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silkylious · 4 years

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Fucking Imbecile (Bakugo Katsuki x Fem!Reader)

Pairing: Bakugo Katsuki x Fem reader Warnings: Just a whole lotta fluff, light angst and comfort Prompt: #1 “Great. Now you’ve gone and fallen in love with her/him, you fucking imbecile”

A/N: Thank you @call-me-prodigy for the request! I hope you like this!

A constant.

That’s what you’ve always been in his life. No matter the time, place or circumstances, you’ve always been there for him. He’d dubbed you a pebble on the side of the road for his feet to kick around, but much like his other childhood friend, it didn’t seem to perturb you in the slightest. Always wandering around with that dumb, carefree grin. Unlike Izuku though, you didn’t share his desire of becoming a hero. Violence just wasn’t for you, and even if there were a lot of rescue-centric heroes out there, fighting was still a huge part of the job. Besides, it wasn’t like you could be one even if you wanted to. You were quirkless after all. Your lack of interest in heroics didn’t mean you didn’t want to help people, however. Ever the true pacifist, you sought to make everyone’s day better, regardless of how big or small the effect may be, if your smile could brighten someone’s day even by a little bit then that was enough to satiate you. Which explains why throughout his childhood, despite him being a gigantic dickhead, you were a source of unconditional support and optimism in his life. A constant ray of blinding sunshine, livening his day up whether he asked for it or not.

The events that had just transpired left his brain reeling, struggling to catch up to reality. You looked like you were asking for help. Now that he wasn’t in the grips of the sludge villain, he was left to his own devices to overthink. Fucking Deku, I didn’t need help with that expired nickelodeon slime! He repeated over and over again, though it honestly felt like he was trying to reassure himself at this point. Katsuki was confident in his abilities (that’s a fucking understatement), but he couldn’t shake the feeling of actually being in the clutches of danger, no matter how many times he’d envisioned a scenario like this. People bumped into him from each direction, he didn’t feel them, eyes trained on his open palm. The pinnacle of his power couldn’t save him, yeah sure he stalled for a bit, but if All Might hadn’t showed up, both him and that shitty nerd would’ve been toast. That undeniable fact absolutely shook him. Before he could mentally crumble apart, a hand found his shoulder, stabilizing him in reality. So warm, so recognizable, it felt like home.

He turned around and was met with soft eyes, but they held no pity, no sympathy; they didn’t call him a weakling. They poured with understanding, pride and hope, as if telepathically telling him to learn from this experience, not take it to heart. You silently tugged at his sleeve, walking him towards his residence and he didn’t say no, he didn’t say anything at all. Just quietly watched your back as you lead the way, hand still lugging him along. Not once did you look back, and he decided that he wouldn’t either. He’d learn from this, and not look back; no reason to brood over what could’ve gone wrong.

When you went your separate ways (him to U.A. and you to a public high-school), he found it hard to adjust to your absence. Quirkless or not, he valued your presence in his life. He wouldn’t admit it to save his life, but he missed your encouraging smile, missed your comforting touch. He’d grown attached to you, you’d never once made him feel small, weak or pitiful, and you still managed to console him when he needed it most. Luckily for him, you lived next door.

He lost. To fucking Deku. That was certainly a first. What rubbed salt into his open wound were his other classmates, Katsuki was not accustomed to having actual competition. He was so used being first by a landslide, that his mind could barely compute not only his loss against Deku, but the sheer skill and strength some of his peers showed off. Like that Half-n-Half bastard. Fuck. Then that stupid nerd had to babble some bullshit about a borrowed quirk, was he mocking him? Did Deku seriously think he was dumb enough to believe shit like that?! He was standing in front of his home, refusing to go in, not when he still had fucking tears in his eyes.

“Katsuki?” Of fucking course, you had to show up now of all times. You seemed to have a habit of catching him at his lowest and it was pissing him off. He dried his eyes with his sleeve, he knew it was futile and his eyes were bloodshot anyway, but he refused to cry in front of you. At lest that was the plan.

“F-Fuck off!” His stammer severely dulled the insult. You ignored it, as per usual.

“What happened?” You persisted, approaching him until there was only a couple inches between you. His shaky breaths came out short, unrhythmic. You slowly lowered his forearm from his face, only to be greeted by his vermilion gems encased in angry red lines, clear indications that he was crying. Katsuki watched, waited for you to show any kind of that self-righteous pity, the kind he saw in Midoriya’s eyes, the kind that he full-heartedly loathed. But it never came, all he could see is patience and quiet succor, waiting for him to say his piece. “What happened, Katsuki?” You repeated. The addition of his given name softened him up way too much for his own comfort.

Fuck it. He blew off at the mouth, releasing all his frustrations and insecurities in one breath. Katsuki was screaming, shouting and yelling to his heart’s content. And you listened, not once did you intervene his venting session. When his voice became scratchy, his eyes watering again and not a coherent word came out of his mouth, that’s when you decided to step in. His unintelligible ramblings were cut off as you engulfed him in a tight hug.

“Listen to me, Katsuki. And I want you to listen good,” The words were whispered right into his ear, as if you were trying to push them directly through his subconscious. He stood there, stiff as a board as he took in your response, your arms holding him securely. “You’re strong and smart and hardworking, I know that better than anyone else. But you’re not flawless; nobody is, and that’s not a bad thing, its not a weakness. Tell me, don’t you want to be the strongest hero of them all? The best? The number one?” He, in a very uncharacteristic and meek fashion, gave you a single nod. “Then knowing your flaws and working on them is essential to that, don’t ya think? Losses, right now, aren’t weaknesses, Katsu. They’re steppingstones. You’re still learning, you still have so much room for improvement, and you can only improve by working on your flaws, yeah?”

Your voice was so gentle, so comforting, hands rubbing at his tense shoulders and back. He couldn’t help but wrap his muscled arms around you too, nodding his head as he planted it closer to the crook of your neck. Katsuki kept you in that position for god knows how long, breathing in your scent while letting your words sink in. He briefly contemplated the possibility of you having a quirk. A quirk that let’s you say the right things at the right time because goddamn you knew just how to lift his spirits.

“Thanks, nerd.” It was so faint that had it not been uttered into your neck, you probably wouldn’t have heard it. He tightened his hold on you for a split second before he completely let go and walked to his front door, entering and shutting the door behind him without sparing you a second glance. He stepped in feeling much more relieved, elated even, but he didn’t understand the rapid beating of his heart, nor did he want to dwell on it. It’s probably from all the yelling anyway.

On the other side, you stood with a serene smile, humming lightly with jubilation.

“You’re welcome, Katsuki.”

He’d seek you out whenever he wanted to rant about that fucking nerd or the Half-n-Half bastard, and you listened to his every word, giving your own comments whenever you felt they were needed. Somehow, despite going to different schools, the separation seemed to draw you closer together. You’d frequent his room, study with him, play video games with him, and sometimes you’d just lay there, silently cherishing each other’s company. Then he had to leave for the U.A. training camp.

“Take care, Katsu,”

“Yeah, yeah,” Crimson eyes fell on your form, he adjusted the duffel bag strap on his shoulder. Shifting his weight from one leg to the other, Katsuki contemplated his next move, awkwardly staring at your face while his mind went into overdrive. For fuck’s sake. You watched him curiously as he huffed aggressively, stomping over to you. He roughly pulled you into an embrace, if you could even call it that; it felt like he was trying to suffocate you.

“Stay safe, dumbass.” He grumbled, ending the affectionate gesture as soon as it had started.

It was supposed to be a get away resort to enhance the students’ quirks, but they got way more than they’d bargained for. You stayed up all night, gaze trained on the news channel as more and more updates filed in. They took him. They kidnapped him. Staring with tears in your eyes at the sight before you, blue flames licking at what was supposed to be a secret location. Your heart was palpitating wildly in your chest.

“Izuku!” The whole class turned around at the sound of an unfamiliar voice. You quickly shuffled past them, almost throwing yourself at Midoriya’s frame on the hospital bed. You cried into his chest, agony bleeding from your eyes as you pleaded, begged for him.

“Bring him back, please. Bring back our Kacchan, Izuku!” If his hands weren’t in casts, he would’ve clutched you impossibly closer. He was the only one who knew of your feelings for his childhood friend and seeing you like this added more fuel to the fire of determination in his eyes.

A week had passed, Katsuki was rescued and he hadn’t said a word to you since his arrival. You figured he needed time to think but god did you miss him, all you could think about is being in his arms, his presence, hearing his voice, anything that could assure you he was still here, alive and safe.

Late into the night, you couldn’t catch a wink of sleep, too preoccupied with the aftermath of everything that had happened one week ago. There was a knock at your door. Your parents were well asleep, so you were left to see who would be here at this ungodly hour. Looking through the small peephole, your eyes caught sight of spiky ash blonde hair. The door was swung open, Katsuki didn’t have time to react before you flung yourself at him and he nearly lost his balance from the impact. He’d never seen you this shaken up (you were always so calm and collected) and it fucking hurt so you like this, because of him, because he wasn’t strong enough, because his weak ass couldn’t save himself-

“I missed you so much, K-Katsuki,” You were sniffling and hiccupping all over his shirt, but he couldn’t care less about that. His attention was drawn to you, the state you were in, he didn’t even return your hug, all he could think about was how pathetic and weak he was. Immediately, you picked up on his lack of reaction, how his head was bowed in shame, how his hands limply hung at his sides. You’d seen him in this exact position countless times before and you knew what you had to do. Sat on your couch, the silence was deafening, vastly different to the air of tranquility you usually shared. Katsuki decided to speak first.

“It was my fault–”

“Katsu–”

“Let me finish.” You bit the inside of your cheek to stop yourself from interjecting his speech. But god, it was so hard to keep quiet when he was berating himself like this. He poured his heart out to you, each word so damning, so broken. Every syllable that fell from his lips cut through you; you couldn’t bear to see him like this. You could only imagine the sheer anguish lurking inside him, his idol retired to save him, even just the thought made your chest hurt. Tears painted his face, yours too. By the time he’d gone mute, you had him in your grip, rocking him gently as you tried to recollect your thoughts.

“Katsuki,” You started, voice faint and barely a whisper. “I don’t know exactly what happened there, but… if there is anyone to blame for this, it’s the villains,” His head was buried in your chest, tears still cascading down his face and into the material of your shirt. “And honestly, I don’t think anything you could have done would have changed the outcome at all. You don’t give yourself enough credit, Katsu. If anyone else was in your place, I doubt it would’ve changed anything for the better. Honestly, I feel like this was probably the best case scenario, it’s still shitty but at least you’re alive and safe. All Might’s alive, your classmates are all safe. All the damage was the villains’ fault, not yours. Please don’t beat yourself up over this, it was out of your control…” Your voice trembled as another barrage of water conquered your eyes. Your hands ran through his soft follicles, trying to soothe the hurricane that was stampeding through both of you.

That strange sensation in his gut began to arise again as you shed tears of empathy for him, the beating in his heart accelerating considerably. You remained that way, in each other’s embrace, until you both fell into slumber and your parents woke you up the next day. As Bakugo said his goodbye to you and watched you close the door with a stupidly cute bedhead, he realized something. Something that explained the annoying flutter of his heart whenever you called him that stupid nickname, the overwhelming desire to be near you at all times and why he only ever let you break through his defense, bringing down his fortified walls brick by brick.

Katsuki facepalmed.

“Great. Now you’ve gone and fallen in love with her, you fucking imbecile.”

After his move to the U.A. dorms, your rendezvous had become a lot less frequent. He found himself thinking about you way more than he’d like to admit, unbeknownst to him you were thinking about him just as much, if not more. You’d send him a text daily asking how he was, fussing over his well-being and making sure he’s okay. And the times you did meet up, things would be… off with him. With the revelations about his own feelings recognized (finally), Katsuki found himself noticing small things about you, ticks and habits most people wouldn’t bat an eye at, but he did. He found himself struggling not to blush whenever you shared a goodbye hug, or when you would lean over to look at his notebook during your study sessions, coming dangerously close to his face. You’d picked up on his change of attitude too but didn’t comment on it. It sent butterflies soaring in your chest, head high above the clouds every time that adorable pink would grace his devilishly handsome face, yet you couldn’t risk it. What you had with Katsuki was precious to you but also to him, you didn’t want to ruin one of the only true friendships he had for the sake of your own feelings.

Katsuki finally grew the balls to tell you (after an onslaught of teasing from the Baku-squad when they caught wind of his crush). He was over at your place for the weekend, you spent the whole day playing video games (ahem getting your ass kicked), watching crappy horror movies and just enjoying each other’s company. He loosened up the more time went on, reminding himself to savor every waking moment with you by his side, never again would he take you for granted.

You were on your third horror film, competing to see who would get scared first. The plot in this one wasn’t all that horrible if you were being honest, it had completely captivated you, so much so that you couldn’t see the smirk on Katsuki’s face or how his hand had sneaked around the back of the couch to reside behind your shoulders, waiting for the right moment to strike. The scene was building up to a climax, Katsuki side eyed you as you leaned forward, too engulfed in the movie to be aware of your surroundings. And then–

“AHHH!”

An all too embarrassing shriek left your throat, you’d never live that one down. Katsuki was laughing his ass off as your brain tried to register what had just happened. And when it finally clicked, you were ready to beat his ass into oblivion. Jumping into his lap without thinking about it, you began throwing punches at his chest (that honestly felt like getting tickled to him), which substantially increased his laughter until there were tears in his eyes. “You asshole! why would you do that?!” Your indignant cry only served to make him laugh harder until he sounded like a seal doing a mating call. His atypical glee was contagious and you found yourself chuckling along, hands no longer jabbing at his pecs, rather resting peacefully over them, feeling his chortles in overwhelming detail.

When the dust had settled and your chuckles died down, both of you became infinitely conscious of the position you were in. Both of your faces suddenly aflame with realization. When you went to break the close proximity between you, he surprised both of you by securing his hands on your hips, keeping you in place. The fiery red adorning his cheeks was a comical contrast to the determined scowl on his face. His knuckles were turning white as he dug his digits into your sides, steeling himself.

“(n-name), I like you… a lot,” Katsuki wished he could stare at anything but your face, yet he forced himself to watch your reaction. “I-I wanna be more than friends–”

Not another letter passed through his lips before you molded them with your own, sealing that as your response. His hands relaxed a bit, moving up to your waist and kneading the soft skin there. When you pulled a part, you’ll never forget the sight of the small grin of genuine elation on his face, not taking a second to reciprocate it.

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nothing-but-dreamy · 3 years

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BROKEN

Pairing: NYX ULRIC x GENDER NEUTRAL!READER

Words: 3.401

Warnings: angst; fluff; mention of sex; raw emotions; kinda dark (?)

A/N: This is the sequel to ‘Reckless’. But ‘Reckless’ got written with a female reader. Because I’m trying to change my writing style to suit more readers, I changed the female reader of ‘Broken’ to a neutral reader. So, basically, ‘Reckless’ was about a Glaive who worked kinda thoughtless during missions. They jumped into every dangerous situation they could find. Nyx wasn’t too fond of their behavior and so, he seeked a conversation with them. Because both held unspoken feelings for each other, the conversation turned into something intimate and heated.

‘Broken’ is the darker sequel to give a bit more background to the reader. But I wrote it so that you can read it as a standalone.

Three weeks had passed since you and Nyx had your little heated 'discussion' in the Glaives' headquarters. As promised, the same day, Nyx had kept his word and visited you to show his arguments again and again why you should be less reckless. This night was the beginning of something great...and undeniably intense. None of you couldn’t keep your hands off each other. Almost nowhere. Even if you tried to keep it secret in front of the others, you found ways to have fun with Nyx wherever you wanted.

Nyx was drawn to your wildness as if danger was your second nature. Quickly, you noticed Nyx’ animalistic side while you were drawn to the way Nyx saw you. He gave you the feeling to be wanted. He gave you closeness where you usually just got rejected.

But like always when it became good, your past was haunting you no matter how far you would run. You had run to the farthest point you could find on the map - to Insomnia - and yet, Ryan had found you.

You hoped to get distracted as you joined the Glaives. On the battlefield, the war sounds and the screams of your dying enemies would be louder than the other voices in your head. Ryan would get silenced.

Nyx was right, you were reckless. Thoughtlessly, you ran into every new fight no matter what size the enemy had because the language of your blades were the only one you could speak fluently. Violence was what you knew the best because then, Ryan disappeared.

When you were with Nyx, the voices also became silent. When you were enjoying the man's satisfying presence, everything in your head died down to the point that Nyx was everything you could think of.

But as something else started to grow inside of you, a little, small thing called 'love', Ryan was back with full force to remind you what you were and what you had done.

"You bring death to everyone around you! You bring bad luck to everyone you love! You're the reason why everyone dies! I wish you would be dead instead of them! I hope you will never be happy!"

"No, I'm not like that! No! No! No! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!", you cried out, pressing your fists against your head to fight against the pain behind your temples.

For the twentieth time, Nyx checked the time on his watch and frowned. Slowly, he paced up and down at the meeting spot, becoming more and more impatient the longer he had to wait. It was unusual. For three weeks, he was dating you and every single moment had been amazing. With you, everything was so intense, passionate and lust-filled.

Then, Nyx had tried his luck and had asked you out to have a real date with dinner, maybe a movie. He wanted to show you that he saw more in you than just a sexual partner. In his eyes, you were more than just a fling. You could be more. More like a couple. You had been cautious with your answer and now, as you didn't show up, Nyx thought that he might have been too eager. That it was maybe too early for you. Maybe you felt caged by him…

Five minutes later, Nyx decided he had waited long enough and so, he walked to your place. He wanted to know what your problem was. Why were you acting this frustrating because Nyx really thought you two had worked past it. You had grown a bond. So, why were you trying to destroy it again? Nyx already searched for the problem by himself.

Nyx walked his way up the stairs to your apartment, already kinda angry but stopped as he heard something: "Go away! Why can't you just leave me alone! I'm not what you say! It's not my fault!"

Nyx’ hand froze in front of the door as he was just about to knock. He heard the angry, frantically and muffled cries behind the door as if you were screaming at someone. Without knocking, Nyx opened the door to help you but as he stepped in, the picture in front of him let his blood run cold. There was no one else in the small room except you.

Your place was more spare than Nyx' own if that was even possible. You had a bed and an old, worn wing chair. In one corner hung a used punching bag which was still swinging, obviously you had trained until the moment you had broken down in front of it.

Nyx' eyes were glued at your frame. You were just dressed in shorts and a trainingstop. Your hands were bandaged for the punching bag. You were covered in sweat while you had been slumped down on your knees, holding your head violently between your fists which were pressing against your temples. Your eyes were squeezed shut and so, you hadn't noticed Nyx yet.

Softly, Nyx closed the door. On his way over to you, his eyes fell on a bunch of pictures. He had seen them before. They were like his own: family memories with smiling faces and proud parents and a brother. They were old and the color faded on the edges but he never asked you about them because he wanted to give you the time to do it on your own.

Nyx knelt next to you, not daring to touch you because in fear to scare you. He was even scared on his own to see you, this usual tough person in such a state. You never had been this vulnerable in front of him, or in front of someone else or … at all. Nyx leant forward, searching your closed eyes, "YN? Hey, it's me-"

By the sound of his voice, your head snapped up to meet his glance. Nyx saw your bloody eyes, your lashes were spikey and your face was frozen in an expression of pure agony. Like a blank nerv, pain, hate and loathing were displayed on your features that Nyx became speechless.

"Leave me alone, Nyx!", you hissed.

He had seen you angry before but nothing was compared to what he saw now in your eyes, "No.", Nyx said calmingly, closing up on you slowly, "I won't leave you alone like this.", he said softly. Just to see you in such a state broke his heart.

"I said you shall go!", you cried out angrily, punching against his chest to gain more distance between yourself and his caring, blue eyes that made you angry. As he didn't move, you snatched out one of your blades from a hidden spot to threaten him.

Nyx moved quickly, grabbing the blade from your shaking hand and threw it aside before you broke down in his arms, crying violently against his chest.

Nyx sat down on the ground, leaning against your bed and letting you cry. He tickled your neck and stroked over your hair and back to calm you. Nyx had no idea what had happened and he didn't dare to ask. Whatever had triggered this, it had to be something extreme you barely showed someone, hiding everything like this somewhere deep down inside of you. Caging it to prevent yourself from breaking.

Five minutes later, you slowly calmed down. You felt exhausted and empty, physically and emotionally. You noticed Nyx' arms enclosing you softly but also determined to keep you close, to give you comfort. You felt guilty that he had seen you like this but you couldn't change it now where the damage was done.

You just could explain it, "Everyone of our village died that day as the imperials came.", you said low, your voice barely a whisper and hoarse from all the crying. First you thought Nyx hadn't heard you but his grip became stronger around you and so, you continued with the urge to explain yourself while snuggling closer to his chest, "That day, I lost everything. Everyone I knew died. Except me and my brother. We got rescued by some hunters. But, you know, I ... I should have died there with all the others! I should be dead instead of being alive!", you said desperately, feeling how new tears were crawling to the surface.

"No, YN. No. That's not true. Why do you think that?", he asked concerned, trying to keep his own emotions out of his voice.

"Yes, it is true! My brother was right! I always brought bad luck to everyone around me!", you argued angrily. You clenched your fists, trying to hurt yourself with your nails digging into the palms of your hands to let yourself feel something else than grief.

Nyx was shocked. He couldn't believe what he heard, "Yo-your brother? He said all these things?", he asked in disbelief.

You looked up quickly but as you saw his eyes, you had to draw your glance away again, "Yes. My brother, Ryan. The hunters had helped us. Brought us somewhere safe but after we realized what had happened, Ryan said it was my fault that our parents died. He casted the blame on me and you know what? He's right. Our mother died because she saved me and as she got shot our dad tried the same. Both would be still alive if it weren't for me. So, before I will be the reason for more deaths, I ran away."

"H-how old were you as you ran away?", Nyx whispered. His blood was slowly fueled with anger against your brother who had said all these horrible things.

"I don’t know… I guess, I was thirteen, maybe twelve as I left the hunters. Since then, I've been alone. And I will always be alone. It's the only way for me.", you whispered, determined to stay by your habit.

Nyx leant back to look into your eyes, "You're not alone-", he tried.

"Yes, I am! And that's how it should be!", you hissed and felt bad for snapping at him.

"No. YN, look at me, please.", Nyx asked and as you raised your head, he smiled softly, stroking wet strands of your hair out of your face before he cupped it, "You're not alone. You have friends here. You... Y-you have me.", he said carefully with an insecure smile. For a split second, he saw that he got through to you. Your eyes became clear with hope before the self-loathing was back.

"No. I don't have you. You can't stay with me or otherwise you will be dead like everyone else.", you whispered before you looked away.

Nyx' heart broke all over again. The pain you felt was nothing new to him, it just seemed to be so much worse than what he felt usually. Carefully, he forced you to look at him again, "Listen, as a Glaive, nothing is certain. We both know that. Obviously, our lives aren't made for certainty. But I will stay by your side as long as I can. Trust me."

"I'm bad luck. Why would you want to have someone as broken as me, anyway?"

"Because you're the toughest person I have ever met. You have so many scars and you still keep fighting. You never back down. The fire you're carrying makes me speechless. Everyone around you comes first. I admire you so damn much for everything you stand for. Your handsomeness makes me speechless. You're so damn sexy and sensual that it is addictive.", Nyx said honestly.

"You just say that because the sex is great and you want more of that.", you whispered sadly.

"No! I mean, yeah... Of course, it is great! But I... YN, I tell you that because it's the truth. It's the truth that I see you like this. And ... it's also the truth that I'm falling for you.", Nyx whispered with a pounding heart.

"Y-yo-you do- what? No! You can't do that!", you called out, panic appearing in your eyes. You even tried to leave Nyx' side, to crawl away from him.

Nyx kept you in place and chuckled softly, "You can't forbid people to like you and you can't prohibit me to love you.", he said softly. It was a very long time since he had said these words. He wanted to comfort you, sure, but they weren’t just meaningless words out of niceness. Nyx really meant them.

And to his delight, he saw that you believed him. New tears were building in your eyes. You looked sadly at him but at the same time, your eyes filled themselves with fondness for him. A tear rolled down your cheek and Nyx caught it with his thumb, "Please, don't cry anymore.", Nyx whispered and pressed a soft kiss on your lips which tasted salty after all the tears shed.

As he leant back, you stopped him. You clawed your fingers into his shirt, pulling him back to you to kiss him softly. Just slowly, you increased the pressure of your lips, noticing that he waited for your next moves, for your pace before he adjusted to it. You felt vulnerable. You hated it that he had seen you like this. And yet, that he was there meant the world to you.

Someone was there for you. Someone who seemed to love you even when you were broken like this. You knew that Nyx also had lost so many things. He couldn't save his mother and sister and suddenly, you realized that your recklessness all the time had to be the worst for him. Nyx feared to lose you while he would be helpless to rescue you because you jumped right into danger.

Slowly, you leant backwards, landing on the cold floor with Nyx on top of you. You snaked your legs around his waist and your arms around his neck to keep him close.

Nyx felt that you needed physical contact and yet, it was something completely different than usually when he was with you. You had wanted him before but that was always demanding, aggressive and determined. Almost animalistic. And now, you were so soft, caring and slow with him.

