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oliversrarebooks · 5 months

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The Rare Bookseller Part 36: Alexander's Desire

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June 1905

TW: mind control, captivity, human auction

Lex was bored.

He was surrounded by vampires all dolled up in their best attire, eager to see and be seen at the most high-end auction in the entire region, and he could hardly bring himself to care. All of the chatter was petty politics and gossip and who-is-wearing-what and who-is-buying-what, and it was hard to feign the slightest bit of interest.

Still, he did need a thrall. His long-time thrall Edmund had died of old age and blood loss after a lifetime of service. He'd been a good thrall, quiet and obedient, and his presence had eased some of Lex's loneliness. His loss was felt keenly. He knew that a good portion of the vampires here, even those who loved their human pets and servants, would scoff at the depths of Lex's grief over a mere thrall. Lex had always had too soft a heart, a fact that his sire never hesitated to remind him of.

Even so, the grief stung whenever he allowed himself to feel it -- whenever he had need to venture into the cold, spotless kitchen or start up the fire himself. He no longer had anyone to read particularly interesting passages of books to or play music for. There was no more wry chuckle when Lex made a mistake. No one to accompany him to the opera or ballet.

He'd hastily skipped the cattle pen of mind-wiped humans -- he found the entire idea distasteful, their vacant eyes unsettling -- in favor of perusing those designated as servants. Every one had bowed politely to him, addressed him as Mr. Alexander, and answered his questions briefly and with civility. Each one had been so enthralled as to lose most of whatever personality they might've had, and it might take years to draw any of it out of them, like it had with Edmund. The fashion of the time, unfortunately.

But his need for fresh blood couldn't be denied any longer, and even though these humans were unappealing in demeanor, his mouth still watered at the smell. At this rate, all he could do was pick out the most promising of the lot, take them home, and hope to coax some life out of them.

How tedious.

How very, very lonely.

There was, of course, one wild card, one wrench in the machine: his sire-sister, Lily, who had pulled him aside earlier that night to tell him about a secret project she had, a thrall that Lex would just love. That was mildly terrifying, coming from her -- Lex shuddered to think what she'd done to the poor human. Lily's skills in conditioning were second to none, but her ideas of what made a good thrall often ran counter to the grain.

He took his polite leave from the sixth vampire who'd stopped him in the hall, eager to curry favor with him and thereby curry favor with his sire, and headed into an ornately-decorated side room.

There, in the center of the room, stood a man with short blond hair, a stunning red velvet ball gown, and a cocky grin on his face. The thrall looked Lex up and down, and his grin only grew wider.

Lily was standing to his side, wearing some frilly pink confection of a dress. "This is the vampire I wanted you to meet, Fitz."

"Oh, this is Mr. Alexander?" said Fitz. "You didn't tell me he looked like this, sir. I might need to take back what I said about not wanting to serve a vampire."

"This is my special project, Lex," said Lily, bursting with pride.

"The special-est, sir."

"Lex, meet Fitz."

"Charmed, sir, both literally and figuratively," said Fitz, bowing with a little flourish.

Lex stood there, stunned, not knowing quite how to react. "Are you... have you actually been... what I mean to say is, are you a thrall?"

"I've been hypnotized to hell and back by Miss Lily here, if that's what you mean, sir," he said. "But for better or worse, she's allowed me to retain my sparkling wit."

"Is that so?" Lex glanced over at Lily, who was looking incredibly smug. He had to hand it to her: this thrall at least wasn't boring. He couldn't remember the last time he'd seen such life in the eyes of a thrall.

"But enough about me, sir," said Fitz, getting into Lex's personal space. He smelled like lavender and rich, delicious blood, and that confident smile paired with sparkling blue-gray eyes was undeniably handsome. "Let's talk about you. Specifically, why you should buy me."

"Isn't that also about you?"

"You got me there, sir." Fitz laughed.

"Why would you even want me to buy you?" said Lex. "You seem to have your mind intact. You know that you'd be my servant, you'd lose your freedom, and I'd drink your blood."

"I don't know if you noticed, sir, but that's going to happen to every human here, or so I'm told. If I'm going to be a servant and delicious meal anyway, I might as well pick my poison, right? And you seem at least to be a very attractive poison."

Lex had seen thralls fawn and beg before, but he hadn't ever seen a thrall openly flirt. It was nakedly manipulative, of course, but the fact that the thrall was even capable of manipulation was intriguing.

"What are your interests, Fitz?" said Lex.

"The stage is my passion, I'm proficient in magic tricks, passable at fortunetelling, excellent at cards, and dabble in all sorts of arts and crafts and handiwork, sir."

"Do you play any instruments?"

"The guitar and the piano, sir, although I wouldn't expect concert-quality performances."

Lex couldn't help but smile. A thrall that played music, and had his mind together enough to indulge in hobbies! He'd longed for a thrall like this ever since he'd buried poor Edmund. Despite himself, he was already losing himself in a daydream of Fitz in his music room, playing a simple tune on his guitar, filling his bleak and lonely mansion with song.

He shook himself out of it. He couldn't give away his interest too obviously.

"Hmm, let's see," he said, hooking a finger under Fitz's chin and directing him to look him in the eye. His blood smelled like a delectable feast, and it was eroding Lex's self-control. He couldn't hold back his vampiric aura, and he saw Fitz's eyes go wide under his influence. Oh, that was gorgeous. "If I were to buy you, would you offer your blood to me?"

"Yes, yes, sir," he said, now looking more like a dazed thrall, tilting his head to the side to expose his neck. Lex had found this fawning behavior uninteresting from the other, more heavily conditioned thralls -- but on Fitz, who just moments before had been bright and alert, it was intoxicating. "Being fed on by a vampire exactly like you is all I can think about lately. Drink, please."

Lex realized that he was far, far too blood-starved to rationally deal with this kind of temptation. He released Fitz from the spell, seconds away from losing himself and biting into merchandise that wasn't his. Yet, came the automatic thought, which he tried to dismiss.

Life returned to Fitz. "You deserve to drink from someone with blood as good as mine, sir."

"Oh?" Lex cocked an eyebrow. "How do you even know that your blood tastes good?"

"Well, a serious looking man in a very dapper suit told me that my blood was top shelf triple-A fancy grade, sir," said Fitz. "He seemed very authoritative, so I'm inclined to believe him utterly."

Lex laughed. It was probably the first time he'd laughed since Edmund died.

Oh, he was in trouble. This wasn't a thrall he would settle for because he needed fresh blood to live. He wanted this thrall. And he didn't like wanting anything -- it was a recipe for disappointment and disaster. And Lily was grinning like a loon. She knew.

"You're going to cost me a lot of money, aren't you?" he said in defeat.

"You're certainly not the first person to say that to me, sir."

Well, it wasn't like money was a serious obstacle to him. While this style of lucid thrall wouldn't appeal to some of the vampires here, the fact that Fitz had the highest graded blood Lex had seen at a local auction would drive his price sky-high regardless of his personality. And unfortunately, Lex already knew that he was willing to pay just about any price for this one. The thought of another vampire buying him, dragging him away by his handcuffs, sinking their fangs into what was rightfully his --

No, this was ridiculous. He had to keep his calm until the auction proper.

"I -- I really should -- I should take my leave and peruse the rest of the merchandise," said Lex as casually as he could muster, as though he hadn't already looked over most of the available thralls and found them lacking.

"Well, you're certainly not going to find anything better than me, but I understand the impulse," said Fitz. "I hope to see you again, sir."

Lex rushed out before he could get drawn back in.

He stalked down the hallway, past chattering vampires, hoping to find a relatively secluded place to clear his head, finally settling on a padded bench in a small windowless nook. His head was spinning with the desire to possess. He'd been starving for both fresh blood and companionship ever since Edmund's death, and still nothing else had sparked the flame of need so deep inside him as this one particular thrall. His mind was filled with fantasy of Fitz playing guitar and singing in the music room, of Lex stroking his fingers through his hair while they lounged by the fire, of how his sparkling eyes would look when Lex enthralled him to feed...

And the way Fitz had entreated him to feed! That was all Lily's deep conditioning, of course, but it seemed so real coming from him, as though his need for a vampire's fangs was genuine. He'd always known Lily was a genius at enthrallment, but Fitz had to be her finest work yet.

Lex tensed at the sound of approaching footsteps, not eager to make pleasantries with yet another respectable vampire, gushing over some empty-eyed, mumbling thrall and asking Lex to convey their respects to his hated sire. He was relieved to look up and find that the sensible black shoes in his line of vision belonged to his old friend Ruth, one of the sharpest minds in the city.

"Good evening, Lex," she said, sitting on the other end of the bench. "I do hope I'm not interrupting some important brooding."

"You're not interrupting anything in particular. The distraction will do me some good."

"So are you not finding anything you like? That's a bit surprising given how long you've gone without a thrall."

"On the contrary, I may have found something I like too much," he admitted, perhaps unwisely. Ruth was also close friends with Lily, and Lily was bound to be entirely too self-satisfied over her little project's success.

"Ah, is it Lily's little pet? He's quite interesting, isn't he? I think I may bid on him. He'd make an excellent clerk."

Lex couldn't keep the half-horrified, half-ferocious look off his face, his baser instincts howling at the idea of having his new toy taken away from him. Ruth cackled. "What's that face? Don't worry, I'm only teasing you. I won't stand in your way -- you're obviously in need of a proper thrall. Or an improper one, as the case may be."

The jealous knot in Lex's chest loosened. He needed to calm himself before the auction proper, lest he make a scene like an unschooled fledgeling. "I appreciate it," he said.

Ruth put a sympathetic hand on his shoulder. "It's actually quite a relief to see you desire a thrall again. The strict repression your sire tries to enforce isn't good for you. After all, what's the point of dragging these old corpses around if we can't even enjoy ourselves?"

Enjoy himself?

When was the last time he'd truly enjoyed himself? Before Edmund's death, certainly, in the times when his manor had been less lonely, and he'd had quality blood to drink. Even then, it was difficult for him to grasp more than fleeting moments of contentment -- his master's pursuit of perfection over happiness had its roots deep in his mind. Truly, he'd been denying himself for so long, and in so many ways.

He wanted this. He needed this. He was going to own Fitz, and no vampire would stand in his way.

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I'm sure this will all turn out fine.

@d-cs @latenightcupsofcoffee @thecyrulik @dismemberment-on-a-tuesday-night @wanderinggoblin @whumpyourdamnpears @only-shadows-dwell-where-we-are @pressedpenn @pigeonwhumps @amusedmuralist @xx-adam-xx @ivycloak @irregular-book @whumpsoda @mj-or-say10 @pokemaniacgemini @whumpshaped @whumpsday @morning-star-whump @shinyotachi @silly-scroimblo-skrunkl @steh-lar-uh-nuhs @pirefyrelight @theauthorintraining @whump-me-all-night-long @anonfromcanada @typewrittenfangs @tessellated-sunl1ght @cleverinsidejoke @abirbable @ichorousambrosia @a-formless-entity @gobbo-king @writinggremlin @the-agency-archives @just-a-whumping-racoon-with-wifi @enigmawriteswhump @foresttheblep

#whump #whump writing #vampire #mind control #captivity #vampire whumper #rare bookseller #alexander #fitz

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deconstructthesoup · 5 months

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Fantasy High Adventure Time AU

And I am back at it again with the self-indulgent nonsense...

Okay, so, yeah, this started with my post where I noticed the stark similarities between Marceline and Fig. Which, of course, sent my ADHD brain spiraling, and I decided to actually COMMIT to this.

Also, fair warning, this isn't gonna be neat and organized like my others, this is just gonna be *wall of incoherent text*. If I could draw, this would be entertaining, but, uh... YEP!

*clears throat*

So... Fabian and Kristen are the only two humans living in Ooo, and while they both arrived on its shores in different circumstances, the two of them were both taken in by a goblin family who'd left the goblin kingdom and taken up residence in one of the destroyed cities. Eventually, the two set off on their own, along with their adoptive brother Riz, to pursue a life of adventure and heroism just outside of the Candy Kingdom.

All of them have pretty different motives for going into the hero business, though it mostly comes back to just wanting to stick with each other. Fabian's in it for the adrenaline rushes and the glory, Riz is in it for the detective skills and putting bad guys away, and Kristen's just in it to help others out. Riz is, of course, the braincell amongst the three of them, and he's usually there on the sidelines rubbing the bridge of his nose while his siblings are getting themselves tangled in romantic subplots.

The three of them mostly answer to Adaine, aka Princess Buttercream---a girl who was mutated into a candy person after nearly dying in the aftermath of the Great Mushroom War, and has since built herself a kingdom dedicated to peace, learning, science, magic, and sweets. She's incredibly intelligent (and, unlike Bonnie, actually has a lot of interest in magic) and a very capable ruler, but she does occasionally get herself into scrapes---so, it's a good thing she's got three intrepid heroes watching her back.

Not too far away from where Fabian, Kristen, and Riz live is the Thistlespring residence, where their friend Gorgug lives---a shy half-giant who has a passion for tinkering and dreams of adventuring, but is held back by his fear of his giant fury taking him over. The heroes still visit him constantly and encourage him to try as best as he can, eventually giving him the confidence he needs to start making his own path---and to finally ask out the girl he likes.

Another close friend of the heroes is Figeroth the Demon Queen, a devil-may-care rock star with powers that come straight from the Nightosphere. She, too, remembers what life was like before the Great Mushroom War, but she doesn't really think back on it as much as she maybe should. Fig and Adaine are best friends, and have been since they met in the wastelands of the ruined planet... though their relationship's been a little bit strained as of late, mostly due to Fig's long-ago breakup with the former princess of the Fire Kingdom and the current librarian of Wizard City. Adaine's been trying to get them back together, and while Fig and Ayda are talking again... there's still a while to go.

The Candy Kingdom is constantly under attack by the Ice Queen, who at the start of the story just appears to be a wicked witch who plans on imprisoning Adaine and taking over Ooo... a witch that, unfortunately, Fabian has a bit of a thing for. But after some digging, Fabian, Kristen, and Riz find out that the Ice Queen is actually Adaine's older sister Aelwyn, who's been driven mad by a crown that their father had uncovered in the days of the Mushroom War. Aelwyn has forgotten almost everything---including her best friend and girlfriend, Sam Nightingale---but she still dimly remembers her connection to Adaine, even if Adaine was too young to fully remember her. (Oh, yeah, also, Aelwyn's, like, twelve years older than her in this.)

This is all I really have so far, though I've got a couple other snippets---Ragh also starts out as an antagonist but grows into a solid ally and Fabian's love interest, Tracker and Jawbone are part of a group of werewolves who are descended from some of the original humans, Ostentasia is an LSP equivalent---but, yeah, this is all I can get out right now.

...I gotta go to bed.

#dimension 20 #fantasy high #adventure time #fabian seacaster #kristen applebees #riz gukgak #fig faeth #gorgug thistlespring #adaine abernant #aelwyn abernant #this is self-indulgent #can you tell that i've been rewatching adventure time?#fantasy high adventure time au

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apathetic-pixel-42 · 5 months

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hey, i just came across your blog, and i’m so happy to see someone writing about shaman king! i’d like to request a headcanon about first meeting the shaman king boys. thank you so much and keep up the good work <3

Hello!! Thank you for the request!! This is my first ever one, so I hope this meets your standards!! <333

Shaman King Boys React to Meeting Reader For The First Time ✨

Includes: Yoh, Hororhoro, Ren, Lyserg, Chocolove, and Hao

Yoh:

Based on the situation, I believe his reaction would be different.

