#Idk much sexualities or expressions so if there are a lot I'm missing

[roturo]

COOL WITH YOU - gojo satoru x f!reader - + 4.5k words

summary: You never though throwing chocolate milk would lead you to being enemies with the popular guy at school, which led you into even a crazier situation.

warnings: smut; unprotected sex, cock warming, dacryphilia, pussy slapping, mating press, finger sucking, oral (f!receiving), marking, degradation kink, slut shaming, edging, teasing, sexual tension, overstimulation. Enemies into idk into lovers. UniversityAU, popular student!gojo satoru, fluff.

TUMBLR IS BASED ON A REBLOG SYSTEM. PLEASE REBLOG MY WORK.

It was a really nice day, really.

Nothing out of the extraordinary, normal classes, normal notes, everything was going great! Nice weather, and even your hair was having a good day!, but lunch time had to come.

You were walking through the cafeteria looking for the table you and your friends usually sit at. Walking with your tray through other people, you were about to make it, until you stumbled and say stumbled for crashed into an almost 2 meter man, food flying everywhere, and if that wasn't enough, your choco milk made a mess on his white t-shirt.

WHY DOESN'T HE WEAR THE COMPLETE UNIFORM?

You felt all the possible stares into you, couldn't even see with who you crashed, way too embarrassed for it. Mumbling a lot of 'sorry, i'm going to pay it for you' 'I can wash it for you, i'm so sorry.' 'I'll buy you a new one.'  You finally looked up and saw who it was.

Gojo Satoru. The popular guy in school. Might not be the smartest, but he has good grades. Not much of a troublemaker (he is), has dated at-least half of the girls in this school, and someway he still has a line of girls waiting for his turn.

He was next his best-friend. Suguru Geto, smartest guy in your class, he's more peaceful, just watches from a distance, a cute smirk,  hasn't dated half of the girls in school, but still has a long line of girls waiting for a chance.

Your face flushed with embarrassment as she saw that the dark liquid from your spilled bottle had stained his pristine white shirt. Gojo's expression was anything but pleased, and he snapped at you, "Watch where you're going dumbass!"

You tried to apologize, but Gojo had clearly made up his mind about you. From that day on, Gojo wouldn't miss any chance to humiliate you just like you did that day in the cafeteria.

He wouldn't let go of that day, calling you all types of nicknames related to it. ¨Milkie¨ ¨Choco-latte¨ and much more. Mostly throwing your books you had in your arms walking through the halls, always putting milk on your desk when recess was done.

He would often challenge you with difficult questions in class, and you would slowly find yourself doing the same. Days went over and you were now annoyed at his behavior. Who does he think he is? He couldn't treat people like he wanted to!

¨Can you stop?¨ Utahime stopped eating, dramatically putting the fork down. ¨Stop what?¨

¨Stop looking at fucking Gojo Satoru! It’s been like two months and you’re still annoyed at him.¨ 

Oh god. He's looking back at your table, Utahime said it loud enough so half of the cafeteria could hear. Feeling your face growing hot you looked back at your friend, her face showing how unbothered she is by the annoyed side-eyes you guys were receiving.

¨It's like you got obsessed with him or something! All you do is talk about him, how angry you are about him, how he did this, how he did that, do you like HIM or what?¨

¨Of course NO! I don't like Gojo-...¨

A small cough interrupted the small discussion you were having, looking up for the person who annoyingly stopped you trying to justify why you don't like the Gojo Satoru, was in fact, the Gojo Satoru.

He was standing in all glory in front of your table with his best friend, Geto, which seemed kinda unbothered with this whole ordeal.

You looked like a little kid being caught trying to grab another candy from the bowl after he got his daily one... which made Gojo chuckle.

How cute.

¨I'm sorry ladies for interrupting your chat, but me, and my friend Geto Suguru, wanted to invite you to our upcoming party this weekend. Right Suguru?¨ He nudged Geto, with his annoying smirk, at what Geto just nodded.

You were about to deny the offer, saying you’re not one of his easy girls to smash with, but Utahime was faster than you and said yes to the invitation and lent her phone so they could send her the place and time.

Oh, well, fuck.

Utahime greeted you into her house with her radiant smile, her eyes shining with mischief. "I would’ve killed you if you didn’t come!" she exclaimed, pulling you into her room. "Tonight, you’re going to have a great fuck and forget that annoying asshole!" You rolled your eyes because of her assumption of you liking Gojo. 

Utahime couldn't resist the thrill of the invitation, saying it’s ¨an event you have to live at least once at uni.¨ You spent hours preparing yourselves. Mostly, Utahime carefully choosing the perfect outfit and a dash of confidence to match. 

You and Utahime arrived at the party, the room buzzed with laughter, music, and vibrant conversations. You’ve been spending the whole night thinking of a way to take revenge on Gojo, and show Utahime proof you don’t like him. You have tried plenty of ways; winning at sports games, not a surprise he’s better than you, but it still pisses you off how irritating he is. You also tried beating him at exams, which somehow you did beat him on them, but somehow he gets more acknowledgment about having a 9 than you having a 10?

Does he fuck the teacher too?

Fuck.

Fuck…

Fuck!

That’s what you need! To fuck Gojo Satoru.

…

Not in that way…

Well, yes. But not him fucking you. You fucking him.

His whole ego is based on how every girl likes him, so… what if you do what he does to the other girls?

Geto greeted the both of you with a smile, offering you something to drink, which you denied, contrary to Utahime. You were having a small chat with your friend and a friend of hers, she was really nice, short haired, not that tall but not that short, she's a friend of Satoru & Suguru apparently… a pretty smile adorning her face while talking with Utahime, her name was Shoko.

And Shoko is really fun, really, but you couldn’t stop from distracting yourself, eyes following the tall frame, going from girl to girl all around the house. It infuriated you how they could be so clueless of the man they’re talking with.

You decided you needed to distract yourself and stop focusing on what he’s doing. Entering the kitchen was really calm, two people chatting while drinking. Preparing yourself a drink, you felt a small push in your shoulder, and it’s like destiny made you to never stop thinking about him, since somehow he was always there.

¨Oops, didn’t see you there.¨ His stupid face, with his stupid smirk.

¨Can’t stop disturbing me for one minute in your entire life?!¨

¨Me? Disturb you? You’re the one who won't stop looking at the other like some obsessed stalker!¨

¨Well, it’s not my fault you keep fooling those girls thinking if they let you fuck them they will be with you at least more than a week before you get bored!¨

He laughed at you, which only made you even angrier. ¨Are you jealous or what?¨

¨I’m not jealous- … don’t. Don’t you dare look at me that way.¨

¨What way?¨

¨Like you want to fuck me.¨

The tension in the room grew stronger, his stupid eyes were having pleasure watching you being angry at him being with other girls. You’re really pretty too, he never took the time to realize that. Maybe it's your fault because of the grembling face you put when you’re around him.

Thank god Suguru came into the room giving you a way out of this situation, calling for Satoru and you.

¨Hey, we need both of you to help us with something back there, Utahime and Shoko are there also. Utahime is really nice, but uhh… she might gotten a little too much drunk…¨

"Do we have to bring her?¨ Gojo said, pointing back at you with his thumb, not even looking at you, just at Geto. ¨You know I hate her." 

¨Yes Satoru, it’s her friend who we are talking about.¨

"I'm standing right here, you know..." 

"I know." You were about to hit Satoru if it wasn’t that Geto didn’t grab the both of you by the wrist and started walking away.

After leaving a very drunk Utahime in Geto’s room, Shoko staying with her, the two other boys (Most like Geto) invited you to go for some midnight ice-cream around the corner, at which, you had nothing to do, so you accepted the offer, who wouldn’t want ice-cream for free?

The three of you got your ice-cream, you were with Satoru while Suguru was paying for them.

¨Your ice cream looks delicious, let me try.¨

¨We have the exact same ice cream, for god’s sake!¨ Satoru was faster than you and gave a big bite (with no teeth) to your ice-cream, you grumbled at his stubbornness.

¨Hey, no fair! You have more sprinkles than mine!¨ You looked up at his face, finding ice-cream all around his lips. Unconsciously your hand caressed his cheek and with your thumb, you wiped the ice-cream off his mouth. Your finger resting on his lower lip, he slightly opened his mouth giving enough space for your thumb to enter, which it did. His tongue swirled around it, savoring the ice-cream he stole from you. Your eyes never left his and vice versa. His cheeks were slightly pink, his eyes were now a darker shade of blue thanks to his dilated pupils.

His hands found a way to lock between your waist, making you get closer to him. Your thumb left his mouth and slowly got into his chest. He smiled at you. A genuine smile from him. Not an evil trace on it. His eyes squinted a little, which made you also smile. 

¨Can y’all believe the old man wanted me to pay for an extra ice-cream we didn’t buy? I stayed like 10 min more trying to explain him we only bought 3.¨

Your face turned pale, as fast as you could, you pushed yourself out of Gojo’s embrace, he awkwardly coughed fixing his hair.

¨Are you guys okay?¨ Suguru looked confused but then looked at you and your melted ice-cream.

¨Oh shit. It melted. Your eyes locked with Satoru for a moment and moved on to the melted ice-cream. Did that really happen?

A week passed and Gojo couldn’t get you off his mind. The moment replaying every day, the feeling of your hand on his cheek never leaving. He was going crazy. 

Ever since Utahime and Shoko got closer, that meant hanging out as a group. It somehow got better? Gojo stopped with the bitterness and the hate towards you, it turned more into teasing?, it’s like he’s been feeling cool with you?

 It even turned into the both of you teasing each-other light heartly, it was fun.

During a late-night study session at Shoko’s,  you and Gojo got into argument from some science topic, you could sense the others were annoyed at the unnecessary pause of studying, leading them into grabbing their phones to go through social media, going for water, or even just start making small drabbles of drawings, knowing they couldn’t do anything about the both of you arguing because of your stubbornness.

Until Utahime snapped, ¨Oh my god, can the both of you just fuck so the tension could leave?!¨ that left the both of you speechless and blankly looking at eachother, red invaded eachother’s face because of how things turned out and how others point of view of the type of relationship the two of you have.

...

... Your walk home was… awkward but nice?

¨Listen. It’s nearing midnight and you're a female walking the streets alone, at least let me walk you home? As much as you annoy me I’d rather you not get murdered¨ You take in his words slowly nodding in agreement as you cross your arms, ¨fine.. nice to hear that you don’t want me dead.¨

So that’s how the both of you ended walking together to your house. It was a weird bonding experience you didn’t think you needed.

¨Wow you can actually be a sweetheart this time, what happened to the boy who was arguing with me today is pluto is still considered a planet?¨

You say lightheartedly but turn to glare in his direction anyway, watching as he rubs the back of his neck with a chuckle.

¨Yeah that was pretty immature. to be fair we’re just as bad as each other ̈

You nodded in agreement it really is a game of back and forth trying to outdo each other. You felt a sudden wetness on your face sticking your hand out and watching as your palms filled with water capturing the rain droplets within, the rain poured without any mercy but thankfully you could see your house just a little down the street, with the nice moment you were having with Gojo you bravely grabbed his hand with a giggle making a bolt towards your house, to your surprise Gojo tightened his grip running beside you as the rain soaked you both.

Catching your breaths as you stood on your porch, sheltering yourselves from the rain, breathlessly laughing as you straightened yourself looking up at Gojo who was just as drenched.

¨Who saw that coming?¨ He smiles pulling lightly on your hand that still stayed secured in his, you were only inches away from each other but the cool breeze and crackling of the thunder held a mysterious mood that drew you into him.

In what should have been forbidden your lips touched, tasting the water that ran along your face seeping into your mouth as you reconnected with Gojo’s pretty lips, it didn’t last long as a large gust of wind interrupted causing you to shiver and unintentionally find comfort in Gojo, pressing against his chest. You could feel his hand rubbing gently against your upper back as he stared down calmly, you finally pulled away from him jiggling with your front door and popping it open with just a twist of your key, frowning your eyebrows slightly as you turn to look at the soaking wet boy again watching him turn towards the rain and stepping closer as if he was about to make a run for it.

¨You don’t have to leave.. it looks pretty hectic out there, i can dry your clothes and you can leave when it’s safer, if that’s what you want?¨ Gojo seemed conflicted a hint of hesitation could be seen but his expression was mostly unreadable, he took one last look out towards the street before turning on his heels, walking into your house with a smile, ¨That seems like a better idea.. thanks.¨

You really didn’t know what you were thinking letting Gojo into your house but it felt right, ¨Your... hoodie¨, you say holding your hand out towards him.¨I can put it in the dryer¨ Gojo paused for a moment looking down, his lips shaping into a straight line as his cheeks puffed out. ¨I’m not wearing an undershirt¨ You let out a light oh before making your way into the laundry room, ¨here! You can throw a towel over yourself if you feel uncomfortable!¨ You yell out to him, turning around to be greeted with Gojo’s bare chest, ¨It’s fine I don’t need a towel¨ He plainly says handing you his hoodie, you quickly nod taking it and heading over to the dryer.

¨What about my pants?¨ You hear him say as you open the lid. ¨What about them?¨ You question turning around to see his slightly wet jeans, ¨They’re not that wet but I can do them too.. got that towel?¨, Gojo let’s out a chuckle unzipping his jeans.

¨I’m not going to be naked, I do have underwear on after all, do you want me to wear a towel?¨ You went silent slowly extending your arm and making a gimme motion with your hand, ¨I don’t care it’s your decision¨, you say sounding a bit flustered, looking away nervously Gojo stripped himself of his jeans leaving him in his underwear. You throw his clothes into the dryer freezing suddenly before closing the lid, realising your own saturated clothes as you played with the hem of your shirt, “fuck it”, you whispered ripping your top from over your head, your pants following in hot pursuit letting them join in with Gojo’s clothes.

The dryer light blinked on watching as the session started not daring to turn around as you knew Gojo was still very much present, feeling a sense of embarrassment as you stood away from him semi nude, the only thing you didn’t know is that he was much closer than you thought feeling his hand smooth over your arm a slight tingling sensation could be felt as he pressed up against your bare back, ¨Aren’t you cold?¨, he said sliding his mouth near your ear, you slowly nodded feeling your words getting stuck in your throat, ¨I mean no, not really¨ You crackled out quickly correcting yourself, your whole body was heating up as the butterflies in your stomach did multiple backflips, ¨Well I am baby¨, you let out a rigid breath feeling your pussy contract within itself at the sudden nickname, you had no idea he could make you feel this way, ¨How are you gonna get warm?¨ You softly breathe out goosebumps arising from your skin as Gojo rubbed up and down your sides placing a few kisses against your neck, ¨I have an idea if you’d spread your legs a little?¨ You obeyed his words like a dog, running on your own horny adrenaline.

¨Are you okay with this?¨ You nodded, feelin his fingers come in contact with your pussy pushing your panties to the side as he swiped his pointer finger through your folds, he stopped clutching his hands roughly on your hips, his forehead laying on your shoulder blade.

¨How? You’re so wet, I barely even touches you.¨ Gojo said sensually pulling your hips towards him as he rubbed his hard against your ass, ¨I thought I’d have to do a little more but I think this is enough.. ready?¨

He kissed up your back adjusting himself a bit, ¨Ready?... for what?-¨, You struggled to say the last syllables as Gojo pushed the tip of his cock into you wrapping an arm around your waist and the other holding onto the dryer in front of you, pulling you upwards so he can angle your entrance just right so he can fully fit into you comfortably.

