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#also her actual life is a mess you'll discover soon ...
madeofcc · 2 years
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CHAPTER 5 : CANDY (part 1/3)
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[TRANSCRIPT]
WINDENBURG - NOW
We’re in Pr.Ridge’s office. He’s with a patient ...
RID : So … You really don't want to apply huh ?
??? : I don't think that's a good idea indeed … I mean, with all the things I told you about this place …(WE REALIZE THAT IT’S CANDY SPEAKING; SHE’S ADULT NOW )  I'm not sure I'll ever be able to put a foot in there anymore
RID : But you're a strong woman Candace right ?
CAN : I like to think so at least but this place doc …
RID : Don't you think it's time to let it go ?
CAN : What do you mean by that ?
RID : Maybe this mansion is just a way for you to stay in your position
CAN : How dare you ?! You know this place is responsible for my actual behaviour !
RID : Then, don't you think it could also be a way for you to … Clean your soul ?
CAN : You really think this would help me getting better ?
RID : I mean, we could at least give it a try don't you think ? When you'll see that this house is just an empty old building falling appart, nothing should stop you for pursuing your dreams right ? And you won't be there alone, there will be other students and patients of mine to keep you company.
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saphig-iawn · 5 months
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Day 11 of Turning me into Me
So in light of yesterday's writing, I discovered a shop that I would never have expected to see in my town. An actual witch shop. I think the owner was out to lunch when I went so I couldn't look inside but I really hope to go in there soon. While I don't practice I've felt great comfort and support around women who practice witchcraft. There is a comfort and warmth those people emanate that I can't help but find myself drawn to them. They present this defiance and nonconformity that resonates with me. I'm not sure if I'd ever practice practice, but there are enough rituals in my life that I probably do but don't realise it. I must admit that getting a cat has made me feel more comfortable in my home so perhaps I am a witch. I'm going to try and see if I can catch them open tomorrow. A good witch needs a good dress after all.
As I was writing this I saw a wonderful post by @mechacringegirl that I reblogged that really resonated with me, so I think its worth me writing about when I knew I was trans.
So like @mechacringegirl wrote, I didn't always know I was trans. I feel that there's an overriding narrative that there needs to be this felt incongruence between yourself and your self, but that wasn't me. 2018 was the year I realised I was trans, in that I had a label for it. The word transgender existed to me but I had a whole knotted bramble mess of feelings that made that label unknowingly inapplicable (which I'll explain later). What cracked my egg was two separated moments. The first was a dream. I came out to my girlfriend and she was so happy and supportive and she even named me in the dream. The second was playing the game Endless Legend. I was happily minding my own business until I encounter a minor faction within the game, the Sisters of Mercy. Righteous warrior women who champion the trampled and oppressed. The image of their leaders and their warriors just struck me so hard in my chest. I felt my chest compress, my heart expand. I felt so overwhelmed that I cried. When I look back now, they embodied so much of femininity that I wanted. This moment made me realise that my dream wasn't a one-off. It took me 3 months to tell my girlfriend about it. I was so terrified of losing her, but she was so supportive but she laughed at her dream self for naming me Tiffany (if you ever meet me, you'll see I'm not really a Tiffany kinda girl).
From then to now has been an incredible journey of introspection and reflection. There is so much to talk about, but I want to focus on that big bramble knot. I've met a few lovely girlies on here and we've talked about this and found kinship and appreciation for one another so I feel it only right that I share these feelings in here in the hopes that it finds someone like me when I was trying to wrestle with these feelings. In short:
I was terrified that my feelings about myself and my gender were a fetish.
During my teens, I discovered that sneaking on feminine clothing made me feel different. Arousal was a part of it, but the overwhelming feeling was one of it being forbidden, or wrong (btw young Saphi, that was gender euphoria you were feeling too!). That lead me to discover very powerful NSFW content that had all manner of transformations. Genderbending, dollification, dronification, bimbofication, it was all there when I was discovering this, and I got sucked right in. Every piece of content I absorbed I always found myself wanting to be the subject of them. I wanted to be the hapless dude who became a pretty woman in a dress, or a guy who wronged a witch and got cursed to become a doll. If the outcome was a woman, I wanted it. But the feelings I was feeling were so much more than arousal, there was a deep yearning in my heart and I just thought that was me being horny for that content. So as 2018 approached, I would flit between feeling I was not cis and also feeling that I was just a crossdresser or a force-fem fetishist. From 2018 onwards, I would inflict deep hurt on myself by twisting genuine feelings of gender euphoria as a fetishisation. But some time a year or so ago, I encountered an incredible post from a transwoman who struggled like I did.
She talked of how she was infatuated with genderbending and transgender erotic content. She would get aroused wearing fem clothes, she would incorporate genderbending into her sexual life. But then after a while she had something click deep within her. She realised that the reason she was consuming so much of this content and envisioning herself as being a part of it was because in that world, someone else was making the decision to transition for her. If she was strolling down the street as a guy and a witch magically turned her into a woman then it wasn't her 'fault'. She was exonerated of the consequences of becoming a woman. She could rock up to work and be all "You'll NEVER guess what happened!" and it would all be fine. I was dumbfounded... it all made sense now. Why I wanted to be a turned into a doll in one bit of content, or forced to be a cute cheerleader in another, it was someone else making the decision for me.
Now, that kind of content appeals to me for what it is, which is all about power dynamics and such. Ever since then, I have never doubted my transness, and it has helped me embrace the sexual nature of my new self with not even a pinch of shame.
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twoidiotwriters1 · 9 months
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Until The Very End -(WITS Sequel)
A/N: None of you bitches told me today was the 26th how am I supposed to know I have to post a new chapter Anyway, HAPPY 1000TH POST!! -Danny
Words: 2,301
Masterlist
Previous chapter // Next chapter Listen to: 'Photograph' -by Cody Fry
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2006
When Rose Granger-Weasley was born, they discovered Ron was the overprotective father of the whole lot. Not even Erick had acted that way with his babies. Hermione found it exasperating, but to Ron, that little girl was his firstborn, and nothing was going to stop him from keeping her safe.
If they were packed with children before, now it was definitely overwhelming. Fred had a good reason to be losing his mind over it, there was always a baby or a toddler he had to be mindful not to step on or sit on accident.
Regulus, who was the eldest child, hadn't changed much after his talk with Mel. He was a kid still, so she wasn't expecting him to change his behaviour, he was too young to grasp it all. However, he seemed a little bit uneasy about attending Hogwarts now.
Emily Flint, on the other hand, couldn't wait to go. She was determined to be as good as her father to the point of claiming she'd be a Headgirl too. She wanted to be in Slytherin like him, but Erick had advised her not to force herself into a house where she might not belong.
"You should let the hat do its work, love," He'd told her. "If you talk too soon, you'll be trapped in a house where you're not comfortable."
"Listen to your father, he should know," Mel teased him. "He became my friend out of boredom and before he knew it he was dragged into our mess."
"Yeah, worst decision of my life," he mused, kissing the top of his son's head, who was sound asleep in his arms.
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Matthew John Potter was born on January twelve, also known as Erick's birthday. Naturally, Mel and Harry asked him to be the godfather.
Erick was more than pleased, he was ready to take the boy under his wing and guide him through life. What that meant, no one knew, but Mel trusted he'd do a good job anyway.
Amy Flint was born in February of the same year, the fifth—and last of their babies, according to Anne and Erick.
Then, to everyone's surprise, Fred and Joseph decided to get married. It wasn't that they weren't expecting them to last, they'd been dating for almost a decade, but since they lived together and didn't seem to have any interest in getting married, it wasn't exactly anticipated.
Fred's wedding, in spite of what he'd promised when they were younger, was as elegant as any other, if not more. Joseph was firm on having the best of the best in every aspect, and Fred let him do his thing since he wasn't an expert at weddings.
"If it were for me, we'd just hire some bloke to marry us in our apartment and that'd be it, but Jo finds that, er, what did you call it, love? I just know it was a bad French insult to my person," he teased.
"You won't ruin my day, Weasley," Joseph replied unbothered. "I've been dreaming of this since our first year together."
"Wow, that's faith," Mel grinned.
"Oh, don't say that like you didn't dream about getting married to Glasses since you were a kid!" George exclaimed. "You probably talk to Harry once and you started to design the cake."
"She wanted me to be her best man, actually," Harry spoke from his place in the rug, he'd been playing with his twins quietly until that moment. They were starting to show signs of wanting to walk, so now they had to always be watching over them when they were awake. "She wanted to marry Prince William."
"What—"
"Thank you for that, Glasses," she groaned, falling back on the couch and hiding her face behind a cushion. "I'll never hear the end of it..."
"Blimey! Princess Mel of England—has a ring to it, lady."
"To think you almost got to be Lady Dumbledore for real!" Fred chortled.
"Shut up, you two," she scowled at the twins. "It was a nice thing to imagine as a child. Either way, when I first dated Harry, I don't remember thinking about a wedding. The most I would picture was Hogsmeade dates and holding hands in front of everyone once Skeeter left us alone..."
"Skeeter's no longer a problem now, is she?" George taunted her. "You guys are disgustingly sweet in public nowadays."
"Well, Georgie, being close to dying really changes your priorities," She joked.
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"Look at this one!" Mel laughed, handing the picture to Ginny. "Look how tiny we look next to Charlie!"
The redhead laughs as she looks at the photo Mel's showing her, it's from the 1994 summer, the year of the Quidditch final, before hell broke loose. "Sweet Merlin, look at Charlie's hair!"
They're looking for old pictures of Joe and Fred for the ceremony, and Mel's the only one who has pictures of the both of them at Hogwarts. Mel looks at the images and it's been so long since she sat and look through them, that now she's able to see how much they've changed. 
Her fourteen-year-old self smiles at them, waving enthusiastically at the camera from where she's standing behind the burrow's sofa. Sitting there are Fred and George, and they're scribbling something on parchment, probably the pricelist for his inventions. Her face is much rounder than it is nowadays, though, in a year's time, Mel knows that will change. 
The trauma and growth spurt are bound to sharpen her features, but she remains innocent and sweet in that photo, forever enjoying her summer with the Weasleys and Harry, the boy she has a crush on.
As she looks through the album she starts to think about Hogwarts again, and it amazes her just how much she'd almost forgotten. The spring days sitting under that huge tree by the lake, the late night studying with her friends in the common room, and how could she forget the meal times with Fred and George making her laugh until she choked on her pumpkin juice!
It was all so long ago... a whole decade of experiences and changes, and yet all those memories came back to her as easily as a spell. Her fingers grazed around the soft features of that young Mel, so full of life, with a soul so whole and bright she could take down dementors by just standing there—not quite true, but now it felt like that had been the case—and her eyes teared up a bit.
"Mel, what's the matter?" Ginny asked worryingly.
"Sorry," she sniffed, hastily cleaning her face. "I just... I remembered how young we were when we met—it's so strange... knowing we were once that little, and at some point, I just... forgot."
Ginny looked at her with a soft and understanding smile. "It is strange, isn't it? It's hard not to forget how it felt to be that small... especially someone like you, I guess, holding all that power... hard to believe you were once a little girl, right?"
Mel stared at the picture for a while. She didn't know how badly she loved that little girl until now, and she felt guilty when she thought of the times she'd been embarrassed to have been her. Why, when little Mel had been all that was good in the world? 
She looked at herself with the same eyes her Uncle Lu had at the end of her third year at school, what a remarkable little thing she was, with eyes so smart and clever she looked like she knew more than she let on. No wonder adults were always a little on edge when she was around.
A little girl's squeal brought her back and she looked up. Harry walked into the drawing room holding Emmie's hands as she marched into the room with clumsy feet. Luna walked right after them with James still safely tucked in her arms. 
"Look at her go!" Ginny said proudly. "Hang on, Harry, don't pick her up yet!" She reached for Mel's old camera on the coffee table and turned the baby and her father. "She looks so cute!"
Mel watched as her daughter moved across the room holding tightly to Harry's fingers. He had a huge smile on his face as he encouraged his daughter to keep walking, glancing at Mel from time to time to point Emmie in her direction.
The young mother slipped off the couch and knelt to receive the toddler in her arms, which only encouraged Emmeline to walk faster. Harry almost tripped trying to keep up. Mel laughed and held one hand out for her daughter. "Come along, love, you can do it!"
Ginny took the picture then, the moment Emmeline crashed against her mother's chest and Mel fell on her butt, laughing as much as the baby. Harry helped her to sit up, smiling proudly at his daughter's accomplishment. "She's got good legs," he grinned. "Might be a good climber just like you."
Mel laughed again, cupping her daughter's cheek and beaming. "As long as she learns to not fall on her head, then it's fine."
"Dad!" Emmeline squealed, reaching her chubby little arms to try and pull Harry closer, he sat next to Mel on the rug and kissed Emmie's head, brushing her hair back. 
"What's this?" He grabbed one of the pictures and smiled at it. "Look, Mel, Emmie looks so much like you here!"
He showed her the photo, it was them on her ninth birthday, with icing on her cheek and the roundest cheeks she'd ever seen on a little girl. Harry had one arm around her shoulders and his fingers had icing the same colour as the one on her face. Little Matthew had the same bright emerald eyes as him.
"Yeah she does," Mel beamed, holding onto the toddler and kissing the top of her head. "I hope she gets to be just as happy as I was, too."
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Once a month her mother, Remus and Tonks offered to look after the twins and Matthew so she and Harry could go out with Hermione and Ron. They left Rose with Ron's parents and left to spend a whole day in London.
First, they considered going to Diagon Alley, but they didn't want to risk finding Skeeter there, she'd been trying to get a glimpse of Rose and Matthew as well as the twins, and even though they didn't have the kids with them, they didn't want to be disturbed.
So instead, they walked around the muggle city and took Ron to the movies.
"Heard Professor Sprout is planning to retire," Hermione mentioned as she grabbed a fistful of popcorn. "Might be a good idea to mention it to Neville, don't you think?"
"Doesn't he have his own apothecary near his grandma's house?"
"Yeah, but his grandma's really old now, and I mean really old," Mel pointed out. "So it'd be a good idea for him and Hannah to start thinking about their future."
"Thinking about their future?" Ron made a face. "Not like their lives revolve around Neville's grandma..."
"Oh, you know Neville only lives so out of the way to be close to her," Hermione admitted with a sigh. "I agree with Mel, that's why I mentioned Professor's Sprout possible retirement. I think, Mel," she leaned forward and gave her a careful look. "That if you talk to her, she might consider writing to Neville to ask if he's interested."
"I don't know if I even need to do that," Mel shrugged. "He was one of her best students, maybe she's already considering him to fill the spot."
"Wouldn't hurt to make sure of it," Hermione insisted.
"Been years since we went to school and you still look after him," Ron teased her, though his voice was affectionate. "He's a grown man like all of us, Mione, he can do things himself if he wants to."
Hermione sighed and shook her head. "You're right. You're right. Sorry, it's just... sometimes I think I still see him as that little boy that used to hide behind us during potions."
Mel giggled, understanding her feelings. "Lately I've been thinking about our time in school as well... the other day I had this dream that I had fallen asleep and everyone had gone to class, but I couldn't find the classrooms, it was as if the entire castle had changed it's hallways and staircases, but I was sure they looked exactly the same, it was me who'd forgotten the directions... and then I looked at myself as I passed next to a window and saw myself in that old Gryffindor uniform?" She smiled. "It felt strange to be wearing it again, even if it was a dream."
"I don't miss wearing those stupid hats," Ron scoffed. "Or the ties..."
"The ties were lovely," Hermione argued. "I liked our winter cloaks and the scarfs were really thick and warm."
"I liked how you looked in your uniform," Harry told Mel with a grin. "Especially the Quidditch one."
Mel lightly hit his shoulder and he laughed, she shook her head. "Isn't it weird that next year Regulus will attend Hogwarts? He'll be part of a house, and use the same uniform, and he'll go to the same classes we did, but it won't be like our time there at all."
"He's definitely a Gryffindor, though," Ron added.
"Yeah," responded the other three.
"I think that makes it just as exciting for us as it will be for him," Hermione said, smiling giddily. "Everything will be new to us in a way."
"Yeah, a first year with no three-headed dogs and giant games of chess," Ron smirked. "We never got to know what that was like."
"We should get him an owl for his eleventh birthday," Mel nudged Harry's arm. "He's got Padfoot, so I don't think a cat's a good idea."
"Padfoot gets along with Grey just fine," he frowned.
"Grey's an old cat, he's too tired to fight him," Mel replied humorously. "A young cat would most likely try to murder Padfoot and Padfoot would probably sit on them until they suffocated."
Harry laughed. "Fine, an owl it is."
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themovieblogonline · 2 years
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heyitsmerose · 3 years
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Russian Roulette | Mafia!Seonghwa
Pairing: Mafia!Seonghwa x Assassin/Sniper!Reader
Genre: Angst, Mafia!
Word Count: 11.2k
Summary: A part of the infamous Park gang, your life is never short of crazy. You've never met the man himself, but tonight something is different. He accompanies the rest of the gang to one of your usual Friday night outs. It all goes south however, as you discover the night doesn't turn out as it's supposed to, a dangerous obstacle in your way. You are forced to pick between the lives of your boss, your best friends and young boy in a menacing game of Russian Roulette.
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Warnings/Disclaimer: I am aware the Mafia life is nothing like I am portraying it. It is definitely not full of attractive, young, single people and many nasty/dirty things happen behind the scenes. Furthermore this is quite a serious topic as some people lose their lives over this. I will not be portraying the reality of mafia gangs, instead just an idealised version (thus remember, none of this is real). That being said, a little imagination and creativity never hurt anyone did it? Also this is my second SeonghwaxMafia fic oops.
Blood + Wounds
Mafia + Gangs
Guns + Weapons
Underage Drinking + Assault
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Youtube Playlist
1:55  ───|────── 4:45
|◁              II             ▷| *I've spent a few weeks on this, I'm sorry if there are spelling errors, I've read the entire thing maybe 5-6 times.
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Friday. 6 pm. After-work hours. What were you doing? What every other normal friend group would do; go to the nearby bar to relax. Except you weren't normal. You and 14 or so others in the bar at the moment, had a dirty secret. You were a part of a gang, a mafia gang to be exact. In all honesty, unlike the movies or stories that had portrayed them, the public rarely knew about mafia gangs, let alone knew if they existed. You could roam around freely without the need to worry about someone recognizing you. No one would know that such a pretty face hid such a dark secret.
