#idiot rat son

[immult]

i will not let anyone forget Laura called Imogen an idiot (affectionate).

#yeah that's the love of my life. she's an idiot. ZERO intelligence modifier. as smart as her rat son. i love her so much. :) #imogen temult #critical role #cr3 #laura bailey #it's mogen hours #media tag

[scatterbrainedbot]

I AM SPINNING I AM PACING I AM FULL ON FROLICKING IM SO EXCITED

@d1sc0rd1a THANK U FOR THESE TAGS

okayokayokayokay so pretty much all of these questions will be Officially Answered properly in the character design/intro pages im working on but also i am physically vibrating with excitement about the fact that you noticed all these details and i have very little self control so! lore dump time!!!

(minor tw for mentions of leos self-harm/self-destructive anxious behaviors and unhealthy coping skills)

- mikey does indeed have curly fur! i believe he would be considered a 'rex' rat (pictured on the left) for this trait? though the curls can be more easily seen on mice (pictured on the right). or, at least it seems that way. have not delved too deeply into the details of rodent genes and husbandry, but id assume its the same sort of mutation considering curly haired mice are also referred to as rex sometimes? either way hes a extra floofy bby 🧡

-as for raphie, unfortunately being more fluff and less shell than the average rapheal comes with its downsides. especially if you and your brothers occasionally encounter things like territorial dogs, hungry cats, or sewer crocodiles while exploring places ur dad said not supposed to go. (most of his scars will have more ninja related stories, but his ear i think got messed up from something very animal. probably around age 11 ish? old enough to sneak out from dads protection but young enough to not fully know how to handle himself alone against real danger. thankfully his ear injury looks worse than it actually is for the most part, as the damage was largely to the outer ear. his hearing wasnt super affected, except that he now has a bit of a harder time being able to track/pinpoint noises origins if its on his right side.)

-also yep! dons got some glasses that just clip/rest on the bridge of his nose! theyre mostly just for home use, as they do fall off if hes knocked around. in the field he has some goggles he tends to use (theyre helpful as they have multiple additional functions like heat-imaging, extra zoom/telescoping, and recording capabilities. but also theyll give him headaches if he wears them for too long without breaks). contacts are theoretically also an option but he absolutely hates the sensation of putting them in. so sometimes when hes tired he'll just not bother with either clips or goggles and just squint and struggle. leo hates when he does that lol.

-speaking of leo, he is def an anxious baby :) he has a few patches of fur missing on his hand cos he has the tendency to tug on it while hes thinking. he yanked and chewed on his own tail a lot when he was younger too, which is why when hes older he usually wears some wraps to cover the scars left from that behavior. he finds those scars specifically to be kinda embarrassing and shameful because they werent from any battle or life-lesson, just his own 'inability to control himself'. all of his brothers have repeatedly called him out on the fact that that is not a healthy way to think about his anxiety or mental health, but leo insists hes fine. hes kinda convinced himself that a proper warrior always has control over his own body* and his own thoughts, thus he should be able to just like willpower-brute-force his way into 'being better'. (this line of thinking pisses raph off so much he has to leave and go hit something)

Splinter also tries to talk him through some of that internalized guilt/shame/everything, but splinters very metaphorical, poetic, and indirect when it comes to talking about Big Things, which combined with how much leo gets caught in his own head, makes it kinda hard to gauge how much these talks actually help

*this is made extra fun considering leos also ftm trans, so he is faced with a body that fundamentally disobeys him perhaps more than the average rat-man.

-and im still going back and forth between a few species for splinter, but im leaning mostly towards an African Spurred Tortoise! they have these beautiful if kinda subtle geometric shell patterns and are the third largest species of tortoise in the world. the only thing that doesnt fit perfectly with Splints is that (allegedly) their lifespan in captivity is around 50ish years, whereas im p sure Tortoise Splinter is well over 75, probably closer to 90 when the boys are born and hes mutated into Old Man Papa.

but maybe hes just a particularly long lasting African Spurred Tortoise.

the Hamato family has taken very good care of him for many decades after all. :)

(well. until everything all fell apart, that is.....)

#tmnt #rat sons #my art #tmnt au #literally bouncing around the room thinking about this all #my downstairs neighbors are gonna hate me #ask reply #sort of??? #pats leos fucked up lil head #this bad boy can fit so much projection #get out of ur head idiot ur family loves and wants to help u #also looking at the chaco tortoise and ploughshare tortoise for splinter thoboth of those are smaller species than i think he is

[purpleturtle9000]

somone convince me not to write a leosagi rockstar/bodyguard au

#i have had this thought for exactly 4 minutes but it is In My Brain #rockstar leo whose dad found him a traditional japanese bodyguard bc his beloved idiot son keeps getting into trouble #what my dear rat jitsu did not anticipate was that yuichi also keeps getting into trouble bc he has minimal impulse control #for some reason he also did not anticipate that putting a hot guy with a sword and strong moral compass in leo's vicinity #was going to result in leo Immediately getting a crush on said guy

[miss-dollette]

Makarov • Baby Daddy Headcanons

While Makarov is a psychopathic maniac without a care for anyone, he'd definitely never abandon his own. This man values loyalty above anything and will never forsake one of his own, especially his baby mama and his child.

A visit from Makarov would be rare, but when he visited, he always made sure to bring a gift for his baby, and sometimes, even for you. Nothing cheap, of course—a necklace worth thousands. See it as a reward for being an oh-so-good woman and bearing him a child.

Don't bother with work. Call in and never come back. Makarov has you covered for the rest of your life. He'd move you away from the dingy city and have you cozy with your baby in a house you'd never be able to pay off on your own. But you wouldn't need to worry about that - Makarov made sure to pay in cash to whatever sketchy realtor he knew would never reveal your location. If they did... let's just say they'd never sell another house again.

The new addition to the Makarov family would love their father. They'd cry all day in your arms, never stopping until their father's rough cheek scratched against their own, and he shushed them in his rough Russian manner.

The first time you handed over the tiny Makarov to their father would become a bittersweet memory.

"Make sure his/her neck is supported," you softly said while passing the baby into Makarov's arms, mindful of the delicate strength his/her little neck had yet to develop.

"Perfect," you said as Makarov gently held the baby in his arms, his neck crooked down as he watched his baby's eyelids flutter, their little pink cheeks, and tufts of hair on top their head. The baby tiny fist lifted into air, and Makarov placed his lips upon their tiny knuckles.

You leaned in and placed your lips on Vladimirs rough cheek.

He'd definitely pretend he wasn't obsessed with his newborn baby's scent. You'd walk into the nursery, and he'd shoot up from the crib and act like his nose wasn't all up in his baby's scalp.

He'd be fiercely protective of his family. No one, not even his closest allies, would know. Maybe Yuri, but he'd only tell him long after you gave birth.

If he had a son, he'd definitely plan to raise him in a macho-man way. Your son's fifth birthday gift would be a Russian prison knife from the Gulag. And no, he wouldn't care if you made a fuss about it being dangerous for a child.

"Now, why the hell would you give him that? What were you thinking?"

"He's nearly a grown man, and every grown man needs a knife."

"He's five!"

"I was gifted a rifle when I was five, so be grateful!"

Now, if he had a daughter, that would be a whole 'nother story. She would definitely be his little tsarina. All she would need to do is ask, and she'd have it in her little palm.

"She'll become a spoiled little brat if you keep spoiling her like that,"

"What, like you?"

"Not funny."

"Seems funny to me. Come, My Little Tsarina, let's go pick out one of your future cars."

He grew up poor and constantly surrounded by critters sneaking around in his home. He'd bring home stray cats to make sure no rats or mice would go near his baby.

Will sometimes sleep over. You'd both sleep in the same bed, and his razor-sharp training from when he was a soldier would come to good use. Any noise your baby made would wake him instantly.

He's paranoid as hell, so be ready for him to patrol the house multiple times a day. Your baby will grow up thinking it's normal for his father to have an automatic assault rifle in hand, walking around with murder in his eyes, ready to blow apart whoever dared target his family.

The baby would giggle every time their father passed by, and you'd watch boredly as he walked past. It got boring after the first ten times.

If there ever was a break in, God bless the idiot who did so. Not even his bones would be found.

Other than that, he's a cutie patootie when it comes to his baby. But like, a scary cutie patootie.

#cod mw2 #mw2 x reader #cod makarov #makarov x reader #vladimir makarov x reader #cod mw3 #mw2 #vladimir makarov #makarov #cod mwii #call of duty #mw3 headcanons #headcanon #fluff

[sexiestpodcastcharacter]

Sexiest Podcast Character — Unscripted Bracket — Round 5

Propaganda

Glenn Close (Dungeons & Daddies):

#Propaganda for Glenn Close: one of the other PCs mentions multiple times how hot he is #Actually several characters point it out but especially Henry #Also the only person in a podcast that has to put a disclaimer about not being a BDSM podcast to have had sex during the course of the show

Young hot rocker dilf

Loyal to his dead wife <3

Does in fact smoke weed

BARD!! HES A BARD. HE WAS LEAD GUITAR IN HIS BAND (that he was kicked out of)

His band was a Christmas cover band btw.

Literally the fandom had hot Glenn summer which consisted of drawing him being incredibly hot and sexy

Anti government (ofc)

Kind of cringefail (Disney adult) (was on dilfs of disneyland)

Young and sexy not your style? Then how about HIM AFTER YEARS LOCKED IN A TIME PRISON WITH A DAMN HANNIBAL MASK ??

Lost an eye and wears a fucking eyepatch

One incredibly buff arm

Has a pet rat named after his son <3

Immeasurable amounts of trauma in this man- becomes progressively more unhinged

OH OLD HUMAN BARD ISNT CUTTING IT? FINE

HE BECOMES A FUCKING DEMON

A COOL HOT ONE-EYED DEMON WHO WANTS TO KILL HIS DAD (also sexy)

HE CANONICALLY ENDS CHRISTIAN HELL VIA CHRISTMAS

IS ALSO WAY OVERLEVELED

Becomes a demon hunter for the rest of his existence

Also nonwhite !!! We are done with cringefail whiteboys !!!!!!!!!

I can’t put into words ok just know he is the best plz love him.

Okay but Glenn made a minivan cum by talking to her so

HE HAS A BOOK THAT HE MARKS X’S AND CHECKS FOR EVERY DAY TO SEE IF THAT DAY WAS A SUCCESS OR NOT. TO SEE IF HE DID GOOD THAT DAY. ITS ALMOST ENTIRELY X’S. HE WAS CUCKED OUT OF A SON. AND A DEAD WIFE. HE DIDN’T EVEN GET TO KILL HIS DAD IN REVENGE. There’s absolutely nothing going for him except his sex appeal in his life. Nobody he loved remembers him. He lost his eye. All he has is a pet rat and friends who admit they don’t really like him that much. He was kicked out of his own band. The band was named after him. He was kicked out of the Glenn Close trio. All he could do was deez nuts the big bad and be sexy. If nothing else, then pity him. Look in his eyes. Look at his heart and soul. He did not do the BDSM episode for this I’ll tell you what. Do this for my his sake. Do it for Nick Jr, who needs the prize money to pay for his rat snacks. Do it for his son. For Morgan. Ganbatte.

Glenn is the goofiest sexiest character there is and I will die on this hill! I will ride into battle for him! what Dndads created is truly unique and Glenn is a key part of that and for that he deserves to win. I said it before and I'll say it again - GLENN SWEEEEEP

Can we talk about how he says ‘baby’ casually? Like he just calls people that?? That’s HOT. THAT IS HOT!! He’s also bilingual and knows Japanese!!!! He’s a big dumb idiot with a lot of charisma!!!!!! HE WORKED AT A BDSM PLACE FOR TWO SEPARATE ONE SHOTS. HES SO SAD BUT PLAYS IT OFF LIKE HE’S CHILL ALL THE TIME!! HE DOESN’T THINK OF HIMSELF AS SINGLE BECAUSE HE DIDN’T DIVORCE HIS DEAD WIFE!!! He’s like.. the perfect guy. We need this win.

I’d also like to add the fact I made this. Which is the first 11 episodes edited to (almost) only have Glenn in them <3 which is a level of insanity I hope to reiterate. These took hours to make. I wouldn’t do that for anyone else.

