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#I know this is an old point but like whyyyy
scarletwoods · a month ago
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Why does Halloween Town have a king AND a Mayor
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lia-miya · 7 months ago
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flustered
karasuno's manager female reader x kuroo + oikawa
to sum it up: Y/N goes to a pretty big training camp, meeting up with her old friends, making some new ones, you know the drill. But what happens when two of her teasing 'friends' meet each other?
warnings: crack, crack, crack
----------------------------------------------------------
It was an early morning and Y/N was walking down the path to Karasuno, where she was supposed to meet her team and get to this summer's two-week training camp. The camp was held in Tokyo, as per usual, but it was much bigger than usual. The schools attending this camp were Johzenji, Shiratorizawa, Fukurodani, Karasuno, Nekoma, Date Tech and Aoba Johsai.
Y/N loved the training camps. It was a great place to learn and reunite with some old friends...and others.
"Oh the princess finally decided to show~"
"Tsukishima can you not?! I hate getting up when I don't wanna, so shut up!"
The blonde smirked at the iritated girl and got on the half-full bus. Y/N pouted a little but went on the bus as well.
"Morning Y/N!"
"Hi Suga."
"Are you tired? Do you want to sleep on my shoulder or something?"
"Suga you're to sweet oh my god. But I'll be fine, thanks."
The girl took a seat in the back besides Nishinoya and Ennoshita. Ennoshita just nicely said hello to her, while the libero was practically jumping out of his seat.
"Morning Noya."
"GOOD MORNING Y/N!"
The girl just laughed at that and Ennoshita sighed. At this point almost everyone was on the bus when the coach finally appeared.
"ALL RIGHT YOU TEENAGERS! WE'RE GOING AND YOU BETTER WIN SOME GAMES THERE OR I'LL KICK YOUR ASSES!"
~~~
The volleyball team arrived at the camp after a long ride and was now taking their stuff off the bus, when Y/N heard her name being called.
"Y/N!"
"BOKUTO!"
Bokuto ran up to her and hugged her so tight she thought she'll suffocate.
"Bo...can't...breathe..."
"Bokuto you're crushing her. Let her go."
"OH MY GOD I'M SORRY Y/N I DIDN'T MEAN TO HURT YOU I'M JUST HAPPY TO SEE YOU!"
"Yeah yeah. I'm happy to see you too. Hi Akaashi."
The setter just responded with a nod and reminded his captain that they had to get settled in their rooms.
"OKAY! I'LL SEE YOU LATER Y/N!"
"SEE YA!"
"I can't believe he's your best friend."
"Well at least I have a friend besides Yamaguchi. No offense Yams, you know I love you."
"None taken."
Tsukishima just tched and left the girl alone. Finally. A little peace.
"Look! It's the other manager! I don't think our last conversation was over hottie~"
Ew.
"What do you mean? I'm pretty sure it's over and I don't need to talk to you, ever."
"Terushima leave the girl alone. Stop being so horny."
"AM NOT!"
"Sure. Come on let them get settled in."
And they left, thankfully. Y/N sighed, they've been here for literally 5 minutes and she already has a headache.
"I can't do this. Are we the last ones that arrived or something?!"
"Looks like you are chibi-chan~"
No. Oh god no. Whyyyy? Fuck.
"WHAT DID HE JUST SAY?!"
"YOU WANNA FIGHT CITY BOY HUH?!"
"Calm down you two. Don't you know manners. You can't make scenes in other schools."
"Guys. Relax, it's fine."
sigh.
"Hello Kuroo."
"Hi chibi-chan~"
sigh.
"What do you want?"
"What? I can't just come and say hi to my favorite manager~"
"I can't. I can't do this right now. Just stop."
"Stop what chibi-chan~"
"THAT! STOP THAT!"
Nekoma's captain just smirked proudly and left in the direction of his team.
sigh.
"You're sighing a lot today."
"I know. Is it too late to go back?"
"There is no going back. You are stuck with us."
"Wow that's great. Thanks for making me feel better Daichi."
"Anytime. Now let's go."
~~~
Karasuno was all settled in and right now they were all on the way to the cafeteria to have lunch with others.
"Oh I'm so hungry..."
"Me too."
"You're always hungry. That's why you're fat."
"SHUT UP TSUKISHIMA. I. AM. NOT."
"Well well what's that huh? You can't just call a girl fat like that now can you? Especially not someone like the little cutie here~"
Ah. Oikawa. Lovely.
"Oikawa. Hi."
"Hi little cutie. How are you doing on this lovely da-OW!"
"Stop flirting Shittykawa and get to lunch. Everyone's hungry."
"Oh but Iwa-"
"Now."
"Hmph."
"Bye Oikawaa~"
Y/N smiled and playfully waved at the defeated setter who just looked at her with 'sad' eyes. She then continued her journey to the lunch room with her team ready for a good meal.
~~~
"Y/N!"
"Huh? Oh! Koganegawa! Hi!"
The Date Tech's setter greeted the girl and was beaming with excitement.
"DID YOU SEE THE GYMS?! THEY ARE SO COOL! AND HUGE! AND THERE'S A RUNNING TRACK! AND HORSES! AND A FRICKING POOL! THEY HAVE EVERYTHING! WANNA SEE?! I CAN SHOW YOU!"
"UM YES! LEAD THE WAY!"
~~~
Karasuno was now warming up in the gym waiting for their next practice match to start, when Shiratorizawa walked in.
"Ooh! Would you look at that? We're playing Karasuno! My favorite teamm! Ooh and there she is~"
sigh.
"Hi Tendou. Guys."
"Hello."
"Well it's soooo nice to see you again! Karasuno's manager~"
Satori said with the tilt of his head and a big smirk as usual.
"Nice to see you too. Can't wait to kick your ass~"
The girl winked at the guess monster and went back to filling up the water bottles. Interactions with Tendou were entertaining, to say the least.
"Pff! She won that one."
"Shut up Semi!"
"Heh."
~~~
It was now dinner time and practices were over for the day, so everyone was sitting outside, talking, eating and what not. Y/N was currently at the food table picking what to eat, when she was disturbed.
"Hey chibi-chan~"
"Hi little cutie~"
"..."
Y/N was looking back and forth between the two, and Kuroo and Oikawa were just holding eye contact when Oikawa decided to speak.
"Oh I see how it is...You have a lot of admirers little cutie~"
"I'm sorry. I don't think we've met. Kuroo Tetsurou, Nekoma's captain."
"Oikawa Tooru. The setter and captain of Seijoh."
"I take it you know chibi-chan huh?"
"Ah yes. Aoba Johsai had a few practice matches with Karasuno in the past few months."
"Mhm."
"Okay. This is weird. I couldn't handle you two alone and now all at once is just too much. So if you excuse me...I'm gonna go eat with my friends."
"But I thought we were friends little cutieee. Don't do me like that."
Oikawa said with a pout, while Kuroo just snorted.
"Like she'd ever be friends with you."
"Oh yeah? And you think she would be your friend Rooster? You're waaay out of her league."
"Oh? Is that so? We'll see about that..."
"Indeed we will..."
And the two captains parted with a new task on their minds. Make the other one jelaous.
~~~
It was early in the morning and Y/N was at the pool. She just wanted to go for a quick swim before the day that was ahead of her. But she wasn't alone.
"Morning chibi-chan~"
"Morning."
"Didn't think you'd be here."
"Well I just needed to relax a bit before the day fully starts and swimming does the job you know."
Kuroo hummed in understanding and took of his shirt, leaving him in his swimming trunks and hot as fuck abs, but we're not gonna talk about that now.
"Wanna race?"
"Oh? You wanna race chibi-chan? You sure?"
"Yeah. I mean why not?"
"All right then."
"To the edge and back?"
"Sure."
"Okay. Ready? Set. Go!"
And they both dived into the water. Y/N felt great. She loved swimming. It brought her some kind of new strength. When they reached the edge, she did the turn and fastened her pace, since she was saving her energy for the big finish. And she won.
"You're....a good...swimmer..."
"Thanks~"
"That was sneaky. You knew you were gonna win."
They were now standing close to each other both smirking and holding eye contact.
"I guess I just hang around you too much. See ya~"
The girl turned to leave, hoping to hide the big blush on her cheeks. Kuroo just smiled and chuckled. She really did amaze him sometimes. However, what they both didn't notice was a fuming brunette who had witnessed the whole scene from his bedroom window.
~~~
Y/N was currently listening to her best friend telling her a story outside on the warm sun.
"AND THEN I FELL! FACE FIRST!"
"Pffff"
"DON'T LAUGH Y/N IT'S NOT FUNNY! I WAS HURT!"
"I'm....s....sorry...Bo...okuto...but...it....is..."
Y/N was hysterically laughing and clutching her stomach with tears in her eyes.
"Oh come on don't get pouty on me Bo."
"No. You laughed at me and I am not talking to you."
And the ace stalked off away from the girl who laughed yet again.
"What's so funny little cutie~"
"Oh it's just Bokuto. I can't deal with him sometimes."
Oikawa now leaned down dangerously close to Y/N's face with a devilish smirk on his face. He quickly glanced somewhere behind her, but she was too busy looking at him to notice.
"Maybe you should deal with me instead."
Hearing his voice so low and husky made Y/N's cheeks turn red very quickly. She was at a loss of words.
"I...um.."
Satisfied with his little act, the setter smirked and turned away leaving a flustered manager and a jelaous middle blocker behind.
~~~
Stuff like this happened A LOT throughout the whole camp and Y/N got so flustered in these few days it was unimaginable. Whenever Kuroo would make her flustered Oikawa was always near to do the same. It was driving her insane.
Thankfully it was now the end of the training camp and Karasuno was loading their stuff on the bus while Y/N was saying her goodbyes to her friends. Hoping to avoid any sort of interaction with two certain captains.
"I'LL MISS YOU!!!"
"Stop crying Bokuto."
"BUT AKAASHI I'M SAD!"
"Hey hey now. You're gonna be fine Bokuto. We'll see each other again soon you know. I could even come to Tokyo sometime if you want."
"THAT'S PERFECT! HOW DID I NOT THINK OF THAT! YES Y/N PLEASE COME VISIT!"
"Does that mean you'll visit me too chibi-chan?"
There were already butterflies in Y/N's stomach just because of his voice. Unbelievable.
"Answer my question chibi-chan~"
"Well she isn't obligated to do anything for you bed-head."
"Oya? I think she can speak for herself perfectly fine Oikawa."
"OKAY! THAT'S IT! I CAN'T DEAL WITH YOU TWO ANYMORE!"
The two just looked at her confused by what she meant, when Sugawara called her on the bus.
"My bus is leaving. Byee~"
And she kissed them both on the cheek and left to meet with her team, with a few members in their 'protective dad modes'. Leaving two very stunned volleyball players looking in her direction...
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luvspence · 9 months ago
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neptune and back
spencer reid x reader
synopsis: you’re in love with spencer reid
word count: 485
—-
“STOP IT!”
“whyyyy??”
“i look so bad right now”
spencer shot another picture with the polaroid camera he had just found in your dresser
“impossible y/n”
you gave him the stink eye
“flattery will only get you so far”
“oh is that so?”
he got up and kissed your cheek
“what if i told you, that you were the most beautiful person ive ever seen, and remember i don’t forget faces”
he got up and started to pace around, sort of like how he walked while he taught a class
“what if i told you that every moment of every day you amaze me with your character, with your kindness, with your intellect”
you continued to stare at the man that paced the room with a tiny pink polaroid is his large hands
“what if i told you that you are the love of my life, and that no matter what you look like, that in every fleeting moment you are the most gorgeous girl in the world and that i would give nothing to be anywhere but with you right now”
you blushed like a strawberry, spencer tapped the side of the camera, squinted his eye and lined it up with the peep hole, pointed the camera at you
as much as you thought you looked like a mess spencer made you feel like the only girl in the world, so you flashed him a smile
the flash clicked and the picture sprang out the top, spencer was quick to take it and start to shake it to speed up the developing
he stopped shaking and looked at it
“when i thought you couldn’t get anymore perfect”
“you’re such a sap spencer reid”
he pulled out his wallet, tucked the picture of you into the clear flap
he pulled up in the chair next to you, you stood up to sit in his chair with him, resting your head on his shoulder, his hands wrapped around your waist and resting in your lap, as you interlocked fingers with his
“you’re gonna be grateful one day for these pictures”
“hm?”
“you know once we’re all old, and our hair has gone gray, and our kids will be off at some college, and we can’t walk up the stairs about talking about our knees, we’re gonna look back on these pictures with the utmost of fond memories”
“no spencer you’re gonna invent a way to reverse aging so that we’ll be young forever”
“oh right, how could i forget”
he buried his chin in your head, kissing your forehead lightly
“you’re the love of my life y/n, you’re it for me, i want it to be you and me, forever”
“that’s how it’s going to be, forever. i’m in love with you spencer reid, totally hopelessly in love”
he pulled you in tighter
“i love you to neptune and back y/n”
“to neptune and back”
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ladyfawkes · 6 months ago
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Desiderium by Trekkiehood and LadyFawkes Current word count: 11810 Current Chapter 6 AND 7: The Lost Courier; Her Majesty's Seal Rated: T for graphic descriptions of violence, wartime, torture, things of a POW nature. Whyyyy in the world am I top-posting someone else's AO3 link, you wonder? I HAVE GRADUATED TO FULL-ON CO-CAPTAIN STATUS OF THIS SHIP. And I couldn't be more thrilled!!! @Trekkiehood needs to do better things with life instead of languishing on a fic her heart needs to move on from. Stuff like earning a degree. I've been beta-ing with her on this story for over a year. Co-authoring makes perfect sense, no?? This is soooo whumpy, guys. We're into the hurt chapters now. Overall Story Summary: Desiderium: an ardent desire or longing; especially: a feeling of loss or grief for something lost.
Eugene and Rapunzel's lives are turned upside down when a war breaks out between Corona and Equis. As Captain of the Guard, Eugene is forced to leave his wife and daughter to fight on the front lines, where a tragic berserker attack leaves Rapunzel a widow.....or so she's been led to believe.
Now prisoner to a sadistic megalomaniac, our severely injured Eugene must fight harder than he's ever fought before in order to escape dire circumstances and drag his way back to his family.
With battles raging, the enemy advancing, too many fallen troops, dwindling supplies under siege, and especially absent their most trusted strategic leader, the only chance Rapunzel, Corona, and Eugene have is if the kingdom can still somehow pull off the seemingly insurmountable task of winning this forsaken war. Has dusk finally arrived for the kingdom of the sun, or will she rise victorious once more? Chapter 6 Summary: Lance calls for retreat as he never heard Eugene issue the order. Whomever is left of Corona's soldiers are forced to scatter. The Lieutenant receives a somber report.
Flames had spread virtually everywhere. Lance had originally expected Eugene to give the order, but the Lieutenant instead gave the order for everyone to fall back. It seemed as if Regis and his men had been clandestine about trailing accelerants all over the battlefield and multiple surrounding areas. Everything not already burned to cinders still reeked of kerosene. Lance couldn’t see much of anything through the smoke and burning debris. It seemed as though the whole world were burning. Fire crawled over every inch of dried grass and as it licked up the tent poles, cheap textiles catching fire even as the nauseating acrid stench of burning human flesh and hair seemed to permeate everything. Bizarrely, Lance’s first instinct was to find a humorous side to this moment, something he’d always been able to do in the past. Yet nothing humorous existed about this situation. Those surviving were thankfully following Lance's lead. He hoped their opposition was also retreating in the other direction, but he really couldn’t be sure. The swirling smoke was far too thick and he could only see a few feet in front of him and conditions were even worse behind him. He didn’t know where Eugene was, but their leader was most likely leading his own retreat. He wouldn’t be foolish enough to stay behind. The wily man still possessed at least some sense of self-preservation. Most of the time. Lance knew that Eugene wanted nothing more than to get back to Rapunzel. Nagging doubt regarding Eugene’s state of mind going into this conflict had now etched itself deep into his psyche, however.... Even though he well knew his friend wouldn’t willingly be stupid, Eugene had been half-crazed with exhaustion yesterday afternoon. And Lance well knew his captain was so fretful over the correctly-presumed upcoming ambush that he hadn’t slept a wink the night before…. An ancient hidden tunnel system lay beneath Old Corona. Varian had accidentally rediscovered a very few of its tunnels when he planned the ill-fated hot water system some years before. Much of it had caved in halfway centuries ago and although they could no longer use it to get back to the palace, they could secretly retreat and wait out the worst of the rampage. Lance couldn’t tell if any enemy troops still surrounded him. He didn’t see any opposing colors so he assumed he was clear. If not, it wasn’t likely anyone would make it back across the flaming field. The cave entrance which held the tunnels was hidden in the mountain, and only a trained eye would notice anything irregular in the rock. The troops were trained. Hopefully they would remember. Of course they would. In fact, Lance forcefully reminded himself, most of them were probably already waiting for me! Lance crept carefully into the cave, giving his eyes a few moments to adjust to the relative darkness, and followed the wall on the right side of the cave toward the bigger cavern and rendezvous point. He let out an audible sigh of relief after seeing many of the men who had been closest to him on the battlefield had already arrived in the cavern. But it was still less than half of those who had begun the charge with them just three hours prior. There was blood and the smell of charred skin, plus a whole slew of other injuries but they were here and alive. He made his way between the men, taking stock of who was there and who wasn’t, assisting with first aid as best he could. More men trickled into the tunnel as Lance did what he could to help the wounded. It didn’t take long for him to realize that Eugene was nowhere to be seen. That was Eugene, though, always making sure everyone else was okay first. It’s what made him the best kind of leader. He’d be here soon enough. He’d come in with the last group. He’d come in, suck it up, outwardly become the commander his soldiers so desperately needed, and then the dismal spirit blanketing the cave would miraculously lift. And people would stop whispering among themselves and staring fearfully at me, Lance fretted. Lance was many things but was certainly no combat leader.
He was a somewhat-above-average second-in-command follower. Eugene always made the tough decisions and Lance occasionally got to pretend they were his own. It was their system and it worked wonderfully and Eugene would come walking in any minute. Lance firmly believed that. They waited. And continued to wait. And waited even longer. Lance could feel everyone holding their collective breaths as the time wore on. It felt like half a day, when really it was just a few hours crawling by like molasses in January. A final few stragglers came in. And then….came the silence. No one else showed. But Lance refused to panic. There was no reason for that because Eugene would arrive. He simply had to. Lance wasn’t sure exactly how much time had passed when he finally heard footsteps coming from the front of the tunnel. No, not steps, he listened more intently, someone is running towards us. Lance automatically drew his sword and held it out in a defensive posture, and demanded to know who had entered the tunnel. The murmuring amongst the men in the cave behind him had abruptly fallen silent. Anticipation filled the cavern and Lance felt a bit of relief. It just had to be Eugene. He was back now. Everything would be fine. Someone did burst into the stone tunnel. But it wasn’t Eugene. It was a young courier boy with an ash-covered face -- ash-covered everything, really; his eyes were wide and he was urgently clutching something to his chest. Lance couldn’t rightly tell if the courier had natural dark hair or if the hair had been caked with too much soot and dirt, masking something different. Young dark eyes skimmed the room until they landed on the highest ranking officer in the tunnel. Lance. “Lieutenant!” There was relief in the young one’s eyes. Lance immediately thought of Timothy. The blond boy was nowhere to be found. Someone had mentioned that he was last seen riding Maximus towards the kingdom. Lance could only pray that was true. This other boy in the tunnel reached toward Lance, holding out his hands which were gripping tightly to a piece of fabric. Lance slowly came forward, tension rising with every step. “I-I found this, I d-don’t-” the boy stuttered, attempting to report. Lance removed the strip of fabric from the courier’s trembling hands. He could now tell it was a sash. Eugene’s new commodore’s sash, to be exact...or, more appropriately, what was left of it. Most of it had been burned away and what little was left behind had been smeared with soot or saturated with now-desiccated blood. So much blood. But it could easily be anyone’s blood. It didn’t have to be Eugene’s. Some enemy soldier could’ve fallen in his direction after being charged by Eugene, or perhaps Eugene had been leading one of his own wounded men to safety. “Where did you find this?” demanded Lance.“ I-I was coming back and got separated from my company. The fire was s-so intense and I couldn’t, I couldn’t see anything. But then I-I re-remembered training drills and s-started coming here b-but v-visibility was still so poor I-I tripped on a, on, on a b-body -- or...rather w-what was l-left of one. It was v-very ba-badly burnt. It was in....in the m-middle of a sea of charred re-remains. N-no w-way to id-identify...." the courier caught his breath, obviously trying to choke back a sob. Lance could scarcely imagine how terrifying that would've been; stumbling upon a field of incinerated fellow countrymen. Possibly even their own leader.... "But the s-sash was laying l-looped around an arm, or wh-what was left of-of an ar-arm. With the only piece of fabric left. I-it’s the Cap--erm--Commodore’s, isn’t it?” Lance didn’t answer for a moment, holding what was left of the once shiny new sash in his hands. About three weeks previously, after Corona had received word that King Edmund was on the way with 4,000 fresh Dark Kingdom troops, to relieve the scant 600 or so Corona had left, Eugene had been designated a new rank and by extension a new sash in preparation for the upcoming infusion of troops. It originally looked quite similar
to Eugene’s previous gold sash, only with two parallel sky blue stripes down the sides. King Edmund had warned that with his extra troops, the rank of captain was about to become too common and would displace Eugene’s rank designation as “Captain”. As such, it was too low of a designation for their upcoming combined command structure. Edmund was adamant that his son remain in high command and simply be given a boost in status. All of the men -- especially the ones who hadn’t yet fought for Commodore Fitzherbert -- needed a visual and audio cue distinct from anyone else. And now….Lance delicately held what the boy had given him...little more than a 12-inch length strip of singed blue-and-gold, most of it saturated in deep crimson with crusted blood. A new rank and sash….for the troops that never came.... “Yes, but that doesn’t have to mean anything bad,” Lance shook himself, briefly thanking the young courier for his report before concealing the ruined sash behind his back and turning toward the rest of the men in the cavern. “I’m sure he’s fine. We just need to… go and find him!” He said with far more confidence than he felt. “In the morning, once we’re more certain of a head count and we’ve had a little sleep, we’ll go out in small groups and search for the rest of our men.” It was simply too dangerous, the landscape outside the cave too flame-ridden, soot-coated, and everyone too injured, too traumatized, too in shock, and too exhausted to even consider organizing search parties to find the rest of their remaining members, living or dead. No one said anything. Lance was almost glad. --------------------------------------------- Chapter 7: Her Majesty's Seal Summary: Timothy and Maximus barely make it back to Corona alive. How will everyone react to the news they bring from the battlefront? Notes: SURPRISE!!!! A TWO-FER!!! I couldn't resist posting a second chapter. It's just too good/emotional.
“No, no, Catalina seems more like a chocolate-loving person doesn’t she?” Ash shrugged, “I don’t know, she just seems like a strawberry lover.” “Yes, but chocolate is… chocolate!” Ashira let out a small laugh, “Quite an argument you have there, Varian. Perhaps you should forget about being an inventor and go into law. I’m sure that any court would love to have your witty and convincing skills.” “You know Ash, sometimes I’m not even sure why we’re even friends.” Varian pouted. “No, seriously!” Ash insisted. “I’m sure Rapunzel could find a place for you on her new court. I think it’d go over wonderfully!” “Come on, Ash! All I’m saying is that Catalina seems like a chocolate kind of girl.” Varian watched as Ashira opened her mouth, only to be interrupted by the scullery door swinging open all the way opposite the large room. The young engineer's initial reaction was surprise, quickly followed by a rush of happiness at seeing his friend. Timothy had arrived back home. Varian automatically moved towards the young courier, arms outstretched in welcome. “Timothy? Timothy! Hey! I’m glad you’re back, I’ve missed ya, bud.” Then Varian saw him walk closer, and Varian caught sight of his face and stopped. “Timothy, what on earth is wrong?” Timothy was wide-eyed, out of breath, and shaking; part of his face and hair and clothing had been caked in ash, soot, and what certainly looked to be blood. Taking initiative, Ashira had approached Timothy with a large ladle of fresh water. “I-I have to see the Queen!” Timothy clutched a small scroll so tightly against his chest. Out of breath though he was, Timothy was more adamant and utterly frightened than Varian could recall ever having seen him before. He very nearly didn’t take the offered water from Ashira….until he reluctantly took a few sips worth...but that was all, despite how clearly parched he must have been. “Timothy, what happened? What’s wrong?” Varian asked worriedly. Timothy’s behavior triggered memories that filled Varian’s head unbidden, horrible memories from some years ago, of him having discovered his father encased in the amber rock. “I-I’m sorry, I can’t talk to you!!” shouted Timothy. He was only a hair’s breadth away from full blown panic. “I must get urgent news to the Queen. NOW!! It’s my, it’s my d-duty!!” He sounded more like he was repeating an oath rather than actually speaking his mind. Varian’s heart went out to him and he became almost desperate to assist. The engineer was briefly diverted into another memory of himself, approaching Rapunzel with awful news, hoping she could help…. Varian shook himself. Timothy’s near-panic and shouting….the fixed and dilated pupils….something had to be horribly, terribly wrong. Like a cornered fawn, Timothy jerked away from them both, heading toward the inside scullery exit, and sprinting madly through the foyer corridor. The courier flashed a special Queen’s seal emblem toward the guards standing on either side of the throne room. Without even asking him to halt, they instead immediately opened the wide double-doors to the throne room, allowing him to sprint through the threshold unimpeded, only to immediately shut them behind him. Protocol of the Queen’s seal required it. While Varian was instantly grateful the guards hadn’t accosted Timothy the way they had done with himself, the engineer couldn’t quell the chill across his heart…. “What on earth was that all about?” Varian whispered, feeling that glacier of dread swelling inside him. Ash looked concerned, but offered a half-hearted half-smirk, “Well, there is one way to find out.” She grabbed Varian’s hand, pulling him towards the hallway leading to the side door of the throne room. She cracked the door open and waited. Varian wished the sickening feeling would go away. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~TTS~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Rapunzel listened as Nigel droned on endlessly. They needed more weapons. They needed more men. They needed this. They needed that. It was always something. Well, Rapunzel needed the war to be over. STAT. She wasn’t really listening.
