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saintmagx · 15 days

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Chamber of Horrors 😈

Grayson Waller x reader

an: just came across Grayson Waller on Chamber of Horrors with Scarlett and Shotzi and it gave me some inspo 👻 IF YOU HAVENT WATCHED IT, YOU SHOULD! He is literally polite, respectful, funny and hella scared. This story doesn’t follow the video exactly because my memory is bad and I started writing this so long ago I forgot so much stuff, plus trying to rewrite a video is kinda hard 🫣

‼️ Warning: swearing, bad story telling, cringe writing, not proof read, just rambles no actual good storyline‼️

“Our final guest of the night is the current WWE Woman’s Champion y/n!” Kayla says excitedly.

Walking out into the cozy studio my nerves settle slightly, I’ve never been on the bump before, nor had any kind of chat show interview before, so I’m a little overwhelmed. I make my way over to the other guests Scarlett and Shotzi and sit down next to them.

“So welcome to your first ever bump appearance, how has it taken us this long to get you here?” Kayla asks.

“Honestl-”

Cut off before I could even answer, a strong accent fills the studio, Grayson who was also a guest - who was joining us via video chat - had to pipe up - it’s what he does best.

“Let me answer that.”

“You see, yn wouldn’t come on the show unless yours truly was also a guest. I mean can you blame her, who wouldn’t want to be on the same show as the Aussie icon.”

“Ah yes Grayson of course, every time they asked me to come on the show I would say unless you have thee Grayson Waller on your show, I ain’t interested.”

He smiles and slightly chuckles, unable to retaliate.

We continue to hype up the next PLE. Shotzi and Scarlett then go onto speak about the release of more episodes of Chamber of Horrors.

“Yn we would love to have you as a guest on the next season! It would be so fun.” Scarlett suggests.

“Absolutely not.” I say - little too quickly.

“I might come across as someone who is tough but deep down I’m scared of most things. And being in an area that is high on the paranormal activity is a definite no for me.”

“We would be there, nothing would happen to you. It’s completely safe.” Shotzi tries her best to convince me to appear in the show, but her words fill me with little confidence.

“I’ll go on if you do yn.” Grayson declares.

“What?”

“If you do the show, I’ll do it with you. Moral support and all that. Plus if you get too scared you can always hold my hand.” His signature smirk creeping onto his face.

Feeling like my back was against the wall I agree to appear and anyway they might not ask me to be on it for a long time and we might not even go to somewhere that is extremely haunted. I was unfortunately wrong on both fronts.

The call to appear on an episode of Chamber of Horrors came all too quickly. It was decided that we would go and see Bloody Mary in New Orleans, which involved a seance and an independent ghost hunt around the haunted house.

Sitting around the table in a circle, Bloody Mary describes how the evening will go and says a few incantations to start of the seance.

“First we will go around the table and introduce ourselves to the spirits. Squeezing from left to right on our hands.” She tells the table.

She introduces herself then squeezes my left hand. My turn I guess

“My name is yn.” I then squeeze Grayson hand for him to start

“My name is Grayson Waller, Maddison square garden main eventer.”

“I’m Shotzi”

“I’m Scarlett”

We continue to hold hands until Bloody Mary continues. She introduces us to a doll named Henry. Scarlett picks him up and places him onto a clearly uncomfortable Graysons lap.

“He likes the ladies, he’s a bit of a flirt.” Bloody Mary explains to us.

“Aw yes lad! We could be brothers.” Grayson says, “however I have to move you closer to Shotzi and Scarlett, can’t have you making moves on people you shouldn’t be.”

I look at Grayson confused, why would he say that?

“So is it true someone at this table hasn’t seen a horror film.” Bloody Mary questions. Looking around the table I find it hard to believe. Shotzi and Scarlett are literally horror queens and I’ve dabbled in horror movies myself, like who hasn’t. That only leaves Grayson…

“You haven’t seen a single horror movie? Like ever?” I quiz Grayson.

“Nope, I just like laughing. Why would I watch something that would make me scared?”

Stunned.

“The fact you haven’t seen the all time classics, I’m shocked. We have to change that.”

With a playful glint in his eyes he reply’s “are you asking me on a date? I mean I suppose if you were there to hold my hand I wouldn’t mind watching a scary film.”

And that right there is the famous Grayson Waller charm. I roll my eyes and laugh off his flirtation.

“I’ll ask theory to show you some of the classics. It’s gonna change your life.”

“I’d rather you show me them. I think I’d appreciate them more with you.”

He smiles slightly and shifts his attention back to Bloody Mary. Not noticing how his response had affected me.

The part I had been least looking forward to, the ghost hunt. We had been given free rein around the house to look and interact with any spirits we may encounter.

There had been a few words here and there but nothing that was concrete evidence that the spirts were among us. It could all be explained or passed off as a coincidence until I heard Scarlett and Grayson in the bathroom.

“Shotzi, yn come here quick.”

We entered the bathroom and were met with both Scarlett and Graysom standing in the bathtub. We join them without question and wait.

“Can you tell us your name” Scarlett asks the spirits

“Zach”

“Zach is there anyone else here with you?” She continues

“No”

“Killed her.”

“Sorry”

Scared, I find myself gravitating towards Grayson who instinctively grabs my hand. I’m not sure if he sensed my fear or if he too was scared however in that moment we were a comfort for each other.

“Killed who?” Shotzi asks this time. However there is no reply.

“Hey Zach can you say hello to Grayson?” She continues

In a mimicking tone

“Hi Grayson”

The mood is slightly lifted and I can’t help but chuckle this spirit has went from confessing to horrific crimes to making fun of Grayson and I’m here for it.

Unamused Grayson replies “oh, you think you’re funny do you?” The spirit did indeed think it was funny.

We move to a different room due to the activity in the bathroom dying down. The room we enter is a playroom, legend says that the small cupboard is where a small child still plays. We decide to have a game of rock paper scissors to see who will go in the cupboard. Shotzi is our first, then Scarlett.

“Can’t you just go in the cupboard? I think I would die of fear if I had to go in.” I say pleading with Grayson.

“Sorry love, fairs fair. Ready?” He replies.

Rock, paper, scissors shoot. I went with paper and Grayson well he went with rock. With a smug look I go stand next to Scarlett and Shotzi awaiting for Grayson to climb into the small cupboard.

“I’m literally in skinny jeans, I can’t do this.” He complains while backing into the small enclosed space. Not even a minute later he is screaming and scrambling to get out of the cupboard.

“Something touched me. Something touched my leg.”

“What?” We all ask.

“When I was in there I felt something grab and pull my leg.” He reiterates.

Finding his way next to me, he slides his hand into mine, again to find comfort. I squeeze his hand as a reassurance that everything was going to be okay. Looking down at me I can see the appreciation in his eyes.

Scarlett sits on the floor and asks the spirits some final questions - much to our dislike.

“Do you like Grayson?”

“No”

Grayson on hearing this throws a little tantrum

“I’m here, I’m trying to learn, I’m being respectful” before he can continue the spirt cuts him off

“Nerd”

The mood once again has been lifted at the expense of Grayson.

Shotzi continues to question the spirit.

“What about yn? Do you like her?”

“Yes”

“Pretty”

“You’re damn right she’s pretty. But ima have you ask you to back off mr ghost, she’s off limits.” Grayson replies

Shotzi and Scarlett share a knowing glance while i remain calm and composed- on the outside that is. On the inside im screaming.

That has got to be the most frightening experience of my life. The cameras have stopped rolling and we are standing in front of the Bloody Mary’s ready to part ways.

“Okay, I’ll admit it was kinda fun, however under no circumstances will I ever come back on your show.” I tell them.

They both laugh and tell me I’m a baby.

“I don’t know how I’m going to sleep tonight.”

Grayson jumps in “oh I don’t mind helping you out there. I can think of a few ways to help you sleep.”

Scarlett and Shotzi dismiss themselves sensing we need some time alone.

“What’s with the heavy flirting? You’ve been at it all night?” I question.

“Well what normally happens when a guy flirts with a girl?.”

“You’re not just any guy though, you’re Grayson Waller. Serial romancer.”

Slight offended he replies “I thought my actions would have been louder than my words? I like you yn, I like you a whole fucking lot. My mind, body and soul is captivated only by you.”

Silenced by his confession in struggle to think of the right words to say. I want to tell him I feel the same. I want to tell him how my every fibre and being yearns for him. Slowly I see the hope in his eyes fade as I’m taking too long to reply.

“Listen if you don’t feel the same way just say it I need to”

Before he could finish his sentence my lips meet his. He returns my kiss with a need and passion I’d only ever read in books. This is what he needed, this is what we both needed. Each other. Pulling away our foreheads rest on each other while catching our breath.

“How about a nightmare on elm street? A classic franchise to break that horror movie virginity of yours.”

He chuckles “as long as you’ll be there, I’ll watch anything.”

I honestly dunno what this turned into but here we are…….if you would like tagged in any of my stories let me know and I’ll add you to the list.

