Tumgik
#if I had to the follow through I would write it myself
maxsimagination · 2 days
Note
would you write more for kim little please? maybe her dating someone younger on the team and the rest of the girls find out? <3
𝙟𝙪𝙨𝙩 𝙖 𝙗𝙖𝙗𝙮 - 𝙠.𝙡𝙞𝙩𝙩𝙡𝙚
Tumblr media
warnings: none, just an age gap
-------
“kimmyyyy, no i wanna sleep in. pleaseeee.”
i groaned as kim pulled the curtains to our shared apartment. i wanted to enjoy the last moments with her until we had to go to training and pretend we weren’t dating.
it wasn’t because we didn’t think they’d accept us, it was more because kim was 33 and i was only 22.
the team might not think that was bad, but if they knew then it was only a matter of time before the media knew, and it would blow up indefinitely once they knew. we just weren’t willing to risk it right now.
i ended up being dragged out of bed by kim, the scot managing to haul me to the bathroom. i was half asleep but went through my morning routine like clockwork.
we rocked up at the training fields within the next hour, but kim walked in first. we drove there in the same car but walked in separately so people didn’t suspect anything.
“yn!”
“leah!”
i greeted the blonde when i walked in, levelling her excitement with my own. she jumped onto me in a hug, before slipping back onto the floor.
we walked into the dining hall where the rest of the team and staff were, picking up our designated plates and electing to sit at katie’s table. which also happened to have kim at it.
i, obviously, chose to sit next to kim but thankfully no one picked up on that.
we were allocated an hour to eat breakfast before everyone had to actually start working for the day. all the players filed out to the changing rooms where we changed into our boots, and i slipped my hoodie off while i had the chance.
i caught kim’s gaze as i jogged out to meet leah, throwing a cheeky grin at her expression.
leah was up with katie and cait, talking about god knows what. i joined in, but then jonas cut everyone’s conversations short with his yell for attention.
“girls! let’s get started please. we’re doing a jogging warmup lap, then weights.
find a partner once you’ve finished the lap, use each other for spotting. we don’t need any injuries.”
there was collective murmurs of agreement, and we started jogging around the field. i naturally found myself jogging next to kim, as if a magnet pulled us together.
“gym partners?”
i questioned, she nodded.
we made our way to the weights section of the gym arsenal had.
“we are so doing legs first.”
i all but dragged kim over to the leg press to kickstart our session. kim did not want to do legs, she was into training arms, which was very visible from the bicep muscles that she sported.
one of the many things i drooled over.
i had shoved at least 250lbs onto the leg press machine and watched as kim’s eyes bulge at the amount of plates.
“you’re telling me you can safely lift that?”
“nope. but i’m gonna.”
i ended up doing two reps of fifteen, before upping the weight to 300lbs. kim may have had an aneurysm at the amount of weight i was pushing, and making it look like it was nothing. but she still stood behind me, watching, spotting, and dancing her fingertips over my shoulder blades.
it gave me tingles, and was slightly ticklish. what we didn’t know was that leah was looking from across the room, and she knew that something was up.
when the gym session was over and we started actual drills, leah was quick to pin me as her partner for anything. i thought it was weird but didn’t question it.
when we had a break leah took my hand and walked past kim, beckoning her to follow us. leah walked us away from the groups of girls, so we were out of earshot.
“there’s something going on between you two. spill.”
both of us were quick to sputter out some form of excuse.
“no, what do you mean.”
“don’t know what you’re talking about, lee.”
leah gave us both one of her stares.
“cut the crap. i see the way you look at each other, the little touches. not to mention you both come into practice witching minutes of each other, every morning.”
i exchanged a look with kim, there was no point in hiding this from leah. she was like the fbi, she knew everything.
“okay. we’re dating. we have been for a year.”
something settled in leah’s expression, now she knew what was going on.
“i knew it.
kimmy, going for the young ones are we?”
leah poked at kim’s side, grinning at the skipper. there was an eleven year gap between us, hence why we had kept it secret for a while.
“shut it, lee. do we need to tell the whole team?”
“it would make things easier. for you that is. but only if you want.”
i look over at kim. she looks over at me. i shrug, i never had a problem with telling everyone, kim was the logic one who knew the ins and outs of the media.
“fuck it why not. they’ll figure out eventually.”
“we don’t have to say anything, we can just walk out there and start acting like a couple. see how long it takes them.”
i throw out the idea with a grin. why not have a little fun with it.
we end up agreeing on my idea. training still had a couple of hours left and jonas gave us a few more drills to do, so me and kim forgot all about keeping the secret and just had fun training with each other for once.
surprisingly, none of the girls, not even the staff, said anything. not even kyra or alessia, of all people.
you’d think that the two most gossipy youngsters on the team would say something. but by the end of training, no one was any wiser. so leah told them all.
kyra let out a very loud, ‘oh my god!’ which caught the attention of alessia, who told lotte, so on and so on. soon the whole team knew and it was like a weight was lifted off our shoulders.
“kimmy, i didn’t know you were into the young ones.”
katie’s irish accent was unmistakable as she caught up with us to poke fun at the skipper. cait walked alongside me, she didn’t tease neither me nor kim, simply said she was happy for us.
you could tell she was true with her words, she was in a very similar situation, when her and katie first got together.
“a proper cougar then, our skipper.”
lotte and alessia laughed as they walked past.
it was funny, all the jokes they threw around, but most of all i was happy that they accepted us.
396 notes · View notes
Text
Tumblr media
The Alchemy
AU where Harry is the star quarterback at his college and y/n is an English major.
Based very loosely off The Alchemy by Taylor Swift
CW: Smut
Word Count: 6,871
Leaving my family to go to University was a bittersweet decision. My heart tugged at the thought of being away from them, but my passion for mastering the art of English pulled me towards my dream. My family had always been my biggest supporters and I wanted to make them proud by becoming an English professor. This meant leaving behind my comfortable life in a small suburban town in Florida to study abroad at one of the most prestigious universities. The campus was nestled in the very heart of where literary greats had once roamed and created their masterpieces. It was as if the walls exuded inspiration and creativity, urging me to chase after my dreams with even more fervor. Though I missed my family dearly, I knew that this journey would lead me to become the best version of myself and honor their unwavering support and love.
It was a whirlwind of experiences as I made my way through the unfamiliar streets. The currency conversion was a constant challenge, with every transaction feeling like a game of guesswork. And then there was the driving - on the opposite side of the road no less - which required all of my concentration to avoid any mishaps. But perhaps most daunting of all was the non-stop partying at pubs, a culture shock for someone like me who had grown up in a small town in America.
Thankfully, I was able to find a flat that was within walking distance from the school, and even luckier to have another American girl as my roommate. Mia was a sweet, bubbly girl from the middle of nowhere Kansas, embracing every aspect of British culture including the pub scene and the charming local lads.
Living with Mia meant constantly having people over, and it seemed like every night brought new faces into our home. I didn't mind too much, mostly enjoying the lively atmosphere and meeting new people. However, there were definitely some moments that tested my patience, like when one of Mia's friends named Arthur ended up getting sick and leaving his mark in our kitchen. Despite these occasional hiccups, I was grateful for this experience abroad and all the unique encounters it brought my way.
Though Mia's social butterfly nature could be trying at times, I appreciated her warm companionship in this foreign place. It was on one such night, after we had cleaned up the remnants of Arthur's ill-fated escapades, that we found ourselves cozied up with mugs of tea and watching the rain patter against the windows. 
Mia was unusually pensive as she stared out into the drizzly Manchester night. "You know," she began softly, "sometimes I wonder if I'm chasing the wrong dreams. My parents wanted me to become a doctor or lawyer, something stereotypically successful, but I just wanted adventure. Now here I am, living it up in England, but it all feels...empty, like I'm still searching for meaning."
I nodded thoughtfully, sensing the vulnerability in her words. Though Mia put on a bubbly facade, there was more depth to her than met the eye. 
"I think the great thing about being here is that we have time to figure it all out," I offered gently. "We're writing our own stories, not just following someone else's script." 
Mia smiled, some of the spark returning to her eyes. "You're right. That's exactly why I love being here with you."
As the rain continued to drum against the windows, Mia and I sat in comfortable silence for a moment, each lost in our own thoughts. Finally, Mia turned to me with a curious expression.
"Do you ever have doubts about your dreams, too?" Mia asked, her voice tinged with vulnerability.
I considered her question for a moment before responding, "All the time. Sometimes I wonder if I'm on the right path or if I'm just going through the motions."
Mia nodded understandingly, her eyes reflecting the shimmer of uncertainty. "It's scary, isn't it? The idea that we might wake up one day and realize we've been chasing a dream all along."
I placed a comforting hand on Mia's shoulder. "It is scary, but it's also part of the journey. We're allowed to question and evolve along the way."
She smiled weakly, her gaze drifting back to the rain-splattered window. "I guess that's what makes life interesting, right? The uncertainty of it all."
Our conversation was interrupted by a sudden knock on the door. Mia got up to answer it, revealing a group of our friends who had decided to brave the rainy night for an impromptu gathering.
"Come in, come in!" Mia exclaimed cheerfully, ushering everyone inside. The room quickly filled with laughter and chatter as our friends settled in.
As I looked around the group, my eyes landed on a few familiar faces who have crossed paths with me several times before. Among them was Arthur, a friendly face that always brought a sense of comfort and familiarity. As everyone piled into the room, my gaze wandered to him - Harry Styles, the renowned quarterback of our school's football team. I couldn't help but feel a tinge of excitement at being in the presence of such a well-known athlete. When I first arrived from the United States, I had assumed the term "football" referred to what we call soccer back home. But as I soon discovered, American Football was just as beloved and popular in the UK.
