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lovesosweeet · 5 months

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better left unsaid // cth

chapter thirty six

in which orion has leukemia, and calum doesn’t know.

calum hood x fem!oc

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november 5, 2018 san diego, california orion

Spending my 22nd birthday going to visit my new oncologist was not my plan. I hadn’t made much effort to make it happen, but I was hoping to just have a night out in LA with Emelia, her roommates, and some of my classmates. I already had a reservation set up at my favorite rooftop bar for ten people.

I knew Cal had a show — Amsterdam — so I didn’t expect to get to spend it with him. I figured he’d call me after he got offstage while I was out with my friends and I’d answer, tipsy from a few too many espresso martinis, and it would be sweet and everyone with me would think it was so cute that he was so busy but still so present in our relationship.

Clearly, nothing like that is happening today. The only thing that’s the same is Emelia. She’s coming over tonight. I think my moms are getting us all Thai food and we’ll watch a movie or play a game, and I think we’ll have a bonfire, but the night is looking very differently than what I’d planned months ago. Today is the day I find out how chemo went and whether or not I get to live a little longer.

While Mama drives to the hospital, she and Mom are talking about something I stopped paying attention to a long time ago. I’m grateful both of them are coming with me to learn about my fate. My mind is just spinning and I can’t even pin down a single thought, so I find myself distracting my brain by doomscrolling on social media and reading happy birthday texts.

From: kaykay (5sos groupies) happy birthday orion! miss ya and love ya! From: crystal (5sos groupies) baby o!!!! we miss you so so much! we’ll all be home soon and want to see your sweet face if you’ll have us. happy birthday ❤️ From: sierra (5sos groupies) sweet orion!! missing you more than ever! happiest of birthdays to the prettiest of girls ❤️

Macy tagged me in an Instagram story of a collage of pictures we have together—random chemo selfies, the night we celebrated her being cancer free, and the tour sendoff party that happened what feels like a lifetime ago. “MOST BEAUTIFUL BIRTHDAY GIRL EVER! LOVE YOU LONG TIME TY FOR BEING THE BEST” she wrote on top of the photo.

Emelia posted a carousel of our pictures from the past three years, including a very cringey one of us on the first day of class freshman year. We’d somehow shown up to class wearing nearly identical outfits and we decided we were destined to be friends, which was a correct assessment. The most recent one was last week at the beach, when we had a sunset picnic. “Strongest, bravest, kindest, most passionate (and stubborn) girl on the planet. Happy birthday to my soul sister. There’s no one who loves like you and I love having your love in my life. 22 is no match for you! ‘Til death, my friend.”

Ashton has a photo of us getting gelato in Rome two years ago. I think Giuseppe took the picture, but the memory is blurry. All I remember is how divine my pistachio gelato tasted and how jealous Ash was of how much better mine was than his. In the picture, I’m happily taking a lick from mine while Ashton pouts at me, holding his cup of banana gelato that he’d hardly touched. His caption is short and sweet. “Happy birthday to the best girl I know (sorry @kaykay).”

I don’t follow him anymore, but I pull up Cal’s profile to see if he’s posted any stories or anything else today. When his profile picture indicates that he has posted a story I haven’t viewed, out of habit, I check it. Even if he checks who’s viewed it, I’ll only be one of literal thousands, so I doubt he’ll be able to see me as a viewer. He posted a picture of himself on stage last night, and today, he just took a screenshot of listening to 22 by Taylor Swift on Spotify.

He’s saying happy birthday, even if he isn’t.

From: paula (lavapies forever) HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY FAV ESTADOUNIDENSE!!! love you miss you!!! From: giuseppe (lavapies forever) oh!! happy birthday orion!!! how did I end up in this group chat….. ? From: marta (lavapies forever) feliz cumple, orion!! te echo de menos!!! From: ilse (lavapies forever) HAPPY BDAY ORION! ❤️ From: paula (lavapies forever) giu you’re one of the girlies sorry

I haven’t texted the “5SOS groupies” back yet, and am uncertain of whether or not I will, but I do text back my former flatmates (and Giuseppe).

