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apclyptc · 4 months

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TWO SIDES OF THE SAME COIN PT.2—matt ver.

foreword: please read the first part linked here for this to make any sense! i mean technically u could read it as a stand alone but it’s best read with part one 😇

warnings: nice little makeout sesh, fingering, love bites, praise, lots of praise, erm insert more warnings here

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“i pick… matt.” you spoke.

matt’s eyes widened, but only for a moment. you suddenly felt like a fool, he was one of your best friends, you’d known him forever.

but at the same time, this had been a long time coming. it was going to happen sooner or later, right?

nate’s voice brought you out of your thoughts.

“i was not expecting that! i think this game has been my best idea ever so far.”

you rolled your eyes playfully, “don’t get so ahead of yourself, this game is still stupid. but i will admit that it has been funny.” you turned to matt again, his face unreadable and it made you nervous.

“so uh, which room are we even going in?” matt’s eyes averted from yours. oh god, is he going to let you down gently? was his hand on your thigh just a friendly pat and you’d read into it too much because you wanted him to touch you just once?

you’d simply die if that was the case. was it too late to choose waylon?

nate pointed towards upstairs. oh god.

“pick any room. well maybe not mine, i still have to sleep in it tonight.” nate winked, causing a few of the others to laugh.

“cmon, we’ll only be up there for ten minutes. don’t be ridiculous.” matt shrugged off his friend’s suggestive comment and stood from his chair, signalling you to stand too.

‘we’ll only be up there for ten minutes’. you wondered what you’d get up to if you had longer.

you followed matt up the stairs into what looked like a spare room, and he shut the door.

“nate has really outdone himself this time, don’t you think?” matt asked, as if he was putting himself off of an inevitable and awkward conversation.

“yeah… it almost makes me scared to think he’ll try to one-up this next time.” you responded. now that you were up here alone, you were realising the errors of your ways and you desperately wished that ten minutes would be over as quick as it started.

“listen, y/n. we’ve been friends for a long time now, so i understand if you want to just sit here and wait out the ten minutes.” he explained.

the way he worded it made it seem like he didn’t want to just sit here, but he was okay with it if you were.

surely not…

“we could do that,” you began, mentally noting that his face dropped ever so slightly, “or maybe we could… never mind.” you realised half way through your reply that you couldn’t bear to hear yourself say the words to him.

but matt wasn’t going to let that happen, not now, knowing that maybe what he was feeling was reciprocated.

“we could what?” he stepped closer to you, the room feeling smaller than it was when you first walked in.

“it doesn’t matter, it was stupid.” your breath hitched in your throat, he was getting closer and closer to you until there was barely any space left between you.

“tell me. i just want to hear you say it, once.” matt’s hand came up to rest on the side of your neck, the hand that was adding pressure to your thigh not long ago.

“i mean, it’s just a game, right? so we could… just…” you trailed off as his lips came into contact with yours. it was a soft, slow kiss, that melted your brain into mush.

“this isn’t just a game to me.” he spoke before reconnecting his lips to yours. soft and slow was no longer how your kiss could be described. no, this time it was desperate, charged, with clanging teeth and roaming hands.

you couldn’t believe one silly card game could put you in such a position.

matt walked you to the edge of the bed, sitting both of you down and placing his hand back on your thigh. you pressed them together, trying to distract yourself from the arousal that was no doubt pooling underneath your skirt.

pulling away from you, he mumbled, “i was hoping you felt the same way.”

the needy expression on your face was more than enough of an indicator, but if there was any doubt in his mind, it was instantly quelled when you took his hand and let him touch the dampness of your underwear. he sighed with want, dragging his fingers along the wet spot.

“please, we don’t have long.” you pleaded, and who was he to deny you?

tugging the waistband of your panties down your legs, he admired the glistening of your pussy, begging to be touched.

“so pretty.” a single finger swiped at your core, and you let out a short breath.

matt slowly increased his pace, stroking up and down at your leaking cunt, as if mesmerised by it.

truth be told, he couldn’t believe such a thing was happening. he’d had only the smallest of feelings for you when you were younger, but they had quickly blossomed into something much more, or rather they had torpedoed into a carnal desire for you once you had traded hoodies for tube tops.

he couldn’t control his urges for you any more than you could.

“matt,” you pleaded again, aching for more, “please.”

matt could cum solely from the sounds escaping your throat alone, but he had decided to use his ten minutes to make you feel good rather than himself.

using his fingers already coated in your slick, he pushed them inside you. the moan you let out had surprised the both of you, and you quickly covered your mouth with your hand, letting your other stabilise yourself on his shoulder.

“keep quiet, you don’t want everyone downstairs to hear, do you?” he spoke softly, and you weren’t sure if he actually wanted an answer to his question, though you weren’t in any position to answer. you were too focused on muffling your moans with your hand.

just like he had done downstairs, matt attached his lips to your neck, leaving another bite next to the other, this one darker than the first.

he pulled his head back to admire his work.

“i’d love to cover you in these,” he continued thrusting his fingers into you, “they suit you.”

you felt a twang in your stomach.

“you, fuck, you should leave them in places where no one can see but you.” you panted, struggling to speak without whining expletives.

“yeah? you want that?” matt glanced down at where his hand connected with your pussy, and used his thumb to touch your clit.

“ohhh fuck, yes i want that, keep doing that.” you felt yourself already slipping over the edge, getting closer and closer to sweet release.

“knock knock!” nate’s voice taunted from outside the room as he thudded on the door, “times up!”

you instantly felt embarrassed. did he hear all of that?

“i guess we weren’t quick enough.” matt pulled his fingers out of you.

“yeah i guess no-” your words were cut short by matt sticking the fingers that were just inside of you, into your mouth.

“clean my fingers for me, would you? i got them all messy.” he smirked at the implications of his words.

you did as you were told and licked your own arousal off his hand, feeling your cunt clench.

“there’s a good girl.”

straightening yourself out, you opened the door to a beaming nate.

“so? did you keep my sheets clean?” he asked.

“shut up, dude. we didn’t even do anything.” matt denied, walking past nate and back downstairs with you to the others.

nate followed behind, “then how come y/n has another hickey?”

like a deer in headlights, you stopped in your tracks.

“no comment.”

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a/n oh my god this is so so so ass. this is what i get for getting drunk instead of updating and having to rush writing this bc everyone’s waiting.

regardless, i hope it was worth the wait! now all i have to do is write the whole chris chapter and pray it doesn’t come out as terribly as this

bye….

#matt sturniolo #matt sturniolo x reader #sturniolo triplets #the sturniolo triplets #matt sturniolo imagine #matt sturniolo oneshot #matt sturniolo smut #matthew sturniolo #chris sturniolo imagine #chris sturniolo x reader #christopher sturniolo #nick sturniolo #chris sturniolo oneshot #chris sturniolo smut

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pupcuck · 4 months

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WASTE ME 3

ft. leon s. kennedy x gn!reader

tags. rape/non-con, painal, vomit like a lot of it, emotional abuse

a/n. so messy n rushed cuz i deleted it like 5 times n rewrote it over n over 😭 sorry it’s so flat from leon’s side but omg rbs n feedback appreciated :3 unedited so ignore typos please :3 leon is um. idk I think I changed his character drastically from the last parts but whatever!!! if u see me using shit from old fics ignore it ong

tumblr has started to remove fics that use tw non-con, tw incest and any nsfw tags in general. for this reason, as i’d like my fic to appear in the tags so i can have the same reach as other authors, please understand that this fic contains dark content under the cut. reading this comes at your own risk.

one / two

“Can you put that away? I can’t concentrate.” Leon’s hands tighten their grip on the wheel, agitation creeps into his voice as you push the visor back into its place, then very promptly - when you think he’s not looking - pull it back down for the umpteenth time to give yourself a once over. “Cut it out.”

“Sorry.” You say quickly, as if the words have been festering in your mouth for a while now.

“Hey, you don’t have to come.” You do, you have to or I'm in deep shit. I bet a couple hundred on this. A date, that is. In all the years he’s known his friends, not once has he brought a date to their annual New Year’s party. “We’re not too far from your house, I can turn the car around.”

“No,” You shake your head, “No, I want to come with you.”

Leon isn’t sure if he wants you to come with him, if he’s ready for the barrage of questions and insults, namely from Claire. He’s taking you ‘cause there’s no one else, and to be quite frank, he considered hiring an escort before he even thought of you. The thing is, you’ve gotten too comfortable around him. Using pet names, babe and baby, so Leon tried to put some distance between the two of you. ‘Cause that made him queasy. You’re not dating. He’s thirty-seven years old, there’s no room in his life to date, you don’t date at that age. You fuck and get it over with.

“I don’t know what you’re nervous about,” Leon hums, he turns the radio down, “You look nice.” He expects you to fawn over him, throw yourself into his lap ‘cause he said you don’t look bad. That’s what you’re like, right? Doesn’t take a whole lot to get your tail wagging.

“Don’t say that.” The tone in which you speak is new, Leon hasn’t heard that before. Not been on the receiving end of any mood swings you’re bound to have. You have the emotional capacity of a toddler - no form of regulation over any of your thoughts and feelings, words slip past your lips like you’ve got the shits. Verbally speaking.

“What?” He asks, dumbfounded by the total switch.

“I don’t like it… I don’t like when you say things like that, it feels like you're lying.” And he’s not. That might be the first time he’s ever told you the truth so directly.

“I’m not, why would I lie about that?” Oh, so all of a sudden you’ve managed to grasp the concept of self respect? Talking back to him and shit. You know, Leon’s kinda proud of you. One of you had to break free from the binds of your swaddling cloth sooner or later. One of you has to cut ties, and it sure as hell won’t be him. It’s not that you’ve grown on him, instead you’ve torn open his flesh and slipped between the cracks in his ribs. Nestled into his chest cavity and made it your home. Or he’s just real lonely.

“I’m not stupid, Leon.”

“I never said you were stupid.”

“You’re looking at me like I’m stupid.”

“What? No, I’m not. I’m looking straight ahead, ‘cause I’m driving?”

“Yeah? Well, keep looking at the road.” You huff through your nostrils, and it’s absurd, the shit you come up with. All it does is show your age. He’s fucking a kid, one that can’t even drink yet.

Leon does just that, neither of you utter a word for the remainder of the journey. When he gets out, you catch up with him, take his arm in yours as if it belongs to you, he’d rather you take his heart. So all the tenderness would be zapped from his system. Leon’s love comes in the shape of your casket, it comes with the engravings on your tombstone, empty and cadaverous. It’s not enough for you, you don’t know that, but he does. Leon’s a weeping sore of a man, the kind that won’t go away, not with over-the-counter pills, not the type that gets drained, not even antibiotics could help him. You’re licking his wounds and getting nothing from it, nothing but a mouthful of infectious pus.

“Leon— Oh.” The smile on Claire’s face drops as quick as it came, her forehead creases, and he’d like to tell her pretty girls shouldn’t frown so hard, they’ll get wrinkles, but she’d have his head. Tell him that it’s a natural progression, and that he’s looking a little rough these days, he should try keto. Leon has been on keto most his life if dick counts as meat.

He wraps an arm around your shoulder, draws you closer, smiling with all his teeth to show Claire that he really likes you when he really doesn’t. Well, he does, it’s just complicated. “Claire.” Leon greets with a nod of his head, he introduces you despite the uneasiness, then guides you to sit on an unoccupied seat beside Rebecca, his hand on your lower back.

From the corner of his eye, Leon watches you shift in your seat as Claire asks him if this is a thing now - cherry picking. If he’s going through a midlife crisis, and that she knows a guy who knows a girl who knows a good shrink, one that keeps real quiet. Then their conversation gets derailed and she begins to talk about Simone de Beauvoir, wrote a book called The Second Sex apparently, Claire reveres it, and Leon is confused on how they got to here.

Hunnigan argues that The Second Sex others women of colour very brashly, and it’s not quite argumentative because Hunnigan talks factually, like everything she says is right, and it usually is. It’s impressive how often she teeters on a condescending edge. She says Claire should read more on intersectionality, and Claire nods, bats her lashes ‘cause she listens to pretty ladies well. The only intersection Leon knows of is a road junction— he wonders how you’re doing with Rebecca, so he excuses himself from the conversation. Hunnigan tells him that he wasn’t included in the first place.

When he catches sight of you, you’re sitting alone, picking at whatever piece of food you can get, leg bouncing so hard the table does too. Chris grabs his arm and drags his arm towards Jill, and then it’s Sherry, who is always a joy, and then Ashley, and her dad who Leon, for some reason, thought was in a wheelchair. He gets to you a full forty minutes later.

“Woah, slow down, are you okay?” Leon takes your wrist in his, wonders how to word this correctly, without you taking any offence. “You’re eating a lot.” Shit. Not the best opener.

“I am not.” There’s a droplet of sweat trickling down the column of your neck, he wipes it with his thumb. “Am I? Did you notice? Oh my gosh, you so did. Did anyone else notice? Why did you take so long? I didn’t know what to do, Leon. Was I supposed to say anything? Was I meant to come with you?”

“Listen, calm down, god, no— just, I told you to sit here, didn’t I?”

“Yeah,” You nod, tremors making your hands unsteady as you take his. “I think I should go.”

“What?” Leon’s face twists, “I gotta stay, Sherry wants me to stay, I haven’t seen her in a long time.”

You bristle at this, shoulders slumping, “No, I don’t need you to drop me, I can just get a cab back, I just feel a little out of place, Leon. Like, I know no one even knows my name, but I just feel like they’re all looking at me and talking about me and I feel so stupid.”

He gets it, truly. “You should stay.” Leon’s fingers intertwine with yours, though it’s nothing gentle, it’s to keep you under lock and key. A threat of sorts.

“Leon, I don’t really, like, I’m just sitting here eating on my own, I look like a freak.” You said it, not him.

“You could try to engage, y’know?” And it’s so hypocritical for him to say, ‘cause Leon needs a drink or five before he can even stomach talking to the older Redfield. Not that Chris is a bad guy, he’s just so intensely stupid sometimes.

“Leon,” You take your hand back, and it’s the first time you’ve denied him of anything, “I don’t think they really care if I’m here or not, I’m going home.” It’s not a question, not Leon, may I go home now, pretty please? It’s an assertion, you’re firm in your wants, and he hates it. You’re stepping out of line.

So Leon does what he does best, he fucks it up. Back to square one with your blood caked beneath his fingernails and your tears salty on his tongue. ‘Cause it doesn’t matter what you want, it hasn’t mattered before so why would it matter now? He cradles the back of your head when it knocks against the bathroom stall, tips it forward so he can kiss you sweetly. And you’re a sucker for it, hands fisting at the fabric of his dress shirt like a baby. When you’re bare, he kneels down, spreads you apart, and you’re so wet there’s slick dripping down your ass crack. Embarrassing how fast you get it on for him, and Leon’s here with a semi you could barely class as a semi. Though that’s more of a Leon problem.

The nip to your clit makes you gasp, you tangle your fingers in his hair, and he likes that. Leon presses his nose to it, laps at the slick to clean you up, but he’s only getting you messier. He spreads your ass to lick deeper into your hole, then his hand leaves so his middle and forefinger can keep your cushioned lips open, teeth scraping over your slippery folds. Leon’s mouth is moving on autopilot, his brain is working overtime, what’s he gonna do? How can he make you stay? Right, right, right, that’s gotta be it. When Leon pulls away with a pop! you whine, he’s always kind enough to let you cum. Not this time.

“Hold on, kid,” Leon murmurs, spins you around and you brace yourself against the walls of the cubicle automatically. They seem paper thin. He keeps a hand on your hip, the other unbuckling his belt with a clink as he lowers his jeans to slip out his cock that hardens only at the thought of taking you this way. You flail when he pushes into your tighter hole. The puffy rim is wet with your arousal, not wet enough to take cock. He wasn’t even merciful enough to spit on it.

“No, no, oh god, Leon, no, I’m gonna die, Leon, you’ll kill me.” Your bones crack out of place with how hard you struggle against him, limbs angled oddly, and he hates it. No doesn’t sound right coming from you. It’s a tough one, breaching your asshole, getting past the dryness.

You clench so hard, try to push him out, he kisses the nape of your neck, the tackiness of sweat salty on his lips. “Stop runnin’ from it, I’ve got you.”

“Please— Please, please, Leon,” Your cheek is squashed against the cubicle door, nails scratching at it till they crack and split. He reaches round to cover your mouth, you’re getting too loud. There’s snot and tears and spit covering his palm, but it’s alright. Worth it.

“Hey, hey, hey, c’mon do it for me. You can do it for me, can’t you? You’re not a baby.” Leon’s teeth tug on your earlobe, he manages to bury himself to the hilt in your ass. A miracle really, ‘cause he can barely move an inch back or forth.

You’re gasping for breath, knees buckling despite him supporting your weight. The pain must be bad, he knows what it’s like, that sickeningly raw pain. Feels like it’s in your guts, stirring up all the acid, tangling your intestines. But he got over it, and you got over it once upon a time. So you can do it, he knows you can.

For a minute, he thinks you stop breathing, you slump over and he struggles to hold you up, then he gets ahold of you. You’re dry heaving, retching as you claw at the cubicle, he draws his hips back and you whimper brokenly into his palm. There’s an abundance of resistance, but Leon’s strong enough to push past it, his strokes are shallow - can’t find it in himself to fuck you hard and deep. Well, Leon would, but it’s too much effort.

There’s no letting up, you’re stubborn today, his free hand reaches round to tweak your nipple, then it trails down your body, cups your cunt and parts your fold to thumb your swollen clit. It does little to lessen the ache, the burn, but Leon hopes you’ll loosen up. “Hey, you got it, jus’ focus on my fingers, okay?”

“Okay, Leon,” You get out through ragged breaths, chest rising up and down unevenly as you try to regain some sort of consciousness, he's raped you into delirium. Leon grits his teeth, that word is harsh on his ears still. “Okay… I’ll try, I’ll try… I’m trying—“

“I know you are,” Leon talks you through it, talks you through rape unlike the first time, so that must mean something, give him some kind of credit. “I know it hurts, it’ll get better, yeah? I promise.”

“I can’t breathe— Leon, I can’t-“ Your hands press down on your stomach, then your chest, heart beating wildly, to the point where he thinks he can hear it.

“You can breathe, ‘cause you’re talking to me right now, aren’t you?” He asks, “Remember what you said to me? You said I could do this.”

