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ellecdc · 3 months

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We need dating remus lupin general headcanons with YOUR wonderful writing. Please. 🫶🏻

I don't know if this is my best work - but hopefully this is what you were looking for. Thanks for being here with me <3

Dating Remus Lupin Headcanons

This man was completely oblivious to the draw he had on other people – including you. His quiet, sarcastic, mischievous but kind persona meant he had a lot of admirers that he never did anything about

I fully believe Remus Lupin was the biggest flirt without necessarily realizing it (or if he did realize it, it wasn’t a conscious action - he really didn’t mean to be flirty, he just was)

Also don’t believe he knew how fuckin’ hot he was: denim jackets, oversized cardigans and knitted jumpers, converse, beanies - like he always looked so comfortable and casual but so put together despite of it?

Stealing his clothes is actually a dream of mine – his denim jacket with patches sewed on and a hole or two????? Need it

Curling up in one of his sweaters and warm socks by the fire? Fuckin’ hell

His friends knew better than to ever try to (outwardly) set him up with anyone since he was so damn stubborn, so they would just happen to be in the library at the same time as you [the person they’d seen him bantering with in class time and time again] and also just happen to say hey and decide to catch up with you and then also just happen to sit at your table since they were already standing here talking to you anyway.

Forced library dates that neither of you really realized were dates, courtesy of his friends

Remus caught on after a little while what his friends were trying to do, but didn’t mention anything in case you hadn’t realized yourself; he wouldn’t want to embarrass you

And welcome to the one thing we all sort of hate about Remus Lupin: he of course believed nothing would/could/should ever come about between the two of you

I believe him to be somewhat flighty – the second he realizes he’s falling for you, or, God forbid, realizes you’re falling for him – he hightails it

Not for long though, I really don’t see James Potter letting him get away with that (Remus is stubborn so he gets ‘his way’ for at least a little before James forces the two of your out of your mutual misery)

I think you guys would grow closer and closer without ever actually saying anything about it:

Sitting beside each other would turn into leaning against one another

Leaning against one another would become the odd cuddle session

Walking together to class would turn into a gentle hand on the small of your back guiding you through the castle (but also to keep you close) [this is that mentioned unknowingly flirty side]

Hand on the small of your back would turn into his arm around your shoulder or your hand in his

And he would prefer it this way, afraid that saying anything would make it too real (flighty), or, that you would deny having feelings for him and that would hurt in an entirely different way

You tried to be okay with it – to pretend that you were satisfied with whatever Remus was willing to give you because, come on, he was one of the most popular boys in school, he was the most well-liked Marauder, he was super smart and a powerful wizard, and he was so sweet to you.

But after a while, you couldn’t deny how much this unspoken space between you was weighing on you – particularly the somewhat routine periods where he’d completely shut you out

Was it you? Had you done something?

Was he seeing someone else?

Were you just imaging this whole ‘thing’ between you?

He’d get increasingly agitated – almost like he simultaneously wanted you closer to him and further away from him; you’d never know how to help him in these moments

He’d speak more sharply to you, spoke less in general, and downplayed your friendship/relationship when other people would comment on it

“We’re not even that close, we just study together sometimes” you head him say to Marlene McKinnon

“It’s not like that” he told Benjy Fenwick when he asked if you two were dating

“She’s just a friend.” He’d said to Sirius, and that one hurt because why would he lie to his best friend? And what about you made it so difficult to see you as more than a friend?

Maybe you really had completely imagined the whole thing in your mind? Maybe he really didn’t care for you at all.

You began to pull away – less study dates, more excuses as to why you couldn’t meet up after class, sitting with Lily or Mary at quidditch games instead, staying at Hogwarts on Hogsmeade weekends – anything to avoid having to face the friend that you quickly realized you were halfway in love with who never even gave you a second thought

He did give you a second thought, though – in fact, he gave you a first thought as well as a third, fourth, fifth and sixth

“Do you think I did something to offend Y/N?” He asked James and Sirius one day – the two exchanged a knowing look

“Why do you ask?” James asked with a smirk

“I think she might be avoiding me.”

“Does that bother you, Moons?”

Remus scoffed “of course it bothers me”

“I thought she was just a friend?” Sirius taunted

“Sod off...”

Remus couldn’t ignore it anymore – you weren’t just a friend. Never could be in his mind, he doubts. He would be your friend for the rest of your life if that’s all you ever wanted from him – but he’d probably always hold a candle for you; that’s why this divot you seemed to be carving between you two hurt like hell

He decides to do something very un-Remus like and face this head on (thoughts and prayers)

“Hey Y/N” he said gently as he approached your table in the library

You seemed surprised at seeing him and started packing your things up

“Oh, hi Remus...” and the lack of your usual ‘hey Rem’ furthered his suspicions. “I was just finishing up, actually.”

“Have I done something to upset you?” He blurted suddenly. His assertiveness threw you off kilter – was he...talking? About feelings? You paused in your haste to pack your things

“No?” you said in the form of a question – you knew he picked up on it when the space between his eyebrows dwindled

“Are you sure? I just feel like you’ve been avoiding me lately.”

You were starting to get frustrated. “What do you want, Remus?” You asked sharply. He winced.

“I just miss you, is all.” He admitted quietly as he played with a fray on his sweater between his tantalizingly long fingers.

“What exactly about me do you miss, Remus? You have plenty of friends; I hardly see how Sirius, James or Peter can’t fill the same role.”

He guffaws – actually guffawed! The bastard. “What are you on about?”

“What are you on about, Lupin? I’m tired; I’m tired of being called a friend while you keep me closer. I’m tired of feeling like I’m being played by arguably the most important person in my life. I’m fucking exhausted – so tell me exactly what you’re ‘on about’ Remus, and make it count because I’m done.”

“No! No, not done; don’t be done.”

“What do you want, Remus.” You whispered dismally.

“You.” He whispered back

“Don’t fuck with me, Lupin.”

He couldn’t help but chuckle at you a little bit. “I’m not. I’m not, I swear it – I’m sorry if you’ve felt played by me. I’m sorry if I’ve made you feel anything but loved because... because I do – I love you.”

“Love me?”

“Love you. So much.” He professed as he dared to step closer to you. When you didn’t seem entirely averse to his proximity, he moved to close the gap – enveloping you in a long-needed hug. “I’m sorry.” He apologized again.

“You should be” you murmured petulantly from his chest.

He chuckled and pressed his lips to the top of your head “let me make it up to you?”

And he did – you spent that evening on the astronomy tower, enjoying the view of the stars as they melted into the forbidden forest along the horizon and the rest of the Hogwarts grounds – and he told you his secret, that he was a werewolf

You were the first person he willingly told – James, Sirius, and Peter just figured it out on their own and there was no hiding from them

You were the first person he chose to let in – so uncharacteristic of the lycanthrope, but that just went to show how serious he was about making it up to you and garnering your trust

This changed everything

There was no more pushing you away near full moons, in fact – he got nearly downright territorial

No one else was allowed to sit beside you – that was Remus’ spot

He was irritable and snappy with everyone, but instinctively melted at the sight of you

“I can’t believe we survived Moony all these years without Y/N – she’s like a sedative” Peter muttered as he picked up the cards Remus had thrown at him in a fit during their game of exploding snap. There was no sign of that Moony now – smiling down at you as you sat curled up in his lap like he had nowhere else he’d rather be

I believe Remus was the king of trinkets – his dorm was littered with little bits and bobs he found that he thought were cool/interesting

He started gifting you little things once you began dating

An enamel pin that made him think of you

A small pewter wolf

A cool rock that he thought looked like the colour of your eyes (you didn’t see it, but who were you to argue?)

Little themed snow globes

Flowers he found on his walks

Pretty beads/crystals

Tealight candle holders

The ribbon from a box of chocolates he got from his mum that he thought you would like

Acts. Of. Service. This man didn’t come from money, the way he saw his dad spoiling his mum was through his actions – so this caring attitude came super naturally to him

Fixing up your tea/coffee the way you like before you’ve even thought about it

Carrying your bags/books for you

“Your shoe’s untied, dovey. Give ‘er here.” He said as he patted his thigh for you to place your foot so he could tie it for you

If you got sick/under the weather, he’d totally do your homework for you (his friends have done the same for him due to the moons – pay it forward)

I think he’d be so soft and needy after a moon – just melt into whatever love and care you’re willing to show him; give you complete control and take care of him.

It may have been super hard to get Remus to give love a chance – but once you got it, you were stuck with him because he was not going anywhere

Loyal to a fault

He’s so afraid of losing good things that he’s willing (and desperate) to do anything and everything he can to keep it [i.e., you]

Thankfully, you make it very easy to do <3

#marauders era #marauders fanfiction #ask elle #self insert #reader insert #remus lupin #remus lupin drabble #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin x you #dating Remus Lupin headcanons #dating remus lupin #remus lupin imagine #the marauders #marauders #remus lupin fic #remus lupin fanfiction #ellecdc fics

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krashlite · 2 months

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I think that c!Jimmy liked being a Bad Boy and a Big Dog because for once in this series a role let him be reckless without being mocked/put down by his allies and without truly harming anyone through the risks he took. In this essay I will explore his character through this lens

Jimmy is an extremely optimistic character, almost always seen smiling and laughing about whatever’s going on. Not in the sense that he laughs when he’s nervous, but in the sense that he makes light of whatever scenario he’s in. On a deeper level, this also translates into overconfidence in a glass-half-full type of way. If there’s a chance a plan could go south, he only focuses on the potential benefit. If there’s a chance he loses a fight, he only focuses on winning

This isn’t to say he’s unaware of negative outcomes, he just chooses to ignore them. The result is him making poor decisions over, and over, and over again. Jimmy knows exactly why he did that but from an outside perspective he’s regarded as stupid

This is seen as early as 3rd life, with Scott practically putting him on a leash to stop him from fighting Ren and his army. Specifically when they manage to chase Dogwarts away from Joel’s base, Jimmy goes to give chase and Scott immediately stops him. They’ve won, and he doesn’t understand why Jimmy would push it further. Jimmy, on the other hand, is thinking about how they’ve been chased across the map like rabbits and knows DW will be back unless they establish themselves as a threat. Now’s the perfect time, since they have the upper hand

But again, Scott doesn’t see this. In his mind, the battle is won and they shouldn’t expend more time, energy, or resources on it. Ultimately he doesn’t want to see Jimmy hurt and believes that restricting what Jimmy does will protect him from harm

I think this shows a fundamental difference in how they interact with the world. Scott’s more practical- he only does what he feels is necessary and is humble enough to know when the risk isn’t worth the reward. Jimmy, on the other hand, wants to test the limits and see what he’s able to accomplish through, once again, taking unnecessary risks.

But this is where things get messy

Again, there is a fundamental difference in their thought processes. This causes them to clash, and since Scott is the one who held more “power” in the relationship (being the one to decide many aspects of their base and being the one to make most deals and plans for the both of them), resulted in Scott putting Jimmy down A Lot. This started with Jimmy returning from the desert without several of the armor pieces he left with and continued throughout the war.

Jimmy, in response to this treatment, started acting More reckless as a means to prove himself. He wanted to be seen as just as strong, smart, and capable as the people around him. Ultimately, he wanted to be respected in his own right, and that didn’t really happen this season!

Nor did it happen in LL,

LL was an entire mess for so many reasons and most of it was due to the game mechanic itself. Lives being treated as currency caused rifts in many alliances, especially the Southlands

This coupled with the fact that Jimmy is already back in 3L habits, trying to prove himself constantly, makes an incredibly messy situation. His efforts in monopolizing sugar cane are downplayed and mocked, he spends so much time getting spyglasses just for Mumbo to lose them. These are meant to be harmless jokes (and really, they are) but Jimmy’s coming off of an unbalanced power dynamic and a tiny bit of it eats away at him and he can’t figure out Why.

Jimmy doesn’t understand why he doesn’t feel valued in the team, so he starts looking at arbitrary reasons Why. The reason he settles on is the life count, with Grian’s death making it known that Yellow-Names are on the brink of being exiled.

