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am-i-the-asshole-official · 2 months

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AITA for being condescending towards an asexual kid in GSA?

🙃🏳️‍🌈 to find later

Long post so buckle up.

I (17, they/it/he) am one of three co-leaders of my school’s GSA, along with R (18, she/her) and N (17, he/him). All three of us are openly bi, and I’m also openly trans and (most importantly) very loudly aromantic. We’re all in 12th grade now but we were leaders last year (in 11th grade) too. The school/GSA is small enough that all four grades (9–12, so around 13–18 years old) are in the same GSA, there’s no separate upper grade and lower grade groups. We also have two advisors, both cis queer teachers; and some younger queer faculty members also join sometimes for formal events. We take turns running events during club time, such as fun crafts or watching music videos. Sometimes we also do educational stuff or documentaries, including having teachers come in to facilitate discussions.

I’ve been planning (since early December) to run a two part series of discussions about asexuality and aromanticism (separate discussions of each). I really just wanted to do one day about aromanticism, but R said that if I did that, people would derail it and just talk about asexuality anyways, which both N and our advisors also agreed made sense. So, it’s two days, and the asexuality one is first so that the aromanticism one can be closer to Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week (ASAW).

There’s a girl in GSA, let’s call her A (16, she/her), who’s in 11th grade. She’s very socially awkward and if someone points out that she’s accidentally said something rude or offensive she’ll make a big deal out of not knowing and generally derail the conversation. Also, two years ago A made a ton of “jokes” about me and my little sibling (16MtF) being “secretly dating.” When I asked her (politely at first) to stop, she said she was just joking around, and kept doing it. I asked her again and also asked the theatre teacher and school counselor for help, and eventually she did stop. But A kept following me around and trying to be friends with me, and I was super uncomfortable to the point that I asked the school counselor to facilitate a conversation between A and I so that I could ask her to fucking stop. It somewhat worked. Now she still keeps trying to start conversations with me in the hallways and such, but I just brush her off or ignore her.

The one place I can’t do that is during GSA. Since I’m a leader, I have to be civil to everyone and actually talk to people (R, N, and I set norms at the start of the year during our planning meetings). A is asexual but not aromantic, and today she showed up like 5 minutes into lunch (cafeteria lines are annoying) and loudly asked if she was late. We weren’t doing anything in GSA today, just chilling. At some point during the meeting I announced casually that next week we’d be discussing asexuality, and then the week after that we’d talk about aromanticism, which leads nicely into ASAW during February break. When I said this, A immediately said that she would be extra ace that week [during ASAW]. I was like, “during aromantic spectrum awareness week?!?!” in the same tone of that “during pride month?!?!” meme. She looked like someone had just given her an F on the most important test of the year and said she hadn’t known.

I also made a comment about how there’s way more openly aspec people at our school than at most schools, and N said that maybe the presence of role models is part of that (clear subtext: he was referring to me). I said pretty loudly (more people could hear) that it was kinda funny that I’m the “ace role model” when I’m literally not asexual. A looked super lost and confused at this, and I think she might’ve thought I was ace, even though I’m super open about not being ace, and have told her directly more than once.

Here’s where the potential assholery comes into play. There’s an ad for PrEP that was fairly common on the back covers of theatre playbills in the past year. The ad shows a Black man dressed in ripped leggings with fishnets, shiny knee-length heeled leather boots, and some sort of white leather harness, doing a bridge pose with one leg extended upwards so that the “r” in PrEP is resting on the sole of the boot. The ad has a bright red background and text that says “you cast of PrEP options is changing” along with a small QR code and website link. The pose is somewhat provocative, but not out of place on a playbill for an all-ages show.

During GSA, A was saying that she thought the ad was bad, because of the leather being “fetish gear” and “weird” (basically the same arguments people use to say that gay people shouldn’t be allowed in public). I told A that there’s nothing wrong with someone wearing leather, and she said that “it’s fetish gear and that’s disgusting and degenerate and just bad advertising!”

I explained calmly, like I would to a child (although I probably wouldn’t talk about this topic with a child), that PrEP is a medicine that people take if they anticipate having sex with someone who’s HIV-positive, so it’s okay that the ad is somewhat suggestive. She seemed to accept that, but still said that the leather was weird, and the ad should’ve shown “a diverse group of people getting pills at a pharmacy” instead, because “fetish gear” was too much.

I asked if she thought that all leather clothing was inherently fetishistic, to which A said yes, and then I asked, “do you know that people can’t just choose fetishes?”

She hadn’t known that, but she still said the ad was too sexual. I pointed out that it was a fairly well-targeted advertisement, using theatre references, but maybe A was not part of the target demographic. I also said that sometimes outfits are just hot without there needing to be any fetishes involved, which she didn’t refute, and that even if it was a fetish, that wouldn’t make it inherently “bad” or “degenerate” at all.

A said that she still didn’t like it, and I told her that she was entitled to have whatever feelings she wanted to have, but that doesn’t mean the advertisement itself is a problem.

Another person (17, he/him) called out “[OP], what do you think about kink at pride?” in a sort of nonchalant way, so I walked over while saying “i’m pro–kink at pride.” The conversation eventually moved in other directions, and then club ended and we had to go to our next classes.

TL;DR: given my position of power and responsibility as a GSA leader, AITA for being kinda condescending towards an ace person who’s 2 years younger than me because she was being very sex-negative about an ad for PrEP?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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creekfiend · 1 year

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Man sometimes I think about the gay adults in my life when I was a kid and I get so emotions

My shop ("technology education") teacher in middle school was this extremely gruff no nonsense older dyke who I was just totally enchanted by and she brought her rescue dog to class all the time and I like, drew her Sailor Moon drawings to put on her classroom door in sparkly gel pen. Other kids would go "ew I heard she's a lesbian" at lunch and I would be like "what did you say. Say that to my face. Meet me in the pit. I have no idea why I feel so strongly about this but meet me in the pit nevertheless. I'm 12 and I would take a bullet for Nancy Lynn and her wife who I have Never met"

Just. When ur a baby gay and ur like. "I have no idea why I would trust this loud opinionated masculine woman with my life," lol

I often wonder what she thought. As an adult now I am like, "Oh yeah, I can for sure identify when kids are fascinated by me because there is something about themselves that they see in me and they're curious and excited to meet an adult who is like them in some way even tho they don't know why" so she must have known. She was very nice to me and we were friends and she knew my parents also. so. OH IM FEELING EMOTIONS ABOUT IT ALL OVER AGAIN

Man. I love. Middle aged butches

A friend of mine has two 12 year old kids and one is a furry who loves to draw Wolves With Horns and I am going to stop at their house and visit when my friend and I drive back with Flare this spring and so my friend was telling her kids about me and she showed them some pictures and her kid was like SO EXCITED and my friend sent me a bunch of voice messages from her this morning being like "WOW I LOVE THE MOON TOO. WHAT DO YOU LIKE TO DRAW THEN MOST? WHATS YOUR FAVORITE COLOR MINE IS PURPLE" this kid already knows she is queer because her mom and her school are awesome and 2023 is a different place to be 12 in than 2001. But I'm still like 🥺 TO BE AN ASPIRATIONAL FIGURE FOR QUEER KIDS.. ooogh. Feelings

#i was also lowkey in love with our very gay family friend Steve as a child bc he was so CLEVER and FUNNY and WITTY #equal opportunity infant gay baby.