Tagged:

@jeysbae

@blueflowermentality

@co-sharkie

#wwe fanfiction #wwe x reader #wweedit #grayson waller x yn #grayson waller smut #grayson waller x reader #grayson waller imagine #grayson waller #grayson waller fan fiction #grayson waller x you #wwe x you #wwe imagine #wwe smut #wwe

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sweetbbarnes · 1 year

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The Interview | Bucky Barnes

Pairing: Boyfriend!Bucky Barnes x Celebrity!Fem!Reader

Summary: After directing a successful movie about Captain America’s life, the media seems to think that you and Steve Rogers would be the perfect match. Little do they know, your heart has already been taken by his best friend, the infamous ex-assassin James Barnes. And although you two are in a secret relationship and even secretly live together, when Bucky hears people talking about how you and Steve would be perfect for each other, his insecurity gets the best of him. But it’s okay, because you are determined to show your soldier just how much you love him. I got the inspiration to write this fic from the prompt “I don’t love you any less just because no one else can see it.” and also from the song I’ll Never Smile Again.

Warnings: Bucky is insecure (like, a lot) and self deprecating; jealousy (if you squint it); mentions of Bucky’s history and trauma; mentions of scars and past injuries; lots of feelings; lots of fluff; swearing; pet names; alcohol is mentioned; sexual themes, slight sub!bucky and dom!reader, allusions to dom!bucky and sub!reader (they kind of switch, idk how to explain), oral sex (m receiving), unprotected sex, the smut is written in both Bucky and reader perspectives; please let me know if I missed anything.

This is a +18 work. Minors DNI.

English is not my first language.

I do not consent to have this fic translated, copied or published to any other sites/apps. Do not steal my work.

I don’t understand anything about filmmaking so this is entirely based on information I read on google.

A/N: this is the first fic I post here as well as the first time I try writing something in english and I’m actually really nervous about sharing it, but I liked it a lot so I decided to post. Also I had no idea smut was so hard to write, so I’m sorry if it’s not that good, I promise I tried my best.

Word Count: 7.0k

“So, this is your first time directing a project after years working as an actress. How was this experience?” Bucky hears the interviewer’s voice. After your debut as a director with a movie about Steve Rogers’ life, you’ve been going to a lot of interviews — most of them with Steve, like this one — and as much as Bucky sees you everyday, he also enjoys watching them when you’re not home and he misses you. He likes to see your eyes shining a little brighter when you talk passionately about your work, the polite smile on your lips while you pay attention to the questions, the sweet voice you use to answer them, the way your eyebrow arches a little bit in annoyance when interviewers bring up irrelevant subjects.

“You’re aware that I literally live with you, right? You don’t have to watch those to see me.” You had joked the first time you caught him doing it. But Bucky just likes to see his girlfriend, even if it’s through a screen. Today is no different, so he sits there on the couch, listening closely while you answer the question, looking gorgeous as always.

“Well, it was definitely challenging. Not only was it my first attempt at directing, but the whole premise of the film was different from everything I’ve ever worked on, you know, ‘cause telling a fictional story is one thing, but telling the story of a real person is something else completely. It takes a lot of responsibility. But it was good, I felt a sense of independence that I never had as an actress. If I didn’t like something or if it didn’t feel right, I could just change it.”

“While we’re on the subject, Captain Steve Rogers, how was it like to have someone make a movie about your life?”

Steve smiles confidently at the man, already so used to this celebrity life that he barely resembles the shy, introverted kid Bucky knew in the 40’s.

“I mean, there’s a whole exhibition about me in a museum, so it’s not like my life is a secret,” the three of you laugh at the joke “but it was easier than I thought it would be. When Y/N first told me about it, she said that she didn’t want to simply tell Captain Americas’ story, everybody knows it, anyway.” He shrugs, and it’s true, everybody knows about the skinny boy from Brooklyn who took a supersoldier serum, lost his best friend, sacrificed himself and then was frozen for years just to wake up in a totally different world than the one he grew up in. But what no one knew — at least before the movie — is who Steve Rogers was before the serum, what changed and what stayed the same after he took it, or what it was like to wake up to a world he knew nothing about and how, exactly, this whole situation affected him. And that’s exactly what you had intended to show. Not how Steve Rogers became Captain America, but how Captain America changed Steve Rogers - avoiding topics that were too personal, of course.

“She had a totally different approach than what I am used to, and it was fun. It also helped that she did a really good job with it!” The blond continued.

“She really did, the film is amazing! It shows us a more human side of you, not only the hero, but also the person behind it. At least when I watched it, I got to understand a lot of things that I’d never stopped to think about before and ended up feeling more connected to the person that helps protect us everyday.” The interviewer agrees with Steve, and you thank both of them with a huge grin. “By the way you talk, Captain, I am assuming you were present through the entire production?”

“Yeah, whenever I wasn’t on missions. She wanted to stick to the truth as much as possible, so I got to check every information before it was added to the movie, and also chat a little with the actors.”

“So,” the man says your name, “everybody wants to know, how was it like working with the world’s favorite superhero?”

“First of all, don’t fool yourselves, Captain America is a pain in the ass.” You say, earning a loud laugh from the interviewer as Steve feigns an offended look. Bucky agrees with you.

“I am not! And you should watch your language, miss. There are children watching this!” the blond exclaims. He’s laughing but it’s clear that he’s serious about the language thing.

“See?” You say, pointing to Steve since he just proved your point “The lectures are endless!” You roll your eyes playfully, and proceed to answer the question seriously. “Steve and I were already friends before everything, so yeah, it was pretty normal. The only difference is that we had to see each other a lot more than usual.”

“Since you talked about your relationship before the film, rumor is that you two are very close. So the internet is wondering, maybe there is something more than just friendship?” The interviewer asks in a suggestive tone. What the fuck?

Bucky watches as your smile falters and Steve’s eyes widen, both your reactions showing that this is an unexpected question. His heart starts to beat quickly as you answer with a dry “our friendship is strictly platonic”, but the soldier doesn’t wanna hear any more of that conversation. How dare the man ask something like that? And also, what does he mean with “the internet is wondering”? Does the internet think you and Steve are a couple? You and Steve? You and his fucking best friend? No, you are Bucky’s girlfriend. Okay, the internet doesn’t know that. And, alright, hiding the relationship was his idea in the first place, because of how the media sees him and how it could affect your career, but part of the agreement between you two was that you would never talk about your romantic life publicly, so you always make it clear that relationship talk during interviews is off limits, and it enrages him that someone would disrespect your boundaries like that. And again, you and Steve?

Bucky’s head is spiraling when he grabs his phone - that you teached him how to use - and searches for your name plus Steve Rogers. And that’s when he sees it. Gossip blogs suggesting that the two are dating and talking about how it would be the “perfect couple”, videos of you and Steve gazing at each other’s eyes and touching each other’s arms during interviews - Bucky knows those looks and touches were innocent, but apparently some people are really good at taking things out of context. There’s also photoshopped pictures of you two holding hands, hugging, kissing-

He doesn’t notice when the interview ends. He knows you and Steve are not together, but seeing all of those things made him sick to his stomach. And he felt his heart being ripped from his chest when he realized that you and Rogers would, indeed, make the perfect couple. Steve, the world’s first and favorite superhero, the one who carries the stars and stripes, the blond-hair-blue-eyes personification of perfection, and you, a hero that fights for justice, not with guns or a shield, but instead using all the power and influence you have to bring attention to the truth and try to help those in need. And Bucky? A brainwashed ex-assassin, hydra’s failed experiment, a broken man with a weapon instead of an arm and according to many people, a black hole instead of a heart. That’s why you couldn’t tell anyone about this relationship, because Bucky is not and will never be perfect for you. You are the best thing that’s ever happened to him, and he doesn’t deserve you.

“Hey, babe!” You greet your boyfriend, entering the house you two share after a long day of meetings and interviews. You love what you do, but some days can be very stressful, today being one of them. After that fiasco of an interview that gave you and your agent a huge headache, you’re just glad you’re finally home with Bucky.

The brunet is sitting at the couch, elbows resting on his knees and head between his hands. Realizing he’s probably anxious or stuck in his own mind again, you walk over to this large frame, hold his wrists - flesh and metal - and move them away from his face. He’s a little startled with the sudden interaction, but relaxes as soon as he sees your warming smile.

“Hi, love.” You say, quietly, your heart breaking when you see the hurt in his beautiful blue eyes. "What 's wrong?”

“Nothing.” He immediately tries to hide his expression with a fake grin. “Nothing’s wrong, sweets.” And gives you a peck kiss.

His lie doesn’t fool you, because you know Bucky, and you can tell when he’s upset. If not for his posture when you came in and his pained expression, then for the way he didn’t greet you like he usually does, with a tight hug and a hot open-mouthed kiss that screams how much he missed you as the touch-starved man he is. But you also know that sometimes your boyfriend needs space, when he starts to drown himself in guilt or remembers all the torture and loss he was put through, and will only talk about it when he’s ready, if he wants to talk about it at all. These times, all you can do is remind him that you’re here, until he feels comfortable enough to speak, or until he gets better on his own without the need to verbalize the horrors inside his head.

You sit by his side and tangle your fingers in his hair, massaging his scalp softly. He leans into the touch and tells you how his day was when you ask him - avoiding the interview topic, because he doesn’t want to talk about that right now.

Bucky knows you can tell when he hides something. But he also knows that you are patient and loving and understanding, so when he doesn't want to talk about his feelings, you wouldn’t force him. Most days he’s glad for that, but today he wishes you had seen through his bullshit and just canceled dinner despite what he said.

“Do you want to call off dinner tonight? It’s okay if you do.” You had said while you two were still sitting on the couch, earlier today.

“No, it’s okay.” He answered, shaking his head.

