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wheresarizona · 1 year

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Gif by the amazing @pedropascalsx

September Part 2

Firefly Hospital, 2024

summary: Twenty years ago, Joel Miller was the love of your life. On the day of the Outbreak, you’d gotten separated and never saw him again—imagine your surprise when you find out the smuggler Marlene hired to bring the immune girl to your research hospital is none other than the man you thought you’d lost forever.

pairing: Joel Miller/f!reader (reader is a doctor with no physical descriptions)

rating: E (18+! No y/n, alternating POV, age gap (10 years), oral sex (f receiving), face-sitting, vaginal fingering, coming untouched, dirty talk, praise kink, canon-typical violence, minor character death, slight angst, emotions, love confessions, mentions of PTSD, handwavey medical jargon (went to google medical school for this one), Ellie being a cockblock, Ellie giving Joel so much shit, TLOU finale speculation, TLOU tv spoilers, TLOU game spoilers)

word count: 16.6k+

a/n: This goes over reader and Joel’s reunion after twenty years of being apart. It is dramatic and a fun ride. I’m playing fast and loose with game canon to speculate how the show finale will go, and this chapter follows a bit of how it goes in the game, with me taking some liberties. Thank you to the love of my life, @juletheghoul for betaing and being by my side.

Thank you for reading! Comments and reblogs are appreciated!

Part 1 - Part 3 - Series Masterlist - Masterlist

20 Years After the Outbreak

He can’t fucking believe it.

He’s at a loss.

Months Joel spent with this little girl, bringing her across the country, keeping her safe, protecting her with his life—fucking Tess lost hers getting Ellie to the Fireflies, and they’re just going to kill her in order to reverse-engineer a vaccine? She was a lamb to the slaughter. He’d inadvertently brought her to her death.

Anger is threading in his belly, pissed off over everything he went through, feeling like it was all for nothing, not if she’s going to die.

They’re in a hospital that’s being used by the Fireflies to try and find a cure, Ellie taken from him, Joel kneeling on a hospital room floor after an armed guard had hit him, listening to Marlene talk about how this was harder for her due to her history with the girl.

Joel rolls his eyes because if she actually gave a shit about Ellie, she wouldn’t let this happen.

There has to be another way.

He has to find Ellie.

He almost lost her getting here, and he isn’t going to just step back and let her die, the world be damned, he can’t lose another person he cares about, not if he can help it. He’ll do everything in his power to find her and get her the fuck out of here—she’s too important to him.

Marlene’s in front of him, the guard at her side.

“This isn’t about me, her, or you,” she tells him. “There is no other choice here—my hands are tied.”

He scoffs, moving to sit on his ass and resting his arms on his knees, glaring at her. “Yeah,” he sneers, “you keep tellin’ yourself that bullshit if it helps you sleep at night.”

She sighs, shaking her head.

“March him out of here,” she orders the guard. “He tries anything. Shoot him. Don’t ruin this, Joel.” She turns on her heel, opens the room door, and leaves, Joel’s mind racing with what he can do. He’s sized up the other man, knowing he can take him, the only disadvantage being that Joel didn’t have any weapons, and he did.

“Get up,” the Firefly says.

Joel doesn’t bother moving, working out in his brain his next steps. He needs to get his hands on a gun, thankful they hadn’t handcuffed him, which would give him the opportunity to disarm the guard.

Get a weapon, find Ellie

His mind chants.

It was evident that she wasn't safe as long as these people were alive, so he’d take out anyone who got in his way.

“I said get up.” The other man raises his handgun, pointing it at Joel.

He sighs, groaning as he rises, rage pulsing in his veins, his jaw clenching, hands in tight fists wanting to hit this bastard.

Marlene left the door open, the Firefly’s back to it, his attention focused on Joel, not realizing someone had slipped inside quietly behind him. Joel watches as the smaller person claps a hand over the man’s mouth, their other hand slicing open his throat with what he thought might be a scalpel. The guard gurgles as he falls forward, the gun clattering to the ground, grabbing at his neck to try and stop the bleeding, to no avail, falling to the floor in a growing pool of blood.

Joel’s confused, his eyes a little wider, taking in his unexpected savior.

From the scrubs she’s wearing and the scalpel, he thinks she’s some kind of doctor. Her hair is hidden under a surgical cap, her face obscured with a mask covering half of it as if she’d left in the middle of an operation.

She’s bending down and picking up the gun, tossing it to him when she straightens, Joel catching it easily.

“Who are you?” he asks.

There’s something familiar about her eyes, but he can’t place who she is, not sure who the fuck he knew who’d be all the way out here and willing to risk their life for him, his brain coming up with no one.

For one hopeful second, even though he knows it’s fucking impossible, he thinks it’s Tess until the woman speaks, her muffled voice dashing his hopes, “No time to chat,” she says. “We have to get Ellie—I couldn’t do it alone.”

His eyebrows are in his hairline, all of the confusion and disappointment being replaced with hope once more.

“You know where she is?” he asks.

“Yes,” she answers, nodding. “Follow me. Your stuff is down this hall.” She points behind her. She’d discarded the scalpel, pulling a handgun from the back of her pants. “Come on. We don’t have much time.”

Leaving without another word, Joel is hot on her heels. Questions could wait until Ellie was safe, keeping his guard up and on alert, fingers itching to kill these assholes. Down the hallway, she shows him where his things are on a counter, him quickly putting on his backpack, their weapons drawn as they start moving, him covering her back.

“We’re turning up here,” she whispers. “Two guards—need to get to the stairwell.”

“Copy that.”

Eerie calmness washes over him, his brain working to figure out their next moves. She stops at the corner, glancing around it. Her head turns toward him, nodding, then she steps out, two shots ringing out. Joel sees the Fireflies crumpling to the ground as he follows.

“Clear,” she says, stuffing her gun into her pants as she goes to one of the bodies to take their semi-automatic rifle. Joel does the same, impressed with the clean headshots.

“Who are you?” he asks again, taking up point behind her again with the bigger gun.

“We’ll worry about that later, Joel,” she answers, already on the move.

“How’d you know my name?”

“Ellie,” she replies. “But I’d never forget Joel Miller.”

Does she know him? Does he know her? His eyes had trailed over her body for any kind of clue, but he came up empty.

“What’s your name?”

“That’s not important,” she says. They’re approaching the stairwell. “Ellie’s on the top floor, far end. The place will be littered with guards. They won’t hesitate to kill you, so show no mercy.”

“Wasn’t plannin’ on it,” he grits out. “Would burn this fuckin’ place to the ground if I could.”

“I’ll bring the gasoline. You light the match. Deal?”

Joel huffs out an amused breath. He may not have any idea who this woman is who’s helping him, but she’s competent, knows what needs to be done, and is funny.

He kinda likes her, whoever she is.

They don’t speak as they hurry up the stairs, and once they’ve exited, she jams a chair into the door to lock it.

She was right about the place being littered with Fireflies.

They move as a unit, in sync, somehow knowing what the other would do without speaking, taking out anyone who got in their way swiftly and efficiently. Rage fueled him, and she led him, knowing where to take cover, tossing each other more ammunition divested from those they’d gunned down. The guards had no idea what hit them, hearing screams and frantically calling for reinforcements over their radios, wondering out loud who was killing them.

It’s a bloodbath, a fucking massacre. Joel and this woman are ruthless in their endeavor to get to Ellie.

Blood is spattered on their clothes and skin, sweat clinging to their bodies, breathing hard when they enter a door and see where the operating room is. Joel barricades the door they’d come through with medical equipment to buy them time, his knees aching and back sore, heart racing a mile a minute.

“There will be a nurse and a doctor,” she whispers. “I should’ve been in there, too.”

He grunts in response, taking off his backpack to strap the rifle to it, putting it back on, and grabbing the handgun from his waist.

He’s hoping and praying they’ll make it in time, not sure what he’ll do if they don’t, the trek to the room feeling like it takes forever.

She pushes through the door first, him stepping in after her training his gun on the surgeon about to operate.

“Get away from her!” Joel angrily demands, his teeth bared, ready to shoot.

“What are you doing here?” the surgeon asks, moving to stand between them and Ellie, holding up a scalpel in defense. “You brought him here?” The question was directed at the mystery woman.

“Yes,” she answers, her gun locked on him. “We’re not letting you kill her.”

“She’s our future! You can’t take her! This is the only way to save lives!”

“It’s not!” she shouts, Joel hearing her anger.

“You’ll pay for this—don’t come any closer,” the surgeon threatens, swinging the scalpel around.

There’s no hesitation when she pulls the trigger, the man falling to the ground as the nurse screams, Joel seeing her reaching on a surgical tray for something sharp, his shot stopping her.

The room is cleared, his focus moving to Ellie.

“Sweet Jesus,” he murmurs, his gun going back into his waistband, not wasting another second to get to the girl, her in a surgical gown and oxygen mask, hooked up to an IV, her eyes closed.

“Come on, baby girl,” he says, carefully removing the mask. The woman had shouldered her rifle, moving to the other side of the table to carefully take care of the IV and bandage Ellie’s hand. “I gotcha,” his voice soft as he gently picks her up, his attention moving to the woman. “How do we get outta here?”

He watches as she tears off the cap and, finally, the face mask.

Stumbling back, he feels like he’s been shot, his eyes going wide, all of the oxygen leaving his lungs and making it hard to breathe, blood pounding in his ears.

It can’t be.

Since the night of the outbreak, Joel has been plagued with nightmares, reliving the horrors over and over again, self-medicating with pills and home-brewed booze to dreamlessly sleep. There were nights when he’d dream of the woman he once loved—her eyes, her smile, usually the two of them in bed with soft light pouring in from the window, and if his brain was being particularly cruel, he’d be on top of her, watching as she came around him—something he once loved to see, and was now painful, waking up harder than a rock, and too fucking sad to do anything about it except drink until he passed out. A vicious cycle.

Staring at the woman in front of him, it’s the same face from his dreams.

He’d kissed those lips, held those cheeks, spent hours studying every detail, and thought he’d never see it again—only in memory, another person lost to him.

It feels like he’s seeing a ghost, unable to believe that this is real, that she’s standing there, thinking maybe he might be dead, and he’s having a nice hallucination before his soul leaves this earth.

He croaks out your name, it feeling rusty on his tongue.

She smiles softly, and he sucks in a breath because it is you, and you’re alive, tears beginning to burn in his eyes.

“Hi, babe,” you greet with a wiggle of your fingers in a wave.

His heart constricts, his lips slowly tipping up, replying without a second thought.

“Hi, baby.”

Hours Earlier

“She doesn’t have to die!” you shout.

For months, Marlene has been talking about a girl immune to the infection and that she hired a smuggler to deliver her to your research hospital where you worked, but after most of Marlene’s crew didn’t make the trip here, you all assumed the girl hadn’t survived.

At least you had until she’d been found unconscious nearby, the old bite mark that’d healed and scarred with no sign of infection prominent on her arm, identifying her as Ellie Williams.

Tests were done to confirm her immunity, and now you’re discussing what’s to be done with the lead surgeon at this facility and Marlene, the doctor so adamant about finding a cure he isn’t taking into account that Ellie is a child and that there are other options than doing a procedure that will outright kill her.

“We have to extract the fungus,” he replies.

“Yes, and we can biopsy,” you argue.

“Can that be done?” Marlene asks.

He’s sitting behind his desk, you and Marlene standing in front of it. She’s called you in as a second opinion because you’re second in line behind the surgeon here at the hospital.

You and he speak at the same time.

“Yes.”

“No.”

Her attention moves to him.

“Lay it out for me why a biopsy wouldn’t work.” Her arms are crossed over her chest, looking tired.

“The fungus is intertwined with the brain, and removing it would destroy the host.”

“She’s a child, not some science experiment. Why does it all have to be removed?”

He sighs.

“It’s our best chance at making the vaccine—extract the entire specimen, and we’ll save millions of lives.”

“At the cost of an innocent kid?” Marlene asks with a raised eyebrow.

He leans forward on the desk, his eyebrows furrowing.

“Do you think I’m unaware of the situation?” he asks. “How many Fireflies have died for less? How many sacrifices have been made for nothing when this one will actually have results?”

She looks at you.

“Rebuttal?”

“In order to make a vaccine, we only need some of the mutated infection. It’s possible to biopsy some of it to get what we need—extracting the entire specimen is overkill and murder.”

Marlene faces him again.

“I want to agree with her,” she says, pointing her thumb at you. “If she can do it without killing Ellie, then I’ll have her take over.”

His eyes narrow.

“She’s not even a real doctor.” “My degree would say otherwise,” you snidely reply.

He met your gaze.

“You didn’t complete your residency—you were an intern when the outbreak happened. I was a practicing physician with years under my belt, and you think you know our best course of action for this situation? I have the experience. I have been searching for a cure for years while you were off being a medic.” The disdain is evident in his tone. “You may have risen in the ranks here over the last five years, but I am the head of this hospital.” He looks at Marlene. “I’ve been working for your cause practically since its inception. Our goal is to make a vaccine. You’ve trusted me here for years to do our work, and we’ve been fighting for this moment—this is our chance to justify all of the sacrifices and horrific things we’ve been through, and we can’t let it all go to waste because our cure happens to reside in a fourteen-year-old girl—you have to trust me on this, a biopsy is not enough, we need it all to ensure the vaccine is made.”

“That’s horse shit!” you exclaimed, throwing up your hands.

Marlene holds her hand up to you, her attention on the surgeon.

“What if this was your daughter?” she asks, well aware that he has one, who’s also a Firefly.

“I wouldn’t hesitate,” he answers. “One life for millions of others? I think it’s worth the sacrifice.”

She nods.

“Do it.”

“Marlene, I can—” you start to protest.

She turns to you, cutting you off, “We have to do whatever it takes to be successful—if you don’t agree, you can leave. It’s being done with or without you, but you're not welcome back once you step outside those doors.”

Your mouth falls open, anger swirling in your gut.

This is murder. They’re going to kill this girl, and what if it doesn’t pan out to anything? This isn’t sitting right with you, not when there are other options. You’ve been with the Fireflies for years, a way to survive and try to do some good, but seeing what they’re willing to do for a cure has made you disillusioned with the group—the experimentations, infecting people to try out vaccines that failed—and now there’s a real shot at getting somewhere, and they want to kill the person who’s giving it to them.

Can you get her out?

Can you save her?

That smuggler she came with managed to get her across the country in relatively good shape, and you have to assume he fought and killed to keep her safe.

Would he help you?

Two against dozens of armed guards sounds like a suicide mission, but what will the Fireflies resort to if this all fails?

As the surgeon said, you spent years as a medic, which meant you were traveling, protecting yourself, gaining your skills as a doctor and in self-defense, not shy about guns, blood, or carnage.

If they’re going to do whatever it takes, then you will too, in order to save this girl.

“Am I understood?” Marlene asks.

“Yes, ma’am,” you reply.

“Good.” She glances back at the man. “I’m gonna go tell Joel.”

The name has a jolt running through you, memories of a man from your past coming to the forefront of your brain—chocolate-colored eyes, brown waves of hair, a strong nose, broad shoulders—Joel Miller was a hard one to lose, and you never recovered, would never recover. He was the love of your life, and you were planning on spending the rest of your days with him and his daughter up until the world ended, and you got separated, hoping they were out there somewhere as safe as they could be in these times. You squash down the sliver of hope, knowing Marlene isn’t talking about your Joel.

“Why?” he asks, making you mad that he’s questioning her decency.

“He traveled with her for months. He has the right to know. Good luck with your surgery.” With that, she left, leaving the two of you.

“I know you don’t agree with me,” he starts, “but today will go down in history as the day we saved the world.”

Your hands clench at your sides, grinding your teeth.

“Right…”

“Get her prepped for the operation. We’ll start in two hours.”

“How many will you need on your service?”

He thinks it over for a second.

“You can scrub in—I won’t need your help. One nurse will do. It’s a pretty straightforward procedure.”

“As you wish, Doctor,” you say through your teeth. “I’ll get the operating room put together.”

With the discussion over, you leave the room, trying to figure out what you’ll do as you walk to the surgical floor, mindlessly changing into scrubs, and a surgical cap, putting on your medical mask last. In the back of your locker, you take the handgun, stuffing it into the waistband of your pants, thankful it was normal to walk around armed.

Before you go to the girl’s room, you stop at the nurse's station, having the few there decide who will help during the surgery.

You’re not going to bother putting the operating room together; that will give you extra time.

Frankly, you shouldn’t even bother seeing the girl, but something inside you wants to meet her, so you go, her sitting up in a hospital bed, legs criss crossed under her, reading some old magazine one of the nurse’s probably brought her.

Knocking on her door, you ask, “Anything good in there?”

She looks over the pages at you.

“Just two hundred and fifty-four hot new fashion, beauty, and body secrets. People really read this shit?”

Laughing, you answer, “Yes, especially girls your age.”

She makes a face that has you snorting, her setting it down.

“It’s crazy how much people cared about how they looked.”

Walking towards her, you smile, nodding your head.

“I know,” you reply. “It would take me a minimum of thirty minutes to get ready before leaving the house.”

Shock is on her face.

“Why did it take so fucking long?”

“Shower, hair, makeup, finding the perfect outfit—if I had a date, it took me an hour because I wanted to look as cute as possible.”

Sadness has your chest going tight, remembering your first date with Joel and how you stressed over what dress to wear, mentally high-fiving yourself when his eyes lit up at seeing you. He tried to be a gentleman, telling you he was old-fashioned and didn’t do sex on the first date, his mind changing by the end of the night when you’d both ended up naked on your living room couch.

“An hour?!” she exclaims, taking you from your reverie. “Why?”

“Well, when two people like each other very much—”

“Ew,” she interrupts. “Yuck, I don’t want to know. Anyways, I’m assuming you’re a doctor?”

Making a show of looking down at your body, you ask, “What gave me away?” You met her eyes again.

“Honestly, you’re not like any doctor I’ve met before—earlier with the tests, they were so…”

“Cold?” you finish for her. “Not very friendly?”

“Exactly.”

You sigh, moving to sit on the edge of her bed.

“There’s no bedside manner anymore,” you say. “It’s getting you fixed up and on your way—at least that’s how it is with newer doctors, the ones who’ve learned over time and didn’t actually go to school before the world went to shit. But I want to make sure you’re comfortable, and—” you look left and right like you’re making sure no one is around before looking at her again“ —It’s nice having someone new to talk to. People here are boring.”

She laughs.

“I can tell.”

It’s the right decision to save this girl. You know, in your gut, that it’s what you need to do.

Her spunkiness reminds you of Sarah, who also wouldn’t have been into two hundred and fifty-four hot new fashion, beauty, and body secrets. You’d bonded with Joel’s daughter over music, her loving your CD collection and always letting her choose what you listened to in the car, her tastes varying, which had a lot to do with her dad loving tunes from the seventies and eighties. She was a firecracker, always keeping her dad on his toes, and here was Ellie keeping you on yours.

“Let’s talk business, squirt,” you say.

Her face scrunches up, “Squirt?”

“Yeah, similar to ‘kiddo,’” you answer.

“You fucking sound like Joel—where is he, by the way? I woke up, and he wasn’t with me. People have been weird and will only say he’s okay.”

The worry is evident on her face, even though she’s trying to hide it.

“I haven’t personally seen him,” you reply. “He is okay, though. Marlene was actually heading to let him know how you’re doing.” And that they’re planning to kill you, you didn’t say out loud.

“That’s good. Don’t need him worrying.”

“I’m impressed he got you all the way here. What’s he like?”

You’re curious about the man.

“Tall, wide—” she held out her hands “—and a grumpy asshole.” Definitely not your Joel, then. “But he’s got his nice moments.” She gives you a conspiratorial look that makes you smile. “Don’t tell him I said this, but I know deep down he’s a fucking softy.”

“You’re secret’s safe with me,” you laugh.

Her face goes somber, her fingers fidgeting with the blanket under her.

“So, what’s gonna happen to me, Doc?”

Your stomach must drop all the way to the ground floor.

You couldn’t lie to her, but you didn’t want to scare her.

“They want to extract the infection from your brain to make a vaccine,” you answer truthfully.

“Who’s they?”

“Marlene and the head of this facility.”

“Oh.” She frowns. “You won’t be there?”

“I was asked to scrub in, but I won’t be operating.”

“Surgery, then?”

“Surgery.” You nod.

“Will it hurt?”

Smiling reassuringly, you answer, “Won’t feel a thing. You’ll be knocked out cold.”

“That’s good. Can I talk to Joel beforehand? I just want to thank him for everything.”

You frown, “That won’t be possible. I’ll happily relay a message to him for you.”

She looks downtrodden, eyes darting away from you.

“That works. Um, if I don’t make it, can you tell him I said thank you? For getting me here safe and not abandoning me? That I’m sorry for being such a fucking pain in his ass.”

You reach to touch her leg comfortingly.

“I’ll let him know,” you reply softly. “You know, I once knew a Joel before everything.” You wave your hand in explanation, her meeting your gaze to nod. “I was going to marry him,” you continue. “He hadn’t asked yet, but I knew he was the one. You never forget a dreamboat like Joel Miller,” you sigh wistfully.

Her eyes go round.

“Joel Miller?” she asks. “Your Joel’s last name was Miller?”

“It was.” You nod. “I loved him and his daughter Sarah.”

“Shut the fuck up.”

You’re taken aback, “I’m sorry..?”

“Sorry, sorry.” She puts up her hands in a placating gesture. “It’s just my grumpy Joel’s last name is Miller, and he had a daughter named Sarah.”

Your heart clenches, and your throat gets tight, asking thickly, “Had?”

Clear sadness comes over her face.

“I don’t know all the details, but she didn’t make it. Early on. Really fucked him up.”

Covering your mouth, you need a second, emotions warring inside you—hope that it is your Joel and unimaginable pain about Sarah, not wanting her to be gone, and thinking of all the years he would’ve been alone, wondering if he even had Tommy. It’s a struggle to keep the tears at bay.

“Your Joel Miller, does he happen to be from Texas?” you finally ask.

“Yeah,” she answers, nodding. “Sounds funny, too. His brother Tommy and him are from, I think, Houston, no, fuck, starts with an ‘A.’”

“Austin,” you breathe, eyes wide as saucers.

“Yeah!” she exclaims. “Holy shit, is my Joel your Joel?”

She’s excited by the prospect, and you’re doing everything not to cry. You need to go to him. You both need to save this girl, and once that’s done, you can have the long overdue reunion. He won’t want her to die, especially not after losing Sarah. It’s cruel that he’s been put in this spot, your blood boiling, knowing without a doubt that if he brought her here alone, the two of you could get her out, or at least you’d both die trying, and you’re willing, especially to see Joel one last time.

“I think he might be,” you reply.

“You gotta go talk to him!”

“I do.” You nod. “Do you trust me?”

She looks confused.

“What do you mean?”

“You’re going to be safe—you’re not going to die. Everything is going to be okay.”

“Okay..?”

“Good. You’re not going to see me again until after you wake up, so don’t panic, squirt. I’ll be there.”

“Okay.”

“I’m going to go see him,” you say as you stand up.

She picks up the magazine.

“Do you need kissing tips? It says here that with these techniques, you’ll rock his world.”

You snort.

“Aren’t you a goddamn comedian—you must’ve amused the hell out of Joel.”

She looks proud as she smiles.

“I made him laugh—multiple times.”

“Way to go, kiddo. Don’t tell anyone where I’m going, and I’ll see you in a bit.”

“Sounds good, Doc.”

It was your goal not to arouse any suspicions, walking briskly towards the floor you knew Joel was on, stopping to snag a scalpel, and taking the back way that was a little longer but would have you bypassing a lot of the guards since you had some time to work with, the procedure having to be delayed with nothing being ready.

Hiding in the shadows of the next room, you gasp when you hear Joel calling Marlene on her bullshit, your heart picking up in speed at the familiar Texas drawl and rasp, a stray tear falling down your cheek.

He’s here.

He’s really here and alive.

The focus needs to be on saving Ellie, so you know you can’t trip him up by revealing who you are, thankful you’d changed into your operating clothes.

When his door opens, and you hear Marlene’s footsteps heading away from you, you’re moving, scalpel held tight in your hand, knowing you need to be as quiet as possible so as not to alert the other two guards on this floor.

You don’t even look at Joel when you enter the room, focusing on your task, and executing it seamlessly, only chancing a glance once you’ve tossed him the gun.

He’s older and greyer, years of surviving making his already broad shoulders even broader, his face hardened over time, having some idea of the hell he’s been through, and still, just as he was at thirty-six, at fifty-six, he’s still the most handsome man you’ve ever laid your eyes on. Your fingers want to smooth the furrow between his eyes, kiss those plush lips of his, feel his arms engulf you, hold you tight, and never let you go.

Twenty years and you’re still madly in love with Joel Miller—one look, and you’re a fucking goner.

You can’t get your hopes up, not knowing anything about his current situation, assuming he’s probably moved on.

Who wouldn’t want him?

There’s no way he’s been single all these years. You’ve had your own flings, nothing long-lasting or very memorable.

Who could compare to Joel?

He’s the blueprint of what you want in a man, and no one could or would ever measure up.

Was your life lonely?

A little, but why tie yourself to someone you’d never be able to love because your heart belonged to another?

“Who are you?” he asks.

“No time to chat,” you reply. “We have to get Ellie—I couldn’t do it alone.” You ignore the excited flutters in your tummy at hearing his voice.

He asks another question, and you answer, leading him from the room, weapons raised, ready to face whatever comes your way, comforted with Joel at your back.

When you reach the top floor, you quickly understand how he managed to get Ellie here in one piece—the man was a killing machine—brutal, merciless, breathtaking.

The way he fought was a thing of beauty, and if you hadn’t had to focus on staying alive, you’d have loved to watch him—seeing his strength, his competence, not wasting a single shot.

Somehow, it made him more attractive, which you didn’t think was possible.

The two of you worked together so well as a pair, covering each other, moving as one to mow down anyone who crossed your path, making it to the operating room just as they were about to begin.

You feel no remorse for killing the surgeon. Frankly, you haven’t felt bad about killing another human in years because there’s no room for feeling guilty when you’re trying to survive—you compartmentalize, knowing that it’s either them or you; if you hesitate for even a fraction of a second, you’re dead, so you’ve got to pull the trigger first, and you will.

You and Joel are on the same page about getting Ellie out of there as soon as possible. You quickly take care of her IV and make sure her hand is bandaged, smiling softly when you see Joel tenderly lift the girl into his arms, murmuring quietly to her, seeing just how much he cares.

There’s no doubt in your mind he would’ve attempted this rescue alone, and the thing is, you’re pretty sure he would’ve succeeded from sheer will alone.

His eyes meet yours, seeing his trust in you, him relying on you now to get you all out.

“How do we get outta here?” he asks.

There’s no point in hiding anymore, honestly surprised your cap and mask even stayed on.

You’re not sure what his reaction will be, hoping for happiness.

When he gets a good look at you, he stumbles back in shock, the blood leaving his face, watching his eyes go wide, mouth agape, seeing the shock, the disbelief, the hope, many emotions coming over his features as he processes what’s going on.

His voice cracks as he breathes your name, and you gently smile, knowing this is probably a lot for him, raising your hand and wiggling your fingers in a wave.

“Hi, babe,” you say.

It’s noticeable on his face the realization that it really is you, and you’re here, his eyes getting misty, lips turning up, the blood in your veins thrumming when he answers like he had a thousand times before without missing a beat, “Hi, baby.”

“You’re alive,” Joel says in wonder, his eyes mapping out your face, seeing lines from aging but still just as beautiful as the first time he saw you all those years ago.

“I am,” you reply, nodding. You point at him. “You are, too. Imagine my surprise when Ellie started telling me about this grumpy asshole named Joel Miller, who brought her here—couldn’t believe it was my Joel Miller until we compared notes. Sorry to spring this on you; I know it’s a shock.”

He huffs out a breath.

“That’s a fuckin’ understatement.”

You giggle.

Is this real? Is he dreaming?

You’re just as lively as he remembers, your smile like a breath of fresh air in this godforsaken world.

There’s a sensation in his stomach, it not feeling right, hitting him a second later that the fluttering is fucking butterflies, as if he was a goddamn teenager again, talking to his crush.

Twenty fucking years, and he still has it bad.

“God, I missed you,” you say.

“I missed you, too.”

“We’ll catch up after we get the fuck out of here. We’re going out that door.” You point at the opposite wall from where you came in. “Pit stop to grab her things that are on the way. Then the elevator to the basement garage—we can get a truck. There’s multiple.”

“I need you to do somethin’ first,” he says.

Your head cocks to the side.

“What do you need?”

“Come ‘ere, my hands are full. I need you to pinch me.”

Your eyebrows drew together.

“You need me to pinch you…?” you ask slowly.

“Yeah,” he answers, nodding. “Gotta make sure I’m not dreamin’—need to know you’re really here with me.”

Your eyes soften, quickly moving around the table until you’re at his side, smiling at him as you pinch his arm, leaning in to kiss his cheek, his skin buzzing where you touch, wanting more of it.

“There,” you say, looking at him through your lashes, and it has him gulping. “Believe I’m here, now?”

“I missed you so fuckin’ much, baby,” his words come out rough, feeling the tears in his eyes.

“I missed you, too, Joel,” you reply, rubbing his arm, goosebumps erupting on his skin. “Let’s get out of here—I wanna catch up.”

He nods, “Lead the way.”

He watches you getting the rifle into your hands, him following you out of the room, stopping to grab Ellie’s backpack that was left on a hospital bed, and you putting it on.

It’s a fucking maze to find the elevator, you knowing exactly where to go, guards showing up halfway to it, commotion erupting as you told him where to go, covering him and Ellie as the three of you moved quickly down the corridors, gunshots ringing out.

You’re both panting by the time the elevator doors close, you taking point in front of him with your gun at the ready.

Joel can’t get over you being here with him.

There’s so much about you that hasn’t changed since all those years ago, somehow keeping your radiance, your life, not losing yourself to the darkness, but underneath all of that, he’s seen how you’ve adapted—killing with zero hesitation, not afraid to do what it takes to survive, a ruthlessness to you that only develops after going through some horrible shit. Guilt makes his chest squeeze, hating that you’ve been out here on your own, surviving. He at least has Tommy, had Tess, and with how easily you’re leaving with him, he doesn’t think you have anyone, and it breaks his heart.

“Do we need to worry about runnin’ into anybody else down there?” he asks.

You glance at him over your shoulder, “They would’ve called everyone to the top floor, and I’m pretty sure we took out at least ninety percent of their muscle. I can’t imagine anyone being stupid enough to try and stop us.”

He nods.

“Thank you,” he says.

“You’re welcome. I’d honestly planned on trying to get her out before I knew it was you who’d brought her. I’m thankful you were here—you’re a fucking tank. Probably wouldn’t have even needed me.”

He chuckles, his chest puffing out a little in pride.

“If I’d had to do it alone, I’d be in a helluva lot more pain, so thank you.”

“Knees?”

He nods. “And my fuckin’ back—I’ve gotten old.”

“But you still look really fucking good,” you reply with a wink, and it makes his throat go dry, his heart hammering that you’re flirting with him, that you’re still interested in him after all this time, even though he’s gone grey, and rougher around the edges. You didn’t even shy away from what he’d do to keep himself and those he cares about safe; pretty sure you even liked it.

It’s been so long, he wonders if you moved on and if he even has a chance with you.

He’s had time to mourn Tess, thankful for the years he got with her, keeping him alive and not letting him self-destruct in his grief, but even though they cared about each other to a certain extent, they’d been using one another—he was the muscle, she was the brains, and he couldn’t give her what she wanted; offer feelings that weren’t hers to have, so what they had wasn’t all that romantic, there wasn’t time for any of that shit, and Tess didn’t much care for it, anyway.

There’s history with Joel and you, memories of a time when you’d been happy together, and being here with you is making him remember all of the good times—the feelings he had for you that he’d buried deep inside after he thought you were gone, coming alive inside him, consuming him, wanting to touch you, feel your soft skin under him, and kiss you—fuck, he hasn’t kissed in so long, Tess never being very affectionate, sex always quick and a means to scratch an itch.

He clearly remembers what sex was like with you—it haunts his dreams, the time you’d spend in bed, reliving the passion, the tenderness, the love, something deep down he’s craved since the last time he was with you.

The elevator opens before he can speak, the gun raised in your hands as you exit, Joel at your back, both of you stopping in your tracks once you’re out, finding Marlene standing there with her handgun pointed towards you both.

