#Kathleen I’m giving you money making ideas

[spicycinnabun]

pt. 1 2 3 4 6 7 💐

Eddie turned around, finding none other than the flower nazi. His nametag actually said Steve. 

He had a leaf stuck in his hair, and his nose was abnormally rosy. Going by that and his nasal tone, he clearly had a cold. He sneezed, then looked annoyed at himself for doing so. “Ugh, sorry,” he apologized. 

He was fucking adorable. It made Eddie smile. “Don’t be. I don’t really need help.” Not with flowers, anyway, just with everything else about his life. “I’m only browsing.” 

It was a weird response, he realized. A guy like him, who looked like he belonged anywhere else, loitering in a shop like this. Just browsing. Right. Steve probably thought he was a creep. 

Steve was surprised to hear that the man wasn’t looking for anything. Last time, he had bought something, so Steve had assumed he was a returning customer. He had been staring at the wedding arrangement, so maybe he was trying to figure out if Harrington Floral was the best place to get them from.

“That’s some talent you’ve got,” Eddie added, pointing to the display.

Steve felt himself flush. “Thanks,” he said softly, ducking his head bashfully. It wasn’t usually guys who were doling out compliments on the displays. Typically, they just asked for his advice on what they should buy for their significant others.

The redness that bloomed on Steve’s cheeks was just plain delightful. It could have been due to his illness, but Eddie was pretty sure it was a reaction to his compliment. His smile widened. “You made it, right?”

“Yes, I did. I make all the displays.” Steve ran a hand through his hair, missing the leaf by a mere centimeter. “I think I saw you last month when I was building one in the window over there. Are you sure you’re not interested in anything?”

Instead of answering, Eddie reached out and plucked the leaf out of Steve’s hair. “Sorry, you had a little bud-dy trying to catch a ride there. Was distracting the hell out of me.” Eddie showed him the small, curvy leaf. 

Steve laughed, which made him cough a little. After clearing his throat, he got back to business. Steve was all about closing a sale, so he pushed a little. “Are you or someone you know getting married? I can, uh…” he thought quickly, “give you a free bouquet as a testimony to how well our flowers will hold up. I was just pruning the roses before you came in. What do you think about a bouquet of them?”

Steve remembered Eddie. And he’d laughed at Eddie’s horrible pun. But Eddie was caught off guard by the questions and the offering. Steve was observant. “I can’t let you do that,” he said. “My uncle is getting married. Hopefully. He hasn’t popped the question yet.”

It would be kind of terrible of him to accept free flowers if it didn’t work out and they never ordered any.

“That’s exciting,” Steve responded.

Genuinely, he felt like it was. Steve loved love. Working in a flower shop would be hard if he was bitter about being single. Also, the fact that someone else around his age wasn’t getting married made him feel a bit better about his own love life. Lately, it seemed like all his friends were getting hitched.

Eddie twirled a piece of hair around his finger, contemplating. He pocketed the little leaf. “I’m meeting the bride-to-be tonight. I suppose making a nice first impression wouldn’t be a bad idea.” He could give the flowers to Wayne to present to Kathleen when she came over. “How much for half a dozen?”

That was probably all he could afford, but he would be paying.

Eddie wasn’t selling as much anymore. Just weed, no powders or pills. Not since he’d discovered that one of his regulars had recently overdosed on Molly. He was at least partially responsible for that. He should have questioned the steadily increasing amount the guy was buying, but he had only been thinking about the money.

“Wouldn’t be a bad idea at all.” Steve had no intention of taking any money for the bouquet. 

He walked around the store and started building it. Steve picked out four roses in red and pink, then added two pastel-dyed Asiatic lilies and sprinkled in a few strands of baby’s breath.

When he was finished, he went to the counter to put them down. He grabbed the twine and unrolled some tissue paper. “I’m sure there won’t be any more customers tonight. I’m kind of in charge, so I can totally give you these for free. Because I want to.”

Eddie pressed his lips together briefly, walking over and planting his forearms on the counter. He wasn’t some charity case. He didn’t like having debts, either. Maybe Steve had seen the type of clothes he wore and automatically assumed Eddie was trailer park trash who couldn’t afford it.

But Steve was smiling at him, looking sweet as a goddamn sugar cookie, and Eddie relaxed, rejecting the thought. That just didn’t seem right.

(Though why Steve wanted to give anyone, let alone Eddie, free flowers was a mystery.)

“You’re the boss, huh?” Eddie said. Steve looked young to own the shop, but maybe he was one of the Harringtons.

The name rang a bell. Steve Harrington. Dustin used to talk about a Steve during D&D. Gushed more than talked, really. Was he the same one?

“Technically, it’s my mom’s shop, but I’ve been running it for a while now,” Steve said. He couldn’t take all the credit.

Eddie gently drummed the counter, rings click-clacking as he watched those nimble fingers cut, tie, and wrap. His mom’s store. Well, wasn’t that precious.

Steve gave the bouquet one last critical look and a fluff with his fingers before handing it over. “With these, I think you’ll make the best impression. Maybe your uncle will even pop the question tonight!” Steve was excited for the groom to be even though he didn’t know him.

Eddie accepted the bouquet and looked down at it. “Thank you. It’s stunning.” Kind of like you.

He didn’t say that last part out loud, though he thought it hard enough that he’d probably projected it into Steve’s head.

Steve felt his face heat again. He didn’t know why he was reacting this way to the compliments. When women complimented his arrangements, he barely blinked.

Eddie brought the bouquet to his nose to smell its perfume. It brought another smile to his face before he lowered it. If Kathleen didn’t end up liking them, she was crazy.

Steve watched Eddie, grinning. “I’m Steve, by the way.”

Eddie’s gaze flickered up. He lowered the bouquet. Why were they both smiling like fucking idiots? “Eddie.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Eddie. Let me get you a card—you know, in case your uncle does propose and will need flowers from somewhere.” Steve grabbed one of the embellished business cards from the stack beside the register.  

Eddie reached out to take it, and Steve sneezed again just as their fingers brushed. It was a big sneeze that made his face screw up and nearly blew him backward. Luckily, he managed to cover his nose before he bombed Eddie. Eddie tried not to laugh at his irritated expression and soft whine as he sniffled.

Eddie pocketed the card and tugged his handkerchief out at the same time. “Here,” he offered kindly, holding it out to Steve.

It was his favorite hanky, his pirate one with the skull and bones, but it was the least he could do. 

Without thinking much about it, Steve took it and blew his nose. He let out a soft sigh, feeling a little better. Then he realized what he’d done. “Sorry…this is kinda gross now. Do you want it back?” 

“Oh no—no, that’s yours now,” Eddie said hastily. “I insist. Consider it a token of my gratitude.” He lowered himself in a teasing bow. “Farewell, Steve, fine sir.”

So, so fine. Even with all the snot.

Eddie backed out of the store, still bent over for extra theatricality. When he straightened up, Steve looked confused but was red in the cheeks again. Score.

On the ride home, Eddie almost missed a turn because he kept glancing at the bouquet.

🌷🪻🌻🌹

co-writing this with @batty4steddie 💕

#fic #wybmb #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie #stranger things #steddie fic #steve x eddie #steddie au #florist au #florist!steve harrington #🌹🌹🌹🌹

[zablife]

Pink Venom

Jack Nelson x Kathleen "Kit" (OC-Jack's fiancee) x Gina Gray

Summary: Newly engaged Jack and Kathleen seem like the perfect couple until Gina arrives and begins to make trouble. Will her plan to win Kathleen work?

Author's Note: Requested by a lovely anon who wanted to see a love triangle with Jack and Gina vying for the attention of the reader. I changed it to an OC. Please note there is NO INCEST!!

Warnings: language, drinking, cheating, fighting, mention of sex

Boston, March 15, 1933

The organ player began Ave Maria once more as the guests shifted uncomfortably in their seats. The old wooden pews creaked and a few coughs could be heard amongst the wedding guests, but no one dared utter a word as they witnessed Jack’s hands curl into fists at his sides, clenching tightly until his knuckles turned white. The wedding that should have begun an hour ago was woefully late, so much so that the priest leaned into the groom asking feebly, “Perhaps someone should check on your bride, Mr. Nelson?” 

Jack gritted his teeth as he thought, Goddamn right. Where the hell is she?

———————————————————

London, October 1932

“Michael? Michael!” Gina shouted as she tugged on her calfskin gloves. She swished down the hallway quickly searching the rooms until she came to his office, noting how he didn’t bother to look up at her from his ledgers. 

“Michael I was calling you!” she said as she tapped her foot impatiently.

Michael looked up slowly with an annoyed expression asking, “What is it, Gina? I’m busy.”

“I need my allowance,” she said giving him a doe eyed stare. 

“You’ve spent three times your allotted expenditures for the month already. Why do you need more?” he asked leaning back in his chair and pinching the bridge of his nose. Her demands were becoming relentless.

“I’m going shopping with Uncle Jack’s new fiancee and I don’t want to be embarrassed. Do you want me to look like a poverty stricken charity case in front of her?” she pouted at him.

Michael knew a temper tantrum was inevitable if he let her continue so he reached into his desk for the roll of bills he kept for emergencies and counted out the maximum he was willing to part with for her frivolous shopping spree. Handing it across the desk with a huff, he held her hand tightly as he warned, “Behave yourself, Gina.”

She slid her hand away smoothly and placed the money in her purse as she smiled sweetly at him. “Don’t I always, dear?” 

—————————————————————————

“You must be Kathleen,” Gina said, leaning in for an air kiss to the woman’s cheek.

“Please, we’re about to become family. Call me, Kit,” the young woman said with a kind smile. She was not at all what Gina had expected. Although she knew her uncle liked young, attractive women she had no idea he had chosen someone this young. They were practically the same age.

“Alright, then. Kit,” Gina said pronouncing the last syllable precisely as she sized up the woman who would become her aunt. She was breathtaking, that much was true.

“Jack has told me so much about you. He says you’re missing home as much as I am. I have to admit, I’m anxious to return to Boston. I’m not sure I’ll ever get used to the weather here!” she said gesturing toward the misting rain outside the shop window.

Gina mirrored her polite smile with a noticeable lack of sincerity. She hoped the conversation would improve throughout the day. She hated small talk because it usually signaled a complete lack of imagination and a woeful shortage of gossip. Still Gina knew how to make her own fun if none were readily available and she felt the need for mischief creep up on her before she could stop herself. Not that she would have wanted to.

“Shall we have a look?” Gina said removing her gloves and taking a stroll. Kit nodded in agreement and they walked on together.

As Gina listened to Kit discuss her privileged upbringing and well-connected parents, Gina understood why her uncle was so eager to marry her. However, she doubted Kit had any idea what she was getting herself into by marrying one of Boston’s most notorious gangsters.

After hearing all about the wedding planning, Gina couldn’t stay silent any longer. “And how are you getting on with the children? Are you ready to step in as their new mother?” she asked, raising an eyebrow in Kit’s direction. 

Kit stopped short and held her breath for a moment. No one had asked her about this yet as most people thought it impolite to bring up anything regarding Jack’s status as a widower. She was glad no one had broached the topic before because she was nervous about the arrangement. The children were quite young and adorable, but no one would ever replace their own mother. 

“They’re precious children. I’m honored to become their step mother,” Kit said softly. “In time Jack and I hope to have children of our own as well,” she said looking down at the floor shyly. 

“Well, that is admirable. The children need stability after all that’s happened…watching as their mother was forced to leave them,” Gina said. Kit looked up at her with furrowed brow wondering why she’d used that wording.

“Wh- What do you mean by that?” she said.

Gina stepped closer and placed a hand on Kit’s forearm gently. “My uncle isn’t perfect, but I can see you’re going to be good for him,” she said, searching her eyes carefully. “Yes, loyal to him.” Then she broke away to walk ahead as she continued with a wave of her hand, “Aunt Maggie didn’t understand him at all. That’s why she ended up where she did.”

“Buried at St. Matthew’s?” Kit asked with a confused look.

“Is she? Well that’s a new one on me,” Gina replied, “Oh, Kit, perhaps we should have spoken sooner.”

————————————————————

Two weeks later…

“You happy to be home, doll?” Jack asked, stroking Kit’s cheek gently as he placed her suitcases inside her Boston apartment.

“Mmm-hmm,” she said. She thought back to the unpleasantness of her last weeks in London and how upset she’d been after spending time with Jack’s niece. Her face fell at the thought and Jack was quick to notice her sudden change in demeanor. 

“You still thinking about Gina’s crazy lies, huh?” he said sadly. “God, I’m so sorry she scared you like that,” he said sympathetically pulling her into his arms for a kiss. She pressed her cheek to his chest feeling the beating of his heart and the warmth of his body, wanting to believe his numerous denials. However, there was something about the way Gina had spoken to her that made her seem like far more of an authority on the matter.

“Hey, you going to be alright for the New Years Eve party?” Jack asked hooking a finger under her chin. “We’re gonna be entertaining the most important people in the city, you know. I need you, Kitty Kat,”he said smoothly leaning in for a kiss.

Kit melted into him and when she pulled away, she smiled lovingly at him. “I’ll be better than alright so long as I have you.”

“That’s my girl,” Jack said with a broad smile. 

———————————————————-

New Years Eve 1933

Kit had made her rounds on Jack’s arm, greeting the endless stream of party guests. She’d chatted merrily with all of them until she spotted Gina enter the room. Pulling herself closer into Jack’s side she whispered, “Jack, darling, you didn’t tell me your niece would be here.”

“Michael had business in New York and Gina phoned yesterday to see if she’d be welcome for a visit. I didn’t have the heart to tell her no,” he said. “It’s not a problem is it?”

Not wanting to ruin the mood of the party, Kit replied, “Of course, she’s welcome.”

The night wore on without incident. Gina found plenty of people to entertain her and Kit soon found herself unaware she was even in attendance until a few minutes after midnight. Stepping out onto the balcony, she found a somber Gina smoking lazily. She appeared to have been crying, but she still looked as beautiful as ever, barely a hair out of place as she stood regally in her gold satin gown. 

“Gina, is something the matter?” Kit asked, approaching carefully. She couldn’t stand the sight of someone in tears, even if it was a person who had hurt her feelings not so long ago.

Gina shook her head softly, exhaling a stream of smoke into the night air.

“Please talk to me. Do you miss Michael?” Kit ventured again, unwillingly to leave when she feared something important may have happened.

Gina scoffed as she extinguished her cigarette beneath the heel of her shoe. “How can I miss a man who’s never around?”

“Jack said he had business in New York. I assume it must be urgent if he had to work over the holidays,” Kit said trying to be diplomatic.

“There’s always something more important. The business, his family, every fucking thing before me,” Gina said bitterly as she wiped a tear from the corner of her eye.

Kit looked away unsure of how to comfort her. “Well, tonight you’re with Jack and me so we’ll look after you. We’re very glad you came,” Kit offered, trying to think of some way to cheer her up.

Gina looked at Kit hopefully and walked toward her, stumbling a bit as she made her way over. She must have had too much champagne, Kit thought. Gina grabbed onto Kit’s arm and Kit held her steady. 

“You can’t imagine how lonely I am, can you? No one to kiss on New Year’s Eve.” She looked up into Kit’s enormous blue eyes and asked “Will you kiss me?” 

Then she leaned in and placed a soft kiss to her lips, delicate at first and then lingering in its warmth as she pushed her chest into Kit’s arm. Kit’s breath caught in her throat as she felt her pulse race at the contact. Then she stood frozen as Gina broke away, smiling dreamily as she ambled back inside as though nothing had happened.

———————————————————

One week later…

Kit lingered outside Jack’s office, waiting for him to end an important call before venturing inside with the question that had been running through her mind since the party. When would she see Gina again? Pushing the heavy door aside, she crossed to Jack’s desk hesitantly.

“Jack, darling, I was wondering if you could tell me if Gina will be joining us for dinner this evening?” she asked trying to sound as casual as possible. 

Jack barely looked up from his desk, shaking his head. “Um…no, not tonight,” he replied, distracted by the note he was making on a pad by the phone.

“That’s a pity,” she said to herself, but loudly enough Jack heard.

Looking up at her quizzically, he knitted his brow asking, “Why is that, sweetheart? You best friends with Gina now?”

Her heart thundered in her chest, wondering if he’d seen their kiss on the balcony. Thinking quickly she stammered out an overzealous response. “You said we should be kind to her, that’s all. And I don’t want another surprise appearance. I have to have time to do the shopping you know!”

Jack broke into a wide grin as he stood and took her into his arms. He kissed her gently and tilted her chin up toward him. “Want to be the perfect little wife for me don’t you, doll?”

She nodded in silent agreement and straightened his tie dutifully. Stepping back toward his desk he searched through a stack of papers adding, “Don’t worry, Michael’s back in town and he’ll keep Gina out of our hair. I know you want to focus on planning the wedding.” He gave her a wink and she smiled back at him. 

“I have to get to a meeting. That guest list you wanted me to make is here somewhere in this mess. Can you find it for me, Kitty Kat?” he pleaded, looking down at his watch.

“Sure, Jack,” she said, returning the quick kiss he delivered on his way out the door. She sighed as she listened to his footsteps thudding down the stairs, her heart rate returning to normal with the diminishing sound.

Collapsing into his chair, she began her task of sorting through the mountain of paperwork in front of her. She chuckled at his disorganization wondering how he found anything in such disarray. It took nearly twenty minutes to find the list Jack had asked her to find, written in his elegant, but cramped handwriting. Just as she was tidying the last of his papers, an open ledger caught her eye and as she read, the contents made her eyes go wide.

—————————————————-

Two days later…

Gina waited patiently for the quiet sobs on the other end of the line to die down. “Kit? What’s happened?” she asked.

“He denied it, but it’s exactly as you said, Gina. I found the accounting books in his study,” Kit explained, twisting the telephone cord in her fingers until the wire cut the circulation painfully. She hadn’t been spying on Jack. It had been an honest mistake, looking through his papers to find the guest list for the wedding. He had invited her to do so. He must have left the book open thinking she wouldn’t understand the meaning of his notes, but she had connected the dots.

“It was all there. The money he’s been sending to Palm Beach to keep his wife Maggie away. I feel like a fool,” Kit said. 

Gina sat at her desk, pursing her lips. She hadn’t wanted to hurt Kit, but she deserved to know the truth and now she had it. However, she sensed there was more and she waited as Kit continued.

“He’s got other accounts as well for two more women. Did you know about them?” she said sniffling.

Gina bit her tongue, unsure how to answer. Her uncle had always been a womanizer so it didn’t surprise her to learn he had mistresses. It seemed unfair for him to be cheating on Kit already, especially because she was such a perfect bride. However, quality never mattered. It was quantity Jack was after. He had to be loved and admired by as many women as possible. His ego practically demanded it. 