Harry noticed me looking his way and met my gaze. There was an intensity in his green eyes that made me quickly avert my own, focusing instead on my friend Grace who was animatedly sharing a story next to me. 
I tried to tune into her words, but my thoughts kept drifting back to the handsome footballer across the room. By all accounts, Harry was cocky, brash, and a bit of a player. And yet, I couldn't deny there was something magnetic about him. He carried himself with a self-assured swagger, his athletic frame filling out his clothes in a way that betrayed his strength. 
I scolded myself internally. Just because he's nice to look at doesn't change the fact that he seems like an arrogant jock. Still, when our eyes met again, I felt a flutter in my stomach I couldn't ignore. 
Harry said something to his friend that made the group erupt into laughter. He flashed a crooked smile, his eyes crinkling at the corners. I quickly looked away once more, but the image of his smile lingered in my mind.
Get it together, I told myself sternly. Harry is off-limits. With his reputation, getting involved would only lead to trouble. I turned my focus back to Grace, pushing all thoughts of Harry's eyes, smile and broad shoulders out of my head. 
For the rest of the night, I avoided looking in Harry's direction, though I could feel his gaze on me periodically as the hours wore on. By the time people started trickling out, I felt certain I had avoided any direct interaction with the dashing footballer. 
That is, until I went to lock the door behind the last guest and found him standing there. He flashed that crooked smile again as he leaned against the door frame. "See you around, Y/N," he said, holding my gaze for a moment before disappearing into the night. I stood frozen, my heart racing as I replayed those five simple words in my head.
As I stood there in shock at Harry's unexpected presence, I couldn't help but feel a mix of emotions swirling inside me. His parting words echoed in my mind, leaving me slightly breathless and unsure of what to make of the situation. Gathering my composure, I locked the door behind him and turned to find Mia watching me with a knowing smile.
"Looks like someone caught your eye, Y/N," Mia teased, nudging me playfully. "Harry Styles, huh? Quite the charmer."
I flushed slightly at her comment, trying to brush off any implications. "Oh, come on, Mia. It's not like that," I deflected, hoping to downplay the significance of the moment.
But Mia wasn't convinced. "Sure, sure," she replied with a wink. "Just remember, not all that glitters is gold."
Her words lingered in my mind as I bid her goodnight and retreated to my room. Sitting on my bed, I couldn't shake off the image of Harry's smile or the way he had looked at me in that brief moment by the door. The conflicting thoughts swirled in my head, leaving me restless and contemplative.
The following day at school, as I made my way through the bustling halls, I noticed a familiar figure leaning against the lockers up ahead. It was Harry, his usual confident demeanor on full display as he chatted with his friends. As our eyes met briefly, he flashed a grin in my direction before turning back to his conversation.
Feeling a surge of boldness, I approached him tentatively. "Hey, Harry," I greeted him, trying to keep my tone casual despite the flutter in my stomach.
"Hey there, Y/N," he responded with a smirk, his green eyes twinkling mischievously. "Didn't think you'd show up here again so soon."
I felt my cheeks flush at his words. Clearly he was referring to my abrupt exit last night after our brief encounter at the door. I scrambled to think of a clever response. 
"Well, we do go to the same school," I pointed out, trying to keep my voice light despite the nerves I felt. 
Harry chuckled, crossing his arms over his broad chest as he regarded me with amusement. 
"True enough," he conceded. "But I got the sense you were trying to avoid me last night. Did I make you nervous?"
His bluntness took me aback. I opened my mouth to respond, but no words came out. Harry's eyes danced with mirth at my flustered state. 
"Cat got your tongue?" He teased. 
I took a steadying breath, determined not to let him get the best of me. "You wish," I retorted, hoping the bravado in my voice sounded more convincing than I felt. 
Harry laughed, a rich warm sound that made my knees weak. Our eyes locked and in that moment, it was like the noisy hallway melted away and there was only the two of us.
"Feisty. I like it," he murmured. Before I could respond, the warning bell rang, snapping us both back to reality. 
"See you around, Y/N," Harry said with a wink before disappearing into the swarm of students heading to class. 
My body froze in place, heart thudding against my ribs as I gazed at the infamous Harry. He exuded an undeniable air of trouble, and yet, as our charged banter replayed in my mind, I couldn't deny the adrenaline pumping through my veins. With a determined stride, I made my way to class, refusing to let this boy be the cause of my tardiness.
I took a seat in my Studies of Shakespeare class, the one subject I truly loved. The works of William Shakespeare never failed to captivate me, and if you could understand the Elizabethan lingo, his witty humor shone through brilliantly. Unfortunately, this particular teacher seemed to have a talent for draining all the life and humor out of these masterpieces.
I tried to focus as the professor droned on about the themes in Romeo and Juliet, but my mind kept wandering back to my encounter with Harry. Something about our charged banter had awakened feelings in me that I didn't quite understand. 
Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed a folded piece of paper land on my desk as if taken out of a scene from a movie. I looked around furtively before opening it. In an unfamiliar scrawling handwriting it read:
"What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet is the sun." - H
I felt a thrill run through me and quickly tucked the note into my bag before the professor could notice. So Harry was in this class too? I scanned the room subtly until I spotted him a few rows behind me. He caught my eye and gave me a roguish wink.
I turned back to the front, trying to ignore the simmering exhilaration I felt. Over the next few days, the notes kept coming during Shakespeare class, each with a quote or two from the Bard himself. They were usually cheeky and flirtatious, hinting at some blossoming rapport between us.
I found myself anticipating each one, my heart skipping a beat when I would spot a new folded note on my desk. Our eyes would meet across the room, a hidden smile just between us.
After class one day, as I gathered my things, I sensed Harry approach my desk. "So when's our study session?" he asked nonchalantly, though there was a glint of something more in his eyes. I hesitated, knowing I should keep my distance, yet unable to deny I was intrigued.
I nervously tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear, trying to appear nonchalant. "Well, I don't know... I've heard you're not the most dedicated studier," I teased, giving him a playful smile.
Harry chuckled, his eyes sparkling mischievously. "Oh, but that's where you're wrong. I may not look like it, but I'm quite the Shakespeare aficionado," he replied with a grin.
I raised an eyebrow in skepticism. "Is that so? Well, I suppose we could arrange a study session... if you can prove your expertise," I challenged, a hint of challenge in my tone.
His grin widened, accepting the challenge. "Consider it done. How about we meet at the library tomorrow after school?" Harry suggested, his gaze unwavering.
I hesitated for a moment, the thrill of anticipation coursing through me. "Alright, it's a date then," I agreed, feeling a rush of excitement at the prospect of spending more time with him.
As the final bell rang, signaling the end of the school day, Harry flashed me one last grin before disappearing into the bustling hallway. My heart raced with both nervousness and exhilaration as I packed up my belongings, eager for our upcoming study session.
The following day at the library, I found myself anxiously scanning the room for Harry. My pulse quickened when I spotted him sitting at a table in the corner, a stack of Shakespearean plays spread out in front of him.
I made my way over to him, feeling a mix of nerves and excitement swirling inside me. "Ready to impress me with your Shakespeare knowledge?" I asked with a teasing smile as I took a seat across from him.
Harry flashed me a charming grin. "Just watch and learn," he said confidently, picking up a copy of Romeo and Juliet and flipping to a random page.
As he began to recite lines from the play with passion and flair, I couldn't help but be captivated by his enthusiasm. His eyes lit up as he delved into each line, bringing the centuries-old words to life in a way that was both mesmerizing and captivating.
By the time our study session ended, I found myself completely enthralled by Harry's interpretation of Shakespeare's works. As we gathered our things to leave, he turned to me with a twinkle in his eye, he knew a lot more about the works than he let on to.
Harry turned to me, “So now that I’ve shown you i’m smart, I know Shakespeare, when are you coming to one of my games?” he asked confidently.
I was taken aback by his forward invitation. Attending one of his football games felt intimate in a way that made me nervous. 
"Oh, um, I don't know..." I fumbled over my words, suddenly feeling shy. 
Harry tilted his head, giving me a crooked smile. "Come on, it'll be fun. I'll even give you a personal tour of the field afterwards," he joked. 
I bit my lip, considering it. There was no denying I felt drawn to him, despite trying to keep my distance. And the thought of seeing him command the field sent a little thrill through me. 
"Alright, I suppose I could stop by," I finally conceded, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear self-consciously. 
Harry's face lit up. "Brilliant! Our next game is on Friday. I'll leave a ticket for you at will call," he said eagerly.
I nodded, butterflies taking flight in my stomach. "Okay, yeah. I’ll see you then," I replied softly. 
Harry gave me a dazzling smile and I felt my knees go weak.
Friday night arrived and I found myself filled with nervous excitement as I made my way to the football stadium. I couldn't believe I had actually agreed to come watch Harry play. As I approached the ticket booth, I gave my name and they handed me the ticket Harry had left for me. 
I found my seat in the packed bleachers and waited anxiously for the game to start. When the players rushed onto the field, I immediately spotted Harry's mop of curly hair. He looked focused and determined as he took his position on the field. 
As the game began, I was immediately drawn in by Harry's commanding presence on the field. His movements were fluid and precise, each pass and dodge executed with passion and skill. With each successful play, the crowd erupted into thunderous cheers, mirroring my own excitement. It was impossible not to join in, jumping to my feet and cheering for Harry along with everyone else.
