#and then jedi are uh uh you miss your mom so bad

[cienie-isengardu]

[Star Wars: Episode I - Obi Wan Kenobi]

#star wars #obi wan kenobi #anakin skywalker #anakin at age of ~10 showed compassion bravery eagerness to learn and respect to elders but #all the jedi traits #and then he was trained in Yoda's Jedi Order and he ended as a sith lord #not saying anything but... #on serious note i like that comics make a point about bravery of leaving mother #to travel far away and meet unknown jedi masters #and then jedi are uh uh you miss your mom so bad #heh

[phoenixyfriend]

I’ve been trying to figure out the best obi wan ship. They all have one slightly problematic thing this way or that. I’ve landed on the idea of obi wan and an equal is pretty top tier. But then I saw a picture of Coran from voltron. Coran and Obiwan might be a disaster but also both are dad shaped, both are bad ass, both are ginger, both have an accent. I think it could work. But another part of me is like Coran is just obi and jarjar mashed together. At the very least they hooked up.

Hey I just had restaurant ramen and Starbucks and actually feel like a human being so let's do something unnecessary but funny. I'm taking this as a challenge, anon.

Also IMO Coran has more in common with C3P0 than with JarJar

So obviously, both of these happen in Big Space, but the difference appears to be density. We see about the same complexity of culture and species interactions, but Voltron covers more galaxies. It's vaguely implied that Earth, at least, is the only planet with sapient life in the Milky Way.

I think the way I want to play this out, culturally, is that the Voltron area of the universe covers a much wider, but much more sparsely populated area, while the SW-verse is just the one very densely populated (in part because apparently humans just went Literally Everywhere) galaxy, where they didn't necessarily bother with developing the tech to go to other galaxies (except Rishi, which only sort of counts) because they haven't really even charted out their own yet. It was never contacted by the Voltron side of things because [checks notecards full of excuses] it's really far away from Altea and all that, and the Force shielded the galaxy from Galra interests because Reasons.

All this to say that the two franchises didn't interact until after the Voltron plotline was already over. We'll say it went mostly canon, except Allura survived because uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh fuck that.

We'll say that this is mid-TCW, you know, before Obi-Wan is a bundle of repressed traumas and bad coping mechanisms that's lost almost everyone he's ever loved to the dark side through death or corruption. He's still (mostly) okay! Anakin's not dark (or at least, not as dark as he could be; Obi-Wan doesn't know about the Tuskens), and Ahsoka's still in good standing and most people are alive and--and okay the army is a massive ethical violation he hates with his very soul and he misses Qui-Gon and Anakin's keeping secrets and pulling away from him every day but He's Fine, Guys.

He's Fine.

In comes a ship from not Wild Space, but beyond that. Intergalactic visitors, from the direction of the deeply concerning Force bullshit they felt a few years ago. Translation tech is decent enough on both sides that they get to talking pretty quickly. The explorer is actually a member of the Blade of Marmora, who gets the absolute most basic info (approximately this many inhabited planets, approximately this many trillions of sapients in the recorded galaxy, basic structure of the government for the past however many years, most recent conflict, etc.)

BoM person is like "cool, okay so you guys are really well set-up so I'm just gonna head back and kick this up a few rungs of the coalition ladder because this is way above my paygrade, I'll make sure you get some diplomats who can maybe help out with the whole galactic civil war situation as neutral parties."

The Voltron Coalition does send a diplomat! They, uh, also send Coran, who isn't technically a diplomat, but he's high-level.

The thing is, okay, that Coran is mostly just... passably competent at things. He's a jack of all trades, master of none type. He knows a lot of things, actually, but his practical knowledge in high pressure situations tends to be up in the air. He knows how to fix the Castle Ship and various technologies, but all of that info is ten thousand years out of date. He was a competent fighter at one point but these days his back gives out. He's very knowledgeable regarding intergalactic politics but, again, that information is ten thousand years out of date. He's also a little prone to social gaffs in dicey situations (e.g. the inciting incident in the Voltron Show episode where he misses the single day with clear skies), but puts in so much goddamn effort to make things happen.

In this manner, he's like a warped mirror of what Obi-Wan is and could be.

THAT SAID

Coran is actually really good with teenagers, and specifically with training them.

And Obi-Wan... isn't.

Obi-Wan's snarky and snippy and sassy, and he's decent enough at teaching and he's great at being a jokey friend and all, but he's not necessarily very good at emotions. And unfortunately for Obi-Wan, the teenagers he spends the most time with are Really Full Of Emotions. He tries, bless him, but he's just... he doesn't respond well to emotional conversations at the best of times.

His son-figure saying "You're like a father to me" leads to a response of... radio silence. Guys. That's not the mark of a man who knows how to talk about his feelings with the people he cares about.

In swans Coran with the various other diplomatic envoys of the visiting extragalactic community. The entire situation is really leading to a lull in the war because nobody wants to risk pissing off this clearly well-funded, well-powered third party. As a result, many of the High Generals can interact with the envoys, even if they spend quite a bit of time eyeing the Separatist representatives on the other side of the room, because clearly Everyone Needs A Seat At This Table.

It's a very tense situation.

Obviously, Coran is exactly the weird uncle that goes around telling plausibly-exaggerated stories about Weblums and Yalmors and Balmeras. I'm going to say at least one former Paladin is there, maybe Hunk. Hunk's fun, and also very willing to help Coran make friends and seem Amicable instead of Distant by correcting some of the exaggerations. There's a nice, calm atmosphere in a bubble around Coran and his nonsense, and it's a weird situation but arguably just... you know. It's good. He's good at making people feel safe around him.

Cue the hissed argument between Skywalker and Kenobi. The actual cause of said argument isn't important, just the fact that, in a dark corner where they're less likely to cause a PR issue, Anakin and Obi-Wan are having it out. Anakin's maybe twenty, still a lanky ragebaby, all that fun stuff. Obi-Wan is a the endpoint of every too-young brotherdad. He's thirty-six but feels like he's sixty-three. He's tired, but trying so damn hard to still connect with Anakin and just--just--

Obi-Wan gives himself a few minutes to calm down before following Anakin. He doesn't even remember what they were arguing about, really, but he has to mend the bridge before it frays even more than it already has. If Anakin goes to Palpatine for advice again, he's going to... do something. Obi-Wan isn't sure what, but he just has to fix this.

What he finds is... well, Anakin did end up going to vent to a man of an earlier generation who acts like a slightly eccentric older relative, but it's not Palpatine for once.

The goofy, slightly abrasive but mostly charming, brightly-colored representative of the Voltron Coalition is standing in the little balcony that Anakin's made it to, listening as Obi-Wan's recently-knighted padawan vents. The man nods and makes noises at the appropriate times, and then asks questions that are... maybe a little too accurate.

"You said that you view him as a father, that he raised you after you left your mother."

"Well, yeah, but he doesn't think I'm ready, or--"

"No parent ever does."

"...my mom thought I was ready to become a Jedi."

"I can't speak for your mother," the representative says, "but the princess of my people, Allura... I half-raised that girl from the beginning, and after the destruction of Altea, we were all the other had left. I watched her lead battles and bring life to planets, trying to rebuild a universe out of the ashes of what we'd left behind... I saw the evidence with my own eyes, and I still, every time, I worried for her."

"Why?"

"I worried that she'd be hurt, that she wasn't ready, that she'd make a decision she regretted. Often, she did, and I had to help her back up, and while she's always come back, stronger than before... she is the closest thing I have ever had to a daughter, and I will always worry for her. Every parent does. Do you think, perhaps, that your own Jedi Master, that you consider a father, may worry because he looks at you like a son? That it's not that he doesn't trust you, but that he doesn't trust the world around you?"

Obi-Wan feels his heart in his throat.

The conversation continues in that vein. While Obi-Wan can't say he likes the fact that this stranger is putting words in his mouth, if only as hypotheticals, he can't deny that there's a part of him that relaxes as Anakin does, as every frustrated fresh-knight question gets a measured elderly-steward response that's angled to consider the interpretation that favors Anakin and Obi-Wan in equal measure. Every word encourages Anakin to talk things out and lay boundaries and express his frustrations to Obi-Wan in the plainest words possible.

There's a story in there, more than one. The representative tends to go off on tangents, ones that Anakin sometimes finds interesting and sometimes just resigns himself to. Mostly, though, it goes well, and Obi-Wan... well, he's always been 'a nosy little bastard,' according to quite a few people.

(In his defense, the terms they'd used about Quinlan's 'investigative personality' had been quite a bit stronger.)

He eavesdrops to the end, and Anakin doesn't notice at all. Obi-Wan's not sure if he should try to address Anakin's lack of awareness of the world around him. He's not technically Anakin's master anymore. The comment may be taken as a criticism of his worth and capability, rather than a sincere desire to see his padawan not die.

He approaches the representative instead. He intends to introduce himself. Instead, the first words that tumble out of his mouth are:

"How do you do it?"

The man--older than he looks from a distance, more wrinkles than the bright hair would suggest, but not quite elderly yet--turns and lifts a brow. "Hm?"

"I'm sorry, I'm--" Obi-Wan grimaces. "I'm Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi. The young man you were just talking to is my former padawan, er, my former apprentice. I've been finding it harder and harder to speak with him over the past few years, and it seems that every interaction we have leads to an argument. How do you... manage that? I can't get him to listen to me at all."

"Ah, teenagers," the man sighs.

"He's twenty."

The representative pauses, and turns to him. "Are you the one he says raised him? The father?"

"Well... yes, I suppose that's one way to phrase it," Obi-Wan says, eyes darting to the side. He doesn't know how to explain the whole attachment situation to someone who barely knows what a Jedi is. He has even less of an idea of how to explain his own broken ability to speak of emotion, the parts of his mind that Bant clucks over and attributes to his own complicated relationship with Qui-Gon. "I had custody as his primary guardian from ages nine to nineteen and was the primary individual for handling his schooling, health, and general upbringing."

"That sounds to me like a very convoluted way of saying you were his father in all but name."

Obi-Wan grimaces. "I'm not exactly old enough to be his father, and I wasn't exactly the person he was supposed to learn from; I was the... back-up option."

"It seems he cares for you very much."

"He didn't have much of a choice," Obi-Wan says, with the kind of helpless smile and awkward shrug he's long gotten used to sharing with people when they ask. "And I assure you he'd have been happier with the man that was meant to teach him."

"I'd say that the 'would have' in this situation is much less important than what is," the representative says. Obi-Wan probably should have paid more attention to his name. "I wasn't in a position to define my relation to Allura or her father in the way that truly suited our situation, by... oh, tradition, social norms, public relations, take your pick. I was a very well-regarded official, of course, but I wasn't royalty, not even nobility, and I certainly wasn't wasn't legally or publicly part of the family. But for all the limitations there, I was still able to find ways to tell her and her family what they meant to me, and they in return. Your apprentice cares for you very much, and I'm sure you care back, but I'd hazard quite the guess that you've no idea how to tell him that."

"I... I shouldn't," Obi-Wan says. "I'm fond of him, of course, but I've no wish to smother him, and to simply say it would be undignified. I imagine he'd laugh in my face."

The representative raises one eyebrow and takes a sip of his drink.

"Master Kenobi," he says carefully. "Might I suggest you go find your young man, tell him you love him, and perhaps give him a hug?"

Obi-Wan's face flares red. It's been years since anyone short of Yoda has spoken to him like that.

"I'm not a child," he sniffs, trying to angle enough away that the blush isn't as noticeable. He's damnably prone to such things. "You're not that much older than me."

The man laughs, and Obi-Wan lifts his glass to his lips in a futile attempt to hid the embarrassment a little more. "Oh, not counting the stasis, I've well reached the age of six hundred and twenty-four, my boy!"

Obi-Wan chokes on his drink.

The man laughs a little more, but thumps him on the back until he's breathing normally again.

"Yes, most of the humans I've told have had quite the reaction!" the representative assures him. "But yes, even with the times adjusted to what any given local year is, I am significantly longer-lived than most species."

"No kidding," Obi-Wan manages. He wipes at his mouth with the back of his hand and looks over at the representative. He takes in the wrinkles and bright eyes, and says, "Well, I must say you look very well for a near-human of such an age. I can only name one person in that category that has managed better, and I haven't seen her since I was a child."

"I shall take that as the compliment it's intended to be," the representative says, twisting the edge of his mustache and beaming.

The man is... well, goofy, really, and quite a bit older than Obi-Wan had thought, but he's quite the charmer. Obi-Wan faintly compares him to a few different people in the back of his mind, but nothing quite fits. For all that the man is quite the jokester and--going by some things he'd seen from the corner of his eye in the main party--a master of physical comedy, the representative is actually more competent than he looks, and for all his visible age, not bad to look at. He is also, seemingly, an expert in dealing with teenagers and young adults, something Obi-Wan himself is... decidedly not.

He really should go speak with Anakin.

And there's a war to fight.

He doesn't really have much time, even with the recent lull.

He's in no place to be looking at the clean-shaven jaw and wondering what it would feel like under his lips, or to let himself consider whether this man would be the kind to have an hours-long discussion as to the narrative forms common in other galaxies, and whether they have anything paralleled to those in Obi-Wan's own, or if this man would show the same enthusiasm over teas that he'd shown over the hors d'oeuvres inside.

He should... really go find Anakin.

"I suppose it's time to find my padawan," he says, more to fill the air than anything. "Er... thank you, both for speaking with him, and for speaking with me."

"Not a problem at all, Master Kenobi!" the representative says, and Obi-Wan realizes that there's one last thing he may have... forgotten.

"This is terribly embarrassing, but I don't believe I caught your name?" Obi-Wan says.

"Coran Hieronymus Wimbleton Smythe, at your service!" the man says, with a sweeping bow. "As you can imagine, most simply call me Coran."

"Then I insist you call me Obi-Wan," he says, and before he can stop himself, "Might I bother you with an invitation to a shared tea time? You seem a knowledgeable fellow, and I'd appreciate the chance to... eh, pick your brain, shall we say."

It's not the smoothest come on he's ever put out there, or the most easily interpreted, but... well. Perhaps it's for the best. He's rather often found his tastes going in irresponsible directions, and it'll be much easier to brush this off without diplomatic incident if there's room for Coran to politely ignore the less platonic options.

Obi-Wan hopes he doesn't.

It's very selfish of him, but a dalliance with an older gentleman... well. He does, perhaps, make such irresponsible decisions, even now.

"I do believe I'd enjoy such a thing!" Coran enthuses, grabbing Obi-Wan's hand and shaking it in large, effusive movements.

Oh, this is a terrible idea, Obi-Wan thinks, even as he exchanges comm numbers and says goodbye.

Still.

He likes the idea of having at least a little fun, sedate or less so, while they have some time to themselves.

#Obi Wan Kenobi #Coran Smythe #Coran #coran hieronymus wimbleton smythe #anakin skywalker #Star Wars #Voltron #crossovers #Phoenix Posts #Phoenix Answers Asks #parenting

[moonlit-imagines]

Headcanons for being a Party Member

Stranger Kids x reader

warnings:

a/n: 💖💖 these ones were kind bad but i hope you like!

prompt: anonymous: “Hi! Can you make a headcannon for Stranger Things of just being in the party? Sorry if its too vague. Thank you so much for giving us so much free content!!”

you’ve known the boys for a long, long time

your mom was friends with joyce in high school, so you knew will your whole life

he introduced you to mike and soon lucas and dustin had joined the mix

let’s face it, you guys weren’t the most popular, but as long as you had each other it was fine

“at recess do you want to play castle?”

“yes! but we need to make up our characters”

will the wise was born that day, it just stuck

you guys were obsessed with star wars when it came out

“i’d totally be a jedi” -mike

“mike, you’d cry at the sight of any alien creature”

“not true!”

“i think lucas would be a kickass pilot, though”

“i’d get the princess, too” -lucas

dustin ended up playing lightsabers with you, though

you’ve accidentally knocked down tons of stuff in mike’s basement

“cut it out, you guys!”

“soooorryyyyy”

“you are not!”

AV club was just the 5 of you acting afool under adult supervision

mr. clark was still proud of your young minds, though

D&D campaigns, you were the rogue

you were also easily distracted during the game

“anyone want chips, im gonna get some chips”

“no! you can’t leave now!”

“watch me”

playing with mike’s toys while he’s not looking

battling them with lucas, dustin, and will

until mike started protesting

bike rides around town until sunset

SLEEPOVERS

“who the hell is snoring?”

“i think it’s dustin”

“PILLOW FIGHT!!!”