This comes back to the game mechanic. Jimmy sees Martyn with four lives, with the ability to either a) bring Grian back to Yellow or b) offer a Yellow-Name in the alliance a life to keep them safe, and Martyn Doesn’t. This tells Jimmy that Martyn either doesn’t trust him or doesn’t value him enough to even attempt to protect him

I think this was even voiced a couple of times during LL, with Martyn closely guarding his lives and finding every reason he could to justify it (he was fully in the right for keeping them, even if doing so hurt others). Jimmy backed off, but there was just a small amount of bitterness that lingered

With Martyn, I think Jimmy picked up on the fact that Martyn was more concerned with protecting his Alliance than the people in it. He needed a group around him, but wasn’t terribly concerned with them otherwise

And that’s what fueled his decision to steal the life. If Martyn doesn’t respect him, if he doesn’t trust him, if he doesn’t care enough to protect him, why should Jimmy do the same. Why should he be a human shield for someone who barely looks his way. Impulse and Mumbo could stay if they wanted, but he wasn’t going to

Which makes it hurt so much more when Martyn asks to run away with him, when Martyn says he cares about Jimmy more than anyone else in the alliance. I want to remind you, Jimmy’s an optimist. He looks at the half-full cup. He doesn’t consider Martyn could be lying because he wanted so badly to just be Seen. So Jimmy gives it back

As it turns out, Martyn was lying. He calls him an idiot, and Jimmy is exiled immediately

All the resolve that Jimmy had in stealing the life crumbles then and there. He starts hanging around the Southlands alliance like a lost puppy, basically begging them to take him back. Martyn’s little ruse inadvertently showed Jimmy that, really, all he wanted is to be valued and supported. The life counts stops being an issue because he’s able to recognize the real issue- he feels undervalued and he feels stupid

That’s a factor even after the Southlands reunites, after he’s almost unanimously voted back in but Grian’s insistent on a recount. I think it’s the main reason why he’s so risky when he goes down to red- with him falling for a trap that he easily could have avoided

Again, it’s the same as 3L. He feels disrespected and undervalued so he takes unnecessary risks in order to prove to himself and to others that he’s just as strong, just as smart, and just as capable as they are.

This is later coupled with Mumbo’s extreme bloodlust when he turns Red. On Red, Mumbo was needlessly violent and is basically the only Red to swing at anything that moved. And I do mean Needlessly violent, he got himself and others into several dicey scenarios because he was impulsive and wanted to Stab. He gave the server a reason to be cautious of Mumbo and any other Red-Name. If Mumbo was a loose cannon, how would others be?

Except Mumbo was only aggressive towards Non-Reds (obviously) and was otherwise supportive of those on his side

I think this actually greatly influenced Skizz’s decision to leave BEST behind, with him seeing Mumbo as someone worth defending/standing by. Not only was he a visibly strong ally with a reputation, he genuinely cared for and supported those who were at his side. In Skizz’s case, he offered a source of stability where BEST couldn’t, and I think the same is true for Jimmy.

Jimmy sees this, and sees Mumbo as someone who can both show him how to be dangerous and respect his abilities in this game. Mumbo was respected as a threat and genuinely cared for those in his company. So he’s the perfect ally, right?

Actually, no, and this isn’t where the Skizz comparison ends either. Remember, Mumbo created the reputation that Reds are a worthy threat and that they’re violent without cause (“oh but what about Joel?” Joel was a joke at best and an annoyance at worst. He I think he definitely did influence Mumbo’s actions but that’s another essay entirely). Mumbo influenced Skizz’s aggression this season, with him becoming more bold in who he threatened or even attacked

So how does this compare to Jimmy? Both of them were coming off of alliances where they were unsupported, so they leaned more into Mumbo’s habits- good and bad. Except they didn’t really see it. Good traits were associated with Mumbo, their friend, and bad traits were associated with their shared condition, their Red-Life.

The plan to trap the bunker played on both, but was coupled with Jimmy’s bad habit of shooting for the best possible outcome. Mumbo had previously turned tail and ran whenever a plan went south, but that’s not how Jimmy is. Jimmy only focuses on the possible gain and ignores possible dangers. When the trap didn’t set off, he insisted on pushing Grian into it. And that actually goes back to him trying to chase Ren’s army- he didn’t know when to call it quits

And of course this causes both of their deaths. To Jimmy, his death caused Mumbo’s. He caused the death of the one ally who actually stood by him. I think this is when he fully internalizes criticism from 3L and LL as a whole. He feels weak, he feels stupid, he doesn’t feel nearly as capable as those around him.

And this carries into DL

Except DL was a much different season than the previous two. The soulmate mechanic in DL meant that you and your ally have to rely on each other, you have to support each other because failing to do so will surely spell your doom

Not only that, but Jimmy was finally paired with a supportive ally from the start. They made their base together because they trusted the other to build more than they trusted themself. When Jimmy came back with cows, Tango’s immediate response was to exclaim “you’re amazing!!!” Instead of criticizing him like previous alliances had- even back in 3L!! This is the first time Jimmy got a fully positive response to his efforts. Tango was overwhelmingly supportive towards Jimmy and Jimmy returned the favor. The base didn’t look perfect, but it was theirs. The server didn’t want them to have a horn so they devised a plan to get one.

Tango had also been following a similar arc up until now- with him being undervalued by his alliances. Except in those alliances, he was pushed to the side or physically harmed instead of being an object of ridicule. I think this is part of why it isn’t really out of place for them to meet through dying. Tango was expecting to be harmed and so was Jimmy, so neither of them blame the other

With Tango being pushed to the side, he also shied away from leadership positions, finding it more comfortable to follow. This paired well with how Jimmy typically takes charge of things, with Jimmy making most plans for the both of them (most, not all)

But again, this is where things get messy

Remember, Jimmy uses risks to prove his worth. He wants to see what he can do, but is also still recovering from previous seasons. He still thinks he’s the reason why him and Mumbo died, and doesn’t want to cause the death another ally, especially one who loves him. Instead of staying careful, he devises a plan to steal livestock, to steal Scar’s horse. It’s for the ranch, it’s for Tango

I think Jimmy realizes the problem when the Ranch is burned. He’s forced to confront this when he sees Tango fly into a rage and almost try to fight a group of people he’d surely lose to. Jimmy cannot be reckless here, he has to talk Tango down from the proverbial ledge.

With this, the roles end up reversing, with Tango being the reckless one and Jimmy trying to steer him to be more tactical. And Jimmy is So careful about this too, not wanting to act like Scott or the Southlands. Because of that he never actually tells Tango no on his dangerous plans- ESPECIALLY the plan to release Rancher’s Revenge, the warden- but instead suggests ways to make the plan better

The dilemma here is that Jimmy needs to choose between being risky and being safe. Both would benefit Tango, except Jimmy knows from experience how much it hurts to be bound in bubble-wrap all the time

Jimmy sees no way to avoid risks without hurting Tango. So instead of fighting against that part of himself, Jimmy leans into it. He accepts it as a key tenet of his identity, even as it puts the both of them in harms way. Yes they went down in the end, but they went down together, Always Together.

It didn’t matter if Jimmy was a “worthy” ally, he didn’t need to be Smart, he didn’t need to be Strong, he didn’t even need to be Capable. He learned that he deserved love not in spite of his flaws, but alongside his flaws.

And this is the lesson he carries into the next two Seasons, with both alliances being fully centered on being reckless

The Bad Boys acted dangerously, but they acted as a unit- ESPECIALLY him and Joel. Bad Boys dig straight down, Bad Boys water bucket clutch from the build limit, Bad Boys care about each other not in spite of endangering themselves, but because of it

And this is because Joel had a nearly identical arc. Joel in previous seasons had a habit of acting recklessly in the same way Jimmy did, and was cast aside because of it. In 3L he ended up a Lone Wolf, in LL he was forced into a position where he’s the villain, and in DL he and Etho leaned into the danger in the same way Jimmy and Tango did. Their stories run parallel so it only makes sense that they’re the ones who end up supporting each other in LimL

And Joel was Jimmy’s main source of support that season, with Grian representing the criticism of previous seasons. This gave Jimmy the ability to confront said criticisms through, again, leaning into them. He did something stupid? Yes, but him and Joel were having fun. A plan went south because of unnecessary risks? Yes, but Joel was being risky with him. Joel gave Jimmy the ability to basically cut through the aforementioned “bubble wrap” Grian was trying to put around them

And I think it’s also important to mention Grian did this out of both love and cowardice, not malice. Ultimately he didn’t want to lose either of them and was trying to keep them alive longer. But because Grian never learned the lesson they did- that it’s more important to act together than to survive alone- Grian chooses survival and ends up alone.

Anyways, recklessness being the foundation of Jimmy’s alliances carries into SL as well

Jimmy was on the brink of death for almost the entire season, man was not thriving whatsoever and that was known. Funnily enough, he ends up with Martyn, who again was previously more concerned with his own safety than the people around him

But Martyn is just coming off of a victory, of finally achieving the very thing he’d been working towards and the thing he centered his motivations on. Without that goal, he’s left with his methods- which was mostly having dangerous ideas and seeing them through

With Jimmy, Martyn introduced plans that involved them being risky and in everyone else’s faces. This, to Jimmy, echoed both Joel and Tango’s behavior. He was able to fully settle into the fact that, for him, good things come from being reckless, from shooting for the best possible outcome and refusing to back down

Jimmy maintains his optimism and his recklessness, traits that had previously been challenged but traits he stubbornly holds onto and values in his Life

#someone pointed out that the only psychoanalyses of this man are abt the curse #and I might be making an amv specifically About The Curse but goddamnit I can’t let him be done dirty like this #will actually write the essay so if you come back to this and there’s a wall of text that’s why #edit essay is written #trafficblr #jimmy solidarity #traffic smp #grian #scott smajor #mumbo jumbo #skizzleman #martyn inthelittlewood #tango tek #if you want the canary curse tie in-#it greatly factors into the image of him being weak and lacking value #that’s why he fights so hard against it #he needs to prove that he has value and he needs to prove that he isn’t worthless because of his shortcomings #long post

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arcadiabaytornado · 1 month

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This aspect of the Amberprice relationship fascinates me so much because how much did Rachel hide, and how much did Chloe refuse to see?

Did Rachel put on a sweet smile and lie that she was heading home when she was really going to hang out with friends that Chloe wouldn’t like? Or did Rachel tell the truth knowing that Chloe would make up a narrative in her head? Did Rachel admit to hanging out with characters that Chloe wouldn’t like, only to be met with the thought process of: “Well, she would never really enjoy hanging out with those people. She probably just wants her photo taken.”

The game very much says that both are true, but we don’t have the finer details. For example: Chloe says that Rachel lied to her about Frank, though we don’t know what the lie was or the maginitude of the lie. Did Rachel tell Chloe that she wasn’t romantically involved with Frank and she was crazy for even thinking so? Or did Rachel say that she was “just” flirting with him, and Chloe downplayed what that meant because she couldn’t face the idea that Rachel was moving on without her?

It’s so interesting to think about because we only see Chloe’s side of the story. She feels like Rachel deceived her, and we know that’s true because of the junkyard letter where Rachel blatantly says that she’s keeping her “romance” with Mark a secret. However, I do sometimes wonder how much Chloe refused to see what was right in front of her, especially because her first reaction to Rachel and Frank was to go into denial and justify it to herself.

This is one aspect of Amberprice I think about all the time because, while Rachel clearly wasn’t a 100% honest person, Chloe was clearly turning a blind eye to things as well. I think “How much did Rachel lie about, and how much was obvious but Chloe either downplayed or chose not to pay attention to?” is a genuine question because the answer majorly changes things about their dynamic. Personally, I imagine it as a bit of a 50/50 split, but that answer isn’t set in stone.

#I'm thinking about comic Rachel casually telling Chloe that she's going to see Frank and having a lot of thoughts about it #Rachel Amber #Chloe Price #LIS #life is strange #before the storm

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yunjardi · 11 months

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𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐡𝐮𝐬𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐝!𝐣𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐱 𝐰𝐢𝐟𝐞!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: 𝐬𝐦𝐮𝐭 [𝐦𝐝𝐧𝐢], 𝐟𝐥𝐮𝐟𝐟, 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐟𝐨𝐨𝐝, 𝐣𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐛𝐢𝐭 𝐬𝐮𝐛𝐛𝐲 🫠🤍, 𝐮𝐧𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐬𝐞𝐱 [𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐮𝐧𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐚 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐟𝐲 𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞], 𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐩𝐞𝐭 𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐬 𝐬𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐚𝐬 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲 & 𝐩𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐲, 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐣𝐨𝐛, 𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐥, 𝐩𝐥𝐬 𝐥𝐦𝐤 𝐢𝐟 𝐢 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 :)

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people always told you that you lived your life backwards:

"aren't you supposed to be the one to stay home?" they'd say to which you'd respond with a confused shrug.

it's not that you particularly cared about what their opinion was on you and jake's lifestyle, it was more of how they'd talk about jake that bothered you. people who found out that you were the breadwinner between you and jake would always have a snide remark to say regarding jake's role in the relationship.

"he's not a real man if he makes his wife work her ass off."

"he must be lazy."

"you should find a husband who does real work."

or maybe even as far as saying that they'd help you 'escape' your "horrible" home situation.

but regardless of people's comments, you still continued to live your life the same because everything they said was wrong. completely wrong.

you love jake with all your heart and then some. the best part of your day is coming home from an exhausting workday to see jake cooking, baking, or maybe even preparing to take you out on a date by laying out some of your freshly washed clothes for you to change into. jake is the best husband a girl could ever ask for. he's practically perfect, and you absolutely hated that people downplayed how hard jake worked even though they have no idea what he does on a daily basis.

because of him, you always had delicious lunch to take to work.

because of him, the house was always neat and tidy.

because of him, the fridge was always stocked with groceries.

if there's anything to conclude from all of this, it would be that you love your husband and appreciate every little thing he does.

