#i really really hope it has some emotion in it though

[catmiemy]

Another Chance to Live Part 3 (Ana Maria Crnogorčević x Reader)

Summary: Both Ana and you spend some time at your national camps. It helps you to finally realize a few things.

Part 1, Part 2

A/N: At this point I think I'm just committing to aim for an upload every Sunday. Maybe I'll manage to update sooner at some point, but usually I end up being way too busy during the week. And in case anyone is wondering, there will be three more parts after this.

I was really excited for this part, so I hope you guys will be to. And thank you to anyone who has shared their thoughts about this story, it always make my day. :)

Also, Ana at the Champions league final just broke my heart all over again!

The next morning you woke up to an empty bed, and while you missed Ana’s presence next to you, you were also glad for the moment of reflection it allowed you. Last night had blurred the lines between the Swiss woman and you, a prospect that seemed much scarier in the bright light of day.  

Maybe it also felt more daunting at the moment because you were nervous about going to camp. Conditions had improved somewhat for the Spanish national team, but it still wasn’t a happy place to be. It was still an ongoing back and forth, constant fighting for every small thing to hopefully one day get to the point you all wanted to be.

So you didn’t feel prepared for a complex and emotional conversation with Ana right now. You just wanted a peaceful morning with your best friend, eating a nice breakfast, enjoying each other’s company, sharing one last hug before going to your respective national teams. After last night though, you weren’t sure if that was in the cards for you today.

Once you gathered enough courage to leave your bedroom, you were greeted by the smell of coffee and pancakes, your absolute favorite breakfast food. So at least the tasty breakfast part of your wish was being fulfilled.

Ana smiled at you gently and wished you a good morning when she saw you. You echoed her statement, readily excepting the cup of coffee she handed you. It made you happy how comfortable she felt in your apartment, almost as if she was your girlfriend making breakfast for you.

She wasn’t though! She was your amazing friend making breakfast for you, and that was nice too.

“Are you ready for national camp?” The Swiss woman asked while she plated the last of the pancakes and moved to sit at the table.

You took a sip of coffee to avoid having to answer straight away. This was a loaded question, with the potential of leading to a variety of difficult topics you didn’t have the strength to acknowledge right now.

“It’ll be nice to see everyone again,” you offered vaguely.

The blonde nodded in agreement.

“Yeah, that’s one of the best parts of national camp. I’m very excited to see Lia again.”

Ana’s eyes were shining with happiness and you could tell how much she was looking forward to seeing her Swiss friend again. It made you irrationally jealous. You had no right to feel like this, Ana was allowed to have other friends, and of course she should be happy to see them.

“Who are you most looking forward to seeing?” Ana carried on, thankfully completely oblivious to the jealousy burning inside of you.

Her question left you in a bit of a dilemma. There were some players you were always especially excited to see, but most of them were friends of Ana as well and you didn’t want to risk her telling them. Not when you were pretty sure that they would never give you as the answer to such a question.

“All of them really.”

It was more of a non-answer really, but you felt like the time you could take for answering such a simple question had ran out and it was the safest option you could think of.

“I know that they’re all excited to see you too,” the Swiss woman assured you.

You hummed in fake agreement, quickly changing the subject to Ana’s travel itinerary. It was nice of her to lie on your behalf; the blonde had probably caught on that the question had me you flustered. She was empathetic like that. Still, you didn’t want to linger longer than necessary on this.

Sadly, the morning passed way too quickly for your liking and all too soon it was time to say goodbye to Ana for now. You felt like crying, which was ridiculous, it wasn’t even two weeks before you saw her again.

The two of you hugged goodbye and you were relieved that the Swiss woman allowed the hug to last for a while, seemingly also in no hurry to walk away. However, when you finally let go of each other, it was still too soon for you.  

Ana smiled at you with gentle eyes and a slightly melancholy smile. Apparently you weren’t doing a good job at hiding your unhappiness if it was so obvious to her.

“I’ll see you soon, yeah?” The Swiss woman said. “Call me or text me whenever!”

Ana waited for you to nod, then she turned around, waving as she walked away. You had to take some deep breaths to stop yourself from bursting into tears right there in your doorway. However, you didn’t have time for a crying session right now; you had to get a move on to get to the airport on time.

You were ready in the nick of time, finishing a final check when you heard a knock on the door. It was Misa who had offered to pick you up so you could drive to the airport together.

“Ready?” The goalkeeper asked after greeting you, but one look at your face made her change her course of questioning. “Why the long face?”

You shrugged your shoulders. You really didn’t want to get into that right now.

“Well you better put on a poker face before the others see you, or Jenni will tease you to no end about your crush on Ana,” Misa advised.

“What? I don’t have a crush on Ana!” You shot back. „She’s my friend.“

Misa smirked. „Yeah sure, whatever you want to believe.”

“It’s the truth though!”

Your teammate raised her hands in surrender. “Okay, okay.”

You could tell that Misa didn’t believe you at all. But you didn’t feel like arguing any more, you most likely wouldn’t convince her either way. How could you when every reasoning you could possibly give her was a lie?

Heeding Misa’s advice you made sure to erase all sadness from your face before meeting up with the rest of your national teammates. Still, it only took a few minutes after the initial greetings were over for Jenni to approach you with a sly smile on her face. You had never wished for the ground to swallow you as much as you did in that moment.

The older woman threw an arm around you, pulling you close.

“So what’s going on with you and Anamari?” She whispered into your ear. However, she did so loudly enough for everyone in your vicinity to overhear and suddenly all of the attention zoomed in on you.

You freed yourself from Jenni’s holds, crossing your arms and challenging the black haired woman with a hard gaze.

“Nothing! We’re just good friends. Can we move on now?“

“Aw look at you being all firm. Does Ana like that?” Jenni teased.

You flushed bright red, very uncomfortable with this conversation.

“Leave her alone, Jenni!” Alexia commanded and you flashed her a thankful smile.

Jenni rolled her eyes, muttering something about how everyone always ruined her fun, but thankfully she listened to her ex-girlfriend. Though, you weren’t naïve enough to assume this wouldn’t come up again during camp.

It wasn’t until much later, when you were laying in your bed that you wondered how Jenni even knew about Ana and you. Not that there was anything going on, nothing mutual at least. But still, it seemed unlikely that she had come to that conclusion by herself all the way over there in Mexico.

Had Misa or Lola, who had both picked up on your crush a while ago, even though you had never confirmed their suspicions, talked to her about it? Or did she hear it from Ana herself? That would mean that the Swiss woman either had feelings for you as well or that she had realized you were in love with her at some point.

That second option made your anxiety spike through the roof. How embarrassing if Ana really knew! You desperately wanted to go and ask Jenni about her sources right this moment, but in the end you weren’t ready to endure the subsequent teasing.

Therefore you were forced to mull it over silently, trying to find some small scrap of evidence for any of the possible scenarios. It was a fruitless endeavor with the only result that you couldn’t fall asleep until the early hours of the morning.

---

All in all the time at national camp was pleasant enough. You enjoyed being around all of your teammates, even if you had to put up with more teasing about Ana, mostly from Jenni. It wasn’t too bad though and you got better and better at just ignoring her comments.

You also took great care to suppress the goofy smile that always threatened to bubble up when you got a text from Ana. So you were doing your part to minimize the teasing you had to endure.

But then on the night before your last game the Swiss woman called you for the first time since you had parted ways, and it was at the most inconvenient time. You were hanging out with Jenni and most of the Barcelona girls when your phone started buzzing.

Your heart did a somersault when you noticed who was calling. You had wanted to call her every day, every hour really, but had refrained from doing so because you didn’t want to bother Ana. But now she was calling you!

Unfortunately Jenni was sitting right next to you, instantly seeing Ana’s name flashing on your phone. You could practically feel the glee radiating from her. However, you didn’t pay her any attention, too busy getting up and leaving the room while answering the phone. This wasn’t a conversation you wanted to have with an audience.

“Hi Ana,” you said almost at the doorway.

What you heard on the other side of the phone made you foolishly stop in your tracks. The Swiss woman was sobbing into the line and you wished with everything in you that you could crawl through the line to comfort your friend properly.

“What’s going on? Are you okay?” You asked; panic seeping into your tone.

You only realized your mistake when you heard gasps behind you and turned around. And sure enough you were met by concerned faces all around. You waved them off, not really certain what you were trying to communicate with that gesture.

To avoid any more unwanted eavesdropping, you quickly left the room, just barely hearing Irene calling after you to come tell them what was going on once you finished your call. You nodded even though you had already closed the door behind you, so there was no way they could see it.

You kept talking to Ana while rushing to the privacy of your room, telling her that everything was going to be okay, that you were here, that she should try and take some deep breaths, that you would be on the phone with her as long as she needed. You weren’t sure if the blonde even processed a word of what you were saying, but at least this way you were doing something.

You were already seated on your bed for quite a while, repeating the same things over and over again, when Ana’s sobs finally died down.

“Sorry,” was the first thing the Swiss woman said. You desperately wanted to shoot that stupid word to the moon.

“No, no, you have nothing to apologize for! I’m happy you called me. I wish I was near you, so I could give you a hug or something. Do you want me to call Lia and tell her to come give you a hug? I mean I don’t have her number, but I could probably go and ask Mario.”

On the other side of the phone Ana chuckled softly, a noise that sounded heavenly after listening to her miserable crying for so long.

“That’s sweet, but I don’t want Lia just yet. I’ll go see her afterwards, but right now I just want to talk with you a little longer if that’s okay.”

“Of course! That’s more than okay,” you quickly reassured Ana.

Did it mean something that she preferred talking with you over talking with Lia? The Arsenal player was one of her oldest and best friends, so surely Ana should prefer her comfort, unless…No, you couldn’t go there! Especially not right now, when you should be focusing on making the blonde feel better.

“Do you want to talk about it?” You inquired gently.

There was a small pause, but then the words started tumbling from Ana’s mouth.

“Being here is just so frustrating! Ever since I dared to question some of Inka’s decision during the World Cup, respectfully and with sound reasons might I add, she acts as if everything I do is a direct attack on her. Today I brought Rio some water and for some reason Inka took that as me saying she’s overworking us and doesn’t care about our health? I feel like I can’t do anything without offending her.”

“And let’s be honest I don’t really care about hurting her feelings or whatever, she’s a big girl, but then she told me today she won’t play me tomorrow because I’ve been too disrespectful. And I haven’t even done anything! How insecure does a person have to be to act like this? I just wish we could get rid of her already!”

Ana’s voice was getting louder and louder, but suddenly she went all quiet again as if that last thing was too scary to utter it too loudly.

“I’m so scared at this point that I won’t get to play at the home Euros. And that’s my biggest dream. She can’t take that away from me.”

A fresh wave of tears began leaking from the Swiss woman’s eyes, but this time she was crying silently. The only giveaways were some sniffles and the sudden quietness.

You had been listening quietly while Ana spoke, going through your own emotional roller coaster. Knowing that the blonde was in so much turmoil, hearing it from a distance, was cracking your heart one word at a time, one tear at a time.

But you were also furious and if you would have been anywhere near that horrible coach you would have punched her right in the face. Not that violence was the answer, although maybe it was when someone was making Ana feel this miserable.

Then again Inka didn’t deserve any of your time or energy; both were much better spent by focusing on your friend.

“I’m sorry things are so bad right now and I wish there was more I could do, but I’m always here if you need to rant or talk and I can’t wait to see you again and be a real shoulder to cry on. I’ll give you the biggest hug the moment I see you,” you promised.

Ana let out a watery chuckle. “I can’t wait for that. I’m debating if I should just leave tonight,” she admitted.

“I get that, but don’t do that, it’ll only give Inka more ammunition. Try holding out a little longer, I have no doubt that her days are numbered and soon enough you guys will be rid of her. She’s ruining your national team and with such a big home tournament coming up, that’s the last thing your federation will want. And let’s be honest, you have to play at the Euros, you’re one of the biggest names Switzerland has, so it’ll be stupid to leave you out.”

Suddenly you were glad that you had spent a lot of time informing yourself about the Swiss national team, which of course included all of its recent problems. You had rationalized it to yourself by claiming you did so out of professional interest, but really you had wanted to know as much about Ana as you could. And now it was definitely paying off.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right and really it’s nothing compared to what you guys went through. I shouldn’t even be complaining-,” Ana apologized frantically.

“Don’t,” you stopped her, “Don’t do that. There’s no point in comparing bad situations and putting them in any sort of hierarchy. Things suck even if something might be objectively worse and it’s okay to feel bad about it. And it’s always okay for you to tell me about things that are bothering you.”

There was a short moment of silence and of course you instantly played back your words, trying to figure out what you could have done wrong. You probably had been coming on too strong, you should add that you always wanted to know what was going on with all of your friends in order to support them.

In fact, you were already opening your mouth to say exactly that, when Ana broke the silence, “Thank you so much. I’m so grateful to have you in my life. Really.”

Naturally, you noticed that the Swiss woman didn’t clarify that she was happy you were her friend and of course it stoked some foolish hope inside of you. Lately you had been trying to decide what was better, having false hope or having no hope. You hadn’t come to a conclusion yet, so you stayed in this weird state of in between, going from absolute hopelessness to overwhelming hopefulness.

After this you didn’t talk too much longer, Ana wanted to go and fill in Lia. This time you only felt a tiny hint of jealousy at the other Swiss woman, mostly you were relieved that someone close to Ana was going to give her a hug. Even if it would have been much better if it could have been you.

There was a knock on your door about ten minutes after you had hung up. You knew instantly who it was. The only surprise was that it had taken Jenni this long to come and find you. Preparing yourself for more teasing you opened the door.

However, you weren’t met by the usual grinning Jenni with mischief shimmering in her eyes, but by a serious woman wearing a concerned expression.

She waltzed right into your room once she noticed that you were off the phone, sitting down on your bed.

“Is Anamari okay?”

You tilted your head from one side to the other. „She isn’t great, but I think talking about it helped. She went to go be with Lia now.”

Jenni nodded. “That’s good. What was it about then?”

„Issues with the national team. I don’t really know how much I can say. Ana didn’t tell me not to talk about it, but I still don’t want to betray her confidence,” you declared.

Luckily Jenni accepted this easily. “You’re a good friend, chica. But are you sure you’re really just a friend?”

You sighed; of course the black haired woman had to bring this up again. Although, maybe this was your chance to get some more information about Jenni’s knowledge of Ana’s potential feelings.

“Do you know something? I mean did Ana tell you something?” You asked instead of answering the older woman’s questions, cringing at how obvious your eagerness was.

A small smirk crept back onto Jenni’s face. “Oh, no chica, just like you can’t tell me what Ana and you talked about, I can’t talk about what Ana and I spoke about.”

You rolled your eyes, but didn’t really see much of an option to argue her point. It was fair enough, it was just also very frustrating.

Instead of continuing to tease you, Jenni’s expression quickly sobered when you stayed silent. “Look it shouldn’t matter what I possible know or don’t know about Ana’s feelings. You own feelings aren’t dependent on what she feels.“

This was shockingly wise from someone who often acted like a teenage boy. Then again it shouldn’t really be surprising to you because you were pretty familiar with this much more mature and serious side of Jenni that only her friends and family got to see.

And obviously she was right. Your feelings were there whether or not Ana returned them. However, you would never deliberately reveal them to anyone until you where 1000% sure that the Swiss woman also felt something more than friendship for you.

 Jenni let you stew in silence for a while, but when it became clear that you wouldn’t say anything else, she got up with a sigh. She knew there was no point in trying any longer tonight; you needed time to figure things out by yourself.

“Call me when you decide you’re ready to face your feelings out in the open,” she instructed, pressing a kiss to the top of your head before leaving you alone with your thoughts.

---

A couple days later it was time to go back home and you were eager to do so. Still, you took the time to say a proper goodbye to everyone, especially Jenni. It would be a while before you saw her again. And even though she often annoyed you, you also appreciated her friendship.

“Remember what I said, yeah?” She reminded you once you parted ways.

You nodded, convinced that it would never come to this. You couldn’t see a future where you would open up about your feelings any time soon.

Back in Madrid you were faced with the awkwardness of having to tell Misa that you weren’t driving home with her. The moment you had figured out that Ana would arrive after you, you had decided to wait at the airport for her.

Of course you didn’t say as much to the goalkeeper, but she put two and two together easily.

“I won’t tease you right now because you’ve endured enough of that these last ten days, but girl open your eyes!” Misa exclaimed, then she gave you a hug and disappeared.

Why did no one realize that you weren’t oblivious to your own feelings? You were well aware of them, the problem were Ana’s feelings or the lack thereof.

The time waiting wasn’t spend very productive. You were too anxious to potentially miss Ana, so you just sat around staring at the sliding doors she should exit from long before there was any chance of her actually coming out.

When you read on the arrival board that her plane had landed, you suddenly worried that the Swiss woman might find this weird. You had thought it was a nice gesture and it allowed you to give the promised hug at the earliest moment possible, but it might come across as too much.

You had almost talked yourself into enough insecurity that you were going to leave, when you spotted Ana. A huge smile spread on your face and before you even fully registered that it was actually her, your mouth was already moving.

“Ana!“ You shouted.

The Swiss woman looked around, confusion clearly written on her face. However when she was you, the confusion morphed into pure joy. She rushed over to you, tackling you into a hug. It felt so nice, completely right somehow, to have the blonde in your arms again.

„What are you doing here?”  Ana asked, making no move to break the hug. And you sure as hell weren’t going to do so anytime soon.

“I wanted to give you the hug I owed you as soon as possible,” you explained, glad that Ana couldn’t see the blush on your face.

The Swiss woman tightened her hold on you.

