#if there are typos in this no there arent. im so out of it rn you cant hold me responsible for that shit | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

the-s1lly-corner · 4 months

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CREEPYPASTA CHARACTERS CELEBRATING VALENTINE'S DAY

"but admin, its early January!" yeah well if christmas stuff can start coming the second fall starts then i can celebrate valentines early/j also i saw valentines stuff already being set up at the store and its gotten me in the mood writing this at 2:30 am while playing a roblox tycoon, im fighting demons rn... so tonights writing may be a little.... off... as per usual, jeff toby and ben are written as platonic (and honestly, i think platonic friendships are just as deserving of being celebrated too!) typos and blugh-y-ness aside, i hope you all enjoy!

SLENDERMAN:

i think he might be a little behind on the tradition... so you might have to fill him in...! i think once he gets an understanding of the holiday he tries to do something for you! i think he would pick flowers from around the forest for you ! so be prepared for that! but if you have an allergy or arent really a flower person, then i think he might find you a collection of cool rocks... maybe he even carves something from wood for you! dont forget picnics, too! i think he would take this as a moment to remind you how much he loves you... its not often that he verbalizes how much he values you.... well verbalize in terms of speaking in your head... but...! 8/10 hes my wife your honor!

SPLENDORMAN:

unlike his brother he DOES know what the holiday is and just know hes going to get this huge picnic set up for you! he cant exactly go out and buy you anything (actually... most of these characters cant....) so i think he might make you something! a handmade gift! isnt that nice! might give you a flower crown as well... i think he would try his hand at making the food for the picnic, i think unlike slender he can handle digesting human food... okayish... be it because he built a tolerance or because hes built different... shrugs... gives you a bouquet of sun flowers and makes the day about YOU... he would appreciate a gift, but hes not going to give you flack for not getting him anything 8/10 i love him too i wish i wrote for him more

EYELESS JACK:

honestly given that he lives in a cabin in the woods with like. zero ties to the outside world, he kind of loses his sense of time... kind of just relies off of the weather changing through the year to gauge what month it is... and even then that can only be so accurate... no youre probably going to have to remind him or drop some hints... kind of panics at first... i think he would offer to do some services for you (not like that) such as doing some work around your place, or cooking for you... but that doesnt mean much when he already kind of does that... hmmm.... offers to take you out to watch the stars, you guys end up exchanging stories... maybe if you ask nicely, he might come out with you to the streets and stroll around with you after everyone else has gone to bed... i dont think he really does... big gestures... 7/10 i still love him too and tbh my ass wouldnt mind not getting a huge gesture or gift

LAUGHING JACK:

i think he would go all out when he sees the valentines day commercials airing on the tv. i can see him making an arts and crafts thing for you but i can also see him just outright going to a store and stealing something. what are they going to do? arrest a 7 foot clown that can disappear into a puff of smoke? yeah right... whaaaaat? no of course he didnt steal this really expensive piece of jewelry! i think he would expect something in return though so you better have gotten him something! i think he would be satisfied with some candy, and perhaps some extra affection? please? generally easy to please during this holiday since hes just happy to have you around and to himself 9/10 i love him your honor hes my other wife

MASKY/TIM:

masky does know about the holiday, for the most part, usually from media and commercials, though... im still a little eh on how i write masky and hoodie in general but shhhh. i dont think he would see it as much of a big deal, though... but he can kind of see it being a big deal to you, if it is of course. i think he would just bluntly try to ask you what you want. no beating around the bush with this one... doesnt expect anything in return nor does he want anything... but i dont think he would deny you if you wanted to spoil him... 6/10 i love me a straight forward king

as for tim i think he might try to put some more romance into his attempt and try to surprise you... might cook you dinner and decorate the place to look fancy, since i dont think he would like going out to some fancy restaurant... gives you flowers, too... doesnt ask for anything in return either but his eyes do light up a little when you get him something, bonus if its not your typical valentines gift and its something thats more relevant and practical in the long run 6.5/10

HOODIE/BRIAN:

i think i can see hoodie being a little more playful in this scenario, but not by much... hes not at emotionally distant as masky is, but hes still not easy to read. i think he would make you something... maybe its because i see brian being into art and its bleeding into how i interpret hoodie, but i think he would paint you something... or maybe he tries to set up a little movie date for you two! makes a pillow fort to surprise you, too.. very nice, very calm night.. you guys stay up all night together. he refuses to fall asleep before you... 7/10

between the two if im going to go with the artist hc brian is the better artist and is generally more confident in his ability to make something that looks pleasing to the sight orbs. be it a portrait or something based around one of your interests, hes going to be working for weeks in advance trying to perfect it... i think he might also try to take you out for dinner, too. i can see brian being a bit of a romantic sap, probably plays your guys's songs while you're driving around town together 9/10 i would actually cry personally

TICCI TOBY:

between being on the run for krilling his dad and for burning his neighborhood down + working for slenderman toby isnt around often... but he does try to still make time for you, especially when theres holidays going on! hell, he still tries to come over when its saint pattys day. he doesnt care if he doesnt have green, hes still going to go check in on you. so hands down hes going to be there for you... though i dont think he would be able to offer you anything... so you two hanging out will have to suffice. while its not traditional to give your friends anything for valentines (which i think is bs, i like giving my friends candy and homemade goods) he might... just try to go shoplift some chocolate... please talk him out of it... 6/10 its a cool hang out, you guys probably watch movies and catch up!

JEFF THE KILLER:

"ew feelings and caring about others" kind of sums up jeffs views on valentines, and as immature as it sounds, its his true thoughts. so dont expect anything from him, i mean if you ask to hang out he might swing by your place. and by swing by i mean hes going to pick the lock to your window and let himself in through your bathroom... which scares the hell out of you considering youve given him a key to your house... similar to toby the day is spent like any other, which is fine.. not terrible, honestly. you guys probably just fuck around and do what you guys normally do, 6/10

BEN DROWNED:

"ew feelings and caring about others" for ben as well but thats because hes literally a ghost kid so it makes sense for him to have that mindset, so dont expect him to mention the day to you. i think if anything he might send you a png of those dumb valentines cards or memes but stress that hes only doing it because he thinks it might make you happy... which is sweet and sad because how often does ben get to interact and befriend people? communicate with them? otherwise you guys just do your own thing, 5/10

PUPPETEER:

oh hes going to be dramatic about it. you better get him something, reader! unlike laughing jack hes not easy to please! you better not pick him up some basic card from the store, you better make it unique to him! he doesnt eat so you dont need to burn a hole in your wallet to get him some expensive chocolates or plushies.. but what does he do for you? i think he would... do something similar in return, actually. maybe its the puppet theming but i can see him putting on a little show for you, or maybe even hand making you your own toy/plushie, totally catered to you and your interests! just know hes going to want your undivided attention for the entire day, and in return youre going to have his attention as well 7.5/10

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aikapwq · 2 years

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please dont leave.

modern!xiao x gn reader (no specified pronouns)

warnings ; a lil bit of swearing, angsty

today, your boyfriend, xiao, was out playing with his friends. you didnt really have a good mood. it isnt because of your boyfriend or anything — it was because of one of your so called "friend". you've posted on your whatsapp status that you dont want anyone disturbing you because of your bad mood today — and that "friend" kept bugging you trying to figure out what happened and what caused your bad mood.

" y/n, tell me what happened! tell me! or you dont wanna tell me because.. maybe i am the problem? " they asked.

" can you not? im rly trying to calm down rn and youre literally making it worse. " you replied with slight anger

" cmon, just tell me. it wont hurt! " they replied in confusion.

" i literally js told you i dont wanna share anything. do you not fucking understand? just shut the fuck up already. please stop talking to me. " you replied in complete anger. what the fuck is her problem???

after that they finally stopped disturbing you. you felt relieved, but — you have an active channel in telegram where you update everything in your life, the channel's only for your internet friends that are on tele. you were literally so mad you typed angrily,

" why the fuck are they so annoying?? ive already told them to stop talking to me because im already in a bad mood and they wont fucking leave me alone. fucks sake why cant they understand someone isnt comfortable to share their problems out of force. "

you typed a few more paragraphs then finally stopped and turned off your phone. you wanted to get some rest until—

beep! you have received a notification from: "lover 🤍"

"oh, a text from him! lemme see what he said." you thought. you opened your phone to see a long paragraph from him. you wondered - why the sudden long paragraph? and read it, it said,

" hey— um, y/n. i saw your message in the channel, is that directed to me? im sorry if i annoy you too much. i didnt know you were in a bad mood, i shouldnt have talked to you. ill give you some space. but um, yeah. take care of yourself, im coming back late at night. dont stay up too late. goodnight. "

you were shocked. wait— those messages arent even directed to him! why did he think of that in the first place?! there, you were shaking and crying, trying to text him with a blurry vision because of the tears,

" wait— xiao wait— xiao please dont leave me. xiao, xiao please answer. xiao- xiao please dont leave. please, please dont leave. pick up. please just respond i need you! "

you were quite surprised no typos were made despite your blurry vision, but that wasnt the point — today was tbe day your mood wasnt good, and you ruined your own boyfriend's mood because of your vent texts. god you fucked up so bad because today was the day you needed him so bad and yet, you ruined his day too.

xiaos pov;

65 unread texts, 2 missed calls. god, who was spamming me this bad? ill check later.

around 20 minutes later he finally opened his phone to 78 missed texts, 4 missed calls from " 我的爱 🦋" jeez. what do they even want from me?

as i read her texts, i realised she was kinda getting on my nerves.

" xiao?? xiao, xiao please just answer me— " were the only texts i read. too lazy to read the rest. i respond,

" what? "

your pov:

" oh hes online, finally. " you said quietly.

" what? " was the only text you received. did— did he not care anymore?..

" xiao, please just scroll above. i explained everything. i just— nvm just, please look at those messages.. i understand if you need some space and dont wanna talk to me rn. when you come home, sleep on the bed, dont carry me on the bed or smth, im sleeping outside lol. have fun wit your friends. night, im going to sleep. "

you knew damn well you werent. youre overly attached, so when every single minute passes by, you check your phone to see if youve gotten any texts from him. unfortunately there wasnt anything from him. well, youve promised to give space to him anyway. its practically pointless now knowing he wont respond. you should probably just cry to sleep. maybe things will get better tomorrow.

:: a/n — hiii i felt abit angsty today so i um kinda tried writing angst wirh my creativity ig. some of these things are based on true events lolol. oh, thanks for the attention on my Xiao hcs btw ^^ love yall ❤️ please consider reblogging/ liking this post if you like it! follow me too btw :") okiess bye !!

#xiao x reader #xiao angst #genshin impact #fanfics #gaming #Spotify

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romancemoved · 2 years

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5,6 and 13!

✨ @svmmercmance. meme. still accepting!

5. Would it make you happy if someone corrected your writing mistakes, perhaps gave you feedback?

sure but let’s be real a lot people arent here to improve on anything or whatever lol. and if im gonna be honest tumblr isnt the place to come for correction or to learn anyway. and im saying this because the communities i come from are really critique heavy. we’d redline each others art to correct anatomy, etc etc. i dont mind my mistakes like typos and shit being corrected! ive wanted to do the same but that kind of fell out of rp etiquette... years ago.

these days i just send my stuff to my husband whether rp or my novel draft and let him comb through it. and he’s pretty honest almost brutally so and never has minced words w. me so glfkjgldkf.

6. What is something that you didn’t think you will write but now you are writing it?

ive been rping since 1999 i’ve written it all at this point. i’ve never been shy and intimidated in approaching characters and character types and topics cuz i just think that’s silly tbh!! anyone worth their salt will be up for anything, even if they arent very good at it. its all about experimenting.... get ur hands dirty.....

