#@jordsie

[scripts4dreamers]

Not Your Hero. Chapter 6

CHAPTER SIX

Chapter one, Chapter two, Chapter three, Chapter four, Chapter five

AN: Whaaaaaaat? A chapter of a WIP? From me? Insanity

Characters: Finnick Odair, Coriolanus Snow, Mags Flanagan, James Karakus, Annie Cresta

Pairings: Finnick x reader

Spoiler(s): None

Warning(s): Mentions of blood, death, murder, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, psychological manipulation, intimidation 

Prompt/Inspiration: House in Nebraska - Ethel Cain

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While the games are on, no one ever really leaves the viewing room. Finnick knew that, all the mentors did, but for you this was a whole new experience. He watched you pace like a caged animal, stress eat from the neverending flow of food brought in by avoxes, and talk with James in a low voice whenever something happened. He knew for a fact that you didn’t sleep at all. Some of the others did, he did, but you just sat on the couch every night with your knees pulled up under your chin, staring at the screen.

Because of that, you watched Adam Donaldson die in real time on the second night. Finnick had stayed up with you, sitting in a shared and quiet vigil because, if he was honest, he’d seen it coming. Maybe you’d seen it too, because the first tear had slipped down your cheek before the careers had even noticed the smoke from Adam’s small campfire and made the connection. Finnick wished he could say it had been quick and painless, an arrow to the heart, a snapped neck. It wasn’t. It had been a slow day and Finnick knew better than anyone how those kids were trained, first and foremost, to entertain. He tried not to watch Annie, tried not to watch you watching Annie, reminded himself not to tell you that Annie was a good girl, really, that she was just doing as she was told. Compassion would come later, he promised himself, for now you were living one of the worst moments in a mentor’s life. You wouldn’t appreciate a spirited defense of your tribute’s killer.

It took the careers three full hours to finally put Adam Donaldson out of his misery, and you didn’t make a sound the entire time. You didn’t shift or move or eat. You barely blinked. Adam screamed and bled and died, and Finnick watched you bear it, adding another lost life to the list of sins you could never really really be forgiven for. A few mentors tried to stop by and comfort you but you brushed them off or snapped for them to leave you alone, like an animal in a trap. Finnick was the only person who was spared your annoyance so he held your hand and didn’t let go. He didn’t try and tell you that it wasn’t your fault, he knew you wouldn’t have listened. Instead, he just promised that it would be over soon. Just hang on, he whispered again and again, just hold on for a little longer and then it’ll be over. If nothing else, it would be over.

When the dust settled and the remaining body fragments had been collected, Finnick had watched something in you deflate and his heart pinched. He knew that moment, the pain, the guilt, the relief. You’d made it through. You’d gritted your teeth and made it through.

“First one’s the hardest,” Haymitch had slurred, shocking Finnick, who hadn’t thought Haymitch had even noticed what was happening, “Gets easier,” he shrugged, “or so they keep telling me.”

You gave him a look, as though you were weighing up the benefits of biting his head off, but eventually you just nodded, “Thanks, Haymitch.”

“Don’t thank me,” he replied, “I didn’t say it gets bearable.”

Finnick felt a rush of protectiveness sweep over him, but he forced himself to just stay at your side until you assured him that you would be alright, and then he allowed himself a rest. You returned to your pattern. You watched the male tribute from Four get beheaded by a rival a few days later, watched Serena slip away into the darkness, clutching a bleeding shoulder that wouldn’t heal, watched Annie’s psyche start to crack as she isolated herself and cradled the air, imagining it was her partner’s bloody body. And you told it all to Finnick each morning in a dull, monotone voice, the bags under your eyes getting darker and darker with each passing day. He wanted to help. He wished that there was something he could say or do to help you deal with the grief, but he couldn’t. He had to focus, to keep his eye on the end point and, right now, he had other things on his mind.

Annie was AWOL.

Losing Ajack had broken something inside of her. You’d told him the whole story; about how he’d gotten into an argument with the boy from District one, how they’d pushed and shoved at one another until the boy from one had picked up an ax and ended it, hacking at Ajack’s neck while his partner held Annie back. Apparently she’d screamed at the boy to stop, begged him even, and after Ajack’s head had been completely severed, she’d held his body for so long that the hovercraft hadn’t been able to collect it until the early hours of the morning. After that, she’d vanished, disappearing into the bush without any supplies. Whenever the camera found her now, she was muttering to herself, or fiddling with her fingers, or staring out into space like she wasn’t there anymore.

Finnick had never felt more helpless. He’d chewed his nails down to the beds, and used every tool of persuasion in his arsenal to keep sponsors from pulling out. He supplied Annie with food and water, with sleeping gear and climbing supplies. None of it had helped. Now, as he clung to the very edges of his sanity and wracked his brain, he had to admit: he was out of tricks. There was nothing else he could do. The sponsors had pulled out in favor of the pair from district one; Annie had no weapons and, even if she did, she was in no fit state to use them and, worst of all, it had been nearly two days since the last gruesome death. That usually meant one thing; the crowd would be getting antsy and the gamemakers would be planning something awful. He watched Annie’s lifeless body on the screen as she twitched and muttered in her sleep, his heart twisting into painful knots.

“Finnick!” Annie screeched, giggling as she scrambled up the rocks and away from his attacks, “Stop! I don’t want to get wet.”

“Why?” he laughed, pushing up off the ocean floor and letting himself float on his back.

The cool water lapped against his temples, filling his ears and cradling his body in its strong, reliable arms. He loved the water, lived for it. There was nowhere that he felt more at home, or more like himself than when he could taste saltwater on his lips and feel sand on his skin. His stomach churned with anxiety and a mixture of fear and anticipation, but he breathed in deep, filling his lungs with bright sunlight and the smell of warm ocean rocks and let the rocking of the waves soothe him.

Annie was perched on the rocks like a seabird, her long dark hair swirling and tangling in the wind as she watched him swim, a kind of quiet longing in her eyes. Not for Finnick himself of course, but for his comfort, for his ease in the ocean. Annie was terrified of the sea, she always had been. She was a strong swimmer, as all the kids in district four were, but she’d never trusted it, never truly believed that it could carry her and support her weight. She always felt, privately, in the back of her mind, that it was just waiting to drag her under, to a dark watery grave. Finnick opened one eye and gave her, what he hoped was, a confident smile.

“Like what you see, Cresta?” he joked

She scoffed, a delicate blush coloring her cheeks, “You wish.” she paused, worrying at the inside of her cheek, “How are you never nervous? It’s reaping day, and you haven’t even broken a sweat.”

Finnick pushed forward, tipping into a steady tread, and shrugged, “Nothing to be nervous about. We’re fourteen, Annie, it’s not going to be us.”

“It might be,” she argued, “York said that none of the older kids are volunteering this year.”

“Why wouldn’t they be?”

Annie shrugged, “They just aren’t.”

“But they have to.” He insisted, “That’s the rules.”

“We haven’t won in years,” Annie reminded him, “I think they’re just sick of volunteering to die.”

Finnick pressed his lips together, feeling the cold hand of dread creeping into his chest again. No volunteers? That was unheard of. What would happen now? A normal reaping? Could anyone be picked now? Could he be picked? He met Annie’s eye and saw his own terror reflected there in vibrant sea green.

“It won’t be us, Annie,” he assured her, hoping that he sounded more confident than he was, “I promise you, it won’t be us.”

Finnick’s eyes started to sting and he swore softly under his breath, burying his head in his hands and carding his fingers through his hair. It felt like his heart was shattering piece by piece and dragging him down into the depths along with it. Out of the corner of his eye Finnick saw a familiar shadow and, despite everything, some of the tension in his shoulders relaxed. You collapsed onto the couch beside him, reaching out and resting a hand on his back comfortingly. God, he hated how good that felt. He hated how he longed to lean into your touch, to bury his head in the crook of your neck and weep like the broken boy he was. I’m just a kid! He wanted to scream, I can’t do this! I can’t do this anymore!

“I know, Fin,” you whispered, as though you could read his mind, “you’re doing so well.”

A tear slipped down his cheek and he shook his head frantically, “Annie’s screwed. The sponsor’s are gone, she’s barely eating. There’s nothing I can do to save her.”

You were quiet for a moment, “There’s never anything we can do, really. It’s always just a big gamble.”

“I know but-”

“And you aren’t out of sponsors. I spoke to my guys and they’re going to back Annie since-” You pressed your lips together, “since Adam’s gone and Serena-well-she’s not going to be able to hold on much longer.”

Finnick’s head shot up, a mixture of relief and incredulousness filling him so suddenly that he wasn’t even sure he’d heard you right.

“What? Y/N, no-I can’t accept that.”

You shrugged, a hint of a sad smile at the corner of your mouth, “Good thing you don’t have a say then. Take the help, Finnick. If not for you, then for Annie. She needs you on top of your game right now.”

He remembered the way Adam had called for his mother, how you’d flinched as each slow, deliberate cut had chipped away at the person he’d been until there was only a bloody corpse. Annie had been a part of that but, looking at you now, it didn’t seem to matter.

He shook his head again, the momentary relief being swallowed up again by hopelessness, “She can’t win. She can’t even seem to walk in a straight line right now.”

For a long moment you just watched the screen together, two victors acting in perfect synchronicity. You watched the pair from district one slice through the underbrush like demigods, looking powerful and determined and painfully self-assured. Smart money was on them, anyone could see that. They had everything on their side; all the training, all the sponsors, all the gear and, most dangerously, that deadly team mentality that would keep them together until it stopped serving them. Finnick knew how powerful that bond could be, it had kept him alive more than once during his games and his every instinct told him it would get this pair through it too. However, as useful as weapons, sponsors, food and allies were, you’d had none of that. You’d been alone from the moment you were reaped. You had no skills, no real buzz, no friends. No one had given you more than half a look in the Capitol, and you’d come out on top anyway. The thought gave Finnick hope. Maybe Annie wasn’t completely screwed. Maybe, with you by his side, Finnick could still find a way to bring her home.

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No one had really believed Annie Cresta had a shot. Not James, not Chaff, not Brutus, not Seeder, not even Mags really. When Ajack had died, every reliable metric in the book had said that district four’s hopes of having a winner on their hands had died with him. But every reliable metric in the book had also had you pegged as an early death, so you said fuck the metrics, and believed in her anyway. The more you felt Finnick give up, the harder you believed. The more other mentors started to gently suggest that you let her go and move on, the more vehemently you insisted that she wasn’t out of the game yet and redoubled your efforts. At some point over the past few days, possibly when she’d gone against her team and given Adam the death he’d long since earned, Annie Cresta had started to mean something to you.

She was every discounted tribute, every long shot who got written off and left to die. She was you, and she was the tributes you’d already failed to save and, maybe, if you could find a way to bring her home, you would be able to live with yourself for letting Adam and Serena die. Serena’s arm was infected now, badly. Experts said she had maybe three days of agony in front of her and there was nothing you could do to save her. But Annie was healthy. Some part of her mind had gotten her to eat and drink, she wasn’t physically injured, and a lifetime of having enough to eat gave her stamina.

She could win, and she would, you told yourself again and again. She had to.

You told Finnick too, and when you did some of his old sparkle would threaten to rear its head and he would almost smile. Almost. It never lasted. He slipped in and out, between resigned, grieving and unimaginably tense. Sometimes, you had the sneaking suspicion that your hand between his shoulder blades was all that was keeping him anchored to this reality. So you kept it there, and you fed him bits of biscuits and sandwiches, got him to drink water, shower and sleep, and you wondered how long he would last, and what would be left of him if Annie didn’t make it out.

Selfishly, unforgivably, a part of you wondered if he was in love with her. You would never ask, of course. It wasn’t your business, it wasn’t the right time, but you couldn’t stop the wondering. Was Annie the one who Finnick lay in bed pining for? Was she the woman he daydreamed about and had planned a future with? Did it bother you if she was? Always, it came back to the same single fact; it didn’t matter. You wanted Finnick to be happy, and you needed Annie to come home. That was that.

Some days you were so close to the edge that it was only the memory of Finnick’s voice in your head that kept you from crumbling.

Just hold on, he’d whispered, you’re so strong, you can do this, it’ll all be over soon. It was like a mantra now, more than a prayer, a promise that this too would pass. There would be time to fall apart, time to grieve, just not yet. First you had to get through, and get Annie through.

