#kaz changed her bandages

[hauntedfictionland]

Being their emotional support person —

☾︎✰❛❀ Shadow and bone characters x gn!reader

Includes/warnings: light mentions of PTSD, injuries, slightly stalkerish behaviours and implied romance.

🪐notes: i sort of recently got into Shadow and Bone and oh boy I'm absolutely in love, the plotlines, music, and characters are so beautifully done. I do truly hope that Netflix renews it back.

— I. KAZ BREAKER

(♥︎^⁠_^♥︎)

You and Kaz went back quite a long time as far back as the time his brother died with his innocence. You went through that together, from the sidelines you watched him change drastically, grow into a man whose name was rather feared than loved.

Kaz doesn't admit it, but he relies on you a lot. He knows the harshness he's put upon you everyday isn't new by now, but still unwelcomed. It stings him. You almost get treated the same as any other crow, if not for the times where you'd hold his upper arm in an act of comfort when needed.

And he'd let you. ♡

You're not the most significant part of the group, or the strongly important. But you can be useful enough in his words to ‘stay’, definitely not because Kaz wants you there by his side as he's always had most of his life.

Or so what he insists.

He looks upon you along with every plan of heists, a wordless query of help. It does not look like it, but your opinions and suggestions matter to him more than you'll ever know.

And when you need a favor, he's all yours. Jesper would sometimes find him doing questionable things for a man like Kaz's taste, when he'd ask it always goes a simple “Y/N asked for this”.

When Kaz is faced with his past, especially if without black gloves he has used as a shield—he won't come to you. The most would be handing his gloves back.

But after the worst is gone, he'll slowly reach out to you. Sitting beside you, head leaning on your shoulder. That is the moment he wants the most, support to get back to the daily life.

He needs you.

Needing anything is a weakness surely but he truly never considered you his, without you he'd actually fall apart with the absence of the power to get back again. You're his strength. His support, his person.

You're his, and he's yours.

— II. INEJ GHAFA

(♥︎^⁠_^♥︎)

Inej doesn't really feel comfortable relying on a lot of people, anyone for that matter. Yet when it comes to you it almost seems so effortless. Perhaps that's the effect you have on her.

Kaz brought you in a while ago when he was in desperate need of a healer.

When she saw you the first time, you seemed shy to the point of not even being able to hold eye contact. However as time slowly passed on you spend way more time with Inej than anyone else as she tended to get herself in all sorts of trouble.

Inej would find herself looking at you often, wondering how the alignment of your lips to the sharpness of jaw could ever be so perfect.

She started to let a few things of her past out here and there while you'd bandage her, careful enough to never reach the tip of the surface.

Bit by bit, it turned into a habit. Only now she would come to you herself and open up even when there was no scar or injury on her.

Something about the way you listened so tentatively with soft eyes that held no judgement, your words which grasped onto the feelings she couldn't seem to comprehend and your affection, all of it pulled her in.

And she could not let go.

Sometimes Inej feels a bit guilty, how you're always there yet she isn't. She wants to know about you, your interests, your fears, your life. And she wants to help. In that sense she feels worse.

She's the wraith, she's never been scared of anyone. Yet Inej feels herself becoming powerless the moment she looks at you.

And that'll be the death of her.

— III. ALECSANDER KIRIGAN

(♥︎^⁠_^♥︎)

Much like Kaz, Kirigan is not the most reliable at showing affection. But he does know very clearly the way you've helped him will not go unnoticed or unappreciated.

Rather unexpectedly, even as a grisha on his team you've somehow managed to slip into the cracks of his facade. The demeanor he held.

After Alina fled, he wasn't in the calmest mind. And sensing you just hold him without a single word, a hand soothing his shoulder with a wave of your magic spreading around him. He in the longest while felt peace alongside tranquillity in just a few minutes.

With him in your arms, you gave him a sense of assurance without ever putting them into words.

Kirigan keeps you absolutely spoiled. He tells the extravagant jewelries and fancy wines are gestures of reward for your exertion which he'd give to anyone who'll work just as hard. Except that in truth he feels he owes you a great deal whenever his emotional hard times are mended because of you.

And it's his way of showing the utmost appreciation, almost affection you've placed in his heart for you.

The fact that you don't judge or mock, even think of him as ‘weak’ for not being the powerful general everyone sought out to be has him in a chokehold.

He thinks about you, and every one of your encounters has him thinking for weeks. Each and single one. Soley, it does come off as any surprise when Alecsander sets at least one grisha protector to watch you. Your safety is his utmost priority and even perhaps to know a little details about you and the people you talk with.

Which you don't need to know about whatsoever.

The time he revealed his true self to you, he was very much afraid that was the way he'll lose you. You'd see the monster his mother claims him to be and run far away. But instead when you embraced his dark side with a glint in your eyes, he knew you had him whipped in a tight hold.

— IV. ALINA STARKOV

(♥︎^⁠_^♥︎)

You first saw Alina when Zoya sent her flying across the field. Rather before that, eyes stealing glances on you.

She knew who you were, the great earth summoner. And as per who she was, Alina felt inclined to meet you. Her newly found peers brought her upon you, and when you turned to face her, Alina was quite at a loss for words.

Wonderstruck.

You seemed far much greater than she imagined, and oh she had a lot to learn from you.

Alina found you on many occasions, tried to as best she could. Questions about your powers, her powers, and secrets of the little palace. You gave them all, heart smiling fondly at her genuine curiosity.

You'd discover yourself sitting beside her, on the floor with backs leaning against the wooden bookshelves. Walks around the little palace or the library, you were growing much closer with her as the days passed.

Sometimes a word or two would slip out of her missing a certain Mal, and the camp of the first army. She would close them, a bit scared of your thoughts that is before you assure her. That whatever is was held in her heart, she could absolutely come to you.

And came she did.

You and her would spend hours under the night sky, hearing her stories of the orphanage—worries she held about herself, and Mal. Either way Alina was sure you were her answer.

The way you'd given her a tiny beam of grin, hands grazing over hers. Talking conclusions she could barely listen when her focus was your lips. A connection she felt that was electrifying.

Alina believed it was because of your power as the Earth, and her's as the Sun summoner. However in that, a deeper part of her knew something was more than that.

A single time someone referred you as her Earth summoner, the mere prospect of that—even when she knew the other meant it in no harm, drove her crazy.

The time after you comforted her about the troubles she held about Mal, sincere yet bittersweet smile on your lips. You knew she had feelings for the boy, a thought that made your gut wrench for a reason you didn't acknowledge.

When you asked her that, Alina's eyes gazed at yours before she pulled her lips on yours in return so softly you could only hum.

You were hers alright.

#shadow and bone #kaz brekker #kaz brekker x reader #inej ghafa #kaz x reader #kaz x inej #inej ghafa x reader #jesper fahey #jesper fahey x reader #the darkling #jesper x wylan #alina starkov #alina starkov x reader #the darkling x reader #the darkling x alina #s&b #nina zenik #general kirigan #general kirigan x reader #nina zenik x reader #the six of crows #kanej

[manikas-whims]

Things we can still get in a possible SoC Spin-off

now that i'm done ranting about the things that annoyed me, lets talk about this.

1: Some light on Inej's backstory, the abuse and exploitation she suffered, her own struggles with touch, her vulnerable side, her fun side especially when she's around Jesper and Nina, her fears and how she rises above them. According to this article by tvguide, showrunner Eric Heisserer states that a script has already been written about her incorporation back into the Dregs. Let's just hope they stop reducing Inej's personality to a mere “knife wife” and “girlboss” , and address her actual depth.

2: Tante Heleen's return! Since we never actually see her body onscreen and her death is merely mentioned twice and shrugged off, I'm hoping she's alive and that the production team is keeping her for the spin-off. She's an integral part of Inej's character arc.

3: The Dregs. I wanna see Rotty, Specht, Anika, Pim, Per Haskell, Big Bolliger and the rest of the bunch. Also Dime Lions, Razorgulls, The Liddies, and other prominent gangs. And a shot of the entire Merchant Council would be nice.

4: Since Inej will return and Matthias is still in Hellgate, we'll get the entire Hellgate breakout and Ice Court Heist. (I'm assuming during Matthias's breakout, Pekka Rollins will also manage to escape from Hellgate 🤔) So we can still have the entire book 1 ending at Vellgeluk where Wylan's face has been tailored and Inej gets captured by Van Eck.

5: Crooked Kingdom plotline till they rescue Inej— Kaz throwing off a rapist from the lighthouse after gaining intel, Kaz threatening a little girl, Jesper and Wylan going to receive Colm Fahey and the whole “people pointing guns at each other is basically a handshake” 😂, Nina's struggles with Parem and Matthias trying his best to be there for her, the iconic Kanej reunion at Goedmedbridge,..

I'm not sure how they'll proceed after retrieving Inej, because alot has already been adapted in this season of SaB. But we'll still have the showdown against Van Eck. Not sure what they'll replace the plague thing with but we'll see..