...

you took off your high heels, leaving them at the lowered part of the floor where the front door is as you stepped up onto the elevated part of the floor. you slipped on the pair of soft house shoes that jake had handmade for you recently; they made you feel warm and fuzzy inside whenever you put them on because you knew that jake put a lot of love and effort into making them. he even went so far as to embroider your name on the back part of the slippers, which you found to be a sweet and thoughtful touch to the already meticulously crafted footwear.

upon hearing the door open, jake took off the, also handmade, apron that he had on so that he could go and greet you without transfering anything onto your clothes that may have been on his apron.

you immediately pulled him into a tight hug after giving him a sweet and much-needed kiss after your stressful day.

"i missed you so much, baby," jake smiled into the kiss, "go relax for a bit, okay? anything specific you want for dinner?" you shook your head as you pulled jake back over to you, not ready for him to leave your side. he couldn't help but smile warmly at the feeling of your head against his chest. "don't go yet," you pouted, "i want you to lay with me." jake nodded in response before scooping you up and taking you over to the couch, causing you to yelp in shock before starting to giggle.

"much better," you sighed with content as you and jake cuddled up next to each other, "i just wanted to let you know that i was thinking about you all day long." you confessed, running your fingers through his hair. "thinking about me?" jake cocked his head like a confused puppy, "what do you mean, love?"

you couldn't help but chuckle at how innocent jake sounded. "i meant that i was thinking about you like that, you know what i mean?" jake's eyes widened when he realized the context, his face becoming red and shy at the thought of you being needy for him while you were supposed to be focusing on your work. "i was thinking about you, too," jake admitted shyly, "i wanted you so bad. i still want you so bad, baby." you felt something stiffening beside your thigh which caused you to move over and straddle him the way you habitually did when he was beginning to grow hard.

you pressed your hips down onto his, the feeling of his clothed hard causing your core to heat up. moving to the side, you discarded your shirt and bottoms onto the floor, leaving only your bra and panties on display for your sweet househusband. he let out a little whimper followed by a soft, low moan at the sight of your pretty body showcased for him and him only.

"so pretty," jake breathed out, adoring every inch of your body, "i need touch you." you gave him a bashful smile before guiding his hands down your hips. "i'm all yours, my love," you voiced with passion, "play with me as much as you want." jake's soft eyes widened yet again as his cock throbbed in his boxers, eager to fulfill his and your desires.

jake took it upon himself to take his shirt off, revealing his sexy, toned torso. after all, if jake wasn't scurrying around the house cooking or cleaning, he was working out. you settled your eyes on him as he gently kneaded your ass which caused waves of pleasure to travel all throughout the bottom half of your body. at this point, you could feel yourself becoming wetter by the second, becoming needier and needier for him.

"jake, please," you pleaded, "i need you so bad." jake couldn't help but become shy at you begging for him to fuck you. he always gets nervous when it comes to sex despite how many times you two have done it. you always wondered why jake was so shy about having sex considering how phenomenal he was at it without realizing.

"don't be scared, puppy. you always make me feel so good," you reassured him, your love for him deeply touching his heart, "fuck, i want you so bad, jakey." his puppy eyes lit up at your statement, now motivated to please you to the max. "i'm gonna take these off, okay?" jake asked sweetly as he tugged on the waistband of your panties. you nodded, lifting your legs a bit to make it easier for him to discard of the garment as quickly as possible. "your turn," you smirked, shifting your body off of his. you toyed with the buttons of his pants before fully unbuttoning them, revealing how restraining his boxers had become. you were practically drooling at the sight of his entire body on display for you. taking one last glance at his sexy v-line, you fully undressed him, his thick length springing out from inside his boxers. you let out a quiet squeak at how impressive his dick was as if you hadn't seen it a billion times already. "it got so big for me, didn't it?" you teased before placing a gentle kiss on his throbbing tip. "mhm, all for y-you," jake sputtered out amidst the pleasure that you made run down his entire body, "i'm all yours, baby." jake seemed to sound more confident than before which made you smile internally, glad that he was just as eager as you.

you let your spit hit his cock before beginning to stroke it with your small hand. jake bit down on his lower lip as he let out little whines of pleasure.

"is it good, baby?" you asked, wanting to check his comfort level. jake nodded frantically, showing you that he wants you to continue. you couldn't help but smirk slightly as you put your mouth on his cock, not forgetting to play with his balls as you sucked him off. jake was letting out moans left and right as you alternated between swirling your tongue around his precum-leaking tip and jerking him off. "fuck, you make me feel so good," jake breathed out, running his fingers through your hair, "i need to be inside you." you moaned against his length one last time before pulling your mouth away and positioning yourself above him, waiting to sink down on his throbbing cock.

guiding your hips down, jake's tip passed through your entrance as you let out a shy moan at the sensation. "s-so big," you mewled out once he completely bottomed out, "mmm, i need to cum so bad." you whined needily, urging jake to begin thrusting into you from below. your moans and whines motivated jake to go a little rougher, wanting so badly to make you feel good.

as he slowed down, you took it upon yourself to roll your hips against his while running your hands down his toned abdomen. jake was having a fun time watching you fuck yourself on his dick and moan his name, more than happy to see (and hear) how pleased you were. to your surprise, he gently rolled you onto your elbows and knees to fuck you from behind, and it turned you on to the max to know that he was gaining more confidence in the bedroom, having no problem with him taking over.

slowly, jake teased your wet pussy with his thick tip before sliding himself in. you gripped onto the duvet as you bit down on your lip while jake's head fell back in pleasure as he began to thrust in and out of your tight cunt.

"oh, fuck," you moaned out loud, "jake, that feels so fucking good." whines, whimpers, and words of praise helplessly fell from your lips at the pure pleasure you were being given from behind. jake was squeezing your ass while watching it bounce against his abs every single time your met his thrusts in the middle. "you're so tight and wet, baby," jake groaned, "are you close? do you want me to make you cum?" you whimpered in response as you eagerly arched your back more for him. he took that response and ran with it, thrusting deeper into your pussy and basking in the sensation of your walls pulsing. it didn't take too long for your orgasm to wash over your whole body, your cum shamelessly dripping down his shaft. the sight of your cum coating his dick sent him into a frenzy, pulling his cock out of you to cum all over your pretty ass in warm spurts before gathering some onto his tip to fuck back into you. "your cum feels so good, baby," you breathed out one last time before jake fully pulled himself out, now feeling a bit tired.

"i'm sorry," he said with puppy-dog eyes, "did i go too hard, baby?" you couldn't help but gush at his adorable face as you planted a kiss on his nose. "don't be sorry, my love," you reassured him with another kiss, "it felt so good, i promise." jake looked relieved to hear that it didn't hurt you.

"good," he smiled warmly as he wrapped his arms around you, "can i cook dinner for you now?" you giggled with a nod, knowing that his househusband tendencies were starting to kick in.

----------------------------

a/n: a gift just for you <3 i hope you enjoyed reading and stick around for more series updates and oneshots coming soon :)

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chvoswxtch · 5 days

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Hi Court,

May I please have an Americano made by Aaron Hotchner based on this movie quote:

"In my opinion, the best thing you can do is find someone who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you." —Juno

Thanks and Congrats!

juno is one of those movies I can rewatch a million times & never get tired of & I love this quote so much

thank you so much! enjoy!

blurb below the cut

order for aaron with a shot of juno

the best thing you can do is find someone who loves you for exactly what you are

Getting caught by your boss sobbing in a supply closet at seven-thirty in the morning was not on your agenda for today, or any other day for that matter, but when that door swung open, it was clear you were both caught by surprise. Hotch took one look at your red-rimmed eyes, and the semi-permanent frown he always wore melted into something a little softer, with a hint of awkwardness. Attempting to do damage control and not look like a complete basket case, you swiftly wiped at your eyes and cheeks with the sleeve of your sweater and cleared your throat.

“Sorry…I uh…allergies. Really bad this morning.”

Hotch arched one of his thick brows as he spoke in a dry tone.

“You do remember that I’m a profiler, right? Part of my job is to know when people are lying to me.”

Letting out a deep sigh, you gave a dismissive wave of your hand and leaned back against one of the shelves, crossing your arms over your chest while diverting your embarrassed gaze down to the floor.

“It’s…really not a big deal.”

“It is if it’s bothering you.”

It never failed to surprise you when Hotch displayed warmth and compassion considering you were used to his stoic and authoritative nature. Glancing down at the watch on his wrist just for a moment, he reached inside the supply closet to switch on the light before stepping inside, shutting the door and leaning back against the shelf opposite you.

“We’ve got ten minutes before briefing. Talk to me.”

“Hotch, it really isn’t-”

“Stop downplaying your feelings. You’re upset for a reason. What is it?”

The last thing you wanted to do was talk about your relationship problems with your boss, but you had to remind yourself that he was more than that. He was also your friend, who could potentially offer a logical and unbiased perspective, but at the very least, he was giving you a chance to vent.

“Do you ever feel like…like no matter how hard you try in a relationship, you’re still going to get left?”

“Did you forget I’m divorced?”

There was a faint hint of humor in Hotch’s voice, and you noticed the slight quirk at the edge of his lips. Trying to suppress a smile, you were delightfully surprised when he offered you a small one and mirrored your stance of crossing his arms over his chest, nodding in your direction.

“Look, if you feel like you’re doing everything you can, then you can’t blame yourself for another person’s choices. Sometimes you give it your best, and it’s not enough. But that doesn’t make it your fault if it doesn’t work out. Effort goes both ways.”

Letting your head fall back against the shelf, you sighed deeply. Part of you knew Hotch was right, but another part of you still felt like there was something wrong with you, or something you just couldn’t get right. Meeting his gaze, a sad smile appeared on your lips.

“And what if my best is never enough?”

There was a pensive expression on Hotch’s face, and he was quiet for a minute. His head was slightly tilted to the side, a mannerism you’d learned meant he was really listening. Hotch still had his arms folded over his chest, and he gave a light shrug of his broad shoulders.

“If you want my opinion, the best thing you can do is find a person who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you. The right person will still think the sun shines out of your ass. That’s the kind of person that’s worth sticking with.”

A laugh tumbled from your lips suddenly at his raw sentiment, and Hotch seemed pleased with himself that he’d gotten you to smile. Glancing down at his watch again, he looked up at you with a more sympathetic gaze and offered you a light smile before reaching out with his right hand to give your shoulder a light squeeze.

“We’ve got two minutes. Take a second and gather yourself, and then meet us in the conference room when you’re ready.”

As he opened the door and stepped out, you called out his name.

“Hotch?”

Abruptly he paused, his hand still on the doorknob, turning to look at you inquisitively.

“Yeah?”

A gracious smile covered your lips as you nodded at him.

“Thank you.”

Hotch returned your nod with his own, a fleeting light smile crossing his lips.

“Anytime.”

#court's 4k followers celebration #court's 4k friends celebration #court's cafe #aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner x reader #aaron hotchner x you #aaron hotchner blurb #aaron hotchner request #criminal minds #criminal minds blurb #criminal minds request

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seasidepierre · 8 months

Note

how about tink and charles blurb about the bee hotels - i feel like seb would be grinning so much about it all and tink would be filming everything 🐰

If there was one thing Seb that missed about Formula 1, it probably was the way Charles was still hanging over every of your words and moves. You’d just be breathing and he’d be there, thinking you’re the absolute best at doing so. It was hilarious and endearing, reminding him of how much of a sap he was back then when he met his now wife and the mother of his children. He must have been just as bad. You had arrived in the team right at the same time as Charles, only a few months later. Same age as him, young and full of life, unable to sit still for more than fifteen minutes, but with an overflowing passion that felt like a tidal wave most of the time. It had been a huge pleasure for Seb to watch you come up with ideas for the Ferrari socials and growing into your job, that he still sometimes felt like you might have been too young to be thrown into that quickly. There had been that sense of protection that he couldn’t have ignored when it came to you and Charles, which truly had meant more to you two than he ever thought it would.

Needless to say, on the rare occasions Seb came back to the paddock after his retirement, he made sure to visit his two favourite people and tease them to no end about their change of relationship status that he called for since they met, pretty much.

So in Japan, when an invitation was issued to the Ferrari lineup and com team to decorate and inaugurate the buzzing corner, you were sure to be up for more teasing, which didn’t wait too much to arrive because as soon as Seb saw you, he was on it.

“Tink!” He yelled at you, sweeping you in his arms to squeeze the life out of you. “How are you doing, little fairy?” “I’m doing amazing,” you giggled. “How are the kids?” “They’re doing great! Look, the girls made me bracelets!”

Seb proudly showed off the black and yellow bracelets branded with letter beads that spelled “Papa” which made you grin even bigger.

“Where’s your shadow? Peter Pan is still looking for it?” Seb smiled. “He’s coming, you know how he is with his hair when it’s not exactly like he wants it to be.” “Heh, he has to be handsome for you,” Seb shrugged, a teasing grin on his lips. “He doesn’t need anymore, he’s already secured the deal, we’ve signed a new contract just a few months ago,” you joked.