A gasp escaped you quickly holding onto the side of his thigh as he stayed still, the feeling of his long cock deep inside you made you wriggle pulling your heat away from him as he replants himself, the heat off Gojo’s chest and stomach burned into your back, ¨Now that’s warm¨, Gojo spoke, ¨And it’s tight too¨, He slightly giggled out resting his head on your shoulder.

¨Is it uncomfortable?¨ He quietly spoke in concernment Gojo’s worries fading as he finally feels you melting into him, ¨No it’s good¨ You say sheepishly feeling the slight shake of his arm as he continued to hold onto the dryer, another kiss being littered against your upper back upon hearing you.

It’s beyond weird getting this intimate with him but there always was some lingering sexual tension though. Nothing is really happening as you both stood in silence while Gojo kissed your body, leaving hickeys everywhere. Your body temperatures rising quickly but soon you started to feel Gojo’s movements, he awkwardly pumped himself into you stopping and starting his motions as he fought his urges, ¨Satoru?... If you’re going to fuck me just do it, this is nice and all but I know what we both want¨

You say trying to look at the boy who was still resting his head on your shoulder, you saw him perk up displaying a gummy like smile, ¨If that’s what you want who am I to deny you?¨

He jolted you forward banging you flat against the dryer giving you a sharp thrust as he grabbed a hold of your hair, bringing you back so he could kiss you, ¨You really want your enemy fucking you? Want everyone to know how of a cockslut you are? That Utahime was right? filthy.¨ 

You hum in pleasurable agreement a cheeky giggle escaping you as Gojo tilts your head to the side giving himself access to your neck, ¨Enemy? Do you really want to be calling yourself that when you started this? I think you’ve always wanted to do this, you love me¨ You say daringly, feeling incredibly unsatisfied as he pulled himself out of you spinning you around and finally coming face-to-face with him, Gojo’s hair now completely dry but nothing changed about his smirk.

¨You don’t need this” He unclips your bra way too easily wiggling it in front of your face like a trophy

“Don’t try putting this act on me, you’ve wanted my dick ever since you met me, those looks you don't give them to everyone.. probably why you love me so much ̈ You push him away playfully, covering your breasts and snatching your bra from him attempting to walk passed, Gojo re-attaches himself to you pulling you into a back hug as he kisses you roughly, biting your lower lip dragging slightly out making you whine.

“Don’t be stubborn, the laundry room is nice but why don’t you show me the bedroom?” You lean into him with a satisfied smile spreading across your face as you had every intention in bringing him to your bed, ¨Where do you think I’m taking you?¨

Nothing was stopping you, both fully naked in bed as Gojo’s face found refuge in between your legs licking up and down your slit and sucking on your sensitive clit, making infinity signs between them, holding your thighs apart to stop you from caging him in with each spasm of your body, “I’m gonna-“, you moaned out Gojo humming at your words removing his mouth from your heat and licking his two fingers as he dives them straight into your soaking pussy pumping in and out, “You’re gonna what?” He smirks, making a gesture of using his free hand to put on his ear to sign like he didn’t listen to you. Watching as you gasp at the sudden intrusion his smirk grew larger. ¨Oh! There! Satoru please I-¨

He stopped, smiling proudly and taking in your watery eyes, his smile soon turning into a sarcastic pout, ¨Aw, that’s cute¨ He laughed, pushing you flat against the bed as you leaned up to try and hit him, him being faster slapping your pussy.

¨Oh stop it! you’ll get what you want later slut, look what you’ve done to me¨ He looks down at his hard and angry cock begging for attention, rolling his fingers around his shaft as he covers his member in your juices.

¨Open your legs wider” Gojo hovers above you angling himself at your cunt, finally slipping back into your wet cunt, wasting no time in hammering into you giving you no chance in preparing for his speed, quickly wrapping your arms around his neck as he mercilessly rocks you back and forth but as Gojo lifted each of your legs up putting you into a mating press, which made the thrusters even go deeper inside you, turning you into a beautiful moaning mess.¨Ah! Look at you, you’re beautiful¨

Gojo groans out closing his eyes and throwing his head back in an attempt not to bust, picking up the pace as he fucks you raw diving his face into your neck as he concentrates feeling his heavy panting on your neck.

¨Don’t stop this time¨ You barely get out feeling your body getting to it’s highest point again, your back arching immediately as Gojo’s fingers had sneakily approached your clit rubbing your clit at lightning speed. You couldn’t breathe your legs spasming out and clenching around Gojo so hard he could barely move, your moans turning into a pleasurable scream as you reached your orgasm falling limp as you continued to pulsate around Gojo’s cock. 

He isn’t done yet. Taking in sharp breaths as he chases after his own high, you whine slightly from sensitivity but you weren’t going to stop him, thrusting a few more times till he pulls out in quickly, pumping himself in his hand as he aims his load on your stomach, moaning sweetly as he shoots his cum all over your lower half swiping his thumb over his head picking up some of the white substance and shoving it into your slightly agape mouth, ¨How does it taste sweetheart?¨ You start sucking his thumb without any hesitation making a loud popping sound as you pull his hand away.¨Delicious¨, you smile. 

With a satisfied chuckle Gojo collapsed onto your bed watching as he reached for anything to help clean yourself up with, ¨I don’t regret doing that you know…¨ He quickly says as he wiped up his mess, ¨I would’ve preferred if you cum somewhere a little less messy¨ You raised an eyebrow, ¨I meant having sex with you.. I’d do it again¨ You smiled, feeling the excitement run through you with just the thought of having sex with Gojo again ¨I’d like that too¨ He went a little quiet intensely watching you, getting closer to you, his lips crashed yours. This time it wasn’t rushed at all, he was moving his lips slowly, capturing every moment of it. Taking a small moment to breathe, he started kissing you again, then giving small pecks all around your face which made you giggle. He finally stopped with getting himself around your arms, cuddling you. 

He called out your name at which you just answered with a small sound out of tiredness. 

¨I think I love you.¨

#gojo satoru smut #gojo satoru x reader #satoru gojo #gojo satoru #jjk x reader #jjk smut #jjk #jujutsu gojo #jujutsu kaisen smut #jujutus kaisen #smut #gojo satoru x reader smut #gojo satoru x you #pls dont let this flop

[chaotic-on-main]

Your sparring post w/ levi finished me off 😭 would u ever consider doing similar stuff for Miche? I love the idea of sparring with him n havin to deploy some seductive techniques to distract him except u actually really like him n it works

Sparring 2.0 | CanonAU Drabble

☾ Pairings ➼ Miche Zacharius x gn!Reader

☾ Content/Warnings ➼ fighting, sexual tension, established-ish relationship?, suggestive themes?

☾ A/N ➼ HI! Okay sorry this took so long, I've had the worst bout of reverse imposter syndrome?? Idk if that's even a thing, I just know it was very disorienting to bring up Levi and NOT write about him haha. But I really enjoyed this as a writing exercise, it really brought me out of my comfort zone. The worst thing about how little time we got with Miche is how we don't have a lot to go on with his character. So with that said, this is kind of how I see him and I hope that's okay!!

☾ Word Count ➼ ~1.1k

The mid-afternoon sun bares down on your already sun-kissed face while you watch your boyfriend get his ass kicked by Captain Levi from the fence separating the barracks and training grounds. Miche Zacharius towered over Levi by a good foot and then some, so you couldn't help but laugh out loud when Levi slams Miche into the ground with an arm pinned behind him.

"Are they at it again?" Nanaba leans against the fence next to you, staring into the pit with an amused smile.

"Yeah. Ever since Levi took his place as 'Humanity's Strongest Soldier'," you use air quotes as you speak, shooting Nanaba a matching smile. "Miche has been trying to prove something."

"Prove what? That he’s shit at fighting?" Her comment makes you snort.

“Oh I'm so telling him you said that." You jokingly chide, bumping into her shoulder affectionately.

"Telling who what?” Miche's sudden voice startles you but you're quick to hide your surprise with a teasing smile. He stands in front of you with only the fence separating you two. With his height compared to you, he makes the perfect sun-shield.

"Nothing. Are you two done?" You look around him to see an empty pit, no captain in sight.

"Levi said he needed to make sure his squad cleaned the stables correctly." Miche says as he pulls up the bottom of his shirt to dab at the sweat that drips down his face. You can't keep your gaze from sliding down his toned abs and blonde happy trail as he does so. "Nanaba, did you get those reports on my desk yet?” He drops his shirt much to your dismay.

"On my way to do that now, Sir." She smirks as she gives a half-assed salute then turns and leaves. When she's gone, you look back up to Miche with a cheeky grin.

"How do you get your squad to listen to you right away?” You arch an eyebrow at him.

“They know I’ll kick their ass if they don’t.” His response makes you chuckle.

“Nanaba didn’t seem too terrified of you.” He gives you a lopsided grin before sliding his fingers down your face then under your chin, tilting it up to face him better with your chin now trapped between his thumb and forefinger. He leans down as if to kiss you but stops abruptly, his face hovering right above yours.

"Hmm. Are you?" He traces your bottom lip with his thumb as he eyes your most likely dazed face. His expression is hard to read.

"Should I be?" You swallow hard. He only hums and leans in more.

Miche was never this forward, and by the time you realize his true purpose, it was too late. He grabs you by the waist and wrist then flips you over him into the pit. You've always been known for your agility so you were able to land without issue. The issue was the fact that your 6'4" boyfriend came barreling down at you the second you did.

"Miche, what the-" You barely duck out of the way in time. A rush of wind hits your face from a missed punch. It wasn't as fast as you'd expect from him, which you were grateful for. You jump back to give yourself some space but he fills it just as quickly, putting himself in an offensive stance. You only have time to cross your arms in front of your chest before his knee makes contact. A dull pain makes its way up your arms.

Throwing your whole weight back, you backflip out of the way and feel your feet kick something. Good. If you could just get a little more distance… but it seems like Miche knows your fighting style inside and out because he doesn’t give you a chance to think. He throws up another punch in which you counter it with your forearm, using this moment to pull your knee up into his groin.

As always, he expects it and moves a leg back to avoid your strike. With one swift motion, he grabs your thigh and pulls up which knocks you off balance and you hit the ground with a slam. You’re gasping for air when he pulls himself on top of you and pins your wrists above your head with his knees on both sides of your right leg.

“Ready to give up, yet?” He grumbles down at you.

“H-” You attempt to move an arm and notice there’s quite a bit of give. “Hardly. Why are you going so easy on me?” You quip back, a smirk tugging at your lips. His body shakes above you as he laughs.

“That’s not what you said last nig-” You lean forward to close the distance and lock your lips onto his, cutting him off mid-sentence. He’s so taken aback by the sudden movement, but you feel him relax which is exactly what you were hoping for.

As quickly as possible, you pull your arms out of his grips. This causes an imbalance in his stance, which you were happy to take advantage of. You wrap your legs around him and twist to the side at the same time that you use your hands to push him. He falls without resistance. When you both land, he’s now flat on his back with you straddling his chest with your full weight. You pin his arms to the side and smile down at him innocently.

“Are you sure you’re humanity’s second strongest? We might have to move you down the list.” You chuckle down at him.

“To my defense, I just sparred with Levi.” He grumbles back.

“And yet you still picked a fight… and lost.”

“Okay, okay. Yes, you win. This time.” You lean down to kiss him again, this time with no ulterior motive. After a moment, you break away and sigh. Looking down, you see dirt and dust caking your once pristine civilian clothes.

“Now I need to go clean up. I was headed into town before you decided to beat me up.” With that, you gently pull yourself off Miche and offer a hand for him to help himself up with. He just wipes at the dust on his uniform with his hands, grunting back in response. Turning to leave, you yell over your shoulder as you walk away, “You could help with that, if you want.” A quick pair of footsteps falling in behind you makes you laugh as you lead the way back to the barracks.

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#asks #answered #anon #miche zacharius #miche zacharius x reader #miche x reader #mike x reader #mike zacharias #mike zacharias x reader #fluff #established relationship #attack on titan #aot #shingeki no kyojin #snk

[horizon-verizon]

I’m halfway through the reading of “English Queens and the Body Politic”, a study examining an often overlooked representation of monarchy in the personae of powerful queens, and at one point the author María Cristina Quintero says:

“From the Spanish perspective, Elizabeth I was the historical embodiment of all the evils endemic to female power–a heretical woman who had escaped all manner of repression, social control, and enclosure.”

That’s EXACTLY WHY Alicent, Cole and their insanely misogynistic stans hates Rhaenyra, and that she dared to had three children obviously out of wedlock.

It's so funny, considering the Spanish had a female ruler in Isabella of Castile (I'm sure it's because she had a husband and co ruler in Ferdinand of Aragon).

I also don't think Elizabeth escaped "all manner of oppression, social control, and enclosure". Firstly because she knew there'd be a lot of trouble if she ever did pick a consort and have children, so her fear of having kids was developed and compounded by such AND she missed put on potential marriages and children she might have decided she wanted if it didn't come at such high cost. Two, it appears she had to train herself in various ways to not be taken advantage of by various lords and ladies and even by her own father. I saw one creator say she basically had to control her expressions to throw people off as "late" as her early preteens. Three, she lost her mother to her father's drive to get a male heir, in such a way to show her that women are valued much less than boys which is a trauma that most women share and have experienced at some point in their early childhood in various patriarchal societies. And she still was under a lot of pressure to conform to this new "Virginia" model of queenliness AND faced pressure for things like the Mary Stuart situation. When she was much younger in her teens, she faced her father's last wife's new husband's possible sexual assault/grooming at worst, his uncomfortable attempts to manipulate her at worst.

BUT bc she was pretty adaptable, observant, intelligent, and seemingly passionate with a will of her own she did go out o enforce over others now and again, yeah. Alicent would HATE her. Not to praise the colonizer/colonization enabler, but...idk these were the facts of her life, even as a royal, royal bastard, to a royal again.

#asoiaf asks to me #the greens' characterizations #the greens #elizabeth i #fiction vs reality #european history #english history #your english is good

[streamsofstardust]

lovers 101 | j.t.k

jake kiszka x reader

word count: 8,071 (told y'all this was a big one)

content warnings: masturbating (m&f), drinking, choking, fingering, teasing/edging (up to interpretation), penetrative sex, lots of dirty talk, gross history stuff because education is important but brutal, more lingerie bc it's still hot, jake is literally feral idk what to tell you [let me know if i missed anything!]

summary: both you and jake are sick of the game. so what do you do with all the built up sexual tension?

a/n: oop I'm back. very sorry for the long wait. a bunch of people reached out asking where chapter three was and i promise i didn't forget about it. i've spent the last month adjusting to a new job and a new schedule but i promise i won't wait that long for the next chapter, especially now that it's really picking up. anyway, enjoy!

chapter 3- his favorite secret

When you met up with Lily at the car, you were visibly flustered. Lily smirked and opened her mouth, presumably to ask what went down between you and Professor Kiszka - Jake - after she left. You put a hand up to stop her before she could utter a single word, causing her to chuckle.

You were more or less dead silent the entire drive back home, save for a few nods and brief words of acknowledgement to your best friend, who was effortlessly filling the air with random stories. It was one hell of an effort to focus on what she said, though. Every thought in your brain was occupied by Jake. His hands on your body, his chest pressed against your own. His breath in your ear. How it was so easy for him to pull those little sounds out of you. He had you, hook line and sinker, and if you had your wits about you, you might have had the sense to feel slightly embarrassed by it all. But, alas, you didn’t. 