6: Wylan's backstory! Aside from Inej, we also have Wylan's heart wrenching backstory and we'll witness it all. His early life, the moment he lost his mother and his world became gray, his escape from the men who try to kill him, his realization that they were sent by his own father, his struggles with it all, his conflict with being a good person and working with criminals, his reunion with his very alive mother and Jesper being there for him, and so much more..

7: Kuwei! I'm a big fan of this sassy boy. He absolutely hates having to be with Crows and he chooses not to use their language simply so he can avoid conversations with them 😭 We'll see him cause conflict in Wesper's relationship but also slowly accepting and being thankful of the Crows. And I really hope, the show adds a sort of camaraderie between him and Wylan too. But despite it all, I still wanna see Wylan threaten to drown him 😆

8: The Bathroom Scene ♡ If we take into consideration the wound cleaning moment in season 2 of SaB, its a lot different from the bathroom scene. For starters, they're on Black Veil and not an actual bathroom, and Kaz didn't actually tie any bandages for her. Most importantly, the neck kiss didn't happen. So bathroom scene can still happen and it can serve as a beautiful callback and a parallel to this scene in season 2.

9: Kaz can still find Inej's parents, meet them and well, gift her a ship. Wylan and Jesper can still have their happily ever after, living at the Van Eck Mansion.

10: Since they've made so many changes to the source, can they fucking not kill off Matthias and let him and Nina have their happily ever after too? Like they can act as delegates for Ravka and Fjerda 🤔 Or they can help Hanne claim the Fjerdan throne 🤔 Anything aside from killing him off please.

if you guys have something to add or correct me on, please do so in replies/reblogs ☺

#six of crows #kaz brekker #inej ghafa #jesper fahey #wylan van eck #matthias helvar #nina zenik #kanej #wesper #helnik #crooked kingdom #freddy carter #amita suman #kit young #jack wolfe #calahan skogman #danielle galligan #grishaverse

[in-my-feels-probably]

if you could please do something with inej x reader, maybe reader taking care of inej. thanks and have a great day!

Rest and Relaxation

Request: if you could please do something with inej x reader, maybe reader taking care of inej. thanks and have a great day!

Hi! This is my first time writing for Inej, so bear with me while I try and figure out the best way to write her character. Sorry if it’s a little rusty, and sorry for the wait. I love her character so much, thank you for sending this request in. I hope you enjoy it!

(Warnings: none? let me know if i missed anything)

—

You marched into Kaz’s office before closing the door, not stopping your advance until you were leaning over his desk, your hands pointedly resting on top of it. You cleared your throat, impatiently tapping your foot on the floor. 

“Hello, Y/N,” Kaz said without looking up from his papers. “I seem to remember a door knocker being installed quite some time ago on that door. Use it.”

You ignored his reprimand, intent on doing what you came to do. “Must you send my girl out so late? She should have been back by now.”

Kaz sighed, putting his papers down to look up at you. “It’s her job. Inej sees her duties through to the end, no matter how long it takes her.”

“Why send her alone? You could have asked me to go.”

“You’d just distract her,” Kaz argued, leaning back in his chair. “We all have our roles to play, Y/N. The Wraith acts alone. You should know that by now.”

You let out a frustrated sigh, fear written on your face. “I don’t like her being alone this late, Kaz. I wish you’d understand that.”

Kaz nodded, standing to open his window. “She isn’t in any danger. You have my word. I wouldn’t send her into peril alone. She’s just looking into a matter for me. Sticking to rooftops and window ledges.”

“You better be right,” you said anxiously.

“I always am,” he mused, and suddenly, Inej was climbing in through the window. “See?”

“Inej,” you sighed in relief, your shoulders relaxing. “I was beginning to worry.”

“Why?” She asked, taking your hands as you helped her hop down to the floor. 

“It seems Y/N has begun to question my confidence,” Kaz said, already back at his desk as he looked over his papers. 

You rolled your eyes, pulling Inej out of Kaz’s office. “Only when it’s regarding my girl. Someone has to. She can report to you later?”

Kaz sighed, waving you off. “Go ahead. I know you won’t be able to focus if I ask you to stay, anyway.”

You quickly thanked him, pulling Inej out of Kaz’s office before he could change his mind. You whisked her away to her room, determined to give her a night off where she didn’t have to focus on her duties. You opened the door to an already turned down bed, and a hot bath, sending steam wafting towards you. 

“What’s this?” She asked, squeezing your hand in hers. 

“You deserve a good night's rest,” you said, giving her a smile as you closed the door behind you. “Go ahead, darling. I’ll come back in a bit. Call for me if you need me.”

“You didn’t have to do this,” she murmured, beginning to remove her knives from her waistband.

“You’ve been rubbing the back of your neck, like it hurts. And I’ve seen the bandages you’ve been sneaking past me for your feet. I’ll have to tell Kaz to lay off with the rooftop climbs for a bit.”

Inej sighed, shaking her head. “It’s my job, Y/N. I’ll do it properly.”

“I don’t doubt that,” you smiled, cupping her cheek. “I can’t force you to rest…but, please. Just for tonight. If not for yourself, then for me.”

Inej placed her hand over yours, pressing it into her cheek. “Fine. For you.”

You grinned, pleased with yourself and her answer. “Enjoy your bath, darling. I’ll be back soon. Maybe I’ll ask Kaz to consider getting you a nice new pair of shoes while I’m gone.”

“Y/N,” she groaned, and you laughed, shaking your head. 

“I’m kidding, love. I’ll leave him be, and I’ll leave you be so you can relax. See you in a bit,” you smiled, letting yourself out. 

—

You returned to your room after a bit with a tray in your hands, nudging open the door with your foot just enough so Inej could hear you. 

“Sorry, my hands are full. Can I come in?”

“Yes,” you heard Inej say, and you entered, setting the tray down on a side table. 

Inej was sitting in a chair by the window, her hair down as it fell around her shoulders. You smiled, closing the door behind you. You approached her slowly, laying a hand on her shoulder. 

“You’re very pretty, you know that? I don’t tell you that nearly enough.”

She smiled, tilting her head back to look up at you. You leaned down, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. As she looked back forward, you ran your fingers through her hair, smoothing out any knots you found. 

“Having trouble?” She mused, making you chuckle. 

“No,” you replied, continuing to run your fingers through her hair. “Give me a minute. You have a lot of hair.”

“I can just braid it—”

“No! I can handle this, thank you very much. You just sit there and look pretty, alright?”

Inej smiled, leaning her head back so it rested against your stomach. “Alright, my love.”

—

A/N - Hi! Sorry this is a little short, and I hope it’s not out of character. Inej is a bit hard to write for. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this :)

#inej ghafa #inej ghafa x reader #inej ghafa imagine #six of crows #six of crows x reader #six of crows imagine #shadow and bone #shadow and bone imagine #shadow and bone x reader #grishaverse x reader #grishaverse imagine #grishaverse #in my feels probably

[fantastic-nonsense]

It's kind of funny that the "I will have you without armor or I will not have you at all" line is as much about Inej as it is about Kaz in the end

Because there Kaz is, actually being emotionally honest for the first time in their whole friendship and flat-out saying he wants her (that he wants her to stay with him), but Inej doesn't trust his words. She loves him, but her own happiness and healing comes first and she doesn't think he's ready to give her what she needs out of a relationship.

And to her credit, she's right. He's not ready (which I've discussed a little bit before here); but neither is she in that moment. Kaz may be avoiding a solid 95% of Inej's attempts to get him to be truthful about his thoughts and feelings with her during Six of Crows, but she doesn't believe him even when he is truthful. So she throws her own armor up in that scene, and it doesn't truly come down until Crooked Kingdom's epilogue chapters.

We all talk a lot about Kaz's actions during CK and how he does everything in his power to ensure Inej has the ability and freedom to walk out of his life forever if she wants. But even after he saves her from Van Eck, even after the "if I couldn't walk, I would crawl to you" conversation, even after the net, even after the the Bathroom Scene and her paid-off indenture and keeping her at his side when he confronts Pekka, Inej still doubts him to the point where she goes to the harbor prepared to do just that:

Kaz had changed. The net. Paying her contract. She could still feel the faint touch of his lips on her skin, his bare hands fumbling with the knots of her bandages. Inej had seen the scant glimmer of what he might become if he let himself. She couldn’t bear to see him dressed in armor once more, buttoned back into his immaculate suits and cold demeanor. She wouldn’t listen to him talk as if the Ice Court and everything that came after had been just another job, another score, another bit of advantage to be gained. But she wouldn’t ignore his note. It was time to put an end to this thing that had never had a chance to begin. She’d tell him what she’d heard about Pekka, offer to share some of her routes and hiding spots with Roeder. It would be over. She turned down the light, and after a long while, she fell asleep with the note clutched in her hand. -Ch. 44, Crooked Kingdom

She clings to his final letter like a love-struck teenager but puts on a brave face and walks to the harbor the next morning ready to "put an end to this thing that had never had a chance to begin."

