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jencsi · 2 months

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1-25 for Finn because you deserve to gush about your favourite. Take as long as you want, or if you don't wanna do all of them then just answer the ones you want to.

*Disclaimer*- I had an absolute blast doing this and yes I know I could have written about all of these without waiting for someone else to ask, but it's much more fun and motivating when someone else thinks of you. :) So thank you. This is a long one. But so worth it.

1. Why do you like or dislike this character?- I like Finn because she reminds me of myself in some ways but in other ways she is the person I wish I could be/the friend I wish I had. She tries to be the best version of herself everyday, even when she might fail. She pushes through even when things do fail because what can you do? She is stronger than me, tougher than me, smarter than me, things I wish I was. She forces herself into the world and makes people pay attention to her but I feel like I am always picked last or not picked at all. She emulates so many qualities that get her into trouble but somehow it all works out for the best. I give up much too easily on things when they don’t go my way. She knows she deserves to be respected and treated where often times I just take BS from people and let it consume me instead of fighting for what I want. She forces others to deal with her instead of being silent. She makes sure she is heard. She also was a good friend to Sara and Morgan and helped Sara grow as a person and be separate from Grissom because Sara is a separate person who deserves happiness even if it wasn’t with him and Finn sort of showed her that its okay to want love but want what you deserve and not wait around for someone else to make the decision. I dislike her because sometimes there were moments where she probably shouldn’t have kept pushing and maybe held her tongue and just let things go but she didn’t and it's more of a second hand embarrassment feeling when she pushes to far but that’s really the only dislike I have for her.

2. Favorite canon thing about this character?- Desk sitting. Getting into trouble. Getting Russell angry with her only to have him actually care deeply for her. The Jules nickname she hates allegedly but lets him call her that anyways. Sports. Violence. Blood spatter. Having multiple love interests in just a few short seasons.

3. Least favorite canon thing about this character?- um dying? Lol yeah we know what the OG script said but the final nail in the coffin literally and metaphorically is that she died.

4. If you could put this character in any other media, be it a book, a movie, anything, what would you put them in?- I think it would be neat to see Finn in a Harry Potter type setting. Mostly because I grew up reading those books and low key she’d make an excellent Ravenclaw or Slytherin. I would also like to see her in the Kinsey Millhone series which was written by Sue Grafton and was a private detective novel series featuring titles like A is for Alibi, B is for Burglar, etc. Kinsey was a great character and since the author died, she made it a legality so none of her work can be made into movies or series but it would be cool to see Finn in that world and the world of Temperance Brennan (book version) by Kathy Reichs.

5. What's the first song that comes to mind when you think about them?- Brighter Than The Sun by Colbie Caillat because I heard this song on the radio shortly after Finn’s first episode aired and then the team baseball episode aired and I felt that she just radiated during those scenes and it just stuck. I have an entire Finn playlist but this one is the first one I had on there in 2012.

6. What's something you have in common with this character?- we are both underdogs. CC- Under A Cloud. Finn was not everyone's favorite in the fan group and I understand that and relate to that personally. I’m never a first choice, I’m always left out of so many things, and I have very few positive life experiences because of this. The show didn’t really project these feelings about her onto me, but it was negative fandom experience over the course of 2012-2015. The experiences I have now with fandom are much better but those early moments will always resonate with me. So much unnecessary hate and disregard for no reason.

7. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you like?- Seeing as I am always shocked to find a fan who likes her, I guess the simplicity of someone saying “Hey Finn is/was cool” is something I like from the fandom.

8. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you despise?- *see number 6* Also, on a deeper level, hating Finn because she seemed too much like Catherine or came to replace her is odd when society is always screaming about how we should be lifting women up, putting them all on the same level, not pitting them against each other. You can’t share a quote to me about women supporting women then go and slander one female character just because she took a job opening that someone else just vacated. If we did that in real life, we wouldn’t have jobs. Things like that happen so much in workplace settings. Catherine wanted out. Finn wanted in. It’s a simple thing but got blown way out of proportion by some in the fandom.

9. Could you be roommates with this character?- unfortunately no. I am too rigid in my routine and organizing and Finn is pure chaos. She's loud. I’m quiet. I’m up early, she's a late sleeper. Just polar opposites.

10. Could you be best friends with this character?- probably. I would love to have someone like this in my life, someone fun and bright and bubbly who would not forget about me or leave me out of group activities or forget I exist.

11. Would you date this character?- Yes! She’s fun and silly and full of zest for life and has such a big heart and clearly wants to love and be loved. I would adore this in real life.

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?- that she didn’t die. Along with so many others- she originally wanted to be a doctor like her father, she's an only child, her first husband was a cop who was killed on the job and that spiraled her into pursuing police work, he was killed the same night he proposed to her so therefore she wasn’t officially married but she refers to him as a first husband, his case was never solved. She was adopted and raised by her uncle (biological moms brother) and aunt but doesn’t discover it until the Gig Harbor Killer reveals it. She always felt a stronger bond with her father growing up vs her mother and now this all makes sense to her but she never felt unloved. Both her adoptive family have passed on and she has to dig for clues and piece together her life. Her biological mother finds her and has been keeping tabs on her for 50 years but was terrified to reveal the secret since she was only 16 when she gave birth to her and why she gave Finn to her brother and his wife when she was a baby, they could raise her in a more stable environment.

13. What's an emoji, an emoticon and/or any symbol that reminds you of this character or you think the character would use a lot?- heart eyes, hearts in general, the sun, sunflowers, stars, anything bright and flashy remind me of her. Things she would use alot- the silly face emojis, winking face ones, the sports ones.

14. Assign a fashion aesthetic to this character.- I would say she is casual when she’s not working, jeans, t-shirts, hoodies, athletic wear. At work, business casual I suppose, she always had leather jackets and sleeveless shirts/blouses. Wish they would have had more opportunities for her to dress up and do undercover assignments and explore being different that way as well.

15. What's your favorite ship for this character? (Doesn't matter if it's canon or not.)- Finn and Nick send me into another dimension. They both understood the job well, both could relate to each others pains, could fully support each other in a difficult time. I feel like Finn and her lightness would lift Nick out of his darkness (not that people are supposed to save each other in a relationship) but more of helping him be the best version of himself that he could be, not weighed down by his past, he could see her as a light at the end of the tunnel. He could help her relax a bit more and not be so wound up about cases and injustices. Not that she needed to be reeled in but he would give her a reason to stop and think of the consequences of her reckless actions if she had a reason to care about not getting hurt, maybe she would stop.

16. What's your least favorite ship for this character?- I honestly can’t think of any. Finn gets along with everyone. She bonded well with Greg and had a good time teasing and poking fun at Hodges.

17. What's a ship for this character you don't hate but it's not your favorite that you're fine with?- I guess Finn with all the random suitors they gave her. Like her Seattle ex Mike, I don’t hate it, but we knew it wasn’t going to be more than one episode's worth of backstory for her and him. Her thing with Shaw wasn’t great either seeing as he led to her death as well as his own but lowkey at least she had some romance before her demise. Moreno wasn’t awful but his partner was a dirty cop who beat the crap out of her in Karma To Burn so that would make things awkward. Finn is shippable with pretty much everyone.

18. How about a relationship they have in canon with another character that you admire?- The dynamic she has with Russell is beautiful. Not even being over dramatic either, what they have is poetic, magic, understanding on a level so deep, respect, care, admiration, chaos. Something so profound and resonating that I can’t even describe it properly but also could write an entire essay on it just screaming about it. Is it love? Is it platonic friendship? Codependency? Mutual? None of these things and yet all of these things at the same time? Spiritual, soulful, stellar, when her lifeforce is drained so is his, when she hurts, he hurts, it's just so *chefs kiss* magnificent.

19. How about a relationship they have in canon that you don't like?- Nothing that I can think of honestly. Finn didn’t get much of a chance to develop as a character before the show ended. She pretty much vibes well with everyone.

20. Which other character is the ideal best friend for this character, the amount of screentime they share doesn't matter?- Finn seemed to have alot in common with Henry during season 12, teaching him baseball for the game, talking about fantasy novels, but she also connected well with Morgan and Sara. I think out of all of them, she needed a good girl best friend like Morgan. Morgan seemed more down with the fun and chaos Finn caused and they could laugh and be silly and make jokes and just hang out like normal friends and drink and sing karaoke and just go crazy.

21. If you're a fic writer and have written for this character, what's your favorite thing to do when you're writing for this character? What's something you don't like?- my favorite thing to do for fics for Finn is let her be loved. Soft affections and comforts and just giving her as much love as I can pour into a fic is my main goal. I do like getting her into trouble and the subsequent “talking to” she gets from Russell. I can’t think of anything I don’t like in writing for her besides not having ideas, going through a dry spell of having zero ideas for her, that’s torture.

22. If you're a fic reader, what's something you like in fics when it comes to this character? Something you don't like?- I love when people post fics about Finn because they are hard to find in the fandom. I don’t think I have read a Finn fic by another author that I didn’t like. Anyone who makes an effort to expand on a character in a creative setting is top tier, there are no bad fics in my mind. 23. Favorite picture of this character?- Oh man, just one? This is tough. Quite literally any screen shot from her first episode will do.

24. What other character from another fandom of yours that reminds you of them?- Ellie Bishop from NCIS sat on desks for a while and had a very spunky personality. Chris Connor from Becker (also stars Ted Danson) had a similar positive optimistic attitude as Finn (plus curls for days) and her scenes with Becker remind me so much of Russell and Finn but in a late 90’s-early 2000’s comedy setting, it's hilarious if anyone stumbles upon it.

25. What was your first impression of this character? How about now?- First impression was shock because I was going into the rest of season 12 knowing Catherines loss would be prevalent and I wasn’t sure what Finn would be like. First episode with Finn had me hooked. The energy she brought, the playful banter, the anger issues, the back story with Russell, just all of it grabbed me and sucked me in and I felt this strong emotional pull to her after Seeing Red. She even walked with a spring in her step and there was something about that little quirk in just one episode that drew me in to wanting to see more and know more. And as a byproduct of that, I absolutely adore Elisabeth Shue. She made Finn so real and brought so many layers to her. Everything I’ve said about Finn in these 25 questions come from Elisabeth bringing her to life. I would have none of that if anyone else had been cast to be part of the show at that exact moment. Like how lucky did I get? Thank goodness she said yes to it or the casting people picked her or however the process went down. I can’t imagine anyone else as Julie Finlay. I will always carry this character with me (as I have since 2012) as like a little sidekick, a little voice that tells me I can do something, I’ll make it, I’ll keep going for some crazy unknown reason. Finn was Russell’s voice inside his head that guided him that he became dependent on overtime and she’s mine too.

26. FREEBIE QUESTION!!- What hopes did you have for this character?- Back in 2015 when Finn’s fate was left in limbo, of course I was hopeful for her survival. As time went on and the show was officially canceled, I was still left in limbo wondering how they would handle the coma. Then they announced a 2 hour movie, okay no big deal. Then it was announced that Elisabeth wouldn’t be joining that finale movie and I was devastated. Looking back on that time, I think I gained a better understanding as to why. The obvious answer would be, she was busy and couldn’t fulfill the time needed to film any potential Finn scenes. Or the decision to kill Finn was made and she didn’t want to be part of that so she dipped out, fair enough. But I hoped with all my heart and soul that her character would survive and not be tossed aside and forgotten like garbage. Oh it’s just Finn, who cares as long as we get Grissom and Sara and Catherine etc. The disregard hurt as a long time fan of the show, I was torn between being excited for certain things but gutted because, no Finn. Overall I just hoped for respect for her, dignity, a decent conclusion to her story because it mattered too. And once again I found myself feeling as if I didn’t matter because if Finn didn’t matter, then how could I ever expect anyone to think I mattered? That sinking underdog kicked in the gut feeling was too visceral and I don’t think I will ever accept what we got in the end for Finn. She deserved the love she gave, it was greater than most realized.

#thank you so much for asking this #this made my day #Julie finlay #long post #ask games #csi cbs #csi crime scene investigation

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woodworkingpastor · 1 year

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Tempt -- Matthew 4:1-11 -- First Sunday of Lent, 2023

In preparing my sermon for this morning I noted that I preached this same text last year on the First Sunday of Lent—51 Sundays ago, as it turns out. What encourages me is that after I had again gone through my preparation, I found I had arrived at the same conclusions this year that I did last year: namely, that this passage is not talking about the particular temptations to sin that we face but is asking us if we are prepared to trust God.

Temptations are matters of great significance about which various New Testament writers have important things today. We live in a time where so many addictive things are encouraged openly even as we observe the rising damage done to our physical, mental, and relational health. One need look no farther than the sudden availability of sports gambling, with the ever-present advice on how to find help for gambling addiction, or the mounting evidence of how damaging social media is to our youth (especially our pre-teen and teenage girls) to understand how dangerous this boundary-less path is that we are on.

But this does not change the fact that this is not a text about these types of temptations. The bridge that connects our life experience to the text is that those things that tempt us—in whatever form they come—reveal our commitment to our fundamental identity.

Our identity is tested in the wilderness. Matthew tells us that:

Jesus was led up by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil. He fasted forty days and forty nights, and afterwards he was famished (Matthew 4:1-2).

The desert is one of the more demanding places on earth in which to live. The “desert” moments of our lives—be they literal or (more likely) metaphorical—are the circumstances we face when are at the end of ourselves and are forced to deal with our ultimate limits. If it came right down to it, what would we do to survive? To protect our reputation? To feed our family? To satisfy our lusts or our insecurities?

The identity that we are tempted to betray is that of the church, the set-apart people of God.

This has always been a temptation for God’s people. The story of Jesus’ temptations is in many ways a redoing of the Exodus from Egypt. If you remember your Sunday School lessons, then you will recall the Hebrew people’s slavery in Egypt, and how God sent Moses to demand Pharoah let the people go. 10 plagues later, the people are set free, only to have Pharoah change his mind and pursue them to the banks of the Red Sea. God delivers the people from Pharoah’s army through the Red Sea and on to freedom.

Having been led through the Red Sea and into the desert as God’s chosen, set-apart people destined to be the ones through whom all peoples were reconciled to God, the people immediately face temptation. Would there be enough to eat? Would there be enough to drink? Who will take care of us?

So too, Jesus has emerged through the waters—this time the waters of baptism—having heard from heaven:

This is my Son, the Beloved, with whom I am well pleased (Matthew 3:17).

And now each of us, having emerged from our own waters of baptism, are called to be that set-apart people in our generation; to “Continue the Work of Jesus” as we Brethren like to say.

The call is challenging, because we, too, have to face the difficulties. Will we reject the temptation to tribalism that is rooted deeply within each of us and fanned into a furious fire by the culture wars of our day? Will we live with an open hand extended toward our neighbor with the hope that the possibility of peace and relationship will be more valued more than fear and exclusion. Will we trust that our future will be well, regardless of the latest swing of the stock market? Will the future of our church be strong, even as we note a rising cultural disinterest in the hope of the Gospel?

The Christian season of Lent is an opportunity for spiritual renewal, of walking with Jesus toward the cross. It is a journey that begins in the desert, where we can confront those things that threaten our identity and find healing in the presence of Jesus.

Confronting the tempter

The temptations to turn stones to bread and to jump from the pinnacle of the Temple speak to Jesus’ credibility as the Son of God. “If…” is a terribly accusatory way of asking someone something, because when the question is put to us in that form, the intent is to cast doubt or throw shade. “If” is not so much a question as it is a manipulation of the person to whom it is directed. And even though questions formed in this fashion really say more about the one asking the question than the one to whom they are asked, the temptation to betray our commitments so that we may be proven in the eyes of another is real. How many times have we heard (or asked!) questions that began with if? “If you really loved me…” “If you really cared…”

The temptations the devil hurls at Jesus aren’t intended to question Jesus’ identity; they question Jesus’ allegiance. Will Jesus be a servant who comes to reconcile the last, little, lost, and least, or will Jesus be just one more carnival act that dazzles willing audiences with amazing feats of skill? Will Jesus be a Savior or a showman? Will Jesus introduce people to life in the Kingdom of God, or will he be a hawker of religious goods and spiritual trinkets?

The third temptation is of a different sort, as it reveals that Kingdom work is done on contested ground. We should not overlook the tempter’s statement, “All these I will give…”. They were his to offer because of sin. All things may have been created, “in, through, and for Jesus” (as Paul writes in Colossians 1), but Jesus does not currently have home-field advantage.

Jesus answers each of the tempter’s snares by appealing to Scripture. No tricks, no clever turn of a phrase, just a deep understanding that whatever and whenever temptations come our way, God has been revealed to us both in Scripture and in the person of Jesus. We need appeal nowhere else but to the core of Scripture to find our purpose and our value.

Remaining faithful in the desert

Desert experiences strip us bare and force us to confront our unvarnished selves. They are not inherently bad, for, in the words of theologian Stanley Hauerwas, they teach us that:

the devil is but another name for our impatience. We want bread, we want to force God’s hand to rescue us, we want peace—and we want all this now. But Jesus is our bread, he is our salvation, he is our peace. That he is so requires that we learn to wait with him in a world of hunger, idolatry, and war to witness the kingdom that is God’s presence. The Father will have the kingdom present one small act at a time (Matthew, 55).

We see what happens when, in our desert moments, we succumb to impatience and attempt to take matters into our own hands—people get hurt. Over recent months I’ve been following the cover-up of sexual misconduct and abuse by leaders in the Southern Baptist Convention; church leaders (all men) who had documented evidence of wrongdoing by a number of pastors decided that their attempt to preserve the public reputation of the church was more important than protecting abused women in their churches, and so they dismissed the women who bravely told their stories of abuse until the accumulated weight of the stories was too big to continue hiding.

Similarly, each day our communities deal with gun violence that is enabled by allowing virtually unrestricted access to guns, knowing that many of those guns will be purchased legally then handed off illegally to those bent on violence. It’s yet another case where many want something dangerous to be unrestricted and yet want to refuse to connect the dots to the damage done.

Lent is an opportunity to strip away the extraneous aspects of our faith, to leave behind all the ways we are tempted to say, “Jesus and…”. It is an opportunity to cut through all of the “isms” of our day, to reject the opportunities we have to take what we know of Jesus and add to him all the trinkets and wares and ideas and philosophies that appeal to our senses. What we find when we examine these matters is that often what we want the most are really the accoutrements that we have added to make the real thing seem more appealing.

There is no ultimate allegiance of Jesus with worldly things or agencies or institutions. Jesus does not bear the sword. Jesus does not identify with a certain brand of politics. Jesus is not only about social justice. To quote Mennonite scholar Myron Augusburger,

I believe in justice; but I am not a preacher of a gospel of justice, but of the gospel of Christ who calls us to justice…I believe in peace; but I am not a preacher of the gospel of peace, but the gospel of Christ who calls us to peace…We must beware of the ultimate plagiarism, that of borrowing great concepts from Jesus…but not proclaiming the Christ who empowers those concepts…”

As walk with Jesus this Lenten season, the cover art on the bulletin suggests a stripping away of all that is not essential, removing what is unneeded so that what remains can be used for it’s intended purpose, so that we may learn that God is our provider, our protector, and our portion, who is bringing us through the wilderness and on to the Promised Land.

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quissum-ego · 3 years

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A Look At Whip It (2009) Through A Trans Lens

** A preliminary note: throughout this post, I will be referring to Bliss with he/they pronouns, both out of respect for Elliot Page, as well as the fact that it feels right for the character. You’ll see why. Thank you for understanding! (:

I rarely make my own posts on Tumblr, but this feels important enough to deviate from that streak a little bit, since I think this is something more people should be talking about. Now, as some of you may know, Whip It is a 2009 comedy-drama film directed by Drew Barrymore. The film is an adaptation of the 2007 novel Derby Girl (a.k.a Whip It) by Shauna Cross. Both the film and the novel follow the life of Bliss Cavendar, a Texas teen pursuing their newfound roller derby dream behind the backs of their parents. While I am by no means saying the novel or the film intended for Bliss to be trans, as a trans masc person myself, I cannot help but pick up on the similarities. Let’s dive right in with some quotes from Cross’ novel.

There are a couple instances throughout the text where Bliss expresses a dislike for his given name.

“ [ ... ] Bliss is not gonna cut it (I’ve been telling Brooke that for years.)”

Bliss’ struggle with his mother-given name and his complete awe at the fact that people (specifically the roller derby girls) so freely adapt an alternative name really hit home with me, personally. His feelings towards his birth name mirror the way myself and many of my trans friends feel, and these feelings were especially strong for me when I was around Bliss’ age. It is apparent that he has wanted a different name to better express himself for years, something that his mother looks down upon.

On a similar note, there are multiple instances where Bliss wonders who he really is, and how he can find and reclaim his own sense of self.

1. “I suddenly wonder what else I have in me that’s been stunted by too many years of pageant participation.”

Bliss would have little-to-no chance to explore how he wants to present himself when around his mother, but the world of roller derby slowly begins to open that door. Leading a double life that his parents don’t know about becomes his ticket to exploring aspects of himself that otherwise might have been pushed down.

2. “In an effort to shake off the pink-suit residue and reclaim my personal identity [...]”

Bliss resorts back to what he feels most comfortable in (graphic t-shirts) in an effort to “reclaim [his] personal identity”. Instead of the traditionally feminine ways that his mother has come to expect of him, Bliss finds comfort in his personal identity that is the exact opposite.

3. “Who are you [...]” “[...] I’ve been wondering that my entire life.”

Bliss struggles with his identity, and obviously has for as long as he can remember.

4. “You don’t even know me!”

“Bliss, you’re only sixteen. You don’t even know who you are.”

“I know I’m not Miss Bluebonnet [...] I know that much.”

Bliss emotionally retorts to the fact that he may not know who he is with the fact that he knows he is not a pageant girl. The identity he has found through roller derby triumphs over the Miss America cage Brooke has tried so hard to secure. He knows who he is, and she can no longer dictate that for him.

