#the vent trials

[milkibana]

there's rats in the vents again

comms open

#milk skribs #supposedly daily barnes doodle #they aren't even traversing #hl #gordon freeman #barney calhoun #eli vance #the vent trials

[sketchygainedyoursoul]

I've already said smth abt this (and seen a post abt it) but it was in tags of the afformentioned post and was reblogged when i was shadowbanned so;

Imagine you are an immortal being, a god, if you will, capable of shape shifting into any form you desire. Male, woman, dog, whatever-- if you want to be it, you are.

And then you wake up in a dumpster, you find every single shred of immortality stripped from you because of something your great-great grandchild did and the body you wake up in is not even your own.

Cue: Apollo.

The man is constantly depicted as a beautiful man, muscled and long blonde hair with perfect skin. And then he wakes up in a 16 year old's body, short and curly hair, unfamiliar body mass, and acne. Vanity aside-- that's going to feel terrible. He would have to have felt every single flaw with himself, a body he never chose. He would have to adjust the way he walks, the way he fights, runs, and jumps. He can't count on his flexibility to save him anymore, not even from dysphoria.

He probably had issues with the skin and the acne, and the feeling of being imperfect. With the gross bodily functions and the unfamiliar needs of his flesh prison.

And that's without adding in gender. Apollo is male, yes, but to what extent? Maybe he's only male sometimes. Maybe he wants to be, maybe he is a woman sometimes. And he could change his body accordingly. He could ignore human form and become a glimmering mass of divine light. And now all of that, all of him, is compressed into a 16 year old boy's body, unchanging in the ways that matter.

sorry i think abt this a lot

#lester papadopoulos #headcanons #gnc apollo is real and i will fight for this #trials of apollo #slight venting #rick riordan's apollo #pjo

[ladyblueberrymuffin]

I feel like people haven't really understood The Lost Hero, because like... "I think the reasons Piper and Jason broke up make sense. Their relationship is based on fake memories and blah blah blah"

THE LOST HERO IS LITERALLY ABOUT PIPER HAVING AN IDENTITY CRISIS, BECAUSE SHE LEARNS HER MEMORIES ARE FAKE AND SHE HAS TO LEARN TO ACCEPT IT.

The whole crux of Jasiper in The Lost Hero is they're slow and shy and even ashamed to a degree about their feelings, because they are afraid it'd be those fake memories pushing them into this.

Like, I feel like The Lost Hero couldn't be more obvious about the fact that they like each other for real, and they're the only ones who can't see it.

Piper already learned this lesson in The Lost Hero, why is this treated like a new development in The Burning Maze?

Also,

Aphrodite smiled. “Because you are my daughter, Piper. You see possibilities much more vividly than others. You see what could be. And it still might be—don’t give up."

It wasn't Hera, or Aphrodite who gave Piper the memories of dating Jason. It was Piper. Like, the way I think about it, it's like when you meet this boy, and you develop a crush, and you start making up all these fantasies about dating him in your head.

In other words, all Hera did was "introduce" Jason to Piper's brain, and because Jason is very sweet, and nice, and funny, Piper's brain was like "Yes, this guy, more please."

I dunno. I always found it cute. She's basically just dealing with an unrequited crush, just dressed up in a magic packaging.

I do think there should be more emphasis put on the fact that there are differences between how Piper "remembers" Jason, and what he's really like, and over the course of the book, she realizes that she likes real Jason more than her idealized version of him.

No one gaslit no one into liking each other. Jason and Piper actively gave each other time to process things. The Lost Hero even ends with this:

Across the green, her cabin mates looked disappointed that they hadn’t witnessed a kiss. They started cashing in their bets. But that was all right. Piper was patient.

The patient bit was always the most important to me. Piper isn't rushing things.

I think Rick heard fans complaining that Jasiper is based on fake memories and how messed up that is, and course corrected. They wanted a major character death, more representation, a different personality for Piper, not having Piper constantly think about Jason, they didn't really like Jason...

And you know, I think he's valid. Like, this is a job to him. He's feeding his family. He doesn't have to care about these fake names on the page just because I do. He wanted to accommodate the fans, he probably wanted some more meaty character stuff after the last couple of books were kinda boring with Callypso and Leo and so on, he probably thought this would get people hooked and interested.

It's fine. I'm glad he's still making books, and getting work, and helping other creators. I don't think other writers are that invested in their characters either, but when I read like a Kami Garcia schmaltzy romance, it feels like it was written with the mindset of "How would I feel if my friend stopped talking to me? How would I feel if my loved one died?" and it makes the actions of the characters feel less cold and detached.

