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weepinglevi · 3 years

Text

jean kirstein as your 1920s servant

summary: 1920s!jean as a servant (footman) and his adventures (he also has adventures with the earl's daughter) warnings: nsfw in the end, and also somehow a bit angsty? don't ask me how that made it's way in. overuse of the word "milady" (i can't even say i'm sorry about this) word count: around 950 A/N: i've been watching downton abbey again. this is a mess and i don't even know if you can call this headcanons or a drabble or an imagine - let's just say it's a bit of everything. i will probably come back to this idea, too. not proofread so if you find any glaring mistakes don't be afraid to point them out! i hope you enjoy reading this just as much as i enjoyed writing it! feedback is greatly appreciated and take care. xx

first of all, he'd look absolutely fine in his livery. the striped waistcoat and coat tails making him seem even taller than he already is, the proud stance whenever he serves breakfast makes you think he’s waiting on the king and queen – not some earl and countess.

fine as heck in his normal clothes, too. a snug fitted corduroy suit with flap pockets being one of his most prized possessions, it’s not even second-hand. he tries to look put together but there’s always some part of his shirt not properly tucked in and his hair sticks out in weird ways at the end of the day – all the pomade in the world can’t help him, though he tries.

he gets in trouble with the butler more often than not. flirting with the kitchen maids even though he should be upstairs, waiting on the lords and ladies, has gotten him smacked over the head more than once. it’s one of the reasons as to why he simply can’t climb up the servant’s ladder – he just likes to have his fun sometimes, ya know? loves hearing the girls giggle at his compliments, too.

on his days off, he’ll take one of them to the pictures. pay for her ticket and let her have a fun time, be a full-on gentleman and bring them back to the estate just in time. he’d never take it any further than that, though. he doesn’t want to get them into actual trouble and with the eyes of the housekeeper lurking around every corner, he’ll settle for a small peck on the cheeks. they squeal anyways, hurrying off to the servant’s quarters to tell their friends all about the evening.

he knows how to drive, too. he’s not good at it, though, and is only allowed to drive if there’s absolutely no other option. whenever her ladyship hears the chauffeur fell ill, she’ll always opt out of driving and take the carriage instead. jean’s just too hot-headed to work his way around the engine and he’s embarrassed to admit but; he’s had a slip of his tongue more than once in front of the lords and ladies because of his rage.

in the evenings, he plays snap with the other footmen and hallboys – always causing a ruckus in the servant’s hall which has him getting in trouble yet again. at this point the others wonder as to why he hasn’t been kicked out like a dog, the butler seems to be on his last nerves with him. they don’t know about his little secret, though – you.

he made eyes on you the first lunch he served on you and your family, practically gawking. thankfully nobody but you noticed, and you made sure to keep it that way. if your father only as much as suspected someone making advances on one of his daughters, that someone would be out of work in a matter of seconds. and you couldn’t have that.

you knew of the trouble the two of you could get yourself into but this didn’t deter you from your plan to have him. maybe it was your rebellious side finally acting up, wanting to break free from the heavy confines of your life – but mostly it was because of the way jean carried himself through the corridors of your home; as if he wasn’t a servant. as if he was head of the house.

you called him jean instead of the formal “kirstein” the first time you spoke to him in private, having him blush and shift on his feet. he didn’t know how to handle himself around you at first, but you knew your way around his defenses – how to make him know that it’d be alright if you and him were to come closer.

it’s been a year since you first shared a hurried kiss in the drawing room and after that you needn’t ask him twice to join you late at night in your bedroom.

he’s cockier now, slipping through your door and getting rid of his suit on the way to your bed – both of you know there isn’t much time until dawn breaks and the other servants would wake up to get the fires started. he had to be gone by then.

pulling the heavy drapes of your four-poster bed shut behind him, he’s already pushing up your nightgown, causing your skin to grow warm under his touch.

this is how you got here, having him breathe “milady” against the crook of your neck as he’s buried deep inside of you, never daring to call you by your first name; no matter how many times you asked him to.

you know he’s had many other women but you couldn’t care less, pulling him in even closer until he is flush against you, trying to drink in his recklessness – his freedom and his pride.

coming undone under him, he is soon to follow, rutting against you desperately. “milady, milady, milady,” an answer to your whispered “jean.”

having him rest on your chest like this, air heavy with his and your scent, you try to imagine a world where the two of you could live a life out in the open. playing with his hair, you make a face as he starts to move away from you.

“stay.”

“you know it’s not possible,” being the only thing that leaves his lips as he opens the drapes again, soft light of the candles illuminating his features as he gets dressed and sends a glance over his shoulder, “goodnight, milady.”

“goodnight, kirstein.”

his expression turns sour at the sound of his last name out of your mouth, but he nods and leaves through your door without another word.

taglist: @deludedimagines @aotwrites @peachysimp @blondeboyfriend @odmlevis @bellasw4an @jeageristbaby @starrynightlys (i hope u are ok with me tagging you, claire ahah) wanna be tagged in my next work? fill out this form. addendum: i know this thing is impossible to happen - an earl's daughter frolicking around with a footman for over a year without being caught or even falling pregnant but PLEASE. footman jean. that's all i need.

#jean kirstein #jean x reader #jean kirschtein #aot x reader #aot smut #jean smut #snk smut #1920s au #footman!jean #weepinglevi writes #nsfr

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wizkiddx · 3 years

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ohmyword if your doing req can u pls do another fluffy, domestic one bcos honeymoon morning is some i read daily AHAH maybe like the reader gets ill and toms away or something???? pls just anything fluffy

awh thank you for being so sweet abt honeymoon morning - I do think that's one of my favourite concepts ive done!! and I hope this suits what you want, im not so sure myself but I tried :)))

summary: you try to hide being ill from Tom before he leaves but inevitably it doesn't all go to plan

warnings: mentions of being sick, I think that's all - basically just fluff

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The night hadn’t really gone typically at all. Instead of relishing the last night with Tom for a few months, your body seemed to have different plans. Hence why now you were curled up in a ball on the sofa, staring blankly at the TV, while the washing machine whirred next-door in the utility room and the chemical smell of cleaning products enveloped the downstairs. At least when you were sick, you were a clean sick.

You were also a quiet sick. You had been pulled from your sleep by the uncomfortable heavy sensation from your stomach barely an hour after you’d both headed to bed. Why was beyond you - what had been important in that moment was to get away from Tom. He was flying back to set tomorrow (or given the early hours currently, lunchtime today was more appropriate) and only had a single day to settle before launching back into filming. So the poor boy was inevitably, given time zones, going to be running on poor quality plane sleep for the next couple of days - you wanted to five him a final night of peace, at least.

As a result, you’d crept downstairs and since then spent a large chunk of the night making good friends with the downstairs toilet bowl. Once you were absolutely certain there was literally nothing else in your stomach, you chucked some bleach down the loo; then stripped your *stained* pyjamas and chucked them in the washing machine; changed into some freshly washed stuff in the utility (comprising of joggers and one of Tom’s hoodies); before you could curl up in the corner of the sofa.

And that’s how you’d been for an hour or so. Still feeling grim, unable to fall asleep as much as you were trying to and generally just lying in a ball of self pity. And that was fine… until you heard the unmistakable slow padding of footsteps down the stairs.

“Love?… -hy’re you up?” His voice was drenched in sleep, making it pull on your heart strings, even before he had rounded the sofa and come into view. Dressed only in his heather grey joggers only, Tom’s curls sat ontop of his head wildly - sticking up at all ridiculous angles. And then there was his puffy eyes, barely open as he slowly processed the sight of you curled up on the sofa.

“Just couldn’t sleep and didn’t want to keep you up tossing and turning. Why are you up bub?”

“Don’t sleep good without you… you know kicking me and stealing the duvet and stuff.” Never one to maintain a level of seriousness and ‘soppiness’ - it was instantly turned back to the typical relationship of the two of you. While rolling your eyes, you still chuckled at him in the low light of the TV. Tom took the opportunity to perch on the edge of the sofa, sitting so he was grinning loopily down at you. “You fancied putting a wash on too?”

“...I don’t know just trying to be productive?” He was catching on, he was suspicious. You could tell. His eyebrows furrowed together and he delicately hovered the back of his hand over your forehead, feeling the undeniable heat radiate into his skin.

“And bleach?”

“Toilet needed doing anyway.” You mumbled, head turning to stare back at the TV- knowing his eyes were piercing into your soul. He sighed, in your peripheries you could see him shaking his head in slight frustration, as his hand reached for yours, giving it a squeeze.

“You’re ill aren’t you?”

“I’m alright-“ he cut you off with a low warning of your name, making you cower slightly because he’d caught you in a lie. “I threw up a couple times but now I just feel a bit ‘eugh’”. That was, to be fair, a completely truthful description of your evening and current situation. Maybe not put most eloquently but Tom definitely got the messsage, somehow reading your mind by lightly massaging your abdomen with his hand that wasn’t clasped with yours.