In the final two passages, Bliss’ parents begin to come around to the idea of him playing roller derby (an identity of his that feels like an ongoing metaphor for being LGBT).

“But you - you’re Babe Ruthless.”

“[...] she’s not only giving me my skates, but my freedom.”

In the end, Bliss’ mother accepts that he has come to be “Babe Ruthless”, and in giving him his skates to compete, she is giving him freedom. Brooke has finally accepted that Bliss may not be the person she believed him to be, but she wants him to be happy regardless.

“Not that Earl would ever say it, but I’ve always had a feeling he would have loved to have had a football-playing son. I think me playing Roller Derby might be the next best thing.”

Earl would have loved to have a sports-loving son, and Bliss sees his love for roller derby as the next best thing. He is, in his own way, the son Earl never knew he had.

The film adaptation of Whip It offers many great moments that carry this theme of roller derby being used as a metaphor for Bliss being trans.

After dying his hair blue before an important pageant in what feels like an act of defiance against his mother, Bliss is saddened to return home from the hair salon with it all washed out. When Earl notices the family coming home, he exclaims, “Dang it, girl, what has gotten into you?” to which Bliss replies with, “Just defective, I guess.”

Bliss feels defective in the world of beauty pageants because it is so opposing to who he is, and the life he wants to live. All he’s known thus far has been a complete 180 from himself, rendering him to feel out of place.

When Bliss first sees the derby league out in Austin, he is instantly enamored. His wish to live as freely as they do and express himself away from his mother is what drives him towards wanting to join the league.

After the game, Bliss expresses that the league are his new heroes. Maggie encourages him to be his own hero, to go out and live freely.

The film evolves into Bliss leading a double life. His parents believe he is studying with an SAT prep group, while in reality, he is training and playing with the roller derby league. One life where Bliss has to practice for pageants, study, and be who his mother wants him to be, and a second life where “Babe Ruthless” can follow his heart and be himself. The more Bliss embraces his inner Babe Ruthless, the more confident he becomes, both on the track as well as in school, as he finally begins standing up to bullies.

A key moment in the film comes when Bliss’ parents discover his roller derby promotional poster, and his secret double life becomes a lot less secret. The dialogue throughout the scene feels heavily trans-coded, particularly as Bliss cries out for his mother to “[...] stop shoving [her] psychotic idea of 50′s womanhood down [Bliss’] throat”. Bliss explains how he knows his parents wouldn’t have accepted the life where he feels he is truly himself, and the confrontation ends with them parting ways, and Bliss temporarily running away.

After reconciling with his parents and agreeing to participate in the pageant, Bliss initially believes his roller derby dreams to be a thing of the past. On the night of the pageant, however, Bliss’ father warms up to the idea, and seeks out Bliss’ teammates. They all arrive at the venue of the pageant to surprise Bliss.

When Brooke (naturally) disagrees with Earl’s change of heart, he expresses that he “[...] can not taking losing the chance for (our) kid to be happy.”

His parents make it to the game, and end up coming around to the fact that this is who Bliss is, and perhaps who he has always been. After the match, Bliss meets up with his mother to talk with her.

She comes to terms with the fact that she can’t change what Bliss is going to do in life, and he expresses that he needs to know she can accept him. She admits that it will be hard, but ultimately she will try, which is all that Bliss truly hoped for.

The film closes with Bliss’ mother reading his pageant speech and putting away the custom gown (perhaps accepting that this chapter of their lives has closed), Earl putting up a Babe Ruthless sign on the Cavendar’s front lawn in support of their kid, and Bliss sitting atop the Oink Joint, seemingly at peace with this newfound joy in his life. He has found himself, and found what he truly loves doing, and he now knows that he has people in his life who support him through and through.

All in all, while I am aware this is just one way to interpret the film, I wanted to share my thoughts because this has made his film truly special to me. If you haven’t already, give the film a watch. It is more than worth your time. I’d love to hear your thoughts, if you picked up on any of the same themes as me, or what you thought if this post ended up encouraging you to watch the film.

Thanks for sticking around and reading to the end. You’re the coolest. (~:

#Whip It #Elliot Page #Drew Barrymore #Bliss Cavendar #filmedit #lgbt #trans #transgender #film analysis

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tiriansjewel · 3 years

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find it here on Spotify!

lyric explanations below the cut! (click images for better quality)

1. The 1 by Taylor Swift

“But it would've been fun

If you would've been the one”

As we start the playlist, Luke and Alex are taking a wistful look back on their relationship in the 90s now that they’ve moved on to other people.

2. Coming Clean by Green Day

“Seventeen and strung out on confusion

Trapped inside a roll of disillusion

I found out what it takes to be a man

Now mom and dad will never understand”

Back in the 90s, both Luke and Alex are coming to terms with their sexualities.

3. Smells Like Teen Spirit

“With the lights out, it's less dangerous

Here we are now, entertain us”

Sunset Curve were working towards popularity right at the height of the grunge scene, and I would assume that both Luke and Alex heard quite a bit of this song as teenagers.

4. Now or Never by Sunset Curve

“Keep dreaming like we'll live forever

But live it like it's now or never”

How could I not include Sunset Curve’s own song? They like living in the moment, and that includes their love lives.

5. Everlong by the Foo Fighters

“And I wonder

If everything could ever feel this real forever

If anything could ever be this good again

The only thing I'll ever ask of you

You've got to promise not to stop when I say when”

When you go through adolescence, you crave intimacy with other people. This song exemplifies what Luke and Alex want from each other- to be able to feel, and to be able to experience those feelings on a deeper level.

6. Ocean Size by Jane’s Addiction

“Wish I was ocean size

They cannot move you, man

No one tries

No one pulls you

Out from your hole

Like a tooth aching a jawbone”

Jane’s Addiction was another LA rock band of this time period, and these lyrics about wanting to be powerful like the ocean and having to leave your home really remind me of Luke.

7. All Apologies by Nirvana

“What else should I be?

All apologies

What else should I say?

Everyone is gay”

This song is Kurt Cobain ironically apologizing for his cynical attitude, including the line “everyone is gay” to mock homophobes. It reminds me of Alex- he doesn’t want to be “married and buried”; he is rebelling against his parents’ definition of a correct lifestyle.

8. Freaking Out The Neighborhood by Max DeMarco

“And I know it's no fun

When your first son

Gets up to no good

Starts freaking out the neighborhood”

Emily Patterson and Alex’s mom were probably both pretty appalled by their sons effectively joining the counterculture. At this point, both Luke and Alex are starting to express themselves more, comfortable in who they are and what they want.

9. Hangout With You by Diners

“All I want

Is to talk with you now

And I know that you've got time

You are constantly on my mind

Yes I know that you've got time

To hang out with me

Tonight”

Luke has begun to realize that he likes Alex, and in true Luke fashion, can’t stop thinking about it.

10. Affection by Between Friends

“I'm laying on the floor

We're drinking 'cause we're bored

Oh, I'm looking for affection in all the wrong places

And we'll keep falling on each other to fill the empty spaces”

One night, it all comes out- their feelings and desires- and they decide to begin some kind of friends with benefits type of situation. This song feels like it’s from Luke’s perspective to me.

11. gold rush by Taylor Swift

“What must it be like

To grow up that beautiful?

With your hair falling into place like dominos

I see me padding 'cross your wooden floors

With my Eagles t-shirt hanging from the door

At dinner parties

I call you out on your contrarian shit

And the coastal town

We wandered 'round had never

Seen a love as pure as it

And then it fades into the gray of my day old tea

'Cause you know it could never be”

Luke is a magnetic person, attracting everyone, and Alex finds him beautiful. He is in awe of him, but he’s also scared about having feelings he doesn’t know how to handle. This song kind of shows Alex’s internal monologue.

12. Can We Kiss Forever? by Kina

“I tried to reach you, I can't hide

How strong's the feeling when we dive

I crossed the ocean of my mind

My wounds are healing with the salt

All my senses intensified

Whenever you and I, we dive”

This song describes their first kiss, obscured from the world, in my mind. Plus, there’s ocean metaphors. You can’t go wrong with that.

13. 18 by Anarbor

“So if you wanna piss off your parents

Date me to scare them

Show them you're all grown up

If long hair and tattoos are what attract you

Baby, then you're in luck

And I know it's just a phase

You're not in love with me

You wanna piss off your parents, baby

That's alright with me”

Luke knows Alex isn’t in love with him, but they both want to try new things. Bonus points for this song having references to frayed parent-child relationships.

14. Boys Will Be Boys by Miles McKenna

“That graduation day, it never came for you and me

Couple drop-out kids, a shotgun wedding's all we need

Sorry, Mom, Sorry, Dad

Better luck next time

A couple packs a day, pierced nose and tattoos on our legs

No strangers to pretend, we've always been too proud to beg

Sorry, Mom, Sorry, Dad

Better luck next time

Boys will be boys”

This song referencing a “couple of drop out kids” just going with the flow made me think of how Sunset Curve probably never would have finished high school.

15. Just Like You by Three Days Grace

“You thought you were there to guide me, you were only in my way

You're wrong if you think that I'll be just like you

I could be mean

I could be angry

You know I could be just like you.”

Both Luke and Alex have tons of resentment for their parents, obviously.

16. Sunstroke by Less Than Jake

“We've all been living proof

That time won't wait or choose

We know it ticks on without me and you

And I can't have both sides

Letting go or holding tight

I'm burning bright tonight”

This song about being stubborn and time not waiting really reminded me of Luke, plus the foreshadowing of them becoming ghosts and adapting to a whole new world.

17. Saint Bernard by Lincoln

“Saint Calvin told me not to worry about you

But he's got his own things to deal with

There's really just one thing that we have in common

Neither of us will be missed”

This song just made me think about Alex and his Catholic guilt.

18. Bedroom Hymns by Florence and the Machine

“This is a good a place to fall as any

We'll build our altar here

Make me your Maria

I'm already on my knees

You had Jesus on your breath

And I caught Him in mine

Sweating out confessions

The undone and the divine

This is his body, this is his love

Such selfish prayers and I can't get enough, oh”

Part 2 of Alex and his Catholic guilt. Their relationship has become more carnal, and this song maybe gives a little of Alex’s perspective into that time.

19. Church by Fall Out Boy

“And if death is the last appointment

Then we're all just sitting in the waiting room

I am just a human trying to avoid my certain doom

If you were church, yeah

I'd get on my knees”

Here ends the trilogy of songs with religious references. This song is heady and sensual and also includes some nice foreshadowing of their deaths.

20. Bros by Wolf Alice

“Shake your hair, have some fun

Forget our mothers and past lovers, forget everyone

Oh, I'm so lucky, you are my best friend

Oh, there's no one, there's no one who knows me like you do

Are your lights still on?

I'll keep you safe

If you keep me strong”

Here’s another song from Luke’s perspective- talking about forgetting mothers, being best friends, and keeping Alex safe, as long as Alex keeps him strong.

21. Slip Away by Perfume Genius

“Don't look back, I want to break free

If you'll never see 'em coming You'll never have to hide

Take my hand, take my everything

If we only got a moment

Give it to me now

They'll never break the shape we take

Baby, let all them voices slip away”

Alex struggles with losing his family over his sexuality, and Luke helps him through it.

22. Make Out In My Car by Sufjan Stevens

“I'm not trying to

Go to bed with you

I just wanna make out in my car

And though I'm dying to

Fall in love with you

I just wanna make out in my car”

Another great song about just wanting to exist with someone, about wanting touch and feel and create. They don’t want to fall in love, they just want to be.

23. I Exist I Exist I Exist by Flatsound

“I remember the way you shook

Its a shame that we're not soul mates

Because if i didn't know better

I'd say this feels pretty good

How could i be scared?

When i stretch and feel that you're there

So shut your mouth

Because these words will speak themselves

I can feel them in these blankets

And they're surrounding your figure

Embraced in the quilts

And i cant help but think

You're my missing puzzle piece”

This song is so beautiful- with references to helping a partner through anxiety, and being just like ones mother... a lot of this dynamic in my mind is Luke and Alex reminding each other that they exist, that life is wide and bright, that they’re alive. This gives a window into Luke’s inner feelings as well.

24. Come on, Mess Me Up by Cub Sport

“I found comfort, I fell in love with avoiding problems

But I want this, you know I want this

So come on, mess me up

And you can break me, if you'll still take me

Ruin me, if you'll let me be one of the ones you say you won't forget”

At some point, they become more reckless about their feelings, a little less level headed about their arrangement. Intimacy is an escape.

25. Please Never Fall In Love Again by Ollie MN

“This is what it's like to be lovers

You and me need never be lonely again

Spin with me endlessly or at least until the end

Please never fall in love again”

As usually happens with these arrangements, feelings are caught. Luke and Alex consider making things more serious.

26. Can I Call You Tonight? by Dayglow

“Batteries drain, I get the memo

I think that I might have to let you go

So can I call you tonight?

I'm trying to make up my mind

Just how I feel

Could you tell me what's real?”

The end of their relationship is near, and Alex is unsure. You can decide if this takes place before or after they die.

27. Wicked Game by Chris Isaak

“I never dreamed that I'd meet somebody like you

And I never dreamed that I'd lose somebody like you

No, I don't wanna fall in love with you”

Eventually these relationships all start to feel like games, don’t they?

28. Perfect by The Smashing Pumpkins

“So far I still know who you are

But now I wonder who I was

Angel, you know it's not the end

We'll always be good friends”

Another song about the end of a relationship, and finding yourself again. There’s a bit of resentment there, but they are learning to be friends again.

29. Miss Missing You by Fall Out Boy

“Maybe I'll burn a little brighter tonight

Let the fire breathe me back to life

Baby you were my picket fence

I miss missing you, now and then”

They’ve gotten over each other and become friends again, but are still nostalgic for the past. Bonus points for references about coming back to life.

30. Good Riddance (Time of Your Life) by Green Day

“For what it's worth

It was worth all the while

It's something unpredictable

But in the end it's right

I hope you had the time of your life”

Ah yes, the song everyone uses to commemorate bittersweet ends- it’s the perfect clincher for this playlist.

I hope you all enjoy listening!

#julie and the phantoms #lalex #jatp #luke patterson #alex mercer #jatp playlist #luke/alex #playlist #my edit

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interesting-blog-name · 4 years

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LOOSE REVIEWS (It Looks Sad., Pablo’s Paintings, Vancouver Sleep Clinic, Steve Lacy)

Just a bunch of very quick, very throwaway reviews that I put together while I’m writing the Björk discography post (I’m currently at Vespertine, so this shit is gonna take a while). Mostly slightly underground bands, all very short projects and one of them don’t even have a project, but you should check them out. Anyway.

It Looks Sad. – Songs For Quarantine

Not much to say about this. It is a 9-minute EP, obviously not meant to be taken as a serious, ambitious release, but it’s from a band I wanted to check out: It Looks Sad.. They’re categorized as emo, but their style reminds the listener a lot more of shoegaze and dream pop, at least from what I’ve heard by them (right now, this and Drool, which fits cozily in my Summer playlist).

If you want some moody music for the quarantine (if it’s still going on by the time I post this) and you don’t care if the songs sound like they were recorded in an underwater cave, then go ahead and listen to this I guess. It’s average as fuck but whatever, that’s the point.

WORST TO BEST: Eyes, Love, Waves, Bug

bedroom music/10

“*insert shoegaze mumbling here*”

It Looks Sad. - Kaiju

2015 EP. Two tracks, one sucks and the other is tolerable. Like I really don’t know what the fuck the singer was trying to do with Creature, he’s hollering all over the place, and the delivery would be more at home in maybe some poorly-recorded punk song, but the instrumental is nothing like that, as it’s pretty much indie-rock 101; not to mention the lyrics, which are the blandest broken-hearted songwriting I’ve heard yet, probably. I now understand how truly emo they were.

For Nagoya, I can at least say the hook is pretty cool, but that’s it really. I guess I’m grateful they changed their style.

2.45/10

“Best friend this is terrible. You know it’s inevitable. I hope you come back, I hope he comes back.”

Pablo’s Paintings

Just wanted to give a shoutout to the underground Leeds, Yorkshire band Pablo’s Paintings. I had listened to Lizard a long while ago, and loved it, so I decided to check out the rest of their stuff today (May 25th), and it’s very solid. The track You’ve Got A Long Way To Go draws heavily from a psychedelic influence, while Paint’s Gone Dry and So Long (All Your Friends) sound like something The Beatles would maybe write.

I guess you could call them formulaic, but their mixing and distinct sound are all pretty good for a band that hasn’t gotten a song with over 2000 streams on Spotify. Their songs can be a little to bubblegum-ish, such as So Long (All Your Friends) which doesn’t really stand out as many others, but for the most part, they deliver. Can I Draw You Something? has a slight edge to it, in comparison, but still sporting cute lyrics about just drawing for someone, and Ghost In The Machine has a great progression to it, and a very cool cover art to accompany it. It’s clear the band has a taste for visual arts, from the lyrics to the band’s name.

In short, they do have a long way to go, and I hope they release an album soon, considering all but two of their Spotify singles were from last year; I’d be the first to listen to it.

WORST TO BEST: So Long (All Your Friends), Paint’s Gone Dry, You’ve Got A Long Way To Go, Can I Draw You Something?, Lizard, Ghost In The Machine

good band check them out/10

“I draw these lines and take them for a walk. I find that I say things better when I don’t need to talk”

Vancouver Sleep Clinic – Winter

Contrary to the name, the band Vancouver Sleep Clinic is from Australia. Led by ambient singer (a term I didn’t know existed until today) Tim Bettinson, from my understanding, the band have partly built their audience by reeling people into the music by putting having the songs feature in TV shows and movies and whatnot, since there’s a hefty list of times their songs have appeared in this type of media on their Wikipedia page. I decided to listen to Winter because I discovered Stakes from the fact that the $uicideboy$ sampled it on the song Sold My Soul To Satan Waiting In Line At The Mall, and liked it a lot. The EP as a whole, however, not nearly as much.

To start off with the main problem I have with Winter, the tracks are all the same. Seriously, I cannot distinguish one from the other; all the songs are soaked in reverb and mainly center around simple acoustic guitar chords and generic pianos, mixed with Tim’s head voice and sometimes the dumb decision to include a synthesized drumming track, like in Vapour, where the fast-paced hi-hats sound so out of place and clip so badly in your ears, it sounds like your earphones are having a mini seizure, but not in a cool way. Meanwhile in Flaws, there’s this unnecessary, wack finger-snapping that makes it sound like I’m listening to some techno song with around 3000 views on YouTube (I do like his backing vocals in the track though).

At its best, tracks like the opener, Collapse, offer an actually powerful passage, in that song’s case, the hook breakdown, where the 808 drum patterns are actually very welcome, and the synths under it are very beautiful and harmonize really well. The final track, Rebirth, also attempts a grand breakdown of sorts, but falls flat because the song is so unnecessarily stretched out and weirdly segmented, and it’s so unexpected: the song is a slow piano/guitar ballad as usual, and then, around 3 minutes in, after the song fades out almost entirely and tricks you into thinking it ended, the drum kicks start rising and all of a sudden there’s... something? I don’t even know what instruments are playing apart from the superimposed drums and what I think is an electric guitar, because it sounds like god knows what, an overheating computer mixed with some shrieking sound, which I assume is the guitar, way off in the background. And then Tim sings a last verse and the song suddenly ceases to exist. Same thing happens with the shortest track here, (Aftermath), consisting of 4 lines, your average piano and strings, and of course, the reverb. It builds up an epic instrumental, and after the brief singing section, just ends. No further instrumental work, just woosh. It’s gone.

I will give credit to Tim’s verses. Even though they’re always delivered with the same intonation, his lyrics are alright, and at least in Stakes, he employs some backing vocals that really make the track, and the hook is magnificent. They tend to blend into one another, with constant themes being metaphors for words he should have or regrets saying, the cold (obviously, given the EP title), sometimes drowning/large bodies of water, and of course, all tracks are about melancholy and heartbreak. But in some parts of the EP, his verses really do feel like some alright poetry, such as the awkward last verse in Rebirth (“I’m starting again, tearing my flesh, stripped to the bone, the all that I’ve grown. Leaving behind, breathe like a child. It’s taken the winter to find who I am”) or the already mentioned beautiful hook in Stakes. In most of the songs, however, I find his themes to be too repetitive and, I wouldn’t say uninspired, but run-of-the-mill.

So overall, the EP doesn’t amount to much. All the tracks attempt to go this emotional route, but they’re very repetitive, and that numbs them and robs them of their emotion a lot. Listen to it if you want to relax, or maybe even sleep to it if you want to take their name literally.

WORST TO BEST: Vapour, Flaws, (Aftermath), Rebirth, Collapse, Stakes

4/10

“I sunk in oceans blue, now they’re all frozen over. I should have took your hand, we should have crossed the border.”

Steve Lacy – Steve Lacy’s Demo

Member of The Internet, singer-songwriter, guitarist, bassist, drummer and producer Steve Lacy is an artist I’ve wanted to check out for a while. I have at some point in my life heard his song Looks, off this demo, but thankfully I forgot how it went so I can check it out again. It’s gonna be a quick listen and review, but I’m curious (and while looking him up I found out he won a Grammy with Kendrick’s DAMN., for producing, backing vocals and songwriting, so that’s cool, congrats Steve).

Right away, I’ll just mention this project is very lo-fi. As in, the drums and his voice are poorly mixed. I’ll give it a little bit of a pass because this man played all the instruments in here and I appreciate the fuck out of that, but anyway. You can tell right at the first track that singing isn’t Steve’s forte, at least in this album, at this time. The hook in that song is just bad, the good part are the instruments, the guitar riffs and the very dynamic bassline, plus the fun little bongos. However, just like all songs here except Dark Red, this is waaaaaaaay too short. It has two short hooks, the verse, and that’s it. The songwriting, I feel, is one of Steve’s more substantial talents; this song I just mentioned is mainly about how a relationship can’t progress because the two involved don’t like much about each other apart from their looks, and Ryd is all about taking a girl to your backseat, but even though these themes are very simplistic, Steve fleshes them out into something more interesting and melodically rich. In Ryd, his smooth vocals surf over the sunny riffs, but what takes away from it are the weirdly mixed drums, as they sound like they’re playing way louder than they should be. The track is groovy though.

