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#i hate backgrounds and i am NOT being brave about it i am actually being very whiny
medi-bee · 1 year
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safety-pin-punk · 11 months
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hey queer nd teen here i've been really interested in punk culture and the message drives me to tears but i'm scared of being called a poser because i feel like a coward
i hate cops and i think they should fucking die and the government is fucked and we have to look after each other. but i feel backed into a corner because i'm surrounded by family who would laugh at me and just wouldn't understand and i don't feel like i can Handle it but i Want to
as a shy and nonconfrontational teen with a shit ton of anxiety to boot i dunno. i admire brave hardcore punks who beat up cops and nazis but i Can't Be That
no need for a response but it would be nice
When I was a teen, I was told by my best friend that I could never be a punk. That I would never be a punk. But here I am. I was a shy quiet kid, and I’m still pretty quiet and prefer to avoid confrontations when I can. My point is, these things don’t prevent people from being a punk if its in their nature
Not all punks are the big tough punks who can physically fight those fights. Though they are a very important part of our community. But we also have plenty of disabled, neurodivergent, and chronically ill people who are just as punk, and even people who are just not into violence. They are advocates, they are researchers, they are community care takers. Being a punk isnt all about fighting evil. I actually think thats not the best way to look at it at all. Being punk is about caring for your community. And while ‘fighting evil’ is a part of it, there are a lot more things that entails.
If you truly want to be a punk, it seems like you are already going down the right path. You alluded to a not so great home life where it might not be the best idea to dress in alternative styles. You could always start with smaller, more subtle things. Or you can just wait until you can move out to start exploring that. Remember, being punk is more than just an aesthetic, and while the aesthetic may look cool, it is by no means a requirement to be a punk (honestly half the time I run around it cowboy boots and a flannel - in the winter I usually add the hat too)
You are a teen still. Growing and learning about yourself and the world around you. And so are your peers. Any teen who calls you a poser is being a jerk and doesn’t know all that much about the scene. Any grown adult that calls you a poser is probably a poser themselves who refuses to acknowledge that not every person comes from the same background. But I also feel like it’s important to tell you that what anyone else says shouldnt matter that much. Even if it feels like it does, if you let their words matter to you, you are giving them all the control.
Its okay to be young and not know a lot. Its okay to not dress alternative for any number of reasons. Its okay to not feel like you could go off and fight bad people. None of those things make you a poser.
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marshallsgirl · 8 months
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Don't leave part 2
Pairing: Eminem x Fem¡Reader
Warnings: 🔞 MATURE READ AT YOUR OWN RISK
Recommended song: The One - Kodaline
Author's note: I'm working on my graduation final project, that's why I haven't been so active lately. I wrote this and I don't know how I feel about it.  I may delete it later or idk. Hope you all enjoy it. I love you guys so much! Sending all of you a warm hug🫂🤍
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January 14th, 2006
It's pretty late at night. I'm watching the news when once again I have to run to the bathroom. I'm throwing up again. I'm feeling sick. I can't even explain why I felt like doing this but...I'm taking a pregnancy test. I bought one earlier this morning but I couldn't do it. I was too scared. But I'm doing it now. I can't be pregnant. I mean...it would be nice to be...No, I am not pregnant. That thing is going to be negative!
The news reporter started to talk. Maybe it got my attention cause they played a song in the background. An Eminem's song.
"Today January 14th at 5pm Eminem and Kim got married for the second time around their fifteen anniversary. Kim said to People Magazine: 'Marshall wanted to do it because it was our fifteenth year together from our original day we started going out'. They repeated their vows from their first marriage..."
As the reporter is talking I'm looking down at my pregnancy test and I found the word "pregnant". And I started to cry. I've been waiting a long time for this moment but it isn't how I imagined it. I just found out that I'm pregnant and that my baby's daddy is married again. Even knowing this I feel the need to call Marshall. But I can't do that. He's probably on his honeymoon right now. He is probably spending such a great time being a family again. I know he did all of this for Hailie's happiness. I know he is trying hard to put his family back together. I can't call him.
So I called Proof.
"Oh, you saw the news, didn't you?"
"No...I mean yes, but I'm not calling about that" I said trying to control my tears.
"Are u okay? What happen?" I could tell he was concerned.
"Well...I kinda need an advice, man"
"Why? What did you do?"
"Nothing...I just..."
"Hey, y/n you can talk to me. We're good friends, aren't we? I don't care what happened between you and Marshall. You and I, girl. We can still be friends"
That made me lost control of my tears.
" Yo, y/n what happen?"
"Man, I'm pregnant" I confess. "Proof, I don't know what to do. I just found out that I am and I saw the fuckin' news..."
"Wait what that...you pregnant? Is it..." he didn't finish the question
"Yes, of course it's Marshall's"
"Shit...you got to tell him, y/n"
I knew he would say that, but I was hoping to be wrong.
"No, I can't do that to him"
"You know him, y/n. If you don't tell him he is gonna hate you"
"I know he deserves to know but he just got married and I know he wants to be happy with his family"
"So? I mean, he can be happy with them and at the same time he can take care of your baby, his baby. I know he'll want to be a responsable dad. You have to tell him"
"Proof, please I just can't...I'm too scared"
"Y/n, I want you to hang off the phone and call Marshall right now"
I needed time. Maybe tomorrow I'll be more brave. But saying this to Proof won't work.
"Listen, I'm going to do a blood test tomorrow just to be extra sure. Okay? If it is positive I'll call him right away"
"If you don't call him by tomorrow afternoon, I'll do it"
"Please, don't. I promise you, I'll call him".
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The blood test confirmed that I'm pregnant. But when I tried to contact Marshall he didn't answered his phone. So, I called Proof and he planned a reunion for us at Marshall's studio.
"Y/n?" he said when he saw me. "Are u looking for Proof? He'll be here soon, actually I'm waiting for him" he added.
"He's not coming. It's me who you are waiting for. I called you but you didn't answerd so..."
"I'm married" he said rapidly
"I know, Marshall. I just need to tell you something important"
"Go on then. I need to go back to my family, you know" it was something weird in the way he said that, like it was something he had to say it to believe it. I can explain it, I just know him too much. But I didn't ask him about it. So, I extended my hand to him. Letting him know that he needed to grab the paper (the blood pregnancy test) that was on my hand. He read it and then looked at me shocked.
"Is this some kinda joke?" he asked. "Why are u doin' this?"
"I am pregnant, Marshall. And listen I just thought you deserved to know. Even Proof told me that I should tell you 'cause if I didn't you'll hate me forever". I started to say. "I know you think I'm doin' this 'cause I want us to be back together but I promise you I'm not. I would never do something like this to make you leave your family".
"You really are pregnant...How long? How are you feeling?"
Now I could tell he was concerned.
" I don't know how many weeks I am. I just found out that I am pregnant, so I have no idea. And I've been feeling sick"
"Let's take you to the doctors then"
So we made a prenatal appointment.
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"The baby is 7 week and 1 day!" said the doctor.
I looked at Marshall's face. It looked like he was counting.
"So, you got pregnant on november 2005..." said Marshall as we both realized that my pregnancy started on the day he left me.
"Which means the due date is September 1st" the doctor told us.
"Oh, a virgo baby!" I said.
"Is it just one or there is more than one?" Marshall asked. I could tell he was really curious.
"I can answer that next week. The next appointment will be an ultrasound appointment, okay?"
I saw Marshall's face lighting up.
"Oh my! Our first ultrasound appointment?" I couldn't wait for that. That's exciting! I'll get to see my baby for the first time.
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In the car on the way back to y/n's home.
"Did you tell Kim about me? I mean, about me being pregnant" I asked. I was really curious to know if she got a certain reaction. But "no" was the only answerd Marshall gave me.  "So, are u going to hide this from her?"
"I don't want to talk about it right now. Let's get you something to eat" he said.
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Time went by and Marshall finally told me that things were not good between Kim and him. He assure me that it had nothing to do with me or my pregnancy. Then he mentioned the word "divorce", but made it very clear that he wasn't doing it because of me.
"I'm really happy you are pregnant, y/n. But now it's not the time for me to be in a relationship" he said.
"Are you going to tell me what happened? It must had been something really serious. I mean, you got re-married and now just three month later you want a divorce"
"I trust you, but I really don't wanna talk about it. Can we talk about the baby?"
"What exactly you want to talk about?" I wonder
"Do you feel it's a boy or a girl?"
I really didn't know how to answer that. I've done all the things to predict the sex of the baby and it's pretty even. I mean, I got 50% girl and 50% boy. So, I have no idea.
"They'll call me soon to tell me my results on the last exams I did and they could tell me the sex you know"
"Are you going to surprise me?" he asked and then leave a kiss on my belly. We're both laying in bed. I was to tired to do the normal things I do like cook and clean. And Marshall volunteer to help me. I couldn't say no. For real, even if I say no he would probably throw me to bed and lock me in my room.
"Yeah, I'm going to surprise you. I don't know how yet but I'll do it".
"Okay, then I'mma go buy you something to eat. Any cravings?"
"Can you get me some donuts?"
"Yeah, I'll be back soon" he says and before he leaves he press his lips on my belly once again. "Love you" he added.
"The baby loves you too" I said.
"I love you, too y/n" he says letting me know that  he said it for both of us, the baby and me. He is driving me crazy. I don't understand him. And people say women are the complicated ones. He doesn't want to be in a relationship and that's why he is getting divorce. So, I think he comes to see me and do shit for me just because the baby but then he is telling me he love me?
"Hey! I said I love you, y/n" he was already by the bedroom door. I know he won't leave unless I say it back.
"Stop it! You are going to get me all horny and shit"
"You’re horny preggers, aren’t you?" he says walking towards the bed.
"I’m fat and horny. It’s disgusting."
" Nah, you could be 300 pounds I’d still do you".
Maybe it's because I'm hormonal but I'm touched and I start crying.
"You're so fuckin' romantic" I say
He sitting by the edge of the bed now. He is touching my belly. His touch is soft. I want to say that I love him. But, honestly I'm just to scared to do that.
"I feel it's a boy. And I can't wait to see the way you're with him. You're gonna be incredible"  he says "I love you, y/n" he assures me.
"I'm nervous..." I manage to say
"I'm nervous too"
"No, you are not!" I replied
"Y/n, I'm not divorce yet... The truth is I'm just waiting for that to be done so I can...so that we can try to do this right. You're my home and I'm sorry it took me a lot of shit to finally understand that. You've always been there for me. I've always came back to you, every fuckin' time. I was so stupid. I'm truly sorry. I promise you I'll never ever hurt you again. I won't leave you. I promise for as long as we're together, to never, ever put you through anything like that again."
"Marshall..."
"Wait, I know it's going to be difficult almost impossible for you to forgive me, but please try. Please, y/n. 'Cause I miss you a lot and I love you even more. You don't have to say it back, though. You don't have to say nothing at all right now. I completly get it". when he finished he got up and left the room really quick. He didn't give me time to express myself.
"I love you, Marshall" I said to the nothingness.
A moment later my phone starts to ring. It's my doctor. She started to tell me about my result and how everything was normal and that I need more vitamin C and then she said:
" This also tell us the sex of the baby. Would you like to know?"
"Yes!"
"Would you like me to tell you over the phone or..."
"Over the phone it's okay" I didn't even let her finish her question. I was to excited!
"Over the phone it's okay?"
"Yes"
"Okay, let me open it up...Alright it looks like you are having a baby boy!"
Omfg! I'm crying, now. Marshall was right! Oh, man I'm having a boy!
"Omg, thank you!" I manage to say
"Congratulations!" said my doctor before ending the phone call.
