#is it sad to see everyone move on?? yes but also rip to them but i'm different

[veethefreeelf]

How many chances are too many chances? Y.JH

This is part 2 to ‘How many times does it take to get smarter?’ Get ready for a rollercoaster of emotions and I’M SORRY ฅ՞•ﻌ•՞ฅ

Summary: 

It’s been 6 months since the night you and Jeonghan went your separate ways. You’re sure he has moved on and you… are working on moving on. Nothing can go wrong, right?

Wordcount: 14k (SORRY)

Warnings: pussy slapping, some spanking, slut is used a lot, oral f. receiving (face-sitting), vaginal penetration - unprotected sex, Jeonghan is hot and bossy - dom af, cream-pie, slight dumbification 

Requested: yes, by popular demand 

P.S - Italic is for thoughts mainly from the characters’ perspective and quotes. Bold is for text messages/calls/voice messages between characters

It’s been 6 months since you had seen each other. Since you told him everything you had been holding back for years and he walked away from you. He walked away from your friendship as if everything you two had shared over the years had been meaningless. As if you were replaceable.

You were doing okay. In the first few weeks you had cried yourself to sleep. You even destroyed all the pictures you had with him like a teenager in a movie. But eventually, it started getting easier. Waking up and not getting a single text from him or call during the day got easier. You started getting used to the silence.

You had also put the pictures you ripped apart back together. Very clumsily but you tried. You loved some of those pictures and they contained some of your very favorite memories with him and all the boys. You couldn’t get rid of it. You couldn’t also look at them so after you fixed them, you decided they would now live in a permanent corner in your closet in a box and hopefully, one day, you’ll be able to look at them again and smile.

In these 6 months, things have been going well with everything else in your life. You got a promotion. You and your family had been closer than ever and you had great friends who had helped you put everything behind you. Well… most of your friends.

Some of them, like the one calling you right now, wanted nothing more but for the both of you ‘to stop being fucking idiots and be together’. It’s been a struggle balancing seeing the boys and not seeing Jeonghan. You had mostly skipped all of your usual gatherings because you knew he would be there. You knew you would be the one losing the boys. They had been friends for far longer than you had been in their lives, so when a falling out like this happens, of course, you would be the one that would walk away.

This however, has made all the boys very annoyed. They have all called you at some point to tell you they were angry at you and wanted you back with them. ‘It isn’t fair’ they kept telling you.

You agree. Nothing about this is fair. It’s sad. For everyone. Everyone lost something, somehow and you blame yourself for it.

You should answer the phone though, otherwise, the boy known as your twin would cause absolute mayhem in all of your lives. He has already threatened you about it enough times for you to know he would do it without hesitation.

“Hello, Kwannie. Calling in the middle of the day is not very on brand for you. You good?” you asked.

“I’m amazing. I am calling you in the middle of the day because you have decided to ignore Soonyoung and he is now pouting and making my life hell. I have many questions. Number one: How dare you?” Seungkwan is the first one they use when they want something from you. Fair enough. Not even you want to deal with the anger of your friend.

“Kwannie… Now, now… That’s no way to speak to me even if you are using Office quotes which I very much appreciate” you said with a teasing tone.

“Haha very funny, Y/N. You have been hilarious in the past 6 months, you know that? Amazing. And as much as I would LOVE for you to continue being this way, I am the one that has to deal with the consequences of you ghosting all of us” he stated in an incredibly monotonous tone. You know what’s coming next and it’s mostly why you have avoided them all.

“Seungkwan, I haven’t ghosted any of you. I’m busy, you know that… That’s all…” you said in your best apologetic tone.

He laughed dryly and added: “You can’t be serious. I know you’re busy, promotion and all. But you also know after everything that happened, communication between us and you has been extremely difficult. You barely show up to any of our usual outings, you don’t speak in the group chat. Look… I get it, I do. But we shouldn’t all be punished because one of us is a complete idiot, and I know you know that too”.

You knew he was right, they didn’t deserve any of it. It wasn’t their fault. But how can you just show up to things with Jeonghan there? How can you join in the group chat with everyone while you know you have his number blocked and deleted everything related to him on your phone? 

You had done a pretty good job moving on in every other part of your life. But not here, not with the boys. You didn’t know how. You hadn’t found that balance yet and you weren’t sure you were ready to see him yet. Or at all.

“Your silence is deafening, Y/N” Seungkwan spoke on the other side of the line.

“I’m sorry… You know I am but… I’m not ready, Seungkwan. And to be honest, I’m not sure I ever will be” you said sadly.

“Hey… We’re your friends too, you know? Don’t push us away, please. Not anymore. That’s all we’re asking. Well… Soonyoung is also asking for you to come to his party this Saturday. The guys’ performance team was picked to go to the international competition and he wants you there to celebrate. We all do”.

Seungkwan always knew what to say to get you to cave. It was why everyone called you twins, you always knew what to say to get the other one to do whatever you wanted, no matter what. 

“They made it? That’s fucking amazing. Tell them--”

“Tell them yourself, Y/N. Saturday. Soonyoung’s place. 8:30. Not gonna lie to you. He’ll be there. But you don’t have to interact with him. It will be a big party and I won’t leave your side. Promise.” he interrupted you but you get it.

You’re not sure if you should go. This doesn’t sound like a good idea at all. But you miss them. All of them. Hanging out like before, playing beer pong, letting Seungkwan destroy everyone at Karaoke…

“And this has nothing to do with your personal interest in beating Shua and Vernon at beer pong, Boo Seungkwan?” you asked to lighten the mood a bit.

“Well… If your falling out with Jeonghan gives me the opportunity to pair up with you after all these years, finally, and destroy them… I call that an added bonus!” he said jokingly.

“Is there a theme? Hoshi always has a theme…” you asked.

“College. Yes, I know… Don’t ask. He said college and everyone went with it” he said with a distaste but you know he loves Hoshi more than he would like to admit. Even if he swore to keep calling him Soonyoung out of spite.

“And, if I go, which by the way, I am not saying that I will… You won’t leave my side? The whole night?” you asked and he reassured you right away.

“Of course. I promise. He won’t have a chance to talk to you, I’ll keep him away. I would also volunteer to take your phone but we both know you have him blocked so that’s not going to be necessary”. 

Weird. You haven’t told anyone you blocked Jeonghan. I mean, it’s an easy assumption to make but he seemed confident when he said it. You wondered how he knew.

After you promised you would think about it and heard Hoshi cheering in the background, you talked a bit more about your lives and what has been going on and you hung up after a while of catching up.

You spent the rest of your Sunday thinking about this. You know Seungkwan will keep his promise and you know this isn’t a trap but… you’re not ready to see him.

You don’t know if you’ll be strong enough not to speak to him. Sure, you haven’t spoken to him in the last 6 months but you have thought about unblocking him multiple times. Maybe going to this party is not the best idea.

Friday night comes at you fast. You were so busy the whole week that the week flew by and you are now panicking about tomorrow. You hadn’t thought about this party most of the week, you hadn’t had time and here you were. In front of your closet, trying to pick clothes that say ‘college’ apparently and wondering if you should even go at all.

You know if you called any one of them right now and told them you weren’t going, they would collectively be mad at you and even plot to get you there somehow.

It’s too late to back out. You’re going tomorrow. And… you’ll be fine. Seungkwan will be with you and you will hang out with the boys and you will ignore him. 

You started laughing out loud. Ignore him? Please, you want to think you are so important in his life but if you were, he wouldn’t have left you the way he did. He probably doesn’t care that you’re going. Why would he even want to speak with you? Leaving was his choice. 

After 30 minutes of hurting yourself and staring at your closet, you start getting several messages from all the boys. You knew it. They weren’t going to let you out of this one and they had decided to collectively torture you. Using Shua and Vernon’s emotional blackmail was a bit much but you knew they were throwing everything at you to make sure you were going.

You pulled out your regular college outfit and set it in your chair next to your bed, made yourself some warm tea and went to the couch to binge a show. ‘Hopefully the tea and the show will make me fall asleep’ you thought.

You were wrong. You barely slept. You kept moving around in bed, trying to fall asleep. Heart beating out of your chest. You don’t know how you’ll survive this.

You decided to keep busy the whole day. It had worked during the week so you went to visit your sister and see your nephew. He would keep you occupied. He had brought a light into your life you didn’t know could be there and you know he will always keep you entertained and you will do the same for him.

This had all gone well until your sister tells you they have a birthday party to attend at 4:30 so you’d have to leave pretty soon.

Great. Of course. 

As soon as you got home, you got a FaceTime call from Lily. 

Lily was your best friend since middle school. You had been through everything together and you were as close as sisters. You had introduced her to the boys shortly after you had met them and she fit right in. Not only that but she fell in love. She and Seungcheol have been together since they met. ‘Love at first sight’ they both said. You had always been jealous of that. It had always been so easy for them. Meeting, falling in love, growing together. You were also unbelievably happy for them, especially Lily. She deserved the world.

“Let me guess… Outfit check?” you asked after answering the call.

“Duh! Let me see what you chose! We could match tonight. It’s been such a long time since we wore matching outfits, Y/N! Since college actually, which is the theme. Do you see how perfect this is???” she asked excitedly.

“There’s a reason why we haven’t done that since college, Lil” you laughed. 

“Oh come on! It would be hilarious!” she tried to convince you.

“Seungcheol left you high and dry, huh? So now you come to me for a matching outfit? Your second choice, really? Hmm… Not very convincing, I must say” you started teasing her.

“Hey, it’s not my fault you are both boring…” she said pouting.

“Look, I already picked it out. You’re not gonna like it, so Seungcheol is probably your best option between the two of us” you laughed as you warned her.

You knew her taste, she had always been way braver than you when it came to outfits for parties and, only on special occasions, did you let her win and change your whole outfit. This is definitely not one of those times. She knew that too.

“Fine. Don’t need either of you. See you there. Will be mad” she said and hung up on you.

You knew the game, she’ll pretend to be angry but by the time the party starts and you’re there she has already forgotten and all the love comes back immediately.

It was still fairly early. 5PM. You had 3 and a half hours to kill. You were tired. You had barely slept. ‘A nap it is’ you thought.

It sounded like a great idea and it felt like a great idea until you woke up and realized you had forgotten to set your alarm. It was now 9PM and your phone was blowing up.

Everyone was pissed. Damage control. Call Hoshi. He seemed the angriest from all the texts and missed calls you had. You explained it to him and told him you will be there. He sounded skeptical but he finally let you off the phone to get ready.

You had gotten ready in record time and managed to get to the party before 10PM. 

As soon as you walked in, you felt at home. You missed this. So much. Too much.

You hear several screams and noise and you know you've been spotted.Seungkwan and Hoshi rush over to you being the loudest people in the room as usual.

“You boys sure know how to make a girl feel welcome” you tell them with a big smile.

“Took you long enough. The beer pong tournament will start soon. Start drinking, warm-up. Come on, Y/L/N. This is THE YEAR” Seungkwan tells you.

“Quiet, Seungkwan. This is the outfit you chose, really?” Hoshi looks you up and down.

“How dare you? I spent most of my college years in this sporty outfit. I look amazing, thank you very much” you stated and squinted your eyes at him.

“You also didn’t get laid often in college did you, Y/N?” he asked cockily.

“Well, not all of us can be the slut of the campus, Hoshi. You earned that title, very early on” you teased him.

“I missed you… Never disappear again, we will all chase you down” Hoshi said sincerely.

“Yeah. yeah. Emotional get together, we are all in tears, wow. Now, let’s go, Y/N. We need to destroy them. Warm up” Seungkwan interrupted your moment with Hoshi. 

Suddenly, you see out of the corner of your eye movement towards you three. 

 Shua, Vernon and Seokmin are all running towards you. Seokmin picks you up and spins you around very excitedly.

“Is this a rom-com in the nineties? Put her down, Seokmin, we all missed her and want a well deserved hug” Shua said.

You hugged the three boys. Vernon didn’t say a word, just gave you a knowing nod. Very typical. 

“Congratulations on the promotion, Y/N! We all heard about it and we are so happy for you. You worked so hard, you earned it” Seokmin said while holding your hand.

“Yeah, we wanted to take you out to celebrate but… it’s been hard reaching you most of the time” Vernon said looking in your eyes. There it is. The guilt trip. You deserved this and they knew who to choose to make you feel that way.

“I know, Hansol. I’m sorry. I’ll be better from now on. Promise” you said sincerely. 

While you were all silent, sharing this moment, a scream, more like a screech, echoed through the party and you all looked in it’s direction.

Lily. Yup. Very obvious. She is walking as fast as she can in her heels towards you with a huge smile on her face and with Seungcheol right behind her.

And there he was. Right behind Seungcheol. Walking in your direction. 

And he wasn’t alone. Of course. Next to him was this cute, small girl with big eyes. She looked so innocent and small. Just his type.

All of your worries disappear. He’s not going to talk to you. He never cared. You truly had been such a fool for so long. You wonder how you never saw through it. It doesn’t matter. You decide to focus on the people in front of you that truly love you and are so happy to see you.

“You were right about the outfit. I hate it” Lily says after hugging you and dropping her smile.

You rolled your eyes. 

“Yeah, yeah, it’s the reason I didn’t get laid in college. You’re too late for that joke, Lil. But thanks, for the clear and unconditional support on your side, as usual” you said annoyed.

“Come on… It’s not the only reason… Your resting bitch face and bombastic side eye were the main reasons you didn’t get laid in college” she said and everyone laughed.

“Okay, it’s been nice seeing you all. Leaving now. See you all in a year” you started to turn away.

“No way you’re leaving. It’s been months, you owe us this. Better bring your A-game tonight, Y/N. Some of us aren’t in a merciful mood” Seungcheol pulled you back into the group.

“That’s all you got for me, Seungcheol? You’re getting soft” you said, challenging him.

“It’s your fault. Left me all alone with all of them. You brought this on yourself” he said, narrowing his eyes at you.

“Hi, Y/N. Congratulations on the promotion” Jeonghan spoke, almost whispering. He sounded nervous. 

Everyone whipped their heads around to look at Jeonghan and then you. They kept looking between the two of you. Some of them expected you to blow up and some of them expected you to be polite and cordial. You surprised all of them.

You looked away from Jeonghan without speaking a word. You turned to Seungkwan and locked your arm with his.

“So? Lead me to our victory, partner. Or should I replace you before we even start?” you asked him.

“Absolutely not, you’re mine. We’re gonna destroy all of you. Prepare yourselves” he stared at Vernon, Shua and Seungcheol specifically.

Then he led you towards the alcohol. You were extremely thankful for him.

Seungkwan might have met Jeonghan before he met you but there was a reason everyone said you must have been twins in another life. He suffered the way you did, his reactions were similar. Your side eyes? Unmatched. The only thing you were mainly different was in pettiness. He had the ability to be much more petty and cruel if needed than you. Until tonight. 

Seungkwan was proud of you. Maybe it didn’t look polite but Jeonghan had ripped your heart out, put it through a blender and served it back to you on a silver platter. You owed him nothing. He made his choice when he left you and he is reaping the consequences.

Hoshi and Seungcheol stood on top of the living room table and warned everyone:

“Beer pong tournament starts in 30 minutes. Sign up with your partners now!”

“Keep drinking, warm up, I’ll sign us up. We got this!” Seungkwan tells you immediately.

He was way too excited for this but you understand him and everyone else. It had been far too long since you had all been together, relaxing like this, having fun. And it had been even longer since the beer pong partners had changed.

Usually, you and Jeonghan were always a team. The cheater and the angel who convinces everyone their moves are within regulation due to some unchecked loophole. Shua and Vernon, the americans. Always a team. Always made it to the finals against you and Jeonghan. Seungcheol and Hoshi were always a team. An unlikely one but one that always worked. Seungkwan always forced Woozi to be his partner even though Woozi just wanted to be left alone. Everyone else was pretty okay partnering up with whomever was available and they didn’t put too much effort into fighting everyone for a partner. Mingyu and Wonwoo, Seokmin and Dino, and lastly, Jun and Minghao. They were the good ones. The ones that played for fun only. At least in this game.

This time around, Woozi finally thought he would get some peace but Jeonghan was forced to pick him since obviously you would not be pairing up with him. 

You joined everyone around the table and started a conversation with Lily who always got bored watching you guys compete. Well, until Seungcheol started to lose, then she got mad at everyone. It was adorable. 

You could overhear Jeonghan trying to convince Woozi to join him and at that moment a voice you did not know breaks you out of focus.

“Hi! I’m Haneul! Jeonghan invited me here tonight. The guys are pretty close, huh? Wanted to see if I could join you girls while they play and maybe find out a few secrets about Jeonghan” she giggled.

Lily looked at you and then back at Haneul. 

“Hi, Haneul. I’m Lily. This is Y/N. We met the boys in college. Or, Y/N met some of them in college and then we all got put together into this insane group. How do you know Jeonghan?” She asked her. 