The most focused song here, Dark Red, tells the story of a man who’s worried his girl might leave him soon. The instrumentals are nothing special, very basic, and same with the vocals, even though they’re more rooted and solid in this song. The next song, Thangs, emphasizes its bass way more than other songs, but once again, Steve’s voice is not pleasing to listen to, specifically his high-pitched backing vocals, they’re awful. The lyrics are the most basic here, and this song just goes by without leaving any impact after ending pretty abruptly.

Haterlovin is weird. The vocals are way too low, but I like how they differentiate themselves by not going the melodic route, instead Steve chooses to rap them, and his flow in the verse is impressive, but at the same time the hook is way too repetitive for the song to work, and even though it’s nice he switched up and focused the track on the drums, it still leaves it pretty bare.

To close it up, Some brings some promise, with a pretty funky bassline and hook, but then ends out of nowhere and starts a hidden track, Snaily, which I admit has nice falsetto vocals from Steve, but I don’t know why I couldn’t be a separate track. Overall, the album isn’t great, but I appreciate how organic and talented Steve is. Throughout the songs, his creativity is pretty noticeable, so I can’t hate his efforts, but unfortunately his ideas don’t find the right light to shine here.

WORST TO BEST: Thangs, Haterlovin, Looks, Some, Dark Red, Ryd

4.5/10

“Next thing I know she was feeling on me, and I was in the M double-O D when she said park my car down the backstreet”

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acrobaticcatfeline · 5 years

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Rebuilding a Broken Mind, an Orphan Sanders fic

Word Count: 6484

TW: swearing, only a little bit, death mention, murder mention, doctors? patton is a veterinarian, idk if doctors is a trigger but you know better safe than sorry, i wrote thomas as bi and married to a chick but hes dead so like? also patton is pan and likes a chick. patton gets overwhelmed and cries a lot.

Notes: This is my orphan au and i cherish it they’re all such goods.

Pairings: uh none really, thomas and valerie, patton is crushing on my OC.

Summary: “Oh! Um, hi! My name is Patton Sanders, nice to meet you! Um, I’m 20, a veterinarian, and well, I’m an orphan.” Patton lost his parents when he was 15 and had to raise himself and his three younger brothers on his own. hes 20 now, and hes got a job and hes starting to get his life together. Of course with reminders of his parents constantly surrounding him, it makes it hard to really move on.

Oh! Um, hi! My name is Patton Sanders, nice to meet you! Um, I’m 20, a veterinarian, and well, I’m an orphan. I have three little brothers named Virgil, Logan, and Roman! They are so super awesome! Virgil is the sporty guy at his high school, he’s 17 and the captain of like, all of the schools’ sport teams! Logan is my little genius! He’s only 14, but he’s a whole two years ahead and in high school with Virge! Roman is my theatre kiddo, he’s in every arts program at his school and knows how to play just about every instrument at only 9!!! Now, as for me, I’m nothing special, I just try really really hard, so my brothers are safe. I triple timed high school and college so that by the time I turned 18 I had my degree in veterinary medicine. Logan claims I pulled an Aaron Burr by doing this, which I don’t fully understand, but I assume it’s a cool thing. I only did what I had to though, we were already orphaned by the time I started high school, which meant we had no money for college. My high school said that it would pay all my college expenses if I followed the guidelines set, and so I super dashed through school. I managed to ace just about all my classes with some help from my friends and siblings. But that isn’t what this is about. I’m not the focus in this story, I’m just the narrator and eyes. This is a story about 4 kids forced to grow up far too fast. This is a story of the children of the most amazing people. Because when it comes down to it, we’re broken minds, struggling to put ourselves back together.

Now, to start, we have to explain what happened first. Our parents, Thomas and Val Sanders were out at a college play that a friend of theirs was a part of. Unfortunately, they never made it out alive. One of the people attending the play started a shoot-out with about 5 others helping him. Nearly the whole auditorium was killed. Including them.

We had no living next of kin, so a family friend took us in for a short while before dropping us all off at the orphanage. I will never forget that day. I remember them letting us grab our important things from our old house. I remember crying while holding all my siblings close. I remember having to be dragged out of my home. I remember the looks of pure pity from the orphanage staff. I remember them trying to separate me from my brothers. I remember almost punching them. I remember the name of the staff member who was the only one to understand and let us stay together, his name was Terrance. I remember hugging him before we were ushered off. I remember the confusion from Roman when we told him we weren’t going home. I remember Virgil carrying him around telling him that this was home now, with faux excitement and a plastic smile. I remember Roman thinking mom and dad were still coming back, and none of us having the heart to tell him otherwise. I remember Logan not speaking at all for the next month. But most of all, I remember the broken parts that got littered everywhere we went.

I was 15. Roman was only 4. We were broken beyond repair. At least, I thought we were. I thought for sure that we were going to go straight from the orphanage to the homeless shelter. But I did it. I managed to do something, and it changed our lives forever.

The day before I turned 18, I went through with my plan. I have friends named Joan and Talyn who already had a house due to Talyn’s parents having money to spare. They let us stay with them for as long as we needed. We brought all of our things over and we explained the rules of this new situation. My bros were quick to follow instruction. The next day we officially moved out of the horrible child prison we were owned by. I was already well into my job as a vet tech and was able to fully become a veterinarian the next month due to my boss seeing that I was at least twice as competent as the resident vets. And so, it began.

It was bittersweet when we got our own place, as Joan and Talyn had grown to adore my little brothers in the short year we lived there. But I had finally earned enough money to rent a house, plus the orphanage contacted me, telling me about a very large inheritance we apparently had, which was somehow enough to buy said house. We ended up moving in and used the money I earned for beds and a couch.

Over the next year we bought more furniture and accessories as we saw fit. At the present moment, my room is bright blue with animal posters and pop culture references sprawled about randomly. Logan and Roman’s room is split in half. One side is meticulous with dark blue and black walls and a few nerdy posters, mostly of doctor who and Sherlock Holmes. The other however, was messy as all get out, had musical posters everywhere and usually had the mess all the way up to the metaphorical line. Logan never complained unless Roman’s things crossed it. Now Virgil confused me. I was planning on him sharing a room with me, but he refused, claiming that I needed privacy and rest since I was working full time and he wasn’t. All he wanted was a couch, some bedding, music, and some makeup. Because I’m a stubborn mule, whenever he lets me buy him things, I buy him the most bestest makeup and all his favorite albums, as well as some of the best headphones sold. He gets mad at me, but he deserves the world and more.

Okay, now we’re in the present! So, I might as well start the actual story now. Ok well then. Its Friday morning, today the big game at the high school is happening, which means Virgil has to leave early for practice. By early, I mean about the time that I leave for work which is 6 am.

I get up and make food like I normally do, only doubled because Lo and Virge usually sleep for another half an hour. Ro always gets up with me because I’m his ride to school. Virgil has a motorcycle that he drives himself and Logan to school on. I start up some friendly conversation as we eat, Virgil still groggy from sleep.

“are you ready for the game today? Isn’t it against the school rivals? I hope you guys beat them again, but I’m sure you will with such a good captain!!!” I wink at him as he chuckles.

“yeah, we’ve got this, if anything, I’ve got this, and that’s really the point. Yeah, it’s our rivals, the panthers, today. Not that they’ve ever been a challenge. We’ve swept the floor with them for countless years. And thanks for the poorly concealed compliment. Do we have anymore coffee?” he rambles off answers to my questions.

“yeah, but I don’t get paid til tomorrow and there’s only a cup worth left. Proceed at your own risk.” As soon as I say it, Logan zooms to the coffee and brews it for himself, cackling maniacally (giggling cutely).

“HAHAH!!! You will never get a drop of the saccharine nectar!!! Tis mine, forever and always!” he brushes his hair back with his hand and smiles at us. Roman beams and stands up in a fighting stance.

“thou shalt not loot this poor pauper of his deserved libation!!! Come at me thy villainous fiend!” and quickly the two start playing mock sword fighting. Me and Virgil laugh as Logan gets vanquished and the cup of coffee gets given to V. Logan ends up stealing some still, to my amusement.

We end up splitting up as the kiddos go to school and I head to work. I walk in, put on my coat, and then the place blows up. There is a half dead dog on my table and another 2 that are at least stable waiting. I’m apparently the only actual vet that showed up today. Great. Today’s gonna be fun.

I’m not gonna go into what happened at work, because honestly, not much happened. It was an average day at work, but now is time for the interesting part!!! So, the big game at the high school is happening today right? Well, let me talk about it!

So, I go and pick up Roman from school and head over to the high school while asking Ro about his day. He learned a healthy amount of animal and plant biology, so I talk about some of the things he didn’t understand and made a few biology puns which were received quite well luckily! When we get to the school, I call Logan to figure out where he had stationed himself. We meet up and find a nice spot on the bleachers. Not long after, the teams came out and started playing. Virgil is easy to spot, not to mention the announcers are constantly shouting about him as he keeps running the ball the furthest of either team. The game is pretty average for the most part, up until the very end. Virge takes the win but not a second after, he gets tackled full force to the ground. I stand up and look over the crowd as I see him up again, shoving the other guy away. The guy gets up close to his face and I think Virgil is going to punch him-oh god please don’t punch him. The guy gets dragged away by the referee and Virgil has a bunch of teammates coming to check on him and I feel much less on edge. I shouldn’t though. As soon as I think it’s done the announcers go quiet and the stands go crazy as Virgil uppercuts the guy and then knees him in the stomach.

“what just happened there?! Kyle, why did Sanders just risk his high school career like that?!”

“Fitton insulted sanders’ younger brother.” Oh. Oh no. Oh HELL NO! Logan stands up and looks in the direction of the guy and visibly shudders. Oh, he’s lucky that V got to him first. Oh, I might be going to jail guys! The rest of this story might be told from prison!

“Logan, do you know that guy?” I ask calmly. He looks at me before turning away.

“um, yeah. He uh, he’s an ex of mine…” I tense up. He’s never told me about him having been in a relationship! He tells me everything! Ugh, that’s not important right now…

“is he a freshman? I haven’t seen him on the team before.” Lo nods.

“yeah, we met at the local library. I didn’t tell you cuz I didn’t think you’d want me to date someone and um, never mind… Anyways, we broke up cuz he was trying to pressure me into doing um, bad things.” I twitch. Oh, I might kill him. I shake my head and take Roman’s hand and start walking down towards the team to pick up Virgil. We get down there and I check up on Virgil, checking for medical issues; he very well could have gotten another concussion. I get distracted when Virgil hisses at something behind me.

“oh, calm down parselhead. I wasn’t even coming over here for you” I hear in a low drawl behind me. “how’s it hanging bookie?”

“first off, I’ve told you what that actually means and that that nickname bothers me, please cease this instant, and second, I’m doing fine how are you Loki?” I hear Logan say calmly. I tense slightly and turn around with an angry look on my face.

“Logan you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to. I know for certain I wouldn’t if I were you.” Logan looks at me but shakes his head.

“I can converse with an ex and still be civil about it Pat. It’s no problem.” he smiles softly at me, but I can’t help the anger that swells in my chest seeing the huge smirk that this guy is wearing.

“yeah Patton we can be civil here, no need for this hostility. Anyways, I’m doing fantastic Logan! Thank you for asking! I even have a new boyfriend, one who doesn’t try to keep me a secret.” His voice is contradictory to his words.

“it was two years ago, and I was twelve and still in an orphanage, I didn’t need my older brother worrying about me anymore than he already did. Plus, I barely understood my emotions, how do you think I would deal with my brothers’?” Logan crosses his arms and looks up at him accusingly.

“I dunno, I sorta thought you were enjoying the relationship, but you just ended it for no reason, citing your brother as too intimidating to cross, and neither of them look that scary to me.” He says and I look over to Logan in confusion. He walks closer to him and starts talking again, harsher than before.

“you and I both know that wasn’t what happened. You got pissed off that I didn’t want to go smoke and bang you arrogant prick. Also, I’d watch what you say about my brothers if I were you.” He just smirks while he backs away.

“okay then, I see I’m no longer wanted here. See you round bookie.” He walks away, and Logan shakes his head and face palms.

“every fricking time… I try to be civil but he always… ugh never mind it doesn’t matter. V are you okay? I don’t know what Loki said, but I can almost guarantee it was a lie. Also, he has a ridiculously hard skull, don’t ask how I know that, are you bleeding? Concussed?” Logan looks up at Virgil with a worried smile.

“yeah, I’m sure it was a lie, didn’t make it any less enraging. And no, I’m not bleeding or concussed. You dated him? How?! He’s such a prick!!!” Logan laughs.

“I don’t know, he was interesting. He told good stories and listened to me when I needed to vent. He’s also an incredibly good pillow. Really, he was just, the person I needed at the time, I guess.” He shrugs. Virgil is still watching him leave with an angry glare fixed on his face. I decide to change the topic.

“hey guys, you want pizza for dinner tonight? Food for champions!” the other three smile and cheer. V changes out and we head home, and I hand make three pizzas from scratch the way that we usually like it. Dad loved pizza and he said my pizza was the best, so I usually make it for celebrations or as a pick-me-up. It seems like its serving as both tonight. While its baking I make a couple of announcements.

“okay, so I’m going shopping tomorrow morning, but when I’m done with that, I thought we’d go visit Joan and Talyn? They have some presents for you all.” All three of them look up from what they were doing with wide eyes and smiles.

“YEEEEESSS!!! JOAN AND TALYN ARE SUPER AWESOMAZINGSAUCE YAAAAAAYYY!!!” Roman screams. I giggle as Roman jumps around and hugs me. Logan laughs along with me as he pulls Roman away.

“calm down Ro, Pat is cooking, you can’t be that close to the hot oven. I’m excited too, yes Ro.” Virgil looks at me questioningly.

“why do they always get us gifts? It seems like every time we see them, they have stacks of presents for us.” I shrug.

“well, I sort of introduced my lifelong friends to my 7, 12, and 15-year-old brothers who were sort of helpless at the time. They like me, but they adore you guys. Some kind of cool grandparent syndrome I guess.” Virgil laughs loudly at this as the pizzas beep. I pull them out to cool and tell some more puns to pass the time. The evening goes on without a hitch, we play a round of word association games as we eat our pizza. I pack up the leftovers in lunch bags for the 4 of us and then clean up the kitchen. As I finish with that, Roman shouts for me to tell him a story.

I tell a story of a brave prince who has to protect his kingdom from a fierce dragon witch. The dragon witch had stolen away the princes soon to be bride. The prince fought through many trials to save his fiancé, however he was beaten to it by another beautiful princess who had won the maidens heart instead. The prince was of course fair, as the princess had fairly bested him, and so he went on a mission to love himself before he went around looking for a fitting bride-or groom, again. Roman sleepily cheers and snuggles into a black cat plush V gave him.

The most difficult to get to sleep is Logan, who just wants to read all night. He changes to a different book just as I walk over to his desk. “Lo, you need to go to bed. You want to be well rested for tomorrow kiddo. You can read your book tomorrow, I promise the ending won’t change, and it won’t leave without you.” He yawns, he has had a long day.

“if I go to sleep will you sing for me? Please?” he looks at me with puppy dog eyes.

“of course, Lo. Bookmark your page and go get ready for bed and I’ll sing for you.” He smiles and rushes off to get ready. He’s back in a few minutes.

“can you sing dads old lullaby? If not its ok but-” I cut him off.

“of course, I can Lo.”

“somewhere there’s someone who wants you to be

How they want you to be, their opinion

They’ll paint you the colors that they wanna see

And to them, its Monet,

But to you, it’s a gray, silhouette

So, pick up a pencil, a stencil, a crayon,

The picture is not finished yet

You can let someone else tell you your story,

You can let someone else tell you what’s true

Or you can set yourself free,

Climb the tallest highest tree,

Or maybe sit back and take in the view,

You can let yourself, let yourself do

Anything.”

By the time I finish the chorus, Logan is sound asleep, snoring softly and cuddling an owl plush. I get up, tuck him in, turn off the lights, then head into the living room. Virgil is laying on the couch with his headphones on full blast. I grab his sleep meds and a cup of water and hand them over to him.

“hey, you shouldn’t listen to your music that loud, it could damage your hearing. You don’t have to listen to me, but I just wanted to let you know. I worry about you guys, you know?” he smiles and takes the meds. He turns down the volume on his headphones and nods.

“sorry Pat, I didn’t realize they were that loud. And, we worry about you too. You do way more for us than you have to. Anyways, thanks for the meds and sleep well okay? Don’t stay up all night again.” I giggle and nod before giving him a quick hug and going to my room.

I do a few pieces of paperwork that I wasn’t able to do before the end of my shift and send a quick text to my vet tech Elenora, checking in on her, as she’s been off on vacation and she’s supposed to be getting back tomorrow, and she has some things she needs to pick up at the office. She’s also absolutely amazing and sweet and beautiful and I love talking to her so so much. But that’s beside the point. After I get all of that done, I check the time, realizing that its now 11:45 and I should have been in bed an hour ago. I quickly fall asleep soon after luckily.

The next day is super-duper hectic so like, hold onto your horses, this is gonna be a wild ride! Okay okay, so I get up at 8 and go shopping, blah blah, tons of coffee because my boys and I have a problem. I unload everything by 10 which is when the kiddos are waking up. Virgil apologizes for not waking up to help but I wave him off as I start to make a small lunch because three meals a day, but Joan and Talyn are probably going to take us out for lunch knowing them, so I don’t want us to lose our appetite, that’d be rude! Anyways I set out the 4 plates and eat mine before going to take a quick shower. By the time I shower and change, all three of them are conversing around the table. I smile fondly because, hey, I helped raise these fantastic kiddos! LOOK AT MY BROTHERS!!! Okay, I’m good now. I walk up to the table and they all smile happily at me before going back to their debate.

“listen, if you have straight caffeine you die, therefore this stuff is totally deadly and like, we’re slowly killing ourselves by drinking it.” Virgil says, being devil’s advocate per usual.

“well yes but that’s like chlorine and sodium!!! They are both deadly elements on their own, but together give us salt! Not to mention that even too much water can kill a human! And! Another point, coffee is a natural occurrence just like water!!! In reasonable quantities, coffee is perfectly safe!!!” Logan rants passionately making me glad that I invested some money into speech and debate for him. Roman grins.

“but if water, coffee, and salt could kill us, does that mean that the world is trying to kill all life on it?!? are we living on a death rock?!? LOGAN IS THE WORLD GONNA KILL US?!?!” his grin slowly gets sadder and more scared as he continues. Logan flinches slightly.

“I mean, technically humans have been killing the earth for years so I wouldn’t put it out of the question that that is the reason that everything on earth is potentially deadly to humans. That would make sense… gosh darn it why do you always send me into steadily collapsing bouts of existentialism?” Logan shakes his head likely jumping into one of his existential crises.

“do I want to know the opening remarks?” I ask and they all shake their heads no. I grab a mug and make myself some creamer with a hint of coffee. Heheh!!! Caramel coffee is very good, but caramel mint coffee is even better! Roman runs off to get changed right as Logan goes to take a quick shower. V asks to change in my room which I am totally ok with because of course!!!

Oh! I should say what we’re wearing shouldn’t I? okay okay, so I wear my favorite pair of khakis, which are quite worn from wear. I wear a pun-ny shirt about dogs, and a tan cardigan with black white and purple plaid shirt underneath. I also have some nice black boots. When Roman comes out, he’s dressed in a red theatre shirt, white jeans, and a white fluffy coat, with his favorite white fluff boots. Logan comes out with his talk nerdy to me tee, black ripped skinny jeans, a black fluffy jacket, black boots, and a snap back. Virgil ends up wearing his nirvana shirt, black ripped skinny jeans, leather jacket, and black converse.

Logan sneaks up behind Roman and puts one of his Disney caps on him. Roman gasps because Lo never shares his hats. He tries to give it back but Lo tells him not to. “I got that one just for you Ro, keep it.” I think RoRo almost cries as he dashes into a cute embrace with Lo. Logan giggles as he sees his baby brother smile. It really is the best feeling ever when you can be the cause of a smile.

Soon after the scene of pure wholesomeness, we head on our way to Joan and Talyn’s house. We are greeted by happy faces and a stack of gifts. This is normal I guess, like V mentioned, they always have piles of gifts for us.

“hiya!!! Glad you could make it! We decided to make a big meal instead of going out, I hope you guys don’t mind?” Talyn grins sheepishly. “and we also invited a couple more people. Sorry we didn’t tell you it was a surprise!”

“a surprise? Who’s here?” I ask, looking around them both to see. There are more gifts than usual. And they’re gift wrapped. Oh gosh what did I forget? Wait… what month is it? oops. I might’ve said that out loud.

“its January Pat.” Joan states simply with a growing grin. Oh god, it’s my birthday soon isn’t it.

“happy early birthday Patton-cake!” Talyn yells happily. Yup. Oh, I’m an idiot. I facepalm.

“I’m glad Joan called me on Monday, otherwise I wouldn’t have gotten your presents from us and brought them over!” V smirks as we walk in. of course they were all plotting against me, I should have known! As I walk in, I see Leo, Jamahl, Dominic, Dahlia, Kenny, Derionna, Rafaela, calypso, and oh god, how did they get Elenora?!? I don’t think I’ve ever even talked about her to them!!! Not to mention that she must be horribly jetlagged!

“oh my god no way!!! I love you guys so much aaaa!!! How do you even know Elie?!?” I say as I go around giving hugs to my friends from back in high school that I’ve missed so much.