You pursed your lips. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I’m sure.”

Now, as you talk happily with Natasha, Sam and Steve, Bucky can’t stop the anxiety in his chest. In fact, it gets a tiny bit worse every time you and his best friend talk about the movie or the interviews, joke about something that happened on set that he doesn’t understand or even when you two went to grab the wine bottle at the same time and your hands touched- Okay, Bucky’s definitely going insane. You are Steve’s friend. Friends talk and joke and share innocent touches. But it still hurts, because Steve would be better for you. If not Steve, then someone else who’s not a traumatized murderer that will only take you down with him and-

“..., right, love?” You squeeze Bucky’s thigh, bringing his attention back to the table.

He stares at you blankly, unaware of what was going on around him.

“Yeah- yeah, right.” Bucky mumbles, and then gets up from his seat. He can’t stay here anymore. “I have to go… grab something.”

After excusing yourself from the table, you find your boyfriend leaning against the kitchen counter, arms crossed and eyes closed.

“Why didn’t you ask me to cancel dinner if you’re not feeling okay?” Your tone is sweet when you ask, there’s no judgment, only genuine worry.

“I am feeling okay.” He lies without opening his eyes.

“I know you’re not. You wanna tell me what’s wrong?” you try again, calmly.

“It’s just-” Bucky huffs, unfolding his arms to rub his flesh hand against his face. “You and Steve.”

You tilt your head in confusion. “What about me and Steve?”

“I’ve seen the interview, and what people are saying about you two on the internet.” he answers, finally looking at you.

“Oh, baby, it doesn’t matter-” You try to shrug it off, because it really doesn’t matter to you, but he interrupts.

“No, it does.”

His sudden interruption surprises you a little bit, but you don’t let it upset you. You know Bucky struggles to express his feelings sometimes. “Why?”

He just averts his gaze, putting on a sarcastic expression like he always does when he gets defensive. But there’s only one reason why Bucky would get defensive.

“Are you jealous?” You ask curiously, not mocking or teasing, just wanting to understand.

“I’m not-” There’s a little pause in which he seems to be considering his own feelings. “No, I’m not jealous.”

“Then what’s the problem, babe? You know Steve and I are not together.”

“It’s just that maybe you should, y’know.” Instead of explaining something, he just confuses you more with his words, uttered with such naturality as if it was the most obvious thing. If you weren’t so disoriented by this conversation, you’d be thinking that Bucky could make a great actor by how he’s good at hiding his emotions sometimes.

“What did you say?”

“I said maybe you two should be together. He knows you for longer than I do.” Bucky tries to come up with an excuse to what he just said, not wanting to explain his real motives.

“That’s not a reason- You’re not making any sense.” You say, still calm, trying to understand the situation as best as you can, because you have no idea why he would suggest something like that.

“Or maybe not Steve, but someone like him.” He continues, ignoring your confused look. But you can see that his defensiveness is slowly breaking.

“Someone like him? Bucky, what do you mean with all that?”

You really try to make sense of what he’s saying, but you can’t, because what the fuck is happening?

Then you see it. The way his Adam's apple moves up and down, his mouth tilts slightly downwards and both his hands clench in fists. But even if you didn’t know his body language so well, you’d still notice the searing pain emanating from his eyes.

“Someone that’s not broken. Someone that’s good, a hero. A person that you wouldn’t have to hide.” He whispers.

You can swear your heart has been ripped off your chest when the words sink in, the ones he said and the ones you know are eating his mind even though he didn’t say them out loud — I’m a burden. I’ll never be good enough. I’ll always have to be a secret, because people think I’m a monster. Because sometimes I think I’m a monster — and you finally understand his demeanor. But before you can say anything, Steve appears at the kitchen door, a concerned look in his eyes “Everything okay?”

Bucky immediately stiffens up and heads towards his friend, once again building up his walls. He can barely explain himself to you, he doesn’t need Steve to be added to the conversation. “Yeah, everything’s fine, pal.”

You watch as the man you love makes his way out of the kitchen and back to the dinner table, a lot of feelings making their way up your chest. You are worried, of course, but also hurt that Bucky could consider the possibility of letting you go to someone else and a little indignant that he thinks you are capable of loving another person as much as you love him. And you know that Bucky has a complicated past and it’s not your obligation to heal him entirely, but you can’t help but feel slightly disappointed in yourself, because even after two years trying to prove to him whenever you could that he is loved by you and he’s worthy of it, you still couldn’t get rid of those doubts that ate his mind every now and then.

After you two started dating, you made sure to always be honest about your feelings, constantly telling him that you love him, that you’re not gonna leave him, that you don’t care about what he’s done as the winter soldier, ‘cause it was never his choice, that he is enough and that yes, you truly think that he’s attractive and handsome and beautiful and hot and perfect even with the metal arm.

The first time he got back from a mission unconscious and heavily injured, you didn’t leave his side for even one second, terrified of losing him, until he woke up and the doctors assured you three times that he was going to be okay. Then you made your agent cancel all of your appointments for the next week and brought him to your house to take care of his wounds until there was no trace of them in any part of his body, even though he said you didn’t have to and that the serum would heal him. Before he got back to his old apartment, you made him promise that he would try to never do that again.

When you noticed that he never took off his shirt during sex, you had asked to see his scars and although he was insecure about it at first, he ended up trusting you. You remember gently tracing all the scarred skin, then kissing every inch where your fingers had touched, trying to show that he didn’t have to hide himself from you.

When he got unsure about how serious the relationship was and you noticed he was scared you would leave him, you asked him to move in with you, wanting to prove how serious you are about this.

Was all of that not enough to make him believe you? Does he still think you’re not serious when you rearrange your entire schedule after he gets back from missions just to be with him for a little longer? Does he think you’re lying when you talk about your love for him? When you do everything he needs to help him deal with the pain — even if what he needs is space and it kills you to be apart while he’s feeling depressed? What about all the times you gave yourself to him entirely, at late nights when your need for each other was so deep that you both let go of control?

No. You bury those insecurities at the back of your mind. You’re not gonna let them take over, you know you love Bucky and you’re gonna keep trying to prove it to him every single day, even if a part of him never believes you.

When you meet Steve at the door, he lowers his tone and points to his best friend. “Is this about the interview?”

“Kind of.” You sigh. “I’ll talk to him later.”

The rest of the dinner is fine. Bucky’s still quiet, he thought that he would feel better after taking everything out of his chest, but he somehow feels worse now. Steve shoots worried glances at both you and Bucky every now and then, but continues talking and joking like he was before. If Sam or Natasha noticed that you had a sadness in your eyes that wasn’t there before, none of them said anything.

“We know you're super important and busy, but don’t forget about us, mere mortals, alright?” Sam jokes, and you laugh before closing the door with a smile, saying goodbye to your friends. Mere mortals, yeah.

You sigh, making your way back to the kitchen, where your boyfriend had retreated to after saying a quick goodbye, a few minutes earlier. You’re aware that Bucky’s supersoldier senses pick up on your presence as soon as you enter the room, but he doesn’t say a word while he washes the dishes. You just stay there for a few minutes, watching how the muscles in his back flex with the movement of his arms, how the tight black shirt outlines his body, covering his torso, his biceps, the scars that you had seen and felt so many times before. God, you love him so much, and you’re gonna prove it to him. Over and over again, until he quits trying to push you away.

A famous song from the 40’s starts to play on the speaker, and you take the moment to get closer and wrap your arms around his waist, resting your hands on his stomach. You place your chin on the crook of his neck and start to sing softly right next to his ear.

“I’ll never smile again Until I smile at you I’ll never laugh again What good would it do?”

Bucky stops what he’s doing. You know he loves when you hug him from behind and whisper in his ear.

“For tears would fill my eyes My heart would realize That our romance is through”

Bucky closes his eyes to enjoy the moment and lets out a shaky breath when you place a kiss on his shoulder before continuing to sing.

“I'll never love again I'm so in love with you I'll never thrill again To somebody new”

Instinctively, he places his hands on top of yours. Both of them are cold, one due to the metal, the other due to the water, but you don’t care.

“Within my heart I know I will never start To smile again Until I smile at you”

You two stay like this for some minutes, eyes closed, bodies touching, the smell of the shampoo he used to wash his hair earlier filling your senses. When the song ends, Bucky turns in your arms to face you and whispers your name. But before he can say anything, you grab his face between your two hands.

“You are not broken. You are good. You are my hero. And I don’t love you any less just because no one else can see it.” You say firmly, one hundred percent sure of your words.

He still tries to argue, though.

“But I am-”

“You know what you are, Barnes? You are the love of my life. And I know I’m supposed to be patient and understanding, and let you figure things out on your own, but I can’t do it this time. I’m not gonna let another second pass with you thinking that Steve, or anyone else, would be better for me, ‘cause this is not true.”

Bucky lets out a heavy breath.

“I- I don’t- I’m not-” but he can’t find the words. Why won’t you see what he’s trying to show you?

You soften your eyes when you take in his expression. Bucky is on the verge of tears, mouth trembling, and it breaks your heart to see your soldier in so much pain because of stupid things people were typing on the internet - about him, about you, about your love life.

“What about you see what I am trying to show you?” You whisper, and only then he realizes he had said that out loud. “Because I’m trying to show you that I love you more than anything. All of you. The good parts and the bad ones. All your smiles and all your scars. And there’s nothing you can say, or do, that will make me stop adoring everything about you.”