“I know… I know, Leon, I’m really sorry— God, it hurts so bad.” Another sob is muffled into his wet palm.

“I know, but you said you would do it for me, didn’t you?”

“Yes, Leon, I’m sorry, I did— I did.” You shiver, head jerking to the side as he pulls back, then slams his hips back into you - so hard your knees knock against the cubicle. The pressure on your clit alleviates nothing it seems, even when he presses a little harder, you continue to kick and squirm.

“Just a little more, yeah?” Leon tells you, he kisses your shoulder for good measure, starts up a rhythmic pace that rewards him with a squeaky yelp each time he thrusts. You’re uncomfortably tight, and it’s pretty dry, but Leon makes do, most nights his fist is drier.

Sweat prickles at your delicate skin, and your body goes rigid when he cums, he jams himself so far into you Leon fears he might have trouble pulling out. Dick might come off clean. He smooths a hand down your spine, “You’re okay.” Leon says, and it’s more of an order than anything else.

He takes your clothes from where they’re hung on the single hook, he might be a serial rapist, but he’s a gentleman. Serial might be a stretch, Leon’s not quite at that point yet, and he doesn’t intend to be. But he might be your serial rapist, ‘cause it’s happened multiple times and all.

Your gait is off, more so than last time, taking shuddering breaths as you clutch at his arm. Leon doesn’t know what to say, he leads you out the back, ‘cause Claire will look him in the eye and know what he’s done. Step by step, you wobble towards the door to the passenger seat, crumpling against it as you fumble with the handle.

“Let me do it,” Leon grows impatient, steps forward, you jump out of your skin, snapping out of your haze as you manage to open the door. Your teeth are chattering, and you’re clammy, ribs rattling noisily when you cough. He wonders if he’s really done it now, fucked over his chance with you of all people.

Every time there’s a bump in the road, you wince visibly, nails digging into the leather of his seat to try and conceal any noise leakage. “Leon?”

He stops at a red light, turns to you in surprise, didn’t think you were capable of speaking right now. “Yeah?”

“Do you think she’s cute? The one who dresses like Jackie O?” Of course it’s some insecure shit like that, the first thing you say to break the silence post-rape is a question about whether or not he likes a girl.

“Ashley’s pretty.” Leon answers, face that launched a thousand ships - or a thousand Molotov cocktails, right at him actually, by the hands of religious zealots. He thinks that if it weren’t for a lot of things, they could’ve worked out, and maybe he wouldn’t have resorted to getting drunk and raping college kids in alleys.

“Leon, I think I’m gonna throw up.” Your voice is low, shaky, rolling down the window and letting the chill hit your warm face.

“I can pull over.” Leon offers, he can’t bother to go through with dry cleaning. Rather it come out on the side of the road than his carpets.

“No, never mind, I’m fine.” You go quiet again, then, “What about the big guy, do you like him?”

“What?” He looks like he’s constipated, the idea of Chris and him is an interesting one that’s never crossed his mind. Sure, he’s objectively attractive, but he’s so hardheaded it pisses Leon off. “No, well, yeah, I like him ‘cause he’s my friend.”

“Yeah, that’s what I’m asking.” You lie, and he knows you’re lying, because you’re you, and he knows you. Predictable little thing. “Okay, so, what about the girl you were talking to at the beginning when we came in. Ponytail, red jacket.”

“God, no, Claire’s just my friend.”

“Yeah, I know, Leon. I’m asking if, like, you like her. As a friend. I just want to know more about you.” Liar, he indulges you anyway. He owes you one, and maybe money for hospital bills.

“She’s my best friend,” Leon claims, she might not think of him that way, but Leon certainly thinks of Claire that way. “Of course I like her, I love her.”

“Then who was the lady with glasses? The tall one?” You peer at him hesitantly, the dark obscures much of your face from him, but he sees your wide eyes.

“Hunnigan? Yeah, she’s hot, I don’t want her though.” Too brash, his tongue slipped. It’s more that she doesn’t want him. Leon wouldn’t tell you that though. He’s patient for you, lets you ask questions that reek of insecurity before he’s pulling up on his drive.

“I don’t want to take them off,” You’re quick to stop his wandering hands, eyes going foggy and faraway when he tries to get you out of your underwear, “Please, Leon.” There’s blood smeared on the backs of your thighs that Leon pretends not to notice.

And because he’s so kind, and reeling with guilt from the whole public bathroom sodomy situation, Leon abides. “You sure?”

“Yeah, I’m sure, I’ll just get you off.” You insist, squeezing his half-hearted boner, thumbing the tip, cupping his balls, all the stuff he’s taught you to do. He might not get it up, ‘cause he’s had a drink, and ‘cause he’s still spent from earlier. Rape is no joke, shit takes a lot of effort, fucking a dry hole is not as pleasing as bootcamp made it seem.

Your mouth is warm on his cock, you lick along the vein on his underside, kiss the tip sweetly like you love him - it’s not like ‘cause you do love him. The head rests weighty on your tongue, you take half of him easily. You’re not the best at sucking dick, so he doesn’t expect much from you, expectations already reduced to zero, but Leon tilts his head back with a groan when you begin to bob your head. Look at that, you’ve gotten better.

Really, he should’ve known, seen all the signs. The tell-tale bulge in your throat, something foreign, not his dick ‘cause shits not the big. You felt sick in the car, he’d seen you gag over the toilet bowl after he came inside you. Leon’s reflexes are good, but not good enough. When you finally make it to the balls, eyes wet with unshed tears as he pushes your limits, nose in his crotch— you go to raise your head, he makes the mistake of pushing you back down. Biggest mistake of his life. And Leon has made a lot of mistakes.

He’s had monster after monster spew their god knows what on him. Been knee-deep in sewers, he’s been pissed on by military men for fuck’s sake. Somehow, this tops it off. You sicking up hors d'oeuvres on his lap. Vomit on his dick is the worst feeling Leon’s felt in quite a while. He’d rather break his ribs again and again and again and again. Over and over. Have them caved in by a metal pipe.

You lurch backwards, vomit caked around your mouth, coating his cock, dripping down your chin. God, he might add to the mess, but Leon’s got a strong enough stomach to hold it. Happy New Year! God Bless America. Isn’t this just the dream?

“Oh my god,” You gasp, wipe at your mouth drearily with your bare arm, breathing picking up as you stagger away from him, “God, no, no, no.”

He blinks at you, and you stare at him shell-shocked. Leon inhales, counts to ten, he's been through worse. He has. Honest. What’s a little puke on his cock going to do?

“I’m sorry, Leon, I’m so sorry, oh my gosh, Leon, I’m so sorry, what do I do?” You fumble and use his blanket to wipe him clean, doing a shit job as he anticipated. “I can do it, I can do it, I can get you off, I’m sorry, please, let me make it up to you, Leon.” Then you’re clocking in for your shift, sloppy and hurried all at once as you suck him off, only for a moment- then a wave of nausea hits and a second bout of puke is spewed on his lap, waterlogging his sheets as it trickles down his thighs. Fuck, it’s fucking gross. Made the place into a biohazard.

“Hey, c’mon—“

“No, no, Leon,” You retch, spit bubbling in the back of your throat as you shake your head in wild refusal, “I can do it, please, please,” He feels you swallow around him, tight little throat that’s only got space for vomit and not his cock, ‘cause it’s pushed out of your mouth as you gag and drip liquified party food. Your head pops back up, dabbing at the stickiness that covers the bottom half of your face to no avail.

“Kid.” Leon grabs you by your hair, straightens you up so you’re facing him, drool pooling in your mouth, tongue heavy as you’re racked with full body shivers to warn you of more. This time you make it to the bathroom, courtesy of Leon, there’s vomit tracked down his hall, on the rug Sherry bought him to brighten up his boring bedroom. “Let it all out,” He’s trying his best to be comforting, rubbing your back as your head hangs limp in the toilet bowl till there’s nothing but bile and spit.

Leon lets you shower first, ‘cause y’know, he loves sitting around soaked in barf. Really lets it marinate. He watches your figure through the foggy glass, barely able to keep yourself up, leaning against the wall when you have to wash anything from the waist below. God, he fucked you up. Maybe the vomit bath is more than deserved. He feels it crust over on his dick and itches.

“Are you okay now?” Leon mumbles, his body takes on your curled up shape, knows you could use the comfort.

The mattress in his room has been stripped bare, sheets put on a double spin in the washing machine. For now, the two of you lay close in the guest room that’s been unused since he moved in. “I’m okay.” You whisper, placing your hand over his when he wraps his arm around you. He thinks you’ve fallen asleep going by how still you are. “Leon?”

He wonders if it’s worth pretending to be asleep, can’t lie that he forgives you for that, then any ounce of initial hostility ebbs away and he feels white, hot guilt. “Yeah?”

“Before I met you, I would think of all this stupid shit, like I wanted to get ran over so people would care about me, or they’d feel bad for me, and then I stopped thinkin’ like that when we started dating.” You’re not dating him. Leon’s unsure on how to make that explicitly clear. “But, then, I started thinking like that again. ‘Cause I thought I wanted you to rape me ‘cause I thought you liked me, I wouldn’t mind if you liked me, I would let you do anything to me. I thought that you’d feel bad and take care of me after but you don’t, you just act like it didn’t happen.”

Leon closes his eyes, lashes fluttering on the skin of your back, the light tickle is slight enough as to not alarm you. He listens to you, but he doesn’t know what to think, what to say, it’s a lot.

“I only want you to rape me if you like me, but you hate me.” And that’s so far from the truth, Leon doesn’t hate you, and he doesn’t love you, but he does want you. For reasons he can’t explain himself. “I just, I don’t want you to rape me ‘cause you hate me, I want you to hold my hand after and sometimes I want you to kiss me.”

“So if I start liking you, I can do it?” Grown fucking man and he can’t say rape out loud. Leon wonders why it comes so naturally to you, how you can talk so openly about topics he can’t stomach despite being the perpetrator of said topic.

“Yeah, I just want you to like me, Leon.” You don’t beg, it’s pleading, thumb stroking over his knuckles.

“I’ll try.” Leon gives his oath, he’s a bad person he thinks. Not ‘cause of his mom, not ‘cause of dad, not ‘cause of all the shit back in Raccoon City, not ‘cause of bootcamp— none of it. It’s ’cause he feels like it, and he does it to you on purpose, and Leon knows that, but he can’t fix it. “I’ll try.” He repeats to himself, knowing very well his attempt will fall flat.

#leon s kennedy x you #leon kennedy x you #leon s kennedy x reader #leon s kennedy smut #leon kennedy imagine #leon kennedy x reader #leon kennedy smut #resident evil x reader #resident evil smut

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hamletteprinceofdenmark · 2 months

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Transcript of Shelby's Video:

CW: Abuse

:readmore:

Hello! I don't know if you can even hear it, I put on, like, light jazz in the background because it seemed awkward being quiet, but I don't think you can hear it, so I'm just gonna turn it off. Um, hello! Um, welcome! We are in emote only because I'm just gonna be talking today, and then I'm gonna go! I'm gonna go!

Um, yeah, it was very, very low. There's, there's no need. I just, it felt weird leaving you in silence, but I'm here, so — Hello! Um, I want to talk about something today that, um, very nervous. I feel sweaty. I had a sweater on, I had to take it off. Um, I'm gonna try and just, I wrote down pretty much everything I think that I want to say to keep track of, sort of all the points that I want to make sure I don't forget anything. So I will be reading from something, um, a good portion of the time, but not 100 percent of the time. Um, and I just wanted to make sure I got all of my thoughts down in words ahead of time. I'm, I really like writing down my thoughts. So I did that.

Um, oh, hold on. Can I turn ads off? I think that maybe we turn ads off today. How do I make that happen for just today? Um. Shoulda had that already. I shoulda had that already. I actually don't even know how to make that happen. You know what? That's just gonna have to be that way. I'm so sorry.

Um. I'm all good. Um, yeah, okay. Today's just gonna be talking. Uh, I'm just gonna start reading from what I wrote, and go from there.

I have a really big coffee, I'm gonna take a swig. And I have my water, and I'm gonna take a swig of that.

I have always liked telling my different experiences that I've had, um, in dating because it feels important to me to share what I've learned and maybe help other people to not make the same mistakes that I have before. I'm 30. I've dated a lot. I've gone on a lot of dates. I keep trying, um, and it's unfortunate that a lot of my dating history, uh, there were a lot of bad people that tried to manipulate or control me, um, but that's not to say that every person that I've dated has treated me poorly. Um, some people just weren't the right people.

Um, and speaking out about my bad experiences has never felt as important as it does right now because silence has always brought me peace. And this time it feels like my silence is not keeping my peace. It's only keeping somebody else's peace. Um, and I never thought that I could be the kind of person to end up in a situation like I did. I'd never thought that could happen to me.

And so for me, this is important because it could help anybody else see the signs sooner than I did. Um, or hopefully avoid a similar situation entirely. Because the, the truth is it was dangerous. Um, there were a lot of things wrong in this relationship that, um, I endured some pretty terrible treatment. Um, and I might touch on some things here and there about that. But, um, if I feel like it's important to the overall context. But what I want to stay focused on is this specific issue, um, and the things that happened matter-of-factly and the things that people saw and witnessed in our circle.

Um, it took me 10 months after to heal. And I spoke with multiple therapists and tried different forms of therapy. Um, I tried somatic therapy. That one was actually really good for me. Um, because that one actually helped me release a lot of, um, built up anger I was having over the last year. Um, but the anger that I was feeling was for myself because, um, I felt like I should have known better.

I felt so stupid at myself for, um, sort of just staying through all of this. Um, and I shared my story with a lot of friends after I started talking to therapists and I was like "So, this thing happened ... and I wasn't really sure ... It just seems weird now to me looking back," and all of them told me exactly what was happening in the words that I was too afraid to use.

Um, and I was being hurt in my last relationship. And it took me all of that time to see it through that lens. Um, I even posted an anonymous story to Reddit that I have now deleted with an anonymous account. But in posting that, I found a dozen other stories that were exactly like mine, exactly the same way. Um, and all of the comments said exactly the same thing.

Um, and I was so mad at myself because I was lying to, um, at a certain point to protect this person, because I knew that if I told my friends the truth, it'd make him look really bad. Um, I didn't think that I would cry and I practiced saying all of this and I didn't cry, but it's easier to practice it when no one is listening.

Um, but he always cared more about how it looked and that was really important, not what was true. Um, and it was really subtle. When I hear about, um, when I hear about physical abuse, I think of hitting. I think of hitting and punching, um, so I thought that this wasn't violent enough, um, to be abuse. Uh, I thought that it was just like a constant accident that he kept hurting me. Um, but he's not hitting me and it didn't start as something that he did to hurt me.

Uh, he had this habit of biting, which is so weird to me now, but he said that he had had this habit since he was a kid. And even his mom said that that was true. And he said it was just affectionate and that that might have been — I mean, I think that that might have been true, maybe, at the start, but I also feel that I have good reason to believe that every part of it was a lie, but that's just my personal opinion, um, and I had no problem with just biting, that isn't even the most uncommon thing, um, but he did mention something early that I should have taken as a red flag, um, and he wanted to make sure that I was okay with him biting me because he didn't want me to come back later and say that he abused me. Which I thought was really weird considering he had never hurt me before. And so why would I call it abuse? And why was he thinking about that? And I thought he was being sweet, checking on me to make sure that I was still comfortable. Um, but of course I was because he hadn't hurt me. And why would I think he ever would?

Um, and then he did, for the first time, by accident, uh, and I don't specifically remember the actual first time that he bit me too hard by accident, because I didn't think that it would be significant, um, I thought that it would only happen once, and he started biting me more and more over a period of time, sort of throughout the whole relationship, and accidents of him biting too hard and really hurting me happened more and more frequently, um, but he always seemed genuinely sorry, and he decided that he didn't want to keep accidentally hurting me, um, so we were gonna use a safe word, um, so he could learn where my limit was, where my pain tolerance ended.

Uh, and saying that out loud now doesn't sound — Like, that's not very sound logic. Um, but at the time, I thought he cared about not hurting me. But in reality, it's like, why are you biting so hard? And why do you have to bite so hard? And it shouldn't be that hard of a problem to stop. Um, that shouldn't be that hard.

And he disguised it as this really quirky part of our relationship and was so comfortable sharing it with his friends to the point that he would do it in front of them. He thought it was this really funny story to tell and a good bit to take my arm and bite me in front of everybody until I literally shout in pain. Um, and then I have to laugh it off because I'm so embarrassed and I don't want to cause a scene in front of all of our friends and I'm sure everyone was a little bit uncomfortable, but as long as I was saying that it was fine, nobody really felt like they needed to be concerned and that's not anybody's fault because I was lying. I was lying and it wasn't fine because I would go home later and I'd tell him how uncomfortable I was. How much I didn't like being hurt all the time and I needed him to really stop biting so hard. I didn't like it and I tried telling him over and over again because he wasn't actually trying at all to not hurt me, um, but he said he would try, at first, and then he started saying things like it was my pain tolerance that was too low, or I'm exaggerating how much it actually hurts. He's not even biting that hard. I'm, I'm being dramatic. Um, but his biting escalated to a point where I was covered in bruises all over my arms and they hurt and he would poke at them for fun. And he even felt so comfortable showing off my bruises that he had caused to our friends because he would bite me so hard by accident, "by accident." He would even joke that it looked like he abused me. Um, and eventually he did acknowledge how bad it looked that I was covered in bruises all the time. So he stopped, um, biting my arms as often. And he started biting my legs instead. Um, and it was in the last couple of months of the relationship that every time he bit me, it was until I needed to use this safe word. Um, it had become his benchmark for when to stop.

Only once I was definitely hurt, um, which meant I was being hurt every single day, um, multiple times a day, uh, for all of the days that we spent together in person. And when I asked him to stop again, this time he said, "This is who he is. He isn't going to change." Those were his words. And I remember a lot of, specifically his words about certain things, especially at the end.

Um, because I'm good at remembering words and especially his wording. I became really good at remembering because he was constantly contradicting himself. And I would notice, but most of the time it wasn't worth picking a fight over. And — But he would fight me on it sometimes 'cause I would po- I would point it out and, uh, he would insist that he had never said the thing that he said, he definitely did say. And then he would say something like, "How are you so sure you're remembering correctly? Why are you always right?" Um, and he definitely said the things that I heard him say and other people heard him say.

