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leadandblood · 2 months

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Okay, Here's one! It's the first time I've ever done a sreenshot type wallpaper, so I don't yet know what I'm doing 😅

#good thing they're in the arctic and the background is so solid #don't know how i'd do it if there were like. trees #oh and yeah - no AI was used - i did the whole extension thing #thought i'd say that #just AI-free content in this house #francis crozier #the terror #the terror amc #the terror wallpaper

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stil-lindigo · 11 days

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lead balloon (the tumblr post that saved me)

if this comic resonated with you, it would mean the world to me if you donated to this palestinian family's escape fund.

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no creative notes because this isn't that kind of comic.

I know I don’t owe any of you anything but I still felt compelled to write about my long term absence. And I feel far enough away from the dangerous spot I was in to be able to make this comic. I have a therapist now, and she agreed that making this could be a very cathartic gesture, and the start of properly leaving these thoughts behind me. I am still, at seemingly random times, blindsided by fleeting desires to kill myself. They’re always passing urges, but it’s disarming, and uncomfortable. I worry sometimes that my brain’s spent so long thinking only about suicide that it’s forgotten how to think about anything else. Like, now that I've opened that door for myself, I'll never be able to fully shut it again. But I’m trying my best to encourage my mind in other directions. We'll see how that goes.

I am still donating all proceeds from my store to Palestinian causes. So far, I've donated over $15K, not including donations coming from my own pocket or the fundraising streams which jointly raised around $10K. In the time since I made my initial post about where this money would be going, the focus has shifted from aid organisations to directly donating to escape funds.

If you'd like to do the same, you can look at Operation Olive Branch, which hosts hundreds of Palestinian escape funds or donate to Safebow, which has helped facilitate the safe crossing and securing of important medical procedures for over 150 at-risk palestinians since the beginning of the genocide.

#cw: suicidal ideation #cw: suicide #cw: self harm #cw: mental health #cw: depression #i made the balloon the main representation of my self destructive urges for a reason but im not going to explain it #i tried to keep a lot of the details in this vague #it would be my worst nightmare if this comic encouraged someone to hurt themselves #so. please dont #for a long time even the thought of making this comic felt so insipid and narcissistic #with the state of the world as it is #having the only threat to your life be yourself felt so privileged and trite and shameful #but doing this comic made me sit down and process things in full #and im just. very grateful i didn't give in to my thoughts back when i sincerely felt i'd be more useful to the world dead #i also feel the need to say that this wont represent everyone's battle with mental illness. its unfortunately different for all of us #there is no fix-all #and im afraid this might be one of those comics that either resonates a lot or misses the target by a mile #i made it for myself foremost. and now that its done im glad i did it #thank you for reading #and please stay alive #stillindigo art #stillindigo comics

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heritageposts · 4 months

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Secret South African documents reveal that Israel offered to sell nuclear warheads to the apartheid regime, providing the first official documentary evidence of the state's possession of nuclear weapons. The "top secret" minutes of meetings between senior officials from the two countries in 1975 show that South Africa's defence minister, PW Botha, asked for the warheads and Shimon Peres, then Israel's defence minister and now its president, responded by offering them "in three sizes". The two men also signed a broad-ranging agreement governing military ties between the two countries that included a clause declaring that "the very existence of this agreement" was to remain secret. The documents, uncovered by an American academic, Sasha Polakow-Suransky, in research for a book on the close relationship between the two countries, provide evidence that Israel has nuclear weapons despite its policy of "ambiguity" in neither confirming nor denying their existence.

. . . continues at the guardian (24th of may, 2010)

here's also a research paper published in 2004, which, looking at declassified south african documents, lays out apartheid south africa's rational for acquiring nuclear weapons (bombing, or 'deterring,' black liberation groups):

#palestine #israel #gaza #south africa #just thought i'd bring this back up with the ICJ hearings #the relationship between israel and apartheid south african was interesting to say the least #and yes israel has nukes; this is an open secret that the western world has collectively decided to turn a blind eye to

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inkskinned · 8 months

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they want to talk about mental illness and acceptance and how everyone is a little ocd it's cute and quirky and their "intrusive thoughts" are about cutting their hair off and you say yours are about taking a razorblade to your eye and they say ew can you not and everyone is a little adhd sometimes! except if you're late it's a personality flaw and it's because you are careless and cruel (and someone else with adhd mentions they can be on time, so why can't you?) and it's not an eating disorder if it's girl dinner! it's not mania if it's girl math! what do you mean you blew all of your savings on nonrefundable plane tickets for a plane you didn't even end up taking. what do you mean that you are afraid of eating. get over it. they roll their little lips up into a sneer. can you not, like, trauma dump?