Your kisses were delicious and filled with love that Nyx melted against you. You kissed him longingly that he forgot to breathe. Your hands roamed over his body in admiring moves, savoring him and his flaws because for you, they were non-existent.

You grabbed the rim of his plain shirt, pulling it slowly up and over his head just to touch his hot skin again in the next second. You stroked over his back. Admiring every single scar you could find softly with your fingertips. You traced along them, stroking along Nyx' spine to produce goosebumps on your way.

Nyx shuddered against your frame as he felt your caring touch moving upwards to his neck. You raked your slender fingers through his hair and combed it with them. Carefully, you played with the braids as if you never had touched them before. You stroked along the small beads and enjoyed the feeling of Nyx' extremely soft, feathery hair. Never before, you noticed their softness like in this moment.

Reluctantly, Nyx left your sweet lips but his lungs demanded oxygen. He created a small space to look into your eyes which were sparkling with admiration he had never seen before. You wanted to say something, Nyx saw it but instead, you just gnawed on your lower lip. Slowly, you stroked from his back, over his shoulders down his chest.

Under Nyx' intense glance, you moved your hands down Nyx' upper body. Along his scarred chest, down his abs and to his hips before you opened his pants. Slowly, you raised your eyes to meet his glance. Connected with his blue eyes, you started to roll your hips against him to increase the friction even more.

Nyx knew what you wanted. And there was no way he would deny your request to have him. Slowly, he crawled back, offered you his hand to stand up before he undressed his remaining clothes. You followed immediately and pushed Nyx down on your bed to crawl on top of him.

Fascinated, Nyx watched you taking your time with him. While you made your way up along his body, you kissed every inch you could find: his hips, his ribcage and his collarbones. Before you reached his lips, you bit softly into his neck which caused him to moan deeply with desire. Nyx stroked along your back and clawed into your shoulder blades as he felt your teeth digging into his skin.

With you in his arms, Nyx rolled you around, bringing you into a position to enter you teasingly slow. You moaned low with closed eyes by the pleasurable feeling caused by Nyx. You clawed your hands into your bedsheets, arching your back while Nyx captured your lips with his own for a passionate kiss. He always enjoyed every moment with you but now, this was intimate in a different way. None of you were driven by desire rather by the urgency to show your deepest emotions you held for each other.

***

As the sun rose, you sat in the wing chair to watch Nyx sleeping peacefully. He was tangled with your blanket, arms hugging one of your pillows. His braids and strands were tousled while his chest raised slowly up and down. One single tear slipped from your eyes and rolled down your cheek. You wiped it away violently. You knew what you had to do…

As Nyx awoke, he knew the bed was empty. There wasn't much space left and he didn't have you in his arms anymore how he had fallen asleep. He pushed the pillow aside. His quickened heartbeat let him awake completely as he realized what it could mean that you weren’t there.

Nyx sat up and that was the moment where he saw you sitting in your wing chair, staring at him. You were crying again but this time silently and this was far more worse and painful for Nyx to witness than the emotional outbreak the day before, "YN? Since when do you sit there?", he asked carefully, noticing that you were fully dressed with a bag to your feet.

As you heard his voice, you blinked and looked at him, "A few hours. I wanted to leave but I- I... I saw you sleeping and couldn't go...", you whispered.

Nyx hurried out of the bed, kneeling in front of you, "I'm happy you're still here.", he said softly, cupping your face with his hand, "That's what you do, right? Leaving when it gets too much?", he asked but you just nodded as an answer. Nyx searched your eyes, "How many times have you done that before?"

You looked away, shrugging your shoulders, "I don't know. After the tenth time, I stopped counting."

Nyx sighed. He had moments where he felt lost but you were it. He had Libertus, Crowe, Pelna...you had no one. And that for a far too long time.

You looked at him, "I couldn't leave you, Nyx. I should have, but I- I couldn't... I can't give you what you deserve. I can't make you happy...", you whispered.

"Trust me, I don't even think I would deserve happiness-"

"I'm serious. I- I couldn't love you. I mean I can't love you... I don't know how. I'm not able to do that.", you breathed sadly.

"You don't have to. Why can't we just be together? No naming. No label. Just we.", Nyx offered a different way.

With doubts, you looked at him, "You still want that?"

"Oh, yes. I won't give up on you so quickly. Not after I saw so much of you.", Nyx breathed meaningfully and stood up, holding out his hand as a reason for your decision to stay.

You looked at his hand. At this strong hand that had driven you crazy and that gave you comfort at the same time. Without thinking too much, you took it. You placed your hand in his and let him guide you back to the bed. You undressed a few clothes and cuddled next to Nyx' side, curling up into his arms.

With a content smile, he inhaled your scent and pressed a soft kiss on top of your crown. Both of you were broken but at this moment, neither of you were alone because you had found each other.

#nyx ulric x gender neutral reader #nyx #nyx ulric x male reader #nyx ulric x female reader #male reader #female reader #ff15 nyx ulric #final fantasy nyx ulric #kingsglaive nyx #nyx ulric x reader #nyx ulric

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barnesandco · 5 years

Text

Spies and Secrets

Bucky buys a new jacket that is... uncharacteristically bright. Sam ribs him for it, and you- you don't know what to do with yourself.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: Language. Heavy makeout session.

A/N: Inspired by Sebastian Stan’s 2016 photoshoot - more specifically that yellow jacket - for August Man Malaysia. Written for @redgillan . Hope you like it, Maisie! It was so much fun to write lmao.

“Hey, hey, hey! Look at you!” Sam exclaims, jumping to his feet. Steve and Bucky stand in the kitchen, arms laden down with shopping bags. The object of Sam's attention, however, is the mustard-yellow jacket Bucky is wearing. "What, were they all out of decent, normal outerwear at the mall?"

“He looks good, Sam.” Steve defends, putting his bags down by the door, and heads over to the fridge. Finding what he was after - a beer - he sits down at the kitchen table, and looks back at his teammates. Sam splutters indignantly, hands on his hips. Bucky looks like he's ready to high-tail it back to his room.

“Really? You, Mr. I-only-wear-plaid-shirts-and-vintage-jackets, are giving out fashion advice. No wonder he bought that monstrosity.” Sam gestures to Bucky, who has thus far remained silent, but is now struggling to rein it in. He was hesitant about buying it - not his usual color - but he thought he looked good in it. He knows Sam's joking - it's just banter, Nat calls them an old married couple - but he's so out of his depth when it comes to the new millennium, and everything that is associated with. Everything except making women swoon. That’s stayed the same since he fell off that train in Austria.

“Shut up, Sam.” He says gruffly, shuffling to grab his own beer and return to his spot in the doorway, ready to leave. Sam ruffles Bucky's hair, flings his arm around his shoulder, grinning madly.

“I'm only messing with you, Bumblebee. Lookin' like a real lady-killer in that thing. Bet the chicks dig it. Matches their fur and all.” He laughs.

“Ignore him, Buck. You look great, trust me.” Steve says earnestly, beer bottle resting on his thigh.

“Sure, sure, trust the centenarian when it comes to 21st century fashion.” Sam waves his hand dismissively, biting into an apple from the fruit bowl on the kitchen island. Bucky picks his bags back up, and heads for the elevator.

“Whatever, Wilson.” He throws over his shoulder.

-----

“Is Sergeant Barnes going to be here?” You ask, eyes flitting around to see if he’s here yet.

“He said he was coming. Why? You can barely speak when he's around. And now you're eager to see him?” Nat says, leaning her elbows against the standing table they're at. She looks at you intently, fiddling with the umbrella from her cocktail.

“Not eager, Nat. Just curious.” You answer, turning away from her sharp gaze to survey the room. She does the same.

“Speak of the devil.” Nat says, jerking her head towards the entrance, where Bucky has just arrived.

“Dear Lord.” You whisper under your breath, grateful for the hubbub of the crowd. It disguises the words, but not the sound and Nat turns to you.

“Did you say something?” She wonders.

“No, I- nothing, nothing.” You excuse, coughing as the man in question approaches. He looks good. So good that it takes all of your willpower not to physically drop your jaw. All black - his jeans, his t-shirt, his shoes - with the exception of a delicious mustard yellow jacket. Out of character, possibly. Hot as hell, definitely.

“Hello, Barnes. New jacket?” Nat greets cheerfully, taking a sip from her drink. Bucky swallows, Adam's apple bobbing, and puts his hands in his pockets, drawing attention to those muscular thighs that have fueled your thirstiest dreams for weeks now. He nods, and a strand of hair falls in front of his eyes. You resist the urge to tuck it behind his ear.

“Yeah. Went shopping a few days ago. How are you lovely ladies doing?” He asks, running his hands through those chestnut brown locks you want to use to tug him down till your mouths meet. You touch your lips subconsciously. Is your mouth watering?

“I'm good. I think our resident IT genius could use some help, though.” Nat says delicately, glancing at you from her peripherals. You cough again.

“No! Help with what? I'm fine. Totally fine.” You say, hands flailing. Broken-record repetition must worry them further instead of alleviate their concerns. Behind Nat’s cocktail glass, you can see a thinly veiled smile. "It's good to see you, Sergeant Barnes."

“Bucky, please, doll.” He smiles at you, and your heart skips a beat. Another one. Butterflies turn to elephants in your stomach, and you shift your weight.

“Right. Uh, you- um, you don't normally come to these things.” It’s a statement, but you trail off at the end, leaving room for a question he could answer. You rest your chin on your fist, trying desperately to look casual.

“Didn't have anything better to do tonight. Why, you wishing I stayed home?” He jokes.

“No, no! I mean yes. I mean, I'm-”

“It's okay, I get it.” Bucky reassures you. He looks around, and seems to spot somewhere else he needs to be. “It was nice talkin' to you, I'll see you 'round.” Saying this, he pecks your and Nat’s cheeks, leaving you blinking and dazed.

“Bye, Barnes.” Nat is unfazed. Your shoulders drop automatically, releasing the tension - and the breath - you weren’t aware you were carrying.

“What the hell was that?”

“What was what?” You say innocently, praying she drops the subject. You’re a terrible liar, and Nat’s an excellent spy. The two factors combine to make for the fact that it is damn near impossible to hide something from Natasha Romanoff if she doesn’t want you to. You’re proud that you’ve managed to for as long as you have.

“You, all stutter-y and flustered. Do you have a crush?” She says conspiratorially. That glint in her eye is back, and that’s bad news for any and all of your secrets regarding Bucky Barnes.

“You're crazy, Nat. Bat-shit insane.” You dismiss, finishing off your drink. She doesn’t let up.

“You have all the symptoms, you know.”

“No, I don't know. All I know is that you're crazy, and I need another drink.” You push away from the table and head for the bar, hoping you don’t run into Bucky again. Heart attack sounds preferable to dealing with him in that outfit.

Two hours later, and you’re sitting with a group of Avengers who have just started a round of poker. The company party is in full swing, S.H.I.E.L.D. employees taking full advantage of the bar, both for alcohol and karaoke. Thank goodness that the latter is in a faraway corner of the room, because while most of these people know more ways to kill a man than there are grains of sand on a beach, none of them can stay on key to save their lives.

“Where did Barnes run off to?” He asks. Maria Hill snorts.

“Why, you miss your boyfriend?”

“Ha. Ha. Ha.” Sam responds mockingly. He has an excellent hand of cards, though, so the joke is on Maria really.

“Said he needed a break.” Steve pipes up, preparing to lose, good and righteous as he is. Can’t lie to save his life. Sam is gleeful, unaware that Nat has the best hand out of the lot of them. You’re not playing. S.H.I.E.L.D. pays well, even to non-superheroes, but you’ve never been much of a gambler. And it’s far more entertaining observing everyone, occasionally whispering suggestions to Nat - not that she needs them - hands on her legs draped over your lap. But your attention has been diverted to a certain ex-assassin, who plays your heartstrings like a guitar. You wait five minutes - five excruciating, torturous minutes - before yawning and pushing Nat’s legs off you.

“I- uh, I think I should head back. I'll see you guys on Monday.” You say, waving feebly to the group, and leave the room to echoes of goodnight and requests to drive safely. Little do they know you’re not leaving yet. You consider the floorplan, and try to figure out where he might be. Eventually, you recall Bucky’s preference for the stairwell designed as an exit in case of emergencies. He mentioned briefly how it was the quietest place in the Compound. Peaceful. Serene. Not to mention the open top means he can smoke.

“Hey, Sarge.” You smile shyly as you lean against the door, hands behind your back. As expected, he’s sitting on the stairs, jacket falling open to reveal a shirt stretched taut over those pectorals you long to touch. You haven’t had an opportunity to rendezvous in weeks, between his missions and your new research project. It’s not like you’ve gone all the way physically even when you do have the opportunity to see each other like this, but the way he’s looking tonight makes you want to change that.

“Was wonderin' when you'd show up.” He says around the cigarette between his lips. The serum stops it from affecting him, so he feels comfortable maintaining this particular habit. Gives him something to do with his hands. Avoids it around you, though. Tonight is no exception. Removing it from his mouth, he exhales one last time, and stomps out the half-burnt blunt under his leather boot. Passive smoking isn’t fun.

“How did you know I'd find you?” You ask, standing between his bent legs, carding your fingers through his hair. He nuzzles your stomach, nips at your dress.

“I'm magnetic, baby.” He smiles up at you, then stops when he sees your facial expression. You’re torn. “Why're you lookin' at me like that?” He asks, holding your hands, rubbing your knuckles gently with his thumb.

“Like- like what?”

“Like you don't know whether to eat me alive or run for the hills.” Bucky is apprehensive now, worried he’s done something wrong.

Your gaze moves from his concerned eyes, to that damn jacket, and back up to his lips. Something shifts inside you, and you tug him to stand upright, fists clutching the lapels of his jacket. You pull him down to meet your lips.

“Shut the fuck up, Barnes.” You murmur, mouths grazing against one another before they press together fully. He gasps at the pressure and passion behind your movement, and you take the liberty to engage his tongue in a dance with yours. His arms wrap around your waist, bending you backwards a little, but you’re too occupied by the taste of chocolate and whiskey on his breath. Too surrounded by everything Bucky. The feel of his hair between your fingers, the scent of his cologne enveloping you like his embrace. Panting, you pull away, moving to his neck.

“Hey, woah, what's gotten into you?” Bucky’s gasping for air, hands moving up and down your sides, like he doesn’t know what to do with them. He settles for resting them over your ass, and nips at your earlobe.

“You complaining?” You ask, hands on his chest. He shakes his head, and that’s all the confirmation you need as you resume your task, sucking a hickey onto his collarbone, fingers curling in the loops of his belt. He tries to continue speaking, muttering in your ear.

“Hell no. But you're always so shy, and - oh, jeez, sugar.” His sentence falls apart as you rake your nails gently down his abs. You stop at the exclamation, also intrigued by the new pet name.

“This stupid fucking jacket.” You say, pecking his lips chastely. You lean your forehead on his shoulder, unable to look him in the eyes after your outburst. Everything is hot. The air, filled with palpable electricity between your bodies. Your body itself, on fire from head to toe, concentrated on a spot between your legs. Legs that are shaking as you strive to stay upright.

“You don't like it?” He asks, holding you to him. All shyness or shame dissipates into thin air, as your head snaps up to meet his insecure expression incredulously.

“Are you shitting me? It's the hottest thing I've seen all week.” You tell him, pushing up on your toes to kiss him again. And again. And again.

“I think I can top that.” Bucky says between kisses, cradling your face in his hands, yours clutching his sides.

“I'm sure you can.” You answer, smiling wolfishly at the double entendre.

“You know what, I have a better idea.” He pauses, waiting for your signal. You give it.

“Yeah?”

“Why don't we go up to my room, and you try on my jacket. Just my jacket.”

Taglist: @buckyreaderrecs @corneliabarnes @mermaidxatxheart

#bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky fanfic #bucky x you #sebastian stan #ayesha writes

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kweebtrash · 5 years

Text

Messy (M)

Pairing(s): OC X Johnny (features other members)

Genre: College AU, Fuckboy AU

Summary: Fuckboys are basically good for one thing. You hit it and quit it- except when his voice draws you in, his body keeps you there, and dumb ass feelings linger making things particularly messy.

Warnings: drugs, alcohol

Word Count: around 16k

A/N: ‘they’ and ‘she’ are used interchangeably on purpose.

Messy Masterlist Buy me a Ko-Fi Other Stories

Three months didn’t seem like a long time, especially with how fast summers usually flew by, but it felt like ages since my last hook up. Most of the guys in my “little black book” were away for the summer while I remained stuck in my stupid college town, holed up in my tiny apartment, only going out to suffer at my mediocre job. Meanwhile, my roommate had Tinder hookups out the ass and was gone almost every other night. I guess I couldn’t complain too much. I had always been pickier than them and maybe, just maybe, I had gotten used to my steady rotation of boy toys. Sooner or later I would have to break the cycle especially since there wasn’t any guarantee that I would see them this semester. Half of them still lived in the dorms because of the exchange student program which sometimes but a hamper on our hookups. I would probably have to get a new bunch to play around with and maybe once in awhile I could hit up an old fling or two when i was really bored. But right now I was suffering and unfortunately craving what I hadn’t had in months. A vibrator or my hand could only do so much. With my upcoming class schedule I felt like i wasn’t even going to have time for hookups no matter how badly I wanted them.

it was the first weekend of the new semester and already I was having sad and pathetic thoughts about my sex life. Thankfully, they were interrupted by my evening alarm going off. Since last semester, I had gotten into the habit of listening to student radio every Friday at midnight. Normally I would never take interest in radio as it was boring, uninteresting, and doused with political commentary but one show had caught my attention. It was pretty stereotypical; a steady rotation of songs, promoting local music shows, really annoying and irritatingly stupid comments and banter. Nothing too special- except for their voices. It was why I wasted many a nights in my room thrusting whatever instrument of pleasure inside me while I thought how good that voice would sound in my ear while the owner was fucking me from behind. I don’t know why I was so wrapped up in the way it sounded. I just knew the deep and husky tone was the most sensual thing I had ever heard.

I clicked on the radio app and gave it some time, letting the hosts mull over their introductions (the most annoying part) and settle into their planned topics. In between songs, i closed my eyes waiting for his voice to return before slowly creeping my hand into my pajama shorts. His laugh would send tingles throughout my body and I could always tell when he got closer to the microphone. I could hear his shallow breaths, soft clicks of his tongue, and that small hissing sound he made as he sucked air between his teeth when he was thinking about something. There was usually a little ‘hmm’ afterwards and i basically realized I had spent way to much fucking time thinking about it and way too much time jacking off to a disembodied voice that possibly could have belonged to someone ugly and no where near my type. Not that I had planned to meet him anyway but it would have been nice to put a hot face to the even hotter voice to fuel my wet dreams. The hour seemed to fly by and just at the tail end of their outro i came hard, his smooth chuckle fueling the quick circles I made to my clit while my other hand thrusted inside me. My back fell against the mattress, coming down from the small arch i made as I regained my breath. I sighed deeply, realizing i had to get up eventually to wash my hands. I exited out of the radio app and slowly peeled myself from the bed, tossing on my shorts to shuffle out to the bathroom.

My roommate, Quinn, was already sitting on the sofa in the living room, bowl of cereal in hand. “Did you jerk off to the radio show again?”

I threw my head back and sighed, cursing the day that I told them about my secret. Though we shared the same thrill of pleasuring ourselves to the pair of voices, I still felt a little embarrassed about it. “Yes Quinn. I did. Thank you very much for asking.”

“I mean, same. Got 3 out before the half hour mark.” They slurped the milk from the bowl and crunched away at the cereal, absentmindedly watching food shows on our modest sized tv.

“Jesus Christ.” I shook my head at their physical capacity, slightly jealous, but i guess i was more about quality over quantity. “We really gotta stop doing this. It’s kinda sad.” I half joked as i kicked the door to the bathroom partway shut and sat on the toilet.

“Not really. Besides I’m prepping for this semester.”

“Prepping for what? To sleep with everyone on campus?” I laughed.

“Precisely.” They responded in between another round of crunches. “Oh, by the way, Lucas just texted me about a party tomorrow. Well tonight. Want to go?”

“Who’s party is it?” I finished and washed my hands, shaking off the excess water as i headed over to the couch. I plopped down beside them.

“I don’t know. He just said it was some people he met over the welcoming weekend activity thingy. I guess they work for the radio station or something. Anyway, can we go? I wanna drink!” Quinn said.

“You mean, you want me to be D.D. while you and Lucas get hammered and I’m stuck dragging you two home again? No thank you.”

“Aww, c’mon! It’s not always like that! We let you have fun! Pllleeeaassseeeee! What if there’s hot guys there? Oh what if those radio guys are the ones Lucas met!” They gasped and stood up suddenly. “What if we could fuck the hot radio guys?!”

“Oh my god. How about we don’t and say we did? Besides, what if they're gross? I don’t have time for that significant of a let down.”

“Don’t be so mean. People with voices that hot are bound to be good looking.”

“Call me a shallow bitch because I hope to god so but knowing Lucas, they're probably some dumb frat fuckboys and I SEVERELY don’t have time for that. Regular fuckboys are fine, but fraternity ones are the devil.” I sighed and set my feet on the coffee table.

“Well you won’t know until you find out! Please? Please? Please? Please? Pleeeaasseeee?” They whined. “If all else fails you can just hook up with Lucas again!”

I groaned and rolled my eyes far back into my skull. “Fine! Fine. I will take you and Lucas to this party. But if ya’ll get drunk I am leaving you there. Point blank.”

“Ok. Ok. I promise I will try to not get black out drunk this time. I’ll behave.”

I scoffed, knowing damn well that promise wouldn’t be kept and I would still be dragging their ass home at three am with Lucas in my backseat. Suddenly I heard my phone ping from in my room, signaling that I had received a text message. I hauled myself up from the couch with a groan and grabbed it from atop my bed. Well, speak of the devil.

Dumbass Baby Lucas: wyd?

I woke up sometime in the late afternoon with Lucas’ arm strewn across my face and him snoring into one of my pillows. I pushed his arm off me and felt around the floor for my phone, groaning as I felt the soreness of my thighs which was partly from the exertion and partly because i had to be squished to the edge of my small bed to accommodate Lucas’ giant frame. I managed to find my phone and turn the screen on, wincing at the bright light that illuminated my face. I sighed softly, realizing I had to get up at some point, take a shower, eat, and be at least semi productive. Otherwise I would stay home and just fuck Lucas some more and my body needed a few hours to recover before the party. Suddenly I felt his arm wrapped around my waist pulling me close to his warm broad chest. He was always such a cuddler.

“It’s 4 in the afternoon.” I mumbled.

“Yeah, so?” He replied, partly muffled as his lips were buried in the crook of neck and shoulders. “Party’s not until later, we have all day.”

“i would like to get up and eat something at some point in time. And shower. Which you should too. You smell funky.”

“Can we shower together?” I could feel the smirk imprinting my skin.

“You know damn well we cant. As soon as we get in there you won’t keep your hands to yourself and I wont actually get clean.”

“You know i hate keeping my hands to myself. Besides I missed you. You've been stuck here and I couldn't fuck you or Quinn all summer!”

“Boohoo, you big baby. You'll be fine without one shower fuck.” I sat up and rubbed the sleep from my eyes, yawning deeply. I shone my phones flashlight on the floor so I could guide my way to my room’s lightswitch when something caught my eye. “Lucas.” I growled.

He let out a childish groan. “Whaaaattt?”

“Didnt i tell you to throw the condoms IN the trashcan?”

“I did!”

“No, you didn’t. You threw them on the floor and now they’re all over my carpet!” I gave his bicep a hard whack. “Get up and clean it!”

He held his arm wincing at the sharp sting. “Ok! Ok! I’m going!”

I turned on the light and grabbed my robe, pulling it on and shuffling out to the kitchen. Quinn was attempting to make breakfast, the smell of burning bread and melting cheese in the air. They took one look at me and shook their head. “Why are you so grumpy? Your dry spell is over no?”

“Lucas didn’t throw any of the condoms in the trashcan that’s literally right beside the bed and they're all over the floor now.”

“Eww, like the used ones?”

“Yes. Cum and all. Go handle your dumbass best friend before I strangle him.”

“Ok, I’m going. Just watch my grilled cheese.” Quinn sighed as they put the spatula down and trudged over to my room. I looked over the grilled cheese, nudging it with the spatula and checking the underside. Way overdone. I sighed and grabbed a plate from the cabinet, sliding the sandwich onto it before retreating to our fridge. It was the end of the month which meant no food as always. The last of the cheese gone. I looked over at the two ends of bread left in the bag on the counter. Last of the bread gone. My stomach growled loudly and i slammed the fridge shut. I didn’t have money but if I begged hard enough I could convince Quinn to let me use their credit card to buy pizza.

I went back to my room, almost kicking the door open as I heard Lucas’ pouty puppy whine which was probably the result of not getting enough cuddles this morning. He was always so needy when he was sleepy.

“How much money you got?” i asked.

Lucas had gathered the condoms in his hand, finally tossing them in the trash before wiping his hand on his thigh. “Uh...i mean like i got my refund check?”

��No I meant Quinn. How much money do you have on your credit card. I’m hungry, there’s no food, and I need pizza and another 6-pack. I’m running low since Lucas’ drank most of them last night.”