Besides, this was your lifestyle now. You knew the gang was political and focused on some power struggle but you couldn't care less. Frankly, the only reason you joined the gang was that you were broke. You were introduced to it after you stumbled into this exact bar at the age of 16, wanting to become a bartender as you knew it paid well. You tried applying for the job but it turned out you were underage and couldn't work at the bar yet. While you were slapped by reality, however, someone was watching your every move. She was young too, maybe 15 or 16 and she had noticed you the moment you entered the bar/club. Not too many new people came along so she was intrigued. Immediately when she sensed your aura and your personality, she knew you'd fit in well with the gang.
She noticed how confidently you carried yourself and noticed your dark fashion choice. She stared as you made your way to the counter, swaying your hips as you got the attention of the bartender. The way, you leaned against the counter cooly, your lips parted slightly as you waited for a response. As she kept looking at you you looked back, feeling someone glare holes into the back of your skull. You noticed a young girl, hair a burgundy color with full black clothes. She smiled at you softly and you only raised your eyebrows before rolling your eyes and averting eye contact. What a badass personality you had. Perfect.
Despite really wanting a friend in the gang, and wanting to recommend you to the boss, she couldn't. Alas, she was only a young hacker and her position was not too significant. What she didn't expect was for you to come up to the group yourself, and introduce yourself. You got your response from the manager, and it was not one you were too happy with, you scoffed and turned on your heel, looking for a way to better your situation and rotten mood. She picked up her drink and gulped it down after you looked away. She looked back at you and you were gone. Her eyes widened as she sighed. She knew you'd get along but she was never going to see you again. The last thing she expected was to hear a voice from near the central table.
"Listen up people. Is this some sort of badass, thug gig? Are yall hiring? Can I be a part of this?" You announced. She spat out her drink and choked, hearing your words. Not only were you an outsider intruding on their business, but you had also shamed the gang in front of the underboss, one of the people present there.
Being somewhat new herself, She got nervous thinking of the consequences you'd face for messing with the mafia world. She heard a deep chuckle from behind her, somewhere and chills ran down her spine.
"Actually, we do have an opening" One of the taller males whispered in a low voice. At this point, no one could tell if he was being serious or whether he just wanted to chop your head off. She gripped her drink harder and stared at both of you. She noticed it was none other than the boss's right-hand man and most trusted member, the underboss, San. Should anything happen to the boss, the gang would be given to San.
You twirled a piece of your hair in between your fingers as you smiled back. You weren't intimidated. Besides, he looked no more than around 5 years older than you. You stepped closer, staring into his sparkling, yet cold brown eyes. You noticed how his hand gravitated dangerously close to your personal space and you were slightly more alert. Through the corner of your eye, you noticed how his hand was moving closer to your waist but none of you broke eye contact. Before his hand made contact with your waist, you grabbed his wrist. The hand that was twirling the piece of hair swiftly snapped down, grabbing his wrist tightly. His eyes widened and he tried pulling away gently while you kept the firm grip, not breaking eye contact. The others around you gasped but you kept glaring at him while he had an amused smirk on his face.
"What kind of opening?" You gritted out. Sure, you were desperate, but you weren't going to let people throw you around and use you. Your eyebrows furrowed as you tried to assert dominance but he just looked at you and tilted his head. A smile broke out on his face, a genuine one this time. You loosened your grip, letting go of him, still a little cautious as he simply massaged his wrist, still maintaining a smile on his face.
"I think you'll like it more than you think"
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Although you had originally joined because you needed money. You found that this lifestyle had fit you more than you thought. You enjoyed the thrill and you couldn't imagine yourself working anywhere else. It had been around 5 years since you joined and you were now 21. Meanwhile, the burgundy-haired girl, Ashe, became your best friend and you even lived together. The bond you shared was to die for, you loved each other to bits but also were each other's biggest supporters. You maintained your bitchy persona and starting rubbing off on Ashe too. Soon, she also developed a colder more confident aura. You were with her through thick and thin. Your position now was a spy and secondary shooter. Despite shooting not being your main pursuit, out of the gang, you were one of the most skilled in using them. Some even compared you to the boss, but you shrugged them off. San was for sure the best shooter out of the entire gang though.
Surprisingly, San, the underboss, who you found was 22 at the time was now 27. You had developed a close bond. Your relationship consisted of a lot of teasing and inside jokes as well as a lot of protectiveness from San. Although your relation started rough, it slowly transitioned from mean comments to teasing names and now playful banter. You had a sibling relationship and he was like the brother you never had. You both were the best with guns in your entire gang so you bonded quite a lot as you spent a lot of time training and practicing together. Not to mention when you'd both geek out over specific new models that were brought into the weaponry.
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Back to the present, you were at the usual bar. After joining the gang, you quickly realized that this was the go-to spot for after-work hours. It wasn't mandatory to come here, but it was kind of a tradition every Friday to come and just let loose for a bit. Most of the gang was here and it was usually the same people every time. Today though, something was different. The boss had come in. To outsiders it would seem casual, as if a normal friend group was getting wasted, to everyone in the gang though, you knew that was far from the truth.
The boss had never come with you guys, and although it was after working hours, you all couldn't help but be on your best behavior. He had often heard that his gang members would meet up after work on a friendly basis and he wanted to know what this was about. He heard San talking about it during work once and was intrigued ever since. Thus, here you were... here he was... along with the 14 or so others who usually came to the bar.
To be completely honest, coming to the bar was your favorite part of your job, scratch that, your entire week. You looked forward to it all week and when it finally came you let loose. It was a known fact that you and San were the crazy daredevils of the group. You both had absolutely no fear or shame in the things you did. Today though, you both had tried to be on your best behavior. Despite being his right-hand man, San was still a little intimidated by Seonghwa and you often used to playfully gossip about him, so you both made sure to behave today, or at least tried...
Seonghwa stuck out like a sore thumb. It was clear no one was expecting him to come, and to be honest, nobody wanted him to come either. He was leaning against a counter, eyes scanning the crowd carefully while sipping a rather small glass of whiskey. Typical Seonghwa, being cautious and defensive even off the job. You hadn't had too many personal encounters with Seonghwa, you had just seen him around a bunch.
Meanwhile, although you and San had agreed to tone it down a bit, you couldn't help it. Drunk was an understatement. You rushed over to the front as soon as the adrenaline hit you and had roughly shoved some people off the raised platform of the dance floor. You were shouting random lyrics into the crowd and hyping everyone up while pulling a few random strangers onto the stage. After swaying your hips a bunch and screaming song lyrics into strangers' faces, you realized this still wasn't enough. You staggered to the DJ and snatched one of the many mics and went back to the stage.
Acquired with a new toy to distract you, you began to get everyone's attention.
"Good evening ladies and gentlemen" You slurred into the mic. By now, most of the gang members had gotten used to your crazy shenanigans and didn't mind. Although many were initially afraid of San, you had defiantly changed him for the better. He finally found someone to match his energy and charisma and he let loose a little, finally free to show his true self. Everyone had gotten used to it at this point, but this was different, the boss was here.
Most of them immediately sobered up hearing your booming voice from the gigantic sound boxes. Ashe was hooking up with some random girl somewhere else, but as soon as she recognized it was you, she immediately began to look for you.
"How's everyone doing tonight? Are we having funn?" By now, you had gotten the attention of everyone in the bar, including Seonghwa. He looked at you with a dangerous gleam in his eyes, he recognized you. You were the little minx that caught his eye the day you joined the gang, you barely spoke to him, but he could sense the confident aura radiating from you.
The mic was roughly snatched from you, by one of the guys, you assumed was the manager, and you scoffed, rolling your eyes, walking towards the dance floor. He wasn't going to stop you, no one was. Since you had gotten everyone's attention, everyone's eyes were on you. You hopped over to the center of the dance floor, hair bouncing as you fully let go. You swayed your hips and ran your fingers through your hair.
You heard a few whistles and hollers around you and a bunch of hands touching your waist. At this point, you were too drunk to even react properly and just continued dancing, enjoying the attention. You hyped everyone up and began jumping to the beat, hair bouncing over your shoulders as you shook your head from side to side at the beat.
By now, you had caught Seonghwa's attention too, he was intrigued by your carefree persona outside work and admired your ability to separate your two lives. Meanwhile, Ashe had rushed to your side, trying to pull you away from everyone. Despite being drunk, her motherly instincts kicked in and she felt the need to protect you.
"Y/n, what are you doing? The boss is watching!" She practically yelled. You just gave her a disapproving look and pulled her into the middle of the circle.
"Asheeee, just let loose for one night, why are you always so uptight?" You slurred to her, caressing her waist. She gulped and looked back at your eyes. You raised your eyebrows and smirked, if only you knew the effect you had on her. As if on cue, the DJ played the worst song possible, a slow, sensual one.
You whispered the lyrics into her ear as you wrapped your arms around her neck. You caressed the back of her neck with your fingers and tugged on the smaller strands of hair in the back. You slowly started moving your waist to the rhythm as she tried steadying you, you were drunk, this was not okay. You pulled your hands away from her neck and caressed her cheeks in both of your hands, inching closer. You kept whispering the lyrics and she felt your warm breath on her lips. She was slowly gaining confidence and eventually grabbed your waist in her hands. You looked down at her hands and smirked. You brought one of the hands caressing her cheek to softly trace her bottom lip. You stared at her lips, inching closer and closer, warm breaths mixing.
All of a sudden you turned around, your back facing her, as she steadied you again. You began moving again, bending forwards purposely to rub against her. You swayed your waist and pushed backward. She knew what you were doing and slowly inched her hands downwards towards your ass. Although you were best friends, there was no doubt that there was some sexual tension between the two of you.
She began tracing patterns on your hips and butt as one hand remained on your waist. She felt around your waist, trailing patterns around your skimpy black dress until she felt a harder material near your chest and stomach. She blushed immediately not meaning to touch you there and placed her hand back on your waist. You chuckled as you ground against her harder, now definitely trying to start something. She lightly moaned as she gripped your hips, trying to pull you back up, she wouldn't be able to hold herself back for much longer like this.
"Goodness me, what have I walked upon here?"
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Way to ruin the moment Choi San...
Ashe froze upon hearing his voice. She immediately pulled her hands away from you and stepped back, a dark red blush now coating her features. Meanwhile, you were too drunk to think straight and simply frowned at the lack of contact, you were just about to get laid.
The second the others saw Ashe step away from you, random strangers started touching you again. One of them grabbed your waist, as another gripped your chin. You closed your eyes and continued moving to the beat and San sighed.
"I think that's enough, step aside before I make you" San huffed, a hint of frustration and anger at the end. Everyone obliged immediately upon sensing his dominating aura and you were once again alone. You sighed, eyebrows furrowing as you looked around, most of the people around you had moved away. You stumbled slightly and tried stabilizing yourself, only to fail miserably and almost fall over.
San rushed over and held you by your shoulders to steady you.
"Why hello there, handsome man" You sloppily winked at San and he rolled his eyes.
"Y/n what on earth are you doing? You made quite the scene just then..."
"I was having fun... you're such a killjoy, Saniee." You slurred, sticking your pointer finger into his chest. He simply pushed your finger away, trying to be strict with you.
"Yeah, your definition of fun being screaming lyrics into the mic nearly deafening everyone, throwing yourself at random people, grinding on Ashe and almost kissing her, and practically falling on the floor and eating shit" He was frustrated, but he couldn't help but feel protective over you. Despite scolding you, he still had an arm around your waist, looking deeply into your eyes, hand on your back, holding you up so you didn't fall. It was subtle things like this that showed that he deeply cared and under his strictness, he was just a big softie.
"I- I what?" You sighed trying to step away, now that he was recalling the events it started setting in.
"Yeah, how about we sober up, hmm?" He asked and you nodded as he dragged you back to the counter. You looked back one last time, only to see Ashe looking at you with heartbroken eyes. You looked away feeling guilty as tears glimmered in her eyes. To you it was just a bit of fun, to her it meant the world. Even just a few minutes where you seemed interested in her made her feel special. Deep down, you knew she might have liked you, so why did you lead her on and rub yourself against her?
You sighed shakily feeling immensely guilty. San looked down at you, as he noticed tears falling down your eyes.
"Aren't you a mess?" He chuckled and you breathed out shakily
"Shut up san" Your voice broke as you softly spoke. His eyes widened and he sat you down on a barstool.
"Why are you crying, what's wrong?" He asked as he rubbed under your eyes with his thumbs, gripping your jaw with one hand.
"I might have ruined my friendship with Ashe," You said softly and he sighed.
"Why would you think that?" He said, looking into your eyes as you tried averting eye contact.
"Deep down, I had a feeling she liked me, and I made things worse by leading her on. I rubbed myself on her like an idiot and I fucking led her on, gosh I'm such a bad friend!" Your voice cracked as San 'hmmed in understanding.
"Well, why did you do that?" He asked as he gripped your chin making you look back at him.
"I- I... I was drunk, I AM drunk." You clarified, stuttering a bit.
"No you're not," He said matter-of-factly. You raised your eyebrows in confusion as you urged him to continue.
"Y/n, I've known you for more than 5 years now, I've seen you drunk over a million times, I can tell when you're actually drunk... You may have fooled the others, but not me. Here's the real question, why the fuck are you pretending to be drunk?" He asked all of a sudden and you felt vulnerable.
It was crazy how he could read you like an open book. Your eyes widened as you tried looking away, there was no point in continuing the charade at this point. He looked back at you expectantly and sighed, as he saw you getting nervous.
"It's alright, I don't think anyone else noticed either, now please tell me what's wrong?" He said in a soft tone as you sighed.
"I can't tell you San," You said looking back into his eyes.
"Why? We aren't on duty, why are you being so secretive? Especially with me?" He specified the word 'me'. It was true, you usually never kept anything from each other so this was a bit weird.
"I just can't tell you I'm sorry" You sighed, tugging on the roots of your hair, as your hands gripped your scalp. He just sighed in understanding and got up. As he was about to leave, your hand snapped back and you gripped his forearm.
"I'm sorry San, but I can't help it. One more thing, don't you dare tell anyone." Your voice dropped an octave lower and he gulped, he had never seen you so serious before.
"Act as if you know nothing, I'm sorry it has to be this way, but just carry on with whatever you were doing and please stay out of my business just for today." His eyes bore into yours dangerously but you didn't back down. You had never commanded him before, so this must have been serious. He eventually realized it must have been something important and walked away, but not before scoffing at you.
You sighed and looked down, feet dangling over the barstool. That was close. With your cover now blown and known to San, you had to be a little more careful now. You were glad no one else had figured out though, not even your best friend Ashe. Your thoughts went back to Ashe and you felt incredibly guilty. How stupid you were, willing to throw away your friendship of 5 years, your only real friendship just to put on an act and sell your drunk state. Pathetic. You sighed as you looked back to where you were a couple of minutes ago. Although you felt immensely guilty, you couldn't help it, it was a part of your act.
Trying to go back to what you were doing, you eyed a few of the people at the bar. Although you had to act drunk, actually drinking was off-limits for today. You ordered a sparkling lemonade for yourself while looking around. Meanwhile, your eyes caught on Seonghwa. He was leaning against a counter, head leaning back. his eyes were closed and his soft bangs fell over his forehead. He brought his drink up to his lips and took a small sip. As he swallowed you saw how his adam's apple bopped up and you gulped feeling giddy inside. You tried shaking yourself out of it, but when he placed his drink aside and ran his hand through his soft, black hair, you almost lost it. You could barely see the sheen of sweat coating his forehead as he brushed his fingers through his hair.
Luckily for you, you were interrupted by the bartender bringing over your drink, and you looked away embarrassed. You shook your head to get rid of any weird thoughts or feelings as you were sure you were practically drooling. Without looking, you brought the glass to your lips to have a sip. Just as you were about to take a sip though, you caught a whiff of a rather familiar smell. You pulled the glass away from your lips and looked questioningly at the bartender.
He just looked the other way and raised his eyebrows, ushering you to follow his gaze. As you did, you found a well-built, tall, brown-haired man staring back at you. You looked back at your drink and swirled it around a bit. You noticed that it was an alcoholic drink and there were some undissolved white particles at the bottom of the cup. You looked back up at him and he simply winked at you, smirking. Pathetic. He just tried to fucking drug you and thought you'd fall for it.
You smirked realizing your act worked and he actually thought you were drunk. You tried to cover up your discomfort and simply flashed him a lop-sided smile. You turned around, tilting your head back and lifting your hand to your mouth, acting as if you had just downed the drink. You sneakily slid the drink over the counter into some far corner, so no one would notice. You messed up your hair slightly before turning back around to catch his attention to further solidify your act. As soon as you turned back around to look at the guy though, you noticed he was gone. You furrowed your eyebrows and looked around, trying to find him.
"Looking for me, honey?" You heard someone sensually whisper into your ear from the side. Chills ran down your spine, but you tried to cover up your discomfort and disgust. You turned to him, looking him in the eyes, making sure to look a little droopy before calling out to him.
"Hi~" You slurred, making sure to breathe out so your warm breath hit his face. His eyes immediately rolled in pleasure, jaw-dropping as he took in your sexy aura. You almost scrunched your face in disgust but clenched your jaw to stop your reflexes. He opened his eyes again and inched closer to your face as he spoke again.
"You're so gorgeous, damn, how have I never noticed you?" He said, his breath hitting your face. Your nose scrunched as you smelled the alcohol in his breath. Luckily he thought you were just reacting to his compliment. More importantly, however, you confirmed he was drunk... Perfect. He would most likely let down his guard so you had a solid chance at executing your plan. He also revealed that he was a regular at the bar, another important piece of information you needed to confirm your suspicions.
You giggled as your hand slowly trailed up his chest. You rested your hand firmly on his chest as you tried to push yourself further into him. He hummed and trailed a hand down to your waist. Although you didn't want his hands all over you, it was inevitably a part of the job, so you tried your best to just power through it and ignore it.
He leaned in closer until his bangs fell over your forehead. He secured his hands around your waist and held you tight. You flinched from the roughness and tried squirming around to loosen, his grip but he didn't budge. Soon a hand trailed to the side of your hip and you knew where this was going. You sighed and looked down at his hand. Normally, you would have instantly pushed him away, but this mission was far more important than how you were feeling at the moment.
