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#I understand her reasons I get the plot I still hate her
chamiryokuroi · 1 month
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Absolutely hate this thing I have seen recently in fandom in where you are not allowed to hate a character because “they had a reason” or “they were forgiven in canon already”
You are allowed to dislike/hate a character regardless of whatever redemption arc they had gone through in canon and nobody can tell you otherwise
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so-na-gi · 4 months
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2 things;
i feel like shit. 1 hour crying = free noko🐼 makeup (i;m not even going to fix my makeup i'll just go out like this. who tf cares)
i finished the witcher s1 yay. geralt (passed out for 99% of the episode) my sole support
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mayaree-darling · 7 months
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who's to say what's real or fake// Genshin SAGAU
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from aree: impostor au but you actually are the impostor? but ofcourse theres a twist. I think i'll call this FakeGrace!Reader. This was just going to be a headcannon post but ended up a whole fic plot
warnings: themes that all come with the sagau tag (yandere, lots of religious talk, cult, etc.)
word count: 2k~
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You end up on Teyvat and immediately the characters recognize you as their Creator; of course you're their Creator - you have the same face, name, and voice. You go through the ordeal of getting to know all the characters all over again and they in turn love you as the god they’ve been waiting for all this time.
You decide that well, this is the world and characters I spent blood, sweat, and tears building (even if it was behind a screen) so might as well help out and do what needs to be done. The people come to you for their problems and you find that they're not as difficult as when you were simply a player. Maybe a minor dispute here and there between the NPCs, but now the vision holders and the Archons ask for your thoughts on how to go about political matters concerning their nations. Even Snezhnaya has signed a peace treaty with the other nations as a show of good faith to the Creator (even if you know for a fact its a temporary one).
All has never been better.
Until another Creator appears in Teyvat, and this one bleeds gold the way their stories foretold. In a way you do not.
The vision holders are torn. Yes, you are an impostor, and they want to hate you for tricking them, but at the same time haven’t you only shown them love? Haven’t you been patient with them and understanding despite being thrown into a world you’re unfamiliar with?
But with careful coercion from the other god, they have to choose to follow their true Creator. You decide to take pity on them and step down from your position yourself, choosing to live with the Aranara who have gladly taken you under their wing (fake god you may be, you are still a friend of the forest, and the forest always remembers its friends).
The Archons tell their new Creator that you are no more. They pretend to not hear when the Creator says they should have brought your head with them, maybe just a bitter reaction for finding out that they have been serving an impostor all this time (the Archons are lying when they say they do not feel sickened at the idea of hurting you, and disgusted at this new God's words)
It soon becomes clear to the people of Teyvat that this new Creator is not you - none of the patience or kindness you had showed them. This new one thinks helping their people is below them, even laughs at some of their problems. They chuck their duties as a god to the vision holders and spend their days leisurely, wining and dining on the best food, expecting to be waited on hand and foot. And at first it was fine, the characters understood. Maybe their Creator was just enjoying the fruits of their labor for once (although in the back of their mind, they can't help but compare you - you who worked tirelessly to attend to everyone even when they’d almost beg you to take a break). The characters tell themselves that they just need to get used to this new god, their true Creator. It will all right itself in time. Even as the Creator acted more like a child by the day, calling for the punishment of characters for the simplest of things. It’s fine. It’s fine.
It didn't take long for their will to break.
The God of Wisdom is called as such for a reason. Nahida may be younger compared to the rest, but she is braver than most. She simply tried to impart a fraction of her wisdom, softly suggesting to the Creator to show mercy for their people who were gravely punished for things they did not do.
This Creator was not you. They did not have a drop of patience that you had, nor any love for their creations. Their god saw this as nothing but an act of treason. How dare a mere Archon tell them what to do? She dares to question who the Creator can and cannot punish?
The silence is deafening in the throne room as the Creator calls for the death of Lesser Lord Kusanali and the destruction of Sumeru. If it is mercy she asks for then it is the last thing she and her people will receive. The other Archons agree past gritted teeth, the sin of Khaenri’ah weighing heavy over their shoulders still.
Nahida had been banished to Sumeru before the order was given, so the Archons make their way to the Nation of Wisdom to tell her of her sentencing, hoping to beg her to ask the Creator for their forgiveness.
This can't be how it ends. Are they to spend their lives in fear of the god they so revered?
They enter a forest emitting divine energy in search of their friend, hearts heavy, but they found something else.
They found you. They found the Creator they loved once upon a time.
They seemed to have caught you mid-conversation with Nahida, and to their surprise (and resentment) the Tsaritsa; they can only assume that the god of Snezhnaya has informed you first of Nahida's fate. The Wanderer catches sight of them and stands in front of you in protection. You don't even bat an eye. You swallow hard and stand, Nahida's hand enveloped in yours, and the other gods would be lying if they say they did not feel jealousy strangling their lungs.
With a steady voice, you tell them that should they take one step against Nahida, you will meet them halfway. If they decide to send Sumeru to hell, they will have to go through you first. You will do everything you can to stop them, and if Sumeru falls then you fall with them.
They don't have to look at the others to make up their mind. There's a beat of silence but first it's Morax, and Beelzebul and Barbatos and then Focalor, and they are on their knees, heads bowed low.
It is only right to show respect to their god, after all. How could they be so blind?
Validation of their actions comes soon after as you let go of Nahida's hand and tell the Wanderer to stand aside. You do something that tyrant of a Creator that sits on a glass throne would never - you kneel before them and hold out your hand.
"Why are you all kneeling? Stand up. I am no longer your god. But I hope you will have me as a friend. Will that be alright?"
There are tears in their eyes as they let out stuttering laughter. Yes, this is their god. Their god with so much love and compassion and a heart that does nothing but bleed for them. A heart that does not ask for them to bleed.
You are their god. You are their true Creator. Golden blood be damned. All that gold has done nothing but blind them.
Eventually, you all end up on the forest floor. You accept the role of a friend as promised, and catch up with them. The Archons are almost in tears as you listen to their stories earnestly, squeezing their hands in sympathy as you listen to the pain they've been through under the rule of their so called Creator (they really should find a new title for you, the god that sits on your throne has sullied your rightful name). At one point they stop telling you stories of their mistreatment, unable to see your face be any sadder than it already was. They take to retelling your stories together, reminiscing better days - because is that not what they have done all this time? Think about the lovely you for every wrongdoing the other god had done in your name?
As you laugh and smile with them and their stories and their company, the idea burrows through their mind without your knowledge, taking root, and they refuse to let it go. Wouldn't it be so much better if it was always like this? Seeing your smiling face with them, a person that deserves to be called a god even more so than all of them combined. Knowing you were safe from harm, not having to defend yourself, especially from them under orders from a tyrant. Knowing you loved them the way they loved you.
It was all better with you.
When you weren't looking, the Archons gave each other knowing looks and curt nods in understanding.
You are their beloved Creator.
As a peaceful silence falls over you, they watch as you smile sadly, their hearts breaking to see such an expression on your face. In a soft voice, you apologize for not being able to do much to help them. When you lift your head, golden resolute eyes meet yours.
"You’ve done enough, Your Grace. Let us handle the rest."
You may have laughed at the old title, but the Archons are hell bent in returning it to you. Although it hurts them to say goodbye, they know it’s only for the moment. Soon, you will be with them. Back in your rightful throne, as you have always deserved.
Nahida is the youngest, and so they decide to spare her the carnage. The rest know she is no fool, they don't need to tell her what they had planned for her to know what happens next. She does not fully agree in the others' decision, yet she stays in Sumeru, promising to make sure you do not find out. Word travels fast to the other vision holders in the form of a breeze from Barbatos. Barely anyone had disagreed with the notion of removing the rejected god from the throne, and those who were hesitant at first changed their mind after hearing how you were ready to go down with Sumeru. Morax and the Tsaritsa lead the rebellion.
A god is only as powerful as the people who worship them. By the time the Archons arrived in the throne room, the Creator had no one to hide behind.
They made it a spectacle. They spin a tale for the people that the god they so worshiped was an impostor who had switched bodies with their rightful god, which explains the gold blood that should be yours. They say you were patiently waiting for them all to come back to you, to remove this impostor from your throne. You were ready to accept them all, they just needed to get rid of this filth that dared destroy your name. The Creator - no, the Impostor - is horrified when the people accept this story so easily, but they only have themselves to blame. Who cares what they have to say to defend themselves, although it’s not like they can anyway - how can they when their tongue was cut off?
Teyvat was silent as gold painted the streets of Liyue Harbor. Teyvat no longer cares for golden blood, not after all the blood and tears it had taken from its people. After all, a golden soul stands ready to take back their rightful place.
Your followers thought it had all been worth it - the pain, the hardships, the blood - to see you smile the first time you set foot outside Sumeru after what felt like years to them. And yet, despite the joyous occasion, you hesitantly turn to them and ask a question not even Irminsul would answer you.
"What happened to the Creator?"
You would be lying if you said the soft smiles each of them gave did not unnerve you as they all said the same thing, like a joke everyone knew all except you.
"We simply removed the Impostor from Your Grace's presence."
They are thankful that you are blinded by your love for them to see the gold shine on their hands. You do not ask about the shimmering streets either. Liyue was the city of gold after all, was it not?
For now, their biggest concern is your acceptance that they are your equal, but that can easily be fixed. You are their friend now, but someday you’ll be their god again. Slowly but surely. They will sit you back in your throne. They will kneel before you again. They will give you the reverence you so deserved.
It will all be yours.
You're their wonderful Creator, after all. Maybe not to you right now. But you always have been for them.
They’ll start from calling you Your Grace. You’d be too kind to tell them off over and over.
You always had been good at adapting.
You had gotten used to it then, you’ll get used to it again.
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✨ Masterlist ✨ 
Taglist: 💛@anime-allover  💛@faeriessky  💛 @prksolon 💛 @dai-tsukki-desu
Disclaimer: Characters are not mine and belong to their respective creators. Their portrayal is merely my own interpretation of them and may not be accurate to their intended characterization. I stake no claim to the original works, only to the ideas and plot of the fictitious stories I’ve written them into.
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cheriladycl01 · 19 days
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I need to go! No you need to race! - Max Verstappen x SwedishOlympicHockey! Reader
Plot: You get hurt during a hockey match at the Nationals and Mad Max makes a return for all the right reasons!
Credit to mverstappenn for the GIF
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Usually yours and Max's timetable linked up, you'd be training or doing your tournaments from Monday to Wednesday which Max would join you on before you left in his jet with him to wherever his race was that weekend.
But this week you had a national tournament which was on a Saturday, Sunday where Max was in the world. It was race day for him, and he was using one of the televisions to watch your tournament being streamed.
He couldn't understand any of it, where it was in Swedish so he just watched on with some of the mechanics who knew you and were rooting for you.
It was a good game and you guys were winning, absolutely tearing up the hockey field of the stadium you guys were in. Every time you scored, everyone watching cheered and Max had a big grin on his face when it zoomed in on your face yelling in a smile.
He always found it funny when you smiled as you wore a mouth guard that made your cheeks look puffy.
But things took a turn, it was about 20 minutes until the end of your game and an hour before the race started. All the mechanics were crowed around the TV watching until one of the girls in the opposing team swung their stick up, just as another tripped you up causing the base of the stick to smash into your face.
Max's hand came up to cover his mouth and 'oooooo's' flowed around from the mechanics realizing what just happened.
"Is she okay?" one of them said.
"I could hear something break!" another admitted.
Max watched as a few girls helped you to stand, but it was hard your nose was streaming blood down your face and the knock had clearly made you a little fuzzy.
Max was frowning gripping his fists as he watched the girl who hit you argue with the ref and medics who came out. She was pretty much shouting while you held your nose to try and stop the blood flow coming out.
You were escorted off the pitch and Max immediately went to his phone hounding you with messages asking if you were okay.
When that didn't work he proceeded to blow up your fathers phone who had been at the match in person and would be with you, which also didn't work.
He was so caught up with trying to get in contact with you that he didn't see Christian come up to him.
"Max?" Christian asks tentatively having heard what happened from the mechanics.
"I need to go!" Max exclaims looking up still having no word from your family on how you are doing.
"No, you need to race!" Christian says looking to his watch which showed it wasn't long before he needed to get in the car.
"I can't get in contact with her though, and what if something happens when I'm racing and she needs me!" he admits angrily raising his voice at his team principle.
"Max, calm down!" Christian says, his voice going a little gruffer.
"NO! I need to know shes okay!" he shouts and everyone can tell he's getting madder by the second. He only ever got like this when he was younger and someone crashed into him, he didn't have as well a hold on his emotions back then than he did now. But that was slowly slipping.
He was arguing back and forth with Christian until his phone rang. It was your contact number.
He didn't answer straight away frozen in shock from your number being up there.
"Schat?" he asks as he holds his phone to his ear.
"läckerbit" you tease knowing he hated that nickname.
"Are you okay?" he asks and you can tell he's worried from the tense and strain in his voice.
"Focus on the race, I'm fine and you'll see me soon" you smile into the phone making loads of kissy noises to him before he sighs nodding. You reassure him before you hang up turning to the nurse who was coming back with the x-rays of you nose.
"Yeah, it's definitely broken!" she sighs showing you making ou sigh too.
"Oooo and you have a mild concussion!" she smiles kindly making you laugh a little.
After the race and his podium, Max rushed as quickly as his jet provided to get to the hospital in Sweden you were being helped in.
He tried to sleep on the flight but was far too nervous to the point where he was pacing up and down the free walkway in the middle of the jet until the airhost made him take a seat handing him a beer to calm his nerves.
When he arrived to your private room in the hospital to see you scrolling through your phone he didn't fully take in your appearance at first.
He didn't note the greasy hair, or the bags under your eyes or the stuff helping fix your nose.
"Hey Schat!" he sighs and your head snaps up you look at him in disgust and shock.
"No! Don't look at me!" you cry pulling his hoodie up over you head and face to cover everything. And he couldn't help but laugh at your reaction. Hiding from him as if he hadn't seen you at your worst.
"Why are you hiding from me Princess" he laughs coming over and sitting on the edge of the bed after having taking a picture of your embarrassment.
"Mmmmm i look awful!" you say peeking at him through the hood.
"I think you look beautiful, like always" he grins, kissing you cheek not wanting to risk kissing your lips and numbing his nose with yours.
y/user
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Liked by maxverstappen1 and redbullracing
y/user: This weekend in order between my hockey competition and Max’s race.
Image 1 - me and my girlie frejalarsson getting ready for battle (we had a national tournament)
Image 2 - Max at his race to me tacking a hockey stick to the face 😳 (my nose was bleeding pretty bad)
Image 3 - Max leaving after his race on Sunday to fly to me in Sweden to visit me in the hospital. (I looked awful and was embarrassed)
Image 4 - going with Max to Monaco to get cuddles from Jimmy and Sassy
It’s been eventful to say the least!
Tagged 2 People
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redbullracing: get well soon y/n!
maxverstappen1: now I know how you feel when I get into a crash! Scariest moment of my life! So glad you are okay! 🥰
-> y/user: Love you Käresta 🤭🫶🏼
landonorris: get well soon y/n! Need you in the club asap 🍾🎈
-> y/user: i broke my nose Lando …
-> landonorris: so you can’t party with a broke nose? LAME!
-> maxverstappen1: I’m breaking your nose next buddy if you aren’t careful ❗️
-> landonorris: 😦
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Instagram Story Caption: Lego Date 🧱
Taglist:
@littlesatanicassholebitch @hockey-racing-fubol @laura-naruto-fan1998 @22yuki @simxican @sinofwriting @lewisroscoelove @cmleitora @daemyratwst @lauralarsen @the-untamed-soul l @thewulf @itsjustkhaos @purplephantomwolf @chasing-liberosis @summissss @gulphulp @starfusionsworld @jspitwall @sierruhhhh @georgeparisole @youcannotcancelquidditch @tallbrownhairsarcastic @ourteenagetragedy @peachiicherries @formulas-bitch @cherry-piee @spilled-coffee-cup @mehrmonga @bigsimperika @blueberry64857959 @eiraethh @lilypadlover @curseofhecate @alliwantisadonut @dark-night-sky-99 @i-wish-this-was-me @tallrock35 @butterfly-lover @barnestatic @landossainz @darleneslane @barcelonaloverf1life @r0nnsblog @ilove-tswizzle @laneyspaulding19 @malynn @viennakarma @landosgirlxoxo @marie0v @yourbane @teamnovalak @nikfigueiredo @fionaschicken @0picels0 @seomako @urdad-hot @tinydeskwriter @ironmaiden1313 @splaterparty0-0 @formula1mount @styl1shl1v
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yesimwriting · 1 year
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Pulling Away
A/n did i write smut for once? yeah. also timeline wise is this perfectly accurate? it’s iffy,, but this fic isn’t about the plot too much so it’s okay
Summary: You’re not the only one that’s feeling a little territorial thanks to the influx of people you’re around in Jackson. 
warnings: 18+, implied age gap, no condom, a tiny bit manipulative if you squint, brief mention of losing virginity.
----
He’s not a force of nature, no matter how hard he might pretend to be for the sake of those around him. Joel can’t actually change anything. So the shift in temperature you feel as Joel stills has to be a byproduct of what’s in your head. 
The kind of burning cold that better fits a fever runs through you and you hate yourself for it. This isn’t the first time you’ve been delusional when it comes to him. 
You’re working off of a quarter of his face against low lighting. It doesn’t make sense for you to be able to feel so much from the little of him that you can see. It’s not anger. Or at least, not just that. There’s definitely a subdued rage radiating from him, but it’s undercut by something that punches you straight in the gut. 
Maybe you’re being a little unfair, but you have a right to it at this point. You can’t follow him around blindly like some kind of puppy forever. Especially now that you’re both settled enough to be able to think of things outside of pure survival.
“Ellie’s asleep.” A flat observation that you can’t explain. Maybe it’s the need to break the silence, or maybe it’s a genuine attempt at making things feel normal. You two should still be able to talk. You never wanted that to end. “Swore she wasn’t tired, but passed out as soon as her head touched the mattress.” 
Joel lets out a small sound from the back of his throat. It’s a spike in the atmosphere. “Think I’m gonna go to bed, too.” You don’t understand your awkwardness or the urge to create distance. It’s not like Joel would hurt you, but then again, the buzz of adrenaline doesn’t seem to be coming from a place of fear. It’s an uneasy burning that worsens when you raise your eyes enough to meet his. “Night.” 
The one word is a little better and somehow so much worse. Not aggressive or trying to make things better. It’s just there. Civil. 
When he says nothing, you take it as your sign to call it a night. Tomorrow could be better. Sure, your rocky dynamic might be going through growing pains while you set boundaries that should have been established long ago, but you’ll likely survive this. You’re all staying together in the same house in Jackson for the time being and you both care too much about Ellie to separate over something small. 
Even if Joel won’t directly admit to it, the part of your relationship that feels like co-parenting is sacred. That’s part of the reason why the feelings you’ve been fighting with yourself to dismantle are so complicated. He cares about Ellie more than he wants to admit and the last thing you need right now is to tear away the little stability she’s finally been given. Not over a few awkward conversations and stiff moments. 
The weird irony that vaguely reflects the issues of the world before isn’t lost on you. If someone were to squint at the situation, you’d seem like a wife trapped in a marriage for the sake of her children. Maybe if it was happening to someone else you’d have enough energy to find it funny. 
You turn carefully, like a too loud squeak of your shoes could be what snaps the thinning thread tying you two to a hint of casualness. You don’t need to pass him to get to where you’re sleeping. The three of you had been set up in a space that allowed for each person to have their own room. It’s like that in theory, but in practice it’s more like Ellie’s room, Joel’s room, and the spare. 
A comfortable enough bedroom that you’ve maybe spent the entire night alone in twice in the weeks you’ve been here. You can’t even pretend that you keep the few things you own in there either. Joel’s an even lighter traveler than you, so slowly your items made their way into the drawers in his room. Now, your room is basically just where you go to change into and out of sleepwear.
You’ll get used to it, used to the draft that originally led to you giving up on rocky sleep the first night you ended up sleeping next to Joel. Your dreams kept you up even more than the cold, but when Joel’s drowsy voice called out to you in the dark, asking why you were awake, you blamed the night’s chill. That’s how it first happened. 
It was a mistake you should have never let turn into habit. You’re correcting it now. Setting boundaries to prevent heartbreak. It’s only a matter of time considering the way the women here look at him.
“Since when do you sleep in there?”
His voice is so gruff it instinctually freezes you. Any sarcastic comment at the back of your throat vanishes immediately. The both of you are fully aware of how you end up each night, but it’s a boundary in itself not to mention it. You’re not sure if it’s more him or you, but what happens at night and early in the morning is never mentioned.
It’s a dip into another reality. A space where Joel’s a little lighter, almost more open. Sometimes he’ll drag your arm with him when he moves onto his side, a silent way of asking you to stay close. On the best nights, he’ll joke about it, letting your limbs meld together under a blanket and swear he’s just trying to keep you warm out of the kindness of his heart. 
