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#proper grammar
allo-frouto · 5 months
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Can you plese take my cock down your throat?
Please*.
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bender-of-life · 3 months
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Crash Course in Grammar
I've noticed a lot lately that people my age genuinely do not know the difference in some words and I'm posting this as a little guide.
you're = you are your = posessive there = a place they're = they are their = possessive to = not sure how to describe this one too = inclusive
Hopefully this helps when trying to figure out your messages.
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glamurai56 · 1 year
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Flap Slapper
A Female 'WANKER', a woman who masturbates far to much, Or is just really annoying and irritating!!!!
"My boss is a right Flap Slapper!!"
by Skinuss May 15, 2008
Fucking marvelous...
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junkieboyfriend · 1 year
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Fuck your French teachers, iel is the new gender pronoun for a singular person identifying as they/them; it was recently introduced into the dictionary.
Get yassified
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littlemizzlinguistics · 5 months
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Studying linguistics is actually so wonderful because when you explain youth slang to older professors, instead of complaining about how "your generation can't speak right/ you're butchering the language" they light up and go “really? That’s so wonderful! What an innovative construction! Isn't language wonderful?"
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luciaainsanity · 1 year
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scery
How come when someone is talking to me over text, seeing a normal message directed towards me is fine, but when it ends with a . I get nervous??
i.e. "hello" vs "hello."
Idk what it is it's just slightly more menacing to me 😭 (if i'm roleplaying with someone that's different) does anyone else feel like this or am I just dramatic??
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kimcoxauthor · 1 year
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Writing Fundamentals Series
Writing is one of the most fundamental skills a person can possess. Whether you’re writing for personal expression or for professional purposes, it’s important to understand the basic principles of good writing. In this article, we will explore the fundamental principles of writing and how they can help you become a better writer. Clear Communication One of the fundamental principles of good…
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ltbunny · 3 months
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creepy, pervert, boyfriend Mactavish is my roman empire
(fat reader because I'm feral and soap would little gnaw on your tummy like a chew toy [he loves you], excuse my grammar, English is my first language, I'm just bad at it)
CW: dub con-ish, unsolicited pics, consensual somnophillia,
Definitely sends pictures of you to the group chat cause he's so smug about having you,
Soap🧼
look at my bonnie baby
*attachment photo*
2:43am
its a picture of you sleeping against his chest, cuddled up, the flash of the camera in the dark room catching your back rolls and ass, his hand groping your ass and Johnny's smug grin in the back, somewhat visible but really not the center frame.
He sends another attachment, his mouth on your tits as he grins in the camera again, centre frame with your chest this time, maybe even a little video of him sucking your tits while you stir in your sleep, making little noises that go straight to his dick (and gaz's. he's the only other one up right now. simon and price wake up at 5am, they'll see it later)
He always sends more than he intended, but he can't help it, especially when he knows the boys like the pictures too. You're so soft and pliant when you're asleep, letting him spread your legs with ease, no panties, soap convinced you to let his second favourite girl (debatable) breathe, no panties on at night, same goes for his lil swimmers.
You said it was okay....right?
Yeah.
He can use you when you're sleeping, as long as he doesn't yowl like an animal and fuck you awake every night, once in a while is fine, he gets it, he's loud and he wants his pretty girl to have her beauty sleep but its been like 4 days and his cock is hard. Four days is long enough.
He looms over you and strokes his hard cock over your pussy, breathing heavy, his eyes never leaving your soft peaceful face, cooing nasty words with a soft voice.
And.... maybe the sleeping arrangements are fine, but the pictures aren't really... discussed... but that's just for him and the boys. You'll never find it anyway. What you don't know can't hurt you. The group chat could have confidential information! That's what he told you. He lets you go through whatever you want on his phone, nothing to hide, no girls, no cheating, expect his little hen. He says the gc, 'one-four-one', could have sensitive work stuff in it, and obviously, you trust him. You never peer or peak in the group chat. (Not like it has any top secret messages anyway. Why would anyone send confidential information in a whatsapp group chat? Silly girl, he muses, at least this way she won't see anything in the group chat..)