“Come on... let’s get you back to bed.” As much as you wanted to argue with him, it was clear any attempt would be futile. One of things you love so much about Tom is how fiercely protective he is of those dear to him. His circles progressively shrunk as he learnt who he could trust and who ... well he couldn’t. The culling had left a handful of people who were almost central to Tom’s life - somehow you’d managed to wangle your way into these select few too.

So no, there was not point arguing or suggesting he puts his own welfare first.

After putting you back int the double bed, Tom had disappeared for 10 minutes or so, when he reinterred the room it was clear he’d been busy. His tongue was stuck out in focus as he tried to balance different mugs and plates on a tray to you. Even if you felt shitty, for a moment by just seeing how far this guy had gone for you - you’d never felt better.

“Okay there’s some lemsip with honey to settle your stomach, water and a slice of toast just because you should probably see if you can keep something down.”

“You really are the sweetest.”

“And you’re the illest so get drinking love.” He laughed softly in the yellow glow of the bedside lamps that illuminated the room. It highlighted his prominent jaw line and the way his eyes crinkled in the corners and given your slightly off state, you might’ve spent a bit too long ogling at the man cosied up next to you. Never would there be a time you weren’t grateful for him.

Turns out you couldn’t keep the toast down but the experience was somewhat less horrific - this time you were spilling your guts out into your ensuite, while Tom held your hair and rubbed your back. Eventually things settled, allowing The two of you nestle back into bed, Tom wrapping his arms round your stomach to lightly trace random patterns on the skin underneath your hoodie - as you nestled back into his chest more.

“I really love you Tom”

“Love you darling, now get some rest and shout if you need anything.” You hummed lightly, almost letting go to sleep now your felt a bit less like your intenpstines were wringing themselves together. But not quite.

“I’m gonna miss you and your stupid face.”

“We can talk about that when your better” It was as if Tom thought whispering and drawing circles on your stomach was going to deafen you to his words. Yes your stomach wasn’t having a lot of fun and you were tired - but you were not deaf. It was oh so predictable too, he loved to be absolutely ridiculous. Indignantly you huffed, rolling over and eyeing him intently.

“What’s there to talk about?”

“Just…. Just if your sick you shouldn’t be on your own. I could always just-“

“No no you couldn’t. You and me both know for a fact you do have a choice and even if you did it be pissing off a hell of a lot of people.” He pouted, you could tell even in the darkness of the night.

“I hate having to leave you though, especially like this.”

“Yes but you love your work too. I’ll be here when you get back… maybe just with a bit less intestines.” Laughing at that, Tom pulled you onto his chest, pressing his tips to the crown of your head as your burrowed into his side.

It can’t have taken more than 5 seconds for you to fall asleep, exhausted from the illness, the stupid time in the morning and maybe slightly for dealing with Toms idiocy.

You were awoken in the morning to Tom stroking your hair gently, all dressed and ready for his flight - but still finding the time to fuss over you and wanting to say a proper goodbye. After practically ordering his to leave… you best believe he dropped in the fact he’d got both Sam and Harry to come round as your babysitter.

He was an idiot. But he was your kind, caring , beautiful and loving idiot.

#tom holland #tom holland fluff #tom holland x reader #Tom Holland blurb #Tom Holland angst

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hoopsies · 5 years

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I found you through your Lucio's comic, but I really loved your lineless mood practices and I wish you could show how you choose the colors for it/ how you do those? It's so pretty and I need to learn about it...

TLDR : I cant tldr this, but here’s muriel’s process if you wantI’m so sorry for taking so much time to answer, I wanted to provide as much details into my thought-process as I could but… I can’t?

I’m someone who works a loooot on instinct, so there’s not really anything I can provide that’s practical :/.I’d only be repeating what has already been said (work with references/get out of comfort zone, practice makes perfect T_T…). But I can share the process of Muriel’s picture (which a lot people appreciated despite it being BAD [sorry but it’s the truth lol])

Also lastly, I’m a student and I’m still young, my stuff is faaaar from the ultimate goal!!! not like i’d ever pretend it to be, but just to be sure you check out actual professional artists!I try my best to do small pieces that follow the kind of thing Snatti does for example, it’s “simple” and effective. I personally try to do quick studies with the aim of doing something similar ;v; (ill never show them tho ahah nopenope).

Not all of the things I can say about Muriel’s pic goes into your question in specific, but I hope it can help! Also I’m french hope the terms translate well in english

- First thing I can say goes into composition : there’s a veeeery quick grid that highlights the rule of third! The subject of the piece (Muriel + Innana (rip) + The Heart of the Forest) is placed on one of the third because it “fits well”. It looks harmonious? You can always play with that rule if you wish to convey other feelings tho (squish a character on one third while another fills the other two for example, another with the same idea would be a characted on the top left dominating over another who stands on the bottom right, classic!). I didn’t have much in mind beyond just getting used to Procreate so there’s not much thinking beyond just having the pic look nice.You can check out the Lucio comic again and normally, you’ll see that the rule of third is almost always there!

- Next I put a main color as background + fill it with some others to have the general mood.Best advice I can give there is to avoid as much as possible layer effects if you want to improve faster on colors (otherwise have fun!), it’s just personnal experience, but being able to find the colors yourself on not rely on layer effects like multiply or overlay to make things blend together well is important, it helps for everything, i have friends who often work with limited color palettes and oh boi their sense of colors is so amazing they create beautiful things.I picked green (on the yellowy side because green green is meh) as the main color! But forests are very varied and you can do whatever you want! There is some bits of blue here and there too just to bring variety and avoid just saturating the pic with green (tho it still ends ups like that lol)

Thus far all the moody pics I made had a main color, so even the brown trees go towards the green side (thus end up on the yellow/orange range in the color wheel), it helps keeping things harmonized and further the ‘mood’ c:. I think.

- I lied tho, I still use layer effects for those kind of painterly pics, but at the end of them! Finishing touches! Multiply with dark green on the edge just to help the eye focus on the subject + hard light for the rays of lights uvu. There’s also an overlay overall to help blend things together because ya, I still struggle with colors.If you work with Photoshop, there’s A TON of post-production stuff you can do! Curves, Levels, effects! Check out tutorials or just experiment with them yourself, they make miracles.

- Lastly, have fun!! Ya obvious, I hate studies too TuT, so mash it up with stuff you enjoy! You don’t like backgrounds? But what if you could put your apprentice having tea time with Nadia at the end of it?? Struggling with male anatomy?? Me too man, but what wouldn’t I do to put Lucio’s face on them pecs?? Just find what works with you my dude!!

- EDIT : I can say something about the beginning too! I work almost always with masses, big silhouettes for everything thumbnaily-like (like, post-it sized on the screen), just to get a feel of the overall piece and composition, it helps A TON, both for making poses and just having the general feel of the piece work great, only afterward will I zoom in with and make another layer on which i draw the details.

MURIEL VID HERE

#answer #makeshift tutorial #i cant even pretend it is one lmao its too pretentious #Anonymous

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novantinuum · 5 years

Text

A Link Beyond Memory (ch 2/4)

AO3

Fandom: Trollhunters, 3Below

Rating: T (for minor language in future chapters)

Words: 600~

Pairings: Jim/Claire, but not focus

Summary: Shortly after the events of the Eternal Night, memories of a day that never happened somehow resurface in Jim’s mind in his sleep- and upon recalling the friendship he and Aja formed, he decides to pursue that connection again. Slice of life, and kinda a slow burn friendship reunion. A hybrid of prose and chat fic (to be seen in later chapters.)

Previous chapter

Next chapter

Note: Unfortunately, fic circulation online is getting harder and harder as the months pass. Please, if you read to the end and enjoy, consider helping me out by reblogging this post, or even commenting/giving kudos over on AO3. Thanks! :D

Chapter 2: Transit

Transit- The instant when a celestial object crosses the meridian, thus reaching the highest point in the sky.

T: hhhh miss ya already. tbh i dont know what im supposed to do this summer now ahah

T: i was all looking forward to hangin with you and claire and everyone else in trollmarket and now…

T: i mean i still have aaarrrgghh. and darci and eli too i guess but

T: really starting to wish i came along.

T: i know you said to watch over the town while youre gone and i know thats a good point but honestly i just wanna be with you

T: jim?

T: yoooo ? did u die

T: god i hope not after all the end of the world chaos thatd be really anticlimactic

J: Sorry no I lost signal for a bit!! Miss you too gahhh.