The moment you entered your apartment you grabbed the bottle of bourbon your parents had gifted you a while back, taking a few long swigs and not bothering to properly pour a glass. Lily laughed loudly at your behavior.

“Was it that bad?” You shook your head in response, waiting for the lingering burn to subside before giving a verbal answer.

“Not bad, Lil. He’s just… god. He’s the fucking devil.”

“And you want to fuck him.” You hung your head. “I really do.”

“You want to fuck the devil.”

You sighed dramatically. “I want to fuck the devil.”

Lily grabbed two bottles of water from the fridge, handing you one and moving the bourbon back to its place on the bar cart. She looked at you with raised brows and an expression that read so, what happened? You took a deep breath and filled her in.

– –

Back on campus, Jake was sitting in his office, the assignments he had been grading long forgotten in a pile on the floor. After your encounter post-lecture, Jake had nearly sprinted to the bathroom to splash cold water on his face. He was achingly hard, but he knew he couldn’t do a damn thing about it while he was still at work. He had half a mind to cancel his next two classes so he could go home early and grant himself a much needed release.

So that’s exactly what he did. 

His right hand grabbed the gearshift the entire drive back to his house, his knuckles completely white. He couldn’t recall the last time a woman had had this much of an influence on his body, his mind. You were consuming him and he couldn’t ignore the primal urges telling him to make you his in every way. He was determined to have a taste of you, and soon. Besides, he had no doubt that you wanted the same thing. 

– – 

After telling Lily your brief story, you waited with bated breath for her reaction; she had been uncharacteristically quiet. She was sitting across from you on your bed, resting her chin on her palms as her fingers softly tapped on her face.

“So he cornered you.”

“I mean, we were leaning on his desk, I wouldn’t say he-”

“And you put his thumb in your mouth??”

“Yeah, that was, um… impulsive.”

“And he choked you?!?!” The shock at that question didn’t shock you, it was kind of valid.

You flushed at the reminder, though, swearing you could still feel Jake’s hand on your throat. You smirked and shuddered, quickly imagining those warm, sturdy hands elsewhere. You were snapped out of your fantasy - quite literally - by the sound of Lily’s fingers clicking in front of your face. Smiling sheepishly, you muttered quietly, “Sorry, got a bit lost in my head for a moment.” Lily scoffed playfully.

– –

As a thank you for taking care of her last weekend, Lily offered to make dinner for the two of you. And, rather than order take out and put the food on your dinner plates - which she often counted as her “making dinner” - she actually cooked a meal. You appreciated it, of course, and decided to jump into the shower while she prepared the food. Unfortunately for you, the down time gave you ample opportunity to think about what had happened earlier in the day between you and Jake.

You wondered if he had been holding himself back in that moment. If, had you given the okay, he would have gone even further. You were granted a glimpse into who Jake was outside of the lecture hall, when he was a man other than the brilliant and sophisticated Professor Kiszka. You were given a sneak peak at who he became behind closed doors, and now you couldn’t stop yourself from letting your imagination go wild. 

You adjusted the water temperature to a perfect heat, one that instantly relaxed the muscles you didn’t notice had been horribly tense. You washed your hair, taking in the scent of vanilla and rose, before washing off your body, and, subsequently, Jake’s touch. The very thought of that made you frown. How long would it be before you felt the warmth of his body on yours? How long would you have to wait before you could kiss him? His soft, plump lips took center stage in your mind. You began thinking about how they’d feel on your own, how they’d feel training along your throat, leaving small purple bruises in their wake. You thought about those very lips moving along every inch of your skin, marking parts of you that were kept hidden to the rest of the world.

Subconsciously, you began sliding your hands down your body, lower and lower until you graced the skin of your upper thighs. You gently massaged the skin, taking the time to work yourself up before getting to what you really wanted. Lily was cooking, after all, so you had plenty of time. One of your hands moved up to massage one of your breasts, a soft sigh escaping your lips at the feeling. Once more you found yourself imagining your hands were replaced by Jake’s.

Jake.

His name fit him so perfectly. It excluded power, yet spoke to how… regular, he really was. It was sexy, knowing him on a first name basis. You weren’t just another student anymore. Now there was a budding rapport, one that you hoped would result in you finding your way into his bed. Or hell, bent over the desk in his private office. The thought of that instantly brought your attention to your previously forgotten task. 

You no longer cared to move slowly, choosing instead to make use of the intense pressure pouring out of your shower head. One day you’d thank Lily for replacing the one that was originally there with a detachable version.

Switching the setting to a higher, more direct jet, you immediately placed the head over your core. The pressure paired with the heat of the waster was incredible, and you sank deep into the pleasure. Yeah, you’d definitely be thanking Lily.

You shut your eyes and rested your head against the cold tile, enjoying every minute of your self satisfaction. You could feel your release coming on strong, and god was it needed. You had left Jake’s classroom shortly after his rather bold statement, not opening any doors for something more to happen. So yeah, you needed some relaxation in the form of what you hoped would be a very satisfactory orgasm.

The build up was intense, your legs already struggling to keep you standing. But, as if the gods had decided to play a cruel joke on you, loud knocking on the bathroom door pulled you from that glorious ledge.

“You’ve been in there forever! Stop using up all the hot water and get your ass out here. I just slaved over this meal and if you let it get cold I’m making you walk to class.” God damn it Lily.

Just as quickly as your orgasm had bloomed, it dissipated, taking your content mood with it. You were close, so achingly close that not falling over that edge was almost painful.

Maybe you wouldn’t be thanking Lily after all.

– – 

Just twenty minutes away at his own house, Jake was in a situation almost identical to yours, save for the roommate with terrible timing.

As Jake stepped into the shower, his thoughts were racing, every single one of them focused on you. He hadn’t been able to get you off his mind all week, and the day you dressed up to resemble him? Well, he was impressed with his ability to not fuck you in front of the entire class. Every part of him was screaming to make you his.

There was no question that he thought you were gorgeous. But your beauty wasn’t the only part of you he was enchanted by. He liked your wit, how you challenged him with that sassy, seductive attitude. Even when he caught you off guard, you managed to stay at his level, even one upping him from time to time. He couldn’t remember the last time a woman had made him so flustered. He enjoyed the back and forth, the game of cat and mouse, immensely.

And above everything else, he adored how determined you were to get what you wanted. He especially liked that that was him.

He thought about what you might have done after you two parted ways. Did you run to your friend and squeal like a schoolgirl? He huffed a laugh at that. No, he certainly didn’t see you doing that.

Did you think about his words? How his hands felt on your skin? How close he was to you? Did you think about his hand wrapped around your throat? He was dying to know.

Jake hadn’t stopped thinking about any of that. You were so god damn close, the scent emanating off of you - vanilla and rose - so undeniably you, and he loved it. He thought about how he could feel your pulse racing, your heart begging to leap out of your chest.

He thought about how he believed he really had you in that moment. But, ever the feisty little thing, you couldn’t let him have the win. When you sucked his thumb into your mouth his knees almost buckled. The way your tongue felt on his skin sent him reeling. And the way you looked up at him with those big innocent eyes… No, he knew those were bullshit. You were far from innocent. An absolute fucking minx.

He wanted to feel your lips on his. He nearly kissed you in that room, and he was sure you expected him to do just that. He couldn’t make it that easy for you, though. He wanted to see you on your knees, hear you beg. Telling him how badly you craved him. His touch, his kiss, his cock. Fuck, he desperately needed to hear that.

He found himself reaching for his cock, hard and leaking already. He leaned his head down, dribbling his own spit onto himself before beginning to stroke his dick at a slow pace. He did his best to imagine your hands wrapped around him, but the callouses that covered his hands from years of playing guitar made that horribly difficult.

It was almost embarrassing for Jake. The way he was getting so close so quickly. He wanted to feel your lips around him, to watch tears pool in your eyes and run down your face as he fucked your throat.

Fuck. He needed you more than anything.

The thought of him slipping into your soaking wet cunt was what sent him speeding towards the edge. The whimpers and breathy moans that you’d release at the feeling of him stretching you out. Sounds that would turn into full blown screams of his name as he fucked you senseless. All Jake wanted was to watch you fall apart under him over and over and over until you could barely move, too fucked out to think about anything other than him.

The nail in the coffin for him was thinking about spilling him cum inside of you, only pulling out enough to watch it start to pour out before fucking it back into you.

With just a few more strokes, Jake released a loud groan and found his release, placing his palm against the cold time to steady himself.

In his post orgasm haze, Jake made a decision. No more games. No more subtly fucking with each other. He needed you, and soon.

– –

By the time your next class with Jake came along, you were ansty. Obviously you two were on the same page, there was no doubt about that. The question was, what would his next move be? You wanted him to have control over the situation, settling for lingering glances, sexy outfits, and trying to distract him during his lectures. You had fun with it, if you were honest, but after seeing the lust in his eyes, you crave more.

You were trying to listen to the story Lily was telling you about a guy in her english literature class that she insisted she was going to marry. The sound of a paper being put on your desk immediately grabbed your attention and you could smell Jake’s cologne as he walked past your desk. You picked up the paper - your last written exam - and went to put it away without a second thought. As you moved to do so, you noticed a large C- at the top in red ink, and your eyes nearly fell out of your head. 

C-??? You could have sworn you nailed that exam. Your attention then shifted to the note written directly under the grade:

See me after class.

~ Jake

Well, at least you’d have an excuse to spend some time with him.

At the end of class, you told Lily to head out without you. You both had about an hour to spare before your next class, so with a wag of her eyebrows and a rather suggestive gesture from her hands, she left the room. You waited for everyone to leave before addressing him.

“Um, you wanted to see me?” You asked, trying to conceal your nervous state.

Jake put down his pen and lifted his head to face you. “Yeah, I did. What happened there?” He pointed at the paper in your hand before crossing his arms in front of his chest. “I could’ve sworn I stressed the importance of taking detailed notes in my class.” 

Oh. He really did only want to discuss your grade.

“You did, and I do! I honestly thought I did really well on it. Kinda shocked at the grade I got.” You dropped your head in shame and couldn’t help but feel embarrassed. Stupid college girl was so distracted trying to seduce her professor that she screwed herself academically. Good job.

“You need to review more, then. I know it’s a lot of material and it can be a bit daunting, but you’re smart. You can do better than this.” His voice was soft, but you still couldn’t stop yourself from feeling like he was scolding you. You didn’t like that he sounded disappointed in you.

“Is there extra credit or something else I can do?” You asked, trying to be hopeful. “Or can I retake the exam?” A C- on your belt made you angry; you couldn’t leave it like that and move on.

You still hadn’t been able to look him in the eyes, knowing you couldn’t handle it if he looked as disappointed as you imagined. But then, you had no choice. 

“I don’t really do extra credit.” You felt the warmth of his hand on your skin as his forefinger lifted your head up by your chin, forcing you to look at him. Those brown eyes would be the death of you. “But I can help you study after class if you’d like.”

You looked at him in shock. “You’d really do that?” Yeah, you definitely sounded a bit too excited at his offer, something that certainly didn’t go unnoticed by Jake. He flashed that gorgeous smile and chuckled, nodding his head before responding.

“Yes, I’d be happy to.”

The soft side of Jake was new to you and you really liked it. You couldn’t ignore the swarm of butterflies making a home in your stomach.

“Meet me in my office tonight around 6. My last class gets out around 5:50, so I’ll meet you there. Okay?”

You smiled brightly and nodded. “That’s perfect. Thank you so much.”

You turned to leave, but were stopped by a hand wrapping around your wrist, one that pulled you back into his chest. Your breath caught in your throat, your pulse racing. You had placed a hand against his chest to stop yourself from slamming into him. He was so fucking warm, all you wanted to do was move your hand along his body, feeling the taught muscles of his torso and his arms. You were losing focus quickly, feeling yourself getting worked up simply by the close proximity and minimal physical contact.

“You better show up and be on time.” He paused, moving your hair away from your ear and leaning in to speak directly into it, his hot breath causing you to shiver. You felt the hand on your wrist move up your arm, his grip still just as firm. His other hand found its place on your hip, and he spoke again, this time much closer than he had before.

“I’d hate to have to punish you, sweetheart.”

– –

The second you were able to, you rushed home to get ready before your meeting with Jake. You recurled some of the strands of hair that had loosened throughout the day, applied a bit more makeup, and changed into a completely different outfit. It was rather cold in the morning, so you had originally gone with a pair of dark wash jeans, a baggy sweater, and booties, but of course, that wasn’t good enough for your one on one with Jake.

You decided to change into a short, plaid wool skirt, sheer black tights, a plain black bodysuit, and thigh high boots. If he looked at you with suspicion, you’d do your best to pass it off as you needing to look good to grab drinks with Lily once you left. Obviously you knew the truth, though, and while you certainly believed Jake intended on helping you study, you were determined to get a little something extra.

As you made your way back to campus, you felt your hands getting clammy. You probably had no reason to be as nervous as you were, but you really couldn’t help it. Not to mention you were still on edge about the reason for this meeting: your shitty and very much unexpected exam grade.

Checking your watch for the time, you saw you made it to Jake’s office with eight minutes to spare. You waited outside his door after seeing he still wasn’t back from his last class. Not a problem, you were in no rush. A few minutes later he appeared, looking as incredible as he did earlier in the day. It amazed you that his good looks were so effortless.

Picking his head up from his phone, he saw you standing outside his office, and a crooked smile developed on his face. “Early for our meeting? Good girl.” The last two words rasped out of his mouth while he was just barely a foot away from you and you could’ve sworn he said them to get a rise out of you. Heat flooded your body and pooled in your core at the simple praise. You supposed he did, in fact, get a reaction, but not one that he could blatantly observe. 

Unfortunately for you, Jake was great at reading body language, and given that the two of you had spent so much time trying to get the tiniest reaction out of the other, he’d gotten rather familiar with some of your tells. So you didn’t need to be super obvious about his praise turning you on, you didn’t need to tell him at all. He could see it in the way your eyes widened, the way your cheeks flushed, and the way a hushed gasp left your lips. It was almost too easy for him.

He led you into his office, gesturing for you to take a seat in front of his desk. You didn’t miss the way his eyes roamed over your body, taking in your appearance and swiping his bottom lip with his tongue. There was an unmistakable hunger in his eyes that made you squirm in your seat and you prayed to the gods above that he’d finally do something about all the fucking tension.

Once he sat down at his desk, you figured it was time to actually be productive. Shaking yourself out of your daze, you reached into your bag to pull out your exam, unintentionally giving him a clear view of your cleavage. The sight had his right hand twitching from its place on the wood, nearly moving to palm himself in his pants. He had a job to do, and while he had plenty of other things - all of them involving you and his desk - he needed to put that on hold, at least for a moment. 

Jake admittedly had been thinking of ways to combine helping you with… helping himself, while on the way to his office. He knew it was highly unprofessional but he couldn’t think of something that didn’t involve at least some part of him touching you. Rather than internally scold himself, he decided to give in to those thoughts. 

When he saw you place the paper on his desk in front of you, he put his hand out and shook it slightly. “No, you won’t need that right now. I already have the material you need to review.” You furrowed your brow in confusion. You had been expecting to just go through the exam, but Jake seemed to have other ideas and you had no reason to object. 

He took out a stack of papers from his bag and placed them in front of himself before pushing his chair back as if to stand up. “Come here.” He instructed. His voice was deep and sturdy and you found yourself moving over to him without a sliver of hesitation. You watched as he patted his lap, “Sit down, sweetheart.”