"Fuck, mo luaidh, ye so fucking sexy for me, even when all ye doing is breathing, it's like ye wan' me to cum all over that pretty pussy, your tits are going up and down, doll, fuck you want me to suck em again that bad?"
He grins manically to himself, leaning down and sucking your nipple again, groaning, stroking his cock faster, wanting to cum all over that pussy, it's been a while since you've shaved and he loves it, makes the cum stick better. He leads the tip down to your clit, shuddering at the warmth on his tip, rubbing it along the clit.
Cums right there, on your pussy and outside too, some splattering up to your soft tummy, he grins and snaps another pic.
Soap🧼
Call me Picasso cause i just made some art
*attachment photo*
3:08am
Gaz🧢
Fucking beaut
Get it pumped as the Scottish say
3:09am
He grins at Gaz's text and throws the phone off to the side. He ain't done yet.
(Price and Ghost have Samsing you can't convince me otherwise, soap probably has a fucking Huawei but let's just settle with iPhone for now, Gaz has an iPhone and a burner phone)
(You wake up sticky, covered in dried and some globs of cum and with a weird, salty taste in your mouth, you groan and roll your eyes)
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cheesecakethots · 7 months
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The soft smile on Chrollo’s lips quickly forms into a smirk. He debates whether he should reveal himself yet, but decides against it, leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed. You’re too cute for your own good.
You’re too busy checking yourself out in the mirror to notice his presence, wearing that dark black coat that’s usually on him. It’s much too long for you, scraping against the floor with each little turn you do.
He sighs, seating himself on the sofa on the opposite side of the room. Might as well get himself comfortable, as this is ten times more entertaining than anything he’s ever seen.
You spin around, probably to watch the coat twirl with you, but mid-spin you catch sight of him and almost topple over.
He’s watching you with a fist propping his chin up, eyes soft and relaxed, and the sight has your chest feeling constricted.
You press a hand over your beating heart, panting a little while embarrassment settles in your bones. God, he’ll never let you live this down. He had told you he was out for the day, you didn’t expect him to be back until much later, the lying bastard.
“You- You could’ve said you were there!”
Chrollo chuckles, his tone as gentle as always, “But why would I interrupt such a lovely moment? You seemed to be enjoying yourself, my dear.”
Despite the innocence in his words, you can practically smell the smugness wafting off of him.
“Don’t read too much into it!” You blabber out, quickly shrugging the admittedly comfy coat off of your shoulders, “I was just curious, okay? It looked super warm.”
He grins, “Curious?”
Fucking asshole.
You take off the coat, holding it up to him, “You can have it back. It reeks of you anyway, I don’t want it.”
The spider doesn’t say anything or even move from his seat, instead simply raising an eyebrow in a playful manner, and lifting a hand up as a signal for you to come over and pass it to him.
Your eyes narrow. “Nuh-uh. You come get it. I’m not your maid.”
His smile widens. “While I must admit the imagery of you in said uniform is… pleasing, I’m not treating you as such. I’m comfortable here, and you’re the one who got it out, aren’t you, darling?”
The gaze that’s locked onto you is full of amusement, and two of his fingers beckon you forward.
With a glare and eventual sigh, you move closer, still holding the coat out. “There, you can grab it now, you laz- ah!” Your words are cut off when his hand reaches out like some snake attempting to wrap around helpless prey, latching onto your arm and tugging you into his lap. He catches the coat that slips out of your hands, holding it up with one for you to see.
“There, now I have it.”
“You pervert!” You cry out, legs kicking to no avail. The man laughs, unwavered by your petty struggles as he lays a hand to rest atop one of your thighs and leans closer so that he can whisper in your ear, “Oh, if only you knew.”
His mouth quickly lands on your neck, laying passionate kisses down it. You feel your face grow hot, especially when a quiet moan leaves him, his hands holding you all the more closer.
“Next time,” he murmurs, his voice deep and lustful, “you should consider wearing only the coat.”
You’re not sure if you want to slap the smirk off his face or kiss it.
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steddieas-shegoes · 26 days
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"so you're telling me that you helped them find all the eggs on the bus?" steve asked, arms folded across his chest.
"yes! they couldn't even reach a few of them. you hid them too high," eddie unwrapped another chocolate egg and shoved it in his mouth.