She really knew you inside and out. She knew you weren’t going to speak a word to this girl and at the same time, you wanted to know everything about her. You hated it. You hated him. He made you this way. This poor girl had done nothing to you, yet here you were hating everything about her for absolutely no rational reason.

“Oh, from work. I just started at the company and I got assigned to Jeonghan’s team. He’s such a great guy--”

You walked away. Nope. Not tonight. You worked hard to get over him. You knew this would be a reality one day. Sure, you thought it would happen much later but you have to face it now. He’s here with someone he thinks is worthy of him and that he clearly wants to have a serious relationship with. He never brings anyone around the boys unless he means it. And she was so perfect for him. Your complete opposite.

You want to vomit. You hate this. You hate it here. How are you supposed to play a game and have fun when this is happening? It was way too soon. You shouldn’t be here, you knew. You knew this was a mistake. You started thinking of ways out. Trying to find a way to sneak out, turn off your phone and hope in the morning, the boys feel forgiving.

“Stop trying to figure out a way to sneak out” Seungcheol spoke beside you. 

“How did you know?” you asked him, sounding sad.

“Because if I were you, I’d be thinking about the exact same thing” he answered and put his arm around you to comfort you.

“I missed you, Cheolie” you said, resting your head on his shoulder.

He kissed the top of your head and asked “Is that why we barely spoke these last few months?”

“Not you too, Cheolie…” you said as you moved away from him.

“Come on, you know we have to. You disappeared. You both said your… ‘situation’ wasn’t going to change anything but it changed everything. You both deserve the shit you’re being handed by all of us” he said as he sipped his beer.

“So you’re giving him shit, too?” you asked, also sipping your drink.

“Oh he’s got it so much worse than you, Y/N. You have no idea the kind of pain we unleash on him on a daily basis” he said and smiled at you.

You knew he meant it too.

“Good. He’s earned it” you said and you both laughed.

“LET US BEGIN!” Hoshi yelled at the top of his lungs.

He jump scared everyone in the room and Seungkwan was ready for murder. Poor Mingyu had to hold him back from Hoshi as Hoshi ran off laughing as loudly as possible.

‘Some things never change’ you thought to yourself.

The tournament started and everything was going well. You were distracted and having fun, finally. And Seungkwan never left your side. Well… that’s not entirely true, but every time he did, he made sure one of the boys was there to prevent you from running away. 

You and Seungkwan had made it to the Semi-finals. A place Seungkwan had never been in all of these tournaments. He always blamed the cheaters but now here you were. And you were going to face Jeonghan and Woozi in the semi-finals.

Of course. You looked up and sighed. The universe really enjoys watching you suffer. It’s like it knows how much you love competitive Jeonghan and has decided to torture you even more. Because it’s not enough he looks that good and it wasn’t enough when he walked towards you with a little girlfriend behind him, no. That wasn’t enough. You needed to suffer more.

Seungkwan grabs you by the shoulders and makes you stare at him.

“A little creepy, don’t ya think?” you asked him and laughed.

“Stop laughing. Look at him. I want you to put your pain to use” he said, and almost growled at you.

“Excuse me?” you asked, but you knew what he was going to say next.

“He brought a girl here. Look at her. Very cute. Just his type, isn’t she? And, he barely tried speaking to you. Get angry, let’s destroy him” he told you while staring at you.

“Seriously, Seungkwan? That’s low” you said.

“You know what’s low? Knowing you were coming and bringing her. Use it. I need this win, Y/N and so do you” he said as he let go of your shoulders and started focusing on your adversaries.

You get what Seungkwan is doing and you know if you were Sengkwan you would be able to channel all of that energy and anger towards winning, but you’re not Seungkwan. This is where your personalities diverge completely. Right now, all of those thoughts, everything that has happened tonight… You are trying your hardest to just not cry. Do. Not. Cry. 

Long story short. You lost. Bad. You sucked. Bad. And you wanted out. Bad.

As soon as the final shot sinks and the match ends, you get out of that living room and you go hide. 

You need to breathe, you can’t breathe there. You’re suffocating.

You don’t know how long you stay in the guest bathroom. You’re on the floor, tears running down your face and your breathing has finally started to stabilize. ‘You’re fine. You’re okay. You’ll be fine’ you kept telling yourself over and over.

You get up, clean your face, take one last look in the mirror and try to make yourself look presentable. You needed to leave this party. This was too much, too soon. The boys would have to understand.

You leave the bathroom and as you’re about to leave the guest bedroom, he spoke up behind the bathroom door.

“Not even a hello, love?”

Your heart started beating so loudly, you started shaking. How dare he? How dare he do this to you? You looked back at him over your shoulder and said:

“Don’t make the wrong choices and expect no consequences, Jeonghan. You shouldn’t keep Haneul waiting.”

And you left.

You left. This time, you had the power. You closed the door behind you and you started getting ready to leave. Some of the boys ran over to you.

“I had fun, I did. But I have to go, okay? I’m sorry Soonyoung. And congrats to you boys, you deserve this. You worked too hard so kill it, okay?” you said with a weak smile on your face looking between Hoshi, Jun, Minghao and baby Dino.

They all gave you a huge group hug and let you leave.

You got home and you cried yourself to sleep, again.

You promised yourself you wouldn’t cry for him anymore, no matter what. But here you are. In bed, crying.

You wonder if you even understand Jeonghan at all. If you ever did. He left, didn’t try to contact you but tried to speak to you when you first walked in the party. Brought a new girl to the party he knew you would finally be at and pretended to sulk when you didn't answer his greeting.

You have no idea what he wants. You never did. But it doesn’t matter. Not anymore. 

In a way, now you can heal. You saw him with someone else, the worst possible scenario in your head and you survived. Barely. But you did. You’ll learn to navigate these feelings and you’ll get better at forgetting him.

Tonight was difficult but tomorrow will be better.

It had been two weeks since the party. You had been busy and hadn’t had time to think much more about it. And, you also didn’t want to think about it or talk about it at all.

So, you may have been ignoring the texts the boys sent and even Lily. You just didn’t have the energy at this point. You were still drained and trying to find your bearings.

You knew this wouldn’t last much longer. They were very persistent when they had to be and when they wanted to be. 

Today you decided to have lunch delivered and eat in your office. It was one of the days you needed to be in the office and you were already drained. You didn’t expect any visitors, especially at lunch time but there’s a knock at your door.

“Who is it?” you asked from your desk, pausing your Youtube video.

Lily doesn’t even reply and just opens your office door and comes right in.

“Well, hello there. Why did you knock if you’re just gonna make yourself at home either way?” you asked her playfully.

“I’m mad at you. This is the silent treatment, in case you’ve forgotten what that feels like” she said as she crossed her arms.

“Not much of a silent treatment if you stalk me all the way here AND speak to me or is it?” you asked again.

“You’re unbelievable you know that, Y/N? We barely speak or see you for 6 months, you show up to one party, leave abruptly in the middle of it and start to ignore us again and you still think this is a joke? Keep pushing us away like this and one day none of us are going to push back anymore” she said and your smile fell from your face.

“I’m sorry, Lil. Jeonghan caught me alone at the party and… I had to leave after that. I couldn’t be there anymore. I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I wasn’t ready to see him yet and definitely not ready to see him with someone else so quickly after our falling out” you said honestly.

Lily sighed and smiled sadly at you. 

“Let’s talk about it? You haven’t talked to anyone about it since the falling out. I really think it’s time you share your burden with someone. You can’t keep carrying this alone. It’s going to keep suffocating you. Let it out with me, yeah? Tomorrow? I can come over, we can spend the day together, talking and binge eating and drinking. Like the old days. Let me be your friend, Y/N”

“Deal” was all you said but it was enough to make Lily smile more brightly. 

She hugged you and said her goodbyes and your day continued.

Maybe she was right. You had not talked about it with anyone. Maybe you’ve healed as much as you can on your own. You need support. You need your friends.

The next day you woke up and you were excited. You hadn’t spent a full day with Lily like this in a very long time. You missed this so much. 

You went out for a quick grocery run to get all her favorite snacks and drinks and some other additions you needed for your home and you decided since you weren’t going to bring too much back that you would walk to the store. You could use the fresh air.

As you were walking there, you kept thinking about what Seungkwan had said before. He knew you had blocked Jeonghan but how? You hadn’t told anyone and sure, it could be an obvious assumption, but he knew. With certainty. 

You couldn’t stop thinking about the possibility of Jeonghan having tried to contact you after that night and finding out he was blocked. How did that make him feel? Why did he tell Seungkwan? And did he try to contact you more times after that? How many more times?

‘Why do I care? Why am I torturing myself?’ you asked yourself. But you know why. Deep down (maybe not that deep down) you wanted him to try to contact you. You wanted him to feel like shit when he realized you blocked him, and you wanted him to keep trying to contact you.

You just wanted him.

How pathetic is that? He keeps hurting you and you keep wanting him. Always.

After you got home and prepared everything for Lily’s visit, you sat on your kitchen counter staring at your phone next to you.

‘Don’t do it. Don’t do it. I shouldn’t do it. This is a fucking bad idea. Stop being weak. Don’t do it’ you kept telling yourself over and over again. As you were about to do something very stupid, your doorbell rings and you thank all the heavens and Gods above.

You opened the door and a very excited and happy Lily barged in.

“Did you miss me? How long has it been since we did this? Feels like forever…” she said as she started taking out her blankets and pillows and setting up your living room for a proper girls day.

“I want to unblock Jeonghan. Is that stupid?” you asked abruptly and so quickly that Lily thought she misheard you.

Lily slowly turned around and looked at you with an eyebrow raised.

“Why?” she asked.

“I just… Seungkwan mentioned before that he knew I had blocked Jeonghan and I thought that was weird because I didn’t tell anyone anything and it got me thinking that yeah, I know, he could’ve made that comment based on an assumption but you know Seungkwan, he doesn’t say or do things he is not certain of and that made me wonder if Jeonghan had tried to contact me after that night and if he did, what did he want to say and how did he feel after being blocked by me” you said all in one breath and so fast that Lily almost laughed at you.

“Easy there, we have all day, no need to say things in one breath like that. Don’t want you passing out on me” she said, now laughing out loud.

“Sorry… So… Is it stupid?” you asked her again.

“Of course not. What you two shared… I know we never talked about it but I actually saw myself and Seungcheol a lot in you two but you know, in a completely dysfunctional and delusional way of pretending you didn’t love each other” she said as she laughed lowly and you sat down on your couch.

“Look… I don’t know what he wanted to say but I can confirm he has tried to contact you after that night. Several times actually. Seungcheol told me. I’m assuming he told Seungcheol, Seungkwan and probably Vernon and Shua. He knows they would be his best bet at convincing you to unblock him but none of them wanted to help, I guess. At least Seungcheol didn’t.” she said and you looked down.

“I know he fucked up. But… and don’t hate me for saying this… You did too. And I think you know that. Sure, he fucked up in a much more serious and permanent way but you two just kept hurting each other for years. It’s always been so complicated when it should’ve been easy.” she continued.

“I also know the Y/N I know is a very forgiving person and has always given people second chances. Not saying you should forgive him just like that. But maybe you can hear him out. He clearly wants to talk to you about it and you clearly miss him and want to know what he has to say. Just because you give him a chance to explain, does not mean you will forgive him and want him back in your life.” 

She finished her speech and you looked at her with tears in your eyes.

“How long have you been holding that in?” you asked and laughed.

“6 whole months actually. Seungcheol kept stopping me from saying anything and he kept saying you were too angry. Not ready to hear it just yet” she said and was crying with you now. 

You both looked insane. Crying and laughing at the same time, holding each others’ hands but this was exactly what you needed.

“I hate it when he’s right” you said and laughed.

“Oh, same. And he is always right. The boys were all on your side, you know? Always giving Jeonghan shit.” she added.

“I bet… Seungcheol told me that at the party too” you told her.

“So… Unblock him. Don’t tell anyone. I won’t either. And we’ll see if he tries to contact you again or not” she told you and moved to turn on the TV.

“To be fair, it’s been 6 months. Not sure he would keep trying for that long” you told her as you started to open some of the snacks and drinks.

“Don’t say that. I know for a fact he kept trying and hoping you had unblocked him so he’ll definitely try again” she said as she started helping you with the snacks.

You nodded and… Unblocked him. You did it. It felt weird. You wanted him to reach out but you were also scared of what he would say if he did. And, if you were being honest, you were still so angry at him for leaving you. So you’ll know that if you decide to hear him out, that first conversation is not going to be pretty no matter what he has to tell you.

The rest of the day went by fast. You talked and vented to Lily about everything. Just like you did with Jeonghan on that day. You had told her everything, you had cried together and laughed and after all of it, you just watched a few episodes of a show and before you knew it she had to leave.

You said your goodbyes and promised each other you would do this way more often.

You felt happy when she left. Lighter. You cleaned most things up and decided to go to bed early. You were feeling tired. You were feeling as if today you were finally going to get some real sleep. Lily was right. You needed this. You needed to vent and share your burden and now that you had, you felt relieved.

You wanted to take full advantage of this opportunity. You turned all your notifications off, did your nighttime beauty routine and went to sleep. You fell asleep so fast and you slept like a baby. At last.

Sunday morning you woke up so well rested and a bit confused from sleeping so much. You honestly don’t remember the last time you woke up after 11AM and it felt great. You stretched, yawned, opened your blinds and smiled. 

Wow, you really did feel so much better after being and talking with Lily. It helped with some of the pain and she was right. You didn’t know if you would give Jeonghan a chance to explain himself yet but if you did, that did not mean that you were going to forgive him and that your lives would again intertwine. 

After showering and cooking breakfast, you went to your dinner table facing your window to eat and you remembered you had turned off your notifications for the night so you went back to your room to pick up your phone and turn them back on.

You started eating and checking your notifications when you receive a notification you didn’t think you’d receive this soon.

It was a text from Jeonghan. Apparently sent late last night.

“I know I haven’t texted you since before the party. I didn’t know what to say. I’m sorry isn’t enough. I wanted to give you time but these weeks have been shitty. I’m miserable. I wish you could read my messages and see how much I’ve been suffering without you. I keep texting you pretending that you read them. How pathetic am I? Doesn’t matter. I’ll keep being pathetic until the day you give me a chance to explain everything. I miss you terribly, love”

You kept reading it over and over again. You didn’t know what to do. This is not something you can do over text. This also is starting to seem like a very bad idea at this moment. You know he probably saw the message was delivered, unlike his previous ones. 

Jeonghan is very much feeling like you. Confused. Not quite sure what to do. Send another text? No. Not over text. Call you? Maybe it’s too soon, maybe he should wait to see if you reply at all and then try to call you. A voice message? Hmm, not ideal but it would give him a better platform to at least try to convince you to meet with him and let him explain everything. 

A voice message it is. But it can’t be any voice message, he decided. He needed to write down everything he needed to say in this message. He needed to be clear and straight to the point. Just like you always have been.

After hours of writing points down and recording himself and hearing it back, he decided to just go for it. No matter what, it won’t be perfect. But it’s all he’s got. He has this chance and he can’t afford to waste it. He can’t afford you blocking him again and not being able to get his second chance.

You spent hours trying to avoid staring at your phone. You cleaned your whole apartment and decided to play some games to distract yourself. ‘You don’t have to respond. If he means it, he’ll reach out again. Be patient, Y/N’ you told yourself.

And sure enough, your phone dings a text notification. You’re so nervous. It’s just a text and you’re so nervous. You look down at your phone. It’s a voice message. No. You can’t hear his voice. Why does he know you so well? 

You wanted to wait to open it. You really did. But you couldn’t. You reached down and listened to it.

“Hi, love… I… I don’t really know how to start. I can’t believe you unblocked me. And, don’t worry. I know this doesn’t mean that you’ll hear me out or forgive me but you know I have to try, right? Maybe you don’t. I know you’ve been feeling like you never mattered to me. Like you were never worthy of me. And it’s all my fault. In all these years, I’ve been so blind and I’ve hurt you so much. I wanted to beg you for a second chance but… This isn’t my second chance. It’s not even my third. I’ve hurt you more times than I can keep count and you have given me multiple chances to redeem myself and I always disappointed you. I kept asking myself, if I were you, would I forgive me? Would I give me another chance? How many chances are too many chances? How many times will you forgive me before I learn? Truth is, if I were you, I would be done. Completely. I’m sending you this on the very slim hope that you are better than me and that you will at least let me explain everything. Even if after you hear it, you won’t forgive me. Please… Let me explain myself. Meet with me, one last time, love.”

He was crying for most of his message. You could hear it and it was tearing you apart.

Part of you wanted to meet with him but the other part of you was still so mad. Could he just beg and cry and get away with everything? You deserve better than all of this, you know that now. You’re not sure what to do. You needed to weigh your options. 