To: lavapies forever muchisimas gracias!!!! miss you all!!! also, have some news for you guys From: ilse (lavapies forever) FINALLY From: paula (lavapies forever) when were you gonna tell us you guys broke up!!!!!! what happened?!?!?!? From: marta (lavapies forever) seriously! how could you not tell us?! but yes what happened we are dying to know the details From: giuseppe (lavapies forever) oh yeah fran asked if i knew anything but obviously i do not To: lavapies forever so… its not so much that i need to tell you about the breakup? i don’t know how else to say it than to just say it so i’m just gonna say it i have leukemia so cal and i broke up i’m actually on my way to the doctor rn to see how my chemotherapy treatments went

When the group chat activity halts, I know they’re now all confused and in shock. My friends aren’t exactly known for not having something to say. I leave the WhatsApp app to give them time to process and go to my regular messages to see who else has reached out.

From: lucas Hey, O. Just popping in to say happy birthday! Sent you a Venmo—have a martini on me. Hope you’re doing okay!

Every other notification is just miscellaneous family members and a few classmates who are just as out of the loop as the general public is on what’s happening in my life. I guess I should probably share something on my social media about what’s going on. I don’t want the fans to know, but I can tell my classmates and people I actually know. I decide I’ll post something later today, once I’ve heard whatever news that the oncologist is about to share with me.

Right when I’m locking my phone, it starts buzzing with an incoming Facetime from Paula. I tell my moms I’ll be on a call before I answer.

“Hey,” I say as her face fills my screen.

“I wish you’d told me sooner,” is how Paula starts the call.

I frown. “It’s kinda hard to say over text. I’m sorry.”

“So call! Orion, what the hell! This is huge and I don’t know why you wouldn’t think we’d want to know!”

I contemplate what to say next. I should be an expert at this after having to break the news Calum. “If it makes you feel better, I didn’t tell Cal until last month.”

Paula’s mouth drops and I can tell she’s about to dwell on this instead of the actual news. “So he broke up with you?!”

“What? No!” I sigh. “No, I broke up with him.”

Her face contorts with confusion and she shakes her head, the idea rattling around in her brain. “You broke up with him?! Because you have cancer?!”

“Please don’t make me talk about this, Pau, it’s all anyone wants to talk about and I’m tired of it.”

“No! We are going to talk about this! You guys are perfect together and you broke up with him in the middle of a life threatening diagnosis? What the fuck, Orion?”

“Can we talk about this tomorrow?” I beg. “It’s my birthday. I promise I’ll call you tomorrow and I’ll let you know how things went today.”

She groans. “Fine, but only because it’s your birthday!”

“Orion,” Mama says, catching my attention. “We’re here.”

I nod and look back to my phone. “¿Hablaremos mañana?”

Pau nods. “Mañana.”

Paula and I hang up then, and I tuck my phone into the pocket on my black sweatpants. We get out of the car and walk to the door of the cancer center, checking in at the desk and going to the waiting room. I feel like I’ve done all of this a million times now, but I haven’t felt this nervous about it in a long time.

They call my name to come back, and we trudge slowly after the nurse and we sit in a sterile exam room that looks just like every other sterile exam room in the world. While we wait for the doctor to come in, my moms and I sit in silence. I don’t think anyone wants to say anything. I know I don’t.

Five minutes of waiting later and then there’s a knock on the door. My new doctor, Dr. Gupta, walks in with his clipboard and the nurse in tow. He takes a seat on the wheeled stool and moves it closer to me so that we’re only about a foot or two apart.

“Good morning,” he says. “And, happy birthday.”

I give him a tense smile. “Thanks.”

I had to come in last week for another biopsy and a full blood panel again to be able to assess the status of my cancer, so today is literally just to talk about the results. They also have me a full body exam to check my lymphnodes and other symptoms. Given the look on Dr. Gupta’s face from the moment he walked in, whatever he’s going to say isn’t good.