13. Have a ship partner promised a ship with your muse and ignored you afterwards?

that’s kind of what’s happening rn and im not happy about it. -_-

#( 🌙 OOC! RULER OF THE VOLCANIC DIAMOND PLANET. ✨ )#svmmercmance #/ im not even tryna be shady.......#/ ..... its ok to voice when ur dissatisfied LKGJFLGKD.

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transhoverfish · 4 years

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Hi! I'm not sure if my last ask went through since I sent it on mobile,(If it did i'm sorry for sending another) but I was wondering if you have any tips for writing Subnautica fics?

!! i did see the first ask, i've just been a bit too busy w school to write an answer :o don't worry about sending another one tho!!! i dont mind at all how many times im asked smth as long as it gets me to answer eventually lol!!!

ok so im on lunch rn so im typing this quick sorry for typos or anything or if its incomprehensible or smth lmao

so my main advice would just b like. standard writing advice i think? create outlines for the plot, write down anything u want to add so u dont forget, make sure u know what u want to write when u go to write! ik that can be kinda difficult (in awa ive gone WAY off outline on accident lol. paul was gonna end up in last chapter but i needed to get back on track to the outline so his scenes were cut out!)

if ur trying to stick to canon, i recommend going on the wiki and trying to create a timeline of the game's events! it helped me a lot with setting up survivors, but if ur going way off canon like im doing w awa (or some others like ioWall's and ryttu3k's fics! i greatly recommend their fics for inspo!!!) then its not necessary :o

aaand ALSO lookin at the wiki for hos the fish act is good as well! reapers are supposed to have sonar detection using their roars, but it doesn't act like that in-game! fanfic is a good way to write the creatures the way the game says they should but arent programmed in :o

and also don't forget to have fun!!! the best part of writing fic is to just write what YOU wanna write and go wild with whatever u want!! brainstorm those ideas lads!!! im starting to sound like a teacher oh god look what schools done to me already

ok i think that's about all! its not the best advice, im largely just writing for fun so i have no idea what im doing either!! i like to think most of us don't! so just have fun and feel free to send me more asks if u want to for help!! im pretty sure iowall has a tumblr as well if u want to ask them about their fic :o

#ok i might edit this a bit after school to make it make more sense lol #once again sorry if answering takes a bit longer than usual!! im trying to answer some when i have time qwq #once again ALSO dont feel bad or apologize for resending asks to me! i dont mind at all!! I LOVE U AND APPRECIATE THAT U WANT TO HEAR ME #YELL TJINGS AT YOU!!!!#qwq #OK GOTTA GO NOW #ask

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just-some-random-blogger · 4 years

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December Dates

Seventeen Summary: In the spirit of Christmas, boyfriend!svt is here to take you on a date. Word Count: 3k+ Warnings: Fluff, crackkkkkk, v many typos,etc.

R E Q U E S T

my friend: seventeen + cute

A/N: HO HO HO MERRY CHRISTMAS YOU HOS (jk) HAHAHAHAHAHHA. Also ashdiepl because im writing on a tab, i couldnt add any gifs so aksjemksksmsksksmskskdk alsO im so sorry i dont remember if the request is platonic or nah but kaksksksk this is what u get soz

-----

Alright

So no gifs

Imma just do a header real quick so u know wassap

S. Coups

Das better

hi header

I might delete u later if i get on a pc

But firsT seuNgcheEolL

*deep breath*

Ho u lucky enough to breath the same air he does

N now u are on aa date with him

WoWw

So bf!seungcheol is a cute lil snowflake

Which means he'll buy u an ugly ass Christmas sweater and matching gloves

THAT MATCHES THE ONES HE BOUGHT FOR HIMSELF OFC

then yall go out and play in the powdery snow outside

ImGine seungcheol grabbing yOuR hand

cebAuse u a dumb loser that slips on nothing

Also warmth

pulling your scarf up a bit because he can tell you're getting cold

Then like a gentleman

will pUSH U INTO THE SNOW

AND START A FRICKIN SNOW WAR

HE'll hit ur dumb face he dont care

He'll maKe u wish u Stayed damn home

Rapid fire frikin snow granades man

Course iz all a bita fun

Then he'll let u win

Cause he does care Bout ur dumb Fce

Also he soft for u gross

Then once that's done he'll start laughing

Not because of post-snow ball fight adrenaline

But because he thinks himself so funny

When he busts a lung screaming "dO Ya wana biLd aSNOEMAN!!!!!"

AND THEN U decline and leave him in the snow

"YAAAAA WE HAVE TO BUILD A SNOWMAN THOUGH!" he'll laugh

U literally wana leave him and his annoying ass

U stomp away

He laughs and goes after u

His hot breath is visible

and hits your ear when he comes up and wraps his arms around you from behind

U be like, "listen stupid, u corny af, lets break up"

Seungcheol would pout and kiss ur cheek, "nah, u still owe me hot choco. Break up with me after paying me back."

"Ew, why would i pay u back tho"

"Uh cause if you don't imma do thisss," then he proceeds to shove u into the snow again

"CHOI. SEUNG. CHEEOOOLLLLLLLLLLALAKAKAOKS!"

Ok well i have to cut this here first cos there are 12 boys left

Oh Hi hello u here back to ur regular programme

Jeonghan

Yiz

Unlike cheol

Dis ho not about to get cold 4 u uhm

Leave the cold for someone else

But get warm together

I mean

Wink wINKkkkk

Jk gtfo

This is a wholesome headcanon

Git warm he would gladly

So u know what dat means

CUddlEs

Imagine cuddling jeonghan

BoIii

It's da holidays

Which mean he bout to get dat $$$leep

Of course u dont mind that ur just sleeping in

Gurl if ya do

Let me stress out

If you mind sleeping in and cuddling with yoon jeong han

GUrL

Wathu doin????

AnYWAY

ITz u and him right

Ur in bed reading the novel he got u beforehand right

Look at u looking cute in knit sweater and glasses

EVEN IF U DONT NEED THEM THERE ARE GLZSSES

IM TRYING TO MAKE A SCENE HERE WORK WITH ME

it could be jeonghan's ur using it as a headband shhhh

So like ur sitting down

N beside u its jeonhan v slightly snoring

Right right right

Then ur like "man i want something to eat cause i've been sitting here reading all day"

But also ur always hungry

Cause who isnt tho lol

ANYWAY UR ABOUT TO STZND UP

but jeonghan like a needy ho is like noooooooooooodontgo

N ur like

aww wat a needy ho

"Jeonghan im just gonna get something to eat"

"Eat laterrr, i need u now"

He'll keep his eyes shut and shimmy over

Securing an arm on your hip so u wont go

U roll ur eyes and put your book away on the cabinet next u

"Jeonghan ive literally been next to u since last night. I'm just gonna get something to eat, and 4 u 2!"

He'll flutter his eyes open only to close them and move even closer to place his head on ur lap

"I dont want toooooo"

U roll ur eyes again and shimmy out of his grip

But only to get into his arms and hide your face in his chest

"You're so needy," u note

"Says you who's tangling themselves on me"

"Touché"

Joshua

Okay

Get this

Joshua and gingerbread houses

He probably used to build one growing up

And he has just the person in mind he wants to rekindle the tradition with

Congrats u filthy animal

So he took the liberty of getting allll u and he would need

And so much more

Im talking chocolate bars

Shipped cream

Candy canes

Busicuits

Edible glitter

Gum drops

Shrek 1 2 3 4

Is there a four

Im too lazy to google it

And omg u so special to him he loves u so much

Screw u

He wants to share the love with the carats

So he vlives it all

And at first ur shy

Like what if the joshua stans come 4 u

Ok but in this story yall had already annouce ur relationship

AND EVERYONE HAS NO CHOICE BUT TO BE COOL WITH IT FFS LET UR FAVES DATE WHOEVER THEY WANT ISTG

Joshua is like "noo don be shy they'll all love u"

(':

N ur like ok cos i love u sm

But not like the company sm tho *barfing noises*

So yall build a gingerbread house and do a whole ass tutorial about it

Except u dont

Cause yal are morons and could stop messing up or earing the ingredients along the way

Sorry honey ur morons i dont make the rules

"Stop eating the marshmallows!"

"U literally finished the bowl of mnms tho Joshua!"

"Uh no that was the gingerbread man,"

ANd then u all bicker like children because u are omfl

And it excalates

fooD FIGHT

U smear cream on joshuas face

He sprinkles sprinkles on ur head

U press graham crackers against either of his cheeks and ask him what he is

"A sexy graham sandwich"

"Ew no wrong answer," u reply

Can i just point out that that chocolate syrup stain is never coming off

*cough cough cough moron cough cough*

Jun

Imma bout to yeet

Junhui is also feeling nostalic

super soft super baby

And since he's probably feeling bit homesick somewhere in there

he thinks he can remedy it with a bit of chinese home cooking!!!

And whiney needy cuddles also yay

Moving on so

Will it be good?

Damn straight

itll be fikin delish

Will you try to to help him

Of course u gotta help ur man

But like duh

u have eyes

And seeing him all focus and busy and hot

Is really distracting

So like ur as useful as a broken button to him

He doesnt mind tho

He thinks ur cute

Also lovng the attnstion

But the thing about not helping

Not really

And being distracted by a cutie pie

Is that it's basicaly a disaster ending to happen so like

he's efficiently stirring up so hot stuff right

And ur like "man jun's some hot stuff"

And then BaaaaM

U knock over the damn chopping board with the knife and everything on it

Thank goodness the thing didn't chop through your foot of anything

And jun is like "oHMYGOSH DA HELL R U OK"

"... i- im sorry i knocked over ur potatoes"

"My poTaToeS! Listen rn im glad u didnt chop ur foot off"

Jun sighs and looks at the cubes of taters scattered on the floor

You frown, feeling useless

Both of u pick up ur mess

Jun puts down the kitchen utensils in hand

u picked up the last of the potatoes

"Hey we could always wash those, it's not like the floor is mud or anything, even then , potates came from mud"

"Yeah but im sorry, i wanst really helping in the first place"

Jun smirks, "nonsense! U were feeding my ego! That's enough for me!"

You snort and jun comforts u with a tight embrace

Hoshi

AlrighT fam

I thought of something pretty cute but pretty dumb for hoshi

He's like "imma do something super romantic for Christmas"

So he's like "wear something cute we gon do smth fun" @ u

So u do

U get a cute little red dress just for the occasion

And soonyoung his like "BRO MY GIRL SO SUPER CUTE"

And ur like a blushing mess cause he looks super excited with his big smile and cresent eyss

ahhh Hhh myHOSishiii fealzssmsmmsms

Anyway u think ur gonna go to some cute restaurant right

But hoshi brings u to the mall

To instead join the couples dancing contest

Soonyoung gets super nervouse at ur surprised reaction

He's like, "omg is this a super bad idea i thought it would be cute but like i guess not we dont have to go we could always just drop out"

You laugh and shake ur head, "no it's all good, but i mean like, we don't have a choregraphy, and im not like you who can just break it down."