I'd have a panic attack if I was friends with Leo and he moved on a whim, and didn't seem all that broken up about not seeing me again. I'd feel like I am not worth a lot to him. Hell, I am 23, way older than they are, and I still cry, because my friend moved away this year. I pass his house, and I realize I feel nothing, and I don't wanna be there, because he's not there, and I cry. These characters don't cry about anything, unless someone dies. And even then, a few minutes later, it's back to normal.

I dunno, is this what makes it more accessible to middle-schoolers? I feel like middle-schoolers would be even more terrified of the prospect of a friend moving away and not even feeling that sad over leaving them behind.

EDIT: Furthermore, if you think Hera put fake memories of a relationship into Piper's head... TO WHAT END?! To what end?! How does that benefit Hera in any way? Why would Hera care? Rick has done a pretty interesting thing with Hera lately by making her actually love Jason like a son, but that relationship was a lot more reserved at the time of HoO. Why would she care if he gets a girlfriend? Why would she think Piper is a good match for Jason? I feel like the last thing Hera would want for Jason is a relationship with Piper, like, common, Hera hates Aphrodite, they're like polar opposites, and the Trojan War started because of their argument (Athena was involved too, but Hera has different reasons to dislike her). Hera is the goddess of marriage, who has stayed loyal to a man who cheats on her daily, do you think she would hitch her boy with the daughter of the only woman who's body count rivals Zeus'?

#heroes of olympus #hoo #percy jackson #pjo #toa #trials of apollo #the burning maze #can you tell i recently stumbled into the burning maze and got swept up in the angy again? #i'm sorry i'll try to slow down with these vent posts #jasiper #jiper #jason grace #piper mclean #leo valdez #i don't hate rick riordan i swear

[batwynn]

Don’t speak of the other side till you’re there.

#loki #norse mythology #Norse myth Loki #vent art #stitched lips #trials of Loki #tw: blood #tw: body horror #don’t jinx it #something something #when you cut the thread from your lips #cut your hair #rebecome #and smile though it aches

[furies-inthe-mirror]

dont you tell me how i feel.

#my art #artists on tumblr #disco elysium #the skills disco elysium #composure disco elysium #I'm fine don't worry about it. this was less vent art and more me fucjing around in csp's trial version #if it looks poorly cropped that's because it is. did you know you cant save art in csp's trial? fucked up . -composure

[californiannostalgia]

sometimes I think

hey maybe it's that time again

it's that time to write an abuse survivor mental illness fic with lester papadopoulus and maybe that will help me figure out what the fuck is going on in my brain

maybe my obsession with normalcy and potential dangers and spiraling late at night and being suspicious of people and the hollow disgust at the desperately cheerful person I become around my (changed behavior) parents isn't normal people stuff

maybe I'm gonna be afraid forever incomprehensible forever non-normal forever and maybe apollo wants to say a few words on the subject

#lester papadopoulos #my thoughts #child abuse #I can't though because I suck at writing -> see I know this isn't strictly true but this is the first thought I go to #it is fucked up how I've internalized the concept of writing as a waste of time #feeling sort of insane hah when have I not felt insane #merry christmas and happy new year everybody somehow it's that time of year #I can't even figure out whether I want to keep going on this life trajectory bc most of the time I can't guage the misery level difference #is this academic student thing more difficult? less? what am I comparing this with? #is the fact that I was abused and so easier to take advantage of gonna be obvious to everyone I meet? how mentally ill do I seem to others? #vent post #trials of apollo

[lexch4n]

post game blues

#ace attorney #art #artwork #finishing “Trials and Tribulations” and “Ghost Trick” in a row left me empty #ghost trick #post game depression #vent

[entropy-sea-system]

ARFID and IBS (and other GI issues) culture is feeling like you're "wasting food" by not eating the exact same food that the people around you are, even when you're not throwing it away, and when it would literally harm you to eat it

#vent #arfid #ibs #also when a same food triggers you ibs grrrrr.. #palate says yes intestines say no #also like. so sick of not being able to know WHICH food was the culprit #so its either trial and error or avoid one of the foods and see #and maybe tmi low key trying to be a bit of a coprologist to find out WHAT food caused your GI symptoms by looking for food bits #gi issues

[venacoeurva]

What is with those random accounts like [insert a few random words here]-blog just popping up flooded with machine fabricated images. Are they the new spam bots, because if so they've finally found a spam bot more annoying than the p[]rn ones: silicon valley type machine learning bros...