T: pls know if you so much as say the word ill crawl on the first airplane i can find and launch myself directly at your face

T: jim liSTEN jim im not even kidding

T: screw arcadia

T: if you need me im there

J: Omg I’ll defo keep that in mind

T: ..jk dont screw arcadia tho i love this place. also its already screwed enough at this point so

T: hey but you think merlin could make me another warhammer for my growing arsenal?

J: Yeah I think he could be easily convinced.

J: He’s kinda sucking up to me now hahah

J: He already made Claire a sorta necklace amulet to store her armor so a magic hammer should be no problem

T: awesomesauceee

J: Any particular reason lol?

T: i dunno i just think itd look wicked cool to double wield, like general orzan from gun robot three. also lets be real after all the crap he put us through we deserve S W A G

J: I’ll ask tomorrow. Hey quick Q for you though

J: Well okay not exactly quick

J: It’s actually a long story but-

T: ye?

J: Do you happen to have Aja’s number or anything?

J: We took her and her bro down to the Janus Order, lightning in a bottle, remember her?

T: ye i know- lively! and uhhh don’t think i do? havent really talked to them since why

J: I get the strangest sense we’re supposed to know them more than we do. Had a really weird dream but it felt more like a lost memory. Think it’s an amulet thing, like that alternate timeline it made me live through once?

T: huh funky

J: Also supposedly according to the dream/memory both Aja and Krel are… not from Earth?

T: dude no offense but are you sure it wasnt just a normal dream

J: Seriously.?

J: Merlin turned me into a fucking TROLL and aliens are where you decide to draw the line

T: okay yknow thats fair

T: i take that back

T: okay so,, aja and krel are MAYBE aliens. got that. go onnn

J: What I saw honestly felt so real, I swear. It was two weeks ago, at the science fair. We were fighting a troll in the planetarium with them, and the troll kept combining magic with some alien tech, which kept reversing everyone back to the beginning of the day, like a time loop or something. But I could remember everything bc of the amulet. Aja remembered bc of some energy shield she had. We lived through the same day almost a dozen times.

T: whoa…

J: And get this- in some of those loops we even went to their house and got to look around inside their spaceship! But none of us are supposed to recall any of it bc technically the entire day never happened? It’s how we defeated the troll, that bit’s a little fuzzy. A lot of technobabble sorry.

T: goddd out of all the days to forget huh

J: Right??

J: I guess… if she remembered all of this before I’m kinda curious if she still remembers now too. If it really happened. We were friends in that memory. It’d be nice to maybe get to know her again, y’know?

T: okay you’re prob gonna hate me for suggesting this but i THINK steve has her number

T: bc i was talking to darci and she said that mary told her that aja and steve are like, a thing now

T: a Thing thing

T: i believe her exact words were ‘staja’ ?

J: Oh my god how’d that happen is he even capable of proper flirting

T: well if shes an alien like you think then maybe she doesn’t know what human flirting looks like

J: Haha maybe indeed. I’ll go talk to him thanks

J: G’night Tobes love ya

T: night buddy <3

(my notes from ao3:)

Admission, I had far too much fun with the text format. I've never attempted anything like it, but I especially wanted to create unique "character voices" that extended into the way they each type- which was a cool challenge.

I imagined Toby as the sort of person who types out his thoughts far too quickly to care about punctuation, and IMO if Trollhunters was set just a year later (I generally just imagine it all set in 2016) he'd be keymashing. Jim is more of a full sentence type of guy who never turned off auto capitalization.

ALSO, a note on the contact photos- (Jim's which I directly took from a screenshot from Claire's phone, and Toby's which I edited from some 2D concept art)- That's the photo Jim uses for Toby's contact, and I imagine there's probably some inside joke where Jim took a really derpy photo of him at one point and they laughed so hard about it that he immortalized it as his contact. Jim's personal contact photo is... well, as this all takes place post s3 of course, a rather sad reminder of his loss of humanity. He can't bother himself to change it currently.

Future chapters will likely be a mix of text AND prose, instead of one or the other. Hope you enjoyed!

#trollhunters #jim lake jr #toby domzalski #trollhunters fanfiction #my writing stuff

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honey-baes · 6 years

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ALL THE EMOJI ASKS PLS RACHEL

I DONT THINK U REALIZE HOW MANY THERE BLOODY IS THIS TOOK ME SO LONG AHGSJHAGSJHAGSJ

💗 if you could hug anyone, who would it be? @occultlike she looks like she’d be soft n squishy n im here for that

🐹 what are some of your favourite Pokémon and why? litwick!!! idk its just so pretty!!!! i also love darkrai n jirachi cus those were two of my fave pokemon movies as a kid!!!

🌠 if you were in charge of the world, what would the world look like? p fucking gay ig uhh there would be flowers every fucking wear for sure

👀 what was the most recent vivid dream that you had? i dont dream much?? the last dream i had all i remember is like,,, somebody ik dying?? idk

☀️ what do you like the most about your best friend? idr have a best friend BUT i love all my friends for being the most TALENTED N CREATIVE people ever im. gushing

😘 talk about your crush or partner - dude i have a new crush every week but uhh but i kinda have a thing for my friend ajhdahdha

💁 if someone was rude to you, would you be rude back? def not!!!!! i hate confrontation n i usually just stay silent (although that never fuckin works n i really need to stand up for myslef ahdgahd) tho if its playful ill def be a bitch

🌟 what do you like about yourself? (must choose at least 3 things!) I’ve gotten through so much n im still here!!!!!! // i try to be kind to the people around me //

🐾 what are you scared of most? how will you overcome it? uhh this is dumb but really myself??? like, my paranoia is really shit n it makes me scared of alot of shit im fully aware isn’t a threat or anything

🎁 what never fails to make you happy? flowers!!!!!!!!!!!!

💙 what annoys you about some people? people who are rude for no reason!!!!! it just annoys me when people say something in a rude tone for literally no reason yknow

😤 do you get angry easily? uhh yes unfortunately!!!! i have alot of pent up anger ahdhaajsdhasd

🐇 what do you always daydream about? alot of things!!! i’ll often daydream about mundane stuff like what i’m gonna draw later n that

🌻 if you could change 3 things about the world what would you change?

✈️ what is your dream city and why? hmm vancouver looks pretty cool!!!!!! idk im a lil bit sheltered n a lil bit bad at georgraphy

☕️ talk about your ideal day - i’d wake up n make some green tea and honey and then do some painting in my room, n have pasta for dinner!!!! i love pasta jadhajsdja

🌸 are you an introvert, ambivert or extrovert? introvert definitely!!! i love my friends but being around people, especially outside is really draining hh

💧 when was the last time you cried? uhh yesterday hjdgasd i cry p much every day HhhhH

🎵 name 5 songs you love at the moment - wetsuit // a lack of colour // drop pop candy // talk too much // if you’re over me

⚡️ if you had any superpower, what would it be and why? i’ve always thought itd be awesome to be able to read peoples mind!!!! ig i really just want to know what people think of me?? ahdhags

💛 if you could talk to your younger self, what would you say? please for the love of god don’t eat that much icing at once it won’t end well

💚 who are you jealous of and why? idrk um i’m naturally kinda jealous of loads of artists??? just cus i think my arts been p bad recently n im really envious of others art hhh

💎 which one would you rather have more of: intelligence, beauty, kindness, wealth or bravery? why? kindness!!! i’m none of those things except for kind so i might aswell go that route yknow ahdhadgaj

🙊 what are you ashamed of? dude alot of things honestly most things i do adjhadhass

🌺 which languages do you know? which do you want to learn? i know english and welsh!!!!! i don’t think i’d be able to learn another language tbh hh

🍀 if you could be any fictional character’s best friend/lover, which fictional character would you be? hmm i love tomoyo daidouji n i’d love to be her friend!!!!! (she’s from cardcaptor sakura!!!)

💜 which acts of kindness are you going to do today? i’m in the proccess of drawing something for someone!!!! n fufilling reqs!!!!

🐬 if you could transform into any animal/magical creature, what would you be and why? a siren bcs theyre pretty and murderous n i like that

🍄 talk about someone/something you really dislike - ash she’s a real dumbass yknow

😣 talk about some things that have been making you depressed/angry/anxious lately - everything tbh hh ive been going thru a rlly shit rough patch atm but!!! im still here so

🍪 what did you want to be as a kid, and what do you want to be now? i wanted to be a artist, n i didnt for a couple years but i do again!!!!

🍰 what are some of your favourite sugary foods? chocolatechocolatechocolate

🍑 what are you obsessed with? currently bnha n kiribaku!!!!!!!! n uhh kamideku/tododeku/kamisero/ashido and happiness

💘 what happens to you when you’re stressed? i uhh cry hh

😪 what are you sick of? it being so hot!!!!!! gahh

🙀 are you an adrenaline seeker? nO

☔️ would you consider yourself a good person? i’m definitely trying!!!!!! i don’t know if i really am yet though ahah

😊 what do you like to do as hobbies? painting!!!! video games!!!! i love doing sumi-e/oil/watercolour/digital painting n i love nintendo games!!