But Kaz surprises her by coming to the harbor with bared hands and the Wraith as an offering, and Inej realizes that her own fear and trauma and trust issues have been holding her back from seeing that his progress is real and permanent. He's now the one reaching out, and she's the one backing away in fear of what pursuing a relationship with him would mean. She states during this scene that she "would fight for him, but she could not heal him. She would not waste her life trying" without acknowledging that she's actively pulling away from the possibility of fighting in that moment. Her armor is what's getting in the way now, not his.

And it's fascinating, because her words come from an incredibly valid and understandable place! She's not responsible for Kaz's trauma or for making sure he heals; she's got enough of her own healing to do without taking on the responsibility of dealing with his as well. And like Kaz notes during the "I would come for you" scene, she's right to be wary of opening herself up to him given his previous behavior. She's technically setting an incredibly healthy relationship boundary here, and that should be acknowledged! It's something she should believe!

However, it's important to realize that healthy boundaries can become unhealthy boundaries when you're leaning on them as a coping mechanism instead of using them as an actual boundary...which is what Inej is doing here. She says she's willing to fight for him and their relationship, but in reality she's falling back on behaviors that (like Kaz's) helped her survive Ketterdam but don't necessarily help her create healthy relationships with other people:

When Kaz had brought her to the Slat, he’d warned her that he wouldn’t be able to watch out for her, that she’d have to fend for herself, and she had. It would have been easy enough to turn away when they called her names or sidled up to ask for a cuddle, but do that and soon it was a hand up your blouse or a try at you against a wall. So she’d let no insult or innuendo slide. She’d always struck first and struck hard. Sometimes she even cut them up a bit. It was fatiguing, but nothing was sacred to the Kerch except trade, so she’d gone out of her way to make the risk much higher than the reward when it came to disrespecting her. -Ch. 4, Six of Crows

She went to the harbor ready to strike first and hard only to have the rug pulled out from under her, because Kaz revealing the Wraith helps Inej realize that she's not actually setting a healthy boundary here: she's just closing herself off from him. So she takes a leap of faith, cracks her armor open, and offers him the same vulnerability in return: she tells him she'll come back, invites him to work with her to take down the slave trade, and offers him her hand. And he takes it.

It takes until that moment for Kaz and Inej to truly understand how determined the other is to fight for the possibility of a future together. Inej still doubted that Kaz cared for her enough to be vulnerable around her and trust her with himself; Kaz still doubted Inej cared for him enough to ever come back once she had the opportunity to leave. But then she offers a partnership and her hand. And he accepts both, and Inej acknowledges it as the promise it is.

And when she first sees her parents? That's when Inej's walls finally come completely crumbling down:

Had she really thought the world didn’t change? She was a fool. The world was made of miracles, unexpected earthquakes, storms that came from nowhere and might reshape a continent. The boy beside her. The future before her. Anything was possible. -Ch. 44, Crooked Kingdom

They both need time and space to work on healing themselves, and it's probably going to take awhile. But they've already taken the first steps to dismantle the armor that's kept them both safe and untouchable in the Barrel, and they're also both actively broadcasting that they're willing to put effort into a potential relationship...and that open and visible reciprocity makes all the difference. They've been getting their communication wires crossed since the Ferolind, and it's only at the harbor that they're both able to see and accept what the other is offering: a path forward, together, with knives drawn and pistols blazing.

#KANEJ META PART THREE! #I'm on a roll #kanej #six of crows #kaz brekker #inej ghafa #long post #soc meta #also I will make this fandom acknowledge that Kaz and Inej promised to be PARTNERS in Inej's crusade or die trying lol #otp: on the seas and in the city

[serpentthecrow]

Queen of thieves 4

chapter 4: a shadow amongst shadows

====================================

" Thats a very long story. One that we absolutelly dont have time for"

Getting up from the ground, I am trying to remain calm and collected, while burning up in panic on the inside.

What was done is done. Kaz is simply not the only protective sibling under the crooked roof of the Slat, and I was not about to keep watching the water drenching his shirt and climbing up all the way up to his neck in the hold of Pekka's goons.

"you are a ..." "are you alright?" I ask him, effectively changing the topic, even if I will never get an answer.

I am possibly the only living person that Kaz told his story to. He build walls of steel around himself and locked his past in a box with a lock only he is able to pick.

However, watching him, sitting on that floor while breathing heavily through his mouth, tears in his eyes, turning his head to look at the window as if to hide the streaks running down his cheeks, as if they could grow wings and fly out of it, he looked his age; like the childhood that was forced to end, oh, so early was coming back to haunt him, leaning onto his shoulders for comfort, only to find them as cold as stone. He looked vulnerable and weak, all while maintaining an almost bored expression, perfected through the years. As I looked at him, I saw something that he would kill me for seeing. He looked like a Rietveld boy. A child trying to find his way around in the big evil world.

I have seen Kaz Rietveld in my brother before. The night he told me about Jordie.

I was laying on a bed with a bandaged shoulder, having barely survived a stab wound. That night I saw a nine year old boy in Kaz's eyes; the eyes that looked like they lived for thousands of years, exhausted by their immortal burden of existence.

The boy was pale, thin, the plague eating any slivers of fat on his tired bones. He was terrified, for the lack of a better word. He was cold, the waves freezing his muscles. He could feel the decaying, bloated flesh of his brothers body on the skin of his hands as it carried him to the shore, it's, now, familiar coldness that would continue to haunt him for years.

I could see the sea of corpses through his dark orbs, a pile of rotten meat and exposed bones, waiting to be burned. I saw the crows, circling above it all, craving a meal in the cold hostile weather that ruled ashore, only to deem it worthless, flying back to the centre of the city, seeking a child who has read way too many stories and leaves seeds on their windowsill for the phoenixes to eat. Kaz said his mother was Ketterdam, yet I believe she merely adopted him, when Revenge birthed him in the harbor. Without her, The bastard of the Barrel wouldn't be born.

And then, with an inaudible snap of bony fingers, Kaz Brekker came back, no doubt to internally scold his other self while saying something along the lines of 'emotions are a weakness in the Barrel'.

Dirtyhands got off the ground, running his gloved hands along his vest, brushing the dust off of it. He wasted no time getting out the door of his office, sliding down the stairs almost effortlessly, despite the innevitable pain in his bad knee after being kicked in it and forced to kneel on the hard wooden floor.

Down at the bar sat Jesper, ordering two shots for himself at once, seeing as it was a busy night in the club, not wanting to disturb the observant bartender who had to tend to ther customers than the zemeni. The shots were served to him as soon as Kaz strolled down the last step, with me hot on his heels. As we both took hold of the sharpshooters shot glasses before he could reach for one himself, jesper looked at us confused at our disheveled appearances and betrayal at the loss of his precious alcohol.

Only a handful of words were exchanged before we were heading out again, minds set on finding the conductor.

During our walk however, the one who spoke up was Jesper, demanding we get a demo man. I swear that man as a type. I could as well see him marrying someone like that, someone he could cause chaos with by blowing things up all the time.

The conductor indeed was found in the right moment. After Inej's failed attempt to ruin Kaz's face -a second attempt of that sort in a single night- and a bit of good old threathening, the conductor volunteered to help us.

___________

It was a very bad idea to let Jesper fetch the alabaster coal on his own.

The worst idea Kaz ever had, I'm sure. His decision to get the goat, Milo as Jesper later affectionately named it, evens it out though, for it was incredibly hillairious observing Kaz with goat under his arm and a scowl on his face. I will never tell him that the he left a trail of goat droppings behind him as he carried Milo through the city streets.

Now we were sitting in the conductor's... train of sorts, while Jesper was panicking when he was told there are gaps in the rails. Inej was quietly praying to her saints when suddenly, all sound seemed to die out. It was very dark, cold and hostile silence.

We entered the fold.

My friends who sat with me in the little metal cube did not hear anything for the next many minutes, but my head was bustling with sounds, which I realized were voices. With horror, I realized I hear crying, yelling, laughing, talking and even singing of thousands of voices. They were all there.

I heard them all.

===============================

A/n: YAAY I MADE IT!! It's almost six am I'm so done. It's (self established) writing weekend, so I will try to get as much done this weekend and until Thursday, because I will probably not have time to write during the week in England. Of course, feel free to send in requests; I will read them all and write them, eventually. I have three requests in progress rn so those are the things that will come out in the following days. As always, feedback in form of likes/reblogs/comments is HIGHLY appreciated. Let me know if you liked this chapter!!! If you'd like to requests something, my requests are open, please read my pinned post before requesting, there you'll find rules but also the fandoms I write for ❤️❤️

Taglist: @outlawqueen17 @budugu @pomagranteseeds @mxacegrey @pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy @sande5098 @artistadiestrada2002 @noctemys @dumb-fawkin-bitch @trikigirl271 @khaleesihavilliard @ruleroftheuniverse @stickyfictioninwriting

#kaz brekker #six of crows #grishaverse #shadow and bone #kaz brekker x reader #grishaverse x reader #jesper fahey #inej ghafa #shadow and bone imagine

[astrhae]

kanej and 20 for the kiss prompt 😌

20. on a scar.

enjoy this deleted scene from the kaz character study i'm writing :)

--------------------------------

Winter rolled over and The Wraith sat in the harbor, sails waiting to be stitched up. Kaz tossed Inej’s last letter into the fire: he didn’t have any need for it when he could recite it word for word, and any proof of sentiment was always a paved path to downfall in the Barrel.

