#and I mean that affectionately. but i will not be tricked into believing anything about that car.

[itsmetheabnormalone]

Can everyone pls stop taking testing results seriously. Testing is a scam. You cannot trust anyone. Save your psyche and wait for Q1 Bahrain.

#I scroll down on twitter and every post contradicts the one that came before it 😭 #as a merc fan I do not perceive testing results #I distrust everyone. including lewis and toto. #and I mean that affectionately. but i will not be tricked into believing anything about that car. #neither it being bad nor it being good #f1 #formula 1

[justporo]

Hi sweetheart if your request is open I want to request a nsfw and or sfw alphabet for Astarion 🥰

Hello my sweet, Anon, and thank you! Oh exciting, I like these, so I'm happy someone asked me to do this. This will be SFW but maybe I'll do a NSFW version too - if people want it?

I used this wonderful template by @the-coldest-goodbye (thank you for making this!)

Also let's call this

Fluffy relationship headcanons about Astarion and Tav (in alphabetic order)

(Because I know the word headcanon is somewhat of a Pavlov'sch bell for some people here, hihi~)

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Very much so. Once Astarion really grabs onto the concept of having someone he deeply and truly loves, he tells them every moment of every day. He compliments them, showers them in gifts, his flirtatious behaviour never stops. But oh yeah, they also bicker like an old married couple - it's their love language.

Also he’s very keen to keep his hands on you, PDA: oh hells yeah, showing the whole world you belong to him, also you’re just that yummy.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Pure chaotic goblin energy. If you’re best friends with Astarion you’re most likely enabling each other to commit arson on a daily basis – and you love it.

You most likely stumbled over each other, each thought “what a dickhead, looks so dumb…”, figured you were equally sassy and were inseparable from there on out. Because the best friendships start with thinking “ugh, this dumb idiot…”

Also being in a relationship with Astarion means also being his best friend and having chaotic gremlin moments – like for example grouping up on Gale to shittalk him.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Cuddling is a kind of unusual concept for Astarion at first, like with any kind of non-sexual intimacy. But he very quickly figures out he loves cuddling. Just normal hugging, holding you standing behind you with his arms around your waist. But he also enjoys it so so much when he’s being held, just knowing your arms are his safe haven.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

Honestly, after everything? Yes – at least for quite some time I guess Astarion wants to settle down, have some time to figure himself out but also enjoying some mundance peace and quiet with Tav – with the biggest worry being what he’ll wear this night.

He’s shit tho at all the domestic shit. He doesn’t know how to cook or anything else and frankly he has never needed to because even before being turned he lived the comfortable live of a noble. Tav’s going to have to teach him a thing or two on how not to be so messy…

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Despite that I am 1000% convinced that Tav and Astarion are endgame… Quickly, I believe, like ripping a bandaid off, but making sure to really get the point across on why.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

The idea of commitment might scare Astarion, the idea of having Tav forever does not. So I guess he would actually come around to the idea although you both assure each other it’s not to prove something. Also Astarion does joke about it – because he loves thinking about it, to have someone who’s loving him until the end of time.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

So gentle, almost chaste, especially at first. Yeah yeah, he knows every trick in the book when it comes to sex, but exploring what a committed relationship can feel like? Sharing small moments of intimacy, opening up his feelings that he never really allowed himself to have before.

That being said I believe the first time Tav and Astarion sleep with each other after he’s freed: it’s like it’s his first time, fully there, bravely letting himself fall into your open loving arms, experiencing for the first time what it means to be this kind of intimate with someone you love more than anything else in this world.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Something he also didn’t really quite get until he shared it with Tav – and then the other ones who became his friends. He relishes hugs as something that really make him feel at peace. And he does become a hugger, at least with Tav: small, quick hugs to full-blown embraces – although these are something he likes to enjoy only with you. Oh, and they’re wonderful hugs: not too strong, not too weak, although Astarion might be a bit of a clinger, especially in the beginning, when he can never get enough.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

Tav says it first, but he’s pretty brave and pretty sure about his feelings (at least about how hard he’s fallen once he accepts the initial fact), so pretty quickly. And after that: AT. ANY. POSSIBLE. MOMENT.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Jealous, but reasonably so. Like he can obviously differentiate if you’re just friends with someone or if it might even just be flirty banter (because he’s also guilty as charges with that) but someone hits on you, you’re definitely not interested, the other person keeps pushing? He’ll be ready to rip their throat out. He gets protective. This being said, his jealousy is always focused on the other party pushing a toe out of line, not you.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Everything? Everywhere? All at once?

Of course his kisses are perfect, he likes to kiss every inch of your body and loves when you repay him for that in like. Although like with other intimate moments it’s still something new to him because there are a lot of feelings in it now.

Also Astarion and Tav love to annoy each other with giving each other big wet smooches when the other person is being annoying or just needs a lip-smacking reminder of affection.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

“You’re so gross, Astarion.”

“Why is cute, when Scratch does it, but not when I do it?”

“BECAUSE YOU’RE NOT A DOG, ASTARION!”

“I mean I could bark if you wanted me to.”

Children can be annoying them because “ugh, why are they so loud and smelly… and sticky” but Astarion loves the chaotic energy kids have. And if the other companion’s would ever bring kids over he would absolutely incite them to cause chaos all around, teach them naughty words, give them candy so they get a sugar rush when they should actually go to bed.

And Astarion is good at telling kids captivating stories, so he becomes the resident storyteller when friends with kids come visit.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?) (or in his case evenings, I figure)

Slow, full of cuddles and “five more minutes, my love, please” – basically he loves to just hang around with you in bed. He also takes his sweet time getting ready after waking up – A) because he can B) “when you look this good…”; once he figures out what Tav’s favourite hot beverage is in the morning, he’d learn how to brew it perfectly and bring it to them when he’s feeling generous.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?) (and here days, accordingly)

Even more cuddles, talking before bed, talking after going to bed, probably having lots of wine while doing so – or just lounging around reading with his head in your lap while you detangle his soft curls.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Slowly at first but then more and more. But there’s just as much for him to unpack as there is for you to learn and take in. But Astarion learns quickly that you’re a good person to open up to: he feels safe and seen with you. And even if it doesn’t fix all his trauma right away – telling you, it really helps.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

Astarion has more than a bit of temper. He can get very easily annoyed especially by little, seemingly unimportant things. He can snap at you but he tries to take a quick breather then and work through it and apologises – even though this too is something he learns slowly.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

I think he memorizes a lot about everyone anyway, because it’s a survival instinct to gather all possible information that might become helpful. But besides that: once Astarion is all aboard the relationship train, he will absolutely remember everything – probably even better than you. That’s also why he gets you the best gifts, because he listens, when you tell him something that you would like.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

He holds the memory of this first special hug very close and dear in his heart. Because he remembers how incredibly frightened he was how scary that leap was. But there you were quite literally with open arms and an open heart.

But there’s lots more moments. When you bought the house in Baldur’s Gate and he could carry you inside the first time cheekily in bridal style? The first gift you ever gave him for your first anniversary? There’sso many and he collects them like precious little treasures.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Very, oh he’s so very protective. And he will cut someone if the need arises. He might actually even be a bit too eager about it. And he likes when you’re protective of him as well – and let’s be honest you’re just as eager to keep him safe.

Nobody touches you or him – or they get the sharp end of a knife.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Everyday stuff, oh eeeeh, it’s hard. Astarion is just so not used to it, but he tries. He really does. And gifts, dates and all? Firstly, he finds out that he’s very much a romantic. Secondly, this man does not do things like this lightly, because “if we were going to be basic about it, we don’t have to do it at all”.

And he regularly outdoes himself trying to spoil you.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

As much as he tries to be open and learn. The habits of 200 years die hard. Sometimes when he feels backed into a corner he snaps and he can be very much hurtful. And as much as you want to pretend you rationally know it better, you do get angry sometimes, you do feel hurt. And you do have fights.

But at latest when tempers are cooled again, you always get back around to talking it through and learning something from it. The two of you never go to bed angry with each other – that’s an unspoken agreement.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Astarion deeply is a creature of vanity. He cares about his looks almost as much as he cares about Tav. And it can annoying, but then again: he deserves to treat himself and he deserves all the swooning and pining and compliment you can give him – and you happily supply.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Let me cite a fic of mine and although Tav says it, Astarion feels very much the same:

“I love you so much, I would give up everything for you, if only it meant I could still be with you. I would burn this whole world down if it meant, I could keep you safe. I would walk with you to the end of the universe if it was what you needed to be happy. And if I ever where to leave this earthly world behind, I believe my soul would find you again – and again and again – because I’m half and only ever whole with you.”

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

It’s hard to say that he has no regrets. And surely Astarion would never want to go through all his trauma again, but yet… in the end he met you, didn’t he?

In the end he found you and you became his light.

Sometimes he thinks about that as you lay beside him dreaming. He softly moves a strand of hair out of your closed eyes and thanks whatever God has sent you his way

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

Plainly, if they saw him in a way like probably everyone did for the past two centuries and if he felt used by them. But you’re you and would never do that.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

He doesn’t know it but he tends to be a clinger when he’s in his dreamful trance. And maybe this is only a thing he developed since the two of you have been together, but he sometimes wakes you because in his sleep he pulls you to him so you’re left with nothing but snuggling up to him – becoming his life size teddy bear.

You’d never have it any other way!

(Also sorry for swinging between Tav/you - I'm just so used to 2nd person perspective while writing, oops)

#astarion #astarion ancunin #baldur's gate 3 #fanfiction #baldur's gate iii #astarion x tav #bg3 spoilers #baldurs gate #astarion x mc #astarion x oc #astarion x reader #astarion headcanon #astarion headcanons #sfw alphabet #thought this would be like a quick fun little thing #but I guess it's also almost 2k words and it took forever #was so much fun though! #poro headcanons

[thedgeoftheuniverse]

Sinful.

Joel Miler x f!reader

word count: 2.5k

warnings: smut. literally just smut. minors DNI!!

a/n: i threw this together in all of 24 hrs, it is entirely unedited and i am still new to writing smut, pls be kind. any constructive criticism is welcomed and appreciated :))

For now, you close your eyes. Death can have you another day.

Today, you are his.

Pale morning light flickered through broken blinds, illuminating the small apartment in a soft glow that momentarily tricked you into believing you were safe. The gunfire and screams of terror, just barely audible from outside of the room, reminded you that you are not. A cruel trick, one that seemed to have the same hold day after day, your sleep-addled brain never remembering the circumstances of your existence in its first moments of consciousness. You longed for a security that no longer existed outside of the arms of your lover and he was not there to wrap them around you.

Please don’t go.

You know I have to.

The cover of night protected him during his illicit activities, but did nothing for your peace of mind. You wanted him back, damning whoever had stolen him from you last night and forced you to awake in a cold bed. 

Sleep continued to cloud your brain, lulling you back into that false security you so desperately sought in the emptiness of the bedroom. It sang a lullaby to you that sounded vaguely like his voice—you could not put a descriptor to the sound of it, you only knew it reminded you of peace—a home you had forgotten about the existence of (it never forgot you). But the gunfire was too loud, the lullaby was drowned out and you were left with a cruel reminder of your reality. It filled your mouth with gravel, choking you as you desperately tried to push it down your throat. It seemed determined to suffocate you—a reminder that what once was, would never come again, and what is now will someday kill you.