"yeah, the goal was to keep some hidden so we wouldn't have them bouncing off the walls while we're stuck on here for another six hours."
eddie stopped chewing his candy, looking over at their two daughters who were currently arguing over who got to keep the $1 bill and who got to keep the four quarters from one of the eggs.
"i thought the goal was to find them all?"
"yeah, eventually. all the obvious ones were for today and then tomorrow one of us would 'find' the last handful of them and give out the candy over the course of the day." steve snapped his fingers at the girls and gave them his 'you better chill out' look. "now they're all in a mood and probably want to run around, but can't."
"oh."
"yeah, oh." steve sighed. he gestured to their son, who was too young to care about money, but definitely not too young to care about candy, shoving a handful of jelly beans in his mouth. "how do you plan on entertaining him?"
"he can play my guitar or something."
"and what do you suggest we do with the girls?"
"pawn them off on jeff and his wife on the next stop? they need practice anyways."
steve snorted. it wasn't a bad idea necessarily. but there was no way they'd be on their best behavior and steve wouldn't put anyone else through that.
"how about we stop for some food to help soak up some of that sugar?" steve suggested, knowing they still had about two hours before they were scheduled for a stop. bribing the driver would be pretty easy, especially if they let him pick where they went. "one of us can hide the rest of the candy while they're off the bus."
"fine, but they'll be mad when they get back."
"and they can stay mad," steve laughed. "but they can stay mad at you for it. i was the bad guy yesterday when i said no to ice cream. it's your turn."
eddie's jaw dropped. "but i'm never the bad guy!"
"yes, my point exactly." steve turned to grab bottles of water for the kids. maybe flushing it all out of their system would help. "i'm taking the title of cool dad for the day."
"robin would be so disappointed in you," eddie grumbled.
"robin's been trying to get me to loosen up for years. she'll be proud of me."
eddie wrapped his arms around steve, ignoring the sudden screech from their oldest daughter for another moment.
"i'm proud of you too. i can be the bad guy more often if you want."
"nah. i kinda like what we have." steve leaned in to kiss him quickly. "but i'm gonna soak it in today. might get a little worked up seeing you be the guy doling out discipline today, though."
"you're ridiculous. i discipline you plenty."
"dad! she took both of the dollars!"
"i found both of them!"
"actually, i found both of them," eddie said as he turned to the girls. "and if there's arguing, i get to keep them both."
the girls looked back at him with wide eyes, chocolate around their mouths, and sticky fingers from whatever taffy they'd gotten into first.
"but you already have all the money! you're an adult!"
steve covered his mouth to hide his laughter, turning to their son, who was a little too quiet for the amount of peeps he'd eaten an hour ago.
he wasn't at the table anymore.
"alright, maybe we'll both have to be the bad guys today," steve sighed. "luke! where'd you go?"
"how does he disappear on a moving bus?" eddie asked as he made his way to the couch to figure out the money situation with the girls.
it was their first, and probably last, easter on the tour bus. they normally spent all holidays at home.
but as steve tugged luke's legs from under steve and eddie's bed, giggling along with his three year old son, he couldn't help smiling at the chaos.
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friendzoned61 · 2 months
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In like. A really big iron lung mood with marks hair cut. Like REALLY BIG.
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badnew2005 · 11 months
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SUNNY IS A LOVE STORY @badnew2005
Lighthousekeeping, Jeanette Winterson | @boymiffy | @maccymacdonald | Rob McRlhenney, Philadelphia style | Is the Cast of Always Sunny Irredeemable? ceicocat | True Blue, boygenius | @dennisboobs | @starpeace | @chilledmac | @bitseventimes | Rat A Tat, Fall Out Boy | Its Always Sunny In Philadelphia (2005-)
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zeetickles · 5 months
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i love it when a lee is getting tickled and they start saying “please” , please what??? please tickle me more?? please find my most sensitive spot??? please never stop????