“Kit, it’s not a good idea for you to be alone right now. You’ve had a shock. Why don’t you come over and we’ll talk,” Gina said tracing a pattern on her desk with her fingertip. 

————————————————————

February 1933

“You going out with Gina again today, sweetheart?” Jack asked, coming to stand behind Kit as she applied her makeup at the vanity. 

“Yes, she’s helping me at the final dress fitting,” Kit replied with a sweet, yet insincere smile.

Jack massaged her shoulders with his large hands, attempting to dislodge the visible tension she held in her neck. “You’re so tense, sweetheart,” he remarked. “You nervous about the wedding stuff?”

Kit’s eyes flicked up to meet Jack’s in the mirror and she simply hummed in agreement. 

“Well, don’t be. I’ve got plenty of people to help you out, ok? I don’t want you to worry about a thing,” he said placing a kiss to the spot below her ear where he knew she was ticklish. She reacted instantly, swatting him away with her freshly manicured hand. 

“Jack, I’ll be late,” she whispered, ducking here head. And he breathed a heavy sigh, frustrated by their lack of intimacy recently. He assumed it was the stress of their impending nuptials, but it was far more.

The thought of him touching her in that exact spot brought back memories of the day she had visited Gina. She’d been overwrought, accepting one too many drinks as they discussed what she should do about her fiance. Gina sat beside her on the sofa, listening sympathetically as Kit explained all the reasons why she couldn’t call off her wedding to Jack.

Gina leaned forward to emphasize her point, “You don’t have to do this, Kit.”

“Do what?”

“Make everyone happy when you’re miserable. Jack isn’t worth it. Think about what you want for a change.”

“I want someone to love me the way I love,” Kit said and her face was so hopeful and naive, Gina couldn’t help but stare.

Gina stroked Kit’s knee in slow, soothing circles. “That’s all I wanted when I married Michael, but he let me down too. Men aren’t capable of kindness or devotion.”

Kit’s hand began to shake as she placed it over Gina’s. It wasn’t fear, but anger that rose in her throat next. “Gina, how can they get away with treating us this way? How will we recover?”

The lamplight sparked the gold fleck’s in Gina’s hazel eyes as she replied with steely determination, “Because we’re stronger than they are. And what they’ve done is nothing compared to what we’re capable of,” she said clasping hands with Kit.

Kit looked confused, shaking her head she lamented, “I doubt anything I did would make Jack feel my pain.”

Gina smirked as she leaned toward Kit, placing her lips at the shell of her ear and whispering, “I’ll tell you a little secret, Kit. It’s not about pain, it’s about power. They’ve hurt us, but not like we’re going to hurt them,” placing a featherlight kiss just below Kit’s earlobe. 

Kit’s breath hitched at Gina’s words. They made her feel in control of her life again and she was intoxicated by the feeling. Turning her head toward Gina, she captured her lips in a desperate kiss, lacing a hand through her platinum bob and pulling her impossibly closer.

——————————————————

March 15, 1933

Jack stalked to the back of the church with all the guests watching and whispering behind him as he went. His ears burned in embarrassment as he attempted to hold his composure and failed.

Anxious to find the cause of the delay, he pushed the heavy doors at the back of the chapel harshly, squinting as they opened onto the brightness of the midday sun. He held a hand over his eyes, searching for his bride, but found the street in front of St. Stephen’s empty. Jack shoved his hands in his pockets and paced as he thought.

At that moment the doors opened once more and Michael came barreling toward him, shaking a small piece of paper under his nose. “Thieving American bastard!” he hissed. “You and your niece planned this all along to take everything from me!” He threw a punch, but it didn’t connect as Jack ducked in the nick of time. As Jack stood to straighten himself, Michael pulled at his lapels and tried to push Jack into the brick facade of the church front, but Jack overpowered him, turning the tables and pinning him to the wall.

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Jack demanded to know, curling a hand over Michael’s throat.

Michael lifted the letter to Jack’s eye level, crushing the note with his fist and Jack snatched it away quickly. He threw Michael unceremoniously onto his ass in the church yard as he skimmed the contents, his breath coming in short gasps as he realized the gravity of the situation. 

Michael,

By the time you read this, I’ll be on board a luxurious ocean liner far away from you and your bullshit. There’s no point in looking for me or the fortune you’ll certainly find missing when the markets open on Monday. Don’t bother asking why, you know why. You’ve been a terrible husband to me and now it’s time for you to pay the price. If you’re thinking of revenge, which I’m sure you are, know that your cousin Tommy won’t be helping you. Now that your mother is gone, he holds no further loyalty to you. In fact, I’ve told him all about your dealings with the Billy Boys so I’d recommend going into hiding yourself.

P.S.-Tell the jilted groom to check his breast pocket. Then he'll know I stole his bride. By the way, we’re fucking.

“What the fuck?” Jack exclaimed through clenched teeth and dug into his jacket, producing another small note which had gone unnoticed until now. He read it with Michael looking over his shoulder at a distance.

Jack,

You’ve hurt me more than you could possibly know, lying to me and the children about your wife’s death and keeping whores behind my back. I don’t know how you could do that to someone you care for. Gina has taught me what it is to be truly loved and I’m going away to make a life with her. She warned me that you might try to threaten me. Well I won’t be bullied into submission any longer. If you try to find me, I’ll tell everyone the truth about Maggie's whereabouts and your attempted bigamy. You'll find the safe in the house is empty of all the cash and jewelry as a parting gift I feel I deserve and I’ve also taken the incriminating ledgers to keep you honest. Your business partners would likely agree that you have some trouble in that department. 

Yours unfaithfully,

Kit

“Is this some kind of sick joke? Did you put her up to this to make me a laughing stock?” Jack asked, feeling the bile rise in his throat.

“Your niece just stole an untold amount of money from me and threatened to have my own family execute me and you think this was my plan?” Michael asked, stumbling backwards to take a seat on the church step.

Jack ran a hand down his face, feeling the blood drain away. “I always knew Gina was rotten, but to go and do a thing like this,” he muttered to himself. Then he turned to Michael in anger, “You couldn’t control her for one goddamn minute and she goes and ruins both our lives?”

Michael pointed a finger at Jack spitefully, “If you hadn’t wanted to fuck everything that moves, your fiancée wouldn’t have come crying to my wife! You arrogant prick!” At that, Jack’s shoulders started to shake with involuntary laughter, a response to the stressful situation at hand. 

“Are you fucking laughing?” Michael asked, face contorted in disgust. 

“They really got us by the balls, huh?” Jack said in disbelief, shaking his head. He joined Michael on the step and dropped his head into his hands. The two men sat next to each other in stunned silence for some time, wondering how two dames had managed to steal their money and their reputations out from under them. Meanwhile, Gina and Kit stood on the deck of the SS Monroe, toasting their newfound happiness.

-------------------------

Tag list:

@peakyswritings

@evita-shelby

@tommydoesntpayforsuits

@shelbydelrey

@alanadetigy

@wandawiccan60   

@easilyobessedbutflighty

@severewobblerlightdragon

@lovemissyhoneybee

@theshelbyslimited

@kittycatcait219

@peakyrogers

@christinasyellowflowers

@retromafia

@notyour-valentine

@theshelbyclan

@raincoffeeandfandoms

@dreamlandcreations

@jackiekae

@daddyjack-nelson

@peaky-cillian

@kpopgirlbtssvt

@floraroselaughter

@renderedspeechless

@slytherisstuff

@watercolorskyy

@cillmequick

@l1-l4

@moral-terpitude

#Peaky Blinders fanfic #Peaky Blinders imagine #Jack Nelson fanfic #Jack Nelson imagine #Jack Nelson x OC #Gina Gray x fanfic #Gina Gray x imagine #Gina Gray x OC

[moregaythanyourealized]

First Impressions

Otto Octavius x reader

Working with others wasn’t your strong suit. People think you’re vulgar and rude. You like to call yourself brutally honest. This job wasn’t an exception. A science company that needed engineers, mechanics, and strong minds like your own. You had only been working here for a few months when gossip about a new super project was being passed around. No one bothered to tell you, of course. You just overheard it on your coffee break. Apparently some great scientist was coming in and taking over the entire lab.

Usually you’d be excited for an advancement in the world of fusion. But this new rich snobby scientist meant that for however long this project took you’d have; No office, Less working hours (meaning less pay), and worst of all....small talk

It was the day the new scientist was supposed to come in, you now knew his name was Otto Octavius. Your desk and your co workers desks were moved out of the lab and into a much smaller space. Cramping you all together like rats. You wore your usual attire and annoyed look as you entered the building. Although today you dawned some stylish eyeliner. Not for him of course, everybody was working extra hard to look presentable and professional. You passed by a co-worker who you didn’t really hate as much,

“Yo, Kathleen, is that guy here yet? Or do you think he’s too busy getting the windows on his lamborghini re-tinted?” You snorted at your own joke waiting for her response,

“Uh, he’s upstairs I think...in the lab.” You thanked her and walked up the steps. You pushed through nerds and geeks trying to reach your desk. A folder of your ideas carefully sealed with colorful clips sat in your drawer.

“L/n!” Turning around your boss was at the end of the hall stomping his feet,

“You were supposed to be in the lab by 7:30!” You glanced at the clock on the wall, 7:46,

“My apologies sir. I didn’t realize everyone would have a stick up their ass this morning. Besides traffic on the way here is always shitty.” You absentmindedly looked through your folder and took one page out pinning it to your cork board, until your boss grabbed your wrist and turned you towards him. His breath was heinous,

“Listen L/n, on a normal day I’d let you get away with being like this. But this is too important for you to fuck up.” glaring at you he released your arm,

“Get your shit together.” He spat. Waiting until he rounded the corner you groaned and tugged at your hair. Today just wasn’t your day. Taking a deep breath you smoothed out your shirt and walked to the lab pushing the door open and continuing inside. The colder air made you relax a bit. Hoping you’d be able to get some work done you sat down on a metal table in the corner. Crossing your legs and looking over blueprints for the next big thing in New York. The above ground bullet train. Sleek design and smooth riding on the rails...you hoped.

Kathleen walked in and shyly rapped your shoulder,

“Did you meet Mr Octavius?”

“He hasn’t come in yet.” You replied glancing her way, admiring how nice she looked even when she wasn’t trying,

“He’s right over there.” She points to a hunched over man in a red sweater. You got off the table and stared,

“That’s him? I thought he was like a janitor or some shit.” The man looked up raising a brow.

Fuck...probably said that too loud.

Waving awkwardly you grabbed Kathleen’s arm and dragged her over to the main table with you,

“Hello, I’m Dr Octavius. I believe we’ll be working together for the next few weeks.” He smiled sweetly and stuck out his hand which Kathleen accepted greatly,

“Actually Dr,” You chimed,

“You’ll be working with people from the east wing. They’re just letting you invade our entire office.” Kathleen stamped down on your foot lightly before turning back to the doctor,

“Y/n was just going to get me some coffee, do you want any Dr?” He nodded and you walked out making sure to slam the door. Stupid jerk, wearing a cute fucking sweater, trying to act all innocent. Trying to play god and mess with whatever sanity I have left. Pouring two cups of coffee you sighed, watching the steam spiral from the cup in a calming manner. Putting milk and sugar into one and nothing into the other.

Re-entering the lab Kathleen was no longer there. A disturbing silence made you want to turn on your radio. Octavius was still leaning over the desk writing things down. You held the drink infront of him,

“Oh, thank you sweetheart.” Your eye twitched. That was the final straw. You yanked the coffee back spilling it a bit,

“My name is Y/n L/n, I may not have your money or title but I expect the same respect you’d give any man on this team. Do you understand me?” He stood up quickly. You didn’t realize he was so tall,

“Now wait a moment Y/n, just a few minutes ago you were cursing and accusing me. Respect is about the last thing on my mind when I think of you.” Ah shit, he was kinda right. You weren’t mad at him. You were just mad at the world. Still you had bad energy in your system,

“But I apologize for calling you sweetheart. It was a crude mistake.” You set both coffees down gently and folded your arms looking at your boots. Saying sorry was the right thing to do, even if it sucked,

“I’m sorry for the way I acted Dr, I guess I’m just a little upset with the pay cuts.” He paused,

“They’re cutting your pay?” You nodded and sat down in one of the metal chairs,

“Everyone here who doesn’t work 24/7 alongside you for the next month gets their pay cut in half until you’re out of here.”

“But you didn’t choose to work less, that doesn’t seem right.” You sighed and rested your head on the table,

“Tell me about it.” While enjoying the feeling of cool table on your cheek you noticed one of his papers. You grabbed it and a pencil before erasing some of his math. You could feel him focused on you,

“Staring is rude.” You said not taking your eyes off the equations,

“You seem to be as well.” Chuckling a bit he sat down and tapped your hand drawing your attention to his soft features,

“I think I know what’s bothering you.”

“I already told you what’s bothering me.” He shook his head and clicked his tongue,

“No, not that. When you left for coffee, Kathleen and I had a small talk about your behavior” Jesus, he sounds like a high school principal,

“She told me that you act like this a lot around other people. And it’s my personal hypothesis that you are intimidated by others who you believe to be smarter or better. You’re afraid of losing your job and not being able to prove yourself. I’m assuming that started in your childhood, either with an absent father figure or bullies at school.” You sat in disbelief. No one had ever really laid out your problems and made them seem so simple. Your face heated up and you clenched your hands. Why did this make you feel so stupid? Why did he think he knew more about your feelings than you did?

Standing up you turned away. Once a demanding and harsh voice was now quiet and small failing to hide your distraught,

“I don’t want to talk about this anymore.”

————————————————

The rest of the day was slow. Your desk felt like a prison where time never moved forward. Rethinking what he said. The repeated movie in your brain of him lecturing you, All of it slowly morphed into him not making noise at all. His mouth moved but no sound, it was wonderful. You just imagined him, dark eyes, large stature looming over you, soft hands....

“Y/n?”

“Fuck!” You hit your head against the wall and turned to see Kathleen. She leaned in to make sure you’re okay, her perfume hit your nose and you tried not to seem like you were enjoying the moment too much,

“What do you need Kathy?”

“Dr Octavius asked me to give this to you.” She handed you an envelope and hastily exited the room. The crisp paper unfolded in your hands. Reading the letter was like fiery kisses to your skin. Words pouring out like water from a faucet.

Y/n,

We obviously got off on the wrong foot. I do not think of you as a subordinate and I certainly hope you do not think of me as a threat. We both overstepped personal and professional boundaries today. I apologize sincerely for making you uncomfortable. What is science if not testing the waters though? To show my attitude towards a better future working together I invite you to lunch tomorrow downtown. I will pick you up outside at 12:30

All the best,

Dr Otto Octavius

Pinning the letter up next to your project on the cork board you admired it smiling. Perhaps second impressions will set you both straight.

#doc ock x reader #doc ock #mcu x reader #spiderman #spiderverse #otto octavius #tw swearing

[mst3kproject]

The Flame Barrier

I’ve got an awful lot of movies from 1958 on my resume, don’t I?  Why is that? Honestly, I couldn’t tell you. Apparently it was just a bumper year for cheap, crappy black-and-white films.  This one stars Kathleen Crowley from The Rebel Set and Rodd Redwing from The Mole People, in a movie written by George Worthing Yates, who also penned Earth vs the Spider.  Also featuring a blob from outer space, with motives even less clear than the one in The Space Children.

Over yet another stock-footage rocket launch, one of those deep-voiced 50’s narrators informs us that there’s a layer of Earth’s atmosphere called the Flame Barrier which destroys everything it touches. This particular rocket was no exception, and its crash-landing in the Mexican jungle may be related to the disappearance of explorer Howard Dalman, whose wife Carol has now come looking for him. She seeks out a pair of prospectors, Dave and Matt Hollister, to guide her to his last known location.  As they go deeper into the bush, they find they’re wandering into something unknown… something that can make men burst into flames!

This movie isn’t terrible.  It’s not great, but it’s not irredeemably awful.  It reminds me a lot of The Giant Gila Monster, in that there’s a story going on and it’s not a bad story per se, but it’s one that’s got nothing whatsoever to do with the title and premise that drew us to the film in the first place.  When the supposed main plot pops up again at the end, it makes for a sudden and jarring shift.

The Flame Barrier starts off all right.  We have the inevitable narrator to give us the backstory, and then it gets right on with meeting the characters.  They’re introduced one by one, telling us their personalities and goals: Carol is naïve and spoiled but she’s trying her best, Matt is a drunk fool but he’s got a good heart, and Dave is a gruff, cynical realist who loves his brother but is tired of his bullshit.  None of them are exactly nice people but you can see where they’re coming from, and they each get an arc.  Carol struggles with whether she really loved Howard, whom she barely knew, and the movie allows her to toughen up and learn how to survive in the wilderness. Dave spends much of the movie being a jerk to Carol but eventually realizes he judged her too harshly and apologizes.  Matt gets a chance to be a hero and takes it, believing that he owes it to Dave for never giving up on him.  The writing is frequently unsubtle but the actors are competent, and these little stories work just fine.

The movie that surrounds them, however, is often very sloppy.  The narrator tells us that the space probe from the opening crashed because ‘it unexpectedly lost its gravitational force’.  What?  What is that supposed to even mean?  The narrator also tells us it’s been six months since Howard disappeared, then mere minutes later Carol says it’s been four. There’s a bit where Carol is menaced by an iguana… the creature is never actually in the shot with her, so they couldn’t find anything scarier?  The stock wildlife footage on their trek through the soundstage sets of Central America includes hyenas.  I can hear Crow saying, “boy, are we in Afri… wait a minute…”  And, pet peeve, they describe a snake as poisonous instead of venomous.

This being a jungle movie, obviously there are ‘natives’.  I think most of these are actual Mexicans, although Wikipedia says Rodd Redwing may have been from India (if so, I like to think his entire career in Westerns was based on just walking into casting directors’ offices and announcing he was ‘an Indian’, and letting them draw their own conclusions).  Being as this is a movie from the fifties, the natives are there largely to provide a body count – white people aren’t allowed to die until the climax.  To its credit, The Flame Barrier mostly (though not entirely) avoids the trope where the natives have interpreted the mysterious happenings as supernatural, leading the white characters to scoff at the whole thing.  There is some of this, but Dave clearly knows these people well and respects their culture and their warnings.

Then there’s the love story.  Obviously this is a movie, so Carol’s gotta fall for one or other of these idiots, but neither of the Hollister brothers is a good choice. Matt is sweet to her but he’s also a useless drunk who only has a job because his brother puts up with him.  Dave spends eighty percent of the movie being an asshole and I have no idea what Carol sees in him.  At least the two men never fight over her.  I guess the love affair is important to the plot, because it spurs the party on to finish their search for the missing Howard Dalman despite the odds being stacked against them… but that basically boils down to Carol and Dave needing to be sure she’s a widow before they can bone.

