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goldsbitch · 1 month

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Our wedding

Y/N and Lando probably went a little too overboard when planning their wedding. She finally looses it when his friend suggests a product placement bucket hat.

A dream wedding.

Distant palazzo, with acres of private lands to roam around at night. Lavish dress, designed to fit perfectly and re-done three times. Coordinators, who made sure everyone who needed to be invited actually was. And also took care about almost anything one can imagine.

A perfect wedding, that's what they both wanted. Go big or go home. Combining romance, with generously giving everyone they loved, or deemed important, the time of their life. To say that this event was supposed to be extra would be an understatement.

Lando said yes to all of Y/N's wished regarding flower arrangements, menu items and rooming lists. She said yes to all of this ideas about the music, sound systems set up in each part of the venue (because heaven would turn upside down if there had been one quiet spot with no music, according to Lando) and drinks choices. They could not agree on the photographer - so Lando just booked his, and hers option as well. Saving money was not on the table. He knew that the amount of good PR and brand deals the Quadrant team managed to get together was going to pay out in the long run. Everyone loves a wedding.

That's where the first issues started - the amount of people invited grew into higher hundreds. She voiced her point few times, but Lando quickly shut those off with a promise to book a private charter for all friends and family who were coming from her homeland. She caved in and agreed to just few more CEO's she'd never met, as long as they did not share their table.

It was the final two months before the wedding and things could not be more hectic. They had to plan the wedding around Lando's race schedule, so summer break between races it was. Y/N had to juggle her job with all of this planning, so she attended less races than she usually would. Most of the calls she shared with Lando were wedding related and it seemed like his best friend Max took it upon himself to speak on behalf of Lando - so sometimes it felt like she was marrying Max rather than her fiancé. After a total break down she had few days ago, which resulted in her crying on the phone to Lando at 4 am his local time, they agreed she absolutely had to come over to the next race so that they could find some down time.

Having to endure a tiring overnight flight, she finally stepped into the hotel where Lando was staying at. Exhausted, jet-lagged and generally in a bad mood were the main ingredients in the perfect cocktail of "you should just avoid me" Y/N. She finally opened the door to his room and let out a groan. Traveling to see him used to be her favorite thing. A bombastic cherry on top was that she immediately recognized Max's voice coming from the living room. Was this guy staying in the same room as them now?

"Y/N, is that you?" she heard, desperately hoping he hadn't heard her enter in. She felt like a bitch for wishing that, but he was the last person she wanted to see at that point. Her hopes of jumping in the bed and cuddling Lando the first thing coming here dissolved like cotton candy, leaving tooth aches behind.

"Yes, Max, it's me," she said, not even bothering adjusting her tone to something more socially appropriate.

"Great, just on time. Can you come in here? We have some decisions that are becoming pressing matters," he said dryly and added his own frustrated comment quietly "...since someone does not feel like answering emails." She heard that, bit her lip and swallowed all her comments, otherwise she would explode.

"What's up?" she asked, entering the living space. There were dozens of baseball caps and buckets hats laid down on the coffee table with Max and some random young guy towering over them.

"We need you to pick out one of these which you'll be wearing after the reception. I have a great brand deal on the table which I need to close today. So, go ahead - pick one." She could not believe the words coming out of Max's mouth. Was he for real?

"May I ask when did I agree to wearing a baseball cap with my dress right after my wedding?"

Max glanced at her and then rolled his eyes. "Can you just pick one? Lando is on board with this, he'll be wearing this green one," he pointed to objectively very nice stylish item of clothing - but still, it was a bucket hat. Rage levels shot up in Y/N blood steam.

"Max, I'm suppose to be wearing my wedding dress until the evening, that's also in some deal you guys made," she proclaimed, hoping this would finally make him get some sense. "The dress is very classical, I don't think this would fit the vibe."

"Oh, come, we agreed to sticking to the Quadrant Athletes color palette and all of these check that. We want to break the classical vibe up with this."

"I'm sorry, who exactly is we in this scenario? And who the fuck are you?!" she pointed at the guy standing next to Max.

"I'm...I'm the product placement controller," he said in a shy voice.

Her eyes just went wide at that point.

"Y/N, no need to freak out again, you need to create a viral moment to make the brand grow," Max said, as if he was talking about a new merch launch.

And that was the final straw. "I'm getting sick of you guys making my wedding into a Quadrant PR stunt. You need to realize this is my wedding, not yours! The whole event is already dripping with brand deals and promotions, is there nothing out of line to you? Will my mom also have to wear one of these hats? Will force the officiant to wear sneakers? Where will you stop?"

Max stared at her, his own cup finally also full. But unlike her, he spoke calmly - again, giving strong business vibes. "Oh, I'm sorry - I'm sorry I am pulling heaven and Earth to make sure your wedding does not ruin your future husband! I apologize that I seem to be more stressed about this wedding than you are. Sorry for caring and trying to uphold some standard."

"Max, this is all too much! I feel like I'm suffocating," she tried to reason with him once more.

He just had enough at that point. So many little moments of mutual disagreement finally grew on him.

"Yeah, well maybe you're just not suited for this world."

Before she could even take a breath to respond, a familiar voice cut them both off.

"Guys, that's enough I'd say," Lando said as he slowly stepped out the same corridor Y/N had entered moments ago. Both Max and Y/N turned around, knowing they'd have spoken way differently had they known he was there as well.

Max gulped, knowing he stepped over a line and immediately started to apologize. "Mate, I'm sorry, we just sort of lost it. I'm sorry."

Lando glanced at him, his face suddenly hard to read for both his friend and his fiancée. He quickly flashed Y/N a look, seeing the obvious distress finally on his own, in a way the camera on a phone just does not capture. It pained him to see them two fighting, but it pained him more to see her on the verge of crying.

She couldn't find words to apologize to Max. In fact she could barely even see him, as Lando took all of her attention.

"Can you guys leave us for now? I think we need to talk alone," Lando said in a tone so serious that Max hardly remembered last time he'd heard it.

"Yeah, mate. Of course," he said shyly, gesturing to his companion to quickly exit with him.

Once the door finally clicked, Y/N felt like she could get out of her frozen state.

"My god. Lando, I knew it would be a challenge these few months, but I did not expect to grow so far away from you," she said, as the words flew out of her mouth without her being able to control it.

He was more careful with his words, but brave nevertheless. "It's true. I don't think we've even been so distant."

Him acknowledging it just made it real and hurt more.

"Right. At least we have that in common."

There was an awkward silence, something these two hadn't experienced in months.

"Why is Max involved so much?" she asked, hoping that she would not hear anything that would make her biggest fear come true - Lando's lack of desire to marry her.

He took a moment to get his point in the right order. "He's my best friend. This is our wedding. I can't stop focusing on racing, but I want it to be perfect. I'd say not giving him any credit sometimes."

Of course, he was defending him. She wondered if he defended her in front of Max sometimes.

All card on the table. She gulped before uttering the next sentence. "I'm scared that I don't want to go to my own wedding anymore. I feel like an unwanted guest."

They shared a look full of hidden pain. It was impossible to tell, but Lando was scared as never before. "What are you saying...Do you want to call it of??"

She looked back at him, praying that he would understand. "God no, that's the last thing I want to do," she sighed and put her head in her hands. How did it got to a place where he could even assume that? "Marrying you, the love of my life, is my dream. In fact, I'd just like to jump to the moment where I can finally say yes to you."

The air still felt really heavy. "Then let's do just that."

"What do you mean?"

Lando took few steps closer to her, missing her close proximity for the past few weeks. He desperately needed to fix them. "Let's book a wedding for next week in Monaco, just you me and any other people required by the law."

The idea of that seemed silly at first. But the more she thought about it, the more she craved that idea. "So, you want to call the actual wedding off?"

Lando chuckled at the image of them cancelling that at last minute and all the hustle that would bring. "No, silly, not unless you really want to. But who says we can't have a fake ceremony there, celebrate with everyone, while already being married at that point? We don't need to tell anyone, keep the magic for them. We can have two weddings."

It was her time to laugh now. "So because we find organizing one wedding hard, we're going to be doing two now?"

"We are anything but conventional. And if this is news for you then, well...That would mean I'm marrying the queen of delulu. Twice."

The weight of the past weeks was lifted.

"Does this mean I can say "No." at the big wedding?" she teased him, closing the distance between them and holding his hand.

"Not if I'll say "No." first," he winked and quickly gave her a kiss on the cheek.

"I'm not wearing a bucket hat. Just stating that now."

"Oh come, at least one of our weddings," he said as he ruffled her hair. "Wow, I think you need a post airport shower, my love."

"Do not try and change the topic - no bucket hats!" she mumbles as she tried to fix her hair.

"Fine, I'll just get you drunk. You'll wear a bucket hat at one of our weddings one way or another."

It felt so good to just banter with him, like they always did before they got caught up in all the stress. A shot of guilt went through her system, as she flashed back at the whole process so far.

"I should probably apologize to Max," she uttered, avoiding his eye contact once again.

He finally hugged her. "Yeah probably. But...let him rot in his feelings for a moment. I hate when someone makes you upset. Apart from me, of course."

"What makes me upset right now is the alarming amount clothes you're wearing."

"That's my girl!"

They got legally married the following weekend, Lando bribing anyone he could in order for them to skip few spots that were unavailable. The first wedding was secret and full of inappropriate, but honest kisses. The second one was fake, but they slayed it together, as newly married couple. Without the stress of actually getting married, they really enjoyed their wedding. The little secret stayed with them - and Max of course, because he just had to get involved with everything.

#lando norris #lando norris x reader #lando norris x you #lando norris fanfic #ln4 imagine #formula 1 #formula one x reader #f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #fluff #lando norris fluff #formula 1 fluff #formula 1 fanfic #ln4 x reader #ln4 x y/n #lando norris x y/n #formula 1 one shot #f1 one shot

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flemingsfreckles · 2 months

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Newlyweds

Jessie Fleming x Reader

Preview: You and Jessie finally get married, when you get home, your original plans get derailed by your sleepy wife

Warnings: suggestive, mentions of sex (fingering), getting walked in on, no detailed smut, non sexual nudity, showering together,

WC: 1.6k

A/N: this ended up soft and fluffy, I thought about taking it the smut route but I didn’t, sorry I know yall love some smut, I also finished writing this just now and I’m just gonna post it, it’ll edit it if I find errors but it’s very possible they’re in there.

Jessie was practically cackling as she ran down the hallway of your home toward your bedroom with you cradled in her arms.

“If you fall you’re going to get us both hurt Jessie.” You tried to protest when she went to pick you up outside the front door.

“It’ll be fine! Plus it’s a tradition thing.”

“I think the tradition is the groom carries the bride through the door, last time I checked we’re both the bride.”

“Shhh just let me do it.” You had, reluctantly let her pick you up, bridal style, walking you through the door of your house. It only took 3 steps for Jessie to in fact trip over the rug that sat at the entrance.

Thankfully neither of you were hurt, she had managed to catch both herself and you before either of you hit the floor.

“Jessie!”

That’s what set her off laughing. And she couldn’t stop, she was hysterically laughing as she kept moving, using your body to push open the bedroom door. By the time she placed you on the bed you were laughing too. You couldn’t help it, your wife’s laugh was contagious.

“I cannot believe you almost fell.” You shake your head looking up at where she stood next to the bed. Going limp she flops down onto the bed next to you. She’s laying on her stomach, looking at you as you lay on your back, turned to the side to look at your wife.

“Hi wifey.” She whispers to you, the biggest toothy grin across her face.

“Hi wife.” You lean in and kiss her gently.

You both lay, just staring at each other, soaking in the fact that just a few hours ago you had officially gotten married.

The two of you had joked for so long that you practically were married, being together since you were 17 and 18, you had stayed together falling in love with each other more and more as the time went on. Now being 25 and 26 you finally had done it, in front of all your friends and family, you were married.

As you stare at her you notice her eyes starting to flutter closed, then she’d open them with a couple hard blinks, before they’d start to droop again. The sight is adorable, Jessie’s sleepy face gently placed on the bed.

“Let’s go to sleep Jess”

“No, we’re supposed to, ya know, consummate the marriage.” She cracks her eyes enough to look at you and wiggles her eyebrows.

“Babe, I think that tradition is more for people who didn’t sleep together before marriage, we’ve been having sex for like 8 years.”

“But still, we’ve never had sex as wives.”

“What do you call the fingering in the reception bathroom then?” You counter.

You weren’t too proud of it, but something about seeing Jessie in her tuxedo declaring how much she loved you in front of everyone you both cared about, turned you on. You couldn’t help yourself but to whisper some filthy words into Jessie’s ear as both of you sat having dinner. The two of you had snuck off to a bathroom during your reception to have a moment to yourselves, one thing turned into another and before you knew it Jessie had you sitting on the sink, her fingers under your dress and inside of you.

Jessie’s face turned red at the memory.

“That doesn’t count as consummation, no one finished.” She argues with you.

“That’s not my fault, you can thank your sister for that.”

Jessie’s little, but thankfully adult, sister had come looking for both of you. The photographer needed you both for photos with your brand new wedding bands. You thought you had locked the door when you walked in, turns out Jessie had already made an attempt to lock it, meaning you unlocked it. She had looked everywhere, before she opened the bathroom door, seeing her older sister between your thighs, your dress hiked up around your waist and Jessie’s hand between your legs.

“Oh, you two are disgusting.” She clasped her hand over her eyes. “Wash your hands and both of you get out here, the photographer needs you!” Jessie had been mortified, being caught by her sister of all people, she would’ve preferred a teammate. You had laughed it off and dragged your red faced wife out of the bathroom.

The party continued on for a few hours after and while you were still very turned on by your wife, the exhaustion of the day started to sink in not exactly leaving either of you in the mood for what you knew would be multiple rounds of sex.

You watched as Jessie’s eyes continued to flutter shut each time they shut they stay closed for longer and longer until you’re pretty convinced she wasn’t going to open them again.

“Hey,” you gently nudge her shoulder and her eyes crack open. “Let’s go shower and get changed.”

“But I’m so comfortable here.”

“Come on babe, we can have our first shower together as wives.” Saying the word wife and it not being a joke anymore made you smile.

“So cozy in the bed.” She mumbled as her eyes closed again.

“Alright, hang on.” You stand up, moving over to the side of the bed closest to her, you scoop your arms under her shoulders and the other under her knees. She doesn’t protest as you lift her and carry her into the bathroom.

You gently place her on the floor and give her a kiss. “Let’s get you undressed.”

“That’s what I’m talking about.” Jessie smirks at you.

“No, you were just falling asleep on the bed.”

She pouts at you, arms crossed. You gently take her wrists, undoing the cufflinks of her dress shirt and then sliding off her tuxedo coat. Your fingers move to the buttons on her vest, undoing those and helping her remove it. Lastly is her dress shirt, she works from the top down as you work to undo the bottom of her shirt. Your hands meet in the middle and she pulls the shirt off and quickly follows it with her sports bra.

“My beautiful wife.” You lean down placing kisses across her exposed skin. While your mouth stays kissing her chest, your fingers move to her belt, undoing it and sliding it out from her pants. She undoes the button on her slacks and lets them fall to the floor. You hands find the elastic of her boxers and you slowly pull them down. Moving your head from her chest you place kisses along both of her thighs as you remove her underwear.

“You’re turn.” She says, you turn away from her to allow her access to the zipper and ties on your dress.

Jessie’s hands find the top tie and begin undoing the knot. “Have I told you enough how beautiful you look?” She says as her fingers move to the next tie. “Absolutely stunning, you took my breath away.” Her hands then move to the zipper, undoing the rest of the dress. She brings her hands up to where the top of the dress sat. She begins pulling it off of your body, similarly to your actions she brings her lips, placing them on every inch of skin on your back she exposes pulling down your dress.

Jessie extends a hand to you to help you step out and over the dress. “Wow.” She takes the time to look you up and down. You had bought a new set of lingerie for the wedding. It was a lacy white set, one you knew would make your wife crazy. “Where did you get this?” Her fingers work into the straps of the bra.

“Oh you know, just something I had lying around.” You joke with her. Her eyes are locked on your chest. “Quit staring, I’ll put it on again tomorrow for you to fully enjoy.” The comment had Jessie biting her lip, likely thinking of what she’d get to do to you after a good night's sleep.