So, he had, now at this point, weaponized the safe word and was using it to ensure that I was hurt and on a constant basis. And he wasn't sorry anymore. Um, I couldn't even tell you the last time he had apologized for doing it anymore because now sometimes he would bite me and I would yell out the safe word because it hurts so bad and he'd clamp down even harder and, just for a second, just for good measure, before letting go and sometimes I'd say the safe word and he'd grind his teeth down on my skin and sometimes he'd smile after, um, like a gloating grin?

And during this time I was filled with so much anxiety all the time that I was constantly nauseous. Gagging daily, um, on occasion throwing up because of the pit that was in my stomach. I never told him about that though. I was going and running away quietly to throw up in the toilet and rejoin our group of friends.

Um, but I felt so unwanted and ignored. Um, and I would tell him that and then he would reassure me that he wanted to be together and he loved me. He loved me more than I loved him, even. He would always insist that that was true, like the, "I love you." "I love you more," but he was like, really serious about it.

Um, and looking back, I do believe that the way I was swept off my feet at the beginning of this relationship was 100 percent love bombing. Um, and we were friends for a time. Um, at least people would have thought that, actually, but I use the word friend very loosely because, um, we had actually never spoke to each other outside of group chats we were in together when, like a handful of times throughout the, the whole time that we knew each other, um, but did not talk to each other.

So I wouldn't have even called him my friend until he found out I was single, waited a few weeks to reach out, and then we started a friendship and then that friendship turned romantic and then he made these huge romantic gestures. He wrote me the most beautiful love letter that I had ever read. Um, he called me his soulmate. He talked about "forever" one month in. He told me he hadn't been in a relationship in five years. He thought he could never find love again before he met me. He said he wanted someone to grow with. He wanted to be a dad. He had all his names picked out and I didn't have a preference because I — My feeling of it is that the timing is right and with the right person, I could, um, but if that doesn't work out in time or the time, you know, I, I'm not super pressed about it. Um, but I started opening my mind up to the idea with him because it seemed so important to him. And I kept trying to talk to him to figure out where he was, later on, when I could tell things like, were declining.

And, um, now all of a sudden he's telling me he's not sure he wants kids at all. In fact, he has never been attached to the idea of kids. Um, and I told him that isn't what he said before, and he said he's allowed to change his mind. And I'm of the opinion that in a relationship, there are a few things that you are not actually allowed to change your mind without letting your partner know.

I think that kids is one of them. It wasn't even important to me. Um, and I think marriage is one of them, so I brought that up next. And I asked if he still wanted marriage. He said he wanted to marry me. And then he said, now, "I'm not the co-" quote, "I'm not the commitment guy. You know that."

I didn't know that.

Why are you dating me?

In fact, he was telling me the exact opposite every day. Uh, he would tell me he still wanted to be together. He wanted to work on all of the problems. He wanted to, like, he wanted me at the end of everything. He did not want to break up. He made that very clear. And uh, I have though, caught him in lies before, but usually it was small stuff and I, again, I didn't want to, it wasn't anything that ever seemed worth rocking the boat over, uh, which isn't normal for me.

I hate lies. Um, and yet I ended up lying for him. So, uh, but he had lied about big things and he had also been caught lying by his friends numerous times. So this is something that he feels is acceptable to do. And everything reached a breaking point when he was about to leave for an extended period of time.

We were not going to see each other very much, a few days out of every few months, um, and now suddenly he is dumping all of these problems that he has been having feelings about all of this time later. Um, at one point he said he's been feeling this way a couple of months. At another point, he says he's been feeling this way for six months, immediately contradicting him- contradicting himself in the same conversation.

And with no time to do anything about it. I arrived — the one of — Never mind. I'm gonna get to something later, but I literally arrived for three days for this conversation to happen and then leave. Um, my cat just woke up and she's not usually awake right now — Hi, my love. It's really close to her dinner time. I should have fed her early.

Um, so no time to fix any of the problems all the sudden because there are three days before he leaves and he insisted he did not want to break up. He, and so, he was expecting me to have a solution somehow, magically, and I gave a number of solutions that would have a way forward for us to be together, but he refused to make any compromise, um, whatsoever.

And he said that "the relationship was starting to feel like a responsibility," towards the end. Also his words. Um, so it wasn't a responsibility the whole rest of the time to him. And he was at this point, basically flaunting that he would never prioritize me over anything. Um — she's eating my laundry. Please don't cause problems. — Um, and I wasn't even asking for literally even the bare minimum. I was asking for so little and he — I was watching him give exactly what I was needing in the relationship all over the place to anybody else who, who just happened to ask and just wasn't me. So, um, and he also, he was never going to prioritize me over anything that would give him more fame or money.

In fact, he said that himself. He, uh, that was exactly why he was not going to compromise at all for a solution for us to be together. Because he said he wanted to see how much fame and money he could get. Um, and I just thought we wanted to be together. I thought that's what we both wanted, because that's what he was still saying he wanted to.

Um, but then he also admitted to me that he had grown resent- uh, he had grown to resent me. And I have to be thankful that he said that bit out loud. A lot of these bits he said out loud. Because that was the last push that I needed to get myself out.

He had grown resentful, which I also pointed out that there was no reason. Like, there was no reason to feel that way and he admitted that there was no reason for him to feel that way either. I think that it was because I'm someone who can communicate how I feel. Um, but, I don't know, I think, there, I have a lot of theories and reasons why I believe things happen the way that they did and why he was lying all of the time.

Um, but, he was "resentful" of me, was causing me physical harm every day, multiple times a day, despite me telling him over and over again to stop. He wasn't going to change, and he wasn't going to end the relationship. He was going to keep hurting me, and it was possibly going to escalate even further. So I broke up with him.

And I didn't even want to. Um, because I couldn't even see for such a long time after, um, what it really was that had happened. That he had abused me. And, in fact, we left things as, we want to be friends, and he can never imagine not speaking to me again. Um, and then he never spoke to me again. Uh, outside of like a couple of exchanges where I needed to ask for my clothes to be shipped, um, so at least I got my clothes back, uh, I had a whole closet full.

However, uh, he did throw away all of my other things, uh, without saying a word to me about it. Hundreds of dollars of things from my office were trashed without a word, and I didn't block him till ten months later because I wanted an open door still. I really thought I wanted to be his friend. Um, but, uh, I don't feel that way anymore.

I do believe he was bottling up so many emotions, uh, and he would never talk about how he felt. Um, I, I think he even, I mean, he did admit that he felt like he couldn't say it any sooner. Like, there was just no possible way to say how he was feeling sooner than the absolute last possible chance. Like, not even a chance, because three days before he left, that was actually a lie too, also.

He didn't leave for another week after I left. He, he brought me in, had this three day conversation, he was supposed to leave, and then he stayed for another week before he left, uh, with all of the friends that I was also meant to see, but he had lied to me about the dates too.

Um, but I do believe that there, uh, that he was bottling up so many emotions that he was taking it out on me physically. I believe there was a moment where he knew that he didn't want to be in the relationship anymore and instead of just ending it, he tried to push me away any way he knew would hurt me. And he knew all of the ways that would hurt me the most. And he knew he was hurting me. There was no way that he didn't know because of the safe word that he made.

Uh, and he just didn't care. He was hurting me and he didn't care. And even looked like he was enjoying it, sometimes. Um, and I can look back now and I can see all these instances that were really major red flags. Um, there was this one time that he pinned me down and asked me to try my absolute hardest to get him off of me.

And I couldn't do it, obviously. And he said something to make the point that he was so much stronger than me that I wouldn't be able to fight him back. Fight back against what? What do you mean? You don't say shit like that to people? That's insane. Um, and I was also sexually assaulted by my first boyfriend, and he knew that.

Um, he had stopped giving anything to the relationship, and he said that why was because he "was just waiting for things to change on their own." Um, he said he also "didn't have the time or energy anyway to do the things that I was asking for." Um, but then would constantly make any bit of time and energy for anybody and anything but me.

Uh, and he would say he wanted more quality time, so then I would try to arrange things for us to do online because we were, uh, long distance, but then he would complain that he doesn't want to spend all of his time on the computer anymore. Uh, and then we'd be there in person and all he wants to do is stay inside, play games on his computer, watch movies. He doesn't want to go out.

Um, and I'm not saying any of this next part to be mean, um, he lived in filth like I have never seen, and I've seen filth. This was the worst. Uh, he would spill things on the floor and never, literally never clean them up. Uh, he got an ant infestation once, um, and wasn't going to do anything about it because he said, he said "Bugs are normal in British houses," um, so I had to buy Antkiller. And he wouldn't clean his bathroom for months, and months, and months, but would constantly complain about how bad it smelled, and I would tell him, that's mould. It's mould. He complained about being tired all the time too, which I don't know if that was a lie or not, but mould will do that too.

But he would insist that it wasn't, somehow, without having cleaned in months. But it's not mould. Um, when I met him, he was washing his clothes without detergent. Um, just, he wasn't using that at all, and I don't know for how long before I met him. He was just running it with water and then hanging it on his filthy kitchen cabinets.

Um, and I felt bad. I felt bad because I felt like he needed someone to help him learn how to be cleaner. I thought he just didn't know how and I listened to all of the struggles of his upbringing and I was like, "He just doesn't know how. Someone just needs to show him." Um, and then I found out that he said he doesn't clean at all when I'm not there because he just waits for me to get there to do it.

Um, and I only found out about that after we broke up because he said it behind my back. Uh, I was doing all of the cleaning and laundry for him. Also, I had a separate bathroom. I want to make that clear. I wasn't using that bathroom. I had a separate bathroom that I cleaned for myself. I had cleaning supplies. I don't think he even actually knew I had cleaning supplies in there. Um, but I had my own bathroom.

Um, all the, all the cleaning, all the laundry. All of it. I was paying for. All of the, um, like paper towels, like soap, all of that only stayed in the house so long as I was buying it. Um, I would arrive and there would just not be toilet paper in the whole house. There were paper towels instead. And who knows for how long, too.

Um, I was paying for food more than half the time. Uh, because he would often push me into ordering food for us even if I had paid for the last meal, or the meal before that. Um, and I'm of the opinion now that I shouldn't have been paying for any food. Um, none at all, but I wanted to at least, I thought I was being equal by at least doing like a back and forth. Um, but, uh, I ended up paying for food more often than just going back and forth anyway. And he would do this to his friends all the time too. Um, but I was also paying for every plane ticket and the cat sitter, which cost roughly the amount of a plane ticket to England.

Um, and he never offered to help me pay after the couple of times he did come here to visit me because he paid for the flights that we would both take. Um, but that only happened twice at the very beginning. I have actually had a friend tell me that, that this is financial abuse, but I don't know enough about that to say for myself, but I was telling him that I couldn't afford it, uh, all by myself all the time because I was losing money. I was never able to work properly there and he wasn't traveling at all to see me anymore, even though he said he would. Uh, that was like the basis of our entire relationship starting off. Um, so then he agreed to pay for the cat sitter so that it would be basically paying half the cost of my travels. Um, and he did that once, and then never did it again, uh, despite many more months of dating.

Uh, and I was traveling often. Um, I had to. Because he was worried that we weren't spending enough quality time together. And then all of the time that he would have ever extra, he would choose, choose, to not spend it on me because there was an available choice and he chose not to spend it with me. Often.

Um, and I did everything short of just up and move there, which I was willing to do the whole time. And I told him that I was willing to do it and he knew, uh, but he insisted that I don't. He insisted not to. He was planning to move here. That was supposed to happen first.

Um, and then at the end of the relationship, he said, "Maybe things would have been different if I lived there." If I lived there. Uh, like I had said I would the whole time and he insisted I don't. Maybe that could have saved the relationship. Um, and I say all of this because I believe that people like this are genuinely dangerous. I believe he is dangerous.

Um, he was willing to lie. He was willing to do harm to someone he claimed to love more than anyone he has ever loved. Uh, his actions escalated, um, and I don't think that I'll be the last person that he hurts. Uh, and I felt like sharing my story was really important to warn people. Um, I want people to see the signs that I refused to.

I want you to listen to your body. Um, and get out as soon as possible. Tell your friends the truth and let them help you.

Um, I really thought I, I couldn't — Because I had been sexually assaulted in a previous relationship, I just thought I was so much smarter. To never — and I was like, "if someone ever laid their hands on me, I'd leave immediately. It would never happen a second time." But you, you just, it just kind of happened so slowly over time, and got worse, and worse, and worse, until the point where there's no way to deny the fact that he was hurting me and he knew, and, and didn't care.

That's just the kind of thing that I keep repeating to myself when I'm like, "But was it bad enough? What? It wasn't violent enough." Um, but I was being hurt multiple times every single day. Days, and days, and days, and days, for a month at a time in a row, uh, and I'm not even speaking on most, because I did touch on other things, but I am not even speaking on most of the other things that, in my opinion, I do think that there are some things that are across a line that make you a bad person.

I don't think that most people can be defined in a black and white, you're good or you're bad, but I do believe that there is a line that you can cross and only bad people will do the things on the other side of that line. You know what I mean? Um, and I watched a couple of things cross that line. And I just, I, I truly feel now that my soul is so healed.

Um, I am light years beyond him. Uh, this was the last thing that I felt like I needed to do — That's my cat. — Um, before I could move forward and hopefully never talk about him ever again. Outside of maybe my stories that I want to tell about other shitty things he did. Anonymously mixed in with the other stories I still have of shitty things that shitty exes did.

Because I think it's important for us to share our stories and our experiences. I think it's important for all of us to know that we deserve so much better than this. Um, and I think that if people don't want us to talk about the shitty things that they do, then they shouldn't do shitty things. Um, and this just felt so important to share.

I always wanted to share my experiences. I always will. Um, and that's kind of it. That's it. That's the end of everything I prepared. I reserve the right, uh, entirely to change my mind later and tell every story I want to, um, but for now that's all I really have, I feel like, from my soul, I want to speak on. Because I think that this can help other people.

I think that it can help other victims. Um, I have already talked to a number of — I only cry now when I'm talking about my friends! Who also dealt with such shitty things from shitty people. Um, but I'm also so, so grateful for all of my friends who were through, uh, with me through this whole thing. And my friends who also were experiencing similar, similar sorts of situations, um, at the same time, and we kind of went through it together. So, um, I think they are the strongest people in the whole world, and they made me feel like the strongest people in the whole world today. Did I call myself people? I meant person. I feel like the strongest people — I did it again. — I feel like the strongest person. They made me feel so brave. I felt impenetrable today. Um, but I am gonna go now because my friends are coming over and we're immediately gonna go become distracted by watching Love Is Blind. I already watched all of it already and I don't care.

So thank you, um, for listening. Thank you everyone who gifted subs. Um, um, I am going to be taking, uh, the rest of the week off from streaming. I have a video going out on Saturday and I'll be back next week and, uh, you won't hear about any of this again for a while, probably. But, uh, thank you all. I don't really even know what to do now. I think I'm just going to end. Um, go spread love all over the place on Twitch right now and I'll see you guys later. Bye.

Wilbur's response:

In the past week a series of allegations have been made over my conduct from an ex-girlfriend. I want to emphasise that, although I feel it fair to offer my perspective, this person's feelings are completely valid. I have taken my time sharing this statement as I wanted to process and respond respectfully and with the hope to gain a deeper understanding for the situation.

During our relationship's final months, I regrettably became slobbish, disrespectful, and selfish. These actions caused a lot of pain to my ex-girlfriend and I've since sought therapy to address these behaviours, making significant lifestyle changes to rectify my past actions. I have come to realise how much my past behaviour hurt this person, but I truly, compassionately believe I have made great strides from the person I once was and hope I can continue to grow and improve on this trajectory.

The allegation of abuse, particularly in the form of biting, deeply shocked me. Throughout our relationship, I understood from our numerous conversations and text message exchanges on the subject, that this behaviour was consensual, playful and reciprocally enjoyed. I truly believe those personal message exchanges reflect mutual affection and understanding. Out of respect for her, I choose not to publish them and I emphasise my perspective is not shared to diminish or invalidate anyone's feelings. Instead I share it in the hope that I can offer a genuine, fair and relevant insight into my understanding of the situation. While I may perceive our interactions differently, I recognise that this person has processed and expressed feelings of hurt. I want to extend my sincerest apologies for any pain that I caused.

I am fully committed to understanding and addressing her concerns going forward. I hope my perspective sheds light on this situation without detracting from its message. I am dedicated to earning and maintaining the trust of those around me and hope I continue to be held to these high standards I wish to attain and maintain.

- Will

Shubble's response:

i could not have imagined what i would wake up to today. my ex pretending he thought i enjoyed being hurt... and all of my friends immediately coming to my defense. The support has brought me to tears, i don't even know what to say. i'll be back, i'll just be taking a little time

and for the record, i don't accept the apology

#shelby #shelby shubble #wilbur situation #Youtube

338 notes · View notes

bonecoatvodtranscripts · 2 months

Text

Transcript: talking about something more serious (Shubble VOD 2/21/2024)

youtube

CWs: physical abuse, emotional abuse/gaslighting, financial abuse, mentions of sexual assault

Feel free to reupload this transcript anywhere, I really don't care about credit for this one

Hello!

I don't know if you can even hear it. I put on, like, light jazz in the background because it seemed awkward being quiet, but I don't think you can hear it, so I'm just going to turn it off. Hello.

Welcome. We are in emote-only cause I'm just going to be talking today and then I'm going to go. I'm going to go. Yeah, it was very very low. There's no need. I just - it felt weird leaving you in silence, but I'm here, so.

Hello. I want to talk about something today that... I'm very nervous. I feel sweaty. I had a sweater on. I had to take it off. I'm going to try and just - I wrote down pretty much everything I think that I want to say, to keep track of all the points that I want to make sure I don't forget anything, so I will be reading from something a good portion of the time, but not 100% of the time. And I just wanted to make sure I got all of my thoughts down in words ahead of time. I really like writing down my thoughts, so I did that.

Oh, hold on. Can I turn ads off? I think that maybe we turn ads off today. (laughs) How do I make that happen for just today? I should have had that already. I actually don't even know how to make that happen. You know what? That's just going to have to be that way. I'm so sorry, um... I'm all good.