You sent him a simple text: “I don’t know. I’ll think about it. Please, don’t message me anymore. I’ll reach back out when I have an answer.”

He liked your message and added nothing else. Jeonghan knows you well and he knows to respect your boundaries, always.

You spent the next few days thinking it over. You kept remembering Lily’s words. Listening to him does not mean you will forgive him and it might even help you with closing this chapter in your life, if that’s the final choice you’ll make.

But somehow, every time you tried to message him and tell them that yes, you will hear him out, you couldn't pull that trigger. You were scared. You couldn’t pinpoint what was holding you back.

You decided to call Lily. She would help you, she would know what to say to help you through this.

She picked up after a few rings.

“Hey! How have you been? How’s the… situation we talked about Saturday?” she asked and you could hear some background noise and echo.

“Am I on speakerphone, Lil?” you asked back.

“Yes, I’m cooking dinner and Seungcheol answered it for me. Is this not a speakerphone conversation?” she asked you and you replied right away.

“Actually, if Cheolie is there and wants to give his input, I would appreciate it. I’m… confused? I don’t even know the right word to describe what I’m feeling right now…” you replied and you immediately got an answer from the other side of the phone.

“I’m here. Tell us” he said, straight to the point. You too had always had that in common. Cut through the bullshit and get to the point.

“Well, Saturday after me and Lily spoke, I decided to unblock Jeonghan. I just… Wanted to know if he tried to reach out and if he would again and he did. That same night actually. Long story short he sent me a text and a voice message begging me to meet up with him and let him at least explain. He said a lot of things… I don’t know how to feel about them? I told him I would think about it and I thought about it. A lot. I want to hear him out but every time I go to message him the fear and hurt resurfaces again and I just… Can’t… I mean… Does this mean I shouldn’t listen to him? I need help…” you said and waited for a response.

“You should hear him out” Seungcheol said simply.

You didn’t know what to say so he continued.

“What’s the worst that can happen? You fight? Good. You need to fight. You both need to tell each other everything you’ve been holding inside since you met. You need to scream at each other and understand how annoyingly frustrating you both are. And if after that fight you decide it’s not worth it, you’ve given him too many chances, then you’ll know and you’ll be able to finally get closure and truly move on. Let’s face it, Y/N. You won’t fully move on until you get your answers. All of them.”

“I really do hate it when you’re right…” you said and the three of you chucked.

“But I’m always right, Y/N. Meet up with him and come running here if you need to” he told you.

After you hung up with them, you decided you needed to rest. You had a migraine. Tomorrow will be a new day and tomorrow you’ll let him know.

The next morning you decided to call Jeonghan before starting work. You knew his schedule and you knew he would be up. You couldn’t do this through text and you won’t.

He picked up immediately.

“Hello, love. Good morning. Did you sleep well?” he sounded the same. Asked the same questions he used to before. It felt familiar and nice.

“Hi, Jeonghan. Good morning. Yes, I did, thank you. I hope you did too. Look, I’ve decided to hear you out. I don’t want to talk through the phone or in a public place. I have a feeling this conversation will be… difficult to say the least for the both of us. Can I come over after work this week or is the weekend better for you?” you asked him.

“Tonight. Come over tonight, please.” he said without any hesitation.

“Okay… Tonight it is. I’m working from home so I should be done at 6PM. I’ll be there by 7” you stated plainly.

“Okay, love. I’ll be waiting” he said and he sounded as if he were smiling. It made you want to smile as well but you didn’t.

“See you then, Jeonghan” you said and hung up.

You weren’t ready to see and speak to him but were you ever going to be?

Tonight, everything will be out in the open. Finally. You will both put all our cards on the table. No more secrets. No more hiding. And then, you can both decide how to move forward. Together or separate.

6PM comes quicker than you anticipated and it’s time to get ready and meet with him.

You got to his apartment and the nerves started kicking in. ‘You got this’ you told yourself right before you rang the doorbell. 

He must have been right by the door because the door flew open almost right after you rang the doorbell.

“Hi, love. Come in, please” he said and gave you room to walk towards the living room. He sounded nervous. He looked nervous too. It made you feel good to know you weren’t alone in this. 

You walked in the living room. It was clear he prepared for your arrival. The room smelled like the candle you loved and kept buying for him so he would always have it when you came over. The lights were dimmed and he had put music on in the background. He had water and snacks on the coffee table and your pictures together were still up and visible to anyone who walked in his house.

Fuck, you missed him so much. You want to stay strong but you are already feeling so weak.

You sat on the couch, turned your phone off and looked up at him with raised eyebrows, silently asking him ‘What are you waiting for?’.

He sat on the couch with you, turned his phone off and started speaking.

“I love you. And no, I don’t mean in a ‘best friends’ type of way. I’m in love with you. And yes, I am fully aware those are the exact same words you said to me 6 months ago. And you should know I’ve wanted to say these words back to you ever since that night. I’ve always loved you. Since the very beginning. I have been trying to figure out why I didn’t see it or why I kept telling myself that I didn’t love you like that but honestly, I don’t know why I did it. I know I’ve always been afraid to lose you. To have you look at me with disappointment in your eyes. But before that night, I told myself we were just friends and were always going to be just friends. I had convinced myself of that fact and I don’t understand why.” he said with tears in his eyes now. 

“Fuck, I know what a cliché it is to only realize what I have in front of me once I lose it, trust me. But the night I left, I remember thinking how happy I had always been with you, around you, in your presence. How lost I was before you walked into my life and it all made so much fucking sense. You and I made sense.” he continued. 

You were staring in his eyes and it was your turn now to turn your poker face on.

“Only after I met you did I set up all these rules about my dating life. No one was ever worthy of dating me simply because they weren’t you. I kept making these excuses… To myself, to everyone around me. But I was just too stupid to see that I was making these rules in hopes of finding someone like you. Because I’ve always known since I met you, Y/N, that I’m the one that is and never was worthy of being with you. But if there’s anything I have learned in all the years we’ve known each other is that there’s absolutely no one like you, not for me” he continued.

“I wanted you for so long that when I saw the chance of having you, I took it. No hesitation. I don’t regret that first night and never will. What I will regret is never having kissed you that night and the conversation that took place after it all happened. What I said, the way I acted. Like you were just another ‘fuck-buddy’. I will never forgive myself for that and I don’t expect you to either” he said as tears kept flowing down his face. 

He never wavered and kept looking at you while he finished up his speech.

“I know I don’t deserve another chance. I don’t deserve forgiveness. But I still had to ask. I had to try. I love you and I am begging you to give me another chance. At everything. Being your best-friend, your lover, your partner. I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you, if you’ll let me” and he was done. 

The only sounds in the room were the sounds of you both crying. Why did he only decide to tell you all of this now? Why was life so unfair? You don’t know if this is enough. His words are beautiful but they always have been. You needed more. Much more. 

And your anger starts winning over your forgiving side. You still have a lot to tell him before you even make a decision about this. He needs to hear how much he has hurt you. 

“Am I just supposed to be moved by this and forget all these years? Forget all the words you’ve said to me, all the little comments and jokes you made about me not being your type and not even being close to what you wanted?” you asked him.

“You know me well, Yoon Jeonghan, which means you know my memory never fails me. I remember every single cruel thing you said and smirked about. I remember the restaurant you never took me to no matter how many times I begged you to because ‘That is way too romantic for us, love’. And you want me to believe that after you’ve said all of these things you went home and felt bad about it?” you were getting angrier and angrier.

“You don’t love me. And you didn’t love me back then either. You love the way I make you feel. You love how desperate and pathetic I am and always have been for you. You love that I worship the ground you walk on. You love the feeling of having someone willing to do anything for you, willing to sacrifice their own beliefs and self-esteem to get even a small portion of your attention. You love having someone beg you to take them out, begging you to see them. You love all of these things and anytime someone gave that to you, you stayed” you were getting harsher now. 

“That’s how you found your ‘fuck-buddies’. You always chose the most desperate ones because you always loved the way it made you feel about yourself. That’s why you kept me around. You kept all of us around for different feelings. We were all desperate for you, yes. But their job was to keep you satisfied sexually, while mine was purely emotional. It wasn’t love. Not for them and not for me.”

You said and started getting up from the couch and collecting your things.

“I was never different from them. Not in the core of the matter. In the end, we all got hurt and you always left, unburdened and ready for your next fling to satisfy your ego” you said as you began to walk towards the apartment door.

You looked over your shoulder and told him: “I don’t know if I can forgive you. I know I don’t believe you. I wish I did. I really do. But my memories of every little thing you did over the years that hurt me are keeping me from letting go. I’m glad we both got to say what we always needed to say to each other. I’m not sure we’ll see each other again, but if we don’t, we can at least have closure now. Goodbye, Jeonghan.”

You got home that night and you were just… Numb. You couldn’t cry anymore. You didn’t want to scream. You just sat on your couch, staring at your wall, not knowing what to do and how to move on from this. From him. 

You fell asleep on your couch that night and woke up the next day feeling even worse.

You reached out to both Lily and Seungcheol and they were very supportive but they also made sure you knew they weren’t going to advise you any further. The next decision was entirely up to you. 

The next week went by so slowly. You still felt like shit and it seemed to only get worse each day.

It may sound stupid but you missed him. You had just seen him. You had a bad fight. Yet, you missed him. 

You went to your closet and took out the box of pictures you had hidden there. You started looking over each one of them. All of them were attached to such great memories. Memories of days together, nights together, vacations together. You were always smiling brightly. You remember all those feelings. Everything he had made you feel when you were together. 

You started to regret some of the things you said last time you saw him. He cared for you deeply. You could tell from the pictures and from all the good memories you had. He always protected you and made sure you felt safe and warm. Your friendship was nothing like the flings he had. You went too far. You wanted to hurt him but you weren’t fair in your accusations.

You’re pretty sure that’s why you feel like shit. You thought saying these things to him and hurting him would make you feel better. It would leave you satisfied knowing he was hurting like you did all those times. But it didn’t. It made you feel so much worse than before. 

You fucked up and now it was your turn to fix it. You knew if you went back there, it would mean you would forgive him. Were you ready for that? Was that what you wanted?

You dropped the pictures, grabbed your keys and left. 

You were standing in front of his door wondering if you should ring the doorbell. He might be busy. He might not even be home. You didn’t even know what you were going to say. Fuck, this was a terrible idea. You need to leave. Now. Go home. Regroup and come back with a plan.

The door opened and a tired Jeonghan was staring at you, blinking in confusion with his jacket halfway on his body.

“Hmm… Hi… I wanted to talk to you. I should’ve called or texted before. Sorry. I should leave. Sorry” you were shaking and started to leave but he grabbed your elbow and stopped you from moving.

“No. Stay. I’m not busy. Talk to me. Please” he asked you.

“You were leaving though… I feel bad… I--”

“I was out of whiskey. Was going to buy more. It doesn’t matter. Stay. Come in. Talk. Please, love” he interrupted you and he never let go of your arm. 

“O..Okay. Yeah. Okay” you nodded and went inside his apartment.

He took off both his jacket and shoes and you did the same. You looked around. The house was messy. Very unusual. Jeonghan was a creature of habits and he hated messiness. This was your fault.

You decided to be blunt again. 

“Did you mean it? What you said last week? All of it?” you asked him nervously.

“Yes. Every word. I know it’s hard to believe but I meant every fucking word” he responded just as bluntly.

“What about Haneul? You brought her around the boys… To the party…” 

You hated that you asked but you had to know everything before giving him a permanent answer.

“She invited herself. Pretty much blindsided me into joining us. She’s been following me around the company. I’ve made myself very clear. I’m not available and it will never happen but she wasn’t backing down. I’ve been really tired. Exhausted, after losing you. I had no strength left in me to fight her. I would just ignore her until she gets the message. Not my finest moment but I couldn’t care less” he said plainly.

You nodded and started getting really nervous. You gulped and asked him your final question.

“I was an asshole last week. I’m sorry. I said a lot of things that weren’t fair. I wanted to hurt you. I regret most of it. After all I said, do you still want me? Want us? Want to spend the rest of your life making it up to me?”

“That’s all I want. I want all of it. I deserved your words. I deserved to be hurt. I should be the one apologizing. But fuck yeah. If you give me that chance, this last chance, I will never let you go again” he said as he walked closer to you until he was so close you could feel his breath on your lips.

You looked up at him.

“Deal. I want to forgive you. I want to move forward with you. With us. But I have a few rules…”

He looked in your eyes and started to smirk. You were giving him a taste of his own medicine. He knew this wasn’t going to be easy but he would do everything to earn you back.

You moved away from him and started to put your shoes and jacket on, getting ready to leave.

“No sex. Not in the beginning. I want romance. Lots of dates. We have similar tastes and you know me better than anyone. Choose wisely” he laughed and nodded along.

“Kissing is very much allowed and encouraged. This is obviously an exclusive relationship and I am to be called and to be treated as your girlfriend, always” he kept smiling and was starting to tear up. He couldn’t believe how lucky he was.

“Anything else, princess?” he asked.

“No princess. I like baby much better. Or angel. Other than that, no other rules. For now” you answered him. And before you left, you walked towards him, intertwined your hands and asked him sincerely:

“I missed you, Hannie. Don’t make me regret this, okay?”

“Never, baby. You’re mine now. I missed you so much, too. Let me take you out tomorrow, yeah? First date?” he asked back.

“I can’t tomorrow. Friday I’m free. Pick me up after work?”

“I’ll be there, baby” he said and you turned to leave.

Right before you left he told you “I’ll be texting you. Don’t ignore your boyfriend, baby. He’s very needy”

You laughed as you nodded and left his apartment.

You got home that night and you couldn’t sleep. You were so happy. Is this even real? This wasn’t a dream, right? And as you were having these thoughts, Jeonghan texted you just as he promised right before you left his apartment.

Next thing you knew, a month flew by. Your first month together as a couple.

So far he’s kept all his promises. He was the one worshiping you now. He always texted or called to make sure you were safe and happy. He took you out on multiple dates a week and always made you feel like you were the only two people in the whole world.

On your first date he took you to the restaurant down the street from his place that you always wanted to go. You had a feeling he was going to pick that place and you made fun of him for it but he kept saying ‘I told you, baby. From now on, I will do everything to earn your forgiveness and love. Clichés and all’.

After your first date, he took you home and kissed you so gently by the door. 

You never thought you would feel this way. You felt complete. The happiest you had ever been.

During this month together, he never made any additional moves on you. 

You had kissed. A lot. 

Made out like teenagers. A lot.

But he always stopped it and ended your date there.

You knew you asked for this in the beginning as one of your rules but you couldn’t take it anymore. 

You needed him. You knew you had to be the one to make the move or show that you are ready. Otherwise, he will keep respecting your boundaries no matter how hard you want him to disrespect them.

Today you met up with Lily for lunch. The guys and Lily had barely seen the two of you. You only had time and eyes for each other and everyone was letting you two enjoy this new relationship without any interruptions.

“You are glowing, you know that, Y/N?” she asked as she ate.

You laughed and told her “I’m just so fucking happy. I never thought this would happen. He’s been so amazing. And it doesn’t feel different. I mean, our friendship. We’re still infuriating with each other but now we just have the added benefit of kissing to shut each other up.”

“And fucking” she said loudly and you hushed her while you two giggled.

“We’re in public, asshole. And about the fucking…” you said.

“Nothing yet? I gotta give it to him. Never thought he would be able to last this long without making a move. Good for him” she said and kept giggling.

“Good for him? I am dying here, woman. I’ve tried everything. All my moves, all the signs and he just won’t do anything” you whispered.

“It’s your fault. You made it a ‘rule’. You should know that not only would he take this seriously, but he would also use this to torture you for as long as he could. Possibly until you begged him to fuck you” she said again way too loudly in this very public restaurant.

You looked around after shushing her and you realized what she just said. Oh my god. He’s doing this on purpose. Of course. You should’ve known better. You gave him a challenge and he was punishing you for it, the little shit.

“I love that you are only realizing this now” she said and kept laughing.

“Shut up and finish your food” you bit back at her.

You had a date tonight with Jeonghan. You had offered to cook for the both of you. More of an intimate date. And you were going in for the kill tonight. You were done waiting but you were also going to have some fun with him.

You had this pink dress in your closet that you bought almost a year ago. You were saving it for a really good date or so you kept telling everyone. And we’re here now. 

Pink is not your usual pick but this dress is a killer. And an added bonus: Jeonghan loves seeing you in pink. This dress is just short enough. Obscene cleavage. A bit corseted. Enough to let your natural curves speak for themselves.

Underneath the dress, the smallest thong was covering your pussy and of course, no bra.

You had covered your body in the watermelon body lotion he loved smelling on you. Very little makeup and hair down. Just how he liked it on you.

Everything was ready and waiting for him. Food was ready and in the oven. You had set the mood with the candles, lighting and music in the living room and dining room and your bedroom was certainly refreshed and ready to greet him.