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indiecrowarts · 1 year

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There’s something so wholesome about the camaraderie between strangers who see eachother with their mobility aids. Here’s a few of my favorite examples I’ve experienced:

The time I had a really nice conversation with an older gentleman about this beautiful wooden walking stick he was using. His daughter worked in South Africa and brings new walking sticks for him made by craftsman where she works- it was really sweet and his walking stick was beautifully made :)

The time I was delivering food and it took a little while for the customer to come to the door, it ended up being an older woman with a walker profusely apologizing to me because she was slow, I showed her my cane and told her I understood and it wasn’t a problem, I could tell it made her feel better <3

The time one of my substitute teachers brought her cane to school and we chatted while I was working on my ap art project about how certain kids in my high school could be mean and insensitive, and we complimented each others cane patterns~

The time I was trying to deliver food to a hotel and I got to chat with two other queer people who were working as desk hosts, one was a cane user and we were talking about how dumb it was that a lot of businesses in my town could be really discriminatory towards employees with mobility aids (which is why he hides his in his car and why I was forced to leave my job). It was really cathartic and it was nice connecting with another human over shared issues <3

The time I met a special needs student by accepting her hug and having a nice conversation with her- she complimented my cane and was super sweet and nice- I could tell her aid was worried about how I’d respond to a stranger coming up and hugging me, but once she saw I reciprocated the hug- as well as my cane, I could tell she was relieved. I saw her a few more times after that and she always waved hi and shouted “Friend!” across the hall and it made me really happy :)

I don’t know there’s just something about events like this that warm my heart and I wanted to share

#young cane user #cane user #disabled #disability #disability positivity #disability pride #arthritis #fybromyalgia #mobility aid #young and disabled #wholesome #made my day #made my night #positivity

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hyperfixations-and-hecticness · 2 years

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I hate when they change like vital plot points of a book to fit in a movie. I mean, first of all the iconic F outfits. The Circus of Talents. We lost Princess Uma, a bad bitch if there ever was one. Anyway thoughts below but I can’t add a read more on mobile so sorry. Spoilers obviously.

Thoughts on the School for Good and Evil movie

Good

- The design and aesthetic of all of it was beautiful. I mean like everything was elegant and stunning and just visually incredibly pleasing.

- Sofia Ann Caruso is a great Sophie, she’s cringey and mean and overdramatic. She is the love child of Megamind and Regina George.

- Also Theron and Washington made great professors.

- The Tedros had a cool sword, iconic dumbassery, was pretty and also had cool fits which is how I like my men personally.

- Sophie and Agatha’s friendship at the start was super natural and well written.

- Soman cameo.

- I loved the little addition of Professor Anemone previously being a history teacher. It was just such a nice little touch to the world building and her character.

- The inherent creepiness of the casting for Rafal. I mean I always imagined him looking like a teenager but him looking like he’s in his twenties and trying to claim Sophie as his child bride really adds that extra layer of ickiness.

- Literally everything with Gregor Charming. An icon, a legend, he is the moment.

Bad

- Sofie Wylie is a good Agatha but they wrote her so blandly. Also like where was the initial awkwardness? We deserved bitchy goth loner Agatha. And like it would’ve been cool if Agatha was more conventionally unattractive. Like no hate to Sofie Wylie she’s absolutely gorgeous but it would’ve been nice if she did have that whole thing of yeah people don’t think she’s pretty but then her personality begins to outweigh that.

- Where the actual everloving fuck where Anadil’s rats? I was promised little rats. I was robbed.

- Why were all the Ever girls such bitches? I mean like passive aggressive? Yeah sure. But they were outright bullies.

- The plot change of Rafal purposefully letting Good grow complacent and vain. I think it’s more interesting when you have Good who genuinely have grown complacent without the manipulation of true evil or whatever. It adds more weight to it.

- The Circus of Talents was iconic and we deserved to have the wolves and fairies reveal.

- The blood magic? I mean like what? You have regular magic, no deus ex machina necessary.

- More development between our girls and Teddy. Like I love him being a pathetic little scrunkly but it felt like everything happened in two days. This may have been better adapted as a show considering it’s meant to be covering a whole year of school.

- We deserved hot pink finger glows.

- Lack of iconic book characters: Princess Uma, Castor and Pollux, the Golden Goose, the little pets they had, Anadil’s rats (yes I’m bitter), the librarian dude whose name I’m forgetting, he has Giles vibes, the seer, you know the dude.

- I wanted to see Hort’s frog pajamas.

- The actual explanation for the nemesis stuff like in the books.

- Where was the witches/Agatha friendship? Sophie betraying Aggie to avoid going home? Dovey caring about Good?

- More mean Sophie. Give the people what they want

- It felt so queer-baity. I know the book three twist but like it was just annoying.

Edit - Also the iconic line ‘I’m worse than my father. Because I still love you.’

All in all it was a fun movie but having loved the books as a kid I felt like they didn’t really get done justice. Two and a half hours wasn’t enough to cover the whole story adequately in my opinion.

#school for good and evil #sge sophie #sge movie #soman chainani #agatha of woods beyond #charlize theron #kerry washington #lady lesso #kit young #sofia wylie

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lupuslikethewolf · 1 year

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marauders!au where the war never happened and they all got to go on and live happy lives :) its set years later, when Harry, Ron, Neville, Luna and Hermione are going into their first year.

I haven’t come up with an actual plot yet :/ but this is the setting, and they are all around their early-to-mid-thirties at this point. it's likely just domestic fluff and slice-of-life type shit, with Harry still getting into impossible amounts of fuckery whilst stressing at least 10 different adults (as he should tbh)

i can't decide whether this is set in the 90s or in the modern!era so i left it ambiguous

Barty Crouch Jr, now Professor Barty (just Barty, Crouch is my father), teaches DADA and his fiancé, Evan Rosier, is a Magizoologist who travels during the school year, comes back home for the holidays and weekends to spend with Barty, either on Hogwarts grounds or at their own home. Barty has a close friendship with McGonagall, who is Headmistress, and Poppy (who are married, but no one figured it out).

Dorcas and Marlene play International-Level Quidditch: Dorcas for England, and Marlene for Wales or Ireland (undecided). Everyone thinks they hate each other from the way they treat each other during games. They played for the Holyhead Harpies until they got recruited, and their wedding was basically the biggest, most dramatic and over-the-top graduation party Hogwarts had ever seen, hosted in the Potter Manor. everyone was hungover for days afterwards

Lily and Snape are best-friends-turned-rivals, who achieved a Mastery in Potions at the same time, and are both the youngest people to ever do so. Sev specialises in theoretical potions, and Lily specialises in experimental work, altering old potions and creating new ones. She commandeered the entire basement for her own potions lab, and Remus helps her research in his spare time.

Pandora started publishing with Xenophillius (the definition of gender-fuckery; no-one knows how they identify, not even Xeno), and they publish the most outlandish work they can, alongside Pandora’s books!! They also run Xeno's Quibbler and a couple other independent newspapers. They live out in the countryside w/ Luna. Barty & Evan are their only walking-distance neighbours, but they floo to their friends houses semi-regularly

MaryLily and StarChaser are co-parenting Harry, and being godparents/family friends of Draco, Blaise Zabini, Ron, Neville and Luna. When Harry is at pre-school, he makes friends with Hermione, and the four of them introduce Dr and Dr Granger to the magical world over the years, instead of the two month crash-course Hogwarts gives

Mary is an artist, and since she was raised half-blood, absolutely adores the technique and process of muggle painting, later enchanting it to move and learn and talk. She doesn't own anything that isn't stained with paint, bleach or hair dye. She is famous for her work, in Magical and Muggle circles, but is almost completely anonymous, and they only know what she looks like because of a group portrait she painted

Regulus is an independent researcher of old Pagan traditions and 'Muggle' magic, how different solstices and days (like All Hallows Eve) affect the Magical community, etc. He visits Barty at Hogwarts with Harry every few weeks, and later with Hermione as well, so they grew up learning about the secrets at Hogwarts, in the library, and with the teachers. Also friendly house rivalry, and the adults completely split on which houses they will go into at Hogwarts. Evan started a betting pool.

James and Sirius are the wizarding private investigators. They work everywhere, for everyone (no matter what. they don't need to charge more than what people can afford), and love it. James absolutely adores the 'Sherlock Holmes' vibes, but they are both Sherlock Holmes b/c they are simply too baddass not to be!

Remus opened a bookstore-cafe, and him and Sirius live in the flat above it. It’s really popular and became the place for students and young queer people. The bookstore stocks everything from really popular and really unknown books and authors of every genre. The regulars also notice all these really famous but really mysterious friends of Remus who come-and-go (artist!mary, author!pandora, athletes!dorlene, etc). And then, of course, is the “private” investigator boyfriend, who couldn’t be less subtle at anything if he tried.

Alice is still an Auror, and the Best of the Best, but she is so fucking fed up of the politics, DMLE, and Ministry in general. She is starting a revolution/reformation from the inside- and if that doesn’t work, quit her job and do the same thing from the outside! Frank ended up in law and becoming a Lawyer, and is glad he did, because it might be the only thing that will keep his partner out of jail if she decides to commit treason. They love Neville to bits, and would do anything for him!! They built a whole-ass greenhouse when he discovered his talent.