“kids, time to sleep!” -any parent

“let’s watch a scary movie”

“no! i mean—i’m tired” -mike

depending on which house you were staying in, you’d have a great time

will’s brother, jonathan, was always nice to you

nancy...not so much

“hi na—” *door slams* “oh...”

erica always intruded on your sleepovers at lucas’s

“i wanna play! can i play?”

“no, erica, go play somewhere else”

“you’re so mean, lucas”

“bye!”

dustin didn’t have any siblings, but he did have a cat who was pretty nice

“hi mews!”

the night will disappeared was a night you’ll never forget

you were so determined to find him, he had to be around somewhere

you ended up getting in deeper water than you’d originally thought when you met eleven, who apparently had superpowers

“mike!!! you’re mom is gonna kill you for bringing a random girl in the house”

“i know! shhhhh”

she was weird to say the least

and it was pretty scary sneaking around with her

“dude...she has the force”

“shut up!”

after a long week of fighting with your friends and encountering inter dimensional monsters and the government, you realized your life would never be the same

your mom was pretty protective over you for a while

the party had to come to your house instead for the next few months

“sorry guys, she’s just...really upset about the whole thing”

“it’s okay, y/n. we don’t mind”

being each other’s support system

especially when it came to will, he really worried you guys

“today is will’s doctor visit, hope it goes okay...”

spending HOURS in the arcade, struggling to beat other people’s high scores

“i’m gonna do it! i’m gonna get the top score!”

“in your dreams, y/n”

hAlLoWeEn

you knew you weren’t supposed to dress up at school but no one was paying attention to you when you told them

unfortunate.

there was a new girl who mike hated right off the bat

but lucas and dustin wouldn’t stop fighting over

“you two are the worst, you know that?”

trick or treating and dumping your candy later on to trade, the most effective way to get the best halloween

“nougat, disgusting. anybody want it? i’ll give it to you for free”

*dustin and you simultaneously* “ME!”

dustin’s “pet lizard” scaring the hell out of you

“dart makes me...uncomfortable”

max pulling you aside to ask why mike hates her

“uh...he’s a dick? i don’t know”

you and max ended up getting along pretty okay, though

she did complain about mike a LOT though

and when lucas filled her in on the demogorgon/upside-down/eleven situation, EVERYONE was pissed

you guys realized that the upside down stuff was not over and there was an epic teamup with all of you yaaaay

steve harrington adopted you it’s true

eleven came back

that was cool

you gave her a hug bc like duh??? you missed her

steve babysitting you guys and then getting beat up by max’s stepbrother, billy

“can i hit him? i wanna hit him”

“do it!”

doing dumbass shit in the tunnels that ended up working out anyways! yay!

“we’re all gonna die we’re all gonna die oh my god i’m too young to die”

“Y/N STOP”

in the end everything was (mostly) okay but like, that was scarring

summer rolled around and el and mike were dating, max and lucas were dating, and dusting came back from camp and claimed to be dating some girl from faaaar away

“liar”

“i’m not lying!”

steve sneaking you into movies

he also gave you (and only you) free ice cream but only bc he knew you wouldn’t tell anyone else

robin and you talking while you hid in the break room to eat your ice cream

“so...what do you do for fun”

“kill monsters”

“oh...okay”

kinda sick of the party’s shit for a while, so dustin and you were off scheming with the scoops employees

bad ideaaaa!! the russians!! you were almost killed!!

rescue mission for steve and robin

“they’re high as shit”

“nO YOu aRe”

“wonderful, we’re screwed”

losing them fhdhdhsh

“y/n?!”

“what? i’m not a babysitter!”

being chased by russians but also the rest of the party showing up and updating you but also adults finally making an appearance and you wanting to cry because like what the fuck is happening

being chased by the mind flayer

“GUYS IF WE DONT MAKE IT I WANT YOU ALL TO KNOW I LOVE YOU”

“Y/N. STOP SAYING THINGS THAT MAKE US THINK WE’RE GOING TO DIE”

eek that night sucked

you also almost fell down the hill that cerebro was placed on

and then uhhh hopper died so that was really bad and will ended up moving away with el and everyone was very sad

your mom cried when joyce left :(

you cried way too much

might i add going over to lucas’s to hang out with erica bc now you guys are friends lmaooo

“why are you here, y/n?”

“erica wanted me to come over”

“you two are impossible”

and to end this on a high note, the remaining party members in town were finally working through their differences as you all grew up and knew that it’d be impossible to separate for good

also pizza nights every week (sometimes accompanied by an older teen bc why not)

“if you guys eat all the damn pizza we’re gonna have a problem”

“we can’t help it! we’re growing!”

taglist: @locke-writes // @queenofthehairharrington // @praellee // @bonniesbabybunnie // @lotsoffandomrecs //

#stranger things #stranger things x reader #stranger things imagine #the party #the party x reader #the party imagine #mike wheeler imagine #will byers imagine #lucas sinclair imagine #dustin henderson imagine #eleven hopper imagine #max mayfield imagine #steve harrington imagine #robin buckley imagine #jonathan byers imagine

[blackkatmagic]

So Qui Gon can buy Anakin but the Jedi have no resource to save Shmi. Anakin missing her and dreaming her death is all his fault. Did anyone deny or lie to you about your birth mom? It is all on Anakin for missing his mom and being a society that will throw him out his ear for loving outside the rules. How kind did the Jedi deal with Ahsoka?

Qui-Gon didn’t buy Anakin. He had no money with which to do so. He made a bet with Watto, using Anakin’s podracer because that was the only currency he had, and Watto refused to include Shmi in it. Anakin dreaming her death is not his fault, but his choice to hide it and not address it and not ask for help, even when Obi-Wan was worried about him - which is a recurring part of his character, and part of his downfall - does needlessly complicate things.

And like. My dude. The Jedi Order isn’t a cult. People are allowed to leave, and are still honored when they do. Anakin could have left the Order, married Padme openly, and had a family. I honestly do not get why it is so bad that a religious order has certain tenants, one of which is be mindful of your emotions and don’t try to possess people. And yeah, if you break the tenants of that Order, maybe you should leave it, because clearly you don’t agree with its principles and it’s not working for you. Obviously, the Order has worked for hundreds of thousands of Jedi; the fact that it’s not working for Anakin is not a failing on the Order’s part, it’s a mutual disconnect between Anakin and the Order, and not one they would actively punish. Eeth Koth, a Council member, leaves the Order over philosophical differences and later gets married. It’s not this groundbreaking taboo or something that Anakin falls in love. It’s not even uncommon. 

As for Ahsoka and the Temple bombing, the Order was operating as best they could with the knowledge they had, and they apologized in the aftermath. Like. Idk if you expect perfection from a governing body of people in the middle of a war, but, uh. If that’s the case I have some bad news for you. They’re people. They’re flawed and make mistakes and do their best. And if that interpretation of the Jedi doesn’t jive with you, this probably isn’t the best blog to spend your time on. 

#Anonymous #kat answers

[wonderlandleighleigh]

98 Thoughts while watching A New Hope

1. Who was that silver protocol droid? What happened to them? Are they okay? where are they now?? I bet they’re cooler than 3P0.

2. Rebel helmets are just silly.

3. I love how dirty R2 and 3P0 are. 

4. Man, Rex is right. Empire-era Stormtrooper armor is total shit.

5. Shut up Anakin.

6. Oh Space Mom. I will miss Carrie Fisher forever. 

7. Anakin fucking - he asks a question just as he kills the dude. Like- why-? Shut up Anakin.

8. Something I really love about this first movie is that Leia doesn’t do anything overtly sexily. When she gets shot, she’s literally just laid out on the floor, on her belly. It’s not meant to be hot. And even later when she’s tortured, it’s not meant to be a male gaze thing.

9. For fuck’s sake Anakin. Your daughter is standing right fucking there, and you can’t even sense it. What a dumb. 

10. R2 is like “Fuck. This place again?”  But 3P0 was created on Tatooine and he doesn’t even remember. That’s kinda sad. 

11. As Dettiot says, you can really tell that 3P0 was created by a 9 year old Anakin. Yeesh.

12. I really love the Jawas. They’re so strange, and wonderful. 

13. I wonder what R2 was thinking about when he was walking all that time by himself on Tatooine. Was he thinking about Anakin? Was he thinking about the war? Or Padme? Or Ahsoka? 

14. Man, Tatooine at dusk is beautiful, isn’t it?

15. These Stormtroopers have sand on their butts. I never noticed. 

16. I remember thinking the Jawa going “bobit! bobit!” was very funny as a kid.

17. Beru Whitesun. Former slaver liberator. Secret bad-ass. She and Owen really deserved better. 

18. R2: I cannot believe my old master’s son is leaving me the fuck behind. What the fuck is this shit. Get back here. Do you know how much I suffered for your dumb dad? 

19. Luke playing with toy ships just like Anakin did. And didn’t Obi-Wan make some of those in one continuity or another? *sad* 

20. R2: ANOTHER SKYWALKER OH GOD. 

21. SHE IS YOUR SISTER. Do NOT falling in love with your SISTER.

22. R2′s memory has never been wiped. Aside from Leia’s message, gold only knows what other recordings are saved on his hard drive. 

23. Blue milk! 

24. And Owen lying his ass of to Luke. Ugh.

25. I remember as a kid thinking that Owen was too grumpy/mean. But he’s a really good person. He raised this kid, and wants nothing more than to do right by him. Done so dirty. 

26. But Luke’s pensive moment watching the suns set is so beautiful.

27. I desperately want to know how Beru’s cooker works. I want one. It looks so cool. 

28. I want a Bantha. 

29. R2 trying to wake Luke up is such a moment. 

30. Obi-Wan’s krate dragon impersonation is amazing. I wish he’d do it more often.

31. I have feelings about his old, dusty Jedi robes.  In fact, everytthing about old Ben gives me feelings. He lost everything, and has been hiding in the desert for twenty years. 

32. “He’s searching for his former master. I’ve never seen so much devotion in a droid before.” Obi-Wan’s face is so haunted in this moment. Fuck.

33. R2: WHY YOU PLAYING YOU KNOW ME! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU

34. Owen told Luke his father sold drugs. The. Fuck.

35. “He was the best star pilot. And a cunning warrior. And he was a good friend.” *sads* 

36. Obi-Wan sat in the desert with his brother’s lightsaber for twenty years, just mourning everything that had happened. Fuck. 

37. Obi-Wan stop LYING. 

38. Obi-Wan’s face clearly says, while Leia’s recording plays, “Oh shit. All this crap is catching up to me. Again. I’ll never ever be rid of Skywalkers.” 

39. Obi-Wan has such terrible ideas. Still.

40. I just love that Vader hates the Death Star. Anakin hates the Death Star the way Steve Rogers hates Stark Tower. 

41. Aaaand bye-bye senate. I wonder if that will happen here in the US at some point if Trump keeps Trumping along.

42. Tarken and Vader’s bromance is such a thing.

43. Ha! “accurate.” “precise.” Stormtroopers. Ha. 

44. Owen and Beru’s fate is so gruesome. I was always so shocked by how much we were shown. Damn. Grim. And again, done so dirty. More Skywalker adjacent family dead. 

45. Shut up, Anakin.

46. More grim shit. Burning the Jawa bodies. 

47. Poor Luke. He lost everything that day. He thought his father and mother were both dead, and now his uncle and aunt are truly dead. So yeah. Following a weird wizard on a quest. 

48. Mos Eisley doesn’t seem dangerous. Just goofy. 

49. Alec Guinness’  delivery of the Jedi mind trick is so casual. So sly. Love it.

50. CHEWBACCA! WHAT A WOOKIE! 

51. Why does everybody hate droids??? 

52. omg. Luke tugging on the bartender’s shirt. Wtf Luke. Just say “Excuse me.” That’s so rude.

53. Obi-Wan just slicing off that dude’s arm...a little reactionary maybe? AND NOBODY DOES OR SAYS ANYTHING. 

54. Obi-Wan is so unimpressed by Han. omg.

55. Obi-Wan is just gonna hit up Bail and Breja for cash when they get to Alderaan. Dang. 

56. “I’m never coming back to this planet again.” heh.

57. Han shot first. Fuck all of this.

58. You know why her resistance to the mind probe is considerable? BECAUSE SHE IS YOUR DAUGHTER YOU DUMB ROBOT MAN. 

59. CGI Jabba is weak sauce.

60. “Even I get boarded sometimes” is the name of Han Solo’s sex tape. 

61. Luke’s poncho is so cute.

62. Leia is the best. 

63. Tarken is wearing comfy slippers.

64. The reason why even if Vader made amends with Luke, Leia will never forgive him, is right here. Not only did he torture her, but he stood back and watched while they destroyed her home. She will never be able to forgive him. Ever. And that’s legit. She doesn’t have to. 

65. I believe Chewie actually does beat someone with their own arm.

66. Obi-Wan’s smile when Han says there’s no mystical Force controlling his destiny was so good.

67. Even when there’s nobody else in the room, Vader doesn’t get to sit down. What the fuck.

68. Obi-Wan knows he’s gonna die.

69. Mark Hamill talks so fast.

(I accidentally took a nap during Leia’s rescue and the trash compactor scene. I was tired, and I’ve seen this movie so many times)

70.  Han screaming after the Stormtroopers is such a fucking mood.

71. Vader vs. Obi-Wan here...I have a lot of feelings about these two disasters fighting agai- SHUT UP ANAKIN.

72. Not only does Obi-Wan sacrifice himself to give Luke an exit, but he does so because he’s giving Anakin a choice in terms of killing him or not. He’s giving him a moment of grace here, I think. To not be an evil fuck. But uh...Vader.

73. When Obi-Wan says “You can’t win.” He’s not talking about the duel. He’s talking about over-all. Being a Sith means that he can’t win. And his “If you strike me down, I’ll become more powerful than you can possibly imagine” refers to the amount of guilt and shame Anakin will feel in killing his brother. That that will eat at his soul. And it does.

74. Vader stepping on the robes to make sure Obi-Wan is dead is hilarious in such a weird morbid way.

74. In a weird flip, Vader now has Obi-Wan lightsaber, as Obi-Wan had Anakin’s. 

75. Poor Luke. Owen, Beru and Obi-Wan all in one day. 

76. 1st person shooter time! 

77. Oh Han and Leia. My first fucking ship. So fighty. So sexy. I love them.

78. Stop flirting badly with your sister Luke.

79. ...who is Luke jealous of here? 

80. I love the HC that Vader knew about the weakness in the Death Star, and hated that fucking thing so much he never mentioned it. 

81. R2 back in starfighter with a Skywalker.

82. I swear Red Leader looks like Don Knotts. 

83. I love X-Wings so much.

84. Vader’s reflexes behind the controls of a starfighter must be fucked compared to what they were pre-Mustafar. 

85. Luke watching all these people die like “Ooh. I guess this is what Han was talking about.” 

86. Oh Tarkin. You gonna regret everything in a couple minutes. 

87. Biggs’ mustache is majestic.

88. Luke saves Wedge’s life by telling him to get the fuck out. Later, Wedge will likely sing “Empty Chairs at Empty Tables.” 

89. The targeting system feels so old-timey. 

90. Obi-Wan you trained him for like 20 minutes. He doesn’t know what he’s doin- okay.

91. ANAKIN! HOw dare yOu ShoOT R2! 

92. Good job Han. <3 I actually really love Han a lot. He’s not a smart man, but he’s a pretty good man. 

93. The Death Star is destroyed, Tarkin dies, and Vader goes spinning off into space. Some fics have him traveling through time! 

94. The original trio is so pure in this movie. I love them so much. The sequels did all three of them so dirty. 

95. Leia’s necklace is so good.

96. And Luke’s Jacket is so bad. I’ve seen photos of it replaced by a brown jacket and it is so much better. 

97. Remember everybody. Rex is at the ceremony somewhere, watching a Skywalker get a medal. 

98. I love this fucking movie. 

#star wars #a new hope #thinking about star wars

[disregardcanon]

a few thoughts on the phantom menace after my first adult rewatch 

1. this movie is fun. i can’t stress enough that it’s just enjoyable to watch if you’ve taken off your “prequels bad” goggles. ten year old me was right 

2. i always loved qui-gon, and i like the way that you can see his influence in obi-wan. while he’s an unconventional jedi who does things “his own way” and has not been offered a council position because of this, he still fits within the rules enough that he... you know... doesn’t make big waves. maybe in the council and the order, but not outside of it. 

if anakin weren’t force sensitive, i’m sure that he would have felt bad leaving him as a slave on the desert planet, but it seems like he would have accepted it as one of those things that he can’t change. 

he’s also kind of a dick. while he’s clever and kind enough to figure out how to spare jar-jar from whatever punishment awaited him, he was also insanely condescending towards him and like, just kinda continues to be. also, his flip-flopping on whether or not obi-wan is ready to be a full jedi seems natural of a parent who’s not quite ready to let go of their child until he absolutely has to (or has found something that needs his attention more right now) which is an interesting trait. i think that it’s really cool that he’s not just Cool Jedi Man but also, like, has flaws. maybe they’re not addressed overtly in the narrative, but i’m here, looking at them through my critical adult eyes. 