Charles made it just in time for the small drive around that Seb had organised, so he could proudly show the work he had done for his little buzzing corner. The bee hotels looked incredible and if you trusted the whole installation around, you knew you were up for a good time to inaugurate this new and special place. You took heaps of photos and videos of the Ferrari boys painting their canvas and bee hotel, made sure you had plenty of content to post and finally, finally, came to a stop when Seb came by to check on Ferrari’s bee hotel.

“You guys did a pretty good job,” he smiled at Charles. “Heh, we tried our best,” he blushed. “I feel like you had an advantage, because you had literal Tinkerbell to help you out,” he smirked and grabbed you for a quick side hug. “I barely did anything.”

Charles grinned at you, in that very Charles way he had when he looked at you and Seb couldn’t help laughing at him a little. It had always been so obvious, it shouldn’t have taken that long for the two of you to finally get it together.

“You do realise I made that happen,” Seb proudly announced, grabbing Charles on his other side. “You did not,” Charles huffed. “I didn’t lose so many challenges on purpose for you to look good to her, just so you could downplay it three years later.” “I beat you fair and square!” Charles gasped. “Nah, you won because I knew it’d mean Tink here would look at you like you were a champion,” the former racer admitted. “I also may have dropped so many hints that she actually liked you back, I’m surprised it took you so much time to finally understand!” “You didn’t know,” it was your turn to huff and blush. “I knew from the moment you two met.” “I call bullshit!” “Call it as you wish, but I knew,” Seb laughed. “Jokes aside.. I’m really happy for you two, you know?” “We know,” you smiled, dropping your head against Seb’s shoulder. “Thanks for taking care of us for that long.” “My pleasure.. Now.. Who’s gonna tell me why that prancing horse looks so ugly?” “Charles doesn’t know how to use a stamp.” “You said you wouldn’t tell anyone!” Charles yelled with indignation.

An hour later, the entire world knew, because the video was posted on Instagram, with a caption full of bee puns and with a picture of Seb and Charles together, of course.

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akimojo · 18 days

Text

i don't mind seeing people interpret hope and lightning as having romantic connotations surrounding them in the lr lore, but i personally think claiming it to be proven as canon really undermines just how badly bhunivelze fucked with hope's head

"bhunivelze developed a romantic obsession with lightning because he absorbed hope's heart!" yes, but that's not all there is to it. you gotta keep in mind that bhunivelze used lightning to psychologically mess with hope for centuries, he used her image as a tool to get hope to obsess over the past and wish for nothing more than to be reunited with her (remember that the last time hope ever saw her was at the end of xiii, while everyone else aside from vanille and fang had come back at that point), and she had such a major hand in inspiring hope to become the person, the leader, he'd become since then

bhunivelze didn't inherit hope's emotions until after he had become obsessed with lightning as a symbol of the past. if you view hope's and lightning's relationship as platonic/familial (like i personally do) then bhunivelze becomes so much more sick, and it adds to the misogynistic undertones in his behavior toward mwynn and etro, his own family. he took something pure, the admiration a young boy had for an older woman who replaced his mom as his female role model, and twisted it into something dark, inappropriate and obsessive, something that would serve him. that's what he inherited. he was never able to love his mother or daughter, how could he possibly understand the familial love between hope and lightning?

bhunivelze's sudden feelings for lightning is, in my opinion, meant to disturb us because of how innocent hope's admiration for lightning actually is. turning hope back into a kid sells that even more, it specifically draws out lightning's maternal instincts toward him, just for her to be faced with what bhunivelze has twisted it into after centuries of torture. bhunivelze isn't representative of hope's and lightning's relationship, they're victims of his abuse of the human heart

again, interpreting them as romantic is fine and dandy if that's how you see them, but i feel like claiming it's all "proof that hope x lightning is canon" ignores a lot of important details surrounding them and bhunivelze, more specifically it downplays the absolutely devastating impact bhunivelze had on hope's state of mind, and subsequently, lightning's rage upon seeing it for herself

#im not really into the ship at all so i could be just as biased lol but thats my take on it #i havent gotten into the last two books yet so who knows maybe im missing something big #buuuuut in terms of bhunivelzes obsession with lightning? i wouldnt use it as proof of anything #bhunivelze is a sick fuck and VERY unreliable if youre looking to use his behavior as evidence of anything romantic #especially when the main takeaway from his backstory is his cruelty and indifference toward the women in his life fghjgyjh #final fantasy xiii #lightning returns

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ishoulddefbedoingotherthings · 9 months

Text

I don’t like Neal.

(2nd installment of rants I should not be writing because I should def be doing other things)

Or in other words: The only bagel I’ll ever like is the New York style kind.

And it’s not even because I’m a CS shipper because when we first found out that Neal existed, Hook was in his womanizer mode (and yes I loved HIM but I didn’t ship CS quite yet, I did start immediately after tho, but that’s beside the point).

First, facts need to be pointed out. Emma was a minor. That’s not arguable, she was a minor and was 17 when she had Henry because she had just turned 28 when Henry was already 10, so there was an overlap when she was 17 and had a baby. So that means during her relationship with Neal, she was a minor.

According to Neal’s wanted poster, he was 23. A 23 year old with a 17 year old is not okay, and it’s logical to assume that Emma was 16 when she met him, but even then, NEAL WAS 22. THAT IS NOT OKAY. THAT IS IN NO WAY OKAY. And if we’re adding two hundred years to it, that’s even MORE not okay.

And I know there’s the argument that Hook is hundreds of years older too, but their age doesn’t matter, it’s their age in relation to EMMA’S. When Emma met Neal, she was 16/17. She was vulnerable and living on the streets and even if Neal wasn’t trying to, he took advantage of her naive state. All Emma wanted was a family, and Neal seemed to give that to her because she believed he was the first person to give a damn about her. When Emma met Hook, she was a mature adult and could properly assess a situation, a skill that she hadn’t yet mastered as a 16 year old. She literally couldn’t because our brains don’t fully develop until 25.

So that’s one thing. Neal took advantage of her. She was a minor, he was an adult. Any person that would condone that relationship AND SAY IT WAS HEALTHY is not okay in my book.

Again I repeat, the only bagel I like is that with cream cheese.

And now moving on: HE LEFT HER IN JAIL??? FOR HIS CRIME?????? WOMEN HAVE DIVORCED FOR LESS! MY MOTHER DIVORCED FOR LESS!

I feel like people brush past that way too easily. Because OUAT is a magical show people try to downplay trauma, but pregnancy is even traumatic for a woman that wanted the baby. Emma did not want to be pregnant. Nobody would want to be pregnant in that situation. She put her livelihood and her trust into Neal and he betrayed her all because of her so called “destiny”. Destiny is destiny. It would happen no matter what and he didn’t need to make her take the fall for his crime in order to get away from her. HE COULDVE CHEATED ON HER AND IT WOULDVE BEEN BETTER. And, he also didn’t want to see his father, which most definitely played a part in his decision to leave Emma. Neal suffered a lot because of his father, but if he loved Emma so much, it would’ve been worth it to stay with her, wouldn’t it??? Neal never chooses the hard path.

But back to the pregnancy thing. Not only is it traumatic for a fully grown woman, but she was a teenager!! A teenager that was alone and afraid in a jail cell, pregnant. That is terrible. That’s so astronomically terrible and I feel like people that love adult Neal don’t understand that. I love little Neal. Not adult Neal because he did that crap because Pinocchio told him to.

And if that wasn’t bad enough, he took the money for himself that was supposed to go to Emma. Imagine how much that would’ve helped her. Money can buy nice clothes and food and a hotel room. It could’ve gotten her a job (she did get one eventually) but that money could’ve helped her so much.

And then years later, when he gets the postcard that the curse is broken, he could’ve gone to check on her and he didn’t. Imagine how much that would’ve meant to Emma, that even after all he did, he was still willing to go back and see her because she meant that much to him. And he would be willing to face all the backlash she would give him because he knew he deserved it.

But he DIDNT. He didn’t come to check on her, he never would’ve gone to see her if not for Rumplestilskin’s deal, and that makes me hate him even more.

And uh HELLO? He also told her if he knew who she was he would’ve never gone near her. Imagine how much a punch in the gut that was for her. One of Emma’s main problems is that she felt like she was never enough for someone. And here Neal is, the first person she really loved and who she believed really loved her back, telling her that she would not be enough for him. She was not worthy of his attention because of where she was from and who she was. That is so terrible to say to someone. So very fricking terrible.

AND HE DIDNT EVEN APOLOGIZE. NOT ONCE. UM WTF? I REWATCHED AND HE DID NOT APOLOGIZE. He said he messed up. But he didn’t mess up, he fucked up. He fucked EMMA up. I am an Emma lover through and through. She is my baby and I will defend her to the ends of the earth. I don’t hate Neal because he ‘stood in the way of CS’ because let’s be honest, we all knew CS would be endgame when the first episode we got with them together was in direct contrast to Tallahassee, aka, Neal’s relationship with Emma. If that’s not foreshadowing I don’t know what is. No, I hate Neal because of how he treated EMMA. That poor innocent 17 year old that suffered so MUCH because of Neal’s actions, intentional or not.

I think the saying “it doesn’t matter if you mean well, it matters if you do well” completely sums up how I feel about that situation. Oh and even after he fucks her up, she goes to Tallahassee and waits for him FOR TWO YEARS because she’s hopeful that maybe it was a mistake, that he didn’t mean to leave her and that he still loved her. That little trooper. I want to give her blankets and hot chocolate and grilled cheese and therapy

There’s no doubt in my mind that Neal does love Emma because how can you not. She’s amazing. And I do believe that Emma loves Neal, but I think they were both in love with the idea of each other. They were each other’s first loves, and that is important, but have you noticed how surprised Neal looked when he learned all the new things about Emma? How he downplayed her superpower? How he didn’t believe her about Tamara when she was right? How he looked almost afraid and disgusted that she had magic? Magic that’s always been a part of her- that’s such a BIG part of her.

Neal loves Emma, but I think it’s startlingly clear that it’s not 28 year old Emma, but 17 carefree happy Emma. And Emma does love Neal, but I whole-heartedly feel like she loved the idea of him and how happy he used to make her before leaving her. And you know maybe I’m wrong, but the look Emma gives him a lot is only what I can describe as the look of a person trying to reminisce. A person trying to remember the good parts about someone after a decade of separation, and here they are a completely different person. I honestly don’t think Emma fully processed what Neal did to her, and that’s why all the feelings flooded to the surface upon seeing him after all those years because she never got closure.

And this actually happened to a friend of mine. He had broken up with his gf of a year, and he loved her a lot he just felt like it was toxic (and it was) and broke up, and then he dove into his work and didn’t think about it at all. Then work started to slow down a few months later and he had a lot of time to sit and think and he called me telling me that he missed his ex and that he wanted to get back together with her. I told him to wait a few weeks and process it to see how he felt before doing anything rash, and sure enough, a few weeks later he said that he didn’t want to get back together with her anymore.

Emma didn’t fully process that relationship for a decade. She hid behind walls and a red leather jacket because the pain was so intense. She told Neal she loved him in the portal because she thought he was going to die, but I really think she was talking to his past self, his past self that she loved and now she would never see that again. But at least now she could move on.

Then flash go echo cave. She literally tells Neal she wished he was dead. She said that she would always love him, but there’s a clear difference to loving someone than being in love with someone. Emma is not IN LOVE with Neal, she loves him, but she is not in love. And the reason for that is because all he put her through. All the pain and the torture that she didn’t want to go through again so she wished he was dead because it would’ve been easier for her to move on finally after all these years. I also thinks that she loved him because he gave her Henry. Emma loves her son. And Neal played a part in creating him so of course Emma would love him for giving her that, but she is not IN LOVE with him.

And I don’t blame Neal for wanting to fight for Emma (I would fight for Emma any day of the week) but I do think in that moment, and judging from her lack of reply, she knows that she is over with that romantic Neal titled chapter of her life.

(and it definitely didnt help that she got the daylights kissed out of her by a sexy pirate)

There are only two things that I respect about adult Neal.

1: he sent the dove to Captain Hook to get Emma back because he knew that he would fight to bring her home. I think that that is very admirable considering he act like a jealous asshole in neverland which really bugged me, and I thought it did develop his character well. He realized that Hook was not the same man he previously knew and I respect that.

2: the quote “I just want you to be happy, even if it’s not with me.” This is important to me because I feel like the writers could’ve portrayed him even further as a selfish person that he did appear to be (and that would’ve made it even easier for me to dislike him) but they didn’t. This was Neal recognizing that Emma moved on, something that she had been doing since Neverland, and commenting on that which I also admire because Emma deserves to be happy without something holding her down.