#vena vents #not art #nice shitty generated image of a house and fake animals bro I hope your programmer trips face first onto legos covered in feral cat feces #like if you see a blog with that format and clearly obviously not a person just that format check their posts at least #I'm still mad about those silicon valley fuckheads making the association of ai so shitty and greedy and inherently parasitic #years ago it was associated with science and medicine and training trial and error behaviors with characters in programs #like teaching a little 3d model guy to walk and all that #now it just feels insidious and soulless for spineless little baby men who don't have the balls to try to be creative and inevitably fail #at it sometimes and for corporations who don't value humans

[milkibana]

But he's so young!

#milk skribs #supposedly daily barnes doodle #the vent trials #idk why i tried a new coloring style but i like it #barney calhoun #dr isaac kleiner #comic

[yourfavouriteprettyboy]

Ok why are the maze runner movies nothing like the books?? There's so much that happened in the books and not in the movies and vice versa....

#maze runner #dt's rants and vents #the death cure #the maze runner #the scorch trials #thomas #newt #minho #dylan O'Brien #Thomas Brodie sangster #james dashner #newtmas #tmr #dt reads tmr

[ramblngz-of-a-lunatic]

I'll set the whole world on fire to burn away the memories of you

#dark photography #pyromania #pyromancy #vent post #horror aesthetic #aesthetic #dark fantasy #witchcore #female rage #im just a girl #hell is a teenage girl #occult #inner thoughts #photographers on tumblr #teenage angst #angst #dark forest #witch trials #journal entry #journal enteries #tortured artist #living with cptsd

[meganechan05]

Morfonia was so ready to prosecute his ass 😂😂

#probably overheard Rita venting to Moffun and just waiting for the day they can put Racles on trial for his bs #all of the aides just straight up hating Racles is just so freaking funny to me #kingohger spoilers #kingohger #king ohger #ohsama sentai kingohger

[knackeredforever]

Guess who bought the steam version of rpg maker MV after trying the free trial version finally plays it and encounters several game breaking bugs by running autorun events causing the player to be unable to move after the event finishes even if I add a switch to stop the event and making the game unplayable thanks rpgmaker MV.

What the fuck.

#rpgmaker #rpg maker #rpgmaker mv #the trial version worked perfectly but the payed version doesn’t work properly what the fuck #I can’t find anyone else who has a similar problem to me why is this happening #anyone who uses rpgmaker MV on steam could you please help me try to understand what the fuck is wrong with my version of the game #I’ve already asked this on another forum I’m mainly posting this just to vent #game dev #gamedev

[iishmael]

ok im back to hating everything. My prof really did NOT do a good job this semester I feel completely unprepared and… I’m aware that what I’m trying to do is so much more complex than what we covered in class but normally I don’t have problems to scale things up like this but I think I severely underestimated the complexity of what I’m trying to model. Lol. god I’m so scared bc a huge part of my research hinges on me figuring this out and I have NO ONE I can ask bc no one works with QGIS on this scale so help me fucking g-d lmaoooo 😭

#I’ll be alright I’ll be ok #I’m just venting #I do know people who work with it but they’re acquaintances and it’ll be weird if I ask for help out of the blue #I WILL ask them but not for this assignment cos it’s due on Wednesday 😂 #it’s just a little trial run so I’m ok bc I think I have enough data for that #I’m just gonna do some raster analysis tmrrw bc I’m good at that #and then hopefully he won’t notice that I have no fucking clue how to interpret the spatial lag model lololol #I just don’t fucking understand what my output is tbh #like. 😭 too many variables and they’re so weirdly spatially distributed but I don’t understand where that comes from bc #they should be clustered bc I RECORDED them as clusters myself #is it bc the stupid model doesn’t understand that there’s 5 clusters? and it treats it like they are one giant cluster? #I don’t know! and neither does the fucking internet apparently! 😂 #UAGGHHHH ok time to go to bed #shut up Sam

[voiceactresskurutta]

me: hi i need a good referral to some sort of mental health specialist to get proper diagnoses for these specific potential issues. i've put this off for a long time because i have a hard time making decisions, struggle with communication/contacting professionals, and have a hard time trusting medical personnel without a good reference my pcp: here's a list of several dozen providers i printed out that include a lot of ones you don't quality for and don't specialize in what you asked about, it's just a massive print out of all our resources me: wow this is worthless to me

#this was several weeks ago and i have not worked up the courage to call any of them #personal #venting #i got a pcp awhile back because i desperately needed med refills #and the free clinic won't see me anymore since i got medicaid #the people in my city were all either not taking new patients or booked out for months #the lady i saw though had so many red flags i really don't want to see her again #but since it's medicaid every time i switch a pcp i need to call them and have it officially changed #and they have to send me a new card #it's such a hassle #it's so hard to go through the trial and error process of finding a good provider #genuinely had a terrible time talking to that woman and want to avoid her like the plague #i miss my old provider in my old state even though i never liked living in that state