3. i don’t think i actually picked up on the fact that palpatine orchestrated this as a plot to become chancellor as a kid, but like. wow. the ear whispering. the posturing. the controlling both sides. the sheer SHEEVERY of it all. what an absolute dickwad. i love that manipulative jackass. had his own planet invaded so that he could manipulate his young queen into getting him a promotion. 

4. i thought it did a really good job of establishing place. while tatooine is a place we already knew and they didn’t have to do much to establish what it was like beyond There Are Slaves Too and PODRACING, naboo and coruscant were both more complicated, but they spent the time with both of them for us to get a feel for what their geography and architecture was like, along with some of naboo and senate politics.

5. the gungan situation is interesting, but the made up dialect and jar-jar being... jar-jar... are still issues for me. i think that they drive the movie down, despite the interesting aspect of the politics between the two peoples and them coming together 

6. however, the gungan architecture was GORGEOUS and the sequences underwater were all enthralling. add this to coruscant, the senate room, all of naboo’s overworld (with it’s gorgeous architecture that hints at, you know, colonialism) and the really cool way the podracing was set up, this did some really great visual things. 

7. costumes! i wouldn’t say that anyone outside of naboo had really interesting costumes, but of course the naboo have their super interesting, stylized look. not all of the queen’s outfits are hits, but they sure are loud and bold 

8. i’m mostly impressed with anakin’s actor, actually. he plays well off of shmi and qui-gon, who both had great parent chemistry with him. i almost cried when i saw how hard it was on shmi to let him go. 

his apprehension and nerves in front of the council really made me feel like he was scared. his interactions with padme are the least believable because of bad dialogue and them just. not really knowing how to play it because they were supposed to hint that they would eventually be The Couple but anakin’s actor clearly did not know how to play a crush and natalie portman was like. uh, i wanna pinch his cheeks? i guess? 

i also thought that some of the cutesy dialogue while anakin was off shooting in space was meh, but like. if we’re leaning into it go all out. it wasn’t BAD, just kinda campy. 

9. the qui-gon, obi-wan, maul fight was well choreographed, and i think that it shows obi-wan’s moment of almost turning very well. then him cradling qui-gon and having his master’s dying wish be for him to train anakin, who he was a little wary of and you can tell also a little resentful of for getting so much of qui-gon’s attention is really interesting. 

10. however, i don’t think that the complicated feelings of obi-wan being forced to care for a child that he wasn’t completely on board with having that his master was going to kind of abandon him over were ever really brought up again in the narrative, like, even the clone wars. which is a crying shame. 

anakin and obi-wan were clearly not comfortable with each other when obi-wan became his master, and while obi-wan lost his only parental figure, anakin lost both a budding parental figure and had recently been ripped away from his mother, and neither of them are really prepared for this new relationship. 

what i’m saying is that obi-wan and anakin’s relationship is COMPLICATED and not entirely pretty, and i wish that had been explored more. 

11. i still think that naboo electing queens and then having that queen be fourteen years old is dumb. the handmaidens thing is badass though and i wish we had gotten more of that. also, my favorite padme moments are either when she’s doing the politics or telling qui-gon that the queen won’t like this and him going “well, the queen doesn’t have to know” and her pouting about it. 

12. i’m not really bothered by the midichlorians thing. i dunno, i think it’s a cool explanation that works to explain them knowing that anakin has So Much Force

13. as an adult who has experienced bureaucracy, i can now say that yeah, the jedi council actually WOULD have said that there’s no way this nine year old could become a jedi. they would say that it’s just not done and that they refuse to try to make an exception for him, and that he already has too many attachments and cannot properly become One Of Us. 

they also would assume that him being a scared kid who misses his mom is both 1. his fault and 2. proof that he’s going to turn to the dark side, which somehow is his fault as a scared nine year old.  anakin skywalker deserves better and there are many issues with the jedi order, but the issues are realistic. 

14. i’m watching the rest of the movies over the next few days, and i’m interested to see how i feel about attack of the clones. i watched rots a few years ago, but attack of the clones has been at least five years back and i think i was on my laptop for it. 

#the prequels #tpm #sarah watches the prequels #sarah watches star wars

[pokecatt]

CWATS: Their Ad'ika

It was seven years since Agne left with her child Verra. The time they spent on the planet Konia was filled with fun and stories about the force and the clonewars.

He had removed his chip three years after the war. Though Med have never gone there himself, he sometimes send gifs though the assistance of Lema Syks. He fears that if he does go, the Empire would follow.

"Why don't daddy ever visit us?" Young Verra asked.

"Because of the bad empire that would follow if he ever come out of hiding." Agne replied.

"But aunty Lema gets to come over and they haven't followed her."

"She is magical like me, it helps her sneak away from the empire." Everyone on Konia calls the force magic and she ended up calling it that too.

"Oh I see, that makes sense I guess."

"It's getting late, better get ready for bed."

"Okay momma."

--------

On Nar-Shaddaa, Med runs a free med center in secret. He and his brother Doc are the only clones running the place. If word get out about it, the Hutts would likely empose taxes and control. The kindly donations from happy neighbors are the only thing that keeps them going.

Med gets on the rooftop of their building. The view is clouded by the pollution, but he can faintly spot the stars at night. When it got dark enough, he scans the sky. The star he looks for is for the planet Kamino. He misses the place where he was made. But also, he would wonder what star Konia belongs to. He knows that It's not on any map, far away from here. But it's fun to at least try.

"There you are Med, we kinda need your help down here." Doc interrupts the moment.

"Be down there in a bit Doc."

--------

Verra and her friend Ivran Jr play in the garden around the shuttle craft that she calls home. The ship hasn't moved since they landed years ago. Carefully parked near the tall trees with vines reaching near the top. The republic cog paint job on the top wing is faded and chipping away.

Ivran Jr isn't quite like his siblings, though his older sister Jane comes close but she is more judgemental than him. Verra on the other hand just clicks. They're like two peas in a pod.

"My mom said that I have potential to be a sourceror." Jr said to Verra.

"What is a sourceror anyway? Aren't they like Wizards or something?"

"Uhh, I think they tend to focus on the nature of magic."

"That sounds like my mom."

"Maybe she can teach me something sometime."

"Yeah, that would be great."

--------

"Can you teach me what you know about Jedi magic?" Ivran Jr approach Agne with a curious question. Though shy in nature, he managed to gather the nerve to ask.

Agne was in the veggie garden watering the plants. "You must have heard of that from Verra."

"Uh, yes, I want to know about everything magical." He was a little surprised that she would know. But maybe it was the magic he reasoned.

"Well, what do you know already?" She is already finished with the watering and walks to him.

"I have studied alot on elemental mancery, and able to cast the basic magical spells." Normally, he would be shaking if she was a stranger, but having been with friends with Verra all of his life made Agne an aunt to him.

"Does your parents know what you are getting into?" She stand in front of him.

"Yes and no, you see. They already know about your magic. But, I uh, haven't told them about me being your student. " Ivran is getting a bit nervous talking. But Agne sensed it.

"It's okay, I'll ask them for you and maybe even show them something. But before you go, why not have some cherriapples here."

After finishing his cherriapples, he meets with Verra. Giving her some of the fruit too.

"Hey Ivran, what did my mom say?"

"That she is going to ask my parents about it later. But I think that they will."

"Cool, it will be awesome to have you be my mom's padawan. And then you can be a Jedi and I will be your trooper. And together we can defeat the empire!"

"Oh yeah!"

--------

After discussing with Ivran's parents, Orick and Feana Silver, they accept Agne's offer.

"Are you sure it's ok, the training is serious."

"He has great magical potential, I think that it would be good for him to study under you." Feana said thinking about how great it would make the family be. She was always looking for great things for her children. But it was always their choice first, she would never push them into things that they don't want.

And so, Agne took Ivran under her wing. While teaching him how to focus on the force, she also trained Verra how to fight like a trooper. It was a promise to Med to teach her. She was given a blaster gun from the 301st, one of the few things that they have from the clones they have.

"Now focus on the stone, and lift it up."

Ivran sat down and for a moment concentrates on the stone, it moves a bit and  then he looses focus.

"Keep trying, you can do with practice. Now let's see how our trooper is doing."

Verra is out in the field practicing her aim with her blaster. They have some targets set up across the field and about half of them are hit.

"You've improved since last time, your dad would be proud." Agne came with Ivran to see her.

"Some day we will be ready for the empire!" Verra said excited.

"Now Verra, don't get too excited about fighting them. You will lose yourself and get captured."

"How will we know when we are ready for them?"

"You will know when you are ready, but for now we should continue your training."

--------

"Lema, you made it back."

"Aunty Lema!" Verra is glad to see her back.

"Your father send you this." She hands Verra a gift.

"Really? Yay!" She opens the box and she finds a little toy clone trooper. "Alright! I have always wanted one!"

"It took him a while to find one, I don't think they make them anymore."

Verra is so happy, she runs off to play with her new toy.

"So Lema, what have you heard about the empire?" Agne asked.

"They are running the galaxy with an iron fist out there. They are looking for people to replace the clones with their stormtroopers."

"Oh my, how is Med doing out there?"

"He still runs the med center, but he also worries."

"Some things never changes."

"What are we gonna do?"

"I don't know, but we are going to be ready for them in case they find us."

#cwacrossthestars #clonewars #CWATS #fanfiction

[pulpwriterx]

RESURRECTION: CHAPTER 4- A GAME OF THRONES

Links to previous chapters

Chapter Three

Chapter Two

Chapter One

CHAPTER 5: A GAME OF THRONES

(Author’s Note: Not a crossover. Title based on an observation Ben Solo makes about Skywalkers and the Galaxy)

When Leia sat up with a start, freeing herself from a heavy white sheet, she knew Ben must be alive.

She walked into a huge celebration of victory that she was distracted from only by her thoughts of him.

It also became a celebration that the reports of the General’s death had been greatly exaggerated.

In the midst of all of it, Leia kept looking for Chewie.

When he picked her up in a big Wookiee bear hug, howling for joy, she knew she was really alive.

And she felt better knowing he was there with her.

“Ben did this, Chewie. I’m alive because Ben is alive. We have to find him?”

Chewie cocked his head to the side, questioningly.

“Why? Because I need to know what he’s up to.”

***

More than anyone else could be, Leia was sure that her son was up to something.

Leia heard Rey’s heartbreaking story about Ben’s passing, and the poor girl cried and cried in her arms.

She tried to tell Rey that if she was alive that meant Ben was, too, but Rey was adamant.

She had seen him die.

Most people thought Rey's story about Ben’s alleged passing was romantic.

Not Leia.

What was it that Arkanian pain in the ass Armitage Hux often said about her son?

Leia ruefully remembered.

The man originally known as Ben Solo is an amoral, charismatic merchant of dreams. If you want your dreams he will sell them to you. Or if you prefer your nightmares you can have those, too.

She had been trying, for the past decade and change, to remember the Ben she knew.

Ben had been a sweet, kind, funny, little boy.

He had a goofy smile, and a ready laugh and she really didn’t see where Han got that whole dark, ancient eyes thing.

He was quirky, and weird, but in an endearing way, and she found lovable in his gangly awkwardness.

But even as a child he had a dark side, all you had to do was ask the boys who bullied him, and they would tell you through pulped noses and broken teeth why they had stopped.

He had moods, and Leia suspected that Ben also had mystical visions.

But it was only when he reached his terrible teens that things began to go downhill.

Ben Solo had left the Jedi Temple, twice, to pursue his father’s vocation, and he had excelled at being a ruthless pirate.

The second time, he was suspended for breaking his vow of chastity, multiple times, with the equally black-hearted daughter of an Arkanian warlord.

Hux, her Force null cousin, had been sent to keep her out of trouble.

He failed.

At the meeting with his Master, Ben had listened to everything Luke said, and then replied?

“Well, Uncle Luke, you’d better kick me out, then, because after being a virgin for twenty years, all I want out of life is Hela Darkstar's gorgeous ginger cunt. You can’t convince me that hokey religions and ancient weapons are better than fucking. Nothing is better than fucking. Except maybe crushing your enemies, having them driven before you, and hearing the lamentations of their kinsmen. Can I go back to space, now?”

Han was so proud.

Leia had been appalled.

After he had dismissed Ben, Han and Luke had laughed over what Ben had said for about fifteen minutes, but Leia didn’t see the humor in it, or the fact that Ben was going back to Anchorhead with his father as soon as Han could stop expressing his relief that Ben had finally got a girlfriend.

At the time, she had though that a pirate’s life was the worst thing that could happen to him, and she made Han send him back to Luke after Ben’s suspension was over.

The third time was the charm on that one.

In hindsight, it would have been better to let him go back to space with his father, and stay there.

But Ben had that option.

After Luke had tried to behead him, Ben could have left, found his father, went back to space and never had anything to do with the Jedi, or the Sith, again.

But, and unlike his Uncle, Ben wanted to play the game of thrones with his mother.

She was willing to make a place for him in the governing of the Galaxy, in time, and with maturity, but Ben Solo didn’t want to wait for his piece of pie.

So he became Kylo Ren, and threw in his lot with the Sith.

That was only his first move.

And killing Snoke was his third.

Leia believed that Ben really was in love with Rey, but it was awfully expedient for his purposes for that to have happened.

That was his second move.

But a funny thing happened as he shed Kylo Ren, the mask Ben Solo wore, on his way to become Ben Solo, Hero of the Resistance.

To kill the badguys, win the day, and get the girl.

He died.

But that was only a temporary setback for a Skywalker.

Skywalkers had many death and many births, and lived many lives, in-between.

Ben’s hunger for his victory, and the spoils of it, and for Rey were intense enough to bring him back from the other side, and her with him.

That meant his power was growing; that he was almost as strong in the Force as she was.

No, it wasn't romantic.

How had Ben managed to court Rey, and win her love when they were enemies, and all their encounters ended just short of murder?

It was something, the bond between Rey Palpatine and Ben Solo, but romantic wasn’t the word that came to Leia’s mind.

Terrifying was more like it.

She knew that Ben would come for Rey, and now that the man she loved was Ben Solo and not Kylo Ren, Rey would welcome him with open arms.

Leia was glad that Ben had returned to the light, and that he was alive, but she was still worried.

Hela Darkstar seemed to be out of the picture, but Leia had thought that in the past.

Ben was more sentimental about his women than his father had been; Hela was bound to take a part in Ben’s story again, sometime.

That and Leia knew that Kylo Ren was the mask that Ben Solo wore, and she suspected that Ren had been a means to the end of becoming the Galactic hero Ben Solo now was.

Galactic heroes often end up becoming galactic rulers.

Leia found would be happy going back to the Solo empire on the Outer Rim, to be a Pirate King.

It was, she knew, the best thing for him, and not the worst.

Still she remembered what he had said to her on the remains of the Death Star, as he thought he lay dying.

Don’t think I’m going anywhere, General. I know the game we play in this Galaxy. It’s all a game of thrones. And if you’re not a Skywalker? You don’t get to sit on the throne.

And as for Rey?

Leia could have told her about all the things she was going to discover, good and bad, if she went off with Ben.

But when she had been about Rey's age and Han had been about Ben’s age?

Leia knew she wouldn’t have listened, either.

That night, Leia’s rival had heralded his arrival with the presence in the infirmary of a 5 man squad  suffering from various scrapes, contusions, scratches, shiners, fat lips, bloody noses and even a nasty human bite.

They had snuck up on a really big guy while he was pissing on a rock in a deep cave on Exegol. A man the size and breadth of a short Wookiee, and he must have thought they were attacking him, because he fought back so fiercely they let him have an X-Wing.

These were compounded by reports of a barefoot naked man in a blast helmet wandering around camp, looking for something.

What did that mean?

That Ben was back in the game and he didn’t need a weapon, or even pants, t play it?

The last report came from Finn and Poe, who burst in to the command tent without knocking.

“General! There’s some man in Rey's tent and he’s assaulting her like a raging Wookiee! You can hear her screaming all over the place! And he won’t let me save her!” Finn told her

“She doesn’t need saving! He’s full of shit, General. Finn's just jealous because it’s not him in Rey’s tent. Did you know Ben was with Rey?”