He rested his hand near the dip of your waist, right above your hip, testing the waters. Remembering that you needed to act drowsy, you looked back up at him, your eyes fluttering as you smiled one last time, before falling limp in his arms. You heard him grunt as he easily threw you over his shoulder. Although this should have seemed like a major red flag to anyone around you, people weren't paying attention and they probably didn't care either. You internally whined at the situation you were in and slyly looked around, he was walking towards the back of the club, near the backrooms. You wiggled around a bit in his arms and he resorted to pressing a hand against your ass. You moved around slightly, still acting as if you were drugged, trying to get his hand off you, you couldn't directly push it off as he'd know something was up.
"Where are we goingg" You slurred, trying to indicate you were still conscious.
"Don't worry about that, honey" He whispered, smacking your ass. What a pathetic sick fuck he was. You groaned at the impact, bracing yourself for what was to come next.
Meanwhile, Seonghwa was simply looking around, observing his surroundings and being cautious as usual, when he noticed a man carrying one of the ladies into the backrooms. He knew she was unconscious, most likely drugged and being taken into the room against her will. It seemed as though the people around them didn't even care. He looked a little more closely and noticed what she was wearing. A bodycon black dress up till her thighs, with studded embellishments on the waistline and straps. It was you. He has seen you around the headquarters, tagging behind San all the time.
"Y/n?" He whispered, beginning to get a little angry, it was one thing to mistreat a woman and force yourself on her, but it was another to mess with a member of his gang. He saw how you were thrown over his shoulder, head hanging upside down, hair cascading down halfway to the floor. He huffed in anger, looking around for backup, ready to stop him, but when he saw the man smack your ass and feel up your dress, he lost it. He smashed his glass of whiskey onto the nearest counter, glass shattering as he did so.
He immediately pushed past the people around him, trying to get to you. His head tilted slightly down, eyes locked on his target, a few meters ahead. He looked psychopathic in all honesty. His bangs covered his forehead and eyes slightly. With his head tilted down, he was able to cover up his deadly eyes and killer expression. He couldn't care less about the people around him at that moment, his only concern was teaching that guy a lesson for messing with his gang.
He pushed past some people, shoving a couple of guys on the way until he was about halfway there. He was ready to just fully commit and barge across another load of people before he was interrupted.
"Uhh Hwa? What are you doing? Why do you look like you're about to kill someone?" He heard someone next to him say. He whipped his head to the side, ready to punch whoever it was that came in his way, before realizing it was San
"Because that's exactly what I was about to do, before you came in my way, now move." San shivered at his tone. Never had Seonghwa ever commanded San in such a way. Sure Seonghwa had been angry a lot in the past, but his frustration this time seemed more emotionally fuelled.
"No, no, no, that isn't a good idea, how about we think about this for a secon-"
"I SAID MOVE! Can't you hear me?" Seonghwa growled as San violently flinched at his loud tone.
"Why what's so urgent, is everything alright?" San inquired, straightening his clothes a bit, and regaining his composure.
"I'm not obligated to tell you that" Seonghwa finally said, before shoving San out of the way and walking towards the direction the man was walking before. What he didn't realize though, was that in the time it took him to talk to San, the man had seemingly disappeared.
"What's wrong?" A voice from beside broke him out of his thoughts.
"Look what you've done, I lost the man now" Seonghwa replied, massaging his temple, trying to calm his frustration.
"What man?"
"Someone threw the girl- Y/n over his shoulder and took her to one of the back rooms" He claimed, gripping the bridge of his nose in annoyance. San's eyes widened and he gasped. He knew you were up to something tonight but was this a part of your plan?
"What?" Was the only thing he could muster. He wanted to ask why, where, and how you even got in that situation, but he was too stunned.
"Not only that, he had the guts to slip his hand under her dress and feel her up, not to mention inappropriately grab her and spank her" He sighed, beginning to look around again. San gasped and immediately began frantically looking.
"Why didn't you tell me earlier" He panicked, looking around, running towards the backrooms trying to find you. He didn't doubt that you could defend yourself, but what if someone did drug you. He knew you knew better than to accept drinks from strangers and were always cautious, but he couldn't help but worry. His breath quickened and he began pacing around frantically.
"Calm down, we'll find her" He felt a pat on his shoulder, reassuring him. He let out a sigh, before nodding and continuing to look around.
"Why does this girl mean so much to you anyway?" Seonghwa dared to question, voice slightly laced with a negative tone. Was he shaming him, threatening him, genuinely curious, or maybe even slightly jealous of the way you were able to bond so easily?
"You don't even know the half of it."
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Meanwhile, the man had dragged you into one of the rooms in the back, locking it before, dropping you on the bed. Your legs dangled off the bed as he slowly approached you. He unfastened his belt and slowly pulled it through the belt loops. Through the corner of your vision, you were able to see exactly what he was doing and you knew where this was going.
He dropped the belt and slowly climbed on the bed, hovering over your legs. Meanwhile, your fists clenched unconsciously, head slowly turning away from him as he approached you. You really didn't want to do this, but you had no other choice. You had to keep him occupied for another hour or so and you had no clue how else to. You couldn't poison him or knock him out as you had no clue what tracking devices he could have had on him. Your jaw tightened and your hands unconsciously gripped at his shirt, subtly trying to push him away. Feeling some rustling from underneath, he looked down at your hands and noticed you pushing him away.
"Aw, honey there's no need to be scared" He whispered and you internally sighed.
"I never got your name, by the way, I bet a pretty face like this has a pretty name too..." He whispered into your ear from above.
"Y/n" You weakly grumbled.
"Yours?" You dared to question him back.
"Jungwoon, but I doubt you'll remember it tomorrow," He said, caressing your face. You sighed and realized he was right, you had to act as nothing had happened.
You shouldn't be able to even remember that his name was Jungwoo- Wait. His name is Jungwoon. Jungwoon? That wasn't the name you were told earlier when you were informed of the mission. Unless you got the wrong person... Your eyebrows furrowed unintentionally as you tried processing the information.
"Why? surprised honey? I'm second in line to the Kwon empire, brother of the infamous mafia boss, CJ Kwon" He said snickering a little. What an idiot, he just admitted his identity and now you confirmed your suspicions. You got the wrong fucking person.
You scoffed realizing your mistake, and he simply looked at you, confused. You shoved your knee in his groin, as you lifted yourself upright. He flew backward slightly at the impact, feet back on the ground as he tried regaining his composure.
"What the fuck is wrong with you? How aren't you out?" He questioned, still bent over, clutching his sensitive area. You just ignored him, standing up and tilting your head to the side, trying to figure out what you were going to do. The whole reason you couldn't knock him out was because of any tracking devices he might have had. Now knowing he was the son of a big Mafia empire, you had to be careful.
"Okay I mean no harm, I don't want to hurt. You're a trash person, but I still don't want to get into any trouble, so if you could excuse me" You raised your hands, trying to get out of the room as soon as possible. He made it quite difficult for you though, as he pulled out a gun from one of his back pockets, aiming it at you.
"Absolutely not! You're a crazy lady and you attacked me, I can't let you go" He aimed the gun right at your chest as you raised your hands above your head. You slowly started walking towards him, but he cut you off.
"Don't come any closer!" He gripped the gun harder, finger on the trigger. You examined his posture and the way he was holding a gun, for some indicator or weak spot. You looked at his fingers and then the gun. Aha!
"You leave me with no choice, I wasn't going to hurt you, but seeing as you're literally pointing a gun at me, I can't help it." You sighed, hands dropping to your waist, as you looked him dead in the eye.
"I'm gonna shoot you first, you crazy bitch." He huffed, readjusting his stance, now aiming the gun at your head.
"You see, the gun you're holding is a Kahr MK9-1, so the ejection port is visible. It isn't pushed back completely, meaning the gun is unloaded. Furthermore, the magazine release is triggered, meaning there aren't any bullets loaded either." You sighed, pressing your temples. His eyes widened as he pulled the trigger, only for a soft click to be heard. He removed the magazine, inspecting it, indeed, he forgot to load his gun.
"You're an idiot, you brought an unloaded gun, what good is that?" You scoffed, now walking towards him. You cracked your knuckles before raising an eyebrow at him. He backed up, a little scared of you now, you seemed to be well versed with guns and Mafias, you must have been a part of a gang. You were smaller than him, but we were aware that you could very well be capable of more.
"No, no, no, I'll let you go" He nervously said before gulping.
"Now what fun is that?" You said, tilting your head and snickering at him. He backed up into a corner of the room as you walked closer towards him.
"How does it feel huh?" You whispered as he looked down at you afraid for what was coming next.
"How does it feel to be backed into a corner? I bet it sucks, right? Well, that's what you've been doing to a bunch of innocent girls at the bar, so take this as a lesson before trying to pull something on anyone else next time." You sneered as he looked down at you blankly. His attitude and facial expressions were getting on your nerves so you decided to teach him a lesson.
You shoved your right arm into his jaw, with a clean uppercut. Shoving him backward as he stumbled, falling back into the wall behind him.
"Do you understand, you sick fuck?" You yelled as you grabbed the collar of his shirt. He nodded his head rapidly as he held his jaw in his hands. You just scoffed and left the room, head mildly aching from the idiot you just had to deal with.
As soon as you left the room, however, you remembered your mission. You panicked realizing you might have fucked up everything. You got the wrong person, meaning the real target was somewhere out there. You started brisk walking until you reached the main area, away from the backrooms. You fixed your hair quickly, trying to look for your target. Knowing what Jungwoon looked like, finding his brother, now shouldn't be too hard. You jogged through the crowd, looking around, scanning the place the best you could.
You looked back at the usual seating spot for your gang and realized it was practically empty. Your eyes widened as you quickly ran over to the seats there, looking for any familiar faces. You reached the area, noticing there were a few cigarette packets, vapes, and half-empty drink glasses, however no people in sight. You inspected the area, trying to look for any clues as to why and where they would have gone.
Sweat started collecting at the back of your neck, realizing this may have been your fault. It was your responsibility to occupy CJ tonight and you failed. What if he got to your gang? What if he had gotten to Seonghwa. You shakily sighed, a hand going up to your face to press your temples. You gulped dryly before thinking of a possible explanation. Your thoughts were cut short though, by a loud booming voice from behind you.
"Hands where I can see them bitch!"
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Meanwhile, Seonghwa and San were going crazy, trying to look for you. San was admittedly panicking more, while Seonghwa was mildly frustrated.
"Where is sheee?" San whined. By now he was starting to get genuinely worried. Of course, he believed you could take care of yourself, but the whole night you seemed extremely shady. You were hiding things from him and were pretending to be drunk. What if you got caught up in some dangerous schemes?
"Calm down, we'll find her, we just have to-" bang! Seonghwa started, only for him to be cut off by a loud bang. Both of them knew better, it was a gunshot. They exchanged knowing glances, before scurrying to their side of the bar. Although your safety was quite important too, it was Seonghwa's duty to make sure the rest of his gang was alright too.
With people screaming and running around, getting to where they wanted was a little harder. San roughly pushed through the crowd, while Seonghwa stayed a little more cautious, one hand clutching the gun in his back pocket.
"Move!" San roared at the passersby. His voice startled the people around, and they made way for them. San ran over to their usual corner, pulling a gun out of his pocket, firmly grasping it with both hands, holding it in front of him, remaining cautious. Meanwhile, Seonghwa, followed behind closely, running a hand through his hair, chains of his belt jingling as he paced around the area. San squinted, his gun still in front of him as he looked for the gang members. As soon as they reached their side of the club they realized what all the commotion was.
"Drop your weapon, let him go!" San yelled as he witnessed one of the members from an opposing gang hold a knife to one of the young spy's neck. He simply snickered, tightening his grip, the knife now cutting through the skin of his neck slightly as blood dripped down his neck. The young boy squirmed, only for the knife to dig deeper into his neck. He grunted, tears pooling in his eyes.
"What a fucking coward, going for the younger ones, eh?" Seonghwa growled, a dangerous yet playful tone to his voice. The growl was heard in his voice as it dropped in pitch and volume, deliberately trying to scare the man.
The man with the knife didn't budge, however, simply chuckling before, running the knife along the neck of the boy, cutting horizontally across his smooth skin. The boy cried, as his hands came up to grip the knife, only for him to feel lightheaded and nearly pass out. The rest of your gang members gasped, some even whimpering at the young boy's situation. The man with the knife looked back at your gang members as they looked helpless. They couldn't do anything, they knew if they did, he would cut the boy's neck cleanly in half. He looked back and deeply chuckled before refocussing his attention on the two men in front of him.
As he looked ahead though, he realized they were nowhere in sight. He looked around only to be greeted by a cold hard piece of metal pressing against the side of his head.
"I said let go" Seonghwa grumbled lowly, his voice deathly commanding and serious. The man gulped, looking at the gun pointed at his head, through the corner of his eyes. Before Seonghwa could fire his shot, however, a strong pungent smell spread across the room, he furrowed his eyebrows as he heard coughs and whimpers.
"Not so fast, Park" He heard someone snicker. He noticed how San, who was standing right in front of him, began to stumble, gripping onto a chair next to him. It must have been poison or some sort of toxic gas. Seonghwa felt the room spinning, his vision getting blurry as he looked around at his gang members coughing and clutching their stomachs.
"Cover your mouths and noses" He tried to warn them, only for it to come out as a bare whisper. He looked around, most of the members now passing out. He saw San, clutching his stomach, before looking up at him. His eyes fluttered as they got droopier. San simply grunted in pain before mumbling a soft 'sorry' and passing out, his head falling straight to the floor. Seonghwa felt helpless, he tried resisting it, but everything in his body burned. His throat burned and his ears rang.
He clutched his ears, a loud ringing noise making its way to his ears, overwhelming his senses. He let out a gasp, feeling breathless as his trachea burned. His eyes soon fluttered shut as he tried gripping onto the last strings of hope, before succumbing to the poison and passing out...
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"Hands where I can see them bitch!" A loud noise made its way to your ears. You slowly raised your hands as you slowly turned around. Behind you was probably your worst nightmare. Most of your gang members had passed out cold, behind the man. Some of them even tied up to chairs. San, Seonghwa, Ashe, and a young boy were tied to chairs, while the rest were still on the ground. You looked up at the man in shock, your eyebrows furrowing as your tried to process the situation. His face resembled Jungwoon's so there was only one logical explanation, this was his brother, CJ, the man you were after all along.
"Is this some sort of sick game to you?" You dared to question, walking closer to the man. He simply chuckled at you, firing the gun in your direction. It didn't seem as if he tried to kill you, although he aimed for the top of your shoulder, the bullet grazing your acromion. You screamed in pain, crouching down, your hand instantly flying to your shoulder. Albeit a mere flesh wound, it managed to dig quite deep, leaving a deep open would. Blood gushed through the wound as you pressed harder, trying to stop the blood flow.
"Well, it could be if you wanted it to be" He claimed, laughing at your situation. You looked up at him from the floor, shooting daggers with your eyes. He chuckled as one of his members passed him a water bottle. He snickered, before opening it, taking a sip, and clearing his throat. You furrowed your eyebrows, how was he so relaxed, the fate of an entire mafia gang was in his hands.
He chucked half the bottle into Seonghwa's face, and then another quarter into San's. He threw the bottle into some distant corner and yanked at Ashe's hair. Meanwhile, Seonghwa gasped, regaining consciousness, which must have only been a temporary toxin. His hair was wet, water dripping down his bangs, as they fell over his face. He glared daggers at the guy, before trying to get up, only for him to realize he was tied up. He struggled in the ropes, the rough edges, digging into his silky smooth skin.
San had also regained consciousness, gasping as coughed and choked. He blinked realizing the situation he was in. He looked around, noticing Seonghwa, and Ashe, and the other younger boy, as well as the rest of his gang members, and then finally you. His eyes widened as he struggled to try to free himself.
"Y/n?! You're okay?!" He questioned, sighing in relief as he finally found you. His relief was only short-lived, however, as he noticed you clutching your shoulder. He noticed the dark red stains on your hand and neck, a pool of blood on the floor, dripping from your shoulder down to your elbow and onto the floor.
"What did he- What did you- YOU BASTARD! WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER, LET HER GO!?" He yelled, tugging on his ropes. He didn't care about himself at the moment, only what happened to you. You noticed how he started pulling harder, the ropes now digging into his skin as he tried pulling out. His wrists were bruised as the soft skin of his arms cut due to the rough edges of the rope. Blood trickled down his arms as his arms got raw from the pulling and tugging of the rope.
"San-ah, don't resist, I'm fine" Your voice wavered, as you tried regaining composure. Seonghwa's eyes softened as he noticed the sheen of your eyes, tears collecting. He sighed, looking down, unable to look at your current state, you must have been in so much pain, both physically and emotionally.
"I-" You started, only for your voice to break, a strangled sob escaping. Seonghwa's head whipped up as he noticed how you squeezed your eyes shut, tears now falling down your cheeks. You bit down your lip, as your shoulders shook. Your head faced the ground but it was clear you were crying. Whimpers and sniffs echoed as members of the opposing gang simply laughed.
Seonghwa felt anger bubbling up, but he had to stay calm. Seeing you break down like this in front of everyone, evoked a feeling of fury and seething rage. He simply looked away, unable to take in the sight of you being so vulnerable. You had always been one of the toughest ones in the gang.
"Now, now, no need to cry honey" You heard CJ whisper. He roughly yanked Ashe's hair once more and you winced at the way her neck snapped to the side. She got up with a sharp inhale, and a loud groan as she tried to understand the situation. CJ walked closer to you, his hand gripping your chin, tilting it up towards him. Seonghwa grunted as he tried tugging harder at the ropes.
"Don't touch her, you son of a bitch" Seonghwa finally growled. His eyes glaring daggers at CJ. This was the first time you heard him speak tonight and it was a tone you weren't too pleased to hear. His voice had a slight rasp to it, voice lower than the deepest trench of the ocean. Water dripped down his face and neck, making the side of his face shine in the light. His dampened clothes clung to his body as his eyes glared through his bangs.
"Oh, don't worry, I won't have too much fun. Now, if you could please get up for me, my darling I have an important mission for you" He maniacally giggled. You mustered all the energy you had and pushed yourself onto your feet, one hand still clutching your shoulder. He handed you his gun and your eyebrows furrowed. He stepped back and you instantly took the chance to point the gun at him. Your breath quickened as you tried to calculate his next move, what on earth was he up to.