🎤 what’s the last song you hummed or sang by yourself? i sang Hot n Cold ahddgahdajadh

🐝 what’s your worst trait? how are you planning to improve it? me being a bit of a pushover hadahdsjjah im trying to stand up for myself but it usually just ends up in more grief HHH

🎨 what do you always doodle when you’re bored? eyes!!!!!! i draw eyes all over my school books, and bloody hands!! // i like doodling blood hh

🐻 what’s stopping you from chasing your dreams? i’m like uhhh 2 years old ig

🌷 what’s your mbti personality and why do you think it suits you? i havent,,, done that hhh

👑 who are your favourite celebrities and why? off the top of my head i love jenna coleman cus uhhh shes a pretty lady

🍋 do you consider yourself an emotional person? o fuck yeah

📚 share 3 books that you love and your favourite quote from them. alices adventures in wonderland // ‘she generally gave herself very good advice, although she very seldom followed it’ | through the looking glass and what alice found there // ‘Thy loving smile will surely hail the love-gift of a fairy tale.” | the lion, the witch and the wardrobe // ‘She did not shut it properly because she knew that it is very silly to shut oneself into a wardrobe, even if it is not a magic one.’

😔 what do you always do when you feel sad? does it help? i listen to music!!!!

😌 what thoughts keep you going when you’re sad? def my friends!!! i don’t acc like talking about things that are bothering me but i know they’d all be willing to listen and care about what i say n that makes me happy ahhh

🌍 which country do you live in? wales!!!!

🐧 describe yourself in 3 words - salty, tired, TIRED

💭 do you keep a diary? i have tried but alas i cant keep up w that shit

💫 who inspires you? so many people!!!! my science teacher is p cool n i wanna be like him!!

👻 do you believe in ghosts and why? idk but uhh i like buzzfeed unsolved so

🎀 what’s your fashion sense like? black, hoodies n sweaters n LEGGINGS

🎬 what are some of your favourite films? the captain america movies!!!!

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bmongmong · 3 years

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Chapter 3 - New Emotions

Blue pill or red pill - Jungkook

Description: You're a young girl, who's a little bit introverted and afraid to be under everybody's eyes. You only have your best friend, but it's ok for you. You don't want to be popular and believe in minimal things. One day you meet a guy. Or two?

Jungkook x Reader

The imagines I used are not mine Credit to the owners

Y/n pov

Another week has passed and it seems like me, Rosé and Jungkook have become a great trio.

As I walk towards school I receive a message from Rosé:

Rosé:

Y/n sorry but today I won't come to school. I feel very sick ☹

That's ok I guess. If she's ill, she needs some rest and-WHAT?! OH MY GOD, I'LL BE ALONE!! WHO'S GOING TO PROTECT ME?! I BET EVERYONE WILL LOOK AT ME. WHAT IF THOSE BULLIES COME TO ME BECAUSE SHE'S NOT WITH ME?! Ok y/n. You have to calm down.

I feel my heart pounding very fast and the palms of my hands sweating. This weird sensation is pervading all parts of my body. From my feet to my head. I feel my legs strangely weak, but somehow I can walk without any problems.

I find myself at the entrance of my class. I take a deep breath, but I cannot move. I just want to run away from here. I feel really pathetic right now. I'm all grown up and I can't even go to school by myself, without my friend. Then...

"Are you going to go in or stay here all day?" I turn around and it's Jungwook.

I don't answer, I just look away and try to find an excuse, but it seems like my lips are sewn. Nothing comes out, a part form little indescribable noises.

"Move" he says scoffing and entering the class.

I just stand there, embarrassed of what just happened. I'm still not used to people talking to me, except if it's Rosé or Jungkook. That's right. The good twin. We talk a lot actually and I feel comfortable around him. Of course, there are still lots of things that we both don't know about each other, but I think that now, I can really consider him a friend of mine.

As I'm thinking about the people I know, still on the edge of the door, I hear a voice speaking to me:

"Y/n don't pay attention to him" it's Jungkook. For some reasons I feel calm now. My legs are no longer shaking and my mind is free from bad thoughts. He then continues:

"Come on, let's go inside together!" as he smiles, he grabs my hand and drags me inside. At that very moment, I felt like I died for a couple of seconds and then I resurrected. But then I realize that it was just my heart skipping a beat, or maybe two or three.

Now I'm seated at my spot, still thinking about the two Jeons. Wow, they're really different. The kind one, Jungkook, can make my heart flutter with just a single move, while the other one, Jungwook, is just a bully. As I find myself drawing on the desk, still thinking about those two boys, I hear a voice talking to me. To my surprise is Jimin:

"Y/n. Since today Rosé won't come at school, why don't you stay with us?" as he invites me, I see his hands pointing at him and the two brothers. I nod in response and I see Jungkook smiling. I guess it's not going to be that bad, but wait. How does he know about Rosé?

"Umh...Jimin...sorry for bothering" I say at a very low voice "How do you know about Rosé?"

"Oh didn't she tell you?" he asks surprised and I shake my head. Then I see him blushing a bit and smiling "she texted me this morning. She said, she didn't feel well. And she asked me to take care of you"

My heart melts. Rosé. I really can do noting without you. I feel my eyes a bit teary, thinking about her love towards me. She's like a second mum to me.

In order to not leave me alone, Jungkook sat beside me, at Rosé's spot. I honestly felt a bit better. During the lesson me and him would write on the desk to have some fun. He then helped me with a math problem I couldn't solve. As he leaned close to me, I felt my heart popping out of my chest. His face was so close and once he noticed he quickly turned away blushing.

During other classes I kept scolding myself. Too much is happening in my life. But as I think about Jungkook I start smiling. As much as I want to be emotionless, I really like the feeling when I'm close to him. I guess I'll just allow this new emotion. But what type of feeling is this? Friendship? I honestly don't know, but for sure I know it's not the same emotion I feel when I'm with Rosé.

By now I've known Jungkook for a couple of weeks, or maybe three.

I think I'm too strict to myself.

As another lesson ends I can see Jungwook walking towards us and talking:

"Can you two stop being all lovely dovely? It's honestly annoying"

Me and Jungkook look at each other and start blushing. Then the kind guy next to me talks back to his brother:

"We're not...like...just stop it Jungwook" I feel him nervous. He's kinda transmitting me his anxiety.

As I look at the two twins, I notice their little diversities. For example, Jungkook has a little spot under his lower lip, and I actually find this cute. Then I notice that he also has pretty long hair. Not as long as Jungwook's, but they're pretty long too. Regard the bad guy, I notice the many tattoos on his arm. They're so many!! But it's kinda attractive. WHAT ARE YOU THINKING Y/N?! SERIOUSLY STOP!!

As I'm internally debating with myself, Jungwook gets closer to my face. He's just a few inches away from me. WHAT IS HE DOING? I'm seriously about to explode. I'm feeling too many emotions. My body doesn't know how to react to this. It's actually a mix of excitement and anxiety.

"Stop acting so innocent y/n" the bad boy says as he stares into my eyes. Honestly, his gaze is so piercing. I feel like he can see my soul sailing inside my body.

Now I can hear all my classmates whispering. Jungkook notices how uncomfortable I look and he pushes away his brother saying:

"Leave her alone" he's not nervous. He rather seems calm and serious.

As the gangster walks away, I notice a group of girls looking at me. I know Jungwook is pretty famous, but I didn't expect such reactions.

"Y/n just ignore that" I hear Jimin saying as he handles me a bottle of fresh water. "Calm down, I'll talk to him later"

I guess Rosé told Jimin that I'm easily conditioned. I'm talking about my emotions. Now I feel nervous, I'm afraid Jimin will tell everybody about this.

"Don't worry y/n" this one says "I won't tell anybody" he says winking at me.

I blush a little and look away. He then continues:

"But I need to ask you a favour"

"What is it Jimin?" I ask curious, still flustered, due to what happened.

"Rosé. Convince her to go out with me"

I just nod and he leaves. So I was right!! Jimin has feelings for her! Yess, I'm so happy. Wow my mood is like a roller coaster. At first I feel nervous and scared, then right after I feel very happy. So many mood swings.

Then I feel a hand on my shoulder. I flinch a bit, not expecting this type of skin ship, and turn around to face Jungkook, who's now talking to me:

"Y/n are you alright?" he asks. I can see that he's trying to look calm, but he's actually nervous.

"Yes, I think. Thank you Jungkook....for saving me earlier ahah..." I say a bit awkward.

"Don't worry. Even though he's tough, I know him really well and I know how to handle this type of situations" he seems a bit sad as he says this. "Do you need something?"