At halftime, Harry made his way over to the sidelines, sweat glistening on his forehead and tattooed arms, his chest heaving from exertion. As he scanned the crowd for familiar faces, his eyes locked onto mine and a wide grin spread across his face. He waved enthusiastically, causing my cheeks to flush as I shyly waved back in return. 
In the second half of the game, Harry's presence seemed to radiate even more brightly. With each touchdown he scored, his fists pumped triumphantly in the air. The crowd roared and cheered as he ripped off his helmet and hoisted it victoriously above his head, his teammates swarming around him in celebration.
As the stadium emptied out, I stayed behind with a swarm of butterflies fluttering in my stomach. I couldn't wait to see Harry once again. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, he emerged from the locker room, his hair still damp from his post-game shower but his eyes shining with joy.
"So, what did you think?" he asked eagerly as he approached me.
"You were truly spectacular out there," I gushed earnestly. A wide grin stretched across Harry's face.
"Come on, let me give you that promised tour," he said playfully, offering me his arm. Laughing, I happily took it and followed him onto the empty field, my heart racing with excitement and admiration for the amazing athlete by my side.
Harry led me onto the empty stadium field, the night air crisp and cool against our skin. He pointed out spots on the grass where pivotal plays had happened, describing them with a passion that revealed his deep love for the game. 
I found myself enthralled, leaning into him as we walked, his arm solid and warm beneath my hand. When we reached the middle of the field, he turned to face me. His eyes were soft, searching my face in the dim glow of the stadium lights. 
"You know, I was afraid you wouldn't come tonight," he admitted quietly. 
I tilted my head. "Why's that?"
He shrugged, a small smile playing on his lips. "You never seemed to like me much before. I figured I wasn't your type."
Heat rose to my cheeks. He wasn't wrong - I'd unfairly judged him as arrogant and cocky. But tonight had shattered those assumptions. 
"I guess I realized there's more to you than meets the eye," I said softly. 
Harry's smile widened. He lifted his hand, gently tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. My breath caught at his touch. Slowly, he leaned in. I let my eyes fall shut in anticipation...
But suddenly, the stadium lights flickered off, plunging us into darkness. We jumped apart in surprise. 
Harry laughed. "Guess that's our cue to head out." 
He took my hand, interlacing our fingers, and led me towards the parking lot. I walked close beside him, hyper-aware of his palm pressed against mine.
As he towered over me, Harry's eyes scanned the street, searching for a car. "Where did you park?" he asked, his voice deep and smooth.
I shifted nervously on my feet, avoiding eye contact. "Oh. Uh. I didn't drive. I just live around the street," I murmured, my cheeks flushing with embarrassment. The thought of navigating English roads was terrifying to me.
A warm chuckle escaped from Harry's lips as he looked back down at me. "I can drive you home, love," he offered, extending a hand towards me. His scent wafted towards me - a mix of cologne and something woodsy - and I couldn't help but feel a flutter in my stomach at his closeness.
As Harry and I walked towards his car, our hands still entwined, I felt a sense of excitement and anticipation build within me. "So, tell me more about this amazing game-winning touchdown," I teased, trying to break the silence that had fallen between us.
Harry laughed softly, his eyes sparkling with amusement as he glanced at me sideways. "Oh, you mean the one where I body-slammed the other team's runner into oblivion?" He pretended to flex his muscles playfully. "That was pretty epic, if I do say so myself."
I shook my head, feigning disbelief. "You're such a show-off," I said with a grin. "I bet you were the star of the school playground too."
Harry snorted. "Hardly. I was more of a loner growing up. Spent most of my time with my nose buried in books."
"Really?" I raised an eyebrow in surprise. "And here I thought all jocks were brain-dead."
He laughed again, his laughter echoing through the empty streets as we walked towards his car. When we finally reached it, Harry unlocked the door and gestured for me to get inside. As I slid into the passenger seat, I couldn't help but notice how perfectly he filled the driver's seat - broad shoulders tapering down to narrow hips and long legs. The image of him all sweaty and wet from a shower flashed through my mind, making my cheeks heat up again.
"So," Harry began as he started the engine and pulled out onto the road, his eyes fixed on the road ahead, "tell me more about yourself."
I felt myself blush even harder at his directness but decided to play along. "Well," I said slowly, thinking quickly. "I'm a huge bookworm too - Harry Potter is probably my favorite series ever."
Harry chuckled softly as he glanced at me briefly before looking back at the road. "I can see why you fit right in here in England then."
We drove through the quiet streets in companionable silence for a while before Harry spoke up again. "You know, you don't have to act all tough around me," he said quietly, his eyes still on the road as he slowed down at a stoplight.
I turned to face him fully now, surprised by his words. "I wasn't trying to be tough," I said defensively. "I just didn't want you to think that... well, never mind what I didn't want you to think," I muttered under my breath.
Harry's face softened into a gentle smile as he reached out to brush a strand of hair behind my ear once again - a gesture that sent shivers down my spine despite the warmth of the car interior. "It's okay," he murmured soothingly as he took my hand in his once more and squeezed gently before letting go when the light turned green again.
The rest of our drive was filled with more easy conversation punctuated by moments of awkward silence broken only by the sounds of our breathing and occasional traffic noises outside. When we finally pulled up outside my house I found myself hesitating before opening the car door knowing that this was goodbye.
Under the dim glow of the street lamp, I tentatively turned to face Harry. "Thanks for...for tonight," I stammered out, suddenly self-conscious under his intense gaze. 
His emerald eyes twinkled mysteriously as he simply nodded and began unbuckling his seatbelt. His eyes never left mine, setting off a simmering warmth between us that was hard to ignore. 
"I should probably walk you to your door," he said softly, accentuating each word with an inexplicably seductive lilt. My heart pounded in my chest as we exited the car and made our way towards my apartment.
Once at the front door, we stood facing each other in silence, the air around us thick with unspoken words and desires. I felt his strong fingers gently cradle my chin, tilting my face up to meet his gaze. The intensity of this simple touch sent sparks racing down my spine, pooling heat in places I hadn't even known existed.
"Can I come inside?" His voice was barely a whisper but it echoed loudly in my ears.
My mind screamed caution but my body had other plans. “Yes,” I breathed out, unlocking the door and pulling him inside.
Inside, Harry's lips found mine in a searing kiss that left me breathless. His tongue teased against mine, creating a warm and delicious friction that sent shivers down my legs. As he pressed his hips against me, I could feel the unmistakable hardness growing between us. Our hands roamed freely over each other's bodies, exploring new territory and seeking pleasure through every touch.
Harry's fingers made their way to the waistband of my skirt, pulling it down over my hips and letting it fall to the ground. He lifted me up onto the edge of a nearby table, spreading my legs slightly as he stood between them. The feel of his fingers brushing against my inner thigh caused me to gasp and arch my back in anticipation.
Harry pulled back abruptly,“I’m sorry,” He started, “that was really inappropriate.”
As Harry apologized, his eyes were drawn to the hint of my arousal peeking out from between my legs. His hesitation vanished as his fingers brushed against my wetness once more, this time without pulling away. He groaned in approval and leaned forward, pressing his lips against mine once more. I craved him in the worst ways.
Our tongues tangled as he pushed me back onto the table, spreading my legs further apart. His hands found their way under my shirt, skimming over my stomach before lifting it up, exposing my bra-clad breasts. He took a deep breath, inhaling my scent and trailing his fingers lightly across one tight nipple.
"Harry," I moaned, cavinginto his touch. "Please don't stop."
He smirked wickedly down at me before pulling back slightly. In one swift motion, he yanked my shirt over my head, tossing it aside carelessly. Grabbing hold of both sides of my bra, he pulled it down too with such force that my breasts were freed from their confinement.
I gasped at the sudden rush of air hitting my sensitive nipples but before I could catch my breath, he took one of them into his mouth sucking hard while pinching the other between two fingers, teasing it mercilessly.
"Fuck," I whimpered, clawing at the table underneath me as pleasure coursed through me like lightning. The intense mix of pain and pleasure sent waves of desire crashing over me as I felt myself becoming wetter with every passing second.
Sliding one hand down towards his pants, I slowly undid the button and zipper before slipping my hand inside his boxers to grip him firmly around his growing erection. He groaned into my breast at the contact sending shivers down my spine.
"You want me to fuck you?" he whispered hoarsely against my skin leaving a trail of saliva along my collarbone as he ran his tongue upwards caressingly .
"Yes," I breathed out between parted lips unable to form complete words due to the intensity of emotions running through me. 
My heart raced as his erection throbbed in my hand. I could feel the heat radiating off his skin, mixed with the desire that seemed to emanate from him. His other hand slid down my back, over my ass cheeks, and gripped them roughly, pulling me closer against his hardness.
"Do you have any idea how fucking sexy you are? You and your little shy good girl act" he growled into my neck, nipping at the skin there softly. With one swift movement, he lifted me up onto the countertop, pushing my legs apart with his hips. His mouth trailed kisses along my jawline, down my throat, and on my breasts. 
I arched my back slightly offering myself to him more fully as he took a hungry mouthful of one of my nipples into his mouth sucking on it hard while pinching the other between his fingers causing a sharp intake of breath from me which made him smile devilishly before moving on to devour the other one.
My body trembled with anticipation as he bit my neck playfully, his rough hands sliding over my hips and ass cheeks before pulling me against him. His cock twitched against my wet core, making me whimper in want. "You like that, don't you?" he growled, his voice low and husky. "You're so fucking beautiful."
"Harry," I moaned, my voice reduced to a desperate whimper as he continued teasing me with his words and touches. "Please..."