“My son, Ben? How do you know it’s him?”

“I recognize his voice. We, uh, I worked with him and Han. Before the war.”

“That guy is still a fucking animal! You wouldn’t believe the stuff he's screaming at the top of his lungs! I think we should check on Rey, General. Make sure she’s OK.” Finn insisted.

“Yes, I would believe it. Alright, Finn. If you really think Rey is in trouble? We'll go find out.”

It was just conceivable that Finn might be right, and Poe might be wrong.

Call him Kylo or call him Ben, Leia suspected that to get what he wanted, her ruthless pirate son was capable of goddamn anything.

Rey was the brightest light in the Galaxy, the only Jedi of her generation.

Claiming her just might be Ben’s next move.

***

Ben just laughed, and turned his head, sparing his mother having to see the face he made when he shot his wad.

Deeply embarrassed, Leia slammed the door shut and locked it.

Ben was still laughing.

It made her think of a time when Ben was about seven or eight, and Han hadn’t locked their bedroom door, and Ben had walked in without knocking.

And caught them in the act.

“DAD! This is so gross! Cantcha take Mom someplace else to do that? I live here!”

“So do we, kid! Get out of this room and lock that door, Ben! You know you’re not allowed to just walk in here without knocking!”

“It’s still gross.” Ben said, and left.

Locking the door before he shut it.

Han had neither been ashamed or missed a stroke.

And he saw no reason for them to stop, either.

Ben had just put the radio on, and later, when Leia was too deeply embarrassed to breathe, Han had put his pants on and gone out and made Ben’s lunch.

“Dad, did you do something weird to Mom? How come she’s hiding in your bedroom?”

“Most people get embarrassed about shit like that, kiddo.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know. Eat your lunch.”

It didn’t bother either of them.

Born without shame.

For the first time since she had realised he was alive, no, for the first time in a decade and change, Leia began to think of Ben as her son, only.

Not an opponent, or a rival.

Not as an enemy, or a symbol.

As her son, Ben.

He knew she would be embarrassed, so even though he thought it was funny, he turned his head and laughed.

What am I going to do with him? How can I just be his mother, now? All those scars, holy mother Force, what did they do to him? 

Is there anything left of the boy I knew, in that man I just saw?

“Is she OK?” Poe demanded.

“What about the raging Wookiee?” Finn demanded.

Leia smacked their heads together.

“Idiots! Do you think I wanted to see that? Do you think I raised a rapist? An animal? A monster? Rey is fine. She looked very happy. It’s just that she has a boyfriend, Finn, and it’s not you.” Leia snapped

“Rey has two boyfriends, and neither of them are me.” Finn said.

“Yeah, but I know Ben. He won’t care about me. You? He’d cut your head off.” Poe explained

“I talked to him. It was definitely Ben Solo. He didn’t threaten to cut my head off.” Finn said.

“Because he probably figures it’s me, not you. Rey’s into flyboys. What can I say? Was it really Ben, General?”

“Not that it’s any of your business, Poe, but yes. It was. He wasn’t embarrassed, because Ben has no shame. Solo family trait. But I am very embarrassed. So, from now on? You boys just  mind your own business.”

The General began to walk away.

“That makes sense. If Rey is Ben’s girl, that's why he killed Snoke and they killed all his guards.” Poe said

“But Rey killed Kylo Ren.” Finn added

“Rey killed Palpatine. Ben probably killed all the Knights of Ren to get to Kylo Ren, and killed him to avenge Han.” Poe explained

“He told me the Sith held him in detention for three years and tried to break him.” Finn expanded

“That was a mistake. You cross Ben Solo? You die.” Poe reminded Finn.

Rey’s door opened.

She shut it.

Leia turned around.

She was frozen to the spot

“Ben, put these on.”

“I don’t want to wear those, I hate underwear!”

“Just put them on. To go out. You’re naked!”

“Okay, okay.”

The door opened and Ben stepped out.

He looked like he’d just made the Kessel Run on foot.

He brushed his sweaty hair out of his face.

Poe started applauding him, and Ben grinned.

“She made me work for it.” He said.

“Always does.” Poe agreed.

“Oh, so it’s you. That’s OK, Poe. Because I know you. So tell me, Tiesdays and Thursdays only, right?”

“Right, Ben. You think I want to die?”

“I know you don’t. This way, we’re keeping it in the family. But any of these other guys? We kill him.”

“Immediately.

Poe and Ben both laughed.

Ben sat by Rey’s campfire, and started poking the embers with a stick.

“What, Mom? I’m beat. I have to get some sleep.”

What Mom.

That was all he had to say?

The last time she had seen her son in person he was a boy of 23, still a little soft around the edges

Now he was a grown man, 35 years old, hard, and scarred, the tough guy his father had always wanted him to be.

But he still had her little Ben’s sweet, goofy smile.

And after all these years?

What, Mom?

“Can you try to be a little quieter, in there?”

“Sorry. I got carried away in the moment.”

Ben poked the fire.

He looked at his feet.

Then he looked up at his mother, again.

“Well, here I am. I came home. Like you wanted. Now what?” he asked.

“There’s so many things I want to say to you, Ben. Is that all you have to say to me? Here you are? Now what?” Leia demanded.

“I did a pretty good job, didn’t I? I mean, it’s over now. Maybe too many people got killed. And I killed too many of them. But I ended it. If I didn’t do what I did, , it never would have ended. Somebody had to do it. That somebody could only have been me.” Ben said.

“Ben, I don’t want to talk about religion and politics. What are you going to do with your life, now? Are you OK? Really OK?”

“I think I’ll be OK. With time. And I’m just going to go back to work. I still have the ship. And the place in Anchorhead. I’ve got money stashed. I’ll be fine, Mom. Really.”

He seemed like he really needed to hear her praise him.

“The Galaxy owes you and Rey a great debt. You did a pretty good job, Ben. But this isn’t all is forgiven and everything is fine. It can’t be.”

“I am not going back to jail. You might as well just kill me.”

“I said this wasn’t about politics. In the morning? We need to talk. And none of your bullshit stories, or I will pull the truth out of your head. I’ll be back at 9. Have clothes on.”

“Okay. Can I go lie down before I fall down?”

“You had better. I'll see you in the morning, Benjamin.”

***

Morning broke.

Ben snored.

Rey woke up.

Ben rolled over.

And snored.

“Ben. Wake up. Your mother will be here, soon. She was very sick.”

“Bullshit. Skywalkers don’t die. He'll be back too. Many deaths, many lives. Skywalkers come back.”

“What?”

Ben sat up.

“She fooled you, huh? It’s alright. She fools everybody. I know better. My mother is the most powerful living Force sensitive being in the Galaxy. I have only begun to sense the contours of the universes that she commands. It’s a game, Rey. A game of thrones. And if you’re not a Skywalker? You don’t get to sit on the throne. But I’m not ready to be the King. Let her have the Galaxy. For now. That’s what she wants to know about. And if I were her? I’d be worried about me, too.”

“But Ben, the General is your mother.”

“Yeah. But did she hug me? Did she cry? I had to drag it out of her to say I did a good thing for the Galaxy. She doesn’t trust me. She can’t. She’s not my Mom, anymore. I’ll always be the enemy to her.”

Ben’s voice quavered.

He stood up, stretched, and sat on the stool she had made to put his socks on.

Rey noticed his left ankle was bruised and his foot was swollen up.

“Ah, shit. Sprained my ankle. That’s why it hurt to walk on it. Probably when those guys were chasing me. Now I can’t even escape before she gets here.”

Then he put one boot, and  the coveralls.

“I like the beard, Ben.” Rey told him.

It was a lame thing to say, but she couldn’t think of anything else.

“Disguise.” he replied.

“You have to give your mother time, Ben. It took me years to allow myself to love you. And to trust you. And I still almost killed you when you crushed the Sith wayfinder.”

“That didn’t go the way I pictured it. I thought you’d fall into my arms when I told you the only way you were going to Exegol was with me.”

“Well, maybe you’re wrong about your mother, too. Maybe she didn’t want to hug you because you were all sweaty and covered in come and squirt.”

Rey had insisted they wash up in the stream before getting back into her bed. 

That made Ben laugh.

At 9, his mother and Chewbacca both came to Rey’s tent.

Ben was sitting on one of the stools Rey had made.

When Chewbacca walked in Rey sensed an emotion in Ben she didn’t think he had.

Shame.

Ben bowed his head, and rounded his shoulders, making himself look smaller.

He made a mournful sound that Rey didn’t think could have come from a human throat.

Chewbacca chastised him, angrily.

Ben made the same mournful sound.

Chewie was so sad and so angry that Rey couldn’t even understand him.

Finally she understood Chewbacca ordering “Kallaurra” to lift up his head.

Ben was crying.

Real tears.

“I’m sorry.  I can live with everything else I did. But not what I did to the Old Man. It’s horrible. Worse than just killing him. I’m not even sure if he’s alive or dead. He might not be dead, Chewie. At least I don’t think he is.”

“Your father, Ben?” Leia asked.

Leia had been up all night.

Crying because she had her son back.

Crying because Han was gone.

“Ben, I've seen his ghost.” Leia told Ben.

“Me too. But I, uh, I pushed his spirit out of his body. So he wouldn’t have to stay frozen.”

“What? Benjamin Skywalker Organa Solo, what did you do to your father?” Leia insisted.

“We had a different fight, before the fight Chewie saw. The Old Man punched me in the face, and I hit him and long story short, I almost didn’t give him the blast vest. But I knew I had to give the Hutts something.  Then again, it’s not like I wanted him to suffer.  I used the Force to push his spirit out, so when he fell into the freezing chamber, he wouldn’t be trapped. It’s still connected. Once he’s out of hibernation, body and spirit will be reunited. I think. I’m pretty  sure.  I did it to myself, a couple times, when I was in too much pain to take it, and I’m still here.”

Leia interrupted Ben.

“I’m sorry, you did what? Is this something the Sith taught you?”

“No. I figured it out myself. While I was doing my Sith training, which is pretty much torture in solitary confinement. I got hurt pretty bad during training. All of us did. The pain drove some of us mad, and some of us just died. But I figured out how to use the Force to push my spirit out of my body. If the pain was too bad, or if I was too sick? I’d just leave for awhile. You can pretty much go anywhere you want. Me, I used to like to go to forests. Or deserts. I went to Hoth a few times. Quiet places where there were no people. So I did the same thing to the Old Man. Pushed his spirit out of his body. He should be fine. I always am.”

Leia looked at Rey.

There were tears in her eyes, too.

But she quickly got angry when Ben finished explaining himself.

“Anyway,  that chasm the Old Man fell into on Starkiller Base? It was a huge carbonite freezing chamber.  Before I delivered him to Jobi, I checked the slab.  He’s alive. Or he was, then. Right now, he’s hanging on Jobi the Hutt's wall. At Jabba’s old palace on Tattoine. At least he’s been completely safe for the whole war.”

“You ruthless little pirate bastard! What did you owe the Hutts?”

Leia slapped Ben.

Chewie sat down heavily, opposite him.

He muttered something.

“Rathtars? What rathtars? Chewie, you and Han were selling rathtars to the Hutt syndicate? Were you insane?”

“They were my rathtars. It’s your fault, Mom. When you sent Dad to Starkiller Base, he was supposed to be delivering my rathtars to Jobi. The Hutt wanted both of us on his wall after the Old Man didn’t deliver his product. And I couldn't give Jobi the money back, because I already invested it in some product he was selling me that I already had buyers for. That and I owed him for the rathtars. But he made me a real sweetheart deal to get Captain Solo back on the family wall. I really didn’t have a choice.

“You were still in business, Ben? The whole time?”

“Everybody was, Mom. What was I supposed to do, quit? You already gave Dad the boot and what were he and Chewie gonna do? Starve? Were we all supposed to miss the opportunity to get rich off another Galactic War? I gave the Old Man a Captain’s Medal, and he stayed on the Outer Rim. He was safe, we made money. People got to have booze, cigarillos, coffee and rubbers so they could have a little fun during this war, because I brought them in. So don’t say Ben Solo didn’t help the war effort. Everything worked out until you decided my Daddy needed to come and bring me home because I had been a bad boy.”

Leia slapped him, again.

This time, Ben fell off the stool.

“Shit, Mom, quit hitting me! My balance is off, I sprained my ankle.”

Leia forgot about everything else she was going to ask him.

“You’re hurt, Ben?”

“It’s fine. I fixed it, before. When I first put by boot on, last night. It’ll heal. No doctors. Mom. No needles. No bacta tank. I can’t do any of that. If I get sick enough, ever to need needles and medical droids and bacta tanks? They’ll have to keep me unconscious the whole time. You don’t want to know, and telling you about it would break my mind. No. No fucking doctors.”

Ben’s voice raised in pitch and in volume

He looked scared.

He was terrified.

Without thinking, she reached for his hand, and her mind was assaulted by a barrage of terrifying images from his memory.

She could hear his screams.

Ben tried to pull his hand away.

But Leia pulled him into her arms.

“It’s alright, Ben. You’ve carried this pain long enough. I’m your mother. I can bear some of it, for you. Now I understand. I understand.”

Ben hugged his mother back, and started to cry. 

“I’m sorry, Mom. I’m really sorry.” he sobbed.

“You’re still my son, Ben. And I love you. And I’m so glad you finally came home.”

Ben cried for a long time.

***

“Ben, let me see your ankle.” Leia demanded.

Ben stuck his foot out.

“It looks really bad. I can’t stand on it, today.” he admitted.

“It does. If this isn’t set right, Ben, you'll be limping all the time. How about one doctor. An old lady, like me. No droids, no bacta tanks, no needles. No exam room. I’ll bring her here, to Rey's tent. You don’t want to limp for the rest of your life, do you?”

“No. I’ll try.” Ben agreed.

Leia went to get the doctor.

“Fucking ankle! What about the Old Man? I fixed up a place for all of us to lay low, but I can’t go now, Chewie. I can’t walk.”

Chewie told Ben that they needed to make a plan, anyway, and they'd wait to rescue Han until he was healed.

Rey laughed.

“What’s so funny?” Ben asked.

“If Han survived, he'll be so proud of you. You’re a real pirate, Ben. You sold your own father to settle a debt and get a load of swag from the Hutt Syndicate.”

They all laughed at that.

***

The doctor wanted to see Ben, alone.

Chewie knew how afraid he was, and refused to leave him.

The doctor came out, after she was done, to talk to Rey and Leia.

They waited for the doctor.

“Your son is a powerful man. Without the use of the Force. With brute force, he could have crushed me with one hand. He’s almost the size of Chewbacca! A rescue party made the mistakes of approaching him in a way that looked like an attack, and I treated five people for minor injuries they sustained. With no weapons. And he was terrified of me. Terrified.”

The Twi’Lek doctor sighed.

“When they held him captive, Leia, the First Order tortured your son. I don’t…well, the ankle, first. The ankle isn’t broken. It's badly sprained. He tied two sticks to it with a rag, shoved his foot in the boot, laced it up tight and walked on it. I’m not surprised. He’s tough. He had to be. There are scars on his ribs, on both sides, he’s broken every one. And the scar on his collarbone tells me that someone stapled it together. The scars around the stitches are ragged. They held him down, stapled his collarbone together and sewed his muscle and skin shut with no anasthesia. Then they probably let him lie, and after it festered, shut him up in a bacta tank. He’s also broken his elbow. And there’s a scar. It starts on his right hip, crosses over, wraps around his leg, and ends just above his knee. It’s from a torture droid. Your son is a strong man, mentally, that he could survive.”

“What about his ankle, doctor?” Rey asked.

She didn’t want to hear any more of the other things.

“Ben needs to wear a brace for a month, and limit his walking for about two weeks. Keep his foot elevated. Use a crutch or a cane. I told him. He didn’t like it, but I told him listen to me, or limp forever. Does Ben have somewhere to go? Someone to take care of him?”

“He does. And I don’t mind. If he can fly? We can leave, as soon as he gets something to eat.” Rey volunteered.

Ben came out of the tent, hopping on one leg.

“I’m not using that crutch. It’s undignified.”

“Ben, if you were worried about your dignity, you should have conducted your personal business a little more quietly last night. Or come to this camp with pants on.” Leia suggested.

“All that added to my legend. This crutch makes me look weak.”

Rey ran into the tent, rummaging around, and then came out.

“Here, Ben. I found it in a wreck in the woods. I restored it and used it when I twisted my ankle, even though it was too tall for me. The bottom part is real wood. Some kind of dark wood, it’s not painted. That top part is a geode.”

Rey handed Ben the cane.