“I’m so glad you did.”

At some point you did have to let go of each other, but before you could fully break apart, the Swiss woman caught your hand, intertwining your fingers. She looked at you searchingly; keen to make sure you were okay with this. There was little you had been more okay with in your life.

 “Do you want to come over?” Ana asked hopefully when you got into her car.

“I’d love to,” you responded. “And before I assume incorrectly again, do you prefer to talk about the national camp situation or would you rather just hang out as a distraction?”

Ana smiled at this; she really appreciated your question. At least for the night she actually wanted to think about other things than the national camp, and she told you as much. Therefore the two of you spent a relaxing evening together, ordering food, watching some TV, before going to bed relatively early.

Throughout the entire evening you carefully watched Ana for any hints she might have feelings for you too. And there were some signs, the way she looked at you, how she laughed at your jokes, the way she initiated physical contact whenever possible.

If you would be watching this as a neutral spectator there would be little doubt in your mind, that all of these were subtle clues hinting at a crush. But because it concerned you, you couldn’t be so sure.

And the most confusing thing was the matter of why the Swiss woman wouldn’t just tell you if she had feelings for you. You had been so obvious that everyone else had caught on, so if the feelings were mutual surely Ana would have told you by now?

The next morning when it was time to say goodbye, you once again felt sad. Which was even more ridiculous this time around because you would see each other again the next day.

When you got back to your apartment, you picked up the phone and called Jenni before you could second guess yourself. If you began thinking about it, you would lose your ability to act.

“You were right, I like her,” you stated without even saying hello.

On the other side of the line you could hear a happy squeal, “Finally! You will be so cute together, I can already see myself getting sick when we’re all going to hang out. Maybe you could take a trip over here during winter break.”

It was reassuring that Jenni seemed so sure that this would work out between you and Ana, but you couldn’t get your own hopes up like this.

“Slow down, Jenni. Just because I like her doesn’t mean we will end up in a relationship. I’m still not sure about Ana’s feelings.“

„Oh my god, I’ve never met anyone as oblivious as you! I know for a fact that Ana has been hinting at it for ages, but now that you’ve come clean I can confirm that she also has feelings for you.”

Your heart was soaring at these words. Did they mean what you thought they meant?

“Wait, are you saying Ana told you she liked me too?” You double-checked.

Jenni chuckled. “Yeah, let me spell it out for you; my dear friend Ana Maria Crnogorčević has told me, Jennifer Hermoso Fuentes, that she likes you.”

At this point even you found it hard to hang on to any lingering doubt, but still you managed to do so because there was one last thing bothering you.

“Then why didn’t you tell me before?”

“Because Anamari asked me not to. She wasn’t totally sure if you really had feelings for her too or if you were just confused, so she didn’t want you to be influenced by her feelings. And even though I told her that was stupidest thing I’ve ever heard and that she should just let me tell you because you never believe anything until you get hit by a blinking neon sign, ultimately it wasn’t my decision.”

You couldn’t even be mad at Jenni’s comment about you needing things to be completely obvious; it was definitely true. But you also thought that no one could fault you for having a hard time believing that someone as wonderful as Ana wanted to be with someone as mundane as you.

“But I was so obvious,” you brought up one thing you couldn’t fully understand yet. How had there been any doubt in Ana’s mind?

“Chica, you kept saying things like you love her as a friend or you’re always happy to be there for your friends. Of course she had some doubts,” Jenni pointed out.

“But…But I only said that because I was so obvious otherwise and I didn’t want her to suspect anything,” you defended yourself, realizing how that sounded while you were still speaking. Suddenly it made a lot more sense why Ana hadn’t revealed her feelings to you before.

“Okay, okay, I heard it, don’t say anything, Jenni,” you quickly added, before the older woman could tease you about it.

Then something dawned on you. “Oh god, how do I ask her out though?”

Jenni snorted. “Just ask her on a date. It’s not that hard, you know she’ll say yes now. Just don’t over think it, even if that’s hard for you.”

You nodded, already over thinking it. Should you call Ana now? Should you ask her when you saw each other tomorrow? Should you text her in case she had somehow changed her mind since she last spoke to Jenni?

“I can hear you over thinking it all the way over here in Mexico!” Jenni scolded you. “Just do it. I’d love to hold your hand through it, but it’s the middle of the night here, so I need my beauty sleep. Not that I really need it, I’m pretty enough as it is, but still.”

A pang of guilt hit you. You hadn’t thought about the time difference at all.

“I’m so sorry, I woke you up, Jenni,” you apologized.

“Don’t be, this was a good reason to be woken up for. Go get your girl now,” Jenni instructed.

Despite this you apologized once again and thanked the black haired woman profusely, foolishly saying that you owed her one. Going by Jenni’s reaction you would come to regret this at some point, but that was for future you to worry about

Right now you had other things to worry about, like how to ask Ana out. Even if you had gotten confirmation that the Swiss woman liked you too, it still felt like this had to be perfect, otherwise she might suddenly have a change of heart. 

#woso x reader #woso imagine #woso #ana maria crnogorcevic imagine #ana maria crnogorcevic x reader

[jq37]

FH Junior Year Post-Season Thoughts

With another season of Fantasy High in the books and my recaps all finished, I wanted to do an overview of my thoughts on the season as a whole. Even though I feel generally positive about my experience with the season, there are a few things I think maybe could have been done differently narratively or mechanically. This isn't to criticize the way the season went down or to backseat DM/Play. More my combined ten years of college for textual analysis and storytelling bleeding through, haha. 

I first want to start with the things I thought worked really well.

Fantasy High has "High" right in its title but, in past seasons (and especially Sophomore Year), not as much time as you'd think was spent actually at school and even if it was spent at school, there wasn't much time spent in class or engaging with the realities of being a student. This season really dug into the academic consequences of skipping your classes all the time and the realities of needing to do a ton of extra stuff to try for a scholarship and I think that was a refreshing thing to highlight for a change. Being more scared at flunking out than the dragon that's trying to eat you feels very emotionally resonant. Real "High School Is Killing Me" vibes for anyone who's a fan of NPMD. 

Even though Fantasy High is a show that has some deep emotional beats and strong character arcs, it's first and foremost a comedy show. From the jump, everyone was generating bit after bit that had me cracking up as usual. "Little girly dog collar" is one of the funniest combinations of words I can think of. I think it was Siobhan who said that this was the goofy season and, having seen it, I'd have to agree with her. It never failed to make me laugh and it was always a highlight of my week.  The cast just has great table chemistry that I love to watch no matter what they're doing. 

Watching some of these high level combat encounters is as close as I'll get to understanding people watching sports. Even though combat is generally my least fave part of D&D, I think the cast really killed it this season with how cleverly they played and Brennan came up with some really great combat encounters. Special shout outs to Baron's Game and The Last Stand for their unique mechanics.  

This is going to be one that's on the other list as well because my feelings are mixed, but I genuinely do like the downtime mechanic and how it forces hard choices. I think it's an interesting way to connect a mechanic to the story and cultivate stressful atmosphere for the season.

I have problems with the execution but I love the Rat Grinders in concept. I think as early as season 1 I was hoping that we'd meet a party that was like the Bizarro Bad Kids and the idea of a party that's farming XP instead of going on crazy adventures is a strong concept. Likewise, I think a character that's jealous because of your "cool" (read: tragic) backstory is also a fun trait for an unhinged antagonist in this kind of setting.

This is me absolutely showing my bias but I adored the Abernant Sisters content this season. I dunno if Siobhan specifically asked Brennan to not put her on a bus with the other beloved NPCs or what but I'm so glad she stuck around and we got the development we did. It was almost entirely ancillary to the plot but there was this clear pattern of Aelwyn getting softer and sweeter towards Adaine over the course of the season, from the guarded, "Enjoy the nemesis ward," to, full I love you's and, "I'd take them to get you." It was way more focus than I expected considering that Aelwyn completed the bulk of her arc last season and a lot of the time, a redemption arc basically ends after the big gesture (in this case, Aelwyn taking a magic blast for Adaine in Sophomore Year). So the fact that we got to see all of these sweet moments of them reestablishing their relationship outside of do or die moments was such a pleasant surprise. Again, I fully admit I am extremely biased, but this was my top wishlist item and the season overdelivered so there's a baseline happy I'm always gonna be with Junior Year. 

OK, so moving on to things I things I think could have been tweaked.

Even though I liked the downtime system and the pressures it created, it also squeezed out the chance for more casual PC to NPC interactions that would usually be more common because they were semi-locked behind the relationship track and there wasn't an obvious benefit to roll for Relationships (as opposed to something like Academics which was crucial for not flunking out). Making the mechanical benefit more clear would have helped that (even if it meant Brennan didn't get his reveal--which he ended up just telling them anyway so might as well do it early). The other thing is that the consequence of a rage token was so bad that of course they spent all season avoiding getting one. Things might have gone differently if the consequences had been a bit more obscured, like in Neverafter. And it could have been a nice parallel to the Rat Grinders to take this unknown resource that makes things easier for you but is also having this negative effect. Then it could be like dang we did the same thing they did unknowingly. 

I mentioned this in my recap but I'll talk about it again. It is a little confusing to me that we did the Ankarna subplot right after we did the very similar Cassandra subplot. It took up so much time this season which I don't think is an issue in and of itself, it's just that we literally just went through some extremely similar beats last season. Why double up on this same storyline when there's so much new ground to cover? Or if we're going to raise a god, why not make it a different kind of god? One theory I had early on was that the Rat Grinders were trying to raise their own god to one-up the Bad Kids but instead of raising a chill, misunderstood Cass type, they accidentally raised a god who was erased for a good reason and got in over their heads. 

It's fun for there to be connections between seasons but sometimes it's like, OK that's a *lot* of coincidences. Like the god who your rivals is trying to raise *happens* to be the wife of your cleric's god and also *happens* to be the god of the fiend trapped in your friend's mom's chest and that fiend *happens* to be the relative on your bard's dad's side which is *also* the reason she is randomly cursed? That's a LOT of red string connecting plot points. As unhinged as Kipperlilly is about coveting Riz's backstory if I saw that go down I'd be like you have *got* to be kidding me.  

The mystery elements didn't feel like they clicked as well as they did in other seasons. I think that's partially because Porter's plan was so convoluted (seriously, I made another post about how haphazard his plan was) and had all these moving parts and we didn't get clear answers for a lot of mechanical things like how the rage crystals actually work and when they were implanted and stuff. You had stuff like Devil's Honey which I think is super cool as a thing that exists in the world but ended up being an element that just led the players down the wrong path and had a relatively small payoff (that Porter was using it to lie to Ankarna). I think it's plausible that a forgotten god would be willing to listen to anyone saying the right things without introducing this element. (As opposed to, for instance, Ambrosia which has a very clear connection to what's going on and is a solid clue that someone is flirting with aspirations of godhood.) 

The Porter reveal came so late in the season that even though it was a fun/challenging fight, there wasn't a lot of emotional weight behind killing him. It was basically just dunking on a teacher Fig has always hated who was also mean to Gorgug so screw him. Which, valid of course. But the Bad Kids were never going to react as strongly to Porter as they were to the Rat Grinders so putting Porter in the prime villain spot isn't necessarily what I would have done if I wanted the fight to be more than just a brawl--especially since we've done "School admin with student minions" already in S1. I don't mind the full circle callback but it would have been nice to pick something else for the sake of variety. We haven't had a child mastermind yet and I think Kipperlilly could have been a great candidate for that. My friend suggested that it would have been fun if Kipperlilly was trying to become a god instead of just being Porter's underling and I agree. "I'm not anyone's chosen one so I'll choose myself," is still within her established jealousy and Type A tendencies. If we want to keep Porter involved since that was Brennan's gift to Emily, maybe have it be that instead of Kipperlilly working for him, he's working for her. Like Artemis Fowl vibes! And the Rat Grinders can be varying levels of on board--from true believe to redeemable. I don't think Brennan planned for the Bad Kids to ever redeem her so might as well go full megalomaniacal mastermind with her and make her The Villain if she's not gonna be nuanced anyway. If My Little Pony can do it and send a literal child to Tartarus for pony treason (or whatever Cozy Glow did), Fantasy High can too. 

Continuing from the above, if we have the Porter fight in place of the Grix fight (a la Daybreak) and don't use Ankarna, that gives way more time for the Bad Kids to investigate the Rat Grinders throughout the season and it would mean that they would have their personalities developed a lot more. With the limited downtime, they Bad Kids didn't have a lot of time to spend on these kids who were just hating on them for no good reason (valid). But if you cleared their plate of the god hunt stuff, they'd have more time for this. And if they weren't all rage zombies to varying degrees, it would be easier to see them as characters. Besides Kipperlilly (and, funnily enough, Mary Ann) we don't really have a good read on what these kids are actually like. The little time we spent with them all season was kind of a wash if them breaking out of rage means their personalities got laundered too. Anyway, regardless of how their loyalties ended up shaking out, it would have been fun for them to be more than the minions that they were in canon. As funny as it is for them to just kinda be XP farming losers, they did have the potential to be more interesting in their own right if they weren't just Porter's minions. And again, we've done adults forcing or coercing children into being minions in Freshman and Sophomore Year already. Lemme see some self-created child maniacs! (Or, peer pressured child maniacs. That's cool too. The Lucy/Kipperlilly dynamic is way more interesting to me if it's like girl, I would take a bullet for you but I CANNOT walk this path with you any further in response to *I* will be a god and you can be *MY* champion.)

Anyway, those are my thoughts! Like I said, I have my points that I think could have been tightened, but overall an enjoyable season and I will be glued to my screen if they decide to close out with Senior Year! 

#dimension 20 #d20 #fantasy high #spoilers #I had so much fun with this season but the overall plot makes my brain throw up question marks if I map it out or think about it too hard #but then I think about adaine and aelwyn at basrar's and it's like wow 10/10 flawless execution #I don't know if I've been clear enough about this over the season but I LIKE kipperlilly as a character #I think she sucks and that's great #I think she should be worse actually #like own it #don't be a pawn in some loser's plan be your own girlboss #grind those rats chug that ambrosia #be the teenage demi-god you think you deserve to be and drag your friends into your plan with the sheer force of your personality #make it 100% sure that there's a spot in hell waiting for you when you get sent there #imagine the level of vitriol they had towards kipperlilly as is and then imagine she has legendary actions #I think her going down to riz like a chump is such a huge W for riz and fitting for how the narrative played out #but to use wrestling terms for a second #it was a waste of a LOT of heat #Porter didn't have NEARLY as much heat as she did

[hockeyrat]

Tate Langdon NSFW Alphabet,

(A/N! This is my first written smut!!! I haven’t yet finished Murder House and I have really bad focus on tv shows so I really hope this is good enough! The divider (flowers and leaves is from @/mietteone) I’ll try and make this without any gender talk!)

A= Aftercare (what they’re like after the act)

He’s very cuddly after a round of sex, even clingier if the two of you go for longer than a round. He can’t find himself letting go of you at all. He’ll probably fall asleep first btw.

Yet some days he’s not as happy has the others, he’ll distance himself from you after sex for a few minutes, lay by himself and stare at the wall before he finally cuddles up to you, only if he can be the little spoon though. Maybe he’ll start venting or crying, but most the time it ends in cuddles and cockwarming if he’s upset.

B= Body part (favorite body part themself and their lover)

He definitely prefers his hands or his mouth, Tate likes holding onto you while fucking, even if it’s not during sex he loves holding you. Running his hand up and down your thigh or gently grazing your neck and the hickeys he left the night before.

His mouth because well, he can give you all the hickeys and kisses in the world! Marking you is his favorite past time, Tate trails kisses down from your chin all the way to between your legs where he can give you the most sloppy oral ever.

Tate can’t pick and choose parts of your body, all of it is the most perfect thing he’s ever seen. But he prefers your face, the way you express your love and watching you talk or whimper under him is the best! Really likes your hair aswell, he can tug and play with it all he wants.

C= Cum (anything that has to do with it)

Inside. He doesn’t care about anything….all he wants is to just stay inside of you a little bit longer…. Talks about breeding you even if he wouldn’t consider a baby at all. (Unless it’s the antichrists :3)

He supposes that he’ll come on your stomach, second favorite place ever, pulling out and letting it spill all over your smooth skin. It gets him going for a second round.

D= Dirty secret (Pretty self explanatory)

First day you moved in, he was already stalking you, watching everything you did even if it was in a sexual way, he also took a habit of stealing your underwear and shirts…just so he could feel closer to you.

E= Experience (do they know what they’re doing)

Not really, no, he didn’t have much of a sex life when he was alive. All he really had was porn and his imagination.

F= Favorite position

Simple missionary is the best, he can watch your face contort into all the different little emotions you have to show while you whimper out his name and beg him to go faster. It’s also super easy to kiss you when you’re facing him.

Back shots when he’s angry, shoving you into the mattress and almost growling into your ear, it’s crazy how fast he can go from loving and caring to nearly suffocating you in the pillows. He’s still gonna leave marks all over your back.

G= Goofy (how serious are they)

Tate likes to crack a few jokes, jokes about being dead stuff like “ever been fucked this good by a ghost?”. Little comments like that or a knock knock joke if he’s really in a good mood.

Yet, like I’ve stated before, when he’s upset, he doesn’t crack jokes, he barely even talks unless he’s telling you how good you’re doing.

H= Hair (grooming habits)

He’s always been a smooth person, he likes shaving, it’s uncomfortable with hair in places like that. Occasionally he’ll have a bit of a carpet but it’s never more than a little chunk of it.

I= Intimacy (in the moment romantic or dirty)

He tries to be romantic, maybe some flower petals scattered along the halls to your bedroom. Or a lit candle sitting on your bedside table, you have no idea where it came from btw.

