#the shadow minion

[vamplire]

having an ancient vampire develop a psychosexual obsession for me after repressing any feelings of love for centuries would fix me i think

#vamplire.txt #interview with the vampire #vampire #vampires #vampiric #wwdits #what we do in the shadows #carmilla #devil's minion #vampyre #astarion

[rabbitprincessthief]

gog i still can't get over minish cap vaati's Everything. He is So Fucking Stupid (affectionate)

Like. This guy's establishing character moment is, in order:

he's introduced as having won an entire tournament to get to touch a magic chest and get a cool sword, which was the prize for said tournament

turns around and does a goddamn evil soliloquy TEN FEET AWAY FROM THE GUARDS who were about to hand him his macguffin on a platter

(like this man fucks up his own horribly planned daylight heist because he cannot keep a lid on the dramatics for FIVE FUCKING MINUTES, IN PUBLIC)

(THE BAR WAS ON THE FLOOR VAATI, FUCKING GANONDORF PLAYS THE PIPE ORGAN FOR HIS OWN BOSS INTRO AND HE STILL KNOWS BETTER THAN THIS SHIT)

proceeds to fight the guards (it is, admittedly, a curbstomp for him, but it still clearly wasn't his plan, because otherwise why bother with the tournament)

gloats evilly

opens chest, unleashing a whole bunch of monsters

exposits out loud about Zelda's powers like a nerd while she is actively charging up her magic powers to kick his ass

RECOGNIZES and IDENTIFIES said magic as the special power carried by the female royal line

completely fails to recognize it as the light force he is currently trying to get his hands on (he spends like 99% of the game not figuring this out.)

petrifies her

(i have no idea if link could have deflected this spell if he had managed to get the right angle with his shield but i like to think somewhere there is a very short and very funny alternate timeline where it happens)

(more importantly: no part of vaati's original presumed plan would have involved doing this. he 100% created this situation for himself by being an dramatic idiot and picking a fight for no good reason.)

looks in the chest

there's no light force

considering his stated goals he might be as confused as you are about the monsters tbh

uhhh

evil laugh

teleports the fuck out

He then proceeds to spend the rest of the game trying to figure out where the light force is and ends up having to wait for Ezlo and Link to figure it out first because he was, as far as I can tell, GENUINELY stuck on this part. He fucking kidnaps and impersonates the King, not for access to Zelda, but to… send guards to go look for the Light Force, presumably because he was either running out of ideas or genuinely thought that would work.

None of the guards even had any idea what he was talking about. He's not even good at impersonating the King. He's already sent like twenty people to the dungeon by the time you get there and it hasn't even been a week. Somehow the game spins this as a cunning plan and clever manipulation or something.

(Meanwhile the guards are just. Poking around in random bushes and shit hoping to find the light force. One of them asks you what you think it might look like.)

Zelda is literally right next to the throne and Vaati does not figure it out until you find an actual honest-to-goodness LORE TABLET spelling out that the Light Force is Stored in the Zelda, at which point he's like "ahahaha you've done my work for me this was definitely my plan all along" and takes over the castle and throws a bunch of monsters at you to stall for time while he figures out how to extract the force from her. Somehow he still doesn't think to actually lock the fucking door.

#vaati #minish cap #loz #mc #he's my stupid little squeak squeak and i love him #meta #op #sorry this got long but i have So Many Words about this little bastard #i think he's a really fun foil to ganondorf tbh - #ganondorf looks like a brute force guy but in practice tends largely toward manipulating and long cons and cunning #the appearance of dumb muscle but is actually refined and clever and skilled while also still being built like a brick wall #vaati looks like a classic scheming squishy wizard guy but actually is just cheating and does almost all his nonsense very directly #and his plans tend to be either Do X / ??? / Profit stuff or barely exist at all #to the point where og four swords is gated primarily by your ability to convince great fairies to help you rather than vaati stopping you #ganondorf is a guy given power who wants a magic wish granting artefact #vaati is a guy given a magic wish-granting artefact who decides he wants more power now actually #vaati has had a significant minion approximately once (shadow link) and that was in shared custody with ganon

[cbrownjc]

I’ve been thinking about this book that amc-Daniel wrote about the growing AIDS crisis. The back blurb says it was first published as a running series on Kaposi Sarcoma during the very beginning of the AIDS epidemic, which was before it was even called AIDS. Which means Daniel would have been in his late-20s at the time when writing about it (circa 1981). 

This means that Daniel was writing a running series for some newspaper (or maybe multiple papers) about this illness that seemed to be infecting only gay men (which is what was thought about the disease at the time - the original name for AIDS was GRID: “gay-related immune deficiency.”) Given how Daniel frequented gay bars, plus lived in both San Fransisco and New York, he might have even known a person or two who contracted it.  

If Devil’s Minion did happen in the past (and the hints even from the showrunners and cast is that it did), and it happened for the same length of time that it did in the books, then that also means Daniel was still writing, and was specifically writing a lot about this topic, even when he was entangled with Armand (and possibly Louis as well too in the show’s version of it). 