Peter Pettigrew works part-time with Remus at his place, but is currently training with Gringotts/other cursebreakers to become a professional cursebreaker! it is taking a long ass time with a lot of testing and work to put in, but Peter finds it interesting and it meant that he always has more stories to tell the kids when he sees them, which is a bonus because children are hard to entertain.

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lenaboskow · 18 days

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gay!eddie is happening in the near future, a post brought to you by someone who spends way too much time dissecting queer media (and usually ends up being at least half right)

bear with me, it's a long one under the cut

i have a longer, more scene specific post that i will finish during the break if nothing happens tonight but i am a full believer that eddie's big arc this season (or next season, depending) is that the reason none of his past relationships worked out is because he's gay (not bi, gay)

disclaimers: i fully believe eddie loved shannon, just not the way he wanted to. you can also be gay and still enjoy heterosexual sex. sometimes sex really is just sex. this post is purely about romantic attraction.

I also tried to leave as much out about buck as possible (though that's hard, the man is obviously an integral part of his life) because gay!eddie diaz will happen no matter if buddie is endgame, and people need to realize that. their sexualities are more than just about each other.

anyways, on to the post-

it's canon that eddie will put christopher first when it comes to deciding relationships, and i think we first see that with shannon. rewatching season 2, i didn't get the impression that he wanted a romantic relationship with her, but he wanted her back in his son's life, and to eddie, those two go hand in hand.

and, if we're being honest, i think eddie's habit of putting other people first is the whole reason he got with shannon, because his family taught him that he was supposed to find a nice girl and settle down. who better to do that with than his best friend? my theory is further proven when shannon gets pregnant and eddie marries her out of a sense of duty, and then immediately ships off to afghanistan under the pretense of "providing" (and isn't it something that he picks a profession where he'll be away from his family for months at a time)

the only reason eddie returned is because of the helicopter crash, to which shannon immediately started talking about moving to california. while i believe that wanting to rest after the crash could be part of the reason he was hesitant, i think there was also a fear of what would happen when he was no longer near his family he was trying to please.

of course, eddie eventually moves to la after getting a job offer from both lafd and chicago. carla mentions that it is only thirty minutes from shannon, and while that could be because he wanted to reconcile, i think it was more to do with wanting to have his son's mother near. that, and lafd is the best in the world (according to eddie)

eddie only kisses shannon in 2x07 after she does her family interview for the school. this specific fact coupled with the absence of the eddie diaz heart eyes™️ (which, despite his closing off at the beginning of the series, we'd already seen in 2x01 when he and buck call truce) makes me believe he realized he could trust her and wanted her back in his son's life, and the way to do that was to get back together.

"but they hid their relationship for a while" eddie was still scared. comphet is a real thing, and causes people to act on things they necessarily don't want. i believe he pursued a romantic relationship with shannon because that's what she wanted, and if he kept her happy, she wouldn't leave again. this is why i wish we could've seen divorced shannon/eddie instead of her dying immediately, and i wonder if maybe it would've sped up the whole deconstruction process for him.

the next time eddie dates, it's with ana. on paper, ana is the perfect wife for him. she's a teacher, knows how to handle kids, is latina, the whole package. eddie tries so hard to make it work, that it actually does, and this causes him to panic. both carla and buck tell eddie not to take just chris into consideration, but to make sure he wants it too, and after some time, he breaks it off with her. the way ana reacted to the breakup makes me wonder if she could also sense the reason for the breakup.

marisol is where it starts to get tricky, but i feel like we've seen enough (or not enough) in these four episodes to piece some information together. chris is the one who encourages eddie to call her, and that makes me wonder if that's the reason they're still together. before the promo of the bucktommy date eddie and marisol crash, we only got two mentions of marisol, and both times was in relation to her helping with chris. at this point, eddie has spent more time with tommy than he has with marisol, as far as we're aware.

the synopsis of tonight's ep says that eddie and marisol "take a closer look at their relationship" and given that we haven't seen much of them on screen, it makes me wonder what this could be about. does it maybe have something to do with them crashing the bucktommy date?

obviously, i wouldn't be mad if eddie turned out to be bi. however, to me, all of his relationships seem be a big case of comphet. speaking from experience, as someone who's pursued relationships with men purely because that's what i was expected to do, not because i actually wanted to be with them. and just like eddie, there was a time where if my best friend (who was of the opposite gender) had asked me out, I would've said yes and married him had it come to that, because it would've made my family happy. i've gotten to a point where i don't care what my conservative family thinks or wants, and i truly believe that this season, we'll see eddie get to that place to.

if you've made it this far, thank you for listening, and here's to hoping we get gay!eddie tonight.

tag: @queeredmundo

#911 spoilers #911 #911 abc #911 on abc #eddie diaz #gay eddie diaz #911 speculation

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thatgirlonstage · 4 months

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I’m slowly working my way through Le Guin’s Earthsea series, which I’m mostly like, eh, it’s fine but it’s hardly seizing me by the skull and turning my brain inside out like her adult sci-fi stuff has so far. I don’t know if I’m too old for it and would have appreciated it more as a kid/teen, or it’s just not my thing in general (I see this series recc’ed a lot as an alternative for That Other Series Where Wizards Go To School and while I think that’s fine as a, here’s a book to buy your 8yo nephew instead of the other one, I really don’t think it’s a good rec for someone who used to love that series and is looking to fill that void, because the vibe is EXTREMELY different imo, especially after the first book)

I am however sitting and clutching my head about Farthest Shore and the incredibly casual gay teacher crush that Arren has on Ged.

It never goes anywhere, it is always suffused with the “teenager talking about the hot teacher” kind of feeling, and it evens out significantly over the course of the book into more platonic respect and companionship, but at the beginning it is absolutely a crush in the romantic/sexual sense and it is not subtle

And it just. This book was published in 1972. It is over two decades older than me. I could have read this book as a kid. I could have had this. I have no idea if it would have changed anything or gotten through to me earlier but… but I wish I’d had it.

I don’t know. There’s a lot of queer media stuff out now that I’m really happy kids have and in some abstract sense I might wish that I’d had that world growing up, but at the same time, I can’t… Steven universe or the owl house couldn’t have existed in 2001. The world would have to have been a fundamentally different place. And I don’t know the me who would have grown up in that world. I don’t know what they or she or he or xe would be like. That’s a different person who is not me.

But this—this has been here the whole time. I could have read this at any time. And I’ve never even heard of it. I feel like I maybe saw A Wizard of Earthsea on bookstore shelves sometimes? But I never touched it and I don’t know anyone who read it and I certainly had no fucking idea this kind of relationship was in the series until I read it with my own two eyes. Even as an adult I’ve only heard people talk about Wizard and a little bit about Tombs of Atuan. I knew absolutely nothing about Farthest Shore until I picked it up for myself.

I don’t have a neat conclusion here. I don’t even know if I have a point. I’m just. Missed opportunities.

#earthsea #le guin

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elamimax · 1 year

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There's a lot of people who really, really love the "magical school" setting, but for obvious reasons don't want to support Jowling Kowling anymore.

So, I wrote a YA novel.

Jonathan Rosewood is, not to put too fine a point on it, dead. Well, almost dead. Like, basically dead. But he's being given a second chance: to become the familiar of a young witch-in-training. Luckily for him, that means a second lease on life, access to a magical world and incredible abilities, not to mention a whole host of new friends. Unluckily for him, he does still have to go to class, and occasionally giant monsters seem to try to kill him.

With a whole host of young characters, several of which are some form of queer, Jonathan has to figure out how to navigate his own burgeoning identity, the fact that he's a female cat sometimes, as well as the growing realization that there is more to this magical world than meets the eye.