She couldn’t even if she had wanted to due to something feeling so very….off. Something screamed wrongness and she couldn’t quite put her finger on what it was. Every report she had been given that day so far, from the battlefield and otherwise, had been positive, though. No major battles. No major casualties. Despite one of the reports being slightly delayed, everything seemed comparably fine. It simply had to be those horrifying nightmares, she decided. Every night, most of the nightmares would start out identically, only to have a varied ending. Within every nightmare, Eugene died in a slightly different yet no less cruel way. Every single time, it had something to do with that blasted tunnel. However, Rapunzel couldn’t ever truly see what had killed him nor how it was connected to the new tunnel. All she could glean was that each and every time, her beloved was ill, in extreme pain, bleeding out, and that the tunnel had something to do with it. Anytime within her nightmares she had attempted to get closer to Eugene to see why he was ill or hurting or wounded, something would invariably stop her. Surely, these nightmares had to be due to the stress...or so she told herself. However, that ominous feeling had been undeniably growing. Today, it blared in her mind and drove her to distraction far worse than ever before. And it was not going away this time. Though the queen told herself to ignore it as best as she could, she was certain something was very wrong. Rapunzel stood up and started pacing as Nigel carried on with trade and supply acquisitions. The queen felt almost like a caged animal, marching back and forth across the tile, desperate for something to happen. Nigel was mid-sentence when the throne room door abruptly swung open unannounced. The queen’s head jerked upward, startled to see Timothy marching unbidden through the doors as the guards closed them immediately behind the young courier. Something was clearly extremely wrong. The feeling of overwhelming anxiety threatened to take over. “What are you doing in here!??” Nigel screeched. “Your Highness, please,” Timothy spoke haltingly to Rapunzel, trying to block out Nigel, “I-I have something of utmost importance to report,” Timothy said breathlessly, falling to one knee in reverence in front of her. Rapunzel felt a growing tightness in her chest. To her knowledge, no Coronian Courier had used her seal to gain instant entry to the throne room before now. So, this was it then. This had to be the culmination of all those nightmares. She knew it. And yet somehow wished she didn’t. “Go ahead, Timothy.” The boy was shaking, hyperventilating, and extremely pale; caked blood was splattered across his skin, hair, and one of his trouser legs was soaked in blood as well. His young face was streaked with tears and ashes. He had clearly been through quite an ordeal. “Are you all right?” “Corona’s soldiers were ambushed this morning. They were ordered to battle before they even finished breakfast,” Timothy said so quickly that Rapunzel nearly couldn’t follow what he’d said. The queen paused, considering this news. An ambush generally means a raid, Rapunzel knew, and that typically means prisoners. “Go on,” Rapunzel urged Timothy, despite the heaviness in her heart. “Eug-” he cut himself off, and Rapunzel felt her heart stop, “The, the Captain, he’s” Timothy gulped hard-- “--he’s dead.” “No,” came out in tiny a whisper. She wasn’t even entirely sure that she said it out loud. Nigel barked with displeasure, “What do you mean by ‘dead!?’” As Timothy tried standing again, he swayed slightly, but Rapunzel could hardly process what was going on. Eugene was….dead? Surely, Timothy was unintentionally mistaken somehow... “H-he knew Corona was f-fighting a losing b-battle,” Timothy sniffled, “and h-he sent me and Max back to tell you bu-but just as we were leaving Old Corona Valley, Max turned back briefly and w-we saw my captain g-get r-run through--” and at this, Timothy’s bravado for the queen had been spent and his face crumpled. Sobs tore through his
small frame as he pressed the heels of his hands up against his eye sockets. “Well, then why didn’t you help him?!” Nigel had begun pacing and flailing his arms, making stupid demands, per usual, and having ridiculous expectations. “I-I couldn’t!,” protested Timothy, tears falling freely. By now, he looked as if he were 13 years old. “We were -- by that point, we were over a mile away! But Max had to keep going. I even begged him to turn back, so we could go back and assist my captain,” Timothy paused, “but once he did, even Max received an arrow to his shoulder muscle. Equisian soldiers who lay to ambush us on the mountain pass knew we were trying to leave, just like….like the Captain knew they would.....specifically to prevent me from sending word back here!! B-but, but M-Max just huffed, bore down, and ran himself ragged while riding back toward the palace!” Timothy drew in a deep breath that was choked off by another sob. “Corona’s Prince Consort is now dead and you did nothing!” Nigel berated. Timothy’s mouth fell open as he continued defending himself, trying to inform his Queen, and keep his composure simultaneously. “You know nothing, you weren’t even there!!” Tim grew a bit more brave each time he defended himself. “Max was angry at first when the Captain told him to carry me back to Corona -- even stamped around and protested leaving the battlefield, but….the Captain all but threatened him, actually did something I’ve never seen him do -- he actually pulled rank and commanded Max to go, telling him he’d best take me back to the Queen with his very important message!” “The Prince is dead and you did nothing,” Nigel huffed, snatching the small scroll Timothy held in his trembling hands. Per usual the royal advisor was utterly tone-deaf, once again, to what was truly happening. “I-I’m sorry! I was only--was only following his own orders!” “Well-!” “Nigel,” Rapunzel spoke firmly, with no room for argument, “just look at him!!” she told the cantankerous old advisor. “Timothy did everything he could. His job is to deliver messages, not to fight in battle on the front lines. Couriers are forbidden from carrying war weapons, as you well know. And Tim barely made it back here in one piece, as it is!!” She turned to the shivering soot-coated boy in front of her. “Thank you, for your bravery and invaluable services, Courier Timothy. I’ll go to debrief Maximus in a moment. Can I deduce from the fact that you both made it back here that Max, although wounded, will make a full recovery?” At this, Timothy nodded gratefully. “He’s steaming mad to be laid up, but yes, Your Majesty, he will recover.” Rapunzel walked over to Nigel and reclaimed the small scroll he had snatched out of Timothy’s quaking hands earlier. “I believe this is meant for me,” said Queen Rapunzel icily. Then she again turned to Timothy. “Go get some rest and refreshment, Timothy. And see to it that you get a replacement uniform. I doubt Max’s blood stains will come out of that fabric. I’ll speak with you again soon enough.” Her voice didn’t waver even once. She spoke with a calmness and detachment that was unfamiliar to her. Rapunzel’s brain seemed to have frozen. Eugene just couldn’t be dead. Timothy just had to be mistaken, that’s all. She rose to her feet, “Nigel, please tend to Timothy, I need to speak to Maximus.” Nonetheless, the likelihood that Eugene was dead was rapidly gaining strength.
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nightshade-minho · a year ago
Text
-Nightmare- (9)
Warnings: just some making out. Oh, and some angst.
Wc: 4k+
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You stayed cooped up in your room for that entire day and the next afternoon, only coming out to heat up some frozen pizza in the microwave. You gave Minho nothing more than glances and tight nods. He tried to ignore the aching in his heart.
Sleep came fitfully that night. However in the morning, he felt himself being shaken awake, groaning as he grumbled. It was too early for this.
A few minutes earlier, you’d woken up to the sound of your phone incessantly ringing. You groaned, answering the call. “Helloo~, is this Minho? My name’s Sihyeon and I was wondering- ”
You sighed at the unfamiliar high voice, getting out of bed and going to Minho’s room, climbing onto his bed to shove him awake, phone still in hand.
He whined, shoving your hand away. 
“Minho, wake up!”
“Whyyyy?” He asked, still half asleep, frowning as he refused to open his tightly shut eyes.
You crawled closer, kneeling on the bed as you poked his side. “Come onn, you have a ca-” You yelped when he grabbed your hips, flipping you over to his other side and pulling you close. He smushed your face against his chest, not letting you wriggle out of his grasp. 
You stopped struggling after a few seconds. “I hate you.” You mumbled, as his soft snores slowly resumed.
You knew you were supposed to be getting over him, but it was so hard. He was so soft and warm...no. You told yourself again that he didn’t deserve your love. However, it was easier said than done, especially when you shifted a little, causing him to open his eyes slowly, gazing down at you. God, he has pretty eyes. When he noticed the position you were in, he quickly peeled himself away, sitting up with wide eyes.
“S-sorry...” He stuttered, averting his eyes.
You sighed, the loss of his warmth mimicking the coldness you felt in your heart. “It’s fine.” You sat up, stretching a little bit and yawning as you grabbed your phone. “Someone called asking for you. Her name was Sihyeon, I think.”
“Oh. I had sex with her like two weeks ago. She’s been bothering me ever since.”
You exhaled. “You’re an asshole, you know that?”
“Come on, Y/n, everyone in school knows I only do one-night stands. And she wasn’t good enough to be a fuckbuddy.” He says honestly. “She should know my reputation by now. And hasn’t she heard I have a girlfriend?”
You groaned, rubbing your temple. “Speaking of which...when are we going to tell everyone that we broke up?”
He looked up at you, a flash of hurt in his eyes.
“Oh. I kind of forgot about that. Maybe a week from now?”
“Or...we could just break up right after the dinner. I don’t feel comfortable staging a scene in public...and I don’t want this to go on for any longer than it has to.”
“What?”
“Well, if it happened in front of Rina, I think she’d be less suspicious. We could like, stage a fight. Knowing Rina, the news would be all over campus in a second.”
He frowned, “I...guess.”
You gave him a tight smile, getting up to leave. He watched you, his hands twitching to grab your wrist, pull you back and tell you what he felt. But he couldn’t. He returned the awkward smile, a lump in his throat as you turned at the door. 
“I’ll get ready at 7:00.”
You closed the door.
***
That evening, you sat in your room, looking in the mirror. Today, it would all be over. However, you knew the two of you could never go back to the way you used to be. Too many lines had been blurred.
You’d given up, more or less. This love was pointless. At this point, you didn’t even care about getting together with Minho. You no longer wanted him to fall for you the same way you did. All you wanted was your old friendship back. You missed the purity and love that used to be so abundant in your friendship.
You fixed the dress. It was black, sleeveless and had a skater skirt. Plain, except for some embroidered detail around the neckline. 
You worried for a moment that you might be underdressed, but then reminded yourself that you didn’t have a reason to care. You brushed your hair and sat at your vanity, deciding to apply just a little bit of makeup. At least you could say you put in a little bit of effort. However, as you reached for your makeup pouch, your eyes landed on the polaroids you’d stuck on the mirror. 
In one, 8 year old Minho was laughing with an ice cream cone in his hand, pointing a finger and laughing at your crying form, the scoop of ice cream previously on your cone now languishing on the floor. The camera had missed how he’d given you his cone soon after. 
The other one had been taken by your mom, right before prom. Minho had been asked out by the popular girl who’d eventually ended up as the prom queen, however he’d said No. He’d known you were dateless. You chuckled at your braces-clad smile. Minho looked confident and smart in his suit, as always.
Along with the polaroids, there was a framed photo, taken after your 13th birthday party. It was your favorite photo out of them all, and also the one that hurt the most at the moment. In it, you were smiling, holding a peace sign up to the camera. Around your neck was a thin rose gold chain, a tiny treble clef hanging from it. Minho’s gift. Usually, you two didn’t really give each other gifts, choosing to make or draw something instead. It allowed more room for personalization and was more effort-inducing.
However, Minho had told you that 13 was your lucky number, and hence he had to put in a little effort into the gift for that particular birthday. He’d been saving up the money to buy it for 2 years. Minho was sat next to you, fondness evident in his eyes as he gazed at your grinning face. 
God, it fucking hurt. You slowly peeled off all the polaroids, putting them all into the box along with your hairties, shutting it. You put the frame inside a drawer, exhaling.
You hadn’t worn that necklace for a while. You stopped wearing it around the time the two of you started college. Around the time you realized you loved him.
 It was too painful to see a reminder of Minho every time you looked in the mirror. You told him you’d lost it. His expression had been indifferent when you told him. You’d even offered to repay him the cost, but he’d refused.
You bent down, pulling open the bottom drawer and lifting a box. Setting it in front of you, you sifted through the random items placed in it, pulling out the jewelry box at the bottom. Opening it, you felt your heart clench at the sight of its familiarity, and all the memories it dredged up. You lifted it out carefully, teary eyes trying to focus on your reflection as you fastened it around your neck, hands shaking a little.
You stared at your neck, touching it gently. You missed the feeling of the delicate metal against your skin.
***
When you walked out of your room, Minho felt his heart beat faster. Yeah...he’d thought you looked hot in your party outfit. But this? This was more you. The simple, clean lines of your dress...the way your hair was bouncy and natural...
Wait.
His eyes zeroed in on the necklace. His necklace.
He didn’t know what to make of it. His heart was pounding so fucking fast. 
“I...thought you lost that.” He could feel a lump in his throat at the sight. 
Your parents had gifted you your first guitar when you were eleven. The first time Minho heard you play, he’d known music was your true calling. And his was dance. It was almost like it was meant to be. 
He’d been walking by a jewelry shop when he’d seen the necklace in the display window. It had reminded him of you almost immediately. He’d gone in, his heart dropping when he realized just how expensive it was. However, he didn’t wanna give up just yet.
So he started doing errands around the neighborhood. Walking the neighbors’ dogs, mowing lawns, etc. Small odd jobs that didn’t pay very well...but in two years, he’d somehow managed to earn enough money to buy it, just in time for your 13th birthday. 
Words couldn’t express how happy he’d felt when you wore it every day for the next fourteen years. Then one day, you told him you lost it. What hurt wasn’t the fact that you lost it, it was your expression when you said it. As if it wasn’t really a big deal.
You followed his line of sight, touching your necklace. “Oh, this? I was looking through some of my old boxes and I found it.” You said with a soft smile, hoping he wouldn’t notice your red eyes.
“Oh.” He paused, looking like he was thinking, his heart doing somersaults.
Coming a little closer, he backed you up against the door a bit. Confused, you looked up at him questioningly, your heart thudding due to his propinquity. His fingers traced your neck, causing you to shudder as he lifted the studded clef hanging from it, his eyes holding an expression you couldn’t quite discern.
“Don’t lose it again.” He said sternly, eyes drilling into yours. 
You nodded, staring up at him with your lips slightly parted. 
Fuck, there it was again. That innocent expression that made him go crazy, made him want to ruin you. Before he could even realize what was happening, he was leaning in.
“M-minho?”
He opened his eyes, his expression disconcerted as he pulled away quickly, coughing. “Sorry.” He mumbled, cheeks burning. 
You shook your head, “N-no, it’s okay.” You tried to calm your heart, peeling yourself off the door and fixing your dress. He nodded expressionlessly, heading to the sofa and sitting on it.
“So. Do you have a plan? What are we gonna do?”
You hummed, walking a little closer and sitting on the sofa, keeping some distance between the two of you. 
“Well...I didn’t really think much about it. Hmm...however we do this, I think we should portray you as the good guy. I should be the unreasonable one. The whole point of this was to clear your reputation, right?”
Minho nodded. “I guess...so what are you planning to do?”
“I guess I’ll just pretend to be irritable and annoyed at you the whole time. Maybe I’ll make a big deal about you flirting with Rina or something. Just be polite, be yourself. I’ll handle everything else.” You sighed.
There’s silence for a few minutes, before Minho scoots a little closer. You turned to face him, breath hitching at the proximity.
He placed his hand on top of yours on the sofa, wrapping his fingers around it and placing it on his lap.
“I’m sorry.” He stared into your eyes. “For everything. For disregarding our friendship, for forcing you to fake-date me, for being an asshole, and taking advantage of your goodness. I’m sorry about...what happened after the party. I don’t expect you to forgive me right away. Just...stay, please. Please. I can’t lose you. I can’t.”
You saw the sincerity in his eyes, swallowing the nausea as you inhaled. “Why?”
“What?”
“Why don’t you wanna lose me?”
He cocked his head to the side. He hadn’t expected you to ask that question. He thought about it for a minute, his other hand resting on top of your already intertwined ones. 
“Hmm. You should already know by now, but okay.” He inhaled. “You mean a lot to me. I literally grew up with you. You’re all I know...you’re my girl, okay?” 
You stared at him, opening your mouth and closing it. He scratched his neck. Fuck. He had more to say, but your dumbfounded expression was making him rethink that. 
“Uh...I m-mean...you know. You’re my best friend. I value our friendship a lot, so please...I don’t wanna be the one who fucks this up. I’ll regret it for the rest of my life if I do. Please, give me another chance.”
“Oh.” You tried to mask the disappointment in your voice. Your heart felt stuffed, but your brain was telling you that this was a good thing. He apologized, and promised to change. Wasn’t that enough for you? Minho wasn’t obligated to be in love with you.
You put a smile on your face. “Okay. I’m sorry, too. I played a part in all of this, as well. We’ll...we’ll make this work, Minho.”
He grinned, letting go of your hand to get up, glancing at his watch. “We should go.”
He looked back at you, holding his hand out. “Best friends?” He asked hopefully.
“Best friends.”
***
Minho had one hand on the steering wheel, glancing at you from time to time with a stupid grin on his face. You weren’t mad at him anymore, and that was a start. 
You looked so pretty. He liked how you looked both sexy and cute at the same time, the skirt of your dress flowy, yet the spaghetti straps showing off your smooth shoulders...and the best part about it was the necklace around your neck. Somehow, he felt like it marked you as his better than the hickeys did. The marks on your neck had faded a bit, but were still slightly visible...something he was very happy about.
“Um, Minho...eyes on the road, please.”
He chuckled, focusing his gaze back to the road as you pulled your skirt down a little. “It’s down this road, right?”
“Yeah, I think so.”
“Okay.” He stopped the car, unfastening his seatbelt and stepping out, walking around to open the door for you. 
“Hmm. The place looks nice.” 
You shrugged, “Yeah, I guess.”
“Listen, Y/n...you don’t have to do this. We’ll come up with something else, I mean...I don’t want you to come out of this looking like the bad guy.”
“Minho, we can’t come up with anything. We’re already here. Just...let me do this.” You sighed, looking up at the number plate on the door. “Mm. This is the one.” You rang the doorbell.
He nodded, a little nervous. He decided to button up one of the three buttons he’d left undone.  You looked at him, pouting. “Why’d you do that? You looked better with it undone.”
He blushed, opening his mouth to respond when the door was opened.
“You guys! Right on time!” Rina gushed. She had on a tight fitting red dress, matching red lipstick and pearls on her ears, as well as around her neck. Her hair was in an immaculate bun. Was she overdressed or were you underdressed? 
You turned your eyes away from Minho, opting to smile politely at her. “Thanks for inviting us.”
You glanced at Minho. If you hadn’t known Minho well, you would have thought his smirk was genuine. However, you could see the layer of nervousness behind it.
“Come in, you two. I’ll get the plates ready.”
She beckoned you in. The apartment looked the same as the last time you’d been there, only cleaner.
As you followed Rina in, you saw the backs of a guy and a girl sitting on the couch, chatting to Juyeon who was standing next to them. Rina followed your line of sight. “Oh...sorry, I invited one more couple to join. I hope you don’t mind.” She glanced at Minho. “You know them, right? I mean, I know you know Mera well. And Hyunjin’s your friend.”
Oh.
Minho nodded. “Yeah.”
You breathed in. You didn’t want to put up an act in front of two more people...you’d already been nervous, but now you were more so.
“Ah, Y/n! You look nice.” Juyeon said, winking at you and causing Minho to shoot him a glare. Did this guy have an ounce of shame?
Mera and Hyunjin both gave you awkward smiles which you returned, thanking Juyeon as Rina gestured to the couch.
“Wait here, okay? I’ll go get the table ready. Y’all can talk while I’m gone.” She smiled, before leaving and going into the kitchen.
There was an awkward silence in the room as she left.
You glanced at Mera , who was wearing a shimmery blue-green dress that made her look stunning. She cleared her throat. “Um, hi guys. How are you?”
“We’re doing alright.” Minho spoke monotonously. He looked at Hyunjin, pointing between the two with a clenched jaw. “When did this happen?”
Hyunjin paused for a moment. “Hmm...at the party.”
“Um, I didn’t see you-”
“I came upstairs after you two left.” He chuckled. “Speaking of which, good night, I assume?”
Minho looked at you, surprised to see you shrug, smiling. “It was pretty good.” You grinned.
Mera’s eyes narrowed as she saw Minho swallow, leaning back against the sofa.
You sat up a little, wondering how you should segue into an argument. You were second-guessing it now. You weren’t feeling the same eagerness you felt earlier in the morning to fake-break up with Minho, especially when the two of you had more or less made up. 
Mera gave you a small smile. “Just good? I couldn’t walk for weeks whenever Minho and I had sex.” She giggled, missing the awkward atmosphere in the air as she uttered the words.
Minho glanced at you. The annoyance in his expression was subtle. You rolled your eyes, turning back to Mera and giving her a fake smile.
Juyeon coughed, straightening up a bit. “TMI, Mera.” He chuckled, giving you another wink, which Minho thankfully missed as his gaze was directed to you. He picked up on the fact that you were uncomfortable. He moved closer, putting his hand on your thigh and squeezing reassuringly as Hyunjin asked Juyeon something, the three talking among each other. 
Minho took the chance to turn to you. “Look, we had no idea she’d invite more people. You don’t have to do anything. We don’t have to be in a rush. Just let me handle it.” He whispered, making you feel a lot lighter. You relaxed, your stiffness melting, along with your heart as Minho smiled at you. 
Rina came back into the room, honey-sweet smile present on her face like always. “It’s ready! Come on, guys.”
***
A few hours had passed. The dinner wasn’t as bad as you’d expected it to be. In fact, it was suspiciously good...everything from the food to the people. Surprisingly, you found conversation to be alright. You really liked Hyunjin. He was a nice guy, maybe a little overdramatic... (especially when he’d taken a bite of pasta that had been too hot) but overall, you could tell that he had a good heart. 
Mera, despite flirting a little too brazenly with Minho from time to time, wasn’t  bothering you much. Besides, Juyeon’s flirting was somehow even more brazen, his winks and smirks all directed to you. The weirdest part was that somehow Rina looked completely oblivious to it all.
When you finally finished eating, you were feeling pretty full. The food had definitely been ordered from out...there was no way Rina was capable of that level of cooking.
Hyunjin sighed. “That was really good, Rina.” He said, prompting some nods and appreciative moans. 
“Thank you.” She giggled.
Mera set her fork down. “I really have to be going, I’ve got an appointment early tomorrow morning. Rina, you coming?”
“Nah, I’m staying with Juyeon today.”
“Okay. Dinner was amazing. We should really do it again.” She leaned down to press a kiss to Hyunjin’s cheek. “Bye, Juyeon, Minho.” She made eye contact with you, smiling warmly. “Y/n.”
Once she left, it was just the five of you. Minho looked at him, a questioning look on his face, asking you if you wanted to leave.
You were about to nod when Juyeon interrupted the silence. “Minho, we haven’t been seeing you at the studio these days.”
“I’ve been busy...not really in a mood for dance.” He said, running a hand through his hair.
“You? Not in a mood for dance?” Hyunjin asked, laughing. “That’s not something you hear often.”
“Y/n, what have you been doing to him?” Rina sneered, chuckling. You were about to speak when Minho spoke up. “She didn’t do anything. What part of ‘not in the mood’ do you not understand?” He snapped.
There was silence as Rina glared at him, clenching her jaw. “Woah man, calm down. We were just joking around.” Juyeon said, sitting up.
“I’m sure you were.” Minho rolled his eyes, getting out of his chair. “Where’s the bathroom? I’m going to wash up.”
He left the room. You glanced at Rina. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay. Whatever.” Rina said, rolling her eyes and gathering up the plates, leaving for the kitchen with a scowl on her face.
Hyunjin cleared his throat. “Well...it was a really nice dinner.” He said awkwardly. He turned to Juyeon. “See you tomorrow, man.” He looked towards you, smiling genially. “It was nice getting to know you better, Y/n. I’m surprised Minho didn’t introduce us to each other earlier.”
You nodded, grinning at him. “Me too. Anyway, I look forward to spending more time with you.” Hyunjin winked at you. His wink wasn’t flirty like Juyeon’s but a rather friendly one.
After Hyunjin left, you decided to move to the living room, sitting on the sofa and waiting for Minho to be done so you could leave already. Juyeon was watching you, coming over and sitting opposite you on the sofa. His gaze was heavy, and you were being careful to avoid it. Juyeon was attractive, sure...but you didn’t like the way he kept constantly flirting. Wasn’t he and Rina supposed to be a thing? 