You move your own hands to your bra, unclasping the back while Jessie’s thumbs hook into your matching panties and pull them down your legs. She comes back up to meet your lips with hers.

You both stay for a second, grinning at each other, both overwhelmed with happiness. You pull away to start the shower, while you wait for it to run warm you pull Jessie into your arms, hugging from behind. You turn the two of you toward the mirror above the vanity.

“Look at my wife.” You point in the mirror at Jessie’s figure in front of you.

“Ehh she’s alright but look at my wife!” She teases you back, pointing at you in the mirror.

“I love you, wife.”

“I love you, wife”

Your arms release her, giving her a quick squeeze with your hand on her shoulders. “Let’s hurry up and shower so we can sleep and then tomorrow we can do all the consummating you want.” You give her a wink and she quickly follows you into the shower, the two of you having a moment of peace and relaxation after the day’s festivities. As you looked at her in the shower, you couldn’t help but think how it was just the two of you, and that was all you would ever need. You and her.

#jessie fleming #jessie fleming x reader #jflem #jessie fleming imagine #woso imagine #woso x reader #canwnt x reader

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nobody-nexus · 27 days

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Obsession AU: UPDATED

I promise I didn't forget about this AU- In fact I've been updating it behind the scenes ever since episode 2 released! And now, with proper reference sheets, you now have a better idea of what they look like, and who they are! Alongside the new members!

(5 Facts About Pomni)

-She will never feed human meat to any person. It is THEIR hunt, and therefore if she eats it, it's ALL THEIRS. She'd never give it to others for that very reason

-Their hands are heavily damaged, having MANY scars. Due to this, she will wear as much hand covering as possible, refusing to give any more details on their appearance due to her record

-As if their stalker like obsession with Amanda isn't enough of an issue, she also has a mannequin in their home that she practices dancing with to old songs they like

-She has Hematolagnia- AKA a blood fetish. YES, she has issues if that wasn't already clear enough

-The scars that are on their body are from self-defense attempts from three different victims

(5 Facts About Amanda)

-Her damaged eye is from an incident where a kid hit her with a meat cleaver. Although she thankfully didn't lose her eye, she's 1/3rd blind and legally isn't allowed to drive because of it

-She knows how to cook! Although she does more baking than cooking, she loves to collect cookbooks and learn new recipes of various kinds! Especially ones from outside the United States

-She has scented candles in her home, and her home never smells like the same thing twice

-While she was away from her hometown, the only one that she kept in contact with was her brother, Jackson via text

-Her vitiligo started to pop up when she was 19

(5 Facts About Jackson)

-He is Zoey's roommate

-Jackson was an accidental child unlike his older sister

-He plays violent video games of all kinds. He loves being able to cause blood, death, and chaos without having to go to jail for it

-He likes sour candy a bit too much. Like it's a borderline issue with how much he's willing to pay just for sour candy and the feeling of it numbing his mouth

-Has a habit of stealing and shoplifting, being a bit TOO good at the action. He's gotten in trouble a few times before, but nowadays no one really seems to notice or care

(5 Facts About Grace)

-Grace was born an albino, having the palest skin out of most people in the town along with red eyes and white hair. It's unknown if her being albino was why she was so sickly as a child

-She loves to draw and will constantly have drawing/writing tools with her alongside notebooks or loose paper

-She's in the middle of quite the complicated situation between Amanda and Pomni

-Her most eaten food is soup, stew, and ramen

-She sees Ceaser as a father figure, being the most to visit him and keep him company ever since Quinn went missing. She'll occasionally even sing for him to make him feel better

(5 Facts About Zoey)

-They're very talented on the drums and are willing to be a temporary drummer for a price

-Zoey has a bit of an anger problem, quick to snap and easy to piss off given the topic of discussion. However, they are going to anger management classes to help with it

-Strangling is a common attack it does

-They decorate their prosthetic leg commonly

-VERY much smokes weed and makes edibles. Once tricked Amanda into eating some- and it likes the memory

(5 Facts About Kinger)

-He has a bit of a staring problem, however no one knows why

-He refuses to touch knives of any kind. This was a more recent thing about him, so most people just help him cut things in case he needs any help with it

-Still loves insects, and you can get him to ramble about bugs depending on his mood. He can't help but love em

-He has a nurse help him in his home, however it's not uncommon for Grace, Amanda, or even some of the new outbackers to come back and help him

-Has a daughter, but she moved out of state years ago. They talk occasionally

(5 Facts About Caine)

-He wears a top hat to not only stick to his brand, but also because he's kind of compensating for his height

-He has a small limp to his walk, thus why he constantly has a cane

-Caine's pet is a white pug named Bubble

-Pomni is his favorite customer! He constantly attempts small talk whenever she buys from him because he's always so curious as to why his pigs love her so much

-Although it's undiagnosed, he very much has ADHD and is on the spectrum to some degree

(5 Facts About Marina)

-She was a detective before she even moved into town, however her skills were finally noticed more so thanks to moving there

-She straightens out her hair

-Marina HAS to work in silence or she'll 100% get distracted. Caine's not allowed in her office for that very reason (but he knows)

-She is usually the one to come home late at night and snuggle in with her partner at like 2 in the morning

-Her favorite activity to do is stargazing, finding the night sky to be absolutly beautiful

(5 Facts About Summer)

-She is LOUD. You can and WILL know when she's talking and what she's talking about

-Constantly will ask her sister Marina about Caine. She is VERY wary of him even if Marina keeps telling her to stop

-Never share secrets with her because she IS a gossip girl. She adores to overshare about others and spread rumors just because she finds it fun

-Summer's seen to be a lot better around kids then people closer to her age. Thus why she's a teacher

-Can NOT let go of grudges no matter what

(5 Facts About Gabriela)

-She was the one who came up with the idea of the stripper outfits for her club. It somehow works

-She calls herself the 'Gloink Queen' as a bit of a joke whenever she's on the floor

-Can, will, and HAS flirted with at least half of the adult residence in the town just for the fun of it

-Although she claims to be married, no one has ever met her husband before, and probably never will

-Gabriela is the reason Pomni sees adult based activities as more of a transaction than anything else

(5 Facts About Gareth)

-He has a picture of his mom in his wallet. His mom nicknamed him Gummi at some point, but it's not known why

-He seems bossy, but only around his friends OR when he's upset. He's a lot more chill when one on one

-He has a manual truck that he drives around, but no one is ever impressed by it

-The reason he's good with skinning and cutting up meat is because he helped his dad since his father was a hunter

-His favorite music is country music

(5 Facts About Max)

-He's the one who came up with the idea that him, Gareth, and Chad all wore hats. He somehow convinced them to do so

-He bickers with Jackston a lot because they're both working at the same diner

-Out of the three friends, he's the most likely to flirt with someone, but if they reject him he will respect the fuck out of that

-Constantly forgets how NOT flexible he is as a person, will and has gotten stuck in multiple locations

-Always calls things that almost killed him 'the reaper'. He has also almost died WAY too many times

(5 Facts About Chad)

-He has a super high metabolism, thus why he's so skinny

-Usually carried medication in his fanny pack alongside trail mix and breath mints for some reason

-He's trying SO hard to grow facial hair, but it never cooperates with him like ever

-Chad has a habit of slumping/crouching constantly, and he has back pain as a result

-Is the most likely out of the friend group to be VERY confidently incorrect

(5 Facts About Loo)

-She was born in Britain but moved to the United States for an easier start. Who know it'd lead to being the mayor of a town?

-She's been the mayor for about 5 years by the time Amanda moves back to the town

-She dyes her hair cause she doesn't like the grays that have started to pop up

-She's painfully oblivious to how unhinged the town can be sometimes

-Loo hates being called Penelope unless it's by close friends or family

(5 Facts About Ivy)

-Although she DOES shower, just speaking to them makes you think it doesn't actually shower

-She never thinks before they speak, leading in incredibly horrid things leaving its mouth in common conversation

-Ivy is the only one who actually knows Pomni is a killer, however she finds it very attractive (this is NOT a good thing)

-Their diet consists of purely junk food and as a result it has basically a beer belly

-She has a dark/deep web fanbase, and they simply refer to itself as 'The Influencer' on the web

================================================

If you have any questions, feel free to ask me!

If you want to make your own OC for this AU, here's the blank sheet for it!

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cobaltperun · 5 months

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Lost (19) - Where I belong

Tara Carpenter x female Reader

Summary: To anyone on the outside, and to Tara’s friends, you were Tara’s fierce protector, the MMA fighter who’d take anyone on for Tara. The Guard Dog, as Amber called you. You had no idea you’d have to protect her from people who claimed they loved her. It didn’t matter. As long as you and Tara had one another there was nothing you wouldn’t be able to survive.

Story warnings: Scream violence, family issues, trauma, angst, certain sensitive topics

Word count: 3.8k

Story masterlist / First part / Previous part / Next part

-So take my slow beating heart, you are where I belong-

You stood in front of two gravestones, feeling ashamed that it took you this long to come here. “Sorry I’m late, I didn’t bring anything, didn’t feel like I deserved to,” you still knelt down to pull some grass that began growing around the two graves. No one really attended to them, they had no one, after all. In this huge city Susan’s life stopped when she lost Zack, and she no longer had anyone that might take care of the graves, no close friend, no family. She only had her memories and, ever since you brought Tara and Sam to Sacramento, she had you and Tara. “Tara would have come as well, but, I have to deal with someone, I didn’t want to put her in danger or leave her alone here,” you explained, remembering the resigned acceptance on Tara’s face when you told her what your plan was.

“Thomas… he brought up something, he said you were the only one who would choose me over anyone else,” you said, digging your hands into the pockets of your coat, it was getting a bit cold, and a strong wind blew in your face, forcing you to squint a bit. “I’ve been thinking about that. Somewhat. Would I have acted any differently last year if I knew you’d be in danger?” you didn’t have the answer. On one side you knew you cared about Susan even back then, simply because of the time you spent with her and Zack and, more importantly, because she was Zack’s mother. On the other side Tara was in danger.

“What-ifs are pointless anyway,” you spoke. It was a stupid question, a one or the other question where you’d be forced to choose. How ridiculous. Life wasn’t as simple as that. Take last year for example. At first glance it was a choice between Tara and Susan, but you did have the third option, San Francisco, where your gym at the time was. Or simply a hotel, if that didn’t work, if you knew you’d be putting Susan in danger you simply would have taken Tara somewhere else. Hell, just taking her to your apartment would have been a good way to keep her safe.

You still felt like you caused her death, even if you kept telling Tara and Sam they weren’t to blame for what happened you somehow failed to take your own advice. No wonder those two had such deep issues. “I’m sorry for dragging you into this, for not being there when you needed me,” you said as several tears slid down you cheeks. “I should have told you so many things,” you told her you loved her in a voice mail sent long after she was dead. Life had a funny way of being cruel sometimes.

~X~

The house hasn't changed much since you turned eighteen, you saw they changed the doors, but other than that it was exactly how you remembered it. A three-story house that screamed 'we're rich!' to anyone passing by, with its over-the-top fence and decorations, and the damn marble lions looking down on whoever went through their gate.

You typed in the code, your father's birthday, disabling the locks on the first try. Of course, those two wouldn't bother to change it. You were just happy you managed to remember it. And so, you came inside the house and sat down in the living room, waiting for the parents to come back home. You looked around, the house was the same on the outside but on the inside? Brand new furniture. More expensive than comfortable, really, but you just closed your eyes and waited. If you looked at it for too long you were worried, you'd start breaking things.

An hour later the doors opened, and you heard your parents laughing, joking about whatever they found funny that day. This was one of the reasons you felt so suffocated in this house, because, almost as if to convince you that you were the problem and not them, they were loving to one another. Laughing, singing praises of one another, exchanging words of affirmation, but never quite choosing to express their feelings through touches. Now that you thought about it maybe that was why you were so adamant about having Tara in your arms as often as you could, why touch was your preferred love language for her specifically.

"Long time no see," you enjoyed seeing them jump when they saw you, they looked like they saw a ghost, they looked afraid. "I'd say it's a pleasure to be here again, but we both know it's not."

"Y/N," your father spoke, and you saw him taking a step back. Funny how you never noticed just how little it took to startle him. He would have been less than average if he wasn't born into money, in fact, from what you read in Gale's brief research on the company it was in decline for years now, only surviving on old reputation and questionable deals. The fact that you and Zack were his children pissed you off.

"Let's be quick about this. Thomas is dead, I'm very much alive despite your efforts and I want to be left alone, so don't try to hire another hitman to kill me or my loved ones," you spoke evenly.

"Or else what?" he acted like he actually could negotiate anything here.

You stood up, and while you lost some muscle due to coma and slow recovery you could still look intimidating enough. "I die and your entire reputation is done for. I revealed everything, one wrong move and it all goes public," you saw fear in their eyes as you walked past them. For good measure, you stopped at the front door and turned to glare at them. "Six people came after me, one way or another, all six are dead and I don't mind adding a few more to that list. I'd just prefer not to dirty my hands with your blood unless I have to," you left no doubt that you would if needed.

You wanted revenge for what happened to Susan, but you couldn't prove they hired Thomas.

So, this would have to do, unless they tried again. So, you left the house, slamming the doors behind you and hoping you would never have to hear or see them.

~X~

You wouldn’t stick around Woodsboro for long, but you did drop by your former bosses to grab a bite and see how they were doing. The old couple did so much for you, renting that small apartment, giving you a job, they deserved you gratitude, but given what happened to Susan, you were cautious, afraid that being associated with you could cause them harm. Still, they were happy to see you, and you were just as happy to hear they were doing well. It was a busy day at the restaurant, and you were glad their business was doing so well, but it also meant they didn’t have time to chat, which was more than okay with you.

While you waited for your meal you went and called Tara, and she answered withing three seconds, which frankly didn’t surprise you.

“Y/N?” you could hear the worry in her voice.

“Hey, I’m fine, they won’t bother us again, they know what’s at stake for them,” you told her, easing her worries as quickly as you could.

You heard Tara sighing in relief and smiled a bit. “Thank goodness! I was losing my mind over here!”

“I’m okay, Love,” you assured her softly, your tone the complete opposite of her panicking, worry filled voice, even now that she heard you were okay.

“When are you coming back?” she asked andyou could imagine her fidgeting in your shirt with Sam trying to calm her down.

You looked around, no one was paying attention to you from what you could see. “I have the flight back in the morning, I’ll head back to Sacramento in an hour and spend the night in the hotel,” you told her, though you kept your voice low just in case. Were there reasons to be worried? Probably not, but you weren’t in top shape, you couldn’t fight that well right now.

“Okay, stay safe, please. I love you, Y/N,” Tara sent you a kiss through the phone and you smiled like a fool.

“I will, I love you too, Tara,” you replied.

~X~

Tara was waiting for you at the airport, she even let Sam drive your car because she knew you'd lose your mind over her driving it. She couldn't wipe the smile off her face, you called her after you left your parents' house, reassuring her you were perfectly fine and that you'd be on the first flight home. She was still worried, but she trusted you completely.

Tara still couldn't quite wrap her head around the fact that your parents were involved. Her mother was definitely not a good parent, but as bad as she was, Tara doubted she would hire someone to kill her or Sam. Thomas' words came to her mind and her smile fell. Suddenly she felt vulnerable, surrounded by people she didn’t know. Everything around her felt too loud, too intense, there were too many people, and any one of them could put her and the people she loved in danger. She couldn’t live like that, she couldn’t constantly worry that she would somehow end up in the situation Thomas described. She had to move on, to the best of her abilities, and without parties and alcohol this time. The therapy was helping her, but more than that it was her desire to be as happy as she could be with you that pushed her to get even better. You’d be back home soon, and that thought helped her handle the bustling crowd a bit easier.

"What's wrong?" Sam asked her and placed an arm around her shoulders to comfort her.

Tara wanted to talk to Sam about it, but how could she? How could she say to her sister that she'd feel immeasurable guilt if she had to choose her instead of you? Prior to what happened at the bodega and especially before what happened at the theatre, she would say she'd never have to make that choice. You were strong. So, so incredibly strong, the idea of anyone actually being able to beat you felt unfathomable.

Yes, you technically were beaten when you first fought Amber and Richie, but that was because she was taken hostage and you still managed to get back on your feet and take her to safety. Stabs and bullet wounds, they couldn't stop you. A heart attack couldn't stop you. Even when you were hurt you could keep going, as you have proven time and time again.