“I see you missed me,” Inej laughed, watching the paper curl as it turned to ash – its last attempt at surviving the fire.

“The Van Verents lost two ships at sea last month,” Kaz replied. He watched her perch on a stack of wooden crates beside the fire – filled with weevils that he’d coaxed Wylan into making. “And Boreg’s business hasn’t recovered since he lost his cargo ship.”

She flicked her hair behind her shoulders. It was untied, but still carried the waves from her braids: marks that were never quite lost.

“I’m not here to talk business, Kaz,” she chided.

He dared to take a step closer, his gloved hand braced against the back of his chair. “Everything is business,” he said, because it was.

And if his gaze lingered on the corner of her eyes, then it was nobody’s damned business but his own. His thumb tapped a counting rhythm on the chair’s polished wood. This office in The Silver Six was the same as when Inej was last here, the DeKappel hanging above the fireplace.

Inej put her hairpin down on the crate beside her. A nightingale, its tail a needle meant to cut. “My parents say they miss you – they’ve invited you again to Ravka.”

Kaz watched the slump of her back. He had little modesty left with her, and he’d learned to see her well enough to know where her hurts were. The scar on her wrist was something more widely known, but there was one on her navel from falling off a high wire when she was eight, another on her ankle from when he’d trained her to slip across the roofs, a nick on her knuckle from when she’d first learned to spin her knives.

Sankt Petyr, he knew all their names as he knew all her shadows. As he knew all the scars she left, down to the bone, across ledgers and legacies and loyalties: in a year, Boreg would be out of business entirely, and Inej would still be Queen of the True Sea. But Kaz watched the fire flicker, changing the shape of the dark, changing the way her edges curled into themselves.

“You’re hurt,” Kaz concluded.

“It’s almost healed,” Inej shrugged, then winced. “A swordfight, two weeks ago.”

That had been a gift from Jesper: a rapier sleek enough for her to spin with. Sankta Maradi, named after the patron saint who started the Zemeni tradition of choosing family names. Brekker. Rietveld. Ghafa. Hendriks. Kaz had chosen for himself a name that tied him to no one: he had no mother to welcome him back home. Only the harbor, only the ship sitting on the horizon.

“We have a new Healer on the staff,” Kaz offered. Inej knew the girl: she had rescued them, a pair of sisters from Lij. One a Healer, the other an Alkemi.

“No,” Inej slipped her jacket off, leaving behind a thin shirt – one of its sleeves had been cut off to make way for a linen bandage wrapped around her shoulder. “I just had it changed.”

Still, Kaz stepped closer, until there was nothing left for him to brace himself on except her. He forced himself to stand upright, resting his weight on his good leg, his hands curled at his sides. Whoever had wrapped the bandage on her had done their job well, but Kaz held back a breath. There was the edge of an old scar trailing out from under the clean white – from that time she’d fallen off the sugar silos – and Inej was close. Unbearably close, after so many months away, after so many months without touch.

The sea salt was still tangled in her hair, a sharp scent that did little to help with his ghosts. But Inej was seated high enough on the crates that her shoulder reached Kaz’s eyes. A girl on a pedestal, a mockery of all the steps Kaz couldn’t climb. She sat there as he watched her: a witness, a shadow. Testament and testimony, made holy through all the lies they’d told. Through all the lies they’d told for each other.

He watched the last light of the setting sun outside hit her. More golden than any kruge he’d ever held, her dark hair turned almost auburn. And yet, the magic wasn’t in the light. He shuffled one step forward, his hands still curled into fists around his gloves, around his weakness. Greed is your god, Inej had once accused him, and it might well be, now, his greed for a little bit more of her towering over his own demons. Greed is your god, but Kaz had only once come close to worship.

The magic wasn’t in the light. The trick was in stopping the light. In making enough shadows to keep a secret, to hold a confession. In stopping the light, and telling it where to look. And allowing it to take no more.

He watched the last light of the setting sun break as it hit Inej, and he leaned forward – one last angle to crack the lock, as gentle as rusted metal required it – his eyes wide open. He couldn’t touch her skin just yet, but he knew well enough how to steal something, and he stole a little spite from himself. Kaz stood in front of Inej, and he let his lips brush over the rough cloth of the bandage.

A kiss. As much of a confession as he could make today.

When he stepped back, he found Inej smiling. Soft, with all the kindness the world never had for either of them. With all the kindness she had never let Kaz steal from her: the magic wasn’t in the light. It never was, for Kaz. It never was, for her. There were no bright colors that came with the kiss, no golden light to name fate or faith. There was only Inej’s smile.

There was only his own smile.

#asks #darjeelinh #six of crows #kanej #prompts #fic: stock market derivatives #full fic will be coming soon #i cheated a little in this prompt but i hope you like it anyway aksdkdsf

[sleepless-crows]

the way inej gets injured and has to stitch herself up in season 1 while jesper and kaz watch. and in crooked kingdom, kaz volunteers to change her bandages when she could've done it herself. the payoff will be immaculate

#grishaverse #six of crows #soc #shadow and bone #kaz brekker #inej ghafa #kanej

[huevokinder24]

Shadow and bone rant part 2

I already talked about the grisha trilogy, now let's address the crows.

I had my expectations high after what the showrunners did with season one. I was skeptical when I heard they were mixing the two stories together, but hey, they made it work somehow.... The first time.

Imo, they should have written an original plot for the crows like they did in season one, or adapt scenes that take place before the story. Like Kaz giving inej her first knife, or the famous "you shouldn't make friends with crows". The sword subplot was fine. They could have done that and be done with it. But no. For some reason they decided to take the most crucial parts and conversations of the SOC duology and include them without any context.

One of the reasons I love this duology is because of how well everything is wrapped up and linked to the last tiny detail. Especially in CK.

Kaz chose the Dregs as his gang when he was practically a child because he knew one day he would make it his. He'd been planning for that fight and coup d'etat for YEARS. From the moment he joined them. In the show it's just completely random, almost an insult to kaz's intelligence and thorough planning.

Keep in mind that the story of SOC is the story of Kaz's revenge. The reason he went to the ice court, why he wanted to become a barrel boss and is so focused on making money, is because he wanted revenge against pekka Rollins.

And here we got his backstory in 10 minutes and his revenge in another 10. No buildup, no context, no nothing.

The reason why kaz's plan to take revenge is absolutely brilliant is because he used his own trauma against Rollins. Rollins was scared shitless for weeks after that. Now he's the boss of hellgate. Alright.

Another thing that pisses me off is how they did the firepox. Kaz just went to Wylan and said, " hey, I need this". And Wylan just went "sure, here you go".

What about Nina? Nina, who after the parem lost her power, became a shell of herself, spent months thinking she was worthless... She was reborn in that moment as the queen of mourning. She went beyond what was believed to be the limits of grisha power, and made this new power her own. Amid all that chaos and fear she created, she was back to being nina, the badass grisha again.

The bandages scene. Where do I start with this. What do I even say? After 2 books of yearning, Kaz and inej are ready to open up to each other a little and TOUCH the other.

Inej's trauma wasn't explored enough for that scene to be meaningful. Kaz kept their gloves the entire time. It was rushed, it lacked the emotion that the book creates so masterfully. That is probably the most important scene in the entire duology and if I didn't know better I would think that was just another scene of the show.

Where was Kaz's vulnerability? His WANT. His effort to face his PTSD just to change inej's bandages, to prove that he was willing to try for her.

It was completely wasted.

The part when Kaz gives inej her contract... He looked almost angry when in CK it was one of the softest scenes in the story.

Everything was so disappointing.

What makes me even more upset is that the cast, both for the crows and the grisha trilogy, did such a wonderful job at bringing the characters to life. I loved seeing them. They were absolutely perfect, but the writing was all over the place.

They want to make a SOC spinoff but how will they do it when they've already adapted the key scenes of the story? It just doesn't make any sense

#im seriously so upset to see one of my fav stories ever being butchered like this #and what i hate even more is that it could have been great if only they'd respected the timelines #shado and bone #shadow and bone netflix #six of crows #crooked kingdom #kaz brekker #inej ghafa #nina zenik #wylan van eck #shadow and bone

[mayhemwrites]

heyyyy would you be open to maybe doing like a kanej first kiss after like a lot of healing and stuff?? idk im just in such a mood for kanej fluff rn :)) btw i love your main blog and i think ive read some of your writing and ita really good so thank you ❤️

omg, thank you so much!! that's really sweet of you omg

hope this is cute and fluffy enough 💕💕💕

kanej first kiss: “not like this”

The first time it happens is in a bathroom. Kaz changing Inej's bandage, his breaths short and sharp. Both terrified. It's only a moment of connection, of touch, before Kaz pulls away from her. She can't say she isn't disappointed. She also can't say she's surprised.