Soonyoung lets out a breath and chuckles, "nah don't worry. It's not really a compation-competion, and regardless, they're going to show ius a choreo and the couple that best interprets wins a a romantic date for two, fit for a dancing king and queen"

And then u break into a big uwu

"Omg u are super romantic soonyoung"

He struts a pose and chuckles, "i mean, i try"

So you both participate in the contenst

Kinda zumba it out by folling the instructors

Soonyoung is helping you out with your form and explaining to you the steps

He gets a little competative so he doesn't really want to mess us

Up hearing you giggle when you do a s pin breaks his competative spirit

And all he really cares about is having a good time with you

Aleight

But admitedly

He was pretty annoyed when they annouced the winner

Were not the two off you

i mean you lot were the cutest it can gt

Who else could trump that

But then you both saw that the winners were 80 something yesr olds holding hand and looking at each other like the other was their world

and then soonyoung was like "okay valid"

You pout, "aww i hope we end up like that"

Soonyound and you turn to each other

He grins for ear to ear, "then lets go on a romantic date as well"

"I thought you'd never ask"

Wonwoo

LiNda

I hope you're ready for wonwoo

Because i sure as hell am not

So in case youre wondering

Youre crazy I mean youre reading this arent you

Prolly at midnight hi fam

Again i dont make the rules

Well just a btw Almost every

Christmas tradition is pagan

Like the tree

The wreath

And SANTA IS SO CREEPY YALL NEED TO GET UR CHILDREN AWAY FROM HIM

SO MAYbe ur not all that crazy

For not wanting to continue them on

i mean sure u can give new meaning to things

But you wanted none of that

Which was whyyyy you decided to DIY the decorations to your entire house

Nnd who else are you going to do that with other than your loving bb boyfriend wonwoo

Wonwoo doesn't mind

He thinks its cute

Because it is a cute date idea

Youtube tutorials

Pinterest ideas and paper snowflakes and all

Yeah

so wonwoo is there cutting up some of the paper you folded

You're glueing some popsicle sticks

He's water coloring some designs in

Youre pulling on the tape dispenser

It's all going great

"Jagiya... i don't want to sound mean but-"

"They're all ugly as hell. I know Wonwoo."

Wonwoo gives an apologetic look.

For a moment u two dont speak

And then you both brust into laughter

"Aww whatever, lez stick em on!"

And do you get your badly painted slowflakes

Your wolf drawing

"That's a wolf?"

"Duh what else would it be wonwoo?"

The letters that spelled merry chrsitmas

And the doodle cutouts of the seventeen members

in personalized ugly sweaters

And placed them all over the place

You look around basking in the glory of ur craft

Its all very colorful

And crafty

And looking like a child made it

Then like an imbecile

U break into laughter

"It looks like a kindergartener's classroom"

U end up roasting yourself

Making fun of your sloppy handwork

And wonwoo watches u

with adoring eyes

"I almost forgot," wonwoo speaks up and pulls out a piece of paper

You recive it from him and break into a smile

"Is this us?"

Wonwoo snorts, "no its jeonghan hyung in a dress holding my hand sweetheart"

For a moment u believe him

But then he breaks out into laughter

Woozi

Boi imma fite u

Christmas carols

Okay idek why i ended up so serious with wonwoo

But listennup

Im not about to maypke it crackier

so back to christmas carols

Dis boi is about to serande you with a christmas themed love song

So its around 8pm at night

Jihoon has is guitar

and ur just chilling right

and ur on ur phone letting him do his thing

but then from the floor he was sat on

he turns to you on the couch

And pats ur leg

"Yo i just finished my song u wann hesr"

You squeak and jump of the couch next to him

"Duh dummy!"

And he starts singing

He's talking about stars and warmth

He's spittin fire about the smell of hot choco

The he's talking sbout how lame joshua's gingerbread house was

Next thing you know ur crying

because omg that ginger bread houseWAS UGLY

also jihoooooooooooooon just serenaded you

Dont u just

Then jihoon catches you and panicks

"You okay? Why are you cryin?!"

"HowDARS YOU ASK ME THAT LISTEN UP U JUST SAID SOME SWEET WORDS TAKE RESPONSIBILITY!!!!!!!"

JIHOON CALms down

But u crybaby cant stop crying

and of course jihoon panicks again

So he starts singing some other Christmas song

And then u start crying about poor rudolf

And remember regina george

But then eventually you calm down

And decide to nuzzle up against jihoon who replaced his guitar with you in his arms

Then us fall asleep with him sweetly singing about the spirit of Christmas

Liz gittit

Of course this ray of light just wants to give off energy to the world

And since he

And u u forgetful ass

Forgot to go shopping for presents

You decided to go on a dec 24th shopping trip!

Hurrah!

But it was too eady for u two

Like wtf

Gift giving Is suuch and easy task

And shoping a day before Christmas

pshhhhhhh

Its a heartbeat

"Whoever gets the best gifts gets for the best price gets to boss the other around until new year," seokmin grins

You knit your brows deeply at his words

And wonder what the hell he has in plan for him to think of doing something so ensnaring

So being the smarter one in the relationship

"Uh no??"

Seokmin was like "ok then the other has to do whatever the other says for the entirety of Christmas"

"???? Whyyyyy?"

"Because its not challengeing or fun if there isn't any condition" "Ugh fine"

So the two of you zip around looking for the best gifts you could get

You try to stay away from the people doing their last minute shopping

Seokmin doesnt dare go in between an old lady mouthing of another customer

Tbh its super stressful

wtf

what kind of date is this

Only morons would do this wtf

Both of you got shoved constantly

There wasnt really much space to move around

And there wasnt really anything to choose from

But hey guess what

Seokmin found some really cool gifts

"Daheck did u get that shirt?"

"Isle five. There were a bunch of people grabbing some stuff and this fell to the ground and so i picked it up and thought it was pretty cool"

You on the other hand got like ok gifts

I mean theyre not bad

But da hell did dk get a frikin eeyore onesie idek

It was no contest.

Seokmin defo won

"Yisss so i win therefor u have to make me some Christmas cookies tomorrow"

"U ho did u really just make me suffer through that so you could ask me to make cookies 4 u???"

"Yes but we really didn have gifts tho."

U roll ur eyes

Seokmin's face falls, "r... r u like mad @ me?"

"Uhhhhhhhhhh"

You knit your brows at him but release a smile when u see his nervous look

"No babo. Im jusy tired, lezgo back home"

He sighs and nods, kissing your cheeks

"Dont worry baby, ill carry all of this back home"

Which he does

And when u get back

He says he forgot something in the car

then comes bzck

And then forcefully turns u around

Ur about to protest

But the you realize he's putting on a silver necklace on u

"Yahhhh seokminie, u shouldnt have. Where you even get this"

"I bought it a while back, duh" he chuckles then kisses you on the cheek

"Merry christmas jagi"

Mingyu

You are a genius for getting boyfriend like mingyu

uh and super lucky like fu--

BUT TODAY

Ur extra glad that mingyu is 10ft tall

Because ur going to be decorating your very own tree

Wow

You bought he prettiest glass ornamnets

and the sparkliest streamers

"I have a vision," u explain

Mingyu nods in understanding

U and him lift the tree into the living room

And then u start decorating the tree from the bottom up

Its all rly chill

You lot are chatting about whatever

He's tellling you about ur tour n stuff

U put on some Christmas tunes for flare

And then u stand up from the floor and boogey with each other

Yall shake ur butts

and go around the tree wrapping it in tinself

Mingyu steals one of the ornaments from u

and u try to take it back from him like the genius u are

Except hes holding it over his head

N u cant for the life of u reach his hand up there

So u step on his foot

And punch his stomach

And he bends down in reaction

In pain

Soz

He was asking for it

U steal the decor back

Then he proceeds to chase u around because aparently ur the bully

*instert pikachu meme here*

N then u get back towork

Or i mean take a break

And u eat a bunch of holiday special junk

And then u get back to work

"ok nows for the star"

U hand him the star because its the entire point of his existance

getting that star up ther

with his longass arms

He turns to u "u dont wanna put it"

BOI

u suck in a breath

"I cant frIKICN REACH IT U LIL"

He give a face, "there are ways"

"My go-- just put the AHHHHHHH"

AND THEN THE NEXT THING U KNOW

Hes crouching down pulling ur legs on his shoulders

"MINGYU PUT ME DOWN" you say, about to rip of his face

Mostly because u have nothi to hold onto

but he stands

with u on his shoulders

and walks to the tree

"Put the damn thing on before u fall!!"

Wow its ur fault again

And screaming u put the star on

And mingyu putz u down

"Okay that was stressful"

U punch him in the gut again

The8

Minghao is super tired

But super looking forward to spending time with u

So u defintely go on a date

But its of the lazy movie watch variety

Im talking all the chesey romance movies

Set in december

that has like mistletoe kisses

And snow scenes

And also those holiday specials

For catroons

And non cartoons

Even the one with arnold swartzimacallit

You pull out the laptop

And get on netflix

There's popcorn on

And hot tea

Or whatever the hell

Its all just very warm

and u and minghao are wrapped together in a warm blanket

Ur nestled in between is legs and ur super warm and cozy and im so soft bleh

"Oh oh, u should see this part, its my fav--"

But u stop uourself when u turn and see minghao fell asleep

U coo and let him obvi

taking unflattering pictures duh

But also cute ones because

#couplegoals

He doesn't sleep through all the movies though

You end up watching non christmas themed films too

Like toy story4

OKAY I CRIED AT THE ENDING

PIXAR IS REALLY COMING FOR MY WIG

"You look really cute cuddled up against me" he'll randomly blurt

U feel ur cheeks brun at that

but no he cant have that

"I thought i was always cute"

He chuckles and groans as he hugs u tightly

U laugh at his reaction

"Of course you're always cute"

"Ok but the teddy bear u got me is actually cuter"

"Nononono, the teddy is cute but uuu are cuter"

"Were u always this gross?"

Seungkwan

Okay

before u tell me these are getting worse and worse every passing member

i would first like to say i know

and that seungkwan bought u a cute dress for Christmas

and took u to a fancy restaurant

Ok ur welcome

But like even if it werent fancy

U'd still like it

cause holy guacamole

imagine holding seungkwans hand as u walk around

Jsut being so head over heels

and super in love with the cutie

Groooossss

LinDA

The feeling is mutual for him when he's around u

so he stops mid conversations

just to take ur pic

Its kinda annoyig

but kinda cute

"Hey unknow hansol told me about-- what are u doing"

"No go on, im just talking ur picture"

Literally the bst hype man alive

Will make take dozen upon dozen photos of u

And will make u pose for aethetics

He will go on making sure everyone knows u da hottest ho in the place

n ur like "seungkwan stfu u embarrassssing meee"

And then oml

Some moron tries to hit on u

and seungkwan sqwares up ready to hit a fool

would he actually do it i mean

prolly Not

but then again he looked really mad

So u calm him down

and u go bzck home

And the cuddles

"Baby girl im sorry if i embarrassed u"

"Nah itz chill i mean i know u have good intentions"

U smile and he takes another candid phto of u

"Broooooo!!"

"Im donnnr. Now hows about we get rid of that dress"

Vernon

okay im willing to guess hansol loves drinking hot chocolate in the winter

So he's like

"Lets do a hot choco review"

And buys 897 types of hot choco

Or like ten

wtf eight hundres pluss is too much

So ur like okay i like hot choco

and then he pulls out his phone and does a vlive

"No i am not jealous of joshua hyungs vlive with his gf"

Yall make like ten cups of hot choco

and is chaotic

Idek how u could get injured

But hey

It wasnt even the hot water invovled

but the wrapping of the choco powder

"Technical difficulties hansol is a big moron"

U get him a bandaid

"Ya! I am not"

Yall start reviewing anyway

*insert try guys eugenes voice*

Im rihght

Ur wong

Shut up

After trying the first onw

Ur like wow dis is good

the second was even better

The third one u hold

then u realized there were eight more cups

And that u made so

much

so u were like "omf there is too much "

then u debated whether or not calling seventeen to drink the rest

But then hansol was like "ther isnt enough for themm"

Then ur like

"okay whatabout making a super hotchoco"

n vernon was like

????

