#foreign and special to me. fucking crazy that all i needed to do was plot and establish subplots. i feel like i found a skeleton key to

[gentlethorns]

eeeeee excited to write after work even though i'm exhausted bc my period is coming and i'm flaring up AND i had to be on the truck unload today so my body hurts SO bad. i got some good scenes coming up bc this story is reaching terminal velocity!!!! struggling not to rush to the end and let the story organically run its course through me but it's so hard lol. i want to have it done by the end of next week so i'll have something to celebrate by the weekend

#she bork #novel 2024 #the story is pretty bare bones rn like i can feel that it's thin . .. and yet it's STILL shaping up to be like 80k words. insane insane #insane. it doesn't even feel like that much lol like writing this has been SO painless and natural it baffles me!!!!!!!!!!! #idk man to think i might have a full true novel by the end of the year . .. something to pitch and sell and show to the wide world . .. i am #so so so excited!!!!!!!!!! and so so grateful for the way the words have just slipped out of me painlessly. some days have been harder than #others (like i feel like today is gonna be kind of hard bc i'm hitting like the last lull before the big bang of the penultimate plot event #and also bc i am very tired and in pain) but ultimately i have experienced no real road blocks or obstacles in the story itself which is so #foreign and special to me. fucking crazy that all i needed to do was plot and establish subplots. i feel like i found a skeleton key to #every door on the planet

[random-mha-thoughts]

Opposites Attract (Shinsou x Reader)

Pairing: Shinsou x fem!reader

Anon requested:  "Shinsou with the daughter of Present Mic as his S/O, like you wouldn't see it at first but when you pay attention, it's practically obvious that they're daughter and father"

Genre: Fluff/crack (just wholesome pwp fun honestly)

Word count: 1,101

Tags:  @yuki-osaki​ @liviitehe​ @iamsoftsodonttoucheume-blog​ @bunnythepipsqueak​

a/n: Do I never learn?  I wrote this sitting in a classroom before my class starts.  It’s like I want people to judge me honestly.

This won’t be very long, just a cute little crackity fic with little plot to get my writing gears greased.  But it was fun to write!  I based the reader’s character off of a friend I met at college because he has a real radio host personality like I envision Present Mic’s personality to be.

Shinsou can't believe he hadn't realized it sooner.  She's practically the opposite of him: an open book that anyone willing can read, an uncanny ability to get anyone to open up or smile at her jokes, a real MC personality.  Even their color schemes were opposite to each other, her honey blonde hair the opposite of his dark purple locks.  All the things that made him fall for her were right in front of him.

He chokes to himself.  Could he have fallen for one of his teachers in another lifetime?  He pushes the thought away before he goes spiraling down that rabbit hole.

"Y-Your dad is...Present Mic sensei?" Shinsou breathes out, probably about to faint.

His girlfriend smiles brightly.  "Yup!"  She laughs at how pale his face turns at her confirmation.  "Hitoshi, you're losing color in your face, babe, you need to breathe."

Shinsou takes a few deep breaths to steady himself, mentally slapping himself for not being very perceptive.  They've been dating for a few months, and have been friends since he was still in the general studies class.  "I just...never connected the dots," he mutters.  "But your last names are completely different?"

She simply shrugs.  "My mom absolutely couldn't stand him when she was pregnant with me.  You know how women with all those baby hormones are, even the smell of him was annoying to her.  She preferred her last name anyway, and Dad agreed because he's a loving little pushover."  She takes a bite of her food.  "Besides, my name sounds so much nicer with her last name than his.  (Y/n) Yamada?"  The name rolls off her tongue and she grimaces like it's a foreign species.  "Yeah, I'll stick with my current name, thank you very much."

Shinsou chuckles at her antics.  He won't lie, he was originally put off by her nearly over-the-top affability.  The first time he heard her in the hallway, he was lured in by her unique style of storytelling.  Then, after the Sports Festival, she decided to stick herself next to him at lunch one random day and ask a whole list of questions about his quirk.  Being in the Hero class, he naturally held some animosity towards her, but he warmed up to her natural charm and unique speech.  Her personality was magnetic.  She's easily one of those people who can make even a mundane narrative of walking down the street interesting.

Her speaking habits are especially endearing.  Some of his favorite catchphrases of her's were, "By a round of applause, have you ever...?", "Today's mood is...and here's why," and the ever endearing "You're doing great, sweetie" either as encouragement or teasing his mistakes.  And his favorite curse she has every uttered is, "For fuck's sake."  The first time she ever said, "Fuck me sideways" Shinsou almost choked.

At one point, he stopped to think about her.  What exactly is it that makes her such a magnetic person?  Something about her always giddy intonation always makes her stories more entertaining to listen to, like a podcast streaming just for him in his ear.  He's come to love the glimmer in her eyes when she tells stories, the animated gestures, and the crazy facial expressions. Every quirky thing about her is special to him and warms him from the inside.  Her diction and articulation sound like she's reading from a novel.

And the best part is he doesn't have to say anything, the energizer bunny that she is keeps going without stopping until she's finished.  In a way, they're a good match: she talks and he loves listening and admiring her.

"Now that you mention it, you two really are practically the same," Shinsou admits.  He's still dazed about the whole ordeal, his head not quite wrapping around it that well.

"Congratulations, you've now unlocked one of my biggest secrets!" she beams before chuckling, "I mean, if you can call that a secret.  Seriously, babe, you're with Aizawa sensei every day of the week, and by extension, you've seen my dad about half that time.  How did you not see that sooner?"

The boy rubs the back of his neck.  "Guess I should have.  In all fairness though, you're more toned down from your dad.  He's just loud while you have that hint of sarcastic, self-deprecating humor."

"Fair point."

From the other side of the room, a noise calls their attention.  Denki had slammed face-first into one of the pillars in the room because he wasn't watching where he was going and ends up flat on his back.  She points at him.  "It me, especially after training yesterday.  It was rough.  But let me tell you how badly that guy did..."

And just like that she's off, completely disregarding her lunch and pivoting her body towards him.  Shinsou eases into his position, casually eating the rest of his lunch and watching his girlfriend animate herself.

In the middle of her story she stops and realizes Shinsou is staring at her blankly as he usually does, and it's a rare moment when she breaks character.  She gives him a sad smile and quirks an eyebrow, "Hey, do you ever think I talk too much?  I never really let you say anything."

"Hm?" Shinsou's confused for a moment, then he shakes his head.  "No, I actually think it's pretty great.  I'm not the kind of guy who has a lot to say, and I really listening to you."  He lays his hand on her head.  "It's cute, how you have so much to say and you're so excited by it."

His girlfriend digests his compliment and smiles gratefully.  "You usually say I have a way with words, but you know what to say to me too.  I think we just work well together like that.  You know, I'm the one who talks nonstop and you're content with listening.  You're just like Aizawa sensei in that way too.

It's not the first time Shinsou has heard that comparison, with the clear lack of sleep and dark circles around both of their eyes.

And then he thinks to himself.  Wait.  If she's like Present Mic...and I'm like Aizawa sensei... Does that mean...?

His head turns towards the two teachers eating lunch together in the back of the room.  Present Mic is talking his mentor's ear off about nothing of particular interest, and the tired teacher simply ignores him as if it's a completely routine occurrence.  It reminds him of how him and his girlfriend were when they first became friends.

Shinsou 's heart secretly rejoices as if he's figured out some kind of major secret.

#Shinsou x reader #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #shinsou hitoshi #shinsou fluff #crack #shinsou imagine #shinsou scenario #female reader #bnha x reader #mha x reader #bnha fanfiction #mha fanfiction

[orangenfrottee]

Hey ho there, feel free to ignore this and I hope I'm not bugging you as I awkwardly slide in here, but I must ask: if you had full creative control of the show, how would you run season 5? You can pick and choose whatever leaks you want to include.

Ah!!! Thank you for your ask <3 I might have spent a couple nights typing out my answer, but in short: I'd cherry pick old story arcs, bring back everyone I like and who doesn't run when they hear Riverdale's calling.

I'd definitely get some decent writers (I'm partial to Jane Espenson, but no idea if she'd be a good fit) and definitely some diversity. I might accidentally fire all men and then play up all their shitty recurring themes for fun as a weird inside joke between me and the show.

I think if they ever gave me creative control of the show it would swerf hard to the crazy and not leave that lane because honestly, i think that's what Riverdale does best.

So, where would I start...

Instead of giving season four a decent ending, I would start with an extra long pilot with the title 'previously on' where the best and most important bits of the teens' school lives is shown with a heavy focus on Jason and the Farm. Parallely, we get to see the lovestory of Chic and Charles. The episode ends with a few very short scenes of the prom where everyone's happy and pretty.

Then we'd start on the real season five. It's been seven years and our characters are older and more grown up.

The show would at first only present the present lifesbof our characters and the barest bones structure to keep as much a little mysterious as possible (but here I tell you what happened during timeskip, too).

Archie is often considered the main character, so let's start with him:

Archie went to the Army after school (though he didn't actually pass his exams and thus didn't graduate, Mr Honey was quite amused). On his most recent tour he met someone special: Eric, his new friend.

Archie was wounded in battle with a... giant mutated elephant with sharp teeth and hallucinogenic venom. Or something. He isn't really sure what happened, but he's got a huge new scar all over his torso. The abs stayed in tact, but oh his pride. During recovery he met new wheelchair user (and on occasion crutches) Eric who has trouble walking since his legs are misshapen/he only has one. Archie thinks Eric got maimed by the same elephant he was, but thinks it rude to ask.

For Eric I'm picturing Sabrina's Ambrose.

With his hurt pride, Archie can't stay with the military and decides to go back to Riverdale.

Eric doesn't have a place to go, so Archie invites him along.

They need a job and since Eric has a calendar full of sexy half naked firefighters AND since they both have abs, Archie decides that type of uniform is the perfect fit for them and trades his newly renovated and well running boxing gym against the old fire station Penelope Blossom owns. (Literally, they even meet at Pop's to exchange keys and sign papers Penelope brought that Archie doesn't even skim.)

The fire station is quite out of everything, but it has a huge pool Eric likes to swim in and a fire truck. To make ends meet Archie sells his sperm to the Greendale sperm bank.

Archie is of course in love with Eric but unfamiliar with the concept of bisexuality and struggles to identify his attraction for what it is. Eric is a foreigner to Riverdale (or is he?) and unfamiliar with the town's culture and quirks. Still, something going on in Sweetwater River seems to be related to him.

Archie and Eric share the Andrews' House - and in the house next door... live Gladys Jones and Polly Cooper!

After Jughead and Betty left for College Alice' horrid mom impulses settled on Jellybean who didn't stand back, grind her teeth and took it but instead broke Alice' teeth. Her and FP were not amused (though FP was also angry at Alice for being too strict). Alice moves out but stays as a journalist in town.

FP gets in trouble for being a brutal gang leader without a gang beating up criminals behind the boxing gym on tape. Not wanting to go to an illegal fighting club prison, he hides with Canadian Serpents behind the border. (Joaquin's identical twin brother and Ricky live there, too. They're happy there.)

Maybe he'd call once or twice with misleading wrong snake facts that have nothing to do with the current mystery of the episode but fit into perfectly by chance.

Jellybean was invited along, but she chose to stay because she thinks Riverdale is rad and the old Cooper House is luxurious as hell. Also, her mom came back to become the new Sheriff!

Nearly seven years in, Gladys still holds the position because no one legally qualified wants it and she manages to keep gang violence at an all time low for Riverdale. Plus, she and Mary Andrews are not exactly friends but able to work well together. When there's another serial killer running wild in town she has no problem with having another girlfriend of Mary who happens to be a skilled professional in the most relevant field take over for a bit. If needed, the Riverdale gangs are usually willing to add muscle to good causes, too.

Jellybean has left Riverdale for university and will only be present for holidays and breaks. She'd still be played by Trinity because I love her and honestly, real nineteen year olds look like fourteen year olds everywhere in the world. Also this gives the viewers 'Archie vision': he will always see his best friend's toddling baby sister in the young woman which makes her the only undatable (legal) female on this planet for him.

While attending Riverdale High she lead the Andrews Boxing Gym and made it the most successful gym in the area. It won't be a plot point in the show (apart from her being angry at Archie for just trading it against trash) but there will be framed newspaper articlesband the like in Gladys' house.

Around the time everyone graduated, Polly was released from Shady Grooves and is back to her old smart self - and really missing her babies! As Choni leave for whatever private college Blossom women have always gone to, Polly takes them and goes home - just to learn on the porch that not only did her mother sell her childhood home more than a year ago without anyone ever telling her, the college fund she never had gotten legal access to and planned to use for the twins is gone too and her sister left town without saying goodbye.

Gladys has always taken care of all the stray kids she found no matter how tight the budget was and now there's this young desolate mother with twin toddlers in front of her posh murder house she'd gotten for cheap and she has this new gig as sheriff. Of course, she takes them in.

They stay in Betty's old room at first, but they soon get to remodel the attic to give Polly her own room. At present, Dagwood has Polly/Chic/JB's old room and Juniper the one facing Archie's. (When Archie sees her in the room, he actually has a flashback once to when he and Betty used to be so young, but then Juniper turns her gead, stares at him really creepily and smiles weirdly. Archie will be somewhat scared from then onwards and be reminded of when everyone thought Polly might gave killed Jason. Juniper would murder.)

At first, Polly's a full time, stay at home mom, but once the kids are older, she starts working part-time: for Gladys.

It turns out they work amazing together. Gladys tends to jump to convenient conclusions and threatens violence way to freely. Also, she is intimidating as fuck.

Polly is everything she isn't: level headed (to a point, in comparison at least), brilliant at combining clues and steering people (remember how she infiltrated Thornhill and made Cheryl unknowingly assist in her snooping plans?). On top of that, she has these stepford smiles and all the ways to appear unthreatening drillend into her head. Honestly, she and Betty are quite alike. While Betty has the lockpicking skills and knows her way around cars, Polly used to be really into fashion (or something) and, with all her experiences at the Sisters, the Farm and Shady Groves, Polly knows psychology.

She started solving some of Gladys' cases at the breakfast table, but now she's officially a deputy or an advisor or something. They're essentially like FP and Jughead, just that Polly is an adult (and that she wouldn't be in a gang beating suspects up regularly).

(These characters would all be mostly in the background though.)

Veronica finally gained perspective on her relationship to her father and grew up. Hiram's cut out of her life for good. They won't ever interact. (In fact, Hiram either moved to New York or he had a minor traffic accident where he lost all of his memory for good and now lives as Ram Rod and works as a trainer at Penelope's newly acquired boxing gym. Everyone is confused about it but doesn't care to ask.)

Veronica is successful at whatever she's doing and doesn't plan on ever moving back to Riverdale, but maybe something is up at Pop's that requires her checking up on in person and she just happens to cross paths with Betty who is also just there for the weekend. And they haven't had quality time together for years, because it's so hard to stay in contact sometimes even with people you love so much you'd die to keep them safe.

If I could come up with something meaningful for them to catch up on emotionally, I'd have them sitting together in a booth at Pop's for a whole episode just talking (but I'm not that deep).

Veronica might be engaged, but we see it fall through without really getting to meet the guy. She mostly just talks to Betty about him on occasion but in a somewhat messed up way. Ultimately, she realises how she treats him in some regards like Hiram treated her and her mother. She wants to grow up further and not be like her father anymore. Since the fiance was only a trophy pawn, she breaks it off and concentrates on introspection/ maybe therapy for a bit.

Later that season her sister comes back and surprise: Hermosa embraced becoming Daddy.

(These would have to be restricted to two half episodes only, she definitely deserves story arcs that aren't about her dad.)

Careerwise: she has a couple businesses, maybe a restaurant chain or a franchise and she seems to collect startups. She reinvests a lot and has to travel quite a bit but can work remotely too.

Everyone seems to want FBI agent Betty and if I'd go that route I'd have her demask Charles as the fraude fake FBI who hires guns for hire and fake emergency teams while making up fantasy horror stories about serial killer genes to scare his biological family into killing each other that I wholeheartedly believe he is. But I also like Betty's interest in mechanics and would love for her to have a career in mechanical engineering. Maybe she switched majors at uni and now works for a company developing prosthetics. Maybe she tries to get Eric into joining a study. (I mean, prosthetic legs would help his work as a fire fighter...).

She's in town to visit Polly and the twins but after talking to Veronica she spontaneously stays in town. She can do her work remotely, really. The two of them move into a two bedroom 'shared bnb' (or whatever it was called in season two) and we finally get to see their friendship on screen.

Betty isn't in a relationship at the moment abd she's so into her work, she isn't looking for one either.

Jughead had broken up with Betty seven years ago and never really had a well working relationship after. He's grown obsessed with finding a way to recreate what he had with Betty.

Not in a totally creepy psycho way, he's simply not understanding that he might be sex positive and he had been in love with Betty, but he is ace and quite aro, too. It doesn't help, that he finds people sexually attractive on their online profiles just to be repulsed by the tought of even kissing them goodbye in person.

(I don't think tv is generally a fitting medium for this, but I guess he can narrate for himself and make it work.)

I guess he has to be an author. Obsessed as he is about finding love again (he wouldn't call it like that) he figures it had either been the location or the constant fear for his life. He chooses to return to Riverdale. He probably instantly moves with everything he owns to Riverdale (not that it's much beside a modern laptop, the typewriter and his camera).

Archie gives the great advice how Jughead is obviously still innlove with Betty, duh.

He of course runs into Betty some day, they end up investigating some random murder together and find themselves in familiar positions and kiss - but it just isn't there anymore. Jughead feels nothing and Betty isn't really into it either.

Veronica later points him in the direction of maybe not being allo (because she used to question herself as aro).

Funfact: Jughead would have failed graduation with Archie if Mr Honey didn't forge some records that weren't actually submitted from Stonewall (they claim all records were deleted during a power outage). Jughead knows and is deeply shamed.

Thornhill has been renovated! Toni is pregnant! Choni will be raising their kids (surprise, it's going to be twins!) in Cheryl's ancestral home. Choni are married and happy.