Mod Note: While I will still take "bad dads are sexy" propaganda and "bad dads aren't sexy" anti-propaganda, I kindly request no more discussion on whether or not he was a bad father. This is a sexypoll, not a parentingpoll. If you see a post you strongly disagree with, you can just not reblog it.

Mod Note 2: This tournament is about fictional podcast characters. Please do not vote for the real actress Glenn Close.

Amber Gris (The Adventure Zone: Ethersea):

Middle aged woman who punches sharks to death. My hero

If you love me you'll vote for amber gris I swear to everything holy on earth amen

Amber is butch, instant win

Amber Gris has a negative charisma modifier and she pissed her pants on purpose in order to trick a guard and knock him out. She tied up a dude. She once killed an evil magic shark (they're out for murder. not like real sharks) by punching it and then picked it up and smashed it into another shark, also killing it. She talks in a southern accent. She calls people guppy because it indicates a lack of respect. She has a big pair of magical green arms that come from her stomach. She got a fancy jacket and immediately ripped its sleeves off. She has a gay thing going on with one of the political leaders in the city. She gets in fights with people and doesnt do vulnerability and tries to lay low and not get in any social trouble she doesn't have to. She jumped through a portal into a new world because she could. She's now the god of said world, alone with only afformentioned political leader, who was previously possessed and she had to fight. She spends her time in a bar called the Cloaca. She calls people she doesn't like claspers, because it means shark penis. She and her friend, an old man named Uncle Joshy, sneak attack each other and yell VIBE CHECK! She tries to talk fancy to impress people and she's really bad at it (verily).

She’s everything and more. She’s irreverent. She punches sharks for a living. She becomes God. What more do you need in a butch.

amber gris propaganda: she is straightup the physical embodiment of "women want me, fish fear me." also she's an appalachian post apocalyptic sea captain. that's just objectively cool.

AMBER GRIS IS PUNCHES SHARKS AND IS (one of) THE MOST BADASS BLACK WOMEN PCS IN DND SHOWS IVE EVER SEEN. SHES INCREDIBLE AND A WIN FOR DYKES EVERYWHERE

amber's creator said she was based off of the type of working-class woman you commonly see in appalachia where "this is the sort of woman that you see walking past CVS, and you know that a truck could hit her and it would just split around her as she continued to go pick up whatever she had to do that day." and that's pretty hot

guys Amber becomes lesbian god of the new world with her childhood “”friend””

#amber gris is LITERALLY a middle-aged butch #she would win this entire tournament in a just world

Last time Amber got horny was when she killed that shark

"it was a savage bummer though, don't-- trust me, there's nothing that great about a history. You know? I got one. What did I do, killed a bunch of sharks? Last time I got horny, god and christ I can't even tell you-- well, it was when I killed that shark. But! Hey. We're all just kinda figuring it out."

Moonshine Cybin (Not Another D&D Podcast: Bahumia):

She's a hot elf with mushrooms growing on her. She has 1 level of barbarian. She's bisexual. She shapeshifted into a dragon and ate a god.

how tf does the post not mention Moonshine’s giant boobs her greatest asset

Moonshine has canonically gone down on a woman for a solid hour without asking for anything in return. Moonshine edged a dryad just by kissing them. Moonshine faced down someone being controlled to kill everyone in his path and told him if he still wanted to hurt her, she would take his blows as a friend. Moonshine makes jambalaya for her family and friends. Moonshine mispronounced someone’s name for a month and that woman still wanted to hook up with Moonshine. These are just a few of the reasons why Moonshine is sexy.

shes illiterate

canonically huffs dirty water from a bong

has big tatas

wears a belly chain with a demon trapped in it

almost became the queen of hell

ate a god

turned into a pregnant moose & gave birth

The woman she went down on for an hour asking nothing in return is still hung up on her, 200 years later. Moonshine is unmatched

To be clear the woman whose name Moonshine mispronounced for a month and then hooked up with is the same woman she went down on for an hour, and the same woman who is still flustered over her 200 years later. The rizz is unparalleled. She’s also incredibly kind and accepting of others, and goes out of her way to bolster her friends. The party always requests one big bed.

moonshine cybin is a druid who learned counterspell through sheer force of will. moonshine cybin turned one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse into a dolphin, flew him 60 feet up into the air, dropped him on the ground, and then spit spores into his face to kill him. moonshine cybin turned into a dragon and bit the head off of a double god. moonshine cybin was willing to confine herself to an eternal hell to save the world. moonshine cybin is a dragon rider. you know what you must do.

Amber and Moonshine Together

Look at them. They should not have to fight when they could be gay instead. Imagine the power they would have combined... Every lesbian in a hundred mile radius of the post would swoon. It may be an odd alliance, but from an Ethersea fan to Bahumia fans, i believe this will strengthen both our odds. I have always been insane about Amber Gris but through this poll I have also learned about Moonshine and come to love her too. Take my hand... We can do this together...

OKAY HEAR ME OUT MOONSHINE AND AMBER WOULD GET ALONG SO WELL

appalachian sapphic solidarity!

Art of Amber and Moonshine from @pirateknight.

#Round 5 #Glenn Close #Glenn Close DnDads #Moonshine Cybin #Amber Gris #Not Another D&D Podcast #Bahumia #The Adventure Zone #TAZ Ethersea #Dungeons & Daddies #Dungeons and Daddies

[janeyseymour]

Won't You Be... My Neighbor?- pt 1

@schemmentis threw out the idea of a reversal of LTN, so... here it is. I hope it delivers.

WC: ~3.3k

When Melissa Schemmenti had said “for better or for worse, til death do us part,” she had wholeheartedly meant it and believed it. She had seen the way that her parents had fallen out of love and divorced, and she swore that she would learn from their mistakes and find a real and true love- that she would fight for her love and her life, and that she would never end up the bitter divorcée like her mother, cursing the father of her child in front of said child. 

But here she was doing everything she promised herself she wouldn’t and packing her bags along with her son’s after she caught Joe in bed with his babysitter. And then he had the audacity to tell her that they needed to divorce- that he was in love with Alyssa and couldn’t keep this charade going.

“Fuckin’ asshole,” Melissa grumbles as she hold her son on her hip. “Sleeping with the nanny… fuckin’ babysitter fucker.”

“Momma.”

“I’m sorry Joey,” the redhead mumbles as she presses a kiss to the little boy’s head. She curses the day she let her idiot of a husband convince her to name their son after him. “I’m sorry… Momma’s just… mad.”

“Really mad?” the newly four year old asks.

Melissa just nods once before continuing to pack their bags.

“Momma?”

“Yeah, baby?”

“Where are we going?”

“We’re getting out of here,” the teacher sighs. “Daddy decided that we aren’t good enough for him anymore, and you know what? We’re better than him… so we’re leaving, and we’re goin’ to be real happy.”

The last thing that she packs before they leave for the night is the divorce papers. She shows up at Kristen Marie’s doorstep praying that her sister will be kind enough to let the two Schemmenti’s stay on her couch.

“Melissa? Joey?”

“Please don’t say his name,” Melissa groans as she rubs at her temple with the hand not holding her four year old. “I- I can’t right now without wanting to take my bat to that rat bastard’s car.”

“Rat bastard?” Joey echoes through a yawn. He reaches over for his aunt.

“Don’t repeat what Momma just said,” the blonde Schemmenti sister sighs as she takes the little boy into her arms. “What happened, Mel?”

“Asshole slept with the nanny, and then even after I forgave him for the sake of our son handed me divorce papers at dinner,” the redhead huffs. “Can we crash here on the couch for the night? If I have to look at him one more time tonight…”

“Stay as long as you need,” Kristen tells her sister as she roams further into her townhouse. “And you damn well know I ain’t letting you sleep on the couch when I have a perfectly good guest room.”

“You’re a lifesaver,” Melissa sighs softly. “Thank you.”

That was three months ago. In those three months, Joe had promised to give Melissa absolute hell when it came to the divorce and settling everything, claiming that Joe Jr. needed to be with his father. The redhead was adamant that their son, who she now called strictly “JJ”, would be staying with her. This divorce was getting intense and messy, and everything that the second grade teacher had hoped it wouldn’t be- but when there’s a small child involved, of course it would get messy.

In those three months though, the Schemmenti sisters had used their powers of knowing many different guys who were able to help throw together a decently sized apartment for cheap, and she was able to get a steal in terms of rent.

The two had just finished setting up JJ’s bedroom when Kristen Marie finally called it a day. And that leaves Melissa and her son. Her son who is absolutely starving and exhausted and not yet used to this new place that he was supposed to call home.

“Love,” the redhead sighs as she tries to soothe his wailing. The second grade teacher is positive that this place had thin walls, and her neighbors are going to hate her if he continued to cry like this.

“I want to go home!” JJ cries into his mother’s shoulder.

Melissa lets out a shaky breath. “This is home now.”

“No!” his little balled up fist collides with his mother’s shoulder blade. It takes everything in the redhead to not groan out in pain.

“JJ,” Melissa warns. “We do not hit Momma.”

“I don’t care!” he shouts as he does it again.

“Joseph Alexander,” the mother says sternly. She hates that her son shares a first name with his father, even more so now that they’re in the midst of a dirvorce.

The redhead closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. “Maybe we need to go on a walk. What do you think? I think that sounds like a great idea,” she thinks aloud. The woman knows that walking around with him while humming softly is almost a sure fire way to get him to fall asleep and stay asleep for at least thirty minutes while she makes dinner, and it has been the perfect way to lull him to sleep since he was born.

She steps out into the hallway and begins to bounce him gently as she walks up and down the hallway, mindlessly singing her favorite tunes softly. When she starts to sing “You Are My Sunshine” though, something else takes over in her body, and she can’t help the tears that form in her eyes. They fall down her cheeks so delicately, and with her son in her arms, she is unable wipe them away. There’s something different about the song now that her marriage had turned into a failed one, and Joe is truly trying to take her little boy, her sunshine, away.

And that’s when you just so happen to be making your way out of your own apartment from down the hall. You immediately hear the soft and sad tune that you’ve had memorized since you were little, and your gaze follows the voice. Your eyes land on a stunning redhead that you’ve never seen before who is holding a now sleeping little boy- and then you see that her eyes are sparkling with tears. Deciding not to overstep and say anything when it looks like this woman is clearly in distress, you simply wave at her gently with an encouraging smile before heading for the elevator.

Once Melissa is sure that JJ is out for at least a little bit, she heads back into the apartment and sets him on the couch. The mother drapes a blanket over her dozing son before pressing a soft kiss to his chubby little cheek and making her way into the kitchen.

It’s much later when you return back from the gym and freshen up in the shower. As you go to sit on the couch with a glass of wine to unwind for the night, you frown. Maybe you should check on that neighbor of yours. You’re familiar with everyone else who lives on your floor, so you know which door to knock on in order to find that beautiful emerald-eyed woman from earlier in the evening with a second glass of wine in hand to offer to the woman that you don’t know the name of.

Inside the apartment, Melissa is sitting on her new couch with a bowl of popcorn and a rather heavy pour of red wine as she watches her reality television show that she hasn’t had time to watch in the midst of the move. 

Your knock startles her. It’s loud enough to get her attention, and she grabs the bat that sits next to her for protection. She approaches the door with her bat in hand.

“Who is it?” the redhead yells just loud enough for you to hear, but not loud enough to wake the little boy in the other room.

“You the woman that just moved in?” you call back.

“What’s it to you?!” she asks, and her grip on the bat just gets tighter, although she knows it’s probably nothing worth worrying about. Your voice was light and sweet, even at the volume you were using.

“Saw you had a kid. Was wondering if you needed help with anything. You looked real stressed.”

At that, she opens the door just a crack, and she recognizes you as the woman she saw a few hours earlier. Her bat lowers, and she opens it a bit more.

“The help would’ve been nice while I was moving in,” she retorts.

“Trust me, if I were around this last week, I would’ve offered to help,” you sigh softly. “Away for work… but it’s nice to meet you now.” You offer her the glass of rosé wine that you had brought from down the hall.

“I’m already ahead of you there,” she sighs with a bitter chuckle. “Thank you though.”