He praises a lot, telling you how good you’re doing and how pretty you are. He needs to make sure you understand how much he loves you.

J= Jack off (do they masturbate and how often)

Before he met you (well before he actually started talking to you) he was a compulsive masturbater. Any moment he was stressed or when he could catch a glimpse of you changing, he had his jeans down to his knees in a second.

Yet now that you two are dating, he doesn’t jerk it as much, only when you’re at school and can’t find himself waiting for longer than an hour. He knows you’re always up for a round or two if he needs some help.

K= Kink (well, kinks!)

Choking, Praise, occasional degration, (definitely a mommy kink. He also really wants to fuck you in the latex suit.)

He likes to be choked more than choking you. Scared that he’ll possibly hurt you or even kill you if he in a bad mood. So he prefers being chocked when he’s on the bottom.

Praise goes both ways, if you praise him, he’ll cum immediately after whimpering and begging for “momma’s help”. Tate loves praising you, I’ve stated before that he needs to make sure you understand how pretty you are.

Degrades you when in a bad mood, calling you a whore, slut, etc. Sometimes he goes a little far, and he’ll make up for it with the best cuddles and aftercare ever.

Mommy kink, Only really when he’s on the bottom or in an upset mood. With how much of a bad experience he has with his mom, he finds a tiny bit of comfort in calling you his momma in bed.

L= Location (where they like to get it on)

the bed is always a number one place. It’s comfortable and easy for cuddles right after the deed has been done.

Occasionally, he’ll fuck you over a kitchen counter if your family isn’t home, These are typically the days he’s not in a good enough mood to wait.

Infront of a mirror. Pretty self explanatory but he doesn’t do it often, sometimes he really really needs a confidence fix so he fucks you infront of the mirror and degrades the hell out of you.

M= Motivation (things that makes them tick/turn ons)

Just you in general gives him the worst hard on imaginable. But if you’re wearing shorts or a skirt, he really can’t keep his hands off of you.

Making out and giving him hickeys will also make him horny. He enjoys all the kisses and sloppiness of pre-sex kissing.

N= No (turnoffs or absolutely won’t do)

Refuses to ever share you, nothing like threesomes or cucking or letting someone else watch. He gets jealous really quick, he needs you all to himself.

Bodily fluids that aren’t blood/spit/cum. It’s gross, Tate gets disgusted at the mention of it.

Not a huge fan of role plays. Can’t really elaborate on this one but he likes being Tate and you being….well you.

O= Oral (receiving or giving and how skillful they are)

Really good at giving you head, it’s surprising since he never had much experience but he finds himself giving really sloppy and really amazing head.

Loves when you suck him off, he’ll act like he hates it and that he’s some tough guy but the moment your lips wrap around his dick. He’s whimpering and moaning and begging for more, he’s very loud.

P= Pace (how fast they are and how long they last in bed)

I explain this a bit more in Q. But normally he prefers slow and sensual sex. Taking all the time he needs to please you and himself, he can normally last well past your orgasm. But for rounds, he can last about 2 and a half before he starts unraveling.

He can get rough, lasting for about 3-4 rounds with the fastest pace ever imaginable, I mean he’s dead, his energy levels are really off the charts. He can last a good 2 hours without cumming but when he does, it’s a lot.

Q= Quickie (do they prefer fast and hard)

Some days, yes, and some days, no. Sometimes he just needs a little relief and a quick round of sex. On those days, he’ll really rock your shit and go right back to wandering around the house and doing his ghostly things.

If he’s upset or really needs you, he prefers to take it slow, being able to have you under him for as long as possible. He only finds himself speeding up if you want him too, but you have to beg him first.

R= Risk (do they like to try new things)

Yeah, definitely into trying some new kinky things. Like if you asked to tie him up or asking to be tied up. He’ll try it, anything to make you happy, oh it’s an added bonus if you unlock some deep secret kink inside of him.

S= Stamina (how many times they can go and how long each round lasts)

typically, Tate can last 2 rounds, he finds himself getting overstimulated too quickly if he goes on for too long and can’t pleasure you anymore.

If it’s one of those days, 3 or 4, he just needs to get all the energy out. He’ll take small breaks in between if you need them but doesn’t find himself taking breaks.

T= Toys (do they use sex toys on themselves or their lover)

He doesn’t like them but he won’t be pissed off if you own a vibrator or dildo. He understands that he’s not always there when you’re in the mood but he can show you how much better he is then those stupid pieces of silicon.

Not much of a toy user, I mean he won’t start complaining if you use a vibrator on him or something to punish him

U= Unfair (do they tease or do they enjoy being teased)

Typically, no, but ifs he’s mad. Yeah, he’ll spend at least an hour teasing you and pushing you to the edge. He’ll fuck you then give you head and repeat the cycle until you’re basically crying.

Tate enjoys being teased more than he’ll admit. At first he’ll laugh it off and say he can handle it like a man, but after about 2 minutes. He’ll be underneath you, crying and begging (just like how teases you!). He can’t really handle what he dishes out, but he really does enjoy it.

V= Volume (are they loud, what sounds, and do they talk)

The first time, he tried to stay quiet, felt embarrassed at how loud he was. He was basically screaming while jerking off so he didn’t want to make a noise while having sex.

Until he let a few moans slip and you loved it. You told him that the more he moaned, the better. So he never really held back unless your family was awake, he’s really loud. Whimpering, moaning and groaning, all the noises that a man could make, Tate can make them.

W= Wild card (random sincannon of any sort)

As I briefly stated in K, Tate really really wants to fuck you in the latex suit. He will never admit unless you say something first but that’s all he really wants.

X= X-ray (what’s down below in dem pants)

6.5 inches when he’s soft and about 7 when he’s painfully hard.

Y= Yearning (sexdrive level)

Pretty high, he gets horny easily and can’t really get rid of his hard ons as easily. It’s a good thing since he knows you’re always up for a quick round or two.

He’s also pretty patient, if you tell him to wait an hour so you can do homework. He’ll wait (after a few minutes of whining and complaining). He can wait but it’s not his favorite.

Z= Zzzz (do they sleep after if so how quickly after)

He tries to stay awake longer than you so he can lull you to sleep or make you feel more comfortable for the last moments of the night but he normally falls asleep first. Especially if it’s been a rough day for him.

#x reader #x female reader #x male reader #tate langdon #tate langdon smut #evan peters smut #evan peters #american horror story #american horror murder house

[xxxninjaxxx23]

You brought the light I needed in my life

Part 1

Samantha Carpenter x GN Reader.

New York City has always been a bustling hotspot for restaurants, opportunities, and some “night activities.”

And yet Samantha Carpenter can’t shake this emptiness she feels everyday in her life.

(Sam’s Pov) It was a busy friday evening and I had just gotten off my shift at the diner. The Manager let me go home early with my regular pay as a reward for working hard.

Truth is. There’s a reason why I don’t take days off and constantly work.

I wrapped up my leftovers in a bag for dinner later and walk back to the apartment since the gym was closed today ‘that’s where I usually spend my time’.

New York being the big city it is, I had to bump through crowds, junkies and greeted some couples. When I got to my complex, some people were already shooting looks at me, one threw a paper ball at me.

‘Looks like our neighbors know I’m the daughter of a small town serial killer.’

After getting past the death glares, I enter my apartment and put my leftovers in the fridge. Then I pour a cup of whiskey, sitting down to collect my thoughts, not bothering to turn on the tv.

I hear the door open a half hour later “Sam! Im home” hearing that voice always brings a little smile to my face.

Tara sets her shopping bags down and sits on the couch next to me, turning on the tv. I felt a bit of joy knowing I’m giving Tara what she always wanted. A degree, a boyfriend, and freedom to live her life provided she be careful of the dangers.

I took a sip of my drink “So how was your date with Chad?”

Tara jumped in excitement “Amazing! We went to a nice restaurant that had an open mic. You should have seen Chad try to sing “All of me” he did it a little off key but reassured that it was a “song picked just for me.” Tomorrow we’re going to an arcade that just opened. Want to join us?”

I felt an ache in my chest and it wasn’t the whiskey “Thank you Tara….but I don’t want to impose. Especially since I’m letting you live your life freely.”

Damn. I didn’t do much to hid my emotions and Tara was quick to notice.

“Is everything ok?” She asked putting a hand on my shoulder. Normally, I hate being asked that but this is my sister ‘sigh’ “I guess….I guess I’m just lonely to tell you the truth.”

Tara was confused “Lonely? Aw don’t be silly, you have me and the twins.”

Sam sipped her drink once again “I mean you know….lonely.” Tara playfully slapped her forehead. “Ohhh I see. I mean, I can try to help you find a date.”

I smiled a bit. “That would be nice, I just hope I find one. It’s not that easy when you’re the daughter of the first Ghostface.” Tara nodded “If that worries you, I can take a break from Chad and spend some time with you.”

“But Tara, you love him.” My sister nodded “I do. But you’re my sister and I love you more. All you have to do is say the word.”

I sniffled heavily before wrapping my arms around Tara “Oof. How can a (Guy/Girl) not love a woman with big muscles?” I laughed a bit.

(1 month later)

(Tara’s pov) True to my word, I spent more time with Sam. Even though she assured me that it was ok with me bringing Chad to the apartment or going on dates with him.

Since Chad is still asleep from finishing that assignment, I’m eating breakfast with Mindy and Anika. They were surprised that I chose to eat at the place Sam works at.

“I think I know what i want.” I said as Mindy looked up from her menu “T. Did you choose this place because it’s that good?”

“Or did you want a free meal from your sister?” Anika finished, laughing.

I rolled my eyes “No….I’m going to pay for-“ I felt my pockets “Shit! I forgot my wallet!” Mindy shook her head “Didn’t you forget it the last time you went with my brother to that restaurant.”

I blushed from embarrassment “Y-yes but I gave him the money back when I got paid.”

Anika nodded “What you really need is one of those wallet chains so you never have to lose it again. Plus it would look hot on you.”

Mindy playfully smacked Anika’s arm as Sam came by to take our orders “Now, now. Don’t kill each other until AFTER you eat.” As we took our orders, I picked mine which was a bit pricey ‘Sorry Sam.’

“Umm big sis. You think you can spot me for this one?”

Sam rolled her eyes “Again? How many times do I have to tell you to stop forgetting your money?” Tara smiled playfully “Pleaseeee. I won’t forget next time and I will pay you back, I promise.”

(Sams pov) I shook my head, not wanting my sister to throw a tantrum or steal somebody else’s food “Fine. I’ll hold you to that.” I gathered up the menus and took the orders to the kitchen. After that, I decided to wipe down the counter since it was a slow morning.

I was finishing the display case until a new customer walked in. “Welcome to Crown Shy. Would you like

I looked up from the case and was at a loss for words when I set my eyes on the person that walked in.

(Sorry I had to. Lol)

Their (gothic/eccentric) attire was stunning enough to make a lot of heads turn. I shook my head, hiding my blush “ ‘Ahem’ Welcome to Crown Shy. Would you like a booth or a table?”

(He/She) requested a booth saying they have a friend meeting them here for a class assignment. My shoulders tensed as I dropped the menu on the floor, running to get new one “Sorry about that”

I took a quiet breath and awaited their order.

(Tara’s pov) Another waitress brought our food and we were in the middle of a feast until I spotted Sam making eyes at the new customer that just walked in. I tapped Mindy on the shoulder “Ooh! Direct hit Cupid.” Mindy whispered.

“I’ll say. I think this is the first time I seen my sister as a drooling lovesick puppy.” I nearly laughed when she dropped the menu and went to snatch a new one off another table “Smooth move Casanova” Anika whispered.

After Sam took her potential lovers order and brought their food out, she stepped outside telling her boss she was taking her fifteen. “Looks like someone needs a little push Tar” Mindy said.

I nodded as I went outside to find Sam with a hand on her chest, trying to control her rapid breathing.

“Someone’s got a crushhhh. Someone’s got a crushhh” I said in a singing voice, handing Sam a water bottle from my bag.

Sam wasn’t amused and showed her blush “Look. Try to talk to them Sammy. This is your chance to finally get a (Boyfriend/Girlfriend)”

She took a sip from her water bottle “B-but what if they don’t like me? What if they find out who I really am and never talk to me again?” I gently squeezed her shoulder

“Sam, you won’t know if you don’t try. I’ll be right there to comfort you if anything happens. Just introduce yourself and ask if you can sit with them until their friend shows up, make some small talk my hot sis.

(Sam’s pov) I shook my head, smiling “I’m not really that hot but I’ll still make small talk with them.” We both head back inside the diner, seeing that the new customer is already eating their food.

I check my watch “Ok still on my break, time to make my move” I whispered.

I walk over to their table “Hi. Um, do you mind if I sit with you? I’m currently on break and my coworkers are having a football debate back there.

The customer looked up and smiled “Sure. I could use the company, seeing my friend is running a bit late.”

I hid the excitement in my stomach and sat down. “I’m Y/N by the way Y/N L/N.” They said extending their hand “Samantha….Carpenter. It’s nice to meet you.”

“I’ll say. It’s not often I see a pretty girl wanting to have lunch with me.”

I was flattered “So you think I’m pretty?” Now it was their turn to blush “Um s-sure? I mean I would really like to get to know you more.”

I felt my phone vibrate. I open it to see laughing emojis from Tara saying we are “Both hopeless with the small talk.” I shot a look at her, shaking my head.

I took a breath and engaged in a conversation like our favorite hobbies, movies, latest tv shows. I was amazed by how much we have in common unlike Ritchie who never liked almost all my hobbies. Sometimes I question why I got with him in the first place.

Anyways we talked a bit more along with me complementing their outfit, saying it “Makes them stand out and look more attractive.” I didn’t realize how long we were talking until I realized I was five minutes over my break.

I quickly jumped from the booth and back to my station in a flash but not before leaving my number on the receipt if they want to talk more.

(One shift later)

(Sam’s pov) This day was very slow and tiring. I was anxiously waiting for the time to fly by and luckily it did. But earlier, Tara didn’t help by eating loud and throwing trash on the floor. I swear my sister has the manners of a child. I rest my case when she let out a loud belch which ‘sigh’ everyone heard!

“Sorry! Excuse me!”

I cleaned the rest of the floors and whatever trash was on the tables as the last 30 mins approached. When it was time, I clocked out and said bye to my coworkers and boss.

Heading outside, I put my apron away and check my phone for any new messages. I got one from Tara who once again teased me that I was in a rush to see my new “lover.” I rolled my eyes and left that on read.

The next message was from….Oh Y/N and they asked if I wanted to watch a movie together. I responded back to it being a plan. We’ll watch a movie at my place and I’ll make the best dinner.

(Later)

(Tara’s pov) I sat on the couch waiting to go to the arcade. Chad really needs to stop staying up late and sleeping in late. It’s getting pretty hectic but I still end up dealing with it.

I check my phone “Hm, still got an hour left” I turn on the tv and snack on a few corn chips.

I got halfway through an episode of South Park until Sam came by with a hand vac, “Tara! I just cleaned here. Must you always be so messy.”

I scoffed “Looks like someone’s eager to keep the place clean for their new (Boyfriend/Girlfriend)”

Sam snatched the chips away from me “They’re not my lover. I just want spend time with a new friend, and that is making sure this place looks presentable.”

I nodded “Sure and I’ll be a millionaire one day. Look I get it. You want to make a first impression and that’s ok. No more lone wolf tonight Sam, it’s time for a new chapter, go get (him/her) tiger!”

(Sam’s pov) After cleaning Tara’s mess for the second time, I take a long needed shower and put on something simple. An hour later, the doorbell rings. “Y/N! Nice to see you again. It’s me uh Sam….from the diner” We both shared a hug before they went to the living room to pick out the movie.

Tara left for the arcade but not before ripping into me again “I swear you have no game sis. How did you even end up with Ritchie?” She whispered, laughing as she closed the door.

Damn it Tara! Why do you have to be such a gremlin? Though she’s not wrong, I really need to work on my pull game.

‘Just be yourself Sam, just be yourself.’

As I got the cooking utensils ready, I called from the kitchen island “So baby. Did you choose a good movie for us to watch?” I slapped my mouth

‘Of course! Leave it to Sam Carpenter to find a way to fuck a simple question up!’

Y/N smiled, laughing a bit “Hmm not yet. Maybe you should pick, baby.” They said, winking.

‘This is gonna be a long night…..good, I hope it never ends’

After Y/N selected the movie to watch, (he/she) joined me in the kitchen to help prepare the food.”

“Ok let’s make some of my famous pasta. Normally we charge $19.99 for this at the cafe.” Y/N was shocked “$20 for pasta?!” I nodded “It’s a family recipe, my um….father knew the right spices to use.”

Then we set the noodles and water to a boil. As it was cooking along with the sauce, we took the opportunity to take some silly pics together then post them. When the food was done, we set the plates and ate on the coffee table (Sam made sure it was clean after her sister put her bare feet on it recently. She really let Tara have it afterwards)

“I hope this isn’t a gory movie. I don’t want to lose my dinner.” Y/N shook their head “No this is more of an action movie. It’s called John wick.” Sam smiled “I don’t think I ever heard of that movie.”

A few hours into the movie, Sam was blown away by how ruthless this man was all over a car and…well I guess it makes sense with the dog.

(Y/N’s POV) After the movie was over and we cleaned up, I got my jacket and was about to head out seeing it was late. I said my byes but right as I was about to leave, I felt a hand on my arm “Stay with me….please?”

I smiled ‘How can I say no to that face?’ “Alright but um….I don’t have any sleepwear. I might have to sleep in my underwear if you don’t mind?”