I couldn't wait to tell Marshall. I needed to surprise him. So, I figurate out a way to do so. I grab a white mug, his favorite mug actually (and it's not his but mine). But okay, it's his favorite. And I wrote inside at the buttom of it: "it's a boy". Then I prepared him a mixed berry smoothie.
He came back just in time.
"Here, try this" I said giving him the mug.
"What are you doing out of bed? Why are you holding my mug? What is this?"
"Marshall, just drink it! It's a mixed berry smoothie and...it has the sex of our baby!"
And just as I finished to say that he started to drink it. He finished in seconds! And as soon as he read what was inside, he ran to put the mug on the table and then ran back to hug me and lift me in his arms.
"Marshall, we're having a boy!" I got my arms around his neck. Enjoying that moment. I was crying but all happy tears.
"Yes! Oh my God, what the fuck! Life is crazy!" He kept saying this words. He was really happy too.
"God is so beautiful!"
"I told you! I knew it was a boy! I fuckin' told you!" He said as he put me down.
"Holy shit, I know that's crazy!"
He knelt in front of me and kissed my belly and then said:
"I knew you were in there the whole time. I love you, son"
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I made a tier list...
please make your own!! I need to see boomer nations opinions on our man!!!! I know the tiers are actually so vile so change them if you desire :)))
OK so my quick blurb on why they are their!! (working worst to best)
28. Identity Crisis #5 - HE WOULD KILL ME FOR THE FUN OF IT. It did bring about the most random rivalry between Tim drake’s fandom and boomer's which is very funny
27. Black Lantern - Oh no… he's back… like a boomerang. Ate his own son... RIP…. L skill issue
26. Sliver Age - Would actually call me a slur and say that I don't deserve rights. He would hate crime me and then solicit me for sex. He looks like he's wearing a dress… what a pretty lady.
25. Flash TV Show - EWWWWWWWW, he though he ate...
24. DC Online - He looks like he would punch me in face at a NYC bus stop
23. White Lantern - Don't look at me like that… stop. He's back from the dead like a boomerang?? Something about most of the New 52 boomerangs don't hit the same. the bride all in white :’)
22. Young Justice - Gave me the ick. You might be thinking... he looks identical to SS hell to pay, why is he down here?? Great question… HE WAS SO CREEPY TO ONE OF THE GIRLS IN YOUNG JUSTICE….. WHO IS A MINOR!
21. Injustice Movie - Just because your in the background… doesn't save you from this list!!!
20. New 52 - Ok he's kinda hot if you look through your peripherals…Why are you wearing skinny jeans… you millennial
19. Harley Quinn TV Show - He's fine… just fine. “We’ll stack out bingo… Boomer loves an older woman” NO HE MUST LOVE ME! I AM VERY VERY MATURE FOR MY AGE
18. Flash: Sins of the Father - Can you please stop talking in the 3rd person… you are starting to sound crazy.
17. Most Wanted - I know jack shit about him. That's probably because he is barely in a comic issues THATS NAMED AFTER HIM!
16. Flash Point Paradox - His fight scene actually ate. I'm a sucker for Boomer being with the Rogues. If cyborg can take his belt off… so can I
15. Suicide Squad 2021 - Wow they somehow gave him even less lines than his first movie. 1. He doesnt look like boomer. 2. His accent is so bad… and hes AUSTRALIAN 3. His acting low key kinda mid 4. They killed off two of the only OG suicide squad members they had on the cast 5. He dies in the first 20min and in the most disrespectful way
14. Suicide Squad 2016 - The only good thing to come from this man is the fanfiction he brought. THIS FUCKING MOVIE MADE HIM A CANON BRONY WHICH I CAN NOT FORGIVE. GET THIS OUT OF MY SMUT BEFORE FREAK THE FUCK OUT >:( Fuck him and pinky too, you son of a bitch!!!! (its not that serious lol... i just want him to stop fucking a toy horse... please guys)
13. This Goober Alien Guy - I know nothing. He just kinda showed up… and I'm not mad just a little confused. He looks like he needs a hot chocolate and a hug :)))) 
12. Lego Batman Movie - Low key an icon. What I would do to get my hands on one of these sets… I would come close to killing someone for it
11. DC Lego Super Villains - If he wasn't Lego I would propose (Shane Dawson style) Once again what I would do for the very discontinued Lego set tie in…
10. Batman: Brave and The Bold - Those cheekbones could cut someone. Why are you wear a mini skirt… take it off ;)
9. Suicide Squad (comic) - Yes I know he was drinking and driving but he's not real so it doesn't count!!! The beginning of the Boomer Mobile! THE GAP TOOTH DUDE!
8. Justice League Unlimited S1 - AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Ok the hairline is… bad…. But so is mine twin!! I LOVE THAT THEY GAVE HIM PROPER CLOTHES AND NOT RAGS DUDE
7. Agent of Oz - is this picture is my school profile pic...yes… and??HE'S COVERED IN BLOOD AND IM GIGGLING!!!!!!!!!!!
6. Stjepan Sejic's Boomer - Choke hold and choke me...  I want to hear his voice but he can't break his mewing streak…The ungodly things I would let him do to me
5. Dark: Apocalypse War - Constantine! Boomer! GIRLS! GIRLS!! ILL SLEEP WITH BOTH OF YOU!!! I was not expecting him in this movie so I started to freak out when he showed up DUDE. PLEASE LET ME SIT ON IT
4. Suicide Squad: Hell to Pay - I'm a ride he wouldn't survive… I DONT HAVE WORDS TO DECRIBE HOW I FEEL DUDE… I WOULD DO ANYTHING HE ASKED FOR NO JOKE. Dead on the floor
3. Justice League Unlimited S2 - The glow up in REAL... had me on my hands and knees as a 3rd grader… and still on my knees today. I have never wanted someone to fuck me in the back alleyway of a shit bar so bad in my life
2. Batman: Assault on Arkham - The one that started it all… he is the reason I am this way. no lube, no protection, all night, all day, from the kitchen floor to the toilet seat, from the dining table to the bedroom BUT GREG ELLIS IS PUBLIC ENIME NUMDER ONE. YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID!!!!
AND THE BEST ONE!!!!!!!! WE ALL SAW IT COMING
1. Suicide Squad: Kill the Justice League - I AM GNAWING ON THE IRON BARS OF MY ENCLOSURE!!!!!! He has it all, the face, the VOICE, the look, the character!!!!! It is hands down the most consistently good representation of captain boomerang out their… and its canon that's he has a big dick :D I would sell my first born to get one night…
Thank you all for reading this word vom, I am sick in the head <3
if any of the comic issues are off or something please let me know :)
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE make your our and tag me!! i need to see them <3<3<3
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saintsenara · 7 months
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Hi, if you're still doing the ask game, may I inquire about your opinion on the following ships ? : Tomarrinny, Bartymort, Quirrellmort, Petermort and Tom Sr/Cecilia/Merope. Also, thoughts on MoD!Voldemort or on how a meeting between Snape and Petunia would have gone ? Thanks !
thank you very much, @take-the-unknow-road-now for this wonderful selection of unhinged things for me to talk about. i am always ready for asks which inspire chaos:
tomarrinny
when she's eleven, harry's twelve, and tom is an immortal shard of soul? no.
when she's thirty, harry's thirty-one, and tom is back from the dead for some reason? absolutely. after all, why shouldn't ginny be allowed two orphans, as a treat? and why shouldn't tom be allowed two people who are clearly less good-looking than him to pay him attention? plus, two quidditch players will definitely be willing to do all the work, allowing him to achieve his true form: undying pillow princess.
but - in reality - we all know which way the power dynamic actually lies: tom and ginny are both harry's subs. let's hope that their ability to jointly write a poem has improved since the 'his eyes are as green as a fresh pickled toad' days.
bartymort
canon.
there has never been a man with a more flagrant daddy kink than barty crouch jr., and we all know that he threw himself onto lord voldemort's lap the second he arrived in his first death eater meeting. the dark lord advised him that he'd be physically chastised if this behaviour continued. unfortunately for him, that was exactly what barty wanted to happen.
the reason it burned out hard is because lord voldemort also has towering daddy issues. he is even forced to reveal what his real name and background is in an effort to make barty understand that sometimes he'd like to do something other than put on a double-breasted suit and pretend he's come home on time to attend a birthday party. (for example: 'hello son, i've come to pick you up from the orphanage' role-play.)
barty literally couldn't give less of a fuck. lord voldemort is not sorry when he gets turned into a soulless husk.
quirrellmort
lord voldemort - overcome with joy at being back in a human body after a decade - doesn't think through how awkward the aftermath of this will be, and spends the first night he's attached to quirrell's head directing him in a... let's just say... exploration of his anatomy.
quirrell is so pathetically suggestible that - from that point onwards - he can't get off unless the dark lord is talking dirty to him. but can you imagine how cringe trying to speak sexily to quirrell must be? (hey baby, what are you wearing? a turban which smells of garlic?)
voldemort simply pretends not to have heard when quirrell brings this up. unfortunately, all this does is make quirrell want to talk about his feelings.
lord voldemort is not sorry when harry kills him.
petermort
flopping. lord voldemort hates wormtail, because he betrayed a man to whom he would give his affections: james potter.
[seriously, he is a simp for james. there is no other explanation for why he insists that james fought him bravely when he turned up on halloween when we canonically know that what james actually did was run into the hall without his wand and then fall over.]
but don't worry. wormtail is getting some god-tier hate sex out of snape.
tom riddle sr./cecilia/merope gaunt
i'm going to answer this lightly, on the assumption that this triad is consensual.
tom sr. is getting thrown out of the bedroom within seconds. they're lesbians.
[he'll be fine. he goes for a little walk to sulk and ends up making out with frank bryce against a rose trellis. the four of them become bffs.]
and then our not-ship questions:
lord voldemort as the master of death
sounds like a lot of hard work, plus both of his parents keep appearing whenever he touches the resurrection stone to shout at him.
snape versus petunia
snape went round to speak to her about what a dick he thinks harry is (dumbledore told him to speak to her about the blood protection, he didn't want to.)
they fucked.
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civetcider · 12 days
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frankly i’d say anon is probably a terf themselves — an obsession with tme folk being uniquely transmisogynistic for not doing thorough background checks on every blogger on their dash just seems (a) inflammatory and (b) as though they want you to grow a dislike toward transfems. just my onion. terfs are getting wild with their ways of trying to subtlety recruit people
thank ya for the insight!! yeah i had never actually seen the term TME around before so i'm a bit ignorant about it i guess, well i appreciate the support from everybody haha! again i hate like whining about trolls and shit and yelling at dumb people in my ask box i normally delete it every time but this one in particular just made me extra mad i had to yell at them i HAD TOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am strong and brave
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krystalgazer · 8 months
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I just now finished Good Omens 2 (very late I know) and…look, I don’t like ending because I don’t like being harpooned in the chest, but I do think it’s necessary to go down this path and it was a brave choice.
Aziraphale is *incredibly* conditioned by Heaven and even after Armageddon he never lost it, which, I mean, for a human being brought up in a cult would be understandable, let alone a being who was within one for 6000 years. If he and Crowley are to have a chance to be together as they are, complete in each other without their backgrounds getting in the way, Aziraphale’s conditioning needs to be completely smashed to pieces. He needs to see Heaven for what it is with eyes unclouded.
I think that’s why Gabriel and Beelzebub got there quicker; as leaders they had to be aware of what their respective machines actually were to be effective in their roles, and that made it easier for them to realise what they found in each other couldn’t compare. Someone as low down on the totem pole as Aziraphale wouldn’t have the chance to know, plus doubt or questions of any kind were forcefully discouraged.
I’m hoping that the Metatron’s plan to neutralise Crowley and Aziraphale will backfire in his stupid smug face next season, with Aziraphale finally, *finally* seeing Heaven for the evil that it is.