You spent your 17th birthday throwing a massive party for potential sponsors. It was the event of the season, the magazines exclaimed, absolutely anyone who was anyone was invited. Finnick and Mags weren’t there, a few noted, but that was to be expected this far into the games. Your prep team hid the signs of exhaustion under layers of makeup and pressed fake finger nails over your chewed ones. Your stylist pulled you into a tight, revealing outfit that, months ago, you would have been too self conscious to wear out, strapped you into some heels and you were ready. The music was loud, the press was there and the party lasted all night. You let the tv crews interview you, you gushed about the Capitol, choking down disgust. You danced with those victors who had come in support of you, and you flirted and teased your way to raising enough money to buy Annie some iodine for her drinking water.

Back at the control center, after you had scrubbed off the remnants of the powders and creams and sickly sweet perfumes and slipped into something more comfortable, Chaff brought you a cake shaped like a lightning bolt. James took responsibility for all the presents the other victors, and your various admirers, had lavished you with. You and Finnick ate pieces of cake together on the couch, sighing with relief as Annie successfully treated her water and took her first long drink in two days. You didn’t think about your last birthday.

After Chaff and James had led everyone in a genuinely enthusiastic bout of “Happy Birthday”, Finnick nudged you with his arm, tearing your attention away from the screens, where the pair from one were hot on the trail of the boy from nine.

“Happy birthday, Y/N/N,” he said softly, his deep green eyes sparkling with something so sweet it made your teeth ache, “I-”

“You don’t have to say anything,” you interrupted feeling, with certainty, that he was going to apologize for not being with you in the sponsor pit, “there’s more important things right now.”

Finnick smiled with a fondness that had you feeling uncomfortably found out, and he strung an arm around you loosely, turning both of your bodies so you were facing each other. It was the first time you’d seen him look fully away from the screens and monitors in days.

“I was going to say that I’m…I’m glad we met,” he explained, “and that I hope, for your next birthday, we can do something a little less morbid.”

You pressed your lips together, feeling oddly touched, and tried not to think about how, for that to happen, both of your tributes next year would have to be dead.

“Thanks, Finn,” you said instead, “I’m glad we met too.”

He took your hand and kissed your knuckles gently, sending a tingle of electricity through your entire body as he pressed a small gift into your palm.

“For later,” he explained, as you examined the parcel.

You nodded in understanding, slipped the parcel into your bag and, again acting with the perfect synchronicity of two people with identical goals, you both turned back to your monitors to watch for signs of trouble.

Two weeks into the games, after everyone had written her off, you knew Annie had won. It happened quickly, a few days of rain, some flooding and a crack. The dam seemed as though it fell in slow motion and, in mere moments, all the perfectly laid plans Cashmere and Gloss had been working on all season fell to ruin. Serena barely stirred as the wave crashed down on her, by all accounts she died in her sleep and you counted it as a mercy.

The gamemakers slowed the wave, so it didn’t flatten the competition entirely but, by nightfall, even those who could swim were starting to struggle. The beautiful arena was now entirely flooded and Annie was swimming. Not paddling around, not hanging on for dear life. Instead, for the first time since Ajack’s death, she was virtually coming to life. She gilded through the water like a sea otter, evading the other tributes with ease and finding safe areas to rest away from the dangerous currents and undertow.

“She’s going to make it,” Finnick said incredulously, “Oh my god, Y/N, she’s going to make it.”

You nodded, “Hell yeah she is.”

A few stragglers held on for a while but, after another two days, Annie Cresta was airlifted out of the drowned arena, the official victor of the 70th Hunger Games. When the final canon sounded you couldn’t contain the sound of relief and excitement that slipped past your lips, somewhere between a laugh and a sigh. It was like watching a dream play out in real life. When you looked at the screen you saw yourself, felt the momentary rush of terror followed by pure ecstasy as you realised that the impossible had happened: you had won, you were going home.

She had won. She was coming home.

If you were happy, Finnick was joy personified. He leapt to his feet and cheered, laughing with the unrestrained incredulousness of someone who had been well and truly hopeless for ages. You smiled up at him as he watched the screen hungrily seeing, for a moment, his youth written on his body like a sign. It was easy to forget sometimes that he was only eighteen. It was easy to forget that you yourself were only technically an adult with how old and world weary you already felt. You tore your eyes away from Finnick and let them fall on Mags who was weeping silently, a wrinkled hand pressed to the base of her throat as she smiled. She caught your eye and extended her free hand for you to take. You gave it a squeeze and you hoped she could feel your sincerity, how truly happy for district four you were. A year after you had personally ripped their chances away, they were bringing home a win. It felt almost fair.

“I didn’t think I would see another win,” she explained to you softly, “not in my lifetime. I didn’t think I would get to bring another one home.”

“But you did,” you said, looking back at Finnick, “you did it.”

Mags shook her head, giving your hand another squeeze, “You did it, the both of you. Finnick is a wonderful mentor, but even he couldn’t have gotten any more help to her without your sponsors. I won’t forget that.”

“You don’t have to-”

“I won’t forget that,” she repeated, “and I’ll make sure he never does either.” she finished, gesturing at Finnick with her head.

At that exact moment Finnick seemed to remember your existence and he turned back, sweeping you up into his arms and spinning you around like a carousel.

“We did it!” He laughed, “We did it, Y/N, we did it!”

“We did,” you agreed, laughing fondly as you detangled yourself.

For the briefest moment when you broke the contact Finnick seemed crestfallen, but it was over so quickly, swallowed up by his happiness, that you almost thought you must have imagined it. He pulled Mags into a similar embrace, whispering something to her too low for anyone but Mags to hear before looking back at you.

“You and me, Y/N/N, we fucking did it!”

You heard Adam’s voice in your head, saw him strain at the restraints on his wrists as he was tortured and jeered at. His sister had watched that. Sweet, kind Genna, who laughed a little too loudly and never quite knew when to stop being friendly, had watched her older brother get systematically and clinically taken apart and she would probably never be herself again now. Serena had been just kid, she hadn’t even started high school yet. She died after days of agony, with a raging fever. Her father had wept when she was reaped. They had been yours, and you’d been less than useless to them. Suddenly you were so tired, so drained. How many days had it been since you slept? The fragile pieces of you were cracking under the strain. James caught your eye, the corners of his mouth tense with suppressed grief. You don’t know what you were looking for really. Not comfort, not saving, maybe an acknowledgement? The shared recognition that something had happened, something had been lost here.

“You lot better get ready,” James said to Finnick and Mags, coming to your rescue, the way he was wont to do, “Annie is going to need you both. You don’t want her to be alone when she wakes up.”

Finnick looked like he wanted to argue, but a brief word from Mags seemed to remind him where he was. He shot you and your mentor an apologetic look, but you could still see the shimmering, bubbling excitement just under the surface, ready to burst forward at any second.

“Thank you,” he said seriously, “both of you. Just-” he breathed, letting out a burst of relieved laughter, “thank you so much.”

You felt James’ hand on your shoulder, a rough but familiar anchor to reality and you gave Finnick a genuine smile. Just a little longer, you heard him whisper in your mind, just keep it together for a little longer.

“Of course,” James said, speaking for you both, “it’s the least we could do.”

That was a lie, but you all knew it, so it couldn’t hurt anyone.

“I’m so happy for you,” you said, “truly.”

Some of Finnick’s franticness seemed to seep out of him into something softer and fonder and you watched, in real time, as he remembered where you were, what you’d lost, what you’d been through.

“Y/N-” he started, moving as though to step toward you.

Your eyes were pricking now, the suppressed panic and rage rearing its head so powerfully that you were almost frightened of yourself. James tightened his grip on your shoulder and, in one fluid motion, moved subtly between you and Finnick, angling his body in such a way as to not be obvious but still clearly making himself a barrier. Finnick recoiled, a flash of hurt crossing his perfectly sculpted face. You wanted to assure him, your instinct was to reach out and promise that you were fine, that he’d done nothing wrong, that of course you wanted to stay and be with him and Mags, but you were just so fragile. James felt like a lifeline, like your protector, swooping in and delivering you from the private hell you’d been living in and, if you were honest, there was nothing you wanted more than to fall apart in private.

Mags tracked the interaction with her eyes, tugging Finnick’s arm gently as he stared James down.

“Come, boy,” she said soothingly, “Annie will be waiting.”

Finnick gave you one last deeply apologetic look, and then nodded, letting Mags pull him away. James didn’t move. He stayed where he was, waiting until every last mentor, even drunk old Haymitch Abernathy, had slipped out of the control center before he stepped forward and crouched down in front of you.

His face was creased with concern, his dark eyes filled with the deep understanding that only someone who had personally put you back together more than once could ever have, and you absolutely shattered. In moments you had collapsed into a fit of broken sobbing, keening like a wounded animal as weeks of pent up anxiety and fear rushed out at once. To his credit, James didn’t try to calm you down, he just let you cry. He’d always been wonderful at knowing what you needed, how to get you through the pain without smothering you or talking down to you. Even before you were a victor. Even when you were just a scared fifteen year old girl who’d been handed a death sentence.

It felt like you stayed there for an eon, working through every last drop of resentment and disappointment in yourself until there was nothing left but a sort of deep, throbbing ache.

“I am happy for them,” you eventually said, voice shaky through your tears, “r-really I a-am.”

“I know,” James assured you kindly, “I know, but you can be happy for them and furious for us at the same time. I know they were when you won last year.”

You nodded, feeling the first slivers of solid ground beneath your feet again as you wiped your face and took deep, steadying breaths.

“Did you cheer and twirl people around too?” you asked, trying for a joking tone and almost succeeding.

“Oh yeah,” he answered, “you bet I did. I was fist pumping the air and shouting like a maniac, I thought Finnick was going to swing on me. I think I threw a chair.”

“What?” you laughed incredulously, “You did not.”

“I’m pretty sure I did,” James insisted, “Y/N/N I was so proud of you. I cried like a baby for days.”

You sniffed and wiped your eyes again, welcoming the change of topic, “You did?”

He nodded, giving you another fond look and giving your shoulder a squeeze, “You were amazing, you did everything right, made good on every opportunity. I did my job, I set things up but you just…” he shook his head, whistling, “you just ran with it. I’ve been doing this for twenty-three years and I’ve never seen anyone come close to the upset you pulled off.”

You felt something that could have been pride, a stubborn urge to take some pleasure in your win, before the sadness won out again and your lip began to tremble.

“Fat lot of good it did them,” you said, “fat lot of good I did them.”

James sighed, “That’s what I’m trying to say here, there’s nothing you could have done. You made it out because you played smart, you fought hard, you kept your wits about you and you clawed your way to the top, not because I did something to get you out.”

“I had sponsors.”

“Not at first,” James admitted, “not enough, not nearly enough. You convinced more people to put their money behind Adam from the start than I’d managed to rustle up for you. At the end of the day the money means jack shit, there’s only so much we can do.”

“I told them to shift their pledge to Annie,” you whispered, Serena’s shaking body flashing behind your eyes like snippets of film, “I could have poured more into Serena. I told them not to, I told them to sign with Finnick and-”

“And Annie won.” he reminded you kindly, “Those rich idiots will blame you for their massive payouts and they’ll trust you implicitly now. How many more kids will you be able to help with their money in the coming years, hmm? The handful of die hard rich people we still had available to us couldn’t have raised the funds to save Serena from that infection, Ash, you know that.”

“I could’ve done something! I could’ve-”

He shook his head, “No, you couldn’t have. Listen, whatever you think you could’ve done, I’ve tried it. I’ve tortured myself with what-ifs for longer than you’ve been alive, they never work. Trust me, you did everything right.”

You tried your hardest to listen, to really take in what James was saying like he was offering you a balm for your aching heart, but the pain just sat there in your chest, stubbornly refusing to dull.

You felt your eyes start to prick again and you longed for home, for your mother’s embrace and the safety of your room.

“Then why does it hurt so much?” You cried, collapsing into James’ chest again as you devolved into a fresh bout of sobs.

James doesn’t have an answer for that, so he just held you close and tried to be as comforting as he possibly could be. James’ feelings for you were….surprising, to him at least. When he’d turned thirty-nine he’d joked to Ivette that the only thing he wanted for his fortieth was to make one return journey to the district with a living person. Just one, he’d laughed with an edge of franticness, he wasn’t asking for the plethora of success stories the mentors from some of the other districts had, he just wanted one.