"THATS THE BEST IDEA UVE EVVER HAD"

SO YALL GET A BIGASS POT

MIX THE REST IN

REALIZE U HAVENT RATED THE other cups

Shrug it off

and get a cup of the hot choco mix

"Tastes like corn"

"Bish dafaq"

Dino

Yikes

Chan is a dumb ho

and got himself sick at Christmas so

nononoono thats a no to any cute date ideas

and its just you and him staying at home

U personally dont mind

but hes like "awww but i had so many ideas"

but obvi U cant risk him getting any sicker than he already is

So you stay home and take care of him

and all he can do is complain about everything

about the cold

his runny nose

The lack of taste of the food

His head ache

The fact his bed is hot

And that fact that u have to take care of him

And treat him like a baby

"I am not a baby"

"Listen up, u are always gonna be my baby"

"Not u toooooo najsjsjjs"

You make him some hot cocoa

And hes like "im not drinking that if u call me baby again"

"Babybabybabybabybaby"

Ugghgg "If you keep doing that im not going to give u the gift i gotchu"

"Well das on u"

And then u end up going ona glaring contest

Chan ends up giving it to u anyway

"i hope u choke on it" he grumbles with insencerity

U coo when u see that its a handwritten letter

And then u end up crying because hes super soft

N ur super soft

And gahhh u love him so much

Chan pats ur back because he doesnt want to get u sick if he hugs u

U sniffle and wipe ur eyes

"Who's the baby now, cry baby"

You snarl and pinch his side

And now i say

This was probably hecking bzd but i hope u enjoyed

merry CHRISTMAS

ITS MY FABORITE HOLiDAY

TAKE CARE Of urselves mwaah

Support me on ko-fi

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adam-is-suffering · 4 years

Text

Homestuck Day 11 ------ part 2

Dialogues are so long you can tell theres a big difference in length between this post and the one before it jesus christ

Anyways

Its Dave. Missed you, my guy.

Even if its been like idk, 15 pages, I still missed my homie.

Indulge him, John. This happens every single time. You always ignore his attempts at getting your attention 😔

John you literally joked about ending the world and there being a meteor named after you before you knew it was literally going to happen, so I don’t exactly expect Dave to believe you

John: Dude you don’t even believe me about my current situation and you don’t even care that Im in trouble smh fake friend

Also John: Im not actually going to talk to you about it, and I will evade every conversations with you whenever the topic finally gets discussed because Im busy, so technically you have no idea whats going on currently and I havent explained it so I just expect you to believe my one sentence of “Im getting blown up” even after joking about it ok bye

John is getting blown up and Dave is like, huh perfect time to rap about this

Which is the obvious response. What friend would you be if you didn’t do this?

Oh god oh fuck, he’s going off, he really did it, he’s really rapping about the end of the world and there’s no stopping this kid shit ah shit its the end for us oh god oh fuck

Is this what its like to be friends with a soundcloud rapper?

Dave what?

Dave, thats gay

Thats not how typos work dave, because since youre writing it still, you can.. Fix it...

Wait, is... he comparing them to Jesus?

Im not even sure this is english

Huh

Can I just say something?

Dave knows the cast of Armageddon and their roles a little too well in this rap. Because I kinda don’t remember the plot of Armageddon even having watched it, and I honestly completely forgot that Steve Buscemi was in the fucking thing in the first place, so honestly. I’m not saying Dave watched it but I want to believe he did. Either John made him, John talked about it so much to the point where Dave had to know what the hell he was talking about with the references (which also brings in the point that perhaps John talked about it so much that Dave knows the whole plot already from just that - more likely) OR he watched it ironically bc it was “bad”. But no matter the reason, I’m pretty sure after knowing John and his interests, Dave probably watched it at SOME point in time and then continued to talk about it bc he knows John likes it despite saying its for “irony”.

Aight lit, thats my hot take. Thats my headcanon. And with that, I’m out.

I stand with what I previously said.

I hope this is still part of the rap, or he’s just doing a rapping monologue.

You know, Dave’s kind of great ngl

Dave’s not even subtle in his desire to talk with John

Also IM RIGHT, you see. Dave doesn’t even know wtf is going on because John Doesnt Fucking Talk To Him Unless Its About His Movies

No wonder hes whipped, and rapping about said movies

Soulless fucking John Im telling you

They’re really doing Dave dirty in the first acts of Homestuck, huh

Kid can’t even defend himself

Rose highjacked a car before, I’m like 100% certain of this

IM LAUGHING MY FUCKING ASS OFF

Rip the car

Another retcon. Ill figure it out one day, Hussie. I fucking will. Watch me.

Im real sus

Im starting to feel so fucking bad for Dave, this kid is just getting shitted on left and right lmfao

AHA

I was getting bored of the red, purple and blue

Johns not gonna explain one bit of it, is he?

What did I FUCKING say

Wait. Does the dog fucking TALK???????????

She’s taking this rather smoothly for someone who just said they lost their car in a bottomless pit

“I can’t talk right now, Dave, I’m busy. I can’t explain jackshit to you bc itll take too long and I already gave u the basis. Oh? Whats this? Jade? Lol here lemme give you my whole life story”

Why does everyone fucking hate Dave?

I DONT GET IT???

I get he raps, but like.. we all have that one friend doesnt mean u gotta ignore :/

Im surprised John hasnt snapped yet from all this stress, I wonder how much he’s bottling in.

Oh. Okay. Okaokaok. So Jade is one of those Im so cute personality types but actually likes heavy metal and listening to murder podcasts on the down low, isnt she?

Honestly ngl, the cute but will murder you type characters are usually the most interesting to me.

I mean. thats just me being a slut for character tropes 😔

Jesus, John, just ask him, I’m pretty sure he’d do anything if you just said smth about it

I can’t wait for someone to respect Dave Strider and his pining smh, but honestly itll only happen with one person and that person will most likely be Jade Harley bc she doesnt see the worst in anybody and thats why Im liking her rn

Rose will call bullshit and John just doesnt give a fuck

N e ways. When are we getting dialogues that arent exclusively with John?

#I basically chucked like two whole pages of dialogue in one fucking post and its so long #homestuck #homestuck liveblog #day 11

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crush-suggest · 5 years

Note

oh god i sent that public!! if u wanna just copypaste it w/o my username under this msg pls do!!! - roommate anon

hey i'm the roommate anon! i have an update. ots been a week and every night but one night we have ended up sleeping in the same bed. the typos r because shes holding me like a koala rn! we also are always saying ilu to eachpther, holding hands and kissing on the cheek. but because of how girls tend to be im not sure if shes leaning more romantic or if shes just like this. weve already talked about our feelings twive with no solid understanding of what it is, should i bring it up again or wait?

ANOTHER ROOMMATE UPDATE- me and my crush are a thing! we arent labeling it because shes a bit anxious because its her first relationship, let alone not a straight one, so i cant really tell anyone but omg!!! i'm so surprised and grateful this went so well!

YESSS HI ROOMMATE ANON!! im so sorry this took so long to get to-- ive been busy lately. but man im so happy to hear about these updates!! im soo happy everything turned out so well, too! i had a ton of hope for this when u first messaged me about it, and im so glad everything went great!! 💓💓💓

#asks #anonymous #YAAAA I LOVE THIS!! IM LIVING!!

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itsjesperfahey · 5 years

Text

okay so now that i’ve wrapped my head around there being a six of crows/shadow and bone trilogy netflix tv show, i wanted to share some of my thoughts on it:

as y’all can see from my two previous posts on the subject im HELLA excited. bottom line, i cannot WAIT for this. i trust Leigh will force netflix to give this adaptation at least some of the quality it deserves. but imma just say a few things rn:

- my main issue is how theyre gonna handle the plot of the show. in terms of like, timeline, what story they’ll follow, how things will pan out. like is this an ENTIRELY NEW STORY that takes place after crooked kingdom that’ll allow all characters from the grishaverse to co-exist? will it be the books in chronological order, switching povs of characters from both stories? thats a bit much no? or following tgt, and then switch to soc in season 4? im assuning the first season (8 episodes) is purely for shadow and bone, as thats what its been titled so far (according to the article leigh tweeted), but i could be wrong

- what i DONT think is that theyre trying to cram tgt + soc duology into the 8 episodes, which is what i see people saying on here constantly. THEY ARENT TRYING TO CRAM ALL 5 BOOOKS IN 8 EPISODES. netflix series often have multiple seasons. im sure this wont be different. they would be insane to even attempt that.

- pls cast people accordingly (though im not super worried about this, knowing how much leigh is on our side with this matter)

- a lot of you say you didnt like tgt and that since the show is (presumably) starting off with following this series, its going to be a bad show, and get cancelled. but like. lol. first off. just cause you didnt like it doesnt mean other people wont. just cause you didnt like it doesnt necessarily mean its an objectively bad thing. and second. you vastly underestimate how the general public often LOVES any type of magical story with love triangle and pasty white boys. its MUCH easier to get someone into a tv show than a book. its a lot less commitment. you can leave a tv show on while youre chatting or cooking or something. you can’t do that with a book. it would have to be a really REALLY awful show to not pull a good enough portion of the unassuning general public (and again, i trust leigh won’t let it be that bad or at least i hope lol)

- im scared about kaz and how they’ll properly portray his trauma and personality and views on inej WITHOUT some sort of internal monolgue system (i.e his inner voice). its such a big part of kaz to be abe to hear his thoughts, i hope they find a way to do it

- i hope they don’t change kaz and inej’s relationship (i.e make them kiss or something lol)

- wylan and kuwei in ck??? will kuwei’s actor just play both roles the entire time wylan looks like kuwei? will it be cgi? idk

- i dont want to see live action matthias *** uGH

- i hope the magic doesnt look too too crummy

- @lips-and-literature brought up a good point on how SO much happens in crooked kingdom as opposed to soc, to s&b. the inej rescue, the grisha hunters, dunyasha, nina relearning her powers, the arc with colm fahey, the gangs, wylans mom, and so much more. whereas in soc it was just “we need to break into the ice court” and then they do it, and the book ends with “we broke into the ice court”. hopefully by the time soc’s season comes around, the episode count will be the usual 12-22 instead of 8. but that also depends on the episode length

- please let this be good i love my murder babies and alina starkov and i dont want them ruined. im hoping for the best dont let me down leigh

thats kinda it for now but i’ll maybe add more later. sorry for any !typos, my computer lags a lot on tumblr and the text shows up a minute after im done typing it. send me any asks if u want me to elaborate/say some more

#soc #six of crows #tgt #the grisha trilogy #grishaverse #grishaverse tv #ck #crooked kingdom #s&b #leigh Bardugo #the dregs #mine #mine.txt #long post

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soonhoonsol · 4 years

Note

Okay done for now -rant anon

oops

(1) Okay so, I'm from Denmark. Aka I'm white. Which means apparently that I inherently have no culture. And that's what I'm sick of. I'm sick of people disregarding and disrespecting the culture we have. I so often hear "white people have no culture" "you're white stop acting like you have culture" and I'm sick of it. Danish culture and danish history is wildly mistreated everywhere in the world. People wear "Viking" helmets that have horns when that's wrong. Those were rarely (very rarely) used and

(2) Only for ceremonies, like weddings(if you were super special) or some special rituals for the gods. Horns were mainly for drinking, which, when you cheered it was important you banged the horns hard enough together that a bit of you drink spilled into everyone drink and vice versa. This was to avoid anyone poisoning the drinks (as they would have to drink it too) which is also why you start every meal with cheering and why it's super rude (like deadass you will be scolded) if you cheers with an

(3) Empty cup or if you don't drink immediately after. And don't get me started on what marvel gas done to our mythology, how they have morphed and twisted the stories into something unrecognisable. Thor and Loki are not brother. Loki and Odin are blood brother, meaning Loki is Thor's blood father. Thor's wives is supposed to have the longest golden hair as she is the goddess for harvest. Everything is wrong with the marvel interpretation. Everything. And people depicting Jörmungandr as a serpent

(4) Or even a dragon when it's a worm. A huge worm. Child of Loki btw, which many don't know and wrongfully say it's some random elder beast when that's wrong. And people not realising that just because white people don't have "flashy" "exotic" or otherwise "outthere" culture doesn't mean we have none. Our societies are just as coloured by culture as any other ethnicity and I'm so done with apologising for being born in a notheren country.