Anyway. My point is don’t hate Aziraphale please he’s suffering too much already 🥺
Also I am forcing myself not to think too much about how devastating all this must be for Crowley otherwise I’ll spend the rest of the night crying and I have work in the morning
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organic-guacamole · 2 years
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this is a dumb excuse but last night I was showing my sister how to type with a Korean 10 key keyboard and then hit my phone stuck on it and that's why I'm late...
HSMTMTS SEASON 3 EPISODE 8 REACTION
yay jet doing the recap
before this disaster begins I just gotta say I love the background music at the start. the stringy rendition of shallow lake is so nice.
ON 3 OR AFTER 3!!!!! if this finale has any more callbacks I will not stop screaming
imagine if ricky did get a heart attack though...🤔
not saying he should but like, it would be original (unlike a certain recycled love triangle plot)
my best friend is old enough to vote now too and it's actually insane
but this isn't about me, BIG RED YESSSSS
how'd he come though, Ricky stole his car 🤨🤨🤨
JET
idk what's happening now, it would be cool if they fleshed out Jet and Ricky some more but they didn't so now it's awkward the way Jet is asking Red.
AND ASHLYN IS STILL JUST STANDING THERE? HUH? MOVE GIRL
EJ I love you.
"where's Gina" *punches pillow, mattress, wall, door-*
no wonder EJ his busting his ass to make sure the show is perfect. Ricky is the male lead and doesn't know the name of the kingdom in frozen? chile please
miss Jenn? do people not have other things to do in this show (me being petty about every little thing because I'm pissed about the storylines of this season)
why are all these elders jumping in the kid's solo smh smh
GO ASHLYN WEEEE
Channing showed up with like 20x more gay and he's so cute
why would they livestream this wth
shut up Richard, I'm so tired of his snarky comments this whole time
DUDE THE WAY THEY ALL TURNED ON EJ IMMEDIATELY I CANNOT STAND THIS SHOW
and then don't apologize for assuming he'd throw them all under the bus after the 2 weeks of him working so hard to make sure they excel I'm so angry I'm gonna cry
Nini? I'm not even surprised atp
she's not coming back.
"these things don't go away in a night" THANK YOU KOURTNEY
why is the crowd laughing so hard I do not understand (nitpicking)
thanks Channing 🧍🏽‍♀️
I know redlyn won't break up but it's scaring me.
not the sign saying no spitting in the middle of the emotional scene between Alex and Kourtney
SUPERNOVA GSHEGSHSHSAJBA I LOVE THEM
no Channing not now
why does Nini have to stand there, isn't it more conspicuous than sitting in the audience?
yes Gina beat that man to the ground
I LOVE KOURTNEY SO MUCH
I'm so happy rn.
bORN TI BE BRAVEEWE I KNOW WHO I AM INSIDE AND I WONT APOLOGIZE WOOOOOO
"we missed you so much this summer" literally no one thought about her (petty guac is back)
Channing is such a fun character, his dialogue is almost always hilarious
and now EJ has to witness THIS. seriously just twist the knife in his heart atp
I love Val why isn't she in season 4😔 (Actually no cuz then they'd ruin her character)
*marches down the path with lanterns and pitchforks* KILL CASH CASWELL KILL CASH CASWELL
EJ deserves so much more than they give him and I'm so upset that not only did he lose the girl he really liked, but also can't even get his dad to say something as simple as "you're not a disappointment"
seriously. born to be brave is just making me nostalgic for s1 and I can't handle that rn
Not Ms Jenn actually being in hsm, didn't Mr Mazzara prove that she wasn't? anyways um
just like that? Corbin switches sides? redemption?
why is miss Jenn pulling every 40 something man in this show
is it just me or does Ashlyn have the bi colours in her hair
EJ SIGNED AS ELTON IM SCREAMING
I hate the last day of camps like this, I've been to 2 and I cried so hard whole waiting for my ride, like those people you just spent days and nights with you might never see again but the bond is just so ✨
BRO LOOK AT THIS? WHEN THEY FOUND OUT NINI WAS THERE DID YALL SEE RICKYS FACE? HES NOT OVER HER (not in the sense of wanting to be with her still, but just not over that relationship and probably craving that feeling again. hence lily and now Gina? why why why should they be the rebounds for him and why is the narrative making it seem like a good thing.)
like this guy that has had his eyes on Gina and only Gina for months is not right for her! fine! but does that automatically make Ricky, the guy who is like the opposite of boyfriend material bc of where he is in life rn any better? no???
NOT THE TIME SKIP
I also just realized this is the longest hsmtmts episode to date, that's cool, literally what we've been begging for since s2 but sure.
no stop. that documentary is not complete within 1 month, no way. especially not after what they said about in a month the trailer will come out.
BRO CARLOS' DRESS??????
and can we talk about the meta-ness of this? what show am I even watching rn? hsmtmtsftmtd?
OMG EVERYONE IS SO HOT
"ok Ricky Bowen and you're watching Disney plus" *does the wand movement* ain't no way son
oh no it's gonna have the Ricky confession scene isn't it
oh jeez not the reality show edits
OMG WHY DID THEY DO THAT TO CARLOS IM CRYING
love how jet's own can't even be excused by some editing
this show has gone off the rails but the documentary trailer is killing me
the awkward shots of Ricky grinning at the camera while Gina says that she wants one thing I'm dying I'm deceased yes.
BIG RED IS BI WE KNEW THIS BUT ITS CANON NOW WOOHOOO (why he got an interview segment? no idea)
"good for him" so true
EJ my man... *shoulder pat*
oh Rina is still gonna happen?
hm
no jeez why is it always the girl confessing to Ricky
SHE DID NOT JUST USE PART OF HER BREAK UP WITH EJ TO CONFESS TO RICKY. IM BACK TO HATING THIS SHOW.
SHE ALREADY CONFESSED DURING THAT FLASHBACK SCENE AT THE S1 CLOSING WHAT WHAT WHAT
HES 18 TOO HOW COULD SHE USE THE FACT THAT EJ'S AN ADULT AND MOVING FORWARD AGAINST HIM WHEN RICKYS ABOUT TO DO THE SAME?? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHG
NO STOP ICKY EW GO AWAY
nonono, don't get me started
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desolationlovers · 6 months
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shrieking at the top of my lungs as high pitched as possible IM TIRED!!!!!! i dont want to be brave anymore im sick of trying my best and it not mattering!!!! i want to be held and cared about and not treated like a fucking background extra!!! im tired of feeling like i have the flu on my best days and feeling like i am physically DYING on bad days. always on the verge of vomiting Every Day!!!! and nobody ever fucking cares. im tired of wasting my fucking life at this stupid fucking job that works me to my bones breaking but the second i need a sick day i risk being FUCKING FIRED. i hate that i cant quit this stupid fucking job because what else is there around here!!!!!
and this Stupid Fucking Job feels like its actually Phsyically KILLING ME from the stress i literally feel like im a bad day away from a God Damn stroke and im SICK and FUCKING TIRED OF BEING BRAVE!!!!
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personaldiarysblog · 1 year
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I Just Gotta A Little Venting But Explanation On , About A Certain Somebody That Just Do Not Know How To Love. It's Envious That You Are Addicted To Hurting People But Not Having Sake To Actually Loving Yourself & Gettin' Along To Loving People. I Wanted To Actually Benefit From Being That Person Of Getting Hurt Because I Have Common Sense & This Common Sense Stays Real & Alive. I Hate The Fact That , It Just Gets The Best Of Me Each & Every Time. I've Loved This Person Since The Person's Baby Been In A Car Seat & The Deveastating Part Of The Story Is The Baby Has Autism. How Can A Innocent Child Be Born With That ???? I Could Only Imagine What People Would Be Going Through. I'll Leave How Met For Another Day But This In Advance Is Crazy & Something Should Be Done About This. I'm Tired Of Being Held Hostage In Abuse , I Wish This All Just Never Happened & I Never Wasted My Time About Things To Be About. Sorry Guys , I Had To Do A Little Venting & Expressing Myself. I'm Glad That You Guys Read & Understand Where I Am Coming From. I Got Tik Tok Actually Going On In The Background & Just Enjoying My Time So I Hope You Enjoyed Yours Reading This , Have A Nice Afternoon Just Wanna Keep The Word Day Out Of It Because I've Already Said "Day" Now I'm Saying Afternoon & Let's Keep Things Positive. Be Brave 😉😉😉 ..
#PersonalDiarysBlog #Venting #Explanation #Addicted #Abuse #Hurting #Loving #GettingHurt #CommonSense #Autism #GoingOnInTheBackground #EnjoyingMyTime #KeepThingsPositive #BeBrave #PersonalDiary #Blog
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comfortable-floof · 1 year
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I wonder if the fact that I kind of, withhold happiness from myself in so many aspects in life even to the point of the little things like the fact that I prefer he/they to she/her, that it bleeds into transphobia and general hatred in the way I see other people because,
I do actually notice I get irrationally annoyed when people correct me on the pronoun usage when referring to other people, in the "If I have to deal with this shit one mistake shouldn't warrant this kind of bitching, urgh." and... I really fucking hate that??? Like that initial thought is so nasty and unkind and, I don't want that to be me. I don't want to let my experiences of bigotry from other people shape me into a nasty person. I'm scared that it will. this is me being uncomfortably honest with myself, I think the fact that I tolerate so much stepping over of me, that especially to other enbies, I tend to me so much more nastier in my own head because it feels unfair that I (even though this is kind of self inflicted) never get acceptance so why should I hand it to others?
I feel like, even on the level of just for other people, my denial of the self isn't healthy. it's made me act and feel so much more nastier and I hate it. I think I might go ask a couple more friends to refrain from she/her and feminine coded language and lean more towards masc/neutral ones.
I'm also just really, really, really afraid, because the way I generally am and the things I enjoy are all fem coded, and there's a fair chunk of internalised misogyny here too, I feel like I don't '''deserve''' to be seen as an enby. like the things like fashion, makeup, etc. are all gender neutral, and I believe that, but I don't get why I feel like since I'm AFAB, me liking makeup and fashion makes me inherently more 'woman' than anything else but if someone who is AMAB likes the same, they don't have that, almost corrupting connotation.  I mean it makes sense why I'm so, like built-in terrified, I literally live in a place where I am in a lot of potential danger if not at the least ridicule if the wrong person found out. And my gender expression is far outside the binary which, the majority of people who don't understand, and a lot of times even if they are queer they still don't understand. I constantly joke about being 'still cis tho', and I think it's a big chunk of self hatred and internalised transphobia because I reaaally do not want to admit who I am to myself. I don't want me to be happy. With obvious regards to safety, I want to be more brave. Honest to fuck I don't want to be friends with people I'm not comfortable disclosing my gender identity to, because I would never tolerate that kind of treatment for my other trans friends, like no person is a friend of mine if they would discriminate against my other friends. and goddamnit I need to stand for that.  Today I woke up less depressed than I have in a while, and it does feel a little bit like opening the window and curtains to let a bit of sunshine in after I've been in depression cave for a while, and it feels good. I have clarity again and in a way, I can breathe again. and I'm willing to be kind to myself again. I have this dream, sort of, or well since I'm very very very stuck in my living situation which is, less than fun and very much not the indie coming of age movie with girl in red-esque music playing in the background with orange glowing streetlights casting a soft hue on two teenagers (one being me) talking about life and shit and being profound or whatever like since none of that is happening right now I spend a lot of my time imagining scenes like that... I have this dream of going to a pride parade with all of my queer friends, the funny gay people in my phone and some of the, albeit very very few but still, ones I've met in real life,I have a binder on and no one is judging me, I'm probably wearing an unbuttoned button up over it, and a pretty skirt, I've grown out my hair super long and I don't give a fuck what other people say about it, and I've braided yellow, white, black, and purple ribbons into both of them, wednesday addams style but waaayy longer, I'm talking hip length braids- and we're screaming lyrics to queer af songs and my stomach hurts like I've done ab exercises for a millenia straight because I'm laughing that hard, and my face and jaw is equally sore from smiling.