"O-Oh don't worry, I'll just go and get some fresh hair" I say and quickly stand up, leaving the room.

Now I'm walking down the empty hallway and stop at some point, leaning on the wall. I need some support since I feel my whole body trembling and shaking. As I turn around I see those girls that were looking at me earlier.

"So you're y/n? never heard of you" one of them says as the others start laughing at her lame joke. I'm just embarrassed and look down. I mean, that's what I wanted, not to be known. As I play with my fingernails due to nervousness, I feel one of those girls, grabbing my hair and making me fall on the ground. I put my hand in my hair to prevent her from pulling my hair even more, but she's really strong and eventually ends up pulling them a lot.

"How pathetic!" she says scoffing "I feel pity for you" and they start laughing.

I'm about to cry. I feel alone and helpless. I feel like I'm about to throw up all of my emotions. They're too many. And too heavy to handle. I feel my heart breaking into pieces as they keep making fun of me and pulling my hair. That's it. The end of a movie, where the main character gets beaten up and ends up dying alone. That's what I thought, until...

"Leave her alone" it's a male voice. He seems bossy and steady.

"Jungwook. What are you doing here?" one of those girls asks him "we just wanted to make sure she would never disturb you again. We saw what happened earlier"

"How many times do I have to tell you girls, that I will never date one of you? Now leave her alone and go away. And if I see you bothering her again, something bad will happen" he says threatening. Wow, he' really scary.

As I see those girls going away, I look up and see Jungwook looking at me from above.

His body looks so good. He has really long and muscular legs and wide shoulders. I see his black belt hugging his tiny waist and his tattoos moving in sync with his muscles as he cracks his fingers.

"Stand up" he orders me.

I'm so scared right now. I feel like I could die, if I don't listen to this man. I quickly stand up facing him, but my eyes are looking away.

"Look at me" he says.

I just widen my eyes and tense up my body. I'm sweating again, I can feel the heat invading my body. He then repeats himself and I obey. As I look at him I feel kinda hypnotized. Like if my life was an actual movie and I'm just an actress, who's acting.

He gets closer to my face and asks me:

"Did they hurt you?"

I look away and shake my head. I'm too embarrassed to look at him, but he grabs my chin with his fingers and turns my head to his. I feel my heart in my throat and I can hear every beat. My breath gets heavy and I feel a drop of sweat slowly going down from my neck to my chest. It goes really slow and it actually gives me thrills.

I see him scoffing and asking at a really low voice:

"Why you?"

Is he referring to me? Did I do or say something wrong? Am I going to die?

I see him getting closer and closer and I instinctively shout my eyes. But then I hear Jimin:

"Y/n are you ok? We heard some noises so we came to check"

What is he doing here? And he's with Jungkook!!

As the boy that's holding my chin hears Jimin and Jungkook arriving, he lets go of me and steps away snorting. I'm actually relieved that nothing happened. I couldn't stand another scandal. Then I hear Jungkook voice:

"Y/n! Did he hurt you?" he says concerned.

"No, not at all. He actually helped me..."

As I finish explaining them what happened, I see Jungkook's face changing expression. He looks disappointed. Don't know why.

As we go back to the classroom, I feel a mix of emotions, but I cannot distinguish them. It feels so strange. I try to feel sad, but I can't. Then I try to feel angry, but the anger doesn't come out. It's really really weird.

Now that all classes ended, I stand up and make my way to leave the room, but I hear Jungkook voice from behind calling my name:

"Y/n!" he says. I can feel the tension building up. "I-I wondered if I-I could walk you home..." he says rubbing the back of his head.

My head feels peace after that question. I know I can go home safely with him. I nod and smile brightly and I see his face lighting up.

As we walk down the street I see him a bit nervous. I'm too shy to ask if there's something wrong. But I guess that's what good friends do, so I decide to question him. But before I could say something, he speaks:

"Y/n...do you like him?" I see him blushing.

"Umh? Who?" I'm a bit confused. Who is he talking about?

"My brother..." he says almost whispering.

"WHAT?! Of course no!! I'm just grateful that he helped me earlier, but there's nothing more!" I shout instinctively and nervously.

I see his face muscles relaxing and his big smile appears.

"Good to know"

That smile makes me blush so hard, that I have to look away so that he doesn't see my red face. But I guess he noticed it anyway as I can hear him giggle.

Now we're in front of my house.

"Goodbye Jungkook! Thanks for taking me home. See you tomorrow!" I say turning around, but before I could walk away he grabs my wrist and I freeze.

"Y/n..." he says with his calm voice. I don't turn around. I just can't move my body. I feel his hand tightening the grip on my wrist and in just a blink I feel Jungkook back hugging me.

After a couple of seconds he lets go and I hear him stuttering:

"I-I'm sorry y-y/n! I-I didn't m-mean to..." as he says so I turn around as see him looking at the ground. It doesn't look like he's regretting his decision. I think he's daydreaming right now, like he's here in front of me, but his mind is on another dimension.

He's actually handsome. I don't know what I'm doing, but I think I'm looking at him under another prospective. Not as my classmate. Nether as my friend. Could it be...? No way, I'm not that type of girl that dreams these sort of things.

I just want to nod and get inside, but instead I say:

"Don't worry" and my body starts moving on its own and does something I would have never expected.

I'm hugging him. As I hug him I start to panic inside. WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU Y/N?! WHAT ARE YOU EVEN THINKING? I HAVE ALREADY ALLOWED MYSELF TO HAVE A NEW FRIEND, BUT THIS TIME I'M NOT ALLOWING THIS!!!

Then I slowly let go and look at him smiling. He seems surprised but he shows me his bunny smile right after. I don't want him to see me flustered and nervous, so I just keep smiling. Then I greet him, still smiling, and go inside. After closing the door behind me, I look through the window and see him going away.

Then my smile disappears and I just...

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" I scream as loud as I can.

"What's wrong y/n?!" my mum is running to me worried. She keeps asking me and shaking me, but I'm frozen. I have to admit it, that scream helped me. I feel so much lighter now.

As both my mum and dad are shaking me, I smile at the memory of a few moments ago. As I smile I realize. I'm doomed.

0 notes

speckeh · 6 years

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Speckeh’s 2018 Book List

It’s 2018! Last year my book list was a decent size but I didn’t read a lot of sparkling novels! So this year I’m focusing on decent books with the occasional textbook thrown in!

1. Cappiello: The Posters of Leonetto Cappiello: 5/5 stars. I haven’t had time to sleep more than 8 hours let alone time to breathe to read book this semester. I’ve never been busier which has been a nice experience, but boy do I miss reading books! I found this at Tuesday Morning 40% off and it’s huge and beautiful and needed it. I love this book! Cappiello has a wonderful drawing style. He draws multiple body shapes, various commercial posters, and GINGERS. HE DRAWS SO MANY BEAUTIFUL RED HAIRED LADIES. I’M SO FUCKING THRILLED. If you find this book hella cheap and have the shelf space for it, it’s a great art book to have!

2. The Elements of Rhetoric - How to Write and Speak Clearly: 4/5 stars. This is for my Proposal Writing and Development class. Everything this book states, I’ve already read or learned about in Argument Writing during summer last year so nothing really jumps out as me as amazing or eye opening. The writer does some relevant story telling with the different styles of rhetoric to use and how to use them effectively, but it’s not the greatest read. I’ll probably keep it as it’s a great little book for quick glossary terms or brushing up on information. If this is your jam, this might be a cheap book you can add to your academic shelf!

3-4. Kamisama Darling Vol 1 and 2: 5/5 stars.

5. Namae mo Shiranai Machiawase 4/5 stars

6. Star Trek Cats: 5/5 stars. I hung out with one of my quickly growing best friends yesterday and I saw this book when we were in the humor section. My heart MELTED. I read this as B&N and even though it’s short, I needed to buy it. It’s one of my favorite art humor books I’ve flipped through recently. It’s full of episode jokes and just fucking ADORABLE cats that make the weirdest faces.

7. The Prophet: 5/5 stars. Another book I bought with one of my best friends. It was recommended to me by the really nice (and very sweet) worker there who complimented me on my outfit. I was going to ask we could trade numbers and hang out and gain a new friend from her, but she was very busy. Anyways. The friend I was with told me he absolutely loved this book and it spoke to him on a spiritual level. And I have to agree. Having been raised in a mormon household and then realizing I was hella queer and questioned E V E R Y T H I N G about organized religions, this book was excellent. Because The Prophet isn’t any certain religion, he’s just giving people a way of life and he never condemns anyone or anything. The Prophet and the Siddhartha are essentially my religion. The whole belief there is no “set path” for a religious life and happy ending, that no one is right and no one is wrong in their religion, and that it depends on how you treat others and how you service others but also how you serve yourself. An excellent read for the beginning of the year for me.