“This is better. I’m going home, Mom. To the Outer Rim, to Tattoine. I have a place out in the hinterlands to hide. Tell me when it’s safe for me to go back to Anchorhead and be Ben Solo again.”

“Rey, you know Ben Solo makes his home in Anchorhead because he’s a smuggler and a pirate, don’t you?’’

“Honestly, Master Leia? I’ve always had a problem with flyboys. I don’t mind at all.”

“Be careful, Rey. My son, here? He’s a whole bunch of guys. One for every occasion.”

Rey waited for Ben to deny it.

But, he didn’t.

“Add one more, Mom. Ben Skywalker. I am a Skywalker, after all. Ben Skywalker, and his lovely wife. Just two nice kids without a lot of money, trying to get by.”

“Rey Skywalker? Master, Leia, can I can be Rey Skywalker?”

“Yes, Rey. Welcome to the Skywalker-Solo family. I’m very sorry for you.” Leia replied.

She hugged Rey, and then hugged Ben again.

“Don’t make waves, kid. I need to think about what I’m going to do about this Ben Solo and Kylo Ren problem. Do you have anything to prove you killed him?”

“I brought his broken mask and his gloves to Exegol with me. They’re still in that cave. Why do you think I fought so hard?”

“What about his lightsaber?” Leia asked.

“Threw it away. This is Uncle Luke’s. I’m going to make another one. I liked the crossbar, but I’ll make the beam a different color.”

“Good idea. Lay low, and don’t worry about your father. Chewie and I will figure something out.”

***

“Luke, I need you to do me a favor.”

The Jedi Master’s Force ghost sat down beside his sister.

“I don’t think I need the Force to predict what you’re about to say.” he replied.

#reylo #ben solo lives #ben solo #kylo redemption #kylo ren #star wars fanfiction #star wars the rise of skywalker #post tros #rey

[danishprince]

star wars: the rise of skywalker thots; or, The 2010s Really Were The Year Of Learning That Villains Fuck, Huh (spoilers under the cut ofc)

by “villains” i mean palpatine, ofc

rey palpatine. huh. did not call that one. was not surprised at the reveal though.

palpatine fucked!!!! in canon!! WHOM had sex with ian mcdiarmid 

uh. anyway

j.j. abrams, directorially, is almost too reverential. like that worked great for tfa, and then the last jedi was rian johnson simultaneously saying “fuck you” to certain narrative traditions while staying true to the core of others (yes i liked tlj), and this was nostalgic again which felt a bit too heavy-handed after we’d broken from that format.

what was finn going to say to rey? i assumed it was “i love you” or something but that was just (to my knowledge) never addressed again lol

though i could have, like, missed something? 

idk

T H E  F I N A L  O R D E R

are they like GHOST SHIPS or what. where they from

palpatine being magically pseudo-alive felt particularly gimmicky. though i don’t really watch sw for coherent plot devices lol

lol wish we had had some finn character development or backstory or something....dude’s character was not done justice! wtf

liked poe’s backstory bits despite myself, liked his flirtation/past with that random spice dealer even more despite myself, felt very disaster bi, felt authentic 

also uhhh oscar isaac Hot

my inner 11-year-old LOVES seeing a girl have her very own hero’s journey. wish i had seen these as a kiddo if only so i could pretend to be rey while playing with the neighbor kids. it makes me happy that girls have her.

rose tico however got SHAFTED what the FUCK

like yeah i thought the bits with her freeing the animals or whatever in tlj were kinda corny but that’s no excuse for the complete lack of screentime god damn

reylo lol

i........liked the kiss sue me! i have never cared about ship wars (i haven’t genuinely cared about shipping fictional characters since the age of like sixteen), and i certainly never wanted them to be a thing or anything, but in the moment it felt right. chem is tree

my brother was like “why’d kylo randomly die” and my mom was like “because the power of true love” so...guess she ships it lmao

on that note, was sort of bemused at the lack of finn/rey. it wouldn’t have really fit into the film the way it was structured, and i’m glad it wasn’t shoved in randomly, but it’s weird to set up a Token Hetero Couple and just...drop it. esp because to a degree it would have felt more revolutionary than kylo/rey to me. but also i’m not super invested either way

finnpoe woulda been cool but i had 0 expectations

ok Why’d they kill kylo. in terms of redemption, what a cheap shot. i wanted the dude to actually atone goddammit. and i realize that sw is very much a “one good deed cancels out the rest of your Bad Life Actions in terms of karma” type series, but also hhhhhhhhhh come on man i wanted real redemption.

leia bits seemed very clearly edited in to fit her pre-filmed scenes. but what can ya do there really. rip carrie fisher :(

i’m frustrated that the series once again ended up being White Boy Angst Festival especially when tfa was leading away from that. augh.

overall i enjoyed it but only on a shallow blockbuster level. it was fun, i’m not really gonna think about it more than that, i wasn’t really anticipating much so i’m not super disappointed, i’m just. bemused at some of these choices idk

store war

#star wars #the rise of skywalker #personal #my reviews

[kissmemando]

It’s College

Peter Parker x fem!reader

Warnings: none

Summary: y/n is moving into MIT and meets her dorm neighbor Peter

It was move in day at MIT, y/n pushed her cart of things to her dorm with her parents and siblings. She was undoubtedly nervous to finally meet her roomate, Paula from London. They had been emailing and texting over the summer and really clicked. As she approached her dorm room a boy from across the hall had stumbled over and dropped a box of miscellaneous objects. Instinctively, y/n stopped the cart to help the boy. She started to help pick up the dropped objects when something caught her eye.

“I’m more of a Han Solo type of girl, but Luke’s cool too,” y/n said as she handed the boy his things including a small Luke Skywalker figurine made for a keychain. She usually wasn’t this confident, but she felt the need to connect with him.

“Thanks, I’m uh Peter, Peter Parker. Luke isn’t too bad anyway, he’s a Jedi which is pretty sick.” Peter replied shaking her hand.

“It’s nice to meet you Peter, I’m Y/n y/l. I gotta finish moving in but I’ll see you around, I’m just around the hall.” Y/n flashed a smile at him and he did the same causing her to blush a bit. She walked towards her family and began to help them unload her things. It looked like Paula hadn’t arrived yet so y/n got first pick on the beds. She chose the one by the window because it reminded her of home.

“We should go get lunch before we have to take the plane back home.” Y/n’s mom said. They walked out of y/n’s dorm into the hall and y/n took a quick glance at Peter’s dorm hoping to see if she could say bye. It was only about 1 in the afternoon and she was sure she’d see him when everyone at her dorm meet for their group meeting about rules and safety.

“So who was the boy you helped?” Her father asked as they headed back to her dorm building

“Uhhh Im not sure, I just met him, his name is Peter.” She answered swiping her family into the building. It was now about 3:30 and they had a flight at 9 pm but wanted to be there by 5pm because they are parents.

“We are just gonna go to your dorm and grab our things and come right out. Your dad has to give back the rental car and it’s gonna take us about an hour together to the airport.” Y/n’s mom told her so that she is prepared for their separation. Truth was that y/n had hardly been away from home. The longest she’d been away from home without her parents or siblings was probably a week for her engineering camp mentoring program. She was nervous, even though sometimes her family would drive her insane she loved them dearly.

“Yeah mom I know.” She said back her mom as she guided them back her dorm. As she unlocked the door she looked over once again to Peter’s dorm wanting him to come out and chat. She looked to the other side of the room and saw Paula’s things, but no paula.

“Alright y/n, walk us out.” Y/n grabbed her mother’s hand as she said this. It was time for her to grow up. they reached the front exit of the building and y/n hugged her siblings then her dad who told her she was meant to do great things and then her mom hugged her and kissed her on the cheek. Y/n loved her mom but they weren’t super close. She didn’t tell her mom everything they weren’t best friends but it felt like she was losing herself on this woman’s arms.

“Be good, don’t forget to call me, I love you and goodbye” goodbye stung her heart. Y/n didn’t like goodbyes they always felt terrible. Once out of her mom’s arms it felt like a piece of her heart was missing. Her mom was crying making her want to cry but she couldn’t, she didn’t want to.

“Bye I love you guys.” She said as they walked out on the verge of tears, really trying hard not the cry. Behind her, she heard a similar encounter.

“I’ll be fine Aunt May. Don’t cry cause then I’ll cry. Come on May.” She turned around and saw Peter with a softly crying woman on his shoulder. “May you dont live too far I could as come and visit and you can visit me.” Peter walked the woman to the door and they hugged goodbye, y/n stood waving bye to your family as they drove past, she could see the tears in her mom’s eyes.

“Goodbyes are so hard aren’t they.” Peter said as he stood next to her watching May get to her car.

“God, you’re telling me, it’s like torture especially with the people you love most.” He nodded his head in agreement.

“Y/n right,” she nodded her head yes, “you wanna walk back to our dorms together since they are right down the hall from another?”

“Yeah sure” they started to the elevator and got to know one another.

“So where are you from y/n?”

“I’m from y/h, born and raised. You?”

“Queens also born and raised.” Peter said and a proud smile appeared on his face. His hands were placed in the pocket of his blue jeans.

“Nice” the elevator doors opened and the two heard a girl laughing extremely loud from Y/n’s dorm. Y/n’s door was open and the two peered in to see a girl and guy on the ground laughing.

“Emilio? What are you doing in here?” Peter looked at the guy on the ground, who had light brown hair that looked orange in the sun. “Oh uh Emilio’s my roommate” Peter half whispered to y/n. She smelt his cologne off his neck when he spoke to her. It warmed her heart a bit making her forget that her family just left.

“I was just helping Paula with this box,” he pointed to a box on the ground knocked over and it’s contents on the ground. He stood up and helped Paula up as well.

“Well you must be y/n I presume, it’s nice to finally meet you, sorry about the mess.” Paula said and took out her had for to shake it. “ and you are?”

Peter took out his hand “ I’m Peter, Peter Parker, Emilio’s roomate.”

“Well it’s nice to meet you Peter.”

“We better go” emilio said picking up the box and he and Peter left the room.

Later, at the group meeting you and Paula walked in together. She was tall, with mocha skin, and very pretty. She walked briskly to the meeting in the community room. The two were the first there and sat on a sofa that fit about three. Later people started to come in and soon enough Peter and Emilio showed up. Emilio sat in the arm rest of Paula’s side of the couch and Peter sat in a chair next to y/n. When he took his seat he smiled at her.

“Hello Emiliano,” Paula said in her English accent.

The RA began to drone on about rules of the dorms and Peter looked at y/n acting like he was sleeping. She giggled quietly and looked away trying to concentrate on the RA. What she didn’t see was Peter smile to himself. He liked her little giggle it was adorable. Y/n knew Peter Parker was gonna be trouble but she welcomed it.

After the RA, Hadrain, was droning on he told everyone to take the time to get to know those that lived in your building and after you may go to dinner. Instinctively y/n looked over at Peter.

“So Peter, I’m guessing you like Star Wars”

Peter rolled his eyes in a joking manner, “ yeah I guess I’m into it” he said sarcastically.

Y/n smiled at Peter and they two continued to chat, until Paula and Emilio forced them to go to dinner. As they walked Emilio and Paula were ahead arms were linked

“Did something happen that we missed with the two?” Peter ask, brows furrowed.

“ I have no idea but, it’s only the first day maybe this is just how they are, maybe it’s just like friendly.” Y/n said messing with the sleeve of her sweatshirt.

The four had finally made it too the dining hall and finished eating.

“The food really wasn’t all that” y/n said, unimpressed.

“Well it is college cafeteria food.” Peter replied

“But rich people go here.” Peter smiles and nodded his head in agreement

“Alright well I’m right to hit the sack” said Emilio and he got up from the table. Y/n didn’t have much of a chance to look at him before but now she could see more of his features. His brown hair that looked red in the light and she noticed some freckles. His eyes were green and his face was pale but she wasn’t sure if she was white, maybe Hispanic or mixed.

Y/n felt good walking with her little group of friends, because she never thought she’d have any especially at such a competitive school. Once in front of her dorm room Emilio hugged Paula by and simply said bye to y/n. Y/n galanced over to Peter who was on his phone, texting his Aunt May. She figured he wasn’t going to say by and pulled out her keycard.

“Wait, I don’t get a goodbye y/n?” Peter looked up, he sounded half joking and half serious.

Y/n blushed, “well bye mr.parker I’m sure I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Goodbye ms.y/n I hope you sleep well.”

—————————————————————————————————————

Author’s note

Hiii, I’m Indie! I hope you liked my first story I’ll probably be writing a part two soon depending if this is well received or not. Also if you have any suggestions or ideas please HMU! Thanks for reading ❤️

#peter parker #avenger #fanfic #peter parker x y/n #peter parker x reader #spiderman #marvel #tom holland #college!peter parker

[shadowsong26fic]

Coming Attractions!

New month! I’m a couple days late but things have been Busy…

Usual updates behind the cut (along with a Prompt Call because why not!)

So, I didn’t get as much done as I would’ve liked over the past month--mostly because I really ended up in crunch time with my SWBB over the first week or so, and then needed a break, and then work got slammed. (Which I knew was coming, technically, I just didn’t know it was going to be this bad, since it wasn’t last year…)

Anyway. So I didn’t get any origfic done last month, like I hoped I would, or much of anything on Precipice. But I did finish my BB project! I’ll be editing it/etc. over the next few weeks and posting on May the Fourth. Should be fun! (It, uh, still needs a title, but I have like a month to come up with one, lol…)

Other things I hope to get out this month:

Next Precipice chapter at last--I do have it about half-written, I just need to sit down and finish it (and also probably map out a little better what some of the others are going to be up to for the first section of this arc).

(Hopefully two or three chapters over the course of the month, but at the very least this next one.)

(I have been doing some Plotting/planning/etc., but most of that has been related to some things that happen towards the end of this arc, or even later. Like, uh, arc nine or ten.)

(…yeah, uh, occasionally I talk about this fic as if I have Everything Planned Out and while it is true that I’ve done a lot more in the way of outlining/plotting than I usually do, there are still some pretty big gaps. There’s a couple arcs that are like “plot points A, B, C, and F happen here” but I’m less sure of what characters who are not directly involved in said plot points might or might not be up to…which is the situation with Arc Seven at the moment, lol.)

AU outline. Probably the next installment of Ventress, but maybe something New. Or Let’s Go Steal a Crossover.

Get some origfic writing done.

I’m also hoping to get out some other fanfic content of some kind, whether that’s as a bonus fic or additional content for one of my established AUs, as a new project (i.e., our faces like a mirror; which I’ve done teasers/draft bits before but not gotten to a Proper Postable State) or as a standalone piece of some kind, but we’ll see.

…on that note, impromptu/informal prompt call? Anything in particular you’d like to see me write? Request as many things as you want, for any fandom I’ve talked about on this blog or referenced in my index post. I will do my best to fill at least one prompt per person.

…and, since this is really short…here’s a couple teasers for upcoming content! As with all teasers, these are not in final form and are subject to change/editing before they get posted.

Precipice:

“We’re not going to liberate it. We’re going to keep our heads down as much as possible.”

“Right,” she said. “So, we’re Maia and Joren Retak again?”

“Nope,” he said. “Obi-Wan and I set up some new IDs, just for this trip. Ones that, if we get caught, can’t possibly trace back to your mom and Luke.”

Leia nodded. “So, are we meeting a contact there, or something?”

“Not exactly,” he said. “We’re going to land, make our way into the center of the city, and break into the Temple there.”

She blinked. “The Temple? …wait--”

“I have something for you,” he said, opening one of the false panels under his seat and pulling out a little box and passing it over to her.

She opened it, very carefully, clearly trying to demonstrate her self-control and patience even as she was all but vibrating with excitement.

Inside was some metal tubing, a power cell, assorted wires…everything she needed, except for the one key component that was hardest to source, for her to...

She looked up at him. “I’m going to build a lightsaber,” she said.

“Yes,” he said. “And for that, you need a crystal. So we’re going to Jedha.”

our faces like a mirror

“Take me with you?”

I wanted to. Stars above, I needed to. Korkie was my son, he had been from the moment he was born and my sister had placed him in my arms. There were times when he felt like the only good thing in my life, especially as things between Satine and I got more and more tense.

But I couldn’t.

Korkie was only eight, and while he might make a fine warrior someday…

I didn’t bring children to war. I wouldn’t. Not for such a selfish reason, at least.

I shook my head.

“Mom--”

“Where I’m going, ad’ika, is no place for children,” I said.

He was quiet for a moment, then asked, in a very small voice, “Will you be safe?”

“I…” Have I ever been?

But that was not something I could say to my eight-year-old child. He deserved some measure of innocence. I had always believed that.