“dude, Els is in a bunch of my classes. She never shuts up about work, so it was easy to find out that you guys knew each other. Not to mention her constant fawning over ‘doctor sanders’” Elie punches Joan in the arm.

“listen here bean boozled, are you gonna keep outing me or are we gonna start this party? I estimate the time between now and when I fall unconscious from exhaustion and jetlag is t minus 4 hours.” She states matter of factly. God, I love her, I’m so far gone.

Joan and Talyn attack me with a hat while I’m fantasizing, and they laugh mischievously as they drag me over to the table. Joan’s saying something in one ear and Talyn’s saying something else in my other and I’m confused as heck, but all my friends surround me as well as my baby brothers and start singing at me. I don’t even comprehend what they’re saying because my brain can’t remember the last time I had a surprise party, and its actively making me remember my 14th when my dad and mom threw me a giant birthday bash and it was all day long and we fell asleep in a pile on the couch and before I can stop it all the voices start freaking out and I touch my face and I finally notice that I’m crying, and gosh I just ruined it of course gosh darn it they all went out of their way to make this and now I’m just sad and crying. I feel a thud and finally pay enough attention to see Roman hugging me tightly and apologizing. I pat his head and smile at him before kneeling down and reassuring him.

“Ro Hun, it’s not your fault I’m crying, I just remember mom and dad that’s all. I was caught up in my head but I’m fine. I promise ro. Do you wanna help me blow out the candles?” Roman smiles widely and nods. I pick him up and we blow out the candles together. The others all smile and cheer. Joan stands next to me with a smirk. Oh gosh they’re going to have me do something dangerous and I’m gonna agree because its going to be fun and d a n g e r o u s.

“you realize we are stealing you tomorrow to go barhopping right? Els even offered to dd for us! I mean of course, she’s sorta still underage for a few more months, but yeah, you, me, Talyn, and els are going to have birthday bash part two and its going to sick as Fu-” I cover their mouth before they can finish their swear.

“my baby brothers are here!!! No swearing!!! It’ll hurt their poor innocent ears!!!” I see Virgil and Logan give me a skeptical look before I gesture at Roman and I see their eyes widen in realization, before they nod furiously in agreement. Roman obliviously drags Logan off to play with the bubbles that Joan had gotten to keep the little ones occupied. I uncover their mouth and shoot them a look before giving it up for a smile as I hug them.

“thank you for this Joan, it’s kind of you. You didn’t have to really, haven’t even seen you guys in a few months!”

“that’s exactly why we did it. We don’t need a reason to give the littles gifts, and if we have a reason to give you gifts you won’t turn them down. You never have been one for spontaneous presents, but you know what, I love ya man, and you deserve to get shit on your birthday you oaf. I always felt bad that you wouldn’t let me help you and the kids when we were still in high school. God its been so long now, we’re old pat! You know my mom always tells me that they’d be so proud of you whenever I tell her what you’ve been doing. She actually wanted me to give you something, its wrapped in the pile of gifts.” They winked and nodded over to the living room where far too many gifts in my opinion, were sitting. The rest of my friends were there too, keeping themselves entertained one way or another, and I saw that Logan and Roman were running around outside chasing bubbles.

I go over to the stack and feel immediately intimidated. I hear the door open and Roman and Logan come inside. They sit behind me and I grab the first present that I can reach. The wrapping is purple plaid and Virgil’s name is scrawled on the tag. I open it up and look at my brother with a mocking look as I pull out a pale blue lab coat with dog face emojis.

“oh my gosh you dork I love it!!!” I pull it on quickly, seeing how it fits and beam at him.

“I’m glad. You’ve got another one somewhere from me” ugh of course that’s how there’s so many gifts.

I grab the next one with the same wrapping and rip it open only to see a new surgical kit, which I had been desperately needing to get but had been avoiding. They’re ridiculously expensive and I haven’t had the money to spare. I don’t know how vee could have managed to get that much money, and I don’t understand why he would spend it on me. I feel tears welling up in my eyes for the second time today, and launch myself at Virgil, picking him up and twirling him around. I see Elenora look at the tools out of the corner of my eyes.

“holy crap how did you afford these? This set is worth almost a thousand!” Virgil gives a feeble look as I set him down.

“I’ve been saving up for a few months, no big, you had mentioned you needed a new set a while ago, and I know you wouldn’t let anyone give you one. You can’t give this one back otherwise it’d be wasted so ha I win.” He ends with a smirk, and I punch him in the arm for calling me out on my OCD about work.

I grab my next gift which is a deep red with a matching bow. I peel off the paper and see a Pooh bear onesie and I smile down at it before laying back to smile at Roman who is giggling loudly.

“Lo helped me find it!!! I know you love Pooh, so I thought you’d like it!!!”

“he had tried to get you a size that fit him at first it was really quite adorable. We got him a Tigger one to match but we told him he had to keep it hidden until you got yours.”

I reached out for a hug and instead Roman kissed my nose then pushed me back into a sitting position. I huffed dramatically before grabbing my next gift, from Logan. I rip open the striped paper and see a book called animal madness, about animal mental health, and I feel my smile widen. There’s another book, by Jackson galaxy called total cat mojo and I might have squealed a little bit?

“LOGAN, I LOVE THIS THANK YOU SO MUCH OH MY GOSH OH GEEZ THESE WILL BE SOOOOO HELPFUL!!!!!!” Logan smiles and chuckles softly.

“I had imagined so, you have said that a couple of your patients have had mental issues more than physical and you’ve seen them more often due to their owners not knowing how to treat them, I hope the books hold deeper insight than google.”

I give him a big hug, and then grab the next presents, opening one after another all very sweet but also rather irrelevant gifts including coffee, cooking ware, and fandom stuff. I eventually get to Elenora’s gift though, which I was slightly scared about opening if I’m being honest? It could be anything, what would she get me? I open the rose gold box that holds a few different items. The first I notice is a necklace with a four pawprints on them, each a different color, red, navy, cyan, and purple, and each with me and my brothers’ names. I smile softly at it as I put it on. The next thing in the box is a new stethoscope that matched my light blue theme at work. After that is a build a bear Alolan Vulpix plush with an absolutely adorable cloak and a spare outfit. I squeeze it and it sounds so cute??? I’m so glad I share my obsession with Pokémon with her it makes work that much more enjoyable. The next thing I pull out is a dual sapphire and ruby pop head set and I let out a laugh at it, she knows me so well, I had mentioned I loved their characters and that they reminded me of my mom and dad once offhandedly, and yet she’s gotten me ruby and sapphire things three times now. I pull out a gift card to pizza shop I adore, and the last item in the box is a card that says read later, so I throw a glance her way as I put the card in the pile.

I thank her, and give her a hug, before turning my attention to the last present remaining, the present from Joan’s mom, who was basically my second mom growing up. I pull apart the wrapping hesitantly, and I almost let out a choked sob at what is in the package. It’s a letter from my parents. I cover my mouth as I grab the letter and read it.

“dear Patton, we hope this letter reaches you in good health, and that we are still in contact when you reach 21.” I make some odd strangled noise and my eyes start filling with tears. “no matter how our relationship is, we have a present for you. Patton cake, we know you’re only a year old now, but when you get this, we want you to know that no matter what we love you so so much and we want you to be happy no matter what. So, if you’ll forgive us if we’ve hurt you, we want you to have this glass and drink. Your mom made that glass right after you were born. She believes that the essential gift for a 21-year-old was a wine glass and a nice red wine. This wine is the same one I had on my 21st with my father and I saw it fitting to share it with you. I love you so so much son, and I hope you know that you’re in my heart wherever I am. The same goes for your mother. You know me and how paranoid I am, so this will probably be given to you by my best friend who I don’t doubt will grow close to you. In case anything happens, not that it will.” I don’t think I can breathe anymore oh my god this is from my dad- “but anyways ill stop rambling” no dad please keep talking don’t go please! “happy birthday Patton, you make me and your mom so proud. I love you so much” I wheeze and double over, I can’t breathe my dad, it was almost like he was there again, my dad was there and I-

I open the wrap on the glass, the crystal glass has an imprint that has the words “you’re capable of anything” and me and my parents’ names inscribed in it. Etched in, not just printed, its won’t fade, it will always be there. I look up at the roof to stop my tears, and to hopefully tell my mom and dad I love them if there is an afterlife. I wish I could see them one more time and be able to say goodbye. I can’t, but god it hurts so bad, I miss them so much its not fair they should have been able to come home they should be here they should have been here to see Roman and Logan and Virgil grow up it’s not FAIR GOD DAMN IT!!! I need to calm down, its in the past its over I can’t change it I can just keep going. I take a few deep breaths and wipe my eyes. I set down the glass and look at Joan.

“Joan, I need you to thank your mom for me, I-I owe her so much for this I can’t even properly explain just how much this means to me. If she ever needs anything let me know, I will do anything to help.” Joan nods and smiles at me softly.

I breathe a few more deep breaths before standing up.

“now, that’s enough of that. There’s cake and games!!!”

#tw swearing #tw cursing #tw death mention #tw murder mention #Orphan AU #my writing #my fanfiction #logan sanders #virgil sanders #patton sanders #roman sanders #joan and talyn #others but just mentioned #my oc #elenora #lots of crying

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deltaengineering · 6 years

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Summer Anime 2018 Part 1: Nurupo

I feel bad for calling last season weak now, since that turned out okay, what with Megalobox, Hinamatsuri and Rokuhoudou (the best show you didn’t watch). Maybe this is a lesson to not be so negative, but all the positivity in the world can’t make this season look good. To balance it out, I’ll be bringing along some hot opinions from people getting paid to see the bright side this time.

P.S. Part 2 is here.

Island

What: A very Frontwing version of When They Cry, apparently. Awesome McCooldude wakes up on an island full of pliant girls and/or dark secrets.

✅ looks alright

❌ story is tryhard mystery nonsense based on convenient amnesia, very unlikely to deliver

❌❌ an absolutely terrible cast of generic VN characters, enjoy your common route hijinks with them

❌❌ Frontwing being Frontwing, please see picture.

ANN sez: “This episode accomplishes the two things that it absolutely must for the series to have a chance of succeeding: it makes the main trio of girls endearing enough and layers on some intriguing mysteries.”

Hanebad!

What: Some girls take badminton very seriously. Somewhere between genocide and extinction level event seriously.

✅ well animated and directed

✅ there appears to be more to the characters than nothing at all, so the overbearing presence of the drama llama might actually pay off

❌ has a tendency to wallow in ostentatious KyoAni-style presentational kitsch

❌ speaking of which, making the cast of Euphonium look like a bunch of carefree slackers by comparison is not a good thing

ANN sez: “From the lush colors of their school's flowers to the alienating saturation and long shots of their gym hallways, every mood HANEBADO strives for is captured perfectly through its visual storytelling, and solidified through fundamentally sturdy dialogue and plotting.”

Senjuushi

What: Touken Ranbu with firearms.

❌ This is a cute boys doing cute things anime set against a backdrop of global thermonuclear war and combining the ultra seriousness of ufotable TR with the slice of life tone of Doga Kobo TR makes for a very, let’s say, “uneven” experience.

❌ Unsurprisingly, it has the production values of neither of the above and looks like crap instead.

❌❌ The localized title is “The Thousand Musketeers” and given the reckless pace in which it introduces pointless characters, it might actually hit that number in 12 episodes.

❌❌ Mobile game character designs must be stopped, for fuck’s sake

ANN sez: “The story itself has some promise, especially if you're a fan of antique guns.“

Shichisei no Subaru

What: VRMMO light novel garbage about MMO newtypes.

❌ High tier light novel tropes like “u die in the game u die 4 real”, grade schooler magical girlfriends and demigod abilities

❌ Yes, the characters start as grade schoolers and then there’s a timeskip where they become high schoolers. They don’t change at all, which is either cutting commentary on arrested development or an indication of how good this show’s writing is.

❌ Ideas like permadeath in an MMO and giving good players a stake in the game company are hilariously stupid even by this genre’s standards.

❌ You’ve seen this exact cast of characters before, likely in better shows.

❌❌ There’s really no single egregiously bad aspect, but the stank of mediocrity is so overwhelming as to deserve a double minus all of its own.

ANN sez: “This episode banks heavily on the appeal of its mysteries, but those mysteries actually are pretty appealing, and I ultimately respect this episode's choice to introduce so much of its world and characters before getting to the real conceit.”

Banana Fish

What: A well regarded classic manga about New York’s seedy gang underbelly of drugs and violence. And BL.

✅ ✅ Looks good. Like actually, legitimately good. Animation, character design, directing, this show is quality.

❌ Updating the setting to contemporary times seems like a not so great idea since everything about this is deeply steeped in the mid-80s gang violence and drugs panic, no matter how many smartphones get used.

♎ The pacing is ultra fast. While I will admit that I’ll take that over a snoozefest (especially in a seasonal rundown), if this wants to be a legitimate high tier anime it needs to let the atmosphere breathe more. 24 episodes isn’t much for a 19-volume manga.

❌ I’ve praised MAPPA for promising first episodes before, and then I got the likes of Yuri on Ice and Virgin Soul out of it. This is not an anime original so it will be harder to fuck up, but life finds a way - especially given the need for condensing the story as noted above.

❌ Ultimately, just being a classy production with proven writing isn’t the be-all-end-all; quality aside, I still have to like what it does, and I’m not sure what amounts to a homoerotic 80s crime B-thriller is exactly in my wheelhouse.

✅ What else are you gonna watch this season?

ANN sez: “The one negative I can foresee is that one character is portrayed as a fairly stereotypical gay sexual predator, and this story pitches itself consistently as a seedier exploration of its boys' love subject matter, so it's reasonable to expect these kinds of details going forward.”

Yume Oukoku to Nemureru 100-nin no Ouji-sama

What: Girls get their wish-fulfilment isekai nonsense too, it’s just a pretty pointless definition when you can just say “basic otome harem” instead. But sure, nondescript girl wakes up in fantasy dream universe where she has a magical trait that makes a large number of princes desire her. Call it what you like.

♎ Successfully avoids the most obnoxious otome harem and isekai tropes, but that just makes it even more bland

❌ lots of exposition about an universe that is hardly complicated and transparently an excuse anyway

❌ Main character is agreeable but exceptionally boring

❌ The princes are all generically princely and very little else

❌❌ combine that with sluggish pacing and this might be the most boring show so far, which is not an easy feat

ANN sez: “There were also some neat details here and there that I particularly appreciated, like the fact that our heroine is actually a working adult, as well as the idea that rather than being “trapped in a new world” she's in truth been returned to her home.”

Back Street Girls

What: A trio of yakuza thugs get a forced sex change because their boss wants to be an idol producer. It’s funny, laugh.

❌ This is not the warm, fuzzy trans acceptance anime you’ve been looking for, to put it mildly. I am not easily offended, but it would have to be pretty darn good to outrun this premise. Yeah, about that...

❌❌ runs its one joke (idols are not supposed to be thugs, like, at all!) into the ground before it exceeds a 3-minute short runtime; is actually 24 minutes long anyway. Hope you really like that joke.

❌❌ the execution of said joke is the pits of anime comedy, nothing but reaction faces and shouting

❌❌ production values are basically non-existent, at most you can say that they took the time to color in those manga panels

❌ learning that Chiaki Kon is directing this pile is just sad, put THAT in your auteur pipe and smoke it.

ANN sez: Nothing, since western licensors mysteriously chose to skip this one. Really a shame because I was looking forward to the outrage.

Isekai Maou to Shoukan Shoujo no Dorei Majutsu

What: It has “Isekai” and “Maou” in the title so what do you fucking think. What it doesn’t tell you is that it’s also about an MMO, for the full LN shitter nuclear triad.

❌❌ It’s about a loser otaku who gets trapped in his MMO wherein he has the mostest hax, complete with complementary slave pettan catgirl and slave oppai elf

❌❌ This is meant to be funny because he’s too much of a dweeb to put his penis where his mouth is.

❌ Technically better executed than Death March or Isekai Smartphone, so it gets one single minus for effort.

ANN sez: “The idea that Takuma is so insecure about talking to other people that he can only comfortably speak in the voice of his demon lord character is ingenious in a dramatic sense and endearing in a personal one, while Takuma's clear understanding of his personal failings makes him far more sympathetic than the genre's usual snarky protagonists.”

Satsuriku no Tenshi

What: Early teen girl checks herself into Silent Hill General Hospital for grief counselling.

✅ Atmosphere works reasonably well; it’s creepy where it needs to be, which is everywhere and all the time.

❌ The girl is a nonfactor blob and the tough guy she gets paired up with is an annoying chuuni edgelord (it is called 𝔄𝔫𝔤𝔢𝔩𝔰 𝔬𝔣 𝔇𝔢𝔞𝔱𝔥 after all), which is not promising for the long run

❌ So obviously based on a run-of-the-mill spoopy RPGmaker freeware game you can practically see the floor tiles.

❌❌ 24 solid minutes of Getting Cornered By A Rape Metaphor quickly goes from unsettling to incredibly tedious.

❌❌ There’s really nowhere for this to go, given how unoriginal everything is; at best it’s going to be “it was all a dream”, at worst “everyone was dead all along, please feel sad now”.

ANN sez: “The design of the facility is one of those fanciful every-level-is-a-different-setting worlds, but the artistic effort strongly pushes the creepiness factor with a design aesthetic that suggests age, decay, and neglect.“

Harukana Receive

What: Girls play beach volleyball in scenic Okinawa, some light sports drama seems to be on the horizon.

✅ Looks just good enough

✅ Girls are just cute and likeable enough

❌ the sports aspect is weak; maybe I’m just spoiled on Emiya-san’s incredible beach volleyball scene right now, but even when not compared to a top tier studio ostentatiously flaunting the budget of their fucking cooking short the match here isn’t very compelling.

♎ where Hanebad has a bad case of the cereals, this may have the opposite problem of being too cotton candy to be worth it

✅ “good enough” is not a ringing endorsement, but counts for something when being just okay will net you a third or possibly second place of the season.

ANN sez: “This is, of course, all just conjecture right now. ”

Chio-chan no Tsuugakuro

What: We took Nichijou and replaced the surrealism with video game references and the production values with donkey dung. Let’s see if delta notices!

❌❌ Production values are not optional when you want to be Nichijou; it being astoundingly over the top and imbued with impeccable timing is a (or even the) main part of Nichijou’s appeal. Without them you’re left with basic reactionface manzai over awkward situations, the king of comedy.

❌❌ Suffice it to say, this show is 100% trying to be funny, while also 100% not succeeding at being funny.

❌Asscreed is a more original tentpole to rotate your first episode around than the usual Dragon Quest, but not by much.

♎ neurotic nerd main character that is little more than a bundle of social anxieties will be #relatable to anime professionals, observe:

ANN sez: “Chio's overthinking in this situation is both hilarious and painfully true-to-life, with her furious strategizing coming across as both absurd and very familiar to anyone who's not comfortable in conversation.”

Planet With

Wat: Appears to be a tokusatsu/crypto-mecha show aimed at the younger set, with the gimmick being that our protagonist is (initially?) on the side of the villains(?).

✅ Pretty wacky, actually. It definitely doesn’t neatly fit in your square notions of what an anime is, man (unless you’ve watched FLCL).

❌ It seems very uncertain whether the wackiness is in service of anything. It might be To Be Heroine, or it might just be Heybot with fewer fart jokes.

♎ Furthermore, it wants to be intriguing and sort of is, but merely being intriguing is not that hard - you just make no sense and hope for the best. This has the not making sense part down, do you feel lucky?

❌ tries to build up characters by immediately going for the sad flashbacks, which I never like, especially if the rest of the show is eIDLIVE-level nonsense.

❌ Looks mostly fiiiiiine, but is also full of subpar CG

ANN sez: “So if the heroes are fighting against someone who just wants peace, then what does that make them? And more importantly, if they find out that the bears aren't evil, will they stop?”

Hataraku Saibou

What: A cutesy educational comedy about the workings of a human body.

✅ Well made, characters are cute, topic is interesting.

❌ Educational aspect can get in the way; I’m not suddenly giving heavy exposition a pass just because it’s trying to teach me something, especially if it’s things I basically already know.

♎ Will have to show if it can keep coming up with good scenarios. The lung infection in episode 1 was alright and so will probably be the skin cut in the preview, but beyond that I’m not sure what’s left for red and white blood cells to do. I’m not expecting a show with this tone to tackle things like retroviruses, if you know what I mean.

♎ An actual storyline seems like too much to expect, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing but not a positive either.

✅ Doesn’t rock my socks off but is an easily watchable show with a fine idea and high production values, which again is hard to say no to right now.

ANN sez: “But since it culminates in one of my favorite scenes from the manga, visualizing sneezing as shooting a torpedo out your nose, I can forgive the random gendering of cells.”

Ongaku Shoujo

What: DEEN are getting in on the idol mobile game anime biz too.

✅ The main character’s gimmick is that apart from being A Honk, she can’t sing for shit; this is moderately funny.

❌ It might have counted for more if that hadn’t come out seconds before the episode ended. Even if it isn’t a momentous twist, it was more of a point of interest than the incredibly bland leadup to it had.

❌ Yeah, “Ongaku Shoujo” is an entirely indicative name of how generic this show is: Music + girls, indeed. I assume “Idols” was taken.

❌ I’m still not sure what the ideal cast size of a show like this is, but 12 idols is Idolmaster turf and as such too many. They have personalities? I think?

❌ a very small handful of cuts aside, woeful production quality; I know picking on DEEN is 2ez but this is not their finest work. Animation snobs can feel proud that there’s no CG dancing here, for the rest of us it’s an object lesson on why CG is the lesser of two evils.

✅ Tumbling SR cards in the ED (which is probably actually the OP) made me laugh; this show can’t even afford URs.