I'm, really, really, fucking depressed and suicidal a lot of the time but, I hope I get to live out the scenes in my head at least once, and at least a few of them, and that I finally think to myself:
"I'm. Fucking. Alive."
And there's the unspoken sentence of:
"And this feels fucking euphoric, and this is what living is, it wasn't the miserable, bleak, lie my depression tells me, nor what my tormenters prophesised, life is cackling with my friends until my stomach hurts, life is cuddles with the ones I love, life is reading good books when it's raining outside, life is worth it."
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goldentsum · 3 years
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━ thirst posts - idol! reader 
CHARACTERS: bakugou katsuki, todoroki shouto, kirishima eijirou, shinsou hitoshi, kaminari denki
GENRE: suggestive themes, crack
AUTHOR’S NOTE: finally, another bnha post-- my submissive and overstim fic on my bnha masterlist was lonely so i whipped up another bb HAHAHAHA UNEDITEDDDD
━ bakugou ♡
an angry boy that hides his feelings inside and in social media--.. he has multiple accounts that caters to different moods that he has, there’s the daddydom acct then theres the sweetbabyboi acct-- HE WOULD RATHER DIE THAN SOMEONE FINDING OUT HE HAS THE LATTER ACCOUNT
kacchan loves you because of the fact that you two were different but also similar, with him being angry and intimidating on the surface but a mess of feelings inside and with you being sweet and soft on the surface but a vixen inside 
DUALITY-! TODOROKI DOESN’T EVEN COMPARE TO YOU WHEN IT COMES TO DUALITY-! bakugou would fight anyone for you if someone calls bullshit on you. he would 100% NO HESITATION would deck someone-- 
he def has thousands of pictures of you in his phone and laptop, the ratio of pics of him and other things to you is outstanding,, 1:8 def
HE ALSO SCREAMED ONE TIME WHEN YOU POSTED A VIDEO WITH YOU SHOWING YOUR DUALITY--! everyone in the dorm thought he was angry, in actuality he was hyperventilating because you’re so hot-- also this happens so frequently, class A doesn’t even address it
bakugou: [SCREAMING IN HIS ROOM]
class a: lol, yall hear something--
[(y/n)ssweetboi]: hOW CAN SOMEONE BE SO SOFT THEN TURN SO SINFULLY PRETTY?? I’M SO ANGRY AND SO ATTACKED RN-!! mOMMY NEEDS TO CALM THE TF DOWN AND SHOULD JUST WRAP THE HOLY THIGHS AROUND MY FACE-! 
━ todoroki ♡
he’s basically the epitome of head empty just (y/n) 24/7 pls--
people would look at him and think, “huh, i wonder what goes inside that pretty head of his?” then todoroki’s brain just goes: “rAIL (Y/N) RAIL (Y/N) RAIL (Y/N) RAIL (Y/N) RAIL (Y/N) “
if someone has a mind-reading quirk, press f for them because of how sinful his thoughts are-- 
HE DOESN’T EVEN CARE IF ANYONE KNOWS HE’S THINKING OF LEWD THINGS! HE’S SO BRAVE PLS-! SO BRAVELY STUPID AND THIRSTY 
in his room, he has a wall and altar that is dedicated for you. all of your merch, the past concert tickets and bands, polaroid pics he got in your albums, and polaroid pics of when he bought the royalty ticket are all on that wall-- yall wondering how he has all that money to afford that? three words. endeavor’s credit card. 
this boy goes all out when you have a concert-! HE STAYS UP ALL NIGHT TO WAIT IN YOUR WEBSITE WAITING FOR THE SECOND THE PRE-SELLING OF TICKETS. he refreshes the site every 1 second pls--
shouto: [refreshing the site for the nth time at 3 AM] [clearly sleepy]
site: PRE-SELLING
shouto: [SHOOKEDT] [awake af] i AM SPEED-! CLICK YOU FU-
he’s also so cocky and boast-y on his account pls-! he’s so different in his main and irl 
[officially_(y/n)sbabydaddy]: i GOT THE ROYALTY TICKET-! AGAIN! you peasants can’t relate, huh. press f for all of you. i’m going to see my baby mama again <3 a little fact for yall, (y/n) smells really good <3 especially when she’s sweating 🥴 bet she tastes amazing as she smells <3
━ kirishima ♡
baby kiri is still a little shy about mentioning that he likes you and kpop but that doesn’t mean if someone ask him about kpop, he’ll act like he hates it or he doesn’t know. 
A CLOSET HARD STAN THOUGH
hard stan kiri goes HARD FR like his quirk and his dicc AND HE CAN’T BE STOPPED IF HE STARTS
he has you being pretty as usual as his lockscreen and got all giddy and happy when his grandmother ask if you were his girlfriend,, bet your ass that kiri said that you are-! 
inside his phone though, is a completely different matter-.. this boy has all sort of thirst pics of you! and he gets a little shy when he stares at your pictures for a little too long and makes eye contact with you in the pic LIKE HE WASN’T JUST THINKING ABOUT SOMETHING LEWD-! 
he and kaminari binge watches you and your group’s web series and THEY ALWAYS WATCH YOUR COMEBACK TOGETHER AND SCREAM TOGETHER
kaminari thinks kiri is a soft stan and tries to get him to join the dark side aka the hard stan side of twitter-- what kaminari doesn’t know is that kiri is on there already and also creates contents here and there 👀
kaminari: bruhh-! look at this edit of (y/n) as a demon-! 
kirishima: [looking at the video he edited all night] wow--
[rockhardfor(y/n)]: if you see something in my pants- PLEASE ITS NOT A WEAPON AND JUST MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS! i don’t wanna go through that again as i try to explain that a video of a queen throwing it back is the cause of that-- </3
━ shinsou ♡
HIM AND TODOROKI ARE THE SAME WITH HOW THEIR THOUGHTS GET 0-100 REAL QUICK-! LEWD THOUGHTS ARE LIVING RENT FREE IN THEIR BRAIN PLS-- 
also that tired look on shinsou’s face is not showing what really goes on his head bUT unlike todoroki, he gets conscious of his thoughts when he gets to the real nasty parts when he’s daydreaming as he remembers there’s people with quirks around him
shinsou: [thinks about you getting your guts rearranged by him] hehe~ <3
also shinsou internally: [realizes that someone might know what he’s thinking about] 002223444212487537924 lah la la la laaa! i’m thinking of rabbits-... yeah rabbits lol fluffy rabbits that hops across the garden- nothing dirty here. just pure innocent thoughts
shinsou also creates and reads fanfiction-- as soon as that bell rings, he would zoom zoom out of that classroom and into his room to read smuts
then he gets inspired and he stays up all night to write THE DIRTIEST SMUT ANYONE HAS EVER READ-!! the piece gets A LOT of hearts and comments and he’s PROUD PROUD
now he also has commissions for fanfiction and shinsou is getting money because of how perverted his thoughts are-! he’s also so talented in writing! HE LEGIT GOES INTO DETAILS SO PEOPLE ARE LIKE: “WOAH-!! HOLY WATERRR”
it’s a win-win for shinsou, he can turn his fantasies into stories and GETS money for it? bruh, fap material AND GET CASH <3
[(y/n)as_akittycat]: so is anyone not gonna comment on what (y/n) was doing in the background? KITTY WAS ON H E R KNEESS-!! bruh, kitty is flexible- ya’ll know what this means, right? mORE POSITIONS-! <3
━ kaminari ♡
this boy has no filter THEN HAS THE AUDACITY TO GET EMBARRASS BY IT-! LIKE AREN’T YOU THE ONE WHO SAID, “i want to fuck (y/n) so hard that her ancestors could feel it-” 
so are you not gonna do it? bruh, talk about empty promises- 
HE MAKES SHINSOU SHOOKEDT WITH THINGS HE SAYS AND THAT TIRED BOY MAKES SMUTS-! shinsou def uses kaminari’s lines in his fanfics pls whatta power duo
kaminari: i wanna shove my dick down in (y/n)’s throat and cum so deep, you could see it trailing down her throat--
shinsou: [SHOOKEDT] what the fuck dude?
also shinsou internally: wRITE THAT DOWN! WRITE THAT DOWN-! 
ONE TIME, he got too excited when you posted a video of your choreography wearing those tiny shorts and he short-circuited-- he really went: “wIEEE~” 
he’s cautious now not too excited, especially when he’s outside and you post out of no where
it’s also a miracle that his twitter account is still running with how erotic and lewd he gets in his tweets-- HE ALSO RETWEETS EDITS OF YOUR MOANS IN HIS FEED-! IN HIS MAIN ACCOUNT! HE DOESN’T EVEN HAVE A FAN ACCOUNT
he’s either REALLY FUCKING brave or just plain stupid. maybe both idk
[(y/n)k.denki]: have you ever just look at someone and go, “wow, i would really wanna fuck you hard right now” because i do. everytime i see my queen-- LET ME HIT (Y/N)-! I’LL BE GOOD I SWEARRRRRR
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tara-myra · 2 years
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There’s two things I love . Musicals and Miraculous (well there’s more but you get the idea ) So long time ago I created a playlist
Lila- World burn
« I wanna watch the world burn
I got the gasoline
I wanna watch the world burn
And everyone get mean »
This is THE song that gave me the idea. World burn fits Lila so well , That girls just want chaos . The song emphasizes perfectly her hate for Cady and I think it’s the same for Lila’s hate toward Marinette
« Cady, time to watch your back
Cady, time to turn and cough
Because you took me down
But you didn't finish me off »
I was actually almost disappointed when I realize no one did an animatic of this song with Lila Rossi
Marinette - Helpless
« I'm helpless!
He's mine, that boy is mine!
Look into your eyes
And the sky's the limit, I'm
Helpless! Helpless!
Down for the count, and I'm drownin' in 'em »
It’s just our girl being sooo into Adrien . I could totally see her sing that song . I know she is more than just a teen being in love but I find this song really catchy and joyful and that sort of match Marinette’s vibes . The other songs I thought of was «  Surface Pressure » ( especially after season 4) but I can’t really count it as a musical even if Lin Manuel Miranda wrote it .
Adrien - Dead mom
« Hey mom, dead mom
I need a little help here
I'm prob'ly talking to myself here
But dead mom, I gotta ask
Are you really in the ground?
'Cause I feel you all around me
Are you here, dead mom?
Dead mom
Dead mom
I'm tired of trying to iron out my creases
I'm a bunch of broken pieces
It was you who made me whole
Every day dad's staring at me
Like all, "Hurry up, get happy
Move along
Forget about your mom"
'Cause daddy's in denial
Daddy doesn't wanna feel
He wants me to smile
And clap like a performing seal
Ignored it for a while
But daddy's lost his mind for real
You won't believe the mess that we've become »
I couldn’t make it shorter this fit Adrien so well especially the «  Are you really in the ground , cause I feel you all around » Sweet irony …💀
Marc x Nathanael - Sincerely me
« Our friendship goes beyond
Your average kind of bond
But not because we're gay
No, not because we're gay »
I knooow there’re plenty other songs but idk , they kinda match the energy of this one . Also they like to invent and write .
Alya x Nino - Black-out
«Don’t make me laugh, I’ve been trying all night , You’ve been shaking your ass for half of the heights 
Real nice
You barely gave me a chance all evening
What
Do I get another dance
I’m leaving »
Honestly I chose this one for the voices , If Nino would have a singing voice it would definitely be Anthony Ramos . Also this part especially reminded me this couple . I feel like Nino is really possessive toward Alya because of his own insecurities ( as we can see in Rocketears) and I would totally see them arguing during a disaster with all the parisians people screaming and panicking in the background .