“Hmm...must be nice dating the biggest fuckboy on campus.” Juyeon laughed.
You looked at him. “Um...”
He moved uncomfortably closer, placing his hand on your thigh. “You know, you deserve a lot better.”
You shook your head, trying to get up and move away, but he grabbed your wrist, pulling you back down. His expression was angry. “Come on, Y/n...why are you rejecting me?” He asked with a puzzled expression...as if he was genuinely confused. 
You glowered at him, trying not to snap. “Because I have a fucking boyfriend?” You said, your tone icy.
Jesus, why was Minho taking so long?
His eyes widened, before he breaks into a laugh, slapping his knee as he threw his head back. You watched, brows furrowed. “Why are you laughing?”
He wiped a tear away, shoulders still shaking a lot. “I know you’re innocent...but I didn’t think you were quite this gullible.”
“What?”
He shrugged, letting go of your wrist. “Why don’t you go find your boyfriend.” He said, his voice calm.
You frowned, lifting yourself off the sofa as you made your way to the bathroom, Juyeon watching from the sofa with an amused expression.
You knocked a few times, with no answer. Pushing the door open, you found no one inside.
And that’s when you heard the moan.
Your heart beating and brain filled with white noise, you walked in the direction of the sound, your suspicions being confirmed when you saw the bedroom door ajar.
The scene inside made you feel nauseous. A terrible sense of deja vu enveloped you as you watched Rina running her hands over his chest as she sat on his lap...his shirt completely unbuttoned, the two of them making out furiously as he gripped her waist.
You hated the way your body was shaking as you watched, the two still oblivious to your presence. Your heart felt like it was crumbling.  You couldn’t help the sob that broke out of you at the sight, making them finally separate, Minho’s eyes turning to you and widening as they saw your crying face.
“Fuck you.” You managed to croak out, wrenching the necklace off your neck, throwing it at his feet and walking away, past Juyeon, avoiding eye contact. You didn’t wanna look back, didn’t wanna see his smug expression. All you were focused on was leaving that place as fast as you could.
As you half-walked, half-ran out into the night air, you swore as you realized it was raining. You could feel your makeup running down your face, the raindrops mixing with your tears.
Why did you feel so broken inside? Minho wasn’t your actual boyfriend, so it wasn’t like he’d actually cheated on you. Maybe...because somewhere deep inside, you’d stupidly thought that he actually did have feelings for you. Your conversation back home had sparked the tiniest bit of hope in you. God, you were so fucking stupid.
It was all hopeless. Fucking hopeless. You had to learn to accept that, sooner or later.
Somehow, you would.
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cannotescape · 7 months ago
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I took one for the team and watched the wilds dubbed in French, because I love pain
My thoughts:
- the translation is not bad, a few mistranslations but pretty decent overall
- I cringed every time the girls used “teenager language”. It just doesn’t sound right in French and I don’t know whyyyy. hearing Toni says “j’ai soif de la mort” was so wrong. never again please. “j’ai soif sa mère” à la rigueur ça passerait mieux... also Nora’s “j’ai plié le game” hmmmm nope
- they tried to match the level of cursing they have in English, and I appreciate that but it sounds weird. although it gets better halfway through, or maybe I just got used to it.
- I don’t want to drag the voice acting. It’s more about the voice choices than the acting in itself. But Leah sounds like a 35 years old (she also voices Supergirl apparently??). Toni is... hmmm... :/ Fatin and Shelby are good though! Fatin in particular. Also, Dot’s french VA is also Glimmer’s in She-ra which is hilarious.
Interesting translation choices:
- Nora’s Santa joke: “Parce qu’il s’envoie en l’air une fois par an et c’est toujours dans ta cheminée.” bien trouvé
- It’ll save your life, Toni, you’re taking the damn pill. ==> “JE vais te sauver la vie, que tu le veuilles ou non, tu vas avaler ce putain de cachet” interesting choice *eye emoji*
- “shark week for Rachel” ==> “bain de sang pour Rachel”. this was pretty clever and managed to keep the foreshadowing while not sounding suspicious because Rachel was literally in the water
- “Maybe don’t talk to me about hard.” / “Arrête de te la jouer Cendrillon” we’re losing the whole meaning of “maybe I’m not the best person to talk to about this considering my shitty life” but it was funny
- “You actually do [hate me] though” ==> “Non, tu nous as en horreur”. Like, it sounds weird but switching from “me” to “us” brings a new layer of meaning to how Toni sees herself as being part of a community. I think it’s partially because translating “I don’t hate you” in French is not easy. “Je ne te déteste pas” is probably the closest but literally no one says this. Translating literally “Je ne te hais pas/point” is not an option if you don’t want to sound like Chimène in Le Cid (but since Shelby likes theater...). Also it’s the most famous understatement of French literature and and the best way to say “je t’aime” without saying “je t’aime”. They settled on “Je n’ai aucune haine en moi” and it’s good, but leaves out the fact that it’s really fucking personal for the both of them. And Toni has to respond in a general way.
Worst translations:
- Shelby’s “guess I’m playing matchmaker” translated by “je vais jouer les marieuses” en saisissant Toni... okkk. “entremetteuse” would have worked just fine but...
- Toni’s “I do bug you” translated by “T’as envie de me tuer”... y a une différence de degré quand même lol, même si ok, ça fait un bon parallèle avec la suite et Shelby qui lui sauve la vie
- Leah’s “I sat in my fucking love puddle” became “Je suis restée assise, souillée par mon putain d’amour qui me dégoulinait entre les cuisses” ... no comment.
- Toni’s “The fuck are you wearing” became “C’est quoi cette tenue ?” and... :/ I’ve heard this exact sentence from my mom so many times that I can’t take it seriously now...
- the entire mussels scene... the second-hand embarassment of hearing it in french... help... Nora’s “like a pussy” somehow became “comme une belle chatte”... gold medal goes to Leah’s “lick the clit” translated by “picore-lui le clito”
Shelby’s “excuse me I have chill” ==> “pardon mais j’adore la rigolade” this is so fucking funny whyyy
ok but this scene has rights actually because Toni used the word “lesbienne” for “she can’t stand that I’m gay”
- Martha and Toni singing Juicy... but with a french accent :/
- The way they pronounce Jeanette “Djanette” like you would pronounce “Jane”...
- “Chalamet, the t is silent” ===> “Y a pas écrit -tte”. to be fair it’s impossible to translate because no french people would pronounce chalamet with the t.
- Shelby’s infamous “hi there!” became “salut les gars”. salut. les. gars
- I could have done without Fatin saying gouine when translating “people are gonna assume we’re lovers” like... what was the point
- Goodkind pronounced Good kind
- “You’re going dark on me again” ==> “Tu recommences à me bouder, sérieux.”
- “I am legit hot for you right now” / “Tu m’excites grave. j’ai trop envie de baiser avec toi.” la première partie de la phrase suffisait !!!
- They replaced Tony Romo with Matthew McConaughey for Shelby’s crush and ok, nobody knows Tony Romo in France. but Matthew McConaughey?
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twewy-comix · 7 months ago
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x4 me to die - let’s watch the twewy anime
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oh yeah wow the sub timing’s really bad lol. good thing im a fast reader! (and i also have ears)
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oh nooooo he mistakes someone else for shiki ;;; theyre really cranking up the pain of some of these scenes to 11
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ok so ive been slowly trying to get through final remix, which is easier said than done because im old now and the controls do a number on my wrist. anyway i had to fight one of those rhino things and totally forgot you have to aim at its ass. but it turns toward you whenever you hit it anyway? goddamn fucking rhinos
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alright, fun story, i didnt play twewy right when it came out because i was a baby who needed my mom and dad to buy games for me. but my VERY FIRST memory of it is wondering why the fuck this person i followed (uhh “watched”?) on deviantart kept saying “zetta slow xDDD” what does that mean, what’s slow, more like zetta annoying as shit
my opinion has not changed. 
and now i have money to spend on games and mountains of sho beanbags
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iiyo
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so they had josh call him “neku” twice before asking his name in the DS NA version, edited that out of the switch NA version, but now it’s back here
our normal friend josh! also he slow claps lmao
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alright, i was wondering how they were gonna do this--actually imo the first scan happening by accident like this makes more sense to me than the game’s “just scan me if you dont trust me” “i know that won’t work (does it anyway)”
.......but now i wanna know how the other josh scans will work out? in the game he could do it, like, secretly from afar, but is he gonna be like “hey bro dont mind me just gonna platonically touch your shoulder and stare into space for a bit, as bros do”
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more foreshadowing! ok well it’s more like straight up “these two are players now” but yeah
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there it is, the line that sparked years of twewy conspiracy theories
(...from me. are they gonna elaborate on this in neo?? I HAVE TO KNOW)
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bro we all know youre like 40
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one time i trespassed visited a junkyard with my dog and she kept jumping into all the junked cars because she wanted to go for a ride. it was adorable.
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OH NO! OH GOD! ALL THIS TIME I THOUGHT THESE THINGS WERE JUST IN THE UG BUT EVERYONE CAN SEE THEM??? #CRINGE #CRINGE #CRINGE
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it’s too much. my rage has dissipated into solemn acceptance. all i can think of to say is “ouch” and “this is really sad”
(and “wooh! w”)
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these guys are cringing too
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OH RIGHT I ALMOST FORGOT, i didnt mention it before but the reaper grunts’ designs have changed, and someone pointed out that the red ones’ is really similar to neku’s new design in neo
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chain necklace, mask, v-neck, hoodie
this has some unfortunate implications!!! (i mean assuming it IS neku, which we dont actually really know yet)
anyway
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koko de 4ne
(the subs dont even try to translate the goroawase... a blessing or a curse? u decide)
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[insert really gory sfx here]
but no blood? that’s weird. do players not have blood?? or maybe someone stepped on a burger or something. anyway this guy’s hella dead
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then sho tries to make everyone kill each other???????? but neku’s like “dont listen to that asshole” and theyre like “ok”
...yo that’s totally the mus rattus shopkeeper on the bottom left there
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gee thanks for the gamefaqs josh wouldve been useful a few days ago
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oh nvm there’s violence anyway. “what no, purple hoodie guy, purple hoodie guy no”
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BRO????
okay well now kariya and uzuki are summoning rhinos too. rhinos all over the goddamn place. goodbye, yumi sheena
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subs leave out number puns: thank you
subs translate “follow my lead” “screw that” differently: noooo whyyyy i hate funimation :’( :’( :’(
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in the game neku tells josh what happened to shiki and he’s like “happens all the time who cares lol”
here, josh already knows makes a lucky guess. because it happens all the time.
normal friend josh!
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five hours
yknow what, yeah, considering sho’s characterization here, he probably did want them to just murder the winner for the gold pin
--oh wait no this isnt the gold pin mission. but still
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“i stole it :)”
shopping tutorial’s moved way ahead to here. clearly this is foreshadowing josh’s princess umbrella, which will prove invaluable in the final battle
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man i wonder who’s responsible for making all that taboo noise? it’s a mystery
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ugh, anime is full of male gaze :///
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OH OKAY THIS IS DIFFERENT
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zowee
yooree
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:(
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♫ there’s our friend, our normal friend, there’s our normal pal josh ♫
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♫ he’s a normal guy, with red glowing eyes, he likes to think about how neku dies ♫
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what an awkward situation! luckily beat is here to punch neku in the face to break the ice, as well as neku’s jaw
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and... uh... then he leaves. the end
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♫ normal guy, breaks glass with his mind ♫
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bonus:
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The post where I try to fix Klaus’ arc in TUA season 2
(((I guess I just am an umbrella academy blogger now)))
OKAY, so we all can agree that Klaus’s arc in season 2 (mostly with dave) was....not great. the intentions i think were good, but misguided. It started pretty good, the acting was great, but it didn’t have the lasting power. Here’s 10 things the writers should have done differently, or should do in the future (as told by me, a nobody). Yes most of this is a long Klaus x Dave shitpost 
1. Learn Basic Math:   Idk why this is so hard to fucking grasp, but Dave’s baby-faced teenager age doesn’t make any fucking sense. according to the wiki, he was born in 1939, so in 1963 he is 24 years old. the actor who played young Dave is currently 20, so was probably 19 when they filmed. 
Why? why. *instert why vine*
like yeah he’s younger, but he doesn’t need to look like a infant. The baby-est gay that ever did baby gay. it puts a weird dynamic into the whole season with Klaus. and it’s not like there isn’t someone else who can play dave....
2. Hire Cody Ray Thompson again:  ....like, I’m baffled. they’ve baffled me. This guy had one(1) job, fall in love with Klaus, and he did it with so much charm and chemistry that the whole fanbase is still quaking. he had like 2 lines. like less 3 total minutes of screen time. And we all fell in love with him cause he did so good. ((he’s also a klave stan check out his twitter))
Whyyyy couldn’t they just get him in for season? “hE’d LoOk ToO OlD” well the other kid looked too damn young. do his hair different, have him lose some bulk in the arms and shoulders, get him a k-pop skin care routine, I don’t care.
Imagine if he got to have multiple scenes with Robert Sheehan, when they had so much chemistry in just a short montage in season 1.
3. Knock it off with the homophobia: i’m not gonna talk about when Dave punches klaus it’s literally the worst part of the season. it’s not what i came here for. I want a refund. (see point 7 for notes)
4. Actually make the cult a useful part of the season: like we have hundreds of adoring klaus fans ready to do anything he tells them… could that have served a plot purpose at any point? Could that have been useful in a conflict, or some character development? No?
5. Establish the Ben possessions much earlier: probably one of the most interesting plot points from season 2 is that ben had more agency. And then 5 minutes later he didn’t. I know we have 7 main characters but did we need this many scenes with the Handler while Ben got diddly fuck until the last 2 episodes? 
6: Why Doesn’t Klaus see ghosts anymore?: like, he sees Ben. but, what about all the other ones? He got sober, does he just ignore them now? ((guys what if he conjured the spirit of JFK)) 
7: (this one’s long) Make Klaus’s arc about internal conflict, not an external conflict between him and Dave:  
Klaus is established in season 1 to be selfish, but in like a fun way. he thinks of self satisfaction before literally anything else. this comes to a head when he comes back from Vietnam and says “He was the only person I’ve ever loved more than myself” 
After this Klaus’ growth is kind of put on the back-burner for the apocalypse stuff. We never really get to see him put someone else first after that. Even when he gets sober to see Dave, it’s to fulfill his own desires. 
By season 2 his world view has shifted, he gets sober, but we need more actions toward change. he gets bored of the cult and ditches them, and he barely does anything for Ben.
(selfish but lovable)
Enter tall hunky texas boy Dave, (((who is an adult man))) who is in the closet from his homophobic family, but it’s not spelled out for us. It could be as subtle as a look, or saying a coded phrase. The audience isn’t interested in the macro-drama of 1960’s homophobia, we are interested in the micro-drama between these two characters.
Anyway, Klaus is excited to see Dave, and they like meet and have a normal conversation, where it is eventually revealed that Dave is already planning on joining the marines soon. Klaus wants to stop him but then he realizes (or Ben tells him) that if Klaus says the wrong thing (like telling Dave not to go to war) it would change the timeline and they would never meet in 1968. And for the next couple EPISODES i want Klaus to have to think about this, like it’s an actual hard decision to make. He’s a creature of habit, his instincts are selfish because he’s always been selfish, but he loves this guy so much. 
Maybe he tries bargaining, like maybe he can subtly tell Dave just enough to keep him alive, but not stop him from going to Vietnam. And Dave is rightfully confused that this person knows a lot about him, but also like… he’s kinda cute. I want weird coffee shop dates and long walks through the texas fields in the setting sun.  
But right at the deadline of “we gotta stop the apocalypse again” Klaus realizes that he can’t let Dave go to Vietnam, even if it means they never meet. Cause he loves dave like way too much to even risk it, even if it means putting his own happiness second. It’s the first truly selfless act of love Klaus does for someone. So he tells him everything, but it sounds fucking bat-shit insane and Klaus has to leave right then and there. Leaving Dave standing there like “Wtf”
Later on after the Kennedy assassination, klaus and all the hargreeves’ are named as suspects, so Dave wonders if he’s just been duped by a cult leader this whole time (but also is kinda sad about it). He enlists in the marines anyway, and this is where we stay on the season one timeline.
But speaking of time-lines…….
8. Use season 3 to retcon timeline issues: like obviously they are going to fuck around with the timeline, because of the fucking bird school and emo ben. So take this opportunity, dear writers, to figure out how Klaus’s (and everyone else’s) lives make any sense, and cut some stuff from the season 1 and season 2 timelines. (and no, Klaus and Dave never falling in love in Vietnam is not a valid choice. It’s a garbage way to make me cry.)
9: Set a whole (or most of an) episode in 1968 Vietnam: maybe this is when they are trying to fix the timeline. Idk it’s just for fanservice. They have a whole 10 episodes and they can’t give just one to klaus? bullshit.
10. (Fan Theory) Reveal that Dave was killed by the commission: the true tragedy of this romance is that if Dave lived Klaus probably wouldn’t have gone back to 2019. They might have actually lived a happy life together. But the timeline needs Klaus in 2019, to be part of and die in the apocalypse, so the commission sends someone (.....maybe not Five) out to kill his boyfriend. 
Anyway it took me so many braincells to write this post and i do not accept criticism for free, so dm for my paypal if you want to tell me this was stupid.
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aryn-writes · 7 months ago
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Okay so I’ve now finished watching the anime and movie for given
And I was not expecting to feel so much, so I’ll just be posting a bit of a rant on it if you’d like to read it. This is just my thoughts, so... yeah
There are spoilers in this so if you plan to watch it, don’t read on!!!!
Again,
SPOILERS FROM THIS POINT ON
*im also crying as I write this ahaha*
We’ll start with the movie!
Starting with the music
Yeah I absolutely loved it. All the songs have been added to my playlists
Something about Mafuyu’s lyrics just... hits different. I know that’s like his whole thing but it really does hit hard. Him speaking directly to them while still reaching the audience is just amazing to me
Now the plot, also good
Since it was a movie, I understand that there wasn’t as much time to delve into everything, which is fine. It was still pretty impactful and Ugetsu’s moment at the end there where it switched to Mafuyu saying it’ll be okay truly did hurt my heart. I do wish there was more though. I would have loved to see more of Ugetsu’s and Akihiko’s pasts, both together and separately. They did give us the most important bits, but I just personally would have liked a bit more. I also want to know more about Haruki’s past, but that’s just because I feel like he hasn’t gotten as much attention.
I also really loved the interactions between Ugetsu and Mafuyu. It was just nice to see those two talk.
And I mean of course Uenoyama and Mafuyu being a couple. Definitely wish that there were more of those moments, but the ones we were given (haha let’s pretend that was a good pun) were still really cute.
Overall it was still amazing, but now we talk about the anime
Which totally broke me, and that’s why I’m talking about it second.
I did watch the anime first in case people think I went out of order, I just have intense feelings with the anime so yeah!
The first episode immediately had me just because of that initial interaction with the guitar. Uenoyama just immediately caving made me both laugh and feel that this was definitely going to go deeper.
Going on, there moments where things progress (Mafuyu panicking at seeing old friends, every time we get flashbacks, etc) I really never knew how to feel. Learning about the guitar, and how it was Yuki’s was something I expected but that it was Yuki’s mom that gave it to Mafuyu and he really knew nothing about music even though Yuki was in a band just made me realize how much this dude was struggling. He had already expressed that he really didn’t know how to express himself, which is something that I relate to, and I will in a bit talk about how much I love Mafuyu, but all of that just really made me love the show.
Now the build up to the performance.
They had no right to make me cry like that.
The flashbacks to them as kids, his dad being taken by police, Mafuyu screaming in the song after the flashback of him asking Yuki if he was willing to die for him, and then Mafuyu Finding Yuki.
Seriously I was not prepared for all of that emotion
The scream itself. Hearing it after “are you willing to die for me” made me burst.
And on a different note, I’ve been listening to that song at least twenty times a day since I finished the anime (I will be honest, it’s been almost a week. I couldn’t find time with school to watch the movie, but that’s not the point. The point is Fuyu no Hanashi hits so hard)
That performance was just amazing, and mixed with how everyone reacted just gave me goosebumps. They were all prepared to just do an instrumental set, and Mafuyu really just started singing and swept everyone away.
And then they finished the song and Uenoyama led him off stage and kissed him.
Which made me laugh so much. Like I had just cried so very hard and I could not stop laughing at Uenoyama kissing Mafuyu. I had to pause the episode to give myself a moment to just calm down.
Again I get it but just... whyyyy
So yeah overall, Amazing and I will be rewatching soon to just feel and look for foreshadowing.
And now my quick mafuyu appreciation
There were so many moments where I just related entirely to Mafuyu. His character development was subtle, but also so obvious and I loved it. Him realizing things about himself, understanding and accepting what happened, it all just... it made me want more of his character.
Anyways, I love given. That’s all this is. It’s wonderful.
If you read all of this and haven’t seen it, go see it. If you’re reading this and you have seen it, maybe think about rewatching it.
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bonnieglens · 11 months ago
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Tha beagan Gàidhlig agam a-nis
Halò agus fàilte mo charaidean! My name's Bruno and I live in Southern Brazil (Ceann an deas sa Bhraisil). I started learning Gàidhlig about 1 year and a half ago. The first year was a lonely one. In Brazil I couldn't imagine there were people learning any Gàidhlig given its status nowadays (an endangered language restricted to the northern Highlands and Islands). I am an English teacher and quite a linguophile (love languages). I started with English when I was 11 years old, then Spanish (yeah, Brazilians don't speak Spanish, we speak Portuguese) and then I went through a miscellaneous language path...German, Norwegian, French, Hindi, Latin but didn't master any of those (but I intend to). Gàidhlig was a call, I could say, I've always loved Celtic history and the marvellous aspects of the many Celtic cultures. My first attempt to learn a Celtic language was Geilge (Irish) but something didn't get me and the lack of resources demotivated me. Gàidhlig entered my life through the Disney film "Brave" which portrays the young Merida (a Scottish princess) fighting against tradition to follow her own heart. The first Gàidhlig was through the song "A Mhaighdean Bhan Uasal" or "Noble Maiden fair" in English. I felt a sudden urge to know the meaning of that alluring song, it called to my soul.
I then followed the steps towards learning about this language. First I read everywhere it was a "dead" or very rare language, almost impossible to learn due to the lack of speakers. I felt sad, of course. When I saw the spelling I was alarmed, so different from any language I'd ever studied. In search for books I found a website (learngaelic.net) which was my salvation and starting point. At first I was shocked to see programmes such as "Speaking our language" using Gàidhlig in the 20th century. My belief was that the language was something like Latin or Old Norse, restricted to past manifestations. My first words were "Halò, Madainn mhath" and "Ciamar a tha sibh?". It was nice to see that Gàidhlig sounded familiar (the word "madainn" sounds a lot like the Portuguese and French one "Matinal" and "Matin" which mean "in the morning"). I got demotivated along the way, five months later or so. I didn't have a soul to talk to and I was more of a lost learner than an experienced one. Lenitions? Why? Whyyyy? GH, DH sounds (screams)! It was frustrating and nobody could tell me "Gabh air do shocair, a bhalaich" (take it easy, boy). I stopped for some time. Then in 2020 I decided I wanted to go back and learn Gàidhlig but this time I wanted to have people to talk to. I started my own Gàidhlig group "Tha Gàidhlig an seo" (I thought the name sounded quite authentic lol) and on Facebook I started "Gàidhlig Bhraisil" and created a Google Classroom and WhatsApp group. I started by trying to pass on what I knew already (not much) and spreading the word. In time, I found the best people to learn Gàidhlig with. Friends from Canada, Scotland and impressively BRAZILIANS. 3 Brazilians learning Gàidhlig apart from me. I was amazed. Now we have this wonderful group, we meet often and learn and laugh a lot together. My Gàidhlig has improved tremendously and I couldn't be more thankful to them for being a motivational lot and helpful. We hope that in 2021 we'll learn more, share more and grow more together! Bidh sinn a fas nas fheàrr, tha mi cinnteach!
Mòran taing dhuibh, a h-uile duine! Is sibhse sgoinneil!! 🥰
Sin e, ma-thà!
Bliadhna mhath ùr!
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appleteez · a year ago
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The New One (1)
Pairing: Changkyun x reader
Genre: Crack, High school au.
Word count: 1375
A/N: Yes, I’m starting a new Monsta x series. I’m actually excited for this one, I like what I did so far. Let me know what you think !! :)
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“Today class we’re welcoming a new stud—“ The words just fade in the background as I concentrate more on the leaves falling from the huge trees outside our classroom. From the third floor, just by the window, I had the perfect view. I couldn’t wait for my senior year, when I’m finally gonna be on the fourth floor, now that’s gonna be amazing. My eyes move to the courtyard and I see my best friend Hyungwon coming in running his face all red. I smile lightly thinking about his dumbass oversleeping like usual, even on the first day back, this guy has no exception.
“Y/N !!” I snap back and stand up quickly, looking at my professor with huge eyes.
“Y—Yes?”
“I asked you to raise your hand multiple times ! Because Hyungwon is late again, Changkyun will take his place.”