8. The Non-Profit Narrative: 2/5 stars. It’s the same for the Elements of Rhetoric book I read, I’ve read all of these terms before in my nonprofit management class so nothing was very new or interesting to me. I skipped through 70% of the book. If you want a short, short ass book on how to run nonprofits and social media, this is a great little read. If you’re already familiar with the contexts of nonprofit, don’t waste your money.

9. When The Body Says No: 5/5 stars. This book is.. just wow. This is the first time I have ever marked up my own personal book with highlights, pens, and pencils. I only ever do it to copied school books on computer paper. It’s no secret I’ve been going to a counselor off and on since I’ve been 13. And I’ve seen and confronted death for a long time. I’m very traumatized from my experiences and I have a lot of issues I don’t really deal with. My counselor told me to read this book because I am the post child of when your body says no for you when you can’t. And I am. It’s.. amazing how well he knows me and my experiences I’ve been through. I learned amazing facts about myself how my childhood forced me into emotional repression, that children who lose a parent before 17 are 40% more likely to develop cancer, that the underlying stress of never being able to say no to your family because you don’t want to disappoint them causes a turmoil in your body that can turn deadly. If you have anger issues, stress disorders, genetic diseases, autoimmune disease, any sort of illness you developed later as an adult, read this book. Because I promise you, you’ll find something about you you never knew about.

10. The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao: 3/5 stars. This was a book I had to read for my intro to English literature class (I’m changing emphasis so I have to take more entry level classes BLEGH). While I did devour this book so fast, I wasn’t particularly impressed with this book. I guess I’m kind of sick of the narrative of “geeky boy is a virgin and hates himself and the world,” and people around him either patting his back or deciding to take it upon themselves to fix him, no matter what cultural background they are. While I’m thrilled I could read about a Dominican cultural and have a non-white narrative and characters, this book didn’t sparkle to me. Maybe it’s because this book wasn’t written for me, or maybe I don’t really care for Diaz’s writing style. Either way I barely earned a 3 stars from me.

11. Pictures of the Gone World: 4.5/5 Stars I bought this book at a liquidation sale. I either find amazing poetry books at random, or duds. Luckily this was a fantastic one that held a lot of elements I love in poems: historical themes and humor. He helped pushing and defend one of my new favorite poets, Allen Ginsberg so you know I have mad respect for him. This was his first poetry book and he quickly became famous in the beat poetry world. Compared to other poets, he’s definitely a easier one to get into for beginners but the words still hold beauty and harsh truths. Definitely a great way to introduce yourself to beatnik poetry!

12. I Capture The Castle: 5/5 stars. Do you ever pick up a book that’s been calling to you for ages and by the fifth page in you know you have a new best friend? I’m not one for first person narratives, it takes a special way of writing it to keep my interest. I Capture The Castle with repressed and writer’s voice of a 40 year old woman from 17 year old Cassandra just melted my heart. I have a soft spot for Dodie Smith and she won me over with this book. From the beautiful scenery of a decaying castle, to a 17 year old’s first encounter with love, it’s just so so captivating. it hasn’t been since the Shadow of the Wind that my heart literally raced and I couldn’t read fast enough to know what happened next. And the last sentence of Cassandra’s journal of “I love you, I love you, I love you,” keeps playing over and over in my head. If you want to get lost in a old English castle and a young girl’s narrative, you will not regret picking this book up.

13. A Concise History of Hawai’i: 3/5 Stars. I’ve always wanted to know about my birth state since we moved away when I was too young to remember anything. I’ve always been called a island girl and have had a fascination with water. I stopped being interested in calling Hawai’i my birth state because I was so young and my family memories are bitter sweet. But I finally returned to Hawai’i in May 2016, and I was shocked to feel like I was Home. I’ve been missing Hawai’i like crazy and have been trying to read this book forever. I bought it on my trip there. Well I finished it. It was pretty interesting, it’s concise, and quick and I learned a lot. But the book also brings up an important question.Can a white man write about a cultural history on Hawai’i? I’m not sure and I was somewhat bothered by that question throughout the book so that dampened my star rating. I feel like a history of Hawai’i would be so different and way more vibrating if a Native Hawaiian had written it. But, if you want a general and quick history of Hawai’i from the formation to 1999, it’s a decent read.

14. Wyoming Poems 1994: 5/5 Stars. I really like this short poetry book. It’s only 26 poems and all about Wyoming and the life there. It’s from 1995 so you know it’s more of a modern take on Wyoming. Definitely a great little book. Really debating on joining the Wyoming Writer’s mailing list ahah!!

15-21: Various Manga. between 3-5/5 stars.

22. Secret Garden: 10 minutes classics: 2/5 stars. I love the Secret Garden. It’s one of my top 5 books of all time in my life and will always be in the top 5. The 10 minute classic books is great for a reader wanting a short synopsis of the Secret Garden and it has lovely pictures, but it really loses the magic, the world building, and the characters’ relationships in just 10 minutes. I’ll probably keep the book just because of lovely pictures, but it was a let down!

23. Lovers Legends: The Gay Greek Myths. 4/5 stars. My love for reading and history can be pinpointed exactly to D’Aubaires’ Book of Greek Myths. It planted the seeds of my career ambitions, the types of research I love to conduct, and the person who I am. I always knew the Greeks were more gay than society teaches children, but this book really paints it simple for you. First off, it uses a poem by one of my favorites Allen Grinsberg, and then the author reiterates the gay greek myths in clear and easy stories, and shows how they all connect. The symposium style chapters were long and tedious and I ended up skipping them, and the book really only has 110 pages of stories with the next 80+ being sources, research, and a bibliography. Either way, love me some truth bomb gay ass greek myth!!

24. Colonel Brandon’s Diary: 4/5 Stars. I’m a sucker for Austen continuations or different perspectives. It comes from a personal reason from childhood memories with one of my parents. I’ve read 2 other of Amanda Grange’s diaries of Austen men. Brandon is not my favorite Austen hero and while the book I liked him enough, he doesn’t sparkle as much as say Knightley for me. I’m sure as I get older I may like him more, but for now it was nice to read a 300 page version of Sense and Sensibility that is a great companion novel for like.. better spark notes. If you need a quick summer read to last you a day or two, I highly suggest Amanda Grange’s books! (Except for Pride and Prejudice and Pyramids. That was just… bad)

25. Reunion by Fred Uhlman 5/5 Stars: I really started to enjoy World War II stories, but fictional ones about non-American centric stories. Reunion is a beautiful, fast read, about a teenaged Jewish boy who meets a handsome and captivating Lord’s son at his school. It really is about a first love. Hans is obsessed with Konradin; he thinks he’s handsome, educated, and lonely like him. The two go off on trips, Konradin often comes to his house, they read poetry and discuss coins together. It’s very easy to think of Konradin and Hans sharing firsts. It’s a beautiful little story that wrenched my gut with the very last line, and the descriptions had me drawing little scenes in the book. If you have 3-4 hours to spare, this is a great read if you can get it.

26. Instructions to a Young Bookseller: 5/5 Stars. As someone hoping to enter the book world after graduating University, this was a great little read. Obviously any sort of written conference has an edge of boring to it. But the book is full of gem quotes and advice that can be used for anything and not just young booksellers. If you’re able to find this book (most likely in the Heffer bookstore at Cambridge) give it a read. It’s a short 46 pages but a great way to pass the time and to give you advice that transcends passed 1933.

27. Among the Janeites: 2/5 Stars. I wasn’t impressed with this book, which is a shame because I desperately wanted to like this book. I loved when Yaffe described and told the stories of her fellow Janeites, but I really couldn’t stand her narration. I don’t know if it’s because I’m annoyed by the “I’m an elite Jane Austen fan because of these reasons” or I just don’t like the way she writes her narratives. Sometimes, you just don’t clash well with a author. I applaud her efforts to write this book, but I have to admit I was disappointed that she admitted she only focused on white North American Jane Austen fans. What a waste!! How amazing would it have been to have read more diverse fans? Hear about their efforts, their stories? Instead I found myself reading some of the same stories over and over again. I didn’t even finish the last two chapters because everything was the same rhythm and nothing was interesting any more. I wanted to put down the book many times, but found I couldn’t whenever I read the stories of those who did amazing things with their Jane Austen passions. But other than that, kind of disappointed I brought this book on my trip to England. :/

28. Tea with Mr. Rochester: 4/5 Stars. Sometimes a collection of short stories takes me awhile to read, this was not one of those!! I have had my eye on this book from Persephone’s for at least 2 years now, and I finally got to go to the shop two weeks ago! I really enjoy the literary metaphors and the descriptions are beautiful, but Towers has a way of writing that has you go: “..did.. did I skip a page?” Often the story would jump and you would feel confused of where the characters are now, how much time had passed, and how did these two characters meet. The lack of background, time, and setting is discombobulating, but not too distracting from enjoying it! If you have the pleasure of going to Persephone’s Book, definitely give this book a try!