“I have enough. Don’t worry.” They replied.

“I’ll give you money for them i swear!” Lucas interjected. “Or maybe more head? For like a week straight?”

“Head doesn't get me tipsy Lucas. But you can still do that if you want.” I smirked before turning to Quinn. “Can you order it please? I want to shower first.”

“Yeah, yeah...i burnt my dang sandwich anyway.”

“Sweet.” I grabbed my towel from the hook behind my door and shuffled over to the bathroom, feeling the looming presence behind me. “Lucas.” I said sternly.

“I have to pee! Cant I pee?!”

I glared back at him. “Fine. But get out once you're done.” i tossed off my robe and stepped into the shower, yanking the curtain harshly so i could block his view of me. I was ready to have the cool water on my skin to wipe away all the sticky sweat from my body. It was already too hot today.

“Where's the toothbrush i keep here?” he asked after flushing.

“In the medicine cabinet” i grumbled. “Where it's always at.”

I set myself right under the spray of water letting it flow over my hair. My purple dye was looking more like a grayish lavender, making me frown. I was going to look like a hot mess at the first party of the year. Wonderful. Suddenly, Lucas’ hand was in the shower, holding my toothbrush and toothpaste in his fist. He scared the shit out of me but i took them anyway, grateful to get morning breath and the taste of his dick out my mouth.

“When does this stupid party start?” I asked between scrubbing my teeth.

“Whenever we wanna go.” He pulled back the curtain and stepped into the shower making me groan.

“What did i just say?”

He kissed my cheek before picking me up and moving me to the other end of the tub. “Whatever. You love me.” He stuck himself under the shower head while i leaned against the tiled wall in the cold spot.

“Hurry up and get out so i can finish.” I nudged him so he would move out of the trajectory of my toothpaste clouded spit.

“I will.” he said, stepping out of the way. “Quinn and I have got some catching up to do anyway.” He winked at me before leaning over to get the bar of soap in the shower caddy beside me. “You could join us if you want.”

“Not today. Too tired for that.”

“Boo, you're no fun.” He gave me a quick kiss but hovered a little longer by my lips.

“I think the ‘Oh fuck, Eri! SHIT! YES!YES!OH GOD FUCK YES!’ said otherwise, no? Loud ass.” I gave him a slower kiss this time, cupping his chin in my hand while his instantly went to my ass, grabbing it harshly and pulling me closer.

“Are you sure we cant have a little fun in the shower?” he whispered. He placed soft kisses all over my neck and chest making his way lower until he was onto his knees. I saw his brown puppy dog eyes look up at me and he knew i couldn't resist.

“Fine. But just a little bit, ok?” I held his head close as he dove between my thighs, sighing softly as he did what he knew how to do best.

Lucas practically ran to the back of the apartment building following the sound of obnoxiously loud music. There were sliding doors that were wide open letting people flow in and out of the first floor apartment to the community pool close by. Wafts of smoke circled the party goers as they chugged bottles of beer, laughing and dancing as they went. “Hurry up!” Lucas called out to Quinn and I. Quinn was a bit faster and more enthusiastic while I took my time, shifting around someone who was already too drunk to function. It was only 10:30 too.

I finally stepped into the apartment, instantly annoyed by the smell of cheap weed and the remixed versions of some top 40 hits blaring from a macbook and speaker hookup. Before i could even make a complaint Lucas was shoving a bottle of apple ale into my hand while Quinn scoped out the party for their next target. “I'm gonna go find the guys I met. I'll be right back!” Lucas screamed over the music. I nodded and waved him off, my eyes honing in at the free bar stool by the kitchen counter. Quinn had followed Lucas leaving me on my own as usual.

I sat down on the bar stool and sipped my ale slowly, having to pace myself in order to be able to drive everyone home. I rested my chin on my hand as i scrolled through my instagram, already yawning and wanting to go back to bed. Even though i slept for about 12 hours i had still spent the night tossing and turning and getting woken up to wandering fingers between my thighs. I took another sip and double tapped my screen, liking some random makeup pic. I barely even noticed the person slide beside me until a plastic shot glass was waved in my face. I moved my head back, surprised at the intrusion before I saw who was offering it. Fuuuuuccckk.

“Well if it isn't my favorite kitten. I didn't know you'd be here.”

“Hi, Ten.” I groaned. He nudged the shot glass towards me again and I took it, knowing i would need it for this conversation.

“Almost didn't recognize you without your collar on.”

“You took the leather one back home, remember?” I rolled my eyes and tossed the shot back, wincing at the burn. “I got stuck with the pink one with the giant bell. Which is not subtle at all by the way.”

“Who said anything about wanting to be subtle?” he took a sip from his solo cup and tapped his fingers on the plastic. “You're my kitten after all.”

“And you’re my puppy whenever you want to not be a brat.” I stole his cup and tossed back a heavy gulp. “What the fuck are you even drinking?” I asked, feeling the sweet and sour taste on my tongue.

“Jungle juice. Whatever favor the purple one is. Anyway...so what's your semester look like?”

“Want to see when I can pencil you in to fuck?” I stated flatly knowing that he wasn't one to beat around the bush.

“Yep.”

“You still rooming with Yuta?”

“What about Yuta?” An arm was tossed around my shoulder and i was pulled into Yuta's chest without warning.

“Is everyone i've ever fucked here??” i almost screamed. Yuta and Ten both looked around.

“Well, there's me, Ten, Taeyong, Lucas and uh….Jungwoo.”

My eyes went wide. “You're shitting me. Please tell me Jungwoo is not actually here.”

“Oh you better believe it.” Ten smirked. “You're number one heartbreaker, honey. Congrats on still being the source of his vendetta for almost the third year in a row.”

“More drinks please. I can't do this right now.” I rubbed my temples while Yuta just laughed at me. Ten retreated to the kitchen, wiggling his smaller frame through some people and filling up a cup with another flavor of jungle juice.

“Aww, Eri. Don't pout. He's just going to hate you for all eternity that's all.” Yuta dug his hand into the bowl of chips in front of me, shoveling them into his mouth. “So like…” He paused to chew and swallow. “When can i tie you up again?” He didn't even look me in the eye when he asked, just took another sip of his beer.

“Gee, i dont know. I had a dry spell for the entire summer and now suddenly everyone I've ever fucked is at this party and i have to get a planner for my dick appointments.” I kinda laughed, trying my best to loosen up. I especially couldn't resist Yuta's smile that made me feel as if the sun radiated from him.

“You complaining about how much you get laid now? When has that ever been a problem for you?” He leaned in closer, his lips dangerously close to mine. I pulled away before he could sneak the kiss that he wanted.

“i'm not complaining, i guess I'm just a busy person after all. Still got it.” I smirked as Yuta nudged me.

“We fuck you because of your devil vagina magic and because you do just about everything.”

“Ok, first of all, it's not devil vagina magic. Second of all, am i the one who had a fucking machine in his dorm room last year? No.”

“Yeah but you're one it got used on.” Ten interrupted. He set my cup in front of me while he and Yuta put me between them like some sort of kink sandwich.

“Yes, thank you for your input, Ten.” I could feel my cheeks flushing as I remembered that wild session that lasted over six hours.

“Dont you mean ‘sir’?” Yuta chimed in.

I set my head on the counter top and groaned. “Why do ya'll always have to torture me??”

“But baby, i thought you loved getting tortured! I mean that's why you end up up tied and gagged at our place right?”

I whacked Ten upside the head. “AGAIN THANK YOU FOR YOUR INPUT TEN. I don't need to be reminded about what we do.”

“Or maybe you do?” Yuta smirked. “Hows next friday sound?”

“Hmm, maybe not Friday. I think I want her on Thursday. What if you take her on Saturday?”

“I could do Saturday.”

“I'm so glad you both are taking what I want into consideration.” I said sarcastically. “Anyway, Thursday and Saturday is fine. Bring your best shit. We’ve got to start the year off right.” I slid off the bar stool, taking my drink with me and leaving both my doms behind. Playing hard to get and being a brat was my favorite past time with them. I didn’t even take a look back as I exited the apartment, though the temptation was definitely there.

Outside wasn’t much better. It was still hot as hell for the beginning of September and with so many people packed into a small space it made everything hotter. I could feel the sweat start to bead on my forehead. I fanned at my face wishing i had some ice in my solo cup. Across from the pool, I could see my one night stand Taeyong eyeing me though I tried my best to ignore his hungry stare. I also tried not to think about how he pressed me against the door of the empty student affairs office and fucked me so hard it had started to rattle. It wasn't bad at all. In fact it was incredibly hot but we just never talked about it after and I didn't crave him as much. It was a simple fling but maybe he didn't think of it that way. I had been mostly occupied with Ten, Yuta and Lucas for the rest of last semester anyway. Oh and that whole actually going to college thing.

I sunk back against the rough brick of the building, trying to ignore Taeyong and instead scanned the area to see if i could spot Lucas or Quinn. No luck with that.

“Did you come here by yourself?” I heard a quiet voice say beside me.

I looked over at the guy scrunched against the wall, who looked like he wanted to be anywhere but here. He was gorgeous to say the very least. His jawline was from the gods, his eyes were the most perfect almond shape, and his flaming red hair suited his golden skin so well. As soon as i saw his lips pressed against the rim of his cup i knew i wanted to kiss him. “H-huh?” was all i could really manage to say and i hoped to all hell he didn't notice me staring.

“Oh, sorry.” He spoke a little louder. “Did you come here by yourself? You looked like you were trying to get away from the party.”

“No, i'm not by myself but my friends ditched me. I can't find them. I also ran into some...uh...people i knew but i needed a break from socializing.”

“I'm the same, but...were kinda socializing now.” He smiled at me and my heart skipped a beat for a moment. He was definitely going to be my next mistake. I took a long slow sip of my drink before it finally clicked in my head that I should actually introduce myself.

“I'm um-” Shit, what was my name? “Eril- Eri. Just Eri.”

“I'm Taeil. I haven't seen you around before. You go to our college, right?”

“Yep, suffering and in debt like everyone else. Im in journalism so maybe it's because im stuck at the way back of campus with all the writing buildings that we haven’t seen each other before. It's basically a dungeon. I'm trapped.” I let out a bit of nervous laughter which he reciprocated. I figured he was the shy type and I had normally stayed away from those. Too many reminders that I was a shitty heartbreaker. But he was cute and I liked his smile. That was what usually got me in trouble anyway. Taeil was a breath away from responding when the sound of Lucas’ booming voice interrupted us.

“ERI!”

“There you are, you ass.” I was at least relieved that he had found me. “You guys left me all by myself like always. Where the hell is Quinn?” I turned back momentarily to Taeil. “Sorry, i'm babysitting him. He's like a lost puppy.”

Taeil replied with a strained smiled and tipped his cup all the way back. Before i could even say anything else Lucas was dragging me away, his big hand around my arm preventing me from even trying to escape. I looked back at Taeil longingly which he returned with a confused expression. I mouthed another apology to him, hoping that i could maybe resume our conversation later (and get his number). Lucas pushed me into a ring of people, two of which i'd never met before. They were all passing around a blunt, the air surrounding them so thick with smoke that it was almost burning my eyes. I coughed and looked up at Lucas. “Why'd you bring me here?”

He put his arm around me and lowered himself to my ear. “That's Johnny and Jaehyun. The hosts of that radio show you love so much.” He said the tail end of that sentence with such a teasing tone that i just knew Quinn had told him about what we did when we listened to their voices. But now that voice was in front of me and my worst nightmare had turned into the best wet dream. I thought Taeil had made my heart stop when I saw him but I was fucking deceased when I looked at Johnny. He was tall with shoulders like a goddamn linebacker. His biceps looked absolutely perfect to grab onto while he plowed into me. And though i wasn't much of a fan of smoking the way he exhaled from his full lips gave me goosebumps.

“Well, aren’t you going to talk to him?” Lucas smirked.

“And say what? Let me suck your dick?”

“I mean, it's what you want, isn’t it?”

“Shut up.” i said bitterly as I shifted my weight and stared into my mostly empty cup, trying my best not to drool over Johnny.

“Hey, i'm a good friend and I'm doing you a solid. You need to have some more fun. I mean with someone besides me. Though we can still do that later tonight, if you want.” He followed up his half assed flirtatious statement with a wink.

“For your information, Ten and Yuta are already lined up for next week. But i’m sure you'll come knocking on my door too.”

“Always. You still owe me and Quinn a threesome.”

“We'll see.” I shrugged and finally turned my eyes up. Johnny had been looking at me- or rather looking at my figure-his eyes mostly resting on my thighs. I adjusted the band of my thigh highs self consciously, wondering if he was thinking about my legs wrapped around him like i was. My teeth were starting to dig into my bottom lip as i tried to not focus on those thoughts. Our eyes met again and instead of saying anything he just offered the blunt to me, which i denied. He shrugged, and instead passed it over to Jaehyun who was more than happy to take another hit. Quinn was beside Jaehyun, seeming to already be plotting how to get Johnny's partner in crime into bed. I knew they would convince him soon enough and i'd have to find a way to get them out of his bed in time for us to leave. Lucas had resumed his nature as a social butterfly, ignoring me to settle into another conversation. Everyone had seemed to be paired off now except Johnny and I. He took a sip from the beer bottle in his hand, a quick flash of disappointment on his face as he realized it was empty.

“Fuck.” i saw him mouth. He looked over at me, leaning in close with his hand resting on my lower back. “Want another drink?” He said into my ear.

“N-no um...i'm good. Gotta drive back so...i'm trying to pace myself.”

“That fucking sucks. This is the first party of the year. You should be blackout drunk.”

“Yeah, i’m not a freshman anymore, so that's so not happening.” I chuckled.

“Come get another beer with me then?” he asked which i agreed to a little too eagerly.

He lead the way, wrapping his hand around mine so we wouldn't get separated from the constantly moving crowd. My hand seemed to disappear within his fingers which made me want to melt into a puddle. Big hands were an absolute weakness of mine. We flowed into the kitchen that was even more crowded now as someone had brought in a few more cases of beer and the last of the jungle juice was escaping the pitcher into used cups. Johnny reached into the fridge and got another bottle, pulling his keys out from the pocket of his basketball shorts and flicking the top off with the bottle opener keychain. We moved towards the back of the kitchen to have some room away from the crowd. He didn't say anything, just sipped his drink slowly as i watched his adam's apple bob with each swallow. A partygoer asked us to move so they could reach the trash can behind Johnny. When he complied I was suddenly between his 6 foot tall frame and the wall. His hand rested way above my head as he nodded towards the partygoer with a tight lipped smile. My fingers dug into my own cup, crushing the plastic ever so slightly as i looked up at him. I was rarely nervous to be around a guy no matter how much their smiles, sultry voices, or tall bodies affected me. I had to remind myself that men were toys to me, a way to feign confidence and still get what I wanted. No strings attached with the joy of playing hard to get and emotionally unavailable.

But Johnny was making me feel different and I hated it. I wanted to crush it like an empty beer can and toss it in the trash and never think about it again. Except now he was looking down at me and i couldn't help but notice how the fluorescent lighting of the kitchen caught his brown eyes and turned them into the color of warm honey. If i was a puddle before when he held my hand i was a river now creeping closer to being an ocean and losing a grip on myself.

“What's your name?” He spoke at last.

“Eri...just Eri. You're from the uh….radio show? Lucas told me about you. Well that you guys met…”

He shrugged. “Yeah, he's cool or whatever. He reminds me of how I used to be when I first started college. You friends with him or something?”

“To say the very least.” I laughed nervously and tucked a stray hair behind my ear. Johnny tipped his bottle over, spilling some of his beer into my empty cup.

“So you fuck him? He your boyfriend?”

“God no. I mean i do fuck him but he's not my boyfriend.” I took a sip of the beer, instantly regretting it. The disgusting bitterness reminded me of regurgitated piss in a bottle but my mind was making me keep up my aloof appearance and i forced myself to drink more.

“Cool…Thought i'd ask just in case.”

“Just in case?” I swallowed thickly, knowing exactly what he was insinuating.

“Mhm...just in case.” He lowered his head, reaching down to my level, and pressed our lips together. No other words exchanged, just the feeling of the soft skin on skin, melding together in a way that wasn't sloppy or rough but rather a slow and sensual torture. I wanted to push him away; i even pressed my hands against his chest but my body failed to do it. He stepped a bit closer, his bottle free hand coming to cup my chin as his tongue pushed past my lips. I resisted the urge to wrap my arms around his neck and instead kept my hands on his chest, feeling his muscles underneath his thin tank top. My nails dug into him slightly and i could feel the quietest of moans reverberate against my tongue. The way he overwhelmed my mouth had me being dragged back in, over and over, until i was breathless and lightheaded. When he finally parted from me, he stepped back as if nothing had happened. He resumed the need to quench his thirst, momentarily dragging his thumb over his lips and looking at it-presumably to check if i had left lipstick behind.

“What was that?” I asked, definitely confused about how he just kissed me and was acting like it didn't phase him at all while i was feeling like i was crashing down from cloud 9.

“What? Don't act like you've never made out with someone at a party before.” He said simply.

Of course I had, plenty of times but never with someone who's voice i had dreamt about for nights on end. Even though I had connected my fantasy to real life and he had kissed me, I still had to see him as just a voice. I had to keep him at a distance to avoid drowning in him. He also had solidified his stereotype of a party fuckboy only looking for one thing. I couldn't be too mad at him. My list of one night stands was ever growing as well but he was kinda being a douche about it. “I've done a lot of things at parties but-”

“Good, then you know how this goes.”

I wanted to deck him right in that perfect pouty mouth of his. And worst of all, it made me want to fuck him even more. My ability to respond was tossed aside as someone he knew came over and they exchanged loud greetings, slapping each others hands before caving into a ‘no homo' bro hug. His care for me seemed to have been thrown out, leaving me stuck in a corner. I quickly texted Quinn, hoping they weren't sucking face (or dick) as of yet and we could meet up. Johnny continued talking, his radio personality showing through more than when he was with me. I mulled over my next move- to ditch Johnny or wait until he was done talking to see if i could get another breathtaking kiss.

I gave my phone one last check to see if Quinn had responded before pushing myself off the wall and moving through the kitchen. My chest slightly brushed against him as i squeezed past. Taking a quick glance back, I caught him watching me from over his friend’s shoulder. I tossed my hair back and kept walking, smirking to myself a bit. He could chase after me if he wanted but i wasn’t going to wait. I made my way towards the sliding doors, ready to return outside when I was surprised to see another boy I knew. Luckily, he was one that I hadn't slept with. Instead, Doyoung was one of my good friends. Usually he was the one to reel me back in when I got lost in sex filled hazes and needed to concentrate on my life, my job, and school. Having me as a friend was never easy when you had to be the voice of reason. I had never actually seen him at a party let along drinking. I wanted desperately to go talk to him, especially since I hadn't seen him all summer, but he was sitting next to Jungwoo. I was too much of a coward to go down that road so I settled for a small wave, hoping that I might catch Doyoung’s attention instead. His big bunny eyes zeroed in on me and he waved frantically before making his way over.

“Eri! I missed you!” he said before squeezing me to his chest. I could feel the icy cold glass of his beer bottle between my shoulder blades as he held me.

“I did too but more importantly what are you doing drinking?”

He blushed and hid the bottle behind his back, feigning innocence. “Me? Drink? No way! This is uh...um...you know, soda.”

I poked his shoulder playfully. “Yeah, yeah, whatever. You're supposed to be the good one.”

He shrugged and stared down at his shoes. “This was the first time i was ever invited to a party so I thought i'd at least try it. Who did you come with?”

“Lucas and Quinn, the usual. I was babysitting them but Lucas is bouncing around and Quinn has their eyes set on Jaehyun.”

“Jaehyun? The guy from the radio show?”

I nodded.

“Ah...tell her to be careful with him. I've heard some stuff about him and Johnny.”

“Oh?” I raised a brow, my interest peaked. “Like…?”

“That they’re notorious for sleeping around.”

“I mean apparently me too. Have you seen who is at this party?” I laughed.

“Yeah but you don’t have that much under your belt. I’ve heard that they’re like in the 30s or higher for the number of people they’ve slept with. They're kinda gross.” Doyoung made a face of disgust before he took another sip of beer. “Just please tell Quinn to be careful. I don’t want her getting hurt.”

I didn’t have the heart to tell him that I wanted to hook up with Johnny. He would be even more worried and i needed to do my best to keep an eye out on him now that he was drinking. I couldn’t take care of three drunks all at once. I gave him another hug and sighed. “I promise i'll take care of them. And i need you to promise me you wont get too crazy with those beers.”

“You won’t see me passed out i swear! Anyway, come sit with us. We need to catch up.”

“Uh...Jungwoo's there. It's gonna be weird.” I said, nervously.

“No, no. It's totally fine. Besides Ten and Yuta are there too. Taeyong went to the bathroom for a sec. It'll be fine.”

He took my hand and lead me to the group that had taken over the sofa. Jungwoo left as soon as i sat down much to my dismay. I wasnt surprised though. Doyoung tried his best to make him stay but it didn’t help that Ten and Yuta started teasing me for being a heartbreaker. I rolled my eyes and hit them both while Doyoung tried to tell us to behave like he was our mom, making all of us laugh. Somehow hanging around the people I fucked made me feel better and less miserable at this party. It wasn’t so bad after that and our alcohol fueled antics lasted hours. It was full of flirting, a few neck kisses from Yuta, and cute smiles between me and Taeil once he joined our little group. Ten kept close to me, whispering about his plans for next Thursday. Every once in awhile i would catch Johnny circling around. He was keeping his distance from me but our eyes kept meeting every chance they got. He was making a show of wrapping random girls in his arms, smacking their asses, running his fingers through their hair or pulling them close for a kiss but never completing it. He was being a tease and i didnt know if it was solely for them or to be an asshole to me. We knew we had our eyes on each other. I had to admit the best part was having a bunch of guys lust over me while i pick and choose who i wanted for the evening. Johnny was still top tier in the back of my mind. Those basketball shorts barely left anything to the imagination and I was falling deeper into his thirst trap.

Around 3 am the party had died down leaving just a few of us behind. We had gathered by the pool this time, even though it was after the allowed hours, preferring the cool summer night breeze than the stuffy apartment. I sat on a lawn chair, my mind fuzzy and tingling with the small buzz I had going on. I had continued to down a few more ales, some bourbon, whiskey and 1 terrible harsh shot of vodka. Even though i knew i was going to feel like shit tomorrow and that i was supposed to be driving home, i couldn't help myself. For the moment i had forgotten about Johnny, especially since he was still dipping in and out of view. I had instead turned all my attention towards Taeil who was getting closer and closer to taking me home. His sweet demeanor was taking over and I loved the way his cheeks flushed and how his lips curled into a smile with every one of my coy laughs. He pushed his bright red hair back, pretending he wasn’t noticing how close i was getting to him. I listened intently to how Taeil was going to be a tutor for some core classes at the library and I made sure to put emphasis on the fact that i would be definitely needing his help sooner rather than later. His hand came to rest on my knee, slowly edging towards the band of my black thigh high. I joked about having a school fantasy and hoping he would punish me which sent his hand back to cover his face as he blushed harder. Oh, he was just too damn cute. I scooted the lawn chair closer and took his hands in mine, running my thumbs over his knuckles and wondering what his fingers would feel like down my throat.

“I mean, we dont exactly have to wait until next week. We could...have a little study session of our own tonight. I’m so terrible at math.” i giggled.

Taeil folded our fingers together and cocked his head to the side, leaning in just a bit. “Well i should probably tell you something first…”

“Tell me anything, Tae.” I closed my eyes and waited for his lips but instead i felt a harsh yank on the belt loop of my shorts. Taeil backed away again, releasing my hands instantly and looking up at the person behind me. I craned my head backwards to see Johnny looking down at me. He had yet another blunt in his hand, his eyes looking much redder than the last time I saw him.

“We're playing ‘Strip Never Have I Ever’. You want in?” He sniffed.

“What is ‘Strip Never Have I Ever?” Taeil questioned.

“Basically you say something promiscuous that you haven’t done and everyone who has done that thing takes off an article of clothing.” I explained.

“I think I should sit this one out. I'm not one for getting naked in front of strangers.”

“Come on Taeil. Dont you want to see her naked? Even just a little bit?” Johnny seemed to be glaring at Taeil now, a bit of tension rising between them.

Taeil scoffed. “I'm not like you Johnny. I’d rather take my time.”

“Still playing that innocent shit, huh?” Johnny took another toke, the fingers of his free hand still wrapped in my belt loop, pulling me back towards him.

“I have no idea what you're talking about.”

Johnny scoffed. “Of course you dont.” He rolled his eyes. “You never do.”

“Johnny, your jealous side is showing again.” Taeil set his chin on his hand, a smirk tweaking at the sides of his lips.

“So…are we gonna stop this pissing contest and play or…?” I said, a bit annoyed at their tense banter.

“Yeah, sure babe.” Johnny said as he finally broke the glaring contest between he and Taeil.

I removed Johnny's hands from my shorts and stood up, focusing my attention to the other man. “Would you mind getting me another beer and whatever else is laying around, please?”

He nodded and stood up, giving me a sweet kiss on the cheek. “Sure thing. Save me a spot by you. I'll play just because you are.” He headed back towards the sliding doors leading to the apartment leaving Johnny and I by ourselves.