After all this messing around in the jungle, with the run time half over we get to the plot, and the movie changes gears with an almost audible ka-chunk.  Now we’ve got this space blob sitting in a cave (how did it get in there when it’s still attached to the rocket?) doubling in size every two hours, which must be destroyed before it can consume the entire earth!  Suddenly we have a laboratory, because all the scientific equipment Howard brought with him is still in perfect condition despite having been sitting in the jungle for either four or six months.  Suddenly Dave the rugged survivalist is a scientist and mathematician.  It’s like they took the same actors and sets and started trying to make a totally different movie.

Honestly, I think this is more or less what happened. I think the multiplying space blob was the movie somebody originally wanted to make – it starts out as a tiny thing in a test tube, growing bigger and bigger until it consumes the whole building and will destroy the entire city if it isn’t stopped!  That sounds like a pretty fun 50’s sci-fi movie in itself. It also, however, sounds like an expensive 50’s sci-fi movie, needing miniatures destroyed and screaming extras and other stuff The Flame Barrier just didn’t have the money for. Hence the need to spend so much time wandering around in the jungle swapping tragic backstories before the characters are allowed to get to that point.

The unfortunate thing about this is that the movie doesn’t really have time to get into the nature of its alien.  In Spacemaster X-7, the Blood Rust was offscreen much of the time but we still had a good idea of what it was and of its capabilities, and the explanations we were given made a reasonable amount of sense.  In The Flame Barrier, we’ve got this blob that apparently lives in the rarified and super-hot outer atmosphere (the writers seem to have confused Earth’s atmosphere with the Sun’s corona), but can also survive on the ground… and its effects are all over the place. Sometimes when things get too close to it, they’re just electrocuted and disintegrated, as happens to the rocket’s original passenger, a very young chimpanzee.  Sometimes people get horribly burned and then burst into flames and are reduced to skeletons hours or days later, as keeps happening to the natives. And then there’s Howard, who somehow managed to get close enough to be swallowed up by the thing and his corpse is still completely intact inside it.

None of this makes any sense.  If the blob has that protective electrocution barrier that the humans must be so careful to avoid, how did Howard get close enough to be trapped in it?  How did the chimp get out to end up wandering around in the jungle?  What the heck is happening to the natives who get burned and then skeletonized and why doesn’t that ever happen to the chimp or any of the main characters?  And how do they manage to kill by electrocution a creature that uses lethal amounts of electricity without any harm to itself?  ‘It’s an alien – we don’t understand it’ can cover a multitude of sins in movie writing, but the blob’s random effects don’t even feel like they could potentially make sense.

The Flame Barrier reminds me of other MST3K movies, too. Prominent among them are It Conquered the World and The Crawling Hand, both of which ended on the same unintentionally depressing note: they suggest that the dangers of going into space are so great that humans will never be able to overcome them.  It Conquered the World tells us that there are eight more Venusians just waiting for their own turn to invade.  The Crawling Hand says that exposure to outer space causes mutations that will turn astronauts into mindless murderers.  The Flame Barrier posits that not only is space itself deadly, but is also full of deadly creatures, and the only way to avoid them is to stay on the ground.

This has always interested me because movies like this stand alongside things like the tales of Rocky Jones, Space Ranger!, in which humans have an exciting future among the stars. Stories set in space can be about either the exhilaration of discovery or the terror of the unknown, and this dichotomy seems to be as old as science fiction – Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein is considered the first work of proper sci-fi, and it encompasses both.  Frankenstein tells us that if we let our fear over-rule our curiosity, we’ll miss out on something potentially wonderful.  Movies like The Flame Barrier, and even modern space monster flicks like Alien, seem to say the opposite, that we shouldn’t meddle with the unknown at all.

This movie was kind of a compromise on my part.  I’ve had a lot on my plate lately and I picked The Flame Barrier as a movie that was kinda stupid but wouldn’t be either a test of my endurance or particularly challenging to write about.  I’m hoping to have something a little juicier for you next time.

#mst3k #reviews #episodes that never were #the flame barrier #boy are we in africa! #50s #we're running out of plots

[myhockeyworld87]

Choices - Tyler Seguin/Jamie Benn - Part 29

Word Count: 2,259

POV: Reader

Warning: Language

Notes: Back by no one’s demand...haha I’m not sure if anyone wants this back or not, but I promised I’d end it so here we go. There will only be a couple chapters left. As always, you’ll have 48 hours to vote, you can vote by commenting or sending it in on anon. Voting will close at 8pm EST on July 2nd. Happy Reading!

Choices Masterlist

You sat in Tara's kitchen just looking around. It was an open concept, so it gave you a view into her dining and living room as well. Her place, wasn't lavish by any means, not like Tyler's or Jamie's, but it did speak of someone that was well off or at least scamming enough money off of people to buy nice things. The place was neat and meticulous, nothing was out of place; which seemed odd for someone with a one and half-year-old. There should be toys lying around and a baby gate on the stairs, yet none of those things seemed to be anywhere.

 What was interesting, was that the prosthetic maternity belly she'd had on the other day lying on one of the dining room chairs. "What do you have that for?" You blurted out before you could even think of what you were saying.

 "Um…oh…I don't know what you mean. Do you need water or something? Should I call an ambulance?"

 Oh shit, you forgot you were supposed to be in pain. "Oooo," you moaned slightly. "I feel like it's getting a little better resting, and you know focusing on other things. Which is why I'm trying to figure out about that baby belly." You groaned again, hoping she would answer and help take your mind off of things.

 "Oh…um…that old thing. You see…I wanted to be an actress…Yeah, that's it." She said basically giving away that she was making this up as she went. "I had this role a long time ago, that I needed for it, and well…now a friend wants to borrow it. So I have it out for her."

 It would've been a plausible excuse had you not already seen her scamming that man the other day or the fact that she'd stammered her way through that excuse. You also had to wonder if the 'friend' was Kathleen. "Oh wow, being a mom must have really put a damper on things."

 "Yeah, it's really set my career back." She rattled off more easily this time as she settled into the lie. "There's just no time you know."

 You really weren't sure if she was asking or not. "I get where you're coming from. I have no idea how I'm going to do it. You know with leaving Tyler and all." She nodded, so you continued. "Like how do you keep this place spotless? I really need to know your secret. My place is a mess since I haven't felt like unpacking. I can't imagine what it'll be like with the babies."

 "Oh…well…you just have to do it when you can." She paused when you cocked your head to the side looking for more of an explanation. "I'm just a really active person I guess."

 You knitted your brows together because no mother was that active to have all her baby's stuff put away. Tara had given you enough information. Granted, you had no physical evidence but it was enough to go to Tyler with your suspicions. "I wish I had your stamina." You got up then. "Thanks for letting me sit down; I really think I just overdid it. I feel much better. I won't trouble you anymore. I know you were on your way out."

 "Oh, it was no bother. I'm glad your feeling better." She walked you out to the door, following you out.

 "So, I guess I'll see you around the neighborhood sometime then?"

 "Oh…uh yeah. I'm sure we will."

 The two of you walked to the end of the drive. "Thanks again. Maybe we can exchange numbers and get together. I'd love to meet Christopher sometime. You know get some real baby experience. It's been a while."

 "Yeah, next time I see you." She said opening the car and getting in. "I'm really late right now." You moved out of the way as she backed out of the drive and waved goodbye. You rolled your eyes as you made your way back to your vehicle which was parked out of sight. You knew she'd never exchange numbers with you, mainly because there was no Christopher to meet.

 By the time you got to the car, you knew that you had to tell Tyler what was going on, but you also knew that Jamie would be upset with you for doing it. You hated that the thought crossed your mind, but you knew that you had to meet Tyler without Jamie knowing. The problem was how. Jamie was practically attached to your hip when he was home and after being on the road this long you assumed it was going to be worse. The only thing you could do was head to Tyler's house and wait for him to get home.

 You shot a quick text off to Jamie, saying that you were out doing some shopping for the baby and would be home shortly; then you headed over to wait for Tyler. You parked in the driveway, just scrolling through emails when one caught your eye. It was from the paternity testing site that you'd used. You didn't have time to open it though, for Tyler's car pulled in beside you. He glared over at you through the window, before you both got out. "What are you doing here (Y/N)? I thought you never wanted to see me again."

 "We have to talk Tyler."

 "Apparently, we'll be doing that through our lawyers from now on." He slammed the car door shut with such force it made you jump.

 "Look this isn't about us." He started to walk away, so you blurted out. "It's about Christopher." That made him stop.

 "How do you…I mean…what…" He gave up then, you could see it on his face. "You better come in."

 You trailed him inside. The dogs greeting you like they hadn't seen you in months instead of days. Though you wanted to give them love and attention, now was not the time. Tyler reached into the fridge and grabbed a beer, cracking it open and taking a long swig out of it. "Do you want anything?"

 "Just a bottle of water please." You took a seat at the island like you had so many times.

 "So how do you know about him?" It was a simple question yet such a complex answer.

 "Remember when I said that the first sonogram was canceled." He nodded. "Well, I lied."

 "Jesus, (Y/N), you were shutting me out way back then?"

 "It's not like that. I hadn't planned on it, but I saw you in the parking lot with Tara and I recognized her." He winced, yet you could see him understanding why you'd cut him out of the appointment. "Once you left, I ran to talk to her. She told me that she'd had your child and you paid her to keep quiet."

 "Listen, I can explain."

 "No Tyler there's more, let me finish." He stayed mum then. "I was hurt and angry, and if I'm being honest; I still am, but we can deal with that later." The questioning glance he shot you made you keep going. "Other things started to not add up. I saw Tara with Kathleen, and then I ran into them at the coffee shop." You could see the news that the two knew each other, was something he didn't know. "Something they said, it just didn't sit right with me." This was the part you knew he wasn't going to like. "So while you were gone, I broke into your place." You ducked your head kind of sheepishly at your actions and waited for him to yell at you.

 He didn't. "Look (Y/N), I don't care that you were here. This place was always meant to be ours, but I have a feeling there's more than just that."

 "Oh, there is." You added quickly changing the subject back to the matter at hand. "I found the paternity papers. You know the ones Tara gave you and the ones Kathleen blackmailed you with."

 "You mean in the safe?" He was mad now, but you had a feeling it was more about the engagement ring that was in there and not you breaking in to find the documents.

 "Um…yeah. But look, Ty, the papers don't match." You pulled out your phone and brought up the photos. "There's a slight difference. See right here the fonts are off." He peered at the pictures, squinting in an effort to notice the subtle difference. "And here, the address is misspelled. I know it's hard to tell flipping back and forth, but if you put them side by side." He took off down the hall to his bedroom and you followed. It wasn't long before he had the documents out, to see if you were correct.

 "Fuck me, you're right."

 "The signature's even a tad different. See the S." You pointed out to him.

 "Ok, so this means that one of them is lying."

 "I think it's worse than that Ty." He pulled his head back slightly as if he couldn't believe your words. "Let me ask you something. Have you ever seen Christopher?"

 His hand went to the back of his neck and he dropped his head down so he didn't have to look at you, a tell-tale sign he was nervous, only this time you knew he didn't want to admit something to you. "No, no I haven't. It's just…" He went to tell you his reason why but you stopped him. There would be time for explanations later.

 "I don't think he exists Ty." His head snapped up to look you straight in the eye.

 "How do you know this?"

 It was your turn to be ashamed now. "I went to her house. Well, I actually followed her and Kathleen first. I found her pulling the scam on someone else. She has a prosthetic baby belly and when I was inside there's nothing there that says she has a kid, not a bottle, rattle, anything."

 You saw him processing the information and what a toll it was taking on him. He sat down on the bed heavily, papers falling to the floor as he did. "You mean all this time; I've been paying for my son and he just doesn't exist." You hadn't expected him to take it this hard; though it was a lot to digest.

 "I don't think he does Ty." You sat beside him then, rubbing his back in a soothing motion. "I'm so sorry."

 "I don't even know what I'm feeling right now. Like part of me is relieved and, yet...I feel sad." He looked over at you then. "I could never really acknowledge him, you know? When she told me, all I could think of was that was the reason you left me, and every time I thought about him…" He exhaled a heavy sigh. "God I can't even say his fucking name."

 "It's ok Ty. I get it," and you did. You realized that Christopher was just an extension of your failed relationship and would always remind him of that one night he fucked up. It made sense when you looked at from his point of view, but it didn't make the fact that he lied about sleeping with Tara any easier on you.

 "What am I going to do?"

 "Well for starters, I think you need to ask Tara for a paternity test. Someplace where you all can go and get tested at the same time. That way she can't trick you in any way. You'll know then if she's telling the truth because she'll have to bring Christopher with her."

 "Yeah, yeah," He nodded. "That's a good plan. Where did you go?"

 "Well mine was mail in, but I think they have a place here in Dallas. I just got an email from them." You pulled the correspondence up on your phone, flicking it open for the first time. "What? No? This can't be right?"

 "What? Is something wrong?"

 "It says here that they mixed up my paternity samples and gave me someone else's by mistake." It started to sink in then. Tyler may not be the father of your unborn children. "Oh my god." You could see the confusion written on Tyler's face.

 "(Y/N), what does this mean?"

 You'd said so much this afternoon to him, you didn't know how to break this news, but you still had to do it. "I don't know if you're the father of these two babies." He pulled back as if you'd slapped him across the face; he was so stunned, but then so were you. You had so many questions, but the foremost thing in your mind was you had to tell Jamie. You got up, ready to head out of the room.

 "Where are you going?"

 "I have to tell Jamie, Ty. He has to know the truth."

 "I don't know if that's a good idea."

 "Why not?" Honestly, you couldn't see any harm in this news. In fact, Jamie would be ecstatic.

 "What if you get his hopes up, just to be let down. I know he loves you (Y/N). Cause god knows I still do. Don't crush him, if you don't have to." You sat there weighing your options, not knowing what to do. Part of you knew Tyler was right, but it just seemed so wrong to lie to Jamie.

  ****************************************************************************************

  Your turn to make a choice!

A)     Tell Jamie the truth, he needs to know.

B)     Decide to get a paternity test with just Tyler. Once you know the results you can tell Jamie.

#Choices series Tyler Seguin Jamie Benn #tyler seguin #tyler seguin imagine #tyler seguin imagines #jamie benn #jamie benn imagine #jamie benn imagines #nhl imagines #nhl imagine #nhl fanfic #hockey imagines #hockey imagine #hockey fanfiction

[back-and-totheleft]

“The Doors” Turns 30

Oliver Stone, 74, is seated for a Zoom interview at his home office in Los Angeles. He’s just finished reading an email proposing he direct a film about Led Zeppelin. “I don’t know much about them, frankly," Stone admits. "They were never really my band.” The Doors were his band. On March 1, 1991, the universe got its first look at The Doors — Stone's beautifully irrational biopic about the late '60s rock group led by Jim Morrison (played by Val Kilmer, then 31, amid a Method-acting spectacle). The result is an R-rated feast that acts as an extravagant rejection of puritanism and "Just Say No." It is campy, erotic, deeply disturbing and smoldering like a pagan bonfire.

On the occasion of its 30th anniversary, Stone talked to The Hollywood Reporter about the legacy of his film, psychedelics, Bohemian Rhapsody and Val Kilmer's masterclass as Hollywood's first and only Jim Morrison.

The cinematography in this film produces some astonishing eye candy.

We used a lot of filters. We had to go back into the past. We had everyone dressed in period, which was very expensive. We were also taking chances that we normally wouldn’t. We were growing in our boldness. We wanted to challenge all the ideas. We had no rules, no limits, no laws.

At least for my generation, the film has come to symbolize a darkly funny and dizzying parody of the “cock rocker.”

That was never my intention. I’m a little square, perhaps, for your taste, but I worshipped Morrison. I thought he was a great force breaking through to the other side. He was saying things that needed to be said. It was being said by others: Jefferson Airplane, The Beatles, and so on. But he was the only one that was really going into the erotica as much as he was. Of course, he talked about Indians, shamanism, but back then, we were coming out of the '50s. It was a very different time. He was liberated. He was sexy as a man. He felt at ease with himself. And he carried on as if he were a free man. I worshipped a free man. I’m actually one of the people who really likes his lyrics. Some people make fun of them.

The Doors feels like a rebuke of the Bush era and "Just Say No." Was Morrison acting as your mouthpiece when he was screaming at us that we were all "a bunch of slaves?"

Yes. The things I say sometimes don’t go down so well. But I don’t agree with so much of what’s going down. I still don’t. I haven’t changed. If anything, I’m worse. His timing may have been off when he said, “You’re all a bunch of slaves.” He was a philosopher.

Critics focused on the lack of historical realism in this film. But it’s a fantasy. Morrison himself was a kind of myth-maker. What do you think is rooted in the obsession for realism in a film about Jim Morrison?

By this time, I had been taking so much flak. I don’t mean to self-pity, but my God, I had just done Born on the Fourth of July, Talk Radio and Wall Street. I was exhausted by trying to be realistic. This was freedom. It was like tearing your clothes off and breathing. It was about going out and having fucking fun making a movie. After JFK and Heaven & Earth, I did Natural Born Killers. Again, I wanted to be free. I get off on those films.

I first discovered this film as a teenager. It somehow captured rock 'n' roll at its purest.

Thank you. I didn’t really have the connection to music that other people had. A lot of filmmakers study music. I didn’t. I just followed a god that I liked. You see, I heard him in Vietnam for the first time. I was doing LSD on R&R [rest and recuperation] — not in the field — but we were discovering LSD and realizing you really had to pay attention. Morrison had done enough LSD to really understand it. It’s a powerful consciousness journey. I never stopped. I kept going in that direction with all kinds of drugs.

Did you experiment with any psychedelics while you were making this film?

I was high, in a sense, by osmosis, but I had the attitude to just free your ass and your mind will follow. I think people would say I was pretty wild as a director. But I was not getting high on the set. Yeah, the occasional grass here and there, but I wouldn’t do anything on the set. Off the set, I had some fun. I had a friend, Richard [Rutowski], who played Death in the film. I wanted to go back to South Dakota, with the Sioux, and do this peyote ceremony with a very powerful shaman. And we did it. We got to this place on the reservation and got fucking high beyond belief. It was a big trip. A lot of Indians were involved. Strong peyote. And then we flew back. I was dead on Monday morning when we shot the peyote scene. I had no energy as a director.

What were some of the political challenges involved in making this film?

I guess I didn’t know the barriers back then. Paul Rothchild [the band’s producer] was a key figure. He was with us all the way. I never got that from the bandmates. They didn’t seem to know him that well. Certainly Ray Manzarek thought he knew him. Ray did not cooperate in any way. In fact, it was a very disagreeable relationship for me. And of course, when the movie came out, boy, he was tearing it down from the beginning.