“What’s your plan?” she asks. “You save her today, but what about tomorrow? There’s a lot of shit out there. How long before she’s killed by a pack of clickers? If she even makes it that long without being murdered first. Face it, you can’t save her.”

“We’ll sure as fuck try,” he grits out. “Stop pretendin’ like you care about her. You were happy to stand aside and let her die.”

“For the greater good, to save lives.”

“You can shove the greater good up your ass, Marlene.”

She sighs.

“You can still do the right thing.” Her attention moves to you. “Do the biopsy like you wanted. All I care about is finding the cure. I’ll put you in charge of the facility. You can lead in the vaccine’s development.”

You scoff.

“You know as well as I do,” you reply, “that I’ll be dead if I step one foot back inside there. You’re lying, Marlene. You and the rest of the Fireflies will want us killed for what happened today.”

“And who’s fault is that?” Marlene asks.

“Yours!” you exclaim. “For not listening to me. This is all your fault.”

A gun goes off, and Marlene stumbles, falling to her knees, her gun skittering across the ground when she loses her grip on it.

She’s holding her stomach, a blood stain expanding under her hands.

“Don’t,” she chokes out, looking at you with her face contorted in pain. “Don’t kill me. Let me go. Please.”

You and he both know what needs to be done.

“She ain’t safe with you alive,” he says, her attention moving to him.

“Please,” she pleads.

Another shot is fired, and Marlene’s lifeless body crumples to the ground.

“Come on,” you tell him, heading towards a nearby pickup, shouldering your rifle as you get the door open for him to set Ellie in the backseat, you disappearing for a minute and coming back to put gasoline canisters in the bed, along with a bag, telling him it had emergency rations and a first aid kit.

“Where will we go?” you ask when you get in the passenger seat, Joel already ready to drive.

“Wyoming,” he answers. “Tommy.”

Relief washes over your face.

“I’m happy to hear he’s alive,” you say softly.

A stone is in his stomach that he’ll have to tell you about Sarah.

“Yeah, that asshole’s still alive and kickin’,” he replies. “His wife scares the fuck outta me.”

“Wow, can’t believe someone married him.”

He chuckles.

“Me either—do you know how to get outta here?”

The truck’s started, Joel already driving.

“Yes!” you reply, directing him.

There’s not much talking as you make your way out of the city, both too nervous and expecting the worst. It feels like he can finally breathe once you’re on the highway heading toward Tommy’s.

Ellie’s still passed out, the pickup rumbling down the road.

“How long will she sleep for?” he asks, glancing at you.

“Oh, an hour or two,” you answer.

He nods. “We gotta do anythin’ for her?”

“Nope. Just have to wait for the drugs to wear off—she was given a cocktail that could knock out a horse.”

He frowns, nodding once.

“It’s sweet,” you reply, him seeing you with a soft smile on your lips.

“What’s that?” he asks.

“How much you care about her.”

His hands squeeze the steering wheel, the leather creaking.

“She’s a pain in the ass,” he grumbles.

That makes you laugh, and God, he’s missed that sound.

“Ellie apologizes, and I quote, ‘for being such a fucking pain in his ass,’” you giggle. “She also wanted to thank you for keeping her safe and not abandoning her.

His heart clenches up.

“She said those things?”

Your lips tip down, frowning.

“Yeah. Wanted me to tell you in case she didn’t make it.”

“Why’d you wanna save her?”

“It was the right thing to do. I fought for a way that she’d survive the operation, and I was outvoted—couldn’t let them murder her.”

After losing Sarah and thinking he lost you, too, Joel had erected walls in his mind to keep the debilitating grief he felt at bay, shoving down his emotions and not letting himself feel—couldn’t let himself feel, not if he wanted to live, which was already a struggle. This made him cold, emotionless, a husk of a man, having to keep finding something to fight for to keep going, only allowing his rage to come out in order to kill and do what was necessary to survive without a single care.

Tess would poke at the walls without meaning to, getting glimpses of his tenderness that she’d bat away and make him close back up.

Ellie made it her goal to break them down, him imagining her with a sledgehammer, laying waste to the concrete and steel, making him care, making him feel until she’d made a hole big enough to crawl inside and worm her way into his heart, the kid one of the most important people in his life now.

And then there’s you, coming out of nowhere and making the walls left standing crumble to dust simply by being here—the memories, the history, the love, igniting him, making him remember what it was like to feel again, focusing on the strongest emotion that has him feeling warmth deep down to his bones, contentedness, pure happiness, the feeling so strong he’s almost breathless.

You’re alive and with him, Ellie’s safe and sound, and he’s happy, actually happy, for the first time since everything went to hell.

And you care about Ellie, which just makes him love you even more, those butterflies in his stomach going wild.

“Thank you again for all you did,” he says.

“It’s no big deal.”

“You coulda died.”

“Would’ve been worth it.” You shrug.

He smiles.

“God, I’ve missed you.”

“Same. I have missed you every day since the last time I saw you.” Reaching your hand over, you touch his thigh, sadness on your face as you look at him. “Joel, I’m sorry about Sarah,” you say gently.

He sucks in a breath, avoiding your gaze.

“Yeah,” his voice is thick, his throat so tight it’s hard to speak, but you need to know what happened, Joel knowing how much you’d loved her, treating her as if she were your own. “It, uh, was my birthday when everything went down.”

Your hand goes to your mouth, gasping, “Joel, no.”

“Yeah.” He swallows hard. “Worst fuckin’ day of my life.” Tears were in his eyes. “Held her in my arms as she died—fuckin’ military shot her,” he spits out. “Tryin’ to contain everything they just started murderin’, took my baby girl from me,” he chokes on the words, a tear slipping down his face. “Lost her and thought I lost you, too, found your house in flames.” He wipes at the wetness in his eyes. “Fuckin’ hate remeberin’ that night—my entire world was taken from me.”

“Oh, Joel,” you whisper, moving across the bench seat to be next to him, Joel welcoming the hug you give him, wrapping your arm around his belly, and resting your head on his shoulder. “I’m sorry you had to go through all that, and I’m just so fucking sad about Sarah,” you sniffle.

He reaches to press a hand against the back of your head.

“I know, baby,” he replies.

“Was Tommy with you?”

“Yeah. He kept me alive.”

“What’d you do?”

He lets out a long sigh.

“A lot of fucked up shit.”

“Haven’t we all?”

“I guess if you’re livin’, you’d have to.”

“Isn’t that so assbackwards? What were you doing before Ellie?”

“Boston—smuggling.”

“Oooh, a criminal, isn’t that sexy.” His hand moves to hold the steering wheel again, gulping. “Sorry,” you say quickly, sitting up. “It’s rude of me to flirt with you while you’re explaining all these horrible things. I don’t even know if you’re still single; for all I know, you could have a wife and kids back in Boston.”

“No wife and no kids—I can’t, not again.” He can’t help the somber tone of his voice.

He can tell you understand from the look on your face.

“I get it,” you reply. “I, uh, made sure I couldn’t have children. The world’s too fucked, and I didn’t want to risk anything. So, had a fellow doctor help me out.”

He’s sad remembering how when you were together, you’d wanted kids with him, at least two, you’d told him, and he’d been excited by the prospect, seeing how much you cared about Sarah and her adoring you. It was painful to think about, but he’d asked his daughter a week before his birthday over breakfast if she’d be okay if he married you. She’d been ecstatic and wanted to help him pick out the ring.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers.

“Don’t be,” you wave away his apology. “Better safe than sorry.”

There’s a question sitting on the tip of his tongue that he finally asks.

“Do I gotta worry about a partner huntin’ us down to get you back?”

You scoff.

“No. Painfully single. Anyone I need to worry about?”

“Not anymore,” he answers. “There was someone months ago—they didn’t make it.”

“Jesus, Joel,” you gasp. “You can’t catch a fucking break. I know life is a bitch, but my god, do I feel like it’s taking a special interest in making you miserable.”

He sighs, running a hand through his hair.

“Yeah, that’s how it feels sometimes. God must be laughing at me.” He glances at you. “I think things are changin’ though after today. Finally think I’m gettin’ a goddamn break.”

You lean forward, knocking your knuckles on the dashboard.

“We don’t have wood, but I’m being safe—don’t want to jinx you.”

“Thanks for lookin’ out.” He smiles.

“Always.” You grin.

“Tell me what happened with you,” he says. “How’d I lose you?”

It’s something he’s wondered for twenty years, needing to know what happened to you.

“As you know, I was interning at the clinic to complete my residency—”

He did know that. You were fresh out of med school when you’d met, honestly surprising him that you let an old guy like him get your number.

“And I’d had your birthday off,” you continued. “When they called me in, I went, but something didn’t feel right about halfway, so I turned around to head back to your place. A tire went flat.”

“The spare was flat, too, wasn’t it?”

“Yes…”

“I told you I’d take care of it, but you wouldn’t let me.”

“I didn’t want to be a bother!”

“You weren’t no bother—you were my girlfriend, and it was my job to make sure you were safe. I shoulda just fuckin’ done it. Fuck.” He hits the steering wheel.

He felt like this was all his fault. So much could’ve been different if he’d done this one thing.

“Hey, hey.” You rub his arm. “This isn’t on you. I was the dumbass.”

He meets your eyes.

“Twenty years,” he says. “Fuckin’ lost you for twenty goddamn years because of a tire?”

He can’t fucking believe it.

You’re looking down, “Yeah,” you whisper.

He sighs loudly, squeezing your thigh.

“Sorry about gettin’ upset, it’s just, God, think of what our lives coulda been.”

“I’m sorry, Joel. I fucked up.”

“No, baby. You were busy becomin’ a doctor, already stretchin’ yourself thin datin’ me. I shoulda done more.”

“You did more than enough, and you had your own stuff to worry about—Sarah, your construction company. I’m an adult. I should’ve made sure my shit was taken care of.”

He sighs.

“You’re here now, and that’s all that matters.”

“I am.”

“What’d you do after gettin’ out of Austin?”

“Searched for you. Doctors were in need, so I traveled a lot in the early days offering aid and hoping I’d find you. Some years later, I got snatched up by the Fireflies, thinking maybe they had the right idea, eventually helping to try to make a vaccine. Was at the research facility for the last five years, but things were so fucked. I know I would’ve gotten out soon if I hadn't left today.”

“What do you wanna do now?”

He’s hoping you’ll say you want to stay with him, wanting you back.

“Um, well, seeing as I’m unattached, and you’re unattached, I thought I’d follow you around? Wherever you go, I’ll go,” you answer. “I’m not sure if you can tell, but I never got over you, Joel. Never. I thought I lost you, mourned what was and could’ve been, and I was never able to really be with anyone because I still loved you, and seeing you today, being with you, it’s evident I still love you. So, if you’ll have me, I wanna stay with you, I don’t want to be away from you ever again, and I know Ellie is important to you—I’ve known her less than a day, and she’s already pretty fucking important to me, too. She’s a good kid, and I’m glad you’ve got her. I’m just really fucking hoping you’d maybe want me around, too.”

His heart’s squeezing so tight it’s hard to breathe, so happy that you’d want to be with him again, but doubt rears its ugly head that this is all too good to be true, that you don’t know what you’re signing up for.

“I ain’t him,” he sighs, running a hand through his hair.

“You’re not who?” you ask, confused.

“I ain’t the same man you fell in love with.”

“You think I don’t know you’ve changed? We killed together today. You’ve been referred to as a ‘grumpy asshole’ by someone who’s been around you for months. I’m not expecting you to be the man you were twenty years ago—we’ve been through literal hell. I know I sure as fuck am not the same.” You grab his thigh. “We can figure it out, get to know each other again. However, I think it’s safe to say with how easily we’ve fallen back into things, there isn’t much to worry about.” You softly smile. “We’re not the same people we were before this shit, but I think the love’s still there. At least, it is on my end. You’re fine, babe,” you reassure, rubbing over his jeans. “Don’t stress. We can make this work if you’re willing.”

He met your eyes, seeing the truth shining brightly in the depths and knowing without a doubt you meant what you were saying, wanting to kiss you so badly.

“I’m so fuckin’ willin’,” he says. “I just don’t want you to be disappointed.”

“Impossible.” You smile. “I’ll take you any way I can get you.”

He knows you mean it, and it has his heart swelling, thinking maybe things are changing for the better, that he’s being given a second chance at life, and he’s not gonna waste it.

“Wanna know the moment I knew you loved me?” he asks, reminiscing about the past.

It’s how he’d known you were the one for him.

A curious expression is on your face, smiling at him.

“Tell me.”

“When you didn’t even bat an eye at bein’ fired from the clinic in town for datin’ me.”

“Oh my god, I wasn’t fired. I was forcibly relocated.”

He chuckles.

“If that’s what you wanna call it. You datin’ a patient made it to where the only clinic that’d take you was an hour and a half away in the city.”

“You make it sound like I was dating you while you were still my patient—you were in my care once, and by the end of the appointment, you’d seduced me.” He snorts. “I was never your doctor again, so it wasn’t unethical. I had to be forcibly relocated for breaking a dumb clinic-specific rule that made zero sense because Janis was jealous you were dating me and not her and reported me. Fucking, Janis,” you seethe.

“If it makes you feel any better, she’s probably dead now,” he says.

You chortle before covering your mouth in shock.

“That’s fucking dark, Joel.”

“You were thinkin’ it.”

“I mean, yeah, the odds aren’t very good. You wanna know something, though, about the whole me being forcibly relocated to the city?”

He met your eyes, seeing that smile he loved.

“What’s that?”

“It was worth it—you were worth it. I’d do it all over again and happily be forcibly relocated so I can date you.”

That has him feeling soft.

“Am I still worth it?” he asks, barely above a whisper.

“Twenty years might have come and gone. I’m not that young piece of ass I once was—“

He makes a face, cutting you off, “You were never a piece of ass to me,” he says seriously. “I loved you—still love you, never fuckin’ stopped. Before everything went to fuckin’ shit, I saw us havin’ a life together—was gonna ask you to move in that night, had a key ready to give you. I wanted to marry you, have kids, and spend the rest of our lives together because you were my everything.” His voice cracks when he speaks again, “You and Sarah, you both were my entire fuckin’ world.” He clears his throat to compose himself. “I loved you so fuckin’ much I spent years tryin’ to find you. Years. When there wasn’t any sign, I figured I lost you, too, and with you gone, my last shred of humanity went, too, because I no longer had anythin’ to live for. I loved you,” he croaks. “I still love you, and I’ll never stop until the day I die.”

Tears roll down your cheeks.

“I love you, too,” you say.

His arm moves around your shoulder to pull you into him, hugging you as best he can and kissing your hair.

“I’m happy to have you back—want you with me if you can accept that I’m fucked up.”

“We’re in the same boat. It’s crazy what an apocalypse does to people.”

You stay like that, him holding you against him while you both talk, reminiscing about before, sharing your favorite stories about Sarah, comfortable with each other, and talking so easily like no time had passed at all.

An hour goes by, Joel navigating the road as you chat.

“I feel like I got hit by a truck,” a voice says in the backseat. Ellie sits up, rubbing her eyes. “My head feels so fucking weird.”

“Hey, take it easy,” he says. “Drugs are still wearin’ off.”

“Welcome to the land of the living,” you say.

She must notice how you’re cuddled up next to him, seeing her eyes get big in the rearview mirror.

“Woah, you really didn’t need those kissing tips, Doc.”

You snort, and Joel’s curious about what she means.

“What’s she talkin’ about?” he asks.

“She’s being a smartass.”

He huffs out an amused breath.

“She’s always a smartass,” he replies.

You move to look over the seat at her.

“Just feeling woozy? Anything hurt?” you ask.

“Brain’s all foggy. Nothing hurts.” She touches her head, looking confused. “What happened? Did they do the procedure?”

“They didn’t,” you answer, shaking your head. “We—”

He interrupts you, “They found somebody else,” he says quickly, knowing Ellie won’t take what you did well. “There was another like you, and they chose them.”

He doesn’t want to meet your eyes because he knows you’re staring him down.

Ellie’s not buying it; he can see it on her face, making him grimace, and swallow hard, knowing he fucked up, shame roiling in his gut.

“So, Joel is a fucking liar,” you say, eyes still on him. “I can’t believe you—she deserves to know.”

“She ain’t gonna like it,” he says.

“You don’t know that.”

“What won’t I like?” Ellie pipes up. “What’s going on, guys? Be straight with me, Doc.”

Your attention moves to her.

“They were going to kill you.”

“Oh,” she says quietly. “I was okay with dying if it meant saving people's lives.”

“That’s very courageous, Ellie, and I understand you want to help, but they didn’t need to kill you. What was the point if they had and a cure couldn’t be made?”

Her eyebrows furrow.

“They still would’ve had a chance to try!” she says hotly. Joel knew she’d be mad; the kid was determined to be a martyr. “It could’ve worked, and you took away my shot to help do some good!”

“They were going to murder you,” you calmly reply.

“I was willing to die!”

“Well, I ain’t willin’ to lose you!” His voice rises.

“It wasn’t your choice, Joel! It was mine!”

“You don’t know what you’re sayin’, and you ain’t listen’ to her either!” He tilts his head towards you. “They coulda gotten what they needed without murderin’ you, but they didn’t care.” He looks at you. “Baby, tell her your plan if you would’ve had the chance.”

“We could’ve gone in,” you say, “and biopsied some of the infection—it intertwines with the brain, so just a little bit somewhere that wouldn’t do you any harm.”

“Well, why don’t we go back there and do that then?” she asks, sounding hopeful.

You sigh.

“Because the Fireflies were so deadset on taking your entire brain, they were willing to kill anyone who got in their way.”

“You killed them,” she breathes, eyes wide.

“We did.” You nod.

“What do I do now? Why am I here?” She’s upset. “Why am I immune, Doc? Are there others like me?”

“We’ve never come across anyone else immune—somehow, the infection has mutated in your body. It’s a new development, something we’ve never seen.”

“And the people who could’ve figured out what the fuck is going on with me are all dead? Great.” She falls back into her seat, pressing her hands to her face. “I needed it all to mean something.” Her words are muffled, looking up at you with wet eyes. “All of the people who’ve died for me. First, my friend Riley who was there when I was bitten—the two of us planning to die together, and my turn never coming. Then Tess and Sam. It needs to mean something. Their deaths can’t have been for nothing! Why do I get to live, and they don’t? What’s the point of me being immune if I can’t do something good with it?”

“Hey, Ellie.” You reach over the seat to touch her arm. “There’s still hope. If I can get access to the right equipment, I can do the biopsy. It might take some time, but I’m capable and have spent many years working to find a cure. There’s hope, kiddo. They didn’t die for nothing, you’re still here, and we’ll have the chance to see what we find.”

“You promise?” she sniffs.

“I promise.”

“Okay.”

“Is there something you want to say, Joel?” You look at him pointedly.

He sighs.

“Sorry for lyin’ to you, Ellie. It wasn’t right.”

Her face lights up.

“Oh, Doc’s got you whipped!” she laughs. “This is so fucking funny.”

“Ellie,” he grumbles, glaring at her in the mirror.

“You’re fucking forgiven, Joel, but I’m still gonna give you shit about being in love,” she sing-songs.

“Christ,” he sighs.

“It’s okay, babe,” you say, rubbing his arm. “We’ll just gross her out with excessive PDA.”

That has him perking up.

“Excessive?” he asks, looking at you and seeing your mischievous smile.

“Wait,” Ellie says. “What’s PDA?”

“Public displays of affection,” you both say simultaneously.

She makes a face.

“Like kissing?” she asks.

You look at her, grinning.

“Yes,” you answer. “And inappropriate touching.”

“Ew.” Ellie mock gags. “Disgusting. I don’t need to see that shit. Keep it to yourselves.”

“Sometimes when two people love each other very much, they can’t help—”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, sappy bullshit,” Ellie interrupts. “I’m good. Don’t look back here. I’m putting on actual clothes.”

About forty miles from Tommy’s, the truck breaks down on a mountain highway with no way to salvage it, having to walk the rest of the way, gathering your belongings for the half-day trek.

Ellie is a delightful conversationalist, telling you about the trip she and Joel made, poking jabs at him here and there that have him looking grumpy and you laughing.

The three of you are on high alert, even while talking, Joel and you gripping your rifles tight with the young girl between you as you walk for a few hours, finding an old abandoned farmhouse to stay in for the night when the sun begins to set.

It’s just your luck that there’s a stream running through the property, and though it’s too cold to fully bathe, you and Joel take the opportunity to wash up with a bar of soap pilfered from the home to get all of the blood and grime off your skin while Ellie explores the house.

There’s tension between you and Joel, and it’s thick, palpable, fueled by the shared looks and finding his eyes on your body more times than you can count; you’re just as obvious with your interest, checking him out at every opportunity, marveling at how his flannel hugs that chest of his, and his jeans making his ass look incredible, your fingers itching to touch him, and feel his warm skin.

To add fuel to the fire, he hasn’t kissed you yet.

Hours you’ve been back together, and not one single kiss to your lips, knowing he wants to, seeing his gaze lingering on your mouth when he talks to you, wondering to yourself what’s keeping him from going for it, and it was taking everything in you not to make the first move.

It has you desperate and aching, just wanting to feel his lips on yours and his arms around you once more, knowing it will be so fucking good, but in the back of your mind, you know his hesitance is Ellie. After what she said on the drive, he didn’t want to make her feel uncomfortable, which was sweet of him, but it’s been twenty years, and you’re jonesing for just one kiss.

Inside the house, Joel goes about barricading all of the doors on the first floor with furniture, refusing your help, which leaves you to stand off to the side, getting flustered because the man’s putting on a damn show.

He pushes up his sleeves, allowing you to see his muscles flex as he works, seeing his strength while he manhandles a china cabinet, sinfully grunting, sweat beading on his skin. It has you all hot and bothered, thanking the powers that be, Ellie was in another room going through stuff so as not to see you openly gawking, knowing the girl would give you shit about it.

With the last door secure, he turns to you, wiping at his forehead with the back of his arm, a knowing smile on his lips when he asks, “Is there somethin’ on my face? You’ve been starin’ an awfully long time.”

You narrow your eyes, crossing your arms over your chest.

“Yeah, I was staring because you were being a damn tease.”

He matches your stance, crossing his arms and looking amused.

“I was movin’ furniture. How is that me bein’ a tease?”

“You were moving the furniture suggestively. You know exactly what you were doing.”

“I don’t know what you’re talkin’ about. I was just makin’ sure we’re safe for the night.”

“Uh-huh, right. You’re a damn tease, Joel Miller.”

Three steps, and he’s in your space, your breath hitching when his big hands land on your hips, leaning his face close enough to your own that your noses almost touch.

You’d forgotten how much real estate his palms can take up, your skin tingling under their breadth, arousal burning in your belly.

“You think I was bein’ a tease?” he asks in a low rasp, his eyes moving between yours and your lips.

“Yes,” you breathe.

“Lemme show how much of a tease I can be, baby.”

Your eyes widen.

“Oh god.”

“You drippin’ for me? Thinkin’ about how it felt to have me inside? How I stretched you open? How you always felt me the next day?”

It feels like your skin is on fire, your body so hot, your heart pounding in your chest because now you are thinking about it, and it’s making you throb between your legs.

A whimper falls from your lips as he nudges your nose with his, mouths so close you can feel his breath.

“Bet your panties are drenched for me, baby. Bet you’d love me to slide my hand down them to touch your pretty little pussy, and feel just how wet you are.”

You’re pretty sure you’ll explode if he doesn’t do something, harshly whispering, “Fucking kiss me already, Joel!”

He smiles, chuckling.

“Got you all needy. Alright, I’ll kiss you.”

There’s a possibility your heart might jump out of your chest as he starts moving, knowing what’s about to happen.

“Fuck, I’m starving,” Ellie says as she enters the room. Joel steps away from you, and you cannot stop the strangled whine that comes from your throat. “You okay, Doc?”

Clearing your throat, you turn to face her, smiling.

“Just peachy.”

She seems to accept your answer, a book held in her hands.

“As I was saying,” Ellie starts. “I’m fucking starving. We got anything to eat?”

The three of you shared some jerky on the drive and nothing more, realizing you haven’t had an actual meal since that morning at the hospital, your stomach suddenly growling.

“Seems it’s dinner time,” Joel says. He looks at you, “You brought those rations, right?”

“I did,” you answer, walking to the rundown dining table that you’d plopped your bag onto, Joel’s backpack next to it. Rummaging through what you have, you say, “Looks like we’re having a variety of canned goods.”

“Got any peaches?” Ellie asks.

“Yep!” you answer, grabbing the can.

“Fuck yeah! I call dibs,” she replies, coming over to take it from you.

All of you sit at the table to eat, Joel across from you, Ellie at the head seat, everyone relatively quiet as you chow down, feeling his eyes on you and pretending like you don’t notice.

“What did you find?” you ask her.

She meets your gaze, setting down her fork to pick up the book.

“Something called ‘Jurassic Park,’” she says. “It’s got dinosaurs, which I thought was fucking cool.”

“The movies were really good,” you reply.

Her eyes get bigger.

“They made movies about this?” She holds it up.

“Yeah,” you answer. “Three. I’ve never read the book, though. Let me know how it is.”

“I��m gonna start it tonight after dinner. Did you ever see the movies, Joel?”

He doesn’t answer, too focused on you.

“Earth to Joel,” she says, leaning forward to wave her hand in front of his eyes, his head turning towards her quickly.

“Did you say somethin’?” he asks.

“Yeah.” She’s grinning, clearly amused. “You know, if you stare at her any harder, she might catch on fire.”

His eyebrows dip down.

“I wasn’t starin’,” he grumbles, his elbows on the table while he takes a bite, looking at his can.

“Jesus, Joel, I was not prepared for you being a lovesick fool. It’s honestly gross. Thank god you weren’t like this with Tess.”

His head snaps up as you tense, knowing she’s mentioned that name before.

“That’s enough, Ellie.” His tone’s severe.

You look at him, your eyebrows pinched together.

“Who’s Tess?” you ask.

Ellie’s eyes go big.

“Oh, shit,” she says. “I’m sorry, Joel. I didn’t realize she didn’t know.”

“Who’s Tess?” you ask again.

“It’s alright, Ellie,” He sighs, long and loud, running a hand through his hair. He looks at you. “Tess was my old partner in Boston. She, uh, died on the trip to bring Ellie to the Fireflies.”

“Oh,” you reply, nodding. “The one you’d mentioned. I’m sorry she didn’t make it.”

“It’s just how these things go,” he says.

“Your girlfriend died…” you say slowly. “You’re allowed to be sad about it.”

He grimaces.

“It wasn’t like that.”

“Well, I’m going to finish eating upstairs,” Ellie says, the chair scraping across the floor as she gets up quickly. “You two need to be alone.”

He looks at her.

“You don’t gotta do that,” he replies.

“No, no,” she says, grabbing her can and book. “I am so happy not to be a part of this.” She briskly walks away.

He sighs, pressing his hands to his face.

“What do you mean it wasn’t like that?” you ask. “If you were partners—clearly romantic…”

Meeting your gaze, he answers, “It wasn’t romantic. We cared about each other, we kept each other alive, and occasionally fucked, but there was nothing romantic about it. I didn’t feel that way about her, and can probably count on one hand how many times we even kissed. I didn’t love her. I couldn’t love her.”

You know the answer before you even ask the question, and still, it catches you by surprise.

“Why not?” you ask.

“Because she wasn’t you.”

“Joel,” you whisper.

“You were it for me. You were always it for me, and if I couldn’t have you, then I didn’t want anyone else.”

“It was the same for me,” you reply. “Felt cruel to try and be with someone when I could never love them, so I just didn’t.”

“Yeah. I was always upfront about what I was willin’ to give.”

“Gotta set expectations.” You nod. “Don’t want to hurt feelings.”

He lets out a long breath, looking away.

“Still got hurt anyway.”

“Honestly, if you told me not to fall in love with you, I think I’d just fall harder, so it makes sense.” You shrug. “You’re still a goddamn dreamboat of a man.”

His eyes meet yours again, crookedly smiling.

“Dreamboat?” he asks.

“God, yeah. Look at you. The grey is sexy, and my god, I think you have more muscles than when we were together.”

There’s a change in his gaze, seeing his eyes go darker.

“You wanna find out?” he asks.

“Um, yes, I would very much like to do a study and compare it to previous findings.”

He nods, pointing at your can.

“Finish eatin’.”

“But—”

“Dinner first,” he cuts you off. “Then you can check me out. Gonna need your energy.” He winks, and you gulp, rubbing your thighs together to ease the ache as you do as he says, both of you finishing your food in silence.

Ellie’s upstairs, and the two of you are alone down here, anticipation welling up inside you because you know at some point, everything between you both will finally erupt, and you can tell it’s going to be explosive.

He leans back in his chair when he finishes, resting his hands behind his head, his eyes on yours, waiting for you, and smiling when you push your can away.

His voice is deeper, drawl more pronounced when he speaks. “I was gonna stay down here and keep watch for the night,” he rasps. “You’re more than welcome to rest upstairs if you’re tired.”

He says one thing, but those darkened eyes of his say another.

“We both know I’m staying with you.”

Smiling, he replies, “I hoped you would.”

“There’s no furniture, so we’ll have to get comfortable on the floor.”

“If I remember correctly, you quite enjoyed the floor.” He smirks.

You suck in a breath, memories of the two of you being so turned on by the time you got back to your house, you didn’t make it past the entryway, him fucking you on the rug.

Your skin is burning up, clearing your throat.

“I’ll grab us some pillows from upstairs,” you say, the chair making noise as you get up.

He nods, “Okay.”

Quickly you’re moving, taking the stairs two at a time, figuring out which room Ellie’s in with the door shut, glad she chose one on the other side of the house and managing to find four pillows in the other rooms, hugging them to your chest as you return to Joel.

He’s looking out the living room window, his body tense, taking in his profile, his attention shifting to you when he hears your footsteps.

The center of the living room is bare, the lone couch against the front door, the coffee table pushed against a wall, leaving the space between you and him empty, stopping in your tracks when he faces you.

His shoulders visibly relax, the two of you stuck in place, staring at each other with looks like you cannot believe the other is there and alive. Years of thinking you’d never see one another again, and now you’re in the same room, breathing the same air, feeling so relieved and happy.

Something shifts, both of you realizing you’re alone and don’t have to fear any interruptions, the energy igniting, eyes going dark with want—all of the hours you’ve spent together building up the tension for this very moment, it snapping with the pillows falling to the floor, unable to keep away from each other any longer, closing the distance in quick steps.

His hands cup your face when he reaches you, crashing his mouth to yours, kissing you desperately, feeling his happiness, his joy, each press of his lips telling you he’s happy you’re alive and here with him. The passion has your fingers threading into his grey waves of hair for something to hold onto, gasping when he eagerly licks into your mouth, him groaning when his tongue slides along your own. Your blood is singing in your veins at how right it feels, how familiar it is, twenty years, and you still know how to kiss each other, finding your rhythm, not able to get enough, both so greedy you don’t stop until your lungs ache for oxygen, coming up for air with gasping breaths.

He’s kissing along your jaw, speaking into your skin, “I missed you so fuckin’ much, baby.”

“I missed you, too. Every goddamn day.”

Hands start wandering, needing to feel each other; he’s squeezing and touching anything he can; you’re working the buttons on his shirt and pushing it open to touch his warm skin, mapping out his muscles and the scars littered all over his torso that weren’t there before, wanting to kiss each and every one.

He’s sucking at your pulse point, palming your breast, his other hand grabbing a handful of your ass, your skin buzzing, arousal pooling in your belly.

“I love you,” he rasps as his lips meet yours again. “Never stopped lovin’ you,” he murmurs.

“I love you, too,” your words muffled, moaning when his hand finds its way between your legs, cupping your sex.

“I need you,” he says between kisses. “I’m so fuckin’ hard.” He grabs your hand to press it to his bulge, feeling him straining against his zipper, your cunt clenching at the reminder of just how big he is.

“Oh, god,” you moan. “I’ve missed your dick.”

“I’ve missed bein’ inside you. Wanna feel you again.”

As great as that sounds, your drenched panties indicating just how much you want it—there’s one small problem.

You pull back to see his eyes at half mast and glazed over in lust.

“We can’t fuck,” you say.

He frowns, eyebrows pinching together.

“Why not?” he asks.