If you met him during the beginning shaman fights or during the tournament, I think he'd been in awe at your abilities.

No matter how strange your shamanic abilities may seem, so long as your not actively trying to murder anyone, he'd except you no matter what.

Even if him and Anna weren't engaged, you'd probably still face a lot of skepticism from her. She'd obviously be wary of you, but you two would probably grow close after a while.

Obviously, he wouldn't fall head over heels immediately. To me, Yoh is someone who would need to see different sides of you before ever trusting you fully.

Once the two of you were close, he'd absolutely be more open to hanging out one on one and getting to know you better.

Now, if you were to have met him during school or childhood, things would probably be different.

As a child, I think he'd be a lot more eager to hang out with you. After all, he didn't have any friends and only hung out with Tamao and his family.

He'd probably be more willing to approach you and develop a genuine friendship with you.

Despite how hectic his situation is, he'd definitely appreciate having you by his side.

Overall, he'd be eager to get to know you and develop a genuine bond with you.

Horohoro:

Now, for Horohoro, his reaction to meeting you would depend on a lot of factors.

Unlike Yoh, Horohoro is not the most accepting. If anything about you seems suspicious to him, he would definitely be cold to you initially.

He'd especially be cold to you if you're on Hao's team. Unlike Yoh, who would probably try to look past this and give you a chance, Horohoro would immediately be hostile towards you.

Another factor you'd have to consider is your personality. For example, if your personality was somewhat similar to Ren's, he'd totally be iffy around you.

On the other hand, if your personality was like Yoh's or Lady Jane's, he'd probably be more open to letting you hang out with him.

Once he was comfortable around you, I think he'd actually try to make some kind of effort to get to know you.

Of course, he'd be kind of awkward and standoffish, but it gets better the more time passes.

Now, if you two met as kids, it'd be a lot more difficult to get to know him.

Similar to his relationship with Kororo, he'd attempt to push you away in the beginning. He wouldn't want you to get close to him, so it'd take a lot of time and persistence to get through to him.

Unfortunately, you'd have to deal with his self conscious and spiteful episodes. It would be difficult and sometimes he'd say things he didn't mean, but he'd always try to make it up to you.

Overall, he's another person who'd be super grateful to have you around and would wholeheartedly cherish having you in his life.

Ren:

Ren is one of the people whose relationship with you would depend on when exactly you met him, but let's say you met him after he matured and stopped killing.

Even at this point, I think Ren would still be a bit hostile right out the bat.

Unless he met you through Yoh or someone in the group, he'd have no respect for you.

Of course, it would be different if he considered you a formidable opponent. He'd probably have a decent amount of respect for you and your fighting style, but I still doubt that he'd get close to you.

Assuming you two had never met before, it would take a VERY long time for him to trust and get comfortable with you.

However, it would be different if he met you in the past.

Let's say that you met him through his sister or something like that, since I doubt that his dad would take kindly to your presence otherwise.

Although younger and not exactly mature, I feel like it'd be a lot easier to build a relationship.

Yes, the relationship might not exactly be the healthiest, but I think he'd put up with you if you obey him.

Honestly, it's just far more preferable to meet him later on. I think this is because even if you guys were childhood friends, who's to say he (or maybe his dad?) wouldn't outright kill you over some kind of mistake?

In summary, I think he'd actually be a loyal friend...just not as a child. If you're willing to put in the work to get to know him and spend time with him, he'd remember and cherish it.

Lyserg:

Lyserg is another one of the boys where it would kinda depend on when you met him.

Let's say you met him before he joined the X-Laws. I think he'd definitely be a lot more open minded about meeting you.

He wouldn't judge you, unless you were openly/actively associating with Hao.

It'd be a lot easier to get along with him, plus I think he'd be more open about letting you get close to him.

Now, let's say you met him around the time when he first joined X-Laws.

At the height of Lyserg being sucked up in his mission of getting revenge, he'd definitely be a lot more of a challenge.

I also think that he may attempt to drop you as a friend, if you two were friends beforehand. Unless you persist on being by his side, he'd try to push you away.

Even if he did want to stay close to you, you'd have to go through Marco and all the other X-Laws.

I do think that he'd be a sweet guy in the beginning, but it really does depend on the timing. I personally didn't like Lyserg when he first joined X-Laws, but it definitely got better as the show went on.

Even though he had his rough patches, he'd still be polite and sweet towards you.

Overall, a great guy to meet, but it depends on what point you meet him.

Chocolove:

Joco, to me, would be the easiest to get along with.

He's very openminded and accepting, especially given his past. He wouldn't judge you for any of your faults and could potentially relate to you.

Now, if you were one of Hao's goons, he'd definitely be more on edge. However, if you're not outwardly hostile or anything, he'd possibly be willing to give you a chance.

Besides Yoh, he'd be one of the friendliest ones out of the group.

He's incredibly understanding, but he's also someone who seems eager to make friends and connections.

Of course, he'd probably be wary of you given the circumstances of the tournament, but he'd still be super fun and engaging.

I feel like you'd most likely meet him through a fight or by laughing at one of his jokes.

After a few conversations, I think he'd enjoy hanging out with you. Of course, you wouldn't get anything serious or deep out of him, but he would definitely be sweet.

Even when he becomes blind, I don't think that would affect how he would treat you.

Overall, his energy and easy going personality would make it pretty easy to get to know him. Given that his beliefs are based on rehabilitation and acceptance, he'd be more willing to give you a chance compared to the others.

10/10 friend and would probably be your best bet besides Yoh.

Hao:

Easily the worst one to meet if he didn't like you.

Assuming that you were at least associated with Yoh's group and unknown to him, he'd be interested as to who you were.

You'd have to be super careful with your thoughts around him, but he'd also be interested in the kind of mindset/opinions you have.

Even if you stayed away from him, it'd only make him more curious. He'd pop up spontaneously, which is probably how you two met in the first place.

Now, let's say you were one of his minions. Whatever situation you were in before doesn't matter to him, he'd still approach you out of curiosity.

Originally, he would just manipulate you to get you to join. Even if you did resist him at first, it's honestly inevitable.

At first, he'd pay minimal attention to you. However, after a while with you hanging around, he'd slowly grow closer to you.

Of course, it'd be incredibly discreet. He can't let the others know that he has favorites or any sort of weaknesses.

He'd meet you secretly in both scenarios, unless he wants to mess with Yoh's group. You're interesting to him, no matter if he can read your thoughts or not.

Overall, he's entertaining if he likes you. He'll let you hang around him as much as you want, just make sure not to bring awareness to anything... suspicious.

Just be careful not to piss him off, because he really doesn't want to waste his mana on consuming your soul.

#shaman king x reader #hao asakura x reader #horohoro x reader #yoh asakura x reader #lyserg diethel x reader #chocolove mcdonald x reader #ren tao x reader #headcannons

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dollywheeler · 11 months

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September 16th, 1996

Dear diary,

Nothing much happened today, but I felt like journalling so I'm just going to anyway.

During fourth period art, I tried to restart the art assignment with the adjustments I wanted to make. I'd practiced over the weekend, so the actual drawing of the hand and tear went very smoothly and I was happy with how it looked - even the fingers and nails - so I could just relax and listen to the music as I tried to work on the wallpaper. I don't remember if the wallpaper had a pattern, but the drawing would be too empty otherwise and I think it adds more depth and drama, and makes it more clear that it's a wall to begin with.

Plus, I found a picture in the basement of Mike and Will in Will's old bedroom, with its old boat and train wallpaper, so I wanted to incorporate that. It tells more of a story in my opinion, makes the drawing feel more juvenile or childish. Innocent. Simple fleur-de-lis or something similar would have been too old-fashioned and cliché. I like the childlike essence - especially because it comes from a childhood dream - and the added difficulty of consistently drawing the trains and ships. I've never drawn something like that before so it's a bit of challenge, but exciting nonetheless.

I was practicing the trains when Will, who'd been stalking through the classroom and talking to students that needed help or advice, stopped by my table.

"Hey!" he said with a bright voice, a sense of pleasant surprise in his tone. But it wasn't the drawing he was looking at, but my arm. "Where did you find that?

Realizing he was talking about my bracelet, I smiled and held it up for him to see better. "Oh, it's Nancy's. I found it in the basement."

He smiled but shook his head, reaching out to trace his fingers over the beads. "It's Mike's actually. We made it sometime in elementary school. I have the one Mike made me in an old shoe box somewhere. Pretty sure it's older than you are."

"Oh," I said, staring dumbly at the bracelet. It felt strange to be wearing it all of a sudden - both because it's Mike's, and it felt different being tied to him than Nancy, who at least tries to be a sister. And because it wouldn't surprise me if Mike cared more about this bracelet than me.

Mike has always been a sentimental person, hard to let go of things, though he doesn't seem to have the same problem when it comes to letting go of people. Will has always ranked higher on his list than me, because he was there first, which means this bracelet probably does too - both for having belonged to his life longer than I have, and because Will made it for him. And by virtue of it being a 'thing' rather than 'people', which makes it low maintenance.

"Sorry." I said, already scrambling to take it off. "I can give it back," I offered, but he chuckled and held up his hand to stop me.

"Nah, don't worry about it. I think it looks great on you." He said and sounded genuine. "Might have to hide it from Mike though as he'll probably fight you for it once he sees it."

At first my stomach dropped at the confirmation of my earlier thought, by someone who knows Mike better than me, but then the thought of hiding it from him, of denying him his bracelet, made me smile. Will's eyes gleamed as if he'd caught my train of thought, as if it was what he'd intended all along - their little secret, an enabled rebellion.

And yet, his expression fell more serious as he lowered his voice, reminding me that we were in a class full of people.

"May I ask, Holz? Why you're upset with him?"

"I'm not." I lied, because being upset means you care, and I won't give Mike the satisfaction. I'm not delusional enough not to notice that on some level I do, but it is the way it is. My only problem now is that he's putting my face in it every single day.

Will nodded though he didn't seem happy with my answer. I knew he wasn't going to let it go just quite yet, so I quickly redirected his attention by pulling out my drawing and asking if he could help me with the lighting.

Instead of reluctantly following my change of subject, as I'd expected him to do, he froze, staring at my drawing. He shook himself out of it in only a second, but I still caught it - a moment of recognition as his eyes slid over the charcoal. Which, now I think about it, was strange because I hadn't even added his wallpaper yet so it couldn't have been that.

He just looked at it for a moment before looking over at me - again that same look his mother had over the previous weekend, which was strangely uncanny. As if I was a child admiring bloodsplatter, unaware of the world, unaware of anything.

Will seemed more concerned than his mother had though, which was definitely an accomplishment, as he asked where I'd seen this. I thought it was a strange question - I've seen him drawing dragons before, surely he hadn't seen those in real life - but I just shrugged and explained the dream thing. He seemed more at ease after, though there was still this unnerved air to him, as if I'd just dodged a bullet.

He distractedly gave me some advice about the lighting - good advice, still, mind you - before leaving me to it and moving on to talk to Jessica Kernel. It was definitely strange, but I didn't have much time to ask anything else, anyway, because the bell rang, releasing us for lunch.

It was still on my mind when I got to our usual table, but Daniel joined us today and sat down next to me so it quickly left my thoughts after that. Jackson and Ben were with him, and for some reason Jackson immediately turned to me with this inquisitive look, sly as he asked about Mike. He sounded like he was trying to be subtle, but it was anything but - it was clear he'd singled me out to ask about this in particular.

He said something about seeing "your brother and Mr. Byers" - which is still weird btw, having people refer to them as such - at the supermarket over the weekend, and then mentioned Nadine seeing them arrive at school in the same car.

I didn't understand what he was getting at so I just shrugged and gave him a confused look for pointing out the obvious, making it clear I could tell he was trying to gossip and didn't approve. "Yeah, they live together. It's not a secret."

"They do?" Dylan asked, frowning as if it was a shame they hadn't found the loves of their lives yet. She's always been a romantic, so the thought of not having found your person at 25 sounds like torture to her. I can't say I disagree.

I explained they'd known each other for 20 years and that they were both single so it just made sense. I didn't mention that I'd had no stake in the conversation that preceded this idea, or that I actually had no idea what their reasoning was other than my own assumptions. Not their business, as it clearly isn't mine either.

When I looked at Jackson again, he'd seemed disappointed with the information he'd gained - it was definitely less intriguing or scandalous or whatever than he'd hoped. Honestly, I don't know why he would have been interested in the first place, what he'd thought to have discovered.

Good, because he is such an asshole sometimes that anything that doesn't go as he wants it to is probably the better option. I'm glad Daniel only hangs out with him because of basketball - I wouldn't have liked what it says about him if they'd actually been friends. Then again, if they were, I doubt I would have liked Daniel to begin with.

Daniel and I talked for the rest of lunch period and I can tell he's warming up to me. He takes more initiative and is more comfortable in conversation. Whenever we talk about something that interests him his eyes just light up and it's like he lets more of his personality show than he otherwise would. I really didn't think I could like him more than I already did, but he keeps surprising me. I never knew liking anyone could be so thrilling. It's like I'm always itching to learn more.

I'm thinking of going to the diner after school tomorrow so I can see him. I know he has to work, but I just like being in his presence, and if I have to do homework I might as well get something out of it.

Speaking of, I should probably get back to it.

Love, Holly

#holly wheeler #mike wheeler #the third wheeler #fanfic #stranger things #byler #will byers

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six-eyed-samurai · 1 month

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Short (okay, not very short) yaps on Demon Slayer characters as actors in modern day.

KAMABOKO SQUAD

TANJIRO is a child actor thanks to his father's fame in his role in Hinokami Kagura III who mostly just played cameos until he landed his role in the series Demon Slayer. Same like canon Tanjiro he's quite the sunshine boy, the sort who'd buy Starbucks for everyone on set and donate at least 60% of his income to charity. His social media is usually more of photos with his siblings or friends on set than actual movie advertising. After the series ended of course he chose to take the iconic green and black checkered haori.

NEZUKO too is a child actor alongside her brother but received a few more important roles due to her cuteness factor, like the mob boss's daughter or the orphaned girl. Has joined a few musicals before with her amazingly sweet singing but ultimately decided she preferred just acting. However Demon Slayer was her first major role; Nezuko likes to take off the bamboo muzzle and pretend to snap at the camera in the bloopers. Tabloids have been gossiping about her and Agatsuma after being spotted at a park together.

INOSUKE was originally just a prodigy break dancer at the studio his single mom Kotoha and grandmother worked at, thanks to his extraordinary flexibility. His first roles were just dancers in musicals but never actually spoke or sang - he was a little self conscious about how deep and scratchy his voice sounded and how oddly feminine his face was, until Ubuyashiki Movies scouted him out formerly to be a demon, but after watching his audition decided he was perfect for the role of the Beast Breathing Slayer. Off screen Inosuke is still a messy eater but surprisingly his language is pretty refined and not so blunt and brutish.

ZENITSU first auditioned for the remake of Lightning, the movie his grandfather Jigoro played a side role in, hoping to impress a girl, but unluckily and luckily he shockingly scored the role and lost the girl. Kaigaku, his already famous foster brother, wasn't too happy about it, especially when they ended up Lightning's sequel, Thunder. Later on he joined the Demon Slayer series - Zenitsu was a little put off at having to bleach his hair but after Nezuko said he looked cool he became a little too eager about it. Real life Zenitsu is still obsessed with girls, something the magazines make a headline of every time.