You looked at him in shock, not sure if he was being serious. You looked around the room, unable to keep your eyes focused on him, but you were quickly brought back as he wrapped his hand around your wrist and pulled you closer.

“Jake, I- I don’t know if that’s-”

“I said sit. Do not make me tell you again.”

You nodded your head and moved to sit on his lap, careful to not put your weight fully on him, but he immediately gripped your hips and pulled you down so you were completely seated. You tried your hardest to stay completely still, having absolutely no idea what he was planning. Jake started pointing at the notes, one of his hands remaining planted on your waist. It was truly a daunting task to pay attention to anything other than your current position. He was supposed to be helpful, not a bigger distraction.

“You’re going to review what I’ve written here. Read each paragraph 5 times, slowly to make sure you’re really absorbing it, before moving on to the next one. I’ll stop to quiz you periodically when I see fit.” Okay?

His instruction seemed simple enough, reading wasn’t difficult and his method was typically how you studied on your own so this was familiar territory. That said, you didn’t…

“Jake, why do I have to sit on your lap while I’m reading?” That’s the one part that just wasn’t clicking for you. Not that you particularly minded where you sat, but still. You figured there had to be some ulterior motive. 

Jake quirked a smile at you, slowly moving his hands over your hips. It was relaxing, but made you feel dizzy. If he kept touching you while you studied there was no way you’d be able to focus on anything.

“Because, sweetheart, I’m going to be your motivation.” He spoke the words as if his intentions should have been obvious to you. Should they have been? Motivation? He must have noticed the look of sheer confusion on your face because he spoke once more.

“You’re going to read and do your best to memorize all of what’s in front of you. If you can manage to do that, you’ll be rewarded. If you can’t, you’ll be punished. Understand?”

“Vaguely…” He had a mischievous look on his perfect face and you knew better than to disregard it. You had your hopes as to what he could’ve meant, but you never knew with him. Especially since he’d yet to actually do anything to or with you. You really hoped that would change tonight.

He smirked at you, loving that you hadn’t fully caught on to his motives yet. “Just read.” You turned to face the papers and began reading, waiting with bated breath to see what Jake would end up doing. 

Okay, Razin’s Rebellion. You could’ve sworn you remembered that one from his lectures, but you read the passage he wrote, which appeared to be a collection of important aspects, rather than a complete breakdown of the event. 

~ After massacring all who opposed him and giving the rich bazaars of the city over to pillage, Stepan Razin converted Astrakhan into a Cossack republic, dividing the population into thousands, hundreds, and tens, with their proper officers, all of whom were appointed by a general assembly, whose first act was to proclaim Razin their sovereign.

~ The tsar sent troops to suppress the revolt. As Paul Avrich notes in Russian Rebels, 1600–1800, "The brutality of the repressions by far exceeded the atrocities committed by the insurgents." The tsar's troops mutilated the rebels' bodies and displayed them in public to serve as a warning to potential dissenters.

~ Razin and his brother were captured at Kagalnik Fortress in 1671 by Cossack elders and turned over to Tsarist officials in Moscow. On June 16, following the reading of the verdict against him, Razin was quartered on the Red Square, where he was ultimately beheaded.

You read over the notes two more times, doing your best to memorize it word for word, before you noticed Jake’s hands had begun moving. Both of his hands had left their spot on your waist, slowly traveling over the tops of your thighs. Your breath hitched and you dropped the pen you’d been holding to keep your place. You leaned back into Jake’s touch, sighing at the feeling of him touching you in places he hadn’t before. But, just as quickly as his actions had started, they stopped, pulling a whine from you. 

Pushing you forward and away from his body, he addressed you. “Don’t whine. I told you to read, and you stopped. Keep going.” He couldn’t be serious.

“I was focusing just fine until you started touching me.” You sassed.

He grabbed your chin and jerked it to face him. “Did you not like it? Because it sure sounded like you were enjoying yourself.”

“Of course I liked it, so why did you stop?” You were frustrated. You didn’t want the games, you just wanted him.

“Because you stopped reading. I told you, do what you’re told and you’ll be rewarded. You want me to keep touching you? I’ll be happy to, as long as you keep reading.” You stared at him incredulously. “You stop, I stop.” 

If looks could kill Jake would be dead right now, but he laughed at your attempt to look intimidating. Patting your cheek patronizingly he spoke, “better get back to reading, huh?”

You scowled at him and turned back to continue reading, picking up from where you left off. You still had to read this section 2 more times, and lord knows what he was going to do next. Once Jake realized you had continued, his hands did as well, dragging lower down your thighs before moving back up. His hands began moving inward every time they came back up, each inch closer making your pulse race erratically. 

God you missed his touch. You hadn’t realized how badly you craved it until his hands were back on you, and even through your tights you could feel how strong they were. It took a huge amount of willpower you didn’t know you possessed to not pick up his hand and put it around your throat. There would be time for that later, you assumed.

You made your way to the next set of bullets about the French Invasion of Russia. 

~ The French invasion of Russia, also known as the Russian campaign, the Second Polish War, the Army of Twenty nations, and the Patriotic War of 1812 was launched by Napoleon Bonaparte to force the Russian Empire back into the continental blockade of the United Kingdom.

~ Within six weeks, Napoleon lost half of his men because of the extreme weather conditions, disease and hunger, winning just the Battle of Smolensk. The Russian Army continued to retreat, under its new Commander in Chief Mikhail Kutuzov, employing attrition warfare against Napoleon.

~ Although several retreating French corps united with the main army, when the Berezina was reached, Napoleon only had about 49,000 troops and 40,000 stragglers of little military value. On 5 December, Napoleon left the army at Smorgonie in a sledge and returned to Paris. Within a few days, 20,000 more perished from the bitter cold and louse-borne diseases. As many as 380,000 died in the campaign, and Napoleon’s reputation of invincibility was shattered.

As you read, all you could focus on was the way Jake’s hands moved. You wanted him to strip you down, bend you over his desk and fuck you into oblivion. Maybe if you played your cards right, he would. 

While you were in the middle of reviewing the second bullet for the second time, Jake pulled the paper away from you. You frowned at him, “Hey! I was reading that.”

He watched the pout form on your face, feeling warmth throughout his body at the sight. You were down right sexy on any given day, but god you were fucking cute. He wanted to kiss that pout so badly, to finally feel your lips on his, but he was determined to stick to his original plan. 

“Good I’m glad, seeing as that’s what you were instructed to do.” You looked away and rolled your eyes. You weren’t sure what it was about him that made you feel so bratty but you couldn’t stop yourself or your attitude. You chalked it up to the pent up sexual frustration that nagged at you like a swarm of mosquito in your ear.

Jake’s hands moved back to their place on your thick thighs, moving at a quicker pace than before and getting closer and closer to where you really wanted them to be. “Question 1- Where and when was Stepan Razin captured and what occurred after his capture?” 

You opened your mouth to answer, but right as you went to speak, Jake’s fingers slipped under your skirt. Your breathing picked up and you completely forgot what you were going to tell him.

His fingers made no attempt to stop, but he looked at you expectantly. “Come on sweet girl, you know the answer.” You swallowed harshly but nodded, calming yourself down to speak again.

“Kagalnik Fort-fortress in 1671. H-he was quartered and beheaded.” You were impressed with yourself that you could even get that out. He nodded in approval, his fingers ever so slightly brushed over the lace of your panties. He groaned under his breath at the feeling. You were so fucking warm, all he wanted was to rip the thin fabric right off your body, but he composed himself. 

“And where was he beheaded?” His fingers moved with a feather light touch that had you itching for more. He was so god damn close, but he wouldn’t stop teasing. It was driving you crazy.

You took a deep breath, “the Red Square.”

He smiled again, “good girl.” Before you could even consider responding to him, you felt the pads of his middle and ring fingers press firmly against your core through the lace. 

Fuck yes.

He gently circled his fingers over you, your head falling back onto his shoulder. Jake took advantage of the open access to your neck, immediately peppering dragged out, wet kisses against your skin. It felt incredible, the pairing of the two sensations. You found yourself softly moaning and grinding into his hands, searching shamelessly for more. 

“Keep reading. Remember, I’ll continue if you do.”

You quickly nodded and brought your attention to the paper Jake had put back in front of you. As you read the second set of bullets 3 more times, you struggled immensely. Jake hadn’t stopped touching you and it was a challenge to keep your eyes open and your head up. You desperately needed more, needed to feel his fingers inside you. 

The time passed by without you realizing, but by the time Jake moved the paper away from you to ask you the next set of questions, your stomach dropped. You couldn’t recall a single thing you read… and you had enough sense to know that was bad for you.

“Question 3- How many of Napoleon’s men died in the campaign against Russia?”

Shit. So, so stupid of you to not focus enough. No, no, that was entirely his fault. He knew what he was doing. He was setting you up because he wanted to see you squirm. God he really was the devil.

“Um… uh…” With your hesitation came the retraction of his fingers. You reached out to grab him to keep him still, but his free hand easily wrapped around both of your wrists and kept them away. “No, Jake, please. Please don’t stop. Please!”

“You want my fingers? Answer the fucking question.”

You fought the urge to groan and roll your eyes. Obviously you would’ve answered the question if you knew the fucking answer. You figured that saying that out loud would only screw you over more, though.

“I- shit, Jake, I don’t know. I don’t remember. 75,000?? I don’t know, I just- please, please don’t stop.”

With that, he removed his hand completely from beneath your skirt, and at that point you let the frustrated whine pour from your lips. 

“I warned you, sweetheart. Stand up.” Not having the energy to fight, you did as you were told, standing in front of him with your back turned towards the desk, your eyes staring up at him through thick lashes. 

He stared back at you, his gaze intense but mischievous. And then for whatever reason, it softened. You watched as he clenched his jaw and stared down at your lips, your bottom lip being bitten ever so slightly by your top teeth. Jake’s thumb came up to pull your bottom lip out, smoothing over it with the pad of his finger and smiling ever so slightly. His brows furrowed, and it seemed as though he was fighting with himself in his head. He took a deep breath and looked into your eyes before shifting his stare back to your lips. 

Was he going to kiss you? Is that what he was debating? You fully thought he was about to punish you even more for not being able to answer his question, but maybe that soft side of Jake was making another appearance.

“Jake?”

He looked back up at you, seeing the confusion written on your face. He wanted you so much more than he could describe, in every way possible. Yet there was still a nagging voice in the back of his head telling him it was a huge risk, and in all honesty, he knew that it was. He also knew that he wouldn’t be able to handle being around you as much as he had been if he forced himself to keep things professional. He wasn’t even sure he could actually be successful in doing that.

“I probably should’ve said this a while ago, and I know it’s shitty of me that I didn’t. I wasn’t thinking and that’s my fault. I just feel like before I do anything else, before we do anything else, I need to be completely transparent.”

He’d never been this serious with you, and you weren’t sure how to feel about it. You replayed his words in your head a few times, suddenly filled with anxiety and nausea. You stepped away from him and put your hands up between the two of you.

“Jake… please do not tell me you’re married.” You were probably shaking like a chihuahua. You refused to be a home wrecker. God a married man screwing around with his student?? That would be awful, so terribly awful. You’d feel like shit. Granted you’ve never seen him wear a wedding band, though he does wear a lot of r-

“Married?? What?? No, I’m not married.Why would you- oh. Okay, I could have phrased that way better than I did, I’m sorry sweetheart.” He moved closer to you and took your hands in his, both of you looking down at where you were connected. 

“You have no fucking idea how badly I want you, how often I think about you. How many times I’ve had to stop myself from tossing you over my desk in that classroom and fucking the daylights out of you in front of every other student.” You shuddered at his confession. You had a feeling that was likely the case, but hearing the confirmation was exhilarating. 

“But you have to understand how much is at risk if someone finds out about this.” You weren’t sure this was even a thing yet, but you elected to not interrupt him. “I could lose my job, you could get expelled. Someone could twist it and say that I took advantage of you. I don’t want any of that to happen to either of us.”

“Jake, if you don't want to risk it, I understand. I wouldn't blame you at all.” It would suck, sure, but you didn't want to completely fuck over his - or your - entire life.

He pulled you into him, not a single inch separating your bodies. He moved your hair over your shoulder, taking a brief pause to play with one of the curls. Taking advantage of the now fully unobstructed expanse of your throat, he bent down to trail kisses along the skin. His lips felt like electricity on your body and you couldn't get enough of it, lopping your fingers around the belt loops of his pants to keep him close. Your eyes fluttered shut and your mouth ran dry, soft sighs tumbling out from between your own lips. Lips that were begging to be on his.

“Oh angel. Haven't I shown you just how much I want you? Haven't I been horrendously obvious?” You smiled as he continued kissing your throat, moving up to nip at your earlobe.

You pushed him away, just briefly, to look into his eyes. “You might have to show a bit more Jake. I’m not sure I fully got the message.”

Excitement flashed in his eyes and without another thought, his lips crashed against yours. You both sighed and relaxed into the kiss, as if you were both on edge just waiting for this very moment. Truth be told, you both were. Your hands wrapped around his neck while his moved to pick you up from under your ass. 

Mumbling against your lips, he commanded, “jump” and you did just that. Jake cleared off his desk, shoving the papers and books to the floor without hesitation, and sat you on top of the polished wood.

You didn't have it in you to take things slow, so without breaking the kiss you grabbed his shirt from where it buttoned up and tugged as hard as you could, sending the buttons flying across the room. He groaned in response and you finally moved to feel his bare chest. So warm, just like you remembered. 

Jake unzipped your skirt and slid it off your body with ease. He then moved down, breaking the kiss to your dismay, and unclasped your bodysuit, immediately ridding it from your body as well. At that point you were left in your tights, your boots, and a brand new black lace lingerie set that you may or may not have purchased with a certain professor in mind.

He tossed his head back and moaned. “You're going to be the fucking death of me.” The way your breasts were practically pouring out of the bra sent him reeling. On a different day when he didn't feel like a feral animal he’d take more time to appreciate every inch of you. But today was certainly not one of those days, and Jake borderline ripped the fabric from your body. He needed to see you exposed in front of him, and god, what a sight you were.

His lips attached to one of your breasts, sucking and biting so perfectly. One of his hands came down to massage the other, while his free hand moved down to finally touch you without the barrier of clothing. Two of his fingers slipped between your folds and you both moaned loudly. 

“Shit, you're fucking soaked. Who made you this wet baby? Tell me.” His fingers felt incredible, but you needed so much more. As if he could read your mind, Jake inserted those fingers into your dripping heat and curled them with expert precision. 

You threw your head back and moaned, words being nearly impossible to form. “Y-you, Jake. Fuck, don’t stop.” You didn’t have it in you to be embarrassed by how quickly you were reaching your climax. You’d been so worked up from the tension alone that by the time Jake was actually touching you, you were putty in his hands, and he knew it too.

“Won’t stop baby. Wanna see you cum all over my fingers. Come on sweetheart, give it to me.” His voice was like the finest silk, and your body immediately responded to his command, shaking from the intensity of your orgasm.

Once you had calmed down enough, you moved to kneel in front of Jake, your hands already reaching for his belt, but he stopped you and shook his head. You looked up at him in confusion.

“Believe me, I’d love to shove my cock into that gorgeous mouth and watch you choke on it, but I need to fuck you right now.” Your body shook at his filthy words, wanting nothing more than to hear him continue speaking. It wouldn’t be shocking at all if he could get you off with just his words alone. Maybe you’d try to test that out one day.