“I love you, Joel. I love you a whole hell of a lot—would die for you, but you haven’t showered in days, you’re literally a walking UTI, and as much as I’d love to have that big dick inside me, I am not, risking an infection.” His frown goes deeper. “We can do other stuff, though!” you continue, and that gets his attention. “Hand stuff—no blow job until you’re clean,” you quickly add. He’s thinking it over, the wheels turning.

“I get it,” he finally responds. “You’re the doctor. You know what you’re talkin’ about. After a good scrub, you’d wanna?” he asks, looking hopeful.

“God, yes. I’m praying there’s someplace to wash when we get to Tommy’s.”

He smiles.

“They’ve got workin’ water in the houses—hot water. I can take a shower to get all nice and clean for you, and I’m sure he’ll set us up someplace with a bed.”

“Nobody better need us for a day or two, then,” you say, hooking your arms around his neck. “We won’t be leaving it.”

“Is that so?” He crookedly smiles.

“Oh, yeah. We’ve got time to make up for, and I want to feel you for days.”

He kisses your chin, lightly nibbling on it before trailing along your jaw to your neck.

“You gonna let me fuck you full of me? Fill you up?”

“Until I’m stuffed,” you moan, pussy pulsing at his words.

“Fuck,” Joel groans. “You’re gonna fuckin’ kill me.”

“You love it, though.”

His head comes up, looking you in the eyes.

“Love you more,” he rasps, kissing you hard with his hands on your waist, thumbs playing with the waistband of your scrub pants. “When’s the last time you showered?” His question said into your lips.

“This morning.”

“Thank Christ.”

It’s disorienting how suddenly he pulls back, confusion on your face as he bends, roughly pulling your panties and pants down your legs.

“What are you doing, Joel?” you ask as the cool air hits your bare skin.

“I can’t fuck you, but you didn’t say anything about my mouth.”

He unties your shoes, sending them thudding across the floor.

“You’re gonna eat me out?” you gasp. “Right here.”

You have to hold onto his shoulders for balance as he gets your lower half undressed.

“Right fuckin’ here.”

Once you’re naked from the waist down, he’s groaning as he gets up, kissing you quickly before he moves the short distance to grab a pillow, letting it fall to the floor beside you when he returns, watching as he discards his shirt, and unbuckles his pants, getting them undone.

You can tell he has a plan, knowing exactly what he wants, and you’re happy to go along for the ride. A surprised sound leaves your mouth when he kisses you hard, all tongues and teeth, his body pressed to yours, his hand squeezing your bare ass, while the other moves down your front, moaning when blunt fingers slip through your folds.

“Fuck, you get so wet for me,” he says into your lips.

Your heart is thudding, pleasure radiating in your core as he pushes through your wetness, moaning when he circles your clit, unable to stop from canting your hips into his hand.

“Fuckin’ needy for me, baby.” He nips at your lip before kissing you hungrily, swallowing your soft sounds while your fingers grip his hair.

It’s been so long, and it feels just like you remember. Joel still knows how to play your body, gathering moisture on two fingertips to work against your bundle of nerves, applying the right pressure, circling it just how you liked, his tongue sliding along your own, heightening the arousal, building you up.

With your eyes closed, it feels like you’re back in that little house you had in Austin, him stopping by on his lunch break for a quickie, you both too horny to bother going to the bedroom.

“Wanna feel you come on my hand,” he murmurs.

You whine when he presses one thick finger into you, your hands gripping tighter in his grey waves, when the second one pushes in alongside it, stretching your walls and easing the ache of emptiness.

“Oh, fuck, Joel,” you moan. “It feels so good.”

He pumps his digits, hearing the wet suck of your pussy taking them, it sounding obscene between your legs, him working them in and out, filling you over and over again. His thumb presses into your clit, rubbing it while his fingers work; every nerve in your body lit up, fire burning in your belly, knowing this was going to be quick.

Your tongues are tangling, lost in what he’s doing to you, how he’s making you feel, memories of the past, happiness for the future now that he’s here, all of it overwhelming you, rocketing you towards your release, and he knows your close, has always been able to tell.

His mouth separates from yours to speak, “Open your eyes, baby. Wanna see you come.”

You do as he says, seeing his so dark only a sliver of brown remain, looking at you like you’re the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen in his entire life. Panting breaths filling the air, hearing his fingers, Joel taking up your vision, focusing on him, and only him, the world dropping away, everything else forgotten.

He crooks his fingers, and a second later, he’s hitting nirvana, a strangled moan pulled from your throat, your legs going wobbly at the white-hot jolt of pleasure, him having to hold you against him with his other arm to keep you standing.

“There it fuckin’ is,” he rasps. “Come for me—soak my fingers, baby.”

You tumble over the edge with a cry of his name, waves of your arousal spilling around his digits as you tense up, clenching down on him hard, your body alight in ecstasy.

“So good to me,” he groans. “My good fuckin’ girl.”

His mouth is back on yours, kissing you deeply as he works you through your orgasm, every muscle in your body relaxing, brain a pleasurable haze.

God, you’ve missed him. It’s been way too long since you’ve come that hard, and now that you’ve gotten one, you want more, need more.

He breaks the kiss, removing his fingers from you, and you miss them already.

He’s crookedly grinning, eyes bright.

“Do I still got it?” he asks cheekily.

You giggle, playfully slapping at his naked chest.

“Yes, you’ve still got it,” you reply. “Played me like a goddamn fiddle. Haven’t come like that since…” Your eyes squint while you think. “Well, fuck,” you say. “Haven’t come like that since you.”

His chest puffs up in pride, and it makes you snort.

He steals a kiss.

“Fuckin’ glad I didn’t forget how you like your pussy touched.”

“Obviously, it was important to your survival—gotta know how to shoot a gun and finger pussy.”

He chuckles, moving to look you in the eyes.

“Yeah. Lemme see if I remember how to eat it,” he husks, seeing the hunger in his gaze as he lewdly sucks you off his fingers with a groan making your cunt clench. His digits leave his mouth, “Taste even better than I remember. Can I eat your pussy?”

“Yeah,” you reply, nodding your head.

Thinking about it, you’re pretty sure the last person who gave you oral was Joel. Your body is thrumming in anticipation, feeling your arousal coating your inner thighs, excited because you know it will be good.

He crookedly smiles, tenderly kissing you before he gets onto the floor, his head on the pillow while he lays on his back.

This is where you get confused because you should be the one in that position, right?

Tapping on his chest, he says, “I need you to sit right here.”

That’s when it hits what he wants, and your eyes go wide.

“Joel, we are old. I’ll break your neck.”

He makes a face.

“Stop that. You’re not gonna break my neck. Just cause we’ve aged doesn’t mean you can’t sit on my face.”

“My knees would disagree.”

“That’s what the pillow’s for,” he smirks, patting it.

“Jesus Christ, Joel,” you say, moving to sit where he indicated.

Did you think this was a bad idea? Definitely, but the man is so damn eager that you can’t help but want to give it a go.

He’s looking up at you, his hands on your hips.

“Remember how I like it?” he asks.

“Basically suffocating between my thighs?” you ask with a raised eyebrow.

“Exactly,” he replies, slapping your ass and making you squeak.

“If you need to tap out, you better fucking do it, Joel.”

“Of course, baby. Now get up ‘ere. It’s been twenty years too long since I’ve tasted your pussy.”

“Well, aren’t you just rarin’ to go,” you tease.

“Givin’ me shit about how old I am, and now you’re makin’ fun of how I talk?” He smacks your ass again. “Bad girl. Stop hollerin’ down a well, darlin’, and ride my face—I’m rarin’ to eat your pretty little cunt.”

Your head falls back as you laugh, not at all surprised when hands grab onto your ass and start scooting you closer to his waiting mouth, Joel manhandling you into position.

“That was the most yeehaw you’ve ever sounded,” you giggle, your knees sinking into the cushiony pillow on either side of his head, appreciating that he thought to grab it.

You’re sitting up, hovering over his mouth, shivering when there’s a wet streak of lips pressing kisses along your inner thigh, savoring the scratch of his beard.

Fuck, he’s gonna have you coming quickly; you just know it with how your pussy is throbbing.

“You know I don’t fuckin’ talk like that,” he says below you, kissing your other thigh.

His hands are gripped tight on the globes of your ass, squeezing your plump flesh.

“No, you don—“ the word breaks into a moan as he pulls you down, breathing you in, the hot air ghosting over your sensitive flesh, sparks dancing in your center when he nudges your clit with his nose.

His voice is muffled, “Smell better than I remember,” he groans. “Gotta taste. Sit.”

He’s helping you lower down until you’re touching his skin, not satisfied until his face is fully buried in your sex. You scrabble for something to hold onto at the first swipe of his tongue, your fingers landing in his hair.

“Oh, fuck,” you moan.

One taste and he becomes ravenous, his loud groans vibrating against your heat, obscenely licking and sucking, his hands guiding you so he can slurp up every last drop of your arousal he can get, drinking down everything he can, relishing in the prickle of his facial hair.

It’s so much better than you ever could’ve imagined, the man feasting on you like a starving man, rocking your hips, his fingers digging into your ass, humming appreciatively as electricity ignites under your skin, body vibrating, Joel working you up.

You’re gasping his name, feeling your orgasm build. His lips wrap around your clit, sucking it into his mouth, the pleasure causing your eyes to roll back in your head, moaning loudly, tightening your fingers in his grey waves.

“I’m so close,” you gasp. “Oh, fuck, Joel. It’s so good. You’re so fucking good. I’ve missed you.” You’re so drunk on what he’s doing, you’re rambling. “I’ve missed this. Don’t stop. Make me come.”

You feel him groaning, Joel doubling down and focusing on your bundle of nerves—sucking it, licking it, lips and tongue worshipping you until you’re cresting, body seizing up as euphoria floods your system with a gasp of his name.

His loud, long groan vibrates against your sex, his mouth moving to drink your release straight from the source, pushing his tongue inside of you as deep as possible, licking into you eagerly, wanting to get every little bit of you as he can.

Your body’s trembling, pussy fluttering, panting out breaths, feeling so fucking good as Joel helps you ride out your high.

You can’t remember the last time you’ve had this much pleasure, and it’s intoxicating. You’re used to getting yourself off with your hand when the need arises and have only had a few partners over the years—the sex always quick and to the point, an orgasm never guaranteed, and here was Joel making you come twice in less than an hour.

He’s spoiling you, you’re addicted, you never want him to leave.

Broad strokes of his tongue through your slippery folds has your back arching, surprised he’s still going, knowing it must be hard to breathe down there. Your body is scorching, feeling like you’re burning from the inside out as he licks every inch of you, reacquainting himself with your cunt.

He lifts you up a little, and you hear him take a big breath.

“Ride my tongue, baby.” His voice is rough, strained. “Use me to get yourself off.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m damn sure.” He smacks your ass. “Be a good girl and use me.”

You suck in a breath, pussy squeezing hard around nothing. He doesn’t let you reply, sticking his tongue out and pulling you down on top of it.

Your legs are closed around his head, his beard scratching against your thighs, hanging onto his hair for balance.

Grinding yourself against the flat of his tongue, he lets out a long broken moan, his grip on your ass tightening as you do as he asks, chasing your pleasure, using him, still so sensitive from your previous orgasms that the familiar heat was already growing in the base of your spine.

His mouth is hot and wet, working yourself up, pressing your clit hard against his muscle, moaning at the sparks of electricity shooting through you as you rubbed along it over and over again.

He’s groaning loudly beneath you, and you can tell he’s enjoying this just as much as you are, going faster, eyes squeezed shut, panting out moans. You know your skin will be tender from his beard, and you don’t care—this is worth it, your pleasure heightening, muscles in your belly beginning to tighten, Joel drowning in your pussy.

The sensations overtake you, everything coming together, falling over the edge with a cry of his name. Your legs are squeezing his head so tight as the wave of pleasure rolls through you, starting in your core and spreading to the tips of your fingers and toes.

Joel makes a strangled noise beneath you that has your eyes flying open, almost falling on your face as you quickly move off of him, ending up with your ass on his chest, looking down at him between your legs, your heart hammering in fear that you killed him—his eyes are closed, face completely lax, and glistening from your juices, his arms laying limply at his sides.

“Joel?” You pat his cheek. “I swear to god, Joel, if you die from suffocating in my pussy, I am bringing you back to life to kill you myself.”

“Not dead,” he slurs, eyes still closed.

“Thank god.” You rub your thumbs over his eyebrows and down his cheeks, sliding your fingers into the hair over his ears, him humming contentedly. “You okay?”

“Yeah. Came so fuckin’ hard.”

Your eyes widen, looking behind you to find his softened cock out of his jeans and resting on his stomach, streaks of come painting his skin.

“Oh my god,” you breathe. Looking back at him, you ask in disbelief, “You got off from eating me out?”

“Yeah.” He smiles dreamily. “Fuckin’ love your pussy. Missed it so much.”

You snort, rubbing your finger down the bridge of his nose. With him so relaxed, he looks like your Joel from twenty years ago, and it makes your heart squeeze over all of the time you missed with him.

What would’ve been different if you’d been together when the world ended? Would Sarah be alive? Would the two of you have still survived all these years?

You let the questions disappear as quickly as they came because there’s no point in pondering them. What happened, happened. You’re just thankful that by some miracle you found him again, that you both are now determined to stick together and live whatever days you have left by each other's sides.

“Aren’t you a romantic.” You trace over his wet lips, which are surprisingly soft.

His hand comes up to grasp yours gently, his practically encompassing yours. Featherlight kisses are pressed to each of your knuckles and, finally, your palm. His eyes blink open, all heavy-lidded to look at you.

“Fuckin’ love you more,” he says softly.

You feel yourself melt under his tender gaze, seeing the truth in the dark depths of his eyes.

“I love you, too.”

“Are you guys done fucking?!” Ellie yells from upstairs.

Joel’s eyes go wide, cheeks turning red, and you can’t help but laugh.

“Give us a minute!” you reply.

“Okay!”

“Don’t look so embarrassed, Joel,” you say to him, tapping the tip of his nose. “It’s not the first time we’ve been caught, and I doubt it’ll be the last.”

He groans, pressing his hands to his face.

His words are muffled, “It’s just as embarrassin’ today as it was twenty fuckin’ years ago.”

“Hey, look on the bright side, babe. Ellie didn’t see anything. Remember how scarred Sarah was that one morning you forgot to lock the door? Thank god we were under the covers, but I thought she’d need therapy.”

“Don’t remind me,” he replies, looking at you again. “Taught her to knock, though.”

“Yeah, it did.”

There’s a lot of groaning as you both get up from the floor, knees not as young as they once were, Joel and you agreeing that maybe you guys should stick to fucking on furniture. After a quick search of the downstairs, you’re able to find a relatively clean towel for Joel to clean up with; you're already dressed. He hollers at Ellie that it’s safe to come down after his shirt is put back on and pants are righted.

She stomps down the stairs like she wants to make sure the two of you know she’s on her way, you and Joel standing by the dining table, passing a bottle of water between each other.

She covers her eyes with one hand when she enters the living room.

Joel huffs out an amused breath, shaking his head as he takes a drink when he sees her.

“There’s zero nudity, Ellie,” you reassure her. “It’s safe to look.”

She uncovers her eyes, “Can’t be too safe,” she says. “Last thing I want is to have to gauge my eyes out because I saw Joel’s old ass.” She makes a disgusted face, and you laugh, Joel snorting.

“What happened to spendin’ the evenin’ readin’ your new book?” Joel asks her.

“Ran out of water,” she answers, holding up her water bottle. “I’m fucking thirsty. Please tell me, one of you has extra.”

“Yes!” you respond, turning to get into your bag and grabbing a container of water. “Here you go, kiddo.”

She’s briskly walking over to take it, unscrewing it right away to take a few big gulps, sighing happily when she finishes.

“Fuck, that’s good,” she says, wiping at her mouth. Ellie looks between you both. “Thought I was gonna be stuck up there all night. So, based on how you were all over each other in the truck and the disgusting noises that I wish I could unhear, I’ll take it, Doc, and you are back together?” she asks Joel.

His ears are bright red, clearing his throat.

“That we are,” he answers, not meeting her eyes.

“Are you fucking blushing?” she teases.

“Ellie,” he grumbles, glaring at her.

“I’m just giving you shit, Joel. Hopefully, she can help pull that stick out of your ass.”

He sighs, and she laughs.

“I’m happy for you, ya big ol’ grump. Doc’s great! I see why you like her, and Jesus, I’m not into sappy romantic bullshit, but you guys have a great fucking story.”

“We really do,” you say, looking at him and finding his eyes are already on you.

“That we do,” he agrees, a soft smile on his lips, leaning in to kiss you.

“Oh, gross.” Ellie sounds disgusted, fake gagging. “I’m going back upstairs. I don’t wanna see this, and I definitely don’t wanna hear anything, so please keep it down. Yuck.” She doesn’t wait for a response, walking away.

You pull apart, looking at Joel.

“We’ve scarred another kid,” you laugh.

“I don’t think, too bad, though,” he chuckles.

“No, not too bad. Now, if she saw your old ass, she’d definitely need therapy.”

He frowns.

“My ass ain’t old.”

“I mean…” you pause, leaning to look behind him at it. “It’s still really nice. Like my god, you could bounce a quarter off it, and the way that I wanna touch it.” You straighten, meeting his eyes. “After you shower and I can get you naked, I am absolutely getting a closer look.”

He smirks, setting the water bottle down on the table, so he can pull you into his arms.

“Yeah?” he asks.

“Oh, yeah.”

His head moves closer, hovering his lips over yours.

“When I can get you naked,” he rasps, “I’m spreadin’ you out on a bed and spendin’ hours between your legs, usin’ all that God gave me to make you come so many times you pass out.”

“Is that a promise?”

“You know it is, baby.” His lips meet yours, kissing the air from your lungs.

Part 1 - Part 3 - Series Masterlist - Masterlist

Thank you for reading! If you'd like to be tagged in my fics, please fill out the form in my bio, on my masterlist, or just let me know!

#pedro pascal #joel miller/reader #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller #tlou fanfiction #joel miller smut #September series #wheresarizona writes

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starkwlkr · 1 year

Note

Oh I love your baby Leclerc works and I have a request like before you jump onto baby no 2, wouldn’t it be amazing to have a one shot of the day ruby was born like how Charles reacted to holding her for the first time. His feelings as a father and a girls dad thinking he has a huge responsibility to live up to his daughter’s expectations. Something like that.

your daddy’s here | charles leclerc

this is so cute 🤍 my knowledge about childbirth is limited but since my sister had a baby in december and i was with her the day before she gave birth i’m just going to use that to write this 🧍🏽‍♀️

January 2019

Y/n and Charles waited for the results. While she was calm, Charles couldn’t contain his excitement. He immediately started picturing them as a family. Him, Y/n and their new baby.

“Okay, do you want to look first or how do you want to do this?” Y/n asked as the timer on her phone went off.

“I want to look together if that’s okay with you.” Charles say next to her on their shared bed. Y/n nodded and flipped the pregnancy test over. She gasped when she saw the words Pregnant’ on the small screen. “We’re going to be parents. Holy shit!” Charles yelled as he immediately hugged the mother of his child and started kissing her face all over.

“Wait, what if our child decides to be born on a race day?” Y/n asked once Charles stopped his kisses.

“I won’t race, simple. I’m going to be there in the hospital with you. You’re crazy if you think I’m going to miss our child’s birth.”

Thank god that didn’t happen.

September 2019

Charles had won in Monza. Y/n wasn’t in attendance since she was days past her due date so she stayed in Monaco with Pascale. They watched the Grand Prix on the tv. Charles even blew a kiss to the camera for his family back home.

Y/n’s doctor had told her the due date was September third, but Baby Leclerc was being stubborn. Yeah, they kept the gender a secret until the birth so everyone referred to their child as baby leclerc. Arthur was the first one to call the baby that name. With the Singapore Grand Prix happening in less than two weeks, Charles was getting nervous.

“Okay, baby leclerc, you have to come out soon.” Charles said to Y/n’s large stomach. He took the opportunity to fly back to Monaco to be with Y/n in case the baby decided to be born.

“They loves hearing your voice. Maybe they’ll listen to their father and come out tonight.” Y/n teased. It was like the baby was listening to her because the next thing she knew, she was in a hospital bed with Charles in a chair beside her.

He had texted all his family members many updates every five minutes. Everyone could tell he was ready and excited to be a dad.

“I’m going insane, Charles, I just want the baby out already.”

A painful and long labor was what it took for baby leclerc to come out. A girl was what the doctor announced to the couple. Charles cut the umbilical cord. He watched as several nurses took the baby girl and placed her on Y/n’s chest. He walked over to his two girls and watched in awe.

“She’s here, she’s actually here.” Charles kissed Y/n’s forehead. “You did so good, mon amour.”

“I think she wants her daddy to hold her.” Y/n smiled even though all she wanted was to rest. She didn’t want to miss the loving moment when Charles finally held his daughter.

“She’s so little. My little girl.” Charles carefully took the baby into his arms. Charles had always heard how first time parents are afraid of holding babies because they think they’re going to drop the baby. But not him, he would never. He held her safely in his arms, smiling down at her. “Hi, baby. I’m your papa.”

Y/n never understood how some adults could look at a baby and say ‘she looks like her father/mother’. It never made sense to her because the baby was just born, how could they find the resemblance? Now she completely understood what they meant. Their daughter looked exactly like Charles. Their nose shape, the mouth, it was all him.

After getting the baby all cleaned, weighed and measured, Charles couldn’t wait to hold his daughter again. The nurse handed the baby girl back to him and congratulated the couple.

“Do you have a name for her?” The nurse asked.

“I have a name, but I wasn’t sure if you’d like it.” He shyly said as he turned his attention to Y/n.

“What is it?”

“Ruby. Like your birthstone.” Charles said.

“Ruby. I love it. Ruby . . . Jules. Ruby Jules.” Y/n confirmed to the nurse.

“I like the name Louise too. Ruby Jules Louise Leclerc.” Charles added. The nurse nodded and excused herself. “Ruby Jules.” He said once more. He loved how it sounded.

“I know you wanted to make at least one of our kids after Jules.” Y/n kissed Charles’ cheek.

“We’re going to have more?” Charles chuckled. “With you I’ll have all the babies you want. We can give Ruby Jules all the siblings.”

“Some, not all. You try popping out a kid.”

Liked by lorenzotl, pierregasly and 107,638 others

charles_leclerc Baby Leclerc ❤️

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Liked by estebanocon, scuderiaferrari and 102,678 others

y/nleclerc proud mama to my special girl ✨🫶🏼

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#formula 1 #formula 1 imagine #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 x you #charles leclerc #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc one shot #cl16 x reader #ferrari

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multifandomfanficss · 7 months

Text

Home Is Wherever You Are P6

Adrian Chase/Vigilante x Reader

With a very heavy emphasis on platonic!Christopher Smith/Peacemaker

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 7

Adrian Chase Masterlist

Prompt: When the device fails, you and Adrian go to a friend for help.

Warnings: mentions of August Smith, cannon typical Peacemaker violence and language, homophobia

A/N: Sorry I skipped a week! It was a very intense and demanding week. I was actually getting lifeguard certified! Thank you guys for all of your support on this story. Enjoy!

“What the fuck do you mean he left?!” Harcourt yelled. She wanted you back just as badly as everyone else, but as the team leader she had to make the hard choices and she couldn’t afford to lose anyone else because of this mission.

“He’ll get there. He’ll find them and he’ll find a way back.” Economos sounds optimistic for once in his life.

“Since when have you become so optimistic?” She asks.

“I can be surprising!” John huffs.

September 13th, 1994

You wake up to an empty bed. It all must have been some fucked up dream. You had to get Gut and Chris out the door for school. Adrian should already be there. Diane would have driven him into his first day this morning. Your eyes blur with fresh tears about to drop as you rise from bed. Your vision clogged by tears, so you don’t see Adrian’s suit peaking out from under the bed. You trip over one oh his shin guards and hit the floor. You hear footsteps race up the stairs.

“Are you okay?” Adrian busts open the door.

“Yeah I’m fi- what are you wearing?” You look up to find your boyfriend in one of Diane’s old baking aprons.

“My mom’s apron.” He says as if that’s obvious.

“I mean why are you wearing it?” You question, as you start to stand up.

“Why? It’s because it’s floral and lacy and technically for a woman isn’t it? I didn’t think you’d been in the 90’s that long, but-“

“No, you can wear it, but like were you cooking…or…” You trail off.

“Sorry. I just spent too much time with teenage Chris.” He sighs

“He saw you?”

“Yeah and he kept calling me voice message guy. I don’t even know what that means.” He looks at you in confusion.

“Don’t worry about it! You know Chris! Always a dick!” You blush, trying to change the subject.

“He’s more of a dick than I remember. I made him breakfast and I didn’t even get a thank you! He just called me Nancy and left with Gut for school! That’s not even my name!” You pull him into your embrace.

“Baby, he’s calling you gay.”

“Okay? He’s not wrong. I am queer. I don’t just like girls. He’s queer too. What’s the point in bringing it up at breakfast?” Adrian questions.

“Well, I don’t think he’s fully come to terms with or maybe even realized that yet. He’s still technically living with his dad and it’s the 90’s. Everything is gay in a weird way. I know it sucks, but we have to allow time to breathe and change. We’re the ones out of our time here. We can go beat up homophobes and not mess up the timeline in our own time.” You kiss him. The 90’s are a shock to him since he doesn’t remember them very well. They were a shock to you too, but he’s just been thrown into it. You had over a week to adjust. It’s not pretty. Discrimination never is, but when you know better times are coming, you can’t do anything that could risk your better future. Home isn’t perfect, but it’s a little better than this. Fighting homophobia now would be like traveling back in time to fight segregation or women’s rights. It’s such a big fixed point in time that if you mess with it, you could change everything and you have no guarantee it would be for the better. People always talk about time travel like it’ll be wonderful. They never stop and think about all the awful responsibility that comes with it or how it affects your morality. “And before you get the idea no, you’re not killing his dad.”

“Why not?” Adrian asks.

“Because if you kill him that would affect history too much. We have no idea what that could do to Chris. We may never stop the butterflies or any other major threat in the future because maybe Chris didn’t become a hero or maybe he followed in his dad’s footsteps while mourning. Peacemaker as we know him would probably cease to exist. Do you know how many people he’s saved? They could all be dead. Emilia could be dead. That could start a whole different chain reaction. I wish we could kill Chris’ dad now, but who knows what kind of chaos that would cause to the timeline. We could completely break it.” You remind him.

“You’re right. Let’s just get out of here before we fuck anything else up.” He digs around in his pocket for the time travel grenades.

“Were those just in your pocket?” You ask.

“Yeah. I’m not an idiot (Y/N). I wasn’t gonna let them get lost or stolen.” He hands you one.

“Why does mine have a light on it?” You ask.

“It’s supposed to.” He informs you.

“Then why doesn’t yours have one?” You ask.

“Oh fuck! I thought I heard a crack when I sat on it earlier, but I was really hoping it was just the chair.” Your jaw drops to the floor as he gives you one of his famous Adrian Chase ‘I fucked up’ faces.

“Does that mean we’re stuck here?” You ask. He grabs his suit and starts going through all the pockets.

“It’s gonna be fine because Adebayo gave me a piece of paper with the address for the old ARGUS headquarters. They’re gonna help us which means under no circumstances do we need to freak out.” He reassures you.

“Oh shit! Adrian!”

“What?”

“No, not you. I’m sorry. Well, sort of you, but little you…I have to pick him up from preschool later. He has a half day today. I forgot. If I don’t do it nobody will.” You remind your boyfriend.

“What if we go, figure out a plan, pick up little me and go back later if need be. We need what? A battery? It can’t take that long.” Adrian suggests.

“Okay. You’re right we’ll probably be fine. You agree and head off to the address.

When you arrive there you find a little girl sitting on a bench doing homework. She’s all by herself outside of ARGUS headquarters.

“Shouldn’t you be in school?” You ask her.

“I’m homeschooled. My mommy says traveling with her is a better education.” She smiles, kicking her feet, filling in the next math problem.

“So you travel a lot?” You ask her. She nods.

“Where have you been?” Adrian asks her.

“I’ve been all over North America, most of Europe, and a ton of places in South America, but my mommy goes all over the world for work.” She tells you. You get a better look at her homework to see she’s doing math at a level that you assumed she was years away from. She looked like she was doing basic middle school math, but couldn’t be more than 7 or 8.

“Is that math hard?” You asked.

“Not really. It’s kinda boring though.” She shrugs.

“Woah! Looks like we have a little artist in our presence!” Adrian points at a dog she’d drawn in the corner of the page.

“I love dogs and I’m really good at drawing them! One day I’m gonna have so many!” She beams.

“Leota!” You hear her name being called from the doorway of the old ARGUS headquarters.

“You guys seem really nice maybe we can go exploring sometime together!” She says before running off.

Suddenly everything makes sense. Both you and Adrian proceed to laugh.

“Everyday this feels more and more like a fever dream.” You say, walking inside.

As soon as you walk in you start looking for any excuse to be there. Looking at the front desk person only ten steps away you didn’t plan this very well.

“Why did we think coming in here with no plan was a good idea?” Adrian asks you.

“It was your idea!” You remind him.

“You followed it!” He argues.

“It’ll be fine just think think think think think…” Your eyes scan the mailboxes in the entry way until you see one you recognize. No fucking way.

You pull Adrian up to the front desk.

“Who are you here to see?” They ask.

“We’re here to see John Economos.” You smile.

“And who should I say is here?” They ask.

“Some old friends and colleagues.”

The front desk person gives you a key card which will only let you take the elevator to John’s floor and gives you instructions on how to get there. When you arrive he isn’t ecstatic to see you, but that’s fair. He doesn’t even know you yet.

“You’re not my mom bringing my lunch.” He groans. John may only be 27, but his attitude is still the same.

“No, we’re not, but we need your help.” You start.

“Why should I help you?” He asks.

“Why shouldn’t you help us?” Adrian retorts.

“There are literally so many reasons. I’m not losing my job over this.”

“Trust me. You won’t.” Adrian laughs loudly over a joke that would go over John’s head.

“We have to tell him the truth.” You tell Adrian.

“What truth? I don’t even know you people.” John says.

“I thought you said nobody can know…”

“Well we kinda have to tell him about the time travel device in order for him to be able to fix it.” You remind him.

“So let me get this straight. You two nutcases think you’re time travelers?” John laughs.

“I can prove it! We’re friends and you have to believe me because I know you have an 11th Street Kids tattoo on your arm that you got at a Hanoi Rocks concert in Finland when you were 14!” You tell him.

“That’s not the most difficult thing to find out about me. It’s literally written on my skin.” He rolls his eyes.

“Well here’s a picture of us in the van and here’s a picture of you feeding Eagly. I actually took that one while you weren’t looking because you get annoyed when I say you like him. Here’s a pic-“

“That’s enough, Adrian!” You push his hands down, hiding his phone from John’s view.

“You’re the one who said we could tell him!” Adrian says, getting frustrated.

“You’re right. I’m sorry. I’m just worried about him learning too much about the future.”

“So what? I’m supposed to believe you because you just because you taught yourself the new Adobe Photoshop 3.0 to get ahead on your job resume? And then stuck it on what?…a digital frame?” John is annoyingly skeltical, but it is still his first year at ARGUS. He hasn’t seen everything his older self has yet. You sigh.

“Catch.” You toss him the broken device. “If you can fix this and send us home I promise we’ll be out of your hair for the next 28 years.”

“So who’s the idiot who broke it” Economos asks, looking it over.

“It’s not broken broken though, right? Can’t you just like recharge it?” You ask.

“Dude the power source is crushed. What did you do; sit on it?” John questions.

“…No” Adrian lies, poorly concealed behind an exaggerated expression.

“Can you fix it?” You’re hopeful.

“No, I can’t fix it. What do I look like? George Jetson? This is some weird power source that I’m pretty sure doesn’t even exist yet.” John says in his classic pessimistic tone. Good to think some things never change.

“Well then how do you know it’s the power source?” Adrian challenges him.

“There’s an on/off button” John says, bluntly.

“We’re never getting home…” You sigh. Adrian picks up your hand as a gentle reminder everything would be okay. It was something you two often did when he saw you becoming a bit anxious and you needed something to anchor yourself. At least you had him back.

“Well I might not be able to fix it, but I could probably amplify the field of one device to be able to take two people, but it would take a little bit of time.”

“How long is a little bit? I have to pick up the kid I nanny from preschool.” You ask Economos, concerned about Adrian’s younger self.