When Tara thought of strength, she thought of you. To imagine a situation in which your life relied on her choice was almost impossible. To then add Sam being in a similar situation, and to further all that by saying Tara could only save one of you. It was beyond the realms of possibility to her.

But then you nearly died. Then it took you sixteen days to wake up and several days to even get up. You managed to lift her up off the ground right before you left New York, two days ago, and you struggled. You struggled to lift Tara up. You never struggled to do that, and Tara actually lost some weight since you nearly died. She just found it difficult to eat while you were in a coma, and she was yet to regain the weight she lost.

The image of an invisible MMA fighter was shattered and now Tara woke up, screaming and covered in cold sweat, from yet another nightmare that had you in that ambulance with doctors saying they couldn't stop your bleeding. That they were losing you. More often than not, when she would wake up like that you'd sit up and hug her right away and she could see in your eyes that you were awake long before she'd wake up. She still didn't know if you were having nightmares or if you couldn't sleep to begin with.

So, no. She couldn't say any of this to Sam. "Sorry, I was just thinking," she apologized to Sam, clamming up and refusing to talk. She still leaned to the side and returned the one-armed hug.

Tara noticed you immediately, even among the huge crowd she somehow always easily found you. And from the way you were already heading toward her, she knew it was the same way for you. She ran into your arms and despite some hesitation on her part, she didn't resist when you lifted her up, just a bit easier than when you left. "I don't think we need to worry about those two again," you muttered into her neck as you slowly set her back down.

"Mhm," Tara just relaxed, carefully remembering every detail of your hugs. She basked in the warmth of your touch through one of your shirts she had on. Your scent, your breath against her exposed neck, the firm grip on her waist it was all you and she loved it.

When she separated from you Sam took her opportunity and hugged you as well. "Welcome back," she said, prompting you to smile.

"It's good to be back," you said, and Tara understood you weren't talking just about coming back from Woodsboro. You were still rather thankful for waking up from a coma without any lasting effects on your health. "How's the apartment hunting going, by the way?" you asked.

"We found one, we like it, we think you'll like it as well," Sam said.

Tara, not wanting to leave your side for even a moment now that you were away from her for two days, took your hand and pulled you along.

~X~

By the end of the week, you moved into your new apartment. It had three bedrooms, once again you chose to have one bedroom for the nights someone from your group chose to stay over. It was a bit bare, without much of a personal touch, and you were sure Tara would take it upon herself to change that about it as soon as she got time for that.

You thought the new apartment would chase away the nightmares, at least until you got used to it, but it didn't.

You saw them, sitting in Susan’s living room, looking healthy, alive, happy. That’s how it always started, you’d enter the house and see Susan and Zack just like that. And then, as if you were an intruder that interrupted their lives, they’d turn to you and they’d change. They’d morph from how you remembered them into twisted abominations, rotting and carved up and enraged.

And every time Zack would attack you, pushing you back and doing his signature spinning back kick, the move he taught you. It would always send you hitting the wall, and making his gloves fall from it to the floor, and they’d always roll over into your view. He’d then put you in a chokehold, and even if you wanted to you just wouldn’t move.

“Why?! Why did you let my mom die Y/N?!” he would demand again and again, and you’d look up to see the disappointment in Susan’s eyes.

“You killed me, if it wasn’t for you I’d still be alive,” she’d tell you.

You didn’t beg for forgiveness, or to be let go, not anymore. You’d just wake up, covered in cold sweat and breathing heavily.

You couldn't sit up though, instinctively choosing not to wake Tara up, so at least there was that. She had her own nightmares to deal with and soon enough, perhaps twenty minutes after you woke up Tara woke up as well, screaming. So, you immediately pulled her into a hug, her inhaler at ready in case she needed it.

Tara crawled onto your lap and pressed her face against the crook of your neck. "What are you dreaming about?" she asked, almost sounding afraid. In fact, she probably was afraid to ask that questions.

"Susan and Zack, blaming me for Susan's death," you admitted and Tara just hugged you tighter.

"It wasn't your fault. It's none of our fault lunatics want to hurt us," she said, repeating your words right back at you, and you nodded. Reasonably, you knew that, but it would still take a while to have a peaceful sleep.

"What about you?" you asked as you slowly played with a few strands of Tara's hair.

"I have nightmares of you in the ambulance, only you don't wake up this time, you die, I lose you," you felt a tear landing on the skin of your neck and gently kissed the top of Tara's head.

"I'm awake, Love, I heard your voice," even when you were in a coma you were vaguely aware of Tara always being by your side, and when you were ready to wake up it was her voice and touch that sped it up.

Tara pulled away slightly. "About what Thomas said," she began, but you pressed a finger against her mouth.

"It doesn't matter. It'll never happen. The situation will never be so dire," you said firmly, you couldn’t let her get stuck in those thoughts, Tara already had enough to deal with without Thomas’ words fucking with her head. “I will never let anyone force that choice on you!" you promised and you'd keep that promise as long as you were alive.

Tara took a deep breath to calm down. “I know it’s an unlikely scenario, but still,” she muttered. “I can’t stand the idea of choosing between you and Sam. It feels like I’d give anything up for Sam, other than you, and the same goes the other way around,” she told you, shivering due to the cold. It was December after all.

“I’d scold you if it was any different,” you told her, you didn’t want Tara to ever again go through losing Sam. That was one thing you were absolutely certain of. No matter the cost, you would keep your family whole and that included Sam. You lost Susan, you never wanted to lose anyone else you loved in such a violent way.

Tara nodded. “I know, I’m counting on you to do that,” she managed to smile a bit before kissing you softly and you gently returned the kiss. It took some time, but you were both slowly getting better and talking about your trauma instead of bottling it up.

~X~

A week later you finally settled into your new apartment, and Sam was finally fine with leaving you two alone to go on a, preferably long, date with Danny. He really came through for all of you, bringing the police and paramedics to the theatre, not to mention finding you, which probably saved your life. He mentioned he heard a loud thud and went to check, hoping it was nothing, but there you were, bleeding out next to dead Thomas. So, as far as you and Tara were concerned, he was clear to move in whenever Sam decided she wanted to take that step.

You just stepped out of the shower after a workout, which actually went really well. You finally felt confident enough to get up with Tara in your arms, to carry her whenever she wanted you to, plain and simple you were doing much better now that you were building your strength back up.

The moment you entered your and Tara's bedroom she threw her arms around you and pulled you into a kiss. She clutched the back of your shirt and ran her fingers through your hair, tugging gently as she deepened the kiss. You wrapped your arms around her and pulled her as close to you as physically possible.

"So needy," you chuckled when she pulled back for a moment.

"Like you aren't?" she challenged, looking fiercely into your eyes.

"Mhm, I definitely am," it's been too long, way too long since you could just relax and make love to one another. You leaned down, kissing her neck.

"Baby," she moaned when you nipped at the side of her neck and you immediately pulled back, looking at her wide-eyed. Tara blushed but kept looking at you. "Baby, please," she said again, acting as if she never stopped saying that word all the while gently caressing the back of your neck.

There was a reason Amber chose to persistently call Tara 'baby', specifically, you were the reason because Tara would call you like that jokingly whenever you weren't immediately giving in to her demands. She stopped when she got together with Amber and just never went back to calling you like that.

"Say it again," you demanded, lifting her up, taking a few steps to the side and pushing her against the wall.

"Baby," she moaned into your ear as you unbuttoned the top buttons of her, previously your, button-up shirt and yanked it down, and since it was way too big for her it just fell from her shoulders.

"Again, Love," every time she said it you were more and more certain she would be able to completely get over what Amber did to her, that she'd eventually fully heal.

"Baby!" she cried out, maybe even a bit too loudly as you began kissing her bare shoulders and tugging the straps of her bra down.

"You are where I belong Tara," you pulled back, pressing your forehead against hers. She quickly captured your lips, making you both get lost in the passion. When you separated to catch your breath you looked her in the eyes.

It was a demand fueled by lust and desire and need for Tara, all fueled by the love you had for her. Nonetheless, you doubted you ever demanded anything with as much conviction and seriousness. "Spend the rest of your life with me. Marry me," you'd go through all the proper proposal stuff at a more appropriate time, but you couldn't stop yourself from blurting it out.

Tara looked at you just for a moment. Taking the demand in. "Thought you'd never ask," she smiled and kissed you one more time. The pent up needs, desires and all the emotions, you’d satisfy them all, getting lost in one another until there was nothing else left in to world but you two and your love for one another.

#tara carpenter x reader #tara carpenter x you #tara carpenter x female reader #tara carpenter #scream #jenna ortega x reader #x reader

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sweetiepoison · 2 months

Text

Famous Baby (blurb)

The Final Straw

Warnings: verbal argument, angst, smut (oral receiving and giving, P in V) buckle up bc this is an emotional rollercoaster.”

“You’re so rude!”

“And you’re selfish!”

You scoffed, “Im selfish because I don’t think you need to make a speech?”

“It’s a congratulatory speech.” Auston clarified, “on behalf of the team-“

“The only people that need to make a speech are Justin and Ryan.” You cut him off placing your hands on your hips, “The owners of the company.”

Drew House was turning 5 and Justin’s mom had the idea to put together a party to celebrate the accomplishment. She wanted it to be big and filled with Justin’s friends, family, and the things he loved the most.

So she planned a few different meetings for everyone to get together which unfortunately for you included Auston you flew to LA specifically for this.

“So I can’t make a speech, but you get to sing a song?”

“Do you want us all to sit in silence the whole night?”

“Dj’s have a job for a reason.” Auston crossed his arms over his chest. “And they can play actual good songs.”

On any other day Auston’s jab about your music wouldn’t bother you. You deemed him useless and untalented musically speaking. But today, the comment put you over the edge.

You took a deep breath before calmly responding “Hire whoever you want Auston, I don’t care.”

Your cold tone, took Auston back. He didn’t expect you to switch it up so quickly. And only two outcomes were plausible now. The argument ends here or you were about to go off.

Auston knew this was a fragile moment and how he responded would determine the outcome. He should’ve just silently agreed or even gave into your idea, but he was stubborn and good at self sabotaging.

“You do care.” He pointed out, “If you didn’t you would’ve shut up at the beginning of this discussion and let me be in charge.”

And that was enough for your deep breaths and the counting method your therapist taught you to avoid outbursts to be forgotten.

“You know what Auston, no asked you to be in charge because they know you suck at it.” You’re voice rose with every word, “If you were good at being in charge you would have a winning team, but you don’t.” The venom in your words were no competition for the fury that filled your eyes, “The only reason you are relevant enough to even be sitting here is because Justin loves hockey. It’s not because you encouraged him to build the brand, or supported him every step of the way, or put in money for it to be successful.” You listed off what the others in the room, Justin’s friends and family, had done do ensure his success. “You’ve done nothing, but show up and ruin things, so you can sit down and shut up, because no one here cares about what you think.”

“Is that why you wrote a song about me.” Auston challenged, “because you don’t care about what I think?”

Your mouth went dry and your throat felt like it was beginning to close up. You swallowed thickly, refusing to let the tears that so badly wanted to come out make an appearance. This couldn’t be happening. Despite the release of your new single you told no one who it was about, now Auston just did that for you.

“That’s it. I’m done.” Your chair squeaked as you abruptly stood from it. “Auston, go fuck your self, Scooter, I quite.”

You stormed out of the room the door slamming behind you. The table fell silent following your exit, no one knowing what to say or do.”

“Go get her.” Scooter, Justin’s manager sighed rubbing his face.

“No, we don’t need her, especially if she doesn’t want to be here.” Auston sat back in his chair crossing his arms.

“She was one of the most important people sitting at this table. Scooter paused, “Go. Get. Her.”

“She’s a big girl, she made her choice. And now you want me to chase after her?”

“I don’t care if you have to get down on your knees and beg for her forgiveness, she better be sitting at this table tomorrow.” He finalized standing up himself, the discussion was over.

Auston didn’t follow you immediately, his pride too strong. He waited until the evening when he had no choice but to fix things. There was less than 12 hours until everyone would meet again.

He reluctantly drove to your apartment after getting the address and penthouse number from Hailey.

Auston tapped his hands on his legs waiting for the elevator to arrive at the top floor. He could think of a million things he would rather do than apologize to you, but his friendship meant more than his dislike toward you.

Following your show in Arizona, Auston made it his mission to push down any type of feelings he had for you. The two of you together would be complicated and that was something he couldn’t deal with, not at the start of the season.

Between the time he knocked on the door and you answering, he debated just leaving, but he didn’t have the time to do that once you answered. Auston couldn’t keep his eyes from wondering down your body at the short cotton shorts that hugged your hips and the cropped tank top that dipped down to show cleavage. His thoughts were only interrupted by your voice.

“Can I help you.”

“Ummm yeah,” he stammered forgetting what he had planned to say eyes still focused on the way you leaned against the doorway, one arm holding open the door as the other rested on your hip. “I wanted to apologize.”

“Apologize for what?” You showed no emotion, but didn’t miss the way he had yet to look you in the eyes.

“This afternoon.” Auston finally looked up meeting your eyes with his own. “Saying those things.”

“Yeah, that’s sounds really sincere.”

“Can you please just let me in so we can actually talk?” Auston huffed annoyed that you were holding your ground.

You rolled your eyes but stepped to the side to allow him in. You closed the door and walked past him to the couch in the center of the room. “Okay, start apologizing.”

Auston sighed sitting on the wooden coffee table across from the couch. “Listen, (y/n), I’m sorry for what I said. I was angry and,” he sighed again frustrated at the lack of words coming to mind, “and I’m just really sorry.”

“Wow, that was more pathetic than the first attempt.” You crossed your arms, “but I’m not surprised considering you never apologize for anything. This is probably a lot for you, trying to use words with more than one syllable.”

“You done?”

“No.” You shook your head sitting up straight. “It’s one thing for you to not like me, but embarrassing me like that when you know that song was vulnerable for me, was just mean.”

There was lots of gossip surrounding the song you revealed at your show. Later that night you released the recorded version and the next morning it was everywhere. The discussion about who it could be about was a hot topic, everyone wanted to know, but no one did. Even when your best friends asked who it was about you brushed it off saying it wasn’t about anyone specific it was just a concept you thought of.

“I wasn’t thinking.”

“You never think!” You shouted, “you just say things and do things without thinking about the consequences.”

“I apologized what else do you want from me?” Auston shouted back throwing his arms in the air.

“Nothing.” You stood up and stormed toward the door and holding it open. “Get the fuck out.”

“What the hell is your problem?”

“You. You’re my problem. Now leave.”

“Im not leaving until we figure this out.” Auston responded not looking at you and refusing to stand.

“You don’t get to decide when this conversation is over. You are apologizing to me.”

“Then fucking accept my apology if you want me to leave.”

“No. Your “apology” was terrible.” You put air quotes around the word apology allowing the door to close in the process.

“Then I’m not leaving.”

“Fine, then I’m calling security.” You announced attempting to make your way to the phone on the side table by the couch, but Auston blocked your path.

“Move.” You threatened trying to push past him, but Auston wouldn’t budge.

“Will you just…stop being so fucking difficult?” Auston held onto your arms to try and keep you in place.

“No.” You pulled your arms back with a surprising amount of strength, but Auston got to the phone before you could and threw it across the room.

“What the hell is your problem?” You reiterated his question from earlier.

“You. You’re my problem.” His voice came out strained.

Both of you stood chest to chest breathing heavily. Auston looked down at you, he wanted to walk away but he couldn’t. Watching you so worked up, breathless from arguing and cheeks red. You looked so pretty, and you were standing so close, and he was so turned on. So he didn’t think, he just acted as he leaned down, one hand placed on your neck and kissed you.

You wish you say your initial reaction was to pull away, but it wasn’t. You sank into the kiss like you had been waiting for years for it. Your fingers clasped together around his neck as his free hand found a home on your hip.

You kissed for a long time taking turns opening your mouths wider giving the other person more access, neither of you coming up for air. Auston sat down on the couch, pulling you down with him. You kissed down his neck as you straddled his waist. Auston’s hands rubbed up and down your back under your tank top as you continued working down his neck and back up nipping at his earlobe. He tugged lifting your tank top over your head and tossing it in the corner.