When you opened the door and he had the chance to see you. You knew you made all the right choices tonight. He stared you up and down and gulped.

“Like what you see, Hannie?” you asked and walked away from him towards your kitchen.

He came up behind you before you could reach the kitchen counter, turned you around and kissed you. Deeply. Full of passion. Until you were both out of breath. He started touching the bottom part of your dress with his fingertips very lightly.

“‘You look absolutely gorgeous tonight, baby. Why haven’t I seen this dress before?” he asked.

“Well… You weren’t exactly the best boy to me for a while. But now… Now you deserve to see it. All for yourself, too” you said, still panting and recovering from the kiss.

And in a very Jeonghan fashion, he completely surprises you with his next question.

“Has anyone else seen you in this dress, baby? On a date? Who have you worn this for before me, hmm?”

You smiled and whispered in his ear: “No one else but you.”

He almost growled at you and started leaning in again to kiss you. He had that look in his eyes you knew all too well and you moved away from him.

“We should eat. Food is getting cold, Hannie” you said and moved towards the oven.

He stared and narrowed his eyes at you but he knew what you were playing at. He knew you too well. Let’s see who has the most self-control tonight, then.

You had a great meal. He complimented your cooking as usual and kept holding your hand every time he saw the opportunity to. 

Everything was perfect. 

You two started cleaning up after eating and you kept talking about everything that was going on in your lives.

Everything was always so easy between the two of you. 

You both sat on the couch and decided to watch a movie together. He was very touchy during the whole movie. His hand was moving higher and higher up your thigh and every time he moved it higher, he sighed, almost moaned. 

You were so fucking wet and he had barely done anything. Tonight had to be the night, right? ‘He wasn��t that evil’ you thought.

When the movie ended and his hand was almost completely underneath your dress, he moved closer to you, leaned in, held your chin in his hands and started to whisper against your lips.

“I should go, it’s getting late”

He laughed after watching the disappointment in your eyes, got up and started getting ready to leave.

You also got up and grabbed his jacket to stop him.

“You can’t leave yet” you said shakily.

He hummed.

“Why’s that, baby? Something you want from me?” he asked as he walked back over to you.

Okay, you can say it. It’s fine. Just ask him. Tell him, do anything.

“Ugh… Nevermind. Just… Drive safe, I guess” and you tried handing his jacket back to him.

He licked his lips, ripped the jacket from your hands, threw it on the couch and started walking you backwards towards the living room wall.

Once you were backed up against the wall, he placed both hands on each side of your head.

“Is it so hard to ask to get fucked, hmm? Not like you haven’t done it before. What’s with the pride, baby?” he asked.

You stared at him with uneven breaths but stayed silent.

“You know me, baby. Either ask me what I want to hear or I’ll leave you here against this wall in your probably very small and very wet panties” he said and started kissing down your neck.

“Stay. Fuck me” you said hurrily and barely in a whisper.

“You have to do better than that, baby. Ask me nicely since you’ve been a tease all fucking night” he said and now one of his hands was on your thigh, rubbing circles.

“Please, fuck me, Hannie. Please. I can’t wait anymore. You’re driving me crazy” you begged and he must have liked it because you felt him chuckle against your skin.

He pulled your dress up and slapped your clothed pussy. You moaned.

“Now that wasn’t so hard was it? You’ve wanted me to fuck you for a while now. Was wondering when you were going to start acting like a greedy little slut. My greedy little slut” he told you while he cupped your pussy.

“Hannie…” you moaned.

He moved away from you and started walking to your bedroom. You followed him. He sat on your bed and started unbuttoning his shirt while licking his lips and staring at you.

You stood in front of him.

“Take it all off, baby and come sit on my face” he told you.

You were nervous. You hadn’t done this before. Not with him. But you were also excited.

You took it all off, just as he asked and you started moving closer. He layed back on the bed and beckoned you to join him.

You did. You laid on top of him completely naked and you started kissing each other. His hands were everywhere. You couldn’t get enough of him. 

He stopped kissing you and started moving up on the bed to straddle his head and he dove right in. No hesitation. No words. No more waiting. He was eating you out like a starved man. You were holding on to the top of your bed and his hair.

He was being sloppy and loud and moving up and down between your clit and your hole. He spanked you hard and moved one of his hands to your folds. He started fingering you using two fingers while sucking hard on your clit. 

You were so fucking close already. This was fucking embarrasing. You start shaking and moving away from his mouth and he spanks you again.

“Don’t fucking move away from me again. Don’t you dare. Don’t be embarrassed and cum. Let go. Cum” he told you then while pushing your hips back down on his mouth.

And as soon as he pushed you back down and continued his movements, you started falling apart and moaning his name so fucking loud. 

He didn’t stop then. He kept going.

“Hmm… Sensitive… Can’t… Hannie…” you whined.

“Shhh baby, you can give me more. I know you can. Fucking give it to me. I’m fucking greedy” he started fingering you again, slower this time and started marking your thighs with his mouth until he saw purple marks all over your inner thighs. 

You kept moaning and whining and you were getting louder and impatient. He laughed and moved back on your clit.

This time he added a third finger and kept sucking on your clit. It was a mess, you were sure of it. His face, his fingers. You had never felt this wet and this sloppy before and you were getting closer and closer.

With his free hand, he cupped your breast and twisted your nippled between his fingers and you came again with a cry of his name.

You started slumping on the bed while you were still panting and he moved you off of him and laid you on your back.

He started kissing down your neck and taking his clothes off.

When he was fully naked and on top of you, you grabbed his face with both of your hands and you looked in his eyes. You wanted to know what he was thinking. How he was feeling.

“I love you, baby. So fucking much. Let me have you now, yeah?” he asked as he looked into your eyes. Almost as if he knew that you needed that, you needed to hear him say it.

You kissed him again and tangled your hand in his hair.

You both gasped when he started pushing into you and you both moaned when he bottomed out completely.

“Fuck, I missed you so fucking much. This pussy was made for me. I might not last long, baby. It’s been too long since I had you” he whispered in your ear.

“Hmmm, what about since your other ‘fuck-buddies’? How long ago was that?” you asked and he stared in your eyes and got very serious. You hated that you asked it but you need to know the answer.

“I haven’t been with anyone else after you. I thought that was obvious, baby. I want you. I spent all these months wanting you. No one else” he said and started kissing you again.

You stopped kissing him and asked him to start moving and he did.

He held your hips in place with one hand and with the other he intertwined your fingers together and he started pounding into you. No mercy. He was desperate for you and you for him.

“Fuck, Hannie… So good… Feels so fucking good… Don’t stop, please…”

He grunted in response and kept pounding into you.

You were getting closer again and he felt it so he moved the hand that was holding yours to push down on your stomach and kept pounding you hard into the mattress.

“You’re so close aren’t you, baby? I can fucking feel it. You’re squeezing me so hard, baby. Fuck… Let go. Let me feel you”

He leaned his forehead against yours and you came again. This is the loudest you have probably been. You feel shy all of a sudden but you can’t say anything coherent. You’re mostly babbling at this point and he starts laughing at you.

“Don’t tell me I fucked you stupid, baby. Use your words properly, you’re a big girl”

“Hannie… s’good…”

He kept laughing and kissing you and he leaned back to move one of your legs and place it on his shoulder.

He was now squeezing your thigh of the leg on his shoulder with one hand and grabbing your tits with his other hand and he started slowly thrusting into you. So you could feel every vein and every ridge on his cock moving inside of you. This felt like torture but you knew he was delaying his orgasm as much as he could.

“Look at you… My angel… You’re so gorgeous like this under me… Fuck, I’m never letting you go. My good girl… Hmm? Are you my good girl, baby? Answer me”

You started nodding.

“Yes… Yeah… Yours.. Good… Good girl…”

It was your turn now to surprise him. You grabbed his hand that was on your tits and moved it to your neck.

“Fuck, baby… Want me to choke you? Can’t have anything nice, can we? Calling you my good girl and you start acting like a greedy little slut again”

He chuckled and started thrusting into you with much more force and speed. The hand on your neck started squeezing lightly and you started whining and feeling closer and closer to the edge again.

“Gonna cum one last time, hmm? With my hand around your throat like a slut? Yeah… Fuck yeah… Cum with me then, angel”

He leaned down to kiss you and you started cumming again. This time your vision turned white. You thought you were dreaming. This felt surreal.

You kept repeating his name over and over again and when you said ‘I love you’, he finally came inside you with a grunt and a low moan in your ear.

He laid down on top of you as you both recovered and he kept playing with your hair and calling your name.

“Baby… You okay? Was that too much? Come back to me, don’t fall asleep yet, we need to clean up”

You laid with your eyes closed and hummed.

“I’m here, Hannie. Just… Give me a few minutes… I think you broke me” you said and you both started laughing.

“Good broken though?” he asked.

“Fucking amazing broken” you answered and you kept laughing together.

After a few more minutes of laying together in pure bliss, he convinced you to get up and take a shower with him.

He had to hold you up for most of it. You were so tired. He kept poking fun at you and all you could mumble was ‘your fault’ and he started chuckling.

You shared a bed for the first time as a couple that night. You remember feeling like this was supposed to have been happening since the very beginning of your friendship. 

You knew you wanted to have him with you here for the rest of your life and all you could do was hope he meant every word he said and that he would want the same with you. It was the best sleep of your life that night.

You woke up the next morning to the sounds of Jeonghan singing to the music he was playing and what sounded like cooking. 

Fuck, you were starving. But first, you had to make yourself look presentable. He always looked so good in the morning and you… Well.., you had more of a rough appearance in the morning so you needed a moment to collect yourself before following the sound of his beautiful voice.

You went to the bathroom to do your morning routine and afterwards you joined him in the kitchen.

“Good morning, Hannie. What are you cooking, baby?” you said as you hugged him from behind.

“Hmm… Morning, angel. Just some eggs and sausage. You didn’t have much more”

“Sounds delicious, thank you” you said as you moved to sit on the kitchen counter behind him.

“We have to replace all those photos, baby” he said as he turned around to look at you.

You knew he meant the pictures you had ripped apart and put back together after your falling out.

“I don’t want to. I like them this way. It tells our story. It’s a little broken but in the end it got put back together” you said and smiled at him.

He smiled and turned back to the stove.

“You just want to get our kids on your side and have me as the bad guy, huh?” he asked and you chucked.

“Kids? Getting a bit ahead of ourselves, no? Let’s not make promises we can’t keep. We both have done enough of those” you said and he nodded and laughed.

You felt so happy when he said that but you didn’t want to sound too eager. You knew you wanted to spend the rest of your life with him but you still were scared that he would regret this eventually and leave you again.

What you didn’t know was that this time, he wasn’t going to let you go anywhere, and he was never going anywhere without you.

He was going to spend the rest of his life by your side, earning back every once of trust and love he lost from you before.

He was okay with you still being guarded. He knew you had nothing to worry about and he would prove it to you. Soon enough he will take out the engagement ring he bought after your first date and he will make sure you stay by each others’ side always.

The ultimate pinky promise.

It’s here guys and it’s a monster 😭 I really hope it lives up to your expectations. I’m still nervous about everything I write! Please let me know in the comments and such if you liked it  💕 Thank you for supporting me! CHEERS 🥂

Taglist (if you requested specifically): @woofie-nctzen-fanarts @lannadray @cvixmei @feat-sun @cvpidxo @yunjinified @shuahasmyheartffs @jjjzzz @starlight-night0 @rendeciu @momoxxchewz @miniseokminnies @meowmeowminnie @sofix-hc7 @aaniag @shinetogether17 @goodforgyu @sharkipoonis

#jeonghan smut #yoon jeonghan smut #seventeen smut #jeonghan #jeonghan fic #yoon jeonghan #jeonghan x you #yoon jeonghan x you #jeonghan x reader #yoon jeonghan x reader #svt x reader #seventeen imagines #seventeen fic #seventeen x reader #yoon jeonghan fic #vee's writings

[bagerfluff]

Bloody Promises

Set in season two - Scott McCall x Male Reader

Prompt - "you're bleeding"

Y/n L/n was the local ‘bad boy’ of Beacon Hills High School. He wore ripped jeans, white shirts and tank tops, black leather jackets, and black sneakers. He got into fights like it was his job. He didn’t do the best in school. He rarely showed up to class. And almost everyone was scared of him. Except for his boyfriend. Scott McCall. When everyone heard they were dating they were shocked. The bad boy Y/n dating the nice shy Scott. Even Stiles was shocked when he heard it. He thought Y/n would treat Scott like trash and so did everyone else. But they were wrong. Y/n treated Scott like a prince. Anything Scott wished came true if Y/n heard it. 

What people also found out is that you don’t mess with Scott. Someone had bullied Scott and Y/n saw them do it. They were beat up in less than a few minutes. Y/n was very protective of Scott. You could get beat up if you looked at him wrong. But Scott didn’t like it when Y/n beat people up. Scott was one of the only people that could Y/n what to do and not get beat to a pulp. But that didn’t mean that Y/n didn’t beat people up, he just did it less and when Scott wasn’t around. Like right now. Y/n was walking down the hall to his next class when he overheard Jackson talking shit about Scott.

Y/n was pissed as he heard this so he did what he normally did when he was pissed. He punched something. And that something was Jackson’s face. Y/n managed to hit Jackson to the floor. And beat him to a pulp. After Y/n was satisfied with how much he beat up Jackson Y/n got up and walked away. The crowd that had formed to watch the fight moved out of the way to let Y/n though not wanting to make the boy mad. After the fight the day went normally. Scott had even asked if he could stay at Y/n’s house after school Y/n said yes and told Scott to meet him at his car.

So now Y/n was leaning against his car door on his driver side. Rubbing the blood of his knuckles of his hands with a tissue. Y/n didn’t notice Scott walking up. Y/n didn’t notice him standing in front of him till Scott said “You’re bleeding!” Y/n looked up at Scott, not shocked at his loud voice or by the fact he came out of nowhere. “It’s not my blood” Y/n said matter of factly, going back to cleaning his hand. Scott sighed as he thought. He asked Y/n to stop fighting but he never listened. It was making Scott mad. And sad.

Did Y/n not listen to Scott when he asked him to do other things. Did Y/n not like him? Scott loved Y/n so it made him sad thinking that the man he loved didn’t love him. Stiles did tell Scott the problem with dating the schools ‘bad boy’. Scott sighed as he whispered “do you love me?” Y/n heads snapped up as he heard it. Y/n loved Scott, he was the only thing in this life that he loved. So why didn’t Scott know that. “Yes” Y/n said, throwing the tissue into a nearby trash can. “Then why don’t you listen to me!” Scott yelled “I ask you to not beat people up but you do!” 

Y/n was shocked. “I only beat people up because they talk shit about you” Y/n responded. Scott sighed “I don’t need you to protect me” Scott said, crossing his arms over his chest and looking at the ground. Y/n sighed and looked at his hands. Scott was a werewolf. Y/n wasn’t the most romantic person. So he found it hard to show how much he loved Scott. He thought by protecting him from bullies would show that. Guess he was wrong. Y/n looked back up at Scott to see that he was about to cry. Y/n walked forward and pulled Scott into his arms.

“I’m sorry” Y/n said. “I’ll try” Y/n said into Scott’s hair. Scott knew what he was talking about. Scott wrapped his arms around Y/n’s body as Y/n did the same to Scott. “Promise me” Scott whispered as he looked up at Y/n. “I promise” Y/n said, and sealed it with a kiss to Scott’s forehead. “I’m still mad at you” Scott said and Y/n laughed a bit. “That’s fine” Y/n said as he kissed Scott. Scott and Y/n didn’t know if Y/n could keep his promise. But Y/n would try. He would do anything for Scott. 

Anything. 

#lgbtq #trangender #gay #pansexual #bisexual #teen wolf x male reader #teen wolf x reader #teen wolf #male reader #male reader imagines #scott mccall x male reader #scott mccall

[iamhereinthebg]

I LOVE THEM SM THE CLOCK KEEPERS FAM AAAAH

Mirai is so cute here I am ascending

Anyways, I will be honest I have some mixt feeling rn :00

About the clock keepers themselves?? I don't have that much fear tbh, they are supernaturals in their boundary, and contrary to number 3 they don't have hearts that Tsukasa or anyone else can consume. I think they will be fine (or I am being delusionnal to protect myself, you choose rip) I love them very much they will always live in my heart.

I was REALLY not happy with chapter 109, having to be focused on little crumbs was really hard when I have been waiting for their focus for more than 4 years. Having the joke that is chapter 109 absolutely destroyed me, they are my fav mysteries and I want something good for them, unfortunately I am not sure they will get it.

Chapter 110 gave me some hope because yes what is happening is not normal, and I am glad it was adressed. For me it was obvious af it' wasn't, but I really needed confirmation from the author to be sure.