Yeah, okay. Today's just going to be talking. I'm just going to start reading from what I wrote and go from there. I have a really big coffee. I'm going to take a swig. (drinks some coffee) And I have my water, and I'm going to take a swig of that. (drinks some water)

I have always liked telling my different experiences that I've had in dating, because it feels important to me to share what I've learned and maybe help other people to not make the same mistakes that I have before. I'm 30. I've dated a lot. I've gone on a lot of dates. I keep trying, and it's unfortunate that a lot of my dating history, there were a lot of bad people that tried to manipulate or control me. But that's not to say that every person that I've dated has treated me poorly. Some people just weren't the right people. And speaking out about my bad experiences has never felt as important as it does right now, because silence has always brought me peace, and this time it feels like my silence is not keeping my peace. It's only keeping somebody else's peace.

And I never thought that I could be the kind of person to end up in a situation like I did. I never thought that could happen to me. And so for me this is important, because it could help anybody else see the signs sooner than I did, or hopefully avoid a similar situation entirely, because... (deep breath) The truth is it was dangerous.

There were a lot of things wrong in this relationship that, um... I endured some pretty terrible treatment. And I might touch on some things here and there about that, if I feel like it's important to the overall context. But what I want to stay focused on is this specific issue, and the things that happened matter-of-factly and the things that people saw and witnessed in our circle.

It took me 10 months after to heal, and I spoke with multiple therapists and tried different forms of therapy. I tried somatic therapy. That one was actually really good for me, because that one actually helped me release a lot of built-up anger I was having over the last year. But the anger that I was feeling was for myself, because I felt like I should have known better. I felt so stupid at myself for staying through all of this. And I shared my story with a lot of friends after I started talking to therapists, and I was like, So this thing happened and I wasn't really sure. It just seems weird now to me, looking back. And all of them told me exactly what was happening in the words that I was too afraid to use. And I was being hurt in my last relationship, and it took me all of that time to see it through that lens. I even posted an anonymous story to Reddit that I have now deleted, with an anonymous account, but in posting that, I found a dozen other stories that were exactly like mine, exactly the same way. And all of the comments said exactly the same thing.

And I was so mad at myself because I was lying, too, at a certain point, to protect this person, because I knew that if I told my friends the truth, it would make him look really bad.

I didn't think that I would cry, and I practiced saying all of this and I didn't cry, but it's easier to practice it when no one is listening.

But he always cared more about how it looked, and that was really important. Not what was true. And it was really subtle. When I hear about... When I hear about physical abuse, I think of hitting. I think of hitting and punching. So I thought that this wasn't violent enough to be abuse. I thought that it was just, like, a constant accident that he kept hurting me. But he's not hitting me.

And it didn't start as something that he did to hurt me. He had this habit of biting, which is so weird to me now, but he said that he had this habit since he was a kid, and even his mom said that that was true, and he said it was just affectionate, and that might have been... I mean, I think that might have been true maybe at the start, but I also feel that I have good reason to believe that every part of it was a lie. But that's just my personal opinion.

And I had no problem with just biting. That isn't even the most uncommon thing. But he did mention something early that I should have taken as a red flag. And he want wanted to make sure that I was okay with him biting me, because he didn't want me to come back later and say that he abused me, which I thought was really weird considering he had never hurt me before, and so why would I call it abuse, and why was he thinking about that? And I thought he was being sweet, checking on me to make sure that I was still comfortable, but of course I was, because he hadn't hurt me. And why would I think he ever would?

And then he did for the first time, by accident. And I don't specifically remember the actual first time that he bit me too hard by accident, because I didn't think that it would be significant. I thought that it would only happen once. And he started biting me more and more over a period of time, sort of throughout the whole relationship, and accidents of him biting too hard and really hurting me happened more and more frequently. But he always seemed genuinely sorry, and he decided that he didn't want to keep accidentally hurting me. So we were going to use a safeword so he could learn where my limit was, where my pain tolerance ended. And saying that out loud now doesn't sound - like, that's not very sound logic. But at the time, I thought he cared about not hurting me, but in reality it's like, why are you biting so hard? And why do you have to bite so hard? And it shouldn't be that hard of a problem to stop. That shouldn't be that hard.

And he disguised it as this really quirky part of our relationship, and was so comfortable sharing it with his friends, to the point that he would do it in front of them. He thought it was this really funny story to tell, and a good bit to take my arm and bite me in front of everybody until I literally shout in pain. And then I have to laugh it off, because I'm so embarrassed and I don't want to cause a scene in front of our friends, and I'm sure everyone was a little bit uncomfortable, but as long as I was saying that it was fine, nobody really felt like they needed to be concerned, and that's not anybody's fault, because I was lying. I was lying, and it wasn't fine, because I would go home later and I'd tell him how uncomfortable I was, how much I didn't like being hurt all the time, and I needed him to really stop biting so hard. I didn't like it, and I tried telling him over and over again, because he-

[VOD cuts] - asked him to stop again. This time he said, This is who he is. He isn't going to change. Those were his words. And I remember a lot of specifically his words about certain things, especially at the end, because I'm good at remembering words. Especially his wording, I became really good at remembering, because he was constantly contradicting himself. And I would notice, but most of the time it wasn't worth picking a fight over. But he would fight me on it sometimes, cause I would point it out, and he would insist that he had never said the thing

that he said, he definitely did say. And then he would say something like, "How are you so sure you're remembering correctly? Why are you always right?" And he definitely said the things that I heard him say, and other people heard him say.

So he had, now, at this point, weaponized the safeword, and was using it to ensure that I was hurt and on a constant basis, and he wasn't sorry anymore. I couldn't even tell you the last time he had apologized for doing it anymore, because now sometimes he would bite me, and I would yell out the safeword because it hurt so bad, and he'd clamp down even harder. Just for a second, just for good measure, before letting go. And sometimes I'd say the safeword, and he'd grind his teeth down on my skin, and sometimes he'd smile after, like a gloating grin.

And during this time I was filled with so much anxiety all the time that I was constantly nauseous, gagging daily, on occasion throwing up because of the pit that was in my stomach. I never told him about that, though. I was going and running away quietly to throw up in the toilet and rejoin our group of friends. But I felt so unwanted and ignored. And I would tell him that, and then he would reassure me that he wanted to be together and he loved me. He loved me more than I loved him, even. He would always insist that that was true. Like that, "I love you." "I love you more." But he was, like, really serious about it.

And looking back, I do believe that the way I was swept off my feet at the beginning of this relationship was 100% love bombing. And we were friends for a time. At least, people would have thought that, actually, but I use the word "friend" very loosely, because we had actually never spoke to each other outside of group chats we were in together, like, a handful of times throughout the whole time that we knew each other, but did not talk to each other. so I wouldn't have even called him my friend. Until he found out I was single, waited a few weeks to reach out, and then we started a friendship. And then that friendship turned romantic, and then he made these huge romantic gestures. He wrote me the most beautiful love letter that I had ever read. He called me his soulmate. He talked about forever one month in. He told me he hadn't been in a relationship in 5 years. He thought he could never find love again before he met me. He said he wanted someone to grow with. He wanted to be a dad. He had all his names picked out. And I didn't have a preference, because my feeling of it is, if the timing is right, and with the right person I could. But if that doesn't work out in time, or the timing, you know, I'm not super pressed about it.

But I started opening my mind up to the idea with him, because it seemed so important to him. And I kept trying to talk to him to figure out where he was later on when I could tell things were declining, and now, all of a sudden he's telling me he's not sure he wants kids at all. In fact, he has never been attached to the idea of kids. And I told him that isn't what he said before, and he said he's allowed to change his mind. And I'm of the opinion that in a relationship, there are a few things that you are not actually allowed to change your mind without letting your partner know. I think that kids is one of them. It wasn't even important to me. And I think marriage is one of them, so I brought that up next. And I asked if he still wanted marriage. He said he wanted to marry me. And then he said now, "I'm not the-" this is a quote, "I'm not the commitment guy. You know that."

I didn't know that. Why are you dating me? In fact, he was telling me the exact opposite every day. He would tell me he still wanted to be together. He wanted to work on all of the problems. He wanted me at the end of everything. He did not want to break up. He made that very clear.

I have, though, caught him in lies before, but usually it was small stuff, and again, I didn't want to - It wasn't anything that ever seemed worth rocking the boat over. Which isn't normal for me. I hate lies. And yet I ended up lying for him. But he had lied about big things, and he had also been caught lying by his friends numerous times. So this is something that he feels is acceptable to do.

And everything reached a breaking point when he was about to leave for an extended period of time. We were not going to see each other very much- a few days out of every few months. And now suddenly he is dumping all of these problems that he has been having feelings about all of this time later. At one point he said he's been feeling this way a couple months. At another point he says he's been feeling this way for six months, immediately contradicting himself in the same conversation. And with no time to do anything about it. I arrive the one of- Never mind. I'm going to get to something later. But I literally arrived for 3 days for this conversation to happen and then leave.

(cat mews) My cat just woke up and she's not usually awake right now. (leans to cat, offscreen) Hi, my love. It's really close to her dinner time. I should have fed her early.

So, no time to fix any of the problems all of a sudden, because there are three days before he leaves. And he insisted he did not want to break up. And so he was expecting me to have a solution somehow magically, and I gave a number of solutions that would have a way forward for us to be together, but he refused to make any compromise whatsoever. And he said that the relationship was starting to feel like a responsibility towards the end. Also his words. So it wasn't a responsibility the whole rest of the time to him.

And he was at this point basically flaunting that he would never prioritize me over anything. (talking to cat, indistinct) And I wasn't even asking for literally even the bare minimum. I was asking for so little. And he - I was watching him give exactly what I was needing in the relationship all over the place to anybody else who just happened to ask and just wasn't me.

And also, he was never going to prioritize me over anything that would give him more fame or money. In fact, he said that himself. That was exactly why he was not going to compromise at all for a solution for us to be together, because he said he wanted to see how much fame and money he could get. And I just thought we wanted to be together. I thought that's what we both wanted, because that's what he was still saying he wanted, too.

But then he also admitted to me that he had grown to resent me. And I have to be thankful that he said that bit out loud - a lot of these bits, he said out loud - because that was the last push that I needed to get myself out. He had grown resentful, which I also pointed out that there was no reason to feel that way, and he admitted that there was no reason for him to feel that way either. I think that it was because I'm someone who can communicate how I feel.

But I don't know. I have a lot of theories and reasons why I believe things happened the way that they did, and why he was lying all of the time. But he was resentful of me, was causing me physical harm every day, multiple times a day, despite me telling him over and over again to stop. He wasn't going to change and he wasn't going to end the relationship. He was going to keep hurting me, and it was possibly going to escalate even further. So I broke up with him. And I didn't even want to, because I couldn't even see for such a long time after what it really was that had

happened, that he had abused me. And in fact we left things as, we want to be friends, and he can never imagine not speaking to me again. And then he never spoke to me again, outside of, like, a couple of exchanges where I needed to ask for my clothes to be shipped, so at least I got my clothes back. I had a whole closet full. However, he did throw away all of my other things without saying a word to me about it. Hundreds of dollars of things from my office were trashed without a word. And I didn't block him till 10 months later because I wanted an open door still. I really thought I wanted to be his friend. But, uh, I don't feel that way anymore.

I do believe he was bottling up so many emotions, and he would never talk about how he felt. I think he even - I mean, he did admit that he felt like he couldn't say it any sooner, like there was just no possible way to say how he was feeling sooner than the absolute last possible chance. Not even a chance, because 3 days before he left - that was actually a lie too, also. He didn't leave for another week after I left. He brought me in, had this three-day conversation. He was supposed to leave, and then he stayed for another week before he left with all of the friends that I was also meant to see, but he had lied to me about the dates, too.

But I do believe that he was bottling up so many emotions that he was taking it out on me physically. I believe there was a moment where he knew that he didn't want to be in the relationship anymore, and instead of just ending it, he tried to push me away any way he knew would hurt me. And he knew all of the ways that would hurt me the most. And he knew he was hurting me. There was no way that he didn't know, because of the safeword that he made, and he just didn't care. He was hurting me, and he didn't care, and even looked like he was enjoying it sometimes.

And I can look back now and I can see all these instances that were really major red flags. There was this one time that he pinned me down and asked me to try my absolute hardest to get him off of me. And I couldn't do it, obviously, and he said something to make the point that he was so much stronger than me that I wouldn't be able to fight him back. Fight back against what? What do you mean? You don't say shit like that to people. That's insane. And I was also sexually assaulted by my first boyfriend, and he knew that.

He had stopped giving anything to the relationship, and he said that why was because he was just waiting for things to change on their own. He said he also didn't have the time or energy anyway to do the things that I was asking for, but then would constantly make any bit of time and energy for anybody and anything but me. And he would say he wanted more quality time, so then I would try to arrange things for us to do online because we were long distance, but then he would complain that he doesn't want to spend all of his time on the computer anymore. And then we'd be there in person and all he wants to do is stay inside, play games on his computer, watch movies. He doesn't want to go out.

And I'm not saying any of this next part to be mean. He lived in filth like I have never seen. And I've seen filth. This was the worst. He would spill things on the floor and never, literally never clean them up. He got an ant infestation once, and wasn't going to do anything about it because he said he said "Bugs are normal in British houses," so I had to buy ant killer. And he wouldn't clean his bathroom for months and months and months, but would constantly complain about how bad it smelled, and I would tell him, "That's mold. It's mold." He complained about being tired all the time, too, which I don't know if that was a lie or not, but mold will do that too. But he would insist that it wasn't, somehow, without having cleaned in months, but it's not mold.

When I met him, he was washing his clothes without detergent. Just he wasn't using that at all, and I don't know for how long before I met him. He was just running it with water and then hanging it on his filthy kitchen cabinets. And I felt bad. I felt bad because I felt like he needed someone to help him learn how to be cleaner. I thought he just didn't know how. And I listened to all of the struggles of his upbringing, and I was like, he just doesn't know how. Someone just needs to show him. And then I found out that he said he doesn't clean at all when I'm not there, because he just waits for me to get there to do it. And I only found out about that after we broke up, because he said it behind my back.

I was doing all of the cleaning and laundry for him. Also, I had a separate bathroom. I want to make that clear I wasn't using that bathroom. I had a separate bathroom that I cleaned for myself. I had cleaning supplies. I don't think he even actually knew I had cleaning supplies in there. But I had my own bathroom.

All the cleaning, all the laundry, all of it. I was paying for all of the, like, paper towels, soap. All of that only stayed in the house so long as I was buying it. I would arrive and there would just not be toilet paper in the whole house. There were paper towels instead. And who knows for how long, too. I was paying for food more than half the time, because he would often push me into ordering food for us, even if I had paid for the last meal or the meal before that. And I'm of the opinion now that I shouldn't have been paying for any food. None at all, But I wanted to, at least, I thought I was being equal by at least doing, like, a back and forth. But I ended up paying for food more often than just going back and forth anyway. And he would do this to his friends all the time, too.

But I was also paying for every plane ticket and the catsitter, which cost roughly the amount of a plane ticket to England. And he never offered to help me pay after the couple of times he did come here to visit me, because he paid for the flights that we would both take. But that only happened twice at the very beginning. I have actually had a friend tell me that this is financial abuse, but I don't know enough about that to say for myself. But I was telling him that I couldn't afford it all by myself all the time, because I was losing money. I was never able to work properly there, and he wasn't traveling at all to see me anymore, even though he said he would. That was, like, the basis of our entire relationship starting off. So then he agreed to pay for the catsitter so that it would be basically paying half the cost of my travels. And he did that once. (pause) And then never did it again despite many more months of dating. And I was traveling often. I had to, because he was worried that we weren't spending enough quality time together. And then all of the time that he would have ever extra, he would choose - choose - to not spend it on me, because there was an available choice and he chose not to spend it with me often.

And I did everything short of just up and move there, which I was willing to do the whole time, and I told him that I was willing to do it and he knew, but he insisted that I don't. He insisted not to. He was planning to move here. That was supposed to happen first. And then at the end of the relationship, he said maybe things would have been different if I lived there. If I lived there, like I had said I would the whole time, and he insisted I don't. Maybe that could have saved the relationship.

And I say all of this because I believe that people like this are genuinely dangerous. I believe he is dangerous. He was willing to lie. He was willing to do harm to someone he claimed to love more than anyone he has ever loved. His actions escalated, and I don't think that I'll be the last person that he hurts. And I felt like sharing my story was really important to warn people. I want people to see the signs that I refused to. I want you to listen to your body and get out as soon as possible. Tell your friends the truth and let them help you.

I really thought I couldn't - because I had been sexually assaulted in a previous relationship. I just thought I was so much smarter. And I was like, if someone ever laid their hands on me, I'd leave immediately. It would never happen a second time. But you just, it just kind of happened so slowly over time, and got worse and worse and worse until the point where there's no way to deny the fact that he was hurting me and he knew and didn't care. That's just the kind of thing that I keep repeating to myself when I'm like, "But was it bad enough? It wasn't violent enough." But I was being hurt multiple times every single day, days and days and days and days for a month at a time in a row.

And I'm not even speaking on most - because I did touch on other things, but I am not even speaking on most of the other things that, in my opinion, I do think that there are some things that are across a line that make you a bad person. I don't think that most people can be defined in a black-and-white "you're good or you're bad," but I do believe that there's a line that you can cross, and only bad people will do the things on the other side of that line, you know what I mean?

And the number of - (voice breaks, covers her mouth) I only cry now when I'm talking about my friends! Who also dealt with such shitty things from shitty people! But I'm also so, so grateful for all of my friends who were with me through this whole thing, and my friends who also were experiencing similar sorts of situations, at the same time, and we kind of went through it together. So I think they are the strongest people in the whole world, and they made me feel like the strongest people in the whole world today. Did I call myself people? I meant person. I feel like the strongest people - (laughs) I did it again. I feel like the strongest person. They made me feel so brave. I felt impenetrable today.

But I am going to go now because my friends are coming over and we're immediately going to go become distracted by watching Love is Blind. I already watched all of it already, and I don't care. So thank you for listening. Thank you everyone who gifted subs. I am going to be taking the rest of the week off from streaming. I have a video going out on Saturday, and I'll be back next week, and you won't hear about any of this again for a while, probably, but thank you all.

I don't really even know what to do now. I think I'm just going to end. Go spread love all over the place on Twitch right now, and I'll see you.

