forceps from some soldiers who keep stealing them for Gods knows what reasons. Whatever they are, they can’t possibly be sanitary. So, I do that, less than stealthily, making this quest so much very longer than it has to be, but I don’t kill anybody. Will this get me secret points to cash in at a later date? Probably not, I don’t think Assassin’s Creed has that much finesse re choices, but you never know when you’re going to need a doctor in the end game and he doesn’t show up because you pissed him off at some point previously. I mean, I already asked about his bald spot.
So, Fort Doctor and Hippokrates meet and this time the bad news is the patient has died because we were too slow. Was this quest on a secret timer? Because I spent an awful lot of time avoiding killing anybody, or does the guy always die? The world may never know. Anyway, Fort Doctor sticks around to transcribe what he remembers of the notes and help out.
Turns out Hippokrates does vividly remember my mom. He turned her away when she came to him for help with her depression and sent her to a sanctuary or something. He vowed to never turn away another person after that. So, now I have my next destination! Are we taking bets on whether or not that priestess I met earlier is at this sanctuary? Let’s find out!
youtube
Near the River of Dreams, as foretold in the ballads of William the Joel
Gods, Snakes, and Secrets
I am to head to the middle of the valley of dreams.
Why are there two targets here? Do I have to do tasks for multiple priests to get my info? Drat.
Well, the first guy is less than helpful. In fact he’s a jerk who won’t talk to me because he’s under orders not to talk to mercenaries about Spartan women and injured babies. How very specific. Obviously he’s got the deets. If I rid his sacred bath of snakes then he will talk to me after all, it turns out. I guess he’s not THAT loyal to whoever ordered him to keep his mouth shut.
First he regales me with stories of how the gods heal the sick, which are wild. The bath is a sacred cleansing and then god of healing, Asklepios will come to the patients. As for the snakes, there is a special snake house that they escaped from where people with mind sickness go. The snakes lick them with their tongues and it is like a kiss from the gods. The snakes have escaped their house.
I can’t kill the snakes either, because the priests need their kisses. I have to chill them with cold water so they go back to their own warm snake houses. That doesn’t sound right, but there are no Snake Discovery videos about how to safely rid an ancient Greek bathhouse of sacred God kissing snakes, so what do I know?
I find the pipe and wonder why this dude couldn’t have turned on the cold water his damn self. This guy is the worst, he doesn’t even tell me anything and walks around laughing like it’s all a big joke. I just get another guy to talk to.
A Tablet of Truth
The next priest who is carving records into stone is Timoxenos. He is very helpful and talkative despite orders. Turns out Chrysis is the priestess here and it was she who has put the fear of gods into everybody and told them not to talk to me, also, yes, she is the lady who was giving Hippokrates’s assistant an earful at the beginning of this chapter. What is her deal? Because I didn’t side with her when she was harassing Soso? Also, whoever bet that she would be here, you win!
Stone Tales
Anyway, Tim over here, leads me to my mom’s stone. She came here wounded with a child and then went on her way. The child did not survive. I’m going to meet Tim later though, because we get caught and I have to pretend like I’m asking for directions.
Later, at the Olive tree, we get caught again. I have to defeat Chrysis’s thugs and Tim is nowhere to be found afterward. I hope he ran away! On to the next priest who is probably not going to help me, I guess.
He is battling some contagion which cannot be helped with the regular sacrifices or snake kisses. I offer to help him, because there are people suffering, for goodness sake. He thinks I want money and whatever nonsense Chrysis has been spewing, but if I bring him an alive white bull—maybe he’ll talk. I’m hoping he’s more of a Tim, less of a bathhouse dude whose name I don’t remember because eff that guy!
Let’s go safely trap a bull! *gets stun arrows ready*
I don’t need them, as it turns out, because bandits already killed the bull. Dammit. Uggghh, now the bull heart I bring back to the priest can only help one person and I have to choose. The farmer whose bull it was (he provides food to the area), a wealthy woman (with 2 kids), or the child (who wants to sacrifice herself for the others). Noooo. Well, I am going to choose the selfless child,
and then like—refer everybody else to Hippokrates, because he has actual medicines probably? Chrysis can go jump off a bridge. (PS. I can’t actually do that.)