His humor is the worst. The kind that some might justify as a result of years of it being at a stalemate for years considering the tragic state of the world, but you know better. They’re the kind of jokes that take a second to settle because of his general exterior, but are meant to be so dumb they force out a smile. In another life, the little comments are dad jokes.
The peace bleeds into the mornings now, he’ll keep the closeness and remind you that you don’t have to get up immediately by mumbling something about Ellie still being asleep. Like she’s the only thing significant enough to get you two to return to reality. 
You’re convinced that these moments exist because neither of you mention them. He’s crossing a line you didn’t realize meant so much to you and he’s being dramatic it, too. It’s not the rarest thing for you to ‘attempt’ to sleep in your own bed. Sure, you’re more likely to lay in that room for a few hours on nights where Ellie stays up a little later, but this isn’t the strangest thing you’ve done. 
He’s ripping any chance of returning to that separate world away from you. It stings more than it should. “Thought I’d give it a try,” you voice is too low, too defensive, “It’s not a big deal.” 
The defense sounds so weak in your own ears, you don’t even want to imagine what he took from it. “Bullshit.”
His voice comes out in such a low huff you feel it more than hear it. If the sound had felt any less dangerous, you would have pretended to mistake it for another wordless grunt. Your lips part slowly as your mind struggles to create any kind of logical response. 
Pretending is clearly getting you nowhere. The only reason you ever pretended it would was pure delusion. Joel has always been able to see through you, through any shift in mood. Even when your lies are better, his ability to sense them is uncanny. 
He turns with no warning. Joel crosses the space between you before you can even fully register his steps. Your body tenses as heat rushes to your face in result of an oddly charged parody of fight or flight. You almost step back, one heel shifting back, but then you meet his gaze and the determined glint behind his eye is enough to melt you into place. 
There’s something else there, too. A focus that pins you into place even further. Holds you there better than the barrel of a pistol could. 
The absurdity of the warmth rooted in your chest should be enough to make the feeling go away. It doesn’t, so you force your lips to part again. You need to say something. Anything. “Joel?” Not that. Not just his name in a voice that feels violently small. 
“You’re pullin’ away.” 
The accusation in his voice leaves no room for argument. You try anyways, “No.” The rest of your thoughts can’t come out while you’re looking at him at the same time. There’s shame in dropping your gaze to focus on your shoes and the little space between you. “It’s not like that.” 
Joel lets out a low sound. The creak of the floor as he steps forward again snaps you out of your trance. You step back in a desperate attempt to keep the space between the two of you equal. Your back hits the wall before you can come close to achieving your goal. It’s a knee jerk reaction that leaves your face feeling even warmer than before. A part of you expects Joel to laugh at the sound or at least comment on it. He doesn’t. He continues forward until his mouth is so close to your ear the warmth of his breath lingers when he exhales. 
He takes a second there, relishing in your stillness. “Don’t lie to me.” Joel pulls away just enough to look you in the eye. “You don’t want to talk to me, you’re talkin’ about leavin’.” The southern drawl of his voice is increasing with his frustration. It’s distracting in a way that feels too convenient. Like he’s doing this on purpose. 
You swallow once. “You found your brother. I have a sister out there, I’d--I think now that things are more settled with Ellie it wouldn’t be the worst thing for me to look for her.” 
“And you don’t want us goin’ with you, but you’re more than willing to let the guy that’s always lookin’ at you--” 
“Oh my god, is that what this is about?” You are insane. Of course his issue is who mentioned it. John knows travel, leaves Jackson and comes back in one piece when he needs to. He wouldn’t be the worst person to have with you if you did want to start a rudimentary search for your sister. “I didn’t make any plans with John, it just came up.” 
“You don’t want us goin’ with you.” 
Your throat feels dry. The thought of it makes you feel cold. You haven’t seen your sister in a few years and so much has changed. You’re no longer in the QZ and your sister has no way of knowing that. She can’t reach out if there’s trouble or good news and she has no reason to assume that you’re safe. You know where she lives, and if she’s not there, you know a few of her usual spots. She doesn’t typically stray too far from her bubble. It wouldn’t be a long trip, just long enough. 
Long enough to give you some space. Long enough to remember what it’s like to not be around Joel all the time. Long enough to feel less about him. 
And you’d come back. You wouldn’t just walk out of his life and Ellie’s forever. The little bit of space you’re trying to get would make it easier for you to stick around in the long run because it’s the only way you can think to get rid of the feelings that are trying to ruin everything. 
“We haven’t been here that long and Ellie’s finally starting to feel settled. I don’t want to drag her out of that yet and make her feel like her entire life is just going to be her being dragged around the country.” 
Your words are a jumble, rushed together in a way that makes the honesty of them less effective. It’s a good point. Ellie just called her room hers the other day and even asked about moving the bed against a different wall.
Joel lets out a low breath, eyes hardening. “You’re right. She’s settlin’ and she needs you.” He knows he’s hit his mark when you don’t respond. “How do you think she’s gonna take the news that you’re leaving?” 
“Leaving to visit my sister.” You struggle to swallow. “Temporarily. It’ll take less than two weeks.” 
His lips pull into a frown as his eyebrows together. Moody and brooding. The look you’ve openly referred to as his old man scowl. “With John.” 
Ugh. This again. Why does it matter? Yes, John will be there, but it’s not like it’s just you and John. Your sister isn’t that far and she has access to supplies that aren’t common, she has an understanding with people that have easy access to medical supplies. 
But even if it was just you and John, it doesn’t matter. There are a lot of areas in which you factor in Joel’s opinion, but this is definitely not one of them. You two aren’t together and with the way he does nothing to show any discontent when the girls here start to look at him, he definitely doesn’t need you keeping his bed warm at night. 
“If I go, he wouldn’t be the only one there.” The fact that you’re trying to justify John’s presence leaves a bitter taste in your mouth. You’re a grown woman, free to associate with whoever you want. You might jokingly call him your old man from time to time, but he has no right. “And if even if he was, what does it matter?” 
His jaw locks and the downwards tilt of his chin erases the little bit of confidence you’ve managed to build. “You’ve seen the way that boy looks at you.”
You have to bite your tongue to avoid from blurting out that he’s also seen the way majority of the women you see on a daily basis look at him. Joel’s also exaggerating. John does not have any feelings for you, and if he did, it wouldn’t matter. It’s not like you see John as anything more than a friend. But even if you did--it is not his business. At all. 
“He doesn’t.” There’s little point in saying that, Joel’s not one to have his mind so easily swayed and he’s been wary of John since the beginning. Sometimes it even feels like the more you insist that he’s a good friend, the more Joel seems to dislike him. “And if he did, it doesn’t matter.” 
Your words feel like a retreat they shouldn’t need to be. Small, the meaning of the sentence compacted and straining against the limited syllables. A part of you expects Joel to understand what you do mean. That it doesn’t matter because it takes two interested parties to form any kind of relationship. That your mind isn’t even there in terms of feeling safe...that the only person who has ever made you feel safe enough to imagine anything beyond friendship is right in front of you. 
For the first time, Joel doesn’t pick up on the relevance of what isn’t said. You can feel his lack of understanding in the way he moves, placing one hand on the wall, near your head. You blink, trying in vain to explain the motion, explain his proximity. He’s caging you in. 
The heat of his body is practically inescapable, amplified by the way he smells. Joel showered a little earlier, his natural scent combining pleasantly with that of plain soap. After so many nights next to him, you would think you would have developed a tolerance. You haven’t. And even if you did, you doubt it’d matter...this is different. Dizzying. 
“Doesn’t matter?” 
He’s somehow even closer and somehow not touching you. The realization that that’s the worst part of this leaves your stomach fluttering. You need the feeling gone, so you force out the first words that come to mind, “It matters as much as all the girls that look at you like that.” 
It feels more bitter than it comes out, leaving a metallic taste on your tongue. You need out. You need space. You need sleep. Joel’s silence feels like opportunity, so as subtly as you can you try to shift away from the wall. Your back is off the wall for less than a second before you’re pushed back against it. 
Your body hits the wall before you can realize that Joel’s hand is on your hip. There’s too much surprise for that fact to settle, so you look up at him almost bewildered. You expect him to let go or at least look somewhat apologetic. He does the opposite, moving the hand on the wall under your jaw and closing the distance between you in a motion so quick you can barely register it. 
His mouth is on yours before your mind can catch up. It makes no difference to him. He’s rabid in his patience, taking what he wants without forcing your lips to part. His hand squeezes your hip and all at once it connects. You gasp and Joel pins you to the wall even more securely, deepening the kiss with an expert’s ease. 
It lasts until you can’t breathe and ends with his teeth grazing against your bottom lip as he pulls away. “All of this,” the words are exhaled lowly, “’Cause you’re jealous.” 
The kiss left you so light headed your first instinct is to just agree. To not think and do or say whatever you need to in order to get him that close again. But his tone is too sure, too teasing, and the implication isn’t something he can just get away with. “Jealous?” His smugness is hard to take with him holding you against the wall like this. It’s too vulnerable, like this might be some kind of game to him. It makes you feel transparent. Hollow. “Fuck whoever you want, I don’t care.” 
It’s like you’ve said nothing until Joel has the audacity to squeeze your hip. “Whoever I want?” His hand shifts up your hip, your shirt moving with him. “Hm.” His hum settles beneath your skin, effectively silencing you as his eyes take their time raking over your face and down your body. “Those were some big words from you.” 
Heat rushes to your face. It’s ridiculous--you curse more than that on a regular basis. He’s playing into context, too aware of what he’s doing. The urge to push burns twice as hard as buzzing in your chest. “They’re true. We’re not--we’re not anything, so if I want to go with--” 
“I’m not losin’ you.” There’s a desperation in there that comes out so hard it circles back to vulnerable. “You wanna go see your sister, we go see your sister. That’s how we got through everything else.” The hand on your hip moves down, his fingers dipping beneath the elastic waistband of your shorts. You hate yourself a little for the way your breath audibly catches. “Understand?” 
His hand lowers even further, long fingers pressing against the fabric of your underwear. You’re not breathing right and you can’t bring yourself to care. The only thing you can think of is closer. “Y-yes.” 
“’Yes’ what?” No sympathy in his voice or anything that would give away that he has a hand shoed down your pants. 
His touch picks up pace, rubbing against you until a whimper escapes your lips. “Yes, sir.”
Joel moves his hand away with no warning. The whine that escapes your lips doesn’t feel like your own. He’s barely touched you and you’re already like this. “Barely touched you and you’re already listening.” He hooks two fingers in between the band of your underwear. “Should’ve done this awhile again, then.” 
You’re burning all over, the only thing you can manage is a quick, “Shut up.” It lacks any bite. 
He pulls at the band of our underwear, letting it snap back into place. If you didn’t know any better, you’d consider the flash of something softer across his face as amusement. “If you want me to stop, you’ve gotta tell me.” 
Your nod feels desperate. Your entire body feels desperate. For the way he kissed you, the way he touched you. “I-I’ll tell you.” He’s still not moving, not doing anything. It’s some sort of punishment. It has to be. “Joel...” 
“You going to say ‘please’?” 
You have half a mind to tell him to fuck off, but then his fingers hook around your underwear again. A promise. “Please, Joel.” This is all unfamiliar but you trust Joel to get what you want, what you need. “Need you.” 
With no warning, he yanks down your shorts and underwear. They fall down your legs and you blindly kick them to the side. “Need me?” He tilts his head down, pressing an open mouthed kiss against your cheek, then two to your jaw. “Need me where, sweetheart?” 
God. Anywhere. Everywhere. Your desperation reminds you of how incredibly unfair it is that you’re already down to just our t-shirt and Joel’s still fully dressed. You move your hand slowly, carefully tugging at whatever piece of clothing on him you can reach. 
He’s unimpressed. “C’mon, use your big girl words.” His hand is in between your thighs, his fingers teasing at your entrance in a way that makes it impossible to focus on anything else. “You were usin’ them just fine a second ago.” 
“Joel,” he kisses your jaw again, forcing away all train of thought. It has to be intentional. “Joel,” again, too soft. 
“I know,” he exhales the words against your neck, “I know, sweetheart. Need me to take care of you.” Joel doesn’t wait for a reaction, just pushes his fingers fully into you. You gasp too loudly, Joel moves his free hand over your mouth. “Be a good girl and be quiet. Can’t wake up Ellie.” 
Shit. How did you not think of that? “You’ll be good and quiet for me? Let me stretch you out a bit first?” There’s a knot in your stomach that’s slowly taking over all of your senses. As long as Joel keeps working at it, you could promise him anything. You nod against the palm of his hand. 
You bite your tongue to keep from whimpering too loudly. “Need you to relax,” he presses into you even more firmly, “Get you ready for me.” 
He slowly eases his hand off of your face. “Joel, please.” You’re not even sure what you’re asking for, you just know you need more. You want him to consume you entirely. Feel him until he’s all there is.
You hear the sound of a belt buckle and his jeans shifting. Instinctually, you move a hand towards him, wanting to help, wanting to feel him. “There’ll be time for that, right now it’s about you.” You’re about to argue when he skillfully adds another finger. Fuck. “You’re tight,” he breathes, “No one’s ever touched you here?” 
His fingers curl inside of you and you have to burry your face into the fabric of his shirt to keep from crying out. “Only you.” 
“Look who’s found her manners.” He’s picking up the pace and smoothing down your hair as you squirm against him. “Should’ve done this sooner.” Just as the coil in your lower stomach tightens, Joel takes his hand back. 
You push yourself off of him, staring at him with an expression you know he’ll consider pouting. “Why’d you--” 
“Because I want you to remember this.” He pushes you back to the wall, pressing his body against you. The head of his cock brushes against your entrance. With no warning, he pushes into you. Your sharp gasp overlaps with Joel’s low groan. “Y’need a man to fuck the attitude out of you.” He moves slowly, the friction unbelievably overwhelming and somehow not enough. “That boy wouldn’t know what to do with you.” 
Joel presses you further into the wall, sinking into you as deep as possible before pulling out just to sink back in. His pace is even until his breathing picks up. You’re a mess against him, hiding your face in his chest when he starts fucking you with full force.
“You’re squeezing me so good.” Joel practically pants the words into your skin. “Fuck, ‘m going to--you gonna finish with me, sweetheart?” 
Your mind is mush, you can barely nod against him as his thrusts start to lose their focus. You’re pushed over the edge as Joel’s teeth graze against your neck. He pulls at your orgasm, dragging it along until your legs are jelly and he’s pulling out in order to not finish inside you. 
The two of you stay holding onto each other for what feels like a long time and not enough. “You’re not goin’ anywhere, okay?”
You pull your head off of him enough to look him in the eye. “Not without you.” 
He smiles, lines that you can imagine kissing forever etching themselves into his skin. “That’s my girl.” Joel runs a hand up and down your back fondly. “Let’s go to bed,” he presses a kiss against your jaw, “Give me the space to properly appreciate you.”
The thought makes your body burn all over again. “You sure you aren’t tired out, old man?” 
Joel huffs out what’s almost a laugh, “We’ll see who’s tiring who out, sweetheart.” 
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sketchalicious · 9 months
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doomed au timeline thing? idrk
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uhh okay so . i saw that the doomed au kinda popped off n i figured i'd go into a bit more depth for fun so i doodled out this crappy comic thing. i think i saw a homestuck comic do something similar LOL.
im gonna give like. aftermath of the ninja's deaths and such for the sake of clarity , since i know this is just an angsty clusterbump.
Kai: The real ignition for Lloyd's downfall. The staff was destroyed moments before the transformation ritual by the green ninja himself. In Lloyd's mind, his friend would return to normal. But he was met with something else as Kai desperately took the shards and ran away instead, too far gone into his ego and insanity. Returning home they remain the same in quantity, with Lloyd and Nya heartbroken, and Zane blaming himself.
Cole: He acted as the stable rock of the group. He brought the ninja back to their high spirits again, acting as a replacement flame for Kai to reunite his team. He even began the trend of looking for the missing ninja, with hope they were still out there. Yet despite being the very reason they stabilized, no one seemed to realize he disappeared. Instead they suddenly felt lost, like they were missing something. The grief returned, and the dots never connected.
Zane: His disappearance set the team on course for failure. With him, Asphera never explained where she had banished him, and the others were left to believe he was really, truly gone this time. He acted as the caretaker for the group, tying them together once more as he tried to bring back the joy they lost through menial tasks and the small details of the world. Even back to when Kai disappeared, Lloyd could be a leader with his help. With the last light in the tunnel gone, no one had any more confidence to step up.
Nya: Jay and Lloyd's breaking point. Without her, they lost their drive to keep searching. Her disappearance plays the same as canon, becoming one with the sea. Though she was less hesitant now, understanding that this was just fate, that the team wasn't meant to survive. If that was the case, she'll go out with a bang, knowing that with her gone they would understand too. At least she knew they would be safe for now.
Lloyd: His disappearance happened long after he recognized his Oni form. After having to fight the overlord alone, he went on a downwards spiral. Jay couldn't be there, and frankly, Wu couldn't get through to him like Garmadon did. Lloyd hated the idea of fate. He felt too, like Nya, that the team wasn't meant to last. As such, in his last effort to feel control, he caved into what came easy.
Pixal: Like Zane did in canon after Nya, she turned off her emotion meter. She knew some of the ninja could be saved, and she knew she had to stop grieving in order to even try. In a frustrated effort, she attempted to bring the ninja to her level, only to blame herself for Lloyd's snap. After realizing she couldn't do much for a grieving Jay, she leaves to find the others.
Jay: Who knows where he is. Wu entered his quarters to find only a pair of nunchaku, and his gi laying on his pillow. Maybe he joined Pixal, maybe he existed as a criminal like Lloyd now. All Wu knew is he lost his last student and the last defender of Ninjago. It's likely Jay quit, afraid of becoming next in fate's cruel hand. He'd only learn after the merge.
okay thats it lmao. i might add more ideas in the future but im not creative enough to plot it out properly gO NUTS
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agendabymooner · 6 months
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SOMETHING DESIRED !!! TOTO W. X FEM!READER (18+)
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summary: "don't mix business with pleasure" they said, but who were they to stop her and toto from wanting each other?
content warning: smut under the cut (minors dni!), based on a request from my ask, use of explicit language, rbr test driver!horner!reader (christian's sister), forbidden love trope-ish, porn with plot, unprotected sex (plz don't do that), office sex, lowk filthy, size kink (heavy on this), choking, dacryphilia
song rec: now by trouble maker
note: this is the closest thing you'll ever have to a fic where a horner and a wolff banged. enjoy xx
something sinful (smut) masterlist
a - n masterlist
o - z masterlist
if you’d like to get on one of my taglists, check this post out
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she wanted him. and he wanted her too. he just refused to let his desires give in to save face.
and she hated it so much. she hated that she saw him as someone else’s younger sister and nothing else. 
she hated that she was even related to christian horner of all people. she usually didn’t care about christian— she had no reason to dislike him as he’d been nothing but a caring brother. she just hated that toto wolff saw her as nothing but an extension to christian’s surname. 
she supposed that’s what would happen as she entered the motorsports industry later than he did. it wasn’t her fault that christian was twenty years older than her.
it wasn’t his fault either. but to be told that you were off limits to every single man in the grid and every team? she loathed her brother so much.
because amongst those men that christian horner had warned, the mercedes amg team principal became the subject of her interest— and her desire for him grew as her brother and toto wolff became friends outside of their teams. 
“you don’t have to mix business with pleasure,” she almost scoffed when christian told her about his friendship with toto.
how hypocritical, she thought, because even i’m not allowed to see drivers or staff outside of business hours for ‘pleasurable’ reasons. 
at the age of 30, many would’ve expected her to be shackled to some man outside of the industry— probably married to him with a child. 
yet here she was, a single woman whose title as a test driver for red bull racing expired a few weeks ago. she appreciated the opportunity given by her brother— the team principal, really. but the longer she worked for his team the longer his big brother act would prevent her from wanting anyone. 
and if christian told her that she couldn’t have anyone, then he too couldn’t have her intelligence that helped bring his team to success.
and when the rumours of her contract’s expiration went around the pit lane— every team scouted her. after all, this horner was an important asset to red bull’s success for this season and the season ahead of them.
she could’ve accepted scuderia ferrari’s offer. amongst the desperate teams that rolled the red carpet for her, the scarlet team offered her a large sum of money. they wanted her knowledge in car development as much as they wanted her expertise in driving. 
yet she didn’t choose the money. instead, she found herself sitting across from the mercedes team principal. why?
“you’ve been looking well,” toto started, his eyes trained on her as he spoke, “did your brother’s team stress you out that much?” 
“being in that team is stressful, alright,” she scoffed, earning a deep chuckle from toto as she continued, “30 years old and i’m still being treated like i’m sixteen. all they wanted was my brain— yet my brother kept me on a tight leash as if i didn’t know any better outside this industry.” 
“so now you’ve decided to let your contract expire,” toto said with a nod of understanding. “he can’t do so much about it. you’re a free woman.”
“i’ve always been,” she gave him a grim smile and quipped, “all the men in our business just refused to believe that because of who my brother was.”
“you were a younger woman,” toto said with a gulp, “it was only right of christian to protect you like he did.”