“Fuck.” He groaned noticing that you decided to not wear a bra with it leaving your bare chest in front of him. Auston dipped down to kiss the valley between your breast before taking one of your nipples in his mouth. You moaned at the attention he gave them.

“You drive me crazy.” You whined raking your fingers through his hair.

“The feelings mutual.” He mumbled coming up from your chest and planting a kiss on your lips. You only broke the kiss to remove his shirt and then your hands were back on his body as his lips were back on yours.

“Stand up.” Auston demanded nudging you his knee. You did as told and watched as Auston got down on his knees in front of you without breaking eye contact. He couldn’t help but chuckling thinking back to what Scooter said about getting on his knees to beg for forgiveness. Watching the way your legs clenched looking at him, Auston knew he would get on his knees for you whenever you wanted.

You knew this was all wrong. You hated him and he hated you, but watching him hook his fingers in your panties and sliding them down your legs, that was right.

Auston placed kisses along your inner thighs before he tapped your leg “separate them.”

You couldn’t help the loud moan that escaped your lips as Auston’s tongue met your clit. You latched your fingers back into his hair and attempted to steady yourself. Auston held you firm as he continued to lick and suck like he had been walking in the desert for days and you were his first sip of water.

Your legs only became weaker as you felt him slip two fingers inside of you. They pumped at a rapid pace and you began falling apart around them.

“Aus, I-“ you started but couldn’t finish as you moaned loudly. The combination of his tongue and his fingers had you closing your eyes and seeing stars as you came calling out his name.

“I know, baby, I got you.” He reassured picking you up in his arms. You wrapped your legs around his waist as he carried you to the bedroom. Auston placed you down as he stood at the foot of the bed.

“You out on quite the performance earlier.” You watched as he reached for his belt. “Calling me a bad leader, screaming about how I’ve ruined things.” He slowly removed his belt and unzipped his pants. “And my favorite,” he smirked climbing onto the bed. “Telling me to sit down and shut up.”

Auston leaned back into the pillows and placed clasped his hands together behind his head.

“I’m going to do that now and I want you to suck my dick until I’m whimpering like you just were.” You couldn’t help the way your body reacted to that statement.

“C’mon baby, I know how much you love performing.” He smirked down at you as you crawled between his legs, “put on a show for me.”

You swirled your tongue around his tip before slowly taking more of him into your mouth. You hollowed your cheeks and went down on him until he was touching the back of your throat.

“Keep doing that.” He encouraged as you used your right hand to twist and stroke the part you couldn’t fit. You let your mouth and hand move in a rhythmic motion.

“Just like that.” Auston panted eyes shut tightly.

“Open your eyes.” You moved him out of your mouth to make the request. Auston continued to breathe deeply eyes still shut. “I won’t continue until you open them.” You threatened waiting for him to look down at you.

“Good.” You said satisfied as he looked down. You hummed around him taking him further down your throat. It wasn’t long until Auston was grinding his teeth together to keep himself from finishing.

“I want to be inside of you.” He said pushing gently on your shoulder to stop you. Auston flipped you over so he was back on top. After stroking himself a few times he aligned himself with you.

“Absolutely not.” You grabbed his wrist. “Put a condom on, I don’t know who you’ve stuck that in.”

Auston chuckled reaching into the bedside table, while kissing your neck “it feels better without it.” His breath was hot against your ear and you’d be lying if you said it didn’t make you rethink.

“I don’t care. I’m not catching something from you, that would make this whole situation even more embarrassing.”

“Oh, baby, there’s nothing embarrassing about how good I’m going to make you feel.” Auston slid the condom on like you asked before thrusting into you. You immediately wrapped your legs around his waist wanting him as deep as possible. Auston dipped down kissing you roughly as he worked his hips into yours.

You two moved in synch, like you’ve done this before. As his hips went down, yours went up to meet in the middle, hitting the perfect angle.

“Tell me you want me.” His request was so soft you almost didn’t hear it.

“I do.” You reassured him, knowing your mind was made up in the living room that this was what you wanted.

“No. I want to hear you say it.” His voice was strained as he rested his face in your neck.

“I want you, Auston.” Your words seemed to encourage him as he picked up the pace.

“You’ve had a funny way of showing you wanted me.”

“Says the guy who called me overrated.”

“Says the girl who called me selfish and arrogant.”

“Says the guy who made me cry and exposed to everyone that I wrote a song about him.

Auston stopped moving his hips for a moment and met your eyes seriously, “you cried?”

“Im sensitive.” You shrugged “Plus I got an awesome song out of it, which is doing really well on the charts. So, ya know….it worked out.”

“Look at me.” Auston grabbed your chin to bring your eyes back to him, “I’m sorry.”

“It’s whatever.” You brushed off the apology with a wave of your hand.

“No, (y/n),” There was something earnest in Auston’s eyes, a mixture of pleading but also reassurance “I’m, so sorry for hurting you like that.”

“I know.” You reassured him placing a hand on his cheek and brushing his hair out of his face gently. He may have been the one apologizing but you wanted to comfort him, reassure him that you truly forgave him, for all of it.

The moment felt intimate, romantic even and that was too much for Auston. It was one thing for him to fuck you, but a whole different thing if you thought it was anything more than that.

If there was one thing you agreed on it was that you both had very busy schedules and that you both were too selfish with your time to commit to something serious. The last thing either of you needed was love.

“Flip over.” He instructed

“Huh?” You looked up at him, and unlike the moment before Auston looked away.

“I want to take you from behind.” Auston watched as a look of hurt crossed your face, but it was only for a moment before you were doing as you were told.

Auston slipped himself into you again and began moving like before. He found the perfect pace again and had you screaming his name within minutes. He gave you a minute before he started back up. He wanted you to cum again. Partly because he wanted to make up for being such an asshole but a bigger part of him wanted to do it out of pride. He wanted you to think about this night when you were alone and touching yourself. And he definitely wanted you to think about it, if you tried being with another guy.

Watching you come undone a second time had Auston quickly following. You didn’t let him pull you back into his chest or hold you close before you were up and going to the bathroom.

“Don’t get too comfortable you definitely aren’t staying the night.” You tossed over your shoulder.

Right before closing the door is when you heard his response, “I didn’t plan on it.”

He made it clear that this was casual. You couldn’t lie to yourself and say that him making you turn around didn’t hurt, but you understood it. Returning from the bathroom, you watched as Auston redressed himself as you did the same.

You walked him back through the living room and to your door.

“We don’t tell anyone about this.”

“About what?” His look of fake confusion only lasted a moment before he was smiling and placing a quick kiss on your lips. “Don’t worry, no one will find out.”

“Goodnight Auston .”

“Goodnight, (y/n).”

#famous reader #hockey #maple leafs #nhl blurb #nhl #celebrity reader #toronto maple leafs #justin bieber #hockey imagine #drew house #auston matthews x reader #angst #smut

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separatist-apologist · 2 months

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Separatist-apologist lore beneath the cut

I dropped out of college when I was 19 and when I decided to go back, I had two kids. I was undeclared and I felt old despite still being in my 20s. I had a scholarship which required me to do daytime classes with all of the brand new 18 year olds and I felt wildly out of place. Before that, I'd been staying at home raising my kids while their dad worked and a lot of people thought wanting to return to the workforce was a mistake, so there was this immense pressure to succeed where I'd once failed.

The problem was not knowing what I wanted to do. All I really cared about was history and domestic violence and as far as I knew, there was no good career path that combined those things, and so I signed up for four random classes that had nothing to do with each other. One of them was called Serial Killers in America which was taught by a former police officer. Another was introduction to psychology, taught by a social worker.

I was sitting in the Serial Killer class one morning, way in the back where no one paid me any attention, when the professor (former cop, remember) began telling a story about being called to a house for domestic violence and I remember looking up at her as she said that too often, these things are a "he said, she said," and they're usually both lying.

And it just ignited something angry in my stomach. I was looking for an advisor since I'd been undeclared and I turned that day to the psych professor and asked if she'd fill out my form to be my advisor. As she was, I told her what the other professor said and how much it bothered me and she asked me what I wanted to do. So I told her, and she asked if I'd ever considered social work.

So began six years of perfectionism and the single-minded goal of getting my masters degree and working in the field as a licensed social worker. I remember my first day in orientation at grad school, someone asked if anyone knew where they wanted to be in 5 years. I was the only person who raised their hand. I knew where I wanted to be.

And for the last three years, I got to live that dream. The good, the bad, the horrible- all of it was mine. And today I pack up this office I've worked in for the last three years because its all over. The work was always good and I'm proud of what I've done. I've published papers, I've sat in state-wide commissions, I've talked to legislators, I've presented at conferences and I've trained a new generation of advocates who feel the same passion I do.

It's no secret that people who work in this field are typically survivors themselves. Something about surviving it turns people into advocates, whether they meant to be or not. And often they manage to make it out of the metaphorical burning building, turn around, and decide they need to go back inside to try and get others. The amount of people I've talked to who say, "I want other people to know they're not alone and they can get through this," is numerous. It makes you optimistic, it makes it impossible to ignore the good in humanity even when you're faced with some of the worst people/circumstances you'll ever encounter.

And despite all the petty office politics, a system designed (sometimes purposefully) to make leaving difficult, and state legislators who push back every inch of progress we ever made, I will miss it. The work was always good. I'm proud of the things I did individually for folks, of the amount of times I got to tell someone they did nothing wrong, that they deserved safety and respect.

These three years have been the best and worst of my life, but the work was always good. I will always be in it, will always be standing beside the ghost of my childhood self, offering her a hand and a voice and I think if I accomplished nothing else, at least I did that.

#maybe this is too personal but im feeling so sad today #packing up my office and staring at all these memories #its a new opportunity somewhere bigger and better funded with a higher level of responsibility #but right now it half feels like the death of a dream #separatist-apologist in real life

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tenjikyu · 5 months

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𝘪 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘮𝘢𝘥𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘪𝘯' 𝘺𝘰𝘶 - 𝘬𝘪𝘴𝘴

౨ৎ ⋆｡˚ bonten!mikey x male!rockstar!reader , reader plays guitar in a band , reader dresses more grunge as that’s the bands theme , think nana osaki from nana bc she’s the inspo for the fic , very lighthearted, tryna let poor bonten!mikey catch a break , slight sexual references but nothing actually happens , bonten is a lil ooc bc they all act like family but it’s okay bc it’s bonten.

౨ৎ ⋆｡˚ SLIGHT SPOILERS FOR BONTEN ARC, NOT REALLY BUT WARNING JUST IN CASE. (honestly it’s not spoilers at all bc it’s pretty fanon in comparison to the canon bonten timeline.)

“cmon mikey, get outta the apartment for once in your life that isn’t to go to headquarters!” rindou pouts at his boss.

manjiro really didn’t know what he expected when he decided all the executives should move into a massive penthouse together. sure it was good for his health to be around others and not coop himself up in agony, but he didn’t exactly like the idea of being dragged out whenever his lackeys felt like it.

“not intrested, leave me alone.” manjiro says, attempting to make his way to his bedroom. to go see a band he rarely listened to? who goes to a concert when you don’t give a shit about them to begin with?

sure he’s heard all about the gorgous female lead singer and the hot as fuck guitarist. (Y/N), right? manjiro couldn’t remember nor did he really care to.

“but i bought us all front row tickets to see Black Rose so we could witness how hot Hiroko Asato issss” ran attempted to persuade the stubborn bonten leader.

it wasn’t working.

“i’m looking forward to seeing her outfits up close. from what i’ve heard, she wears pure designer.” kokonoi adds onto the conversation.

“cmon mikey, it’s only one night. if you hate it that much i can drive you back to the penthouse.” kakucho, ever the resolver, bargains with the pouting leader.

“…” manjiro stays silent. ‘it’s just one night i guess, plus it means that i’d have them off my ass for at least a month’ he reasons with himself.

“alright, let’s get going then.” he says, the rest of the executives silently fist bumping the air rn.

the wait to get into the stadium was a bitch, however with a little bit of force, the bonten executives managed to get inside ahead of time.

koko ordered the drinks, kakucho and mochi reserved the spots and the haitani brothers were chatting up some vip ladies in scandalous dresses. meanwhile mikey is . . .

umm . . .

wait.

“oh, hey! are you lost..?”

you do your best to keep cool with the fact that the leader of the biggest mafia syndicate in japan was in your personal changing room.

“the show doesn’t start for another 2 hours, can i help you to your seat? i wouldn’t mind.” you offer, keeping careful of how you talk.

the hotshots of bonten’s identities had been long revealed to the public, however people were too afraid to really report their whereabouts to authorities. many stories of people who had revealed their location that day were swiftly eliminated, even before the news of their position were made public.

and so, knowing that the tatoo on this rather depressed looking man’s neck was a bad sign, you decided to just adhere to whatever he might need.

you were already dressed, the iconic vivienne westwood jewellery hanging from every inch of your body. each member of your band had a significant brand to them, so it wasn’t uncommon for you to be seen decked out in the iconic space themed jewellery. you had always loved the style, and it seemed the mafia boss was equally as intrigued in your designer pieces. you even had their logo imprinted onto your guitar.

“no, i’m okay.” manjiro only replied, his eyes not leaving the necklace that rested gently on your chest.

he didn’t really know why he snuck into the private quarters of the band. perhaps it was to escape his ever-so-annoying underlings?

or perhaps, a little part of him wanted to catch a glimpse of you.

apart from the obvious favourite of the band, the lead singer AS well as the only girl in the band, you were a favourite among listeners.

you had women and men alike screaming your name and begging for skin-on autographs. despite being a dude yourself, you had other guys begging you to sign their tailbone (which you had to politely decline).

manjiro understood why, as you were definitely easy on the eyes. your amazing sense of fashion and your toned body didn’t help.

“uhm.. are you feeling okay? you seem a bit dazed.” you question. in reality, the man was just dead on staring into your soul, scaring the living shit outta you.

“yes, i’m alright.” he finally responds.

. .

. . .

“here, take a seat.” you finally break the silence. why was he here? you didn’t think that a guy like him would have time to sit around some flashy concert. sure, you were a big band but let’s be real, shouldn’t he be at his headquarters shooting peoples heads in?

alas, you knew better then to question it.

and so, you order in some glasses of alcohol and begin chatting. you spoke about your career, how your band came to be and about dreams.

you aren’t entirely sure why you were discussing this sort of shit with a random mafia leader who could probably give less then a shit about you, however he seemed almost enamoured with your conversation.

you felt bad for talking his ear off, especially since you now only had about 45 minutes till showtime and you STILL hadn’t tuned your guitar, however he didn’t seem to care.

everytime you stopped talking, manjiro almost.. glared? at you? as if he was offended that you stopped talking.

unbeknownst to you, manjiro loved listening to you talk. the way you worded things and your voice overall was heavenly to his ears.

the piercings that decorated your skin were appealing to the man. the chain from your ear to you lips especially looked so… attractive to him.

“(Y/N) C’MON, WE’RE ON IN 10” you could hear toru, your drummer, scream out to you.

“SHIT! MY GUITAR” you freaked. HOW did you forget your guitar??

“i’ll come visit after the show.” manjiro says, exiting the room.

“oh, oka-“ before you had the chance to finish your sentence, he vanished.

well, now you couldn’t WAIT for the show to finish!

after the show had ended, you packed up the rest of your gear. your manager had popped in and taken your stage clothes back to the studio before bidding farewell.

as you sat around in a pair of baggy jeans and a t-shirt (inspo - don’t feel like you have to imagine this.) , you paitently waited for the white haired mafia boss to sneak back into your private room.

why were you even waiting? he was probably bullshitting you anyways. why would someone as busy as manjiro sano give a fuck about what you were doi-

“yo.” a cheeky grin graces his face, looking back at you.

note to self : doubt gets you nowhere!

“hey manjiro, enjoy the show?” you ask the man, automatically getting comfortable in his presence. you didn’t exactly know why you felt so relaxed around him, considering his rather infamous reputation, but you just did.

“yeah, you’re certainly the best in your band though. could go solo and still be famous if you wanted.” he replies, automatically heating your face up.

“cmon (Y/N), let’s get going already. i’m tired.” he winged to you in a childlike manner.

“okay.. WAIT—HUH?? where am i going?” you shriek, having no idea that he actually PLANNED to leave this place with you in tow.