The sound of skin slapping against skin filled the room, along with our ragged breathing and the occasional moan. I could feel myself getting lost in the sensations, my body responding eagerly to his movements. His hands were everywhere, tracing over my curves and gripping me tightly as he pounded into me.
My own hands were roaming his back, digging into his flesh as I tried to hold on to something amidst the overwhelming pleasure that was coursing through me. Every inch of my body felt on fire, and I couldn't get enough.
"Fuck," he grunted, his face contorting with pleasure. "You feel so good."
I whimpered in response, unable to form any coherent words as he continued to move inside me relentlessly. My whole world had narrowed down to this moment – his body against mine, the sound of our bodies coming together in a perfect rhythm.
My mind was blissfully blank as he increased his pace, his thrusts becoming rougher and more urgent. I could feel my climax building up within me, like a fire threatening to consume me whole.
And then it hit me like a tidal wave – intense and all-consuming. My back arched off the counter as I cried out his name, my body trembling with pleasure as every nerve ending exploded with ecstasy.
He followed soon after, letting out a loud groan as he spilled himself inside me. We stayed still for a moment, trying to catch our breaths and bask in the aftermath of our passion.
But eventually reality came crashing back around us. Panic started creeping up inside me as I tried to gather my thoughts and make sense of what had just happened. 
As I lay there, my heart still pounding in my chest, he gently pulled out of me and straightened up. His eyes, dark with desire just moments ago, now softened with a mixture of tenderness and regret.
"I'm sorry," he whispered, his voice barely audible over the sound of our heavy breathing. "I shouldn't have let things go this far."
I sat up slowly, feeling a mix of emotions swirling inside me – confusion, guilt, and a lingering sense of pleasure that refused to dissipate. 
"It's not just your fault," I murmured, avoiding his gaze as I tried to gather my clothes around me. "I wanted this too."
He reached out a hand to touch my arm, but hesitated before making contact.
"We should talk about this," he said finally, his tone serious. "About what it means for us."
I nodded slowly, feeling the weight of his words settling between us. What had started as a moment of passion had now morphed into something more complicated, something that demanded attention and discussion.
As we dressed in silence, the air in the room felt charged with unspoken thoughts and emotions. The intensity of our physical connection lingered like a ghost between us, refusing to be ignored.
We began to gather our clothes from around the room, now tainted with the evidence of our reckless choices. Harry buried his face into his shirt before pulling it on, perhaps ruminating on what just occurred, or maybe trying to drown out the reality with the lingering scent of his cologne.
"Y/n," he started after a long silence, pulling his trousers up. His voice sounded strained, an indication that he was struggling with the right choice of words. "I... I didn't mean for this to... I mean, I like spending time with you." He sighed heavily, rubbing his face between his large palms.
I remained silent as I fastened my bra. The finality in his voice was suffocating, making it harder for me to breathe with each passing moment. I felt my heart thumping loudly in my chest – a crude reminder of the complication we had willingly dived into.
"I like you, Y/N," he said finally, his voice a hoarse whisper. The words hung in the air between us, hovering like a dense fog, obscuring any clarity that might lie beyond.
I stopped fumbling with my blouse, my fingers stilled by his confession. "Harry," I began, my voice barely audible. Fear clung to me, making my words tremble.
"I know," he cut me off before I could finish what I started. "I know we're both in different places... Me with football and you with your studies." There was a tingling silence after his statement, as if he was waiting for me to confirm or deny his declaration.
I sighed heavily, tugging at the hem of my blouse, feeling the cool fabric against my still heated skin. "It's not that simple Harry," I admitted, blinking back tears that had started to sting my eyes. "This," I motioned around the room, encompassing our discarded underwear strewn haphazardly around the room - a silent testament to the passion that had just consumed us, "this complicates things."
He ran his hand through his tousled hair and nodded solemnly. "I understand," he replied, a hint of resignation etching lines onto his face. His gaze was heavy with something akin to regret as it met mine.
My breath hitched in my throat at the intensity of his stare. I wanted desperately to reach out and ease the burden that seemed to weigh heavily on him. But reality was an insidious shadow that lurked in our midst, reminding us of the impracticality of our desires.
"I think it's better if we keep our distance for now," Harry broke the silence after what felt like an eternity. His words were like cold water dousing the fire that our bodies had kindled only moments ago.
A feeling of sudden emptiness clawed at me. His words, though probably said in goodwill, felt like a punch to my gut. I swallowed hard, fighting back the tears that threatened to spill over.
I nodded, unable to bring myself to utter a word. He stepped towards me and for a moment I thought he would pull me into his arms one last time. But he merely extended a hand that I shook lightly, the gesture felt impersonal after the intimacy we had just shared.
Without another word, he turned and left the room. I stood still in the silence that followed, the sound of his departing footsteps echoing in my ears long after he was gone.
Mia came home later that night, oblivious to the charged atmosphere that still lingered, suffocating and heavy in the air. Her chatter about an extra credit assignment she’d completed was a stark contrast to the silence that had enveloped the room just hours ago. 
“Y/N, are you okay?” she asked suddenly, noticing my distant gaze. I gave her a weak smile in response before excusing myself to bed.
As I lay there in the dark, staring at the ceiling, Harry's words echoed through my mind. "I think it's better if we keep our distance for now." His voice was etched into my memory, roughened by regret and something else I couldn't quite place. His face bore an expression that told me this was as hard for him as it was for me.
The next day was a blur. My classes seemed trivial compared to the turmoil swirling in my mind. My interactions with others were mechanical and flat as if I was watching myself from outside my body.
Football practice was going on when I walked past the field on my way back from the campus library. My eyes instinctively sought out Harry among the sea of players. I found him focused on his game, every muscle in his body straining as he kicked the ball towards the goalpost.
His world seemed unchanged—still revolving around football—while mine felt like it had been knocked off its axis.
The following weeks were no easier. Everywhere I went, I could feel his presence like a phantom pain - a dull ache that refused to fade away. In every conversation, every song playing in the background, every corner of campus - Harry was there.
I knew we had made a rational decision, given our circumstances. But my heart couldn't comprehend what my mind had already accepted.
Months passed and winter set in, blanketing Manchester in white. Serene and beautiful yet so melancholy it mirrored my mood perfectly. The once familiar campus looked different under the soft glow of the snow as if to mirror the change that had occurred in my life.
One evening, as I was walking back from the library, I spotted Harry sitting alone on a bench, bundled up in a thick coat, his breath misting in the frigid air. His eyes were trained on the football field, currently blanketed by snow, and his hands were tucked into his pockets, his usual energy replaced by a pensive quietness.
I hesitated, weighing my options. We hadn't spoken since that night – the night when our worlds collided and then abruptly fell apart. But something drew me towards him – an inexplicable magnetism I had been fighting for so long.
Stepping tentatively closer, I cleared my throat to announce my presence. "Harry," I said softly, trying not to startle him.
He looked up at the sound of my voice, surprise flickering across his features before they settled into guarded neutrality. "Y/N," he responded with a curt nod, but made no move to invite me to sit.
Taking a leap of faith, I lowered myself onto the bench next to him, maintaining some distance while also bracing for the icy cold through my jeans. For several minutes we sat in silence, lost in our own thoughts as we stared out at the snowy field.
"I've missed you." The words slipped out before I could stop them.
He turned toward me then, his emerald eyes soft and searching as they met mine. His lips opened as if to say something but closed again as if reconsidering his words.
"Y/N..." His voice trailed off and there was a long pause before he continued. "I’ve missed you too."
Relief washed over me at his confession but it was quickly replaced with a gnawing sadness as I realized that missing each other wasn’t enough to bridge the gap between us. Our realities were still the same - he was still the star football player with ambitions bigger than Manchester itself and I was still an English major trying to carve out a place for myself in academia.
“Do you ever think about…?” I started, swallowing hard as I tried to voice the question that had been eating at me.
“Us?” He completed my sentence, his voice barely above a whisper. His gaze was heavy but he held it steady, openly showing the vulnerability he usually kept hidden beneath his star athlete facade. “All the time.”
The honesty in his confession hit me harder than I expected. We were both stuck in our respective worlds, looking at each other from afar but never truly reaching out.
I took a deep breath, feeling the biting winter air fill my lungs before exhaling slowly. “We can’t keep doing this, Harry,” I said finally, breaking the silence that had fallen between us.
He looked at me then, his gaze filled with understanding and something else I couldn't quite place. “I know,” he replied softly, his eyes never leaving mine.
The future was uncertain and full of challenges. But if there was one thing I had learnt from this whole ordeal, it was that some chances are worth taking. No matter how daunting they may seem.
281 notes · View notes
Note
Hey!
Fantastic writing, feeding the Vox fans I thank you!
Anyway, in the meeting the Vees with Retro you have Retro state to Val they can't dance.
Would you consider doing a one shot of Vox teaching them to dance? I think that would make a perfect kinda date for them.
Dancing lessons
Tumblr media
As the soft melody filled the air, Vox extended his hand to me, a nervous yet eager smile playing on my lips. I tentatively placed my hand in his, my heart fluttering with anticipation. With a gentle squeeze, he pulled me close, our bodies swaying in sync with the music.
"Are you ready?" Vox asked, his voice low and smooth, his eyes sparkling with amusement.
I nodded, feeling a flush of excitement and nervousness coursing through me. Dancing had never been my forte, but with Vox by my side, I was willing to give it a try.
With a confident smile, Vox placed one hand on my waist, his touch sending a shiver down my spine, before clasping my other hand in his.
"Okay, darling, just relax and follow my lead,” he murmured, his breath hot on my neck. “We’ll take it slow.”