“and five years later, i’ve grown,” she bit back.
“you are still his younger sister,” toto reasoned. he knew where the younger horner was getting at here. 
there was an unspoken agreement between the two that they wanted each other. they’ve agreed on it during dinners, during their family vacations and during those days when toto wolff was invited into christian’s home and she was there too.
they’ve always agreed on it. yet toto was letting her down like this— like the agreement should remain unspoken and unheard of. 
“are you seriously going to let his stupid mouth and his whole big brother act dictate what you want, toto?” she asked with a hint of irritation in her tone. “i’m not christian— and he’s not me because he doesn’t know how much you fucking want me. and i do. i do understand.” 
“i allowed myself a couple of months— months to decide on whether or not i was going to stay in his team,” she continued. “i could’ve signed before the season was over but i didn’t. because this gives me the chance to work with your team— to work with you.”
“this,” she pointed at the contract in front of her. “gives me the chance to make you realize that i’m not just an extension to your friend’s name. that your feelings for me shouldn’t be deterred by your friendship with my brother— who i want nothing to do with because it’s not his life that’s being put on hold. it’s mine.”
she let out a heavy sigh and chuckled humourlessly. “but i suppose we shouldn’t mix business with pleasure.”
he merely stared at her as she stood up. she flashed him a smile as if she hadn’t just gone off and berated him for listening too much to christian. 
then she said, “i’ll come back next week. i’m expecting the contract agreement to be modified by then so we can finalize the deal.”
yeah, who the fuck was christian for him to dictate who she wanted and who toto wanted? 
the door slammed shut as she turned around, the gap between her and toto was little to nothing as his breath fanned across her face. he dipped his head and captured her lips in a lustful kiss. 
she almost moaned at the feeling of his tongue tangling with hers. her body burned in desire as she craved for more. 
toto wanted more too, and she could tell that by the way he ravaged her without hesitation. 
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his office at the factory was filled with nothing but silent screams and sounds of low growl and skin slapping. everybody had left hours before she arrived at the factory. 
thankfully the mercedes staff wouldn’t have to hear their employer fucking the most scouted talent at the pit lane right now— and even if they did, it was in their best interest to keep their mouth shut about it. 
but toto and the woman couldn’t find themselves to care at the moment, both were too drawn to each other as toto’s cock thrusted into her deeply. 
she held into the leather couch and cried quietly, tears threatening to fall from the pleasure that she felt when his cock continued to rub against the sensitive spot that nestled inside her cunt. 
“fuck, schatz,” toto hissed from behind her, pulling her back against his chest as he wrapped his hand around her neck and squeezed it lightly. she gasped, catching the last of her breath before he let go and kept his hand around her. 
then his other hand took hers and placed her palm flat against her stomach, making her squirm and moan. “do you feel that, liebling? that’s my cock. such a filthy girl- wanting a big cock inside this little pussy of hers,” he chuckled darkly as he continued to fuck her.
she loved the feeling of it— his cock buried in her cunt while he manhandled her body. the constant protrusion in her stomach drove her wild. she had always known that toto was taller and bigger than most— she just hadn’t expected to crave for more when she felt her lower stomach bulging as he fucked her. 
“so desperate f’me,” he muttered, bottoming out inside of her as she whined. her whining subsided when he squeezed her throat again.
“ah shit~” she gasped breathlessly, feeling the pressure around her neck increasing as her eyes rolled back in pleasure. 
“so fucking tight,” toto grunted in her ear, nipping on it as he continued to fuck her relentlessly. “is this what i’ve been missing out on, then? your desperation for me and for my cock, hm?”
and when his grip loosened, she let out a sigh and quietly whimpered, “yes— wanted your cock so bad, toto.”
“you’ve got it now, schatz,” he muttered, moaning at her walls throbbing around him as he continued, “i fucked my cock at the thought of you, you know? wanted to fuck you so bad as much as you wanted me.”
“stroked my cock when you wore those short dresses,” he taunted, earning a whimper from her as she continued to listen to his filthy words, “wishing it’s your hands. i could just hear your voice telling me how your hands couldn’t even wrap themselves around my cock- you are so small in comparison to me— i can’t believe this cunt of yours could even fit all of me.”
“toto, i- i,” she whined, “‘m- ah, hah~ ‘m gonna cum.”
“i know, liebling,” his thrusting became frantic as he chased his high and hers. “i can feel your cunt around me— you’re about to cum aren’t you?”
“mhm— toto pleaseee~” she cried out, “please cum inside me.”
“yeah? you want me to cum inside you?” he hummed in pleasure, “do you want me to fuck this pussy of yours ‘til you’re full of my cum?” 
“ye- yes, yes!” she exclaimed, mewling as she continued to plead, “‘s so- so good. so fucking good— please fill me up!” 
“how bad do you want it?” he could feel himself nearing his orgasm as well, but he couldn’t help himself. “tell me. how bad do you want it, liebling?”
“soooo bad~ god! toto,” she sobbed.
“it’s just me, liebling, there’s no need to call me god,” he chuckled one last time as he groaned loudly, feeling her spongy walls clenching around him as she let out a loud whine. “fuuuuck~ schatz, i’m gonna— oh fuck!” 
his cock twitched against her walls and painted them white, his thrusting slowing down as he let out a long sigh. 
pulling out of her, toto sat on the couch and observed her tear stained face with a smile. his large hand pulled her body on his lap, hearing her breath quiver as she gathered her composure.
“this better not be the last time, toto,” she whispered in his ear, wrapping her arms around his neck with a soft sigh. 
he chuckled quietly, “you’re working alongside me now, schatz. and you’re stuck with me outside of work. i know this isn’t the last time.” 
don’t mix business with pleasure? sure. 
after all, business brought stress. pleasure took the stress away. 
toto knew that she’d be able to handle both. he was nothing but proud of her. he couldn’t believe that this resilient woman finally became his. 
he wouldn’t let go of her that easily. not when he finally had her.
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♡ moony’s reminder 🅶 (general): @hiraethrhapsody @avaleineandafryingpan @topguncultleader @enhacolor
♡   moony’s reminder 🅴 (explicit edition): @glitterf1
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ashwhowrites · 5 months
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The mother of it all
Plot- Eddie finds himself crushing on his girlfriend's mom
⚠️Eddie is a perv! Fair warning. Eddie is legal (18) but the reader is 35, age gap relationship/sex
Extremely long....but I hope you guys enjoy it🫶🏻 I really loved writing this and I hope you guys love it 🤞🏻 I also gave up proofreading half way through so lets ignore mistakes
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Y/N went through a messy divorce, a husband who never loved her the way she needed. She felt alone in her marriage and craved to mean something to someone. Her daughter, Brittany was a daddy's girl. Brittany saw her dad with this sense of pride that Y/N never received. When Y/N asked for the divorce, Brittany turned on her. She couldn't see that her dad was the bad guy in it all, she tore Y/N apart and would never forgive her for being the reason their family broke apart.
Now Y/N was in her 30s, starting over in a world of dating. She met losers, creeps, cheaters, and everything under the moon. Except for a handsome man who has potential. She quit looking, she gave up on the idea that she'd fall in love again and that someone would fall for her.
That was until Brittany met a boy named Eddie Munson.
~~~
Eddie Munson was Brittany's boyfriend, their relationship was rocky. They fought constantly, then made up with sex. That was all the relationship was. Y/N could see there were no feelings on either side, it was just sexual tension. But Y/N would never say a word of that to her daughter. Brittany already hated her, giving relationship advice would cause a war. So Y/N let Brittany do what she wanted, but she felt bad for the poor boy. She wasn't sure why he still bothered to come around.
He came around for Y/N. The first time Eddie ever met Brittany's mom, he couldn't get her out of his head. Her sexy curves, her chest, her smile, and those eyes. She was gorgeous, effortlessly beautiful. Eddie was attracted to Brittany of course, but something about her mom called to Eddie even more. Maybe it was his mommy issues, the abandonment he felt growing up. Y/N provided everything for him when he was over. She cooked dinner, and she was an excellent chef. Not that Brittany would give her the credit. She refused to eat anything her mom made, yet Eddie sat down and had seconds. He didn't understand the toxic environment between the mother and daughter. He didn't understand how Brittany could be so cruel to Y/N.
He always felt a snap in his chest when Brittany brushed aside Y/N, the painful look in Y/N's eyes as she forced out a smile. He wanted to hold her, he wanted to kiss all the pain away. But he also wanted to drill his cock so deep inside her that she'd feel him in her stomach. He wanted to watch her tits bounce as she rode him. He wanted to feel her skin drenched in sweat and her cum smeared into his pubic hair. He was obsessed with Brittany's mom.
~~~
Another fight between Brittany and Y/N left Eddie awkwardly sitting in his girlfriend's room. He learned to block out their screams. He took his time walking around Brittany's room. His eyes catch all the photos, but none of Y/N. Eddie couldn't help but feel disappointed, he knew they would fight for hours. Then Brittany would come upstairs and they'd fuck her anger out.
Eddie slowly made his way across the hall, the sweet smell of Y/N's perfume filled his nose as he traveled into her room. He slowly closed the door behind him, signing in relief as it shut quietly. He walked quickly over to her dresser, he searched and searched until he found the lacy and silk lingerie. He felt his cock twitch in his jeans as he grabbed a red lacy thong. Eddie felt no shame as he brought the thong to his nose, inhaling the laundry detergent she used, but that tiny smell of her. He whimpered as he could feel his cock pulsing. He tucked the thong into his pocket and closed the dresser. He raced to the bathroom, quickly yanking down his jeans. He wrapped the thong around his cock, eagerly jerking off. He bit down on his lap as he fucked himself, he knew he had to be fast and quiet. He closed his eyes as he imagined her hands on him. Her nails scrape down his stomach, a smirk on her face as she teased the tip of his cock. Her mouth was on his neck, marking him as hers before she sank her wet cunt on him.
"LEAVE ME ALONE!" Brittany screamed, Eddie's eyes snapped open at the sound of her voice. He could hear her feet pounding up the stairs, he quickly tucked his cock back in his jeans, the thong in his back pocket as he washed his hands. He left the bathroom by the time Brittany made it to the top.
She growled and grabbed his hand. Eddie couldn't help but look down the stairs, Y/N stood there with fire in her eyes. He knew the pissed-off look was meant for Brittany, but he couldn't help but whimper. When she noticed his eyes on her, she let out a small smile. Eddie wanted to smile back but Brittany yanked him into her room.
~~~
"Wanna go out tonight?" Brittany asked, her hands moving up and down Eddie's chest as they sat in the cafeteria. It was a Friday and Eddie planned to sit in his room and work on his music. He wasn't much in the mood to listen to Brittany argue about something.
"Who's weekend is it?" He asked he crossed his fingers under the table.
"Dad. He's been asking to meet you. He doesn't know why you only go to my mom's." Brittany said, a small glare in her eyes. "Neither do I."
Eddie knew why.
"I can't, Wayne and I are going to a work thing." Eddie lied, shrugging his shoulders.
The second Eddie made it home, he thanked God Wayne was still at work. He stripped himself naked and dug in his nightstand. He felt around until he felt the thong, he grabbed it and slid it up his legs. He pulled it up until his cock was covered, he closed his eyes and pictured Y/N. He pictured his hands were hers as he trailed his fingertips down his chest, slowly moving down to his cock. He teased himself over the thong, enjoying the way the lace scratched against his sensitive skin. He moaned as he began to rub himself.
"Fuck, Ms. Y/N, that feels so good." He moaned. He rubbed himself until he felt that tight feeling in his stomach and until he came inside her underwear.
~~~
Eddie got excited as the new weekend came closer, knowing this weekend was Y/N's weekend. He agreed to whatever date Brittany wanted, his mind just on the fact he'd get to see her mom again.
"Eddie, nice to see you again," Y/N said politely, Eddie felt his mouth go dry as she leaned over the counter to scrub the table. He licked his lips as he checked out her ass in the leggings she wore.
"Don't talk to him." Brittany snapped, she yanked Eddie up to her room.
"She's just being nice," Eddie said as he stripped off his shirt, Brittany gagged and rolled her eyes as she unclipped her bra.
"She's not nice. She's just sucking up to you." Brittany argued. "But not talking about her, she'll kill the mood."
But Eddie disagreed, knowing he was going to picture Y/N under him as he brought Brittany to an orgasm.
~~~
"Should we get dinner?" Brittany asked as she got herself dressed. Eddie shrugged from the bed, lying in his boxers.
"We could eat here...maybe your mom is making dinner?" Eddie asked, Brittany glared at the idea.
"Yeah right. I'm not eating anything that witch makes. Probably poison in it."
"Brittany, don't you think you are a little harsh on her?" Eddie asked, but Brittany turned around with fire in her eyes.
"No! She's a horrible person. She divorced my dad and broke up the family. For what? So she can slut around and hop on as many men as she wants." Brittany scoffed. Eddie couldn't help but feel a burn of jealousy in his stomach at the thought of Y/N having sex with other people.
"She's dating?" Eddie asked, he wasn't sure if that was hope or disappointment in his voice.
"who cares, let's go get dinner with my dad," Brittany said, grabbing her phone and texting.
They finished getting dressed and walked downstairs. The smell of pasta filled the house and Eddie could feel his stomach growl.
"Just in time! I was about to call you down." Y/N said she cleaned her hands off on a towel as she looked over at them.
Eddie was zoned in on her sweaty skin. The sweat in her hairline, the wetness on her neck, and the way she threw her hair up to be out of the way. A few pieces framed her face, she wore no makeup. Her skin looked soft and flawless.
"We are eating with Dad so," Brittany said, a mocking pout on her face as she grabbed her coat.
"But Brittany, it's my weekend and I spent the last hour making Alfredo with chicken, broccoli, and garlic bread."
"No one asked you to," Brittany said, walking right out the door.
Eddie stood silently as he watched Y/N deflate. He moved a little closer to her, his movement reminded Y/N he was still there.
"Um here!" She said as she reached into her purse, she handed Eddie a bundle of cash. "That loser won't pay for anyone but himself. Get whatever you'd like and don't worry about change."
Eddie shivered as her hand touched his. He hated the sad look in her eyes. She looked exhausted and lonely.
"I'm sorry about her," Eddie said he didn't think twice before he pulled her into a hug. He had a few inches on her, his head on top of hers. He tried to focus on making her feel better and not on the fact her chest was pressed against his.
"You're an amazing mother and one day she'll realize you aren't the evil one."
Y/N gladly accepted the hug, she needed someone. She tried to ignore how amazing he smelled, how warm he felt, and how hard his chest felt. She pulled away and quickly wiped away the tear in her eye.
"You're a gentleman. Thank you." Y/N said. She watched as he walked out the door, closing it behind him.
That was the first time she felt something towards Eddie.
~~~
"Oh, Brittany isn't home yet," Y/N said as she checked her watch, Eddie stood on the doorstep.
"That's okay, I can come back," Eddie said, he went to turn around but Y/N stopped him.
"You can wait inside, hun."
Eddie smiled at the nickname, accepting her invitation inside.
"Want a snack?" She asked she walked into the kitchen, and Eddie followed behind. He took a seat at the counter as she opened up the cabinet, she named snack after snack. But Eddie craved to be between her thighs.
"Any of that pasta left?" He asked, "It smelled amazing the other night." Eddie felt himself smile as her face lit up.
"There is!" She sounded so excited as she began to warm up the meal for him on the stove. He tried to ignore the big amount she had left, knowing it would be left untouched by Brittany.
They made small conversation as she recooked the meal. She played it for him and set it in front of him.
"Thank you, Ms. Y/L/N, this is amazing." Eddie complimented as he took a few bites of the pasta.
"You can call me Y/N, and thank you. At least someone will eat it." She joked, but both knew it wasn't meant to be funny.
"She's missing out," Eddie said, taking another bite of the pasta.
"Does she ever...say anything nice about me?" Y/N asked, the vulnerability in her voice. She looked down at Eddie's plate, too shy to look in his eyes.
"Does she say anything nice about anyone?" Eddie joked, pride in his chest as Y/N let out a laugh.
"Fair enough." Y/N laughed.
"I think you're underappreciated though. You love her, you care about her so much. You're funny, I know you're incredibly smart, and independent. You don't let anything knock you down. There are so many nice things to say about you." Eddie said, his words soft as he looked into her eyes.
She tried to bite her lip to stop the huge smile creeping on. She felt her cheeks flame up as she took in the compliments.
"Effortlessly beautiful too," Eddie whispered, he didn't realize he was leaning closer to her until her lips were right in front of his face. Her elbows were on the counter as she leaned forward.
"You think I'm beautiful?" She whispered, her heart racing as he leaned further into her.
"Fucking breathtaking. Your beauty never leaves my mind. Your eyes, your hair, those lips and curves. "
She held her breath as he looked down at her lips. For a moment, she was weak. For a split second, she looked down at his lips too.
Then the front door slammed and Y/N jumped back. Her eyes wide as she realized she was seconds away from kissing a teenager, a boy who was still in high school, at least seventeen years younger than her, her daughter's boyfriend.
"Good, you're already here," Brittany said as she grabbed Eddie's arm and yanked him off the stool.
Y/N held her breath as Eddie gave her one last longing look. He was filled with disappointment as Brittany led him into her room. His heart was still racing from having Y/N so close, seconds away from tasting her breath.
Y/N rubbed her hands over her face before grabbing Eddie's plate. Panic in her chest as she anxiously scrubbed the plate clean. She clenched her eyes shut as she tried to forget the look in Eddie's eyes. A look she longed to see someone have, that look of lust and desire. She shook her head as different thoughts filled her head. Thoughts of his lips on hers, her chest, and her thighs. What was she thinking? It was so inappropriate to think of Eddie in that way. And it was inappropriate for Eddie to think of her the way he did, but she couldn't help but like that he did.
What the fuck was she doing?
~~~
A week passed since her moment with Eddie in the kitchen and she couldn't forget it. But she knew she needed to.
She sat on the couch, a glass of wine in her hand as she watched some old movie. She sat in a T-shirt and panties, a blanket on her naked legs. She groaned when she heard a knock on the door, she sat down her glass and wrapped the blanket around herself as she walked to the door.
"Eddie?" Confusion on her face when she opened the door. "Brittany is at her dad's house."
"Not here for her," Eddie admitted, his hand on the door as he pushed it open further and walked in.
"Eddie." Y/N sighed as she closed the door. The speech died on her tongue when she turned around and he towered over her.
"hm?" He asked, his eyes scanning all over her face.
"What are you here for?" She asked, taking a step back. She took a big gulp of air as she tried to ignore how hot her body was. She walked to the couch and sat back down. She sipped on her wine, praying it would calm down her nerves. But she grew more nervous when he took the spot next to her. His fingers grabbed the blanket, moving it off her bare legs.
"I can't get that moment out of my head. Being so close to finally kissing you." He said, his hands skimming up her naked legs. She tried to keep her breathing even as he moved up her thighs.
"Eddie, we can't." She said, stopping his hand and moving it off of her.
"I don't care. I want it." He argued, his voice deep and raspy.
She gasped as he pushed her knees apart, easily placing his body between her. His knees were against the cushions as he towered over her again.
"You want it too. You want to feel wanted, desired and loved. You want someone to make your skin burn and your toes curl. You want someone to need you so desperately." He whispered, his hand grabbed hers. She whined when he placed her hand on his thin sweatpants, his hard cock easy to feel. "And I'm that someone."
"Eddie, you are my daughter's boyfriend. This is very inappropriate." Y/N tried again, but Eddie kept her hand right against him. He listened to her words but pushed his hips forward, pushing his cock into her hand.
"Forget about her. Focus on just me." He said softly, leaning down as he softly pecked her lips. He waited a second, watching her as she licked her lips. He could see the gears working in her mind. His lips were inches away from hers.
She freed her hand from his grip, using both her hands to tangle them into his hair as she smashed her lips on his. Her eyes closed as she let herself melt into him. Eddie moaned as he pushed her body down on the couch, his tongue working inside of her mouth as he let his hands feel every inch of her. The kiss was hot and messy, but she didn't care.
Y/N wasn't sure how they moved so fast, but before she knew it her panties were pushed to the side as Eddie's tongue dove between her thighs. She moaned as his tongue flicked her clit and three fingers pushed inside her cunt.
She wasn't even embarrassed that she hadn't shaved. With her ex-husband, she was always smooth and prepped, otherwise, he'd never go down on her. But here Eddie was, eating her out with no care in the world.
"Fuck Eddie." She whined, her hands in his hair, pushing his head against her cunt. He happily let her take control, he let her rock her hips against his tongue. He sucked on her clit, fingering her as fast as he could. He loved the way she got louder and louder. His name on her lips, the way her thighs clenched around his head. She gripped his hair so tight as she rocked her hips against his face. With his free hand, he reached up her body to play with her chest.
"RIGHT THERE!" she screamed, his fingers hitting the spongy spot inside of her. Eddie smirked against her cunt as he continuously hit that spot, watching her body twitch beyond her control.
She gasped as she felt her orgasm building, one hand on his head as the other flew behind her, smacking her glass of red wine straight to the floor. Her back arched as she came on his fingers and tongue.