It had been a joke, mostly, but here you were. When he’d first met you on the train after the reaping, there’d been a sort of ache in the back of his teeth, like the ghosts of the countless hours spent biting down on his jaw were finally coming back to haunt him. You were so young, he remembers thinking, not yet sixteen and already doomed to die. Only…there was something about you, something in your eyes that felt like defiance. It felt like anger, like the will to live. James had looked at you on the train and had seen himself, but even that hadn’t been enough to override his deep dread. He’d lost too many to have any real hope for your survival. At most, he hoped you would die quickly, and without suffering.

He still did his job, of course. He smiled, he made contacts with possible sponsors, liaised with stylists and publicists, he gave you advice on how to play smart, and he mapped out a place along his spine to tattoo your name, alongside the nearly forty others he carried with him, when you died. Unfortunately, as the big day came closer, James had gotten sort of fond of you. You were funny and smart, and you had a sharp tongue that made him laugh incessantly, but that also spoke to how personable you could be. Your interview had been a smash hit. You had an instinctual knack for grabbing an audience’s attention and holding it. For the first time in decades, James had felt something resembling hope, but he crushed it down. He reminded himself that there was only so much he could do, that personability wasn’t enough. He’d settled down and re-resigned himself to watching you die and delivering you home in a box.

The games started and when you made it through the first day, and the second, and the third, that damn spark of hope had come back in full force. It was small, he tried to temper it but when, on the fourth day, you’d managed to literally tear your way out of a net with a combination of your hands and teeth, and had successfully rewired the trap to spring up and capture your original capturer, he’d known that you could win. James had never worked the sponsor circuit that hard. He barely slept, he did anything and everything he could to get you whatever you needed; medicine for your bloody hands, food, some wire and, eventually, a current generator. He’d poured twenty-two years of dashed hopes and dreams into you, broken every carefully cultivated rule he’d ever set for himself about not getting attached and, when Claudius Templesmith announced that you were the winner of the sixty-ninth annual Hunger Games, he had wept like a baby and cheered until his voice was hoarse. Just two months shy of his fortieth birthday, James had gotten to make his return journey with you by his side, broken, battered and scarred, but alive.

Afterwards, James couldn’t quite shake his feelings of responsibility for you. He was still your mentor and you were still his tribute, and now the game he was determined to get you through was just life, the After of it all. He had never been able to bring himself to find a nice man and settle down or to have some kids of his own, but if he had, he imagined he might feel about them the way he felt about you. So this, sitting with you in his arms while you fell to pieces…well, it hurt pretty damn bad.

“Y/N/N,” he said gently, when your body had stopped heaving and your violent sobs had softened and faded, “let’s get you home, yeah?”

You nodded, wiping your eyes with the heel of your palm, and James couldn’t help but see your youth. You were a couple of days past 17, practically a baby in his eyes, and already the kind of tired that most adults don’t get until their mid-forties. You knew too much, you’d seen too many horrors and carried too much grief to ever be carefree, the way a 17 year-old should be and, for the millionth time, James felt the rush of pure, black rage bubble up in his stomach. He would tear the Capitol down for this, he promised himself. Not today. Not now, when Snow could take revenge for anything James did out on you and Ivette, but someday. Someday he would find a spark and he’d do what he did best, what had gotten him in that victor’s chair in the first place; he’d stoke it into a blaze, an inferno that would burn out the infection of the Hunger Games for good.

You let your mentor pull you up and walk you back to your apartments, now empty of tributes, and you clung to him like a child, wondering why you could so easily let yourself be held by him, but not by your own parents. Some small part of you wondered if this is how it started, if all those lonely victors you’d met, who had no one but each other, had once had family and friends who they couldn’t bear to be around anymore because they reminded them too much of a version of themselves that was long dead. It felt different, you noticed, as you and James sat down for dinner at an empty table. Not bad, just different, knowing that, on every floor but one, someone like you, with more scars than they deserved, was sitting down to dinner in an equally vacant apartment. Everyone had failed except Mags and Finnick. It should have felt depressing and morbid, and it was, but it was also a kind of solidarity. You weren’t suffering alone. The Capitol had done this to all of you, together and, in a way, that meant none of you were alone. Maybe this was your new home, maybe this was what you got now.

You waited until you were alone in your room to open Finnick’s present. It was small, about the size of a plum, wrapped in soft blue paper and twine. It looked too rustic for the Capitol, you noted with a sudden rush of warmth, as though he’d brought it from home just for you. Slowly, being careful not to tear the wrapping paper, you peeled it open, revealing a beautiful spiral shell, cleaned and polished, and woven bracelet. It was a combination of brown leather, blue chord and flat pearls braided together carefully, with practice and skill. Finnick and Mags both wore similar bracelets, you’d seen them weaving them aimlessly whenever they got stressed, but this was different. This one had been made for you. It wasn’t flashy, or polished, but it fit your wrist perfectly and you knew that, if it was your choice, you’d wear it forever. Slowly, you pushed yourself up and made your way over to the phone, dialing the extension for the floor below you.

“Y/N,” Finnick said, without hesitation, on the third ring, “I’m so sorry, I can’t believe I was so tactless, I-”

“What would you have done if I was James?” You interrupted, smiling despite yourself, “I could have been James, you know?”

Finnick paused and then laughed, his voice tinged with barely suppressed exhaustion, “But you’re not James, are you? You’re my-” he corrected himself, “you’re Y/N/N. Mags made me promise to give you some space, but I knew you’d call.”

You hummed in agreement, worrying at the inside of your cheek as the silence stretched, warm and comfortable, “How is she?” you eventually asked.

“Annie?” Finnick asked, “she’s…she’s alive. That’s all that matters.” he continued with a deep sigh, “Her mind is fragile right now, I’m not sure she understands what’s happened exactly, but…yeah.”

“It’s early days, Finn,” you replied instinctively, “you remember what it was like at the start. I’m sure you were a little fragile too. She’s been out of the arena for less than 5 hours, give her time.”

“I knew where I was,Y/N,” he countered ruefully, “I knew it was over, I knew I’d won.”

You sighed, “Give her time,” you repeated, “she’ll come back to you when she’s ready.”

“The doctors say she had a psychotic break,” Finnick said, his voice small and vulnerable, “they say she might not ever…that she might always be…”

“She’s alive,” you interrupted, reminding him of his earlier words, “you’ve got the rest of your lives to figure out how to move forward from this, and yeah maybe she’ll always be a little fragile. That’s alright, we’ll take care of her when she needs us to.”

“We will?” Finnick asked hopefully.

“Of course we will,” you insisted, “you, me, Mags, Chaff, James, even Haymitch. We’re all here for you, and for her.”

“I’m sure Haymitch has some thoughts about that,” Finnick replied, jokingly.

You smiled, “Yeah well, he’ll have to take it up with me if he does.”

“Terrifying,” Finnick said, and you could hear the smile in his voice. Again, you sat in silence, just enjoying the sound of one another’s breathing, before Finnick continued, “ Did you open your present?”

You looked down at the bracelet, “Of course I did. Thank you, by the way, it’s beautiful.”

“Pretty bracelet for a pretty girl, what can I say? Just made sense,” Finnick joked, slipping into his old seductive persona, which pulled a breathless laugh from your chest. You could imagine the catlike grin on his face as he lounged against the wall, all faux grace and elegance, the picture of destructive beauty. “But really, you like it?” he asked in his regular voice.

“I love it,” you promised.

There was a pause on the line, and then Finnick let out a shaky breath. You could feel the exhaustion in your own body catching up to you again, the weeks of staying awake using expensive Capitol medication finally coming for their due.

“I-uh-I need some sleep,” you explained, “I’ll see you soon, Finn.”

“See you soon, kid,” he replied, “and thank you again for-”

“Stop thanking me,” you insisted, fondly, “and don’t call me kid.”

You hung up before you had a chance to change your mind and, as you lay down in your bed and drifted off to sleep, the ghosts of the veldt crept in, joined by two new faces; a tall, lanky boy with a sister who laughed too loud, and a young girl, clutching an infected shoulder, writhing with fever.

—

Finnick stared at the phone for a long time after you hung up, trying to parse his emotions in a way that made sense. His heart was a complete wreck, torn between grief and joy and hope and, fuck it, why hide it, love. Annie was alive, but broken. You were safe, but exhausted. He had his family, but he had secrets, and he’d never be able to stop towing the line without risking losing it all again.

“I love you, Y/N,” he whispered into the empty air, covering his mouth with his hand.

Beetee had assured him that he’d blocked the audio bugs in the apartments, but old habits die hard, and Finnick wasn’t taking any chances. Not with this. Not with you. He ached for the feeling of your hand between his shoulder blades, the comforting weight that had kept him grounded for weeks and that he’d grown to rely on without even noticing it. You had a strange way of worming your way into him like that, like a drug. One hit and he was hooked for months, chasing more time, chasing more closeness.

“Finnick, dinner’s ready!” Mags called from the dining room, “The doctor sent us updated reports on Annie.”

“Coming!” He responded, casting one last look at the telephone as he left, adjusting the band of woven leather, chord and pearls on his wrist.

#jordsie #jordsie writes #The Hunger Games #thg #thg imagine #hunger games #hunger games imagine #the hunger games imagine #finnick odair #finnick x reader #finnick odair x reader #finnick imagine #finnick odair imagine #finnick x you #finnick odair x you #reader insert

[batllethinker]

Daan was in london for the arsenal v west ham game, everyone came back

#her and jordsy #the arsenal submissions

[j-brielmalfoy]

Theseus Scamander

《Moodboard》

@jordsie It's inspired by your story, before Theseus becomes an auror ♥️

#theseus scamander #aesthetic #harry potter #gryffindor #love #friendship #friends #theseus x reader #learning to love #@jordsie #moodboard

[theletterhart]

FicRec

“cuddle buddy” by @bukojuiice (katsuki bakugo x reader - boku no hero academia) (37 chapters) - (y/n)is a soft, kind-hearted, quirky, and meme queen university student who lives alone in a cute little apartment complex. she mistakens bakugo katsuki for her old neighbors; an old woman and her granddaughter whom she absolutely adores. she leaves a giant teddy bear every day before the sun rises for the little girl to see. not knowing that they had moved out suddenly, katsuki who had just moved in had never seen such a huge fluffy abomination all his life that it nearly gives him a heart attack. chaos ensues and you try your absolute best to make it up to the explosive cutie that is your next door neighbor.

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“bouncing baby” by @theamberwriter (shouta aizawa x reader - boku no hero academia) (4 chapters) - shouta aizawa and his wife used to live a peaceful life. but once their one-year-old daughter, kohaku, starts getting her quirk, and his wife becomes a school nurse, nothing is peaceful anymore.

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“the deeds of right and wrong” by @shelby-love (anthony bridgerton x reader - bridgerton) (3 chapters) - in the season of 1813, anthony realizes that he can’t stand the thought of reader being married to someone that’s not him.

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“lavender’s grey” by @tabloidteen (kit x reader - cinderella) (5 chapters)

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“hey brother” by @specialagentlokitty (aaron hotchner x winchester!reader - criminal minds/supernatural) (6 chapters)

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“tea & scones” by @jordsie (theseus scamander x reader - fantastic beasts) (2 chapters) - theseus scamander ducks into a bookstore and finds more than he bargained for.

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“silent devotee” by @swellwriting (draco malfoy x hufflepuff!reader - harry potter) (14 chapters)

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“tattoos & sweatshirts” by @rosegoldquintis (ron weasley x reader - harry potter)

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“amends” by @abovethyfold (ricky bowen x reader - high school musical: the musical: the series) (9 chapters) - that’s asking a lot of the theatre gods. then again, it does include a lot of drama, so maybe it might just work out.

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“it wasn't real” by @justauthoring (richie tozier x reader - it) (11 chapters) - you’re part of the infamous loser’s club, and often asked, what are you afraid of? you reply, nothing, but what your friends don’t know is that your biggest fear is them.

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“heartless” by @futurewriter2000 (sirius black x reader - marauders) (21 chapters) - what happens when you get along with your twin brother but not with his best friend? and what happens when you stop trying to compete with his best friend for your own brother’s attention? but you and sirius grew up side by side because of your brother, willingly or not and now you have to spend a whole summer because one by another.