"ah-ah darling, it's not me you'' be shooting. It's one of them" He pointed behind him to your four other gang members tied up in chairs. Ashe gasped as she let out a strangled sob, San gasping as well, as Seonghwa simply sighed, taking in your expression. You looked blankly back at him as you readjusted the grip on your gun with your wounded arm.
You shifted your gaze behind him, only to notice, four other men, standing behind the chairs, a gun pointing to each of their heads. "Shoot anyone else, and a bullet goes through all their skulls... that wouldn't be a pretty sight, would it?" He claimed, laughing at his own crazy scheme. By now Ashe was crying hysterically and you couldn't help but feel emotional too. You tried looking away, knowing the second you would look into any of their eyes, you'd break down. You roughly wiped at your nose, nodding, agreeing to his terms.
"I love a game of Russian roulette." You sniffed, chuckling sarcastically.
"May I spin the barrel?" You asked innocently and CJ simply chuckled loudly.
"I knew you had it in you!" He laughed, roughly patting your back. You rolled your eyes before inspecting the gun a bit. You opened the barrel, realizing there was only one bullet, he must have known when the first bullet would go off. You internally smiled realizing you had cracked the code.
You locked the barrel in place, before spinning it, the bullet clanking across the cylinder. Your arms shivered slightly as you raised the gun. Bingo! You were never one to be afraid when it came to guns. The shivering was an act. An act to shake the gun a little to hear where the bullet was clanking. You heard the clanking on the bottom of the barrel, realizing the bullet was going to fire on the 5-6 shot. Realizing it had already gone off once when CJ shot you, it was only logical that the bullet was in the 5th chamber.
You smiled before aiming the gun at San first. His eyebrows furrowed as he realized you were proceeding with this absurd plan. The moment he saw you smile, however, he knew you had everything under control. Besides, he trusted you. You winked at him, before placing your finger over the trigger.
"Just to clarify, If I shoot all of them once, you leave us alone? Whether one of them gets shot or not?" You spoke up, glancing from the corner of your eye.
"That is correct. Now, take your shot lady." You smiled back at him, before pulling the trigger while the gun was aimed at San. He flinched slightly at the noise but quickly covered up as a laugh erupted from him.
"This one got lucky... try the next one" CJ urged you. You rolled your eyes as you walked over to the unconscious boy. He looked young, maybe 16 or 17, and his neck was slashed, blood oozing from it at a slow rate. You quickly looked away and pulled the trigger. Despite knowing it wouldn't go off, you still had to act as if you were scared. Ashe yelped from next to the boy at the loud noise and Seonghwa sighed in relief.
"Well, well, well, I guess they both got lucky... How about your best friend now, you both seemed to be getting it on the dance floor no? It would be a shame for this epic love story to end so tragically." Ashe blushed a deep red as San chuckled from the side laughing quietly. You huffed in annoyance before pointing the gun at her. Her eyes filled with tears as she tried to speak.
"Y/n, if this gun goes off right now, just know that I forgive you, it's not your fault, no matter what-"
"Shut up Ashe" You yelled. The last thing you needed was a sad emotional goodbye, as you knew the second you saw her cry, you would too.
"No! Listen to me, never for a second think that you're responsible for any of this. I love you a lot, and I'm still mad at what you did back then, but it-" bang! Ashe squealed as the next gunshot went off. CJ's jaw dropped, another one was left unscathed. You winced slightly as she flinched. You didn't mean to be rude, but she was getting a little too sappy and you already felt terrible.
"You've been lucky so far, but it's a 1 in 2 chance now. Chances are, the legendary Mafia boss, Seonghwa Park will die, right here, tonight. Not just that, but to the hands of one of his most loyal members." He chuckled maniacally and you pointed the gun at Seonghwa. He gulped as he noticed your finger on the trigger, awfully close to pulling it. You looked straight into his eyes and could sense the fear in them. He gulped, eyes shifting around the room as his foot bounced impatiently.
You sighed, mouthing a "trust me" subtly, and smiling at him. His eyes widened as he realized you had planned this all along. You knew exactly when the bullet was going to go off. He should have known, besides you were the second-best with guns in the entire gang, of course, you would know. His eyes softened, as the corners of his lips tugged upwards.
You returned the smile and readjusted your stance. Meanwhile, CJ on the side had no clue what was coming. He believed with this next shot, the mafia boss of the Park gang would be dead, already coming up with plans to take over the empire.
You pulled the trigger and Seonghwa didn't even flinch. He simply chuckled deeply, before tilting his head back... that's how much he trusted you at that moment. CJ's jaw dropped. This wasn't the way it was supposed to go.
"ONE MORE!" CJ yelled at you as you flinched at the sudden loud voice. Seonghwa's eyes furrowed as he heard him. Your eyes widened as you processed the situation.
"I said one more! Take one more shot, or I'll drive a bullet through Park's head. I don't care who you shoot, but one of you is not going to leave alive today, and I will make sure of it." CJ grumbled, another one of his members passing him a gun. He pointed the gun at Seonghwa's head shoving it into his forehead. Seonghwa inhaled sharply before looking back at you, worried. It was obvious to everyone now that whoever you shot was going to die now. The last chamber had the bullet, so it would fire.
"Why do you care so much about someone dying today!" San yelled from the side.
"You took away one of my young hackers. You shot him right in the back. He's paralyzed now! FUCKING BASTARD SAN! I don't take such matters lightly, and for ruining his life, one of you is now going to pay with yours! I don't care who it is, one of you is going to die!" CJ yelled, gripping San's collar. He gulped realizing CJ found out about one of his missing hackers. Truth was, San helped him fake his paralysis to get him out of that vicious gang. He was now working for you, but CJ could never know that, or he'd go after the young boy.
"So it doesn't matter who I shoot?" You clarified, your voice shaking slightly to sell the act. CJ grinned from ear to ear, looking back and nodding smugly. Seonghwa looked at you with concern as he knew you were up to something. His eyes furrowed as you lifted the gun.
"What about this?" You asked, now pointing the gun directly at your chest. San gasped from the side, Ashe yelling at you to stop, while Seonghwa's eyes widened.
"I supposed that is acceptable too. Now get on with it!" He yelled as both the gangs waited for your next move. You took in a deep breath of air before pulling the trigger of the gun. You gasped at the impact, and fell to the ground, clutching your chest.
The next few seconds were a bit of a blur. Not from the actual shot itself, but the commotion around you. You heard the footsteps of the opposing gang members as they scurried out the club. You heard a bunch of cries and whimpers from presumably San and Ashe.
Your back made contact with the floor with a loud thud, as you winced from the pain. Seonghwa immediately felt a surge of urgency, as he tried breaking free from the ropes. He yanked as hard as he could, cutting through his wrists slightly, as the ropes snapped. His wrists were bloody and his arms were bruised all the way p, but he couldn't care less.
He roughly yanked at San's ropes, loosening them a bit, just enough for San to free himself. His breath quickened and his eyes widened as he approached you. He rushed over, immediately crouching down to your level. He sat down on his knees, desperately trying to hold you up. He shifted next to you and brought your head to rest on his lap. Your eyes fluttered shut, as his big arms cradled your face, holding your cheeks in each hand. His cut wrists, left a trail of blood, on the exterior of your face, your hair clinging to your face from the damp blood and sweat.
"No, no, no, you're strong Y/n, you're going to survive this" He whispered to you, his breath caressing your face as his shallow breaths continued. He must have really freaked out. He began lightly, tapping your face, shaking your head in his hands slightly. He, brushed your hair away from your face as his fingers rested on your temple. You heard him let out a whimper, as you felt a warm droplet fall onto your cheek. Wait... was he crying? It couldn't have been... The legendary Park Seonghwa crying over one of his members dying. What a sight. He shifted slightly, moving one of the hands that were cradling you to press at your chest. His large palm, pressed softly at your chest, rubbing against the bottom of your left breast. That's where you drew the line.
"Uh-uh, hands off me" You claimed, pushing past Seonghwa, trying to get up. His eyebrows furrowed as his eyes widened. You promptly stood up, as he remained seated on the floor, not understanding the situation. You walked over to the younger boy, untying him too, before grabbing a tissue, pushing at the large wound in his neck. You looked around, trying to find someone to help you, and looked at San. His eyes were wide as he was frozen in place.
"Stop staring and come help me, you ass!" You yelled, ushering to come over. He quickly rushed over, before cupping your cheeks.
"I thought you were going to die..." His voice broke, as you scoffed.
"Come on now, I wouldn't leave you that easilyyy" You whined before guiding his hand to the boy's neck.
"Hold it in place, we need to get him medical attention quickly, or he might bleed out." You passed him the tissues, before walking to untie Ashe. As soon as her wrists and arms were untied she pounced on you. She engulfed you in a hug, sobbing into your shoulder.
"You dumb bitch" She cried into your shoulder, as you patted her head, cradling her face. She pulled away and you looked down feeling guilty.
"I know, I'm sorry" You whispered out, only for her to scoff, before pulling you into another bone-crushing hug. You winced in pain, as your shoulder was hurting quite a bit. You simply resorted to rubbing her back for now. Your little moment was broken by a small cough heard from the ground. You looked down, only to notice, Seonghwa was still sitting on the floor, eyes wide, as he tried processing what was happening.
"Mr. Park... You're uh, still on the floor..." He looked right into your eyes, his eyes narrowing as he pushed himself up to his feet, walking towards you. He looked down at you as you tilted your head up, making direct eye contact.
"Firstly, I am touched and flattered that you cried for me, who would have thought..." You said, more to yourself, as Seonghwa brought his hands to his face, touching under his eyes. He realized his cheeks were wet with tears, as he roughly rubbed at them, sniffing and scrunching his nose.
"Secondly, that was inappropriate, dude! You can't just go around groping women you know?" You yelled as his eyes widened. You pointed back at your chest, indicating where he had tried pressing before. You knew he was trying to prevent, possible bleeding, but you couldn't help but tease him a little. He refocussed his attention to your chest, staring at the hole in your dress.
"Eyes up here buddy" You caught his attention. He scoffed, before bringing you into a hug. Engulfing your smaller body in his larger build.
"Ow! my shoulder, be careful, Park!" You scowled as he pulled back.
"Y/n what the fuck? You're supposed to be dead" He finally said, before bringing his hands, to your shoulder, to inspect the wound.
"Actually no" You pulled back, pulling the neckline of your dress down. His eyes widened as a blush grew on Seonghwa's cheeks. You flipped the top of your black lace bra outwards showing a navy blue thicker lining underneath.
"Bulletproof lining, I managed to push it up from my stomach to my chest when I uh, broke down" Seonghwa sighed, pressing his temples.
"You weren't crying?" He asked, a hand cupping your cheek as he spoke.
"Well no, it was a distraction, to bend over and push up the lining to my chest. The tears from before as well, they were fake too, sorry San, I had to sell my act..." You mumbled but San still heard. He scoffed as he walked towards you.
"I figured as much" He smiled back at you.
Seonghwa tightened his grip on your jaw as he realized something. You gasped as you tried pulling away.
"You knew what was going to happen? Why the fuck didn't you tell me?" He said a little louder. You didn't budge, knowing what you did was right.
"Because! If I were to tell you, you would have brought around 20 other bodyguards accompanying us. Besides this wasn't even the original plan... I was supposed to sleep with CJ, distract him for the night so he couldn't carry out his plan. Turns out I got caught up with his brother and had to... deal with him first." Seonghwa loosened his grip on your jaw before sighing, tucking a piece of your hair behind your ear.
"Regardless, I'm proud of you, you know? You outsmarted them all and saved our lives. I owe you thanks." He said before stepping back. You felt dampness on the side of your head. Realizing it was blood, you grabbed his forearm, before inspecting his cuts and bruised wrists.
"Why did you do this to yourself?" You scoffed, before, walking over to get him a tissue to wipe the dried blood for now.
"For you, Y/n... I thought you were dying..." He sighed as gripped onto the base of your dress.
"So what? It's a part of the job. I knew what I was signing up for. I very well knew that death was a possible risk. Besides, why care about me so much? I'm rather expendable actually." You said matter-of-factly.
"No, you're not. Never feel like that. You mean a lot to the gang, a lot to me. Even though we don't interact often. I know how much you do for the gang, how much work you put in for everyone." He said, looking at you sincerely. You smiled back at him softly, booping his nose, turning on your heel.
"Let's get cleaned up shall we?"
128 notes · View notes
nekomasmanager · 3 years
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Tanaka Ryūnosuke × Reader
I'm extremely late to posting this even though I had it all written out beforehand. But oh well( ̄︶ ̄)↗
Here is one of my personal favorites, cause I absolutely adore Tanaka, he resonated with me, ever since his first appearance.
You can find the ao3 post about this fic here: ao3 post
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Pairing: Tanaka Ryūnosuke & Reader Word Count: 3137 Fandom: Haikyuu!! Original Post Date on ao3: 03/03/2021
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You always knew Tanaka-San had a crush on Kiyoko. You already knew that. But you couldn't not fall for his charm, his sense of humor, and his skills on the court. You were also sure that he doesn't even know who you are.
You were just a member of the girls volleyball team. Sure you may have your special moments when you spike a ball the right way to score a point, but other than that, you're just a regular volleyball player. So when Tanaka came to you for advice, you were legitimately surprised.
At first you didn't answer him right away, thinking it was a prank, and looking for your teammates because they discovered your crush on the fellow spiker. But when you couldn't find any of them, you gladly accepted to help him. And well, you wished you asked him what kind of advice he needed. Because you weren't prepared for the devastating feeling you got when he told you he needed help asking Kiyoko out.
Not letting your unrequited feelings get in the way, you managed a weak smile and nodded, saying you'll help him however you can. "Sweet! Thanks Y/N!" "You're wel... wait you know my name?" "Well yeah of course I do! I would never forget the name of the girl whose spikes are out of this world!" He moves closer. "And well I couldn't forget the girl who always sneaks around to check out the boys volleyball practice." With that last statement, you blush profusely, mutter a quick flustered good bye and run away, listening to Tanaka's laughs behind you.
You couldn't believe it. He noticed you sneaking by the gym to see their practice. He even saw how you spike. Damn now you're going to be self-conscious whenever you're going for a spike in practice or in a match. "But how did he know I come to watch him and his team practice? I always try to stay hidden and not bother them, so how?" you mutter to yourself, not looking where you're going, and you just bump into someone. You quickly excuse yourself, but you're still thinking and don't notice who you bumped into, so you just continue on your way.
"Y/N?" You look up quickly and look around, searching for the source of the voice. There's only Nishinoya, and of course it's not him who called you, right? How would he know your name? But as you keep looking around, you heard him snicker, and you blush. "Y/N are you okay?" "Wait. You're talking to me?" "Well yes. There's no one else around, as I'm sure you noticed while looking around." "But how do you know my name?" "All of our team knows who you are, dummy! You're famous amongst us!" Horror struck your face, and you start panicking. What did he mean you're famous? Famous how? Did you make a fool out of myself in front of them and didn't notice? What are you going to do?
"Y/N calm down. It's nothing like that! Don't worry! It's my fault I should've been clearer. You're famous because we all know you watch us practice and watch us play our matches. And well whenever you're around Tanaka-San is always on top of his game! So thank you for that!" he said with a big smile on his face.
You could only look at him in shock. Were you that obvious with your sneaking around? You always try to make it to their matches to cheer them on, and you always go to watch them practice because they were just so cool to watch. Whenever you practiced with your team, you tried to incorporate what you saw with what you already know, but it would always turn into a hot mess and ruins everything. But you still tried to make them work.
But now that the entire boys team knows you're watching them, how can you face them? How can you face Ryūnosuke and help him get the girl he likes? And what did Nishinoya mean by Tanaka always playing better when they know you're watching? You had way too many questions on your mind and you had to blow off some steam. "I.. um.. I have to go now, I gotta practice or something. Bye Nishinoya-San!" He chuckles, amused by your flustered self, "Bye Y/N! See you at next practice!" You couldn't even answer, you just turned red and ran away, almost falling because of your own feet. Hitting yourself mentally, you get away even faster.
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You make way towards the school's gym, making sure no one is around, and you just start practicing. As you shoot your serves, you're thinking "What would Kiyoko-San enjoy as a gesture or present? What would be cool enough and not cringey at the same time? Why am I even helping him, I don't know Kiyoko that much! Sure I greet her in the hallways, and help her with minute tasks but that's it. Ugh I dug this hole myself, might as well make the most of it."
You try to focus again on your serves, but there's one thought that keeps gnawing in your mind, what did Nishinoya mean by Tanaka being on top of his game when you were watching? Shrugging off the questions from your mind, you went to pick up another ball from the pit, and that's when you realise you were not alone in the gym.
Before checking who the mysterious person was by the ball pit, you let out a high scream, scared for you life. "Quit your screaming Y/N!! It's me Tanaka. What are you even doing here all alone? I was looking for you everywhere!" "Tanaka-San? How did you know where to find me? And why were you looking for me?"
"Well I saw you talking to Nishinoya while looking for you, and as I was about to come greet you, you got all flustered and left him, almost stumbling to the ground." You hit yourself mentally, damn you made a fool out of yourself in front your crush, this day cannot get any worse. "I went up to Nishinoya to ask him where you went, and he told me you came here to practice. But before coming here I had to pick up something to show it to you. So close your eyes please." Sceptical about all this, you still closed your eyes, trying to calm down your excitement, Tanaka wanted to show you something!! You felt something a bit heavy being placed in your extended hands, and hear Tanaka telling you to open you eyes.
Looking down, you're faced with a box of chocolates and tiny teddy bear to match. You look up to the boy in front of you, questioning him with your eyes, trying to hide your blush. "This is a gift I picked out for Kiyoko-San. I wanted to see if she'll like it or not. So I thought showing it to you first and getting your opinion would be better, before I do something stupid."