I found Ray Manzarek accusing you of “assassinating” the character of Jim Morrison to be pretty remarkable. I honestly don’t think anyone knew the real Jim Morrison (not even Manzarek).

Jerry Hopkins, who wrote the book [No One Here Gets Out Alive, 1980] left me 120 documents of interviews he did with people who knew Morrison in the beginning, from grade school to the very end. And if you read these 120 versions of his life, it’s like Citizen Kane. That’s what he was to this person or that person. In the interviews, there were several women, my God, sexually, he was all over the place. He wasn’t necessarily impotent. Perhaps that occurred later, when there were issues — which did bother him. But you saw in the loft scene with Kathleen Quinlan, when he has an orgasm. And that’s the truth of the matter, he had orgasms with intensity that came from intense situations. That was the only way he could get off �� dangling from a window may have worked for him.

Morrison seems like the original “cock rocker.” I think he understood that he was a sex symbol.

Well, they made him a sex symbol. Part of the reason he started drinking was to probably run from that. He was not comfortable with publicity. I do believe he was inherently shy. Girls would come at him, and according to Paul [Rothchild], he ended up talking to them all night. He loved women. He talked them to death. But it wasn’t about sex. It was about something in his mind he had to work out. He was running toward death.

He was a sex symbol who was said to have been impotent. He seemed to be struggling with some kind of imposter syndrome. Was he crucifying himself?

I do believe there was a lot of self-hatred. He’s a deep man. If you really want to know him, look at the lyrics. There’s a lot of depth there that people often miss.

JFK (1991) provides a panorama of possibilities regarding the JFK assassination. With this film, you end with Morrison in a bathtub under a kind of amber glow. We don’t know what has happened to him. He’s just beautiful and dead. Were you trying to leave the cause of his death open to interpretation?

It didn’t make any difference to me if he was on heroin or not. In the movie, you have to assume he was. But he was half in love with death all his life. An American Prayer is filled with images of death. I don’t think Morrison made the normal difference between life and death. It was a boundary that he crossed many times. He was ready for death. I found the scene tranquil. Like the ancient Romans cutting their wrists, I didn’t see the fear of death in him. As a shaman, he saw it as a transition to continue life in another form. I would have loved to see him survive Paris. I think he died by accident. I do feel it was an overdose of something. I do feel like he was doing it to accompany somebody he cared about. I think his plan was to come back and be a writer. I think he would have been a really interesting writer and philosopher for American society into the '80s, '90s and even today. He got robbed early.

Looking back at his phenomenal performance, do you feel Val Kilmer was snubbed for an Oscar nomination that year?

I do feel he was slighted. It was a once-in-a-lifetime kind of performance. I certainly know the pain and the sweat he put into it. But I kind of knew The Doors was doomed because of the hijinks Morrison was going through. In other words, it was a crossing-the-line kind of movie. It’s become more acceptable now. But this is 1991. You gotta look back. Certainly Val deserved it, but also the sound: There were so many sound breakthroughs and editing breakthroughs in that movie. We were using some new methods. The sound work by Paul Rothchild and that group was unbelievable. The fact that Val was singing about 70 percent of his stuff was pretty significant.

I feel like a lot of today’s rock biopics, like Bohemian Rhapsody, are pretty sterile. They feel more like marketing films.

I don’t want to be negative on that. I wish we had made the money Bohemian Rhapsody had made. Look, every film has to be marketable. The Doors was not. We just made an outlaw film because [producer] Mario Kassar was out of his mind. He was willing to gamble. He didn’t give a shit about all that stuff. He was a pirate. He made films against the grain.

In the final shot at Père Lachaise cemetery, we zoom in to a bust of Jim Morrison placed on his gravestone. It’s a beautiful documentary-style shot scored to “A Feast of Friends.” It really takes us to the end. Wasn’t the bust stolen in 1988?

It was. The bust was our creation. It was based on Kilmer and not on Jim. But what the press never seems to understand when they describe it as a “rise and fall” is that he wasn’t falling. He was moving through life as an explorer. Some of his best work is in [1978's posthumously released L.P.] An American Prayer and [1971's] L.A. Woman. I didn’t see the decline. I guess what I’m saying is that you don’t die when you’re Jim Morrison, you just move on.

-Art Tevana, “Oliver Stone Recalls 'Doors' Inspiration as Jim Morrison Biopic Turns 30,” The Hollywood Reporter, Mar 11 2021 [x]

#art tevana #jim morrison #oliver stone #the doors #val kilmer #the hollywood reporter #bohemian rhapsody #music #rock and roll #led zeppelin #30th anniversary #cinematography #drugs #LSD #peyote

[wienerbarnes]

The List

Pairing: Bucky x Reader (Cheek to Cheek)

Word Count: 1,308

Warnings: just read it fam it’s nothing bad

A/N: send me some requests for this pairing to get my inspo going pls pls pls! they can be oneshot idea, headcannons, whatever yall think of! thanks for reading beautiful ppl

MAIN MASTERLIST | CHEEK TO CHEEK MASTERLIST

The broken down apartment building you led him to reminds Bucky a lot of his days in Bucharest. Probably some old landlord that doesn’t watch the news anymore that didn’t recognize you and offered you a place for cheap. Do you even have money?

Distant honks and yells are heard in the neighborhood, Bucky doesn’t even remember the last time he was in this part of town, East Bronx. It was a forty-five minute drive on his bike to get here, he has no idea how you’ve been making it over to his part of town. The thought of you hanging in these parts alone makes him feel sick so he just tries not to think about it at all. 

He pushes the creaky door to the building open and begins making his way up the stairs after observing not only an empty lobby area, but a scribbled “Out of Order” sign taped to the elevators.

“4B, 4B, 4B…” Bucky mumbles to himself as he glances at each door for its number. He hears a baby crying behind one, a couple arguing behind another, a television blaring behind the next, and finally; 4B. Complete silence behind your door.

Bucky lifts his gloved hand and softly leaves three knocks on your door. Not soon after, he hears about six clicks of various locks unlocking before you open the door wide enough to show yourself.

Bucky holds back his smile as he stares at your wrinkled, oversized white t-shirt that hangs over your frame and the large, wide jeans that cover legs and leaves only your pink-painted toes in sight. A small smile is shared between you two before you take a small step back to invite him in. 

The apartment is a big open space consisting of a small kitchenette, a card table with a soft tapestry draped over it and scented candles adorning the middle, as well as a simple, and probably cheap, bed frame and mattress laying inside. A deliciously soft-looking blanket is thrown over top of it. Mix-matched colors, different patterns, odd textures. 

She can’t use any of this shit in an emergency, Bucky thinks. But he doesn’t dare say anything as he notices you eyeing him, seemingly waiting for him to criticize your home. 

“It fits you. I like it.” Is all he says with a small smile, though big enough to show little dimples.

She smiles back, satisfied with his approval.

…

The two of you sit across from each other at her table. The tapestry draped above it is a light blue, the same shade of blue that he usually associates with you, with an off-white pattern printed on it. It makes for a great place to rest the hot chocolate she’s made for them using the small stove tucked within her kitchenette. Bucky silently watches as you pour a few extra spoonfuls of sugar into the already sweet drink. 

Bucky’s internally fighting with himself as you’re incredibly focused on pouring just the right amount of sugar into your cup, constantly tapping lightly at the spoon to shake some off, but then pouring it all back into the bag of sugar and scooping more again, restarting your process until you reach satisfaction.

Why did she invite me here? She’s so closed off, so private, but she gives me her address and a cute-sy little handwritten invitation? On my bike, too! How does she even know that I get around on a bike? Does she keep tabs on me the same way I do on her?

You glance at him as you’re finally stirring the sugar into your cup, bag crumpled closed and settled to the side of the table. The both of you stare at each other in silence, examining each other to the highest intensity.

“What are you thinking about?” You finally break the silence, eyebrows straight as to not let him know of your worry regarding what he thinks of you.

“Don’t you know what I’m thinking?”

“I’m not a mind-reader.”

“Then what are you?”

“Great question.”

Bucky watches as you take a long sip of your drinking, copious amounts of smoke flowing from the top, though you don’t react to the heat.

“Why did you invite me here?” Bucky finally asks, the words coming out as gently as he can make them.

The last thing he needs is for you to be offended by any question he asks and disappear for another six months.

He watches your eyebrows twitch upwards for a moment before stuttering, “I-Well… Isn’t this what you wanted?”

Now it’s his turn to be confused. The way his brows furrowed together must confuse you the same.

“All I want is for you to feel comfortable with me. I want you to trust me, and I want you to believe me when I say I want to help you. However long it takes and however you choose to let me in is all up to you, doll.” Bucky tries to keep his voice as even and calm as possible, as though his tone will shatter how far they’ve come with each other.

The two of you stare at each other for what could’ve been seconds, minutes, maybe hours before you clear your throat and glance to a spot over his shoulder.

“Can… Can I show you something?” You stutter out, visibly nervous about whatever it is you’re about to let him in on. Bucky gives you a welcoming nod, urging you to feel confident in what you’re going to show him.

But he never thought you’d show him something like this.

A list printed on a small, legal paper notepad, about two pages front and back. Names. Some he recognizes, some he doesn’t.

Maybe it’s nothing bad, maybe it’s something to help her remember, help her cope, maybe it’s her way of “letting go”, the way he sees people burn their papers in fire, maybe-

“It’s a hit list.” She confirms for him.

Maybe it’s a hit list.

Bucky tries not to react harshly, he doesn’t want you to back away from him now or be discouraged by the way he reacts, but he can’t help but be incredibly confused. Don’t you want to leave this kind of life? Don’t you want to not hurt people anymore? 

“...Why?” He tries.

He glances from the list on the table up to her face. Her eyes read oddly; there’s hints of anger and frustration and he can feel the tension radiating off her body from where he’s sitting.

“See this first one? He’s the one who killed my mom. Well, not my mom, but the woman who looked after me.” You begin to explain. Kathleen Grover flashes in his mind.

“This one underneath? He was one of my handlers under Hydra. He was always getting me in trouble for shit. The three guys under him were the handlers in charge of punishment. He’d get all their little buddies and-” Your voice cracks at the end and you look away from the list resting in front of Bucky.

He looks at you, his own heart feeling heavy and the sound of the struggles you’ve endured.

“Doll, I know that right now this might be what you want to do, but revenge doesn’t always guarantee relief and closure-”

“Bucky, either you help me or you don’t! I don’t care what you do, but either pick a side or leave me alone!” You snatch the list out from in front of him, your other free hand roughly wiping the tears from your soft cheeks. 

Small sniffles escape you as Bucky closes his eyes, weighing everything; his values, your happiness, justice, the difference between what is right and what is wrong. He takes a deep breath in and exhales while opening his eyes again, meeting your watery ones once more.

“Where do we start?”

#a ha ha #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x criminal!reader #criminal!reader #bucky barnes fanfiction #marvel #marvel fanfiction

[burnouts3s3]

A Long Post about Disney Plus

(Disclaimer: The following is a non-profit unprofessional blog post written by an unprofessional blog poster. All purported facts and statement are little more than the subjective, biased opinion of said blog poster. In other words, don’t take anything I say too seriously.)

A Long Post about Disney Plus

UPDATE: Movies such as Dumbo and The Lady and the Tramp have not been altered from their original content but instead include a disclaimer stating the movie may contain "outdated cultural depictions". Toy Story 2 still does not have the Stinky Pete scene. The episode "Stark Raving Dad" of the Simpsons is NOT on the platform.

So, the almighty Disney Corporation, aka, that giant conglomerate that has bought Marvel Studios, 20th Century Fox and Star Wars, is planning to release Disney Plus, a streaming service that has multiple shows, movies and original content under the Disney Banner.

And frankly, I’m a bit… worried.

Let me start off by saying, I’m not here to criticize you, the reader and potential consumer. However you want to spend your money is your business. If you wish to boycott Disney out of some personal philosophy or ideology or whatever reason, that’s your business. I’m not here to dictate how you spend your cash.

I would, however, like offer a humble suggestion before you decide to dive in head first into a potentially disastrous scenario.

So, Disney Plus is a streaming service that promises to provide lots of content to potential subscribers and let them view whatever content for a subscription. Obviously, this is Disney’s response and plan to combat other streaming services such as Netflix, HBOMax, Apple TV Plus and so on and so forth. While Streaming services aren’t nothing new, the addition of the Disney brand as well as the multiple Intellectual Properties under its umbrella.

What worries me is where both Disney and its potential customers go from here.

There’s already early reports of certain franchises being put “behind the Disney Vault” aka “We’re not rereleasing these films”. For example, the Aliens Franchise is apparently being one of those films.

www.alien-covenant.com/news/di…

However, Alien and other Fox properties will still be locked away in an effort to combat independent theaters and chains from profiting by screening those classic films.

Other reports indicate that certain films will be censored or excluded from the platform entirely. For example, the Siamese Cats from “The Lady and the Tramp” or Jim Crow from Dumbo will be cut out of their respective films entirely (and would explain why Disney is so keen on doing a live action remake of the Lady and the Tramp). Another case would be a Toy Story 2 after credits scene where in Stinky Pete is flirting with some Barbie Dolls and promising them parts for Toy Story 3.

boundingintocomics.com/2019/11…

CNBC also reports that Disney will remove its Jim Crow character from Dumbo. “The Jim Crow character from the original “Dumbo” will be edited out of the film version that appears on the streaming service.” This also isn’t new news. Boardwalk Times noted the scene would be changed back in April. They reported at the time: “The Jim Crow scene in 1941’s Dumbo will also be edited out for the digital library that launches November 12.” The scene was also removed for the recent live-action Dumbo remake from director Tim Burton as well. CNBC also reports a post-credit scene from Toy Story 2 featuring Stinky Pete will also be removed from the film on Disney+. The scene sees Stinky Pete appearing to seduce two Barbie dolls and promises he can get them roles in Toy Story 3.

Obviously, this is all legal. Disney owns the rights to the properties and they want to have a clean 21st Progressive Identity to hide behind. Besides, I suspected that “Song of the South” was never going to be on the platform.

But this is part of the same problem that everyone, even the most vocal Anti-Disney people, seem to be overlooking.

In which we, the consumer, are trading a product in favor of a service.

What I mean is that because of the success of things like Netflix, Hulu, Youtube, etc., too many of us have gotten used to the idea that we need to pay a subscription for digital access instead of paying a flat rate for a product. That’s NOT a good sign.

The debate of whether exclusive content such as the Original Series, The Mandalorian, is worth the price of admission or whether streaming services are necessary in the age of digital piracy are one thing, but in the age of dubious ownership and the doing away of physical content, ownership still matters.

It all goes back to one thing; when you subscribe to a service to access your content, the people you pay have the right to revoke your service and keep your money. That’s not a good thing regardless of political ideology. And while it’s tempting for PC gamers to pay for what amounts to a digital license to be onboard the same ship, the fact is having all that content tied to one account risks the danger of losing all that data if you should lose access to your account.

I’m a firm believer of owning physical media. For example, I own a Blu Ray of Assassination Classroom. No matter what I say or do online, I don’t have to be afraid of Chris Sabat kicking down my door and taking my Blu-ray away from me (or, at least, I shouldn’t have to…). Because when I buy a physical product, it’s mine as long as I don’t lose it or it isn’t damaged.

But a subscription (and to a lesser extent, a digital license) can be lost really easily.  Even if I were to take extra good care of my account and prevent people from hacking it, guess what? The people who make the content can revoke access.

Remember Minecraft: The Telltale Series? Interesting story. See, when Telltale when bankrupt, one of the games they had made, Minecraft, would no longer be accessible or downloadable from digital platforms, even to those who held the license.

Can you imagine what kind terrifying precedent that sets? Keep a movie or show permanently downloaded onto your storage or lose access to it forever? We’re dealing with a system that makes it so that you don’t own the stuff you paid for now!  

Owning a product gives me a plethora of options. It allows me to keep it, re-watch it, lend it to someone else or, if I decide to hock it for drinking money, sell it. It’s not perfect, but it’s preferable to having something that I paid for as opposed to having nothing. My loyalty to whatever company makes said product ends with a transaction (a transaction that can be easily outmaneuvered through a 3rd party purchase or sale). With a service, you can’t help but be loyal to said company.

If I start badmouthing Disney and Disney decides to deny me access to my subscription, my account or my digital licenses, guess what? I’m up a particularly smelly creek without a paddle.

I doubt Disney will go that far and will adopt a similar strategy to Funimation, as in they give digital vouchers for their Blu-ray series but it’s only redeemable on Disney Plus the same way digital vouchers from Funimation Blu-rays are only redeemable on its streaming service, FunimationNow. I also understand the economic argument in which lots of lower income families cannot afford specific shows and just want a plethora of options. But I know a step in the wrong direction when I see one and with stuff like Kevin Feige saying true Marvel fans must subscribe to said service or Disney saying Disney Plus subscribers will have early access to Frozen 2 or Captain Marvel, the case is there.

This is what happened to things like Dumbo and Lady and the Tramp and Toy Story 2. When you don’t own a physical content of your media, you’re at the whims of a corporation that can alter it whenever they want. 

We all have different opinions when it comes to taste or entertainment. But whatever your feelings on the Disney corporation, whether you think of Kathleen Kennedy’s leadership of the Star Wars franchise, whether you thought the Last Jedi was a piece of junk, whatever you feel about Disney’s relationship with China, one thing is certain. 

When you buy a product, you own that product. When you buy a service, the service owns you.

#disney plus #disney+ #disney #sjw #the last jedi #star wars #gamergate #netflix

[adabassist]

SKATING AWAY ON THE FRETLINES OF A NEW DAY

I expect that there’s not a single electric bassist out there who can’t remember the first time they got to play a fretless bass. The difference in the sonic, visual, tactile, even the emotional experience - it leaves an impression on almost every player, whether they pursue the instrument or not. It’s really as close to the human voice as a bass is gonna get. It’s a truly seductive instrument; it’s even downright sexy. If Kathleen Turner played bass, I’d bet you a dollar she’d play a fretless.

The passion I developed for this instrument consumed me; once I discovered the fretless bass, fretted basses became boring, limiting, and they just felt plain weird. I had a fretless with me everywhere I went, every gig, every studio date, every rehearsal, every trip out of town. I even took it on dates; hey, you never know, right?

My introduction to the instrument was anything but unique: my high school band teacher suggested that I get an album called Heavy Weather by a jazz fusion band called Weather Report. Upon hearing the opening track, “Birdland”, I immediately recognized the sound I was hearing as a bass, but it sounded like what that bassist was doing was impossible! As far as I knew, without a whammy bar, there was no way to make those harmonic notes move and slide like that… so I brought the cassette to my teacher and played the intro for him, and asked him how they were doing that… he said, “Well, isn’t Jaco Pastorius the king of the fretless bass?”