“Oh no! You can’t just dip on me. I’m not putting my job at any further risk for a 3 year old.”

“Well that 3 year old grows up to be 30 and meets you and then proceeds saves your life more than once, so I’d rethink that. Without that 3 year old most of us would probably be dead.” You defend Adrian.

Your adult boyfriend proudly smiles and waves at your younger friend.

“Gross! You’re nannying your fucking boyfriend?!” Economos is appalled.

“I didn’t have a lot of choices, okay!” You defend yourself.

“Yeah, tell that to Freud!” Economos laughs at his own joke.

“We’re not going back in time again. We’re trying to go forward in time.” Adrian missed John’s joke, but to be fair his tone has apparently never in his life been easy to read.

“He’s using a figure of speech, babe.” You smile, squeezing his hand. “I have to go pick up his younger self at preschool. Are you gonna help us or not?” You ask.

“Come back by tonight and I should have this all figured out. Let’s just hope for everyone’s sake, my theory works.”

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darksxder · 1 year

Text

rush it

pairing: frat boy! chad meeks-martin x fem! bff! reader

summary: you only rushed a sorority for chad’s sake, but you can’t imagine regretting it after the game of capture you get to play one fall night

warnings/tags: requited unrequited love, bittersweet (alleged by tae), skimpy bunny costume, angst and tension filled fluff, friends to lovers, deserves a second part honestly

word count: 2.1k

a.n. : I think this was subconsciously inspired by @ethansluvbot’s pfp of regina george in her bunny costume, so thank you fr!

sdt: @belle82devart

dt’s: @ethansluvbot , @midnightaemond & @spiderlover03

If someone had told you that you would be where you are right now, maybe a year ago-hell a few months ago, you would’ve laughed in their face. Might have even flushed pink when they detailed your outfit. The fact you were dressed like a bunny, or perhaps the Kappa Deta Pi’s version of a bunny that mostly resembled Regina George’s costume rendition at Halloween.

And you were just about as skittish as an actual bunny as the fluffy white pom-pom attached to your ass rustled in the grass. Currently, you were crouched behind a bush, heart nearly beating out of your fucking chest as you heard the hoots and hollers of the various boys around.

You weren’t the only bunny.

There were plenty of girls hiding around campus or dashing across the trails and parking lots of Blackmore University dressed as bunnies. But every man on campus, or at least everyone trying to get into a frat was a fox. Mind you they just had orange paint stripes over their bare chests, no confection or ball of fur needed to be attached to their ass.

Which only infuriated you on account of feminism and not because you had a bad habit of looking away whenever someone was shirtless. Totally. It made keeping watch difficult. And every five seconds your eyes went blurry with the glitter Tara forced into your eyes inner corner. A thick, pure dazzling white she poked there with her finger after she lined your eyes with dark brown gel eyeliner. Then go so far as to add a pretty bright pink blush to your nose and cheeks, and spread a clear gloss to your lips.

Just that and then you were off, out of the sorority, sprinting across the Blackmore University campus, and running for your furry little life. Immediately feeling your quite exposed ass cheeks freeze in the biting fall wind.

You were just thankful you could keep your knee-high boots, as they were heeled yes, but black leather, thus very warm. They even covered the majority of your stocking-clad legs. The large bunny ears glued right into the headband snug on your head were so tight it was giving you a migraine, especially when you had to double back for them twice because you ran too fast against the early September wind.

You had two hot pink flags on each side of your hip, and no one had touched yours yet. you were free.

You wanted to say you weren’t trying hard or you never usually took these types of childish games seriously but it would be a lie. You take EVERYTHING seriously and your heart is racing so fast on account of the fact you’ve fallen into that cloying and tempting trap of pretending it was real. Like you were truly being hunted like you might die, and it wasn’t too far-fetched with the masked murderer going around NYC. But you tried not to think of that. To think of anything else as you finally saw him.

Chad.

He was nearly gasping as he slowed from his dead sprint, his tanned and built chest rising and falling harshly. The tilted orange stripes were dull when you first saw them on his brown skin, but now they proved stunning in the moonlight. You allowed one glance, a second to note the soft light casting deep shadows across his muscled abdomen, leading your eyes to his sharp v-line dipping past the hem of his dark blue jeans. The sight was past your eye line but not your mind. And sweat was running in perfect droplets down his chest, the veins in his hands prominent as he clenched them, as his eyes darted from tree to bush to tree and bush. Looking for you.

Your heart pounded harder as he stopped dead still, right in front of your bush. A good twenty feet away. But he made you. Thinking of options you noted you could run, but something told you it wouldn’t do you much good.

But if there was one thing that you loved more than escapism through these types of games, it was fucking winning these types of things. So with your hands sliding down your hips, you checked to see if your flags were still there. And with a soft touch, you picked up a rock and chucked it into the bush across from you and watched as his head swerved towards it. As soon as his attention left you, and you no longer felt that hot iron brand to the side of your face, you dashed.

Some might say running in heels was difficult, especially in the platforms you were in that almost made you taller than Chad. They are correct, as you find it is indeed difficult. Especially on grass.

In a mere second, you hear this man catch up to you, your tired heart jumping at the thundering footsteps quickly echoing yours. With one of his strides, being three of yours, truly damning your advantage of being a past track star.

And when thickly muscled arms wrapped around your waist and pull you up like it’s nothing, you scream. Even though you know it’s Chad. Because he wears the same cologne and you saw him spot you. But mostly because he picks you up like it’s nothing always, no matter how many times you say you’re ‘too heavy’ for him to do so. It was the way he was gentle and firm, not yanking you into the air. Instead, it felt like he was helping you there almost.

But the fact his warm sweaty arms were around your bustier-clad middle had your pulse racing as fast as a rabbit's run.

“Gotcha'” he purred near your ear, laughing as he heard you squeak.

“Chad, put me down!” you lament, voice tired, obviously disappointed too. You had been so fucking close to winning. Hadn't seen another bunny in hours. But you just heard him hum out a 'no'.

His hand is now on the back of your plush thighs, your tits pressed firmly against one side of his back, painfully smothered against the strapless push-up set, the underwire digging into your sensitive flesh.

“Chad my boobs will fall out!” you squealed, face beet red, fists pounding sadly at his spine. To no avail. He didn’t even so much as flinch and you knew it was because you never actually hit him hard, you couldn’t even imagine it.

“Sounds like a good time for me. Wanna switch sides so I get a good view?” he asked, voice deep and teasing. But the smug drawl was cut off as the lip of your boot slammed into his bare ribs. And you were laughing into the starry night sky as he huffed out a harsh breath, gripping your thighs higher, almost fully folding over.

“Can’t hurt a man for trying, or I would’ve said that eventually if you didn’t quickly prove that you would indeed hurt a man for trying.” He rasped, voice fake pained. Back in the teasing sing-song tone that made your eye twitch.

Then he ripped the flags off your hips, pausing for a second as if to soothe the area there, hand firm and warm against your cold rear, your face flushing at the soft caress. And you just gave up. Honestly, truly, gave up, as he carried you across the vast freshly cut fields and through twisting trails, hell half the quad as other partygoers watched and laughed at the sight. But it wasn’t mean-spirited like you expected, it was almost camaraderie, but you still felt a bit like a child in time out. Helped by your huffing as you rubbed at the glitter in your eyes, sick of the burning it caused you. Hating the pain in your spine from the slumped-over posture. But as Chad reached his dorm and dashed up the stairs, to the very obvious approval of his frat mates, if their whoops and smirks were any consolation, you stopped whining about it.

Just taking the bouncing of your tits and head against his back in stride. Soft and feverish cheek smushed to his shoulder blade, just focusing on the ground beneath you, tracing the tattoos you could reach on his back. It’s almost an unconscious action if you could ever touch him and not be fully aware of it. But you couldn’t.

You had been in love with him for years, and although he was an affectionate person, his touch never ceased to give you jitters. No matter how many years passed, it had been thirteen. It never failed to make your stomach flip so quickly and suddenly you’d think you were on a rollercoaster that just dropped 3 stories in height.

“So, are you planning on skinning and eating me?” You muse, one hand propping up your cheek, elbow purposefully digging into his muscled shoulder hard. He laughed a beautiful sound that had your cold thighs squeezing together.

“If that means I get to see you naked, then yeah.”

“Chad!” You yell, going to kick out at him again before he flipped you back over to his chest, cradling you like one might a bride, your boobs pressed harshly against the side of his chest, nearly spilling out of the small cups.

“Okay, so you caught me..” you roll your eyes hard, trying to play along, knowing he wouldn’t drop it without your playing it up. “Whatever will you do with me now, Mr. Fox?”

He snorted, hoisting your ass under one arm and fiddling with his dorm keys in the other, his own heart skipping at your gasp at the action, your soft and perfect arms thrown casually around his neck in a vice grip.

“I understand why they took away your barking privileges when you played Nana in Peter Pan that one year. Your acting sucks.” he laughs, smiling down at your scowling self, trying desperately to take you seriously with the soft white bunny ears on your head. But it was difficult, what with them being all fluffy and big, with a hot pink center, the right one folded over slightly for optimal effect.

“Whatever. I wanna go home and shower, Chad. Been running from sweaty dudes all night.” Your eyes fall to the carpeted floor, now actually glad he was carrying you, not wanting to get your nice leather boots sticky with whatever marred the boy's dorm carpet. You could only imagine. And instead of taking the bait to tease you, flirty personality stroked, he went quiet.

“You are home,” he said, voice soft, no ounce of teasing there and your gaze shot to him. And you felt yourself swallow hard, blinking back tears you would have sworn came from the glitter.

“Is this your not-so-subtle way of asking me to stay over?” You tease, heart, pounding a mile a minute, feeling sweat trickle down your neck, sticking your hair to your shoulders as you tilted your head up at him, curious and waiting. Soft and sure, gentle. No judgment there. From the warmth in his eyes, he knew that.

“Yes. And figured I earned it since I caught you. Plus you’ve been working too hard lately. You need rest.”

The tears fall now as his words swallow you whole, making that tension building for weeks, bunched in your shoulders subside. You could only sniffle and nod, understanding the truth in his words. The reality. You had been running yourself into the ground with club applications, sorority pledges and rush, all of it too much.

“You’re right. Just this once,” you nodded slowly and sincerely, “I’m surprised too.”

Chad rolled his eyes so hard that you laughed through your tears. “Okay. Am I sharing your bed, or camping out on the floor? Or is your roomie home, the cute one?”

He scoffed, hand pressed to his bare striped chest in mock offence. “I am the cute one, not Ethan Landry.” he bit, pushing open the door and stepping inside over the frame with you still in his arms. It felt a little like you had just been married, but you dashed that thought down before it could truly take hold.

“Sure. whatever you wanna believe..” you coo, eyes narrowed in mockery.

He just shook his head, glancing up at the clock on the far wall. “He’ll be gone 'till two am. Can get out a movie, shower and get to bed before then, huh?”

Nodding, you flushed deeply as he handed you a basket he kept on his desk. Eyes widened as you took in its contents. It had your glasses container (your spare), contacts, tampons, pads, Burt’s Bees chapstick (wild cherry) and your favourite makeup wipes. You smiled wide at him.

“This is giving relationship.. like you really like your bestie.”

He shook his head quickly, cheeks heating under your teasing tone. “No.”

“Ehhh I don’t know, this is giving no commitment issues actually. it’s giving I want you in my dorm and life so much, I made a special box of your stuff for you.”

“It’s giving all that?” he mocked, glancing at the tiny basket cradled in your lap, but you just nodded firmly, lips pursed in surety.

“We’ll then maybe it’s accurate…” he whispered, breath soft.

And you felt like you had been punched, mouth agape in shock for a mere moment before you pulled it together as your head spun. “Then let me shower before this glitter makes me fully blind.” You groan, throwing in the last bit because you know he’d give his ever so clever and original ‘you’re already kinda blind’ without it.

And you hate that you loved him for it. Hate that you loved him period. Hate that you wanted him so much it ached, that it made tears spring to your eyes when you thought of it at home in your dorm.

Knowing that after your shower in his bathroom, you would steal his shirt and boxers and crawl into his twin-size bed, the laptop screen lighting up the room as he pulled you in closer by the waist, his face half in the bend of your neck and half watching the screen. Bare chest pressed against his oversized shirt he lent you. It made you so excited you might actually scream. But you knew from the many past experiences so similar to this one, that it was hard to fall asleep like that. When you were surrounded in sheets that smelled like him, generally surrounded by him, with his bare arms around you. In those moments it was hard to deny you wanted him. And you needed to because he was your best friend.

Nothing more.

#chad meeks martin #chad Meeks Martin fic #Chad Meeks-Martin fanfiction #scream chad #scream chad meeks-martin #chad meeks-martin x fem!reader #scream 5 fic #scream 6 fic

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iconocon · 2 years

Text

permission | gasly

summary: "I don't need your permission"

warnings: none really just a lot of angst

type: oneshot | word count: 1.8k | ⚔︎ ANGST

→

you were pacing around your boyfriend's apartment that you just freshly decorated to try to put him in the christmas spirit as you knew he was just getting off the tail-end of another stressful season of formula 1. it was another season where he was dealt a bad deck of cards where the lows always seemed to outrank themselves against the highs. you knew trying to make things work in any relationship took an enormous amount of dedication but yours especially understood the stress of a long-distance relationship because while he was off jet-setting around the globe driving the fastest cars in the world, you were left here in milan finishing what little you had left of school. some days it felt like you were living in parallel universes constantly pushing the two of you apart. you hated the way the situation sounded, to an outsider it made you sound like a housewife waiting for her man to return to give her some sense of purpose for living. that was never what you wanted for yourself or signed up for in meeting pierre but somehow along the way, he worked his way with all that charm into all your doubts making them not seem so big anymore.

the love story you shared was nothing to write books about as you met him through instagram and of course, you've seen the memes so you knew what he was like on the app so you didn't entirely think much of the multiple 'liked by pierre gasly' notifications that popped up after a shared friend posted a story of you. which then started a beautiful friendship that grew into what it was now, making it just about a year spent together. one thing that was becoming increasingly more obvious was that pierre was not a future guy; he drifted away from the marriage conversations or the "let's get a dog together to keep you company" talks that happened usually by now in most relationships like yours. like most young attractive men in his field, he enjoyed what the lifestyle gave him, enjoying living in the moments that he was granted big or small. no matter how hard it was for you to admit it the cracks were starting to show both now drifting from the love-struck puppies you once were.

the last time you saw him in person was september when you had visited him for the italian grand prix which I guess if you thought about it now was when you started noticing the difference in him. after an outstanding 6th place qualifying you both celebrated the nights as most couples would with a beautiful candlelight dinner where he told you how beautiful you were leaving you to blush and tell him that he would always be the champion in your heart no matter where he was on some grid in some stupid country. by the end of the night you were both practically skipping back to the hotel where he whispered sweet nothings about how he would show you how a champion made love. which he did, keeping his promise multiple times.

it never lasted though, that all came crashing down though as most things do. during the qualifying for the sprint race, he made contact with daniel which lead to damage to the car making him retire from the race. then the bad luck followed him to the actual race which lead to a double DNF for the team only adding to his bad mood for the weekend. if pierre was one thing it was it was a sulker. he was a horrible loser in everything, a stupid iphone game, a game of COD between him a charles, anything that involved competition he needed to win but if he didn't you would get reminded of it for days. every day for the rest of the italy trip you would try to get him to go do things with you just to leave the hotel room or the alpha tauri meetings just for one day and every day he would kiss you on the head only to say he would text you on his way home but to not wait up.

before you knew it you were back in milan and he was off to sochi which was just as unkind to him. between then and now you both tried talking as much as possible but seeing each other through phone/computer screens was never a romantic gesture. waiting upon ungodly hours just to tell him how proud you were of him even when it was a bad result without a returned text only could make you wanna try so hard. you just wanted your lighthearted french man from the summer back.

⏤

"be home at 5. ill call a taxi you don't have to come to get me."

you were more confused than ever at the coldness of the text especially with your blue text right above it telling him how excited you were to see him and all these things you had planned for the both of you.

another hour ticked by as you waited on his couch staring at the tiny white-hued christmas lights wrapped in garland you hung around the fireplace for him. thus being the only thing warming up the room as you scrolled aimlessly through the different social media apps, anything to distract you from the time ticking past. the sound of the door creaking open ultimately snapping you out of your daze as you jump up to meet your bundled up boyfriend in the hallway.

"baby, wait let me help you." you automatically reached out for his rolling suitcase as his other hand was quite literally barely hanging onto the bag/water bottle combo he had.

"no it's fine i got it" pushing through the door you shake your head at the monotone voice paired with the unimpressed stare he was giving you. it took everything in you not to just plop on the wooden floor sitting there in the middle of the hallway directly in way of the rest of the house throwing a temper tantrum until he told you everything on his mind but knowing entirely how selfish that was you pushed it to the back of your mind to follow behind him into the rest of the room.

"so, how was your flight?" you sounded awkward you know you did before it even reached your ears, you too probably even looked awkward as you leaned against the marble countertops staring at the string of your purple hoodie instead of looking at him because you knew if you did you would only get more worked up by his gaze.

"long." the short answers were an even worse form of torture than not talking to you at all. you'd rather sit completely in silence than know he chose to only say a word to you after months of being apart. once again you nodded your head feeling like a dumb puppy obeying their master as you made your way back to your place on the couch hoping that in time he would warm up out of this grumpy pit he was in.

⏤

as you sat and stewed in your own self-pity you listened as pierre put his bag away, took a shower, and even ate some of the dinners you made for the both of you all while not even saying a word to you. as each minute passed you felt your leg start getting more jittery you were even sure you had no fingernails left as you chewed them all off.

"do you know where my blue sweater is?" head snapping to his wet-haired figure in the hallway you could feel the furrow in your own eyebrow as you answered him back, "your going out shirt? should be in the top drawer where you left it."

why would he need that shirt? you knew that shirt like the back of your hand after all it was the one he met you for the first time. it all was building up in you and you knew soon you wouldn't be able to continue playing this never-ending game with him. just as you were mustering up the courage to say something- anything to him he appears all dressed up jeans, your sweater, your favorite cologne, all the things you loved about him were staring you right in the face and if you were dumb enough you would think he did it for you but if there was anything you weren't it was dumb. you knew better.

"where are you going?

"I'm going out." the audacity that he had almost took your breath away as he just kept putting his shoes on but with all that audacity he had, he still couldn't find it to look you in the eyes. you were sure if you looked at yourself in the mirror there would be steam coming out of your ears as you felt months of animosity bubble up inside you. "and where is out pierre? it's been months since we've seen each other and you don't even care. why don't you care?" the way you sounded almost made you pity yourself you hated sounding like you were begging him to even care about you like you were right now.

"charles is in town and asked to meet up its not that big of a deal."

"CHARLES?" finally raising yourself from the couch you all but stomp towards him. "you're telling me you got all dressed up for charles? someone who you have spent months with?" the fact that he didn't try to calm you down or console you made you even more erratic. watching as he reaches out for his keys on the hook you grab them out of his fingertips holding them close to your chest. "no, you're not leaving until you talk to me."

the laugh that came out of him was completely malicious like he was actually enjoying this fight you were having. it was not at all the same sound that had occupied your brain for a year, the same sound that made you fall in love with the french driver.

"i don't need your permission." it was almost like you could see him think of the next words that came out of his mouth before he said them like he himself was building up the courage to say them yet you almost begged them not to come out but, they still came out anyway. "i don't need this anymore." you didn't need clarification on what "this" was.

all the air left your lungs as those words reached your ears, you couldn't believe what you were hearing. a year. you gave a year to this stranger in front of you even if it didn't sound like your pierre it sure looked and if you reached out you knew it felt like him too. it was enough to break your heart but you were sure the sound of his keys hitting the floor was almost just as loud as the sob that fell through your lips.

⏤

i keep writing oneshots, like i have 10 drafts but no ideas for enigma/fanfics i forgot how much writing sucks + sorry for any mistakes i didnt double check this yet

#📗#pierre gasly x reader #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 one shot #f1 drabble #formula one imagine #angst #formula one x reader #pierre gasly x you

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valyalyon · 2 months

Text

September, 2024

CW: Descriptive sexual content, cheating, affair.

September 9, 2024.

Since our fight on what would have been our 6 year anniversary, Julius and I had kept our distance within the house. I continued helping with Anthony and caring for Theo but we hardly spoke.

On that afternoon though, I saw Sara leave the house with a man, and when I looked out my window, I saw them making out in his car. Despite how much Sara was always away, I had tried to believe that she was loyal to Julius but that day my mind was changed entirely.

The boys were asleep, so I texted Julius to come to the dining room. He showed up after a few minutes and I invited him to sit down.

“I don’t know how to say this, but Sara left with a man earlier, and I saw her making out in the car with him,” I wanted him to know so that he wouldn’t be in the dark.

“Sara started sleeping around months ago when she started going out all the time. We don’t share a bed ever, and we haven’t had sex with each other since before she started cheating on me,” he shrugged it off and looked me in the eye, “I haven’t been happy with her pretty much since I married her.”

“Why?” I asked, confused.

“Well, because she isn’t you, and we had something no one else had. I can’t just pretend to have that with someone else,” the way he looked at me made my heart race in my chest.

“This isn’t right, you know,” I told him, and stood up from the table, unsure of if I’d walk away or not.

He stood up too, and looked at me, “get on the table and spread your legs for me.”

I did as he asked, I don’t know why. Actually, I thought it was only fair since Sara wasn’t faithful either. A part of me remembered all the amazing sex we always had, and I thought if he wasn’t getting it from his wife he was bound to look for it somewhere else. I didn’t want him getting it from anyone but me.

He fucked me so hard on that table that I thought we’d break it.

September 18, 2024.

I was wiping down the kitchen counter. Julius and Sara had come back from work, Sara had gone upstairs to shower, and Julius lingered in the living room taking his work boots off.

I heard Sara close the bathroom door, and then I saw Julius getting up off the couch barefoot, coming towards me in the kitchen.

He came up behind me and pulled my ass up to his crotch, rubbing against me. I moaned, but protested, “we don’t have enough time…”

“Never knew you were worried about being caught,” Julius said, pulling my panties down from underneath my night gown. He took his dick out of his work pants and he was already rock hard. His 9 throbbing inches slipped into me with a lot of spit.

“I’m serious, we don’t have time,” I whimpered, trying to push him away but failing miserably.

“I’ll be fast, just have your mouth and throat ready.” He told me.

Sure enough after 8 minutes he had made me cum once, and was pulling out, turning me to kneel in front of him. I opened my mouth as he slipped his cock into it, and I began sucking it until he came, just a couple seconds later.

As he came, he held me by the back of the head, pushing me to swallow more of his dick as he finished in my mouth.

He tapped his dick on my tongue after pulling out, squeezing loose the last bits of cum into my mouth. I pulled my panties up and he slipped his dick back in his pants, just as Sara came down the stairs.

“Well, Dolly, I’m going now, the bar is calling,” she smiled at me, saw Julius, and smiled at him, “you try not to be rude to Dolores.”

September 30, 2024.

Julius helped me file for divorce from Harvey, taking me around the city to get paperwork and spending an obscenely long time with me stuck in waiting rooms.

After it was all filed it was after 6pm and Julius decided to take me to a motel for us to spend the night together. I wasn’t exactly sure where the idea had come from, but needing a little break, I agreed to it.

When we got into the room, Julius and I began to make out and I was quickly on my knees for him while he sat on the edge of the bed. He held my hair with one hand, and with the other answered his phone as it began to ring.

“Hey, sorry, I don’t think it’s safe to drive home. It’s raining pretty hard in this part of town and a lot of the streets are flooded,” he said this while moving my head along his throbbing cock.

I tried not to make too many sounds, but as I heard him I realized he was talking to Sara. My brain started to spin. It wasn’t flooding where they were, there was just a bit of rain.

This is going to sound stupid, but in that moment it began to settle in for me that I was just a lie. I was a secret he was keeping, a game he was having fun playing. I knew I didn’t want to be that for him, but I couldn’t stop what was happening in that moment.

No matter what, I always seemed to be craving him, so I put aside my worries, and decided I’d deal with it in the morning.

Note From Valya

Hope you enjoyed the sexual scenes between Dolores and Julius! Always remember to engage with the content/send me questions or requests! See below for more of Dreams, Ink and Embers.

DIE MASTER LIST OR #LYONDIE

#writeblr #creative writing #dark romance #writers of tumblr #writing #literature #booklr #writers on tumblr #smut #original story #LYONDIE #BLUESTLYON #spicy books

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gracie7209 · 10 months

Text

Amaryllis - Chapter One

Pairing: frankie x f!reader

WC: 1k+

Warnings: alcohol mention, drunk Tom comes with his own warning, unwanted advances, but nothing crazy, implied unwanted/forced(but-not-really) sexual activity. Please met me know if there was anything I missed.

Summary: You learn that life is about to drastically change for you. Thinking back, you reflect on a moment that you never could have guessed would put you in your current situation, or how it will affect you moving forward.

A/N: I suck at summaries Just going to throw this out there and move on lol As always, I appreciate any and all feedback, reblogs etc, just be kind ❤️

Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist

Fall is always an interesting time of year….. The leaves are changing, the air is getting cooler, Pumpkin Spice is the essential flavor of choice basically from September 1st through Black Friday and beyond…

Each season brings with it its own changes. Some good, some not so good, but predictable for the most part. Changes in temperature, the weather, summer activities and different holidays. Expected.

What you hadn’t expected in this particular season of your life, was to be looking down at a little pink + sign on a little white stick you had purchased at the grocery store. The emalgome of emotions that you feel can’t be described by just any one word. Your thoughts are racing—

How did this happen? He’s usually so careful…. Tom has never wanted kids—

—running over and over again, until you stop. Instead, images start flooding your mind. Still holding the little stick in your hand, you think back to one night, of which you’re sure resulted in your current situation.

It happened to be fight night, which meant that Tom would be out late with the guys.

Tom.

Tom was your husband of almost seven years. On certain fridays, Tom would go with Pope and Will to watch Will’s little brother Benny get knocked around as he tried to build a name for himself as an MMA fighter. He was actually pretty good from what little you’ve been told about him, though you’ve never gone to one of the fights yourself. Tom would overindulge, getting so shitfaced that he usually needed one of the guys to drive him home.

That Friday was no different.

—

You had been going about your normal routine and were just getting ready to head to bed, when you saw headlights pull into the driveway.

You hadn’t expected Tom to be back for at least another hour or two since the guys usually took to the bar shortly after the fights ended. You went to open the door and were met with a truck you didn’t recognize.

The driver also wasn’t Will or Pope, but you saw Tom in the passenger seat so whoever it was, had just been bringing him home. Stepping out of the truck, Tom was wobbly and immediately made his way over to you.

“There she is! Hey Fish, I wanna introduce you to somebody!” Tom was to you now and had his hands on your upper arms, pulling you in for a hug. The other man stepped out of the truck and made his way over.

“You haven’t met my wife yet, have ya Fish? Just look at her man!”

Tom was a very jealous, very possessive man in general, and rarely introduced you to new people. But on occasion, especially if he was drinking, he would gush about how beautiful you were. The problem was that he always did it in a this is mine sort of way that wasn’t flattering or even sweet.

Fish, as Tom called him, walked over and seemed almost shy at first, introducing himself as Frankie.

Eventually, you would learn that they were in the military together and that ‘Fish’ was his call sign just like Tom’s was ‘Redfly.’

Frankie was tall, but not quite as tall as Tom. Dark hair from what you could see under his hat that was just long enough that it curled around the edges. Broad shoulders and hands that felt rough, but were warm when he shook your hand. His beard was patchy, but it suited him, you thought. Just a hint of gray showing he was similar in age to Tom.

You were just about to ask how he and Tom knew each other, when Tom tried to take a peek down the top of your shirt… making a very blatant show of his intentions, going so far as to say “isn’t she sexy, Fish?” The discomfort showing on Frankie’s face matched your own, so when he suggested getting Tom inside, you silently thanked him with a nod.

The walk to your bedroom was silent, aside from Tom’s babbling. You and Frankie were on either side of him and you plopped him on the bed where he fell flat on his back. You nodded toward the door and Frankie made his way out, saying “G’night man —sleep it off and I’ll see you tomorrow,” after patting Tom’s leg in a friendly gesture.. almost pitying his friend, he shook his head as he walked out the door. You followed him outside and walked him to his truck.

“Thank you for bringing him home. And for helping me get him in the house.”

“Not a problem. He’s always been a lightweight and he had already started by the time I got there.”

Again, he shook his head and chuckled slightly before asking, “are you gonna be ok? I mean, do you need any extra help with him?”

“Oh. No, no, I’ll be fine” you look behind you toward the house. “He usually falls asleep pretty quickly once he’s in bed,” only a half lie.

“Ok then, well it was nice to meet you. I didn’t catch your name before.”

You tell him your name and he repeats it back and smiles slightly. “Have a good night.”

“You too..”

You watch the truck drive away until you no longer see the taillights. You know what’s waiting for you when you get back, so you don’t want to rush your walk back into the house.

There’s a reason Tom is a lightweight— He rarely drinks, normally only indulging when it’s fight night, so on occasion, he goes all out. These are the nights that weren’t a part of your arrangement. These nights, you adhere to your expectations as a wife… these nights you knew not to fight him. But something about tonight seemed different, and you’re not sure what brought on the change. Your only thought was maybe it had something to do with Frankie being in town…. You had never met him before tonight, so it seemed as though he didn’t live in the area or that he lived in the City. Whatever the reason, you wouldn’t find out tonight.

When you go back inside, Tom is ready and waiting for you.

—

The thought of having to tell Tom was making you physically ill, although it could be attributed to what led you to buying the test in the first place. Your thoughts continue unabashedly. You wish you could turn them off sometimes, but you try to stay positive—

This is a GOOD thing. A baby! You’re going to be a mother! —But the intrusive thoughts begin to take over—

Tom has never wanted kids. He’ll have even more to hold over me now. How will I ever get away from him with a child? A CHILD…

You slide to the floor with your head held in your hands—

This is a good thing.

#frankie morales #frankie catfish morales #frankie 'catfish' morales x reader #frankie x f!reader #triple frontier #triple frontier fic #pedro pascal character fanfic

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gazs-blue-hat · 9 months

Text

Sunflowers and Shotguns pt.4 (Small Town UA) Soap X Reader (Lamb)

An: Here we are with Lamb and Soap! This time with some angst and whumpy times.

Word Count: 2,236

Summary: Soap usually sleeps pretty well but when he struggled to fall asleep and hears cobbing in the middle of the night, he can't help but go investigate.

Tw: Mentions of nightmares, phantom limb pain,, vivid descriptions of injuries to a leg, unintentional self harm (Lip biting), (LMK if I missed anything)

I DO NOT GIVE PERMISSION TO ANYBODY HERE OR ON ANOTHER SITE TO REPOST, COPY, TRANSLATE OR FEED MY WORK TO AN A.I OF ANY KIND.

The air was getting colder as autumn faded and went. The ground was covered by frost in the morning and the trees were dropping their leaves left and right.

Due to the coming winter, you had been busy preparing her farm for the cold months ahead. The crops had been harvested and were being preserved, the animals had been fed a little bit more to get them a little insulation from the cold, and Ghost had added actual insulation to the various pens for the animals.

Since you had been working extra hard, Johnny couldn't help but notice you limped a bit more when you walked. You never removed her prosthesis around them, but he could tell it bothered you.

Price had said he saw the stump briefly for a moment when Tens had been over to do something with Lamb. He didn't mention much about it other than it looked painful. Your amputation had been done right below your knee so it 'wasn't as bad as Alex Keller's' he had said.

Johnny was incredibly curious but he knew better than to ask what happened. He wanted you to be comfortable with them in your house, and talking about a deeply traumatizing event was probably not a good way to do that.

You had warmed up to them in the weeks they had been there. September had come and gone, leaving the frigidity of October to swipe away the summer heat. You weren't silent around them anymore, only speaking when needed. You talked with them and shared little bits about your life. You explained where you had grown up and what your family life had been like.

Johnny would even dare say you two were 'friends' now. You spoke to him more often, sat next to him at meals, and asked him to do things with you instead of for you.

He still slept in the recliner in the main room, finding it incredibly comfortable. You had brought out blankets for himself and Gaz (Who was sleeping on the couch), and he didn't fail to notice that he got the fluffier ones. (Kyle didn't mind)

His nights were usually uneventful, being too tired from the day to really dream of anything. The work you had them doing kept them physically fit and was enough to tire them out.