And then she leaves. Goes away from Ketterdam, which is all she's wanted for five years. Away from him, which is something she never thought she'd regret as much as she does.

She loves what she's doing now. Loves knowing that she's making a difference, stopping people from getting hurt.

She's just always conscious that without Kaz, it feels as if there's an ever-present hole in her heart.

So she comes back to visit, exactly one year, ten months, and seventeen days after she left. (Not that she's been counting.)

He's waiting at the dock for her, like he always is whenever she lets herself daydream about her return.

How had he known? Well, he's Kaz. He knows everything. She pushes away the thought that he came to the dock regularly, hoping for her to come back. That's not possible. This is Kaz. Resolutely unsentimental. (Even if he had told her that he loved her, right before she left.)

There's a wound on his face, dried blood on his jaw. Without thinking, she puts a hand to his face, fingertips brushing his chin as she inspects it.

This time, he doesn't pull away. Doesn't flinch at her touch. The wound isn't half as bad as it looks. So her worries were unfounded - he'll be fine.

Inej breathes a sigh of relief. Kaz will be fine. He always is. And she always worries that one day his luck will run out.

She goes to drop her hand, but before she can, she feels his gloved fingers on her wrist.

"Don't," he says.

"No?"

"I... I can manage this, now. I've been... working on my issues, let's say."

So she keeps her hand where it is.

Then - what is he doing? He takes off one glove, then the other.

He puts his own hand on her face, and even though he tries to hide it, she can see his smile. A small smile, one that doesn't come out very often. She's only ever seen it once or twice.

He looks so proud of himself, and her heart swells. There's a flutter of something in her stomach. For once, it isn't pure dread. Something else. Pure joy.

"Is this okay?" he asks.

She looks up at him, and hopes he can tell just how much she loves him from the look in her eyes. "Yes. Yes, this is more than okay."

He takes a shaky breath. "Actually, there's... something else that I think I'm ready to try. If you want to."

"What?"

"A kiss. This may sound unusually sentimental, but as I've been working through... everything, over the last two years, I've been finding more and more that I desperately want to kiss you."

Her heart stops, then starts again, thudding against her ribcage.

He desperately wants to kiss her.

He desperately wants to kiss her.

"Yes. Please," she says, her voice slightly breathless.

And he closes the gap between them, his lips on hers.

It's nothing like she's ever felt before. Inej has been kissed before, but not like this. Not as if she's everything somebody could ever want - and not just because of her body, or her talents, but because it's her.

Kaz loves her. She's conscious of everywhere they're touching - her hand on his face, and his on hers. His hand on the small of her back, holding her steady. She reaches up to run her free hand through his hair, and smiles with satisfaction at the shocked-yet-pleased look on his face.

She pulls away for a brief moment, to whisper: "I missed you. Every second of every day, I missed you."

"I didn't think you would," he admits. "I missed you too, though."

"Did you really?"

"Why do you think I was at the dock?"

Her eyes widen in surprise. "You- did you know I was on my way back?"

"No," he says, shaking his head almost sheepishly. "I hoped you would, though. Every day, I hoped. Selfishly, yes - I heard about everything you've done, and you do much more good out there than you ever did here. But I missed you."

It's as if her brain has short-circuited.

He missed her.

He hoped she would return.

He missed her.

There are no words for everything she feels. How she didn't think she would get to have this, not since she was a little girl. She'd thought she would have to be alone and independent forever.

But now she has Kaz to lean on, and that's exactly what she does.

She leans into him, relaxing. She lets him hold her, knowing he won't let go of her. His arms wrap around her waist, and she knows she never wants to leave him again.

After a minute, she looks up at him. "I want to kiss you again," she tells him softly. "May I?"

He nods, and when she looks into his eyes and kisses him, she knows he's hers forever.

#six of crows #kanej #mayhem writes #kaz brekker #inej ghafa #grishaverse

[aworldinsideofthem]

Shadow and Bone season two thoughts

I tweeted a little as I watched, but I realised I wanted to put together my thoughts more longform, so here we go. In general: I liked it still but not as much as S1, I had Thoughts.

Spoilers for all of the season after the read more.

Idk maybe its the fact that they started referencing events from Crooked Kingdom - a source I care about a lot and um more than some of the other books - that I started to get pickier but I did.

To quickly get the Mal, Alina, Darkling, Nikolai plot of it all. I liked all the new casting (Nikolai took a little to grow on me, but Tolya and Tamar were great the whole way through). Generally I was fairly unmoved by it all, but this plot really isn't why I am watching the show. Genya gave me some feelings. Zoe Wannamaker is great. I preferred Ben Barnes' villain moments more in S1 but the end in the desert did make me feel a little bit.

I'll deal with the !!! end separately.

So, the Crows. I wasn't sure what I expected them to do - knowing that they wouldn't do The Ice Court - but idk I was a little surprised they mined Crooked Kingdom the way they did because in my mind it so clearly needs the events of SOC for emotional reasons for CK events to work, but I think they ... sort of pulled it off. Sort of.

I mean, they rushed the fuck out of it. I know they wanted to reunite the plots but I wanted more out of Kaz's revenge and yes we got a lot of investigation of Kaz's trauma but I wanted a bit more set-up for all the Crows. The cane fight was very good though. Freddy was great in the confrontation scene - so good - but I admit I missed the quiet of the book church scene and that only Inej saw it. Inej not being there, it being surrounded by lots of people ... it felt different.

The Kanej: they hinted at book stuff but it all just felt a little watered down. Yes we got the bandages scene but only nods to it because they're not really there yet emotionally, and yes he tried to get her out and got her freedom but I didn't really see the point in having that weird fight in the middle. Yes, he is pushing her away but it just seemed odd. The hallucination scene was feelings-y but kinda confusing in why they had that for Inej, but the recovery form it was nicely done with the softness in Kaz's eyes before the !!! sets in. However the final ep "I will have you without armour" scene was pretty great. And his looks when he saw her walk back with Alina and the sword! I love them.

Wesper: I liked Jack's Wylan from the get go and I thought him and Kit had good chemistry. Even with the plot changes I found them very cute and charming.

Also the bit where Jesper lists off how Kaz couldn't imagine doing this without him, and Kaz said yes all of that - but not the unlimited tab. I love me some Kaz and Jesper friendship.

Nina with the Crows was great. She doesn't take Kaz's bullshit and I loved the "there is five of us" moment at the end.

Matthias: welp sorry Calahan you had shit all to do. I did assume they were gonna get him out this season but uh guess that is for the Ice Court spinoff.

The end: haha they sure changed a lot there. A lot. Are they setting up something for S&B S3 and also SOC?? Now with Dark Alina in charge of Ravka and King of Scars Nikolai stuff?? Mal going away with Tolya, Tamar and Inej?? I liked that Inej is getting a pirate slave hunter moment (but I still need that Kanej boat scene. I need it). I guess they'll find a way to get her back? Will she get caught?? So many questions. So random.

I don't care about Mal x Alina really but uh if I did and that ending happened and I was expecting the R&R ending. Well.

Are they going to do a Tolya and Inej moment? I have mixed feelings.

Anyway in conclusion: I love the Crows! Some things were good! The actors were all great! But eh some choices I'm not sure about it. I need the Ice Court story though. Please Netflix.

Yes I have read book scenes and I might go hunt down some of my Kanej fic faves ...

#shadow and bone #shadow and bone spoilers #kanej #wesper #kaz brekker #inej ghafa #jesper fahey #wylan van eck

[sankta-starkova]

BURN IT DOWN

004; WELCOME BACK

previous chapter | next chapter | masterlist

summary: the one where harlow kaz goes into a new mission with her best friend to help the rebellion but ends up meeting a man who changes her life completely

worcount: 1.3k

As they walked towards the camp, Harlow could tell that he was nervous as any human would be walking into a situation like

"Don't worry Cassian, I've got this under control," she said, shaking her head, not looking at him, "I mean Clem,"

When they got close, everyone started to crowd around as they wondered who was walking into camp with Harlow.

"Gather up, we need to talk," Vel said and he recognised her as the girl from earlier.

He looked around at the group and listened to Vel as she introduced him, "This is Clem, I mentioned him earlier and luckily Harlow just arrived with him,"

Everybody that surrounded him seemed nervous and suspicious of Cassian and they had every right to be.

"He'll give us critical redundancy in all areas," Vel said before turning to the group, "That's Skeen, this is Taramyn, Nemik and Cinta,"

"Can I speak with you," Taramyn said, his voice clearly angry and she could tell he was mad at both Vel and Harlow.

"Lets get Clem settled in, Cinta, Harlow, can you two go help him out," she said and the two nodded, Cinta looking at her older sister suspiciously.

"Welcome Clem, we appreciate all the help we can get," Nemik said, a smile on his face.

He knew that of Harlow was trusting this guy then he could as well. They had been best friend since they met at school and he had shared his political manifesto with her.

Cinta led Cassian to the hut closest to them and Harlow told him to sit down, watching as her sister grabbed some stuff from a medpack.