Toni has reopened the White Worm with Fangs somewhere at the Southside and yes, let's make her the official Serpent Queen. Let her work lots of social causes (remember toys for tots?), grey area rule bending for good and of course she works well with Gladys. I've seen talk about her being a social worker floating around and honestly, I think that works amazing. She's working the local cases (and a few unofficial ones) and I think she and Cheryl are registered foster parents. On occasion (like once) they'd be shown taking care of a random kid.

Cheryl used her College time to study two things: business and Riverdale town history. Remember how in season two she took so much pride in her ancestors because she believed them to be good people? She might be disillusioned but she is the Blossom heiress and her and Toni's as well as Jason's kids will one day inherit a better family legacy. She'll invest in Southside rebuilding projects, advocate for new town memorials, maybe rebrand some of the Blossom product lines. Something like that

She won't run for mayor yet, but she's definitely invested in (local) politics.

Of course the pregnancy was with artificial insemination, the donor was either an unsuspecting red head from the Greendale Sperm Bank or they use some of Jason's that has surly been saved to guarantee the Blossom line when everywhere was scary talk about sperm counts going down due to mobile phones.

In addition: the maple factories need worker bees! Cheryl has a few programs with Toni to get Serpents/random Riverdalians newly released from prison or just with bad luck into a steady job and a cushy appartement overlooking the ex prison on the Southside. Pop's is also participating. Ethel works as a landlady for said appartement complex.

Also, why not add a second Blossom-Topaz lovestory to underline this incest-adjacent show and bring back Toni's grandpa and set him up with Nana Blossom. XD

Then during this season's arc, the Blossom uncle's corpse will be found in the river and the mistery is whether the FBI will figure out who the corpse us and what happened or not.

I love Reggie. Since Varchie is unlikely thanks to Eric, him and Veronica rekindling their relationship would definitely be a possibility I'm into, but he also seems to have an interesting connection with Kevin and Fangs that could be built on.

He would definitely have a car he'd love very much and I think it would still be Bella.

I'm not sure about his career, but it wouldn't include his father's car dealership. Maybe he'd be a successful movie star just in town between movie shootings.

Kevin was doing something with musicals on Katy Keene, I think? Writing or directing? He was trying to nake it big, but some plans fell through. Now he's back in Riverdale. Luckily, they are just about to open Riverdale's first theater in the relatively newly built but forever closed prison. Next to the Southside Theater the complex holds a mall and the White Worm.

Fangs works full time as the manager of the WW that he co-owns with Toni. He meets Kevin again once he's back in town.

Sweet-Pea somehow ended up as a junior doctor at the Riverdale hospital. He spends all of his scarce free time at the WW.

Some of the background Pretty Poisons officially work for the police now. Different than Gladys, they are actually ccccc for the positions they hold.

Peaches works as a manager for one of Cheryl's companies. She's happily married and has a kid (or something).

How long in prison do you get in the US for standing in as the head figure of a crazy pen and paper cult that has literal murders committed in his name? As a blond white dude probably just parole? So honestly, once they actually bring his case to court (and they have nothing against him because anyone could have been under the mask at any one time and people know of different gargoyle kings) he's released of all charges. No one in Riverdale actually knows though since his case took forever, Bughead had already left Riverdale and Alice didn't step up to follow the case. No one wrote about it, so no one knows. They just assume that of course the guy will be locked away forever, he's guilty.

In reality, he and Charles have bought a house somewhere in a different street of Riverdale where they aren't quite known and have adopted a couple kids.

Charles meets Alice regularly for lunch and she thinks he's this workaholic FBI agent only living for solving crime. They play a long con game I don't know the goal of.

(They have been behind the tapes even if that storyline gets totally ignored. They pretend FP being in exile is their doing, but the tape responsible was just a random security camera in the area.)

Josie's plans in New York sadly fell through (I haven't seen any Katy Keene but I want her back)

Lot's of bonding scenes with her brother Kevin who's also back in town. The two share a flat and on occasion burst into song together. Since I've already invented the Southside Theater, maybe she'd find a job there, too.

Val and Melody stayed in Riverdale aftee highschool and made careers in town for themselves. Maybe Melody at city hall and Val as a marketing specialist at the farm, Riverdale's most outstanding new grocery mart. Half of all Riverdalians don't get the controversy of the name, the others either think it's brilliant or tasteless. (Kevin for example has repressed the nemories so gard, he doesn't get it. Josie is very protective and angry at Val for working there.) The store belongs to the eccentric redhaired Eva Everafter or whatever pseudonym Evelyn can come up with to thinly hide her identity behind.

Somewhere in it I'd throw in a few lines vaguely referencing older happenings like "I still can't drink tap water" and the very first time Veronica sees Archie again after seven years she identifies him through his ab muscles.

So in short: Archie would be very dumb, everyone else is just there.

Also: Pop's would serve 50% vegan burgers and milkshakes so I could dig in with gusto.

#riverdale speculation #riverdale fanfiction #riverdale #asks #arsenicpanda #fun #my writing #i guess

[mulderspice]

have you ever watched an episode of the Emmy award winning sci-fi drama, The X Files?  Maybe you’ve read my original post and yet you’re still wondering where the hell Fox Mulder got all those strands of hair on his jumbo gigantic head.  I am back and here to help you find the answers to some of your burning questions; as we celebrate the hard work and triumphs of the hair and makeup department on the Fox Lot and team up with my big huge brain and my New York State Cosmetology license to give the people what they want once again: another top ten guide to Mulder’s fucking hair..

upon making this post a second time (rip 😔), I realized that just about every episode (yes, every. single. one. even the ones without Mulder and the latest season where he has to share headspace with [redacted]) has its own important and iconic hair looks... You may recognize that some of these are slightly repeated from the last post but that’s ok! What I'm here to do is enforce! So lets get started..

#10 s6:e21 Field Trip: Here again we begin our journey into cosmetic superstardom with a personal favorite of mine.  Mulder rolling with the times by getting a haircut fresh off the FTF wave left our nation in fucking shambles. Can’t imagine going to see a major motion picture in theatres jam packed with Mulder’s most supreme hair looks only to come back to my tv screen to see it all gone away.  For students reading this post for educational purposes, this caused a worldwide walkout on popular salon franchise Supercuts in the year 1998.  However, a haircut didn’t necessarily mean Mulder forgot how to take care of his hair.  The precision and placement as each strand of hair perfectly outlines his jumbo head is revolutionary and inspiring.  Mushroom induced drug high? K. Lemme still grab my teasing comb and my hairspray and make sure I look presentable for when my partner walks into my apartment screaming abt “where's Mulder” and wanting “answers”.  The answer is this: this look is about giving people like myself with big heads rights and looking fuckable while doing so. 10/10 for inspiring hope.

#9 s1:e9 Space: Imagine you’re a few episodes into a show, the core plot is developing right before your eyes and you’re beginning to get to know The X Files three main characters; Fox Mulder, Dana Scully, and Mulder Hair Strands #1-3.  All is well except, you still have no clue how crucial, and critical Mulder Hair Strands 1-3 will become to the show and to your life and I am here to tell you that you are in for a very rude and bold awakening.  This message goes out to all the haters and all the people who didn’t believe Mulder’s hair was valid prior to season 4. He is here to tell you he DID know how to use dry shampoo and even the occasional blow dry oil and you can suck a dick abt it. Bold of you to assume he wouldn’t pull the round brush and the biosilk out the drawer to impress a visit to fucking NASA. 10/10 for involving science.

#8 s4:e6 Sanguinarium: I sit here writing to you today as the song ‘Handmade Heaven’ comes on shuffle; strikingly fitting for this raw and ethereal image of straight up beauty and wonder and magic and heaven in hair. This special, freshly washed and air dried smells like strawberries and sandalwood and fuckability. The look reaches through your TV and wraps its hands around your neck and sucks the life right out of you.  Are you gonna let it happen? You sure are.  Lucky for you, I just so happened to be there when the angels hand sewed each strand of hair onto his head and here’s what they had to say about it:  this is everything and more and the way Mulder has just washed his hair with fresh mountain water droplets hand collected like nothing else mattered. Put his clothes back on and went on his merry way. Can’t imagine being in Scully’s shoes ready to walk on in her partners room unannounced to go over serious case related matters and theories.  Woulda went bonkers. This truly is a handmade heaven.  Hand crafted by Mulder for Scully and for the good viewers of the globe. 10/10 for embracing me in its arms.

#7 s4:e3 Home: A look from one of primetime TV’s most notorious banned episodes.  Viewer discretion IS advised not only for the horrifying and cringeworthy content displayed in this episode, but for also making it painfully blunt to the viewer that Mulder’s hair follicles are happier and healthier than anybody else's will ever be in their lifetime.  In fact, I can feel my own hair falling out and being respawned onto HIS head as I type this and I’m sure you can too. The way the sun glistens off his golden brown strands makes me want to walk into oncoming traffic.  You might also notice how effortless this look was, as it probably only took a quick run thru with his fingers, and Mulder’s passion and need to look sexy at any time of the day at all times. It’s obvious that this kind of thing comes naturally to him, which just comes off as insulting to men everywhere. 11/10 for striking fear into men’s hearts.

#6 s4:e20 Small Potatoes: Genuinely took every bone and nerve ending in my body to not put this look in the top 5 even though it so clearly deserves it.  Here at mulderspice we believe in diversity, meaning it wouldn’t be right to make my top five greatest hairstyles ever produced on The X Files just of Mulder’s iconic and revolutionizing middle part (though really who is stopping me..). This screenshot in general has me up in arms at how perfectly the blue background matches his eyes, and how it accentuates his hydrated skin and lips.  But you’re not here for that. It’s the hair particularly that really pulls the shot together, as Mulder took the time that morning to spray it with some tinted dry shampoo that most defiantly and absolutely smells like chocolate.   This look feels like a warm hug on a frigid winter day. I feel EMBRACED and I feel CARED FOR thanks to the wonderful staff and team @ Mulder’s head and hair follicles. What the fuck could be better than this. 16/10 for making me feel some type of way.

#5 s4:e8 Tunguska: Currently you may not think anything of Krycek to the left of this image though ill have you know he plays an extremely vital part of this look and all the words I’m about to speak to you directly. So listen up: Krycek may have heroically slayed Mulder’s father in cold blooded and justifiable murder, but we thank him for this, as it caused Mulder to lash out in the best way possible: through looks. “Un-shun: Krycek do you think I’m good to bring my Redkin Rewind 6 styling paste with me or will the Russian TSA think of that as contraband? :Re-shun”.  A sweaty, manly and highly illegal treck through a Russian testing facility and a stint in a violent foreign PRISON surely was not going to stop Mulder from keeping his hair properly hydrated, styled and parted. That’ll really ruffle Krycek’s feathers and make him feel sorry for what he did…. The sexiest way to avenge the death of your deadbeat father. 24/10 for you know why.

#4 s1:e6 Shadows: In the year 1993, Mulder steps onto the scene, young, fresh faced, bright eyed and ready to give men around the globe what they (so desperately) needed: the encouragement to care about their hair.  Any backstreet boy you may know have this scene to thank directly, as this is what encouraged them to reproduce Mulder’s hair onto their own heads time and time again.  What I would give to see with my own eyes Mulder length times width times height his head to equal this perfectly proportionate look of volume and sexy. And who can I write a warrant out to for allowing this shot to take place.  Oh to be the various and expensive hair care products in Mulder’s bathroom …… 899/10 for starting a movement (-1 for making us do equations).

#3: s1:e10 Fallen Angel: The biggest regret I’ve ever had in my short little life was not adding this moment to the last post.  And tumblr deleted it in order to give me this opportunity to present this to you today.  By the way, that absolutely is in fact a choir of angels singing as you view this image. Go ahead and try to think of something on this earth that could be better than this tossled bed headed im-stressed-becos-my-partner-of-2-weeks-isn’t-seeing-the-big-picture-about-how-we’re-all-key-pawns-in-an-ongoing-government-conspiracy hairstyle hand crafted by Mulder all while holding his head in his hands hard at work trying to break through to the truth.  Scully [insert photo of Scully with her eyes popping out of her head here] and I both wanna rip our own hair out and throw it in the garbage. 2000/10 for making our hearts ache..

#2: s4:e10 Paper Hearts: Behold- the image I’m slamming down on the desk at full force when I finally get myself a therapist. I need a licensed professional doctor to help me understand the various angles that this purposeful shot affects my life health and well being. In a paranoia induced out of body experience Mulder took his pinky finger and parted his hair down the middle, took a protractor to perfectly round the tendrils falling ever so gracefully on his forehead and ran out of his apartment and through the woods of DC.  Doesn’t matter if he’s crazy? Doesn’t matter if its fuck all 4am? Who knows if the discoveries of this night is finally going to answer the heartbreaking questions regarding Mulder’s baby sister? Fuck it we’re just gonna make sure Scully has something to look forward to after being awoken yet again in the middle of the night and asked to come wrangle and control this stupid idiot.  This just makes me unhinged.  50000/10 for waking up in the middle of the night and doing the most for us all.  

#1 s4:e3 Teliko: This one will remain number one for as long as I shall live.  I’ve dedicated my life to this cause and I’m ready to make you painfully aware of it. Grab a pen and paper and get ready to do some heavy math with me because this look right in front of your eyes is the equation to happiness and sexiness. Can barely find the words to describe to you how this picture makes me feel. Each strand of hair is personally reaching down and wrapping his head in one big giant hug of protection and solitude.  Unbelievable that Scully didn’t head back to her hotel room and scream at the top of her lungs right after this. There’s no way she went about her day as normal without wanting to kick the shit out of him and then put him back together with soft feathery kisses.  What you are witnessing here is the very turning point of the show where Scully looked into into the very center point of that part and said “guess I have no choice but to fall in love with him 🚶🏽‍♂️”. Chris Carter’s idealistic version of Mulder and the one we actually ended ups seeing as viewers were so drastically different that it’s blatantly clear that he had absolutely no idea the cultural implications that were about to rock the world to its core and tip it on its axis when David Duchovny showed up on set looking like this. I could write a thesis about this. I could conduct research and studies about this.  I got kicked out of college because I cared more about this than I did actual schoolwork. I feel like I’m in a very sexy chokehold. Wish I could live forever in one little square pixel of this image.  Nothing means more to me than this.  1000000/10 no further comments.

and the honorable mentions go to....

s8:e16 Three Words: Dead? Did you die? Did you die and miraculously defy god by rising from the dead and coming back to life? Just got home from the morgue? Think nothing is the same? Left guessing if you’re a soon to be 5 minute father? Did you just fucking die? He’s lost his family and his job and the world just went on without him like it was nobody’s business.  Walked out of the morgue right to his apartment and what did he have left? His expensive array of hair styling and finishing products that’s what the fuck he had left.  Being an all around reject from society didn’t at all stop him from taking his fingers and dipping it into that Big Sexy styling pomade and fluffing his head to high heavens. As a personal fuck you to god and to John Doggett too.  He’ll never let you know the emotional hellstorm going on in his life in that moment but he WILL make it known to you that despite being 8 feet under ground for 6 months he’ll never give up on his hair. For the PEOPLE. Try and go through the nightmare of death and then rejected fatherhood and see if you come out of it with any hair at ALL.  An itty bitty glimpse into what would have been Untitled Mulder Abduction Story (2001)....

I Want To Believe (2008): Here you will see the sluttiest moment in major motion picture history.  Shh im not using this opportunity to show you this screenshot for the 800th time I’m trying to keep you educated.  BREAKING NEWS; Man hiding in home office for 6 years fully off the grid has FULL head of hair and is getting regular sex *not clickbait*. So what if Mulder has gone fully unhinged and off the walls bonkers he’s also gone FULL slut and it shows in that sexy thick voluminous head of slut hair.  If you ever for a second thought prior to seeing this movie for the first time that Mulder would show up a full on son-less wreck and a half think the fuck again babes.  He’s managed to hold on to every single little strand ever grown on his head even well into his middle aged madness and its about time we give him the credit he deserves.  (PS. Please know I wrote this entire spiel without even viewing the shot shown here. Its just permanently etched on the inside of my forehead so its there when my eyes roll back into my head.)  For this we say…..; Whore rights.

s11:e3 Plus One: Incase you were unaware, I have been going through a very slow and painful process of erasing Season 11 from my brain completely.  Its been a long road but its achievable and the end result will save me from a lot of future heartache and trauma.  This however, is a moment I will cherish forever and though you may think its for the hot sex (which is like maybe 30% the case) its actually because it puts together everything I’ve ever loved and believed about the show in only a few thousand pixels. How old is Mulder here? 30? 31? Still has hair and still has an unbelievable amount of love to shower Scully in for as long as they both shall live (which lets face it, she deserves one million times over.)  What this has taught me was to hang up my “Mulder deserved…” hat for good and just be thankful for what I’ve got. I ended up with no son or happy dreamy ending where Mulder gets to die with a family he’s never had in his life, but here we are left with the little things.. Like Mulder and Scully’s unconditional love and most importantly .. The hair on Mulder’s head. Its called growth and acceptance and I am learning it.  Also I just wanted to show you what it would look like if you were like 57 and sexy and still had all ur hair. That’s it :-)

#and this one i SAVED!!!!! enjoy #here at mulderspice

[heauxplesslydevoted]

Boundaries (Liam x MC)

Summary: Kendall and Liam have a heart to heart about the pressures of the throne and the duties that come with being queen.

A/N: Umm......I am a major TRR fangirl, but the writing for The Royal Heir is a bit...intense. So I just had to write something. My MC’s name is Kendall Mason.

Trigger Warning: Mentions of fertility issues/pregnancy loss. Readers discretion advised.

Kendall knew being the Queen was going to be difficult. Dealing with the people at court, the citizens of Valtoria, all of the people of Cordonia, and foreign royalty and dignitaries was a lot, but she handled it well. After a photo leaking scandal, a conspiracy plot orchestrated by the former king, and multiple kidnapping and assassination attempts, there wasn’t much that could rattle her.

Except the pressure of producing an heir to the throne.