~~~
Y/N whined as she scrubbed her carpet. The red stain did not leave as she continued to work on it. She felt sweat on her brow as she scraped and scraped.
"Don't mind her. She spilled wine over the weekend and won't give up on it." Brittany scoffed as she welcomed Eddie inside the house.
Eddie tried to hide his smirk when he watched Y/N scrub the stain on her hands and knees.
"Oh no, wonder how that happened," Eddie said, his voice catching Y/N's attention. Her head snapped to look over her shoulder.
"Who cares." Brittany said, walking up the stairs.
Eddie gave Y/N a wink before he followed Brittany up the stairs.
~~~
Y/N tossed and turned in her bed. Ever since Eddie ate her out on the couch, she's tried to sleep with this burning ache in her cunt.
She barely slept that Friday night after he left. Saturday she got a blink of sleep. And now Sunday, was worse than ever knowing he was just down the hall.
She groaned as the bright red lights shined
2:05
Another night of no sleep. She might as well make the best of it. She slid her hands down into her panties, instantly moaning as she spread her wetness up and down.
"Psst." She jumped up when she heard a sound. She flipped on the lamp next to her bed.
"Eddie!" She scolded quietly, the boy stood in her doorway, a cheeky smile on his face.
She couldn't help but let her eyes rank down his naked chest. He was a skinny boy but toned in the rest places. He had a clean chest but a happy trail that made her mind wander. Some tattoos scattered along his chest, she always questioned if he had more than just the ones on his arms.
"What are you doing?" She whispered, slightly embarrassed that she was about to finger herself to the thought of him to get rid of the ache between her thighs.
He closed the door behind him, the sound of the lock made her shiver. He tugged down his sleep shorts, and his cock sprang up to smack his stomach. Y/N couldn't help but clench her thighs together underneath the sheets.
"Trying so hard to sleep. But my mind kept thinking of you laying here, thought of the way you tasted when you came all over my tongue." He moaned as he walked to her bed.
He yanked down her blanket, ignoring her gasps as he crawled between her legs.
"I can smell you, smell so sweet and wet." He moaned, he leaned down to nudge his nose against her covered clit. His tongue ran over her cunt.
"Someone started without me." He said with a smirk, looking up at her.
Y/N wasn't sure what came over her. She didn't know if it was the fact he looked so hot smirking between her legs, or that she's been craving him in ways she shouldn't. But she lost control.
Before she knew it, he was under her, his hands bruised her hips as she rode him. Her nails clawed down his chest as her cunt clenched around him. His mouth sucked on her chest, creating a trail of marks.
"Fuck you're so good. Such a good cock." She praised, her brain melted with the way he fucked back up into her.
Eddie whined under her praise, her words alone had him clenching his thighs.
"Oh someone like that? Does someone like praise?" She teased, he whined louder. His hips struggled to keep up with his rhythm.
She leaned down to pinch his cheeks together, his lips puffed out.
"Answer me." She demanded, her nose against his as she slowed down her hips.
"Yes, mommy."
His eyes flew wide open when he released what he said. Fear in his stomach as she froze on top of him. The apology was ready on his tongue.
"Say it again." She asked, her eyes bored into his.
"Fuck me, Mommy. "
Y/N moaned as she began to move her hips again. She fucked him and she fucked him hard. She placed her feet on either side of Eddie's body, the extra leverage helped her ride him faster. Her hands held on to his hairy thighs as she bounced on him.
Eddie couldn't keep up with her, his orgasm so close that he couldn't think straight. It felt so good to be taken care of. He loved that she had the control and he was forced to take it all. She used his cock the exact way she wanted it.
"Fuck, gonna." He warned, he quickly gained his control, flipped them over and pulled out. He painted her stomach with his cum. He kept his eyes on her the best he could as he pumped himself dry.
"That's mommy's good boy." She praised, she scooped up his cum and placed it on her tongue. Eddie felt himself choke on his spit as he watched her.
"You're so fucking sexy." He praised, his lips pressed against hers.
"Make me cum, Eddie," she said against his lips.
~~~
Two months passed, Eddie and Y/N found themselves sneaking off to see each other. Some nights they hooked up and other night they talked.
Y/N hated that she found herself falling for Eddie. She hated that he made her feel so loved and wanted. She felt like an idiot for craving something real with him. Which could never happen. He was young and had a whole future ahead of him, oh and the fact that he's dating her daughter.
So she went back on the dating websites. She needed to move on and get Eddie out of her head.
~~~
Eddie didn't question why Brittany bounced on him the second they heard the front door open. His mouth was covered by hers as she practically choked him with her tongue.
Her hands were removing his clothes faster than he could ask what was going on.
"Brittany, slow down. What's going on?"
Before she could answer, Eddie heard laughter coming from downstairs. The sounds of giggles and a male voice.
"Who's that?" Eddie asked
"My mom and her date. Can we fuck now?" Brittany scoffed, her lips on his neck.
Eddie sat in pity as she kissed his neck. All he could hear was the sound of Y/N giggling and flirting with that man. With her date.
She was dating? And bringing him home? Was she hoping they'd have sex? Eddie couldn't help but wonder if she showered, shaved, and bought sexy lingerie just to wear for her date. He felt the jealousy burning in his skin when he heard that familiar moan.
"That's so good." Y/N moaned, it was needy and whiny, and it caused something to snap in Eddie.
He had Brittany screaming underneath him as he fucked out his anger and jealousy. He pounded into her hard, no part of him cared to be gentle. Her bed was smacking into the wall, guaranteed echoing throughout the house. And the thought made Eddie smirk. He wanted Y/N to know he was fucking Brittany like there wasn't a tomorrow. He wanted her to be just as jealous as he felt.
"BEST CUNT I'VE EVER HAD." Eddie screamed, his hand smacking against the wall.
~
Eddie panted as Brittany began to get dressed. The sweat was thick on his skin as he pulled on his boxers. There was silence downstairs, no more giggles and moans. Eddie felt sick at the thought. Maybe it was silent because their mouths were busy.
But then Brittany's door slammed open. Y/N stood pissed on the other side. Eddie couldn't help but take in the beautiful tight red dress she wore. It framed her perfectly. Her hair was loose on her shoulders, makeup simple but captivating. She looked stunning.
"I ASKED YOU FOR ONE THING! I asked you just for once not to fuck something up for me. Why can't you let me have anything?" Y/N screamed, her finger pointed straight at Brittany, who simply rolled her eyes.
Eddie gulped as he covered his mostly naked body with the blanket. Not like either person in that room hasn't seen it, but he felt like he was just as in trouble.
"Oh I'm sorry! Was that date tonight? The one you asked me to not interrupt?" Brittany asked, a fake confused look on her face.
"I'm tired of you disrespecting me. You get to be happy, your father gets to be happy, why can't I be happy? Your father fucking cheated on me! He hooked up with every whore in his office, and he's the one with a girlfriend and a daughter that loves him. Why can't I ever just have something without you ruining it? Especially when you admitted you didn't want it" Eddie swore her eyes landed on him before she went back to Brittany. "WHY DO I HAVE TO BE ALONE AND SUFFER?" Y/N cried, her eyes watered. Eddie couldn't tell if it was from sadness or pure anger.
But now he couldn't help but feel sick to his stomach. He ruined her night just as much as Brittany did. He purposely ruined her night just as much as Brittany did.
For once, Brittany was silent.
Y/N took a deep breath and wiped her eyes. Her once perfect makeup was starting to smear as more water dropped from her eyes.
"Eddie, I'd like you to leave for tonight." She said before she closed the door.
"You've got to be kidding me, Brittany!" Eddie scoffed, throwing the blankets off as he stood up.
"what did I do?"
"You planned it! You invited me over, telling me you wanted to have sex. Then we sat here for two hours doing nothing. The second your mom comes home you attack. You wanted to ruin her date." Eddie said as he realized. He couldn't help but feel like such an idiot. He knew his jealousy was getting out of hand, it killed him to hear Y/N giggle with another man. He didn't even think about how Y/N might have felt throughout it all. The embarrassment she probably felt as Eddie and Brittany's sounds traveled down the stairs to interrupt her date.
"Oh please! Like you didn't enjoy it? Who were you putting the show on for, Eddie. Me or my fucking mom?"
Eddie froze as the words left Brittany's lips. His back to her as he thought about what to say.
"You two really thought I wouldn't notice?" Brittany scoffed. "I always knew my mother was a whore, but to fuck my own boyfriend? New low."
Eddie turned around in a heat of anger. His jaw clenched as he grabbed Brittany's arm and held it tightly.
"Don't you call her that." He seethed.
"I knew it," Brittany laughed, she yanked her arm free. "I did plan it, Eddie. I planned to kill two birds with one stone. Ruin the relationship with whatever poor excuse of a man she found on that website, and to ruin the relationship she had with you."
Eddie was looking into the face of evil and didn't know what to do. He was scared he fucked up with Y/N. He was so fucking scared.
"The relationship isn't ruined. I'll talk to her, I'll apologize and explain it all." Eddie said, he threw on his clothes.
"I'm afraid that won't work, sweetie." Brittany smirked. "You see, I already had a conversation with her about you. She admitted she really fell for you," she mocked. Eddie felt his heart race, Y/N fell for him? "Think of how hurt she probably was when you were so busy making sure I could scream your name so she could hear. So she could hear just how much you wanted me."
"You set me up." Eddie snapped.
"Yeah I did. We're done. My dad and I are leaving the state tonight. Hope you two are happy." Brittany said, grabbing a packed bag from her closet. She walked out of her room, down the stairs, and out the door.
Eddie stood in the silence of her room. Y/N's across the hall, the door shut. He hung his head as he walked the distance. He felt like his tail was tucked between his legs as he knocked on the door.
"Y/N?"
"I asked you to go home." She said through the door.
"I know, but can we talk? I need to explain." He begged, his knocks continued on the door.
Y/N yanked open the door, her eyes were red and her makeup was cleaned off.
"Explain what? That you were simply having sex with your girlfriend? Trust me, Eddie. This was so fucking stupid of us. I'm a mom, and you are only eighteen. It's time I act like an adult. Go home Eddie. And please don't come back here again."
The door slammed in his face.
~~~
Eddie went to her house every day for a week. And each day she never answered. But this time was different, he didn't leave. He refused to leave. He wanted her, and he wasn't leaving.
He opened the door, walking right in.
"Eddie come on!" She whined in frustration.
"You want me and I want you. You fell for me and I fell for you. Why are you saying no?" Eddie asked.
"I'm saying no because you are my daughter's boyfriend."
"I'm not anymore and you know that. I'm single now and so are you. What's the real reason you are telling me no? Why are you scared of there being an us?"
"EDDIE!" She snapped, "My god, think logically! You graduate in what, a month? Then you are off to college. And once you see college girls, you're not going to want this." She said as she gestured between them.
"I'm always going to want this." Eddie said.
"You're too young to understand. But I'm right about this."
"Stop treating me like I'm a child!" Eddie snapped, "I know how I feel and that has nothing to do with my age."
"Yes it does! You think in a year when you are surrounded by college girls, having the time of your life going to parties, that you are going to want to come back here to visit your girlfriend that graduated college ten years ago?" Y/N scoffed.
"I won't have to come visit you, because I'm not leaving."
"Eddie-"
"No, listen to me. I don't plan to go to college, I didn't plan to go before I met you. You just gave me more of a reason to want to stay here. For once in your life, I need you to believe that someone loves you and that someone wants you. Let me be that someone." Eddie said, he slowly moved closer to her. He grasped her hands.
"Just give me the chance." Eddie begged, he dropped down to his knees, he kissed her hands before he let them go. Then he wrapped his arms around her, his face against her stomach.
"Let me love you." He said, moving down her body as he began to tug down her leggings. She huffed but she didn't stop him.
"Let me show you how happy I can make you." He said against her bare thighs as he kissed her skin. His mouth moved closer to her cunt.
"Please. I love you" He said, his nose inhaling her sweet scent.
"I love you too." She whined, her head thrown back as he rubbed his nose against her covered clit.
He smiled in victory and kissed back up her body, landing on her lips.
"Tonight, I'm taking you out on a real date. I don't care what anyone thinks. I want to be with you and call you mine."
"I want to be with you too." She said as she wrapped her arms around him.
Their relationship may have not made sense to anyone else. It may have been very frowned upon. But for once, she was happy and felt loved. She deserved that. And Eddie was more than honored to be the one to give it to her.
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joelsgoldrush · 10 months
Text
swore i heard you whisper that you preferred us like that
joel miller x f!reader / 5,8k words
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summary: you ask joel –the quiet, distant joel– to teach you how to ride a horse. they say the eyes are the window to the soul, and it must be true, because when he really sees you, it´s like he finally understands what you feel for him.
warnings: smut 18+ let’s pretend joel never left jackson, porn with plot, no use of y/n, age gap (reader is in her late 20s, joel is 56), grinding, oral (f receiving), fingering, masturbation, pet names, unprotected p in v (don't try this at home ok), dirty talk, soft!dom joel (sort of???), a bit of angst/feelings, joel gets all babygirl around reader, ellie appears for like a minute, mediocre attempt at recreating joel's southern accent (sorry in advance)
a/n: hello??? well this is my first fic ever so bear with me, i'm still new to all this. also english isn't my first language so i'm afraid there may be mistakes (mostly when it comes to collocations bc i hate them and they confuse me), buuuut i'm learning obviously and if you find anything that should be corrected PLEASE TELL ME thank you :) i'd appreciate if you told whether you liked this story (idk what to call it tbh) but if you don't it's more than fine! anyways thank you so much for reading if you come across this fic, i hope you like it! i've spent a week writing it bc finals season is killing me <///3
here's my masterlist in case you want to read my other works :)
"Oh, my drunken southern star / How you tried to hide in darkness / Slipped from orbit / Now you’re dangerously close / Come out, come out from all your hiding out / We’ll dig in our heels, salute the battlefields / Where our broken hearts were born."
What is it that he has?
You used to ask yourself that question every night as you went to bed. On some occasions, you couldn't manage to come up with an exact answer. There were too many reasons that disclosed why a man like him lingered on your mind, even in those moments that were supposed to be for you and only you. Sleeping more than three hours a day was definitely something you needed tremendously, but still, the not-so-rational voice inside your head kept on bringing his name up without fail, disturbing your rest.
Joel Miller. Was it possible to feel like this? Like you knew somebody without having exchanged more than five words with them? Sure, there wasn't a single person in Jackson who wasn't aware of his existence. From whispered rumors in the streets to stories that intended to give his reserved personality an explanation, Joel became a real talking-point among those in the commune. Years ago, when the world was still just a floating ball in space, he would’ve frightened you, being the kind of person your parents used to warn you about as you started to grow older.
He walked a certain way, as if he were holding the suffering of many lives in his hands. Always on guard, prepared to fight those who defied him. Hidden knives in his pockets, a gun between his fingers, the trigger too tempting to be pulled at any time given. His hair was a mixture of brown and gray, and you swore that the latter was only becoming more prominent as days went by. 
Suddenly, your pillow felt too uncomfortable, your hands fisting the fabric of your t-shirt while you kicked the blanket resting on top of your bare feet. A sigh escaped your lips, the taste of something you couldn't even distinguish on your tongue, your unsteady breath being the only sound to be heard in that noiseless night. 
You were having a hard time figuring out how you felt about Joel (if there was anything to feel in the first place, since he barely remembered your face and there you were, fantasizing about him instead of sleeping.) Maybe you liked how he presented himself, how bossy and persistent he looked the times you caught him patrolling around the zone. Or perhaps it was his character what charmed you in the first place, and the fact that, deep down, a different side from him remained completely unseen.
He was handsome, too. Tall, broad shoulders, aquiline nose. His arms looked majestic in every single piece of clothing he wore, his tanned skin shiny enough to reflect the very same sun. And his legs… you were sure they were muscular like the rest of his body, because of all the physical effort he did. You had  heard that he worked as a contractor before the pandemic, which made a lot of sense. Once or twice you had paid attention to his hands and–
Then, a familiar feeling sinked in. Warm began spreading through your belly, your thighs involuntary clenching together. “Fuck,” you muttered in a low tone, keeping your hands glued to your sides. Another motive not to think about Joel: he made you feel… things. Certain things that you hadn't felt for anyone in a very long time. You preferred to think that it was probably due to the fact that you were touch-starved, and not because you found yourself deeply attracted to him. Never had you ever been a sexually active person, so why now? Why did the mere image of Joel in your mind turn you on? 
He’s strong. I’m alone. I feel the need to find someone who’s willing to protect me. That’s it. No other reason.
Your internal monologue was lacking in arguments, but it was definitely something you could work with. As if on cue, you found it hard to keep your eyes open, your limbs not feeling as if they were yours anymore. Next thing you knew, you were asleep.
That night, you dreamt with Joel.
★ ★ ★ ★ ★
In a small cabin, you taught children how to paint and draw. Maria believed it to be helpful for their psychological development or something like that, and you had agreed to do it. A good way to spend your free time– that’s what it was. Plus, you liked children; some would even choose to include you in their drawings, and that small gesture just warmed your heart.
There, you met Ellie, a teenager whose basic vocabulary consisted mostly of profanities. 
And boy, you loved Ellie.
It was hard not to, actually. She was like a breath of fresh air, with her jokes and instant charm. You two became attached in a short time, and she reminded you of a younger version of you, just a lot braver. Although in this world it brought her benefits, you sometimes wished she wouldn’t have gone through all that shit. Those eyes, which squinted as she laughed if you tickled her sides, were the cemetery of many buried memories. You wondered how she managed to put a smile on her face despite her past and the horrible things she had seen, hoping it was genuine and not a mask.
“Look!” her voice brought you back to reality. Blinking in her direction, you realized the amount of paint you had dropped onto the floor, a red stain already forming on the carpet. “Are you okay? You seem off.”
“I’m fine! Just a bit sleepy today, that's all,” you got closer to where she was lying down, her fingers moving the brush you had gifted her in different directions. Squatting a bit, you placed a strand of hair that didn’t make it into her ponytail behind her ear. “So, what are you painting?”
She smiled warmly, and her teeth catched her lower lip momentarily. “It’s not finished, okay? Don’t freak out. I know you’re a perfectionist.”
“I’m not…” you tried to explain yourself, but ended up choosing to be defeated. “Maybe you’re right. Anyway, may I see it?”
The canvas was in your hands a few moments later. Ellie spoke beside you, her words mixing together in a sign of embarrassment. “It’s for Joel. Figured I could do something nice for him, you know? I don’t– I think I need to start over. His eyes look kind of strange, don’t they? They’re so close he looks like a cyclops.”
“Don’t say that, kiddo. This is… it’s beautiful,” your index finger traced the lines framing his jaw, the shades of his skin perfectly achieved. You held the painting even tighter, afraid of breaking it for a second. He wasn’t frowning like he normally did; Ellie had painted him smiling, and the crinkles by his eyes matched his age. Surely you must have spent more time than necessary staring at it, ‘cause then Ellie continued talking.
“Well, you know what they say: The student has become the teacher.” 
You handed the canvas to her, a smirk taking place on your face. “Yeah, I guess I’ll stop teaching you if that’s the case.”
An hour or so later, someone knocked on the door. As both of your hands were occupied (a more formal way to say that they were dirty with paint), you screamed “Come in!”, and Ellie covered her painting with an old, muddy curtain you used to clean the tables in which the children worked. You were about to ask her why she had reacted in that way, until you turned around and saw him.
Joel was there, as every other Wednesday. In your cabin, standing right in front of you. And you didn’t even look presentable. His hair looked messy, a couple of locks stuck to his forehead with sweat. “Hi,” he said shortly, meeting your gaze and attempting to shake your hand, but you avoided contact.
Showing him your hands, you held your palms in the air as an indication of the still fresh paint on your skin. “Sorry. If I were to accept the gesture, I’d leave you a stain.”
He retrieved a bit, adjusting his glove. “It’s okay. Safety first.”
That was supposed to be a joke, you noticed tardily. The silence in the room persisted until Ellie appeared from behind your back, already putting her coat on.
“You were supposed to pick me up in half an hour, asshole.”
His mouth snapped shut for an instant. “I missed you too. How was the class?” 
Ellie lifted her shoulder in a half shrug, looking in your direction and proceeding to jerk her thumb toward Joel. She didn’t want him to see the painting. “Fine as usual.”
“Can I see what you’re–”
“No fucking way!” she accentuated the word fucking, drawing him closer to the door. 
“Why not?”
“Because it’s not done.”
“But–”
“No more questions, Joel. Let’s go! Say bye!” Ellie handled him like a baby, which made you giggle.
Though you saw Joel raising his eyebrows, so you stopped laughing. 
Soon, they left and the cabin returned to its familiar quietness. A sigh erupted from your chest, and you allowed yourself to fall on top of a chair.
At least you could say you had actually talked to Joel for once.
★ ★ ★ ★ ★
It didn’t surprise you that you wanted to see him again.
Not in the “you-turn-me-on” way, but in the “you-seem-interesting-and-i-need-to-find-out-why” one.