For now, you close your eyes. Death can have you another day.

Today, you are his. 

He reminds you of this when he returns to you. Large hands wrap around your waist and pull you into the hardness of his chest as his nose nestles into the softness of your neck. 

“Missed you.” He whispers hot into the skin. His breath lit a fire inside of you, one that settled in the pit of your stomach and blossomed into something all too familiar. The smallest touch from him sends you reeling. His beard, rough against the tender flesh, heightened the sensation with the tinge of pain that it brought. You thought you could die in that moment and be the happiest woman to have ever lived. He proved you wrong with a slow roll of his hips, and hands moving to roughly grip your waist. He did not know gentleness. You will not find what you are looking for in his hands, but they hold more answers than you ever dream of finding. 

“You're late.” He never gave you a time of return, but he was apologetic nonetheless.

‘

“Let me make it up to you.” He moved the hair obstructing the skin of your neck. His fingers tangled in the strands and offered a light tug that left you completely breathless. Chapped lips met velvet as he left open-mouthed kisses down the span of your neck. 

“And how do you think you're going to do that?” He was easy to rile up. He was hooked on you. You made the hydrocodone in his shirt pocket burn with jealousy. It knew it could never compare to the way your hips rolled against his, could never make him feel as blissful as you when you’re on your knees for him. He would never beg for his pills the way he begged for you.

Nothing could make him beg the way you do.

“Like this.” He whispers between his affections. Joel Miller is not an affectionate man, the last traces wiped out years before you had ever spoken his name or shared his bed, but he scrounged up what he was able for you. He would do anything for you. You had started as a means to an end—a quick release of tension, a quick fuck. When the tension was gone and you remained, he became enraptured. You had stayed long enough that he believed you were permanent. He watched you escape Death more times than he could count; he was almost foolish enough to believe that it could not catch you. It seemed more believable that you were inordinately lucky, but you being untouchable was easier to swallow than the fact that Death would one day steal you away from him.

His grinds into you, his hand tightening its grip on your waist until there are sure to be bruises left behind—a reminder of who you belong to, something he will not let you forget while he draws breath. He is the only man you would allow to leave a bruise on you and live to boast.

You would let Joel do anything he wanted to you.

The kisses that had originated on your neck began to trail down to your collarbones, your chest, in between your breasts, down the expanse of your stomach. He left behind splotches of purple to mark his descent down your body, his path of return clearly marked, all the way back to the lips that stole him from the painful reality he resided in. The scruff of his beard left a welcomed stinging sensation in its wake, a reminder that you are still human—a reminder of whose bed you are in, as if he would ever let you forget.

What Joel lacks in affection, he makes up for in patience. He likes to take his time with you, no matter how hard you plead for release. He thought you prettiest when you begged, when your body screamed with a thirst that only he could quench. While he wasted no time removing the clothes from your lower half that concealed you from him, he takes his time when you are exposed. He seems determined to draw it out today. He spent extra time in between your thighs, but not where you needed him. He left more purple—more evidence—on the insides of your thighs. It felt like a badge of honor. You intertwined yourself with the depths of Joel Miller and lived to tell the tale.

“This doesn’t feel like you're making it up to me.” You whisper as he wraps his arms around your thighs, holding you down to the bed. 

“I’m gettin’ to it.” He mutters, his head dipping between your thighs. One hand had vanished from your thighs, and moved to part your lips. He took a moment to marvel at your beauty before licking a bold stripe up your center. His tongue felt impossibly hot; you thought that you were going to burn alive from the inside as he added a moment of focus to your clit. It was begging for attention, begging for him, and who was he to further deny you the pleasure that you writhed for? His fingers toyed with your entrance while his tongue left behind kitten-like licks. He was still teasing, still trying to make you beg for the release you desperately craved.

“No, you’re teas—” His finger entering you stole away your words, a drawn out moan stealing their place. The stimulation was perfect, not enough, and too much. He always seemed just a moment too late to know what you wanted. You decided you could forgive him as the digit slowly pumped inside of you, further igniting the fire that raged in your gut; the flames tickled every nerve running from your spine and you were unable to speak. Joel nearly crumbled when he felt your velveteen walls surrounding the skin—he felt selfish for the ways he desires you. It felt almost tortuous to put his needs aside for yours, but the way you moaned and squirmed underneath him felt enough like repentance to do it without complaint. Your thighs clenching around his head, and hands in his hair made him eager to do it.

“What was that, darlin’? Couldn’t hear ya.” He barely parted from your lips to speak, and you think that he is too cocky for his own good. He knows every manner in which he can make you shatter, he uses it to his advantage, and he enjoys it—he enjoys having that control over your body. It was hard for you to blame him for it, knowing you felt the same when he was a panting, sweating, writhing mess underneath you; when you dangled pleasure on a stick in front of him and made him work towards it without it ever nearing the finish line until you finally decide to cut the string.

You know he is paying you back for it. No good deed goes unpunished—not if he has anything to say about it.

His finger never stopped working you over. Another digit was added, and he curled them to reach a devastating spot inside of you. It rendered you speechless, nothing more than a babbling mess as he increased his pace. When his mouth returned, you closed your eyes so tightly that stars danced in your vision—another reminder that the things you want will not come without a price. His digits pumped in and out of you at a relentless pace, never once losing rhythm, never giving you more than he was willing. Tonight, he is willing to give you everything—it makes you believe in God for just a moment, but you know he would never allow you something so pleasurable.

“Joel—” Your first discernible words. “Fuck— I’m gonna— Oh, God—” A prayer for something unholy to a God that you knew was not there. It was only him.

“Let it out for me.” It was the only instruction you needed. White-hot pleasure engulfed your entire being, your back attempted to arch off of the bed but was met with the resistance of Joel’s arm. You felt jolts of lightning surge through your body; the earth came to a halt and the only thing remaining was his right arm wrapped around your waist, and his left hand slowly working you through the blinding pleasure. Your thighs, still wrapped around him, began to slowly relinquish their hold as the final waves ebbed through your body, allowing him to once again breathe fresh air. The lower half of his face was damp with traces of your arousal, but he seemed unphased. 

He allowed you a moment to bask in the afterglow before he climbed back on top of you. The fact that he remained fully clothed was borderline offensive to you, so your hands found their way to the zipper of the denim that concealed him. It only took another moment before one found its way past the articles that obscured him from you.

“Someone’s eager.” He teases. He always fucking teases.

“That’s pretty bold.” You retort, your hand wrapping around the hardness of his length to punctuate your statement. It drew a sickeningly beautiful moan from his lips—it was nearly enough to send you over the edge again. “Considering you’re the one that climbed on top of me.”

Joel’s patience began wearing thin, and it showed in the way he hastily shoved off his jeans, his boxers following suit. They wound up in a crumpled pile on the bedroom floor, right beside yours. He never took his shirt off, feeling as though age had made his body inadequate and the softness of his stomach would lessen the intensity of the moment—he did not need any further reminders of the deteriorating state of his body. The way his right ear could not hear your moans in the manner it used to was enough, and he did not want you to remember that he was decaying. You already carried enough of him.

Something so sinful should not feel so holy.

He could not help the moan that escaped his lips as he pushed into you. The silk of your walls gripped his cock so beautifully—if Joel had to choose a place to spend the rest of his life, it would be here, in this bedroom, inside of you.

He knew he would not last long. His stamina was yet another reminder that his body was not what it used to be, but he swore that as long as he had hands, you would know what it meant to be satisfied. His pace was slow, but rough. He offered you no reprieve from the pleasure that consumed your body for a second time. You did not want it. You wanted him to take you how he needed, to have you in any way that made the voices shouting inside of his brain dull into a whisper, even if it was for only a second. You wanted to offer him bliss in whatever form he was able to accept it.

The slapping of skin, small grunts, and wetness squelching echoed in the bedroom. As each moment passed, the grunts turned into drawn out moans and Joel’s hips began to stutter. You knew he was close. He knew that you were as well, but not nearly as far gone as him. He remedied that by placing his hand in between your bodies—the new position caused his pace to falter more than what it already had, and his supporting arm shook underneath the added weight but he could not find the strength to care when your mouth fell open into an ‘O’ shape, and you whimpered—to rub your clit. The pressure was brutal, it shocked your body and pushed you closer to the edge of the cliff.

“Give me one more.” He whispered in your ear. “You can do it.”

His encouragement was all that you needed to dive head first into the waves of pleasure. It consumed every inch of you, and Joel took it as permission to chase his own release. His rhythm increased, working in double time, producing a symphony with the sounds that you ripped from his mouth—you had to do nothing to compose them. Bliss consumed him in the same way it did you. His body shook, his eyes were forced shut, and his mouth hung slightly open as he rode out the waves of his orgasm, fucking his spend into you. The sound it made should have been blasphemy, considering he was calling to God as though he was in the room.

He rested the full weight of his body on top of you, and the pressure grounded you as you struggled to make your way back to reality. “Am I forgiven?”

“I guess so.” You joke with him, and he scoffs as he rolls off of you. 

“‘Guess so,’ my ass.” He retorts.

The room returns to silence as you curl into his chest. The gunfire did not resume, nor did the screams and you are able to drift back into sleep with the knowledge that you are safe in your lover’s arms.

The room returns to silence as you curl into his chest. The gunfire did not resume, nor did the screams and you are able to drift back into sleep with the knowledge that you are safe in your lover’s arms.

#joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x you #joel miller smut #tlou #the last of us #the last of us hbo #joel miller fanfiction #pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #joel miller imagine

[the-fo0l]

Spencer Reid x gn!reader hcs

Notes: lotta spencer content has him as an asshole, pregnancy, angst, smut, insecure reader...so here's some classic fluff

Warnings: fluff!, earlier seasons reid +he's kind of a simp (and a bit subby ;))

the way his eyes just absolutely light up whenever he sees you <3

the man's a total genius, but only in the book-smart way, socially, he's a little...stunted

he's very much not used to any proper form of love, so you're gonna have to be a bit patient with him while he gets used to it

but believe me he is trying his very best cause he does not want to dissapoint you

at first he thought your love of his rambles was just a way to make fun of him

but since you seem to actually like listening to him talk, he'll take the opportunity to ramble to you about anything and everything on his mind

which the team appreciates, he has an outlet to rant to, someone to attend his geeky events with, and most importantly, someone reliable to support him

(they are still annoyed when he's constantly on the phone with you, meanwhile there's an active crime scene a few meters away)

before you two started dating he probably already considered you his best friend who he totally neverrrr had a crush on (sarcasm)

he was blushing, stuttering, jittery mess when he asked if he may be your boyfriend

and yes, that's how politely he asked

or at least he tried to, you had to cut off his blabbering with a "yes"

how could you ever say no to such a charming, lovable, polite young man

plus yk...he's cute as hell

the type to go out of his way to wake up early to make your coffee and breakfast just the way you like

wearing matching rings, either with each other's initials or some nerdy inside joke

he absorbedly teases the ring on his finger when he misses you

whenever someone mentions you he gets visibly more engaded in the conversation, and the team teases him like crazy for it

like, sometimes the crew'll pretend to be talking about you and watch how reid immediatly perks up from whatever file he was buried in and turns to look where the he heard your name be spoken. and he falls for it every. fucking. time

gushes to you about any new interesting books, reseach, interesting statistics, facts, events etc

in a similar vein, he'll get caught in gushing to the gang about how cool and smart and funny his partner is

rizzes you up w magic tricks

but can't handle you flirting with him, he's smiling like an idiot and bashfully looking away, with his face all red

a lot of people say he wouldn't like pda, and i get it, but i think if you've been together long enough and he feels comfortable around you he's not shy about expressing it, verbally or physically

i mean yeah, it's not "all up in your face" pda, it's with smaller affectionate gestures

vents all his thoughts, concerns and emotions out to you, and listens attentively and patiently when you have to vent

falls in love with you all over again listening to you get caught up talking about your interests/opinions

man's capable of easily retaining encyclopedias worth of info, so anything and everything you tell him gets commited to his database of a mind

be it the most insignificant gossip or tiniest detail about your childhood, you best belive he's never forgetting that shit

tries his best to not profile you or try to explain your emotions to you, but really he dosen't need to be told twice when it comes to learing the intricacies of realationship ettiquette

he's never dated anyone before and he's about as nervous as he is excited

deeply fears disappointing you, hates the thought of being a burden to you, so hearing affirmations of your love verbally means a lot

more than anything he needs a solid positive presence to help him deal with his emotions

so if he's had a really bad day, or a rough case, he comes to your front door and just totally breaks down and falls into your arms, crying into your shoulder

if anything traumatic were to happen to him, you're the first person he needs to be there

and if he woke up in a hospital bed he'd immediately start asking for you, rather frantically too

and if the event is traumatic enough, he may become a bit codependent, at least for a week during the recovery process

used to get jittery around you from nerves, now it's from the uncontainable happiness he feels being around you

his kisses are so shy and inexpirenced but also so, so needy and desperate

he'd die if you ever custom made a puzzle or quiz with questions about your relationship, like he'd be so overjoyed, literally would never shut up about it

(he'd nail it ofc)

reid usually isn't one for physical affection, like, not at all

but it's completely the opposite with you, he can't seem to keep himself away

and the guy is starved for touch...or really affection of any kind, so whenever he can, he clings onto any part of you he can

sits on your lap facing you, it's like you guys' favorite relaxing position, it's so intimate

follows you around like a puppy, all giddy and stupid with love

always holds your hand or onto your forearm while walking beside you

cuddles very close, tightly intertwined with you

you'll have to squirm and push while he just pulls himself closer into the crook of your neck

or yk just tickle his sides when he least expects it

reads to you, odds are whatever book it is, he's already read it, dozens of times over if it's a classic or scientific. he very well could just recite it but if there wasn't a book to look at, he'd have to look at you which would make him get distracted and trail off

which you'd, of course, playfully tease him for

in conclusion, you're never allowed to break up with him, i don't make the rules, it's the law

#there's just something about geniuses with a touch of the tism #dont judge okay i wrote this idk when #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fluff #criminal minds x reader #spencer reid x you #spencer reid headcanon #sorry ive been forgetting to post w school starting again #working on sum exciting stuff

[angel4astraea]

strong believer that dottore has an opposite partner. . . but realistic version !

♡ to be honest, i don't think he'd purposefully look for someone who was different. he's a literal criminal who does vile things to other human beings

♡ everything in his personal life (if he has one) is locked up tight within his own confines of his chest. he's cold but logical, meaning that brain comes over heart. .

♡ with a person who is the complete opposite, things such as personality, style, habits, thinking, etc, he'd be so irritated at first lol. as he got used to your antics, maybe he'd find them somewhat amusing. . especially if you're working under him or beside him.

♡ if you were expecting an epic romance falling, you are sorely wrong. it takes so much to even have someone be in the same space as him when he's working. he's a high and mighty harbinger, he thinks that weaknesses (human emotions) would hinder the fatui's business.

♡ but if you do crack his first shell, you'll definitely know. he'll have you write notes while he speaks aloud when experimenting. . which is huge.

♡ as soon as you do make progress, he'll probably try to push you away. it's probably involuntary as he does it with everyone and thing. if you stay, his confidence with you rises steadily. anything that seems shaky will hinder the progress.

♡ when it gets to the point where he acknowledges something is going on, he talks with you directly. he's blunt with his thoughts and feelings, telling the truth instead of hiding it beneath tricks and tribulations. when that's over with, he'll let you make a decision over a couple days as he also needs to understand the gravity of what might happen to you if he doesn't succeed with his work and goals. pierro could use that against him as blackmail and he couldn't afford to be put down.

♡ when you two do eventually start dating, dates are meticulously planned between his trips and work. he tries his best and sometimes it isn't perfect like he anticipated. even though things can fall through, he still makes sure to make you feel appreciated and loved.

♡ if he's in sumeru, he's definitely cautious when you ask to come along. but that's the time he literally took two gnosis' from nahida so he declined that round. however, he does take you under disguise once.

♡ i believe that the whole "future" talk wouldn't come up until you two are trench deep into the relationship. i'm thinking six months? eitherway, he's clear on his wishes but is willing to hear you out; he doesn't want kids but he would like to marry you. the whole murderous father thing doesn't stick well with him. . you can't blame him.

♡ if you do want kids, he won't shut you down. i mean, he could literally make a child for you and him via his vast knowledge and DNA. that's if you couldn't carry one at the very least. he'll compromise with you about kids, the cutoff is two.

♡ strong believer in the importance of traditional marriages on his end. he might not follow any ethics in the lab but when it comes to something as sacred as this, he does want something normal. i'm thinking he'd want something related to his heritage and home country, sumeru but also something snezhnayian.

♡ would prob marry you around 3 years of dating ngl. even if it seems quick (at least in my opinion), he finds normalcy in this affectionate system you two have created.

♡ bedroom wise. . i think in the early stages of the relationship, he wouldn't initiate anything for the sake of not spoiling the reveal after months of building up bliss and curiosity. i don't care, he's not as big as a whore!

♡ when you do finally get into it, he's mindful about boundaries and whatnot. he also has to be careful with his teeth because they are both pointy and sharp. he hopes you won't kick him to the couch if he accidentally forgets one too many times about his teeth.

♡ i think he's a top but it varies. like, he can be soft when you ask but he can also be rough. his actions rely on your wants, icks and emotions. as much as he likes to say he isn't great with the whole "complex human brain immediately", he still can pick up whatever you're feeling based on faces, habits and even how you breathe.

♡ in my opinion, i believe that he is banned from giving head with teeth and sex in the lab. not explaining.

♡ overall, he's a decent person to be with but it is a LOT of work.

#genshin impact #headcannon #reader #genshin smut #x reader #genshin impact x reader smut #gender neutral reader #dottore #genshin impact dottore #fatui x you #fatui x reader #yaaaas

[gummy-bearz]

Yay~ I'm glad you liked my previous request~ how about we Get more SFW and NSFW with kaede akamatsu, Celestia ludenburg along with Angie yonaga and Aoi asahina with a male S/O.

SFW / NSFW

Celestia Ludenberg / Aoi Asahina / Kaede Akamatsu / Angie Yonaga with a male S/O Headcanons

the hoeezzz gonna loveee this… (I hope)

also I won’t be writing smut of v3 characters; I’m sorry but therefore there will only be NSFW headcanons for Celeste and Hina in this, hope that’s okay!!

- mod hiyoko

SFW

Celestia Ludenberg

- She’s comfortable around you. And I mean REALLY comfortable. Celeste isn’t afraid to express her feelings around you because she knows you love her deeply no matter what. <3

- If you’re gothic lolita like her, that would be absolutely perfect. You two would decorate the whole entire house with Victorian-inspired decorations.

- If you’re not a gothic lolita, she would ask for permission before decorating the house (please say yes, that would make her so happy)

- Do NOT make this woman mad. You’ll regret it.

- Actually, she will regret it. If Celeste ever yells at you, it was probably an accident and she will apologize later.

- You watch in fear as she screams at Hifumi, however that’s your girl so you gotta cheer her on!!

- Celeste isn’t used to physical touch and it took her a while to get used to it. She was surprised when you hugged her for the first time.

- You two decided to adopt another cat so Grand Bois Chéri could have a friend! However, Celeste wanted to get a black cat. It HAD to be a black cat. It needs to fit her aesthetic.

- She finds it ridiculous when you wear her hair extensions. Ridiculous- but endearing. (You’re probably the only person allowed to touch her extensions.)

- Will she let you win at card games? Maybe.

Aoi Asahina

- She is such a sweetheart!!! She bombs you with lots of affection.

- She wakes you up early sometimes so you two can go on a jog. It’s a little irritating but it’s okay!

- If you don’t like going on jogs early in the morning, that’s totally fine with her! She respects your boundaries and won’t wake you up early again.

- She’s extremely happy that she has someone like you. Hina thought that because of her being athletic meant that she wouldn’t be in a relationship because of how “masculine” she seems. :(

- You like tricking her, she’s so gullible that she will believe absolutely ANYTHING you say. You find her reaction to being deceived hilarious.

- Aoi is really strong, she WILL carry you on her back.

- If you’re going through something, she will comfort you in the best way possible. She’ll motivate you, hug you… basically anything that will help you. Aoi just hates seeing you upset. <3

- Whenever you two get doughnuts, she likes to suggest you different types of doughnuts to try.

- This girl HATES staying up late. If shes up at like 2 a.m, she’ll get mad at herself and quickly go to sleep.

Kaede Akamatsu

- She’s a total babe, she so affectionate and loves cuddling with you. And by the way, she’s really warm too so bonus points. <3

- Kaede likes to write songs for you. It’s one of her ways of showing you affection since she just LOVES YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!

- If this girl had one wish, it would be to teach you piano. She would literally be SO SO happy if you asked her to help. Seeing you collect hobbies just makes her smile. <3

- Speaking of smiles, she literally has the most cutest smile EVER (she’s just so cuteness in general!!!). Whenever you see her smile, you feel warm inside.

- If you’re ever insecure about something, she will drown you in compliments. Kaede loves EVERYTHING about you and will do anything just to make you feel better about yourself.

- She doesn’t really care about PDA; she will show you affection in public (such as kissing, hand holding idfk) and will only stop if you ask her to. But when you two are alone she BOMBS you with affection!!

- Girl just wants to protect you no matter what- even if you can protect yourself. She just wants to keep you safe.

- She LOVES going on picnics, the environment there is perfect for her. Extra points if you make her a flower crown. <3

Angie Yonaga

- She asks if she can use you as a reference for her paintings- but this is actually just an excuse to spend time with you! (thanks to the random person who told me this in 2021, I never forgot about this amazing headcanon.)

- She will hold you in her arms and cuddle you while saying sweet and comforting things, her hugs are amazing too.

- Angie loves scented candles- she places them all around the room when painting. It brings a tranquil aura to the place though, so you don’t really mind.