“Ah.. But I just saw him running in..” I weakly point out the window.
“He’s gonna have to go by the attendance office anyway to get a pass, so he won’t be here for another five minutes. Too bad for him. Changkyun go sit next to Y/N.”
“Ugh..” I say more annoyed at my professor, but I can see a slight sorry look on the new boy’s face.
“Plus it wouldn’t be so bad to separate you two.” He mumbles starting to get the textbooks together.
“Whatever.” I mumble back.
“Hi..” Changkyun sits next to me embarrassed and obviously extremely uncomfortable.
“Hi.” I say maybe a little more cold than I wanted.
The door soon opens on a out of breath Hyungwon that quickly realized the situation.
“How am I going to cheat now?” He says a little louder than expected making the whole class laugh and the professor redden out of anger. --- The bell for the first break comes faster than expected. Jooheon, and Minhyuk, the sunshines of the class don’t wait one second to come talk to Changkyun.
“Changkyun right? Don’t mind Y/N, she’s always a bit grumpy, except around Hyungwon and Hyunwoo.” Jooheon snickers.
“Hyunwoo is an upperclassman. Those three are inseparable, it’s kinda weird so don’t feel bad about it.”
“Shut up you two !”
“They’re called the lazy squad. They only sleep and eat. Hyungwon always sleeps in class and Hyunwoo always eats in class, it’s actually impressive.” Minhyuk says with a huge smile actually impressed.
“What about Y/N?” Changkyun asks shyly.
“Oh she doesn’t waste time, she does both.”
“I said shut up !” I say in between my teeth trying not to bring attention to me.
“Y/N, let’s go upstairs, Hyunwoo said he has extra dumplings for us.” Hyungwon comes already looking half asleep like he didn’t waste time on recuperating some sleep during the first periods. I sigh at the accuracy of our little trio described by the two sunshines and nod slowly.
“Let’s go.” I stand up to join Hyungwon out of the classroom.
“I feel bad that I took her friend’s sit.”
“Don’t, those two, well those three are always together. Like the professor said, it wouldn’t be too bad to separate them.” Jooheon laughs lightly. --- The end of the day finally comes. Me, Hyunwoo and Hyungwon are in the “go home club”, which exactly like the name explains, we’re not in clubs. It’s usually not well seen at all, like at all, which only reinforce Minhyuk and Jooheon’s description.
“You guys, we should do something with our lives.” I say out of the blue as we’re about to pass the school’s gates.
“Uh?” They both turn around looking at me weird.
“Well, that’s what we’re gonna do.”
“You mean going to 7/11, reading manga for an hour without buying them, then going to eat snacks by the river?”
“Sounds like life to me.” Hyunwoo smiles making his eyes into crescents.
“I don’t know.. We’ve gotten worst than before. Hyunwoo, you used to be captain of the swimming team in middle school, what happened? I used to be the team captain of my soccer team back in middle school ! What happened !!!” I lowkey panic.
“Hey, what about me?” Hyungwon says a little hurt.
“You stood on the basketball court in middle school?”
“Yeah.” He smiles looking satisfied.
“Hey!” I turn around to the new deep voice and see Changkyun running towards us his hand in the air.
“Uh?” I say squinting my eyes making sure I was not turning blind.
“Are you guys going home together?”
“I guess?” I say still squinting my eyes putting my head back enough to show some double chins. Yeah, that’s how shook I was.
“Can I join?” He says a little embarrassed as if his small leap of courage had disappeared.
“Sure~ We’re going to 7/11 to read manga for half an hour without buying them, then we’re going to eat snack by the river.” Hyunwoo says smiling almost like a seal.
“Hyun—“
“I don’t see why not.” Hyungwon says smiling too, and I feel the strap of my bag fall from my shoulder.
“Thanks, I’m Changkyun by the way.”
“Hyunwoo.” They introduce themselves and start walking, leaving me there in awe.
“Hey..” I say weakly. --- To say I was not pleased was an understatement. Since high school started, I started living in a shared house held by an older woman. She had this old traditional house, and rents the four rooms to students due to all the high schools in the neighborhood. I was sitting at the dinner table eating what she had made for the night, and in front of me…
“Changkyun..” I say between my teeth.
“Yes?” He looks up from his bowl and I just fall backwards whining.
“WHYYYY ! Why are you here?” I sit back quickly slapping my hands on the table.
“Y/N careful you’re gonna spill everything.” Kihyun one of my housemates says between his teeth. Kihyun was adorable, he went to an all boy school and was top of his class.
“Grandma !!” A sandal comes flying to my face and I fall backwards again.
“Stop calling me grandma, I’m only 30 !!!”
“Bora don’t listen to her, you look amazing.” Hoseok, our fourth housemates, says all smiley.
“Hoseok, you’re a cutie. You!” She points at me trying to look serious, but Bora was just too nice and adorable for that. “Be careful I have my eyes and ears on you. Changkyun is living here now you deal with it. Now eat !”
After all the food finished, we clean everything up and Hoseok and Kihyun start to put their stuff out to start their homework. I stand up and walk towards the hallway.
“Y/N? You’re not studying with us?” Kihyun says surprised.
“I’ll just do it in my room.” I leave them behind a little surprised by my sudden distance towards them.
“What’s wrong with her?” Kihyun says a little annoyed.
“Maybe she just wants to be alone.” Hoseok tries to calm him down.
“I think it’s because of me. I took Hyungwon’s sit.”
“Oh..” They both say a little taken aback.
“Is it that bad?”
“Y/N, is not a bad person, let’s start with that.” Hoseok says a little panicked.
“She has a little bit of separation anxiety. She kinda grew up going from shared houses to shared houses, because her parents are out of the country. Hyungwon and Hyunwoo are basically what she has closest to a family here cause they grew up together so, by taking Hyungwon away…”
“She feels a bit uncomfortable?” Changkyun says understanding the situation.
“She’s not a bad person, once she gets warmed up to you, you’ll see she’s a lot of fun.” Hoseok smiles showing all of his pearlies. --- The small fan on my floor desk was turning slowly spitting as much air as she could. I try to focus on my homework but something keeps coming back into my mind.. Changkyun is incredibly cute..
“Ugh.. What the fuck Y/N..” I say to myself letting myself fall back onto the floor once again tonight. I put my arm over my head trying to hide my red cheeks, when I hear a snicker. I take my arm off and see Bora leaning over me.
“You got a crush Y/N?”
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sugdenlovesdingle · a year ago
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Based on this anon’s wrong opinion
Red (AO3 link)
----- "Girls, tea's ready!" Aaron shouted up the stairs and made his way over to the table where Robert was serving up their food.
"Seb, off." Robert said pointing a spoon at his son's head.
"But dad..." Seb whined.
"Don't but dad me. Off. Now."
"But whyyyy?"
"because we said so." Aaron plucked the beanie off his head in passing and dropped it on the table next to his elbow. "Not at the table, you know that. We'd like to actually see your face sometime."
"You can see my face just fine when I wear it." Seb protested.
"His face is stupid anyway." his little sister Ruby said as she and Eve joined the rest of the family at the table, and the two girls giggled when Seb glared at them.
"Alright, enough of that. Can we just enjoy one family meal without you two winding each other up? Please?" Robert asked as he sat down. There was a mumbled sort of agreement coming from both kids that he took as a yes. "Thank you."
The argument was a regular occurrence in their house. Ever since Seb had been old enough to dress himself he'd started wearing hoodies and caps or beanies. They mostly just let him, especially since Aaron himself still wore hoodies too, and even with the hood up if he was cold or tired, but Robert had insisted on both of them taking them off at the dinner table ever since Seb was about 8 and he and Aaron were both hidden away under their hoodies.
He'd just turned 13 now and almost every day, either Robert or Aaron had to all but surgically remove the hat from his head when they sat down for tea.
The second Seb finished eating he grabbed his beanie and went upstairs to his room.
“All this drama over a damn beanie.” Robert sighed.
“It’s so you won’t see his hair.” Ruby told her parents.
“What’s wrong with his hair?”
“It’s red.”
“So?”
“He doesn’t like it.”
“And Danielle Philips doesn’t either.” Eve added.
“Who?”
“This girl from school that he likes.”
Aaron looked back and forth between his daughter and his little sister.
“How do you two even know that?”
Later that night, after the kids had gone to bed and Robert and Aaron were lying on the sofa watching TV together, Aaron couldn’t switch off his brain and kept thinking about what the girls had told them during tea.
“Do you think we should talk to him?”
“Hmm? Who?”
“Seb. If it’s true what the girls are saying... I don’t want him to feel bad because some girl doesn’t like him back because of his hair.”
“But we don’t know if that’s the reason. He’s been wearing caps and things for years.”
“Well... who knows how long he’s liked this girl. Maybe he was trying to impress her?”
“By wearing a hat?”
Aaron shrugged.
“People do crazy things when they’re in love.”
“Yeah like stealing cars and breaking and entering.” Robert teased.
“Or faking a breakdown.” Aaron shot back but then softened. “Or planning some mad wedding in less than a day.”
“Or writing this ridiculously romantic speech and starting with you’re smug and arrogant.”
“And yet you still married me. Three times.” Aaron held up 3 fingers.
“Sometimes I wonder why.” Robert leaned in and kissed him deeply. “Oh right, that’s why.” he turned off the TV and grabbed Aaron’s hand. “Let’s put those three fingers to better use upstairs.”
A few days later, when they’d both decided to work from home for the day because the space heater at the yard had finally given up, Seb came home earlier than usual, carrying a plastic bag and looking shifty.
“What are you doing home so early?” Aaron asked, looking up from the accounts he was working on.
Seb jumped.
“Oh... uh... science got cancelled. Teacher is sick.”
Aaron and Robert shared a look.
“Right.”
“It’s the truth! Seb insisted.
“So you won’t mind me calling Moira to ask if Isaac got home early too then?” Robert asked.
Seb shrugged.
“Go ahead. It’s the truth.”
“Never mind.” Robert shook his head. “I believe you. What’s in the bag?”
“Nothing! Just uh... my PE kit.”
“Your PE kit? Since when do you carry that around in a plastic bag from Boots?”
“I lost my other bag.”
“Did you now?” Aaron asked as he got up and walked over to the coat rack. “This bag?” He held up the bag with Seb’s PE kit.
“Oh! There it is!”
“You’re a terrible liar, kiddo.” 
“Sebastian,” Robert started and Seb winced. He knew he was in trouble whenever his parents used his full name. “What’s in the bag?”
“Nothing. Just... stuff. Personal stuff!”
“Personal stuff?”
“Yes! Very personal. Condoms!” Seb said, hoping that would make his parents back off.
“Condoms?” Aaron asked. “Did you buy a life supply? That bag seems kind of full.”
“I uh... bought a few different kinds. I wasn’t sure which ones would be best.”
“I didn’t know you were going out with anyone.”
“It’s uh... not been long...”
“And you’re ready to take the next step already? It must be serious then.”
“Yeah, yeah... when you know, you know.” Seb said, repeating the phrase he’d heard his father say often over the years.
“Well we’re proud of you for being responsible.” Robert told him.
Seb nodded.
“Sure. I’m just going to go to my room now.” he turned around to run up the stairs, only to find his path blocked by his other father.
“What’s in the bag that’s so bad you’d rather talk about sex with your parents than tell us?” Aaron asked and held out his hand.
Seb reluctantly handed over the bag.
Aaron looked inside and frowned.
“Hair dye?” He took out one of the boxes and held it up. “There’s at least 5 different ones in there.”
Seb bit his lip and looked at his shoes.
“What’s going on? Why do you want to dye your hair?”
“Why do you think?!” Seb yanked the beanie off his head and pointed at his hair. “It’s red! I hate it! I’m sick of it! I want to be normal!”
“Who told you, you weren’t normal?” Robert asked, walking over to his son and husband.
Seb shrugged.
“Nobody. I just don’t like it. I want to be like everyone else.”
“Why? Are you being bullied?”
“Not really...” Seb mumbled. “I’m just sick of being the red one. Even Isaac calls me red!”
“Why don’t you tell him you don’t like it?”
“I have!”
“But he still does it?”
“Sometimes... he tries not to...” Seb sighed and sat down on the bottom step of the stairs. “I’m just sick of standing out... I want to be normal like you.” he said to Aaron.
Aaron glanced at the box in his hand and noticed the dye was roughly the same colour as his own hair. Oh.
“You want to be like me? Why?”
“Nobody teases you over the colour of your hair... And dad still fancies you.”
Robert sat down next to Seb and put an arm around his shoulders.
“Is that what this is about? Someone you fancy that doesn’t like your hair?”
“Kind of...” Seb admitted.
“And you think that will change if you dye it dark brown?”
“I don’t know...”
“I do.” Aaron said, squatting down in front of them and putting his hands on Seb’s knees. “If they don’t like you with red hair, they’re not going to like you with brown hair. And if they suddenly do, then they’re not worth your time.”
“Easy for you to say. You and dad have been married forever.”
“Yeah but it really wasn’t the colour of his hair that did it for me. I fell in love with him, all of him. And I would have still done that if he’d had red hair like you.”
“Yeah, me too.” Robert agreed. “Listen, if you want to dye your hair because you want to, then let’s do it. We’ll help you.”
“Yeah?”
“Of course. We can touch up your dad’s grey roots while we’re at it.” Robert teased and Aaron slapped his knee. “But if you’re just doing this to get someone to like you... it’s not worth it.”
“When you find the right person, they’ll like you no matter what colour your hair is.” Aaron told Seb.
“You think so?”
“I know so.”
“Or maybe you’ll meet someone some day who first notices you because of your red hair, and that’s their favourite thing about you.”
“That’ll never happen.”
“You don’t know that. Look at Prince Harry.”
“Who?”
“Prince William’s brother. He married this really beautiful actress and his hair looked just like yours.”
“And there is Ron, Harry Potter’s best friend. He’s a famous wizard.” Robert added.
“He’s also not real.”
“But the actor is. I think he was even younger than you are now when he got the part for the first film. And his entire on screen family all had red hair too.”
“So? That doesn’t mean anything.”
“No, you’re right. The opinions of a few kids from your school holds so much more weight than millions of people around the world with hair like yours, living their lives, doing jobs they love, studying things they love, loving who they love... that all means nothing because someone at school says they don’t like your hair.”
“I didn’t say that...” Seb wiped his eyes. “I just don’t want them to call me names anymore... and there is this girl at school... I really like her... but she said she wouldn’t go out with a ginger minger. So I thought...if I changed that...she’d like me back.”
Robert pulled him close and kissed the top of his head.
“You know what I think? I think you’re really cute with your red hair. It’s one of the things I’ve always loved about you. Everyone kept telling us it’d probably turn blond like mine and your mum’s when you got older, but I always hoped it wouldn’t.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, definitely.”
Seb didn’t say anything but just played with a loose thread on his jumper.
“Do you still want to dye your hair?” Aaron asked after a minute.
“Would you be mad?”
“Not as long as you do it because you want to.”
Seb nodded.
“I think... I think I need to think about it a little while longer...”
“That’s ok. This stuff will keep.” Aaron said, getting up and rubbing the cramp out of his thighs. “But remember, you can always come talk to us if something is bothering you. Or help you dye your hair.”
“Thanks dad.” Seb gave him a small smile. “Both of you.”
“That’s what we’re here for, mate.” Robert told him. “And just so you know, when you do buy condoms and start having sex, you can come talk to us too.”
“DAD!” Seb said horrified and slipped out of his father’s embrace and ran up the stairs to his room.
“That went well.” Aaron deadpanned when they heard Seb’s bedroom door slam shut.
Robert laughed and got up from the stairs.
“One step at a time.”
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fluffy-lee · a year ago
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Ice Breaker
This is a TICKLE fic
Platonic Peter Parker x Reader
Summary: Y/n Barnes really wants to be closer friends with the newest superhero, Peter Parker, but she is hoping for something to finally break the ice between the two of them.
A/n: This is an old fic I wrote a long time ago! I think before I even created this blog! It sparked the idea for my series Keeping Her.
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It was early in the evening and  I was relaxing in the lounge in the Avengers facility watching one of my favorite house-flipping shows. I was sitting on the giant, comfy couch and Steve was laying next to me, taking a nap. My father, Bucky Barnes, walked in.
  "Y/N I have a little surprise for you," Bucky said with a smirk.
  "For me?!" I asked all perky.
He opened the door wider and some weird white string looking thing shot to the ceiling. Then, Spider-Man swung in. I gasped.
  "OH MY GOSH!!" I squealed,  jumping on the couch.
Steve woke up, startled.
"Oh hey there kid," he yawned.
  "Hey Y/n! Hey Cap!" Peter said, hanging upside down from the ceiling.
He dropped down from the tall ceiling with ease, landed in a squatting position, stood up to where he towered over me a bit, and ripped his mask off.
He is so cute and I feel nervous around him. We won't ever be a thing though. That's just not how it is between us and I am happy with that. I had only met him a few times anyway and I didn't know him very well yet, but he was always really nice. I wanted to be closer friends with him, but I was a bit shy. I was waiting for something to break the ice between us.
 I instantly hugged him and he hugged me back.
  "I'm so happy to see you again." I said sheepishly.
  "Well I'm so happy to see you too! You HAVEN'T grown an inch." He jokes.
Everyone in the room chuckled. Tony, Pepper, Wanda, and Vision all came in the room. 
 All eight of us ended up chatting for hours. I began to feel so much more comfortable around Peter and even  played a little prank on him. I thought that could be the ice breaker that would help our friendship grow.  Peter had been telling us how he had lost so many backpacks, and when he wasn't looking, I hid his backpack behind a plant in the corner. 
It started to get a bit late, but we were still having a good time and I felt tons more confident around Peter instead of being shy.
  "Well I'm gonna head to bed. It's been a long day," Steve said.
Then, Steve smirked at me deviously.     "I wouldn't be if SOMEBODY hadn't woke me up from my nap."
"I was just excited to see Spider-Man... you OLD man!" I said playfully, and everyone chuckled and went back to having their separate conversations.
"Ohhhohohoho you're gonna regret that," Steve said and wiggled his fingers toward me.
I blushed like crazy.
  "Uhhhhh S-Steve umm nonono," I said nervously.
"Whyyyy?" Steve asked with a knowing smile.
"Be-because.."
"You need to be more specific," Steve said, threatening me by wiggling his fingers closer toward my tummy. He was ready to tickle me, which was a common occurrence.
"Not in front of Spider-Man." I said a bit too loud.
Peter chuckled at me and I blushed bad.
Steve's eyes widened with a bigger smile. "WHY?"
  "Because I think he's really cool a-and I want him to think I'm cool, you know? He's younger than all of you guys... and I don't have any friends my age." I whispered to him, truthfully.
I was sure Peter wasn't hearing any of this, he wasn't close enough and seemed to be listening to Tony speaking. Steve frowned at me.
  "Ohhh. Well, you don't need to try so hard. Just be yourself, little buddy," he encouraged, ruffling my hair.
  "Yeah but he's so smart, you know? And I'm dumb. I was just an experiment and never learned like other kids." I  frowned.
Steve gave me a sad look.
  "We need to go upstairs and have a talk. You need to get to bed soon anyway." Steve said.
We said our good nights to everyone and made our way upstairs. Steve threw me over his shoulder and I giggled, waving bye to Peter. He waved back with a soft grin.
  We got to my room and Steve flipped me down onto the bed, making me laugh. He sat down next to me and gave me a long speech about how I should be myself. He told me I was smart and funny and a wonderful person. He had really been helping me with my confidence. He made me feel better, but I still had a few negative thoughts, and I was still a bit sad. Steve could tell.
  "Look kid, you hang in there alright? I know you're still having a bit of trouble,  but you are making so much progress after what you've been through. I know you're still a little sad and that's okay." Steve reassured.
He hugged me goodnight and kissed my cheeks. I got under the covers and he turned off my light.
"I love you, y/n. I'm right down the hall if you need anything." He said.
"Okay, I love you too..... and thank you, Uncle Steve." I said.
He smiled at me and left, shutting the door. I quickly drifted off to sleep.
   I woke up at about 1:30 A.M. really thirsty. I didn't have any water by my bed, so I decided to go down to the kitchen to get some. As I made my way through the Avengers facility, or what I simply call "home," I was a little scared. It was dimly lit and I was afraid some giant superhero like Vision was going to pop up. He is nice and all, but sometimes Vision just goes through walls like a ghost and that gives me the creeps. I made it down to the kitchen and I climbed the counter to get a cup down. I'm kind of short, and the Avengers like to tease me about it, but it doesn't bother me. I think it's funny.
I filled my glass from the fridge and stood there chugging the water. I then refilled my glass and drank more. I finished and turned around to an upside down Spider-Man inches from my face! I screamed but his hand quickly covered my mouth.
"Peter Parker!" I hissed. "You scared the heck out of me!"
"I'm sorry, but.... I need to talk to you." His tone sounded as if I was in trouble with him.
I set my glass on the counter.
"Um... okay." I said nervously.
Peter dropped down to where he was standing right side up and ripped his mask off, shaking his hair. Again, a pretty nice sight to see, if I'm being honest.
"So, I was at a few parties in the facility, just swinging around, when I realized I was missing my backpack..." Peter explained and my eyes definitely widened.
Oh yeah... I hid his backpack.
"I returned to the living room where I left it, but it was gone. Explain." He demanded, towering over me.
"I-I don't know where it is," I said sheepishly, looking down.
"Y/n, look me in the eyes. Bucky told me you were a little prankster. Now where is it?"
"Umm.. it's your backpack that you lost, Mr. Spider," I said with a little sassiness... just a little too much.
Peter raised an eyebrow at me and picked me up by my underarms.
"We can do this the easy way or the hard way, Y/n!"
I was loving this. I love playfulness. I giggled.
"You think this is funny, huh?" Peter asked.
I nodded, giggling a bit more. I saw him crack a smile, but he quickly hid it.
"You remember earlier tonight when you said "not in front of Spider-Man"? That sure was interesting... Hmm. Why did you say that?" He asked mischievously.
My heart dropped to my stomach and I turned red.
"Ah yes, and you blushed just like that." He pointed at my face, smirking.
He sat me on the counter and I giggled nervously. 
"What was that about, huh?" Peter said resting his chin on his hand, looking really closely into my eyes.
Dang it, Steve..
"Uh nothing! You know me and Steve were just messing around. I-I b-bet he took your backpack." I lied some more.
I was just so deep in lies, I kept digging more. Peter stood up straight and put his hands on his hips.
"Come on, Y/n. Really?" Peter chuckled, shaking his head. 
I smiled shyly at him.
"What was it that you wanted Steve not to do in front of me?" Peter asked, pretending to think.
My heart was pounding out of my chest. He was so skilled at teasing. He was super witty and knew just how to get to someone. I squeezed my arms close to my torso, trying to be discrete.
"It couldn't be that you're ...ticklish." Peter said and widened his eyes at me, like a cat about to attack.
I leapt off the counter and made a run toward the nearest door, leading to one of the lounging areas. 
 Peter quickly caught me and threw me on the couch, and began to tickle my sides causing me to burst out in laughter. Peter seemed taken back at first at how ticklish I was.
"Oh my goodness! How cute! I didn't know,"  He said in a high-pitched voice, giggling at me while he began spidering up and down my ribs and sides.
His tickling skills were really good. I'd never had something tickle me that much... until he attacked my tummy.
"Oh, THIS has to be your most ticklish spot," he said with a squinty smile, digging into my tummy.
He was correct. I was laughing like crazy and nearly screamed. It took everything in me not to scream, because I'd definitely didn't want to wake people up. I couldn't breathe and his tickles were too much for me to take.
"PETER! HAHAHAhahaha Peterherherherrrr! Hold ohohohnn!" I desperately pleaded through my laughter.
To my surprise, Peter halted his attack.
"What is it?" He asked.
"I ju-just need t-to breathe... You're a really good tickler," I said and then, I went pale.
Did I really just say that?
Peter's eyes grew wide and he just, kind of, froze and so did I. Then, he smirked and shot his hands under my arms and I brought my arms down, trapping his fingers.
"Well if I'm such a good tickler, then I should be able to get you to tell me WHERE MY BACKPACK IS!" Peter demanded, wiggling his fingers in such a deadly way.
I was so flustered, and in such tickle agony, I immediately shouted where I hid his backpack.
THIS KID THEN LIFTS ME UP BY MY UNDERARMS AND STARTS WALKING DOWN THE HALL TO THE ROOM.
I had to face him while he carried me, and even occasionally tickled my armpits while he carried me, causing me to squeal. I guess he could do this due to his super strength.
We reached the room and Peter looked behind the plant while still holding me.
"Good thing you didn't lie to me," he said and put me down.
I shyly looked up at him and then I bravely said "I hope you learned your lesson."
"Y/n, I haven't lost my backpack in about 6 months. Those stories were old." He said proudly.
"Oh, good for you" I said looking at the ground.
Peter chuckled and ruffled my hair, "Go to bed you little dork."
"Well you really wore me out. I think I'll just sleep here on the couch." I decided.
Peter laughed. "I could just carry you, if you want me to." He offered.
"Sure." I said happily, reaching my arma up to him. I loved being carried.
Peter surprised me by lifting me up by my armpits AGAIN.
"Nooononono not this again!"