He had something. Something so magnetic and indecipherable that kept pulling you towards him. Something that made you look for his presence in every crew, and not sensing what it was only made your wishes to dissect him grow bigger. There was a tiny probability that he was an idiot with a pretty face. Who knew? You definitely didn’t, and that needed to change. You deserved to know if pining over that man was worth it or not.
That chain of thoughts led you to look for him the next day, almost trembling with eagerness as you asked him the most stupid and unexpected question you could have imagined.
“Would you teach me how to ride a horse?”
He looked at you as if you were out of your mind, opening his mouth a few times and then closing it before he actually replied to you. “You’re tellin' me you don’t know how to ride a horse?”
“Tried it a few times, but failed and now I really want to learn to do it properly,” you swore his eyes were trying to decipher if you were saying the truth or not. “Ellie told me that you could probably make some time to teach me?”
“So Ellie's in charge of my schedule, I suppose?” you froze on the spot, and he must have noticed it because then his expression dulled. “Sorry, sweetheart. It was a joke. I've been told I'm not the best humorist.”
Sweetheart. You could’ve died a happy girl.
“Look, why don’t we meet up tomorrow after lunch? I'm sure it won’t take us much time. Not a difficult task, y’know?” he stroked his beard, apparently thinking you understood what he was talking about. 
“Sure. Thank you, Joel. My name’s–“
He didn’t let you finish. “I do know your name,” and before leaving, he repeated: “I’ll be here tomorrow. You know where to find me.”
To say that you slept without interruptions that night was an understatement. Each hour seemed to become longer the more you glimpsed your watch. Your heart drummed inside your chest violently, and you feared that someone else would be able to hear it if they got close enough to you. 
After having lunch in the same spot as every other mundane day, your legs took you to the stable. You took a shaky breath, expecting him to appear out of thin air, but fifteen minutes went by, and there was still no sign of Joel. Pressing your forehead against the wooden door, you wrapped your arms around yourself. “What was I even thinking?” 
“Hey.”
You looked to your side and– there he was, already getting inside the stable and inviting you to follow him. Joel petted one of the horses, clicking his tongue. His fingers caressed the animal’s back, and when he shot a glance at you, he didn’t ignore your disturbed expression.
“Don’t tell me you’re afraid of horses.”
“I’m not afraid of them,” you laughed awkwardly, eyeing the horse, which stared at you with those big and strange eyes. You raised your hand to mimic Joel, but that just made the animal move further away from you. “I guess it’s mutual. We don’t like each other.”
Joel smirked, guiding you outside. “It’s a damn horse. I don’t think you can tell whether he likes you or not. You gotta change that attitude of yours,” he murmured as he got on top of the horse, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Treat him well and he’ll be nice.”
At first, Joel taught you the basics: how to position yourself for balance, get your legs in the right position, hold the reins properly. A little bit of help coming from him was needed for you to mount the horse. He got down on one knee, patting it as if it were a mounting block. “Come on. Step on it.”
No need to ask me twice, you thought as you did what you were told, and once you were grabbing on those reins for dear life, you observed him with curious eyes. “Now what?”
“Now…” he pressed his hand into one of the horse’s sides, and afterwards, the horse began to fucking trot and you cried out, a high-pitched shriek slipping from your mouth. Joel laughed maliciously, almost hypnotized by the scene. “Now is when you learn how to ride a horse!”
“This isn't funny!” you screamed, the horse still very much entertained with the way you were jerking on top of him. “Stop!”
You couldn't believe how he kept… cracking up. Joel touched his stomach, shaking with laughter. “You’re a natural, can’t you see it? I’m havin' the time of my life here.”
“What I can see is that you’re an idiot! Cut the cackle and help me!”
But he didn’t move a single muscle. Instead, he remained still, that smug look never abandoning his features.
The bastard. “You’re gonna make me beg? In this situation?”
Crossing his arms while teasingly grinning at you, he added: “Wouldn’t hurt to try.”
“Joel Miller, will you help me? Pretty please?” your hair was getting in the way, and you could taste it as you insisted. “Is that enough for you?”
It was, actually. He helped you get down from the horse, his thick fingers digging into the mushy skin of your waist. It shouldn’t have felt that good, but it did. You were supposed to be angry at him for setting you up and still, by touching you for a microsecond, he had transformed you into something malleable.
Sadly, that feeling didn’t last much longer. “Didn’t know you were a man of manners. Should’ve told me beforehand.”
“Didn't know you could scream like that. I hope you didn’t freak anyone out.”
The two of you continued to practice until nightfall. A thing you also learned, apart from horse riding, was that Joel was a determined man. Everytime you tried to quit, he stopped you, making it impossible for you to rest. You stared at him, rubbing the back of your sore neck with a grimace. “I’m tired. Can we go back?”
“One more time.”
“Joel–”
“Trot a couple of meters just one more time, and that’s it for today. Can you do that for me?”
You tried not to pay too much attention to his choice of words, although it was basically non-viable. He looked sinful, and you longed to shut him up with a bruising kiss. Again, a hopeless option. Your hands itched to touch him, to feel his stubble, rough and coarse under your thumbs. How could you stay focused when the man you had been daydreaming with for the last couple of months was bossing you around? 
Despite your inability to clear your head of any of those thoughts, you managed to accomplish what he had asked you to do. “Well done,” he offered you his hand to dismount the horse and you accepted it, sighing as you stretched out your arms. “We should take him back to the stable,” Joel suggested, giving you the impression of being pleased as you told him you were coming with him.
Inside the stable, he relocated the horse into one of the many stalls. Unbelievably, the place didn’t smell like absolute shit, which was what you were expecting from a barn. “Thank you for the lesson,” you told Joel once he was done with the horse.
“Anytime,” he scratched his jaw, the dim light making his dark eyes look, if possible, even darker. “It wasn’t that bad, was it?”
“No. You were right,” your heart thrummed with every word that he blurted. His presence was addictive. You were never the one to have any bad habits, but deep down, you recognized that he easily could develop one. “I thought you were less talkative.”
“So did I,” for an instant, he pressed his lips together, forming a tight line, as if he had said something he shouldn’t have in the first place. “I think I didn’t ask you this before: but why now? I mean, why did you wait so much time to learn how to ride a horse? Everyone in Jackson seems to know how.”
You cleared your throat, his piercing eyes peering at your movements. “I guess I thought it wasn't necessary back then, before all this. It's one of those things that you don't even consider until it becomes inevitable. I used to believe I had a lot of time left when I was younger,” you had never talked about this with anyone else. There was something so intimate about this conversation, how Joel stood seemingly tongue-tied in front of you, as if he were taking notes of what you were confessing to him. “I remember being a kid and not wanting to use my toys sometimes because I kept waiting for the right moment. But then…”
“You realize there’s no such thing as the right moment,” he finished the sentence for you, and you bowed your head. “Life can end at any moment, especially in a world like ours. That’s why you always gotta do what you wish to. We never know what’ll happen tomorrow.”
“Live for today, hope for tomorrow? That’s your creed?” you tried to mock him, the tension in the stable far from evident, but he didn’t move.
���It’s the way I try to live my own life. I don’t like being left with the desire to do somethin’ I could’ve done earlier. Too old for that.”
Maybe you were gradually losing it. Perhaps just a little. It couldn’t be a coincidence, right? Had he noticed how you acted around him? Were you that obvious?
“So, you would advise me to just…”
“Do whatever you feel right, sweetheart.”
That raspy sweetheart made you give in.
His eyes. His penetrating, gleaming eyes scrutinized your face at the same time you closed the distance between your bodies. From there, you were able to see every freckle, every small detail that you hadn’t previously acknowledged. He parted his lips, as if to speak, but no words other than your name came out. One of your hands made its way up to his cheek, cupping it, feeling the warmth his skin radiated. His head immediately leaned into your touch, like a moth into a flame. 
You kissed him, unable to keep waiting. It took him what felt like ages to kiss you back, his fingers tangling in your hair. He absorbed your whimpers, pressing your back against the nearest wall. Maddening– it was the perfect word to describe how being kissed by Joel felt like. When you thought he was going to draw away from you, he just held you tighter until your lungs implored for some air. Your knees had never felt this weak, and you found yourself grabbing onto his shoulders, already feeling the places where his stubble had left its trace in flames. 
“Joel…” you mumbled against his lips, detaching your mouth from his. Your erratic breaths seemed to sync together like a melody, and you tugged at the collar of his jacket. 
He knew, could see it on your features. “Wanna go to yours?”
Joel took you home. The moment you set foot in the cabin, he closed the door behind him, his hand lingering on the handle as he contemplated you from a distance. You took your coat off first, starting to unzip your pants. There was silence long enough to hear crickets in, the moon up in the sky being the only bystander of your meeting. His eyes roamed the newly exposed skin of your legs and you observed him gulp. 
“Did something happen?” you asked him, a flush crepting up your face. Taking a step forward, one of his hands came to rest on top of yours.
“No, it’s just that– Are you sure you want this?”
Crinkling your nose, you uttered: “Why wouldn’t I?”
“I’m just too old for you,” he warned you, running a knuckle down your cheek. “You should be with guys your age, y’know? Not with an old man like me.”
“I want you,” reassuring him, you got rid of your t-shirt, and the fact he was still dressed up from neck to toes lit some kind of fire inside you. His calloused fingers fiddled with the strap of your bra until it slipped off your shoulder. “This is what I want. Please, Joel.”
It turned out that Joel Miller certainly was a man of manners.
You couldn't help but moan as he grabbed you by the waist, dragging you to the couch by the window and straddling his lap, his hard-on finding its place beneath you, pulsing and in need of more. His tongue brushed yours ever so often, and your eyes rolled to the back of your head as his teeth latched onto the skin of your throat. Joel groaned, the sound, low and primal, having its desired effect on you, your hips involuntarily grinding against his in a delicious but tormenting rhythm that already had you on the verge of tears.
“Joel, please,” you managed to plead, not knowing precisely what you were asking for. His hands cupped your ass, imprinting his fingerprints on the soft flesh, forcing your hips to go harder and harder. The harsh fabric of his pants was definitely going to leave a mark on your cheeks, and thinking that helped you realize that you were the only one –almost– naked. You reached for the buttons of his denim shirt, your lips hovering over his. “Take your clothes off?”
He did the rest himself, throwing his jacket to the floor. When he got to his jeans, he cocked his head. “Why don’t we move this to the bedroom, if you’re so goddamn needy?” The few guys you had been with had never been very talkative during sex; there was even this one specific boy who had asked you to not make a sound while he fucked you. 
But Joel wasn’t like them. It was just starting and you had already realized that he had a dirty mouth, an expectant look on his face every time he waited for your reaction to his words. “Now you’re quiet, huh? Thought you wanted me to fuck you, darlin',” one of his fingers pressed down on your clit, stimulating it through your underwear. He sighed, stopping his movements and pressing the damp pad of it against your lower lip, urging you to taste yourself. “You’re wet, baby. So fuckin’ wet. Have you been like this all day? Bet you would’ve let me take you right there in the forest.”
“Oh my God,” you whined next to his ear, your whole body trembling with desire. “Take me to bed,” you begged him, and next thing you knew, he was grabbing you as if you weighed nothing and heading towards your room. 
Not knowing how, you kept your hands to yourself until he placed you on top of the bed. Joel shoved his jeans down and you didn’t think twice– you stroked his length, the fabric of his boxers only making the slow drag of your hand more satisfying. His long fingers circled your throat, and you moaned as you kept eliciting exquisite noises from him. “Let me take care of you,” his dilated pupils carved holes in your being, his grip doing nothing to cease the ache between your legs. “Please, baby. I need to make you feel good. Been thinkin’ about this for so long.”
“What?” you slowed down your pace, looking up at him through your eyelashes. “You wanted me?”
“Why do you think I began to pick Ellie up from your classes, huh? Because I’m a good, generous man?” Joel parted your knees, getting closer to where you required him the most. “I’m sorry to ruin this, but I’m far from good. Just wanted to see you and your pretty face. Didn’t know if we were on the same page until you came lookin' for me, askin' me to teach you how to ride a damn horse,” you hadn’t noticed your bra was missing till he cupped one of your breasts, flicking your nipple between his fingers. “I’m sure there were many other people you could’ve asked to teach you, but you chose me, didn’t you?”
“Don’t want anybody else,” your lips chased his, a drop of sweat already rolling down your temple. “I didn’t– didn’t know you noticed me.”
“How could I not? If you could only look at yourself like I’m doing right now… You’re a sight, sweetheart, all spread out for me,” removing your panties, he kissed the skin where your inner thighs met, his tongue darting out to draw imaginary figures on your flesh. His mouth was just inches away from your cunt, and you had to tell him.
“Joel?”
“What’s wrong?”
“I’ve never– nobody has ever done that for me.”
He seemed to understand what you were referring to. It made you tense a bit, despite the fact that you were completely naked in front of him, basically begging him to tear you apart. Still, the realization that you weren't as expert as him hit you out of nowhere. Yeah, it was all fun and games, kissing and touching probably the hottest man you had seen in your almost three decades of life. But said man was a lot older than you, and he had lived his best years in the real world, not this fucked up version you grew up in. You were sure he had been with many different women, which wasn’t a problem– you two were nothing.
“Nobody has ever tasted ya’? That’s what you’re tryin’ to tell me?” you nodded quickly, shoving a strand of his graying hair back away from his eyes. Joel chuckled languidly, squeezing your hips. “Do you want me to? It’s okay if you don’t. We can try somethin’ else.”
“Please,” you’d have time to embarrass yourself later, thinking about the amount of times you had repeated that word. But certain moments were to be lived only once, and though you hoped it wasn't the case, you had to take the chance. “I want you to.”
Four words. It took Joel four words to disappear between your legs, licking a hot stripe up your folds. You nibbled on your bottom lip, a loud moan filling the void of your dorm. He drew sweet patterns in your cunt, discovering a part of you that no one else ever had, and you couldn’t help but to grind against his face as he dipped the tip of his tongue into your entrance. Breathing wasn’t a necessity anymore. You felt as if all the air in the world was being punched out of your lungs, the knot in your belly growing tighter the more Joel spent his precious time keeping you entertained.
At some point, he focused his attention on your clit, circling it over and over again, making you shudder. Suddenly, the pad of his middle finger tested the waters, and he slowly slid it into your cunt, earning a strangled whine from you. Burying your hands in his hair, your glossy eyes looked for him for a second. You shouldn’t have done that, because as you took in the sight of Joel with his own eyes closed, browns knitted, your nostrils flared, and you wondered if it was even possible to want somebody that much.
“Joel, wait, I’m– fuck,” your jaw went slack and you scrunched up your face, two of his thick fingers nudging that spot that made you see stars. “I’m close.” 
“That’s a good thing, sweetheart. Don’t know why you say it in such a dry tone,” his mouth curved into a smile, his chin and stubble shining with your slick. 
Your chest rose and fell with rapid breaths. “I don’t want to come yet.”
“But you will.”
A thing you also learned, apart from horse riding, was that Joel was a determined man.
“Joel–“
“I’ll make you come with my mouth, and then with my cock,” dizziness was starting to blur your vision, your eyelashes fluttering with every hard thrust of his fingers. You glanced up to the ceiling, tears filling your eyes. “Think you can do that for me, be my good girl and come twice?”
You bobbed your head. It was official: he was going to make you come.
Drawing in a long breath, you could feel the unbearable pressure in your core. His name sounded like a prayer on your lips, chanting it in the same way some people expressed their devotion to a certain God. You had your own personal deity, whose tongue accomplished to push you to the limit, licking every drop of your release as if it were a special kind of forbidden elixir.  
Your shoulders sagged and you relaxed under him. Joel kissed you, an open mouthed and filthy kiss crowning that moment as you panted. Through the cotton fabric of his boxers, you felt his hard-on poking your thigh. Shoving his underwear down, you took him in your hand, hot and just big, stroking him for real this time. You twisted your wrist at the tip, and he slumped forward, almost crushing you with his entire body weight, his breath dampening your neck. “Wanna fuck you, baby,” he croaked, his hips chasing your touch.
Out of all the scenarios you had ever imagined, none of them included being split open by Joel. You had a very vivid imagination, but no amount of creativity would’ve prepared you for what his cock would feel like inside of you. He bottomed out, his arms shaking where they rested on each side of your head. Joel’s breath quickened as he pulled out, just letting the tip, and then thrusting into you again.
“Fuck,” you didn’t recognize your own voice. It was even hard to decipher if you were still alive or dead from how magnificent he felt.
“So good, sweetheart. You’re so good, such a good girl,” he groaned, fucking deeper into you. His cock pulsed inside you, your cunt squeezing him. “Can’t believe how– how tight you are. You’re gonna make me lose my f–fucking mind.”
It was just too much. You hadn’t even recovered from your last orgasm before Joel started pounding into you like his life depended on it, the obscene sound of skin slapping skin ringing out in the room. 
“You gonna come, huh? Gonna make a mess?” you could sense he was also close, his pace faltering as seconds went by, words slurring together. He pressed his forehead against yours, clenching his fists and taking in a sharp breath. “Fuck. I’m not gonna last much longer, baby.”
Come inside, you wished to tell him, to feel his seed dripping out of your greedy hole, painting your walls. But you weren't on the pill; it was also the first time you were sleeping with Joel, and you didn’t know how he would take the… suggestion. “Close,” you yelped instead, tears shimmering in your eyes as Joel’s body hovered over you like the most perfect eclipse. 
His thrusts became more frenzied, if possible. “That’s it, darlin’. Come for me,” your gaze fixated upon him, his eyes flickering with hunger. “Wanna see you when you soak my cock.”
Your body went limp, your orgasm hitting you like a truck. Soreness took place in your throat as you moaned his name through the aftershocks, fireworks exploding behind your eyelids. Going rigid, you let go of Joel’s shoulders. He pulled out, mumbling something you didn’t quite catch. You fisted his cock, trying to give him the release he so yearned for. Joel kissed you, messy teeth and saliva taking part of it. Heavy on your hand, his dick twitched as you squeezed the base, roped of his warm cum splattering your belly. The scene reminded you of a painting; he was the talented painter, and you his blank canvas, waiting to be signed with his name.
It was the turn of silence now. None of you said anything for a while, until Joel used his boxers to clean up his cum from your stomach, smiling apologetically at you. “Sorry.”
“It’s okay,” your fingers delicately traced the contours of his chest as he reclined, enveloping you in the embrace of his strong arms. “Will you stay?”
Please say yes.
“Only if you want me to.”
Moral of the story: learning how to ride a horse can actually be nice if your teacher happens to be Joel Miller.
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calliesmemes · 2 months
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ASSORTED SENTENCE STARTERS FROM AROUND THE INTERNET, including quotes from Tumblr, Pinterest, TikTok, and X (formerly known as Twitter), for when a muse wants to lighten up the situation at hand.
CHANGE gendered words and in-universe phrases as needed.
SPECIFY muse for multimuses.