“Orion, there isn’t an easy way to say this, so I’m sorry,” he says, off to a horrible start. “The chemo hasn’t made much of a dent in the leukemia, and I’m afraid it’s progressing.”

I look over at my moms who are clenching their jaws and squeezing each other’s hands. I’ll cry if I watch, so I look back to Dr. Gupta.

“You have options, though. We can continue to try to find you a bone marrow donor, and there are a number of trials that are available, we’d just need to transfer you back to LA.”

I shake my head. “I can’t go back to LA.”

“Honey, you can go back—-“

I cut Mom off. “I’m not doing trials. I can’t. I’m sorry, but I’m not doing something else that will make me feel miserable and we don’t even know if it’s going to work. Besides, I’ll get what, maybe a year or two out of it if they do work?”

I look at Dr. Gupta to confirm, and he pulls his mouth into a slight frown.

“There’s no guarantee on timelines or results, but, roughly, given your case, that’s what we’d be looking at.”

“Right, and I’ll get like… a year, a few months if we just stop doing things?”

Dr. Gupta sighs. “Again, we can’t say for certain, but roughly, yes, about a year.”

“Yeah, I’m not doing anything. Can I go now?” I stand up, grabbing my bag.

“Orion, at least hear about what options—“

I spin around, quickly, to face my moms. “I’m not doing anything.”

They look at me with tears in their eyes, begging me to stay and listen, but I don’t want to.

“I want to go home. I want to live comfortably and just have time with people I care about. It doesn’t matter. I’m going to die anyway. It doesn’t even matter, and I’m not going to LA again.”

We have a silent argument with just our eyes before they look to Dr. Gupta.

“Can we have the pamphlets on the trials? We can discuss this at home and let you know.”

Dr. Gupta quickly hands them the stack of brochures he’s had on top of his clipboard. “You don’t have to decide anything today, and please call me if you have any questions.”

I walk out of the room then. I don’t want to dwell in there and I don’t want to dwell on what I’ve just learned. I can’t think about it. Not today. Maybe tomorrow. I just can’t spend my birthday thinking about it all. Today I’m supposed to celebrate my life, not the impending date of my death.

—

We’re having a bonfire in the backyard with my family, Emelia, and Macy — complete with gelatin-free marshmallows and a crock pot full of mulled wine — when my phone starts going crazy. I try to ignore it and just enjoy the night with Emelia and Macy, who are listening to and respecting my wishes not to talk about the news of the day. I promise them we’ll talk about it tomorrow.

My phone has probably buzzed twelve times in the past two minutes, and Emelia ends up taking my phone off the arm of the wooden chair I’m sitting in to look at it, apparently annoyed by all the notifications. She unlocks my phone for herself and her eyes grow wider as she looks at whatever notifications I’ve gotten.

“Jesus,” she whispers, scrolling through whatever it is.

“What is it?” Macy asks before she takes another sip of her hot wine.

“Um…” Em says, trailing off, still staring at my phone’s screen.

I hold my hand out for her to give me my phone back, and she pulls it further away from me, her eyes still glued to the bright screen. I can see it’s a text thread with a lot of texts from the other person.

“Give me my phone,” I instruct, holding my hand closer to her.

“It’s not good, are you sure?”

I roll my eyes. “Em, there’s nothing worse than hearing that your chemotherapy didn’t help your terminal cancer on your birthday. I can handle whatever the hell someone texted me.”

She sighs and hands my phone to me. “I warned you.”

I take in what’s on my screen and feel my stomach start to churn. She’s right. It’s not good.

From: mike-o cliff-o yknow what orion, fuck you i don’t give a fuck that it’s your birthday FUCJ YOU my band, my BEST FRIENDS, aren’t speaking because you couldn’t tell the truth thos is your fault calum won’t even LOOK at ash! howrdare you you had no right to come into our lives and fuck up the one thing that matters most to all of us and then just LEAVEW do you know how depressed cxalum is he doesn’t do anything except show up on stage and drink and whineand moanmb he’s a fucking qwreck and that’s on yuo you play this innocnt sweet act that you’re jsut being kind and whatever bllshit you tell yourself but you and i both know you’re actually a shitty person what kind of person doesn’t tell their partner they have CACNDR and then BROAKS UP WITH THEM over it fuck you. i hope it’s terminal. and i hpoe it sucks.