“back to my place. duh. i don’t just talk to anybody for fun unless i plan to shoot them in the head an hour later.” he responds in a nonchalant voice.

this boy is gonna be the death of you, literally or figuratively? only time will tell.

regardless of how much you declined the offer, the man ends up dragging you out to the expensive limo that was owned by bonten. not only were you dragged into the car, you were squished in between the boss and 2nd in command of the syndicate, haruchiyo sanzu.

not that you were complaining, the pink haired dude was hot as fuck.

there were many things that occurred that night :

• at 1am, you arrived at their shared headquarters, completely baffled that they all lived together. you decided that you would NOT mention anything that might offend anyone in the room right now.

• at 2am, you were drinking alcohol more pricey then your stage guitar. you weren’t by any means on the poor side, but these men lived a new version of luxury.

• at 3am, you were playing pool with the haitani brothers and sanzu. you lost. miserably.

• at 4am, you were half naked and making out with manjiro sano on his own bed. you didn’t expect the high and mighty manjiro sano to be so submissive in the bedroom.

wait…

“HUH??” WHY WERE YOU IN MANJIRO SANO’S BEDROOM?? WHY WERE YOU IN NOTHING BUT BOXERS?? WHY DID MANJIRO SANO HAVE BITE MARKS ALONG HIS NECK??

“relax dummy, nothing went beyond tongue action.” a mop of platinum hair grumbles beneath the duvet covers.

thank fuck.

‘wait. what time is it?’ you ponder, taking a look at the clock next to the bed. 3:45pm. just how much did you drink to wake up this late?

before you had anymore time to think about it, you feel a thin but strong arm yank you back under the covers,

and come face to face with a pouty mafia leader.

as if on instinct, you pull his head gently into your chest, cradling his head like he’s a porcelain doll. his arms wrap around you as he nuzzled into your body closer, seeking your warmth and comfort.

it doesn’t quite dawn on you that your cuddling a man you literally met yesterday. not because you’re naive or dense, but because it just felt right to be in each others arms.

it’s not until mochi wakes the both of you up for dinner that you reopen your eyes, realising you hadn’t moved since you got dragged down.

it’s an all out war getting manjiro to leave his bed, but when you’re swiftly abducted by the haitani brothers, he’s up and ready, chasing the idiots around claiming they ‘stole his baby.”

well, that’s one way to get a boyfriend!

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genericpuff · 6 months

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All That Glitters is Not Feminism - An Analysis of LO's Brand of "Feminism" and What Remains of its Fanbase (A Prologue)

So I referenced a certain article in a recent reblog/ask response and I just need to talk about it because what the actual fuck-

This has to have been written by either a bot or a hater who's reached peak god tier level at playing the long con sarcasm game because NOTHING about this feels sincere or even factual. Much of it almost has to be read in a mocking tone for it to make any real sense.

It says "Lore Olympus" (literally in quotations) in just about every single paragraph over and over again and every single talking point revolves EXCLUSIVELY around Persephone, which I suppose comes as no surprise considering that seems to be all the comic - and its fanbase - cares about at this point.

I really love (/s) how Persephone's "evolution" is being naive and then 'blossoming' into an independent woman who relies entirely on the rich man who groomed her to solve all her problems.

Also all she's done since becoming Queen of the Underworld is abuse lower class people. That's the stuff feminist dreams are made of <3

While we're talking about the main leads, "poster child" is definitely a word for Hades, I think a more appropriate term would be "literal child". And boy howdy, 'god of consent' sure is a title to give the guy who ripped out a lower class satyr's eyeball and beat him half to death.

This man owns slaves, btw. And both he and his "powerful wife" are equally horrible to lower class people, especially women.

This is hands-down the funniest section of the article and we're only three bullet points in.

Thetis and Persephone have never even so much as spoken one word to each other outside of the courtroom that Thetis technically put her in after plotting against her for an entire season.

Eros is a man. Nothing wrong with that but it comes with the unintentional icky hilarity of implying that because Eros is the gay best friend, that means he's a woman.

They literally don't read this fucking comic-

Everyone always relies on this weird talking point of Demeter not being able to "let Persephone go"... y'all, she just didn't want Persephone to outright move to Olympus, she wanted her to commute. That was it! That was literally the only problem! She wasn't preventing Persephone from pursuing a higher education or telling her she wasn't allowed to work, she literally fucking encouraged it! And with the added later context of Persephone killing a bunch of mortals - and, ironically, the fact that Persephone was assaulted/put in harm's way by TWO SEPARATE MEN in the first two days of her time in Olympus - yeah, I don't blame Demeter for not wanting her daughter to move cold turkey actually LOL

Also hilarious that they claim Rachel has turned "tradition" into "innovation" when the only thing she's managed to do is set back modern feminism in her young adult readers by 80 years and re-establish misogynist brainwashing in her adult ones. Rachel, your fanbase was literally shipping a victim of abuse with her abuser just a few days ago.

oh boy this is uh

this is some cult shit ngl

and the "rewriting the script of Greek mythology" part is VERY concerning knowing what we know about Lore Olympus and who it was written by. This is literally cultural appropriation, full stop, and it exists because Lore Olympus - and works like it, made by people like Rachel - exists.

I can't even commit to the original theory that this was written by a bot because it all feels very pointed and intenetional. This is being written by someone who, at the very least, REALLY sucks at media analysis and writing, because the entire article is just "Lore Olympus, buzzword, Lore Olympus, buzzword, buzzword, Lore Olympus", it's like a white knight incantation for guilty virtue signallers who have zero clue what they're talking about. And at worst, yes, it's appropriation from someone who doesn't mind taking a culture's stories and myths and promoting their erasure by people outside of the culture like Rachel.

And that's it, that's literally the article lmao

*EDIT: There was a section here before addressing the writer of the article from a very opinionated POV that, while isn't unusual for what I do here, did feel necessary to remove after I was contacted by the article writer who addressed the flaws in their original article and is now seeking to correct them with revisions/an article rewrite. So I felt it only fair as a compromise to at least remove that section as it really doesn't have a whole lot to do with this post as a whole and can be removed without entirely ruining the flow of this analysis. If/when that article is rewritten, I'll be revisiting this post and my overall analysis !

And honestly, it's all really telling, because this does accurately reflect the state of the LO fanbase.

Not only do many of the people who defend this comic like it's their job not pick up on the blatant misogynist tones that are going on in its narrative (I can't even call them "undertones" anymore, they're no longer that subtle) but whether or not they even read the comic at all is up for debate with how much stuff they tend to get wrong in their own arguments and justifications. And this is something that's VERY regularly seen in the fanbase discussions, readers will constantly be unaware of things that happened because they skimmed through it at lightning speed just to see if Hades and Persephone kiss and so they can get the top comment on Webtoons so they can be "ahead of the fanbase". It's no wonder that Rachel has gotten used to getting away with retconning things because her fanbase didn't even read what she established the first time.

Rachel's fanbase was literally defending the romance ship of an abuser and his victim on the newest FP episode preview. When that FP episode came out two nights ago and Hera said, point blank, that he didn't love her but abused her, I could only think of that portion of the fanbase who was very audibly simping over Kronos in the IG comment section. Are they actually having their moment of shameful clarity now? Or are they just gonna move the goalposts and pretend that didn't happen?

I don't want to say anything bad about Shelby here because she really seems like she's fighting for her life on this site that she's trying to get off the ground, but a lot of her other articles also come across as very one-note while being peppered with buzzwords that make it seem like what she's talking about is "progressive" when it really isn't. Case in point, Lessons in Chemistry has been commonly criticized for not actually appealing to the demographic that its Mary Sue-ish main character is supposed to represent - women in STEM career fields.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: Lore Olympus is not 'feminism', it's white feminism that is designed to appeal to predominantly heterocis white women who think the solution to misogyny is to willingly submit to it and accept the status quo - that it's "empowering" if the woman is smiling and having all her needs paid for by a man. Sure, I can accept that different women will be looking for different relationship dynamics, some women genuinely are happy being in a relationship where they support their husbands first and foremost. But can that truly be called feminism? Or is the real feminism the choices we make along the way that we should be given the freedom to make?

It says a lot about the folks who tend to regularly prop up LO on a pedestal like this as some "revolution in feminism" despite the contrary after spending more than just 30 seconds skimming the attention-grabbing art, and Shelby is just one of many. She's not the worst of the bunch, though.

That goes to someone else who I want to give proper light to in their own essay. Someone who definitely earned a good stern talking-to this past week and has, thankfully, had consequences dished out to her for her horrible actions towards queer POC writers.

If you know, you know. If you don't, buckle up.

#lore olympus critical #lo critical #anti lore olympus

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sgiandubh · 1 month

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The lonesome fitness girl - really?

This is a story about a nameless female fitness influencer somewhere in the world. She gives the impression of a lonely „ fighter“ in her business and in her life overall.

That is nonsense - she sells her "destiny" very skilfully. I am convinced she is not a lonely woman behind her influencer profile. But that is exactly the impression she wants to convey and she does so publicly with some success. This is her unique selling point right now and whoever manages or advises her has recognised this very well. In other words, a narrative is created very carefully and very purposefully. Sounds somehow familiar?

There are thousands and thousands of fitness influencers, so it is important for everyone in this business to find the niche that generates followers, clicks and in the end it means an income. Simply performing an exercise is not enough. Every click or like on a post or a story generates a few dollars, euros or pounds in revenue.

And an increase in the number of followers by approx. 80,000-100,000 due to a connection to a famous person will raise the income as well. For the record: people like her are so called macro influencer and are a brand. That is a fact - you can find a lot more information about this in various publications by experts in business administration and marketing.

You have to attract attention, something that our nameless fitness girl has done in different ways over the years. Firstly with her partner at the time, later she created the image of a single fitness mum. And at the moment she is promoting the image of a woman who is finding her way back after an illness with a great deal of commitment and determination.

But fitness girl was legitimately afraid of loosing her income if she was not able to work. And her body is her work. This led probably her and her team to the conclusion that she needed "visible support" at this point in order to continue operating her business model during the recovery. And her job is being fitness model. No more and no less.

And right on time, a famous actor with a closeness to fitness programmes or probably rather his team came in. Now she seems to get into contact with his presumably more influential and well-connected fitness circles. And, purely by chance, she is building up an online fitness course. All on her own and while she looks after the rest of her business(es?) - and cares for her family. Hopefully she gets enough sleep? Probably not, which is hardly surprising considering her workload with all her duties and work obligations towards her partners. Fortunately, just like in fairy tales, there is a wonderful magic wand for this - Instagram filter.

The story really is getting better and better...

Add some well-planned (sometimes "almost") encounters at various competition venues between the two main characters.

The fitness girl, her business and her story truly seem impressive? Only if you believe in fairy tales.

Too many coincidences at once, it looks like a well established business deal, too scripted? No - just keep it simple to feed the narrative of the "lonely fitness girl"! Or is she "The girl who never sleeps"? Nobody knows for sure.

But she is most likely not the woman she pretends to be...

Dear Lonesome Fitness Girl Anon,

In an ocean of infantile, mendacious, shite-stirring Anons, your submission is absolutely STELLAR!

Whoever you are, I can tell by the ease of your logical deductions that you mean serious business and you are not easy to fool, either. Just what we happen to love, in this particular corner of this fandom.

I am totally thrilled to share with all of us this rare gem, Anon. Especially today.

You are more than welcome to hit this page anytime. It takes a pro to know a pro. Consider me a friend, Anon: you have instantly become one to me, and I bet not only to me.

Everyone, a round of applause for our unexpected guest!

#anon #fandom #shitshow #London Hyrox 2024

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sturnioloshacker · 8 months

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balancing act - a chris sturniolo short

a/n: requested by anon; lowercase intended

summary: chris struggles to juggle his responsibilities and reader comforts him and reassures him that everything will work

chris had always been the reliable one, the guy who never let anyone down. he prided himself on juggling his responsibilities, from filming car videos with his two older brothers to making sure he has enough merch for his clothing brand to being there for his friends and family when they need it the most. but recently, the weight of it all had started to crush him.

after a day of filming for the podcast, chris slumped into his bed, making his girlfriend, y/n, turn around from where she was seated on the bathroom sink getting ready for bed. joining him in bed, y/n noticed the exhaustion etched across his face. his shoulders slumped, and he seemed on the verge of tears. she knew something was bothering him, and she couldn't stand to see him this way.

“sweetheart, you've been so distant lately. is everything okay?" she asked, her voice filled with concern.

it’s true. chris had been so disconnected from reality lately that he frequently missed calls from his manager, kept zoning out when being spoken to and was always falling asleep during the day which he never did. so disconnected from reality that he completely forgot about his own girlfriend. turning to face the girl he adored so much, chris sighed deeply, his eyes welling up.

“i just... i don't know, baby. i’m trying to keep up with everything, but i’m overwhelmed. the car video topics are not it, i’m not liking the new designs for fresh love, mum and dad are on the other side of the country and i don’t know how much more i can possibly handle. i don't want to let anyone down, but i’m starting to feel like i’m falling apart."

y/n moved closer to him, wrapping her arms around him in a comforting embrace.

“it's okay to feel overwhelmed sometimes, my love. you don't have to be everyone's superhero all the time. you're human, and it's alright to ask for help or take a break when you need it."

chris leaned into her, the warmth of her embrace providing a glimmer of solace.

“but i’m scared of disappointing people, especially you."

she gently lifted his chin to look into his eyes.

“you will never disappoint me, christopher. you're the most caring and selfless person i know, but you also need to care for yourself. we're a team, and together, we can handle anything that comes our way. you don't have to bear the weight of the world alone."

tears welled up in chris’s eyes as he realised the depth of y/n’s understanding and support. he hugged her tightly, grateful for her presence in his life. with her by his side, he knew he could find a way to navigate the challenges and responsibilities that had been overwhelming him. he wasn't alone, and together, they would face whatever came their way, knowing that everything would indeed be okay.

a/n: it's okay to take breaks and remove yourself from the stress of whatever is happening in your life. it's so important to take care of yourself as well as your mental health and wellbeing. i've been there, done that. please don't ever feel like you're disappointing anyone by taking a break! you're doing what's best for you and people will understand. i love you all so much, please take care of yourselves for me 🧡

#chris sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #chris sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo triplets fanfic #chris sturniolo imagine #sturniolo triplets imagine #chris sturniolo fluff #chris sturniolo x reader

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brujahinaskirt · 10 months

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You know, when it really comes down to it, the main thing that tears me to pieces about Arthur & John is encapsulated so nicely in the trope of the Lonesome Cowboy.

RDR2's storytelling is particularly masterful as it shows us that everyone is the mythic Lonesome Cowboy... but at the same time, I believe it manages to quietly suggest there is one true Lonesome Cowboy of the series.

And it ain't Arthur Morgan.

DEEPLY overwritten explanation below!

On the surface, Arthur is clearly set up by RDR2 to be our Lonesome Cowboy. He even sings the song. But is he really? Really, truly? Or is Arthur's brand of lonesomeness a clever model to help us, through comparison and contrast, begin to notice and understand another, deeper type of loneliness?

Arthur thinks he's unlovable and alone because he lacks one specific type of love, romantic domesticity, which he has dreamed throughout his life and consistently been denied. But though his pain is genuine, the idea that Arthur is alone and unloved is almost laughable. R* shows us every single game day that Arthur is surrounded by people who love him, live with him, and depend upon him.

But that's the great irony of the RDR Lonesome Cowboy, right? Arthur feels lonely and believes he is alone because he is a "bad man" and nonbeliever whom "no one will have" (not even God, and he remains true to his atheism through the bitter end [and thank god for that honestly because the last thing I needed was a Come to Jesus cowboy game...]).

But the inverse is true, and his depression is lying to him; Arthur is almost never alone and pretty much everyone in his family unit actively enjoys his company and wants him around. And yes, many of these people are damaged and have trouble communicating that (though fewer than you'd think). And no, it isn't the same as getting married to one person and raising a family with them for the rest of your life. But lonesome? As in, emotionally and/or physically alone?

Nah! Come on, man! Not even close.

Arthur is more than just loved and needed: he's actually understood by those he chooses to let in, because Arthur is definitely capable of telling his closest confidants how he feels and what is lurking in his heart. We see him do this many times. Sometimes with surprising ease and honesty.