I said, “King of the what? And who’s Jaco?”

What followed was a desperate attempt to get my hands on a fretless, even just to try it; none of the music stores around had them (living in a flyover state with the nearest metropolis over an hour away has its disadvantages), nobody I knew had one or even knew anybody else who had one, and when I finally found an upstart guitar company who made a stock affordable fretless, my folks wouldn’t get it for me because, not being terribly musically inclined, they couldn’t understand why I would need a 2nd bass.

At this point my teacher moved away, and I found a new teacher at the music store the next town over. And HE happened to have a fretless bass, and he let me borrow it that summer while he was on vacation. He dropped it off on his way out of town, pretty close to midnight. I took it down into the basement and pulled it out and was all set to plug it in when I heard, “DON’T TURN THAT AMPLIFIER ON, YOUR SISTER IS SLEEPING!”

Jeez, not anymore I bet, Mom. “Okay, okay, I won’t turn it on…”

But there I sat, on my barstool in the basement, bass strapped over my shoulder, just plucking the strings and sliding my fingers up and down the fingerboard. For a good half an hour. If I had smoked, I would have needed a cigarette afterwards. (I told you it was sexy.)

The next morning I realized how amazingly difficult it was to play that bass in tune. No lines, hardly any useful reference points. Very difficult to figure out where I was on the bass. But the tone it created, and my desire to make more tones like that, superseded any concern about how much practice this was going to take. I finally got my very own fretless - a Rickenbacker 4001 - and really began concentrating on mastering it (much to the detriment of my grades in school).

One of my favorite things about the fretless bass is that the tone really lends itself to lyrical melodies. The instrument takes on qualities of the human voice in the middle to upper registers. And I found myself learning horn parts to jazz tunes as well as more traditional bass lines like those from my favorite rock bands, which ended up serving me really well down the road.

Another favorite thing is the fact that many fretless basses used to be fretted basses, and the slots leftover from said frets being removed usually get filled in with material of a contrasting color to the surrounding wood. These are known as “fret lines”, and if used correctly, they can greatly enhance one’s ability to play notes in tune. They are also the subject of great controversy among we bass nerds, as there are those who feel it’s “cheating” somehow. For my money, I’m on Team Fretlines.

So I practiced and practiced, and even went to music school for a year after high school, and came home and kept practicing. One thing led to another, and less than a year after I returned, I found myself auditioning for a band in the area that had already been signed to a small local record label, and was getting some pretty big gigs around the country, and needed a true fretless bassist, as opposed to a bassist who trots out a fretless as a novelty on stage for one song. Unbelievably, I landed the gig. Of course the REAL work was just beginning, but I was blessed with a really fast and accurate ear, and they decided to give me a shot.

I soon realized how green I really was compared to true professional musicians, and I had to make a concerted effort to keep up, but after a lot of hard work, not only did I learn to behave as a pro, but I really sharpened my ear and its relationship to my fingers… I was developing the ability to create a phrase in my head, and play it on my first attempt. (This is a big deal for musicians; imagine not being able to say much to anyone unless you practice it over and over, and you’ll have an idea of how most musicians approach music.)

Several years later (same band), I get a call from my keyboard player, who wants me to come in to the band studio the next morning before rehearsal (we recorded at one band member’s house, and practiced at another’s in the same neighborhood) so I can put down a bass melody for a demo of a song he’s writing for the next album.

I show up with my bass at 8am (yeech!), and we start discussing the song: “I need you to double that melody with the cheesy synth-sax sound. The song goes through the same chord progression 3 times, and the melody occurs during the 1st and the 3rd pass.”

“Got it. What happens during the 2nd pass? Should I just take a solo over the chords?”

“No, I’m going to have my sax player friend replace the synth melody, and he’s going to do a solo, so just leave it empty.”

Plugged in, got signal and levels. I was taught the melody - beautiful, and not too complicated. Cool little chord progression with a twist. He hit the record button, and I played the melody I had just learned along with the track.

As I played the final note, preparing to rest for the next 32 bars, he dropped a bomb in my lap: “Why don’t you just throw down a solo here anyway.”

This was exactly ZERO WARNING, for a song I had heard for the first time about 10 minutes prior. It’s like being thrown an enormous water balloon at 94 mph and being expected to catch it.

That’s when my brain became my best friend.

My ears said to my brain: here’s what should come next. tell the fingers to make this happen…

My brain said: i can do that! fingers, do this, this, and this, and then this.

And the phrase I thought would sound great instantly came out of the studio speakers.

I didn’t have time to be shocked; my ears were ready for the next phrase, giving orders to my brain, which meted them out. This happened at least a dozen times in a row, right up until the melody was supposed to re-enter. And my ears, having connected a long series of invisible dots over the last 60 seconds or so, even properly glued the last phrase to the beginning of the melody. It was like a factory assembly line: my frontal cortex had an idea, my ears refined it and made sure it fit the chords, the frontal cortex figured out where those notes had to be on the fingerboard, the motor cortex took those plans and sent the signals down to my fingers. And each set of “orders” took less time than the blink of an eye.

I peeked up after I got to the “safe zone” of the out melody (which I already knew), and my keyboard player’s jaw was on his chest. I had to remind myself to concentrate; after all, I was still recording.

When I finished, he hit the stop button, turned to me, and said, “How did you do THAT??”

I didn’t quite understand, so he rewound the tape and played back what I had just recorded.

And I was treated to a sonic representation of the way my brain and ears operate when they’re in top form. I had no memory of playing the actual solo (and I still don’t); it was a true transcendental experience. Yet, as I listened back to the track, I KNEW every note I was about to hear as if I had been waiting my entire life to play that solo. It was like a perfectly written story that practically told itself. 25 years later and I still know it by heart; haven’t thought of a single thing I’d do different. It was a complete stream-of-consciousness expression, in fretless bass solo form. I’ve never had another experience like it since.

We both kind of sat there for a few seconds after the song ended, and he finally said, “I don’t care what anyone else says; for my money, this song’s done. Let’s show this to the band at rehearsal.”

So we took it along and played it for everyone else. Everyone loved it, but the bandleader said, “I know that was an amazing solo, but there’s already too much fretless on the upcoming record. I think the solo should be sax instead. I hope you understand.”

And I did understand, even if it was a bit of a bummer. Oh well, at least I had a copy of my solo on cassette tape for posterity.

Sax player showed up a few days later, on a day when I wasn’t there, to play the melody and do a solo, but there was a problem - he had been sent the same demo tape that I had, with my solo on it, and it was influencing his improv in a way that didn’t really suit the sax. He finally said, “I need to skip the solo. The melody is fine, no problem, but I keep veering off course during the solo because I hear the bass solo in my head so strongly.”

So the bandleader calls me and tells me what happened, and that he’s decided that HE will play an electric jazz guitar solo over the chord changes (he did this regularly in the group, and to great effect). Okay, great. Curious as to what I’ll hear in two days when it’s done.

Two days later I get another phone call: “I can’t do it. I keep playing stuff that works great on the guitar, and it fits the changes nicely, but the phrases just sound disconnected, I keep hearing your solo in my head, and I can’t seem to fix it. Would you mind if I transcribed your fretless solo and played it on the jazz guitar?”

“Feel free, it’d be an honor,” I said. Good thing FaceTime wasn’t a thing back then, because I’m sure I was smirking.

The next day I arrived at the studio to record another song for the new record, where I find the bandleader standing outside shaking his head.

“Did you finish the solo? How’d it go?”

“Yep. And I hate it.”

“What happened?”

“I spent over an hour last night transcribing your part. And I just spent another hour recording it. You know what it sounds like?”

I had an answer ready, but I wasn’t about to say it out loud if I didn’t have to. I figured I’d let him say it instead, which he did:

“It sounds like a bunch of great fretless bass licks, played on the wrong instrument. I think we should just use your original bass solo.”

Now that’s taking the long way around to come to the right decision.

When I look back on that moment, I find it amazing that I don’t remember coming up with the phrases, and I certainly don’t remember anything happening that pulled me out of that “mode” I was in; the solo all but wrote itself, and I was simply the conduit. But I remember my bandmate’s reaction.

Since then, I have tried to conjure that mojo dozens of times, with varying degrees of success, but never quite to that level. But it showed me what was possible within the realm of performance. All those scales and exercises and hours upon hours of practice were paid off in that one instance of musical epiphany and pure expression. It was enough to ensure I’ll die a happy man.

[safflowerseason]

veep rewatch 3.01

Some New Beginnings

aka - The One With the Book Tour 

Richard! I love Richard. I love what he brought to the Veep ensemble and I love that the dumbest, purest person in the ensemble ended up as the sidekick to the other dumbest and most vile person in the ensemble. I didn’t mind that he suddenly had a doctorate in American constitutional law or whatever (it’s not like being an academic means you are a functional adult with practical life skills), and even though his rise to the presidency in S7 is patently stupid, I just love his bumbling, relentlessly positive, and super literal approach to life. Sam Richardson is great. 

“I call it Some New Beginnings because it’s plural!”

Now begins the reign of Kathleen Felix Hager, who immediately injects more life into Selina and Amy’s business wardrobes. We won’t really see the change until the next few episodes—Selina always wears a red dress in the premiere, and Amy’s at a wedding where she can’t wear a monochrome skirt-suit or a shirt-dress—but still, it’s very exciting!! And KFH does manage a slight departure with Amy’s formalwear, which has previously tended to dark colors and conservative necklines. This turquoise dress is the brightest and lightest color we’ve seen on Amy so far, and she looks stunning.

As discussed previously, I appreciate that the costume team did not feel the need to vacuum-pack a clearly post-baby Anna Chlumsky into some Spanx underneath her dress, or choose a looser dress for her to wear. The dress is very well-tailored and they’re not trying to hide anything—every newfound curve is on display. Meanwhile, Dan looks very good in his totally-not-intentional matching suit and not at all like Amy’s boyfriend. It’s not like he’s standing next to her in pictures and sharing the cost of a wedding present and making jokes about the fact that they’re basically married. What a ridiculous notion. 

Mike: See what everyone's gifting us? Some New Beginnings, Our Next American Journey. Dan: Really well written…by me. (He’s offscreen for this line, but I love this little aside…one day I’m going to write a one-shot where Dan writes Selina’s book. Ugh, Writer!Dan...so hot.)

Amy: Selina’s never been away without us this long before.  Dan: I guess this is what it’s gonna to be like when our kids go to college too, huh, sweetie?  Amy: Yeah, dream the fuck on, Dan.  Dan: You know I'm only being nice to you because I know that Selina's gonna make me the campaign manager. Dan’s version of being nice to Amy is teasing her about their future children. I cannot. This whole exchange is just too much for my heart now. (Also, what a ballsy thing to say while Amy is ostensibly dating another man. Dan must be feeling very confident in his relationship with Amy at this moment.) 

His unhinged impatience with Hughes not announcing is some neat foreshadowing that he’s going to be a terrible campaign manager. 

I enjoy Mike and Wendy’s relationship…Kathy Najimy is lovely and funny, and she and Matt Walsh have a fun chemistry. She has a kind of smooth composure to her manner that’s a good contrast with the more frenetic energy of Selina’s staff. 

I like to think part of the reason Dan snarks at Amy for not having a second phone is that he really just wants to be scheming with her at all times. 

Selina: So, these rumors, right? I'm getting Maddox. What are you getting?  Richard: I…I’m not getting a huge amount, if I'm being honest. Selina: Hey, Richard, no offense— Richard: None taken. Selina:—you’re a catastrophe.

In general, Iannucci Veep is better at marking time than Mandel Veep, but seriously…when is this wedding happening? We know it’s been two months since the S2 finale, in which both Selina and Amy appeared to be wearing clothes appropriate for mid-late D.C. spring (long sleeved dresses on both of them). So if it’s two months later, does that mean we’re in May-June? The end of June can be hot in D.C., but everyone is walking around outside dressed like it’s a pleasant spring day. Furthermore, the timeline is complicated by Episode 2, when it seems like we’re suddenly in early autumn…but also, Mike is on his honeymoon and Jonah has clearly just been fired! So WHEN is this wedding?! (Some of this confusion is obviously influenced by the uncontrollable dimensions of filming on location, such as weather…) 

Love how Ben goes straight to the minibar in Selina’s suite. 

Ben: So where’s the team?  Selina: They’re all at Mike’s wedding…I kind of miss ‘em. *phone rings* Oh, it’s just Gary, press ignore. 

Dan and Jonah’s scene in the bathroom made me actually kind of miss their DC bro antagonistic energy. I can’t believe they shared no scenes together in S7!

First mention of Bill Ericsson…considering how many political flubs/bone-headed campaign decisions Bill actually makes in the series, he doesn’t exactly live up the all-knowing ice-god of strategy reputation they give him in the beginning. (My blog is basically an anti-Bill Ericsson blog now, sorry.)

Dan: You keep a second phone there? Hypocritical…and horny.  Love Reid Scott’s eyebrow arch on this line. 

Jonah: “Team Veep goes into meltdown as Sec Def Maddox news breaks”….And upload the money shot. Sue: I hate how he learned English from pornography. 

Richard: Ma’am, if you need any help with your campaign, I'm real good in a high-pressure situation. Selina: Really? In what sense “good”? Richard: Well, I was all over that book line thing.

It is intriguing how…active Dan is in this episode compared to Amy, or to be more specific, how his actions are highlighted by the script in a way that hers are not. He manipulates Jonah to get the ball rolling on the President’s announcement, runs back to the White House to witness/further exacerbate the fallout from that, actually asks Selina to make him the campaign manager, and in general is just furiously scheming all over the place. And it’s all explicitly tied to his desire to be the campaign-manager. Meanwhile, Amy is Hendrix-texting and presumably dealing with the Maddox news in some way, but we don’t really see her doing it. This will be a trend to follow in the first half of the season…some interesting gender dimensions to trace, for sure. 

Kent: Don’t go interrupting any major sporting events! Unless it’s golf. 

Jonah: I’ll be back! I’m gonna be back as the fucking President. Jonah Ryan, 2026!  Staffer: That’s a midterms year, Jonah.  Jonah: Well then I’ll change it!

I tend to think that Jonah’s career as a politician was a Mandel-era idea, but I do wonder with this line what Iannucci’s team of writers had planned for the character, if they also saw Jonah as an actual campaigning politician rather than just representative of the scuzzy underlings who populate D.C.

If it’s day six of the book tour, it makes you wonder how long Selina has been separated from her team. In light of Amy’s comment, it’s interesting to think about the logistical ramifications of it…six days feel like a stretch for Selina to be without her full staff, especially Gary and Amy. Not to mention Dan would want to gloat on the road about the success of “his” book. Were they just all on the book tour with Selina and then flew back to DC for a quick weekend wedding break? That would explain why they all appear to arrive together, at the very least. 

“The seven foot mouth” is maybe my favorite Jonah insult of all time. 

Amy’s drunk dancing is so cute! (In contrast, it is literally impossible for me to imagine Dan drunk dancing.) 

#veep rewatch #3.01 #veep season three #some new beginnings #the seven foot mouth #dan x amy #selina meyer #dan egan #amy brookheimer

[jacobpaulnielsen]

Interview with Oz Fritz on working with Tom Waits and the making of 1999′s Mule Variations

Jacob Nielsen: Do you have phases with bands?

Oz Fritz: I listen to the music I grew up with all the time when I'm driving. I make mix CDs, so I have about 50 mix CDs and Dylan is definitely fairly prominent. When I first heard "Like A Rolling Stone" I had a religious experience. I kinda stopped following him when he did the Frank Sinatra songs. I didn't get that. Some of the bootlegs, the production sounds better to me than the actual album because the songs are not overly produced. A lot of his albums have terrible production. That's one thing.

JN: What do you mean?

OF: It could mean kind of a number of different things, but just that there's no excitement in the track or it obviously sounds like a drum machine. There's no real qualifier I could say that makes it sound "not good" to me. For Dylan's whole style - if you've read about how he records, he likes to record really fast and sometimes that doesn't translate. Some of his other, later stuff, is produced really well. Like "Love and Theft" and the one after that.

JN: Was it Time Out of Mind? 

OF: Time Out of Mind is a classic. Although, that one gets to sound a bit dated at times. But yeah, that's a very good production. Actually, getting back to Tom Waits...that [album] very much inspired Tom Waits. And from what I've heard, and what I'm told, Dylan was inspired by Tom Waits. 

JN: Those are two big personalities.

OF: And then there was the fact that right around then, when Dylan was touring he always had a bullet mic. A bullet mic is a kind of a green, specialty mic made by Shure that's specifically for harmonica. Plugging a mic like that directly into an amp gets that distorted sound. Tom kind of used it as part of his lo-fi aesthetic. That was a mic he would sing into to get a lo-fi version of a vocal. And so Dylan toured with that. Besides a regular mic, he had this bullet mic which, according to Tom, he never used but it was there. 

I know Tom was influenced by Time Out of Mind because the next record we did was a record Tom produced from John Hammond Jr. called Wicked Grin and he hired the same keyboard player that had been on Time Out of Mind. His name is Augie Meyers. He's an old veteran musician from Texas. Tom put together the whole band for that album and Augie Meyers was included because of his work on Time Out of Mind. 

When I was working with Tom [beginning with Mule Variations], he was constantly telling me influences and things like that. There was a constant flow of information. I know that Time Out of Mind wasn't on his radar at that point. 

JN: What were the reference tracks like for Mule Variations. Would Tom say, you know, I want "Hold On" to sound like this Rod Stewart song?

OF: No he wouldn't be that specific. Before we started, he wanted me to listen to the Radiohead album that had just come out. He wouldn't say why or what specifically about it I should hear. Just a general aesthetic I guess. 

JN: Bands like Radiohead don't seem very "on brand" for a guy like Tom Waits.

OF: Oh man. He stays really on top of what is happening. He told me about The White Stripes before anyone had ever heard of 'em. I think another one might have been The Strokes. He stays pretty involved. 

At some point near the end [of the Mule Variations sessions] he and Kathleen went to a Bjork concert. He was extremely impressed by her turntablist, who wasn’t just scratching but playing samples from records. That caused Tom to find a DJ and bring him in and have him throw some stuff down. 

JN: Right. There are samples on ‘Big In Japan’, right? What was that like in the studio?

OF: He’s constantly recording stuff. Back then, it was on cassette. I was just given a loop. Primus was doing the music for that and so he just played the loop and they played the song. It was longer, too. He edited some of the lyrics out. It got to be a little bit long, he decided. 

JN: Mule Variations is 16 songs, but it was meant to be 25. So that’s a double album. What songs were cut from the album? 