Any Other Name is a queer reimagining of the genre, with a more anti-authoritarian, anti-status quo bent, and hey, this one is by a trans author! You can buy it on Amazon or wherever else you get your epubs :)

His hands in his pockets, shoulders squared and eyes to the ground, Jonathan crossed the road and tried to bury his face in the collar of his jacket. It was eerily quiet when he almost bumped into a chair he realised was in front of a table. Already strange to see these things outside, but on a zebra crossing? He looked up and saw a woman sitting behind the table. She looked a little bit like one of those well-meaning middle-school teachers, who rewarded thirteen-year-olds with stickers (who would pretend not to be proud of them), all rosy cheeks and smelling faintly of incense and a minimum of two cats. She was wearing what appeared to be a dress from the Fifties; the only thing ‘off’ about the presentation was a tattoo of an eye peeking out of her dress at her collarbone. She smiled at him, and indeed, her cheeks were rosy and round. “Hello,” she said. “Um,” Jonathan responded. “Please, sit down. My name is Charlie. Charlie Ferman.” The lady’s smile was unwavering and eerily genuine. It wasn’t predatory or scary, just… disarmingly honest. “You’re in the middle of the street,” Jonathan said. The lady giggled, a sound like sleighbells ringing through the air on a christmas morning. “I don’t think that will be a problem,” she said, and rolled her eyes at her surroundings in an exaggerated display. Jonathan looked. The world had stopped. Cars had all braked for some reason, he thought, until he realised that people, too, had frozen in place. A man was trying to get a pigeon from pecking at his hotdog, and it was hovering just a few feet from his face. “I don’t understand,” Jonathan said. He sat down out of shock, more than out of any obligation to do as the lady asked. “Gosh, I do so hate this part,” Charlie said. “You’re dead.” Jonathan looked at her. “No, I’m not,” he said. “I’d know if I was dead. I wouldn’t be talking to you.” “Well, you’re not wrong. But you also kind of are,” Charlie said with an apologetic little smile and then waved in the other direction. Jonathan only just now became aware of the fact that there was a sixteen-wheeler only a foot from the table. “You’re going to be dead,” Charlie said. “In just a few hundredths of a second. It’ll be fairly painless, if that helps. Would you like a sweet?” She produced a small piece of wrapped candy out of a little purse.

#trans literature #writblr #writing #writers on tumblr #queer lit #young adult #ya books #magical school #trans fiction #queer fiction #Trans protagonist

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randomshyperson · 1 year

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Yellow Curtains - Chapter Two - Wanda Maximoff Series

Summary: Wanda Maximoff's senior year at Novi Grad School is duly planned for her. She has good friends, good grades, and a good system to hide who she really is. Or, the one based on Evak from the Norway Skam series, where Wanda is queer and tries to survive the last year without anyone knowing about it.

Warnings: (+18), general warnings about language and violence, legal drug use, mentions of underage drinking, high school, internalized homophobia and discovery of sexuality, explicit mentions of mental disorders (bipolarity and depression), dysfunctional family, making out, and eventual smut.

Skamverse | Series | General Masterlist | AO3 | Wattpad

--//--

Chapter Two - The Cabin

Ponedeljek 7:30 (Monday 7:30 am)

"Who can dissertate on the Sokovian Revolution of '74?"

The history teacher's question echoed in the classroom, but all he got in response were crestfallen students and soft giggles. T'Challa sighed, a small smile on his lips. "Come on guys, pay attention." He asked, nodding to the digital board where some information from the day's subject matter read. "We discussed last class how the labor revolution allowed Sokovia to become a first-world country in less than fifty years and about how that..."

Wanda's attention fell on the outside, birds flying in the sky above the main courtyard. She watched a few students walk by, and monitors asking what they were doing outside the room, before trying to force her attention back to the matter.

The minutes dragged on as Professor T'Challa explained about Sokovian independence. Wanda didn't usually have trouble with humanities subjects, but lately, she had been so distracted.

Suddenly, the professor's talk was interrupted by the arrival of Vice Principal Harkness at the door. And she was not alone.

"Hi, T'Challa, good morning. We have a new student; She is late but is my fault, we had a problem with the paperwork. Is it okay if she watches the class?" Asked the woman - practically pushing the new student inside.

The teacher agreed, of course, smiling gently, and the whole room looked at the student.

Wanda held her breath, those eyes were so familiar...

"Shit, it's her!" Natasha whispered beside her with some indignation, and Wanda blinked away the new student to her best friend.

"Sorry, what?" the girl asks confused. Natasha nods to the new student's chair.

"It's the girl Carol brought to Tony's party." Nat explains in a low tone so the teacher won't hear. "Shit, I can't believe she's going to study right in our class. I am so unlucky."

T'Challa called for silence from the excited students, and Wanda tried to pay attention to the subject, not understanding why it bothered her that a stranger might be taken.

She was curious about the new student, but everyone else was. And when the class was over, and the table was filled with several other students greeting them and asking where they were from, Wanda gave up trying to find out too.

Natasha seemed willing to run away and practically dragged Wanda out into the courtyard.

They sat down at one of the outside tables, and it wasn't long before Pietro and Clint joined them.

"Maximoff, you have something of mine." Barton declared as soon as he sat down, and Wanda sighed in defeat.

"I don't." She retorted. "I probably lost it at the party."

"What? Damn it, Wanda, it was three hundred euros!"

"I know, sorry." She asks immediately. "What can I do to make it up to you?"

Clint raises an eyebrow. "Well..."

"Dude!" Pietro interrupts with an angry grimace, giving his friend a hard shove. "It's my sister!" He recalls, but Clint laughs, raising his hands as a sign of peace.

"I'm joking, relax!" He assures between laughs. He then slips an arm around Wanda's shoulders, hugging her for a moment. "You don't worry either. It was because of the police at Tony's apartment, right? You were quick to think of getting out of there, he would have gotten in trouble."

Wanda forces a smile. "Yeah, but now I owe you 300 euros."

Clint shrugs. "Pay me back when you can." He says pushing her shoulder against his lightly. "You can do my homework too."

Wanda rolls her eyes, laughing weakly. "I'll think about it."

They fall into casual conversation after that. Clint comments about the party, and the boys on the team, and Pietro talk about his date with Crystal going well. Natasha is distracted, her gaze keeps going to the other side of the yard, and Wanda sighs slightly when she realizes who her friend is staring at.

"Have you talked to Carol yet?" The younger Maximoff asks, receiving a deep sigh in return.

"Not really, but I don't need to right?" Nat retorts looking at Wanda. " She clearly moved on."

Wanda frowns slightly, looking at the small group. The new student seems close to Carol, and they're all laughing, but she's not as sure about it as Natasha is.

"I don't know, Nat, maybe they're just friends." She tries, and Natasha gives a sad laugh.

"Whatever, Wands. It's not like we have anything official."

"I think you should talk to her." Wanda insists, and Pietro and Clint join the conversation as well.

"Me too." Barton says. "Make things clear."

"I don't think so." Pietro comments shrugging. "Avoid her, make her anxious. She'll get the message."

Wanda rolls her eyes. "Don't listen to him."

Nat laughs lightly, and when he sees Tony's group entering the courtyard he lets out an exclamation. "Shit, speaking of crushes, I'll be right back." And walks off towards Tony Stark the next moment.

Wanda feels her blood run cold. From her friend's excitement and the giggles of the boys and glances Tony steals in her direction, she knows exactly what they are talking about.

Natasha runs back to them with a proud smile on her lips.

"Great news, Maximoff." She declares. "Tony told me he's taking his brother for the cabin on the holiday, so we'll all be together and you'll get a chance to get to know him better."

The boys make teasing sounds, and Wanda can only force a laugh.

When the bell rings, announcing the next class, and her gaze meets the new student's on the other side, she wants to believe she is imagining the way her heart speeds up.

The Independence holiday means four days off, and since eighth grade, Wanda's friends organize some trips, mainly to Stark’s winter cabin, even though it's not really cold.

The weeks go by quickly - which is great. Wanda's attention span at school doesn't improve, and she grows irritated at her brain's insistence on stealing glances at the new student, with whom she shares a single history class a week.

She learns a few things about the new student. Their first name, the taste for rock bands that she notices due to the black T-shirts, the skateboarding skills from the item they use to leave school. She learns that they are from New York and that they are not Carol's partner.

It is Natasha who is investigating, of course. And Wanda was in the middle of reading an article when her best friend addresses the whole thing.

"You won't believe it, Maximoff! I'm so stupid!"