When Arthur is physically alone in RDR2, he's wandering at the player's command, and if he wanders for too long, he's eventually retrieved & lambasted by the people at camp who quite openly/forcefully tell him they missed him and worried about him. Even Low Honor Arthur is a popular man at camp, in his own way, the support beam of his strange family (though LH Arthur is more likely to selectively deny that support, or to provide that support with the caveat of verbal cruelty).

A messy run-down of some obvious examples to illustrate my point:

Despite Dutch's deterioration and manipulations, Dutch and Hosea openly dote on him and relish telling embarrassing family stories about their Big Man Old Guard son to each other. Hosea especially frets about and tries to care for Arthur, mostly physically but sometimes emotionally as well. Susan can be abrasive at best, but she also clearly favors Arthur, thinks often about his well-being, and is one of the primary worriers when he's away from camp for too long.

Abigail and Jack completely rely on Arthur for a significant period of their lives, and though Abigail struggles greatly with showing affection & vulnerability, I would argue her primary and most extraordinary mode of care and affection for Arthur is allowing him to help her raise her son. Sure, she needs the help... but Arthur needs the nuclear family experience of being heavily relied on, too, and Abigail makes it clear she understands that about him better than anybody else. (I'd go on to argue that being relied on in a family way is essential for Arthur's self-esteem and is how he can continue to function despite the massive clash between his true nature and his violent lifestyle, for which he constantly berates himself. But that's neither here nor there...)

The Girls (Tilly, Mary-Beth, Karen) actively worry about his mental health and invite him to share his burdens with them, comfort him (each in their own unique way), play games, dance, etc. They do this for Arthur we don't see them do for anyone else in camp (apart from each other, which leads me to believe Arthur is sort of an honorary member of The Girls, though I won't get too much into that here).

Sadie: "Aside from my [BELOVED HUSBAND AND SOUL MATE] Jake, you're the best man I've known."

Though Arthur seems more likely to trust & befriend women/non-masc men, he has masc men friends & confidants too, and most of the men at camp seem to rank Arthur as somehow more reliable than other members. Charles very obviously loves Arthur & vice versa to the point where I tried to pick one demonstrative example and couldn't figure out where to begin. Uncle is a pain in Arthur's ass, but when shit hits the fan, he knows (and tells him) that Arthur is the best man of them all. Lenny, while young, enjoys Arthur's company (though I would argue Arthur feels more strongly about Lenny than the inverse due to Arthur's tendency to protectively fuss over young people). Hell, Sean constantly tells Arthur, word for word, "I love ya, Arthur Morgan!!! I really do!!! I love ya!!!!" He's being goofy, but he's not joking! He said that!

And that's just a surface-level sampling of gang members. These threads run much, much deeper and we could spend essays analyzing each one, but my god this has gone on too long already.

One could argue that Arthur's story aloneness is at the moment of his death, but I can't quite agree. With Save John + High Honor Arthur path especially, I would argue Arthur has never been less emotionally (even spiritually) alone than when he chose to change the very nature of his death from a random consequence of his hard life to an act of love that gives his surviving core family (John, Abigail, Jack) a chance at happiness. In less peaceful endgame scenarios, Arthur might not actually die alone, or even have time to linger on his approaching departure from the world.

So I posit that Arthur is not, was never the Lonesome Cowboy. Arthur is loved as much as he loves others.

I posit that the true Lonesome Cowboy of RDR is John.

John Marston, who on the surface has everything Arthur ever wanted... but who, due to the nature of his heart and what he's seen, cannot bring himself to fully open up in a way that enables him to be truly understood and embraced by anyone, not even the person he comes to love most in the world (Abigail). There's a reason the epilogue feels so shocking and lonely, and while I do think Rockstar could have done a better job on the transitional cinematics from playing as Arthur to playing as John, that crushing loneliness and sense of discomfort and incompleteness is vital.

It feels awful. It feels like we just lost a limb and were thrown back into everyday life with no fanfare, no true honorable sendoff, no closure, no greater understanding of the world, no peace or contentment. And it feels that way because that discordant, jarring dis-allowance of grief is the ONLY mechanism that helps us feel how John must feel now. Because unlike Arthur, John cannot express or unfold or understand his own pain and loneliness. Not to us, the player, and not even to himself. He never grieves.

Of course, when Sadie and Micah drift back into his life, John snaps. He's never grieved! He's been emotionally alone through all of that, even when he has his family and friends, because he can't open up and let them in! He risks destroying his family in a way that would have undoubtedly caused Arthur extreme horror and anger because John's family is not and has never been a cure for John's loneliness, even though John truly loves them more than anything at the end.

John can't express it, so it's these lyrics themselves that serve as the fount of his grief: I ain't got no brother. No wonder Abigail has her own quiet epilogue rendition of this song (and she, too, is a profoundly Lonesome Cowboy in her way, just like Karen, Hosea, Javier, Jack, etc....). Once Arthur is gone from the world, so too is the only person who knew this deeply damaged kid well enough from his wild childhood to really even hope to see into John's heart.

tl;dr: Arthur thinks he's the legendary Lonesome Cowboy, but he's not. He's just lonely, not alone. In reality, the character who is fundamentally alone, truly lonesome, has always been John.

#rdr2 #red dead redemption #john marston #arthur morgan #redmeta #long long long long post

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hippolotamus · 29 days

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Inspiration Saturday 🪩

Tagged by the delightful @thekristen999 @daffi-990 @lemonzestywrites @bidisasterevankinard @wikiangela

@theotherbuckley for Fuck it Friday. Thank you darlin’s (tagging you back for today) mwah! 💖

Made a lil moodboard for today's snippet. I'm not in love with all the words but that's what editing is for. So, here's Buck visiting Eddie's workplace for the first time. Surprise (because I don't think I've mentioned this before???) Eddie's not a firefighter in this either. He's a mechanic who works with a bunch of homophobic jerks. But also with Hen! Buck knows Eddie isn't out to most people so this is an... enlightening moment for him. Some of it's under the cut to save your dash. masterlist of posts here and no I'm not writing this remotely in order

“Oh, thank fuck,” he mumbles to himself when he pulls the door open and is greeted with a cool blast of air conditioning.

Looking around the interior, he thinks it could pass for a museum. A snapshot in time, forever preserved exactly as it was. Gold framed articles about the 1973 grand re-opening hang on the wood-paneled walls alongside prints of hot rods and muscle cars. There are vintage metal signs mixed in for Shell, Texaco, Gulf, and some other brands he’s never heard of.

“Do you have an appointment?” A gravelly voice asks from behind him.

Buck jerks around to the desk where a middle aged woman with auburn hair and green gray eyes glares at him with a mix of boredom and curiosity. Or maybe suspicion? He can't quite tell.

Her bronzed skin is littered with freckles and screams that she’s spent too much time outside with no sunscreen or other protection. A name plate, half hidden under papers and key rings, identifies her as Estelle. He’s heard a few stories about her from Eddie, but he’s not sure any of them did her intimidating demeanor justice.

“Uh, no?” He answers, not sure why it comes out as a question other than he’s not entirely convinced the five foot something couldn’t somehow manage to hurt him.

It must take every ounce of strength to conceal the whole body sigh she wants to make as she looks down, licks her fingertip and begins flipping through a giant paper scheduling book. “If you don’t have an appointment I can maybe get you in next Thursday. Depending on what you need.”

“Actually, uh, I don’t need anything.” Estelle glances up, mouth slightly parted and eyes narrowed as if she’s about to ask what he’s doing standing in her lobby. He quickly adds, “Well, what I mean is, my car doesn’t need anything. I’m here to see Eddie? Uh, Eddie Diaz.”

She nods with something like understanding. At least he hopes that’s what it is as she picks up the phone receiver and punches in a few numbers.

“Yeah, yeah, I know. Hey, is Diaz around? Someone here asking about him.”

“No, it’s not the cops! What’s the matter with you? I don’t know. Just some guy here looking for Eddie.”

Estelle huffs an exasperated sigh and looks toward the ceiling like it’ll give her strength. “Jay, I don’t have time for twenty questions and, quite frankly, I don’t care.”

“About time you quit screwin’ around. Send him out.” She hangs up the receiver and mutters something about not caring that he’s a relative.

“He’ll be a few minutes. Take a seat.” She gestures to a line of metal chairs with sticky looking vinyl cushions without so much as glancing in Buck’s direction.

He momentarily gets excited when he spots a gumball machine in the corner until he realizes it would require actual coins that he definitely doesn’t have. And he’s not about to ask Estelle if she’s got change for a twenty just so he can satisfy his sweet tooth.

“Buck?” Eddie appears from a side door, wiping his hands on a rag. His hair is sweaty and mussed, likely from pushing it out of his face. His gorgeous, kissable face that Buck very much wants to kiss even more right now despite the streaks and smudges of god knows what decorating it. The corner of Eddie’s mouth twitches like he knows what Buck is thinking, but he clears his throat and schools it just as quickly when Estelle grunts, reminding them they’re at his workplace.

“Uh, Buck. Hi. What can I do for you?” Eddie tilts his chin in the direction of the parking lot. “Everything okay with the jeep?”

“Hi,” Buck answers, a little too breathy for their current situation. He can’t seem to help himself. Eddie’s always cleaned up when they meet, whether it’s at the club, a date out somewhere or an evening in. He’s never seen him marked up from his job, in his grimy army green coveralls.

“Uh, yeah. Jeep’s fine. Just, you know, was nearby and thought I’d stop in.” Buck tracks the movement as Eddie’s tongue darts out, wetting his lips, before sneaking him a flirty, amused smirk.

“Glad you did.” Eddie chances a look at Estelle who still has her head down, shuffling some papers that probably don’t need it. He takes a step closer and lowers his voice. “I haven’t taken my lunch yet. Give me five and we can get out of here?”

Buck nods, not knowing how to respond without giving anything away.

Eddie puts more distance between them again, sticking his hand out. Buck takes it, thrown by the familiarity of his boyfriend mixed with the very conventional, socially acceptable handshake. “Great to see you again, Buck. Check that place on Viscount Boulevard. I think you’ll find what you’re looking for.”

“Uh, yeah. Thanks,” Buck answers, reluctantly letting their palms slide apart. But he gets it. Eddie’s coworkers are all a bunch of ignorant, homophobic assholes. Well, except for Hen apparently. Regardless, Eddie can’t be risking his job and livelihood when he has Chris to think about. “I’ll go check it out. You said it’s about... ten minutes from here?”

“About that, yeah. Maybe fifteen.”

A warm, fluttering feeling washes over him as Eddie winks and smiles, seeming pleased that Buck caught on to his little game. He has to force himself to turn around and leave instead of watching his boyfriend walk away.

“Have a nice day,” Estelle says as he opens the door, setting off a chime. It’s enough to snap him out of his haze, offering a weak ‘you too’ as he hurries back to his jeep.

np tagging @actuallyitsellie @epicbuddieficrecs @loveyouanyway @a-noble-dragon @tizniz

@mountedeverest @fortheloveofbuddie @weewootruck @saybiwithme @shipperqueen6

@ramonaflow @taketheplanspinitsideways @spotsandsocks @dangerpronebuddie @stereopticons

@kitteneddiediaz @mrs-f-darcy @drowsy-quill @your-catfish-friend @filet-o-feelings

@underwaterninja13 @lizzie-bennetdarcy @rainbow-nerdss @steadfastsaturnsrings @queenmabcreates

@inell @jesuisici33 @rmd-writes @shortsighted-owl @queerbuckleys

@bi-buckrights @elvensorceress @bucksbiawakening @giddyupbuck @hoodie-buck

@indestructibleheart @ladydorian05 @monsterrae1 @statueinthestone @slightlyobsessedwitheverything

@the-likesofus @thewolvesof1998 @watchyourbuck @welcometololaland @wildlife4life and anyone else who wants to 😘

#more under the cut because… long #since i'm pissed at eddie rn #i wanted to write the angst #but then my brain wouldn't let me before i set a few things up #blargh #just for kicks i imagine Estelle sounds like Roz from monsters inc #hippo writes #buddie wip #inspiration saturday #fic: watch my shattered edges glisten #mechanic!eddie

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sunkissed-zegras · 9 months

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✮ 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐞, 𝐢 𝐬𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐞. 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐞, 𝐢'𝐥𝐥 𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮 | prologue jump then fall au

au masterlist! masterlist!

♡ ─ word count | 1.7k

♡ ─ summary | adam was resisting the idea of hiring a nanny despite luca's insistence that paloma needed one. they met with a potential nanny who had good credentials and reviews. they decided that cece may be the right person to care for paloma, even if it would take time for adam to fully trust her.

♡ ─ warnings | mention of a troubled past, the hard time opening up, nothing else really!

♡ ─ taglist | TBD! let me know if you want to be in the JUMP THEN FALL AU!

♡ ─ ev's notes | oh my gosh, i haven't been this excited for an AU in a while. i have been so de-motivated for so long and i'm so happy that i'm finally back on my grind LMAO!! but on another note, thank you v @drysdalesv for helping me with this au, i love you and you're so amazing and creative HEHHEHEH. anyway, enjoy!!!

"Adam, come on." Luca sighed as he leaned his head back in annoyance. "She's two, she can't survive on her own and you can't take her to every practice, or game."

Adam sat on the couch of his brand-new apartment as he listened to his brother trying to convince him to get him a nanny. He's been trying ever since the move and he understood why but he wasn't sure he was ready. "People are weird these days, Luca, I'm not gonna just hire someone off the street-"

"Adam, there are websites, background checks and so much more. You're not gonna hire some random person to take of her, I get it, but what do you expect?"

Adam, torn between his protective instincts and the practicality of the situation, sighed. "I know, Luca, I just… I've never been comfortable with the idea of strangers around Paloma. She's my everything."

Luca leaned forward, his voice gentle but firm. "Look, I get it, man. But we can't do this alone. You've got a career to focus on, and I've got my own life to manage, I can't be driving up here everyday and mom and dad have their work. We both love her, but we can't be with her 24/7."

Adam ran a hand through his hair, feeling the weight of responsibility settling on his shoulders. He knew Luca was right, Paloma was his top priority, and his hockey career demanded a lot of his time. It was his dream but he had to make sacrifices sometimes.

"I know, I know. It's just… What if something happens? What if the nanny isn't right for her?" He's heard the stories of those crazy nannies who abuse their power and doesn't even know what he'd do if anything like that happened to Paloma.

Luca put a reassuring hand on his brother's shoulder. "We'll find someone who's perfect for her, someone we can trust. And we'll be there to oversee everything. Paloma deserves a chance to socialize, learn, and grow."

Adam nodded, the corners of his lips lifting slightly as he scoffed playfully. "You always know how to talk me into things, Luca."

Luca grinned happily. "That's what brothers are for, right?"

Adam glanced at his draft photo on the wall, picture of him holding Paloma in his arms, both of them wearing matching smiles on the second best day of his life. It was a simple reminder that Paloma's happiness and well-being were his top priorities. And the more he thought about it he realized that maybe, just maybe, he could find someone who would fit perfectly into their little family.

"Alright, Luca. Let's start looking for a nanny."

──

The air was warm and the scent of flowers filled the outside area of the Cafe Adam had chosen to meet with the new nanny one of his new teammates had told him about. She was around his age, maybe a bit younger, and was currently a student at Ohio State. She seemed like an ideal fit, with a schedule that matched Adam's needs—available Monday through Saturday from 9 am to 2 pm, perfect for morning practices. She also had many positive reviews from previous employers.

Seated outside, Luca observed his brother, who repeatedly checked his phone. Luca couldn't help but let out a soft sigh. "What?"

"She's late," Adam replied, his anxiety evident. He was usually laid back but right now, Luca could tell he was nervous.

"Since when do you care about punctuality? And it's rush hour, she's probably stuck in traffic." Luca replied as he tried to calm the boy down. She was the fifth nanny they'd met with in the span of a few weeks and he still hasn't found a match. Practice was going to start next week and this girl just had to be the right fit or he wouldn't know what else to do.

Adam tried to calm his nerves, playing with his keychain to try and calm his nerves. "Yeah, you're probably right. I just want this to work out, you know? Paloma deserves the best."

With an encouraging smile, Luca affirmed, "And she'll get it, Adam. We'll find the perfect fit for her, someone who'll love her like we do."

Adam nodded, appreciating his brother's reassuring words. He knew Luca was right; they would eventually find the perfect caregiver for Paloma, someone who would care for her as if she were their own.