KANAO played minor roles unlike her sisters, due to her shyness and fear she wouldn't be as expressive. When the other two Kocho girls joined Demon Slayer she decided to audition for a background slayer, but when the director Kagaya saw her ability to play the super silent swordswoman to perfection she was cast at once. Not as obsessed with coins as she is on screen, Kanao still did have to have Tanjiro make the first move. The only pictures she has online are usually blurry back ones or with her face scribbled out.

GENYA is no stranger to the screen as he often plays a small role in his elder brother's gangster shows. His first show was Windbreaker and when they needed someone to play Sanemi's left hand man his brother immediately pushed him to sign up; with his deep voice and build he was quickly cast. Genya liked the Mohawk he has to get from that show so much he made it his trademark style, although some directors decided to not fast him after he refused to grow it out. Off screen of Demon Slayer, he apologizes a lot for the yelling and is still really shy around girls.

HASHIRA

RENGOKU is a very renowned actor, his father being a notable name in the movie world, but not really for his movie - more for the numerous bloopers of the directors having to retake a scene because he couldn't stop himself from laughing out loud. He's the sort who would personally respond to fans and boisterously gets along with everyone on set with a slap on the back and yelled encouragement. Just like his character he's very vocal about his thoughts, although after he picked up the habit of yelling 'UMAI!' everybody started sitting a little further away during meals. Was very excited to have the signature red and yellow hair and was slightly disappointed to find out he would be wearing a wig instead. Could not take the fight scene with Akaza seriously at all and to this day Tengen and him still act out his death scene in front of reporters.

GIYUU started learning to act under the famed but retired drama teacher Urokondaki. He is rather quiet compared to the other actors on set but he's definitely surprisingly more sociable and alive; his complete 180 in personality always startles everyone else. Because he usually gets a smaller role compared to Sabito and Makomo, everyone including him was shocked when he landed the role of the Water Pillar. More than once has stolen the director's megaphone to bark orders like "Hit it like you mean it! Call yourself a slayer?!" at the actors. In the water effects of his scenes, you can be sure he and Sabito are running around using the hoses and sprays to squirt at everyone - Shinobu really gets into character when she gets hit.

TENGEN is so famous for so many things it's hard to start: his flamboyance, his good looks and three wives. Not surprisingly he always gets the main roles in movies like Nine Shinobi. However underneath his flashy exterior Tengen has been cut off from his wealthy father's fortune who opted to give it to his younger brother due to their disapproval of him pursuing a career in the silver screens. Tengen being "angry" in the Demon Slayer scenes was honestly just realistic because he was dying from laughter - yelling and turning red is surprisingly easy like that. Sometimes in public Suma, Makio and Hinatsuru will yell "Tengen-sama!" and cling to him in order to embarrass him but to their annoyance he plays along.

MITSURI is definitely a fan favorite amongst all and every gender for her bubbly, exuberant personality and pretty looks. Real life Mitsuri isn't as giggly as the characters in every love drama series she plays, but definitely her pursuit in romance was inspired by those on screen. She's very supportive in her siblings career in acting too, even if they're just playing supporting child roles for now. Mitsuri hasn't found Mr. Right yet though, due to many people simply wanting to date her for her fame or money - although rumours are going around of chemistry between her and one fellow Pillar actor on the set of Demon Slayer.

SHINOBU started acting background roles in Kanae's movies, until Ubuyashiki Movies realized her snarky personality fit the Insect Pillar a little too well - especially with her rather intimidating smile reserved for the press. Off screen Shinobu is more playful than actual cutting, sarcastic remarks, but boy do you not want to get on her bad side - once an obsessive fan started stalking Kanae and Shinobu publicly cussed him out so bad in an interview the whole thing had to be censored. On the set of Demon Slayer she enjoys whacking people who forgot their lines with the flat of her blade.

OBANAI is one of the most mysterious celebrities as off screen literally no one can identify him anywhere, even if his only disguise is wearing a black face mask. He's pretty famous for his roles in crime or mystery films, so Demon Slayer was a surprise for everyone. His makeup is pretty excessive even compared to those like the demons, and often times they had to redo zoom in shots because he's blinking too much. Ironically Obanai was previously mildly afraid of snakes but after acting with Kaburamaru he decided to adopt the lil' fella and take him back home along with the haori. His acting with Mitsuri was not faked: he really is whipped for the actress from the start.

GYOMEI is the most unserious of the lot off screen, and it got worse when he got the blind Pillar's part, frequently walking up to people and saying really bad jokes like "how do I look? I can't see for myself". One of the oldest actors on set, a lot of people look up to Gyomei for acting tips and support due to his long experience in all sorts of genres and movies. People who hadn't seen his previous films and only know him as the blind character will be taken advantage of - he simply stares in the wrong direction and acts like he can't see the nosy reporter attempting to stick the mic up his immense height.

MUICHIRO was actually cast because of how popular he was as a child actor; together with his twin Yuichiro they played all sorts of roles from the identical ghosts in horror movies to the child hero with a power of splitting himself in two. Many fans sent letter after letter or voted on social media that he should play the foggy headed Mist Pillar. It took a while since he had to grow out his hair and dye it, but when he finally made his appearance everyone went feral. Muichiro has photobombed so many scenes and photos blowing raspberries to the point it's everywhere in the bloopers. He actually cried when Yuichiro "died" because no one told him it would be shot that gruesomely - his reaction was a 100% genuinely real.

SANEMI had done a lot of makeup and sacrificed a lot of things for his roles in every mafia movie where he'd always be cast as the mad dog: bleach his hair white, paint on scars, go on a diet and crazy workout plan to get those muscles, but having to shave his eyebrows took the cake. The first video of Demon Slayer wasn't the trailer - it was the video of him recording it. Off screen Sanemi isn't that screamy or hot tempered; that's just for show in interviews or reporters. His social media is spammed with photos of him and Genya or other actors on set. An excellent (albeit pestering) wingman, he even carried Obanai on his shoulders so that he could be tall enough to kabedon Mitsuri in a viral video.

DEMONS

KOKUSHIBO was a star from the start, usually taking the same roles as his twin Yoriichi. But in the end he got tired of being in his brother's shadow and have everyone confuse them for only one Tsugikuni so he joined Samurai of the Moon alone and that was how he made his name on screen. Contrary to his parts Kokushibo is pretty verbal and sarcastic. The few times he appreciates having a twin is when he can let Yoriichi deal with the fans who think there's only one of them and slip away unnoticed with just sunglasses as his disguise. Was very supportive when Muichiro and Yuichiro began acting but secretly worried they would encounter the same problem as him.

DOUMA was famous from the moment he was born because of his actor parents' infamous divorce. He only really rose to fame after his acting in Eternal Paradise, a movie about a cannibal pretending to be a cultist. Douma is pretty flirty even off screen (causing Kibutsuji Productions to threaten to fire him several times if he made another scandal, especially around Shinobu Kocho) but if his lines require him to say anything inappropriate about women on screen he actually is pretty apologetic about it afterwards...in a carefree manner, of course. His favourite part of his costume is the rainbow irises and wears it even in interviews - some people actually believe those ARE his eyes.

AKAZA was just an ordinary martial arts student until Kibutsuji Productions came looking for someone able to act and attack in their mobster movie Three. Many of his photos include him with his signature tattoos, but they're actually fake; only his reddish pink hair is not. Starred alongside Rengoku in a sitcom Donuts about two rival chefs and Basketball Flame about a wannabe player. Both were delighted to work together in Demon Slayer but he hasn't stopped harassing Rengoku about becoming a demon yet. Akaza refuses to do any intimate scenes with other women that aren't his fiancée Koyuki so they had to hire her.

HANTENGU is an actor famous for his role in The Old Tell No Lies and his skill to cry and sob on demand until his untimely end from a concussion at a failed stunt. Thankfully his grandsons the quadruplets and Zohakuten are still continuing his legacy, moving quickly from the greatly watched Clones to the up and coming Demon Slayer. No one's figured out their secret to acting is simply because they're really bickering amongst themselves. Not acting.

GYOKKO is someone not so much famous for his roles than his flashiness in fashion at every year's Kizuki Gala with eye popping makeup and designer clothes. He enjoys pottery in his free time and some of the pieces you see on set are actually his own works. Since he isn't a fish in real life, in Demon Slayer he's mainly voice acting while the body is CGI. He actually gets along pretty well with the Tokito twins, taking them out for meals sometimes but honestly, they couldn't have possibly taken his eyeshadow, right?

GYUTARO in his humble beginnings was just a stunt double in heavy makeup for action movies, because of his skill and complete fearlessness and was too afraid of auditioning independently due to his insecurities about his birthmarks and face. He started as a double for the main character in Poison Sickle, but when Kibutsuji Productions heard his voice and saw his attitude they decided to completely just cast him as the main character, a hardened apocalypse survivor of coarse language attempting to kill all who gets in his way with his sickle. He played it so realistically although Daki encouraged him at first even she was honestly a little freaked.

DAKI was like Nezuko although scoring bigger roles. Her prettiness managed to land her in many movies, although nothing major until her playing in the princess-assassin movie Warabihime secured a role for her in Demon Slayer. Off screen, Daki isn't as insulting or biased on beauty, getting along with the other girls on set pretty well and insisting Gyutaro pay for whatever crazy shopping spree they had gone on. She loves to do her own makeup, so good they don't even need to hire an artist for her. Daki won't join a movie if Gyutaro isn't in it too or acting at the same time.

ENMU isn't as delusional and obsessive as the characters he enjoys playing on screen, but he does often like to mess with others on set by proclaiming he'd love to die by their hand or offering his blood. Newspapers enjoy speculating why he has always refused to take any other method of transportation save trains but the real reason is that he's really filming another movie alongside Demon Slayer, the thriller Subway. Nonetheless Enmu's social media, despite his publicist's frustrations, is spammed with pictures of trains. He's mentioned in an interview he likes his character's haircut in Demon Slayer so much he's considering keeping it.

RUI too is a child actor, but he mostly plays the sickly child in advertisements or hospitals due to his weirdly pale skin. Rui's odd fascination with arachnids (something his fans are crazy over) began after he landed a main role in Spider Family, which was why with his parents' encouragement he auditioned to play of the minor demons on Mt. Natagumo but much to their delight he instead go the lead. He likes to play around with the other actors and more than once anyone caught napping will wake to Rui's makeup scheme plastered on their faces.

#sanzuyaps #demon slayer #kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer au #kny au #actor au #hashira #kny ubuyashiki #kibutsuji kny #twelve kizuki #upper moons #lower moons #demonslayer #modern au

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thedo0zyslider · 2 months

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Reunited - Chapter Two: Old Hobbies - 2K Words

Fwhip has another hard day, and spends it remembering things he wishes he still had.

A03 Link

One day, Fwhip gets an old urge to make something again. It really shouldn't shock him, when it happens. He was an inventor at his core, and always had been his whole life. It's been six months since he even saw a workbench, let alone sat at one and actually made something new, or chipped away at a new project. The urge to create after all this time is only a natural thing, and he knows that. But that doesn't mean he has to like the urge.

He even sits down at his desk, in the workshop he had. Well, the work room Gem said he could have, the one right across the hall from her own little spell room or whatever she called it. Fwhip hadn’t used the space for its intended purpose at all though, treating one side as an office of sorts; with papers and half finished sketches piled onto a desk. The other was treated like his own personal library, with two bookshelves full of god knows what books crammed in there. The place was also full of whatever he'd managed to save from the manner, most of that stuff being together on one shelf. Like they were too precious to be contaminated by any of the other, newer things lying around the home.

It takes him a few minutes of sitting at his desk, of looking around for a spare tool or pen, to even realize what he’s trying to do. He’s just running on old habits, doing things that had long been committed to muscle memory during long hours in his forge and workshop. It was just like he was back home, in the Grimlands, getting ready to start a new project for the empire. It was just like the good ole days….

When Fwhip does realize what he’s doing, the realization hits him hard. Very hard. Enough to render the former count motionless for a few seconds, staring at the wood of his new desk blankly. The wood of his new desk, not the well loved and charred one of his old one back in his workshop. His workshop, the one right down the hall from the meeting room and his bedroom he never slept in. Not right next to his sister’s own workspace in a small house they built with their own two (mostly Gem’s uninjured) hands, but a manor that had been his childhood home for generations. His home that was gone because of him.

The ginger makes a strangled noise, grumbles to himself, and stops looking around his desk for a stupid pen or wrench of whatever. Instead he folds his hands over themselves, fingers tight with tension he didn’t even know he had left in him, and just….lets them rest there. He didn’t used to do that, before the explosion and his injuries. The half dragon had never let himself rest, he used to always be fidgeting, always going going going. Now he could just sit still for a while, and not feel the need to move at all. (Take that ADHD, or whatever undiagnosed neurological thing he probably had.)

His gaze, now somber, shifts to the window. It’s not even a minute till his eyes are trained on the river, one as blue and full of life as his own gaze used to be; once upon a time. It was the main reason he, Gem, and the villagers they had with them had settled here, because it was a good source of water, one they could filter for drinking and fish and water the crops from and swim in. It’s his favorite spot to look at, whenever he needs to stare out the window and think. Or when he needs to take a lonesome walk. For a lot of reason; because it’s pretty, it reminds him of the one back home, and of…..a certain someone Fwhip takes a lot of care to name nowadays, lest it bring the choking guilt and sense of failure back into his throat.

He feels like the biggest failure in the goddamn world, that's what he feels like. And it's a fitting feeling too, considering he'd been the one who'd ended it. Fwhip’s the one who had the idea, to make that new dumb Codfather’s head, who’s forge blew up and destroyed everything and killed people. All of that, that was all him. All the blood was on his hands.

It was a plain and simple fact, in the half dragon’s mind at least. He failed. He failed his friends, his family, his kingdom, everyone. Fwhip had failed all of them, and there was nothing he could do to change if. There was no way he could go back in time and undo everything, save everyone, even if he wanted to. Even if he wanted to more than anything in the world. Or well, what's left of the world anyways.

It was his fault the Grimlands was nothing but a pile of rubble. It was his fault the Ocean and the swamps had drained. It was his fault the Mezalean Matreal Palace had been split in half. It was his fault debris had fallen and destroyed the Crystal Cliffs Academy. It was his fault all the other empires had been sent ablaze. It was his fault all their friends and all those innocent people had died. It was all Fwhip’s fault, no matter which way you viewed it. All of it was his and his alone.

A frown becomes firmly etched on his face, as Fwhip sits there for whoever knows how long and thinks. He thinks about home, all the things he lost in the explosions and the fire. The memories and the lives and all his staff and his friends and his people and Clara . He thinks about the other empires and emperors too, the ones missing, the ones alive and the ones they knew were dead. The ones they knew were dead because they’d had to find out through what little gossip and hearsay they got. Because at the end of the day he and Gem had run, and hadn’t gone to pick up anyone else. They hadn’t even checked if they were bodies to bury or any people to save, just packed up what was left of their things and got on her dragons. And cried, they’d cried a lot. It was selfish of them, both of the twins knew, but they hadn’t known what else to do at the time. Fwhip wishes they hadn’t done that, but that was in the past. There’s nothing they can do now. All they can do is take care of themselves, and the people that have been found along the way, and just try and survive.