Kendall knew she and Liam were expected to have a baby as soon as possible, but the pressure to conceive started on their honeymoon. And the pressure only got worse. Everyone in Cordonia became so invasive and acted as if they were her OB/GYN, giving unnecessary and unwanted advice and opinions. But she took it all in stride, smiling enthusiastically and thanking everyone nonetheless.

Three months into their marriage, they found out that she was 6 weeks pregnant. To say they were excited was a complete understatement. Kendall was afraid Liam’s heart would actually explode from too much happiness. They agreed to keep it a secret for a while, with only Kendall’s obstetrician being privy to the news. They wanted to have some time to themselves, before the rest of Cordonia found out.

But a few short weeks later, Kendall awoke to a pool of blood in their bed, and unbearable stomach pain. After discreetly making their way to the hospital and running a few tests, Dr. Ramirez came back with the sad news: they lost the baby.

She was very sweet and said all the right things. “It wasn’t your fault, Your Majesty, sometimes these things are predetermined at conception. You’re in perfect health, you and King Liam can start trying again as soon as next month.”

Kendall only knew about the pregnancy for less than a month, but that didn’t ease the hurt. It was her baby and she wanted it so badly.

She and Liam didn’t spend much time grieving though. They were the king and queen, the country needed them to be strong and united. They threw themselves into work and decided that they would just keep trying once the doctor gave them the go-ahead.

That was a year ago, and Kendall still wasn’t pregnant.

It didn’t help that everyone was constantly reminding her of that. Every time she drank or didn’t drink at a party, every time she wore a loose fitting blouse, every time she ate sushi, people were whispering and staring. The faux-sympathetic frowns and sugary sweet tones people took on as they said, “So you still aren’t pregnant?” It was all annoying. 

And tonight was no exception. Kendall was hosting a grand party at her home in Valtoria to celebrate the upcoming nuptials of Olivia and Drake. And while she usually loved hosting a big party and being lauded for her impressive hostess skills, she didn’t like being gossip fodder. But she was trying to stay positive and above the fray, because the night wasn’t about her, it was about Olivia and Drake.

“I gotta hand it to you, Mason, you know how to throw a party,” Drake said enthusiastically. He and Kendall were standing next to the bar that had been set up in one of the far corners of the ballroom.

“You aren’t that hard to please,” Kendall said with a laugh. “A Drake Walker party only needs two things: whiskey and red meat.”

Drake gestured to the plate of ribs he was holding, “And you nailed it on both accounts! You even managed to make Olivia happy, a rare feat.”

Olivia had been overjoyed when Kendall set up an axe-throwing area on the back grounds of the estate. Drake had to pull her away after a solid 45 minutes.

“She’s not that hard to read either.”

“Well thank you,” Drake said. “This party is amazing.”

“It’s missing a sword sharpening station, but I suppose it’s okay,” another voice cut in. Drake and Kendall turned around and saw Olivia standing behind them.

Kendall rolled her eyes. “You know you love it.”

Olivia opened her mouth to retort, but she nodded. “I do. Thank you.”

“Well, who would’ve thought that you two would ever get together, much less engaged? I had to go all out.”

Drake sling his arm around Olivia’s waist and pulled her into his side, dropping a kiss on her temple. Olivia tried to break away, but Drake held on tight. He knew she secretly loved the PDA, despite how much she pretended to protest.

A server walked by, holding a tray of wine. It was the same sparkling wine Kendall and Liam served at their wedding. Plucking a glass off of the tray, Kendall lifted it to the couple in salute. “If you two will excuse me, I should go mingle. Enjoy the rest of your party!”

On the other side of the ballroom, Kendall spotted Hana, Bertrand, and Liam talking. Sending her presence, Liam looked up and locked eyes with Kendall. He gave her a small wink. Before she could make a beeline to where they were, she was stopped by an elderly woman. She was short, wore a bright red shawl and chunky jewelry, and had her hair wrapped into a tight bun at the base of her neck. The woman grabbed Kendall by the wrist, catching her by surprise.

“Hello,” Kendall greeted. “Can I help you with something?”

“No, but I think I can help you, Your Majesty.”

“I don’t–”

“My name is Calista, and I’m a local herbalist.”

“Oh. Well, it’s nice to meet you, Calista.”

“You’re so pretty, dearie,” Calista complimented, gently patting the young queen on her hand.

“Thank you, you’re too kind.”

“I’m sure the king can’t keep his hands off of you most of the time.”

Kendall was taken aback by the older woman’s brazenness. A few people standing around not-so-subtly lowered their voices or stopped talking altogether, hoping to be able to catch a snippet of the conversation.

She stammered for a bit, at a total loss for words. Did this woman, a stranger, really attempt to strike up a conversation about her sex life with Liam? In public?

“Now, I’ve noticed that you and the King are still not with child. Not even just me, everyone has.”

Kendall dug her nails into the palm of her hand, trying to keep herself calm. “Well yes but–”

“I have the perfect solution for you!” Calista cut in, excitedly. Reaching into her bag, she pulled out two tiny tin cans and handed them to Kendall.

“What is this?” Kendall asked, confused.

“This one,” Calista tapped on the tin can in Kendall’s right hand, “is a detox tea. You probably can’t get pregnant because lord only knows what kind of toxins and impurities are in your system right now.”

“Excuse me?”

“This will clean you right out, and get your body into optimal baby making help,” Calista continued, completely oblivious to the fact that Kendall was not enjoying this conversation at all. “And this one is my own special fertility tea. I’ve been making it for over 40 years, and have had nothing but success. It has raspberry, cinnamon, chamomile, and a few other secret ingredients I can’t give out. It's a fool-proof combination. If this doesn’t get you pregnant within a month, then you might be a lost cause.”

She could hear a few ladies in the background gasp and snicker at the dig. In that moment, she became acutely aware of the people around her. The way she was being openly mocked, the way a random noblewoman whispering to her friend.

“God, how tragically embarrassing is this scene? This crazy old bat accosting Kendall like this?”

“Hell, I’m all for it if it can make Kendall actually do her job and get pregnant.”

Kendall wanted to turn around and tell those women to address her by her proper title and to get the fuck out of her house, but she didn’t even have to time gather her thoughts because they started talking again.

“He should’ve just stayed with Madeleine.”

“Karina, you’re horrible!

“What? You and I both know she’s an overachiever and would’ve been pregnant by now. With twins!”

The women dissolved into a fit of giggles and Kendall felt the sting of tears behind her eyes. Trying not to cause a scene and give the people more of a reason to talk, she simply turned around and walked out of the ballroom, ignoring her guests. 

Across the ballroom, Liam looked through the crowd of people, expecting to see his wife walk towards him. Instead he saw her hastily turn to leave and practically run out of the room.

“Where’s Kendall going?” He asked, watching her leave.

“Who knows,” Hana said with a shrug. “She’s the hostess, she’s probably being pulled in a million different directions.”

“Oh yes,” Bertrand agreed. “I remember the days of throwing extravagant balls at that Beaumont estate. No matter how much you do, there’s always more to be done. You never get the chance to actually enjoy the party. And I can’t imagine the pressure of having to throw a party in Olivia’s honor.”

Liam nodded. That made sense, but he still wanted to see for himself. He smiled at his two friends. “If you two will excuse me, I’ll go find her and see if I can be of any assistance.”

He quickly weaved through the throngs of people, trying to keep up Kendall. She was moving a lot faster than he anticipated. “Kendall?”

She just ignored him and kept walking. She walked into their master suite, slamming the door behind her.

He opened the door to their bedroom, but he didn’t see Kendall anywhere. “Kendall?” Scanning the bedroom, he saw the double doors leading to the balcony were open.

After closing and locking the door, he stepped out onto the balcony. Kendall was out there, leaning over the edge, overlooking the view.

“Kendall, darling, I’ve been following and calling out for you. You didn’t notice?” Kendall turned around and saw tears streaming down her face. “Kendall! Why are you crying, my love?”

Kendall shook her head, as if she was willing herself to not cry. “Nothing, it’s nothing.”

“Clearly it’s something,” Liam argued. He closed the gap between them and cradled her face between his hands. “What’s wrong?”

“I was heading over to talk to you in the ballroom over and some lady stopped me, and segwayed into a very inappropriate conversation about our lack of children. She all but told me that my body is some sort of toxic wasteland and that I was a lost cause, and she gave me some of her shitty laxative tea.”

“She said that to you?”

“Not in those exact words, no. I was paraphrasing. I probably could’ve handled it if she wasn’t so public and obnoxious. I could see everyone around us laughing at me. Someone even said you should’ve stayed with Madeleine because she would’ve produced an heir by now.”

Liam’s eyes darkened. “Who said that?”

“I don’t know, some aristocrat. It doesn’t matter, because I’m sure she’s not the only one who’s thinking about it.”

“Surely you aren’t buying into such ridiculous drivel.” Kendall didn’t reply. “Kendall…”

“You have no idea what it’s like, Liam, the pressure isn’t on you, it’s on me. It’s hard to stay above the fray and not buy into the drivel as you do put it. The invasiveness, the entitlement, it’s overwhelming. These people don’t even see me as a human being anymore, I’m just an incubator. My “duty” is to give you an heir, and I haven’t done it yet, so the respect for me is at an all time low. They see me as worthless, as a bad investment. Never mind the fact that I’ve already been pregnant and lost a baby. Never mind the fact that I’ve completely changed my diet and exercise routine, and I don’t drink caffeine anymore, and I’ve made my doctor test every reproductive organ that I have. And on top of all of that, I still have to be the queen. I still attend every council meeting, every gala, every royal tour. But hell, they probably wouldn’t even care if they knew. They’d still see me as a failure. I’m doing the best that I can, but my best is good enough.”

Liam wrapped his arms around Kendall’s waist and pulled her into a tight embrace. He could feel her tears soaking through his shirt, but he didn’t care. “I’m so sorry you feel like that.”

“Trust, no one is more aware than me of the fact that I haven’t successfully produced an heir,” Kendall continued. “I don’t need to be beat over the head with it.”

Liam pulled away from the hug, and instead grabbed Kendall’s small hand in his larger one. He gently tugged until they were walking back into their room. Once they made it to the bed, he sat down. “Lay down.”

“Excuse me?”

“Lay down,” Liam repeated.

“Liam, we have over 150 guests in our ballroom right now, I’m not going to bed.”

“I don’t care about the guests. I don’t care about you being the hostess, the duchess, or the queen right now. So can you please get in bed?”

After a mini stare down, Kendall humored her husband and got in the bed. He took her feet and gently placed them into his lap, unbuckling the strappy heels and tossing them to the floor.

“Hey, those are Jimmy Choo!”

Liam lifted one of her legs and dropped a kiss onto her ankle. “If they’re ruined, I’ll buy you another pair, my love.”

“I’ll hold you to that.”

Liam carefully moved her feet out of his lap. He crawled to the top of the bed where Kendall was laying and pulled her in to him, her head landing on his chest. He gently threaded his fingers through her long dark hair, stopping at the base of her head to massage her scalp.

They stayed like that for a few minutes, not saying anything, just enjoying each other’s company.

“I’m sorry,” Liam said, breaking the silence. “I hate that you’ve been under such stress and that you don’t feel supported by the people around us.”

“You don’t have anything to apologize for.”

“I do. In theory, I know how difficult the first year is for a new queen. And even though you’re doing a brilliant job, I should’ve made you feel more comfortable, especially after the miscarriage. I should’ve eased the pressure because you were thrown into the deep end and you’re feeling it from every angle right now.”

“It’s not your fault. I wanted to throw myself into work. I didn’t want to dwell on that.”

“I love you, Kendall Juliette Mason. I love you more than anything else, more than anyone else. You are my entire world, and there’s nothing you can do that will ever change that.”

“Nothing?”

“Nothing,” Liam confirmed. “You’re the love of my life. And if you ever feel overwhelmed or pressured by anyone, come to me. But I’ll also check in more. Does that sound fair?”

Kendall nodded. “Yes.”

“And we’re taking a break, from this whole baby making thing.”

“What?” Kendall propped herself up by her elbows and looked at her husband. “We can do that?”

“We’re the king and queen.”

“Exactly.”

“I love you, and your health and well-being are my only priority. I don’t need you running yourself into the ground because Cordonia is demanding an heir. And if it’s meant to happen, we will have them when the time is right. You need to take the pressure off of yourself.”

“Easier said than done.”

“I know. But I’ll help you in whatever way I can. So for six months, how about we just be a regular newlywed couple. No more of you eating a diet you clearly hate, no more ovulation calendars, no more extremely regulated sex.”

“You’d really be okay with that? With putting a pause on the family planning?”

“Yes,” Liam answered, not a hint of hesitation in his voice. 

Kendall couldn’t even begin to describe the relief that rolled through her body at her husband’s words. If felt like a 50 pound weight had been lifted off her shoulders. She leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss on Liam’s lips. “I love you,” she said after pulling away.

“I love you more, my queen,” Liam replied with a warm smile. “Now, I say we end this party, send everyone on their way, and curl into bed and watch one of those silly American reality tv-shows you love so much.”

Kendall broke out into a grin. “That sounds perfect.”

~~/~~

The next morning, Kendall woke up to the soft sunlight streaming through the windows and not her usual alarm clock. Rolling over, instead of finding Liam beside her, she was met with the cold sheets. Sitting up, she noticed that his side of the bed was fully made up and he was nowhere to be found.

She did notice a fresh newspaper sitting on her bedside table. Picking it up, the first thing she noticed was a picture of Liam. The headline read: King Liam Issues Warning About Privacy

From the communications office of His Majesty, King Liam:

Hello my fellow Cordonians. 

I know this is a bit unorthodox, but I thought writing my thoughts down would be better than struggling to speak about them.

First off, I just want to say thank you for all of the support regarding my ascension to the throne and subsequent marriage to my beautiful wife, Her Majesty, Queen Kendall. The support of our people means more to us than you could possibly know.

But it has become increasingly apparent that lines have been crossed and boundaries have been disrespected. As public figures and public people, Queen Kendall and I know all too well that our lives require a certain level of give and take between ourselves and the public. And we fully understand that the Cordonian people are eagerly awaiting the news of an heir to the throne. While the eagerness is respected and reciprocated on our part as well, some things have gone too far. The excitement has turned into gossip and downright bullying. Above all else, the Queen is a human being who deserves the same basic decency and right to privacy that is awarded to all Cordonian citizens. The decision to start a family is a deeply personal one, no matter your station in life, and the Queen has been unjustly stripped of that, even more so than I. 

Let it be known, that I will absolutely not tolerate the continued disrespect and harassment of my wife, be it from our courtiers, nobles, the press, or the general public. And until we make a formal announcement ourselves, the topic of whether or not Queen Kendall and I are expecting a baby is no longer up for public discussion, and it is non negotiable.  

Thank you for taking the time to read my open letter, and I hope my warning is heeded in the immediate future.

Sincerely,

Liam, King of Cordonia

“Good morning, Sleeping Beauty.”

Kendall looked up from the newspaper and saw Liam standing in their doorway, leaning against the frame.

She held up the newspaper. “You did this?”

“I did.”

“When?”

“After all of our guests left and you fell asleep,” Liam answered. “And the editor of the Cordonian Times wasn’t going to say no to an exclusive from the King.”

“You really did all of that for me?”

Liam stepped fully into the room, shutting the door behind him. “Kendall, I’d bring you the stars in the sky if I could. I hope what I wrote was okay. I should’ve consulted you on it first, but I was so worked up last night I just needed to–”

Kendall jumped out of the bed and practically flung herself at Liam, wrapping her legs around his waist. She pulled him into a searing kiss, her fingers interlocking at the back of his neck.

“Thank you,” Kendall said sincerely. “What you wrote is more than okay, it’s perfect.”

“You’re very welcome. Now, I have one more surprise for you.”

“You’re just spoiling me.”

“You deserve to be spoiled.”

“Okay, what's this new surprise?”

“It took a lot of maneuvering, but you and I are going to spend one glorious week on the island where we spent our honeymoon.”

“What? Are you serious?”

Liam chuckled. Whenever Kendall got too excited, her New York accent came out. He thought it was adorable. “Yes. Our amazing council will hold down the fort in our absence, as will Regina, if they need any additional assistance. Everyone is under strict instructions to not contact us unless this country is burning to the ground.”

Kendall smiled. “What did I do to deserve such an amazing husband?”

“You’re the amazing one. I’m just following your lead.”

“When do we leave?”

“Tonight.”

“Tonight? Oh my goodness, you really don’t give a girl much notice!”

Liam watched in amusement as Kendall ran to their spacious walk-in closet, gathering clothes to pack.

“Hey, Kendall?” He called, causing her to stop in her tracks.

She looked up. “Yes?”

“I love you.”

“I love you more,” Kendall said softly.

“Not possible.”

#choices: stories you play #playchoices #the royal romance #the royal heir #king liam #king liam x mc #fanfic #trr #trh

[lucifers-trash-stash]

Run From Me: Chapter Eight

Summary: There aren’t many solutions to escape becoming a member of The Mad Titan Thanos’ harem. All you can try to do is to run and pray he doesn’t find you.

Word Count: 5,515

Chapter Warnings: The beginning of plot, some degrading stuff, some sex talk

Run From Me Masterlist

I hummed softly to myself as I sat on the floor with Alice in Wonderland propped in my lap. My back was to the couch, and I reached up to the coffee table to grab another bit of cheese to nibble on. My legs stretched out under the table, feet swaying back and forth to the beat of the song in my head. 

The last week had not been completely horrific, surprisingly. Yes, I had zero privacy anymore besides when I was both going to the bathroom and hiding in the bathroom from Thanos when I was going stir crazy from not being let outside, but otherwise I was doing fine. He made a point of having Maw bring me a stack of Earth books from the library to keep me occupied, which worked very easily and I appreciated. Most of the time I completely ignored Thanos as he came and went. He would try to start conversations with me, but they never lasted long as I found ways to drop the subject. Ultimately he realized it was easier to leave me alone than to start a fight.