"Why not?" Peter asked slyly and then tickled again causing me to shriek. He tickled for a little bit longer while I just laughed, only able to kick my legs. 
He finally scooped me up in his arms and carried me to my room while I laid my head on his shoulder, nearly asleep. When we reached my room he placed me in my bed, and covered me up.
"Goodnight Y/n. I'll see you soon alright?" Peter said sweetly.
"Okay, Peter."
I smiled at him.
Peter cleared his throat. "And uhh it's great to see that you are doing so well. I'm proud of you."
"Oh.. thank you so much, Peter."
If only he knew how much that meant to me. As long as I've known him I've always looked up to him.
"Sure... and thanks for all the giggles!" Peter winked and turned off my lamp.
"Night Spidey."
After he left, I quickly dozed off to sleep with a smile on my face.
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shesawriter39049 · a year ago
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|GOD SAVE THE QUEEN|M|JH|
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(Does he not look like he should be scaleing a damn window?!)
SMUT/ ANGST
Pairing: Hitman Hoseok & Mob Boss OC
Genre: Mob/Mafia/Organized Crime/Drug cartels/Established/unofficial but lowkey official couple...
WC-10K (A good 3-4 of it is smut btw) 
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 “I’m going to fall a fucking part, and so will my families empire and then what!? WHO the fuck are they going to blame then!? Huh? Definitely not my damn brother, he’s too coked out to even tie his fuckign shoe laces neverthless run the family business!”
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Note- This is old...I have a TON of mob/mafia-related “Pilot” chapters as I call them..stashed in my google Docs! This is a heaverier/ agngisterst read by the way, not a downer but just heavy ya know? It works just fine as a stand alone, but by the end of it you can tell that when I initially wrote it I was setting it up to be a series! One that would eventually involve the other boys as well, so there is some backstory!
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Hoseok;s tatted, and just radiates soft dom energy…and tbh that’s all we need in this world
The OC is stressed, and needs a damn hug...the end!
Warnings: (Nonsexual- Strong language, mentions of guns, drugs/drug use and addictions, violence and mentions of chronic illness..not pertaining to Hoseok though)  
Warnings- Soft Dom Hoseok, breathe play, slight pain kink(very minimal prep before sex...by choice) overstimulation, handjobs, light come play, spit play, chill dirty talk....unprotected sex.Semi public sex-ish(in her office while the guards are outside the door...)
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Hibiscus island, Miami Florida 8PM 
‘Alright, so I’m looking at about, a half kilo of snow, hmmm, maybe a little over a quart of skag and a couple hundred Tabs of Molly…”
The line went dead on the receiving end causing the man in question to attempt the phrase again…maybe his connection was bad?
“Helll-lo? Boss I said I-”
“I heard you. Was there a an actual question in there somewhere or where you just letting me know your eyes still work?” The level of just…. dry...that fell from his tongue just now….
“Well I-umm no.No...I just wasn't told exactly what was being retrieved from the plane so I just wanted to make sure this was accurate and noth-”  The scoff that rung through the other end was borderline humiliating, as if to imply there's no way in hell he could even think this was “accurate”.
“No Mark, it’s far from accurate, but what you see in front of you is what’s there…”
Ahhh, so that explains his happy go lucky sunshine personality at the moment.
“Okay, well I’ll have this sorted and get the plane sterilized, am I sending this down to the west wing for a quality check first or is this just being disbursed to the runners?”
A deep agitated goan rattled in his throat, god whyyyy does everybody have so many questions today!?
“Just-just put it in one of the storage units for now, I’ll deal with it later” Hanging up the call before any more questions could be rendered because he honestly didn't have the patience to even pretend like he cared right now! The minute the call dropped his phone buzzed indicating he’d receive about his 8th text in a row from a person he’s a second away from releasing a full barrel face on! 
It took every ounce of self control not to just let the phone slip out of his hand and shatter against the patternized stone walkway swirling beneath his feet!
Clearly,Hoseok’s not in a good mood, like, at all...there’s just so much floating through his mind right now he’s practically running out of space to even breathe! 
He’s tired, Irritable, that earth-shattering smile of his is nowhere to be found, instead it appears to have been replaced by a semi-permanent snarl. Oh, and the best part, Germany, yeah that was a complete and utter shit show. It was supposed to just be a simple negotiation in regards to you guys expanding to a new territory. Yet he feels like the last thing he did was actually talk, I mean fuck palms still feel as though they’ve been damn near rubbed raw at this point.  Hours, that’s how long it took to rid his otherwise delicately stealth hands of their custom crimson overlay! And to make life even better, he’s the one who has the pleasure of sitting down and debriefing the whole failed mission to you! 
So yay, he loves that for himself...truly…
 Everything just feels heavy, his head, heart hell, even his spirit at his point! Feet dragging through the opulent Medetriann style courtyard as if they weigh more than he did. The only thing that somewhat has Hoseok in a decent mood was you, the fact that he’d be able to see you in person after what felt like 6 years, which in all actuality was a little shy of 5 days! 
Easing his way through oversized dual french doors, into an area that essentially acted as the east wing's  “Lobby” if you will, panes of white walls, and thick black arched windows framed the entryway. The dim lighting hanging from the cast iron chandelier gave the effect that the stark white walls were almost glowing against the moonlight peeking in. My point? The atmosphere appears calm at first glance, warm..inviting...everything Hoseok needs it to be right now because again he’s NOT in the mood for bullshit. All he’s dealt with over the past 120 some odd hours was bullshit! Hint’s why your European connect is a good, meh, four soldiers down at the moment!
I can’t say Hoseok had a specific…”Greeting” in mind upon strolling back into the compound tonight…..
However, what I can guarantee is the soundtrack that is you going full hulk mode in your office, while your guards stood outside looking like bats outta hell, definitely wasn’t high on his list! The men stationed at the security desk were already whipping their heads around before he even pulled the door open. Ah the beauty of cameras, at this point they weren’t sure what was worse. You, playing whack a mole behind the wall or Hoseok’s reaction once he put two and two together! 
It takes all of 3 steps before another piece of something glass and undeniably expensive shatters against the wall. Accompanied by a loud grunt on your behalf, voice breathy and fragile, which lets him know you’ve been at this for a while. 
The level of just, exhaustion he could hear heaving from your throat is what had him more alarmed than anything else. The fact that you clearly didn’t have the self-control to tell your body to stop…which isn't like you at all! I mean fuck, how long have you been in there?! Hoseok’s heart was beating so loud he could hear it pulsing through his ears! 
“What the fuck did you guys do?!” The first and only thing to leave his lips as he huffs towards the control desk. The guard initially stationed in front of the camera’s, rolled his seat to the far left within seconds. Allowing his superior the space to do whatever he needs, they heard Hoseok’s mouse make about 1 good click before…
“Fuckkkkk” Cursed from his lips with enough depth to bounce off every surface in the room. There was an additional gruffness laced within his tone due to lack of sleep.. which almost made the sound more initiating, borderline animalistic. Hoseok’s voice actually broke towards the end, the growl dying on his tongue before it even started. Head bowing towards the monitor as he rocked forward, attempting to re-center himself. Keyword there….”Attempting”
Precipitously, there’s another sound rattling the air and no, it’s not another object flying against the wall ,it’s Hoseok’s fist...right into the marble desktop! Yup, there are no cameras in your office...why? Because you and the man in question have no fucking self-control...which suddenly he’s really, really regretting! Well, actually, there are cameras, however they can only be turned on from inside the office,and he already knew you turned the feed off! That’s why he’s on 10 because he can’t see you..at all! You could be hurting yourself in the process and he’d have no idea! The entrance to your office is camouflage for obvious reasons, to naked eye one wouldn't even know there was an office!
Even as your consigliere Hoseok didn’t ask for much, never has, not a big fan of relying on others to handle his needs...hmm wonder why he got to that point. Still, an unspoken rule of thumb when he leaves..is it’s every mother fucker's job within the compound, hell even the damn birds that frequent the garden! Everyone, needs to do their part to make sure he dosen’t come back to this..especially with the way things have shifted internally as of late! 
And by “This” I mean you having a mental breakdown in your office, because you aren’t one to just break shit for shits and giggles! This isn’t how you deal with a transaction going south, or a distributor sending over a bad strand of coke.. something’s wrong..really fucking wrong! 
Silent, dead silent, that's what Hoseok was, and that was utterly terrifying, your men knew to give him his space, that he’d address them when he’s ready. All the while carefully observing the way his fingers twitched anxiously next to one of the soldier’s guns, before wrapping his hand around the trigger. Teeth grinding together hard enough to crack a molar, repeating his initial question…
 “What. The. Fuck. Did you guys do?” Gritted through clenched teeth as he paced the gun between the three men standing in the lobby. Not even remotely concerned that he was outnumbered because they all looked petrified...as they should….clearly patience was the very last thing he had tonight. 
“Ugh, nothing we-” Click….there goes the sound of the safety, all of three words and a staggered pause in….
Hoseok’s stance never faltered, eyes blazing into the youngers with such intensity it took everything in him not to divert his gaze away from his superior. Head cocked to the side, jaw clenched painfully tight, you can actually visibly see it twitch. The slight arch in his brow let the guard know that was the wrong damn answer and this wasn’t multiple choice, it’s fill in the blank! So he’s got about one more try before this gun goes off, and suddenly you lot will have yourselves a red accent wall! 
“Hoseok, I swear we really-” Coyly swaying from behind the desk, edging his way closer and closer, to the dumbass that still hasn’t figured out how to properly answer the question. Connecting the gun to the side of his head, shoving the lackey against the wall in the process, there was an oddly calming aura radiating off his body right now. Which was clearly in strong contrast to what was currently taking place...and that’s because this..isn’t new to him anymore. The act of taking one’s life doesn’t weigh on his heart the way it used to and maybe that makes him a monster or..maybe it makes him damn good at his job. 
This was simple honestly, if they're not the reason for said breakdown then tell him what is. Not excuses as to why it wasn’t them because clearly that won’t get him any damn where now will it?
“Fuck-...she-she went and saw her dad!” Bingo! He all about choked on that…
 “ ...and she’s been like that ever since...I swear! I swear!” Hands above either side of his head,  shaking like a leaf in the wind, Hosoek could practically see his Adam’s apple bobbing against this throat, as he backed away. 
The shift within the air was palpable, they could’ve gotten whiplash from how quickly his eyes inverted, from pure rage to pain and concern. Shoulders slouched in on themselves as he released a shaky breath from his lungs, staggering backward as he ruffled his fingers through his jet black locks. Almost appearing somewhat winded by the update that he already kinda braced himself for honestly. 
“Fuck”  The word hushed from his lips so faint he doubts any of the men even heard him. Eyes fluttering shut briefly, his opposite hand rested on the bridge of his nose. Squeezing unnecessarily, tight, intentionally re-inflicting the pain he felt maneuvering through his chest!  It wasn’t even a full 30 seconds before he heard something else shatter into pieces, instantly snapping him back to reality, forcing him to reroute his thoughts. 
“How long…” There was a sudden dryness laced within his delivery as if he really didn’t want to know the answer.
“About a hour...or so….” 
“And I’m assuming she insisted on going alone?” No even bothering to make eye contact as a hushed “Yes..” fell from the guards lips. A low hum rang in the back of his throat while his eyes outlined the patterns within the marble, silently trying to pull his shit together before he made his next request….
“Override the security, and buzz me in….” The guards couldn’t help but feel a little shell shocked at how, monotoned, and emotionless his delivery was. One minute they could feel every once of his frustration without Hoseok even opening his mouth! Suddenly, it was like he’d completely removed himself from the entire conversation. Initially, his lack of patience steamed from other bullshit but now, none of that mattered, Germany, the drug deal, none of that even scratched the surface, all that matters right now is you. 
“Boss I don’t thin-”
Gaze slowly rising from the desk, cold, and somewhat feral, not quite sure why he’s being questioned, but right now, but it's definitely not the time! Bringing his nine back level with the guard in question, Hoseok didn’t have to say anything, his middle finger caressing the trigger said it all, expression blank. Gaze daring him to do anything but, buzz his superior in as he asked..nothing more, nothing less. 
Within seconds the center wall which at first glance just looked like a block of white Statuario marble started to shift, exposing all the shattered pieces of decor on the ground. Not even attempting to warn you first because he knew you’d tell him to leave. So instead, he took a deep breath, dropped the gun back onto the desk, cracked his neck a couple times, braced himself, and stepped inside. 
_________________________________________________________
Ya know, if circumstances were different the site in front of him could actually be somewhat comical. You, standing in the middle of this obnoxiously large gilded office, all dolled up in your heels, tight little LBD, dawning every curve on your body. A wrist full of Cartier and Bvlgari,hair curled...looking like you’re ready for a night on the town. Yet, instead of sitting in the middle of some 5-star restaurant drinking aged Scotch your in here. Angry, winded and breaking shit...really expensive shit at that! 
However, there was nothing even remotely humorous in regards to the reason behind your sudden rage. Honestly, it broke his heart to see you like this! Yes, the heart that most barely believed he truly had, but that’s neither here nor there, the people that matter know it threw and threw. Hoseok could feel the anger radiating off your skin even from where he stood. You were ablaze, nothing but utter rage, doused from your pores, but what made it even worse was the blatant desperation underneath it all. 
Every scream just seemed more and more broken...sure maybe he’s a hypocrite, he breaks shit all the time when he’s angry, hell people and objects included.  But you....this wasn’t you..and this wasn’t a healthy way for you to cope! To be real the only reason he stood there so long was because he needed a second to pull his shit together! The longer he stared at you the more his chest tightened, eyes burned like hell. His fingers twitched at his side trying to resist the urge to just come grab you, but he knew better. 
Sure, in most people's eyes, and by most I mean 99.9% of the population, you’d be the farthest thing from an angel! You lost any ounce of purity yearsss ago, still, in his eyes..there’s no one more untainted then you where it counts! And that’s, all that mattered because he knows better than anyone that you have a heart made of 24kt gold. A heart that needed to be protected at all cost, and clearly at the moment that’s not happening, because he can see it! Shattering all over the place along with very pricy china! 
Chest rising and falling painfully hard against itself, you were damn near blacked out in rage. So much so you didn’t even notice your office doors opening or closing. You, the woman that trained her ear to hear the faint hum of an elevator in an upscale hotel. 
Leaning down until your face was flush with the desk, gripping the edges so hard Hoseok could hear the floor creak. He couldn’t help but notice how flushed your knuckles looked, bouquets of bruises already blooming along the smooth surface. The moment of silence only lingered about….half a second, just long enough for you to recharge and grab something else to hurl at the wall. Voice-breaking before the hiss even fully rolled off your tongue, and that  “Something” was a set of Tiffany’s champagne glasses that you utterly adored! Well aware that wouldn’t go over well once this was all said and done so he figured that was his cue. 
“Y/n…” His voice wasn’t loud enough, abrasive enough, and frankly, you were far too absorbed to even hear him on such a neutering level! Sooo, he tried again. Slipping seamlessly into his…”Boss man”  tenor if you will, adding a dash of base to his voice that you could not only hear..but feel! 
”Baby!”
You startled upon hearing the endearment, head snapping around, body staggering until you fell back onto the corner of the desk. Bracing yourself with one arm, so you didn’t actually fall, chest heaving in short staggered breaths, as you gazed back at him, though it was clear initially you really weren’t looking at him.  
“Don’t!” He could see your body starting to curl in on itself as you shifted under his gaze which currently felt like an uncapped bulb in the middle of an integration room. The warning was too half hearted for him to even acknowledge!!
“Fuckkk''  Cursed from your lips only loud enough for you to hear once you gazed up at the clock through swollen eyes, not even realizing how late it was. Far too consumed in anger to remember that Hosoek was even coming home tonight, infuriating yourself even more because this was the last thing you wanted him to walk in on.  You didn’t want to burden him with the task of having to put you back together again, you’d been doing it just fine yourself for the past 5 or so days since this has secretly become routine as of late! You cry, you break shit, you touch up your makeup, and then you walk out of your office like nothing happened and continue running this 9 figure empire.
 “Just-go-go, back outside….” You were trying to sound strong, determined like you weren’t falling apart, and you were failing...miserably failing, you weren’t in control you were practically begging. The concern in Hoseok’s eyes was more than evident and that made shit even worse. Yet no matter how bad his palms were aching to touch you, he didn’t dare to reach for you yet, he knew your limits, and right now still wasn’t it…He could physically see you shudder as if it  wasn’t a solid 75 degrees outside right now.
The silence was too much, way too much, it felt as though it was ripping you apart, or maybe you were ripping yourself apart? Maybe it’s just harder to hide from yourself when you no longer can drown out your thoughts with the sound of you screaming and breaking shit…
“Fuck, this is about Germany right? Or Amsterdam? Whatever it is, whatever you need from me. You can have it...we can talk I promise, but right now,  I need you to leave…” Trying your damnedest to hold is gaze but it felt impossible because you knew he saw straight through you!
The pause was long enough for him to say something and still...nothing...it was like he was trying to push you enough to finally admit what you really needed from him.
“I just need a minute...t-to pull my shit together and then I’ll be fine, then we can talk.” You were practically whispering, your voice was so trashed and distressed. Forcing yourself to drop an octave, removing any texture from your tone  in order to properly “convey” your message yet he still didn't budge! 
“Hoseok, don’t make me ask again...just-” Shoeing your hand towards the door to replace the word you couldn’t quite get to roll off your tongue. 
Everything about you was contradictory because now you wanted him, your eyes were pleading in agony for him to hold you and make everything disappear. Yet, your tone was dry, removed, as if he was some low-level soldier on the totem pole, not to mention you legit just told him to leave. But oh how your emotions betray you when it comes to Mr. Jung! No matter how much bullshit you just spit out, you really only said one thing...and he heard it clear as day. 
Hoseok already knows, he knows you like the inside of a VP9 Veterinary pistol, no matter how cold your delivery was it didn’t stop him from easing off the wall and invading your space. You could feel him before he even got in within 10 ft of you, his aura already starting to infiltrate your little bubble! His stride was slow, confident, making up for all the things you currently lacked because that’s what a good partner does! 
He could see how hard you were clinging to the table as if you were using that to ground you, afraid of how lost you’d get once he got in arm’s length. This man had a soul that outweighed yours by miles and that was one of your favorite things about him, how deep he could go in more ways than one.  Hoseok didn’t stop until he was standing directly in front of you, close enough for you to taste the speirment on his tongue. Still, he hasn’t touched you and now you really needed him to touch you! The sweet musky scent of his cologne filling your lungs, you could practically feel the heat radiating off his body, god why weren’t the two of you in bed right now? Not even having sex nesicarilly,  just naked, skin on skin...you just wanted to feel him. It’s actually disgusting, the amount of control he has over your entire sense of being at this point. The way even just the slightest touch can completely throw all of your senses out of whack or back in whack I guess I should say.  
“Hmmm, a minute is all you need yeah….” Not even attempting to phrase it as a question because he knew it was all bullshit anyway!  So you didn’t dare respond, not trusting your voice anyway, just keeping your eyes trained on his...getting lost in how bright they looked in contrast to yours. Spreading your legs on instinct so he could get even closer, shifting slightly on top of the desk. 
Hands braced on either side of your frame to give him leverage as he tilted forward. “Well, it seems as though you’ve had….many minutes, hours even..” Eyes wandering around the room observing the mess you’d made, yeah the maids gonna need a bonus after this!  
“It doesn’t appear you having time alone has done you much good so try again baby…”Hoseok had a tenor that was meant for your ears, and your ears only. The typical bright almost giddy little accent to his tone was always replaced by a calmer, warmer one. An underlying element of sensuality that exuded just the right amount of calculated…. control….an effortless sense of dominance if you will.
Staring down at you through hooded lids thoroughly, reading for any ounce of discomfort! Once he didn’t find any... finally, you felt his hands take a firm grip on your waist. Your body tensed initially, hoping to counteract how hard you were still shaking! Hint, you failed, you were practically vibrating against him at initial contact!
“Breathe y/n...” 
“I am, trust me that’s the only thing I can do right now…” There was still a slight bite rolling off your tongue, no matter how winded you sound. However, in Hoseok’s eyes sass is better than silence so carry on! 
Nosing along the side of your neck, right beneath your ear, next to your windpipe, letting him feel how you truly felt, which was unbalanced and a little lost. Your heart rate per 15 seconds was probably double what it was on an average day and yes, Hoseok knows how many times your heart beats per minute on an average day! 
“Baby...” Cooed from his lips almost sympathetically as he slowly started painting a trail down the side of your neck with his lips. 
“Hoseok, I-god-I can’t-” You “can’t “what exactly?  Relax? Give in? Shut your brain off? What “Can't” you do? 
“Yeah, yeah, you can, let me turn shut your brain off for a minute , let me take care of you.” Hands gently ravishing your body, effortlessly sending goosebumps down your spine with every feather-like touch. 
“I’ll give you any, and everything you want, but I won’t leave you alone right now…” The words fanned against your skin making your shiver against him, no matter how calm his tenor was the dominance was clear as day! You didn’t have a say in the matter….
Reclining your neck on instinct giving him more room to work as you tried to clear your mind of any and everything that wasn’t Hoseok as you let your eyes fan shut. 
“Hoseok…” Staggered out heavily feeling like you were choking and he only offering a hum in response, not letting up from his current mestractions….”Fuck, yeah, okay just- just keep touching me...please” You weren’t typically a beggar even in bed but right now you needed him, not int he mood to be sassy or play hard to get, to be honest, you just didn’t have the energy. 
“I’m not going anywhere baby..I’m right here..all here for you..always…in any way you need me…” Palms soothing down your thighs, reaching under to smoothly wrap them around his waist, bringing his hips flush to yours. Once he felt you secure your ankles he reached for your hands, kissing along your knuckles before sliding them under the back of his shirt. Knowing how skinship puts your mind at ease, and the second the pads of your fingers graze his skin...you’re already finding  yourself digging your nails into his shoulders. Ripping a low growl from his throat, as he rocked his hips forward, re-positioning his arms on either side of your body so his forehead was flush to yours. 
“All here for you, in any way you need me..” That seems to hold a lot more weight as of late and no matter how much you’re trying to rid your mind of those thoughts..you can’t, you fucking can’t. Suddenly you’re clawing at his shoulders for a different reason, and it hurts, and not the fun kinda pain either…he hears a faint whimper leave your lips, as you clung to him even tighter.
“Y/n….” He exhales, voice shaking eyes glazed over, welting full of tears he’s praying don’t fall because he needs to be strong for you right now. “Baby” There was a blatant plea laced within that and you...
“I know, I know…” it’s unsaid...though it’s clearly not unsaid because you know...youuuu know, the two of you avoided that word. Maybe because if you said it that makes the idea of losing each other even worse. So for now, you’d just prefer to endlessly show it…....
Talking would just suck ass right now, so you opted for the later and leaned in, it wasn’t soft or delicate..you kissed him hard. Until he was gasping through his nose to breathe while, almost stifling forward,letting your hands wander up his shirt to thread into his hair.  Tugging at his scalp until you heard him moan against your tongue, taking that as your invitation to lick your way into his mouth which he accepts willingly. Reclining his jaw letting you have control because he figured you could probably use that right now.  Your lips moved with such emotion, and just pure passion that you don’t know if you’d ever felt so weak under him..yet powerful all at the same damn time! You almost feel lightheaded, the more you kiss, tongues meeting with such desperation your chest feels like it’s burning. Teeth clashing, nails clawing so hard into Hosoek’s skin it hurts but he doesn’t give a damn.
You tilt your head back giving him free access to do as he pleases and he bites. Hard. Until he rips a moan right off your tongue and it sounds so damn good….Nipping licking and sucking over every inch of skin he can reach. Feenin to hear you moan over and over again...until your lips find his and your clawing at his v-neck for dear life. Yanking at the neckline until you hear it rip, lifting and tugging it until he finally takes the hint….
“Offff” 
“Come take what you want.” Pulling back to allow you to yank it over his head, exposing mounds of warm and toned honey-coated skin, covered in trails of articulately placed ink. A combination of new-aged back and white with hints of watercolor paint his skin, telling an array of stories that you know like the back of your hand at this point!
Tugging him back by the nape of his neck so his chest is flush to yours, the warmth radiating through the fabric of your dress, which didn’t cover much, to begin with. Rolling your hips up into his for slight friction until your moaning back against his tongue again, hands moving down to help you grind at a steady rhythm. The contrast of the rough material of his jeans, against your clit was really fucking you up right now.  
“Hoseok…”
“Baby” He countered in a way that had your curls trying to curl under the pad of your heels! 
“Fuck, Fuck me,” You whispered against his lips intentionally whiney, and he froze instantly, not that he didn’t want to because fuck he wanted to he just...Hoseok’s big on talking shit out. Not one for hiding or aiding emotions, and clearly there’s something wrong here!
“I really,need you right now”  You whisper again, nipping at his bottom lip and now it’s hopeless because this man knows he can’t deny you a damn thing. He hasn’t been able too since the two of you met in Paris, initially as strangers stood on a roof with your Colt Pistols aiming dead in each other’s faces.