Wanda frowns. "What? What are you-"

"Y/N is not Carol's girlfriend! They are sisters!" She declares, holding out her cell phone at the brunette's eye level. "She just posted this."

It is open on Instagram, a photo of Carol with the new student riding her skateboard in the city park. In the caption 'I missed you, little sister! Glad you're here now!" Wanda feels a wave of relief fill her body and doesn't know why.

Natasha exclaims excitedly, "You know what that means, right?"

"Žal ne (No, sorry)." Wanda mutters uncertainly, but Nat chuckles.

"Silly girl, it means I'm back in the game!" Declares the redhead. "I'll like her last few stories and put her back in the best friends. She'll get the message."

"Or you could just talk to her..."

Nat laughs through her nose. "You're funny, Wanda." Says the girl, turning her attention back to her cell phone.

Wanda doesn't want to think too much about the whole matter. She doesn't really know you, and it seems ridiculous that you don't leave her thoughts. She is sure that it is Nat's fault and her momentary obsession with Carol.

When the Independence holiday arrives, and she finds herself in a crowded car heading for Tony Stark's cabin, her anxiety returns. She remembers that there, it would be Vision, and that everyone expected her to leave the cabin with a new boyfriend. Would it be too late to give up the trip?

"I'll take the window bed!" Clint and Pietro got into a pushing fight over the largest room as soon as they arrived. Wanda just wanted to sit down, because Tony's group was finishing checking out the entrance to the cabin's compound - Rich people's stuff - and they were all stealing glances at her.

By the time Carol's car arrived, Wanda was dressed more comfortably and smelled of soap. She had taken advantage of the fight for rooms to use the shower before everyone else, and although she only got one bunk, she was satisfied with the impossibility of sleeping with someone else next to her. It read Vision.

"I swear to god this girl is trying to kill me." Natasha gasps low from the balcony next to Wanda, watching Carol get out of the car in short shorts and a button-down shirt practically all open, showing off a sports top underneath. Wanda laughs at her friend's reaction, but when you get down from the back of the truck, she shallows dry.

You are busy pulling a motorcycle out of the back, and Wanda's brain clicks.

She recognizes the vehicle, and the helmet, and her heart speed up so much that it's the only thing she hears in her ears for a moment.

"Her sister's hot too, huh?" Natasha comments half-impressed, and Wanda immediately looks away.

"I don't know, I don't like girls." She retorts, surprising Nat with her aggressiveness. The redhead gives a confused laugh.

"Okay? But you can tell a girl is pretty without being attracted to her." The redhead says, but Wanda clears her throat and hugs her own body.

"Sure, whatever." She murmurs. "I'm gonna take a nap, I'm tired from the trip." She says, practically running inside.

She doesn't notice your gaze searching for her.

–//–

Petek, 20:40 (Friday, 8:40am)

Wanda awoke in a very quiet cabin.

She wasn't surprised that everyone went to bed early, after all the trip had been equally tiring for everyone, yet it bothered her a little to be the first to wake up.

She left her bunk as quietly as she could, watching her brother in the bottom bed snore lightly as he slept on his stomach.

After going to the bathroom, she was disappointed to find a completely empty kitchen and thought about waking Nat or Tony for a company to the market when she heard footsteps in the living room.

You opened the door making some noise, because the key got stuck in the doorknob.

"Shit." You muttered to yourself, struggling a bit to unhook the item. Wanda stepped into the kitchen doorway, hands in front of her body, and you jumped slightly when she wished you good morning half uncertainly. But your surprise gave way to a smile the next second. "Zdravo! (Hello) Sorry about the noise!"

Wanda shook her head, smiling as well. "Don't worry, you're Y/N, right? Carol's sister."

You raise an eyebrow at her, a charming smile playing on your lips. Wanda hates it. Hates how gorgeous you look right now, the twist in her stomach. She swallows dryly, and you lean on the door.

"She mentioned me, huh?" you ask. "Or maybe you asked."

Wanda's cheeks flush, and she grimaces to disguise it. "She mentioned it." She assures you with a half-trembling voice, which seems to amuse you. "Anyway, do you know where I can find food in this place? I'm starving."

You chuckle lightly, tossing the door key on the small table next to you and reaching out to grab your wallet from there and another set of keys from the support, which has a keychain that Wanda recognizes as belonging to Carol.

"Of course, princess, we'll find food for you." You say, and Wanda knows she is blushing at the nickname, but follows you anyway, just like the first night. And outside, walking side by side toward Carol's truck, you extend your hand to her. "I'm Y/N Danvers, by the way. We haven't officially introduced ourselves."

Wanda shakes your hand. "I'm-"

"Wanda Maximoff." You complete with a small smile, still holding her hand. "And I asked about it."

Wanda pulls her hand away before you realize that she is shaking.

You get in the car first, whistling lightly as you start the truck. Wanda tries to play it cool, keeping her arms crossed the whole way to the market. It's not far, but it seems like every minute drags.

"Did you get home safely after that day?" Your sudden question surprises her a little. Wanda frowns until she remembers what you are talking about.

"Hmm, yeah." She answers. "Someone else gave me a ride home." She says with a small smile.

You don't take your eyes off the road. "You lied to me, Maximoff." You comment then, to which Wanda looks at you with confusion. A small smile plays on her lips. "You are not part of the Avengers. You snuck into an event of ours, I could have ended up in trouble..."

"Hey, you're the one who practically kidnapped me from Tony's party!" Wanda defends herself. "And you asked if I was his friend, which I am, not if I was part of his group of protesters!"

You laugh, shaking your head. "Relax, I'm just messing with you." You comment, but Wanda can only give a nervous laugh because you give her thigh a gentle squeeze and she forgets how to breathe. The touch fades away at the same speed as it happened, your hands returning to the steering wheel, but Wanda's skin is still prickling. "I asked Carol about the mystery girl and she told me you weren't part of the group, but you were trustworthy and welcome in everything. So relax."

Wanda smiles half proudly, glad that Carol trusts her so much even though they are not so close. You cross a green light, and at the next turn, you find the supermarket parking lot.

Whatever this conversation means, it completely improves the atmosphere between you, making the interaction very light and fun. Wanda is unfamiliar at first - Pietro would recognize that Wanda had a shy and alert nature even better than she did. He would constantly tease her about being too self-conscious, and in need of relaxing, and would surely be surprised to see her laugh as easily as she is doing now.

You picked up a shopping cart and seemed to have made it your morning mission to make her laugh as you sort through the groceries. You did little dances with the objects, threw bad jokes and flirtations at her, and even told loose facts as if you were close friends.

Wanda now knew that you lived in a shared apartment with Carol and two other girls and that you could speak Sokovian fluently. You were not a vegetarian even though you tried about three times, and you couldn't have pets even though you really wanted a cat because your roommates were allergic. And you could sing Lorde.

"She's so dramatic, I love it." You declare as the music starts on the speakers in the marketplace. You and Wanda are in the pasta aisle, and she giggles softly. "She's like a Taylor Swift of lesbians, but more alternative."

Wanda chuckles, soft anxiety rising in her stomach. She follows you down the hallway. "But there's a theory that Taylor Swift likes girls too, you know?"

You chuckle, shrugging. "Yeah, I've heard of it. But I think I prefer the ones who actually came out. Nothing against Taylor, of course, she's a great artist. I just won't refer to her as a queer icon when she's never really taken her place in the community."

Wanda bites her tongue, the question about your sexuality on the tip. Would it be weird to question whether you liked girls in the middle of pasta hall? And why would that make a difference to her?

Your cell phone vibrates, and as soon as you read the notification, you huff softly. Wanda is curious to know what it is, but you put the device away and hurry up the pace. "Come on, Maximoff, our friends are hungry too."

You are distant on the way back, and Wanda twists the fabric of her shorts in curiosity as to why.

Luckily, you accompany her to the kitchen with the groceries.

The guys in the cabin are waking up a bit, but the space is small enough that no one will bother you two with breakfast, even if the living room fills up with teenagers.

"Can you make the coffee while I prepare sandwiches for us?" You ask so gently that Wanda doesn't even hear the question properly, and only nods in agreement. She moves around, trying not to touch you - which is practically impossible in that small space - but you don't seem to notice much, busy with bread and cheese. "You're not a vegetarian, are you Maximoff? I was going to put some ham on this."