#shubble #shubble vods #wilbur situation #abuse tw #abuse cw #Youtube

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a-sleepy-raven · 7 months

Note

💙 coworkers to lovers with leon??? ☺️

Thank you for your request, dear anon, and my apologies for the long wait. I hope you enjoy it nevertheless. :)

prompt: 💙 coworkers to lovers

Leon Kennedy x gn!reader – coworkers to lovers (HCs)

Given the line of work Leon is in, he spends a lot of time with his coworkers. He might not be the most social person after everything that’s happened to him but he still makes an effort to actually remember their faces and names because he just spends so much time around them. That being said, he wouldn’t exactly consider them his friends – and he definitely can’t see himself getting closer to any of them.

However, his whole attitude about this changes the moment you join the team. There’s just something about you that draws Leon in, no matter how much he tries to fight it. And he really tries to fight it because you’re in the same team and it’s heavily frowned upon to get involved with each other under these circumstances. So, no matter how much he likes you or how interesting you are, Leon will most likely push you away at first.

He also tries to convince himself that working together with you is more than enough for him because, at least, that means you can spend some time with each other. However, it doesn’t really help with the growing attraction between the two of you, and he considers asking the higher ups to transfer you to a different team, just to get some peace of mind, but then he’d have to explain why he’s asking for the transfer and that would make things even more complicated. So, he just sucks it up and hopes that what he’s feelings for you is just a stupid crush that will go away soon.

It doesn’t go away, though, and Leon finds himself more and more drawn to you as the time goes by. He also starts to be less reserved around you and actually strikes up conversations with you and laughs at your jokes and teasing remarks. He feels oddly at peace around you, like nothing else matters when you’re there – a feeling he’s been craving for quite a while now if he’s being honest with himself.

The more you grow on him, the more Leon wants to be around you. He finds excuses to stay at the office longer, like a report he needs to finish (though it’s already been handed in), just to spend more time with you. Sometimes, when he notices that you’re once again working without taking a proper break, he brings you tea or coffee to cheer you up a little. It’s also quite obvious to your other coworkers that Leon likes you, based on the little things he does for you and the way his gaze lingers on you when you pass him by.

Better be prepared for the infamous invitation to dinner sooner or later. As much as Leon is self-confident and stern during missions, he’s an awkward mess when it comes to casual interactions, even more so when it comes to you. Of course, he tries to play it cool but it’s quite obvious how nervous he is about asking you out. (Every time he thinks back to this moment he can’t help but wonder how he got you to say Yes. It’s beyond him why you agreed to go out with him.)

Thank you so much for reading! If you enjoyed it, please consider reblogging, liking and/or leaving feedback. I'd really appreciate the support! <3

#leon kennedy x reader #leon s kennedy x reader #Leon Kennedy x you #Leon Kennedy headcanons #resident evil x reader #Leon Kennedy fluff #resident evil fluff #reader insert #gn!reader #gender neutral reader

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ilovetulips · 1 year

Text

fem!reader x older!tattooartist!eddiemunson

part 1 here !

WARNINGS : smut mdni. phone sex :)). age gap mentioned !! if u dont like dont read. basically the same as pt. 1 but shorter.

hope u all enjoy !! ♡ ♡ ♡ (p.s my reqs are open)

———

eddie hasn’t been able to get you off his mind. ever since you walked in and seduced him like a little minx. he knew it was ‘unprofessional’, yet if anyone else were out into that position, he’s certain they would’ve done the same.

such a sweet thing like you, and such an opposite man like him. you were younger, sure, but you were oh so sweet and fully aware of what you were doing when you first met.

you, similarly, can’t get the picture of that mess of curls out of your head. his lips, his hands trailing up your skirt, the small crows feet either side of his eyes. even his dick for gods sake. something about him was so enduring… so enchanting. you couldn’t help yourself.

it had been 5 days since your last and first interaction with eddie munson, and it has been replaying in your head nonstop. but there hasn’t been a call yet, and now you’re starting to regret your sudden outburst of confidence.

i mean, you had ended on a really good note - he finished your tattoo, you payed at a discounted price because he said you’d already gave him enough ‘payment’. but why hadn’t he called you back…?

had you come off too strong? maybe he did that with all of his clients… could you just be another one of them? what if he just didn’t care about you? you were obsessed with him but did he even think about you and—

ring ring.

no, it can’t be him. that’ll be too convenient of a time right? it’s probably work.

you trail over to the phone on the wall, lazily dragging your legs after laying in bed all day. it was about 10pm, your day being well spent in the comfort of your room. you were expecting a call from work too, so you had already lost hope for eddie and assumed it was your boss calling you.

“hello?” you say sweetly down the phone, spinning the lean your back against the wall.

“missed that voice, hi sweetheart.” your heart stopped. the world stopped. it was actually him - you’d been dreaming about hearing that voice again and it was finally happening right now.

“y’there y/n?” you twirl the cord around your finger.

“hi, eddie.” a high pitched voice sounds down the microphone, not registering in your mind that it’s yours. your heart is quite literally pounding in your chest now.

“sorry about not calling you sooner sweetness, been busy. i’ve missed you.” the heat rises to your cheeks faster than it ever has. you feel like a girl in high-school with a stupid crush.

“s’okay, i’ve been busy too. m’glad you finally called me though.”

“oh yeah? you missed me sweet thing?” now he just sounds cocky.

“mmm, i wouldn’t go that far.” you smirk.

“i see how it is…”

silence. it consumes the both of you. it’s not the awkward type, you feel as if you are just flourishing in his company through the phone.

“m’being serious when i say i missed you. couldn’t stop thinking about you, y’little minx.” he lets out a breathy laugh at the nickname, and it could quite possibly be the sexiest thing you’ve ever heard. you become aware of your clothes feeling too hot, and your thighs clenching tightly.

“i missed you too. nearly came to your work to book another tattoo just to see you.” you giggle slightly and bite your lip, sounding ridiculous and wanting to stop yourself.

“that obsessed already baby? gotcha hooked. should’ve came down, last time was definitely something.” as if your face couldn’t get anymore red.

you laugh down the phone, not knowing how to respond to that unforgettable day. heat pools underneath your small bedtime shorts.

“maybe you should’ve called me earlier, we could’ve done something… i’ve missed you.” your eyelids clamp shut, afraid you’re starting something you won’t be able to finish.

eddie was sat there, stunned and shirtless in his bedroom of his apartment. and let’s be honest, the plaid pants he was wearing as pyjamas weren’t leaving much to the imagination as his boner presses against the stitching. as soon as he heard your voice, he couldn’t help himself.

“fuck- you can’t say stuff like that t’me sweetheart. m’going crazy over here.” your statement didn’t leave much to the imagination, and ended with him rutting his hips into the air to get some sort of release. he lets out a small moan at the feel of his leaky tip touching the thin material of his pants.

the growing tension was absolutely suffocating, yet neither of you wanted to make the first move and wanted to relish in it until it snapped.

now you aren’t going to pretend like you didn’t hear him moan, because you most definitely did. before you even knew it, your nipples had pebbled against your small shirt, and slick was coating your thighs.

“watcha doin’ right now, eds?” the innocent act only made him worse.

he was still circling his hips, the waistband of his pants falling lower and leaving his happy trail becoming more and more exposed. you were circling your finger around the harsh indent of your nipple over your shirt, biting back a moan - both pleasuring yourself slightly but not fully committing yet.

“d’ya really want me to answer that, angel? cause i think you can hear what m’ doing.” he finally caves and pulls his hardened length of out his pants, precum dribbling down the tip in beads. just like the sick fuck he is, he moves the phone down to his hip level and starts rubbing his cock. “f-fuck, wish you were here touchin’ me right now.”

your receiver fills with sounds of eddie’s slick cock being rubbed, the sound of his spit and precum mixing to soak his dick perfectly. the sounds leave little to the imagination, as you trail your fingers down to your waistband to your dripping cunt. the jolt of pain that rushes through you when you brush over your throbbing cunt forces a moan to escape your lips.

“not so much of an angel are ya sweetheart- shit.” he bucks his hips into his fist, fucking his hand to the sound of your little pants. “touchin’ yourself to the sound of me. dirty girl.” the smirk in his voice evident.

“n-never said i was an angel—“ you slip your finger into your tight hole, plunging it all the way until you feel that spongey spot on your walls. it elicits such a sweet moan that eddie thinks he’s gonna cream himself right then and there. “n’ you started touchin’ yourself to the sound of my voice you perv.”

his hand speeds up, the moans spurring him on even further as he whines into the microphone of the phone. “fuck- missed your pretty noises so much. so so so much.” he hisses. “you gonna slip another finger in, baby? fill yourself up so it feels like me.” he wouldn’t admit that the nickname ‘perv’ was really making it difficult for him right now.

you nod despite him not being able to see you, and do what he says. “miss you touchin’ me. haven’t stopped thinking about you eddie.” your brain was starting to fuzz over, any words that could leave your mouth doing so.

he bites down on his lip, hard enough to draw blood as he holds back from blowing his load. edging himself so you could finish at the same time. judging my your moans and your fucked out voice, you weren’t far off.

you pump 3 fingers in and out of you, massaging that spot inside of you while your thumb works on your clit occasionally. the pressure was building in your tummy to quick you didn’t even have the chance to tell the boy.

“shh shh sweets, don’t worry. m’ gonna see you this week n’ make you feel so- fuck- so fuckin’ good. you want that?” at this point, you could only reply with chants of ‘yesyesyespleasefuck’ and high pitched moans that made eddie’s hand flood with the familiar hot liquid while yours drips out of you.

your back arches off the bed as you drop the phone onto the bed next to you, your pants and moans filling your room as you come down from your high. listening to it almost made the curly haired boy hard again as he imagined how you looked right now - fucked out eyes falling asleep and glossy red lips from biting down on them.

“lick ‘em clean, princes. wanna hear you suckin’ on them fingers nice n’ good.” so you did, making it a point to pop off your fingers obnoxiously loud with a ‘mmmm’.

“you promise to see me this week?” you practically whisper down the phone, not wanted to sound pathetic despite the fact you literally finger fucked yourself to the sound of him.

“i promise, my sweet sweet girl. i’ll take you out somewhere real fancy and—“ you cut him off.

“no. i don’t want fancy… i just wanna do something with just us two. maybe watch a movie or somethin’.”

it sounded like absolute heaven to him. “of course, baby. i’ll call you tomorrow. thanks for helpin’ me get off.”

and with that he hangs up, leaving you red faced and slightly horny again at the thought of what you just did.

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milkywaydrabbles · 7 months

Note

number one with alucard 👀 he got and interest on it but is kinda embarrassed to tell his dear wife but them she's SO into it, she wants nothing more than bend him over and pegg him 🥵

A/N: If I had a nickel for every time someone asked for Alucard to be pegged, I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but weird that it happened twice.

AAHH, ty both for asking for this baby boy was so close to being fucked in S3 (fuck the twins tho) crying and leg lifted and EVERYTHING. Let's give him what he wanted! I hope you enjoy reading this MWUAH

Pegging x Alucard

Alucard had been pacing around the castle, waiting for you to get back from your shopping. He decided today was the day he’d bring it up--even though he was absolutely scared shitless. He didn’t think you’d judge him for it...well, kind of. But it was a terrifying thing to ask, the darker parts of his brain telling him that you’d think him less of a man, that you should leave him, that you couldn’t look at him the same way again. It was all stupid, and empty fears, he knew that. But he couldn’t help but fear it all the same. When he heard the door creak open steeled himself and just went for it (after he helped with the groceries!)

“Hello, my love, how was your trip?” He placed a chaste kiss on your lips, grabbing the baskets you’ve brought along with you for the various meats and vegetables. “ Hmm, good. Happy to be back home.” Your soft voice and bright smile always made his heart nearly stop in his chest. God, how would he bring it up? He stayed quiet until everything was put away, a little too quiet really. “Honey, are you okay?” He flinched at the question, internally cursing himself for being so jumpy. “Ah, yes, well ah--” Deep breath, big boy. “I have a...request. I just...it’s a little embarrassing.” You gave him a moment, taking his hand in yours with a small smile. “Whatever it is, you can say it Adrian. You know I won’t judge you.” Here goes nothing.

“I want you to peg me.”

....did you hear that right?

You blinked at him for a moment, trying to process what he said. “You want me to...”

“Yes, well, I’ve been thinking about this for the last few weeks and--”

“Weeks?”

“--and I think I’m ready to ask you, of course you can say no it’s not that big of a deal--”

“Adrian.”

“But I think I’d like to try--”

“Adrian”

“--Actually never mind we can forget this conversation happened--”

“Adrian!”

He stopped his nonsense just for a moment to look at you, your smile turning into a less than innocent smirk on your face, and he swore you had horns growing from your head.

“Whatever my baby boy wants, he gets.” Ah, fuck

“B-baby please, a-ah fuck! Feels go-od” Alucard had been babbling on about how good you were making him feel from the moment he felt your lubed up fingers poking and prodding at his hole. It was a work in progress, going slow each second to make sure you both were still comfortable with what was happening. But any awkward tension quickly flew out the window when the dhampir started whimpering from your ministrations of the first finger. You couldn’t help but get wet, seeing him so pliable already and you’ve barely begun. “Adrian, you should have told me sooner you wanted this~” You cooed, adding a second finger into his ass, waiting for him to get accustomed before fucking them deeper into his hole. “Look at you, so desperate already.” Alucard grabbed at you, embarrassed at how whiney he was, shutting himself up by kissing you and hoping he could catch his bearings. You nipped at his lower lip, slipping your tongue into his mouth as you fingered him, finally adding a third finger and hearing his wanton moans like a bitch in heat. “You sound so slutty, pretty boy. You want me to fuck you?” You peppered kisses across his face, trailing down his neck and chest until finding purchase on a cute pink nipple. He nodded, arching himself closer to you. He nearly cried when you stopped your movements to look at him expectantly. “I need to hear you Adrian. Do you still want this?”

Ah, a moment of doubt creeping into your face. You needed the reassurance. “Yes, yes, please don’t stop. I need you to fuck me.” His face flush with need, wiggling his hips to urge you to continue. That was all you needed to hear. You smiled at him, like you always do, and laved a wet stripe over his nipple once more, curling and scissoring your fingers to make sure he was properly prepped for the strap you currently had on. “Doing so well, taking my fingers sweet boy. Gonna take good care of you, I promise.” Your sweet words had him in a daze, panting underneath you and legs nearly trembling with anticipation. You leaned back onto your knees, taking the bottle of lube and lathering up, and Alucard couldn’t take his eyes off you. Seeing your body already made him hot, he loved looking at your naked. You were absolutely perfect. But seeing you like this--domineering, hovering above him with what he deemed your cock in your hands, slowly stroking it to make sure it was covered in lube for his comfort, made his head spin. He whimpered, opening his legs more ready to take you. “Aw,” you cooed “such a good boy for me” You lined yourself up with his entrance, teasing at his hole. “You want my cock?” This time you were simply teasing him, smirking. “Please, angel I need it”

You pushed him, stretching his ass so deliciously with the cock strapped he couldn’t help but cry out. “Fuck, Adrian, I can have you like this for hours baby. You look so good, so fucking good.” You praised, goosebumps raising on his skin with every sweet word. “A-Angel, keep going please” He whined, bucking his hips in hopes for more friction. You complied, pulling out to the tip only to slam back in, biting your lower lip when you heard how whorish he sounded. You thought you could cum just from the view and sounds alone. You pushed down until your hips were flush with his, hands grabbing at his hips and angling yourself until you saw the tears streaming down his face and eyes rolling to the back of his head.

“Feels so good, feels so so good, fu-uck darling I can’t, please please please don’t stop.” Adrian let go all inhibitions, just focusing on the pleasure as you fucked deep into his hole, bumping your cock onto his prostate so nicely it made him see stars. He felt a hand caress at his face, wiping away the tears. He could make out some of the words you were saying, but his ears were ringing and he kept moaning and whimpering as you fucked him. Words like ‘good boy’, ‘so pretty’ , ‘slutty baby’. He couldn’t take it, the feeling so fucking good he begged to let him touch himself (you never told him no to begin with).

“Go ahead, sweet boy, touch yourself while I fuck you.”

A hand immediately wrapped around his painfully hard cock, pre-cum globs dribbling down his shaft. His movements were jerky, but he didn’t care. The pleasure of you fucking him deep and hard with his hand fisting at his cock, Alucard wasn’t going to last very long now. His words all jumbled together, simply nonsense babbling away as the knot tightened in his stomach. “Go ahead and cum for me, darling boy.” You whispered, unsure if he could even hear with how noisy he was. You burned the image into your mind, hoping he’d let you do this again if you asked nicely. You fucked into him as quickly as you could, movement so unnatural for you but you couldn’t help but want to do better for your sweet boy. He breath hitched as ropes of cum decorated his stomach and chest, cock twitching in his hand as he stuttered out how good he felt.

Sweat dripped from his brow, smile plastered on his face with a dazed, fucked out look in his eyes. He looked at you adoringly, reaching up at you to bring you down for a kiss which you happily complied. Slowly you slipped out, not wanting to hurt him in any way, not breaking the kiss. “Thank you, thank you...” he murmured with each kiss, nuzzling at your nose. “Let’s get you cleaned up, sweet boy, then rest.” You parted to take off the strap, barely having time to remove it from your hips before he stopped you from moving any further from him. You cocked a brow, unsure of what he wanted next.

“You didn’t think I wasn’t going to return the favor, did you?”

#milk writes #adrian tepes #alucard #alucard x reader #castlevania #adrian tepes x reader #alucard tepes x reader #castlevania (2017)#milk kinktober

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zoros-fourth-sword · 3 months

Text

LAW x FEM READER

Request post:

@makemake22 - Heyy, (srsly, i don't know what's your name so i can't call you, haha.) I just stumble along your fanfic, and i was wondering if i can request Law with yn that brat taming him. You can use your wild imagination, no problem.