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“   It’s sea shanty time once again my fellow bastards of the ocean! ”
“   Partner, I reckon that I ain’t been feeling very yeehaw lately. ”
“   I don’t study; I consult the lore. ”
“   Yeah, I understand women — they all want daggers and swords. It’s all quite simple, really. ”
“   Lord forgive me but I may have to make a nonessential purchase. ”
“   Those are bold words for someone in stabbing range. ”
“   Yes I’m a gatekeeper and a hater. I’m also God’s most favorite princess and the most interesting girl in the world. ”
“   My primary motivations are fear, spite, and aesthetic longing. ”
“   Man — if I had a sword, I wouldn’t be worried about shit. ”
“   It’s not blood that runs through these veins but glitter gel pen ink. ”
“   If I was in a Jane Austen novel, I would be the one sent to the seaside for my health. ”
“   Half of me is a hopeless romantic, and the other half of me is … well … an asshole. ”
“   I am the nicest, sweetest, most rage-filled person I know. ”
“   I hope I give off the vibe to all animals that I am their ally and their friend. ”
“   I see you’re paying attention to someone who is not me. Why is that? ”
“   Normalize letting me talk without making any sense. ”
“   Don’t care, didn’t ask, plus my psychic visions have predicted the outcome of this encounter. ”
“   I could be so much worse. For example, I could start acting like my father. ”
“   Sorry for acting so strange and irregular; It will happen again. ”
“   i love sitting in my room.....alone....a girl in her cave....scheming and plotting and drinking tea. ”
“   These man made horrors are beyond YOUR comprehension. I get it though. ”
“   I’m a goth girl on the inside. On the outside? A father figure. ”
“   I don’t need to face reality; I’m not just that type of girl. ”
“   DO I LOOK LIKE I GIVE A frickle-frackle? ”
“   I’m about to cha cha real smooth off a fucking cliff. ”
“   Sorry I told you about my trauma. Do you still think I’m hot? ”
“   My priorities aren’t straight and neither am I. ”
“   I have felt permanently guilty for no reason since I was like eight years old. ”
“   Of course I have a lot of pent up rage, you fool! I’ve been the same height since I was twelve years old! ”
“   I was born for shock value. ”
“   Good morning! God has let me live another day and I’m about to make it everyone’s problem. ”
“   Oh, I slept miserably because I was tormented by terrible visions all night. I hope none of them were prophetic! ”
“   Be the surreal nonsense that you want to see in the world. ”
“   Being smart has never stopped me from being a complete fucking idiot. ”
“   My hobbies include knowing things and being right. ”
“   This is good advice, but don’t tell me what to do. ”
“   I hate the idea of authority. What the fuck is someone being superior to me? Bitch I’m gonna take your kneecaps. ”
“   Stop forgiving my crimes! I worked so hard on those! ”
“   My hobbies? Uhhhh, symbolism mostly. Metaphors and implications and the like. ”
“   I may not have any braincells, but I make up for it by having many heart cells. ”
“   I can’t mansplain manipulate manwhore my way out of this one guys! ”
“   Not all your life decisions have to be smart. Some can be purely for cinematic value. ”
“   Sometimes I wish I looked more fragile and feminine like a dainty flower, but I do enjoy looking like I hate everyone. ”
“   Any dream can be a prophetic dream if you’re willing to do some really weird shit. ”
“   girl help there is not enough enrichment in my enclosure. ”
“   BRO, you NEED to stop SUMMONING DEMONS in the FRAT HOUSE. ”
“   I just gave your address to some spiders! ”
“   I disappoint my father as a hobby now. ”
“   I think that the dark circles under my eyes add to my aesthetic actually. ”
“   Good news! I’ve successfully replaced all of my emotions with jokes! ”
“   I have half a braincell left and I’m very scared to use it! ”
“   Listen, son — in this world, it’s either yeet or be yeeted. ”
“   I appreciate the advice, but I think that I’m old enough to make my own bad decisions. ”
“   I’m disappointed in me too. Y’all aren’t special. ”
“   Running from your demons is the best exercise! ”
“   Sorry; I can’t commit any crimes with you. My mom says that I have to study. ”
“   Time flies when you don’t know what the fuck is going on. ”
“   If I run out of tacos, I can no longer maintain my human form. ”
“   Bestie, I don’t think that I can girlboss under these conditions. ”
“   Yeah I’ve had combat training; I can do anxiety attacks! ”
“   Swag is earned, not learned. ”
“   Contrary to popular belief, violence solves a lot. ”
“   I CANNOT STAND YOU ALL so I will SIT DOWN. ”
“   Please God no … I don’t need any more character development right now! ”
“   If you can’t beat ‘em, yeet ‘em. ”
“   Do not put me in a situation. I’m at my limit and I am very tired. ”
“   I may be depressed, but at least I’m not basic. ”
“   It’s MY LIFE and I’ll sabotage it myself, thank you. ”
“   Think twice? Bold of you to assume that I think once. ”
“   At the next inconvenience, I will start biting people. ”
“   Oops I think that I just experienced an emotion. ”
“   Did you know that rats spelled backwards is star? ”
“   One day, I’ll be reincarnated as a pigeon, and I’ll shit on your head. ”
“   On the outside, I’m a baddie — but on the inside, I’m a saddie. ”
“   My grandma bullies me through the Ouija board. ”
“   I’m a cool person if you can just look past my personality. ”
“   Beetles don’t have to do taxes, and I think that is a beautiful way to live. ”
“   I hope that you get your character development arc soon. ”
“   Those are some nice kneecaps … It’d be a shame if someone stole them … ”
“   I’ve wanted to be a trophy wife ever since I was a little boy. ”
“   I’m done being baby; I want POWER ”
“   Wait, “Just Standing There Ominously” doesn’t count as socializing? ”
“   Yes I am smart, and yes, I am stupid. It’s called being flexible. ”
“   I am NOT delusional!!!!! I am OPTIMISTIC! ”
“   I deserve compensation for not being the menace to society that i could be, like i'm skipping out on a lot of fun here. ”
“   Do not ask me if you should or shouldn't do something !!! Before I am a friend I am an enabler !!! ”
“   i am the WORLDS PRETTYIST PINK PRINCESS and im gonna KILL YOU WITH MY HUGE FUCKING HAMMER ”
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mcmactictac · 1 year
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I love bbc merlin so much because despite the variety of plot points that drive me insane they’re all needed for everything to play out correctly.
I hate that Merlin’s magic isn’t revealed till the very end but also recognize how incredibly powerful he is that if everyone knew their external threats just. Wouldn’t be a threat anymore.
And I hate that Arthur never repeals the ban on magic but if he did than Mordred wouldn’t have had a reason to turn and the finale would fall flat.
I can’t stand Agrivaine but I understand that Arthur being betrayed by him is necessary in order to make Merlin’s perceived betrayal hurt more. That it serves to break down Arthur’s confidence in a time where he only trusts Merlin, who brings him back to himself. Then to realize that foundation of trust he’s had has been wrong and that he has literally been deceived by every single person he lets get close to him.
I hate how they ruined morgana’s character and while I still think it could have been done with more nuance, there is literally no major antagonist besides her. Plus she’s such an interesting one because of her connections to everyone before she slipped.
I hate that merlin tries to kill her, especially like that, and so early on. I get why he does it, and I get that it’s necessary to break morgana’s trust in him. I get that the whole point is that every choice he makes is to try and stop things and he does the best he can every single time, and it’s still never enough.
I don’t always like how we get there but GOD do I love the tragedy of it. For a show that’s so happy on the surface the tragedy of knowing there’s nothing any of them can do to stop the ending is SO GOOD.
It’s devastating to watch merlin lose huge pieces of himself, watch his morals change and shift, watch as the lines he won’t cross get pushed farther and farther away. He loses so much of himself to save Arthur and he STILL LOSES ARTHUR.
And listen I can and I will complain about some of the goofy ass plots but it’s so important to me that people recognize the seriously tragic narrative at the Center of it. I could go on for AGES about how each and every one of the leads is doomed by the narrative.
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glamaphonic · 1 month
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People asked for my post on The Scene in ‘Conquer’ in light of me mentioning it in the post about the trajectory of Rick’s feelings for Michonne, so here it is.
The first thing to understand contextually is that Rick went to Alexandria for Michonne. It was for everyone. But it was for Michonne. Because she told him to. Because she took his hand and asked him if he was ready to have a home, a life, again. And he wasn’t! But he did it anyway.
So he’s in there and the PTSD is popping—hypervigilance mixing in with legitimate security concerns bcs the Alexandrians transparently don’t know how to survive if anything ever actually attacks them. He plots and he schemes and he blows his top and Michonne confronts him and Carol covers and they all agree to a path forward.
BUT THEN, Rick tells Carol: “I don’t want to lie anymore.”
And you have to understand that what he mostly means here is: “I don’t want to lie to Michonne anymore.”
Rick has just felt the brunt of her disappointment in him, felt the weight of how betrayed she feels by him not being honest with her, and it rocks him. Because he already tried to make an excuse and she shot it down. (I couldn’t tell you because you wanted this place. We all needed this place.) Because he has these Big Feelings for her sitting in his chest and he hates how it feels not being in sync with her, not making decisions alongside her, and not, when needed, being led by her.
Later when he’s back at their home, she comes in and he’s very clearly been brooding over this for a while. He confesses immediately, unprompted. He holds the gun out to her, surrendering, looking for absolution. She doesn’t take it. He makes another excuse, looking for another way to explain himself, and she shoots it down again. (I couldn’t tell you because I didn’t know what you would do. Anything I did or would’ve done would only have been for you.)
So, he finally confesses, for real. The actual truth. And this is a moment of such profound vulnerability for Rick. He gets up, he faces her, he moves close to her, looks into her eyes, and tells her in so many words that she has power over him; she has a pull on him that is so strong, it frightens him.
(Please don’t get me started on the contrast to the scene with Jessie preceding this where he goes to tell her he’s not sorry for what he did and he’s not sorry for what he’s going to do. THE BLOCKING OF THE SCENE ALONE. Infinite distance between them, him not even on camera, visible only through a distorted reflection surrounded by broken glass. PLEASE. Are you kidding me???!! That storyline overall was fumbled but there were a few moments where they did indeed pop off in terms of communicating what was actually going on.)
And Michonne, bless her heart, she completely misses this for reasons I've talked about. She ignores the actual confession that he’s making and just goes back into the argument about safety and when it’s okay to believe that you’re safe or could be. Because that’s what she’s been struggling with, trying to put down the sword and not being able to truly believe that she can or should no matter how much she wants to believe it.
So she reaffirms her loyalty to Rick, and an incredible thing happens there. When she tells him that she thinks he can find a way, he LOOKS AWAY, FRUSTRATED. Until she amends that they, together, can find a way. Then he’s back to soulful gazing into her eyes. Because Rick is just realizing here, in this moment and the moments preceding it, that he doesn’t want to be Michonne’s leader, he wants to be her partner. She tells him that she’s with him and AGAIN he offers her the gun. And again, she doesn’t take it.
To Michonne, this is a gesture of deepest trust. Despite him having lied to her, despite him being in crisis, she still believes that he’ll do the right thing in the end. She still has faith that he'll make the right choice.
To Rick, who has found himself operating on a completely different level in this conversation than she is, this is a rejection. He literally disarmed himself before her! He offered himself up to her! He told her about the power she has over him! He wanted her to take his hand and move forward with him again! But she walks away! Unwittingly leaving him there with his lil Mr. Darcy hand clenches!
So anyway god-tier scene. God-tier set up for the way their relationship would take shape once they were together. If you ever want a laugh, try to find some post-s5 interviews and watch people, esp Gimple, try to dodge around admitting how romantic that scene was lol. If you want an even bigger laugh, imagine Rick having actually leaned in and kissed her in that scene (the scene builds in such a way that it absolutely would’ve been a completely natural conclusion!!!) and how hilarious 6A would’ve been in light of it.
(Michonne would’ve FREAKED OUT and not wanted to talk about it because she’d be processing a massive amount of things all at once that she was NOT ready to process. Then they’d be dealing with the herd and Michonne would be trying to avoid Rick without seeming like she was trying to avoid him and they both especially wouldn’t want Carl to think anything was wrong. And Rick would be giving her space while trying and failing not to look like a kicked puppy whenever she was in proximity which would be all the time because of the whole living together and co-parenting two actual children and also an entire found family.)
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anadiasmount · 5 months
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Omg fake dating thrope +enemies to loverswith jude. Maybe you're both celebrities or you're a girl he knows but he needs a date to somewhere and you know
gonna use this next time i write a fic bc it’s actually one of my fav tropes/ plots… 😵‍💫😵‍💫
since we know he ‘good’ at pool, the bet is placed after the two of you kept disagreeing who was better and throwing words back and forth. but something about him looking angry, brows pulled in, eyes squinted, lips plump, just turns you on… but you would never admit to anyone…
for some ironic reason, he wins the long game of pool, that lasted for an hour. that hour where intense glances were shared, a game of determination, fury built in you as you watch the black ball roll perfectly into the slot. you stood up straighter hugging the pole tightly as he came behind you and whispered into your ear.
“keep your phone nearby. i’ll give you a call when i need you…”
you couldn’t understand why you hated him so much. maybe bc of your first interaction where he embarrassed you? maybe it was bc he acted the way he acted when he was around people that were no good for him. why he always seemed to target you to release all frustration’s. why he seemed to the first person ever in your life you questioned how you were as a friend?
you never once questioned how you treated others. but he made you question a lot just by breathing the same around around him. the tense air.
you heard him brag and nonchalantly spoke about him winning the golden boy award. that cocky smirk, arms crossed along his chest. his friends praising him while all he did was stick his tongue on the inside of his cheek and nod to all the compliments.
“what a fucking ego he has,” you said frustrated and downing a double shot in a glass. “it’s just men being men,” your friend cut in, glancing at her phone and updating you with the plans the girls had made to which you quickly agreed to, grabbing your bag and walking to the door.
“hey hey hey. where you going?” you turned confused, rolling your eyes when catching the voice. “we’re headed out. different plans,” your fiend responded avoiding hearing an arguement.
“can you tell her she’s my date to the golden boy awards? that she has to packed and ready to go by sunday night?” jude says in a taunting voice. your eyes twitch and mouth opens in disbelief when your eyes connect, scoffing at his childish manner.
“can you please tell him, that i won’t go. that i refuse to spend a whole night dedicated to him?” you turn to your friend who stares back and forth between you and jude nervously. jude laughs loudly and cocks his head to the side.
“sorry you’re not at my level sweetheart, anyone would kill to be where i am. but you still owe me a bet remember?” he said seriously, stepping closer to you. he noticed the way your nostrils slightly flare and you jaw clenches. “ok ok, we’re gonna head out now. she’ll wait for your text about the trip details…”
your friend pulled you back, before the two of you could start screaming, but your eyes were directly on his. watching his angry gaze turn soft. “have a good night,” you spit out.
you made a promise to yourself that you would speak to him when he did first. you wanted to avoid any alterations or him in general. but that quickly became harder as he kept speaking to you. maybe he was just trying to annoy you, or just wanted to make communication.
for some reason this felt different. the air shared between you wasn’t no longer tense, instead it felt lost. you saw him differently, you don’t know what changed but you couldn’t even stare at his eyes without getting intimidated or shy.
when he spoke your gaze remained on your lap or outside the window of the plane. you felt nervous to speak or to reply, your heart warmed at him, his voice, his face. you suddenly felt butterflies, the feeling of wanting to be loved…
jude couldn’t offer you that. he can’t give you what you want. jude doesn’t do relationships or love. he’s doing this because of a stupid bet the two of you agreed to. jude doesn’t feel the same way you do. jude hates you. your eyes flutter when he called your attention, breaking your daydream.
“sorry… uhm… what we’re you saying?,” you side eyed him, catching a glimpse of his confused and worried features. “are you okay? i asked if you wanted anything to eat or drink…” you couldn’t tell but jude’s voice was laced with worry.
“i’m okay. and no i’m fine for the moment,” you give him a small smile and direct your gaze to the small TV in front of you. “you’re quiet… you’re not you?” jude says, his heart now warm and with ache when you couldn’t meet his gaze. he wanted you to look at him, to see your eyes, your smile, the small beauty marks he so badly wanted to kiss.
“just want to avoid any unnecessary arguments… it’s your night after all… the last i would want is for your night to go terribly thanks to our temper,” your lips purse. “i’m confused why you brought me…” your tone was insecure, jude having to resist to reach over and take your insecurities away.
“oh.” jude wanted to smack his forehead, but he was scared to spilling his true feelings for you.
oh was all he said for the rest of the flight and ride to the hotel where the two of you began to get ready. you hated feeling something for someone you know doesn’t feel the same way. why were you this vulnerable? why did your feelings towards him have to change? why couldn’t he like even more so tolerate you?
the elevator ride down to the lobby was awkward. jude discreetly stared at you fixing your lipstick and hair in the mirror inside the elevator. butterflies invading his chest at his sight. your body beautifully carved in the black matching dress to his tux.
he couldn’t stand it no longer, especially when you bit your lip anxiously. “y/n… look at me…” his calloused hand tilted your chin to look up at him. “i feel more than honored and lucky to have you here… you look absolutely gorgeous…” he saw your iris dilate at his words. he leaned down but before your lips could touch the elevator doors opened.
you cleared your throat and swallowed the urge to pull him into a kiss. instead greeting his mother and father with a hug. “this is my gf, mom i’ve told you about her but dad here’s the girl i was telling you about on the plane.”
“it’s a pleasure to meet you. it’s also nice to put a face on the other women who keeps our jude in check,” his dad joked making you laugh, and stare at jude who had a loving look on his face. “shall we go?”
you closed your hotel room door abruptly. you expected this night to go terribly, filled with insults and comments, being caught with the lie you weren’t his real gf, but it was the opposite. the night couldn’t have gotten better, you getting along with his parents, being suddenly happy and proud for the man you thought you disliked.
you ran your head stressed along your forehead, a hand coming to your throat to hold back your tears, and massage the lump. “y/n? open the door…” you gasped taking small steps back but then opening the door where jude came inside. “i wanted to thank you. i know this was a huge favor, but i really wanted you here…”
“jude what? what are you-”
“i told myself i couldn’t fall for someone like you, that it would be a forbidden sin. that i shouldn’t think of giving my entire life to you, devoting myself to you. that it would be a jeopardy, because i thought you hated me…” jude said stepping closer to you where you backed into the dresser.
“but i can see that’s no longer the same. bc you feel exactly the way i feel,” he grabs your palm and places it directly on his heart. “my heart beats faster when i’m with you. i smile only with you. i hate thinking of the fact another man touching you… let alone talking to you… i envy that because it should be me, loving you unconditionally…”
“love is the weirdest thing to exist… but if it’s with you jude, i promise to love you unconditionally…” you say breathless, tracing his cheeks and lips with your thumb. “is that a pinky promise?” he says with a cheesy smile to which you nod.
“in that case, i promise to give you my all and be the man you deserve. because i love you unconditionally already…” he wasted no time capturing your red stained lips with his, a sigh of relief to finally have you. to taste you. to kiss you. his hand remained tugging on your hair as the kiss grew passionate and messy.
he kissed every beauty mark “i love you”, kissing down to your jaw “i love you so much”. your pulse where he sucked on the skin and hearing you whimper, “i love you and only you y/n.”
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heartilywrites · 1 month
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could you write a fluff korra x fem reader fic? i loved give in to me!!
omg hi !! im so glad you loved it 🥺 this is my first request, hope you enjoyed it and love it as much as i loved writing it!!!
♡ — Ready? Take 3! ; Korra
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resume: Korra had been wanting to tell you how she felt for quite some time now.
content warning: fluff and comfort ; fem and earthbender!reader ; for plotting reasons, Mako and Korra never had a relationship ; a long os 'cause I kinda got excited ; no use of y/n ; the only thing I described from physical looks are the eyes, but because the ppl from the Earth Kingdom have green eyes ;
word count: 2.5k
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“ 𝓘 made my mind long ago, but I still needed more time.
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Love can be such a magical thing, can't it? Falling in love with someone you appreciate, feeling like you're floating when you are near to that person, butterflies in your stomach when you have them near, an electric touch when their hands are on you, your heart beating a hundred per second. . . Okay, sometimes it may be confused with anxiety, but Korra felt that way with you. In a good way! Korra thought love would be easy to handle for her. I mean, she's the avatar! she should be able to do everything, right?
But it was hard for her to understand how it worked. She knew you since her probending days with the team, between Bolin and you were helping her with her earthbending. She realize she was in love with you on one of the practices where Bolin was absent because he felt asleep.
That time alone with you made her realized how much she loved spending time with you, how she felt complete with you near, how her heart raced when she made you laugh and how she adored having your whole attention.
So she thought about talking about it to you.
Three tries. It took her three tries to say what she wanted. The first one was at the Glacier Spirits Festival.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Who are we staring at?” Asami said over her shoulder, scaring the brunette one, making her jump in her place.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “No one!” she was quick to exclaim, but the pale girl looked the way she was and smiled excited when she saw you scolding Bolin for shoving a whole bird in his mouth. “You know, staring at her won't do anything.”
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Do what? I don’t know what you're talking about, I don’t want to do anything.” the avatar mumbled, looking away. Asami laugh softly.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Sure you don't.” she smiled, one of her arms passed the brunette's shoulders. “Let's go, I'll take Bolin from her and you can stay and do nothing.” Asami tried to copy her friend's tone while she forced the avatar to walk your way.
When the pair arrived with you, your eyes lit up at the sight of Korra. She was too nervous to notice. “Hey, I need Bolin for a couple of minutes; I brought you another companion in exchange!” the inventor spoke.
Asami shoved Korra to you and was quick to take Bolin by the wrist to take him away with a 'but, my food!' complaint from him. The avatar was quick to straighten after bumping into you, her cheeks were light pink and her smile was nervous. “Hi. . . Uhm, do you want to play the booths?” she asked timidly pointing at one with mini Aangs in it.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “I would love to!” you exclaimed and that gave Korra the courage to take you hand and walk to the booth.
The night was great, both of you were having the best time of your lives. Laughing, cheating in the most subtle way possible, eating a bunch of things until your stomach was full. She won a flying bison and a koalaotter plushies while you won a badgermole. At the end of the night, both of you were walking back to the tents where the whole group were staying at.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “You should've seen your face when the ferris wheel stopped at the top!” she had been laughing at you for about five minutes now and you couldn't resist to join her.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “I hate heights! Stop making fun of me!” you tried to defend yourself while holding your stomach. It didn't took long to get to the tents. “It was fun, Korra. I had a great night, thank you.”
The southerner smiled fondly at you before nodding. “I had a great night too. . .” both of you stayed quiet while arriving to the doorstep of the tents, but it was a comfortable silence. “Listen, I...”
The sight of your green eyes stopped her words. It was right there, that was the moment, she needed to do it.
Korra took a big breath in.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “I want you to have the koalaotter.” she said, cowering at the last second. You smiled big and took the plushie when she extended it.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Thank you!” you exclaimed admiring the plushie while Korra admired you. A moment later you extended the badgermole back at her. “Let's exchange, I want you to have it. I have something from you and you have something from me.” you said blushing hard. She accepted more than grateful and smiled at you.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “I'll take good care of it.” she said, getting a small 'I know you will' from you before waving goodbye for the night.