❌❌ Overall, just another idol show. Large cast plus presence of a P-san marks it as Im@s-type – but if you're in the market for an Idolmaster clone with bad looks, I would recommend Wake Up Girls instead because that’s at least pretty real at points.

ANN sez: They’re out for the weekend, ask again later. I suspect it’s nothing funny.

#anime #impressions #summer2018 #banana fish #island #senjuushi #hanebad #shichisei no subaru #yume oukoku to nemureru 100 nin no ouji sama #Isekai Maou to Shoukan Shoujo no Dorei Majutsu #back street girls #satsuriko no tenshi #harukana receive #chio-chan no tsuugakuro #planet with #hataraku saibou #ongaku shoujo

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standtoreason93 · 5 years

Text

The Bible: Reading the “Ordinary” Way

By Greg Koukl

I never like the question “Do you take the Bible literally?” It comes up with some frequency, and it deserves a response. But I think it’s an ambiguous—and, therefore, confusing—question, making it awkward to answer.

Clearly, even those with a high view of Scripture don’t take everythingliterally. Jesus is the “door,” but He’s not made of wood. We are the “branches,” but we’re not sprouting leaves.

On the other hand, we do take seriously accounts that others find fanciful and far-fetched: a man made from mud (Adam), loaves and fishes miraculously multiplied, vivified corpses rising from graves, etc.

A short “yes” or “no” response to the “Do you take the Bible literally?” question, then, would not be helpful. Neither answer gives the full picture. In fact, I think it’s the wrong question since frequently something else is driving the query.

Taking “Literally” Literally

Let’s start with a definition. According to the New Oxford American Dictionary, the word “literal” means “taking words in their usual or most basic sense without metaphor or allegory, free from exaggeration or distortion.” Why do people balk at this common-sense notion when it comes to the Bible or, more precisely, certain passages in the Bible?

Let’s face it, even non-Christians read the Bible in its “usual or most basic sense” most of the time on points that are not controversial. They readily take statements like “Love your neighbor as yourself” or “Remember the poor” at face value. When citing Jesus’ directive “Do not judge,” they’re not deterred by the challenge “You don’t take the Bible literally, do you?”

No, when critics agree with the point of a passage, they take the words in their ordinary and customary sense. They naturally understand that language works a certain way in everyday communication, and it never occurs to them to think otherwise.

Unless, of course, the details of the text trouble them for some reason.

What of the opening chapters of Genesis? Is this a straightforward account describing historical events the way they actually happened? Were Adam and Eve real people, the first human beings? Was Adam created from dirt? Did Eve really come from Adam’s rib? Did Jonah actually survive three days in the belly of a great fish? Did a virgin really have a baby? Such claims seem so fanciful to many people, it’s hard for them to take the statements at face value.

Other times, the critic simply does not like what he reads. He abandons the “literal” approach when he comes across something in the text that offends his own philosophical, theological, or moral sensibilities. Jesus the only way of salvation? No way. Homosexuality a sin? Please. A “loving” God sending anyone to the eternal torment of Hell? Not a chance.

Notice the objection to these teachings is not based on some ambiguity in the text that makes alternate interpretations plausible. The Scripture affirms these truths with the very same clarity as “Love your neighbor.” No, these verses simply offend. Suddenly, the critic becomes a skeptic and sniffs, “You don’t take the Bible literally, do you?”

This subtle double standard, I think, is usually at the heart of the taking-the-Bible-literally challenge. Sometimes the ruse is hard to unravel.

An example might be helpful here.

Literal vs. Lateral

In the Law of Moses, homosexual activity was punishable by death (Lev. 18:22 and 20:13). Therefore (the charge often goes), any Christian who takes the Bible literally must advocate the execution of homosexuals.

Of course, the strategy with this move is obvious: If we don’t promote executing homosexuals, we can’t legitimately condemn their behavior, since both details are in the Bible. If we don’t take the Bible literally in the first case, we shouldn’t in the second case, either. That’s being inconsistent.

How do we escape the horns of this dilemma? By using care and precision with our definitions, that’s how.

Here’s our first question: When Moses wrote the Law, did he expect the Jewish people to take those regulations literally? If you’re not sure how to answer, let me ask it another way. When an ordinance is passed in your local state (California, in my case), do you think the legislators intend its citizens to understand the words of the regulations “in their usual or most basic sense without metaphor or allegory, free from exaggeration or distortion”?

Of course they do. Legal codes are not written in figurative language allowing each citizen to get creative with the meaning. The same would be true for the Mosaic Law. Moses meant it the way he wrote it.

But now, it seems, we’re stuck on the other horn of the dilemma. To be consistent, shouldn’t we currently campaign for the death penalty for homosexuals? For that matter, aren’t we obliged to promote execution for disobedient children and Sabbath-breakers, both capital crimes under the Law?

The simple answer is no. Here’s why. Even when a biblical command is intended to be understood literally, that does not mean it is intended to be applied laterally, so to speak—that is, universally across the board to all peoples at all times in all places.

Consider this situation: Jesus told Peter to cast his net in deep water (Luke 5:4). That’s exactly what Peter did because he took Jesus’ command literally, in its ordinary sense. He had no reason to think otherwise. However, even though Jesus’ command to Peter was literal, that does not mean the same command applies laterally to everyone else. We’re not obligated to cast nets into deep water just because Peter was.

Here’s another way of looking at it. California legal codes are to be readliterally, but not applied laterally. They only apply to those in California and have no application to people in other states. Its laws have local, literal application within its own borders, but no lateral application elsewhere.

In the same way, the words of the Mosaic Law, like those of all laws, are to be taken at face value by anyone who reads them. Yet only those under its jurisdiction are obliged to obey its precepts.[i]

The Jews in the theocracy were expected to obey the legal code God gave them, including the prohibition of and punishment for homosexuality. It was not the legal code God gave to Gentiles, however. Therefore, even if the words of the Mosaic Law were to be taken literally by those under the jurisdiction of that code, this does not mean that in our current circumstances we are governed by the details of the provisions of that Law.

A clarification is necessary here. Am I saying that nothing written in the Mosaic Law is ever applicable to Christians or other Gentiles or that there are no universal moral obligations that humanity shares with the Jews of Moses’ time? No, I’m not saying that.

Though Moses gave legal statutes for Jews living in the Jewish state, that Law in some cases still reflects moral universals that have application for those outside the nation of Israel. As I have written elsewhere:

Perversion is still perverse, and wickedness is still wrong, whether it be adultery, rape, incest, or bestiality—or any of a number of evil acts all condemned by Moses in the “old” Law.[ii]

So yes, we can glean wisdom and moral guidance from the Law of Moses for our own legal codes, but there are limits. Working out those details is a different discussion, however. [iii]

The question here is not whether we take the Mosaic Law literally, but whether we are now under that legal code. We are not. That law was meant for Jews living under a theocracy defined by their unique covenant with God. Simply because a directive appears in the Mosaic Law does not, by that fact alone, make it obligatory for those living outside of Israel’s commonwealth.

Americans are a mixture of peoples in a representative republic governed by a different set of decrees than the Jews under Moses. We are not obliged to obey everything that came down from Sinai. Even though it was commanded of the Jews, that does not necessarily mean it is commanded of us. If anyone thinks otherwise, he is duty-bound to take his net and cast it into deep water.

That confusion aside, we’re still faced with our original question: When do we take the Bible literally?

Reading the “Ordinary” Way

Here’s how I would lay the groundwork for an answer. If I’m asked if I take the Bible literally, I would say I think that’s the wrong question. I’d say instead that I take the Bible in its ordinary sense; that is, I try to take the things recorded there with the precision it seems the writer intended.

I realize this reply might also be a bit ambiguous, but here, I think, that’s a strength. Hopefully, my comment will prompt a request for clarification. This is exactly what I want. I’d clarify by countering with a question: “Do you read the sports page literally?”

If I asked you this question, I think you’d pause because there is a sense in which everyone reads the sports page in a straightforward way. Certain factual information is part of every story in that section. However, you wouldn’t take everything written in a woodenly literal way that ignores the conventions of the craft.

“Literally?” you might respond. “That depends. If the writer seems to be stating a fact—like a score, a location, a player’s name, a description of the plays leading to a touchdown—then I’d take that as literal. If he seems to be using a figure of speech, then I’d read his statement that way, figuratively, not literally.”

Exactly. Sportswriters use a particular style to communicate the details of athletic contests clearly. They choose precise (and sometimes imaginative) words and phrases to convey a solid sense of the particulars in an entertaining way.

Sportswriters routinely use words like “annihilated,” “crushed,” “mangled,” “mutilated,” “stomped,” and “pounded,” yet no one speculates about literal meanings. Readers don’t scratch their heads wondering if cannibalism was involved when they read “the Los Angeles Angels devoured the Houston Astros.”

We recognize such constructions as figures of speech used to communicate in colorful ways events that actually (“literally”) took place. In fact, we never give those details a second thought because we understand how language works.

When a writer seems to be communicating facts in a straightforward fashion, we read them as such. When we encounter obvious figures of speech, we take them that way, too.

That’s the normal way to read the sports page. It’s also the normal—and responsible—way to read any work, including the Bible. Always ask, “What is this writer trying to communicate?” This is exactly what I’m after when I say, “I take the Bible in its ordinary sense.”

Of course, some people may differ on what point the text of the Bible is actually making. Fair enough. There’s nothing dishonest about honest disagreement. They might have reasons to think some Christian is mistaken on the meaning of the text. Misinterpretation is always possible. However, conjuring up some meaning that has little to do with the words the writer used is not a legitimate alternative.

If people disagree with the obvious sense of a passage, ask them for the reasons they think the text should be an exception to the otherwise sound “ordinary sense” rule. Their answer will tell you if their challenge is intellectually honest, or if they’re just trying to dismiss biblical claims they simply don’t like.

Two Thoughts on Metaphor

Reading any writing the ordinary way requires we understand two points about figurative speech, both implicit in the concept of metaphor.

The New Oxford American Dictionary defines metaphor as “a figure of speech in which a word or phrase is applied to an object or action to which it is not literally applicable…a thing regarded as representative or symbolic of something else.” So, metaphors take one meaning of a word and then creatively leverage it into another meaning to make an impact on a reader.

Here is the first point to be clear on: All metaphors (or other forms of figurative writing) rely first on literal definitions before they can be of any use as figures of speech. All words must first be understood in their “usual or most basic sense” before they can be used figuratively.

We find, for example, the word “shepherd” prominently featured in the 23rd Psalm. Do you see that we must first understand the literal meaning of “shepherd” before the phrase “the Lord is my shepherd” has any figurative power?

This point is critical for accurate biblical interpretation. Here’s why.

Sometimes we attempt to solve interpretive problems by digging through a Bible dictionary. This can be a helpful place to start since all figurative language relies in some way on dictionary definitions. But the dictionary cannot be the final word because it can never tell you what use a specific writer is making of any particular word or phrase.

Strictly speaking, no word standing alone can be a metaphor. Words can only be used metaphorically when they’re embedded in a context. Therefore, it makes no sense to ask of a solitary word, “Is the word meant literally?” because the word standing on its own gives no indication.

Dictionaries, by definition, can only deal with words in isolation. Other things—context, genre, flow of thought, etc.—determine if the word’s literal sense is being applied in a non-literal way, symbolically “regarded as representative” of something else.

Take two sentences: “The sunshine streamed through my window,” and, “Sweetheart, you are a ray of sunshine to me this morning.” Sunshine’s literal meaning is the same in each case. However, it is used literally in the first sentence but metaphorically in the second. Further, unless my wife understands the literal meaning of “sunshine,” she will never understand the compliment I’m offering her in a poetic sort of way.

So first, literal definitions must be in place before a word can be used figuratively. Second, metaphors are always meant to clarify, not obscure.

There’s a sense in which figurative speech drives an author’s meaning home in ways that words taken in the ordinary way could never do. “All good allegory,” C.S. Lewis notes, “exists not to hide, but to reveal, to make the inner world more palpable by giving it an (imagined) concrete embodiment.”[iv]

Figurative speech communicates literal truth in a more precise and powerful way than ordinary language can on its own. The strictly literal comment “Honey, your presence makes me feel good today” doesn’t pack the punch that the “sunshine” figure provides. The metaphor makes my precise point more powerfully than “words in their usual or most basic sense” could accomplish.

Remember, even when metaphor is in play, some literal message is always intended. Hell may not have literal flames,[v] but the reality is at least as gruesome, ergo the figure.

Once again, it’s always right to ask, “What is the precise meaning the writer is trying to communicate with his colorful language?” But how do we do that? Here I have a suggestion.

The Most Important Thing

If there is one bit of wisdom, one rule of thumb, one useful tip I can offer to help you solve the riddle of scriptural meaning, it’s this: Never read a Bible verse. That’s right, never read a Bible verse. Instead, always read a paragraph—at least.

On the radio, I use this simple rule to help me answer the majority of Bible questions I’m asked, even when I’m not familiar with the particular passage. When I quickly survey the paragraph containing the verse in question, the larger context almost always provides the information I need to help me understand what’s going on.

This works because of a basic rule of all communication: Meaning flows from the top down, from the larger units to the smaller units. The key to the meaning of any verse comes from the paragraph, not just from the individual words.

Here’s how it works. First, get the big picture. Look at the broader context of the book. What type of writing is it? History? Poetry? Proverb? Letter? Different genres have different standards for reading them—obviously.

Next, stand back from the verse and look for breaks in the passage that identify major units of thought. Then ask yourself, “What in this paragraph or group of paragraphs gives any clue to the meaning of the verse in question? In general, what idea is being developed? What is the flow of thought?”

With the larger context now in view, you can narrow your focus and speculate on the meaning of the verse itself. When you come up with something that seems right, sum it up in your own words. Finally—and this step is critical—see if your paraphrase—your summary—makes sense when inserted in place of the verse in the passage.

I call this “the paraphrase principle.” Replace the text in question with your paraphrase and see if the passage still makes sense in light of the larger context. Is it intelligible when inserted back into the paragraph? Does it dovetail naturally with the bigger picture? If it doesn’t, you know you’re on the wrong track.

This technique will immediately weed out interpretations that are obviously erroneous. It’s not a foolproof positive test for accuracy since some faulty interpretations could still be coherent in the context. However, it is a reliable negative test, quickly eliminating alternatives that don’t fit the flow of thought.

If you will begin to do these two things—read the context carefully and apply the paraphrase principle—you will radically improve the accuracy of your interpretations. Remember, meaning always flows from the larger units to the smaller units. Without the bigger picture, you’ll likely be lost.

Don’t forget the rule: Never read a Bible verse. Always read a paragraph, at least, if you want to be confident you’re getting the right meaning of the verse.

Do I take the Bible literally? I try to take it at its plain meaning unless I have some good reason to do otherwise. This is the basic rule we apply to everything we read: novels, newspapers, periodicals, and poems. It’s reading the “ordinary” way. I don’t see why the Bible should be any different.

___________________________

[i] This principle is critical to understanding the role of Old Testament Law in New Testament times.

[ii] See Gregory Koukl and Alan Shlemon, “A Reformation the Church Doesn’t Need: Answering Revisionist Pro-Gay Theology—Part I,” available at str.org.

[iii] For the record, I think the immorality of homosexuality is one of those universal moral laws since, among other reasons, it’s identified in the New Testament as wrong irrespective of the Mosaic Law (e.g., Rom. 1:27).

[iv] C.S. Lewis, The Pilgrim’s Regress, “Afterword to Third Edition,” (Grand Rapids: Eerdmans, 1958), 208.

[v] In more than one instance, Jesus described Hell as “outer darkness” (e.g., Matt. 8:12) and literal flames give light.

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mrkwonandmrchoibabygirl · 6 years

Text

50 SHADES OF KWON JI YONG PT.4

A/N JUST ENJOY!

Genre:Romance/Smut/Fluff/Angst

Rated: Rated-R

Pair: Kwon Ji Yong(aka G-Dragon)x reader

Word count 5,527

pt.1 pt.2 pt.3 pt.4 pt.5

Kiss me damn it! I implore him, but I can’t move. I’m paralyzed with a strange, unfamiliar need, completely captivated by him. I’m staring at Kwon Ji Yong’s exquisitely sculptured mouth, mesmerized, and he’s looking down at me, his gaze hooded, his eyes darkening. He’s breathing harder than usual, and I’ve stopped breathing altogether. I’m in your arms. Kiss me, please. He closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, and gives me a small shake of his head as if in answer to my silent question. When he opens his eyes again, it’s with some new purpose, a steely resolve. “Y/N, you should steer clear of me. I’m not the man for you,” he whispers. What? Where is this coming from? Surely I should be the judge of that. I frown up at him, and my head swims with rejection. “Breathe,Y/N, breathe. I’m going to stand you up and let you go,” he says quietly, and he gently pushes me away. Adrenaline has spiked through my body, from the near miss with the cyclist or the heady proximity to JiYong, leaving me wired and weak. NO! My psyche screams as he pulls away, leaving me bereft. He has his hands on my shoulders, holding me at arm’s length, watching my reactions carefully. And the only thing I can think is that I wanted to be kissed, made it pretty damned obvious, and he didn’t do it. He doesn’t want me. He really doesn’t want me. I have royally screwed up the coffee morning. “I’ve got this,” I breathe, finding my voice. “Thank you,” I mutter awash with humiliation. How could I have misread the situation between us so utterly? I need to get away from him. “For what?” he frowns. He hasn’t taken his hands off me. “For saving me,” I whisper. “That idiot was riding the wrong way. I’m glad I was here. I shudder to think what could have happened to you. Do you want to come and sit down in the hotel for a moment?” He releases me, his hands by his sides, and I’m standing in front of him feeling like a fool. With a shake, I clear my head. I just want to go. All my vague, unarticulated hopes have been dashed. He doesn’t want me. What was I thinking? I scold myself. What would Kwon Ji Yong want with you? My subconscious mocks me. I wrap my arms around myself and turn to face the road and note with relief that the green man has appeared. I quickly make my way across, conscious that Kwon is behind me. Outside the hotel, I turn briefly to face him but cannot look him in the eye. “Thanks for the tea and doing the photo shoot,” I murmur. “y/n… I… ” He stops, and the anguish in his voice demands my attention, so I peer unwillingly up at him. His brown eyes are bleak as he runs his hand through his hair. He looks torn, frustrated, his expression stark, all his careful control has evaporated. “What, JiYong?” I snap irritably after he says – nothing. I just want to go. I need to take my fragile, wounded pride away and somehow nurse it back to health. “Good luck with your exams,” he murmurs. Huh? This is why he looks so desolate? This is the big send off? Just to wish me luck in my exams? “Thanks.” I can’t disguise the sarcasm in my voice. “Goodbye, Mr. Kwon.” I turn on my heel, vaguely amazed that I don’t trip, and without giving him a second glance, I disappear down the sidewalk toward the underground garage. Once underneath the dark, cold concrete of the garage with its bleak fluorescent light, I lean against the wall and put my head in my hands. What was I thinking? Unbidden and unwelcome tears pool in my eyes. Why am I crying? I sink to the ground, angry at myself for this senseless reaction. Drawing up my knees, I fold in on myself. I want to make myself as small as possible. Perhaps this nonsensical pain will be smaller the smaller I am. Placing my head on my knees, I let the irrational tears fall unrestrained. I am crying over the loss of something I never had. How ridiculous. Mourning something that never was – my dashed hopes, dashed dreams, and my soured expectations. I have never been on the receiving end of rejection. Okay… so I was always one of the last to be picked for basketball or volleyball – but I understood that – running and doing something else at the same time like bouncing or throwing a ball is not my thing. I am a serious liability in any sporting field. Romantically, though, I’ve never put myself out there, ever. A lifetime of insecurity – I’m too pale, too skinny, too scruffy, uncoordinated, my long list of faults goes on. So I have always been the one to rebuff any would be admirers. There was that guy in my chemistry class who liked me, but no one has ever sparked my interest – no one except Kwon damn Ji Yong. Maybe I should be kinder to the likes of Paul Clayton and Song Min-ho, though I’m sure neither of them have been found sobbing alone in dark places. Perhaps I just need a good cry. Stop! Stop Now! - My subconscious is metaphorically screaming at me, arms folded, leaning on one leg and tapping her foot in frustration. Get in the car, go home, do your studying. Forget about him… Now! And stop all this self-pitying, wallowing crap. I take a deep, steadying breath and stand up. Get it together Y/L/N. I head for Rin’s car, wiping the tears off my face as I do. I will not think of him again. I can just chalk this incident up to experience and concentrate on my exams. Rin is sitting at the dining table at her laptop when I arrive. Her welcoming smile fades when she sees me. “Y/N what’s wrong?” Oh no… not the Min Hyo-Rin Inquisition. I shake my head at her in a back-off now Min way – but I might as well be dealing with a blind, deaf mute. “You’ve been crying,” she has an exceptional gift for stating the damned obvious sometimes. “What did that bastard do to you?” she growls, and her face – jeez, she’s scary. “Nothing Rin.” That’s actually the problem. The thought brings a wry smile to my face. “Then why have you been crying? You never cry,” she says, her voice softening. She stands, her green eyes brimming with concern. She puts her arms around me and hugs me. I need to say something just to get her to back off. “I was nearly knocked over by a cyclist.” It’s the best that I can do, but it distracts her momentarily from… him. “Jeez Y/N – are you okay? Were you hurt?” She holds me at arm’s length and does a quick visual check-up on me. “No. JiYong saved me,” I whisper. “But I was quite shaken.” “I’m not surprised. How was coffee? I know you hate coffee.” “I had tea. It was fine, nothing to report really. I don’t know why he asked me.” “He likes you Y/N.” She drops her arms. “Not anymore. I won’t be seeing him again.” Yes, I manage to sound matter of fact. “Oh?” Crap. She’s intrigued. I head into the kitchen so that she can’t see my face. “Yeah… he’s a little out of my league Rin,” I say as dryly as I can manage. “What do you mean?” “Oh Rin, it’s obvious.” I whirl round and face her as she stands in the kitchen doorway. “Not to me,” she says. “Okay, he’s got more money than you, but then he has more money than most people in Korea!” “RIN he’s– ” I shrug. “Y/N! For heaven’s sake – how many times must I tell you? You’re a total babe,” she interrupts me. Oh no. She’s off on this tirade again. “Rin, please. I need to study.” I cut her short. She frowns. “Do you want to see the article? It’s finished. Mino took some great pictures.” Do I need a visual reminder of the beautiful Kwon I-don’t-want-you JiYong? “Sure,” I magic a smile on to my face and stroll over to the laptop. And there he is, staring at me in black and white, staring at me and finding me lacking. I pretend to read the article, all the time meeting his steady Brown gaze, searching the photo for some clue as to why he’s not the man for me – his own words to me. And it’s suddenly, blindingly obvious. He’s too gloriously good-looking. We are poles apart and from two very different worlds. I have a vision of myself as Icarus flying too close to the sun and crashing and burning as a result. His words make sense. He’s not the man for me. This is what he meant, and it makes his rejection easier to accept… almost. I can live with this. I understand. “Very good Rin,” I manage. “I’m going to study.” I am not going to think about him again for now, I vow to myself, and opening my revision notes, I start to read. It’s only when I’m in bed, trying to sleep, that I allow my thoughts to drift through my strange morning. I keep coming back to the ‘I don’t do the girlfriend thing’ quote, and I’m angry that I didn’t pounce on this information sooner, when I was in his arms mentally begging him with every fiber of my being to kiss me. He’d said it there and then. He didn’t want me as a girlfriend. I turn on to my side. Idly, I wonder if perhaps he’s celibate? I close my eyes and begin to drift. Maybe he’s saving himself. Well not for you, my sleepy subconscious has a final swipe at me before unleashing itself on my dreams. And that night, I dream of brown eyes, leafy patterns in milk, and I’m running through dark places with eerie strip lighting, and I don’t know if I’m running toward something or away from it… it’s just not clear.