“I will fight to make myself safe,” I said instead. “To make all of us safe.”

“Where will you go?” he asked. “I can find you, later, when I’m grown—”

I squeezed his hands. “Someday, maybe,” I said. “I don’t know exactly where I’ll be, but…if you think it’s right, you’ll find me.” If that’s what you think is right, let it be a test. If you want to walk my road, ad’ika, you’ll need to prove yourself.

And maybe he would for Satine’s, too. A different kind of fight, a different kind of test.

Jedi of Valdemar:

He turned to see a man leaning in the doorway, wearing worn and weathered Whites, watching him with a closed expression. The stranger was a few years older than Kallus himself, perhaps forty, clean-shaven, with light brown hair, almost blond, just long enough to tie back.

He was also missing his right arm, which had been amputated just above the elbow.

Kallus felt his spine stiffen almost on instinct. Despite Zeb’s assurances, he felt like he’d been caught out of bounds somehow. He steeled himself for trouble, preparing the best way to explain himself without getting his partner or anyone else in trouble, when--

“You know,” the stranger said, pushing himself away from the doorway and padding into the center of the room with easy grace. “In my experience, practice tends to go better if you have someone to bout with. I have some time, if you’re interested.”

He considered him for a moment, more concerned about why he was being extended this offer than anything else.

A lesser operative might have taken in this stranger, his age, his injury, and underestimated him. It was possible that he assumed Kallus would do the same, and planned to put him in his place accordingly.

But Kallus was very, very good at what he did. And he didn’t get the impression that that was the stranger’s goal. To test him, yes, absolutely, but...not for that.

And he did have a point, that Kallus could use someone new to bout with.

He inclined his head. “Sir,” he said--as good as his command of Valdemaran was, he preferred to speak as little as possible, mindful of the attention his accent and occasional pauses to search for the correct word or grammar drew.

The stranger grinned at him, then selected a hand-and-a-half longsword from the weapons rack, settling into a guard stance as if it was the most natural thing in the world. “Then let’s have some fun.”

#shadowsong26fic #shadowsong writes star wars #shadowsong writes crossovers #shadowsong writes original fic #coming attractions #miscellania #feedback greatly appreciated #precipice #valdemar au #our faces like a mirror

[bri206]

Soulmates Part 4

Later that night after the credits were long gone, Oliver looked down to see her glasses askew  and hair in several different places. A soft smile crosses his lips, as he gently reached over to turn off the movie, causing the room to go in darkness.

After getting out from under her, he lifts her up effortlessly and takes her back to the master bedroom. Laying her down on the queen size bed, he goes through their night ritual, scraping her of her slippers, tucking her under the sheets and last but not least, pulling off her glasses and laying them on the nightstand. After shedding everything but his boxers, he joins his wife in her bed. One thing he is happy that hasn’t changed, is the act of falling asleep in her arms.

The next morning, Oliver wakes to an annoying buzzing sound. Opening his eyes, he immediately sees his wife wrapped around him like a spider monkey. For a second he thinks that he just woke from a cruel dream, but then everything halts that chance at hope, when his phone goes off again, Not wanting to disturb Felicity, he slowly reaches for the phone beside her glasses on the nightstand.

“Hello?”

“Ollie? Oh thank god, where have you been, I’ve been calling you for the last 30 minutes.”

The moment her voice hits his ears, Oliver’s eyes go wide.

“Laurel” he whispers.

“Yes, Laurel, who else would it be?”

“No one, ummm, what do you need Laurel?”

“I need to know why you bailed on me last night. Ollie, last night was supposed to be a huge night for us.”

Deciding he didn’t want to have this conversation with his wife literally clinging to him, he slowly untangles her and gets out of the bed and heads to the living room.

“Laurel look, I’m sorry ok, I came down with a… bug.”

“Wait you got sick last night? Was it the shrimp, I knew there was something off about those apps.”

“What? Uh, yeah it was the shrimp.”

“Oh, well do you want me to come over and take care of you?” “NO.” he clears his throat. “I mean no, you don’t need to be around me, and besides I’m pretty sure I’m getting better.”

“Are you sure, because that’s what girlfriends do, take care of their boyfriends.”

Cringing at the title and situation Laurel just explained, Oliver pinches the bridge of his nose.

“I’m sure Laurel.”

At the end of his sentence he hears footsteps behind him. Looking up he sees Felicity wiping sleep out of her eyes and giving him a questioning look. Shaking his head he silently assures her it’s nothing.

“Ok, well then I’ll come and check on you in a little bit.”

“Laurel you really don’t have to do that-”

“I’ll see you in an hour, I love you.”

“Laurel-”

‘Click’

“Laurel?”

Taking the phone away from his ear, he sees the call has ended.

Sighing, he closes his eyes.

“Girlfriend problems? Or is it ex-girlfriend problems, because…”

He gives her an adorable  look that says ‘please stop’

“Did I wake you?”

Walking in between his legs, she says “Only when I got cold and realized my space heater was no longer there.”

“Is that all I am to you? A source of heat?” “And very attractive sight for my eyes.”

Leaning down, she kisses him.

“Good morning.”

“Morning” he says in his husky voice.

Leaning back up and heading to the kitchen for coffee, she asks, “So what did Laurel want?”

“Oh you know an explanation on why I left her early last night.”

“And let me guess, the excuse was … you live in a bad neighborhood so you had to get home early?”

“You’re never going to let me live that down are you?”

“Never” she whispers.

“ I do hope you didn’t tell her that the real reason you left her was to see the woman that has your heart and watch Return of the Jedi?”

“No, I thought it’d be best if I told her that I got food poisoning.” He says wrapping his arms around her.

“The crab cakes?”

“Shrimp.”

Before he can kiss her again, his phone goes off again.

“Argh, I’m sorry.”

“It’s ok , you should probably go anyway, people are going to be wondering where the prince of Starling is, if he doesn’t show up soon. And judging by how you conversation ended, I’m going to say that Ollie has some issues to work out.

“Let me at least make you breakfast first.”

“As much as I would love that, I can’t, I’m already running late.”

“Then I’ll make you toast.” “You are one determined man Oliver Queen.”

As he starts to prepare the toast, she goes back to her room to get dressed.

After about five minutes of content silence, Oliver remembers something.

“So, I never asked, did you come up with a plan yesterday?”

Walking into the room in a black pencil skirt and red top, she sighs while putting her hair in its signature ponytail.

“No, I mean I really came up blank yesterday, but in my defense I was doing double time. You?”

“I got nothin.”

“Well we better come up with something, and soon, because if we’re still here in two weeks our situation is going to become even more difficult.”

“The Gambit.”

“Yeah. As much as I don’t want you to endure that again, you’re gonna have to get on that boat if the time comes.”

“I know” looking down at their intertwined hands, he meets her eyes again. “I know.”

“Hey, but that is worse case scenario, I promise. Right now we just need to find a way to get in contact with Sara, which will be my mission for the day.”

Going off for the third time in ten minutes, Oliver is very tempted to shatter his phone against the wall.

Looking down at the flashing screen that says 10 missed calls, 20 missed messages, & 5 voice mails. Felicity takes a deep breath and simply lays a loving kiss on his cheek.

“Lock up on the way out will you?” she says as she grabs the toast and coffee Oliver prepared for her, and heads for the door.

“Yeah. Felicity.”

“Yeah?”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

And with one final step out the door, Oliver is left alone with his thoughts, and they weren’t good.

When he opens the door to the mansion, the first person he runs into is one of the last people he wants to speak to, his mother.

“Oliver, where have you been? You left so abruptly last night, I got worried.”

“Yeah, sorry, Laurel had a headache.”

“Oh, did you stay with her last night?” “Um, no.”

“No?”

“I stayed with… Tommy. Laurel had a really bad headache and I didn’t want to disturb her so I dropped her off and headed to Tommy’s.”

“Oh”

“Yeah, so umm I’m just gonna go lay down.”

“Ok” she simply says as she watches him go up the stairs and disappear behind the wall.

Walking into his room, he immediately closes the door and sighs. Everything was not going well, and he knew if they stayed here any longer it would be inevitable for things to change, and he couldn’t let things change because no matter how much he hated those 5 years, he wouldn’t give them up if that meant he got to have Felicity and William.

‘William’ how easy would it be to just write a letter to his son and save so many years of pain and questions for him. But he couldn’t because there could be so many consequences if he did. But even that thought didn’t stop him from gazing at his desk, or slowly walking over to it and sitting down. But before he could grab the pen, there was a knock at the door, and someone entering.

Thinking that it was Laurel, his shoulders immediately went tense and his senses on alert.

“Hey man”

At the sound of a deep familiar voice, Oliver’s demeanor went slack. Turning around, his eyes went soft.

“Tommy”

“Uhh it’s the one and only, no need to get all nostalgic or anything.”

“Sorry, umm, it’s been a morning.”

“Yeah your telling me, have you seen the headlines?” “What headlines?”

“The one where Oliver Queen goes to an unknown Thai place near the glades in full out suit and tie.”

Standing up, he immediately takes the phone out of Tommy’s hand.

“Oh no” he whispers.

“Man, I swear you could sweat a bead and people would go crazy” Tommy says flopping on the bed. “People will do about just anything to make a buck and get your attention.”

Noticing that Oliver isn’t paying attention, Tommy waves his hand.

“Yoohoo, Earth to Oliver. Dude that is literally the least you need to worry about, I mean who cares, you were getting Thai. Although that is a bit odd, since when do you like Thai?”

Finally looking up from the article, he processes everything his friend just said.

“Look it’s a big deal because, I may have lied to Laurel on where I was last night.”

Knowing that his comment is risky considering the fact that he knows Tommy is in love with Laurel, has him being hesitant. But then he remembers that past him didn’t know that so he tries to put it off like he doesn’t care. For a second he swears that he sees a hint of hurt in his friend’s eyes, but just like that it was gone.

“So where does she think you were last night?”

“Here, sick. But my mom thinks that I was with you.”

“Oh Ollie, always the one stuck in a web of lies. Your lucky I like you, and I guess I can lie for you, as long as you tell me where you really were last night.”

Oliver knows that his friend was not in the dark when it came to his indiscretions, in fact sometimes he encouraged it, which made this a little bit easier for him, no matter how much he hated this part of his life.

“I was with a girl last night.”

“Are you just gonna keep me hangin on this, I mean I could just simply accidently let it slip that you never made it back to my place last night. Unless you gave me deats. Was she hot? A good lay?”

“OK, yes she was hot and really good in bed.”

Those weren’t lies and he doesn't feel bad for bragging about his wife, in fact that’s what a husbands supposed to do right?

“And for the record, you wouldn’t have outed me.”

“You my friend are right, gotta keep that promise we made back in second grade.”

Before he can respond, there is another knock at the door. Laurel carefully walks in.

“Hey Ollie, I brought you some chicken noodle soup.”

She stops when she sees Tommy.

“Laurel look I appreciate it but I really am ok, like I said I was.”

“Yeah it’s a miracle, he can walk again.”

“Shut up Merlyn”

“Ok Lance, just trying to help.” Turning her attention back to Oliver, she asks, “So now that you’re feeling better maybe we can go get some breakfast or something.”

“I-”

Before he can say anything, his phone goes off. Pulling it out of his pocket, he sees it’s an unknown number.

‘SOS’

His alerts immediately go into overdrive, but then go down slightly when the next message goes through.

‘It’s Felicity by the way’

“I have to go.”

“But Ollie, what about breakfast?”

“I’m sorry Laurel, my dad needs me right now, but I’ll call you later” he says leaving the room.

When he gets to QC, he practically runs to her office, looking for the threat. When he arrives, he immediately sees her standing in front of something and thinking really hard. When she sees him creeping in, she gives off a little huff.

“Relax Oliver, I’m not in danger.”

At those words, he slightly relaxes.

“You sent an SOS, what am I supposed to think?”

“Oh yeah, that, it wasn’t because I was in danger, It’s because of this.” She says pointing at a board she created with sticky notes.

“What is this?”

“This is my plan to get back home.”

“That tone doesn’t sound promising.”

“That would be because we can’t do everything else unless I get a computer. And before you say I can buy one for you, A- I can’t wait & B- None of them are what I need. Which leads me back to square one.”

“Which is what exactly?

“Me here talking to you. Oliver, I’m running out of ideas, and we need to get out of here before things change.”

“It might be a little late for that.”

Turning around abruptly to meet his eyes that are currently looking down at her desk. “What do you mean to late? What did you do?”

“Nothing… Ok it was something, but it shouldn’t be that big of a deal.”

“What did you do?”

“Well apparently there’s a photo and article floating around about me buying our Thai food last night.”

“Ok. What were you supposed to be doing?”

“I was supposed to go back with Laurel last night.”

“And there’s more. Why was last night so significant?”

“I remembered this morning that, she was going to tell me that she was thinking about going to law school, but she didn’t know if it was a good idea because she wanted to wait for me, and I was supposed to tell her to go for it, but…”

“Are you telling me that because you did not have that conversation last night, Laurel Lance may never become a lawyer, meaning that she won’t be able to get us out of our situations. Oh god Oliver, this is not good. In fact this is really bad.”

“I know. I know.”

“And there’s also the fact that if she sees this article, she’ll know I was lying,  which-”

“I got it” she says putting her hands up to stop him. Taking a deep breath, Felicity starts to process. “Ok I will deal with the article, and you need to figure out how to have that conversation.”

He nods his head.

“And Oliver, don’t touch anything. I mean it.”

“I won’t, I promise.”

As he is about to leave a thought occurs to him.

“Hey you said that no one has the technology that you need right?”

“Uh yeah.”

“Well you’re wrong, because we do know someone that has advanced tech that could get a signal through.”

“And who would that be…. No, No absolutely not.”

“Felicity think about it ARGUS is our only bet.”

“Yeah but you’re forgetting something, we don’t have friends in the inside, meaning we can’t just waltz in and take anything we want.”

“No but have you forgotten who I am?”

“Don’t you mean who you will be?”

“Felicity, while I may not have powers like Barry or Kara, I do have my brain and my skills. That is my superpower. So what makes this any different than a recon mission in our own time?” “Well, we kind of don’t have the equipment. And we can’t forget that Amanda Waller is in charge.”

“Look I will deal with everything and I will pick you up after work.”

He turns to leave.

“Whoa, wait what? After work, we can’t just leave.”

“Felicity we don’t have a choice and the sooner you get the equipment you need, the sooner we can get back to William.”

At his name everything goes away, and she knows for a fact that he’s right.

“Ok. I’ll be ready.”

Nodding his head, he simply says “Good” and walks out to clean up his mess. 

@candykizzes24 @wherethereissmoak @ao3feed-oliverfelicity @almondblossomme @dreamalongwithamy @smkkbert @miriam1779  @jcc04220 @emisfritish @smoakqueenalways @leuska

#Olicity #oliver queen/ felicity smoak #A03 #a03 fic #soulmates #arrow #oliver queen #Felicity Smoak #oliver & felicity

[swfanficbyjz]

SW Rey Theory - Legacy of Light - Chapter 26

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(10 and 11 years after Return of the Jedi)

           Ashla stared numbly out the transparisteel glass of the Millennium Falcon as Nyx jumped the ship into hyperspace. It was strange to be back on this ship, but it felt good to be somewhere familiar again. She knew better than to be worried about her mom now, but she was tired of feeling guilty that her mom had to save her sorry butt. As if Ahsoka didn’t have enough to worry about, now she was causing her more trouble. One of these days she was going to get her killed, and that scared her. She bit her lip and glanced over at her uncle that she hadn’t seen for fifteen years. She’d been so lost in thought, she didn’t realize he was studying her. “What?”

​            “Nothing…” he looked away, brushing his long dark hair out of his eyes. He looked thinner than she remembered, and paler. Was he still drinking so much?

​            “Thank you for picking me up,” she said nervously, expecting him to be angry that he’d had to get involved with her again. She had no idea how her mom had found him and gotten here so fast, but she was grateful. “I don’t mean to cause you trouble.” He sighed and leaned his head back against the chair.

​            “You aren’t trouble, Ashla,” he murmured, closing his eyes. She wanted to ask him why that wasn’t what it felt like sometimes, but maybe it was better to let it go. She couldn’t remember the last time he was this quiet and not upset about something. She wondered what had changed since the last time she’d seen him. They’d kept in touch over the years, but not a lot was said about where they were or what they were doing. So the conversations were brief and sporadic. She’d missed him, despite knowing that he’d probably been happy to be rid of her after dropping her off at the enclave. “I’m sorry,” he said after awhile. “I should have taken better care of you.”