And honestly I do feel as if the only way she could move on entirely is through him dying because he would always be around, and she would always have that reminder of the most painful part of her life. I think JMO actually commented on that in an interview about how Neal would always be there because he was Henry’s father. And I think that even though Emma loved him, she felt a lot lighter once he died. I feel as if most of her grief was out of empathy for her son because he would have to live without a father just like she did, and she knew how painful that is. That grief was NOT because she would never get to be in a relationship with him because she had already moved on, and the people that can’t see that have not been watching the show, or are too much of a swanfire Stan to see that. And that’s perfectly fine, we’re all free to have an opinion, but Emma’s actions and words clearly showed that she moved on.

And you know, I deeply hated when he told Emma not to go after Hook because it was dangerous because I think it clearly showed the contrast between Emma and Neal and why they would not work out. Emma takes the hard way, Neal takes the easy way. Would it have been safer and easier for Emma to mourn Hook and move on? Yes. Was it more dangerous to go after him to right the wrong and injustice he faced, and to get her literal true love back? Yes, but it was the right choice. But every time Neal is confronted with a difficult choice, he takes the easy path. He could’ve stayed with Emma, he could’ve gone to her after the curse broke, and he could’ve offered a better damn date option than a ‘come to granny’s if you want’ which I can see how that would be respectful, but he also wasn’t fighting for her which is exactly what Emma needed someone to do for her. To climb past her walls and pull her out with them. That’s why I don’t like Neal. He did not treat Emma well, one way or another, his actions traumatized her and again, are you telling me you’d get back together with a person that did that to you? No? Well then why the hell should EMMA? Give the poor thing a break and let her move on.

(Also side note, am I the only one that thinks the ice cave in season four was a metaphor for Emma’s walls? Uhh hello? Impenetrable fortress? Turns a person cold and solid? Surviving not living? You couldn’t force them open with brute force (gold’s magic) because that may damage the person inside of them beyond repair, instead you need to encourage them to come out by themself while you simultaneously break it down so it makes the passage easier, and on the other side there is comfort and warmth. In season four Emma’s walls finally started to come down through her family and Killian and it’s literally shown through that episode. End of side note)

But yeah, I don’t like Neal, really deeply don’t. There are two things that I respect, and that’s it. And I didn’t even get to how he told Emma to lie to Rumple, knowing exactly what he does to liars, and how he was mad at Emma for not telling him about Henry when he left her in prison, and how he moved on way too fast from his FIANCÉ? Yeah she was evil but where were his residual feelings??? Even Emma had a bit with Walsh.

*big breath*

Thank you for coming to my second Ted Talk.

#once upon a time #captain swan #Anti Neal #Sorry not sorry #little Neal is so cute but adult Neal is a red flag and reminds me too much of my own crappy dad for me to ever like him #I feel like people that really like him have never had a man (or person in general) in their life that acts condescending and doesn’t #Believe in them. Neal didn’t believe in Emma as much as he should have in Neverland and he also didn’t believe her about Henry HER SON????#I said what I said #Emma swan meta #Rant #I love Emma Swan #I do not like Neal

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utilitycaster · 2 months

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7 and 8 for veth and/or essek?

7. For Veth, I like a lot of art of her as a halfling. I feel like people capture her style and her body type really well, and while this is outside the scope of this question I have a lot of complicated negative feelings about how fandom often headcanons in fully fanon representation to characters they don't actually care about, and so it's wonderful to have a canon fat character who is very happy with who she is and who people like for that.

For Essek, I think there's so much fanwork out there that it's possible to find something you like but I specifically like a lot of the meta about his motivations and his arc, and I like fic about his and Caleb's relationship that engages with it being a long-distance thing that won't be lifelong for Essek but will be significant.

8. For Veth: a bunch of things but notably, anyone who is like "I liked her better as a goblin" is boring and can fuck off; that is her core story. You do not like Veth if this is your opinion; you just want a goblin character to project onto. Also people who downplayed her relationship with Caleb. Many people who shipped Caleb with other party members (probably some people who shipped him with Essek too, but I saw this far more with those who shipped him with one of the tieflings) often attempted to downplay how much Veth meant to him. This keeps coming up, but if the core tenet of a ship involves low-key isolating the characters from any other meaningful relationships in your fanon conception of the show, it is a bad sign. Cody Christian was right and should be meaner to shippers.

For Essek: I cannot stand when fans constantly whine about him not appearing in materials or one-shots with the Nein. Yes, he is a member. He also did not appear until a third into the campaign and did not join them until very late in the campaign. He is on the run, in disguise. He is an NPC. The way he exists within the actual play story is fundamentally different. Also, he doesn't physically appear in Echoes of the Solstice but the plot hinges on him and others have written brilliantly about how screentime=/= importance. And I generally hate shrieking "HOW CAN I EXIST WITHOUT BLORBO/HOW CAN I WAIT FOR NEW EPISODES/WHEN WILL I GET NEWS OF SHOW" posts anyway and frequently block people who do them constantly and boy have I blocked no shortage of Essek fans for this specifically.

#answered #Anonymous #cr tag #character ask meme

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bluedalahorse · 6 months

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Public perceptions of Sara as a neurodivergent in love

As far as Sara’s romance arc goes in Young Royals, something I’ve thought a lot about is how there’s this ableist tendency to infantilize autistic people, and part of this ableist infantilization comes down to downplaying or ignoring or erasing autistic people’s sexualities. Luckily, there’s more shows recently that have pushed back against that in some form—Everything’s Gonna Be Okay and Heartbreak High being among them. (Everything’s Gonna Be Okay even has an ace autistic character to nuance things all the more.) Young Royals first and foremost pushes back by giving Sara a love story in her own right, full of as many ups and downs and complex turns of character that Wille and Simon’s relationship does.

There’s a second thing that I think might be going on, and it’s subtle enough to me that I want to see how season 3 plays out before I can say “this is for sure a thing that’s happening in the show.” And that is the way that other characters respond to Sara’s potential for romantic and sexual attraction, whether they’re downplaying it or actually seeing the reality of it. Now, Sara’s Manor House pals at least acknowledge her potential to feel attraction and be in a relationship, and that’s good, but it feels sort of… abstract? And while Sara does lack the experience the other girls have, they tend to presume a level of innocence and naïveté on her part that doesn’t quite match up with Sara’s more complicated reality. (Also, this may just be my bias speaking, but Fredrika’s comment about Sara’s virginity particularly grates on me. Fredrika plays it off as a compliment but I don’t think it’s meant to be kind.) Meanwhile, when it comes to Sara’s interactions with Simon, we see her teasing him about boys and boyfriends, but he doesn’t seem to respond to her in the same way. Not out of malicious intent I don’t think, but it was something I noticed in their interaction.

It also strikes me that Sara and August were in a secret relationship all season 2 and as far as we know so far, no one noticed. Neither of them is very subtle in how they’re texting the other one and they’re both always sneaking off “to go get a textbook” or whatever. Boys have walked by Sara as she’s walked through the halls of Forest Ridge dormitory. It wouldn’t be that hard to figure out! Felice lives with Sara and doesn’t suspect secret boyfriends or anything. I’m curious to see what the Hillerska rumor mill is like in season 3—whether anyone did pick up on the little sargust tryst like they did the wilmon one, or whether Hillerska students failed to notice because they don’t see Sara as being inherently connected to romance as someone like say, Felice is. Naturally Sara’s class background and gender play a role in that as well, but identities always interact and we can’t leave neurodivergence out of the equation.

We talk a lot about how Sara’s neurodivergence impacted the way she got into a relationship, mostly in terms of how her neurodivergent traits impact her sense of morality and the way she reads certain social signals. What I haven’t seen people talk about as much is how other people in her life perceive her neurodivergence and her capacity for romantic and/or sexual relationships. I’m curious, too, to know how intentionally the show is addressing this. As season 3 deals with the fallout of season 2, I wonder to what extent other characters might try to pigeonhole Sara as childlike or not in full understanding of her own feelings, as they try to make sense of what happened with Sara and August. And I wonder to what extent Sara will have to fight back and claim her own agency in relation to these feelings, even as she’s left this relationship behind.

What do you all think?

#young royals #sara eriksson #some half formed ideas I’ve been thinking about for a while #there is probably more to add but I’m leaving this as is for now

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becauseicantthinkwritings · 2 years

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For Richer or Poorer

Part 5 of my Accidentally on Purpose Series!

Warnings: Smut (18+), toxic relationships, office sex, mentions of consensual somnophilia, pictures taken during somnophilic acts (also consensual), cheating accusations, attempts at humiliation, masturbation, talks of Billy's past attempted assault, mentions of murder, cunilingus, a sprinkle of sub!Billy.

This is completely dedicated to my love, @idaofinfinity who celebrated her birthday this weekend. Happy birthday baby, I'm so glad I met you ❤❤

Photo credits

It's been a month since you started working at Anvil, you've been learning the history of the company's charity donations in that time, and brushing up on the ethics of each organisation.

You share the same office with Billy, at the far end of the room where you sit at your desk and work quietly each day. When you need to make calls, or take meetings, you do it in the adjoining conference room, making sure to work around Billy's meetings.

Sometimes, you catch him staring at you when he's talking quietly on the phone, or deep in thought, and you grow accustomed to him zoning out in your direction.

You haven't seen much of Dominic, your schedule being very flexible. Which meant that you usually come in late, and then leave with Billy long after he's gone.

And you don't want to admit it, not to yourself, and definitely not to the man that coerced you into marriage, but you kind of maybe like it here.

It's a big responsibility though, and you know things will get harder as time progresses, but sometimes you look over at Billy, answering calls and sending emails, and you feel a sense of calm wash over you.

Once a week though, he's a magnificent force to be reckoned with.

You remember the first time you saw him in tactical gear, and you had to fight the urge to jump him in the office, on his desk.

It had become a silent fantasy, once a week, he'd go down to the training floor to help run tactical simulations, and observe the skill of his men.

You'd never seen him fight, but you could imagine it, and the imagery ruined your panties constantly.

You think about it a lot. The insanity of your situation, a month ago you were crying in your bathtub after being aggressively dumped.

Now? You're sitting in Anvil's rooftop restaurant looking out at the New York skyline during lunch.

You were wondering when would be a good time to tell your family and friends. Maybe you could downplay it, say you wanted something private. You knew your mother would take it like her own personal insult, acting as if you'd done it because you secretly hated her.

But maybe your friends would make a more reasonable focus group, there was a message from the group chat asking to hang out later this week sitting in your phone, and maybe, their reactions would help with your family's.

Maybe you could introduce him as you boyfriend? Would you hurt his feelings? Should you care about his feelings? You really didn't want any more people silently accusing you of marrying him for his money. Especially when you couldn't even remember the wedding.

You had more questions for Billy, things you were honestly afraid of knowing. Why you? Did he pick you on random? An easy target? Or did he scout you thoroughly before entrapping you in holy matrimony?

You didn't know which scenario was worse.

And what about the rings? You look down at the unique design sitting on your finger.

You remember the night you showed Dominic. He'd gone home after a night of drinking with his friends, and he'd just started telling you the sweetest things. It had made you giggle at the time. Explaining to you that he thought you might be it for him, and that he'd want you forever. In a quick moment, as a little laugh, you'd shown him the rings, telling him that you'd love to wear these if he'd ever- whenever he decided-

How could Billy have known?

Unless he'd been tapping Dominic's phone. Or maybe, by a long shot, Nic had shown him?

You blink.

Scarier thoughts.

You were a little afraid to act against Billy, like really act against him. You didn't know what he was capable of.

But surely, by marrying you, he'd given you the resources and opportunity to be capable of things that could match him?

Something to look into.

If you wanted.

That's what you think you should want... under the circumstances... but what did you really want?

You wanted your heart to stop pounding when you finally returned to his office to find him working quietly, after being in a meeting through most of lunch.

"Did you have lunch?" You ask, looking at him carefully.

He glances up, and you can kind of see the masked frustration in his eyes.

"Not yet, baby, it's okay, I'll manage."

You make a hum of dissatisfaction, moving up to him to lean against his desk.

"Mister Russo," you chide, and you watch him resist the smile as he looks up at you, he looks so boyishly innocent and your hand cups his chin gently, tilting his head higher so that you can place a gentle kiss on his soft lips.

Surely you had to be some type of lucky? To be able to kiss this man freely whenever you wanted? This couldn't be wrong.

"If you get something to eat soon, I'll sleep naked next to you tonight."

His eyelids droop, pleased at the thought.

"I'll have my secretary bring something up in a minute then."

You smile, a kiss to the nose.

"Good boy." You whisper.

A small sound of pleasure leaves his chest that you pay no mind to, completely missing the way his eyes widen in shock as you walk away from him.

There's a file on your desk, and you hum curiously, sitting down comfortably before flipping it open- and then immediately flipping it shut, eyes widening in shock.

Blood rushes to your head as you look up at Billy, whose eyes are already on you, a pleased look on his face, his deviousness shining through.

Your mouth opens to say something to him, but no words come out.

You're interrupted by his phone ringing, and he keeps his eyes on you as he picks up the device and greets the person on the other end with his last name.

He's temporarily distracted, and you grab the edge of the manilla folder and open it slowly.

There are.... pictures of you.

You remember suggesting it to him, asking for him to take pictures of you but you'd never expected that he would.