#Daniel Molloy #Daniel Malloy #Armand #Devil's Minion #Interview with the Vampire #armandaniel #amc iwtv #iwtv #fictional book #show lore #The Devil's Minion #armand x daniel #daniel x armand #A Shadow on the Skin #AIDS History #AIDS

[outoftoucherlocksholmes]

it occurred to me while backing up procreate files last night that aside from Bad Bisexual Representation Booty Shorts Dio, i never posted any of the things from this canvas i had going for sketches while watching part 3 back in 2022, which is a shame, really

#jojo's bizarre adventure #stardust crusaders #jotaro kujo #joseph joestar #kakyoin noriyaki #jean pierre polnareff #muhammad avdol #dio brando #hol horse #n'doul #oingo and boingo #terence t d'arby #alessi jjba #with a special shoutout to lisa lisa kars and shadow the hedgehog #context for the oingo boingo alessi one: i was like ''damn it must suck being an eight year old with severe anxiety in the same cult mansio #as Loser Dude Who Beats Up Children For Fun'' and then thought of that image #context for the terence darby one is that he levitates sometimes and that shits creepy in a hilarious way #also ''commits vehicular manslaughter nonbinarily'' is also just something i said on discord (about yoda actually) #but for some reason kakyoin would often end up being the one driving. and i think he should be allowed to run over some of dio's minions #i think everything else here speaks for itself #OH also the enya and polnareff ''can't stand his fake ass/me and the bestie'' was drawn on this canvas too but on hidden layers #jojo no kimyou na bouken #jojo part 3

[fantarain]

evil x just wasted military money

#evil xisuma #jeff the minion #hermitcraft #audio from the shadow the hedgehog fandub

[wcfseltzerwater]

Laugh! Laugh at the happy little clown! Go on! That's what he's here for, folks!!

#doodle #oc art #circus #clown #villain #mad scientist #chancemaster #ringmaster #shadow #sad little dude oh no #chancemaster has to hunch over a lot #all his minions are shorter than he is

[serpentarius]

My AO3 Masterlist

Here's my masterlist of works on AO3!

What We Do In The Shadows (TV & Film)

You're A Little Bit Just Like Me (Viago x Anton) - multichapter romcom fic, Rated M [soon to be E, most likely]

All Marked Up (and Nowhere to Hide) (Viago x Anton) - oneshot hickey fic, rated M

Nandor's Freddie (Nandor x Freddie / Nandor x Guillermo) - oneshot Nandor musings, Rated E

Interview With The Vampire (TV)

time is a mouth as bloody as any other (Daniel x Armand) - oneshot post-S1 Old Maniel and Armand get it on, Rated E, Part 1 of the old man & the vampire series

as long as I find you interesting (I won't kill you) (Daniel x Armand) - multichapter Devil's Minion era, Rated E, Part 2 of the old man & the vampire series

Our Flag Means Death

Time & Tide (Stede Bonnet x Edward Teach) - season 2 fic, Rated M

Good Omens

Reverie (Crowley x Aziraphale) - post-season 2 fic, oneshot, fluff

Star Wars (Animated TV Series & Films)

The Heat We Make in Ice (Alexsandr Kallus x Zeb Orrelios) - multichapter Kalluzeb PWP (with some plot), Rated E

A Series of Stormpilot Vignettes (Poe Dameron x Finn) - multichapter stormpilot moments, Rated E

American Gods (TV)

The Morning After (Laura Moon x Mad Sweeney) - oneshot PWP, rated E

Teen Wolf (TV)

Runaway (Stiles x Derek Hale) - oneshot romance, rated E

Fluorescent Adolescent (Stiles x Derek Hale) - oneshot romance, rated M

Shadowhunters (TV)

A 40 Minute Episode of Magnus and Alec's First Date (Magnus Bane x Alec Lightwood) - oneshot romance, rated M

#masterlist #fic masterlist #my fics #ao3 #what we do in the shadows #viago x anton #vianton #nandor x guillermo #nandermo #nandor x freddie #interview with the vampire #iwtv #armand x daniel #armandaniel #devil's minion #our flag means death #ofmd #stede x ed #blackbonnet #gentlebeard #star wars rebels #kalluzeb #stormpilot #american gods #laura moon #mad sweeney #teen wolf #derek x stiles #shadowhunters #magnus x alec

[venussaidso]

They have an excuse to be lazy and not make use of her assassin skill set again, I just realized. Once the memories come back, she may be written as never wanting to have a part in that life ever again. Therefore she may never kill Jin mu, Jang Uk may do it in her place. I feel this way because I just realized that the Hong sisters don't actually give a shit about their female characters to a noticeable extent in comparison to their male characters.

STOP GIVING US COMPLEX FEMALE CHARACTERS IF YOU'RE NOT GONNA SOLIDIFY THEIR ARC, ESPECIALLY IF YOU'RE JUST GONNA FRIDGE THEM.

Hope they make use of the trope of the student (Naksu) surpassing and thereby killing their villainous Master (Jinmu), especially if they're gonna do typical tropes this season. At least do that. The worst they could do, at this rate after prolonging her powerlessness since S1, is make the almighty powerful Jang Uk take HER kill for her. But then again sexism lmao.