Sorry if it took long but I am absolutely obsessed with this man so ofc I was going to write this so I hope you enjoy ❤️🥰

{MDNI 18+ only}

This oneshot is a 18+ onshot only so read at your own risk

This oneshot contains the following: brat taming, spanking, name calling, dom energy, fingering, smut, and more

BRATY FEM READER x DOM LAW

BEWARE MY WRITING SUCKS

“LIKE YOU FUCKING CARE LAW” I yell towards the man that was standing in front of me my face slightly red from my anger

“OF COURSE I CARE Y/N YOUR MY FUCKING GIRLFRIEND” Law yelled back at me not really wanting to deal with my shit at the moment he would rather go back to his study buddy than spend time 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 his 𝐆𝐈𝐑𝐋𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐃

“IF YOU DID YOU WOULD SPEND MORE TIME WITH ME THEN YOUR FUCKING STUDY BUDDY” I yell as I step closer to Law slightly having to look up at him due to his height

“Why is it such a fucking problem to study with my coworker Y/N you act like we’re fucking each other on the side” Law snapped out instead of yelling I guess the stupid fuck got tired

“That might not be your intention but that doesn’t mean that isn’t hers I don’t feel comfortable with you in the same room as her why can’t you understand that” I snap turning my head to the side so I didn’t have to look at him any longer because if I do I might punch him in the face

“Look Y/N I understand your feelings but this is my job we are talking about I’m not worried about a stupid girl that fantasizes about fucking me” Law huffed out while pinching the bridge of his nose

“Yea whatever all I’m saying is if she tries anything funny I’m fucking punching her teeth down her throat,” I say before turning my head back around to look at 𝐌𝐘 𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐒 face

“Y/N baby I wouldn’t dream of letting some low-life girl touch me and besides the only woman’s hands I want on me are yours” Law chucked out as he grabbed my hips to pull me into a hug

“You fucking better or I’ll chop your balls off” I mumble into his chest

“I know you will” Law chuckled nervously

“Baby I got to go now but I’ll be back around 9:00 pm,” Law said as he kissed the top of my head

“Okay baby I love you,” I say as I lift my head resting the bottom of my chin against his chest

“I love you too I got to go,” Law said before leaning down to place a kiss against my lips

“Okay” I huff out slightly dreading that I’m going to be alone for the rest of the day

“I promise to make it up to you later,” Law said as he let me go to grab his stuff to leave

“You better,” I say crossing my arms over my chest

“I will” Law chucked out before giving me one last kiss

“Mhm” I hum as he begins walking out the door

I’m currently sitting in front of my long mirror that sits in mine and Law's bedroom in blue lacy lingerie, that I bought a while back with Nami

If Law wants to be a little stubborn shit I’m going to give him a reason to come home the man said he was going to be home around 9:00 pm but it’s currently 11:30 he said they had to catch up on some more papers yea paperwork my ass I’m sure she’s trying to get him to stay longer with her sluty ass self I swear if I could kill a bitch It would be her

I decided that I would tease Law by sending him some spicy pics hoping it would make him come home sooner

I began positioning myself so my ass was sitting on the heels of my feet causing my back to arch giving the illusion that my ass was bigger than it was I quickly snap I few pictures before switching to my next position

I sit ass on the floor with my legs slightly parted giving Law the perfect view of my wet core

Once I was satisfied with how the pictures came out I quickly sent them to law with a little message along with them

“𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲 𝐢𝐦 𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐧𝐲 😒😘”

All I’m saying is if this doesn’t get his attention then I don’t know what will

“𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐭 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲 𝐢𝐦 𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐰𝐡𝐲 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝𝐧'𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐮𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐥 𝐢 𝐠𝐨𝐭 𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐞 <𝟑𝟑𝟑“

I don’t know maybe because you said you were going to be home a long time ago I mumble under my breath

“𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐛𝐞 𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 𝟗:𝟎𝟎 🥺💔”

“𝐢𝐦 𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐦𝐲 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐢𝐭𝐬 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐞 𝐩𝐚𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬☹️”

“𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐩𝐚𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐦𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐦𝐞 🥺💔”

“𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐭 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲 𝐝𝐨𝐧𝐭 𝐬𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐝𝐢𝐜𝐤 𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐨 𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐝 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐰”

“𝐦𝐚𝐲𝐛𝐞 𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐦𝐲𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐨𝐟𝐟 𝐬𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐝𝐨𝐧𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐞🙄😒”

“𝐝𝐨𝐧𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐰𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐥𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐭 𝐢𝐭𝐬 𝐦𝐲 𝐣𝐨𝐛 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐮𝐦“

“𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐝𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐩 𝐦𝐞 😒”

“𝐢𝐦 𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐚𝐲“

“Wow well I guess my plan kinda worked” I chuckle out to myself

I’m currently laying on mine and Law's bed with my legs spread while pleasing myself slightly hitting the squishy part of nerves that makes my legs go crazy

“Fuck” I wine out not being able to be quite

I began speeding up my pace once I felt my lower stomach start to heat up signaling that I was close to my release

“Fuck” I moan out slightly squeezing my legs around my wrist not being able to handle the pleasure

“𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐦𝐛𝐥𝐞𝐬“

Just as I was about to cum Law spawned right in front of me with the most pissed-off expression I have ever seen on his face

“Why you little brat” Law hissed out of his teeth throwing his sword aside

“Wait Law I’m s-“ I struggle to say still breathing hard from earlier events

“No princess I don’t wanna hear your excuses” Law growled out before making his way towards me

“But,” I say with wide eyes while scooting all the way back against the headboard

“This is what you wanted baby I came home so you don’t get to bitch” Law said as he began crawling up the bed to get to me

“You have been a fucking brat today,” Law said as he grabbed my ankles before pulling me down toward him

“Law” I squeal out surprised by his actions

“Don't be surprised Y/N you brought this on yourself and I’m going to make sure you get your fucking punishment” Law growled down towards me as he rest between my thighs on his knees

“Fuck you Law you left me alone what did you expect I was horny for fucks sake and we haven’t had sex in like two weeks because you’ve been so busy with work” I mumble out turning my head to the side with my arms crossed over my chest

“Don’t try to guilt trip me princess” Law said as he jerked my head back towards him by my chin

“You get to shut your mouth and be a good obedient girl for me ya” Law said his deep voice causing heat to run up my core

“Brats don’t get rewards,” Law said as he traced my bottom lip with his tattooed thumb

“They get punishments and I think it’s about time for yours,” Law said as he traced his hand down my chin and to my neck before warping his fingers around it slightly squeezing

“Fuck Law” I whine out shutting my eyes due to the pleasure

“Mhm princess that’s right I want this to be torture for you I want you begging” Law chuckled as he pressed his knee against my clothed core

“I will admit baby you did an amazing job at making yourself look all pretty for me,” Law said as he began circling my core with his knee causing me to fling my head back before letting out a broken moan

“Fuck baby your so hot” Law hissed out as he began tracing his hand that was around my neck down my body and towards my breast

“Blue looks so good on you baby but unfortunately I’m going to have to remove this” Law said as he grabbed the bottom of my bra before bringing it back and letting it go causing it to snap against my skin

“Fuck Law I can’t handle it” I sigh as droll began to run out of the corners of my mouth due to Law's constant abuse on my pussy

“Yes you can baby and you will you did this to yourself remember,” Law said as he sped up his pace with his knee

“Please I can’t” I sob as my legs begin to shake

“How sad princess I haven’t even started,” Law said as he stopped

“Fuck” I whine out in relief

“Don’t get too comfortable” Law said as he turned me around so I was lying on my stomach with my ass up in the air against his hard cock

“Fuck Law” I moan letting my head hang between my arms

“Fuck princess I can’t wait to fuck you my cock has missed you so much,” Law said as he began grinding against my ass causing my pussy to clench around the air

“Shit Law” I pant out with my head still hanging between my arms

“Oh you poor girl let Doctor Traffy make you feel good” Law chuckled as he pulled my head back up by my hair

“Fuck Law I can’t” I sob as tears formed in my eyes

“That’s too bad Princess,” Law said as he landed a harsh slap against my ass cheek with his free hand

“Fuck Law” I squeal out in surprise my body slightly jerking forward causing laws to grip on my hair to tighten

“Mhm baby just nine more of those and you good ya” Law hummed out as he rubbed the red mark on my ass slightly soothing the pain

“Mhm” I hum as I begin nodding my head

“Good girl,” Law said as he jerked his hand back to slap my ass again

“Count with me okay,” Law said as he landed a slap against my cheek

“Okay” I broke out slight tears running down my face

“One” Law said as he raised his hand again

“One” I breathe out

“Two” *smack*

“Two” I whine out

“You're doing such a good job princess,” Law said as he rubbed the handprint

“Three” *smack*

“Three” I sob as I grip the sheets

“Four” *smack*

“fuck four” I broke out as I began breathing hard slightly becoming lightheaded due to so many emotions fogging my brain

“Almost Princess” Law said

“Five” *smack*

“Five” I weakly say

“Six” *smack*

“Six” I pant

“Four more baby” Law said

“Seven” *smack*

“Ten” I cry out once Law finished giving me my punishment

“You did such a good job baby I’m proud of you” Law praised me as he began rubbing my throbbing ass cheek

“Thank you” I pant out

“Now let’s get to the fun part ya,” Law said as he moved my underwear to the side

“Yea” I weakly say desperately needing Law inside of me

“Alright baby,” Law said as he pulled his pants and underwear down

“Fuck baby your drenched” Law hissed out once he felt my juices against the tip of his cock

“Please law” I whine out not being able to wait any longer

“Of course baby since you took your punishment without any complaints” Law grunted out as he slid his cock into my throbbing core

“Fuck Law Oh My” I moan out as I press my ass harder against his hips

“Fuck baby doll you feel so good” Law whined out as he began forming a pace with his hips sliding in and out of me

“Shit Law I missed this so much” I moan in the blankets as I grip the sheets

“Fuck Princess so have I” Law growled out as he leaned down to warp his fingers around my hands

“Fuck” I whine out from the angle

“Ya you like this position huh” Law hummed in my ear causing vibrations to shoot up my spine

“Yes” I moan out

“So do I baby,” Law said as he began to pick up his pace causing my eyes to cross

“What’s the matter baby am I fucking you stupid” law chuckled as he put his hand behind my head to press me farther into the mattress

I couldn’t even answer his question due to the overwhelming pleasure

“Awe can’t speak can you princess” Law said as he lifted his body back up to grab my hips

“I’m sorry baby you got to handle it just a little longer,” Law said as he began to thrust into me hard causing my body to jerk forward from each motion

“Fuck Law,” I say letting out a loud moan

“I know baby I know,” Law said over the slapping of our skin

“Shit princesses I’m close,” Law said once I felt his thrust grow sloppy

“Me too” I moan out

“Maybe I should shoot my cum in ya so I can see plump and round with my baby growing inside you” Law growled out becoming more turned on by the thought

“Fuck law that sounds so hot” I broke out

“Fuck shit baby” Law growled out as he released inside me

“Oh my gosh law you did not” I gasp out jerking around in one quick motion surprised that he actually did cum inside me

“Shit baby I’m sorry I lost control,” Law said with wide eyes slightly scared I was going to beat the shit out of him

“Fuck” I cuss out in disbelief

I really hope yall liked it comment and let me know if you did 🥰❤️🙏

#one piece oneshots #one peice #oneshot #law x you #law smut #law x reader #law one piece #trafalgar law #trafalgardwaterlaw #trafalgar d law x reader

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forcemasculinisation · 2 months

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I am really starting to question my gender.... Should i act on it? How should i start? I think i want to feel like a real man...

Those are good questions, anon. I can answer the second one first.

How to Start Force Masculinising Yourself (or how others can help you become a man)

There are two main areas you should work on if you want to "feel like a real man". Those are physical changes and mental changes. I'll give you three you can start with, avoiding the obvious option of medical transition (because, quite frankly, it's expensive and difficult to obtain).

Some examples of small physical changes you can start with:

Wearing more masculine clothes: this can include straight-legged low-waisted pants, darker clothes to hide your shape, muscle tees to accentuate your biceps, and other typically masculine attire. You can even start to wear gym clothes your regular clothes for convenience.

Cutting/changing your hair: this can be a very big change. You don't need to do this at all, as there are many masculine individuals with long hair. But cutting your hair is a sure-fire way to make yourself feel more masculine. It's a very instant feeling. Make sure you know exactly what hairstyle you want, and show image references to your barber. (For my black brothers, locing your hair can be good a step closer to masculinity.)

Altering your posture and mannerisms: the way you walk and talk is very important. Keeping your feet further apart when you stand and sit, putting your hands in your pockets, walking slower but with slightly larger strides: these are all things I do that help me personally feel masculine. Make eye contact (if you can) and keep your head up. Laugh loudly. Don't be afraid to fuck up, and don't cower in embarrassment.

Now, some mental changes:

Affirmations: Feels fucking stupid, I know. But following blogs like mine is already a type of affirmation. At this stage, if you've read this far, you know you are a man. So affirming the fact daily is just repeating something you're already aware of. If you don't believe it, then saying it so many times makes it even more true.

Pronoun correction and name changes: If you can, shorten your name, or alter it so it can be seen as masculine. It's never too late to chose a nickname, don't think of what others would think by this abrupt change. Sooner or later, you'll have the same people who were judging you start referring to you as a boy because of your carnal boyish nature. Using he/him pronouns, ironically at first. You'll grow to adore it, right?

Packing: I would have put this in the physical section, but it's something only you would be able to know and feel. Having a cock between your legs... Even stuffing folded socks in your boxers to just feel a bulge of some sorts. People don't understand how much power that makes you feel. You can even just close your eyes and imagine your phantom cock. If it doesn't make you feel stupid, you can imagine holding it, stroking it until you swear it's real.

These are just some. As for your first question about whether you should act on it... Does the above sound exciting to you? If yes, then you should. If not, you should consume forcemasc content for just a few more hours...

#force masc #forced masculinisation #forced masculinization #ftm forced masculinisation #ftm forced masculinization #autoandrophilia #t4t #roachification #ftm cnc #boy hypno #boy hypnosis

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ladykailitha · 6 months

Text

Well Met By Moonlight Part 6

Hey, this story is back too! I know I was supposed to be working on it all of October, but that kinda went to hell as October was an unusually busy month for me.

So have a long chapter as an apology.

Here we have Wayne rocking Jason and Patrick's world and Josh just casually dropping a bomb on Steve.

Also I was noticing that engagement to my stories have dropped off again. I'mma gonna blame Tumblr and the holidays. In all seriousness if my tags aren't tag you let me know. I'll try to find a different way to tag again.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

****

Jason and Patrick showed up at Wayne’s trailer at dawn. The old vampire sat on the porch with a large sun hat and every other part of his skin covered.

Both boys came to an abrupt stop.

“I didn’t know vampires could walk in daylight,” Patrick said, getting his voice back sooner than Jason.

Wayne was on them in an instant. Not as fast as he was at night, but still quicker than a human. He grabbed Patrick’s wrist and yanked it to eye level. A patch of skin showed between Wayne’s sleeve and his weathered work glove. The skin reddened but didn’t blister or catch fire.

Wayne dropped Patrick’s hand. “Our skin is merely more sensitive than yours. I moved slower to make sure none of my skin became exposed.”

Both boys gulped. They thought they were going to have an easier time during the day, but Wayne had put that to bed right quick.

“Get in the truck,” Wayne growled and the boys hurried to obey.

He got into the driver’s seat and drove out past city limits. They pulled up to an old church.

“I’m about to blow another stupid superstition out of the water,” he chuckled. “Follow me.”

He hopped out the truck and they scrambled to follow him. He walked right up to a big wrought iron gate that read: HAWKINS CITY CEMETERY and pulled out a set of keys. After he rifled through them a moment, he unlocked the gate.

He stepped onto hallowed ground and Jason and Patrick gulped audibly as they watched him cross himself.

“Follow me,” Wayne said gruffly.

The two boys hurried to obey.

They strolled through the cemetery to a relatively new part of the grounds. It had roughly ten or so headstones all about the same age, dirty and overgrown.

“You’ll start with scrubbing each of these headstones,” he told them. “I will teach you how to clean them properly and that is what you will do until I say otherwise.”

“Sir?” Patrick asked, raising his hand timidly.

Wayne huffed and cocked an eyebrow at him. “What?”

“Why are they like that?” he asked a little more sure. “Doesn’t anyone come to mourn them?”

Wayne licked his lip slowly. “This is the old Harrington pack. These are all those that sided with alpha Jack Sullivan when he chose to hunt humans in my town.”

“So they are monsters,” Jason sneered.

Wayne was on him in a second, hand wrapped around his throat. “Let me make it clear, boy. Ted Bundy was human. H.H. Holmes was human. Adolf Hitler was human. Fucking Caligula was human. Nasty people do all sorts of nasty ass shit. Monsters don’t exist. Just bad people doing horrible things to others.”

Jason’s eyes were wide. He could feel Wayne’s hand on his throat but it was so feather light he could almost trick his mind that it wasn’t there. That he could escape.

But that part of his brain that lit up when there was a predator nearby wouldn’t let him. It would take all of a single heartbeat for Wayne Munson to crush his windpipe. He would be dead before he even hit the ground.

“Steve Harrington could call you two monsters, after all,” Wayne growled. “Do you think he’d be right for it?”

Patrick refused to look at Jason or Wayne, just stared at the ground, worrying his bottom lip.

Jason’s eyes went wide as he looked into dark pools of Wayne’s eyes. What he found there weren’t the eyes of a beast or a monster, but of man granted the abilities to protect those he loved better than most.

If death was a suitable punishment for hunting and then attempted rape and murder of a woman, than why were they granted a boon when those laying there in the dirt did not.

“Why spare us?” Jason breathed. “Why not do us like you did them?”

“The mayor wanted me to,” Wayne explained. “Tearing you two apart would be as easy as ripping up a newspaper for kindling.”

“So why didn’t you?” Patrick asked, looking up at them.

“Because to me you are but infants in the grand scheme of things,” he said. “Killing you would have sent a message to the town, to the nation that hunting people like animals is not to be tolerated.”

He let go of Jason’s neck. “But do you want to know what else it would have done?”

The two boys shared a glance.

“It would have galvanized all the hunters in the country,” Wayne informed them. “They would have turned you two into martyrs. You would become their rallying cry. Hunters would have invaded our small town, killed anyone they thought was a vampire or werewolf. They wouldn’t have stopped to check either. No trials. No tests with silver. Anyone they thought was a supe, they’d be dead. This place would be in ruins in days.”

Jason and Patrick’s jaws dropped.

“And before you get any bright ideas,” he warned them, “all I have to do is turn you over to the law. Two months of a trial plus the automatic death sentence for hunting and you two are dead without the fuss.”

Patrick had started to believe him, but he knew Jason was going to a hard sell. But he had time.

“Now that’s all been cleared up,” Wayne said. “Let me show you how to clean these headstones and then you’ll be doing it all yourselves.”

They nodded and Wayne got to work. Once he was sure they had it, he perched on a nearby tree stump and watched.

“That boy shouldn’t be here,” Murray growled.

Steve sighed heavily. “So you have several times since sun up. The point of this is to teach him that werewolves aren’t the monsters from their fiction.”