- The scented candles are also there for cuddling time. She just loves them. A lot. ok anyway,,

- Her love language is physical touch, Angie loves the feeling of your skin. She doesn’t care if it’s soft, rough or anything because she will still be affectionate no matter what. <3

- Her compliments are always so endearing.

- Whenever you’re feeling down, she gives you lots of reasons to enjoy life just to make you feel better!! <3

- Angie has a very soothing voice, she likes to sing you melodic songs when you’re struggling to sleep.

- Like Kaede, she doesn’t really care about PDA. She will give you forehead and hand kisses (omg I love her sm) and will stop if you ask her too. But she BOMBS you with kisses in private.

NSFW

Celestia Ludenberg

- She’s dominant. If you try to dominate her, you’re going to fail immediately.

- Face sitting? Hell yeah.

- BDSM is a yes to her, she loves tying you up and seeing you whimper and squirm.

- Footjobs for sure, the knee-high stockings stay ON though. (She makes you wash them later.)

- Celeste is a sadist for sure, so she likes to step on you. Or she just likes to use her feet a lot…

- She loves it when you use her mouth.

- She’s more of a receiver than a giver, she barely gives you blowjobs. You just eat her out most of the time.

- When Celeste is riding you, I’d say she’s kind of belligerent? Not that aggressive enough to break your cock.

- Another thing she does is that she puts her gunmetal plated ring against your face so you can whimper due to how cold it is.

- She degrades you by calling you stuff such as her “servant”.

- Her aftercare isn’t really the best, but she’s trying at least…? If you’re feeling sore, she’ll give you a massage.

- Surprisingly skilled at using her tongue, so she’s more of a giver than a receiver.

Aoi Asahina

- Shy, but giggly.

- Literally SO loud, she’s out here releasing screams and moans.

- Her hair is down when she’s in the mood, I mean she does look good with her hair down soooo…

- You two probably fucked in the locker rooms.

- Its pretty easy to make her cum- and she also produces a lot too.

- Hina can last for a very long time, she’s got the stamina.

- She likes any position where it involves standing up. But if you don’t like being on your legs, that’s fine with her!

- Shower sex too.

- She likes being fucked against the glass, the way how her breasts push firmly against it… omg.

- Afraid of messing something up, she will constantly ask if she’s doing alright to get your approval.

- I was laughing so fucking hard when I thought of this but she has probably and unfortunately shoved a pool noodle inside of her when thinking about you.

#mod hiyoko #danganronpa #fluff #smut #male reader #x reader #aoi asahina x reader #aoi asahina #kaede akamatsu x reader #kaede akamatsu #angie yonaga #celestia ludenberg x reader #celestia ludenberg #danganronpa v3 killing harmony #danganronpa trigger happy havoc

[fandomwe1rd0]

Honestly while Rick has the emotional maturity of a 5 year old who cries because his best friend won't play with him at recess, I feel like that's not the only reason why he's so harsh to Morty and is unable to let Morty know how much he cares for him. While that's certainly part of it, I think it also has something to do with Morty himself.

He finds his attachment to this Morty in particular irrational, just Morty, not the rest of the family, but Morty in particular. He only gets jealous and possessive over Morty. He's only willing to go to extreme lengths to make sure this Morty in particular stays with him. He's only willing to sacrifice himself to Morty, he's only shown to be extremely protective of this Morty, willing to put himself in the line of gunshots as long as it means shielding Morty. He doesn't care about other Mortys. Just this Morty. This Morty in particular. His Morty. Morty literally means everything Rick, but Rick is always so harsh to Morty, to the point where Morty internalized it and doesn't believe that his grandpa loves him or even care about him at all when the truth is he does an agonizing amount. But everyone knows that already.

My question is why Morty? He insults Summer significantly less than Morty, he uses affectionate names and never insults Beth, he's kind to Birdperson and Mr. Pooopybutthole. So it's not just because he's emotionally immature since that doesn't stop him from being kind (As far as being kind goes for Rick) to other people.

It's pretty obvious to see the reason why he would never admit how much he cares about Morty. Because he doesn't want to. He doesn't want to admit to Morty, and to himself that he loves his worst enemy's grandson more than he loves anything else, including himself (Which isn't saying a lot considering he hates himself, but yk what I mean)

He's also terrified that if he shows it, Morty will leave or get hurt, seeing as that has happened with people in his past when he opened up, with Diane and Birdperson. Birdperson distances himself from Rick for a while after Rick confesses his love for Birdperson, and gets shot at his wedding despite Rick being able to bring Birdperson back, I doubt that he's able to get the image of Birdperson being shot right after he opened up to him out of his mind, he even says in season 6 episode 10 to Morty "I've become dogshit to you! This is what happens when you let people in and they stop respecting you, they touch your shit, they kill your fucking family!"

Morty leaving is one of the last things Rick wants, so that's why he keeps insulting him, thinking if he keeps Morty's confidence low enough, he'll stick around, it is incredibly unhealthy, but Rick is willing to do whatever it takes as long as it means Morty is by his side, even if it's tricking Morty into giving up his dream, whatever it takes. I also think it's due to as I mentioned before, Morty being Rick Prime's grandson, while it's not Morty's fault, I think he holds a certain amount of resentment towards Morty for being the grandson of the guy who killed his wife and child. That resentment gets mixed up with genuine care, so he just lashes out. Now while this is no excuse for anything Rick does to Morty, I think it's interesting to look at the reasons behind it, this was a long post but I hoped you enjoyed it!

#morty smith #rick sanchez #rick and morty #rick c137 #rick #and #morty

[xxsycamore]

𝐋𝐢𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠

↬ But if he gets turned on by your obedience, you get turned on by the consequences of anything but.

Theodorus van Gogh x f!Reader • rating: E (MDNI) • tags: Shoe Licking; Pet Play; Light Degradation; Dirty Talk; Master/Pet; Swearing; Light Masochism; Collars; Leashes; Rough Sex; Vaginal Penetration; Doggy Style; Squirting; Multiple Orgasms; PWP; Light dom/sub; Praise Kink • wordcount: 1, 180 • masterlist

a/n: @yanderepuck made me bark with her fic, and I was convinced by @candied-boys to write this. I forgot it was Theo's birthday, so hooray for happy accidents...and happy birthday to Theo ❤ I should write soft smut with him too some time, but...

"Lick."

You glare up at your Master behind your lashes, the tip of his shoe mere millimeters away and briefly grazing your lower lip. Theo looks stunning like that - control reeking from his form like his preferred choice of cologne, he occupies the armchair like a throne, legs crossed and chin propped up on an arm. Throwing a fit would make you a bad hondje, and you certainly wouldn't want that now…

"Hah. You got to it right away. I trained you well, my pet."

Wasn't it for the light note of entertainment in his tone, his posture would speak of boredom - but you know better than that. You know how to fascinate him, as well as how to set his blood boiling.

But he was so nice to you today. He even got you off the leash.

The leather on his shoe surprisingly doesn't taste bad on your tongue, it hardly tastes like anything at all. With how fucked-out and drunk on Theodorus you are, your brain is willing to come up with the slightest of tangs to associate with him: you want all of him, on your tongue, on your skin, everywhere you can sense him.

Too concentrated on your task of dragging your tongue on his shoes until they're all shiny and nice you could almost see your reflection in them, you barely miss the way he palms his bulge. Ah. His perversion knows no limits, humiliating you like that.

But if he gets turned on by your obedience, you get turned on by the consequences of anything but.

So while rubbing your cheek affectionately on his pointy shoe, you open your mouth to take it in… and chew.

It takes him a second or two to believe your stupidity before something so very rude and Dutch leaves his mouth. It's like music to your ears.

"You truly ARE a fucking knabbeltje, aren't you?"

Your chewtoy is taken away from you too soon as Theodorus uncrosses his legs, getting to his feet and thus coming to completely tower over your kneeling form. He's a tall man, and you're oh so close to the ground where your place is. It's so unfair.

His hands are so rough when he secures the leash back on your collar, and you fantasize about a miniature scar on the place where he clicks it on place in one haste movement. As if he didn't give you enough of those sweet reminders already.

He means to be punishing when he pulls the leash thus dragging you to where he wants you, but it's hard when you're already crawling there on your own. You climb the bed, half-expecting to hear that pets are not allowed on there - but the urgency in his body language tells you he'd rather take care of this in fastest and most convenient way - for him, that's it.

"I thought I disciplined you better. I taught you so many tricks, Hondje. Yet you still disappoint me."

"I'm sorr-AH!"

A sudden strike across your naked rear knocks the oxygen out of you momentarily, and your forehead meets the bedcovers as you struggle to keep your posture on all fours.

"Dogs don't talk. You'll have to show me that you're sorry."

You consider turning around and servicing his cock with your mouth - but such frivolity would only further disappoint him - if he put you in that position, then he wants you in that position.

Arching your back, you try to push back against Theo's frame, showing him how eager you are to take him inside. Your core is weeping for him at this point, staining his trousers as you hump against his legs.

The bed dips under the weight of his knee and the metallic clank of a belt buckle coming undone comes to your ears. Anticipating the contact, your pussy tightens and overflows with lubrication, legs parting further unintentionally.

Theo clicks his tongue and fixes your posture, his right hand remaining on your waist as the other is most probably occupied by his cock where you can't see it. Your suspicions are soon met with the affirming reality of something hard and blunt poking at your entrance. As if to rile you up, he only shallowly enters you and leaves you empty again. Only once satisfied with your whines, he pushes in all the way, and groans in satisfaction.

He sets a fast pace, with his thrusts reaching so deep inside you it feels like he's in your guts. You want him in your guts. You want to be praised for taking him so well.

"You like it like that, huh? You'll end up spraying all over my cock again."

It's like his words activate a switch in your brain that makes your body obey, because you swear you could handle him hitting your spot for longer than that. Theo must've felt the pressure build up and peak, because he pulls out at the right moment to witness his dirty prediction come true.

You feel yourself squirt and drench the man behind you, as well as the sheets. You know how bad Theo has it for you perfuming that "trick", so you don't even mind when he buries himself in your pussy right away, continuing his assault on your sensitive spots.

That's the thing, though - when he's settled on punishing you, he'd fuck you rough - but when he fucks you rough, he gets off on it.

Trying to picture it from the side, you wonder if you're the only one resembling an animal in this scenario, with Theo's groans increasing in frequency, and with his brutal pace. You love turning him into that - and even more you love it when your pussy is so good for him he can't help but curse his quickly building orgasm.

"Enjoy it while it lasts, Hondje. Once I'm done fucking your cunt I'll be making use of you in other ways, seeing that you can't help cumming around my cock even if I tell you not to."

You wish he didn’t choose to say this while you're right at the brink of yet another orgasm, but maybe he timed it on purpose. Dropping your head between your arms and sticking your ass up, you melt and moan in yet another culmination, calling out your Master's name and hoping it won't count for "talking".

Theo's trusts grow sharp and uneven, breaths coming out heavy and warning of what is to come. You expect him to still completely, tip flush against your deepest depths, but instead he pulls out in the last second, and spills on your used pussy.

The milky white torrents of cum slide down the inside of your tights, some dripping down on the bed; you whine, collapsing and moaning at the softness of the bed finally handling your weight without any of your muscles put to work - but the satisfaction is only physical as you really hoped he'd finish in you.