You connect your lips with his before he has time to argue. It’s a loving kiss, slow and gentle, carrying every single feeling that burns inside your chest, communicating everything you want him to know - that you love him unconditionally, that you’re not gonna judge him for who he is, that you are his and he is yours. He reciprocates with the same amount of tenderness and love.

“I’m sorry.” He whispers when you break the kiss. “I just want what’s best for you.”

“It’s okay, love.” You whisper. “I know.”

And you crash your lips with his again, not so gentle this time.

Now that you managed to push his insecurities away, Bucky finally allows the familiar need for you to emerge once again. He lifts his flesh hand to the back of your head, holding it strongly while his tongue invades your mouth without any warning and he sucks on your lower lip. Even though you two had sex many times before, he always feels so desperate, never once failing to show you just how hungry he is for you. You break the kiss to giggle when he uses his metal hand to grip your hip with strength enough to leave a mark, but not to truly hurt you. Bucky would never hurt you.

“So eager to someone that just tried to break up with me.” You tease.

“Can’t even remember why I thought that was a good idea.” He places wet kisses through your jaw and neck. Bucky knows his insecurities are never gone that easily, and some of them will probably come back later to haunt his peace, but right now it doesn’t matter, because right now he wants you and he’ll do anything to get what he wants.

“Oh, something about how I should ditch you for Steve.”

“Let’s not talk about it. It was ridiculous.” He mumbles, feeling his self control slowly fade away with every touch of his lips on your skin. Talking is the less thing he wants to do, but apparently he’ll have to.

“Why? You don’t like the thought of your best friend doing this to me?” You ask with a smug smile, gesturing between you two.

Bucky stops what he’s doing and looks at you exasperated.

“Please don’t say this kind of thing ever again.”

“What? You wanted me to date Steve and thought we wouldn’t get intimate if we were together?” You ask, amused with his expression.

Actually, I haven’t thought about that part. Bucky sighs after he realizes you’re trying to not so subtly remind him of how absurd his idea was.

“Alright, I get it. It was stupid. Will you drop it now?” He pleads, feeling more frustrated each second that passes with him not being inside of you. Especially after your outrageous suggestion.

“It was stupid.” You’re aware of his desperation but choose to ignore it until he understands. “Promise you’ll never do that again?”

“Feeling insecure? I don’t think I can control that.�� He mumbles.

“Assuming that you’re not worthy.” You tuck a strand of his short hair behind his ear. “It’s okay to feel insecure, really. But when you do, please just tell me, and I’ll remind you of how much I love you.”

You are not broken. You are good.

“Okay.” He whispers with a hoarse voice.

Bucky tries to kiss you again, but you hold his face a few inches away from you. Goddammit, woman!

“Promise?” You whisper, still refusing to give him what he wants. You need to hear him say it.

“I promise, sweets.” He answers, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. “Now can I please kiss you?”

His plea sends a jolt of electricity straight to your core. Oh, you absolutely love when Bucky Barnes begs for you. Instead of answering with words, you return your mouth to his in a passionate kiss, with your arms around his neck.

Suddenly, the only thing that Bucky can think about is you, the delicious taste of your lips, the softness of your hair entangled between his flesh fingers, the tempting sounds you’re letting out against his mouth, the seductive touch of your skin on his skin-

“Want you so bad.” He murmurs in a rough voice, and before he realizes, he’s pushing you to your shared bedroom, never taking his mouth away from yours.

“Don’t worry, babe, I’m gonna take care of you.” You break the kiss to answer, making your intentions clear. You rarely act dominant during sex, but when you want to, you can get him to do pretty much anything you ask. That’s how much power you have over him, and although Bucky usually likes to be the one in charge, he sometimes enjoys being reminded that you have him entirely in the palm of your hand. And you certainly like to remind him that he can let go of his imposing behavior every once in a while. You drag your hands through his muscular stomach under the shirt, pronouncing the next words in a demanding voice. “Take your clothes off, Barnes.”

Knowing better than to disobey you, he undresses himself under your gaze. You had seen him naked countless times before, but you still take a moment to admire, and Bucky feels like he might die when your eyes travel slowly through his entire body, from the beautiful blue eyes, to the swollen lips, through the scarred skin where meat meets metal and his defined stomach, lingering on his muscular thighs and already hard length, then his legs and feet, and finally back to his eyes.

“Will I get to see you naked too?” He asks, already feeling smaller. Well, for a man that’s used to taking you by the waist, pushing you into the bed and easily ripping your clothes off, asking this kind of thing definitely makes him look smaller. Submissive. But it’s a good feeling.

“I’ll think about it.” You shrug and push his chest gently to make him sit on the bed. With him sitting down, slightly leaning back, and you standing on your feet between his legs, you look powerful, and it arouses him. You smirk, noticing his expression. “But tonight is about you. Gotta show my pretty boy how much I love him.”

Bending over just a little bit to reach his face, you start to kiss his cheeks, then the corner of his lips, his jaw and neck, all of that while lightly running your fingernails over his bare thighs. Bucky tries to hold back a groan.

“Don’t hold back your noises.” You whisper next to his ear, immediately catching on his shyness. He can feel your warm breath as you speak, and it sends shivers down his whole body. “Wanna hear you, my love.”

The man barely hears you, focusing on the feel of your nails on his skin. He loves it. He loves you. He wants you to touch his entire body with your hands and lips. He wants to be inside of you right now-

Bucky lets out a louder groan this time, and you happily continue your trail of kisses, on his shoulders, down to his stomach, until you’re on your knees in front of him, face to face with his thick cock, a little bit of pre-come already making its way down his reddened tip.

“Hands behind your back.” You order, using your arms to open his legs wider.

Leaning on his elbows, Bucky looks down at you startled. He’s not strong enough to keep himself from touching you while you give him a blow job. He utters your name in an almost whine, trying to argue, but a single look from you with arched eyebrows makes him shut up and obey. This is gonna be a hell of a long night, he thinks.

His dick gets impossibly harder when you pepper light kisses through his inner thighs and then bite and lick the same spots, so close from where he needs you, but still not touching it. “Sweetheart.”

“Yes?”

“I need you.” He mutters.

“What do you need me to do, Bucky?” You feign innocence, knowing exactly what he wants, but waiting for him to ask.

“Need you to- need your mouth.” He begs. “Please.”

Delicious noises emerge from his throat as soon as you start to slowly slide your tongue through his entire length with your mouth wide open, staring at his lust-filled eyes as you go. He clenches his jaw tightly when you wrap your lips around his tip, circling the sensitive area with your tongue. He grunts as he tries really hard not to jerk his hips up, and you take your time sucking and licking his tip, enjoying the reactions too much to rush this.

“Fuck.” He hisses. “Feels so good.”

He watches in awe as you guide one of his legs to rest on your shoulder. He wants to tell you that he’s too heavy and you don’t have to do that, but the words are lost in the dizziness of his brain when you take him so deep inside your mouth that his tip reaches the back of your throat. Rolling his eyes involuntarily, the only thing going through Bucky’s head is how heavenly you feel as you take him like this.

His cock is so thick and hard, and as you start bobbing your head up and down you can’t help the feeling that you’ll never have enough of him. You dig your nails into the thigh that’s resting on your shoulder and use the other hand to wrap his base, since he still doesn’t fit entirely inside your mouth. The almost pornographic sounds your boyfriend is making encourage you to fasten your movements, sucking harder and sending pleasure through every single nerve on his body. You let out a moan, and he almost loses it with the vibration it provides.

“Want to- fuck- gonna come.” He mumbles, throwing his head back with eyes screwed shut.

You take your mouth off his size with a loud pop and warn “Don’t.” Before going back to your motions.

In order to obey, Bucky tries to think about random, non filthy things like dolphins or wood tables or apples. He’s definitely not thinking about what you’re doing, the warmth of your mouth around his dick, the delicious pain of your fingernails scratching the back of his thigh, the way your pretty lips are deliciously sucking-

“I can’t-” He whines, involuntarily yanking his hips up. But the only thing you do is mutter a short “yes, you can” and place the hand that was involving his base on his lower stomach, silently ordering him to stay still.

The room is filled with his shaky breaths as he gathers every ounce of willpower that’s left to hold back his release. He wants so badly to please you, to make you proud and earn those sweet praises he knows you’ll whisper to him once you’re satisfied with his success.

When Bucky’s leg starts to tremble violently and you know he won’t be able to contain himself anymore if you keep going, you let go of him completely, standing on your feet once again. But before he can complain about the orgasm denial, you shut him up with a chaste kiss.

“I’m gonna fuck you now, okay, baby?” you whisper against his lips, and laugh seductively when he tries to lift his hands to your hips. You hold his wrists before he reaches you. “Didn’t say you could touch me yet.”

He whines, but that’s all he can do about it. Aware of his struggle to keep his hands away, you start to take your clothes off, piece by piece. And don’t get me wrong, Bucky enjoys seeing you all dressed up in your fancy clothes and expensive shoes, he really does, but he absolutely loves the sight of you without any of them. The soldier keeps looking at you in adoration while you make him lay down and straddle him, holding both his wrists above his head.