Which was honestly your fault because of course he would.

What did you expect? When he was fully sheathed in your sleeping body- that he wouldn't lean back a little to take a shot of the way you look stretched around him?

Where did he even get a polaroid camera from? How did you not wake up from the flash?

Another picture, your hand wrapped around his cock, his hand covering yours, you can see the peek of your breasts through your sleep shirt. The tip of his cock is slick and shiny with precum and your mouth waters for a taste. You think about the ways he must have touched you- used you while you were asleep in his bed.

You flip again, two of his obscenely large fingers are pressed into your mouth to the second knuckle. It's like you can still feel them, pressing against your tongue even though you weren't conscious when he took the photo. The images alone are able to elicit that much of a reaction from you.

The last picture is a shot between your legs, spread open wide to show off your most intimate parts, dripping an abundance of his come.

You swallow, body tingling and flick your eyes up to meet his.

He's still got the phone pressed to his ear, but his eyes are fixed on you, warm and inviting and melts every thought from your head in a sizzling sweep.

All you feel is desire, the need is so tangible inside you that you're not sure if you can do anything else but follow the feeling.

You stand, grabbing the folder, and moving to sit on the couch on the far end of the room, directly opposite to him.

You feel devious, and also maybe a little bit curious about how he'll react to what you're going to do next.

You avoid his gaze, casually opening the folder and leaning back a little. You prop your arm on the side of the couch so that the folder blocks your face from view. You study the pictures for a long time, listening to his clipped responses as he talks on the phone. It's a bunch of 'yes' and 'no's' followed up with dates and times for various things. His voice stutters when you spread your thighs, moving your free hand over your skin casually, as if there's no one looking at you.

You push it further, tugging your skirt up, spreading your legs wider so that you can press your fingers to the damp fabric between your thighs.

You hiss as your body gets some much needed pleasure, your eyes skimming over the pictures, using them as fuel to carry out your little show.

You want to sneak a peek at him, look at his face- Is he looking at you? Is he touching himself? But you know one look into those domineering, dark eyes and you'll be on your knees crawling to him.

So instead, you meander your fingers lower, pushing under the fabric of your panties, to touch your bare clit.

You hum, your body relaxing as your fingers dip lower, catching some wetness from your entrance and drawing it up to your clit to reduce friction.

You moan, your head falling back as you touch that spot just right, arching your back when you speed up and relaxing when you slow down.

The folder drops from your face, but your head is tossed back so that you can't see him, your eyes closed as one of your fingers tease your entrance, pushing in to the first knuckle.

You breathe his name, thinking about the ways he's pleasured you, about the way he looks at you and smiles at you and kisses you-

When there's a knock at the door, you raise your head in a panic, pulling your skirt down in a rush, making sure the folder is closed.

Your eyes meet his naturally. He looks calm outwardly, but there's a tenseness to him. His jaw is clenched, his breathing is sharp. One of his fists is curled tightly, resting atop his desk.

His eyes send a shiver over you, warm and inviting and you feel yourself get wetter in response.

"Come in." He calls, and his secretary pokes her head in.

"Hey Mr. Russo, Mrs. Russo," she greets, "I got that lunch you asked for."

"Great, here, put it on my desk." He says, and you watch her move easily to place the small box on his desk.

"I heard there's a small weather system moving in tonight, you guys be safe." She says.

You wish her the same with a smile as she leaves.

Your eyes are on each other in the next moment, his are heated and daring, challenging you to do something else.

You take his challenge, reaching up to unbutton your blouse.

The door's not even locked, but who would dare to enter Billy's office without knocking?

Your blouse is open in the next second, and you reach up your skirt to tug your panties down your legs.

God you just want him so badly, you couldn't stop thinking about him, you probably shouldn't be feeling this way, but you didn't care. You just wanted to have him, and hold him, and keep him just as much as he keeps you.

You wanted to own Billy Russo.

Your fingers are in your mouth in the next second, teasing him, getting them wet and spreading your thighs to resume your play.

It's hot, having him sit at his desk and watch you, you bet he's just rock hard and desperate for a touch of you. The lunch on his desk sits untouched at the edge, as your body fights the magnetic pull it has to his.

Your other hand, free from the folder, tugs one of the cups of your bra down, fingers worrying your nipple into a stiff bud, gasping as you push a single digit into yourself.

It's an empty feeling, of not being full enough, your entrance clenching around your finger, begging for more, begging for a Billy sized intrusion into your body.

You keep going, with no protest from him, pushing a second finger into yourself and pumping slowly.

Your body responds easily, the photos, paired with the right flush of arousal and you're gasping desperately, pushing yourself into the throes of pleasure.

It's so much easier, knowing your body, knowing exactly where to touch, how much pressure to use, your back arches and you come with a stuttered cry.

The pleasure blooms in your head, and you let out another little groan, your fingers still buried inside of you, riding out the orgasm.

When you hear the sound of a belt being undone a lot closer that you expect, you raise your head, your fingers slipping out.

He's a few steps away, dark eyes fixed on you, his belt undone and jingling with each step he makes.

"Getting yourself nice and ready for me, hmm?" He asks, undoing his pants, reaching into his boxers to pull his cock free.

You watch with open mouth as he sits beside you, reaching to grab your hips and pull your body to his.

"Put your fingers in my mouth." He says, and you oblige silently.

His mouth seals around your fingers just as he pulls you onto his cock, his tip stretching you open easily.

You both groan in unison.

The way he fills every inch of you, has you gasping, eyes rolling back from the very pleasure of it.

He's so deep inside you, it almost feels like he's deeper that he really is- you can almost feel him in your gut.

He sucks on your fingers as he begins to fuck you. He pulls and pushes your body, guiding you into riding him as an even pace.

You don't think too much of it when you push your fingers deeper into his mouth, pressing down on the back of his tongue for a moment.

He gags a little, and you give him a small smile, tugging your fingers out of his mouth slowly. His pace increases, your hips slamming forcefully together, small grunts leaving your lips.

"Did you enjoy that? Putting on a little show for me?" He asks between breaths. You mewl, unable to respond as you try to roll your hips on top of his.

"I know you did- God you're so fucking wet for me- how the fuck do I get any work done when I have you so close?"

You let out a little giggle, circling your hips and hearing him grunt in approval.

His fingers sift into your hair, pulling you forward and you sigh blissfully as your mouth meets his. He doesn't stop there, tugging your hair free until it's loose around your face.

You pull back, smiling curiously at him as he pets his hands slowly down the back of your head.

"Every inch of skin that isn't touching mine is criminal." Billy murmurs, pulling you close until your foreheads touch.

You sigh into his mouth, little puffs of air as he bottoms out inside you.

You pick up the pace, and he groans in approval, his hands firm on your hips as you gasp every time he bottoms out inside of you.

He's so deliciously big, and you know you think about it every time he's inside you yet you can't help it. Billy just pleases you in a way no one else ever could. The chemistry between you two is potent, the attraction is too strong to fight. You ache to crawl under his skin and live in the space between his lungs if he'd only let you.

"Gonna cum." You warn, swallowing his grunts eagerly.

He groans, his forearms pull you to his body tightly, his lips pressed to yours.

"On my cock, just like we practiced." He encourages and the words go right down your spine.

There's a loud roaring in your head, a warning that this orgasm is going to knock you flat.

You tighten around his cock, and he feels so much bigger, definitely making a space inside of you that was only his.

Your fingers fist the material of his jacket harshly, the other hand gripping his shoulder for dear life as you both chase your swift approaching highs.

Logically, you know this can't be love. You barely remember consenting to the marriage in the first place- and Billy had taken so many things away from you already.

So why do the words 'I love you' threaten to spill from your mouth as you reached your peak?

Thankfully, Billy's cock renders you speechless, your mouth opening wider, your back arching to press your body even closer into him as you cum. The world comes to a pause as your body tenses, before you shake with your release. Through it all, he doesn't stop, and the next thing you know, you're on your back, with six-feet of solid husband pressing into you.

This position gives him all the control, and his thrusts get that much harsher.

"So fucking beautiful when you cum, baby." Billy grunts into your neck.

"So pretty when you take from me.... Gonna fill you up now, just like you deserve."

You can only let out an unintelligent sound of approval. The give and take of your bodies transcend the barriers of your skin until you can feel him, everywhere, all at once and you know with indisputable fact, that Billy Russo belongs to you.

You say his name, because it's all you can remember after he's stripped your barriers bare and opened you up to him with wanton fingers and desperate eyes.

Your orgasm is sweet in your mouth, tacky and slippery under your skin, and sticky where your bodies meet. He groans against your mouth when he feels it and your body can't contain the pleasure, so you tilt your head back and you scream.

It's cathartic.

Like the lid being lifted off a pot that's been building pressure, and you scream in bliss as he guides your body through release.

"Good girl." He pants, "Good wife- oh fuck I'm gonna-"

And then he's groaning primally, barely contained, his hands in clenched fists beside your head as he comes deep inside you, his body shuddering for just a second when you clench around him to help him empty all of his cum into you.

It feels like a gift, that you accept greedily, always eager to keep his cum safe inside of you, silently thinking about the possibility of it taking.

You wonder if he wants kids. You wonder if you do. You sigh when he drags his softening cock out of you, reaching for an embroidered handkerchief in his pocket, using the silky material to clean up whatever slips out of you.

"You're perfect, y'know that?" He says to you softly, and you swallow nervously.

It wasn't something you were used to hearing, especially not after sex, when he'd already gotten what he wanted from you. Before sex? Sure. During? Maybe.

Billy had been the first person to praise you after the act. After. When he was already sated and there wasn't any reason to.

"Really?" You ask softly, and he looks up at you from his gentle clean up. Another thing he wouldn't let you do. Always insistent that he cleans you up.

"Really." He says with a firm voice, "You're perfect, and you're gorgeous and you're mine."

For the first time, those words don't scare you.

You can feel easy acceptance of the words. They're true, and you want them to be.

"I'm yours." You confirm to him softly, and the rest of words are unspoken, but you think them to yourself.

Are you mine?

His lips are soft on yours, insistent.

"Did I hurt you at all, baby?" He asks quietly into the space between your lips.

You look up at him, shaking your head easily. His hands cup your face and you close your eyes as he leans in to give the top of your head a kiss.

"You know you can always tell me right?" He says.

"I know." You respond simply, because you really did know.

When his phone rings, he turns to look at it with an adorable frown on his face, looking back at you. You give him a little smile and a nod, telling him it's okay, before watching him move to pick it up.

After a few minutes, you finally build up the resolve to make your way on shaky legs to his bathroom and back. You don't even bother with your heels, leaving them kicked off on his office floor.

It doesn't take you long to fall asleep, though you don't really mean to, only wanting to close your eyes for a few moments, but suddenly you're asleep.

You wake when he tries to move you.

"Wha?" You mumble, sleepily, breathing a deep sigh when he guides you to wrap your arms around his neck.

"Time to go home, baby." Billy says, and your eyes close of their own accord.

You don't realise or register what he's doing until he's picking you up.

You let out a little sound of protest.

"'M too heavy." You say, still half asleep in his chest. Your eyelids are so heavy, and your brain is full of fog.

"Go back to sleep. I'll wake you when we get home."

You make another sound of protest, and you hear the elevator bell ding as it reaches your floor.

"You can put me down if you want. I can walk." You try again.

"Hush, sweetheart, relax, I've got you."

"You'll hurt yourself carrying me."

Billy chuckles.

"I won't. I've carried marines heavier than you on my back in the desert for miles."

You feel his lips on your forehead, "I can carry my pretty wife for a couple of minutes."

You groan.

"But 'm too heavy." You try again.

"Who told you that, hmm?"

Dominic's face pops into your head and you sigh. Honestly, he'd never said it in so many words to you... but you knew... from the way he'd raise his eyebrows when he caught you with a piece of cake, or the way he'd get just a little too happy when you said you were going to the gym. You knew what he thought, even though he never had to say it.

"No one... it's just logic. I'm heavy."

"Well, if I can lift you, then you can't be that heavy now can you? So why don't you go back to sleep for me?" He murmurs softly, and though you try, you can't fight it.

"I love seeing your tattoo." You murmur against him.

He chuckles, cupping a handful of warm water to trickle over your shoulder in an attempt to help you bathe.

The snake in question moves as he does, you smooth a hand over the ink of the open maw on his chest.

Like you'd noticed before, the body of the snake covers two raised scars on his shoulder. You're of the opinion that the snake covers those scars on purpose.

"Will you tell me how you got them?" You ask, tracing a thumb over the scars, feeling him take a shaky breath.

"Got beaten pretty bad when I was a kid." He says in a breath and your heart freezes in your chest. You can tell that there's something worse coming.

"I grew up in a group home, wasn't bad, could have been worse I guess, but they used to let people come around to help out sometimes."

He scoops some more water over your shoulder, deep in thought. You don't want to break his focus, eager to hear him open up about his childhood.

"There was this one guy, he used to play stickball with us. I thought he was the coolest. Told me I could go pro if I kept practicing."