Fwhips holds back a sound or two, a wet sob maybe, and rests his forehead against his folded hands. There’s a lot of grief choking his chest today, a lot of regrets too. And the pain, the pain that was present in his legs and the phantom ones that never left his backside for long. Today is a very painful day, on both the emotional and physical fronts. He hates those days. But couldn’t help it when they happened; even if they and how useless they made him feel annoyed him to no end. Mental illness was a bitch, or whatever Gem said.

When he removes his head from his hands, he’s composed again, the best he can be, and biting down on his tongue in an effort to keep his sad little dragon sounds back. Worst part about being a hybrid that was, your body is moving and making sounds based on your emotions and not what your brain wants them to do. Though he was missing all of the limbs that could do that now. The involuntary little half dragon sounds were still unaffected, very unfortunately. The explosion couldn't even take away the inconvenient things, because of course it couldn’t.

Fwhip lifts his head again, all that grief and sadness and pain pushed down for now. Hopefully for the rest of the day too, if he’s lucky; because they wore him out and he’s sick of dealing with all that constantly. He lifts his head, eyes fixed back on his beloved little river, and doesn’t hear the footsteps approaching the room, too lost in his own thoughts and reminiscing. He also doesn’t notice the presence at the doorway, even though she watches him for a good few minutes, the world entirely blocked out as Fwhip remembers a happier time; in a different place with a different man he very much would give what’s left of the world to see again, even it would only be for a few precious seconds. He’d give anything, anything at all.

“You’re staring at the river again.” Gem notes from behind him, leaning against his doorway. Her brother jumps at the noise, not having heard her approach. She’s always good at sneaking up on people, much better than his clumsy self had ever been.

“And?” Fwhip asks, not turning to look at her. He keeps his eyes firmly fixed out the window, not wanting to tear them away. Not yet. He also doesn’t want to look at Gem. doesn’t want to see whatever pitying look she’s probably giving him. Probably.

“You need to talk about him, Fwhip.” His sister says, her gaze piercing into his backside. He shifts uncomfortably under it, a frown forming on his face in record time. This isn’t the first time they’ve had this conversation, and it won’t be the last, either. Fwhip knows his sister is just trying to help, help heal and get better, but he really really wishes she would drop the damn topic. He doesn’t like thinking about it and all the pain it brings. “I don’t.” Is all he says, feeling his whole body go stiff with tension. He does need to talk about it, most likely. He knows it would stop him from waking up crying in the night, from dreams and resurfaced memories. But the thought of it feels too large, too much of a task to conquer. So the half dragon doesn’t need to. He’s fine. He’s absolutely fine not talking about it.

“ Yes, you do!” Gem exclaims, throwing her arms up in the air just a bit. The conversation just started and she already sounds exasperated beyond belief. Which means he’s being extra frustrating today, or she walked in here in a sour mood. The ginger thinks it’s a mix of both today. “You need to talk about him instead of just…just moping over it!”

“I’m not moping , I’m just reasonably sad. ” He fires back, glancing over his shoulder just a little bit. If only to throw a glare at his twin, if nothing else. Or a disapproving frown, at the very least.

“You walk around the river aimlessly and looking all dejected.” Gem deadpans, her arms being crossed over her chest. And, even though he wants to, the inventor can’t deny that she has a point. He does do that at least once a week, when things get too heavy and his mind needs to be cleared. Or he just needs to grieve . “That literally fits both definitions of moping!”

“I’ll talk about him later.” Is all he says, starting to turn back to the window again. So he can watch the river again, and then keep watching it for the next few hours. Like he’d been perfectly content to do before he was so rudely interrupted.

Gem sighs, sounding annoyingly exasperated at him. He hates when she sounds like that, he really does. It’s grated on his nerves like nothing else since they were children. Usually because it meant she was being stupidly stubborn and not getting the goddamn hint. (And for all he loved his sister, she could be the most grating woman alive at times. But hey, what were twins for?) “You always say that.”

“Maybe it's because I don’t want to talk about it!” Fwhip snaps, feeling his tail stub twitch when he speaks. If the rest of it was still there, he knew it’d be lashing with annoyance. And maybe his wings would be flaring out in anger too, if they hadn’t been so horribly torn to shreds months ago. He doesn’t want to talk about Jim —about him . It hurts too much, even though it’s been six, almost seven, months, it still hurts too much to talk about. It hurts that he left and went missing , that he’s not here and that Fwhip’s the reason he’s gone —

“Sorry….I’m sorry. For pressing.” Gem sighs, backing down a little easier than she normally might. She even gives him an apologetic look, before moving her own gaze to the wall. “I just want you to be happy again, that’s all.”

Fwhip snorted, his gaze fixed firmly on the river once more. He knows that he’s probably being too harsh right now, but he can’t help it. “Well that’s gonna be pretty damn hard.” His tone was sharp, and ears flattened back. He hadn’t truly been happy in almost a year, and didn't see that changing anytime soon.

“Sorry.” Gem repeats again, a frown in her voice once more. She's no longer leaning against the doorway, now starting to retreat back down the hall. Her voice fading with her footsteps, and the next words called over her shoulder distantly. Good riddance , is all her older brother can really think upon hearing them. Even if it is a bit mean spirited, admittedly. “I’ll go feed the cows now.”

“Yeah. Okay.” Fwhip says over his shoulder, his gaze never moving from the water. Gem can go feed the cows all she wants, like she was probably supposed to be doing right now. She can do whatever the hell she wants for all her twin cares, as long as he’s left alone and isn’t pestered about looking at the river again.

He doesn't need to talk about it.

#SORRY IM POSTING IT AT LIKE 10 PM I WAS BUSYY #ron.writing #ron.fic #reunited #fwhip #geminitay #empireshipping #empires smp #fwhimmy #BUT THEYRE NOT FWHIMMY-ING YET SORRY #empiresfic #big fan of this chapter. much better than the first

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teutonic-titwillow · 11 months

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I've wanted to write about this for a while, because let's face it: Delphine is head-to-head with Nazeem for the prize of Most Hated Skyrim Character.

And yet, and yet, and yet. Does she deserve the hate? Or is she just a victim of poor writing?

Let's talk about Delphine.

Actually, let's imagine a scenario.

Imagine that, in your youth, you dreamed of joining some famous organization. The FBI. The CIA. The Major Leagues. Whatever it is, congratulations: you made it!

Here you are, a fresh-faced recruit. You've been adopted into this new family: and a family it is due to its very nature, because the Blades have an overarching mission as well as their peripheral missions of, effectively, trying to defend the Empire and maintain the peace, and the necessary secrecy and shared sense of purpose creates tight bonds.

Then, one day, a wagon rolls into town, and on it are the rotting heads of your brothers and sisters.

The ones who murdered them throw back the tarp, and they reveal the annihilation of your family, your identity, your mission in life.

Worse yet?

You're next.

You're next. You feel it coming. You see it coming. The bastion of your organization, a fortress everyone thought would never fall, falls. More of your family die, and with each one, a piece of your heart is torn out for good.

You run. You run for your life. It's the only thing you can do. The few of you who are left scatter to the four winds. You don't dare to stay in contact - they'll find you that way. You don't even know who's still alive. You're pretty sure no one is.

You run, alone, hunted, endlessly hunted.

But it gets worse still, because as far as you know, you. Are. It. The entirety of the hopes and dreams and sacred mission of the Blades is ALL ON YOU, because you are, as far as you know, all that's left.

Imagine being that young woman, utterly alone, terrified, fighting for her life in the face of a foe who'd almost taken down an Empire, and to top it all off, bearing the weight of this inutterably heavy responsibility. And you are so absolutely the wrong person to bear this burden. You're a recruit! You don't know the half of what you need to know. You aren't privy to the secrets that guided your Grandmaster.

But you can't put that weight down. If you do, the mission dies, and with it, the world, because the Blades, as you know them, were the last bastion against the end of the world. Against Alduin. The lives of your brothers and sisters were lost for nothing. Their suffering bought your freedom. Their deaths sealed your fate.

It's all on you.

Now fast forward a decade. Two. Three.

You're older. You're tired. So tired. You've spent these years skipping one step ahead of golden-skinned death. Your body is scarred from those encounters. You wish you could lay down this burden, but you can't because there's no one else to take it up. You have no home. No friends. No family. No children. No one to share your secret or your burden with. Can't risk it. The Thalmor might find you and kill them, too. Probably make you watch.

Is it any wonder you see Thalmor in every corner? Is it any wonder you're wary, jaded, paranoid, exhausted, on edge? Is it any wonder you have absolutely zero fucks left to give? The only thing that sustains you any more, through all of this pain and grief and fear, is the mission.

Of course Delphine isn't cuddly. Of course she's paranoid and obsessed. She has lived through absolute hell for thirty years, and she has done it alone.

And sure, she demands that you kill Paarthurnax, but you know what? She's a Blade. The Blades' mission is, in part, to make sure the Dragon Wars never, ever happen again, and dragons are immortal: long after the Last Dragonborn is gone, Paarthurnax will still be there, and there is no guarantee that he'll be able to control his nature forever. The odds are, in fact, against it, and when those odds fall in Nirn's disfavor, there'll be nobody left with the power to stop him.

Why doesn't she let it go, you ask?

Because she can't.

Because it is all she has left - the last thing, the ONLY thing she was able to pull from the burning wreckage of her life. And even if it sears her flesh to the bone, she cannot let it go.

Delphine's not a monster. She's not a fool, either, or she wouldn't have survived this long. She's a tired old warrior who lost everything she loved and then had to crawl through hell, carrying the weight of all of her dead and their centuries-old battle on her back every step of the way.

So let's have a little sympathy for an old warrior. She'll pretend she doesn't care, that she'll do what she has to whether you like it or not, but inside, the pain of the last thirty years bites deep, and the only thing that makes her pain holy is fulfilling her duty to the family she lost all those years ago. And if that didn't come through in her dialogue, don't blame Delphine. Blame Bethesda for forcing you to read between the lines to fully comprehend the shit sandwich Delphine has been eating all this time.

#skyrim #the elder scrolls #delphine #the blades #in defense of delphine

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kitkatt0430 · 1 year

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Want some more rambling about Hartley Rathaway in S9?

Much as I loathe Mark Blaine, I actually really like the way Hartley has been set up as Blaine's foil thus far. I don't know if that'll get maintained, but here's hoping. (Just like I'm hoping for more Hartley and Khione friendship, but Ep3 did not deliver it so I may have to write it myself. *sigh*)

So far we have their similar stories. Hartley lost Roderick to a technobabble coma in the latest retconning of The Sound and the Fury, circa Season 6. And nothing Hartley did was enough to save Roderick, he could only stick him on ice in Mercury Labs (and somehow Tina was cool with this) while going on to apparently be a very good thief who made lots of ill gotten gains and got a reputation amongst Central City's Rogues.

Then Barry promised to help save Roderick in exchange for Hartley helping Barry with his pesky Godspeed clone problem. But Barry failed to help Roderick and Hartley was given a choice. He could keep doing what he was doing, which wouldn't save Roderick. Or he could help Barry with Godspeed, which still wouldn't save Roderick but it was right thing to do. It was something Hartley could do not just for Barry and Team Flash... but for himself. And so Hartley chose to set aside his resentment of Barry and the rest of Team Flash. He chose to save Barry. And in doing so, they discovered the missing ingredient needed to wake up sleeping beauty. Er... Roderick.

Blaine's story is something of an inverse to that. He gave up being the villain because he fell in love with Frost. And I don't want to debate his feelings or say that because he's a selfish asshole he didn't really love her. If he says he loves her, he loves her. But love doesn't always win. It shouldn't always win. Sometimes love isn't a good thing.

Becoming one of the good guys wasn't something Blaine did for himself. He did it because he wanted her. Joining Team Flash meant he could have Frost because she liked him too. But she loved her sister more than she loved him. And I have no doubt that he resented Caitlin for that. So he supported Caitlin's quest to resurrect Frost and it cost Caitlin her life. Instead of recognizing he'd fucked up... he doubled down and tried to take Khione's too. Against her will even, if he has to stuff her back in that stupid box himself. And Hartley stops him.

Hartley, who chose to save a life of someone who'd contributed to Roderick's comatose condition, knowing he'd get nothing out of it... got the miracle of his loved one back in his arms as a result. Mark, who was so blinded by his desire to have Frost back that he helped destroy the person she'd died saving.

The two of them as foils continues through the Rogues of War episode. Mark has probably already joined Red Death's crew by the time Barry and Hartley show up at the bar. Though it also fits that he may have joined up immediately after that scene, but it begs the question of the listening device getting to Barry & Hartley's meetup w/Goldface on time if Mark was having to negotiate with Red Death to get Frost back first. Was there enough time for him to do that and have someone get there ahead of time to bug the alley? *shrug* I guess it depends on how long it took for Barry to set up the meeting with Goldface.

Either way, by the time all the Rogues convene at STAR Labs to plan the heist, Blaine's already become the mole.

He's made a fool's bargain, but he doesn't realize it yet. Red Death doesn't care about saving Frost's life and odds are Blaine will figure this out too late. As it stands, he at least seems to realize he's in over his head and Red Death holds all the cards.

Both Hartley and Blaine are argumentative and kinda assholes to their fellow rogues. But where Blaine is in it for selfish reasons and destabilizing the group, Hartley is seeking new ways to protect his 'team' - Roderick and their employees at the club - and uses the arguing as a way to bring the rogues together by pushing Barry's buttons so they'd have a common adversary (of a sort).

And when Hartley is offered what Blaine presumably had to seek out - a place in Red Death's crew - he turns it down. It says a lot that while Fiddler and Boomerang both fight their opponents without question (well, okay, Fiddler and Jaco stop their fighting for a bit to flirt and it's hilarious), Murmur stops fighting Hartley to give him the choice of joining her side. Specifically it says lot about Hartley's skill as a thief and his reputation prior to settling down the Roderick. He's someone who fights well, even after being out of the game a while. I think Murmur really respects him as an opponent and genuinely hoped he'd do what she saw as the smart choice - join the winning team. Red Death's team.

And Hartley says no. Because he's been down that path and it doesn't lead anywhere he's interested in going anymore. But it's the path that Blaine is currently choosing to walk.

#the flash #season 9 spoilers #fandom meta #the flash meta #hartley rathaway #mark blaine

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mikelwave · 1 month

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1, 2, 5, 10, 11, 12, 13, 16, 19, 21, 23, 25, 28 >:3

1. what song makes you feel better?

Depends on what mood I'm in, but generally a lot of 80s disco songs help me feel better. When I feel lonely I listen to a lot pf Phyrnna stuff, especially slower ones like this and this! I was always weird with music so I never know how to answer this one concretely lol

2. what’s your feel-good movie?

A lot of early Pixar films fit this category, but if I had to name one it'd be Wall-E.

5. who do you feel most you around?

Probably my sister, especially in the last 10 or so years I feel like she's been the only person I could really be truly open with and not worry that whatever I say would get used against me in some way :/

10. what’s something you’re excited for?

I'm really looking forward to World of Goo 2, I haven't been this hyped for a game since the Ace Attorney Chronicles! In general I'm excited to finally be working on a story I had in my mind for almost 10 years as well!

11. what’s your ideal date?

AVGN marathon I'd be really happy to be able to take someone to a place they previously told me they always wanted to go to, but keep it a surprise until we got there. If not that, then just a quiet time enjoying each other's company and not stressing out about daily life.

12. how are you?

I'm actually a lot better! I feel like I really needed to break the cycle I've been in for the last 7-ish years, I feel more in control of my life than I've been in a long time \o/

13. what’s your comfort food?

