#like im trying here

[actual-changeling]

love it when my family is like "talk to us! come visit!" and then doesn't answer my calls or call me back or answer my texts or acknowledge my existence in any way whatsoever

#alex yells at the void #like im trying here #in my more depressed moments i think it's because now that ex f/ther is gone #they need someone else to hate and see me as the closest one to him #because all the abuse was just me provoking him according to them. all my fault. for 20 years #what a horrible toddler i must have been huh #like i know it's not completely true but it hurts and part of it does feel like it's true

[the-cookie-of-doom]

me, eating glass: partial points are better than no points, partial points are better than no points, partial points-

#cookie speaks #turned in a thing late #bc i was stupid and got distracted #it was like half an hour later #i turned it in after midnight #and i was HOPING my teacher would ynnow #have a little grace #but she just added a note to the assignment that siad: late #50% #is better than 0% #but dammit it feels BAD #i HATE turning in late work I would rather just do nothing #that little note just made me sad #like im trying here #im trying very hard #please don't remind me that im still fucking up

[gibbearish]

love when ppl defend the aggressive monetization of the internet with "what, do you just expect it to be free and them not make a profit???" like. yeah that would be really nice actually i would love that:)! thanks for asking

#yes i want things to be free like ??? that is not a weird desire #'but but it costs money to keep up' ok and? how is that my problem #the government has plenty of murder dollars they could reallocate a few to make internet services universal if they wanted #also these companies were perfectly capable of supporting themselves before the internet got drowned with ads so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ #edit: muting notifs on this post bc new additions have kind of petered out #so no one feel bad about adding something someone else has said‚ it is not bothering me im just trying to keep my #notifs page cleanish lol #also since i saw some people are being redirected to read my tags: firstly hiiiiii this is a special secret message for you:3 #secondly i have learned since making this that the reason they were able to support themselves previously was because #of investors bankrolling everything #and theyre now finally realizing that theyre never going to actually make a profit and arent as willing to invest #however thats just a minor correction and doesnt change my overall point #once again. so many murder dollars #so thats why im just adding it here in the tags rather than making an actual correction #anyways . love yall 💕 #origibberish #bigger gibbers

[jaydarino]

Sometimes girlhood is matching hello kitty oodies with your mortal enemy

#I have such a back log of jjk drawings i need to upload here #im somehow more active on twt even tho everytime i post i feel like i'm being flayed alive #idk just girly things #jjk fanart #jujutsu kaisen #ryomen sukuna #sukuna #yuji itadori #itadori yuuji #hello kitty #bnha kept trying to sneak its way into my tags #babe this??? isnt about you????

[scamoosh]

hi guyz i made a quiz abt which horror trope/theme i enjoy you are!! cws are in the description so please mind them!

#quizzes #uquiz #thank u that is all #this is just bc i was bored and have been workin more on my horror ocs recently #edit: adding here im not trying 2 diagnose anyone w catholic trauma its a uquiz☠️ #if u got that and u cant relate 2 themes of guilt like . sorry ? idk what 2 tell u LOL #this quiz is abt themes/motifs/aesthetics i think r juicy im not passing any judgment abt ur character here bc idk who u are hope this helps

[verflares]

i thought i felt your shape, but i was wrong. really all i felt was falsely strong, i held on tight and closed my eyes. it was dumb, i had no sense of your size. it was dumb to hold so tight.

#tumblr murked my quality so bad MY GODDDD please click on this i promise i have somewhat of an idea of wht im doing. kinda #anyway i once again have no idea what i was doing here but i did have fun. they make me miserable in the best way possible #im trying to be a bit more experimental both in style and colour... well. half on tht last one (guy who really likes reds and blues) #but im trying out line weight a bit more. hooty hoo. going to try drawing some more practice portraits n stuff soon #link #zelda #loz #botw #zelink #(a smidge bcus im insane. as usual) #princess zelda #zelda botw #link botw #loz fanart #tloz #i add new tags each time. i just like to get silly with it sometimes tbh :] #my art