My eyes start to water as I read through everything, but I try to remember that Michael is clearly very drunk.

“No, he doesn’t get to make you cry on your birthday. Give me that, I’m texting a screenshot of that shit to Crystal.” Emelia holds her hand out for my phone again, but I hug it to my chest.

“No, it’s fine. He doesn’t mean it, and he deserves to be mad.”

“What? Who texted you?” Macy asks from my other side. I sigh and hand my phone to her so she can read it all.

“It’s fine, he’s drunk. If that made him feel better to say that, it’s fine.”

Emelia is fuming next to me and watching as Macy’s face gets more and more concerned while she reads what Mike sent. I don’t want to let them sway me. I don’t care what he sent.

“Holy shit, O, that’s not okay,” Macy says while she hands me my phone.

“It’s fine, I don’t care.”

But I do.

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#5sos #luke hemmings #5 seconds of summer #ashton irwin #calum hood #fanfiction #5sosfam #imagine #fanfic #michael clifford #calum 5sos #calum fanfic #calum fic #calum x ofc #calum x fem!oc #better left unsaid

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callsign-magnolia · 1 year

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Howdy! I'm KayKay, or you can call me Kay! This blog used to be called endofdays56! I've been writing for about 12 years now and it's a passion of mine! This is my masterlist! I currently write for a few TGM characters as well as everyone's favorite cowboy! Blogs without an age will be blocked! Please add a bio or change your photo so you don't look like a bot or you will be blocked on sight! Please also make sure your blog is visible because if it's not, tumblr will not allow me to tag you! If you're not sure how to do that, I made a post here!

If you wish to be put on any of my taglists, feel free to message me, send an ask, comment, reblog, whatever! I'll happily add you to them! Happy reading! 💕

Top Gun Maverick:

Rooster

I Hope You Dance

Imperial

Lost In Translation (Completed)

Love In The Dark

Drabbles:

Feral Rooster

Who's Crying Now

In The Dark Of The Night

Bob

Lost In Translation (Completed)

Right Here Waiting

Blue Velvet (Coming Soon)

Hangman

Undiagnosed

Drabbles:

Chronic

Honey, I'm home!

Surgeries and Worries

Fanboy

Drabbles:

Lego Mania

Family Meetings

Coyote

Drabbles:

Homecoming

Outer Range

Rhett Abbott

Drabbles:

Last Christmas

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schnoo-cone · 1 year

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as readable as a book (1/2)

no this is not canon it's just something i did for funsies

here's the obligatory @kaykay-13 tag B)

#isekai au #xingyun #chongyun #xingqiu #kk13

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hemmohaze · 12 days

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Hot Showers and Cold Bleach.

Warnings: Strong Language and Smut

Authors Note: this has been sitting in my drafts for 2 months now and i’m so proud of this one!! i simply can’t wait for this universe to have its moment. hope you all like it as much as I do!!

——————

April 11th 2019

Kalani already had a strong regret facetiming her mother and father Anna and Marcus back home in Boston as she packed for her trip to Coachella with her longtime boyfriend, Micheal and his bandmates along with Luke’s and Ashton’s girlfriends, Sierra and KayKay.

Calum’s friend Roy is also tagging along so Calum doesn’t feel lonely.

They’ve been together ever since the infamous Bali trip the boys took in 2016. Even though he was secretly subscribed to her youtube channel in 2015.

She knew some of her good friends who were going and gave her a free ticket. Kailani and Micheal originally just wanting to hook up that whole week and never talking again until they realized their feelings and have been together ever since.

Her old youtube footage has obvious footage of the two shamelessly flirting with one another that they look back upon and laugh.

She held up one blue bikini and one red one and quickly shoved them in her bag until her mother’s voice rang through.

“What the hell are those pieces of fabric??” She demanded.