As the music swelled around us, Vox began to move with effortless grace, guiding me through the steps of the dance. I stumbled at first, my feet tripping over themselves in my eagerness to keep up, but Vox's steady presence kept me grounded.
"Relax," Vox whispered, his breath warm against my ear. "Let the music guide you."
I nodded, my grip tightening slightly on his hand as I tried to mimic his movements. My steps were hesitant at first, my feet stumbling over his, but his reassuring presence anchored me.
"Easy, sweetheart," he chuckled softly, steadying me with a gentle hand on my waist. "Just take it one step at a time. You're doing great."
But even as we danced, laughter bubbled between us, the occasional misstep or stumble only serving to heighten the sense of intimacy between us. Vox's infectious grin mirrored my own, his eyes alight with mischief and affection.
With each misstep, Vox patiently corrected me, his voice a constant source of encouragement. "That's it, darling. You're getting the hang of it," he murmured, guiding me through the intricate dance with ease.
I closed my eyes, allowing myself to surrender to the rhythm of the music, letting Vox's movements guide my own. With each step, I felt myself growing more confident, more at ease in his arms.
I felt a sense of exhilaration building within me. We were having fun, and that’s what mattered. I was sloppy, sure, but he was so reassuring and kind, guiding me.
"Thank you," I whispered, my voice barely audible over the fading music.
As the song came to an end, we slowly came to a stop, our breaths mingling in the quiet intimacy of the moment. I looked up at him, my eyes shining with gratitude and love.
Vox smiled down at me, and I could’ve sworn I saw his screen turn a bit more pink as he looked away for a moment. "Anytime, my dear. Anytime."
27 notes · View notes
bi-buckrights · 2 days
Text
20 Questions for Fic Writers
Tagged by the lovely @hippolotamus thank you my friend 💕
How many works do you have on ao3?
Just 12! I started writing almost a year and a half ago and I am very slow lmao
What's your total ao3 word count?
204,888
What fandoms do you write for?
Just 9-1-1! Honestly haven't felt the urge to write for any others.
Top five fics by kudos:
Bottled Poetry
Pick a Star on the Dark Horizon (Follow the Light)
You and Me Here (underneath the mistletoe)
Home is Just Another Word for You
Kiss Me Before it's Over (If Only for a Minute)
Do you respond to comments?
Yes!! Comments make my day so I love responding to them! Although I am very far behind...
What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
I have to have write happy endings so I can't really answer this 😂
What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Also difficult to answer since they are all happy endings... but I think that Pick a Star on the Dark Horizon (Follow the Light) has the most rewarding happy ending after all the angst I put them through 😅
Do you get hate on fics?
Mehh I've gotten a few somewhat rude comments but thankfully nothing notable
Do you write smut?
I dabble... particularly in my FWB baseball au 😏 and my upcoming pirate au 😌
Craziest crossover:
I don't foresee myself writing any crossovers asdkfjh
Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not that I know of...
Have you ever had a fic translated?
I don't think so, but I would be honored if someone wanted to translate one of my fics!
Have you ever cowritten a fic before?
No, my writing schedule is too unpredictable and I feel so bad if someone is relying on me 😭
All time favourite ship?
Buddie!! Obviously. But I have been loving Bucktommy, and Destiel will always have my heart.
What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
I don't know if my beloved wedding fic will ever return to from the war... Different first meeting, Buck and Eddie reunite at Madney's wedding.
What are your writing strengths?
Umm. uh. pass? I honestly dont know adsfkjh but I like writing multichapter fics and weaving the different parts of the story together (idk if I'm any good at it though lmaooo)
What are your writing weaknesses?
Actually writing... asdfkjlh
Thoughts on dialogue in another language?
I've never added it but I know if I ever needed to include it for any reason I know I could consult my lovely spanish speaking friends <333
First fandom you wrote in?
9-1-1!
Favorite fic you've written?
ohhh not to be repetitive about this fic but probably Pick a Star on the Dark Horizon (Follow the Light), my army marriage of convenience au which is very personal and special to me ❤️
Tagging @monsterrae1 @prettyboybuckley @rogerzsteven @loserdiaz @saybiwithme
@spotsandsocks @eddiebabygirldiaz @hoodie-buck @exhuastedpigeon @bidisasterevankinard
@bekkachaos @loveyouanyway @elvensorceress @spaceprincessem
27 notes · View notes
fandomfluffandfuck · 24 hours
Note
I've always had a thought of Pornstar au with Stucky but I never have enough time to write one, mainly bcs the words won't come out and i fucking hate myself sooooooo
I'll just punch my idea here for you bcs so suddenly, I can't stop thinking of Pornstar!Seb HAHAHAHA but I'll stick with my original idea of STUCKY instead of Evanstan although I do love those two idiots AHJSSJJE
Right uhm, anyways, this prompt started off with well, porn, obviously bcs I'm a budding artist who wants to practice nsfw stuff (ehem😌😌) and the first place I went to for pose references were Porn sites
I was hit with sudden inspiration out of nowhere when I got reminded that Steve was a fucking artist SJIDHEIJEUR my mind is then consumed by the idea of one Steve Rogers, scrolling through a porn site looking for pose references when he stumbles into a single account
It's nothing special to be honest but what catches his eye is the full sleeve tattoo on the stars left arm. Curious, Steve checks the account out and discovers Winter_Soldier who's got quite the following. Steve is immediately enthralled at the sight of the man and his silky brown hair, the only thing visible about his face being his bright steel blue eyes. Winter is thicc, chest big enough you could fuck a dick between it and a pair of thighs Steve's sure enough could crush a water melonn NGHHHH don't even get Steve started with his dick, a pretty thing thats anything but little
Bucky might like to bottom but he could fuck if he wants, those sessions where he'd bring another pornstar over for a joint video and he'd practically fuck them to the mattress. Steve salivates at the thought of getting bedded by Bucky, brain just gone at the idea of having Bucky spread on his bed for him to take or of Bucky between his legs, ready to fuck him stupid
He's so adventurous too, his videos containing multiple angles of him fucking his thick ass onto an equally thick dildo, voice slightly muffled from behind the mask but still loud enough that Steve could pick up his mewling ramblings. Winter has a seductive voice that melts to a whine whenever he's got something in him and What's supposed to be Steve looking for pose references and practicing his anatomy's ends up with him furiously jerking off to this gorgeous man
Steve has never seen someone so enticing before, the way Winters body would curve and bend, slick hole making way for the thick dildos he liked to shove in. He fucks and liked to talk, his god given voice rumbly as he spoke to his audiences, taking requests or just simply dirty talking GOOD LORD AJDHWJRHRJJEEJ Steve can't take his eyes off the monitor and his hand off his dick, eyes always coming back to the intricate robot like design of Winters left arm
Somehow, Steve manages to finish his practice but not before he nearly bled himself dry with how much he jerked off. His sketch book suddenly filled with a brown haired masked pornstar. Some hour later, he stumbles out of his room and into the shared kitchen of the dorm he's renting. He nearly trips when he finds his roommate James cooking some dinner
He's been rooming with James for nearly a year now but they're not really close (yet). In Steve's opinion, he's too pretty for his own good and Steve can never talk straight or properly whenever James is the one he's conversing with. James is very sweet though (he told Steve he could call him Bucky bcs that's what his friends call him), voice soft and always drowning in the oversized hoodie he favours. He's not small by any means, with a wider set of shoulder than Steve but he's definitely shorter by a couple of inches.
Steve's always ogling at Bucky whenever he could and he always thinks that his hair is pretty but a detail catches Steve's eyes with how he tied his hair in a messy bun as he cooked. It looked similar with... Steve freezes on the spot, staring at Bucky like an idiot. There's no way right?? It must be just a coincidence!!
Instinctively, Steve's gaze falls onto Bucky's left arm, covered with the long sleeves of his hoodie. Steve has never seen Bucky with his clothing off or just a simple sleeveless outfit and Winter did have a few tattoos, the most prominent one was the full sleeve on his left arm... Steve shakes himself. His roommate can't be the pornstar he's suddenly addicted to, that's just rude to assume
When Bucky calls him to share the dinner, steel blue eyes curved in a somewhat familiar smile, Steve's throat dries and he doesn't know if he hates or loves the possibility of his absurd idea
In the end though, it's not him who makes the official discovery. Instead, it's Bucky who makes the reveal when he finds one of Steve's sketchbook laying around, filled with sketches and practice of a familiar brown haired star in different positions and angles
Steve's all bashful at being caught with his 18+ content and Bucky practically drills his new obsession out of him with a glint in his eyes. When Steve confesses the fact that he's been having fantasies about Winter and woke up every morning with a boner, religiously coming to check Winters account for updates or live sessions, Bucky practically grins like the cat who got the cream, the shy facade giving away to Steve's dirtiest dream
"So you like my voice huh?" Bucky murmurs where he's coiled like a snake on the couch, his eyes going lidded as his voice dropped a few octaves. Steve is frozen at the other end of the couch, surprise and something else shimmering in his guts
"Tell me, Steve.. Do you keep coming back to my account because I provide you with good practice material or is it because I turn you on?" Bucky practically purred, uncoiling and starting to crawl his way to Steve. Considering that their couch isn't that big and neither of them are small, Steve suddenly has his dreams on his lap
"I just needed practice," he weakly says and Bucky's lips curve into a smirk that would follow Steve to his dreams, face finally full with his bright eyes. Ever so slowly, Bucky leans until he's got his lips straight to Steve's ear, squirming on his laps and arms around his neck
"I could give you a live modelling session," he whispers, breath hot against Steve's flushed skin. He shivers and Bucky's next words makes his hand come up to Bucky's waist to squeeze tightly.