Zoe - Alyssa Green
« But your feelings have to be phony
Your weight has to be tracked
If you don't like shaking pom poms
You'd better learn to act
Just have everything perfected
By the time you reach eighteen
Don't ask how or why when you're Alyssa Greene »
I feel like it’s a song that could fit her especially considering the pressure her mom put in her shoulders to be someone else . It’s hard to chose a part honestly ALL the song fits Zoe
Félix - hurricane (The one from Death note and NOT from Hamilton)
« I’ll bring the pain
So be afraid
I will bring the power of the hurricane
Am the God of a brave new world
Much better than the last
The time for talking is finally in the past »
First ; Jeremy Jordan’s voice would have fit Félix so perfectly (again if the character has to sing). Secondly, It fit Felix’s god complex.
Chloé - Candy Store
« Honey what you waitin' for?
Welcome to my candy store
Time for you to prove you're not a loser
Anymore
And step into my candy store
Guys fall
At your feet
Pay the check
Help you cheat
All you
Have to do
Say goodbye
To Shamu
That freak's
Not your friend
I can tell
In the end »
Especially when it say «  Say goodbye to Shamu » I feel like it’s exactly what Chloe could have sing when she welcomed her sister at her school (and when she realized this one befriended Marinette Dupain Cheng)
Gabriel and Emily - Our love is god
«I worship you
I'd trade my life for yours
We'll make them disappear
We'll plant our garden here
Our love is God »
That’s exactly them . I feel like they would have this weird relationship Veronica and JD has . Gabriel himself said he wants to rebuilt a world for him and Emily . Emily is his everything.
Harry Clown - Gay or european
« (All)
Gay or European?
So many shades of gray
(Warner)
Depending on the time of day
The French go either way »
Now we all collectively agreed the clown banged Gabriel Agreste during college …
Bonus Chat Blanc dead girl walking
« I wish your mom had been a little stronger
I wish she stayed around a little longer
I wish your dad were good!
I wish grown-ups understood!
I wish we'd met before
They convinced you life is war!
I wish you'd come with me—
[J.D.]
I wish I had more TNT! »
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metalheadmickey · 3 years
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There are few fictional relationships that make me feel more unhinged than Mickey & Terry. And I’m sure it’s been dissected to death, but I think about their confrontation at the beginning of 10x11 a lot and it makes me feel extremely. So here I am to talk about why. CW: abuse and homophobia below the cut (I mean, it’s Terry).
I don’t think I need to give a history lesson here, but the abuse and violence Mickey endured by Terry’s hand unfortunately shaped a lot of Mickey’s life. Mickey didn’t take forever to be comfortable and open with Ian because he wanted to, he didn’t marry a woman because he wanted to, he didn’t live a lie for so long because he wanted to. This all happened because he actually, literally feared for his life. Additionally, there was the complicated fact of him starving and striving for his abuser’s approval. He wanted more than just bodily safety; he wanted to be in good standing with Terry. This is despite enduring what he described as torture. Terry “tortured [him] every day for years,” and yet he still desired a relationship with him. This happens sometimes in abusive relationships, it’s definitely not unusual that he felt that way. But it’s still hard to watch, knowing about their background and knowing that Mickey was aware of what Terry was capable of.
Mickey knowing what Terry was capable of is precisely why their interaction at the beginning of 10x11 made me go “yooooo” out loud at my TV at the end of the scene. I had to pause it, my eyes were bugging out of my head, I had to let it sink in, etc. etc. It really struck me hard. Mickey heard Terry shouting slurs at him from outside on the damn sidewalk where anyone could hear, and he put on an unamused look and stepped outside and walked right up to him. Terry pulled out a gun, and Mickey did not even flinch and instead pulled out one of his own. He listened to his father berate and then threaten him, and instead of backing down he proceeded to do the opposite of what he had done his whole life and deliberately said shit that would piss Terry off. And on top of it, he then went back into the house and started planning his big gay wedding with specific details designed to make Terry mad. He wanted to rub his happiness, his gay love, in that prick’s face. And he begins this endeavor with that line “I definitely love one.”
There’s an important detail in that exchange (“You must really love cock.” “I definitely love one.”) that is what ultimately elevates this scene from merely insanity-inducing to "Jessie will never be normal about this ever in their entire life," and that’s Mickey’s wording. It’s such a good comeback and it hits so hard, but it’s important that it also hits Terry hard. And it does, because he used language that Terry understood. I think if he had phrased it differently by saying something like “I just love Ian” or “I’m just in love” or something similar, it wouldn’t have landed the same with Terry. Terry had taken Mickey’s gayness and reduced it to something so base and vulgar because he hates gay people and doesn’t care to know shit about the gay experience. And instead of throwing his gay love in Terry’s face by using language that’s less horrendously offensive, Mickey fucking embraces it. Mickey takes Terry’s words and twists them to suit himself and throws them back at him. Mickey’s gay and he loves cock, and he definitely loves his partner’s cock. You know, his partner? Who he’s in love with? And gonna marry? Because the gay experience isn’t just about sex? Mickey’s not getting married because he wants to get fucked, he’s getting married because he’s in love. Terry doesn’t give a shit about all that and Mickey knows this, so his comeback utilizes language that Terry can wrap his head around, but he still manages to convey the fact that he’s in fucking love with one person. It’s affirmation and ownership and it is so badass. Terry was actively trying to be cruel and Mickey threw back at him in one of the most elegant comebacks I have ever seen. And yeah, we know Mickey is capable of being vulgar as hell, so it’s not like saying something like this is particularly out of character for him anyway. It just worked so damn well in accomplishing the goal of getting Terry to shut the fuck up while conveying to Terry and the audience that he’s in love and willing to engage in risky behavior to defend it.
I mean, he was doing all this with a gun in his face. Terry wanted him to feel fear, he wanted him to feel threatened because he genuinely thought that Mickey deserved to experience violence, and he wanted him to feel ashamed. But Mickey decided years ago that he was done feeling fucking ashamed, and he was so accustomed to Terry’s violent behavior. So whether he stood up to him with a gun in his face because he was desensitized to Terry’s violence or because he just decided to be brave and ignore whatever fear he may have been feeling in that moment, either reason speaks volumes. If he did it because he was desensitized to Terry’s violence then that really speaks to the tragedy of his upbringing. If he did it because he just decided to be brave in that moment then that speaks to just how much he was willing to risk for his principles. Either way, he could’ve ended up dead. We know this because Terry does end up trying to shoot him in the end. And yes, Mickey had his gun aimed at Terry, but I don’t know if I think he’d actually shoot him and I think his actions towards Terry in season 11 may speak to that. But Terry would shoot. And he does shoot later on. Again, he knew what Terry is capable of. And he stood up to him anyway and it was amazing to watch. Mickey used to be so afraid of Terry that he feared for his life while vying for approval. He used to live in a way that was the very antithesis of what he actually wanted for himself, just for his piece of shit father. And in this scene he shows us just how far removed he is from that fearful kid now, openly in love with his partner and standing up to his father in a way that will expressly make him angry about his gayness specifically, the thing that he was so tortured over in his youth. Tortured because he was hiding out of fear and the internal conflict that he experienced because of that, and then physically and emotionally tortured by his father once he’s found out. That abuse may have shaped his past, but he was ready to move the fuck on and not let it define his future. So this scene is just unreal. A neat little package of character and relationship/dynamic development in a little 70-second scene that packs an enormous punch.
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rivalsforlife · 3 years
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Phoenix Wright: The Truth Reborn: Oh No We’re Doing This Again
hi.
Nearly two months ago, I wrote an essay summarizing and making very wild conclusions about the second Takarazuka Musical. I did this about two and a half years after watching the first Takarazuka musical. As such I did not have the full context for many things from the musical and was relying mostly on my memory, which blocked many things from this musical for my own safety. However, just this week, I decided to rewatch it, because I enjoy tormenting myself. I said I wouldn’t write anything on it. Here I am writing something on it.
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Here’s the youtube thumbnail so that you know what you’re getting yourself into. And here, of course, is the link. This is the HD version which may be slightly more pleasant to watch. Maybe.
It was not quite as cringe in a funny way as the second musical to me, and therefore this essay may be less funny, but I feel like I’m doing a disservice to people by providing a summary of the second musical while completely neglecting the first. Quite possibly doing this is even more of a disservice. I just eagerly await the day that the third musical is translated because *that* will be the day that I finally shuffle off this mortal coil. Either way, I want to write this stuff down so that I never have to watch the musical again out of curiosity.
The following essay will contain major spoilers for both the first and second Phoenix Wright Takarazuka musicals, as I will be using many points from this musical to argue my thesis of the second musical. ... like you were going to watch them anyways. 
This one broke 8k. I’m dead inside.
Introducing The Director
Again another disclaimer that I don’t have anything against the actresses or the theatre troupe. I DO have something against Suzuki Kei, who I recently learned is the writer and director of all three of the Ace Attorney Takarazuka musicals, and is quite possibly my mortal nemesis.
This man is the one who brought this monstrosity into the world.
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This man, allegedly, cleared the first four ace attorney games *seven times* before sitting down to write these musicals. He played these goddamn games seven times and did not take in a single word. The man clicked through them mindlessly while watching a badly written legal romance drama in the background and got them completely confused. I genuinely have no idea how this man could have played these games more times than even me and yet managed to get so many characters (MAYA!!!!) completely and utterly wrong. This haunts me every day, truly.
This man played Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney, Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney - Justice for All, Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney - Trials and Tribulations, and Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney seven times. SEVEN TIMES EACH!! and was told to create a musical based on the series. He played these games seven times each and you know what he said?? You know what he said?? “This sucks, I’m getting rid of all of Phoenix’s backstory, butchering half the characters, and writing Phoenix/Lana fanfiction, but also rewriting all of Lana’s backstory so that she was Phoenix’s childhood friend, and you know what, I’m changing her name for good measure.”
I think this man played the games seven times each and then hated it so much and was so sick of it he tried to write something that destroyed as much of the series as possible while still being vaguely recognizable. And then somehow it became a massive hit because people like me see this and go “what the actual hell” and watch it, or people who haven’t played the games see this and go “wow what a great musical!” and then he wrote TWO MORE, destroying EVEN MORE every time in his wake, until finally, finally, he stopped after making Edgeworth straight and time traveling into the past to face off against a corrupt Gregory. I guess that was the last straw.
I have to issue a disclaimer here that for legal reasons this is a joke. I don’t actually hate this man and would not punch him in the face if I met him because that would be rude, and he is entitled to his wrong interpretation of the games. I don’t know what his thought process was. But allegedly he did play the games seven times according to the wiki. This whole essay here is satire and not slander and I don’t want to offend this guy if he somehow stumbles across my nonsense tumblr post. At the same time: Suzuki Kei blink twice if you need help.
Anyways half the reason that I’m making this essay is because I want to share my fake ao3 page for this musical. The other half will become apparent later.
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Sorry if that’s illegible because of tumblr quality it’s not really important. All you really need to know is that it’s a fake ao3 screenshot for the musical. Also in the author’s note I said he played the games four times but it was actually seven I just remembered wrong because I didn’t want to believe it.
at this point you may be like “Grace shut up and get to the actual musical” and okay, fine, let’s start this nonsense. Also note that I may be referencing things from my essay on the second musical very frequently; I’m not going to force you to go read that though because the fact that you’re reading this is enough of a torment already.
The Musical Begins
Unlike the second musical, this one opens with some narration from Phoenix.
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Transcript:
Phoenix: I’m reviewing a particular case at the moment. To me, this case... is one I’ll never forget.