Maybe she had a chance?
The second time was in Zaofu.
After helping prevent the kidnapping of Korra by the Red Lotus, you were the first one to come in once the girl got her mobility back.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “My spirits, Korra!” you exclaimed running to give her a hug which was pretty much reciprocated with a bit of strength from the Avatar. “I'm glad you're okay. I got so scared.”
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Me too.” she murmured close to your ear. Seconds that felt like hours, Korra spent in your arms, breathing in your scent while she could feel how fast your own breathing was. “I'm here, don't worry.”
You separated a little bit from the hug to look at her face and smiled fondly at her, she smiled back at you. A clear of throat busted the bubble you both were in. “Go get some rest, kids, we'll be making the questioning at first thing in the morning.” Lin said, both of you looked at her and then at each other.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “I'll take her to her bed.” you told them before helping the southern stand up, you made her rest one of her arms on your shoulders and one of yours wrapped around her waist so she could lean on you completely.
The walk to Korra's room was slow, you didn't pressure her to walk faster and she thanked that in silence.
Once at her room you helped her to get in and tuck her in, giving Naga a pet when she got closer to make sure her friend was fine.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “I'm going to stay here a little bit if you need anything.” you said, sitting by her side in the bed, she smiled.
She looked for your hand which you took without a problem into yours, leaving caresses on the back of her hand with your thumb. Both of you stayed quiet, your eyes looking at the union of hands and her eyes tracing your silhouette, making sure she got your image printed in her head.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “I shouldn't ask you to come here with me. It's dangerous.” she broke the silence surrounding you both, you frowned looking up at her.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Don't be ridiculous, Korra. I know when to agree or decline to things.” you said, a bit annoyed at what you heard.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Yeah, but I put you in danger and–” you interrupted her.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “I'm here because I like being with you.” she blinked surprised. “If I can help you, I will. I appreciate you a lot, Korra, you're my friend.”
And at the noun used on her, her whole confession faded away. You looked at her as a friend, she thought. She sighed and nodded. “You need to rest, we have people to question in a couple of hours.” the avatar responded, smiling a little bit. You nodded, standing up and making the attempt to walk out. The hand she had intertwined with yours pulled you back, you looked at her surprise. “Let's do a sleepover, yeah?” she made space on the bed.
You thought about it for a second before smiling and accepting the offer, it took both of you a great amount of three minutes to fall asleep, facing each other, feeling at ease with the presence of the other.
The third time was three years after saying goodbye to her, she was going back to the Southern Water Tribe. She said she needed time to herself, you send her letters everyday, getting letter back every couple of weeks and one day it suddenly stopped.
You didn't thought much of it, maybe she was just preparing everything to come back to the city and you didn't had time either to think about it.
Once you were told Kuvira's plan to attack Zaofu, you went back to the city in a try to help Suyin. After all, she helped you learn how to metalbend and you felt like that was the least you could do.
You arrived a couple of hours before Korra, but didn't cross her way since after talking to Suyin you got to an emergency training taught by the twins to make sure your metalbend was sharp.
After that, you got to sleep since the twins got the best out of you in just hours, missing the reunion with the avatar and got woken up by Wing saying they needed help to take Kuvira from the camp outside Zaofu, and so you did. Then got captured.
On your suit you narrowed your eyes at the silhouettes facing Kuvira. They shot back open in surprise. “Korra!?”
The avatar's heart raced, the feelings she ignored all that time resurfaced when she saw you. Trapped. You were moving desperate to get out of the trap. “Dear spirits, no...” she murmured to herself, the girl stayed in line, she tried not to freak out and attack Kuvira at that moment, she needed to come to an agreement.
The southerner could feel your gaze on her, she was desolate trying to win the fight to get you out of there. To have you in her arms and hold you tight. To tell you how much she missed you.
But the luck wasn't on her side that day and she lost. You watched how the flying bison got away with tears in your eyes, wishing, hoping to get a chance with her.
The next days captured with the Beifongs were... An experience. You were so grateful when you saw Lin, Bolin and Toph appear, you were the second one to get out and helped as much as you could to get out of the factory safe.
You were behind Suyin, Bolin and Zhu Li when they interrupted the president's meeting. When Korra laid eyes on you she was quick to hug you, a strong grip between the both of you.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “I'm so glad to see you.” you said in a sigh, it almost felt like a weight fell off your shoulders.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “I am too... You have no idea how much I missed you.” she said back, after a while you two took a step back. “I need to tell you something.”
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “It will have to wait, we have big problems.” even though you stopped her from talking and made her pay attention to Zhu Li, you took her hand. You needed to feel her touch to make sure it was her and not another dream.
Since the matter was life or death, both of you were able to put on hold the confessions to have your head in the game and survive whatever Kuvira threw at you. Plans were made, groups designated and goodbyes said from one group to another. It felt like the end of something, but everyone was so hopeful for a good ending.
And you were too, but you needed to do something before.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Hey, Korra, I need to talk to you.” you called the southerner, pulling the girl by the hand a little bit farther from the group. “Okay, listen, I've been trying to tell you this for years now, but I just couldn't–”
Your words got caught up in your mouth when you felt the lips of the girl infront of you press into yours. It was a sweet kiss, full of emotions coming from both sides and a bit desperate in the act.
Her lips knew their way around yours, it was almost like you two already knew how to exchange that gesture. Her hands found their way in your waist just as yours rest confidently in her shoulders, she pulled you as close to her as the anatomy would allow.
Once both yours and her lungs where burning in need of air, you pulled away. She rest her forehead in yours, her eyes were still closed for a bit before opening them and stumbling into your gaze. The one she had been loving since you arrived to her life, she smiled.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “I love you.” she confessed finally, your cheeks were just as red as hers and you let a light giggle left your mouth. “I love you so much, since you first stomped in my feet at the probending gym.” your face got even more red at the memory. “I'm sorry for disappearing and for not writing you back enough, I just... I needed time to heal.”
You shook your head a bit, reassuring her with a little smile. “It doesn't matter, you are here, you are okay and I couldn't ask for more... I love you too, Korra, I always had.” the avatar could swear her heatbeats were loud enough for everyone on the place to hear them.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Once this is done I want to take you out. You and me alone.” she said before finally taking a step back from you, taking your hand into hers.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Sounds like a date.” you agreed before leaving a small peck in her lips.
And then, the final battle took place.
People were flying here and there. You learned to use the metal wires and took Bolin or Mako up and down when needed, so it was safe to say once the Colossus was defeated and Kuvira arrested you were tired to your bones. There you stood, with the whole group, taking a break.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Alright, excuse me.” Korra said walking to you and hugging you by the waist while giving you a kiss. You could hear gasps, both of surprise and excitement.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “WHAT!?” Bolin screamed with his jaw dropped, Mako had almost a same expression meanwhile Asami, Jinora and Ikki where smiling excited, Ikki was jumping in her place.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “I heard we will be going to a wedding.” you said once you both ended the gesture, referring to Zhu Li and Varrick's wedding when Varrick showed off his fiancee's ring while looking for Korra after the portal opened. “Wanna be my plus one?”
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Ooh, I would love to.” she giggled before turning to everyone else. “. . .I think we should get out of here.”
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “AREN'T YOU GOING TO TELL US HOW DID THIS HAPPENED!?” Bolin continued to scream.
‍ ‍ ‍ ‍‍ “Oh, they will. They have to or I'm going to make them.” Asami said, Mako laughed.
Maybe it was worth it to wait all those years for one of you to take the step, all the yearning and adoration for one to another made the result of that waiting so sweet, just as both of you had been dreaming of.
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minicoffee00 · 7 months
Text
Fast Changes Part 3 - Azriel x Reader
Plot: You are Feyre’s younger twin and get sent into the Cauldron with your sisters coming out as high fae. What happens on this journey
Warnings: MAJOR FLUFF
Part 1 Part 2
Feyre had left her again, when Y/N needed her more than ever.
She was all but a hallow shell when Rhysand had winnowed her back. Nesta was angry at the world, wouldn’t let anyone come near her two sisters. She kept on fighting Cassian, whenever he kindly offered a window opened or freshly baked goods from Nuala and Cerridwen to the pair of silent sisters.
Elain did however converse even though it was in complicated riddles that’s no one could really get their minds around, whereas Y/N was just an empty pit.
It wasn’t that she didn’t want to talk, but when she had tried she could feel everyone’s excitement in the room and the emotions were far to overwhelming. So she kept to herself in her room as much as possible.
She would stand out in the balcony, looking over the city. The breeze was nice and kept the emotions at bay for a while. Kept her mind peaceful.
Azriel however, now healed couldn’t stay away. When she was on her balcony he would come onto his and just watch her. But after a few minutes her head would tilt on its side to gaze at him. It was almost as if she was judging him.
“Your empty” she had voiced one day when he had come back from a day of torture in the Hwen City.
When she was around Nesta, all she could feel was her constant anger, and she hated it. When she was around Cassian he was hurting, for many reasons and it gave her a headache being near him. Rhysand always had this sort of longing and pain when she was around him and she knew it was for Feyre. Elain had this fear yet curiosity that was less painful then everyone else.
Azriel however, she could never feel his emotions like he was empty inside like her too.
For a time she thought he was until today when he come onto the balcony. His emotions didn’t scream anything it was empty like usual, but his face was like thunder and the way he carried himself showed her he was feeling something.
“Sorry” he asked a shocked look coming up into his face. Again emotions she couldn’t feel, but she could see it just like anyone else.
“Everyone else is so loud at what they are feeling. Your the only one who doesn’t hurt” she says softly, edging closer to his part of the balcony.
He takes in her far off gaze even though she is seemingly looking right at him.
“Can i come over to you please?” He asks again so so softly.
“Yes I guess some peaceful company might be okay” she admits. Azriel opened his line up to Rhys saying he had started to get you to talk.
Should I come over? He had asked scraping at Azriel’s walls attempting to see what he was seeing.
No I can’t explain it now but I’ll come see you later. I’m making progress please don’t come interrupt. Azriel rushed out, hoping not to offend his High Lord.
Rhys slips away with all but an okay, leaving Azriel to do what he can.
Azriel flies over to her side of the balcony, touching down lightly not how he usually would.
He watches as she observes over him, she gets closer. Looking at every inch of his face. He cocks his head to the side wondering what she was looking at.
“Can i” she asks holding her hand up, he nods understanding what she meant. With that confirmation she started to explore him. She started with his hand. Holding it up and linking her fingers through his, she felt a jolt in her hand, like something was being pulled. She just couldn’t make out what.
Her fingers traced up his arm, still feeling nothing but that tug, no emotions just a nice silence she hadn’t received in a while.
She traced her hand up across his chest to where his heart beat. Then up across his collar bone and to his throat.
Azriel could have whimpered at the sensation. Her hands were so careful and soft the way they moved and there was something loving about them that he had yearned for, for over four centuries.
As she got to his neck, she tilted his neck up, and their eyes met and for Azriel it was like he felt the bond snap for him all over again. Tears coming to his eyes remembering the night he’d first felt it snap.
“What is that” she asks a weird sensations going through her that has her leaning in closer. She continues up tracing across his lips, his nose, his cheekbones and up to his forehead.
She then takes his hand before pulling on it, directing them both to the floor on their knees. She leant forward, placing her forehead on his, her last attempt to feel something from him. His emotions.
“This tugging i feel, what is it. It’s … painful, when I pull away?” She queries looking up at him.
“That’s the bond between us, we are mates” he explains softly.
“Like Feyre and Rhysand?” She asks, a doe eyed look on her.
“Yes like Feyre and Rhys” he smiles.
“Is that why I can’t feel you, like the others?” She asks
“Im not sure how your abilities work that the cauldron gave to you. But yes that could be why. But I can open my walls to you, as my mate so you can feel me” he offers making her shake her head and pull herself into him. Her head resting into his neck, a large intake of breath coming from Azriel.
“Please not yet. Your the only person I don’t feel like my head is going to explode around” she cries into him, his arms and wings envelope around her. Encasing her into him and his shadows.
“How does the mate bond work?” She asks.
“Let’s not worry about that for now, let’s worry about getting you better” he says sadly yet selflessly. Of course he wanted Y/N to accept the mate bond, more than anything.
But she was the priority.
“Will you leave me if I don’t accept you as my mate now?” She asks looking at him with those eyes that could bring an army of men to their knees in seconds.
“Never, im never going anyway”
A/N:
Omg guys what’s going to happen next!
315 notes · View notes
teyamsatan · 11 months
Text
𝕄𝕠𝕟𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝕀𝕟 𝕄𝕖 | ℂ𝕙𝕒𝕡𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝕀𝕍: 𝕀𝕥'𝕤 𝕀𝕟 𝕐𝕠𝕦𝕣 𝕀𝕞𝕒𝕘𝕖 𝕀'𝕞 𝕄𝕒𝕕𝕖
Pairing: Neteyam x (f)Omaticaya!Reader
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synopsis: Neteyam's actions leave you aching and shamed, and life is made difficult by your attempts to avoid him at all costs, until it dawns on you that, much like your entire relationship, nothing good ever happens without reciprocation.
warnings: 18+ minors DNI, aged-up! Neteyam/Reader, enemies-to-lovers, angst (mentions of violence, battle, blood, death), smut (oral - m receiving, orgasm denial), strong language, neteyam and reader being horrible to each other lol
wc: 6.4k words
a/n: we're in it now, besties. the plot thickens, much like reader/neteyam's steamy enmity and desire for each other. i hope you enjoy this chapter, and as always, thank you for asking to be tagged, commenting, sending me asks, it really keeps me going and i appreciate you so so much (thank you very much also to @cinetrix for her amazing Neteyam art and the prompt which inspired me so much and got me out of my writer's block ily bestie x)
na'vi compendium: yawne - beloved, Tsakarem - Tsa'hik in training, ketuwong - alien, txepvi  - spark, teylupil - teylu-face, kurkung - asshole, skxawng - idiot, eveng - child, tsìltsan rewon - good morning, Oel ngati kameie - I see you, sa'nok - mother, ite - daughter, srane - yes, kä - go, Olo'eykte - female Olo'eyktan, tam-tam - calm, mawey - calm, oare - moon
: ̗̀➛ previous chapter (x) : ̗̀➛ series masterlist (x) : ̗̀➛ series playlist (x)
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I'm only whatever you make me And you make me more and more a villain every day But you don't know, you reap, you sow Whatever you give to me, from yourself, you take Well, if you're a hater, then hate the creator It's in your image I'm made
The absence of his fingers, of him, from you, as he abandoned you, with your thoughts and insecurities, left you in a state of deep shock and shame - so much so, it took a good hour to finally get the strength to move the few steps it took to get to your tent.
Your mind was spinning with more thoughts then it could process, and as you continued worrying about the consequences of your actions, about all the ways Neteyam would find new ways to torture you and make you miserable, as you reeled from the ache that settled deep in your core from the emptiness he left behind, as you tried to understand the convoluted ways his mind worked and the reason he would ever do something like this to begin with, you found consciousness slipping away from you and in no time, you were asleep, taunted by dreams that you couldn’t find in you to call nightmares anymore, dreams about him finishing the job. At least in these dreams, you were safe, and he was nice, and his touch healed instead of breaking you further and further each day. You realise now it’s not what happens in these dreams that makes you think of them as nightmares, it’s the reality juxtaposed against them that sours their taste on your mind. It’s funny how even the purest, happiest moments can turn to ashes in your mouth when the backdrop is haunting and inimical. 
It was evening when you woke, and the headache that accompanied your newfound conscious state was heightened by Lo’ak’s harsh voice, as he shook you back to a reality that still ached, that couldn’t have been better than the fantasies you just left behind. 
“Lo’ak, stop shaking her, just give her a second.”
“Look, we have no time for pleasantries. She’s going to thank me for this.” 
“Teylupil. Kurkung. Skxawng.” You curse in a hoarse, barely audible whisper, eliciting a laugh from Kiri and an exasperated groan from her little brother. 
“Is this how you talk to the man that’s going to save you from an evening of misery?” 
“What’re you talking about, you irksome little -“ 
“Just get up and I’ll tell you. What’re you doing asleep at this hour anyway?” 
“Kiri, remove your brother before I remove him, and take one or two fingers with me.” 
“Come on, Lo’ak, let’s make sure you’re still alive by Eclipse.” 
You rose from your mat with a small wince as your head throbbed in pain. 
“Are you alright?” Kiri’s hand was cold and soothing against your skin, and you placed your own hand on top of hers, grateful that she was here, if not for anything else, to dilute the intensity of Lo’ak’s personality while you were still recovering your strength. You couldn't look at your two favourite Sully siblings properly, not when the shame stung and dulled your senses, not when their eyes would remind you of his, and what you did.
“I’m fine, just… tired. I… broke up with O’i’en. Or actually, I guess he broke up with me.”
“Shit. Did he find out?” 
You considered how much you should tell your friends about what transpired, knowing they’d have questions, knowing the answers might lead to more questions, some of which you couldn’t possible begin to explain. 
“Yeah… Neteyam told him.”
“Fuck. I still don’t know what you possibly ever did to make Neteyam, who happens to be the most boring and calm person to walk this planet, so angry at you.”
You scoffed at Lo’ak’s statement, so obvious and speaking to a mystery that has plagued you for the last 7 years. 
“Yeah… I love living my life paying for an imaginary slight he feels the need to remind me of every day.” 
He thought about it for a second, his fingers stroking his chin in an obviously exaggerated contemplative manner. 
“How do you know it’s imaginary if you don’t know what it is?” 
The roll of your eye reminded you briefly of the headache that tried you, and how it was getting worse with each passing second you had to entertain this conversation. 
“Look, even if it’s not, don’t you think it’s a little extreme?”
With a raise of his shoulders, Lo’ak continued.
“I guess… but it’s not like you make it easier for yourself.”
You felt your anger picking up speed, making your pulse quicken and heat rise in your cheeks. 
“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” 
“I mean, you are just as bad to him. You’re both horrible to each other. Don’t get me wrong, it’s hilarious and we all get a kick out of it, but - OUCH, KIRI!” Lo’ak yelped in pain as soon as his sister’s elbow found its way in his ribs, and the theatrics continued as he collapsed on his side, until his head was on your lap. 
“You’re the worst.”
“I still maintain my view that you both just need to fuck. Maybe this mateship is going to be the solution to all your problems.” 
The flush of your cheeks brought about by anger only deepened at his words, that instilled memories that you still didn’t know whether you were trying to forget or imprint on your brain, memories that had no business flashing in front of your mind’s eye now, memories that might infer the beginning of the end of the world: Lo’ak finally being right about something. 
“Yeah, cause what successful lifelong commitment hasn��t started with two people who despise each other?” You didn’t want to harp on a subject that you’d do everything to never have to talk about again, so you quickly changed the subject. 
“Moving on. Why are you guys here?”
The two siblings exchanged awkward looks.
“Mum, dad and grandma were talking about you and Neteyam… about the ceremony and everything.” You could tell Kiri felt uncomfortable talking about the subject, and you were happy at least one of them was sensitive to the situation. “They want to sit you both down and pick a date. Grandma said something about the sooner the better. We thought you’d rather eat a Talioang tongue than do that, so we came to give you a heads up.”
Well, so much for changing the subject. You groaned, moving Lo’ak out of the way so you can raise your knees and place your head in between them, trying to make the world stop shaking and your heart stop trying to escape out of your chest. This can’t be happening. Not so soon.
“What did Neteyam say?” 
“Neteyam hasn’t returned home, which isn’t like him. Have you seen him at all today?” 
“No.” You lied. 
That was weird. Why would Neteyam not return home? It’s not like he had any reason to hide, unlike you. You’d think he’d be the first one back in the tent, waiting to see if you’d show up for dinner, with a smug smirk plastered on his face, so ready and willing to taunt you for your momentary lapse in judgement and for being able to rub in the fact he won one more battle in your never-ending war, that until now was even, but now, felt completely thrown off balance. 
“Do you want to get out of here?” The magic words, spoken to you almost like in a dream, pulling you out of your intense musings about the speaker’s older brother. 
“It’s almost eclipse. You’re gonna get in trouble.” 
Lo’ak snickered and rolled his eyes, almost upset that you would ever think that’s something he should care about.
“Come on. We can go to the labs, chill with the humans for a night.” 
“As tempting as that is, I don’t think aiding and abetting the Olo’eyktan’s kids to leave after curfew is going to improve my situation in any way. You should go back. I’ll see you tomorrow.” 
Lo’ak huffed and puffed, but did as he was told, not before he left you with one last nugget of information.
“By the way, Norm and Max intercepted some new intel about a mission the ketuwong are planning. It’s in two days. Dad wants us all in strategy meetings and training all day tomorrow. That includes you. As soon as eclipse is over.” 
“Roger that. Now go.” You kissed both of them on their foreheads, and watched as they left you with your thoughts. 
Questions and worries plagued your mind, all, like most times, revolving around the oldest Sully sibling. Ponderations of how or why, of when or what, all swirling, all fluttering away, none of them settling enough to be thought about in detail, all of them flailing about, knocking every other thought from your consciousness until you were a panted mess of breaths and ringing heartbeats. You couldn’t be here.