"I'm not, you can follow your recipe." Wanda retorts with a small smile, a curious look at the double sandwiches you are preparing. She bites her lip when you catch her looking and offers her a wink before returning to the task.

Carol appears in the kitchen doorway next.

"Good morning, cuties. Got any coffee?" She asks. Wanda denies it with her head.

"It's not ready yet."

Carol yawns, moving closer to look at the market bags you have brought. She chuckles then. "Jesus, Y/N, did you buy anything healthy?" You shrug, indifferent to the question. Carol sighs. "You know you have half the soccer team here, right?"

"If they're bothered they buy their own food." You retort impolitely. Carol rolls her eyes.

"Don't be rude; you know you should eat better too-"

"Sure, Mom." You cut her off, turning your back on her to hand Wanda her sandwich. "Here you go, princess."

The brunette smiles half-heartedly at the nickname in Carol's presence, but the blonde only sighs in defeat at the argument and doesn't even seem to notice. She leaves the kitchen, and you stare at Wanda expectantly. She smiles shyly before taking a bite of the sandwich and is surprised at how good it tastes.

"Wow, what did you put in here?"

You chuckle. "Chef's secret." You joke, wrinkling your nose in an adorable way as you pick up your sandwich. You eat together for a moment until the kettle beeps and Wanda leaves the rest of the sandwich on the countertop to finish the coffee.

"Did you like it?" you ask as she pours the drink. Wanda smiles.

"Yeah, quite a bit." She assures you. "Too bad it's a chef's secret, I'd love to learn how to make it."

You chuckle, finishing chewing your piece before clarifying:

"Well, it's a family recipe. That's why it's a secret. You'd have to be part Danvers to earn the legal right to know the ingredients." You joke, getting a soft chuckle from Wanda. You stare at her, almost fascinated. "What about you? Don't you have any family traditions?"

Wanda is thoughtful for a moment, an expression on her face that you would describe as adorable to say the least. And then she gives a small laugh.

"I think so." She says, pouring a mug. "Mom always prepares Šišky on birthdays. I think it looks like American doughnuts."

"Yummy." You murmur causing me to smile in agreement. "And when is your birthday?"

Wanda is surprised but smiles, "February 10th." She answers and watches you pull your cell phone out of your pocket at the same minute.

"Well, let me save the date then." You comment, putting her birth date into the calendar app with the greatest tranquility in the world. Wanda thinks she is blushing.

"What about your...?"

But her question goes unanswered because a tall boy appears in the kitchen doorway. It's Peter Parker, another of Tony's classmates who is on the soccer team. He stretches out gently and you put your cell phone away, placing your snack away on the counter to greet him.

"Good morning, sleepyhead." You say, and it is so affectionate that Wanda swallows dry. He chuckles sleepily, moving closer. Wanda's heart stops when he kisses you on the mouth. "Did you sleep well?"

He mumbles in agreement, shrugging before looking at Wanda and wishing her good morning.

"What's for breakfast?" He asks.

"Food." You retort amusedly, making him chuckle and roll his eyes.

"Okay, smarty pants." He grumbles, yawning a little. "Clearly you didn't buy anything healthy, you know Steve's gonna give you a hard time for that, right?"

You shrug, letting him hug your waist. "I'm terrified." You comment wryly, making Peter laugh.

Wanda feels sick. He kisses your cheek again, and she clears her throat. She grabs the coffee mug, and barely manages to force a smile before practically running out of the kitchen.

The rest of the folks are gradually waking up, and when Wanda is on the porch drinking coffee, Vision comes over to greet her.

"You're Wanda, right? Tony told me about you."

He is gentle, and he is good-looking. And Wanda remembers Peter Parker kissing you in the kitchen, so she smiles and asks Vision to sit with her. It's exactly as it should be, she convinces herself.

–//–

Ponedeljek, 14:30 (Monday, 2.40 am)

Whatever Wanda expected from this holiday, she was not prepared for anything that actually happened.

On Saturday, everyone played paintball between the cabins. Vision was her partner. He was a good player, but you hit him on the top of his helmet two minutes into the game.

You looked Wanda in the eye but didn't shoot her, disappearing between the cabins the next minute. She kept thinking about this interaction all day.

On Sunday, the gang went outside to play soccer and it was a real mess. Wanda was discreetly watching you play, annoyed at the line her thoughts took with the image of you sweating and panting, but she had no choice but to stay outside because Carol and Natasha were making out in her bedroom. She wasn't sure when they happened again, but she wasn't surprised that she missed it, having been too busy the whole holiday trying not to pay attention to you.

When it was finally time to leave, and everyone was finishing cleaning the cabin in pairs, Wanda caught you and Peter fighting outside when she went to put some bottles out for recycling.

"I don't need a babysitter, Parker!" You angrily declared, gesturing a little.

"I'm just taking care of you-"

"I'm not a fucking child!"

Peter rolls his eyes. "No, but you act like one." He accuses annoyed, and you chuckle humorlessly, crossing your arms. He sighs in defeat, raising a hand to your arm but you pull away from the touch. "Okay, whatever. Go chill out, then we'll talk."

He walks off angrily into the cabin through the kitchen entrance, and Wanda makes a noise so as not to startle you.

You run a hand across your face, forcing a smile before approaching her, "Let me help you with this." You say, taking the case of beers from her hand without waiting for a response. Wanda swallows dryly, but decides to follow your cue, and picks up another box further away before following you to the recyclable trash cans.

You place one box next to the other on top of Carol's open truck, in the intention of separating the bottles and cans. Wanda takes a risk:

"Is everything okay between you and Peter?"

You chuckle weakly, grabbing two bottles from the pile.

"Sure, just a silly argument." You mutter moving away to put the bottles in the correct garbage can. "He's sweet, but he's still a man."

Wanda frowns. "What do you mean?"

You short, shrugging; "You've never had a boyfriend?" You ask, and Wanda denies it with her head. You sigh, searching for the right words. "Well, boys can be... obnoxious." You comment with a short laugh. "It's just, they're different. How they treat us, how they act with us and with other people. Peter is really sweet when he's with me, but when he's around his friends he's a jerk and kind of controlling. And by god, don't even get me started when it's around my father... Fucking treating me like I'm something he owns just to please the old man."

Wanda separates a few bottles, thoughtful towards your statements. "I'm sorry."

You hum, shrugging. "Okay, it's not really our fault that society is patriarchal and sexist. It's going to take Peter some time to break the norms and act decently, but I'm under no obligation whatsoever to deal with it."

Wanda swallows dryly. "D-did you broke up with him?"

You look at her with surprise. "No? I meant that I don't have to take pity on him. If he acts like an idiot, we'll fight. And if he doesn't change, then we'll break up."

The brunette tries to hide her disappointment with a hum of understanding. You look at her curiously.

"You and Vision seem to be getting along well."

She forces a chuckle, nodding. She grabs more bottles and runs away from your gaze as she replies, "I guess so."

"Is he your boyfriend now or what?"

Wanda laughs nervously, shaking her head. "No, not really."

"He seems interested in changing that." You insist, studying her reactions. Wanda swallows dryly, putting away other bottles.

"I think so." She murmurs. You hum almost angry all of a sudden - Wanda jumps when you mash a can with a hard punch - and she swallows dryly before raising her gaze to you again. "Do you think...I should accept? If he asks."

You stare at her with an indecipherable expression, biting the inside of your cheek. Wanda almost takes back the question, but you sigh and look away.

"I don't know, you're the one who has to know." You retort with forced casualness. "If you like him, say yes. You were together the whole holiday, I don't see what the problem is."

Wanda stares at the bottles in her hands, her heart racing in her chest.

"Maybe... I was just scared." She murmurs, surprising you. You stare at her expectantly, but Wanda doesn't meet your gaze, her fingers on the bottles. "Maybe I think Vision is likely my only option."

You grimace softly. "What are you talking about?"

Wanda laughs sadly, looking at you. "Like... I don't think there's anyone else to love me. Maybe Vision is my only option, and I just... I'm tired of being alone."

The heartfelt confession takes her by surprise as well. But at this point, Wanda shouldn't be impressed that your presence in her life has come to turn everything upside down at once.