Immediately I think this is important because it establishes that this whole musical takes place in a flashback that Phoenix is reflecting on. Why is this important? Because we know, by the time of the second musical which takes place three years later, Leona is dead.
Knowing that Leona is inherently doomed to die of her Sad Woman Disease paints this whole musical in a different light. It’s not Phoenix reflecting on how he got back together with his lover; it’s Phoenix dwelling on their past together, and the opportunities they had, before her life was so cruelly and inexplicably taken away. We don’t know if Phoenix’s reminiscing takes place before or after Leona’s death... but I wouldn’t be surprised if it was after.
Phoenix, still in the present, starts to sing. “A wave appears on the horizon like a mirage, it trembles, then vanishes. Your voice, carried upon the waves, fades upon the shore, erasing the splendor of the past.”
This line actually shows up in the second musical, sung by Lucia about her imprisoned fiance quite possibly. It’s kind of hard to tell what the meaning of these songs even are. They’re too abstract for me I think. But this line appears very frequently in the first musical when Phoenix is thinking about Leona.
Then we enter the flashback time.
Phoenix inexplicably yells at a newspaper saleswoman. This is not relevant to anything whatsoever. Then Larry barges in to the office, looking for Maya. Phoenix describes him as “A real trouble maker, but you just can’t hate the guy”, the latter part of which I think many people would disagree with. 
Well, afterwards, Maya comes in. Phoenix describes her like this while making exaggerated “can you believe this shit” gestures.
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Transcript:
Phoenix: She’s as ditzy as they come. Oh, and about the outfit... Apparently she comes from a family of spirit mediums. Try not to make fun of her, okay?
Suzuki Kei personally has it out for Maya and I can never forgive him for it. Maya in these musicals is here for pure comedic relief but it’s not even comedic because I just get so angry. How can you play the trilogy seven times and think this about her?? The girl who figured out DL-6?? The girl who told Phoenix to sacrifice her life in order to find the truth?? The girl who put on a brave smile in order to try and cheer up her younger cousin even after she saw her own mother murdered right in front of her eyes?? That Maya Fey?? Ditzy as they come??????
Ugh. Moving on.
Maya and Larry run off, leaving Phoenix to watch the American Broadcast.
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Important things to note here are the Godot mug, the little line up of what I think are the messed up little ace attorney figurines beneath the screen, and the fact that while this broadcast is supposedly from and to America the screen is actually not at all showing America. Like literally almost everywhere in the world except North and South America.
The broadcast says that Leona Clyde, age 24, was arrested for murdering the senator Robert Cole! Leona Clyde -- that’s Phoenix’s ex-girlfriend! He runs off to the detention center.
She is not happy to see him.
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Leona: Mr. Wright... I’m not the woman you once knew.
Let’s Play A Matching Game
Sorry for the abundance of screenshots that are going to be throughout this section. Phoenix convinces Leona to let him defend her. Some of the conversation seems... familiar.
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Leona: No one would defend someone who admits to killing a senator. I’m waiting for a court-appointed attorney.
Edgeworth: Every defense attorney I’ve talked to has turned me down.
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Phoenix: In that case, let me defend you.
Game Phoenix: Let me defend you.
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Leona: Don’t be ridiculous!
Edgeworth: Don’t be ridiculous.
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Phoenix: I’ll never accept that you’re a murderer. Let me prove your innocence!
Game Phoenix: Huh? Isn’t it obvious? I’m going to prove that Miles Edgeworth is innocent.
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Leona: I’ve already confessed my guilt.
Gumshoe: He confessed that he did it! In court!
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Leona: It’s foolish to think you can win this case.
Edgeworth: My case is near hopeless, Wright.
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Leona: (in response to phoenix offering to defend her) No you won’t! Don’t ever come here again.
Edgeworth: Look, just go away, and leave me alone!
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Phoenix: You of all people should know. Once I decide to do something, I see it through to the end.
Edgeworth: Once you start on something, you always see it through, don’t you?
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Leona: I never thought that you’d be representing me.
Phoenix: Ah, who could have guessed this day would come?
Edgeworth: Not me.
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Phoenix: You believed in me. You saved me. And this time, I swear... I swear I’ll save you!
Game Phoenix: Edgeworth believed in me, and I believe in him. I’m the only one who knows the real Edgeworth. I’m the only one who can help him.
I could’ve done a few more, but tumblr is already threatening to murder my laptop.
So long story short, Phoenix manages to convince his lover to let him be the defense on the case. Then immediately after swearing to save Leona, he starts singing a song, which I’m not screencapping because this is enough:
“As long as there are people in this world, there’s only one path I will follow! As long as there is love in this world, there’s only one path I will believe in!”
Edgeworth sings this in the second musical after saying that he returned to California because of Phoenix. Phoenix sings it now after swearing to defend Leona. You draw your own conclusions.
And then we finally get the opening credits. Eleven minutes in.
Just Pretend This Is Narumitsu Fanfiction
Following the credits, we see a beautiful beach. Couples (exclusively heterosexual, of course,) dance and embrace in the background for some time, before revealing Phoenix and Leona, in the Even Further Past, before the LSATs or whatever the ace attorney universe’s excuse for law school exams are.
Phoenix establishes his absolute hatred of change, an important characterization moment.
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Phoenix: The view here never changes, huh?
Phoenix reminisces on when they were kids. Leona’s parents were both lawyers (they’re both lawyers) and sometimes they would be like lawyers with her when she was a kid. This inspired her to also become a lawyer after their tragic death of Sickness. They never specify what the sickness is that caused two people who must be relatively young to die while Leona was in her early twenties at the latest. It may be whatever sickness claimed Leona’s life later. Sad Woman Disease. (Sad Man Disease for her father, I guess?)
Phoenix also talks about why he’s becoming a lawyer.
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Phoenix: Watching you chase your dream inspired me to become a lawyer too.
So, it’s not “my childhood friend looked sad in a newspaper” because I guess that makes no sense or is too gay or something. But this is another important piece of Phoenix characterization. His entire life so far has been focused around Leona. They’ve been friends since they were kids, and then Phoenix decided to become a lawyer solely because Leona was becoming a lawyer. Not even to try and get back into contact with her after she moved away or anything; just because he’s so obsessed with her that he wants to have the same career as her, then they can run a Mom & Pop Law Firm or something, years in the future, after years of happy marriage and a few children or like whatever the hell.
Well, there’s a few steps they’ll need to get to that. At this point Phoenix still hasn’t confessed his feelings for Leona. He does so here, on this beach.
Leona tries to protest.
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Leona: But I’m pushy, selfish, and only care about my goals... You’d get fed up with me.
Phoenix: That’s what I’ve always admired about you. That’s who I’ve been chasing all these years. That’s the only person... I love.
Sooo, Phoenix, your type is pushy selfish people who only care about their goals...? In the first, older lower-quality video translation it was “only care about my work”, too. Hm. Things to think about.
They sing a little duet together. Then we go back to present-day of what’s technically still a flashback. Whatever. Murder is happening.
Back To The Murder
So some plot things to establish: Leona is the legal counsel of Governor Miller, who is running for president in the AMERICAN PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION. After the flashback so that Phoenix has some time to change clothes, they show an interview of him talking about the murder.
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Governor Miller: I vow to forge a peaceful country with my own two hands, and to prepare myself for whatever may lie ahead.
Reporters: Through thick and thin, he’s a friend of the people!
The Takarazuka musicals are not very good at hiding their killers.
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Phoenix: Oh yeah... It’s almost time for the presidential election, isn’t it?
NEVER FORGET, WRIGHT. THIS IS AMERICA. LAND OF THE FREE! god what even was that line.
Anyways, we meet Gumshoe, who is incompetent once again. Maya runs around the crime scene, picks up the murder weapon, puts her fingerprints all over everything, moves things around, all while Phoenix is like “lol get a load of the world’s stupidest girl” or whatever. But who cares about that.
It’s time to get to the only valid part of this musical.
Edgeworth’s Gay Little Villain Solo
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You may have seen this one before.
Edgeworth arrives, but not really. It’s like Phoenix heard Edgeworth was prosecuting and immediately entered a dream-like state, where Edgeworth is heralded by the sound of trumpets in Great Revival. He’s played by a different actress than in the other two musicals, since I think she retired in between the six or so months from this musical to the second. She still plays the role well, though, or as well as can be when you’re written in an ace attorney Takarazuka musical.
Shrouded in scarlet solitude... it’s Edgeworth.
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Yes, those are six Edgeworths. Yes, they pick Phoenix up and carry him around and dance with him. Yes, it was probably not meant to be at all homoerotic.
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He sings a song that’s called “My rule”. I only figured this out later, but it’s loosely based on a “catchphrase” of his in the Japanese version - in game 1 he says something along the lines of “All I can do is get every defendant declared guilty! So I make that my policy.” In DD in his dramatic anime introduction before the trial, he says “I intend to question the defendant with all I have. For that is a part of my creed.” “So I make that my policy” and “For that is a part of my creed”, to my understanding, are both translated from the same line, which I think is like, “sore ga watashi no ruru”, “That is my rule.” (If I’m wrong, please correct me.) In this song he sings about how he’ll reduce all criminals to ash and such, basically talks about his game 1 prosecuting strategy as “my rule”. 
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It’s very fun and probably if you want to only watch one number of this musical, it can be this one. It starts about 26:10 in the video I linked.
Once the musical number is done, Phoenix and Edgeworth stare at each other, and the background fades into the courtroom, so court begins. I feel like I should note that Phoenix has not picked up any evidence or talked to any witnesses in this investigation except for Gumshoe, since Maya just moved some things around and then Phoenix had some weird fever dream about Edgeworth which presumably took up the rest of the day.
The Trial, Day 1
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Edgeworth: Consider it a prelude to the poignant Greek tragedy that’s about to unfold.
Maya: The real tragedy’s your pompous attitude!
Those are the only screenshots I took of this trial day. Here’s a summary, though:
The trial starts off with Leona confessing, Phoenix says “no I think she’s innocent”, and since ace attorney doesn’t care about the defendant’s wishes he’s allowed to proceed. For some reason Leona lets him do this without complaint. 
Gumshoe is the first witness, he claims to have caught Leona red-handed at the scene of the crime, standing over the corpse. Phoenix tries to claim that since Gumshoe didn’t see Leona committing the crime, he didn’t actually catch her red-handed, to which Edgeworth responds “What do you think being caught red-handed means?” 
Once Gumshoe is dismissed, Lotta takes the stand. She has a photo of the actual moment of the crime, where Leona is holding a knife in the air in front of the victim. 
The Takarazuka musicals like to do this thing where the image is blurry and zoomed out, but then Phoenix will go “I’VE NOTICED A CONTRADICTION” and it zooms in really far as the resolution increases drastically in order to show you the contradiction that is impossible to spot for yourself, because they don’t want people figuring out the mystery in this musical based off of a video game where you have to solve the mystery yourself. Anyways Phoenix zooms in on this photo and sees that there’s blood on Leona’s hand, presumably before she stabbed the victim. How did it get there?
Edgeworth suggests the victim was stabbed multiple times. Phoenix says the autopsy report contradicts that. Edgeworth, uncharacteristically, does not update it to suit his argument. 
Phoenix concludes that this photo is not showing the moment Leona stabbed the victim, but the moment Leona removed the knife! ... Which somehow casts doubt on her having been the one to stab the victim. Because as everyone knows, anyone wanting to kill someone would never remove a knife, it’s not like they’d bleed out faster that way, or anything.
And this whole contradiction is confusing because presumably if the victim was stabbed and then the knife was removed, they’d know that happened, because then the knife would not be found stuck in the victim’s body, since the victim was only stabbed once. So this shouldn’t be news to the prosecution that someone removed the knife after stabbing. But the investigation was headed by the most incompetent version of Gumshoe ever, so. sure. I guess no one knew.