“‘My bathing suits?” She shrugged walking over to her vanity to pack her makeup in her travel bag.

“Those are not a bathing suits. That’s two rags colored in dye.” She said making her brunette haired daughter chuckle and roll her eyes.

“Mom, no one at Coachella is gonna see my birthday suit.” She responded looking at her mom’s disgusted face on the MacBook screen.

“Well other than Micheal!!” Her dad’s voice interrupted her trying to figure out what shade of foundation to bring. She never knew how tan she’d get in the hot sun and it would be a monstrosity if she posted on YouTube or Instagram and her face was 4 shades darker than her whole body.

“Shut up.” She seethed as she packed a Fenty Bottle and Makeup Forever bottle. ‘Praying these are right’ She said a silent prayer.

Anna waved noticing Michel standing in the doorway holding Southy in his arms with Moose and her cocker spaniel, Sadie trailing behind him. Kalani turned around seeing him, her smile growing as she sees her bleach blonde boyfriend already smiling at her.

“You’re like the cheshire cat. How did I not hear you.” She smiled at her boyfriend who shrugged taking a seat on their shared bed, the dogs jumping on her pillow, taking in her scent that was all thanks to her Valentino perfume she was gifted for their 1 year anniversary last year.

“Hi Mr and Mrs Ford” Micheal waved with Southy’s paw making Kalani smile.

“Micheal honey you can call me Anna. I’ve told you this for almost 2 years now. The whole Mrs thing makes me feel older than I am.”

“If the shoe fits then wear it.” Kalani joked as her mother showed her the bird. “Wait before we go Michael-“ Her parents started.

“Take care of this little firecracker. Don’t let her drink too much Pink Whitney or drink too much for that matter.” Anna said making Kalani stick her tounge out in trauma and disgust. She drank it once her senior year of high school after prom party and definitely got alcohol poisoning. She was throwing up everything she ate in the past three days the next morning. They said their goodbyes and hung up.

“Okay, so I’m gonna wear this Sweetener baby tee with my black mini skirt and these white cowgirl boots from Romwe to see Ariana Grande on Sunday.” She slipped the boots on to make sure she could walk in them and wouldn’t be too uncomfortable. Thinking she’ll just wear two pairs of nike socks just in case her feet start to blister.

“And then when we go see DJ Snake. Should I wear this white off the shoulder with these jeans or this oversized blue shirt and these denim shorts?” She showed both options to Micheal as he looked at Moose to make her decide.

“Moose go help mommy pick her outfit.” He urged to the fluffy dog who walked over to her mom, just wanting cuddles and not caring about the clothes.

“Micheal,” She whined holding the outfits lower. “I need your answer seriously. I love you so much though Moose Moose.” As she petted Moose on the belly. She heard Sadie and Southy whine and she smiled at the spoiled puppies.

“You three are too spoiled. Who’s to blame?”

“Not me. It’s your fault.”

“Sureee.”

“Are we still seeing Bad Bunny on Saturday?” Micheal questioned with a raised eyebrow. Ever since Kalani introduced him to Spanish music, it’s all hes been listening to. He even got Calum on board with it.

“Duh of course we are. Oh and I got the whole house situation figured out. We overbooked according to them even though I know we didn’t. So I called this morning after I finished editing my video. Those dumbasses apologized even though I clearly said it was going to be 9 people and 3 dogs. Can people not listen nowadays.” She stated sitting on his lap tracing one long nail against his anchor tattoo once she finished packing for the day. She decided she’ll finish tomorrow morning before they leave.

She ran her white acrylic nails through his fringe, the bleach was slowly growing out so you could see his natural brown roots. “We need to dye this again Mikey. You can see your roots growing back.”

He groaned loudly in her boobs as she chuckled at his silliness. “Ugh, your tits are comfortable.” He commented, his voice coming out muffled.

She laughed as she looked down at him. “Hm I’ve heard that before by someone who goes by the name of Micheal Clifford.”

“He seems like a man who knows his stuff.” He said thinking about the number of times they’ve been in this position when he’d be on top of her while shes a moaning mess for him.