“Dont let him fool you.” Johnny said once Taeil was out of ear shot.

“Oh he's fooling me? Funny. I kinda heard the same thing about you. It also just sounds like you might be jealous.” I crossed my arms under my chest, looking up at him.

“Jealous is hardly the right word. But if you want to be disappointed tonight then go with him.”

“You dont think i’d find you disappointing? Not even in the slightest?” I teased.

“I know you wouldn’t be. I’m not fooling you on anything. You can see for yourself later.” He grabbed a hold of my hip and pulled me closer to him.

“How many girls did you use that line on tonight? The blonde? Both the brunettes? The girl with the orange hair?”

“How many times did you let Yuta kiss your neck? Or let Ten almost try and choke you in front of everyone?”

“He wasn’t going to choke me...that time. But i guess you were watching me as much as i was watching you.” I said, knowing it was the truth.

“I just want to get you out them shorts is all. Who do you think suggested the game?” He winked at me before heading over to our circle of friends who were drunkenly calling out for us to join them. Taeil came back then with some beers and a cup of whatever he had concocted. Our spot was between Ten and Johnny but I had noticed Doyoung swaying while Yuta tried to steady him. I went over to them giving my sweet boy the once over.

“How many has he had? I asked.

“Literally like three beers. He’s such a lightweight.” Yuta teased.

I hit his shoulder gently. “Be nice. Doyoung, do you want to go home with me later? You can sleep on the couch.” I pet back his dark hair as he giggled.

“Im cool, im cool, im coooooolll. I got this!” Doyoung pawed at my hand, willing me away from him. “I'm not a baby, Eri!”

“I'm just worried about you is all. Don't get too crazy.”

“Let him be, you party pooper!” Quinn chimed in.

“You hush! You're already sloshed and I’m surprised you're not already naked.”

“Isn't that what this game is for?” They replied.

I sighed. “I guess I will have three babies to take home tonight.” I booped Quinn on their forehead gently before sitting back in my spot. “Who's starting first then?

“I'll do it!” Quinn offered. “Never have I ever been tied up.”

“Oh come on! Really?!” I said as Ten, Yuta, and I booed at them. Of course we were the easy targets with all the shit we had done together. I tossed off a sneaker while Ten went to take off his collar.

“Nah-uh. Jewelry doesn’t count. Clothes only.” Taeyong interjected.

“Damn, dont be so eager to see me naked.” Ten tossed off his black v-neck while Yuta kicked off a sandal.

Quinn nudged Doyoung signaling him to go but he had such a bad case of the drunken giggles it took him minutes to compose himself and think of something. I resisted the urge to facepalm as i watched him. “Doyoung, honey. Go lay down.” I pleaded.

“No! I got it! Never have i ever s-smoked weed!” He burst into another round of giggles before Jaehyun scoffed.

“That's fuckin’ wack! Here.” Jaehyun took the blunt out of Johnny’s hand and handed it over to Doyoung. “Inhale and hold it in for a bit.”

“No! No! Dont you dare!” I blocked Jaehyun from passing the blunt over. “Hes already drunk from a few beers. He's gonna lose it from one toke. Just take off your clothes so we can move onto Yuta.”

“You first.” He snapped back at me.

I stuck my tongue out at him. “It doesn’t apply to me, jackass.”

“Well maybe if you smoked a bit too then you wouldn’t be so bitchy. Let him have fun.”

“Why dont you fucking eat my ass, dipshit.”

“Wait no, can you please do that to me instead?” Quinn said suddenly.

“Will ya'll shut up and get back to the game? Doyoung’s smoking anyway.” Yuta snorted before falling into a laughing fit himself. While i had been fighting with Jaehyun, Doyoung had stolen the outstretched blunt and inhaled deeply. I could tell the moment he felt the burning in his chest. His eyes watered as he sputtered and coughed. Jaehyun cackled as he took the blunt back, getting in a hit of his own.

“You sure you don’t want any, goodie two shoes?” Jaehyun offered again.

“Id rather not.” I flicked his snapback off his head. “There. One article of clothing down. Yuta, please go before I strangle him.” I scooted back to my spot, a permanent pout on my face.

“You need to chill out.” Johnny whispered as he leaned in close to me. “You’re so tense. You know what would help with that?”

“Having my friend returned home safely and not passed out in his own-”

“Never have i ever had office sex!” Yuta exclaimed.

My mouth hung open, the rest of my statement dissipating in the air.

“Oohhh he got you and Taeyong!” Ten laughed. “Take it off, baby! Take it off!”

“Did you two really fuck in an office?” Jaehyun asked, staring at Taeyong and I. “Where even at?”

I chucked off my other shoe and grumbled as Taeyong pulled his shirt over his head. “Office of student affairs last semester.” he answered.

“Well damn, student affairs is right.” Johnny laughed.

I shrugged. “Shit goes down in offices and so does Taeyong.” There was a chorus of ‘ooohs’ as Taeyong gave me the finger.

“Fuck off. I made the door shake, didnt i?”

“It was up against the door??” Taeil asked, surprised.

Dammit, I really didn’t need him to hear my history now. Yuta was out to get me, Doyoung was already fucked up, Taeil was going to find out all the dirty things I’d done with almost everyone in this group and it was only the 4th round. Ten cleared his throat as I dodged Taeils question even though he was poking my side to tease me.

“Settle down children, settle down. I got a semi decent one. It’s easier to think about what i have done instead what i haven't. Anyway, never have I ever had like slow or sensual sex.”

“What!? That's a fuckin’ lie. Even i've done that. What about your first time?” Lucas interjected.

Ten shrugged. “Nope. Not really. I wasn’t nervous so we just kinda...did it. So, come on. Give something up.” Most everyone lost an article of clothing. I was curious to see that Taeil had only lost a shoe during the weed round but didnt remove anything else this time around, which meant he was either just as kinky as Ten or a complete virgin. I didn’t see him as the latter so my interest was extremely peaked at this point.

“Aren’t you going to take something off?” I asked him, returning his teasing notion.

“I don’t kiss and tell.” He winked at me and i couldn’t help but giggle as I felt the blush start to creep back into my cheeks. I tried to hide it by busying myself with trying to get one of my thigh highs off and deflect my infiltrating thoughts of a kinky Taeil when i felt Johnny's hand over mine.

“Leave those for last.”

“What for?” I asked, barely looking back at him.

He smirked and rubbed his thumb gently across my thigh. “I like them. They look good on you.”

“You're going to have to do some better convincing than that.”

Johnny grabbed the collar of his tank top and pulled it over his head leaving him bare chested and my mouth watering. I drank in each muscle he had on his torso, wanting to kiss every inch of him and follow that cute little happy trail to what was under his shorts. I was silently begging to get more rounds in as soon as possible.

“Convinced yet?” he asked, cockily..

I rolled my eyes, pretending that it was such a hassle for me to leave my socks for last. However, I stood up and undid the buttons of my high waisted shorts, shimmying them down my thighs before kicking them behind me. I adjusted my lacy black panties, feeling all eyes on me.

“Why is there even a bow on the back?” Taeyong asked.

“Because my ass is a present, thanks.”

“Gimmmeeeeee!” I heard Quinn say, making grabby hand motions at me.

“No, you get it tomorrow, if you're good!” I joked.

“You guys are gonna fuck?” Jaehyun asked, looking at Quinn curiously. “Can I watch?”

“Nope sorry, that is off limits. For my eyes only.” Lucas said, beckoning for Jae to share the blunt he was still working on. He passed it over to Lucas who took it graciously.

“What do you mean for your eyes only? Share the wealth.” Jae said.

“How about no one watches anything. We’re not a damn spectacle. What Quinn and I do is none of your business. ANYWAY, Taeil your turn. Please go. Please.”

“Shoot. Uh…” He looked around at all of us trying to think of a good statement. “Um...never have I ever had a one night stand?”

“Really??? That's literally like...my entire life.” Lucas laughed.

Johnny rolled his eyes. “Never had a one night stand...pfft okay.”

Taeil just laughed. “Dont be mad because you're losing, Johnny”

“Yeah me and practically everyone else.” Johnny tossed off his snapback while i realized i had to discard my shirt. Technically, i didn’t but i decided to appease Johnny a little bit longer and leave the thigh highs for last. I pulled my crop top over my head, revealing my bare chest (who had time for fucking bras anyway) before pulling my hair over my shoulders to have a little bit of coverage. Lucas whistled at me, giving me a wink which made me roll my eyes. Johnny licked his lips, a smile on his face while Taeil tried to sneak looks without being too obvious, which he was failing at. I hugged my knees to my chest and realized that it was actually my turn to go.

I had to think of something i had never done. Not that it specifically had to be something sexual, but that was definitely more fun than ‘Never have i ever been to Korea’. “Oh! I got it. Never have I ever eaten ass before.”

“Boo, you whore!” Ten said, taking off his fishnet shirt and tossing it at me. I caught it and laughed, knowing that we were still neck in neck in the race to lose first. Quinn, Ten, and almost surprisingly Yuta discarded another piece of clothing. Only a few more rounds and someone would be naked. Lucas was coming up quick, only having his underwear (presumably) and shorts on.

It was up to Johnny now. I looked over at him as he switched his preference to a cigarette. I definitely was wondering what he was going to say. He exhaled slowly before speaking. “Never have i ever done anal.”

“Wait, wait, wait,” Taeyong slurred a bit as he had been nursing his drink. “Giving or receiving?”

“Either or. Any anal at all.”

Quinn, Lucas, Ten, Yuta, and I pulled off yet another article of clothing. I wasn’t going to take off my underwear just yet so one thigh high came off. I set it in Johnny's lap, mouthing a fake apology coupled with a shrug. He tapped his ashes into an empty beer bottle and sighed. “Damn, was really hoping you'd take those panties off first.”

“Of course you were.” I snatched his cigarette from him and took a deep drag, frowning when i tasted the menthol. Ugh, fuckboys always smoked menthols. He let me keep it though, enjoying the disgusted face i made.

“Alright, Taeyong, Lucas is down to his undies. How are you gonna get him out of them?” Quinn asked as they leaned on Jaehyun's shoulder.

“Not that I want to see him naked but never have I ever had public sex.” He said.

“You fucked in an office!” Yuta protested.

“I meant like a park or parking lot or something!!”

“Well, there we go.” Lucas stood up and dropped his briefs before sprinting towards the pool, landing with a huge splash and getting water everywhere. “We better figure out who's runner up so I wont be in this pool by myself!”

“You're the idiot who jumped in there! Besides it's your turn!” Taeyong tossed a beer cap at Lucas who dodged it. I had to rid myself of the other thigh high for the public sex and i was definitely afraid of having to lose my underwear from what Lucas was going to say.

“Shit. Ok. Uh… got it! Never have i ever sucked dick before.”

Ten and I both collectively groaned as we were deemed the next losers. Johnny had the biggest smile plastered on, his eyes glued to me as i rested my hands on the waistband of my panties. I didn’t want to take them off and was hoping that everyone would magically forget that i had ever sucked their dicks before. Ten on the other hand was already tossing off his pants. Ten rarely wore underwear, if ever, so his pants were the last article of clothing he had on. Never ashamed of being naked, he joined Lucas in the chilly pool water.

“Eeeerrrriiiiii. Come on. Be a good girl and take them off!” Lucas teased.

“Shut up! Maybe i don't wanna!” i buried my face in my knees. I was already losing my buzzed feeling and embarrassment was taking over at the prospect of losing my last bit of clothing around 3 new people and my baby Doyoung.

“Dont be a wimp.” Johnny said as he dug his finger into the waistband of my panties and snapped it against my skin. “These definitely need to go.”

I didnt bother looking up, only swatted at his hand, trying to get him away from me. “Will you stop it!”

“Toss her in if she doesnt do it!” I heard Ten yell.

“What! Don't you dare!” I felt Johnny's strong arms wrap around my waist as he hauled me up easily. I kicked at him as i tried to cover my chest but he wasn't budging.

“One last chance, sweetness.” He said lowly against the sensitive skin of my neck. It was that voice...the one i listened to, the one i dreamt about, the one that turned me on in an instant. I shivered against him, suddenly taking in how warm he felt and the bulge in his boxer briefs pressing into the small of my back. I looked up at him, my breath a little heavier. There were plenty of chants and whistles especially since almost everyone was abandoning whatever they had left on and jumping in.

“Let me go! I have to check on Doyoung!” I half lied. I actually did want to check on him as he had curled up in a small ball and passed out.

“Dont worry. I'll take care of him. You two have fun.” Taeil said tensely as he hauled Doyoung to his feet.

“Oh we fuckin’ will. Bye Taeil.” Johnny smirked. I wanted to elbow Johnny for being a dick to Taeil. I tried to hit his chest but he just grabbed onto my boobs and squeezed them. I tried to pry his hands off me, telling him to let me go as Taeil passed us.

The redhead turned back to us. “Hey Eri.”

I looked up at him, mid-squirm. “Y-yeah?”

“Don’t forget to come to the library, ok? Ill give you a good lesson.” He winked at me before leaving the pool area with Doyoung stumbling beside him.

My mouth hung open momentarily but i was finally able to shove Johnny off me. I covered my chest and smiled at him. “Um, you bet...see ya.”

“Are you gonna get fucking naked or keep making kissy faces at Taeil all night?!” Ten yelled before splashing water at me.

“Ass!!” I screamed. Suddenly i felt a hand on my back and i was pushed in, sinking into the deeper part of the pool. My body struggled to accommodate my lack of height and inability to swim. Lucas scooped me up against him and i was grateful he stopped me from choking.

“I hate all of you.” I sputtered.

“We just love seeing you wet is all.” Ten chimed in sarcastically. I splashed water in his direction as Lucas still tried to hold me up. Ten stuck his tongue out at me. “Dont you have to go to the kiddie side of the pool?”

“Oh youre one to talk!” I said splashing at him again. “You little shit!”

“Why are you so angry all the time?” Taeyong said as he finally slid into the pool along with Jaehyun and Quinn.

“Dont you know, all she does is bite and scratch.” Yuta snorted.

“I haven’t had any complaints yet.” I shot back at him. “Lucas will you let me go? Im leaving you fuckers and going where i can’t drown.”

Lucas shrugged and let me waddle to the opposite end of the pool. I was hoping that my makeup wasn’t running down my face and making me look like a Dali painting. I was busy pressing my index finger to my lashes trying to make sure my mascara wouldn’t fall into my eye that i had hardly noticed that i couldn’t move any further. I was up against the side of the pool, a position i was apparently getting used to being in tonight with Johnny around. He had his hands on either side of me, that same smirk on his lips as he knew he had me right where he wanted. “You still haven’t taken off your panties.”

“Yeah well you haven’t taken your underwear off either!” I said looking down at his waist through the blue tinted water.

“I didnt lose. You did. And you have to play by the rules.”

“Hah. Playing by the rules didn’t get me where i am today.”

“Almost naked in a pool about to get fucked, you mean?”

“Precisely.” I replied, thrilled at his renewed interest. “But i'll give you the age old ultimatum. I'll show you mine if you show me yours.”

“Done.” He reached under the water and wiggled out of his boxer briefs, throwing them poolside. I swallowed hard, my head tilting to the side as i saw him. “Off. Now.” he commanded.

I stood frozen for a second still staring until i felt his hands on my hips pulling the soaked fabric down, not waiting for my go ahead. I kicked my legs out of my panties and he set them beside his. “There, now was that so hard?”

“No but Im sure you will be.”

“Halfway there.” His hands slid down the curve of my hips to cup my ass and pull me closer to him. I wrapped my arms around his neck, almost afraid that he was going to somehow launch me back underwater.

“I take it you're an ass man?”

“I'm an everything man. I don’t normally go for chicks that look like you but…” He licked his lips as he looked down at me flushed against his chest.

“Well don’t i feel special! I’m not the fuckboy's type but he still wants to fuck me. Oh me oh my!”

“Well compared to your track record over there.” Johnny nodded towards the band of idiots that i had all slept with. “I say i'm not your type either, Ms. Kink loving, anal-having, office sex wanting fuckgirl.”

“Did you take a look at Lucas? You're both big and tall with hands that could…” I refrained from saying what was on my mind.

“Hands that could what?” He tilted my chin up and traced the outline of my bottom lip with his tongue before giving me a chaste kiss. “That could finger you so deep and hard that you cum in minutes?”

“W-well i-”

He gave me another kiss, tugging my bottom lip between his teeth just a bit and sucking on it. “Or hands that could bruise your hips as i fuck you from behind?”

“You really think you're that good?” I panted as I managed to find my voice again.

“So i’ve been told but the dozens and dozens of chicks that have been in my bed.”

“Well you've never had me in your bed and to be honest i'm the only one that matters.”

“Damn. Where was that confidence when you needed to take off your panties, huh? Or do you just like to be a cocky little shit when you're about to get some?” Johnny said.

“Ask Ten. He'll tell you I can be a bit of brat when I want to be.”

Johnny chuckled. “I can definitely see that. Gonna have to find a way to occupy that mouth instead.”

“I can think of a few ways.” I pulled his head closer to mine and closed that minuscule distance between us again. I was eager to make him stop talking and instead focus everything he had on kissing me. He hoisted my leg around his waist, digging himself deep between my thighs. His hand then slid up my leg until it gripped my hip, guiding me to grind against him. Barely audible sighs of pleasure were exchanged between us. Every parting of our lips was a chance for our tongues to collide while every closing enacted bites and warm sucks. His other hand slid down my stomach to my parted thighs, his thick fingers caressing what i wanted him to touch the most.

The first finger was tentative, easing in with languid rubs and curling every time my breath would catch in my throat from his kiss. The smirk against my lips told me he was toying with me, wanting to draw out my torture for as long as possible. He pulled one last kiss before moving his attention to my neck. My forehead rested around his shoulder, my hands pressed between his shoulder blades. “You like this, dont you?”

“You’re hotter when you dont talk.”

“What?”

I looked up at him and pressed my finger to his lips. “Dont talk. Just keep fingering me.”

His tongue clicked against his cheek as he shook his head in disbelief. He didn’t stop his fingers though, instead he pressed another into me as his teeth sunk into the sensitive skin of my neck. My teeth bit down onto my bottom lip, shielding my moan from escaping. I rolled my hips deeper, wanting him to prove exactly how fast he could make me cum.

Suddenly a huge splash doused us, making Johnny pull away from me completely. “What the fuck!?” He yelled, wiping the water away from his face. Lucas had a giant grin on his face while Ten and Yuta were making fake orgasmic sounds and screaming “Yes daddy!”

“Are ya'll really about to fuck in this pool in front of us?!” Lucas laughed.

Crap. I had literally been so caught up in Johnny i totally had forgotten we were basically putting on a show. I shoved Johnny away and tried to cover myself knowing full well those three idiots would give me shit for it later. I tried to find an escape route but i realized my clothes were strewn about and there were no towels in sight. I would have to rush out naked and try and gather everything while the boys continued their bickering. I walked up the small ladder and out of the pool, hustling to gather my clothes and tiptoe through the grass, hating the way the blades were sticking to my feet and the dirt was becoming muddy from my dripping.

I went into the apartment, awkwardly standing around since i didn't know which room belonged to him. I needed a damn towel asap. A breeze was flowing through the open doors making the pool water turn icy on my skin. “Tell me again why you fuck those idiots?!” Johnny shouted as he came into the apartment.

I shrugged. “Same reason we were gonna hook up. I’m horny and you’re hot. But right now I’m freezing. Do you have a towel?”

“Yeah,” He rolled his eyes and headed over to the door on the left, kicking things out the way as we stepped through. “Come on.” I followed him into his room. There were clothes everywhere as well as old condom wrappers, fast food bags, and empty starbucks cups. I stared at the mess in disgust then up at him as he handed me a towel. “Did you get that from the floor?” i asked.

“You wanted one, didn’t you?”

I stared at him, squinting slightly. “Did you get this from the floor?”

“It was from behind my damn door, ok? You gonna dry off so we can fuck or what?””

I rolled my eyes and took the stupid towel, drying off as best as i could. My hair was a mess and I pulled it up into a bun, still feeling the pool water drip down my neck. Johnny tossed his own towel on the pile of dirty laundry after he dried off and stepped closer to me. “Now where were we?”

I sighed. “I actually should probably get going. It's getting late…”

“And?”

“And i'm tired. I'm gonna have to fish out Quinn and Lucas.”

He licked his lips and pushed his jet black hair back. “You literally were begging me to keep fingering you in my pool. You think i'm gonna let the boys you play with ruin the mood? Come here.”

“They don’t matter right now but I-”

His hands were on my hips then, lifting me up easily. My body instinctively wrapped my limbs around him, shocked senseless at his first move. My mouth was suddenly dry as we were now on the same level and his eyes met mine. I was trying to say something, anything at all, but i was sure my mouth was just doing the motions and making me look like a gaping fish. He carried me over to his bed laying me down and spreading my knees apart. “We were here, right?” He asked as he rubbed his fingers through my folds, making purposeful stops at my clit and rubbing the smallest of circles before diving his fingers back down again.

My eyes fluttered closed and I nodded my head. My hips followed each languid stroke, wanting him to touch every nerve i had. I could feel the droplets of water from his bangs splatter onto my stomach, the iciness making me twitch as my skin started to heat up. His lips kissed away the droplets, his tongue tracing intimate patterns into my skin. I felt a small bite right above my hip bone and I covered my mouth with the back of my hand, keeping my decibels down. His eyes flickered up towards me, an expression of curiosity within them.

“You’re quiet.” He stated, almost surprised. “Aren’t you going to start moaning?”

“You haven’t don’t enough to make me moan.” I fibbed. “Remember what i said before? You're hotter when you don’t talk.”

“Fine. Whatever.” He moved himself slowly up to meet my face as his fingers dug into me, a steady beat of push and pull while his thumb focused those teasing circles against my bundle of nerves again. “I just figured you’d start screaming my name sooner or later.”

“Ugh, no thank you. You still haven’t proved any-” The end of my sentence turned into a sharp inhale of breath as he curled his fingers against my walls, pressing into a spot i could rarely reach on my own.

“What was that?” he smirked.

I gripped onto his bicep, squeezing my eyes shut as I tried to match his motions. I rolled my body with each curl of his fingers, bounced my hips with each harsh thrust, and arched every time he would graze against that devilish spot. I could feel him watching me beneath him, my chest heaving as i desperately wanted to cum already. My tongue parted my lips, licking them slowly before i caved in and moaned. At this point I was still determined not to say his stupid name or beg for that matter but he sure as hell was making it hard. I dug my nails into his tender skin just as his knuckles hit my entrance, filling me completely with the thickness of his fingers.

“Damn…” I heard him whisper amidst my whimpers and the sounds of him working through my slickness. His lips brushed against my ear, his warm breath tickling my lobe as that deep, silky smooth voice left him. “You're gonna look so good wrapped around me.”

That was the cheesiest and wackest line I had ever heard but that voice made my entire face flush and my body clamp down on him tight. That stupid voice. I hated what it did to me. I hated that it sent my mind reeling back to all the nights I had masturbated to it over the radio. I tried to protest but no words were coming out. He was working himself faster now, a rough cycle of ‘come here’ motions and thrusts that had me helpless. I arched my hips again, my toes digging into his calves as i was ready to fall into my orgasm. Then he pulled his fingers out, wiping them on the sheets, and leaving me out in the cold. He got up from the bed and went over to his dresser, rifling through his top drawer.

I glared at him, a rough and annoyed breath slipping out. Did he really just leave me hanging like that? I sat up on my elbows, seeing a flash of gold in his fist. “First of all, fuck you. Second of all, why did you stop, you shitty tease?”

“I had to get a condom? Im not gonna fuck you without one.” He tore open the package and slid the rubber on before making his way back to me. He was ready to resume his place above me but my heart leapt into my throat as I saw him fully.

“WHOA! PAUSE! PAUSE!” I exclaimed, outstretching my hands to keep a bit of distance between us. “Why didn't you tell me you had….all of that!?”

He shrugged simply. “It was kinda cold in the pool. Does it matter?”

“Yes it matters! That’s...!” I covered my face as I flopped back onto the mattress, trying to convince myself that it wasn’t going to be so bad. So far Lucas had been the biggest I had ever had and he was mostly length. Johnny was on a different level and i was convinced i was going to die from him scrambling my insides. I felt him ease my face back towards his before pulling my hands away.

“Chill. Im not gonna barge in there. I have done this a few times before, you know.” His eyes raked over my body as he licked his lips. “Just relax for me, baby. I swear i'll treat you right.”

I almost gagged as his tired old lines. “Yeah that's easy for you to say. You're not the one about to have your guts in your throat.”

“Jesus, if you want to puss out on me just tell me so I don’t have to waste my time anymore. I could’ve had someone else here instead.” He rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, i doubt it with the way you were begging me to keep my thigh highs on and sit by you.” I sighed softly. “Just….go slow. Or else i'll hit you.”

“If you do i'll kick your ass out. I dont care.”

I pouted and looked away, my cheeks still warm. “Fine….sorry.”

It was his turn to sigh before pressing his lips to mine way softer than he had before. The tip of his cock was already trying to sink into me and i forced my body to relax as much as possible. I focused on his lips, the way he felt against me, his hands rubbing up and down my hips and thighs, and the soft groans he was slipping into my mouth. He would stop every so often when i would wince or become too tight for him.

