#i have too many feels

[bellezabelize]

New ship just dropped, and what a ship it is

#netflix bodies #henry ashe #alfred hillinghead #i have too many feels #like literally i just hope they've found each other again without it all being doomed from the start #kyle soller #george parker

[nebulein]

Text transcript under the cut

The Freedom of Choice

Windy City Sports, August 2022

"I didn't pick the city, the city picked me," Toews says with a rueful smile. Hockey prospects have no input over who will own their rights for the first few years of their careers, their fates left up to the whims of a bunch of senior executives to decide. "All I ever wanted was to play hockey." Chicago picked Jonathan Toews third overall in the 2006 NHL entry draft and—after another year at college to develop—he's played here ever since. The 34-year-old captain of the Chicago Blackhawks has settled well into the city that picked him, embracing a town and a club that's been his home for over 15 years.

Now, though, he may soon get to pick his next destination. Toews is on his last contract year, and in a full teardown initiated by newly appointed Blackhawks GM Kyle Davidson it doesn't look like there's a roster spot for the veteran captain anymore. "It's hard to know where you're supposed to fit in," Toews says, taking a sip of his coffee.

He looks cozy in the hip but quiet upscale coffee place not too far from his home, dressed down in a lightweight cream hoodie, athletic shorts, and his trusty Birkenstocks. Off the ice, Toews is unassuming, a quiet guy with intense dark eyes that netted him a lot of nicknames early in his career. Age has mellowed the serious center, who was famously prone to outbursts on the bench, loudly arguing with referees over every call he didn't agree with. "Oh yeah, he's gotten soft in his old days," Patrick Sharp, former teammate and good friend of Toews jokes. But age hasn't taken the competitive drive from Toews. He still wants to win. "I don't think time is ever gonna change that," he admits with a laugh.

The Blackhawks are about as far from winning as you can get. With disappointing performances these past few seasons, barely dipping their toes into the playoffs, Davidson finally decided to burn it all to the ground, trading away the few hopeful young talents in Debrincat, Hagel and third overall pick in the 2019 draft Kirby Dach. Toews doesn't like to speak about Davidson's decision, but the stoic mask his face becomes as he politely "no comment"s does all the talking for him. He doesn't agree with the new management the Wirtz family brought in, publicly disagreed with other trades in the past. But the loss of a good teammate is easier to stomach if the return is more than a limp handshake and vague hopes of picking the right prospects years down the line. And Toews' time is running out. For him to still be a part of the rebuild, it would have needed to happen four years ago.

"It is what it is" seems to be the mantra echoed by the players in the locker room, at least the few that were there, that still know what it could've been—if only. Once upon a time Kane and Toews turned Chicago into the most successful hockey team of the last decade, bringing home three Stanley Cups in five years to a city whose streets were lined in red jerseys as far as the eye could see. Now they're the last stragglers of the old guard as one by one the rest of them retired, got traded away or decided to sign elsewhere. Dallas, Tampa Bay, Edmonton, Columbus, Montreal, Washington, Ottawa: the list of possible destinations for a former Blackhawk spans 31 cities and two whole continents overseas. What would it mean for Toews to play with an old teammate again? He shrugs, tracing the wood grain of the coffee table. "Sure, it'd be nice," he says, in the listless way I tell my wife that visiting her parents on the weekend is a great idea.

Jonathan Toews doesn't want to play anywhere else. Fifteen years ago Chicago picked him, and in return he gave everything he had to this city. It's certainly cost him: His health, weathering numerous concussions and most notably sitting out a whole season while his body slowly recovered from a condition that might best be described as physical burnout. His relationships, recently splitting from long term partner Lindsey Vecchione and watching even his retired friends move out of town, back to Canada or Europe. And ultimately, his career.