Not to say there weren’t fights. Our main one over the past few days had been a matter of my wardrobe. He insisted that I wear the dresses he provided for me, these long flowing gowns that made it difficult to move around in. Many of them were a halter dress style with an open back. My chest was covered but I felt far more comfortable in pants and shirts. That and I refused to be his little Barbie doll for him to make up and dress as he pleased. 

So he compromised. I could wear what I wanted in his room, but outside I would have to wear dresses. And considering that I hadn’t been allowed to leave his room for a week now meant I could enjoy wearing my leggings with a long sleeved shirt while I lounged around doing pretty much nothing. Besides being nagged periodically to talk to him, it wasn’t too horrible.

Except there was one thing. One teensey weensie thing. Thanos and his casual attire. It was incredibly infuriating and distracting all at once. He would only wear casual attire in his room, and I was subjected to it. Sometimes he would wear a loose fitting t-shirt that would still somehow show off his muscles. Or he would be completely shirtless, and those muscles would be completely on display. It made for incredibly conflicting emotions running through my brain. Which was why I engrossed myself into my reading as often as I could.

I was taken out of my thoughts when I heard Thanos stir at his desk and I quickly stopped humming. He passed in front of the couch and stopped, regarding me for a moment. He was wearing only a pair of high waisted training pants, baggy enough to be comfortable for normal wear. He was shirtless otherwise, his massive physique incredibly daunting. 

“Why did you stop?” He asked.

I looked back at my book, ignoring him. “Because I didn’t realize you were there.”

Thanos let out a soft grunt but didn’t push the subject further. Instead, he opted to cross the space and sit down in his chair, resting his chin on his palm and tilting his head slightly as he looked down at me. After a few moments of feeling his eyes drill into the side of my skull, I shut the book with a loud thump and turned back to him. “What?” 

“Rather irritable today, aren’t we?” He asked. He didn’t even move an inch, instead looking rather bored.

“Well I would have no idea why I would be irritable, of all things,” I said sarcastically. “It’s definitely not because I’m being kept prisoner in this fucking room and have been sleeping on a couch for a week straight.”

Thanos sighed. “Well, besides offering you a place in my bed, I don’t know what else I could suggest. I know you wouldn’t agree to that anyways. So what’s the point in arguing about it?”

“Because I want my own bed and my own room! Duh!” I said. “But you know, no point in arguing about it because you won’t give me either of those things.”

Thanos sat up and gave me a tired look. “Well then, perhaps I shouldn’t bother telling you that Proxima will be here to take you on a walk shortly-”

I suddenly sprang up onto my feet. “Wait what? Excuse me???”

A small smirk crept onto Thanos’ face. “You heard me. Unless you couldn’t bear to be apart from me.”

“Oh don’t fucking play that game you know you don’t have to offer a way out of here twice.” When Thanos narrowed his eyes, I scoffed. “Don’t look at me like that. You walked right into that one.”

Thanos let out a heavy sigh and then gestured with his hand. “Go get dressed. You’ll be her problem for a while.”

I grinned and turned to walk towards the closet Thanos had set up for me. The halter dresses didn’t even matter at this point. Even if it was only for an hour or so it was still an escape. “Mister I-Have-Patience-in-Spades needs to hire a babysitter huh?” I asked.

When I turned towards the bathroom to get dressed, he said, “Even I need a brief period of respite.”

I shut the door behind me with a smile. I wasn’t sure what I had done to earn such a reward, but I wasn’t going to question it. Yanking off my clothes, I stepped into the dress and adjusted the strap behind my neck. The fabric was soft and flowy against my skin. It felt so foreign from my normal clothes. I had a pair of sandals I was wearing already, so there wasn’t much to do besides walk out of the bathroom.

Thanos’ eyes gave me a once over as I exited, and I immediately felt the need to cross my arms over my chest. I couldn’t help the feeling that he was checking me out even though there was nothing to see. What I really wanted was my jacket and boots, but I promised I would dress how he wanted me to. And he was letting me out for a bit so obviously that meant that listening to him occasionally gave me special privileges. 

Before I could make another comment, there was a knock on the door. Thanos stood before telling them to come inside.

Proxima walked through, wearing a more casual version of her armor, which looked more like a regular black bodysuit. She bowed her head respectfully, uttering, “My Lord,” as she did. Thanos nodded, and just as Proxima stood back up to her full height, someone else walked through the door. 

Elsy. My brow furrowed in confusion as she stepped in front of Proxima and bowed to him, only she regarded him with, “Master.”

When Elsy stood up, she locked eyes with me. She gave me a big smile, and mouthed the word “Hi” as she raised her hand up a little in a half wave. She wore a purple gown that made her yellow skin pop, and she had tied her tentacle hair up in some sort of a bun that confused and intrigued me. 

“You may go now,” Thanos addressed me. 

I looked back at Elsy and then back at him. “Why didn’t you tell me Elsy was coming with us? You told me Proxima and I were going somewhere.”

“Elsy not going with you,” Thanos said firmly. 

I stared at him. He stared at me. I looked at Elsy whose smile was slightly faltering in embarrassment. I looked at Proxima, who was currently dissociating as a way to ignore having to be a part of this conversation. I looked back at Thanos.

“Are you telling me… This walk isn’t a reward?” I asked slowly. “It’s just an excuse for you to get laid???” 

Thanos glared at me as he crossed his arms over his chest. “What I do is none of your concern.”

“No it’s cool. It’s fine,” I said, waving my hand as I stomped off to the door, Proxima finally looking over at me as I approached. “No you go ahead, do your thing, you totally didn’t just insult my intelligence or anything. No that’s cool.”

I turned back towards Elsy, who gave me a pained look and whispered an apology. I spoke up again. “No Elsy, it’s no offense to you because you are a lovely ray of sunshine that hasn’t done anything wrong.” I pointed to Thanos. “But you get ALL of my offense. All of it. Fuck you. Don’t wait up. I’m going to live my best life. You know. Tied to a short leash like a dog. It’s fine.”

I stomped off while Proxima followed behind, closing the door behind her. Fuming, I grumbled curses under my breath as I picked up the pace. Before I got too far, Proxima’s hand gripped my bicep, pulling me back against her body.

“I’ll remind you that I’m the one taking you on a walk, whore,” Proxima hissed. “So you follow me, understand?”

I scoffed. “You’re still going to call me whore even after all that?” I asked. “I’m not even fucking him!”

“Perhaps if you had a name other than whore to provide, then I would refer to you by that instead.” Proxima released my arm with a harsh push and began to walk. I followed close behind.

“If this is some trick to get me to tell you my name so you can tell Thanos, then I’m not fooled,” I said. 

She snorted. “As if I care about your feud with him. Other than it meaning that I have to babysit you when he grows tired with you.”

“What a terrible burden.” We walked in silence for a moment as I continued to stew. Finally, I spoke up again, “I can’t believe he kicked me out so he could have a booty call.”

Proxima stopped walking and glared back at me. “Are you done?”

“No. I never am.”

Proxima inhaled deeply and stared down at me with her red eyes. “Why my father hasn’t murdered you yet is beyond me. You’re too much work for a fuck.”

She began to walk again and I followed. “I’m just that great, I suppose.”

“No. Hardly. Only a desperate man would keep pursuing you after this long. And Thanos is hardly desperate.” She looked over her shoulder. “So far my theory is that your only purpose is as a toy for him to amuse himself. He wants to see just how long it takes to break you. Make you dependent on him. And after a few fucks he won’t care anymore and go back to his other whores or find another pretty new toy.”

I blinked. “You’re saying I’m pretty then?”

She shook her head. “You truly are exhausting.”

After a few moments of silence, I spoke up again. “Where are we going?” I didn’t recognize the area where we were headed, and I assumed this was a private area of the ship.

She suddenly stopped at a door and I had to double back and turn around to face her. Proxima opened the door and ushered me inside. I stared around the room, a large industrial space with various hubs installed on the floor. It was cold and expansive, spanning the size of perhaps a large cafeteria. There were also various levels in the room with platforms and bridges between sections that provided a bit of a drop. 

I leaned over one of the edges and peered down, gulping when I realized that while a skilled fighter might be able to land the fall, I sure as shit wouldn’t. Proxima ignored my trepidation, instead gesturing for me to follow her across the bridge. She came to a stop beside a hub and I watched as she pressed down on it with her foot and a control panel rose from it. 

I watched for a moment as she tapped the controls before asking, “Why the hell did you take me here anyways? Did you need a sparring partner or something?”

Proxima scoffed. “No. I certainly don’t need a partner. Especially not you.”

“Then why-”

I shrieked as the floor suddenly shot up into the air out from under me, raising me up a good ten or so feet off the ground. When it finally stopped, I continued to clutch the sides of the platform for dear life, shaking like a leaf as I watched her grin smugly up at me.

“That should keep you from running off while I train.” 

“You bitch!” I screamed down at her, afraid to even sit up in case it decided to move again. 

“Thank you,” she said, smirking. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go punch things and pretend that it’s you I’m punching.”

My mouth hung open as she turned back around and ignored me. Just like that. What a bitch! God, I wanted to be like her. 

After touching commands on the screen some more, a couple of other hubs in the room began to rumble to life. Blue lights shot up from them and holographic creatures emerged, screeching in rage. I quickly sat up and pulled my feet up from the edge of the platform. They were nasty for holograms; Lovecraftian beasts that oozed, growled, and hissed. There were eyes, pus, tentacles, claws, teeth, and I was trying to figure out which parts of them I should be more terrified of.

Proxima, on the other hand, stared at them with a look of boredom. She tilted her head to the side, her neck cracking loudly as she did. She repeated with the other side before rolling her shoulders and letting out a deep sigh.

Then she ran at them. Bare handed. 

I watched in awe as the holograms appeared solid enough for her to land a kick right in the middle of one of them. It roared in pain, staggering back a bit. The other creature tried to lunge at her, but she stepped to the side and shot her hand out to grab one of its many arms, yanking back hard as she planted her foot against its back. A sickening crack reverberated through the room, the creature howling out as his arm came off clean in her hand. When she tossed it to the side, it slowly faded out. 

As I watched Proxima mindlessly hack away at these creatures with only her hands, my mind began to drift back to my own anger. Thanos got to have the time of his life balls deep in Elsy while I had to sit up on a platform with no way to get down if I didn’t want to break my legs in the process. Well, maybe not break my legs but definitely twist something.

But why did I care so much? I pondered for a moment. It certainly wasn’t jealousy. As long as I didn’t have to fuck Thanos, I was perfectly fine with the arrangement. A part of me was more hurt by the fact that I thought I was doing so well earning his trust that he finally let me out of his room. Without being under his watch, no less. 

But again, why did I care about his approval? I didn’t need his praise or his rewards. I was a prisoner. I shouldn’t want my captor’s approval, and yet I did. I just felt so… insulted. I did what he asked. My fights with him were less scream filled and had turned into annoyed banter. I thought that would have pleased him.

My face scrunched in disgust. The fact that I was even upset about this infuriated me. It meant I was getting soft. I wasn’t going to let him get what he wanted. But I had to in order to escape. That was the worst part of all of this. I wasn’t sure what part of my feelings were fabricated in order to trick him and which ones were actually genuine care for what he thought of me. 

“Sister,” a new voice called out, snapping me out of my thoughts.

I turned to the source of the voice. Two women now stood in the room, one green and one blue. The green woman tapped on the control panel, causing the beasts that Proxima was stomping into jelly on the floor disappear. The blue one glared at Proxima, who was currently looking annoyed at having to be brought out of her training. 

“Nebula,” Proxima said, addressing the blue woman. She turned and nodded to the green woman. “Gamora. What a pleasant surprise. Did you miss us so much that you had to come visit?”

“Hardly,” Nebula shot back, a scowl on her face. When I looked closer, she had something going on around her eye that I couldn’t quite make out. 

“I have some concerns from The Accuser to relay to our Father,” Gamora said.

Proxima cocked her brow. “Then why not call him?”

“It’s more complicated than that. I felt we needed to see Father in person.”

Proxima only nodded in response. 

As Nebula opened her mouth to speak again, her gaze traveled up the podium I was sitting on top of. When she finally met my eyes, her mouth hung open in confusion before turning to Proxima and yelling, “Who is that!?”

“Our Father’s newest acquisition,” Proxima replied calmly. “She refuses to give a name because she detests making life easier for herself.”

“Sup,” I called down.

Nebula looked visibly enraged with me, while Gamora only looked at me with a quizzical expression on her face.

“Why is she up there?” Gamora asked.

“Because Proxima’s a bitch that’s why,” I said. 

Gamora raised her eyebrow at Proxima who only shrugged in response. Gamora in a hushed tone continued, “And Father is allowing this?”

“His whores usually keep their mouths shut and their legs open,” Nebula hissed. “This one does neither.”

“The Maw brought her here as a gift,” Proxima said. “He thought a spunky little Terran slut would put up a fight for a few days and then calm down. Instead our Father is taking his sweet time breaking her and all of us suffer because of it.”

“You love me though,” I told Proxima. She glared at me but otherwise said nothing.

Nebula scoffed. “What does Father need more whores for? The Maw meddles with things he has no business meddling in.”

Proxima stepped forward, causing Nebula to flinch and stand up straighter. “That might be so. However, he is more trusted by Thanos than you, sweet sister. He has earned that privilege when you have not.” Proxima smirked. “And I am surprised that you are so confident to speak ill of Maw considering he always seems to know everything that happens even when he isn’t around.”

Nebula puffed out her chest in defiance but said nothing in retort. It was then I began to notice what was around her left eye. It was some sort of mechanical component, and I wondered if it was a cybernetic enhancement. Not too many people took to upgrading with cybernetics, but it’s a huge underground scene in the black market. It showed not only how tough you were but often gave an unfair advantage in fights. Aliens with different enhancements would fight each other to prove whose upgrades made them the most skilled, for prize money of course. I wondered if that’s why Nebula had them.

Gamora made a noise in her throat, calling everyone’s attention back to her. “This isn’t the time for petty bickering. We need to speak to Father. Where is he?”

I snorted loudly, causing them to look up at me. “Something tells me he doesn’t want to be bothered right now. Even if it is urgent.” I pondered for a second. “On second thought, please do disturb him. I hate seeing him happy.”

Nebula’s nose scrunched in disgust. Gamora’s gaze flit to the side for a moment to avoid my gaze but her face still held firm. It seemed as though their father’s proclivities for harems weren’t something they favored. Not that I blame them. I didn’t care for it either. 

“There are ways to pass the time,” Proxima spoke up, shrugging slightly. 

Nebula’s piercing stare found Proxima as her head whipped around. Her back straightened and she took a step towards Proxima, closing the gap. “I wouldn’t say no to that.”

“We don’t have the time for this.” Gamora crossed her arms.

“If you keep turning down opportunities to spar you won’t be Thanos’ favorite for long,” Proxima said. Nebula snorted at that.

Gamora narrowed her eyes at the two women and shook her head. “That tactic might provoke Nebula, but not me. I don’t care about your opinion of me.”

Nebula growled slightly under her breath but Proxima spoke up before Nebula could spit an insult back. “So what? You’re going off to bother our father anyway? Or go report to The Maw?” Proxima gave Gamora a knowing smirk. “You simply can’t get off your high pedestal for a moment to socialize with us?”

Gamora’s lips pressed together in a thin line. It almost looked like she might have given in if not for the shrill ring breaking the silence. Immediately I put my hands to my ears, hissing in pain at the suddenness of it. Gamora cringed slightly, while Nebula turned to the control panel. Proxima smirked and swiped her finger to the right, silencing the sound. 

Another hologram flashed into view from the hub on the floor. I grimaced at the sight.

“Maw, splendid timing, as always,” Proxima said with a smile.

The transparent blue Maw tapped his fingers in front of him with a slightly irritated look on his face. “I am quite aware.” Maw’s gaze fell to Nebula as she crossed her arms over her chest. His eyes fell upon Gamora next. “Lord Thanos has been informed of your arrival and wishes for your counsel with him in his throne room.”

“Oooooooo y’all are in troubleeeeeeee,” I called down, reminding everyone that I too existed here.

“And what am I supposed to do with that one, huh?” Proxima asked, gesturing up to me. “I got stuck with babysitting duty.”

Maw looked off to the side for a moment, as if he was listening to someone we couldn’t see. He then turned back to us, his pale green eyes staring up at me as he spoke, “Lord Thanos says to bring her with you. On the condition she behaves herself.”

I looked around in fake confusion and then pointed to myself. “Who, me? I always behave myself.”

“Don’t dawdle.” Maw’s figure suddenly flicked away, and I was left back in the room with the three other women. 

Without a word, Gamora turned on her heel with Nebula following close behind her. Proxima looked up at me and sighed, her fingers hovering over the control panel.

“Please don’t slam it down again,” I said, trying my best to sound pitiful. If I could get out of falling that would be great.

She stood there for a moment, fingers wavering before finally clicking the button. The panel I was sitting on moved slower this time, but it was still a bit of a rush as it sunk back into the ground. I smiled at her but she only rolled her eyes in response and walked after them.

It was a start.

------

Proxima and I entered Thanos’ massive throne room right after Gamora and Nebula. Maw, Cull, and Corvus had already arrived, watching the four of us approach. They stood in front of Thanos’ throne, placed high above them as Thanos lorded over us, as if he wasn’t tall enough already. I didn’t feel that same fear I felt seeing Thanos on his throne for the first time, but it was still an unpleasant feeling in the pit of my stomach.

I couldn’t help but smile to myself at the look of subtle irritation in Thanos’ eyes as he looked down at us. Serves him right. I mean, sucks for Elsy if they got interrupted but I felt there was some kind of justice in Thanos needing to step away to take care of some meeting.

Gamora and Nebula passed the three already standing beside the throne and knelt before him. They both called him Father as they paid their respects to him. Thanos nodded, before saying, “Welcome back, daughters.”

As Proxima held my arm, she guided me to kneel down beside Gamora. When she stepped forward with me, Thanos turned his gaze to us. “Come here.” I knew it was me he was commanding, his finger urging me closer.