The deed is done, the adults curse my name and vow revenge. And the priest refers me to the oldest man here for more info. I also learn that this old guy he speaks of cut out his own tongue and also I level up! Nice.
So, the guesthouse where oldie lives is guarded as hell, and I have to bully my way in there, but tbh I’ve had just about enough of Chrysis, so her thugs can be gone. When I finally meet the old man, he is hooking up with a slave. She speaks for him about how the baby was past saving, but eventually it comes out that Chrysis took the infant. (and gave her to the cult, obvies. Since Kassandra is all cult-brainwashed now and certainly alive.) Poor Myrrine thought both her babies were dead, but they were both not. Where the heck is she now?
It’s a Chrysis!
I still don’t know yet. I go seek Chrysis out at a baby saving altar and she tells me all her evil plans over this random screaming infant.
Ughhh, turns out this woman kidnapped my sister and abused her to “teach her how to be strong.” She wants more children from Myrrine, who must still be in hiding and tbh, I am double over her. Especially now that I know she’s hassling me, not because I sided with Soso, but because she’s a G-D Cultist.
She basically calls me a hypocrite because I’m an assassin myself with a body count too, and then she throws on a Molotov cocktail or some such at the baby. Okay, I may be an assassin, but at least I wouldn’t ever try to torch a baby. This isn’t the Sims. Geez. I save the baby from the fire of course and the kid’s mom thinks it’s all the God’s plan even if the baby had burned. Luckily God sent me and Chrysis can do no wrong. Gee, you’re welcome lady.
Well, the distraction worked. Chrysis has escaped, and I have to find her again. Alas, her quest-line is ended, so I guess I’m not meant to find her right away.
I need a break from all those revelations, so I’m going to do a character quest now. It is called “The Dunce conundrum” That sounds fun. (Probably not with my luck.) I have to go talk to a dude called Demokritos “The Laughing Philosopher” to unlock a mystery with some theorems. Cooool, sounds like my worst geometric nightmare, but off we go!
I run across a quest on the way to meet Demokritos. It is a woman wailing about suspicious bandits in a supposedly safe forest kidnapping her husband and her horse. I offer to help and as it turns out, it is a trap set by Chrysis, because she knew I would help.
Uhh…congrats, lady? On your plan to lure me out when I was already looking for you. Seriously, you didn’t have to kill a dude to face me, you could have just not run away the first time!
WTF. She is trying to get me to join her! ‘Yo, Alexios, sorry I broke your mother and kidnapped and abused your sister, but you should come work for me now!’ Forget that, I’m going to avenge my sister.
She calls some plain old footsoldiers to fight me and well—I may have hit her with a hasty and wildly aimed arrow or she might have been stabbed by her lackeys. Honestly, I cannot tell. Either way, I easily defeat the soldiers and return to Chrysis so I can vow to reunite my family before I put an end to her evil child abusing ways for good. I wonder if I have enough shards to upgrade my spear yet.
Theorems, Theorems, Everywhere, and also a Cyclops
Update: I do!
Also, is it just me or are there new things on spear island? There is a golden Q here now. Did I just miss a legendary creature all the times we came here? Let’s go check it out.
OK, it’s a literal ass cyclops. (Not a one eyed human gangster) Time to run the fuck away because this thing is ten levels above me still.
A Thoughtful Demokritos
Should I visit the Laughing Philosopher? Sounds good to me! Bye, bye, Clops.
I fast travel to Demokritos and he tells me the tales of three theorems that will lead to great treasure, Zeno’s Paradox, the Pythagorean Theorem—no need to search for that one my dude it’s A² + B² = C². You’re welcome, and thank you, math class. The third one is the Golden Ratio. He says he will pay me for my help.