"And if you want a live demonstration with yourself included.. well, I can give you that too."
AHAHAHAH I don't know what to do with this prompt but plssss it's been haunting me (HAH), anyways, tis just a tease but they basically fuck (obviously 🙄🙄) and we can have the dynamic of Bucky happily expanding Steves sexual experiences and Steve happily allowing Bucky to expand his sexual experiences SKWJJEJEJE
-🫠🫠
related to this
I feel that, words are hard, but don't downplay what you have because what you have FUCKS!!
Tumblr media
Also, I love that. Sometimes you gotta go to the source for references 👀 I get it. That is SUCH a great idea, though! I fuck with that so hard! Artist!Steve looking for inspiration and stumbling onto pornstar Bucky... 😮‍💨😮‍💨
And pornstar Bucky, who's thick with INK?
Kill me. Oh, wait, you already have!
Jesusss.
He's a switch, too? I'm salivating. The mask?? The whimpering? I'm being murdered! 😫 WOOF he does sound so damn enticing. Fuck.
THE PLOT THICKENS!
Roommates??
Tumblr media
I do not have words. Brain scrambled. Useless. I am fucking obsessed with the idea of Steve going from avid consumer of Bucky's pornography to being a part of it. Living his fantasy. Actually.
Yes!! I would love to see this written because imagine all the shit they could get into! All the kinks they could explore (especially exhibitionism, getting off to being watched). All the toys that I'm sure Bucky has. Expanding on how it comes out, too, would be so good. Draw it out. Build it up. Does Steve catch him shooting porn when he's supposed to be out? Is it not confirmed like that? When does Steve see him without long-sleeves on for the first time? Is it in private? Is it in public, and he has to act normal? Does Bucky make Steve stutter through it and ask himself if he does porn, by chance, or does Bucky easily handle it, grinning and nonchalantly confirming it? Plus, building up to Steve's first time on camera would be killer. His nerves and excitement and then his embarrassment when he gets on camera and he's so revved up that he cums so fast.
God.
You could go so many ways!
Either way, written or not, this AU is going to live rent-free in my head because 🤌🏻yes🤌🏻
Imagine all the "roommate walked in on me" fantasy porn they could shoot 😮‍💨😮‍💨
16 notes · View notes
krirebr · 2 days
Text
So, I've been going back and forth about sharing this here but it's really been dominating my thoughts for the last two days, and while I've talked about it a lot with friends, I'm hoping that writing everything down will help me process things. And maybe other people, especially aspec people might be able to relate.
I mentioned on Wednesday that I'd had a really terrible evening that had really shaken and upset me. Below the cut, I want to share what happened.
TWs for references to depression, aphobia, exclusionism, and bad therapy (there's probably a better word for it but I'm not sure what it would be.)
So some of you know that I started this year with a pretty intense depressive episode. It was bad enough that I had to take a leave of absence from work and pretty much spent that whole time crying in bed. It's taken a lot of work over the last few months to get myself back to a more stable place. A big part of that work has been regularly going to therapy.
I went to therapy on and off as a kid and in college, but not at all since then. All of my previous therapeutic experience was long before I came out as aroace. There's a long, ongoing history of aspec identities being medicalized and pathologized and that's something I was very aware of while looking for a therapist this time around. But I was also really desperate for help. So I chose as wisely as I could and crossed my fingers.
I chose a queer therapist who specialized in LGBTQ issues. I told them I was aroace in my first session and while they didn't seem very familiar at all, they also didn't make me overly explain myself or want to focus on that rather than the very real and urgent issues I had come to them for, which is what I'd been most worried about.
As I continued to meet with them weekly, they would sometimes ask questions about it, and while it was pretty clear they didn't really get it, they were respectful about it and it wasn't interfering with the help I actually needed.
That brings me to my appointment this Wednesday. I didn't have anything really pressing to discuss so they asked about my plans for the week and I mentioned that I was getting my hair cut and I was excited because I've been feeling lately like my hair is really hetero (I use that word instead of straight because my hair is so, so curly 😂) and I was looking forward to having queer hair again. They stopped. "Wait," they said, "I'm confused. Why did you use that word to describe yourself?" It had never occurred to them that aspec identities would be considered part of the queer community. They, in fact, had an incredibly narrow definition of the word queer - gay, just gay. And they didn't consider asexuality or aromanticism to be orientations at all.
My memories of the following conversation are pretty jumbled, but some highlights included such chestnuts as "What if you meet the right person one day?", asserting that the A in LGBTQIA+ stands for ally, there has to be a sexual component to romantic relationships, and "everyone has to have attraction, humans are sexual beings." They also said that we should dig into my childhood going forward because they were sure there was something there that caused this. I had a pretty traumatic middle school experience (bullying and some psychosomatic stuff that stemmed from that) and they were pretty eager to blame all that for this.
I became increasingly defensive and combative as this conversation went on (which if you know me, isn't like me at all). It ended with us both feeling very bad and uncomfortable.
I think they kind of came around a little bit by the end. They seemed open to educating themselves and even sent me a link to an article they'd found after our session. And that's great, I guess? But the whole thing made me want to crawl out of my skin. I cried a lot when I got home.
I'm not exactly sure what to do from here. My initial plan was to go next week, talk through what happened, offer some context for why I had gotten so defensive, and discuss together whether this was going to be a good long-term fit. But that's feeling less and less likely the more I think about it (I haven't been able to stop thinking about it). This is just such a big part of who I am. And it's a part of myself that I like and am proud of! And I just can't imagine a situation where I would ever feel safe talking about this aspect of my life with them. And I don't really want therapy where I'm constantly having to censor myself. So do I even go to my next appointment? I really don't know.
I know there's a lot of hopelessness in the aspec community around getting mental health care and I really don't want to add to that. I don't want to believe that we can't get help for our actual issues without mental health professionals just wanting to fix things that don't actually need to be fixed. And I hope that's not the moral or ultimate outcome of this story. I've talked to my very lovely network of queer friends and several of them have already said that they'll reach out to their contacts to find some recommendations for me. I deserve to get the help that I need in a space that is actually safe. And my need isn't as urgent as I was. I can take my time now to find someone I'm fully comfortable with.
I'm not sure exactly why I shared this. I don't always get so personal on here. And some of you have already heard it (thank you for being such good friends, seriously). But it's just been festering inside of me for the past two days and I really needed to share it. Thank you for listening.
17 notes · View notes
xaytheloser · 2 hours
Text
The Prince in a Gilded Cage
characters: Dark Cacao Cookie, Dark Choco Cookie, Mystic Flour Cookie, Caramel Arrow Cookie Tw: manipulation, warping one's morality, isolation, kidnapping, my shit ass writing (while Mystic Flour Cookie's gender is unknown, I will be using she/her for them for this fic)
Tumblr media
"leave him be, in due time, he shall see that this is for the best." "..." "oh, come now, Dark Cacao Cookie... you do not wish to fail him like you did before... do you?" "...no. I do not." "that is what I thought, in order for your kingdom to prosper, some extremes are necessary to be made... your son may not understand now, but he will, in due time..." .... Dark Cacao had been having more frequent conversations with the Light of Resolution, at least.. that has what the ancient beast Mystic Flour Cookie had been disguising herself as.. the king had been placed under some form of.. possession, his morality and mind warping into a more twisted version of his former self.. "your kingdom is at risk, Dark Cacao Cookie.. listen to me... I shall guide you.." the king began pushing his workers to the brink of exhaustion, applying even more heavy layers of chocolate to the ever growing wall, not only did the king now demand that the wall strengthen in thickness, he demanded it's height to increase. now the wall nearly covered the entire citadel, casting it into a large looming shadow. perimeter checks around the citadel's borders become the regular, with soldiers being forced to track the harsh blizzard ridden territory for the slightest threat. the king also had a new objective, to find his son. the "Light of Resolution" stated the reason behind this as for him to... "make amends" with his lost son, and while Dark Cacao had thought about sending soldiers out for his son, he was hesitant until the Light of Resolution... persuaded him.. "you wish to make things right between the two of you?" "...yes, desperately so..." "hmph... then do it." .... "...father..?" the harsh wind howled through the air, Dark Cacao and his troops had trashed Dark Choco Cookie's camp site, his tent in shambles and belongings scatters throughout the site. the father and son stood and stared at each other, all while Mystic Flour did her work in warping the king's thoughts once more.. "you wish to make things right, correct? then make it right." "yes.. soldiers, restrain my son." "..what..?" Dark Cacao watched as his soldiers tackled his son to the ground, pinning him down without any second thought, all while the "Light of Resolution" whispered into his ear, "soon, you will have the happy family that you desire.." .... sweets, rainbow jellies, books, warm clothes, all the things that Dark Choco could desire, nothing could get the young prince out of his silent brooding state. his room was locked heavily, chains and padlocks covering his door, as to prevent his escape, his father even made sure to lock him up in the highest tower, without a window.. his father would visit him, bring him meals, and trying to get back even a semblance of normality between him and his son.. but Dark Choco talked about nothing than about his release. "father, I-" "it is out of the question, Dark Choco Cookie, you shall not be let out until it is safe for you.." "I am not a child, father, I do not need your protection, it was you who taught me to protect myself, now, you want me to stay here, only to follow your orders like some child..?" "...." his father never replied to his questions, shutting them down whenever he speak up, leaving his heavily guarded room, and locking him all by himself again. .... the cold winter wind howled outside, Dark Choco Cookie could not sleep, he did not wish to sleep.. he had to find out what was wrong with his father, he knew that.. something was wrong... *CLANK!* Dark Choco heard the locks to his room unlock, with a heavy creek of the door opening.. "...Caramel Arrow... Cookie..?" "my prince.. come with me.. I know that the king is not well.. I aim to help aid him.... will you assist me?" "..." ....