"Oh." "You don't like it?" asking you with a hurt look in his eyes, mixed with something you couldn't quite place your finger on. "No no nothing like that. I think it's actually really sweet that you got this for Kiyoko. I'm sure she'll really love it. I was just surprised that's all! Don't worry!" He sighs, relief washing over him. "I also think that this gift paired with what I had in mind for a confession would be perfect. Since Kiyoko stays until the end of practice, you could ask her to wait up for you when you're done. You get her the gift. You look sweetly into her eyes, and say 'I really like you, and it's been a while since I do. I guess you might have noticed before, but now I wanted to say it more seriously. So please accept my gift. I would also be really happy if you returned my feelings.' And I guess that's about it, you should be ready for a confe-"
You stop in the middle of your sentence, because Ryūnosuke was standing really close to you, seriousness radiating from him. He gently raises his hand, and wipes under your eyes. You did not notice you were crying. Embarrassed, you give him back his gift, and worked quickly at wiping those tears away. "Ah I must have felt emotional and happy for you. I'm glad I gave you my idea, even if you don't use it in the end, I was happy to help. Do tell me what happens after that confession. I'll wait up after your practice to know all the details! I have to go now. See you soon!"
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You spilled all those words out, wanting to get away from him, in fear that your tears will flow down even faster. You left him without letting him speak. You just had to get away. Your cheek still tingles where he touched you to get rid of that singular tear. His hand felt so warm and you just wanted to snuggle, close your eyes and enjoy that closeness. But no you couldn't do that, he'll soon be someone else's boyfriend, and you just couldn't do that. You were running, as fast as you can. Your vision was blurry. You were crying again. You had to stop.
Seeing a nearby school building where no one actually comes here, you lean up on one of its walls, and just break down. Sliding down, you sit on the grass, and start sobbing. You hear the bell ringing calling student back to their classroom, but you couldn't care less. Your heart was aching and breaking, because you loved someone who doesn't love you back. Your body was shaking. You wanted to hit yourself for falling for someone you knew could never be yours. After a few minutes of crying your eyes out, you slowly calm yourself, still sniffling with the occasional hiccup.
You look up to the bright blue sky , and decided to tread back to your classroom, not caring if you were late. After a quick bathroom break to wash your face, you walk slowly back to your shared classroom with your crush and his teammate. Keeping your head down, you open the classroom door, and you can feel the stares on you. Apologizing for being late, the teacher lets you in with a warning and you promise to not be late again. You go to sit down at your designated window seat, and start staring at the field and nature outside, filtering out the words your teacher was saying. While staring outside, you failed to notice one particular boy who keeps on glancing at you, worried about you, with his heart aching and thumping loudly in his ears because of you.
Classes are finally over, but you stayed seated, wanting to copy down the notes you missed. You saw a shadow blocking your light, so you look up and see Nishinoya next to you. "Oh! Hi Noya. What brings you here? You need something? Don't you have practice?" "I just wanted to make sure you were okay Y/N. You never come late to your classes. And when Tanaka told me what happened, I was even more worried than him. Well no that's not true, he was scared shitless about where you were and why you were late. And when you came in late, with puffy and a downcast expression on your face, I knew you were crying. Want to tell me why?" You never knew Nishinoya was this observant. Feeling shy, you grab one strand of your hair while trying to explain yourself. "I just fell down while running back to class, and I hurt myself, so I cried like an idiot, and took some time to wash off the dirt in the bathroom. You don't have to worry about me!" Mustering a sad smile, you can see that he wasn't convinced by your fake story, but decided not to pressure you into telling him. "Well I'm glad you're better. But now come on! We have to go to practice!" You knew you couldn't argue with him, so you just quickly picked up your things and followed him out towards the gym.
Getting to the gym, you stop by the bench under the window and seat yourself, while Noya changes his shoes and enters the gym. As you're sitting down, trying to be comfortable, the libero player comes back out and starts looking from left to right, and when he sees you, he comes up to you. "What are you doing still out there? Come on in!" "But but I always stay out here so I don't distract you and I also study a bit!" "None of that! Come on. The whole team wants to finally meet you properly!"
You take your bag, change your shoes, and come in, shyly standing behind Noya. As you enter, all eyes turn to you, and you can feel yourself blushing like crazy. "Nice to meet you all, I'm Y/N. Sorry for the intrusion during your volleyball practice." "No intrusion at all. We were waiting for you to join us!" You turn and see that it was Coach Ukai that just spoke to you. Beaming to finally be able to speak to the famous coach of the boys volleyball team, you couldn't contain your excitement, and gave him a big hug, and realise way too late that everyone was looking at you.
With firetruck-red cheeks, you let go of the coach and scratch your neck, looking sheepish. When the initial shock wears off, you hear the coach's laugh and you feel him patting you on the head. "I like you already. You recognize talent when you see it." Smiling, you nod at his words. You go sit down on one chair and take out your books to study a bit. But you see yourself glancing every once and a while towards a certain player wanting to see him practice. Whenever he spikes a ball really well, your heart swells, but that quickly dies down when you see him looking at Kiyoko to view her reaction.
With an aching heart, you go back to your solving of mathematical equations. The end of practice soon comes around. You gather your supplies while saying good bye to the other players, having enjoyed watching them practice. Nishinoya comes up to you, and you both exit the gym quickly, cause you knew what's going to happen soon. You take your time putting on your shoes, telling Noya to leave before you so he won't be late.
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Being alone, you wait up, sitting down on a bench. To your surprise Kiyoko exits the gym soon after you and wears her shoes, preparing to go home. You go up to her and ask: "Wait. Where are you going? Where's Tanaka-San?" "Oh. He's inside, he told me to call you in when I got out." Confused, you wave her good bye and enter the gym again. It was all empty, except for the boy you liked standing in the middle of the court.
"Tanaka? What are you doing? And why didn't say anything to Kiyoko? She was right there! Did she reject you before you got the chance to give her your gift?" You're met with silence. You come closer to him, touching his shoulder gently. He turns around, and just engulfs you in a hug. Shocked, you slowly hug him back. You felt him relax when you wrapped your arms around him. "What's wrong? Did Kiyoko let you down? Tell me." You couldn't stand him not talking to you. You stop your questions when you hear him mumbling.
"What is it? I can't hear you properly." "It was never about Kiyoko-San. Sure she's pretty and cute, but she's nowhere close to you. When you didn't come to class, I was freaking out. Asking myself if it was my fault you came in late. And when I saw your puffy eyes and sad expression, my heart broke. I never want to see you like that. I know now what I asked of you was really unfair, but I wanted to know the best way for me to confess my feelings to you, but I ended up hurting you and making you cry. I'm such an idiot to make you go through all that. Please forgive me, I couldn't forgive myself for causing you so much pain. I like you so much. I can even say that I fell in love with you. I love you."
You were at a loss for words. While Ryū was squeezing you in his arms, the same words kept repeating in your head.
It was never about Kiyoko-San. I love you. It was never about Kiyoko-San. I love you. It was never about Kiyoko-San. I love you. It was never about Kiyoko-San. I love you.
You slowly get out of the hug, looking up at Ryū's face. Hopeful look in your eyes. "Do you really love me?" "Yes. I love you so much Y/N. Ever since I noticed you coming to watch us practice, I found myself seeking you out, whether in class, or for your help in a fake matter, that I regret doing so much. I started loving everything about you." Blushing like crazy, you buried your head in his chest. Slightly laughing, he wraps his arms around you in a loose hug.
You muster up your courage, stand on your tiptoes, and whisper in his ear. "I love you too, Ryū." Not being able to contain his excitement, he picks you up and twirls you around, laughing and being so happy that you love him back. When he puts you down, you grab his cheeks gently and bring him down to face you. You kiss him sweetly, humming when he kisses you back, wrapping his arms around your waist.
"So.." Tanaka asks still encircling you with his arms. "Does that mean we're officially a couple?" Lightly hitting him in the arm, "Of course we are you dummy." "Yes! Everyone will definitely be jealous of this hot couple. They can only dream of being like us." Laughing together at his adorableness, you stay in each other's arms, content with everything in your lives, and that you finally found each other.
Nishinoya was definitely there during the whole exchange, knowing from the beginning how you both felt about each other. He's the best third-wheel you'll ever encounter. He'll definitely brag about you two and how he helped bringing you both together, even though he didn't really do that much to help. But you still love him both, he's definitely a great friend. You'll never tell him that, but you also tell people that it was him that brought you both together.
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Yay! My fanfic about Tanaka is finally up! I hope you enjoy reading it!
The next one is the longest I've written until now and it's with Tsukishima Kei!
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miss-dr-reid · 3 years
Text
This is calm, and it's, Doctor #9
TW, there is some DV in here and a hospital visit.
As we pulled into the street where the icecream shop is, I saw someone I recognised and my stomach churned. It was my ex. I hadn't told anyone at work about him, yet.
"What's up?" Derek asked. I didn't even realise I had gone stuff until I breathed, glancing at Derek quickly.
"My ex.. he's over there with a mate..." I said quietly, looking in the direction of the one person I hoped to never see again.
"We don't have to get icecream of you don't want." He reassured, placing his hand on my upper arm, rubbing lightly with his thumb.
"No- um- actually... I have a plan. I'll need you guys to help though, if that's okay?" I devised a plan with the boys after finding a park. They both willingly agreed, eager to help out a friend with some pretty revenge.
I got out of the cat and headed to the icecream shop, where my ex was, sitting at a table outside of it. As I got closer, he made a comment, just as I expected.
"Damn, Y/N, you want me back that bad you followed me all the way out here?" Cain retorted, tapping his mate on the arm.
"Well no, actually. Last I heard of you was from the girl you cheated on me with. She told me you kept yelling my name while you guys did the dirty in OUR bed." I clapped back. I whipped my hair behind my shoulders, signalling the boys, I knew what I said would run Cain the wrong way.
He pushed himself up, to get out of his chair when Derek's hand pressed him back down by his shoulder, Spencer's arm draping over one of my shoulders.
"Is there a problem here?" Derek said, staring straight in to Cain's eyes, his mate shifting uncomfortable in his seat.
Cain was not a big guy by any means, bigger than me, but tiny next to Derek.
"Who are you, her boyfriend?" Cain demanded, basically a spitting in Derek's face.
"I'm more to her then you'll ever be. If you cause her any more trouble, I'll make you regret everything you've ever done to her. I can promise you that." Derek's voice stern and low, his grip tightening slightly on Cain's shoulder.
Seeing Cain so uncomfortable was quite pleasing. He didn't say anything, Derek squeezed his shoulder one last time before nodding, releasing him and walking over to us, linking elbows with me. We walked inside the shop and everyone let go. I thanked both of the guys and insisted on paying for icecream, as a thanks for helping me out.
They insisted it was no big deal, defending their family is what they do. I loved hearing that o was becoming part of the B.A.U family.
I ordered the icecream, paid and we each connected our own and headed back toward the car. We sat on the curb, eating our delicious desserts. We didn't say much, just sat and ate. I felt so small sitting between these two guys. I was so happy to just be there with them.
Suddenly, I was going face first into my icecream, which was splattered all over the side of my car as a sudden jolt came through my back. I didn't realise what had happened. I could hear Derek yelling as hands supported my head while I laid back. Spencer's voice filled my ears as everything went dark.
I woke up, rocking slightly. I monitor beeping and people talking. I tried to open my eyes, but my eyelids were so heavy, they felt glued. My hand felt funny, I tried moving it and discovered that it was encased by another hand. I squeezed as hard as I could.
"Y/N!" Spencer's voice filled my ears once again. I managed to half open my eyes, softly smiling up at him. "We're on the way to the hospital. Your ex kicked you while we were eating icecream and Derek chased after him." His voice soft and full of concern.
'Now I owe them double, of not triple for the shit they've dealt with today' I thought to myself, forever grateful that these two are in my life.
We arrived at the hospital not long later. Spencer wasn't allowed in for the x-ray, so he was left in the waiting room. After the x-ray was done, I was moved to a room. After a few minutes, a doctor came in, Spencer in toe, who stood next to the doctor, listening to his every word.
"You'll need to be careful with your nose over the next week, it's broken. Otherwise, your head and spine are fine and you'll be able to go after you've been patched up and kept for observation." He removed the c-collar from my neck and sat the bed up, "A nurse will be in soon to fix your nose." And with that, he left.
Spencer sat in the chair next to the bed and handed me his phone with the camera open.
I took it and looked at myself. I was a mess. There was crusted blood staining under my nose, around my nostrils and mouth.
"This is going to look so bad tomorrow." I said quietly to myself. Even though there wasn't much of a bruise right now, the second day is always worse. Spencer sighed at my comment as I say there still checking myself out. The phone started vibrating, Derek's name popping up on the screen.
"You're on speaker, Mr. Hero." I said to the phone.
"Hey buddy, it's good to hear your voice," he started, "I'll be there in a minute. Just finished giving my statement to the police. I'm see you soon. Also, I told the rest of the team and they're also coming. See you soon, kiddo." He hung up.
The doctor came back with a nurse. Spencer was allowed to stay for the packing and fixing of my nose. The laid the bed back, Spencer on one side of me, the doctor in front of him and the nurse on the other side. Being laid out in front of people touching me made me feel so uneasy, I didn't realise I was tense until Spencer placed his hand on my shoulder.
"Stay as still as you can, this will be quite uncomfortable." The doctor mentioned, and the nurse picked up some gauze off the tray they'd brought in. I grabbed Spencer's hand off my shoulder and held it in mine. I closed my eyes and breathed out through my nose as one set of fingers pressed on the bridge of my nose while gauze was being stuffed up my nostrils. The nurse finished up and I breathed out deeply, I had become so tense while being under her hands that my whole body had basically seized. They sat up the bed and left, going to organise my discharge papers.
Almost as soon as they had left, the whole teamed walked in. Everyone had looks of concern on their faces, giving my sympathetic smiles. Spencer stood up and moved away as Garcia was making her way over to me.
"You gave us a scare, chook." She said, pulling me into a hug. JJ came down the other side of the bed and pulled me into a hug once Garcia had let go. She offered me a wet wipe, which I graciously accepted. I carefully wiped the bottom of my nose and around my lips, trying to remember where the blood had crusted on my face.
"As much good as they do, it wouldn't hurt to clean up a little bit..." She commented, seeing the stained blood on various parts of my face.
"Glad to see you're alright." Emily called from her spot between Hotch and Derek.
I thanked everyone and tried out my most convincing smile, which only got sympathy smiles in return.
"You wouldn't be okay if Pretty Boy was there. He caught your head before you fell back onto the concrete." Derek commended, gesturing at Spence, who's face started glowing red. I mustered up the best thanks I could for him, I was genuinely grateful. "Although, someone had to chase the bad guy...." Derek continued, detailing about what happened.
He told us that I was kicked in the back of the head, my icecream being thrown onto the side of my car, with my face following - thinking back, I remember the crunch my nose made when my face slammed into the side of my car.
HE told us that he immediately dropped his own icecream to jump up and start chasing the guy who had decided to leg it (not surprised). He chased the guy into an alley, yelling at him to stop.
'Stop! FBI!' he had shouted. The guy had managed to get himself cornered and stupidly turned to Derek and tried to fight him. Derek recognised the guy as Cain. As a punch was thrown, Derek dodged, grabbed Cain and pushed him to the ground, holding him there until police arrived.
Hearing the story, I was surprised to hear Cain didn't pull a knife out, it was his go-to weapon of choice. I was happy to hear he was finally arrested. After some more questions, Hotch went home to be with Jack.
The doctor came back with the papers and I was allowed to go. Even though I insisted that I was fine to drive, no one was letting that happen. I also had to have someone stay with me for the night, to make sure everything was alright, apparently. JJ couldn't, she had her family. Derek insisted he was busy with 'things'. Garcia had to get back to Kevin, Emily to Sergio, which left Spencer. It was agreed that he would drive me home in my car, and we had to take Derek back to his car on our way.
~
I felt weird climbing into the passenger seat of my own car. It was nighttime and it made me wonder,
"How long was I out for?" I quizzed, really wanting to know.
"If I had to guess, I'd say like ten minutes." Derek guessed.
"More like twelve minutes and thirty-seven seconds. I was timing to the paramedics." Spencer's voice matter-of-fact. I thanked him for being there for and with me the whole time, and both of them for dealing with everything today.
"I just don't understand how you could let anyone treat you that way, let alone date it." Spencer scoffed, "I've seen the scars you've got, I'm guessing aren't from 'accidents', they show when you're vulnerable, which isn't your fault at all, it actually shows just how trusting you are, which is great, but obviously can get you into trouble if you're not careful. What I'm trying to say is, vulnerabilities need to be taken care of, trust needs to be earned and time heals all wounds." he finished.
"Love also heals" Derek added.
I had tears stinging the corners of my eyes, Trying to escape.
Spencer pulled in to the car park of the Cafe we had been at earlier that day and pulled up in the spot next to Derek's car.
Derek got out and stood next to my door, I rolled my window down. He caressed the back of my head and guided it towards him, leaning over to kiss the top of my head.
"Take care of yourself." His head lifted to look at Spence, "And each other." he finished before turning to get into his own car, leaving to go home.
Spencer didn't move, he just sat in silence.
"What's wrong?" I asked, tilting my head to the side.
"I don't know where you live." He said, giving me puppy dog eyes.
With a giggle, I directed him towards my place. He stopped in front of his place on the way so he could grab a few things, ready to spend the night at mine. He insisted that I go in with him, because he's 'not allowed' to leave me alone.
"Doctors orders. That's me, I'm the doctor." He laughed at me, finding himself amusing.
"Well, I'm also a doctor, doctor, and I said no such thing. But if you insist, I'll come in with you." I said climbing out of the car, he followed and we went inside up to his place.
We walked in to his apartment and I sat on a stool at the bench, so I didn't get comfy.
Spencer wandered off to his room to pack. I pulled out my phone to see some missed calls and a few messages from a number I didn't recognise. I unlocked my phone and opened the messages from the unknown number.
'ur gonna pay 4 wot u did to Cain' Read the first one.
'u dum bitch' read another, the next few that followed were along the same lines.
When Spencer came out, I showed him the messages, not because I was scared, but because I didn't want to keep secrets. It's also probably a good idea to have as many people as possible know, in case anything were to happen. He sighed, reading the messages. He cupped my face with both hands and looked my in the eyes.
"Y/N, nothing is going to happen to you. Even if we have to have someone with you all day and all night. We, the team, will keep you safe - I'll do it by myself if I have to." he pulled my head against his chest and cuddled me, seeing the tears which had started pooling in my eyes. I let the tears come out, my body was gently shaking as I quietly sobbed into Spencer's chest, "You're okay. You're safe with us."
I cried, thanking him, wrapping my arms around his waste. He rubbed my back for a bit before placing his hands on my shoulder, pulling back a bit. His hands were firm, but gentle, he came down to my eye level. His eyes were so warm and welcoming, I admired all of his face while he was there.