Curfew has always been more of a suggestion to you than an order, so with that mentality deeply embedded in you still, you picked up your knife and bow and made your way out, walking past the Sully tent and into the thick forest, to a place you haven’t been in since that night Mo’at announced your engagement. You tried to shake the unnerved feeling that still haunted you as you remembered what last transpired there.
As you trekked past foliage and snuck past apex predators that were out hunting for the night, you eventually reached the meadow you've always loved so much. You didn't have time to breathe out a sigh a relief as you noticed a navy blue form turned away from you, toned, muscular back full on display. You would always recognise this body and the man who inhabited it, now and forever, as long as you would live, but still, you almost couldn't believe what your eyes were clearly showing you.
Neteyam was deep in thought as his feet dangled in the lake in which you liked to bathe and relax normally, that used to be a sacred place for you, one more thing he ruined in the time you've known him. He didn't hear you, you realise suddenly, and you were glad. He was the last person you wanted to see and you didn't know what you were feeling in this moment as you watched him, so unlike the Neteyam you always got to experience, so far removed from the man that always had his guard on around you, that was smug and arrogant, and primed to hurt you with every possibility that presented itself to him. This felt more like the Neteyam you used to know and love, that everyone else still gets to know and love, that you hear so much about on a day to day basis - the peaceful Neteyam, the considerate and shy Neteyam, the golden son, the epitome of what made the Omaticaya special.
You stayed hidden in the shrubbery that concealed the meadow, just watching him, and as the time continued, you found yourself relaxing, your own thoughts percolating and settling one at a time, until you processed as many of them as you had the strength to. A few things became clear to you. The priority right now were the Sky People. You had to fight, and you had to do it well - too many people relied on you for you to give anything else than your 100%. Neteyam was a distraction you couldn't afford - not right now, and not until this was done. Avoiding him at all costs seemed like the smart thing to do. Revenge could wait... for a little while. You pushed the reminder of the ceremony discussion from your brain. You didn't have enough power to consider the implications of the talk the Sully patriarch and matriarchs wanted to have with you and Neteyam. It was too soon.
Other things, you were more confused about than ever. In the end, you left with more questions than you came with, leaving him to his own devices, knowing you'll soon regret not having gotten at least a couple hours sleep before the two days ahead, both difficult, both with enough power to take more from you than you were willing to ever lose.
Why is he here?
What is he thinking about?
Were you on his mind at all?
Did you even want to be?
Could you stand it if you weren't?
You made it back to the village right as Jake and Neytiri came out, a sleepy, uncooperative Lo'ak following close behind.
"Ma eveng, tsìltsan rewon. Oel ngati kameie."
"Oel ngati kameie, sa'nok."
Neytiri made her way to you with wide, gentle steps. She always reminded you of these humans you once saw in a video the scientists showed you when you were younger, called ballerinas. She had so much poise, so much gentle, quiet power, that you have tried to emulate your entire life. Despite it paining you to admit, Neytiri was more your mother, more a role model, than your own mother ever had been. When she reached you, her hands found your face, that she stroked gently, running her thumbs under your eyes.
"Please tell me you've slept, 'ite."
Your tail stilled midair as you were caught red-handed, and you knew you either had to lie, a concept only familiar to you after being around humans, and one that you have to admit you found useful in certain circumstances, or deal with a long lecture, that you were much too tired for.
"Srane, sa'nok."
She gave you a skeptical look, one that told you she didn't quite believe you, but knew better than to probe, at least not in front of the Olo'eyktan, who would give you the ass kicking of a lifetime if he knew you weren't going to give your 110% over the following days.
"Kä. Get your bow and quiver and meet us on the training grounds."
You did as you were told, changing quickly while you were at it, realising briefly you have been in the same garbs for a long time now, something your mum would have told you off about. She always looked her best, always beautiful and presentable, always the most sought-after woman in the village. She had no grand aspirations, not like you, or like your father, who wanted nothing more for you than to be a warrior and a fighter, to be the best of the best, the best of them all. If it was up to him, you would be Olo'eykte. You tried to make both of them proud in their own ways - your mother, by continuing her secret weaving technique and always wearing the special garbs that only your family knew how to make, and your father, by becoming the pride and prodigy of your clan, and sharing that title with only one other person, none other than the prince of the Omaticaya.
Your heart picked up pace as you reached the grounds and in front of his parents stood Neteyam, looking perfect as always, not a single stray hair on his head, his braids flowing softly in the wind and chiming when the beads adorning them knocked into each other. You've always loved Neteyam's hair. It was always perfectly braided, and so weirdly emotive and... alive, sometimes looking like it moved on its own accord, a little like the tail that you saw moving in a circle, a sign he was not happy - what else was new?
When Jake spotted you, he nodded in your direction, which made everyone's attention shift to you, including his, and when his eyes trailed over your body, widening minutely, mouth slightly agape, you felt your cheeks burn and ears twitch nervously. He gained composure as quickly as he lost it, the slightly taken aback expression far removed from the one now displayed on his face, that he reserved for you, that you hated with every fibre of your being. The moment of vulnerability you witnessed yesterday was long gone, replaced by his usual contempt he liked to emanate as soon as you entered his personal bubble. You wondered if he was gonna rub your nose in it, if he was going to declare it to the world, let his friends know that you were another name to add to the catalogue of women he's fucked, or if he wouldn't want anyone to know - his little secret, only for his twisted mind to keep and thrive on. Your own mind tortured you with scenarios, each one worse than the last, before Jake pulled you out of your nightmarish thoughts.
"Kid. Come on, now, you can't go all mellow on me today. Tomorrow's a big one, I need you here, I need you with me. Can I count on you?"
"Yes, sir."
By the end of the day, that now went well into the night, you were more tired than you could remember being in years, and between the strategising meetings, the weapon training, the military drill exercises, and the hand to hand combat that Jake insisted would, at some point in your life, become useful, your brain was fried and your body sore and covered in mud and twigs.
The dirt that covered every inch of you was the kind which would stick to your skin and your hair for days on end, without any sliver of hope that it could get removed. You knew your braids were ruined, and so were your garbs, that you worked so hard for, that were all you had left of your family and your ancestors. It was a good day, you tried to remind yourself. A successful day. That’s all that mattered -not your clothes, nor the man that you were trying to avoid like he was a plague, or his gaze, or the heat that emanated from his body, or the memory of his fingers or his torturous ministrations. 
“Good job today, both of you. Now go wash the muck off of you at the river and be back in 30 minutes so we can go over it and discuss what went right and what could have gone better. Dismissed.” 
“Um- can I go to the lake instead?” The thought of being alone with Neteyam made your skin crawl. Is that what that was? It had to be. Skin crawling… yes, not goosebumps and shivers down your spine. Skin crawling…
You cringed a little at Jake’s expression, and his raised eyebrow which most of the time, and especially now, indicated annoyance or grievance.
“The lake is far, plus you wouldn’t be able to make it back in 30 minutes, kid. And it’s still dark. Is there a reason the normal river is not to your taste anymore?” 
Your tail stopped in its tracks at his slight admonishment, ears pushed back so far, they were flat against your head. You hated disappointing Jake, almost as much as you hated Neteyam. 
“No, sir.” 
At the sight of you, Jake’s expression melted away and was replaced with a soft smile, one exclusively reserved for his kids. He approached you quietly and patted your head affectionately.
“That’s what I thought. Now come on, off you go, you little troublemaker.” 
It was a short trek to the river that most Na’vi used as a personal bathing station, that was now deserted for the night. The training lasted longer than expected, and you knew eclipse would be over in a short couple of hours. You felt Neteyam’s eyes boring into your back and you did everything in your power to forget that he was there, but alas, it was near impossible when his presence overwhelmed your every sense, when it took over any thought in your mind, when the embarrassment of your encounter still rings painfully in you, telling you to run, or hide, or get your petty little revenge so he stopped having the upper hand in this scenario. The latter option, much as it has for years now, seems like the most obvious, the most alluring one. 
The devious plan, that was just a slight variation of his own, as it usually was, was taking a more defined form in your mind with each passing second, especially after remembering the little human snap bracelets that were stronger than any Na'vi rope you owned, that were light and easy to carry, and that you conveniently happened to have in the little pouch that dangled from your waist. You just needed the perfect opportunity, and you believed in making your own luck.
Without looking behind you, you got into the river, purposefully bending until your hands reached your ankles, that you started rubbing and cleaning, taking your time as you moved slowly upwards, your ass fully on display for the male you knew would be watching, as he, too, was cleaning the day off him.
"Can you be any more obvious, yawne? You might as well have a 'fuck me' sign plastered all over you. Is that all it took, three fingers in that pretty cunt and you forgot you hate me?"
You ignored his words and continued cleaning yourself, until you were so squeaky clean, someone could eat off your body, which now, you felt like you craved more than food itself.
When you were done, you got out of the river, once more trying to be as sensual and inviting as you could, and you smirked as you heard him get out as well, his presence inundating your senses as he approached you, the way it always did.
"Are you finally going to apologise and behave? I knew you would event-"
You quickly turned and pushed him backwards, until he fell, a pained gasp escaping his lips as his back made contact with a tree. The snap of the cuffs was more satisfying than you would ever care to admit as they tightened around his hand, and almost as satisfying to you as his realisation of what you’ve done, of the fact that he was trapped, at your disposal, at your mercy. 
“Let me out.” The growl he let out was low and feral, unamused at best and frightening at worst. Lucky for you, you’ve never really been scared of Neteyam. The smirk that blossomed on your face deepened as you watched him, squirming and pulling at the cuffs with all his might, getting angrier with every second he couldn’t untie himself. His tail was moving furiously behind him, slapping his calf with erratic, uncoordinated movements. 
“You know, Neteyam... For far too long now, it felt like you had control over our dynamic. I hated it, every day, feeling weaker than you. When you came and grabbed me by the throat, it was the first time in my life I almost felt scared of you. When you came and told O’í'en about us, I felt almost like life was slipping away from my grasp and you were the quicksand through which it was falling. When you… when we-“ it took you a while to compose yourself and subside the purple stain of your cheeks as you remembered how he left you. “You made me feel things I have never felt before. And then you left. And I felt almost ashamed. I had just got out of a serious relationship, I broke someone’s heart, and all I could think of, was your fingers. I felt weak, and I hate feeling weak.”
You took advantage of the way he was entranced by your words, too focused on you for anything else, and took his other hand and tied it on an opposing branch.
“Fuck! Let me go!” His legs were thrashing in front of him as he struggled to undo the human contraption, but if there’s one thing you learned, is that humans knew how to imprison and hurt other beings the best, and for once, you didn’t mind taking a page from their books.
“Tsk tsk tsk… no, Neteyam, what do you say?” 
“Fucking let me go, you little -“
“Mmm…” you pretended to think about it for a while. “No… i don’t think that’s it. Y’want to try again?” 
He hissed at you, a hiss that sounded more like a roar than anything else, and heat ignited in your core at its sound, mighty and powerful, wild and untamed. Still, you kept your composure and the sweet smile that you knew would anger him further.
“No, that’s not either. You say ‘please’.” 
You knelt in between his thighs, thick and muscular, and put a hand on each one, steadying yourself as you found yourself on your knees, heart thundering in your chest at your plan, that, despite the adrenaline, seemed more and more deranged with every passing second. His breath stilled at your touch, as did his body, his legs now limp on either side of you. His expression shifted, from one of unadulterated anger to pure shock, and a flicker of muted awe, eyes wide and mouth agape, canines tucked away behind his beautiful lips, that he wet with a swipe of his tongue. 
“What are you doing?” 
“What do you think I’m doing, Ne-te-yam?” 
Your fingers dug in the meat of his lower limbs, thumb trailing over his inner thighs as you moved upwards, massaging him, stopping right before the part of him you itched to touch most, smiling to yourself as his breath laboured with every inch transversed. You wrapped your slender digits around his loincloth, making quick work of the knot that would have been safe from most other people, but not you - you and Neteyam learnt this knot together, back when you were still you and he was still him. Back when he loved you. No matter how much he wanted to forget you and what you meant to each other, he would never be able to, because you’ll always be there to use those memories - that he banished from the night of his mind - against him. 
“You see, Neteyam… I’m not the most creative person, unlike you.”
His cock sprung free and you swallowed a gasp along with the saliva that gathered instantly in your mouth. He was huge, and for the first time in your life, you found yourself thinking… pretty, too. There was something almost ethereal about him, deep contrasted stripes running alongside his length, the pattern of his luminous freckles so exciting, you wanted to run your fingers… or your tongue, over them, connecting them with your mind to uncover the pattern it would form, one you wouldn’t mind getting to know over and over again, until it was imprinted into you, into your skin, into your mouth.
You looked at him, back against the bark of a tree, just as yours had been before, his arousal, that he tried to hard to mask on his face, given away by the endless pits that were his pupils, which almost completely swallowed his beautiful golden-green irises. 
“Let. Me. Go. Or I swear to Eywa, I will make you pa-“ 
“Pay, yes, yes.. I’ve heard the speech before. And you know what? I know you’ll make me pay. You’re good at that. You like to think of these new ways to ruin my life, all inventive and new, all of them difficult to stomach and so, so pleasurable for you at the time, aren’t they? Yes… I’m not very creative, so keep in mind that anything I ever do, is your burden to carry… yawne. You made me, everything you hate about me, everything I hate about myself…”
You wrap your fingers around his cock, hard and throbbing under your touch, and watch as he throws his head back and lets out a small, intemperate groan.
“… I learnt from you.” 
Slowly, you start moving up and down along his shaft, taking your time, observing every twitch of the muscles of his face, all the ways he was trying to refrain himself from giving into the pleasure that was wearing his resolve down. His eyes were so tightly shut, you wondered if it hurt, and you hoped it did. You hoped it all hurt, just as it hurt you. You turn your attention back to his cock, that was throbbing in your hand, and noticed the glowy liquid now covering the slit of his pink-purplish mushroomy tip. 
“Am I making you feel good, yawne? I must be, since you’re dripping all over my fingers.” The sense of deja-vu couldn’t be lost on the male writhing beneath you, and you hoped every second of the incident was playing through his mind, like it has been in yours, ever since it happened. Not being able to contain yourself any longer, you sank down until your lips wrapped around him, the sweet taste of his precum staining your tongue as you swirled it around his tip, licking it clean. The moan that escaped him was music to your ears, erotic and sonorous and so unbridled, despite his best efforts, that it spurred you on, that it made you want to explore every inch of him until every striation of his cock was imprinted on your throat. 
And so you did. Your mouth stretched to accommodate for his length and girth, too big for even your best efforts, and your hand wrapped around his base to reach what your mouth couldn't. You gagged as his hips bucked upwards, driving his cock deeper down your throat, until the tip was tickling the back of it. You stopped yourself from thinking about your heart skipping alternate beats as soon as his tail wrapped tightly around your thigh, almost as if claiming you, bringing you closer to him, attaching himself to you, almost if his body was telling you a secret he tried his hardest to repress, one that he could never speak out loud.
You could tell he was itching to free his hand, to entangle his fingers in your hair and use you as his own personal toy. He was itching for the control he desperate craved when it came to you, that you denied him, that you now had over him, that made him weak and puny under your touch.
You hallowed your cheeks as you devoted everything you had to sucking him off, the saliva pooling down his shaft and balls facilitating the bob of your head, that got faster and deeper the longer you did it, the longer his moans, that could no longer be contained inside of him, filled your favourite meadow and your ears, nestling in your body and making their way to your core, that ached and throbbed, that begged you to ride his cock until you were both just a limp mess of limbs on the mossy ground. Your movements met his synchronously, working in perfect harmony, as his heels dug into the ground and he started wildly thrusting in your mouth, his self-control long gone, as the pleasure reached new zeniths and you knew he was close to orgasm.
"F-fuck! Fuck, oh, please!"
Hearing him beg brought you to the brink of your own release, and with a couple more strokes, you released him from your mouth with a pop, sucking on his tip just a little extra, as if he was your own personal lollipop, just like the ones Norm introduced you to as a child. This one was so much better, though.
His eyes opened wildly as the lack of stimulation registered in his mind, chest heaving and mouth open, tail untangling from your body and thrashing violently, as the high came crashing down abruptly, just like yours had. You smiled, flicking your index finger over your lips and chin, gathering the remnants of his arousal before you closed your lips over it, sucking on it enthusiastically, eyes locked onto his own, dark and feral, and for the first time in a really long while, completely lost in you.
“You taste fucking amazing, tsxepvi. Maybe next time, if you apologise and behave, you’ll actually get to cum.” 
You got up from your spot on the ground, removing your knife from its sheath and bringing it to one of the cuffs that looked like it had marked his wrist, and with a careful swipe, you freed him. Without sparing him a second look, you turned around and walked away, speaking as you left him, still shackled by one hand, naked and vulnerable, happy with yourself, unwilling to consider yet again the consequences of your actions and how the fear of retaliation, that you knew would be painful and ghastly, would hit you with enough intensity to cower you, just as soon as the adrenaline wore off.
"I trust you can get yourself untied... yawne. See you on the battlefield."
A few hours later, you could barely think straight, by the time you were preparing your beautiful ikran for battle, as she was dutifully waiting on you to finish, trilling softly whenever you pet her in between chores. 
“Tam, tam, Oare.” 
You felt guilty at the way you’ve handled the past few days, as images of O’i’en swirled in your tired, progressively drowsier mind, at how it took you no time to do… everything you did with a man you hated, a man that more and more it seemed your ex was somewhat right about, despite how much you wanted to banish the thought into the pits of Hell, where it belonged. You started to regret the fact you have not taken the opportunity to sleep when the opportunity presented itself to you, and now you were about to go into one of the most dangerous missions of your life, one that may even infer the future of your clan, worn-out and distracted, body trembling under the weight of your mistakes. 
You spotted the man that affected you in ways no one else seemed capable to, face and body painted in war patterns, just like yours was, and winced a little when you realised he was already watching you, deep hatred imbued in his features - you knew there and then you were in for a world of pain, if you ever survived this mission to begin with. It actually hurt, thinking of all the ways he could still make your life a living nightmare, his ingenuity knowing little bounds and never diminishing throughout the years. 
“You ready, kid? I need my little star in tip-top shape today. We’re all counting on you, you know?” 
Jake’s voice, usually soothing and calming, was grating to your ears, although you had a sneaking suspicion it wasn’t the voice itself as much as what the voice uttered, words that you didn’t want to hear at all, words that pushed you near the brink of collapse, whose weight you always almost buckled under, but now, with everything else going on, brought you to your knees. Still, you nodded, the desire to please and make him proud of you outweighing anything else you wanted to say, like asking for permission to sit this one out, like how, right now, you felt more like a liability than an asset. You had to do this, and you would, because they needed you, because they relied on you. 
“That’s what I like to hear.” He tapped the little choker that was tied around your neck. “Make sure this is on, alright?” 
“Yes, sir.”
The war cries echoed through the Hallelujah mountain as the full might of the Omaticaya clan erupted through the floating rocks, bearing down on the helicopters and ships that were looking and scanning for signs of life, that were ready and armed to kill and torture, to destroy and burn life to the ground. On top of your ikran, bow tight in your hand, you normally felt unstoppable. You were unstoppable. Before you even had time to register it, 3 helicopters fell at Neytiri, Jake and Neteyam's hands, crashing into the mountains before exploding into nothingness, never to be seen again.
In the midst of all the chaos, you tried not to think about how hard it was to control Oare, how your own frenzied, disruptive consciousness was affecting her ability to fly and focus, how that in turn was making you miss shots you would have never missed otherwise, how that was further weakening your state, the whole endeavour a vicious cycle you saw no escape from.
"Mawey... mawey." you couldn't tell if you were talking to your ikran or to yourself, as you pet her gently, trying to return you both to a state in which you could be present and useful, the way you were expected to be.
The sudden pain that rushed over you was excruciating, worse than anything you’ve ever felt, worse than all your previous injuries put together, and with a trumping heart and fear poisoning your blood, that felt like it was spilling out of your body more with each passing second, you looked down at yourself, trying to assess the situation. There was nothing. The pain deepened as soon as realisation hit that the fatal wound and the ache that followed wasn’t yours, although it might as well have been. 
“No…” your beautiful ikran, that has been with you every day of your life since you were 12, that not only witnessed, but facilitated every one of your victories, that was integral part of your life and happiness, that made you feel seen and understood, let out a screech so loud and filled with anguish, one that would haunt you for the rest of your life, that settled in your bone marrow and will forever have a home there, until your last day on this planet.
As she drew her last breath, you felt every ounce of happiness dissipate from your being, along with any sense of self, any sense of purpose. You had no time to dwell on your immense loss, not as your queues broke apart with her departure from this plane, leaving you in a free fall that would make sure that while you lost your sister, you would be following her close behind. The last thing you saw before you felt darkness enveloping you was Neteyam, and your last thought was how you must have imagined his panicked look and the tortured howl that left his body, as his hand reached out for you, his own ikran diving towards your falling form at full speed. 
I sleep with one eye open and one eye closed 'Cause I'll hang myself if you give me rope I lost all my faith and lost all hope That everything means anything at all
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