#dorian jokes

[ghostampede]

i will never in good faith call 1998 knives “Nai” only because it is so much funnier for

everyone to be shocked the kid named Millions Knives turned out to be evil

the guy named Knives only ever using a gun in the show

knives to literally be born Knives and talk such big game before being defeated in 30 seconds and then carried into the sunset like a sack of potatoes by his goofy twin brother

like they just wouldn’t be nearly as funny if it was a nickname y’know

#trigun #trigun 1998 #knives #millions knives #knives trigun #dorian jokes #aahhahahahahahahahahaha #funny #knives is so stupid in 1998 what a silly guy #i want to toss him around like a potato sack as well ngl #tristamp nai is genuinely such a cool villain #but bro was such a fucked up reddit user esc little nerdy dickwad in 1998 #it was great i love both #also yes ik its a tristamp exclusive thing that he’s nai #but ive seen people call trigun 1998 Nai too #same for trimax #so here’s my take #evil transgender win

[highqueenofashandstars]

For anyone who argues that Chaol is not the most relatable character, during the entire duration of Tower of Dawn, I, too, wondered what Dorian was up to.

#chaol westfall #dorian x chaol #dorian havilliard #throne of glass #all jokes aside I think TOD was a great book and we love to see the character growth #but also chaol is a great character simply because he is only human and with all of his faults that all he gets to rely on #his own strength and that’s it #and his now very hot wife #we love yrene #the assassins blade #crown of midnight #heir of fire #queen of shadows #empire of storms #tower of dawn #kingdom of ash #sjm books #sjmaas #sjm #it’s possible I heard this somewhere but I literally can’t remember where so if there is an OG poster out there please feel free to let me #know so I can give credit where credit is due #i sleep deprived posted many things tonight I can’t remember

[dragonmadness]

Bells Hells As Reductress Titles

#critical role #critical role meme #bells hells #laudna #imogen temult #ashton greymoore #fresh cut grass #fearne calloway #chetney pock o'pea #orym of the air ashari #dorian storm #this is why i returned to this website i guess #happy new year we're entertaining our silly little jokes in 2023 #cr #mine

[sammypog]

men in gothic literature are the ultimate master yappers

#‘i am by birth a genevese ​and my family is one of the most distinguished of that republic🤓☝️’ ok victor let’s get to your pain and sufferin #also the like 20 pages where dorian gray just describes a bunch of random gemstones (???) #like yes thank you for this really useful and relevant information that is definitely a necessary plot point #(guys this is a joke i honestly find these kind of tangents in books charming) #frankenstein #the picture of dorian gray #gothic literature

[lethalhoopla]

imagine you're getting a rare research-and-liquor-based sleepover with your bestie after you've had to split ways across the continent to further bear the responsibility of entire nations/peoples when your other best friend and the love of his life/literal Champion of a city-state bust in and inform you that yet another Big Bad is in fact Bad At Staying Fucking Dead

or, I finally came up with an excuse to riff on this post:

#dragon age #dragon age absolution #dragon age absolution spoilers #dai #dorian pavus #varric tethras #hawke #inquisitor lavellan #they/them lavellan #they/them hawke #tevrael lavellan #rowan hawke #pls full screen i took too much time for a goddamn joke XD #lethalhoopla art #do heart symbols even exist in thedas??? fucking sure why not #dorian and lavellan just wanted to get drunk research weird old magic for leads and talk shit for a night or two #can't thedas stop falling apart for FIVE MINUTES #i like to think that hawke is quickly brought into the fold post inquisition lmao #they're gonna need a lot more booze tonight #i'm so concerned about varric and everyone in kirkwall omfg lmao GODSPEED BABES HANG IN THERE WE'LL BE THERE SOON

[alltears]

dragon age twitter au? dragon age twitter au. SOLAS-BASHING EDITION

#dragon age #meme #twitter #au #dai #inquisition #solas #solas bashing #just jokes though #vivienne de fer #sera #inquisitor #dorian pavus #cassandra pentaghast #dragon age twt

[ksanya]

It's so funny to me that THE bard of the Crown Keepers has the lowest charisma stat number in the group (together with THE MONK). My boy! What happened???

#Where is your rizz Dorian??? #critical role #cr spoilers #critical role spoilers #ksanya's tiny stuff #Low self-esteem is not a joke kids

[misqnon]

do you think sanji ever had to lipsync for his life . do you think the songs got stuck in his head

#anywy the new dorian electra album is really good #coukdnt get this very stupid joke out of my head LMFAO #one piece #comic #sanji #my art #u need to understand like 3 different layers for this to be funny NAKBSJANS

[bogunicorn]

i'm bored so it's time to throw rocks*, here are the types of reality tv/game shows i think the inquisition companions would watch

cassandra would watch one of those romance ones, like too hot to handle or love is blind, and get really, really invested. she's active on the reddits for her favorite shows. all of the cheesy, painfully heterosexual-but-strangely-sanitized reality TV horniness works well on her, she's the intended audience 100%. she's genuinely sad about it when couples break up after the show ends.

varric likes interpersonal dramas and gossip and backstabbing, he watches the vh1 dating shows. he knows most of it is fake, but that's what he likes about it, and he appreciates the classics. anything with "of love" in it, he loves it, he's there. he thinks newer shows work too hard to convince people they're actually real because he thinks embracing the fakeness makes it more fun.

solas has been watching reality tv since the OG: survivor. he's seen every season. he has very strong opinions about play strategies and a personal ranking of the best players of all time just ready to go if you just ask. he's convinced he would win if he was on it, but deep deep down he knows he would never get the votes to win at the end because he'd be seen as a villain and won't apply.