Of course I will find them, but I want the treasure man. Unless the treasure is more math, then you can have it. Will these three theorem’s combine together to create some sort of mega-theorem, a STEMzord if you will?
Judging by the name of the quest, I feel I’m going to come out of this looking foolish, but let’s find out!
The Zeno’s paradox is first, so let’s head on over there.
On my way there, I stumble across a bear den. “Salty” bear to be exact. He is big and white and I forgot I had my knockout arrows out for that bull, because now Salty is not defeated, he is my friend. Yay! I don’t keep him for long, because taming the bear completes the location as I found out with Lions McGee. So, I just let him go right where I found him and go on about my business. It takes me a while to find this paradox because it is in the very corner of the area I’m looking in.
There are a lot of incomplete locations here still, but I am off to find Pythagoris’s theorem for now. It is, of course, in the middle of a triangle of islands. I wander all around the area getting attacked by pirates, including one boat that gave me an achievement for defeating! I don’t know what that achievement was, but go me! Pythagoras’s theorem is in an underwater temple along with a cultist clue!
Precious and Salty
Next, the Golden ratio is super easily acquired in a sculptor’s studio. OF course. I learned about that one in art class I now realize. Ah, well, since I already have all the knowledge it’s time to head back to finish the quest. (Except for Zeno? Do I know that one? Maybe Demokritos will tell me when I show him all my scrolls.)
Okay, I’m going cheat and look this up because Demo here is asking me trivia questions about these concepts that I get to multiple choice answer and I’m assuming he’s assuming I already read it, so I might as well already read it.
I don’t know. Infinite divisibility sounds like the best of my options, but I read about Achilles and the Tortoise and am very confused. Why are we giving this reptile a head start anyway? Well, divisibility was the right answer to impress Demokritos, but I still don’t get it.
As for the Pythagorean theorem, according to Demokritos this is the greatest breakthrough of all time. Yeah! Triangles!
And the Golden ratio is in everything and everybody or nothing at all, making things mathematically right and beautiful in the world.
As it turns out Demokritos really is creating his own STEMzord mega-theory. Let’s see what it is. He postulates that as we break down things into infinitely divisible parts then there is more space between them. Huh, is he talking about like…atoms? quantum physics? Is he going to invent time travel or a shrink ray or be the father of the memory machine? (At this point, I wiki good old Demo who is a person that did indeed exist like many characters in this game. We are talking atoms! Yeah!)
He hopes to unite the world with this theory anyway. TBH this kind of science seems like it might do the opposite at this point in time, or maybe not and I’ve just been dealing with too many fanatically religious cultists lately. (Nope, I look this up too and nobody takes his atomic hypothesis seriously until the 19th damn century. I’m learning a lot on this quest.)
Ahah! He does have an ulterior motive though. He’s creating his STEMzord mega-theory to impress a girl. Of course he is. I am not one for wasting time, so I convince him to go see her now. Unfortunately there is a crapload of bandits at her house. No! Also, they are a good seven levels above me. Err—can I put this quest on hold after I convinced Demokritos to come here? I didn’t think I was going to need a save point before I accepted the next part of his nerd-quest! Will he just wait for me to grind? Let’s find out on the next installment of !Dakplays Assassin’s Creed!
0 notes
Note
So I used to read a whole bunch, but then I took a small break so that I could have an actual social life. Now I'm trying to get back into it but I've tried to... I just can't get into it. Do you have any suggestions of what I could do to get back into wanting to read more?
bI relate to this SO. MUCH. It’s always hard to find a good reading/life balance, since reading can often be a very isolating activity. It’s also really difficult around this time of year for younger readers, too, since a lot of us are getting back into the swing of it with school and such and find that we have much less time to be reading what we want. So without further ado…
How I cure “reader’s block”/being in a book rut!!!
1) First of all, there’s literally no shame in reading something because it’s short and you know you can get through it, or reading something you might consider a “beach read.” If it’s less daunting for you to pick up a 70-page romance novella than Tolstoy that is perfectly!!! okay!!! What matters is that you’re still reading and it’s making you happy, not that you have gained all the answers to the universe by reading a dry and endless classic.