He suggested leaving, and his hands trailed down my arms, to my hands. He took my hand in his and I hopped off the stool, following his footsteps to the door.
Not much was said on the car ride to my place. I didn't bother with the radio, only looking out the window, watching everything pass by, giving directions when necessary.
We finally arrived. I have a stand-alone house, on the outskirts of town. Spencer pulled into the driveway and got out. He rushed around to my door and opened it, just as I had started to. He helped me out and draped his arm around my shoulder as we headed inside.
OMG guys, I am so bad at keeping updated
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boop-le-snoot · 3 years
Text
PARTY FAVOURS I CHAPTER 13
first time readers click here 💖
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TWs/Summary: In this house, we ship Reader/Tony's Rolls-Royce. Reader and Tony being dorks on a date. That's it that's the chapter. Lots of sass and Tony being Tony.
A question for my readers: Are you still invested? How's the slow burn? Is everything realistic? 👉🏻👈🏻🥺
As usual, my beta is @miscmarvelwritings . I love her.
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"Nice digs, Cupcake."
"Nice ride, Tin Man."
The sass fell from my lips, warm and familiar, paving the way for our upcoming debut like the old, soft living room rug. Any awkwardness I had expected there to be left the moment I saw Tony pull up to my front gate in his Royce: the man was just that extra. The size of my estate, the five-figure outfit of mine - it paled in comparison to his own clout. 
In a world where my choices were usually distributed between stuck-up rich boys or insecure middle-class men, Tony was a fresh drink of water with his absolute indifference towards my and his own net worth.
I wasn't afraid to admire said ride, either. Being a huge petrolhead was what got me interested in engineering, physics and computer sciences in the first place. The desire for speed grew into thirst for knowledge: how to get more horsepower, how to tune, how to mod. No mechanic took an eighteen year old rich-girl seriously even when I had all the lingo right, I had to be a step ahead, at all times, if I wanted my ride to be the best. And I never settled for less than that.
"No driver?" I inquired for the reason behind the unusual behaviour. After all, a Rolls' wasn't the kind of car you drive personally. All the amenities it had, it had in the back.
"Gave Happy a day off," Tony remarked absently. I noticed the small quirk of his eyebrow, however. He was intrigued.
I decided to give it a shot. "So what, this thing packs, what, about five-fifty horses?" I mused, watching Tony nearly swerve into the opposite lane. "At two and a half tons, it's still gotta be pretty quick with that V12-turbo. How fast it go?" The satisfaction was immeasurable, as pleasant to my soul as sitting in a heated leather chair with the smell of a new car, engine quietly rumbling in front of me. And by quietly I mean, it was focus-or-you'll-miss-it kind of quiet.
"Well aren't you full of surprises, baby girl," Tony grinned; a happy, excited grin even. It made his face lose ten years of age just like that. "Zero to sixty in five and a half seconds," He said after a moment. 
"Not bad," I said, sounding impressed. I already knew that but I wasn't planning on robbing Tony out of well deserved praise for his choice in vehicles. 
"Got a ride of your own?" He asked with a smile, like he didn't know it already. No background check would have skipped my three speeding tickets, but I concur. This game was fun.
"I do, actually. It's a 2008 Range Rover. Supercharged," I added in the end, just to emphasise.
"A big car for such a little girl," Tony whistled playfully.
"I'm compensating," I deadpanned. "I'm a little slow on the uptake, y'know, so my Rangie with five hundred horses makes up for it. Gotta keep it balanced."
Tony chewed on his lip. "Five hundred? Haven't heard about that, it comes with three-ninety-five in stock," His eyebrow wiggled. "Tuned it?" He cast me a contemplative glance.
"Yup," I exclaimed happily. As far as the date, I would have been utterly ecstatic to talk about cars all evening. Screw the boring "where do you see yourself in five years" questions, talk to me about your favourite engine swaps. Concept cars, give me those. Monster trucks? Yes, please. Vintage low-riders? Couldn't wait to get my grubby little hands on one. Gimmee!
Tony kept his silence and kept his press smile starting the moment we set foot on getting out of the car. The place he'd taken me to was ridiculously upscale and fancy; the valet hesitated only for a second before catching the keys Tony so carelessly tossed in his direction. There was almost no fear in his body language when the boy approached the massive, expensive vehicle.
The hostess smiled big at Tony and gave me the world's biggest stink-eye when he looked the other way but what else is new? As soon as she left us in the privacy of our booth, I didn't hesitate to stick my tongue at her retreating back. A brief lapse in maturity, if you will.
Tony cackled, growing suddenly serious. "Did she bother you? I can get her fired. I should get her fired."
"Nah," I shrugged. "Don't really care, just wanted to showcase my amazing sense of humour." Snorting, I gave Tony a wink and a secretive grin.
"You really don't give a fuck, do you," His eyebrows twitched again, a sign of mild interest that I noted during our routine sciencing time together. Tony was incredibly expressive if one took the time to observe.
"I could suck your dick under the table right now," I answered honestly. "It's just that when God gave out things like dignity and shame, I wasn't home. Too many fun things to do, y'know," I spoke as casually as I could even though I was dying of laughter inside.
Eyes bulging, jaw hanging mid-way to the floor. Tony was serving Looks™ and I didn't mean just the white tee and purple blazer combo. "Princess, you're going to be the fucking death of me!" He took a sip from his water glass, smirking.
Finally releasing my mirth, I gathered my hands in a lock in front of me. His own, warm and calloused, reached over - I allowed the brief intimacy, clasping them, fiddling with the leather band of his watch. For a moment, it was just us, sitting in the dim light, discovering each other anew to Robert Johnson singing the blues and NYC bustling with life just behind the wall. 
The waiter took our orders - and if I totally butchered the Italian, Tony was gentleman enough not to make any remarks. 
"Somehow, every time I am with you, you both manage to meet my expectations to a T and surprise me at the same time," I wasn't able to completely ignore my nerves. My hand was still loosely in his and he didn't mind at all, me messing with his watch.
"How so?"
"I'm going to loosely quote someone, bear with me." Mr Davies's words popped into my mind just as I was wondering how to best articulate my feelings. "You're eccentric and interesting because it's, well, it's you, because it would be much weirder if we'd be sitting here and making boring small-talk and asking each other the genetic get-to-know-you questions," I briefly paused to sip my Dom Peringon and stare at our hands. Gathering my wits. "That would be why I don't do dates. It sounds so tedious on paper, just sorting through people until a person that's not absolutely mind-numbing comes around."
Tony was silent for a moment, the sheen of his eyes, the faraway look; he was lost in memories. Probably remembering all the girls he had charmed before. I didn't doubt it was easy for him: his smile was distracting and people usually were attracted to shiny things. He shone plenty. Also, most people were stupid, they never cared to look past the golden wrapper. I was convinced there was a diamond under it. But then again, I was biased.
"I've never thought about it that way, but I guess you're right," He finally said, serious. "With Pepper, at least, it was. Come to think of it, we never had that much in common, besides Stark Industries and her willingness to put up with my shit." It was painful for him to talk about her, that much was obvious. His laugh was forced and sardonic.
I, on the other hand, never understood why they got together in the first place. Or maybe I did - but the cold, composed Pepper and the chaotic, energetic Tony reminded me too much of my own parents. All four people in this fucked up equation could have been much happier if they choose... What? Being alone? That was terrifying, too.
I kept quiet, giving his hands a gentle squeeze.
"You know, this is so bizarre. Even an eighteen year old kid has got it figured out," He suddenly said, his tone bitter like the coffee that he loved.
"Woah, slow down," I put up a hand. "I never said I know what to do. I just said I know what NOT to do." The 'kid' remark would have made me eye-roll so hard my skull would crack any day. In this context, however, it was pretty spot on.
Tony snorted. "And how did you come by that information, pray tell, Baby?"
I huffed. "Have you met my parents?" We simultaneously cringed and I hurried to erase that mental image. "I make fun of myself for being into old dudes all the time," I made air quotes around the phrase that made Tony scoff, "But, honestly speaking, I've never even been on a date. Like a real one. Usually it's twenty minutes and I'm falling asleep mid-conversation. People can't seem to keep up with me or something," I felt genuinely dejected. "So many meaningless questions, so many downright idiotic comments. From men," I pointed out the obvious. "My mother used to tell me she thought I was gay because I didn't act like a girl... Whatever that means."
"That sounds pretty shitty," Tony was studying me like one would have been looking at an exotic animal in a zoo. "That said, I agree."
"That I don't act like a girl?" I teased him, the left corner of my mouth tilting upward. "Fuck that noise. I want to drive fast cars, drink straight liquor and have orgasms. If that makes me a dude... I look pretty good for a dude in a dress."
We laughed in unison, tension evaporating under the shared, mutual understanding. With Tony, it was easy. The waiter brought our selected dishes. Blink-and-he's-gone. Top notch service.
"A dude in a dress, can't say I'm surprised 'bout your lack of dates," He remarked conversationally, happily digging into his food. The noises he made were intriguing, to say the least, and I followed suit on my own food, finding it absolutely delicious. A delicious meal with a delicious man at my side. I refused to feel guilty about my thoughts.
"I guess I have exactly one (1) date on my ledger now," I raised my argument.
The fork clattered as Tony once again, came to a sudden realization. "Holy shit, you weren't kidding."
"No shit," I gave into the urge to roll my eyes. "But on the upside, my first date was with the most gorgeous, intelligent and witty bachelor of the city. I'd say I don't have it all that bad," I quirked an eyebrow at him.
"Aw, you're making me blush," Tony recovered quickly, grinning. "And don't be shy. The most desired bachelor of the country, if not the world."
I shook my head. "No, the world's most delectable bachelor is one of the Saudi princes. What's-his-name, the one who posts goat and horse pics on Insta," I snapped my fingers a couple of times, trying to remember the name as Tony looked at me all offended. "Anyways, you get my point. I could have a go at him, don't you think?" Cocking my shoulder, coyly twirling the strap of my dress, I gave Tony my best come-hither look and was rewarded with an appreciative once-over. His eyes were growing hungry again. 
"You're a million dollar baby," He finally said, voice low. "And the extent of people I would be willing to share you with is very small."
That got me interested, sudden heat prickling underneath my skin. The conversation took a turn I didn't expect it to; and there lied the delight of being around Tony. He was always ready to surprise, in the best way. "Tell me," I requested politely.
"That's a conversation for another time," He was enjoying the chit-chat, desire beginning to creep into his features.
"Mmm, you think?" I allowed the strap of my dress to slip down my shoulder, exposing a collarbone, showing him just how far I was willing to go to satisfy my curiosity.
He swallowed audibly. "I think... You're smart enough to figure it out," He finally gritted his teeth, finishing off his dinner and immediately calling for the check. 
I wasn't done yet, however. The possibility of riling him up, taunting him into a lustful frenzy - I was in heaven. Karma had favoured me that evening, it had given me a chance to get Tony back for all the times he unknowingly made my mouth water and my brain go blip. "Must be Steve then," I bit my lip in thought. 
Honestly? I was as clueless as the couple next table over. Steve it wasn't, that much I knew for sure, he and Tony had their little love/hate dramatic connection that always ended in a massive ego standoff. Tony would be on the frontline fighting against Steve if the blonde dared to show anything even remotely resembling romantic interest towards someone Tony himself had his eyes on.
"Princess," Tony growled, sarcastically raising an eyebrow.
"Not Steve," I replied, cracking a smile. Success! "You know, I'm really bad at guessing who's into me. Unless someone is balls deep in me," My face was mere inches away as we quickly shrugged on our coats. "And even then, I can't be sure."
My giggling was accompanied by Tony shaking his head in exasperated fashion; he took my hand nonetheless and I happily swayed it between us, poster child for "not a care in the world". He allowed it, maintaining the same exasperated air about him, and I let him. Fondness and happiness seeped through that anyways.
"Brat," His voice was kind. And his kiss tingled where he left it on the corner of my mouth, sweet and short. "Here, have a go," Before I could react, the keys to his Rolls Royce were placed in my palm and he was making his way around the car to the passenger's side.
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THE TAG LIST IS NOW OPEN! @another-stark-sub ​ @mostly-marvel-musings  @vozit ​ @littlegasps ​ @pilloclock ​ @shereadsinquiet @downeyreads ​ @hermione-grangers-wife ​ @individualistfem ​ @sleep-i-ness @capbrie @lillsxd @agustdowney @dee-vn @justanotherblonde23 @fanngirl19 @persephonehemingway (it finally let me tag you)! @softie-socks @schemefrenzy
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shall-we-imagine · 4 years
Text
Together we go. (Werewolf!Caesar Raphael x Reader *AU*)
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Lol it's never late to request I'm always late to write tho
Requested: 34. "Please don't do this." + 45. "I can't imagine this world without you." From this prompt list.
Genre: Raw angst 😂💯 happy ending though cuz I’m weak
Strap yourselves in cuz this is dramatic as shit and also I’m lowkey rusty sooooo yeah 😂
(First point of view)
Everytime our eyes meet, my insides twist in guilt. I can barely hold his gaze for longer than a few seconds.
“Can we please get some ice cream first?” Caesar gives me his usual puppy eyes- aka the most effective puppy eyes one could ever encounter. I can almost see his tail wagging behind him in excitement.
I giggle at the cute nature of the scene. “Of course.”
He grins, immediately grabbing my arm and rushing to the ice cream truck. I do my best to keep up with him and not break my face on the asphalt.
It was Caesar’s first time at a theme park, and he was overflowing with happiness to say the least; he genuinely resembled a large puppy. 
Though Caesar always insists that the puppy/dog comparisons I make are only because I knew of his identity, I'm pretty sure it's way beyond the fact that he's a werewolf. Caesar just behaves like an oversized puppy, whether he believes it or not.
"Mmhm! It's so good!" Caesar's eyes widened at the sweet flavour of his chocolate ice cream. Part of me was worried he'd collapse and I'd have to rush him to the hospital, but from the looks of it, werewolves can apparently eat chocolate. "How's yours?" He smiled at me. God that smile kills me.
"O-oh, it's nice!" I took the spoon into my mouth, unnecessarily trying to prove my statement.
His stare lingered, but before I could ask him about it, he sheepishly spills out a question. "Can I..um..can I try it?" He pointed to the paper cup in my hand.
Giggling in awe, I immediately scooped up the ice cream into my plastic spoon. "Sure." I moved my hand closer to him, expecting him to take the spoon, but instead, he leaned his head closer, taking the spoon into his mouth directly. My cheeks heat up at the small gesture, and I subconsciously start looking around to make sure we haven't attracted anyone's attention.
"Oh! It's really good too! What is this one?" Caesar's eyes gleam in fascination, as if discovering a whole new world, which in a way he was. He'd already explained how strict the pack is about interacting with humans and their world, hence his isolation from the pack after violating that rule. To be with me. And there I was, refusing to give up my group's approval.
"(Y/N)? Why do you keep zoning out today? Is something wrong?" His eyebrows furrow in concern, further engraving the guilt onto my heart.
"I'm just a little tired; don't worry about it." I do my best to give him a reassuring smile, but I suspect that only made him even more worried. "Come on, let's get in line for the ferris wheel." I pull him towards the giant ride.
Caesar stares upwards, "Woah."
"You're not scared of heights, are you?" I smile.
"I've never been that high before," he points to the top of the wheel, "but it does look a bit scary."
"Don't worry; it'll be fun." I take his hand in mine, giving it a small, reassuring squeeze.
By the time we reach the front of the line, we were both done with our ice cream and were just anticipating the ride.
The blond helps you onto the wobbly cabin and climbs inside after you're seated.
The second the small doors shut behind him, the colourful cabin moves upwards, causing Caesar to lose balance. He screams and drops to the ground, curling into a ball in fear.
I softly place a hand on his shoulder, "Caesar, it's fine. It...does that." I chuckle.
His expression softens. Sure enough, he lets me help him off the floor and onto the seat, where he's finally able to take a look at the view beneath us.
His beautiful green eyes widen in admiration, "It's not scary at all. It's very...pretty...just like you." He turns to smile at me, but I immediately avert my gaze shyly.
He takes my hand in his, "I love being with you; you make me happy."
The sincere look in his eyes drew me in, and before I knew it, my bottom lip starts quivering. "I- yeah, me too."I gulp, gluing my eyes elsewhere. I could no longer hold his gentle gaze.
Silence follows for a few moments.
Softly taking place beneath my chin, fingertips guide my face towards their owner, "(Y/N)? Why won't you look at me?" His concerned gaze almost burns holes in my face.
I let out a nervous laugh and take his hand in mine, "What do you mean? I'm just enjoying the view. Look; you can see the ocean from here!"
Caesar forces a weak smile, "Yeah, it's nice."
________
"(Y/N), are you sure we're not lost? I can't hear any cars ahead of us..." After walking through the woods for a bit, Caesar starts getting suspicious about whether we're actually using a shortcut to the bus station.
Hesitation and guilt take turns abusing my mind and heart. "Y-yes, Caesar. Just keep following me." I try to control my breathing rate and calm down.
The closer I get to the spot, the heavier my feet feel, the harder it is to push myself forward. "I can't do this." I drop to the ground and pull out my pocket knife.
"What do you mea-(Y/N), what the fuck are you doing?!" His statement was cut off by his own terrified yell. He drops to the ground and tries to pull away my weapon.
Having already dug the sharp edge into my forearm, I was disappointed by how difficult it is to actually find the tracking device. "Tracking device, Caesar! They'll find us; I need to take it out!" I kick the blond away, as I continue to search through my own flesh for the tiny device. The pain was unbearable, but it wouldn't compare to losing Caesar.
Blood dripped everywhere, making it even harder to see. "Fuck." I pant.
"It's not working." Tears hinder my vision, "Caesar, get out of here! As quick as you can!" The confusion on his face screamed in my face that it's my fault- all of it. "Please..." my voice cracks.
"No, (Y/N), I'm not going anywhere without you. Who are we running from? What's wrong? You know you can tell me anything!" He snatches the knife away and stuffs it in his pocket, the blood making a mess of his clothes in the process.
I push him away with my uninjured arm, "There's no time; please, just leave." Desperation hung at every word, yet he remained unmoved.
"Get up. We're leaving together." He tries to help me up, but I pull my arm away.