[acekindaneat]

man loves his takoyaki

#I LOVE REIGEN'S STAGE PLAY ACTOR FR HE'S SO GOOFY #i recently watched it so it is stuck in my head ouugghh #I'll probably redraw more bits from the stageplay bc i love it a lot #also im trying out a new brush i hope it looks good #anyways heres the normal tags #mp100 #reigen arataka #arataka reigen #shigeo kageyama #kageyama shigeo #mp100 fanart #mob psycho 100 #comic #illustration #artists on tumblr #art #mi art stuff #i love takoyaki so much too one time i ate like 12 of it

[inkskinned]

something bad happened to you, and you died, and you came back wrong.

not wrong all the way. the little ways. you forget important dates, stopped going out with friends. it's harder to make you smile. you're apathetic towards things you used to love, afraid of places you used to go to cheer up. quieter. flinching. different.

you came back for love. you're still here for love. what pulled you back was a brightness so loud that even death couldn't outshout it. death heard the call and smiled at you and said okay. go home. somebody is waiting for you.

but you came back different. like lot's wife; you've turned into salt. you used to chirp through life in hops and skips; but now you lose skin just standing up. you have to move slower, skimming across this world without-touching-it. most things feel dull - until they're suddenly all-too-much. life, and being alive just rushes up and over you and you get hopelessly crushed.

you try to explain it to them: it is ugly, but this is what you are, now. the huge golden hoop of your halo now a little bronze ring. you are still watering your plants and wearing the same clothes. after all, you worked hard to come home. this life; so odd and off-color, now that you are wrong.

but they waited for you - it's just that they wanted the "you" that happened before this. the "you" that could sing in the show and hug people tight and look at a blade without breaking down to cry. the you with a smile in pictures. god, holyshit, it's like looking at a completely different person, isn't it. that other-you; the one they actually wanted.

you are the consolation prize. you are the body that forgot the ghost. you are the memory of the bad thing, and the death after; like you are wearing that memory as a banner. you are a fragment, an assembly. simulacrum. you don't make eye contact in mirrors, afraid the light will glance off and your true nature will flash back at you.

you hear them talk about it in their hushed, desperate whispers. sometimes they even admit it to your face; harsh and violent, acid thrown at christmas dinner. god, can you just fucking be normal again. you do not remember what normal is. you had to climb so far to get back here; you are far too exhausted. you want to open the glass door of your heart and show all the gears. can you help resolve whatever got messed up?

you try so, so hard. you came back for them. because you believed they would love you, even when you were so horribly broken. because you believed they would be patient. because you believed unconditional meant "without exception." you cannot do things the same way. you just get tired too quickly these days.

you want to put them on a couch and pour them the tea with hands that shake more than they remember. you want to line them up and draw them a map of where you have had to wander. you want to show every bruise in a backsplash; the little helpless ant of your soul carrying all that weight, over and over. you want to say: yes! it is different! but i did it for love!

you want to say: "i'm not the same, but i'm yours and i'm here. can that be enough?"

#this is very obviously about my battle with #ptsd #but i think it's also like a pretty apt metaphor for a lot of things like setting boundaries or going to therapy or choosing recovery #i was thinking about the 'comes back wrong' trope and i was like. oh no i have feelings about this bc i have mental illness #and once i stopped masking - i was WRONG. i was different #here's the good news: i am now INNUNDATED with love. fucking swimming in it. excelling at it. the people who stayed #learned my new self. my new different body and how i am different but i am trying. they have held me so tightly #and my life no longer feels quiet. it is not based in my suffering. it feels like i have been growing a tree in my chest #and now it is flowering. #it is so lovely to be surrounded by people who have said - oh! you cut off so many branches i was worried you weren't the same. but now... #... this is just a new you. and i love you. and i love that you're different and happy. #(but yeah also im nb so i was absolutely influenced by Trans things)

[pa-pa-plasma]

okay look, the real reason that zepotha shit is never gonna be Goncharov (besides it being a marketing ploy) is because Goncharov was treated like a fandom (collaborative including celebrities, built upon over time, openly fictional) & zepotha is treated like a tiktok trend (no collaboration, dies fast, treated like reality recklessly). it doesn't matter if it's interesting or cool or what, they've been built on completely different foundations. you're comparing Spiderverse to Endgame here. hydrogen bomb VS coughing baby. zepotha will never have Lynda Carter & Martin Scorsese's approval.