I adjusted myself beneath him, trying to gauge how much he had left until he was almost completely inside me. We avoided eye contact this time though his thumb was making lazy swipes on my hip. I did appreciate that he wasn’t so much of an asshole and took his time with me. It was actually pretty...cute. I wanted him to feel good, for us to feel good, while he fucked me. Feeling him already so warm and stretching me to my limits was starting to make me squirm in anticipation.

Minutes went by as he alternated between minuscule thrusts and sucks to all my erogenous zones, trying to turn me on more to pull my wetness around him. Eventually his thrusts became more fluid and less overwhelming as I finally adjusted. I pulled his head closer, licking his lips slowly before giving him a firm chaste kiss. “I want you to fuck me, ok?”

He nodded quickly, switching his tactics instantly. He took control of my mouth again, commanding my tongue as he pulled his hips back slowly. The returning thrust was a harsh snap and it made me sink my nails deeper into his flesh. He paused again, gauging if it was too much for me to handle. I shook my head and breathed out a shaky ‘dont stop’. He gripped the edge of the mattress just above my head, using it as leverage to work himself into a faster tempo. The pain was underlying the pleasure still but i didn't mind it at all now. I was faltering back against him, a cadence of mewls and strangled breaths tumbling from my lips. His teeth found my neck once more, nipping at the weak spot just beneath my jawbone. I slid my fingers up the length of his broad shoulders and neck to the soft fuzziness of his undercut before grabbing a hold of his longer tresses and pulling.

“Bite harder. I'm not fragile.”

“Oh now you're tough shit, hmm?” he chuckled before yanking my hand from his hair. “You sure you don’t want me to keep going slow? Those sounds you make are pretty cute.”

“I’m positive, asshole. And i wasn’t making any sounds. It was just breathing or whatever. Shut up.”

“Get on your stomach then. And don’t give me any complaints either.”

I swallowed hard, staring up into the dark pools of his eyes and trying to register a command I wasn’t prepared for. When i didn’t move fast enough he forced my hips down, my stomach meeting the mattress for a microsecond before I was pulled onto my knees. My thighs rested on the outside of his, my small legs struggling to accommodate fitting him between me. His hands made my wrists disappear in his grip and kept me pinned down firmly. The breath felt like it was getting knocked out of me as his thrusts were painting vivid stories of pleasure throughout my entire being. My skin was blooming with sinfully hard bites on my shoulders. A low short growl rumbled against my skin and for the first time i whimpered his name, wanting it to be the only thing that ran through my mind.

His name on my tongue only spurred him on further. His blunt nails made crescent marks on the underside of my wrist as my veins pulsated against the tender skin. He moved one of them from beside my head, guiding my hand down to the incredibly pleasure filled center he was invading. His finger tips folded over mine, leading me to resume the attention to my clit that I so desperately needed. My face pressed into the mattress as I wanted to muffle the acute sobs building in my throat. My idle hand bunched the fitted sheet in my fist tugging it from the corners of the bed. “Please...” The word escaped before I could even think to stop it.

“Please what?” He teased, that sultry voice making my entire body shudder. Of course he was one of those guys that got off on making me say what i wanted and inflating his ego. I pushed my face into the mattress deeper, not wanting him to see the begging look on my face. Johnny let out a stiff grunt before he pressed his hand into my spine, making my back bow more. His other hand tore my hips higher, the tips of his fingers finding the dip in my hip bone that never failed to make me squirm. My thighs quivered as he pushed into it more, the V of his waist hitting my ass repeatedly. My teeth grabbed at my lip again as my toes tried to steady my weakening form. I tensed, clenching around his thickness as the head of his cock tormented the deepest part of me. I felt him shudder, a strained groan coming from him.

“F-fuck...babe. Relax for me.”

Easy for you to say. I thought. You’re not the one getting railed in half.

He pressed harder into me, if that was even possible. Every ridge, every vein, riding against me. Little by little, he eased his hand from my hip to rest on my shoulder dangerously close to my neck. He was trying to steady himself, to reel back his control and resist the urge to cum just yet. He cursed under his breath as his panting was getting heavier. I tilted my head towards my shoulder, trying to urge him to grab my throat. Choking always got me closer to cumming faster than most things but he pulled away his hand quickly as if i had burned him. I looked back at him momentarily, about ready to ask if he would just do it but i saw the way his lip was caught between his perfect teeth, his eyes closed shut, eyelashes dusting the tops of his cheeks. It turned my stomach into a gooey mess of emotions especially after he let out a deeper groan, his chest tensing just a bit as his brows furrowed. “Johnny...”

He nodded, letting out a simple ‘mhm’ before pulling me up to his chest. He forced my head towards his, engulfing my mouth in a rushed heated kiss while both our hands melded together once more between my folds. I reached my other hand back to cup his head, twisting my fingers in his hair again. Our fingers were working faster together against my clit as he rolled his hips up into me, making us both teeter on the edge. He swallowed hard, pressing his forehead against mine as i felt him throb inside me. A warm feeling filled my stomach, making me shudder and whine as i followed his orgasm. I slumped back against him as i tried to regain my breath and stop my legs from quivering. I was definitely going to feel that tomorrow.

Only a few sparse moment passed before Johnny cleared his throat.“So…You good to leave?”

I blinked a few times in disbelief. I rarely stood over with one night stands but we had barely just finished and already he was kicking me out? My entire demeanor changed. “Yeah, I’m fucking good to leave. Just give me a sec, damn.” i hissed.

He pulled out of me slowly, leaving me to collapse onto his mattress. I heard him rummaging around his room, the flick of a lighter going off at some point. I was curled up on my side, my body betraying my will to move and not give him the satisfaction of kicking me out. I was trying my best to get but my eyes were fluttering closed. Johnny tapped my ass before shaking me by my hip.

“Up. Now.” He yawned deeply before crawling into bed. “You’re not staying here.”

“I know jackass.” I said, following up with a yawn of my own. “Two seconds though.”

“Two seconds.” He closed his eyes and folded his arm across them, settling beside me. I was getting up. Right now.

“Fuck!” I gasped as i shot up from my sleep. I had felt a shift in the bed beside me as Johnny had rolled onto his side. I realized that i had fallen asleep at his place. Shitshitshitshitshit. I wasn't supposed to stay here. I was supposed to get up after a few seconds, leave, pretend that i didn’t just have the hottest sex of my life and that i totally didnt want him again. Now my plan was ruined because it was probably around 6 am when we were done. I barely got any sleep and time was starting to feel like a joke that made me more disoriented. I looked at the wad of my clothes on the floor and slipped out of bed, hissing as my stomach clenched in pain. Great. Just great. I scrambled over to my clothes and pulled on my shorts and top, not even bothering with my socks. i stuffed my feet into my sneakers and hobbled into the living room.

Luckily, I found Lucas facedown on the couch. He had managed to pull his shorts on at least after the escapade in the pool. Quinn was curled up on top of him, still mostly naked. I rushed over, shaking them violently awake. “Let's go, let's go, let's go!” i whispered harshly.

Quinn woke up first. It looked like they hadn't been asleep for long. “Finally! I was waiting for you! You made me sleep over and i NEVER sleep over.”

“I’m sorry! I accidentally passed out. Trust me I didn’t want to sleep here either but Johnny wore me out. It took forever to get him mostly all the way in.”

“Well damn...how big was he?”

“Magnum size big. Lets go.”

Quinn clutched at their chest. “Ohh girl...that's a journey.”

“I know. Will you come on?! I don't want to be here any longer than you do.” I slapped Lucas on the back, watching as his head popped up.

“H-huh?”

“Get up. We're leaving.” He rolled over as Quinn jumped off him and started putting on their clothes.

“What time is it? I feel like shit.”

“Doesn’t matter. Up. Get your shoes on.” I sighed. It was like corralling toddlers.

Lucas was finally able to get up and i practically pushed the both of them out the door. Lucas was able to find a few more of his clothes over by the pool as we shuffled along, making our way slowly to my car. I needed to sleep for 80 years and hoped to god i would be able to walk normally later.

The Boys Group Chat

Johnny: whaddup

Johnny: i lowkey only remember like half of last night lol

Yuta: fuckin mood

Yuta: we got naked in the pool didnt we?

Taeil: yall did. I didnt. I took care of DY. He was passed tf out

Johnny: aww damn does that mean you didnt get to see me fuck that girl you wanted

Taeil: I saw you acting like a damn fool. I’m not too worried anyway. Im gonna tutor her soon enough👅

Ten: and use that tired ass ‘im a virgin line’? Lmao

Taeil: listen it gets me more pussy than you will ever know. Chicks dig that sensitive innocent guy shit. The library is my sanctuary

Ten: one day somebody is gonna call you out on that whack ass shit or find out that youre always lying about being a virgin

Jae: what you gonna do then? Youre gonna have to find some other shit to lie about lol

Taeil: no ones gonna find out. Shut up. It works every year

Yuta: im surprise u havent lost ur damn job yet tbh

Taeil: what can i say im good at what i do

Johnny: anyway wtf was that chicks name that i hooked up with? I cant remember

Ten: johnny ur a damn idiot

Johnny: what?????

Yuta: ur kinda going down a dark hole so good luck with that

Taeil: she doesnt seem that bad

Yuta: LMAO

Ten: 😂😂😂😂

Johnny: whats wrong with her? She postal or something? Aint u two fuckin her too???

Ten: well yeah but she’s a handful

Yuta: to say the very LEAST

Taeil: ok we get it. Shes kinky and has poor lapses in judgement to hook up with you guys over and over

Ten: im sure you’ll find out soon enough. Shes something alright

Johnny: what do you mean? Shes not gonna like key my car or something right? I dont have time for that shit again tbh.

Jae: i havent talked to the girl I fucked about her much but like i can probs get u her snap. Or ask lucas. I think hes up her ass too

Johnny: who hasnt she slept with???

Taeyong: oh are we talking about who i think we are?

Yuta: way to come in late lmao but ya

Taeyong: oh shit lol. i mean we went over this during truth or dare.

Taeil: you mean never have i ever

Taeyong: same shit. anyway out of all of us she hasn’t touched taeil (yet), Dy or Jae….well Jae might be in waiting

Jae: fuck no. Not my type at all. she seems too damn mouthy

Ten: i mean once you gag her shes fine lmaoooooo

Johnny: yeah she kept telling me to shut up

Johnny: and she barely like….screamed or moaned or anything

Johnny: it was all these tiny little sounds

Taeil: maybe you didnt give it to her good enough

Taeyong: no. Thats literally her. I was fuckin destroying her hips against the door and she barely made a peep. Idfk whats wrong with her

Yuta: i think shes made the most noise with me and thats probably because i work her hard enough but even then i cant get a scream out

Jae: meanwhile the chick i slept with wouldnt fuckin stop making noise.

Johnny: jae your ass is loud too. sounding like a monkey thats out of breath

Taeil: fuck🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Ten: lmaooooooo

Yuta: get WRECKT

Jae: fuck all of you

Jae: forreal

Jae: i cant stand yall

Jae: anyway maybe its good that shes quiet all you fucking get are screamers anyway

Johnny: i know! Especially that one chinese chick i hooked up like last semester. Jfc she wouldnt stop.

Johnny: Idk i didnt mind her not saying much i guess but it was just weird to me

Jae: bro u barely make any sounds either. All i be hearing are your girls

Johnny: 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️

Johnny: anyway wtf is her name lol

Ten: Eri you idiot

Yuta: just Eri lol Thats what she always says

Johnny: whats her @ on snap?

Yuta: fuck

Yuta: hold on

Taeyong: its mistresseri13

Jae: LMAO

Taeyong: 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️

Yuta: the bigger point is johnny fuckin suh KING of one night stands is whipped for a girl and actually wants to talk to her again

Ten: oooohhhhh true. U never hook up with the same person twice

Taeyong: i mean shes good but you really want to hook up with her again?

Yuta: ty uve been tryna hook up with her since the office thing dont lie.

Taeyong: stfu

Taeil: lmao. So now johnny's whipped for her. she must be good in the sack then

Ten: mostly shes just nice to play with. U can do almost anything with her

Lucas: why are yall blowing up my fuckin phoneeeeeeeee!!!!! im tryin to sleep

Jae: bro its like 4 in the afternoon

Lucas: yeah and? Im hungover af

Yuta: are u at the dorm?

Lucas: no. Babes making me pancakes

Taeil: babe? Babe who??? Who the hell did you get to actually cook for you?

(Downloading picture)

Taeil: is that Eri in the kitchen? in her underwear?

Johnny: excuse me

Jae: HAH

Ten: oohhh now johnnys gonna be jealous

Johnny: Shut it ten.

(Downloading picture)

Lucas: I get morning kisses too lmao

Yuta: are we sharing pics of her now bc ive got plenty.

Lucas: shes still my friend tho. Dont do that.

Ten: not like we all havent seen it before tbh

Jae: i mean i kinda wanna keep it that way. You can have her.

Taeyong: spoiler alert dumbass, we've all slept with Quinn too. You aint special. Shes literally at my place rn

Taeil: oh fuck is that what you've been doing?

Taeyong: lmaooo yeah. Working on a “project”

Taeil: thats what i kept hearing. Im leaving.

Taeyong: shes heading out now actually. Going back to her place. Jae ill tell her you said hi

Lucas: i guess johnnys not the only one whos jealous

Johnny: im not fuckin jealous. Im not even gonna snap her

Ten: uh huh

Yuta: yep sure

Taeil: yeah right

Lucas: well i gotta go eat pancakes and maybe eat something else later👅👅👅👅💦💦💦

Johnny: ew

Taeyong: thats probably why she'll ignore your ass lol

Ten: get that tongue in j-suh or else she wont ever text you back

#johnny smut #Johnny Fanfic #johnny suh #johnny seo #nct smut #nct fanfiction #nct fanfic #nct #johnny suh smut #johnny seo smut #johnny fanfiction

948 notes · View notes

joeybelle · 6 years

Text

Oh, how the tables have turned - Part 6

Inspired by @clyde-prompts: “Some guys are rude and use ableist slurs against Clyde. The reader is with them, and although she feels bad about what’s happening, is too scared to say anything in front of her “friends”. She comes back to the bar a couple nights later to try and show him she’s not a bad person. They get to know each other and fall in love”. Doesn’t fully follow the prompt.

Warnings: Language, first person POV, mentions of wasps and bug spray - lethal combo, IDK what I’m doing.

Word count: ~4700

Rating: Mature

Setting: Pre-heist

A.N: I kept delaying this part because I wanted to post it together with part 7 (since 5, 6 and 7 are meant to be one big chapter), but it isn’t finished yet and it might take a while until I finish it since Sunday is my only day off and that might be pretty busy too. Anyway I hope you guys enjoy it and sorry for the wait! Any feedback is more than welcome, and if you’re bored send me a message, I love talking to people. Just remember that I’m on European time and if I don’t reply right away I might be sleeping or at work.

Tags: @lonelyravenclaw @kyloren-supreme-ben @onmyknees4steve @elsablackswift @helloimindelaware @mwcritics @makingtimemine @littlekylo

Saturday came with an unexpected wave of heat and humidity that left me unable to move without sweating buckets. Still, I was thankful it wasn’t raining again, although by the way the air felt it would probably start raining soon. Since my house had no AC, I was a bit reluctant to have people over. Nothing I could do now, besides keeping cold drinks on hand and setting up the garden hose in case anyone needed some quick cooling down. (Me. It was definitely going to be me.)

Finding all the ingredients to make muffins from scratch had been a challenge, especially since it seemed that everyone and their mother chose to make something involving blueberries. After getting the ‘I’m sorry, we just sold the last one’ answer from all the local stores, I headed to the nearest supermarket, and then to the next one, where I had to battle a couple of old ladies to get my hands on some. I only won because I was faster, but by the look they gave me as I ran away with the blueberries, they were set on getting revenge. I would have to live in fear for the rest of my life.

Fortunately, when Jimmy’s car pulled into the driveway, I had everything ready. I was pretty sure I had enough ingredients to potentially feed a small village, but I was really excited by the prospect of baking. It had been a long time since I had a working kitchen and the time to cook (and also, someone to cook for), so I may have exaggerated a bit. I was planning to make blueberry muffins, chocolate chip, raspberry and white chocolate, and maybe banana if anyone wanted more. And sandwiches for lunch, something quick and filling that I could put together in minutes so I could help if they needed me. There was a chicken parmesan casserole already prepped in the fridge, ready to throw in the oven for a filling dinner later on. By the amount of materials piled in my garage, it wasn’t a job that would be finished in a few hours.

Sadie bolted out of the car with a huge grin on her face and attacked me right away. Jimmy looked reasonably awake, but Clyde looked like a total mess. I guessed he really wasn’t used to waking up this early, since I assumed he was pulling long hours at the bar. I felt bad for him, but not so bad that I wouldn’t smile at his sleepy face.

“I have coffee,” I said instead of good morning.

“Don’t worry about him,” Jimmy laughed, earning a sideways glance from his brother. “It just takes a while to wake the bear from hibernation.”

“Well, I’m sorry…”

“One,” Clyde interrupted me, and it took me a moment to understand what he was talking about, but the tiny smirk in the corner of his mouth clued me in.

“That’s playing dirty,” I said, crossing my arms. Technically I wasn’t apologizing to him, so it didn’t count. Did it?

“Still counts,” he mumbled as he passed me.

I shook my head and smiled. This was going to be a long day, and I would enjoy the hell out of it. “Anyone want breakfast?” I offered, but Jimmy shook his head.

“We’re good,” he said, pulling a ladder out of the back of his truck. “We better get started soon before it gets too hot.”

“Well, at least come and get some coffee. It’s cold brewed.”

“What’s that?” Jimmy asked, a confused look on his face.

“It’s a fancy type of iced coffee,” Clyde explained. “You put it in cold water and…”

“Why would you drink cold coffee,” Jimmy asked me, completely ignoring his brother who shut his mouth with a frown.

“It’s refreshing,” I said, shrugging. “It’s perfect for hot weather.”

He didn’t seem convinced. “Yeah, it’s just some of that sophisticated New York shit you brought with you, isn’t it?”

“Oh come on,” I laughed. “It’s not that fancy. It’s just imported Brazilian coffee that I ground yesterday especially for you guys. Coarse ground, steeped into cold spring water for a whole day. Perfect!”

“Wow,” was all Jimmy had to say, but I could see him stifling a laughter.

“Authentic Brazilian coffee and expensive vodka? You must be really high maintenance,” Clyde said, with a serious face.

“Yeah,” I said, winking. “As high maintenance as someone without a working AC unit, a leaking roof and a mostly unfurnished house can be.”

He smiled and I let Sadie drag me for a tour of the house. It wasn’t much to see, but she was really excited to find Clyde the Bear occupying half of my bed. To my embarrassment, I had to admit that I had gotten used to sleeping with the huge toy. It was a really good cuddle buddy and I had gotten into the habit of talking to it when I was feeling like the house was too empty. Yes, I was that pathetic.

Fortunately, Sadie was the only one to see it, and I was sure none of the adults would invade my bedroom without permission, so I would be spared the embarrassment. Unfortunately, my secret had been safe exactly one minute and twenty-five seconds, exactly how long it took Sadie to find her uncle and rat me out.

“What?” I replied to Clyde’s amused smile. “I’m basically five. I have no idea who let me be an adult.” If you have no plausible excuse, just run with it. Better than trying to deny it and fuel the teasing. “You lost a muffin for spilling my secret, little lady,” I said, pointing a finger at a laughing Sadie.

Clyde’s smile grew broader seeing that I wasn’t denying it, but it wasn’t a mocking smile. He was quite cute that Saturday morning, with his sleepy face and his messy hair that looked curlier than usually. There was still a tiny bit of his usual shyness, but it wasn’t as noticeable as before.

“Anything I can help you guys with?” I asked, when Jimmy returned from my garage with some more tools.

“Umm… no, not yet,” he said, scratching his head and looking at the roof. “We’ll call you if we need help.”

“Alright,” I said, turning to Sadie. “Do you wanna help me make muffins? I’m not sure I can do everything myself.”

She excitedly followed me to the kitchen. I had made some space the day before, moved the boxes to a corner of the living room, replaced the dining table with a smaller, foldable one I found in storage. Even with an energetic kid running around, there was less of a chance of any accidents happening. Or at least, I hoped. The memory of Clyde catching me in his arms was still pretty fresh in my mind.

To my surprise Sadie was really good at following directions and actually gave her best. I would have been able to make all the muffins in maybe a third of the time if I had done them at my own pace, but the point was to entertain her while her dad fixed my roof. I didn’t get to spend much time with kids while I lived in New York, since I’d been too busy surviving, but Sadie was such a good kid that I actually enjoyed it. She was quite talkative, telling me stories about her brothers, her mom and dad, about her school and about Clyde and Mellie, so by the time the first batch of muffins were in the oven, I felt like I had been part of the Logan family for ages.

Working in the kitchen ended up being a bit distracting, I found out pretty early on. After getting out all the necessary materials, they set up the ladder and Jimmy climbed into the attic, leaving Clyde on the ground to hand him things. Right in front of my kitchen window. I fought the urge to call my parents and curse them for designing the only entrance to our otherwise unused attic right in front of my window, so I’d be forced to watch Clyde Logan stretch as he handed tools to his brother, but I remembered that the house was built by my grandparents, and I’d need an Ouija board to contact them. But as time passed and my eyes kept darting to the man outside—whose t-shirt was juuust a bit too tight and his muscles just a bit too taut—I was actually considering Ouija-ing some carefully considered well-wishes to my ancestors. I did my best, however, to focus on something else.

If I were to be completely honest, if Sadie hadn’t been there to distract me from being too distracted by Clyde, I would have probably just pulled a chair in front of the counter, poured myself a perfectly brewed cup of iced coffee and indulged into staring out the window. I mean, that’s how a considerable amount of porn movies started: a hot dude fixing something, a horny woman leering at him and the rough sex that follows, I thought, absentmindedly fanning myself with a napkin, and it wasn’t because of the constantly increasing temperature in my kitchen.

“Do you like uncle Clyde?” Sadie asked, making me snap out of my thoughts.

“Yeah, don’t you?” I tried deflecting the question, turning around and opening the fridge. The cool air coming out of it was a blessing. I really needed to get some air conditioning installed as soon as possible.

“Yeah, but that’s not what I asked,” she giggled.

Of course not. “What did you ask, then?” Play dumb until they get bored, I thought to myself, however I had forgotten just how persistent kids could be.

“If you like like him,” she said in a serious tone.

“How do you like like someone?” Keep playing dumb.

“Oh you know,” she giggled once again and hopped of the chair coming next to me and the still open fridge. “You wanna go with them on dates, and hold hands, and kiss… and make babies and then get married and live happily ever after.”

Well, that escalated quickly. “In that order?” I asked, getting two sodas from the fridge and finally closing it, just as it started hysterically beeping at me.

Sadie shrugged as she took the can I handed her. “So do you like him?” she continued, making me almost choke on my drink.

“What makes you ask that?” I tried further deflecting the question, because kids should never be trusted with sensitive information, certainly not one as talkative as Sadie.

“You keep staring at him,” she laughed and I cursed myself for being caught red-handed.

“I don’t stare at him,” I lied, but I was sure it wasn’t very convincing. “I was just looking out the window, that’s all.” Sadie kept smiling and I shook my head. In the end it’s not like it was that big of a secret that I liked him. After all, he knew and he was the only one that mattered. But I didn’t really want her blurting it out in public and making it more awkward than it already was. “Okay, maybe,” I said, giving her a serious look. “But that’s gonna be our secret. If you tell anyone I’m gonna find out where you live, hide under your bed and tickle you right as you’re falling asleep,” I threatened, approaching her while wiggling my fingers in a pretty menacing way. “Promise?”

“Promise!” she giggled, trying to hide from my tickle attack.

“Okay, great! Do you want a sandwich?” I changed the subject. I was starting to think that

The Logans would age me prematurely. Not that I needed any help in that department.

I showed Sadie how to make some icing, just to keep her busy while I put together some sandwiches. She wanted a turkey ham one, with extra mayo and crusts cut off and I made it exactly as she wanted it. Cut it into quarters to make it easier to eat, but Sadie was really taking her whisking job seriously, so I resorted to feeding the pieces to her over the bowl.

I glimpsed out the window to see an amused Clyde watching me feed his niece, a big piece of my own sandwich sticking— pretty comically I assumed— out of my mouth, his hands full with what looked like some old wood. I shoved another piece of sandwich into Sadie’s mouth, swallowed what remained of mine and went to open the window. The boys had been working for quite some time, so I assumed they’d be hungry already. I knew I was, and the only thing I had done all morning was watch a kid paint my kitchen in muffin batter.

“Would you like to take a break? Grab something quick to eat?” I asked, leaning onto the counter, and trying to get my head out the window. He didn’t seem opposed to the idea, and after throwing the old wood in a pile of garbage, he climbed up the ladder to talk to his brother.

“Jimmy said he’s not hungry yet. Maybe later.”

“Are you hungry?” I pressed, because he really looked like he had skipped breakfast. While the cup of coffee I had given him earlier seemed to have woken him up, he still looked a little sluggish.

“A bit,” he shrugged.

“Ok, I’ll make you a sandwich and you can eat it while working,” I said and he nodded. “What would you like?”