Before I had the chance to look at Proxima, she let me go and pushed me towards the steps of his throne before taking her place beside Gamora. With apprehensive steps, I made my way up the stairs, feeling the eyes of everyone stabbing through my back.

When I stood in front of him, he leaned in, making sure I was focused exclusively on him. In a low voice, he asked, “Does this please you? Being trusted enough to listen to our business?”

I stared at him, confused, for a moment. Was he trying to make up for kicking me out earlier? Did he really understand the reason why I was pissed off and was letting me be here as a way of rectifying the situation? It surprised me to say the least. 

“Yes, Master,” I said, not realizing how quickly the word ‘Master’ fell off my tongue anymore.

“Good,” he said, a soft grunt in his voice. “The next time you act up, I won’t be so eager to reward you. Now sit down.”

I looked around for a brief moment. “But there’s no-” He gestured to the floor beside him, and a flash of anger ran through me. “You want me to sit at your feet?” I hissed.

Thanos responded back with only a cold stare. I bit down hard on the inside of my cheek to keep from causing a scene. He will never fucking change. He will continue to push and push until he either breaks my spirit or drives me to snap. 

So, with the nicest smile I could muster, I turned away from him and knelt down on the floor beside his legs. I sat down with my legs folded under me, thankful that the skirt of my dress was long and billowy enough to comfortably sit how I wanted.

The rest of them barely glanced at me. Like it was a common occurrence to see a whore at Thanos’ feet. Almost like a decoration that you barely notice in the room because you’ve been in that room many times before. Just a pretty object, a trinket, nothing more. Serving no value other than to be a display of the power Thanos had over myself and everyone else. We were all pawns for him, whether we were willing or otherwise. 

It made me sick.

“Rise,” Thanos commanded as the three women now stood before him. Proxima stepped back to Corvus’ side while Gamora and Nebula remained. “Daughter, what is your report?”

Just as Nebula parted her lips as if to speak, Gamora spoke up in place of her. “Ronan believes he’s found the location of the Orb.”

If the room was quiet before, this was a step beyond that. It was as if the atmosphere in the room changed. The Black Order now all looked to Thanos, shock and a hint of excitement showing in their eyes. I felt Thanos shift beside me, leaning forward in his throne. I didn’t dare look back at him, because I knew that if I looked back I would see that same deadly expression that had been haunting me ever since I’d witnessed it.

“Then why are you two still standing here?” The question was piercing, and Nebula immediately bowed her head slightly in shame to avoid his gaze. 

Gamora didn’t look as shaken up by the question, but still showed discomfort in bringing the news. “Ronan first wanted confirmation that your reward for the Orb still stands.”

Thanos inhaled sharply. The hair at the nape of my neck was standing straight up. I take it back. This was the scariest I had ever witnessed Thanos, and I couldn’t even see his face.

“I have allowed Ronan the privilege of serving me. He had the honor of assisting the training of the both of you. And I’ve allowed him to utilize the both of you in order to find the Orb.” Thanos paused for a moment. “And now you tell me that he thinks my promises are mere empty words? That he sends the two of you here to ask for verification makes me question his integrity. If he has concerns he can come to me personally and raise them. Is that understood?”

“Of course.” Gamora bowed her head. “I will call him immediately.”

“See to it that he knows of my irritation and pray he finds a way to quell it.” Thanos leans back slightly, relaxing a bit more into the throne. “You all may leave now.”

The group didn’t spend any time dawdling, and I watched as they all left me behind. I attempted to leave with them, but Thanos’ hand brushed against the back of my neck, urging me to stay behind. I couldn’t help the shiver that rose in me as his large fingers brushed gently through my hair, waiting until everyone had left in order to speak to me.

“I was not expecting such a tense discussion. You should not have been here,” Thanos said softly.

“What is so important about this Orb?” I asked, knowing full well he wouldn’t tell me.

And he didn’t, instead rubbing the tips of my hair between his fingers. “That is something you need not worry yourself about. It will be resolved soon enough.”

I sighed deeply. It was a struggle for me to attempt, but I knew this was one of the few moments I might have to lull him into trusting me more. And to do that I needed to make myself vulnerable. Make him feel like I needed him and that I couldn’t live without him. All of the things he so desperately wanted me to be, I needed to fabricate for him so he could tell me more. 

“This Ronan guy wouldn’t try to attack us or anything, right?”

If Thanos noticed a change from my normal behavior, he didn’t display it. His fingers brushed under my chin and gently tilted my head up to look up at him. His expression was neutral, but I noticed a tiny smirk on his lips. “I have not known you to be the kind of woman that scares easily. Other than our introduction in this very room.”

I ignored his last comment. “Well, that was a rather intense conversation about this Ronan and this mysterious Orb so you know,” I shrugged. “Sounded like he’s a bad guy to me.”

Thanos leaned forward a bit more, and I shifted myself to where I was facing him so I wouldn’t have to crane my neck backwards anymore. Thanos’ fingers lingered along the side of my face, drifting down to outline my neck. “Let me tell you a secret about Ronan,” he said with a knowing smile. “He has had his entire world stripped from him. All he has known is the life of a Kree Accuser, and when the Accusers were disbanded after they failed to succeed in the Kree-Skrull War, he held onto that title like a child’s security blanket. He is nothing but a petulant child throwing a tantrum. And battles are not won by children.”

Thanos’ thumb gently brushed over my cheek, grazing my bottom lip in the process. These soft touches were murder on my system. I wondered if he could feel the pounding of my heartbeat through my veins when his fingers touched my throat. Fear, hatred, and a tinge of arousal all fighting inside of my mind trying to vie for power. And I was the one stuck in the middle.

“So there is no need to worry about Ronan or any other being in the Galaxy.” Thanos began to stand up, offering me his hand as he pulled me up alongside him. “Because even if someone was suicidal enough to try to storm my ship, they would never be able to reach you or any of the others before my men slaughtered them where they stood.”

I simply nodded, and allowed him to walk beside me with his hand resting against my back, urging me to follow him. I wasn’t fully certain if this conversation helped break some more of the boundaries between us, but at this point I was too desperate to not at least try.

And I couldn’t waste any more time.

#run from me #thanos #thanos x oc #thanos x ofc #thanos fanfic #thanos fanfiction #my fanfiction

[th3okamid3mon]

Gisaengchung (Parasites) [SPOILERS]

A lovely tale on why you shouldn´t trust people!

Sinopsis: 

A family barely subsists in a basement they call home. Unemployed and at the border of misery, a job opportunity is presented to the older son Gi Woo, which consists on giving english classes to the daughter of a high class family. Step by step he gains the trust of the owner and begins to introduce his own family as workers in hopes of getting more money from them. 

Writing and characters (+some acting):

I am not very familiar of Korean movies, I´ve heard about some good movies but never actually watch any from the country. Now, I´ve heard about Bong Joon-Ho since I watch one of his previews works called Snowpiercer and even though that kind of movie is not exactly my favorite I have to admit it was really well written and the visuals were really creepy but pretty in some twisted way. 

Gisaenchung´s story is really well thought, all the details fit together like a puzzle of 500 pieces or more. It had to be meticulously written so to make some sort of sense and even then some things dont make so much sense, but Joon-Ho has a cover: this movies is a drama, suspense and dark humor movie. When you have a super dramatic rich family with their over the top reactions and mannerisms in an only drama movie it would be seen as a joke if they were trying to look serious or be taken seriously, in this case works perfectly since they are used as comic relief, specifically the rich mom being the most gullible and most dramatic of all. Their purpose is accomplish perfectly and the sheer dumb and naive nature of the mother works in favor of our bunch of vermin. 

It is a very understandable and digestible plot: you have a poor family of scammers, they get an opportunity to scam a family, they proceed to scam the rich family by pretending to be strangers to each other and working as a house keeper, a driver and 2 teachers, and then they get discovered. At the simplicity it doesnt sound that entertaining I suppose, everything in between is simple yet complex and then it goes into fucked up territory almost from 10 to 110 really quick. 

This family are assholes! Like... Complete assholes, the name of the movie is after them! They take advantage of a character that is super anxious about her children and is super naive and is really lonely because of his husband leaving for work a lot and completely destroy 2 lives in the process too! They get the husband´s driver fired by framing him as a sex addict with a kink and the housekeeper is fired by making her look like a tuberculosis patient. This people are awful! They are manipulative, dangerous, assholes! And yet... you kind of root for them? That´s how good the writing is. You know they are awful, you know they are manipulative. Hell, at the beginning they use manipulation to probably get someone fire and get money from a small pizza company they work for as box benders. AND THEY FUCKED UP AT LEAST A QUARTER OF THOSE BOXES! They are not good! 

...But who can blame them for being like that? They are living in a really bad situation, they are stealing wifi from a neighbor so they can check a WhatsApp to see if the pizza place send them a message. They were talented at sports, the daughter knows how to work with programs like photoshop and probably other types, the son is really smart reason why he was given the job as an english teacher and to be honest he is kind of good at it. They are not lazy people. The situation is not good for them and they can´t exactly get a good job due to not having a degree. It´s actually kind of sad to see their potential being wasted due to their economic situation. Of course anyone would survive in however manner they can, even if that makes them a bad person in the process. 

You have a rich family that supports and loves their children, shown as getting both of them private ¨teachers¨ (not enough love I guess, due to not fucking checking this people up in the first place and only trusting the recommendations of a college student). They aren´t bad people, they treat their workers fairly and they respect them and when there´s reason to fire someone they try to do so respectfully as not to damage their reputation or shame them (so much). You should feel sorry for them because they are so nice and are being scammed but you can´t shake the feeling that they kind of deserve it for being so naive. Well, at least not the children, those kids have 0 control over who their parents choose. THE PARENTS ARE SO DAMN DUMB! The mother specially! So anxious about your children learning and exploiting their talents but not so anxious to get the first whoever that crosses your ears? You feel bad, for them and maybe you dont get angry, they antics are not anger inducing, they are hilarious because, as i explain before, they over react A LOT. I don´t know if that was a directors decision or if the actors did what they pleased, they fit too well in the scene to not be planned.

One thing that stood out to me were the dialogues, they made sense but they became a bit descriptive in certain points.There were really good silent scenes, there was a good balance between dialogues and silence, though I don´t know why I felt certain dialogues were too much? Maybe it was with their reactions as well, Korean and older Mexican movies have a thing in common and that´s a level of exaggeration. Sometimes it´s good, sometimes it gets the spotlight and not in a good sense. With the rich family there was no problem, it was with certain characters like the daughter of the scam family that overreact in one scene. Since they were drunk it kind of made sense but it there wasn´t exactly a follow up of his outburst. it passed relatively quick so it wasn´t much of a problem. 

Sound and music: 

The dialogues were well said, there was no difference in volumes and it had no noise. The silent parts had a good sound, whether it was background noises or music, it never felt out of place. The sounds were actually relaxing at some point, specially with the rain or water flowing. It had a good crispiness on them, they sounded natural and not manufacture with materials. The music wasn´t over used or overbearing, it was mostly in the background. It wasn´t almost present in certain scenes, you could hear it but it was very low. It didn´t had weird spikes and it was kind of nice. Not exactly the most memorable. 

Photography and art: 

First... Some examples:

I mean... WOW. The different lights, the shadows, the colors, the difference in lighting from each set. EVERYTHING IS GORGEOUS. Easily identifiable, with that I mean if you see this screenshots you would probably recognize them immediately. I don´t know how original the setting is from other movies but MAN is it gorgeous. The shots are most of the time open, details are hidden in the background (even when they can be a bit blurry, sometimes there something behind), the lighting is the first thing you´ll notice. There´s so much contrast between the highlights and shadows, even though most of them are not really strong. 

The colors schemes for each place are not entirely different, I think the reason is they wanted to portray that both families have certain similarities, mostly the only difference being the living situation. It´s really interesting how you can find warm colors in both families, they all love each other, both families support each other and their interests. The parents praise their children (even though the scam family probably shouldn´t praise illegality but, meh...at that point it can be consider too late)  

The art department went OFF with this one. You can feel the filthiness and close space they live in, their living situation is bad but they manage. The other family is clean and clear and it has to be perfect that way. I think there were 2 parts where they work even harder. 

(This is a kind of Spoiler for the end) When they use blood, it tends to look fake in some movies, in here it looks really, really red and dark. The makeup for the strangled neck also was a nice touch and look really good. 

The other part I think was really well accomplish and that also might have taken FOR EVER TO MAKE IT WORK, was the flood, because it not only involved flooding and ENTIRE NEIGHBORHOOD, it involved a toilet spewing black water out as if it was puking. How did they manage to do all that? HOW MUCH WAS THE BUDGET? Geez, How many TAKES TOOK TO ACCOMPLISH THAT?! It look hella gross and the way it was spewing water was very realistic. 

There´s an entire sequence where three members of the family gets out of the rich house and walks towards their home and each step they take they descend even more, but that´s not all, it is raining and water is flowing and pouring, it looks fantastic and the neighborhood gets flooded and there´s stuff out getting fucked over. The makeup and the art design were crazy here, I wish and hope and pray they got paid well because MY GOD this was hard work at its finest. 

Conclusion: 

I need to watch more of this foreign movies and so do you! If you haven´t seen any movie out of Hollywood, you should do so. Maybe this one is a bit too much though. It goes well but there are certain parts that are a bit slow and then it goes fast and then slow again, it can be a rollercoaster and I´d be lying if i wasn´t expecting the movie to finally end. It is entertaining and it isn´t that long (2:12 hours), it doesn´t have any popular references. This movie was thought to be seen by an international audience. If you as an USA Citizen (´cause I´m not calling you Americans, America isn´t a country and USA is not the center of it) feel uncomfortable to be shown or for your culture be mock, well TOO BAD GET USED TO IT! Nah, I´m kidding. The kid in the movie has an obsession with indians and the family acts like USA is like high standard but in a mocking kind of way? My brother actually thought it was a Get Out situation so... 

This movie has a perfect blend of suspense and humor, the drama is palpable, it is there, the suspense and dark humor are the spotlight though. The actors are really good and the dialogues are not complicated to follow. It is pretty funny, heartwhrenching at points (specially the end) and entertaining movie, if you want to start watching foreign films you could start with this one. 

The worst part of the story is that both sides are right to react the way they did, and it´s kind of sad. 

This is what I took from it:  Poor or rich, it doesn´t matter. People are humans and they all have needs. And those needs will be satisfied one way or another. When you have a family, You will do whatever it takes to make them happy and sometimes drastic measures will be used. 

Go watch it, you won´t regret it. 

-Sincerely creeped out, T.O.D 

#parasite #parasitos #parasites #gisaengchung #2020 #movies #peliculas #movie 2020 #pelicula 2020 #review #thoughts #opinion #critica #critica? #review? #kind of messy #messy review #messy #drama #suspense #suspenso #dark humor #humor negro #writing #write #tod write #tod writes

[ivydcmir-blog]

☁☼☁( ****. simay barlas. cis female. 21 ). welcome back to your summer paradise, IVY DEMIR we were wondering when you’d finally show up! the town’s really missed how MESMERIZING you are, even if you can be a bit AMORAL at times. we hear back home they call you the CHERRY PIT, makes sense considering you remind everyone of IMPORTED CIGARETTES, OLD LOVE SONGS COMING FROM A RECORD PLAYER, PERFUME AT THE BASE OF A THROAT, & FAST CARS AT MIDNIGHT.  ☁☼☁    

oh she’s extra late to the party ! im she .... my name’s xan im 22 and from the est timezone i go by she / her pronouns and ur watching disney channel <3 i am....so excited to bring ivy to life ... shes been my sleep paralysis demon for weeks its time for me to set her free baby ! lets go !

first things first ivy is inspired by characters like effy from skins, georgina & serena from gossip girl, and just a TINY bit of villanelle from killing eve ( not the....assassin part.... ) 

her daddy’s side of the family are oil tycoons and her mom’s side ? well ivy has no idea what they do or who they were

basically a little after ivy turned a year old her mother just . poofed...vanished into thin air and didn’t leave a trace behind. growing up ivy would hear a lot of rumors from the staff abt what kind of person her mom was or where she went but the one person who could tell her the truth ( her dad ) just refused to talk abt it. he got super angry anytime she used to try so ivy stopped asking !

she was born in tokyo actually ( on her parents anniversary trip, which was another mystery ) but was raised in manhattan ! she is absolutely in love with nyc and definitely considers it her home

so shes filthy rich and i mean like ... disgusting billionaire rich to the point that it’s just not right and you know, that definitely shaped her upbringing. even as a little girl ivy found it very clear the amount of power she has just by being born into the right family 

she was....kind of a strange child ! she was abnormally sharp for her age and intuitive and without that maternal figure in her life, ivy grew very attached to her father. he’d even take her along to business meetings because she was well behaved

as she grew up it started to become apparent ivy liked to play games. the more she observed the people around her ( the staff, her dad, his business partners, the kids at school, etc. ) the better she got at finding out what made people tick. sometimes her games were harmless ( like flirting with the boys she knew her friends were crushing on ) and sometimes they were more intense ( like setting up empty pill bottles around her and pretending she’d overdosed to freak out the maids ) ask ivy why she did any of it and she’d simply tell you she was bored

high school ivy was very much reckless like this. she found the upper east side teen drama so dreary she’d often act out just for a change of pace. i’d like to think she broke the record for most detentions at whatever private school she went to. she was definitely someone just about everyone knew just because of all the rumors she stirred up doing crazy things 

despite all the misdemeanors she got into yale ! her dad is basically on of the biggest donors to the university. there’s probably a building somewhere on campus with her last name on it, but ivy really couldnt care less. she didnt exactly want to go to college and she definitely didnt want to leave nyc, but shes got this weird complex with her dad and really cannot tell the man no ! so she majors in classics just bc she thought it’d be neat to have to learn latin 

of course ... she starts to get bored. she’s already barely attending classes and on academic probation so when it leaks to the dean she’s sleeping with a professor ? ivy was sure it’d be expulsion.....but then it wasn’t ! turned out her dad had made a special deal with yale and after a nice monetary exchange it was like ivy never did anything....

after her dad announced he was going to turkey for his brother’s funeral last august she decided to "take a gap year” from yale but really she’s got no plan to ever go back ! instead she disappeared much like her mother did for a whole year without a trace. she told absolutely no one where she was going or what she was doing.....and she’s come back to the hamptons for the summer with no warning ! 