You could feel the frustration growling from his throat but still, he kissed you deeper, harder, rocking you against the desk so your laying on your back. Rolling his hips against you slowly just to hear you moan against his tongue. ‘Hoseok!” Yeah, your whiny, and yeah your inpatient…
‘God, the shit you do to me…” Leaning in to steal your breath away with another deep brusing kiss.There was a hint of frustration and disbelief, lingering within that, and you can’t help but smile up at him, soothing your palms down the smooth planes of his chest. Nails idly outlining the array of cherry blossoms painting his skin, framing his collarbone perfectly. Not even trying to hide how much you loved knowing you had the same effect on him, which in laymen’s terms just means your both helplessly and endlessly whipped! 
Being in this deep, with someone within your world is dangerous, even more so when they’re actually in the field,  not hauled up in a castle, like some modern-day Repunzel. It can make you vulnerable, irrational, hypersensitive, but on the flip side, it can also turn you into the most lethal version of yourself where enemies are concerned. Your need to ensure no one stands in the way of whatever you deem your “Happy Ending” to be, becomes insatiable...you’d set cities ablaze for that man and he’d do the same..in a heartbeat! 
Considering that’s the first, and only smile he’s seen from you in days he can’t help but lean down again. Leaving one more lingering kiss against your lips sighing out in content at how laxed and pliant you feel under him, you already know he’s smiling, you can feel Hoseok's teeth against your lips. Tentatively he untangles himself, not before leaning down a good three or four more times to kiss you again. As if he's going far, hell as if your ass was going any damn where to begin with even if he was. 
Smoothing his hands up your thighs, hiking your dress around your waist in the process, hissing at the fact you opted against panties today. The minute he eased your legs apart not only could he smell how much you need him but he could see...the need dripping from your lips. Wiggling your hips a little, as your arched even further onto the oversized glass desk, shoving the mounds of files to the side, your heels gave you the perfect angle to completely spread out. Putting yourself on full display, the slight elevation on your lower half had your hips tipping slightly forward, giving him  access to everything he needed! Your gaze was far  too innocent for his liking as you batted your lashes in his direction. Easing your hands up your body.. taking a little detour to caress your breast in your hands before letting them get lost in your hair. 
An all-knowing smirk playing on your lips as you watch his eyes slowly unravel every inch of your body. If you didn’t know any better you’d think his mouth was watering, stealth fingers digging into your skin hard enough to leave a mark. Dropping to his knees..
“I don’t-”
“I know, I know”  Leaning forward until his lips were flush with your inner thigh, eyes trained on yours daring you to look away, jerking slightly when he bit you, then a low moan fell off your lips as he sucked on the spot. 
“You sound so fuckin good” Slurred against your skin, teeth sinking into your thigh even harder this time leaving a larger bite mark. Not pulling back until you squirmed from under him, his name husking off your tongue. 
What you meant earlier was you didn't want him to fully prep you tonight, you wanted the pain, the feeling of him stretching you open around his cock instead of his fingers. The delicious burn that almost makes you feel like your on the brink being split open! But I mean, fuck, look at you, he can’t just..not taste you, right? I mean no he HAS to taste you…
Resting his head against your inner thigh, thumbs kneading your skin while he started to kiss  his way around your bikini line. There seems to be no rush and at the moment you were just enjoying the warmth ghosting off his lips so you laid there content. Then, he leaned forward, placing his lips flush against your clit, leaving an array of solid lingering kisses all the way up your lips. And yeah they were somewhat chaste at this point,but you were feeling real needy  right now so even that had you squirming beneath him. 
“Hoseok” Sighed from your lips as you felt goosebumps spread through your body, gently massaging your nipples through your dress, somewhat teasing yourself instead of giving direct contact. Just allowing your touch to ghost over, until you’re arching into your own hand, pinching even tighter but still not giving your body the full sensation . 
“Y/n” Hoseok replied, calm as ever, a smirk playing on his lips as he watched you “God, your so damn sexy…” Slowly his tongue fell from his lips and landed right around your clit, sucking it into his mouth with a moan that shot through every cell in your body. He sucked, and slurped you between his lips so hard, and you damn near smothered him with your thighs on accident. Your body's first instinct was to pull away, there was so much pressure and stimulation being applied to literally the most sensitive region of your body. And it was steady, once he had you wrapped around your tongue that's where you stayed.
“Holy shit-babyyy” Eyes squeezing shut, trying to remember how to breathe!
 Your mind and body weren’t on the same page, thighs practically vibrating on either side of his head and the minute he felt your legs close in, he nipped the skin between his teeth.Forcing you to arch up and away instead of clamping down, a broken cry of his name falling off your tongue as you tried to desperly keep your legs apart. 
He knew you needed a distraction, leaning forward, grabbing your hand and burying it into your hair, making sure you had an almost painfully tight grip on his scalp! You were damn thankful because holding him like this gave you some sense of ground, instead of you feeling like your about to plummet through the glass.
Hoseok always touched you like he wanted too, like he was the one getting off which prompted your next question once the air resurfaced to your lungs. 
“Mmm, fuck your hard for me already aren’t you? Just tasting me get’s my baby hard doesn't it?” You knew the answer but damn if it didn’t feel good to hear him moan it out anyway.
Nipping at your thigh again, this time a little harder “You fuckin, known, what you do to me, I could come right now if I didnt need to feel you come all over my cock” You moaned so loud at that, gripping his scalp even tighter. “That’s it baby, keep me where you want me.” So you did just that. Pushing his head down so he had nowhere to go but your clit, however the smirk you could feel resting against your thigh should've warned you that he was about to rip you apart.
Hoseok circled his tongue around the very tip, meriscally, his strokes were deep and languid, and they ripped you apart. There's no other way to describe the way he’s volleying your pussy around his tongue, right now! The only comparison I can give you is he’s kissing your clit, and every crevice between your lips, as if he was thoroughly exploring every inch of your mouth . He was loud, and messy, in his pleasure where your concerned, the almost primal sound of his lips, and spit smacking against your folds. Low, needy moans vibrating against your skin as if you were the best damn thing he’d tasted all day. Pulling back to spit directly on your entrance, pursing his lips, and blowing , directing it to fall straight in and your body clenched hard. Fuck you needed, him to inside you…. nuzzling his face between your thighs until his nose was flush with your clit. He knew better than to work you open with his fingers so he opted for his tongue. Picking his own lubricate back up with the tip of his tongue and swirling it around the entrance. Moaning at the wall your body naturally started clenching around the muscle. You were a moaning mess beanthe him, hips rocking against his face.
You’re getting antsy now, wiggling your hips harder, you felt like you were close from this alone and that;s not what you wanted “Fuck Hoseok, baby just fuck me…”  Yanking his head until he pulled away, dragging his lips down to meet yours, chin glistening with all traces of you. The kiss was hard, messy,your essence was all you could taste against his tongue, moaning out as he rocked his hips into you. Leaning forward so he could reach into the Hermes gift box which was kinda decoration kinda used to store lube and other shit you really should have in an office! 
The minute he grabbed the bottle you ripped it from his hands, this was the least you could do,plus you just loved how heavy he felt in your palm. Hoseok almost growled as he deepened the kiss, more teeth and tongue than finesse,the kiss is hard, it feels like your both gasping for air the entire time but neither of you want to pull apart. Pulling at his belt with nothing but a whine until he gets the hint and smacks your hand out of the way, within seconds you feel him hit your stomach. Hot, hard, and heavy, and god if you didn't clench so damn hard, he’s literally twitching  on top of you right now.
“Do you even have the slightest idea how fucked up I am for you?  How hard I am and you havent even touched me yet?” 
“Mmm, I don’t know baby it’s been a minute since I’ve seen you...” Your whispers seductive yet taunting,kissing at his jaw and his neck, smiling against his skin at the low moans that spill from his lips. “Tell me..
Digging your heels into his back as you uncapped the bottle, taking an obscene amount in your hand before reaching between your bodies. Ripping a shaky moan from Hoseok's throat once you laced your fingers around his cock. Squeezing just enough to let all the acces lube drizzle down his shaft and land on his balls, he’s just throbbing in your palm right now and your not even moving yet. “Does it make you feel good to know you got me wrapped around your finger? Knowing- I’d- fuck-” Now, your moving,  hand working his shaft, flucuating the way you distribute pressure, loosser at the bottom and tighter twoards the head  becuse thats his sweet spot. Lube just running down your fingers, it’s so damn messy and you love it,he's straight up whining into your mouth right now. Breath fanning against your face as he nuzzles into your skin...lips parted.
“Knowing that you’d what baby?”  Tugging his bottom lip between your teeth, feeling the way his hips twitched above you , so you slow down your pace, and tighten your grip. Hoseok's brows are furrowed chest flushed…..he looks fucking beautiful.
“That I’d kill anyone in a heartbeat for you, that i’d never let a damn thing happen to you” He can't help but rock into your fist even harder, eyes struggling to stay focused but he refuses not to look at you.. “Does that get to you the same way it does me? Because I still get hard thinking about the way you went toe to toe with Jin’s father about me that night in Italy.” Trailing his tongue down the side of your jaw nibbling ever so slightly “That,was-fuck-the sexiest thing I’d ever seen.”
“God, I-...” Licking your way back into his mouth as you continued working him in your hand, moving your thumb over his tip, smearing the mounds of precum into the excessive lube .“Yeah, fuck yeah, it turns me on wayy more than it should. I shouldn't want you to be reckless when it comes to me but god if it's not sexy as all hell knowing you would be…” 
“And I would” he responds with zero Hesitation….
The sudden passion somewhat catches you off guard honestly, and the fire burning through his eyes as he said that is….stifling to say the least. 
“You’d go to war with me baby?” You didn't intend to shift the mood this heavy, yet you couldn't help the way it just vomited off your tongue. Maybe it’s your subconscious talking right now, still trying to fight it’s way through regardless of your current surroundings! 
Reaching up to cup your jaw, tilting your chin upwards, placing the most fragile kiss along your lips . “With you, for you, anyway you spin it the answer is yes...a hundred times over baby it’s yes…” The ache you currently felt coursing through your veins for this man right now...
“I need you in me. Now. I promise will go slow...please let me do this” 
Hoseok held your gaze for a moment before responding, searching your eyes for any hesitation “‘And you’ll tell me if it’s too much..” Grip firm around your waist, not even bothering to phrase it as a question because it wasn’t one...
‘Promise…” Placing the tip right at your entrance,and Hoseok can feel your heat trying to pull him in but he retreats. Giving you full control, keeping your eyes trained on his, well aware that’s what he needed to make sure, he could gauge our pain whether you wanted to admit it or not. Initially, nothing happened neither of you moved, just the faint suction of your very neglected pussy trying to suck him in.
 “I said I wanted you to fuck me...you know my body better than I do..make me take you…” 
‘I-” Yeah. Hoseok.Exe stopped working because he definitely wasn't expecting that, thinking you’d just rock yourself down, not that you wanted him to gauge your restience! Nails raking down his back as you roll your hips against him, making sure he can feel how warm and wet you are, how ready you are..positioning your lips to moan right against his ear.
“Fucking come’re” Hosoek leans forward smashing his lips against yours so hard it hurts, grabbing your legs, bracing them on either side of his shoulders. Sliding your hips forward until the backs of your thighs are flush with his chest, and your red bottoms are facing the ceiling. Gripping his length, teasing the head up and down your folds, as he left a trail of open wet mouthed kisses down your jaw,behind your ear, over to your neck. Ending with his lips nuzzled against your ear…returning the gesture “Missed you, touching you,” Exensuating each word with a kiss “The sound of your voice, waking up to you, being inside you...” Rocking his hips against yours deep, and hard.
You can’t even help but moan at just the mention of him being inside again after what feels like months “Want you, need you....” You’re in rare form tonight, yeah, your always a little submissive with him but not to this extent. 
“Your really tryin to break me today huh?” Tugging your lobe between his teeth before suctioning his lips around your jaw, at this angle Hoseok had the fronts of your thighs colliding with your chest. If he even considers  bringing you back this deep once he’s in you...it’s game over…”You ready?” 
“God yes” Soothing your hands up his stomach once he pulled back, skin hot to the touch and initially nothing happens, just the pressure of Hoseok's tip. Wiggling your hips playfully gives him a little incentive, so he starts to rock forward, and suddenly play times over! Your body freezes dead in its tracks...Hoseok's eyes stay trained on yours the entire time and your jaw clenches at the exact moment your pussy clamps down around his tip. As if you're trying to reroute the pressure elsewhere…A slight whine spills form your lips which lets him know there is still some pleasure laced within all of this.
‘Touch me, keep touching me baby….” Somehow Hoseok appears to be offensively calm regardless of the vice like grip you currently have around him! The request was more for you than him, knowing how much you needed his warmth right now! Clearly your not even close to being settled enough for him to come down flush level yet. So, this will have to do,taking your hands in his, guiding them down his body leisurely. Leading your fingers on a little field trip, sighing contently once you feel how warm and toned he is, how strongly his body reacts to your touch. The way every muscle twitches as you ghost over it, leaving a trail of goosebumps in its wake. Subconsciously you found yourself leaning towards his touch, hissing out once you shifted a little too much for the moment.
“You still with me baby?” 
Nodding slowly as you try to focus, steading your breathing as much as possible, you wanted, no, needed to feel him like this! He can see the pain coursing through your body as the two of you still hold each other's gaze, which is the only thing keeping you grounded right now. Resting his head against your inner thigh, kissing along your skin once he feels his tip breach your quivering entrance. And it’s tight , fuck it’s tight, your body feels like it’s buring from the inside out once you swollow the swell of his head between your lips. Your jaw slacks open and nothing comes out, he’s not even sure if your breathing right now but what he does know is your eyes are still open and focused on Hoseok. 
“Goddamn” Hoseok groans deep and low head lulling back and finally he sounds just as fucked up as you,hand taking a bruisingly hard grip on your hips. He’s actually trying to shift back a little, so he can rock back in, but he can’t. You won’t let him go,“You gotta-shit, you gotta  let me breathe a little baby….fuck” He’s winded and using every once of self control he has to stay stationary, even though your applying a dangerous amout of pressure to the most sesentive regin of this mans shaft. The tip, that's all that's suctioned between your heat and your squeezing him like your trying to break him, and there isn't a damn thing you can do about it.  
 So you try, fuck you try, exhaling then inhaling then exhaling again, attempting to get all your msucles to relax. Only problem is your not even clenching around Hoseok’s cock, you just have him trapped. Your just clamped tight, so tight it hurts, on both ends! He can feel your thighs shaking around him, pulling inwards as if your bodies trying to curl in on itself , and he knows this isn't going to work! He’s hissing hard too, nails digging into the swell of your ass, and thankfully once the two of you make eye contact yours are daggering into him with a silent plea. And he already knows what you want! The real issue is there’s way too much swirling around your head mentally for you to have full control over your senses right now. So, that's when you render him full control of any and every inch of your being to do as he pleases in order to give you what you need.
“Ho-Seok...fuck just-” 
 Reaching out for one of your hands so you can squeeze his as hard as you need, kissing along your knuckles.”Yeah?” 
“Yeah!” Tilting your head back with a beathy whine, squeezing his fingers even tighter….
 “You trust me?” Nodding without hesitation “I need you, to keep your eyes open, and focus, can you do that for me baby? ”  It’s a lot but Hoseok knows your limits and if it was truly too much he’d pull out, you can take it, all of it. Shifting your thighs so there now wrapped around his waist as opposed to above his head.  Pouring an obscene amount of lube on the remainder of his shaft, not even bothering to rub it in, just letting the excess drip onto the table. 
“And if you can’t get your colors out?” 
“Pinch you...I’m good, I know you got me...”A lazy smile tugging on your lips as you just try to stay calm.
“On the count of three, take a deep slow breath through your nose...and don't exhale until I tell you too” Hoseok cups your cheek and you nuzzle into it, kissing the tips of his fingers, you can feel them trembling though he’s trying to appear at ease.. 
“K” Yes wide, but focused, determined...a  little stubborn but hell you've already started right? 
Hoseok's eyes flutter shut briefly, taking in a deep slow breath of his own, making sure he’s in the right headspace to guide you through this. Once those big brown eyes of his creek open and your gazes meet again it’s heavy. Hosoek’s eyes are blown out, half lided, already glazed over, he just looks like sex...and he looks like hes about to break you in all the right ways! 
Adjusting his grip on your hip, steadying himself, thumbing at your side, “Count with me….1” God, the textures in this man's voice where unreal, he just sounds so damn smooth, the hushed command had so much control, and warmth wrapped up in all of 4 words.
He rocks forward, barely...just to see if you’ve loosened up and you still haven’t budged... Flicking his chin in your direction indicating he wanted you to continue…
“Two…” You’d be lying if you aid your heart wasn;t hammering in your ears as you let a deep breath start to fill your lungs.
“Three” Whispped through clenched teeth and he didn’t hesitate, rocking back just a little so he has better leverage tilting his hips upwards and he watches your eyes widen..thighs tense but he doesn't stop. Redirecting all of his weight into his abdomen, grinding down with a deep, heavy roll of the hips, you can feel every muscle in his back within this first thrust. Your fingers twitch in his hold, eyes glazing over relatively quickly, but your still looking at him, barely but you are. Even Hoseok’s breathing a little shaky, brows furrowed, but he's in, his tips fully past your entrance “Let it out baby….” 
And you do, whimpering hard, as a choked out breath hippicus through your chest, initially you were expecting him to pause. Give you a minute to adjust to the initial stretch…..Nope…
He doesn't stop, he's still rolling forward and now your gasping and whimpering all over again, even louder this time! Hoseok’s thumbs bruising the hell out of your hips but you don’t have him stop, you can’t! Your mind and body needs this right now, the tension the burn,all of it! 
“That’s it…” Even though his restricted breathing you can hear the fondness dripping off his tongue. “ Focus on me, I got you” The more he breaches his way through your heat the more the wind gets knocked out of your lungs but it’s good, it’s soo damn good! You manage to somewhat choke out his name and he just hums in response, biting down on his bottom lip in concentration. Untangling his hand from yours to brace both on either side of his head. Hoseoks pushing through steadily now,morphing his way through your heat that’s still trying to fight against him but he doesn't stop.No matter how hard you pulsing around him, Hoseok's shaft drags forward until his balls meet the swell of your asss. And finally he’s right on top of you, your bodies trembling beneath him so he gently lowers himself. Bringing his chest flush to yours letting your wrap your arms around his neck. Clawing your way down his back, intentionally releasing some of the tensions coursing through your veins. Licking his way back into your mouth, kissing deep, and messy until your light headed and desperate. Endless Moans richoching against one other, his palms soothing down your thighs. 
Everything pauses for a while, neither of you move, your both panting hard into each other's mouths while you adjust and Hoseok's not rushing you either. Wanting you to relax a little so he doesn't come after all of 2 strokes, idily  tracing patterns against your skin. Finally able to feel your breathing even out, muscles becoming more laxed beneath him!
“You ready for me baby?,”
All you can do is moan in response, still so overwhelmed, squeezing your legs around his waist as hard as you could so he at least knows your still with him. 
So he does, pulling out and pushing back in, and your eyes automatically roll back at the feeling. It’s still tight as fuck but he’s somehow managing to weave his way through. .
“Hurts?”  He can’t help but ask since your thighs are still shaking a little, and you nod honestly.
“Good pain? Good enough to make my pretty baby come?” More of a statement than a question, you can hear the smirk in his voice, as he kissed down your jaw. Trying to distract you a little,sucking a couple bruises along the front of your neck . Edging his way back and forth building up a steady tempo, and finally Hoseok can feel the shift. He’s able to breathe within you a little better, your letting him wade in a little deeper! 
You exhale shakily and nod again, feeling him shift off of you, repositioning your legs on either side of his shoulders.Leaning forward pressing all his weight into his arms until your thighs are flush to your chest. 
Your mouth opens and closes, kinda like a fish outta water, you do it a few times but not shit comes out.
“Baby…” Kissing up your inner thigh as he gently rocks forward , slowing down a little so you can feel the slow drag of his cock pull you apart. Back arching ever so lightly, moaning out low and wanton “Your so, sexy, doin so good for me” Nuzzling against your skin, nipping lightly at your inner thigh. 
“Your deep” The word barley leaves your tongue “Fuck, faster..”
“Yeah?”
Before you can even respond he snaps his hips forward and you almost scream, nails digging into his disciples as he stares down at you with a smirk that’s..real concerning considering the position he has you in. So he does it again, pulling his cock halfway out and rocking forward, 
“That’s it, that’s what my baby needed,” Hoseok whispers and thrust forward even harder this time, rocking up on the heels balls of his feet as if he’s aiming for your damn ribcage. 
Your mouth falls back open, looking like you wanna moan but you can;t every exhale gets cut off by another deep roll of the hips,repositioning himself so he braced with one arm. Running the other up your face, into your hair, before cradilling your jaw, thumbing at your bottom lip which you nip and suck into your mouth. Humming out contently, as you lick a stipe up his index and middle finger, not missing the way Hoseok’s cock twitches at the added stimulation. 
“Look at you…..” Eyes trailing down your body agnoniziling slow, taking in each and every detail as if it’s the very first times he's ever seen you like this. And still, you can’t help but shutter at the genuine astonishment burning through those lust filled eyes of his. Which eventually land on the site that his is cock dissappring between your wet and swollen pussy, lips just sprawled over his balls just the way he likes “ My baby's so good for me hmm?
“Always…” you whisper eyes rolling back,,completely glazed over, as his fingers fallback from your lips, every inch of your skin feels like it’s on fire right now.
Hoseok gets lost for a minute, watching the way your so pliant and trusting with him, eyes squeezed shut just letting yourself get consumed by all things Hoseok! Pulling back just enough to spit directly on your clit. The texture has your eyes flying open the instantly rolling shut once he brings his thumb down to work the bud at a swift steady pace. 
“Fuckkkk” Whimpering loudly in repsonse “Don’t stop, fuck harder..” And that he does, harder faster every thrust has his balls smacking against your ass. “Fuck, yes! Fuck, you feel so good…” 
“Yeah, yeah...your right there...come on baby…” He can feel you pulsing even harder against him. Not that you ever fully stopped but the tensions different now, more constricted…..he starts thrusting home hard! Spitting an even bigger wad on your clit, mixing it with the extra lube dripping down his balls as he continues ripping your nerves wide open. 
“Fuck, kiss me!” Whiney and bossy as per usual!
Smacking his hand away, exchanging it for your own so you can drag him down and take what you need, placing  your index and middle finger straight to the clit, which was rock hard. Applying as much pressure as possible, until the friction almost burns. Feeling your release dangling right in front of your face.
“Fuck, I’m gonna come...” You whisper out  all of a sudden slowly rocking your hips forward trying to meet his thrust though it’s  kinda hard in this position. 
“Yeah? You gonna come all over my cock? Then let me fill you up until I’m dripping down your thighs...” The kiss is messy more tonuge and teetht han skill, he can feel you, your right fucking there, thrusting into so hard it almost hurts.
Your eyes widen, brows furrowing to the center of your face, breath shuttering in your throat, mouth just parted against his, then your eyes squeezed shut. Fingers still working your clit, and your coming, silent at first until your crying out, voice shattinger , nails dragging from the nape of hoseok's neck down his back! He dosen’t stop fucking you, not even for a second, going just as, and fast as he was before, while you whitherbenathe him. The second he feels you try and pull your hand away he drops his hips even lower, restricting any movements. 
“Don’t fucking stop! Keep coming until I do, I'm right there,ride this out with me baby” He all about growls at you, and you don’t even dare to disobey, to be honest you don’t wanna stop. Body almost working on autopilot to chase the buzz running through your body, running towards it as much as your trying to run away…it’s too much but it’s soo good!
He’s thrusting into you as hard as he can but fuck if his biceps aren’t on fire and he just can’t finish the way he wants...the way he needs. So he pulls out, fast, barley giving you time to whine nevertheless realize what's going on and he slides over next to you. Lying back on the desk and grabbing you within seconds, sinking you back down onto his cock in one swift notion. Nails digging into your hips as he fucks you down onto him, hard, short thrust rip through your body, not making you do a damn thing but try and hang on for the ride! Your gasping hard, tossing your head back once you reconnect your hand with your clit. Attempting to roll your hips down and meet the pace he’s set but it's merciless… and he’s picking up speed quickly. 
“jesus-fuck-Ho-oseok!” Your nails are raking into this man's chest so hard you wouldn't be surprised if you broke skin but he’s groaning deep and that’s only egging you on! 
His honey coated complexion’s just dripin, brows furrowed, eyes barley ajar, Hoseok seems to be returning the favor. His thumb is about a second away from leaving a permanent indentation and it hurts but you need it. Not even a question as to if you guards can hear you or not your loud! Voice trashed, and very swipe of the hand has you jerking and twitching above him because your clits sentive as all fuck, but goodamn if he dosen’t look good, forhead sweaty  jaw slacked. 
“Y/n, Y/n, fuckk” He’s whining high and needy, heats rashing over his body, and you feel his balls tighen against your ass, and now he turly is right there. You can feel him twitching hard inside you.
“Come onnn baby, you know I fuckin want it, you know I wanna be fu-” There’s a choked out tear rolling down your cheek your bodies spazing so damn hard, it’s painful. Before you can even make sense of what’s happening your crying, and your clenching and coming all over again, your bodies completely spent. Toppling on top of him, instantly because...what the hell just happened?? 