I have always said that the clock keepers were unique and Teru confirms it in this chapter with the official translation:

'The clock keepers are clearly unique even among the school mysteries, and go beyond the average supernaturals'

They are n°1, the only mystery with three beings in it and with a human, one of the last two mysteries left with the other one being the main focus on the manga. Of course something is strange with how they are treated right now. What is happening?

None of them used their time powers expect for Mirai once as the judgment. The stuff they are saying to punish Tsukasa seems more like jokes and they aren't treating the trial as they should be (but this may be just because chapter 109 is bad af lol). Mirai can litteraly see the future if she wants to.

The owls, their shikigami/familiars don't move at all when their masters are attacked, they are in their own boundary, their shrine. Maybe their powers are related to the clock Natsuhiko destroyed (and I would be sad af if this is the reason and nothing can be done) we just don't know what is happening. Do they have a plan? Are they playing a part (which would be funny because some stuff about the clock keepers are related to theaters and plays) Did someone forced them to do something? We don't know anything about the clock keeper, them being in the same spot as n°6 before we got to his story.

We just know they are special among the mysteries, they are the oldest ones, Kako and Mirai are made of gears and a human has a seat in it.

I am pretty sure Teru had this conversation with Akane here because he knows the clock keepers are special.

The two mysteries being the more visible here being the god of death and the clock keepers.

It's also the only mystery Hanako didn't want to destroy right away because they could be useful. All mysteries had their yorishiro destroyed/were planned to be destroyed once they got students in danger. (expect for Tsuchigomori who just, accepted it as a precaution rip) The clock keepers are the only ones who got a free pass on this even after getting the whole school involved.

Their powers are just above a lot of the others, and everyone know how useful it can be, so once again why aren't they using it?

Not caring about their yorishiro is also super strange. Especially when the one the most against Hanako's plan to destroy the yorishiros in the manga is Kako.

A mystery has to choose a yorishiro to be a proxy of the gods, to be able to have this status.

They have to choose a yorishiro so they don't run away from the job, it's the thing the most important to them so they would never destroy it. They have to protect it. Teru assuming they don't care is just so so strange. Why wouldn't they? That's the whole point of what a yorishiro is! They even hide it in one of them as an extra precaution! A lot of things go against what has been established before for yorishiros it's just plain out suspicious.

Kako and Akane are also really really duty centered characters. Akane will do a job even if he doesn't want to if he is asked to do it and Kako is the one being represented as the observator over the mysteries to see if they are respecting their sworn duty.

I also don't know what to think about their yorishiro for now. What does it open? A door to another room? Is it to protect something? Is it to activate another automaton? Can it be related somehow to the old clock keeper of the present? (delulu land again)

Idk I am really curious. I really hope we won't have the answer right away though, they were defeeated way too quickly and I hope they have more stuff to them. We got Hakubo's and Sumire's story and a part of the Yugi twins beforec their yorishiro got destroyed, so I hope it will be the same for them. That we will have time to get to know them a little bit more.

And after all, neither Nene or Hanako want to destroy any more yorishiro for now, and Tsukasa apparently lost it at the end of the chapter (we can see the hand who had it being empty. But AidaIro has sometimes a problem of coherence with their right and left and objects disappearing and appearing which I can understand with the rythm they have to keep with the manga, so I am not sure)

I have a lot of fears about this tbh, because maybe AidaIro will just give us the reason why they are weak rn and continue the story without explaining anything about them, not giving them the spotlight I think they truly deserve. The worst for me would be they work for Sakura, I really really hope it's not this, but I am really scared :///

So I will go for this for now, even if this is really depressing for me, but I don't want to have my hopes up with how the writing have been really ups and downs since the start of this arc (the only good chapter for me being chapter 108).

I am still really intrigued by what is Akane's real duty and why is he so reluctant to do it but still does it? Why Akane said they had to do the trials now? Honestly I have a lot of questions and I know no matter what happens, the clock keepers make me super sad (in a good way) and happy at the same time. And this last chapter with Mirai and Akane was a blast (I am actually writing a whole document on them rn it's long I will link it later ahah)

I also wonder if any of the clock keepers can use the others' clocks or not? Does this mean like Kako can go full OP while using all three powers at the same time? (let's go grandpa give us everything) I am curious since they are a mystery where having an object is important for their powers (Kako and Mirai being able to use their with bare hands because they have their clocks on them, I can be wrong about it though)

We are also left with only Akane as n°1 rn and idk what it will mean for him.

So yes full of fears, but also I know I will find crumbs to go delulu on :DD I would try to stay full positive but with the focus being on Tsukasa and on how secondary characters rn are mostly as 'objects for the plot' (I mean, look at Nene :')) I can't really ://

But be sure, I will forever love the clock keepers even if the plots are not respecting them

#toilet bound hanako kun #I really need to talk about the copy pasted dying Mirai because this is SENDING me #why are you doing this to my girl AidaIro #I am sorry I lost the ask I am an idiot :')) #fortunately I had it like this dsjds #the three clock keepers #are once again rotating in my head non stop #mirai #aoi akane #kako #jshk #jibaku shonen hanako kun spoilers #tbhk #ramblings #idk if I have ever showed it much but I am batshit insane in general about Time and pray for Mari because she has to witness it every month #this is also one of the reason I love them #tbhk analysis #the way I made them in one of my au in 2020 was actually A LOT like what we have now and I am dying

[nameless-ghoul-trash]

Papa emeritus IV X Ghoul!Mom!F!Reader

Part 2

-

Word count: 2.1k

Lightly proofread

Warnings: none.

Part 1 / Part 3

-

You were standing outside the ghouls den waiting for Copia to show up. After you left Copia's office, you had finished your chores. Having finished with an hour to spare and you went back to your room to find it empty. It left you feeling rather empty yourself. You spent a good portion of that time thinking over the who scenario before heading for the to head to the den, bringing you to the present. Watching Copia turn the corner. He had fixed his paints, looking nothing of how he did at your last meeting. You call out a greeting. "Hello, Copia. Are you ready?" Smiling he replied. "Yes, fiore! I have had some time to think over everything." Moving over to the door he knocked, he waited a second and then pushed the door open. He seemed to be in a rush. Probably wanting to get this over with. Following behind Copia, you smile. In the middle of the common room was a ghoul pile, and in the middle lay Aether. Happy purrs and chatters could be heard coming from the pile.

Rain was the first to pop his head up. "Hi Papa, Ma." He greats you both and continues. "What are you guys doing?" One by one, you see the rest look towards the two of you. "It had come to my attention that I needed to come talk to all of you as a group. Solo noi come una famiglia." In the process of talking, Copia his way to sit on the floor in front of the ghoul pile. He turns and gestures for you to join him.

Taking a seat the ghouls before you untangle themselves from each other. Once everybody is sitting up, Copia began. "I know today did not go as we expected. Some painful information was dropped on us all." He talked to them as if he were a father talking to his children. Voice gentle, understanding, and caring. "This is something we will need to work through together." There was a pause."Why is this happening?" Mountain was the first to speak out. His voice was unsteady. "It is my fault. I have not been performing my duties as Papa as well as I should be. I am not matching up with the expectation. This is the punishment that was deemed necessary. I tried to get Sister Imperator to reconsider with nothing to show for it." He was being completely honest. Guilt written all over his face. He was not hiding any information from the band.

"That's bullshit!" Sodo's angry voice cuts through the air, causing Copiato stiffen. "You work harder than most! How do you not meet the expectations. Almost all of our past rituals have been successes. You do the workload of at least three people. What do they actually expect from you! Sure, you're a ditz sometimes, but come on." Sodo looked exasperated. "He's right. You don't deserve this. We don't deserve this." Cumulus commented. "I agree." Rain and Curris added in unison. "What are we going to do? They are taking away a vital part of our group. Swapping an experienced guitarist for someone new!" Swiss voiced his thoughts, which was followed by Mountains. "There is also no guarantee that the new one will end up being any good either." You just sat there listening to what everyone had to say. "I hear your concerns. I have similar concerns as well. We will need to do our best to accommodate to the changes. It will be a learning process for us all." Copia does his best to ease their concerns.

You become painful aware of the guilt and sadness that had spread across Aether's face. His voice broke your heart when he chose to speak. You had to resist the urge to crawl over and hold him. "What of me?" It came out broken, almost scared of the answer. All eyes were on him the moment the words left his mouth. "What will happen to me?" He voiced a little clearer. Copia's face softened even more. "Do not worry, Aether. You will remain here. You may be pulled from the band, but you are not any less one of us. I will die before I let anyone rip you from your home. " There was a spark of a feeling you couldn't quite pin point with the was his voice dropped to almost that of a threatening tone. A wave of relief rushed over Aether. The others also seemed pleased with that answer. "I don't know if this arrangement is going to be temporary or permanent. I'm not going to promise either to you all. I need you to know that I am always on your side, and I will always do my best for you guys." Copia continued. "Papa informed me that the new ghoul will be summoned next Friday. They will be fresh and in need of a guide. Aether, would you be comfortable taking that role?" You asked.

Watching a small smile creep up to his face, he accepted. "I think I can do that." Copia take over again. "Thank you. They will move into one of the open rooms. We give them two or three day to adjust once they arrive. After their training will begin. I would like you all to welcome them with open minds and kindness. They did not choose this, and they are not to blame." Everyone responded in some way, weather it be vocalized or a gesture. Patting Copia's shoulder, you proceed to stand, letting them finish the conversion without you. Watching you walk through the door, Copia let out a sigh.

Looking back at his ghouls, he becomes aware of them all staring at him with either a stupid grin or an expectant look on their faces. "What?" Copia questions. "We totally see what's happening." Aurora giggled out. "See what?" He stares back, confusion clearly written across his painted face. "That look." She pushes again. His brows furrowed deeper. "Did I mess up my paint?" He brings a hand up to his face, but not quite touching. This causes a couple of them to chuckle at his obviousness. "No, Papa. Your paints are fine." Cirrus reassures. "Then what is it?" His confusion turning to frustration. "(Y/N), Papa. We know you've got a thing for her." Swiss interjected.

Feeling the heat of embarrassment creep up his neck and warm his face, he looked to the side. "I do not know what you're talking about." He denied. "We noticed a while ago. You don't hide it very well." Cumulus commented, giggling at the man. "Don't feel bad about it." She added, trying to confort him. Facing them, he let another sigh fall from his lips. "Is it really that obvious?" Sodo barked a laughing. "Painfully so. I wouldn't be surprised if most of the ministry knew."

"You ever going to make a move?" Aether pried. Copia ran a hand through his hair. The thought of approaching you about his attraction to you had crossed his mind countless times. He ran into the same problem every time. "I don't know how." The confession stund the group. "What do you mean you don't know how? Get her flowers. Invite her to dinner. I've never seen her with anyone, so at least you've got a shot." Sodo throws at him. Copia made an exasperated gesture. "Satanas! I know that! But I don't know her favorite flower, nor what her favorite food is, not even her favorite color. Non so niente di lei! Even after all my years of knowing her, I do not truly know her." He tries to voice low. The room quiets.

Realization hits each of them like a ton of bricks. None of them knew much, if anything, about you. They knew you worked hard and hardly complained. You had always lended a helping hand to anyone in need. You listened, gave advice, never judged, and always took care of everyone. That's when the guilt crept in. You were all these thing for them, yet they hadn't taken the time to learn about you. Satan, they had been in your room and hadn't even noticed any consistent colors that would indicate a favor. All except one.

The room remained in a thick silence until Rain broke it. "I guess none of - " Sodo interrupts him. "She always smells of lemon grass and sage. Never strongly but enough that when she holds me, I can smell it. So she probably spends some time on that side of the garden. She also has a pressed (Favorite Flower) framed beside her bed. I know she has not been with anyone at least in the last year or so because I would smell it on her. I'm around her enough that I would notice. She rarely smells of anyone but us long enough for it to be noticeable. That'll at least give you a start." Sodos voice was soft as he played with his fingers, seemingly embarrassed. Everyone just looked at him shocked. His grumpy attitude returning he looked around. "What? Surprised I actually pay attention?" He bit out. Copia smiles. "That is actually very helpful. Thank you." He was sincere in his appreciation for the fire ghoul.

------

In the kitchen, you settled at the sink to do the task at hand. Almost finished, you hear the door and then the thuding of footsteps. Coming to stand beside you, Copia looks at you. "You did amazing in there. See, you didn't need me, and they have your back." You smile at him. He just takes you in for a minute. From the base of your horns, the curve of your lips exposing the sharp points of your fangs to the beautiful (E/C) of your eyes. A warm feel makes its home in his chest. "Sí, il mio fiore, you were correct." Continuing your work, you ask."Do you feel better now?" "Yes very much so." "Good! It's going to be a bumpy road, just know that you have people who have your back." You beemed at him.

Copia paused for a minute. Now was as good a time as ever. Willing his nerves not to show, he tried to discreetly let out a breath. "Um, (Y/N), I have a question." Not stopping your work, you giggled. "Shoot." "Would you be apposed to have having dinner with me." The question surprised you, halting your actions, you look at him. He was visible nervous. Suddenly, a wave of your own dread and fear crash over you. "Like a date?" You question back. "Not if you don't want it to be. It could be just dinner as friends. You don't have to do anything that you're not comfortable with." He was rambled on. The tension was clear as day, both panicking for different reasons. You steeled yourself, trying to rein in your emotions. Dinner was just that, dinner. As much as you were afraid, you were also lonely.

You were tired of the loneliness if you were honest with yourself. You had spent many years being careful of what you let happen in your life, that in the end you neglected yourself all the same. Having lost your closest friend over five years ago, you never really opened up to anyone after that. The closest you had come was the time you had spent with a certain ghoul.

It was just dinner. You were not laying yourself bare to him or spilling you secrets. It was eating a nice meal with a good man. You could not deny your attraction to the human. More than once, she had caught her eyes wondering over to him when in the same room.

Giving him a smile, you make eye contact. "I would like that." His words died on his tongue. It is him who looked surprised now. "Wait, really?" Drying your hands, you turn your body to face him. "Yeah! I think that it would be nice." "Oh well! Good, good." A slight awkward air fell between the two. He honestly had not expected to get this far. "Umm, how about Saturday? Does that work for you?" You lay your hand on his shoulder. "Yes, Copia. That works for me." Copia looks to the sink and back to you. "Would you want any help finishing?" He asks. "If you would like to, you can dry as I finish washing." Taking off his gloves, he grabs the towel, and they finish the dishes together.

------

No one can convince me that Sodo would not cling to someone he veiws as a motherly figure. I will die on that hill. I hope you enjoyed part 2. As always, feedback and requests are always appreciated and encouraged.

Tag list:

@water-ghoulette

@thirstyroses-world

Here's another photo from the ritual!

#ghost bc #nameless ghouls #papa emeritus iv #swiss ghoul #aether ghoul #aurora ghoulette #cardinal copia #cirrus ghoulette #copia #dewdrop ghoul #copia x reader #papa copia #papa emeritus iv x reader #papa x reader #phantom ghoul #aether #aether ghost #sodo ghost #sodo ghoul #sodo #rain ghoul #rain #nameless ghoul swiss #swiss #swiss ghost #nameless ghoulettes #cumulus ghoulette #aurora #nameless ghoul #nameless ghoul mountain

[keirawantstocry]

hi hi, tis I 💋anon. I would like to say both fics were fucking FANTASTIC OMG. (also the terezicaptor bit was also so fucking cool?? youre both so cool????) Im also assuming the aggressive makeout means you liked it? So in a kinda? similar vein-

Vampire Pac and either Fit or Tubbo bleeding? or both (I was thinkin period but like, cooking or fighting also work wonderfully). could so go him fawning over them when theyre bleeding or like, agressive protective, borderline controlling not letting them do Anyhing (or a uh.. different direction cougg cough) I dont have much other than simply Vibes to give srry that this is so chaotic.

hope you're having a good day! sorry that val wasnt great, many many kisses, both agressive and soft, you deserve all of em :>

THANK YOU <3 no you're so cool! Aggressive makeout mean im In Love with you, gen ur the fucking sweetest <3

The first time they noticed how protective Pac was was when they were cooking. It was an accident. A slip of Fit's hand and the knife was being fumbled in his hand. 

"Ouch," he hissed as the blood trickled down his palm. 

Tubbo saw the change in Pac instantly. The way his eyes widened, his pupils darkening as his fangs pushed past his lips. Pac rushed over, grabbing a band aid as he did. Cradling Fit's hand gently, he licked the blood gently off the other man's hand while Fit and Tubbo watched curiously. He laid down the band aid with a sealing kiss. 

Only Tubbo noticed how possessive he turned afterwards. How he seemed to fawn over Fit's every move to try and prevent him from getting hurt in any capacity. While Fit was opening the oven, Tubbo grabbed Pac by the arm and pulled him close. “You're being so protective,” he teased as Pac flushed. 