I saw sweat pouring down from Sam’s forehead “N-No…I don’t mind at all.” I gave her a kiss on the forehead ‘probably shouldn’t have done that’ but she shrugged it off and led me to her room.

(Bedroom)

As Sam was in the bathroom, changing into her night clothes, I stripped down to my underwear. I put my clothes next to the bed on the floor. Few minutes later, Sam came back wearing said night clothes but she stood like a deer in headlights.

I was confused for a minute but then realized “Ah, you like what you see here? I said, showing off my body a bit.

Sam swallowed “Mmhm” was all she said before pulling me into bed with her.

Sam had a tv in her room so we watched a show just to fall asleep to but mostly talked a lot rather than watch the show or even drifting off to sleep.

I decide to try my luck “Snuggle me?” Sam was hesitant “Y-you want me to snuggle you?” That got me nervous, hoping I didn’t push things too quick besides the kiss of course. “Yes…but I understand if you don’t want to. I’m not here to make you uncomfortable.”

I felt some relief when she giggled “Come here.” She said extended her arms which I fell into perfectly. I felt butterflies in my stomach as she nestled next to me. “Sorry I was a little confused at first because no one I dated asked me to be the big spoon.”

I faced her a bit “Hm? Who wouldn’t want a woman with big biceps wrapped around them so safe?” Sam smiled “Probably because, they were jealous that I was more fit and muscular than them.”

I shook my head “I guess they forgot the definition of “Exercise” and “Workout” I said. “I do workouts myself but I been meaning to find a partner to go to the gym with.”

Sam rubbed my arms sounding a bit tired “I’d be happy to fill that role and go to the gym with you.”

I felt myself blush ‘Part of me really wants to kiss Sam for real this time but I don’t know if she wants a relationship now…or one with me. That might not be true, maybe just maybe I might have a chance at love again….I hope.’

I stayed awake for a bit hoping to ask Sam if she’s interested but I didn’t realize that sleep has taken her until I heard a snore from said girl. “Maybe tomorrow….yeah tomorrow’s ‘yawn’ a good day to tell her.” I felt my eyes get heavy, then fell asleep into Sam’s arms, holding me in place.

(Later on into the night when the pair were fully asleep, Tara came home and went to check on her sister. She had to stop herself from squealing at the sight that had emitted her eyes.

“This is definitely going on my page.” Tara said as she snapped a quick photo then left, closing the door.

“Goodnight Sam….Goodnight Y/N. I think you just brought the light my sister needed in her dull life.”

To be continued

Btw there’s the idea of the reader but the choice is still your’s if these pictures don’t cut it

You got the gothic(eh maybe) or the elegant reader lol.

#sam carpenter #sam carpenter imagine #sam carpenter x reader #sam carpenter × you #scream x reader #gender neutral reader #scream #romance #Youtube #melissa barrera #tara carpenter #sam and tara carpenter #sisters

[milquetoast27]

I had sort of forgotten that the Rathbone Renaissance was mostly limited to the Letters From Watson (LFW) server. Yesterday, I only briefly got to justify my love for Nigel Bruce's Watson in Regent's Park to a fellow fan, so I'd like to expand on my love for him for anyone who is curious. This, for the record, is coming from someone who used to despise non-faithful adaptations, but now lives as someone who embraces them.

The dynamic of Rathbone's Holmes and Bruce's Watson flips the original script! Often (especially recently) we have Watsons watching over and taking care of Holmeses (due to drug addiction, depression/lethargy, lack of appetite), but it's honestly heartwarming to see a Holmes that cares for his Watson so much. Take him wrapping Watson up after falling in a bog in The Scarlet Claw, or saving him from the poisonous gas in The Spider Woman - our Holmes in the Canon has never really gone to such lengths, with maybe the only exception being 3GAR.

So the major thing is that even though Bruce's Watson is much slower than his original, it does not take away from his value as a person, a human being. At the very least, this is the case in my view, even if it did ruin The Good Doctor's image for MANY viewers, who tended to write Watson off as an idiot purely from Bruce's portrayal. But take, for example, the scene from The Adventures in the hansom, 'You're an incorrigible bungler,' Holmes says, but none the less, Watson receives a heartfelt smile and pat on the back. I think, no matter how you actually characterise Holmes and Watson, their bond is the core of them and is the only requirement in adapting them. And if I'm being honest, Rathbone and Bruce's portrayal has been one of the most successful in assuring their viewers of the Legendary Pair's bond.

So, in some ways, their dynamic is very creative and spins things from the original text! We have a Holmes who is far less tripped-up by his cases or his emotions, and a Watson who falls behind more often. But it is also very faithful to their dear love for one another, and I simply cannot hate an adaptation that retains that! More than anything, I'm grateful to have a version of them that feels close to the original but still brings something lovely and unique to the table.

I hope this changed some minds about these films, because I absolutely adore them!

#basil rathbone #nigel bruce #rathbone holmes #sherlock holmes

[kamisama1kiss]

Okay okay, hear me out…what if the reader was a ninja part of the team but they would also be involved in a prophecy where they end up dying to save their lover, I need the ninja reaction to when Master Wu tells them 🫶🏻

This is actually so sad, tho.... I love it! 🤭😝 I was a little stuck on writing, but I hope I was able to deliver what you wished for 😚🫶

~~~

What would be the ninjas reactions be as the prophecies says they're lover will die for them?

~Lloyd Garmadon~

- Denial is a river in Egypt. Refusing to believe that they would die for the sake of his life.

- No matter how many times he convinces himself, he knows truly he can't do anything to stop it. Further pushing him into no limits of getting stronger to maybe, just maybe prevent it?

- Keeping a watching eye at you at all times to see if you're safe, more so in battles or training.

- Would try to convince you to do other tasks rather than join the team if he knew it could be risky for either you or himself.

- Consently tries to spend as much time with you so that when the time comes, he could make sure to not regret a moment.

- Would often spend time silently watching you just live and socialise with others, his heart falling into his stomach.

- Admiring you and everything about you as a person.

~Kai Smith~

- At first, he just laughed and shook his head. There was no way.

- After maybe a few hours or days, the gravity of it all dawned on him. He couldn't help but feeling so hopeless and useless to not be able to help or postpone it or anything for that matter.

- His mind of having a feature together with you was immediately crushed, all the plans of being able to hold you at night and talk into the long hours of the night.

- In the meantime, he changed a little for you as in allowing you to goof around with his hair as an example.

- Holding hands no matter where you walked to feel you close just to know you weren't gone. Not yet at least.

-Knowing he was absolutely broken after when Nya was gone, he would be just the same with just worse of completely letting guilt eat him up in silence. He would refuse to let anyone know how he felt.

As the hothead, he is the practice dummys would be all burnt to crisp

~Cole Brookstone~

- Again?

- Really? First, his own mother. Now, the one person he loves with the whole being of himself

- No matter how much he tried to collect himself, he could easily take it out on training.

- Would at some point start to distance himself from you so when the time came, the impact would be less painful.

- Didn't want to be like his father with absolutely neglecting everything when you we're gone, but anyhow, he tried to smile to everyone and act chill like he usually would.

- Often held his breath when holding you close, wishing for these types of moments to never end.

~Zane Julian~

- He was obvious to the fact that the one he loves could so easily die, but he could live on for many years on.

- Has already been over this with himself, but hearing it being sooner than expected shocked him.

- Acting no different than normally maybe a few occasional more hugs throughout the day, nothing too out of the ordinary.

- When he was alone, his way of grief was meditate. Maybe it could make the damage a little easier for his wires to handle?

- Occasionally turning off the emotions to just feel as if he could "breath" as it did get to his head at times more than he'd like to admit it ever did.

~Jay Walker~

- Immediately lost himself as he shook his head, refusing to belive what a dumb scroll had to say! It's dumb right?

- Spending every waking minute of his day with you by his side, alongside helping you with everything he could think of.

- Coping with occasionally stealing shirts with your smell on them to feel as if you mext to him, even though you are just a few doors down or so

- Would slowly communicate with others as he became more silent, which scared everyone. Everyone stood on their toes around him to not further upset him.

- He came in clutch and used every single excuse possible to man kind to have you for himself the first week or two after getting to know. He felt kind of pushy so he calmed down a little.

~Nya Smith~

- She genuinely just accepted it, what more could she say? The prophecy says so, she cannot deny it no matter how much this frustrated her.

- Checking up on you and acting for the most sake normal, as to not make you uncomfortable or worried for her sake.

- Used any or all frustration on training her powers in different ways, which was beneficial for her in the long right?

- Just like her brother, there was no communication from her side. Whenever the topic of prophecy popped up, she went silent and stood next to you, holding pinkys.

- Would cry to herself whenever everything got to her, just knowing you're gonna to eventually leave it snapped her multiple times. She would always refuse.

~~~

I've reached over 25 posts :00 and also over 50 followers!!! THANK YOU, EVERYONE 😭🙏🙏 I appreciate every single one of you so much

#headcanons #lego ninjago #ninjago #lloyd garmadon x reader #ninjago headcanons #kai smith x reader #ninjago lloyd garmadon #cole brookstone x reader #ninjago kai smith #ninjago cole brookstone #ninjago jay walker #jay walker x reader #zane julien x reader #ninjago zane julien #nya smith x reader #ninjago nya smith #headcanons lloyd garmadon #headcanons nya smith #headcanons jay walker #headcanons come brookstone #headcanons kai smith #headcanons zane Julian #ask #ninjago requests #request #reqs open

[vickyvicarious]

The structure of this entry makes it even sadder than it already is. There are four entries in one, here, and what that implies about the timeline really gets to me.

Jonathan sees the people camping in the courtyard and feels hope. Initially maybe even that other people could help him escape outright, before he tamps that down to a more reasonable message getting out (which still could hopefully bring rescue at some point). He tries to speak to them through the window, but the communication barrier only allows gesticulating. He decides to write the letters.

I imagine he does so in a relative hurry. But before he tries to send them out the window he returns to his diary to scribble out a quick note on what he's written and why. Perhaps he's waiting for a seal to dry or something, or maybe he's hesitating before sending them. But he's clearly in a great deal of suspense and trying to act quickly.

He gets someone's attention, throws the letters and some money out the window (to pay for mailing them and perhaps also as a tip for their help?) then quickly hurries back to the study. (Back to implies he was there before, perhaps when he wrote his first entry? Maybe he tried to speak to them, when it didn't work went to the study, then back to his room when he decided to write letters?) He's trying to act like nothing has happened, staying where Dracula can easily see him 'acting normal.' But he is too excited to report what he's done, and since no one came to find him right away, he's taking the chance to note it down.

The last entry is longest and there's a big gap between the others and it. There is no more urgency to write at all, because what's the point? He waits until he is back in his room and has slept to write, even though he was left alone for a while in the study. He's no longer confident that Dracula won't catch him. He's also in deep despair at the horrible failure of his plan. In addition, he'll want to be even more protective of his diary. If Dracula were to see this, he'd recognize the symbols, and he'd probably burn it too. A terrible thought.

The rushed notes of the first three entries speak so much to the hope that Jonathan feels rising up. Even as he speaks of his worries about not succeeding or about frightening Mina, etc., he's obviously feeling hopeful. And the suspense is high, but by the third entry I think he actually believes he may have succeeded. Dracula didn't come rushing in right away, everything seemed calm, it might have worked...!

And then the last entry. He takes no risks writing it, waits till he is as alone as he can be. And his narration is so... dull. Jonathan doesn't describe his own emotions at all, until the line about being calm in despair at the very end. He simply repeats what Dracula said and did, and that he silently went along with it. Because he had no other choice.

And no hope.

#dracula daily #jonathan harker

[nalyra-dreaming]

Hey!

It'll be long post, so i understand if you decide to ignore it, sorry :)

You know, there were a lot of people that were convinced loumand kiss we saw in trailer was goodbye kiss, because of Louis' expression. I was one of them.

Turns out that it's NOT truth and everyone just accepted it and moved to talk how romantic it was and that apparently Louis just has this face when horny or whatever.

And I truly struggled to see it. And at first I felt incredibly guilty because I'm loustat shipper first, other ships appreciator second. I thought my mind doesn't let me see romance in other ship because I'm too loustat centric.

I tried to rewatch that scene and tried to brighten it up to see kiss and expression better (I'm sorry but while almost silhouette kiss is beautiful I'd prefer see character's expressions better in show like this, wish lighting was different)

But still! While during date Louis had more carefree and flirtatious expression, that kiss felt very off. I get that it's after talk about lestat but shouldn't he show more... Joy? Anticipation of more to come? Basically don't look like he does it because he HAS to.

So I thought, well, it CAN'T be jacob slacking, he's terrific at his job. And it can't be that I'm THAT biased, right?

So, let me tell you, I'm SO GLAD to found your post about this kiss! I saw too many people writing about Louis being fucked up to invite Armand to fuck after being threatened, that he loves them dangerous (he kinda does, but that's not the point), that he thinks only with dick, ignores red flags (again he does,but we talk about this particular moment) etc

He knows Armand is interested in him. He knows Armand has power. Armand technically didn't lay his hands on him but he COULD'VE and WOULD'VE if it's not for his affection to Louis.

I truly don't believe Louis viewed this as "I HAVE to kill Louis, you committed a crime, no hard feelings though, that's just my job! You know what?... You're cute so I'll let you go actually"

Maybe I give Louis too much credit but he's smarter than that. He also knows power play intimately, was on giving and receiving end countless times in his human and vampire life.

Add to it that tale Armand told about his old coven killing themselves when he actually threw them in fire. It was 100% to position himself as someone who has way less power over other vampires that he actually does. I don't believe coven can pressure Armand into ANYTHING. And glimpses of him abusing his power over Claudia prove it (CONSENT TO LOOK IN THE EYES? ARE YOU SERIOUS?)

And Louis was THERE to witness all this and I absolutely believe he noticed it. That scene with dreamstat where lestat says he's the only one who Louis can trust made me think Louis is not as blind to Armands red flags as he appears.

And what we know about ep4 confirms it. Lestats "HA!" in museum already indicates that Armand is telling some bullshit and Louis at least subconsciously doesn't believe it. There's also scene in park from teaser "I want you" "You sure about that?" Maybe it's misleading or maybe it goes like this, guess we'll see

I wrote so much, again, i'm sorry.i just wanted to say, I agree so much with your post, and I hope crazy people in fandom already blocked you so you don't get any hate for pointing out that consent under threat of potential death is not really THAT consensual. Hope it won't be repeat about people attacking you like for post about hate sex in ep6

All good. And I wasn't, and I have seen I wasn't the only one clocking in on things (just reblogged a post wrt that).

Jacob is too good an actor to not show the fitting emotion if it was meant to be something positive. But he didn't.

The show went dark, real fast. And they're about to go even darker. A lot.

#Anonymous #ask nalyra #iwtv s2 #iwtv #amc iwtv #interview with the vampire #interview with the vampire s2 #amc interview with the vampire #interview with the vampire amc #iwtv amc

[rosedforbes]

I've been working on this for an embarrassing amount of time, but i finally mustered the courage to post it! this a gift for @galvanizedfriend , my favorite autor, moot, and dare I say friend, on tumblr! Yokan, I'll never stop saying that your fictions are the only thing keeping me sane at the moment, and they've always been a tiny lantern during some tough periods of my life. I really hope you'll like this little Drabble about Kleve 🙏

DISCLAIMERS: Eve is NOT my character, she's from Yokan's series The Wolf ! also, this is my first time ever writing a fan fiction, and English is not my native language, so please, have mercy.

maybe there's a god, after all.

That's the thought that has been crossing Klaus' mind for sixteen years ,every single time he looked at his little girl.

After his experience with Marcel, Klaus has realized that raising a child into his own reflection is not a smart move. In fact, if Eve had turned out like her father, it would've been the very end of the whole human - and inhuman - species. Luckily for everyone, his beautiful princess is essentially the mini version of the only woman who shares the custody of his immortal heart with her: Caroline.

They couldn't be more similar if they tried. Like mother, like daughter.

If it wasn't for some specific.details that Eve couldn't have taken from anyone but him, Klaus thinks that people would start questioning if Caroline made Eve by herself, without the contribution that is usually required to create another living creature.

Even if he's quite proud – and grateful — about how Eve's turned out just like her magnificent mother, Klaus can't help but smile when he witness the appearance of one those details he mentioned before: the fondness for art, the passion for swords duels — a voice in the back of his mind reminds him of something Caroline said about this specific factor, "it's called fencing, Klaus. You don't need to kill your opponent anymore to prove your victory." or something along those lines —  the constant presence of dark humor and sarcasm in any of her conversations, and her gigantic, stormy blue eyes that are accompanied by a pair of dimples and a wicked little smile whenever she got something on her mind.

That, is all him.

Something that Eve clearly hasn't taken from him though, is her way of showing emotions. Just like his wife, Eve wears her emotions like a second skin, which leads to her being a terrible liar. If she's happy, then the room will light up as soon as she enters it, and everyone can't help but be drawn to her joyful behavior. On the other end, if she's feeling sad, angry, or any other kind of negative emotion, then... Well, she would keep her mouth shut and open it just to make salty remarks, keeping an annoyed — yet adorable, if you ask him — little pout on her face.

That's how Klaus knows that something is wrong.

As soon as he sets foot in the compound, he's greeted by a very common view: Freya and Eve, sitting around the table of the living room, reading and chanting spells.

Normally, Klaus would walk towards them just to make them aware of his presence and to steal a kiss on his daughter's cheek as a brief salute, but he soon realizes that Freya is the only one writing down something in witch gibberish, while Eve is just quietly looking at her aunt, with a frowned expression all over her face.