OF: There’s one called “Lost at the Bottom of the World,” which is on Orphans, and there’s one that’s never made it anywhere and it’s actually one of my favorite songs of his. It’s called “Always Keep a Diamond in Your Mind”. We recorded [Always Keep a Diamond in Your Mind] for Mule Variations and we recorded a different version for Alice. It did find life. Solomon Burke put it on one of his records. I didn’t think he did justice to the song. I love Tom’s versions way more. Those are the only ones I remember off hand. 

JN: Years ago, you had told me that the album was called Mule Variations because of all the different versions of “Get Behind the Mule”. 

OF: That’s right.

JN: Was that similar for songs like “Always Keep a Diamond in Your Mind”? Did he record that song a bunch of different ways, too? 

OF: No we only had one...or maybe two different versions. I don’t remember. He worked on it. It was definitely a song in contention [for the record]. He obviously loved the song enough to put it down again on the next albums [Alice and Blood Money]. I don’t know what went in his process on not putting it on the record. That is something he has in common with Dylan that I’ve found. Some of Dylan’s best songs, he’s not put on record. There’s one called Blind Willie McTell. Some consider it one of his best songs. 

Marc Ribot once told me (and this is just people’s theories and opinions) that Tom is wary of power. If something sounds too powerful, it turns him off.

JN: I wonder about his definition of power. I hear a song like “Come On Up to the House” or “Anywhere I Lay My Head” and I’m like holy shit. Tom has this amazing ability to sound like someone who is just totally broken. To me that’s very powerful. 

OF: Well, Marc could have been coming from the point of view of his guitar playing. We did a whole week of Ribot doing overdubs, and I love his guitar playing. At the end of it I told him that and Marc’s comment was “well...we’ll see how much of it is used.” So I think Marc might have found stuff that was really powerful in his guitar playing and it didn’t make it on to the records. 

JN: What can you recall about some of the equipment that was used on the album?

OF: So the first record that Tom did at Prairie Sun was Bone Machine. At that point, there was no “Waits Room,” there was nothing done in those lower rooms. There was only the tracking room - Studio B - and then there was the mixing room - Studio A. Studio B, the live room, sounded good but it was very generic sounding. So they started this record [Bone Machine] and they had him all set up. After one playback, Tom just hated it. He hated the sound. It lacked character, for him. So he wasn’t going to do the record there. He then had the idea to do it at his house. He rented a whole bunch of mics and mic-pres, took it to his house with engineers, but apparently it also didn’t work there. So he came back to Prairie Sun and they were just walking down that driveway. Tom was trying to think of what to do and he looked over and saw that building that has the Waits Room in it. He went in. It was a storage room and he said “well, what would this room be like if we took all the junk out of it?” So they did and it sounded amazing. So the Waits Room was actually born during the making of Bone Machine. 

So for Mule Variations, which was now eight years later, he came back and he wanted to do it in that same room. This time he took over that whole floor. At that point there was no mixing board there. No control room either. It wasn’t its own studio. The control room was upstairs in Studio B. There were lines that ran from the basement [Studio C] to the upstairs [Studio B]. It was really physically hard. To adjust a mic, I’d have to run down the hill, adjust the mic, and run up the hill. We set up playback down there so they could listen back without having to come up to the control room. That whole floor was utilized for the recording. There were two rooms: the Waits Room and the Corn Room. The Corn Room is a much bigger room. [We tracked] between those two spaces, but sometimes we used the middle part of the studio. 

So Tom would be playing in the Waits Room, he’d either be playing a guitar or piano, and he would be singing. This was basically his modus operandi for almost all of the songs, or maybe all of them: he would record his basic part first and then add stuff on. A lot of the songs, like Get Behind the Mule, would just be him, another piano/rhythm guitar, Larry Taylor (an upright bass player), and then a guy usually doing hand percussion. Occasionally, like for Filipino Box Spring Hog, drums would be set up outside the Waits Room. The door would be open so they would all have sight line and feel like they were in the same room.

As far as the equipment, he’s still all analog and analog approach. The recorder was a suitor 880 and all the mic pres were on that Neve desk upstairs [in Studio B]. This was in ‘98 or ‘99, I think maybe ‘98. Pro Tools had just come out, and Tom likes to check out new technology. Like I said, he likes to stay on top of things. 

There’s a long story about how Jacquire King got involved. I went and interviewed with Tom to do the record and then Tom kept delaying the start time. I had a bunch of dates already booked with Bill Laswell to do live sound in the summer, which I wasn’t going to give up because he’s a long term client and friend of mine. So I told Tom when they finally got the start date “there’s gonna be some days I’m not gonna be here because I’ve got to go overseas.” Tom said “Well, you know I don’t want to keep switching engineers. You know, I really love your vibe. We’ll probably do something in the future, but I want to have one engineer for the whole thing.” So, cool. Whatever. He went looking for another engineer and he’d heard about Jacquire King. They brought him up to Prairie Sun for the interview. Tom’s interview consists of a session. He doesn’t tell you when you’re going for the interview. When you get there he says, “Okay, let’s do some recording.” They did that for Jacquire and Jacquire was not experienced with analog recording at the time. They didn’t like his recording. They tried a thing in the Waits room and it just didn’t work out. So I got a call the next week from Tom, saying that he and Kathleen both like Jacquire but they realized he didn’t really have his chops up yet on analog recording. So...would I be willing to be the chief recording engineer? [I’d] set the parameters, meet with Jacquire, and show him how I do analog recording. The thing Tom liked about Jacquire was he was a Pro Tools engineer. So Jacquire became more than just a substitute for me. He brought out Pro Tools and they used it on FIlipino Box Spring Hog. Lowside of the Road might have been mixed [on Pro Tools] too. 

JN: What is the difference in mixing on Pro Tools vs. Analog?

OF: At that point, I don’t think they were using Pro Tools in the box, which means to completely mix something in the computer, strictly digital. It doesn't go to a mixing desk or any other gear outside the computer. They were using Pro Tools as the source instead of a tape machine. The reason they were using Pro Tools was because he was kind of cutting and pasting stuff and moving stuff around. Which is a lot harder to do with tape. 

I would say the whole record is maybe 80 or 90 percent analog. Even the Pro Tools stuff wasn’t mixed in Pro Tools. It went out, back through the Neve and then mixed to analog tape. 

JN: On a song like Lowside of the Road, the beginning sounds like a man snoring. Is that a vibraslap making that sound?

OF: That song had its genesis somewhere else. It came from an 8 track tape that he had. I think he recorded it at his house. That’s where the basic tracks were. They brought that into Prairie Sun and they overdubbed on top of that. I’m not sure how it started. 

JN: On Mule Variations there are a lot of these images that are “painted” with sound. Was that sort of stuff a directive to you? Did Tom say “Oz, I want this to sound like a guy snoring.”?

OF: Nothing was ever that specific. But the visuals, when you say “painted,” that’s very accurate. He wouldn’t say “make it sound like a guy’s snoring,” but when I was mixing or overdubbing Cold Water, he said he wanted more brown in the mix. Which I knew. I could relate that to a particular range or frequencies. 

When we were mixing Alice, he’d give these real abstract images. He said, “Oz. Picture yourself in a dollhouse. You’re in a dollhouse. You’re in a room in a dollhouse and a regular size person comes in and sticks their face into the dollhouse. That’s how I want my vocal to sound.”

JN: That seems pretty on brand for Tom Waits. Is that pretty unique in comparison to other artists you’ve worked with?

OF: It’s totally unique. No one else has come close to being like that in terms of direction. Bill Laswell once told me when we were working on a dub record and he told me I should reference a book called Naked Lunch by William Burroughs. That’s the only thing that comes close. 

There was a more traditional reference that came from Tom too. There’s a drummer named Andrew Borger, who’s on the record. He had made a tape, a cassette, of him playing drums. It was like an audition tape. And it was slightly overloaded. It had a particular sound, which Tom loved. He brought me that cassette tape and told me to emulate that sound. Man, it was really hard. I got a great sound, I thought. It’s the drum sound for Filipino Box Spring Hog. It’s much different than the cassette tape but that was my attempt to get that reference. 

JN: Tom is someone who’s very famous for his different voices. Songs like Pony and Cold Water are great examples of his range. Tell me about recording his different voices.

OF: They were all the same microphone, those two particular songs. There wasn’t a lot of variation on microphones. There was a lot of processing done in the mixing to try to sculpt the vocal sound. In Get Behind the Mule, he’s singing through a PVC pipe. That was the same microphone, but obviously it sounds way different because he’s singing through a pipe. That was completely his decision to do that. 

There was one time though, there was a session on the Blood Money album, where he was trying to get this song and he just couldn’t get it. I suggested to him to try a real lo-fi mic. He did and that’s how he got the vocal. That was a bit of an exception. Generally, it was always kind of the same mic that he sang into. 

Tom wanted to record Chocolate Jesus outside. He set everyone up in front of those white doors that are in front of the Waits Room. Jacquire mic’d everything up. When Tom heard it he thought it sounded too nice. Too high fidelity. So Jacquire went back. He took down all his close mics, put up a pair of shotgun mics, and recorded the whole ensemble just with these shotgun mics. I technically mixed that song but there wasn’t much to do because there were only two channels. 

JN: That’s another song that really paints a picture with sound. That recording feels like a hot summer day in the Deep South. Tom sounds exhausted, almost like a sharecropper. 

OF: Right.

JN: You don’t seek out a production credit on albums you work on, do you?

OF: Right. There’s no producer. There’s a reducer. 

JN: It sounds to me like Tom seeks out people that will help him shape the sounds that he has, not vice versa. 

OF: Yeah. You’ve got to sort of realize your place though, too. He never told me this, I was trained this way in New York...the artist is the boss. I’m doing their record. I’m not doing my record. The only creative stuff I felt free to do was on the technical side. Nowadays you have a lot of musicians who do their own engineering, so they’ll start giving you engineering suggestions. Stuff like what mics to use or even how to place them. Which is fine, but Tom never went near that at all. One time he wanted me to hear the sound of a whip on a cassette in the back of his SUV that was cranked incredibly fucking loud [laughs]. He would just try to give you references to try to go for. 

[In Listen Up!] there’s a chapter about working with Tom Waits. He talks about giving these ideas to Tom and Kathleen. He’d come up with these sounds or whatever, you know, “check this out, let’s use it!” type of thing. At one point he talks about how Tom called him up at the hotel, and if you read the book you’ll get a lot of very colorful imagery of Tom basically saying “back the fuck off,” but he says it much more politely. 

Some other input I got was, Tom was very influenced by this turntable DJ that Bjork had, and so he brought a guy in [to do that]. He was also very interested in samples. I had a sound effects library and I brought that in and we used some of the effects off of that. 

My sound effects library was on these things called DATs (Digital Audio Tapes). They were the same quality as recordable CDs. During the 90s, I was living sort of bi-costally. All of my work was back in New York and most of my work was with Bill Laswell at his Greenpoint studio in Brooklyn. Above his studio, I had converted it into an art gallery and I used to stay above the studio. I had a lot of time. I basically dubbed all of Bill’s CD sound effects and put them on DATs. [During Mule Variations], I’d bring the whole thing in. We put an auctioneer on Eyeball Kid. Tom would just come up with ideas and we would just go through [my DATs] and choose one. 

JN: The first track that comes to mind with something like your library is “What’s He Building?” Did you rely on your sound effects library when you were tracking that song?

OF: Well, that was a pretty unique recording. He did three or four takes of that song, but there was no overdubs added afterwards. Everything was completely live. It’s that big room, The Corn Room, at Prairie Sun. Tom brought any musical instrument that he had at his house, he brought to Prairie Sun. That whole floor was just tons of instruments. He had all this home-made percussion. The kind that Harry Parch would make. So there was all kinds of instruments like that in the Corn Room and he just started doing the vocal, the spoken word on a handheld mic. An SM7 or something like that. Then Kathleen and the assistant engineer at the time, Jeff Sloan (who was also a percussionist), made the background sounds. All the background sounds are them hitting stuff just kind of randomly while Tom’s doing the spoken word. Some of the sounds are from the harp of a piano just being hit. That was all done live, but he edited some of it out. There were a lot more verses.

JN: Really?

OF: Oh yeah. The guy was definitely building something in there. 

JN: This album was recorded at the peak of the CD boom in the music industry. A lot of people, at least at Tom Waits’ calibur, were recording digitally. Is there any insight as to why Tom kind of insisted on doing things analog?

OF: At Prairie Sun back then, there were no Pro Tools and that was how you recorded there. At my interview with Tom, I told him I had been listening to Bone Machine and I really liked the sound of it. 

He said “No, don’t use that as a reference. You should be listening to Rain Dogs. That’s the one I want to use as a reference for my recordings.” 

It just so happened that I knew the difference in the recording between Bone Machine and Rain Dogs. [Robert Musso], who recorded Rain Dogs, was one of my engineer teachers in New York. I knew that they did it by the New York standard, which is 30 inches per second for the tape speed, no noise reduction. I knew that Bone Machine had been recorded in California at 15 ips, half the speed and using noise reduction. The difference in those techniques is that, when you use noise reduction, you can’t slam the tape. You can’t hit the tape hard. Part of the whole New York aesthetic was...record at 30 ips, hit the tape as hard as you can without blowing things up and you get a thing called tape compression. That’s partly what makes things sound that punchy. That’s part of why Mule Variations has a bigger, more open sound. Whereas, with Bone Machine - which I love the sound of [and] I think Tchad Blake did a really excellent job mixing it - sounds a little tighter or closed.

JN: What do you mean when you say “hit the tape”?

OF: Record at a hot level, so your drums [for example] are hitting your VU meters. They’re slamming it. When people say they love the sound of tape, a lot of that is recording it to its maximum headroom. You don’t get quite the same effect when you’re doing it at 15 ips and using noise reduction. Noise reduction is severely processing the sound. Partly, the reason why records from the 50s and 60s and 70s sound bigger was the whole philosophy was using as little electronics as possible. To go as much as you could directly from the mic to the tape recorder and have as few electronics in between as possible. So that was kind of the aesthetic brought to Mule Variations. As much as possible, direct to the tape machine. With Dolby noise reduction, it’s encoding the sound when it goes into the tape machine and then decoding the sound when it comes out. That’s how it’s taking out the noise, but it’s being processed. [The sound] doesn’t go through that stage if you’re not using noise reduction. If you’re not using noise reduction, you’re almost obliged to record at a loud level because when you record at a louder level, you’re not going to get as much noise.

JN: Did Tom know that you had studied under Robert Musso?

OF: No. I told him at the interview, but he hadn’t known that prior. He did check me out a little bit. When he called me the very first time and he asked for a sample of my mixes, he called them “hyper real.” They were too big, or maybe too powerful for him. I think part of it was that he needed a professional engineer that was in the area. I’d been recommended to him by Brain, the drummer for Primus. I knew Brain from New York. The thing that Tom was super impressed with was, I sent him a tape of my ambient recording. Stuff that I had done out on the street. Interesting things. Just sounds. He liked that more than my actual mix reel. 

JN: How do you approach miking a room like the Corn Room?

OF: Well, I always had room mics. I had two U87s up in the corners of the Waits room along with all the close mics. It’s just a matter of putting up extra mics, having ambient mics. For a drum track, I use four sets of ambient mics. Two for the whole room, to get the biggest room [sound] as possible. Two that I call boom mics. They’re not close mics, but they’re not real distant so they’re like if a person was just standing in front of a drum kit.

This was an educational experience for me too. I never worked on anything like Tom Waits. I’m writing a book - my memoir about the music industry. Part of what I say in there is, when I was in New York, I learned how to make things sound as big and powerful as possible. We went to extra lengths to push the boundaries. Coming out and working with Tom Waits, that was a whole different aesthetic. He didn’t want it to sound as big, beautiful, and shiny as possible. [His] whole lo-fi aesthetic was a huge educational part of my recording career. 

Years ago, you told me that the initial mix of Hold On had these beautiful guitar arpeggios. Then Tom comes to you and says “Oz, some guy like Rod Stewart is going to come along and cover this song,” and so he didn’t want it to sound too pretty. How many other times did he come back and say “it sounds too good”?

That was really the only time. Mixing was challenging, definitely. We finished tracking and we moved from the tracking room at Prairie Sun to the mix room, which had a different board and was configured differently back then. We spent a week there, mixing. He would always love the sound of it when he was hearing it in the control room. We’d make a cassette for him but he’d listen at home and he wasn’t digging the mixes at all. It was getting to be every single day that was happening. So I was getting kind of nervous. Like, at what point am I going to get fired? 

We decided that what he didn’t really like was the sound of that board. It was a Trident board. It did have a much different sound than the Neve board. We were constantly making rough mixes. He really dug the sound of the rough mixes done in the Neve room [Studio B]. So the whole thing was…”Okay, after this week we’re going back into Studio B to mix on the Neve.” But there was one day, a Friday, when we mixed Big in Japan [on the Trident board]. At that point it had been four or five days of not really hearing anything he liked when he got home. He said “okay, give me a cassette.” He wasn’t even that thrilled with what was happening. I made him a cassette of Big in Japan and he brought it home and he just loved it. He loved the mix. All he said was he wanted the edits put back in. The tape that had been edited out was on the floor, so I had to go and dig through all these pieces of tape, find the right piece and put it back into the song. That was the mix. 

In terms of the mixing...it was a long process. He had me and Jacquire each do our own versions of mixes. I think Jacquire has three on there, or two of ‘em, from Pro Tools and then I have the rest. Most of the mixes I did, that he accepted, four or five of them were done in one night. He gets into this thing where he likes to work really fast. He doesn’t want people thinking too much. Just working on instinct. I think it was the night of Hold On that we were on a roll and did four or five songs. Eyeball Kid was mixed that night, then Come On Up to the House. 

Alice was done the same way too. He always worked Monday to Friday and took weekends off. On a Friday he walks in and says “Okay, Oz. Let’s do some mixing.” I started mixing some songs and I think we mixed three or four, just knocked them off. He loved it. He said “Well Oz, we’re on a roll. Can you stay over and work tomorrow?” Okay, sure. I worked on Saturday and I think we mixed maybe 90% of the album in those two days. That’s after trying mixes, you know, regular. Spending a whole day on a song.

JN: How many other people work like that?

OF: Well...no one. Bill Laswell to some extent, also works really fast. People have that recognition when something is happening, and they know when to stop and not to take it too far. Tom’s like that. He’s always trying to keep it alive and fresh and not too overly worked. 

[Working on Mule Variations], you didn’t know exactly what you were going to do every day. You might be thinking, okay, we’ve got all the songs done. We’re going to do overdubs today. And then he’d say, “I’ve got a new song.” It was always very Zen in the sense of...you had to pay attention to what was going on. 

JN: What new songs did he come in with?

OF: There’s one on Orphans. Rain On Me, I think it’s called. That was one where, I think we were mixing and he’s like “okay, I’ve got a new song. I want to record this.”