“I just care about you guys, okay?” 

“Yeah, okay, bossman.”

Pac huffed. “I'm serious.” 

“Yeah, okay. It's totally not some weird ass vampire instinct shit that tells you to protect us from everything.” 

“Cale-se.”

-

He was nearly unbearable when the men were on their periods. Something about being able to smell the blood coming out of them made him feral as a dog. They had to get used to being wrapped up in blankets while Pac ran around trying to pamper them as much as humanly possible. 

Their friends learned to stay away very quickly. When Pac was deep in his instincts he was a kill first, ask questions later type of guy. After two near attacks, everyone knew to stay far far away if they smelled blood coming from the house. 

“Part of me is sad they don't try and come around,” Tubbo whispered to Fit the moment Pac left the room. They were curled up in bed together pretending they were annoyed at the pampering but loving it. 

“Why?” Fit asked, squinting at him. 

“Hot.” 

He laughed, open and honest. 

The door cracked open and Pac stuck his head in with slitted eyes. “I heard that.” 

Tubbo rolled his eyes. “Oh so I'm not allowed to call you hot now? Wowwwww, I see how it is.” The next moment he was bending over in pain and Pac was rushing over to bring him a new hot pad. 

“Now, now, now, you see what happens when you bitch at me. Take the coddling. Rest.” 

Tubbo rolled his eyes but he was smiling. “Yes, sir,” he said with a mocking salute. “Just don't rip anyone to shreds without us. I want something to drool over.” 

#qsmp #my writing #fanfiction #poly morning crew #q!tubbo #q!fit #q!pac #heres some poly morning crew to recover from our streamer losing 3/3 guys #💋 anon

[sisterofficerlucychen]

I had a random non-Chenford thought. So Tamara is moving out (sobs), there was a lot of talk this episode between Nolan and Celina about her roommate troubles, Lisseth was in that “Lucy apartment/room set tour” video Melissa posted……what if Celina moves in with Lucy when Tamara moves out??

OH MY GOD WAIT YES PLS ♡

i know 😭 still v sad about tamara moving out and also wondering if she will because part of me wonders if she'll leave lucy in the midst of a break up? tho lucy internalizes so much that i could easily see her pretending to be okay for the sake of encouraging tamara? so i think it could go either way.

that said, if it's the latter and lucy assures tamara she's fine and tamara does move out, pls gimme lucy and celina as roommates. that would be so cute????? like i'm just imagining them talking about their astrological signs and boys over dinner or hanging out in each other's rooms 😂

on a deeper level i'd love to see the relationship between these two get explored more because they have the potential to be such amazing friends!

we've already seen that they get along pretty well and in terms of where everyone is at in life, they're at a similar-ish place? at least with where the rest of the women we see on the show are — they're the closest to each other in age (at least lucy to celina), they don't have kids or are married, plus lucy could be the role model celina needs? as lucy came up as a rookie, she had nyla to look up to as a woman of color on the force who helped guide her - celina seems to be missing this. they also have childhoods and parental trauma to bond over lol.

thanks for pointing this out! ♡ both felt a little random like tamara asking lucy if it was a bad time to tell her about it when it seemed like she hadn't left her bed (or was going to) and also celina just bringing it up out of nowhere (unless i missed something which i could have bc my attention was not on their storyline lmao) that it would make a lot of sense if this is where they're headed and what they're setting them up for? bc i thought it was chenford moving in together but jk on that for now (rip) lol. like i remember the video but figured lisseth was just looking for melissa not that they could have possibly been filming a scene together in her apartment 👀

#answered #anonymous #the rookie #the rookie spoilers #lucy chen #celina juarez #tamara colins

[rosepascal]

thinking abt perv eddie. just in general. anything smut wise with him 🙏🙏🙏🙏 on my knees

oh my god yes

warnings: NSFW, Minors DNI, fingering, exhibitionism, eddie fingers u in a movie theater, eddie also calls u princess and u wear a skirt

join my 100 follower celebration!

“Eddie!” You swat his hand away from the hem of your skirt.

When Eddie had asked you out for dinner and a movie you had happily agreed. You always liked Eddie. He was cute and funny. His eyes may linger a little too long at your chest but he was always sweet.

“Come on princess, you’re killing me in that pretty thing.” He winks as he rests his hand on your thigh.

You bite your lip as he gently runs his thumb across your bare skin. The lights in the theater dim and you sigh softly, thinking Eddie would focus on the movie now. To your surprise he does the opposite.

With the cover of darkness Eddie gets bolder than before. He won’t tell you yet but you’ve been driving him absolutely crazy.

The short skirts, the sweet smile, and most of all that vanilla perfume you use. Fuck. He dreams of that. Every time he gets a whiff in the halls he has to excuse himself for a moment.

Of course you’re wearing it again today but this time he’s going to do something about it. His hand inches higher and higher until he can feel the lace of your panties. Your fingers are gripping your soda tightly.

“Eddie..” You whisper quietly. A hint of desperation in your voice as Eddie begins to rub his fingers along the top of them.

“Shh Princess, can’t talk during the movie.” You let out a small moan as he hooks his fingers and pulls your panties down quickly.

A small squeak of shock comes out and you quickly look around to see if anyone notices. Thankfully everyone seems to be too occupied with the movie.

Eddie gives you no time to relax as he brings his fingers to your exposed pussy. Your underwear now in his pocket, a souvenir for later. Your eyes flutter shut as he rubs your clit roughly.

It takes everything you have not to moan loudly as he slips two of his fingers deep into your cunt. The sound is absolutely filthy as moves slow and hard.

The noise from the film covers it but even if it didn’t you aren’t sure if you’d care. You’ve never felt so dirty and so good before.

His fingers are working magic as you squirm in your seat. Eddie’s eyes are staring at the screen but steals glances to watch as you come undone on his fingers.

“Oh Eddie!” You quietly moan in his ear.

“Such a dirty girl..” Eddie teases.

“Getting fucked out by the town freak in a movie theater.” He punctuates his words by roughly fucking his fingers into you.

“M’so close.” You whisper and Eddie just smirks.

The pleasure courses through your body as you get closer to your orgasm. You let out a choked gasp as he rips his fingers from your cunt.

The pleasure fades away making you want to cry. Looking over in shock you watch as Eddie licks his fingers clean.

“Aw don’t look so sad princess. The movie’s not over yet.”

#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson smut #eddie munson imagine

[intrstellarhearts]

✰ the dead poets society ice skating headcanons!

a/n: i tried to find the least heartbreaking "dead poets society winter" image, so PLEASE DON'T BE SAD EVERYONE! THEY'RE ALL OK IN THIS HEADCANON SET I PROMISE :)

✰✰✰✰✰

the idea came to neil in a dream.

swirling snow had cleared to show a frozen lake... THE lake he often spent his time at when it was nice outside, and he just knew.

he had to get the dead poet's society to go ice skating.

it would be tough; he wasn't completely sure how he would even get ice skates. and yet, neil perry was determined that this was what needed to happen.

it was a whole operation too!

meeks and pitts were the perfect men for the job of securing the ice skates.

the two of them were so in tune with each other that they could get in & get out of the storage closet near the gym.

plus pitts has really long arms (at least in my opinion) so he could reach in and grab the skates if they were in a super tight spot.

they were able to get in, take seven pairs of skates, and run out with no consequences.

mission one accomplished.

then there was the issue of figuring out if the lake was actually frozen or not.

though cameron said it was dangerous numerous times, he was dragged outside anyway to watch what was to unfold.

it was on this particularly frigid day that one charlie dalton put on his swim trunks and goggles underneath his heavy winter coat and ventured out onto the lake to see if it could hold his weight.

knox was supposedly ready to retrieve charlie if he fell, but that little shrimp probably couldn't even lift an apple off the ground.

oops

anyways, cameron was ACTUALLY ready, despite him also being less than ripped.

but hey, it's the thought that counts.

lucky for our favorite boys, charlie didn't fall though the ice that day.

in fact, even when he slipped and fell onto the lake, the thick layer didn't so much as crack.

i think we can all visualize neil perry's woops and smile when he realized his plan was actually going to work.

after dinner that night, when the stars were just beginning to show themselves, a small yet steady bit of snow began to fall from the sky.

welton was so peaceful in the winter.

and that peace was interrupted by seven excitable boys jumping around and throwing snowballs at each other.

choruses of laughter followed by shushing repeated numerous times through the long walk to the lake.

they're all bundled up, hats and gloves illuminating red cheeks & noses.

but there is a sort of spotlight on our hero, todd anderson, who has chosen to wear not one, not two, not three, not four (bear with me here), not five, not six, but SEVEN layers of clothing.

there are two pairs of pants, an undershirt, two long sleeve shirts, a sweatshirt, and a jacket.

neil has to keep his arm around him, for he literally can't see where he's going.

charlie keeps running around behind him and smacking the back of his jacket as hard as he can; and todd can't feel a thing.

at least he's warm!

skating proves to be a bit of a challenge. it's not like an ice rink where you can hold on to the side walls.

they have to hold on to each other.

what's this? ah yes. stephen meeks and gerard pitts are strangely very talented at skating, and have already moved quite far from the others, who are having an... interesting time.

cameron is quite a good skater as well, though he occasionally stops with his hands out, moments from a faceplant.

charlie dalton skates like a penguin walks; unsteadily, yet it somehow works. he attempts to spin, and in a cruel twist from the icy winds, falls and slides a few feet before sticking his gloved hand up in a "thumbs up" gesture.

knox overstreet is trying to be elegant, and yet looks more like he is walking, jerkily trying to navigate the slippery surface.

and here is neil perry, our mastermind of this whole trip, trying to convince todd anderson to step onto the ice.

it's not that todd doesn't want to skate. of COURSE he does. he knows that neil wanted nothing more than to do this, and he wouldn't want to ruin it.

but for some reason, he just can't seem to get up the nerve to skate.

he is ambushed quickly by a fleeting memory of his brother jeffrey, gliding across the ice when they were both much younger. he thinks of how he wanted so badly to be like him.

and so, with neil perry's hand in his, todd anderson's skate makes contact with the ice.

it takes a moment, (it always does), and yet he knows that his friends are by his side, ready to catch him.

he looks over to see neil perry's ecstatic face, that smile brightening the darkness of the night. he then sees it change, neil's mouth is an "o" shape as he fumbles to reach for todd, but neil is too late, and he is falling.

but funnily enough, instead of the yelp he expected, he finds himself laughing.

his body lands on the ice, but his head in the snow. crisis averted.

and as he lifts himself, clinging to neil for support, our hero realizes he's not afraid of falling anymore.

#dead poets society headcanons #dead poets headcanons #dps headcanons #dps #dead poets society #dead poets #richard cameron #todd anderson #neil perry #stephen meeks #a lil anderperry wink wink ofc #charlie dalton #gerard pitts #i love the dps with all my heart #they are silly little winter goofballs

[piglet26]

Star Wars Rewatch: TROS

Oh, God.

Palpatine come back and ruining Anakin Skywalker's redemption. Why? How? Cloning, okay, so this Palpatine isn't the real Palpatine?!

We get to see Supreme Leader Kylo Ren for about 4 minutes before he's immediately benched by Palpatine as co-pilot. Why? I get they didn't want Kylo Ren as the big bad, but this is just lazy writing.

Green goblin, I remember you don't last long.

R2D2, they never wash him or nothing?

Maybe the First Order should win. They take hits and keep on knocking. They take losses and recovered, quickly and well. They always seem to have intelligence from somewhere. In short, they are competent.

Poe and Finn, have a great dynamic.

Rey is finally training for everyone who had a boner for two movies about her having a rocky fight montage.

They moment where Ren is praying over Darth Vader's mask and his mind bridges with Rey is a great reminder that these two are connected.

This film did something most franchise should never, it responded to criticism in real time.

Poe, you fucked up Han's ship. Stop attacking like she doesn't have a reason to be annoyed. Also, Rey is currently the sole Jedi in the galaxy, she should be training, not running off on every errand you have to do.

Colin Travano (whatever his name is) I wouldn't have wanted his script. Like at all. Poe and Rey do have chemistry though and you can tell they enjoy needling one another. It's just not endgame.

That Finnrey hug was awkward. It's a church hug with their butts sticking out. I'm Reylo to the core, but I have place for FinnRey in my heart. They're soulmates in a different way than Reylo is. Also, Daisy Ridley and John B are adorable and you can tell they enjoy working together.

In a flawed film, Rose Tico being sidelined was a wise decision.

Rey, Poe, Finn, Chewie and 3PO are cute. JJ Adams did seem to love friendships developing and for the third film we needed to see all these characters together on an adventure.

Kylo Ren is forging this dumb ass mask again. Look it worked initially, character wise and so forth, but at this point?! He smashed it and moved past the need for it. The audience liked that he smashed it. We have to see his face for emotional scenes. Why is it back? Oh I know! Because JJ Adams good juvenile friend was sad his mask wasn't in the film anymore. General Hux and Kylo are magically little bottle of goodness. We got so little.

We leave one planet for another planet but I keep forgetting what planet we're on. Title cards too much to ask?

Ren is actually pursuing Rey or The Scavenger because yes he wants her for himself. but he also wants to protect her from Palpatine. Their first force bond......... yeah. I've read the novelization so I understand it's been a minute since they've seen one another, but if I just watched the movie would I have known that? No. There is much they saying yet it's stiff and doesn't make much sense without context.

General Pryde. Why did we need him when we have General Hux?

I think Billie D Williams filmed all his scenes sitting down. He looks happy to be there but tired as hell.

Race through the desert of Pasaana. I like it. This crew does work and it feels like a fun adventure. There are cute, whitty moments between all of them and it works.

She heals a snake - Two halves of the dyad should only have been able to heal one another, but here we are.

The Trio and Co find the evil sith ship or whatever. The Knights of Ren gotta walk while Ren is flying. Ren tries to run down Rey, again this make sense in the novelization and not at all in real life. After Rey injures his planes, he crashes and the majestic prince emerges out of the flames. Seriously?! Why the hell are you covering this guy up?!

In a rip off of The Last Jedi we get a tug-o-war scene between the ship Chewie is on. It's not as great, but it's a good scene and we see how Rey's powers have grown. We know it's a waste of time though. They're evenly matched. It's a nice surprise when the lighting shoots out. Okay, I don't mind her being a Palpatine. I mind the retconning. I mind Palpatine magically coming back.

Rey confesses to Finn about her dream of her and Kylo Ren on the Sith Throne. Where? We would have liked to have seen this.

This is a nice FinnRey scene. Despite her display of "dark power", her killing Chewie presumably, Finn doesn't look at her any different. She's still Rey to him. He's patient and present and she describes her challenges. We still don't acknowledge Finn is force sensitive. Why isn't he training with Rey?

We are blazing through this movie. That's part of the problem we're just pushing plot points at this point. The movie needs to be more selective about slowing down and concentrating on character development. Something painfully lacking in this film. Even the Reylo scenes are about pushing the plot forward rather than pushing the characters forward.

3PO actually has a storyline this movie. Good for him. Look secondary characters in a trilogy, you get your moments and it ain't gonna be every film.

Zorri and Babu are nice additions. I like Zorri and the fact that Ren kicking her ass actually made her like her. Women supporting women. Were Zorri and Poe a thing. What's a spice runner? A space drug dealer?

Rey's social skills lack a bit. but she's great with Droids.

Wait, Chewie and Ren were both on Ren's Destroyer and they didn't even have a scene together?! Chewie's like an uncle to Ren.

Ren, show up in your boss ass destroyer to get your girl.

Standout lines -

Poe: 3PO! Move your metal ass.

3PO: How dare you we just met.

Finn, Poe and Chewie cowboying through the destroyer. Nice scene, doomed for failure I'm afraid.

Second Reylo forceskype is exposition. First real Reylo scene is exposition. Hey, movies gotta get it done haha but Ren literally is like here's the plot of the movie and everything you've been confused on up until this point. I will say watching the progression of the force bond that their spaces are now physically bleeding into one another. Nice touch. It's also nice to see what they each see when looking at one another through the force bond.

General Hux is the spy. Could've gone farther with this. RIP Dawg

Another FinnRey scene where you begin to understand Rey is pissed off and darker than possibly Finn thought.

Palpatine and Ren scene. I'm so annoyed Palpatine is in this movie.

We meet a ragtime band on horses surprise their former stormtroopers. All of them. From the same company. Sure Jan.

Seeing the death star again, so odd and doesn't look a thing like the original. We see scavenger Rey again.

Reylo fights again because Rey is the denial queen and she's free to take out her aggression on Ren. He likes feral Rey. In another less PG film, they've fought and then boned, but Leia died. Also, Dark Rey.... I'm here for it. Mostly cause it looks cool.

The film makers did the best they could with Carrie's Fisher passing. I thought they handled it with class and dignity while incorporating it into the film.