“Anything is fine.”

I quickly put some things together, making something that was definitely not instagram ready, but it was pretty filling and I knew it would taste pretty good. Placed it on a plate and pushed it towards the open window.

Clyde had come down from the ladder, a new layer of dust and debris covering him. He had specks of dust caught in his hair and a dark smudge on his nose, like he had tried scratching it with dirty hands. He had to at least take a break and wash his hands, but Jimmy called him from the attic, needing something else. It seemed he wouldn’t be having a moment to spare.

I sighed and pulled back the sandwich, cut it into small wedges like I did with Sadie’s and grabbed a piece.

“Clyde, come here,” I called, extending my arm through the open window, once he was back on the ground. He looked at the dirt covering his hands and then at the piece of sandwich in mine. “Bite,” I said motioning to the food. He looked at it a little confused, but then smiled and came closer. He bent down to my level and took a tentative bite. “Put more strength into it, Logan,” I laughed.

I didn’t even try to keep a straight face, because a grown man, built like a brick shithouse eating out of my hand was both comical and surprisingly enticing. He was also laughing and I hoped he wouldn’t choke on the food, because I was sure I wouldn't be able to pull the Heimlich maneuver on him. He took another quick bite as Jimmy called his name again and his lips briefly brushed my fingers. I could feel the blood rush to my cheeks, and I returned to the kitchen.

“Don’t laugh at us, young lady,” I said, pointing at Sadie with what was left of the sandwich, “we’re Adults.”

I had to quickly check on the muffins in the oven. They were done so I took them out, placed them on the cooling rack and shoved another batch in. By the time I was done, Clyde had returned and was hovering near the window. I hopped onto the counter to be able to reach better. I gestured for him to stick his head inside as I took another piece of sandwich and brought it to his lips. He was a little too enthusiastic taking a bite and accidentally nipped my finger.

“My fingers aren’t part of the meal, Logan,” I laughed, while Sadie climbed onto a chair next to me.

“Sorry,” he mumbled, and I could see a blush creeping up his cheeks.

“One!” I grinned, because now I wasn’t at a disadvantage anymore.

I took another piece of sandwich and shoved it into Sadie’s giggling mouth. By now I was sure that both of them could feed themselves, but it was just too funny to stop and both of them seemed to enjoy it.

“I’m your bird mama now,” I proudly announced, placing the last bits of food into the open and waiting mouths of my newly adopted baby birds.

A loud shriek coming from above made me jump off the counter, knocking over a glass that shattered on the floor. Clyde scrambled to remove himself from the window without breaking anything, and hurried to climb up the ladder only to be almost knocked down by a panicked Jimmy.

“What the fuck?” I breathed, completely forgetting that there was a child with me and I should have been watching my language. I grabbed Sadie and carried her over the shattered glass, hurrying to get out the door and see what was going on.

“Do you have bees or wasps in your attic?” she asked, and seemed a lot calmer than me.

“Maybe?” It was possible, I couldn’t deny it. “Is he allergic to them?” I asked, feeling a cold shiver run down my spine.

“No,” she giggled, and somehow that didn’t do anything to calm me down. “Just scared.”

I dropped the girl down on the grass and ran towards her father. Jimmy looked a little pale and his breathing was laboured, but didn’t look injured.

“What happened?” I asked.

“He got scared of some wasps, that’s what happened,” Clyde explained with a frown on his face, but I couldn’t tell if his tone was judgemental or not.

“I’m so sorry,” I said, placing a hand on Jimmy’s shoulder. “I had a team come over right after I moved here and they said they took care of any rodents or insects. They told me I had some wasps in the attic, but that they sprayed everywhere and removed the nests and that it shouldn't be a problem anymore. It’s my fault, I should have checked beforehand.” Now I realized just how stupid and unprepared I was. What if he was allergic and he had gotten stung. I didn’t really want to imagine what would have happened.

“No, no! It’s not your fault. I know there are wasps in attics, and I checked before starting work, but these… these just came out of nowhere and I panicked.”

“I’m so sorry, Jimmy,” I apologized again.

“He just needs a cold beer and he’ll be fine,” Sadie said, showing up out of nowhere with a beer bottle in her hand. She seemed really used to this situation, so it might have been a somewhat common occurrence.

“Thanks, Sadie-bug,” Jimmy said, taking the bottle from her hand.

“Hey, you shouldn’t go into the kitchen,” I said, frowning at her, suddenly remembering the broken glass. “There’s glass everywhere.”

“It’s okay, I jumped over it,” she smiled, incredibly proud of herself, completely ignoring the fact that she could have slipped and landed in the pile of shards. Yep, the Logans would be the death of me. I sighed.

“Well, y’all wait here while I go clean up and fetch the bug spray.”

“I’ll help,” Clyde offered, and I didn’t stop him.

As the day was getting hotter, so was my kitchen. With the oven running for so long, it was almost too much. I could feel beads of sweat starting to form on my forehead. Clyde seemed to be taking it even worse than me, but I almost expected it, with his fair skin and all. I considered opening another window, but at this point I knew it wouldn’t make any difference, since it seemed to be just as hot outside too. We’d have to suffer.

Clyde started sweeping the floor while I took the muffins out of the oven. Due to the whole commotion I had forgotten I had some in, but luckily I saw them in time, before they turned into a pile of charcoal. Sadie would have been sad. I kept glancing at Clyde as I moved around the kitchen. His t-shirt was quickly getting soaked, and I couldn’t stop looking at how it stuck to his broad back. Get a hold of yourself, you foul woman, I scolded myself and I started looking for the bug spray.

“Three,” he said as he caught me stealing another glance.

“What? No! Nope. It wasn’t said to you, it doesn’t count.”

“It does count.”

“No it doesn’t,” I said, pointing a finger at his nose. “Plus it was something I had to apologize for. Someone nearly died attacked by wasps.” I didn’t know why I was resisting, after all I just had to buy him a couple of drinks, and to be honest I wasn’t opposed to spending more time with him. I just didn’t want to lose at this stupid game we were playing.

“Well that’s why you have one apology a day,” he said in a serious manner. “Don’t waste it.”

“It wasn’t meant for you so it doesn’t count,” I insisted. “Unless you wanna follow me around to see just how many times I apologize to other people, you won’t be able to know for sure. And come on, don’t make it too easy,” I said, winking at him.

He stopped sweeping and looked at me for a few moments. “Alright,” he said, resigned, “it’s still one, then.”

I grinned and went back to looking for the can of spray. I found it by the time the floor was cleaned and both of us drenched in sweat. With the oven turned off and the window open, I was hoping it would eventually cool down, but there was no sign of that happening anytime soon.

I grabbed the can and went outside, Clyde following me closely. It was some type of industrial grade bug spray I had brought with me from New York. There’s nothing better than New York to teach you how to deal with a bug problem. I knew for a fact that it worked on wasps too, because I manually sprayed some before I called a team of professionals to deal with them.

That being said, I wasn't overly thrilled by the prospect of going into the attic to battle god knows how many angry wasps, but I had no choice.

“I can go up there,” Clyde offered, but I could see he wasn’t thrilled either.

“Nah, you’re too tall to fit in there,” I said. The attic was nothing more than a cramped space between the roof and the ceiling, it wasn’t big enough for Clyde to stand properly.

“But…” he objected.

“My house, my rules,” I cut him off and started climbing the ladder.

The only upside of this whole situation was that Clyde was getting a great view of my ass, as he held onto the ladder to stabilize it. I really hoped he was enjoying the view, because soon I’d probably come back down stung by wasps and doused in bug spray, which I suspected wasn’t such a great look on me. I climbed inside the attic and glanced down. By the light blush on his cheeks and his averted gaze I was pretty sure he’s enjoyed the view. Of course, it could have just been the heart, but it could also have been my ass.

I didn’t step inside as full of courage as I wanted, but at least there was no one up there to watch me cowardly look around for the stingers. The space was incredibly hot and full of dust and my throat and lungs didn’t like it one bit, but I kept as silent as I could so I would hear the wasps. Luckily, there was a big hole in the roof where Jimmy had started taking off the tiles, so there was more than enough light.

I found the culprits after a few minutes of searching. They were trying to build a new nest next to a beam, and I ruthlessly sprayed them before they could attack me. I felt sorry for them, but this was my house and they should have found a better place to invade. I took down the half built nest, as the exterminator had told me to do, and sprayed the spot where it had been attached.

I left the can next to Jimmy’s tools before climbing down. In case anything like this happened again, at least he had a weapon.

“All done,” I said, hopping down the ladder. I was greeted with some enthusiastic cheers. “How about we take that break now? I think the muffins have cooled down by now and they’re awaiting to be tasted.” More enthusiastic cheers. “I think I’ll bring the food outside, it’s a bit too hot and stuffy in the house. Sadie, wanna help me? There’s the hose, you can wash up if you want, or you can use the bathroom inside.”

I placed the food on paper plates and Sadie carried them outside one by one, hopefully without dropping anything on the ground. We placed a big blanket on the grass, because bringing out the table and chairs would be too much work and everyone decided it just wasn’t worth it. Sadie said it felt like a picnic and we just went along with that.

I came out with cold drinks and nearly dropped the bottles when I rounded the corner, because a shirtless Clyde dousing himself with the garden hose was really something I wasn’t expecting to see. The whole porn idea flashed through my brain again and I almost turned around and went back to the house but that would have been a bit too obvious, especially since Clyde turned his head and looked at me. I averted my gaze and hurried to the blanket.

Jimmy was grinning and I wanted to strangle him.

“Whatever’s behind that grin, I don’t wanna hear it,” I warned him and placed the bottles on the blanket, plopping next to him.

“I ain’t saying nothing!” He lifted his arms in a defensive gesture and opened a beer bottle, but the grin still plastered on his face scared me. So that wasn’t very reassuring.

“Well I can almost hear you thinking it.” I didn’t know what ‘It’ was, but I was scared.

“I don’t have to say anything, your blush speaks for itself,” he said, grabbing a sandwich, and I wanted to shove it down his throat whole so I’d be sure he’d keep his mouth shut, but Sadie reappeared from somewhere around the bushes and I knew better than to allow myself to be violent in front of a kid. For now at least.

However, he kept his word and didn’t say a thing while we ate, but he did snicker when Clyde joined us. He wasn’t shirtless anymore, thank heavens, because if he were I’d probably spontaneously combust, but his t-shirt was wet and stuck to his chest in all the right places and... okay, this wasn’t that much better. I did my best to focus on anything else for the remainder of the meal.

The food— and especially the muffins— had been very well received by the Logans and it made me really happy. It felt nice being appreciated and also it felt nice to be able to do something for the people who were giving up their free time to help me out. I was really lucky that someone cared enough for me to do that.

But I think what made me the happiest was Clyde’s confession that he hadn’t eaten muffins so tasty since the ones his mother used to make. It was sad that since she passed no one made them muffins anymore, so I promised I’d bake more for them if they agreed to build me another mailbox. With hand painted butterflies and all. Jimmy almost choked laughing and recounted the story in more (embarrassing) detail than Clyde had and by the time we finished eating, my jaws were hurting from laughing so hard.

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lonelypond · 6 years

Text

Casual Lunacy, Ch. 52

Love Live, NicoMaki, 5k, 52/?

Summary: We meet some new people and Nico finally escapes her co-stars.

AfterShocks, Part 2

The door opened; Hanayo looked up. She’d gotten bored looking at the utilitarian walls, completely surreal after being in the middle of a reality that was cracking open and trying to grab her. But Hanayo needed a distraction so she didn’t just dwell on how Rin looked as Maki dragged her off, both werewolves burned and bleeding. So here it was, two new problems to deal with: a dark skinned woman, tan hair in an Afro, soft grey suit, followed by another woman, black hair in a severe bun, black pinstripe suit that seemed more suited to a Wall Street office than a police station. The first smiled, and her British accent made the the entire evening even more unreal, “Good evening, Ms. Koizumi. I’m Special Agent Davies and this is my partner, Marshal Tam.”

Hanayo tensed, she’d asked for her phone call, planning to call the Nishikinos, but received no response. And now, these two, obviously not Northwestern police officers apppeared.

“We have a few questions about your evening.” Agent Davies pulled out a chair on the opposite side of the table. Marshal Tam stood at ease by the door, one thumb casually hooked in her vest pocket, an odd gesture for someone so permanent pressed. “We’ve already reviewed the information you’ve given the FCC.” Davies smiled, “That’s actually the reason why we’re here now.”

Tam quirked an eyebrow, “This is when you might want to mention how very classified all this is.”

“Oh right. Silly me,” Davies’ grin got broader, “The Marshal is what you Americans call the ‘bad cop.”” A cough, “EVERYTHING you’ve discovered since you started working with” a quick glance at the file, “Kira, Todo, and Yuki is so top secret Netflix writers wish there were conspiracy theories about it they could steal.”

“Your analogies are fascinating, Mel.” Tam drawled.

“Should I have said Dr. Who?” Davies half turned.

“Always timely.” A flicked finger salute.

“Excuse me. Can I have my phone call now.” Hanayo was tired and sore and not in an indulgent mood. Wasn’t she on the right side of this?

“No.” Two voices, too quickly.

“You have very few rights here.” Tam stated.

“I was trying to stop them.” Hanayo couldn’t believe this.

Davies’ tone was almost sympathetic, “There is an unprecedented and pretty complete cockup here and you are right in the center. Whatever your initial intentions, you are now part of the problem.”

Hanayo lost her last shred of lingering optimism as she looked up into Tam’s unemotional, dark eyes and wondered how long this night was going to be.

####################################

The door opened in the small, mirrored room; Anju stared, wondering who was coming through. Erena, tall, hands in the pockets of her borrowed NU Police sweatshirt.

“Hey.” Erena waved, dark hair falling forward as she stooped a little. “Did they feed you? Mind if I sit?”

“Yeah…” Anju pushed her chair a little out from the wall, “Go ahead.”

Erena pulled a chair out from the table, “Did you tell them what happened?”

Anju crossed her arms over her chest, “I didn’t make any sense.” Her mouth tightened, “But it just seemed like I was confirming things for them. They didn’t pressure me.” She stared straight at Erena, eyes cloudy, “I think they actually believed me.”

Erena shrugged, “After the rest of this night, I believe you too.”

“Believe what?”

Erena considered, steepling her fingers together, trying to find appropriate words, “That you’re the woman I wanted to get to know, but not the woman I’ve been working with since Halloween.”

“What about the…”

“Magic?” Erena rubbed the bridge of her nose, “I have a feeling THEY will be telling us more about that.”

“Why?”

“Haven’t talked to any actual police; aren’t allowed to call a lawyer. We are obviously an above people’s paygrade problem.”

Anju scooted her chair a little closer to the table, “Then why did you talk to them?”

Erena leaned back, scuffed boots crossed at the ankles. “This is way outside of what I ever intended to do. Those weren’t special effects.” She raised a leg, pointing above her knee, where a rip was scorched in her black jeans, “Every substance had heat and weight and properties. Maybe we broke something.” Legs back to stretched out, eyes staring at the ceiling. “If we did, they might know how to fix it.”

#############################################

It wasn’t exactly frantic pounding, Dr. Nishikino thought as her very solid front door shuddered, more like very determined. She’d changed into comfortable clothes, not intending to sleep until they’d managed to get Hanayo out of police custody. Both werewolves were cleaning up, Maki in the master bath, Rin in the largest guest room. As she headed for the door, Dr. Nishikino heard a howl, then a thump. She opened the door, Nico stepped inside, said “Where’s Maki?” and got tackled by a soaking wet wolf, snuffling all over Nico’s body. Nico fell with a grunt, but immediately wrapped her arms around Maki, hugging the werewolf so tightly Maki whined a little. Dr. Nishikino stepped around to close the door and went back to the kitchen, where she was making a pot of coffee and warming cookies.

“What happened to you, pretty girl?” Nico let tender fingers lightly trail over the burned fur surrounding Maki’s mouth.

Maki responded with growling, whimpering, and a triumphant howl, which Rin echoed from upstairs, sounding weaker than usual.

“So the bad guys didn’t win. Good.” Nico hugged tighter.

Maki howled proudly.

Nico lying on the floor, arms around the werewolf on top of her, chuckled, as Maki’s amethyst eyes glowed at her. “Yes, Nico is very impressed. Nico will be even more impressed when Maki TALKS and tells her the whole story.”

“Kayo-chin’s stoooopid boss ripped apart everything, burned Maki, stabbed me, made Kayo-chin disappear, cloned herself, then got dragged down a hole by a pit monster.” Rin appeared at the top of the stairs, towelling off her hair, dressed in a pair of sweats and a long sleeve t-shirt. They fit so she must keep clothes here too, Nico realized. Nico also realized that proximity to werewolf fresh out of the bath had soaked through her coat to her clothes.

“Nico needs to change.” Nico let Maki go, sitting up. Maki sprinted eagerly up the stairs, turning at the halfway point to stick her tongue out at Nico.

Rin hipchecked her bff, “Don’t forget about Kayo-chin.”

Maki snorted.

Nico laughed. Cute werewolves being safe and silly was exactly what she needed right now.

#######################################

Casey Alvarez sighed, glancing at her phone again. Tsubasa was waiting. Everyone else had gone off to change or finish shutting things down for the evening, but Tsubasa had lingered.

“Nico’s not pressing charges, but there are a couple of people who want to talk to you tonight.” Alvarez’s expression was wry, “Things always go better if you walk in voluntarily.”

Tsubasa grunted, “Is that your professional, off duty cop, friend of Nico advice?”

“Nope.” Alvarez hardened her stance and her voice, “That would have been don’t rig dangerous traps in set pieces your co workers have to use.”

“Yeah.” Tsubasa kicked at something. “That’s a point.”

“I don’t know exactly what’s happening” Alvarez rubbed her temples, “Which I always hate. But I talked to somebody at the FCC who talked to somebody somewhere I can’t even know the name of who just texted me that I should escort you to the Campus Police, if you’re still here…”

Tsubasa sniggered, ignoring the opening Alvarez might have left her. “Am I getting shipped to Roswell?”

“I wouldn’t know.” Alvarez’s voice was flat.

“Can I file a missing persons report on myself in advance?” Tsubasa’s voice was taunting, her green eyes sparkling at Alvarez.

“Whatever, chica.” Alvarez’s easy dismissal of her tease just amused Tsubasa. “Your friends are there.”

“Yeah.” Tsubasa picked up her coat, “Do you have to cuff me?”

“Nope. Just have to walk my wife to our car, if you don’t mind.”

“Nope.” Tsubasa wrapped a scarf around her neck, “Let’s get this over with.”

##########################################

Davies pushed the transcript toward Hanayo. “So you’re certain it was a different Anju?

“Yes.”

“And the werewolves can confirm this?”

The question was dropped in so casually Hanayo was almost caught, but the habit of more than half a lifetime kept Rin’s secret safe.

Davies leaned forward, “We know about your fiancée. And the Nishikino girl.”

Hanayo remained silent.

“Our branch of the Marshals has been tracking werewolf family lines for centuries.” Tam added, “Like every other American citizen, they have rights, and we can only intervene if they break the law or present a deadly threat.”

Hanayo shrugged with disinterest, picked up a pen and started reading through her typed statement.

“The best way to protect her is from the inside.” Tam continued.

Hanayo frowned, upper lip hinting scowl, “What do you mean?”

Tam answered bluntly, “You’ve been very impressive, picking up the science so rapidly.”

Davies chuckled, “And you can obviously keep a secret.”

“And you seem to have a good working relationship with…”

“That’s not true,” Now Hanayo could start to let some of the anxiety fuel anger. They obviously wanted something from her.

“Whether or not there was friction, the four of you were effective. You basically created and survived your own boot camp. We need women like you in the program.”

“What program?” . “Think of this as a job interview.” The Agent and the Marshall had dropped the topic of werewolves; Hanayo wouldn’t be bringing it up.

###############################################

Nico had been shoved into Maki’s room by the very insistent werewolf. Maki dripping on her tights, Nico pulled out a few things to change into, then started undressing. Before she could even get out of her skirt, Maki was there, naked, skin cold and damp, with very very human hands, ignoring the usual progression of zippers and other fasteners to rip through fabric to get to Nico. Active as she was, Maki was still chilled and trembling, so Nico guided them both to the bed, raising Maki’s blanket over their shoulders. Once there was a warming cocoon, Nico grabbed one of Maki’s hands.

“Slow down, pretty girl. Nico wants to know what happened.” Nico could see healing cuts, scrapes, and burns all over Maki. What had the werewolf gotten into, a firefight? Were there bullet wounds or something? What exactly had Rin said? Hanayo’s bosses. As the impatient redhead whimpered, Nico ran her hands over Maki’s skin, feeling for open wounds. “Who did this?”

Maki shook her head, pushing into Nico’s shoulder, whining plaintively. Nico wondered if something had happened to Maki’s voice. A growling kiss disrupted her thoughts.

Nico responded, but then she wrapped both arms around Maki again and dropped them both back to the bed, “Maki, what happened? Who did all this? Nozomi said Erena..”

A huge inhale by Maki and Nico’s mouth was full of wet, red hair with metallic smoke taste as Maki flopped into her girlfriend’s side. Her arrival must have interrupted Maki before shampooing, Nico guessed. Now to get some kind of verbal response before Maki stressed back into wolf form.

“Were you in a fire?” Nico wondered.

Whine. Nope not fire.

“Help Nico out here, pretty girl.” Knowing how sensitive Maki was to moods, Nico took care to just enjoy the feel of being close to Maki, not letting worry or impatience interfere with the tactile pleasures of warm, cozy lover. “Talk to me.”

Maki just snuggled closer. Nico could feel her warming up, which was good. A knock on the door; no response from Maki, so Nico answered, “Come in.”

Maki’s mother stuck her head in, staring at her daughter for a moment, then meeting Nico’s glance, “Maki’s father is here so we’re going to take Rin to the police station and meet with the lawyer. She hasn’t been able to talk to Hanayo yet, but is going through some kind of Non Disclosure Agreement before Hanayo signs it.”

Maki whiffled, moving even closer to Nico, who could feel the fur against her torso as Maki shifted, changing. Then Maki howled a chiding series of notes at her mother.

Nico glanced down at the russet and cream head now blowing warm, drooling breaths across her chin and wondered how much of a crisis just asking Dr. Nishikino what was going on would cause.

“Ummmm…” it didn’t help if Nico ouldn’t figure out the right question.The shaggy foreleg angled across her diaphragm had her trapped under the covers, which was fine, because Nico needed more clothes before being seen by anybody not Maki.

“Maki was frantic when she arrived, and her wounds were pretty bad.” Dr. Nishikino volunteered information as Nico struggled to phrase a question, “Serious healing takes up a lot of energy. My daughter is much less verbal when she’s exhausted.”

Maki howled at her mother, an annoyed note.

“Sorry. Maki communicates quite clearly, but when tired she tends not to use words.” Dr. Nishikino sounded amused, “Does that answer meet with your approval?”

Maki’s more agreeable howl was quieter than the others had been. Nico could feel the werewolf starting to relax, her breaths slowing. “I’ll take care of things here.” Nico whispered, not wanting to stir up Maki.

A wry smile crossed Dr. Nishikino’s face. Maki had made it quite clear who she intended to be comforted by, “Raid the refrigerator for anything you want, Nico. I hear you had a crazy night yourself.”

Nico was stroking gently Maki’s fur, cheek resting against Maki’s head, only half paying attention to the conversation, “Nico will turn into a great story sometime.”

“I look forward to hearing it. I’ll text you when we know more about Hanayo.” Dr. Nishikino closed the door.

“Thanks.”

####################################

Hanayo was standing, wanting her phone, knowing Rin was there with Maki’s Dad but not able to see her yet. The Nishikinos had gotten in touch with Abril Cohen, a lawyer who actually had the clearances required to negotiate with Agent Davies and Marshall Tam so Hanayo had opted to take a brief break from legal speak as some details were worked out based on the list she’d given Cohen.

The door opened and Erena and the other Anju walked in, Erena striding confidently up to Hanayo, Anju more tentative.

“Koizumi.” Erena extended her hand. Hanayo’s dubious expression didn’t discourage Erena, who refused to pull back, “Look, I’m sorry this happened, Koizumi. I had no idea what she was planning. It was supposed to be data collection. I should have recognized that everything was getting out of control.”

“Tsubasa.” Hanayo nearly spat. Anju glanced confused from one to the other.

Erena raised both her hands in a sign of surrender, “The werewolf hunt thing was completely on her. I say live and let live and I told her that.”

Anju sat down, remembering the evening’s scenes, the two what she thought were dogs, were they werewolves?!?!?...what else was actually real in this world. Erena immediately noticed her discomfort and put a gentle hand on her shoulder. “Anju?”

“What’s her deal anyway?” Hanayo knew it was a different woman, but it was hard not to seethe with resentment.

“The other Anju put her in some kind of suspended animation during Pumpkin Prom. I guess she had the ability to make herself look our age and hypnotized Anju into telling her enough details for a start. Magical identity theft.” Erena’s voice warmed with an atypical flare of annoyance. “After that was when we stopped talking about how to measure paranormal activity theoretically and began to build tools.” Erena squeezed Anju’s shoulder, “I’d started designing a few after our Ghostbusters conversation.