2) Another good option is to reread something you know you really love/want to revisit. I find it’s typically easier to read something for the second or third time and if it’s been a while, then you’ll still be surprised by little things here and there and get the warm nostalgia fuzzies. For me, one of my old favorites to revisit is Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell. I always read it at the beginning of the summer when I’m switching from all academic reading to personal reading (f i n a l l y) because I’m familiar enough with the story that it goes pretty quickly, but I still really love it.
3) In a similar vein, I find it really fun when I don’t want to sit down and read seriously to go back to some of my old favorites from childhood! For example, I loved the Deltora books by Emily Rodda when I was a kid and had some fun the other day going back through some of them and reminiscing. It has the potential to remind you of your love for stories and also in my case, it reminded my why I fell in love with fantasy at a young age and why I’m still so passionate about it! Reading children’s/middle grade/YA books is always acceptable and so much fun at any age.
4) This Barnes and Noble Reader article also suggests reading about books if you can’t actually read a book. As they explain it, find book blogs (like those on tumblr!) that speak to your interests and get you excited about picking up books. Other people’s enthusiasm goes a long way in encouraging you to also pick up a book to read!
5) If you can, find other avid readers and friends who you feel comfortable sitting in silence with! One of my favorite memories ever is sitting on my friend’s back porch and trading the books of the KARE First Love manga series back and forth. We played peaceful music in the background and so we were spending time as friends AND getting reading done. This lead us to discuss our favorite scenes and how we felt about certain translations (literally just because we like how to guy asked the main girl out in the online scantalation better than the printed book rip). But we ended up really getting into this series that in all honesty is kind of silly (despite the soft spot I have in my heart for it) and we joke about it all the time. Reading and socializing in one!
6) And speaking of manga…it’s always a great bridge for getting back into reading when it’s been a while, as are graphic novels! If you haven’t ever tried manga or graphic novels and don’t think it’s your rap at least give them a chance! I thought I hated them until I read Fullmetal Alchemist and fell in l o v e! You’re getting a story and doing some reading, but the pictures really help to ease you in so that you’re not necessarily devoting the same attention that you would be with a novel that’s just pages of text. As such, each volume is pretty quick depending on how long you linger on the drawings. If you already do love manga/graphic novels, then try picking up a new series you’ve been interesting in or rereading a series you already know you like!
Here are some graphic novel recommendations!
Nimona by Noelle Stevenson (a story that does a fun take on the idea of the “bad guy” - it actually gave me way more feels than expected, and I loved the art style)
The new Ms. Marvel series written by G. Willow Wilson and illustrated by Adrian Alphona (so do not confuse this with the old Ms. Marvel, this one is better in my opinion because our hero is your average teenage Muslim girl living in Jersey City and it’s refreshing, amazing, adds diversity to the typically white/male dominated world of superheroes, and I am unabashedly in love with one of the main characters, Bruno)
Umbrella Academy written by Gerard Way and illustrated by Gabriel Ba (this does another more twisted/dark take on the idea of the superhero story, if that’s something more up your alley. It’s the first book of a series I’ve really been loving lately, plus I trust Gerard Way’s taste in comics unequivocally and he wrote it so that’s a yes in my book!)
American Born Chinese by Gene Luen Yang (the intertwining stories of an American-Chinese boy trying to figure out his place in the world and the Monkey King of Chinese fable)
I did not include a special section for manga recommendations because most of what I read is probably not the sort of stuff to dive into after having reader’s block. Overall, the realm of shoujo might be a good place to look (things like Skip Beat!, Blue Spring Ride, Fruits Basket, and Kimi ni Todoke. Ouran High School Host Club and Dengeki Daisy were ones I really enjoyed too.)I also recently read Orange which is a fairly short series and easy to read - I loved it but major depression/suicide/mental illness tws there.In terms of shonen, Hunter x Hunter would be a good one because not only is it amazing, but it’s broken up into shorter yet very distinct story arcs which I feel would be easier if you’re trying to get back into reading. If someone has some more recs tho, please add!