"You don't get a treat. You can lick it off the bedding if you wish to behave like a dog so much."

Taglist: @arsnovacadenza @ale-teodora @kimi00twin @otomelady @privilegedpancake @g-kleran    @pumpumnnnp @thesirenwashere @ravenarld @kimmy-banana @devonares @animeworldsposts @galaxyprison @sadshaxk @starshards26 @pro-cat-stination @acethephoenix256 @ikevamp-shrine-2 @nad-zeta @crystal13unny @keen19thcenturygoatsstudent @lordsister @ikemen-banshou   @themysticalbeing @canaria-blackwell @otome-scribbles @rhodolitesrose @coornn @kpop-and-otome @queen-dahlia @kisara-16 @chaosangel767 @ikemenlibrary @queengiuliettafirstlady @aurora-morning @aquagirl1978 ​ @ikemenlover24 @violettduchess @mcofthemansion @joy-the-reader @katriniac @ikemen-writer @tele86 @atelier-the-atelier @cilokgoang Let me know if you want to be tagged/untagged!

#ikemen vampire #ikevamp #ikevamp theo #ikemen vampire theo #ikemen vampire theodorus #ikevamp theodorus #ikemen vampire theodorus van gogh #ikevamp fanfic #ikevamp smut #ikemen vampire fanfic #ikemen series #ikeseries #cybird #otome

[im-abanana]

Good omens 2 SPOILERS BELOW!

Let's start off by saying that I never, EVER expected that we would get canon Ineffable Bureaucracy, but here we are, and I'm so happy about it. 🥹

Most importantly, I'd never expected Gabriel and Beelzebub to be a mirror of Aziraphale and Crowley's relationship.

In season 1, Gabriel was the absolute fucking worst.

Self-centered, lacking emphaty, superb, following Heaven's rules to the letter, without a single question, and putting his job as an Archangel (or well, the Supreme Archangel, as we've learned this season) above all else, not really thinking much about Earth, humanity or the opposition's point of view/emotions.

Not only that, but he stubbornly refused to enjoy the life Earth- or anything/anyplace else but Heaven, really- could offer him, in the material (food, music, material objects, ecc...) and emotional sense of the term too, depriving himself of real friendship and love.

Then, he meets Beelzebub in the pub and, for the first time, he feels understood. After 6000 years of bearing the sense of loneliness authority and responsibility imply, and being stuck in his own, bigoted head, he finally finds someone who gets him.

On the other hand, Aziraphale has always been a... peculiar angel, to say the least. He has learned to perfectly blend in with the humans, enjoy their creations and Earth's delicacies, such as food, good music, books, magic tricks, etc... not only that, he "associated" with Crowley, a demon/sworn enemy, since the very beginning!

In season 1, Aziraphale defied God's plan, prevented the Armageddon and disobeyed the Archangels' orders just to keep living on Earth and keep seeing Crowley. Albeit he refuses to acknowledge it, he is a rebel, way more than Gabriel's ever been in 6000 years.

And yet, which one of the two decided not to take Heaven's crap anymore?

Who said "You're casting me down to Hell? Fine, I accept my fate" peacefully, almost happily, knowing they'd finally be with their loved one?

Who ran off to Alpha Centauri?

Who gave up everything they've worked for, everything they've ever known, everything they've believed in?

Gabriel.

And Beelzebub, of course.

To say I did NOT see this coming at all is an understatement.

Gabriel, the one filled with so much prejudice, ignorance and selfishness- his royal smugness, Crowley's words- chose Beelzebub and their happiness over everything, over God, only truly knowing them for like... what, 4-5 years (which is the timeskip between season 1 and 2)?

Aziraphale, as heartwrenching as it was to see, chose Heaven over Crowley (FOR NOW). After a 6000 years-old friendship/relationship!

Perhaps, having been so "distant" from Heaven itself, Aziraphale still sees it as something that can be "fixed" if led by the right person/angel (while Gabriel, being so involved in Heaven's management for millennia, probably knows better in that regard, and basically said "fuck it"- I mean, we've seen Metatron and God's behaviour, eesh), plus he's plagued by the guilt and fear of being a bad angel, and risk to Fall.

I believe Aziraphale still sees being a demon as a bad thing, he has this internalized idea he has yet to let go of. And I hope season 3 (hopefully, we'll get it!) will cover that.

Long story short, I loved this season, and I loved how they incorporated Gabriel and Beelzebub in the story.

Some might say their romance was "too quick", and while I would've loved to see more flashbacks, I think it fits.

The Ineffable Husbands are a slow, slow slowburn, and Aziraphale truly needs a wake-up call, to see Heaven for what it truly is: toxic and rotten, as Crowley said.

On the other hand, I liked that Ineffable Bureaucracy happened so "fast"- it's a nice parallel. Gabriel and Beelzebub- people who could be so fierce, cold, nasty and closed-minded in the past- immediately saw the love they had for each other, accepted it and let it change them completely.

Let them both become so affectionate with each other, too. Like, "my sweet", "wherever Beelzebub is, is my Heaven", "where Gabriel is, is forever my Hell", "I was coming to you", "silly angel", are NOT something I thought I'd hear 'em say 😂

Nor I thought "Everyday" would be their song.

#good omens #good omens season 2 #good omens spoilers #good omens season 2 spoilers #spoilers #ineffable husbands #ineffable bureaucracy #aziraphale #crowley #beelzebub #archangel gabriel #go spoilers

[rottenbrainstuff]

BG3 playthrough - House of Hope

Man I’m getting legit sad I’m getting so close to being done.

Unpopular (?) opinion - I have read people explaining up and down and back and forth about how pressed they are that Haarlep says Raphael is bad in bed, how Haarlep is unreliable because he hates Raphael, how he’s an incubus so his standards must be very high, how Raphael is probably purposefully doing this or that because Haarlep is a spy keeping an eye on him for daddy so of course he’s not going to appear vulnerable in any way, even how sad and conflicted Raphael must be, being a cambian…

Honestly - I have zero trouble taking Haarlep at his literal word. 100%. Raphael’s house is literally full of paintings and statues of himself. He wrote an entire book that’s nothing but descriptions of different scenarios of him being crowned with the crown of Karsus. His diary entries are absolutely insufferable. He is the textbook definition of hubris and vanity. I have zero problem believing Haarlep literally. And I say all this affectionately, by the way: Raphael is one of my favourite characters in the entire game. But it’s kind of like how everyone wants to soften out all the rough edges on Astarion - I like him like this. I think it’s hilarious that he’s so vain. His hubris is so funny. His opinion of himself is so high and his confidence in his victory is so complete, but his personal incubus is sitting here lounging in his bed absolutely roasting his ass to complete strangers with very little prompting. I think he’s a great devil character and I don’t want to make up excuses for his behaviour in order to humanize him. I definitely do love complicated antagonists who have more to them than it first appears, but honestly I just do not get that vibe from him. And I love him for it.

Haarlep was so funny btw. I just love it when actors are having fun. That must have been so funny to come in and voice the character, like, ok so for today, you’re doing the same voice as before, except make it slutty and bitchy this time. It makes sense I guess that Haarlep can change into a female form if you want, of course he can, and I think it’s funny that even when Raphael wants to shake things up a bit, it’s still with a version of himself, but myeh, that whole thing felt to me like a “hey don’t worry if you’re icked out, we have a girl option too that we can totally switch to if you want.” Maybe I’ve just read too many forum arguments about how there’s too many gay people in this game and people are crying to have a toggle to turn it off, and it makes me hostile to anything that smacks of trying to soothe people’s hurt heterosexuality. (because like, theoretically there could be lesbians who object to the scene as well?) Oh well. Still funny in the end. I was going to go through with just sleeping with Haarlep to avoid a fight, because that’s the direction my tav generally likes to go, but then Astarion got very concerned and made me feel bad, so I changed my mind.

Well this whole area was fun. I loved Raphael’s house. I loved all the details. I loved the debtors, the tacky ostentatious bullshit in every corner, I loved the rotten banquet. Is that its natural state and he charmed it to look fresh when I arrived? (disgusting, I love it) Or has he just been so pissy about whatever went wrong with the skeleton folks at the table that he’s never bothered to have it cleared and has left it there in a temper tantrum as a lesson? (ridiculous, I also love it) I love how absolutely, singularly obsessed Raphael is with my party. I know it’s because we are the means by which he thinks he is going to get that crown, but it also feels personal and weird and uncomfortable. I love that my contract has this place of honour in his archive. It’s almost touching, if it wasn’t my fucking soul. I love how absolutely self-assured Raphael is, how confident he is that his plan is going to work, how the possibility of a failure or a trick, like, he doesn’t even have the capacity to consider that a possibility. It SO GODAMNED FUNNY to kick his ego-inflated ass when he was SO FUCKING SURE that he would win. Raphael you are such an insufferable idiot. I love him. I’m so glad the VA won a Bafta.

The Raphael fight is tricky, but honestly, half of the trick is that before you even get there, you have to fight your way to the foyer past the most annoying enemies. I guess Hope’s divine intervention which can restore your spells and HP helps to balance that out though.

It was surprising to see I was able to get Yurgir to side with me in the fight - I had assumed he’d be SO fucking pissed after I tricked him in the Shar gauntlet. Now I have an additional ally in the big brain fight! …except he really wasn’t all that helpful in the Raphael fight, not at all. He’d go invisible, pop out of invisibility, knife someone for maybe 7 HP, then pop invisible again. I guess every little bit helps but…? Come on dude. At least stay visible so you can soak some hits.

Apparently it’s possible to make Korilla survive the fight? I was… NOT able to do that. You get some extra dialogue if you do, but the fight is hard enough to win even without trying to manage a hostile NPC who is usually the first one Yurgir targets. Sorry Hope, sorry Korilla. How come you can cast Otto’s Irresistible Dance on Raphael, and it will incapacitate him, but it won’t make him actually boogie? I was so excited to see him dance, and then he didn’t, he just stands there.

It doesn’t even need to be said - Raphael’s fight song is of course amazing, chef’s kiss, perfection.

Anyway, bard vs bard fight, very fun, when you kill him Raphael crumples dramatically to the ground, I love the big boss fights in this game.

Coming back, I got a stupid lecture from the Emperor about how naughty naughty I was being. Sure asshole, lecture me about trust, that’s really rich coming from the guy who didn’t trust ME with anything, and I had to pry the truth out, unwillingly, in stages. I can’t fucking wait to doublecross that guy.

If you attack Helsik, Raphael’s boss song also plays? That was… a little bit strange! I wanted to see what was in her basement, but the fight with all the gilded imps and Minotaurs and whatnot was such a pain I didn’t bother. Apparently you can access the basement through Dammon’s basement anyways, if you really want to see it, so. I DID make sure to pickpocket those gauntlets back off her cause I want them.

Mannnn. I’m almost done the game. WTF. All I have left to do is go give Mol her contract, talk to Voss in the undercity and piss off the Emperor, get my poop in a group and… that’s it. I’m off to fight the brain. I’ve been playing this playthrough for six months, and I’m almost done.