"They'll track us down, Caesar! The device is still in there!" I yell. "Please, I'm begging you; just leave before it's too late." I push him again, but he doesn't budge.
"(Y/N), we either leave together or die together; I'm not going anywhere without you whether you like it or not." The serious expression on his face is one I've never seen on him before; he's determined and stubborn, and I knew it.
I shake my head, "No, Caesar, you don't understand; I-"
"Was supposed to kill me, but you felt guilty; I know." He finished my statement, leaving me in a state of shock and shame.
"How- what? You know?" Realizing his lack of resistance, I fall into more confusion, "Well...why did you follow me here? You didn't know I'd feel guilty; I could've killed you!"
"But you didn't." Smirking, he shrugs.
"Caesar, I'm serious..." I stare at him with pleading eyes.
He sighs, "Well, I figured if the person I love the most wants to kill me then that's it; that's how I go."
"You came with me knowing you'll die?!" I cry.
"Well, I had hope you'd change your mind; I knew the love I'd felt with you wasn't fake. I felt your love...And well, I dunno about you humans, but wolves don't go killing wolves they love." He chuckles. "And if you'd killed me, well, I'd still choose that over escaping. I can't imagine this world without you."
"You're such a dumbass." I laugh lightly, but my smile drops at the sight of of something hitting Caesar’s neck.
And before I realize what's happening, He is hyperventilating as he grasps his neck, eyes terrifyingly wide; if I dIdn't know better, I'd think he was choking himself.
I rip out the tiny needle from his neck in panic, but it doesn't stop him from gasping for air, drool trickling down his chin uncontrollably. His eyes start to roll back, but he seems to be trying to hold onto what's left of his conscious mind, "Caesar! Caesar, stay with me!" Sobbing, I begin to shake him violently, but it takes mere moments before he drops to the ground.
The sound of footsteps slowly approaching hammers realization into my terrified brain, "W-why?"
"Girl, he's not dead yet; he's temporarily paralyzed." Kate rolls her eyes, but a warning follows through gritted teeth, "We're making the killing easier for you, so don't make this any harder for us."
"He's not a monster..." I shake my head, desperately pleading for his life, "He doesn't even belong to a pack; he's harmless!"
"Take out your knife, (Y/N)." She warns while the rest of the hunters watch me expectantly.
I look down at Caesar, whose eyes barely held any life in them. No way is he getting up any time soon, and my left arm has already gone limp. We stood no chance. This is it; this is how we die. And it's all my fault.
More warnings follow, but my eyes spot a tall man hiding nearby; he was clearly watching the conflict unfold.
When our eyes met, he put his index finger to his lips, telling me to keep quiet, which I do. I was gonna die anyway; I have nothing to lose, listening to random forest man.
Smirking at my obedience, he gracefully spreads his hand open in the direction of the hunters.
Within a second, they all drop their weapons to clutch their head in their hands, blocking their ears like they couldn't stand a very loud sound. A loud sound you can't hear.
Eventually they all fall to the ground, hands still covering their ears. That's when the stranger decides to step out of his hiding spot.
He slowly makes his way towards me and Caesar. I don't know if it's the blood I've lost or the intense gaze of the man, but everything begins spinning before going completely black.
________
"Did you hear me?! I said shoot him!" Kate screams.
Confusion consumes my every inch, "W-what?"
"Are you deaf?" She holds up her gun, aiming at my head. "Shoot him."
I slowly turn to look at where she motioned with a slight tilt of her chin. My shaky hands were clutching a gun aimed at a terrified Caesar on the ground. "Caesar?"
"Please, don't do this." Trembling, he shakes his head. "I love you. I would never hurt you; you know that." His teary eyes were hypnotizing; I couldn't look away for a reason I couldn't explain. I just stood still- and stared.
“I...I don’t understand...” I lower the gun I knew I didn’t even have on me before.
“Please, I’m begging you.” Caesar pleads.
I observe my surroundings in utter bewilderment. The number of hunters bacame overwhelmingly threatening; I didn’t know there were that many of them. So many faces I couldn’t recognize.
Before I could plan my next move, the sound of a gun shot rips through the air.
My head snaps towards Caesar. His fear-stricken, watery eyes stare back into mine lifelessly. 
My lips quiver, as I scan his body for the wound.
Till I found it where I didn’t expect to.
Hot, thick liquid trickles down my face, blurring my vision in the process. My fingers reach for my forehead, allowing me a chance at comprehending the situation. 
I’d been shot.
As if the realization was my cue, I watch everything spin out of focus till I completely lose consciousness.
_________
I gasp, immediately shooting out of bed, almost slamming my head against the stranger’s.
“Jeez, the potion sure is quick.” The man mumbles to himself.
“Potion?” I wipe my forehead, just to see a gooey, yellow substance dripping off my fingers. It was a dream?
“(Y/N)!” I find myself engulfed into a warm, tight embrace.
“Caesar.” I breathe out in relief, giving into the hug.
“Wait! The tracking device-” Before I could fully push away Caesar, the man speaks up.
“Already planted it on a rat; it’s gone forever.” He gives a smile I could only interpret as him being proud of his own intelligence.
“I don’t know how to thank you...How do I return the favor? Ask me for anything!” 
“It’s a bit funny for you to think I’d need anything from you.” Seemingly offended, the man rolls his eyes and sips his tea.
“He’s a bit...uh...timid?” Caesar whispers to me, hinting he’d already tried to thank the man while I was out of it.
“I already put a healing spell on your arm; there will be no scarring, but I’d rather you keep the bandages for a few more hours.” He glances down at my bandaged arm.
“Thank you...again.” I nod. “A healing spell though...are you a wizard?” My eyebrows furrow in confusion.
The stranger sighs. “Surely you can’t be that dense.”
“I think that’s a yes.” Caesar looks at me in slight uncertainty.
Another sigh. “Azusa Kuze, wizard from Hinomoto, nice to meet you. Anything else you wanna butt into?” He uses a slightly high pitched, cheery voice to ensure we understood he was mocking us.
“Uh, no, we’re good I think.” Caesar chuckles nervously, scratching the back of his head.
“Good.” He diverts his attention to the huge book on his wooden dining table.
“Um, well, I guess we’ll be going now, right, Caesar?” 
“Uh, yes. Thank you again, Mr. Hinomoto Wizard Azusa Kuze.” Caesar bows.
The wizard scowls but shakes his head dismissively “Yeah, um, you’re welcome.”
The second we step outside the small cottage, we both let out breaths we didn’t seem to know we were holding. 
“Well, that was a strange day.” I state.
“Yeah.” Caesar nods. “Wanna get some more ice cream?”
I grin, “You know it.”
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outspokensa · 4 years
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(  bella  hadid.    cis  female.    she/her.  )  /  word  on  the  street  is  that  devin  bahar  was  just  signed  to  starlites.  you  know,  the  twenty-three-year-old  model  ?  according  to  everyone  around  town  they’ve  been  said  to  be  a  bit  withdrawn  &  a  workaholic,  but  i  guess  they  make  up  for  it  by  being  so  loyal  &  charismatic.  three  things  that  would  be  used  to  describe  them  would  be  messy  silk  sheets,  red  wine,  and  staying  in  on  a  saturday  night.  i  hope  they  keep  up  to  the  expectations  of  starlites  and  don’t  get  dropped  before  they  even  take  off  !  — bella  hadid  career  claim  !
I’d  like  to  first  apologize  for  the  mess  you’re  about  to  read  and  for  if  this  turns  into  a  rambling  mess.  I’m  going  to  attempt  to  keep  this  intro  short  since  I  have  a  few  other  links  /  spots  you  can  jump  to  if  you  want  to  read  /  learn  more  about  my  bby  bean.  Anywho,  I’m  Katie,  twenty-one,  in  the  cold  af  est  timezone,  and  I  use  she/her  pronouns.
intro  trigger  warnings:  mentions  of  parental  abandonment  and  rejection,  mentions  of  depression  and  anxiety.
✧  backstory
Devin  I.  Bahar  was  born  to  Isabella  Corine  Bahar,  an  ex-model  who  retired  when  she  got  married,  becoming  far  more  attracted  to  the  ‘rich  housewife,  bow  down  to  me’  aesthetic  than  continuing  to  work,  and  Damian  Ethan  Bahar,  a  lawyer  coming  from  a  long  line  of  family  lawyers  that  were  known  for  working  important,  high-profile  cases.
The  relationship  she  holds  with  her  mother  is  strained  due  to  the  woman’s  materialistic  nature  and  her  goal  of  marrying  off  her  daughter  for  as  much  money  as  possible.  Her  eyes  are  always  on  a  far  bigger  and  shinier  prize,  no  matter  how  good  her  life  already  is.
Her  relationship  with  her  father,  miraculously,  is  healthier  than  the  one  she  has  with  her  mother,  simply  because  she  has  absolutely  no  relationship  with  the  male.  He  took  off  when  she  was  younger,  cutting  off  all  contact  with  his  daughter  without  a  second  thought  and  he  hadn’t  bothered  to  make  any  effort  to  try  and  have  a  relationship  with  her.
In  fact,  when  she  had  attempted  to  start  some  form  of  a  relationship  with  him  after  she  turned  eighteen,  he  completely  rejected  her  and  wanted  nothing  to  do  with  her  and  it  ripped  her  apart  far  more  than  she  was  willing  to  admit  to  herself  or  anyone  else.
Even  now,  she  isn’t  sure  if  the  complete  cut  in  contact  is  due  to  her  mother  or  if  it  was  simply  because  she  didn’t  live  up  to  his  expectations,  didn’t  deserve  his  love.  Either  way,  she  has  attempted  to  move  on  from  it  after  the  rejection,  even  if  she  still  has  that  small  hole  in  her  heart  over  it.
Due  to  how  strained  her  relationship  is  with  her  mother,  she  moved  out  of  the  household  the  day  she  turned  eighteen,  having  managed  to  save  up  enough  money  to  support  herself,  wanting  to  get  away  from  her  as  soon  as  possible.  However,  the  woman  is  still  her  mother  and  she  does  still  attempt  to  have  some  form  of  a  relationship  with  her,  even  if  it  sends  her  into  a  horrible  mindset  whenever  she  has  a  conversation  with  the  woman.
✧  career
She  first  began  modeling  at  the  age  of  16  for  a  commercial  project.  She  also  starred  in  the  "Swan  Sittings"  by  Lesa  Amoore,  alongside  actor  Ben  Barnes,  before  appearing  in  "Smoking  Hot"  by  Holly  Copeland.  She  also  modeled  for  Hanna  Hayes'  F/W  2013  collection,  alongside  various  other  commercial  projects,  including  campaign  work  for  Chrome  Hearts  during  2013  and  2014.
She  was  then  signed  to  IMG  Models  in  2014  and  her  career  started  shooting  off  from  there.
She  never  actually  planned  to  become  a  model,  she  actually  wanted  to  be  a  photographer  when  she  was  younger  and  planned  to  go  to  school  for  it.  When  it  came  to  the  point  where  her  focus  turned  towards  college,  she  ended  up  heading  towards  visual  arts,  fashion  design,  and  graphic  design.  Out  of  that,  she  discovered  her  passion  for  clothing  and  that’s  what  began  her  journey  of  designing  clothes,  a  project  she  started  along  with  her  modelling  career.
Since  the  start  of  her  career,  she  has  won  over  a  dozen  different  awards  that  range  over  her  multiple  different  career-interests.  Managing  to  make  a  name  for  herself  as  a  model  and  fashion  designer.
As  much  as  she  enjoys  photography,  she  puts  most  of  her  focus  onto  modelling  and  continuing  to  add  to  her  own  clothing  line  full-time.  This  leaves  photography  for  her  spare  time  as  more  of  a  hobby,  however,  she  does  step  in  to  help  other  high-profile  photographers  from  time-to-time.
✧  personality
She  identifies  as  pansexual  and  has  always  been  very  open  to  sharing  and  talking  about  her  sexuality.
Has  always  put  her  foot  forward  to  support  charities,  organizations,  and  projects  that  support  the  entire  LGBTQ  community.  Along  with  making  sure  to  put  her  focus  into  other  charities  and  organizations,  she’s  always  been  the  type  of  person  to  ‘give  back’  and  to  put  her  support  into  the  things  she  believes  in.
Devin  suffers  from  intense  depression  and  anxiety.  For  the  most  part,  you  would  never  know,  she  does  well  but,  every  once  in  a  while  she  goes  into  a  deep  rut.  She  won’t  talk  to  anyone,  doesn’t  want  anyone  around,  generally  entirely  depressing  and  doesn’t  want  to  bring  other  people  down  when  it  comes  to  it.  It  takes  a  lot  of  trust  and  a  special  type  of  friendship  for  her  to  allow  you  to  be  around  during  that  time  considering,  most  of  the  time,  she’ll  go  completely  off  the  grid  the  entire  time.  However,  at  the  same  time,  she  openly  talks  about  her  battle  with  depression  and  anxiety.  She  doesn’t  ever  want  anyone  to  feel  alone  and  she  tries  to  involve  herself  with  as  many  campaigns  and  projects  that  involve  supporting  those  with  mental  illness  as  possible.
Along  with  this,  she  also  has  this  back  and  forth  with  affection.  She  either  hates  being  touched  or  gravitates  towards  it,  it  really  depends  on  her  mental  state  at  the  time  and  the  general  relationship  she  has  with  the  other  person  involved.  It  can  be  difficult,  one  day  she’ll  be  ready  to  give  you  a  bear  hug  and  the  next  day,  she’ll  shake  if  you  try  to  shake  her  hand.
On  a  more  positive  note,  she  tries  to  be  as  positive  as  she  can,  to  a  reasonable  extent.  She  never  wants  to  take  life  far  too  seriously  but,  obviously,  doesn’t  want  to  take  it  for  granted  either.  She’s  the  type  of  person  you  go  to  if  you  want  clear-headed  advice  but  you  don’t  want  to  be  talked  down  to  at  the  same  time.  Or  if  you  want  ridiculous  jokes  while  also  getting  some  kind  of  pep-talk.
Really  the  mom-friend  but  probably  won’t  ever  admit  to  being  the  mom  friend.
✧  extra  information  and  links
blog’s  full  navigation;
you  can  find  links  to  just  about  everything  here.
full  about  page;
if  you  want  statistics,  a  more  in-depth  background,  extra  facts,  and  some  other  small  things,  head  on  over  to  her  about  page.
spotify  playlist;
it’s  a  mess  but,  i’m  always  a  big  fan  of  using  music  to  get  to  know  characters.
pinterest  board;
this  is  also  a  highkey  mess  but  you'll  be  able  to  find  organized  sections  for:  reflection,  exterior,  study,  aesthetic,  and  her  attire.
connections  page;
here’s  a  page  with  a  list  of  connection  ideas,  some  are  specific  but  most  i  tend  to  use  as  templates  for  plotting.  i’ll  also  update  this  with  any  connections.
wanted  connections  tag  &  inspo  blog;
i’m  also  terrible  at  coming  up  with  ideas  so,  i  have  a  sideblog  to  reblog  things  for  wanted  connections  (  the  link  leads  to  the  wanted  connections  tag  ),  but  it  also  has  a  tag  for  extra  muse  posts  if  you’re  interested.  i  might  actually  stop  being  lazy  and  use  some  of  these  as  inspo  links  on  my  connections  page  but  who  knows.
career  tag;
i  already  have  a  few  posts  in  here  (  and  a  few  in  my  queue  ),  if  you’re  interested.  but  devin  is  an  intense  workaholic  that  pushes  herself  far  more  than  what’s  healthy  so  i’m  pretty  sure  it’s  nearly  impossible  for  me  to  put  everything  she  has  ever  /  will  ever  work  on  in  there  but  oop  scoop.
okay,  i’m  going  to  stop  typing  now,  since  i’m  realizing  this  is  getting  longer  than  i  planned.  but  if  you’d  like  to  plot,  absolutely  feel  free  to  slide  into  my  dms  and  we  can  figure  something  out.  i’ve  got  some  coursework  i  waited  until  the  last  minute  to  start  (  again  )  so,  i’ll  be  jumping  on  and  off  while  i  try  to  get  a  good  bulk  of  it  done  !  you’re  also  totally  free  to  hit  me  up  on  d*scord  @  katie#7666  for  plotting  and  such  !
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hay-389 · 5 years
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When Hope Is Lost (Blindspot Fanfic)
A Blindspot story I’ve been working on, the rest is on Fanfic.net or Ao3. Link down below for the rest of the story.
CHAPTER ONE: Past Mistakes
If life were a person, Jane had only one question to ask; Why was it out to get her? No matter how hard she tried, no matter how many people she seemed to save, her overall actions and decisions came back to bite her in the ass. She lived in a never-ending circle of lies, and each one existed because of her. Even the ever so painful lie about being Taylor Shaw, that was her fault. The video Oscar showed her proved it. Her old self said, "you did this to yourself," the words were on constant replay in her mind. She's the one who decided to tattoo all her visible and nonvisible skin, hiding secrets within them, she's the one who drowned her entire body with ZIP, leaving no memories of even what her favorite color was, and she's the one who chose Kurt. The giant tattoo with his name on her back said it all. Jane felt betrayed by her past, maybe it was a good thing she couldn't remember. It was a fresh start. Not exactly anymore, but maybe someday it can be. Cause the fresh start she could've had was ruined the moment she accepted those damn missions. The ones that set Mayfair up for murder, and ultimately lead to her death. Jane wished she could say she saw it coming, and maybe in some small way, buried deep in her self conscience she did, but the truth was she was blindsided. She became caught up in wanting to know her past that she didn't see what her future could end up like. Jane was stupid to think that she could keep the team in the dark about Oscar. Her biggest mistake though was letting him threaten her team. She could have done more, should have. There was no way she was going to let her past choices negatively affect the only people who cared about her.
That's why she hunted him down. While she may have set up Mayfair's untimely death, Oscar pulled the trigger. Jane needed to give Mayfair and her team Justice. She would bring Oscar in, and tell them everything that happened. Like usual, life had other plans. Jane got distracted and Oscar tazed her. When she came to, she was tied down to a wooden chair, and Oscar threatened to wipe her memories once more. Everything after that was a bit foggy. Jane couldn't handle that thought, the pure idea of waking up afraid and not knowing anything about who she is again, it made her want to throw up. Jane remembered breaking out of the chair and fighting Oscar, but she doesn't remember when the fire started. Sure she could feel the hot flames feet away on her face and see the bright orange and yellow flashes dancing out of the corners of her eyes, but the bigger threat was Oscar. That's when a cry escaped his lips, confused she looked down. There had been a scythe hanging on the wall, the one Oscar had originally attacked her with, somehow she had impaled him with it. Jane didn't feel bad that she had killed him, maybe her past self would have because after all, they were engaged at one point. She must have seen the good in him at some point for her to want to marry him. If only he showed that side instead of the darker one that lead to his final moment.