"Am I going to get you to take your shirt off now?" She joked, grabbing two canteens of water, one for each of them, from the side. 

"You're funny," he said, trying to keep a neutral face but a smile peeking out from it.

He looked down at her as she knelt down on the floor, "Okay, let me just-" Hatlow said, rolling up his sleeve and taking the bandage off, wincing when she saw the burn again.

"It doesn't hurt that much, really," he promised, looking into her eyes, a slight smile on his face, "And you did a good job bandaging it the first time,"

There was this sort of charm to cassian that she had never seen before and it made her smile, made her look at him in a different way than she'd ever looked at a man before but she ignored it, pretending it was just that she admired him.

She shook her head, pulling the bandage completely off and grabbing a new strip that they had, the old wound had bled through the last bandage and she didn't believe that it didn't hurt that much.

"Cin, can you grab me a bit booster when you're done over there?" She asked.

"That's a nasty burn, remember we need to save our pain meds 'Low," Cinta said before walking to the other side of the hut to grab the pain medication.

He looked over at her and saw that they looked similar, same dark hair, same subtle smile, same mischievous gleam in their eyes.

"That's your sister," He stated and she nodded, looking over at Cinta. She grabbed the syringe, filling it up slightly with some bacta serum before handing it to her sister.

"This is better than the shit last time," she said, "It's going to heal it faster, and it's going to hurt,"

She placed the needle onto his forearm and he looked away, flinching slightly when she pressed the button as it injected him with the small amount of bacta serum.

Cassian shook it off, looking at Harlow and then at her sister. She followed his eyeline and watched as her sister cleaned everything up.

"Yeah, she's barely twenty years old and look at her, running around and getting this all ready," she said, a smile on her face.

She cared about her sister more than anything and had always sworn to protect her so going on this mission meant she couldn't guarantee her safety. 

"And Nemik?" Cassian questioned, having seen the way the two looked at each other the second they got into camp.

"My best friend," She said, smiling, "Skeen and I get along okay and Taramyn will warm up to you eventually,"

She walked over to her sister, looking back to check on Cassian. When she looked back at Cinta, the girl was smiling.

"You're very friendly with the new guy," she said teasingly, watching as her sisters face heated up.

"I got him out of a situation, but that doesn't matter," she said, shaking her head.

Harlow shook her head, looking back at Cassian before turning to her sister and watching the smile grow on her face.

"Really, cause to me it seemed like you couldn't wait for him to take his shirt off," Cinta said jokingly, a smirk on her face.

She was teasing her because she had never seen her sister act like that around a guy before and there was a high chance they were going to die soon so she wanted to figure it out.

Harlow pushed her arm, shaking her head, "Go to hell," She said before she heard someone yelling.

"You go, I'll look after your guy," Cinta said with a smirk.

Harlow walked off, flipping her sister off as she tried to stop the fighting. When she got out of the hut she saw Nemik who reassured her that everything was okay, it was just about Clem.

"There's nothing wrong with Clem, we can trust him," Harlow said, sitting down next to her friend.

They had been best friends since they were teenagers having gone to the same school in coruscant and the same university, that was where they had decided to change the world and not be like the stuffy politicians that surrounded them.

"I know, he seems to have good intentions," Nemik said, narrowing his eyes at her, "How do you really know him?"

"I saved his arse and that's all that matters," she said, taking a bite from the bread that Nemik handed her.

He knew that she was lying and that there was something else going on but let it go, knowing that she'd explain it in  her own time

"He's nice," he stated, looking over at her, he wanted to see his friends reaction.

"Yeah, bit of an arrogant prick though," she said, laughing at her own comment.

"Yeah, looks like it, but he seems like he is dedicated to this cause," Nemik said.

She shrugged her shoulders, "I'm not sure about that Karis, but I know he's going to be able to help this mission," she suggests.

He was about to respond to her comment and scold her for saying his first name when they heard footsteps in the forest.

They both froze and turned to the forest when they heard a yell. That's when they saw Gorn walking towards them.

"Clem, come on out," Vel called and he stepped out of the hut.

He looked over at Harlow for reassurance and she nodded. Cassian walked closer to the man, eyeing him when he noticed the imperial uniform

"This is Lieutenant Gorn, he's our contact at the garrison," Vel explained.

Gorn was clearly angry at the plan and looked over at Vel, "We need to talk about this," he said, eyes narrowed at the man.

"Here's here and that's all that matters," Vel said, the message being loud and clear to the whole group.

Harlow nodded her head. She trusted Luthen with her life and if he believed that Cassian was vital to this mission, then he was 

#cassian andor x reader #cassian andor x oc #cassian andor x kaz!oc #cassian andor x fem!oc #burn it down; cassian andor #cassian andor fanfiction #cassian andor fic #cassian andor fanfic #star wars cassian #cassian andor fluff #cassian andor angst #cassian andor #andor series #star wars andor #andor fanfiction #andor #star wars series #star wars angst #star wars fic #star wars fanfiction #star wars #diego luna

[joanwatsonunofficial]

“Don’t Blame Me” by Taylor Swift, Kanej’s version

So I’m a major Swiftie and ever since I read soc and ck, I can’t help but think of Inej and Kaz when I hear this song. So here’s a lyric breakdown that nobody asked for of most of the two verses and part of the bridge because I have issues. Sorry it’s kinda long eheh

Kaz pov:

“Something happened for the first time in the darkest little paradise. Shaking, pacing, I just need you” in the prison cart on their way into the Ice Court when her voice brought him back from the depths

“For you I would cross the line” RIP Oomen’s eyeball

“For you I would waste my time” “there will be a net”, risking a job for her safety

“For you I would lose my mind” threatening Wylan and just being generally more unhinged when Inej was kidnapped

“Trip of my life every time, yeah every time you’re touching me” his touch aversion, his entire mind flipping out while changing her bandages in the blessed bathroom scene

Inej pov:

“My name is whatever you decide” accepting Kaz christening her “The Wraith”

“I’m just gonna call you mine” insisting on thinking of Kaz as human, just a boy, even a miracle, instead of the monster he said he was

“Halo hiding my obsession” her naturally pious nature giving way to her desire to kill the people that were beating Kaz on the floor of the Crow Club

“And baby, for you, I would fall from grace” her killing for him

“Just to touch your face” ROOF OF THE ICE COURT

Bonus:

“If you walk away, I’d beg you on my knees to stay.”

I like it when men beg.

Stay in Ketterdam. Stay with me.

Oh lord save me these two are going to destroy me.

#kanej brainrot #inej ghafa #kaz brekker #kanej #grishaverse #soc #six of crows #ck #crooked kingdom #shadow and bone #netflix #leigh bardugo #kaz x inej #i love them your honor #wesper #helnik #taylor swift #reputation #dont blame me #lyric breakdown #these two own me

[j-graysonlibrary]

The Xiang Chronicles: Book Four Chapter 3

Title: The Xiang Chronicles: Book Four

Author: Jay Grayson

Word Count: 118k

Genres: Fantasy, adventure, drama, LGBT+

Available on: my website

Synopsis: In order to save the world from the continuous subjugation and potential annihilation at the hands of Tiandi, hard lines must be drawn. The Great Spirits that were imprisoned ages ago must be unsealed and awakened, no matter the consequences.

The players are divided—those who stand blindly with Tiandi, such as Xiang Merra and her disciples versus those who want to tear the system down and give the power back to the people. Even a few of the most religious Lords change their minds when they learn the truth of the world—that Tiandi is no more than a dictator with no love in his heart.

It is up to the last, real Xiang and the ill-fated Chaaya to put everything they have into tearing God from his throne and creating new possibilities for the future.

Full chapter 3 under the cut

Chapter III:

The main room in the cave became divided into two, distinct areas. On one end, the Mistresses, bar Parvati, stood against the rock wall and looked on with varying degrees of upset. Kali was, expectedly, the angriest of the three while Devi seemed more wary than anything.

Kira led a small group through a portal, bringing in several new faces to the Mistresses. Chatter started to grow and fill up the usually empty space of the cavern.

After a moment of just watching, Devi pushed herself away from the wall and began to light more candles, attempting to be considerate to their human guests. Chandes hissed at the light and Kali just glared harder.

“Are you alright?” Baiya asked as he rushed, instantly, to his sister’s side.

She was helping Phay who had her arm wrapped up in bandages and hoisted into a sling. It seemed, in the time it took for things to calm down in Shakti’s lair, the lord had been administered first aid.

“She needs to rest,” Loa answered for her and helped to ease her onto a rock to sit.

“I will be fine,” Phay grumbled but complied. She rubbed over the sling and sighed. “It is just a fracture.”

“And some burns.”

“How bad are those?” Baiya raised his brows.

“Fine.” Phay shook her head.

It was clear she was, mostly, just upset that she had gotten hurt at all. Especially since everyone else in the cave seemed unscathed despite many of them having less experience in combat than her. Baiya realized that by hovering, he was probably wounding her pride further.