They were standing in front of the compound entrance for Josh Bentley to arrive. Josh would work his first six weeks with the pack and his second six weeks with the coven. Chance would do the reverse.

Josh showed up on time, his parents trailing behind like frightened deer in the headlights.

Steve stepped forward. “Hey, Josh. Mr and Mrs Bentley. It’s nice to see you.”

Mr Bentley gripped Josh’s shoulders from behind tightly as Mrs Bentley held Josh’s hand tightly. They nodded mutely.

“So here’s how it’s going to go,” Steve continued as if they had greeted him back. “On the weekends he is here from sun up to sun down and then every day after school. He can tell you what he does here. Nothing he’ll see is a secret. However there will be areas that are off limits for his protection…” He cocked his head to side. “Mainly due to not having the strength to get there.”

They stared at him blankly and he laughed. “He’ll see what I mean later.” He held out his hand. “Come on, it’s time to show you around.”

Josh looked back at his dad, who nodded. He let go of his mom’s hand and walked toward Steve.

“This is Murray Bauman,” Steve explained. “He’s the sentry right now.”

“Why do you need a sentry if it’s not secret?” Josh asked.

Murray’s grin was slimy. “Yes, Steve, why do you need a sentry if it isn’t secret?”

“It not a secret what’s in a museum or art gallery either,” Steve said with a shrug, “but they still have people protecting it.”

“So it’s valuable?” Josh asked, eyes wide.

He ruffled the kid’s hair. “Not in the way you mean. It’s valuable because all life is valuable. One of our pups was a test subject of the last Dominus and we don’t want our own taken like that again.”

Josh nodded. They started walking through the woods, leaving a disgruntled Murray behind.

“That makes sense,” Josh said. “If someone hurt my family like that, I’m not sure I wouldn’t want to lock them to keep them safe, too.”

Steve nodded back. “Right. All the wolves are free to come and go as they will, but we screen outsiders now because it’s been scary for us.”

Josh ducked his head. “Like what we did.”

Steve stopped their trek through the woods and turned to him. “Very like. But that’s why you’re here and not Andy or Patrick or Jason. Because you realized on some level what they were doing was wrong, but went along with it because you wanted to be cool like you thought they were.”

Josh nodded. “I like basketball. It’s fun and Jason was the captain, you know. I thought it was going to be a little hazing thing. Because you were on the team, too. They made it sound like you knew it was coming and was in on it.”

Steve felt a cold sliver of dread down slip his spine. “What?”

Josh bit his lip.

“Yeah, they told us that the trap was fake and that it wasn’t real silver. Things started to get bad when they kept taking it farther and farther. The cross, the beatings...I don’t know what would have happened if that vampire had come and chased us off.”

Steve grabbed the boy’s shoulders. “Their plan was to kill me. The only reason Andy got off so lightly is that he ran when Eddie...” Josh frowned in confusion, “the vampire, swooped in to rescue me.”

Josh’s eyes went wide. “Shit, man! I swear I had no idea.”

“That’s what Sheriff Powell reported to Mayor Roberts,” Steve said. “That you and Chase had no idea what was going on. Both of you seemed to think it was a prank gone wrong.”

Josh nodded. “Honest, we did! We thought the hunter thing was just pretend. A macho club. I thought that it was a way to air out grievances. Talk about how wrong it was for them to be ruling our town.”

Steve cocked his head to the side. “But Powell and Roberts are both human. Until the attempt on my life this town was run by humans.”

Josh’s eyes went wider than Steve thought was possible on a human. “But I thought werewolves were traditionally the sheriff and vampires were the mayor!”

Steve stepped back. “Who told you that?”

Josh furrowed his brow. “It’s what they taught us in history, man.”

Steve raised his chin and heaved out a heavy sigh. “And this history lesson it wouldn’t happen to take place on a day most supernatural beings were out of class, say...the day after a full moon?”

Josh frowned as he thought back to all the times in history he heard about vampires and werewolves taking over the running of the town. “I don’t really remember, but I guess so.”

Steve’s second sigh was no less heavy. It looked like he was going to have to join the PTA.

“Come on,” he said. “Let me introduce you to the rest of the pack.”

Hopper and Joyce stayed back, but the rest rushed to meet Josh. Well, everyone but Lucas.

Lucas he already knew from basketball. The young man stood off to the side. Not hanging back like Joyce and Hopper, but not rushing to meet him either.

Lucas didn’t know how to act so he was waiting for a signal from his alpha. From his friend. From Steve.

Steve introduced the pack. The Wheelers, the Byers brothers, the Hendersons, the rest of the Sinclairs, and even Jane.

The remaining three, Joyce, Hopper, and Lucas waited to see what their alpha would do.

“In an unprecedented turn of events,” Steve said with a lopsided smile, “we have the previous alpha male and female, Jim Hopper, you know, and Joyce Byers.”

Josh cocked his head to the side. “Awk-ward.”

Steve laughed. And even Joyce couldn’t quite hide her smile.

Josh looked around. “I don’t see anything that I could do for you guys,” he said honestly.

Steve turned to three members of the pack that he hadn’t introduced yet. “This Tommy Hagen, Carol Perkins, and Robin Buckley. They’re keepers. What they do for the pack is what you’ll be learning how to do the time you’re here.”

Josh looked at the three older teenagers skeptically. “What can they do?”

Steve grinned. “Mortal families looking for prestige will send their sons or daughters to the pack to become keepers. They aren’t werewolves, they can’t change at will or in the light of the full moon, but they are stronger, faster, and more agile then your average human.”

“More durable too!” Robin said excitedly. “I haven’t broken a single bone since I became a keeper. It’s so cool!”

Josh frowned. “Do you guys remain keepers until you die or what happens?”

Tommy and Carol shared a glance, before Carol said, “You can stay a keeper all your life, you live longer than the average human, but not as long as a werewolf. Or you can go back to being human when you leave the pack to go to college or whatever. It looks killer on any resumé or application.”

“Or...” Tommy said, “you can ask to be made a werewolf. The alpha can always say no, but you can always ask. And even if the alpha does say yes, it doesn’t mean that it’ll take. But it’s not as though you’ll be maimed or killed if it doesn’t. So some people take the risk.”

“Today,” Steve said, gently steering the conversation away from transformations, “you’ll help Carol get supplies and she’ll show you where they’re put.”

“Shopping run?” Josh asked. Carol nodded. “Hell yeah. Count me in.”

Steve laughed at his enthusiasm. “Don’t say that or you’ll become her shopping buddy for life.”

Carol grinned wolfishly, but Josh just grinned back.

Josh ran off with Carol and they were chatting like old friends.

Nancy came up behind Steve and put her arm around his waist. “This was a really good idea. He gets to see how much we are the same and how special we are without all the negative mind dump the general public feeds him.”

Steve hummed. “I’m concerned about some of the things he was telling me on the way in about how negative the portrayal of us is. I need to talk to Wayne, but since he’s busy with Jason and Patrick, Eddie will have to do.”

Nancy poked his ribs and he squirmed.

“You just want to see your boyfriend,” she teased.

Steve kissed the top of her head. “Guilty as charged. But it is important I talk to him and Wayne about what Josh said. Hold down the fort for me?”

“Always.”

He gave her a hug and shifted, running for the direction of Forest Hills Trailer Park.

****

Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13

Tag List: @spectrum-spectre @estrellami-1 @zerokrox-blog @artiststarme @swimmingbirdrunningrock @gregre369 @pyrohonk @a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @goodolefashionedloverboi @bookbinderbitch @chaoticlovingdreamer @maya-custodios-dionach @messrs-weasley @val-from-lawrence @i-must-potato @danili666 @carlyv @rozzieroos @wonderland-girl143-blog @itsall-taken @justforthedead89 @emly03 @bookworm0690 @littlewildflowerkitten @vecnuthy @redfreckledwolf @scheodingers-muppet @mira-jadeamethyst @just-a-tiny-void @potato-of-the-lord @goosesister @tinyplanet95 @anaibis @she-collects-smut @irregular-child

#my writing #stranger things #steddie #ladykailtiha writes #werewolf steve harrington #vampire eddie munson

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black-aurora-nora · 1 year

Text

Doll House Pt. 1| Platonic!Yandere Shinaguzawa Brothers x Reader

For @tengensimp (this will be the last no age request I do. From now on if someone requests and doesn’t have their age in the bio, I won’t do it and will block you)

“(Y/N)?” A hand grabbed at your shoulder and shook you gently and you quickly slapped the hand away.

“I’m already awake.” You snapped tiredly, bringing your warm blanket up to cover your head.

Every morning, you wake up to the same voice and face. A face that you once liked but have now grown to hate.

“Then get up, I need to change your bandages.” Genya sighed, as if he were dealing with a troublesome teenager.

You didn’t move, only closing your eyes once again as you slowed your breathing. Maybe Genya would take the hint for once and leave you alone.

But of course, like the caring person he believed he was, Genya did not take the hint and roughly tugged at your cover, “(Y/N).” He warned.

Tired of hearing his voice, you sat up and pulled the covers away from your bandaged feet with a huff, “Here. Hurry up and fuck off.”

Genya huffed back as he slowly began to take off the bandages, studying the deep slices at the bottom of your feet. They definitely looked better than 2 weeks ago, but you still weren’t ready to walk yet.

“You’re feet are healing good. You may be able to walk sooner than Sanemi and I thought.” He stated.

“Great.” You replied sarcastically.

Genya glared at you, “What’s going on? Why the hell are you so mad lately? Are your feet still bothering you?"

You knew that the insanity was probably clouding his mind, but you couldn’t help but stare at him like he was stupid. How could someone be so oblivious?

“Yeah, my feet that have been sliced and fractured are still bothering me,” You droned, “But it may also be the fact that I don’t want to be here with people that kidnapped me.”

Genya only sighed at that, “I know it’s boring being stuck in the house all day, but that doesn’t mean that you should say hurtful things to your bro-“

“You are not my brother!” You snapped, “Neither you or Sanemi are family to me. I’d rather you leave me for the maggots than pretend to love you.” You growled.

Genya only stared at you, his eyes reading a mix of pain and sadness. They sharpened with hot anger; a look that could kill.

“You think you don’t need me?” He challenged.

You didn't like his tone, but you were far too angry to not bite back. “I don’t. You guys are the ones who made me this way!” Everything was their fault. You were taking care of yourself just fine before Sanemi attacked you that night.

“You don't need me?" He repeated knowingly, as if you were a child having a tantrum. Slowly, he rose from his spot and shrugged, a hard look on his face, "Alright, we'll see about that."

The door slid shut and you were left alone once again with just your thoughts.

You huffed, rolling back over to sleep again.

Genya didn't speak to you for most of the day. The only time he helped you was when you begged to use the bathroom, but other than that, he acted as if you were a fly on the wall.

Not eating for the day sucked, but you didn't mind it too much. It was nice to get time away from Genya's coddling.

On day 6, you decided that enough was enough. Genya was acting ridiculous.

He and his brother were the one's that put you in this fucked up situation. He couldn't just decide to stop caring for you just because you hurt his feelings. It's like he wasn't even thinking about how you felt being kidnapped.

Your feet were beginning to itch and ache from lack of care. You couldn’t wrap them yourself since Genya purposely stored them where you couldn’t reach the bandages or the ointment.

You couldn’t really eat anything of real nutritional value either since he’d put most of the food in unreachable places.

Now, you were beginning to realize that he’d planned all of this. He wanted you to beg for him. He needed you to need him.

You'd weakly crawled out onto the engawa, watching him train.

"Genya." You called out. He stopped and looked at you with expecting eyes, "You know that you have to help me, so just do it. I don't care anymore.”

Instead of helping you like you’d asked, he went back to training.

Your mouth gaped like a fish and you called for him again, “I won’t complain anymore, I promise. I’ll do everything you and Sanemi say, okay?”

Nothing.

“Genya… please. I’m hungry.” You begged softly, “My feet hurt and I can’t change the bandages by myself… I don’t want them to get infected, Genya, please.”

There was still no response and you felt your resolve melting little by little each time Genya didn’t answer you.

Your feet hurt so bad and your stomach churned got something other than soup.

“Genya…” Your voice wobbled, “Please help me. I need your help.” You told him with bitter tears, “I need your help with my bandages and I need your help to eat…”

He finally stopped training and looked at you with knowing eyes, “You do?” He asked in a mocking tone. “My little sister needs her big brother?”

“Yes.” You bit out.

He picked you up with a warm smile, “I’m glad you realized that you do need us.” Instead of taking you back to your room, he headed back outside.

“Where are we going?” You asked.

Genya chuckled at the question, as if you were a child, “You stink! We’re going to take quick bath and then we’ll worry about eating and changing your bandages.”

#yandere #yandere scenario #yandere x reader #yandere x y/n #platonic yandere #yandere kny #yandere demon slayer #genya shinazugawa #kny sanemi #kny genya x reader #anime #kidnap tw #tw cursing #tw injury #tw manipulation #tw infantilization #female reader

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lazyalani · 10 months

Text

| Blue Lock

| Them as Taylor Swift song lines

| fluffy, becuz taylor swift is life itself, i refuse to believe reo and chigiri arent swfities, swearing cuz its me, i had to redo this cuz tumblr literally deleted the first one :'), slight angst? I like the old version of this better :(

Ft. Reo, Nagi, Chigiri, Aiku, Sae, Rin, Bachira, Ness, Kaiser, Otoya, Yukimiya, Isagi

| Blue Lock Masterlist

| Main Masterlist

REO "you've got a smile that could light up this whole town" - you belong with me

Man you can't tell me his smile just not sends you to cloudnine. That one panel of him smiling at Nagi got me cursing that bitch for making Reo cry. He's so precious I'm crying. Nagi better have tripped 50 times after walking away from him. His smile is so genuine. Reo is so easy to read off field. His emotions are always easily seen based on his expressions and how he acts. Just by looking at his face and eyes, you could really tell how he feels. The way his face lights up and his eyes sparkle when he smiles got butterflies on my tummy. Fuck you Nagi.

MEGURU "we're happy, free, confused, and lonely in the best way" - 22

Bachira is always a mix of emotions. I genuinely believes he can feel and handle a lot of emotions at the same time and still only show one, and he chooses what to show. He's always smiling or calm despite the chaos on field and everything. He's so chill. He'd be the fun person to be around everytime. He's a flexible person. He could be fun when it's the mood, and bring out his lonely feeling when you talk deep. But he's so optimistic he lits up the mood again. He's the type to just go with the flow of anything and worry about something when it's there. The fact that he finds a way to make himself kind of okay is amazing cuz I would honestly lash out on everyone in the field.

RIN "back then we didn't know, we were built to fall apart" - the very first time

Ah, he's definitely the angsty childhood friends to strangers trope. The moment Sae broke him he was bound to break everything around him. Even if he hurts people unintentionally, the damage is still done, no? He inherited his brother's sharp tongue and bad attitude so if you aren't a masochist or a simp, better stay away cuz this man could make you cry with a sentence. It doesn't really help that he literally grew up all over Sae. It's not like Rin is the type to say "go away cuz you're distracting me from my revenge" or something, but his change drives people away from hi.

SEISHIRO "it's me, hi. i'm the problem it's me" - anti-hero

Literally sucks at communicating. He'd be the person who would slack off at communicating and do whatever he wants when he thinks you know him enough. He's probably think you know he'd buy a new house when he complains about the broken cieling. You better get that laziness out of your spoiled ass and start trying harder AND IF YOU DONT WANT REO ILL TAKE HIM. Get your game face on GET YOUR GAME FACE ON. Don't confuse and play with my Reo's feelings you asshole.

HYOMA "i'm captivated by you baby like a firework show" - sparks fly

You cannot tell me you don't internally scream when you see this pretty man. I believe in Chigiri Hyoma supremacy, I believe that he gets all the attention he deserves everywhere he goes, and I refuse to believe that no one in blue lock had even a slight crush on him. He's just so pretty and gorgeous and cute and talented and fast and charming and dreamy and fast and red. Please let me touch your hair you can kick me afterwards. I went into daydream mode the first time I saw him.

EITA "goodbye, mr. perfectly fine, how's your heart after breaking mine?" - mr. perfectly fine

I don't even have to explain. I would've burned his whole soul down if he did that to me.

AIKU "long story short, it was the wrong guy" - long story short

Don't even get me started on this one. He's so obvious. Tbh, in real life, you'd be pretty stupid if you didn't notice sooner. Getting with him on a committed relationship, a fubu, or a fwb would be a risky 50/50 if you're weak for guys like him, better run, but if you're a flagpole then why not? You could fall for him for all he cares, he just wants to have fun.

SAE "why'd i have to break what i love so much?" - afterglow

Now he'd defnitely be the one to lash out. Aside from the Rin drama, if Sae had a childhood sweetheart or something like that, they would either end up like Rin or slowly experience and see the change in Sae. From his usual teasing manner to the dry, lesser and lesser text and messages. He'd be the type to lash out and tell you to go away when you pry too much for his taste. Sharp tongued, bad attitude, sharper actions, so realistic to the point that he does so much damage around him and what's worse is that he doesn't care. He knowd what he's doing and he just doesn't care enough. It's not he doesn't love or like Rin or his 'if' childhood sweetheart, it's just the way he is after his change. He's like a fire burning everything on his path, and he just keeps going.

YUKIMIYA "darling, i fancy you" - london boy

Like, have you seen this man? He's a 3 in 1. Angst, Fluff and Sm-- hehehehe. He's so pretty, soft boy at first look and then sexy at the second, then angsty health drama in the third. My yukki is so strong for handling his sickness so well :') come here and lemme give you a hug.

MICHAEL "he's so obsessed with me and, boy, i understand" - i think he knows

Ness, I completely understand, it's completely justified. This man is gorgeous and he fucking knows it. He's probably the center of attention when he walks in and he loves every bit of it. BUT THE NEXT TIME HE BULLIES NESS IM RIPPING OF THAT REMAINING HAIR ON HIS BACK :D Aside from him annoying himsagi everytime and being a menance to everyone, who wouldn't love him? Talented, handsome, and don't even get me started on that 300M.

ALEXIS "'cause darling i'm a nightmare dressed like a daydream" - blank space

Oh boy only a little more and he's gonna fucking snap and rip himsagi's neck off. His smile is so babyboy and innocent but when he closest his eyes you better run. Many people probably think he's just one of those die hard Kaiser defenders who bark and be a stupid, good for nothing moron in the field but my Ness is very strong and boy he BITES. Reo version 5. Kaiser, make up your mind seriously, I'll take him if you don't want him.