“But we could do your hair now so you can have a fresh fringe for Coachella.” She intertwined their hands as he rubbed her thumb.

“Shower?” She asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Shower.” He confirmed.

*****

Kalani and Micheal stood underneath the warm shower water as she lathered some sort of deep conditioner with keratin and special oil designed for faux blondes in his hair before she could bleach it again if she wanted to make sure it was completely clean and not streaky.

“The bottle said to wait 5 minutes before you can wash it out.” She repeated the instructions on the purple bottle.

His hands wandered down her hips and close to her ass as she gave him a pointed look. “Thats not what we’re here for Mr. Later maybe.” She pointed her finger at his chest

“You couldd wash my hair since I was such a good girlfriend by washing yours and about to help you bleach it.” She batted her eyelashes at him who playfully rolled his eyes before turning Kalani back facing him and lathering shampoo to wash her curls slowly and carefully.

Small talk was the only thing that you could hear in the bathroom other than the water.

They washed out all the product out of his hair and hers before wrapping herself in a warm towel while Micheal stepped out of the bathroom to grab the hair dye and another towel. He’s been dying his hair ever since he was 16. He would consider himself a pro but he likes when Kalani does it for him.

She grabbed the muscle shirt off of the counter that she stole from Micheal and her panties while she squeezed the water out her hair and threw in some deep hair mask to slick her hair back in a curly bun.

Micheal rolled the chair in front of the mirror and placed the dye in a bowl as Kalani read the instructions.

She placed some gloves on for protection and got to bleaching his hair. “This may burn.” She warned him as he was mindlessly scrolling through Twitter when she was done.

“I’ve dyed my hair probably 20 times in my life. Trust me it’s fine. I’m pretty much immune to the burning sensation now.” He joked.

*****

After an hour of the smell of bleach and Kalani and Micheal’s laugh, they were finally in bed watching some episodes Chicago Fire that they’ve been missing.

She had one leg up and the other across his lap as he stroked the inside of her thigh making her bite her lip as to make it seem like his fingers brushing across her thighs didn’t have a affect on her. As it very well did because of how she felt the dampness pool in her black Calvin Kiln thong.

“If you wanna eat my pussy all you have to do is ask.” She finally spoke up during a boring scene in the show.

“I was waiting on those very words.” He said with a cheeky smile.

With that Micheal maneuvered himself to be in her thighs, facing her panties. He licked his lips in anticipation and spread her legs apart.

Kalani whined softly as he was teasing her clit through the outside of her panties. “Please Mikey.” Her doe eyes silently begged him.

He tugged them down her smooth legs and tossed them somewhere behind him as he was face to face with her swollen clit as his eyes got wider in adoration.

“Shit your pussy is so pretty my love. Always has been.” He kissed the insides of her thighs as she giggled. “Thank you baby.”

With one lick, she was a moaning mess for him. He was making eye contact with her and every time she wouldn’t look at him he would go slower with eating her out. It wasn’t long before she started pulling on his hair as he was sucking on her clit making her eyes roll back in pleasure.

“That feel good baby?,” He asked huskily as she could visibly see her own wetness on his face.

His beard kept scratching her thighs as she sighed in love. “Fuck it feels so good.”

With his middle and ring finger he started to slowly finger her while sucking on her clit, her hips jutting up every time he curled his fingers against her sweet spot.

“Shit I’m gonna come.” She panted. She pushed his head deeper into her trying to get more of his mouth.

“C’mon you can come whenever you want. Whenever you fucking want.” He spoke, the vibrations sending her over the edge.

She screamed his name in pure ecstasy multiple times.

“Let it out baby. I know I knooww. I got ya I got ya.” He spoke softly.

He pulled his fingers out of her and slowly licked her clean, avoiding her clit as he knew it was too sensitive. He gave her clit one last kiss before laying back next to her.

“I love you.” She stretched over her to peck his lips repeatedly. They kissed for what seemed like hours.