A lump rises in your throat when you realise where this story is going.

"He- well he tried to- " Billy stops, takes a deep breath, shakes his head.

"It's okay. You don't have to tell me." You say quietly, and he gives you a little smile.

"He called me pretty, he tried to touch me, I fought him off, he fought back, broke my arm... the end."

You frown at his quick retelling.

"So... he didn't-?"

"No... but I pissed him off enough."

"How old were you?"

"Ten?"

"Jesus, Billy." You press your head into the crook of his neck, your body against his in the bath, your heart breaking for him.

"He got away with it?"

"Our legal system is a joke."

Your shoulders drop.

"He's still out there?"

"No."

You raise your head curiously to look up at him.

He can't meet your eyes.

"I killed him." Billy confesses to you quietly, he's shaking, refusing to look at you.

It's a tense moment, and you don't think before you respond.

"Good."

He finally gives you a shocked look.

"You're not... disgusted?"

"That you killed someone who hurt you and probably other kids? Not at all."

"I murdered him, I put a stickball bat through his chest." Billy clarifies, in an attempt to show you how terrible he is. Or at least that's the impression you get.

"I hope he felt it." You say, resolved to idea.

Billy's eyes shift from shocked to something warm. He gives you another little smile.

"You mean that? You're not saying that now and running away later?"

The words are too much to say. You're afraid of them, of what it means. So instead, you raise your head, and you press your lips to his.

Soft, and the taste of his mouth sets you on fire. But you're content to just kiss him, chase away his insecurities with your reassurance. His hand moves from your hip to the back of your neck, holding you securely, little kisses broken between sighs and gentle smiles, until finally you relax against him once more.

"Is that why you got this here?" You ask, tracing his tattoo with gentle fingers.

Billy hums in confirmation.

"Snakes shed their skin all the time. They're symbols of transformation, rebirth... healing. They're misunderstood creatures, but can be deadly when underestimated."

Not unlike Billy himself, you think, and you wrap your arms around his shoulders, and you hope that he understands that you're not going to run, without having to say it.

"There's absolutely no way I am ever going to sleep with my employee." Abigail announces.

You swallow, listening to all the other girls react to her comment, butting in with 'what ifs' and other scenarios. You look down and stir your drink as you take it in.

You'd been friends with the witty group of girls since you shared a living space with them in college. There was Milla and Katie and Bryn, of course Abigail and you, made five.

Milla was dating Dominic's best friend, and it was in part one of the reasons you'd decided to come today, to find out if Nic had said anything to them. Billy hadn't accompanied you having some extra work to do, but he'd sent you with two bodyguards that had initially started out as five.

You kind of missed him, wondering what he was doing right now, and you imagined him typing away at his laptop at home, or reading a business report with a pair of glasses that he claimed to not need but it made him see the fine print just a little easier.

Loud laughter gets your attention and you smile, looking up. You wait for a casual break in the conversation to speak.

"So, I actually have some news." You say to them, and you freeze when all eyes swivel to you.

Oh shit, this was a lot.

"Yeah?" Bryn encourages when you've been silent for too long.

"I kind of did something... maybe a little stupid, but I'm kinda okay with it." You say, knowing that you were more than okay with it.

There's more silence as they wait for you to continue. At this point you were hoping for an interruption.

"After Dominic and I broke up... I went to Vegas, and I got drunk one night and uh...." You make an odd sound of distress, "I got married."

There's a moment of stunned silence, before everyone reacts all at once, above it all you hear Abigail's voice loudest.

"You got what!?" She screams.

You can't help laughing at their reactions.

"I kind of can't remember how it happened? But I woke up married." You say raising your hand to show then the ring.

"Oh my god I thought that was just a random ring- You're telling me that's a wedding ring?" Bryn says with a hysterical inflection in her voice.

You smile, nodding along at their reactions.

"You're getting it annulled?" Milla asks, and when you focus on her, you notice her features are calm, not as shocked as the others, and you think she might have known before.

"I'm not. I like him, he's nice, and we're... living together." You say just as Abigail takes a sip of her drink and she has to fight with spitting it out.

"Living with him?!" She says after she manages to swallow, "Who is he?"

You blink, pulling your bottom lip into your mouth to chew on it for a moment.

"His name is Billy Russo.... He uhh... he's Anvil's CEO."

It gets so quiet you can hear the conversations happening in the table across from you.

"You married Dominic's boss?"

"Well... no.... his boss' boss' boss... if we're being technical."

"Is he hot?"

"Very."

"And you waited until now to tell us?"

"I'm sorry?"

"Wait." Abigail interrupts, "How did Dominic react when he found out?"

You fiddle with your fingers under the table.

"I didn't get a chance to explain it to him. He thinks I cheated on him."

"He does think that." Milla says, grabbing everyone's attention. Her face is stern, commanding, she looks as though she's about to stand up for a friend, and you're of the realisation that the friend is not you.

"Dominic said you cheated on him, that you must have, because the rings are custom made to you. How do you explain that?"

Oh fuck.

"I- I'm not too sure-"

"-And his boss? Out of everyone to 'accidentally' marry? How convenient is that?"

"N-no- it-"

"-Dom thinks he introduced you to his boss, and you just worked your way to the top. Isn't that why you convinced him to stay with Anvil all those years ago?"

"That's not true at all." You say, your voice shaking with the stress.

You look around at Bryn, Abigail and Katie, but they're all giving you curious looks.

"It's not? What do you think about that, Dominic?" Milla says, looking behind you.

Ambush.

It's the first word that comes to mind and honesty if you were a smarter person you would have seen it coming.

"I think it's really convenient that she quit her job and started working at Anvil almost as soon as we broke up." Dominic says, grabbing a chair and fitting himself into the space between you and Katie.

Your shoulders drop.

"I didn't." You say weakly, looking at Dominic with sad eyes, "I never cheated. I wouldn't. I really liked you, and you broke up with me."

"Well you got over me really fast, then, didn't you?"

You bottom lip wobbles. You can see it in their eyes that no one believes you.

"Was that the point of this?" You turn to look at Milla, "Was that the reason you guys invited me here today?"

"We just wanted to expose a cheater."

"I didn't!" You try again, and she rolls her eyes at you.

You realise that there's nothing you're going to say that will make them believe you. You realise that you've just lost your friends.

You grab your things, shoving them into your bag, standing.

"I'm leaving." You say, dropping some bills down on the table to cover your drinks in afterthought. Dominic stands when you do, blocking your path.

"No you're not, we didn't even bring out the cake yet. Here it comes now."

Your heart is stuck in your throat, glued there with something that hardens into cement and makes everything hurt.

The waitress brings out a cake. An actual cake with white frosting and red lettering.

The words 'Congratulations, Cheater,' stares back at you.

You didn't think Dominic had this level of spite inside of him.

You back away from the table, but you flinch when Dominic reaches out to grab your wrist tightly.

"Woah, hey, let her go." Abigail says, getting to her feet, "She can leave if she wants."

At the same time, one of Billy's bodyguards notices the little commotion and steps forward to intervene, pushing Dominic away from you.

You back away, you don't look at anyone, avoiding all eye contact as you leave.

He finds you curled up on the couch of your office with one of his old t-shirts gripped in your hands.

You must not have locked the door, because he'd never violate the boundaries of your office otherwise, even though you knew he could if he wanted to.

"This is all your fault." You whisper out loud, not turning to look at him, pressing your nose into his shirt and breathing in the remnants of his scent.

Your statement wasn't completely true. It wasn't all his fault. It was also Dominic's, for breaking up with you and thinking he was entitled to embarrass you that way when you hadn't done anything he'd accused you of.

"I am, so, so sorry this happened." He says earnestly behind you, and you curl in further on yourself.

"Everyone thinks I'm a bad person." You say, a couple of hot tears slip from your eyes and trickle down the side of your face. You swallow the painful lump in your throat. Your face was swollen and aching from all the crying you'd done in the hour it took Billy to get here from wherever he'd been before.

"You're not a bad person." Billy says with conviction in his tone, leaning forward to press his nose into your hair.

You huff.

"Only you think that." You say to him, using his shirt to dab some of your tears.

His sigh tickles the back of your neck. It's one of frustration, you figure he must be out of his depth with this one and can't figure out what to do.

"Okay... let's get cleaned up and ready for bed, and you'll be a lot more comfortable there. I can get us ice cream, or we can watch something dumb on TV."

"Billy." You say with a tone that said that you just wanted to be left alone.

"No, I'm not leaving you here to mope. Come." he says, gripping your hips and forcing your body to uncurl and turn to face him.

When you catch sight of him you sit up in shock.

His face is dirty, covered in dirt and a splash of blood. There's the beginning of a bruise on his chin and cheek and he looks rough for wear.

"What happened?" You ask in shock, reaching out to cup his jaw, you feel him press his face into the palm of your hand. He's dressed in his tactical wear, but it's all scuffed and dirty.

"I was in the middle of a training sim when I heard what happened. I might have sped things up by running solo into enemy territory." He murmurs, peeking an eye open to look at your reaction.

"Isn't strategy the point of those sims? Else what's the point?"

"The point was that my wife was in distress and I wanted to get to her."

You can't help the involuntary clench your body does at his words. A bad time to be feeling like you want to jump him but that's all you can think about right now.

The tactical gear looks good on him, it holds onto him securely as he kneels beside the couch you're on.

"You have blood on your face." You say.

"Sorry." He mumbles and you shake your head, reaching for a clean corner of his shirt and using it to wipe away the splashes of blood on his cheek.

"I guess a shower would be okay." You say between sniffles and he smiles.

"Okay. Let's go."

You're not feeling your best, but even sad, you couldn't tear your eyes away from the sight of a dishevelled Billy, tugging his tactical shirt off. A white vest on underneath, his arms are covered in bruises, the back of his hands are bloody. You think you could moan from the sight alone.

He tugs a gun from the waistband of his pants, setting it down onto the bathroom countertop, before untucking his vest and pulling it off.

You thank the stars.

Rippling ink as he raises his arms above his head in an effort to stretch any kinks in his back. You blink in surprise when you hear a soft 'pop', followed by his groan of blissful satisfaction.

You stay silent, afraid to make a sound lest he stop the shedding of his clothes. Like a battered deity, he leans down to tug at the laces of his boots, kicking them off.

You want to help, you want to touch, to do something more than look, but you're fixated on him as if he's your favourite painting come to life.

You appreciate his beauty, still embedded in the depths of despair, you can only blink in surprise when he looks at you. For a moment, you'd forgotten you were real, but when he looks at you... he reminds you.

You don't hold his gaze for long, turning back to look at the shower, reaching to unbutton your pants.

It's only a means to avoid his gaze, because when he turns away from you to shed his pants, you turn back to look at him.

His thighs aren't thick, but shaped well for his body type, muscles flexing as he kicks them off.

You see his ass next, as his boxers follow down his legs, and your heart kicks up a beat as he turns confidently, doesn't say a word as he steps toward you.

He gives you a smile, opening the shower door and stepping in to turn on the controls.

You watch in awe as the rain showerhead starts up, scattering droplets down the planes of his body. The water runs a little red with blood, and a little brown from dirt before it clears.

When he looks back, you gulp.

"Coming?" He asks, and you reach for the edge of your top without a second thought.

Curled into him.

You let out a soft sigh of peace.

His hand is roaming over your back in slow circles. His skin is a little cold from your recent shower.

"Why me?" You finally say to him, your curiosity finally spilling out of your mouth. You think you're ready to hear the answer.

His hand pauses it's rhythmic motion on your back for a second, and only resume when you shift in discontent.

"Sure you wanna know?" He asks carefully.

"Yeah."

TWO YEARS AGO:

"There's really no vision here," Dominic says, his arm wrapped around your shoulders, guiding you away from the small office party happening on the top floor of the old Anvil Facility. It was more of a gym than a start-up company, catering to tactical training more than office jobs.

"You think so?" You say to him, wrinkling your nose as you wonder where Dominic was taking you. Were you going to see his desk?

"Yeah, this'll never work because we just don't have good enough contacts. Russo is a military man, he wasn't made for business." Nic says easily, and you hum, realising that you've wandered far enough from the party, your little lilac dress molded to your skin.

"I don't think that's true." You murmur to him, deep in thought, thinking about the man you'd just met.

"And what do you think you know about the company I work at?" Dominic says with a haughty tone and you try your hardest not to roll your eyes.

"I mean, the man you're describing, and the man I just met in there aren't the same person. You can see, that he clearly has the drive to succeed. I don't think you should give up on that. I mean sure, things aren't good now, but I think you'd benefit from sticking around so much more in the long run."

"Really?" He murmurs, and you can hear the indecisiveness in his voice and you know now's the best time to prove your point.

"A really basic example could just be the Christmas bonuses this year. He could have cut those in half safely and no one would have complained, he could have kept the money, or put it into getting word out through ads or whatever." You wave your hand in the air dismissively, "Instead he put it into the resource he found most important- the people. With a mindset like that, there's no way he'd struggle to get Anvil off the ground. You have to stop thinking in what's happening now, and think about what the company is capable of."