29. For Your Eyes Only: 4/5 stars. I think I’m now a little more than halfway done with the original James Bond series! For Your Eyes Only is very different as these are short stories. Some of them are action pact while others are Bond at dinner parties listening to stories. It was an entirely new take and very interesting for sure! Some of the stories were hard to get through, slow, which is why I dropped it down to four stars, but a lot of them were really fun. I especially loved Quantum of Solace which explained the title and now I’m wanting to rewatch the film now knowing the definition of the phrase. I can tell that Ian Flemming is now aware of his homoerotic writing with James Bond and is starting to cut it out, which is a real shame since they’re so beautiful. But his obsession with eating eggs for nearly every meal is back which made me happy! I’ll have to see in the next book if the homoeroticness comes back!

30. This One Summer: 4/5 stars. Ranted and raved about since the debut of this comic, with one of my favorite illustrators who drew SuperMutant Magic Academy, an awarded comic! And I can’t help but feel disappointed in the story. I know this is directed at teens and if I had read this when I was between 13-16 it would have BLOWN my mind. Now at 23, this isn’t the most poignant story. I think it’s important for teens but it isn’t really for me. I’ll probably gift this comic to my friend Ramona because I think she will like this comic a lot. But for me it’s just.. beautiful artwork. But nothing much more than that.

31. The Alchemist: 3/5 stars The Alchemist was suggested to me by my BFF and my other friend told me he hated it. I’m in between. While I understand why some people absolutely LOVE this book and I appreciate that the author had a passion for his story and didn’t settle for rejection, I think the story is lacking a lot of magic and luster it could have had. It’s kind of like a book trying to follow after The Little Prince in an Arabic/South American story with a christian spin to it. I enjoyed reading it and experiencing a well loved story, but I gave it to another friend and I kind of regret buying it from a story and not borrowing it from a library.

32. Omae no Koi wa Ore no Mono: 5/5 stars. Good manga. Lovely characters. Story is good. I enjoyed it thoroughly!

33. The Fall of America: 4/5 stars. Allen Ginsberg is my second favorite poet right behind Billy Collins. After reading Howl and falling in love with everything, this book was a let down. A lot of the poems were loooong run ons that seemed to forget what he was trying to talk about. My favorites were when he was un-ashamedly GAY and talking about sucking cock and having sex with guys, and a very real Vietnam war poem, but the rest was very on the fence. If I didn’t love him so much I would have skipped a lot of the poems in this book. But I also know this is a similar complaint from other readers. It’s hard to follow after such a massive success and nationally known poetry book of Howl, but he did his best. Not all of your own poems will be sparkling and rich in something new and world opening.

34-36. Various Manga: 34 5/5 stars, 35 4/5 stars, 36 4/5 stars.

37. Twisted Romance Volume 1: 2/5 stars. While some of the stories were beautiful and drawn amazing, I felt like the collection was disjointed and didn’t go very well. It was weird to have a comic book also be split up between stories with a written novel. I’m sure this would be someone’s cup of tea, but not mine.

38. My Lesbian Experience with Loneliness: 4/5 stars. My dear friend Ramona put the first and second novel in front of me to read while we spent like 4 hours at Barnes and Noble today. It was super fun to be with my sweet sweet friend and just, decompress. I read this book and so much of it I could relate to. Not only am I a Queer female, but I also struggle with mental health, depression, and feelings of abandoning my mother. Not to mention being touch starved. But I docked it down from a perfect score because Kabi’s narrative was so frustrating. That never ending cycle of getting so close and then self-sabotaging herself is so frustrating and makes me mad. I put the book back after I finished reading it, and then decided I had to buy it at the last moment.

39. My Solo Exchange Diary (Sexual to My Lesbian Experience with Loneliness) Vol 2: 3/5 stars. Unlike the first book, this was even more frustrating and was hard for me to be empathetic to her. Someone who obviously struggled hard with her mental health and struggle against her parents, I felt like her Solo Exchange Diary was just an excuse to not do what she wanted. I didn’t think Kabi grew much between the two volumes which is super disappointing. As a reader you want her to be better. Though when she mentioned how her happiness is tied to abandoning her mom, OOFFFF. THAT SURE IS MEEE.

40. Close Range: 2/5 stars. I actually stopped reading this book entirely. I started off reading the Brokeback Mountain story in this anthology, and it hooked me! Sadly, the rest of the stories didn’t capture me as much as BM. Eventually the characters bled to be the same: stoic, struggling with family, very Wyoming. That was it. It was all men, white men who struggle to be “men” and then proceed to do stupid shit/hurtful things that you want them to die over. I lost interest and I’m sad because I wanted to love this collection, but I couldn’t do it anymore.

41. Bond By Design: 5/5 Stars. Back in 2016, Shennelly gave me a mini version of this book and for Christmas last year I got the full version. It’s fascinating to see the drawing progression and what the art team focuses on drawing. It’s a shame to see the Daniel Craig films not having as much hand drawn art, but they were created more in the era of computer art and less relying on storyboard sketches. Needless to say, it was pretty awesome to see all the thumbnails and knowing a lot of them came to life in the films I watched! P.s. I went to the museum and Turner painting features in Skyfall over the summer!

42. The Hobbit Comic: 4/5 stars. This is a comic I’ve had on my shelf before I started uni so around 3-4 years it’s been sitting on my shelf waiting to be read. I picked it up because I was going on a car trip and I wanted something light and easy for the 4 1/2 hours it took to reach our destination. While the art was awesome, this was not a light read. It felt like reading the Hobbit all over again with how exact dialogue and scenes were written out. And I docked this comic down a star because I felt like I would be so overwhelmed by the reading I couldn’t enjoy the art. That’s a big problem with direct story comics. They’re so much dialogue and story they want to use, they don’t realize how tedious it becomes for a reader. Other than that, if you’re a die hard LOTR fan, this is a great edition fo the Hobbit to have!

43. The Adventure Zone - There Be Gerblins! 5/5 stars. I started listening to The Good Brothers after Percy told me to back at the end of 2016. I started to their The Adventure Zone podcast right before my trip to Norway. I have great memories of listening to the first 3 adventures, nodding off on the plane, during down time at our various hotels, on the way back home, desperately trying to download as many possible while I had wifi. I love TAZ and so when they announced a comic book a year ago, I’ve been waiting ever since! It isn’t a let down! Where the Hobbit had issues with too much dialogue, TAZ There be Gerblins didn’t run into that issue! Also I love that even though the characters have never been officially designed, there was opportunity for diversity, AND THEY DID A TON OF DIVERSITY. Also the Director was exactly how I envisioned her and that made me so fucking happy. Please support the good boys and buy the comic if you like it!

44. Monstress Vol 3: 5/5 stars. While the art is dynamic, the plot hella feminist, interesting, so many cool female characters! The plot is still confusing volume 3 in. I might have reread the other two before reading the 3rd since it has been a year since I’ve read the book. But the darkness and “real” themes of disabilities and responsibilities is just great!

45. The White Cat: and two other stories: 5/5 stars. The art for this children’s fairytale book is gorgeous. Though some of the pictures feel like they’re a few pages behind or ahead of the events that actually happened. But JEEZ you guys! These are some fucking dark stories. A cat behead, Jack the Giant Killer, Rip Van Winkle just being lazy as FUCK. We don’t get children’s stories like this. It was an awesome edition I found that was originally 30 dollars that was for sale for 5 dollars due to a liquidation sale. It’s great.

46. The Young Visitors or Mr. Salteena’s Plan: 5/5 stars. The Young Visitors is such a treat. I first found my copy in England in a discount shelf and loved the frayed pink cover with interesting illustrations. And then at another going out of business sale, I found a red cover and bought it without thinking much of it. I absolute LOVE this book. This story is written by a 9 year old Daisy with the themes of a true Victorian novel. An older man chasing after a young woman who falls in love with a rich young man and the older man cries at his defeat. It’s an excellent little read that is amazing from being written in 1919! I have plans to eventually see the manuscript in the museum it’s held in! I’m using my second copy as a lend out to my friends to make sure they’ve read this story!

47. What Makes My Cat Purr? : 5/5 stars My friend bought this for me at an antique mall because it melted my heart. Reasons why little kittens purr???? Mostly because you show them love??? UHHH HOW CAN YOU NOT LOVE THIS NOVEL?

48. Sock Monkey - The Glass Knob: 4/5 Stars. Sock Monkey and his friends ned to replace the door handle with glass and a random assortments. Silly, but sweet.