There's no question he's going be a hockey hall of famer, most likely a first ballot inductee, joining ex-teammates Marian Hossa, Brent Seabrook and Duncan Keith. But what seemed so certain before has now become doubtful under new GM Davidson, who doesn't appear to share Stan Bowman's deep appreciation for Toews and all he did for this city: whether he'll see his number 19 raised to the rafters of the United Center, or whether it'll be Patrick Kane's 88 alone that'll hang up there, next to Chicago greats Mikita, Hull, and Esposito.

The tides have turned in Chicago. Leaving town would mean giving up a dream that Toews still harbors in a tiny corner of his heart: to retire a Blackhawk, never having donned another jersey than the red and white, the C stitched on his chest a sight so familiar few can remember the single year it wasn't there.

But Toews doesn't sound ready to hang up his skates, even though he's got plenty of projects dear to his heart he could focus on, such as his Jonathan Toews Foundation that fosters kids' wellness and nutrition, planting gardens for schools in low income neighborhoods.

"It's a tough choice, but at least it's mine this time," Toews says, trying to make light of a situation that's clearly ripping him apart. It's a statement that's true only on paper. Sure, he'll have the freedom to sign wherever he wants to. But how many clubs can afford to pay the veteran a salary that he deems himself worthy of in a time where the salary cap is flatter than America's Midwest? There may be fewer choices here than Toews makes it out to be. And the one choice he really wants isn't even on the table: to win one last time with the Blackhawks, the team that drafted him.

Hockey life is tough on young players whose only choice is to sign with the club that owns their rights or forego the NHL, but it's even tougher on its veterans whose only choice is the way in which to break their own hearts when the only home they've ever known forsakes them.

#neb writes #fanfic #sometimes you just gotta spend your saturday breaking your own heart #click on the pics to make them readable #jonathan toews #mixed media #chicago blackhawks #i never write gen except when it's to wax poetically about my captain #i have too many feels #hockey baby

[carterashofficial]

Me realizing that the Kenobi show is giving us the reason Leia names her son Ben

#I have too many feels #kenobi show #obi wan kenobi #leia organa #princess leia #ben solo

[klonoadreams]

Between brie, Akari and scarnoa, who the more affectionate, tsundere or violent in showing their love to their respective mates?

Obviously, Punch Baby Akari is the most violent about it, given that it's freaking VOLO, but also she just straight up body slams him to the ground to hug him. Just tackles him, sometimes even bites him. Before the incident at Spear Pillar, she'd just bite him at times like she gets too eager sometimes and it's a habit she picked up from her siblings. Sometimes throws a dead basculin at his face like "EAT."

Can and will kick the shit out of him to knock some sense into him before just straight up nuzzling him because she cares about him.

Brie leans into tsun-tsun, like she's not shy about being affectionate, but sometimes she gets embarrassed that she just goes into full tsundere mode. but it's pretty quiet and all. Otherwise, she just keeps at it until someone brings it up and she just hides her face. (which earns her comments of "HOW CUTE" that makes her even MORE flustered)

(it's tsun-tsun time because she sometimes has to say "SHUT UP!!" when it leans into her more feral side that she's picked up from her forest family. But also when you're part of a massive polycule, it's hard to hide when everyone's on you like "GET HER ASS LMAO")

Scarnoa is the full affectionate one. She's not shy at all nor is she embarrassed, likely because she doesn't really see a reason to. Since it's okay, right? No one is telling her to stop and actually reciprocates, so she just keeps at it. Koraidon rubbed off on her. Nemona thinks it's cute and often reciprocates while patting her on the head, and Arven just gets embarrassed because he DOESNT'T EXPECT IT....but also, affection 🥺🥺🥺🥺 (he's so starved for affection that he ends up just leaning into it and unknowingly reciprocating and he goes full tsun mode if anyone walks in on them like, GOTTA HIDE MY PROCLIVITIES can't let people know we FEEL)

#ask #pokemon #volo #arven #nemona #punch baby akari #brie (oc) #scarnoa (oc) #no manches (fanfic) #into the wild (fanfic) #also ran (fanfic) #feel free to ask me about scarnoa #feel free to ask me about punch baby akari #hell feel free to ask me about everyone i'm in a writing mood #AHHHH #i have too many feels