This night wasn't so uneventful.

He found himself tossing and turning, trying to get comfortable in the large leather recliner. He had done less work today than normal and found his mind racing because of it. Instead of running down dark paths like usual, his mind was filled with thoughts of you.

He thought about how your smile was so genuine and excited about things. When one of your hens had laid an egg that was cracked, you had taken it into the house and put it in an incubator 'just to see what happened'. He watched as you looked down at the small egg, examining the small beating heart and blood vessels. You two had sat at the counter for hours, watching the little chick move and stretch. When the chick had passed away, he rubbed your back as you softly held the creature in your hands, whispering how proud of it you were. Proud that it had tried and had lived as long as it had.

He loved how kind you were to everything you saw and interacted with. You never pushed boundaries and respected each of them. You had gone through the effort of getting them the things they needed (Sometimes getting the items before they even asked).

Frustrated with himself, Johnny groaned and sat up, lowering the legs of the recliner. He decided that washing his face might help relax him so he silently walked towards the bathroom down the hall. Once he arrived at the bathroom and went to open the door, he heard muffled sobs.

He wouldn't say the person was crying, it was deeper than that. These were heaving sobs he had only heard coming from dying men on the battlefield. He looked towards your bedroom door, the source of the sound.

He knew his team's cries by heart. They all had nightmares, it came with the job. He had never heard cries like these coming from you. he knew he shouldn't but he couldn't help himself from trying to open your door. It was locked, as usual, but a locked door never stopped Johnny 'Soap' MacTavish from entering a room. He quickly made his way to his back, removing a set of lock picks. Making his way back to your door, it was a simple enough job to pick the four tumbler lock.

The door opened without a sound and he looked into your bedroom for the first time. The walls were a dark color and little twinkling lights hung on the ceiling. A welcoming and warm atmosphere filled this room, not unlike the lavender diffuser that sat on the nightstand next to your bed.

Your bed was large, a king-sized one probably. Nikon was laying on one side of the bed, his head in your lap. You were sitting up amongst a plethora of blankets and pillows, sobbing.

Johnny was able to see your prosthesis that had been propped up by your nightstand. It made sense that you wouldn't wear it to bed. Nikon sat his head up and whined loudly, getting up and walking over to Johnny. Your head was pressed down into your chest, your shoulders shaking with heaving sobs.

Nikon gently went behind Johnny and pushed him into the room. The dog then closed the door by pushing his nose against it. Your door swung inwards, easier to barricade and defend.

Johnny looked down at the dog with a raised eyebrow. Nikon made a soft boof' sound and jumped back on the bed, sitting his head against your good leg. Johnny slowly approached the bed, noticing how your head shifted to hear to him better.

"Um, hey there lass," he whispered. Your sobs halted and you looked up at him. Your usually bright (e/c) eyes were red and puffy. You swallowed and looked up at him. He could see your lips were bleeding from where you had bitten them to keep quiet.

"MacTavish..." you mumbled, looking at the closed door. He held up the lockpicks and shrugged. You said nothing, only letting out a cry of pain as you leaned your head back and took a deep shuttering breath.

"Nightmares?" Johnny asked as he sat on the side of the bed. You shook your head, hands clenched into fists on the sheets.

"Not this time." You mutter, exhaling the breath you had been holding. Johnny nodded and looked down at his hands. He didn't know what to do. Nikon nudged Johnny's hand with a wet nose. Johnny looked down and then understood.

Your leg

It was your leg that was hurting. The change in the weather and temperature was causing you pain. Price had said Alex suffered similar pains when things changed. Lucky for him, he lived in a place where the weather was pretty consistent. You had no such luck.

Before he could say anything else, you cried out again, hand clutching above the amputation site.

"It hurts. It hurts so fucking much." You sob. Your hands were shaking as you squeezed the aggravated skin. It was covered by a blanket so he couldn't see the damage.

"It hurts and it's not even there." You continue. Hot tears stream down your face and make little marks on the soft sheets. Johnny nods and shifts so he's sitting next to you on the bed. Both of his legs stretch out in front of him and he reaches an arm over your shoulders. He pulls you in close, allowing you to rest your head over his heart.

You stopped trying to hide your cries now. You hid your face in his chest and wailed. His chest absorbed most of the sound as you clawed at his shirt. He said nothing, only holding you close. His hand went around your back and up into your hair, scratching at your scalp and massaging it a bit. He was hoping that some other sensory input would make your mind remember that the leg wasn't there.

"There ya go, lass. Be as loud as you need. I'm not goin' anywhere." he said softly, his accent thicker with worry. You continued to cry into him, wetting his navy blue shirt with your tears.

"What can I do to help? Anything at all." He asks. You nod and point at your nightstand where a container of oil sat. Johnny recognized this as numbing cream. Tens must have given it to you.

"Alright, I can do that." He whispered. He didn't have to move to reach it, his arm long enough to grasp the opaque jar and bring it over. You looked up at him now, an expression of fear in your eyes.

"I understand lass. I want to help. I don't care what it looks like alright?" He reassured. You nodded, shifting the blankets and sheets over to reveal your legs.

In contrast to the jeans you usually wore, you were wearing shorts to sleep. They were simple and loose-fitting, enough to be comfortable but warm at the same time. Your left leg extended down to your toes which were painted a delicate blue. It reminded him of a forget-me-not flower. Your thighs and calf were coated in various cuts and scrapes from farm work. A large bruise was blooming from where a goat had gotten a little too rough with you.

Your right leg was a different story. Your right leg which had been amputated looked like a disaster. The skin was pockmarked and pulled tight. Scars from skin grafts and various injuries littered the skin. So much so that there was hardly any skin that was left unblemished. The site of amputation itself was the worst of all. The skin was red and irritated, burn scars and divots littered the space and small blisters from friction dotted the surface. You had been working too hard.

"Seamin' Jesus lass. I'm so sorry," he mumbled. He took in the extent of the damage, trying to imagine what could have caused such an injury. He didn't know what you had specialized in on your task force. Tens was clearly the medic and chosen sniper. Keys was the analyst and infiltration expert. Skip was your Captain. What you had done was a mystery to him still.

He opened the jar and reached his fingers into the cream. it was freezing against his fingertips and his fingers quickly went numb wherever the cream touched. This stuff was potent. He rubbed his hands together, ignoring the tingling he felt and he looked up at you, who had removed your face from his chest and was leaning against his shoulder.

"I'm gonna start now okay? You let me know if I'm doin' something ya don't like." He said calmly. You nodded, fisting the sheets in your grip. He exhaled slowly and placed his hands on your skin. You instantly relaxed and almost melted into his touch. Johnny felt how your skin was pulled taught and the muscles were tense.

Instead of massaging a leg, he felt like he was touching a corded rope. Your muscles had been rearranged and molded to fit this new way of living you had to do. The surgery must have taken a long time. He started out gently, making sure to cover everything with the cream before actually massaging it.

Once he was satisfied with the numbing job he had done, he started to apply gentle pressure to the skin. You winced a bit at first but then a low groan rumbled in your chest as you leaned your head back. Johnny could see your eyes fluttering as they rolled back in pure bliss.

"There ya are...relax," he mumbled as he continued. You did as he asked, going completely limp in his hands. Your wounded skin wasn't soft like he had expected it to be. The skin was rough and irritated, even chapped in some places. He continued to massage the skin, going deeper and deeper into the muscles as he worked. He couldn't feel his hands anymore but he didn't really care. The expression on your face was more than worth it.

After about fifteen minutes of treatment, you had fallen asleep. Nikon had gone to his bed in the corner, satisfied that you were alright. Johnny smiled as he felt you slump against him, soft snores escaping your mouth. He wiped his hands on his pants and moved so you were laying down. He pulled the covers back up and watched as you slept peacefully. He bent down and pressed a kiss on your forehead. As he turned to leave, your hand gripped his wrist.

'Don't leave. Please." You begged. Johnny nodded and pulled back the covers, sliding into the bed next to you. You shifted so your head rested over his heart, listening to the beating within. Johnny felt completely relaxed and just before his eyes fluttered shut he heard you speak.

"Thank you, Johnny." You whispered. You called him Johnny. Not Soap, or MacTavish. You called him Johnny.

"Any time bonnie, any time at all," he whispered back, wrapping his arm over your shoulders to press you close.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

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#johnny soap mactavish x reader #small town ua #call of duty #cod mwii #john mactavish x reader #call of duty mw2 #to be linked

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elisysd · 5 months

Text

37. Should I give up or should I just keep chasing pavements?

Masterlist - Previously -Next

Chapter soundtrack: Chasing Pavements - Adele

He had begged Christian with all he had to not say anything, to make him think he had misunderstood what Ethan had unintentionally revealed. He would have groveled at his feet if needed but he managed to persuade Christian to keep it to himself.

“I don’t like that, Ethan.”

“It won’t change anything, Christian! Unless something big happens, Kyle will be world champion and Ludwig P2. You won, so what does it change if Julia works or not with her dad? Actually, think of how it could benefit you! Now you know that whatever upgrades Ferrari is bringing, Julia worked on them. You can see by yourself how an amazing asset she will be to the team!”

“You’re a clever man, Ethan. Really clever. I like how you think. And you have a deal. Give me her phone number, I’ll give her a call tomorrow but in the meanwhile, I’ll have our team in the factory drafting her proposal.”

“Thank you Christian. For everything.”

“She hasn’t accepted, yet. I’ll try my best to have her but nothing is signed.”

“So you really want her?”

“I want to win. She is talented. I want to only work with the best so I’m going to do my best to have her and I won’t settle for a no.”

Julia was about to sleep when her phone rang. She expected to see Ethan’s name show up but was thrown aback when she saw an unknown number on the screen. She let it ring. She was a bit mad to not have been able to reach Ethan despite trying multiple times. She had sent him a text as soon as the race was over but barely got a thank you back. He had ended up, three hours after the end of the race, telling her that he was busy and would call her on his way to Brazil the next day. It was not helping Julia as she was supposed to meet with the woman in charge of decorating the vineyard for the wedding with her mom but she would try to fit the call in her hectic schedule. But when her phone rang a second time with the same number, she got curious and picked it up.

“Hello? Julia Leclerc here, who is it?”

“Julia, hello, Christian Horner here.”

“Chris… Christian? To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“I know that you are looking for a new job in F1 and I have an opening in the team, I was wondering if it is something that would interest you.”

She didn’t know what to say, it was probably the last thing she expected to hear.

“I… I mean, it’s very nice but I’m still contractually attached to Skoda…”

“2 millions.”

“Two what?” she couldn’t help but gasp. It was more than ten times what she was worth to Skoda.

“You would work in a direct relationship with our factory. Not only working on the development of the car but also on the conceptualisation of the next one. You would have a whole team under you. How does that sound.”

“I… I mean… why? I’m really flattered but… I don’t have experience….”

“Because Skoda never gave it to you but I know how to recognise talent and potential when I see it, and you miss Leclerc you are a diamond that needs to be polished.”

“I… I don't know what to say…”

“You would have your own car, we will take care of the accommodation, of course you would be needed on the tracks during race weekends. You would be closely working with Maserati as well. It’s going to be a lot of work, I won’t lie. A lot of hours but it’s also a professional challenge that I wouldn’t offer to anyone. You would be dedicating your life to the team.”

“I’m flattered to be considered, don’t get me wrong but… gosh it’s a lot. I don’t know if I’m up to the task.”

“I understand. I don’t need an answer straight away. I’ll give you the summer break but I’ll need to know by September.”

When she hung up, she let out a huge sigh that she was not aware she was holding back. Ferrari was her dream, her dad, the ultimate goal, all that she had ever done in her life was to end up at Ferrari. In her head it was out of the question to go anywhere else. She had always made decisions with her heart. Like her dad. Sure it cost her to miss some nice opportunities in the past but she had never regretted them, because she knew why and where they came from. But her own team, building her own car or at least participating in it? That was another dream of her, one she always thought she would achieve at Ferrari once she would have proven herself. But now Christian was offering everything she was dreaming of on a silver plate. But it wasn’t for Ferrari. That night she didn’t sleep very well.

It was the first thing she told her mom when she woke up the next day and if Lyanna was not already sitting, she would have fallen on the floor.

“Julia… That’s…”

“Unexpected? Incredible? Frightening? Exciting? Weird? Yeah, I know. I’m freaking out.”

“What are you going to do?”

“I… I don’t know…”

“But you are considering it, right?” Lyanna asked.

“I mean… I have to. It’s probably an opportunity that comes once in a lifetime. For someone like me, I mean.”

“You deserve it, Ju’. It’s just weird… Christian never does things out of kindness; he always has a hidden agenda. I don’t say that he doesn’t think you are the right choice and you wouldn’t be able to do it. But you barely have experience, you never proved what you could do with a car that he would be aware of…”

“That’s what I don’t understand. Why me?”

“Don’t you think Ethan could have pleaded your case?”

Julia would be lying if the thought didn’t cross her mind. After all, Ethan once promised to help her get out of her situation in Skoda back then but as he had never really talked about it with her, she thought he had moved on. But maybe she was wrong after all. She hoped he had not intervened. It was bad enough that she was thinking she would get in Ferrari because of her dad. If she were to accept the job in Lamborghini it would be because of her boyfriend. When would she finally have something that she deserves?

“I hope he didn’t…” she confessed.

“I hope so too.” her mom replied.

She would have liked to ask him if only she could get a hold of him. She really had, once again, the feeling he was ignoring her. No matter her texts or calls, they were left unanswered. And she knew he was not very busy, he was laughing in Ludwig's stories. She ended up giving up. She was tired of going after him and to answer him in seconds when he was calling her. It was about time he put on some work in their communications attempts.

It took days before he finally texted her, being unusually elusive when she told him she had something to announce. When she finally was able to reach out to him, it was only for him to tell her that he would probably need to cut short the call as he had a dinner to attend to with Chloe.

“I won’t be long then. I received a weird phone call a few days ago. You wouldn’t happen to know what it was about, right?”

“Why would I?” he replied, defensively.

“I don’t know? Maybe because he's Christian and that he offered me a job in Lamborghini. And not just any job. It’s big, Ethan.”

When she heard the long silence on the other side of the line, she knew he was already aware. She clenched her jaw and tried to contain a sigh.

“I’m going to ask you an answer and I want the truth. Did you or did you not ask Christian to offer me a position?”

“Julia…”

“It’s yes or no.”

“Yes, but…”

“How could you?” she said in a laconic voice. She was not mad at him, in a way she expected it and she didn’t know if it was something good or bad.

“I just wanted to help. I meant it when I said that you were talented and that you were wasting it away back then. I just talked to Christian, asked him to offer you something. I didn’t know it was going to be that type of position, I swear. It’s all you.”

“So you do know everything…Was it the reason why you avoided me lately?”

Another pause but if she closed her eyes it’s almost as if she could picture him trying to find a way out of the situation.

“Partly. I didn’t want to have to lie to you or I didn’t want you to get mad at me if I was telling you that I knew about the proposal. I needed time to think about the situation. And…”

“I’m not mad, Ethan. I just wish you would have told me. I wish you would talk to me more often… I feel you are distancing yourself from me and I don’t know why. What did I do?”

“It’s not you. It’s all me.” he tried to reassure her.

“That’s a very cliche line to use…”

“I heard you on the phone in Buenos Aires. Congratulations Martin. I was on my way to say congrats to your dad and I heard you…”he finally confessed.

“Ethan…. not again.”

“I know! Believe me, I know. It’s just… I can’t help it, okay? He makes you laugh, he makes you smile, he would be the perfect son-in-law. He is every moms’ dream. And me? I ignore you, I know I make you cry, I can be an ass when I want. I’m not perfect and I try to be the best for you because you deserve it, but… no matter how hard I try to change, the old me always comes back. I just want to make you happy but sometimes I wonder if you wouldn’t be happier without me.”

It was her turn now to be completely speechless. She had guessed that sometimes Ethan was doubting himself, that under that pile of arrogance there was an insecure guy that was trying to hide it by showing that he was better than everyone. But by now, she knew him better than that. She knew how hard it was for him to always get compared to his dad, she knew the pressure he was under. Pressured by the media, his team and most of all, himself. He wanted to be remembered for who he was not for who his dad was.

“You make me happy. But lately, I felt so alone in this relationship. I want to be there for you and I want us to talk about these things and find solutions together. But I can’t do that if you don’t talk to me and if you shut me out. I’m trying to work on myself to be more open to you, I know I’m not perfect either, but if I do something that hurts you, I need you to tell me.”

“I’m trying, Julia. I swear I do.”

But he didn’t tell her that he was not trying too hard because deep down, a part of him believed that this relationship wouldn’t work out, no matter how much they would try. And he was fighting this little voice every day. He loved her, why wasn’t it enough. He wanted the first part of the season to be over. He wanted to go home to her, to have her in his arms so he could control the situation. Not having her near was driving him crazy. He hoped that all his doubts and interrogations would be cleared once home. And he hoped that confessing to her would make their relationship stronger.

He ended up hanging up and Julia couldn’t help but have a bitter feeling about the conversation. She could see how the lack of communication was starting to be a major problem but despite how much she wanted it to work, she was starting to get tired of it. How could she feel so close to someone and at the same time so far away? She needed to see him, she needed to feel him. So, in a desperate attempt to try to find a solution she booked an impromptu flight to Canada. She wanted to surprise him and maybe they could have a real and deep talk about the situation.

Her eyes wandered on her desk to find Ethan’s flat keys. She played with them for a while, contemplating the idea of going there to work a little. She needed a little space to think. Think about Christian’s offer, think about her future at Ferrari, think about her relationship, think about herself for once. She packed a bag with a few things and told her mom she would be away for a few days. Seeing how her daughter was conflicted, Lyanna didn’t try to reason with her.

When she arrived, it was cold and dark. She started with opening the shutters and the window and unpacked the groceries she had picked up on the way. She rummaged a little through his cupboards to find them mostly empty. She knew he was barely there and didn’t see the point of making the flat feel homely. She went to his bedroom and went through his drawers. She didn’t know what she was searching for, even if she was searching for something. She just wanted to feel him, somehow. As if his place would give her an indication of what he wanted from her. She went to his bedside and opened the drawer to find a frame. Turning it she almost dropped it. It was a bigger picture and with a higher quality of the picture of her and Louis in the karting competition they had gone to, the very first time they went out with both families.

Looking at it she knew she had made the right decision to follow her heart and to give them a chance. Something beautiful between them was there, under the surface, if they managed to break it she knew deep down that it would become the greatest thing in her life. But they still had a long way to go.

She stayed at his place until the Sunday race, comfortably sitting on the sofa. But unfortunately the race went short for Ethan that had to DNF during the formation lap after his team detected a failure on his engine. Julia didn’t even watch the race, spending the two hours on the phone with him, trying to find the words to console him.

“I want the summer break to be there already. I’m tired, I’m sick of hearing what people are saying. I’m not dumb, I see the look on their faces. They don’t have to say anything, I know they are thinking about my dad. Do you know what I heard a journalist telling someone in the paddock? That Maserati was thinking of not renewing my contract. That’s bullshit but I’m tired of the false rumors and I’m tired of feeling alone. I want someone to have my back for once.”

“I have your back.” she said.

“No offense Julia, but I meant someone that matters.” hearing her silence he was quick to add, “Someone that matters in the sport, I meant. You matter but it’s different.”

“In every season there are ups and downs. You hit a down after a few races but I’m sure you’ll come back stronger after the break.”

“Only two races and then it’s your parents' wedding. I thought about something…”

“Dangerous.”

“Shut up. Kyle is taking Romy to the Maldives, it’s a surprise don’t say anything, that means I don’t have any other plans. Would you like to go somewhere? Anywhere, I don’t care as long as it’s with you.”

“Ethan Verstappen, is that an attempt at romanticism?” she joked.

“Haha. Very funny. What do you think?”

“I think it would do me some good. I think I need it, too.” she confessed.

“Did you think about Lamborghini’s proposal?”

“I did, yes. And I'm just as lost and confused. I don’t know what to do… This job is my dream, this is everything I worked so hard for, all my life. But it’s not for the team I want. It would be like betraying my dad if I was accepting.”

“I’m going to play the devil’s advocate here. Do you think your dad would give you such a position in the next three to five years if you were working there?”

Julia knew the answer. Her dad had always been a firm believer of ‘if you work and prove yourself hard enough, things will go your way’. She knew that she would eventually have the same kind of position in the team, but not as fast as what she could have if she was saying yes to Lamborghini.

“I’m not stupid, I know that I can’t dream of something better than what Christian is offering. I’m not naive.”

“I know your love for Ferrari and I respect it but… close your eyes and imagine that: you, building the fastest car of the grid and me in that car. We could be world champions, Julia. Together. I don’t think Ferrari has what it takes to fight for the title. Not next year and probably not the year after. So yeah, sure you get to work with your dad, but in Lamborghini you would work with the best of the best. You would fit so well. And you would be working on both Maserati and Lambo cars.”

“Sounds like a very good dream.”

“With a very nice paycheck as well.”

“You are messing with my head.”

“At the end of the day, I want you to be somewhere where you feel like your skills are valued. I want to see you thrive. If you think you’ll fit better at Ferrari, I’ll support you. But blue would be a very nice color on you.”

“So, you won’t get mad if I end up choosing my dad. “

“I won’t.”

“Even if it means I’ll get to work closely with Martin?”

“Don’t push it.”

“I’m serious though. If I end up choosing Ferrari, I need to know that you’ll still trust me and that you won’t throw a tantrum every time I’ll be near him. Because it will inevitably happen.”

“Do I hate the idea? Absolutely. Do I trust you with him? I do. But don’t ask me to trust him, I won’t.”

“I can survive knowing you trust me.”

The next week was spent in a blur for Julia. Her mom had to fly to Los Angeles for a few meetings, leaving her in charge of the house, her brother, working on what areas they could try to improve on with her dad and still making arrangements for the wedding. She had so much things going on that she didn’t have time to call Ethan. She was running on her third coffee of the morning after spending a night dreaming on what it would be like to move to England and work in the Lamborghini’s factory with the team, maybe even crossing paths with Kyle or Ludwig at the coffee machine. It had been a really sweet dream, when her dad rang her for their weekly meeting about the car.

They spent the hour talking about the data until Charles caught Julia daydreaming.

“Ju’, are you still with me?”

“Uh? Yeah… Sorry, I was elsewhere. I’m listening.”

Charles stopped sharing his screen and stared at her.

“Did your mom finish driving you crazy with the wedding?”

“Actually, it’s almost done. Most of the things are booked. The venue, the hotel, the orchestra and the catering. Now it’s just details but mom handles most of them. I’ll have the bridesmaids fitting the day after tomorrow. I can’t wait.”

“So, if it’s not that, what’s wrong?”

Julia bit down on her pencil, trying to find the right way to tell her dad about the opportunity from Lamborghini.

“I… I’ve been approached by a team to work with them.”

“You wouldn’t tell me if you were not seriously considering it.” he said after a pause.

“It’s Lamborghini. And it’s a pretty big contract.”

“Of course it is… Christian when I’ll catch you…” Charles mumbled.

“I didn’t want to hide it from you and risk him saying anything to you and learning it that way.”

“I want you to work with me, Julia. That’s always all I’ve ever wanted. Not only because you are my daughter but because you have the mindset to work for Ferrari. You know the history, you know the challenges, you know the teamspirit. You fit there. I’ve always imagined you next to me on the pitwall.”

“You want me to be a race engineer?” she asked, surprised. She had never thought that it would be something that she could be qualified for.

“I wanted you to work in the engineering department first but always thought that you would be much more useful on that wall. The way you see the races and analyze them… you have what it takes. I wanted you to work on the next car and his upgrades as a junior engineer. For two or three years, just so you can still learn how the factory works and our process. I thought you could participate in the after races debriefs and the setups meetings. And then, when you would be comfortable with all of that, I would have asked you to move to the pitwall. As race engineers. I thought Martin could use your patience and calm, he is a little reckless sometimes. I was going to give you a contract by the end of october, so you could officially start straight away. I’m already negotiating with Skoda to buy back your contract with them. So, now you know. The question is, did Christian offer you better than that?”

It confused Julia even more than she already was. Her, being a race engineer in the future? That was totally different from what she had always imagined. It was a challenge, it would force her to come out of her shell, she would get the attention for sure. She could recognise her dad in this. How he always pushed her hard to go beyond her limits. Christian was offering her stability, something she knew she would thrive in. Her dad was offering her a challenge, something out of her comfort zone. And she didn’t know what to choose.

“Would you hate me, if I wasn’t choosing Ferrari?”

“Of course not. I would be disappointed, of course. But I want you to be happy. I don’t want you to make a decision based on how I would react, Ju’. I want you to think of you. Choose what will make you the happiest. Don’t worry about me.”

She nodded before changing the subject.

“Could you maybe arrange me a paddock pass for Montreal? I want to surprise Ethan… I miss him.”

“You don’t even have to ask. You know I always have one ready for you.”

It’s with a smile that she ended the call, her heart and her mind less heavy. She couldn’t wait to go to Canada even more after the Mexican GP results that had once again been an occasion to celebrate for Ferrari after a beautiful podium for Elijah. Ethan had a nice race managing a nice P6 that gave him a little smile after the last few ones that had taken a toll on him. And Julia couldn’t wait to go to Canada to surprise him. She hoped that they would finally be able to talk things through and to spend some quality time together. That’s all she wanted and all she needed.

Author's note: So Julia decided to go to Canada! How do you think it will go? Will Ethan be happy to see her or mad? And she has a pretty big dilemma ahead... What would you do if you were in her shoes? What do you think will happen next? Let me know your theories, I love to read them.

Don't hesitate to leave a comment or an ask, as well as reblogging and leaving a like. Besides the fact that I absolutely love to read you, it helps a lot for the story to find its audience. I also have a taglist for this story, so if you want to be added so you never miss a chapter, let me know.

Taglist:

@herondalism @aundercover @musingsbyshreya @karmabyfernando @reengard @mycenterfold @smoooothoperator

#writing #fiction #charles leclerc #f1 fanfic #f1 fic #f1 x oc #charles leclerc fanfic #max verstappen fanfic #max vertsappen

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buckets-and-trees · 1 year

Text

A Man Is Not His Song - More than a Melody's Needed [1/?]

Series: A Man Is Not His Song

Fandom: MCU

Characters/Pairings: eventual Bucky x female!Reader

Word Count: 3.5k

Summary: After DC but before Romania, The Winter Soldier wanders, trying to figure out who James Buchanan Barnes was, who he is, and stay hidden from anyone who could be looking for him.

Content Warnings: none this chapter

Additional Notes: This will be a short series – no more than three to five parts. I started this in September, but of course was working on The Brooklyn Boys and then took up Silent Screams in Wildest Dreams and was doing my best to finish the latter while it was still a tiny bit spooky season. I thought this would be a one-shot, but after getting back to this and mulling it over for the past few days, I think it actually is a short series, not just a one-shot. The title for this series (and this chapter) is taken from Feist's A Man Is Not His Song.

“Wait! Stop!”

Within seconds the stranger had crossed the room, had his right hand around your wrist, and the other gloved hand – instead of going for your throat or to cover your mouth or whatever else you expected – half-covered and half-gripped the phone in your hand.

“I’ll leave, just please don’t call anyone.”

“You– “

Your heart was beating out of your chest, adrenaline pumping through your veins, and your hands were trembling, but you saw an undercurrent of fear in the eyes of the hulking man invading your space. Possibly more afraid than you.

“You’re hiding. Who are you running from?”

“I don’t know the full reach of who I’m running from, but they are embedded in a lot of the system, which is why I need you not to call anyone.”

Your brow furrowed, your pulse starting to slow as you studied him.

“Give me an hour before you call. Please.”

You bit your lip. Everything in his look, the strain on his face, it was all desperation and fear. It wasn’t pathetic, clearly the man wasn’t weak or helpless, but it was tense.

You slowly brought your left hand up to rest on top of his right hand which was still gripping your wrist. “I won’t call anyone, and this could be the stupidest thing I’ve ever done, but stay here if you need to.”

It was his brow furrowing now. “Really?”

“My mom would be screaming that I’ve lost my mind, but my grams and gramps always did a good deed when they could, and this was their cabin. Besides,” you broke off and nodded your head to the other side of the kitchen where your border collie stood, “Knox doesn’t seem to have a problem with you, and he’s a better judge of character than anyone.”

The dog was certainly alert to the situation but seemingly unworried about the stranger, only that the two of you seemed tense.

Slowly he withdrew his hands from their grip on your wrist and your phone, and you each took a step back.

“Now if you’re staying, you can make earn your keep by getting the groceries from the car.”

He still regarded you with suspicion, but he nodded and moved towards the door, glancing once more over his shoulder at you before exiting.

You took a deep shaky breath, leaning against the counter. Your heart had slowed slightly from its racing pace, but it was still beating rapidly. You had no idea who had taken over your body and seemed to handle that in such a cool and collected manner, but whoever she was, at least she kept you from peeing your pants.

You moved quickly from the kitchen to the great room, Knox falling into step with you. There was a blanket near the fireplace along with a journal and a couple of books, a very utilitarian black backpack next to the couch.

Quick checks of the bedrooms made it appear that everywhere else had remained untouched by the stranger. You stepped into the bathroom upstairs and splashed a bit of cool water on your face, then patted your face dry before taking another deep breath and steeling yourself to go back to the kitchen.

The primary reason you’d sent the man out to the car to get the groceries was because he could have used the opportunity to take the car and get away. Yes, you had your keys, but the man had gotten into the secure cabin without any apparent damages, and if he could pick a lock and disarm a security system that quickly, he was on the run and could probably hotwire a car, too, and if you sent him outside to the car, he could make his break for it. You’d rather him take his out now and report the car missing – he would likely abandon it not far from here, and you’d be able to recover it. It’s what you would do… or rather what you would write into the plot for one of your characters on the run to do.

Knox had stuck with you around the house, but he trotted ahead as you returned to the kitchen. Once you entered, you found Knox surreptitiously following the man around as he put away the groceries.

It was a scene that would be mundane if only he weren’t a stranger.

He looked at you every moment or so, a mix between skittish and suspicious. You still felt a little trepidatious, but the fact that this hulking specimen of a man – with a thick neck, a strong jaw, and a chest and arms that were clearly rippling with muscles on muscles that he was trying to keep covered up – was nervous calmed you more and more. If he were deranged, the crazy would be showing more, and if he were a threat, he’d be projecting confidence or danger, right?

“You seem to have things handled here. It’s been a few weeks since anyone’s been around, so I’m going to take care some other things around the cabin.”

You turned on your heel, then paused and looked back over your shoulder at him. “I guess it hasn’t been a few weeks… how long have you been here?”

He looked directly at you as he answered, “Two nights.”

You nodded and then left him there in the kitchen. The cabin had been modestly updated over the many years, so truthfully there wasn’t a long list of things for you to take care of, but you did go check to make sure the water main and hot water heater were on, switched on the two breakers that get switched off between visits, and then went to the stacks on the south side of the house to collect some wood for the fireplace.

Fall in the cabin had always been one of your favorite times. Summer meant trips down to the lakefront, bike rides, family, bonfires, sleep outs under the stars. Winter was cold, snowy, dotted with holidays and weekend getaways, hot coffee, cider, cocoa, tea, lots of toast, and curling up in blankets. Spring was fresh, new, energizing, and anticipation for summer. But fall danced between warm and cool in the way that invited sweaters and a good fire in the fireplace at night but without the bitter cold. Fall was the time when the rest of the world seemed to be getting back to business after summer, but a chance you’d begun to seize each year to get away, sometimes for as long as six or eight weeks, to write and research, away from any distractions, in near solitude as the rest of the family took time off from any holidays or vacations, leaving the cabin completely at your disposal.

After depositing your armful of logs by the fireplace, you began stacking them neatly as your grandfather had shown you and your brother as kids. It also put you near those volumes you’d clocked earlier, and now you could see it’s not a journal and some books, but two journals and three books – one about World War II, one on the Korean War, and one about the rise and fall of the Iron Curtain. As a writer, you knew the signs of research someone is invested in when you saw it. You could tell one journal was full due to how worn it was – not old, but thoroughly used already – and the other next to it had a pen resting a few pages into it, keeping it from closing flat. You burned to reach for the journals but held yourself back only with great restraint.