Anju smiled, “I started designing better hazard suits. With a little style.”

Watching them flirt, a frowning Hanayo became decisive. “I want to see Rin.” She said as if convincing herself, moving to the door and banging. After several minutes, Marshall Tam stepped in.

“I want to see Rin.” Hanayo repeated.

“You’ll have to wait…” Tam started.

Hanayo’s eyes were feverish and she left barely any space for comprehension between her rushed words. “Bring Rin in here now or you can fight Maki’s lawyer after you put me in whatever deep pit you want because if I don’t see Rin in two minutes, I am never ever helping you.”

There was a staring match. Anju and Erena watched curiously, Erena surprised by a Hanayo she thought mild’s fight. Tam turned on her heel without a word. Hanayo kept an eye on the clock and then 97 seconds after Tam left, Rin bounded in, grabbing Hanayo in a hug that lifted her off the floor. “Kayo-chin!”

Mel Davies frowned at her partner as they stood outside the door listening to Rin shout happily. Three years together dealing with Quantum Extra Consciousness hotspots all over the world had not endeared her to Tam’s not rare enough flashes of eccentricity.

Davies cleared her throat, “So you’re going to play this one by something other than the established protocols?”

Tam shrugged, “In love with a werewolf or a dryad or a …” A wink, “We’ve all been there.”

Davies paced. This whole situation was going to rewrite the manual, which would probably be her next tiresome task, “You have never been funny.”

“I have never tried.” Tam leaned against the wall, watching Davies fidget.

“You realize we’re probably going to get a werewolf added to this bloody team.” Davies recognized that smile. It was Tam’s “I’ve won at chess” smile.

“Oops.” said the Cheshire Marshal.

#######################################

Umi and Honoka exchanged a glance. Kotori was in their walk in closet, removing clothes from hangers and either tossing them in a pile or putting them on a different hanger and then moving them to another part of the closet.

Umi spoke first, “Kotori? Can we assist you in any way.”

Kotori shook her head, ducking it, and making a small, unhappy noise. Two sets of eyebrows shot up, this was serious. Honoka made broad gestures, encouraging Umi to follow her out of their bedroom. Umi finally nodded agreement, but touched Kotori’s shoulder before leaving, “We will return shortly.”

Kotori ‘dropped’ a hanger on the floor, nearly knicking Umi’s toes. Umi skipped back, not taking her eyes off Kotori until she had to negotiate the stairs because Honoka had started dragging her down them.

“Umi Umi Umi, what are we going to do? Kotori’s so mad…”

Umi was puzzled. “But who is she mad at? I got her favorite cheesecake after you texted me. Did you do something”

“Umi…” Honoka winced and Umi felt a little guilty for her doubt.

And then Honoka went into a blaze of motion, orange hair flopping over her bright blue eyes as she shook her hands in front of her, “It was so crazy, Umi. Nico got locked in a coffin, half the cast got dragged into a room with Nico’s cute cop friend, and Kashima and Eli and Deidre and Ami didn’t get out of costume until like 15 minutes ago. And I think Kashima tore off some buttons. And Anju never showed up. And Erena left and…”

Umi grabbed Honoka’s hands, holding them tightly until her extremely excitable girlfriend slowed to silence.

“Who is Kotori upset at?” Umi needed specifics, not a flood of speculation.

Honoka eyebrows furrowed as she tried to work it out, “Mostly Anju I think. I tried to help, but there’s a lot of work.” Honoka flopped on the couch, “You actually have to know where everything goes.”

Umi sighed, “That is to be expected. There are more than thirty people in the cast and most have multiple costume changes. Poor Kotori.” Umi glanced upstairs.

“I think the director fired people.” Honoka scratched her head, “Maybe. Or they were getting arrested. Or Nico was hitting them.”

“What?” Umi’s attention immediately shifted back to Honoka.

“Well, Nico hit Kashima. But it wasn’t a big deal.” Honoka paused again. “But Officer...Alvarez was talking with a real serious face to Professor Asuka and walking one of the stagehands out, Tsubasa, I think.”

That would make sense, Umi realized. Maki’s friends had been worried about Tsubasa’s interest in Nico.

“How can we help Kotori?” Umi sat next to Honoka, hands clasped.

Honoka thought for a moment. “Hang costumes tomorrow if Anju doesn’t show. Too many actors leave ‘em lying around.”

“Perfect.” Umi grasped Honoka’s closest hand, raised it to her lips, and kissed it softly, “We will assist Kotori by taking over the more onerous tasks.” Umi considered. “Or I will.”

“What about me? I can help.” Honoka chirped, happy Umi agreed with her idea.

“We will ask the Professor if there is a job more suited to your talents.”

“Ooh, good idea.” Honoka mimicked a hand over hand action, “I could open the curtains.”

“I believe that’s automated, Honoka.”

“Oh…” Disappointed, Honoka dropped her head on Umi’s shoulder, “What do we do now?”

“Wait until Kotori wants her cheesecake.”

“Yeah.”

###################################

Rin was back to fidgeting with the Doctors Nishikino in the hall; Hanayo was leaning forward at the table, watching intently; Erena was relaxed, leaning back; Anju was slumping in her chair, exhausted; Abril Cohen was ticking off points with a pen, with Marshal Tam opposite her and Agent Davies observing from a corner seat.

“So this is where we are: you, an intergovernmental task force, are going to sponsor these three plus Tsubasa Kira…”

“I am not signing anything or going anywhere without Rin.” Hanayo insisted stubbornly.

“There isn’t a provision for that.” Tam said simply.

“If I’m a government employee and get transferred, can I take my wife?” Hanayo pressed.

Davies glanced at Tam, who made a grimace, “You don’t have a wife.”

“I will.” Hanayo crossed her arms.

“We could send you to prison. Or just walk you out of here handcuffed between us, Ms. Koizumi.” Davies pointed out.

“For helping you find out about this?” Hanayo’s voice was shrill, but with outrage not fear.

“Yes.” Tam snarled.

Hanayo paled, but didn’t waver, “Rin comes with me. If you want us to recreate what they…” Hanayo glared at Erena and Anju, “were doing and restart the Princeton Engineering Anomalies program…” here Hanayo hesitated, still wary about sharing Rin’s secret, “werewolf senses will help.”

Erena shifted, “She’s probably right. I wonder what all that felt like for…” Erena hesitated, wondering if the room also knew about the redhead, “Hanayo’s fiancée. It would be a useful perspective.”

Although Anju was still wary of Hanayo, she decided to join the consensus, “Koizumi’s fiancée is probably more useful than I am right now.” That admission surprised Hanayo and Erena leaned forward in support as Anju continued to speak, “I understand I’m the only link to this other…”

“Pocket of Quantum Extra Consciousness…” Davies offered.

“You really need a better vocabulary for this.” Erena

Davies and Tam shared a look, then the Marshal spoke. “We don’t disagree.”

“It’ll be part of your job.” Davies stated, then muttered, “if I have any say.”

Anju repeated her statement when the room went quiet, “I understand I’m the only link, but I don’t have any of her practical knowledge.”

“But you can learn.” Erena’s response was quick.

“And…” Anju’s head fell, and she shivered a little, “I want to, so I can...so I can...understand what she did to me. And the werewolf could accelerate our discovery process.”

Davies had her phone out and was typing quickly, “What about Tsubasa? There was a lot of mutual animosity mentioned by both parties during their interviews.”

“Take her out in handcuffs.” Hanayo mumbled. Tam almost let herself seem amused, Davies’ nod was a confirmation of her point.

“I’ll talk to her.” Erena turned to Hanayo, “She’s not really a terrible person.”

“Hmmmpphhh…” Hanayo began to smolder, fingers tapping an angry rhythm. Abril Cohen decided to intervene.

“So my client is not committing to anything unless you agree to also transfer her wife to Princeton University, with status equal to the other parties to this arrangement. Is that correct, Hanayo?”

Hanayo nodded, maintaining eye contact with Tam.

“Do you want me to talk to Tsubasa?” Davies slid her phone into her pocket.

“Yes.” Tam answered, standing, “Come with me, Koizumi, and see if your future wife agrees to this.”

#################################

This was not one of Tsubasa’s better nights. When Nico’s girlfriend had landed on top of her, snarling, starting to shift like the characters in Ginger Snaps, Tsubasa had a new, visceral understanding of fear. But then the werewolf had stopped, more concerned with saving Nico than eviscerating Tsubasa. Which was unexpected and confusing and did ABSOLUTELY nothing to cut the complete terror at the thought of being that close to the woman again. Tsubasa fell into a chair, head in her hands, trying to remember how all of this had started. Too many late nights, too many energy drinks, too much Lovecraft, too much imagination, and then the tantalizing thought of knowing things no one else did. But that had all fled with the weight of claws against her throat and very human rage in unnatural green eyes. And with Nico locked in a coffin…

Door banged open, Agent Davies walked in, brows lowered over tiger’s eye irises. “Hello again, Ms. Kira.”

“Can I go home yet?” If you don’t ask you don’t get, Tsubasa told herself.

“No. But nice try.” Davies pulled out a chair, leaned forward, elbows on the table, “How do you feel about werewolves?”

“Terrified.” Tsubasa raised her head, “Why?”

“Want one for a co worker?”

Tsubasa’s expression straddled curious and aggravation. “Is it the one that wanted to gut me?”

“No.”

“Will agreeing get me out of here?”

“Yes.”

“Okay.” Tsubasa dropped her head back into her hands.

“It’s Koizumi’s fiancée.” Davies had her phone out again, checking her notes.

“Oh, that’s why Hanayo was so fond of me…”

“Well spotted.”

“Is she going to gut me?”

“The fiancée?”

“Koizumi.”

“She has, in practice, agreed not to by expressing a willingness, though reluctant, to work with you as long as we agree to her conditions.”

“The werewolf.”

“Yes.”

Tsubasa thought for a moment, then repeated “Okay.” Leaning forward, nose over Davies’s phone, “Co-worker?”

Davies grinned and pulled her phone back. “Longer story. What do you think of New Jersey?”

##############################################

Tam had led them to a room with a couch so Hanayo sat down and leaned against Rin, not saying anything for several minutes. Rin, after her initial sniff through Kayo-chin’s hair, picking up exhaustion, worry, frustration, just enjoyed the sensation of being close to each other. Eventually, they ended up lying side by side, Rin realizing how tired she was but too curious about what Hanayo was holding back to actually drift off.

“I’m glad you’re safe, Rin.” Hanayo whispered.

“Me too.” Rin’s voice boomed, “That was too scary.”

“Too scary?” Hanayo smelled furtive, like she had when she was keeping her job from Rin.

“Only when you told Maki to drag me off.” Rin sat up, proud, leaning back onto her arms. “I can handle anything. Kayo-chin doesn’t have to worry when I’m there.”

“I know.” Hanayo smiled, turning on her side to watch Rin, “I always feel safe with you.”

Rin knew Hanayo so well she didn’t need her nose to tell her that her mate was about to tell her something she was afraid Rin would be upset about.

“Just tell me, Kayo-chin.” Hanayo flopped over, face in her arms, while Rin nudged her, “I know you're nervous. It'll be okay.”

“Marry me.” Hanayo squeaked.

“I already said yes, did you forget? Did something fall on your head?” Rin started sniffing through Hanayo’s hair again, wondering if she’d missed an injury.

“No,” Hanayo giggled, Rin’s quick movements were tickling her. “How’d you like to be a tiger?”

Rin sat back, her face serious, “That’d be cool but people would be scared if I turned into a tiger. Now they think I’m a dog and everybody loves dogs.”

Hanayo laughed, falling into Rin, “I love you.” Then she took both of Rin’s hands, violet eyes determined as she looked over the glasses that had slid down her nose, “We’re getting married Saturday, Rin, and moving to Princeton.”

“You want to be a tiger?” Rin asked, not sure what this was about.

Hanayo forced herself not to glance away. Rin’s eyes were as honest and accepting as always so Hanayo let herself be brave and spoke the truth. “I want to know more about everything that happened tonight. I have an opportunity to do that. And I want you there with me.”

Rin thought quickly. She shouldn’t be surprised. When things caught Hanayo’s attention, she dove right in. At least this time she’d learned enough that she was willing to take Rin with her when the stuff was scary. There was only one answer.

“All right, Kayo-chin. If you go, I go.” Rin bumped forward, glomping onto Hanayo, “I love you.”

Hanayo felt every burden she’d been feeling ease as Rin embraced her, “I love you too.”

A/N: Wow, this chapter.

Hi.

#nicomaki #Casual Lunacy #nishikino maki #yazawa nico #howdy #howling #werewolf #rinpana #koizumi hanayo #hoshizora rin #science #spooky #theatre #coffeeshop #college #etc

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rey-skywalkin-away · 6 years

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Kanera Fix-It Fic I was Talking About

Y’all thought I was joking when I said I had 3000 words of a fic all lined up to fix this, right? GUESS AGAIN. 4117 WORDS. I had to delete 90% of my original 3000 words and re-write it just now to conform to what happened in the midseason premiere, and it took me four hours, but I did it! Anyway, I put myself into the queue to make an archiveofourown account, but that’ll take a month to activate, so until then, I’ll just post this chapter-by-chapter on here. I got part 1 done tonight, and it might be a few days before chapter 2: I have college life and work that’s going to be occupying my time this week. But I’m not abandoning this. I am FUELED BY PAIN.

@secrettunnelyeah you’ve been losing your shit with me, so I hope this helps. @fluffyapplecat thanks for all your support! @commoner64 because you said “please””. @blueboxdrifter you expressed support for this a few weeks ago, so here you go! @brickhawk you gotta help read this shit before the next chapter. I can’t post again without a second opinion.

Um, I hope you all enjoy.

Fair warning to everyone else: this is my first time posting any kind of story online, and it’s as rough as any story can be. I normally spend time editing my chapters, as any writer should, but I was just hammering it out as fast as I could to a) get it done before I fell asleep and b) to give you all a little hope after this agonizing premiere. So I’m sorry if it’s full of errors that I’m too tired to edit right now, and that the format under the cut is kind of wonky. I’m not entirely happy with the content, either–it’s kind of melodramatic and rushed for my taste, but I’m running off pure emotion right now. Hopefully I’ll find time to edit it before I before I post it on Archive. The chapter and some explanations for various things are down below. Happy readings, and everyone be okay out there!

*Writer’s Notes*

First off, I had literally 20 ideas for how Kanan would survive this premiere, and I had “explosion” down for two of them. Here, he survives by basically copying Ahsoka during her fight with the Inquisitors and Force-clapping backwards into Hera’s arms. He gets burned up and spends 3 weeks recovering in a bacta tank. No one’s going into much detail about it in the story, because they don’t want to re-imagine it all over again, but that’s what I was envisioning happening.

Second, Kanan is still blind: him getting to see Hera before he died was painful and sweet, but I honestly felt he had a lot of growth because of his injury, and it needed to stay. (And disability representation is important).

Third, I can’t start calling him “Caleb Dume”, guys, I’m sorry! I’ve spent four years calling him Kanan, and I can’t get into the habit of calling him Caleb.

Fourth, his beard and ponytail are coming back.

Fifth, I have a very large, multi-fandom, decades-long (in-universe) fanfiction world that I’m always playing with and developing to further my own writing prowess, character development, and storytelling skills. I’m going to make references to that multi-fandom work in this story (not a lot, but if there are moments where you’re thinking “where did that come from? I don’t remember that in the show or comics”, well, it might be from the multi-fandom). I’m including this story in my collection of works, and I don’t feel like editing it all over again just to include references to it. So you should all be able to follow what’s going on, but there might be a few odd moments.

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Chapter 1

Hera checked her calendar again, counting down days and weeks and making notes as she went. Nine weeks ago…captured. Eight-and-a-half weeks ago…rescued. Five weeks ago, we…and four weeks ago…well, I’m now very late. I should’ve started another cycle by now. And on a regular diet for over eight weeks, with additional nutritional supplements to get back to full strength after confinement. And we’re hardier than humans; we don’t get so out of sync after missing a few meals and getting a few electric shocks. So that shouldn’t explain why I’m late. She then checked her star charts for any habitable systems nearby, and winced when there weren’t any. Should I divert our flight path to go to the nearest star system just to buy a test? No, we’re fine on other supplies, and everyone will ask questions as to why I think we need to make a stop. She would’ve killed for a certified medical droid onboard her ship in that moment, but she was out of luck. They’d left the medical system on that nameless little asteroid five weeks ago now, and they were back to their own devices out in space. Great. Just great. Gonna have to go on instinct this time. And she wasn’t liking what she was coming up with.

Hera opened her mouth to say the word out loud, but couldn’t do it. Pregnant. You’re pregnant. You’re four weeks late, and your idiot self didn’t want to think about protection after you were saved by Kanan and the others. And after what nearly happened to Kanan…

After her rescue, after telling Kanan that she loved him, after he nearly died and had to spend three weeks in a bacta tank, the minute he’d showered off and went to his own bunk to be alone, she’d slipped into his room and reiterated her love for him. Free of drugs and pain, she’d finally broken down for once in her karking life and loved him, not as a general, or a pilot, or a freedom fighter. Just him and her, together, as it should always be. To remind herself that he’d been blasted back into her arms instead of dying in the fuel explosion, that he’d survived three flatlines before they could find him a bacta tank. That he’d eventually woken up and immediately began to listen for the sound of her voice. And afterwards, curled up in each other’s arms, she’d whispered that, now that his beard had grown back and his hair was beginning to return, he’d better keep it that way. Kanan had laughed, but they’d clutched each other in the semidarkess and just listened to each other breathe. No, of course you weren’t thinking clearly. He needed you, and you needed him. But look what came of it.

Hera rubbed the corners of her eyes and tried to think past the rising panic in her gut. What am I going to do about this? Pills? A clinic visit? Which is cheapest? What’s safest and gets me back into the pilot’s seat without anyone noticing something was wrong? She thought back to the pamphlets and medical texts she’d memorized when she’d left Ryloth to strike out on her own in the galaxy. Twi’leks were always targeted anywhere one went in the galaxy, and she’d prepared herself for what to do if she was attacked and how to handle any possible outcome. But thinking about the next few steps right now made Hera’s heart hurt. A few years ago, this would’ve been an easy decision for her. Three months ago, she wouldn’t have hesitated. Today…

Hera knew why she was conflicted. Will there ever be a tomorrow? We got lucky this time—will I be next? Or will the Force finally decide to call Kanan back to wherever it is Jedi go when they die? Will there ever be a second chance for us to conceive? She hadn’t given much thought to the end of the war, to her future, but sitting next to Kanan’s bacta tank and listening to his pulse monitor for several hours a day had broken something inside her, and she’d begun to think. A mild, deserted little planet. Not dry and harsh like Ryloth. Someplace cool and wet and green. A little home, with rooms for the rest of the family. Sabine can paint the family room with murals of our adventures. Maybe little tookas frolicking on the baby’s nursery walls. Zeb can carve us furniture with all the designs of Lasat that he’s lost. Whatever he can remember. Ezra…he can have a real bed, not a bunk. And a home-cooked meal that didn’t come out of a ration pack. When was the last time he had one of those? Chopper can have a nice oil bath and shut down without worrying that we’ll wake him up for an emergency. And our baby will run in the grass and will never know war, and…

Hera swallowed back tears and controlled her emotions. You’re dreaming again, Hera Syndulla. It’s one thing to admit your feelings for Kanan and finally be open in your relationship, and it’s another thing to abandon the rest of the galaxy to pursue your selfish dream. How many people want the same dream as you? How many people have the skills and resources to make that dream come true for everyone else that can’t help themselves? Your little fantasy will have to wait. Get rid of this and get back to work.

Her heart broke as she made up her mind, and a sudden fatigue overcame her. Raw emotion? Something related to the pregnancy? She knew nothing about pregnancy, come to think of it. Or how to be a mother. What makes you think you have time to learn? Especially now? You aren’t ready for this. You know what you have to do.

Hera wearily glanced at her chrono. A few hours until your shift. When I’m back in the pilot’s seat, I can tell the others I’ve got nerve damage from torture, and that I need to see a specialist somewhere. Maybe I could say we all deserve a treat after what we’ve all been through. She shuffled to her dresser and opened the secret panel on the side to check how many credits she had left in her emergency fund. Enough for the procedure and a little left over for the others. This could work. Damn it. This’ll have to do. There will be other opportunities, Hera. Just have hope.

But it could wait. The fatigue was seeping throughout her body, fogging up her mind and turning her limbs to jelly. A few hours to nap, and then it’ll be time to call everyone. In twenty-four hours, this will all be over. A few tears blurred her eyes, and she roughly wiped them away. Either get out all the sorrow now, or sleep and cry afterwards. Hera chose the latter, and she barely made it to her bunk before she collapsed on top of the covers and sank into a deep, misery-filled slumber.

———————————-

It only felt like a few minutes had passed before Hera was startled out of her uneasy sleep. “Who is it?” She rasped. She groggily sat up and wrapped a blanket around her shoulders.

“Hera? It’s me.” Hera shivered at the sound of his voice. Every word that he spoke seemed like a precious gift after what nearly happened. But now, after what she’d finally admitted to herself, he was the last person she wanted to see right now. Or, maybe she needed him most. Can he feel it? In the Force? Does he already know? Does he know what I’m planning to do?

“Kanan.” Her voice caught in her throat, and she couldn’t keep going.

“Can I come in? Please?”

Hera hesitated. Either you don’t tell him now, and you don’t involve him at all, or he knows what you’re planning to do. Could she do it alone? Without him? She didn’t know if it would be more painful to involve him, or to never let him know what could have been.

But Hera had made a commitment to Kanan when she’d told him she loved him, and there was no backing out of that commitment now, no matter how she’d chosen to handle her pregnancy. “Come in,” she whispered.

Kanan was framed in the light of the hall for only a second before he shut the door and crossed the distance to her bunk. He sat down next to her, his hands automatically wrapping around her shoulders; he froze when his hands met the rough fabric of her blanket. “Hera? What’s going on? Are you ill?”

Not in the way that you’re thinking, but yes. “What makes you say that?”

“Well, I…” He hesitated. “I know it’s getting pretty old for me to say it, but I feel a…disturbance in the Force. Around you.”

Hera tensed up. Oh karabast. He knows. “Tell me what you feel.” In their first years together on the Ghost, if they had time to rest, they’d park the ship in the first meadow they could find. Stretched out on the hull, in the light of the stars above, Kanan would describe the world to her as he felt it in the Force. A web connecting all living things, from the deadly dance of predator and prey in the grasses below them, the cries of the plants as they cried out for rain, jostled to and fro by the silent paws of some canid beast, to the needy, incessant hunger of newborn chicks in the trees at the edge of the meadow…

This time, she couldn’t control her tears, and Kanan’s fingers were immediately brushing them away from the corners of her eyes as soon as she sucked in a strangled breath of air. “I feel…you’re so unhappy. You’re full of…pain, and despair. Hera, I don’t understand. Why do you feel like you’re losing something?”

He doesn’t know. Oh stars, if there was only another way…But there wasn’t. She gently took one of his hands away from her face and held it in her own. “You can’t understand because you’re looking in the wrong place.”

Kanan cocked his head. “What do you mean?”

“You’re looking into my mind…” She held his hand up, paused, and pressed his fingers against the still-flat skin of her lower torso. “Try feeling here, and you’ll know why I’m so conflicted.”

Hera wasn’t sure if he felt something in the Force or if he immediately understood her implication. “Hera–!”

“Only five weeks,” she whispered. “I wasn’t assaulted in prison, so I definitely know it’s yours. And I know the date of conception. But only five weeks. Not that far along, really…” She trailed off as she noticed Kanan’s face shutting down, closing off all emotion. Oh no. She waited a few moments to allow him to process the news, to say something, anything, but he didn’t. “Kanan? Luv? Tell me—what’s going through your head right now?”

He coughed. “Do you have any water?”

“I—uh—yes. There’s a pitcher and some cups on the dresser. To the left of my ‘fresher.” He nearly banged his head on the top of the bunk as he stood up and held out his hand to feel his way along. “No, your left.”

He bumped against the edge of the dresser and winced. “Do you want any?”

This was definitely not the reaction she was expecting. “…sure. I guess.”

Kanan poured two cups of water, spilling what seemed like half the jug before he was done. Hera took the cup from him so he could have a free hand to feel his way back to her side without hurting himself further. She sipped her water while he chugged his straight down and tossed the cup aside. “Kanan. Please. Talk to me.”

He sighed. “I don’t…I don’t know where to begin.”

“I don’t either. But we have to start somewhere.”

“Well then…I suppose…did you ever want to be a mother?”

Hera sat down her cup and wrapped the blanket tighter around herself. “I wasn’t lying when I told you that I hadn’t given much thought about my future after the war. But I started thinking about it when you nearly died.”

Kanan’s breath came in a soft, weak gasp, and he pulled Hera into his arms. She melted into his embrace and felt his trembling. At least he doesn’t hate me. And he knows me well enough to know what my feelings are on this. Somehow, she allowed herself to speak about her dream life after the war: their quiet home together, the rooms for the rest of the family, their child playing in the yard outside. She felt his tears begin to run down his cheeks and drip on top of her lekku, and she knew that he could feel her sorrow in the Force.

“You know,” he said slowly. “I hadn’t thought much about kids, either. But I started thinking about them more when we found the others. Especially Ezra. We’re like their parents already, aren’t we?”