🍕🍕🍕🍕🍕🍕🍕🍕🍕🍕🍕🍕🍕🍕🍕🍕🍕🍕

16. compliment the person who sent you this number.

Your septum ring looks very handsome today :3

19. most important thing in your life?

This sounds corny as hell but it definitely would be the friends I've made in my late teen to adolescent years, next to that it'd prob be my art!

21. if you could tell your past self one thing, what would it be?

Don't force yourself to fit into groups that didn't care about accepting you in the first place. It's better to be alone than be surrounded by people who'd drop you as soon as you stopped fitting their strict agenda.

23. favorite piece of clothing?

I got this hoodie last fall and it's still my favorite one to wear!

25. what’s the best personal gift someone could give you (playlist, homemade card, etc.)

drawing of an oc of mine or just a character I like is the best gift you could possibly give me, no need to spend money n shit

28. hugs or hand-holding?

def hugs!

ask game

#ask game #duskittycat #big-bee-png

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casketscratch · 2 months

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There is so much happening with my family that any time I try to sit down and put words to it, my brain just stalls. Tires stuck in the mud and going nowhere while you hit the gas kind of feeling.

Content warnings for way too much writing, way too much writing about my own family, grief, child abuse, denial, suicide threats (not mine, just mention of someone else's), cocsa, sorry if I missed any but consider it a dumping ground.

My maternal grandad passed away earlier this year. As my sister put it: my dad sucked, my stepdad sucked, and he was really the only one in the family who you'd call fatherly. I haven't cried about it. I haven't missed him. I haven't felt anything except nothing. Which I also know isn't true, because when I went to see him in the hospital for the last time (knowing it would be the last time), we dissociated so severely in the car on the way home that we split. So there was something there! And now it's gone.

Since he passed, my grandma moved in with my aunt, who couldn't cope. She's... I don't know. I try to be compassionate. I try to be understanding. I know this aunt endured a lot of abuse, and as a kid there was always some crisis revolving around her mental health. Not to be dismissive -- there was a stalker that her mom/my grandma enabled, she was assaulted as a teenager and never got the help she needed, her parents were genuinely neglectful in a lot of ways. My grandma in particular.

I don't really want to get into the weeds about her because it's not the point. The point is that the entire family has suffered for years because she basically sucks the rest of us dry. Even as a little kid, I couldn't ask my family for help or tell them anything because there was always a crisis going on that revolved around her problems.

After a few weeks of living with my grandma, she messaged a bunch of us basically saying that we needed to relocate my grandma for 4 weeks because my aunt needs space to "work on herself." i.e., she's finally taking therapy seriously but only has 4 sessions left because This Fucking Province.

Which... great, because in the lead-up to that e-mail, a lot of us had been talking about learning how to set boundaries as a family, supporting her without constantly rearranging our lives and bankrupting ourselves to pay her rent and bills, about not walking on eggshells because if she gets upset then she'll disappear for hours and vaguepost about suicide. She's in her 50's and it just sets my teeth on edge because I have been catering to her wellbeing my whole life, at my own expense. My sister, too. She had a whole crying breakdown the last time we saw each other because she'd had no room or time to grieve, or take care of her own kids, because she's sort of terrified (I think) that she'll fail to show up for my aunt one day and then be the reason my aunt kills herself. And to some extent I think our entire immediate family acts this way. It's not sustainable anymore.

Which is something I finally expressed to my mom. Whose basement I am living in after having to quit my job, flee the city I was in, etc. You know. Actual crisis, life or death shit. (This is also the aunt who, when I told her I'd been dx'd with DID, thinking she was maybe the one person in the family who'd understand it as someone who's openly lived with CPTSD and talks about it a lot, told me that "just because doctors say you have something, doesn't mean you do" and that was the end of that).

So my grandma is now living with us for four weeks so my aunt can "have space" by entirely upending her grieving mother's life and kicking her out with only a few days notice.

And, like, there is a lot wrapped up in my feelings about my aunt. There's a kind of fucked up survivor's guilt, right? I'm the "good" victim who's "doing the work," it feels like. Somehow I'm more stable despite going through what I did as a kid. Somehow I'm more self-aware and can actually do the work and try to put myself back together. Somehow, somehow, somehow. (It's the DID. Look at us go.)

And there's an endless tug-of-war between trying not to victim blame her, and... just being fucking honest. She's manipulative. She's poisoning the relationships a lot of us worked really hard to heal. No, it's not okay or normal to send us messages about how she's trying to remove some component of her car so she can fill it with exhaust. No, it's not okay to kick your widowed mother out with no notice after committing to living with her and we all pitched in around the clock to make it happen. No, it's not okay to turn around 8 weeks later and reverse course entirely, while trying to talk us into continuing to help pay for a 2 bedroom apartment all to yourself now, or whatever. No matter what happened to her, none of that is okay!

What's gutting me is how much my mom agreed with me, and how hard she's reversed course. I was honest weeks ago, explaining to her that my aunt has always done this -- and my mom... isn't not helping her, but is more invested in helping me. She helped me paint my room last weekend because the wall colours would trigger me so badly that I was dissociating and carving "fix it" into the paint, because they were the same colour as one of the rooms I was y'know, [redacted] in as a kid.

She's recommitted to helping me with therapy and showing up and not leaving me hanging for months. She plainly said that she does not want my aunt to interfere with my recovery, that she's spent HER whole life taking care of her younger sister like this, and can now see the toll it had on her own family/kids, and it's not okay.

I don't know what to do with this. I really don't. Mostly I feel guilty knowing a lot of people in my situation don't get that kind of help, too. My mom was mostly not around when I was a kid because she was in school and working full time -- we were living with this aunt, and my grandparents, so they more or less collectively ignored raised me. My mom truly had no idea about the abuse and trafficking, and has been so helpful this last year. I grew up bitter and angry at her, but a lot of the work early on in my trauma shit was realizing that I was (I am so ashamed to type this for some reason, even if it's kind of just facts) really just brainwashed by my dad's side of the family against her. It's complicated.

So, okay, right? My aunt is a lot, but it's something I spoke to my therapist about, he helped me with boundaries and encouraged me to focus on my own stuff, because my aunt is the sort of person who... no matter how many times you show up, it won't change her. You just keep showing up until you're drained, and she moves on to the next person.

My grandma, on the other fucking hand.

Couldn't be here 48 hours before she was sitting down and bringing up the kids I grew up with. The ones whose parents were also involved in the same trafficking rings. She has no idea; she will never have any idea. She is so, so insistent on seeing only the good in people that it has ruined this family, it feels like. She enabled her daughter's stalker. She defended my mom's rapist/my sister's biodad because there must have been some good in him (he fled the country on suspicion of murder and my sister is working with the RCMP about it, but never mind that part either). She continued to be friends with my stepdad after I told her what he'd done. She chided me for going no contact with my biodad because "he always gave such nice gifts."

She started talking about those kids, anyway. And about how one of them was just a Bad Kid, malicious and evil at 8 years old, or whatever. She would babysit the neighbourhood kids after school, so there were often a bunch of them over at our place. She was talking about how one afternoon someone turned the knobs on the barbecue outside, turning the gas on, and she almost lit a cigarette before smelling it and nearly blew herself up. Clearly on purpose!

My mom interjected to be like, that's just kids playing with knobs and things, and I cut in with... she was a really abused kid at home. She wasn't bad, her family was horrific, and I left it at that. And my grandma?

"Oh, but their house was always so clean, I can't believe that!"

Which mostly felt like I was smacked across the face, and I think Stephan fronted, because I heard myself say something like, "what the fuck does that have to do with anything?" and then it's a lot of fog.

My mom even pointed out how this friend would often have to borrow my pants because she wet herself so often, and how that was a sign of CSA, and it just didn't matter to my grandma. My friend was just "lazy."

Anyway, "It's just so unbelievable" there were so many "bad" kids on that block, what a coincidence! So weird how many of us are addicts now, or just dead, when she was friends with all our parents and they were all the greatest people! Haha, how does that happen!

And I saw in that moment just how impossible it would have been for me to ask for help, let alone get it. Nothing can be wrong around her. She needs the world to be perfect, hunky-dory, everyone is good, and it left so many of us wide open to abuse. My aunt included. Myself included. And I kind of see where my aunt developed her constant crisis mode, because only life or death will get through to my grandma -- and even then, not really.

Like. She has singlehandedly facilitated or enabled abuse of most of her family because she refuses to admit people can be bad (and there's the urge to be like... but she's like that for a reason, and deserves sympathy, and surely that means what she did is understandable, and etc.).

I just foresee myself spending a lot of the next 4 weeks in the basement avoiding all of this because we just started doing the real trauma work in therapy, we just started reconnecting with the rage and processing it, and it's like oh god no shove it all back in the box because our aunt said we have to so our grandma will be taken care of!

Fuck that. She can't make it down the stairs and I have a refuge in that. And my room is painted my favourite colours now, I never want to leave it anyway! (It's a very dark navy blue with deep turquoise on one wall.)

Just. It's a lot. It's a lot, a lot, a lot, and I keep compartmentalizing or forgetting why I'm so tired, and so at my wit's end, and none of these are even my problems to deal with in the first place. Maybe that's callous? Maybe not. But either way she sat on my couch, defended several of my traffickers while I tried to point out that they were in fact abusive people, and doubled down about it, and I really don't feel obligated to cater to that anymore!

I'm kind of really proud of myself for this one, actually? It has taken a LOT to get here.

#have i mentioned how fucking weird it is being both the most broken and most therapized person in this family #like my role here has very much been trying to help teach my family how to deal with my aunt #bc none of us have the resources left to do this for another 50 years #but they're listening and learning and taking it seriously? and i am so grateful for that!#but also wtf

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shieldherostuffs · 2 years

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there are a lot of numbers between 1 and 100 ;A; how about 42

42. Don't Lose Ur Head from Six: The Musical

(Female Naofumi)

When Myne married the young King of another Kingdom, after leaving with her personal servants and assets because her mother wouldn't listen to what she needed(wanted), she thought she'd live the life of her dreams.

And it was, for the first few weeks. Riches and servants at her every disposal, a man who adored her, and a court who could do nothing against her.

Until she found out about his wife. King Motoyasu Kitamura's first wife, and the Queen, Naofumi Iwatani. It was an open secret that Queen Naofumi had been sold off by her parents to be married to Motoyasu, so her younger brother could take the throne of her former kingdom.

It was only a month after her life in the Royal Palace, that Myne found out about Motoyasu's tendencies of visiting brothels and the red districts almost every other night, if not more often.

When Motoyasu had suggested she talk to Naofumi about it when she'd confronted him about it, the two ladies went to tea in the garden together.

Naofumi told her Motoyasu had been doing that since before they even got married, and even went to spend their first night together with another lady, and over time, she just decided to ignore it.

Naofumi's position in the court is too fragile to do anything, as Motoyasu cares nothing for her, the ministers know that Motoyasu doesn't care, and everyone knows she was sold off. She has no backing outside her personal maids.

Despite this, Myne wants the position of Queen. She's petty towards her mother who chose her younger sister as heir over her, and she wants every benefit that comes with the title; riches, servants, lavishments, everything good in life.

So, she starts scheming. She butters up to the servants, ministers, and nobles, and builds herself a great reputation, while simultaneously ruining Naofumi's spreading rumors about her left, right, and center.

Months later, Naofumi's life had been basically ruined, not even able to leave the castle without being scorned and ridiculed.

The rumors had escalated the most, when a few months back, Myne had riled Naofumi up to start shouting at her when Myne threatened her with exposing that she'd been unfaithful when the Queen of Sickle, Therese Alexandrite Sickle, had been visiting for business deals.

Naofumi could do absolutely nothing to retaliate.

Now, months later, Motoyasu finally heard the escalated rumors of Naofumi supposedly beating Myne and abusing her power as Queen. Myne, with everyone on her side, including servants, the royal physician, and the ministers, had Naofumi at trial for treason.

Naofumi was thrown out of the palace together with her personal servants, two young girls saved from lives on the streets, and banned from the capital.

Myne thought it'd be smooth sailing from there.

However, it wasn't. Only a few months later, new rumors started spiraling, this time about Myne; Karma at its finest. The rumors said she was the runaway Princess of Melromarc, Malty Melromarc, who'd abandoned her Kingdom for a life of luxury and laziness, and that she was really the one who was beating and ruining the Former Queen Naofumi's life. Some even said that Queen Naofumi had taken her own life after what happened.

Now, years later, Myne is the one to be on trial for treason and infidelity, this time with actual evidence, and a much harsher sentence.

Beheading.

As she looks out over the crowd, kneeling above them, she locks eyes with a pair of familiar emerald green ones, almost hidden under a hood.

Naofumi is there, hiding and watching and Myn is about to be beheaded, and on each side of her, the King and Queen of Sickle.

Naofumi stared, slowly moving closer to the platform.

Just as the blade is about to fall, Naofumi stands in front of the platform.

A voice calls out-

"ST—"

#malty melromarc #naofumi iwatani #female naofumi #the rising of the shield hero #rising of the shield hero #therufumi #spotify wrapped inspired #royalty au #motoyasu kitamura #does the voice call STOP or START? no one knows :)

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carewyncromwell · 1 year

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17, 20 and 27? ^^

17. Who is MC's heart throb? Why?

LOL, well, at school, Carewyn did nurture a crush on Andre, before she dated him! She not only really admired his talent for flying and fashion, but his confidence and effortless amiability. Carewyn herself may be able to project confidence and has been able to make friends easily enough due to her immense sensitivity toward other people's feelings and needs, but she is not a social butterfly, and when she was younger and still seen as "that delinquent Jacob Cromwell's sister" by most people, she saw this popular Ravenclaw who could effortlessly strike up a conversation with someone and immediately end up their friend and envied that. Plus he was very nice and incredibly generous! Andre always helped his friends in need with fashion emergencies, whether with advice or even by making his own pieces from scratch by hand. Ultimately, though, when Andre did actually ask Carewyn to the Celestial Ball in their fourth year and they started dating, they weren't actually the power couple one would assume. Andre isn't as attuned to people's feelings as Carewyn is, especially if you're not the sort to wear your feelings on your sleeve, and so at times ended up being a bit too blunt or insensitive, and because Carewyn is the type to soldier through and not tell anyone she's hurting, that only bred confusion and resentment. Andre is the sort to wear his emotions on his sleeve, so he wasn't able to pick up on Carewyn's more subtle expressions of her emotional state. To add to the problem, Carewyn had MAJOR trust issues to work through as well, so she simply just had trouble letting down her walls enough to be an equal in a relationship as it was. She was fine with taking care of Andre's problems, as she did her other friends, but she was so focused on looking her best for Andre at all times because of how much she admired him that she would never open up to him about her own problems...so yeah, this person that should've been her rock and shoulder to cry on was never really allowed to be. Finally, their wants and needs in a relationship were honestly just very different. Andre wanted someone who'd be up for playing lots of Quidditch, dressing in lots of pretty clothes, going to lots of parties with him and potentially even having sex -- Carewyn, being ace but not realizing it yet, had no interest in or inclination toward sex and, as mentioned earlier, is no social butterfly. Carewyn needed someone who'd do things and engage in intellectual discussions with her and be able to provide encouragement, stability, and emotional support -- Andre may be able to talk about just about anything, but he's the type to like a loud, flashy lifestyle with lots of travel and his inability to look past Carewyn's stoic mask made him ill-equipped to help support her emotionally. The two broke up in their fifth year and went back to just being friends, and honestly, they've become closer platonically than they even were before, since they understand each other in a way no one else does. And after the Second Wizarding War, Carewyn reconnects and eventually becomes romantic partners with her ex-Captain Orion Amari! (Guess this girl's type is Quidditch players, LMAO!)