 You clamp down tight around his cock unintentionally, body just luid, and spasming above him and you both moan and that’s when he comes, hard. Eyes open, and locked with yours, a low goan of your name falling from his lips as he spills into you. Hoseok’s shaking beneath you but he doesn't even try to pull out, reaching up to gently brush the tears off your cheek. Taking your hand in his, and sucking those same two fingers into his mouth, eyes locked with your as he does so, and your too damn spent to even react properly. Slowly he still continues thrusting into you, leaning up to press a couple soft kisses against your lisp, humming contently as you taste yourself.  Adjusting his grip so he has one hand, caressing the back of your neck and the other wrapped around your waist. Rubbing slow soothing circles down your spine, as he cards his fingers through your hair, your chest heaving together in unison as your bodies slowly come down. 
“Hi” The words hush off your tongue with a lazy, and utterly exhausted smile, eyes too heavy to open until you feel his teeth pressing against your lips. Letting you know he's smiling too and I mean, fuck, who are yuo to declien a front row seat to to watch the sunrise!
“Hi baby…”  Leaning up to press another linger kiss against your lips as his hips to a halt, just letting you simmer around him. Even the slight stimulation was enough to have both of you moaning out in overstimulation...
________________________________________________________________
The comedown was always slow between the two of you so it’s not a surprise that your bodies and tongues stayed tangled together long after Hoseok came. Eventually, the desk got a little uncomfortable, Hoseok's damn near stuck to it ,there's so much heat radiating off his skin.  So he wraps you in his arms and plops the two of you down on the couch. All the while , his cocks still bured between your lips, your dress is still flipped over your ass and his jeans and hanging low against his thighs! 
“How you feelin?”Pressing delicate kisses all over your face, hands rubbing your inner thighs because he knew they were burning by now.
“Tired” You pouted, mumbling slightly...
“Well, I guess I did my job then huh?” A faint smirk tugging on his lips, as he kissed down your jaw….
Once the two of you settled on the couch Hoseok waits a moment, opting to see if you’d want him to pull out though he should’ve known better, the two of you fall asleep like this more times than not! Gently stroking his fingers down your back in hopes it would coax you into talking without him having to pry it out of you!  The longer you lot sat in silence the faster your heart rate got, Hoseok could actually hear it echoing throughout the room. Leaning down to press a flurry of kisses into your scalp trying to ease you in anyway he could. Eventually, the T-rex in the room was starting to feel a little suffocating sooo...
“He’s just not...doing well, like…. at all…” Tone flat, as if you were trying to remove yourself from the situation at hand. Purposely nuzzling into the side of his neck, bussing yourself with the chains dawning his collarbones. The lack of eye contact wasn’t because you were embarrassed it’s because you just really didn’t wanna cry. You came wayyyy too hard your body can’t handle shit else! 
“I know-I know we’ve known this for a while…” There was this really thick lump hammering in your throat that really didn’t want to leave, the stability within your tone was swiftly heading south. Hoseok could hear it too, no matter how muffled you sound, suddenly more kisses were being pressed into your scalp.
“I guess, I was just fucking naive because he was doing soooo damn good earlier in the year ya know? ” Eyes fluttering up to meet his tentatively, your lashes fanning his skin gave that away, and he gazed down instantly. A dry chuckle leaving your throat, shaking your head as if your the butt of your own joke, but didn’t find it funny nor did he find it naive. 
Holding you even tighter, if that was possible…Those big brown eyes of his were soft and so damn fond of you it was actually ridiculous. If only your enemies could see you now, two of the most notoriously cutthroat people in the industry, throwing googly eyes back and forth! Looking like a couple in some cheesy Netflix romcom! Leaning down to press a lingering kiss on your lips, not pulling back until you released the breath that apparently only he knew you were holding. 
 ”Listen to me baby, there’s nothing naive about being hopeful, there’s also no handbook on how to handle your father dying. Even if you know it’s coming sooner than later..doesn't make any of this shit easier...”
“I know but...fuck…” Shifting slightly so your sitting more upright arm propped on the cushion behind his shoulder. “It’s just a lot, because I feel like I can’t fully do my job because if I do, I’ll miss something. Maybe I’ll miss...it, I mean Germany for fuck’s sake! That’s totally something I’d typically go on..instead, I forced y-”
Leaning down to press his lips against yours again, hoping you’d get the hint “In case you forgot..I volunteered, you never asked...you didn’t have too. And my job, for the record, is whatever you need it to be!” There was nothing but fire blazing into your eyes right now, he needed you to feel that, that he’s here for whatever you need..whenever you need it...however you need it! 
“I know, Seok-baby I know, and I appreciate that more than you’ll ever know” Reaching out to cup his jaw, melting at the way he instantly nuzzled into your palm before giving it a kiss. 
“However, I’m suppose to be in charge, I’m suposed to be in control, and I’m not.. I’m already falling apart and he’s not even gone yet…” That sentence alone had you feeling like you wanted to throw up! “I mean can you fuckin imagine how much of a wreck I’m gonna be?” Hoseok could hear how agitated you were getting so he opted to just stay quiet until he was sure you were done talking…
“Seok, I’m going to fall a fucking part-” You tried to turn your head before the tear rolled down your cheek but you failed, voice breaking off before you could even continue your thought. Hastily whipping your face as if you were mad at yourself for being so emotional right now. Nails daggering into his but he didn’t pull away, he let you be, he’s felt way worse. 
“This empire, his, empire is going to fall, apart, and any legacy my family ever had will  go up in flames! And who’s fucking fault will that be!? Huh? Not my brothers, Nothing’s ever his fault, how the hell does that work out!?” Your voice was hammering so hard in your chest it almost sounds as though your speaking straight into an industrial fan!
“ The one who fucked up everything gets to just ease by like nothing ever happened! Cause lord knows he’s too too damn much of a junkie to even tie his fuckin shoes nevertheless run the family business! It’s not that I didn't want this, I just don’t think I’m ready...nobody asked me if I was ready, my own fuckin brother never even offered to help like-I-fuck!” 
And now your crying again, great, great…..your first instinct was to get up, get away, move, break more shit I don’t know! Just anything, but sitting in this man’s lap, those assassin reflexes though, Hoseok caught your thigh before you could completely ease off the couch. Shifting your weight again, helping you pull out, you were far too gone to even react to the slight sting you should’ve felt. Slamming you back down so your hips were flush against his pelvic bone, holding you so your body hovered over him. You knew the position was so he could look straight through your damn soul but you couldn’t handle that right now….eyes fluttering down to your lap instead. 
“Y/n” No, he needed you to look at him, gently reaching down to cup your tear-stained face, eyes, and nose rivaling a blowfish!  
“And I say again…you don't have to do this alone anymore. I’m here for you, for you my baby, in any, and every way you need. You wanna regroup and brainstorm as to how I can help more let’s do it, if you need me on the field more let’s fuckin do it! Whatever you need to make this easier just tell me .” His pause was intentional holding your gaze, making sure you felt that. Allowing you to search his eyes for any hints of uncertainty that he already knew you’d never find. 
“And if you fall apart guess what!? I’ll be there to help put you back together time, and time again...and this empire will be fine. Stop, stop thinking everyone’s gonna leave you, you’ve been acting as your father’s second in command since you were 19! More importantly, you’ve been running shit with very little delegation for well over a year and if anything this operation flourished. Give yourself more credit, everyone here thinks highly of you, and not because they have too...it’s because your someone worth being admired. Regardless of how dirty our work may be, you and I both know there’s still a way to run this with some heir of dignity! “ 
Reaching up to grab you by the nape of your neck, bringing your forehead down to rest against his own...hoping it would ground you a little “You got this baby..and you got me...I’d burn down the world for you in a second if need be and you know it! Imma get you through this...I promise!”
You let your eyes flutter shut briefly, trying to calm down, you could feel him pressing light kisses against your tear stained cheeks and you couldn't help but smile. Yeah, it was small, definitely did not reach your eyes but it was something...
“I know we aren’t the most honorable people, and he won’t get some fuckin gold plaque like the Mayor when he dies but my dad was a very honorable man for the work he did. And I’ve always tried to do the same, I just..fuck I just want him to be proud of me….I mean at least that.”  Your face hurts you were trying so hard not to cry anymore, a shaky breath ghosting off your lips. 
“He’s already never gonna see me, grow old or walk down the aisle or-.fuck..”  Shit…Hoseok look’s utterlly terried as to where this is going....
“Fuck, he’s never gonna see me walk down the aisle one day” Eyes wide, panicked I guess this was the first time you’d had that thought...the first time you’re really thinking about all the things you’d have to do without him. You've always promised yourself that regardless of how crazy your world is...eventually once you're settled you’d stop denying your heart of its desires! 
Having someone to endlessly love and share this empire with is something you’ve always wanted...and something your father always told you, you deserved and would have one day! 
“Hes nev- holy shit what if I have ki-oh my god.” Every word felt as though it was strangling you, as it hiccups from your chest “ Oh. My. God ” Now this was a lot, this was pain strong enough to split you in half, all the thoughts you’d been avioding suddenly rushed to the surface! 
Your full blown sobbing into the side of his neck … and Hosoek’s heart hurts , fuck it hurts. slouching down into the couch, engulfing your body into his arms which only made you cry even harder. Ya know what makes it even worse? Is that there isn’t a damn thing he can do about this kinda pain. There’s no one he can shoot or stab to make it go away and it’s fucking gut-wrenching, as your body breaks apart above him . 
“Shhh,your okay baby, it’ll be okay….” Even Hoseok didn’t believe that, he didn’t have the slightest idea as to how he was going to get you through losing the first man you ever loved! But fuck if he wasn’t going to try! 
“Listen to me, stop, don’t do that to yourself” Gripping the sides of your face tight enough in his palms to force you ro focus on him and only him. “Let’s get you home alright? Will talk about work and all the other bullshit later you just need-”
“Y/n! Y/n!” 
Who the actual hell...
The sound of someone squawking your name like they’d lost their damn minds had both of you rerouting your attention. Completely shattering the moment causing your body to tense on command. Your brains been wired for so many years to just cut off emotions at the blink of an eye it almost happens on autopilot now! Zoning in on the chaos that appears to be unfolding outside your door and within seconds your pain becomes old news! Which is….just great for your mental health but carry on! 
You could hear your guards all standing outside the door trying to calm whoever this person is with a very clear death wish down. However, they didn’t seem to falter.
“Y/n, open the damn door now! This is serious you can’t just shut me out like this!!” 
But wait, wait, wait, random’s don’t just get acess into the compound so there’s only so many options…
Then, you start to recognize the tenor...and so does Hoseok, and he’s fucking livid. You could literally feel every muscle in his body tense from beneath you. Reaching down to snatch you off his lap, and tucking  himself back into his pants so damn fast you almost got whiplash. If he wasn’t soft before he definitely was now! 
“You’ve gotta be shitting me!” Striding over to your desk to grab your Glock34 from the drawer. 
“I fuckin told him not to come here today...” Growled through gritted teeth, as he reloaded your gun, spinning the barrel. 
Shit.
”Yn! YN! We need to talk about what’s going on with dad!” The slow-motion drawl said it all, he’s high as hell and it’s your fucking brother…
“Ohhh, he wants to talk about your father?!” Tone loud and Exaggeratedly cheerful as they leave his lips sing song esque “Of fucking course he does!” 
“Hoseok-” Yeah, this wasn’t ending well, swiftly readjusting your dress back around your thighs. Though your thighs felt like a damn slinky you still ran over to barricade yourself in front of the door! The door that your brother was still banging on like a fucking idiot!
“Jason. Leave!!!” Praying the distress resonated through the pans of marble, your just now realizing how gone your voice truly is, honestly you don’t even know if he heard you. But for his sake, you hope it did, because it Hoseok gets through this door...
“Nooo,Jason stay!” 
“Hoseok…” Bracing your hand firm against his chest, pushing him away from the door. The warning laced within your tone was clear as all hell, no matter how brittel it was .
“Nah, he wants to talk, let’s fuckin talk! He’s the last thing you need to be worrying about right now, considering he only gives a fuck about you when he’s tapped out of his monthly allowance! What? All of a sudden he cares so deeply about your father?” Brow arched knowingly “ Let him even fix his mouth to say the word “Will” and I will buss a cap so far up his asshole, he’ll cough out all the coke he’s been sniffin’!”
“Y/n, I can have him escorted-”
“One second Spade!” That mans been around since you were in middle school. You know the sound of his voice anywhere, yeah even muffled through a marble wall.
“Comere” Tone dropping to a purr, that you knew wans’t fair but fuck it, no matter how angry he’s on you in seconds, like I said...he can’t deny you anything. 
Leaning forward to wrap your arms around his waist and you can feel how tense his body is initially...yet he still instinctively lets his hands find their home right on the swell of your ass. The edge of the glock resting against your waist…..
 “Baby, I know your angry, and I know that’s mostly because of me, hell I was just chewing him out a second ago. But at the end of the day he is my brother and that is our dad...that’s damn near on a fuckin resperator. I know how to keep him at arms length... I don’t have the mental capacity for this right now. But, I’m gonna open that door, and see what the hell he wants, and I need you, for me...to just chill. If he gets outta line I’ll have him escorted out.”  He physically growled at that, Hoseok would much rather handle this on his own.
Leaning up to card your fingers through his hair, acting as if you didn't even notice his little tantrum “I really need you by my side tonight, and I need you to stay calm,because I’m far from it. Let’s hear him out and if he steps out of lines he’s out.” 
Wrapping his hand around the one you have laced within his hair “You already know I can’t say no to you!” He’s pissed about it too, long gone are the days when he could just do what he pleased regardless of who it affected. 
“But I swear to go Y/n, if and when he steps outta line-fuck-you just better make sure,  your boys are ready to throw his ass out ...because if I do it...he’s gonna end up in the ER for more than just wirthdrawls!”
`__________________________________________________
THAT’S ALLL SHE WROTE FOR NOW…KINDA I ALSO WROTE HALF OF PART TWO, SO IF YOU ENJOYED SHOW THIS SOME LOVE AND COME TALK TO ME! My GENERAL RULE OF THUMB IS AS LONG AS SOMETHING GETS AT LEATS 100 LIKES I’LL CONSIDERING ADDING TO IT DOWN THE LINE!
ALSO,  A LITTLE BONUS BECAUSE I DID MAP OUT THE FIRST 4 CHAPTERS BACK WHEN I WROTE THIS...
_________________________________________________________
It’s clear the OC’s brother will probably/definitely be an issue, in more ways then one! As well as her father is obviously going to die, like, within the first couple of chapters.
Her family’s association is called “Grim” and she’s commonly known as “The princess of the Grim clan”. 
There is a 2nd member set to be introduced in part 2 that will eventually work for the OC...hint it’s a makane! He tries to robe one of their local establishments and well...clearly that probably won’t end too well…
Jin is a mob associate...his family's Forbes ranked multi-million dollar empire was founded with blood money! Sooo, he’s a mutual between “Grim” and “The King Tapian’s”.
3 of the other members are in another association overseas called “The King Tapian’s”. A name she’s heard of, as they have one hell of a rep but they’ve never “officially” crossed paths. That is, until another death within the mob world which brings a new territory on the market! One that her fathers been eying for years over in Europe! (Another hint, they kinda join forces and eventually agree to co-inhabit the area in efforts to shove another “shysterier” gang out, which in turn starts a little war if you will!) The other members would be a sub-focus however It was undecided as to how big of a part they’d all play!
 Lastly, the final member is a freelance hacker/hitman that knows Hoseok very well, so much so the pair used to fool around back in the day so yes that would make him BI! 
I was also undecided if I wanted to incorporate another member sexually or not...as I’d dabbled with the idea of them being in an open relationship! There was also the possibility of making the “King Tapian” Boys lowkey poly! Either solely male on male or maybe throw in the idea of a minor female character who i’d name so there’s no confusion! 
The overall gist of the story was essentially the OC finding her footing after her father dies. Making her own path as one of the only women in charge on the black market! While also creating some allies and gaining of course some enemies along the way! Regardless this would also be a Hoseok centered series with the possibility of semi regular OT7 guest appearances!
  Love you as always,
Rocki,
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channoticedmeuwu · 11 months ago
Text
To Infinity And Beyond | Chapter 3 : Surprising Discovery
pairing : huang renjun x (multistan) fem!reader 
genre : fluff, angst, action, spy!au, undercover hero!au 
started : 13.12.20
finished : ???
warnings : fire, mentions of a bomb blast
a/n : im so so so sorry idk why i didn’t upload this even though i finished writing this chapter AGES ago neknkenk eNJOY !!
prev | next 
to infinity and beyond : masterlist 
-------------------------------------------------
"Dude, this sucks."
Three boys tripped over fallen chunks of a burning building. The tallest, whining, was falling behind, kicking small pieces from the corner of his foot. One of them seemed to be too busy by the data on his computer to even notice him. The one leading in front seemed to be more concerned and careful than annoyed. He brushed his raven hair out of his eyes as he coughed, flapping his arm to avoid the smoke.
"Run a scan."
The tallest whined again, "Renjun. There was bomb. The building is in literal shreds. It's 4am. There won't be anyone or anything aliv-"
"I picked something up!"
The two other boys scrambled next to the one with the computer. His hazel eyes scanned over the purple and black computer screen. "There's a person. He's...no she's still alive," he snapped his head in front, pointing to a corner of the building, "In there! We should do something."
"Are you crazy!? Have you seen the shape of this thing? Who knows if this thing is still yet to combust? And- rENJUN WHERE ARE YOU GOING?"
"What do you mean?" Renjun snapped his head around, his eyes filled with annoyance, "I'm saving her. She's been in a blast. She's buried under a fallen building I don't know how many stories high. And she's alive. It isn't rocket science, Jisung."
(Han ji btw)
"Do you at least have the mask!?"
"No!" Renjun yelled back, scoffing, the corner of his mouth twisting with amusement, "I don't!"
"I hate being in charge! If you die, Jihyo is going to kill me!"
"Not my problem!"
And with that, Renjun ran inside, covering his mouth with his arm.
He reached the area with no problem. Oh...great. Here is where the training came in handy. He pushed a large piece off smaller pieces that held it above like a platform. He pushed the small rocks apart. The smoke started to fog his eyes, causing his throat to dry and choke. He coughed, but it didn't distract him. Hurry up, Renjun. If you don't hurry, she could die. He saw her face, finally. He grabbed her shoulders and pulled her further away and sat down, her head on his lap. He checked her pulse. It was faint, she was barely breathing. Had it not been for the smaller rocks holding up the larger one, leaving up space for air and her, she would have been crushed. Around her face, there were cuts and scratches of blood. Her lip was cut, her nose had a large slash across it, her cheeks were dusted with the blush of her own blood and black smog. Without the blood and her horrible state, he had to admit, she would have been slightly attractive. Only slightly. He chucked, glancing around.
He picked her up, bridal style, in his arms and ran out. Outside, Jisung was throwing a tantrum. He sat far away in a corner, leaving her to Jisung to fix her condition.
"We have to take her back to HQ. If we leave her here, she'll die," The boy with the computer sat down, snapping his tech goggles off. "She's hardly breathing."
Jisung gasped dramatically. "What about the secret package!?"
The younger boy raised an eyebrow, gesturing towards the computer. "I have it..."
"Awe," Jisung looked at Renjun, "This is why I like Heuningkai better than you."
"I hate you too, you shrimp."
-----
"Move over! Move!"
 Renjun and Heuningkai watched Jisung carry the girl into the emergency room from a distance. Renjun sighed, leaning against the wall peacefully, closing his eyes Heuningkai sipping his bitter coffee as normally the three would on any normal 5AM mission conquest. The other agents walked around in the halls, some back from other missions, other having leisure time. Some teachers moved about here and there, chasing some students about how they should never forget their lab equipment, especially after dealing with chemicals. He heard Heuningkai take in a deep breath.
"Hey, Renjun? That was brave."
He opened his eyes, watching the younger male's eyes twinkle, "Huh?"
"You were so great. The way you ran in without hesitation. I'm impressed."
He chuckled, ruffling his hair, "Not so bad yourself, Hyuka. Detected her like that? You're getting better at that tech stuff. I could never."
Heuningkai punched Renjun in the arm. "Shut it, Huang."
There was silence, and then Heuningkai continued, "How old do you think she is? She doesn't look like a normal citizen to me."
Renjun furrowed his eyebrows in thought. "I don't know...19? 20?"
"Oh, she's young."
"Seems to be in her early 20s."
"And did you see that pocket knife casually hanging from her belt?"
"Something tells me," Renjun thrust his tongue in his cheek, "that she isn't just a mere citizen."
The boy beside him scoffed. "Well, no shit, Sherlock. She had one of those cool GPS tracker things too. They're hella expensive."
"Hm... I'll discuss it with Jihyo. She'll know."
"Speaking of her...are the girls back yet? It's been around 36 hours."
"Not that I heard of it."
Jisung exited the emergency room, sighing and wiping his forehead with a tissue. He walked over to the two with a glass of water and leaned next to them. "Damn. Is it me or is she kinda hot?"
Heuningkai rolled his eyes. "Are you going to try and hit on her too?"
"Hey, give me a break, wise guy. Last time you had a girlfriend was junior year of high school."
"And last time you had one, it was the second year of middle school."
"Hey! Stop yelling that out loud!"
"Stop thinking about her, Jisung," Renjun's sudden outburst made not Heuningkai and Jisung look towards him with raised eyebrows. "W-what I meant was, she probably has a boyfriend anyway."
"Yes, exactly," Heuningkai continued, "Now, you owe me a jelly donut."
Jisung whined as Heuningkai dragged him along to the cafeteria, "Whyyyy~ I payed for your food last time, too! What bet did I lose this time!?"
LMAO I LOVE JISUNG'S VIBE HHHHH
-------------
Renjun walked inside the room quietly. The girl quietly lay on the bed, tucked into the crisp, white, cold sheets. Her hair were let open loose, and seemed to be combed and swept on one side. The blood and smog on her was completely vanished, and her heartbeat displayed on the monitor beside her. Her eyes were shut softly, and her mouth was open the slightest bit as she breathed from it. She's been out cold for a while now.
Her skin seemed to be pale and lost its color. The veins on her hands seemed to pop out more, her collarbones prominent. Her face was similar to an angel's, sleeping soundly. If she has a pair of white wings, he'd think he's either dead and in heaven, or he's dreaming. Yet, she looked so weak and fragile. He clicked his tongue.
She frowned in her sleep, and her eyelids began to flutter open slowly. She flinched at the bright lights in the room, and her shaking, brown eyes, that reminded him of hot cocoa, slowly adjusted and focused on him. She tried to sit up, and her arms failed her, and she fell back into bed with a soft poof, her melted sugar colored hair bounced a little bit. She opened her mouth and spoke, her voice hoarse and sounded like it hurt to just speak, "Who are you?"
He pulled a chair and sat next to her. "Do you remember anything?"
"Me?"
He nodded, trying hard not to smile from her curious tone.
She closed her eyes, and then opened them. "I was going..." She paused, and looked at him, finally noticing his get up. He had taken off his bulletproof vests and only wore his jacket and utility belt. Her eyes trailed down to his thigh, where his gun was strapped on. He looked down, and back at her, fanning his hands, "Don't worry, don't worry. I won't harm you."
He noticed she didn't look alarmed.
 "Oh, I know," her voice was too calm, "I was...going to deliver something."
"Where were you when the blast happened?"
"I was inside."
There was silence.
He looked at her. "Inside?"
"Mhm," she said with a shrug, her eyes turning glassy, "Locked in. Left to rot."
"Are...are you alright?"
"Yes," she sighed, her breath shaking, "I'm better than alright."
He stood up, taking her pocket knife out his pocket. They collected her weapons before they put her in the emergency room. He flicked it in his hand. "I believe this is yours?"
She gave him a glare. "How do you have that?"
He gestured towards her hips, scoffing, "Where's your belt?"
She glanced down, feeling her empty hips. "Ugh. Alright, Einstein, may I have it back?" She asked, extending her hand out.
He smiled, flinging it in the air and catching it. "Hm...it's better than the one I have."
"My mom gave it to me."
"Oh?" He looked at her, she was raising her eyebrow, "Your mom?"
"No," she smiled, batting her eyelashes. Oh, this girl. "The squirrel I met on the way to hell did."
"That's cool!" He said, keeping it back in his pocket. "And now it's mine."
She glared at him as if she'd been flirted with by someone who frequently uses overused pick up lines, "No it's not? Give it back?"
"No? Finders keepers. Losers weepers."
"You're so lucky I can't stand."
"Am I? Well, it's been great talking to you," he said, digging his hands into his pockets as he casually strolled to the door, "but I think I gotta go. Duty calls. The doctor will be here, though!"
The door slammed, and it was Y/n's turn to let out a curse.
-----------------------------
tags : @guerillrah @radiorenjun 
send an ask or a dm to be in the taglist :>
have a wonderful day, everyone!!
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identityvarchives · a year ago
Text
Mellifluous
Pairing: Luka Balsa x Gn!Reader
Genre: Post-manor AU, fluff
Warning(s): None
Word Count: 1567
It felt as if it had been a millennium since you last saw clear blue skies - not a single cloud obscured the deep serene today, allowing golden light to bounce off of your (e/c) hues. As a steaming cup of tea sat next to you on the bench in your back garden, your mind wandered off to contemplate about life.