“But I wanna touch you.” Bucky protests as soon as he notices what you’re doing, but doesn’t make any motion to move his hands off your grasp, even though he could easily do that. Instead, he tries to win you over with his words. “Wanna put my fingers inside that pretty lil’ pussy of yours. Wanna taste you. Make you come on my metal hand and then on my face-”

“Nice try, Barnes.” you interrupt before you actually give in to his suggestions. “But tonight it’s my turn to take care of you. Gotta remind you that you’re mine,” you lower your lips to his ear “and that I love you very, very much.”

You don’t wait for a response before you buckle your hips down, feeling his rock hard length between your wet folds. Both of you moan with the contact.

“So you’re gonna keep your hands where they are until I say otherwise, okay?”

Bucky nods, giving up his efforts because he’s simply desperate to just be inside you as soon as possible. With the confirmation, you bring both of your hands to lay on his chest and position the tip of his cock in your entrance, teasing a bit just to watch his lips tremble with anticipation. Inch by inch, you push your hips down on him, taking deep breaths to control yourself and keep the slow pace. Bucky provides you with quite the sight, eyes squeezed shut and lips slightly parted, his face is covered in red, the veins from his forehead are clearly visible under the skin and his hair is matted in a sweaty mess while he takes shallow breaths, waiting for you to go all the way down.

The thought that you could turn a man like Bucky Barnes — always so headstrong and stoic, walking around with a scowl and giving people those sarcastic scoffs — into a panting mess beneath you makes pleasure travel from the pit of your stomach to your core. There is something very sensual about the fact that the super soldier could easily bend you down to fuck you senseless (like he’s done many times), but allows you to have all the power anyway. More than allowing you, he wants you to have it, craves to surrender entirely under your strings. This man, who’s so desperate for control all the time, trusts you enough to let you dominate him completely. This knowledge at the same time makes your heart ache with love and the lower part of your belly tremble with bliss.

“You look so good beneath me, baby. All blushy and wild.” You praise, and the only thing his mind can think of as a response is more moans. The sounds are like music to your ears. A loud, obscene melody.

Finally, you take all of him, and Bucky succumbs to the feeling of your soft walls wrapping around his length. Not able to restrain his wish anymore, he begins to vigorously yank his hips up, trying to bury as much of himself as possible inside of you. You lose yourself in the intense feeling as his cock rubs over and over against that delicious spot that makes you see stars, and that deliciously familiar sensation starts to prickle under your skin.

The knuckles on his right hand are white from gripping the sheets with so much strength when he mutters under his breath. “Let me- Please, let me touch you.”

Having him beg for you is nice, but how are you supposed to say no when his request is so tempting? You hold his wrists and bring them to your waist. Without losing a moment, he immediately squeezes your boobs, pinches your nipples and then moves to grip your hips like his life depends on it, helping you with your motions as they’ve already started to become erratic.

Finally feeling your skin on his hands, Bucky feels his cock throbbing inside your cunt, and he knows he’s not gonna last much longer. “Gonna come. Can I come?”

“Yes, baby. Let go for me. I’ve got you.” You dug your nails on his shoulder blades, that delicious pressure starts to build up in your lower belly upon watching your composed soldier arch his back with pleasure, mouth open wide in an ‘O’ shape. “You’re such a good boy, baby. So fucking good to me”

Soon, excruciating pleasure crashes through Bucky’s body, and he feels himself falling off the edge as he fills you up with the product of his orgasm, panting violently while calling your name. Arousal courses through your veins with the scene, and it doesn’t take much for you to reach your own peak, rolling your eyes and feeling your body burn from inside out as your walls clench around his cock. You keep the unstable movement of your hips, prolonging both of your orgasms until the two of you come down from the high.

Feeling a little dizzy from your post-orgasmic haze, you plop down on his shoulder to catch your breath, hearing the loud thumps of his rapidly beating heart. He places a sweet kiss on your temple and starts to stroke your hair. You two stay like this for some minutes, silently waiting for your pants to turn into steady breaths.

You need to hold back a whimper at the sudden emptiness when you get off of him to lay down by his side and look at his shiny blue orbs. You cup his sweaty face and stroke his cheekbone.

“You’re the only person in the world that can make me feel like this.” You whisper, and he understands what you mean.

He gives your thumb a light kiss and smiles softly. “I know. I’m sorry that I forgot it for a moment.”

“It’s okay, love. I’ll be pleased to remind you again and again, every single time you forget.” You grin and place a kiss to the top of his nose. “You’re not getting rid of me that easily."

And at this moment Bucky thinks that although he would never be perfect for you in society's eyes, he doesn’t care anymore. Yeah, he may not be the most admirable and put-together man that walks on this earth, but maybe what he is can be enough. Maybe the efforts he makes everyday with the sole intention of being a better man for you — even though not always successful — are enough. Maybe loving you with all his heart and trusting you unconditionally is enough. Perhaps one day the world will finally see him as something other than a monster and you will finally be able to tell the world that he is yours — like he knows you want to do —, but while it doesn't happen, he is satisfied to have only you thinking he’s worthy and good. Because, at the end of the day, you are the one that matters. You will always be the only one that matters.

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes #bucky x female reader #bucky barnes fanfic #insecure!bucky #jealous!bucky #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes smut #sub!bucky #bucky barnes angst #bucky x y/n #james bucky barnes #boyfriend!bucky #sweetbbarnesfics

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endlich-allein · 2 months

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"A Serbian website, kurir.rs, interviewed Zoran Bihać during his visit to Belgrade's FEST film festival. Among others, Zoran discusses Rammstein, his work with the band and Till's solo projects, provides details on why he stopped working with Rammstein explains the story behind the videos for "Platz Eins" and "Till the End". He also shares an intimate story of Till Lindemann's visit to his mother's house. Excerpts:

"Till pushed me, I pushed him, we were a perfect symbiosis, but a bit brutal. I worked with him honestly and wholeheartedly, and he with me. What he's doing now with other people is like Rammstein from Ali Express. He sees that too, but he only says it out loud when he gets drunk."

"When he went into a solo project, it was in a way the breakup with Rammstein. That's why I wanted to do videos for his independent project in a completely different way. I made a music video for the song "Praise Abort" with a message explaining that situation. The video starts with "Rammstein Till" and then "solo Till" comes in with a pig face and kicks him off the stage. A lot of people didn't understand that. After working on Till's solo project, the other members of the band told me that I would no longer do Rammstein videos. They couldn't handle Till's success without them. So they decided to stop working with me. Till knew that, but I didn't, that was the price I had to pay."

"People only see what is brutal, the scenes from that video ("Till the End" - ed. note) are images from their nightmares. They don't see what I wanted to say with such a video. It is a story about a man who is always hungry and, no matter how much he eats, he cannot be satisfied. And he is the loneliest man in the world and he cannot find the love he is looking for. A lot of people understood that, but we didn't want to offend anyone with erotica, but only to cause a shock. It created a lot of problems for me in Germany, several jobs were cancelled."

Photo: Dado Djilas"

Rammwiki

#not agree with 'rammstein from ali express'#till lindemann #lindemann #t.lindemann #rammstein #zoran bihac #rammstein in press

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pop-punklouis · 1 year

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OKAY so i have lots of thoughts but i think the main takeaway that really sat with me throughout the film and even after is that so much of this documentary was about feeling. when you strip back the content regardless of how one perceived the film, it’s obvious that AOTV was a cathartic release for louis. it’s something he has wanted to put out for a long time. and when you really look into his career arc throughout the band and into solo territory, so much of his thoughts and feelings and words had been minced or sanitized or completely overshadowed by others whether that’s through his image or the media etc. he’s never been able to sit down in a room and just freely speak openly about his inner struggles/outer struggles and it come from his own mouth without worry of someone taking his words out of context or cutting them up for a headline. there’s a sense of vulnerability that fills up a lot of space in the documentary. you hear it in his voice. you see it on his face. you feel it in his body language and how he crafts his words. being able to bring the audience into areas of his life where he felt the most insecure or afraid and lead them through it to where he ultimately feels “deserving” of what he has in a satisfying yet human way is something i believe was difficult for him to do, but he does it with so much grace and strength.

and i think working through this documentary and flipping through these pages in his life regardless of if it was a speed run at times or lingered for a bit longer, is cleansing for him. for the first time in his career this documentary gives him access to be able to take off the tape and just. feel. not only privately but publicly. he’s at a place where he wants to open up his chest to fans and anyone who wants to listen in a way that still protects his privacy and personal life (and still sets a narrative) but tells bits of his inner dialogue about his career and personal reflection in the way he ultimately wants to tell it. and even though we know louis humanity already, there is a deeper and rawer look at his humanity (especially in the first half of the film) that grows throughout the footage. in the absence of words you’re able to perceive how human he is. you’re able to strip away that louis tomlinson™️ vision (for better or for worse) that we all know, love, and have independently created and just see him become more and more human which is something that truly impacted me the more i observed him outside of the interviews. the candid moments. the quick shots. the personal venting. the adrenaline high after performing. the words spoken into the void after certain life circumstances occurred. how he carries himself and has grown into himself the past 10+ years. they’re all small details but it snowballs into so much feeling and catharsis from himself and the viewers watching. he should be so proud of what he is and who he is. he’s always been deserving but i’m so happy he now personally feels like he can say that and feel that out loud. just lovely

#i’m just!!!!#i have many other thoughts but that’s the one i wanted to get down first bc yeah ❤️‍🩹

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joesalw · 5 months

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You really can't write this shit lmao...