PERSONALITY & TIDBITS

so ivy is....all over the place ! most of the way she behaves is because she finds it a bit too easy to grow bored. still very much into playing games with people bc she gets a kick out of it ! it takes a lot for ivy to take anything seriously so she’s not exactly the best person to come to if you need advice or comfort. if you’re looking for excitement? trouble? an out of body experience ? then she is 100% your girl 

for someone so chaotic she is weirdly nostalgic and sentimental about things. she’s obsessed with greek heroes and foreign poets and superstitions and it’s not uncommon to find her getting existential with you with a cigarette dangling from her fingertips and a foggy look in her eyes. she’ll say something that seems entirely deep and profound one minute, and the next she’s blowing smoke in your face asking if you want to do a line in the bathroom with a wicked smile on her painted lips

a huge flirt ! she will and she does hit on absolutely everyone. definitely not the traditionally romantic type but she does go through phases where she tends to hyper fixate on others for specific periods of time. until she gets bored. it’s a vicious cycle

full of unhealthy habits that include drinking, smoking, doing drugs, fucking around, but the worst is how little she sleeps. she’s been prone to nightmares ever since she was a kid but she’s never acknowledged it as a problem despite it obviously being one

once she flew to paris with nothing but a cheap pink wig. wore it the whole time she was there and called herself yvette. 

picked up her father’s obsession with luxury cars. not only does she collect them, she races them, too. most infamous stint was showing up to a race in an evening gown and winning. 

speaks about five languages fluently. often likes to fuck with snobby rich people at high society events by pretending she can’t speak or understand english, only to turn around and speak to someone else in perfect english

it’s rumored she once snuck onto the yacht of a ceo to a fortune 500 company, only for him to find her in nothing but a bath towel eating chocolates while flipping through his playboy magazines, and that he was so taken with her instead of pressing charges he decided to name the boat after ivy.  

rumors are rumors, but you really never know with ivy....

thats it !!! if you’re reading this you made it !! please come plot with me i know im late but i have a lot of heart memes saved up and i cant use those by myself </3 we can message through im’s but im 100% easier to get in contact with over discord @  EL i love u 💖✨🌙#8172

#palms:intro #forgot i didnt make an ooc tag .... cute of me to forget x #this is so late and honestly ? thats so on brand for me its fine ! #spare plots anyone ? #i didnt proof read this if it makes zero sense......well thats also on brand for me /:

[unnursvanablog]

End-of-the-year review: Movies, part 1

And what I thought of them (and there are a lot of them, so I try to be brief).

(x2 means I watched it twice, or more).

Blood of the Immortal: Very bloody (but not as bloody as I had expected). Maybe a little bit unbelievable at times, but it didn't really hurt the viewing experience at all. Very good fight scenes.

It's Called Passion: Not being able to sleep got me watch this one, which turned out to be a much better than I had expected, although this journalist plot line isn't anything new.

The Greatest Showman: I think the songs are awesome and I'm still listening to them, but the story left very little impression on me. But the singing and dancing was great!

Voldemort: Origins of the Heir: It was obvious that this was done by fans for fans, which was cool, but at the same time, I found the story itself not anything special and it was weirdly dubbed and I just found it a bit odd.

Titanic: Went to a special anniversary screening, which was a very fun experience. Titanic was one of my favorite films as a teenager and even now I still think it is very good.

It (2017): It fixed some of the problems that I had with the book, but I wasn't really into it, and it didn't really scare me.

Atomic Blonde: I don't think I'm particularly fond of this type of movies, whether it's a Bond type male as the lead or a Bond type female as the lead. Just a fine action movie.

Valerian and the City of 1000 Planets: It looked so good. But everything else, other than the aesthetics and the visuals, was just so bad.

Professor Marston and the Wonder Woman: A really interesting story over there and just a gorgeous little period piece. I loved it.

Victoria and Abdul: Might be telling history with some rose-colored glasses, but I'm a sucker for period pieces, so on that aspect I did like it.

Hidden Figures: I finally watched Hidden Figures. And it was just as great as I had thought it would be (and had heard reviews about). Loved the characters, the costumes.

Dunkirk: It took me a while to understand the story, since we were always jumping around in the story. Really interesting story, but the story didn't grip me as much as I had liked.

The Handmaiden: This is probably the third or fourth time I watch this movie, and this time at the movies (an indie theater was showing it). It was a really fun experience, but this movie is so beautiful to look at and the story is awesome.

The Big Sick: great romantic comedy that would be really easy to watch over and over again. Really fun story and awesome characters.

Captain America: Civil War: The plot felt a lot slower now at a second viewing, but I still think it is one of the better superheroes movies and a great recap for the forth Avengers movie.

Black Panther: Breaks away from traditional Marvel formula and actually had an interesting villain. Passed all my expectations. The music and the colors in the pictures are great. A great movie.

Shape of Water: A strange film, but at the same time so beautiful and sincere. I loved it.

Along With the Gods (x2):  Sometimes I felt like the story had a pacing issue, or not explaining everything well enough, but I really liked the mythology and the characters and the overall feel of the movie.

Untold Scandal: Did so little for me that I had forgotten all about it.

The Mermaid: An odd movie. But a fun movie.

I Can Speak: I was not expecting this type of story, I was expecting something light and fluffy. I was not expecting to cry for an half an hour after and during the movie. It was so moving. It was brilliant.

Goodbye Christopher Robin: I liked the style of the movie a lot,and the subject matter. The story had it's moments, but I also felt like it dragged a little.

Thor Ragnarok: One of the best Marvel movies when it comes to re-watch-ability.

Forgotten: Ok-ish plot, but a bit confusing and maybe a bit rough around the edges. The actors were great.

Andið Eðlilega: A really cool story. I figures out the ending quite soon, but it did not spoil too much for me.

Annihilation: Did very little for me.

Steal Rain: I really enjoyed this movie. It was funny, moving and sad when it needed it to be and the action was really good. A great watch.

Undir Trénu: I always thought I would not like this movie, nothing about it seamed to appeal to me, but the plot got so bonkers that it was actually kinda incredible to watch.

Little Forest: Very chill movie. Cozy even. Nothing much going on, but it was a nice viewing experience.

Ingrid Goes West: Funny, a little crazy, and just a pretty good movie.

Captain America: Winter Soldier: Just a quick re-watch before the fourth Avengers movie comes out.

The Foreigner: Ok-ish thriller. Nothing more nothing less.

The Avengers: Just a quick re-watch before the fourth one came out.

Ready Player One: Sooo much nostalgia. Maybe too much nostalgia (it got that from the book), with a rather thin plot and characters.

A Quiet Place: A really great horror movie which both entertained me and scared me a little bit. Quite an original take on the horror genre.

Thelma: Sometimes I felt like it the plot moved kinda fast and then at times it dragged. But a very interesting plot.

Psychokinesis: A fucking snoozefest.

Avengers: Infinite War, part 1 (x2): Oh, boy! So long, but didn't work that long when I was watching it (the first time). Just a whole lot of fun (for the most part).

What We Do In the Shadows: I thought she was funny, but at the same time I expected her to be more funny.

1987: When The Day Comes: The plot moves around a lot. I never thought I could properly connect to any of these characters. You kinda needed to be connecting a lot of dots, so maybe it would be better at a second viewing.

Princess and the Matchmaker: Lovely and cute costume drama. I liked it.

Deadpool: A little re-watch before going to see nr. 2.

Mayhem: What a movie. Dark humor, blood and gore. I enjoyed it a lot. Funny and thrilling in all the right places.

Paddington 2 (x2): Just the cutest family movie of the year. Ugh, it's so nice to watch this movie. and she is still funny when you look at her again.

Age of Shadows: It kinda felt like someone was trying to hard. All I liked about this movie was (some of) the actors and the costumes.

The Literature and Potato-peel Society: Such a good movie! I need to watch it again. Everything I want in a period piece. Great costumes and story and scenery. And it followed the book so well.

Deadpool 2: I didn't like it as much as the first one. Didn't think it was a s funny ether. A good popcorn movie though,

#movie review #blog post

[megacircuit9universe]

Toast

THU AUG 27 2020

As the Reupublican Convention got underway this week, we had twin hurricanes, Laura and Marco both enter the Gulf of Mexico and pummel the same parts of Texas and Louisiana.

Marco wasn’t so bad, but Laura got up to a catagory 4 before making landfall, and the whole phenomenon of twin hurricanes is historically unprecedented... which is on climate change.

Meanwhile most of the west coast has been ablaze with wildfires, as has become the norm over the past four years, and in Wisconsin we had yet another innocent black man shot by police for no reason, triggering BLM protests up there, which then triggered a crazy ass white boy from Illinois to cross state lines with an assault rifle to shoot and kill two more people on the protest scene (who has since been arrested for murder, thankfully).

And of course, there’s always Covid, which continues to rage in America.

Not a great backdrop for the RNC, with Trump accepting his nomination tonight in front of a huge crowd of unmasked idiots on the front lawn of the White House (which is arguably illegal), trying to pretend everything’s fine.

At any rate, it’s now becoming clear what the two campaigns, Biden’s and Trump’s will be talking about through September and October, and it’s like this...

The GOP is focused on the civil unrest (naturally overplaying the looting) and saying the nation will not be safe from this stuff under a Biden administration... which is an extremely weak hand, given that all of this is currently happening under the Trump administration.*

The Democrats, on the other hand, are simply going to hammer on Trump for his reckless mishandling of Covid19, which has resulted in the cascading failure of our entire way of life... from record deaths, to record unemployment, record civil unrest, etcetera.

And, frankly, that’s a winning hand, because Covid hit the whole planet in 2020, and at this point, every first world, and most second and third world nations have it completley under control.  

America’s uniquely miserable experience of the pandemic is PLAINLY the result of Trump’s ineptitude.

I’ve speculated earlier this year that, in the hyperverse of worldlines where Trump inevitably snakes his way into power... the only ones who can rid themselves of him without the calamity of global war, are the few in which a pandemic strikes in his first term.

My logic was, a pandemic is one of the only things his playbook has no answer for.

And now, on the eve of September 2020, I’m certain of that much!

Trump has now shown that his grasp on what a pandemic even IS... is so absent, that he never even saw how a leader could use one to unite the public behind him.

He’s been known to speculate about how a 9/11 would be nice, or a war would be nice... because it would allow him to get that broad support for the fight against a common enemy... and yet... when that enemy is a virus... his gut reaction was to deny there was any threat, and try to change the subject.

When that didn’t work, he tried to push off the responsibility for the problem onto the governors, and then refused to help the governors... and then focused on silencing the CDC... and mentioned in passing that maybe people should inject bleach.

For a guy who was both hailed, and feared, as being a shrewd politcian, if nothing else... with a gut instinct so keen it required no mental intelligence, to manipulate the whole political system and bring democracy to it’s knees...

...he sure does have a glaring blind spot when it comes to viruses!

It’s been painfully clear for a while now that he has no idea what a virus even is... how they work... how biology works... or how such a microscopic thing could possibly destroy the economy, and lead to endless protests and riots, if ignored.

The reason for this conceptual blind spot is the same as it’s been for every wanna-be authoritarian strong man... those three core hatreds; racism, classism, and anti-intellectualism.

The brown people must go.  The poor people must be enslaved. The smart people know nothing... because I know everything! 

But dealing with a global pandemic AT ALL, demands that these hatreds be set aside. Brown people in foreign nations are getting results.  Poor people at home need financial help while in quarantine.  Smart people do know what they’re talking about when it comes to disease control.

No!  No no no no no no NOO!

In any other political situation, the blindness that comes from these core hatreds is never much of a handicap on your way to full dictatorship. It’s usually a helpful quality! 

Will there be problems for you down the line... after you’ve plunged half the world into darkness, and a global resistance finally pulls their resources together to destroy you... at the cost of millions of lives?  Sure!  But that’s only after you’ve been in power for at least a decade.

But in the special circumstance of a pandemic hitting in your first term... when you’re not done tearing down the democracy yet... when all you need is one more term to eradicate the last of those pesky checks and balances, make it legal to seek unlimited future terms, rig the fuck out of the elections with armed thugs at the poling places, etc... 

...when all you need is that one pseudo legitimate reelection and the pandemic hits...

Well, the virus does not give a fuck about your political ambitions.

And if you’re so blind that you don’t even know what a virus is, and can’t allow yourself to listen to anybody who DOES... and gut react by trying to ignore or discredit it... like it’s a guy you don’t like... or pay off big business to pretend they’re not going bankrupt because of it... or any idiotic response like that?..

...you are TOAST!

Does this mean some party, either human time travelers, their AI, aliens, or some coalition of the above, deliberately released SARS Cov2 into a heavily populated Chinese city... right after Trump was impeached... knowing it would spread around the globe in three months, and destroy any chance he had at reelection... at the cost of a couple million lives... because they felt it would save far more, and prevent far worse suffering over a far longer time period... possibly setting civilization back centuries, or even bringing it back to the stone ages?

Maybe?

I don’t like to think that’s what’s going down, but at this point, I have to admit, I can no longer rule it out... mainly because of the timing (an election year) and how it does seem to be such a crippling achillies heel for Trump, specifically.

If such a conspiracy theory were true, however, it would ultimately mean that Trump himself is a deadly virus, ravaging the multiverse with great suffering... for which Covid19 is the only proven vaccine.

How’s that for a plot twist?

Allow me to twist this further... because even if Covid is a natural occurrence in our timeline... it’s timing purely coincidental... 

...the above agents will still be taking note of it... and thus will leave it to other groups of compatriots, on other timelines, to initiate protocol P artificially, in the event of a Trump infection.

So even if our pandemic is natural... many others, on like timelines, are not.

Such... ultimately... is the nature of warfare.

And in warfare... the ones so blinded by hatred they can’t accept science... always lose to the ones who embrace science... who also tend to be the ones who have everybody’s best interests at heart.

Just saying.

Okay, time for bed.

*The GOP has, for decades, been keen on the ploy of blaming current problems on past administrations.  That really fell flat for Bush2, when, after inheriting a budget surplus from Clinton, he ran up a huge deficit and then, after two terms, saw the economy collapsing hardcore in his final year.

What they’re trying to do now... is blame current problems on a FUTURE administration, which is a first.  The riots and looting are the “result” of Biden/Harris’ mishanding of policy... next year.

Therefore... keep Trump/Pence in office and avoid this fate we are currently experiencing.

It’s the closest that idiots like this will ever get to time travel... just before history devours them.

[nanyoky]

(oc questions - all - for the Mercys?)

You got it toots!

1. What’s their full name? Why was that chosen? Does it mean anything?

Maxine Elizabeth and Leopold. Old family names.

2. Do they have any titles? How did they get them?

For the residents of the house, The Mercys is very much a title that’s used more often than either of their given names. Even in school their classmates probably referred to them together a lot of the time.

3. Did they have a good childhood? What are fond memories they have of it? What’s a bad memory? 

Not many good childhood memories outside of each other and Charlie. Both have mixed and complicated feelings about parents. ((spoilers!!! no one cares nell this isn’t a real movie)) Leo doesn’t remember much of his biological dad except things were Not Good. Max remembers her mother, but mostly remembers her being sick and being scared at hospitals and such. Their best memories are the two of them with Charlie. They could sometimes be alone with her for days at a time and it was the most peaceful time they ever had.

4. What is their relationship with their parents? What’s a good and bad memory with them? Did they know both parents? 

Not Good ™. On all counts. The exact details of the family backgrounds would ultimately depend partially on casting, but the ones I’ve toyed with most have been: Dirk is the old fashioned sort to expect his wife to care for children and for him to pat them on the head occasionally and pay for their upkeep. That never worked out so well, since Max’s mother got sick when Max was very young, then after she was gone, he was alone, then Marlene and Max did NOT get along from day one. So his and Max’s relationship was always distant and begrudging and strained. Then Marlene I’ve sort of pictured as an immigrant from somewhere- coming to the US with her first husband, then leaving him and marrying Dirk. She saw this as a lateral move at the time, but had a rude awakening upon finding that everyone in her new country sees her as an “exotic” trophy wife (she bleaches her hair but still has a strong “foreign sounding” accent). With her first husband, she was distant due to a toxic relationship and Leo didn’t receive a lot of attention. Then Marlene starting taking barbiturates and nothing ever improved. Sometimes, she would occasionally try to strike up a closer relationship with Leo, but her efforts never lasted long so he learned not to get his hopes up.

5. Do they have any siblings? What’s their names? What is their relationship with them? Has their relationship changed since they were kids to adults?

Their relationship with Charlie is an odd mix of siblings and parents/child. The age gap wasn’t enough for them truly to act as parents, but the older they got, the more they felt responsible for her. Charlie always idolized and trusted them unlike anyone else and they had an enormous sense of responsibility to live up to this. So, naturally, they have always viewed her death as their own failure more than Dirk or Marlene’s.

6. What were they like at school? Did they enjoy it? Did they finish? What level of higher education did they reach? What subjects did they enjoy? Which did they hate?

Both of them were not exactly anti-social during school, but had only small circles of friends that shifted and changed gradually as they aged. They had kind of a reputation for being “stuck up” because everyone knew they had money, but they didn’t know much else about them. Were actually pretty normal, if a little reserved from a lot of social neglect early in life. They dropped out after Charlie died and Dirk and Marlene left and never finished high school. Both were average students. Max was that kid who had a different book with them every day. Leo didn’t pay enough attention to be a good student, but he was always a good writer and pretty logical, so he got by.

7. Did they have lots of friends as a child? Did they keep any of their childhood friends into adulthood? 

They always had a few friends, but none were lasting. After Charlie’s death, they deliberately cut ties with everyone they knew and moved around for a few years before returning to Duluth. None of their school friends would likely recognize them now.