“penny for your thoughts” by @writingfortoomanyfandoms (sirius black x reader - marauders) (5 chapters) - y/n y/l/n has lived in the potter household since she was eight years old. even amongst the potters, whom she knew loved her, she has never felt truly accepted, never felt like anything other than a burden. until she went to hogwarts. for the first time she had friends who weren’t forced to act as such, she had a family who loved her by choice. there, she met sirius, the first and only person to ever truly understand what she was going through, to listen to her and not judge.

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“enhanced” by @weirdochick56 (bucky barnes x reader - marvel) (6 chapters) - y/n loved mysteries. more than she loved life itself. see, y/n had always been an anomaly. weird. a cast-out. an outsider who’d become invisible to everyone around her entire life. nothing could change the fact she was an alien with weird surges of power not even she understood. or so she thought.

“heal me” by @rogue-barnes-16 (bucky barnes x nurse!reader - marvel) (10 chapters) - she was a nurse. he was a soldier. they fell in love at first sight. it was beautiful, true love. but something isn't beautiful because it lasts.

“reckless” by @anaboo-thewriter (street racer!bucky barnes x cop!reader – marvel – the fast and the furious au) (12 chapters) - the fast and the furious au. you’re an undercover cop with a mission to infiltrate a team of street racers responsible for the theft of millions of dollars’ worth in electronics. however, you didn’t think you would fall for the leader of the team and your target, bucky barnes. now you must make the decision, will you turn bucky and his team to become an fbi agent you’ve always wanted to be, or throw caution to the wind and continue to fall for a criminal?

“white wolf” by @captain-ariel-barnes (mob!bucky barnes x reader - marvel)

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“fever dream” by @unicornofdanger (peter parker x reader - marvel) (4 chapters) - leaving her past behind her, y/n finally has the life she’s been waiting for, working for the avengers and being around people that love her. but that all comes crashing down when her past comes back to haunt her and she’s forced to deal with it. but she doesn’t believe that those closest to her will stay by her side, even her boyfriend, peter, when her secrets come out.

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“anything” by @o-b-x (jj maybank x reader - outer banks) (5 chapters) - in which you fall for your childhood best friend.

“could it be” by @outerbankswriting (jj maybank x reader - outer banks) (12 chapters) - she has a crush on jj, but he has always seen her as another one of the “dudes”, or at least that’s what she thinks so she just doesn’t even try anymore, until things start to shift between the two of them.

“threat of joy” by @futuretaxcheat (jj maybank x reader - outer banks) (3 chapters) - jj and y/n could barely tolerate each other. the pogues were all aware of jj’s childish behavior when the boy was around y/n, but never bothered to call him out. that is, until the girl has finally had enough of it, and the blond finds himself questioning his own feelings.

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“upside down” by @inyourwildestdreamslove (sweet pea x reader - riverdale) (16 chapters) - you don’t know much about sweet pea, except for what you hear in the hallways around school. you pass him on your way to and from classes and you’ve perhaps brushed his arm a hand full of times. you don’t know him and he doesn’t know you. that is until you save his baby sister from the ghoulies all while simultaneously getting involved in a world you want nothing to do with and events you would rather stay out of. too bad the ghoulies have other ideas…

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“his property” by @negans-lucille-tblr (dean winchester x reader - supernatural) (30 chapters) - when y/n starts a relationship with dom dean winchester, she moves into winchester manor with him and his younger brother, sam. but sam doesn’t agree with their lifestyle, and it isn’t long before he grows an unhealthy obsession with wanting to treat y/n like more than property. she deserves more, so much more. she is perfect. she is everything he wants and he is going to get her.

“her property” by @negans-lucille-tblr (dean winchester x reader - supernatural) (part of “his property”) (10 chapters) - things finally seem to be going well. family life is good and john and lily are getting married. but their wedding brings ghosts from the past back home and y/n is left to deal with the consequences. sam seems to have changed for the better but is it enough to finally forgive him? or will she let her need for revenge consume her?

“yours” by @negans-lucille-tblr (dean winchester x reader - supernatural) (sequel to “his property”) (10 chapters) - it’s been 9 months since dean admitted his feelings and became yours. things are going well, but the past has secrets and secrets have consequences.

“royal duties” by @becs-bunker (prince!dean winchester x knight!reader - supernatural) (9 chapters) - you’re a knight to the royal family and the personal guard of prince dean. your friendship with the royal is surprisingly good, until you discover a secret that could threaten the entire kingdom.

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“smoke and fire” by @writingsbychlo (thomas x reader - the maze runner - firefighter au) (17 episodes) - thomas is the lieutenant of the squad team at firehouse ‘21, and has a stick up his arse so high it’s a surprise he can still walk. or, that’s what you believe, at least. you’re a paramedic, with an attitude problem and the inability to settle down, so there must be something wrong with you. or, that’s what thomas believes, at least. maybe there’s something you both need to get over.

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“his flower crown” by @iwriteisthatenough (klaus mikaelson x reader - the originals)

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“liar” by @brianprobablywill (ben hardy x reader - fake dating au) (15 chapters) - ben knew he could rely on his best friend for anything. anything in the world. but this… he knew he was pushing it

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“i need you” by @writingfortoomanyfandoms (calum hood x reader) - the relationship through the years

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“according to plan” by @corpsesbaby (corpse husband x reader - fake dating au) (6 chapters) - when corpse is finally fed up with a streamer named avalanche who will not stop flirting with him, he asks for your help to get rid of her. what’s starts as a simple fake dating set-up to try and shake her off, proves to be a lot more difficult as you ensnare yourselves more in the lie that starts to act more like a truth. where do you draw the line? how much can you take before you fall? find it out in according to plan.

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“common courtesy” by @madmadmilk (harrison osterfield x reader) (4 chapters)

“love and light in hell” by @skymoonandstardust (harrison osterfield x reader)

“the tea shop girl” by @lamptracker (harrison osterfield x barista!reader) (21 chapters) - harrison osterfield falls for the cute american girl that runs the tea shop just down the street. this is their story.

“the art of pretending” by @h-osterfield (harrison osterfield x reader – university au) (17 chapters) - being more of a part-time student at the university of the arts london for film and television and part-time hype man for his best friend tom holland, there usually isn’t a day where harrison doesn’t show up late and hungover to class. as a role model student you try your best to stay out of trouble - especially if the boy trouble involves harrison osterfield and tom holland. what happens when both worlds collide nonetheless?

“bite me” by @beautifullydisconnected (vampire!harrison osterfield x vampire!reader) (3 chapters)

“mal en point” by @tominhoodies (king of hell!harrison osterfield x angel!reader) (15 chapters) - heaven fucking sucks.

“tidal wave” by @hazofmyheart (lifeguard!harrison osterfield x lifeguard!reader - fake dating au) (5 chapters) - the dreamy new lifeguard on your crew is really good at his job and even better at catching people’s eye with his undeniable charm and shimmering baby blues. his most notable rescue, though, is swooping in when your dodgy pool manager asks you out only to claim you as his girlfriend. the fake dating ruse is anything but easy to keep up with cutthroat glares from fellow coworkers and pool patrons alike. so why does it seem impossible to break it off?

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“the perfect dates” by @eurynome827 (sebastian stan x reader) (7 chapters)

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“perdify” by @peeterparkr (tom holland x reader) (21 chapters) - tom and you have been sworn enemies since you were young. however you happened to be best friends with the twins. when one of your friends challenged you to break tom’s heart, you immediately accepted to get back at him for all the times he’s hurt you. old feelings might come back, while both of you try to go past your pride and your lies.

“perennial” by @peeterparkr (tom holland x reader) (sequel to “perdify”) (18 chapters) - after the war, tom let the flowers die of thirst, harry decided to water dry flowers and timmy never stopped taking care of his. but flowers speak for us, flowers have meanings. and like flowers, maybe you’ll keep on blooming, it’ll be up to you if you decide to wither. and it’ll be up to you what flower you end up choosing.

“sweetener” by @keepingupwiththeparkers (tom holland x reader) (25 chapters) - okay, so maybe lecture hall proximity and roast calibre weren’t the only reasons for your frequent visits to this particular coffee shop. maybe there was a certain brown eyed brunette who worked there, and maybe he always gave you two stamps on your loyalty card instead of one, and maybe you liked watching his back muscles shift under his stupidly tight t-shirt while he pumped sweet vanilla syrup into your cup. maybe.

“adventure of a lifetime” by @hollandsosterfield (tom holland x reader – tarzan au) - when tom’s parents’s boat ran aground on an island during a storm, his parents thought their baby was dead. they were able to leave the island, but little tom was trapped on the island until a gorile mother saved his life and took him under her wing. he grew up with gorillas, learned their lifestyle, it was like second nature until he met you. when you wants to leave the island to visit another one, tom have to choose between his adoptive animal family and this civilized world he dreams of discovering and the girl he’s falling for.

“remember when” by @h-osterfield (neighbor!tom holland x reader) (16 chapters) - tom holland used to be your friend. he was your first crush, your first kiss and your first heartbreak when everything started to fall apart. three years later, the two of you still live next to each other. what happens when he sees you coming home with puffy eyes and tears rolling down your cheeks? will he continue to act like he hates you or will he try to fix his mistakes?

“blow a kiss, fire a gun” by @hollandroos (mob!tom holland x reader) (20 chapters) - tom holland, leader of a notorious mob and someone with absolutely no time for love and relationships. he's cold, arrogant and yeah, has a lot on his plate.so what happens when he gets shoved into a deal that includes getting married to a girl he's only ever seen in photos? a girl that has no idea about the deal until the day of the signing at that and most importantly- a girl that likes to press his buttons and isn't intimidated by the gun on his hip.

“run to me” by @hollandroos (mob!tom holland x reader) (sequel to “blow a kiss, fire a gun”) (20 chapters) - you and tom are still dealing with the events from five years ago. however, some wounds are still fresher then others. tom is still running the mob, living as dangerously as ever with very large regrets and you’re living a more settled life- though, that may be an understatement.

“clear” by @peeterparkr (surfer!tom holland x reader – fake dating au) (20 chapters) - y/n is in town for summer, she wants the sea to wash away the pains of the past, however when a certain surfer comes into her life, the remaining salt might not decant, but maybe some sweet surprises might come to shore

“dog days” by @waitimcomingtoo (single dad!tom holland x vet!reader) (2 chapters) - tessa is sick and you comfort toms son

“heart like yours” by @mcuspidey-archive (boxer!tom holland x artist!osterfield!reader) - an underground fighter, caught up in his own world of darkness and his best friend’s sister, an artist who radiates color. she’s the light he’s always needed but doesn’t want to admit it and maybe she shouldn’t love him. because a heart of gold deserves better than one drenched in poison.

“not like us” by @blissfulparker (frat!tom holland x reader) (2 chapters) - you over hear some things tom said to harrison and it turns out your relationship has been something tom doesn’t want the rest of the world to see.

“clear” by @peeterparkr (surfer!tom holland x reader – fake dating au) (20 chapters) - y/n is in town for summer, she wants the sea to wash away the pains of the past, however when a certain surfer comes into her life, the remaining salt might not decant, but maybe some sweet surprises might come to shore

“night of our lives” by @ijustreallylovezebras (ringmaster!tom holland x animal trainer!reader – circus au) (3 chapters) - she’s an animal trainer, he’s the ringmaster, he doesn’t understand her

“the grand spectacle” by @hollandroos (ringmaster!tom holland x trapeze artist!reader – circus au) (8 chapters) - you’re a runaway and tom offers to take you under his wing as long as he can teach you trapeze and make you an act in his circus. he doesn’t question why exactly you ran away, that is until he notices a few strange habits you possess.

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"meet me on the football field" by @dysfunctionalcrab (character!dreamwastaken x reader - dream smp - high school au) (10 chapters) - you were always the invisible one at school. the one who would sit alone at lunch time and go unnoticed, until you were partnered with dream, your schools football captain, for a chemistry project. suddenly everything changes for you. for once, you’re the one everybody has their eye on.