He gave a short but loaded look to his little sister, leaving Phay’s care up to her, and he returned to the bulk of the crowd.

“It’s so DARK in here!” May exclaimed as she passed by, being chased by Fujin. “And DANK!”

“It was completely black when we arrived,” Fujin told her, “One of the considerate women is lighting more candles—maybe you should thank her?”

The princess whipped around, a wide smile on her face. “No, I like it! It’s so sinister—like a real villain’s lair. Kira! Is this where you have been staying?!”

Baiya spotted Kaz rubbing his temples, no doubt missing the silence from moments ago. Kira, however, laughed though he did not move from his position next to Pangu and Raine.

“Yeah, I have been staying here for the past year or so.”

She continued to look around the cave, awe in her eyes, while Fujin tailed her. No one else followed but Kali and Chandes did watch them with two very different expressions.

But Baiya did not concern himself with that—he stationed himself with Pangu as well and rested a hand on Viren’s back as the two hugged. It was a relief to see he was well though he’d had no doubts. The only one he had been truly worried about was Oli but that, as it turned out, was unnecessary as the young man had just a bandage on his shoulder from a cut.

“Did the rest of the army retreat?” Raine asked once Pangu and Viren parted from one another.

“They did,” Viren responded with a quick nod. He glanced over his shoulder to where Phay and Loa were before continuing, “We pulled everyone back to the camp as well to tend to injuries and collect the dead. Phay ordered her second in command to be on guard and start fortifications on the camp. Also, Baiya.”

Their eyes met and Baiya arched his scarred eyebrow. “Yes?”

“She sent word to the troop with your family and they will be escorted back home. For extra precaution, a few soldiers will stay with them as guards.”

It was a weight off of his back, certainly. He had not doubted Phay would pull through for them though—not with her relationship with Loa being what it was. As far as he was concerned, she was already part of the family. Protecting them was just something that came naturally to her.

“That is a relief,” Pangu said with a sigh.

“And with the encampment on the border, it should be nigh impossible for them to be in danger again, right?” Kaz asked and stepped a little closer into the group. He reached a hand out toward Pangu but then, seemingly, thought better of it and pulled away.

“That, combined with the other encampments lined along the border,” Raine answered this time. He was quite familiar with what had been there, at least what was there a few months ago. If he had to guess, he would assume that only more had popped up. “They are safe.”

Everyone, almost in turns, glanced over to Baiya as if to silently assure him. He held in a laugh. “I know they are safe.”

“The real question is: are we?” Oli raised a valid point. He rubbed the side of his injured arm with a pout and looked around, hoping for answers.

“OW!” May’s yelling caused them all to look over, at once, to the far side of the cave. She was cradling her hand and standing, almost, in another tunnel.

“Do not touch that—it looks toxic,” Fujin huffed.

May, again, tried to poke one of the glowing mushrooms and was slapped a second time, starting a fight between the two. Luckily, Devi glided toward them and set a hand on each of them.

“They are not dangerous to the touch. Only if you eat them.”

The group, collectively, sighed in relief. Keeping the princess from eating something would be a much easier task than trying to keep her hands at her sides.

“Anyway,” Raine cleared his throat, “I do suppose it will be difficult for us to stay at the farmhouse going forward.”

“Shakti has agreed to let us stay here,” Kira replied and gestured around, vaguely.

“Is there enough space?” Kaz asked.

“Probably?” Kira shrugged.

“There is going to have to be,” Pangu left little room for argument when he spoke, “We cannot leave…rather, I cannot leave until I learn to hide my presence. With Zhu dead, everyone will be after us, all of the time. It is too risky to hide out anywhere else.”

“I am not sorry I killed him,” Kira stated, flat out.

“Neither am I,” Pangu replied with an airy laugh.

“Good. Though, I am sure your old teacher might have a problem with me.” Kira’s eyes narrowed in the direction of Gong and Parvati who occupied the far opposite wall of the opening. They looked even more ostracized than their group did.

But they could still hear them.

Gong crossed his arms. “I do not mind,” he said, “Honestly, I may even be thankful that he is gone.”

That surprised Kira. He had been expecting some pushback, even if just on principle. “Oh?”

“I am sure I was on the verge of being killed and replaced by them anyway,” Gong mentioned with a half-shrug, “You did me a favor and, while it will make travel for you all more difficult in the moment, it will be a blessing in the long term. Besides, Zhu was kind of a dick anyway.”

A roar of laughter broke out, Pangu’s laugh being among the loudest. He had actually never seen Gong so relaxed or honest—he was beginning to wonder if he ever really knew him. Parvati surely did. She hardly even snickered, as if she expected the exact comment. All she did was look at him and smile with the same, relaxed expression he held.

“Well,” Pangu said, wiping the corner of his eyes to catch any stray tears, “I suppose we should move on to the reason we brought everyone here. We need to talk about our next move and it is a lot to cover. Too much to repeat so…”

They all checked in with the rest of their party—the women—who were now sitting together and chatting. Probably about them, based on the looks they received.

“You need us?” Fujin asked, already standing up to join them.

“Stay there, we will come over,” Kaz said and began to walk toward her.

“Is there no larger room? With…seats?” Pangu whipped his head about the space, realizing they may have to sit on the floor to have the meeting. It was fine, really, but he had been imagining everyone sitting around a long table and pushing maps around or something.

“Not that I know of,” Kira replied. “Sorry.”

Pangu shook his head. “It is alright. Here is fine.”

They all sat down, forming a loose circle with Phay and Loa at one point and Pangu opposite them. Viren, Baiya, Kaz, and Oli filled the left side of Pangu while Kira, Raine, Fujin, and May were at the right. Kira did not fail to notice the Mistresses shuffling closer to listen in, as if they were doing something especially sneaky.

He rolled his eyes and focused on Pangu who cleared his throat.

“Alright, as I am sure you can all guess, we are not in a great position right now. Tiandi will not be happy with us and we need to take refuge with Shakti to survive. It is not a great situation…” he sighed and then gathered some gusto to continue, “but, not everything is terrible. There are four Great Spirits that, if we free, can give us an advantage over Tiandi.”

“So we are fighting him,” Phay clarified with a frown. “Though I suppose fighting Merra was already fighting Tiandi in a way…”

“True.” Fujin nodded. Although she had not quite thought of it that way before; having it laid out so plainly made sense.

“So what are these spirits?” May cocked her head to the side. “I haven’t heard of them.”

“Is it like the ones in the oasis?” Raine followed up.

“Or Gnoma?”Baiya added.

Pangu chewed his lip and then nodded slowly. “Yes…they were correct. Tiandi did come here and force his will over the place. And, in doing so, had to seal away the greatest threats to him—the Great Spirits. Now, we cannot be sure the state of them when we do release them but, hopefully, their power will give us the edge over Tiandi we need. Plus, freeing them is the right thing to do anyway.”

“Do you know where they are?” Loa asked.

Everyone else turned their heads to look at Pangu, each wondering the same thing.

“Vaguely. Well, one for certain but I am not sure I want to rush straight back there to be honest with you…” Pangu mumbled the last bit and then laughed at himself. “Gong says he has some general ideas but we will be having to search them out, more than likely, so we cannot go until I have mastered a technique to hide myself and everyone with me from the eyes of the spirits.”

“So we wait around until you are ready?” May groaned, already primed to complain.

“Oh, you all need more training too.” Pangu laughed.

Kaz, openly, pointed and laughed at the princess while she crossed her arms and huffed.

Pangu felt a tad guilty so he clarified, “Many of you are still new to your abilities. While I am training, you should try to sharpen your skills as well. My disciples will help.” He gestured to either side of him. “Again, we do not know what we will be up against.”

“So, when we are ready to start hunting for these spirits,” Kira pivoted, “I guess I will be providing portals to each location? It will save time and, hopefully, make things easier.”

Raine, immediately, grabbed one of his hands. “Are you alright using miasma that much?”

Kira laughed and responded, “Raine, I use portals just to get snacks sometimes. I don’t mind.”

“That would be very helpful, Kira,” Pangu returned to the initial suggestion and smiled. “So, it will be the two of us for every mission and, for Enlil we will take May, Fujin, and Kaz. For Kyrie, we will take Raine and so on.”

Baiya frowned a little but he did understand the logic behind the idea. It would be far too difficult for Kira to transport all of them every time and smaller groups would be easier to move about undetected. Still, he did not feel great knowing he would only be able to accompany Pangu on one mission.

“Tomorrow, we will begin training,” Pangu continued on and waited for the response. Everyone just, collectively, nodded but there was no real excitement. He sighed. “Maybe we should claim our rooms and rest now?”

“I actually do not know how many ‘rooms’ there are down here but it is a big cave system,” Kira mumbled.

“We can set a few nice areas up for you all,” Devi squeezed into the conversation. She leaned down and regarded the group warmly. “Some of you may need to pair up, however.”

“You can give the four of us one room,” Pangu said and pointed to his left.

“One for us,” May announced and gestured between herself and Fujin. She then went about pointing at the other couples. “One for them.” Loa and Phay. “And one for them.” Raine and Kira.