vivienne thinks she's above this kind of garbage tv, but she actually really likes the masked singer. she's pretty good at guessing the celebrities, but she doesn't put much effort into guessing after a point. she's in it entirely to relax and quietly fantasize about being on it herself, because so much of her life is about playing games of intrigue and survival and perception. she records the episodes and skips most of the judging because she doesn't think the judges are funny and gets annoyed when they make stupid guesses.

sera likes the obstacle course-type shows like wipeout and the floor is lava. anything where people have to come up with creative solutions and also might get hit with a giant thing made of foam and get smacked around like a rag doll. sera has been trying to convince people to team up with her and apply for this type of show for ages and it never works out. she also likes the really weird off-brand ones that only ever get one season, like who wants to be a superhero or opposite worlds.

blackwall likes the circle. he always quietly roots for the catfish. no reason.

iron bull is a drag race superfan. come on, one of them had to be. he's been watching since the season 1 vaseline filter days. he approaches each new season with the masculine seriousness of a suburban dad planning a fantasy sports lineup and correctly predicts every winner three episodes in. he would absolutely volunteer for a makeover episode if he could. his favorite queens are usually the pageant queens; he likes the sparkly ones, and the pageant queens always end up covered in rhinestones.

dorian loves innovation and being judgy, so he loves shark tank and anything similar. he enjoys episodes with absolutely terrible inventions just as much as the good ones, and is the kind of viewer who actually will go ahead and buy something he saw on the show -- including the really stupid ones, because he gives them to his friends as joke gifts.

cole watches those shows that are equal parts talent competition and sappy backstories, like american idol, x-factor, the voice, stuff like that. he always cries a little when someone does a ballad. he never votes because he can never decide who deserves to win the most, and he doesn't watch the results shows because they make him too sad.

cullen watches HGTV and gets belligerent if you point out that house hunters is fake. unclear if that's because he thinks you're being a wet blanket or because it was news to him and he doesn't want to admit it.

josephine likes strategy and competition, but the grime, physical danger, and "eat this gross thing" challenges of survivor aren't fun to her. instead, she's really into big brother. josephine is convinced that she would win big brother if she was ever on it, and she's correct, but she can't take the time off work.

leliana is an OG ANTM fan. she'll dabble in other shows that center on makeup and fashion, but she always ends up going back to the classics and the older seasons, as she feels like the current era of ANTM is too gimmicky and self-aware. the human rights violations are allowed if they make good TV.

*this is for fun don't actually throw things at me please

**also if you like this and think "i'm gonna give this fine person a follow because they're so funny about dragon age", i made a new DA sideblog at @skyholdstarbucks where i'd post anything similar to this in the future

#bog post #dragon age #dai #disclaimer that this is jokes it's jokes it's not serious #i love all my children equally #cole #solas #dorian pavus #cassandra pentaghast #blackwall #leliana #josephine montilyet #cullen rutherford #the iron bull #sera #varric tethras #blackwall's is shortest because it's funny not because i dislike him #i like him so much i gave him the best joke #don't @ me #da headcanons

[thegreatmelion]

#cr spoilers #cr3e40 #dorym #ashrym #this is a joke #ashton greymoore #dorian storm #orym of the air ashari #also ignore how janky this looks

[kazz-brekker]

okay so we have the corinthian from the sandman and dorian gray from the picture of dorian gray, how long until sometime completes the trilogy of fictional murderous queer men named after types of greek columns and creates one called ionic?

#i studied greek art history in 3 separate classes and it all led to making this joke actually #pie says stuff #the sandman #the corinthian #the picture of dorian gray #dorian gray #neil gaiman #oscar wilde

[ghostampede]

you say the word “Baseball” and three people look over to you by instinct. one is thinking of the game Butterfly Soup. one is thinking of the Batter from the game OFF. one is thinking of the song “I Don’t Dance” from High School Musical 2. All three of them are Gay as Fuck.

#new tag just dropped #dorian jokes #ha ha #i am comedy #off game #the batter off #the batter #i don’t dance #butterfly soup #all three of them are me

[yes-these-obsessions-are-healthy]

If we put Astarion, Dorian, and Zevran in the same room together, the world would implode in a black hole of ‘Horny to hide my emotional scars’. Just word-fucking each other in an orgy of repressed trauma.

#joke post #astarion #dorian #zevran

[milquetoad]

can someone check on taliesin jaffe please. this is two campaigns now that he’s built a pc specifically designed to seduce liam o’brien and both times he’s gotten cucked by a cool-toned trust fund baby that wasn’t even in the main party

#molly got iced before he could get caleb’s clothes off and essek got his manicured claws in before kingsley had a chance #now orym is sending where u at? texts to dorian while ashton is just sitting there. tragic #critical role #bells hells #ashrym #dorym #widomauk #thIS IS A JOKE POST BTW. i mean i believe it but it’s a JOKE

[cringefaecompilation]

ashton said he really liked apples and dariax's ass has been compared to an apple so if you think about it's it's undeniable proof that the crownkeepers are return- [I AM FORCIBLY REMOVED FROM THE FUNCTION]

#🍃 #critical role #critrole #dariax zaveon #ashton greymoore #also without any jokes can we talk about dariax/ashton parallels #dariax just getting used to people wanting him gone or leaving #not really believing that anybody could like him and then dorian came back #and the first thing he did was kiss him!!!

[rufousnmacska]

Obligatory 🤡 post after an SJM interview

#manorian #manon blackbeak #dorian havilliard #throne of glass #sarah j maas #I won’t give up 🗑️ #this is a dumb joke! #I know other sjm fans feel our pain #Ruhnlidia will be the death of me 🥲😭