​            “Uncle Nyx…” tears welled up in her eyes and she hopped up to hug him. “You did take good care of me. I didn’t understand it before, but I do now. You were scared, and after what I’ve seen, I understand why.”

​            “But it was my job as your guardian to protect you and I didn’t,” he patted her awkwardly on the arm and she let go. She’d forgotten he wasn’t as openly affectionate as Rex had been. 

​            “You can’t blame yourself.”

​            “But I do.” He stared at his feet. “When your mother showed up on my doorstep, I liked her right away. She gave me a hard time, pressuring me into letting her stay while I got beat up by thugs looking for some money I owed them. I don’t remember what all happened, but when I came to, they were gone and Ahsoka was standing over me offering to help me up. I never did figure out how she got rid of them, since there weren’t any cops nearby, but I was too grateful to care. After seeing the way she fought that guy back there, well… I guess I finally have an answer. Now I feel pretty foolish for all my rants to her about how much I hated Jedi. Without her help, I think my business would have tanked. She pulled me out of a bad place, kept debt collectors off my back and helped out around the shop. I was nervous about the future when she told me she was pregnant, I had no idea what to expect. Dealing with kids was not my forte. She was so patient with me, she let me help take care of you even though I wasn’t your father and I guess I fell in love with you a bit quicker than I wanted to admit to anyone.” He fell silent for awhile. She kept hoping he’d continue, but he didn’t.

​            “My mom said that even though leaving me behind was the hardest choice she ever had to make, she trusted you,” she smiled reassuringly at him. 

​            “I don’t know why. I badmouthed her old life, I badmouthed your father, I even badmouthed her…” 

          She reached out and squeezed his hand. “Jedi can sense things. She knew that in your heart you were a good person and that you’d take care of me as if I were your own, and you did.” She tried to sit back down but felt something inside her and she almost missed the seat. “Whoa.”

          “Are you alright?” he asked as she hunched back against the seat.

          “Yeah, I'm just tired." She stared straight ahead wondering if it meant what she thought it did. She shook it off, she'd been through a lot today and frankly, she didn't trust her senses right now. She hoped she’d be able to trust them again after what happened with Starkiller. "Nyx?”

          “Hmm?”

          “What changed? Why are you suddenly so… uh… nice?” She blushed realizing that probably wasn’t how she should have asked him what was going through his mind.

          “I guess I’m turning into an old softie,” he smirked at her and looked away.

          “Seriously, what gives? You’re acting weird.” She rolled her eyes.

          “Something your mother said before she jumped out…” she held her breath wondering if he’d actually tell her what that was.

          “Well? What?” she begged him to continue.

          “All these years I’ve stupidly believed that I’d gotten stuck raising you when that wasn’t at all what I thought I wanted to do. I resented her for the trouble it caused me. Meanwhile, she’d been wishing it was her that had you. That she’d gotten to be the one there and not me. The ironic part, I suppose… was that if your mother had been interested in being with me, I would have helped raise you anyways.” He looked up at her and she watched him curiously. “I don’t think she ever wanted me like that, mind you, but I kept hoping maybe she would if she saw what I did for you. Then seeing her again, wowee… it took my breath away.” His eyes widened, and he looked at her. “Don’t tell her I said that. I shouldn’t have said that.” He leapt to his feet and left the cockpit mumbling to himself and she stared after him confused. 

          She shook her head, smiling. So that was the main reason he’d put up with her for so long? He was still madly in love with her mother. It didn’t really surprise her to learn that. Everyone she’d ever talked to that had known her mother was enamored by her. And why shouldn’t they be? She was amazing! She was powerful, strong, soft, kind, brilliant... Ezra had admired her. Rex respected her and would do anything for her. Chewbacca had cared for her. Her father, who’d married a queen, had fallen in love with her. Ahsoka was just that type of person; you couldn’t help but love her. 

          She glanced down at her belly. She wasn't sure how she felt about sensing she could be pregnant. She thought she'd loved Galen. They'd definitely had chemistry, but after finding out who he really was... the idea that she was carrying his child made her nervous. She wanted to be a mother, at least she'd known for sure she did after making that deal with her own mom years ago. This was not how she’d imagined it, but maybe now that her mom was back from wherever she'd gone for so long, maybe they could finally be together. Maybe her mom would help her raise it. Although she hoped Ahsoka wouldn't be disappointed to find out Starkiller was the father. 

          Thinking about her mom reminded her that she’d just left her to fend for herself with dozens of crazy acolytes closing in around her and Starkiller intent on killing her. She tipped her head back, reaching into the force. “Mom? Are you still there?”

          “Of course, I am, love.” Ashla smiled the moment her mom’s voice came through. “It takes more than a raging maniac to bring me down. You should know that by now.”

          “I do, I do,” she laughed. Her mom sounded lighter, but still so serious. Like she knew something Ashla didn't. She didn’t know enough to understand the whole weight of what Starkiller had been trying to do to her, but the way her mom had reacted when she’d said they had dad’s helmet… Her mom had reacted in fear. It had crashed through her so strongly it had startled her. She’d never felt her mother afraid before. If she had been, she’d hid it well. Her mom had always known what to do, what to say. She seemed so sure of herself all the time, and Ashla wanted nothing more than to live up to that; to become that confident.

          So if her mother was afraid of this, she was too. This was bigger than she thought. She stared out the transparisteel glass and tried to relax, but a deep sense of foreboding settled inside her. They’d dismantled the Empire before, they could face this threat too, right?

 ---

          "I need to, uh, meditate," Luke looked away nervously after Leia went to check on her son. Ahsoka watched him tiredly for a moment but didn't move. Seeing him in person after so long was strange. He was almost a spitting image of Anakin, but she could see Padmé’s softness in him. Life and responsibility had been thrust at him with such force it was amazing he was standing so strongly in the light. This was the child that had tipped the balance in his father and brought him back to her. If only he knew how much that meant to her. Maybe someday she would tell him. Or maybe not. Well Padmé, your children turned out just fine. I think you’d be proud. I just wish after what we’ve all been through, that things were getting better not worse. I promise I’ll try to help them as best I can.

          "Master Yoda. Master Kenobi. Anakin… If you're there, we need a word," she said aloud, crossing her arms in front of her.

          "Oh right... I forgot you… wait..." Luke didn't get to finish his thought as the three force ghosts appeared in the room.

          "It's good to see you again, Ahsoka."

          "I wish it was under better circumstances," she brushed off Obi wan's words, not in the mood for false pleasantries. She paced back and forth as she recited everything she possibly could about what she'd learned on Taris, without of course, mentioning that Ashla was her daughter. She tried to ignore the way Anakin watched her carefully. The others were distracted by the words she'd said, but he’d always been in tune with more than that. He knew something else troubled her and she wasn't ready to say what.

          Once they were deep in conversation about the information she'd delivered, she slipped out and made her way to her daughter's room. She sat down on the bed and dropped her face in her hands, sighing deeply. It wasn't long before she felt Anakin join her. She should have known he'd follow her here. Didn’t he have bigger things to worry about? This was about his family after all.

          "I sense there's something else that's bothering you about this." He sat next to her on the bed.

          "That's because there is," she sighed again. She was too tired to cry now, she just felt numb. Why couldn't the dark side stop needing to rule the galaxy for five minutes?

          "Talk to me, Snips." He reached for her hand and she let him take it. At least the flicker of electricity she felt gave her hope she wasn't too far gone.

          "Starkiller said that they were trying to resurrect Darth Vader. I don't know if that's possible, but I have a feeling that if they manage it, you're not going to come back to life as this. You'll be something twisted and dark; and possibly worse than before. I can't lose you again, Anakin. My heart can't take it. I'm getting too old for this." She wished she could lean her head down on his shoulder or fold herself in his arms, but even though he sometimes felt solid, she knew she'd only go right through him. Which would be considerably less satisfying. She was capable of curling up in a ball all by herself, doing it with him there would only exaggerate the pain.

          "You won't lose me, Ahsoka."

          "You don't know that.” She threw her other hand up in frustration. “I'm tired of fighting. It's all I've ever done. Every time I think I could lay down my lightsabers and walk away, something else happens."

          "You don't have to get involved in it. This isn’t your fight. You've warned Leia, you've warned Luke. Let them worry about it now. You've done more than anyone can ask of you," he smiled reassuringly at her, but he didn't understand. He didn't know the whole truth. It wasn't that simple. Their fight was her fight, because she had a daughter that also belonged to him. They might not be her blood, but they were still her family in a way.

          "I can't stop, Anakin. I have too much to fight for."

          "This is about more than losing me, isn't it?" He tipped her chin back.

          "Yes."

          "Tell me."

          "I can't, Anakin. Someday I will, I promise, but I'm not ready yet." Her eyes burned with the millions of tears she'd already shed over this. Why couldn't she just tell him about their daughter? Why did she hold it back now? She had nothing to lose... and yet, it felt like she had everything to lose...

          "Ahsoka..." he was interrupted by Luke's call from the hallway.

          "Dad?"

          "Go, your son needs you," she breathed, gesturing to the door.

          "What about you?" he looked back at her sadly.

          "I'll be okay." At least she hoped she would be. He hesitated a moment longer and then left her sitting there alone. Ashla was safe; she was with Nyx. She was out of Starkiller's grasp. She'd be okay now. But she'd just found out her daughter was pregnant, and it felt like history was repeating itself. Only this time around, it was far worse than before, and somehow the stakes felt so much higher.

          She scoured the room for any of Ashla's belongings she'd left behind, put them in her bag and left Devoran behind her. It was time to confer with Morai and learn everything she possibly could about these acolytes. Morai had told her something very disturbing on Taris; she wasn't the only one that had escaped Mortis in a new form. Her brother; the Son... Ren… was still alive, and he might be the one behind all this. Which meant, this wasn't just a small-time cult with delusions of grandeur. It was a far bigger threat than any of them were ready to face. He'd had far too many years to build it before being discovered. Why hadn’t she connected the dots before?

 ---

             “What’s the matter?” Ashla studied the faraway look her uncle got as he held her newborn child. The fallen walker they’d made home in the middle of the desert on Jakku was… well it would do for now. It was private. It was far from everything, and after the Empire’s horrible defeat here, it was the last place anybody would think to look for them. Hopefully…

           “Nothing. I was just remembering what it was like to hold you for the first time. I delivered you too, you know. It’s come full circle I guess,” he smiled at her and brushed his jet-black hair back out of his eyes.

           “You delivered me?” she laughed, sitting up on the bed. She wished her mom was here right now, but as usual Ahsoka had far more pressing matters to attend to. She wondered how Luke was doing. If they’d been able to help Ben. Her mom had told her not to worry about it, but she did. For the second time she’d been taken away from her brother; her family. Just when she’d thought things were finally looking up. She’d locked away her mother’s lightsabers and sworn that she wasn’t going to do anything that could draw attention to them here. But if this child ended up being a force user, she wanted it to learn too. She’d have to worry about that when it got older.

           “Well obviously I didn’t do the work, but I caught you when you came out. Don’t sound so surprised!” Nyx had chosen to stay with her for awhile after they’d found this place. She was grateful to not be alone. He’d changed a lot in fifteen years. He didn’t drink anymore, but he still liked to gamble too much. She got the impression that he was trying to make it up to her mother for all the years he’d resented her. She didn’t care why he stayed, she was just glad he did. He came around and handed the little girl to her. “So, what are you going to name it?”

           She was instantly in love with the infant in her arms. She thought about what her mom had said about how she got her own name. Then she remembered what Ezra had said to her; about how she lit up the room like her mother, and for the first time, she fully understood how something so amazing and good could be born of darkness; as though the sun had finally peeked out from behind the clouds. She smiled, unable to hold in the joy she felt. “Rey. Her name is Rey.”

Epilogue - >

#star wars #Star Wars Fic #anakin skywalker #ahsoka tano #anakin #ahsoka #ashla okami #ashla #starkiller #galen marek #galen snoke #snoke #rey theory #legacy of light #rey #nyx okami #nyx #luke skywalker #leia organa #ben solo #master yoda #obi wan kenobi #obi wan #force ghosts #devoran #taris #the knights of ren #ren #morai #mortis gods

[gurguliare]

things I thought sucked in the Last Jedi:

Hux slapping Finn LOL !

...

Anyway uhhhh

wish Luke had been in that movie. Don’t really see how a character gets from like. “in a moment of madness, for just a second, I activated my lightsaber IN SELF-DEFENSE AGAINST A MASS MURDERER” to “in a moment of madness I almost killed a teenager.” Whatever your enjoyment level of Snappy One-Liner Grandpa in this film, I think any solution to a mystery (how did Kylo Ren turn?) which then introduces a new and much vaster characterization mystery...... is a bad solve. Sorry. It sucked. It was awful. “Oh, Luke was so exhausted by the cleanup efforts after the collapse of the Empire that his whole worldview shifted 90 degrees to the left” sure if you had another three films to do this in I guess. Not to mention that everything leading up to the temple debacle is left unimaginably vague: it adds The Barest Nothing to our understanding of Kylo from the first movie, and it gives no interesting insight onto his resolve at the end---so the unwriting of Luke’s character doesn’t even pay dividends in some kind of functional, minimalist, plot-sculpting way

...............

Hey, hate to say it, but that was philosophically incoherent! I miss when “The Dark Side” and allegiance thereto was defined by evil actions, such as murder, rather than “a sexy indefinable presence full of mirrors!” Sensing good in Vader meant sensing literal reservations and self-doubt; sensing darkness in Ben meant ....... uh ... smelling puberty? Smelling brainwashing? Smelling the future? COOL I saw someone speculate (with Scant Grounds To Be Honest) that Ben had already planned on destroying the temple and recruiting some students, and that plan was what Luke picked out of his mind: why on earth would your response to that be to execute the teenager preemptively

Finn dragged on meaningless lengthy B-quest. to no purpose other than quite incidentally knocking Phasma off a tall thing? The surviving touchstones of his characterization seemed to be “cares about Rey” “comic relief” and, to offset, “hypereffective and knowledgeable in First Order-related areas,” which I would appreciate more were it paired with literally any interest or concern for his relationship to his own past, lmaoooooooooooooo. @crocordile has a better post about this here. His crunchy “banter” with Phasma! Oh man!

Rey had no arc or development so that’s cool. It’s very funny to me that people have been blasting/lauding this one for being less OT-derivative when Rey’s stuff is like... yoked to Luke’s ESB/ROTJ plot in a way that makes it impossible for the movie to make any meaningful comments about her. At least “A New Hope” was legitimately generic! In this case, because they were so proud of their Twist at the end, even the c/p’d “[x] had good in him all along?!?!?!?” (which made no sense as executed) was revealed to be as utterly fanciful and childish as it sounded, stripped of context and endlessly reproduced---which, like, okay? That means what for Rey, exactly? ESB was about Luke discovering a path all his own, unlike anything demanded of him by others; TLJ is about Rey wandering around a bit on one of the two ways signposted for her, before being informed that no, the second way was inappropriate to the circumstances, it’s time to go back to the first now. Okay. Cool. She can relax.

The mutiny was unbelievably contrived and seemed to consist largely of annoying parables strung together with twine. It required above-romcom-levels of snap assumptions and information withheld; additionally I fucking hate being expected to be grateful for the revelation that more than one older female authority figure can be competent at a time. Holy shit. Hey, was there some reason Holdo waited until five transports were left before ramming the First Order ship? JW

Speaking of which, hahahaha it’s really funny how they turn Leia into a gruff smiling mannequin in this movie in a way that would only be remotely excusable if they were setting up for IX/the climax of the trilogy to be all Leia-Kylo shadow war except then Fisher died. not that the climax of the trilogy was ever going to be Kylo vs Leia. Oh haha Kylo couldn’t bring himself to kill his mom despite all his boring grandstanding, his mom is definitely ready to kill him, that could go somewhere---AHAHAHAHAHA RIGHT WHAT AM I SAYING

Oh Leia is strong in the Force thanks good reminder. Imagine being an air molecule intimately caressed and reeled in by General Princess Leia’s psychic corpse

“my son is truly dead”

Oh I... I have more complaints but I think I’m actually running out of steam now. Sorry. I should have stopped before.

The “what is the Force” montage was really embarrassing

Hux got dialogue argh

The one consistent throughline in this movie was that all actions and ideas entertained were pointless or misguided; the protagonists were lucky, however, in that authorial fiat canceled out their ‘choices’

Force-sensitive newsie children? Why

things I thought were good in the Last Jedi:

there was a man sitting in the row in front of us with his upturned popcorn bucket over his head

#tlj spoilers #star wars spoilers #sorry this is a scramble but

[chasholidays]

Snowed in bellarke!

