If Fey steal names… could I get a fry to steal my DEADNAME???
I wonder. Because if that’s the case, fey could make a killing of extorting trans people! Why have they not thought of this yet? I just want to be able to rid myself of the accursed title my parents gave me. Please god I’m suffering
I can see us lost in a memory, August slipped away cuz you were never mine. 🍂 #SparksNTheCity #sashasloan #summerconcerts ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ #augusttaylorswift #folklore #thewiltern #sadgirl #sadboy #sadboihours #allblack #lookdodia #menwithstreetstyle #streetfashion #fashionblogger #styleblogger #blackfashionblogger #styleinspiration #styleinfluencer #fashioninspo #sadmusic #hoobastank #summervibes #onlyinla #californialiving #lalife (at The Wiltern) https://www.instagram.com/p/Ch5DcM-pwWB/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=
Last band show in the city EVER (for now) is next Friday May 27th @heavencanwaitnyc !! @alexandra_gabrielle9 @derkewalt and I are gonna be trying some new things so it’s gonna be a blast!! Don’t forget to pluck your ticket from my bio 👿 • • • this pic by @christnokeefe <3 • • • #localmusic #livemusic #indiemusic #indieartist #livemusicnyc #queerartist #queersinger #sadboihours #indierock (at Manhattan, New York) https://www.instagram.com/p/Cdt2f5-Ola4/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=
I’m in a weird head space lately, I’m having a hard time being happy or finding happiness in things that I enjoy, I’m stressed, I resist the urge to put a gun in my mouth every day, little things irritate me, I get really angry easily.
Most days I just want to fucking scream until I destroy my vocal cords.
I’m living in an environment where I can’t feel anything the way I want to, I’m not allowed to be frustrated or angry, so I stuff those feelings down and let it manifest in other destructive ways, like planning my own suicide and lashing out at the people I care about. I’ve so often fantasized about killing myself, but I know I wouldn’t go through with it yet. I’d have to be lower than low. I’ve been there before and I don’t ever want to return.
But the more and more my life turns sour, the deeper l go, and I’m starting to get so tired of waking up every day, tired of living this endless cycle of being some fucking mediocre dude from the middle of nowhere.
I need a change, I need love, I need help, I need someone to legitimately care, just one time.
I don’t know. I’m just rambling at this point.
But I’m tired and almost ready to give up, I just hope I can fix myself before then.