After Leia's passing and Rey healing it. Ren in his ever presented conflict nature overlooks the water when his father appears. It's poignant and character driven scene. It's beautiful scene about the enduring love of a parent. A flawed parent but a loving one nonetheless. Ben had two of those and he seems to finally understand that now.

Poe has a good scene with Leia's body about being a leader. Something that, despite all the bravado, he finally admits he doesn't know how to do. This would've been a great scene with her alive. Part of the issue people have the sequel trilogy of the lack of respect paid for previous generations. As if they are flawed and bigoted. On screen and off screen. A scene where Finn, Poe or Rey paid respect for the accomplishments of previous generations. Their courage and their bravery. Billie D. feels like just a stand-in.

Palpatine army blows up yet another planet. yawn.

Finn is a general bestow as such by Poe. Good choice. Sanitation worker aside no one knows more about The First Order than someone who was a stormtrooper. Finn reveals Palpatine wanted Rey alive...... then why tell Ren to kill her? Because if Rey didn't go dark then Ren was the fall back or vice versa?

So far it's not a bad film, just a disappointing film. The stuff that made my blood boil is about to come.

Rey isolates herself on Acht-to, burns the ship and we see ghost Luke. Why? She saw herself on the dark throne and she's afraid of herself. This might have meant something. At one point. It just feels like a retcon at this point. She's a Palpatine but Leia and Luke didn't care? Then what the hell were you worried about Ben for? If blood and legacy means nothing.

I'm not one of those people that need everything in a movie to make sense. It's also a space fantasy film, but damn.

Rey leads the Resistance to Exegol, she just doesn't know it. That was handy. No, really the way the movie sliced that together worked very well. Poe and Finn make a great speech about the resistance. Not as rousing as I'd like.

Exegol being the basis for the Sith religion is actually really cool. Wish we could've learned more. Empress Palpatine sounds like a boss ass name.

I hate everything about the ending of this film.

Rey once again goes into the enemy territory without a plan. The resistance doesn't really have one either except gumption.

Ben Solo is back! He's great. He's a hero. He's got great hair. He's likeable. We haven't seen him for 20 minutes, he doesn't say a word except "Ow" We have a beautiful Reylo moment where we Rey and Ben see each other through the Force Bond and she looks at Ben with such relief, joy and love that he's there with her. Ben fight like hell to get to her. This is it! Bendemption. We've waited three films for this. Then they tossed him off a cliff.

While it's a great scene of Rey listening to the previous Jedi's and rising up. I'm so confused how the dyad coming together empowers the devil. Ben has been made completely irrelevant.

I mean, we got a Reylo Kiss! It was epic and then it was over. We were lucky to get that considering Disney started to shy away from Reylo due to all the "controversy" I just hate this so we'll move on.

The hug was nice!

Rey Skywalker?

And that's that

#reylo #ben solo #star wars #finnrey #rey skywalker #rey star wars #kylo ren #kylo x rey #ben solo deserved better #rey nobody

[stormoflina]

hello! I'm sure your anons have been flooded with a lot lol but I wanted to change the subject a little. I'm a little sad that Trent is out until the Atalanta game (don't know if its the first leg or second leg) feel like he's been gone for the whole season. miss watching him play with the team and the last interaction we saw with Dom was with haaland being annoying lol.

Also idk if it's just me but I don't know if Dom is very appreciated by fans on how much he does on the field. I get he's had some off games but he's such an important piece to the midfield especially when it comes to his pace. During the Brighton game the right side was getting torched until he started spending some time there to help on defense and even the man u game when he was subbed off we were winning and then we lost control of the midfield. It was a glaring difference and I'm not bashing on any other player NOT at all or saying they don't bring anything to the team, it's just he's a part of the success to the team and it's not spoken about as much.

anyway have a good day!

Hi lovely! I want to thank you for this wonderful ask, it's always both a pleasure and an honour to read your thoughts, especially when it's so well put together! 🫶🏼

I know I miss Trent so much:( I looked back at the pre-match interview he did this weekend as much as I could find, and as lovely as it was to see him, I just wish he was back on the pitch, doing his magnificent passes as he does. :( I understand that with so many reinjuries, they are being extra careful with him, but I feel like the dates just keep getting pushed back and pushed back and it's stressing me out lol.

With Domi, yeah, the narrative around him has shifted recently. In a sense, I think he, too, became the so called stepchild of the team, same thing that I have called Cody back in the past, of course just under very different circumstances. I do think that now that we are in April and have already seen how the season progressed, out of all the starting midfielders he has had the least luck lol. Meaning that he basically carried that midfield on his back for the first three months, then yes, he both got fatigued and fell off a bit, but also Macca grew more comfortable in his position and role, Endo caught up to the Prem and Curtis had entered into a really good form too. Obviously the attention then shifted to them, which is only natural, they were putting in some fantastic performances. His injury also came at a very wrong time, then I think those weird social media posts that were made about him also didn't help ( I actually have a lot to say about that lol), then when he did came back from months long injury and wasn't dropping 10/10 he was quickly made into (one of the) scapegoat(s). Sadly, it's only natural, and what's even sadder that those 'fans' will only move on from him if they find another player to overly criticize. Agendas work like crazy. Right now, if Endo or Alexis loses the ball, likely no one will say anything, if he does, he gets ripped a new one. At the start of the season, it was the other way around. It's insanely annoying, but that's online fans for you. Also doesn't really help his case, that he is in a very limited role, which is good for the team (nobody has his levels of athleticism and pressing intensity), but it also highlights his weaknesses. I have talked about this before, but going from always being the protected player to the one who has to protect everyone else can't be easy and it's pretty easy to see that it doesn't come natural to him. However, it's a role that every team needs, and I think overall, he does a good job at it.

Haha, anyways, I spend waaay too much time wondering about the psychology behind how these things work, I could talk the pants off of anyone with this lol.

Have a lovely day! <3

Edit: With all that yapping I forgot to tell you that I agree with you regarding Domi. We definitely lost momentum when him, Andy and Mo were subbed off. The midfield especially got run over. Klopp nearly always gets his man management right, it just wasn't his day that day - or anyone's really, I mean we let Antony score. 😅😅

[s-arrynight]

UH are we allowed to ask you questions? Cause I have questions on. The Sillies. (Kinjo and Yuki) Like what are your thoughts on their ship? I see you draw Kinjo with DRA Yuki and the real Yuki and I want to know what you actually think about them.. feel free to go off about it but if not you can just delete this hdshhsd

oh yes of course!!! and i do wanna talk about it, gosh i really haven't elaborated my piece about them yet since this is an art blog n i felt a little annoying when i blow up a tag, THANK YOU!! !!!

I also don't see many people talk about post-sdra2 either. this take, im gonna be minty fresh

kinjomae analysis

DRA Yuki

Canon-speaking, Kinjomae was deliberately called back to in both games. Tsurugi fills the role of the queer survivor in dra the way that Yoruko blatantly does in sdra2 (and the protagonist dies) except, it's less obvious as a main couple because of the way linuj writes, and it also doesn't fit the way some people see stereotyped mlm characters.

Kinjo's entire life is a trauma that is so oriented on staying alone, being alone in his suffering and his profession. He particularly killed the men closest to him, (Teruya, Kouhei, threatening Utsuro, and even his father) and seeing those people die around him leaves him numb. I feel like the Yuki of the first game is another unhealthy contributor to the sad cycle of his life, but ALSO remains to be his biggest savior. Kinjo and Akane are the only characters of DRA to have both 5 free-times, their bond has always been THAT highlight level of important.

DRA Yuki tears into this unhealthy string of Tsurugi's life by literally preventing the one time he felt alone the most. In Yuki's perspective, Tsurugi is such a strong figure but still trusting himself to lean on him, it solidifies both of them and forces them to develop their situations even when Utsuro rips through the Yuki facade. They were partners in crime unknowing that one of them was a criminal, omg, they were the dear rabbit, the along came a spider, the jane and john doe,,,

Tsurugi mentions he can't trust anybody but Yuki, Tsurugi gives Yuki a pass at trying to murder him despite his rigid moral. (not without a punch or two, but impressive.) and when Yuki is on the outsides he is the connected peacekeeper to Kinjo VS. Everyone Else. They are there to hold eachother's hands so they can still reconnect onto the border of the group. Like, the way Yuki shouts main character philosophy in chapter 4 at him while he's fighting everyone else brutally at the dinner table, and once again in chapter 6.

(Teruya, then fulfils this goal of reparation with Rei after they leave the killing game, but not on the mental stability side.) Tsurugi is seemingly independant and incredibly uncontrollable due to his detachment, and yet Yuki is able to have a significant part of influence over his life; as well as the deceased Kisaragi pre-killing game.

Yuki IS and will always be the exception to him and no matter how hard he tries to escape it, it follows him till the remainder of his character arc. In the same way, Tsurugi was the kickstarter to Utsuro's new mindset too. It's the "You can't pull the trigger cause you love me", cause that's what Utsuro-Yuki is to Tsurugi. Utsuro may be the most vile villain in the world to somebody who even considered assisted self defense to be a crime on first thought, and then he STILL proceeded to not take that final shot. He didn't hesitate blowing Mikado up, who arguably wasn't the first source of despair.

anyways i think dra yuki-utsuro/tsurugi are integral, important, and good to know your hizstory

he wants me i want him, we went out, then we (YukiUtsuro) DIED!! /ref

Yuki

Tsurugi would move on to be the worst man to cope in the existence of the franchise, and probably hardly ever move on after the death of DRA Yuki. If Yuki was truly dead he'd have two funerals for his two guypals, and spit on Utsuro's grave pretending not to like him. Plus that bad ending where Tsurugi just wakes up in the middle of the night in cold sweat shows what would sort of happen, he thinks about them too much. However,

Yuki was still a concept of a person who existed in the world. He's not gone, he's just someone in a different form, and still is inside the memory of Kinjo's mind that remains deteriorating. He's like, the same dude but he's in the clutches of EVIL!! and he hates evil. (Kinjo seems to catch onto Mikado's plans early on and then it only amplifies in his duty to stop Utsuro and find Yuki.)

Tsurugi's defeatist attitude to fail saving Teruya and Yuki was very much a falsetto because of the Omake 2 and I truly believe Rei was right that this was their agreed purpose.

The real Yuki has none of these shared moments that Tsurugi can look back on together, but if it was just the memories he wouldn't have acted so patronizing to Utsuro. He's affectionately looking back on the person that Utsuro was, which was just Yuki Maeda. Did Homura Akemi decide to go back in time for 10 years just so Madoka could share moments with her?? Absolutely not, and the same goes for Tsurugi Kinjo, who ran an entire organization which later adopted the name of the goal. As Mikado joked, it's "the love of your life" but it's in the most unconventional messy, dictatorial, and murderous way.

Kinjomae absolutely drives the narrative forward on Yuki's side of the story even if it's significantly relegated mostly to the end. Imagine your entire existence leaning on a few people you can't even remember, but they remember you? One dude sacrifices a guy, one girl sacrifices her body. With Tsurugi's final decrees of (semi) unconditional care for you, you finish the trial with this one-sided trauma bond and a promise to keep the survivors safe. Sora takes on all the karmic debt of Divine Luck, and peace returns in an ending that isn't really elaborated on.

ur now a fugitive awesome trans guyboss with superpowers, and you're just absolutely bawling out of your mind at this point. some blue haired dude in a wheelchair is going to die if you don't help him out with your sora-luck.

nobody talks about this enough but this is THE PERFECT set-up for a postgame friendship to develop, not only are they both survivors, this is the genuine Yuki who isn't hiding apart of an Utsuro disguise. He's alive but now in the body of someone Kinjo despised,,, he hates Akane, he refuses to acknowledge her. he loves yuki. But Yuki remembers her fondly and has to take care of the body, but he probably hates himself. not to mention the INTENSE guilt you would get from feeling anything in it or the dysphoria of even wearing/not wearing the clothes she is??? sdra2 so evil?? soruko died so kinjomae could slowburn.

There's nothing Yuki can do now but go on his quest to potentially get along with this man who is homo-erotically trauma bonded to him and got a whole-ass person killed in the process of ending Utsuro and finding the true Maeda., He also has to go atone to Yoruko and the rest of the gang. as you can see i like kinjomae i think they are a foundational element in the story of dra.

unrelated thinking

their suits are completely black and white i find that silly they match

my partner and i did a voiceover of their final freetime one time cause we were feeling quirky.

#kinjomae #sdra2 #danganronpa another #kites blog

[mdhwrites]

I feel like lately people started to ignore toh, Idk some artists I followed already moved on to other stuff to make content about (if you exclude mark). With Amphibia I think it lasted a year more after it's end till everyone completely moved on and I still can see some fanarts of it.

I guess people who said toh would be timeless may rethink that, it didn't even last a year.

So first: Timeless doesn't mean it will have an eternal fandom. Just that it will always be able to connect with an audience.

Second... I mostly agree. Like my timeline has definitely become MUCH more Amphibia focused nowadays. I don't see a lot of TOH art which... isn't surprising? Lumity was dying by the end of S2 because people just didn't have much to do with them and S3 really highlighted how shallow a lot of the characters and what not were.

It's not surprising that we didn't get the Amphibia of trying deepfake the fandom into thinking new episodes were coming out or a movie was in the works because... What do you do with these characters? MoringMark is doing pure fluff. I've seen a couple that I follow go strong but... Mostly by doing stuff like future children or Lumity as perfect mothers, stuff like that.

And that includes myself. I still do Lumischa but I swapped to AU stuff pretty much exclusively a LONG time ago now because sticking with canon was just... boring. I follow Yukifrill and she recently started doing Blight family stuff due to a dream but she explicitly said that part of why she even can again is because canon can no longer rip apart her headcanons, her desires, etc. like that. That's just kind of an awkward place for a fandom, especially with a show like TOH where most of the characters are mainly their base archtypes.

Buuuut: TOH will always have the shields of Disney meddling and LGBTQIA+ representation. Regardless of how good you think the representation is or if you think the meddling or shortening mattered, it doesn't effect things. Plenty of people will still hold onto TOH being an almost perfect being that we were just robbed from being the ultimate show ever.

This isn't even a joke. In a non-cartoon server I'm a part of, someone decided to bring that another server they were a part of talking about stuff they we were ever robbed from seeing in TOH. Others replied about Disney meddling, representation and how Lumity was still one of the best relationships they'd ever seen in ANY media.

Which, as a romance writer, that last one makes me REAL sad. It also is a sad irony because no one would have bat an eye if not for Disney and now Disney is also the excuse they use for it being bad. That makes me sad as an indie who no one cares about. At least not with his writing.

Because if my work is bad, no one is going to cut me any slack. If I cut corners because my brain is bad, people are just going to put it on blast. I'm an indie after all. Who is holding me back? Certainly nothing like what held TOH back, even if TOH also had an entire team of writers instead of only one.

But when enough time has passed for the knowledge of those excuses not to be common anymore... Will people still be able to excuse TOH for what it is?

Addendum: I want to make something clear since I've been letting my jealousy and personal pain show a bit more recently. I do not hate the show for being popular or successful. Dana and the crew put a lot of work into the show and I'm happy for them that it found so many. That it enriched so many lived. So many creative endeavors never do.

So yes, I get frustrated by the excuses. Get hurt by the cheats no one is willing to talk about. That's as much personal as it is professional though and if I'm just being honest, I'm still happy TOH was made and reached its audience. It means a lot to me just as it does to many others. I would not make these blogs if not for that.

I just wish that my interest in TOH didn't bring with it pain sometimes, but that's a personal problem, not TOH's.

==========

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead, If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

And finally a Twitter you can follow too!

#the owl house criticism #toh critical

[kmhya]

‘86, baby || E. Munson

♡a/n~. a fix it fic if you will. also i didn’t proof read this so possibly riddled w mistakes

you could feel tears coming to your eyes as you heard eddie’s name being called from the stage. maybe it’s silly that you were getting so worked up about your boyfriend’s graduation but after two years of waiting, it didn’t feel real that this was actually happening.

you saw him stand up from his seat on the other side of the stage, a big grin on his face and his waved to the clapping crowd. yes there were as many jeers as there were cheers but did that faze him in the slightest? no. not when he could see his friends and the love of his life in the crowd.

eddie climbed the stairs up to the stage, approaching principal higgins with a shit eating grin on his face. the principal begrudgingly handed his diploma over and shook his hand. eddie gripped the man’s hand tight in response before ripping it out of his grip and turned to the crowd, his hands up in the air as he yelled, ‘86, baby!! it’s finally my year!!’. the crowd erupted in a series of applause and laughter as eddie bounded down the other side of the stage to join the other graduates.

after the ceremony had finished, you raced out of your seats along with the rest of the ‘gang’ to congratulate eddie. he didn’t see you coming until you yelled, ‘EDDIE!!’ at the top of your lungs. you charged into him like a bull and brought the two of you down with the momentum. grabbing his face, you smothered him in kisses and praise as he melted beneath you. ‘i’m so proud of you, ed, so so proud of you!’ you whispered to him. you meant every word of what you said. it wasn’t just the case of eddie overcoming the regular old school system, but being thrust into the world of the upside down, a bald girl with superpowers, and strange meat covered men with an affinity for destroying the world , and getting back up (albeit with a few new scars) and continuing on to get his diploma.