7) Another variation of manga/graphic novels is online webtoons, which are basically digitized comics. I have recently discovered them and think they’re the best. things. ever. If you’re like me and you have a horrible habit of lying in bed scrolling absently through your phone before going to bed and after waking up, this might be good for you. I have slowly been replacing my mindless Facebook scrolling with scrolling through webtoons, which has been so amazing for my mental health! My favorite app is literally just called Webtoon or maybe Line Webtoon (the icon in the app store is a green speech bubble that says “Webtoon”).
For most webtoons, chapters are generally pretty short so it doesn’t take a lot of focus but once again, you’re still reading, and you’re still getting a good story, all while laying fetal position like you might while scrolling through Facebook or texting people before bed. Not to mention you’re supporting amazingly talented artists/individuals who are oftentimes not published and doing this for fun or with the hopes of eventually being published, so you can say you followed them from the start! Also since they update only a few times a week, it gives you something to look forward to on random days.
Here are my favorite story-oriented webtoons currently:
Assassin Roommate by Monica Gallagher. Super cute and quirky romance with a great female lead, also really great in terms of body diversity, and LITERALLY THE ONLY REASON I LOOK FORWARD TO TUESDAYS, THE DREADFUL DAY AFTER MONDAY
My Dear Cold-Blooded King by limelight. Just started this but it seems pretty cool??? The author has paired up with a musician so all the chapters have music which is lit af if I do say so myself
Silk and Briar by paragoing-paragon. I think this is on hiatus but it’s shaping up to be a brilliantly-constructed fantasy story with some crazy twists and turns
instantmiso’s stuff is also really popular (Where Tangents Meet and Siren’s Lament). It’s not as much up my alley as it is pretty fluffy romance and I’m not crazy about the writing, but she is an incredibly talented artist and has great music with her chapters. Her stuff is super good for an easy read without a ton of brain power/commitment, but I say that with immense respect for her talent and abilities!
Cheese in the Trap by soonkki. This was also made into a K-Drama so I read the series and threw a little watch-party with some of my friends from my Korean class! Super good series and another great way to enjoy reading AND be social!
Here are the webtoons that are more “Sunday newspaper funnies” style, where each chapter is a mini story:
Bluechair by Shen (this is WILDLY popular and I totally see why!!! These are hilarious and have cheered me up on many a rough night!!!)
Sapphie: The One-Eyed Cat by joho (feel-good, cute comic about cats that’s also pretty funny. I shamelessly read like a hundred chapters in one sitting.)
If none of this is appealing to you, there is always the audio option! If the actual act of your eyes scanning the page is difficult because you can’t focus on anything, there are a lot of options in this realm!
8) Local libraries usually have an audiobook section that is deeply neglected, but holds some secret treasures! Whenever I go on roadtrips, I always pick up two or three before I head out. They’re also perfect for when you do mindless tasks like sorting/folding laundry, walking a dog if you have one, waiting in long lines, or on your commute to and from school or work or any other similar activities.
What’s cool is you can search for audiobooks based both on books you actually want to read, and whoever is narrating it. I know Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe by Benjamin Alire Saenz had a super popular audiobook because Lin Manuel Miranda narrated it. If you want to pay, Audible is one of the most popular paid platforms for audiobooks. I haven’t personally used it, but it seems to be quite successful. One way or another, audiobooks are a good way to get back into reading without having to budget extra time to sit down with a book.
9) Podcasts can also help if you haven’t already explored those and are open to! Not all podcasts are TED talks, or political debates, or generally academic, or whatever they are stereotyped as. There are a ton that feel just like audiobooks, or at the very least like a play without any visuals. There’s a script and there’s a story and I know it’s helped me ease back into a mindset that preps me for reading because much like audiobooks you can listen to them all the time (I do so while cooking dinner and walking to classes) and it helps your mind switch from reality to the world of a story with relative ease if that makes sense. I’m pretty new to podcasts myself so don’t have a ton to recommend, but here’s what I’ve been enjoying….