#bg3 #bg3 raphael #bg3 playthrough #bg3 spoilers #baldur's gate 3

[hausofanya]

┈─ 𖧷 i think i knew you in a past life . every time my soul sees yours, it trembles with knowing . AKA F8TE, an eight ( including cléo ) member friend group consisting of producers, dancers, idols, actors, and more who found each other through each other and are now affectionately dubbed by fans as THE REAL HOUSEWIVES ( & HUSBANDS ) OF SOUTH KOREA.

XAVIER KENT ⸝⸝ aries. ‘98. rapper & producer under JYP ENTERTAINMENT. stage name : KNIGHTX ( can be pronounced as either knights or knight x. ) resident sweetheart, big hugger, has had a ‘minor’ crush on cléo that fans think isn’t very minor due to fans figuring out cléo voices his producer tag. 1/3 of the STAR TRIO. with cléo and moniq.

HOW DO YOU KNOW CLÉO? ‘ was introduced to her by family when i was around eight years old. you know, kids in the same age group play together and all that. we pretty much stuck to the hip after that. but she’s always been more than just a family friend to me. she’s been a fixture in my life for years. ’

MONIQA LE FLEUR ⸝⸝ leo. ‘98. soloist under JYP ENTERTAINMENT. stage name : MONIQ. ( pronounced as monique. ) unanimously voted as group mom, has a soft spot for both cléo and xavier. dotes on cléo so much fans also believe something romantic is happening between the two. 1/3 of the STAR TRIO with cléo and xavier.

HOW DO YOU KNOW CLÉO? : ‘ we’ve been best friends since we were babies. we practically slept in the same crib — she’s my other half. i’d do anything for her, and i know she’d do the same for me. ’

MALAKAI ST. JAMES ⸝⸝ gemini. ‘99. vlogger, ‘part time actor’. online persona : SAINT KAI. the group ‘trouble maker’, though it’s mostly because he finds himself in odd situations as an odd sort of superpower. famous online as ‘that one guy who didn’t flinch while playing five nights at freddy’s’ and regularly has beef with at least one character in the games he plays. ( ex : bonnie. ) when he’s not gaming, his vlogging channel is complete 180 to his other, depicting a peaceful life and many, many plants. started his acting career when he tagged alongside a friend to an audition and wooed the casting director enough to land a minor role, catapulting him to even higher heights of fame.

HOW DO YOU KNOW CLÉO? ‘ xav introduced us when he heard she watched my fnaf play throug. we originally bonded over two player games, and our friendship’s been going strong ever since. sweet kid, but don’t let her cute face fool you. she wiped the floor with my ass in smash once and i still haven’t recovered. she’s kind of a beast, haha. ’

MALANI ROSE SINCLAIR ⸝⸝ libra. ‘99. leader, main vocalist, and lead dancer of five member girl group HONI under JYP ENTERTAINMENT. stage name : LANI. everyone agrees that if cléo wasn’t known as the youngest of the group, she could definitely be mistaken as such. soft voiced with a big heart, but fiercely protective of those she holds dear. mess with lani and HSK will bury your body and put you on a tshirt.

HOW DO YOU KNOW CLÉO? ‘ she had debuted before me and i was just looking for friends, honestly. the idol industry is huge and daunting without a friend. that was cléo for me. she would smuggle snacks in and we would escape to the roof and just talk about everything under the moon. ’

DANTE ANDERSON - LEWIS ⸝⸝ scorpio. ‘99. a part of an impressive dance crew called THE ROYAL FAMILY. one look at him and you can tell the mischief in his eyes and smile go way beyond tricks and pranks. self titled ladies’ man, whatever that means, and flirts with anyone. ( the rizzness was written about him. ) known to fans as ‘that one guy who gave cléo her first dating scandal’ much to his delight and her poorly hidden fondness masked as exasperation.

HOW DO YOU KNOWN CLÉO? ‘ we worked on a stage together. a really sick production. was a backup dancer for many of her stages beforehand but we hadn’t really connected until then. she handed me a water bottle after practice and asked to go over the routine one more time, and the rest was history. ’

XIOMARA MAWUSI ⸝⸝ taurus. ‘00. main dancer and lead singer and rapper in six member girl group VIX ( also read has 6IX ) under BE:LIFT LAB. stage name : XIOMARA. this girl is a force to be reckoned with, from her stage presence to her alluring flow in both singing and rapping. she’s the hardest to get a grip on in the group, preferring to be shrouded in mystery, but behind closed doors can be the most caring person you could ever come across. even if her actions can be questionable at first.

HOW DO YOU KNOW CLÉO? ‘ met her through her twin, which was kinda creepy at first. like my first thought was, ‘why did alexei come back in a wig?’ sweet girl, makes killer cookies. could solve world peace with those. they’re what won me over, honestly. let me not even lie. ’

ALEXEINDRE TORELL ⸝⸝ cancer. ‘00. main rapper and lead dancer of six member boy group TOMORROW X TOGETHER. stage name : ALEXEI. cléo’s twin brother who loves to tout that he was born mere minutes before she was, much to her dismay. the two get along ridiculously well despite what they show on camera, and they often claim telepathy as the reason why they act so eerily similar. most of their synchronized interactions aren’t planned though, so they prefer to render their audience speechless the fun way.

HOW DO YOU KNOW CLÉO? ‘ how wouldn’t i know cléo? it’s unfortunate, really. sometimes i wish i ate her in the womb. the bane of my existence. i would kill for her. don’t listen to niq when she claims to be her other half. i’m literally right here and breathing. ’

#fictional idol addition #fictional idol oc #fictional idol community #fictional characters #fictional idol group #fictional kpop oc #fictional kpop idol #fictional kpop community #skz female oc #skz added member #skz oc #skz 9th member #skz female member #skz addition #skz female addition #stray kids added member #stray kids female oc #stray kids addition #stray kids female addition #stray kids oc #stray kids 9th member #stray kids female member

[thaly-does]

Is it just me or the tbosbas movie is doing a poor job at framing it's own meanings? Especially in impicturing Snow?

Like, are we as the audience supposed to believe in his romance? In his care for what's left of his family? Barely. But are we supposed to watch him rise socially while his moral downfall is happening and be in our power to judge and convict? Even less so.

He's framed at the same time to be sympathetic and unsympathetic. It could've been poetic, I think, if it wasn't so confusing. Too much.

We see him both being calculating, cold-hearted, cruel, rational - and acting emotionally, affectionately even. Although these traits do not necessarily contradict each other in a person, they do in Coriolanus Snow.

Mostly because the camera - angles, colours, sounds - frames his affectionate "good person" moments as light, warm and true. It's close-up shots and eyes and warm palettes - like his moments with Lucy, especially already in 12, or when he does the handkerchief trick, or coming to Sejanus in the arena. The picture frames this as "he's a good person deep down" even when his words are terrifying.

On the contrary, his "bad person" moves which seem to be calculated and rationally approved are framed as full of hesitation and doubt and worries. He doesn't seem to do anything purely framed as "bad" for the audience. He's either lost or regretful or anguished.

At the same time the story clearly follows the path to depicting Snow's character arc as the birth of the villain. He clearly lives to be the antagonist of THG.

So how could it be we are constantly confused about his motifs and intentions? Confused about who he really is right when he states his personality as the future dictator and murderer? How could camera work and editing make something totally awful look excusable, even likeable?

That, probably, is a good hg question.

But, still, please tell me the book had it differently. The book is not visual. It shouldn't do this. Please please please?

#the ballad of songbirds and snakes #tbosas #tbosbas #coriolanus snow

[jujutsukgojo]

Magic Man

Summary: Who was once a failing magician, ended up finding the spark he needed in the worst way.

How Atsuhiro Sako became the villain called Mr. Compress.

A/N: Major character death, abuse of authority, origin story, unemployment, murder, violence.

If you are sensitive to these things, please avoid!

Once again, Atsuhiro walks off the stage in shame. This is the second time he was booed. A showman with tricks is always welcomed. At least it was until lately. He cannot figure out what went wrong! Is it the obviousness of his quirk? Making things magically appear can be tricky to figure out. Then again, in today's world, anything can be explained.     

No one believes in magic anymore. Especially with quirks running around. Sighing, he goes home and silently hopes he doesn’t see the lovely you, his dearest friend. He opens the door to his apartment and smells pancakes. That can only mean two things: you broke in and he is out of ingredients for everything else.     

Atsuhiro comes from behind you and wraps his arms around your middle. Humming in acknowledgement, you rub the top of his head. After asking how he is, your affectionate friend cannot say. It doesn’t take the smartest person to figure out what happened.     

“Don’t worry, magic man," A nickname you gave him years ago that stuck ever since. It fit him greatly since he became a magician and didn't just use it for a hobby. "Everything will be okay!” Your voice is reassuring as hell. It always is. Sometimes he wishes you were honest about your feelings about him.  

How long has he carried a torch for you? Do you feel the same? He is quite the loser, so no way could you be experiencing the butterflies that soar within him when he knows you’re there. He doesn't even need to see you for him to feel this way. Luckily, his ways of being affectionate towards you is welcomed. An excuse to hold you without it being too forward.   

It is embarrassing to hope that you’d give him the time of day.   

  “Out of stuff?” He asks without removing himself from your body. “Yes. But don’t worry,” There you go again. “I made pancakes! And there is honey, just how you like them.” Handing him a plate with a smile, you go back to flipping more for yourself.     

  Another thing about you: you serve him food first whenever you see him. Not just with food either. It's with everything. To him, it shows how much you are covering yourself. Your lack of honesty can be suffocating at times.  Be selfish, be honest! It's okay to complain to me.  

He sits down and doesn’t touch a thing. Atsuhiro waits for you as always. A few seconds later, you sit in front of him and cover your pancakes with the sweet gold. It was something you picked up from him over the years.     

  The two of you eat in silence for what feels like forever. There is something in the air, something unsaid that he is a little leery against. “Buddy, what do you think of me helping you out?”    

There it is.     

“I am getting a promotion and I want to help you.” He wants you to be honest, to be free from those chains of yours because you spare him. But why does this sting? Is it the embarrassment?

“No.”   

“Don’t be prideful. There isn’t anything wrong with a woman working.” There truly isn’t. This is not about that though. This is about his own pride and failure. You working extra to support him is leaving a bitterness in his chest. “I know there isn’t. It’s not about that.”    

“Then what?” You put your last bite in your mouth. Your eyes trail to the last pancake. Quickly you look away and try to start the conversation again. Of course, you save the last for him. Yes, you have your own place and food. However, you sitting here in front of him hungry creates a frustration like no other. Not at you, but the situation. It feels like salt rubbing into the wound. He knows you mean well. You always do.  

He feels like screaming. He takes the pancake and places it on your plate. “Eat.”    

“You’re still hungry-”    

“Eat it. I’m not hungry.”    

“It’ll be fine.” You grab his hand and squeeze it. "Besides, I don't even live here. You don't need to feed me." Looking up at him with such wonder reminds him of how you met. In his younger years he was performing tricks on the street. There were a few people in his audience but none of them held such a look. Complete awe of him, not towards his great-great grandfather. No, just him.   You clapped and cheered him on. Doing that was amazingly flattering.   