27. If MC could be any creature, what would it be and why?

Hmm, Carewyn would honestly prefer to stay a human, if she had a choice. She likes being a witch! But if she had to be a creature, I think she'd pick something that flies -- she's been enamored with flight since she was very little. Carewyn's Animagus form is a robin, so I guess she'd choose that.

And 20 is here!

MC Ask!

#hphm #hphm ask #carewyn cromwell #andre egwu

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beholdthemem · 2 years

Text

Popped back into tumblr to discover that @thestuffedalligator had tagged me to list one favorite character from ten pieces of media- thank you so much! This was such a fun (and unexpectedly challenging, only ONE character from each?? You're killing me here) thing!

1) Reyna Avila Ramirez Arellano from the Percy Jackson books. I loved her from the first chapter she was introduced, and years later I still do. ¡La reina de mi corazon!

2) Eddie Bloomberg/Kid Devil/Red Devil from DC comics. I first encountered this dude at age 11 in a stack of comics somebody had donated to the library, and just kind of imprinted on him- I used to secretly imagine him as like, the big brother I didn't actually have, but desperately wanted. Now matter how bad things sucked, no matter how mean people were, no matter what was going on with him behind the scenes, Eddie always tried his damndest to be the nice, goofy friend that everyone needed while keeping the sinking ship that was the 2003 Titans run together.

Growing older than him was the weirdest thing. 'Oh shit, now I would be his big sister. I would have to, like- drop by the tower all the time to affectionately call him a dipshit, and secretly make sure his teammates weren't being dicks."

3) Syb Rook from NADDPOD's Eldermourne. Their gender is fantasy greaser, their pronouns are they/them/bastard (probably), and they have my undying affection. I love this criminal-with-standards, what-kinda-loser-doesn't-sit-like-A.C.-Slater, multiple-cigars-at-once ass jerk. I miss them so much. Either I need to get wiser about picking plot related favorite characters, or Brian Murphy needs to stop being so good at making side characters to get attached to.

4) Chrissy Cunningham from Stranger Things.

My brave, brave girl.

We saw Chrissy for one episode, and in that time she managed to leave a handprint on my heart the likes of which I have never before experienced. Kudos to her actress, I was living under the impression that I am a stone-cold bitch, and unfortunately it turns out I am NOT. I think what grabbed me most about this girl is that she is silently going through hell, has absolutely nobody she feels that she can safely admit that to, is surrounded by people who love the person they THINK she is and the life they THINK she has, while having never once noticed one real thing about her...

...and she still tries her hardest to be kind.

If she wanted to be a bitch to people, if she wanted to start smashing windows, I would get it. I would probably have done worse in her position. But she doesn't. She's like 'That's my problem, it's nobody else's fault, I don't have the right to take it out on anybody else,' and really tries to back that up. She's genuinely disappointed in herself when she can't remember the name of Eddie's band from six years ago, and makes an effort to try and recall it. When she remembers at last, she's as delighted as Eddie is. She was just... a sweet girl in an awful, lonely situation, and I wanted more than anything to watch her heal from her mother's abuse, recover from her eating disorder, and find people she could be honest with. Who'd be there for her when her family never was.

I would've liked that.

5) Glenda Sugarbean from Discworld, and you CANNOT IMAGINE how hard it was to narrow this down to just one character. What I love about her is that she carries on the grand Pratchett tradition of furiously caring about people when the world hasn't, but unlike Vimes, or Granny Weatherwax, Susan, she has no special power- magical or political- to do it with. All she has is her own two hands, common sense, an unparalleled gift for cookery, and a spine of steel- and she makes it work. She's my hero.

6) Ash Campbell from Sally Face.

A fact about me, which rarely serves me well but has nevertheless been true for as long as I can remember- is that in a fictional friend group that's All Guys, One Girl, I am always going to be ten million times more interested in the girl than I am the dudes. There's tons of dudes. They're interchangeable. You can swap em all out for each other, who cares, talk to me about HER.

What drew her there? What's her relationship like with the others? What's SHE like, period? I wanna know!

The thing with Ash is that intentionally or not, I think she was set up to be a pretty interesting character. We get a lot of offhanded tidbits of information about her that aren't really explored or followed up on, but- when put together- end up painting a very intriguing picture. We know she has difficulty expressing her emotions openly- she has a social, friendly front that might not be a complete fabrication, but that ends up being almost the only one anyone sees publicly. She'll get angry at times, she'll threaten violence and vengeance on her friends' behalf, but when someone's upset rather than angry, she doesn't know how to react. She's got nothing in her emotional toolkit for this.

We know that she doesn't feel comfortable showing a vulnerable side in front of other people, no matter WHO those people are- in chapter 4, she mentions her brother accusing her of being 'some kind of soulless monster' over her lack of tears during their grandmother's funeral. She tries to play this off like a joke, like this was a ridiculous thing to say, but the fact that she brought it up at all seems to indicate it genuinely hurt her. But she still can't say that, even to Sal, who she trusts a lot. She just has to trust that he understands.

Why? Was she always like this, or did something happen to make her feel this way?

We know she has family members in Nockfell, but we never actually see them. She mentions them a lot throughout chapters 3 and 4, but in 5, they never come up- even during the apocalypse. Did they cut contact with her over her years spent trying to prove an alleged murderer was ill instead of malicious? Did she cut contact with them? Were they among the townspeople "replaced", and she doesn't have the luxury of mourning them?

We don't know.

I love her for her potential, because exploring characters that canon didn't care enough to flesh out is my favorite thing to do.

7) Pete Conlan, from Dimension 20's The Unsleeping City. I adore this motherfucker. He is a disaster of a man, trying his level best to be a better person. He desperately wants to be in love, but has the worst taste in women and an undying attraction to English accents/things that are bad for him. As soon as he realizes a small child looks up to him, he immediately starts trying to model himself into a Good Big Brother despite the fact that this small child is probably thousands of years older than him. Irrelevant. Pete wants to be a better role model. I want nothing but good things for him, and someday I'm gonna have to get Dropout and find out what happens to him in Chapter 2.

8) Robbie Reyes from Marvel comics 2015 Ghost Rider, MARVEL, IF YOU DON'T GIVE MY BOY A REGULAR SERIES AGAIN, I SWEAR TO FUCK-

He loves his little brother more than anything else in the world. His parents died, and he stepped the fuck up as a young teenager to make sure the kid would never want for anything. He has an undying passion for nice cars. He only ever indulged this once, for the sake of providing for Gabe while doing one of a limited amount of things he feels he's actually good at it. It almost cost him everything, and all he could think about while facing death was 'I'm so sorry Gabe'. One of his classmates pretended she needed a calculus tutor to trick him into spending a night doing something fun with her because she correctly assumed that the only way she could get him to relax and do something for himself was if he thought he was doing it to help somebody else. He deserves the world.

9) Kohaku from Dr. Stone. She has an incredibly strong sense of justice, she's five foot nothing and still manages to be the group's undisputed tank, and when she heard somebody say he intended to marry her high ranking, chronically ill sister for power and then leave her to die because he didn't feel like taking care of her, she immediately tried to kill him in front of a live audience. A girl after my own heart.

10) Kaldur'ahm from Young Justice. I loved him in middle school, I love him now. I am very happy he now has a relationship with somebody who puts him first, but every time I see his boyfriend I can't help but be like 'Bro, are you SERIOUS?'

'WERE GARTH AND ROY BOTH BUSY?'

'If that's what you want, fine, but I PROMISE YOU HAVE OTHER OPTIONS-'

If you guys are up for it, I tag @sandpancakecat @grimmalkerie @oreozfox @humble-wayside-flower @alwaysatomicconniseur @kyonite @faithluvscabadre and... pretty much anyone else who wants to!

#ed mention #ed cw #like it's brief but i don't wanna blindside anybody #thanks again! this was fun.

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goshdangronpa · 1 year

Note

Makoto naegi

For the ask thing? Here ya go! And please bear in mind that it's been a long while since I've experienced Trigger Happy Havoc, which I only encountered by watching a walkthrough that didn't do any of the free time events.

Favorite thing about them: He's not the smartest - both Byakuya and Junko probably has hive beat in terms of sheer intellect, and Kyoko could almost certainly solve the cases on her own. Even so, he's no idiot, and he succeeds by combining careful reason with a level of kindness and faith in his fellow human that none of those three can match. His decision to trust that Kyoko is lying for a reason is what ultimately exposes the mastermind and saves the survivors' lives. It's all too easy for mystery genre protagonists to set aside emotion for cold, hard logic - that's the impression I get from Kyoko (whom I like a lot, to be clear). Makoto won't play that way, and that's awesome.

Least favorite thing about them: playing Ultra Despair Girls taught me that a character can be a total normie and somehow make that a hilarious and fun personality to follow. Makoto can't even match his sister in that regard. Not that he needs to be quite like that, though. Saying my least fave thing about any DR character will still end in their favor.

Favorite quote: it's the most obvious pick, but as someone who'd never even heard of the games before watching THH's playthrough, I can't emphasize enough how much of a kick I got from him interrupting his classmates' lies and conjectures with the blunt and plainly rude "NO! THAT'S WRONG!" So friggin' funny. Makoto is nice, but he does not tolerate bullshit!

BroTP: Is it unusual to be a fan of Yasuhiro? I, for one, would enjoy a straight man/funny man duo between this overconfident yet easily spooked moron and his level-headed yet polite friend who pulls him out of jams.

OTP: I once followed a wonderful Tumblrite who was the world's foremost expert on Chihiro Fujisaki. He shipped her with Makoto and invented such a wonderful narrative for them, along with plenty of sweet art, that I was converted. They're so cute.

NoTP: I don't think much about ships, not enough to reject many with any intensity. Let me think ... every nice guy has their limits, and I can only imagine that Makoto would draw the line at the notion of dating Toko. She's a fantastic character in UDG, but such an unrepetantly irritating piece of work in THH. I like to think that he's skeptical, to say the least, of her ability to be a good partner toward Komaru when he first hears about them.

Random headcanon: this isn't the hairstyle he actually wants, he just can't figure out how to tell the barber what he wants done.

Unpopular opinion: what are the popular ones, anyway? Uhhh how about this. Blank-slate audience avatar characters get a lot of flack among writers and critics because they're usually just so functional (give the audience someone to relate to and follow) and boring (outshone by more colorful castmates). Makoto stands out in a franchise defined by titanic personalities just by taking everyone as they are, having the smarts to solve complex murder mysteries, and being a chill and friendly guy. He proves the value of the archetype and shows that characters of this stock can distinguish themselves.

Song I associate with them: https://youtu.be/AFfmNQbcucw (I had to resist putting Mark Morrison's "Return of the Mack")

Favorite picture of them: so good that I actually drew it myself

#makoto naegi #danganronpa #trigger happy havoc #thh #I just think he's neat

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host-club-hq · 2 years

Text

Jasmine

➼ pairing: kyoya ootori x reader

➼ summary: you and kyoya are subjected to an unfavorable fate via your parents, but when the both of you become vulnerable, you close back up just as quickly. (i don't know if i wanna end it here, but idk if i can write more. you guys lemme know if you wanna see more of this drabble)

➼ word count: 7.4k, got a little carried away

➼ what to expect: "It'll be mine soon enough, might as well use it."

➼ warnings: slight angst, mutual pining, slow burn, steamy, language

➼ im actually supposed to be writing an essay right now but i have kyoya on the brain, so here's this :) also tumblr ate half this draft as i was almost done, so you can thank them for this taking so long

➼ chapter navigation

You wouldn't call your parents... neglectful, per say.

More of just... inattentive.

Although they support your lavish lifestyle and provide you with many of your wants and all of your needs, they never seem to know you personally.

It's always been like this. It's not your father who drives you to school, it's your driver. Although that isn't unusual for a kid of your financial status, there are some things that your parents don't do that they should.

There's a syllabus or permission slip you need signed for school? Your head butler, Ren, signs it for you. Your parents have appointed him your caretaker, never mind the fact that they were actually present in your life. On the school emergency contact list, Ren's name is the only one present.

Well, not the only one. Your aunt volunteered. Although she's usually very busy, she felt sympathy for the way her sister and brother-in-law have raised you.

You have a personal shopper. Although your parents never believed in needing someone to dress you and do most basic human functions for you, you need someone like a motherly figure to shop with you.

She helps you pick out your clothes, try things on, encourages you when she sees something she likes, advises you on what to pair together and how to style accessories.

Her name is Lindsay, you enjoy her presence often, which is why you shop often, even if you don't purchase anything.

Only once did your parents hire a professional to teach you how to do your own hair and makeup. But, that was a one time thing. One lesson was all your parents believed you needed, if even that. The next day you were expected to remember everything she'd breezed through.

Not surprisingly, you did.

You parents were not your mom and dad, rather your mother and father. To you, there is a very clear difference between the terms.

A mother and father biologically have a child together, a mom and dad parent a child together.

You didn't even know your parents' real names until you were 11 years old.

And it was Ren who'd told you when you asked.

♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

"Miss y/n?"

You're busying yourself with homework when Ren calls your name from the doorway to your bedroom, already open.

"Hm?" When you acknowledge that it's him, you return to your writing and vaguely listen to what he has to say.

"Your... parents would like to have a word with you."

Your pen stills in your hand mid-word. You crane your neck over your shoulder and stare blankly at Ren, in disbelief. He nods in reassurance.

You shoot up from your chair and dart into your closet, picking a modest pair of earrings and a necklace. You stand straight in front of your mirror and dust yourself off, spinning around to face Ren.

"How do I look?" you breathe out slowly.

Ren steps forward and gently takes two strands of your hair on either side, adjusting them softly.

"Wonderful. Now, they're waiting." Ren pats you gently on your shoulder. You squeal to yourself and hurry into the living room with a skip in your step.

You arrive into the living room and compose yourself, watching as you parents stand professionally in the center of the room.

You inhale deeply and straighten your posture, folding your hands in front of your body and waiting to be spoken to.

"y/n, we have a matter to discuss with you." Your father speaks first, your mother on his arm.

"Yes?" You reply timidly.

"As you may know, we have recently entered a business relationship with the Ootori family." your father informs, but unbeknownst to you, quite grimly.

"You may know their son, Kyoya Ootori." your mother adds quickly.

"Yes, ma'am, he's in my class." you nod curtly, taking another deep breath.

"That's good, because you will be married to him in less than a year."

Your face pales and you stop fidgeting with your fingers, "What?" your voice is no more than a mere whisper.

"In order to secure the deal, Yoshio Ootori would like to marry off his third son in order to merge our companies, seeing as his older sons are already engaged and/or married."

"And, seeing as you are our only daughter, we offered your hand in marriage."

"You don't have the right to offer my hand!"

Your sudden outburst is seemingly unwelcome, judging by your parents' expressions. Your voice echoes off the living room walls from the mere size. There is a painful moment of silence.

"What's done is done, you will be married to Kyoya Ootori by December of this year." Your father extracts his phone and beings to distract himself.

"It's April." you inform like it wasn't a well known fact. April seems so close to December for you, especially if you will be married by then.

"And?" Your father lifts his cell phone to his ear, giving you once last emotionless glance, then strides from the room with a greeting to the individual over the phone.

Your mother's eyes display the smallest amount of sympathy before following your father wordlessly.