On Blood Money and Alice, three of the mixes were just complete rough mixes. Two of them were from [when] we recorded everything live and then the band would come in for a playback. I would run the playback into a DAT, which was CD quality. Just to hear the monitor mix. Two of those mixes were the first time anybody had ever heard it on tape, including myself. That’s just my balance going to the recorder. 

JN: What songs were those?

OF: I’m bad with titles. Something about King Edward’s Brother. I don’t remember the other one, but the very first song on Blood Money is the rough mix. 

That’s a very interesting story, too. 9/11 happened while we had some time off. The first session that we had was about a week after it happened. Tom said he was thinking about cancelling it, but if he did he would just be sitting in front of the TV getting more depressed, so we did the session. The mood was...you just feel his mood. He just projects it. Not that he’s intentionally being negative or whatever, but if he’s not in a good mood, you kind of just feel it. He came in, the mood was really heavy and says “I want to put a hand drum on Misery’s the River of the World and then I want you to give it a good rough mix.” Meaning I got to spend more than 15 minutes getting a balance. I spent two or three hours getting a decent rough mix. When it came time to mix those records, he was very concerned that those two albums were going to sound the same because they were all done in the same studio with the same musicians and the same production team. So he brought this other engineer up from LA to mix Blood Money. They did about three or four mixes of Misery is the River of the World, but he always went back and he ended up using that rough mix. I think it’s not because it’s such a brilliant mix but because there was something about the mood in the studio at the time. If you listen to the song, it’s kind of appropriate for a 9/11 aftermoment. 

JN: What do you remember about the album’s release? 

OF: Even though CDs were prevalent, everything inside the studio was an analog world. Like, I didn’t know how to use Pro Tools. It wasn’t a common thing. From what I remember, everyone always did both. Major releases still pressed to vinyl and CD. 

Tom loved all the songs that we had but there were too many of them. He had hoped to make it a double album, but the record company was shy about that because it was his first record on Epitaph. They felt like it was much harder to market a double album. Some of the songs that were chosen were at the mastering session. It went up to that last minute. I really loved Lowside of the Road, which I was less involved with. I really lobbied hard for that to be on the record. It came close to not being on the record. 

[simonjadis]

Anon I’m ASSUMING that these are from the same person; apologies if they are not

I would say that my feelings are similar to yours, but not quite identical ...

Disney’s handling has been imperfect, and some of the mistakes have been made the highest level (I know that people give Kathleen Kennedy a hard time, but if rumor is to be believed, some of the interference that made IX kind of weird came from higher than that)

for example, Kennedy said in an interview that she tries to find people who just make big, successful movies to make sure that these are also big, successful movies. I can understand that as being a safe bet from a business stand point, but that’s not the same thing as finding someone passionate about very specifically telling good, new Star Wars stories, which we did not really get in the Sequel Trilogy

(one of the most common theories that I saw from TLJ apologists was that people didn’t like that it was new/different than what they were expecting, which was really not the issue for me or my friends. Also it was just a speedrun of parts of Episodes V and VI)

I think that I’m “too close” to Star Wars to see it as a financial asset rather than a beloved universe full of characters and stories that I adore, but I don’t think that “literally just rehash the Original Trilogy for two movies and barely acknowledge any other part of Star Wars until IX” was a good idea

Rey deserved her own story. and Luke deserved to not be retroactively robbed of his

as for George Lucas, I do think that years of backlash over the Prequels sucked the fun out of it for him. Also, who doesn’t want four billion dollars? it was a sweetheart deal for Disney, of course

the sad thing is that this meant the end of Clone Wars, because Disney took one look at Lucasfilm’s budget and was like “OH NO YOU CANNOT SPEND THAT KIND OF MONEY ON A CARTOON” which is why Season 6 was paid for by Netflix and why Maul: Son of Dathomir was a comic

I love Star Wars Rebels and I’m not trying to knock the show at all, but the budgetary difference was palpable. Clone Wars did have it a little easier because of the Clone Troopers (all having the same face), but on Rebels, you notice that 90% of the Imperials are the same guy wearing a hat with his visor obscuring most of his face. market scenes show just a few people (but plenty of Storm Troopers)

the designs of the main characters -- Ezra, Hera, Sabine, Zeb, Kallus, Thrawn, Kanan, etc -- are great and loving and detailed and most of those change a little over time, but there’s a reason that we only see so many planets on Rebels. look at the huge armies and crowds in Rebels. my friend @drunkkenobi​ is the first who pointed out to me that in Clone Wars, you sometimes see lines of ships (Space Traffic) and each ship in line will be unique, distinct from the others

it’s not Rebels’ fault that they didn’t have that kind of budget. that’s also why their space battles (and space ships) never quite look right. meanwhile, for Clone Wars, if they wanted a particular scene or ship that went over their planned budget, all that they had to do was ask Uncle George

eccentric billionaires funding expensive media isn’t necessarily the most sustainable model for storytelling, but it sure worked out well for Clone Wars and for The Expanse

(Jeff Bezos personally called up the head of Amazon Prime programming, who had already been considering acquiring the extremely good but expensive show, and was like “hey the cast from this show is at a thing where I am, I’d love to just tell them that their show is saved, give me it?” and we saw as many new locations in Season 4 as we did in the first three seasons)

but streaming -- where you actually get money directly from customers who then, through their activity on your platform, show you exactly what they want to see aka what is keeping them on your platform -- offers a new opportunity for high quality genre media. remember, scifi and fantasy were EVERYWHERE in the ‘90s and the early aughts, and then because too expensive for regular TV unless they had huge audiences. only through streaming do we have these new Star Treks, The Witcher, and the real possibility of a new Stargate series

why do I bring up streaming? because

The Mandalorian goes to show that Disney can 100% do good Star Wars. Rebels was good, despite its budget, but can you imagine how much better it would have been if it had aired on Disney+

as with the DC movies (three of which are good and I’m also excited for Birds of Prey), the solution to the our-movies-made-a-lot-of-money-but-aren’t-strictly-speaking-good is literally just “let the people who do the cartoons make the movies”

and now we’re getting a final, seventh (half) season of Clone Wars! twelve episodes looking better than the show has ever looked!!

if you’re like me, you probably thought to yourself “gee, only 12?” and, cynically, you figured that it’s a trick -- announced at ComicCon in 2018 to build up the first wave of hype for Disney+

and it is ... but it 100% worked on me, I signed up for Disney+ and will pay anything for Clone War

my HOPE is that this is a test run to see if people really like high-quality animated Star Wars stories enough to continue with it. there’s only so much clone wars that one can cover (my suspicion is that we will see Ahsoka fake her death during Order 66 in these eps, so yep, that’s the end of the Clone Wars right there)

imagine a well-written series with everything that Clone Wars had in terms of content and visual quality, but it’s set after Episode IX. to my frustration, IX ends with effectively the same worldstate as VI which essentially means that nothing much happened in the Sequel Trilogy. but imagine a series set after IX. we could see a new set of (Force-wielding) characters. we could see Rey, Finn, Poe, and Rose during some episodes. Rose could finally get to do something that’s not an insulting fool’s errand (she deserves so much better!!!!!)

we don’t need a new Big Scary Empire/First Order thing, just organized crime and pirates and Hutts and bounty hunters and individual planet systems going to war as the characters try to assemble a NEW New Republic (gods I hate the unchanged worldstate)

now, I know that Star Wars Resistance is not ... reassuring. this is the only screencap that I have from it because I couldn’t get into it. it’s not the animation (I enjoyed Tron Uprising and Iron Man: Armored Adventures and this is the same kind of deal), but three things:

-I watch Star Wars for the Force primarily; other stuff can be cool but I need the Force

-I will never care about ships racing and really I don’t care about an individual ship flying; I’m a Command Ship kind of space nerd

-apparently the writing doesn’t improve much during the first season. people tell the main character to not do something, then he does it, and disaster ensues. that’s ... it’s fine, it’s fine to exist as a show, it’s just not for me

obviously, not all Star Wars media is for me, but when something -- like TLJ or the Sequel Series as a whole (even though VII and IX are enjoyable) or Resistance -- disappoints me, I would never accuse it of “ruining Star Wars”

Star Wars is a whole franchise. the breadth of canon isn’t all wiped away by some disappointments. was the MCU ruined by Age of Ultron? no. it was a bad movie but from the same franchise that gave us The Winter Soldier and Thor Ragnarok. hell, Dawn of Justice doesn’t “ruin” Wonder Woman or Aquaman or Shazam. bad movies aren’t contagious

for the past several years, the Entitled Dude crowd has felt empowered. they were radicalized in the altright/redpill/MGTOW/meninist/nazi/gamergate/comicsgate/etc spheres of the internet and now they just have a reflex where they see any sort of representation and decry it as “SJW,” which they also seem to think is a bad thing

in the same way that well-meaning people on tumblr can get radicalized into being antis/puriteens, people with certain vulnerabilities on reddit or youtube can get sucked into a world that tells them that they are the default and that other people existing is “political” in media and in real life, and that people being upset by outright cruelty towards them is both funny and means that the cruel person is the victor. they need therapy and studios need to not listen to them

unfortunately, sometimes there are movies that are bad despite having things like solid representation. Ghostbusters 2016 was a delight, but my friends and I with whom I saw TLJ (all of us queer feminists) left the theater angry. we’ve bitten our tongues a lot (even if it seems otherwise) because publicly criticizing the film too often leads some incel monster to chime in with agreement, and we’re just like

the redpillgate crowed et all is a natural ally of conservative white evangelicals, even though the former group is generally made up of New Atheists (the short version is atheists who hold socially conservative views because racism/misogyny/transphobia benefit them without using christianity as an excuse). it’s kind of like how terfs will side with conservative hate groups because, though they’re natural enemies, they both despite trans people just for existing

unfortunately, when you’re looking at who went to see a movie or who hated it, not everyone posts with an ID card saying exactly their demographic. which is only going to make studios like Disney even more nervous about including queer content in Star Wars and in the MCU (I mean real queer content with characters whose names don’t have to be searched on a wiki)

that was a bit of a tangent, but yeah. sorry if I missed anything

#star wars #clone wars #anon #ask #anon ask

[verecunda]

Books - January 2020

I love babbling about books, and I always keep meaning to keep up some sort of record of the ones I’ve been reading. So let’s start now!  Watch me completely fail to keep this up for the rest of the year hohoho

Eagle’s Honour - Rosemary Sutcliff

A volume of two little novelettes set in Roman Britain, displaying Sutcliff’s usual mastery of atmosphere and characterisation (though obviously not to the scale of her full-length novels). A Circlet of Oak Leaves is a rather sad story about loss, bitterness, resentment, and the cost of living a lie. Eagle’s Egg, on the other hand, is a very nice one which somehow mixes a sweet romance with Agricola’s Caledonian campaigns (ikr?!), and features a hero who manages to quell a mutiny by - in his words - making a bad joke at the right moment. (Quintus is My Kinda Guy! <3)

Some Must Watch - Ethel Lina White (aka The Spiral Staircase)

A rare case of the film being better than the book! I nearly put this down after the first few chapters, as the dry, expository style was pretty awkward. There was a lot of “Little did she know that this seemingly innocuous incident would be Really Important later…” which had the effect of defusing the tension, rather the heightening it, and depriving the reader of the fun of trying to pick out the real clues from the red herrings.

It’s also been a long time since I’ve read a book so thoroughly hostile to its female cast. Of course I try to take a book as a product of its time, but even for the ’30s, the misogyny felt overwhelming. The female characters are despised for being pretty or ugly, stupid or clever, flirty or frigid, young or old… (Somehow this sort of thing is even more depressing when it’s a female author.) The only exception, as far as the narrative voice is concerned, is the protagonist herself, who I guess is supposed to occupy some sort of happy medium, but unfortunately this reader found her irritating as hell, and a shining example of Too Stupid To Live. (Honestly, until now I would never have imagined that making a female protagonist literally voiceless could ever be an improvement on the source material, but somehow The Spiral Staircase managed.) *sigh* There’s no winning sometimes.

Swallows in the Spring - Rosemary Sutcliff (short story)

Another atmospheric short story, this time centred on two veterans of the Ninth Legion after its disappearance (picking up the idea Marcus posits in EOTN that there must have been some of the legion who didn’t march north that last time for one reason or another). Short, but haunting. I’d say both it and Eagle’s Egg are worth checking out for fans of Eagle of the Ninth, as both add a bit to the lore of the Hispana’s story in the Sutcliff!verse.

The Boy with the Bronze Axe - Kathleen Fidler

This is regarded as a bit of a children’s classic, and it’s one I’ve kept meaning to read for years. Now that I have... eh. :\

If you’re looking for something that sets out to recreate daily life in the Neolithic, you could hardly do better. The book is rich in detail, and you get a real sense of Stone Age people's resourcefulness at feeding, dressing, ornamenting, arming, and indulging themselves from the natural world around them (absolutely nothing was wasted!). Hunting and farming techniques are described, and rituals and ceremonies recreated from the existing monuments and artefacts we still have.

But apart from that, character development is basically nil. By the end of the book, I found myself rather sympathising with the couple of designated bad guys who were sick of Tenko the Bronze Age Gary Stu. A lot of the dialogue is stiff and stilted, and some sections - like the blow-by-blow description of floating a tree out of a cave at high water - made my eyes glaze over. I can’t really criticise a book for following the accepted archaeological theories of the time it was written, so I won’t, but even then there were still some things that made the head tilt. Even accepting the idea that Orkney at this time was remote and cut-off from mainland Britain, it was hard to believe that the people of Skara could have next to no knowledge of what was going on in the other islands. Some of those straits between them are very narrow indeed, and would have been easily navigable in a small hide boat. I’d say this is probably a book I would’ve enjoyed much more if I’d actually read it when I was a kid - only I remember finding another Fidler book, The Desperate Journey, pretty dull when I read it in primary school, despite the subject matter being extremely relevant to my interests, so I think I’m just plain not a fan.

The Fugitives - Rosemary Sutcliff (short story)

Another short, evocative little slice-of-Roman-life. It’s quite like EOTN in the respect that the protagonist, Lucian, is a young boy who has been physically disabled and is only just coming round to the acceptance that his life is going to have to take a different course than planned. (His father is Pilus Prior of a legion. ’Nuff said.) I felt the thematic link between Lucian and the deserter he ends up helping was actually pretty tenuous, but the characters themselves were all pretty engaging, especially the friendly young centurion who heads the search party. He reminded me a bit of Flavius from The Silver Branch. :)

Wandering Ghosts - Francis Marion Crawford

I’d already two of the stories in this collection - The Upper Berth and The Screaming Skull - but I enjoyed them so much I read the whole thing. They’re definitely the best of the bunch (The Upper Berth is, I gather, supposed to be Crawford’s best one, but for my money The Screaming Skull is even better), but I also really liked Man Overboard! and For the Blood is the Life. Crawford has a deft hand at mixing menace and humour (a bit like M.R. James in that regard), and a lot of the stories here have a very nautical character, which obviously pleased me. :) The only one I’m not crazy about was By the Waters of Paradise, which started off great, meandered on for a good long while, then just sort of... puttered out.

Winter Tales - George Mackay Brown

Weirdly enough, though I’ve read several of GMB’s novels and short stories, this is is actually the first full anthology of his that I’ve read. He’s always a delight to read for the beauty of his prose alone, and these stories are no exception. As always, he’s at his very best when he’s describing the rhythms of Orkney life, whether that’s in the 11th, 18th, or 20th centuries, and his sense of place and character is always gorgeous.

As is the way with anthologies, some of the stories I loved, others didn’t do much for me. My favourites from this collection are The Paraffin Lamp, The Woodcarver, and The Fight in the Plough and Ox (possibly because they were the most humorous?). I also have to give a shout-out to Lieutenant Bligh and Two Midshipmen for its thoughtful characterisation of William Bligh.

There’s a lot of overtly Christian symbolism throughout the stories, though it never quite matches the lyrical, meditative power of his novel Magnus, which meant quite a few of the stories left this stone-cold heathen going, “So… what was the point of that, then?” That said, I very much enjoyed his modern AU take on the parable in The Road to Emmaus. There’s a section in Magnus where he does something very similar, describing the civil war between the two earls almost as if it were a BBC report from a modern warzone, and it was an interesting echo of that. (I’m not sure which one was written first.)

#books what I'm reading

[someguyscaliforniavoterguide]

Select L.A. County/California Races, March 3, 2020

Hi friends, it’s me again. I am here to offer my opinions on how you should vote. As before I am up front about my biases: I am a Warren supporter, I live in L.A. and I am actively pro-density (Yay SB50, you deserved better) and pro-transit. I live in the east Valley, so I tend to focus more closely on the issues that directly impact my side of town, though I try to keep an ear out on things countywide. 

Last time I did this a couple of folks reached out to give me gifts to say thanks for doing this guide. This year, I would encourage anybody who wants to say thanks to donate $5 to Fair Fight,  a group founded by Stacey Abrams to fight voter suppression in the 2020 election. We’re gonna need all the help we can get in November to defeat the GOP, and Abrams is doing it in a smart way. 

Other voting guides

This is my voting guide and reflects my general opinion on things. However, I am indebeted to many other guides, including the Knock L.A. Voter Guide and the L.A. Podcast Voter Guide for their takes. I don’t always agree with them, but both of these are invaluable resources for the progressive voter in Los Angeles. 

L.A. City Council 

This year the even numbered seats are up for re-election. Half of them are effectively uncontested, a couple are very much contested, and two are free for all because of term limits. 

CD2: Ayinde Jones

Look none of these candidates set my heart afire. I work with Councilmember Krekorian’s office a lot (remember, I live in the east Valley) and he’s a competent politician with a ton of endorsements and community ties, I have no illusion he’s going to win his full term comfortably on March 3. However, I believe it’s good to encourage competition, and Ayinde Jones did a good (not great) job at the candidate forum I attended hitting on themes of how the parts of CD2 north of Victory are being left behind as the area evolves. I wish he were better on S50, but then again all three candidates were opposed, so that’s kind of a wash. I look forward to hearing more from Jones in the future. 

CD4: Sarah Kate Levy

From a paucity of options to a surplus of options next door. CD4 is currently represented by David Ryu, a politician who came out of the Neighborhood Council system and went on to become...a city hall politician. Both his opponents are great. Nithya Raman is the founder of SELAH, a group that does amazing work helping the unhoused in Los Angeles, and recently led Times Up! Hollywood for a year. I’d vote for her in a heartbeat, but I am encouraging people to vote for Sarah Kate Levy for two reasons: first, Levy is unabashedly supportive of SB50 and we need this kind of leadership, and second I am hoping these two excellent women will get so many votes that they overwhelm Ryu and leave him in third place. Fingers crossed. 