19 notes · View notes
mk-writes-stuff · 2 days
Text
Personality Through Quotes
Rules: write quotes for your OCs following the prompts, then create a new prompt for the next people
Thanks @mysticstarlightduck, @elsie-writes, and @kaylinalexanderbooks for the tags! My prompts are, “a quote about their relationship with money,” “a quote about getting or being sick,” and “a quote about a weird habit they or someone else has.”
A quote about their relationship with money
Belladonna: “I try to be reasonable with my budget, but a noblewoman can afford to splurge.”
Cassie: “Yeah, fine, I’ll admit this bodyguard shit pays pretty well. Still not worth dealing with nobles.”
Nellie: “I just got my first paycheque yesterday! Cassie said she’d take me shopping, and I’m so excited. I’ve never been shopping before.”
Narcissus: “Money? Why would I worry about that? My station can afford it.”
Ricinus: “Proper budgeting is essential to station management.”
Goldenrod: “Ricinus always complains about me spending money. I don’t know why, we can afford it.”
Cassiopeia: “My station always does well financially. I keep a good hold on it.”
Stellaris: “I’m not good with numbers, but that doesn’t mean I can’t budget! It just takes me a bit longer, that’s all.”
Rhys: “I’ve never had money. Clones don’t get paid.”
Sel: “Money! I know what that is and how to spend it… of course…”
A quote about getting or being sick
Belladonna: “I hate being sick. Luckily, it doesn’t happen too often, but I hate how little I can get done and how puffy my face always looks.”
Cassie: “Couple of coworkers on the lower station told me that a couple ibuprofen and a shot’ll keel you from feeling any illness, and let me tell you, it fucking works.”
Nellie: “I feel sick all the time right now. The doctor said the withdrawal does that, but it’s still miserable.”
Narcissus: “I don’t get sick. But if I did, I’d still look immaculate.” (I feel the need to impress that this is a massive lie.)
Ricinus: “I don’t enjoy getting sick, but it’s a sign I need a break.”
Goldenrod: “Ricinus never takes care of me when I’m sick. It’s so unfair.”
Cassiopeia: “Illness is an unfortunate fact of life. It’s important that I take care of myself when it happens.”
Stellaris: “I feel sick all the time. I hate it.”
Rhys: “I only ever seem to get sick when Goldenrod gets me to wait on her while she is. It’s part of the job, I suppose.”
Sel: “Being sick is stressful. What if I’m feverish and I say something I don’t mean?”
A quote about a weird habit they or someone else has
Belladonna: “Cassie seems to think taking her hand off repeatedly counts as fidgeting. I’ve told her it doesn’t, but she doesn’t listen to me.”
Cassie: “Belladonna thinks I have weird habits? She’s the one who eats like a fucking weirdo, have you seen the way she practically plots out every bite like it’s a fucking military maneuver?”
Nellie: “I don’t understand why Rhys holds his knives the way he does. I really should ask him. It just seems unsafe to hold them in a fist like that - he keeps cutting himself. I’m worried about him.”
Narcissus: “I don’t understand why everyone seems to be in the constant habit of trying to one-up me. I mean, it’s already clear that I’m superior to them and it’s not going to work - what are they trying to achieve?”
Ricinus: “Goldenrod’s peculiar habits all make sense to me. I know they’re covers for her to cheat.”
Goldenrod: “Ricinus thinks he’s being subtle with his little sneaky methods to see if I’m cheating, but I know what he’s up to.”
Cassiopeia: “I don’t understand Stellaris. He’s always waving his hands in the air and making some little squealing noise. I’ve told him it’s undignified, but he won’t stop.”
Stellaris: “I know my little hand movements and little sounds make me a freak, but they feel so natural and so relieving that sometimes they just happen.”
Rhys: “Nellie says I hold my knives weird. I know I do, but I can’t seem to hold them the right way. My hands don’t listen to me.”
Sel: “I know I have strange habits. I pull at my hair when I’m anxious.” *is currently pulling his hair*
I don’t feel super confident in this one but it’s done now :)
@illarian-rambling @somethingclevermahogony @touloserlautrec want to play? Your prompt is, “a quote about rest.”
15 notes · View notes
emoclownemoji · 1 year
Text
…she’s the man rhaenicent AU….
Tumblr media
53 notes · View notes
sabraeal · 4 months
Text
1000 Followers Update!
Due to some super fun chronic health shenanigans, the posting for the 1000 Followers Celebration is being postponed a month! Posting will start on 2/2 with to all the ghost still standing in this room, and continue as previously planned from there. Thank you guys for bearing with me-- I struggled with the idea of even postponing for a week, but it became very clear on Monday that I would not be able to catch up with the schedule unless I took an extended break to recover. Can't wait to show you guys what I've got up my sleeve!
#1000 followers#i don't talk much about my illness struggles on here because without a word count limit#i would absolutely write myself into a terrible spiral talking about some of the very recent setbacks#but I do weekly goals up on twitter and I often talk about what's going on there#so it's only fair that i explain a bit in some tag chatter where i have to stay on task#to start: i'm fine and I'm going to be quick to recover now that i've gotten my meds#but due to all sorts of insurance bullshittery that has occurred since september/october#my last three infusions have been over a week late. two of them have been nearly two weeks or over#and coupled with a particularly nasty stomach bug + christmas stress#i ended up with extremely bad exhaustion and brain fog#and on monday finally flared#thankfully i was able to move my infusion up a day so I only had to wait until wednesday#and me and my husband had planned that I would be out of commission for the 10 days my meds were overdue#so I just had to triage my commitments and lay low until they could get me what i needed#it's been two days and i'm doing much much better. back to a place where I can actually write#probably at a better place than i have been since the beginning of December since today I nearly blew through 1K without even trying#but it's been 2-3 weeks of barely being able to scratch out what i consider my minimum#and then a week and change of not being able to even READ without it overwhelming me#so i finally had to face the music of: not only can I NOT do this on time but I need fully shift it#so that I can work without stressing myself or my limits#i am a rat gnawing at the bars of my little rat cage over it but it is what it is#tldr; i'm here i'm fine i just have to accept my human limitations and i don't like it
12 notes · View notes
obstinatecondolement · 6 months
Text
My sister was saying "You should write that idea for a novel about [REDACTED] that you had a while ago for NaNo. I think that could be really fun" and I was like oh yeah! I remember we got a kick out of that one. And then, after a pause, had be like... could you remind me what the plot was again? Because litearlly all I could remember was that it had been funny At The Time and involved [REDACTED].
It was like when my mum reads a book and strongly recommends it to me the day after she finishes it, but can't remember any of the characters names or what happened, but it was definitely very good and I should read it so we can talk about it!
Except this was a story I made up myself and devoted not an insignificant amount of thought to, and then never committed any of what I came up with to the page because it was still early stages and I would "remember" what my initial ideas were 🙄
#fortunately my sister did remember enough that it kickstarted my brain and I remembered#but jesus christ...#how many perfectly good ideas have I squandered because I didn't think I would forget about them?#it's one thing not ever writing stuff I had ideas for because of y'know *gestures towards my general inability to follow through on things*#but actually forgetting ideas entirely feels much worse#I miss having an eidetic memory :(#but also I kind of wish I'd never had it because I never developed the habit of writing things down to remember them#until WELL into adulthood#because I'd ever needed to for most of my life#I just remembered every single word I had ever read or heard and almost every idea I'd given more than passing thought to in perfect detail#as a child I'd get so angry about people getting single words of quotations wrong or misremembering minute details of conversations we'd ha#because I *did not understand* that they weren't just being sloppy and inexact#and that they really couldn't remember things the same way I could#I really did not understand that other people experienced the world differently to me at that age#when they contradicted what I believed to be universal truths I thought they were trying to upset me or make me feel bad about myself#like when my friend agreed with my parents that apple juice was nicer than orange juice (when no one could *really* believe that)#I fully felt that as a betrayal#and thought she was implicitly co-signing my parents to hurt me#and that the subtext of the criticism was that I was evil and self indulgent for not resisting the wicked temptations of orange juice#and never even trying to be virtuous and subject myself to apple juice#which was obviously not as nice but was the more moral and 'healthy' (which was the same things as moral) choice#oh christ this has gotten away from me...#I hate being triggered by dumb bullshit that brings me back to weird esoteric traumas from my youth#can I please stop being triggered by such embarrassingly trivial bullshit for five minutes???
7 notes · View notes
Text
Dude my co-worker is brick stupid. Just black hole level of dense. Jesus fucking Christ.
9 notes · View notes
alectology-archive · 2 years
Text
okay but it does amuse me that I looked at crossroads of twilight and decided that actually sanderson finishing the series WOULD probably turn out to be a very good choice since he’s good at pay-offs and rj already had so many things set up for him until like. he killed the heart and soul of the series, lol.