Podcasts to look into:
Anything written by Mac Rogers. That includes The Message, Afterlife, and Steal the Stars. Personally, I like Steal the Stars and The Message more that Afterlife. They’re all sci-fi stories that are generally told from one perspective but you get to know amazing characters and I was not expecting the twists and turns. And Steal the Stars is still coming out so jump on the bandwagon now lol
The Adventure Zone from Justin, Travis and Griffin McElroy at My Brother, My Brother and Me (another podcast which I have not listened to). The Adventure Zone is actually them playing Dungeons and Dragons, but they’re funny as all get out (the last place I lived had a communal kitchen for dozens of people and I was always laughing like and idiot while listening to this and making dinner and I’m pretty sure everyone thought I was nuts). Eventually the Dungeon Master gets super into the story telling and they script some of it with cool music. It’s really amazing and has a nice balance between story/characters but also the element of “real people” as they’re a bunch of brothers and they’re dad all just having fun. It’s a good bridge to getting back into reading.
Welcome to Nightvale is always a classic. It’s a bit trippy for me but tons of people enjoy it. The same team also produced a podcast called Alice Isn’t Dead. I honestly know nothing about it but one of my friends always raves about it, so it has his vote!
10) And okay so here’s my last suggestion. It might feel like a bit of a cop-out because I guess it kind of is, but it often works for me. So here it is. Sometimes it just helps to sit down and remember why you like to read in the first place. The fact that you’re actively trying to get back into it isn’t meaningless. It’s a very willful decision. So what is driving you? Maybe it’s because…
reading is an escape or a way for you to cope with difficult things in your life. This can be anything from mental illness, to school/work stress, to relationship dissatisfaction, difficult family or economic situations. Maybe you just are bored of our planet earth. Sometimes you might just need to be transported into another world for whatever reason and that is totally okay.
or reading inspires you to live your best life. Maybe there’s some character in a book you love that you look up to and aspire to be. Remember that passion you had when you were first getting to know that character, and that sense of being understood or finding a role model. Maybe you want to go on an adventure as wild as that character went on and that’s your idea of living your best life. Whatever the reason is, this sort of inspiration is a powerful emotion that books make us feel and sometimes that’s also a good reason to reread a book that’s inspired you.
and I don’t know, maybe you’re a writer yourself and you draw inspiration from reading in that sense. The more you read, the more you learn about what sort of writing you like and don’t like, and you grow stronger in your craft. Good readers help make good writers (but also don’t take that to mean that if you happen to be a writer and you’ve been in a book rut for a long time that you own skills are waning. we all get in book ruts and that’s okay. maybe it’s time to seek out a new source of inspiration in a different genre or new writer)
or perhaps you simply love stories. Maybe you breathe stories like other people breathe air and you can’t imagine that side of you not existing. If you’re one of these people, that makes reader’s block twice as hard. But that doesn’t mean that if you’re not turning pages that you’re not absorbing stories. Take it slowly and ease back into it with things I already mentioned like podcasts and webtoons.
One way or another, you’ll find your way back. Maybe this post will spark something. Maybe it won’t, and it will take another few months for you to really feel gungho about reading again. That’s all okay. Take your time. Enjoy being with friends and other activities. Do what’s healthiest and what works best for you. And eventually you’ll get back to reading a ton. However it happens, I wish you the best of luck!
#ask#asks#amazingdanseptiplier#bookworm#book worm#reading#books#booklr#recommendations#book recs#readers block#advice#literature#podcasts#manga#graphic novels#audio books#my post#mine
9 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
maledom---j
제이
onyxallure-blog1
Onyx Allure
mafiosaprintesa
Comics stock
laskanopijogja
bengkellaskanopii
taptapw
无标题