. I put my pen down. Finished. My final exam is over. I feel the Cheshire cat grin spread over my face. It’s probably the first time all week that I’ve smiled. It’s Friday, and we shall be celebrating tonight, really celebrating. I might even get drunk! I’ve never been drunk before. I glance across the sports hall at Rin, and she’s still scribbling furiously, five minutes to the end. This is it, the end of my academic career. I shall never have to sit in rows of anxious, isolated students again. Inside I’m doing graceful cartwheels around my head, knowing full well that’s the only place I can do graceful cartwheels. Rin stops writing and puts her pen down. She glances across at me, and I catch her Cheshire cat smile too. We head back to our apartment together in her Mercedes, refusing to discuss our final paper. Rin is more concerned about what she’s going to wear to the bar this evening. I am busily fishing around in my purse for my keys. “Y/N, there’s a package for you.” Rin is standing on the steps up to the front door holding a brown paper parcel. Odd. I haven’t ordered anything from Amazon recently. Rin gives me the parcel and takes my keys to open the front door. It’s addressed to Miss Y/N Y/L/N. There’s no sender’s address or name. Perhaps it’s from my mom or Ray. “It’s probably from my folks.” “Open it!” Rin is excited as she heads into the kitchen for our ‘Exams are finished hurrah Champagne’. I open the parcel, and inside I find a half leather box containing three seemingly identical old cloth-covered books in mint condition and a plain white card. Written on one side, in black ink in neat cursive handwriting, is:

IWhy didn’t you tell me there was danger? Why didn’t you warn me?

Ladies know what to guard against,because they read novels that tell them of these tricks... I

I recognize the quote from Tess. I am stunned by the irony as I’ve just spent three hours writing about the novels of Thomas Hardy in my final examination. Perhaps there is no irony… perhaps it’s deliberate. I inspect the books closely, three volumes of Tess of the D’Urbervilles. I open the front cover. Written in an old typeface on the front plate is: ‘London: Jack R. Osgood, McIlvaine and Co., 1891.’ Holy shit - they are first editions. They must be worth a fortune, and I know immediately who’s sent them. Rin is at my shoulder gazing at the books. She picks up the card. “First Editions,” I whisper. “No.” Rin’s eyes are wide with disbelief. “Kwon?” I nod. “Can’t think of anyone else.” “What does this card mean?” “I have no idea. I think it’s a warning – honestly he keeps warning me off. I have no idea why. It’s not like I’m beating his door down.” I frown. “I know you don’t want to talk about him, Y/N, but he’s seriously into you. Warnings or no.” I have not let myself dwell on Kwon Ji Yong for the past week. Okay… so his brown eyes are still haunting my dreams, and I know it will take an eternity to expunge the feel of his arms around me and his wonderful fragrance from my brain. Why has he sent me this? He told me that I wasn’t for him. “I’ve found one Tess first edition for sale in New York at $14,000. But yours looks in much better condition. They must have cost more.” Rin is consulting her good friend Naver. “This quote – Tess says it to her mother after Alec D’Urberville has had his wicked way with her.” “I know,” muses Rin. “What is he trying to say?” “I don’t know, and I don’t care. I can’t accept these from him. I’ll send them back with an equally baffling quote from some obscure part of the book.” “The bit where Angel Clare says fuck off?” Rin asks with a completely straight face. “Yes, that bit.” I giggle. I love Rin, she’s so loyal and supportive. I repack the books and leave them on the dining table. Rin hands me a glass of champagne. “To the end of exams and our new life in Seoul,” she grins. “To the end of exams, our new life in Seoul, and excellent results.” We clink glasses and drink. The bar is loud and hectic, full of soon to be graduates out to get trashed. Mino joins us. He won’t graduate for another year, but he’s in the mood to party and gets us into the spirit of our newfound freedom by buying a pitcher of margaritas for us all. As I down my fifth, I know this is not a good idea on top of the champagne. “So what now Y/n?” Mino shouts at me over the noise. “Rin and I are moving to Seoul. Rin’s parents have bought a condo there for her.” “waee, how the other half live. But you’ll be back for my show.” “Of course, Mino, I wouldn’t miss it for the world.” I smile, and he puts his arm around my waist and pulls me close. “It means a lot to me that you’ll be there Y/N,” he whispers in my ear. “Another margarita?” “Song Min-ho – are you trying to get me drunk? Because I think it’s working.” I giggle. “I think I’d better have a beer. I’ll go get us a pitcher.” “More drink, Y/N!” Rin bellows. Rin has the constitution of an ox. She’s got her arm draped over Louis, one of our fellow English students and her usual photographer on her student newspaper. He’s given up taking photos of the drunkenness that surrounds him. He only has eyes for Rin. She’s all tiny camisole, tight jeans, and high heels, hair piled high with tendrils hanging down softly around her face, her usual stunning self. Me, I’m more of a Converse and t-shirt kind of girl, but I’m wearing my most flattering jeans. I move out of Mino’s hold and get up from our table. Whoa. Head spin. I have to grab the back of the chair. Tequila based cocktails are not a good idea. I make my way to the bar and decide that I should visit the powder room while I am on my feet. Good thinking, Y/N. I stagger off through the crowd. Of course, there’s a line, but at least it’s quiet and cool in the corridor. I reach for my cell phone to relieve the boredom of waiting in line. Hmm… Who did I last call? Was it Mino? Before that a number I don’t recognize. Oh yes. Kwon, I think this is his number. I giggle. I have no idea what the time is, maybe I’ll wake him. Perhaps he can tell me why he sent me those books and the cryptic message. If he wants me to stay away, he should leave me alone. I suppress a drunken grin and hit the automatic re-dial. He answers on the second ring. “Y/N?” He’s surprised to hear from me. Well, frankly, I’m surprised to ring him. Then my befuddled brain registers… how does he know it’s me? “Why did you send me the books?” I slur at him. “Y/N, are you okay? You sound strange.” His voice is filled with concern. “I’m not the strange one, you are,” I accuse. There - that told him, my courage fuelled by alcohol. “Y/N, have you been drinking?” “What’s it to you?” “I’m – curious. Where are you?” “In a bar.” “Which bar?” He sounds exasperated. “A bar in Gangnam.” “How are you getting home?” “I’ll find a way.” This conversation is not going how I expected. “Which bar are you in?” “Why did you send me the books, Ji Yong?” “Y/N, where are you, tell me now.” His tone is so, so dictatorial, his usual control freak. I imagine him as an old time movie director wearing jodhpurs, holding an old fashioned megaphone and a riding crop. The image makes me laugh out loud. “You’re so… domineering,” I giggle. “Y/n, so help me, where the fuck are you?” Kwon Ji Yong is swearing at me. I giggle again. “I’m in Gangnam… s’a long way from Seoul.” “Where in Gangnam?” “Goodnight, Jiyong.” “Y/N!” I hang up. Ha! Though he didn’t tell me about the books. I frown. Mission not accomplished. I am really quite drunk - my head swims uncomfortably as I shuffle with the line. Well, the object of the exercise was to get drunk. I have succeeded. This is what it’s like – probably not an experience to be repeated. The line has moved, and it’s now my turn. I stare blankly at the poster on the back of the toilet door that extols the virtues of safe sex. Holy crap, did I just call Kwon Ji Yong? Shit. My phone rings and it makes me jump. I yelp in surprise. “Hi,” I bleat timidly in to the phone. I hadn’t reckoned on this. “I’m coming to get you,” he says and hangs up. Only Kwon Ji Yong could sound so calm and so threatening at the same time. Holy crap. I pull my jeans up. My heart is thumping. Coming to get me? Oh no. I’m going to be sick… no… I’m fine. Hang on. He’s just messing with my head. I didn’t tell him where I was. He can’t find me here. Besides, it will take him hours to get here from Seoul, and we’ll be long gone by then. I wash my hands and check my face in the mirror. I look flushed and slightly unfocused. Hmm… tequila. I wait at the bar for what feels like an eternity for the pitcher of beer and eventually return to the table. “You’ve been gone so long.” Rin scolds me. “Where were you?” “I was in line for the restroom.” Mino and Louis are having some heated debate about our local baseball team. Mino pauses in his tirade to pour us all beers, and I take a long sip. “Rin, I think I’d better step outside and get some fresh air.” “Y/n, you are such a lightweight.” “I’ll be five minutes.” I make my way through the crowd again. I am beginning to feel nauseous, my head is spinning uncomfortably, and I’m a little unsteady on my feet. More unsteady than usual. Drinking in the cool evening air in the parking lot makes me realize how drunk I am. My vision has been affected, and I’m really seeing double of everything like in old re-runs of Tom and Jerry Cartoons. I think I’m going to be sick. Why did I let myself get this messed up? “Y/N,” Mino has joined me. “You okay?” “I think I’ve just had a bit too much to drink.” I smile weakly at him. “Me too,” he murmurs, and his dark eyes are watching me intently. “Do you need a hand?” he asks and steps closer, putting his arm around me. “Mino I’m okay. I’ve got this.” I try and push him away rather feebly. “Y/N, please,” he whispers, and now he’s holding me in his arms, pulling me close. “Mino, what you doing?” “You know I like you Y/N, please.” He has one hand at the small of my back holding me against him, the other at my chin tipping back my head. Holy fuck… he’s going to kiss me. “No Mino, stop – no.” I push him, but he’s a wall of hard muscle, and I cannot shift him. His hand has slipped into my hair, and he’s holding my head in place. “Please, Y/N, yeobo,” he whispers against my lips. His breath is soft and smells too sweet – of margarita and beer. He gently trails kisses along my jaw up to the side of my mouth. I feel panicky, drunk, and out of control. The feeling is suffocating. “Mino, no,” I plead. I don’t want this. You are my friend, and I think I’m going to throw up. “I think the lady said no.” A voice in the dark says quietly. Holy shit! Kwon Ji Yong, he’s here. How? Mino releases me. “Kwon,” he says tersely. I glance anxiously up at Jiyong. He’s glowering at Mino, and he’s furious. Crap. My stomach heaves, and I double over, my body no longer able to tolerate the alcohol, and I vomit spectacularly on to the ground. “Ugh – joesong haeyo*, Y/N!” Mino jumps back in disgust. Kwony grabs my hair and pulls it out of the firing line and gently leads me over to a raised flowerbed on the edge of the parking lot. I note, with deep gratitude, that it’s in relative darkness. “If you’re going to throw up again, do it here. I’ll hold you.” He has one arm around my shoulders – the other is holding my hair in a makeshift ponytail down my back so it’s off my face. I try awkwardly to push him away, but I vomit again… and again. Oh shit… how long is this going to last? Even when my stomach’s empty and nothing is coming up, horrible dry heaves wrack my body. I vow silently that I’ll never ever drink again. This is just too appalling for words. Finally, it stops. My hands are resting on the brick wall of the flowerbed, barely holding me up - vomiting profusely is exhausting. Kwon takes his hands off me and passes me a handkerchief. Only he would have a monogrammed, freshly laundered, linen handkerchief. KJY. I didn’t know you could still buy these. Vaguely I wonder what the J stands for as I wipe my mouth. I cannot bring myself to look at him. I’m swamped with shame, disgusted with myself. I want to be swallowed up by the azaleas in the flowerbed and be anywhere but here. Mino is still hovering by the entrance to the bar, watching us. I groan and put my head in my hands. This has to be the single worst moment of my life. My head is still swimming as I try to remember a worse one – and I can only come up with Ji Yong’s rejection – and this is so, so many shades darker in terms of humiliation. I risk a peek at him. He’s staring down at me, his face composed, giving nothing away. Turning, I glance at Mino who looks pretty shamefaced himself and, like me, intimidated by Kwon. I glare at him. I have a few choice words for my so-called friend, none of which I can repeat in front of Kwon Ji Yong CEO. Y/N who are you kidding, he’s just seen you hurl all over the ground and into the local flora. There’s no disguising your lack of ladylike behavior. “I’ll err… see you inside,” Mino mutters, but we both ignore him, and he slinks off back into the building. I’m on my own with Kwon. Double crap. What should I say to him? Apologize for the phone call. “I’m sorry,” I mutter, staring at the handkerchief which I am furiously worrying with my fingers. It’s so soft. “What are you sorry for Y/n?” Oh crap, he wants his damned pound of flesh. “The phone call mainly, being sick. Oh, the list is endless,” I murmur, feeling my skin coloring up. Please, please can I die now? “We’ve all been here, perhaps not quite as dramatically as you,” he says dryly. “It’s about knowing your limits, Y/N. I mean, I’m all for pushing limits, but really this is beyond the pale. Do you make a habit of this kind of behavior?” My head buzzes with excess alcohol and irritation. What the hell has it got to do with him? I didn’t invite him here. He sounds like a middle-aged man scolding me like an errant child. Part of me wants to say, if I want to get drunk every night like this, then it’s my decision and nothing to do with him – but I’m not brave enough. Not now that I’ve thrown up in front of him. Why is he still standing there? “No,” I say contritely. “I’ve never been drunk before and right now I have no desire to ever be again.” I just don’t understand why he’s here. I begin to feel faint. He notices my dizziness and grabs me before I fall and hoists me into his arms, holding me close to his chest like a child. “Come on, I’ll take you home,” he murmurs. “I need to tell Rin.” Holy Moses, I’m in his arms again. “My brother can tell her.” “What?” “My brother Taeyang is talking to Miss Min.”(boi i hope you get the refrence u know taeyang and min hyo rin...) “Oh?” I don’t understand. “He was with me when you phoned.” “In Seoul?” I’m confused. “No, I’m staying at the Heathman.” Still? Why? “How did you find me?” “I tracked your cell phone Y/n.” Oh, of course he did. How is that possible? Is it legal? Stalker, my subconscious whispers at me through the cloud of tequila that’s still floating in my brain, but somehow, because it’s him, I don’t mind. “Do you have a jacket or a purse?” “Err… yes, I came with both. Jiyong, please, I need to tell Rin. She’ll worry.” His mouth presses into a hard line, and he sighs heavily. “If you must.” He sets me down, and, taking my hand, leads me back into the bar. I feel weak, still drunk, embarrassed, exhausted, mortified, and on some strange level absolutely off the scale thrilled. He’s clutching my hand – such a confusing array of emotions. I’ll need at least a week to process them all. It’s noisy, crowded, and the music has started so there is a large crowd on the dance floor. Rin is not at our table, and Mino has disappeared. Louis looks lost and forlorn on his own. “Where’s Rin?” I shout at Louis above the noise. My head is beginning to pound in time to the thumping bass line of the music. “Dancing,” Louis shouts, and I can tell he’s mad. He’s eyeing Jiyong suspiciously. I struggle into my black jacket and place my small shoulder bag over my head so it sits at my hip. I’m ready to go, once I’ve seen Rin. “She’s on the dance floor,” I touch Jiyong’s arm and lean up and shout in his ear, brushing his hair with my nose, smelling his clean, fresh smell. Oh my. All those forbidden, unfamiliar feelings that I have tried to deny surface and run amok through my drained body. I flush, and somewhere deep, deep down my muscles clench deliciously. He rolls his eyes at me and takes my hand again and leads me to the bar. He’s served immediately, no waiting for Mr. Control-Freak Kwon. Does everything come so easily to him? I can’t hear what he orders. He hands me a very large glass of iced water. “Drink,” he shouts his order at me. The moving lights are twisting and turning in time to the music casting strange colored light and shadows all over the bar and the clientele. He’s alternately green, blue, white, and a demonic red. He’s watching me intently. I take a tentative sip. “All of it,” he shouts. He’s so overbearing. He runs his hand through his unruly hair. He looks frustrated, angry. What is his problem? Apart from a silly drunk girl ringing him in the middle of the night so he thinks she needs rescuing. And it turns out she does from her over amorous friend. Then seeing her being violently ill at his feet. Oh Y/N… are you ever going to live this down? My subconscious is figuratively tutting and glaring at me over her half moon specs. I sway slightly, and he puts his hand on my shoulder to steady me. I do as I’m told and drink the entire glass. It makes me feel queasy. Taking the glass from me, he places it on the bar. I notice through a blur what he’s wearing; a loose white linen shirt, snug jeans, black Converse sneakers, and a dark pinstriped jacket. His shirt is unbuttoned at the top, and I see a sprinkling of hair in the gap. In my groggy frame of mind, he looks yummy. He takes my hand once more. Holy cow – he’s leading me onto the dance floor. Shit. I do not dance. He can sense my reluctance, and under the colored lights, I can see his amused, slightly sardonic smile. He gives my hand a sharp tug, and I’m in his arms again, and he starts to move, taking me with him. Boy, he can dance, and I can’t believe that I’m following him step for step. Maybe it’s because I’m drunk that I can keep up. He’s holding me tight against him, his body against mine… if he wasn’t clutching me so tightly, I’m sure I would swoon at his feet. In the back of my mind, my mother’s often-recited warning comes to me: Never trust a man who can dance. He moves us through the crowded throng of dancers to the other side of the dance floor, and we are beside Rin and Taeyang, Jiyong’s brother. The music is pounding away, loud and leery, outside and inside my head. I gasp. Rin is making her moves. She’s dancing her ass off, and she only ever does that if she likes someone. Really likes someone. It means there’ll be three of us for breakfast tomorrow morning. Hyo-Rin! Jiyong leans over and shouts in Taeyang’s ear. I cannot hear what he says. Taeyang is quite short with wide shoulders, short black hair, and light, wickedly brown gleaming eyes. I can’t tell the color under the pulsating heat of the flashing lights. Taeyang grins, and pulls Hyo-Rin to him, I am shocked. She’s only just met him. She nods at whatever Taeyang says and grins at me and waves. Jiyong propels us off the dance floor in double quick time. But I never got to talk to her. Is she okay? I can see where things are heading for her and him. I need to do the safe sex lecture. In the back of my mind, I hope she reads one of the posters on the back of the toilet doors. My thoughts crash through my brain, fighting the drunk, fuzzy feeling. It’s so warm in here, so loud, so colorful – too bright. My head begins to swim, oh no… and I can feel the floor coming up to meet my face or so it feels. The last thing I hear before I pass out in Kwon Jiyongs’s arms is his harsh epithet. “Fuck!”

a/n it is fun for me to edit these chapters so please leave a like and reblog to share it!

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highbuttonsports · 3 years

Text

The drive for 25: Are the Habs the real deal?

MONTRÉAL - JAN 30/21: Habs goaltender #34 Jake Allen makes a save while Flames #20 Joakim Nordstrom crashes into him during third period action of Saturdays game. The Habs went on to lose 2-0. (Photo by Minas Panagiotakis/Getty Images).

Le Bleu-Blanc-Rouge has been nothing short of stellar through their first 8 games of this shortened season...Marc Bergevin is quietly laughing inside his head saying “I told you so”. After many questionable and unappreciated decisions made by the Habs management team over the past 5 years or so, it is now evident that maybe there was a method to their madness because a team doesn’t start the season 5-1-2 for no apparent reason. Many hockey fans on the twitterverse will argue that we are making too big of a deal over this - cause it is a big deal. We haven’t seen a team this competitive in a long time, it is hard not to be giddy. Also, the Montréal media is fairly intense if you haven’t noticed, however, this years team is different - substantially different.

With that being said, I do not want to speak too soon on the Habs’ recent successes because the season is still only 8 games old - but it is too difficult to not be ecstatic.

However, there’s a sense of urgency and fire within this team that Habs fans haven’t experienced since many moons ago. The Habs have been great in arguably all areas to start, but the most impressive anecdote thus far has been how consistent they’ve been each night. It is one thing to be a great team, but it is a total burden if you can’t put it on display each game like the blue and white team with the maple leaf logo also in the North division...how’s that for a slow burn? All jokes aside, the Canadiens are undoubtedly a top-tier team this season with high expectations and potential now, but that statement will only hold if they maintain their consistency. Consistency is a trait that is hard to come by in sports, and when you have it, you better take it and run with it. The Habs are metaphorically in a full sprint with it right now. Inconsistency kills teams and their seasons, hence, the Toronto Maple Leafs.