[devilfruitdyke]

we need to destroy the idea that girls should wear makeup. normalize bare faces on prom queens and flower girls and cheerleaders. no products at all instead of '7 product simple makeup routine.' no more 10 step skincare and regular facials and dermablading and gua sha just to be comfortable with yr natural face. i want to see eye bags on the funny librarian and acne on the swim coach and wrinkles on all our adult role models. i want to see a 16 year old girl that has never tried putting on eyeshadow. i want to see a 7 year old girl who doesn't have to go out and buy powder for her dance recital. i want to see trans women and girls everywhere to never have to wear makeup, regardless of how well they 'pass.' no more 'contouring to look masc' either. a post-beauty industry world is possible

reblogs are on but if you bring up the stage makeup point that i have addressed three times yr blocked on sight ☹️

#this is me warding myself against the b arbie m ovie shitstorm. </3 #too many teenage girls have had 'bimbo feminist' thrust upon them by the attention economy + consumer-feminist culture #its ok to just be fucking lame. like you can still be fem/me and stuff while doing it #there is a world where you can feel comfortable in yrself even if you arent Aesthetic #the makeup industry is trying to hinder this tho #plus i saw that post thats like. 'the reason we see a lot of casual pseudo-gender-essentialist and choice feminism rhetoric... #... is because we have fewer posts now that have basic feminist messages' #that resonated so i am the change i want to see in the world #i wanna try and make a r iot g rrrl masterpost for anyone getting into that side of things later so lmk if you want to see it

[platyroonism]

ra ta tooey

#kris #frisk #chara #papyrus #flowey #undertale #TOO MANY TAGS AAARHGHGHGH #in my perfect world flowey and papyrus are best friends and do studpid shit like that. #it's like the jake-body in adventure time #except flowey fucks with papyrus by stealing his hands or something. #kris can't catch a break. #frisk and chara are just frekaing chilling :) #yay!! yippee!!! they are freinds. #oh oh oh but back to flowey and papyrus #papyrus lets flowey sit on his shoulders for easier and more convenient travel #i feel like this is practice for flowey for when alphys build him an awesome robot body #(another one of the things that happen in my perfect world) #flowey and alphys geek over cool anime robot features #ANYWAYS. hope you are having a great day! thanks for likeing my stuff! #plart

[egophiliac]

You can’t pick Lilia for this. But who is your other favorite short character in Twst?

I like the angry little king boy 🌹

#art #twisted wonderland #sorry epel and ortho i like you guys a lot too! #oh and grim i guess #wait how many other shorties are there in twst #anyway i have a lot of affection for episode 1 and for riddle's character arc #he is a terrible little bastard who is trying very hard to be a slightly less terrible little bastard #and i have feelings about his friendships with trey and cater and che'nya especially! #and how that relates to his upbringing and his dumpster fire of a mom and uhhhhhh you know. everything. #i don't know how to do the words about all the thoughts i have on fictional characters #me waving my hands frantically in the air: it's about LOVE and wanting to be LOVED this is what twst is ABOUT -- #(i am dragged bodily offstage by my collar)

[1982brucespringsteen]

some good news!! the spanish state's ministry of equality has finally passed one of the most progressive trans laws on the planet, shielded free and universal access to abortion and banned conversion therapy and genital surgery for intersex babies, among a lot of other feminist policies. the minister of equality irene montero gave a speech thanking spain's lgtb and trans associations for helping her draft these legislations. couldn't be more proud!!