#fic rec #bukojuiice #theamberwriter #shelby-love #tabloidteen #specialagentlokitty #jordsie #swellwriting #rosegoldquintis #abovethyfold #justauthoring #futurewriter2000 #writingfortoomanyfandoms #weirdochick56 #rogue-barnes-16 #anaboo-thewriter #captain-ariel-barnes #unicornofdanger #o-b-x #outerbankswriting #futuretaxcheat #inyourwildestdreamslove #negans-lucille-tblr #becs-bunker #writingsbychlo #iwriteisthatenough #brianprobablywill #corpsesbaby #madmadmilk #skymoonandstardust

[rostovs-lover]

Hey hey! Can I request a Bash x reader imagine where the reader is Mary’s younger sister and she doesn’t know Bash has been in love with her since they were children?

Like Children

Sebastian De Poitiers | major spoilers, brief mention of character death | female reader | fluff, pining, kinda slow burn for a short fic | wc.927

goodness its been a while since I’ve watched Reign, I’m so sorry if Sebastian is out of character. I also hope this isn’t as choppy rushed as I thought it was. I hope you enjoy! (Note: I’m on mobile so I can’t put the cut in, when I get computer access I will add it)

The French court had seemed unimaginable, something (Yn) had only heard about from her sister’s letters and a few brief visits when they were younger. That was until she was there, after Aylee’s murder when Mary sent for her younger sister. Now that she was stuck in a stuffy room, it was almost underwhelming. (Yn) got along with everyone, she always had, and it was nice to finally see the girls she had spent so much of her young life with. It was lonely though, lonelier than she had expected, and she had a newfound sympathy for the way Mary laminated in her letters. 

There was a knock, “Lady (Yn)?” 

She turned around, letting the curtains she had pushed back to stare out the window flutter around her. Sebastian was standing in the doorway and (Yn) almost didn’t recognize him, “Sebastian,” It was his eyes, that’s why she knew who he was. 

“I,” He cleared his throat, “I heard you’d returned to court,” 

She stepped away from the window towards him, “Yes, I arrived earlier today. It’s just as a remembered it yet so different,” 

“Well Lady (Yn), would you like for me to show you around?” Sebastian offered his arm to loop with hers.

(Yn) grinned, Sebastian realized it was the same way she always had, and accepted his arm, “What a polite offer, who would I be to decline?” 

**

Horse hooves clopping against gravel was the only sound in the quiet woods but Sebastian hardly realized. His mind was elsewhere, on Lady (Yn) Stuart and the soft way she spoke to him while they walked the gardens. He hadn’t thought much of Mary’s younger sister, not until the afternoon when he saw her again for the first time in years. Perhaps, he realized, he had chosen not to think of her, pushed her out of his mind. They had been close when they were younger and Mary had come to court with her ladies and (Yn). He could recall a certain feeling for the girl but he had simply brushed it off as a childhood infatuation. They were older now though and he still felt so strongly towards her, Sebastian couldn’t pinpoint the feeling though. Was he in love?

**

Wandering the castle in the dead of night may not have been the smartest of ideas but it was entertaining and (Yn) hadn’t been caught yet. The thought of seeing any respectable person at this hour while only wearing a nightgown crossed her mind, what an impression to make. 

The soft thump of boots against the stairs made her heart start to race and she tried to find a corner to duck around. She rushed around a wall towards a set of big double door and skidded to a stop, leaning on the wall to catch her breath. 

“Lady (Yn)?” The voice was familiar, much softer than usual seeing as it was so late, but familiar none the less, “What are you doing?” 

(Yn) peeked around the corner catching a glimpse at the approaching figures dark hair, “Goodness Sebastian, you scared me!” 

“Well milady, seeing a gown-clad figure rush through the dark hall of the castle isn’t the most welcome sight either. Why are you up?” 

(Yn) felt her face begin to flush, “Well I couldn’t sleep and why stay cooped up in my chambers when there’s so much of this castle that I haven’t seen in ages. I didn’t expect to see anyone,” 

Sebastian smiled, “Well I suppose a bit of an adventure never hurt anyone,” 

**

The soft candlelight flickered against the walls of the tunnel and a grin grew on Sebastian’s face. 

“I cannot believe I’m doing this,” He whispered, “Wandering through these passages at this hour. I don’t think I’ve done this since I was a child,” 

“Me either,” (Yn) picked at a thread on her nightgown, “I remember being terrified of these when we were first at court. I didn’t know where they would lead and I thought that I might get lost and never find my way out. One night Mary convinced me to come to follow her down one, we walked for so long. I got a bit frightened, I was worried we’d never see the light of day again but Mary being Mary, she found a way out.” A comfortable silence filled the small space as the pair wandered a bit further. 

Sebastian swallowed and steadied himself, “Lady (Yn)?” 

“Yes?”

“I think I love you,” 

(Yn) stared at him for a moment, “You… love me?” 

“I believe I do. It’s not anything new either, I’ve felt something for you since we were young but I brushed it off, told myself it was simply being a child and that it would go away but it didn’t. It never did, I’ve loved you since we were children (Yn) but I’ve only just realized it. I think when I saw you for the first time this morning it dawned upon me that these feelings were not-” He shook his head, “- Are not just a silly liking. I love you (Yn),” 

“Oh, Sebastian,” She stroked his cheek, “I believe I just might love you too,”

“Well then,” He started with a grin, “that’s quite a coincidence I’d say,” And he kissed her. 

(Yn) patted his cheek as she pulled back, “I believe we should get back before its sunrise and people start to worry about our whereabouts,” 

Sebastian chuckled, “It would be rather unfortunate to go missing on your second day at court,” He laced his fingers with hers, “Now best not get lost in these tunnels,”

#Sebastian De Poitiers #bash #reign #Sebastian De Poitiers x reader #Sebastian De Poitiers imagine #bash x reader #bash imagine #requested #jordsie #runes writing

[teenwolf-theoriginals]

Hi!!!

I wish that I could hate you, my baby We went from 2 a.m. calls to zero communication, yeah I've been thinkin' bout you Put on a brave face You broke me first

Send me a ‘hi’ and I will put my playlist on shuffle, write down the first line of five songs and give it to you as a poem.

#jordsie #ask #ask game

[rose-is-in-the-void]

I don’t understand a thing about astrology but I am trying really hard bc I want to be able to message @stardustjords more than just ‘😊’ everytime they mention it

#jordsy💕☀️ #i want to learn more about their interests bc i want to be a good friendo😂

[captainpettie]

Gryffindor // Capricorn // ENTP // Wampus for @jordsie​

“ The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience. ” - Eleanor Roosevelt

#jordsie #hope you like it! #my edit #aesthetic #gryffindor #gryffindor aesthetic #capricorn #capricorn aesthetic #entp #entp aesthetic #wampus #wampus aesthetic

[gangrenados]

Reckless

I missed writing about Marcus so much 😭

Warning: sensuality...kinda and blood

He couldn't help but taste the blood that fell from his nose, a nasty way to entretain himself as you did your best to clean up one of his many wounds. Macus was a reckless guy, but more than that an idiot for trying to beat Viktor in a fight.

Yeah, you still remeber Viktor punching Marcus in the stomach as he did his best to get out of his grip. It was a nasty fight, some students were shouting happily as the boys tried to slash each others throats, Marcus had the upper hand for a brief moment, achieving hitting Viktor's head with enough force to make him tremble.

It amased you how he always managed to get out of fights without being demolished, maybe the street boy had some tricks under his sleeve.

And now you were in his room, such a messy one to say the least since Marcus' comics and Shabnam notebook were scattered across the floor and that playboy magazines lying under Shabnams' bed didn't passed unnoticed by you.  

"You're an asshole." Marcus frowned when you pushed his head to the side, you looked so angry it was kinda cute. He hissed at the contact of cotton pressing against thee scarred skin of his cheek, it as like you were trying to punish him for his earlier acts.

"Oh c'om don't be like that!" Marcus complained, but his cheeky smile gave him away perfectly. You rolled your eyes, so done wiith him for the moment but you couldn't dare to leave without trying to talk some sense in your stupid boyfriend.

You loved Marcus deeply, it was scary to care for someone while living in hell but things were in this weird way and you had to deal with it.

It was sad the way Marcus use to jump in the first trouble he found, sometimes trying to play the her and others to just prove he has the worth to be in King's Domions like the other crazy people who ere stucked in it. That made you worried he will end up dead like rat one day.

"One day you're gonna get killed because your mouth." you said concernly, looking him down with th most serious face you could make."So don't be a little bitch and behave."

"I can be a little bitch or a big bitch, whateve you want me to be." Marcus wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you closer to him. You didn't want to give in into his worlds, but it was hard when that pretty face was looking at you straight to the eye.

His fingers danced above the waist band of your skirt, it was tempting the way his eyes sparked viciusly. Marcus liked his lips quickly, playing his part of seduction to take your mind of off the fight. "So, what you want,baby?"

You put ypur hands on his shoulders, "I want you to think a little bit, okay?" Marcus cliked his tongue at your words, not expecting you to sit down on his lap."But I guess we can talk about that later, right?"

Deadly Class tag list: @conyt1007c @lovelyartemisa @c0-77 @pretendthisusernameisgoodd @miliablr @xerxes-break4ever @mistalli @jordsie @barnowl48 @unknowntoanyone @hecatemacbeth7 @thandeka800 @uniteran @uhohscarlett @cinnamon-cola @hopejungguk @mooneeishorny @ietss @nyeddleblog @drowned-in-vodka69 @sparklnkageyama @thandeka800

#deadly class x reader #deadly class headcanon #deadly class imagine #deadly class #Marcus lopez arguello #marcus lopez arguello headcanon #marcus lopez arguello x reader #marcus lopez arguello imagine #marcus lopez imagine #marcus lopez headcanon #marcus lopez x reader

[myfavoriteficss]

The 100 Masterlist

This Masterlist includes all of The 100 fan fiction I have reblogged. Enjoy.

Updated: 05/06/2021

Masterpost

1. Lexa

Written by: @alyssawritesss

DATING COMMANDER LEXA WOULD INCLUDE… (HC)

LONG LIVE THE NEW QUEEN

Written by: @better-than-waking-up

I Can’t Lose You

Written by: @helloalycia

unwanted swim

Written by: @imaginesforgirlswithgirls

Don’t Be Afraid

Written by: @jordsie

Goddesses

Good hair day

Gasoline

Dison laik ain

Written by: @loveissacrifice15 ?

Jealous

Written by: @moonlight-imagines

Commander Lexa x Reader (They say I love you for the first time)

Written by: @philthepegacorn

I Need That Kind of Strength

Written by: @somefangirltrashh

Skai Kru Warrior (Part 1)

Written by: @the100imagine

Tradition.

Written by: @violets-page

Heart on Fire: Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4

Written by: @wlwhc

Project Prometheus

2. Octavia Blake

Written by: @better-than-waking-up​

She Surrenders

Always

Written by: @blkmxrvel

All These Years

Written by: @imagine-the-100

Special Occasion

Written by: @heda-murphy

Loving Someone

Written by: @jordsie

Cry baby cry

Talk time

Written by: @octavia-marie-blake

ALWAYS HAVE BEEN

Alive

Written by: @the100imagine

Thrill Seeker.

A Second Chance At Being A Second.

De-Stress.

Written by: @wlwhc

Hotter Than Hell Part 1

Written by: @wukindly

Feelings Aren’t Meant To Be Kept To Yourself

3. Raven Reyes

Written by: @helloalycia

clumsy

butterflies

Written by: @margothedestroyerr

Lies

Written by: @the100imagine

Wrench Monkey

Aether

Written by: @wlwhc

Sunstroke

#the 100 #octavia blake #octavia blake x reader #lexa #commander lexa #lexa x reader #masterlist #raven reyes #raven reyes x reader

[scripts4dreamers]

A New Day

AN: Was this based on that shifting thing on Tik Tok? Yeah, yeah it was. I love a parallel universe, okay?? Characters: Regulus Black, Marlene Mckinnon variant, Dorcas Meadowes variant  Pairings: Regulus Black x reader  Summary: What if, instead of drowning, Regulus managed to slip into a new world. Your world. 

--------

Regulus had planned for months. He’d double checked all the calculations, practiced until his eyes went fuzzy and then practiced more. He could hold his breath for nearly 4 minutes, do the most complex spells wordlessly and keep almost anyone out of his head. He was ready. No one in the history of the wizarding world had ever understood Voldemort better than he did and Regulus Black was ready for his tricks. He was getting out of this mess and taking Voldemort down at the same time and there wasn’t a damned thing the Dark Lord could do to stop him. He was ready.