#zepotha #goncharov 1973 #goncharov #i know i dont usually tag shit like unreality but like. yeah. the fact they're actively trying to gaslight for real here is just. ehh #like have fun but also. know what youre having fun with #im just really lazy btw i dont want to tag shit. youre allowed to unfollow me because of that i dont care #also yes zepotha not being capitalized (derogatory)

[mitwodlemi]

(Spoilers for seasons 1-2 of TMA) HAPPY NEW YEARS!!!!

I got hyperfixated on The Magnus Archives back in November and now I can finally post some fanart for it! Here's my season 1 and 2 dump. I have much more stuff for the later seasons, which I will be posting soon hopefully.

Enjoy my drawings of the Eye's special little boy!!!!!

#tma #the magnus archives #jonathan sims #martin blackwood #tim stoker #sasha james #elias bouchard #johnathan sims #jonathan simms #trying to cover my bases here #timothy stoker #fanart #tma fanart #mimi makes art #digital art #tma spoilers #ermmm yeah. okay bye #art #please repost with credit i didnt have time to put my name on all of these i have to leave for work in like 5 minutes lol #also ignore how my designs for each character vary wildly from drawing to drawing. im just living my truth

[obsob]

once more around the sun!! :3

#mine #cats #happy new year!!! a little late but alas #i didnt like th colours here but now i love them hehehehehheheh #i hope everyone had a good holidays life development for me is i now like ice hockey #in my sports fan era...these greasy sweaty bloody white men...intrigue me #also i got a new diary!! im using th hobonichi cousin in kinda alarmed by it ngl a5 is a lot of space to fill #i tried the hobonichi techo a couple years ago n found it a rlly weird size 2 work in but now.........big page scawwy #im trying not 2 b too insane about it . like relax who cares #if i do cute spreads i will share them :3 #also in th same vein im not setting a book goal this year !! tbh i surpassed my goal last year by a lot and wasnt stressed about it at All #but i get so guilty about not reading sometimes like girl . guilty to who? god? are we catholic now? get a grip #anyway anway im going to toot on my flute and then eat my weight in mac n cheese #love how i had to get a new cork in my flute bc i didnt play for like 10 months n th guy was like play regularly! n i was like yeh will do! #and then did not do that #alas...time escapes me

[bananonbinary]

i feel like the sex negativity in ace spaces is....not a widespread problem, but getting to be a bit of a loud one. like, the vast majority of aces aren't puritans, but much like how terfs keep trying to claim its a Lesbian Thing to be transphobic despite the vast majority of lesbians being trans-inclusive, i think there's a certain subsection of aces trying to claim its an Ace Thing to shame people for having and talking about sex. cut that shit out.

#stop trying to use one marginalized identity to shame others #none of us want you here and you do not speak for us #also inch resting how the terfs also claim the same viewpoint #like im not gonna say 'if you do this ur a terf' #but its definitely the same playbook

[koipepo]

That omake of little Kabru not being able to show off his howetown sweets because of Misril gets to me a lot so...

Here's a happier Kabru (and Lairu)

#kabru #lairu #labru #laios #dungeon meshi #my art #my fanart #fanart #idk why i resort to fluffy fanart even tho i keep thinking and seeing gag/hornt lairu stuff #kabru is just so.. fascinating and actually endlessly tragic #i kinda like that ryoko kui doesnt try to over-explain or dramatize her characters that have tragic backstories. it makes her world that- #-much more believable and realistic. that being said i will devour more kabru stories from her #i kinda cant stop thinking abt kabru (and to an extent lairu) #ik in Lairu/Labru fanart Kabru is usually depicted as humorously in denial guy #but i see it everywhere and it made me think more of their more understanding phase in the epilogue #maybe laios is ooc here but i think he will also warm up to human connection now that he actually has people he cares abt around him #(and maybe because kabru is teaching him tips and trick to be a Normal Guy lmao) #im also not very good at humor so theres only so much i can do with gag lairu 😂

[amanfromnewjersey]

I am going insane about these stoats

(my insta is @trisideseye and that's where I mostly post art. I'm purely posting here bc @quiddie is active on here and I need aabria to know, personally ,how fucked up I am about these stoats)