(5) We have just as much history and culture as any other countrym and don't get me started on the "yeah but your history is enslaving other countries" fuck that. First off, we didn't enslave entire countries, we got slaves. YES GOT. Slaves were used in trades by everyone. We sold danish slaves, English slaves Irish slaves everyone could be a slave. The slaves gotten from Africa were mostly giving in trade by chieftains (aka they were already slaves, usually war slaves from attacking other tribes)

(6) Every culture in the entire history of humankind has taken slaves, from their own people and from other countries. In so done with people ignoring history just because America is that one loud child ™. As if being loud means your argument is valid. As if Americans aren't one of the biggest changers of history (aka they just write what they want). Like for god's sake, Denmark is a kingdom, we have traditions for watching the new years and the queen's prepares a speak. Our military regularly holds

(7) flight shows and other exercits for the queen and the countrym we literally have the oldest and the first flag in the world. First and oldest theme park in the world. the longest unbroken chain of monarchy in europe and even aome parts of asia. we are so much more than just white people without culture. just because some people are loud doesnt mean theyre valid. and dont get my started on braids and hairpins. apparently its wrong and racist to ca african braids and asian hairpins but when people

(8) ca dane braids and hairpins its okay and just " a normal braid you cant claim that" excuse you but normal dkesnt exist across cultures like that. ove seen people wear ceremonial warrior and ritual braids only recorded in dane history and call them normal and fashionable. like no, at keast, at the very least. recognise that those are not your culture's braids and that you dont have an inherent right to wear them. if you can do it for the africans why not for the rest of us.

(9) and ive seen people calling danes racist and say we ca when wearing hairpins when theyre a part of our history too. they arent exclusive to parts if asia, they were used by our ancestors too, in different ways, and different styles than im asia. we have a right to wear them too. -fuuny rant anon (more like angry rn) (lowkey dinoe but still upset) (also there's so many typos I'm so sorry)

(10) Oh and also. Not saying Vikings invested braids. Braids have been used everywhere and no one can claim the invention since it has appeared independently in multiple cultures. However people wear Viking style braids for fashion when those braids were for actual warriors, ready to join Valhalla. Young boys still learning to fight couldn't wear them. Some braids were only for significant fights, others were for rituals. Also getting back to something else that bothers me. Vikings weren't all warrio

(11) Rs. In fact, the word Viking wasn't even used until later. Danes or Norsemen were mostly farmers and merchants. Only a handful were warriors (as any country should have a decent fighting force in case of enemies) I'm sick of the Viking age being depicted as a while society of bloodthirsty men and boring women, when that's such a minor part of that time. Also women were allowed to fight as much as any man, they even held more power than men in some household or otherwise they were equal. We had

(12) equality between genders with women being in charge of economics, often gifted daggers in presents and even encouraged to cut of the jewels of any man rhat attempted to rape them. they would even sometimes hang these in their houses to discourage strangers from making the same mistake. in just. So done. So sick. So tired. Of people disregarding and generalising all white people as having the same lack of culture

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

okie so there’s a lot to unpack here. i just wanted to put a disclaimer here that i’m not very familiar with your culture so i apologize beforehand if i say anything offensive.

i think people just lump so many different races into “white”, which tbh is kind of dumb. and you’re right, every country has its own culture. it’s ignorant people that act like that doesn’t exist.

i wanna point out that you are not your ancestors!! you are NOT responsible for things they did.

i’m not exactly sure about the Marvel aspect because idrk what people say about Thor and Loki, but from what you mentioned it seems to be the main trigger for this rant? please correct me if i’m wrong

but yes, again to reiterate, you are NOT your ancestors. you should not be blamed for things they did. and for people who just ignore white culture, or more specifically Danish culture in this case, walk away from them. like, for real just walk away from them. if they’re not going to open their minds to at least find out a bit about the history, then they’re not worth talking to at all.

screw those ignorant people. they’re not worth it at all.

#askchey #anonymous #funny rant anon #did not know the read more doesnt work without smtg above it oops

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phandomsecretvalentines · 6 years

Text

Tell Me Everything Will Be Alright

This is my fic (and my first phanfic wow) for the 2018 Phandom Secret Valentines, and my valentine is @citrouillephan!

I hope you enjoy! -from your valentine, @realityfallsapart

tags: fluff, angst, 2009 AU

words: 4.7k

Summary: Dan Howell tends to get lost in his head and his thoughts have a habit of ruling him even when he doesn’t want them to. When he and his best friend finally have a chance at meeting, Dan starts to wonder if he is actually good enough for the amazing human being that is Phil Lester.

(ao3 link)

(Thank you so much to @moonbeamphan for reading this over and helping me! This wouldn’t be as good without you!)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dan typed his answer and sent it by hitting enter before leaning back in his chair and letting out a shaky breath that seemed to rattle his insides. His laptop chirped quietly, announcing that Phil had replied to him. He couldn’t bring himself to look at it right away. Finally, after a few moments, he flicked his eyes down to the white screen of the computer in his lap where Phil’s most recent message seemed to glare up at him.

Phil :) (9:47 PM)

i know!

i can’t believe it either!

For a few moment, Dan could do nothing but stare at the screen; at the black words disrupting the artificial white light. It was the only thing that gave Dan any sort of illumination in his room; everything else was dark. He bit his lip and thought about the possible pros and cons of shutting his laptop and burying his head under his duvet to pretend that everything was fine because it was. It’s all fine.

Dan shook his head and reached his hands down to the keyboard. He wouldn't—couldn’t—do that to Phil. Phil deserved so much better than that. His numb fingers typed out a small sentence, only realizing that it had several typos until after he had sent it. He mentally kicked himself for it.

Dan ^-^ (9:51 PM)

Me niether! it seems like thsi would n e v e r happen!

**neither, this

Jeez i can spell

Phil :) (9:51 PM)

idk dan are you sure you can def spell? those seem like some pretty beginner mistakes…

Dan knew Phil was kidding. He knew that it was just Phil playing around with Dan like they normally did. Like they had been doing for months at this point. But in Dan’s heightened state of anxiety and stress, he couldn’t help but berate himself further. God, Phil must think of him as a kid now, he can’t even spell right!

Dan crashed back into his mattress, groaning and squeezing his eyes shut.

“Stupid, stupid, stupid….” he muttered, hitting his forehead with his hand with every word.

Looking back on this moment, Dan would laugh and realize how utterly idiotic his anger with himself was coming from, but right now, in bed with the lights off and by himself, he couldn’t help but magnify the issue. He had been anxious and stressed without a pause this entire week.

He looked up at his ceiling, sighing in growing frustration towards himself, but it wasn’t just because of his inability to catch his typos. In fact, it had nothing to do with them. The typos had just tipped him right over the edge and all of his insecurities crashed over him like waves, his head nearly going under the tide.

To say he wasn’t good enough was an understatement. To say that Phil deserved a much better best friend than Dan was even more of one. Phil was older, more experienced, more mature, funny, smart, kind, and extremely compassionate. He had a great time making pretty successful and entertaining videos (at least in Dan’s opinion, and he would always fight anyone who said otherwise) on the side, on top of balancing life. Dan was younger, so much more less experienced with everything, he got overwhelmed with life and spent the majority of his time curled up under his covers surfing through the waves of his latest existential crisis or playing PC video games that he would forget about within the next 24 hours. He was purgatory in the form of a human and an incredibly underwhelming one at that.

He wasn’t sure how long exactly he laid there, stewing in his self-deprecation and wishing that he was better. Better in literally every aspect, maybe then he would finally be worth Phil’s time, if only a little bit. His computer chirped again, and then twice more minutes later in rapid succession, as if angry. Dan grasped for the thing, pulling it up to his chest, lacking the energy to sit back up.

Phil :) (10:07 PM)

Dan you know im joking right?

Phil :) (10:16 PM)

Dan? you still there? i was joking i promise you can make all the typos you want

u didnt fall asleep did you?

Dan couldn’t help the watery smile that turned the corners of his mouth up, albeit it being a small one. Phil had that effect on him even if Dan was falling apart on the inside. Just a little though, he was fine.

Dan ^-^ (10:18 PM)

nooo im not sleeping

Phil :) (10:18 PM)

Dan ^-^ (10:19 PM)

why the frowny face

Dan tried to keep the fear out of his thoughts but the talons of doubt had already settled around his heart. Was Phil mad that he didn’t answer right away? Would-

His laptop signaled the arrival of Phil’s reply, and Dan really didn’t know if he wanted to slam the lid of his computer shut or jump at the opportunity to find out if he had just ruined the best friendship he had ever had. Ever will. He went for the latter.

(Dan supposed he might be overreacting, but then again, when wasn’t he, it seemed?)

Phil :) (10:20 PM)

did i insult your typing skills one too many times? is that why you disapeared?

*disappeared

Dan used the best coping mechanisms for dealing with his anxiety that he knew: humor and avoidance. Together, they were a formidable force and Dan had spent a large majority of his time perfecting their potency.

Dan ^-^ (10:20 PM)

now look who’s making the typos

Phil :) (10:20 PM)

Dan.

He gulped. Now he had done it. Fuck. He had to fix this.

Dan ignored the roar behind his ears that seemed to be screaming that he should just ignore this all, pray that things would magically fix themselves and change the topic. That was his fear talking. His self-abandonment. His anxiety. His everything. Phil was worth so much more. So Dan pushed it all away for just long enough to reply.

Dan ^-^ (10:21 PM)

sorry, joke

no, thats not why i ran away

i was just thinking, thats all

Phil :) (10:21 PM)

were you doing it again

Dan tried to pretend that he didn’t know what Phil was talking about and simultaneously cursed himself for telling Phil about his increasing habit for getting lost in his thoughts. He failed. He knew exactly what Phil was talking about.

Back, about three weeks ago in a later-than-normal conversation where all of their inhibitions seemed to dissipate, Dan had finally come clean about how sometimes thoughts got the best of him. He would crumble under them, get so completely and utterly lost in his head that he would sometimes stay there for hours on end, picking apart anything that his conscience decided to dig up. And it hindered Dan, made him hate himself just that much more, made him hate how easily his anxieties held him hostage, stuck. But he couldn’t do much about it, it seemed, for whenever he got lost in his head, he always forgot that he had to get out.

Dan gulped. He had to lie his way out of this. He knew that Phil didn’t like it when Dan got stuck. He could pull off nonchalance, right?

Dan ^-^ (10:22 PM)

Phil :) (10:22 PM)

im not convinced

you were werent you

Dan ^-^ (10:23 PM)

does my word not count for anything lol

Phil :) (10:24 PM)

maybe if we were talking and i could see your face it’d count

Dan ^-^ (10:24 PM)

what’s my face got to do with anything?

Phil’s bubble appeared on the screen once, twice, three times, before he apparently decided on what he was going to say and sent it. The entire time Dan was a few words away from having a breakdown. His hands were shaking. His mind was racing faster than normal. Faster than it had in what seemed like a very long time.

Phil :) (10:26 PM)

bc then i could tell if you were lying

tho rn i dont even need that

Dan ^-^ (10:26 PM)

are u seriously saying im lying

Phil :) (10:27 PM)

yeah

you did everything that you always do when you arent telling the truth

you joked

changed / focused the conversation onto smth else

and besides

ive gathered that you really dont like to talk about the things that bother you. you like to ignore them and stuff

Dan ^-^ (10:28 PM)

so how bout we not talk about them then

Phil :) (10:29 PM)

normally, maybe

but not with this

Dan ^-^ (10:29 PM)

and why not?

Phil :) (10:29 PM)

bc i dont like it when you beat yourself up in your head

Dan ^-^ (10:30 PM)

who said i was beating myself up in my head

Phil :) (10:30 PM)

… dan :/

youre avoiding again

Dan cursed himself. God, since when could Phil read him like a book?

Dan ^-^ (10:32 PM)

fine. maybe i am

what are you gonna do about it philly?