Having said that, he’d never expected his plan to actually work. As the mangled corpses dragged him beneath the water and his throat burned with a cursed thirst powerful enough to drive someone mad, Regulus had fully expected to die, but he tried anyway. He’d pushed through the pain, held his breath and began his incantation, ready for the moment that nothing would happen and he would start to drown. If he hadn’t practiced the spell so much that it was almost effortless, he probably wouldn’t have had the strength to go through with it. But he had, so he did and, to his surprise, it had worked. Just when he thought he’d run out of air he felt the hands dragging him down start to lessen, he heard a strange rustling in his ear and a tugging behind his ribcage like nothing he’d ever experienced. The pain of drowning was replaced with the pain of being ripped in two. He opened his mouth to scream, remembering the water a moment too late. It was filling his mouth, filling his lungs, drowning him. Drowning him! At least the pain would end, the terrible terrible pain of it. Merlin, why wasn’t it ending? Make it end! And then-

Well, then he’d landed on an empty road, gasping for air on his hands and knees, with tiny bits of gravel digging into his exposed skin. For a moment he couldn’t believe it was real, that all that work had paid off. He thought it must be some trick, a last cruel game that Voldemort concocted. Give them hope and rip it away, that had always been his style. But as time passed and he caught his breath, Regulus was forced to accept the fact that he’d been right. He’d really done it. The relief was so intense that he didn’t notice that he was laughing until the tears started streaming down his face. It just felt so completely, impossibly unbelievable that he was finally free. He was soaking wet, it was starting to get cold and he was definitely in shock, but Regulus forced himself to look around. He was on a deserted country road, on a hilltop surrounded by long grass and old, gnarled trees. The sky was starting to darken and he could hear the hustle and bustle of a town somewhere in the distance, symphonic with the bugs and the breeze. He pushed himself up, ignoring the protest of his worn out body and stumbled to the nearest tree, collapsing against it so he could watch the sun set on his new world. A world without magic.

Reality bending magic was more advanced than anything Regulus had ever even considered in his youth but, as the war went on and his situation became darker and more hopeless, he figured he had nothing to lose. A million things could have gone wrong, the least unpleasant of which would have been him dying instantaneously, but he did the work anyway. He didn’t have a lot of requirements for his desired new reality. In fact, he only had four: No Regulus Blacks already in that reality, no Voldemort, no death eaters and no wizards. And somehow, he’d gotten it all.

Regulus sipped his coffee absentmindedly, taking a moment to ground himself in the here and now. He let his eyes drift shut and took some deep breaths, the way his doctor had taught him to, letting the cool spring air fill his lungs completely, and then letting it out slowly. Even now, five years later, Regulus could never quite get past the feeling that he was drowning, that the water was right there, outside his lips, just waiting to slip into his mouth and drag him into the depths. But that was just a memory now. He was safe, he was free. The only thing left from his old life was currently sitting behind the glass windows of a bookstore, with a big gold sticker on the front celebrating it as a 20th Anniversary Special Edition.

“Have you really never read Harry Potter?” You asked, snapping him out of his reverie.

“Hmm-What? No, I haven’t-” he replied with a distracted smile, “is it good?”

You shrugged with one shoulder and took a sip from your drink. You were trying very hard to be nonchalant but he’d known you long enough to recognize the way your eyes lit up . The book meant a lot to you. While you looked at the books, Regulus tried to subtly twist his hand in just the right way, and was rewarded by a rush of steam coming from your cup. You always hated when your drink got cold.

“You love it, huh?” He asked, nudging your shoulder with his.

You blushed and rolled your eyes fondly, “I hate that you can do that. Yes, okay, I love it. Those books practically raised me, but the author is a TERF and there’s a bunch of problematic shit in them and so I also kind of hate them. For making me love them, you know?”

Now that was a relationship he could understand.

“Oh yeah. So, not worth it for me, then?” He asked, feeling the familiar roiling of curiosity and anxiety in his stomach that talking about the book always caused.

You gave him a surprised look, “Oh no, you should definitely read them, just don’t buy them. You can read my old copies, I’ve annotated all the gross shit in the margins.”

“Why’d you ask if I’ve read it? You guys bully me enough for it for you to know.”

“It’s just such a major coincidence,” You said, not for the first time, “I mean, Regulus Black? What are the chances of that?”

He shrugged, “It has to happen sometimes, I mean there’s only so many names in existence. Regulus is a real star and Black is a fairly common surname.”

It was a familiar lie, but it still tasted wrong when directed at you. Some people bought it, some didn’t. He’d been reminded by some of your friends, very gently of course, that there was no shame in choosing to name yourself after a character. People choose new names when they decide to live as their true selves all the time, they would say. Privately, he wished he’d known that before he’d started introducing himself as Regulus Black. A new name would have saved him a lot of trouble. On the other hand, if he’d decided to go by something else, he might never have met you.

—

It still felt wrong to be going out without his wand, but the drinks at these parties were always good, and honestly he enjoyed the company. One of the things no one tells you about being ripped from your dimension by ancient magic and placed somewhere new at the tender age of eighteen was that everyone in your new hometown probably already has friends, and it’s not like you can send an owl to your friends, because they’re all fictional here. And dead, he reminded himself, they’re also all dead. He pushed that thought away with another shot of something foul that burned the back of his throat, and refocused on his surroundings. Thank Merlin for university towns, where he could blend in a little more, and where no one was shocked to meet someone new who didn’t quite know their way around yet. When he’d shown up here four years ago he’d expected a lot more pushback, only to find that it was registration season for the local university. It was quite prestigious, so no one batted an eye at a stranger. A few days of research, some sneaky spell casting and, before he knew it, he was all set up and ready to start classes.

“Oh. My. God, you’re kidding!” The person he was talking to squealed, their eyes widening with surprise, “No way is that your name. Did your parents name you that?” Regulus nodded, pleasantly tipsy and already very used to this conversation. The person gasped again, running one hand through their thick, blonde hair, “Jesus Christ, that’s borderline child abuse. I mean, it’s alright when it’s a wizard-nazi in a kid’s book, but who ever met a med student named Regulus?”

“Well, technically, you just did,” he pointed out, teasingly, ignoring the rush of shame, “a lot of people at our school have, actually. Is it really that bad?”

Marble looked up, their eyes widening in horror as they realised what they’d said, and he couldn’t help but laugh. They were clearly drunk and mortified by the idea that they might have just been rude. It was endearing. They reminded him of another blonde who used to stick her foot in her mouth a lot, a friend of his brother’s. They’d played against each other in Quidditch.

“No! God-sorry-no it’s not bad, it’s just weird is-all. I mean, who’m I to judge, really, my name’s Marble. Granted, I gave myself that one.” They blurted out quickly.

“I like the name Marble,” he replied.

They smiled, “Cheers, mate! I do too. So does my girlfriend, Dora. She helped me pick it, actually. Her and my friend Y/N,” they continued. At your name they gasped and grabbed his arm, smiling like they’d just made a marvelous discovery, “oh my God, Y/N. You have to meet Y/N, she’s going to love this.” they assured him, dragging Regulus through the crowds of drunk university students and towards a group of people talking and laughing in the kitchen.

“Y/N!” Marble called, “Y/N meet my friend, I’ll bet you can’t guess what his name is.”

One of the people turned and Regulus felt his breath catch in the back of his throat. It was like looking at the ocean, he thought to himself, or the sun, that’s how beautiful you were. When you smiled at him and stuck out your hand for him to shake, Regulus felt like he was eighteen again, stumbling around on shaky legs, drunk on his own freedom and terrified at the endless possibilities in front of him.

But he took your hand anyway, because he couldn’t help himself, and he heard himself say, “Hi, I’m Regulus Black.”

—

That had been almost a year ago. The best year, Regulus could say with certainty, of his entire life. He loved his classes, he was finally starting to feel like he’d found his feet in town, he had an apartment and a job. And he had you. Well, alright he didn’t have you, per say. Not the way he wanted to, but he had you in his life, and the friends you now shared, and that was a hell of a lot more than he’d ever expected.

His first two years in your world had been a lesson in self-preservation. Everything he encountered was new, he spent most of his time just figuring out how things worked, how to get places and make food and how to keep himself alive without magic. Not that he didn’t still use magic, he absolutely did, but the problem was that no one else did. Everything he knew from his world was pointless in yours, so getting used to that had taken time.

The next two were about rehabilitation. Deprogramming, they called it. After one of his classes he’d come across an advert for a support group for people who wanted to transition out of hate groups and, well, Regulus had in fact been part of a hate group, so he went. It was a kind of work he’d never done before, like digging thorns out of his skin after the skin had already healed over. It had ached and stung and hurt, but it had also felt good. Freeing, almost. He still went to the support group, but now he was leading meetings, helping other people the way the group had helped him. He remembered when he first got up the nerve to tell you about the group, to tell you what he’d been (in modified terms, at least), and how you’d taken his hand and said you were proud of him for making the right decision.

On bad days, when he felt the water creeping in, he clung to that memory like a life jacket.

“I guess you’re right,” you continued, “It’s still so weird.”

He shifted his weight from one foot to the other, “Do you-you think it’s dumb?”

You looked up quickly, blushing again, “Oh God-no, Reg, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that,” you assured, reaching out to squeeze his free hand, “I love your name. It’s beautiful. That’s not what I meant.”

“Y/N’s a beautiful name,” he countered softly, squeezing your hand back briefly before letting it go.

“Thanks, Reg.”

Without another word you turned away from the bookstore together and continued your slow walk back to the house you shared with Marble and Dora. It was a little private ritual you shared, and Regulus treasured it above almost everything else. He glanced at you out of the corner of his eye and smiled when he caught you glancing back. Almost everything.

“What did you mean?” He asked after a moment of comfortable silence.

“Hm?”

“You said you didn’t mean like that,” he explained, “so what did you mean?”

“Oh, um,” You smiled sheepishly, and shook your head “nothing, it’s stupid.”

Oh now he had to know. You had this habit of doubting yourself that made Regulus crazy. He wanted to show you that nothing you thought was stupid, that he loved hearing all of it. Every bizarre dream, every late night rant, every embarrassing story, he wanted to know it all. He stored everything you told him away in his mind like pirate’s gold, along with all the good memories he’d made over the years. Late at night he’d pull them out one-by-one and examine them, like artifacts and try to let them muffle the sounds of his past screaming in his ears.

He bumped you with his shoulder, relishing the brief contact, “Bet it’s not.”

“You’d lose that bet.”

“I’d still like to know,” he assured you softly, “I like to know what you think about things.” he lowered his voice, “About me.”

It was a risky move, but not one he took lightly. Regulus Black thought everything through, he was meticulous, but you made him want the risk. He loved making you smile, making you blush and roll your eyes in that fond way you did. He loved that you let him tease you but, more than that, he loved that you let him in. You told him the things you usually kept private, you teased him back. When you were together, you were happy. He made you happy. A few months ago he’d gotten sick. You’d spent two weeks at his apartment, nursing him back to health and after that things between you were…different. You were more nervous around him, your looks lingered sometimes, like you were searching for something. When you were out with friends, you always ended up next to each other. He hadn’t seen you go home with anyone. It was new, and delicate, and Regulus wasn’t quite sure what was happening, but he knew he wanted it. He knew he wanted you, in whatever way he could have you.

You sighed, but shot him a sheepish look, which he knew meant that you were caving, “You can’t laugh.”

He mimed locking his lips, “Scout’s honor.”

“You didn’t even know what that meant until Edgar told you last month,” you pointed out fondly.

“But I know now, so it counts.”

You laughed gently and the sound made Regulus feel like he was floating.

“Alright then,” you agreed, “I meant it was weird because, when I was a kid, I had a massive crush on Regulus in the books.”

Regulus stopped in his tracks, “I’m sorry, you what?”

Your face was bright with embarrassment and Regulus had to remind his lungs to keep breathing, “What? People have crushes on fictional characters like all the time!”

“You said he was barely even in the books!” He pointed out incredulously, “You said there were only a handful of mentions of him.”

“There were but like,” you paused, covering your hands with your face, “he was cool! He basically took on Voldemort all on his own when he was like 18, that’s awesome.”