“Yeah,” you laugh softly as you tuck a hair behind your ear. Now that you can see her up close and personal, you see that she really is stunning- beautiful red hair, sparkling jade colored eyes, straight teeth, and you would be lying if you hadn’t stolen a glance at her figure. “I thought it might be a nice way to introduce myself and welcome you to the second floor. If I- If I had anything for your little boy, I would’ve brought it over too, but I wasn’t aware that the new neighbor had a little boy.”

She purses her lips. “You don’t gotta act like you care about the new neighbors.”

“I don’t,” you give her that. “But I always go out of my way to try to make the newbies feel welcome- especially when I see that the new neighbor is upset in the hallway with her little boy on my way to the gym.”

That gets Melissa’s false bravado to break just slightly. “Sorry if that disturbed you. It’s the only way I can get him to go down for a nap when he’s like this- all riled up from the move.” 

You just raise a hand and shake your head gently. “No need to apologize. Your singing is a lot less disturbing than the sex I can hear my other neighbors having.”

The redhead can’t help but laugh at the ridiculous comment you just made. “I more meant his crying.”

“Little kids cry- my sister’s kid cries all the time. I’m used to it,” you chuckle softly. “Now seriously, do you need anything? How can I help?”

“I think I’m okay,” she tells you. “But I do appreciate the check in… Sorry I approached the door with a bat.”

You wave a hand in dismissal. “I get it. Being in West Philly by yourself as a woman can be scary- I have to admit I would’ve done the same thing.”

She just smirks at you.

“Well,” you sigh. “Have a good rest of your night, neighbor. Welcome to the second floor.”

You turn on your heel and start to head back down to your own apartment when her voice stops you. “Wait!” You turn back to face her. “I- I never got your name.”

“Y/N,” you smile at her.

“M- Melissa,” is all the redhead can stammer out as she takes a moment to memorize the name to the face. “And my son is JJ.”

“Well, it was really nice to meet you, Melissa. If you need me, I’m just two doors down at 208. Don’t be a stranger,” you wink at her before heading back into your own apartment.

The redhead stands there for a second, not quite knowing how to feel about you. You’re odd- the only Philadelphian who has given her the time of day, and then you wink at her? It’s different, and entirely the opposite of how most Philadelphians are, and somehow, she’s intrigued by you.

It’s the next day when you’re heading back from work that you stop at the Target on your way home to pick up groceries. When you pass the children’s section, you pause before turning your cart down that way. You throw a thing of Play-doh in before continuing down. If you run into Melissa today, you’ll give it to her for her son.

You do end up running into her as she’s trying to unlock her door. She has her son on her hip again, but she’s on the phone this time. She’s shouting into the phone as you pass her with the bags you’ve brought up. You dig through your bags before you hand her the little container filled with the clay for JJ, and she gives you an odd look. You just nod and smile before making your way into your apartment and unloading your groceries. 

When there’s a knock on your door, you jump just slightly as you pull the handmade pizza out of the oven. You set the dinner on the stove before making your way over to the front door. You glance out of your peephole, and there is Melissa with JJ on her hip and giggling with glee as he plays with the Playdoh you bought for him.

“Hey,” you open the door with a smile.

“We thought we would just stop by and say thank you,” the woman bounces the little boy on her hip gently. He giggles, but his eyes don’t leave his hands. “JJ, say thank you to Miss Y/N.”

“Thank you!” he grins as his eyes finally leave the dough in his hands.

Your smile only gets softer as you see how adorable the little guy is. “You’re so welcome. I’m glad you like it!”

“Like it?! I love it!” JJ squeals and kicks his legs with glee. “It’s my favorite color too! How did you know I loved blue?!”

“Thank you,” Melissa tells you gently. “You really didn’t have to do that.”

“I didn’t have to,” you shrug. “But I wanted to.”

The emerald-eyed woman doesn’t quite know what else to say, so there’s a bit of an awkward silence that washes over the two of you.

“Would you two like to come in for dinner? I made homemade pizza,” you offer, hoping to cut the tension and perhaps get to spend a bit of time with your new neighbors from down the hall.

“Pizza?!” JJ’s eyes light up at the word.

Melissa looks down at her son. “Baby, I thought you wanted pasta.”

“But Momma, pizza!” he shouts with enthusiasm.

Green eyes meet yours, as if she’s trying to find whatever game your playing. But you look genuine with your invite. “Are you sure we wouldn’t be intruding?”

“Positive,” you tell her softly. “I wouldn’t have offered if I wasn’t sure.”

Dinner is nice. Melissa is guarded at first, but her walls slowly come down as she truly sees that you have no malicious intention inviting her and her son in. JJ adores you immediately, telling his mother that he’s never had such good pizza. She has to admit too, your pizza is one of the best she’s had. She doesn’t know that your cousin owns a shop down the street, and you’ve tweaked his recipe to be better than the pies he sells.

“Thank you, sweetheart,” you chuckle softly as you start to clean up the meal. Then you glance to his mother. “Care for another glass of wine?”

“As much as I would love to,” she sighs. “I’ve gotta get my little man to get bed.”

“Ah, yes,” you smile. “I totally understand. Well, thanks for coming over.”

“Thank you for having us,” the redhead says genuinely as she wipes the four year old’s face clean of the sauce that’s spread all over. She wipes his hands, and then holds out her own for him to take.

He doesn’t take her hand though, and he instead runs over to you and hugs your leg. Your hand immediately goes to his back and pats it gently with the softest smile on your face.

“Thank you, Miss Y/N.” JJ looks up with you, and his eyes sparkle the way his mother’s do.

“Of course, sweetheart,” you tell him gently, voice warm and smooth like butter. You crouch down to his height and hug him properly.

Melissa watches the two of you with a bit of a twinkle in her eye. She’s in awe of how well you handle him. You’re definitely younger than her, but you have such a way with JJ- maybe it’s because you have a niece or a nephew, she remembers.

You give him one last gentle squeeze before letting him go. “I think your momma’s waitin’ for you, hun.”

He giggles before running over to the redhead and lifting his arms up with a soft request for, “Uppy.” Of course, the mother settles him on her hip with ease, and she tosses a thank you over her shoulder as she makes her way towards your front door. Something stops her though, and she turns back around into the kitchen where you’re washing dishes.

“If you want, you can pop over any time after 7:30 for a glass of wine,” she tells you. “JJ will be down for the night by then.”

“I’ll see you at eight,” you tell her softly, and you wink at her again. 

As Melissa tucks her son in for the night, she can’t help but wonder if you’ll show. There’s a big part of her that hopes that you’ll make your way down the hall, although she can’t quite place why she’s taken such an interest in you. She indeed has taken up an interest in you- you’re meek and mild, a sweet lady who has nothing but the best intentions from what she can see (and that’s quite hard for her to not be pessimistic about you, but you’ve managed to make her believe that you might just be good at the root of it all). You’re completely the opposite of her ex-husband and entirely not her type.

And at eight o’clock sharp, you show up at her door, a bottle of wine in hand.

“Hey,” you sigh softly when she opens the door for you. “I brought wine.”

“Wine’s on me, hun,” the redhead rolls her eyes. “You make dinner on a night where I really didn’t want to cook, so I provide the drinks after. What do you like?”

You shrug. “I’ll drink whatever.”

She pours a glass of red- and while you aren’t necessarily a fan of any type of red blend, you take it and sip on it. It tastes much better when it comes from someone as beautiful as her. 

“So,” you start as you settle on her couch. “Do you wanna talk about that rather heated phone call I caught you in the middle of earlier today?”

She closes her eyes and takes a shaky breath.

“Hey,” you say gently, and you reach a hand out to lay over hers. “If you don’t wanna talk about it, we don’t gotta.”

“Shit soon-to-be ex-husband,” is all she says, and you immediately understand. The frown that washes over your face is one that you can’t hide.

“I’m sorry,” you tell her immediately.

She shrugs. “Caught him fucking the babysitter. He handed me the divorce papers three months ago, and now I’m in a damn custody battle over my son… like hell is he going to get JJ.”

“Custody battle?”

“Yeah,” the redhead groans. “And my lawyer is taking his sweet ol’ time, so right now, I’m shit out of luck.”

“I- I may be able to help you with that one,” you tell her. Her brows raise, and that’s when you reveal what you do for a profession. “I’m a lawyer… specifically in family court.”

TAGS: @schemmentis @thesapphictimelady @marvel210 @itisdoctortoyousir @morgana-larkin @thesamesweetie @doesthatsuggestanythingtoyou @marvels--slut @gwennybriggs @megamultifandomtrashposts @lemz378 @http-sam @melissaschemmentisbranzino @imaginesmultifandoms @sexysapphicshopowner @lilfartbox1 @maybe-a-humanbean @imlike-so-gaydude @sapphicxrat @a-queen-and-her-throne @sunsol-22 @notinmyvocab @melanielaufeyson

#melissa schemmenti fanfiction #melissa schemmenti fanfic #melissa schemmenti x you #melissa schemmenti x reader #melissa schemmenti #abbott elementary fanfic #abbott elementary fanfiction #abbott elementary

[manageablemischiefs-blog]

Let's Reflect On: Peter Pettigrew's erasure from The Marauders by a big portion of the Harry Potter fandom.

Peter Pettigrew was an 11-year-old boy who happened to be in the same compartment of the Hogwarts Express as James Potter, Sirius Black, and Remus Lupin. They all befriended each other through that interaction - through being sorted in the same house, being dormmates, having things in common, being comfortable around each other.

Peter Pettigrew was a twenty-something-year-old man who was threatened to sell his friends to Voldemort. He was a coward, not a follower.

Even Voldemort himself says it:

“[…] Wormtail here has paid some of his debt already, have you not, Wormtail?" He looked down at Wormtail, who continued to sob.  “You returned to me, not out of loyalty, but out of fear of your old friends. You deserve this pain, Wormtail. You know that, don’t you?”“

Harry Potter and The Goblet of Fire, Chapter 33: The Death Eaters

In the end, at the moment of his death, when ordered to strangle Harry he hesitated. Now, we have seen him murder without batting an eyelash, why would he not do the same with Harry?

Here's my take on it:

I believe Wormtail saw Harry as more than a chore, a body to dispose of. He saw him as James' son. His best friend whom he helped killing son. All the guilt and grief he had been trying to justify and push away since that fateful night dawned on him.

Peter had been there for his beginning; for James and Lily’s beginning. He was there at their wedding, at the baby shower (if there was one), for every Christmas since first year... He felt, not sure love, but definitely guilt. He looked at Harry and saw the face of James and the never-quivering eyes that once belonged to Lily. It was much easier living without carrying the responsibility of having cast the spell that ended their lives.

He hesitated, which caused the silver hand Voldemort had given to him to sense that as a sign of weakness and/or disloyalty, leading him to be strangled to death. With such a choice, he saves Harry’s life and, to me, finds redemption for his treason.

I’m not saying you should love Peter or that he was a wonderful human being who should now be showered with flowers and kisses by any means, but he has a story and he has a past. He has a built-up of growing insecurities until he betrays his friends. All of this is essential to understand that the twenty-something-year-old Peter Pettigrew is not the same as Hogwarts student Peter Pettigrew. There’s background and nuance to each character - If we ignore it and pretend he was an idiot through and through it just turns him into an empty character with no real importance in the plot, which is not the case. Don't reduce the complex relationship of the marauders to that.

To expand on the topic, the extraordinary @theprogressofspring has quite an extensive section on their blog labeled In Defense of Peter Pettigrew, with essays that go much more into detail and actually gave me the courage to post this entire thing. In addition, they also began a while ago writing The Life Cycle of the Common Rat; a story from Peter's point of view, tackling the first Wizarding War and refreshing characterizations of young adult marauders and Lily; it was a really tricky time, and sometimes the people we love are cunts and the people we hate are not pure evil.

#thank you if you've reached this far #seriously it means a lot #discussing peter pettigrew #remus lupin #sirius black #peter pettigrew #james potter #the marauders #marauders era #marauders headcanon #anti marauders fandom #harry potter

[hotheadedhero]

Ok question how would the tmnt bros (all 4) react to someone having a crush on them, and they confess, but the turtle rejects at time... but later on he realizes no wait I actually do like them!