8. Did they have pets as a child? Do they have pets as an adult? Do they like animals? 

The Mercys have always had a cat or two. They’ve had Katherine for a couple of years now. It’s good for them to have something outside themselves to care about and look after.

9. Do animals like them? Do they get on well with animals? 

Both of the Mercys are pretty good with animals as they are usually pretty calm and affectionate with them.

10. Do they like children? Do children like them? Do they have or want any children? What would they be like as a parent? Or as a godparent/babysitter/ect?

They are both very good with children, though they have actively avoided them since Charlie’s death. Their thoughts on the possibility of parenthood are…. complicated. When they were younger, the idea was terrifying- because of what it would mean for them. Teen pregnancy freaks a lot of people out, but they were next level paranoid. Then, after Charlie, they couldn’t bear to think about it for a long time. Gradually though, they both started to consider the idea. Part of them wants to, in a way, recreate the “family” they had with Charlie, but the idea would mean considering a child to be her replacement. Which they fully realize is fucked up. So… they sort of want a kid, but don’t want to open that emotional can of worms without some delayed grieving they really don’t have the energy for.

11. Do they have any special diet requirements? Are they a vegetarian? Vegan? Have any allergies?

They have both cut out red meat since their teens.

12. What is their favourite food? 

Max loves wild rice soup and it’s the only thing she knows how to make from scratch. Leo loves going to late night diners for waffles.

13. What is their least favourite food?

The smell of ham makes Leo gag and Max hates potato salad

14. Do they have any specific memories of food/a restaurant/meal?

They remember everything they ate the day Charlie disappeared. Max had the last of the cheerios for breakfast, so Leo had to make oatmeal. They had school lunch of chicken and gravy. Then they got takeout for dinner on the way home- eggrolls and lo mein from Taste of Saigon in Canal Park. They got an odd number of eggrolls and rock paper scissor-ed for the last one. Max won, but they ended up splitting it.

15. Are they good at cooking? Do they enjoy it? What do others think of their cooking?

Nope. Thus plot and Autumn. They tried to cook between the hired chefs, but meals were absolutely heinous in those times because Anabelle used their bad cooking as just another excuse to criticize them. Mina tried as well but didn’t have any better results.

16. Do they collect anything? What do they do with it? Where do they keep it? 

Since they were became homeless as teens, Leo’s become sort of a packrat. He’s that guy that saves everything “just in case” he might need it or make it into something useful later. Max has to regularly go through all their stuff and throw out the real garbage he saves.

Max has an extensive collection of boots- since shoes are the one article of clothing they really can’t share. She also has like- twenty different silk and satin fancy slips and negligees but if you tell anyone you’re dead.

17. Do they like to take photos? What do they like to take photos of? Selfies? What do they do with their photos?

No on all counts. Aside from drivers licences (expired now), no pictures probably exist of them past age 14.

18. What’s their favourite genre of: books, music, tv shows, films, video games and anything else

Max is an epic adventure reader. LOTR, Dumas, you name it. Leo likes more modern lit. Realistic fantasy/scifi- David Mitchell and the like. Max loves classic films- cinema icons from 60s or earlier (their cat Katherine is for Katherine Hepburn). Leo is a total weirdo who is obsessed with live action/animation mashups. Who Framed Roger Rabbit is his alltime fave. They don’t watch a ton of tv, but when they do, it’s something weird like Pushing Daisies or something tame like National Geographic.

19. What’s their least favourite genres?

They really can’t handle any of Charlie’s favorite movies anymore.

20. Do they like musicals? Music in general? What do they do when they’re favourite song comes?

Not much for musicals. They listen to music in the yardhouse or while they’re working out in the stables or garage. Both very much into the classics as far as rock and some old country (cash and williams and the like) but Leo also likes indie alternative rock.

21. Do they have a temper? Are they patient? What are they like when they do lose their temper?

Max has a quicker temper- or rather, gets angry more easily. Any little comment from Anabelle sets her seething and in a bad mood for hours. It takes a lot more to set Leo off, but he goes from 0 to FIGHT ME in no time at all. ((See: Mr. Thackary mentioning his mom))

22. What are their favourite insults to use? What do they insult people for? Or do they prefer to bitch behind someone’s back?

Definitely “if i insult you to your face, it means we’re friends, but i can’t say it if I mean it because then it’s awkward” people. Will call each other and Autumn names all the time. Pretty generic and mild for the most part. “Dumbass” and “Bastard” and the like. Mina is a weird one because they know that’s not how she operates so they don’t want to upset her, but also she can tell they joke around with Autumn that way, so she feels a little left out. They try more gentle ribbing just to make her feel better.

23. Do they have a good memory? Short term or long term? Are they good with names? Or faces?

Max has a terrible memory and Leo has a good one. Drives Max crazy if they ever have an argument about something that happened more than a few days ago.

24. What is their sleeping pattern like? Do they snore? What do they like to sleep on? A soft or hard mattress?

Both of them are huge babies about having a soft mattress and lots of pillows. Even in their own bed, they both have trouble sleeping sometimes. Sadly enough, it’s the good dreams that keep them awake- dreams they have Charlie back and everything is fine again. 

Leo sleeps on his back and if he’s alone- STARFISH. But when Max is there more floppy easy cuddles. Max, on the other hand, is nothing but knees and elbows in her sleep and it is a Problem.

25. What do they find funny? Do they have a good sense of humour? Are they funny themselves?

Both the Mercys have a pretty dark sense of humor at times. Leo can be markedly darker, but also sillier in his humor, whereas max is more dry.

26. How do they act when they’re happy? Do they sing? Dance? Hum? Or do they hide their emotions? 

Both usually get more comfortable and friendly with others when they’re in a good mood. If it’s just the two of them, they’re just stupid affectionate and playful. Lots of snuggles and movies and snacks and giggling like kids.

27. What makes them sad? Do they cry regularly? Do they cry openly or hide it? What are they like they are sad?

They are sad most of the time. Max only cries when she wakes up from a dream about Charlie- Leo hasn’t cried since Charlie’s death. Max would probably fight anyone who saw her cry.

28. What is their biggest fear? What in general scares them? How do they act when they’re scared?

Losing one another is definitely their biggest fear now. Max tends to sort of freeze up when afraid, while Leo usually takes action in the moment, then freezes up when he pauses to think to hard about his fears.

29. What do they do when they find out someone else’s fear? Do they tease them? Or get very over protective? 

It depends on who that person is. But they have very strong protective tendencies, so they would have to REALLY hate someone to mock or use someone else’s fear.

30. Do they exercise? Regularly? Or only when forced? What do they act like pre-work out and post-work out?

They stay pretty active for work, but they would never “work out” for the sake of it. They’re both pretty strong, but don’t do much in the way of cardio.

31. Do they drink? What are they like drunk? What are they like hungover? How do they act when other people are drunk or hungover? Kind or teasing?

Ahhh yup. The drunk scene with Autumn is a regular occurrence if they can’t sleep or want to celebrate something. Max is more cheerful when drunk and definitely very snuggly. Huge affectionate drunk. Fun Fact: Leo getting overheated and taking off his jeans in that scene is 100% based on one of my roommates at university. When she drank, she would always complain about how hot it was and strip down to her underwear. Sometimes her head would get stuck in her shirt. So that’s drunk Leo. Max being an affectionate drunk and Leo taking his clothes off drunk means there is a lot of giggly clumsy drunk sex in the yardhouse and it is very stupidcute. They’re both pretty standard hung over- grumpy and slow. When Autumn or Mina drink without them, they go full on mom friend.

32. What do they dress like? What sorta shops do they buy clothes from? Do they wear the fashion that they like? What do they wear to sleep? Do they wear makeup? What’s their hair like?

The Mercys share the same wardrobe (aside from undies and shoes). They have picked up a collection of layers from thriftshops and such throughout the years. Max’s checkplaid coat is a prized possession. It’s the warmest thing they’ve got. When they left the house the first time, max bleached her hair a goldy-honey blond and kept dying it. But since Mina hired them, it’s been growing out ever since. She wears hats most of the time anyway, so the dark roots are barely visible, even tho it’s gotten past her earlobes. Leo has been thinking about cutting his hair again, but Max is trying to talk him out of it because she not so secretly likes it long. No makeup in years. Max misses it sometimes.

33. What underwear do they wear? Boxers or briefs? Lacey? Comfy granny panties?

From Autumn’s trips to the yardhouse we know this: Leo is a boxers and undershirts kinda guy, and Max is all about the lace and silk and satin. That makes it sound like this story is much sexier than it is.

34. What is their body type? How tall are they? Do they like their body?

Fairly fit from all the physical work, but in an average sort of way. They are about the same height-pretty average. They both have moments of vanity in between not really thinking about their own body much at all.

35. What’s their guilty pleasure? What is their totally unguilty pleasure? 

Max and her silky intimates. Leo sometimes watches the same movie over and over again just because he doesn’t want to get up to change it. THeir relationship with one another is…  complicated. They both feel guilty and decidedly unguilty about it.

36. What are they good at? What hobbies do they like? Can they sing?

They both have gotten pretty good at auto repair throughout the years. Max is stupid good at climbing. Trees, rocks, buildings. She sits out on the roof of the yardhouse when she’s annoyed with Leo and it is very frustrating. She’s also an amazing speed reader with high retention. If they ever need to look up how to do something, Max will read an article or book- paraphrasing outloud to instruct Leo as he tries it. Secret time: way back when he was very little, Marlene made Leo take dance and piano lessons. He hated it and found ways to skip out on the lessons pretty early on, but he still retained quite a bit. Now he just likes dicking around with weird little diy projects- fixing things and improving things around the yardhouse- making new candles out of the drippings and blunt ends of old ones.

37. Do they like to read? Are they a fast or slow reader? Do they like poetry? Fictional or non fiction?

Max reads constantly- and fast. She’ll read anything, but has a soft spot for epic adventures. Tolkein, Dumas, that kind of thing. Leo likes to read, but he’s slower and prefers quick, fun genre pieces.

38. What do they admire in others? What talents do they wish they had?

I think they admire people who have found their place and are comfortable in their lives. They realize what a rare thing that is and are struggling so much to find some sort of homeostasis, they really appreciate those who are self aware and self assured at the same time.

39. Do they like letters? Or prefer emails/messaging? 

Definitely phonecall or text people. If communication other than face-to-face is necessary at all.

40. Do they like energy drinks? Coffee? Sugary food? Or can they naturally stay awake and alert?

Coffee drinkers. But there’s a case of redbull in the yardhouse basement for emergency situations.

41. What’s their sexuality? What do they find attractive? Physically and mentally? What do they like/need in a relationship?

Max is definitely bisexual because she and Autumn will not stop with the ust no matter what I do. These bisexuals. I can’t take them anywhere. I assume Leo is straight, but he doesn’t interact with any men other than the accountant, so this could very well be a case of my characters keeping secrets from me.

Well, the two of them are in the rare situation of finding their soulmate at a very early age, so really, the venn diagram of “qualities I find attractive” and “qualities of my partner” for both of them is pretty much a circle.

I think they get a lot of what they need from one another, but they could stand to work on their relationship and their lives outside of one another. Even when it’s fairly stable, codependency is pretty damn unhealthy.

42. What are their goals? What would they sacrifice anything for? What is their secret ambition?

Goals are really just to keep one another safe and hopefully work back towards something resembling the people that Charlie loved so much.

43. Are they religious? What do they think of religion? What do they think of religious people? What do they think of non religious people?

I always thought Marlene came from a very traditional Catholic family. She only seemed to go to church when things were going well and she was feeling stable tho, so Leo has mostly good memories attached to religion. After Charlie disappeared, he leaned hard into Saint Philomena icons and such because it felt better to pray than do nothing.

Dirk, and Max’s mom, were never religious so she doesn’t have many feelings on the subject either way. She might have some bitter thoughts towards it from time to time, but won’t badmouth anything she knows is comforting to Leo.

44. What is their favourite season? Type of weather? Are they good in the cold or the heat? What weather do they complain in the most? 

Definitely winter people. *Stefano from SNL voice* Hot food. Stiff drinks. SNUGGLES.

45. How do other people see them? Is it similar to how they see themselves? 

That’s a hard one. Obviously people find them a bit off putting and weird most of the time. But Mina and Autumn at least also trust them and believe them to be capable, and in that, sort of develop fondness for their weirdness. I think for both of them, their sense of self is wrapped up in their sense of one another, so they aren’t very objective about themselves as individuals. That is a very wishywashy answer but here we are.

46. Do they make a good first impression? Does their first impression reflect them accurately? How do they introduce themselves?

They have never been very good with the first impressions, but they are pretty accurate to their typical behavior. Whether others warm up to them after getting used to it or not is up to that other person.

47. How do they act in a formal occasion? What do they think of black tie wear? Do they enjoy fancy parties and love to chit chat or loathe the whole event?

In my constantly running mental “Charlie lives!au,” the mercys are expected to attend all kinds of high end social gatherings. They hate them on principal more than actual dislike of being at them. But they find ways to make them fun for themselves. Embarrassing Dirk and Marlene in any way they can mostly. subtly needling people they don’t like. Etc.

Leo doesn’t like dressing up, and Marlene is always trying to tell Max how to dress so it’s a point of tension. Max will always do the exact opposite with her clothes that Marlene wants, so if she gets the “show some leg and pop some cleave- we need these people in a good mood” order, she shows up in high necks and full skirts; if it’s “keep it classy, we need to be a wholesome all american family here,” she’s nothing but slink, open backs and thigh slits.

Once Charlie gets older and starts to attend these gatherings as well, they are on constant alert, making sure she doesn’t interact too much with the wrong people.

48. Do they enjoy any parties? If so what kind? Do they organise the party or just turn up? How do they act? What if they didn’t want to go but were dragged along by a friend? 

Well, as the story stands they don’t attend any parties. The closest they get is drinking with Autumn in the one scene in the screenplay. They like that just fine. 

49. What is their most valued object? Are they sentimental? Is there something they have to take everywhere with them?

Leo still has a picture of Charlie and a Saint Philomena charm in his truck that he’d freak if he lost. Max has a beaded bracelet from her mother that only Leo has ever seen. She never wears it, but keeps it in a go bag just in case they have to make a quick run for it.

50. If they could only take one bag of stuff somewhere with them: what would they pack? What do they consider their essentials? 

They definitely have a go bag. Big wad of cash, basic survival materials in case they have to keep off the grid. fake ids. They’ve got it covered.

#essayofthoughts #winter gothic #mercys #max #leo #charlie #ft. dirk and marlene #omg i love my children so much #my sad damaged babs #LET ME WRITE MORE FOR YOU EVEN THO YOUR OFFICIAL STORY IS BASICALLY COMPLETE #long post

[unclejimmie-blog1]

Crazy Evil Thoughts

Ok, I may be drinking a bit of the conspiratorial colorless Kool-aid being slowly added to our drinking water to feel more paranoid, but I have a theory about Drumpf’s ties to Neo-Nazis and White Supremacist. It is a bit crazy, but fuck it, have you looked back at the last 10 months? I believe his connection to NNWS might be part of a devious master plan cooked up by the sinister minds inside his cabinet and the idiot and chief himself, Donald J Drumpf. Adjust your tinfoil hats and stay with me...

Why would Drumpf play to the Neo-Nazi, White Supremacist base? Well, “he’s a racist” might be your response, but I think he and his Alt-Right sadist friends might have a weird Machiavellian plot twist coming. What if Drumpf is using them to attack something most people would never want to give up. Free speech. 

Let me explain using the tragedy of 9/11. That event shook our country to its core, both sides felt the pain and were scared. In that vulnerable moment, the Bush administration asked the people to give up some of their basic rights to feel “safer.” The government passed laws and acts that gave the government more power and reduced the freedoms and liberties bestowed on us. In that moment we blinked, we gave up freedom for protection. 

Drumpf is a bully, has been his whole life. Bully’s with thin skin don’t like when you say bad things about them, especially the true ones. Thus in keeping with most dictators and authoritarian leaders who squash people who say nasty things, North Korea, Russia, China, Drumpf needs to control anyone who criticizes him.  But how do you change fundamental rights guaranteed by our Constitution and Bill of Rights? I hate to say it, but you  ‘9/11′ them. 

The 1st Amendment is primarily designed as a civil right to criticize the local, state and federal government. If you are going to attack a fundamental right you need to scare the shit out of people. The best way to do that with Free Speech is to embolden the worst of our society to march and shout their hate speech and wait for the Left to ask for you to take away their freedom so they can feel “safe.” 

Drumpf blew on the tiki torches of white supremacy with his own hate speeches about immigrants, people of color, and Muslims during the campaign. He sprinkled just enough clues into his comments that gave a “wink and nod” to these groups. He didn’t immediately denounce David Duke during his campaign. He did all of this for one thing so that a terrible event like Charlottesville would happen. He knew it would. It was inevitable. 

The GAO has data that shows White Supremist accounts for far more attacks on US Citizens that foreign terrorists. If you remove gang violence, these organized groups account for more violent acts than any other group. When a mosque gets attacked, Drumpf says nothing. When anti-Islamic violence takes place, nothing. The Alt Right, including Breitbart, Fox News, and Drumpf supporters call the Black LIves Matter movement "Terrorists”, “Hate Groups”. They chose those labels for one reason...

Over the years the Supreme Court has weighed in on a special class of expression, “Hate Speech.” Justice Sandra Day O’Connor described “true threats” as statements in which “the speaker means to communicate a serious expression of an intent to commit an act of unlawful violence to a particular individual or group of individuals.”  

If the Left screams to broaden the categorization of “hate speech” to more easily include NNWS and stop them from gathering and speaking, Drumpf will say, “Oh, don’t throw me in the briar patch.” You will be doing exactly what he and Beauregard Sessions want. They want to more easily label any group as a “hate group”. This is how you stop citizens from criticizing the Drumpf administration, you let them ask, no beg you to take away their freedom. Asking for any restrictions on free speech is EXACTLY what Drumpf wants. So my theory is that he specifically incited the worst of society to follow him so that they’d violently act and trigger a “9/11″ reaction from the Left to feel “safe.”