His little wolf is so caught up on Freya's doing that she doesn't notice him until he's behind her, trying to understand what kind of spell his sister is casting, with a hand gently touching her shoulder. Eve tenses up at the touch, turning her head to look at him almost as fast as a regular vampire. As soon as she sees him though, she relaxes a little bit, offering him a tight lipped smile.

"Hey, Daddy," she says, voice so quiet and hoarse that he probably wouldn't have heard her if it wasn't for his vampirism. " 'm sorry, didn't hear you coming in."

Hearing Eve talking with such a tired and low tone makes his heart explode with concern. She's pure sunshine, hisdaughter, this cloud of negativity does not belong to her. Nonetheless, he tries to mask his thoughts with a tight lipped smile, looking down at Eve, "Don't worry, sweetheart," He says, moving his eyes to his sister, who hasn't left hers from the grimoires spread around the table even as he introduced himself, "Freya, care to explain what's happening or do I have to guess?" He asks with a tone that indicates nothing but irritation.

Freya finally looks up, if only to send him a not-so-friendly glare, but before she can snap right back at him, Eve takes word, looking at him like she's about to have a nervous breakdown "Apparently, I'm on house arrest until the Jury," she indicates Freya with her eyes, before turning her attention back to him, "tells me otherwise."  She concludes, and the exasperation of her tone is almost touchable.

Klaus arches his brows in confusion, his gaze switching between Eve and Freya, as to ask for one of them to elaborate what he just heard.

It's Freya the one that, with a sigh, steps in. "Some witches have been messing around with a kind of magic way too difficult for them to understand, leading to an imbalance that covers all New Orleans." She explains, rubbing her hands on her temples. "Long story short: right now, every witch in New Orleans is having trouble controlling their magic, especially the younger ones like Eve. In addition, being the tribid gives her an enormous amount of power which is hard to control on a good day, so it's better if we keep her under control, in a limited and safe space."

Eve rolls her eyes as soon as Freya concludes, shifting her position to show him the magic-restraining bracelet on her wrist. "I haven't seen this freaking bracelet in years. I thought I was finally free, but no, some dumbass witch thought it was a good idea to mess with something way too big for them to understand, turning me into a fu-"

"Language." Both Klaus and Freya interrupts her, giving Eve a warning look.

she glares at both of them, visibly annoyed.

Christ, Klaus thinks, he's losing points as the cool parent.

"turning me into a freaking bomb." she grumbles, looking down at the pages of the grimoires.

Klaus takes a long sigh, pulling out his phone from his pocket to send a message to Caroline and the rest of the family. It takes all of his willpower to not storm out and look for this gang of inconsiderate witches, accompanied by nothing but his fury, showing them the treatment that is reserved specifically to the ones that put his daughter in a bad mood, but he recognized the fact that this situation is already unsteady, and there is no space for his impulsiveness, yet.

"Dad?" Eve says, looking at him with an arched eyebrow, like she's expecting something from him. "Are you still here? You haven't threatened anyone since you heard of this, and it's more concerning than a bunch of low-level witches messing around." She concludes.

Well, the sarcastic remarks are only funny when they're not directed at him.

"Trust me, Eve, I have lots to say, but none of it is appropriate in the presence of a child." he retorts, switching his attention back to Freya. "I've sent a message to Caroline and to our siblings, they should all be here in about 40 minutes."

Freya simply nods, gathering all the magic stuff from the table. "I'll call Vincent." she stands up, giving a kiss on Eve's head. "I'm pretty sure he's more informed than us at the moment. Besides, another witch would be helpful."

"what am I? a ghost?!" Eve snaps when Freya disappears in her own bedroom. "I can't use magic, I'm on house arrest, this handcuff is back around my wrist and I haven't even had my daily bignets!" she explains desperately, curling on herself, resting her chin and arms over her knees.

Klaus can't help the low chuckles coming out of his mouth, something that earns him a dirty look from his little wolf.

"I'm glad you find my misery amusing. Father of the year, really." Eve says, enunciating her pout even more.

"Not at all, sweetheart. To be completely honest, I would love nothing more than to go fetch those witches myself and show them what happens when someone dares to upset my daughter," Eve promptly rolls his eyes at that, but he sees how she's trying to bite back a smile.

"However, Your mother would eviscerate me if my impulsiveness took place in a delicate situation such as this one."

"Then what do we do while waiting for mom to come home?" Eve says, and truth to be told, patience has never been a strong suits of her.

"Well, I did get that new painting set you've mentioned lately." He says with a grin, observing how Eve's pout changes to a wide smile between record time.

"The pink one?"

"Do you even have to ask?"

"You're the best!" she chirps, jumping from her chair to wrap her arms around his waist, the bad mood evaporating completely from her body. Klaus can't help but smile when he looks down at his daughter, holding her close to him. Oh, how he wishes time would stop, just to remain like this for at least a decade, with his little girl safe, sound and happy in his arms, where no bad intentions can reach her.

"Come on, sweetheart," He says, grabbing her hands "let's see if those colors actually blend on their own." he concludes with a wink, leading her towards the art studio. He knows this happiness is going to be short-lived, but the least he can do is to keep Eve's mind occupied, distracting her from the stress of this situation. As he enters the room, Klaus notices that he's running out of dark red acrylic.

Well, it appears those witches are going to be useful, after all.

#how DO YOU EVEN TAG THIS STUFF #this is kinda embarrassing #let's see how im going to feel about this tomorrow morning #CHECK YOKAN'S AO3 PAGE RIGHT NOW #best autor out there hands down #drabble #fanfiction #oneshot #klaroline #klaroline drabbles #klaroline fanfiction #klaus mikaelson #caroline forbes #freya mikaelson #eve forbes mikaelson #the vampire diaries #the originals #the wolf universe

[chaosduckies]

Restoration (Chapter 11)

The time has come! This took me about five drafts for me to actually think it was decent so I hope you guys enjoy it! There’s just a whole lot of little scenes I liked to make. It’s a roller coaster of emotions, you’re going to hate me but it gets better! (Please don’t hate me I will not hesitate to cry TwT) Otherwise, enjoy!

Word Count: 12.7k

CW: Death, Vague mentions of suicide, severe trauma, vague gore warning, violence, I think that’s it!

11- Ryker 

It was quiet without Angela and Lucky. Mostly because Dylan and Lucky are almost always the cause of all the loud noises, but sometimes Angela and Isabelle just liked to play around. Now, it was lonely. Of course Nathan always let Angela talk with us on his phone for hours since we can always see Lucky at school, but Angela was being picked up by Nathan for almost a full week. Nathan says she’s been doing fine. She plays some games with his mom and he likes playin hide and seek with her when she’s bored. As for Lucky, Nathan says he’s just been doing his own thing. What he usually does. He also says that he’s on the phone with Dylan all the time too. Not surprising. 

No worries though. They’ll be back before Christmas. There was no way I was letting them miss it. Plus, the riots and stuff have been going down lately. They can finally come home, and I really, really missed them. No matter how many times I’ve had to clean up after them or they’ve given me half a heart attack every time they’re on the edge of somewhere high in the house. They were my siblings, I couldn’t just not care. 

Jasmine helped me take down all of the elevators around the house. The only bad part about that is that we can’t exactly put them back once they’re off, so it’s going to be like this until I can find the time to put some in later. They’ve never had a problem being carried around everywhere anyways. 

I sighed, laying down on my bed and staring at the ceiling. There wasn’t anything to do really. Dylan stayed in his room talking to Lucky while also playing whatever game he had, Jasmine was in the living room playing with Isabelle since no one else could at the moment. Usually Angela kept her busy. 

“Ry!” I heard Jasmine’s voice yell through my door. I groaned. I didn’t feel like getting up. I just laid down not too long ago, can I not get a break? 

“What!” I screamed back. 

“Isabelle says she’s hungry!” 

I placed a hand on my forehead, forcing my body under the covers. I was too tired to do anything, but I’m pretty sure we have some leftovers from last night she could eat. Jasmine and Dylan can make themselves something. I just wanted to get some sleep at this point. 

“There’s leftovers in the fridge!” 

I heard the fridge door open and close, then the microwave starting all the way from my room. I finally relaxed, the pillow cold under my head and my lights off with the blinds closed, blocking out any evening sun that threatened to creep inside my room. Perfect time to go to sleep. the best part about it was that I didn’t have school in the morning either. I was so physically and mentally exhausted I could just pass out. And I did. 

—————— 

When I woke up, it was to the smell of burnt pancake batter, making me scrunch up my nose and hurry to the kitchen, where Jasmine was currently throwing out her entire plate of pancakes that were beyond burnt. I laughed, watching her hurry to turn off the stove that was surprisingly not on fire. Jasmine just glared at me, leaning agianst the counter in defeat. I walked up next to her, smirking the entire time, “You just lost to pancake batter.” 

She playfully punched me in the shoulder, laughing along with me. I looked back at the box she had used, seeing that there was still enough for the four of us. I sighed, grabbing another bowl and placing the old one into the sink. Might as well make the rest if they really wanted pancakes. 

“Why’d you try cooking? You hate being anywhere near a stove.” I asked, mixing together the powder with milk. 

“You were asleep.” Her voice slightly a higher pitch. I looked back at her for a second, watching as she tapped her hand on the counter. 

“What else?” I grabbed a new pan that didn’t have burnt remains of pancakes and turned on the stove. Dylan knew how to cook a little bit. Jasmine would have woken him up to help her. So why didn’t she? 

“Nothing. Isabelle and I woke up about an hour ago and she just told me she was hungry.” Jasmine shrugged her shoulders. I poured some of the newly made batter into a pan and let it sit there for a couple seconds. She wasn’t going to tell me. At least not anytime soon. Better to just accept her answers now before she gets mad. 

I stayed silent until Dylan walked into the room, immediately sitting down on top of the counter and yawning. He scrunched up his nose, the faint smell of smoke in the air, “What did Jasmine burn this time?” He joked, earning a punch to the shoulder that actually looked like it hurt. 

Everyone grabbed their plates, and we all watched a cartoon in the living room. It just felt quiet without Dylan and Lucky constantly messing around with each other or Isabelle and Angela playing with their stuffed animals. I knew we all missed them. Just two more days. Two more days and they’ll be back with us. Everything was going to go back to normal. I’d really have to thank Nathan and his mom for helping us out so much. I smiled at the thought. 

———Nathan———

Despite there being two more people in the house, is was actually relatively quiet. Which was surprising given that Ryker’s house was usually filled with a huge commotion. Maybe it was because they were away from each other? I really did feel bad. I mean, they all seemed really close to one another. Plus after Ryker told me what happened to their parents… It must be hard. I couldn’t think about leaving my mom for any reason, so it must be so much worse when it’s your own siblings. 

They were going back this Sunday. Things have gone down and it’s nearly Christmas so I didn’t want them to miss that. Lucky was taking a nap on the couch while Angela was busy with a coloring book my mom had bought her the other day. She was currently coloring a picture of a parrot, and for a four year old she was surprisingly good at coloring. My mom was cooking dinner. I offered to do it instead but she just argued that she hasn’t cooked for me in a while. I just left it at that. 

So now I was laying down on the couch. School was out for winter break finally. Which meant only five more months until I would be left alone again. Just my mom and I. I didn’t plan on going to college, maybe just a part time job. After what happened so many years ago I’ve been afraid to live on my own. But let’s not think about that right now. 

What I was worried about was what if Ryker didn’t like the present I would be giving him. The concert tickets of course. They didn’t really cost much. Like a seventy dollars for two tickets? Not bad. I had bought everyone else’s gifts except for Dylan’s. I knew he liked sports and all that, but I couldn’t get him something like that. I had zero idea and I really needed to ask Lucky what to get him, because I’m pretty sure Lucky had bought something for him before he came here. I’d just have to ask. Not now though. 

I know Ryker loves reading, drawing, cooking. What else? Lucky mentioned something about sweets? Like cookies and all that? How would I even do that? I can’t just bake something fifty times my size. I had thought about buying something like a cake but how would I even get it to him? I mean… I could ask for help. Maybe from Jasmine? Nope. Get that thought out of my mind. She hates my guts. Dylan then? That would mean I’d have to ask him for a favor, and I didn’t really want to. But how else would I give Ryker a good gift? 

I guess that’s what I would do. But instead of buying one I’d ask Dylan to make it using my recipe. Would he though? I mean he seems like a nice guy. I guess the real question would be if I could be alone with him for about two hours. Or if could handle it at least. I’ve really only been around Ryker. 

——————

After we ate dinner, it was around 7 but Angela already looked exhausted. My mom set her to sleep in the guest room before leaving for work. I didn’t get why she always overworked herself. I knew she was tired too, but yet she stays awake almost all day to take care of us, and then leaves for work at night. When it was just me here as soon as she came back she’d give me a hug, take a shower, and then head to bed until it was later in the evening. I guess having more people in the house is making her think she has to stay up. I can take care of everyone. I didn’t mind playing around with Angela, I didn’t mind joking Lucky in a game, or going outside with everyone. I also didn’t mind cooking for more than just two people. So I didn’t exactly know why she stayed awake when she was so tired. 

“I can’t wait to head back home alreadyyyy.” Lucky groaned, the tv playing quietly in the background. He was on his phone while l sat reading a book as usual.  

“Sorry.” I mumbled, closing my book and turning my head to face the tv that was currently playing a movie about some cops trying to catch a serial killer or something like that. I wasn’t paying attention. 

Lucky stayed quiet for a while before facing me, “Sorry for what?” 

“That you have to stay here.” I answered. 

“It’s not even your fault. Plus, it’s not even bad here. I just miss being with my family, y’know?” Lucky explained, now facing the ceiling with his arms under his head. I nodded my head. I didn’t exactly know how he felt about this whole situation. I’m sure he realizes why he even has to be here. Because some people just don’t like humans. 

I opened my book again, trying to get at least halfway done with it before I fall asleep. At least that was my goal. Honestly I was extremely tired for no reason. I go to bed relatively early, and since I don’t have school anymore I’ve been waking up at around nine in the morning everyday. I didn’t know why I felt so exhausted. I wasn’t too worried though. I feel fine in the morning so it’s fine. 

“Can I ask you a question, Nathan?” Lucky asked, still staring at the ceiling. 

“Sure?” It came out more as a question. 

“Do you like Ryker?” 

My eyes widened. What kind of a question was that? “Yeah. He’s a nice friend. Why wouldn’t I?” Lucky started laughing, sitting up and now looking right at me, “I meant like, like him. Y’know, like a couple?” 

I felt my cheeks immediately heat up at the realization. Lucky started laughing so hard he was choking while I buried my face in my hands. This was embarrassing. I tried getting rid of the red blush that just seemed to be painted on me at this point. I groaned as Lucky caught his breath, still waiting on an answer, though I’m sure he’s already assume one. 

I’ve never really thought about it. I mean I do like him as a friend. He’s done nothing but help me ever since I’ve met him. I really do like being with him too. But do I really like him? I could just be mistaking it for liking him as a friend. That was probably it really. I don’t think I do. Nope. Plus, what makes anyone think that Ryker would like me back? It just didn’t make any sense. was he even into boys? Was I even into anyone? I’ve always thought that no one would want to be around me pretty much my whole life. I don’t know anymore at this point. Why were we even on the topic? 

“N-no. We’re just friends.” The blush on my face was still painted across my cheeks. Lucky just rolled his eyes, “Whatever you say.” 

I grabbed my book that I had lightly thrown on the cushion next to me and hid my bright red face in it. Just forget about it. Why would he ask that question anyways? It so random to ask. I was so unprepared too. There was no way I could just forget about this. 

———Ryker———

The cold air outside felt great. A thin layer of snow now covered the entire city from last nights little shower, and it just felt great to be outside. Today was going to be a good day. I could feel it. Today also happened to be the day that Lucky and Angela would be coming home with us, which we were all excited about. 

Jasmine had work today, and of course she was angry. It actually took me a while to clam her down so she wouldn’t be late for work. So now it was just Dylan and Isabelle with me as we headed to the bus stop to go and get them. I guess this counts as a family reunion? I mean, we haven’t really seen each other for nearly a week. It may not seem that long, but when all you have are your siblings, it’s not easy to let go of them. Let alone be apart from them for this amount of time. 

Nathan had already texted me that they were already waiting. Apparently his mom wanted to say goodbye to Angela because she grew attached to her. I wasn’t very surprised. They must be freezing though. I know this kind of weather is kind of amplified for humans too. My mind went back to that night that seemed like forever ago. When Nathan had just snuggled up as close as he wanted to me for warmth. My heart fell, and a small smile appeared on my face as we walked along the sidewalk. 

When we arrived at the bus stop, Lucky had practically ran as fast as he could to Dylan’s hand. Isabelle stayed in the back, smiling. I had told her before we had left to keep her distance from these two. Mainly because I had noticed how alert Nathan was when Isabelle was around. But that’s not something I should worry about now. 

I crouched down, watching a small four-year old girl stumble over the snow to get to me. I let down a finger for her to hang on to while I talked to Nathan and his mom, but I couldn’t help but notice how the woman standing next to Nathan flinched as soon as Angela had hugged my finger. Did she think I’d hurt my own sister? That-that can’t be it, right? 

“Thank you both so much. I don’t know what I would do if you hadn’t helped.” I slightly smiled, they smile back, “Oh you’re welcome! If you need help you can send them our way anytime!” His mother offered. She was the complete opposite of Nathan. She didn’t seem sheepish around me at all. So then why was Nathan so afraid? The thought snuck into the back of my mind, but I just pushed it aside. 