But theres already been like a good month or more since the confession and their crush has been sorta avoiding them by hanging out with the other turtle bros and though still being polite, they avoid like being alone with their turtle crush and try to act like they don't have a crush still(but they do)

Sorry if I didn't write the request right! and thanks for your writing I love how you write the turtles!

Frothing at the mouth. No words. Speechless. Thank you so much anon! This request is absolutely amazing and tugged at my heart in all the good ways, you beauty. So glad you like my writing tyty <3 Apologies for the wait btw :] I might have meddled with the idea a bit depending on the turtle but I hope this is the kind of thing you were hoping for! May even make a part 2 continuation because there was just so much to write, this was really a lot of fun so thank you again :P I let fate decide which version to base this on and we got Bayverse!

Rejection, Realisation, and Regret

Warnings: bad language, grovelling turtles for their idiocy, angst with this in mind, oh these boys are some real idiots

Bay Turtles x Reader

Leonardo

Turns you down as gently as he can but it still feels like a sucker punch to the gut. It may sound calloused but he's a ninja, a mutant, a protector before anything else and that includes being someone's boyfriend. With a constructive discussion on the matter, he can only hope that you understand his position. You assured him that you did.

So, then, how is it that he barely gets a conversation in with you these days? And why does that fact burn a hole in his stomach? This pit, although metaphorical, weighs down heavily on him. Assumably, he’s missing one-on-one with a friend until it truly occurs to him just what exactly is going on. There's a lesson to be learned here, he's sure - a saying that goes around as if taken from an ancient script: you don't realise how good you have it until it's gone. You're not gone perse but you make a point of avoiding him individually. As well-mannered as you try to be, he's noticed and he's noticed the hurt in his belly that comes alongside it.

He thought things were okay, that despite the rejection, you would still be able to comfortably continue your friendship without any issues. It seems he managed even to fool himself. Being so caught up in what it means to be one of New York's self-acclaimed protectors, he was completely absentminded to the feelings that had been bubbling up inside him all along. No wonder he's been losing focus on his training as of late. He has attempted to try and talk to you about it but to no avail. Has your heart really been that broken?

For once, he doesn’t know what to do, or what decision should be made. He’s stuck between a rock and a hard place right now. Who's the one person he can turn to at a time like this? Come on. Who else would it be?

"Sensei, you know better than anyone that our position comes with complications. That we as ninjas are sworn to certain oaths.” 

"Yes, the duty of yourself and your brothers is indeed a heavy burden. Responsibility comes with risk and consequence as I am sure you are well aware of by now.” Splinter watches his son bow down as he thoughtfully strokes his beard.  "However, sensei, rat, master; alongside all of these things, I am foremost a father who wishes to see his sons be happy. You're in love, are you not?"

Leo’s attention quickly turns up from the floor to his master. How had he figured it out? Must be that parental instinct. Either way, he’s thankful for that in some respect. It makes this easier. Less complicated. 

The turtle nods and breathes out, "I am, Sensei."

"That's what I thought." His father lays a hand over Leo’s shoulder before it taps him against the side of his head. "Now, what are you waiting for? Talking to me isn't going to change the situation."

Splinter is right. It's high time for him to get out of his funk and strategise the best way to make amends. He can only hope he isn’t too late. 

Raphael

Rejects you thinking it was some sick prank curated by his youngest brother or something. There's no way you have a thing for him. He's a mutant and you're a human. How could someone actually be in love with a freak like himself? That's why he blows up in your face when you attempt to pour your heart out to him. Whatever joke you thought would be funny, isn't. 

He may have taken things out of proportion. This much is made obvious enough by the poorly thought-out excuses you make just to avoid being alone with him. Yeah, that's right, he thinks. You should feel ashamed for trying to pull a stupid stunt like that, for trying to mess with him. He's standing firm on his self-assurance. Don't think for a second that he's going to lose sleep over what he said that day.

However, life has a very funny way of playing its own game. It all comes to fruition when you're laughing with the leader of the brothers. When your hand landed on his forearm, Raphael was struck with something fierce. The shot of jealousy to his heart almost takes him for a wild spin but he disregards it for typical Leo/Raph rivalry. Until that night, anyway. This man is tossing and turning in bed, ruminating on that sickly feeling in his chest; losing sleep over it. No. Surely not. He isn't in love with you. This isn't something that's been in the making for however long now. So what if you managed to calm him down quicker than anyone else he's ever known? Big whoop if you used to make a point of checking up on him when no one dared to go near him. It’s no big deal that you’d hype him up and cheer him on before each mission. 

Fuck. He's been in love with you this whole time, hasn't he? Oh, you have got to be kidding. This was probably the only chance he had at something close to normal in his life and he trampled over it like it was nothing. That's assuming it was even genuinely meant from your end to begin with. He still has his doubts all things considered. Either way, he can’t just sit in bed and wallow in his head all night. He needs some air. 

"What crawled up your shell and died?"

Great. He had hoped to get some peace and quiet. Not that this city knows the definition of either word but that isn’t the point. 

"Not now, Jones. I ain't in the mood."

Casey's head rolls against his shoulders and he sighs, "Hey, if this is to do with (Y/n) ignoring you, what do you expect? 'Can't just make someone cry and expect things to be okay after without an apology."

Raph's mask slowly descends and hoods over his eyes, those of which are now staring down the detective.

"Oh, shit. You didn't know?"

No. No, he did not. He really made you cry? Why would you-? Ah. Two things smack him up the head at this moment: you meant every word of what you admitted a month ago and he is an absolute asshole. Despite already living in the sewers, he feels like the scum of the Earth.

That's it. No more holding back. No more being chicken. He might have ruined his chance but he can at least try and make things right by you.

Donatello

Aloof. Absolutely aloof and utterly clueless to the fact that you were even trying to admit your feelings for him. Yet, the way that the whole situation plays out makes it seem as though he had denied you. His head is usually stuck in a book or on one of the many screens that litter his quarters. What can you really expect of him? Unfortunately, this isn’t something that comes to mind nor is taken into consideration when you attempt your casual proclamation. With his eyes glued to his computer, his inattentiveness could only be read as uninterest to which you find it’s probably best to withdraw yourself. 

In the weeks to come, it still doesn't even occur to him that you were confessing. The only thing that dawns on him from your weirdly abrupt absence is how strange it feels without you around. You still engage in your regular visits to the lair but are always elusive to his corner. Had he missed a memo? He can't quite place a finger on your change in behaviour. Then he realises just how much he enjoys and misses your presence. Even just how you'd pass by his little section of the lair and do something as small as asking him what he's working on. The small details should always get their chance in the spotlight but he managed to miss them when they were right there in front of him. When you were in front of him.

Subsequent to this steady progression of fluttering heart palpitations upon the thought of you and his drying throat when he tries to speak your way, he decides to take some action. At least, that’s the plan he has in his head. You hardly look his way, so he needs to find a way to gain your attention. There must be some way. With somewhat of an idea in mind, he dials a number through his computer and lets it ring. 

The other side of the line picks up and there’s a voice. “If this has anything to do with goons, aliens or whatever trouble you guys have gotten yourselves into, I don’t want any part of it.”

“Relax, Vern. This is something that entirely requires your expertise without life endangerment. I need to ask about women,” Donnie confirms, cutting right to the chase.

There’s a pause. "What-?” Another longer pause and then an inhale. “Can't you just ask one of your brothers or something?"

Yeah, right, because his family of sewer dwellers are so well-equipped for this matter. Even asking for Vern's aid is pushing the boat a little but it's better than nothing - a baseline structure of what to expect is all he needs. The internet would probably be more reliable but it doesn’t include that vital real-world experience.

"You engage in frequent courting. By all accounts, you're the only person I know who has enough field experience to give advice."

This might be giving Vern too much credit but this is a surefire way to get what he wants. Feeding a man's ego can accomplish many things. Call it manipulation of the circumstances if you will but no harm done. 

"You know what?” There’s a brightness in his tone, an uptilted cadence in Vern’s rhetorical question. Bingo. “You being the smart one has never been more accurate, Don. Alright, I'll help you."

The notes he takes are unfathomable but he wants to make sure that everything is thought out with careful precision. That's not even taking into account that he needs to muster the courage to ask you out in the first place.

Michelangelo

One would think that this guy would be jumping with unparalleled joy to have someone confess their feelings for him but he's got eyes for someone else. April O'Neil is his one true babycake, his angel face, the first love he had ever known. He turns you down in the friendly way one would expect him to if not a little cocky. Who wouldn't want a piece of the MC Mikey? There aren’t any hard feelings though, right?

Well, no but the sting that follows is still too much for you to handle. Too much in fact that you decide it's best to recoil into a shell of your own and spend less time with the loveable terrapin. Such a shame as well considering you're missing out on your regular gaming sessions together. It probably sucks big time to be rejected but he meant no harm by it. He thought you could still hang out as you normally would. Perhaps you just needed some time. That’s what he reckoned until the days turned to weeks and those weeks to almost two months. 

He’s subjected to playing bystander when you hang out with his family, barely getting a chance to have a word with you alone. If this treatment is good for anything, it gives him a chance to spectate and watch how you interact with those around you rather than directly with him. He recognises how much he adores that sparkle in your eyes, the playfulness of your tone when you crack out jokes with his brothers, how you light up the entire lair when you make your presence known. There is this unshakable spirit within you that he somehow never noticed until a few days prior when you took the liberty of playing an incredibly bold practical joke at Casey's expense. Man, this turtle's heart sored higher than it ever has before, which is saying something considering he had to jump out of a plane once.

Well, colour him surprised. He was so sure of himself that New York's favourite journalist was the only one for him but it seems he was wrong. Oh, man. He's feeling pretty bad now. He can surely make up for what happened though, right? Hopefully. There's only one way of finding out but he has one thing he needs to do first before talking to you.

"I'm sorry, angel face. My sights have been led astray. My loyalty shouldn’t be doubted but it’s for someone else now.” 

The way Mikey is knelt down, head lowered with April’s hands in his own is a perplexing sight if not curiously amusing. His feelings and the pronounced “dibs” on the reporter have been no secret but his recent infatuation with you hasn’t been much of a secret either. Not to her anyway but she likes to think she’s good at picking up on these things. 

“Just know that you'll always have a special place in my heart,” he finishes, ending the overly dramatised display by holding a fist to his chest. 

"Considerate as always." Her expression is somewhere between humoured and endeared, fighting the shake of her head at how adorably ridiculous this turtle can be. "Thanks, Mikey."

Now that's out of the way, he can go into this with a clear head. Although, the only thing really going into this is going to be all of his heart.

#tmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt x reader #tmnt bayverse #tmnt 2014 #tmnt 2016 #leonardo #leo #raphael #raph #donatello #donnie #michelangelo #mikey #x reader #headcanon #headcannons #light angst #rejection #request #writing requests #ask #answered #anon

[042502]

Enemies // M. Sturniolo x Reader.

SYNOPSIS: You and Matt are archenemies, he constantly harasses you at school. But one day something slips out of his hands.

WARNINGS: violence, enemies-lovers, insults, attacks, bullying, among others.

NOTES: My first language is not English, so if you find any grammatical errors you already know why :)

MASTERLIST!!

You found yourself pressing that pencil tightly against the table. You had so much anger inside, You needed him to shut his damn mouth once and for all.

All he does is be a stupid rich nerd. As if that were a big deal, He's just a son of a bitch.

"Hey" he shouts at you. "Don't they teach low-income people not to scratch school tables?"

He had this stupid arrogant expression on his face. You wanted so badly to kick him in the face until you disfigured his face and eliminated that damn expression.

"I guess they didn't teach you that, Because your parents had to share ten new pencils, true?"

The class ended and we were grateful that it was like this. You couldn't stand his presence more than necessary. You grab all your things and leave the room.

Why so much hate towards Matt Sturniolo?

In addition to the aforementioned, he was a fucking idiot. He thinks it's all about him, Never in history have you seen a fucking nerd be the popular kid who puts everyone down, Since when is this like this?

He harassed you, like bullying. But that's already in the past, you wouldn't let him abuse you anymore.

You were walking at a fast pace through the hallways, eager to leave damn school. But out of nowhere something hits you from your left and you stumble.