This year, you and Kyoya will be finishing your last year of high school. You will turn 19 by the end of the summer, and Kyoya already is. He'll be turning 20 in November. A month before you're married.

You always knew you would marry a wealthy man, especially because of your parents' bizarre expectations, but you always thought it would be because you loved him.

You should have seen this coming. Marrying you off is exactly something your parents would do.

Your world is falling apart.

♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

School the next day is excruciating, to say the least.

You're constantly steering clear of the Host Club, especially Kyoya in particular. He, of course, would know of his father's decision. You can't think to face him like this.

You and Kyoya are friends, alright. Not obscenely close, but not strangers either. He knows of you, talks with you, and invites you to the Host Club on different occasions, sometimes to their private events.

How could you face him now? Your fiancé? The word makes you shiver, especially when you think about spending the rest of your life with him.

The bell rings abruptly in your ears- you've zoned out. You shake yourself from your thoughts and gently push your notebook into your book bag. Most students have already packed their belongings and strode out of class.

"y/n."

You freeze mid-shove. You turn slowly at the voice, acknowledging the tall male with jet black hair. You immediately know who it is, reluctantly glancing at your reflection in his thin, shining glasses.

"Hm?" You reply shortly.

"The Host Club is hosting an event to celebrate the end of our last year in high school. Seeing as you're in our class, I thought you might like to attend."

Ah, so he's asking you as a student. Not a friend. While you're slightly disappointed, you're also relieved.

"How should I dress?" You ask, slinging your bag over one shoulder and standing timidly to face him, refusing to let your eyes rest comfortably on his face, rather the wall behind him.

"Formally, as most events directed by the Host Club tend to be."

That seems like a backhanded statement. You frown. "Fine." you huff definitively, spinning on your heel with your head help high, nose stuck up into the air.

"What time should I pick you up?" Kyoya asks like it's the most casual question in the world. Really, it should be, but it isn't.

"You're picking me up?" You halt in your tracks to face him in confusion.

"Of course, how else would you be getting to the function? I thought since we're to be married, we might as well make our parents happy and spend more time together."

A beat of painful, agonizing silence. Kyoya knows. He knows to a degree that this isn't what you want, and on some level, he doesn't want it either. He's lived his whole life pleasing his father, and nothing's going to stop him now.

You grip the strap of your bag tightly, tears pricking your eyes when reminded of your inevitable fate. Neither of you move to leave, or to speak. Just a very uncomfortable silence.

"Might as well." Your voice is squeaky from lack of use, you clear your throat.

"Any time past 5:00 is fine." you breathe out as quickly as possible, whirling around to make your exit, bringing a single finger up to your face and dabbing gently under your eyes as you scurry away.

Kyoya remains silent and emotionless, his expression unchanging. Although he feels a twist deep in his stomach when he noticed you drying your tears. He never meant to put you in this position, but it wasn't his fault, was it? No. He hadn't had a choice either.

But you both will do anything to please your parents, won't you?

♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

You slide your hands over your hips, the sleek, black dress with a plunging neckline accenting your body wonderfully. The material clings to your body, all the way down to the slit that travels as far as your upper left thigh. Very classy, yet sensual- just what you're going for.

You adjust your earrings, your necklace matching perfectly. A knock comes to the frame of your doorway and you acknowledge it by swiveling, your hands occupied with your earring.

Ren stands fondly at the entrance to your room. "I believe I caught word of Mr. Ootori arriving here soon." he smiles knowingly.

You give a weak smile in return, clasping the back of your earring in place and dusting yourself off.

"Your evening clutch, Ma'am." Ren presents you with a stunning silver bedazzled, strapless hand bag. Your grin widens.

"Is this Aunt Elise's?" You recall her wearing it to a fair few events and occasions. Ren nods. Your heart swells with appreciation.

"She thought you might like to use it tonight." Ren informs you. You nod, turning the precious accessory over in your hands, marveling.

"Now, he will be arriving soon." Ren pats your back as you shove a few last minute things into your clutch. You carefully stride to the door in your heels.

When you open the door, Kyoya's just now arriving. It would be traditional for the gentleman to come to the door to pick up his lady, but you've had enough of doing things the traditional way for now. You will make your own decision, this time.

You watch the sleek, black limousine come to a clean halt near the steps leading to the entrance of your home. The windows are tinted, but you can still make out a silhouette in the back, neck craned down, a slight glow. He's on his phone. On cue, your phone vibrates.

Kyoya: Are you ready?

You scoff mockingly to yourself, replying.

You: If you bothered to look up, you would know

The silhouette moves, facing you. You make a show of descending the steps, your hips swaying, heel to toe, heel to toe.

The limousine door opens and you're met with Kyoya in a clean, crisply straight black suit, black undershirt, and black tie to match. If it weren't for you new-found confidence, your jaw would have hit the ground by now.

"You look stunning." Are the first words he greets you with. Your cheeks flush a red hue under your makeup.

"Thank you. I like this suit." You adjust his collar with your fingers and gleam up at him. He offers a small smile in return.

"I had a feeling you'd want to wear black. Shall we?" He offers you his arm politely. You nod, slipping your hand and wrist through the gap between his arm and his body.

Being this close to him, you can smell the cologne he wears. The scent is inexplicably addictive, unmistakably him, like a warm cup of coffee, but like spicy cinnamon at the same time. You inhale deeply, savoring the fragrance.

It seems like a thousand steps from your front door to the limousine in the heels you've chosen, but you find relief in the plush leather seats as Kyoya escorts you inside.

"Comfortable?" He shuts the door and settles in next to you.

"Mm, wouldn't you like to know." you cross your ankles delicately and fold your hands in your lap, back straight.

"Alright, I see how it'll be tonight." Kyoya suppresses a smirk and straightens next to you.

The entire ride consists of a surprisingly comfortable silence. It's not often that silence with Kyoya is pleasurable, but neither of you feel the need to say anything amidst the quiet nature of the car.

When you arrive, anxiety fills the cavern of your chest and you feel as though it's constricting. The limousine comes to a perfect stop at the entrance to Ouran Academy's ball room. You know the room very well. Although now, it seems unfamiliar, like you've never stepped foot inside all your life.

The open doorway is decorated with lights and silk banners as students file in with their partners, some individually.

You haven't noticed that Kyoya has opened the door and is offering you his arm to pull yourself up and out. He allows you to hesitate a moment longer, then clears his throat gently.

"Is something wrong?" His voice is soft and concerned.

"No." You reply immediately, gripping onto his arm and pulling yourself out.

You're half expecting paparazzi's cameras to flash the moment you exit the automobile from the way you're dressed and the stunningly handsome man who's arm you're attached to, but you're thankful that it doesn't happen. You're not sure you want this night documented just yet.

As the name of your purse suggests, you clutch it tight as you stride with Kyoya up the stairs. Naturally, the pair of you have arrived a bit early, seeing as he is part of the club that is hosting the event. Nevertheless, the early birds are starting to arrive as well.

Kyoya is starting to think this might be the event he's been the most nervous for in a long time. Having someone as astonishing, stunning, and captivating as you on his arm? He might be the luckiest man alive. Despite this fact, he remains poised and elegantly emotionless.

He manages to sneak a glance of your side profile, your features remaining unfazed and stoic. He adjusts his glasses with his free hand, the lenses giving a sharp glint from the light of the chandeliers looming above him in the ballroom.

You and Kyoya are greeted with the remaining hosts as they've all seemed to have arrived quite some time ago. Unusually, the rest of them are without dates. Although, you assume Tamaki would have a date if Haruhi wasn't expected to be a male host for this occasion.

"y/n! So glad you could make it! It's so nice to see you!"

You should expect what Tamaki does next- embracing you unabashedly and gripping you tight. You grunt and stumble, reciprocating as a reflex.

"Nice to see you too, Tamaki." Your voice strains as he releases you and you take a deep breath.

"Senpai, if you want to see her again, you'll have to stop suffocating her." Haruhi deadpans behind him. You giggle at her comment. She beams.

"Can we steal her? Please, Kyoya?!" Tamaki begs pitifully with his infamous puppy eyes. Kyoya does all but give in, sighing.

"You can. I'll just be going over some last minute preparations if you need me." Kyoya directs his last statement your way. You nod.

"Okay."

Tamaki tugs on your arm and you allow him to drag you behind him, vaguely listening as he goes on and on about how much he's missed you. Haruhi trudges behind the two of you, grumbling.

As Tamaki steals you away to mingle with the rest of the hosts as Kyoya tends to his responsibilities, the party begins to fill out, guests arriving left and right.

The party is now in full swing. Kyoya is still tending to guests and budget related issues. You've gone to procure yourself a drink, leaning as lady-like as you can against the beverage table and sipping quietly.

Out of thin air, two arms perch themselves on either of your shoulders. You choke on your drink and pat your own chest, coughing.

"Whoa there, y/n." Two voices harmonize in either of your ears.

"Hello, boys." you sigh, letting your shoulders slouch under the weight of their arms.

The twins snicker deviously on your right and left, dressed identically.

“So what’s this rumor about you and Kyoya-Senpai?” you can only guess which twin is speaking to you, although you determine that that’s not what’s important right now.

“Depends, what did you hear?” You glance up at who you can only assume is Hikaru.

“Oh, so it’s not the only rumor?” the second twin infers, and you turn your head to him.

“That’s not what I said.” You shake your head, cup balanced in your hand.

“But it’s what you implied.” Both of them together, this time.

“What do you want to know?” You take a long sip from your drink, eyeing them in your peripheral vision. They both turn and gaze at your side profile with mischievous smirks.

“We heard that you might be engaged-”

“-so we’re wondering where the ring is.”

You snort at their question. They tilt their heads, confused. “I don’t have a ring.” you flourish your left hand, which has three rings, but none of them are on your ring finger.

“That seems a little untraditional, doesn’t it Kaoru?” Hikaru hums.

“It does, Hikaru.” Kaoru nods. You laugh humorlessly, “You’re telling me.” your shoulders almost shake with your laughter.

"We wouldn't peg Kyoya-Senpai to skimp on an engagement ring for his fiancé." The twins shrug in unison. You grimace.

"Please don't call me that, it makes me feel old." your body shudders involuntarily, the twins' brows furrow further, now more confused than ever.

"Huh?"

"You should be glad that you'll probably never have to subject yourself to something like that." You sigh wistfully.

Before Hikaru or Kaoru have a chance to reply, your eyes find Kyoya approaching the three of you. You breathe a sigh of relief and set your drink on the table behind you.

"Hikaru, Kaoru, would you mind if I stole y/n away a moment?" He asks politely, offering you his hand.

"Not at all." The twins shove you forward and you lurch, your reflexes causing your hand to find its place firmly gripped in Kyoya's.

You're gently pulled to the center dance floor, your arm instinctively placing itself on Kyoya's shoulder and the other in his hand. His own hand secures around your waist and holds you reasonably close, but not close enough to cause suspicion among guests. He is still a host, after all. He can't be showing any favoritism.

"Just wanted to dance with me, Ootori?" You question in the silence save for the orchestra playing beautifully in the background.

"Only using my last name now? y/n, I thought we were friendlier than that." Kyoya dodges the question expertly.

"It'll be mine soon enough, might as well use it." using humor to avoid pain, often a tactic of yours. Kyoya smiles nonetheless.

"Touché, well played." Kyoya smirks as you sway together.

Meanwhile, Haruhi approaches the twins, arms crossed.

"It's awful, isn't it?" she jumps into conversation without context.

"Awful?" the twins follow her eyes to the pair of you, moving rhythmically to the music.

"Yeah, I can't even imagine." Haruhi's reply is vague, confusing the twins further.

"Hikaru, Kaoru, Haruhi! What are you doing over here, we have guests waiting." Tamaki all but storms over to the trio and points to the meandering patrons.

"Just watching Kyoya and y/n-Senpai." Haruhi shrugs. She prays she won't be pushed onto the dance floor by her boss at this moment.

Tamaki follows her line of sight and finds the two of you as well, eyes softening. He settles for watching the pair of you along with the other hosts.

"I still can't believe I wasn't the first person Kyoya told." Tamaki pouts with his arms crossed against his chest, slouching.

"What are we missing here?" Hikaru demands, having had enough of being oblivious, Kaoru voices his agreement.

"You didn't know?" Tamaki cranes his neck to catch a glance of the infuriated twins.

"Kyoya-Senpai and y/n-Senpai's parents are becoming partners and they're expecting them to get married." Haruhi informs grimly.

Hikaru and Kaoru glance at each other with shock, then back at the pair of you. Although you're talking to Kyoya casually, with the new information, they see you in a different light.

"Oh." Is all they have to say.

"Do you think they'll be okay?" Haruhi blinks owlishly up at Tamaki in question. He casts his eyes down to her own, then back to you.

"I think it'll take a while. I don't even think they know." it's one of the rare occurrences when Tamaki's wisdom shows through his facade.

"Know what?" Haruhi inquires again, following his sight.

"Look at them." Tamaki gestures with his arms to the both of you.

On cue, you shove Kyoya playfully and he only smiles down at you, his eyes shimmering with something undetectable.

"There's something there. But, as stubborn as Kyoya is, there's no use in trying to tell him. They'll have to figure it out on their own." Haruhi watches Tamaki's soft eyes follow your form, darting back and forth as you dance.

And slowly, the world feels as if it's falling away. Piece by piece, the party in the background, the guests and other hosts fall into nothingness, and you're dancing among the stars, weightless and effortlessly. The orchestra continues it's smooth rhythm, echoing through the universe. All that's left is you and Kyoya, and you don't even seem to notice.

That is, until you do notice.

You realize the proximity, the way he delicately grips your hand and your waist. Your breath gets caught in your throat and you have the sudden urge to pry yourself away.

"I'm- um, I need to powder my nose." You lean back, removing your hand from his shoulder.

Kyoya raises a single brow. It's the middle of a song, but he can sense the sudden panic swimming in your irises. He releases you gently.

"Alright-" but you're already gone, weaving through guests and other hosts and slipping from his vision.

And so Kyoya stands in the midst of gyrating bodies and blinding lights, watching you disappear in the crowd. But, it isn't long before a few guests approach him.

"Kyoya~ Would you mind if I stole this dance?" another girl peers at him from behind the first one, anticipating his reply.

He gives them the most polite smile he can, as genuinely as he can, but inside he feels the opposite. "Of course, my dears. That's what I'm here for." he takes her into his arms and begins to sway to the rhythm.

But it's not the same. Although he's doing his job and he's never had a problem with it before, it doesn't feel right. She doesn't fit into his arms like you do, like a long lost puzzle piece finally slotted into the right position. She feels... wrong, for lack of better words.

Nevertheless, he is a host, and a host exudes chivalry.

♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

Never have you struggled like this over an assignment. Naturally, most of your classes come easily to you, and that's why you guess that you and Kyoya get along easily.

But this is different. Your college essay. Academically, you can write sophisticated essays about most topics. But, when it comes to yourself, you have little to say.

You stare at a blank page, your cursor flashing without a purpose. You lay comfortably on your bed, blinking owlishly at the white screen. Not a single idea has popped into your head. What are you even supposed to write about? Why can't you just pick an academic topic and write about that?

Of course, for middle school or even early high school, you've written ice-breaker papers about things the teacher wanted to know so that they could teach the class with prior knowledge- but this is requiring to delve deep into your inner soul, you don't think you've ever even done that yourself.

You reluctantly pick up your cell phone and select a contact that you assume won't answer at this time. It's late.