YOICHI "i swear i don't love the drama, it loves me" - end game

Pretty self-explanatory. I feel so bad for him. My boy just wants to play soccer and suddenly he's a double love story antagonist and a brother stealer :') ever since Rin and Nagi came into the picture he lost Bachira. Like, just go away and give him back Bachira. Then there goes Kaiser and Ness drama, an upgraded version of reonagi. Reonagi drama level 3. Cuz level one is them, them level two is Kunigiri. GIVE HIM THE BALL AND LEAVE HIM ALONE. Need to build a government himsagi protection squad cuz Ness is probably gonna break his legs sooner or later.

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wolfchanslover69 · 5 months

Text

My brother’s best friend

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In which the reader has to stay with her brother and his best friend for a while due to renovations at her home.

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Pairing: Bang Chan x reader | fluff, angst and happy ending

A/N: Heyy guys, I hope you enjoy reading this oneshot! If I made any mistakes do tell me because I won't realise it :D.

Warning: Mentions of middle fingers, rude people (I guess that's all)

Word count: 4,2k

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The renovations have started at my house, which means I can't live there for the next two weeks. That's why I'm currently standing behind my brother's door with two big bags full of my stuff, waiting for his slow ass to open the door for me. I could hear talking—or more like yelling—coming from behind the door. After two seconds, the door slammed open with my slightly annoyed brother, who was trying not to show happiness in seeing me.

"Get inside, loser," he told me while making a tsk sound. I just showed him my tongue and middle finger while starting to drag my bags with me.

"Why do you need so much stuff for two weeks?" he asked me, watching with his cat-like eyes squinted at me. "I'm a woman… I have clothes, my stuff for university and work, and so on... and you know, health stuff." He was about to say something, but his mouth formed an 'o,' letting out a soft "oh" as an answer.

The moment I had gotten everything inside and closed the door, my brother's handsome roommate and best friend appeared behind a hallway. He looked cute in his oversized black hoodie, shorts, and beanie. "Oh, hi y/n, I didn't know you already came here," he smiled at me with a bright smile that could easily have brightened the whole world. "Oh yeah, I just came," I rubbed my arm while pointing at the door. He just giggled at me before saying, "I noticed."

Minho stared at me and rolled his eyes. He was painfully aware of my crush on his friend and pretended to be annoyed with it. In reality, he was rather glad I was crushing on his friend and not on some stupid boy who would end up breaking my heart. But still, even though I was secretly in love with his painfully beautiful and god-like best friend, he would never allow me to date him. I'm not sure what that's really about, but I find it annoying. Not that I would ever have the courage to reveal to his friend about my secret feelings.

"Is the renovation starting then?" Chan asked me as he came to stand next to me. "Oh! Let me take that!" he told me before I could answer, seeing me moving my bags.

"You don't nee— I— oh— okay, sure, and uh, yeah, they started today in the morning. I had to go through the plan with them before I got to leave," I answered, trying to stop him from helping me at the same time. He didn't need to help me when I was the one coming to break his privacy by staying at his house for two weeks.

"No, no, don't worry. Hey Minho, why don't you help too! And that sounds great, the sooner it's done, the sooner your home is ready again, right?" Minho scowled at Chan before coming to help me with the bag. "Haha yes, but luckily two weeks isn't that long."

"Mmm, true. Well, I hope you enjoy staying here. I'll talk to you later; now, I have to continue with my work again. I have to get this track done by this Sunday," he told me while scratching the back of his head and giving me an apologetic smile. Minho just stood next to me silently, like he had never been in the room before, pushing me slightly after Chan had left.

"Don't flirt with him around me; it's gross," he complained.

"I hardly believe that; nothing can be as gross as you are." Minho gave me a stare before telling me he wouldn't help me anymore. This led us to bickering like little children, and ended up with him helping me bring my bags to the living room next to the sofa.

—------------------------------------------------

That night, neither Minho nor I had the energy to start cooking dinner or even step out of the house. This led us to order takeout. It also led us to have a movie night like we used to when we were younger. It would usually start with us bickering over which movie to watch and end with Minho giving up and letting me choose the movie. He had always played tough with me but ended up giving in and being soft. He was soft even now when we were fighting over how we would sit on the sofa. I wanted to lay on my side with my legs straight, but so did Minho.

"Would you lay like that on the sofa if your 'Channie' was here?" he sneered at me, squinting his catlike eyes.

"Yes, I would, and he's not 'mine,' so stop bullying me or I'll put you in the damn air fryer," I threatened him.

"I want to see you try when we both know I can put you in there faster than you can put me."

I didn't even bother to answer him and just showed him my middle finger. As a peace offering, I sat on the sofa instead of laying down, and to my surprise, he sat as well. I knew our next fight was going to be about what movie we were going to watch next, and I wasn't waiting for it. I wanted to watch old nostalgic Disney movies while he wanted to watch the newer ones. While we were bickering, we didn't hear Chan entering the room before he was right behind us.

"Oh hey, can we watch Deadpool?" Before Minho could open his mouth, I had already agreed with him.

"Sweet! Oh, is that the food you ordered? I can get it!" he said as the sound of knocking could be heard from the front door.

"You only agreed because it's Chan, traitor. You know I have seen it at least a thousand times…" I just looked at him with a blank face while saying 'oops.'

Chan came happily back with a goofy smile plastered over his face and our food. He set the food on the table in the living room and started opening the packages with funny jazz hands. I chuckled at the happy sight in front of me and smiled softly to him. I heard a loud groan from next to me, and I dropped the smile and gave Minho yet another middle finger.

When all of us had food in front of us, we finally started the movie. We ended up sitting in a way where Chan was between me and Minho. To say I was feeling nervous would be an understatement. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest and hands shaking like leaves. During the movie, all I could concentrate on was me and Chan's legs brushing each other whenever one of us moved. Whenever I felt the touch, all I wanted to do was to jump closer to him, but that would be weird. Therefore, I tried to be as far away from him as I could to keep myself from acting out of normal. That didn't work, though, as it seemed that he was getting closer and closer. The last straw for me was when I felt Chan's hands touch mine as we were reaching into the cup of snacks at the same time. I tried to act normal, but I knew both Minho and Chan could hear the shakiness in my voice as I told him he could take from it first. I couldn't think after that, and missed the whole ending of the movie.

After the movie, I still felt like I was in heaven from the smallest touches. Yes, I know it's pathetic, but I couldn't help it. Minho went to get a blanket and a pillow for me as I tried to convince Chan that I could sleep on the couch, and it wasn't a problem for me as they had already helped me so much.

"Come on, Chan, I can sleep here; two weeks are not going to be that bad, you know," I tried to take the duvet cover from him.

"No, really, y/n. I have slept here on this exact sofa, and I know how much it will hurt the next morning when you wake up," he tried to reason with me.

"Yes, why it is important that you don't sleep here so you'll be able to finish your work, remember?" He just didn't seem to give up.

"But I don't sleep anyway, so there will be no harm done if you sleep in my bed." At this point, I couldn't do anything other than use my secret weapon.

"But Chaaaan," I told him while giving the best puppy eyes I could. He sighed and rubbed his face as I could feel his other hand letting go of the duvet covers.

"Fine, but if your shoulders hurt tomorrow, you are going to sleep the rest of the stay in my bed, okay," I stared at him, smiling before answering, "Fine." I won't tell him if my shoulders hurt; he doesn't need to give his bed to me.

—------------------------------------------------

The next morning, I did wake up with stiff shoulders, which were the cause of my never-ending headache. The whole day went with me being distracted during lectures because of the pain and the aftermath of dreaming about Chan. The entire day I was in another brain land, making me extra clumsy and forgetful. I even mixed up my schedule and went to the wrong places at the wrong time. When I did it for the second time, I decided it was probably smartest to skip the rest of the day.

So now, I was trying to figure out how to relieve my stiff shoulders while sitting on the exact sofa that was the whole cause of the situation. I searched through the whole net, only to find either not possible or expensive ways. With a sigh, I put my laptop away, giving up on trying to ease my pain. What I didn't notice was the front door opening and a person coming in. It wasn't until I heard Chan's voice that I realized.

"Hey, are you okay?" he asked worriedly. I let out a scream as I heard him. I hadn't noticed him coming behind me or even entering the house. "Holy shit, you scared the living crap out of me!" I exclaimed while putting a hand over my heart to try to calm down the pounding. "Ahaha, sorry," he told me while sheepishly scratching the back of his head.

"What are you doing here so early?" I asked him curiously. I thought I would be here for a few more hours alone before Minho or Chan would be back.

"Well, I could ask the same from you, but we finished with Jisung and Changbin faster than I thought at the studio, so I came to finish things at home," he explained to me. I let out a silent 'aah' as an answer to him.

"Um, well, I couldn't concentrate at the campus, so I came here to do my essay, but I can't concentrate," I tried to reason. He eyed me for a while in silence while pouting his lips.

"Your shoulders hurt and are stiff, causing you a headache, right?" I stared at him in the eyes in silence. Shaking my head slowly, I tried to deny his assumption, even though it was right. He tilted his head to the side and gave me a pointed look.

"So now, if I tried to massage your shoulders, they would be soft and not rock hard, hmm?" I nodded my head. If he knew my shoulders were rock hard, he would start lecturing me and insist on me taking his bed.

Before I knew it, I felt a pair of hands on my shoulders testing if they were as 'soft' as I had claimed. I let out a whimper in pain as he squeezed my shoulders. They were indeed stiff, and it felt like somebody was putting little needles into my shoulders.

"Gosh, didn't I tell you this would happen if you sleep on the couch?" I didn't need to turn my head to know he was shaking his head.

"You should relax your shoulders; this isn't going to work if your whole body is as stiff as a tree," he complained. I tried to hide my creeping blush of getting caught being nervous. He didn't need to know that 'he' was the reason why I couldn't sleep in his bed or relax while he was trying to ease the pain.

He continued his lecture while massaging my shoulders. I still didn't give up with the couch, and it ended up with Chan calling Minho to tell him that I was going to be sleeping next to him. Now, I don't have much against sleeping next to my brother, but I still would prefer to have my own space. Their call went even as far as Chan threatening Minho if he wouldn't let me sleep next to him.

—------------------------------------------------

The next evening, I was in charge of making dinner for everyone. Minho was laying on the couch while complaining about his day to me as I prepared food for everyone. I had decided to make the most simple food that I could come up with, which was pasta. I was stirring the sauce when Minho let out a more dramatic sigh than usual. "I really wish I had an air fryer that would fit a person in it; I would have needed it today."

"Was your day really that bad, or are you just being dramatic?" I genuinely asked. He didn't answer for a while and kept silent.

"They came up with a new gossip about me; apparently, I have beaten up someone who looked at me in the wrong way." So his day was really a bad one.

"It's sad how adults keep coming up with stupid rumors, and I know they hurt you, but at least you'll be more successful than them because while they gossip, you are living your life fully with good friends who support you," I tried to brighten his mood.

"Mmh, I'm not really sad. It's just funny how they come up with such pathetic ideas when all I do is study and practice with my dance team," he shrugged, sounding calmer than before.

After that, Minho changed the topic and started talking about his cats, who were visiting our parents at the moment. He gave me a deep analysis of how he missed them and wished they were with him at the moment. While he was still analyzing his cats, Chan came to the kitchen and walked past me to get water. I accidentally dropped my spoon that I had just used to taste-test the pasta sauce as Chan had walked past me to the fridge. He had touched my waist like it was the most normal thing to do, making me jump in surprise. His hand was still lingering on me as he turned to pick up the spoon which I had dropped.

"You okay? Here," he asked while giving the spoon back to me.

"Oh yeah, the spoon just slipped; I have a bit oily hands," I told him while gesturing to the olive oil bottle next to my pot.

"Ahh, that explains," he sipped his water while moving away from me to sit at the dinner table while starting to talk with Minho.

I was left alone in the kitchen with a pounding heart and yet again shaking hands. I felt like I could explode with all the adrenaline running through me. I had to lean on the counter while trying to steady my breathing. I was in disbelief. If the rest of my stay was going to be like this or even worse, I don't think I'll get out of this alive. On top of everything, I have a strong feeling that Chan knows very well what he is doing to me at the moment…

—------------------------------------------------

The next few days, I didn’t see Chan at all. He most likely had spent the days and nights at his studio with his friends, editing or recording stuff, who knows. I used these 'Chan-free' days as days to get my own work done without stressing out if I would see him or not. I didn’t need additional distractions at the moment; I just needed to get past this module, and then everything would slow down a bit.

Finally, it was the end of the week, and I had gone out for dinner with my friends. This was the first time in a while that all of us had a free spot in our calendars to meet up. The restaurant had just opened on the other side of the city and was small and cozy. We were sitting in a small booth with all of us squeezed around the table. All of us were giving updates on our lives to each other while also reminiscing about our high school years.

“Soo y/n, do you have a boyfriend yet?” my friend Julia asked. She gave me a thin smile while tilting her head to the side, as if evaluating if my answer would make me a better person or not.

“Well, not yet. I have been concentrating on my studies lately…” I told her truthfully.

“Oh, so that means you are still too scared to tell Channie?” she asked, or more like stated. I could hear my other friends chuckling next to me.

As I was about to answer her, my other friend, Norah, answered. “It’s not like you actually had a chance with him; you do know that, right?” I stared at them quietly. What were they saying? They had never talked to me like that and had always supported me.

“What do you mean by that?” I wondered while scowling at them.

“Well… you know, why would he want to be with you like you are his best friend’s sister…” I stared at them, not saying anything. What were they on about? They had never been like this; it sounds like they are…

“Are you jealous? Or do you feel like I’m threatening you?” I genuinely asked them. I looked at my ‘best’ friends, wondering what was going on. Was I in a nightmare, or were they really like this before too?

“Of course not, why would I be jealous of you?” Norah answered while giving me a dirty look.

She and my other friends had never been like this before, or had they? I looked at all of them in the eyes and realized maybe they had been like this all along, I just hadn’t realized it. They had never actually been supportive; no, they just were waiting for me to lose all of my hope so they could get to my brother and his friends through me. I laughed in disbelief as I started packing my stuff to leave.

“You guys are unbelievable, hah, are you even hearing yourselves? All this for what, a few men that would never go for people like you and why? Because they have standards, unlike me, who spent most of her life with people who didn’t actually care about me.” At this point, I wasn’t even sure if I was talking to them or myself. I felt so betrayed that it made me feel like a ton of stones was placed on my chest to stop me from breathing. I stood up and grabbed my coat, and as I was leaving, I told them one last thing.

“Oh, and never call him Channie; that’s my nickname for him, not yours.” After that, I left. I wasn’t going to talk to them ever again; they had lost the privilege for that. I didn’t need shitty people like that in my life.

As I exited the restaurant, I started walking back to my brother’s and his friends' place. At some point, it had started pouring rain like the sky was crying with my soul for the lost friendships. With shaky hands, I tried to unlock my phone to call Minho to get me out of the rain, but my phone didn’t want to work as it got wetter and wetter with each passing second in the rain. The whole night was a disaster, making me want to start crying, but I wouldn’t let myself. I put my phone away and kept walking in the dark evening toward home. I was starting to shake due to the cold rain and wet clothes. Why didn’t I just order a taxi? It would have been a safer and dryer way to get home than walking in the dark rain. What if this was my last time seeing th-

“Y/N!” I looked up to where the voice was coming from. And there he was, standing right in front of me in the pouring rain. He looked worried and was clutching his phone in his hand. His wet hair was clinging to his forehead due to the rain, making him look like a lost puppy, even though he was an adult man.

“Chan…” I whispered his name.

“Why didn’t you answer your phone? I was worried, and so was Minho, he call- hey, why are you crying?” In the middle of his speech, I could feel my lower lip starting to wobble as my hands started to shake more. I couldn’t keep it inside me anymore. The crying just wouldn’t stop; it felt like it was taking over everything. I took shaky steps toward Chan with my hands out to him. He didn’t waste a second and hugged me as I cried into his shoulder. The night was shitty, and I had never imagined it would end like this. I could feel his chin on top of my head as he tried to calm me down. I just hugged him even tighter as my sobs got louder.

“Hey, it’s okay, cry everything out, okay?” I kept crying while nodding my head. Who would have thought my day would end up like this, crying in my brother’s best friend’s arms because a few mean people had betrayed me and told me I could never be with the person I wanted to be with…

“Promise me you’ll never leave me,” I leaned away from him while still sobbing to look into his eyes. He looked at me with a worried look hidden in his eyes.

“Hey, where is this coming from, love?” He asked worriedly while petting my hair.

“Promise,” I almost started crying harder as I tightened my hold on his hoodie.

He put his hands to my cheeks and made me look into his eyes, “I’m never going to leave you, okay. Not now and not ever.” I nodded my head while starting to calm down. It took me a few moments and a few deep breaths to finally be able to calm down fully. Chan kept petting my head and hugging me while I did so. When I was finally able to calm down, I spilled everything, from the way my friends had treated me to the root cause of the whole thing.

“I thought they were my friends and I guess at some point they were, but I don’t know what I did wrong. They were so mean, and I just don’t know. And please don’t hate me and promise that you’ll never leave Minho after I tell you everything.” He squeezed me harder as he promised never to leave Minho.

“You know, I have liked you ever since I first saw you when I was five. The day when you came to visit Minho after a school day, I remember that you were so shy yet so social, and I just couldn’t say anything to you and ran to my room to hide. But at some point, you and Minho came into my room and forced me to play with you, and I just thought you were so cool, and I just, I don’t know, I just decided you were my person that day. And I have all my life tried to hide the fact that I actually have feelings for you, and I told my ‘friends,’ and they supposedly supported me, but in reality, they were just waiting for my downfall…” I closed my eyes and waited for his reaction. I knew I had taken a huge risk when telling him all of this, hoping he wouldn’t hate me after everything.

“I know…” He told me quietly and hugged me more tightly. “You know, that day you weren’t the only one to catch feelings and try to hide them for most of their life…” I looked him in the eyes while sniffling. Was this really happening to me, was I in a dream, or was this real.

“Really…?” I asked quietly.

“Really,” He gave me a small smile while securing his grip on me. Maybe everything would be fine, maybe the future isn’t as gray as I thought it would be, and maybe just maybe I could face it with Chan… or Channie as I have wanted to call him most of my life aloud.

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