A door opens with the weight of your body and you are dragged inside, the door closes and you find yourself trapped with Sturniolo.

"Didn't you have enough? Does your lab rat girlfriend not have enough fun for you?"

Mention that standing up, You discover that are in reduced storage.

"From time to time you have to take care of pets."

"I'm not a pet."

"If he throws a branch at you... Would you go after her?" He just implied that you were a bitch.

"What did you say?"

"What you heard."

"I'm sorry, but I don't listen to Nerds" you push Matt's chest with your hands, causing his back to hit the door.

"Well, I want to clarify that I value your option as much as what a white pencil writes."

"Your parents will have all the money in the world, Matt..." I smile proudly. "But you have poor tastes."

Low blow for the new toy Matt had gotten in recent months, It was a new foreign girl, I was almost as stupid as Matt, a complete nerd who thinks she's big just for being the new one at sucking Matt's cock.

"Hey, I'm sorry sweet peach, It's not that you don't make me bigger, but if you were in a coma I would disconnect you to charge my third phone" stands firm. "You should worry less about me and more about your eyebrows being even."

"Fuck you Sturniolo!" you tear off the stupid glasses that adorned his damn blue eyes, the parts and you throw it to the ground to step on it.

"Oh no, you just destroyed my glasses 78" use a fake sad tone. "Come on, you still have to destroy 22, but don't worry" smile. "I can buy another 22 more."

"You're so stupid, What the fuck are you looking for?"

"I want to see you suffer like the bitch you are, that you kneel for me and beg."

"Tell your Spanish girlfriend to suck your cock well."

"You're not understanding me, not even if you are the last woman in the point I would let you suck my cock."

"It's not something that fascinates me, Now get out of the fucking door once and for all."

You pushed him and before you can open the door he catches you, His face was so close to yours, Their breaths mixed with each other.

"fuck you..."

"fuck me."

Matt's lips catch yours, it was so painful, His teeth spared your lower lip and you pushed him away from you with both hands.

"Fuck you, you idiot!"

You open the door and leave, bringing your hand to your lips, I was bleeding like shit.

"Shit."

What the hell was all that?

NOTES: I don't know what the fuck I just wrote, just ignore it.

Remember to hit the heart and share it with your friends! Thanks for reading^^ If you want to be part of the taglist leave a comment!

TAGLIST: @luverboychris @alexandernvr @prisciliin @sturncakez @imwetforyourmom @hotreaderliin @tillies33ssss @sturnioloxlver @jnkvivi @stvrniolowh0re @dirtylittleheartsworld

#sturniolo triplets #matt sturniolo #matt sturniolo x reader #໒✦⋮ 𝟬𝟰𝟮𝟱𝟬𝟮 ༄ ˀˀ #matt sturniolo x you #matt sturniolo smut #matt sturniolo fanfiction #matt sturniolo fluff #chris sturniolo #chris sturniolo fanfic #christopher sturniolo #matthew sturniolo #matt x reader #matt sturniolo fanfic #matt sturniolo imagine #matthew bernard sturniolo #nick sturniolo #sturniolo #chris sturniolo fluff #chris sturniolo smut #chris sturniolo soft #chris sturniolo x reader #chris sturniolo x you #christopher owen sturniolo #christopher sturniolo x reader #nicolas sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo fluff #sturniolo imagine #sturniolo triplets smut

[bidisastersanji]

we all know and love the Sanji loves ratatouille Headcanon but hear me out- ratatouille AU where - and here’s the thing- Zoro is Linguine and Sanji is Colette? The Baratie chefs as the rest of the criminal chefs?? (I killed a man. With THIS. THUMB.)

Sanji being furious at this random garbage boy and his garbage hair who suddenly makes a good soup and what ??? He needs to teach him things now? After all the hard work he’s put into getting into this field this guy is handed an opportunity on a platter?

And yet. They grow closer, start dating?! And then they find out that Zoro was Chef Mihawk’s biological son but he doesn’t want to be in the limelight and pushes for Sanji to take over the restaurant once they get rid of the shitty owner Charlotte LinLin

The way he fucking loses it when he learns that his idiot boyfriend’s cooking came from a RAT all along !?? And Sanji falls for him even more because he used to feed rodents as a kid and get in trouble for it with his abusive family

They have the whole fiasco with the health authorities and the Baratie closes down. They open his very own bistro where they always feed those who are hungry.

#zosan fic idea #what do you guys think? #would this work #zosan #zoro x sanji #roronoa zoro #black leg sanji #one piece #one piece zosan

[its-your-mind]

MAG 4 IS A FUCKIN TRIP AND A HALF, Y’ALL

In ONE (1) episode we meet BOTH gerry keay (my beloved book burning old man beating goth son) and Mary Keay (bitchass evil book lady horrible mother burn her ass), AND we hear the story of Mike Crew (sexy sky king), A N D we are introduced to the Library of Jurgen Leitner (stupid idiot motherfucking jurgen leitner goddamn fool book collecting dust eating rat old-)

We also learn that mary is supposed to be DEAD and gerry is supposed to be the one who KILLED HER, but before we have a chance to process aNY of this information we get smacked out of left field by jonathan “most of the stories in the archives are bullshit drug trips” jarchivist sims immediately going “oh leitner? fuck that guy. for real, tho. gotta go tell elias that apparently his books are still floating around out there so that we can send every person who works for the magnus institute out and destroy them all. Dangerous evil books.”

AND T H E N before we can process THIS character development, jon proclaims that he would like to meet the weird goth dude who purportedly killed and skinned his own mother. Cuz one guy said that this dude burned a leitner one (1) time. No mention of the murder of the mother is made.

11/10 episode. No notes, Jonny.

#tma liveblog #tma #the magnus archives #mag 4 #gerry keay #gerry delano #mary keay #mike crew #jurgen leitner #jonathan sims #GOD I love a good tma relisten

[shygirl4991]

True Color

Summary: SMG3 was told by eggman to kill SMG4 his ex rival, deep down he knew he couldn't bring himself to harm someone he grew close to so he comes up with a plan to trick eggman. Except SMG4 wasn’t a part of the plan, the man on the floor crying not only over his dead meme but at the fact his friend and crush was about to kill him. Will SMG3 be able to live through his fight with Eggman and finally admit his true feelings, he better cause there's no way a great villain like him will lose!

Tags: Fluff and Angst, Attempted murder, love confessions, first kiss, enemies to friends to lovers

SMG3 chuckles to himself dealing with Depresso was nothing, who knew this man was so weak to rats. As he walks outside his old friend Eggman follows, he is sure to be bowing down to the proof that Three hasn't lost his touch when it comes to evil. Eggman smiles, placing a hand on his shoulder “Congrats, SMG3! There’s only one final test before you can be called a true villain again.” Three smirks, this will be easy who said you couldn't be evil and still have your hero friends by your side.

“You must kill your arch nemesis!” He shows his phone revealing footage of his Eggdog cam. How did eggman know about the camera in Four’s room? How long has he been watching the man, he made a mistake putting that camera in his room. He only did it to make sure that nothing would happen to four, now look at what he did. He felt a chill go down his back as it now hit him, Eggman wants him to kill his ex rival. The meme guardian in charge of living memes, his friend. He looks down in shock as Eggman pats his back laughing “Can't wait to see it friend!” 

Three was at his new home, sitting on his bomb chair staring at the gun in his hand. He can feel himself shaking at the thought of aiming it at SMG4, so many years of trying to kill the man and he did it all without any emotion besides anger. Things have changed so much, he remembers when he was about to die when he dropped the character he played as for so many years to finally tell SMG4 that they were friends. The day they did the heist to get his notebook back, how relaxed the two were drinking coffee when he was hit with a drawing idea and doodled the two together with coffee. Then the memory of the day everything changed for him, when him and Four held hands learning about their power and about zero. 

He points the gun at the picture of SMG4 shaking and fires, the moment he pulls the trigger he focuses on his old anger bringing his old character out.  “Finally I have a reason to kill that bozo!” He focuses on the pain he felt on Christmas when SMG4 brought up old memories. He screams as he shoots down the photo of SMG4 letting out all the anger on it, he can do this he can kill that idiot. Eggdog jumps surprised at what his father did during his private bath time, barking at his meme parent annoyed as he watches the man open a chest. “Ooooo i wonder how i should kill him! Dismemberment?” he then takes out gamer bath water out of the chest “Maybe waterboarding?” 

Seeing his father bringing out his old persona makes him start barking furiously at him, SMG3 freezes hearing his son's words before glaring at him “What do you mean? I don't care about SMG4, he sucks!” his mind yelled at him calling him a liar as he crossed his arms “I’ve had no character development with him.” He can't let it fall if he loses character then those feelings come back, he won't be able to impress his old friends. Eggdog had it with his father as he yelled back at him reminding him of all the nights he would gush about SMG4 to him, how he has become happier since the two became friends. It was becoming overwhelming for him as he covered his ears “La la la i can't hear you!

As he leaves his home he stares at the castle, he feels his hand shaking again “Damn it..Eggdog is right what am i doing, why am i trying to impress people from my past?” He remembers how insane SMG4 went trying to make the perfect video to please all his viewers. Three clenches his fist “Right…RIGHT! I can't impress everyone. The person I should be impressing is myself, and I find myself impressive enough!”

He needed a plan, so he walked up to the castle with gun in hand as Eggman walked up next to him “Are you ready?”  Three smirks “Oh yeah, this is gonna be easy!” He was always a fast thinker he knew the moment he stepped into that castle Eggman was done for.  SMG4 was humming happily as he finally learned how to hand craft memes thanks to the help of Three. SMG3 opens the door to the kitchen looking around to figure out a way out of this mess, SMG4 turns excitedly “Oh hey three!” he twitches at the nickname. He wasn't sure when the man shortened his name but everytime he hears it his heart flutters.

“I was just inventing a new meme. I call him, tomato soop and his catchphrase is gonna be BLERHG.” SMG3 stares at the meme as Four was showing it off, the idiot has so much trust in him he wouldn’t see his death coming. His stomach twisted at the thought, then he blinked at the meme. A tomato that when squish color could be mistaken for blood, SMG4 finishes explaining the meme smirking at him hoping his new meme was impressing his crush “Pretty memey right?” 

Three walks forward, his eyes dark as he goes over his plan in his head, on one hand a voice was telling him to do it. SMG4 hasn't done anything for him so why let him live? But that wasn't him that was the old him that he made to protect himself in a world that saw him as evil. SMG4 eyes drop down noticing the gun “Oh a glock!” he starts to get nervous “Whatcha…gonna do with that…” once SMG3 got close enough he decided what he had to do “Oh…something i should have done long ago.” He points the gun at SMG4 causing panic in the man, this couldn't be happening this isn't the SMG3 he knows why would he point a gun at him “THREE WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?” 

Three’s eyes flicker to the newly made meme, he had to do it to protect him, his gaze softened as he looked back at Four “I’m sorry… I have to do this.” SMG4 shakes unsure what was going on then the gun moved slightly to his left and fired, Four blinks and slowly turns to see Three had shot his newly made meme getting tomato juice all over the window. Eggman lets out an evil smile seeing the red splatter on the window, he walks into the castle laughing “Ho hoo good job. I guess I underestimated your evil intentions 3.  I’m glad my old evil buddy is still-” he freezes seeing a tomato with a gunshot wound “Hey what the fuck?” 

SMG3 smirks as he charges at Eggman jumping up and kicking him in the face, while he may not be as fast and flexible as his partner he still had his talents in his strength. “Sike Mother fucker!” SMG4 runs to his meme with his eyes starting to water “My tomato soup meme!” SMG3 places his hands on his hips, annoyed at his other half “DUDE! Dont ruin my epic twist! I was actually considering killing you! Like usual…” he added the last bit to make sure he wasn't showing his true emotions. 

Hearing that line made Four forget about his meme as he looked at SMG3 heartbroken “You were actually going to kill me?!” that can be true could it? He felt his tears escape knowing that he would have been dead if SMG3 didn't change his mind at the last minute, what did it mean was everything they went through all for nothing? He starts crying loudly causing SMG3 to smack him, Four was startled from the hit looking at the man who was glaring at the spot Eggman was at.