And when you simply step forward, and bring a hand to her face, pulling a lock of hair out of front of her eyes, Wanda thinks you are doing it on purpose.

"Don't you think it's selfish to stick by someone just for convenience, Wanda? Vis has feelings too." The seriousness of your words doesn't do justice to the gentle touch on her face, and Wanda feels a mix of conflicting emotions in her chest.

"Maybe I'm just a bad person." She declares with a sad laugh, but you don't smile.

"I don't think so." You whisper, your thumb caressing her cheek. "I think you are very sweet. And maybe you just need to understand that lots of people love you. And you won't be alone if you say no to a boy you don't like."

Wanda lets out a shuddering breath. "Who says I don't like him?" She teases, her knees going weak as you firm your grip on her cheek and lean in all at once.

Your breath hits her lips, and Wanda closes her eyes, waiting for the impact that doesn't come. You gasp softly, your breath heavy against her cheek.

Your hand leaves her cheek and goes down to a bottle beside you.

You step back a half second before Carol appears in the area where you are standing. Wanda didn't even hear her coming, in fact, she doesn't think she heard much beyond her own heart beating in her ears.

"Aren't you guys done with that yet? Come on people, we have to get on the road soon." Carol repressed, but you forced a laugh at her, muttering something about her being a pain in the ass.

If you noticed how Wanda's hands were shaking as she held the next bottles, you didn't say.

#wanda maximoff x reader #wanda x reader #elizabeth olsen x reader #skamverse collection #alt er love series #yellow curtains #wanda maximoff imagines

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 3 months

Note

AITA for avoiding people because they vape?

🦞<- so i can find this

I (15M) go to a very, very small high school, only 250 people or so. It’s a magnet/early collegetrade type school in Texas, and there’s not many queer kids. I’m a freshman, and at the beginning of the school year I made friends with the only openly queer friend group at the school. I get along with them well enough, though sometimes it’s hard to understand their social ques (i’m autistic). Most people in the friend group are Juniors, and about a week into knowing them they mentioned how they vape, and how three of the guys actually got expelled from they’re local school for several different vape/drug-related issues.

I don’t care if people vape or smoke weed, I think they should have the right to do that, but it’s one of my triggers for several different reasons and being around it makes me uncomfortable. I know that at least one girl, R, can’t go anywhere outside of school without vaping. For this reason I’ve almost never hung out with any of them outside of school.

Around November-December, two things happened that made me want to stop hanging out with them. I went to R’s birthday party, where she immediately got high and then two hours in went upstairs with all the other kids (minus the three freshman there, who weren’t allowed to go upstairs because they didn’t want us to smoke), so i left early. Then, about a week later, my at-the-time boyfriend (we broke up a few days after this for other reasons) told me R gave him and another friend vapes, which means the only other freshman who were in that group also vaped now, and I felt kinda left out.

Another reason I think I might be the asshole is that, since this school is kinda a nerd school, there’s a lot of career networking with teachers and guests and whatnot, and teachers have told classes that they consider people’s groups when judging their moral character. One teacher specifically, who I hate, is in charge of a lot of the student leadership and is very judgmental. I know they look down on the “blue hair stoner” groups, and I feel like hanging out with them would lower my chances (which are already very low since i’m a queer autistic person) of being chosen for financial and social opportunities. It’s not fair but it’s the truth yk?

I had always gotten the vibe that nobody except maybe 3 of those people liked me, and I was naturally starting to make other friends since I wasn’t as socially awkward as the beginning of the semester. I’ve pretty much stopped talking to everyone in that group, minus one guy and making small talk every now and then. R has come up to me several times in the past two months and asked me (jokingly? i can’t tell) if i’ve been avoiding them, and I always just like.. steer around the question. I don’t want her thinking that I’m judging her for vaping/smoking, even tho I think highly of her. I’m trying specifically not to trauma dump in the ask box, but I’m predisposed to addiction in my family and have trauma from other incidents where vapes/weed/drugs etc were involved, and being around them make me physically start shaking.

AMITA for avoiding them?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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pretty-emo-dad · 1 year

Text

Queer rep is like “I’m a girl…. But I like?? A girl >_<“ Meanwhile queer coding is like “I look at her face through her fishnet veil. Is she pissed? I can’t tell because it’s hard to see her expression in the dark. I shrug, smile, but feel my lip jerk to one side.

“Okay. Stressful. School and all.”

She nods at the moon, who would never be stressed out by dumb things like school. I wish she would look at me.

“I missed you.” I say it with feeling. Too much feeling. “I tried to text. I thought maybe you left town or something.”

“Nope, still here. Well, there was that really brief stint with Diego in Paris. He got me this coat.”

“It’s nice.” I say it before I even look at her coat but now that I do, I realize it is a nice coat, a very nice coat, and I’ve never seen her in it before. Probably another spoil from the Warren dumpster but no, it looks too new. It’s got a fur collar. “Is that real fur?”

“Rabbit.” She blows smoke coolly out of her nostrils like a dragon. “He skinned it himself. Don’t look so appalled, Smackie. That’s what they do in Europe. Anyway, it had a good life before he shot it. Lots of tall grass and hopping in the Bois de Boulogne or whatever.”

She grins at me, her eyes shining. “Oh, how was your little sex party thing, by the way?”

“Okay.”

“Cool.”

“I mean, it was super lame,” I add. “I don’t think I’ll be doing that again. Ever.”

She looks at me. “You’re allowed to have fun without me,

you know.”

“I know,” I say. “But I really didn’t. At all.”

She looks at me until I look away.

Silence.

When I look back at her, she’s staring up at the moon, smiling serenely at it like the moon is her new best friend, it’s telling her the most gorgeous things in the world, it would never betray her for some dumb cunts. I could never compare. I shouldn’t try.

“I really missed you this week. I thought maybe you were upset with me.”

“Why would you think that?”

“I don’t know.”

“Because you went to that lame party?”

When she says it aloud like that, it sounds utterly stupid.

“No. I don’t know. Maybe,” I say.

She laughs and shakes her head. “Don’t be an idiot.” She turns back toward the moon. “Unlike your new friends, I’m a grown woman.” “I know.”

“I have my own devices.” She looks down the street as though she’s waiting for a taxi that will arrive and whisk her away any minute now. The street is dark, empty, aside from a few scared-looking undergrads walking quickly down the sidewalk, huddled together, their coiffed heads bent, purse logos shimmering in the dark. Probably venturing toward the one cool bar downtown.

The tango music swells up again.

“We’d better go back inside,” she says and moves to walk in.

“I’m sorry I went,” I blurt out. “I would much rather have hung out with you.” It’s the truth. It’s so the truth I can’t even look at her.

“Do you want me to be mad at you? Is that it?” “No,” I say.

“Because I will be. Samantha, how dare you.” “Ava.”

“Why oh why did you desert me for three hours?”

“Stop it.”

“Do you know I almost died? In fact,” she turns to look at me, “I am dead.” “Don’t.”

“Oh yes. I’m a ghost now, Samantha. I died of a broken heart. I died of grief. It’s in the autopsy. And it’s all your fault. My tombstone reads, Friend Deserted for Evening. I didn’t invite you to the funeral because I figured you wouldn’t care.”

“Ava, please stop—”

She moves in closer. Cups her hands around my face. Her hands are cold and soft and strong through the mesh gloves that grate my skin. She smells like wet leaf, firewood, and green tea. Her hair is platinum feathers brushing my cheeks. Her eyes are runny and scary with makeup, both the brown one and the blue one boring into my skull. We’re swaying slightly like we’re about to dance.

I remember how the first time we came to class, we were late and all the men had been taken. So the teacher said, You two, pair up! Take turns leading.

Are you leading or am I? I asked Ava.

Whatever, she said. We can both lead.

Okay, I said, not knowing what to do. So I sort of followed and led at the same time. She was looking right at me sort of dreamily, happily, like what bliss, what fun, isn’t it? but I didn’t know where to look, so I kept my eyes on a peacock feather earring dangling from her left ear. It felt a little like holding a dream.

I’m staring at that feather now, though this doesn’t feel like a dream.

“Samantha,” she says now, “I don’t care, okay? I really don’t. You want to go to a pretentious party and fraternize with bonobos, I honestly give zero fucks. I don’t care what you do or where you go, okay?”