‘can you stop squashing him now and let us congratulate him?’ dustin asked, evidently over this over the top pda he was witnessing before him.

‘can it kid. just because your girlfriend is hundred of miles away doesn’t mean you have to shit on any happy relationship you set your little eyes on’ eddie joked, although there was no malice behind it at all. he stood up, bringing you with him, and took dustin under him arm.

the juniors of the hellfire club all surrounded eddie with slight sadness, saying the hellfire won’t be the same without them. being the drama king he was, eddie made a mini speech about passing the torch to the younger generation and to not miss him too much when he was gone, and after making them all feel worse, he gathered them all into a big hug and said that he’d make time for them play together outside of school.

‘he isn’t the only one who graduated y’know’. robin said flatly as she and robin approaches the group. everyone let out small cheers and claps making the two girls smile bashfully. more hugs and congratulations were exchanged before everyone decided to split up before meeting again later in the evening for a celebratory after party; just their group. the wheelers along with will, jonathan, el, left with their parents. dustin made a move to go with you and eddie but steve just grabbed him by the scruff and hauled his ass over to his car with robin. as they got further away, you could hear dustin’s confused complaints get quieter and quieter before it was just you and eddie left alone in the schools parking lot.

‘where to handsome? wanna head home so you can get changed?’ you asked as you wrapped your arms around his neck, gently combing your hands through the hair that rested there.

‘yeah, heading home sounds-’ he sighed dramatically, using his arms that were resting on your waist draw you in even closer so you were standing nose to nose, ‘-extremely tempting right now. but…not just because i want to get changed to got out. again.’ you grinned at his implication and nudged his nose with yours,

‘oh yeah? what ‘cha got in mind, big boy?’ you murmured. you two were unbearably close now, close enough that parents on the street would scoff and cover their children’s eyes as the passed.

‘wouldn’t you like to know, doll face. wouldn’t you like to know’ eddie laughed. he put an end to the teasing by meeting you in the middle for a kiss. you lips came together like waves colliding in the ocean, seamlessly.

you were so happy that you had eddie. so much could’ve gone wrong in only the past week or so but you both survived it, not without your fair share of permanent reminders, but it was ok, you had each other and all of your friends around you. whatever happened next, you reckoned you could handle it.

#stranger things #eddie munson x reader #gender neutral reader #eddie munson #eddie munson fic #fluff #one shot #reader insert #stranger things fic #fix it fic #alt ending #stranger things 4 spoiler #stranger things 4

[sheeshhhhgooffdude]

A Little Rude of You, Don't you think so? Part 3.

As soon as the sun rose, Heed was already waiting for Flug outside her factory. She squeaked in happiness as soon as she heard a car parking near the factory's entrance. She was ready to jump in Flug's arm but was taken a back when a woman came out of the car. She then proceeds to open the passenger door, Flug comes out smiling and thanking the woman. Her blood boiled just from that interaction. Who was this woman? Flug then turned to her and walked towards her, "Sorry, did I keep you waiting, Heed?", she pouted and crossed her arms, "Yes! Also you didn't inform me that your bringing another person....", she said as one of her eye opened to see if her little act affected him. Flug smiled and brings out a bouquet of Birdsfoot Trefoil flowers, "Sorry, I was held down by some work that I had to finish. And this is my temporary assistant, Himiko because my original assistant went for a vacation.", he said as she turned and smiled as she took the flowers not knowing it's meaning.

The three went in and went down to the laboratory and it made Flug a bit sick since the whole place is literally pink all over. 'Is there any other color to this place other than pink? It a bit sickening to look at.', he said in his mind as they reached where the villain scientists were trying to perfect the formula. Heed looked at him and clinged to Flug's arm, "Fluggy~ I'm just so sad because these braniacs can't get the formula right! But I know that you can do that right?~"she said as she rubbed her hand over his chest and kissed him on the lips. Himiko immediately snapped a picture. He cringe, trying not to puke from her actions, "Of course, I can. After all...... I am the genius scientist of P.E.A.C.E., aren't I? he say, trying no to sound annoyed and disgusted as he moves her hand away from him by cupping them them pushing them towards her chest. She was far too enamoured to even care. Her crush was here. He was here to solve her problem and get her to be the most beloved even without her spraying him with the perfume. 'This must be what true love means~!', her mind screamed as she watched Flug working on the formula. Flug, on the other hand, focused on destroying the very foundations of his thesis. The key to the fumes of the liquid was bringing out the serotonin of the person. All he needed to do was reverse how the formula worked instead of bringing out the serotonin. He'll revise it to make the fumes target the amygdala to evoke anger towards the first person that they see. Which is Heed, as she sprays the liquid to her target's face, the amygdala will activate, and soon as they see her face, the will immediately start hating her. He smiled,'How unfortunate..... now... time for you to do your part, Himiko.', he said as he glanced at Himiko and winked at her.

Last part is here

She understood the signal and pulled out a vial of water colored black. She then proceeded to go to where the giant tanks of Heed's perfume were. Himiko laughed to herself as she saw the pink liquid already looking darker than the normal way it looked because of the formula's revision. Heed snapped from her gaze as soon as she noticed that Himiko was gone. Where was that woman? She then hurriedly ran to where her giant tanks were. Himiko was pouring a black liquid to the main supply! She was furious. How dare this nobody stop her from being the most beloved heroine?! "YOU! HOW DARE YOU TRY AND SABOTAGE MY PLANS?!"she shouted as she ran to attack Himiko out of fury. Himiko took her glasses off and ripped the costume she was wearing to reveal herself as the villain, "Too bad princess. You can't always get what you want." she said as she dodged Heed and kicked her into one of the tanks as the heroine.

She stared and pulled out her phone to post the picture of Heed kissing Flug and picture of Heed falling to the public that tagged everyone with the caption 'Get rekt you cringy heroine #villainy4ever' Everyone immediately saw the picture and broke out of the hypnosis and were very angry. They all went after her as Flug stared down from the metal ramp. He was smiling like a maniac. He succeeded, and now she'll be in shame in the media for a while. Well, until her good old daddy comes to rescue her, of course. But he has to admit taking revenge on her certainly made him the centre of attention now because of the kiss picture. Oh well, at least he wasn't the "villain" in this one, and Himiko was ready to take the credit for that. He soon left the building as soon as the police arrived to arrest Miss Heed. Heed saw Dr. Flug outside and cry out to him, "Fluggy! Help me their try to hurt me!"she cried hysterically. Flug simply smiled at her with fake pity, "Don't worry, you'll be fine. I promise to visit you soon." he said as before waving her goodbye. Unbeknownst to him, he has also attracted unwanted attention from Goldheart, the most popular and strongest hero of P.E.A.C.E.

~Red

#dr flug #villainous #dr kenning flugslys #miss heed #cecilia amanda kelly #villainousfanfic #goldheart #gold heart #herbert leth

[trickarrows-bishop]

I would love to know what fandoms you're into bc I swear I find the randomest shit on my dashboard and they usually correlate with a fandom I'm in.

drum roll please 🥁🥁🥁

GADIES AND LETELMEN. I GIVE TO U . EVERY FUCKING FANDOM (im lying there's no way these are all of them) THAT IM IN

movies, tv and books and yh u get the idea: (no particular order. im reading off a list) - lost in space - do revenge - the sex lives of college girls (leighton murray the beloved <333) - ted lasso (ted is literally just a little guy i love him fr) - free guy - star wars (i haven't watched anything thats new tbh (aka ashoka) BUT IM GETTING THERE) - crush (the best 2022 movie Of All Time) (ignoring that cast drama ofc cuz wtf was that) - warrior nun (beatrice i am on my knees please) - willow (2022) (jade claymore i am single) - hsmtmts (maddox single handily got me to watch season four tbh. saylor bell curda the woman you are. MY GOD-) - hunger games (SAW TBOSBAS YESTERDAY IT FUCKING ATE RAHHHH) - paper girls (i would sell my left kidney for this) (my left kidney hardly works but im sure you get the gesture) - stranger things (atp finn is all i interact w the fandom most of them have acc ruined it. im looking at the stancys, b*lly defenders/stans and the people who basically helped explode steddie. (idm steddie it is just Everywhere) - the half of it (its just a sweet lil movie yk :') ) - tlou (i've only seen the show but ellie is so fucking funny) - mcu (im blaming my father for this one he acc made me watch them from such a young age that the mcu is just in my fucking dna atp. i haven't watched basically any of phase five other than gotg 3 tho BAHAHHFDJFH) - ALSO THE ATSV MOVIES EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE I LOVE EM EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

musicals WOOOOO (yh im kinda a musicals kid moving along): - six the musical (im a lesbian. no explanation needed) - dear evan hansen (cried seeing this live. i am NOT talking about the movie) - & juliet (idk this musical just. ate.) - mean girls (ITS COMING TO THE UK IN SPRING 2024. AND THE MOVIE IN JANUARY IM GONNA BE SOOOOO ANNOYING) - rent (i need like every version of I'll Cover You to be injected to my DNA immediately fanks) - the prom (nothing compares to the lesbian musical of all time (i am NOT talking about the netflix adaption (although araina debose did kinda eat)))

MUSICIANS RAHHH - t swizzle (need u to immediately realise although i am a swiftie i : am aware her music is not for everyone and can accept that she very much is not this perfect person. she has made mistakes in her career . no one is a perfect person. but i will NOT tare this away from her songwriting being fucking insane) - renee rapp (she's the loml she wants me fr (she doesn't know i exist)) (renee releasing any piece of music makes me better and worse at the same time) - holly humberstone (COOLEST FUCKING PERSON ON THE PLANET I LOVE HER MUSIC SM GOD ITS JUST SAD MUSIC RAHHH) - muna (i love cool gay people) - girl in red (see previous point) - sabrina carpenter (although i don't like acc know that many of her songs (rip) she's so fucking cool dude i can't even deny it if i wanted to) - foo fighters (yes i went from taylor swift to foo fighters what about it i love rock music too <3) - arctic monkeys (their music eats next question) - foals (RAHHH AWESOME BAND RAHHHH)

#if i come up w anymore i will add but uhm. yeah. #also my comfort movie is wall-e #i fucking love wall-e <3 #fandoms

[rallamajoop]

Dracula canons in Yuletide 2022

Unsurprisingly, in the wake of that whole Daily Dracula thing, there were a lot of Draculas nominated for this year's Yuletide exchange this year ‒ not just a lot of Dracula characters, but whole different adaptations of the novel. And being that kind of terrible Dracula-nerd, I figured I'd make a list and share some notes on which-version-is-which. Now, I've only seen about half of these, and can't speak to what all the other folks who actually nominated them loved about them, but I'll take any excuse to ramble on about different Dracula-adaptations at this point, so here we go.

We've got a couple of movies, a couple of telemovies, a TV series and even a musical to cover here, so I'm just gonna put them all in chronological order, starting with the novel.

Dracula - Bram Stoker (Novel 1897)

Nominated characters:  Abraham Van Helsing  Arthur Holmwood  The Correspondent  Dracula  John "Jack" Seward  Jonathan Harker  Lucy Westenra  Lucy Westenra's Mother  Mina Murray Harker  Mr. Hawkins  Mr. Swales  Quincey Morris

Damn, Daily Dracula has done it's thing: folks have nominated basically everyone. (Well... except Sister Agatha. GDI, where's Sister Agatha, people?! Has that 2020 Moffat/Gatiss version put everyone off?)

But, moving onto the adaptations-

1. Dracula (Movies - Hammer) (1958-1974)

Nominated characters:  Dracula  Lawrence Van Helsing | J. Van Helsing  Lorrimer Van Helsing

Okay, yes ‒ this nomination was me. Look, Peter Cushing's Van Helsing was being reincarnated into whole new eras and having confusing chemistry with Christopher Lee's Dracula long before anyone ever thought to do the reincarnation-thing with Mina, and I want all the fic about it, is that so wrong? (Or, you know, the excuse to write some myself. Or really anything about these versions of the characters interacting ‒ I'm not picky!)

2. Count Dracula (1977)

Nominated characters:  Abraham Van Helsing  Jonathan Harker  Mina Harker  Renfield

One of the two British telemovie Dracula adaptations to come out of the 1970's (the 70's was a BIG decade for Dracula). This one was the more faithful to the novel ‒ too faithful, if anything, since some new ideas or creative storytelling could have gone a long way to distract from the limitations of the budget. That said, I did like their Dracula: the costuming isn't much to write home about, but he has enough presence to elevate every scene he's in (and, I mean, if you're going to get one thing really right in a Dracula adaptation...)

3. Dracula (2006)

Nominated characters:  Abraham Van Helsing  John Seward  Lucy Holmwood  Mina Murray

Yet another British television Dracula, this time one where Arthur Holmwood is tricked into helping bring Dracula to British shores by a vampire-worshipping cult, in the mistaken belief the Count can somehow cure him of congenital syphilis. No, really! Seriously though, my biggest disappointment with this one was it didn't go wild and weird enough ‒ the sad soap opera life of Arthur & friends just can't hope to compete with all that high-gothic camp, and 90 minutes just isn't time for all these ideas to breathe. But it must be said, Marc Warren makes a surprisingly compelling Dracula, and his one big vampire-sex-scene with Lucy is... quite something. Basically, I can definitely see why someone might want fic about these versions of the characters ‒ there's lots in this universe left to expand on.

4. Dracula: l'amour plus fort que la mort - Ouali (2011)

Nominated characters:  Jonathan Harker  Poison  Satine  Sorci

Well, okay. This one is, er, a French musical version? XD God, do I love the stuff you'll find nominated for Yuletide! So: not a version I'm familiar with, but going by this one summary I found, what we have here is one of the (MANY) post-1991-Coppola-version rip-offs where Mina is a reincarnation of Dracula's wife... but also one where Dracula hasn't spoken since his wife's death, and now employs three very gloriously campy servants to speak for him (Poison, Satine and Sorci, from the noms above). As someone who doesn't speak a word of French and knows this thing only from 5 minutes on youtube (I mean, the whole show's up there, though the quality's not great), these three are great value, and I can totally see why someone would nominate them for Yuletide.

5. Dracula (TV 2013)

Nominated characters:  Lucy Westenra  Mina Murray  Alexander Grayson | Dracula  Jayne Wetherby

A short-lived TV series reimagining of Dracula, where the Count shows up in London posing as an American steampunk inventor called Alexander Grayson, and yet another of the (many) post-Coppola versions where Mina is the reincarnation of Dracula's tragically-dead-wife, etc. Admittedly, this is an adaptation I know only by its reputation as the show that that finally gave us lesbian!Lucy (!!!) only to have her turn around and sleep with Jonathan for dubious plot reasons (theFUCK?) ‒ but I'd be the last to judge anyone who enjoyed it as a guilty pleasure and/or just wants to run away with the characters and let them have some real fun.

6. Bram Stoker’s Van Helsing (2021)

Nominated characters:  Abraham Van Helsing  Arthur Holmwood  John Seward  Lucy Westenra

Huh. Well, okay. First point: the poster is a lie ‒ this actually seems to be a fairly-straight, (very) low-budget film adaptation of the novel ‒ just one that starts about when Van Helsing arrives (ie, when Lucy is already very ill). So, more drawing-room-drama than Hugh-Jackman-material. Have not seen it, but have a trailer! Now you know just about as much about it as I do.

Honourable mentions

In the "do I even count this?" bonus round, we've also got the 2016 Van Helsing TV series (nominated characters: Axel Miller and Catherine) ‒ a show set post-vampire!apocalypse and starring a Van Helsing descendant. There's also a character called Van Helsing nominated for the Kyuuketsuki Sugu Shinu | The Vampire Dies in No Time manga, and a "Dracula Vance" nominated for a video game called Panilla Saga, about whom google will tell me nothing very illuminating. Ah, well. Seriously though, the total number of different Van Helsings nominated in this year's Yuletide must be some kind of record.

I'd also be remiss not to mention that the original 1872 Carmilla is also nominated, as is the excellent 1970 Hammer adaptation The Vampire Lovers. And rounding out our list of Victorian vampire lit, some weirdo has also nominated Varney the Vampire, but that one really needs its whole own post...

#Dracula #Dracula Daily #Yuletide 2022 #Hammer Dracula #Count Dracula (1977) #Dracula (2006) #Dracula: l'amour plus fort que la mort #Dracula (2013) #Bram Stoker’s Van Helsing (2021)