Eggman gets up “I KNEW YOU DIDN'T HAVE IT IN YOU!”

SMG3 rolls his eyes “Nah i think murder isn't very evil villainy, you people should know all villains have a code. Plus PAIN AND SUFFERING IS MORE MY STYLE!” Eggman looks down at Three who had a huge shit eating grin “Pathetic,” he now knows that SMG3 was a lost cause. But he still had some hope that something would knock common sense back to Three “All villains murder!” he takes out a rocket launcher “Allow me to demonstrate!” He points the rocket to SMG3. The man only smiles at Eggman; he spent his whole life with weapons pointed at him and eldritch gods trying to kill him, an egg-shaped villain doesn't scare him.

That was until the weapon moved targets, his eyes going wide as he watched Eggman point the rocket at SMG4. He growls at Eggman as he dashes at the man moving the rocket to not hit Four, the rocket flies out hitting the roof of the castle, an old man in a bathtub falls down confusing the pair for a moment. Seeing Eggman distracted he turns and punches the man, picking up the man on the floor he smirks ready to give the man a beating for even thinking about killing SMG4. 

“I DON'T NEED TO PROVE SHIT!” he was done with the world making him a villain, he won't let anyone change him again. Eggman, finally understanding his old friend is gone, decides to teach Three a lesson, calling his ride down squishing Three he launches them up in the air “Enjoy your last breath!”

The higher they went the more he was struggling to breath, his vision was getting blurring as he took deep breaths. An idea hits him as he turns trying to keep his breathing steady from the height “Why don't you go and steal the moon or something.” He starts to take apart the vehicle. SMG4 walks outside with his injured meme looking up at the sky confused, scared and nervous about what was going on. SMG3 looks down then back at what he was doing as he removes the last part causing the vehicle to malfunction. SMG3 takes one last deep breath, he was a meme guardian he will trust his power that falling from this height won't kill him. He winks at eggman before letting go and falling off, SMG4 drops his meme running around in a panic trying to guess where the man was going to land.

He dives, catching SMG3 quickly and lifts up the man checking if he is okay. SMG3 coughs trying to bring oxygen to his lungs “SMG4?” he turns and looks at the man's face “Yeah it's me, i don't know what the hell is going on but..i'm so glad you're okay..you are okay right?” Three coughs feeling his lungs burn, the world still looked blurry for him as Four did his best to make sure the man was comfy by laying  him on his lap.

SMG4 starts to cry again feeling so many conflicting emotions he felt he was going to just blow from all of it, he holds Three’s hand shaking slightly “Even after everything…were you really going to kill me…do you still hate me?” Hearing the pain and sadness in Fours voice broke SMG3's character, maybe for once he can let himself show to stop his idiot from crying. Weakly he reaches for SMG4 face “No you idiot, sure it was tempting since on christmas you made a shitty comment without thinking but i could never kill you…you mean too much to me.” Four’s eyes go wide as he wipes his tears, Three coughs annoyed by the pain he feels “HEY STAY WITH ME uh er maybe i have a first aid kit for this wait for me!”  He gently put Three on the floor and was going to run inside only to be stopped. 

He turned to see Three grabbing his hand “Hey..Four..thank you for being my friend.” SMG4 heart flutters finally hearing Three call him by his nickname “Hey now you're not going anywhere,” he wiggles free to sprint inside getting the first aid kit.  After taking care of Three they both sit together outside looking at the sky, Three was starting to feel better as he leaned on Four “I know today must have been a shit show for you, so in short I had old friends try to change me but you know what SMG4?” the man hums as he waters his meme helping it feel better.

Suddenly Three turned his face getting close, Four blushed unsure what was happening “I realized i don't need to prove to anyone how evil i am. I don't need to prove anything because I'm happy just the way I am.” SMG4 smiles softly at him leaning into his touch “heh well i'm happy your you to three, you had me scared you know i really thought i did something wrong or…you lied about being friends again.”

SMG3 frowns at the memory, he did a lot of bad in the past to think he was here at this moment with someone he used to want dead. Now the thought of anything happening to Four made him sick, it made him angry. It then clicked to him all those confusing feelings he had these past months, he was falling for his rival after everything they went through he grew to love the man in front of him. He would kill for this man, he would die for him. Four was giving a confused look to Three wondering why he was still caressing his face only for his eyes to go wide as Three leaned forward kissing him.

SMG4 felt as though his body was being electrocuted from the sparks he was feeling from the kiss, dropping the watering can he turns his body and wraps his arms around Three’s neck kissing him back. Eggman’s plan was to bring SMG3 back to the dark side but all he did was show Three just how amazing the light was, he won't ever let this go no one will ever lay a hand on his SMG4 as long as he lives. 

It was the next day and SMG3 smirks as he traumatizes Steve by telling him his sandwich was made of chicken, he does his evil laugh not noticing his boyfriend was rolling his eyes “I see some things never change huh?” Four pats Three’s back only to get a smirk from the other man “Hey now scrub you say this but you wouldn't have me any other way!”

Four chuckles and nods “I wouldn't want you any other way three, now uh could i get my coffee i have been waiting here for an hour.”

“Nope, just cause you're dating me doesn't mean you can skip the line now go sit and wait or i'm going to make you wait even more!”  Four signs before letting out a smirk he quickly kisses Three’s cheek making the man's face go red “WHAT THE!? THATS IT NOW YOUR NOT GETTING SHIT YOU…YOU…baka.” he lets out a soft smile before going back to work red in the face.

#smg4 #shygirl4991 #smg34 #smg3 #smg4 smg3 #smg43 #smg34 fanfiction #fluff and angst #love confessions #first kiss

[goobersforlife]

BRACKETS ARE UP!

AND HERE THEY ARE!

This is side A brackets

Participants-

(camp hamato) CH! Leo & Vincenzo - belonging to @p0t3nt1al

Rose Jones- belonging to @omgselinabeckendorf

Hamato Giovanni- belonging to @enthblaze

(universal mayhem) UM!Foxy, Venus, Peter, April- belonging to @trixanimations

UWG!Donnie and IitM!Leo- belonging to @witchybluedeity

orange- belonging to @itsnotillegalyet07

Misa- belonging to @littlemissartemisia

(Lab rats sons) LRS!One- belonging to @rubberducky2pointoh

Mikey, and (chaotic time travel) CTT! F!Donnie and Dahlia-belonging to @cats-inthe-cradle

kirby- belonging to -@tomatoshapedstars

(turtles all the way down) TATWD!Murasaki & mizuiro- belonging to @pommigranite

(Green eyed mask) GEM!Casey Jr- belonging to @azucar-skull

Vassari, Donnie, paris, zink- belonging to @angelcorpse230

(Rabbits broach) RB! Aristotle and Plato Umigame- belonging to @pigeonsgrame

Toby Sage Darner -belonging to @flockofcrowsinatrenchcoat

(once more with feelings) OMWF! Jasper, and bell - belonging to @tuatara-time

Artie-belonging to @faemorningstar

Donatello & Genetrix- belonging to @tmnt-starlit-sin

Kirby Hamato- belonging to @darth-sonny

(Teenage Turtle Ninja mutants)TTNM! donnie, mikey, raph and leo- belonging to @idiot-mushroom

Yuchi, Cali, Mikey, and the QUILT! Au turtles- belonging to @cokowiii @cokoweee

(starblind) Yuchi, Leo- belonging to @dancingthesambaa

(Queen of the birds)QOTB!Leo- belonging to @just-another-wren

Robo!Rise Donnie, Raph, Leo, and Mikey- belonging to @zinovi768

Leonette- belonging to @leonette-soup

Timothy- belonging to @pinetreevillain

Sunflower- belonging to @agentturtlecupcake

These are side A participants, I will reblong with side B’s participants soon

Good luck, and have fun!

(also lmk if I got someone's username wrong, or anything like that, so that I made tag the right person :3)

and its smaller twin

BRACKETS SIDE B

Goober comp brackets! Side b | Bracket HQ

BRACKET HQ

side b of the baskets

Participants-

TMNA! rafa, doni, miguel and leo- belonging to @matutito

(giant mutant toddler turtles) GMTT! Raph, Mikey,Leo, Donnie- belonging to @bambiraptorx

(open your shell to find your wings) OYSTFYW!Donnie, and snapsonnie! -belonging to @onejellyfishplease

Kraang Subprime- belonging to @optimalminds

HorrorAU! Donnie, Raph, Mikey, leo- belonging to @hyperfixated-homo

(not hero material)NHM!Raph, mikey, donnie, leo- belonging to @peanutrat20

Iridiana- belonging to @chipistotallysane

(raised by kraang)RBK! April, and (raised by foot) RBF Casey- belonging to @apollothesunrat

Venus, Leo, Raph, and Donnie- belonging to @fxliciq-a

Pondside! Raph, Donnie, Leo, Mikey-belonging to @purple-the-turtle

Milkshake and Waffles- belonging to @sleepis4theweak

That concludes side b’s particapents

Wishing you guys luck, and can't wait to see what happens

Also side note, if you do anything to break the rules, you will be eliminated from the competition, please be respectful. And enjoy

#Announcements #Brackets #Thank you all who participated #Edit #Sorry for the ping #I had to make some changes to the brackets

[gabigabigabby]

spain's biggest fan | p. gavi

part one

part two

pablo gavi x kaká!reader

a/n: i've read so many of these socmed au's, people are so hilarious 😂 also i can't think of a title, can u tell? this is a looong one, sry in advance. also i got super invested in this and will be making a part 2!

synopsis: spain's golden boy managed to score a goal at the world cup — and a brazilian?

face claim: jenna ortega

pablogavi

liked by romeobeckham, ynkaka and 2,309,815 others

pablogavi Partido muy completo del equipo, el domingo a por más! 💪🏽🔴🔵 [Very complete match of the team, on Sunday let's go for more! 💪🏽🔴🔵]

view all 6,355 comments

pedri Muy bien cabrón 😝 [Very good, bastard 😝]

liked by pablogavi

gavifan1 u and lewa are so 🩷🩷

ynkaka 💪🏽

liked by pablogavi

ynfan y/n liked n commented 🥹

gavifan2 are they friends?

barcafan1 she's friends w raphinha

gavixyn we don't show raphinha enough love for bringing y/n and gavi together 😭

ynfan2 can u all just chill out, we don't even know if they're seeing each other or not

ynkaka

liked by raphinha, neymarjr and 8,303,860 others

ynkaka just another day at work before the world cup. thank god

view all 22,313 comments

raphinha Sangue é incrível!! Eu adoraria estar coberto de sangue pelo meu trabalho [Blood is amazing!! I would love to be covered in blood for my work]

ynkaka raphinha vou enviar alguns pra você [i will send some to you]

richarlison Tão bom y/n 😂 [So good y/n 😂]

liked by ynkaka

neymarjr Kkkkkkkk

liked by ynkaka

pedri Bicho raro. Como trabajas asi [Weirdo. how do you work like this]

ynkaka pedri no tan dificil amigo [not so hard, friend]

pablogavi 😍😂

liked by ynkaka

ynfan3 are u filming scream?! desperately in need for scream 7 😭

pabsandyn pablo's comment 🥰

gavifan3 they're probably just friends chill out

pablogavi

Doha, Qatar

liked by raphinha, ynkaka and 3,274,955 others

pablogavi Hola Qatar, eres hermoso ❤️🇶🇦 [Hello Qatar, you are beautiful ❤️🇶🇦]

view all 1,734,050 comments

ynkaka 🥰

liked by pablogavi

pablogavi 🥰

ynkaka where are the photo credits man! 😭

pablogavi ynusername sorry🥺

gavixyn is he learning english?? 🥹

pedri Ahí es donde fuiste? Con ella?? Te estaba buscando idiota [That's where you went? With her?? I was looking for you idiot]

pablogavi pedri cálmate perro [calm down dog]

raphinha Cuidala o Neymar te va a matar 😂 [Take care of her or Neymar will kill you 😂]

pablogavi raphinha 😂

gavifan2 omg they're together in qatar! 🥹

ynfan2 y/n is there to support leomessi too!