#burrows end #burrows end spoilers #burrows end tula #tula burrows end #brennan lee mulligan #aabria iyengar #i. abandoned tumblr. i am trying to not use tumblr for any more than following people. i used to post here but i gave up bc i got annoyed #im in physical pain. every ounce of me doesnt want to post my cool art on fuckung tumblr. #tumblr CANNOT be my main social again. I need to give my socials to EMPLOYERS. i want to make art for a JOB #but there are more dimension 20 bitches on tumblr than insta bc its the mentally ill platform #and i need. peiple to understand how fycked up i am abt this stoat mom. #im insane. im insane. im insane. im biting this piece of media im the jugular like i myself am a stoat #and i cant SAY that on instagram the EMPLOYERS will have my ass!!!!!! #anyways. #dimension 20

[vampireposter]

meeting wyll at the grove, as someone who the tieflings trust enough to train their children, says so much about him. it's so sad that he doesn't get explored in acts 2-3 as deeply as the other companions, when his problems are equally intense. the average player probably long rests once before coming across the grove, but even if not, in that time wyll has already proven to the tieflings that they can rely on the Blade of Frontiers.

this is the immediate first thing he chooses to do after being condemned to slow death via ceremorphosis. his priority list in the first conversations with tav is: 1) hunt down a dangerous devil, 2) help zevlor with the goblins, 3) once nothing threatens the tieflings he will gladly search for a tadpole cure. wyll is perpetually his own last priority, and i wonder if it has to do with the lore about souls.

if he believes mind flayers' souls have been destroyed, and fiend warlocks will all have their souls sent to the hells after death, then becoming a mind flayer isn't the worst possible way for him to die. he would never become a mindless monster to save his own soul, but he's not gripped by horror the way that some of the other origin characters are. lae'zel has been made revoltingly impure to her people, astarion is terrified of losing the scrap of bodily autonomy he just regained, gale is guilt-ridden over the orb detonation if he dies, shadowheart has to survive to prove herself to her cult leader, and karlach has also just regained bodily autonomy and is desparate to live.

this is just another quest for the Blade, whose persona guards wyll ravengard against the vice of self-concern when he ought to be concerned for those in need.

#wyll ravengard #bg3 #writing a wyll pov thing in order to roleplay harder in my durge playthrough & ive become obsessed w him #i love him so much. he doesnt even really get to realize in-game how traumatized he is and in act 3 he has not healed any really #come here wyll we are going to learn about self care. you & durge need to overcome the desire to give up your lives for your fathers ideals #faerun doesnt have LMHCs so wyll gets my durge who currently thinks he is (a miserable failure of) a cleric of ilmater. #this fic is practice for my 'ascended tavastarion struggle to quit being Like That' character study thing wherein i am struggling w dialogu #loving working on both. im in my little dollhouse making my toys try out lines until they fit #vampireposted

[amphibianaday]

day 1421

#uh just a heads up if you expand the tags to see all there's. a lot. very long #amphibian #frog #poison dart frog #based on my most popular frog to date (day 651) #inspired by everyone pointing out what they think it looks like #here's a fun secret fact the original guy is actually a phantasmal poison dart frog (Epipedobates tricolor) #(according to the original artists title of the drawing) #not Anthony's poison arrow frog (Epipedobates anthonyi) #i feel too awkward to really point it out though because they look the exact same. i cannot tell if there is a difference #im half convinced the same frog was just discovered and named twice #its very curious btw if you go on the (english) wikipedia page for either species it doesn't mention the other #while hereptiles.info (no idea if this is a trustworthy site) lists both names as common names for the same frog (incorrectly??) #while inaturalist lists them as two different frogs. curiously with tricolor having wayyyyy fewer photos #ok anyway that's my rant i went on a whole journey trying to figure out if these are the same frog or not and i have no answer #i did some more 'research' and i am more confused. some sources seem to imply they are now considered the same species ( e. tricolor) #i think my conclusion is i am willing to agree the drawing looks more like e. anthonyi. it seems like tricolor is generally less vibrant re #and the white is darker and more green? #i feel like thumblr should stop me from typing more in the tags at this point this is a whole essay #at this point i am failry convinced this is specifically the Santa Isabel frog. isthat the real subspecies or morph or whatever #or just the name pet sites are using to sell it?? #i even found some sources (frog selling websites) refering to it as “Epipedobates Anthonyi 'Santa Isabel' Phantasmal Poison Dart Frog” lol #Anyways if you read this far hi. species are confusing. i am not a frog scientist #the first few tags are like an hour old now i just kept trying to figure it out and adding more tags