I feel my breath being knocked out of me. “Okay,” I say. She looks at me.

Tears are suddenly running down my face.

“Smackie,” she says softly.

But I’m walking away, stumbling then running. Even though the night scares me. Even though I hear her calling my name as I walk off into the night. I hear her calling me back, but I don’t turn around. I want to show her I’m not scared. ”

#bunny mona awad #Samantha Mackey #Ava x Samantha #Ava x smackie #wlw #bookblr #queer rep #queer coding #lesbian #bisexual #book recs

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youreternallover · 5 days

Text

Kira Everhart is my MC, also known as ‘Main Character’, for the game “Heart Fragment”. Anyone besides my own characters belong to the creators. I’ve been working on this character for quite some time, as I’ve enjoyed the game severely for a long time and wished to contribute. I hope if anyone decides to read this or know more about my character enjoys their time reading.

𓂃 。◦ ✿ ◦ 。𓂃

Appearance

Kira stands at 5’8 feet tall. They’re comfortable in this height, they don’t want to be taller or shorter, this feels perfect to them. They do wear platformed boots for fun. Their hair goes down to their mid-back. Kira’s hair colour is a softer shade of brown, the name of the colour being ‘Tuscan Red’ when found using the HEX code. They have recently dyed the ends of their hair a soft peach pink in an ombré style, the name of the colour being ‘Pastel Pink’ when found using the HEX code. The images below are the colours of their hair, the base colours as in upcoming art their hair colour may differ due to different shading and so on.

Their skin tone has soft rosey tints to it most commonly, making it warmer. The colour when used HEX code is called ‘Apricot’. The image below is the colour of their skin tone, though it is often darker due to shading and so on, these is just the base colours. I’m going to give two colours for examples.

Kira’s eye colour is a pretty mix of blue and green, giving a nice teal colour. The colour when used the HEX code is called ‘Wintergreen Dream’. The colour is just the base colour for their eyes, many different shades and hues are used when drawing them but this is a good base colour for their eyes. I’m going to give two colours for examples.

They don’t have a main outfit as of right now, but the one I am drawing her currently in may become their main one and so it’s going to be the one I am going to describe. I’ll be using images I have used as references for their outfit, found on Pinterest. They also have a Pinterest board, right here.

Kira wears a black long-sleeved shirt underneath a soft cadet-grey colour cardigan. The clothing articles shown below.

Additionally, they wear high-waisted grey jeans ribboned on the side alongside a pair of black boots. The clothing articles shown below.

Now moving onto accessories. Kira almost always wears a rose gold ring on their thumb, to mess around with when in stress or feeling anxiety. Another accessory they almost wear every day is a star shaped necklaces, personally one of their favourites.

Alongside these current accessories, they also wear a belt and some fingerless gloves with the outfit.

Depending on what route I write them with, and the face originally I made them in the thought of Kay’s route, they wear the necklace given to her. Though I might add it as an Easter egg if I write or draw them with Clive, just for funsies.

That’s currently it for the appearance, I may have forgotten some stuff and if I do remember I’ll just update this. But as of right now, that’s it.

𓂃 。◦ ✿ ◦ 。𓂃

INFORMATION

Kira goes by They/She and is a Panromantic Demisexual Demiwoman, although they aren’t out to many people.

They only started dyeing their hair due to feeling down for a handful of weeks, thinking that maybe if they added something brighter or more colourful would help them feel less gloomy or depressed. Currently, they are letting the colour fade out.

When they were younger, around 14 to 16, she did get bullied in their school for quite some time. Though when their friends found out, the bullying quickly stopped as the teacher and principal was informed. Though the bullying wasn’t too bad, it still impacted them and is one of the main reasons she doesn’t have many friends and doesn’t want to make new friends.

She had developed a crush on Shannon over the years when they were younger, but they pushed those feelings away. Kira didn’t have many queer figures in their life that could reassure them that it’s fine, and they thought that Shannon would never see them that way. After a year, her feelings for Shannon faded and they still remain best friends to this day.

It took a lot of time for Kira to accept their identity and sexuality, like mentioned before, they didn’t grow up with many queer figures in their life, plus they couldn’t talk to their father about it since at that time they still believed he hated them. Only after three years did they accept who they were, though having come out to a very small group of people.

During those difficult times, getting stabbed and all, she was upset when she found out her father treated Kay more like his child more than he did his own child. But in the end, they were glad that Grey looked out and cared for Kay.

Originally, Kira was paired to be with Kay, but after many playthroughs and journeys I decided I’d also pair them with Clive. Her ship name with Kay was ‘Mending Heart’ and is now shared with Clive until I find a good ship name for them and Clive. I’ll be switching around writing for which ever pairing I prefer at that moment.

For the longest time, they genuinely believed that Grey hated them or perhaps wished he didn’t have a kid, or at least didn’t have a kid like her. It started when she first was taken in by Grey, and that feeling stayed throughout the years even if it didn’t seem that bad now that she thought about it. During current times, their relationship with their father is much better and she started calling him ‘dad’ again.

Even after everything has been settled, Kira still has a fear of Jasper coming back. It got pretty bad but with some appointments with their therapist, they’re getting over it slowly.

They never really looked for love, they always thought that looking for love was pointless and that they’d rather let it happen naturally than seek it out.

Kira has a matching bracelet with Shannon, although they don’t wear it they keep it in a little box in their room.

More often than not, Kira wears long fingerless gloves with her outfits. They’re pretty self conscious of their arms for no specific reason. They are so self conscious about their whole body in general, always having some sort of jacket with them.

Once during a thunderstorm, they ran to their friends house because they weren’t doing well even when told not to. They are too stubborn. Kira was soaked head to toe but she made it there and made sure her friend was fine.

They don’t have a stable music taste, it all depends on their mood. Most commonly listens to Heart Fragment though. The band got them through many hard times.

Kira has a small star and moon charm attached to their phone case. They’ve started using StarxSocial more often despite being hesitant to try it out at first. Now they post songs from their music playlists or some art they create.

They were absolutely shattered when they had to choose between saving either Kay, Clive or Jasper. It wasn’t fair. Why should she be the one to decide who lives? They all deserve a chance at life. Even Jasper. Sure, he tried to kill them, but it’s not exactly his fault. He believes it’s destiny. They hated having to choose and wished desperately that they could save them all.

At some point during the whole situation, they believed that if they hadn’t existed none of this would have happened. She wished she never existed. She had wished that for years, but never as much as she did right then.

Kira enjoys music, as seen for their love for bands, and had been singing during their music classes in school when they were younger. They were pretty good at it, playing a guitar along side their singing, but after some time they quit. There were too many eyes on them while they sung, it was too stressful. They also felt that they weren’t that good at it. They still sing to this day, though very rarely and only if their friend convinced them or when she’s purely alone.

They draw a lot. Growing up, Kira always wanted be an artist, always channeling their feelings while growing up into art. Whether it was writing, singing or drawing. Currently, they wish to pursue drawing and painting as a career.

They enjoy reading and have a small collection of various books going. Most of the books in her collection are Fantasy, Thriller or Romance books.

Kira absolutely despises coconut water or coconut flavoured things. Will die on the inside when given anything coconut but to not hurt someone’s feelings they will try their best to eat or drink it.

Their nickname for the longest time had been Kiki when she was small, due to it being a ‘cutsey’ nickname for a child growing up. They absolutely despise it nowadays, due to it being embarrassing.

They hate the fact that they’re a mutant, they still haven’t accepted themselves and the fact that they aren’t normal. They’ve thought of themselves as a freak upon finding out that all that talk of powers wasn’t crazy talk.

Their favourites colours are Purple, Blue and Red. Any shade of them.

Kira’s birthday is on the 19th of October, which means they’re a Libra. Their birthstones are Opal and Pink Tourmaline.

They also have a playlist I created for them, it’s a mix of things they’d listen to or that remind me of them. (link)

#🌔 eclipse’s original characters #original character #heart fragment #I’ll draw them eventually I swear #I just have exams soon so i can’t rn #I’m nervous to post this but here goes nothing #I’m aware the grammar might suck #this was pretty rushed #Kira Everhart #oc #mc #main character #for fun #idk what to tag this as

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