#spain #trans #ill always prioritize queer&trans revolution over reformism but man. man these are good news #these are gonna make people's life so much more comfortable #i was lucky enough to live in andalucia where we have THEE most advanced regional legislation on trans rights #so i didnt have to fight too many people to access hrt and to change my name on legal docs #but other ppl on the spanish state have been suffering so fucking much #and yeah this law doesnt cover non binary people or migrants but the door is fucking open. its a step forward #and after this terrible terrible week #after the antitrans antisemite game & brianna's murder and so many rampant transphobia #it feels nice to get a win #to have someone in power be so unwaveringly supportive #the queer community in the spanish state is NEVER gonna forget this. never #anyways!!! #felicidades gente trans española!!!! nos vemos en el registro civil dkkskdkkdkxkdk #mine

[shepscapades]

At long last… the story of how Mumbo Deviates! I realize this is the most anticlimactic response i could've given to the crazy number of asks I’ve gotten wondering how Mumbo deviates and asking how angsty or heartbreaking or dramatic it is… but hear me out okay. The idea that mumbo is just doing Normal, Day-To-Day android stuff and some random mob just. spooks him so bad that he deviates on the spot and never tells a soul is not only Hilarious but it also feels Really in character DLFGKJFGJ

(And so, i stick to my guns about mumbo being spared from angst. silly goofy guy who i love so so much =w=)

#dbhc #hermitcraft dbh au #mumbo jumbo #mumbojumbo #hermitcraft #dbhc mumbo #hermitcraft au #art escapades #mumbo #what if iiiii love him so much #he's SO sillay #there were so many different ideas i could have gone with here like mumbo trying to teach grian redstone and getting so frustrated that he #just deviates to get onto him for not getting it LKFGJDLFJGKDFG #idk man but this felt too funny not to go with #it feels so perfect for him #dbhc art

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

anyone else have multiple traumatic memories associated specifically with holidays/family vacations? because that is a topic I never see discussed in all the So You Had A Shitty Childhood, Now What? self-help books i've been reading. but for me, it was a significant thing. and the more i think about it the more it seems like this would be an (unfortunately) common experience. would be grateful to hear if this matches other peoples' experiences...

#not a shitpost #serious post #ask to tag #tw trauma #cptsd #c-ptsd #and if so we should TALK about it #because it means there are a whole group of survivors out there whose mental health regularly worsens during holidays #like i know i am most certainly not the only person who feels an undefined Dread hanging over christmas/my birthday/july 4 etc #bc too many shitty things happened during those times and now my brain is hypervigilant bc traditionally these are the Danger Times #and this seems like it would be particularly common for survivors of abusive/dysfunctional households (aka most people with c-ptsd) #because holidays/vacations typically mean 1) the whole family is together/being forced to interact #2) and undergoing external stressors e.g. travel/relatives aka 'outsiders' visiting/routines & coping mechanisms being interrupted etc #3) there is social pressure for this to be a Fun Family Bonding Experience which only highlights the cracks in the foundation #and exposes the common Everything Is Fine/We Are A Happy Family lie #4) the cognitive dissonance of feeling tired/anxious/stressed/afraid during a time when you are 'supposed' to be Making Good Memories #and then everyone is angry/tired/anxious/triggered and things boil over and something or someone goes Very Wrong #weird that i'm posting this in october when halloween is...sort of the ONLY holiday i have only good and happy feelings towards #i got lucky there #also i have positive feelings towards Labor Day but that's for socialist reasons

[butcharium]

I often do think it is important to call myself a woman. In past I've had kids ask me "are you a man or a girl" and in hindsight I think these kids were quite perceptive of the world. Especially when you're in your 20s it's men and girls, I've seen students write pieces describing themselves as men, but their female peers of the same age they call girls, but I have also heard bisexual women say they like both men and girls. In past I've fallen into that myself and said that yeah I'm a lesbian I like girls, but do I? No I am in my twenties and I am actually only attracted to my fellow adults - women. It does feel more serious, less trivial, both to be and be attracted to women as opposed to girls, and that can be a bit uncomfortable to be faced with. It is also important to me as a butch. I am no longer a tomboy I am a butch I am no longer a girl I am a woman. I am a woman and women can be like me. I don't feel like I've succeeded enough at adulting to call myself a woman, but that doesn't matter. I am 25, and if the word bears other connotations so be it, that's not my problem.