You could tell the stranger hadn’t made a fire of any kind, which early October certainly called for, but which made sense if he was hiding. Smoke from a chimney that wasn’t expected to be occupied could have had one of the remote neighbors calling or stopping by. The other cabins weren’t close, but it was the type of place where the neighbors generally knew each other, had a couple of summer bonfires together, and this cabin had been in your family for a few generations.

Luckily it wasn’t too cold for the season yet, but after dark you would be glad for the heat, and so you got to making a fire since it would take a few hours for the heat to generate true warmth through the cabin. Once you got a small but strong fire going, you carefully staked in a few more logs so it would be sustainable for a few hours.

You returned to the kitchen, following the smell of beef stew and warm bread. The stranger was slowly stirring a pot on the stove, and he turned his head to nod at you as you entered. You stopped at the very edge of the counter, still giving him some space.

“So, what’s your name?” you ask.

“James,” he answers.

James was such a generic name it could be fake, but you weren’t going to press it.

You offered up your name as well. Only your first name.

After watching him for another moment, you spoke again. “Why does my dog already like you more than me, James?”

He lets out an almost laught that’s more of a huff. “I think he’s cautiously wary. Hasn’t moved from that spot watching me.”

You smiled, then bent down and held your hand out for Knox, and he immediately sauntered over for some pats and ear scratches. It did appear he’d been watching James, but your dog didn’t seem overly concerned with the presence of the stranger anymore.

You moved to the sink to wash your hands, and Knox moved back to the spot he routinely took up in the kitchen (the spot James said he’d been watching from). James pulled the bread from the oven and began cutting into hearty slices. You started puling bowls, plates, glasses, and silverware out and set the table for two. Within a few minutes, you were both seated at the table, James dishing up servings of the stew to each of your bowls while you started buttering a slice of the warm bread. Knox had come over to lay quietly under the table at your feet.

The dinner started in silence, and you could feel him glancing up to look at you as much as you were at him. You were so eager to launch a thousand questions at him, but you didn’t want him to bolt. As dangerous and idiotic as this was logically – keeping a stranger on the run in your cabin in the woods during the off-season – you were caught in the curiosity of it now.

And even though you had come to the woods to get away from everyone, now that there was someone here, maybe you didn’t want to be so completely alone after all.

His first few looks over at you had been true glances, quick, clocking, assessing. After a few more minutes, you could feel a first and then second longer, more speculative looks, and you refrained from your looks, letting him take you in, willing him to feel more at ease in your presence.

The third time he really looked at you though, you smiled and looked openly back at him. He didn’t seem to be alarmed or bothered by you meeting his gaze, and he did not return your smile, but his expression seemed to soften slightly in the eyes.

“Okay,” you started, “I want to know why you picked this place and what you’ve figured out about my family since you’ve been here for a couple of days.”

He continued to slowly chew his mouthful of stew, his eyes narrowing just a fraction as he regarded your face, no doubt trying to assess your tactics, see if there was a trap to dodge.

“Answer my two queries, and then you can ask me two of your own,” you offer.

He nodded, swallowed, then started to answer.

“The cabins here are remote but accessible to civilization, and spread out enough out here in the forest to be private. This one looked inauspicious and the back porch has heavy tree cover on both sides, which allows for slipping in and out without drawing attention.”

“Oh.” Of course, the trees your grandparents had put in to provide plenty of privacy so the family could always relax without worrying about prying eyes from any neighbors meant perfect seclusion. You wouldn’t suggest to the family that you thin the trees at all, but it was clearly time for an exterior camera system to be able to keep tabs on the place when no one was around.

“Your grandparents built the cabin in 1972, brought their kids often. A large addition was made ten or twelve years ago that corelates with the architecture, but it’s clearly newer and doubled the size of the cabin, and it tracks with the number of family members that grew in the photos on the walls. Your grandparents spent their full summers here in their retirement years. Now that they’re gone, the four sons they left behind still occupy the full summer season here, but only with all of you here at the same time for Independence Day. Your father is the oldest; the cabin was left to him, though he generously lets any of the family use it. The pantry is generally well-stocked with a mix of home-canned and shelf-stable foods. There’s an extensive game closet, and the study is a smaller room, but it has a decent library started by your grandfather and an old desk that looks like it’s been used routinely over the years.”

You nod as he makes each of his correct assertions.

“One of your uncles is a photographer. Your grandfather wrote history. There’s another family author with a featured spot on the wall, but your genre is historical fiction, specifically the American Revolution.”

You sit back in your chair a bit and drum your fingers on the table before breaking your eye contact and deciding to reach for another slice of bread.

“You’re correct on all accounts.”

“I know.”

“So how did you-“

“No,” he cuts you off. “It’s not your turn to ask questions anymore.”

Your shake your head but close your mouth. When he doesn’t immediately pose his questions, you push your chair back from the table, going to retrieve a jar of your favorite jam from the cupboard.

After sitting back down, he still didn’t speak, but you see he has filled his bowl with more stew. You spread a smooth layer of butter over you bread, then covered it with a layer of the jam. Knox shifted at your feet, content to rest and wait, but you knew his movement indicated he was hopeful either of you will drop something to the floor for him.

“What are you writing?”

You groaned, then swallowed the bite of bread you’d just taken. “Did my editor send you? That’s exactly what she’d like to know, too.”

Rather than pressing you for more, he let the topic sit with you, but in a way that indicated he was waiting for you to say more. It’s a behavior you would soon become familiar with from him, though you didn’t know it then.

“Did you read any of my stuff?”

He cocked his head, raising an eyebrow, and you saw the spark of mirth in his eyes.

“Right,” you responded and rolled your eyes. “Not my turn for questions.”

He nodded, then continued eating, eyes on you.

“I would be more annoyed if I weren’t a little impressed at your commitment to the bit.”

“You still haven’t answered.”

“Because I’m not writing anything right now. The research in the time period is just as interesting as it always has been, but I don’t have a story that’s pulling my curiosity yet. No spark, no intrigue, no inspiration.”

You let silence flow between you again and took the moments to finish off your slice of bread. You debated internally for a moment, but then reached for another slice, layering it with butter and jam, cut it down the middle and offered half of it to James just as he was setting his spoon down.

“Here, I can’t eat the whole thing.”

He took it without comment but studied it for a moment, then he turned his piercing blue eyes back to you.

“What makes you so comfortable around me?”

Your stomach flipped. Truly you weren’t comfortable around him, but you didn’t feel unsafe. He made you nervous, but – stupid or not – it wasn’t for the logical reason of him being a total stranger who could murder you at any moment. No, it had nothing to do with that and everything to do with the dark hair that hung slightly across his face, his strong jaw, the muscles barely concealed by his layered shirts, and especially in the way his eyes looked at you as if he were looking into you, not just at you.

You realized you’d taken too long to answer, and you hoped he didn’t notice your cheeks heat slightly. “Like I said before, Knox has always been a good judge of character,” you quickly said. It was true, and your dog seemed just as much at ease with him as with you and many of your close family and friends. “He’s extremely well-behaved, but he’s not content and at ease with everyone he meets.”

“Hmm,” he hummed.

“And now I can ask you more questions,” you said with a grin.

He finally broke off his eye contact again, turning it to the bread and jam in his hand. “I’d much rather listen to you talk,” he admitted. Then he took a bite, and his eyes immediately closed, and he moaned as he chewed and then swallowed.

You laughed lightly. “So, you like it?”

He opened his eyes again and shot what could be considered a glare at you. “It shouldn’t be this good.”

You watched him fight with quickly devouring the rest of it and trying to slowly savor each bite. He then reached for the last slice of bread that had been put out for dinner, buttered it, and slathered it with an even layer of jam.

You grinned, but pushed away from the table, grabbing your dishes to take them to the sink. “I should take Knox out for his evening walk before it gets too late.”

Hearing his name and the word out, Knox was quick to get up and follow you.

“I’ll clear dinner,” James said.

You nodded, then headed out of the kitchen. You ran upstairs and rifled through your bags to get your favorite sweatshirt and threw it on. At the back door, you slipped into your boots and put the harness and leash on a very patient Knox, then headed out into the crisp evening air. It was just hitting twilight, and you and Knox both were keen for a long stretch of your legs after the afternoon’s long drive up to the cabin. You also needed to walk off some of the lingering adrenaline and nervous energy from the presence of your unexpected guest.

Your adventurous dog was always up for a long walk, but by the time you finally returned, he seemed to perk up seeing the cabin back in his sights. By that time you’d also worked out why you were amenable to bunkering down with your strange intruder.

Listlessness.

Your life was good, but you were languishing in a period of dullness. Nothing new, no relationship, lacking inspiration in your writing, feeling more like you were treading water in your life than making any progress. There wasn’t anything bad, hardly anything to even complain about, but nothing noteworthy.

As reckless and dangerous as it was to allow a stranger who had broken into a cabin in the woods to continue staying with you, you craved a little reckless danger in your soul. You had Knox, your phone, and your intuition.

And your intuition was certainly aware of the situation, but when you replayed that first minute with him, where he could have easily overpowered or hurt you and didn’t, and you saw that fear in his eyes when he pled with you simply not to call anyone because he was trying to stay hidden, you felt this was a reasonable risk.

But not if you thought about it too much.

It was what it was.

He could have left in the commotion of your arrival out one of the other doors or probably any of the windows. He could have left when you went to check around the house – twice. Instead, he unloaded the groceries and made dinner.

Even if you’d caught him off guard initially and then he’d only stayed to fuel up one last time with the dinner, your evening walk with Knox had given him ample time to either escape or set a proper trap for you, and so you’d know what fate lay before you as soon as you got back inside.

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If you enjoyed, reblog to help others find this story AND to normalize fic-reblogging culture around here. I’m still new on the scene, but more established writers that I admire around here are spreading the call that we all need to reblog to keep this place a happy home for fic writers in the fandom.

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donteattheappleshook · 2 years

Text

Captain Swan Fics Masterpost

List below the cut

Find me on Ao3 as donteattheappleshook

WIPS

His

Read it on Ao3

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Mature widower with good home wishes to make acquaintance of a hardworking girl or widow. No children. Object matrimony. When Emma Swan flees scandal in New York to marry a man she’s never met in Storybrooke, Montana, she doesn’t have any illusions of finding love. But when she’s picked up at the station by Killian Jones, it finds her regardless. Despite sharing his home, his bed, and his heart, she can never truly be his.

Rated M.

Not Broken At All

Ao3

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Season 1 Neverland AU. Emma is still trying to adjust to her new life as Sheriff of Storybrooke and mom to Henry, who still believes everyone in town is a fairytale creature. When she finds a badly beaten, one handed man while patrolling, she's convinced he's crazy. he is, after all, rambling about fairies and shadows and crocodiles. But when Henry is suddenly taken by what Emma swears (but can't believe) was a shadow, the madman in the hospital might be her only hope of getting her son back. Whether he likes it or not.

Rated M.

***

Complete:

(not so) young, drunk and alone

Ao3

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“Swan, it’s me. ‘M so sorry I ‘avnent called for… September, October, Nov… three months. Shit that’s too many months. ‘M sorry but I need your help. The sherrffeff won’t let me leave. He says you have to pick me up - well not you but ‘ynow someone. I don’t know anyone else. Oh! It’s Killian by the way. Killian Jones. I don’t know how many Killians you know but I’m that one. The dickhead who ghosted you. ‘Nway, if you could call me back that would be just - awesome. Yur prolly not gonna call me back. I wouldn’t call me back. ‘Nway… yeah. It’s Killian. Thanks.”

Rated (light) M

***

Barefoot in the wildest winter

Ao3

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She wasn’t supposed to come back. It had been a stupid plan, thinking she could get in and out of Storybrooke without anyone knowing she was here. Just catch the skip, bring him in and go back to Boston without her brother finding out that she’d lied about not being able to come home for Christmas like she did every year. There’s some kind of cosmic joke being made at her expense. There has to be for this day and this storm to have led her here of all places, on tonight of all nights.The walk to the building feels all too familiar and she struggles to push back the memories of the last time she was here as she works up the nerve to make her way up the stairs, to knock on the door. There’s still time to run. “Swan?” “Hey, Killian.”

Rated M (E?)

Hello, again

Ao3

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Killian never saw a lover more than once, never called a past encounter again after he or she had left, never even got their phone number. He never said hello a second time. All he was every interested in since the loss of his wife was a single night.

Emma had rules. She only ever went to bed with strangers. She didn’t do relationships or friends with benefits or second nights. She’d learned young how dangerous feelings could be.

Neither had ever met another person so clearly uninterested in any kind of romantic relationship as themselves, with so impossible a risk of developing affection. So in the history of attempts at truly casual sex, this might be the first time it could actually work.

A silver!Hook AU

Rated E.

Give me my yesterdays

Ao3

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Neal was a great dad. He took care of her and Henry, he showed up to every track and field race, he was home for every holiday. She wasn’t unhappy. She had her family and her friends. It was fine. It was enough. Until her son went off to college and her husband started working late, and a twenty-something year old moved in next door.

Rated M.

The Dick Pic Debacle

Ao3

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“Alright, what the hell is wrong with you two?” Will finally demanded. “Emma saw my dick and now it’s awkward.” Belle nearly choked on her drink. “She what? How?” “Neal sent her a dick pic. So I sent one back to get him to piss off. Emma found it by accident.”

Rated E.

It Was Only a Kiss

Ao3

Ch 1 2 3 4

Neverland may kill her. If it’s not her fear for Henry, then it will her exhaustion, or her doubt, or the overwhelming despair that she’ll never get out of here alive, that she’ll fail her son, that she’ll fail everyone. There’s only one thing she’s found that can silence it all, that can make her feel real again. She shouldn’t be seeking comfort in Hook. She shouldn’t, but she does. It was only a kiss. That was all it was supposed to be. But now that she’s started, she doesn’t think she can stop. Not now that she knows what it’s like. Canon Divergent.

Rated E.

She Came from the Water

Ao3

Ch 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 Bonus

Between his dissatisfying job, a constant battle to keep seeing his daughter, and a history of mistakes, losses, and broken dreams, Killian Jones has no place for magic in his life. But when he pulls in his fishing nets one evening only to find a woman caught in them, his life becomes infinitely more complicated. Is she a siren, a selkie, like his daughter believes, or just another lost soul like himself? Suddenly, his life is a thing of fairytales; beautiful women hidden away in cottages, selkie husbands coming back to claim them, and, just maybe, a chance at happily ever after. Ondine AU.

Rated M.

How long, love, before you go (part 4 of Lover of the Light)

Ao3

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The story Killian and Emma told her parents in part 3, of how they met and fell in love.

This whole chapter is a completely self indulgent piece that nobody asked for but I needed to write...

Rated E

Dare I say forever... (part 3 of Lover of the Light)

Ao3

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He’d turned the tavern upside down trying to find her, had scoured the streets for any sign of her golden hair, of the eyes he’d only just been gazing into. But she was nowhere, and the panic started to settle. No. No, it has to have worked. That was why they found the bloody star in the first place - light magic, no tricks, a wish that would send them both home. But she’s not with him.

The reunion of WishEmma and SilverWishHook after the events of Lover of the Light and Ghosts that we Knew. Also affectionately (and agressively) nicknamed Wish Baby

Rated E

Ghosts That We Knew (part 2 of Lover of the Light)

Ao3

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What happened in Storybrooke during the events of Lover of the Light. Wish Emma had to go somewhere...

Rated E.

Lover of the Light

Ao3

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After the Evil Queen grants Emma’s wish to never be the Savior, she wakes up in the Enchanted Forest, suddenly the princess she never wanted to be. She wants her real life back, her real family back, and she knows there’s only one person she can count on to help her. A Wish Realm AU.

Rated E.

Some Cupid Kills with Arrows

Ao3

Ch 1 2 3 4

Emma and Killian hate each other. They have since the night they met. Or at least since the morning after. So Emma is dreading having to deal with them being Maid of Honour and Best Man at her brother’s wedding. But, as their friends grow more and more annoyed at their constant bickering and a masquerade Stag and Doe turns everything on it’s head, the entire bridal party come to a startling realisation: Emma and Killian might just be perfect for each other. With a little scheming and some well-timed chaos, maybe they can stop yelling at each other long enough to realise it too. Much Ado About Nothing AU.

Rated M.

There is a Pirate in the Dungeon

Ao3

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There is a pirate in the dungeon. All the serving girls are too afraid to go down the steps and bring him his meal. All but one.

This fic is based on a beautiful little story from The Starless Sea that just screamed of Captain Swan so strongly that I couldn't resist. Rated T.

I Don’t Want to Wait Till Christmas (To Love You)

Ao3

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Emma’s done something stupid. She’s told her mom that she has a boyfriend and has promised to bring him home for Christmas dinner. The problem is she doesn’t have a boyfriend, she hasn’t even had a real date in twelve years. Luckily, her best friend, Killian Jones, is there to help - even if he has to make her online dating profile himself. AU.

Rated M.

I Know

Ao3

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Inspired by @carpedzem’s beautiful artwork. Emma hasn’t been in many sword fights in her life but she’s won them all. Well, almost all of them. All of them except that one in Neverland with Killian. But she did beat him at Lake Nostos… right?

Rated T.

Playacting

Ao3

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Emma has finally left her awful boyfriend after nearly a decade. But when he makes her meet him in a bar to pick up the last of her stuff, she risks falling victim to his usual tactics of sending her crawling back to him. Thankfully, the handsome bartender is there to lend a hand. A fake-boyfriend AU. Heavily Anti-Neal so don’t read if that’s not your thing.

Rated E.

Your Pole or Mine

Ao3

(I can’t find it on tumblr)

Chapter 1 by @hollyethecurious Chapter 2 by me

Killian hadn’t really had a chance to make his neighbor’s acquaintance since he’d moved in a few weeks ago, but he had seen her often enough to know how very much he wished for an introduction. Not just because she was stunningly beautiful with her long blonde hair, bright green eyes, and creamy complexion, but because he felt they likely had quite a bit in common, given the odd hours they both seemed to keep. Her current predicament with her parcel might finally afford him the opportunity to connect with her in a more meaningful way than simple waves and muttered hellos. That is, until said parcel caused him to voice the assumption he’d held about her vocation; that her occupation might be the same as his own. Turns out the late nights, provocative outfits, and arrival of a fitness dance pole did not mean what he thought it did.

“You think I’m a stripper?”

Bloody Hell.

Rated E.

Scrabble and a Great Many Other Things

Ao3

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Anonymous AU Prompt: Emma pushed Killian away when he confessed his feelings to her. He’s finally returned home, a bit broken by the world. Will she finally have the guts to tell him what she always regretted not saying?

Rated T.

Seal of Approval

Ao3

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Prompt: Captain Swan and Snowing go on a double date during the six weeks of quiet in season 4.

Rated M.

Some Fairytale Bliss

Ao3

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Set during Operation Mongoose: Part 2. Missing scene. Emma decides to teach the shy deckhand a thing or two about swordplay. Fluffy smut. Cannon(ish).

Rated E.

Of Cars and Bars

Ao3

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When Emma Swan is offered the chance to go on tour as an opener for one of the most popular up and coming bands of the decade, the last thing she expects is to find that the lead guitarist is the stranger she had a one night stand with five years ago. Musicians AU.

Rated E.

Stone Hearts

Ao3

Ch 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13

Emma should have known. She should have known that they couldn’t just go to the underworld and not suffer any consequences. She should have known they’d bring something back with them. Cannon Divergent after 5x21 Last Rites. No Hyde. No serum. No Evil Queen split. No prophecy. No season 6.

Rated M.

Just Human Volume 2

Ao3

Ch 1 2 3 4 5

SEQUEL A continuation of my CSSNS2018 story Just Human. Now that Killian is [redacted for spoilers] and Mary Margaret knows everything, what does life have in store for a group of supernatural misfits? With the threat of Gold gone, Emma learns that sometimes just being human is the most complicated challenge of all. Being Human AU.

Rated M.

Just Human

Ao3

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After her death, Emma wakes up in her home, unable to be seen or heard by anyone. She resigns herself to this lifeless existence until one day, two men move into the house she haunts - and somehow, they can see her. A ghost, a vampire, and a werewolf living under one roof, what could possibly go wrong? Being Human AU.

Rated T.

The Gardener

Ao3

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Emma runs every morning, and the day she runs through the neighborhood where Killian is landscaping turns into something so much more than a daily bit of eye candy. Based on a prompt I can no longer find that was something like “You run by my house every morning and I make sure I’m outside every morning to see you”. Modern AU.

Rated T.

Ao3

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Neverland Smut! Set between 3x07 and 3x08. Emma needs the reminder that Killian is alive and well. The fact that Neal is sleeping six feet away doesn’t matter. Neverland Renaissance.

Rated E.

Six Weeks

Ao3

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A Daddy!Killian one shot. Emma has been acting weird ever since they brought their daughter home. Not what you think it is. Cannon(ish).

Rated E.

Check Ups

Ao3

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A series of missing scene from 2x12 “In the Name of the Brother”. Emma keeps checking on Hook in the hospital. She just wants to make sure Gold hasn’t killed him. And that he hasn’t escaped. That’s it. She swears. Cannon Divergent: Missing Scene.

Rated T.

Pillow Talk

Ao3

Ch 1 2

A post-coital captain swan get talking which leads to some interesting discoveries on both parts. And some challenges. Cannon(ish).

Rated E.

A Woman of Action

Ao3

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Emma may not have been a woman of words but she didn’t need to be – not with him. But she was definitely a woman of action. A little fic about Emma appreciating her man. Cannon(ish).

Rated E.

#all my fics in one tidy little place #maddie writes #captain swan #cs fanfic #captain swan fanfic #cs ff

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ruki--mukami · 2 years

Note

So, how many official/unofficial ships does Ruki have on your blog? Just curious if you keep track of it...

I hope you don't take it as rude but I apologize in advance if it seems so.

🧩 Oh boy, there are many ships, both official and unofficial—Ruki’s more of a “you’re my lover now” kind of person rather than confessing normally 💀—but I’ll try to list them in no particular order without leaving anyone out. I apologize if I left anyone out as there are many relationships on this blog. (Edit: WOW there are far more than I expected, haha.)

Apologies for all the tags beforehand.

1. First off, we have Rukina (Ruki x Irina Avenel, @iricathel). These two have been interacting since pretty much the very beginning of my blog, honestly. And for those of you who saw their most recent thread, they’re actually going to get married!! I’m so happy for them!! She is the heir apparent of the Owl clan, a race Lina created and honestly outside of the ship her world is so vast and full of creativity, I highly recommend you check her out. At first glance, Irina looks like a queen who might be difficult to approach due to her occupation, sophisticated aura, and somewhat dominant personality, but Rukina has such a special place in my heart because after getting to know her, she’s actually such a relatable character. She’s dorky, kind in her own way, and very sweet when she wants to be. I adore this ship very much and they’re definitely official.

2. Then we have Rukas (Ruki x Lukas von Alischer, @princesscrownprince). If you love slow burn and gay awakenings, this is the ship for you. Heir apparent of the Vibora clan, Lukas approached Ruki one day on a whim insisting that they be friends since he looked lonely as always, but very quickly the Vampire found himself intrigued with learning more about the Crown Prince and his culture as a viper. This ship never fails to excite me if I’m being candid with you—most likely because it’s the most natural developing one on my blog yet. Probably because Estelle originally intended for Lukas to have a different love interest, but now we’ve both realized Ruki and Lukas just complement each other so well. I could talk for hours about these two because if you see our threads, they’re detailed and full of plot twists at every turn.

One of my proudest moments on this blog is when I made Ruki propose a twisted agreement just to get the Vibora off his back: if Lukas could complete a blank jigsaw puzzle all on his own, then Ruki would agree to be his friend. If not, then he wanted Lukas to give up on their friendship. Lukas, despite not even knowing what a puzzle was, used his Vibora seismic sense to place all the pieces together. But no, that’s not the end of it. This sneaky Ruki hid the last piece in his pocket for good measure. And guess what? Lukas still found it anyway!! He just snaked his hand in Ruki’s pocket without permission and completed the puzzle!! I’ll still never get over that, hahahahaha!! Goodness, their threads make me smile so much. It’s unofficial and moving at a slow burn pace but we’re gonna ignore the fact I’ve written like 40k words of Rukas smut with the admin LMAOOOOOO.

3. Next, we have Rukilett (Ruki x Scarlett Wakahisa @kindan-no-kanojo). Let me tell you that if Rukas is slow burn, then Rukilett just… They just burn, period. It’s tagged TW: Rukilett for a reason. Based on deception and torture, these two have honestly rarely had their sweet moments. Oftentimes Ruki finds one reason or another to punish Scarlett, who is a Ghoul, for things that are hardly her fault. It’s his sadistic nature, I guess, but I also mostly blame my lack of proper RP experience as Scarlett has been around since September 2021 (the month I began my blog). Nevertheless, I still root for this ship, though it’s clear she will only accept Ruki in her life once she exacts her revenge on him for everything he has put her through.

4. There’s also a budding ship as of late, Rukaria (Ruki x Caria Baris @cursed—requiem). Lin is a great friend of mine and there have been ships on this blog before Caria (Nokia – Ruki x Nova Blair), but she has decided to pursue Caria’s story since it’s one she has had in her head for a long time now and feels much better writing about this world compared to the previous, and I’m here to support that. However, Caria is the opposite from the sweet and somewhat timid Nova. Much like Ruki, she is a bit of a stoic academic who keeps to herself and is often critical of others. However, I believe it’s because they’re so similar in personality that Ruki and Caria will eventually find love with one another and develop into an official couple someday.

5. We don’t interact too often since my friend is still learning how to RP, but Ruki x Angelica (@dialovers-angelica) is also a budding ship. Angelica is hardworking, nice, and a bit too trusting as fate finds her with the same Vampire who took advantage of her kindness and bit her at school at least twice by now. Much love to the admin though, we mostly goof around in our own personal chats but I hope to write more with her one day. She’s an amazing friend.

6. Another budding relationship on this blog is Viruki (Ruki x Virek Sutcliffe, @crimson-mayhem). Much like Rukaria, these two characters share a lot in common, from their introverted personalities to their mutual interests in reading and soon enough puzzles once I get Ruki to show him the wonders of jigsaws AHAHAHA. Virek is a human with an awful past as an ex-experiment subject who doesn’t speak much at all and when he does, he will most likely retort with a topic unrelated to the original one, which often drives Ruki mad. It’s his personal goal to get him to speak more often since he recognizes fellow intellectuals when he sees one and finds comfort in his chill aura, as opposed to those with a more boisterous and outgoing personality like his brothers, so to him Virek is a nice change of pace in this AU.

7. Not exactly romantic just yet, but Ruki x Nunnally Sakamaki (@lured-into-wonderland) is starting to head towards that direction. This is one of those relationships where Ruki was brutal from the get-go. After taking offense to Nunnally’s request for culinary help, he bit her on the wrist at school. However, since she is technically a Sakamaki, Karlheinz apparently ordered her to stay at the Mukami manor for a certain time period despite her initial dislike towards the Vampire. Over time, as they spent their fair share of cute and merciless moments together, it seems she is starting to develop a bit of a crush on him. And vice versa as well. Recently Ruki asked that she stays with him in the manor even after the allotted time is up, and Nunnally has secretly wondered what it would be like to finally kiss him, which I can’t wait to write soon hopefully.

8. Speaking of ships that didn’t exactly get along on the right foot, we have Rustic (Ruki x Mystic Tsukinami, @mino-diabolik). Although Ruki feigned a bit of kindness at first, despite the latter accidentally breaking a window of his manor from fending off a beast, he took an opportunity in the greenhouse to convince Mystic into rinsing off himself only to steal a few bites against his volition. He’s a bounty hunter and a half-Founder, but even so, Ruki really said “this man is fine, I wonder what his blood tastes like” and took a chomp out of him, AHAHAHA. However, their threads after the first encounter so far have either taken an equally, if not more violent turn, or a surprisingly wholesome turn (see the McDonald’s thread that I still need to reply to). These two have a perfect balance of sadistic moments and more light-hearted moments which I absolutely adore. They act very intimately but probably in Ruki’s head, he considers Mystic something like a boyfriend despite never confessing, ngl. You didn’t hear that from me though.

9. Then we have a dear bestie of mine, @ana-darkcloud. Now, there are many ships here to list as they have a TON of amazing S/O OC’s. There’s the Witch S/O, Dream-eating Demon S/O, Vocaloid S/O, Magical Girl S/O, and a few I still need to reply to. And let’s not forget Ellen Wright (the painter), Azazel (the fallen angel), and Ellis Ravenswood who I still need to develop the plot further to take to any kind of “relationship” as they have just met. So far the most developed ships of these are Ellen, Azazel, Magical Girl, Witch, and Vocaloid, but I adore all of them very much regardless of how much I’ve written for one or the other. There was a recent plot twist with Ellen recently and I can’t wait to explore the yandere aspect of it soon. From here on I’m honestly just excited to see what other remarkable ideas my bestie has in store.

10. There’s also a more recent relationship in Rurena (Ruki x Serena Leblanc, @serenaleblanc). She is a human who is like the queen bee at Ryotei Academy but also has a side fashion business. The interesting dynamic I find with their relationship is that, despite her outward personality, she has a bubbly and sweet side which is fun for Ruki to interact with for sure. It’s also a bit sad because she has an eating disorder but since Ruki is like a master chef, I can see he might tend to her needs very well and perhaps even help her move on from the disorder altogether. They’ve had their share of sadistic and sweet moments and they’re an official couple.

11. Another recent development is Ruki x Josephine Ako, @thatonefrenchwitch. While neither of them have straight up said “I love you” much like a lot of the ships on this blog, they seem to lean more towards official than unofficial. So far it’s been fluffy interactions all around but soon I can sense that angst is right around the corner, ahaha. I love writing a good balance of both, though!! She is a very sweet witch and I think the concept of Vampire x Witch is very interesting.

12. A bit unofficial, but we also have Ruron (Ruki x Kuron @mukami-kuron-mrsadisticcat). Kuron’s locked relationship is with Kou, but I’m more than willing to explore the possibilities of Ruki x Kuron as well, ahaha. They make for a savage couple, honestly. Both possess a silver tongue and can joke around without the other taking too much offense (well, until it gets serious, that is—then all the sadism comes out and hell breaks loose 💀) but overall they’re great together from what I’ve written with Kuron so far.

13. Ruki x Estella (@yourlocaltea) is another dynamic I’m so excited to explore, and while they’re not an official couple by any means, I adore these two together. Sorry, but I’m biased: the master x maid relationship hits too close to home, HAHAHA. No but seriously, she’s very sweet, kind, cute, and honestly probably too good for him LMAO. He has treated her very, very poorly so far, biting her from the first meeting as well as a few other interactions that turned violent, but lately there was a cute snuggle scene and hair dye shenanigans that unfolded which I really adore. Ruki x Kira is also on the table too.

14. Another interesting pairing is Ruki x Shoma Komori (@komori--shoma). They’re more on the chaotic side, especially with her crazy relatives, but aside from the mockery and exchanged insults, they have their cute moments too. I’m excited to write more and explore their dynamic further!!

15. A platonic ship on this blog is Ruki x Cyra Abbas (@mariicake, @cyra-abbas) and I love these two, honestly. She shares many interests with Ruki and they even have a shared favorite author which immediately impressed the Vampire. They don’t fully trust each other yet per se, but I think they’re sweet.

16. Ruki x Maria (@veiledsagacity) is more of an AU type of ship but right now they’re mostly friends. Maria is also a Vampire but she hates her own kind, refusing to suck blood from humans she deems as innocent, which is the exact opposite of Ruki. Even so, they share similar interests in literature as well.

17. Ruki x Metsu (@metsu-san), another chaotic pair who haven’t had many romantic moments at all but lately he’s starting to slowly warm up to the shapeshifter.

18. Ruki x Yuuko Sakamaki (@dialoveryuukos), a daughter of Karlheinz who was forced to be with him in an arranged marriage but eventually the two end up falling in love.

19. Ruki x Ayame Sakamaki (@sakamakiayame), a daughter of Karlheinz and Beatrix who has taken a liking to the Vampire for his charming personality, and Ruki who adores Ayame for her surprising compliance with his voracious bloodsucking.

20. Ruki x Yuu and Ruki x Fiona (@misslittlefounder), two OCs who have both had some interesting interactions with Ruki that more often than not turn out to be sadistic.