Phil :) (10:32 PM)

daaaaannnnnn

you arent allowed to beat yourself up

no ones allowed to

especially you!

Dan giggled, just a little. He couldn’t help it when Phil was being…well, Phil.

Dan ^-^ (10:33 PM)

and why not? Hmm?

Phil :) (10:34 PM)

bc youre my favorite person silly

my favorite person cant be sad. its just the rules

Dan ^-^ (10:35 PM)

oh yeah? whose rules then, oh wise philip

Phil :) (10:35 PM)

ew dont call me philip my nan calls me that

and theyre my rules

my rules for my favorite person

Dan ^-^ (10:35 PM)

suuurrreee phil. sure its a rule

*philip

Phil’s cursor didn’t appear seconds after Dan had sent his message like usual. Insead, nothing appeared. Their good-natured banter had eased the storm raging inside of Dan and his thoughts and anxieties had died down a little, much more easier to bear with the distraction Phil was giving him, but with the sudden disappearance of his best friend, they came back full force. All of his doubts spilled into the front of his conscience. He shivered. It wasn’t from the cold.

Dan watched the little digital clock at the bottom of his laptop screen count the minutes falling away. One, two, three, four, five, god did what did he do-

Phil :) (10:41 PM)

[multimedia image: click to load]

With his heart in his throat, Dan clicked, and a small window appeared, momentarily covering their chat from Dan’s view. It was hard to make out, the quality bad and the image itself grainy and dark, but it was of a piece of paper lying atop two legs clad in bright pyjamas that Dan could immediately connect to Phil and his eccentric personality. He could make out the tip of Phil’s finger at the top of the shot, too. Squinting, he looked at the paper itself, zooming in to make out the words penned in Phil’s handwriting.

Rules:

1. Dan Howell is my favorite person

2. No one is allowed to make fun of him

3. ESPECIALLY if that “no one” is Dan himself

Dan started to laugh. Only Phil would actually make a list of “rules”. Only Phil.

Before Dan could reply, Phil was typing again.

Phil :) (10:43 PM)

there. proper rules written on proper paper. you have to follow them now

Dan ^-^ (10:44 PM)

i cant believe that you actually wrote rules you spork

but fine! i guess if i have to lol

Dan was still working heavily with avoiding the whole situation entirely, just like with what he was doing to the problem causing him so much stress to begin with, but he couldn’t help it. It’s just how he was.

Phil :) (10:46 PM)

so you admit to your crimes xD

but anyways

you were stuck in your head again

which is okay, i mean, i understand that it’s something you cant help

Dan felt like he was going to cry. Phil’s assurance that Dan’s mind running in panicked circles was perfectly okay was almost too much. Phil’s compassion was almost too much.

But it appeared that Phil wasn’t done, because his laptop dinged quietly again.

Phil :) (10:47 PM)

can i ask whats got you so sad and worried

so i can beat it up

obvs

Now Dan really wanted to cry. How could he tell Phil that the reason was him? How could he say that the root of this ball of anxiety and stress and worrying that had taken over him was Phil himself?

He couldn’t do that to Phil, not when his best friend would undoubtedly take it hard. God, if Phil knew why Dan kept getting lost in himself, he would be crushed.

Dan ^-^ (10:51 PM)

noooo

Phil :) (10:51 PM)

are you sure? i wont judge you dan, i swear it doesnt matter if you think i wont like it

i just wanna be here for you

If Dan wasn’t crying earlier, he was now, a few select tears dripping down his cheeks, brimming with the emotions that had been taking over him this past week. Phil was…too much. He was too kind, too sweet, too undeserving of someone like Dan. God, Phil deserved the whole world, he shouldn’t have to settle with Dan.

Another message appeared on Dan’s screen, as but this one didn’t seem like normal, it was a little off, a little rushed, a little…something. Dan couldn’t place it.

Phil :) (10:53 PM)

bc youre my best friend.

obvs. xD

If Dan wasn’t so out of it and was able to think clearly, he might have questioned Phil’s “clarification” of why and what sense he wanted to be there for him, but Dan was not in the best state of mind and he thought nothing of it.

Dan looked at his screen again. He still had to acknowledge Phil’s question, and he wasn’t sure how to go about it. He wanted to tell Phil he already told him everything, have Phil reassure him and tell him that everything was going to be okay again, like he normally did. But Dan couldn’t. He couldn’t lie again, once was already once too many, and something told Dan that if he tried to ignore it or change the topic, Phil would just call him out again.

Fuck.

Dan ^-^ (10:56 PM)

it doesnt matter

Phil :) (10:56 PM)

yes it does

its enough to make you get lost in that head of yours, so it matters

Dan ^-^ (10:57 PM)

phil we both know it doesnt take much for me to get lost in my thoughts

Phil :) (10:58 PM)

still

something is bothering you and i want to fix it

Dan bit his lip. God, Phil had no idea how badly he wanted to let him fix this. He couldn’t though. He just couldn’t.

Dan ^-^ (10:58 PM)

nooo phil, you cant fix this one

Phil :) (10:58 PM)

>:(

you cant even let me try?

Always, always, but just not with this. Dan couldn’t tell Phil this, not when it would hurt him.

Dan ^-^ (11:00 PM)

no phil, not with this sorry :(

Phil :) (11:01 PM)

:((((

okay

i may not like it but i can respect that

will you tell me tomorrow?

Dan looked at the screen, thinking about it. Tomorrow was what he was worried about to begin with. Could he tell Phil tomorrow? He wasn’t sure. Well, it didn’t matter if things went good or not, Dan mused, tomorrow Dan’s fears would either be affirmed or destroyed.

He could only hope.

Dan ^-^ (11:03 PM)

sure

tomorrow

Phil :) (11:03 PM)

yay!!!

Dan laughed, breathily.

Phil :) (11:03 PM)

oooh! look at the time!

its getting so late bear wow

guess we should get to sleep so we dont fall asleep on each other tomorrow huh? xD

Dan’s heart physically melted at the use of Phil’s pet name for him. He only used it occasionally, but it never failed to make Dan’s heart stutter in his chest and the butterflies in his belly to flit around faster, making him feel almost giddy. Hopeful.

God he sounded so stupid right now. Anxious and stressed out of his mind yet still acting like a little kid with their first crush.

Stupid feelings.

Dan ^-^ (11:05 PM)

yeah i guess we should!

night philly :)

Phil :) (11:05 PM)

goodnight dan!! :D

see you tomorrow!

(ps, idk whats bothering you and thats okay but i hope whatever it is it works out for you :“) )

Ah yes. That’s what it boiled down to. Tomorrow morning Dan would board a train and take it up to Manchester to spend some time with Phil. The first time that they would see each other in real life, not just behind a computer screen. They had skyped before and texted and chatted for countless hours over countless days, but the thought of tomorrow still made Dan want to throw up.

He wasn’t good enough for Phil. He was just so terrified that tomorrow Phil would see that.

Dan ^-^ (11:06 PM)

After hitting send Dan thrust the lid to his laptop down and pushed it off of his chest, letting it fall onto the bed. Dan felt sick again. He was so scared about tomorrow because there were so many things that could go wrong and so many flaws that Phil could discover about Dan and so many, so many, ways for what is supposed to be the best day of Dan’s life to turn out to be his worst.

God, he hated his anxiety for always picking things apart. Always fucking with Dan’s own head.

Dan rolled over and grabbed his duvet, pulling it up and wishing that it would just swallow him whole. Fuck. He couldn’t do it tomorrow. He couldn’t handle this stress.

Taking a deep breath, Dan clutched his duvet tighter in his grasp and tried to keep his lip from wobbling.

Right now he just wanted to sleep. He wanted to forget that he didn’t feel good enough, that yet again his insecurities were screwing him over, that he wanted to cry. He wanted to forget. Unfortunately for Dan the universe didn’t agree and he ended up staying awake for hours after the he had closed his laptop, the entire time doing nothing but thinking, getting lost in his head, and wishing that his thoughts would just turn off.

For once.

Please.

~~~~~~

Dan slung his bag over his shoulder. His fingers felt numb. Unlike his greatest hopes, the fitful-at-best night’s sleep did nothing to alleviate Dan’s terror. If anything, it had only magnified it because now it was today and Dan couldn’t run anymore.

He took a cab to the station, and he ended up being earlier than he needed to be, having about an extra ten minutes to wait for his train. He sat on a bench, his legs nothing but jelly at this point, his fears making it quite easy to foresee his long legs from just giving out on him. Dan didn’t want to make an embarrassment of himself on top of it all, so he tried to calm his racing heart while he sat.

With no luck.

Of course.

Dan looked down at the ticket in his hand. It would be so easy to not go. To walk right out of the station, spend the weekend at home instead of with Phil, and not risk Phil seeing how utterly underwhelming Dan was as a person. He could lie, could say that he ran late, missed his train, maybe his parents changed their minds and didn’t let Dan go.

But God, as Dan looked down at the paper in his trembling hand, he couldn’t help but know that he wouldn’t be able to actually go through with not leaving. He wouldn’t be able to lie to Phil, not about something this big—who was he kidding, he had a hard enough time lying to Phil last night over something so small!

But more than that, Dan knew that it was much more than not being able to lie to Phil. He had wanted to meet Phil ever since he had started to watch his videos, and the sentiment had only increased tenfold with their fast friendship. Phil was now much more than a hero, much more than a few minutes of distraction. He was Phil, Dan’s AmazingPhil, and he was his best friend. That lanky black-haired boy was worth so so much in Dan’s eyes, and he couldn’t, couldn’t, leave him in the dust like that. God it wouldn’t just kill Phil, but it would kill Dan too. He wouldn’t be able to live with himself.

Dan had been thinking too hard. Before he knew it the train was pulling into the station and Dan gulped, raising on still-shaky legs and gripping the strap of his bag so hard he didn’t even have to look to know that his knuckles were blotched white.

As Dan took his seat, a new resolve washed over him. He would go. He would endure this train ride that undoubtedly would be the most anxiety-inducing thing he had done in a very long time—possibly ever—and he would do it for Phil. If Phil would reject him or not, he would try not to dwell on it on the coming trip (a losing battle, Dan knew), but he would still go.

For Phil.

~~~~~

Dan’s heart was going so fast he was sure that he was going to pass out. His hands, his arms, legs, his whole body was trembling.

Manchester’s Piccadilly Station.

Dan was here.

There was a decent amount of people on the station as far as Dan could see as the train pulled in, but none of them looked like his best friend.

The train came to a stop and Dan stood, the first to make it to the doors and there when they opened.

Strangely enough, when the doors pulled open and Dan took a step out into the station, he stopped trembling. His heart slowed—not by much, but it slowed—and this whole thing didn’t seem quite as scary. Sure, Dan’s thoughts were still screaming in his head, sure, his anxiety was still off the charts, and sure, his hands were still sweaty and his breath was still shallow but still. It was as if a calm had washed over him.

Dan wasn’t sure what to make of it. Maybe he was just going into shock.

People busied around him, walking this way and that, talking into cell phones, to other people, some silent. Dan, unsure of everything right now, followed where the general push of people were guiding him, the whole time craning his head, looking for his Phil. He tried not to panic. He tried.

But with every second the calm that had overtook him was shrinking and his anxiety steadily increased.

Did Phil forget? Did he stand me up? Oh God he’s not coming he didn’t come-

"Dan!”

Dan whirled around at the sound of his name, uttered by a voice that sounded so much better when it wasn’t distorted by their shitty computer’s speakers.

Before Dan could register really anything, he was being engulfed in a hug, two strong arms wrapping themselves around Dan’s shoulders, pulling him flush against the figure.

Against Phil.

And instantly all of the shouting in Dan’s head was gone. The slight tremble in his hands vanished, and for the first time in a week, his anxiety was gone without a trace. Dan felt like crying.