I know, I’m giving these guys way more credit than is probably do, but knowing Bannon and Miller’s perverse sense of white entitlement, I really don’t think it is that crazy. My recommendation is to not fall into the trap of giving away our freedoms and liberties. I know it is hard. I know they suck. I know that this world is totally fucked right now. But believe in the power of our inalienable rights and stand tall that we have these rights to protect us all from tyranny. Okay, another big glass of gay frog water and back to the front lines.

[bookishreviewsblog]

Roshan Chokshi: The Gilded Wolves (The Gilded Wolves #1) | Lara

AN INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER From New York Times bestselling author Roshani Chokshi comes The Gilded Wolves, a novel set in Paris during a time of extraordinary change—one that is full of mystery, decadence, and dangerous desires... No one believes in them. But soon no one will forget them. It's 1889. The city is on the cusp of industry and power, and the Exposition Universelle has breathed new life into the streets and dredged up ancient secrets. Here, no one keeps tabs on dark truths better than treasure-hunter and wealthy hotelier Séverin Montagnet-Alarie. When the elite, ever-powerful Order of Babel coerces him to help them on a mission, Séverin is offered a treasure that he never imagined: his true inheritance. To hunt down the ancient artifact the Order seeks, Séverin calls upon a band of unlikely experts: An engineer with a debt to pay. A historian banished from his home. A dancer with a sinister past. And a brother in arms if not blood. Together, they will join Séverin as he explores the dark, glittering heart of Paris. What they find might change the course of history—but only if they can stay alive.

“Wolves were everywhere. In politics, on thrones, in beds. They cut their teeth on history and grew fat on war.” 

Aaaaaalright, so before picking up this book I had no idea that was exactly something I needed in my life and now I’m left with a question of how I’m going to survive wait of yet ANOTHER sequel that is nowhere near finished. I decided to give this book a shot since I saw a lot of amazing reviews and recommendations, and it is SO WORTH IT. Reading it made me so genuinely happy and I was basically gliding through the chapters by the time I finished. The pure adoration for The Gilded Wolves hit me as the book was coming to an end. The book was really good, but it takes its time to get there. For the first 30% or so I felt mostly indifferent towards plot and most of the characters – there just wasn’t anything special going on and characters were only starting to develop. The plot takes time to unfold and action to kick in, but when it does, it becomes a wild flipping pages and reading faster than I thought I ever could. It takes place in the 19th century in Paris, during the Exposition Universelle. Among the grand balls, operas and shows combined with an extensive and detailed history of Paris, there is a world hidden from the public – magic, powers of Forging and a secret organization called The Order. The Order is in charge of protecting The Babel’s Fragment from the public’s attention, or rather, protecting the public from its immense and destructive power. Séverin is the rightful heir to the House Vanth – one of the four Houses leading the order, but his claim to the lineage has been denied ten years ago and he’s been trying a way to annul the results of the faked test ever since. The other three Houses are called Kore, Nyx and The Fallen House – the one that was destroyed after trying to unite all Rings and Fragment in order to bring down entire civilization of the time. After stealing his valuable Chinese compass, Séverin gets an offer, or more a threat from House Nyx’s heir Hypnos. He is to take his team and acquire the Eye of Horus, an object that is rumored to have the power of locating the Fragment itself. Only that way will he be able to keep his friends safe and, maybe, getting back what is rightfully his. As soon as I’ve gotten into the spirit of it, I was instantly pulled into a swirl of action, plot twists and amazing world building Chokshi so carefully laid out for us. There was just so many surprises and those plot twists and carefully planned course of events got me in a state of eternal euphoria. This book is intertwined with elements from several different mythologies and histories of several different religions, conceptualized kind of like DaVinci’s Code. I felt a bit overwhelmed from time to time by that mix of facts from a lot of different sources, but all in all, it was an amazing combination of schemes, puzzles, mathematics, history and “acquisitions”. I’m in love, I think I might take up a job of digging out hieroglyphs. The most beautiful, amazing part of this were characters – I had to instantly add more room in my heart for new fictional crushes. All of them were so thoroughly developed, their interactions and backstories connected creating tension and conflict, but also so much love and understanding. I can’t ever get enough of squad-family goals. I’m melting inside. Laila- THE absolute queen of everything. Laila is an Indian girl who came to Paris with a group of dancers, in pursuit of an ancient book that has answers about her past. Also known as L’Engime, one of the Paris’s most popular dancers, she is desired by literally half of the city’s population but that fucking doesn’t matter because she has eyes only for our homeboy Séverin. She is so a strong badass and powerful, not to mention hot as hell – I mean she is literally *spoiler* sewn together in a foreign body and has a kickass mysterious power. Séverin – He is the ultimate dad of L’Eden squad. I just loved reading about his past, obsession with recovering his family line and so-called “acquisitions” (let’s be honest he’s just thieving around hahaha). *spoiler for ending* I so needed that ending – I’m sorry for Tristan, but his death shaped Severin’s character and further development, and TENSION between him and Laila and I’m doneee Zofia – none of the other characters made such a huge impression on me as Laila and Séverin, but crazy scientist with past chasing her isn’t far behind Hypnos – little “you can’t sit with us” cinnamon roll, is lucky Séverin adopted him Tristan and Enrique kind of annoyed me half of the book, the other half I just didn’t acknowledge them, idk I just didn’t see anything in them… “When you are who they expect you to be, they never look too closely. If you're furious, let it be fuel.” After THAT ending (which contained like 4 cliffhangers and brought me to tears!) I don’t know how do I move on ;(

#books #book review #youngadult #mythology #roshani chokshi #the gilded wolves #fantasy #historical fiction

[gracielemons4-blog]

Stalk Tissues

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[pinksweatergettingbetter]

MAYA I TRUSTED YOU

WHAT WOULD WILL POWERS SAY

ok he'd probably be like ‘hehe; guess I'm falling further into obscurity thats cool i was never amazing in the first place’

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“theres only one!”

...that is rare

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“i traded my watch to my kooraheenese friend! it plays the steel samurai theme when it goes off!”

I SMELL A CHEKOVS GUN

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“it sounds just like the steel samurai theme”

“no it doesn't!”

mayas right, it doesn't sound like the steel samurai's theme. 

it sounds BAD.

seriously i feel like my soul is physically rejecting it 

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put your arms akimbo at me again young lady and ill push you into your magic soul pool.

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“that whole séance thing makes trials completely different”

meh

speaking of trials, we’re back to trials! ya–– i dont want to deal with nahyuta

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“you have to pitch your terrible crossover!! i won't let you down”

as much as i disapprove of the crossover let it be known that phoenix is a sweetie pie.

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“The sacred murder dagger was used to murder someone?!?!??! BLASPHEMY!!!”

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“The lowest level of hell; the Hell of Tickling” IM KINKSHAMING KOOORAHEENISM

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“They shall not escape on their /redtext/ Freedom Express today!”

she did it yaaaaayy!

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U R DIARHOEA!!! KOORAHEEN!!!

well i

i cant argue....

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oh god no t voice acting again

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LOL YOU CAN SKIP IT AHAHHAHHA

AND THE DANCE TOO HJDSJSFAKJ

guess its not *that* important eh

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the entire court just called phoenix a shithead. 

i mean people say “Polkhunka” when theyre surprised, and the term is “polkhunan”. so yeah. either hellion, or shithead. nice.

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phoenix: this makes no sense 

me: ooh i cant wait for the bullshit excuse!! 

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Well ill be damned to tickle-hell. Rayfa’s a television aerial. 

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oh i see how they did that. i guess spirit visions have steady-cam?

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.........he ran right into it

dude why 

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i just love this. “yes he ran directly at the killer, to fight them! with his arms flailing in terror!! it might look stupid and fake but actually it’s kooraheen’s biggest martial art, RonDeliteFu!”

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every time Rayfa does her hand-flinging-out pose i mistake her sash for a stick and i keep thinking she’s a muppet 

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“we can’t let the special fires go out, so we make sure to remove the glass around them every year on top of a window mountain so that a woman can um...... walk around it i guess.”

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i hate to admit it but these stupid pond vision things are really stumping my blind ass

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i stg pohlkunka is the stupidest sounding made-up expletive ive ever heard

id rather heard cowabunga every time something shocking happens for godssakes

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“wow he really does care about ema”

hey show dont tell lol

“i cant believe he's come to understand their value”

uhhh well

they stated that they still hold investigations despite their magic pool parties, so uhhhhhhh yeah???? forensic investigators are usually pretty helpful??

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since Sadmad’s catchphrase appears to be ‘putrid’, i keep reading ‘purification rite’ as ‘putrification rite’

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i cant believe they did a “what if... (EXTREME CLOSE UP ZOOM) PLOT TWIST?!”

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STOP SAYING PUTRID

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oh hey its dirty hobo man! ...also i guess the ‘sexy pan up shot’ is for every new character :/

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hobo rangers go...

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...Nahyuta named him A’nohn Ihmus. A’nohn Ihmus.

Well that just cements my idea that Kooraheenians are just a bunch of Americans that stole a landmass and made up a phony baloney culture. 

It has been confirmed that they are legitimately just taking english words and ‘kooraheenifying’ them.

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“i used my binoculars to spy on the rite at the inner sanctum”

A’nohn is just as perverted as his namesake from Tuhmbl’r

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“Feh. I knew you were a fool...” 

Cue Franziska crashing her plane into the court room to yank on Sadmad’s braid to scold him for taking her word.

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“shall be reborn as a witless sea urchin with barbs limited to your posterior”

ok well sadmad, sea urchins asses are next to their mouths... on the bottom of them. completely opposite to the, uh, you know. Spiky part.

So I’m not sure if that serves to strengthen your point or just make you look like a moron

i mean i guess it served to enhance sadmad’s point since phoenix’d be totally smooth and unprotected, but then he wouldn’t even reach adulthood so that sea otter wouldn’t come in too early and...

...he just said phoenix will be reborn as not only mentally slow but also physically deformed.

...uh... nice one, sadmad.

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AND MAYA PULLED A REACHAROUND ON THE PRIEST 

YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST FROM THE HOLY MONK, GUYS

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to be fair, she could have stabbed him with a reverse-grip or not; one doesn’t have to hold their hand at any particular to perform a reach around 

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oh well at least the contradiction is incredibly obvious 

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at least hobo ranger has an excuse to use words like “bucko”

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i hate that,,,, theres a rule against climbing the mountains during the rite. that means that there have been perverts of yore who tried to spy on the lady changing 

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hes gonna see her shad–– (sigh)

yknow, i dont think shadows are detailed enough to know which way someone is holding a knife.

also moonlight isn't that bright 

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DWAAYYYYMMMN

sasquatch’d!!

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ok so... does happiraki mean “hello” or “hooray!” because its been used it both contexts 

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i just realized that the Plumed Punisher theme song sounds like one of those posts where someone takes a recognizable song and fucks with it in a silly way, like pitch shifting it at awkward moments or changing the key

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i cannot believe i have to use a fucking walkthrough for this game. I'm disgusted with myself. I'm better than this.

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“no one was allowed in there and the only way up were the stairs!”

ah yes, the unguarded stairs surrounded by people who had their heads down. in prayer.

totally impenetrable. 

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“What?! This is insane!!” no no, phoenix, youre doing it wrong. you have to say “this”, then sadmad has to say “is” and then the judge has to yell “insaaaaane!!” because its funny when one person says one word of a sentence each!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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‘rah rah sis boom bah, fight, fight, phoenix wright!!”

um excuse me maya who gave you the right to be cute

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why does sadmad only have one hand-guard-glove thingy

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“my bag of bluffs” is an interesting and long way to say “ass”

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they put... a maximum security prison... on top of their holy mountain. they put their criminals... on top of their. holy mountain.

they put a jail. in a church. in fact they put it higher up... closer to... god. 

what the fuck. the fourth one. only accessible by helicopter.

who was smoking what when they decided this???

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(sigh) mmmmm id been waiting to use that patchwork quilt

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“hell of hangnails”

not as fetishy but still pretty–– actually you know what that sounds kinda fucked up. isn't that just kinda G rated torture anyway 

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wow that incredibly obvious lie deserves the terrible pursuit theme??

maybe its the last one (i hope)

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“are you the rebel hunter!!??!?!?!??”

um well no, unless the rebel hunter is a criminal. jackass.

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...cutting dirty deals with criminals, are we, sadmad?

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“haha, the fact that the third person at the scene was a wanted criminal destroys your theory that it was the rebel hunter Keera that killed the high priest!!”

...wow... gosh i was wrong... and the fact that a wanted criminal was actually at the scene... doesn’t help me at all... because once i said that one person didi it, it couldn’t possibly be someone else... oh no... i guess it was Maya who did it... for reals... not the.... wanted criminal....

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...hang on, his little power rangers dance was the defiant dragons dance? how... did nobody notice this?? sadmad really was colluding with criminals wasn’t he. gosh. what a trustworthy guy.

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phoenix: oh no!! his testimony was a lie!!

oh no! the testimony that did nothing but damage your case was a lie!!! 

??????

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sadmad: get him!

hobo ranger: (does a little hop and daintily scurries off)

sadmad: ... (takes a good five leisurely seconds to stop the background music) put everyone on high alert. i want everyone after that guy

that guy who just. skipped out of a courtroom. past hundreds of crazy people and several bailiffs. 

haha... the kooraheenes police. to quote phelous... THEY’RE THE BEST!

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“what was the point of all that, anyway?”

search me, phoenix.

“well, i cant help but feel that entire episode was an enormous waste of time”

hey capcom? hanging a lampshade on it doesn’t make it better. it just amplifies how much it sucks.

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“yes! i recognized that piece of paper because it looks exactly like the piece i have! thats covered in blood and unrecognizable!!!”

...nice

OH AND ITS THE PERFECT FIT TO COVER THE BLOODSTAIN WELL ISNT THAT JUST FUCKIN SERENDIPITOUS 

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“the ignorant lawyer has not bothered to learn out language??”

well A) he's not an international attorney, B) he was on vacation, not studying abroad, and C) fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you. you’re all speaking english all the time anyway, you bunch of fuckin phoneys 

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i stg sadmad if you say putrid one more time i’ll cram a rotten egg down your pasty white gullet and show you the meaning of the word 

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“the criminal could have only escaped if the high priest helped him out, so why would he kill him?”

hey sadmad? remember that thing about using your putrid brain? yeah, doesn’t take too big a leap to realize that you might’ve just proved phoenix’s ‘idiot theory’ right. maybe the priest um... was a rebel??? who was going to do just that??? and the rebel killer offed his sorry ass?

perhaps, o foolish prosecutor, you should think before you open your rancid lips... lo, in your ignorance, you will be cast down to the hell of those who are kind of stupid....... the hell of perpetual fart smell. there you shall inhale the decomposing winds of ten thousand and one accursed mihtama, while fart fetishists gaze on in envy... 

oh wow i didnt even need to go on that spiel, he just admitted it straight up. but yeah, apparently when Lady Kee’ra impersonator kills a rebel, it’s A-OK. But when Maya kills a rebel, well, fuck, she’s a foreign bitch, execute her!!

also the way he said it seems to imply that he knew all along so uh

maybe people should start suspecting this guy. he seems to... know a lot of rebel criminals.

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every time sadmad shakes his head i wanna break his neck

man i remember being annoyed at edgeworth in the first game and wanting to hop my desk and rough him up, but never wanting to physically maim or kill him. you suck, sadmad. 

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WE GOT IT, FOLKS!! WE GOT THE ASSAULT!! IT’S UM, IT’S SUPERNATURAL FORCE ASSAULT THIS TIME. 

FUCK BIRDS AND SWORDS, I GUESS? ACTUAL MAGIC IS THE WAY TO GO?

hey sadmad; tickling? bondage? can we... keep that out of the courtroom please?

also “oh no! i can’t point my finger!!” phoenix cries, forgetting that he has two arms. i guess capcom won’t spring for more than one sprite tho haha

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“the keera we saw was the statue draped in the sacred robes!”

with a... knife sticking out, apparently. ok..?

also gosh, maya’s really fast, tiptoeing around the abbot, draping the costume just so, then tiptoeing back around? like lightning she is!!

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he just cut off his own theme song.

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“she used her fiendish tricks to fool the court room”

which didn’t work at all if you remember the beginning of this court so fuck you?

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“she sought to use the divination seance to mislead us!”

good going, pointing out an absolutely massive flaw in your country’s legal system, sadmad.

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i cant believe we had a flashback for absolutely no other reason than Sadmad to gloat. I FILE FOR A MISTRIAL ON GROUNDS OF MISUSE OF FLASHBACKS.

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please oh god just let it end i dont have enough space in my stomach for any more ulcers

i can’t stand hearing him say let it go one more time please I'm begging you

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oh no... phoenix has failed... he’s going to die... it’s really going to happen...

just get to the surprise witness or whatever already

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oh thank god. love you, headband guy

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“the dagger bears the finger prints of maya fey!”

wow. the police suck major ass at catching running people, but their finger print checking speed is second-to-none. ...either that or they waited a while before telling people about a dead body.......

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oh gosh!!! its totally maya!!! she arrived 2 years ago and so did lady keera and 

yeah no. it’s not her. 

but even if it was, kinda awkward there, sadmad? she’s um. kind of a hero to you.

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i dont get it why is everyone freaking out. i thought the keera impersonator was considered some kind of vigilante hero? why is it suddenly bad when they “find out” it’s maya? is it because she isn't kooraheenees?

I'm honestly really confused. everyone was rooting for the masked defender one moment, but now that its maya, it’s murder?? 

seriously what the fuck. like the gallery was legit going “ah!! lady keera has come back to save us from the rebels!”

and then its like “its not divine its some foreign bitch in a cloak” and now its like SERIAL KILLER. also, nice. we’ve never been allowed another day in court because there was a second charge racked up. awesome. (with the possible exception of Ron Delite, tho he was changing his charge)

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sadmad can go choke on his own braid and the gallery can lick their own hypocritical asses. i can’t believe i stayed up till 2 am to finish this section.

#sulking over SOJ #soj spoilers obvs] #it just keeps getting better........ and better..........