“I love you so much more. I can’t wait to fuck the shit out of you at Coachella. To a weekend of music, bonding, and amazing sex.” He said excitedly running his hands over her ass.

“How can a sentence that dirty sound so wonderful coming from you?” She questioned.

“Talent honey.”

“And this weekend to spending time with your band members and me spending girl time! she playfully hit his tattooed arm as they both went into a deep sleep tangled together.

#5sos fanfic #micheal clifford smut #luke hemmings #micheal clifford #5sos #ashton irwin #calum hood #micheal 5sos #micheal clifford fanfic #micheal clifford imagine

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fandomindulgences · 1 year

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Tagged by @xmasuchii !!

Top 5 Songs

I’m Alive by Aaron Tveit

I See You by MIKA

New Genesis by Ado

Praying by Kesha

My Frankenstein by Kody Kavitha

Following Masu’s example and pulling these from my “On Repeat” playlist on Spotify! I’m actually surprised that some of these are as high on the list as they are, I definitely listen to other songs WAY more overall! I guess these were just the Most Recent of Recent listens, like, within the last week or two??

I tag @kaykay-celeste and @piranhebula, if y’all wanna do it!

#I was tAGGED #songs #tag memes

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lashton-is-my-drug · 2 years

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5SOS “Older” promo observations

September 7, 2022 - Today the new 5SOS song “Older” drops, Ashton reposts only the promo videos with Luke and doesn’t include any tags. This morning he also posts a Peter Gabriel song “Sledgehammer” (which albeit an iconic song with great musicality) which is about sex and the lyrics are loaded with phallic symbols. The title of the song and various other references throughout it are a euphemism to the male genitalia.

Luke’s posts regarding “Older”. Posts clips of acoustic Luke only performing the song. Only reposts the videos (which don’t include her voice anywhere) and doesn’t tag her anywhere.

Compared to Michael, who has pushed the stunts numerous times and has brought up the stunts even when not asked about during interviews, includes S in his tags. Luke, Ash, or Cal don’t tag her in anything. The videos are of Luke singing acoustically by himself, which is so pretty on its own merit, and full on I wish that was the version we got on the album. S’s voice just wasn’t necessary, imo. The boys Like Sierra’s ig post but none of them put it to their own ig stories. There’s so much shade in this song drop!

Crystal (Michael’s supposed wife) is the reason Sierra was brought into the picture. Crystal’s profession is PR. She is the one who setup Luke with Sierra, Ashton with Kaykay (also applies with Marg, no longer narratively together yet she still stays friends with Ash’s work friends, this is weird because typically when you breakup with someone they don’t stay in your friend connections, which supports those whole “relationships” were a PR/bearding stunts contracts. They seem to stay connected with the other women because it’s all business, albeit toxic business.).

Then Sierra on HER OWN IG ACCT makes a post trying to convince us that this is her choosing to “stay behind the scenes” and letting the fans use a story about how Michael told them to finish a song that she and Luke had started on a voice note of Luke’s (which Luke had shared as a joke *hint hint* meaning he didn’t feel much of an emotional connection attachment to it) Luke shared it as a joke and now she’s narratively putting it across as a very meaningful Lierra love song. HONEY. Stop trying to make fetch happen 😂

She’s saying she stopped pursuing an artist career (doesn’t discount the amount she has used Luke’s career as solo and with 5sos for a paycheck and PR for herself), yet since she was put together with Luke, she has written and/or appeared on EVERY RECORD LUKE IS ON INCLUDING HIS SOLO. The engagement was announced at the same time his solo record was announced (even though supposedly it had happened months before. Why wait? Oh yes…. The PR for herself! Use the attention for his projects to gain attention to yourself.)

S making this type of statement for this song sounds so disingenuous. She’s insisting she wants to stay Behind The Scenes yet she’s one of the songwriters and her airy vocals are mixed so high in the track that hers pretty much overshadow Luke’s. The title of the song is “Older (featuring Sierra Deaton)”. If you want to stay bts, this doesn’t look like how you would do it. This is such irony. And again, her narrative of the song uses the PR relationship for attention.

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