Just as Adam was about to voice his concerns about the potential nanny's tardiness again, the cafe's entrance door chimed, and a young woman stepped inside. She scanned the outdoor seating area, her gaze locking onto the table where Adam and Luca sat. With a friendly smile, she approached them, her demeanor friendly and sweet.

She was pretty; that was the first thing Adam thought as he looked at her. She had a backpack on and it was obvious she had just come from a lecture, she looked the tiniest bit of tired but Adam thought that made her somewhat more attractive.

"Adam, Luca?" she inquired, her voice warm and welcoming. "I'm so sorry for being a little late, I got stuck in traffic on the way here."

Adam couldn't deny that Cece had a certain charm about her, and he appreciated her honesty. "No worries, Cece," he replied, offering her a warm smile. "It's nice to meet you. I'm Adam, and this is my brother, Luca."

Luca also greeted her with a friendly nod and smile. "Good to meet you, Cece."

Cece settled into the chair across from them, her backpack placed beside her. She seemed at ease, and her friendly demeanor put Adam's initial concerns to rest. It was important that the person they chose to care for Paloma was not only qualified but also someone she could feel comfortable around. The fact that Cece had come straight from a lecture also signaled to Adam that she was hardworking, which he appreciated.

"So, you go to Ohio State?" Luca mumbled playfully as he looked down at his Michigan sweatshirt. Cece let out a soft laugh at that and nodded.

"Yup, buckeye through and through." Cece faked a southern accent which made them both let out a soft chuckle, "Well not really. My entire family has went to Michigan, I'm the first to break the tradition."

As the conversation flowed, Adam couldn't help but steer it towards the topic that mattered most to him—Paloma. He had to know if Cece could connect with his daughter. With a warm smile, he began, "So, Cece, have you worked with toddlers before?"

Cece nodded, "Yeah I have. I worked with a toddler last year but they moved. I also have a little brother and some nieces and nephews.” A smile engulfed her face as she mentioned her family and Adam couldn’t help but be drawn to her genuine warmth.

"That's wonderful," Adam replied, his own smile growing. "Family means everything to us, and Paloma is like our little princess."

Luca chimed in, "She's a sweet kid, but she's been through a lot. We want to make sure she's comfortable with whoever takes care of her." Adam couldn’t help but stiffen at the mention of their hardships. He looked down at the table.

Cece sensed the change in the atmosphere as soon as Luca mentioned Paloma's hardships. She couldn’t help but wonder exactly what those were but she wasn’t going to ask anytime soon, it was obvious the wound was still fresh.

"I understand," she said softly, her voice filled with empathy. "Paloma's comfort and happiness will be my top priorities. I'll do my best to create a safe and loving environment for her, so she can heal and thrive."

Adam, still struggling with the memories of the past year, nodded slowly. It was difficult for him to open up about their challenging journey and even Luca still didn’t know the entire story with him and his ex.

Luca placed a reassuring hand on Adam's shoulder, silently letting him know that they were in this together, and that Cece might just be the right person to help them move forward as a family.

Adam leaned forward, "That's what we want, someone who can give her love and security. She's the most important thing in my life." Cece could tell how much Adam loves Paloma and she admired that. Her gaze softened as he spoke, it was so heartwarming seeing a father so involved with his daughter.

Cece met Adam's gaze with sincerity. "I promise you, Adam, Luca, I'll put my heart into making sure Paloma feels loved and safe."

In that moment, as they discussed their shared commitment to Paloma's well-being, Adam felt a sense of hope he hadn't felt in a long time. Cece's warm and genuine personality made him believe that they might have found the perfect person to care for his daughter. Sure, it’d take a while for her to fully gain his trust, (if ever), but he had hope for them.

As their conversation came to a close, Cece, still smiling warmly, glanced at her phone. "I hate to cut it short, but I have to head to my next class soon. Is there anything else you'd like to ask or talk about before I have to leave?"

Adam exchanged a quick look with Luca, silently before nodding. With a smile, he replied, "No, Cece, I think we're good. Thank you for coming to meet with us, and for your willingness to be a part of Paloma's life."

Cece's smile widened, and she stood up, picking up her backpack. "It was my pleasure, Adam. I'm really looking forward to getting to know her better.”

As Cece left the cafe, Luca turned to Adam with a grin. "I think we found our nanny, Adam."

Adam chuckled, a weight lifted off his shoulders. "Yeah, I think so too. She’s good.”

“That’s all you’re gonna say? She’s perfect, Adam.” He chuckled as he picked up the water and took a sip. “And she’s just your type.”

Adam rolled his eyes and groaned at Luca’s insinuation as he laughed. He wasn’t wrong, she is exactly his type and not just on paper, she was sweet and caring and- Adam stopped himself before he got too ahead of himself. “Remember what we both said not even two weeks ago?”

“No girls,” they said in unison and Luca let out a dramatic sigh. They had to focus on family and hockey, their main priorities before getting into any serious relationships. It was mostly Adam, though - after what happened with his ex he felt as if he couldn’t even think about relationships. Hockey and his family, more importantly Paloma, were his top priorities and love was simply a distraction. Right now, at least.

-> make sure to check out my navigation or masterlist if you enjoyed! any interaction is greatly appreciated! <-

thank you for reading all the way through, as always ♡

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smoooothoperator · 3 months

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untouchable

17: Chanson Triste

Lando Norris x OC (Violet Sinclair)

same group friend, unrequited love, acquittances to lovers, ski trip, love triangle, life as lovers

Warnings: death, cemetery, angst

a/n: I'm back!!!! God, you guys have no idea how much I missed Violet and Lando, I was so excited while writing this chapter. I hope everyone is doing amazing, having good days. I came from a really really needed break and from a trip I was so excited to make, and with a lot of ideas for this story. But here you have some bad news... I can see the end of this story! Is not close yet, some things have to happen, but that means too that THE chapter is coming :)

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If you want to be tagged don't forget to message me!

Every way of feedback is very welcomed

I knew I was going to be in the mouth of everyone. Dating him, a well known driver in Europe that drives for the second most famous team of the world, would mean that my social media would be full of notifications, of people sending requests of following, of attempts of messages. I knew that once we landed back in London, people would recognize us and follow us.

But I have to love the present. I have to keep being who I am, I can't show a weakness because they would be attacking it immediately. If I want to be with Lando, I have to fight against the odds to make them see that I don't care what people say about me.

“I don't want to leave tomorrow…” I sighed, laying on the bed and looking through the window, observing the pyramids.

“Me neither” I heard him sigh, laying on his side and kissing my arm. “Maybe we can stay some more days…”

“You know we can't” I sighed looking at him, smiling weakly. “My worry is growing and I need to see Eloise. I'm really worried, she's not answering my texts or calls…”

“Did you call her parents too?” he smiled weakly, rubbing my back softly.

“They decline my calls…” I whisper, sadly. “I just… What if she's really mad at me because I chose to stay with you instead of talking with her? I mean, I did explain to her why I did that, what happened… But she didn't answer, just left me on read”

“It will be okay, love” Lando sighed, kissing my shoulder. “You want me to go with you? So we can talk with her and explain to her…”

“I don't know, I think I want to do it alone” I smiled weakly. “We have to talk, many things have happened since last time I saw her and I just want to have some time alone with her”

“I understand” he nodded, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me to his chest.

“You are the best” I smiled, kissing his lips softly, cupping his jaw with my hand. “You know, I think we broke the internet some days ago”

“Oh, yeah. I know” he laughed, making me smile when I felt his chest move with his laugh. “My manager texted me saying that people just went crazy, kinda”

“I just… I don't want to be like those girlfriends that are models and influencers” I said. “I mean, they are perfect. Every time I talked with some of them I felt like an outlander, kinda. They just dressed with important brands like Gucci, Dior, Tommy Hilfiger… and the most expensive clothing I have is a dress I bought for a gala in the museum, and it's nothing compared to what they wore”

“I know you are not like them, Violet” he said, kissing my head. “And that's what I love about you. You are natural, careless. You are like a breath of fresh air for me, really. You keep my feet in the ground”

“That's cute” I smile looking up at him. “I just… I guess I want to be worth it? Yesterday I read some of the comments of the posts and they kept repeating that finally there's a girlfriend that is not famous. Like, I'm normal, I guess. Not an influencer, not an athlete, not a model”

“And that's perfect, really” he smiled.

“But that made them think that I want you for your money” I smiled weakly. “I mean, if they say that, I can just take a screenshot of my bank account and show the money I have. But that's not what I was saying…”

“I just imagined you posting on Instagram that screenshot with a caption like… I'm not poor, I have a job. Go mind your own business” he interrupted me laughing, making me laugh too.

“You and I both know that I'm capable of doing that” I laugh. “But what I was saying! Why are they so determined to say that every girlfriend is with their partner just because of money and fame? Why can't they think that it is because of something else, like love?”

“Because… I don't know” he sighed, brushing my hair with his fingers. “I guess they want drama, gossip. They think that a love story is not dramatic or important for a driver. They just want to make and believe their own narrative and take things out of context”

“That kinda sucks” I whisper.

“It does, yeah…” he sighed. “But I don't care about what they think. I only care that after every race I'll have someone waiting for me. I made many mistakes before, like letting them get in my mind and make me push away people that cared for me. I won't make the same mistake again, I will fight for us”

“I love you, Lando” I smiled, hugging him tight.

“Tomorrow I will take you to a place before we leave” he said. “So I want you to take that white dress you bought the other day at the market”

“Are you going to propose?” I laughed. “Isn't that a little soon? I don't know, wait for next year maybe. We have been dating for a week!”

“No, silly!” he laughed. “But I'll keep that in mind”

“Idiot” I laughed softly.

He just held me, both of us watching the pyramids before falling asleep in each other's arms.

The next morning, after I woke up I grabbed my phone, checking if I had any answer from Eloise. But like the last few days, I didn't have messages from her.

“I'm sure she's fine, Violet” I heard Landon whisper, kissing my shoulder.

“It's just… I feel something is wrong. We never have been this long without talking. I just want her to send me whatever…” I whispered.

I heard Lando sigh and wrapping his arms around me tightly, making me take a deep breath and close my eyes, getting comfortable in his arms.

The next morning he woke me up, peppering soft kisses all over my shoulders and neck, rubbing his hand over my back in soft circles. His smile was the first thing I saw when I opened my eyes, making me answer him the same way.

“Good morning, beautiful” he whispered, making me chuckle softly and hide my face on his bare chest, pressing a soft kiss on his skin. “Ready to do one last visit?”

“Mhm” I nodded, wrapping my arm around him.

We just got up and while the room service came with our breakfast, we put out clothes back in the suitcases, making sure they were ready and sent to the reception so we don't have to come back before leaving.

I looked at the white dress, smiling. I have no idea what he wants to do, where are we going now. But somehow I was excited about it, I was excited because I saw him excited about being in this place. I'm excited because he was so interested in things I like. He looked at me with a smile while he nodded, paying attention to everything I explained to him. And it made me fall even more for him, if that was possible.

“You ready?” he smiled, watching how I tied my hair on a braid after hanging my bag on my shoulder. “Let's go”

I laugh softly, walking out with him and going to the main door of the hotel. A van was waiting for us, ready to take us to the place he planned to go. He held my hand all the time, rubbing soft circles on my knuckles.

“Where are we going?” I asked him, resting my head on his shoulder.

“You'll see” he whispered. “Just be patient, we are close”

I laugh softly and nod, looking out of the window and enjoying the land that surrounded us. After a few minutes, the car stopped.

“Let's go” he smiled, opening the door and getting out of the car before me.

I smiled at him, holding his hand as he helped me get out of the van. I looked around surprised, recognizing this place.

“No you didn't” I laughed softly.

“Oh yeah” he smirked, hiding my hand tightly and walking with me. “You know what this temple means?”

“It's Hathor’s temple” I nodded, looking around and smiling. “Egyptian goddess of the sky, music, joy, dance and love”

“And you told me that she was associated with Isis, right?” he said, wrapping his arm around me. “The goddess of the loyalty and the maternal love”

“Mhm” I nodded.

“Well, I want to make a promise, in front of her” he said, holding my hand and stopping right in front of one of the many statues of the goddess.

“Lando” I laughed softly, watching how he grabbed something from the pocket of his jeans, making me swallow the lump and laugh nervously.

“I want to promise you that I will treat you how you deserve to be treated. I promise that I will never hurt you or touch you when you don't want to. I promise that I will never make you cry. I promise that I will be only thinking about you, when I wake up, during the day and at night. I promise to cherish you and make you happy and fight whoever dares to make you feel sad”

“Lando…” I smiled softly, feeling my eyes getting wet when I saw him open his hand, showing me a silver ring with two small rocks placed next to the other.

“This is my promise. I'll give you this ring to seal my promise of loving you forever. You owe my heart since the day I first saw you” he said while he put the ring on my ring finger. “This ring has our birthstones, together. Because I really think that we were born to be together, that you are my soulmate, Violet. And now that I found you I will never let you go. I won't leave you”

His words sank in my heart, filling my chest with a warm flame he only knows how to turn on. His touch is delicate, how he holds my hand while I admire the beautiful ring with both stones, topaz and and tanzanite, together.

“Idiot, you are going to make me cry and you just promised me that you won't make me do it” I laughed softly, wiping the little tears of joy that were running down my cheeks.

“Come here” he laughed, wrapping his arms around me, holding me close to him, heart by heart.

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mclaren it was so nice having you during the testings and the launch with us!

violetsinclair you won't get rid of me easily

Driving through the road that takes me to my childhood village was bittersweet. The first year I was away for my studies I was excited to come back and finally be on my childhood bed with my family again, but as years went by, that feeling started to disappear and it turned more into an obligation rather than something I used to do for pleasure.

Once my life was in order after coming back from the trip with Lando and both of us got used to living around the other, I took some days off from work and forced myself to grab my car and drive home.

The past few days I tried to call Eloise again, as well as her family. But again, none of them answered. She only has her parents, her family is not as big as mine with grandparents that are still alive, uncles and aunts and cousins. That's why she always loved to spend time at my house during holidays, because she had more people around besides her parents.

As I drove past the signal that indicated the main entry of the village, I saw a few flowers on the ground, as well as marks of rubber of the tires that lead to the side of the road. And watching that made me feel shivers running down my spine.

When I parked my car in front of my house I looked at the house next to it, to her house. The light of her room is turned off, even the curtains are closed. Her car is not parked next to the garage.

If she's not here, then where?

I sigh, walking towards the main door of her house and pressing the doorbell, sighing when I noticed the lights were turned off.

“Hello? Eloise, I want to talk!”

Seconds later the door opened, and my smile dropped when I found her mother looking at me. I was surprised to find her wearing dark clothes, always used to see her wearing bright and neutral colors. Her gaze is not even the same, and the smile she always drew when I came to their house is no longer there.

“What are you doing here?” she frowned, her voice sounding rougher than I expected. “You are not welcomed here anymore”

“What? But… Jane, I want to talk with Eloise… I-”

“Leave this house now! You already did enough. How dare you come back here after everything you did to her? Are you insane?!”

“But… I just…”

“I don't want to see you” she groaned, closing the door on my face.

What did just happen?

I frowned, trying to call again, but I was answered with silence. I sighed, giving up and walked to my house, opening the door and closing it behind me.

“Lottie, is that you?”

I smiled weakly and sighed when I recognized the voice of my grandma, so I walked towards the living room. She was there, on her chair next to the fireplace and whatever she was knitting. The moment she saw me I could see her face light up, smiling softly and leaving both needles on her lap and opening her arms, inviting me to a hug.

“I'm home, nana” I whispered, kneeling to be at her height and hugging her. “Did Eloise come by? It's been a while since I talked with her…”

“Oh, little Lottie…” she whispered. “You came late, my girl”

“Late? Why?” I frowned, pulling away from the hug and looking at her.

“She's no longer here” she smiled weakly.

“What? Then where? She lives here”

Eloise's dream since she was little was to be the owner of the restaurant we always visited when we were little. Everytime we got out of school, we went to that place to have a chocolate milkshake while we did our homework. It was our place, sitting on the fourth table that is next to the door, facing the window and with views to the park.