“Ready Angel?” I asked, waiting for her to nod her head, but instead she rushed over to Nathan’s mom, gave her a hug then hurried back. I chuckled, tilting my hand slightly for her to climb on herself. I turned to Nathan, who waved a little before quickly stuffing his hands into the pockets and scrunching up his jacket. Just as I called it, he was freezing. Maybe he wants to come with us for a little? I have to take them shopping since there was only a couple days until Christmas, and Dylan and Lucky still needed to find gifts. 

“Wanna come with us, Nathan? We’re just going shopping then heading back to my house.” I asked. He looked shocked before turning to his mom who nodded and whispered something to him. Nathan nodded his head with a smile on his face. I let my hand down again, watching him lift himself up on the first try, but still trip over thin air and fall. I would help him, but judging by the way he reacted a week ago when I was just trying to check up on him, I don’t think I really want to freak him out even more. 

I thanked his mom again for helping, and we left. Dylan and Lucky were catching up while we made our way to the small store where we usually go to. I handed Angela to Isabelle. She knew what to do and what not to do. I couldn’t imagine Isabelle ever hurting anyone or anything so it was fine. 

Behind me, Lucky and Dylan were laughing about something, and it made me kind of curious, but I didn’t want to bother them. Even if they spent hours talking on the phone and as much time together in school as they could, they still acted like they haven’t seen each other for years. That’s what happens when you let them share a room when they were younger. It wasn’t a bad thing though. Not at all. 

It wasn’t too early. Maybe about midday so it was a little warmer, but that didn’t stop me from worrying about the little ice cube in my palm that was shivering. Was he just sensitive to the cold? It would make sense. Not even Angela was, but then again she was wearing a thicker jacket. I slightly cupped my hand a little more, watching him adjust his position and bundle up a little more. My heart fell, I wish I could help more, but I was scared that he’d freak out again if I did anything more. The last thing I wanted was for him to be uncomfortable. 

“We’re almost there. You okay?” I asked worriedly, passing by some people on the sidewalk that seemed to be coming back from shopping themselves. A lot of them were carrying bags and wrapping paper. So people had the same idea as us.  

Nathan nodded his head, a slight smile on his face. Just a two more blocks. I looked back, seeing that Dylan was holding one of Isabelle’s hands and smirking right at me. Lucky was on his shoulder, and I’m guessing he was doing the exact same thing. I raised an eyebrow, making them both laugh. I rolled my eyes, turning to the huge parking lot coming into view. Surprisingly enough, there weren’t many cars. I guess it was a good thing we came relatively early. 

As soon as I entered the store, I was hit with warm air, slightly making it hard to breath for the split second I was under the heater. I stared down at Nathan, who looked relieved, but he still felt like an ice cube in my hand. Just give him some time. He looked like he was doing better already. A small smile involuntarily formed on my face. 

“Sooo it’s only Lucky and I picking out gifts today?” Dylan walked beside me. 

“Well yeah. If Isabelle and Angela want to get some things too.” I shrugged my shoulders, walking over to the sitting area where the small deli stand was. There weren’t too many people here, and I was just kind of here to make sure everything would be okay. I needed to get gifts too, but I just need to go pick them up when the order is done.  

“Alright. We won’t be long.” Dylan grabbed Isabelle’s hand again, asking her and Angela if they wanted to go pick out gifts for everyone. I laughed when they both cheered. Meanwhile, I let Nathan down on the table. It took him a while to catch his balance, but he just sat back down on the table instead of the human-sized table on top. It’s not like I minded though. We’ve shared a desk together since the start of school anyways. 

“Feeling better?” I asked, holding my head up with one of my hands. 

“Y-yeah,” He stuttered, playing with his hands, “Why’d you w-want me to come a-anyways?” 

I shrugged my shoulders, “Why not? You could have said no if you didn’t want to come.” 

He thought about his response for a bit, “Thank you.”  

I was a bit surprised. Why was he thanking me? What did I do for him? Get him out of the house? I was about to ask what for, but I wasn’t going to. He probably has his reasons. Whatever’s going on in his mind I guess. But I could say I was grateful that he said yes. I would have probably just been on my phone while waiting for Lucky and Dylan to pick out gifts. It gets boring. 

Crowds of people were leaving and some were entering. Every time someone had passed by us I couldn’t help but notice Nathan inch closer to me. Right. It’s been a while since we’ve really hung out I forgot he doesn’t really do well when other people are near him for whatever reason. I used my free hand to hide him from everyone’s sights. Maybe he’s just reticent. It wouldn’t be shocking. No offense! 

“Um, what are you doing for Christmas?” I tried taking his mind off of whatever was going on in there. He slightly flinched, then shook his head like I had just brought him back to reality, “Ah, um, reading? We… We don’t r-really do Christmas. Just hand each other gifts and th-that’s it.” He smiled like that’s normal. Then again, as far as I know it was only him and his mom. Still, it must be pretty sad that the doesn’t really celebrate. 

“That’s it?” I looked at him sadly as he nodded his head. Usually we just kind of decorate together, which was why I hadn’t even set up the tree yet, but then Dylan and I make dinner, and we just open gifts. It’s not like this big thing though. It used to be when my parents were still here. 

“If you want to you can celebrate with us. You don’t need to get us gifts or anything either.” I offered, making him laugh. A confused look was plastered on my face before he explained, “I kinda… already have g-gifts for you all.” 

I blinked a few times. That I was not expecting. When? Why? Why did he get us all gifts? He didn’t have to. Now I kind of feel bad that he actually spent money on us. Did he get one for everyone? I think he did. 

“Huh? W-why?” I was at a loss for words. Of course I bought him something, and I really hoped he liked it, but now I have to worry if it’ll be equal to whatever he bought for me. My initial plan was to surprise him with it, but apparently he had the same idea. I just hoped that it wasn’t anything crazy expensive because then I’d really feel bad. 

“You’ve all b-been really nice to m-me,” He started, “Oh yeah! I still d-don’t have anything for Dylan. D-do you mind helping me?” 

“I mean, yeah of course, b-but how did you even…?” I was confused. How did he get presents if he’s… vertically challenged. Our size difference limits us a lot so how did he even buy gifts if they’d be fifty times bigger than himself? Even we struggle with that which explains why we all go Christmas shopping at different times with Lucky since Angela can’t walk into a human-sized store by herself. 

“I haven’t b-bough them yet. I actually need y-your help with that too.” He laughed nervously. Now that makes more sense. I just nodded, smiling. Nathan was too good of a friend for me. I wasn’t expecting anything honestly. I would definitely give him a hug if I didn’t think he’d be afraid. 

——————

I gave Nathan a list of everything Dylan was into, even the embarrassing stuff that only his family knows about, but I trust Nathan not to tell anyone. Eventually he found something and sent it to me to make sure. It was a poster of one of his favorite actors, signed and everything apparently. Dylan absolutely loves watching movies. Even the old ones made thirty years before he was even born. I don’t know where Nathan found that at, but oh my gosh if all the gifts are like that I am going to feel so bad that mine won’t even be comparable to his. 

Right on time, Dylan and all of them came back with bags in their hands. We all left and walked back to our house. Like I said, today was a good day. 

———Nathan———

Today really was a good day. I have no idea why I had thought that hits morning, but obviously it wasn’t lying to me. It’s been a while since I’ve hung out with Ryker, so of course I said yes to his invitation. Before I left my mom just whispered for me to go, like she was going out to do something as well. I knew she took off work today as well so obviously something was happening there. But I completely forgot about it while I was at Ryker’s house. 

It was already getting late. The sun just barely peaking out over the horizon. There was a light snow outside, covering the already frosted ground outside. It was nice and warm inside, with the heater on and slightly blowing right on me. I was snuggled up near the windowsill in the living room, blanket on top of me and staring outside watching the sun go down. Ryker was helping his siblings wrap gifts, so it was just me for now. It was surprisingly quiet except for the faint crinkling of wrapping paper. 

The front door opened wide, letting in cold air that slightly stung my face. I peaked my head around the wall that obstructed my view, seeing a girl with long, curly black hair with a few dark purple streaks walk into the house, carrying a two bags and a uniform that looked like it belonged to a gas station. I guess Jasmine was working or something? Either way, I pressed myself up father into the corner, trying not to be seen by her. She scares me. Even if Lucky said she’s a lot nicer than she’s been to me, I don’t exactly think she’ll ever like me. 

“Ry! I’m home!” She screamed from across the house. I stayed under the blanket, staying hidden. I have a feeling the second she sees me she’ll start asking questions or threaten me. Luckily, she didn’t see me, and instead headed off to her room, soon followed by the sound of the shower starting. 

Ryker walked back into the room, grabbing something off from a table and leaving again. Then everyone had started bringing in the now wrapped presents and placing them on the on the floor. Ryker came back with a box and set it down beside the couch. I forced myself to crawl a bit closer to see what they were doing. Setting up a Christmas tree. I’m guessing they had the ornaments in the box too. 

“Alright, you guys go crazy.” Ryker laughed, opening up the box and walking to the couch by the windowsill I was currently sitting down at. He sat down, sighing and turned to check on me. I flashed a smile, earning one back. 

I watched as Dylan set up the tree for everyone while Isabelle quickly grabbed some white streamers and draped all over the tree messily. My attention was turned to the still form on the couch next to me. Ryker’s chest slowly fell and rose, his eyes closed and covered up in the blanket. He looked comfortable… 

Was he asleep? Probably. I would too if I had to keep up with this many people. Was it hard? Well no duh, Nathan. He always looks tired when he’s at school. Should I leave now then? I didn’t want to wake him up when I had to go. I would feel terrible. Actually, now would be a great time to ask Dylan about getting Ryker an extra gift in case he won’t like the one I have for him. The only problem is mustering up the courage to even talk to him. Alone. I think it’d be fine though. It’s only for a little bit until I can eventually make this. 

It took them around twenty minutes to place all of their ornaments on the tree, but they did. None of them dared to wake up Ryker after they were done either. Jasmine walked into the room, dressed up in white sweatpants and a sweater. She walked up to Ryker, rolling her eyes with a smile on her face before she noticed me. Her smile disappeared as she glared at me. I sank back, burying myself in the blanket. What did I do to her? 

She averted her attention to the tree, smiling and talking with both Isabelle and Angela. Thanking them for helping with the tree and then continued to play around with Angela in her hands. No wonder she threatened me so much when she had to watch Angela leave. Jasmine was really attached to her. Kind of like my mom. 

“Boo!” I physically jumped, my heart racing from the scare. I looked behind me, seeing Lucky laughing, nearly choking. Dylan was also laughing, but I just smiled. Where did he even come from? 

“Oh my gosh you should have seen your face!” Dylan let out a hand for me to help me get on my feet. It took me a while to balance myself from sitting down for so long, but I managed. 

“You want to get out of here for a bit?” Lucky asked just as soon as Dylan offered an open palm. I stared at it, wide-eyed. I really only trust Ryker to hold me, but I guess this won’t be so bad. 

“Sure.” Lucky grabbed my wrist as we walked on, and for the first time in my life I didn’t trip and fall on my face embarrassingly. Okay, so I had help this time but one day I’ll be able to do it on my own. Hopefully. Or maybe I won’t even have to. 

Dylan took us to his room, where there were tons of posters of games and a little tv stand with a shelf full of some books that he probably needed for school and some games along with VHS tapes. I was honestly really surprised by the place. I don’t know why expected there to be sporty things like weights and basketballs. Y’know. What athletes have. 

There was a bedside dresser with a few human-sized things on it which I was guessing was Lucky’s temporary room. I was guessing these two just shared a room since his other room wasn’t at all filled with things. Just a few clothes and a dresser. I’m guessing everything else was here. 

Lucky and I were set down on the dresser while Dylan sat down on his bed. Lucky gave me a short tour of his own little room before letting me sit down on his bed while he sat in a chair. It was quiet for a second before Jasmine’s voice screamed from the other room, “Lucky!” 

He groaned in response while Dylan snickered, letting lucky onto the floor. It was just the two of us now. I waited until I saw Lucky leave before trying my hardest to calm down before I had a actually tried to talk to Dylan by myself. I could when there were people around. What’s so different this time? I had no one to save me if I said the wrong thing. 

“Oh hey, I’ve been meaning to ask you what you got Ryker for Christmas. Lucky told me you had something good.” Dylan spoke first, a grin on his face. Well I already told Lucky, so if I don’t tell Dylan he’ll just end up telling him. There was no point in hiding it. 

“C-concert tickets.” I answered, hoping he could hear. I was guessing he did by the reaction. His eyes went wide and his jaw slightly opened wide in shock. 

“That one band he’s absolutely crazy for?” 

I nodded my head. Not the way I would word it. I actually kind of find it funny how much Ryker loves that band. I forgot the name, but he’ll remind me when I show him the tickets. 

“Oh my gosh he’s gonna to go crazy.” Dylan laughed. Does that mean he’ll like it? If that’s so then I don’t need to ask for help. This makes my life so much easier. I’m so glad I don’t have to ask for any favors. It’s not exactly a grate first impression to immediately ask for something. I let out a sigh of relief.

——————

I didn’t leave the house until about an hour after Ryker woke up. It was close to midnight, but it’s not like I’m some little kid who has a bed time. Heck, we don’t even have school tomorrow so it really didn’t matter. 

When I arrived home, my mom was asleep on the couch, the tv playing The Golden Girls per usual and the blanket halfway on the ground. I smiled to myself, pulling the blanket over her and turning up the heater. She was freezing. I headed to my room, grabbed a pair of clothes, took an extremely hot shower, and buried myself under the blankets. Things were going great. Maybe life really didn’t hate me all that much. 

———Ryker———

It was Christmas Day. The day everyone was waiting for. Especially Angela and Isabelle who woke me up at six in the morning to wish everyone in the house a merry Christmas. I admit, I was just the slightest bit annoyed, but that was because I went to bed late at night cleaning up and setting up gifts. I also had to take out some food to defrost for later. 

This morning was a huge mess. Even if we weren’t really doing anything until later, I still had to go pick up a few things before. The day before I helped Nathan with the gifts he had bought, which by the way he ordered online (I don’t know how I didn’t think about this sooner) I wrapped the one’s I could while he wrapped the other two that belonged to Lucky and Angela. I was honestly surprised at how thoughtful he was. He even bought one for Jasmine and I know for a fact that Jasmine would absolutely love it. Although she doesn’t like to admit it, she absolutely loves stuffed animals. I just don’t know how he even knew. Was he just guessing? Then I also noticed that he was hiding mine from me. I wondered what it could be, but I would find out later today. 

I also had to go pick him up today, but that wasn’t my priority right now. I planned on going early in the morning, but the snow was coming down pretty heavy so I had to wait. I wouldn’t have minded heading out there, it’s just I didn’t want to get sick. I rarely do, but when it does happen, it’s terrible. So now it was almost four in the afternoon, only about two hours before all the stores started closing. Just barely making it in time to go pick up the cake Jasmine had ordered. Why she didn’t get it herself? I had zero idea. I would have made her get it if she hadn’t been half asleep. 

Once in the store, the sweet smell of strawberry and chocolate filled my nose. Curse my sweet tooth. Where did she even find this place at? It was like in the middle of nowhere, yet it looked so nice inside and smelled delicious. A woman walked up to the counter, her apron dressed in icing and batter. 

“Hi! Did you have an order?” She smiled, ready to tap away at the screen in front of her. 

“Oh, um, I think it’s under the name Jasmine?” I replied, not being able to take my eyes off of the amazing looking cookies that were displayed. 

“Yup! Let me just go get the box.” She left the room. Jasmine purposely made me come get this. She was doing something at home, and she thought she could distract me. Damn it it’s working. 

The woman came back with a white box and typed something in the computer before l grabbed the box, and I guess she saw me looking at the displays because she just laughed, “I’ll give you a small box for free. How’s that sound?” 

“Yes please.” I almost immediately replied, laughing along with her. I swear if Jasmine makes fun of me for this when I get home… I was handed another small box while I thanked the lady and left. 

When I walked in the house, Jasmine was waiting right at the front door, a huge smirk on her face. I glared at her. 

“Why the extra box?” She could barely hold in her snicker. I rolled my eyes, “Shut up. You’re not getting any.” I stuck my tongue out immaturely, while she tried reaching for the extra box I was holding just above my head. She gave up about two minutes later, snatching the cake from my hands and muttering something as she made her way to the kitchen. 

I looked at the time, reading six thirty already. Now would be a good time to go quickly pick up Nathan. I gave him a quick text, placed the box of cookies in my room, and went back out. 

——————

It only took me about half an hour to walk over there and back. Everyone knew Nathan was coming, and I don’t think I’ve ever been more excited. I mean, he’s never had a real Christmas according to him, so I’m glad I can at least give him the opportunity. Even if we aren’t family or anything, I think it’s a nice change of things. Plus, afterwards the younger ones go to bed while the rest of us stay up a little longer and go to our separate rooms. Really I was the only one alone because Jasmine falls asleep almost immediately. Nathan was actually staying the night, and not in the human accommodating house. I didn’t want him to be alone so I had offered to make a little space for him in my room. He agreed. 

So now we were at the house, Nathan sitting down in my room away from the chaos happening. I was cooking, Dylan clearing the middle of the living room for later, Jasmine keeping the little ones busy, Lucky was taking a shower. Things were going great surprisingly enough. This was only the second time time we’ve celebrated without our parents, so I was expecting something to happen, but everyone seemed happy. The first time was hard for us, and we barely even wanted to celebrate, but it’s what our parents would have wanted, so we kept on going. 