That at least manages to extend the trial another day.
This Totally Has To Be Illegal
After the trial, Phoenix goes to talk to Governor Miller, aka Mr. Totally The Real Killer. Phoenix asks him why he decided to hire Leona as his legal advisor.
Basically, it’s because her parents were both renowned lawyers. Her father was a Chief Prosecutor, and her mother was a defense attorney. ... a prosecutor and a defense attorney couple... who does that remind us of...
Phoenix points out that just because her parents were good lawyers, it doesn’t mean she’d necessarily be one. Miller says that, sure, but she is actually really talented, and her law school marks were spectacular. Phoenix says “WHY WERE YOU LOOKING AT HER LAW SCHOOL MARKS”, like it’s somehow? suspicious? for a government official hiring legal counsel to look at their law school marks?
Apparently it IS suspicious because Governor Miller freaks out and asks if this is an interrogation. Before Phoenix can press much further, he gets a phone call, and leaves Phoenix alone in a big room.
So naturally Phoenix behaves like a fully grown adult running a law firm.
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If all he did was sit in the chair, lift up a desk lamp, and poke his finger on a pen, that’s one thing. But then he leans over, OPENS THE GOVERNOR’S DESK DRAWER, and finds a knife that’s just sitting there casually. It looks like a butter knife. It’s not anything major. Maybe the dude just wanted to butter his toast?
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I mean I know Phoenix will dig around in stuff whenever in the games, but he has no reason to suspect Governor Miller at all, much less dig through his drawer probably full of confidential government documents to lift up a knife that he thinks is suspicious. It’s not even covered in blood or anything?
Naturally Governor Miller’s assistant comes in just then, and Phoenix puts the knife. in his breast pocket. 
bud. It may look like a butter knife, but putting knives up against your chest is not a great idea. Much less stealing a knife from a governor? 
Well, in his panic, he accidentally knocks over a bunch of books on the desk. The governor’s assistant helps him pick them up, and they find a photo. Look a little familiar?
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The photo has the assistant, the victim Robert Cole, Governor Miller, and the victim’s brother who died in an incident two years ago. He’s the “Neil Marshall” of this musical, and he died in what was essentially the SL-9 incident. Same general premise, except it occurred in the courthouse, and the names are different.
AND FINALLY WE REACH THE END OF ACT 1. They do a musical number here which is a weird sort of mashup of the main opening credits song, Edgeworth’s Villain Solo, and the love duet between Phoenix and Leona. They are all such different songs that it sounds a little weird.
ACT 2, FINALLY
The act begins on a sour note with Maya playing with the knife and showing off her characterization, which is one of the most infuriating Maya characterizations you’ll sometimes see around the fandom by people who don’t like Maya.
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Maya: Let me whip up my special spirit channeler hamburgers!
sigh.
But then we’re saved (?) by the arrival of EDGEWORTH, who is presumably just here to chat. He asks Phoenix if he’s defending Leona in hopes of winning her back, then says to keep out of it, since it’s a very important case and he can’t understand the gravity of it.
Then Phoenix says this.
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Phoenix: Would you be saying that if you were the one on trial? The defendant is in a dark prison, reaching out for hope... Can you imagine the loneliness and sorrow of being ostracized?
CAN YOU IMAGINE IT, EDGEWORTH? CAN YOU IMAGINE IF YOU WERE ON TRIAL AND I WAS THE ONLY ONE WHO WOULD DEFEND YOU AND BELIEVED IN YOUR INNOCENCE??
Edgeworth responds to this by essentially rehashing his speech in Turnabout Sisters about how he needs to find all defendants guilty because he can’t guarantee their innocence and all that. Maya gets upset and leaves so that Phoenix and Edgeworth can talk about their childhood in private.
Phoenix once again complains about how people change since nine years old.
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Phoenix then says that he has something Edgeworth doesn’t: the POWER TO BELIEVE! Then Maya comes in and tries to spike Edgeworth’s coffee, so he leaves.
The Class Trial
Phoenix explains a bit about Edgeworth and his backstory to Maya. Namely, the class trial. Phoenix was accused of stealing lunch money, Edgeworth stood up for him, but instead of Larry, Leona stood up for him. I guess Suzuki Kei thought “oh the class trial, if Leona stood up for him, it would be so romantic, because she’s a woman, and he’s a man”, or something like that. 
Edgeworth wanted to become a Great Lawyer Like His Father! But then he turned cold as ice.
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Phoenix: His father got too deeply involved in a case... and paid for it with his life. Edgeworth saw him murdered. He was never the same again. I bet he couldn’t forgive the criminal.
Yeah I bet he couldn’t ever forgive the person he thought killed his father all these years, Phoenix. I bet he really hates that person, Phoenix. I bet he has nightmares about that person killing his father or something, Phoenix.
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Phoenix: He vanished, then returned without his mercy or compassion. He had become a monster. When he lost his father, he also lost the ability to believe in others.
So like... one of the most chilling things about this musical is that they never actually solve DL-6. This probably roughly takes place 15 years after DL-6, since they were about the same age when the class trial started, and at least Leona is 24 now. The next musical takes place three years from now, and in it, Edgeworth refers to von Karma as his mentor, implying he’s still around and doing things.
So, in addition to everything else going wrong with this musical, DL-6 still happens, but von Karma never frames Edgeworth for it fifteen years later. The statute of limitations runs out, and von Karma forever gets away with his crime. And Edgeworth has no idea.
What changes did they make to DL-6, though, you may ask? I’m desperate to know as well. In the third musical, which I’ve watched because I hate myself but am unable to fully understand because I don’t know much Japanese, there is a scene where Miles flashbacks to DL-6. It’s abstract, but he makes gun-throwing motions at Gregory, followed by a gunshot sound.
Therefore, in this musical’s internal canon, either Miles Edgeworth shot his father, or he believes he did for the rest of his life.
... moving on.
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Phoenix: But he still has his humanity. It’s still there, deep down inside!
At least, if nothing else, Phoenix still believes in him. Even this Takarazuka Musical couldn’t touch that.
The Feenie Sweater
Right after this, Larry barges in, and Phoenix leaves him alone with Maya. The musical tries teasing Larry/Maya, but fortunately, Maya’s having none of it.
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Maya: You’re barking up the wrong tree.
Props to this musical for not being as bad as it could have been.
After this, the two sit down on the couch, and Maya asks for more gossip on Phoenix and Leona. Larry launches into a story, which turns into a flashback that ends up being narrated by Phoenix halfway through. This one’s about Phoenix and Leona’s relationship.
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This is an interesting line in here, “I’ll guide you to the future”, for it loosely referencing the sort of love ballad Phoenix sings with Lucia in the second musical which is about “I’ll take you to that radiant future”, and he later sings to the memory of Leona right around the time of his big spiral into despair.
I’m sorry if you haven’t read my other essay and just said “wait what” to what I just typed.
Leona was getting ready to move to New York to defend the weak “in the big city”. This is rather strange wording because it implies that California does not in fact have a big city. She says some things in her conversation with Phoenix that probably plant some of his later issues.
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Leona: This is the first time we’ll be apart since we were kids.
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Leona: We promised we’d always be together.
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Leona: I’ll be waiting. Waiting for you to come to me.
Haha. Sure would be a shame... if something were to happen... and they wouldn’t be able to be together anymore...
So some dancers wearing black come in and take off their outer jackets, to symbolize the passage of time. They circle around Phoenix and Leona. In this, you can just barely see, Phoenix is wearing a pink sweater beneath his jacket.
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“Oh,” I think to myself, “Is that the Feenie sweater? Are they including it here as a reference to the games?”
Then the dancers keep moving.
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THAT IS NOT THE FEENIE SWEATER. That is a pink sweater with a sexily drawn woman on it.
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This is the other half of the reason why I decided to go through with making this essay. 
This is so incredibly funny to me. Suzuki Kei Who Has Played The Games Seven Times has seen the hand-knit bright pink sweater with a giant red heart on it seven times. The sweater Iris, Phoenix’s girlfriend, lovingly knit for him that he wears all the time even though it is one of the tackiest, cheesiest items of clothing to ever exist. And so, when the costume designers were designing the clothes for College Phoenix Wright, they asked themselves: “Should we include the Feenie sweater?”
and “NO,” someone must have shouted, “NO, we can NOT include the Feenie sweater, it is PINK and it has a HEART on it and it’s TOO GIRLY. Phoenix Wright is a MANLY MAN. He would not EVER wear something PINK with a HEART on it.”
“BUT,” someone else said, “it’s a REFERENCE to the original games, where he DID wear a pink sweater with a heart on it! We MUST include it to pander to the fans!”
“WAIT,” a third person interjected. “I have a BRILLIANT IDEA. We can keep the pink... But to make it VERY CLEAR he is a heterosexual, masculine male... we put a sexy woman on it.”
And Person Three Got A Raise.
Thank god we’re finally halfway done this musical.
We Just Have To Go On With Our Lives Now
There’s plot or something happening. Leona breaks up with Phoenix inexplicably over the phone. Probably because of that freaking sweater. Imagine wearing that. God.
Eventually we go back to Phoenix talking to Leona, and he asks about the Jack Lyon case, which is the rip-off version of the Joe Darke case. Leona is pretty cagey about it, but Phoenix proves that she was there in the gallery that day. Leona refuses to answer, claims again that she killed the victim in her case, and leaves.
This makes Phoenix sad, so he starts singing.
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Phoenix: I want to bring you back! I believe in you.
If this sounds familiar, it’s the part where I started absolutely losing my mind in the second musical because this line had never shown up before then, I’d forgotten it was in this musical, and Phoenix was screaming it alone in a red room, so I thought he was like desperately resorting to a necromancy ritual in hopes of bringing Leona back to life.
Instead, this line actually has CONTEXT, though it does just end up enforcing my theory. This is Phoenix mourning what he used to have with Leona, wanting to bring the “old her” back, because he’s devastated that people sometimes change. There are several flashbacks of their college days where he’s wearing his Sexy Woman Sweater. He does succeed in winning her back at the end of this musical. Before she dies, of course.
Phoenix in musical 2 still believes that he can bring back what he used to have with Leona... even beyond death. That’s something affirmed by this musical. I’m very grateful to it for somehow managing to enforce my nonsensical theory.
Doctor Ema
After this, Phoenix returns to his office, and meets with someone new.
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That’s right! Only now, halfway through the musical, do we actually get to meet the Ema-equivalent to Leona’s Lana-equivalent. Her name is Monica Clyde. She has little rainbow heart stickers on her briefcase, which is the closest thing this musical has to acknowledging that gay people exist.
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But what does this little briefcase contain, you may ask? Scientific investigation tools? No.
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A full surgical toolset. Because you never know when someone’ll get sick, or when someone will need an entire operation in front of you. I guess.
So yes, Monica Clyde is not a forensic scientist in training, but a doctor! She decided to become a doctor because of her parents, who passed away of The Sickness, and so became a doctor in order to save lives like theirs.
Once more this has much darker and deeper implications than the musical is even aware of, because Monica is so anxious about treating sick people that she carries a full surgical toolset around with her at all times, scared to lose someone like she lost her parents... and then sometime in the next three years, Leona, her big sister, is going to die.
Of what? The strange Sickness that claimed her parents? A car accident? A botched spur-of-the-moment surgery? Whatever it is, Monica was unable to save her, even when she’d been training her entire life for it.
Monica is not mentioned at all throughout the second musical. It’s as if she does not exist.
Because unlike Ema of Rise From The Ashes, Monica is not at the heart of this story. She is, primarily, a plot device here to make Leona not trust Phoenix so that he can angst about their relationship. 
What a mess this world is.