After the barn incident, she headed to her safe house, which looking back is kind of ironic as it wasn't actually safe. That's where she found Kurt. The look on his face will forever be burned in her memory and hurt every time she thinks about it. He knew she wasn't Taylor. Then he arrested her. The words would always exist in a corner of her mind. "My father killed Taylor Shaw 25 years ago. Taylor Shaw is dead, now who the hell are you? Jane doe you're under arrest." The words stung in two ways. While Jane may not have known Taylor Shaw, she had a strange sadness that made her heart heavy. A poor girl who only had 5 years of life. The loving family and friends heartbroken by her abrupt disappearance. Then there was the actual arrest. Jane was no longer sad about it, but angry. If he had given her a chance to talk to him maybe she wouldn't be in this mess. She begged Kurt to listen, tried to set everything straight in the car, but once she realized he wouldn't have it she went silent. He booked her and put her in a holding cell, said he would be back tomorrow to interrogate her, but he never returned. Instead a guy Jane didn't recognize escorted her out of the FBI building and into a van. At that moment Jane knew what was happening and there was nothing she could do about it. That's why almost 3 months later she's sitting in a cement cell, waiting for the perfect moment to escape this hellish black cite.
It was sad to say that the only thing she had left anymore was her anger. It fueled her heart and brain not to give up, even when her body protested otherwise. She got used to the pain though, after a couple weeks of nonstop torture she zoned out, found a safe haven and tuned everything else out around her. It disconnected herself from reality, and if she had a choice she would stay disconnected. It's not like she has anything left to stick around for in the real world. The team hates her, Kurt hates her. Of course he does though, "you lied to him," she told herself. "If he actually cared then he wouldn't have handed you over to the CIA. The only reason he kept you around is because he thought you were Taylor."
"No, he had to or cared about me, even a little." She internally argued with herself. That's all she seemed to be doing these days, she was her own company. Jane came out of the shadows of the cell, sitting in front of Jane who was hugging her knees in the farthest corner of the room. Jane smiled, which she quickly stopped because of how much her dry and cracked lips hurt. This is what almost a day and a half of no water and food did to a person, made them hallucinate. The Jane that sat in front of her wasn't her but looked like old her. She had long hair and an evil glow in her eyes. "Then he wouldn't have handed you over. He only cares about Taylor, not you, not Jane. Now that he knows Taylor is dead, your not even a thought to him."
"He kissed me. Invited me to the park. He felt something." Jane replied, taking the bait. Her past self scoffed, "That kiss meant just as nothing as the park, he didn't bother to waste his time going, remember? He told you yourself."
"We never showed up, we can't know that he did or didn't go. Maybe he did." Jane tried to convince herself.
"But you'll never know, will you, because you chose me."A malicious smile spread across Jane's past self at that voice, and in return, she scowled. It seemed she couldn't get away from him in life or death. "Oscar," she said with as much venom in her voice as she could muster. "Kurt never loved you, he loved Taylor. You know that, so why are you fighting it? You knew it was part of the plan, you chose him."
"I'm not that person anymore."
"Of course your the same person, your memory is just stored away at the moment. It's allowing bits and pieces to slip through, but soon enough you'll remember everything, even the hatred you had for your so-called team. You'll regret it."
"I won't regret anything," Jane argued. "Yes, you will. You're going to remember the mission, and that you are the one who screwed it up. That's all you've been doing lately though huh, screwing things up. No wonder you have nobody in your life. You're pathetic. Poison. I'm glad we never got the chance to get married. I can see why Kurt gave you up to the CIA, I would have done the same thing."
"No...no he wouldn't."
"Yes, he would. They are happy to be rid of you."
"No...go. Get out of my head, leave me alone!"
The room went coldly silent. Jane glanced up, Oscar and her past self were nowhere in sight. That hadn't been the first time she's had that conversation with herself or hallucinated for that matter, but Oscar had never been in the conversation. It seems the less food and water she gets, the worse the hallucinations.
As almost on cue, one of the goons that assisted, Jake, as he liked to be called, opened her cell door, gently placing a piece of bread and bottle of water on the floor. "Make sure to drink the water slowly, or else you'll be sick," he told her, before locking her cell door again. Jane ignored the bread and went straight for the water. Although it hurt to put the bottle to her lips, the feeling of the water putting out the desert that resided in her mouth was like heaven. Never again would she take advantage of something so simple as water. Jane took the bread and slumped back into her corner, more picking at it then eating it. Tomorrow was important to Jane, and just thinking about what was to come made her stomach flip. "What if you don't succeed? You're not as tough as you were when they first brought you in?" It's something she asked herself a lot, but in the end she would have to try. Better to go out fighting than to not have tried at all. So, she scooted herself forward until she was in the center of the room. Jane unscrewed the drain pipe-that she had discovered was loose almost a week into her stay-and checked the rope dangling off the bottom to make sure it was steady and didn't need to to be woven anymore. Satisfied, she screwed it back in. Jane smiled, mostly for the freedom she was about to grant herself, but also because Keaton had no idea of the plan that was about to unfold right under his nose. He claimed to be such a great CIA agent, could detect everything. Of course Jane knew he was lying, or else he would have found out the information he needed from her already. He was definitely cocky, and Jane hated him for it. But she hated him in general, wanted to make him suffer as badly as he made her, but the look on his face tomorrow when he realizes she outsmarted him will be enough. For now though, Jane went back to her safe haven. She found it to be underneath a tree that sat a couple feet away from a cliff, which had the perfect view of a random town her brain had conceived. As she rested her head against the tree, she found it funny. This place felt like more, as if it were real, or somehow she had actually been here before. It was peaceful, it felt like home.
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Ali & Ro
Ali: Soooooo Ali: How'd your date go? Ro: I'm not sure who you meant to send this too, but perhaps try again? Ro: You can't mean me Ali: Coy, that's how you're playing it, I see Ali: Solid choice 😉 Ali: You and Drew musta been agonising over coffee options then Ro: What are you talking about, Ali? Ro: It was just a coffee stop for everyone, rehearsal fuel Ro: You know full well I've never been on a date Ali: I know full well that was just a ploy for some alone time with you Ali: and not yet but it is so clearly on the cards! Ali: I'd start dropping hints now, otherwise who knows where you'll end up Ro: Don't be ridiculous? Drew isn't remotely interested in me like that Ro: Why would he be? He has his pick of girls at school, and beyond the gates, too I'm sure Ali: Because you're you and he should be so lucky Ali: A bombshell with brains to boot Ali: Yeah, he's got a rep but he's being uncharacteristically sweet with you so, taking him at face value Ali: Anyway Ali: What do YOU think of him? More importantly Ro: Oh no no, this isn't a transformation story whereby I take off my glasses or get my braces taken off finally and am suddenly considered good enough for the protagonist Ro: Besides, I'm not even smart, just a hard worker Ro: Most importantly, he's always sweet with Meena so it's hardly uncharacteristic Ro: Other than knowing him as her kind older brother and Caleb's friend I really don't, know him that is Ali: Oh hush ignoring the fact that art is always a poor imitation of life and not the other way 'round Ali: He's love interest #1 at best, potential to be more if he sticks to his lines Ali: You're the loveable protagonist, silly Ali: Hmpf, fine. Would you like to know him better then? Ro: Of course, like I said, he's kind and sweet and Caleb's proven himself to be a good judge of character Ro: I just fail to see why he'd be interested in getting to know me, beyond being civil to me for the aforementioned reasons of mutual connections with important people Ro: He's Drew Goldsmith and I'm me Ro: We're incompatible given even the little we are both aware of concerning each other Ali: Well, I dunno about that, I think he's a fool and my evil plan is working 😏😂 Ali: Because he fancies you Ali: Potentially Ali: This stuff can defy usual logic, for better or worse, opposites CAN attract or repel in the case of humans Ali: But he wants to find out, I know this practically for a fact (of course, I haven't asked, don't worry) so its up to you to decide if you do too Ro: I have no idea what you believe you possess in terms of knowledge about his attractions or intentions but I highly doubt you're right in so far as him fancying me Ro: Sorry to say Ro: He may look like Connla of the Golden Hair but I am by no means a fairy maiden Ro: If only I could be noble born, never grow old or indeed never die Ali: Have you forgotten what happened to the last person to question my omniscience, sister? 🤔🍄💀😉 Ali: And have you also forgotten who and what you are, 'just because they told us too Ali: Cannot believe what I'm hearing here, I refuse to! Ro: of course I haven't Ro: but perhaps I should try and grow up, or at least be more realistic, when it comes to this Ali: Never! We do live in those green and pleasant hills after-all Ali: Won't stroke his ego as hard as to say UNLIMITED pleasures await but Ali: Everyone is positively like a silly child when it comes to love Ro: It isn't love though and therein lies the issue Ro: Simply a silly crush on my part and polite interest on his Ali: It rarely is at first sight Ali: and there's nothing polite about how keen he is Ali: See where it takes you, that's all Ali: he's clearly going to be hanging 'round jam seshs' and the like as long as you're about so whatever it will be, its inevitable Ro: I thought it would be, the whole charade of fireworks when our eyes collide and butterflies in my stomach. Everything clear and definite Ro: I'm afraid of whatever this is Ali: That's just horniness Ali: You just have better restraint than romance novel writers, is all Ali: Its aright to be afraid, its new and unknown Ali: Here be monsters Ro: Well that is comforting, especially if it ensures I won't fall as hard and fast as those heroines do Ro: particularly if I'm destined to do so alone Ro: Okay...but what if the monster is revealed to be me, in his eyes anyway, what if he gets to know me and doesn't like what he discovers Ali: Sure it was the corsets, poor girls could barely breathe, makes swooning all the more likely, those dastardly dandies! Ali: Then he's as bad, and ignorant (and MORE scared of the unknown than you feel right now), as every explorer who wrote natives off as savages Ali: You are far from a monster in every sensible definition Ali: Misunderstanding maketh monsters Ali: So that'd be on him, can't control other's perceptions but he isn't going to think you are, there's just no reason to Ro: I know you're right but Ro: I just suppose I wish I could control something Ali: I know Ali: Well, one thing you can control is your yay or nay to whatever he's offering up Ali: Not suggesting you have to make the first move, or put it all out on the line, 'cos he definitely will Ali: #gentleman Ro: That much is definite Ro: We should call another rehearsal, allow you to guide my vision to where yours currently reside so I'm not blindsided Ro: because I'm just not seeing what he wants with me Ali: Absolutely Ali: I'm really feeling the whole band thing too Ali: Are you enjoying it? Ro: Unexpectedly so, yes Ali: Right? I think everyone is Ali: Its something Ro: I've never played in front of that many people outside of a recital setting, I thought I'd mess up but it wasn't like that at all Ro: And everyone there seemed really into it Ro: Who knew there was so much respective talent surrounding us? Ali: Mess ups are more than welcome but you're flawless Ali: Me me me! 😊 Ali: Toying around with the idea of doing some local performances Ro: Flawless was you and Caleb Ro: I've never heard your voice so complimentary in a duet before, don't tell Marlene Ro: Oh? I think the others would be into that Ali: 💕 Ali: Might get her so raging she'd have to join us to prove you wrong Ali: I know it probably sounds a bit soon but like you said, performances are so different to practice and whatnot Ali: People would vibe Ali: There's all the places I've done solo, they'd be chill, and you know Suggs? Left School this year gone Ali: He's having a big Bday party for his gf and he's asked if I could do something Ro: Terrifying as it'd be to make a possible enemy of her, she's a very good bassist Ro: Very true, and too much practice can make it sound too rehearsed which clearly isn't what you're going for with this Ro: I heard Caleb talking to Drew about potentially performing at the restaurant so he'd be excited for sure Ro: Hm...I'm not certain I know who you mean but a gig's a gig Ro: Would he be alright with you bowing out as a soloist? Ali: She is Ali: She's gonna come around on her own tho, I know her Ali: She's just pouting Ali: Understandably, I'm not being as glib as I sound, just, we weren't right Ali: Exactly! That would be chill, you've gotta come thru with me just to get food, it's delicious and its beautiful Ali: Yeah, of course, one person can only rock out so hard solo Ali: Even if that one person is me Ali: Like, Bowie had a band, ya feel? Ro: I trust you and your intuition Ro: When's the party? Ro: I need to mentally prepare Ali: ✌ Ali: we've got 2 weeks to prep, assuming he doesn't get his arse dumped Ali: awkies, want us to play you out honey? 😂 Ro: Funeral march for his ego Ro: If the stars are good to me I'll make 2 weeks of wishes Ro: Should suffice Ali: Brilliant Ali: I'll check our charts Ali: Pull out some eyelashes if necessary Ali: The stars will fall and align for us Ro: I have faith Ro: Have you told the others yet? Ali: I haven't actually, I'll drop it in the group chat later Ali: Seeing Caleb tonight so I'll discuss the finer points with him then Ro: Good idea Ro: Oh yes, I'd forgotten it's your date night! Ali: As long as he hasn't we'll be fine 😋 Ro: Have you done his chart? If not he has perfect eyelashes to steal Ali: Not yet Ali: Been getting quizzed myself by his Ma Ali: Fair 'nuff but no time to sneak in so hey Ms Cavante, where was Caleb born and at what time exactly? #witchgirlproblems Ro: How very unfair Ro: Tonight could be the night Ro: I've already got the cards out here, questioning myself Ro: The spread's favorable for the party to go well for us as performers Ro: [Sends her a picture of the tarot] Ali: Knew we'd ace it but with the fates on our side we CANNOT fail Ali: are you asking about the Drew sitch? Ro: Perhaps Ali: I got you Ali: Keep it between you and the universe 💖 Ro: OH what are we going to wear for our first performance? Ali: THE BEST BIT Ali: We need to plan! Ali: Maybe shop! Ali: I think the party is a masquerade ball (how sweet for a hapless stoner, right?) Ali: We could run with that Ro: Well now I'm enthused Ro: Pencil me into your diary please Ali: Absolutely Ali: I think we could make better masks than we could ever find Ali: or makeup looks Ali: we will workshop this Ro: Agreed, you could create something amazing overnight Ali: We could go out and forage fresh flowers for it Ali: that would look beautiful Ro: Yes! Oh my god, we have to Ali: Perfection Ali: I'll see what the others want too Ali: Maybe we could go a galaxy glitter/paint moment on the guys but I feel like Meena would fosho want in on this floral faerie moment Ro: If you need me to start pressing any of the flowers let me know Ro: I'll make time Ali: You're an 👼 Ali: We can do it over lunch Ali: in between practicing Ali: Such busy 🐝s Ro: I don't mind I like to stay busy Ro: Do you think Drew will come to the party? Ali: Same tbh Ali: I bet he will Ali: And not to show off his musical prowess, bless him Ro: Do we need a name to perform under if we don't just want to be called 'Ali's band' by the host? Ali: Fantastic point, I don't want to be THAT lead singer Ali: So much to think on, oosh! We'll have to put the feelers out in the group chat Ali: should be something we all vibe Ro: I bet the boys will have some interesting ideas Ro: You should speak to Tommy as well, he's learn so much stage stuff at school Ro: If we're going to do this might as well make it look professional I think Ali: Agreed Ali: As long as he doesn't want to choreograph a whole girl group dance routine for us Ro: Imagine! Ro: I'd have to hide behind the piano Ali: Shy yet sultry keyboard girl prerogative Ali: I'll crowd surf my way outta there Ro: How long of a set are we going to play? Ro: There's so many potential covers not to mention the originals you and Caleb both have written Ali: Oh man Ali: we could do 20 like an opener but we are the main act, as it were, but its not that hardcore Ali: I think we could put together a 60 Ro: I hope we can all agree between us Ali: we will Ali: oh, could you cover for me with Ma tonight? Ali: she's not my bestie rn Ro: Of course Ro: I have a rare night free of any babysitting duties so it'll be simple Ali: Good, you deserve a break from the little demons Ali: I hope a book and a bubble bath are on the cards after you calm down the dragon Ro: They are indeed Ro: Perhaps I can suggest the same for her Ali: Perhaps I'm just giving myself away as twisted but that is a hilarious mental image Ali: Her grumpy face peeking out of a bubble beard Ro: Ali don't that's going to stay with me when I do get in the tub Ro: Oh no Ali: 🙊🙈 Ali: I can only apologize Ro: Cleansing that from my thoughts immediately Ro: Are you coming home at all or just straight out to see Caleb? Ali: If I do, catch me creeping up the stairs Ali: She's not been this pissy since Lachlan Ali: She's so SURE Caleb is like that and its just Ali: hilarious Ali: imagine Ro: Once she gets to know him better she'll change her mind Ro: She has to Ali: She SHOULD but will she? Ali: Stubborn old goat 😂 Ali: He's not going anywhere any time soon so if she wants to pine for Marlene that's on her but Ali: 🤷 Ro: I'll start counting cars to wish on just for her (and you), hold my breath, dig out my baby teeth, everything Ro: She just doesn't want to be a grandmother yet is all, it's no slight on Caleb personally I don't believe Ali: My vagina my choice, Mama Ali: Bless her Ali: It'd be fine if she threw out the same level of concern at...oh, idk Ali: Bea and Fraze Ali: 🙄 Ro: If she could secure us all same sex relationships she would, undoubtedly Ro: Likewise, if there was any feasible way to show Bea concern that she'd allow it'd be done Ali: When your kids don't have the good grace to be gay #gutted Ali: Yeah Ali: I need lessons on how to be a bad bitch, clearly Ro: Please don't take any lessons from Bea Ali: Its okay, I don't think she'd be willing to teach me Ro: Very true Ali: Best kept secrets and all that Ro: Speaking of, I've just received a text and must go Ali: Say no more Ali: run baby run 💚 Ro: Have fun tonight Ro: Bluebeard and I will try not to miss you too much Ali: Aww, I'll be home for snuggles lads Ali: wouldn't wanna get pregnant Ali: Laterz Ro: See you soon xx
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