TS's friend group consists of Miss 'idc about genocide and continue to employ a bloodthirsty zionist CEO for my makeup brand' and Cara D who's great grandfather created the Black and Tans which is a terrorist organisation that killed Irish people during the Irish War of Independence. A group that also sent their people to kill Palestinians in favor of establishing the state of Israel. Last night these 3 went to Ramy Youssef's (who Taylor probably met at the "Poor Things" premiere) comedy show in NYC and 100% of the proceeds would go to the Gaza relief fund. The thing is, Selena and Taylor are getting all the credit and praise for Ramy's activism. I've been a fan of her work for the past 10 years and her recent activities have turned me off of her completely. The turning point was that pathetic TIME interview.

I've always thought of her as this well-read individual who can masterfully express herself whether it would be public speaking or writing but I couldn't help but cringe while reading that article. She tries too hard to appeal to gen z and younger millennial crowd when she herself is practically pushing 40 atp. I feel like all of her 'intelligence' came from being around Joe Alwyn who's a notorious bookworm. The fact that she describes her Rep era as 'goth-punk' was the first strike, the 2016 hate train as a ' career death' was the 2nd and the whole patriarchy delusion she went into just hit the final nail in the coffin and I was like 'nope, not doing this shit anymore'.

I know that swifties have been comparing her to Beyonce lately saying things like 'well, Taylor writes her songs' or 'Beyonce can't read' and talking about how she doesn't give interviews so people don't know that she's dumb. And as a comparison I've found her Harper's Bazaar interview that she gave when she turned 40. And good God, I've slept on this woman for way too long. In the interview she talks about building her work ethic from an early age. The dedication of her life's decades (First decade was dedicated to dreaming, the teens were about the grind, the 20s were about building a strong foundation for her career and establishing her legacy, the 30s were about starting her family and prioritizing her own life over her career). She started her own management company at 27, in 2013 she started her charity foundation in which she helps hurricane relief, education, supporting minorities businesses, families with housing needs, water crises, pediatric health care and pandemic relief. She talks about expanding her business ventures beyond music industry, talks about setting boundaries in the world of celebrity culture, about her friends being a group of strong independent women, about the importance of mental health. She also says that she's most inspired by her parents ("My mother has always been my Queen and still is. She has always been so strong and is filled with humanity", "No matter how tired she was, she was always professional, loving, and nurturing."; "My father constantly encouraged me to write my own songs and create my own vision. He is the reason I wrote and produced at such a young age."). That woman is so well-spoken and genuine you can't help but feel warm while reading it and she doesn't feel the need of throwing unnecessary 'smart people' words to seem that way.

Reading Taylor's "Person of the Year" profile and Beyonce's 'Entering 40s' interview were completely different experiences. And as a result, one of them lost a fan and the other gained one. I wish Tree Paine would stop Taylor from giving these interviews because everytime she does, she comes across as tone-deaf, out of touch, mentally stuck overgrown teenager, try-hard bratty diva who can't stand being not the only one praised.

Anyway, I'd recommend to read the full interview and watching her new film. I've watched it yesterday and got the urge of turning my life around. That lady is truly such a light.

Taylor's friend list also includes 'Mr. and Mrs. plantation with slave cabins on the property wedding', 'a sex offender and a SA apologist as the newest addition', 'Ms. "I assaulted my own sister", ' an insecure and whiny music producer who likes to stir drama on Taylor's behalf'. And not to mention that she's dated a nazi this year and her newest flavour of the month is a fatphobic jock with a double digit iq, her father is also an avid republican voter. I think the people she surrounds herself with tell about her more than she does herself.

And concluding with two cents about Joe Alwyn. I'm glad she's out of his life. While I was a swiftie I've watched his interviews and he always came across as a very gentle, calm, well-spoken and a bit introverted man. And she's... well, her. I also think that she'd held him back in her job in regards of producers and directors not wanting their work to be overshadowed by 'Taylor's BF is in this' articles. I'm hoping he does more projects in the future or maybe dips his toes in writing and directing something because clearly he's a talented writer.

Sorry for the long rant, had to get it out of my system <3

I love reading your rants, keep it coming. they are so on point.

#anti taylor swift #swifties dni #joe alwyn

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mariacallous · 2 months

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When Russia first invaded Ukraine in 2014, annexing the Crimean Peninsula and bringing turmoil and destruction to Ukraine’s eastern regions, many people—both outside Ukraine and inside it—found it easier to ignore the violence unfolding in the country’s east than admit that war had returned to Europe. This included creative artists, who rarely mentioned the war in their works, not least because they feared scaring off the Russian fans who constituted much of their audience.

As Ukrainians all over the country woke up to explosions on Feb. 24, 2022, the truth could no longer be ignored: The “big war” had truly begun. Today, the country’s art is catching up to the truth of war.

Before 2022, few Ukrainian artists and entertainers openly mentioned the ongoing war in their works. In fact, many pop stars like Ivan Dorn or Luna continued to perform in Russia and created works aimed, first and foremost, at the Russian market and in the Russian language. When criticized for this by their Ukrainian fans, many dodged the subject, claimed to be “apolitical,” or explained their actions as “trying to build a bridge” between Russia and Ukraine.

“My music isn’t about politics, it’s about healing souls,” Luna said in a lengthy interview with Russian opposition journalist Xenia Sobchak in 2021. “That’s why I don’t pay attention to the critics back home trying to make me feel guilty for giving concerts in Russia.” Similarly, Dorn claimed that by interacting with Russian listeners he was “trying to capture as many people as possible with my music so that they would never attack my own country.”

But the main reasons were pragmatic ones: The large and relatively rich Russian market has long been attractive to Ukrainian performers, much like the American market for the English-speaking world. Making films or music built around a Ukrainian context could scare off Russian fans, so the overwhelming majority of content made in the 2000s and 2010s was tailored to sound and look as neutral as possible, devoid of any references to local events or personalities. There were, of course, notable exceptions.

Musicians, such as singer and veteran military paramedic Anastasiia Shevchenko, better known by her pseudonym СТАСІK, wrote songs openly referencing the war in their lyrics and music videos. Indie rapper Stas Koroliov released an entire album in 2021 of tracks inspired by the war and society’s apathy toward it. It contained lyrics like “I now understand that to become a messiah you just need to state the obvious: My homeland is at war with Russia.”

While mainstream comedies that wanted both Ukrainian and Russian box office sales steered clear of any references to recent domestic events, independent movies were more willing to process the violence taking place in Ukraine’s eastern regions and the loss of Crimea. Wartime dramas such as Tymur Yashchenko’s U311 Cherkasy (named after the naval mine sweeper blocked by Russian forces during the capture of Crimea) and Maryna Er Gorbach’s Klondike addressed specific events of the Russo-Ukrainian war, while Nariman Aliev’s 2019 drama Homeward was a meditation on what the loss of Crimea meant for its indigenous Tatar population. Other films, such as Volodymyr Tykhyi’s dramedy Our Kitties, tried to find humor amid the heartbreak and horrors faced by the Ukrainian soldiers stationed on the frontlines.

Everything changed in early 2022, when war—previously treated as a niche subject that was likely to scare off people looking for light entertainment—quickly became the only topic most Ukrainians were interested in. As missiles rained down, entertainers suddenly realized that they could not remain apolitical bystanders any longer.

Almost every popular musician spoke out against the invasion, with several (such as Dasha Astafieva and Vitaly Kozlovskiy) apologizing for performing in Russia and platforming their Russian colleagues in recent years. “I felt like a zombie while performing in Russia. I’d arrive, smile mechanically at everyone, do the set and return home. Russia has a lot of money but it’s a soulless place,” Astafieva wrote in a social media post shortly after the start of the full-scale invasion. Many artists—such as Antytila leader Taras Tolopya, singer Yarmak, and most of the lineup of cult Kharkiv-based hip-hop group TNMK—took up arms and joined the Armed Forces of Ukraine, while others took to volunteering by raising funds and sourcing equipment for Ukrainian soldiers, performing on the frontlines, or training as medics.

Some of their personal stories exemplified Ukraine’s modern civic identity, which has little to do with ethnicity or where you were born. Instead, for many, it’s a choice. Take Yulia Yurina: The Russian-born musician first came to Ukraine as a 18-year-old student in 2012 and soon joined forces with Ukrainian-born Stas Koroliov to form critically acclaimed pop-folk duo Yuko. Today, Yurina—still formally a Russian citizen despite publicly renouncing her citizenship and applying for a Ukrainian passport—is not only a beloved performer, whose recent album encapsulates much of the anger and grief felt by the average Ukrainian, but also a volunteer working tirelessly to provide the Ukrainian Armed Forces with weapons and equipment. “I dance through the bullets as air raid sirens sing to me,” Yurina sings on one of the album’s tracks. “I am disgusted by what you’ve done here, you’re killing souls but you won’t be able to kill our dreams. We are not your friends, your family, or your lovers.”

During the first months of the war, a new subgenre of locally produced music arose. “Bayraktar-core” (the semi-ironic name came from how often these songs mentioned the Turkish drones used to great effect by Ukrainian forces in the early stages of the war) songs were simple, composed over a mere few weeks, catchy, and characterized by their aggressive optimism, constant references to recent events, local politicians, wartime memes, and foreign allies (Boris Johnson, then British prime minister, was mentioned often).