The Trial, Part 2
Rather than try to prove Leona’s innocence, Phoenix wants to link the current case to not-SL-9, the Jack Lyon case. He does this by showing this picture.
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Senator Cole, the victim, is in this picture. His younger brother whose name I’ve forgotten, the victim of not-SL-9, is also in this picture. They are brothers. It is apparently novel that they are in the same picture, and somehow makes their cases linked.
As well, Governor Miller is in the picture. I guess you could say like... Governor Miller’s legal counsel is the defendant, so that’s another link? Even though the Governor would presumably know a Senator, so this isn’t an unusual group. Right now Phoenix has absolutely nothing to prove that these two cases are linked other than “hey, these two victims are brothers”, but apparently it works. So they spend a lot of time talking about not-SL-9, since Leona has confessed to the murder on day 1 and there is absolutely nothing indicating that she can’t be immediately declared guilty.
They hid the fact that Monica was a hostage in this not-SL-9, meaning that some of the case records were forged. Here’s Edgeworth’s reaction when this comes out.
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Edgeworth: This is an outrage! I’m the most influential prosecutor in America! There’s nothing I don’t know!
In RFTA, when Edgeworth learns he’d been using forged evidence to give a man the death penalty, he is devastated, his entire worldview is shaken, he sees himself as a monster who could end up becoming horribly corrupt if he isn’t stopped.
Musical Edgeworth goes “I DIDN’T KNOW SOMETHING???”
It’s certainly strange characterization, but I guess Edgeworth is further behind in his character arc than in RFTA, so... ugh. Fine. 
Phoenix calls Monica out as a witness to prove she was involved in the case. This causes Leona to panic, and try to dismiss Phoenix as her attorney, like Lana in RFTA, but Edgeworth interjects to call Monica in anyways. He and Phoenix have a little moment.
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Edgeworth: You said to believe in others. I suppose I’ll try believing in you. Try to keep up.
Phoenix: Edgeworth!
So Monica comes to the stand to testify. We get to see this picture of Monica being held hostage, and not-Joe-Darke’s incredible eyeliner.
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Lots of it is very similar to the actual RFTA, except instead of the victim being stabbed on the knight with the giant knife, he’s instead stabbed with a regular old knife. Leona still refuses to admit to what really happened, until Edgeworth convinces her to believe in Phoenix.
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Edgeworth: Your attorney is a runaway train with a one-track mind. Yet he placed all of his faith in you. Believe in him. You owe him that much.
Leona testifies, and says that when she found the victim, he was stabbed with a scalpel.
Here is where things get weird.
Scalpels Can’t Kill People
So basically earlier in this trial, they talk about how Leona knew that the knife that stabbed the victim was double-edged despite being buried in his chest. The judge questions if this means Leona killed him, but Phoenix is quick to say no, she was searched when she entered the courthouse and couldn’t have concealed a knife.
Yet, Monica was able to bring in her surgical toolkit which contains several sharp knives, scalpels, scissors, etc.
This is the first major contradiction.
Leona continues to say that when she found Monica, and the scalpel stabbed in the victim, she also ran into Governor Miller, who if you haven’t been able to tell yet is the Gant-equivalent of this musical. He offered to help her with the cover-up, etc.
The next bit goes a lot like RFTA. Phoenix accuses Governor Miller, who barges in, says Phoenix has the decisive evidence in his pocket. This is the “butter knife” that Phoenix took from his office when he dug around in confidential documents and stole it for no particular reason. It has Monica’s fingerprints on it! ... And Phoenix’s and Maya’s too probably because they were handling it without gloves, but they don’t mention that part.
Leona cries about how she shouldn’t have trusted Phoenix because he was apparently now blaming Monica, Monica looks terrified, she and Leona have some good sister moments but it’s not as good as it could be if the story was actually about Leona and Monica like how RFTA was about Lana and Ema. But Phoenix has the decisive piece of evidence that can turn this around.
It is this:
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Phoenix: Scalpels are made for medical incisions, not stabbings. So how did it stab the victim?
...
...
...
... What?
So like. Yes, scalpels are made for medical incisions. Medical incisions often involve cutting through flesh, very easily. As a result, they are sharp. Extremely sharp. As in: their purpose is literally to stab people, very specifically.
Yes, they’re easier to control, so that surgeons don’t regularly stab people how they’re not supposed to be stabbed, but it’s not like, impossible to stab someone in a killing way with a scalpel? Admittedly, I have never tried to kill someone using a scalpel. And I do not have experience using a scalpel for surgeries because I am not a surgeon. But I’m pretty sure, if you take a sharp scalpel, and you stab someone in the chest with it with a reasonable amount of force... they die.
Like, is this a particular kind of scalpel that is not very sharp? Is the problem that the blade doesn’t match up with the initial wound? But even then, we don’t have the original unforged autopsy report or even a picture, so how would Phoenix know what the original wound looked like to say it didn’t match up? And even then why wouldn’t Phoenix say that instead of SCALPELS CAN’T STAB PEOPLE???
This is his decisive contradiction and it makes ABSOLUTELY NO SENSE TO ME!!!
Well Darn I Guess Scalpels Can’t Kill People
This is such a decisive piece of evidence, that scalpels can’t kill people, coming from the man who thought “caught red-handed” does not involve being caught standing over a corpse with blood on your hands, that it causes Governor Miller to confess.
Unlike Gant, who created the murder with Neil Marshall both to ensure that there was decisive evidence to convict Joe Darke, a serial killer who had not left any decisive evidence behind, and gain control over the prosecutor’s office in order to pull similar stunts to get criminals convicted using false evidence, Governor Miller does not have that as his motive. After all, he’s not a police officer. Instead, he ended up accidentally killing not-Joe-Darke, and then set up the incident in order to get Leona on his side. As her parents were both influential lawyers and very respectable, having her and her parents’ reputation on his side could help him become President of America Where This Takes Place.
So, let’s just take a moment to run over some of the things that made the original Rise From The Ashes great, in my opinion. Just for fun.
1 - The heart of the story between the Skye sisters. Lana closing off to protect Ema, Ema wanting to get through to her sister and get back to the way things used to be. Phoenix, in this story, is more of a bystander to this plotline rather than in the heart of it himself.
2 - Edgeworth’s Character Development. Basically RFTA creates an interesting transition between Turnabout Goodbyes and JFA. It causes Edgeworth to re-evaluate everything he knows about being a prosecutor. So quickly on the heels of Turnabout Goodbyes, it crushes the last bit of hope in him. It compares him to Gant, who also hates criminals, and forces him to wonder if his hatred of crime will one day lead to him being a criminal himself. He’s already convicted one person on forged evidence; how many others could there be?
3 - The Ends Justify The Means. ... wait come back, don’t leave. What I found neat about this case was also Gant’s motive. At one point he was presumably an honest person who hated crime and wanted to stop criminals. But over time in the police force, he became corrupted. He wanted to have all criminals convicted. So what do you do when you don’t have the evidence to convict them? Joe Darke was a serial killer who has killed several people and may have killed more if he’d gone free. The only way to stop and convict him was by using forged evidence. Other criminals could hide evidence to get away with their crimes, so people like Gant would make it up to catch them; but then when do you stop? What happens if there’s no evidence because someone is truly innocent? When does the line between “this person is a criminal and I want to stop them” and “I just want to convict everyone I’m dealing with” become blurred? This is also something he shares with Edgeworth and helps to advance his character.
All three of these things are either lessened or outright ignored in this musical. Leona and Monica’s story takes a backseat to Phoenix and Leona’s Love Story, with Monica only showing up halfway through, and mainly as an excuse as to why Leona is withdrawn. Edgeworth doesn’t seem to blame himself for the forged evidence he used, and doesn’t have a crisis questioning his morality over it. And Governor Miller’s motive is purely power. Unlike Gant, who would have become Chief of Police whether he solved SL-9 or not, Miller needed Leona to win the presidency. And instead of asking her to help him with his campaign like a normal person, he just blackmailed her instead.
... How do you play the games seven times and miss this much?
The Case Finally Ends
god. we’re almost there.
The case ends, Leona is declared not guilty but will still face trial for covering up murders and such. Probably less of a sentence than Lana because she was not involved in ongoing police corruption? Either way she’s dead in three years, so she’s got something a bit more concerning coming up.
She’s led away. Phoenix sings a bit about Leona before being interrupted by Edgeworth... who has something important to tell him.
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Edgeworth: You awakened within me those once-cherished emotions I had discarded. I see visions of a distant, nostalgic past.
So basically this is the unnecessary feelings of the musical. Something along the lines of “seeing you again and fighting for my former ideals is making me question many things about myself.”
How does Phoenix respond?
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Phoenix: Edgeworth... Try talking normally for a chance.
Sure, we were all thinking it, but that’s a little cold, Phoenix.
Edgeworth tries a smooth recovery.
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Edgeworth: I don’t do... idle chit-chat.
This doesn’t accomplish much. So he leaves to allow Leona to visit with Phoenix alone. He’s got to go change for something more important coming up.
Leona and Phoenix decide that they’re going to get back together once Leona is done her sentence! They make a promise that is very funny if you know she’ll be dead in three years.
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Phoenix: I’ll be waiting. For you.
There are a lot of hugs here, I’m not screencapping them all. There are also several moments where their faces get very close together and like, their nose brushes the other’s cheek or something, but they never actually kiss. Is it because the actresses weren’t comfortable with it (valid), or they thought kissing would be too much for the musical (sure, whatever), or since both characters are played by women the show staff did not want two women kissing on stage (probably the real answer)? I don’t like watching kisses, but I kept bracing myself for one and then it never happened, so.
Phoenix ends the main part of the musical with one last musical number starring my personal favourite piece:
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Phoenix: I want to bring you back! I believe in you.
I like to think that at this point, this is present-day Phoenix, after finishing his reminiscing, still desperately wishing he could bring Leona back from death.
But alas, he cannot. And so, after one last daydream of them dancing together on the beaches of California, singing about their love, the musical ends.
Dance Time!
This starts at exactly the two hour mark, if you’re interested in watching what is, once again, one of the only fun parts of this musical.
Seriously, Edgeworth’s actress kills it here, when I first saw this I went “oh, this is why I saw so many people being gay for her on twitter.”
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Edgeworth’s song is an encore of “My Rule”, so it’s lots of fun. Afterwards Phoenix gets another fun piece.
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Then we get to the love ballad part, which I can probably overanalyze, I feel like I haven’t done enough ridiculous over-analyzing in this essay in comparison to the other.
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Uhhh so the fog represents how Phoenix feels lost in this world without Leona. You can see it in the second screenshot separating the two of them, representing the barrier of death between the two of them. Idk it’s midnight I’m getting worn out from having to think about this musical for so long.
But his mourning over Leona’s death becomes even more apparent in the credits, where Phoenix sings that one line again:
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Phoenix: I want to bring you back! I believe in you.
I’m not fixing that screenshot, I think it’s oddly fitting, in a way. That’s me right now.
Then at the very end, he sings this song.
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Phoenix: I’ll spend... this eternal life... soaring through... the heavens!
Technically, this refers to his name Phoenix, but let’s dig a little deeper. He spends the rest of his life soaring through the heavens... the heavens that Leona went to after her untimely death, perhaps?
Overall, the musical becomes much more interesting when you just see it as a prequel to the second musical. This musical establishes many core concepts of Phoenix’s character: his refusal to believe in the concept of things changing, for one, and also his extreme dependency on Leona who he was never separated from since they were kids and where he based his entire life around her dreams and ideals. All he can think about is her. And in the end, he promises to wait for her in California.
Yet, to paraphrase Miles Edgeworth, all that is waiting for him is her death. Their dream of opening up a Mom & Pop Law Firm will never come true.
Thanks again for bearing with me even though this wasn’t as funny!
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