Dan gasped in surprise, his brain taking a moment to reboot because Phil didn’t forget, didn’t stand him up, didn’t change his mind, and suddenly Dan felt very, very stupid because how could he ever think that Phil would do something like that. This was Phil, the kindest person on the planet.

Phil pulled away, just a little, just enough so they could see each other’s faces, and Dan had to keep himself from pulling Phil back in.

His smile was so wide, easily the widest Dan had ever seen it. And his eyes, oh God those eyes were a thousand times clearer, a thousand times more mesmerizing than behind a screen. Dan didn’t doubt for a second that he could stand here and look into them for the rest of the day without tiring of their never-ending beauty. Fuck. Why did his eyes have to be so gorgeous.

Dan tore his eyes away from Phil’s and looked over the rest of him, from his broad shoulders that Dan wanted to wrap his arms around, to the tussle of his hair that Dan craved to run his fingers through and the line of his jaw that Dan felt the need to trace. Double fuck. Why did the entirety of Phil have to be gorgeous.

“Dan! I can’t believe you’re here! I have today all planned out; I’m going to show you everything!” Phil said excitedly, a twinkle as clear as day in his eyes. Phil was practically vibrating with excitement and it made a smile spread over Dan’s features. Phil’s happiness was contagious.

Phil stopped his rambling, looking down at Dan sheepishly.

“I mean, if that’s all okay with you. If you don’t want to do something that’s okay, I totally get it. We can do anything you want, I-”

Dan tilted his head back and laughed, laughed because Phil seemed nervous. Phil was nervous and it was adorable.

“Yeah, yeah Phil it’s all fine. All of it, don’t worry. I just can’t believe you want to do it all with me.”

Phil’s smile faded a little, and the twinkle in his eye got that much smaller. He looked a little sad.

“Was this what you were so worried about? That I wouldn’t like you?”

Dan bit his lip and looked down, giving a little nod.

Phil pulled Dan right back into a hug, but this time it felt even more real, and it was impossibly tighter. It felt like Phil was pulling all of Dan’s lost pieces together. Phil’s voice was in his ear.

“Of course I like you, Dan. You’re my best friend. I like you more than anyone else. Promise.”

Dan might have just felt like crying, in that moment. Phil accepted him. He wasn’t going to leave him. Things were okay. They were okay.

He knew that this would hit him later, maybe tonight when he had a chance to process things. He’d probably cry out of relief, but it would all be okay because Phil would be there to hold him together and ease all of Dan’s worries.

Soon enough they set off, hand in hand, and Dan was smiling so wide, so, so wide. He couldn’t have been happier with how things had turned out.

Dan looked sideways at Phil, trying to not be too obvious.