21. Last but not least we have Rukijas, the worst self-indulgent ship on the face of Tumblr, Ruki x Admin.

Other than romantic ships, I’d love to mention the friendships and other relationships as well. Ruki and Saeclus (@the-timeless-founder) have the potential to be genuine friends without much of a transactional nature to it which is mind-blowing to me, then we have the sweet and adorable Kauze (@kauzebridgerton) who is like a son to Ruki, and Sunny Ogawa (@sunny-flower-spot) who lives with the Mukamis and has had her fair share of both cute and funny moments with the eldest.

There’s also Megan Star (@mchallwrites), a human turned immortal of Hell through what started as a crack vore thread, Rei Sakamaki (@reisakamaki), a female version of Reiji who challenges Ruki at games like chess for the fun of it and is out to ruin her father’s plan, and one of his teachers, Hana Gormley (@hanagormley).

Aaaand, I think (?) that’s all of them as of right now… but I’m proud of each and every one of these developments. Thank you all so much for introducing your amazing OCs to me, everyone. Each thread brings me much joy and I can only hope to improve my writing and portrayal from here forward! Much love to you all!! 💖✨💖✨ 🧩

#ruki mukami #mukami ruki #the admin speaks #long post

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blxckdragonfly · 10 months

Text

Love Language (Darkness Finds You Universe-- Prelude #0)

(Song: "Love Language" by Ariana Grande.

Warnings: Drama, Slight smut on the page.

Pairing: Chris Motionless & Lycia Winters "Pronunciation of her name-- Lai-shuh" (played Ana De Armas)

Synopsis: When Chris invites Lycia to Furnace Festival to see his band, Motionless In White play for the first time-- some drama unfolds between her and Ash Costello, which pushes Lycia into finally telling Chris that she loves him and... the attachment begins.

Word Count: 4,856

Spotify:

A/N: And we're back! I wanted to give you guys a prelude of what took place before the first piece I wrote with these two, which is Love On The Brain. I hope you enjoy it! Co-written with @blackrose-92! x Tiger)

I was so excited to be here today– Chris had brought me to Furnace Fest to see him and Motionless in White play live as well as walk around the festival and take photos of the different bands headlining today for Jeremy and Outburn Magazine. It was my first time ever seeing them live. I watched as Chris was putting on the final touches of his look, which was his black vest with a patch that had a black and white spiral, black jeans and his boots. His arms are covered in black paint, hiding his many tattoos.

Furnace Fest: Sloss Furnaces National Historic Landmark– Birmingham, AL. September 25th, 2021.

I wore a sleeveless black wash Metallica “Ride The Lightning” top from Fashion Nova, a pair of black ripped disco skinny jeans from PrettyLittleThing, and a pair of boots. My hair is up in a pair of space buns and I wore light makeup knowing that most festivals are known to be pretty warm as I stood at the side of the stage, watching Chris and the boys as they’re about to walk out on stage. I heard the excitement of the crowd as Ricky, Justin, Ryan and Vinny walked out.

Chris being the last to go out on stage, he stopped when he saw me standing there with a smile on my face. He walks over to me and places a soft kiss on my lips.

“Have a good show,” I whisper into his lips. He nods and walks out on stage, the crowd roaring as he takes his place and starts singing their opener– Disguise. As I’m watching their set, I notice a bunch of black and red hair blocking my view from seeing Chris. It was Ashley Costello.

I was confused as to why Ash was acting this way toward me and then it all made sense, when she looked at Chris– she looked at him like she was absolutely lovestruck. It lit a flame of anger inside of me. I step forward in front of Ashley with my arms crossed and a brow raised at her.

“What the hell do you want?” My voice came out icy and cold as I glance at Ashley. Ashley clears her throat and shifts on her feet, avoiding my piercing yellow-green hazel eyes.

“I just want to talk,” Ashley replies, her voice quivering slightly. I wasn’t sure if she was playing some kind of game to get under my skin or was she being serious? “About your relationship with Chris.”

I was taken aback by her boldness and immediately became defensive of my relationship with Chris.

“What about it?” I ask, suspiciously.

“I think you both should end it,” Ashley took a step closer to me, her nervous facade fading fast. “He deserves someone far better than you.”

I stare at Ashley in disbelief, my heart racing in anger. How dare she try and get in between us like this. She has no right to do this and I sure as hell wasn’t going to let this happen. I clench my fists and step forward, determined to make Ashley understand that I wouldn’t be taking part in any games.

“What makes you think he deserves someone better than me?” I ask, fiercely. “Do you even know him at all? Do you know how much he actually cares for me?”

Ashley took a step back, intimidated by my ferocity and my refusal to be intimidated. I have three brothers, I know exactly how and when to fight if I need to.

“I know him far better than you and longer than you,” Ashley says with a smirk. “And I know he deserves someone who will treat him right, someone who won’t take him for granted.”

I grew more and more angry, I stepped forward with my jaw clenching and I grabbed her around the neck.

“I don’t know what kind of game you think you’re playing and hell, I don’t care,” I snarl. “But if you ever, ever come near my boyfriend again, I will kick your ass.”

My words are full of fury and I can see that Ashley knew that I meant every single word. Ashley started shaking in my grasp and she put both of her hands up in surrender.

“I-I’m sorry, Lycia,” Ashley stammers. “I didn’t mean to cause any trouble.”

I wasn’t satisfied with her apology, I tighten my grip around her throat as my voice takes on a harshness and is full of warning as I speak. “This is your only warning, Ash. Stay away from Chris or else I won’t be as nice next time.”

Ashley nods slowly, not daring to look me in the eye in fear that she would be met with the same cold rage that filled the air moments before. I step back and cross my arms as I watch Ashley walk away, and in the corner of my eye– I look up and I see Chris, who had just gotten off stage.

I can see that his jaw was on the floor from what he had seen happen between me and Ashley as he walked backstage. He didn’t know how to respond.

I face him and take a deep breath before looking into his brown eyes and speaking.

“Look,” I confess. “There’s one thing you need to know about me. I’m extremely protective of the people I love– whether it’s family, friends or even my significant other.”

I see Chris’s face turn from shock to being frozen and I realized why he’s looking at me that way. I just told him that I love him.

“Are-Are you saying that you love me?” Chris says.

I nod my head at him and smile at him, my expression full of warmth and admiration.

“I am,” I murmured in a honeyed tone of voice. “I love you, Christopher Cerulli.”

Chris steps forward toward me and pulls me into his arms, overwhelmed with emotion and happiness that I finally voiced out my feelings that I had for him. He kisses me deeply, passionately conveying all the love he has for me as we embrace tightly.

The kiss felt like an eternity between us before Chris finally pulled away from me, feeling both relieved and exhilarated all at once. He looks into my eyes, taking in every single detail of me as I stand before him– from my caramel brown hair, to my yellow-green hazel eyes, to my tattoos like my red inked snake tattoo with flowers on my left outer forearm. His hands move to caress my face.

“I love you too, Lycia,” His voice breaking slightly due to the overwhelming emotions flooding through him. "I love you so much."

I smile back at him, feeling an immense sense of relief wash over my entire body as I close the gap between us and I kiss him again, tenderly as I wrap my arms around his neck and my fingers sink into his newly dyed blonde hair.

I lightly nip on his bottom lip and I hear a soft growl erupt from within his chest, making me giggle. Chris slowly pulls away from the kiss, a look of contentment on his face, still keeping me close to him.

“I can’t believe you actually said it,” Chris whispers in awe, referring to how I finally voiced my feelings for him. “Not just saying that you love me but also standing up for our relationship.”

I smile up at Chris before resting my head on his chest, hearing the strong and steady beat of his heart beneath my ear.

“You don’t have to worry about anyone getting in the way anymore,” I murmured softly into his vest as he met my lips in another passionate kiss.

“Aw, look at the lovebirds,” I hear Justin’s voice as I quickly break away from the kiss and I turn around to face both Justin and Ricky.

“Hey, shut up, you two!” I snap as I flip them both off. Chris steps forward and rests a hand on my shoulder before turning his attention to Ricky and Justin. I see him take on a serious expression.

“You guys should watch your back,” Chris says as he sees a mischievous look in my eyes, causing both Ricky and Justin’s eyes to widen in fear as they realize what he’s implying.

Ricky and Justin both realize their mistake as they see the look in my eyes. Chris wanted to say something more but he was holding back laughter at the look on their faces. After composing himself, he shot them a warning look before turning back to me.

“Hey,” Chris whispers softly as he pulls me close and presses a gentle kiss to my forehead. “It’s alright, I’m here.”

I smile as I nuzzle my face into his tattooed neck, I feel so safe in his embrace and it makes me feel powerful knowing that I can stand up for myself and not have to face the fear of repercussions.

I see Ricky and Justin sheepishly back away and look down at their feet as I hear muttered apologies to us from them as they scurried away. Chris chuckles as he watches them go, wrapping his arm back around my waist protectively as the other moves to comb loose strands that have escaped from the space buns in my hair in a soothing gesture.

“I want to hear you say it again,” Chris mumbles softly into my ear as he places light kisses onto my jawline, taking delight in hearing my soft sighs with each brush of his lips on me.

“I love you.” I whisper. “I love you.”

Chris grins into my neck as he kisses it softly. “I’m never going to get tired of hearing you say that.”

After the festival, when Chris and I flew back to his place in Scranton and I made sure it was okay with Jeremy that I could stay longer with Chris and take time off work, which it was, we couldn’t keep our hands off each other. Chris wanted me and he wanted to be as close to me as possible.

The moment the door to his house closed behind him, Chris pins me up to the door– kissing me with such a deep passion that it takes my breath away. Our lips move in perfect sync as I wrap my arms around him, my fingers moving through his blonde hair. He savors the feeling and the taste of me as his hands explore my body, our lips breaking away for a moment as his own drag slowly down my neck, making me close my eyes.

I can feel his heart racing wildly but even I know he wants to take his time with me, which he scoops me up in his arms, making me giggle as he carries me upstairs to his bedroom, laying me on the black pillows below. I open my eyes and I meet his loving chocolate brown orbs staring back at me. My breathing is sharp with excitement.

I promise it's the little things that you do

That make me wanna give it all to you

You know I do, babe

I bring my lips back to his, kissing him passionately as my fingers reach for the “Violent Gentlemen” shirt that he’d been wearing on the flight back and pull it up over his head. I see more tattoos that cover his body, including what looks like a haunted house that wasn’t finished yet on his chest and stomach. I run my fingers across his tattooed arms and down his chest.

He pulls me closer, his own fingers reaching for my own oversized Misfits tee and taking it off me, leaving me completely bare chested before him because I’d been too lazy to put a bra on underneath.

He notices that I have more tattoos that he’d hadn’t seen before. I have a pair of deer antlers with some flowers on my right side near my right breast and a fox on my left side close to my left breast. I hear a soft gasp in awe from him of how beautiful I must have looked with my tattoos.

I blush as his gaze runs over them, feeling a bit self-conscious to be seen this way, despite how much I’m enjoying this at the same time.

You soothe me

You hold it down with every word you speak, oh, babe

Baby

Been a minute since I had somethin' so sweet

He reaches out and brushes his fingertips over the antlers, the sensation making me shiver as he moves his other hand to the fox on my left side.

“You’re so perfect,” Chris murmurs as he rests his forehead on mine, bringing tears to my eyes over how sweet he's being. “You really are.”

He continues his trail down my neck, to my collarbones, the center of my chest where he leans down and takes one of my breasts into his mouth– making me let out a moan as his hand caresses my other breast.

I feel completely overwhelmed by the sensations as they coursed through my body, my back arching in pleasure as Chris kisses and licks my sensitive skin. He reaches for my jeans that I’d worn on the flight, unbuttons them and pulls them down to reveal my phoenix tattoo on my right hip. He kisses it tenderly before standing up and undressing himself, his eyes burning with desire for me.

If you're gon' keep speakin' my love language

You can talk your shit all night

You the medication when I'm feelin' anxious

That's the kind of shit I like

I take in the beauty that is Christopher Cerulli, the Chris Motionless, every tattoo that covers his entire upper body. My heart beat in my chest, he wasn’t just beautiful. He’s gorgeous. I understand why so many girls want him, because of how stunning he is. The best part of all, is that he’s all mine.

I bite my lip as he slowly crawls onto the bed, his eyes meet mine as I can’t help but feel a bit nervous, his brown eyes are so intense I feel like I can’t breathe. He moves closer to me, resting a hand on my face, caressing it as he notices my hands are shaking.

“Lycia,” Chris murmurs softly. “Honey, you’re shaking. Hey, we don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.”

I shake my head, taking a breath to calm my nerves. I know what I want, it’s right in front of me, looking into my eyes. I want him.

“Chris,” I say softly, my voice barely a whisper as I push away all of my doubt that comes up to the surface. “I want this. I want you.”

Teach me how to love you

I'm unlearnin' what ain't right

I want you to keep speakin' my love language

Baby, talk your shit all night

Chris smiles widely and leans forward, pressing his lips against mine as he kisses me softly. I respond eagerly, heart fluttering at the tender gesture, wrapping my arms around his neck as he deepens the kiss, his hands moving from mine to my neck and then down again before finally settling on either side of my waist. I feel something awaken in me and makes me long for more of him.

He moves lower on the bed, his mouth kissing along the curve of my neck before moving down to the phoenix tattoo that he admired earlier on my hip. I let out a gasp as Chris kisses the tattoo, his tongue tracing the intricate design and sending shivers of pleasure up my spine.

I feel myself melt into him as he moves lower, his hands lightly caressing my inner thighs and pushing them apart, his fingers find their way to my most sensitive spot and I feel a wave of pleasure through me at the contact.

Why would I double back or do the same thing twice?

A question, somethin' that I can't deny

Lеft my baggage at the door, I'll claim you mine

All minе

“Fuck,” I breathe softly as his fingers sink inside me, Chris feeling how turned on I am. He leans into my neck, nibbling softly on my skin as his fingers make circles inside me, the pressure and sensation growing within my entire body and it shakes as he continues to tease and tantalize me.

I gasp as his fingers move within me as my hips move into his hand as he looks up at me, brown eyes gleaming with desire as he watches me moan in pleasure.

I can’t help but let out a moan at the sensation and I feel myself on the brink of an orgasm. Chris smiles wickedly into my neck, knowing that he’s driving me wild with every stroke of his fingers. His other hand moves up to caress my breasts.

“Mm,” Chris whispers as he watches me while brushing each of my nipples with his free hand, making me moan louder this time. “I love the way you fall apart when I touch you.”

You soothe me

You hold it down with every word you speak, oh, honey

Baby

It's been a minute since I had somethin' so sweet, mm, oh

Chris moves his fingers out of me and replaces them with his tongue, exploring every inch of me.

My moans increase in volume and fill the room as I feel myself getting close. His tongue moves in circles around me, alternating between soft and firmer licks, making me squirm in pleasure beneath him and pulling the best sounds out of me.

My hands reach for his blonde locks, pulling on them slightly as I feel his teeth graze my most sensitive area. I cry out again as he teases me with his tongue, pleasure coursing through my veins and making my body quiver.

“I-I can’t take this teasing much longer, babe,” I breathe out between moans of pleasure. “I need you so badly.”

If you're gon' keep speakin' my love language

You can talk your shit all night

You the medication when I'm feelin' anxious

That's the kind of shit I like

Chris pushes himself up onto his knees and looks at me with a smoldering look in his brown gaze, he moves up onto the bed, crawling over my body until he’s positioned above me.

His hands rest on either side of my head, pushing back any strands of my caramel brown hair that have come loose from our embrace, he gives me a soft peck on my lips as he starts to slide inside of me carefully.

I gasp as he fills me completely, my entire body feels alive with pleasure as he moves inside of me. I wrap my legs around Chris's waist, my black nailed hands gripping onto his back as he looks into my eyes, his gaze is filled with desire and passion.

“God, you feel amazing,” He whispers as he starts to move slowly within me, each thrust sending waves of pleasure through my body, making me arch my back.

I moan loudly in response to the sensations coursing through my veins, each movement harder than the last and pushing us closer to the edge of pleasure.

Teach me how to love you

I'm unlearnin' what ain't right

I want you to keep speakin' my love language

Baby, talk your shit all night

Chris’s hands move to cup my face, keeping his gaze locked with mine as he continues to thrust, the strokes taking up a bit of speed but also remaining loving and intense, which takes my breath away as my black nails leave scratches up and down his back.

I feel like I’m about to scream out in pleasure at any moment as Chris took me higher and higher. I could feel my skin becoming hot and flushed as every nerve ending in my body tingled with pleasure, the sensations overwhelming.

My nails dug into his back as I silently begged him to not stop but rather take me further along this blissful road.

Chris responded with each thrust, pushing himself deeper within me until it was too much for me to handle.

I shiver underneath him as an orgasm rocked through my entire body, the waves of pleasure nearly bringing tears in my eyes. He increases his pace even more, his breath becoming ragged as he came closer and closer to his own climax.

Finally, when I thought I couldn't be able to take any more, Chris follows closely behind, releasing himself into me after a soft but guttural growl escapes him as he collapses onto me.

We both lay there, panting for a few moments before Chris rolls off of me and pulls me into his embrace as he wraps his arms around me protectively from behind, holding me close as I relax into him.

I smile contentedly and snuggle closer to Chris with my back against his chest, feeling completely satisfied from our lovemaking session.

“That was amazing,” He whispers softly while planting small kisses over my shoulders and neck, his warm breath tickling my skin. “You’re so incredible.”

My smile widens as I turn to face Chris, pressing a gentle kiss against his lips before pulling back and propping myself on my elbow to look at him, tracing the lines of his face with my fingertips.

Baby, pardon my French, but could you speak in tongues?

Never lost in translation 'cause you know what I want, boy

Treat it just like Givenchy (Givenchy), it's expensive to taste…

My eyes were drawn to the beauty of his face, his strong jawline, sharp cheekbones and soft lips that has moments ago kissed me in ways that no person has before, the same face that I’d watched before in multiple music videos, in interviews, seen in magazines and posters of him and his band, Motionless In White over the years.

I trace the path of each muscle until I reach his chocolate brown eyes that are now looking into mine intently.

In that moment, I feel like there's no one else in the world but just us, and it made my heart flutter in a way I have never experienced before.

Chris smiles warmly at me as he gently takes my hand in his and brings it up to his lips, planting a soft kiss against the back of my hand.

“What are you thinking about?” Chris spoke softly as his fingers gently trail down my arm with my red ink snake tattoo, his gaze still locked with mine.

I smile and move closer to him, my hands tracing the haunted house tattooed on his chest as I ponder his question for a couple of moments.

“I’m just thinking about how lucky I am that I’m here with you right now,” I murmured against his skin softly as I trace one of my own fingers across his tattooed jawline.

Chris smiles down at me as his lips brush against mine tenderly before he tucks away a strand of my caramel brown hair behind my ear lovingly. He presses his forehead to mine, letting out a content sigh as we both lay in comfortable silence for a few more moments before I decide to break it.

“It’s been a while since I’ve felt this way,” I begin, thoughtfully. “I’d never thought I’d find someone like you who could make me feel so safe and loved.”

Chris looks into my yellow-green hazel eyes, understanding passing through us both like an invisible wave before he wraps his arms around me tightly, holding me close to him in comfort and appreciation.

If you're gon' keep speakin' my love language

You can talk your shit all night

You the medication when I'm feelin' anxious

I smile against Chris’s chest as I run my fingertips along his arm lightly, tracing his many tattoos and feeling how strong he is beneath my touch.

“I’m glad I found you too,” He murmurs into my hair as he nuzzles his face into it, taking in the scent of cinnamon and blood oranges. “I haven’t felt this kind of connection to someone in such a long time.”

I look up at him with a soft smile on my lips before turning and pressing a gentle kiss against his cheek, finding solace in the warmth of his embrace. I rest my head back down on his chest and close my eyes for a moment as we lay there together peacefully, enjoying each other’s presence.

Chris notices the peacefulness that this moment has brought and I can see that he wants to take it a bit further.

“I want you to know something, Lycia,” He begins softly, taking my hands in his own and looking into my eyes intently. “You’re always on my mind, no matter what I’m doing, whether I’m touring with my band or even being in the studio or regardless of where I am. You make me feel alive again and I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

I smile wider as tears gather in the corner of my eyes from hearing such sweet words from Chris, words I never expected to hear from anyone, let alone him. I wrap my arms around him tightly in response before gently pulling away so I can look into his brown eyes one more time.

“I love you,” I whisper softly before pressing another gentle kiss against his lips, conveying all the emotions that I was feeling once just through that single gesture.

Chris meets my kiss with one of his own, full of both adoration and passion as he looks into my eyes and notices the sincerity behind them, a warmth swelling in his chest.

He presses his forehead against mine once more, sighing happily as he holds me close to him, not wanting this moment to ever end.

"I love you too," He murmurs against my skin, letting out a content sigh as we stay there together for what seemed like hours but was actually only minutes.

As we break away, I curl into his bare chest, feeling the warmth of his arms around me. I hear the strong beat of his heart under my ear and feel his fingers move through my hair.

Chris holds me close to him, feeling the warmth of my body as our skin brushes one another’s. His heart’s beating steadily and strongly in his chest and I know he could feel the gentle rise and fall of my breaths as I press closer to him.

That's the kind of shit I like

Teach me how to love you

I'm unlearnin' what ain't right

I looked up at Chris and our eyes met with a deep understanding. His gaze is so full of love that it feels like his very soul is pouring out through them. The sensation overwhelms me that a single tear runs down my cheek. I finally have found someone who understands me and accepts every part of me.

Chris leans down and gently kisses the tear on my face before pressing his forehead against mine, a soft smile playing on his lips. He wraps one arm around my waist and pulls me closer while his other hand runs through my caramel brown hair, pushing some of the strands from my face.

“You are my everything,” He whispers softly before leaning in for a passionate kiss. The kiss is full of warmth and promise as we both surrender to the feelings we are experiencing at the moment.

I feel like this is where I truly belong; safe, warm and loved in Chris’s embrace. We break away after what seems like an eternity but in reality lasts a few moments before Chris gazes deeply into my hazel eyes again.

“I won’t let go of you, I promise,” He murmurs quietly before tucking my head into his chest once again, kissing the top of my head tenderly as we lay there peacefully together until sleep finally claims us both for a little while before we woke once more and continued what we started before.

We continued onward, making love from the darkest of night to the earliest of morning light. I was exhausted, sore but I loved every physical moment that I shared with Chris, even the lightest touch of his warm tattooed skin under my fingertips lit a fire in me and I’m happy.

As I lay beside him in his bed, curled up in his arms with my skin against his, feeling his chest rising and falling as he’s breathing and his heartbeat. I love how innocent he looks as he sleeps with me in his arms, I run a finger down his jawline, making him stir slightly in his sleep with a small smile on his lips. His chocolate brown eyes open after a moment and he looks at me.

“Mm, honey. Can't sleep?” He murmurs and his voice makes my heart melt.

I smile softly at him, I shake my head no at him and bite my lip to keep the tears from spilling out from my eyes, overwhelmed with emotion by how much I love him.

Chris leans in ever so slightly and caresses my forehead with his lips before pulling back to look into my eyes. He brushes a few strands of hair away from my face tenderly, his thumb caressing my skin lightly.

“How can I sleep when I have the sweetest man to ever exist laying by me?” I whisper as I run my fingers through his short blonde hair, letting out a content sigh as he wraps an arm around my waist and pulls me closer to him, the warmth radiating off of him making it impossible for me to not feel safe and secure in his embrace.

Chris smiles fondly at me, his brown eyes twinkling with love and admiration as he caresses my face gently with one hand before leaning in for a passionate kiss that seems never ending; our tongues intertwining passionately while our hands explore each other’s bodies eagerly.

When we break away from each other, Chris presses his forehead against mine while he lets out a small laugh.

“I’m so glad you’re mine,” He says before capturing my lips and I happily obliged him, we kissed until we both have to take a breath.

I let out a light hum as I trace the tattoos that cover his arm, resting my forehead back on his.

“I’m glad I’m yours too,” I whisper. “You’ve made me the happiest I’ve ever been.”

Chris smiles at me and pulls me close into his arms.

"Me too," He says softly, nestling his head into the curve of my neck. We lay there for a long while in comfortable silence, only the sound of our breathing filling the room.

"I want to spend every second of my life with you," Chris says as he looks deep into my eyes.

I smile brightly and kiss him tenderly on the lips, feeling a warmth spread through me and a deep sense of contentment as I realize how lucky I am to have found someone like Chris.

I run my fingers through his blonde hair, playing with it absentmindly as I look into his warm brown eyes that holds so much love for me that I feel I could get myself lost in them forever.

I close my eyes and let out a contented sigh before pressing myself closer to Chris, savoring the moment we're sharing.

"I feel so safe when I'm with you," I whisper as I snuggle further into his embrace.

Chris smiles and kisses the top of my head before stroking my hair lovingly.

"Honey, I want you to always feel safe when you're with me," He said softly as he holds me close, letting out a satisfied sigh when I drape one arm around his body and nuzzle against him for comfort.

The two of us stay like that for a while, just enjoying each other.

"I never want this moment to end," I murmured, lifting my head so our eyes met.

Chris grins down at me and brushes away a strand of my caramel brown hair from my face tenderly.

"Me either, baby," He said softly before capturing my lips in a passionate kiss that seemed to go on forever, speaking volumes even without words about the love we have for each other.

When we finally break apart, I let out a content sigh before I snuggle against him again, letting the warmth of his body get me back into sweet dreams full of love and happiness.

I want you to keep speakin' my love language

Baby, talk your shit all night….

Credit to cafekitsune for the divider. 🖤🤌

#darkness finds you universe #chris motionless x lycia winters #chris motionless #motionless in white #chris motionless fanfic #i ship these two so much #Spotify

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tayzakharperez · 7 months

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Title: Breaking The Sound Barrier For You Date: September 16th 2023 (mentioned stay til the 23rd) Where: London, England With: Taylor Zakhar Perez & Nicholas Galitzine || @nicdcgalitzine Summary: Taylor's bright idea to start sending letters back and forth between him and Nicholas to keep their connection from filming lead to a text exchange of Nicholas asking Taylor to come over. Due to being around for Vouge/Fashion Week, Taylor accepted and went to see her former co-star, missing him since filming wrapped a year ago. Warnings: NSFW content, smut accrues

Taylor Zakhar Perez: That was it, after short worrying texts with Nicholas and Taylor was on a flight to London rushing over to meet up with the British actor. He was worrying over the way he was texting his friend and former co-star. He barely thought of more than just getting to him. So the moment the plane stopped, the taller actor was quickly getting his bags and rushing off the plane. He couldn't leave someone in need. The moment Taylor got off the plane he was already searching around for those familiar hazel eyes, pale face and the dark hair that used to be blonde for so much of their time together.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: arriving at the airport with an off feeling in his stomach, a mix of nerves and something else he wasn't fully sure of, all he knew was he had to see him. he had to see taylor right now and that's exactly what he was planning to do. standing off to the side, out of the way, on his phone with a black baseball cap on his head. he was just kinda browsing, scrolling through social media, just looking really, nothing special. texting a few people, still not anything major, just needing to distract himself as he waited for the other. nicholas picked his head up briefly looking off somewhere, kinda zoning out for a moment.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: As soon as he spotted a man, Taylor looked at him for a moment, and it was definitely Nicholas. Walking over to meet up with him, a smile across his lips as he walked up to the oh so familiar british actor. "Hey, buddy!" he said when close enough, pulling the slightly shorter into a big hug.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: up til he saw someone coming his way, he could feel his pale face start to heat up and then there was the voice and he felt his heart start to race. why was this happening? it all felt almost too much for him and there was surely no way could could speak back even if he wanted to. quickly pocketing his phone as taylor came in to hug him, hugging back, allowing himself to relax some in taylor's embrace. it felt rather nice. amazing actually. one hand rested firm on the other's back and the other gently rubbed the upper half. "taylor, good to see you," nicholas finally spoke. "we should get going, don't wanna be seen right now," he said quickly, as he glanced around for wondering eyes or cameras.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: Not saying a word as he pulled away, hearing Nicholas finally speak before smiling some, "Yeah, we should," Taylor agreed before gently nudging the other man and leading the way out of the airport, standing a bit dumbfounded as it just dawned on him. "Am I getting a hotel during my stay or..." he trailed off, not figuring he'd have to finish as looked over to his former co-star curiously.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: as the hug was broken, the brit quickly moved to start walking back towards his car with the other, til he stopped, turning to look back at taylor for a moment before rolling his eyes. "yes, you can stay with me. don't make a big deal about it, cretin," he spat before unlocking his car, looking around and quickly climbing inside. gently moving across to open the passenger side door and call out to taylor. "get your ass in already!" nicholas yelled in the best american accent he could muster as he put the keys in the ignition, foot on the gas pedal and started up the vehicle, just before putting his seat-belt on. one hand directs to the steering wheel and the other goes to the gear level. hazel eye focused ahead, ready to just drive off without much thought.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: Taylor watched for a moment as Nicholas walked away, there was a beauty there. Could have just been the fact they did so much together since working together, could have been the British charm, but it just brought a smile to his face. He truly missed him, more than he truly understood 'til this moment. "Alright, I won't," he spoke as he made his way to the car shortly after the other man. Stopping near the passenger side door, glancing around himself for any eyes or cameras finally til he heard Nicholas's voice and saw the door open. Hesitating for a moment, he quickly moved towards the open door, shoving his bags into the backseat and climbing into the car's passenger side seat. Once sitting comfortable he slapped the door shut with a sigh of relief as he buckled himself in. "Thanks for picking me up and letting me stay with you." He said simply before turning on something to play in the silence of the car, figuring his former co-star would be of few works during the trip to his place.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: the moment taylor got in the car, nicholas pulling the gear shift into drive and making a u turn he probably shouldn't have, whipping the car and driving away from the airport. maybe it was his mind rushing, but truthfully he just wanted to get home, he didn't want them to be seen. if they were spotted their would surely be talks of a reunion or filming a sequel which they all knew was highly wanted but fans and some from set. currently, he wasn't ready for that, currently the brit just wanted to enjoy some time with someone he's grown very close to. their connection on set was undeniable since they met and it showed with how their characters (henry and alex) came off so in love with each other. when taylor spoke, nicholas glanced at him briefly, not speaking before saying a simple, "of course" in his british accented voice. focusing exclusively on driving back to his home. ignoring that off feeling he still had that pushed him to reach out to taylor to begin with. then his thoughts and feelings were blocked by the sound of queen's singing coming through his speakers. "bloody hell, taylor! stop touching shit, daft!" he spoke out in a raising voice, gently slapping taylor's hand after touching the music. "did you wanna play something specific? small talk?" he finally questioned with a briefly grin crossing his lips finally as he glanced briefly over to the other, mostly keeping his hazel eyes on the road.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: Upon Nicholas slapping his hand away after turning on what he was last listening to, Taylor couldn't help but laugh, adjusting in his seat in the car. "I'm waiting for you to sing Bohemian Rhapsody now for karaoke sometime. They say that's a tricky one and only the most talented can get that one perfectly," he said, mostly teasing, but also he'd love to see him tackle it, if he was being honest with himself. Silence over took after -- maybe no singing like that today, but they had loads of time together still. When the British actor spoke up, dark eyes quickly looked up to the other man, catching his hazels briefly, causing another smile to take over him. Taylor was just a really smiling guy. "I was curious what you had one last but -- small talk is nice too. That is -- if you're open to it." He added the last bit, proving he took note of all of his behavior since they met up at the airport. He was a bit off. Could be nothing, but if it was, he at least wanted to let him know he noticed and was open to talking through shit. Could also be the fact it's been a while too, so it could just be nerves.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: what taylor said did bring the smallest of smiles to nicholas' face til silence over took them, focusing on the drive but also he wasn't sure what to say in the moment. that lead to his questions and then the answer he got back made him laugh a bit with the first and clearing his throat with the second. he noticed. fuck. for now -- there wasn't something to note. for now it was probably nerves -- no, it WAS nerves. it's been well over a year since they filmed together, now it was just reconnecting again finally. that's all it was. yes. his right hand tightening on the steering wheel, resting near the gear level between him and taylor. "too late, my time has come. sends shivers down my spine, body's aching all the time," the brit sang along with freddie mercury's vocals bursting through the speakers, not sure what to small talk about so.. he'd humour the karaoke thought even though they were in a car instead. moving his free hand towards himself as if he was holding a microphone and bringing it to his mouth to sing into. "goodbye, everybody, i've got to go. gotta leave you all behind and face the truth. mama, ooh (any way the wind blows). i don't wanna die, i sometimes wish i'd never been born at all."