they love it on them they like to wear pieces of your suffering like jewels so that it hangs off their tongue in rapiers. they are allowed to arm-chair diagnose and cherrypick their poisons but you can't ever miss too many showers because that's, like, "fuckken gross?" so anyone mean is a narcissist. so anyone with visual tics is clearly faking it and is so cringe. but they get to scream and hit customer service employees because well, i got overwhelmed.

you keep seeing these posts about how people pleasers are "inherently manipulative" and how it's totally unfair behavior. but you are a people pleaser, you have an ingrained fawn response. in the comments, you have typed and deleted the words just because it is technically true does not make it an empathetic or kind reading of the reaction about one million times. it is technically accurate, after all. you think of catholic guilt, how sometimes you feel bad when doing a good deed because the sense of pride you get from acting kind - that pride is a sin. the word "manipulation" is not without bias or stigma attached to it. many people with the fawn response are direct victims of someone who was malignantly manipulative. calling the victims manipulative too is an unfair and unkind reading of the situation. it would be better and more empathetic to say it is safety-seeking or connection-seeking behavior. yes, it can be toxic. no, in general it is not intended to be toxic. there is no reason to make mentally ill people feel worse for what we undergo.

you type why is everyone so quick to turn on someone showing clear signs of trauma but you already know the fucking answer, so what's the point of bothering. you kind of hate those this is what anxiety looks like! infographics because at this point you're so good at white-knuckling through a severe panic attack that people just think you're stoic. even people who know the situation sometimes comment you just don't seem depressed. and you're not a 9 year old white kid so there's no way you're on the spectrum, you're not obsessed with trains and you were never a good mathematician. okay then.

mental illness is trending. in 2012 tumblr said don't romanticize our symptoms but to be fair tiktok didn't exist yet. there's these series of videos where someone pretends to be "the most boring person on earth" and is just being a normal fucking person, which makes your skin crawl, because that probably means you are boring. your friend reads aloud a profile from tinder - no depressed bitches i fucking hate that mental illness crap. your father says that medication never actually works.

you still haven't told your grandmother that you're in therapy. despite everything (and the fact it's helping): you just don't want her to see you differently.

#writeblr #warm up #to be clear let me state again: i think you should id however you fucking want if it helps you seek peace #but there is a HUGE difference between being like '.... im undiagnosed but i think i might be X'#and a person who is like ''omg my intrusive thoughts made me buy a birkin!!!''#babe mine made me throw up bc they disgusted me so much <3 #mine made me hurt myself evenly. even when i wanted to stop. i have had to put my hand on the stove MULTIPLE TIMES #and again i'd rather have 10000 people get help for something they don't need help for #than have 1 kid NOT get help #but there has GOTTTTT to be a middle ground here #bc at this point it isn't ''raising awareness''#it's . fucking misinformation. and ''what this picture says about you!!!!!''#& yes! im mostly talkin about ppl who are actually disgusted and offended by signs of mental illness #but use it to defend THEIR actions #like babe you hate when kids start yelling in the walmart? but you YOuRSELF can yell?#you are depressed so it's fine you were cruel to your spouse?#but if your spouse spends too much time in bed she's a lazy fuck?#your partner needs to do everything for you bc of your history in trauma? but when SHE has needs she's being clingy and gross?#HUGE difference here between whom i think most of my followers are btw. like #all it takes is fucking anyyyy empathy or kindness . like.#anyway it's hard to explain im hoping we all know the person im talking about lol

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gracefuldisasters · 2 months

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Having the time of my life with this lineless style >u<

More of these! Even more of these! a teeny bit more of these

Who should be next?

#i actually had a lot of fun drawing antoine #which is something I never thought I'd ever say #all of these were great tho #sonic #sth #my stuff #silver the hedgehog #shadow the hegdehog #scourge the hedgehog #rouge the bat #sally acorn #bunnie rabbot

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moggettt · 6 months

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"If I wanted to take over the station's systems and kill everybody, I'd have done it by now."

#murderbot #murderbot diaries #the murderbot diaries #murderbot fanart #martha wells #this series speaks to me in a major way #reading it is oddly cathartic to my anxious angry autistic aroace self #also idk if I need to say it but #this is not a dude #it's also not a human so it's a bit of a moot point #but I just thought I'd throw it out there #my scribbles

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gen-toon · 1 month

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#tadc #the amazing digital circus #tadc jax #jax #tadc ragatha #ragatha #bunnydoll #I need to pathetically explain myself here and say this was just one of those go to bed thoughts I've had for a while.#It was an idea for the sake of daydreaming and I never intended to ever draw it but then it happened and I got carried away.#I'd honestly call this a bit of a un-headcanon lmao #None of us know at this point so any one of them could be close or not close to losing it.#Saying that I feel Jax seems like one of the more stable of the group and out of the both of them Ragatha is closer to abstraction if at al #But it's interesting to think if he actually isn't to some degree and there's more behind that grin I can't lie #And I wouldn't portray abstraction like this either I'd go about it differently. again just one of those fleeting throw-away thoughts #It ends ambiguously but you can decide what you want. I know how it ends.#I just got really into portraying the mood or cinematics without any dialogue.