The food was relatively done, I just needed to go get some plates and get everyone in here. I went to my room, finding Nathan sitting on the makeshift bed I made out of some soft cloth I cut off of one my hoodies. What? I don’t used that one anymore. I would have been more than happy to let him on my bed and I sleep on the floor (I’m sure he was terrified just as much as I was about what could happen if we slept on the same bed) but I figured he’d feel bad, so I tried to make it as comfy as possible. 

“Sorry for just leaving you here. I wasn’t sure if you’d be okay with the chaos happening in the other room.” I explained, offering a hand. He shook his head, stepping on and falling forward yet again. He’ll get it at some point. Hopefully. 

“It’s fine.” He replied, groaning as he sat back up. 

Lucky was already making the three of them a plate. I don’t really know where he learned how to do it, but he just did. I wasn’t complaining. It was less work for me anyways. As soon as everyone had their plate, we ate around the coffee table, laughing and sometimes messing around with one another. Jasmine had brought up the cookies again before I lightly slapped her shoulder. 

Once we all finished eating, it was time for presents, which I handed out to everyone. Nathan told me to let everyone know to open the present he gave them last just so he knows how much they would all really like it. I just went along with it, so now everyone was kind of excited. I opened mine, getting one of the hoodies I had shown Jasmine just a few days ago. From Dylan a pair of new headphones since my old ones broke sadly. Lucky bought me some new markers since my old ones were dry. Isabelle and Angela combined their gifts and gave me a little picture frame of both of them (My heart was melting) that I would definitely be placing on the tv stand later. 

It was weird for me since I didn’t have a physical gift from Nathan, and I didn’t really know how to react to that. Just what did he get me? I was so confused, but I waited patiently. I’m sure I’d love whatever it is either way. 

Everyone was done opening their gifts, only left with one. Nathan jumped when all the attention was on him, visibly trembling. I stepped in for him. “Jasmine should go first.” I grinned. She rolled her eyes, grabbing the box I had stuffed the gift in. 

“Like this is gonna be good…” She mumbled. I elbowed her side while Nathan looked down a little sadly. Just wait… 

As soon as she had opened it, her jaw nearly dropped. She glared at me for a split second before turning back to the adorable looking teddy bear. She hates admitting it, but she loves those kinds of things. 

“Okay, maybe you’re not so bad after all.” She smiled at him for the first time ever. 

“My turn!” Isabelle and Angela both opened theirs at the same time, revealing a matching set of clothes. I had to cover my ears from the high pitched squeals. Nathan laughed, covering his ears too. 

Lucky opened his, a game that he’s been wanting for forever. He hugged Nathan, he flinched at the contact, but either way hugged him lightly back. Dylan followed, confused at what his could be before he opened it up all the way and stuttered, struggling to find what to say. 

“H-how did you…” He looked over the me, but I just shrugged and smirked. 

“You are literally the best.” Dylan laughed, folding the paper back up. 

We all laughed, including Nathan who was walking closer to me, waiting on the edge. Was he waiting for something? Oh! I let me hand out, seeing him use my thumb to help him balance so he didn’t embarrass himself in front of everyone. I brought him closer, confused the entire time as he pulled out his phone, and seconds later my own phone going off. He pointed at his as I hurried to pull mine out, and nearly dropped my phone when I saw the pictures he sent. 

“You’re kidding, right?” I felt my face heat up slightly, watching him shake his head and laugh a bit. I did a double take before covering my mouth with my free hand. 

“Told you he’d love it!” Dylan smiled. 

I absolutely do yes. 

“I-I, um, wasn’t sure if you’d like it.” 

“Are you kidding? This is literally the best thing you could have ever given me.” I laughed, trying my hardest to hide the blush on my face, but it was too late because everyone was laughing except for Angela and Isabelle. Including me. Oh my gosh this was so much better than my gift to him. How was I even going to compare to his? 

I looked to Lucky, who nodded his head and grabbed it really quickly before I even let Nathan back onto the table. Lucky handed it to him and pointed at me. Nathan started opening it, stopping halfway as he tried to figure out what it was. It wasn’t anything too special. Just a picture frame of the two of us. A picture we had taken a long time ago when we had to share classes. The same day that we hung out together for the first time. 

“It’s not anything special. I’m not the best at picking gifts, but I hope you like it.” 

I was surprised when he hugged it close to his chest and looked like he was about to cry. 

“Awww.” Lucky joked around. I couldn’t help but notice the slight blush on his cheeks. He loved it. 

We cleaned up, had the younger kids go to sleep and Jasmine. Dylan and Lucky were in their room watching a movie, while my door was closed along with my curtains. The only light was coming from the dim lamp I had on my desk. I let Nathan down on the nightstand. We were both changed into something more comfortable. So now it was just the two of us. 

“I can’t believe you bought me tickets.” I exasperated, still in shock. 

“Well yeah. You’re really nice to me, help me out a whole lot.” 

I turned to face him, a slight smile on my face, “Really? I feel like you’re the one always helping me.” He nodded his head. It went silent for a bit before I decided to break it, “Are you tired?” Honestly, I was exhausted, but I was willing to keep Nathan company until he fell asleep. 

“Mmm… yeah.” He replied, already under a blanket. I chuckled lightly, gettin under my own, “Good night then.” 

“Good night, Ryker.” I heard him reply. I’ve rarely heard him say my name before, and I don’t know why my face started heating up. 

Four days later.

———Nathan———

Everything was going so great. The Christmas party at Ryker’s was amazing. Even the few days before that it was great just the be with everyone. My mom was happy, I was happy. Life was finally turning around for me. For the first time in years I finally felt like I could actually have a normal life. I had friends, I was going to graduate in five months. Everything was looking all up for me. 

So why did it get flipped back around? 

My mom and I were just going to go buy fireworks. Just the small ones. Nothing too huge. That’s all we wanted. This was really the only thing we truly celebrated together since it marked the start of the a new year. It marked that we could restart our lives over again. We loved watching the many colors paint the sky. That’s all we wanted. And we couldn’t have it. 

We were just in the wrong place at the wrong time I guess? Because everyone just acted like nothing had happened. That everything was going to be fine and okay. But it wasn’t. Nothing was “fine and okay.” I had really thought that maybe my life was finally turning around for the better just like my mom’s had, but no. I can never have anything nice just once. Just once I wanted something nice. And I couldn’t have it. Just like the fireworks we couldn’t have. 

The store we were shopping at was relatively empty. Only a few people here and there. The only thing about it was that it was really close to the giant part of the city. That was all we were wary about. But we brushed it off. After all, we would only be there for about an hour then head back home. 

“Ooo these look nice, right?” My mom picked up a tiny pack. I smiled, holding out the basket I was holding and let her place it in along with the two other tiny packs we had. We had continued looking, not at all aware of the large tremors that only grew more and more. And neither did the other people in the store. We all had just thought it was some unaware giant walking across the street. If only that were true. 

The next thing we know, there’s screaming outside, we heard people fighting, we were rushed outside so we didn't get hurt, but we shouldn’t have ran outside. Two giants were fighting right in the open. Brutally at that. One had a very muscular build while the other was built, but not as muscular as the guy on top of him, laying punches in the face. People tried to break up the fight, but it only grew worse, and soon enough, the giants decided to bring humans into it. The one that was being pouched in the face continuously had tried to reach practically anything he could, and that just so happened to be a human-sized tree from a nearby park. Right where my mom was standing dialing 911. 

I mean, what are the chances of that? It seemed like a made up lie, but it wasn’t. Trust me, I’ve tried my hardest to convince myself that it wasn’t real, that there was no way my mom would just be standing there and it just so happens that the giant would try reaching for the tree right next to her. Hah! It was ridiculous, right? I only wished I wasn’t telling the truth. 

I stood in fear as I heard her scream at the top of her lungs while in the giant’s fist which was also holding the huge tree that looked minuscule in his hand. I couldn’t move. My mom was there. Getting hurt. And all I could do was stand and watch. 

Eventually help did come, all the other humans had gone away except for the few that actually cared about what happened with my mom. I knew I was, because as soon as the paramedics came to see how she was doing, I nearly started sobbing in front of so many people. I’ve seen her like this before. She’ll be okay. Just let her heal for a few weeks and she can come back home. Right? I wish that were true. I wish that we hadn’t even decided to go to that stupid store. I wished that she was standing right next to me. But she wasn’t. And now everything I’ve worked so hard to build up here in this city is just taken away. 

I stayed at the hospital, right next to my mom’s limp and weak body. The doctors were trying their hardest to keep her from… you can probably guess. Five broken ribs, a broken leg, and internal bleeding. I’m also pretty sure the doctor’s were hiding something from me, but I don’t know. She couldn’t breath well, and she winces every time she tries to move. Every time she wakes up she tells me to go home and get some rest. I tell her that I wasn’t leaving until she would be able to come home with me. 

Today was no different. She would wake up, struggle to sit up, and eat her breakfast while I stayed sitting on the little bench. The doctor’s let me stay the night. I guess they felt bad or something? I didn’t know, but I wasn’t leaving her here. My phone would go off at least two times a day. It was always Ryker. I’m guessing he had heard what had happened, but I really didn’t feel like talking. Not now when this was when my mom needed me most. 

“You should…. Eat…. Hon.” She had to take a few breaths between each word, which worried me, but the doctor’s would help with that. I believed it. 

“I’m okay mom. Don’t worry about me.” My voice was light and tired. I didn’t feel hungry, but I knew my body was. I hadn’t eaten since the day she came here which was about three days ago. School starts tomorrow, but they called and said I didn’t have to come back until two weeks.  

I refused to cry over this. If I did, then it would show that I’d given up. Mom always hated to see me cry. So I wouldn’t. I wouldn’t have to anyways since she would be coming back home with me. 

My phone started going off again. Everyday at exactly nine and six Ryker would call, and I would let it ring until he was sent to voicemail. I didn’t want to talk to anyone. I didn’t want to eat. I didn’t want to do anything but stay here with my mom and make sure she gets better. If she doesn’t then I don’t know what I would do. 

“Maybe… you should… talk to him.” She wheezed. I shook my head, “I don’t feel like talking to anyone.” 

“He’s worried, Nate. Just… promise me… you’ll talk to him?” I thought about it for a second before nodding my head. I was already hanging onto a promise her and I made all those years ago. 

——————

“Mom!” 

“Yes, Nate?” 

“Do you promise to stay with me for forever?” I hung onto the hem of her tattered dress. 

“Of course.” She smiled down at me.

——————

She had to keep that promise. She’s all I have left. Dad was already gone… I didn’t want to lose her too. 

“Honey, go get some breakfast. For me, please?” She had begged, and I just couldn’t say no. I walked over to the door, and told I would be back. 

———Ryker———

What happened three days ago was heartbreaking. At first I didn’t believe it. That’s a really big stretch, but it happened. How do I know? Because I’ve been calling and calling Nathan, and he doesn’t answer. It’s almost like he doesn’t wan tot talk, but then again I did the same with my own siblings after our parents passed away. I pushed them away and locked myself in my room. That’s what was happening with Nathan. 

I had heard his mom was in the hospital, still healing, and I really do hope that she would be okay. Her and Nathan. It’s going to break Nathan if she… y’know. 

Everyday I call him twice, he never answered. I understood why. I couldn’t be mad at him. The same thing happened to me. I pushed everyone away, and I only pulled myself together when I realized that they were also hurting. They helped me out like they did each other and now look at us. Back to some-what normal. Not to mention that they didn’t know how to cook or clean. 

I groaned, leaning back in my desk chair while looking at my phone. I felt terrible. All I wanted to do was to try and help him out as much as I could. I would give him anything he needed. I know how bad it gets, and I would hate to see him like that. 

My phone was going off, and I was surprised to see that Nathan was actually calling me back. I quickly picked up my phone and clicked the green phone button. 

“Oh my gosh Nathan! Are you okay? I-I heard what happened and-“ 

“This is Ryker, right?” It was a raspy woman’s voice. His mom.

“Oh, y-yes ma’am.” My hands were shaking, my heart racing. I don’t know why. 

“I-I’m sorry to ask… you of this but… can you do something… for me?” I covered my mouth, my heart throbbing. She sounded terrible. How could Nathan still be there and listen to his own mother like this? I couldn’t if I was him. Oh Nathan… 

“Anything!” 

I heard her lightly chuckle, “Just make sure… Nate doesn’t do anything bad… please? H-he’s really not… doing good.” 

“Of course.” I would imagine he wouldn't be doing too good. 

“Thank you.” 

“You’re welcome.” 

She hung up. 

I threw my phone on my bed, worried about what Nathan was even doing. I really am worried about him. So is nearly all of my siblings. Including Jasmine. I really wanted to talk to him. But I don’t think he’s going to school for the next couple of weeks. How do I know? Because I have the exact same message from the school. Also with a small note from Mrs. Kay saying that I should be there for him. Why wouldn’t I? I’m not a fake friend. I just hoped Nathan would call me eventually. 

———Nathan———

She wasn’t getting any better. Actually, I think she was getting worse. The doctor’s increased the amount of pain meds for her, and nearly everyday they have to do an emergency procedure because she couldn’t breath right. That’s when I received the news that she had a punctured lung, which explains why she couldn’t breath properly. But that wasn’t good news. There was none. Anything I had heard was something that was wrong with her. 

It was evening now, I was reading a book while she had the channel turned on to The Golden Girls. Everything was peaceful until she had a fit of coughs, and eventually the heart monitor was beeping fast. The doctors rushed in, and I could hear her struggle to breath again. 

“Mom!” I yelled, watching as they had rushed her down the hallway. 

“I love you, Nate.” She formed a weak smile right before they shut the door on me to the procedure room. 

——————

I came back home after a week of staying in the hospital on that uncomfortable bench. I had a bag over my shoulder, and stood in the empty living room. It was quiet. You could only hear the faint sounds of crickets outside in the dark. I headed to my room, turned on the lamp in my room, and laid down in my bed, holding the old teddy bear up against my chest. 

She was gone. 

Tears formed in my eyes, but I didn’t let them fall. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. And I didn’t. She wouldn’t want to see me like that. She would say that there was no reason to cry. But there was. I had no one now. Just myself. What would I do now? I sucked in a shaky breath, falling asleep and hoping that all of those was just some sick nightmare. 

When I woke up the next morning, it was quiet still. I stood up, changed my clothes and headed to the living room, where no one was sitting down watching tv. I headed to my mom’s room, finding her bed messy. She always makes sure it’s made before leaving the house. 

So it really wasn’t a nightmare. 

I wasn’t hungry. At least I didn’t feel hungry. I had only eaten that one day, and even then all I had was half a muffin. It’s been about four days since then. I felt that my body was weak, but I didn’t care. There was nothing for me to care about. I had just thought for once second that everything was alright. That everything was going great, and then this happens. It’s just my luck, right? 

My phone was going off. It hasn’t for a while. Ryker was calling again, and I still didn’t really feel like talking to anyone. Of course I realized that he was just trying to check up on me, but I really wasn’t up to the task. I wasn’t even up to the task of making myself something to eat, so what makes anyone think I could hold a conversation. 

It was cold in the house, so I just grabbed a blanket and bundled myself up on the couch. The tv was on in the background. It was usually on, and I was so used to it playing something while I was in my room reading or taking a nap. What was I supposed to do with my life now? There really was no meaning if I didn’t have anyone anymore. Ryker could move on. He didn’t need to worry about me. I was just a temporary friend anyways. 

Why am I thinking like this? 

I can’t believe I fell for a false ending. I thought I could just live a happy life now. Of course whatever bad luck was following me never went away. I could keep wishing all I want, but it wouldn’t bring any of my parents back. I could cry, but it wouldn’t bring them back. No matter how hard it was to keep the tears from falling. They would hate to see me like that. They would also hate to see me alone, but it was hard to choose between the two. 

I don’t want to leave Ryker. 

I groaned, burying my face into my hands. Maybe Ryker would give up on me too if I stayed quiet long enough. He’d eventually stop calling me everyday and find a new friend that was much, much better than me. Then again… I don’t want to lose him too. I really do like him. He’s been nothing but patient and kind to me. This was how I’d be repaying him? I was a horrible person. I would tell him that I’m sorry if I had the guts to. But I don’t. There’s nothing more I want in the world than to just cry and cry and cry, and I couldn’t. 

“I’m trying to keep myself together, mom.” I whispered, stifling back a sob and burying my entire body under the sheets. I felt terrible. I deserve everything that’s happened to me… I’m a horrible person and no one would disagree with me. 

——————

For the next four days I just slept. Off and on. There were some days I would sit outside in the cold and watch as people walked down the street or how many cars went passing by. I’d go back inside, lay down on the couch with my little bear and go to sleep. I didn’t feel like doing anything else, and somehow I woke up the next day feeling even more tired than before. I didn’t know if that was a sign that my body was giving up on me, or if was from the lack of food that I’ve been neglecting to give to my body. I just haven’t been feeling like it. 

Ryker never stopped calling, and each time he did my heart throbbed. Each time he called I had to hold in the tears that were already so hard not to let out. All of a sudden I wanted nothing more than for him to hold me close and keep me warm like he used to. I missed it. I missed him. Which was an odd thing for me to say. I grew too used to him, but was that really a bad thing? It just means it’ll hurt more when he eventually leaves me. He’ll take one good look at me now, and abandon me. Even the slightest mention of the thought was enough for me to not to answer his calls. I wanted to answer so badly. 

Please help me. 

I always repeated in my mind. I still had his gift. The picture of the two of us the first time we ever hung out together. I didn’t realize how small I really was next to him until I saw that photo, but I loved it. I had a real smile on my face. I haven’t been able to do that for a while. 