Hera chuckled, in spite of her pain. “We definitely are.”

“And I started to think…it wouldn’t be so bad, to do it all over again. But with a baby of our own…”

Hera closed her eyes and pressed herself against his chest. “But…?”

Kanan swallowed; she could feel the effort it took him. “But I know you. And whatever you choose to do, no matter my feelings…I’ll support your decision. You’re the pregnant one, after all. You’re the one at risk. Its—it’s up to you.”

“What are your feelings, Kanan?”

“They don’t matter.”

Hera sat back and cupped his face in her hands. “Yes, they do. I love you Kanan, and I wouldn’t have told you about this if I didn’t want to involve you, no matter what. So please, tell me your honest, true feelings.”

“Honestly…I’d love nothing more than to have a baby with you. I don’t know when we’d get another chance, with the war…”

Hera sobbed, half with relief and love, half with pain. “This damn war. It poisons everything it touches, including us. Our futures…”

Kanan started to cry again. “I know you. And I know what you want to do. I know it already.”

“I want this baby, too, but I don’t know how we’d make time. We can’t have a baby here, on the Ghost. It would be cruel just to bring it into the world and have it blow up with us in battle. Or die from some sickness.” Everyone knew babies didn’t thrive in prolonged periods in space. “And we can’t send it to my father; you know how dangerous it is on Ryloth.” She’d told him about her brother before, and he nodded. She started to cry again, and they held each other for long, painful minutes. Stang, I don’t want to do this. But I have to. What other choice do I have? I can’t leave the war. Not while others suffer. But at least I won’t have to do this alone.

But, for some reason, she felt tension in Kanan’s arms. Hera pulled back again. “What is it?” Why do you look so…guilty?

“We could leave the Rebellion and raise the baby together. Or get an abortion.” Hera made a sound of assent in the back of her throat. “Or…there’s another option.”

“What are you talking about?”

“What if I were to leave the Rebellion, maybe with Ezra, and the two of us raise the baby while you and the others keep fighting?”

Hera gasped. “Leave? Are you serious?” Was he so upset about what happened at the fuel depot that he wants to run away?

“I don’t know how to put this into words. When I was in the bacta tank, in the coma, I remembered something. Something from…right after Master Billaba died. I’d forgotten it until I was at the edge of death. I don’t remember what happened, but… I woke up with the sense that I was supposed to die at the fuel depot.” He choked on the last few words, and Hera couldn’t have spoken if she tried. “And I feel that, whatever happened in that blank in my memory as I was running away from her body, it saved me. Not…oh karabast, I don’t know how to explain it. But whatever it was, it gave me a feeling: that I needed to leave the conflict, or else I wouldn’t get a second chance to live. For some reason, Ezra’s been getting a weird feeling, too. Not quite the same as me, I don’t think, but he’s been hinting that we need to leave and do more Jedi work away from the rest of the group. Maybe something similar happened to him when he was younger. I don’t know. I haven’t been able to ask. But…”

Hera stood up. “After everything that happened, you were just going to leave us?” Leave me? She couldn’t fault him for listening to his visions, but it stung, especially after she’d finally opened up and bared her soul to him for the first time in years. I give you my love and you leave. “Whatever happened to being careful about listening your visions? Or was that all just a bunch of Jedi nonsense you were feeding to Ezra? Hmm?”

“Absolutely not. This feels completely different from a Force vision. Like…someone physically told me these things and blocked my memory. Not the Force. Not some cosmic energy. A person.”

“So you’re going to run away because of some half-remembered whispers?”

He felt for her hand and pulled her back onto the bunk. “Hera Syndulla, I love you. I love you more than I ever knew I was capable of loving someone. And I wouldn’t leave you and the others unless I was absolutely certain that this vision was something I needed to listen to. It’s going to kill me inside to do it, but I believe it’s what must be done if we want to survive. What if there are other Inquisitors out there? And what if Vader decides to end us once and for all, especially with what happened at the fuel depot? I’m stronger now, Ezra and I both are, but we couldn’t defeat him. And I couldn’t let the rest of you be put in jeopardy because you’ve got two Force-users leaving a trail for a Sith Lord to follow.”

Hera squeezed his hand. Just a bit. “So…you’d leave? And raise the baby? Are you sure you could do it? With your blindness?”

“Ezra could be my eyes and help out. And think about it: we could keep the house while you’re all away, and you could visit whenever you wanted, and keep fighting. And you’d know that there’d always be a home for you to return to, and the minute you wanted out of the fight, we’d be there, waiting for you.”

Hera turned away. “Could you really do that? Wait at home while we risked our lives out on the battlefield?”

Kanan sighed. “I’d be happiest if you were home with us. And I want to keep fighting, same as you. But if we could make some of your dream come true this way…I’d bow out.” His voice caught, and Hera suddenly realized how hard this all was for him. “Just…promise me one thing. Could you do that?”

Hera took his hands again. “Ask me first.”

“If this war keeps dragging on…will you consider finding a window of opportunity to leave? And be with us?”

Could you do that? Leave the fight, even if it wasn’t over? But Kanan was sacrificing part of his happiness, too. He’d be worrying every day, watching their child, waiting for her to come home. And if she never did, all he’d have was their baby to remind himself of how happy they could’ve been. Hera reached over and cupped his cheek in her hand, her heart bursting with love for him. “Yes. I will consider it, Kanan, knowing that you’re waiting for me. You’re the only one who could make me leave this fight. You…and the baby.”

Kanan sobbed with joy and pulled her into a crushing hug. They cried together again, but Hera’s joy was bittersweet. Why can’t I get to fully enjoy my dream? I want to be at home with Kanan and the baby. But I can’t. Not just yet.

But this way, there was a chance to have that future, when there otherwise wouldn’t be. And Hera Syndulla’s life was never fair from the moment she was born; she knew it, and wasn’t one to dwell on it for long. Besides, there were much more wonderful things to think about. A baby. We’re having a baby. “If I don’t miscarry, that is,” she muttered to herself.

Kanan frowned. “What was that?”

Hera wiped her eyes and looked around to find some tissues for them both. “Sorry, thinking out loud.”

“About miscarrying?”

Hera found some tissues and grabbed them. She passed a few to Kanan and blew her nose. “Just…it would be awful for us to go to all this trouble just for me to miscarry after the stress of a fight.”

“Hmm. You’re right. Maybe we could hang back for a while and do some logistics work. At least until you’re further along.”

“I’m going to have to find a way to hide this pregnancy, Kanan. If Inquisitors are still out there, hunting down Force-sensitive children, they’ll come for our baby, I’m sure of it.” She paused. “Is there a chance the baby could be Force-sensitive?”

Kanan blew his nose and she took it from him to throw in the trash. “I don’t know. There was a pretty big taboo about getting pregnant at the Temple, if you could imagine that. But I guess there’s a strong possibility of it.”

“Then we’ll have to hide my pregnancy. No one can know about it. Well…maybe Mon Mothma. But she’s it, outside of the crew.”

“I…oh damn, I think that means that I’ll have to fake my death. Ezra, too, if he comes along to help out.”

Hera banged her head on the top of her bunk. “Ow! What?!”

“Careful, careful—the baby—“

“A bruised lek won’t kill the baby, Kanan. But faking your death—“

“Well, that’s what we’ll have to do if we want to make sure we’re not tracked down. If everyone believes without a shadow of a doubt that we’re gone, no one will come looking for us. And your “grief” will give you an excuse to pull back for a few months, while you need to hide the bump.” Kanan suddenly moved off the bed and ran to the tiny ‘fresher.

“Kanan!” But he waved her away, and she hung back, waiting until he was done vomiting. Then, she found a rag and wet it from the remaining water in the jug. She went over to Kanan, who was still slumped over the toilet. She pulled him away from the bowl and gently began wiping his face. “I’m the one who’s supposed to be getting morning sickness, remember?”

He snorted, but let her keep tending him. “It’s just…we’re going to have to make sure everyone thinks, beyond a doubt, that we’re dead. And that means leaving no body— ” He turned around to retch again, but nothing came up. “And that means—fire, and explosions—“

“Oh, Kanan…” She held him until the panic attack—or flashback, whatever it was—subsided, and he’d calmed down again. “We’ll find a way to make it work. A safe way. If there’s anyone who could do it, it would be Sabine.”

“And how could I do that to Ezra? Put him at risk like that?”

“Well, we have to tell him about the baby, first. We’ll have to tell everyone. But, for right now, let’s just go lie down.” She helped him to his feet and into her bed. They crawled under the covers together, and Hera settled comfortably into his arms. I don’t know how I lived without this for so long. This feels so right, to be here with him.

Kanan’s eyes were drooping. “Don’t you have a shift soon?”

Hera’s fatigue was setting in again. “I’ll just tell one of the others that I have a call to take from someone in Rebel command. They’ll understand. Or Chopper can take the shift.” She yawned and couldn’t keep her eyes open. “I’ll deal with it later.”

They fell asleep, wary about the future, but both full to the brim with love for each other and the life beginning in Hera’s body.

—————————-

Okay, so I promise that this story is going to get happier, okay? There’s just a lot of depressing stuff that needs to be ironed out in this first chapter. It’s not going to be all sunshine and roses, but it will have a happy ending.

I also was originally going to have Kanan and Ezra faking their deaths by pretending to blow up when the rebels attacked a weapons supply store. They were going to dig tunnels underneath and be well-away before the explosion happened, but were going to pretend to be killed by the fire/explosion/falling debris. It hits so close to home in light of the midseason premiere that I don’t know if I can do it.

Or maybe I will. Because I’m kind of sadistic.

Also, the reference to Kanan being “warned” to escape is the reference to my multi-fandom story. There’s some Prisoner of Azkaban-level time travel shenanigans that go on, but it’s not “adult Kanan visits ‘lil Caleb”. It’s a lot more complicated and I don’t feel comfortable explaining it.

#kanera #star wars rebels spoilers #kanan jarrus #hera syndulla #swr spoilers #i'll tag more characters as they appear #but here ya go #my rough stories #star wars rebels

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sanderssidesfanfiction · 6 years

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A System of Sides: Chapter Fourteen

A/N: Don’t be confused by the end of this chapter, there’s one last chapter after this!

PREV | NEXT

Words: 3,356

Warnings: yelling, astral projection mention, fear of abandonment, car accident mention

Thomas had barely closed the door after Virgil stormed in, steaming mad and out for blood, and Virgil was already growling out questions. "What did I ever do to you?!"

Virgil didn't get any response from Thomas other than a confused blink, and Virgil growled. "I don't understand! What do the others have that I don't?! After all these years, how could you do this to me! You're my best friend, Thomas! Or at least, I thought you were!"

Thomas held up his hands. "Woah, hang on, Virgil. I don't even know what you're talking about."

"You don't even know what I'm talking about," Virgil repeated hollowly. He chuckled. "Well, I guess that seals it! I'm nothing more than dirt, am I?! No, because you'd rather have the others be your friends than me!"

"What?! No!" Thomas exclaimed. "Virgil, where would you even get that idea?!"

Virgil shook in his anger as he growled out, "Well, you seemed all too eager to talk to them first! And hey, it's not like they've always shut me out, giving me the idea that they're better than me! Or at least, that they think they are..."

Thomas sighed. "Virgil, do you need a hug?"

Virgil took a shaky breath and shook his head. "I don't want your pity."

"It's not pity, it's legitimate concern," Thomas said. "Please? You're shaking."

Virgil sighed, putting his binder on Thomas' bed and shrugging. "Let's just get it over with, then."

Thomas stepped closer and hugged him, while Virgil held his hands close to his chest. Virgil sighed and continued to shake, but all the anger was draining from his body, to be left with the raw fear that had been fueling his rage. He didn't want to be forgotten; he didn't want the others to replace his position as Thomas' friend. Even if Virgil wasn't Thomas' best friend, Thomas was certainly Virgil's, and it scared him beyond belief to possibly lose his best friend. "Thomas," he whispered. "I'm scared."

He was just hugged tighter. "I know you are," Thomas whispered. "I am too."

Virgil looked up and Thomas took a step back, ending the hug. One one hand, Virgil was glad, seeing as how a serious discussion was probably about to arise. On the other hand, he really needed the touch and didn't want it to end. "Why would you be scared?" Virgil forced himself to ask. "You have everything going for you right now; you're finally free from being frontstuck, the others are working on a plan to get us all out of this mess, and they absolutely adore you! You don't have a reason to be scared! At least...none that I can see."

"I was just reunited with three of my friends from childhood who have all been watching me for years even though I barely knew they existed, and I have to trust them with my life if I want to get out of this situation at all. They've grown up and changed in ways that I never could have imagined, and all of them are ready to defend me to their dying breath, but not each other. I would say that's plenty reason to be scared," Thomas pointed out.

Thomas did make a good point when he really wanted to, much as Virgil really didn't want to admit it. "Okay, so we're both scared, what's that going to get us?" Virgil asked. "All it means is that the both of us might be nervous wrecks when we're needed most."

"Not if we reassure each other that everything will be all right," Thomas said. "You know the three out there better than I do, do you believe that they can get us out of this?"

Virgil thought it over. After everything he had been through; the taunts, the teasing, the feelings of being unwelcome, he still believed in the others as much as he believed in himself or Thomas. "Yeah," he said. "They can get us through this. What about you?"

Thomas blinked. "What about me?"

"Are you going to let them get in-between us?" Virgil asked. "Get so caught up in new friends that you forget about old ones?"

"Of course not," Thomas said. "I would never do that willingly or wittingly. You and I are going to be friends through-and-through until the end."

Virgil smirked. "Ride or die, right?"

"You know it," Thomas laughed. "What's with the binder, by the way? I didn't see you have it downstairs so it must have been important for you to grab it while I was up here."

Virgil felt his ears heat up, suddenly very self-conscious. "Oh, right, that..." He cleared his throat. "Those are, uh, letters to you. From when I'd get really frustrated or angry or scared and needed to calm down, but either couldn't come to your room or wouldn't due to how freaked out I was. Now that you're not frontstuck, and can leave front if necessary, I wouldn't have to be giving the body a panic attack if I talked to you. So the letters are a bit of a moot point. I want you to have them."

Thomas frowned. "You...want me to have them?" he repeated. "Aren't these really personal?"

Virgil shrugged. "Yeah, but I trust you not to show them to anyone else, and that binder's pretty full anyway. It's about time I started a new one."

Thomas looked over at the binder and offered a small grin. "I really don't know what to say, Virgil, thank you. I'm touched you'd trust me with this. I also think it's sweet that in times of stress, you'd write to me, of all people."

"I took over your anxieties from a very young age, I figured the least that you could do in return was be a pretend audience to all the things I saw possibly going wrong." Virgil shook his head. "It all sounds really cheesy saying it out loud, but there's no one I trust more than you, Thomas, I mean it. Patton and Roman and Logan? I mean, they're great guys, but I don't want to tell them my deepest, darkest secrets. You know all of those already. You were the first person I came to when I realized there was a possibility I might not be straight and was wondering if my whole life was a lie, for goodness sake! I can't think of someone I'd trust more!"

Thomas smiled and Virgil mirrored the expression. "I'm really glad you're not stuck at front anymore, it's been too long," Virgil said.

"I know. I'm really glad to see all of you again, but I'm especially glad that you don't have to astral-project yourself into my room just to have a conversation anymore. I could come to your room if I needed to!" Thomas said.

"Uh, my room has a reputation for giving anyone who enters except me panic attacks, so I wouldn't recommend that. But the emotions behind that still stand, it's nice to be free to roam around," Virgil agreed. "I have no doubt Roman will want to take you on adventures in the Inner World, and Logan will want to do research and projects in here with you again, and Patton will probably just want to sit next to you on the couch in the Common Room and possibly cuddle. He's clingy."

Thomas laughed. "Well he can't be all bad if you're endorsing him. Clingy isn't even a bad thing, necessarily!"

"I know it's not, but it's nice to have fair warning when it comes to being tackled in a hug," Virgil said with a sly grin.

"Oh, wow, I can hardly wait to see what's going on with everyone these days," Thomas said. "Besides the arguing, I mean. I can live without the arguing."

"Can't we all?" Virgil asked. "I don't really know what goes on outside arguing either. Usually we just...cofront or mill around. Don't tell anyone, but I garden outside in the courtyard. Patton may or may not color, or possibly make coloring pages? Logan cooks. And Roman...well, he's almost always on one adventure or another when he's not cofronting."

"Logan cooks?" Thomas asked, mildly surprised.

"I think he compares it to chemistry," Virgil said with a shrug. "I was just as confused as you when he figured out that he really liked it. Roman always turns the food psychedelic colors before Logan cooks, if at all possible. Sometimes the end result of Logan's cooking looks like radioactive sludge because of it. But it's still cool."

"Eating something that looks like radioactive sludge could be fun, and I imagine it can't be any more unhealthy than my regular eating habits," Thomas joked.

Virgil smiled. "I'm...glad we're still good. I was worried that the others would push me out of the picture..."

"Of course they won't, I won't let them," Thomas assured. "You are just as important as them, Virgil, don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise, okay? You're just as important, and just as helpful, and just as much a part of this group as any of them are. You understand?"

Tears pricked Virgil's eyes as he nodded, a watery smile taking over his face. "Thank you," he whispered in a raspy voice. "Thank you, thank you, thank you."

"Of course," Thomas said, opening his arms. "Come here, Virge."

And Virgil threw himself into Thomas' arms, too happy about sticking around to worry about what anyone else might think or what it would do to his reputation. He was part of a family, and no one could take that away from him now.

After a time, Virgil pulled away and wiped at his cheeks to remove any traces of him crying. "Should we go downstairs and see if the others have a plan for getting us out of this situation?" he asked.

"Yeah, let's go," Thomas said.

And so the two opened Thomas' door and walked down the steps, confident in their ability to get out of this mess alive.

The three others all welcomed Thomas and Virgil with open relief. "What was the yelling about in there?" Patton asked. "Something wrong?"

"No, just a little misunderstanding, is all," Virgil brushed off. "What do you guys have by way of a plan for getting out of here?"

"Actually, we were waiting for you two to come to a conclusion in your conversation before we fully formulated a plan. It would be best for everyone involved if we had approval from the two of you as well as our own personal opinions," Logan said. "We know of the steps we have to take in order to get home, but how we achieve those steps is still up for much debate."

"Why don't we just front and work on it as we go?" Virgil suggested.

Logan and Roman looked at him like he had grown a second head. "Wh-what?" Roman asked.

"Well, we can plan all we like but getting home sooner rather than later would be nice, and all that planning could come to a stop because if we move five feet away we could get cell service again. All of us can be coconscious and we can work together on the plan as we go," Virgil proposed. "Any objections?"

Patton raised his hand. "What if we don't know what to do in the middle of something and uh...we freeze up again?"

"Better to be somewhere someone can see us and call for help than argue over it here and risk getting into more trouble," Virgil reasoned. "I think it would just be faster if we started walking."

There was a pregnant pause as everyone considered this. "I trust you, Virge. Always have and always will, so I'm with you on this one," Thomas said.

"It does have logical reasoning behind it," Logan allowed.

"I suppose it couldn't hurt us," Roman agreed.

"Who's going to front and who's going to be coconscious here?" Patton asked.

"I can front," Thomas said. "Anyone want to cofront?"

"I can," Virgil said. "I'll keep an eye out for possible danger and possible help."

"Roman and I can focus on the plan if we are simply coconscious so I won't object if nothing untoward happens," Logan said.

"I'll make sure no one gets too worked up!" Patton volunteered.

Virgil looked at Thomas and Thomas was looking right back at him, a kind smile on his face. "You ready?" Thomas asked him.

Virgil nodded and closed his eyes, forcing the Inner World away so he could focus on outside.

The first thing he felt was pain. It was traveling up from his legs and radiating from his forehead. The airbags had deployed, and the front of the car had crumpled. "The insurance company is going to have a field day," Thomas muttered next to him.

Virgil laughed. He couldn't help it; that was something only Thomas would worry about. Then again, in this system it was hard to say anyone was responsible about the outside world except Thomas.

Undoing his seat belt, Virgil tried opening the driver's side door. It opened a little bit, enough to let the rain in, but not enough to get out. There was some rock or something on the outside that was blocking it.

"I suppose we'll be climbing out the back, then," Logan said from somewhere behind Virgil.

"Yup," Virgil sighed, clambering over the space between the front two seats that was filled with suspicious trash. "You really need to clean this car, Thomas."

"I know," Thomas sighed. "Not exactly my finest moment, I haven't had a lot of time to myself lately."

Virgil snorted. "Time to yourself? You are joking. You share a head with four other people."

"Time alone at front, then," Thomas said as he opened the back door to the car.

Virgil climbed out and inspected the car. "Dude, that is completely totaled. Glad we somehow didn't die, though."

Thomas made a dry laugh. "Yeah, I guess not dying is pretty good."

Virgil checked the cell phone. Still no cell signal. "Thomas? Do you know the way home?" he asked.

"Uh, yeah, hang on..." Thomas said. "I can't give you exact directions, but I can tell you where to go if we follow the road back the way we came."

"Joy," Virgil said. He took a step forward and felt a sharp pain from his ankle. "Ow!"

"Ooh, that's sprained," Thomas said. "I'm pretty sure that's sprained."

Virgil shifted his weight to his other foot, which was thankfully fine. "So we have to hop our way home? Because last I checked we don't drag around medical boots everywhere we go."

"Just try not to focus on the pain, for now," Logan said. Virgil could see in his mind's eye Logan adjusting his glasses, even though he was fairly certain he wasn't actually seeing Logan. "We can get treatment for the ankle later. I'm surprised that's the only problem that's shown itself so far."

Virgil took another step, wincing at the pain. The rain was still coming down, which wasn't helping his mood much, and even Thomas felt to be in low spirits. "We can't walk very far like this," he said. "Let's hope we get somewhere with a cell signal soon."

"Oh!" Roman exclaimed, causing Virgil to nearly make the body jump. "How far away is the nearest fast-food place?! They almost always have free Wi-Fi!"

"I think it was at the last corner, but that was all the way up the hill and maybe another quarter-mile from there," Thomas said.

Virgil grit his teeth. "Better start moving then," he mumbled.

Every step with his bad ankle caused him to wince but he forced down the pain as much as he could. He was a protector at his core, this is what he was made for, he could do this.

The rain was beating down harder if that was possible and the wind was picking up but Virgil just kept walking. He didn't know where Thomas' friends wanted to go that involved taking this back road, but he didn't want to make plans to go there ever again.

Step left, step right, breathe through the pain, you've got this Virgil, you can do this. A mantra going through his head the whole time, Virgil dragged himself up the hill, walking for as long as he could before the pain became to much and he started limping, tears forming in his eyes from the pain, but he could do this, he was the original protector, he was strong, he could fight...

Thomas was by his side the whole time, helping them walk, looking up the road for any cars, practicing what he'd say if someone stopped to ask if he was okay.

Virgil tripped and stumbled into the mud, but got up and kept walking. He could do this. His single-handed stubborn determination and his fear of dying out here alone were enough to get him up the hill, where his legs almost gave out.

"Hey, Virge, you did great, why don't you let me do most of the walking now?" Thomas offered.

"Because you'll feel the pain," Virgil said.

"I feel it already, Virge, we're cofronting. But you're pushing yourself almost over the edge and I don't want you getting hurt," Thomas said. "Let me do the worrying for a little while."

"Can't," Virgil said. "This is what I resort to in emergencies, and if I calm down during this then something's more wrong with me than the situation."

Thomas sighed. "Well, I suppose I can see where you're coming from. Still, if you let me focus on the walking I think you'd feel a little better."

Virgil, feeling too tired to even argue at this point, nodded and let Thomas take control of the legs. He used the extra focus that had been going into that to now examine his head.

He felt along his hair line and winced as he went a little lower. Hitting the airbags hard was bound to leave a bruise; he just hoped they didn't have a concussion.

The fast-food place came into view, and Virgil helped Thomas move faster until they were in the doorway and there were people coming over to check on them. "Sir, are you all right?" one woman asked.

Thomas took over the mouth, an action for which Virgil would be eternally grateful. "I got into a car accident down the road, I had no cell service. Is there Wi-Fi here? I need to call Triple-A for a tow-truck, at least."

People were fussing over him but he was told that yes, there was Wi-Fi. Someone asked if they should call an ambulance, which freaked Virgil and Patton out more than a bit, but Logan said might not be a bad idea. At the very least, someone needed to check them over, and it wasn't like they could simply drive to the ER.

The rest of the evening was a bit of a blur, if Virgil was being honest. Thomas called a tow-truck, and an ambulance came to the fast-food place and the paramedics checked them over, concluding they had a mild concussion and a sprained ankle, as well as some cuts no one had noticed.

Thomas also called Joan and explained the long and short of what had happened, asking them for a ride home and a chance to reschedule once the ankle boot they needed was gone and the concussion had cleared up.

Obviously they got home somehow, Thomas took off the clothes they had been wearing and quickly showered to get most of the mud and grime off the body. But then it was a quick change into sweatpants before Thomas collapsed on the bed, and Virgil was drifting in and out of front when he felt Thomas hug him in the Inner World, help him to his room, and Virgil was out like a light, content in knowing that they were (relatively speaking) safe.

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