gavifan4 how do u know

ynfan5 she literally has said publicly that she's a huge fan of messi and that she supports argentina 😒

ynkaka

Doha, Qatar

liked by pablogavi, pedri and 4,959,922 others

ynkaka im here leomessi

view all 649,200 comments

courteneycoxofficial Caption sounds... scary.

ynkaka courteneycoxofficial i don't mean it like that... i-

screamfan1 courteneycoxofficial i miss gale and y/c/n 😭

leomessi ❤️

liked by ynkaka

pedri Tus pestañas son tan largas [Your lashes are so long]

ynkaka pedri eso es un cumplido o no [is that a compliment or no]

pablogavi Revisar textos <3

liked by ynkaka

gavifan2 omg gavi just told y/n to check her texts 🥹

ynfan3 gavifan2 they would be so cute together omg

neymarjr Me encontre no meu quarto de hotel antes de sair com o Senhor Cute Boy [Meet me at my hotel room before you go out with Mr. Cute Boy]

ynkaka neymarjr sim chefe [yes boss]

neyandyn5ever neymar and y/n's friendship is so good

ynkaka

liked by pablogavi, neymarjr and 9,374,010 others

ynkaka how'd i get here

view all 1,749,954 comments

pablogavi ❤️

liked by ynkaka

pedri Eres tan valiente para tomar una foto de una rata [You're so brave to take a photo of a rat]

pablogavi pedri bobo [idiot]

ynkaka pedri i know right? 😝

pedrifan1 pedri is so cold for that 😂😂

neymarjr O amor é tão bom em você Y/n [Love is so nice on you Y/n]

ynkaka neymarjr o amor é nojento [love is gross]

pablogavi ynkaka muchas gracias 🙄 [thanks a lot 🙄]

frenkiedejong ❤️

liked by ynkaka and pablogavi

pabsandyn so cute!! 🩷

liked by ynkaka

ynfan3 is that gavi?? where are they?

gavifan1 yep they're both in qatar for the wc

pablogavi

liked by ynkaka, jkeey4 and 2,849,100 others

pablogavi Buena comida con esa chica de Scream [Good food with that girl from Scream]

view all 29,471 comments

ynkaka yep. apenas aquela garota de scream. [yep. just that chick from scream.]

liked by pablogavi

pedri Me sorprende que no te haya apuñalado en la boca [I'm surprised she didn't stab you in the mouth]

liked by ynkaka

pablogavi pedri 🙄

frenkiedejong Que bueno que fuiste al lugar que te recomende 😂 [Good thing you went to the place I recommended you 😂]

pablogavi frenkiedejong 😂😂

ynfan4 y/n in a ponytail >>

liked by pablogavi

gavifan3 gavi's a scream fan

ynkaka correct.

ynfan1 ynkaka omg thank god.

ferrantorres Gusto 😌 [Taste 😌]

liked by pablogavi and ynkaka

jkeey4 Winner winner chicken dinner!!!

liked by pablogavi

pablogavi jkeey4 😂

ynkaka

Lusail Stadium

liked by neymarjr, richarlison and 5,299,505 others

ynkaka WORLD CU-U-UP!

tagged: pablogavi

view all 39,775 comments

pablogavi COPA MUNDIALLL [WORLD CUP]

liked by ynkaka

pablogavi Spain's biggest fan 🇪🇸🤝🇧🇷

ynkaka pablogavi good english, kid 🥰

liked by pablogavi

richarlison O que aconteceu com a minha camisa, cara???? Você rasgou?! [What happened to my jersey, dude??? Did you shred it?!]

ynkaka richarlison NÃO SEU IDIOTA!! eu mantenho isso seguro em meu coração! cu de palhaço [no, you idiot!! i keep it safe in my heart! clown ass]

gavixyn gavi finally gave a girl his jersey!!! i'm so glad it's youuuu 🩷🩷

liked by ynkaka and pablogavi

pedri Vamonosss España!! 🇪🇸 [Let's go, Spain!! 🇪🇸]

liked by ynkaka

sergioramos No puedo esperar a verte en nuestros colores!! ¡No todos los días ves a un brasileño usar los colores de España! 🇪🇸🤝🇧🇷 [Cannot wait to see you in our colors!! Not everyday you see a Brazilian wear Spain colors!]

liked by ynkaka and pablogavi

ynkaka sergioramos obrigado lenda 😘

ynfan5 i'm at the world cup too!! Hope i see you 🩷

pablogavi

Lusail Stadium

liked by ynkaka, ferrantorres and 2,308,341 others

pablogavi Es un honor poder jugar mi primer Mundial con la sefutbol ¡Vamos a por todas! 🇪🇸👊🏽 #fifaworldcup #qatar2022 [It's an honor to be able to play my first World Cup with the sefutbol, let's go for it all! 🇪🇸👊🏽]

view all 4,869 comments

pedri ❤️🇪🇸

liked by pablogavi

raphinha ¡Enhorabuena! 👊🏽 [Congratulations! 👊🏽]

liked by pablogavi

ynkaka orgulhoso de você, amorzinho 🩷 [proud of you, love 🩷]

liked by pablogavi

pablogavi ynkaka mi amor 🩷 [my love 🩷]

mikkykiemeney beautiful 🤍

liked by pablogavi and ynkaka

ferrantorres ❤️

gavifan1 so proud of you Pabs ❤️

gavifan2 love you Pablo 🤍

ynfan2 Y/n's comment got me 🥺🥺 congrats Gavi! ❤️

#pablo gavi #gavi x reader #fc barcelona #pedri #gavi x yn #gavi x you #pedri gonzalez #pablo martín páez gavira #football x reader #fifa world cup #spanish football

[cebwrites]

affection headcanons (Law, Zoro)

a/n: i’m revisiting this since it’s been roughly a year since i made my very first x reader post on this blog!! 🥳 i still stand by the old ones i wrote for mihawk and don’t have anything else to add for him so hawkeye’s idiot green son will have to fill in for him 💔

masc reader, they/he law word count: 1k

Law

Their affection, once earned, is quiet; Law is a lot more comfortable showing how much they care for you through their actions rather than words - making sure you’re eating right, subconsciously monitoring your wellbeing, and most of all - allowing you into their personal space

Don’t get him wrong, they still seclude themself away from the crew more than they should, seeking the comfort of being cooped away in their office for long hours of the day with only short breaks to eat or (attempt to) sleep, but these days they can’t seem to find the right rhythm unless he can hear your idle movement in the background

When they need proper alone time you acquiescence, and when you need to interact with the crew to prevent boredom, on occasion, Law will let you drag them out with you to socialize for a short while - and once they run out of batteries? You get to have his head resting on your shoulder, one hand on your captain’s thigh, or cuddle with their face buried in your chest 

Law doesn’t think themselves as a super affectionate person, and to a certain extent that’s very much true, but all it takes is a few months away from you, without your touch, without the steady thrum of your heartbeat in his ear and they’re a little worse for wear - they miss the physicality

It’s all internal, “where it should stay” they might add, but those close to Law pick up on their longing for you, the ache, how he might shy away from comfort even more to avoid any reminders of you even though that’s what they need the most

It’d be unfair to ask that you threw away your sedentary life to traverse stormy seas just so you’d be by their side though it luck would have that you were already among the Heart’s ranks, a quiet part of Law revels in that - it wants to be selfish, it wants to be possessive, that even if harm could come your way that it would be sure enough they would protect you no matter what

But of course Law would never admit to it, so they begrudgingly relent to Bepo’s “I can’t sleep alone tonight”s and Penguin and Shachi’s whining for just one more game of cards, knowing full well that this is more for themself than their beloved childhood friends and he appreciates them even more for making the effort for his stubborn ass

Or maybe they would, though only when you’ve long been swept away to the land of dreams, when Law’s insomnia gets the best of them and they’ve got nothing better to do than brush the hair out of your sleeping face and admit to every treacherous tender thought that they’ve ever had for or about you

How in the distant future, after swords have been sheathed and the call to adventure is just a faint hum in the wind, how if they were to ever build a life with someone - and prior to Dressrosa they never thought they would need to - you would be the man Law wanted to grow old with

Zoro

Contrary to popular belief and, well, how he looks (like a toxic male gum rat), Zoro has absolutely zero qualms with saying “I love you” to the people he cares about in his life, only cowards are afraid of emotion, after all

There’s no squirming or (warranted) uncertainty like with Law - just the firm, self-assured statement that he loves you and wants you to know that; frankly you’re a little taken aback and how easily he says it but maybe you shouldn’t be, considering just how affectionate his captain is with him and the rest of the crew

If you weren’t a Strawhat already well shucks, you’re an honorary one now because Zoro cares about you and Luffy loves you too!

You eat with him, you nap together, you train parallel to one another, your routines intertwine sooner than either of you realize and you both pick up habits around each other - the first thing you notice is that erratic sleeping schedule of his

It takes more time than you’d like to admit and an offhanded comment from Brook for the realization to dawn on you that Zoro stays up all night to protect his crew, his nakama; a little longer into your relationship when Zoro tells you about Kuina and the promise Wado holds, how she died in the night, you no longer tease your boyfriend about being able to fall asleep anywhere 

It’s not all bad though, having him nap during the day, you get to chat with Usopp or Franky while Zoro’s head dozes comfortably in your lap, unable to resist slumber especially when your fingers scratch through that layer of moss on his head just right and he pretty much only wakes up if there’s a loud enough explosion (on a good day with the Strawhats, there's one)

Bathing is a battle hard-won when it comes to Zoro, although with a few tips from the resident love-cook, you manage to get him in that bath at least more than once a week; nothing like the incentive of you being there too to sweeten the pot, right?

You coax him in with kisses, touches on his arm, then peel the hazardous material his clothes have become after a week on the ocean battling god knows what the seas throw at them 

From there you’re able to get him into a little bit of a routine; lure Zoro into the bathroom with promises of a “reward”, get handsy while you let him soap you down and vice versa, then soak in the tub after until Nami bangs on the door yelling at the both of you to quit using up the hot water

It’s a nice little system, and plus, hearing Zoro open up a little about his week in the same, raspy voice you get from him post-fuck in the tub with nothing between you is something you could very much get used to

#cebwrites #one piece #one piece x reader #trafalgar law #trafalgar law x reader #op law #one piece trafalgar law #law x reader #they/he trafalgar law #law x male reader #zoro #roronoa zoro #op zoro #zoro x reader #zoro x male reader #one piece fluff

[sexiestpodcastcharacter]

Sexiest Podcast Character — Unscripted Bracket — Finals

Propaganda

Glenn Close (Dungeons & Daddies):

#Propaganda for Glenn Close: one of the other PCs mentions multiple times how hot he is #Actually several characters point it out but especially Henry #Also the only person in a podcast that has to put a disclaimer about not being a BDSM podcast to have had sex during the course of the show

Young hot rocker dilf

Loyal to his dead wife <3

Does in fact smoke weed

BARD!! HES A BARD. HE WAS LEAD GUITAR IN HIS BAND (that he was kicked out of)

His band was a Christmas cover band btw.

Literally the fandom had hot Glenn summer which consisted of drawing him being incredibly hot and sexy

Anti government (ofc)

Kind of cringefail (Disney adult) (was on dilfs of disneyland)

Young and sexy not your style? Then how about HIM AFTER YEARS LOCKED IN A TIME PRISON WITH A DAMN HANNIBAL MASK ??

Lost an eye and wears a fucking eyepatch

One incredibly buff arm

Has a pet rat named after his son <3

Immeasurable amounts of trauma in this man- becomes progressively more unhinged

OH OLD HUMAN BARD ISNT CUTTING IT? FINE

HE BECOMES A FUCKING DEMON

A COOL HOT ONE-EYED DEMON WHO WANTS TO KILL HIS DAD (also sexy)

HE CANONICALLY ENDS CHRISTIAN HELL VIA CHRISTMAS

IS ALSO WAY OVERLEVELED

Becomes a demon hunter for the rest of his existence

Also nonwhite !!! We are done with cringefail whiteboys !!!!!!!!!

I can’t put into words ok just know he is the best plz love him.