3 notes · View notes
nezzling · 3 months
Text
Me going on a rant about my struggles with eating, hydration, and addiction and jokingly saying "I need a caretaker I swear to god" to be met with "I'll happily be your caretaker, you know, if the job position is open" whaaat I'm screaming, crying, throwing up, so go get a mop mate cause you're on duty now
#been thinking about that for two days so had to write it down lol#idk how this man has watched me go through such insanity in my life and dating and be like yeah me next lmao#not to mention the insane level of patience he has which honestly is needed with me#but hes been so patient leaving the ball in my court while ive been figuring myself out#like he literally had to pick me up crying from the airport after someone else broke my heart#and hes had to deal with me going nonverbal for days and days bc i wastnt able to keep him up to date with my thoughts#bc i had so many niche anxieties about really future based things#but like i finally expressed all that and it was just met with kindness and understanding???#like wym you dont hate me for Thinking and Worrying About Things whaaaat#very romeo and juliet type dynamic where both of our families will almost definitely hate each other#tbf i also hate most of my family lmaooooooo#so i mean as long as his family accepted me or as long as he would be willing to stand up for me with his family thats all that matters#cause one issue ive had twice already is people talking ABOUT ME directly in front of me in another language#like pls i loveeeeeee our native language but talking about anyone in front of them is rude enough without my level of bpd and anxiety#and man he was so amazing about understanding how rotten that felt bc hes experienced that exact feeling#so its just like hes easing every little worry as they pop up even if it takes me a lot of quiet days to be able to say the worry#but i meannnnnnn i have convinced him to move back to my city when semester starts soooooooo#also for the nosey people this isnt like a new fling or anything lol i feel like it comes across like im hop skip jumping around again#hes followed my tiktok since my original launch on there and we've been talking as friends for so long now#the way i still havent followed him back on tiktok to this day just for the laugh of it ahahaha#no but this has been a very slow process of learning about each other and growing trust#but the first time we hung out last year it was just like i had a Best Friend back#it was so easy and natural and all we do is make jokes and laugh constantly#but the one thing ive had to accept is a good indicator is that he makes me calm#and that says a LOT because I am NEVER calm as someone with all my acronyms#but anytime im around him my nervous system goes into rest mode and its actually insane how peaceful it feels#ive had to do a lot of inner battles about superficial nonsense in order to make myself realise i shoudnt be constantly anxious when dating#like why have i been forcing myself to be around people who literally inflame my entire body and mind#hes like medicine to me and also i think i have reached the tag limit now lolllllll#lil rambles
1 note · View note
maniculum · 7 months
Text
Medieval Scorpions Effortpost
So yesterday I reblogged this post featuring an 11th-century depiction of the Apocalypse Locusts from Revelations, noting the following incongruity as another medieval scorpion issue:
Tumblr media
The artist, as you can see, has interpreted "tails like scorpions" as meaning "glue cheerful-looking snakes to their butts".
Anyway, it occurred to me that the medieval scorpion thing might not be as widely known as I think it is, and that Tumblr would probably enjoy knowing about it if it isn't known already. So, finding myself unable to focus on the research I'm supposed to be doing, I decided to write about this instead. I'll just go ahead and put a cut here.
As we can see in the image above, at least one artist out there thought a "scorpion" was a type of snake. Which makes it difficult to draw "tails like scorpions", because a snake's tail is not that distinctive or menacing (maybe rattlesnakes, but they don't have those outside the Americas). So they interpreted "tails like scorpions" as "the tail looks like a whole snake complete with head".
Let me tell you. This is not a problem unique to this illustration.
See, people throughout medieval Europe were aware of scorpions. As just alluded to, they are mentioned in the Bible, and if the people producing manuscripts in medieval Europe knew one thing, it was Stuff In Bible. They're also in the Zodiac, which medieval Europe had inherited through classical sources. However, let's take a look at this map:
Tumblr media
That's Wikipedia's map of the native range of the Scorpiones order, i.e., all scorpion species. You may notice something -- the range just stops at a certain northern latitude. Pretty much all of northern Europe is scorpion-free. If you lived in the north half of Europe, odds were good you had never seen a scorpion in your life. But if you were literate or educated at all, or you knew they were a thing, because you'd almost certainly run across them being mentioned in texts from farther south. And those texts wouldn't bother to explain what a scorpion was, of course -- everyone knows scorpions, right? When was the last time you stopped to explain What Is Spiders?
So medieval writers and artists in northern Europe were kind of stuck. There was all this scorpion imagery and metaphor in the texts they liked to work from, but they didn't really know what a scorpion was. Writers could kind of work around it (there's a lot of "oh, it's a venomous creature, moving on"), but sometimes they felt the need to break it down better. For this, of course, they'd have to refer to a bestiary -- but due to Bestiary Telephone and the persistent need of bestiary authors to turn animals into allegories, one of the only visual details you got on scorpions was that they... had a beautiful face, which they used to distract people in order to sting them.
And look. I'm not here to yuck anyone's yum, but I would say that a scorpion's face has significant aesthetic appeal only for a fairly small segment of the population. I'm sure you could get an entomologist to rhapsodize about it a bit, but your average person on the street will not be entranced by the face of a scorpion. So this did not help the medieval Europeans in figuring out how to depict scorpions. There was also some semantic confusion -- see, in some languages (such as Old and Middle English), "worm" could be a general term for very small animals of any kind. But it also could mean "serpent".* So there were some, like our artist at the top of the post, who were pretty sure a scorpion was a snake. This was probably helped along by the fact that "venomous" was one of the only things everyone knew about them, and hey, snakes are venomous. Also, Pliny the Elder had floated the idea that there were scorpions in Africa that could fly, and at least one author (13th-century monk Bartholomaeus Anglicus) therefore suggested that they had feathers. I don't see that last one coming up much, I just share it because it's funny to me.
*English eventually resolved this by borrowing the Latin vermin for very small animals, using the specialized spelling wyrm for big impressive mythical-type serpents, and sticking with the more specific snake for normal serpents.
Some authors, like the anonymous author of the Ancrene Wisse, therefore suggested that a scorpion was a snake with a woman's face and a stinging tail. (Everyone seemed to be on the same page with regards to the fact that the sting was in the tail, which is in fact probably the most recognizable aspect of scorpions, so good job there.) However, while authors could avoid this problem, visual artists could not. And if you were illustrating a bestiary or a calendar, including a scorpion was not optional. So they had to take a shot at what this thing looked like.
And so, after this way-too-long explanation, the thing you're probably here for: inaccurate medieval drawings of scorpions. (There are of course accurate medieval drawings of scorpions, from artists who lived in the southern part of Europe and/or visited places where scorpions lived; I'm just not showing you those.) And if you find yourself wondering, "how sure are you that that's meant to be a scorpion?" -- all of these are either from bestiaries or from calendars that include zodiac illustrations.
Tumblr media
11th-century England, MS Arundel 60. (Be honest, without the rest of this post, if I had asked you to guess what animal this was supposed to be, would you have ever guessed “scorpion”?)
Tumblr media
12th-century Germany, "Psalter of Henry the Lion". (Looks a bit undercooked. Kind of fetal.)
Tumblr media
12th-century France, Peter Lombard's Sententiae. (Very colorful, itsy bitsy claws, what is happening with that tail?)
Tumblr media
12th-century England, "The Shaftesbury Psalter". (So a scorpion is some sort of wyvern with a face like a duck, correct?)
Tumblr media
13th-century France, Thomas de Cantimpré's Liber de natura rerum. (I’d give them credit for the silhouette not being that far off, but there’s a certain bestiary style where all the animals kind of look like that. Also note how few of these have claws.)
Tumblr media
13th-century England, "The Bodley Bestiary". (Mischievous flying squirrel impales local man’s hand, local man fails to notice.)
Tumblr media
13th-century England, Harley MS 3244. (A scorpion is definitely either a mouse or a fish. Either way it has six legs.)
Tumblr media
13th-century England, Harley MS 3244. (Wait, no, it’s a baby theropod, and it has two legs. (Yes, this is the same manuscript, that’s not an error, this artist did four scorpions and no two are the same.))
Tumblr media
13th-century England, Harley MS 3244. (Actually it’s a lizard with tiny ears and it has four legs.)
Tumblr media
13th-century England, Harley MS 3244. (Now that we’re at the big fancy illustration, I think I’ve got it — it’s like that last one, but two legs, longer ears, and a less goofy face. Also I’ve decided it’s not pink anymore, I think that was the main problem.)
Tumblr media
13th-century England, MS Kk.4.25. (A scorpion is a flat crocodile with a bear’s head.)
Tumblr media
13th-century England, "The Huth Psalter". (Wyvern but baby! Does not seem to be enjoying biting its own tail.)
Tumblr media
13th-century England, MS Royal 1 D X. (This triangular-headed gentlecreature gets the award for “closest guess at correct limb configuration”. If two of those were claws, I might actually believe this artist had seen a scorpion before, or at least a picture of one.)
Tumblr media
13th-century England, "The Westminster Psalter". (A scorpion is the offspring of a wyvern and a fawn.)
Tumblr media
13th-century England, "The Rutland Psalter". (Too many legs! Pull back! Pull back!)
Tumblr media
13th or 14th-century France, Bestiaire d'amour rimé. (This is very similar to the fawn-wyvern, but putting it in an actual Scene makes it even more obvious that you’re just guessing.)
Tumblr media
14th-century Netherlands, Jacob van Maerlant's Der Naturen Bloeme. (More top-down six-legged guys that look too furry to be arthropods.)
Tumblr media
14th-century Germany, MS Additional 22413. (That is clearly a turtle.)
Tumblr media
14th-century France, Matfres Eymengau de Beziers's Breviari d'amor. (Who came up with that head shape and what was their deal?)
Tumblr media
15th-century England, "Bestiary of Ann Walsh". (Screw it, a scorpion is a big lizard that glares at you for trying to make me draw things I don’t know about.)
I've spent way too much time on this now. End of post, thank you to anyone who got all the way down here.
6K notes · View notes
8aji · 1 year
Text
i have the urge to write a very angsty friends to strangers to lovers with shinichiro i dont even know why
0 notes