Clarke knows are worse ways to spend Christmas Eve than trapped in a shopping mall with her ex. She could be in a hospital, for example, working like she did last year, or, even worse, there for an actual emergency with herself or a loved one. She could be starving, or homeless, or in some actually bad situation. Hell, she could be stuck here with Finn or Lexa, which would be a thousand times worse than being with Bellamy.

Because, honestly, the worst part of being with Bellamy is that their breakup hasn’t entirely scabbed over, and every time she looks at him, it chips away at her stubborn belief that she’s fine, that she doesn’t regret it.

Maybe Finn or Lexa would be better after all. They would have had an uncomfortable greeting, a quick chat, and then she would have come up with an excuse to go somewhere else. The mall isn’t so large she couldn’t have avoided them, and they probably would have let her.

With Bellamy, she’s already trying to come up with a list of questions to prolong the conversation.

He’s the one who approached her, coming up while she was browsing books, hesitant like he wasn’t sure he’d be welcome. It’s the first time she’s seen him since they broke up almost exactly a year ago, and the sight of him was a shock, but with greetings and the weather sure is frightful pleasantries out of the way, she’s already getting used to it.

She still keeps stealing glances at him, but that’s a different issue.

“You’re not going out to see Octavia this year?” she asks, as they leave the bookstore. It feels like thin ice, skating close to the dangerous waters of their breakup.

“No.” He sighs. “She’s in Norway now, actually.”

“Norway?”

“Apparently she was right about her online marketability. I didn’t think she could actually make a living running around the world posting hiking pictures on Instagram, but she marketed herself, got sponsors–” He shrugs. “I’m not ready for the social media age.”

“I could have told you that,” she teases without thinking, and to her relief, he smiles.

“You did tell me that.”

“I tried, anyway. Still, I’m sorry,” she adds. “It must be tough, having her so far away.”

“It’s got its ups and downs. I don’t know. I think someday we’re going to find a happy medium between how much I need to know how she’s doing and how independent she needs to be, but right now, we’re still working on it.”

“If it helps, that sounded really mature and emotionally healthy.”

He snorts. “Thanks. I’ve been practicing in front of the mirror.” He looks at her hard, considering, and when he asks, “So, who’s the last-minute shopping for?” she thinks it probably wasn’t really what he wanted to say.

But it’s not hard to figure out what that would have been. Not with their history.

“My mom. I was putting it off because I never know what to get her, and she never knows what day it is anyway. I’ll send this late and she won’t even realize I missed Christmas.“

“The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree,” he says, deliberate.

“I knew it was Christmas Eve.”

“And did you actually know you were putting off shopping this long?”

He’s trying to make it teasing, but the tone doesn’t entirely land. It’s getting too close to old wounds.

Clarke considers her and Bellamy’s breakup a perfect storm of shittiness. She’d been working herself to death at the hospital, convinced that was the only way to become the success she thought she should be, while Bellamy was dealing with his sister drifting further and further away. Their frustrations hadn’t really been with each other, but she couldn’t be the partner he needed, and he couldn’t be the one she needed either.

After years of flirting, it turned out they’d ended up finally getting together at the worst possible time, and Clarke’s regretted how their short disaster of a relationship went ever since, without having a very good idea of how to fix it. Everything Bellamy had said about her priorities had been true, and even if her life has changed since then, she’s never known how to fix it. The problem certainly wasn’t just that she worked too much; he fucked up too. At this point, she’s half-convinced that they just weren’t meant to be romantically involved. That they had some sort of fundamental incompatibility.

But maybe they could be friends again. Maybe that would be enough.

“I knew, yeah. I kept hoping I was going to find something online so I wouldn’t have to go to the post office.”

He smiles. “Yeah, that’s the real pain. But no luck?”

“I’m not good at online shopping. I need to see my options.”

“But still nothing?”

“Still nothing.”

“So, where are you going next?”

“Best Buy.” She frowns. “What were you here for? You’re always on top of Christmas shopping.”

“One of my coworkers found out I didn’t have Christmas Eve plans, so she invited me to a party. Which is now canceled because of weather, so I’m just stuck out here instead.”

“Sorry.”

“I don’t care that much. I wasn’t really excited about going out.”

“You, not excited about a social event?” she teases, and he laughs.

“I know, it’s shocking. Best Buy?”

The relief that he’s coming with her is so profound it’s almost staggering; she tries not to smile too widely.

“Best Buy.”

*

She buys her mother a FitBit, because it seems like her mother’s kind of thing, and Bellamy stuffs his hands in his pockets, waiting awkwardly for her to be done. Every time he has a chance to leave and doesn’t, her heart soars, and she has to remind herself that they were always friends. Getting along was never their problem.

“You think the food court is open?” she asks.

“Probably. Everyone’s stuck here past closing time, the stores are probably thrilled.” He makes a face. “Sucks for the employees.”

The mall was supposed to close at five, but the storm came in suddenly around four-fifteen, roads became impassable out of nowhere, and now they’re stuck here until the plows can clear the parking lot.

“We can put a twenty in the tip jar,” she offers, and he smiles.

“Can’t hurt. What were you thinking?”

They talk options on the way to the food court, end up at the Chinese place because Bellamy’s craving egg rolls. There are a decent number of people milling around–at least she wasn’t the only one caught off guard by the storm–but they don’t have any trouble finding a table with relative privacy.

It doesn’t exactly feel like a date, but it’s nice.

“Is this going to be a problem with work?” he asks, once they’ve started eating. “When’s your next shift?”

“Tuesday,” she says, and waits for his surprise.

It doesn’t take long. “You actually got Christmas off?”

“No, we’re closed on Christmas.” She smiles a little. “I switched jobs.”

A clump of rice drops from his chopsticks. “Switched jobs?”

“Yeah, I’m working at a clinic now. Fewer hours, less overtime–it’s not perfect, but the work/life balance is a lot better.”

“What does your mom have to say about that?”

She shrugs one shoulder. “She thinks it was bad for my overall career. There are fewer opportunities for job advancement, and the pay is worse. But it’s my life, not hers.”

“And you’re happy?”

“Yeah. It’s so much better.” She worries her lip, trying to calculate the correct ratio of apology to gratitude to regret. “I shouldn’t have snapped at you. When you told me I wasn’t happy–you were right, and I shouldn’t have lashed out.”

His mouth tugs up. “I shouldn’t have brought it up in the middle of a meltdown. We were both having a shitty time and decided to make it worse for each other. We both fucked up. But we’re both doing better now, right?” he adds, and there’s a hopeful lilt to his tone.

She thinks there is, anyway.

“I am, yeah.”

“Good. I’d, uh–I’d been wanting to call you. I hated that we just totally lost touch.”

“Yeah, me too. Is it weird that I felt like I had to get my life right first? Either I had to be happy with the job I was in or get a new one.”

“No, I get that.” He taps his chopsticks on the styrofoam container with his food in it. “Maybe we’re just supposed to be–friends when things are going well.”

The hitch in his voice at the word friends is either awesome or heartbreaking, and the fact that he could still break her heart is definitely just scary. Not surprising, really, but scary all the same. It’s probably the biggest reason she never got in touch again, the nagging fear that he wouldn’t want anything to do with her.

“Or maybe we just need to get better at dealing with crises,” she offers.

His whole face relaxes with his smile. “Maybe, yeah.”

The silence that follows isn’t exactly awkward, but Clarke doesn’t know how to fill it. She wants to tell him that she misses him, that she regrets losing him, but it feels like a lot to confess in a mall food court.

The PA crackles into life, postponing the issue. “Attention shoppers. We are still working to clear the road and parking lot. The theater will be opening for special showings of Star Wars: The Last Jedi for any patrons who would like to purchase tickets. We apologize for this inconvenience.”

Bellamy catches her eye. “How many times have you seen that?”

“Just once.”

“Wow, you’re behind. Did you not like it?”

“It’s only been a week, shut up.”

He grins. “So, you want to check it out?”

“If we can’t leave anyway.” She frowns. “You still don’t have a car, right?”

“No, I took the bus. I’ll probably get a Lyft home once we’re cleared out.”

“You don’t have to, I can give you a ride.”

He starts a response and then stops it, frowning. “If it’s not too late, sure. That would be nice.”

“You were going to tell me I didn’t have to, weren’t you.”

“And I know you know that, so–yeah, a ride would be great. I’ll pay for your movie ticket, so we’re even.”

“For the negligible cost of gas, sure. I’ll get candy.”

It’s an easy pattern to fall back into, movies with Bellamy. She remembers what snacks he likes, he knows where she likes to sit. They’ve done this dozens of times, throughout their friendship and relationship, and it feels like getting back into the right groove.

She leaves her hand on the arm rest between them, too, like she used to, and after a minute, Bellamy reaches over and takes it.

After the movie, he lets go, and she’s the one to reclaim his hand, lacing their fingers together as they leave. It can’t possibly be this easy, but she thinks there are worse messages to send than that she wants it to be.

“The parking lot has been cleared, and you’re free to leave,” an exhausted-looking cinema employee tells them, as they leave the theater. “Happy holidays.”

“Happy holidays,” she echoes.

They’re quiet as they make their way out to the parking lot, and once they’re outside, it’s even quieter, the whole world white and soft with snowfall.

“So, uh, I was thinking,” says Bellamy, not whispering, but low, trying not to break the spell of the night.

“What?”

“It seems like neither of us has plans for Christmas Eve. So if you wanted to–” He lets out a quiet laugh, squeezes her fingers. “I miss you so fucking much, Clarke.”

“I miss you too. All the time.”

“Good,” he says, and tugs her in by their linked hands, ducking his head to kiss her, soft and careful, perfect.

Somehow, against all odds, it’s actually an amazing Christmas Eve. And Christmas is shaping up to be even better.

#londonrainings

[unplacedpodcast]

Chapter Two: Forgotten (Script)

Chapter Two script behind the cut - same notes as episode one notes (in that this is probably not Proper Script Formatting). Spoilers ahead! Chapter three will be posted soon. 

(ding of audio recording starting)

Is this thing on?

(Narrator makes rimshot noise (badumtish))

But seriously, folks...

Uh, moving on from bad jokes about bad jokes. They're kind of a nervous coping mechanism of mine. At any rate, here I am with my update on the Twilight Zone episode that is my life now, after…what seems like forever but has actually only been a few days.  

Things are going...okay, I guess. The good news is, when nobody can see you, you don't have to worry about paying for groceries. I can walk into a store, *any* store, get what I want, and walk out. No muss, no fuss.

Not that I'm indiscriminately stealing or anything. I'm not a thief. I will admit, I definitely went into the Neiman Marcus and wandered around looking at expensive handbags for fun. That was the first time I've been in a department store without being conspicuously followed or pestered in five years or more.

But yeah, not paying for groceries is nice. On the other hand, rent was due two days ago and I have no idea how that situation is going to play out. I'm not making money any more, since I appear to not exist as a human being or even a general concept at this point, and incorporeal beings definitely don't get paid for not existing at jobs they don't have.

I've tried calling my friends and family, and it just goes into the ether. I get the same message every time - the calm robot lady saying my message can't be delivered. Text messages get no replies. Neither do emails. And the last time I tried to log in to Facebook, it told me that the user didn't exist.

If I can get past the fact that it's happening to me, it's actually really interesting. It's not just invisibility, it's like I don't exist - or maybe never existed? It's like a Jedi mind trick, or some kind of distortion field around me specifically. Like, okay, let’s do an example. I'm going to take you to the coffee shop down the block so you can hear for yourself.

(Muffled noises of the phone being moved, door shutting and opening, silence for a second, then background noise of a coffeeshop)

I'm standing in the middle of this coffeeshop, right? There's at least thirty people in here, in between the baristas, the people in line, and the people chilling out drinking their half-caf no-foam soy lattes. Now, observe.

(Muffled noise of a mug being moved around on a table, then the sound of a coffee mug shattering loudly - the coffee shop background noise doesn't let up at all)

In case you couldn't decipher those noises, I just dropped a coffee mug on the floor and nobody noticed. Everyone just went about their day. Now - okay, now, a few seconds later, someone saw the broken pieces all over the floor and called an employee. But they didn't hear or see it actually break, they just noticed a few minutes later that there's a mess to clean up, and then they had somebody else deal with it.

(Narrator pauses for a moment, makes a "hm" sound)

There's probably some kind of metaphor about human interaction there.

It's like this with everything. Whether I move it or straight-up throw it at the wall, angry poltergeist style, it doesn’t make a difference. I haven't tried hurting people, because you know, I'm not a jerk, but as far as grabbing an arm or a shoulder, or poking somebody in the side, they don't notice at all.

And...that's about what I've been able to discover so far. I can wander around shops without being bothered, break things and make other people clean them up, and poke people with total impunity.

(dryly) I'm basically a supervillain in the making, is what I'm saying. I just need to start mapping out places to heist, or creating my freeze ray, or whatever.

(sigh) At any rate, as far as I know, nobody has filed a missing persons report, either. I've been checking the listings online, waiting for my name to show up, but it hasn't yet. I don't know if that means my friends and family think I'm somewhere else, or if there's some other explanation.

If I can make a silly confession, because it feels better to say it out loud…I haven't tried to reach out to any of them in person. I really don’t think it would do any good, so I've been putting it off. I’ve avoided even trying because I just...don't want to deal with that. I don't know if I can deal with that. I might as well today, since I'm already out, and I've already got you here with me. I'll head to my mom’s, I guess, and...let you know when I'm there.

(sounds of the phone being fumbled and set down, with the coffeeshop noise still going on in the background; a second or two later, the recording noise dings again)

Okay. Here we are. I'm standing at the front door, ringing the doorbell.

(sound of the doorbell ringing)

Which is probably futile. Old habits die hard.

(doorbell rings again, a one to two second pause, then the sound of a doorknob being tried and curtains/things rustling)

(muttering to herself) At least she locked it this time. But she probably hasn't moved the...nope, spare key is still here.

(sound of a doorknob clicking and the door opening)

Okay, I'm in. It doesn't look like she's home...I'll look around anyways.

(sound of steps)

I don't know what I was expecting - maybe a huge post-it that said "find out where my daughter is" - but it's not here. There's...no notes on the fridge...everything is normal. No sign she's been panicking.

(voice becomes a bit strained) And...this is weird...all the photos with me in them are...gone. They’re not on the walls, not on the coffee table, or the fridge. There's photos of mom, and old ones with her and dad, from before he got sick, and pictures with my sister in them...but none of the three of us, or me and mom, or me and dad, just - (voice cracks) - they're gone. There's no trace of me in this house.

(sound of door opening in background)

Oh. She's home. Mom?! Mom!

(sound of someone walking by, humming to themselves)

MOM. Mom. I'm right here. Please, please, come on, I'm your daughter - you have to - mom... (voice cracks, starts to cry) You have to see me! You have to be able to - I'm right here - COME ON.

(sound of something shattering)

I know you can see that! (a few sobs and some sniffling)

I…yeah. She can't see me or hear me or anything. She can see her stupid porcelain cow - she collects them - she loves those...I broke it. And she seems more upset about that than about the fact that her daughter has disappeared. Whatever. I can’t.

(sounds of muffled sobbing/sniffling, then the phone clicks off suddenly; a few seconds later, it clicks back on - there's the narrator's voice, still sounding grim but much calmer, and sounds of traffic in the background)

That went about as well as can be expected. Sorry for kind of losing my shit there. I doubt you'd do any better. I doubt most people would do any better. Honestly, I’m surprised I’m not worse off - it’s just…this is all so surreal. I wonder when it’ll start feeling real.

Anyways, I’m back by my apartment, I think I'm just gonna...turn in.

(sound of automatic door opening and closing, a few seconds later an elevator dings, then dings again)

And here we are, home sweet - what the fuck?

(running footsteps)

I swear to...my front door is open. My...some of my stuff is gone. Not all of it, but the couch, the coffee table...they're gone. There's...

(sound of paper ripping)

I just cannot with this day. There's a note on my front door that basically says they're going to come in and remove everything over the next two days. Something about squatters? I don't...Jesus what a shitty day. Wait!

(sound of movement, things rustling, then a sigh of relief)

At least I still have my computer. You can take my…well, my entire existence, apparently, but you'll pry YouTube from my cold dead hands. Also, I kind of need to upload this. Well, dear listeners, whether or not you even exist, I guess this is where I leave you, as I try to figure out how much of my shit I can carry around with me and figure out where the hell I'll be sleeping from here on out. Stay tuned for the process of listening to me figure out how I can hold on to whatever tiny pieces of my life I'm still allowed to have.