Okay but Glenn made a minivan cum by talking to her so

HE HAS A BOOK THAT HE MARKS X’S AND CHECKS FOR EVERY DAY TO SEE IF THAT DAY WAS A SUCCESS OR NOT. TO SEE IF HE DID GOOD THAT DAY. ITS ALMOST ENTIRELY X’S. HE WAS CUCKED OUT OF A SON. AND A DEAD WIFE. HE DIDN’T EVEN GET TO KILL HIS DAD IN REVENGE. There’s absolutely nothing going for him except his sex appeal in his life. Nobody he loved remembers him. He lost his eye. All he has is a pet rat and friends who admit they don’t really like him that much. He was kicked out of his own band. The band was named after him. He was kicked out of the Glenn Close trio. All he could do was deez nuts the big bad and be sexy. If nothing else, then pity him. Look in his eyes. Look at his heart and soul. He did not do the BDSM episode for this I’ll tell you what. Do this for my his sake. Do it for Nick Jr, who needs the prize money to pay for his rat snacks. Do it for his son. For Morgan. Ganbatte.

Glenn is the goofiest sexiest character there is and I will die on this hill! I will ride into battle for him! what Dndads created is truly unique and Glenn is a key part of that and for that he deserves to win. I said it before and I'll say it again - GLENN SWEEEEEP

Can we talk about how he says ‘baby’ casually? Like he just calls people that?? That’s HOT. THAT IS HOT!! He’s also bilingual and knows Japanese!!!! He’s a big dumb idiot with a lot of charisma!!!!!! HE WORKED AT A BDSM PLACE FOR TWO SEPARATE ONE SHOTS. HES SO SAD BUT PLAYS IT OFF LIKE HE’S CHILL ALL THE TIME!! HE DOESN’T THINK OF HIMSELF AS SINGLE BECAUSE HE DIDN’T DIVORCE HIS DEAD WIFE!!! He’s like.. the perfect guy. We need this win.

I’d also like to add the fact I made this. Which is the first 11 episodes edited to (almost) only have Glenn in them <3 which is a level of insanity I hope to reiterate. These took hours to make. I wouldn’t do that for anyone else.

vote Glenn I am asking with the biggest saddest eyes possible 🥺🥺🥺 he is so sexy it's pathetic and also so pathetic it's sexy, no I can not possibly adequately elaborate just trust me

Mod Note: While I will still take "bad dads are sexy" propaganda and "bad dads aren't sexy" anti-propaganda, I kindly request no more discussion on whether or not he was a bad father. This is a sexypoll, not a parentingpoll. If you see a post you strongly disagree with, you can just not reblog it.

Mod Note 2: This tournament is about fictional podcast characters. Please do not vote for the real actress Glenn Close.

Gable (Campaign: Skyjacks):

7ft tall silver-haired thembo of a fallen angel. was the literal sword of god until they killed him! reasons slightly unclear but probably sure to forbidden queer love! super caring for their friends. has one friend they have known for hundreds of years who they HATE but are bound to by the red string of fate. their sword is a part of them, they can sheathe it into a tattoo. they start out indistinct at the edges but as they have continued on through the campaign they have become more and more distinct. they became a flaming engine of justice to kill their friends shitheaded older brother who was following him. they have learned enough necromancy to allow other fallen angels to die, even though they typically cannot. they fly giant birds in to battle.

7ft tall beefcake wielding a sword as tall as they are. vengeful sweetheart

Imagine now: a fallen angel with beautiful gray hair and very big muscles. Now imagine them with a 9 ft sword. Now imagine them as a helmsperson of a pirate ship in a flowy deep-v pirate shirt. Now imagine they're dumb as a fucking rock. And finally, imagine that they killed god. Here, you have made Gable Skyjacks: sexiest podcast character of all time.

7ft tall nonbinary/genderfluid thembo fallen angel sky pirate who wields a buster sword. silvergrey hair with black/gold streaks as they regain feathers/memories of before their fall. back is covered in tattoos that hide the scars of their shredded off wings. killed God. toxic exes with lucifer. they are the keeper of several giant war birds who occasionally crave human flesh. they enjoy getting rowdy/smoking rope with their boys. they collect rocks that they think are neat. When anyone admits they are attracted to them, Gable trips over their words and absolutely swaglessly ends up sounding stupider and sexier by the end of the conversation; the will they/won't they and teasing they dish out to these (un?)lucky few is palpable. Sometimes the buster sword is on fire. They are immortal, they are cringe, they are trying to atone because they believe they are the reason the world is ruined.

Okay so aside from all of the above (giant with a matching giant flaming sword, killed god, extreme dumbass), here's some more propaganda for Gable the Godkiller.

They've escaped death multiple times with their partner in... crime? Like literally they were about to be executed in the most brutal way possible and just. Escaped and killed all their captors in the snowy wastelands.

They are the helmsperson of the Uhuru and take this job very seriously and definitely haven't left it to Bowser (you know, like from Mario) multiple times. Can steer that flying ship in horrible weather and still make it to port safely.

Healed an entire fucking hospital by cutting their hair for someone they had the hots for who was also in the hospital. Imagine being on that level of myth making in some random port city because of a hair cut.

Giant bird caretaker and also took the giant birds out on their friend's bachelor party (this was like. his Xth polyamorous marriage at this point btw) and had a fucking blast getting high on some rope and fucking around. They've also flown these birds into combat and looked cool as hell doing it (see: killing their friend's shithead of an older brother in a joust).

Had a relationship with Lucifer the Morning Star before they fell as an angel and killed God. Literally the reason the stars fell was their love for each other. The world would not look the same without Gable and they are, at the very least indirectly responsible for the creation of the Church of the Slain God and everything it represents (fantasy Catholicism).

And also yeah they are regularly tripping over themself and saying very silly things. 10/10 character we love Liz Anderson and Gable in this house

I am seeing people say that this Nicky fellow is basically trans! That's very cool! Gable is actually trans. Pronouns they/them/any presentation whatever they feel like.

Gable held a bachelor party for a BFF where the attendees hunted from their sky birds, wore dresses, and still managed to keep their eyeliner on point!

Gable killed God because he wouldn't let them be queer. They should rightfully crush anyone in their path.

We are finally going up against a character I know. I can confidently say all sexy moments with Gable are much sexier than TAZ's largely off-screen romances. Mod Note: This was written during the poll versus Killian Fangbattle.

But seriously. Listen to Gable's most recent introduction. Unparalleled sexy thembo introduction! Context: The Captain's Council is at a magical tattoo/piercing parlor (which has a lengthy form and disclosure process), trying to stay below the radar, and the Captain and Jonnit are pretending to be father/son to keep up the ruse. And to let Jonnit get a tattoo, since he's technically sort of underage. Bonus: Gable's decision at the tattoo/piercing parlor and noping out of Orimar and Jonnit's acting. (You should check out the full episode! Episode 197 starts a new arc and a good point to step into the series!)

Nicky Close (Dungeons & Daddies):

One armed half-demon man with a sword (also a Dedicated, Involved, Loving Father). (Specifically campaign 2, where he is an adult)

Transmasc bisexual (or at least so widely accepted as such it's basically canon) dilf half-demon let's start with the basics

And by half-demon I mean the literal prince of Hell

But also simultaneously is Saint Nicolas get you a man who can do both specifically this man

Missing an arm cause his ex-friends tragically betrayed him and shot it off but he doesn't need two arms to show you a good time wink wink ;)

The betrayal in question forced him to be seperated from his also hot milf voice actress wife and their son which is sad but in like a way that makes him sexier

Uses his one hand to wield a flaming katana that he used to rescue his son from the FBI

Protects his family with his life very literally which is hot as hell

Big himbo energy couldn't come up with a good plan if he used 100% of his brain

When he does fail at things it's pretty cute honestly

Definitely played a variety of musical instruments before the whole arm thing happened! Maybe he still does idk he's a sexy mystery

2 in 1 deal! This man was born from the merging of two timelines! Kinda sick!!! Also two dads = twice the daddy issues

You'd think the whole being forcibly split from his family thing would mean he isn't very close with his son but nope! His son adores him! They get along great!!!

His mom is simultaneously alive and dead

His mom bagged fucking two different dudes (one of whom FOUND HER DEAD in a different timeline, both of which are demons)

HIS MOMS NAME IS MORGAN FREEMAN, HIS DAD’S NAME IS GLENN CLOSE, AND HIS OTHER DAD’S NAME IS JODIE FOSTER, AND HIS GREAT SOMETHING GRANDFATHER’S NAME IS MERYL STREEP

HIS SONS NAME IS TAYLOR SWIFT

Lifelong pot smoker 👍 (plus drug flower user!!)

CANONICALLY BOTH A POLO WEARER (and yes, has all the stereotypes of that attached with it — a nerd, which is hot) AND A LEATHER JACKET WEARER (which also has all the stereotypes attached with it — a rebel dude person, which is also hot) [<- all widely accepted as canon by the fandom even as he’s older]

A part of the SECOND BIGGEST ship of season two, (Nark) despite the two characters only having one-two canon interactions (one of which JUST happened last episode)

Man’s a himbo what’s hotter than that

So many fucking names. You try to tag him in anything and he takes up half the space. That’s probably hot. For someone out there

This was already mentioned but so very very trans. Like. It’s basically canon

Rock and roll(er)

Joined a group of thieves called the watermice when he was like 13

for a few minutes had a guitar called the Battle Axe of Hatred

definitely had an frienimies with benefits relationship with his childhood friend Lark (sorry ppl that don’t ship nark lol) (it’s canon after ep 44 hah)

Nicky also acts like his sons Pokémon! Taylor tells his dad to do things, and Nicky does it without thinking about anything else he could do!

I feel like the audio of the entire Nick-breaking-into-the-FBI scene should be propaganda, but I'm copying select bits from the transcript:

Anthony: Yeah, it kind of echoes up through the vent, like the beginning of Metal Gear Solid. You hear a voice that strikes you as ever so slightly familiar, Taylor. Saying—  ??: [a deep voice] [echoing in the vent] Where is he?  Anthony: You hear—  Will: Uh-oh, he’s hot.  Anthony: —a bunch of shouting voices.  [giggles]  Beth: Uh-oh! Anthony: You hear a bunch of shouting voices and people shouting for him to get down on the ground to turn off his flame. To fucking get his hands behind his back. You hear this rhythmic stepping forward— because his footsteps don't sound like anybody else's because it's almost like… y’know when you toss a little bit of water onto a really hot pan and it just sizzles like that? It's like every footstep he's taking, you can hear that— Freddie: Cool  Anthony: — and you can feel some of that heat coming up in this vent, even though you can't see him at this point. And he goes—  ??: [echoing] Where. Is. My. Boy? Anthony: You hear the FBI agent—the FBI in quotation marks agent—in the back going like—  Agent: [echoing] He's safe for now. If you want to go ahead and make sure that he stays that way, you feel free to go ahead and step inside the suite that we've prepared for you, my boy. Anthony: And you hear the hot guy voice saying—  [chuckles]  The Hot Guy: [echoing] I don't think that's going to happen.

...

[a powerful rush of air builds] Anthony: You hear—  [gunfire, and the air rush culminates in a burst of flame; from underneath the fire, metal music starts playing] Anthony: —plumes of flame exploding.  [a person’s pained shout, gunfire and bursts of flame continue]  Anthony: You can feel the heat radiating through this metal vent and it's actually beginning to hurt and burn your hands.

...

Anthony: And you hear blood—  [sizzling]  Anthony: —hitting the fucking ground and you hear sizzling and things boiling and burning. Taylor: That could just be coffee! That could just be coffee. Link, let's go. Anthony: And you are getting closer and closer to the elevator. And you hear that same hot voice say—  The Hot Guy: [echoing] Where the hell is Taylor?

Gable and Nicky Together:

We are on a joint ticket now! This is a truly unbeatable combo. Not even god can nerf it because Gable killed him. Vote for us. Nicky Close will watch your stuff and play with your cats while Gable gives you the night of your life.

Gable and Nicky can literally be yuor angle or ur bevil.

Art of Gable and Nicky from @slightlyhopefulromantic.

#Round 6 #Glenn Close #Glenn Close DnDads #Gable #Gable Skyjacks #Nicky Close #Campaign #Campaign Podcast #Campaign: Skyjacks #Skyjacks #Dungeons & Daddies #Dungeons and Daddies