“He was a death eater.”

“He joined at 16, and he literally died trying to bring Voldemort down,” you countered.

Regulus snorted, and continued on his way, you falling into step beside him, “Which is barely a redemption arc. One big heroic sacrifice doesn’t undo being a nazi, you know?”

Especially since I didn’t actually die, he thought to himself.

“I know,” you sighed, “but it’s just so tragic. Sirius didn’t even get to hear what really happened.”

Ouch. No matter how many years passed, Regulus couldn’t help but hurt whenever someone mentioned his brother. He should have sent a letter, or a patronus, something. He should have-

“And I think, if he’d lived, he would’ve made the right choice,” you continued, snapping him back to the present. You looked so certain that it made his heart ache, “like you did. I actually think you two would have gotten along well.”

Doubt.

He let the silence sit for a moment.

“Wait so why is it weird? Because I have the same name as a fictional character you liked?” he clarified.

This time you definitely flushed. The sun had barely risen. The whole street was lit up in that early spring morning chill. With the streetlights overhead and you by his side, Regulus thought it felt a lot like magic. Real magic, and he wished he could freeze everything exactly like it was.

“Well, no,” you admitted, “not just that.”

“Then what?” he pressed.

You shot him a helpless look, “Don’t make me say it.”

He frowned, stopping again and reaching out to stop you too. Your house was in sight now, he could just let you go, but he didn’t. There was something sad in your eyes, something he’d put there, and he wanted to know what it was so he could stop it from ever happening again.

“Say what?” He asked, searching your face for clues. When you didn’t answer, he stepped in, holding your arms as though he was steadying you, “Hey, Y/N/N, it’s me, Reggie. You can tell me anything, you know that, right?”

Your eyes watered a bit, but you nodded, “I know. I do know that, Reg.”

“Then talk to me,” he said softly, reaching to touch your cheek, “please?”

You rolled your eyes at yourself, “It’s st-”

“Don’t you dare say it’s stupid,” he interrupted, “don’t you dare.”

You pressed your lips together and then sighed, leaning in until your forehead was pressed to his sternum and your arms were loosely hanging on his waist. Instinctively, Regulus wrapped his arms around you, wondering if you could feel the way his heart was pounding in his chest.

“It just isn’t fair,” you started, your voice a little bit muffled by his sweater, “because it’s so obvious right? You have a crush on a book character when you’re a kid and then you grow up, go off to university, meet this incredible guy and he just happens to have the same name? What are the chances of that?” you complained, “But at first it’s all fine and you’re just friends, but then he gets sick and, for a moment there you think he’s going to die and-” you looked up and Regulus could feel the way your breath stuttered in your chest when he held your gaze, “and it sucks because you’ve already fallen for one Regulus in your life, right? So you can’t fall for another one.”

Oh. Oh, you can’t. He didn’t expect anything else, so it shouldn’t fucking break him the way it does, but he feels it like a sledgehammer in his chest. And he can’t cry, because you’re being honest, and you’re still in his arms and that has to count for something. That has to be enough.

“But you do anyway,” you continue softly, “even though you know he’s not being honest with you. And even though he’s your best friend and it’s a huge risk, it doesn’t matter because he tells you your thoughts aren’t stupid. And he holds your hand when you’re nervous and you don’t even need to tell him you’re nervous because he just knows. He doesn’t know how post works, but he knows you better than anyone and you fall for him.” The words are pouring out of you now, and Regulus is trying to process what you’re saying, but all he hears are those last four words on repeat. You pause, “And then you tell him in second person on just a random street and that’s dumb because you probably should have made it more romantic, but it’s done now and you can’t take it back and-”

You Fall For Him.

He kisses you before you can finish. He doesn’t even know that he meant to. Looking back, all Regulus can remember is the way you were looking at him, the way you felt in his arms and the sudden realisation that he was exactly where he was always meant to be. That, no matter what had happened, no matter what path he would have taken, the only place he could ever truly belong was right here, in your arms. So he’d kissed you, because he had to. Because he didn’t have the words to tell you what that felt like yet, and because he really, really wanted to kiss you.

You tasted like your drink, and that first breath he’d taken as a free man and also like the sweets he’d stolen from his brother when he was young. Your hands pressed to his chest felt like running down the stairs on christmas and your lips against his were like catching the snitch in the final match of the season. Everything he missed, everything he longed for, all of it was you. All of it. Everything he had was yours, for as long as you’d have him. In any world, any moment in time, he was utterly and irrevocably yours.

When you broke apart, breathless and flushed, Regulus pressed his forehead to yours, feeling the hot flames of desire as they rushed through him.

“Y/N I-I’ve been-I have-” he paused to collect himself, breathing in impossibility that was his life, the sheer joy of it all, “Merlin, Y/N, I fell for you the moment we met, possibly even before then, but I need to be honest.” he braced himself for the impact, for the pain of losing you.

I’ll get her back, he promised himself. I’ll earn her trust back, no matter how long it takes. No matter what I have to do. This will not be the last time I get to hold her.

“Y/N I-”

“Am not really an incredibly sheltered homeschooled kid who just entered the real world, but am instead somehow the actual Regulus Black from the Harry Potter book series? Yeah, I figured,” you teased, with a breathless laugh.

Regulus’s head shot up, but he didn’t let go of you, “Wha-how-?”

You gave him an incredulous, but still fond, look, and pressed another kiss to his lips. This time it was soft, like the petals of the roses he grew outside his apartment block, or the last rays of sunlight over the hill on that first night. It was a promise of something, of acceptance.

“You’re not subtle, my love. My drinks go from lukewarm to piping hot. Marble’s hair untangles itself. Untied shoelaces get done up, you ‘fixed’ a horrendously shattered vase at Christmas.” you explained.

Regulus felt himself go red, “I thought you wouldn’t notice.”

You took his hand and threaded your fingers together, continuing on your walk like nothing had happened.

“We didn’t notice the magic for a while,” you admitted, “but, come on. How were we going to miss the literal dark mark on your arm, hm? Weird tattoo for a guy who never read the books to get, don’t you think?”

“WAIT THE DARK MARK IS IN THE BOOKS?”

#jordsie #jordsie writes #Harry Potter #harry potter fandom #harry potter fanfiction #wizarding world #wizarding world fanfiction #Marauders #marauder #marauders era #modern au #marauders fanfiction #marauders imagine #regulus black #regulus black x you #regulus x you #regulus x y/n #regulus headcanon #regulus fanfiction #regulus imagine #regulus black x reader #regulus black x y/n #regulus black fanfiction #regulus black imagine

[hp-moods]

Hey! You're back, that's so wonderful! I loved the moodboards you did ages ago for me (Fleur x Bill) thank you so much! When you get the chance can you maybe do a Gryffindor/Wampus one? If you haven't already that is

I know you sent this ages ago, so I’m so sorry that it’s taken me such a long time to get to it. But I’m working on this now and I’ll have it posted later this week! Thank you for your patience and I hope you’ll like this one too!

#request #jordsie

[myriadimagines]

Tease

Deadly Class One Shot

Pairing: Reader x Lex Miller

Other Characters: Petra Yolga, Billy Bennet, Marcus Lopez Arguello

Warnings: smoking, swearing, alcohol consumption

Request: @jordsie​ — “My oneshot idea was for a Lex Miller x reader piece where him and the reader have had a bit of a friends with benefits thing going for a while but, when she admits to having real feelings, he freaks out and calls everything off even though he does have some of those feelings himself. Mutual angst ensues, and then eventually (maybe after someone else tries with Y/N?) they get together.”

Word Count: 2,367

A/N: i miss deadly class hgnhgnghnggggg which i say like at least once a day. anyway, thank you so so much to @jordsie for donating to Reclaim The Block, you’re amazing! if you would like to request a one shot of your own, please read this post!

please reblog/leave comments, they’re very much appreciated!

Your name: submit What is this?

“And now the party’s officially started!”

You let out a loud groan as Petra rolls her eyes beside you, and the two of you look over your shoulders as you see Lex burst through the door to the rooftop, arms thrown up in the air as Billy and Marcus trail behind him, shaking their heads with teasing smiles on their faces. Lex jokingly wrinkles his nose as his eyes land on you, and Lex asks, “What are you boring lot doing up ’ere?”

“Trying to mentally hype ourselves up to go to Shabnam’s party.” Petra responds through a puff of smoke, and she passes her cigarette to you as you watch Billy sidle up to Petra. He eagerly nods along to what she’s saying as she continues, “I don’t understand why you idiots want to go. Shabnam’s nothing but a try hard.”

“Yeah, ugh, Shabnam.” Billy pulls a face, trying his best to impress Petra. “We hate him. Right?”

You and Marcus can’t help but exchange a knowing glance, and Marcus chuckles as the both of you know that Billy’s crush on Petra is more evident than ever as Petra shoots him a confused look. Shrugging, Marcus gives you a little nudge as he responds, “Whatever. A party’s a party. It’s about time we blow off some steam.”

“And I take it you’re going to be there?” you turn to look at Lex, putting on a nonchalant tone as you raise an eyebrow at him. Lex’s goofy grin creates a smile on your own face, and you try your best to keep a straight face as Lex slings an arm around your shoulders, giving you a little shake.

“Well, of course! I’m not one to miss a party.” Lex responds, pulling you close to him despite your attempts to shove him away. He laughs, and teases, “Come on, don’t be like that, love. I know you want me at that party.” 

You pointedly roll your eyes, finally managing to shove his body off yours as you tell him, “Fuck off.” 

Lex throws his head back in laughter, and you duck your head, hoping you don’t look as flustered as you feel. You avoid Petra’s suspicious gaze that falls upon you as you hand the cigarette back to her, and you divert your attention to the view from the rooftop. None of your friends are aware of the little arrangement you have with Lex, secretly hooking up in the dead of the night, dragging each other into empty classrooms for desperate kisses. You know you’ve come close to getting caught, but perhaps that’s what you love most about it. The adrenaline and the rush of sneaking around week after week.

But that’s not the only thing you love. You may or may not have feelings for Lex himself, too.

“We gonna get a move on or what?” Lex asks, jostling Petra as she drops her cigarette, putting it out from under her boot. “Come on, lads, let’s go!”

Lex spins on his heel, leading the way as he makes his way off the roof, and you bite back a smile before reaching for Petra’s arm, tugging her along with you as you all make your way to the party. 

—

You flop against the couch, taking a sip from your cup as you watch the party unfold before you. There’s a mix of everyone from King’s, Rats and Legacies alike, and you flip off a member of the Dixie Mob as you notice one of them scowling at you. Scoffing into her drink beside you, Petra shakes her head as she mutters under her breath, “Remind me why we’re here again?”

You open your mouth to respond, when you suddenly notice Lex in the corner of the room, lingering in the doorway as your eyes meet. He raises an eyebrow at you, a signal you’ve become all too familiar with, and he nods his head down the hallway of Shabnam’s house before he disappears. You gulp down the rest of your drink, straightening your top as you abruptly get up, and Petra looks up at you with wide eyes as she protests, “Where the hell are you going?”

“Come on, you’re a big girl, you can survive without me for a bit.” you tease, avoiding her question as you notice Billy walking over. Perking up, you beckon for him to come over as you continue, “Here, Billy will keep you company.” 

Before Petra can protest, you’ve already darted away, leaving her with Billy as you weave your way through your drunken classmates. You duck into the hallway, tucking your hair behind your ears as you open the first door you come across. You quickly slam the door shut as you see a group of Kuroki Syndicate kids inside, who glare at you as you interrupt whatever discussion they’re having, and you shake your head as you head to the next room.

You peer inside, yelping as you feel a hand reach out to grab yours, and Lex shuts the door behind you before quickly pushing you up against the wall, crashing his lips against yours as you immediately kiss him back. You push his leather jacket off his shoulders as he quickly shrugs it off, and he mumbles, “Kept me waiting long enough, didn’t you, love?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” you feign innocence, pulling away from him so you can smile at him, and Lex chuckles as he shakes his head.

“You’re such a tease,” he replies, before leaning forward to kiss you again, his hands roaming up your body as you stifle a gasp. You can taste the alcohol on his lips, which soon trail away from yours, and he presses kisses to your cheek, your jaw, and down your neck, and you tilt your head up as you run your fingers through his spiked hair. 