   He gets up from the table and puts the last bit of honey on your fluffy pancake. Atsuhiro cuts it up and puts a piece in your mouth. Then he says, “If you want to, then fine.”    

As much as it bothers him because of it feeling like a testament of his failure, he won’t let you go through this. If you are willing to work harder for his sake, then why should he make it harder for you by not helping? Soon, he will look for a proper job. When he does, you won't have to worry about him anymore.   

At night, when it is time for bed and for the moon to shine, you wrap your arms around him and lay your head on his back. His heart flutters in his chest. “I don’t regret you, never forget that.”    

He removes himself for a moment and gets on his knees so he can bury his face in your middle. “You’re my goddess. Forgive me for it all.” He hears a slight gasp. He has always been affectionate, so you have gotten quite used to it. Though the declaration is on another level of sweetness. Being viewed as a deity to a dear friend is a lot to think about.    

“Always.”    

He applies for job after job. No one is biting.     

Every time he is rejected, he remembers his grandfather telling him about his grandfather. How the great villain was capable of doing wonderous things, like Robin Hood. How the man was liberated and yet kind; loved and respected but fearsome.      

  He always looked up to his great-great grandfather. Their quirks are so similar too. What he didn’t like was how people thought of him. Since he is a little older, he lets their opinions go; whether good or bad.

One more time, he thinks. If one more job denies him, he has no reservations then. You'll understand. He won’t kill anyone, hopefully. Atsuhiro can’t imagine the face you would make if you discovered blood on his character. The knowledge of him murdering someone would devastate you. Crimes like murder could ruin the relationship.   

“Perhaps you shouldn’t know then...” He mutters.  

Thinking about his plan b has him remembering when he told you of his heritage. Only that he came from a villain and a family that supported the man’s rampage. You said you held nothing against him. In fact, what you had responded with is: 'How can you blame the child for the sins of his father?'  

Atsuhiro admired you for that. It made him feel good that you didn’t judge or compare him. How many times did people realize who he was related to and cursed him? It was always hero fans, too. Always, it is the hero society that scorns who they consider the lesser beings. Although he has never committed an illegal act, he has had a horrible experience with heroes.  

    Atsuhiro takes a deep breath. That ill feeling still lingers about that. It has been-what?- twenty years or so? 

Cracking his neck, he goes home after another turn down. Sucking his teeth, Atsuhiro is done.    

You don’t come over. Hunched over his table, he fixes a mask out of the material he had from a spare costume then paints it white with a basic design in black. Shoving his feet into his boots, he takes one last look in the mirror. It is his stage costume he always wears for shows.  An orangish button up with a vest, and a hat to top it off. Something fun that grabs the attention of the audience.  

Might as well wear it now. Leaving his house, he turns off the lights.     

His plan is simple. Just rob a couple of people! Nothing extreme or totally dangerous. Before he can walk up to an unsuspecting man, he sees where the mister’s line of sight was. A crime scene that was littered with heroes and officers. Not too long after does he recognize the place.     

Your job.     

Ripping off his mask, he runs to it. Atsuhiro grabs people to look at their face, hoping one is you. They complain about him as he quickly searches for you. The ambulance carries a couple of crying nobodies that tell of the horrific crime. A rogue hero lost his temper and crashed the place.     

Then, Atsuhiro sees you on the ground. Still behind the yellow tape, he pushes past people to get to you. No, no, it can't be you! Not now. Not here. Not like this. As soon as he touches the tape, a hero in blue grabs your shirt, easily lifting you off the ground. “Ain’t this a pretty pity?”   

Your neck cannot support your head. It dangles and your eyes meet his hazel ones. You don’t blink or move.   

“I love you.” Is what you mouth. Atsuhiro screams that you’re still alive. The hero carrying you so disrespectfully, whips around. Whether it was unintentional or not, that action caused you to hit your head on debris, letting out a sickening crunch.    

“Oh shit.”    

“It’s whatever. This cannot go out to the public anyway.” An official says next to him. The hero looks down with a sad face. The man in blue tights lifts you up higher and carries you bridal style. As if that is supposed to help anyone.   

That is how you were taken from him. By heroes that didn’t give a damn about anyone but themselves. But you, oh you...are something totally different. Patient, kind, the love of his life. His greatest friend. And he never got to tell you he loved you. That you were the reason for his every breath. He lived just for the sight of you. Messy or clean, clumsy or graceful, it never mattered. Dolled up or not, you were a goddess for mankind. It was an honor to have been so close to you.    

You're dead, aren't you?   

And you loved him too.   

Later, your family collected your remains. He attended the service and left without a word.    

Weeks, later did he find his laugh. Atsuhiro stood on several stages and performed without a boo from the crowd. This wasn't what he wanted. No, he wanted another form of audience. One that causes him to itch and claw his chest. A scream in his throat that he can't place.

Before he struggled with performing. Could your death have been the cause for this extra flair? The confidence and commanding presence of his is new. He was never shy but he wasn't bold.  

Now, his work has changed. And he hates it.  

On the news, your death was not covered. The incident went without acknowledgement. The temperamental hero was not dealt with publicly or at all. Your family never got closure for your death. No one has. However, Atsuhiro got information in immoral ways covered in blood. The hero that killed you shared an agency with the other. Apparently, both are on sabbatical. Fortunately, it was nothing for him to find both of them.    

Knot and Fury, are their names. Completely tacky. Fury stands by his name as he is easy to set off while Knot had a squeaky-clean record. Atsuhiro doesn’t believe that for a second. The way Knot handled you said it all.    

First, Atsuhiro wants to deal with them, then the agency. How irresponsible could they have been? Do heroes not check up on themselves? Letting bastards like them run the streets is insane.    

He stalks the one that was in blue, Knot. The one that killed you. Don’t misunderstand, it is possible that you were a dead person anyway; that isn’t the issue. The issue is that he did kill you. This so called hero grabbed you without a care, didn’t even attempt to save you, killed you, and of course, instead of helping you the gross bastard commented on your looks.    

Pretty pity. Knot had said that to you. Who does that?!   

Atsuhiro watches him enter Fury’s obnoxious looking house. So, Atsuhiro waits for them to have a sense of security. Why not? Surely that is how you felt when you saw them. Believed you were safe until terror struck.    

Finally, a few hours later, he enters the unlocked house to deal with them. Lounging around with beer, the two say nothing. Knot has his head down, almost like he is ashamed. But Atsuhiro does not believe him. Fury is frowning and tapping his finger on the couch.    

Fearlessly, Atsuhiro comes before them with his mask on.    

“We know why.” And he did it. Painfully, slowly, and happily.    

The same day, he had arrived at the agency with a lighter load on his shoulders and a pep in his step. Knowing that he done a public service is a nice feeling. Vengeance for your poor soul was almost complete.  

Should the agency suffer from their sins? Maybe not. Then again, they knew of the duo's crooked ways. They knew of your murder and yet they let them go. Where was your justice? Or everyone else's that were present at the time? Why is there so much corruption?  

With an exaggerated panache, he appears before the majority of the agency. Releasing marbles of various objects, people scream. He laughs and smiles at the chaos. This is a performance of a lifetime. One question pops up and only once: his name.     

“Dearie, I'm Mr. Compress.”   

It is a fitting name for a magic man like himself.

#Mr. Compress #atsuhiro sako x reader #sako atsuhiro #bnha #mha #sako atsuhiro x reader #mr. compress x reader #heroes suck in this #origin story #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #bnha mr compress #mha mr compress #atsuhiro x reader

[faewritesfanfic]

Eden Overthinks

It was a Saturday, and Bailey and Eden were in an old crypt in the woods, looking for antiques to sell to the museum. Kore was in the woods nearby, foraging for food for the coming week.

Between the hunters, and the traps, this was probably the least dangerous part of the week for all of them.

"Okay, what's got you in a mood?" Bailey asked Eden as the wild youth smashed a truly much too large spider to death with a rock. "What have you got to be upset about? I know for a fact you had a fantastic week. The whole orphanage knows."

Eden grunted a non-commital response as he bashed the spider one more time for good measure. The week had not, in fact, been fantastic. It had been un-fucking-believable. The week had started with Kore climbing into his bed half naked, asking him to take her virginity. Every fear he'd had about breaking her had been assuaged as she rallied time and again to keep up with him in all aspects. Sexually she was eager to experiment with new ways of pleasing him when her sex drive failed to match up to his. If she had a problem with his possessiveness, she didn't show it. Kore had failed to react at all when Eden picked up and moved the person sitting next to her in English so he could take the spot. She was openly affectionate, holding his hand in public, and kissing him on the cheek when they would part ways. Kore didn't seem to notice the people staring, the people watching and wondering how a freak like him got a girl like her.

It was unbelievable.

"I think Kore is playing a trick on me." Eden grumbled at last, putting down the rock and picking up his flashlight.

"What do you mean?" Bailey asked as they started to move. While Eden held the flashlight, Bailey used a long stick to check in front of them for traps for loose ground. "Did something happen?"

Eden frowned as he considered his response. Yeah, a lot had happened. None of it seemed real.

The flashlight caught on a branching path and illuminated a burial chamber. Bailey's stick caught on a trip wire, a volley of darts shooting through the air in front of the boys as they held their breath.

"Kore called me her boyfriend." Eden said at last as they cautiously entered the room. Rings and trinkets lined the walls, but Eden left those to Bailey as he went to inspect the sarcophagus at the end of the room.

"How's that a trick?" Bailey asked, shoving ancient treasures into a backpack he had stolen from a sleeping tourist on a bus. "You have a strange way of bragging. You know that, right?"

Eden glared at Bailey, but they were both still for a moment as Eden reached down and pried the sarcophagus lid open. "Just a corpse." Eden announced as he ran his flashlight over the contents. Once they had opened a coffin and a pale thing with too many legs had jumped out and tried to attach itself to Bailey's face. They hoped to never encounter one again. "Anyway, I'm not bragging."

"Oh, yeah, you're totally not bragging." Bailey snorted, rummaging through the sarcophagus for anything potentially valuable. "Oh, look at me! I'm Eden! The girl I've liked since I was ten likes me back, and we have really loud sex every night tha--"

Eden jabbed Bailey in the ribs, causing the smaller orphan to yelp and shatter a few bones into dust accidently.

"Oiy!" Bailey snapped, shaking his hands to get the old dead guy off. "What was that for?!"

"There's no way this is real!" Eden snapped back, his expression sullen and bitter.

He knew it was the truth. There was no way Kore really wanted him. She deserved the world, and someone who could give it to her. Whatever game she was playing, she would tire of it soon. Eden just wanted to enjoy the time he had with her while he could.

"No way what's real?" Bailey demanded. "The sex, the relationship, what? Cuz it looks real to everyone who has to watch you two."

"None of it! None of it is real!" Eden shot back, feeling sick to say it. He liked the lie. He liked the world where Kore really cared about him, and he got to be with her, and things were just good. Everything else in his life had been such a struggle that he just wanted this one thing to be easy.

But it wasn't.

"So, you're telling me that Kore, our Kore, climbed into bed with you and started acting like you were dating for, what? Shits and giggles?" Bailey asked, his tone dangerously flat.

Eden's mouth goes dry, and he understands why Bailey slams his fist into his jaw.