You nodded and brought your hands back to his belt, quickly undoing it, along with the button and zipper of his pants. He chuckled at your eagerness but pushed his pants down and spun you around to bend you over his desk. His hands caressed your body with a softness that would surely juxtapose his next actions. Jake spread you open and glided his fingers through your pussy a few more times before spreading the wetness that had accumulated on his fingers over his cock. He was throbbing and needed to be inside you so badly, he thought if he didn’t fuck you he’d explode.

Not wasting anymore time, Jake sheathed himself fully inside of you, collapsing onto your back and taking deep breaths for a moment before collecting himself, pushing up, and beginning to fuck into you mercilessly. The sounds coming from both of your mouths, as well as skin slapping harshly against skin, were bouncing off the walls. All you knew was him, all you could think about was him. Just Jake and how fucking incredible he felt. The stretch was delicious and you welcomed the minor sting of pain, one that quickly dissolved into sheer pleasure.

“Jesus Christ, you feel so fucking amazing wrapped around me.” He moaned out. He grabbed your hair and pulled you back, the new angle making you scream. He licked a stripe up your neck and bit your ear lobe before biting it gently. “God, you’re taking my cock so fucking well sweetheart. Such a good girl for me.” 

Your eyes rolled back into your head at his words, pussy clenching around him. He groaned in your ear. “Don’t do that sweetheart, don’t fucking- fuck- I’m gonna cum if you keep that up.”

Clenching again, you smirked, knowing he couldn’t see it due to your current position. You heard him scoff in response, a sound that was cut off by his own whiny moan. 

“Yeah? Is that what you want? You want me to cum? Such a desperate little slut. Come on baby, beg for my fucking cum.” 

Jake’s pace picked up, his thrusts pushing you harder into the desk you were leaning on. You felt your second orgasm coming and knew it wouldn’t take much before you reached that peak again. You opened your mouth to tell him exactly what he wanted to hear, but you were cut off by the feeling of his fingers reaching around to rub quick circles over your clit. The only sounds coming out of you were screams of his name and an assortment of curses as you came around him. 

He felt animalistic, a low growl booming from his chest at the sound of his name falling off your perfect lips. It was the greatest thing Jake had ever heard in his life and he knew he’d be doing whatever he could after this to hear that beautiful noise over and over. 

“Come on Jake, pl-please. Need it so badly, want you to cum. Please, Jake. Please!” You’d beg as much as he wanted, but you could tell he was close, his dick twitching inside of you and his thrusts losing their rhythm. 

“Shit, yeah. Gonna cum. So good, so fucking good.” You felt Jake move to pull out and you reached back to grab his wrist, turning to face him and shaking your head.

“Inside.” His head dropped at the simple demand. You really would be the death of him.

“Fucking hell, yeah, yeah okay. Fuck okay.” His voice came out as a raspy whisper, even he was too fucked out to properly speak. “Gonna fill this tight little pussy with my cum.”

With just a few more thrusts, you felt him spill inside you, both of you moaning at the feeling. Jake slumped over you once he was done riding out his orgasm, both of you completely spent and out of breath. After a minute, he lifted himself up, placing a gentle kiss on your shoulder and pulling out. You stood up, moving to walk over to where your clothing had been thrown, but faltering as your legs buckled under you. 

Jake reached out to grab your arm and hold you steady, chuckling a bit. You scowled at him, poking his chest. “Don’t laugh at me, this is your fault.”

His laugh only got louder at your accusation. “You’re right. I’m sorry for fucking you senseless and making it hard for you to walk. It’ll never happen again.”

This time you stared at him, masking your worry with a raised brow as if to question if he meant those words. He raised his hands in the air.

“That was a joke, I promise.” 

“It better be.”

“Trust me, I’m not done with you. Now get dressed, we’re going back to my place.”

You rushed to put your clothing back on as he did the same. “Round two?” You asked, hoping the answer would be yes. Sure, you could barely move, but you couldn’t get enough of him.

He smirked, reaching for your hand and pulling you towards the door. “And three, if you can handle it.”

--------------------------------------------------------------

taglist: @allieboop @obetrolncocktails @greta-flanveet @kdarling1 @doodle417 @mollie-gvf @hoeforstevienicks @joshkiszkas @gardenofgreta @gretasmokerising @lunaindigoraven @jakekiszkasleftnutsack @jakewhorecore @teddiie @sammiejane22 @gretavanbitches @jordierama @skankforjakekiszka @fantazmagorical96 @gretavangroove @heartsbomb @gvfrry @myownparadise96 @richjaaasss @mywaykiszka @cyliegvf

#jake kiszka #jake kizka gvf #jake kiszka fic #jake kiszka smut #gvf #greta van fleet #gretavanfleet #jake kiszka gvf fic #my fics #gvf fic #greta van fleet fic

[nightcolorz]

I'm so sorry I don't mean to be rude or coming for you or anything but can I ask a question? Didn't you have a post about gender recently and you said the amc iwtv show was about gay MEN? So why are you tagging Louis art with female terms? Again, I'm so sorry, I just don't understand and I think I'm probably missing something. I'm trying to learn more about gender things but it's very confusing for me. Thank you for your time 💚

dont apologize anon ur not being rude! I'm not rlly sure how to explain this, I'm gonna try my best 😭 so sorry if this is only more confusing. At least the way I see it, AMC iwtv and the tvc books handle gender very differently. Tvc vampires r described as not rlly having genders bcus of there vampirism and lack of alignment with humanity and mortal concepts of the gender binary. The way Anne rice saw it was since their genitals no longer work they r no longer male or female and so since they r so disconnected from the societal expectations around gender along with this bcus of how gender roles r always changing and vampires r outside of time, they r essentially gender neutral. The amc show (at least of now) doesn't seem to be going this route, although it does play around with gender norms and stuff, the vampires do seem to be cis men essentially (obvs ppl can have there head cannons and my read doesn't invalidate any trans reads of AMC iwtv that exist). But since they do just have cis normative sex with each other, vampirism doesn't rlly change there sexualities or gender expression, and they do identify and present gender the way gay men would, I don't see the amc vamps as particularly gender less the way the tvc vamps r. I made a post about this B4 that summarizes my thoughts much better then this or the post ur referring to (which was kinda crap which is why I deleted it 😭).

But anyways, I call Louis she/her pronouns on art (specifically Kate @loelett art love u babe) bcus Kate and I rlly like this aspect of the books, and since we talk about the gender fluidity in tvc a lot we've started using she he and they pronouns interchangeably for the vamps (mostly Louis cus Louis is Kate's fav character so we talk about him the most lol). When I call Louis she/her pronouns or feminine terms it's not cuz I see him as a woman or perceive him as particularly feminine, it's more cuz I see him as genderless so using any pronouns for him is natural to me. I usually call Louis she her when I'm especially excited about him 😭 idk maybe bcus of the cultural association with she/her + feminity and softness/loveliness and affection (like the way u call a boat she/her y'know? Or a beloved car), or maybe bcus most of my close loved ones r women so using she her is natural when it comes to compliments and affectionate terms for me. Anyways I hope this makes sense or clears things up, tbh I am very surprised that ppl I'm not friends with even perceive my blog at all sometimes so I never considered how I may have been confusing ppl 😭

#Tvc #Asks

[wubwubnparmaham]

You writers are soooo incredible, I don't understand how you do it. i've been following you for years, and you JUST. KEEP. HITTING. i've never reeally tried to write, well maybe once but it wasnt that good. what is it even like to create something this massive as love endless and get to look back on it like "dam i really did that." ig on behalf of all of us readers, i just wanna thank you! <3 <3

You're a gemmm. By "this massive" I know you mean by word count, cuz it definitely isn't a famous fandom tale by any means, more like an underground cult classic people happen to vibe with, but I digress. Writing is fucking stupid hard, and anyone who tells you differently doesn't put much emotion into what they do. I'm a drug addict (9 years clean but God do I miss the rage), so love endless to me is a HUGE allegory for drug abuse, and sometimes it took a lot out of me to write about overdoses and cravings and whatnot, because I go through life constantly just wishing I could have all that back even if it ruined my life (gettin real stupidly deep here, bear with me), and I wrote things like all the opium they did to live even more vicariously, sooooo jealous of the fact that they could bask in opiates indefinitely and nothing bad would ever happen to them and they wouldn't experience the bad sides. I've also lost a lot of people, friends and family, to expected or unexpected and tragic deaths, some of them drug-related but all, so I wrote in the return of the dead cuz, ya know, what I wouldn't give to bring some of those beautiful people back in my life. OYCBMA (the story I'm ironically more known for) has tons of personal life shit baked into it too, of a different kind.

Overall, it's no overstatement to say that one puts one's soul into one's writing, and the same goes for any creative expression / passion. It's a release, and sometimes, therapy for trauma. I have other books in the works that deal with other things absent from my ao3 stories, like sexual abuse and that sorta shit that I went through for years, and it's just all around liberating to write through emotions like that, but also immensely difficult sometimes, and potentially re-traumatizing.

That said I am proud, yes, and sometimes I'm like hell yeah, this is my legacy, as small as it is, it's enough—because actually, my deepest, darkest feelings are irrevocably entwined with it, so to say it means everything to me for people to support the story is an understatement. It's so much more ❤️ in my twisted perspective, it's like you're supporting MY life story without knowing it lolol, even if I'm just the man behind the curtain.

Ig my advice if you do wanna write is just to let your emotions guide the way. If you do that, it'll touch people, and a sort of pseudo-bond will grow between author and reader, and it'll feel nice and communal. Idk man I have lots to say on this topic, but I'll cut it. Didn't mean to say this much anyway.

In conclusion, thanks for your support! I appreciate it ☺️

[thatgirl4815]

Hi, I liked your analysis a lot for Vegas/Pete so I wanted to hear your opinion on few things: 1) Pete had blissful smile after the sex scene in ep 12, like he really liked it nd enjoyed the whole experience but in ep 13 when they are on the bed he is not in the mood and far from happy. So what happened in the mean time? Was Vegas being sometimes violent again or was he simply missing his freedom, or did he felt betrayed by Vegas for putting chains on him again or something else?

Hi! :) First, thank you so much! I'm glad you like it! 💕

Now to your points. About Pete's blissful smile after the sex scene: I've seen a lot of discourse around it very similar to the torture scene in Ep10 when Pete smiles--by that I mean I've noticed a lot of people interpret it as proof that Pete is as unhinged as Vegas. I personally disagree with this.

Having sex with Vegas was an impulsive decision on Pete's part, and he knows that in Ep13. He smiles right after because he's still caught up in those emotions, still high off of the feelings coursing through him. I also don't think Pete has had experience where BDSM is concerned, so that could play a role in his ecstasy immediately afterwards; he's still coming off of that thrill. Pete was resisting Vegas's advances in the moments leading up to the sex scene, but his own attraction won out and pushed him over the edge. He looks at Vegas and smiles, but I don't think he really sees Vegas, the captor, in that moment; he sees the man who just sparked all these emotions in him.

That brings me to Pete in Ep13, who is most definitely not happy about what went down in Ep12. In the moments we couldn't see, I imagine Pete had time to recover from his whirlwind of lust and passion enough to look at the situation objectively and realize just how dangerous this is for him. Even when they're on the bed, like you say, he doesn't seem remotely close to that state of euphoria he was in right after the sex. I think it's intentional to show us how truly conflicted he is. Vegas is Vegas, the man responsible for all of his suffering, and now Pete has to confront that without stronger sexual emotions standing in the way.

"So what happened in the mean time? Was Vegas being sometimes violent again or was he simply missing his freedom, or did he felt betrayed by Vegas for putting chains on him again or something else?"

I don't think Vegas was being violent again, because I assume this scene happens relatively soon after the events of Ep12 (probably twenty or so minutes after? Idk, it's really impossible to say). Vegas seems content and happy when they're laying side by side, and we know that his father is what really drives him to violence, so I don't think he made any moves against Pete in the parts we couldn't see. I don't think what Pete is going through here has much to do with Vegas's actions toward him since the sex scene--though I could see him having a moment of realization when Vegas presumably put the chain on him. I think it's all to do with the fact that Pete has recovered enough to realize the predicament he's in. Because things were bad before, but now he's racked with the realization that yes, he did in fact just have sex with his captor. And worse--he enjoyed it. He even initiated it.

I think there are a lot of layers to Pete's expressions, but all in all, I think the smile was meant to show us the state of bliss Pete was in, while the less-cheerful mood at the beginning of Ep13 demonstrates that Pete is coming to terms with what it all means. He's had enough distance to try to process it, but he's only made himself terribly confused.

#kinnporsche #kinnporsche the series #vegaspete #thank you for this ask! #💕💕 #But the transition from happy Pete to confused Pete to distraught Pete was crippling for me I have to say #🥺🥺 #ask #kinnporsche ask #I would love to keep talking about this and I'm interested to know what others think about Pete this ep because he stole the show #as I've been saying since the ep came out lol

[spurgie-cousin]

What is the deal with Paedon Brown?? I just started watching sister wives and I'm missing a lot of context, buf if his sister is telling the public not to trust much of what he says, I assume something big happened

So I don't know if I have the whole story bc I haven't carved out any time to dive into either Paedon or Gwen's personal videos yet, outside of what reddit and tumblr feed me, but from what I understand:

Paedon's chosen to be very right-leaning socially and politically, and that directly affects Gwen because he openly disagrees with her sexuality and has said so in videos (he's done the same to their trans sibling Leon in addition to deadnaming them and using incorrect pronouns when talking about them). He voted for Trump and per everyone involved (Gwen, Leon, Paedon, parents) he has had really serious arguments and altercations with a lot of family members about that. I think he's also expressed doubt about Gwen's autism diagnosis.

At some point during an argument (not totally sure about the timeline), Paedon slapped Gwen across the face and I guess it scared her enough that she didn't want to be alone with him anymore. Those two also have a history of being kept separate even as younger kids, and I'm not sure if the slap was the cause of that back then or if it was something that happened more recently. Regardless, they just have a history of not getting along very well.

All of the above has put Paedon on bad terms with a lot of his family per some of the parents/siblings. I don't think he has great relationships with many of his siblings from any of the moms currently and per Kody is kind of an 'outsider' right now.

What's weird to me about Gwen saying he's untrustworthy is that a lot of what they both have been talking about as far as their childhoods seems to line up?? Paedon does seem like a dogshit person in many ways but I haven't yet heard anything from him that sounds like a blatant lie or that doesn't have direct supporting evidence, so idk.

Those are just the bits and pieces I've picked up along the way, again I don't think I have the whole story.

#sister wives #paedon brown #gwendlyn brown

[wrotelovelytears]

This just some personal astro observations:

🔩😒Ever since my Moon started transiting Virgo (which in Sidereal is my natal Moon sign), I've been doing more natural looks. Like I wear gloss versus lipsticks, monotone eye shadow vs glittery ones and even more flowy dresses and outfits.

🔩😒When it was in Leo (so the past two years). I was a lot more expressive with my clothing choices. I also was a lot more bolder in general, now I'm more laid back and less concerned about how others perceive me.

🔩😒🔩😒🔩😒🔩😒🔩😒🔩😒🔩😒🔩😒

🔩😒I will say I did a chart for my senior year of high school (which was actually garbage speaking that I missed half due to physical and mental health issues), and I'm not surprised to find my transit Moon was in Scorpio. I was also a Scorpio Rising that year. I went through so much shit that idk if I'm ready for the next Scorpio Moon transit I'll have.