In that restaurant, during summer, she worked there to make money. She was a waitress, a cashier, and she cleaned the place. But what she loved the most was the moments she worked in the kitchen. She discovered her passion for cooking in the stoves of that restaurant and it helped her decide that she wanted to be a professional chef.

When we moved to London, we lived together during the first years of our studies. She went to the cooking academy while I went to the university. And when she finished her years of formation, she started working on restaurants until she gained a name, a reputation.

Her dream was always going back to our village and make that restaurant a place tourists would go to experience the gastronomy of our country. She always wanted to be a reference in the kitchen.

“Maybe she's in the restaurant” I frowned, getting up and looking around.

Maybe that's why her car is not parked. Because she stayed longer in the restaurant, as usual.

“No, Violet”

I took a deep breath when I heard my cousin's voice behind me. Maya, the oldest one, already married and with a kid.

“Come on, will someone tell me what is going on? Why did Jane say that I'm no longer welcomed? I'm so lost! Where is Eloise?”

“Let me take you somewhere” she smiled weakly, grabbing the keys of her car.

I frown and look at my grandma, watching how she nodded with a sad smile on her lips. Somehow, what is happening it's not good, I could tell because of the shivers that were running all over my body.

I followed Maya, getting inside her car and watching out of the window, hoping she would take me to the restaurant where I thought Eloise would be working. But when she turned to the left, going to the road that goes to the church and next to it to the cemetery, I heart skipped a beat.

No, right? This can't be happening.

“Where are we going?” I frowned, feeling how my hands started to get sweaty, feeling how my heart was beating in my throat making me feel nauseous.

Maya didn't say anything, she only looked at me with a sad smile while she parked the car. She got out and waited for me to follow her, something that took me around a minute. But she waited for me, she stood in front of the car with her hands inside of the pockets of her black coat.

“Come on” she sighed, biting her lip and walking.

Every step I made sounded louder in my ears and it increased the anxiety I was feeling. That anxiety started to become panic and fear.

“Here” Maya sighed, standing in front of a gravestone.

I didn't want to read what it said. I didn't want to know who was buried there. It was recent, the smell of flowers was still recent and I could see that the marble was still shining.

“No” I mumbled, feeling how I was choking with a scream. “No, no. It can't be. No. You are joking, right? This is a cruel joke. Eloise is working in the restaurant and she just wanted to play around, making me pay for something I don't even know I've done. Please, Maya…”

“I’m sorry” she mumbled. “It happened some weeks ago… But Harry came and said that you two stopped being friends and something about you betraying her”

“No!” I exclaimed, looking at her and letting my tears fall. “None of that! Why would I betray her? Just because I chose myself first? Harry is the problem! He manipulated me so many times!”

“May I remind you that you couldn't stop saying that you loved him?” she said, and somehow that made me flinch. “That he saved you from being raped? That he was always next to you and that you felt so bad and jealous because you wanted to be in Eloise's shoes?”

“That was before I knew the truth…”

“So what? Now that you are having a love story worthy of a fairy tale with that driver you think that you can forget about your family and friends?!”

I closed my eyes, breathing deeply. Maybe she's right… Maybe I was too focused on Lando and I stopped caring for my family… No. Lando has nothing to do with this. He showed me how it is to be loved, he showed me how it is to be loved by a family.

“I tried” I whisper. “I tried to call her, to talk to her. Lando told them to leave the trip because of things that happened between him and Harry. And Eloise wasn't the best friend during those days either. But I never stopped texting her and calling her. She was the one that ghosted me…”

“Look, I'm sorry, okay?” she sighed. “Eloise was a good girl, she didn't deserve this ending”

I swallowed thickly and looked at the flowers. I smiled sadly. There are roses on it, her favorite flower.

“Can you leave me alone?” I whisper.

I heard her walk away without saying anything, and when I felt I was alone, I let out a sob.

How on Earth could this happen? When? Why? Why her? Why did no one tell me? My own family forgot to tell me that my childhood best friend is dead. Those tyre’s marked at the entry of the village and the flowers… It happened that way?

I felt incredibly nauseous and the need to throw up was real, making me run to a tree and bow, emptying my stomach. I tried to breathe, but the tears and the burn on my throat made it impossible.

“Just… why?” I cried, looking back at the grave. “Why? It's not fair! I didn't betray you. Did you feel like that? I chose myself first, for the first time, Eloise. I chose love first… Why did you never answer my calls and texts? It wasn't my fault Harry blackmailed Lando, it wasn't my fault at all… And still you believed him. If there was one who was betrayed, that was me”

I wanted to blame her. But… Is she the one to blame? She loved Harry, she followed him. Of course she did. I would do the same.

“It's not fair at all, Eli” I mumble. “What am I supposed to do now? I just… God. Who am I supposed to talk with about my problems? About my life? Life is unfair, why the hell did you have to leave this way? Who am I going to tell that Lando and I are dating? That he promised me he's going to marry me? Who am I going to ask to be my maid of honor? What the hell am I supposed to do without you, Eloise?”

It hurts so bad. It hurt realizing that she's not here anymore. It hurt so bad realizing that she won't be next to me anymore, that she won't make her dreams come true.

“I'm nothing without you…”

It hurts. But what hurts the most is that for the first time I experienced what is it to lose someone you love, someone that was important for you.

“I just… I'll miss you, Eli, so much. I already do”

I took a deep breath and just let the tears fall while I fixed the flowers on her grave, tracing with my fingers the letters of it.

“In loving memory of Eloise Taylor. Born on the 23 of October of 1999” I whisper, feeling a knot on my throat as I traced the next words of it. “Dead… The 27 of December of 2023”

I felt empty, so empty.

When I returned to London,instead of going back home, I went somewhere else.

The park where Eloise and I went to spend our afternoons together was close to the first apartment I ever lived in, with her. It was on the other side of London, in a small neighborhood. I sat on a bench, right next to a streetlight, and hugged myself.

I didn't notice how long I stayed there until I looked at my phone, reading the notifications of messages and missed calls.

Lando🧡: how are things going? Did you talk with her?

Lando🧡: text me once you are coming back home, okay? I'll make something for dinner

Lando🧡: Babe?

Lando🧡: is everything okay? I'm worried

Lando🧡: Baby, please answer. Where are you? It's late and it's getting dark

Lando🧡 missed calls (3)

I took a deep breath and smiled weakly, pressing the call button and placing the phone on my phone.

“Violet? Thank God!”

“Lando…”

“Where are you? Are you still in your village? You are staying with Eloise? Did you talk?”

“Lando, she…”

“God, I was so worried” he sighed, relieved.

“She's dead”

“What? What did you say?”

“Eloise” I mumble, sniffling softly. “Eloise is dead… she's no longer here. She… she died”

Silence. He was quiet. I could hear his breathing, how it got stuck on his throat.

“Where are you”

“I… I need to be alone” I whisper.

“Violet please…”

I closed my eyes tightly and took a deep breath, telling him the address of where I am. He didn't end the call, he stayed on it, making me hear everything he did, how he walked out of the apartment, how he went to his car and turned the engine on.

“There you are” he sighed, ending the call and sitting next to me.

I felt his arms wrapping me and pulling me to his chest, holding me tight.

“How did it happen?” he mumbled, brushing my hair with his fingers.

“She… she crashed” I whisper. “She was going home and the road was frozen…”

“Oh…”

“What am I going to do without her?” I whisper “I… I feel like someone took something away from me, a part of my heart. A-and she left thinking that I betrayed her… she left and no one told me because Harry said…”

“Harry knew?” Lando frowned. “And he didn't tell you?”

“N-no…” I mumble, looking up at him. “He told her parents that we argued… That's why they didn't call me”

Lando took a deep breath and kissed my forehead. He held my hand and kissed it.

“This just made me realize how scared I am to lose you” I said looking at him.

“You won't lose me” he said, cupping my cheek and resting his forehead against mine, closing his eyes. “You won't lose me, ever. I made a promise, remember? I promised that I will never let you go, that I will never leave you”

“What am I supposed to do, Lando?” I whisper. “I lost Eloise because of a car… How am I supposed to feel knowing that you work in one? I just…”

“You will never lose me” he repeated, squeezing my hand. “I'll make sure of that. I'll start every race and finish it to be next to you. You are my checkered flag. I'll race as much as I have to just to get out of the car and hold you”

“Just… never leave me” I whisper. “Never, okay?”

“Never” he nodded. “You have my heart, I can't live without it. Just keep it safe with you and everything will be alright”

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ineffablywriting · 1 year

Text

break my heart again

an angsty one shot about overheard conversations, Grammy awards and a girl who just wants to be loved

“I’m sorry,” Harry apologised, regret etched into his face.

“Don’t be,” Bella replied, not turning to look at him. “I can’t say I didn’t see this coming.”

“It’s the Grammy’s,” He implored, reaching out and tugging on her shoulder to get her to look back at him.

She shrugged his arm off and took a step further away before sucking in a deep breath and turning to face Harry once again. “I know. And I get it. I really get it, Harry. This is a big opportunity for you and you have a real chance of winning.”

“Yes, exactly!” He said in relief, allowing a small smile to curl his lips. But Bella didn’t smile back and his own slipped off just as quickly as it had appeared. “There’s a but,” he stated.

“There’s a but,” Bella nodded. “My sister’s wedding is on the same day. You knew this.”

“I know,” he agreed.

“But this is more important to you,” Bella continued for him.

“Don’t put words in my mouth,” Harry replied sharply, his lips turning down as he tried not to snarl. He hated when people accused him of things when they had no idea what was going through his head.

“I’m not,” she shrugged. “I heard you on the phone to your manager,” she took another step away from him.

“You were listening in on my phone calls?” he glared at her, feeling a pinch in his chest. He ignored it, refusing to acknowledge the trickle of guilt forming in his heart.

“You know I wasn’t,” Bella shook her head, already so disappointed she couldn’t even find herself feeling angry at his accusal. “I had come over cause we were meant to go to dinner that night. You were the one who gave me a key to your house, remember?”

Another step back, and this time Harry’s eyes flashed as he stomped across the room and stood right in front of her. “Why are you slowly stepping further and further away?” he asked her, his voice a low growl. “We need to talk about this. You can’t just decide to leave.”

Bella swallowed back the lump in her throat and looked away from him, her eyes landing on her shoes as she tried to draw up enough courage to say what she needed to say.

“This isn’t working, Harry,” she told him.

“What do you mean?” he took a sudden step back, his voice once again back to its normal decibel.

“I mean, I think we need to stop pretending this, whatever this is between us, is working. Your career is always going to be more important to you. I will always be further down that list. I don't even come in second,” she scoffed bitterly, wrapping her arms around her stomach to try and hold herself together as she felt herself fall apart inside.

“What the fuck are you on about, love?” he scoffed right back. “You’re talking rubbish. We’ve known each other our whole lives, no one else works as well as we do.”

“Harry,” Bella sighed, looking up at him once again. “I know.”

“Know what?”

“I’ve known from the start. This thing between us was never real for you.” She lifted a hand and rubbed away the lone tear that had escaped. She hadn’t even felt them building.

“What?” This time Harry took a step back, fear of what Bella was saying and worry about what she was about to reveal, causing his heart to race.

“I heard you talking to Jeff that day over a year ago, before you asked me out. How dating me would be great for your image since we’ve known each other longer than almost anyone else. How dating someone who wasn’t famous would be a better brand for you, to make you more relatable to the fans. How it would make you more endearing,” she spoke, not taking a breath and letting out all the words she’d buried deeper and deeper in her chest for the last year of her life. “I’d hoped maybe, just maybe that you’d fall in love with me too. I thought maybe when you gave me a key to your place it meant that you cared just a little. But I was wrong. And I don’t blame you,” she continued. “It was my fault. I knew what I was getting into and I did it anyway.”

“Bella,” Harry paused and took a deep breath then started again. “I…fuck. I should have told you from the start,” he began, hating the heartbroken look on her face. “But you have to know that I do-”

“Don’t,” Bella stopped him, anger written all over her face. “Don’t lie to me,” she told him. “Not anymore.”

“Did you even realise that I also got the email Jeff sent to you and your management and PR team?” she asked him.

“No,” Harry looked horrified, feeling sick at the reminder of the words he’d read and the words he’d typed back, hitting reply all in the email.

“Yes,” Bella said sadly. “So I’m saving you the trouble. Here’s my key,” she placed it on the coffee table by the door where Harry had thrown his own keys. “I’ve already told my sister that you won’t be able to make it to her wedding - she said congrats on the Grammy nomination and she hopes you win. So, you don’t have to worry about finding an excuse to - what was it you called it? - an excuse to get out of going to a stuffy event that you didn’t care about?”

Harry flinched at the harsh words he’d used. He remembered being so angry and frustrated that day that he’d been rude in every conversation he’d had, and every email and text he’d sent. Things hadn’t gone right in the studio and he’d taken it out on everyone around him.

“Bella,” he tried again, but she held up a hand.

“Don’t worry, Harry,” she sighed, shoulders dropping in defeat. “Like I said we don’t have to pretend anymore, at least not between us. I know you want to go to the Grammy’s. And I know you want it to go off without a hitch, so I won’t say anything.”

“Say anything?” he repeated, dumbly. “About us being broken up,” she told him, not meeting his eyes.

“Broke-broken up?”

“That’s the next step according to the emails. They all seemed to think I was in on all of this,” she waved her hands around between the two of them. “So they sent me a timeline of when and how we were to break up and all the things I was and wasn’t allowed to say about it.”

“They did what?” Harry asked, and when she looked up at him he looked furious.

“Yeah,” Bella reached into her bag and pulled out a crumpled up piece of paper with a list of instructions on it. She handed it over to Harry. “I- I thought you would have helped come up with these.”

Harry was silent for a couple of minutes, reading down the list, his jaw clenching and unclenching as his fingers tightened on the edges. “I would never come up with anything like this,” he told her, looking up. His eyes were pleading with her to believe him. But Bella just shrugged and looked away, and Harry didn’t think his heart had ever ached this much in his life. “It still doesn’t matter,” she told him.

“Of course it matters!” He hissed. “No one told me about this shit,” he waved the paper at her.

Bella smiled a little bitterly, her eyes once again looking so sad. “No one told me about our whole relationship, so I guess that kinda makes two of us.”

He flinched back at her comment and she regretted saying anything. Despite everything, she still didn’t want to hurt him.

“Like I said, it doesn’t matter,” she shut her eyes, counted to ten and then looked back up at him. “I already agreed to all the conditions. You’ll go to the Grammy’s and win your awards and feel accomplished, and I’ll go to my sister’s wedding and spend the day with my family pretending everything is fine between us. Then a few weeks later, your team will let it slip to the media that we’re going through a rough patch and a couple days later we’ll confirm that we’ve broken up,” she told him, not an ounce of emotion behind her words.

Harry hated it.

“No,” Harry shook his head. “I don’t want to break up.”

“Harry,” Bella sighed, this time sounding exasperated. “Not everything is about what you want.”

“I know that,” he said defensively.

“Then you need to accept that this is happening.”

“You-you want to break up?” he asked her, his chest tight. He couldn't breathe.

Bella shook her head and Harry almost felt a little bit of relief until she spoke again. “I want to be loved,” she said sadly. “And I don’t think you know how to do that.”

She took a step forward and gripped Harry’s hand. “I hope - I hope one day you’ll realise your worth isn’t defined by your success and I hope that one day you’ll be able to let yourself fall in love with someone who makes you forget about the rest of the world enough that you put them first. And I’m sorry that wasn’t me.”

Then she turned and walked out the door, leaving Harry clutching hold of the locket he’d given her. He opened it and stared at the two photos she’d placed inside one night when they’d been cuddled on the couch watching a movie.

The two images stared back at him, teasing him cruelly with the smiling faces of himself and Bella when they were ten. The same smiles were on the other side with a picture of them ten years later when they’d recreated their childhood photo.

He didn’t realise he was crying until a single tear dripped onto the locket.

Helloooo, it’s been a while. A lot has changed in my life so I’ve been a bit busy haha. I would love some feedback tho. I haven’t written anything in over a year so I’m feeling a little rusty. Let me know what y’all think! 🫶🏼

#harry styles fanfic #harry styles fiction #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fic #harry styles fan fic #harry styles #album of the year #harry styles writing #harry styles one shot #harry styles imagine #harry styles imagines #harry fic #harry styles oneshot #one direction fanfic #one direction fanfiction #my writing #writing

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