What these songs lacked in lyrical nuance and musical innovation they more than made up for by giving millions of Ukrainians a sense of unity and community amid the chaos and horror. “Occupiers came to Ukraine, wearing new uniforms and driving military vehicles,” go the lyrics of one of the most popular “Bayraktar-core” songs. “But their equipment was soon ruined by the Bayraktar!” Some, such as a viral mashup sampling a folk tune and a phrase spoken by Johnson, made the leap over to English-language social media.

While simple war-themed entertainment (or even anything vaguely patriotic and uplifting) might have been enough for listeners and viewers in the early months of the war, the artistic questions got sharper as the fight went on.

Did performers who left the country soon after the full-scale invasion have a right to make money off of songs mentioning the horrors others faced while staying in Ukraine? Could writers who hadn’t personally experienced life under Russian occupation use the devastation in say, Bucha or Mariupol, in their stories? And what if they conducted interviews with the people who had? Many of these questions lack definite answers, but the public response to various works inspired by the war have been noticeably different.

When writer Daria Gnatko announced in late 2022 that she would be publishing a novel set in Russian-occupied Bucha, many pointed out that not enough time had passed to properly process the events that had transpired in the town, and wondered whether writing a story like this without conducting in-depth interviews with the survivors of the occupation was a form of exploitation. The book, along with another upcoming work by Gnatko, a novel inspired by the destruction and occupation of Mariupol, was postponed indefinitely by the publisher after a wave of public criticism.

Likewise, popular writer Kateryna Babkina’s latest novel Mom, Do You Remember? was met with controversy after the author, who had spent much of the war abroad, announced that the plot would be inspired by the occupation of Bucha. Some reviewers were concerned that not enough time had passed since the liberation of Kyiv Oblast and that the subject was still too triggering for most readers, while others darkly suspected Babkina had only mentioned the tragically famous town when announcing the book to draw more attention to her work.

However, most of this criticism was limited to social media, while the reviews in local publications were much more enthusiastic about the novel—which is told from the perspective of a teenage girl narrowly escaping from Russian occupation with her infant half-sister and trying to build a life for them both abroad—and described it as a touching and delicate work full of compassion.

“If for some Ukrainians the book is therapeutic, for foreigners, in particular for Poles, who can already read Babkina’s story, it gives a more internal context about what war victims experience—who walk the same streets and visit the same shops as they do—actually go through. What challenges and problems they face, what they feel, why some do not learn the language and choose to return home despite the missile attacks, and what is happening in the hearts of millions of children who were forced to grow up one day when their world was destroyed by Russia,” wrote a reviewer for the Polish-Ukrainian outlet Sestry.

The truth is that when it comes to describing experiences as traumatic as an ongoing war, there isn’t going to be a one-size-fits-all perspective or approach. Some readers find works written about or vaguely inspired by something they or their loved ones went through therapeutic, while others find them triggering or even offensive.

When it comes to film, meanwhile, the pre-2022 offerings were earnest but often unwatched. Reviewers treated these movies as important pieces of cinema, but ones that described horrors most Ukrainians preferred not to dwell on for too long. After the full-scale invasion, however, a dark realization dawned: The wartime dramas were now reflections of our own collective experience, and no romantic comedy or workplace drama was going to stop you from thinking about shrapnel and blood.

That was supplemented by the belief that Ukrainians had to bear witness. At a time when many civilians felt abandoned by human rights organizations’ failure to document Russian war crimes (Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy personally called out the International Red Cross over its inaction after the destruction of the Nova Kakhovka dam, while Amnesty International found itself in hot water after publishing a much-criticized report accusing Ukraine of endangering its own civilians), filmmakers took this challenge upon themselves. Documentaries shot during the siege of Mariupol, after the liberation of Bucha, and during the near-constant shelling of Kharkiv became a powerful tool for cultural diplomacy, encouraging non-Ukrainians to support Ukraine, and an instrument to counter Russian propaganda and war fatigue in the West. Perhaps the best-known example is the Oscar-nominated documentary film 20 Days in Mariupol, which garnered universally positive reviews at home and abroad and offered viewers a unique glimpse into the horrors faced by the residents and defenders of the besieged city.

One unexpected wartime challenge is creating entertainment aimed at children. How do you keep kids of vastly different ages entertained while sitting in cold, poorly-lit bomb shelters for hours on end? How do you teach them the rules of wartime safety in an accessible and easy-to-remember format? How do you help them process the heartbreak of losing loved ones, having parents on the frontlines, or living in constant fear of missiles and drones? And perhaps most importantly, how do you begin to broach the topic that there are people who want these kids and their entire families dead? This is when Patron—a real-life sapper dog who became an unexpected celebrity among both kids and adults alike—came in handy.

The wildly popular Jack Russell Terrier, who works as a detection dog and mascot for the State Emergency Service of Ukraine first caught the public’s eye in early 2022, when the dog was awarded a medal for locating and helping defuse unexploded mines left behind by Russian forces after they were driven out of Chernihiv. A video of the bulletproof vest-wearing puppy went viral, and the newly famous dog was soon making charity appearances, visiting kids harmed by the war in hospitals across the country, and even got his own animated web show and book series. Content starring Patron is produced in partnership with UNICEF and aims to teach Ukrainian kids the importance of staying away from abandoned landmines, avoiding suspicious objects left behind by the invading army, and staying brave under difficult circumstances.

Undoubtedly, the full-scale invasion of Ukraine has led to a heightened interest toward local art both among Ukrainians and foreigners, as well as provided an entire generation of artists with stories of sacrifice, courage, and defiance—stories that, despite their complexity, simply must be told, and that may well become modern classics at an international scale. When Penguin Press bought the rights to Ukrainian writer and soldier Oleksandr Mykhed’s autobiographical novel The Language of War, publishing director Casiana Ionita described the book as “a war book that will be read 10, 20, 50 years from now.” But it’s unclear if enough foreign publishers are ready to break their long-standing tradition of viewing events in Ukraine solely through the eyes of their Moscow-educated authors and allow Ukrainians on the frontlines to speak for themselves, like Mykhed, before the war claims them too.

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hoursofreading · 1 year

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Good-enough parenting requires a reciprocal refusal to be consumed by your children, to avoid succumbing either to the urge to make the other unreal, or the temptation of allowing them to make you so. For a child to recognize their parent’s independent existence might be just as hard as it is for a parent to recognize their children’s. Perhaps it is harder. There’s a whole genre of children’s book in which a baby animal of some kind seeks to locate or identify their mother. It’s an appealing primal quest. But there are hardly any books depicting a child seeking to get to know one’s mother.

A few years ago, while living abroad, I visited home fleetingly for a job interview. I’d hoped, perhaps assumed, my mum would meet me at the airport. Instead, she was away white-water kayaking for the weekend. She was pushing seventy at the time, and it was the dead of winter—I was impressed. But there was another feeling mixed in that was harder to place. Was I in some way put out that she should lead an independent life, even when I was gone? Some part of me still expected my parents’ activities to be defined by my own presence, waiting in suspended animation during my absences for my return. One of the reasons it is so hard to make sense of the identity of parent—mother perhaps in particular—is that its primary relatum isn’t (yet?) capable of understanding the limits or contingency of that identity. I am approaching forty now, and have a decent store of childhood memories of my parents at that age. It requires a pretty radical revision of those memories to allow that the adults in them had interior lives as real as my own now is. It’s like the opposite of finding yourself on a film set—buildings I treated as facades turn out to have interiors.

Through a thousand daily frustrations my children and I tell each other that our wills are separate. A refusal to be edible, the inducement of indigestion, is their best gift to me. In turn, I show them their own limits, my own reality. The business of being distinct people brings with it its own forms of loneliness. But it’s a loneliness that’s a precondition for the possibility of recognition—a loneliness that can drive us forward in the constantly shifting project of knowing and being known.

#quote

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accio-victuuri · 27 days

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from this article with WoF’s screenwriter Weng Liangping! this person contributed alot to make the drama what it is, especially the plot and it’s nice to know that WoF is his debut work! <3

i’ve added some excerpts from this interview about him + of course more on mentions of Wang Yibo & Ruolai.

Weng Liangping, who majored in drama, film and television literature at university, entered the TV drama production center of Jiangxi Radio and Television Station after graduation and worked as a planner and editor for ten years. He has served as the script coordinator for many popular film and television dramas such as "Azalea" and "Feng Yun 1911".

Speaking of his first screenwriting work, Weng Liangping smiled and said: "Because of the artist's reasons, this drama has not been broadcast yet."

In 2018, Weng Liangping resigned from his job in the system and became a full-time screenwriter. "War of Faith" is the first script he wrote independently.

The inspiration for the script came from his work at a television station. When he was looking through materials on the history of the revolution, he accidentally discovered the history of the Soviet State Bank. "Most of the previous dramas that wrote about the history of Jiangxi's revolution (screenwriters) wrote about front-line battles and the story of the barrel of a gun. The money bag, that is, the logistics support such as money and food, was rarely touched upon. "Weng Liangping immediately felt that this was a story worth exploring, but considering the setting of the plot and the shaping of the character's growth, he finally targeted the protagonist at a fledgling young man in the central bank established by the Kuomintang.

Then there are the joining of several young actors. When it comes to starring Wang Yibo, Li Qin, Wang Yang and other actors, Weng Liangping was full of praise. "Wei Ruolai was portrayed very well, like the drunken scene when he was out of the circle, and the scene where he was tortured by Captain Lin in prison. Also when Wei Ruolai's brother passed away, the actor performed the panic and sad feeling. I myself It made me cry.”