There's a moment of silence as he mulls over your words.

"That's a good point I guess, he also buys the best gear for the people on the field, instead of cheaping out."

You nod along to his words.

"Imagine the things the company is capable of. Don't you want to be a part of that?" You ask, deep in thought, just like he was, about the possibilities.

"Huh. Okay, I guess I'll stick around a little longer then." He says, kissing the top of your head and you laugh. Going with him wherever he wanted to go.

"I'd been just around the corner, stepped out to take a phone call or something and I heard you." His hand slides up your back and his fingers roll over the muscles at the behind your neck easily.

"You have no idea how that made me feel. It was like you knew me. Made me want to be a better man just to prove you right. You believed in me, and you'd barely met me."

You let out a long sigh, a hand on his bicep, moving up till you touch the tail of his snake tattoo.

"But, I'm sure a lot of people believe in you."

He laughs quietly.

"I think back then, everyone thought I was out of my depth, just waiting to watch me fuck up... and hearing you say those things was exactly what I needed. I wanted to become the man you thought I was capable of being."

The words shock you deeply, unwilling to admit that you could have such an effect on another person.

"So, you liked me since then?"

He hums.

"Not exactly then, when I got to learn about you more... yeah."

"How did you learn more about me?" You ask.

He's quiet for a moment. You raise your head to look up at him. He's got a pained frown on his face.

"I'm not a good man." He confesses to you quietly.

"I know, but you can tell me anyway." You reassure.

"I... cloned his phone, I'd read your messages to him."

You swallow anxiously.

"My private messages to my boyfriend." You clarify unnecessarily so that he gets the idea.

His eyes squeeze shut.

"Yeah, it wasn't a good moment, but I needed you so bad, and I knew he wasn't good enough, and I knew you'd realise that eventually, so I just sat back and waited. I didn't read every message, but once a week I'd check and make sure you were okay."

"Oh, Billy." You say with a sigh, leaning forward to press your body closer to his. He presses against you eagerly.

It's not something you hadn't already expected. In your assessment of possible scenarios, you knew someone as powerful as he was would find no trouble in getting access to things he shouldn't have access to.

You didn't know what the right way to react was. You knew it was a red flag, a borderline scary and toxic trait exhibited by a man that had coerced you into marriage. But you also knew him. For all his flaws he'd never lied to you.

"Why don't you hate me?" He whispers under his breath, and you don't think he meant to say it out loud.

You respond anyway, not because you want to reassure him, but because you feel like returning his truth with some of your own.

"I don't want to." You say simply.

He pulls you even closer, your face pressed into his shoulder as he holds you tight. You spend a long time like that, locked in his arms, half asleep.

When he tilts your head up to give you what you assume is a chaste goodnight kiss, you find that your body heats up, instead of relaxing.

Your toes curl as you slant your lips against his, unable to stop yourself from delivering passionate kisses. He lets out a little groan, hand smoothing down your body easily and back up again. You sit up, pushing him onto his back before kicking a leg over his hips.

It's only then that you break the kiss.

"Are you sure?" He asks, before you can voice a similar question to him.

"I want to. Do you?"

He studies you for a moment, dark eyes, deep in thought.

"Yeah." He says with a nod, you smile, mimicking his nod as you bend to reach his mouth again.

He's hard between your thighs, hot and insistent against the little fabric of your underwear.

When he brings his hands up to your hips, you react without thinking, grabbing his wrists and pinning them to either side of his head.

He blinks up at you in surprise.

He can obviously overpower you at any moment, but instead he pauses to see what you're going to do.

"Do you trust me?" You ask quietly.

He runs his tongue over his bottom lip, in deep concentration, before giving you a little nod.

"Close your eyes." You instruct, and he does so after a little moment.

When you pull away from him, he sits up.

"Where-"

"-shhhh, trust me." You interrupt, and you leave the room for a minute to gather supplies.

You grab all the little candles you can find, placing them around the room and lighting them one by one.

You have a odd want to make this one special, and you take your time, shedding your clothes and grabbing one of his white shirts from his closet, draping it over your body and leaving a small gap open between your breasts.

You dim all the lights, admiring the way he waits patiently, the only sign of his anxiety is the way his fingers twitch at his sides.

He definitely had a reason to be anxious. He'd put a lot of trust into you by closing his eyes. After the scary revelation from earlier, you could bet he was probably expecting you to run away.

"Take your boxers off for me." You finally say, and he lets out a breath, pushing the black fabric off his body.

Gorgeous.

Every inch of him.

His knuckles are still red from their earlier use, and he's got some bruises worsening on his chest and one on his thigh but none of it takes away from him. The light of the candles dances shadows onto his skin and you marvel at how easy his beauty can make you forget about everything else.

You admire the snake on his shoulder, with its winding visage, before giving him permission to open his eyes.

You're hoping you look just as breathtaking as he does, wearing his shirt in the light of the flickering candles, you really pray that he finds you nice to look at.

His lips part, taking you in, you can't help looking away from him for a second.

"You are... so beautiful." He says, voice barely above a whisper, and your heats flutters, a shy smile forming on your face.

"Thank you." You say, moving toward him, bringing yourself to sit carefully on his lap. When he raises his hands to touch you, you catch them, pressing them back to his sides.

You lean forward, and when he shuts his eyes, thinking you're going to kiss him, you deflect, kissing his shoulder instead. You kiss from one shoulder to the next, listening to his shallow breathing, bringing your hips closer until his cock is nestled between your thighs.

"You're tormenting me." He says matter-of-factly, and you smile against the column of his neck.

"And don't you think you deserve it, even just a little?"

An exasperated sigh.

"I deserve it," Billy acknowledges, "Is that what you're gonna do now? Punish me?"

You feel the way his cock jumps after he says it, you know he likes the idea.

"Mmm," you hum, continuing to kiss his neck, "I like the idea, but I've never done it before."

"That's okay, just do what you feel like, if you feel like stopping, I'll take over."

"How considerate." You say, just before you bite down on his sweet spot.

He lets out a loud groan, his body tensing, before it relaxes. You lick the bite gently to soothe it.

"Too much?" You ask carefully.

"More. Please."

Your breath stutters in your throat. You feel your body flush with approval for his words.

There's a spot that clenches inside you- right below your navel- a spot that flutters when you think about being filled with his come.

You bite him again, toes curling in response to the blissful sounds he makes.

You watch his skin redden, you know they'll fade after a while, but you can't help admiring the beauty of marking him.

You want his tongue, but you're too shy to actually say it, instead, opting to climb off of him, ignoring his sounds of protest to make your way up the bed to settle against the pillows.

He turns to look at you, his shirt widening to expose your breasts.

Carefully, you part your thighs and watch his throat bob as his eyes drift down to your aching cunt.

You reach to slip a finger between your legs and he moves without command, settling his body between your thighs, stopping your hand from touching yourself.

"I'll do it." He offers, kissing the wedding band on your finger, before adjusting himself to flatten his tongue against your clit.

You let out a gasp of surprise, your head falling back in bliss.

He keeps his tongue in place for a few moments, prompting you to raise your head and look at him.

His eyes are on you, as he begins sweeping his tongue from side to side slowly. It feels so good, as Billy sets the perfect rhythm in the place you need it most.

Your pussy makes a series of clenches, desperate for more of his tongue, and a shiver goes through you as he continues.

He reaches up, warm hands gliding over your thighs, bruised knuckles gripping at your hips for a moment before grabbing your hands that are fisted in the sheets and bringing them to sift through his hair.

He groans when you pull, pressing deeper into the space between your thighs until there's no air left between his mouth and your pussy. The tip of his tongue rolls over your clit, up and down, and then side to side, until he finally settles on a slow circular motion.

Your hips buck into his mouth, you press his head as close as possible for a moment before feeling a little guilty and releasing your grip on his head.

"Sorry." You murmur, which prompts him to stop, shaking his head as he speaks.

"Don't be. I love your little cunt so fucking much." He praises.

You make a sound of approval as he drops his head again.

He licks you repeatedly, his tongue applying just the right pressure to your clit that makes you boneless. You squeeze your eyes shut, trying to process the undeniable pleasure rolling through your body. His beard scratches harmlessly between your thighs, your skin tingling from the gentle sensation that only helps to work you up.

The sounds are sloppy and wet, the eagerness of his movements make you want to own him in any way you can.

"Billy oh god yes." You cry, can't stop yourself from singing his praises.

He moans against you, you can feel his tongue drift lower to lick over your entrance.

You gasp at the sensation, wanting to feel his tongue explore you.

He pushes his tongue in as far as it will go, no doubt getting the most undiluted taste of you, humming while he does it.

His tongue is dextrous, just like it always is, with passionate movements that show you his eagerness. To drink you in like a man starving, to make you feel like his current position was the most desirable on the planet.

His grips on your hips tighten, and when it's not enough you can feel him press his face even closer. You worry he might be drowning in you. But he doesn't seem too concerned about it.

You say his name again. It only encourages him to take what he likes from you until your thighs are shaking and your clit is begging for just one more kiss.

Your brain scrambles when he does it. You make the most unintelligent sound as your body tenses up, locking in place for just a moment right before you fall over that edge and into him.

That spot below your navel flutters again, begging for him as he pulls away from you.

You're still catching your breath, his shirt is warm on your skin and you sit up to push it from your shoulders.

You grab his arm, pulling him over to you and lying back until his body covers yours. Your grip is firm on the back of his neck as you guide his mouth to yours.

You both moan into the kiss, starting slowly before the build of emotion is just too much for you to resist kissing him hard.

He kisses over your jaw and neck, giving you a moment to breathe before his lips are on your again.

He slots his thigh between your legs and you press your dripping centre against it shamelessly, happy to feel some relief.

You know you should wait a little longer and get more prep work done but you can't. You can't fight the fire burning inside you to take him.

He falls onto his back easily when you break the kiss to give him a hard shove.

He smiles, gripping your hips as you straddle him.

"If this is a punishment then I should do bad things more often," Billy teases.

You playfully smack his hip and he lets out a groan. You watch his face redden substantially and he looks away from you for a second.

Does he like it when you hit him?

You table the conversation for later as you adjust your hips and reach for his erection.

Sliding onto his cock isn't easy, and you have to take several deep breaths throughout, groaning at the little pinch of pain, as he fills every inch of you.

"So good Billy, fuck." You sigh, he nods mindlessly in agreement.

You start slow, rocking your hips against his, his hands on your hips grip so tightly that he leaves and indent of his ring behind on your skin- as if you needed another reminder that you're his.

You hiss, increasing the pace of your rocking, the muscles in your thighs burn from overuse.

You remember how he told you that he liked it when you ride him, and you decide to make things more difficult for him.

You grab his wrists, pinning them beside him as you lean down to kiss him.

Billy gasps, his breath his hot in your mouth and when you pause your hips to catch your breath, he groans loudly.

"Hit me." He asks quietly, looking up at you with half-lidded eyes.

Your breath catches in your throat.

"You- Are you sure?" You ask easily.

He swallows, nodding, and when you give him a gentle tap on the cheek, his laugh is filled with delirium.

"No baby, harder."

You bite down on your lip, doing as he says.

He groans, pushing his hips up into you. You gasp in surprise, feeling him fuck into you easily from below, your hips moving together in harmony.

"Hit me again, please." He begs and you can't resist him.

It's a proper slap, and his face gets turned to the side. His cheek is red but all he can do is groan loudly and fuck upwards into you.

You're a little surprised at his reaction, and he gives you a heated look before he grips your wrists, sitting up so that he's face to face with you.

He grips both your wrists in one hand and smiles, leaning in to kiss you before he's sucking a mark into your collarbone.

You groan his name and his pace increases.

"You feel so fucking good. I don't think I'm gonna last." He says desperately and you nod your head easily.

"It's okay, I'm close too. You can cum when you're ready."

He groans. His hips hammering up into yours, cock fully fucking you hard like there'll never be another time.

"I'm sorry I did all those things. I just wanted to be yours." He says in between breaths.

"Shhh Billy, we can talk about it later, I'm so close." You reply, too cock drunk to keep your head up so you tuck it into the crook of his neck.

You pull your hands from his grip behind your back, digging them into his biceps as you let out little whines, close to orgasm.

"Yours." Billy breathes, "I'm all yours."

You clench down around him hard, gasping as your orgasm hits, he holds you down on his cock as you trigger his orgasm too. You cling to him like a lifeline as you come down, you stay with your face buried in his chest, exhaustion from the entire day finally catching up to you.

"You mean that?" You ask, half asleep, sighing as you listen to him catch his breath.

His hand is on the back of your head, keeping you close.

"Every word." He confirms.

Falling asleep in his arms is easy after that.

A/N: yeah so I'll correct any mistakes I made later 💓

#billy russo #billy russo x reader #billy russo x female reader #my writings #billy russo smut #dark!billy russo #accidentally on purpose #accidentally on purpose married billy

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