#alchemy of souls light and shadow #alchemy of souls #that would be the ultimate middle finger #like they're many sides to naksu but her shadow assassin side hasn't been expanded on #the side that is dark and cruel #and she'll have to have the courage to face all of it when she remembers #and not just face and accept it but also FINISH her unfinished business #for her father and for HERSELF she has to kill Jin mu and ALL HIS MINIONS #MAKE HER GO WILD

[nightcolorz]

Does anyone else think that maybe Guillermo and Nandor’s relationship from wwdits was based off of Armand and Daniel’s in Queen of the Damned? It’s not that outlandish that wwdits would take inspiration from other vampire media, that’s almost the entire premise of the show-to parody the vampire genre. And Guillermo is canonically a vampire chronicles fan. And to be honest I think that both wwdits and tvc just happening to both have the dynamic of “the human who desperately wants to be a vampire and begs the vampire to turn him” and “the vampire who longs for humanity and refuses to turn the human because of that” is one hell of a coincidence

#the vampire chronicles #interview with the vampire #the devils minion #the vampire armand #armand #daniel molloy #daniel/armand #Queen of the damned #wwdits #what we do in the shadows #guillermo de la cruz #wwdits guillermo #nandor the relentless #nandormo #guillermo x nandor

[catsafari25]

One thing the bionicle novels/comics are good for are filling in the gaps the movies left (how the toa metru found the great disks, how they created ships to ferry the matoran to mata nui) but then you get the books that stick rigidly to the movies' plots and suddenly it's like "oh yeah, vakama went from being malcontent to actively betraying his friends in the span of a literal day (and his friends located a mythical rahi in that same period)" when I always assumed there was more of a time skip in the movie, and I would have loved to see those two plotlines progress in parallel

#bionicle #look im just a sucker for a) plotlines where someone loses themselves to The Beast Within #and b) betrayal #so web of shadows was a formative movie of my youth #maybe there is more of a time skip #but the book is literally like “oh there's a big day tomorrow (when you destroy the toa)” #and it's explained how the rest of the toa hordika basically get swept away to their destination #anyway in my heart it takes a good while and vakama doesn't just speedrun his heelturn #look. the fun of a betrayal plot is the character basically giving in to despair and thinking they only have the one option #also what i will never forgive about the book: roodaka doesnt actually send her minions #plummeting to their deaths but actually has a safety net in place #that's too kind of her #i mwan. it makes sense. but not for her

[thexgrayxlady]

I don't care what the original plans were for Shadow's origins. She is exponentially funnier as Chase's magical oops baby.

#shadow young #chase young #xiaolin showdown #like literally tries to make a minion #but fucks up and makes a baby

[vamplire]

oh to be a centuries old vampire numb to any feelings of love & affection until u meet some silly mortal who breaks down any barriers you've put up & slowly works their way into ur cold unfeeling heart, making u feel alive for the first time in ages.

#vamplire.txt #interview with the vampire #carmilla #dracula #vampire #vampires #what we do in the shadows #wwdits #loustat #nandermo #devil's minion #armand #lestat de lioncourt

[theorderofthetriad]

So i made This Post about shipping Gary Fisher (also known as Henchman 21) from Venture Bros and Guillermo de la Cruz from What We Do In The Shadows, and then @strawberryoverlord commented this:

which i very much had also been thinking about! specifically what'd happen when Guillermo discovers the gigantic "HENCH 4 LIFE" tattoo across Gary's belly.

#but also possibly consider: Gary thinks Guillermo is a henchman and Guillermo thinks Gary is a Minion #lotta comedic possibility for misunderstandings there #Guillermo talks about finding virgins are Gary is like 'wtf'? and Gary talks about guild law and Guillermo is like 'thats not a rule?' #venture bros #the venture bros #gary fisher #henchman 21 #guillermo de la cruz #what we do in the shadows #wwdits #my art #santagno #Top Tino Post

[shadowphoenixrider]

I am *trying* to romance Karlach in Baldur's Gate 3, but Gale is Right There being a sweet guy with Sad Wet Beast vibes, and my need to adopt him is overwhelming.

#spr rambles #my types are big strong woman who could throw me like a javelin #and also a sweet nerdy man who may or may not be able to call down the wrath of the gods if he's pissed #they're both in my party #can you imagine the hell i am facing #gale standing in the corner like: 'please can i have a magic sock to eat it hurts so 🥺' #and i'm like: 'your honour i can't not fuck him' #NO I WILL RESIST #i'll roll him a paladin #'but shadow you aren't even out of act 1-' SILENCE MINION

[sweetest-honeybee]

Make Jeff the minion a word shadow skeleton I said

It’ll be fun I said

#(narrator voice) It was not in fact fun for Bee to draw Jeff the minion as a weird shadow skeleton #my art #wip #art wip #like it looks cool but UGH #had to use references for this one lmao

[fantarain]

Evil Xisuma and Jeff The Minion in a Nutshell

#hermitcraft #evil xisuma #jeff the minion #animatic #fanart #my art #ayyyy it’s been awhile since I’ve made an animatic #audio from the shadow the hedgehog fandub #again