The actors' outstanding performances made the characters in Weng Liangping's script come alive.

There is a lot of discussion about the character online. The audience called Shen Tunan a financial tycoon, and gave Wei Ruolai an affectionate nickname: Financial Milk Crocodile.

There were also many enthusiastic viewers who analyzed the historical archetypes of Wei Ruolai and Shen Tunan. Weng Liangping also responded positively to this matter, "Actually, these characters have no fixed prototypes." Talking about the character Wei Ruolai, "He is a little man in the background of the times, smart and stubborn. When facing his master Shen Tunan , and he is very sincere. But behind the sincerity, he has his own opinions and plans for many things."

In addition, the constant output of golden sentences in the play also prompted "War of Faith" to continue to break out of the circle. A set of golden sentences produced by Wei Ruolai in his speech to recover the custody rights of tariffs were also one of the most impressive scenes when Weng Liangping wrote the script. "When I first wrote it, I was thinking about why Wei Ruolai could persuade others. In fact, the people present gathered together for nothing more than profit. And the manifestation of profit was to seize the market. Then I checked various population data at that time , economic data, and with the continuous support of the director team, this speech will be gradually improved."

In the final TV series, Wei Ruolai stood on the stage and gave a passionate unscripted speech, which not only aroused the resonance of the 124 members in the audience, but also burned into the hearts of the audience.

interview source.

#wang yibo #wei ruolai #war of faith #war of faith spoilers #accio victuuri translation

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gentlebeardsbarngrill · 1 month

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For Matthew

One of our dear crewmates, Stephanie, lost her son back in 2022. They both watched S1 together, and tragically he passed away not long after. Stephanie has been an active member of our crew for years now, and she reached out to Rhys and he made a lovely Cameo for her.

Some of you may have already seen it as she's been kind enough to share it with us previously, but after talking with Stephanie and hearing about who Matthew was, I wanted to put together a small dedication to him, and share Stephanie's words with you with her permission.

-- Dedication --

Matthew was 39 years old when he passed away, one of the original OFMD crewmates. He was a quirky, deaf, funny, and talented man who gave the world kindness despite the struggles he went through. He loved theatre, movies, video games, local art, and independent restaurants, and made a positive impact on everyone he met.

Matthew made his debut as a professional backyard wrestler in 2002 in the Phoenix New Times, and he worked on many well known video games in the industry doing development and quality assurance. He was truly a child a learning, and a true pilar of support in the community, and spent a great deal of time laughing and bringing light and joy to the world.

With his last wish, he donated his body to science, continuing on his loving and supportive legacy. Matthew was a wonderful man that was lost far too soon and his mother Stephanie, as well as anyone who knew him miss him so very much. Below is his obituary if you'd like to learn more about this wonderful crewmate of ours.

We salute you Matthew. You are the embodiment of all the kindness, acceptance, support, and loving things that embody Our Flag Means Death as well, and we're honored to have you amongst us in spirit. You are greatly missed, but never forgotten.

--- Stephanie ---

"...I wanted to share something with the fandom about my journey with OFMD and wondered if any of you have experienced some personal growth right along with Ed and Stede (and of course many others in the crew).

My 39-year old son told me there was a show we had to watch that just dropped. He says "you'll love it because Taika's in it and we love pirates.” I laughed and said, “I’m in.”

I had no idea what it was about, but he and I had watched Black Sails together and he’s right—we love pirates. Within minutes of the pilot, I was completely won over and enjoying every moment of piracy on the Revenge. “What we’re about to do will be perilous . . . . “. From that moment on, I was in deep. We binged the first 3 episodes, rewinding to replay scenes and went mental when we realized that we had to wait a full week for 2 more episodes. My son and I would text about it non-stop and we both started quoting lines and getting even more invested. He was sending me meme's and screenshots and we started living our best pirate life.

By the end of the season, we had laughed, cried, and thoroughly discussed every aspect of Ed and Stede's growing relationship. We felt the pain of the cliffhanger and became “mentally devastated by what [we’ve] witnessed” and we certainly didn’t bottle it up.

We talked non-stop about the show. It became a daily thing. Articles, interviews, pictures and joining in the quest for renewal. Once it got renewed (PRIDE month), we were on the lookout for any posts or information about signs of filming, etc. We couldn't wait for the second season and were counting down the months after we knew filming wrapped.

Then the unthinkable happened. My son went into the hospital after having a slow recovery to multiple surgeries. Cliff Notes version: He was admitted and within 24 hours, he was in ICU on life support. My son had an extensive medical history beginning when he was an infant. 42+ surgeries and many air-evacs to Children’s Hospital so it was kind of the norm to go in and be out within a few days or week and be on the road to recovery again.

If you met him, you wouldn’t even know he had all the medical issues he had because he worked full time and carried himself like a stand-up comedian--always laughing and telling stories. He was a video gamer who had worked in the industry for 7 years until he had to take a leave to handle his medical issues and have a job that didn’t exceed 40 hours.. He was really a character and had a lot of funny mannerisms.

This time was different. He didn’t rally and 10 days later he tragically died from a fungal infection that they couldn’t identify until it was too late to treat.

He died in June, 2022, and the grief has been unrelenting and unbearable. I have literally shut down and spent the months grieving and in so much pain that I can barely leave the house and see anyone. It has broken me. When I saw the actual date that S2 would drop, my emotions were so intense because I didn't know how I could possibly watch it without him. I finally went on and rewatched Season 1 to prepare for Season 2 and found myself crying through the entire 10 episodes every time I thought of his witty banter during the season.

I wasn’t sure I could handle Season 2 without him. I talked about it a lot in Grief therapy and decided I would watch it with him and for him. I would try the first episode and see if I could do it. I would imagine all the conversations we would have had.

Matthew understood being different. He was Deaf and spent so much time in and out of hospitals and was bullied and teased his whole childhood. Even with all of that, he grew up to be loving, kind, accepting of all, and a VERY FUNNY guy.

On the day I started S2, I remembered that Matthew enjoyed being on the groups on Reddit for OFMD. Having never done Reddit, I was nervous, but decided I would see if the online community would be something that would give me the thing I missed so much . . . his commentary.

I couldn't believe how it opened my world up. Everyone was so nice and open to discussion about OFMD. The banter, information and excitement has been so restorative for me. It has given me a lot of healing to say the least.

I binged the first 3 episodes for S2 and went through it with all of you watching Blackbeard fall into the worst version of the Kraken that he had been and felt every emotion during the s2e3 Merman scene. Laughing and crying, laughing and crying, I waited for each week craving their reunion would finally happen and celebrated on-line with the entire fandom as we shared our analysis and thoughts.

Having a show that means so much to me has truly made me so happy. I loved that Ed and Stede are a middle aged couple and that they both had to grow so much to get to the point where they could be together in life as a beautiful and loving couple. I appreciated the writing so much because DJ and crew did really give us what he said he would, but in a far better way than I could have ever imagined.

I still need a s3 because I want to see Ed and Stede mature even more as a couple--no more leaving each other! I also want to see them meet up with their found family.

I want to see the new Revenge adventures, Spanish Jackie and Swede, Izzy legacy moments, Zheng, Oluwande, Wee John, Jim, Archie, Fang, Frenchie, Black Pete, Lucius, Buttons the sea gull, the perfect music and emotional parallels to past episodes and, of course, revenge for Minor Prince Ricky, Is that asking too much? I'm sure I left out so much else I want to see, but you all get it because you are stuck in this vortex right along side of me.

I dream of HBO/Max renewing this sooner rather than later so I can start thinking of when they will be filming and following all the hints that unfold. This show means so much to me and I am grateful that it exists.

I feel like I can be a better version of an ally to the community I love so much by immersing myself within all the representation in this treasure trove of storytelling. I learn so much by seeing these relationships develop into deep and committed love and have such respect for all of us who just want to see these relationships normalized everywhere in society. We all benefit from inclusion and I am very very grateful for this show. It means more to me than I could ever explain.

I'm sorry I rambled, but I am just so appreciative of all the people in this group who just share and talk and roll around in all our in-depth chatter.

I celebrate this series and everyone that worked so hard to provide this beautiful story. I feel my son's presence every moment I watch it (on repeat) and discuss it every single day.

Izzy's (Con's) death scene touched me deeply . . . thinking about losing my son and how that felt and how I held onto him for as long as I could so I wouldn’t forget how it felt to hold him. Taika's commitment to the pain of losing Izzy felt like it paralleled all my feelings since the loss. Izzy's deathbed voice and words have lived in my heart ever since.

Con and Taika were top tier and seeing all the crew's emotions as they watched what was happening felt so raw and touching. I also felt so much from s2e3 when Ed is dead and Stede is begging him to live . . . I lived that as well, convinced that my son would somehow prove them all wrong and open his eyes. I said it over and over and when Ed opened his eyes, I just felt every single emotional hurdle.

Yes, I was a bucket of tears through it all, but I also felt a lot of healing. I’d love to hear from any of you who have had some kind of evolution or growth from this gift of a show."

----

You can reach out to Stephanie here on twitter if you'd like to discuss some of your experiences as well. SRC: Stephanie's words per her permission. If someone doesn't have access to tumblr, they can read about Matthew on the Repo:

Cameo: Rhys Darby - For Matthew

#ofmd #ofmd crew #cw: death #our flag means death #our flag means us #cameo #rhys darby #dedication

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