Another set of notes about that particular year's chart:

🔩😒Tw Death- I had a close friend die that year (Pluto was in my 3rd house)

🔩😒I learned what I wanted to do in life (North Node/Sun conjunction in my 11th house) after having one of the best jobs I've ever had (I worked with young kids/babies and the elderly)

🔩😒I fell out with a bunch of other friends (conflicting schedules, being left out of things, miscommunication, and our lives just going different ways) (Mercury Retrograde in 11th)

This a side note and maybe a general observation but: Maybe Mercury Rx in a chart can show the type of people you struggle to communicate with that year.

Another one in terms of the 11th house but Rx planets can hint at endings of friendships due to the planets theme.

🔩😒Since Lilith was in my first house conjunct my Moon (and my ascendant).... I was sexualized so much. I got stalked multiple times that year. Followed by grown ass adults (who knew I was a minor) to my school. Got slut shamed by random folks. Like I don't want to talk about triggering topics but yeah.

Last time I had a Scorpio Rising (with the ruler being in 3rd (again)) I also had one of the worst years of my life. Parents got divorced. I had a horrible summer camp experience. Got kidnapped (0 outta 10 would never want to experience that again). My grandma died. I moved... Yeah wouldn't stan a Scorpio rising for shit.

🔩😒I was extremely social that year (Sun in 11th) and I actually made friends with some famous people and had a large Instagram page (mostly writing about activism and daily life) (Sun also in Virgo)

🔩😒I had hot bitch privilege (even if it didn't always work out in my favor). I literally had a glow up that year, people started approaching me more and I was a lot more in tune with what looks good on me/makes me feel pretty. I also was in and out of a "not the best" relationship. It was giving codependent (Libra Venus in 12th)

🔩😒I had Uranus transiting my 6th house... It was also retrograde so no wonder I felt like actual shit. Also it was in Aries... And yes I did get hospitalized TWICE for mental health related reasons (and had seizures too which was great).

🔩😒The amount of projections I had to deal with was ridiculous. Also the amount of time I disassociated (but was very creative and able to make some really good art) was also ridiculous. (Neptune Rx in 5th house).

🔩😒I actually started inner child work that year with my therapist. It was great (besides the acknowledging shitty things), I learned a lot about how my current actions are explained by my past, and how I have always been a bit too trusting and it sometimes backfired. (Chiron Rx in 5th)

🔩😒In terms of finances I.... Well I made money and spent it to feel better. Meaning I had no money so I had to make more. Just to spend it again. (We love a Saturn 2nd house appearance)

🔩😒As much as I wanna drag that damn Rx Pluto, I learned to stick up for myself. Especially in writing or from friends (or people I just associate with). I learned about various communication methods and when/how/ and why to or not, communicate. (3rd house)

Its kinda funny how most of this ended up being about my senior year in high school. I guess at the end of either this Moon transit or year, I'll have more tales about the Solar Return and overall transits that really impacted me

#astro tumblr #astrology #astroblr #astrology observations #astro observations #nymph hums #nymph writes astrology

[itstheelvenjedi]

~couple questions~ for when you need an excuse to talk about your characters/ship 😽

8, 10, 16, 19, 22 and 25

Pick your fav pairings with your tav.

These are from the [~Couple Questions~: For When You need An Excuse to Talk About your Characters/Ship] list for anyone who either wants the list or wants to send some more!

Sorry this one took a while @csphire, I too got a little carried away and wrote probably way more than I was supposed to bwahahaha But I hope you enjoy! 😉 Obligatory disclaimer that there's some very horny/suggestive things in some of these answers, and also there WILL be spoilers for the plot of the game so like. Do not read if you're someone who hates spoilers and hasn't played through the whole game yet etc etc.

Also, I'm playing loosey-goosey with the lore in some respects because I'm here to have a good time, not a 100% canon compliant time. If you don't like that then just stay off my posts for the sake of both our sanities, I beg of you 🙏Rai is a polyamorous bisexual disaster and has a closed polycule with Karlach, Wyll and Dammon (tho I'm going on ~vibes~ and Wyll and Dammon aren't romantically/sexually involved bc I just didn't get that vibe from them while writing. It's a "ah yes, my girlfriends and their cool boyfriend : )" situation from both sides for the guys. They're purely platonic but they both love their girls a whole lot.) And before someone says it, no I don't care that it's not canon in-game. I don't need it to be canon in-game to do it anyway and I will die on this hill so don't try me /hj

commence the spoilers/horniness/etc under the cut! last chance to click away if you don't want to see that! XD (oh also trigger warning for mentions of child abuse/mistreatment, and...idk how best to word it other than discussions of being trained as a child soldier and references to past abuse and trauma. I've tried to blanket cover with trigger tags but ask if you'd like me to add any others I've missed!)

What do they find physically sexiest about each other? Going with Rai and Wyll for this one bc I think they have the best answers! ☺️

Rai: The ✨horns✨. Listen. I get why he's upset about them at first. I do. I totally get it. But come ooooonnnnn!! You CANNOT tell me those babies are anything except sexy as FUCK to tieflings. They're fucking beautiful horns, and I like to think Rai's a big factor in Wyll learning to "live with" his horns and maybe eventually like them. Just a little bit. She loves his horns and she'll use any excuse in the book to get her hands all over them. At first she was offering to help him with the horn care because he really had no clue & asked her & Karlach for help (tho Karlach wasn't touchable at the time so Rai had to step up for the physical "here like this" demonstration and that's prolly where it started lol) then it became a little intimacy habit between them, he doesn't need her help anymore but he's not going to say "no" if she asks/offers, ya know? :3 (honourable mention to the time drunk Wyll at the Grove party complained very loudly about having "bumps and stuff where they absolutely should not be" because Rai's only reaction to that was "OOH~ 👀💖" hahaha)

Wyll: This might sound like a weird one, but probably her tail? Rai's very tail-expressive, if she doesn't force it to keep still by wrapping it around her own leg (or someone else *wink wink*) then it's ALWAYS moving around or giving away her emotions in some way! It started out innocent enough in that his eyes were automatically drawn to it because it moves around so much. Even despite growing up in Baldur's Gate for some time and thus being around a fair few tieflings (from my limited understanding of the lore and stuff thus far, don't lynch me hardcore fans, I've never played tabletop 5E or the other baldur's gate games lmao) he'd never met a tiefling that moved their tail so much until he met Rai. But now he can't help but stare when he thinks she isn't looking (she totally knows and does things with it on purpose sometimes just to tease him because she knows Wyll is staring. Rai and Karlach have a running (playfully ofc) bet going about how long it's going to take Wyll to figure out that she knows he stares, he hasn't figured it out just yet 😉 lol) Honourable mention for her eyes bc he thinks they're very pretty uwu and not at all for smutty eye-contact reasons cough I mean what

What was their last big fight? What did they learn from it? You get a two-for-one with this one bc the two fights are interconnected (pov: one half of your polycule gets into a pretty major lovers' tiff and the other half gets dragged into it as collateral damage anyway. Sorry boys lol )

Both these fights are also the focal plot beats for a Hurt/Comfort oneshot, but alas, I can't get away with being too vague with this or the reasons why it was a fight kinda don't match up with the "what they learned from it" in the 2nd part of the question, so just act surprised a while from now when I post the fic, ok? XD(I've got all the dialogues and whatnot plotted out now, just gotta convert it to written prose 🫶 ) This one ran away with me and got REALLY long, sorry (or you're welcome, I guess? lol)

Rai and Karlach: disclaimer: I know in-game it all kinda happens in the same convo but for some ~creative liberty~ (because I love me some good ol' Hurt/Comfort angst) I chopped the convo in half with the first bit happening before the fight (bc something Karlach says in the heat of the moment kicks it all off) and the latter half of Karlach realizing she does still want to live and is upset that she's still dying happening a couple days later, after the spat is resolved.

Karlach technically starts it after she hits out when they've killed Gortash but I wanna be clear when I say both of them are at fault for it. This is not only their biggest fight but also a powder-keg type of situation where things built up over time till they both exploded at eachother for different reasons, see below :

Karlach's very stubborn about not wanting to go back to Avernus at first - even into Act 3. Wyll and Rai ofc offer to go with her, but initially that doesn't help Karlach feel better. The worst thing she could possibly think of is putting two of the people she loves more than anything through the nightmare that is the Blood War. So when Rai keeps bringing it up and keeps pushing her about it, she snaps. Listen, I love Karlach a LOT and I think she means well, genuinely, and would never hurt her partner's feelings on purpose/maliciously. But she's a Yeller when she gets mad - and with Rai that is a BAD kind of mad to be. We see this in-game especially if you have her with you when you run into Gortash, and her heartbreaking meltdown after you kill him.

Logically, Rai knows the autonomy of getting to make that decision - to choose her freedom even if it means that it comes with death as an unwanted consequence - is important to Karlach, and if she was thinking logically at the time she would of course want to respect that. In theory. In practise however, it turned out "just sit there and watch me die" was not a line Rai was willing to draw. She gets pushy about Dammon's suggestion that they should take Karlach back to Avernus to stabilize her Engine, even when Karlach insists she's made her mind up and doesn't want to talk about it anymore. Rai keeps bringing it up over and over again, and insisting that she and Wyll would both go with her if it'd make it less scary for her, and just refuses to take "no" for an answer etc etc

By the time they kill Gortash and Karlach has her little meltdown she's just had enough of Rai throwing the suggestion into what feels like damn-near every conversation they've had since Dammon broke the news to them in Last Light. So she loses her temper and starts shouting before Rai can say it again.

And the thing about Rai is…she's emotionally reactionary. Whatever energy you give her, she'll bounce right back to you, she can't help it and hasn't quite figured out how to stop doing it at that point in time (though she does get better at it in the future!). If you keep your voice calm and level, she might growl and snap her teeth or smack her tail on something a little bit but eventually she'll match your energy and chill out to just talk about things. But if you yell and scream and shout and call her names? She's gonna yell, scream, and call you names back.

And that's exactly what happens. It's a huge miscommunication/misunderstanding between both of them. Karlach makes assumptions about Rai's past despite the fact that unlike Wyll and Dammon, she'd never really asked Rai about her childhood in Elturel or anything like that (again, I'll stress that I don't think this was done with deliberate malice, but I feel like being a little bit selfish is a realistic character flaw for Karlach to have. She's been through a lot and she gets tunnel-visioned on solving her own problems and when you pair that with Rai's brand of "too busy trying to fix everybody else to fix myself" trauma response and it's just an unfortunate combination. Rai never brought her own trauma up, and Karlach never thought to ask) So as a result, she thinks Rai "got lucky" not being in Elturel when it fell and that as a result, Rai is naïve and doesn't know "how bad" Avernus really was. Meanwhile, while she's certainly not as well-acquainted with it as Karlach and Dammon, Rai's not as ignorant as Karlach thinks. Her Mother Superior was a necromancy wizard, and one of Zariel's goons. The temple where Rai was "taken in" and raised was really just a front for training up either spellcasters or sword-fighters (depending on an individual's aptitude and uhh, the way they figured out where to funnel them was to use them as magical target practise until they either threw a spell back at their "tutors" or the staff agreed that it had been long enough and "they're too slow/useless at magic so idk just give them a sword I guess", basically - most of Rai's scars come from the early years where she was used as every other "student"'s magical punching bag, the rest are from Avarice's rituals, except for the one on the end of her tail which she got when Elturel came back and Rai didn't know the tieflings had been exiled so went back to try and look for Dammon, Rolan, Cal and Lia and ended up being attacked and driven off instead) to be ultimately sent to Avernus for Zariel to toss into the Blood War. She's been the unwilling participant in far too many necromancy rituals and while I haven't quite hammered out the full details of this yet, they were definitely not nice and she's definitely ended up looking some brand of devil or other in the eye before, during said rituals. I'm very much going for the angle of if Rai hadn't been assumed dead and left where she'd run off into the woods and she HAD been in Elturel when it went down? She'd have been just as fucked as Karlach was with Gortash. Straight to the Blood War with her, she would've been Infernal Engine prototype 2.0 and she and Karlach would've met fighting in the Blood War. Karlach doesn't know any of this, and thus makes a flippant off-hand comment that rubs the salt right into the open wound that is Rai's survivor's guilt without fully realising she's done it. Instead of staying to talk it out, Rai gets even angrier and storms off despite poor Wyll's best attempts to try and get between them and calm them down.

Dammon and Karlach: After Rai storms off, she finds herself going straight to Forge of the Nine. It's not a surprise really. She's known Dammon the longest and because Rai already felt bad that Wyll was in-between her and Karlach during their fight (they were having a screaming match in the middle of camp, it wasn't exactly quiet, or pretty D: ) she didn't want to make it worse for him by forcing him to pick a side, so Rai made the choice for Wyll and went to Dammon. Rai's so upset at first that Dammon's terrified Karlach's engine has exploded and Rai's here to tell him she's dead. When he finally calms her down enough for Rai to tell him what actually happened, he…doesn't feel that much better. He's too worried about Rai to go marching back to camp and confront Karlach himself, especially when she asks him "can I stay here tonight? I don't want to go back just yet". But he does stew (I like to think Dammon isn't one to get angry often. And even when he does he's not loud and shouty about it. It's more a broody, quiet, "give you the silent treatment" type of thing)

Karlach's the one, after she's calmed down, who ends up checking Dammon's place when the rest of the party split up the next morning to go looking for Rai after they realize she's still gone. Rai sleeps through Karlach's knocking (she had a hard night, did a lot of yelling/screaming and crying, ya girl passed tf out once Dammon wrangled her into a bath & then bed to sleep it off ;-; ) but Dammon doesn't. He tries to be patient with Karlach but when she starts posturing and growling and snapping at him, Dammon loses his temper right back. Again, he's not a Scream And Shout kind of angry but he is a "Do not raise your fucking voice at me!" kind of angry. It's a side of him that Karlach hasn't seen before and it stuns her so much that it shuts her right up, but Dammon keeps going. He ends up reading Karlach a bit of a riot act about how much, exactly, she'd hurt Rai's feelings because Rai was probably never going to admit it to Karlach herself and it gives Karlach some serious cause for self-reflection. Dammon and Karlach's fight only gets broken up when their back-and-forth finally gets through Rai's Sleepiness and she wakes up and stumbles down the stairs to find them mid-argument. Karlach feels so guilty when she locks eyes with Rai over Dammon's shoulder that she apologises on the spot, which leads to Rai apologising too and they work it out with a little bit of mutual encouragement from Dammon <3

As for what they learned from it: Rai defo gets the longest list but I'll do all 3 of them again bc why the hell not lol

Rai definitely learns to not let her emotions make her careless/less aware of her partners' feelings. As an orphan who was treated more like a tool/weapon by the main parental figure in her life (part of the reason, like Astarion and Karlach, that Astarion and Rai are besties. Cazador treated Astarion like a possession, Avarice raised Rai as a weapon and they're kindred spirits of sorts as a result despite Astarion complaining about Rai being "too nice" XD) for most of her formative years, Rai's emotional maturity very much comes from her stumbling face-first into the lessons/epiphanies herself lol

So she learns to be a bit less "keep my shit to myself but expect everyone to let me deal with their shit" and take up a bit more space/be a bit more communicative about her own trauma. "I can't carry it for you, but I can carry you" and "Avernus fucking sucks and they're all haunted by it in some way or another" are the two overarching themes for Rai and her polycule 💖

She also learns to be a bit less impulsive. She ran off because she didn't want to force Wyll to "pick a side", but ended up doing exactly that to BOTH the boys, because she ran off first without thinking it through logically.