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54625 · 4 months

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I cannot get FitMC's voice yelling "sneeg shut up I'm doing gay roleplay right now" out of my head. If I had to show one QSMP clip to the average FitMC YouTube viewer it would be that one

#top ten things i never thought I'd hear fit em fucking cee say:#fitpac #qsmp #qsmp fitmc #fitmc #qsmp fit

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esmiara · 8 months

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Eyes of glass and night of cold. I once foretold my end would come in nothing but my own hands, a death of sorts brought by a soul hidden in this cryptic mind. Impossibility for it to find a companion. Iris fixed on watery surface below a balcony, the window on my back opened in a swipe. Eyes of light and night of warmth. I raised my hand to this familiar silhouette of red. "Mind a dance, sir?" i said. A smile grew on my silent face, reflecting what i never thought could exist in this pit of mine. Maybe "impossible" wasn't a suited word, after all.

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs #soukoku #skk #nakahara chuuya #bsd chuuya #bsd dazai #dazai osamu #i don't have anything funny to say in the tags today so i just thought i'd tell a story #it might be very bad though ahah #that's fine #they're pretty anyway

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yrsonpurpose · 1 month

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So do be careful...

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gold0kapi · 11 months

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I made a new lineart brush and its changed my life

#call of duty #cod #sketches #ghostsoap #soapghost #wip #work in progress #fan art #soap mactavish #simon ghost riley #i'm living vicariously through ghost #something i never thought i'd ever say #i wanna ruffle johnny's hair

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pineapple-frenzy · 2 months

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For your post finals art request, how about something from your Zutara scars au? Maybe Zuko gently kissing the scars on Katara's hands, with Katara looking absolutely flustered.

Thanks for your consideration and time.

I love soft scar kisses so much, I hope you don’t mind that I added a touch of angst to this

I saw something recently that was like what if Zuko thinks he’s the one that burned Katara’s hands, and I really like the idea so I wanted to incorporate it into this au. So here’s a little comic about Zuko apologizing for burning Katara’s hands (which he did not) insipired by your request :>>

#zutara #zuko #katara #atla #soulmark au #my art #i like to think happens during a conversation about zuko's scar #he'd be opening up to katara about it and even telling her how it happened #he'd also talk about how he never wants to do what ozai did to him to others but he thinks he ended up doing it to katara #and that's what leads him to apologize #so when katara says it's not his fault do you think she's talking about her own scars or zuko's fukalfjlakfk #n e ways #that one drawing at the bottom is actually a redraw of one of my old art from this au #i was looking at old art from this au for reference for some of the flower placements akdjmajdkjsjd #and i thought i'd do a redraw of it cause i still like the art but i can do it so much better now djajdkskkf #but yeah thanks for making a request with this au #zk brainrot is so back #i am so back

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factual-fantasy · 9 months

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I have learned a veeeery valuable lesson while making this comic.

If I'm getting burnt out on a project and decide to take a break by drawing whatever I want?.. I absolutely should NOT make a giant comic that induces the same exhaustion that the first project did- BUT that's okay, the comic is done and the lesson has been learned. <XD

As for this comic, it was only a matter of time before I drew something angsty for my Calico Jack. You know, with him being a rough and tough pirate.. I imagine he’s been through some horrible things. Things that still effect him to this day. And the worst part about them is that he probably doesn’t even really recognize these things as problems. “That’s just how its always been.” Maybe he’d say. The fact that he cant sleep in a quiet room without his heart pounding out of his chest.. its “normal”. Its always been like that.

But then you have Natquik. He joked at the campfire about his traumatizing experience living in the Antarctic. But I think deep down he knows that it was messed up. He still knows what things are, and are not good behaviors. Jack sitting stiff on the couch, riddled with anxiety over the silence outside.. is not good. And poor Nat wants to help. But its been a long time since he’s been around people.. So the only reference he has for comforting people is his experience as a polar scout leader. Staying awake all night to guard the den so the cubs could sleep peacefully is something he would do very frequently.

It was a little silly in practice. An old fox guarding a grizzled pirate while he slept? It was odd.. but its all Natquik could really think of to help Jack..

Well, he was lucky that it was exactly what Jack needed.

#Octonauts #calico jack #professor natquik #ranger marsh #octodads #not me writing Natquiks dialogue super inconsistently-#in the other post it was ZAT now its THAT #smh #this comic also took WAY longer than I thought it would #I forgot that's the reason why I stopped coloring comics #it takes like 40 years to color them-#overall though I'd say it was worth it #the comic came out nice by my standards

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thaliasthunder · 4 months

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just rewatched pjo and istg it's like rick said "okay act" and dior said "BET"