The Habs suffered their first regulation loss of the season against the Flames this past Saturday night, giving them a 5-1-2 record and are looking to bounce back against a red hot Vancouver Canucks team who have won their last 4 games. A more than likely pissed off Canucks team will enter the Bell Centre for back-to-back games after the Canadiens stole 5 of 6 possible points off them in their home barn just over a week ago. Also, Canucks forward Brock Boeser is currently tied for the league lead in goals, the Weber-Chiarot pairing might have something to say about that for the next couple nights. These next two games against the Canucks should be incredibly exciting to watch as both teams will look to continue their winning ways in the increasingly competitive North division.

On another note, Victor Mete will be drawing into the lineup for his first game of the season and will be paired with rookie defenceman Alexander Romanov, Kulak will be taking his spot in the press box. In my opinion, I would have rather seen Edmudson sit out instead solely due to the fact that Kulak and Romanov have been amazing together on the blue line thus far. Mete has been scratched for the first 8 games of this season and it was rumoured that he requested a trade. General manager Marc Bergevin quickly shut that rumour down and stated that “it was not true and [he was] not trading him”, courtesy of @PierreVLebrun on twitter. I am firm believer in where there’s smoke there’s fire, and it seems like there’s a lot of smoke in this situation. The rumour became apparent to the media and then Mete was abruptly placed into the lineup with no probable reasoning other than sitting for the first 8 games. If the trade request is true, the Canadiens could be using this game against the Canucks as a “prove us wrong” game for Mete, or they’re simply trying to showcase his abilities to other teams who may be wanting to acquire him. Either way, I can totally understand his frustration as he made great progress last season in the playoffs after he was called up after gaining much needed confidence in Laval. After Romanov showed everyone he was more than capable of playing in the league, it was clear Mete was going to be the odd man out for the time being. With that being said, I think a trade for Mete in the future is likely and warranted for that matter. The 22 year old defenceman needs a fresh start on another team where he can be the 5th or 6th guy every night, he may not have panned out the way the Habs have wanted but he still has high potential - especially out of the scrutiny of the Canadiens media.

The Canadien’s goaltending has been stable thus far with Allen posting a 0.933 save percentage and Price with a 0.898 save percentage over his 5 starts (3-0-2). The tandem may be the highest paid combo in the league and their stats do not necessarily reflect that, but they’re giving us a chance to win each game and that’s the bottom line. It is tremendous what a competent backup goalie can do for a team and Jake Allen has been an excellent addition to the Habs this year. Carey Price was always plagued by too many starts during the regular season due to backup incompetency and that worry is now out the door. Price was nothing short of great in the bubble playoffs last season as he was coming off months of rest and showed that he still has what it takes to be an elite goaltender. With Allen starting every third game or so, the team doesn’t need to play on their heels with him in the cage which has been a problem in the past few seasons. The players in front of Allen can play the same way as they do in front of Price - and that is something many other teams cannot do. Rest and Carey Price has been proven to be a dangerous combination time and time again, thank you Bergevin.

Moving forward, Les Canadiens will look to build on their strong start during this homestand. Newcomer Tyler Toffoli currently leads the team with 9 points (6G, 3A) and will look to build on his recent success against the Canucks. Not to mention, I think Toffoli and Suzuki should just play short-handed moving forward from now on - Toffoli alone has more short handed goals than half the NHL teams in the league. Also, the Drouin-Suzuki-Anderson line has been one of the top lines in the league thus far in terms of production. Currently their expected goals percentage sits at 71.2%, which puts them in third place in the league for lines who’ve played more than 40 minutes together (moneypuck.com). For those of you who may not understand what that means, xGoals % is the probability that an unblocked shot results in a goal, and 71.2% is pretty damn good. The Toffoli-Kotkaniemi-Armia line xGoals % is 69.4% as well (moneypuck.com), but that line was put on hold due to that headshot on Armia from Tyler Myers...kudos to Edmudson for sticking up for him. I’m no math statistician, but if my intuition is even half correct, I’m certain those line combinations should be solidified unless things hit the fan.

Also, if I may add, that blatant headshot by Dillon Dubé on Kotkaniemi was disgusting, if that’s not a suspendable headshot then I don’t know what is. I’m not usually one to pick on a referee because they’re people too like everyone else, but the NHL did not get that right, like at all. Thank goodness KK was alright, but c’mon.

Are the Canadiens the real deal yet? No, not yet, at least by my conservative estimate. Are they good? Yes. They are a four line team right now and are exhausting to play against, but the season is still too young to make that statement. “We can play any way you want to play” is what Bergevin said on the first day of training camp. By all accounts, he was right. The Habs are now a “win at all costs” team now, they are no walk in the park for their opponents anymore. It’s an exciting time to be a Habs fan, the drive for 25 has grown ever more bright.

By: Patrick Nyman

#hockey #nhl news #montreal #go habs go

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whittierwellness · 6 years

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WEBSITE: www.watchmefitness.com

FACEBOOK PAGE: Facebook.com/watchmefitness

INSTAGRAM: watchmefitness

What is your favorite thing about your career/company?

My favorite thing about being a fitness trainer is being able to improve someone else’s life quality. When you want to improve your life’s quality, I firmly believe having a strong foundation (healthy mind & body) will be the first step that one needs to take. To share my story, strength training and proper nutrition in general made me a better person. I became more confident with myself and I started to improve on my social interactions with friends & family. By doing this, it naturally made my quality of relationships much better. And I want to share this experience with those who reach out to me. I want to let everyone know that by simply taking care of your health & wellbeing, you are able to achieve anything that you desire. Oh, and I get to meet A LOT of cool people that I gain insight and learn from.

What motivated you to start your company (a little history)

After witnessing a few key moments in the lives of some of my family members, I knew in order be in control of my future I needed to own my own business. I started working as a freelance trainer since 2015 and officially started my own business this year (2017). I have also always felt like I didn’t fit into the workplace – not because I was weird or didn’t get along with my coworkers, but I wanted to create my own culture that did not coincide with my integrity as an individual. so being my own boss and making my own rules appealed.

Another reason why started my company was to help those around me that had similar problems when they first initially started working out. The truth is, it took me countless years to figure out how to change my body composition. I had trouble losing body fat, but now I am much more knowledgeable going through years worth of trial and error. And I want to help those around me that are going through the exact same problem. I want to share with the world that building a downright incredible physique doesn’t have to be that hard without sacrificing too much of your lifestyle. Fitness is about transforming your body and living the life of your dreams. So essentially, it becomes a metaphor for how you set your own life! When you master your own body with health and nutrition, you can start achieving things in other areas of your life that you never thought it was possible.

What is your proudest accomplishment?

I would say that my proudest accomplishment would be listening to my heart and pursuing my dreams come into reality. I knew it would’ve been easier for me if I just listened to my family’s advice and took the easier way out in regards to my career. I could’ve been working at a regular 9-5 job making decent money and being content with what I have. However, I knew my potential was far greater and I had to make a choice. I truly believe that life is too short to do something that doesn’t ignite you or from the inside. I didn’t want to be an extra in my own movie.

What is the best feature or item from your company?

My goal is to help individuals who are just starting out their fitness journey. And unlike most of the fitness programs that are out there geared towards bodybuilders and advanced lifters, I want to share with the world that you can achieve the best results without sacrificing too much of your lifestyle & nutritional preferences. My program and fitness philosophy are geared towards the general public who just want to look and feel good to go on with their life. You can achieve the best results possible training minimally.. as long as you are knowledgeable understanding the key aspects of nutrition and training.

How would your friends describe you?

I think that my friends would describe that I am responsible, driven, and understanding.

What are your hobbies?

My hobbies include playing poker, watching and playing sports (I love basketball & football), spending time with my loved ones, and bettering myself whether that is through reading or learning from those around me.

List two pet peeves.

I don’t really have any pet peeve’s, but one thing that grind my gears are talking with someone that is inconsiderate or someone that is irrational. I don’t care if we have different views or opinions, that’s perfectly normal, but if you’re being irrational and not accepting when you’re wrong…that pisses me off.

Where do you see yourself in five years?

honestly, I can’t even picture myself or where I’ll be in the next 12 months. But one thing I know is that I’ll be helping a lot of people reach their goals whether that’s through fitness or self development. And hopefully in five years, I’ve become an influencer leaving an imprint in this industry.

If you could go back in time to change one thing, what would it be?

I told myself that I wouldn’t dwell in the past, but if I could go back in time, I just wish that I started my entrepreneurial journey and pursued my passion a lot sooner. I always had this voice inside of me that knew what was right for me,but I couldn’t take action right away. Always listen to your heart!

If you could share a meal with any 4 individuals, living or dead, who would they be?

This one’s hard. Honestly, for this type of question i will have to go with the greats. So I’ll pick two people that are already gone and two people that have great influence on me today. I would love to share a meal with Jesus, Buddha, Gary Vaynerchuk, and Lewis Howes.

GETTING TO KNOW JASON HWANG, MOBILE PERSONAL TRAINER WEBSITE: www.watchmefitness.com FACEBOOK PAGE: Facebook.com/watchmefitness INSTAGRAM: watchmefitness What is your favorite thing about your career/company? My favorite thing about being a fitness trainer is being able to improve someone else’s life quality.

#body #CALIFORNIA #EDUCATION #FUN #Inspiration #JASON HWANG #mind #MOBILE PERSONAL TRAINING #PERSONAL TRAINER #SPORTS #THE HUMAN BODY #training #Whittier

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muzzmurray · 6 years

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year in fic review (2017)

You can find all of the fic mentioned below on my ao3 account, savedby. If you’re looking for my football fic edition, you can find it here.

Year at a glance: Total number of completed stories: 32 Total word count: 77707

Overall Thoughts:

Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d predicted? I wrote way more than I realized for this fandom, um, wow. There were a couple of months where I was writing like four or five fics and I have no idea how that happened.

What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted in January? Oh, the Vegas Golden Knights! Because when they signed two, I was joking around on twitter about how I could ship them now, and my friend was like ‘well, why don’t you’ and then that evolved into Sabaton and by extension into the Bold in Gold series, which was one of the most rewarding parts of my year for sure.

What’s your own favorite story of the year? these tornadoes are for you, which was Nick/Bob and written for the Cannon Fodder exchange. The combination of magic realism, humor and their general softness was really nice to write, and @frecklebombfic did a beautiful podfic of it.

Did you take any writing risks this year? Purely in terms of style, I wrote descent, in second person, which I know tends to polarize opinions. I love it, for whenever I want to write something that feels more immediate and intimate. I actually tried to rewrite it in third person, because the friend I was writing it for told me she wasn’t a big fan of second person, but it just wouldn’t work. It had to be written exactly as it is.

Do you have any fanfic or profic goals for the new year? I’d like to finish this chaptered Mcdrai magic AU fic that I’m working on and I’d like to continue writing the Vegas Golden Knights as their narrative unfolds, so the Bold in Gold series can become a sort of written history of the team and its fandom. Ambitious, but. We’ll see. I’m already working on the next part.

From my past year of writing, what was…

My best story of this year: armet. I think this was in the works the moment I realized that there was a possibility that Flower might go to Vegas and it ended up becoming exactly what I had hoped it would be.

My most popular story of this year: i still get jealous of your old boyfriends, judging by kudos, which is actually funny to me, because for the longest time I really hated what I wrote for that fic and I ended up posting it after having it written for a period of time.

Story of mine most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion: foundations, my Marleau/Thornton fic. I mean, it’s a niche pairing and a character study, so it’s probably as good as it’s going to get, but it’s basically peak me and my love for old men and their narratives.

Most fun story to write: world i can call mine , which was my Pod_together project with @frecklebombfic . Having her input on it was so essential (as it was in many of my fics this year) and I had such a fun time discussing Auston, Zach and Mitch, and poly with her. And her podfic ended up being perfect. It was just a great project.

Story with the single sexiest moment: Man, I don’t know, I’m an ace essentially floundering in the world of smut. But I did manage to post, like 4 explicit stories this year, which just goes to show you that you can be anything you set your mind to, kids. As it is, I’m nominating this line from wake me up come tomorrow

Oscar does, adds another finger only when he feels Adam completely relax into the first. He fingers him slow and easy, watching his face as it relaxes from discomfort to pleasure. Adam makes these noises too, cut off moans, helpless and involuntary. Oscar adds a third finger and he whines, high in his throat.

Most “holy crap, that’s wrong, even for you” story: circumstance, which I hadn’t realized was still posted on anon until right now. So I’m owning up to it, I suppose. I’m not ashamed of it, because it still makes me laugh a lot on re-read, but please heed the warnings.

Story that shifted my own perceptions of the characters: your morning cup, my Tim Horton character study. I didn’t even really know anything about him when I decided I was going to be writing this fic. But as I researched and wrote, the story ended up being one of the most important things I wrote this year.

Hardest story to write: something like hope was an exercise in frustration, until I figured out how to frame it with quotes from Pekka’s Players’ Tribune article.

Biggest disappointment: I don’t really post things I’m actually unhappy with.

Biggest surprise: I was most surprised by how well fandom received Sabaton, because I figured it was something so niche that only a few people would actually click on, but it became one of my most popular stories. I’m really grateful for that.

Highlights + Wrap-up:

Favorite Opening Lines (4):

From tomorrow is going to be pretty pawsome

Ryan is halfway through his breakfast when he hears his front door opening. It’s 9am and he’s not wearing pants, so if he’s going to be robbed, he’s pretty much defenceless, unless he pelts the robber with some granola.

What still gets me is how real this ship became as the season progressed.

From Sabaton

There’re a few things Vadim expects to see when he lands in Las Vegas. His new teammate holding up a big sign with his name on it, decorated with footballs and pucks and glitter, isn’t one of them.

Am I still prissy about how badly they treated Shippy? Yes. Absolutely.

From LXXXVII

Sidney Crosby isn’t high on the list of people that Vadim expects to see in the hotel bar in Pittsburgh before the Knights game against the Penguins, and yet, there he is. Crosby is wearing a pair of thick rimmed glasses and a hat, presumably as some sort of disguise. It only makes him stand out more.

He also seems to be getting closer, swapping stools whenever Vadim glances away, until they’re sitting elbow to elbow.

Ridiculous Sid is my favorite plot device and he was in full effect in this fic.

From your morning cup

Strictly speaking, there’s never been a hockey player called Tim Horton.

I just liked the way this commands attention when you read it. I think it when you have something so niche, you need the first paragraph to grab your attention, and I think I did well here.

Favorite Closing Lines (5):

From dust in your veins

Then, Geno pulls him into another kiss, desperate, his chest shaking under Sid’s hands and Sid thinks that maybe he won't have to separate them after all.

That he can have this – his heart beating rapid fire in his chest, and Geno’s steadying palms on the muscles of his back, and the ghost of ice above them both.

I love the removable heart AU (not to be confused with the escaping heart AU) because it just works so incredibly well for those sports narratives.

From knight

“You know, it’s actually a pun, because I used to play for the London Knights and-”

“Oh my god, please stop.”

From we were a house on fire

“I want.”

“It’s been years.”

“Want still.”

“...yeah, okay.”

“Like that?”

“Yeah. Just like that.”

I love how deceptively simple this is, with no dialogue tags, but it feels like it packs a lot of punch, cutting through the complexity of their situation.

From descent

The streets of Edmonton turn slick, coated with fallen snow. Daylight is scarce, and cold besides, and you wear a jersey that doesn’t mean much to you and you watch out for the boy that means everything.

At night your curl around Connor in your bed. He always runs hot, burning in your bones and warming you from the inside out.

He presses his mouth to the nape of your neck, and you blink, mind muddled with sleep, and you realize you don’t know which one of you is the one doing the protecting.

Ask me sometime about my thoughts about enforcers and their relationships with star players, and why end up romanticizing them so much.

From armet

“Fleuuuurrrryyyy,” the fans scream, without a hint of mocking, echoing off the concrete of the building, “Fleuuuurrrryyyyyyyy!” and it’s all he can do to smile through his tears, waving at these people who have crucified and martyred him over the years, but have loved him through it all.

His crease hasn’t changed. He pats the pipes, feels them steady beneath his palm, familiar. His teammates are all on the ice now, circling his goal, and he catches sight of Nealer coming forward with the puck. His face is grim and determined, and Flower remembers he’s got something to prove too.

He gives Nealer a sharp nod and crouches. Smiles.

He’s ready.

Flower’s game against the Pens in Vegas was emotionally devastating and I can only imagine how it’ll be when they play in Pittsburgh.

Favorite Lines From Anywhere (6):

From be your spine

The Bruins seem just fine without him, which is just a metaphor for his life, really. He notices the absence of Boston, but Boston is too big to notice he’s gone.

He limits his texts to Tuukka, and eventually they taper off, growing sparser and more impersonal as months go by. It’s understandable. Anton feels the absence of Tuukka like a phantom limb, but Tuukka is too brilliant, too beautiful, to be affected by Anton’s absence.

My first fic of the year was a homage to the journeyman player, the one who isn’t a star anywhere, the one that’s expendable. And this was one of the lines that summarized it pretty well.

From teddy bear

“I just want to be a cool dad, like Bozie! You’re the lame dad, Zach is the big brother figure and Leo is the grumpy grandpa. We all have roles to play!”

Matt bites back his first comment, and the second one. They’re both swearwords.

This whole sequence between Mo and Matt still makes me laugh really really hard.

From foundations

The Sharks are Joe’s team by virtue of wanting him more than anyone else did, but they aren’t his team like they’re Patty’s, who’s left pieces of himself in every crack in the Shark Tank concrete and who wears the jersey with more pride than anyone Joe’s ever known.

This fic hurts more now that Patty got traded.

From heart like a home

Roman is still sprawled across PK’s bed, entirely naked, reading one of PK’s magazines. His tanned skin glows in the soft yellow light of the bedside lamps. The sight never fails to make PK’s mouth go dry. As if sensing his gaze, Roman looks up, arching an elegant eyebrow, a stray curl falling across his forehead.

I want to eventually try to capture the various details of Roman/PK in a longer fic but for now this image of naked Roman will have to do.

From these tornadoes are for you

Bob is standing at the stove, muttering something to himself. He still looks like he did last night, little bolts of lightning racing across his skin, and when he turns around his eyes are still glowing pale in his face. It’s a little disconcerting, but Nick goes with it.

“What are you doing?” Nick asks, walking next to him to look at the pan and wincing. He’s careful not to touch Bob, doesn’t know what it’ll do to him. “Was this supposed to be scrambled eggs?”

I really enjoyed writing the whole scene of Bob releasing his magic in the woods, but what made me happiest to write was the morning after and how all that magic becomes somewhat of a hindrance.

From i still get jealous of your old boyfriends

“Are you telling me that Connor McDavid’s favorite show is My Super Sweet 16?” he asks incredulously. Mitch grins at him.

“Oh, no,” he says and Auston lets out a sigh of relief, “it used to be his favorite show. I think his favorite right now is Extreme Couponing.”

Connor and Extreme Couponing is the greatest love story I’ve written this year.

Fic Goals for 2017: I want to finish off the four WIPs that I didn’t manage to this year. Beyond that, I don’t have any particular expectations. I hope I can continue to enjoy writing in this fandom and that people will continue to enjoy my work.

year in fic review (2016)

#personal #writing

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dubsism · 4 years

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Today’s Movie: The Great Santini

Year of Release: 1979

Stars: Robert Duvall (#8 on my list of favorite actors), Blythe Danner, Michael O’Keefe

Director: Lewis John Carlino

This movie is not on my list of essential films.

NOTE: This installment of Sports Analogies Hidden In Classic Movies is being done as part of something called the The Atticus and Boo Blog-A-Thon being hosted by – Hosted by Taking Up Room. This is an event celebrating the iconic film “To Kill A Mockingbird” and it’s legendary stars, Gregory Peck and the film debut of Robert Duvall. The host of this event never fails to attract top-quality contributions, and despite that…she still lets me participate.

You can see all the contributors to this blog-a-thon here:

Days One and Two

The Story:

youtube

Trained rage without a target; a warrior without a war. There’s no better description of Lt. Col. Wilbur “Bull” Meechum (played by Robert Duvall). “Bull” is a U.S. Marine aviator who is known as “The Great Santini.” The story centers on “Bull” and his family as they move to a Marine Corps base in South Carolina in 1962.

In many ways, “Bull” Meechum is the stereotypical Marine; he’s brash, uncouth, and runs his family just like a military commander. Contrasting him is his wife Lillian (played by Blythe Danner). Lillian is loyal, docile, and yet has a hidden steely resolve capable of both tolerating and somewhat shielding her children from Bull’s temper…which is often fueled by his drinking.

As such, the teen-aged Meechum children Ben (played by Michael O’Keefe) and Mary Anne (played by Mary Jane Persky), have grown accustomed their father’s disciplinarian nature and developed their own mechanism for adapting to and coping with it. There are another daughter and son, but they are rarely seen or mentioned as the movie’s main thrust is the rapidly-changing relationship between Bull and Ben.

The Meechum children.

On top of that, being a military family, they are once again faced with being the “new kids in school.” This is easier for Ben because he is a dominant high-school basketball star. Ben rules the roost on the court, which becomes a problem when he beats his hyper-competitive father in a one-on-one game in the driveway at home.

While Ben is coming into his own as a man, Bull can’t separate the role of father from that of hard-assed Marine aviator. Whether it’s the Marines under his command or his family, Bull issues “direct orders,” calls everyone “sports fan,” and expects to be called “Sir.” In other words, in his mind “The Great Santini” is a hot-shot pilot, a duty and honor bound Marine, an excellent husband and father, and a prince among men…all of which means he does not lose to a kid, even if that kid is his own son.