Karlach has a little "oh, shit" moment when Dammon sets her straight and she realizes that she never actually asked Rai anything about her time in Elturel or what it was like for her/why she danced around the subject. She just…made assumptions and didn't fact check or think that maybe her assumptions could've been wrong.

For my "version" of the story the snowball effect from this fight culminates in Karlach ultimately deciding that she doesn't want to die. She wants to LIVE. So when they get to the dock at the very end and Rai and Wyll tell her "we won't make the decision for you, but whatever you choose, we're with you". And she chooses Avernus in the end, because even though she's fucking terrified, the fact that after everything they've all been through with something from Avernus dogging their every effort to get away from it, both Rai and Wyll are still willing to go back too. For her. And if they can do it for her, then she can do it for them, and maybe buy Dammon enough time to figure out how to fix her heart for good. (I'm not crying you're crying /lh)

And she also learns that while she has a right to make her own decisions, she cannot presume to make those same decisions for anyone else in the polycule just because she thinks she's protecting them by doing it. She can make those decisions for herself, but she has to let them make theirs sometimes too, even if they're not the decision Karlach wanted them to make.

(honourable/slightly joke-y mention: "Don't piss off Dammon. He's scarier than any Raging barbarian when he's angry" lol)

Bonus Dammon, bc I love him and he's kinda a package deal with Rai /jk. Who gets to wrestle a little bit with guilt (it was his suggestion that snowballed into making his girls fight, after all ;-; ), the guilt from this fight is the straw that broke the camel's back in a biiiiiig pile of guilt he's been carrying around since Rai "disappeared" and he just believed Avarice when she said she was dead and never thought to try looking for her etc. He has to learn to make peace with it, before it starts eating him alive, sort of deal. ;3; Also feel like he gets a bit more comfortable with making his voice heard despite his general introverted nature. If he hadn't been a bit firmer with Karlach she might not have stayed quiet long enough to listen and the spat might've been a lot more drawn out than it ended up being so he gets a gold star for that hahaha

How do they react when the other is upset? How do they try to help?

Sorta-kinda talked about this one in question 10 with Rai and Dammon and Rai and Wyll so I'll do Rai and Karlach for this one! :3

I'd say it depends? Unlike Dammon who just gets angry but not necessarily violent, Rai and Karlach both have a tendency to get aggresisve/violent when the other one is hurt/upset. If its a specific person whose made them upset (and you know. it's not someone they already know/just a misunderstanding between friends) they will start threatening and even actually hurt the person responsible if they can get their hands on them. Be careful with upsetting the other one because you will have a homicidal tiefling on your ass and when she catches you she will rip you in half. Trust me on that one. If Wyll and/or Dammon can't talk her down.

When Raphael starts bothering Rai during the course of the game plot, Karlach has absolutely threatened to rip his face off if he dares lay a finger on Rai. This may or may not become foreshadowing, haven't written/planned anything that far ahead just yet so we'll see when/if I get there hahaha. If its just a general "someTHING happened and I am upset" the default is definitely cuddles. They're both absolute cuddle fiends, esp after Karlach's touchable again. If they're not busy adventuring or helping with camp chores they are huddled on a bedroll snuggling, but this is doubly true when one of them is upset because cuddle piles fix everything. "No you may not bother her until she decides she's done, unless you want IN the cuddle pile too then go ahead". You get the idea lolol

What values do they not share? How do they reconcile those differences?

Going with Rai and Dammon for this one bc they're the first ones that came to mind when I looked at this question!

Rai's definitely a warrior/soldier at heart. Fighting comes naturally to her, whether Dammon likes it or not (and assuming that she'd had a "normal" childhood and not been scooped up by Avarice, this would still be true. Just instead she would've probably ended up a Hellrider instead of an Acolyte). It doesn't mean that he's not going to worry, or freak out, when she charges into something dangerous. Especially because Dammon is the opposite. As I said earlier, I think he can fight, he just chooses not to because he doesn't like it.

From Rai's end, it works perfectly fine. She's never expecting Dammon to come with her into battle, she knows he hates it. But Dammon does worry. He's terrified that one day she'll leave for a battle and never come back. And he won't be there, it'll be Wyll and Karlach by themselves coming back to give him the bad news. Dammon doesn't think his heart can take it. He's definitely had panic attacks before because of worrying about Rai charging off into a fight, but he's had to make peace with the fact that it's in her blood and he can't stop her. A frequent exchange between them before Rai runs right into something dangerous is usually Dammon telling her "I don't need you to be a hero, I just need you to be alive and safe" ( D: ). But he has to learn to trust her when she responds with "I promise you, I am coming back. I'm coming home to you when it's over". The more times she does come back, the more he starts to believe it even if the worry doesn't ever completely go away </3.

Rai always makes sure to "check in" with him before and after a fight as a result. Because even if it seems silly to her, she knows Dammon needs to hear her say it. (Also I think once they end up in the closed polycule with Karlach and Wyll, and knowing that they're there to watch eachothers' backs helps Dammon's anxiety be a bit less bad!)

What's different about their backgrounds? Do those differences affect the relationship?

And again bc they were the first pair I thought of after looking at the question, Rai/Wyll ✨

Rai's an orphan, with the Acolyte background because she was raised in a temple in Elturel and the closest thing to a "parent" she ever had was her Mother Superior, Avarice (who is also a Bhaalspawn a.k.a canon-divergent Durge). Even then, Avarice was not at all nurturing past the absolute bare minimum and by that I mean "don't kill the child soldier before she's been put to use in the Blood War" kind of deal. She has no memory of her biological parents whatsoever and doesn't really even know what having parents feels like.

Wyll on the other hand at least has his dad. But as a result of her childhood, Rai doesn't really…understand, the father-son dynamic that Wyll and Ulder have because she never had anything even close to that in her formative years. She's never deliberately confrontational with Ulder but it definitely takes her a LONG time to warm up to him after Wyll tells her about how he ended up pacted with Mizora as a result of what went on between him and his dad. She doesn't want to make things difficult for Wyll (on purpose) or tell him he can't have a relationship with his father. But she definitely doesn't GET it for a good long while and I think that would definitely bleed over into her relationship with Wyll until she can work through it.

(also something to be said for the Nobility/essentially a street urchin class-gap possibly? But no immediate anecdotes come to mind as of typing this. Just that I think that def creates some differences of experience for them that I'll prolly expand upon/explore more as I write more for them! :D)

Who said "I love you" first?

Aaand for this one, I'mma do all the Tav(Rai) ships again, because I think they're all equally cute and I can't just do one sorry! :D So here we goooo, in no particular order ~

Rai and Dammon: Both, pretty much. As discussed in question 10, Rai and Dammon have known eachother pretty much their entire lives. Their "I love you" was a "both of them blurted it out at exactly the same time" deal. When Zevlor recognised Rai and thus let them into the grove, and she started milling around and reconnecting with old friends/acquaintances/found family from Elturel, it takes her a little while to come across Dammon because his makeshift forge is tucked so far into the back of where the tieflings are staying. And while he's close with the other tieflings, Dammon does prefer to keep to himself so when there's a commotion at the gate he doesn't think it's his place to go sticking his nose in. It's probably something to do with a fight, and ever since Avernus he doesn't want much to do with fighting anymore (I'm also a "Dammon is an introvert" truther. And while I think he can wield a sword I feel like he very much chooses not to. Avernus fucking sucked my dudes, and I don't think he enjoys being on or around a battlefield AT ALL after getting back, though he will craft/fix weapons, armour, shields etc for his friends and family and if it called for it (like helping protect the tiefling kiddos during the grove raid, or defending Moonrise with the Tadpole squad and the Harpers) he will pick up a sword and fight if he HAS to. But he'd very much rather not if he has the choice between fighting or not.)

Eventually, she wanders to the back where his forge is and suddenly Rai is hit with a wave of recognition when she catches sight of Dammon and realizes it's him. She ends up getting his attention by calling out to her and at that point he almost burns himself dropping the weapon he'd been putting through the coals because as far as Dammon thought, Rai had died during the fuss with Elturel and he couldn't believe she was here - cue them both almost strangling eachother with hugs, a lot of tears and a very rushed out "I love you" because with the way Rai was carting around looking for a way to get un-tadpoled, they had no idea if there would be a "next time" that they saw eachother alive again and "I need you to know". ;3;

Rai and Wyll: Wyll went first here, but only just. Rai and Wyll's "I love you" was very much both of them were waiting for the other one to say it first because they were worried it was Too Soon(tm) otherwise. Wyll was the one that cracked first and Rai said it back ahem I may also have a fic for this hence why this one is so short, I don't want to spoiler y'all before I'm done w/ the oneshot and that was that.

Rai and Karlach: Rai went first, she'd known she loved Karlach for a while (I'd even make a cheesy "love at first sight" argument for these two tbh lol). Post-Engine upgrade 2, Karlach had a good cry when she realized it had worked, and as she cuddled and comforted her a little "I love you" slipped out into Karlach's hair. Karlach wasn't too far behind, it pretty much went down how it does in-game after they finally get to go to bed on that same night because I just think her getting so excited and yelling "ILOVEYOUTOO!" back at Rai is so goddamn cute that I have to keep it in there ;3; ❤️

#bg3 sort of #couple questions ask meme #mildly n/sfw #suggestive #long post #elven's bg3 headcanons #bg3 oc: tief!saarai #tiefling tav #saarai/wyll #saarai/karlach #saarai/dammon #saarai/karlach/wyll #saarai/karlach/dammon #thank you for picking very fun questions i had a blast writing these #''everyone deserves their own polycule'' truthers unite :P #i am very normal about rai and her polycule (i am physically incapable of being normal about how much i love them. Ever /hj) #also pretty sure i read somewhere that tief tails *aren't* prehensile anymore?? but they are to me so the lore can fight me lmao #also also both wyll and dammon *are* also bi because in her other verse rai's polycule is all-bi so #it makes sense to make dammon bi as well (and wyll is ofc also bi anyway in-game) #so it's not that they're het here they just *happen* to not have a vibe with eachother is all lmao #we had that convo with drunk wyll at the grove party and i couldn't stop fucking laughing #wyll. baby boy. sweetie pie. firstly she loves you *anyway* you silly (affectionate) man. #but besides that; you're complaining about bumpy/spiny dick as if that's not something that's like. if it's *not* canon for tieflings #it *should* be [nodding emphatically] #so you just got 10x as attractive between that and the horns #(actually now that i think about it... #that's prolly about the point in time that wyll realises rai has been doing the fuck-me tail *at him too* and not just at karlach #bc that was her *immediate; instantaneous* response to his complaint about the bumpy dick lmfao) #i love him so much #tw: child abuse mention

[assortedseaglass]

Υou know I was thinking about the latest chapter and I realized that you did something great that i really loved.

I think the way the letters were used was excellent! Let me explain,

In a way this is the very first time when they both in their own way resolve their fight. Previously Tom by taking the first step, clearing the air and being honest with Bess, taking to the extent that he can his responsibility for his side of the fight. And then in this chapter Bess accepts her wrongs, sees how inconsequential in a way their argument was in the grand scheme of things and forgives him, in his absence.

And precisely because he was absent and the two of them were apart I think the letters really were the best means to bring them together.

It's like Tom really is there, he is just represented by his written word. Things developed as if he was present.

First with The Letter, one might argue that it's the passionate confession of a lover. It softens Bess who is already pretty sensitive to him due to the horrible news she got. So it's completely understandable that under his coaxing and while having to face her fear and anxiety and frustration (both sexual and not) she touches herself. Because had Tom been there their reconciliation would probably (and should i might say) include them come together like that, make love,show each other how much they care and how much the other means to them in this simple but effective, tactile fashion.

And then after the high and the vitality of the sex comes the pillowtalk. Again his letter is his stand in. He is being earnest. He confesses his fears, he entrusts in her, confides in her in the safety of their own bubble. And she would need that deeper, softer connection as a way to gently close the circle their fight had started.

The letters worked magnificently. He has never been more present while being away. Has never been closer to her while at war. And also while being in England too. He did show vulnerability and i think that was the most effective and for the time being comfortable way for this to be done.

I'm dying for the moment he will learn that she got the letters. ( And as I haven't yet watched the series so idk what happens, i will literally die if a letter arrives that he has "passed away")

Excellent chapter!!! You never miss!

Woah. Taking a deep breath after reading this amazing message!

Thank you so much! It really means the world that people are so invested in these characters. I've put a lot of thought into how Bess and Tom express themselves to those around them and each other. They're both bloody difficult people whose communication is nil.

There's no point reiterating what you've summed up so well, but letters seemed the best way to get these bad communicators to tentatively reveal themselves to each other.

I just hope that the next few chapters don't disappoint you!

#answered #ewan mitchell #the seamstress & the sailor

[myretransitiondiary]

This is me when I was Joey. I know it might sound strange, but I feel as if I miss Joey like I miss a friend who just.. disappeared? Well I guess what happened was I morphed my female and male sides into one package in the body I have now. After all, most people assume I am a trans woman in the traditional sense when they meet me based off of my low voice, visible Adams apple and stubble that I shave each morning now.

In case you're confused by the photos, this is me when I was a trans man. I was a drag queen when I was a trans man, if you can't tell haha. I was doing all of this when it was not something people did. I love Joey for how brave he was and how beautiful I was as a man. Not that I am not beautiful now, but being a dashing, passing, white, gay trans man is a feeling... Makes you feel hot and famous because somehow everyone seems to know who you are even if you don't know them. Well it was like that back then in 2013 haha 🤣 idk. Point is, I loved Joey and still love him.

He will always be a big part of me. I miss him and I wish I could switch between looking as I do now, and looking like Joey. I feel very two spirit, leaning feminine. Even as a man, I was very feminine in my behaviors and attitudes.

Sometimes people ask me if I think I'll regret retransitioning later on in life. And honestly, sometimes I wonder that myself. But where I am now in life and with everything I've done and experienced, I've decided I no longer wish to take hormones to keep myself looking any certain way. I would rather go with the flow of my body and mind and express myself accordingly. That's just me by the way!! I'm not speaking for anyone else but myself and my own journey and life experience.

And tbh, if I ever decided that I wanted to transition back to being a man, I'd just do it. I don't think that we make "mistakes" transitioning, whether or not one decides to transition again afterwards. Gender has been a journey for me, not a destination. And it might always be that way for me! I'm okay with that. But currently and for the unforeseen future I am very comfortable in my transfeminine body and how I look and present.

Although the aging process is a little tedious and stressful now that I've started to notice myself aging a little in my appearance. Aging as a woman. I never pictured myself as an old woman. Aging into an old man always made more sense to me than the alternative and made me feel a lot more comfortable with aging. The fact that I will be an old woman possibly, is crazy. Never thought that would happen.

I wanted to be a boy since before I can remember. 3 or 4 probably. And that never changed until after 4 years on testosterone. I have to admit, the first reason for me stopping testosterone was convenience, because my hair was falling out fast (lol) and also I wanted to have sex as a female, which I had never done before low key high key. A big for my second transition was because of my sexuality, but honestly I just stopped... Giving a fuck about my gender and decided to stop T. That's what happened! Idk! That's all I can say without getting more intimate about my sexual history than I'm ready to say right now.