“Fuck,” you breath out, and you swear you can feel Lex smirking against your skin as his hands pull your hips closer to his body. “I love you.”

The words slip past your tongue so fast you don’t even have time to think about stopping them. For a moment, time seems to stand still, and you feel Lex stiffen as he slowly pulls away, eyebrows furrowing as he asks, “What?”

You gulp, eyes wide as you feel your heart hammering in your chest. “I—”

“Shit.” Lex jerks back away from you, as if your skin is burning against his, and he fumbles to pick his jacket off the ground. “You… you don’t mean that, right?”

You open your mouth, yet no words come out. You can’t even deny it, can’t even pretend for his  sake that you’re not in love with him, but you can’t take back the words now. You can’t deny your feelings any longer. You only wish you had been confronted with a different reaction.

“I do.” you finally blurt, and Lex’s face falls. “I…  fuck, I do mean it! I… I love you.”

“No, no,” Lex paces through the room, his thoughts jumbling together as he doesn’t even know how to process everything. “This was supposed to be casual, yeah? Why’d you have to go and fuck it up?” 

Your breaths become shallow as your vision becomes blurry with tears. Weakly, you try to reason with him, “Lex…”

“I’m leaving.” Lex abruptly interrupts you, pushing past you, and you try to lunge after him.

“Lex, wait!” you desperately try to reach out to grab him, but he slips past your fingers, rushing out the door as you defeatedly watch him run off, not having the energy within you to run after him. Covering your face in your hands, you spin around, falling against the bed inside the room. Tears prickle your eyes as regret and embarrassment washes over you, and you reach for one of the pillows. Burying your face into it, you let out a frustrated scream.

—

Lex drags his feet through the hallway, head hung low as he shuffles back to his room. It’s been weeks since Shabnam’s party, weeks since you confessed to being in love with him, and he’s managed to avoid you since. Despite your overlapping friend groups, he’s managed to pointedly never be left alone with you, no matter how hard you try to talk to him. Figuring that cutting you out of his life completely is the only way to solve the issue, Lex is doing just that. 

But the more he thinks about it, the more he realises he doesn’t even know what the issue is. Is that fact that you’re in love with him really a problem? Does he feel the same way about you, despite the fact the two of you initially agreed everything would be casual between the both of you? The questions swarm Lex’s mind to the point where he can barely think straight, and he shakes his head, as if trying to shake the questions out of his head. 

He looks up momentarily as he turns the corner, and his eyes go wide as he sees you further down the hallway, shoving books into your locker. He freezes on the spot, and he flinches as you look up and spot him. You blink in shock, but just as you open your mouth to call his name, Lex quickly sprints away, disappearing back where he came from before you can stop him. Your shoulders slump, and you gulp as you slam your locker shut, feeling humiliated and rejected as you try to hold back tears. 

“Hey, y/n.” a voice greets you, and you look up to see Marcus approaching you before he leans up against the lockers. He holds up a pack of cigarettes which he digs out from his blazer pocket, and he asks, “Want a smoke?”

You let out a sigh. Perhaps this’ll help you keep your mind off Lex. Nodding at Marcus, you respond, “Let’s go.”

—

You dump your bag on the floor as you and Marcus sit down on the rooftop, soaking in the orange glow of the sunset. You lean forward as Marcus offers you a lighter, and you can feel his eyes on you as he lights your cigarette up for you. You lean away, watching as Marcus lights up his own cigarette, and after a moment of silence, he asks, “So, you and Lex, huh?”

You tense up, and Marcus stifles a laugh at your reaction. “Come on. It was obvious.”

“Whatever.” you roll your eyes. “It’s over, anyway. Whatever it is that we had.”

The words sting you, but you try to ignore the pain, pretending that your heart isn’t splitting inside your chest. Marcus awkwardly rubs the back of his neck, and he quietly responds, “Yeah, I kind of figured.”

“He’s such an asshole.” you suddenly blurt, anger bubbling in your chest. “He doesn’t even have the decency to talk to me.” 

Marcus shrugs. “You deserve better.”

It’s only then do you notice how close Marcus is sitting beside you, and you suck in a sharp breath as you slowly look up at him. He’s already looking at you, studying your expression, and your voice barely comes out as a whisper as you say, “Marcus…” 

Maybe this isn’t so bad, you try to reason with yourself. Marcus is one of your friends, and maybe this’ll be a good distraction to get Lex off your mind. Marcus leans closer to you, his gaze momentarily falling to your lips before back up to your eyes, and you feel frozen in place before the sound of the rooftop door opening jolts the two of you apart. You both look up, alarmed, as you see Lex standing in the doorway, and you can’t quite decipher the look of hurt and betrayal that mixes in his expression as he sees you and Marcus. Jealousy swirls in his chest, as Lex wants nothing more than you to himself, and he can’t help but feel slightly crazy seeing you with someone else.

“Oi, Marcus. Fuck off, will ya?” Lex finally speaks, and Marcus’ eyebrows furrow as he opens his mouth to protest. He turns to look at you, shrug at him apologetically, and Marcus rolls his eyes as he collects his belongings and walks off, making a point of shoving past Lex’s shoulder as he does so. Lex approaches you, and you defensively fold your arms as you turn to look away, and Lex says, “Aw, come on, y/n.”

“Fuck you, Lex,” you spit, turning to glare at him. “You don’t talk to me for weeks, and now you’re just going to show up and interrupt me while I’m hanging out with other people?”

“Looked like a bit more than a hangout.” Lex points out, raising an eyebrow at you. “Didn’t know Marcus had a thing for you.”

“Well, it’s none of your business, first of all,” you scowl. “And secondly, why do you care? Since you’ve made it pretty clear you want nothing to do with me.”

“It’s not like that.” Lex tries to defend himself, and you let out a loud scoff.

“Are you serious?” you splutter. “I was the one who fucked everything up according to you, remember? Right before you stormed out an—”

Before you can continue, Lex suddenly grabs your face in his hands, kissing you. Despite how badly you want to push him away, you immediately melt into his touch, his touch you’ve been craving ever since the night of the party. You hate how quickly you soften into him, but as he pulls away, you feel as if all the air has been knocked out of you.

“I’m the one who fucked things up, alright?” Lex admits. “I love you too, okay? I was a bloody idiot not to realise it earlier, but I do love you, and I want you.”

You blink, in shock at his words. “Don’t be a tease. Do you really mean all that?”

“Yes.” Lex reaffirms, cupping your face in his hands. “I mean it, y/n.”

Your lips quirk into a smile, and you lean forward to kiss him again. And this time, it’s no longer desperate, but soft, and tender, and loving. 

tag list: @mockingjaygirl1221​ / @cnco-babes​ / @asix122747483​ / @lotsoffandomimagines​ / @uhohscarlett​ / @bored-green​ / @ietss​

#reader x lex miller #lex miller x reader #lex miller imagine #deadly class imagine #deadly class #deadly class one shot #lex miller #lex miller one shot #imagine #imagines #reader insert #one shot #oneshot

[uhohscarlett]

Tag nine people you want to know better / catch up with

tagged by: @jordsie

last song: lovers rock - tv girl

last movie: natural born killers

currently watching: criminal minds teehee

currently reading: war and peace (but the original russian text)

currently craving: attention lmfaoo

bold of u to assume i know nine ppl on here! so im tagging @odd-blue

[romeulusroy]

Secretly Making Out With Lex As A Legacy Would Include:

Requested: @jordsie​

As a Legacy, you learn who will make or break your reputation

Stay with your clique and you're safe from ridicule and shunning

Stray away, and you're leaving behind the safety of a group, a pack, something that was key to surviving in a place like this

You couldn't tell anyone about your feelings

Even if they promised to keep it secret, word would always get around, it would always spread through the school faster than a fire

Of course, of all the boys in the school, you had to fall for Lex

If word got out, it would make you a social pariah among your "friends"

They never were open minded, especially with it came to the Rats

To them, they were simply people to step on, like bugs

Critters that were nothing more than a hassle, a nuisance

Still, in a way, you're oddly attracted to him

The spiky hair, the spikes on his jacket, the cute accent, even the way he says whatever is on his mind regardless of the audience or situation

You realize he's the only one that can make you truly laugh, too

Even all his rants and big speeches are adorable

Sometimes he was hard to understand, his behavior so erratic, so crazy from your own, but it just made him more interesting, more enticing

Your groups were divided a lot of them time, never able to get close enough to him to even talk in class or in the halls

Shabnams party is your big chance

There were so many people, you could easily slip away from watchful eyes to spend time with him

You find him on the couch, ranting as always, bringing a goofy smile to your face

When you sit down, the others use it as a way to escape

You're more than glad to listen

He's a little tipsy, but so are you, giving you the courage to kiss him

Still paranoid the other Legacies can see you, you ask him if you can go upstairs, for a little more privacy

He laughs a lot in the middle of your kiss, and you can't help but giggle

It's better than you ever expected, even if your head is a little fuzzy

There had been dumb childhood kisses, but nothing like this

He's a little handsy, but luckily you locked the door so no one could drunkenly barge in

You make Lex promise not to tell anyone

He laughs it off at first, already planning how he'll announce it to his friends, but when he sees how serious you are, he promises

And you believe him

Leaving the room separately, just in case anyone sees you

After the party, anytime you look at him you feel akward

Lex thinks it's cute, how shy you get

You always catch him looking you up an down in class or the lunch room

You thought it was just one time, but the more you think about him, that night, the more you give up trying to deny your feelings

Any chance you get, you try to meet in secret

On the roof, in his room, anywhere you can get the slightest bit of privacy

Lex thinks it's funny how nervous you get, but he couldn't care less

Sure, he'd get picked on from his friends, but it would be in a loving, joking way, it wouldn't be the reaction your friends have

"What are you so nervous about?"

"It's just, it's complicated."

You wish it wasn't like this, that you could be whoever you wanted, but doing that put most of the powerful kids on Earth against you

You were willing to do anything if it meant you and Lex were safe

Because it's not just you you're putting at risk

Accidentally almost getting caught in his room half a dozen times

By now, you have it as part of the routine

"If you don't wanna get caught, maybe you should be less forgetful."

"If your roommate learned to knock, I wouldn't leave things behind."

"Why? It's cute watching you sneak away."

That earns him an eye roll

Sometime he just laughs, making kissing noises when he passes you in the halls just loud enough for you to hear

"Do you wanna get caught?"

"Aw come on, you look so cute when you're mad!"

"Not funny, Lex."

All your friends asking if you like someone

Having to deny any kind of crush every time

It's just supposed to be mindless teenage fun

A little reckless, a little stupid, completely impulsive

Somewhere along the line you want to be more than what you are, developing more feelings than you bargained for

All that time you spend together,the hiding, the running, the secrets just between you two, you get to know him better than you ever expected

After a while, you realize you don't wanna sneak around anymore

You want to go on a date with him, a real one, and hold his hand, and do all that dumb relationship stuff your friends do with their partners

If making out was gonna get you in trouble, dating would get you killed

#i hope you like it!!! #requested #headcanon #lex miller #lex miller headcanon #deadly class #deadly class headcanon

[just-french-me-up]

Girl, the song Believer by Imagine Dragon gives me such Enjoltaire vibes, I'm dying!!

I think someone already pointed out the connection to me before but!!

I always get very vivid visuals when I listen to music I like, and the vibes I get for this is:

Grantaire at a nightclub. It’s not particularly a good night. Everything is in slow motion. From the corner of his eye, he can see Courfeyrac and Combeferre dancing together, so close it’s almost indecent. A couple of heartbeats away, Jehan is leaning against Montparnasse, their back against his chest. The two of them move like one, Parnasse’s hand resting in Jehan’s stomach.

And then there’s Enjolras.

His hair takes on the colours of the stroposcopic lights. Shadows constantly shift places on his features, drawing a thousand faces, each one more painfully sublime than the last. Grantaire’s heart pounds louder than the beat hammering in his ears.

Will he ever hold them like that? Will he ever feel the warmth of Enjolras against him? What would it take to walk the few steps separating them and ask him for a dance? Everything. It would take everything he has, and Grantaire isn’t sure he’s ready to gamble what he has left.

Grantaire needs some fresh air.

#answered #enjolras #grantaire #enjoltaire #combeferre #courfeyrac #courferre #jehan #montparnasse #jehanparnasse #jordsie