This morning wasn’t any different, I sat outside for a while until I couldn’t feel my fingers, walked back inside, grabbed a book, and read until I fell asleep. When I woke up, I’d put the tv on, clean up whatever little mess was in the house, and head back outside for a little. I at least like to get a little bit of sunlight everyday. I wasn’t really taking the best care of myself, but I could just do this one little thing. It couldn’t hurt me anymore than I already was. 

Maybe I could walk over to Ryker’s? 

That was an insane thought. There was no way I could do it. Plus, he probably doesn’t even want to see me. He’s called so many times I forgot what number I was at. Why would he want to see me? I really haven’t been the best. At all. Though… I could at least try. I know where he lives. I’ve been there plenty of times to know. I really did want to see him too. 

I grabbed my phone, zipped up my jacket, and started to walk slowly down the sidewalk. It was a long walk just to reach the small gas station that was close by their house. The sun was long gone, it was cold and snowing lightly outside, my face was freezing and my skin stung from the cold, but I kept on going. I was almost there. If he wanted to see me, he’d let me in and I could be warm again, have someone to talk to, finally be comfortable. If he doesn’t, then I’d be left out in the cold and get hypothermia unless I can make it back to my house in time. 

In total, it took me nearly an hour and a half to reach their house. I stared at the huge door in front of me, shivering. This was a bad idea. This could either go really good, or end really badly. I guess there was only one way to find out. 

I grabbed my phone with my shaking, ice-cold hands and called Ryker back. 

———Ryker———

Everyone was gone on some overnight school trip. The entire district. It was to some theme park a couple hours away from here, and I didn’t really feel like attending. Actually, I haven’t even been going to school since I received that message. I’ve been hanging onto hope that Nathan would eventually answer one of my calls. He never did. 

So now, here I was, watching a movie by myself in the living room. It was pretty late, but might as well finish off the movie. I was sitting down with a bowl of half-eaten popcorn when my phone started ringing. Probably just one of my siblings- 

It was Nathan. 

I freaked out, quickly pausing the movie and placing the bowl I had on the coffee table in front of me before answering. 

“Hello?” 

It took a while for Nathan to reply, but he did, and I was more than shocked. 

“U-um. C-c-could you o-o-open your d-d-door?” 

He just walked all the way from his house to mine. In the cold. While it was snowing. Of course I hurried to open the door, seeing the small being that was Nathan on my doorstep, shivering. I dropped my phone of the floor, scooping him up into my hand, hearing him let out a tiny squeak before I shut the door behind us. 

I gave him a second to catch his breath, his chest quickly rising up and down. I apologized so many times as I slid down the door. Nathan did not look good at all. He looked skinnier, I could tell he wasn’t really taking care of himself. I waited for him to say something, but he was struggling himself just to find the words. 

I wasn’t mad at him. Not at all. I’ve wanted to see him. I’ve wanted him to say for me to help him. Was this the time? I would do everything I could for him. Starting with making him something to eat since I’m positively sure he hasn’t been eating. I technically made a promise to his mom and I was not about to break it. 

“Did… did you want something to eat?” I whispered. It took him a second to process what I asked him, but he nodded, and I couldn’t tell if he was shivering of trembling in my hand. I stood up slowly, guiding us to the kitchen and tilting my hand on the counter for him to get off. I grabbed a plate of leftovers I made for myself last night and started heating it up in the microwave. I watched with sympathy as he scooted his back up against the paper towels and dug his head into his knees. He felt bad. 

“H-hey look, I promise I’m not mad at all. I understand why you didn’t answer my calls.” I tried to make him feel better. It’s not like I would lie to him. Nathan just shook his head, taking deep breaths to stop himself from crying. I bit the inside of my cheek, hearing the microwave go off. I took out the small container of chicken and rice and worked on making Nathan a small enough plate. I handed him the small pieces, offering a small smile as he took a bite. 

I waited until he was full, seeing that he didn’t really eat much, but it was better than nothing. Then, went over to the living room to turn off the tv. Obviously he wasn’t going home tonight. He was probably exhausted anyways, and I never did get rid of those makeshift accommodations for him. I don’t think he really wants to be alone either. 

“Do you wanna go lie down for a bit?” I asked, my hand palm up and ready for him to climb on. Nathan nodded his head, climbing on and sitting in the middle, a little warmer now. I closed the door to my room and turned on the lamp on my desk. I placed my hand on the nightstand for him to get off, but he didn’t Instead, he shook his head, grabbing as much of my sweater sleeve as he could and hung on tight. My heart fell. He just wanted someone to be there for him, and how could I deny him that? 

I smiled, sitting down up against the head of my bed and just let him stay in my palm. He was hurting, and I couldn’t just leave him like that. That’s when he let go and pointed back to the set up I had on my nightstand. 

“Hey, hey, it’s okay. I don’t mind. I get why you’re upset. I’ve been through the same thing.” His eyes went wide before shaking his head, “It’s not the same thing! I watched the doctors take her away. She said ‘I love you’ right before she went through the doors, and she never came out. She knew she wasn’t going back with me. I had no one waiting for me at home because my dad was also killed right in front of my face! I’ve been depressed and lonely for years, and I had no one. Did you have to watch your own parents die in front of your face? Were you alone after everything happened? No, because you had your siblings to help you!” He covered his mouth as I stared wide-eyed right back at him. He wasn’t wrong. I had people help me. Nathan didn’t. Which was why I wanted to help him. But the next words that came out of his mouth shook me to the core. 

“Please don’t hurt me. I-I’m s-sorry.” 

He brought his knees up to his chest and covered his head with his arms. My heart skipped a beat. He was afraid of me, and that just made me horrified. He never told me what happened to him before he moved here. He never told me why he was so afraid of giants. So, whatever had happened was obviously was affecting how he felt right now. 

“What? No, never little guy. Why would I hurt you?” 

“You’re not mad?” 

I shook my head, “Not at all.” 

I watched as he wiped away loose tears, sniffling them back and scooting closer to me. I braced myself for what I knew what was coming next. 

———Nathan———

Once the tears had started flooding my eyes, there was nothing I could do to stop from crying in front of Ryker now. I bit the side of my cheek so hard the faint taste of blood filled my mouth. Don’t cry. Don’t cry, don’t cry. But my own words didn’t stop the tears from cascading down my face. 

Ryker fixed my position in his palm while I struggled to wipe away the loose tears that were only falling down harder the more I kept thinking about the tragic events that have happened this past month. Why? Why’d she have to leave me here? 

I was full on sobbing at this point. I had buried my face in Ryker’s hoodie to muffle the sounds of my cries. I could hear the faint sound of his heartbeat, I could hear his light breathing. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Ryker. Is what I wish I could say to him, but I currently couldn’t 

Something warm pressed me up lightly against Ryker’s chest. I flinched, slightly turning my head to see that the pad of his thumb was offering some kind of comfort. It felt weird to me, but somehow I liked it? I didn’t want him to let go of me, but I was also scared at the same time. 

“It’s okay, it’s okay. I’m right here, Nathan.” Ryker whispered softly, noticeably trying to comfort me while I just cried and cried into the fabric of his hoodie. I’m sorry Ryker. I wanted to say it so badly, but I couldn’t. Why did he worry about me so much? I should be at home, alone, crying into my pillow. Why did he want to stay with an insignificant little human whose life somehow gets turned upside down every other month? 

“I’m s-s-sorry.” I managed to say in between sobs. He lightly squeezed me against him before responding, “You’re the one who’s hurt, Nathan. You don’t have to apologize if I’m the one who wants to help you, okay?” 

And I could practically hear the sad smile forming on his face as he continued to offer a comforting presence. 

I quietly kept on crying, grabbing fistfuls of as much fabric as I could while feeling safe up against his chest. Was this what I needed? To be held just like this and cry and cry? It felt so good. I didn’t want Ryker to ever let go of me. The soft, warm touch on my back felt amazing. 

“I-I miss her, Ryker.” I cried in between sobs. 

“I know, I know. It’s alright,” He started lightly rubbing my back, making me slightly shudder, “Do you want me to let you go?” I quickly shook my head, sniffling while tears silently fell down my face. Please don’t ever let me go. I snuggled up closer, closing my eyes. This felt right. Nothing else could make me feel better. 

“You okay?” He asked me. I nodded my head, hearing him chuckle above me. I missed both my parents. So, so much. Nothing could describe just how grateful I was that Ryker didn’t shut me out. I’ve never felt better than right now at this very moment. I don’t know what I would have done. Probably continue to starve myself until I eventually died. That was probably my initial plan, but I doubt that now that I’m with Ryker he’d just let me do that. Heck, the first thing he asks me is if I want something to eat, which I involuntarily nodded to. I felt safe when I was around him. 

Ryker moved, but never moved me. He just laid down and just let me lay down on him. I smiled to myself, closing my eyes and just letting sleep take over me. 

And it felt like the first real sleep I’ve had in ages. 

——————

Please don’t hate me, I was just in an extremely angsty mood TwT. But hey, at least we get some comfort, right? Hahaa… (Please don’t hurt me)

I’m sorry this one took so long, it’s just I wanted to add a whole bunch of wholesome scenes. It was fun and depressing to write this, but everything’s all coming together. (Please don’t mind the many errors I was too tired edit it) Only a few more chapters and it’s done! Thank you guys for sticking with me on this ride, thank you all!

#g/t #g/t writing #g/t community #g/t comfort #g/t angst #giant/tiny #my writing #Restoration #oc: ryker #oc: nathan #I feel so bad for nathan #Even if I’m the one who did this TwT #I’m sorry #Oh my gosh this was a rollercoaster #Even I was crying at a point #My poor boys 🥺 #It’ll get better I promise! #Please don’t hate me #thank you for reading #love you guys ❤️

[jounosparticles]

do you think you'll survive if we see tecchou and jouno reunite

i guarantee i will be 10000x more annoying on here for at least a month when they do. catch me with numerous theories and a super long analysis of every single panel. catch me posting the same panels over and over with different variations of me being super excited over it. i will explode out of pure joy!!!!

if we don’t get a reuniting scene my wrath will be known. there’s no way we Don’t get one. several chapters took place where tetchou fought to find jouno which asserted it as an important event you know? it would feel like a loose end if they didn’t give them proper closure on finding and just moved on.

im also hoping bones didn’t skip over it or something and that we see it adapted next season. i’d actually be heartbroken if we don’t get their uniting animated as well </3

ANYWAYS TLDR i will actually grow wings and fly around happily if they reunite on screen and will sob if they don’t

#i really really hope it has some emotion in it though #ill be really sad if it’s just a whole «oh hey jouno glad to find you let’s go» thing #i want emotion i want tetchou to be heartbroken to hear what jouno went through #I WANT THEM TO HUG SO BADLY. collapsing in each others arms out of exhaustion and relief #<- i know that won’t happen probably but a silly goose can dream #genuinely if they ever were to hug please know id probably explode with happiness and hang it on my wall or something #BJT PLEASEEEE ASAGIRI MAKE SUPER LONG CHAPTERS AHAIN SO WE CAN CATCH UP!!!! #asks

[def-not-kaz-brekker]

So uh I might have a crush on my best friend?? And I think he might like me back???

(Read tags for more details)

#go I hope he still doesn’t have tumblr #no but he’s so hot okay #and our lives are so similar?? #like I moved more than him but he’s still the only person who’s moved a lot #and that time I got tipsy #it was on a sleepover with him where we trauma dumped and watched sherlock together #and once I had an emotional breakdown and he helped me calm down #and we do dnd together #and we have to pick new classes for next year and he practically guessed all my choices #also I told him I thought his eyes were really pretty some time ago #which is true he has gorgeous eyes #and recently he told me I have pretty eyes #help?? #je suis confusion #he said that he hasn’t liked anyone in forever during our trauma dump session #but then again he might still like me #but I don’t even know if I like him #though probably I do let’s be honest here #ugh fuck this #emotions are fucking stupid #if I fuck things up in our friendship I will regret it forever

[girls-and-honey]

.

#okay so random tag post even though it's been ages #me thinks the current place i work is actually decent a la accepting-queer-ppl so?? miiiiight. consider actually putting my #pronouns in my email signature (which hardly gets used but shh) but like. the actual ones not the society/people assume anyway ones #idk i attended a virtual tech focused event for trans dov (yes early but they didn't want to put the event on sun) and you know when #everyone is just sharing their stories and experiences and it's just like... an overwhelming sense of community? anyway that #and since it was hosted by a professional org the topics were all workplace focused and mayhaps that's something i'm thinking abt for #this year. at least within our pride group I might be ready? wild bc for a long time tumblr has been the only place I feel comfy being 100% #myself. but hearing real people's stories makes me feel like that kind of community would be nice to have elsewhere too #and the whole looking to others also turns around into the leading by example thing bc then we had some breakout groups at the end for #networking which is not my favorite but! i did my intro and said I use she/her for work but will use she/they for this group and #then the next person said he/him at work but for this group he/they so that made me wonder if it was bc of me saying so first? #which if it was is kind of like oh. the way I'm looking for those people for me.. I can also be that for someone else #anyway this sounds dumb typed out but irl/professional me has always separated out queer identity so it's new to me #i'm allowed to be giddy okay. just a little. as a treat (is tumblr still using 'as a treat' i really hope so) #oh shit is this what gender euphoria feels like #alright that's it for now i think #gah emotions and whatnot #missed you all btw i'll start actually being online again soon #personal

[musubiki]

how was playing hsr? was there anything that you liked in the game and the story?

ITS BEEN AMAZING AS EXPECTED!!!!!!!!! i actually havent played genshin in a while since starting it, i have no motivation to do the filler event while a perfectly good star rail is sitting there waiting to be played :')

but for mechanics, i love they have auto battle so you dont have to nessecarily sit there and invest in every little battle you gotta do....and i love that the resin (resin??) system is a lot more forgiving with a higher cap, lower cost, and allow for overflow...thats nice...i also love that the mc and starter units are very useful. im so emotionally attatched to the star rail crew so im glad they never have to leave my team !!!!

storywise im LOVING IT SO FAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i started playing it at the beginning of spring break 2 weeks ago and im almost all caught up!!! i went through belabog and penacony and now im just doing those leftover intermission main quests which im only now realizing i shouldve done before going to penacony LMAO

and of course.....danmarch....im so soft for them......and also i love sampo i cant wait to see what they do with him

#besides the star rail crew and sampo im not too attatched to anyone else #im very much a (what would happen in canon) type of player so the only units i REALLY want are himeko welt and imbibitor lunae #(and sampo) #everyone else i can go without #so this game is probably gonna be a lot better for my wallet #overall it just like it better than genshin minus the open world part #i like the story and characters...i like that you can play as bad guys while theyre still bad guys???? like blade and kafka??? #cuz in genshin you always gotta redeem them somehow first before theyre playable #not here hueheuhe #also i love that they actually kill off playable characters #(spoilers from here on out) #i know were supposed to be all sad for fireflys death but honestly.......i didnt care about her too much LMAO #i was actually a little annoyed for the secret base part because her base was SO FUCKING DEEP IN ENEMY TERRITORY #i was like (damn bitch how far away is this shit??!) #that by the time we got to the emotional part i was just mad #i never liked characters where the game tries to like....force you to care about them #and its implied you have some super close relationship ESPECIALLY when you havent known them long #now if march died that would be a whole different story #but firefly??? i mean rip but i didnt really know her #im loving the penacony quest so far though #any setting where its like a place of mind tricks and gambling and spending money and sin is always so scary to me #especially the dream within a dream within a dream shit #the mind fuck aspect is always a good plot that i enjoy #i also love that theyre not afraid to upgrade units #like we have dan heng and the dragon dan heng #so characters arnt stagnent forever #everyday i hope we one day get to see a 5-star secret power march #cuz that girl has some shit going on i swear #i just did her luofu memory quest #and those fuckers in the garden of recollection............

[muselexum]

<3

#sending you all so much love #it's crazy how a year has zipped by #every so often i'll come by and check up on the dash and i love seeing all the familiar names <33 #I'll prolly write a more official post in the new year at some point #but im so eager for this work contract to end at the end of this year #im grateful for the job in many ways but in others it was really burnt me out and drained me #ready to turn a new leaf in the new year #and hopefully get some of my creative motivation back when my mind clears #ive put even art/painting on the sidelines as well this year which is something im sad about #but on the positives I think ive had a lot of personal and emotional growth this year that im really proud of!! #(still dont have a driver's license though.. LOL OOP) #and ive really worked on my anxiety and depression. like even if this job is burning out and depressing me// I don't feel DEPRESSED ya kno. #ive just been experiencing a lot of personal growth and change #and the people around me in my life have told me that they've seen changes in me this year too so :') #BUTTTTTT #I so so miss my creative outlets and I feel like I've neglected that this year #I went from escapism to fully avoiding the outlets so now I think it's time to transition into the healthy middle #anywaaaay #hope yall have been doing amazing #love u all and ill probably pop in here for the holidays <33 #blows u all kisses #ooc #tbd

[theflyingfeeling]

...🤧

#god i hate being on my period and being so flipping emotional and just wanting to cry for random reasons #my current reasons: cute doggo pictures and also the fact i'm up and awake instesd of in bed asleep?? 😩 #last night i cried about fictional people #both about their problems as well as the fact they're leading more exciting lives than i do 😂 #which makes no sense i knoooooowww but i was feeling crap and lonely okay #can't wait to be home tonight to cry some more. as a treat 👌 #crying is healthy! i just wish i knew why i felt so shitty last night 🤔 #i guess i was just exceptionally tired. i work only 4 days a week but somehow this week has felt never-ending 😭 #i've had an alright week in general though? nothing to complain really so maybe it really just is period stuff 🙄 #i hope anyone reading this has been having it a bit easier this week 🤍