Taylor Zakhar Perez: Another small silent spell til Nicholas was singing. He was actually singing to the song despite Taylor's joking tease. "Holy shit," he uttered when the British actor briefly stopped pretending he had a microphone. In this moment inside Taylor's head they were at a karaoke bar and Nicholas was on that stage, dressed in his current attire, bellowing out the song with an energy just truly unmatched. A talent that should surely be more into the music world than he was with only a single song. It briefly crossed his mind to join him. He smiled brightly, going the same fake microphone thing with his hand, eyes just fixed onto his former co-star. "I see a little silhouetto of a man," he started singing with his friend, grinning widely as he did such. Surely they'd join together for the next part. "Scaramouche, Scaramouche, will you do the Fandango? Thunderbolt and lightning, very, very frightening me. (Galileo) Galileo, (Galileo) Galileo, Galileo Figaro, magnifico."

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: he joined him and all nicholas could do was feel something like fireworks.. maybe butterflies just jumping in his stomach. why? he felt a joy and happiness wash over him enjoying this moment with taylor. singing together without a care if they were good, bad or sounds like drunks. they were having fun and that's what mattered. it was a moment that made the brit feel like nothing could take him down from this high of pure happiness right now. "but i'm just a poor boy, nobody loves me. he's just a poor boy from a poor family, spare him his life from this monstrosity." was this song really making this work right now for them? was this really all it took to make whatever came over nicholas earlier when first messaging taylor feel like it wasn't even a passing thought let alone figure out the feeling right now? apparently. surely they'd be singing this all the way home. only the younger knew this as it was his playlist after all.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: Smiles, laughs and a lot of singing filled the car. Nothing else really mattered and all he wanted to do was enjoy this moment. Taylor was having the best time he had in a while. He had a lot of good days, but this one was already at the time and he just got to London, just got picked up from the airport. It was rather early to already be having this much fun and calling it one of his top ten -- maybe actually top five, best days already. It'd also be a lie to say he wasn't curious, depending on the length of the drive, what was next on Nicholas's playlist? The things you can learn about someone from their playlist alone.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: there was another queen song, rolling stones, nirvana. iron maidens and something by guns n' roses that all played during the drive. nicholas sang pretty much all of them into his imagery mic or doing hand motions he felt fit the song. there was even a couple times he'd look at taylor, smile, laugh and even held his hand at one point briefly before they arrived at the brit's home. placing his hand on the gear shift again, grabbing the keys with the opposite hand, pulling it to park before unbuckling himself, kicking open the driver's side door and stepping out of the black coloured vehicle. nicholas then opened the back door, grabbing half of taylor's things, glancing at him before moving towards the front door of his house. locking his car before going to unlock his front door, pushing it open and tossing the bags he had on his shoulder straight onto the sectional, before turning on his heel towards the front door, still open for taylor. there was that feeling again, reminding him why he texted in the first place, making him wonder.. did he really want to do that? everything could change, they're friends, former co-star. possible future co-stars and he was just gonna let some sudden urge guide him this whole time? it was definitely possible.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: Taylor rather enjoyed Nicholas's playlist and they had the best time singing together, laughing and just pretending they were doing karakoe together somewhere over inside a car, looking like idiots, surely. When the car went silent and they arrived, he buckled himself and opened the door along with the other man, stepping out of the car, shutting the door and weirdly in union went to get his bags, grinning some seeing his former co-star helping this time. He could do it himself, easily, but it wasn't bad to see him help. Shutting the door as the lock sound of the car rang through his ears. Moving to follow the British one towards his home, hestitating a bit once he reached the front door. He just had to stop, take in the slightly shorter one's home. It was truly beautiful and to him seemed like something he could see Henry having if he wasn't a prince, living his well off writer dream -- minus the living in Paris part. Tossing the rest of his stuff aside like the younger one did, shutting the front door behind himself once he was in. Eyes now locked onto him. Silence falling, not a word said.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: for a moment, he didn't care, he was just staring, admiring the other, just seeing maybe if he was feeling something there.. in the moment.. nothing majorly but also maybe? was it feelings? lust? all he knew was he wanted it to stop. he'd regret this but nicholas lurched forward suddenly, hands taking hold of either side of taylor's face, connecting their lips and kissing him suddenly, wanting nothing more than to just taste him. fuck, it had to be there.. nope, it had to be lust. lust for his friend, lust for his former co-star, a sudden desire for a man when he's only ever been with woman. only ever wanted woman, now here he is kissing another man without much thought or care and he felt that butterfly feeling. relaxing some in the kiss, enjoying it and not letting himself think anymore.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: Looking to Nicholas with a soft smile in the silence, just not thinking anything of what was happening here. Could just be a weird missing each other and longing time moment. However, before he could think much, Taylor froze feeling lips on his, thinking this was all in his head. Not that he dreamed to kiss his former co-star, but there no way this could be real. He did move much, not a touch to the other man, not even kissing back, he was just confused, lost in his head and wondering if this was why he invited him over.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: quickly pulling back, clearing his throat and walking slowly away from taylor as if nothing happened, with a quickness in his steps making his way into another room of his home. going upstairs to the bedrooms, kicking open a door before calling out, "taylor!" he calls out as he stays up in the room, with a little sigh following. "bring your stuff!" he called out again. standing within a guest room, it was a blank kinda room, the walls of a light tan, the bed made of many white pillows, a white blanket and there was a bright almost white light current on -- from a ceiling light. there was a few small decorations to give the room some character being of black desk at the opposite side of the room from the bed and a black chair near it. there was also a small comfortable loveseat near the large white curtains for lounging in over just being stuck to the bed all day. there was also a television above the desk across from the bed, a nice view to watch anywhere in the room. the remote on the night stand where there was also a black and white lamp and two coaster for placing a drink down if needed.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: Standing their speechless, unaware if what happened was in his head or not before the call of Nicholas's voice brought him out of his head. Shaking the thoughts and memory of what just happened, about to come til he heard the second call, going to grab his bags and moving around the younger male's home til he found the stairs and moving up them. He felt his heart start racing and he wasn't sure why, maybe he was excited to see more of his friend's home as he hadn't in ages or -- ever. They were filming and it was always hotels -- mostly his. Now he was in Nicholas Galitzine's home. Finding the slight shorter Brit inside a semi-blank look but still very nice room, feeling he walked into a rather nice hotel as he walked inside. Setting his bags down on the small couch. "This is the guest room? I can only imagine what your bedroom must look like," Taylor remarked with a big tooth grin across his lips, so bright and genuine a bit of his gums was exposed.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: once taylor enters, nicholas shoves his hands in the pockets of the black hoodie he was wearing, smiling softly at his friend, seeing how he was taking in the guest room. a slight chuckle escaping upon hearing what he uttered. "you'd love to know, wouldn't you, darling?" he smirked some after uttering these words. "that'll be left for me and those i shag," he teased before walking past taylor, taking a hand out of his hoodie pocket and pat the other's back as he passed by him. "unpack, feel at home and enjoy your stay. there's a bathroom across from you. you saw the kitchen as you came here. laundry room is at the far end of the hall around the staircase and the living room is open to chill if you'd like," the brit starts, shoving his hand back into the hoodie pocket. "if you need anything, text or holler.. i've got something to do so.. i'll meet you in the living room in a couple hours or so?" he grinned softly before gently walking away towards his own room for the time being. something the younger one wouldn't admit, was the letters with the taller in the guest room -- he truly kept in the box labeled 'rubbish' however to him it was anything but. it was a nice memory. though he also had a few other things in there such as what he took from set and some pictures of them. so now he was just writing back to the last letter he got, surely taylor could wait til leaving to get it. he could just shove it within the american's belongings.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: Caught off guard looking around the room til he heard Nicholas's voice and smiled some, as much as he wanted to nod, he didn't, however he did, he really did want to see the other male's room. "Oh, okay. Are you planning to have anyone over while I'm here though?" Taylor couldn't help but ask, not sure where that teasing lead. As he walked passed, he could feel their shoulders touch and it sent a tingle through his body and he had to close his eyes for a moment and compose himself. A touch to his back and the American actor opened his eyes, focus on the British actor, but not speaking nor looking in his direction, just listening. "Wow, okay, thanks." The older man said, finally turning on his heel to see the younger male, brown eyes just not wanting to see him leave, not yet. Maybe that weird kiss was crossing his mind again, he thought it wouldn't, and how easily the other acted as if it never happened. "Yeah, okay." The slightly taller male stated simply, as the slightly shorter one walked out, but he couldn't stop himself. Stepping forward out the guest room to glance into the hall to catch sight of where his former co-star's bedroom was. He walked towards the door, not wanting to do anything other than listen, maybe peek if there was an opening, but he wasn't ready for more at the moment.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: nicholas left his door open a bit and he was just writing away, not caring, not thinking, a soft smile across his lips, not admitting how it was rather touching to him to do letters back and forth to taylor, especially when he was home alone and had days he left like he wanted -- no -- NEEDED people. he had his days of being lonely but not sure who he'd ask (or in his mind bother) to hang with. always hoping there was a text or something of someone who wanted him. the younger brit didn't have company much, he'd go see others normally so really not many even saw his room he just loved to get under taylor's sick and see react or question, it was a bit amusing to him. currently the dark haired male sat clueless to his american friend peeking in and listening to him. low music played it was some song by daft punk and nicholas hummed along in a low tone, not that he had to keep quite but this was just what he did.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: Watching the other inside with a soft smile, hearing the low music, his low humming and noticing him writing reminded him of the third letter he ever sent to Nicholas talking about how he was a good writer and hearing his voice through the papers. Brown eyes went from the man to a black box near the desk, by his feet and there it was. Labeled 'Rubbish' and that made Taylor smile more and he couldn't help but start thinking what really made him send those letters, texts and just reach back out. He wanted to know his the Brit thought of him the way he thought of him. Working together, hanging out, and spending so much time together in those few months and then it was almost over too soon and he was off to the next project. Messages and hang outs lessened to nothing and it left the older male thinking it they weren't even much of friends. Busy, he got, but nothing hurt some. It's why he jumped at it when the short man reached out to him to hang again. He hope for it since the first letter and text he caved and sent after a while of nothing. Before he could think he was pushing the door open a bit more, stepping inside and his eyes were locked onto the other male, but he didn't do more than step in and stare, wanting to be seen before doing anything else.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: writing and humming away for a moment til he stopped, not looking up, from the letter but he heard the sound of the door, a bit faint but it wasn't silent, and he felt the presence of someone -- taylor and it was clear, he was either curious or something crossed his mind and he came over called as told. nicholas gently put his pen down, getting up from his chair at the desk and walking up to the slight taller american actor. "taylor.." he started in a low heavily british accented voice, "i said call not enter. the shag thing was just.." he trailed off, shaking his head slowly before gently placing a hand on the other's arm. "no one's coming during your stay," nicholas assured, offering a warm soft smile to his former co-star, giving his arm a small squeeze. it was so easily forgotten, that random kiss, truthfully he just missed his friend, the company of someone and thus asked taylor to come. the butterfly feeling was just him being truly happy to have someone so amazing in his life again after ghosting and almost letting him go as after filming, nicholas dyed his hair from blonde do basically black and was onto the next project. calls and texts between them lessening greatly, which always made the brit feel terrible.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: Hearing his voice come out soft and low did always put a bright ass smile across Taylor's face, especially saying his name. He normally respected the rules given, not wanting to cause too much issue or stir but now he was just almost unable to stop himself. That little kiss Nicholas was almost ignoring, pretending it never happened so easily for some reason crossed his mind and it was all he could think about. Those soft full lips on his, everything scream inside him to act but he didn't, he froze. Call it regret bringing him in here, but here he was, half-ass listening but still smiling either way as he half caught all of it. His brown eyes looked briefly to his arm when it was touched and soon after squeezed before looking back to the slightly shorter male. Feeling his heart beating faster in the moment and the American jumped onto the Brit, holding on his face, connecting their lips and kissing him deeply, passionate but mostly with a need and hungry for him all of a sudden. All he knew currently was he wanted Nicholas Galitzine.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: the moment taylor's lips touched his, the young actor's hazel eyes widen, shock taking him over quickly, causing him to became a statue for a but if also felt kinda nice, not allowing himself to think and just accepting the kiss. soon he was kissing back in the same deep passionate manner, not fully matching the others drive and hunger for it. one hand move to touch taylor's hair, the other rest's on his back, gently moving up and down where it bends. nicholas wasn't sure what was happening, but he wasn't against it, however as his mind wondered some thoughts of what would happen between them crossed and made his stomach do backflips. not sure if he wanted this or to be more than friends with the other or not, but he didn't hate this.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: Not expecting to be kissed back, but this caused him to smile some within the kiss before gently pushing his former co-star down onto his bed, not allowing the kiss to break, as it got more heated. He gently removed Nicholas's hoodie, tossing it aside -- gently pushing his body into his. If Taylor was being honest with himself he always had a thing for the younger man, since he saw him on set. Seeing him made his heart flutter, but he didn't want to do anything til they got to know each other and the more he knew the stronger the secret feelings got. Now was just him seeing if there was a connection and mutual feelings. Without much thinking his hands move to touch the Brit's body, under his shirt, gently touching his hips, stomach and then his chest, before slowly moving back down in the same manner.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: there was a bit of a flinch as they hit the bed, without thinking or caring, nicholas helped get his hoodie off, grabbing onto taylor's face now, kissing him deeply and passionately, not allowing himself to think at all. feeling taylor's hands on his body caused him to moan a bit into the kiss, gently holding onto him with his legs, buckling his hips forward some involuntarily. desperately wanting to feel more of his guest in this moment, so much more. keeping one hand within his hair, nicholas moved the other hand down the other's body, feeling it through the fabric before moving underneath his clothing too, quickly moving his shirt up, breaking the kiss for a moment to toss taylor's shirt off before the brit was right back to kissing his american friend with his own hunger now.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: It did surprise Taylor some how into this Nicholas was, he didn't think he would be given how he acted after that quick kiss in the living room that was seemingly ignored now. Maybe he should bring it up after? For now his focus was the kiss, feeling the other male's legs on his waist and the little thrust caused Taylor to groan some into the kiss. Before he could do what he wanted to tease more, the kiss was broken and off his shirt went, happily going back into the kiss, feeling Nicholas's warm hand moving along his back now was just everything in his mind, causing another groan to leave the American into their heated makeout session.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: the kiss alone was almost too much, it was almost like he dreamed of nothing but this moment, but truthfully -- he just wanted to have taylor around, not caring what they did. he enjoyed his company a lot and it always made him smile. the sounds of his groans had nicholas briefly breaking the kiss again. "fuck.." he moaned out, trying to catch his breath some as he removed his own shirt quickly, sick of feeling the other's hands underneath but the fabric getting in the way. once again, grabbing the american's cheeks and pulling him back into another heated makeout session. left hand tangled within taylor's dark brown hair, his right hand gently feeling taylor's abs and there went another sudden thrust from nicholas into his friend's groin with his own, causing him to release another moan into their heated lip lock.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: Taylor wasn't sure what in him wanted to do this now, but he had no regrets. Nicholas was attractive and clearly playing hard to get and it always got to him and now he was going to show him how much it did. Then there was the swearing moan and it was everything the taller man needed to hear, going straight to his growing erection making him almost wanting to pin the other man down and take him right now. Once also shirt free, he immediately grazed his hands over the British man's bare chest, stomach and back, wanting to feel and touch it all without fabric in the way. Kissing back harshly, a little grunt and groan coming when he felt Nicholas against him again. Those thrust alone could do him in. Still kissing him, Taylor went ahead and moved his hands down to unbuckle and unzip his former co-stars pants, just wanting to feel him already.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: for the time being, he was all into it.. til the sound of his buckle and zipper and nicholas quickly pulled away from taylor, hazel eyes widened and looking visibly shaken. "no.. look.. i'm not.. i can't.. i've never.." he struggled so hard to speak before taking a deep breath. "you're my friend, taylor. we laugh, tease and have fun. i felt something when picking you up and that's why the kiss downstairs but.. i'm not sure if it's more than just a happiness or excitement having my friend around. i had no idea you had these feelings.." he trailed off, looking towards the ground, ignoring his lack of a shirt, open pants, crazy dark brown coloured hair and surely a bit of a hard-on. "even if.. we tried.. i've never.. you know," he hesitated, fidgeting with a ring on his left middle finger. very prince henry of him.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: When his former co-star pulled away suddenly, at first, Taylor figured he did something wrong, that was, til it Nicholas started to speak, very broken however. A slight smile managed to cross his lips. Gently stepping forward and taking his friend's hands within his own, rubbing the back of them with his thumbs as he looked into those sweet hazel eyes. "You did great pretending it didn't happen, almost had me convinced I made up that kiss." Leaning in to press a soft kiss on the Brit's cheek before pulling away, looking into his eyes again, gently grabbing a condom out of his pants pocket. "I got you, okay?" Taylor spoke, letting go of Nicholas's hands and seeing him play with his ring. Surely picked that up from set. "If you want to do this, I'll help you out. Tell me what works for you. When to go, when to stop. Only if you want to though." He spoke with confidence. Sure he might have just been friendzoned, but he knew what he wanted, who he was into. This younger, slightly shorter British actor who has a singing passion and played against him as a co-lead in an LGBTQ+ film, had his heart in many ways. It's why he started the letters after all.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: looking at him for a moment, a soft smile crossing his lips, allowing his hands to be held the brief moment they weren't. glancing down with a little nod, "it was a guess.. maybe there's something.." with taylor's reaction he wanted to make it open to something more even if currently, he only saw a friend yet the kissed and touch in a way friends don't really do, he was questioning some now. looking into the brown eyes of the american actor standing before him, slightly taller with sun kissed tan skin and a smile that always made even a small one cross over nicholas' face. "you want this?" he spoke in a low whisper, noticing the condom taylor had, before gently getting out of the rest of his clothing, laying back down on the bed, giving a little nod. "we can help each other," he said simply. nicholas felt his heart racing, but this could be from being nervous more than anything else. something about taylor's confidence however made him feel so ready for trying this. with someone he trusted.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: Gently stepping forward, removing the rest of his clothing and moving towards Nicholas, condom in hand, his brown eyes not once leaving the sight of the others, that was just too beautiful in his eyes and already had his heart racing like no tomorrow. Gently getting on top of him, moving in close to kiss him but not doing it yet. "I found myself into you since day one. I saw you and knew I wanted you, but I also wanted to know you first and now that I do, I'm into you more." Taylor admitted gently moving his fingers through the British actor's dark colored hair, feeling how soft it was. "We don't have to do anything you don't want to. Your comfort is everything to me."

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: looking deep into taylor's warm and welcoming brown eyes before gently moving a hand along his waist, slowly up his back before his fingers found his dark brown hair once again, moving within the curls as he listened to him speak. nicholas felt his heart flutter at the other's words. so sweet and genuine, just for him and this caused the brit to gently lean pull the american into a kiss. "guide me just.. be gentle," he spoke in a low whisper voice, as he's never been with a guy, so he'd have to start slow and get used to it all. with what he was told, nicholas wanted to see try with taylor, he trusted him and maybe something could spark from this, but at the moment he just saw his friend of sorts. he was about to sleep with his friend, but, still, this was his friend. gently moving a hand to open the nightstand near them before looking back into taylor's eyes.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: Taylor looked over the other male for a moment before gently moving in to kiss him in a sweet and gentle manner before pulling away. Moving towards the now open nightstand to reach in and grab lube from it with a slight smirk, holding back a laugh before closing it. He was just wanting nothing more than to make sure Nicholas knew how he felt and Taylor was so drawn to him, so crazy about him. After filming it was like he was unable to leave his mind. "I'll be gentle, just tell me when you're ready. Guide me for your comfort," he said in whisper before moving back down to kiss him again. He just wanted nothing more than to have this man all to himself right now in this moment. As he said this he gently prepared himself with the condom and lube he had, before tossing the bottle aside, not caring too much where it went.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: a shiver ran down along nick's spine but he let out a shakey breath he wasn't aware he was holding as he looked into those brown eyes, always so warm and welcoming before gently moving forward to gently kissing taylor, gently moving his left hand to run through the american actor's hair. enjoying a more sweet kiss for a moment before getting a bit more passionate and eager with it again. nicholas' right hand gently moved down along taylor's back before breaking the kiss. not speaking just remembering playing henry he gently pushed down along taylor's lower back to push into him. this was the go ahead to penetrate him, the go ahead to fuck him, but he still felt shivers in the beginning.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: That familiar push caused Taylor to smile before accepting the guide and pushing himself into Nic's hole with an easy as best he could, pushing right into the perfect spot inside of Nicholas. Wanting to hear the sweet sounds he'd make but also wanting to make sure he was still comfortable. To him, this wasn't just about sex, this was about being together. As much as he didn't want to admit it, there was feelings there for his British friend, had been since he laid eyes on him and grew as they filmed and spent so much time together on and off set. It's why he wanted this to be special, he wanted to be gentle and careful with the man slowly taking his heart, and he had no idea yet. Maybe after he could tell him.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: feeling taylor go inside him caused nicholas to freeze for a moment, a pain consuming him some before changing into a pleasure as he pushed in deeper and touched that sweet sensitive spot deep inside of him, causing nicholas to let out a shakey breath, adjusting to the new feeling before a low moan escaped. breathing out before gently locking his eyes with taylor's again, giving a little nod, unable to speak before closing his hazel eyes. allowing himself to just feel in this moment, enjoy the sensation he was feeling over anything else. he didn't want to think past this right now, he wasn't sure his mind would even let him at the shock of the fact he was being fucked by his best friend.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: Not moving til he was told, just watching how the British man reacted to everything and there was a beauty in it all. The way his face shivered and shook. The way his body moved, his face turned, all of it was just the most beautiful sight he's sense in so long. Once they made eye contact Taylor's heart started to race and then the nod of Nicholas's head was what he needed to give his first thrust into him. Moving at a low pace as he pulled out and pushed into him with a force, but keeping it as gentle as he could.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: once taylor thrusted into him and nicholas lets out a shakey moan, eyes closed, grabbing onto taylor as best he could digging his barely there nails into the other's back, as his head went back into the pillows through his moan. it was pleasant, new and maybe he liked it. once he opened his eyes again, he looked at taylor's lips for a moment then into his eyes. this was happening and he wasn't hating it, in fact, he wanted more, faster, harder. so another nod hoping taylor understood as he shivered through everything still, getting used to it all still. maybe there was something there for him.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: That moan was just a sweet sound to Taylor's ears and everything he wanted and needed to hear in this moment. Then there was another nod and he felt he knew what it meant -- to continue and pick up the pace. So he did just that, thrusting into Nicholas again before halting. "I've had feelings for you since day one," he uttered before thrusting again and again, each thrust getting harder, faster and showing his desires and feelings for the British actor since they met on set. All he wanted was a moment like this. Tell him everything in one way and this was the way for him, kissing and making love.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: breathing catching in his throat at the next thrust, coming out as a louder but shaky moan before wrapping his legs around taylor's waist, just not wanting him to stop as he pleasured him, pressing again and again into that perfect sweet spot deep inside of him. "fuck.. taylor," he moaned out, tossing his head back into the pillows of his own bed, body shivering for different reasons, arching his back up some to thrust into him as well to feel more fast, hard, sooner and his head felt like it was spinning. then he looked to taylor upon hearing his words, nicholas' heart fluttered some and as much as he wanted to answer, he couldn't. so instead he moved up to kiss the american actor deeply, one hand still moving and scratching along his back, the other moving through that semi-curly dark brown locks he's really grown to enjoy. each thrust being punctuated with a moan escaping into the heated kiss.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: Taylor kept thrusting into Nicholas, hoping he'd hear something back but the kiss was a good enough answer for him, gently moving his hands through his colored hair as he kissed him back in a deep and passionate manner. He wanted to hear the British actor moan his name, but he also almost didn't want this moment to end. Nothing could change, a lot could and he wasn't sure if it'd be good or bad. He knew what he wanted and he was taking a chance. Taking his other hand to grab onto the other's erection, starting to pump in along with his thrusts in a similar pace. Breaking the kiss to move down and press his lips onto the younger man's neck, kissing and sucking at his soft pale skin.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: each thrust almost sent nicholas into over drive, he was just so lost within his pleasures from taylor right now, nothing else seemed to matter. if he wasn't kissing him right now, the brit knew he'd be moaning so loud. he's not had sex this good in awhile, could be he's never done this before, taylor was his first guy and it just made it all the more special. then feeling his neglected erection grabbed was all he needed, plus the kisses and the sure hickies that'd be left behind on his neck, nicholas was officially gone. "oh god, taylor," he moaned out loudly. "i'm so fucking close," he moaned, almost painting at this point.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: Seeing the way Nick took to each thrust, each kiss and the pumping of his dick was all Taylor needed, feeling himself getting closer and closer. "Cum for me, Nick baby," he said through the kisses to the British actor's neck, pulling away after he was sure he kissed enough and sucked on the skin long enough to leave a mark. They weren't a couple or anything, but Taylor was making his intentions clear with his actions right now and marking the man he wanted to be his. Plus the beautiful sounds he made, he wanted to hear them over and over again, always.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: "harder, oh fuck" nicholas moaned lost in his own pleasures, gently rocking his own hips along with each other taylor's thrusts, his one hand pulling tightly at taylor's hair the best he could and the other digging his dull nails into the american actor's back as best he could. "fuck, taylor" the brit moaned out loudly as he reached his climax, cumming between the two other their stomachs with a shakey breath, back arching and his head spinning. in the very moment he felt like he was on cloud nine, not thinking, not caring and just enjoying this moment with the other. after he came off it, collapsing on to his bed, out of breathe and looking to his friend after what they just did. "damn.." was all he could muster out in the moment.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: Doing exactly as he was told, pushing into him harder, guided by his own needs and desires before letting out a moan of his own as he got to his own climax, letting himself cum inside of Nicholas. Riding out his own orgasm before falling onto the bed next to Nick. Taylor took a moment to catch his breath before looking over to the other man. "Agreed." He managed to say before smiling at him. "I just -- I was taking a chance because I um..." Trailing off to get his pants and underwear back on, in case this all went wrong. "I've liked you since filming started. I saw you and felt something, but waiting to see if it was something to worry about and not like lust because of your looks. It's why I'm here right now, it's why I entered or said anything and it's why I slept with you just now." Taylor said, getting it all out there. "If you don't feel the same, fine, pretend this didn't happen and let's stay friends, otherwise, we can try. We can take things slow if you want even." Moving to get close to the British one again. "I just really like you and it's why I really took on macaroons and scones. I knew it was challenge, and I wanted to impress for your birthday."

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: once his breathing slowed, nicholas got up from the bed to pull his clothing back on, holding his shirt as he looked to taylor as he started to speak. his hazel eyes focused solely on the american as he went on about his feelings for him. this caused the brit's mouth to drop open some for a moment before closing it and quickly pulling his shirt on. freezing where he stood, his eyes going right back to taylor as he felt his heart start to race, palms getting sweaty. originally he saw a friend, this was his friend, but after what they just did? it made nicholas question some of what he wanted with the other. maybe the butterfly feeling was what he thought? not saying a word, feeling himself get close to tears, and looking down for a moment before gently walking a bit closer to his friend and gently pressing a kiss on his lips, hands cupping his cheeks, engaging in a soft sweet yet passionate kiss. allowing himself to really enjoy and feel in this moment.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: something -- anything! Then he walked up and kissed him, which was a bit unexpected but also all he truly wanted. It didn't take much thought at all before he was kissing back, arms wrapping around the British actor's back, holding him close to his body as they shared their sweet lip lock. It caused the American's heart to race almost a mile a minute. He was living on Cloud Nine enjoying all of this with the man who truly look his breath away upon first sight, and had him swoon since they started connection on and off set together. Pulling away from the kiss, because his gut wanted him to ask. "So -- are we friends or...? I don't want to assume anything."

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: enjoying the kiss, not even knowing what to say til it was broken and his hazel eyes opened and looking into the brown ones staring right back at him. a soft smile crossing his lips before gently moving his hands onto taylor's shoulders, one gently moving to rub his back. "you just need everything spelled out for you don't you?" he shook his head before gently moving to take the other's hands within his own, looking at their hands for a moment before looking up into his eyes again. "just.. i don't want to make this a big deal, right now. take it easy and start lowkey as we get used to it all.. well.. i do. i think i just need that peace right now," nicholas explained, gently squeezing taylor's hands. "is that alright? we can be together, just downlow for now."

Taylor Zakhar Perez: "Well, I wouldn't say I need it -- I just want it," Taylor said with a big smile and a bit of a chuckle as he spoke. This was what Nicholas did to him, left him smiling and just feeling he could take on the world and protect Nick as well. "So, you're agreeing to be my boyfriend as long as it's not -- public yet? I can live with that," he was just smiling from ear to ear. "Take all the time you need to get used to it. I'd never want to rush you." The American actor said before moving in close to kiss his friend -- new boyfriend and holding his hands tightly within his own. "I should probably go back to the guest room and unpack."

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: giving a nod, with a smirk plastered across his lips as taylor spoke, thinking to call him a daft or a certin, but holding that inside. "yes, taylor, i will be your lowkey boyfriend as i figure out my sexuality and shit, okay? not exclusive though.. or, public as you said.." nicholas gives a little nod, before smiling warmly hearing how patient his friend turned new boyfriend was willing to be for him. happily kissing him back, humming a little into the kiss til he broke and his eyes were again on the other. "yes.. or.. you could bring your shit in here. i mean.. we're a new couple and they say theirs a honeymoon phase.." he stopped speaking sure the american knew what he meant. "you can stay for a week, then, i'd like to have my place back and send you that bloody letter," the brit laughs lightly, but the letters was a silly cute idea to him and it's surely what got the butterflies in his stomach and the feeling of just wanting to see what could happen with taylor.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: There it was, hearing Nicholas say he'd be his boyfriend was all Taylor wanted to hear and his heart was racing like a race horse. "Alright, lowkey boyfriend," he couldn't help but say it. Simply, he was obsessed with kissing his new boyfriend, lowkey or not. He was glad he'd get to enjoy all this time with him in their little bubble, enjoying the new relationship. "Alright, I'll get my bags, you can help me unpack and we can try to stop kissing and touching each other," he said with a chuckle before letting go of Nick's hands with difficulty. "Alright, a week and then we part -- til I convince you to come visit in America at least." With that, the taller actor left to grab his bags from the guest room bringing them into the younger actor's room.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: rolling his hazel eyes at taylor's outburst, but it was kinda cute, it was happy and the brit did like that for the other, he always has. as they let go of each other finally, nicholas found himself missing it already. definitely that new relationship honeymoon high feeling, and he looked to him, a smile still present across his lips and true happiness all over his features. "yes, do that because i'd love to kiss you again actually.. we can make love again later, if you want," he said just as taylor walked out. waiting patiently for him to come back where they could attempt to unpack but would surely be caught up in other things.

Taylor Zakhar Perez: Moving quickly to grab his bags and come back, kicking the door shut and getting into the bed, pulling his new boyfriend down with him, getting under the covers, turning on the TV and just looking into those hazel eyes. "I'm honestly so happy right now," Taylor said in a low voice before going to kiss Nicholas again. He loved the taste, he couldn't get enough. This was his dream, his hope and now his reality, so all he wanted to do was kiss the other male, and surely show his feelings in many ways during his stay here with him.

𝕟𝕚𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕝𝕒𝕤 𝕘𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕫𝕚𝕟𝕖: seeing taylor come back and before he could think to do or say anything he was pulled into bed, covered in blankets and cuddle up next to the taller american actor, leaving nicholas' heart racing. he was happy, excited and truly felt something here. "i'm happy too," he said back with a soft warm smile before kissing his new boyfriend back. the way it made him feel to kiss his friend, quickly going from unsure to right in a matter of time. having no idea he'd end up in a relationship from this visit, definitely not planning it. just a test kiss and a friendly hang out. he wasn't against more with how it all made him feel. the happiness, giddiness and the excitement. nicholas was truly happy to call taylor his boyfriend, even if for now it'd stay between just them til he was ready, another reason he was so happy and comfortable currently.

#para 📖 breaking the sound barrier for you #nicholas g 👬 hrh prince dickhead of wales #nicholas g 💋 there’s a rope attached to my chest and it keeps pulling me toward you #( Posting this late because work got to me. )

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