The tension builds all during the game with Bull and going at each other hard. Bull becomes increasingly abusive the more he’s realizing he’s going to get beat. Bull’s tactics get more and more physical, but Ben doesn’t relent. When Ben finally wins, Bull humiliates him by berating and insulting him, bouncing the ball off his head, and yelling at his other kids and wife for interfering. Later that night, Ben awakes to the sound of his father practicing basketball alone in the driveway.

When Lillian tells Ben not to be angry with his father, it becomes clear the driveway basketball game is a metaphor for Bull’s losing his absolute control over his children as they grow up and he has no idea how to deal with that.

This becomes even more evident when Ben disobeys a “direct order” from Bull about coming to the aid of a young black man named Toomer (played by Stan Shaw). Bull is initially furious, but shows a change of heart when his fellow Marines defend Ben’s actions saying he showed courage and loyalty…two qualities which have the utmost reverence amongst Marines.

One of my favorite examples the Meechum children are understanding the questioning Bull’s totalitarian autocracy when Mary Anne wonders aloud if females are allowed “full” Meechum family status, or if they are relegated to an amoeba-like status as one-celled Meechums.

As I am prone to do, I’m going out of my way not to spoil the end of this film so as those who have not yet seen it may still enjoy to it’s utmost. Personally this is my favorite Robert Duvall performance; he makes Bull Meechum simultaneously lovable and hateable in a film which is far more about people than a story. As a character study, this film is full of quirky yet genuine moments, such as the out-of-nowhere shoulder-punching contest between Bull and their maid (played by Theresa Merritt).

By the end of the film, you can see the faintest glimpses for the waning of Bull’s unwillingness and/or inability to appreciate his son’s sensitive nature and his burgeoning independence. Their relationship remains tenuous to the very end…one in which Bull truly selfless nature is revealed and the Meechum family is forced to come together.

In the end “The Great Santini” is comedic without sacrificing gravitas, sentimental without being corny, and a bona fide tear-jerker that still offers plenty of “feel-good” moments.

The Hidden Sports Analogy:

Today’s analogy is less about a sports analogy and more about a sports blogger analogy. There’s a reason why both Robert Duvall and Michael O’Keefe were nominated for Academy Awards for this film; they nail their respective roles as “Lt. Col. ‘Bull’ Meechum” and his son “Ben.” I am a well-spring of first-hand knowledge on the subject as I have been both.

Like “Ben” I was the son of a career military officer. “Bull” was a Marine; my dad was a Major in the U.S. Air Force. Despite that, they shared the “strict disciplinarian” angle; not exactly a surprising characteristic from a man in uniform. While “Bull” takes that to another and not-all-great level with his overbearing competitive nature, he’s still instilling qualities in his son which will help “Ben” succeed in life. My dad was nowhere near the borderline abusive nature of “Bull,” but they both believed in the order of things, lived by what they believed, and passed those values on the best way they knew how.

In the movie, you never get to see what happens to “Ben” later in life when he has a family of his own. In the sports blogger analogy, nobody will ever know that either since I never had children. But it’s a safe assumption “Ben” becomes a productive member of society; you can see him heading distinctly down that path by the end of the movie; he stands up to “Bull’s” bullying and plays a major role in the welfare and upbringing of his siblings.

This is where the sports blogger analogy comes into play; every time I watch this movie, I can’t help but think I became what “Ben” would have…a guy who can’t help be just like his father, but has enough self-awareness to manage the “not-so-great” parts of his dad’s persona.

First and foremost, I became “Bull” Meechum; there’s a reason why I wrote about being afraid to be “Ted Stryker” from “Airplane!” and why there’s lots of pictures of me around McDonnel-Douglas F-4 Phantoms.

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While I never had kids of my own, I’m surrounded by nieces and nephews, none of whom get treated like they are in a Marine Corps Fighter-Attack wing. I’ve never bounced a basketball off anybody’s head.

The key here is rather simple. Again, “Bull” is a warrior without a war, so he stomps through life like a tyrannosaurus rex made of frustrated aggression, and he has no idea how much he comes off as the world’s largest asshole. “Ben” on the other had is blessed with the sight of the darkest parts of his persona on full display right in front of him. You can see in his eyes during the “basketball” scene that he realizes the darkness that resides in the deepest parts of his being and that he is going to do everything in his power to keep them from manifesting themselves.

Like I said, my dad never came close to the pseudo-lunacy of “Bull,” but having seen this movie early in life meant I was fortunate to get the gift of self-awareness at a point when I could understand the importance of people’s perceptions.

And despite all that…I know I’m still an asshole 🙂

The Moral of the Story:

The first person you need to get to know is you.

Check out Dubsism’s Movies and Blog-A-Thons page for a full schedule of projects past, present, and future!

Got a question, comment, or just want to yell at us? Hit us up at [email protected], @Dubsism on Twitter, or on our Pinterest, Tumblr, Instagram, Snapchat or Facebook pages, and be sure to bookmark Dubsism.com so you don’t miss anything from the most interesting independent sports blog on the web.

Sports Analogies Hidden In Classic Movies – Volume 92: “The Great Santini” Today's Movie: The Great Santini Year of Release: 1979 Stars: Robert Duvall (#8 on my…

#Classic Movies #Movies #Sports Analogies Hidden In Classic Movies

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cassiecantyousee · 6 years

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Golden Calves and Golden Guns

On Valentine’s Day, something all too familiar happened in America: children were killed while at school. And then, some people, many of them Christians, became more worried about their guns than about the lives of the children themselves.

Look, America has a lot of problems. Racism, greed, sexism, pride, you name it, we've got it. But you know what our biggest problem is? Idolatry. And nowhere is this more clear than in discussions about gun control.

Americans, and especially white evangelical Christians, idolize guns.

(Brief aside and disclaimer: I technically AM a white evangelical Christian, and someday I may write a post discussion what that means and how it's been co-opted and how I've been having an extended identity crisis about it for years, but today is not that day. Anyway, moving on.)

I'm sure you're all familiar with the Ten Commandments. They're a pretty big deal. Central tenets of how Christians are supposed to live their lives blah blah blah. No politician/advocate/pundit/lobbyist who calls themselves a Christian is going to come right out and say they don't support the Ten Commandments. The first two are about idolatry. When we think about idols, we’re usually thinking about the second commandment, which talks about not making images of things to worship. For a refresher, please refer to this excellent meme:

We often expect idols to be literal golden statues in our yards, but it doesn’t always look like that. The first commandment reads: "You shall have no other gods before Me." Now, when discussing Christian theology, that doesn't mean that it's cool to worship other gods as long as GOD God is first on the list. It's not "before me" like you're standing in a line, it's "before me" as in "in front of my face at all." If you're talking about importance in your heart, it's not enough for God to just win the contest. God needs to be the only competitor. Anything that you're even allowing on the playing field with God is an idol (sorry for the badly executed sports metaphors, it's Olympic season).

So we're all clear on what idolatry is, yeah? No worshiping things other than God. That's a big no-no.

When pro-gun folks talk, you often hear a lot of the same talking points. "It's our right." "It's in the Constitution." "We need to protect ourselves." “It’s about freedom.”

So let's look at those claims. First of all, "it's our right." Is it? According to who? Not the Bible, certainly. No mentions of guns in there. That would be impossible, since gunpowder wasn't even invented until the 9th century (and invented by the Chinese, not by "Westerners," for the record). Often the full phrase is "it's our right as Americans." Which, come on Christians, really? Americans aren't God. Christians in America aren't more connected to God or somehow more "special" than Christians in other countries. So let's dial back the sense of self-importance, yeah? And the Bible REPEATEDLY tells us to put down our weapons or not fight back. Turn you swords into plowshares and all that (Isaiah 2:4).

Then people bring up the Constitution. Even setting aside the fact that one of the central tenets of the Constitution is that it's modifiable; this is still a crappy argument for a Christian to make. Are you saying the Constitution is infallible? Are you saying a document OTHER THAN THE BIBLE is the indisputable word of God? I sure hope not.

Now on protection. I understand wanting to protect yourself and your family, I do. The world can be a scary place, and "taking back control" definitely feels good. But Christians are supposed to know better. You say you speak for "God-fearing America," but you rely on weapons of death and destruction to protect yourself. You're correct that one of us doesn't trust in the Lord, but I don't think it's me. When a colleague of the Olympic runner and missionary Eric Liddel (of Chariots of Fire fame) was offered a gun to protect himself, Liddel responded: “Don’t touch it! If you have that in your pocket you will depend on it rather than God and I would refuse to travel with you.” Sums it up, honestly.

If this were all, if this were the whole discussion, there would already be a solid case for idolatry.

But.

BUT.

It’s not all. Supposedly Christian pro-gun advocates have gone so much farther than this, and it should deeply horrify us. At the most recent CPAC meeting, only a few days after the tragic events in Parkland, the executive president of the NRA, Wayne LaPierre, made a statement that honestly made me want to throw up. He said that the constitutional right to bear arms “is not bestowed by man, but granted by God to all Americans as our American birthright.” What. The. Actual. Hell. This isn’t right. His worship of guns is obvious. Are Christians really okay with this kind of rhetoric? Should we really be supporting the NRA as they continue to double down on this level of theological perversion and gun worship? I definitely don’t think so.

The Bible teaches us that the wages of sin is death, and we can see this clearly in American gun culture. People would rather hold on to their earthly possessions than allow children to attend school safely.

So let me be perfectly clear: American gun culture is idolatrous. The NRA is an idolatrous organization profiting from the deaths of Americans, many of them children. Christians, why aren't we more upset? Like, honestly, I don't get it. It's so clear. It's so obvious. IT'S KILLING CHILDREN.

Now, I’m not the first person to say any of this. Nor am I the smartest. Christianity Today published an editorial stating that “fear and idolatry are our real gun problem” in 1999, after Columbine. In 2014 Patheos asserted that the idol of fear is at the root of American gun culture. After the massacre in Las Vegas, John J. Thatamanil wrote a great piece of the “American gun cult.” In an episode of one of my favorite podcasts, Impolite Company, Amy Sullivan and Nish Wiseth do a deep dive into the connection between white American evangelicals and guns. And finally, the documentary Armor of Light and the associated movement follows Reverend Rob Schenck, who begins to question if it is really possible to be pro-life and pro-gun. So if you don’t want to listen to me, you can listen to these much smarter people. And thanks for letting me get all this off my chest anyway.

I want to conclude with a personal story. As most of you know, I have been living and working in Florida for the past few years. A month or so ago, I Skyped with a middle school in South Carolina to teach them about the Florida Keys ecosystem, and discuss the effects of climate change and Hurricane Irma. The teachers were great, and the kids paid attention and asked good questions. Overall it was a great day at work. Then I got back to my regular list of tasks, and I essentially forgot about it.

Flash forward to last week, when I turned on NPR on my drive home and heard about what happened in Parkland. I was horrified, sickened, angry, and above all, devastated and sad. As someone who works in Florida, and whose job frequently involves education and outreach, I was knocked emotionally flat. I went to work the next day feeling numb, depressed, and hopeless. And then after lunch, I got a package. It was from the middle school in South Carolina. They had written me an incredibly nice note thanking me for talking with their students, and requesting that we talk again in the future. They had also sent me a school t-shirt, a mug, a key-chain, and other school gear. Friends, I burst into tears at my desk. Our students, and our educators, deserve so much better. In the midst of all my grief, students and teachers who I have never even met in person gave me such a moment of pure hope.

School is supposed to be about learning and growing. Not worrying about whether or not you’ll survive to the bus ride home.

#Parkland #never again #school shooting #gun control

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courage-a-word-of-justice · 7 years

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Tsukigakirei 4 | Kado 4 | Boku no Hero Academia 18 | Grimoire of Zero 4 | Oushitsu Kyoushi Haine 5

Tsukigakirei 4

By the by, episode 5’s title (Kokoro) is a reference to a Natsume Souseki book, just in case you were wondering when we were properly going to get to the Souseki stuff.

That gold dragon case Kotaro has is cool as. I want one…

There’s one scene with a lot of iron poles that I can’t quite decipher in regards to whether it’s CGI or not…(around 4:56 on CR).

Why is it that every time characters do Touristy Things ™, there are slow pans of scenery? It kinda pisses me off ever since it happened in Blue Exorcist…

Selfies are still popular with people, I see. Thought they’d died out already…

Oh gosh. The CGI got so obvious in this, it’s about the same level as cars in Alice to Zouroku (which look hella blocky)!

(when Akane walks out of the store) I know the feel, Akane. I know the feel too well.

Why is getting on the scale such a big deal in Japan? I get it for Akane’s friend who does it here, since girls are conscious about their weight more than boys, and I get it for Atsushi (Boueibu) as Boueibu’s a parody of content targeted at girls, but the scale is in such an obvious place in bath places…

Although the show has passed the Bechdel test already (unlike some of my works…ouch…) I feel that even with the “honesty” thing Tsukigakirei has going, it does kinda fall into a stereotype of “girls talk about boys” if it’s not focussing on the track stuff and that feels kinda disappointing. Girls can be more multifaceted than that, just like boys can.

The girls are eating dango. You can see those in Touken Ranbu all the time.

The CGI people makes this look like (what I know of) Ajin, and that’s bad.

Do you know about that Japanese graffiti where you put two names under an umbrella as a sign of love? Yeah…this is kinda like that.

“I want to talk wih you more” does not equal “I want to be your boyfriend/girlfriend”, kiddos. Remember that.

Kado 4

I’ve noticed between the start of the Sports Festival Arc (BnHA), Kado and Tsukigakirei, I’m yelling “hurry up!” at my screen a lot. Considering how great the latter two are despite their slow pace, I don’t mind those ones being subjected to my yelling, but BnHA is meant to be a fast mover by virtue of its genre. Also, since the three are received in the same 2 day period, it’s inevitable they’ll continue to get comparisons to each other.

29th of what month?

I should’ve known…Shindo would’ve decided to release children and mothers first, because it makes sense. *nods understandingly*

Oh, it’s the 25th of July this stuff started on. Okay. On the subject of Kado, I must say the artstyle of both the adaptional manga and the Railgun one (for after ep 5) don’t do the show any justice. Shindo and Shunina’s faces are too squashed on the Railgun promo image (plus the dot style is weird), while the adaptational manga’s faces for those two don’t look as beautiful as the merch images (exhibit A is the cover page for the linked chapter, the noses don’t look right there). (Then again, I can be very picky about this stuff, considering I am a lover of bishies and I tend to have high standards of “beauty”…)

The manhug was unintentionally suspenseful (when it happened) and funny (after it happened).

I’m not sure if bob girl (forgot her name) should be happy about this, because she sure looks happy.

Why Hanamori, the incompetent one? Then again, there must be a reason why Hanamori hangs around with Shindo and I can understand Shindo’s need for movement.

Wowee, Shindo. I can’t believe you just fired yourself…

They’re focussing on the UN, that’s rare…! I should’ve known it was coming due to Shindo belonging to it, but anime is normally very Japan-centric and never moves from that sphere.

I’ve never been to Haneda (as of this commentary), but what’s up with that dancing girl statue?

It’s quite interesting, not as a fellow person but as a viewer of this show, to note Shindo overworks himself and that he operates off adrenaline. He seems basically superhuman with all his negotiation skills.

A senpai is getting scolded by a kouhai tsundere. Never thought I’d see that in my life. Also, when Saraka thrusts the iPad at Shindo, notice how fluid and fast the motion is. That truly is evidence for how good the CGI is.

“Yahakui zaShunina is hot.” “I love the pattens on the side of Kado.” – *nods* I agree with these people. Two of many reasons why I’m in Kado hell at the moment. However, do note the exact word used for the Kado statement is ステキ, not “love” (suki) but rather “wonderful” (suteki), i.e. “The patterns on the side of Kado are wonderful”, there appears to be an unsubbed statement saying “あれプロジェクションマッピング？” (“Is that projection mapping?”) and the Shunina statement appears to say “Yahakui zaShunina is cool”, rather than saying “he’s hot”, so the “hot” is an implication at best, nonexistent at worst. If you find these words familiar, it’s because I copied them for this post.

Hey, it’s this guy. No wonder the staff needed ep 1.

Google-sensei says plastic is not conductive normally, but since it’s organic, it can be made to be conductive. Hence conductive plastics. Also, NMR appears to be this.

Senbei. After all the big sciency things I’ve noted for this show, senbei is a real laugh.

So basically speaking…it’s kinda like nuclear bombs all over again...

La Luna (White Parasite) was into human stories, and it had a collection of storybooks which gave it inspiration to make the magicians themed after fairytales and itself after a kitsune. The Kado staff applied a similar concept to Shunina and I must say they’ve done it much better than I ever did.

It’s heartbreaking to see the bromance end. Just seeing Hanamori in tears makes me wanna hug him, dangit.

It’s an odd choice to note China was one of the countries highlighted in the explanation of “countries”, as Japan and China don’t have the best relationship in history.

Even if the Japanese fought in self-defence using the JSDF, they wouldn’t be able to fight against international military action…and the Japanese Constitution said they renounced war after World War II…*gulps* (You can really tell I brushed up on 20th century history before getting here, eh?)

Seeing Shunina using a phone is just…*laughs* fabulous! It’s something I never would’ve thought of for La Luna, although I did accidentally stumble across a spoiler for it on Tumblr last week (…so I knew it would happen eventually, but that’s my fault).

What in this dimension and Shunina’s do the government people want with Kanata??? Man, these cliffhangers every week are really getting to me, dangit! (Sidenote: I love, love, love shows that make me want to watch the next ep every week, but simulcasts do give you the unique hell of waiting one week to find out what happens next, assuming you don’t want to get spoiled in the process.)

Boku no Hero Academia 18

“Yaoyorozu’s Creation is too hard to deal with!”

Interesting to note Bakugou only says “Kirishima”. (I noticed it last time but only made a note of it this time.)

I knew this from spoilers already (in fact, Monoma was how I learnt the Japanese word for “to copy” – monomane suru!) but Monoma is a copycat guy. I didn’t know how the Quirk was introduced though, so that was great.

Wowee, Monoma really likes provoking people, eh?

It’s the small things, like the knocks on Kirishima’s head, that make this show a delight to watch.

Small sidenote, but I think Endeavour’s flaming beard is great. As I said, the small things are what makes it a delight to watch…because it’s so unique.

Grimoire of Zero 4

Oh great, this merchant again…

Those apples are so misshapen, I sometimes think they’re pears.

At first I thought the subbers were lazy but then I realised…it’s a montage. D’oh.

“The sky is so blue.” – Yeah, and the rainbows are all rainbowy. (sarcastic)

At least Albus knows where the fish is, LOL.

It’s a bit dizzying to have a sudden cut to a rock, but at least that makes for a unique humour experience. Not ina metaphorical sense, mind you – I almost felt like I was going to be dizzy because of the suddenness of thecut.

I have a bad feeling about Latette, because of what Albus said. It’s kinda like that point in Mulan where they’re singing “A Girl Worth Fighting For” and suddenly, bam! You get my drift?

A burnt doll. See? Mulan de ja vu all over again. The only difference is how the houses are intact this time.

Grimoire of Zero isn’t bad, and I still want to know what happens next in it, but it could aim to be less cliché. The chemistry of the characters really sells it, so maybe the show should learn to focus on that in the future while continuing its worldbuilding and theme exploration (instead of going on about, say, Zero having romantic interest in Mercenary).

Royal Tutor 5

In this one shot of Viktor on a horse, it’s like someone crossed Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure with Napoleon…and that’s funny(!)

Ooh, who’s this guy with the green eyes? He looks a lot like Sebastian (Michaelis, Black Butler) or Pad-kun’s human form (Classicaloid).

Was that green statue CGI? If it was, the CGI was pretty obvious.

I never explained this earlier, but I found the word oushitsu in a Japanese-English dictionary. It means “royal family”, despite the second character meaning “room”.

Ooh. The King. Such pretty, such wow. (I like him.)

Hmph. This sort of plot is what you’d see in something like Masamune-kun’s Revenge. (In fact, I bring that name up because in one of the episodes, a plot like that does indeed happen.) Does this mean this show’s getting sloppy? I hope that’s not the case.

I guess the feeling of defeat setting in means the battle’s over before it’s even begun, eh? So don’t feel down, get motivated, Leonhard…or something like that.

One plus one can equal 11 or window, depending on how you look at it.

Wuh? That’s just your interests, Licht.

Oh! Sachertorte. Didn’t think of that, even though Kai did foreshadow it.

I think all teachers (and then some people who are not teachers, me included) understand that sentiment already, Heine. It’s called the “growth mindset”, to use some buzzwords from a former teacher of mine. (Speaking of “growth mindset”, I got a poster about it from said teacher. That’s why I still remember the concept.)

I think the animators aimed for a determined expression (at “Hurry up and teach me!”) but Leo’s frown makes him look like a sorrowful puppy.

I think this anime would benefit if it had more of that thick line style Leo took on for a second there.

Oh. The palace is CGI in those sky shots. No wonder I thought it was off somehow. The CGI actually makes the palace look realistic. It’s a very Kado way of applying CGI and when Kado is my standard of CGI that I like, that is something this show should be proud of.

Oh! Another foreshadowed loophole I should have seen coming.

There is a strange object in the back that appears to be CGId. It looks like it’s shaped like a fireplace, and it’s a good thing that it follows the Kado application style. (Then again, me noticing weird CGI things is just a habit…)

Well, this is a new interesting development. Hopefully we can get to the truth behind Heine’s past without having the anime be sloppy or cut off in the middle of the developments (like Nanbaka).

#simulcast commentary #tsukigakirei #the royal tutor #Grimoire of Zero #Boku no Hero Academia 2 #Seikai Suru Kado #Chesarka watches Tsukigakirei #kado the right answer #Chesarka watches Kado #Chesarka watches Boku no Hero Academia #Chesarka watches Grimoire of Zero #Chesarka watches Oushitsu Kyoushi Haine

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