Oli, realizing he was the odd man out, started to fidget. “I guess only me in a room then…?”

“Hey, you!” Chandes yelled and kicked a lump on the ground. The necromancer, who everyone had forgotten was in the room, jolted up with his dog in his arms. “Share your room!”

“Why do I have to? There are a million little rooms in this place—I’ve looked!”

“Not all of them have beds, you buffoon!” She gave him a series of little kicks in the ribs. “Share! Share! Share!”

The man shielded himself and wailed, “I hate all of you!”

#the xiang chronicles #my novel #my writing

[girlfrandletters]

I Love You In So Many Ways And I See That Everytime I Do Basic Tasks

Our conversation the other day about what your favorite color is really struck a cord with me for some reason. I told you that you must not be my real boyfriend because you said your mood changed your favorite color. And then it reminded me of how you said when you were happy, your favorite color was orange. And that in turn made me think about how I've always loved fall and fall colors, but now it had even more of a meaning because most of the fall colors are shades of orange. Fall makes me happy, and orange is your happy color. Maybe that's why I get so damn excited for the autumn months.

I've been thinking about this exchange a lot over the last 24 hours and it just instills even more love for you. For no reason. Literally just thinking about your happy color makes me happy. How pathetic does that sound.

...

I was listening to Crooked Kingdom on my way home from work, which is the book from which my cup and crow tattoo comes from. I've read this duology (Six of Crows and Crooked Kingdom) about 4 times, I've listened to the audiobook two or three times. I could tell you what is about to happen in the book if you were to open up the page and read me a few paragraphs. All of this is to say that these two books really hit something deep inside me. On the surface, the book is about a bunch of criminal kids pulling off heists, beating odds, and winning over the bad guys. But deep in the heart of the book, you find the true meaning to be about having flaws, making mistakes, having traumatic histories and getting through them, working through them, and coming out on top of them.

Each one of the characters has something they end up working on throughout the two books, be it PTSD, physical trauma, gambling addiction, drug addiction, personal shame, or fighting to think outside of what they were raised to believe. And the other major point of these books is to help you see that you do not know what anybody else is doing through. Who would have thought that the eternally upbeat, happy boy was 7 feet deep in gambling debt. Who knew that the hard, rough edged boy who everyone fears, can't touch human skin without blacking out. Who'd think that the boy who can put together bombs and create perfect schematics of a complex system was disowned by his father because he can't read. I relate to these books because I have my own issues that I'm working through and they have helped me be more interested in healing myself and getting better. I will never know the fear and physical trauma of being sold to a brothel, or of risking my life for a drug addiction, but I will know the fear of emotional abuse, of waiting to be reprimanded or put down because of a comment, of feeling too clingy or obsessive, or not having enough emotion. Who would think that the girl who comes into work with a smile and hugs sometimes thinks about driving off a bridge or jumping off a cliff and drowning.

Every time I listen to these books, I also think about how other people are also going through their own struggles and fighting their personal demons. I've always found that after I read these books, I'm able to maintain a level head for people that frustrate me because I consider that while they may be angry at me or at a situation, maybe there's something else going on that I don't know about.

To tie this all back to you, I have to go back to the beginning of my side tangent here.

I was listening to Crooked Kingdom on my way home from work today and I got to one of my favorite scenes. In this scene, Kaz (the boy who can't physically touch anybody without having a panic attack) and Inej (the girl sold into the brothel), have one of the most emotionally charged moments. Inej was covered in deep knife wounds and Kaz offers to change her bandages for her. Which, in the grand scheme of things in this book, is the equivalent of him proposing to her. And you see his struggle - he WANTS to touch her, he wants to be able to change her bandages without panicking, he wants to be close to her, but he struggles because his immediate reaction is to run as far away as possible. But in the end, he does change all 3 bandages, he gets through his panic. In the end, he does back away and pushes her away because he can't fight off his panic all the way, and I think he's very ashamed of that.

It's weird that this scene made me think of you in that context. But the thing that I thought while listening to this scene was that I want to push through all my internal struggles and fight all my demons with you. I want you with me when I have to stave off my passive suicidal thoughts. I want to know your arms are there when I hate myself and my face and feel like you could do better. I want you around me when I fall into my pits because your face, your voice, your mere being helps me get up. And I want to be here for you too. I want to hold you and talk to you and hear you when you are working through your stresses with work, with school, with your general feelings.

This scene made me think of you because we are this already. We are each other's rocks in the storms that go on in our heads. We hold each other's hand and refuse to let go, no matter how rough it gets. And I appreciate that. I love the fact that I can count on you, and no matter what I feel about myself, you can count on me too. Because I will always be here for you, and I know you will always be here for me as well.

I love you

and I love the color orange too

because we are happy

even when we aren't

because we have each other.

I love you

~Girlfrand

[whoslaurapalmer]

shadow and bone s2, ep3

-it's been years since i read siege and storm do they really fly through the fold. they could've just GONE AROUND -i know the point is to try and destroy the fold but.......eh -going from sea to air WAS very impressive though.

-where are alina's stag bones?????? not that i want to see them, that take was a fucking mistake -I'M JUST SAYING

-jesper and wylan having had a one night stand before doesn't like........add anything significant, or, like......anything that matters? -like. it's just not needed. it's not a necessary change from how they met in the books, it just like, makes it awkward -and it removes their. not exactly a slow burn but. how they really grow on each other

-it's not TERRIBLE to move scenes around and stuff and the show is vibing on its own continuity but it's also like. the bandage scene now???? the most iconic scene in the whole series, now???? -before we've seen all the necessary stuff to get there???? -of course the show created it's own Stuff to get there but like.........was it enough to warrant the bandage scene now????????????? -AND NOT EVEN ALL OF THE BANDAGE SCENE AT ONCE!!!! -same with the per haskell fight!!!!!! -AND WHERE! MAY I ASK!!!! ARE ANIKA AND PIM!!!!

-inej fighting what his face is NOTHING compared to inej and dunyasha fighting on top of ghezen's hand

-OH SHIT!!!! -the darkling did NOT cut off baghra's finger in the books right????? holy SHIT -is he??? going to make HER BONE into an amplifier??? -if that's the end of baghra. that also takes away the power in her deciding to die

-david going straight to genya and going 'HE CUT OFF BAGHRA'S FINGER!!!!!' i love him

-this is the first we're hearing of genya and the king right. that also. could've been played out better

-wylan???? gets the objection at doing anything to alby??? -it's not necessarily that it matters that it's said at all -- even by inej -- bc kaz never intended to kill alby at all, which is the whole point, that kaz would never, even with 'he's just a kid.' 'so was i.' -'i could only kill him once' in the books is simultaneously so. merciful and so HAUNTING -but it also matters that........inej says it. that that's where she wouldn't follow him. that he tells HER, BECAUSE SHE ASKED -it sets up the reveal of wylan's father (children aren't their parents) but it takes away from something else so like is it worth it?????

-pekka asks nina to bring him kaz??????? -well that happened!!!!!!!

-it's fun to see alina get, well presumably more powerful while the darkling is just losing it. the parallel of it all -it's what you deserve, aleksander!!!!! -but alina is also like.......her needing more training is important too

#shadow and bone spoilers #lulu talks about shadow and bone

[crowgreeds]

Inej ( @noblehcart​ ) said: "I never thought we'd be back here." Granted it wasn't a hotel bathroom, it was the master bathroom of the van eck mansion. It was just as grand if not more so than the hotel bath and with Wylan's horrendous guilt he insisted Kaz recover there till a trusted healer was found. A difficult task in ketterdam. Harder still was this. She remembered siting on the counter waiting still and silent for him to cut the bandages and replace them. Only the ordeal wasn’t so difficult for her as it would be for him. Things were never easy for them it seemed.

“Will you manage?”

     Their shoulders were a tight knot of tension, something that probably did little to help with the searing pain that his back is still in, even slathered in aloe vera gel as it is. Kaz didn't like that they were here, in a familiar yet unfamiliar space with Inej standing but a few feet away from where he's balanced himself against the counter. If he had his way he'd be back at The Slat in the sweet isolation of his room where he could sequester himself away with little worry about being bothered. Here was different with servants and other people buzzing about and easily able to pop in and ask if they would need any help. His answer always was no, but when it came to Inej such answers would not work on her. They never had.

It is the sound of her voice, always her voice, that brings them back, that anchors them into the present. They couldn't help but think of when things had been reversed when it had been Inej in bandages and they had been the one to offer help to her. Now it is Inej standing there with the scissors and the roll of bandages and yet somehow he had the feeling it would be no easier for either one of them. It was almost as if no time had passed at all and they were still two wounded creatures unsure of how to go about one another.

     "I will be fine." He had to be, the bandages that wrapped around him needed to be changed, there was no going around that, and.... selfishly a part of him just wanted the chance to be close to her again. "Do what you have to do so I can get off this counter."

#noblehcart #finally answering this! #I love them sm do u understad #trickery is just my native tongue / ic #gonna strike a match and burn it / v. main. #// q.