This had worked out so maybe, just maybe, something else could work out for him.

~~~~~

Dan stood at the window, a cup of coffee in his hand. It was early, and he could see the technicolor dream across the sky that was that morning’s sunrise. The steam from his coffee rose from the rim of the cup and slowly diffused into nothing; tendril-like hands wisped up and around Dan’s neck.

It had been nearly nine years.

Dan’s nervousness and dark thoughts never ceased to plague him, however, he learned to deal with it better. He could confidently say that he has never been happier.

It had been nearly nine years, and they were still inseparable. Their channels had grown exponentially, and they boasted an insanely large fan community.

As the years had gone by, their strong, unbreakable friendship slowly blossomed into something remarkably beautiful. Their long Skype calls turned into late night kisses, and they had been happily in love for nearly nine years.

Dan twisted the ring on his third finger. As well as being happily in love, they were also engaged to be married within the next year. Lately, he’d been waking up in complete disbelief.

The thing Dan had wanted so desperately to work out for him did, and in the most perfectly perfect way possible.

#submission

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moritzstiefelwiki · 7 years

Note

Can you write a fix though where hanschen literally says 'smack my ass and call me ernst' because I will fuckonh die

hans/melchior/moritz | 226 words | ao3

Yeah it’s just past 4 30 am rn and I decided I’m just gonna lean into the drunk thing and let typos ... happen. as im sure you’ll be able to tell the effort going into this is pretty minimal because im ready 2 sleep. Lov u anon , heres. whatever the hell this is

Everyone knew about Morit’zs crush on Ernst, he was about as subtle as someone who wasn’t. Ernst was busy getting busy with Bobby Maler tho and was pretty unavailable. Moritz understood this and went elsewhere for affection. Which ended up being talking to Melcihor and Hanschen because everyone knew they were that one couple who were very open to having threesomes because thats just how they were i guess.

So Moritz went to Hanschen and Melchior and they agreed to do stuff with him and that Made moritz really happy because he was desperate for attention, for a distraction from pining over Ernst. But he just couldn’t seem to get into it. No matter what Hanschen and Melchior tried, it just wasn’t working for Moritz.

Hanschen and Melchior were getting really annoyed by this and they tried really hard to not show their annoyance (hHans was better at hiding it than Melchior though) because they might suck sometimes but they arent the Worst and eventually Hanschen ust snapped at Moritz.

“If nothing else, just spank my ass and call me Ernst !!!”

And so Moritz did and he n u t t e d because he just likes Ernst that much i guess ?

Those three did not attempt to do things as a group together again because things clearly did not work out very well for them.

#this has approximately zero redeeming qualities and im pretty ok with that.#my writing #answered #anon

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weaponizedhorse · 7 years

Photo

@inflagrante-delicatessen

Tumblr wont let me reply to some blogs on my kindle so i will respond like this! :)

I mean I'm pretty sure it's a response to things like this https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=dAp-Eb4KMlQ

( You can just skip to the parts of people chanting but its a good video)

Or like when at the chicago pride festival people were shouting " a rainbow pig is still a pig" or like that time cops were shoot at by a blm supporter or that time a bunch of cops were killed or that other time a cops been shot in the line of duty

I think its a response to whole " what do we want? Dead cops" yes its a choice but once you wear the uniform because of all the shit going on in the world and the media everyone judges you a certain way. Its just saying "lets not kill cops k"

You can have an issue with what the government is doing with our troops and where they are sending them/making them do once they enlist and still support the troops? And want rhe veterans who most of the time have PTSD Or Come back disabled TO Be taken cAREe of And be proud to say you support our troops. They arent mutually exclusive just like BLM and blue lives matter

Im PRETTY sure the op of this post speaks Gaelic based on " The Geeky Gaeilgeoir" just sayin. This whole post if you have reading comprehension is about how just using a dictionary to translate doesnt really work. So getting the info from someone who actually speaks the language seemed like my best bet. And The reason I asked other people if they know the translation is because A i have mutuals and followers in that region B google translate is not always reliable as evidence by this post and C i am extremely low on energy and in a ton of pain , my knee is out of the socket, Fingers Are Swollen Ect im using whats left of my energy To CLEan my room so I thought maybe my friends could help me out is that okay with you?

Okay did anyone ask you about Irish americans were treated? What does that have to with this AT ALL. Did you take a poll on that? Have a source? Id love to see it.

Excuse any typos , random capitals (kindle Keyboard On Crack). Like i said not a ton of energy rn lol

#kindle keyboard on crack

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no25 · 5 years

Text

redoing a survey i took 4 years a go!!1! :~)

1: Could you go the rest of your life without smoking a cigarette?

ya because i have asthma so fuck dat // yes

2: Are you single/taken/heartbroken/confused?

all of the above loooooool // taken uwu

3: What if I told you that you were pretty?

i’d say thank you, you are too // same answer!!!!

4: Ever been told “it’s not you, it’s me”?

probably // not that i know of

5: Are you interested in anyone right now?

nah // yes uwu

6: What are you looking forward to in the next week?

nothing. sleeping in on monday pretty much // nothing....

7: Do you want to be single?

i dont mind // not rn bc i am happy in my relationship atm!

8: Did you go out or stay in last night?

i went out and i had jollibee // i stayed in but i wish i went out...!

9: How late did you stay up last night?

til like 1 or 2 i think doing fuckin nothing lol // i dont remember but it was late!!

10: Can you recall the last time you realized you liked someone a lot?

junior year??? and RIGHT NOW ???????? LMAO!!! // yes (: rn!

11: Last three things you had to drink?

breakfast, lunch, and dinner: mocha cappucino, sprite, and water // water, strawberry lemonade, baja blast !

12: Have you pretended to like someone?

ya man i’m fake af lol // yes

13: Have you ever told somebody you loved them and not actually meant it?

ya man i’m fake af lol // not sure, but maybe...

14: Honestly, has anyone seen you in your underwear in the past 3 months?

my mom probably // my bf tony omg the answer difference

15: Is it hard for you to get over someone?

depends but not rly bc i’m fake af lol // idk wtf i was talkin bout but in terms of platonic relationships, it rly depends on my closeness with the person! and i’ve never been thru a breakup so i cant say anything...

16: Think back five months ago, were you single?

ya what was that like august? been single since i was born tbh // no uwu

17: What were you doing at 12:30 this afternoon?

getting ready to shower // i was still in bed lol!!

18: Hold hands with anyone this week?

trisha but she was only holding on to my pinky // tony!

19: Could you go for the rest of your life without drinking alcohol?

no bc it is too late for me // same answer lol

20: What would you name your future daughter?

clara after the singer or adora after that prodigy // who the hell was i talkin about... okay just googled who adora svitak was (the prodigy i was talking about) and sis was born in 97... i too was born in 97....damn i was mute for like half my life and sis was in a TED TALK at 12 so thats cool... anyway i want to name my daughter after my mom!

21: Do you miss anyone?

not really. just one person // yes :(

22: Have you kissed three or more people in one night?

yea but they were just quick pecks on the cheek // yes

23: Did your last kiss take place in/on a bed?

no it took place while i was sitting down in a chair and it was from my pops on my forehead // i do not remember actually LOL

24: Are you good at hiding your feelings?

ya bc i’m fake af lol… just kidding my friends say i make shit hella obvious sometimes guess i’m not as good of an actress as i thought i was // hmm no but i wish i was... but i’m a PISCES i ABSORB EVERY EMOTION AND IT SHOWS

25: Have you ever cried from being so mad?

fffuuuuuuck yyyeeaaaa // yes :(

26: Who did you last see in person?

my parents? what you tryna ask here // i dont rly understand the contxt of this question, im just gona say my roommates bc theyre in the room with me

27: Are you listening to music right now?

yes chandelier by sia // no i’m listening to an asmr video!

28: What is something you currently want right now?

to finish my hw but that’s not happening anytime soon bc f society // i was sooo angsty back then omg lol but i want new makeup, clothes, and accessories!

29: What is the last thing you said out lot?

this question because i read it out loud bc of the typo // hmmm i don’t remember! i think it was... can u wash my fork

30: How is your heart lately?

heavy // empty (: damn i’ve been depressed my whOLE LIFE huh

31: Do you wear the hood on your hoodie?

yes because my head gets cold // sometimes!

32: Are you wearing socks?

yes and they’re grey / not rn

33: What do people call you?

chacha or princess sometimes but not really mostly just charlene // charlene, char! not rly chacha anymore! i miss being called chacha! but ppl who arent that close to me started calling me it so its weird! but it might b my fault for pushing the nickname... but i mean nicknames are only a given IF ur close with that person right... so idk why ppl thought itd b ok right away! like cmon ppl!

34: Will you talk to the person you like tonight?

maybe~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~but if i do i’ll feel like i’m bothering him lol / maybe ! but it’s ok if we dont

35: Are there any stressful situations in your life?

you think this a joke ofc there are wtf!!!! // yes.. same answer LOL

36: Who did you last share a bed with?

my mommy // tony

37: Did you do something bad today?

procrastinate)))))): // same answer, add two shots of ~hate myself~ in there too

38: When was the last time a member of the opposite sex hugged you?

like two days ago? is that sad / today!

39: Do you get stressed out easily?

ya but it’s my own fault i’m hella dumb but in the end i’m just like oh well ALOT which is actually not healthy at all / yes! it fries my brain and i become numb to it lol

40: Will you sing today?

i sing everyday // i hope!

41: Have you ever wanted to tell someone something but didn’t?

yes because i am so bad at talking / same answer!

42: Who do you go to when you need to talk to someone?

kaithleen and i like talking to megs but when i do tell people stuff i feel like i am giving them more stuff to worry about so i usually end up not going to them at all lol / tony or my vocaloid sisters groupchat!

43: Have you ever been taken to the emergency room in an ambulance?

no; thanks jesus / no

44: What are you listening to right now?

we could happen by aj rafael / same asmr video!

45: What is wrong with you right now?

a lot of things / i need to find new ways of unlearning the harmful coping mechanisms and negativity i’ve internalized, but i know it takes a lot of work for self improvement, so i think it’s easier to just be sad :(

46: What is on your wrists right now?

my sleeves and my veins / wtf angsty bitch lmao NOTHING is on my wrist lol chill

47: Where did you get the shirt/sweatshirt you’re wearing?

t’s a house find and it says tiburon and conference center lodge so ig uess it’s from there / it’s a free shirt from a programming company! or gaming i cant remember....

48: What do you like better: hot chocolate or hot apple cider?

hot chocolate wtf is hot apple cider i never tried it / hot chocolate!

49: Do you make wishes at 11:11?

i used to / aww same answer, maybe i should start again! but i always lose track of time...

50: Are you a good artist?

fuck yeah. sike i’m a disgrace / no :(

51: Love really is a beautiful thing huh?

ew / yes!!!!!!

52: Do you miss the way things were six months ago?

who do you think i am do you think people like counting the months backwards? anyway idk i didn;t do shit in july / yes bc i would b at home with my cat!!!!!!!

53: Ever been on a golf cart?

no / not while it was moving!

54: Do you have trust issues?

ya bc i’m fake af lol / yes :(

55: Ever stayed up all night on the phone, with who?

tony or kaithleen kinda but she always falls asleep / tony!

56: Do you own something from Hot Topic?

yea think so from my middle school days but the only thing i can rly think of is this pikachu shirt / yes!!! that pikachu shirt, a goofy movie shirt, and a spirited away shirt!

57: Do you use chap stick?

i used to / not the brand chapstick but yes! i think my lips have become too dependent on it tho bc they dry out or sunburn easily if i dont use it for a while or if its a rly sunny hot day!!

58: Have you ever slapped someone in the face?

yes probably but on accident pretty sure i’d remember it clearly if it was on purpose / not that i know of!

59: Do you have a little sister?

no but if i consider my friends as little sisters i’d have like seven or soemthing / no!

60: Have you ever been to New York?

no but i would love to go / not yet!

61: Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it?

yes and i love them too / same answer !!!!

62: Have you hugged someone within the last week?

ya and it was the opposite sex dude you asked about earlier / yes!

63: What were you doing at midnight last night?

talkin to the late night people you asked about earlier / on my laptop watching asmr videos lol!!

64: Have you ever regretted kissing someone?

no / yes 😥

65: Is there one person in your life that can always make you smile?

ya like 10 / i cant believe i counted... but yes!

66: Were your last three kisses from the same person?

no / yes, tony!

67: Have you kissed anyone in the last five days?

i actually don;t remember oops sorry mom give me up for adoption / yes, tony!

68: Would you rather sleep with someone else or alone?

i am okay with both but i have to be close to you first to face you if we sleepin on the same bed lol / im fine with either !

69: Will next Friday be a good one?

i dont think so. everyday feels the same and i am bored all the time / im gona speak it into existence, YES!!!!

#personal #survey #enough about me has changed....#nostalgia is a LIAIR

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star-bage · 7 years

Text

The squeakuel

FOR ADULTS ONLY!!!!!!!!!! SHOVE OFF U LITTLE KIDS Also i hate alvin and te chipmonks Aight lets get WROOOOIGGGGGGHT INTO THE NEWS ----- Marco hadn't had much time to process what was happening. He'd walked to school, just as he would any other normal day. Stuffed his hands in the pockets of his jeans in the hopes that he would warm them from the chills running up and down his skin. When he looked up, a pale gray sky foreshadowed heavy rain. He'd scolded himself for not thinking ahead and bringing an umbrella, but he'd have to make do with his hood. Who knew, maybe the weather would turn out alright. The California forecast was hardly of any use to them these days. When he entered the parking lot, it was barren. Empty. Not a car in sight to drop students off. As if something had swept the area conpletely clean. He checked the watch on his wrist, feeling nauseous as he read the time. 7:30, 10 minutes before the bell would ring. Anxiety climbed up and froze his shoulders as all possible explanations ran rampant in his mind. Maybe it was a holiday, maybe it was April Fool's Day, maybe everyone collectively decided that school didn't mean dogshit anymore. Maybe Marco was still asleep, maybe he was at the wrong school -- he paled when he saw huge, black letters on the sign spell out ECHO CREEK ACADEMY -- maybe, maybe-- Rave music blared, bursting his eardrums and making him scream. "MARCOOOOOOOOOOO" A familiar voice howled, and Marco turned to see the vortex of an interdimensional portal float before him. Star was peeking her head out and watching him with wide eyes. "star. Wtf u doing." Marco deadpanned as the ringing in his ears invaded his head. It wouldnt stop and tbh he was probly scrwed now welp "IM INVITINGU TO A RAVE PARTAY U SJHOULD BCOME WITH!!" She spun her head in an overexaggerated circle and marco wondered how it wasnt falling off when he shouted back, "ARENT U MISSING SCHOOL "PSH FUCK ACHOOL WTF EVEN IS THAT THE EDUCATION SYSTEM ISFUKED MAN" "STAR THE REASON WHY U GET BAD GRADES IS B/C U DONT STUDY NOT BLC THE EDUCATION SYSTEM IS SHIT" "STFU AND COME HERE" She latched onto marcos arms like a person latching onto the love of their life (sideglance at blood moon no offense but ur like a reallllly tacky plot device u know that ahem anyway) Marco was dragged into the portal against his well and he fell flat on his face on the dance floor. "Bitch," he spat "Ur such a baby wah wah" star said. Marco stood up to brush himself off. He wiped dust from his knees, his cuffs, his shoes, his hair, parted himself down until star punched his arm "OWW" "THE FLOOR ISNT THAT DIRTY U GERMOPHOBE OMFG CHILL OUT" Marco ignored her b/c who cares about a princess who blatantly doesnt care about your wellbeing by constantly dragging u everywhwre, putting u in embarrasing sitchuations, and making u worry about her RITE??! And he took a look around The bounce lounge was quite massive, perhaps twice the size it had been before. Nothing new about it necessarily, but it seemed as if the floor had expanded for the sake of fitting more dancers. Whitch wouldve been nice when marco almost fell to his depth in the spiky spikes!! He felt salty as he folded his arms and made grunting noises to show off his displeasure (this is me when im not at home sleeping in my bed) "Dude wyd" a grown ass man asked as he shashayed near marco "wYD???" Marco retaliated before inching away from the weird man "Im mistur candleman the candleman from mr candle carebears" he danced and did his weird shashay thigng (ok tbh i dont know what shashay means and im too lazyto look it up i just know those weird YA novels with those edgy characters and "ooh so speshul" friends shashay up to their best friends or some shit idfk i think its dumb u think im dumb we're on tbhe same page now) "Mr candleman??" Marco feigned shock, horror, what was this godawful counselordoing here oh the AudACITY FOR HIM TO SHOW HIS FACE AFTER TELLING HIM HE SHOULD WORK ON THAT DUMPSTER ISLAND ooHH MARCO JUST WANTED TO PUNCH HIS DI- "@ ease shoulder" (soldur? Soulja? Soldier? It remains a mystery and No imNot goNNA LOOK IT UP U PREPS) "and yeh in the flesh hmhm im on break now blc master tom stopped giving a shit about me" "Good for u" marco rolled his ryes Candleman started doing the doggie (is this how u spell it?? Yall i cant keep up with thhis shit smfh this is such a dumb name for a dance movie istfg!!!) "U gotta chillax marko diuz... Look... All ur friendz are here¡ u should say hi to them maybe u can boost ur cred since u have no social life..l "U SON OF A CANDLESTICK CAREBEAR MY LITTLE PONY BRONT IM GONNA--" Marco left but not before punching mr candleman in the weewoo "thas wut u get hoe" he clackled as mr kindleman crumpled to the ground in a dayze "420" candleman moana'd ( i put 420 because dayze reminded me of blaze yu know yuh feel) Where wus i goig with this hmm hwwll uhh ok im just gonna say rn that when i kept sayong candleman i just thought of that candle guy from booty and the beast was that just me Margo march'd right over to the photo booth wher star was snapping photos with poony head "Pose. Pose. Pose" star and ponyhead made duckfaces in every pic and marco wanted to scream "ive become so numb i cant feel my pear" Instead "Star butterfly u better to take me hone RIGHT THIS INSTANT!!" Marko yowled "Wtf is e doing here" ponyhead groaned before putting on lipstick... Come to think of it this gurl has no arms.. How would she put on lipstick.. "Marco d-azz do u ever chill put" star dedpanned (i feel deja vu feelin rn) "it doesnt matter how much u say no, no one will evah take u seriously!! Just dreal with it bro" Marco put his foot down to the grownd and clamped his jaw started to hurt "u know wut... U know wut bish wemre done. We break in up. We thru" "Oh no he dint," poony head whispered but like that loud whisper that actually is normal voice level so ppl within a 10 foot raidius could hear "Marco..." Star's lips parted on the name, this time ton e very serious and its a guilt truppy tome u know the one that makes u feel guilt and marco felt guilt but he didnt fukin care he was so thru with all her shit he didnt ask for this and he only dated her cuz that bloody ass moon wanted this Why couldnt HE choose who he wanted to spend his life with it just wasnt gooddamn fare "Goodbai star" he said halloweenly He walked away from them, to get off the danke flore but then remembered "zz SPIKES!!" STAR SCRERCHED "NOOOO" And he was falling, falling to his doom, this was it huh, this was how it was all going to end Marco wiped at his eyes as the air whistled around him, sobbing out that he would miss his frendz (ok one friend), his fam (who kinda embrassered him often), and tom who kinda embrassered him to but u know what... He wasnt that bad "And finally," he whispurred "Janna... Fuck u for taking my khakis" (car keys, u know, i mean the the accent because it sounds like khakis but its actuelle car keys mmk imgunna stfu noe this moment is srs SO SHUT UP SHH Marco closed his eyes shut and waited for his imminent ending to the final chapter kinda like shrek forever after the final chapter but theyre coming up with shrek 5 so yeah i want to die too marco i feel "Star reached outa hand stretching it out to her beeloved, scramming •"NOOOOO MARCOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"• "Polo" matco laughed before flipping off star And darkness. Ebony darkness. -- Naw jk i was messin with u pf "MARCO NOO THE SPIKES" "STFU STAR WHAT DO U TAKE ME FOR" he snatched her um deemensuinal sceesars and sliced thru the air slice slice slice and dice oh my god i hate that video im not im not gonna reference that again and i hope none of u understand what i was referring to So yeah he bust a dimensionut portal open (shit i referenced it again goodbye world) "Ur portal is all week and wiggly" poony head pointed out with her horn cuz she still aint got dem hands "Fuck u. Polo." "What.." star asked as he disappeared -- So in the end, marco dextercided (ok idk why i wrote dexter but im not changing it cuz these typos hav worked in my gavor) to stay.... With tom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Tomco for lyfe 20/20 69/69 420/420 So yeah he went to his underground onion layer and played pung pong with him until tom burst into flamez 2 be continooed?????? Exclamation powerpoint exclamation powerpoint??

#mod crim(e)#this is terrible

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