Meanwhile, Kyoya's cell phone rings suddenly. He shamefully admits to himself that he's startled by the bright light and sudden noise. Once it registers in his mind, he puts down his book and picks up the phone instead, reading off the contact name.

y/n l/n

He thinks for a moment that maybe he should add something more to your contact name, but the thought vanishes as quickly as it had come to him. Kyoya answers.

"Hello?"

There's a silence on your end. You hadn't been expecting him to pick up.

"Hi." is all you can manage.

Kyoya firmly resists the urge to chuckle fondly, but replies semi-mockingly instead, "Hi, y/n."

"I, um... I need help," you sigh in reluctance.

"May I ask with what?" he hums in reply, saving his place in his novel and setting it to the side, focusing on his gentle conversation with you.

"College essay..." you almost whine, almost ashamed.

Kyoya furrows his eyebrows on his side, "Isn't it a little late for college essays?" He has already submitted and been accepted into to a college- Chiba University.

"I know... I just, I think I'm going to take a break next year. I need some time off." You sound exhausted. Kyoya almost cringes in sympathy.

"That's understandable. Besides, it's not like you'll need to support yourself once we graduate."

A stinging reminder of your future after high school. You do suppose you can consider yourself lucky, he's right. You don't have to support yourself, and you don't even need a college education if you really think about it. But, you want one. For you, not for him.

"I guess you're right." you lay back on your bed loudly, sighing.

"I'll come over and help you, yeah?" Kyoya hoists himself off his bed and slips into his coat, his slippers sliding onto his feet and he makes his way out of his room.

"What? I thought we could just talk over the phone." you sit up in panic. You're in your pajamas and not prepared for company.

"I know, but it'll be easier." you can hear that on his side, he's already out the door and walking to his car.

"You're driving yourself?" you question incredulously.

"I don't want to bother the drivers right now. I got my license about a year ago, thought it would be useful to have." You hear the car door shut on his side and the engine starts.

"Okay..." you can't think of anything else to say.

"Be there soon."

You nod, "Yeah, see you." you hang up, anticipating his arrival as you sit uncomfortably on the edge of your bed.

After a moment of thoughtful silence on your part, you straighten and smooth out your pajama set, which is a pair of shorts and a skimpy tank-top, but you're sure that won't be a problem.

The sound of your bare footsteps pad into the kitchen and on into the entry hall, passing Ren on your way.

"Miss y/n. Do you need something? It's very late." Ren checks his watch and straightens his posture as you pass him.

"Oh um... Kyoya is coming over a minute. Just wanted to meet him at the door." You rub the back of your neck awkwardly, averting your eyes to the chandelier above you instead of Ren's questioning gaze.

"Mr. Ootori?" Then, Ren seems to have it figured out.

"Oh... would... would you like me to...?" Ren jabs his thumb to the exit of the room, suggesting he turn in for the night.

"What? No! Oh, God, no!" You wave at him in urgency, denying his implied claim.

"I understand. Just let me know if you need anything." He bows and turns on his heel to leave you be, standing in the middle of the kitchen in your pajama shorts and tank-top.

It isn't long before there's a soft knock on your front door. You briefly acknowledge the fact that he's neglected to ring the doorbell because of the hour. Your heart pulses at the consideration.

You turn the knob gently and swing it open to reveal Kyoya, dressed oddly domestically, laptop, notebook, and writing utensils brought along with him.

The odd silence between you feels tensed. Finally, he speaks up and cuts through the tension with a dull butter knife.

"Hello." It's a simple greeting, almost awkward, before you stand aside to let him inside.

"Hi. Thanks for coming." he strides past you and nods gently.

"Bedroom is... this way." You gesture vaguely down the hall from the kitchen and lead the way. You can hear his soft footfalls on the floor in the slippers you've provided him with and you heart picks up the pace.

"I don't think I've ever been to your house before." Kyoya takes in his surroundings, the hallway leading to your bedroom is pristine and lengthy.

"You've been to my parents' parties here, right?" You glance at him over your shoulder and suppress a smile at his expression.

"Well, yes. But those parties were held in the ballroom and it isn't too dissimilar from my own." Kyoya reminds. You hum in acknowledgement and turn the corner to the door to your room.

"Just in here. It's a bit of a mess, when I get stressed, I get disorganized, and when I'm disorganized, I'm stressed. It's a relentless cycle." You grumble before pushing open the heavy wooden door.

Kyoya expects much more of a mess than he's greeted with. Despite a few papers strewn about your bed covering and your laptop open near the edge, nothing else seems out of place. He doesn't know what he expected of your room, but it fits you more than he can describe.

You fold your legs beneath your body and pick up your laptop to place it in your lap, ready to begin work. Your eyes dart up from the screen to gaze at Kyoya, standing in the middle of your room as his eyes bound across the room.

"Aren't you going to sit?" You gesture to a number of comfortable surfaces in your room. There's plenty of room on your bed, given the size, but a chair would also suffice. Anything but watching him stand in the center of the room awkwardly would be acceptable.

"Right." you seem to have ripped him from a dizzy daydream and he settles for a chair near your bed. You don't pay his decision much attention and open your empty document.

"I just... can't come up with a single thing to put in this essay." you toss your hands up indignantly, creasing your brow in irritation as your blinking cursor continues to mock you.

"Typically these essays are supposed to reflect your inner workings, tell your university of choice who you are." Kyoya opens his own laptop and begins a new document.

"That's the problem, I've got nothing." you huff, tossing your laptop gently to the side and lying back on your sheets.

"What do you mean you've got nothing?" Kyoya all but chuckles at your antics. You sit halfway up to glare at him.

"I mean I've got nothing! Absolutely nothing comes to mind when thinking about myself. I feel like I can evaluate others just fine, but when it comes to myself... I'm just-"

"Oblivious?" Kyoya's eyes cautiously find yours over his laptop screen. He took the words right out of your mouth.

"I-... yeah, exactly." You're at a loss for words. How did he know?

"I can relate to that to a certain extent." Kyoya resonates with you on a deep level.

You cross your legs casually, "What did you write about?"

Instinctively, Kyoya's eyes fly to your legs where your shorts ride up as your leg folds over your other leg. He physically shakes the thought from his head and meets your eyes again. Or, at least your face.

"Me?" it's a stupid question. He can't say he's ever asked a stupid question before. But there it was, coming right from between his lips.

"Yes, you." You giggle at his question. He curses himself and his hormones for his behavior.

"I just..." What did he write about? Why is it suddenly so hard to remember? When did it get so hot in your room?

"I remembered what my sister told me... when I was struggling with my essay. She said just to tell them that 'Kyoya Ootori is blank', and that seemed to be a good outline for what I wanted to say."

"I think plenty of stories from your adventures in the Host Club helped with that, a little." you tease as you crawl up onto your bed, feeling more comfortable in his presence.

"Indeed it did. Aside from that, you want to be sure not to reiterate anything in your resume. As much as the Host Club is a large part of mine, I tried to avoid restating it too much." Kyoya advises as he pulls a copy of his essay from the depths of his many documents.

"Right. That's smart." it seems like a silly thing to say. Most of what comes from Kyoya's brain and out of his mouth is smart. You dig into your files and find your resume, opening it up and scrolling through it.

"Hm. See, I've already got my family history on here... let's see..." you squint at the bright screen in your dimly lit room.

"And your family doesn't define you." Kyoya's statement is bold and garish. You glance at him.

"How do you mean?" You tilt your head.

"I didn't put my family in my essay at all. It didn't seem like something I wanted them to define me as." Kyoya finds the words to say easily.

"I see what you mean. As much as they don't know about you, your family should be one of the unknowns." You try to comprehend his advice in your own way.

As you begin typing away, you glance at him one last time. "Why're you still all the way over there? Come up here." you pat the bed next to you firmly, a clear gesture to join you on the mattress.

Kyoya hesitates a moment. Finally, he complies and sits cross-legged next to you on the bed, laptop in a similar position to yours. He tries his best to keep his posture straight, God only knows how that will feel in the morning if he doesn't.

The clacking of your fingers on the keys and the clicking of his mousepad ring in the silence. Occasionally, your typing stops and Kyoya glances up to find that you're stuck- eyebrows furrowed and tongue poking the inside of your cheek as your eyes read and reread over your draft.

Eventually, you let out a frustrated hum and scoot closer to him, much to his surprise. "Alright, here's what I have so far."

It seems you really only need someone to bounce ideas off of. Kyoya hasn't provided much help, although a few pieces of advice, but most of what you're writing you've come up with on your own. He finds himself not focused on what you're saying at all, but the way your lips form around words as you speak, the way your fingers slightly tremble as they grasp behind your laptop as if you're nervous, the way your eyes flit to and fro across the screen as you read.

And suddenly you're finished. You glance up at him, gauging his reaction. Once he notices that your lips have stopped moving, he glances up to meet your eyes as well. Nothing of what you said made it to his ears. Not one bit. A faint blush spreads across his face at the thought of being caught staring.

"Well?" you ask in the silence.

Kyoya's eyes linger on you before casting down to his own laptop. "I-um... good- it's good, yeah." he scratches the back of his neck and chews anxiously on the inside of his cheek.

What kind of spell have you put on him? What kind of creature are you to render the Kyoya Ootori unable to concentrate or form a coherent sentence? What kind of sorcery is this?

"Kyoya." You call him out of his thoughts in a stern voice. His gray irises move up to you in a hurry.

"You didn't hear a word of what I just said."

And there it is. You pointed it out. Kyoya feels his heart twang. Damn his sudden emotions, they aren't supposed to come to him in a rush like this.

"I'm sorry, I was... distracted." he decides on after a moment of thinking.

"What could you possibly be distracted by?" Kyoya can hear the irritation dripping from your voice but he can't help when his eyes glance at your lips at your inquiry.

You, you seductive wench.

You follow his gaze and know exactly what he's looking at. You feel a sudden confidence bloom in your chest at his incapability to speak.

Kyoya only looks back into your eyes when your lips tug up on one side, simpering up at him.

"Would it help to... take a break?" you gently shut the lid of your laptop and set it aside. Kyoya's heart picks up the pace.

"Potentially... yes. We should do something else. We should-"

You yank him by the collar and firmly press your lips to Kyoya's. His lips are pressed into a thin line, eyes wide and unsure of how to react.

You're kissing him. You're kissing him. Oh, God. He should do something, he should-

"You talk too much." you whisper against his lips and close your mouth again against his.

Kyoya can't help his eyes that flutter shut, can't help but inhale deeply, your scent overriding his senses. His mind screams your name because that's all he can think of. y/n, y/n, y/n.

He would stop himself, but... he remembers...

First of all, you're his fiancé. This is what fiancés should do. It's almost expected.

And second of all, it's you. You're clouding his senses.

Self-control? Who's she?

Kyoya has no idea what he's doing. Not only has he never kissed anyone before, his mind is also melting, falling apart, how ever you want to describe it. It's useless, and he can't even comprehend how to reciprocate. And, oh, your lips are so soft. You taste like jasmine, lavender? No, jasmine. Jasmine is much more rich and seductive.

Luckily, you know what to do. Your lips are moving, almost mouthing at his own. Kyoya remembers what he's always heard; just mimic your partner.

He tries to do what you're doing, and it seems to work.

Speaking of you, your mind is screaming at you; what the hell are you doing?!

But when Kyoya starts to kiss you back, his lips moving in sync with yours, your nerves settle. You can't help your mouth stretching into a thin line, smiling as you acknowledge that his arms are stationary at his sides.

"Your arms go here." you grasp his wrists and place them on your waist. His hands feel tense, stiff.

Kyoya emits a noise and gently pushes against you, detaching his mouth from yours and taking a deep, open-mouthed breath in, like a man drowning and finally surfacing for a breath of air.

"I can't breathe." He exhales deeply, then. Now that you can get a better look at him, you can see his flushed cheeks and glazed-over eyes. His lungs were burning, otherwise he wouldn't have pulled away.

You giggle at him and Kyoya swears he hears angels from on high. Is this heaven? Has he ascended to the great beyond?

But when the neurons in his brain start firing again, all he can see is your and your cheeks painted a pretty pink, eyes hooded as you gaze at him with a look he's never seen before.

You? Heaven? Same word, different letters.

Suddenly, as much as Kyoya needs air, he needs you again. But, he's not sure if he wants to move toward you. He's conflicted. He should have much more self control, but when you intrude on his thoughts (a very much welcomed intrusion), he can't find himself caring enough to stop.

"Who would've thought? Kyoya Ootori, you are a very talented kisser." You chuckle seductively as you release your grip on his collar.

"Had some experience?" there's a certain type of humor in your tone. You've always resorted to using jokes to cover up negative emotions; like jealousy, in this case. Kyoya really is a good kisser... you can only wonder where or with who he learned how.

"No." Kyoya answers immediately, shaking his head defiantly. You raise an eyebrow, relief flooding your senses.

"Oh?" is all you can say. You can feel the dread of a sudden lull in the conversation.

"No, I just... mimicked you." he admits, thoroughly winded.

You bite your lip to suppress a much too large smile, reaching for your laptop and pacing to your desk to set it there.

"I think we've done enough for tonight. Thank you... for your help. And, everything else." you tease, clasping your hands behind your back and swaying on your feet. You leap back onto your bed and tuck your legs beneath you.

Kyoya exhales, then fumbles with himself and then his things. "Right. Right, I'll just..." He's almost to your door, but you tug on his shirt to keep him from going too far.

"Won't you stay the night?" Your voice is soft and pleading, quite contrasting to your earlier confidence.

Kyoya takes a glimpse of your hand grasping the fabric of his clothing.

"With me?" you clarify after a moment.

"But, your parents..." Kyoya reminds you that the two of you are not alone in this house.

You laugh humorlessly, "You've met my parents, haven't you? I'm not so convinced they'll care if you stay or go."

"Do... you care if I stay or go?" Kyoya tries cautiously. Because that's all that really matters. It's your opinion he cares about. For once, he finds himself putting someone else's opinion above his own.

"Do you want me to care?" that's not really the response he's looking for. He wants you to be vulnerable first.

The silence in your room is deafening. Neither of you speak but you can practically feel the nerves radiating off of one another.

"I should probably go."

Kyoya regrets it. Oh, he can't even begin to describe how much he regrets what he's said, but he can't let his guard down for longer than he has.

You feel your heart wrench at his words, "Yeah, yeah. It's probably best." You wrest yourself from your bed and swiftly move on to your nightly routine so as to distract yourself.

"Right." Kyoya gathers his things and waits at your doorway, silently begging for you to call him back to you. Back into your arms, back into the warm safety of your embrace.

But you don't. You don't even spare him a glance as you make your way to your bathroom.

"I'll see you soon." he calls. The end of school means he doesn't get to see you everyday. Not without initiating.

"See you. Goodnight." Kyoya can almost hear the pain in your voice, the trembling. He winces at himself.

"Goodnight." he walks himself to your front door, slipping out without another glance behind him.

When he leaves, the pain sets in. You grip the edges of your sink with fervor and your eyes squeeze shut tightly. You shouldn't have taken a chance, how could you think something like that would work out for the better?

Soon after your routine, you wrap yourself in your blankets and swaddle yourself in sorrow, your heart pounding with a dull aching pain. You find it hard to breathe, hard to catch your breath. You groan and bury your body beneath the blankets, settling in for a dreamless sleep.

Whatever troubles tomorrow brings can't compare to the agonizing pain of the present.

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