49. The Paper Doll Wedding: 4/5 Stars. Fun. That’s all.

50. Spot’s Favorite Colors: 4/5 Stars. Bought this for my nephew. We used to have matching cards with this!

51. That’s Not My Dinosaur: 4/5 Stars. For my nephew! He loooves it. Touch and feel.

52. The Mitten: 5/5 Stars. This book was read to us each winter in elementary school. I bought it for my nephew!

53. Toot: 4/5 Stars. For my nephew! A book about farts!

54. Erte Art: 4/5 Stars. Erte’s art which was dazzling and seemed to be something from the 2000s rather than the 1900s. Loved the different designs of his work and that he included women of color and not just white models throughout his work!

55. Sea Prayer: 4/5 Stars. Everyone was ranting and raving about the poetry, but I love the watercolors. It was an impactful story, but I felt the story was a bit rushed. Over all beautiful.

56. The Prince and the Dressmaker: 5/5 Stars. I’ve had this comic book in my shopping cart for a year! I finally asked for it at B&N and bit the bullet. UHMMMM. GORGEOUS.

57. HeartStopper Vol. 1: 5/5 Stars. UHM WOW. I funded this on kickstarter without really knowing much about the comic. It then sat on my shelf for a couple of months and a friend, randomly, asked me if I read it. I finally read it and goooood, I loooooved it!!!

58. Fuddles: 3/5 stars. A fat cat gets out of the house and lost, I hated it but loved the illustration.

59. Birdsong: 5/5 Stars. All the different birds and songs they sing, silly, fun.

60. Santa’s Snow Cat: 4/5 Stars. A silly Christmas story about how Santa loses his most beloved cat in New York.

61. The Tiger: 5/5 Stars. A dialogue-less comic about a tiger in the jungle, living its life, trying to hunt prey (unsuccessfully), and other predators. Beautiful art, I would recommend!

62. The Angel’s Game: 2.5/5 stars. Sadly, this is the second time I’ve been disappointed by Carlos. Angel’s game had a slow start. A writer being worked to death by underpaying publishers until he develops a brain tumor. He meets a mysterious man after much travesty and agrees to write him a book with no money as an issue. But as the story progresses, the narrator becomes distressed and stupid to discover the truth. He loses so much, and by the end of the book it feels like a bad fever dream. It really seems the hype after Shadow of the Wind is so hard to defeat. Hopefully his newest, final, and largest book in the quad series will be like the first. Let’s hope it’s not like the middl two!

63: Ore no Omawarisan: 5/5 stars

64: Goriyou wa Keikakuteki ni: 4/5 stars.

65. The Shotgunner: 3/5 stars. As I was trying to compile my favorites of 2018, I realized I completely missed three books?? Shotgunner was finished the last day of 2018 and I think I was just totally exhausted from everything. The book was extremely silly but fast paced. A man wanted for murder runs back to his home town to find his brother has been murdered and his widow (an old fling) needs his help to get out of town. It doesn’t end how you think it would and it seemed to move in a very fast paced way. It wasn’t my favorite western book I’ve read, but it certainly had layers to it I wasn’t expecting!

#2018 books

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requiemofkings · 7 years

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@lio-zehel OFC U WOULD REQUEST CATS AHAH ILY LIO but sry i couldnt do the 2nd prompt! idk how to fit that into 2 panels or less

@harmonicplanet i too would be confused with neil in heart shaped glasses

@permanentchaos neil would be wary of disneyland at first but then hed find himself enjoying it- hes been deprived of a childhood. they all had lets be real. andrew would hate it but he stays bc neil is happy!! i totally want to draw the twinyards but lets save that for another time

if i didnt draw ur request yet, have no fear! ive seen them, ill get to them hopefully! if u requested more than 2 characters, it will take a longer time

#andreil #andrew minyard #neil josten #the foxhole court #all for the game #my art #AHH ITS 3AM #WHAT AM I DOING?!?!?!?

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boo1a4 · 7 years

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8 Questions Tag!

Hello guys!! so Im back for yet another tag this week aha! I was tagged by mor @sambashua to do my nightmare tag the question creation portion kills me everytime but I think I did alright this time around with a lil help from some of y'all! so basically you answer the person who tagged you question, then you make up 8 of your own for the people you tag to answer and the rinse and repeat~~~

Mir’s Questions!

1. what’s your favorite bridge in a song? (i know this is so difficult but i thought narrowing it to the bridge might help?? but back 2 u’s is honestly so good)

Omg Mir this is evil, I think I'm gonna go tho dwc cause that rap break and Hannies vocals kill me, its the part of that song that really does it for me without it I think the song would just be kind of lackluster for me tbh. also all of back 2 you is so good like ???

2. how many spoons can you balance on your face? (photo evidence is optional)

omg no I hate you. jkjk Ill do it and send you a snap the rest of the world doesn't need to see this.😂😂😂

3. the ingredients you would put in your ideal smoothie are….

literally any fruit/suitable veggie(jeno) besides bananas, I hate bananas 🤢.

4. what was the defining moment that made your ult bias your bias?

its been a long ass ride tbh, I didn't call boo my ub for a long time cause I was like he's not like my other biases?? but I think thats because he's my ub that he's just feels diff then the rest. I'm not exactly sure when it happened but it was just a combo of all the hilarious and precious things he does?? my fave thing about him is his ablitily to take criticism well and his humor. He's a v admirable young man and I wish could be more like him! he's also so caring I'm crying rn just thinking about it. But I say that I wish I could be more like him but in reality we are very similar and I think thats why I like him so much I relate with him and see myself in him??? for me with boo its not a relationship kind of thing (although he'd make the best partner ever tf) Its like I'm constantly rooting for him to succeed because in a way its seeing someone like me succeed! ahah that was a little long winded and deep oops I'm sorry!

5. would you change your eye color if you could? if so what color? (it can be natural or not have fun w it lol)

I like my natural eye color one of them is more green then the other its nice! but purple eyes like the Targaryen’s in asoiaf would be lit as hell also dragons so???

6. what are your favorite physical and personality traits of your top bias(es)? (alternatively just your fave picture of our bias if you can’t pick actually just include your fave picture bc why not)

um I'm doing both cause necessary, I'm doing my top 2 cause I'm trash aha

Boo - HIS CHEEKS THERE IS NOTHING BETTER ALSO THIS (he's wearing an mn timberwolves jacket for me I'm tearing!!) boo also has great legs I'm envious tbh. I just love his hort and above ^^

Bri- ok so my fav physical trait of Bri is his nose, Im a HO for a good nose and his bridge in incredible this this this this I'm also a ho for blond bri. He's just fucking hot and that it every part of him is ideal I suffer everyday also here are some fancams cause ppl need to suffer with me js this this this this this also all of his selfies are art. He's a life ruiner tbh. But as much as I talk about suffering at his hands aha he's the sweetest boy ever like when he hears my days singing its the best thing in life, he's also very driven and hard working and that is very admirable imo.

omg I swear my ub is boo

7. do you have a go-to video to make you laugh/cheer you up?

Ok so I know I've talked you about this before Mir but Jenna and Julian I'm just gonna link you a few because the a relationship goals and pure goodness and sunshine also meme af this this this this this nothing can cheer me up more efficiently!

8. end w your favorite quote/emoji/emoticon(ﾉ´ヮ`)ﾉ*: ･ﾟ

(ﾉ´ヮ`)ﾉ*: ･ﾟMARKHYUCK

My Questions!

1. Ok so I’m gonna steal one of the questions that Mir answered in hers and its is if you could have any idols hairstyle past or present whose would you choose?

2. If you could take your bias group or just your bias and put them into another universe i.e. wizarding world or similar what world would you but them in? And why?

3. Fave idol outfit? doesn’t have to be your bias just any outfit you’ve liked! Provide pictures if you want!

4. Favorite fancams? Im a fancam ho I need recs plx.

5. What are your favorite girl group non title songs, if you don’t have any what are your favorite gg mvs?

6. ok so this was a question Claudent made up in another 8 questions tag that I just love she a brilliant bean! But if you could create your own group drawing from all other groups regardless of companies who would you choose and what would there concept be?

7. so you are going to a music festival and in this dream world you get to decide all the ppl/groups that are going to be there, who would you choose? It doesn’t just have to be Kpop!

8. If you could have any talent in the world what would you want it to be? I would want to be in anyway musically inclined rip me tbh.

and thats all I'm tagging @yooncheoly @kae-popx @s-lay-ing @king-hao @insecure-trash-bag @spasticstars @citruseungkwan y'all don't have to do this tho I know the question creation part is kind of annoying ahah but if you want to thats awesome! also anyone who wasn't tagged that want to do this do it and say I tagged you I wanna see your answers!

#tags #thanks for the tag mmmmmiiiiiiiirrrrrrrrrrrrrr #this took me like ridiculously long???#feel free to do this or not everyone who was tagged!

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