An entire week had passed since the survivors were given back their freedom, and the hunters were released from their physical forms to finally be put at rest. It honestly felt weird to return to your old schedule, to go about your day without having to worry about winning a game of cat and mouse - and while the survivors returned to their respective homes, you still kept in touch through letters.
All but one.
Luka Balsa, also known as the Prisoner.
For some reason, he chose to stay by your side and traveled back with you to your hometown. Not that you minded since you were close to him back in Oletus Manor (and it was also a good thing that you live alone), but you always wondered if there was anyone waiting for him back at home.
You were pulled out of your thoughts when a gloved hand was waved in front of your face. Blinking twice, you raised your head to see a certain brunette standing in front of your with a teacup of his own. A snaggle-toothed smile graced his lips once he got your attention, and he then took a seat on the other side of your cup.
“So you were here, huh? Daydreaming again?” he asked rhetorically.
“You were looking for me?” you uttered, responding with a question of your own.
“Obviously. Who else lives in this house besides me?” Luka took a quiet sip of his hot beverage while gazing at the blooming flowers in front of him.
You let out a soft chuckle. “Alright Mr Prisoner, what do you need?”
At your question, the former survivor shot you a sly look and answered, “How about we have a little match?”
You did a double-take. You searched Luka’s eyes for any signs that he might be joking, but found none, and gave him a baffled look.
“How is that going to work? There are only two of us and no hunter,” you replied, tilting your head to the side quizzically, “We don’t even have a map and cipher machines or the sort either.” The prisoner rolled his eyes at you playfully before leaning over to lightly flick your forehead, eliciting a small yelp from you.
“No silly, not that kind of match,” he said, “Okay, maybe I should have worded it better, but I’ll toss a coin-” He fished a coin out of his pocket; “and you’ll guess what I toss. The loser has to do one thing the winner asks. How’s that?”
You stared at him, deadpan. Is he being serious right now? “Doesn’t that give me a huge advantage, though? I have good eyes, you know.”
“Of course! I’m not gonna lose,” he confidently replied, grinning with his eyes closed. Letting out a muted sigh, you lifted the teacup to your lips and relented to his wishes. You thought about what you should make him do since you were certain that you’d win, given your excellent vision.
“Sure. Just don’t regret this later,” you told him.
“Well, here goes!” As his grin widened, the prisoner promptly tossed the coin high into the air. “There!”
Everything seemed to happen in slow motion the moment your eyes focused on the flipping coin. You could already guess which side it would land on during its descent, so when Luka caught the coin and asked for your answer, you immediately responded.
“Now, your answer?” He was looking at you eagerly for some reason, but you weren’t bothered by it.
“Heads.”
‘I know I’m right,’ you thought, plastering a miniscule smile over your lips. He sent a smirk your way before slowly uncovering the coin to reveal the right answer. Your eyes widened in surprise when you found yourself gazing upon a silver ring adorned with a single (f/c) flower gem.
“Oh, you did a trick,” you remarked, amazed by his small feat, “That’s crazy. How did you do it?”
He doubled over with laughter at your gold reaction, perplexing you. What was so funny about that?
“And there you have it. It’s your loss!” he declared whilst standing up and pointing at you dramatically.
“H-huh?! Wait a second-! I didn’t know it wasn’t going to be a coin!” you interjected in protest, a pout crossing your features, “That wasn’t fair at all, Luka!”
Sniggering, he told you as a reminder, “Well I did ask you to guess… what I was going to toss…” His smirk seemed to become even more smug, if possible, and as if to add to your irritation at being fooled, he gave you a thumbs up. Your eyes instantly narrowed into a glare, and you had to use all of your willpower to stop yourself from decking him then and there. “Since you lost, you’ll have to listen to what I have to say. Okay?”
A long, drawn-out sigh slipped past your lips as you leaned back on the bench. “It can’t be helped… I won’t go back on my words.” You grumbled. When your full attention returned to Luka, you noticed that he appeared rather nervous, which made you raise an eyebrow inquisitively. You didn’t ask him anything though and simply waited for him to say something.
Swallowing thickly, the brunette slowly lowered himself on one knee in front of you before placing his right hand on top of yours. He hasn’t uttered a single word yet his hands were already starting to get clammy. You blinked when your eyes met.
“(Full name),” he began, his voice loud and clear, “please marry me.”
You were totally caught off-guard by his sudden proposal. You hadn’t thought about getting married, let alone getting into a marriage engagement with someone you were bonded closely to. The abruptness of the events that had just transpired rendered you speechless, causing the prisoner to lose his confidence. As a dark blush crawled over his cheeks, he was only able to maintain the eye contact for a few more seconds before he curled up into a ball on the ground, his embarrassment overpowering the other emotions.
“L-Luka-” you called.
“I’m done. I totally did not look cool,” he muttered, “There must have been some other way… I’m sorry to be telling you like this.” Lifting himself off the ground, he raised the hand that was in possession of the ring he bought earlier in town. “This ring, you see, I found it while grocery shopping.” He then released a sheepish chuckle, his gaze shifting to the side awkwardly. “Word in town is that when you propose a marriage, it’s popular to give your partner a ring…?!” His voice jumped when he noticed the streams of tears cascading from your eyes. Shocked by your response, Luka froze whilst panicking internally.
‘I… I made them cry! Whyyyy!!’ he thought, looking everywhere but at you.
“Sorry, Luka… I didn’t know…” you whispered, sniffling. Reaching up, you wiped your tears away with the back of your hand.
He quickly shot up and exclaimed, “No, no! It’s because I let it get to my head and decided to go with the trend and thought of something stupid. I’m so sorry for making you cry and embarrassing you like this! I-I’ll make amends for this, alright?!”
You shook your head. “No… that’s not it. I… I…” Leaning forward, you covered your face with both hands and continued to weep. “I could cry even when I’m happy… I had no idea…”
A moment of silence was shared between the two of you, the zephyrs entangling the red string of fate that would forever bound you to one another. A wave of relief washed over him, and he then dropped onto his knees once more, his own eyes brimming with tears of happiness.
“Then… Then, your reply…?” He waited for the words to leave your lips in anticipation - though he already had an idea of what you were going to say.
Smiling through the tears, you removed your hands from your face and said, in the clearest voice you could muster in your state, “Please… take care of me, Luka!”
Words could not describe the immense feeling of joy that enveloped his entire being at that very moment. Tears fell as he beamed, thanking the heavens above for allowing him to meet you. If he hadn’t accepted the invitation to Oletus Manor, he would have never found the true answer to his happiness. It didn’t matter anymore if he couldn’t remember all of his brilliant inventions in the past - all that matters now is building the brightest future for you.
“I DID IT!!” Without a second thought, he embraced you tightly. You squeaked in surprise when you were pulled against his chest, but you didn’t resist him. “I’ll make you happy for sure; I promise!” Sobbing into your shoulder, he poured every ounce of his love for you in the hug.
As you reciprocated his gesture, you uttered, “Yes… I know you will…”
Suddenly, the sunlight that was dappled over your forms felt warmer.
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anastasialovesoranges · 11 months ago
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So yeah hello again, good morning(it’s like 3 pm heh), let’s finish this! Bridgerton episode 8 :
• btw instead of going to sleep I ended up rereading Romancing Mr Bridgerton for like an hour and now I’m even more miserable. I’ll probably make a rant post about why I don’t like Lady Whistledown decision so much.
• A BEE AGAIN YAY
• I don’t know why (maybe in contrast with book!Simon) I always doubt he is really in love with her or at least cares as much as Daphne. I may be projecting though lol
• “Francesca will be arriving home tomorrow. How exciting!” WELL YEAH HYACINTH HOW FECKIN EXCITING
• Now I don’t think I want Penelope and Colin together (and they were my favorite book couple)
• the set is still gorgeous
• Daphne as always decides to discuss her husband problems with anyone but himself
• I don’t know why but I don’t remember Eloise book well and I haven’t reread it yet, so I’m not excited about Sir Phillip (well a bit excited)
• I have a hard time to feel something about Marina
• Also I find it funny that in universe it is not really established how horrible the Featheringtons dresses are (like yeah they look a bit weird but the costumes in Bridgerton are a bit all over the place anyway). I miss Lady Whistledown fashion remarks, that’s it.
• Benedict brings me joy
• I know in the books their big fight and Simon leaving her maybe sounded a little too trope-y even for a romance novel, but I prefer it that way, like a big emotional climax. In the show they look a little weird for me, like they don’t have much to do (which is true, I agree with people who thinks the season was stretched)
• In that regard I have no idea why Daphne would not have tried to talk to Simon about his past a bit sooner THAN THE LAST EPISODE (and they still haven’t discussed it in the end! aaaaa)
• Lord Featherington still doesn’t exist (still love Ben Miller though)
• Marina “I did what I had to do” Thompson can’t marry a respectable man who tries to make up for his brother’s mistakes BECAUSE SHE DOESN’T LOVE HIM. I don’t even hate her, I hate how implausible the whole plot is. (Philippa is still pretty.)
• I just hate that Simon haven’t opened up to her, why does she have to learn it this way?
• Why Benedict didn’t have a sex scene? AND MAY I REMIND YOU HE HAD A THREESOME
• So Lady Danbury came to ask Daphne and not her mother? Okay
• I still wish Simon struggled more with his speech (because it kinda fueled the hate for his father)
• Every time they mention Francesca I want to scream
• OH SHIT GUYS FRANCESCA EXISTS
• the.. MODISTE
• wow Colin sings! Love you, you silly boy
• I still can’t look at Penelope
• Gregory is a sweetheart
• but really, yellow dresses are the obvious nod to the books but why didn’t they mention “an overripe citrus fruit”?
• lol no shit Sherlock she is still pregnant
• funny they mention the real dances and DIDN’T ACTUALLY PERFORM ANY OF IT
• I love you Anthony but why are you so stupid?
• I still wish Daphne wore more “mature” colors when she’s married
• every time they mention how bad the corsets are I want to scream
• what was that? Lord Featherington? Sorry I blinked
• DON’T YOU DARE SHOW ME COLIN AND PENELOPE AFTER WHAT YOU’VE DONE THE THEM ( I really hope they won’t push their relationship earlier, ten years was a bit much but it was essential they both grew a lot to be a couple and I hope it wouldn’t be changed, although I’m not so sure)
• I have no clue either, Colin
• lol Anthony did I tell you you’re stupid? (good for you Siena! No really she’s right there is no garantie with these boys)
• HOWEVER I’d like to point out she wasn’t happy he treated her like a mistress at the begging of the season and now she don’t want to be his lady either ( I know it’s more complicated than that but what he’s supposed to do? There’s no future for them but she doesn’t need to blame him for it)
• still love you Anthony!
• poor Violet I love her so much
• *insert Dr Cox’s speech about the couples who are truly right for each other*
• YEAH THE CANE
• Did she just tell the Queen to leave?
• I am still pissed they ACTUALLY DISCUSSED THEIR PROBLEMS in the very last episode. Yeah I know it’s goes well with the genre but I wish we could see some work on their relationship
• (I still don’t believe show!Simon loves her as much as book!Simon)
• Am I the only one who is consistently annoyed with Marina’s bad posture?
• Lord Featherington is dead? Wasn’t he dead all along?
• I don’t know why I feel the need to say it, but I’ll say it anyway : I know it’s just lighthearted romance novels or a silly tv show but FOLKS PLEASE REMEMBER YOU ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO FIX YOUR LOVED ONE. Yeah I know the message “we’ll be together and nothing less will matter” is cute and all but sadly it doesn’t work like that. Why the show wants to be progressive in some ways but didn’t bother to work on how relationships are presented? Simon basically haven’t changed at all, it’s just 8 eight episodes and then “I guess I’m not a sad boy anymore” (it’s okay if you wanted to get your mind off of things and don’t mind this happy ending at all, I just wanted to point it out)
• No joke I really forgot about Lord Featherington and thought Penelope cried about Colin leaving
• I’m still not sure Francesca is real
• WHYYY BUT WHYYYY THEY MADE ANTHONY A SAD BOY AS WELL (well yeah he was a sad boy but for entirely different reason, and he did believe in love)
• WHYYYY BUT WHYYYYY THEY DECIDED TO REVEAL LADY WHISTLEDOWN NOW (also she kinda looks like a vilain whyyy)
• Violet is here too yaaay!
• (at least the baby looks like a newborn and not like a one year old)
• A BEE
So that’s it. I know I complained a lot about many things, but I don’t think the show is bad, and I’m sure I would’ve find it more enjoyable if I haven’t read the books. I will watch next seasons although I am still not sure how to feel about Penelope (as I said, I’ll probably write why I didn’t appreciate certain changes). So yeah, it was good heh
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whatiwillsay · a year ago
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I’m not sure if Taylor ever dated Lily but I personally think they did have something after Kaylor ended. Let’s say they DID have something.... it makes sense that Joe is a cover up for that relationship. I mean, it’s really hard to tell, Lily is not that open with her life (unlike c(k)ertain someone.... and no this is not shades) but like.... I lowkey love the possibility of her and Tay might be involved with each other y’know? lmao. And why did I think that?
1. Her similarities to Joe is just...uncanny. Blue eyes, London (Camden) based, blonde, dimple, cute brit accent. Given the pattern of Taylor’s bearding, which often mirrors her “real” relationship, this might be y’know... the proof? 💀💀
2. Like someone else said, she deleted everything related to Karlie after 2016 (which is FISHY AF) and I did some research as well... Karlie’s sister (u know which one lol) used to follow Lily back in 2015-ish since i notice she likes a couple of pic from Lily’s old ig post, but i check again her following list, she apparently unfollow lily (which i assume somewhere in 2016 bc i don’t see her liking any lily’s post after thaaaat) but still follow some of Karlie’s other model friends which is abit sus you knooow. (or maybeee she unfollows her bc Lily is not active on ig anymoreeee so who knows but she stills active in 2016 right? hmm wonder whyyyy maybe something related to dating her sister’s ex probs? hmmm) jk this is only speculation guys... moving on :) —->
3. The legendary 2016 thanksgiving or halloween party heheh (the absent of miss KK.....). It’s when we constantly see Lily next to Tay, (I mean the body languageeeee tho, tell me that ain’t looking like a woman crushing hard on someone?? jk jk unless...) but like.... you know. And Taylor drove her around??? pretty uber driver?? that happy birthday wishes on ig??? love you muchoo??? what’s AT guysss?? damn, shdjdjsk gfs much huh
Tbh, I have more to say, like I want to dig into this ship simply because it’s waaay too interesting not to talk about lol but I do feel bad at the same time since Lily is a private person... so kinda don’t want to be invasive :( As for Joe, tbh, he seems like a very good friends of Taylor, who is first hired as a beard but developed into a more comfortable, supportive brother-sister relationship with her afterwards (lmaooo) OR they are a real deal after Tily ended who knows (that’s it, if Tily ever was a thing)
Damn that was long rant about miss gorgerous, blue eyes, weirdly cute accents lily donaldson... wait, i swear i’m not implying gorgeous is about her........... or am I? skskskks (anyways, this is kinda random but....i’m with you, manifesting swiftgron hangout 2020 😭 it’s about time)
thank you for reading! stay safe ✨
hey sparky (if that’s you)
good thoughts all around
point 1 is the one that really gets me
joe is a perfect cover for lily
they definitely have a certain kind of energy that just...yeah...
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having-a-hyperfixate · 4 months ago
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Week 2, Day 2
Safety cut, line breaks where the original posts ended.
WELL WE’RE OFF TO A GREAT START THAT’S A PROMISING VISION. I expect that’ll be referencing- Well the mission showed up as I was typing this FUCK ME. I expect that’ll be referencing the scene from the release date trailer and now back to me screaming.
TODAY’S MISSION IS WHAT. FUCK ME. EVEN IF THIS GUY ISN’T NEKU OR ANYONE ELSE I ALREADY KNOW. EVEN IF HE HADN’T SAVED MY ASS LAST WEEK. NOT HAPPENING. FUCK YOU SHIBA. RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!
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I had to go run errands (I forgot the god damn garlic butter whyyyy) and am SLIGHTLY calmer now. Gonna pick it back up in a sec but I wanted to take a moment to appreciate the hilarity of Shoka thinking there’s even the slightest chance Neku would EVER join them. Dude. He hated the whole system under the old rules, and these rules are MUCH MUCH crueler. Ain’t no way in hell. If he did join it would be purely to immediately assassinate them all.
I think the Officers, at least, are probably expecting that. I don’t buy that they’re using the Players to hunt him down so they can make sure he’s legit and then recruit him. I think its more like using the Players to wear him down and then swoop in for the kill.
And on that cheery note, let’s do this thing.
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Just got back to the Scramble after going out past Cat Street (where is Wildkat. WHERE) and uh. What is Shiba talking about. Excuse me. Oh boy. This is about to suck isn’t it.
*deep breath*
shitshitshitshitshitshitshit GIRL DON’T DO IT HE’S A PERSON HE’S NOT SOME KIND OF NOISE NONONONONONONONO ohfuckohno 
Praise be to rewinding time JEEZ.
Ok first of all fuck me. Second, Tsugumi’s clearly Not Okay? She wasn’t gonna do it and then skeezy said he’s not a Reaper or a Player so he might as well be Noise and the sound she made… 
If I understood what happened in A New Day correctly, she was IN Shinjuku when it Inverted, whatever the hell that means. So she has probably Seen Some Shit. And who knows if she’s been in the UG since that happened. Or even when that happened.
“we need to find him before that public execution” YOU DON’T SAY.
This game stresses me out.
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So I went toward Shibuya Hikarie first and I guess this is the way I was supposed to go cuz Kariya gave me a hint and now I’ve found a Pureheart who almost had a heart attack from being glared at too hard.
He’s headed toward the River. I. Aaaaaah….
Edit: Nope it looks like I’m gonna have to do all three.
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After staring at that logic puzzle for WAY TOO LONG ahaha we are. back at the bus terminal. Right by the River.
AND Tsugumi is already here. AWESOME. Well we know where it is now. Here goes everything nothing…
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I’M SORRY WHAT?! WHY IS. W- MR M- WHY IS HER MR MEW EVIL?!?!
………………………. WHAT.
how badly is this thing gonna kick my ass >.>
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Thankfully demon Mr Mew didn’t kick my ass.
AND I FINALLY KNOW FOR SURE WHO THE GUY IS.
WHY THE HELL ARE YOU BACK HERE BEAT. I WOULD LIKE AN EXPLAIN. PLZ. Some things never change though. Saw some kids hung out to dry and said screw that. I cannot wait for the chaos that is no doubt about to unfold. I wonder it he’ll have a special psych as well. I wonder if Minamimoto recognized Beat. Or vice versa.
So that person behind the computer screen HAS to be Rhyme then. They were also blonde. With Beat being in the UG it would make sense that she’s looking for a way to contact him somehow. I wonder if there’s some kind of coordinated cross-layer operation going on.
Kariya has to know SOMETHING, right? He pointed me in the right direction, and even brought up the ‘but is it really Neku’ question.
Speaking of, I would like to know what happened to him after Coco shot him. …. I might have an actual cry if Beat came here looking for Neku. My heart would not be able to handle it.
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datgenderqueerboi · 12 months ago
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This week I have gotten 2 brand-new WPATH letters for phalloplasty.
Today I sent them in to the NYU team, and they said “we still need 1 hormone therapy letter either from an endocrinologist/Doctor/Nurse Practitioner” which I had forgotten about.
I’ve scheduled a Telehealh appointment tomorrow with the nurse practitioner who prescribes my testosterone (I’ll write more about my T dose later) and I’ll ask for a proof-of-hormones letter then.
This is my second set of phalloplasty letters because the team says they need to have been written within 1 year of the surgery, which is now scheduled for May 2021, and I got my first set of letters written before my initial consultation with the team in 2018!
Now I literally have 8 different WPATH letters saved on my laptop at this point (+1 testosterone, +1 top surgery, +2 hysterectomy, +2 phalloplasty consult, +2 phalloplasty surgery) which isn’t including the “proof I’m on testosterone and need testosterone” letters which I needed to provide for each surgery (and to get a medical exemption for being in sports).
And that makes me kinda angry... are 8 letters really necessary?? It’s a waste of time and money for everyone to have to have multiple appointments with a bunch of professionals and take up time and resources just to conclude “yup, you’re trans and want to transition” eight times. And why would a letter expire?
It’s an unnecessary barrier for folks who don’t have the time or money to go through the whole process repeatedly especially when you consider how hard it is to find a therapist willing to write a letter in some places.
It’s all a bit ridiculous. I don’t see why I should have to repeatedly go through the process of having a doctor deem me “trans enough” to deserve access to autonomy over my choices about my own body when my own assertion should be enough. If I say that I want the surgery, I know what the relevant medical intervention involves and I know the risks, and I consent to it... what else is necessary? It’s my body, my choice.
But instead I am forced to answer invasive personal questions from people who honestly don’t need to be in my business and don’t need know anything about my feelings.
Plus it’s not easy to have to explain needing to transition because it’s just... how I feel. I was asked “why would you be happier with a penis?” And it’s like ?? I dunno why I feel like things aren’t right now or why I’d be happier after, I just would be.
I don’t even know why I feel this way— I just feel it, it isn’t like a thing you can really go into any deeper than that because it’s just such an innate part of me.
If I say something to the effect of “I feel like my genitals aren’t congruent with my experienced gender identity which is distressing and after surgery I will feel more comfortable in my body because my genitals will align with my internal sense of the parts I’m supposed to have,” they’re like “but whyyyy aren’t you comfortable in your body?” and it’s like uhhh that’s because I’m transgender.... and I don’t know why I am transgender it’s just the situation that seems to be occurring to me...
I don’t know if there’s a reason I feel dysphoria because I don’t know what causes being trans— it’s just something that I know I feel even though I can’t explain the logical reason why I might feel it.
Having to convince cisgender therapists that I am dysphoric enough to need access to this surgery and that this surgery would help alleviate said dysphoria is so ironic because they don’t know anything at all about non-binary gender identity, or even about what happens in ALT phalloplasty so it would seems that they’re the ones who are ill prepared to confirm that surgery is the right choice for someone if they don’t know much about trans identities or what’s involved in the surgery.
One of the providers literally said “Have you been harassed or abused for being trans? If anyone has been violent because of your genitals, that would be a good reason for getting surgery.”
mmm..., I don’t think I need to say more.
But even if they were more competent, I don’t like talking about my body or my dysphoria in the first place, and that’s true even with other trans folks. So I don’t want to talk about my feelings at all but I’ve still gotta tell them what they want to hear.
And on top of the lack of dignity in having to Perform my gender dysphoria and distress to be granted access to the treatment I need, it’s straight-up frustrating to have to do this process so many times.
I haven’t had any issues or delay in getting the most recent set of letters, probably because:
I’m relatively stable right now so I don’t have to fight the mental illness stigma
I’m older than I was when I started my medical transition so that ageism works in my favor now; people assume teens are “in a phase” but take young adults more seriously than they take teens
I fit into their expectations of how a trans person looks a little more neatly than when I was trying to get top surgery before I had started T
This makes it easier for them to overlook my non-binary gender and compartmentalize me into their stereotype of how a (binary) trans person should want to transition (“of course a trans man would want a penis to feel like a real man!”)
They figure that I must be sure about what I’m doing by this point because after you’ve been on hormones for a few years and had two transition surgeries they figure you must be committed to this trans thing so it’s easier going forward
But no cisgender therapist can judge what I need in my transition better than I can because I’m the only one living in my body and feeling my feelings. So even though I haven’t actually had any issues getting the letters and they’ve all deemed me competent enough, trans enough, and dysphoric enough to get phalloplasty, it’s just the concept of the thing that bugs me.
Each time I get letters I have to keep answering “yup, I came out to my parents 5 years and 6 months ago... yeah, they’re sort of supportive..,” like it shouldn’t matter what my parents think !! I’m 21 years old!! Why even ask about my parent’s reaction to me coming out 5 years ago, why should their reaction have any relevancy in whether I need phalloplasty? It feels like it’s just getting into my business for no real reason.
And in the end, the resulting letter always gets something wrong about my gender identity or my history in some way so all of them say slightly different things about me. Whatever! It is what it is.
I feel the same way about the insurance. I’ve got to show proof that I’m transgender by showing I’ve changed my gender marker and that I’ve medically transitioned before they’ll cover me, and it’s like ... I’m literally telling you that I’m trans and asking you to cover my testosterone and sex change and you’re like “ok, but first, prove you’re trans!” And it’s like uhh I’ve got a phalloplasty scheduled that I’m trying to get you to cover, is that not proof enough?? Why would I be asking for phalloplasty if I wasn’t trans?
I’m expecting my corrected birth certificate to come back by the end of the month, and hopefully I’ll get a letter attesting that I’m trans and have medically transitioned at my appointment tomorrow too.
To do:
Get hormone provider letter, send to NYU
Get proof of being trans medical letter, send to insurance company
Wait for updated birth certificate in mail, then send scan to insurance company with verification of being trans form
Figure out electrolysis coverage (get reimbursement for past electrolysis and switch to different location closer to grandparents?)
Try to get assistive mobility devices in advance of surgery to practice with? (Rollator, cane, etc)
Change testosterone dose and get blood work again (will elaborate in future post)
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