CD6: Bill Haller 

This is another shoo-in. Nury Martinez is the City Council president and has the backing of the County party and all the local clubs. I am endorsing Bill Haller because he supports an agenda that includes more public funding for affordable housing, more and better transit, and climate justice.  

CD8: Marqueece Harris-Dawson 

There are no other candidates in this race, so congratulations on your re-election Councilmember Harris-Dawson. 

CD10: Aura Vasquez 

This is an open seat, and the smart money has Mark Ridley-Thomas as the frontrunner. Ridley-Thomas is a current member of the L.A. County Board of Supervisors (more on them later) who is termed out of that position. I’m endorsing Aura Vasquez, a progressive activist with ties to Mid-City who has served as a commissioner for LADWP and led fights for renewable energy, banning single use plastics, and housing affordability in her community. 

CD12: Loraine Lundquist 

Dr. Lundquist rules. She takes public transit to debates, she is an honest to goodness scientist, and she nearly beat a Republican in what is the most conservative district in L.A. during a special election. I have donated money to this lady because we need to win this one. Her opponent, John Lee, wasted no time in trying to block housing for the homeless in his district and in attacking a successful safer streets project on Reseda Blvd. The city has a chance - a really great chance thanks to the realigned municipal elections - to toss out the worst possible councilmember in favor of the most progressive voice, don’t mess it up. 

CD14: Cyndi Otteson

This race is Kevin de Léon’s to lose, but he won’t commit to serving a full term since he really wants to be mayor. I say let him have his spare time to run for mayor and select Ms. Otteson, a grassroots activist who has the support of the UTLA and who is the only voice in favor of the Colorado Blvd alignment of the NoHo to Pasadena BRT project. Transit equity matters, and Ms. Otteson deserves your vote this March. 

LAUSD School Board 

Deferring to the teachers’ endorsements on this one. 

Board Seat 1: George McKenna

Board Seat 3: Scott Schmerlson

Board Seat 5: Jackie Goldberg

Board Seat 7: Patricia Castellanos

Glendale City Council: Dan Brotman 

An environmental activist with progresive views, Brotman will be a useful voice in Glendale’s city hall. 

District Attorney: Rachel Rossi 

George Gascón and Rachel Rossi will both be light years better than the current county D.A., Jackie Lacey. Both have promised to make substantial reforms in the office. I am really torn on this one, since I think Gascón’s experience as a Deputy DA in San Francisco is a big deal, and since he has the backing of the County Party. I am endorsing Rossi in a tilt-at-windmills hope that somehow she and Gascón make it to the final ballot in November and give us a thoughtful debate between a career prosecutor bent on reform and a public defender whose goal is reform about methods and ideas. Anyway, don’t vote for Jackie Lacey is all I am saying here. 

Superior Court

Voting for judges is stupid. We shouldn’t be doing this, but since we have to, I’ll make some suggestions. My math is based on other progressive endorsements, Party endorsements, and reverse-engineering some well known conservative voting guides to, if nothing else, make sure I am not voting for their endorsement. 

Office 17: Shannon Kathleen Cooley (the race is uncontested) 

Office 42: Linda Sun

Office 72: Myanna Dellinger

Office 76: Emily Cole (Cole is a prosecutor, but her opponent is a man who literally changed his name to “Judge” after serving as a judge in Stanislaus County) 

Office 80: Klint James McKay

Currently an administrative law judge, he impressed Public Defender Union representatives with his thoughtful and articulate answers to their questioning.

Office 97: Sherry L. Powell (Powell’s opponent ran as a conservative Republican for state assembly in 2018, this is a defensive vote)

Office 129: Kenneth Fuller

Office 131: Michelle Kelley (the race is uncontested)

Office 141: Lana Kim (the race is uncontested)

Office 145: Troy Slaten (Slaten’s opponent has a troubling history of misconduct and should not be elected to a judgeship) 

Office 150: Tom Parsekian

Office 162: David D. Diamond

L.A. County Board of Supervisors

The Supervisors oversee policy for the County, including all unincorporated areas, the LASD, County Health services, etc. For a county of TEN MILLION PEOPLE, there are only five supervisors, so they have a hugely outsized influence. 

Seat 2: Jorge Nuno 

A lot of progressives are endorsing Holly Mitchell in this seat. Me, I just can’t go there when she’s speaking at events for Livable California and when she gave a floor speech opposing SB50. Though he’s the front runner, Herb Wesson doesn’t deserve your vote - he was City Council president when the homelessness crisis exploded and he’s done little to address it. Nuno is a progressive and has an ambitious platform. 

Seat 4: Janice Hahn 

She’s solid, and nobody’s pushing her from the left. 

Seat 5: John Harabedian 

Kathryn Barger, the incumbent, is a Republican who supports Trump’s immigration policies. John Harabedian is a solidly Center Left Democrat who has the backing of the county party and who could, in this presidential election year, win an upset in what is traditionally a Republican stronghold of L.A. County. Vote for him. 

County Ballot Measures

Measure R: YES YES YES 

This will provide crucial tools to the already existing civilian oversight committee for the LASD, including subpoena powers. It also requires the commission to study ways to divert offenders from jail. You need to vote yes on this. 

State Ballot Measures 

Prop 13: Yes

$15B in bonds to invest in public schools and “local control” to allow local school districts to issue larger bonds. The only real opposition is from the Howard Jarvis Taxpayers Association, a revanchist organization that is singlehandedly responsible for much of our state and local problems in the past few decades. Don’t listen to them. 

Congressional Elections 

Despite some misgivings, I am generally supporting the progressive challengers here to hopefully lead to a Progressive/Center Left election in the fall. 

CD 25: Christy Smith 

She has a good track record in the state assembly and a strong local support network. She’s not a carpetbagger with a YouTube show, and she’s not a Republican. 

CD 28: Adam Schiff 

He’s not the most progressive guy in Congress but he’s been critical to holding Trump accountable. He’s earned this vote. 

CD 29: Angelica Duenas 

Tony Cardenas is a bit of a non-entity on the national stage but he does good local work and he was an early vote in favor of impeachment. The rape allegations against him which troubled me last time were dismissed with prejudice in 2019. Cardenas has a progressive challenger, Angelica Marie Duenas, who has run in the past as a Green Party candidate. I don’t trust her decision to abandon that label and come into the Democrats after getting drubbed in 2018, but overall I like her ideas and I’d be happy to see her and Cardenas in a runoff this year. 

CD 30: CJ Berina 

Brad Sherman is an okay Congressmember. CJ Berina is a young, progressive challenger who’s attracted the attention of the Sunrise Movement. I’d vote for him to try to push the GOP out of the runoff and make this a race between the Center Left and the Progressive Left. 

CD 34: Frances Yasmeen Motiwalla

Jimmy Gomez is solid; let’s push the GOP out of the runoff though by supporting this progressive. 

State House 

District 39: Luz Rivas

District 41: Chris Holden 

District 43: Laura Friedman 

District 44: Jacqui Irwin

District 45: Jesse Gabriel 

District 46: Adrin Nazarian

District 48: Blanca Rubio 

District 49: Edwin Chau 

District 50: Richard Bloom

District 51: Wendy Carillo

District 53: Godfrey Plata

District 54: Tracey Jones

District 55: Andrew Rodriguez

District 58: Margaret Villa

District 59: Reggie Jones-Sawyer

District 62: Autumn Burke

District 63: Anthony Rendon

District 64: Fatima Iqbal-Zubair

District 66: Al Muratsuchi

District 70: Patrick O’Donnell

State Senate

SD 21: Kipp Mueller

SD 23: Abigail Medina

SD 25: No Endorsement - I rarely do this but honestly Anthony Portantino does not deserve your vote. Write in Mickey Mouse. 

SD 27: Henry Stern

SD 29: Josh Newman

SD 31: Richard Roth

SD 33: Lena Gonzalez

SD 35: Steven Bradford

County Committees 

Look this is getting waaaaaaaaaaaaaay into the weeds. What I am going to say is this: I know that a lot of “progressive” slates are out there and I encourage you to try your best to vet them. In my district, one of the candidates is somebody I know personally - she actively campaigned for Jill Stein, she circulated the decades-old “Clinton Death List” to voters, and she pushed Pizzagate theories. I am not voting for this person, but she is endorsed by “Progressive California” so...just be careful. 

[gold-from-straw]

Writing Ask Game

A little while ago I was tagged by @stardustloki to answer these questions about fanfic, and decided they'd be quite good questions to write about my original stuff as well, so here you go! (Some questions were deleted because I gave the same answers, or because they weren’t relevant to original stuff)

At what age did you start writing?

I think ALL children write stories at some point or another when they're very young, but the first story I remember finishing (that wasn't for school) was about two stowaways on a big tanker ship who find a girl who's been living in the bowels of the ship, sneaking around and making her home in the hidden corners where nobody can find her. I think I was 14 or so when I wrote it, and I can't remember how it ended - and it's one I don't have any more because I used to hand my stories around school and it sort of never came back to me!

What is your favorite book?

Oh god… OK, I can’t choose just one! So here’s a bunch! Radio Silence by Alice Oseman, I just love literally everything about this story, and I can't really talk about my favourite part without spoiling a major plot point. But Aled Last deserves the world, and Francis' mum is the mum I want to be - she supports her daughter, and even helps her in a way that literally never happens in YA books! You SO RARELY get a parent helping their child against another adult, but they SHOULD.

Also The Trees, by Ali Shaw, which is wonderful and creepy and disturbing. And The Gentleman's Guide to Vice and Virtue by Makenzie Lee, which is sweet and bonkers. And Marian Keyes' books - This Charming Man was traumatic and I can't read it again BUT it was SO clever and I loved the resolution - women working together ftw! Things by Kate Atkinson are always brilliant but I can't choose a favourite, and also anything in the Discworld series! OK, I'm going to stop now, or it'll get silly...

What stories do you avoid like the plague?

I can't watch horror movies, and I find creepy books very hard to deal with as well. The pictures in Miss Peregrine's School for Peculiar Children was about my limit, and without the story that went with them I think I would have had nightmares! I've tried reading Mills and Boon books but I found it REALLY hard to believe in the romance at all, it was like they ended up together because... reasons? But one of them had the guy allow this girl to believe that Tara was his wife back at home, she got insanely jealous and really bitchy (like dude... you're not even together, chill?) and then it turns out Tara was his dog. Why? Why would you do that to each other? Do you LIKE each other? Are you SURE??

Ahem.

(Read Elegance by Kathleen Tessaro instead. Their relationship was cute. Or If You Could See Me Now by Cecelia Ahern! So cute!)

I also tend to avoid those books about abused children. Triggery!

What story do you wish to write but feel like you won’t manage?

I have SO MANY novel ideas, and I'm really precious about most of them (I WILL get to them, just... it takes me a while, OK?!) But one book that I've wanted to write and been too scared to attempt is called Morningstar. It's actually inspired by a fanfic I wrote where Loki and Jesus are good friends (and no, it's not religion bashing, I may be a pagan but I think Jesus is a pretty great character) called Happy Birthday, Jesus! (It was written on Christmas Eve, and it's really silly and fluffy!)

The thing is, I wanted to write a prequel about how they became friends. And then I ended up going to church with a friend and reading the bible (it was a book and it was RIGHT THERE don't judge me) and noticing a lot of references to punishing the children of the devil for the actions of their father. Distressing, for a start, but also reminded me of the Lokasenna.

So it turned into an idea where Lucifer decides to come and visit this so-called Son of God, and finds him at age 13, when he's annoying the hell out of all the priests by being a little too well-informed. Lucifer joins in and spreads discord and actually quite likes the kid, and over the years, he keeps in touch with him. Then, when Jesus is an adult, Lucifer's children are killed, and he's trapped (similar to how Loki was, with the snake venom) and Jesus comes to help him get out. Lucifer starts hanging around with the disciples. He annoys the absolute hell out of Peter for laughs, because Peter's really pious, he gets on really well with Mary Magdalene and Levi, the ex-tax collector. Jesus is just kind and happy to everyone, and while he listens to Lucifer ranting, he always argues with him - they just never let their very opposing views get in the way of their friendship. When Jesus goes out into the desert, Lucifer tempts him because he's worried about him, and angry, and eventually Jesus tells him to leave him alone because doing this is important to him.

It would change nothing about the story. Jesus still dies and is resurrected. It's just that Lucifer's around the whole time, being a twisty, sarcastic, bitchy arsehole, with fundamentally different views to Jesus, and still be his friend on a personal level. There would probably also be some natural disasters when Jesus dies.

However, I'm terrified of doing this story wrong! I would end up insulting a large group of people and aaahhhh! Maybe I'll write it when I'm an old woman and don't give two shits what people think of me any more...

What has been your favorite story to write so far?

Hmmm... probably Zero Degrees - it involved a lot more research than any of the others, because I decided to use references to so many different gods, but it was also one of the most visually creative things I've ever done! I was able to just go crazy, imagining dragons fighting giant spiders in a magical library, and rituals where the hair of a summer god is woven into gloves. It was so much fun! And I have no idea where most of it came from, but it made me realise I enjoy writing magic and magical realism way more than I thought I would!

On the other hand, The Forest Hotel is the only book I've ever written where it turned out pretty much how I wanted it to, practically on the first draft! I did like 7 edits anyway, but they weren't huge plot edits, more adding things in, and I'm still happy with how it turned out!

Why did you start writing? Why are you still writing?

…I really wanted to. That’s basically it? It seems like the more I write, the more ideas I get, and I love that feeling of creating something that I would want to read. These characters live in my head and I get to just peer into their world every now and again to see how they're doing, and it's just so enriching to me. I love it. I write because I want to, and I publish because it brings in a little bit of money and therefore justifies me writing a bit more ;)

Tagging anyone else who writes original fic! Off the top of my head I can think of @chronicintrovert , @focusdumbass, @deborah-writes, @luninosity, @nano-writer, @elizabethhollowswriting and @mosellegreen! If you also write original fic and I haven’t tagged you, please feel free to do this and tag me! I want to know!!

#original ramblings by Lyn H #Lyn's Writing #tag game #tag you're it #Zero Degrees #The Forest Hotel #morningstar #Book Recommendations

[wcnderfulrush]

*  Roleplay history

The rules are simple! Post ten characters you’d like to roleplay as, have role-played as, and might bring back. Then tag ten people to do the same (if you can’t think of ten characters, just write down however many you can and tag the same amount of people). Aside from that, please repost instead of reblogging!

— CURRENTLY PLAYING.

@wcnderfulrush | Kotori Minami / Love Live! - School Idol Project | Active

@youngbxker | Lillian Elise Marchand | Multiverse OC | Low Activity

@shymaidxn | Diantha / Granblue Fantasy (GBF) | Active

— WANT TO PLAY. 

GBF best friend OCs | Awhile ago a lot of people where making Captain OCs and a few of those types of blogs popped up. I plan on giving Kotori a GBF verse, but I also wanted a multitude of GBF OCs. Maybe as a small crew in of itself, or a small group that joins the Grandcypher; I haven’t decided which yet, nor exactly how many OCs I want to make in this group (there’s at least 3-4 ideas in my head sooo).

Revue Starlight - Relive multimuse | I started playing this game when it first came out (and accidentally put money into it while I was too tired to function, which means I’m keeping it forever now) and I got real interested in some of the characters. Most notably Tamao, Aruru, Hikari, Nana, and recently Junna and Maya have become a bit more interesting to me. I haven’t watched the anime, so I want to watch that first before I make a huge decision / take on so many characters.

Idolmaster multimuse | This is an idea I’ve grappled with for awhile. After I watched the CG anime I loved Uzuki and Kirari, after starting deresute I loved Yuka, Kanna, and Kumiko, after watching SideM and starting msute I loved Shiki, Hayato, Touma, and Saki! If I really got into All Stars / Million Live again, I’d probably be in huge trouble with having too many people;; This right now feels like a lot of muses, but I love them all a lot and would maybe want to try it out?

FGO multimuse | I’ve been lacking in my play towards this game, but I still love some of the characters here! Nero, Da Vinci, Beni-enma, Chiron, Nursery Rhyme, Xuanzang Sanzang, Frankenstein, Nitocris, and the recently added Ganesha are the favs so far, though the blog would probably only start off with Nero, Nursery Rhyme, Fran, and Da Vinci; I need a better understanding of some of them, but some of them won’t come to EN for a bit...

Yuki Yuna / Yuki Yuna is a Hero | A character that I love from my fav magical girl anime! Simple as that lol

Maybe some of the girls from Magia Record when the EN version comes out (though i need to check when that is)

Enstars and A3 are getting animes, so oh dear you never know, I might love them...

A plethora of OCs I might want to make in the future for any reason / any fandom.

— HAVE PLAYED.

Aisling Dempsey | Ghost OC | hiatus ( but maybe collab Lillian book..........one day )

Kathleen O’Conner | Modern OC | erased from existence because she felt real mary sue and her blog gave me anxiety for some reason because of that?

Aya Maryama and Misaki Okusawa | Bang Dream - Girls Band Party | indefinite hiatus ( gonna make their blog one of those multimuses I mentioned; gonna get started on it after Tuesday because that’s when my stats class ends~).

Hanamaru Kunikida | Love Live! Sunshine!! | hiatus because...Aqours rp kind of makes me uncomfy after long-going incidents with a person I used to call my best friend. The rp stuff was on twitter rp and wasn’t directly pointed at me, but I played a small part in it because at first I thought it was just angst threads, but then it turned into...Some real bad jazz, to put it mildly. I love Hanamaru to bits, but I deleted my twitter rp accounts because being reminded of that stuff still gives me anxiety, and even dabbled with deleting her on here but I can’t really bring myself to since nothing happened with this Hanamaru, you know? As such, her blog has just kind of...Rotted in a corner, whoops. I still have all of her icons, so maybe I’ll go back to that blog one day...

Shizuku Osaka | Love Live! - Perfect Dream Project | hiatus because...I keep forgetting she exists gdjcgfhgjv. Took over Kathleen’s whole blog; I did it up and everything, and then I did no threads. Whenever SIFAS or a PDP anime comes out, I may be convinced to go on her blog and actively seek out threads there.

Abel | Lion OC | never had a blog, but literally my first muse on this place ( I rped through anon with this Edward Elric blog I found and popped in with both Abel and Lillian-prototype; that mun and I are friends on twitter and tumbr personals and occasionally strike up conversations still~). A fond memory, but also a tad cringe, but also the mun encouraged my writing and said it was really good, and that helped make the mun I am today~ *fireworks*. I thought about making him kinda like a shapeshifter with a zookeeper job, but as of this post nothing has happened outside of a few ideas.

STOLEN FROM. technically @sappines but this has been sitting in my drafts for so long;; TAGGING. Hey you? You like memes? Then go take this one!

#;prompts