Dear Joey,

I love you so much! You are with me always, you are never gone. You will always be my dear friend.

#detransition #artists of tumblr #lgbtq #lgbt #artists on tumblr #youtube #transfeminine #trans #transgender #nonbinary

[theteasetwrites]

what's insane to me is how you get stalked and scolded over shit that other writers get so much praise for. there are literally huge communities in fandoms that are solely dedicated to intense/extremely sexual fanfic content (ex. daddy kinks and further and worse). if they think your stuff is bad, these anons wouldn't survive any other fandom's fanfic tags (I'm not kink shaming though). but when you do it, you're a bad person? i am begging for these anons to go after the people who are actual fucking creeps and using kinks to air out disturbing behavior instead of going after every mf that uses the kinks or warnings correctly and respectfully.

Right???

I have read so much stuff that can be seen as more offensive than daddy kink. I get that people have preferences. I get that a lot of people are not into the daddy thing. That's totally fine. Different strokes for different folks. The problem is acting like I'm supporting pedophilia just because I like reading/writing daddy kink. That's such a stretch and just offensive to people who have faced ACTUAL child sex abuse.

And yeah, my stuff is NOTHING compared to other stuff I've read in different fandoms. Maybe it's not as common in the Daryl/TWD community but there are HUNDREDS of fics that involve daddy kink and way more intense stuff in that area. It's not like I was writing DDLG or something, which is the roleplay thing, and that's way more controversial than what I did.

But yeah, I am suddenly a bad person for writing daddy kink (btw, I have actually written daddy kink before, so idk why this person decided NOW to get all upset about it...). I just don't understand. I can't do anything right apparently. Some people want daddy kink, some people will call me a pedophile defender for writing daddy kink, some people don't want me to sexualize Daryl at all because he's "asexual." I literally cannot win no matter what I do, so whatever.

And you're so right. Why are they coming after ME? I get that they think they're doing something good, but I am not the enemy here lmao. Oh but "women's solidarity" hmmm... yeah I think I missed the part of "women's solidarity" that says women should shame each other for expressing themselves in a harmless way, and yes, daddy kink is harmless. Daddy kink is cringey at worst, but I have written cringier things too (I am honestly still surprised no one has told me that I support bestiality because I wrote A/B/O LMAO).

Like you said, I labeled that fic appropriately. I warned people that there was daddy kink in the fic. If they aren't interested in that, they don't have to read it, and they certainly don't have to come crying to me about it.

Thank you <3

#abbi speaks

[poetsdepartment]

anyway here's my rwrb movie review that no one asked for!

it does not even come close to the amazingness that is the book. and it really comes down to three things

characters

pacing

mismatched energy

music

characters. ok there are so many characters missing! june not being around is ridiculous. so is henry's absent mom. i don't get it. and literally, raf, the backstabber responsible for the leak, doesn't exist so that this weird raf/liam hybrid can be here? every character is responsible for bringing stakes into play. not having them decreases the stakes and makes you rely on the logic of the problem instead of the way it makes you feel, killing the emotional investment, most prominently in the huge leak convo scene. And many of the characters are NOT scary enough! if i'm supposed to believe the crown is homophobic, i need someone to actually say something homophobic, just not the word "homosexual" in a wierd voice. i need to see hushed voices and people almost getting caught and disdainful glances. alex got away with too much shit and if the comedy can be that extreme, i need our character presence to bring that back to earth. henry can't be the only person doing that because then, again, we only believe him either bc we read the book or bc it makes sense, not bc we see it. showing vs. telling ppl! this is like, basic writing principle.

pacing/scale. this is probably the biggest issue. the first 30 mins of the movie cover like half of the book! also, most are really short scenes (like 1-3 mins), so there isn't time to get invested. we don't see them develop from friends to enemies or friends to lovers. and we don't see the details of alex understanding his bisexuality! this also decreases the stakes because the audience doesn't understand how deeply they know about and care for one another. when henry spits out "it feels like you don't know me" we're kinda like, yeah... bc we don't know henry, either. we needed the texts and emails to be slowed waaayyy down. what they did to accommodate them for film is cute, but it wrecked the sense of time passing, and passing time is integral to showing change and development in relationships. and a lot of this vulnerability in character DID happen during or before/after sex in the book! so cutting out sex scenes, as they did so often, really ruined the sense of how they were feeling. the sense of taking this from "i am attracted to you but have unresolved issues about my sexuality/our relationship so am using your body to express this pain" kind of sex to "i'm actually deeply in love with you" kind of sex! they kind of did it with the slowness of henry's undressing but it should have been even slower AND there should have been foreplay and blushing and lots and lots of consent. maybe candles? idk i just feel like one of the things casey mq does so well is writing sex scenes that are both awesome for representation and also necessary for plot/character development

so many moments happen in a way that distorts their emotional impact by having either strange camera focuses and/or not having enough physical acting to be believable. be it the focus of the scene (why do cameras cut to a patch of lavender while henry is opening up to bea?). and, in their big fight scene after not talking for a week, why does the camera focus so much on just henry's face? alex is the one who is confronting? and why is there a focus on quiet conflict? let them rage! in the museum scene, why is henry leading alex like a tour guide, instead of trying to be close to him? or trying to not look at alex only to fail? there isn't quite enough physical pining and use of the actors' bodies in space to help heighten emotions of the scene. they are just like, bodies roaming around. part of this is also the way voiceover is used for the text/email scenes and how quickly questions would be answered bc we'd see the answer happening in real time. more diminishing of stakes!

i feel like this is getting out of my realm of literary expertise (i'm a creative writing major), but i do feel like the choice of music was odd. WHERE WAS THAT FUCKING BILLY JOEL SONG? why did they use such a niche "i can't help falling in love with you" cover. why did we never hear henry play the piano until the very end? why didn't alex's dad play the guitar? why did we never get to hear a muffled breath over the phone? WHY DID THEY NEVER MOAN DURING SEX?? like, why is there such a lack of real, human sounds? i think one of my favorite moments was henry fumbling around the closet and singing karaoke for that reason. they were real sounds that could happen in real life. yes, the music swells in your head when you are into someone, but camera zooms can get that effect. just like, less weird pop, more sounds that are contextual to what is going on.

anyways, some moments are so golden. and many characters are played well, henry and zahra, especially. but the stakes are like completely removed bc all we see is success montages with short sad scenes. i think that part of this is that it can be hard adapting a dual-pov book into a movie bc how do you not show the context in real time? it's so tempting! but part of the impact of dual-pov is the inherent longing, miscommunication, and emotional spiraling that comes from not knowing the answers and seeing things right away! too many things were resolved too quickly.

i also think that they really glossed over alex's discovery of his bisexuality. i remember the scene where he talked about his poster of prince henry having thumbprints all over it and how he had taken these confusing seeds of bisexuality and repackaged them as idolization and rage and jealousy bc he had nothing else to call it! it was literally so relatable and so integral to my own queer awakening and to see those parts removed really took away from alex's stakes and the main message of the book. like of course henry is scared bc his family is homophobic but alex's fear couldn't be evenly represented bc his identity was realized so quickly that the doubt and embarrassment that went along with it only lasted for one sex scene and a way-too-heavy-handed-ally convo with his mom.

anyways i want to read the book now.

#rwrb #film

[starlight-shades]

tag gamerules: favorite: movie, hobby, animal, character, color, place, season, album, food

movie: I'm one of those people who doesn't have just one favorite anything. But I tend to rewatch Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron every now and then (it was def my fave for a bit when I was a kid). I used to make my dad watch it with me whenever he stayed home to watch me when I was sick.

hobby: Does drawing count when it's what I went to school for? If not, I'll go with reading. Love a good bit of escapism. I love storytelling more generally in all sorts of forms (i.e. movies, TV, games, etc), but reading was definitely what got me started. Recently I've been reading a lot of fanfiction. Last year I kept track of all the books I read and I ended up with the insane number of 534 books read.

animal: I'm a big fan of hyenas. This is another one where I don't have just one favorite, but hyenas are where I'm sitting right now. I think that they're really neat for a variety of reasons. They're matriarchal which is super cool, and they were used in medieval bestiaries as a sort of example of sexual deviance because they were believed to be hermaphroditic (they aren't, the females just have external vaginal canals that look like a penis- it makes giving birth as difficult as you think it does). I think they're a really cool example of how nature doesn't give a fuck about human ideas of how sexual dimorphism (and subsequently gender) should work. I tend to gravitate towards animals that media tends to use as shorthand for evil bc I think it's lazy and irresponsible (I also love sharks).

character: Ghost. I do too much projecting for it not to be him. I'm deep in my COD era (this is a COD blog after all). He's just this big beefy man who is deeply traumatized and has trouble trusting people and developing deep relationships. What's not to love?

color: It's maroon. It is maroon, it has been maroon, it will always be maroon. IDC that I surround myself with pastels. If it has to be one color and not a palette, it's maroon.

place: the aquarium <3. It's just so calming (when the children are not screaming, but we listen to the children scream because they're excited and it's good for them and we're an adult and can wait until they move on so we can watch the fish in the quiet). Every now and then I'll take a day in the middle of the week when school is in session to go to the aquarium or the zoo by myself. I like watching the animals, and I don't feel bad about sitting and drawing them for like 30+ minutes when there aren't any other people who's view I'm blocking.

season: spring. When it's easiest to spend time outside. It's not too hot, and if it's chilly I can throw on a sweater. I like sitting outside in the afternoon sun and reading poetry out loud. Makes me feel like a fairy.

album: star-crossed by Kacey Musgraves. That album came out around the time I had to put down my cat, and I would just listen to it on repeat and cry. It's got a very specific grief+nostalgia combo that really hits me. It's still one of my go-tos when I need a good cry. I have playlists for when I'm happy, but that album has a special place in my heart. 'if this was a movie..' and 'camera roll' are probably my favorite songs off of it.

food: this one is hardest I think. My family is Not Great at expressing feelings, so I ended up with food as a proxy for love and care. And both my parents draw from a pretty diverse set of culinary practices for various reasons, so I've inherited it. When I'm feeling homesick, I'll cook Italian. When I'm sad or missing my brothers, I'll cook Korean. When I miss my mom, I'll make Turkish. As I'm writing this, though, I'm thinking about dumplings.

TY to @soapsdish for the tag. Idk why the formatting did that.

I don't really have any other moots I know well enough to tag, but feel free to do this if you'd like!

#about me

[mermaidsirennikita]

Any recs where the heroine where reviewers on GR are like “god I couldn’t stand her she was a bitch”?

I'm pretty selective about reading GR reviews (because they annoy me... so much) but I think these have those comments for sure:

Kiss of a Demon King by Kresley Cole. Always and forever The Example. And like, does Sabine deceive and sexually torture Rydstrom? Yes. But her behavior does not top Lothaire's, and Lothaire is like, one of the most popular heroes in the series. She's also like, very confident about her appearance, and spoiled, and I imagine that affects things.

Neomi from Dark Needs at Night's Edge gets shit from IAD fans too. She's one of my favorite heroines ever; I have to think that a lot of the hate comes from her being a massive flirt who loves sex and is actually motivated to get out of the house she's trapped, tbh. Like, oh no!!! A woman being mildly self-centered!

No Good Duke Goes Unpunished by Sarah MacLean. I personally find Mara sympathetic (she fucks up, don't get me wrong, but I get why everything that happened... happened). But she's definitely MacLean's most hated heroine, mostly because she makes controversial decisions.

Melanthe from Laura Kinsale's For My Lady's Heart gets a lot of shit from readers for being cold and unfeeling... And it's like lmao dude she was given to an old guy in marriage as an actual child and targeted by a predator since then. She's political as hell and put walls up emotionally because she is so hurt. But yeah sure, I guess she's just a bitch.

I've been thinking about this book a lot lately, but Priest by Sierra Simone. I see Poppy, the heroine, being dragged down as like "shallow"--and the vast majority of the book is from the hero's POV, so that might affect things. But if you pay any attention to Poppy at all, she's got an internal life that's just as complex as Tyler's in many ways. She's also very conventionally hot, unabashedly sexual (flirts shamelessly with a Catholic priest even before he reciprocates lol), and was a stripper and didn't feel all this natural shame over it. Poppy owning her sexuality is a huge issue for readers, imo.

Similarly, a lot of readers of New Camelot are very dismissive of Greer and try to paint her as two-dimensional and whiny... compared to her two male lovers, of course, who are so deep and MUST truly just love each other, not Greer... It's both misogyny and a discomfort with the fact that a poly romance is in fact about a polyamorous triad, lol. And what I love about Greer is that she is a little frosty and removed, but her vulnerability is really revealed when she's alone with Ash and/or Embry. Like Poppy, she's very naturally sexual (and submissive) and she's not ashamed of it; she's very carnal. And she's also like, so good about expressing her emotion through sex? (The "IS HER PUSSY SWEETER THAN MINE???" rant at Embry is one of my favorite "oh wow they are really doing this" moments in a romance novel.)

I see a lot of people hating on Olivia from Olivia and the Masked Duke by Grace Callaway. Again, it's less her being a bitch and more her being a young woman who loves sex. I see a lot of "Oh, how could she be turned on by seeing the man she's into fucking another woman (before he even knows Livvy is an option for him)". Idk, because it's hot? There is soooo much kink-shaming in certain subsets of romance readership, gotta say. If it's not perfectly vanilla, they don't see it as "loving" lol.

Lol everyone hates on basically everyone outside of Valentine, the more strait-laced of the two heroes, in Alexis Hall's Something Fabulous. I think it's honestly such bullshit--like, yeah Valentine is not a bad man, but he is very closed off and self-centered in the novel's beginning. Also, it's an Alexis Hall romcom, everything is heightened and that means he has to go throoough it. Bonny is another hero, not a heroine; but he is very femme-coded in a way a lot of heroes in m/m books aren't, and it doesn't miss me that his more "straight-coded" counterpart gets a break where he doesn't. People get very uncomfortable with a lot of queer heroes in m/m romances who don't present as super masculine, or as fetishized hypertwinks. Bonny is lovely and funny and frivolous and flamboyant but he's also kinda bratty and not at all simpering.

People either act like the heroine of Sherry Thomas's Private Arrangements is a total cunt or an innocent totally wronged by her evil husband. There is no middle ground. When I'd argue that a point of the book is... middle ground.

Most Scarlett Peckham heroines get shit from readers, but especially the heroine of The Rakess (sex positive lady who has a fling with a kind single father widower architect) and The Earl I Ruined (flighty gossip who ruins the life of uptight dom earl, then decides to try to fix it).

People haaaate the heroines of Ruby Dixon's Sworn to the Shadow God (crime: being a kind of ditzy gamer girl who doesn't adjust to a parallel universe easily) and Wed to the Wild God (crime: is practical when the hero is a hedonistic airhead who needs her to think for him).

What a Rogue Desires by Caroline Linden has a heroine who grew up poor and has become a conwoman. Naturally, when she cons the rakish hero who was a total dick in the previous book, she is totally evil, I guess.

Roxanne from Lush Money by Angelina M. Lopex. Oh shit, she does all the stuff billionaire heroes do... Horrible...

Lol Florence from The Prince of Broadway by Joanna Shupe gets so much shit because she wants to run a casino and doesn't want to have babies. She's a total anachronism, apparently, all women wanted to stay home and have babies in the Gilded Age, nobody wanted otherwise.

#romance novel blogging #book recs