#to be fair i have also heard men on their 20s say man feels too serious of a word to them #but idk like so much of our society infantilize women i wont do the same #but also like in group of friends i do hear both men and women call each other boys/girls like girl's trip/boy's trip evening with the boys #lunch with the girls etc like ofc theres many situations where those words are used past adulthood in a way that makes sense but still #musings #butch

[polarsirens]

short rest

#dimension 20 #dimension 20 spoilers #neverafter #neverafter spoilers #ylfa snorgelsson #prince gerard of greenleigh #elody of greenleigh #fanart #my art #look maybe i have too many feelings about the frog man #i can’t avoid it anymore #gerard is a bit too morose in my imagination #compared to how murph plays him but #yeah. yeah these are my thoughts post ep 12 #here we are

[sliceofdyke]

hey. dont cry. 1 million autisms on earth ok?

#maddie moment #highlight reel #autism tag #1k #5k #10k #15k #20k #seriously tho as an autistic teenager when i realize that there are so many autistic adults that have grown up and succeeded #and not in the corporate success way in the personal happiness way #like people who have good support systems and jobs that they genuinely enjoy #it just makes me feel really happy because that means i have hope too #sillies

[petricorah]

scenes i loved from Real Enough to Get Me Through by @marriedzukka <333 [ids in alt]

#zukka #zukka fanart #sokka #sokka fanart #zuko #zuko fanart #atla #atla fanart #avatar the last airbender #zukka fic rec #myart #yall. yall. dani. this FIC #first off it made me cry twice. not like 'oh im crying' internet speak no. like. eyes are too blurry to read let me stop this for a sec #it is SO GOOD #your prose? amazing #your insights on grief? life changing #THEM??? THEM their relationship and trust #'zuko looked at him and his world shifted on its axis' #ive been thinking about that line for WEEKS STRAIGHT #i can't tell you how many passages i screenshot just because of how beautiful or cute they were #the moment of seeing the painting of sokka's mom? how did you manage to make it so telling character wise--so sweet so PAINful AND so #cute with their relationship?!!?! #'oh so you think i'm beautiful too' #GOD #i had so many scenes i wanted to draw it was crazy #also #'Our loved ones leave impressions on us that can still impact our decisions and feelings even after they're gone' #fuck. had me crying AGAIN #seriously this fic is so wonderful and not just through a zukka lens. truly life changing you're an AMAZING writer #the fandom is so lucky to have you and i can't Believe it took me so long to get around to reading this masterpiece

[hexadonis]

assassin exchange

#my art #i have so many feelings abt the final case #they rlly did a number on each other and we moved on too fast #like to susato that’s her brother and her idol….and then to her and ryu he’s a stranger #idk idk this line just rlly stuck w me #esp when van zieks says kazuma is in danger of becoming an even worse reaper……. #tgaa 2 spoilers #tgaa #tgaa 2 #tgaa spoilers #kazuma asogi #ryunosuke naruhodo #susato mikotoba #great ace attorney #ace attorney fanart #ace attorney #tgaa fanart #asoryuu

[wardingshout]

I'm also having a lot of fun with this game!!

#tloz #a link to the past #I both put so little and too much effort into these #no effort into the starting stage and way too much effort trying to make it somehow work out #it's fun to work like that! #it kinda helps with the stuck feeling since I get to jump straight to what would normally feel like the finishing touches sdhisu #link #zelda #my art #I sure do have a lot of thoughts and impressions of them considering how minimal this game is... (extremely affectionate) #Link's outfit looks like that bc I've gone outfit crazy in totk and I got bored of drawing the plain green tunic for smth else #I wanted to just look at the sprite and do whatever but I love this Zelda outfit too much to touch it too much dfskfu #that was so many tags... maybe nature is healing.... (me)