"I deserved that." Eden groans as he spits blood. He seems to still have all his teeth, but his cheek was cut open in his mouth.

"Yeah you fucking did!" Bailey spits, wringing his sore hand. "That's Kore you're talking about! No one says shit like that about her. If anyone else had said that you would have ripped them apart!"

He was right. Eden would never have let anyone else disparage Kore like that. "It just... doesn't make sense." Eden mumbles. He slumps down against the sarcophagus, head hung in shame.

Bailey drops to the ground next to Eden, still nursing his hand. "What doesn't make sense about it?"

"Just, everythi--"

"No, no." Bailey stopped Eden. "You're being stupid. I know there's no fixing stupid, but fuck it, I'm gonna try. So explain it to me. What about Kore wanting to be with you doesn't make sense?"

Bailey could be such a smug little asshole. "She could be with anyone she wants!" Eden snapped.

"She wants to be with you." Bailey countered calmly. "Next."

Eden pursed his lips and glowered at Bailey, not sure if he wanted to play this game. "She's asexual."

"And?" Bailey arches a brow, as if to tell Eden to tread carefully. Bailey himself identified as an aromantic asexual. "She still wants to be with you. What do you think that means?"

"That..." It really was hard to parse these out when Eden had to explain them. "I'm her best friend and I'm safe to check with?"

"Do I need to hit you again?" Bailey growls.

"No." Eden sighs. "I guess I just can't imagine why she would want to be with me. She could do so much better than me."

"I know. It's freaky." Bailey says. "No one has any idea what she sees in you."

"How is this helping?" Eden demands.

"Well obvious she sees something in you worth loving!" Bailey says with a shrug. "If you're not sure what it is, maybe you should ask her?"

The idea hung in the air for a moment. "Oh." Eden finally says.

Really, that was the end of the discussion. It seemed like such a simple solution to Eden. All he had to do was ask Kore why she cared about him. It was easy.

So why was it so terrifying?

#degrees of lewdity #eden the hunter #bailey the caretaker #kore the gardener #alternate universe #fanfic

[hughungrybear]

Me watching Cherry Magic Thailand Ep. 8:

Thank gods I still have this series to look forward to after all the stress the latest episode of The Sign gave me 😂😂😂

1. Look at Rock attacking Pai's weakness for delicious food 😂😂😂 Unofficial date, scored! Also, if boss does not want his employees to date each other, he should stop giving them A SHARED restaurant gift voucher 😅 (Sidenote: I know Jan is a real foodie so it easy to believe she'll fall for this kind of trick irl 😆)

2. Madam Noi *on Jinta practising his bf speech with her*: Not a chance, sir (sashays away) 😂😂😂

3. Min, stop (affectionately) attacking Jinta - he is an old man, his heart might not be able to take it 🤣🤣🤣

4. *Karan taking photos* No, that's just Tay being Tay Tawan 😂😂😂

5. *On the boss thirdwheeling Rock and Pai's not-date* Now, it makes sense lol 😂😂😂 Poor Rock and he was so excited to be with Pai too 😭😭😭

6. Nooooo, Achi explain things to Karan quickly 😭😭😭 He WILL GET THE WRONG IDEA <after 5 minutes> Thank god. Also, it is so sweet and so valid of Karan to choose Achi. I mean, he is the best sales person in their company. He knows he has the ability to find work and excel anywhere else - but he can never find another Achi 😭😭😭

7. Look at Jinta being so extra for an effing decorative toy 😅 <after 5 seconds> I don't know how to feel about Min handing rejected deliveries to Jinta 🫢🫢🫢

8. "But as HR, I have to know everything" 😂😂😂 Tbf, as a BL fangirl, Pai's reaction is so valid 😂😂😂

9. Ngl, Big Boss's concerns are entirely valid. So many couples who break up tend to make their drama involve everyone else. However, I don't think that no-dating contract is effing legal 😅

10. If Achi isn't already in love with Karan, he is definitely, very much in love with him now 😭😭😭

11. THREE MILLION BAHT IN TWO WEEKS? FROM SELLING NON-PERISHABLE OFFICE SUPPLIES???? SPECIFICALLY FOUNTAIN PENS???? I take back what I said about Big Boss being valid. He is fvcking out of his mind 🤬

12. Ngl, a heartbroken Jinta looks like a kicked, abandoned puppy 😭😭😭 An oblivious Min can be so mean 😭😭😭 <after 5 seconds> Nvm, Jinta just fell harder in love again 😅😅😅

13. Achi really wants to help Karan 😭😭😭 But I guess Karan has something to prove to Achi too 😭😭😭

14. *Karan on scoring a deal with a "big client"* Me: Is the client P'Lookwa??? <after 2 seconds> Oh no. It is P'Lookwa 😭😭😭 Hope sexual harassment is not on the table this time <after 5 seconds> Nvm, her character is still slimy and creepy 🤬 Also, shame on big boss for letting P'Lookwa's character get away with it.

15. I never thought I would be aiming and raising my middle finger on P'Lookwa, but here we are 🖕 if Big Boss does not do anything about this, both Karan and Achi should resign. No job is worth this kind of fucking humiliation 🤬 <after 5 seconds> Good. Although Big Boss shouldn't have let things go that far.

16. ACHI FINALLY CONFESSED HIS POWERS TO KARAN. ALSO JINTA WILL BE CONFESSING TO MIN???

Never thought this episode would irritate me almost as much as The Sign Ep. 11 😅😅😅 The fvck. Good thing this episode has a good resolution.

#cherry magic thailand #cherry magic thailand ep 8 #karanachi #taynew #tay tawan #new thitipoom

[hyenahunt]

Saga: Rivals - 13

Writer: Akira

Season: Winter

Characters: Sora, Tsumugi, Hiyori

Proofreading: moricchiichan (JP) & hyenahunt (ENG)

Translation: kotofucius

Tsumugi: Oh no, I couldn't have given birth to him~ He’s a junior in my unit — Harukawa Sora-kun.

[Read on my blog for the best viewing experience with Oi~ssu ♪]

Location: Front Gate

Sora: HaHa~♪ HiHi~♪ HuHu~♪

HaHiHuHeHo~♪

Tsumugi: Ahaha. You're in a rather good mood today, aren't you? Seeing you looking so happy makes me happy too, Sora-kun~♪

Sora: Really? It's a mutual interaction of happiness! Or actually, it's also the magic of Switch~♪

Tsumugi: It really is ♪ Ah, is this piggyback ride putting you in good spirits? Now that I'm thinking about it, you've been rather attached to me recently, haven't you~?

Sora: You mean I can't? Nuzzling up to your hair is just so soothing, Senpai, it feels like being inside a bird nest…♪

Tsumugi: No, of course you can~ You’re such an affectionate kid.

I’m happy you’d want to cuddle up to someone like me. To this day Natsume-kun still won’t soften up to me at all.

Sora: HeHe~♪ Don't worry~ Master loves you, Senpai!

Tsumugi: I wonder about that~ In fact, I think he hates me more and more every day.

I saw him on my way to school this morning, so I said hello, but all he did was shoot me a murderous glare and insulted me just as always.

Sora: HoHo~♪ So just like Sora, Master is feeling pretty down about Senpai’s graduation, isn't he?

Tsumugi: Hmm… But it’s not like death is splitting us apart or anything.

But I still haven't decided on my career path, so my future is rather unclear… could it be that Natsume-kun's also worried?

In that case, I wish he'd be more honest about it.

It's a little troubling that he keeps taking it out on me like this — the other day, he threw salt at my head as soon as he saw me, you know?

I tried to take it positively, and asked if we were reenacting the tale of Sodom and Gomorrah —

But without missing a beat, he told me he'd rain sulfur and fire down on me too!

Sora: HaHa~? Salt is for keeping monsters away, though~ Senpai, are you a monster?

Tsumugi: Oh, no~ I’m not anything as cool as that.

Sora: Demons are cool? Aren't they scary and creepy? Well, they also give you EXP when you take 'em down~♪

Tsumugi: That’s generally how they’re viewed, I suppose.

But recently, demons aren't as disliked as they once used to be — it's easy to see that when you consider everyone in UNDEAD.

In fact, I think it seems like evil has a kind of allure of its own.

Sora: Hmm~? Well, magicians were also once considered repulsive and eerie, weren't they~?

Tsumugi: Exactly. That’s why witch hunts happened.

You may be an exception, Sora-kun, but generally, when everyone around you points at something and says it’s bad, you'll start being convinced that it’s bad, too.

This may be a tasteless example…

…But suppose someone told you that there was a cockroach in some food as a joke. Even if it wasn't true, you'd think twice before eating it.

Well, I'd probably go ahead with eating it, actually… But that’s not quite the norm.

Sora: HiHi~♪ It's precisely because humans possess wisdom that they have imagination, and magic tricks take advantage of that, right~? To quote Master, that is!

Tsumugi: Yep, that’s why magic is most effective on humans. Now, back when I was in fine…

…Whoa, whoops?

Hiyori: Tsumugi-ku~un! Well done on coming to meet with us! As a reward, I shall grant you the high honour of gazing upon my smile…☆

Sora: Wah! That's too bright!?

Tsumugi: Wah―!? What’s wrong, Sora-kun? Did you get something in your eye? Please don’t flail about~ You'll hurt yourself if you fall, you know?

Hiyori: Ahaha. What's the matter, who's this boy? Is he your precious flesh and blood, Tsumugi-kun?

Tsumugi: Oh no, I couldn't have given birth to him~ He’s a junior in my unit — Harukawa Sora-kun. For some reason, he's been sticking close with me lately.

Hiyori: Sora? Is he from Ba-barrier, then? I do believe his name was in the files I received, yes?

Tsumugi: Wow, your memory is as impressive as ever~

That’s correct. From time to time, he performs in a temporary unit called Ba-barrier.

They perform less frequently than Rain-bows, or rather… There hasn't been much going on for them since the live performance they had in early summer.

But as far as I know, they haven’t disbanded.

Sora: Yep, they brought us members together at first since we had lots of free time, thanks to our usual units being a little inactive, you see~?

But both Switch and Valkyrie have gotten busier with all our public performances now!

Tsumugi: On top of that, MaM's Mikejima-kun still regularly flies overseas… I’m sure it’s difficult for all your schedules to overlap~

Whenever you're not around, Sora-kun, Natsume-kun gets more irritable than usual…

So if you wound up focusing too much on Ba-barrier, I'd personally be in trouble.

Sora: Ehehe, does he get lonely without Sora?

But Ba-barrier still sometimes meet up to update each other on recent happenings, and teach each other things we don’t understand, so we’re all getting along well~♪

Tsumugi: Ah… I did hear recently that there’s a new rule about getting dropped from Project-Saga if you haven’t been active enough, so you must all be working in a frenzy to avoid that, aren't you?

After all, you performed an S3 in the auditorium, and other similar things.

Sora: That's right! But our role is essentially to work as backstage supporters for Rain-bows — at least, that's what Kunugi-sensei wants to do!

So it isn’t good for us to stand out too much, you see~?

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#ensemble stars #enstars #enstars translation #hyenahunttl #s: saga #hiyori tomoe #tsumugi aoba #sora harukawa