you’ve gotta finish your sentences sweetheart, or no one will understand what u want :)
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graysbullshit · 8 months
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a list of brazillian fun facts you might want to know for your qsmp fanfics! (or in general lol)
DATING IN BRAZIL (because I know at least 50% of yall are gonna be writting slash):
Phase 1 can be or texting/talking or ficando (infinitive: ficar), it depends on how shy you are;
Ficando means to be actively seeking a person out consistently with the intent of talking for a bit and then making out (it does not entail any level of loyalty);
Brazillians only consider it "making out" if you french kiss;
Kissing without tongue is considered weird and viewed negativelly;
A little peck on the lips is cute, but not really what we consider kissing;
There are two types of brazillians: the ones that will start dating after a week and the ones that take months to make up their minds;
If a brazillian is interested in you (even if you don't know each other) and you're in a party there is a very good chance they will walk up to you and ask if you want to make out/ask for your instagram handle (it depends on what kind of party it is tbh);
Also, most brazillians kiss and tell lmao;
It is not uncommon for outgoing brazillians to make out with random strangers, especially during carnival;
We are a sex positive country mostly;
We are very sensual, even if we have no romantic interest;
Mock-flirting or Joke-flirting is very common in friend groups;
People who make out/date with the person their friend likes are called Talarica or Talarico;
When you get cheated on you're called Corno;
People usually go on dates after ficar for a whille;
Usually, if you're going on dates with someone it is expected of you to be faithful or to end things (you can't go on dates with a guy while also going on dates with another guy, that's fucked up);
We call dating namorando, from the infinitive namorar which refers back to namorado (boyfriend) and namorada (girlfriend);
brazillians are typically very direct when they are interested in someone, which doesn't mean they will say "oh, i like you" right away, but they will flirt for sure;
in Brazil saying "I love you" isn't a big deal, most brazillians will say it pretty fast and not saying it back (if you're in a relationship) is considered VERY WEIRD;
brazillians have the tendency of being very jealous lmao;
GEOGRAPHY:
Brazil is a continental sized country, being the fifth biggest country in the entire world. It is bigger than the USA, if counting only directly conected land (ignoring Brazil's islands and Hawaii and Alaska);
Because of it's size, brazillian states have a great number of differences in language, culture, food, climate, and politics;
There is as much animosity between states as in the USA (the difference being: brazillians will always defend each other rather than gringos);
The brazillian streamers are all from the Center-West, South-East and South of Brazil (unfortunatly there is nobody to represent the North and North-east);
The south-east is the are of biggest economical impact, while the center-west is known for the capital of the country (Brasília) and the agriculture, while the south has a terrible reputation (they have livestock too, but mostly a bad reputation);
Brazil has two of the biggest cities in the world: the 5º biggest, São Paulo, and the 19º biggest, Rio de Janeiro;
Nobody fucking likes São Paulo (the city) except from the people that were born there or lived there their entire lives;
Brazil has a mostly warm climate, and most brazillians consider anything below 20ºc to be cold (vai sulista, fala que no sul é mais frio, fala);
Brazil's seasons are more often defined by the level of humity, rather than how hot/cold it is;
Brazil is a giant when it comes to agriculture and livestock. We have a lot of grains, and red meat. If you drink coffee and eat meat you have definetly tasted brazillian products without knowning, since we do a lot of exportation (especially to europe);
Brazil has natural diamonds, pre-sal (which can be used in the making of combustives), gold and other precious stones.
HISTORY:
Brazil was mostly colonized by the portuguese, but there was also a presence of the Spanish, French, Dutch and British. You can tell by the architecture;
Rio de Janeiro was the capital of the Portuguese Kingdom for a little while;
Brazil (much like Mexico) was once an Empire;
Brazil (as it's own coutry) has had only two Emperors;
the Brazillian Empire was a big deal despite ending fairly soon;
Brazil's Empire once eliminated about 90% of the male population of Paraguay during a war, which is def a war crime. We have repayed them for what happened, though;
Cities like Rio de Janeiro have a lot of Imperial architecture, but most of the colonial architecture can be found in states like Minas Gerais;
Brazil sent troups in WWII to Italy, the famous Smoking Snakes;
Brazil was forced into a dictatorship by the USA (surprising no one);
Brazil had a president that decided to develop highways instead of trains (i fucking hate him). It's the same guy that moved the capital from Rio de Janeiro to Brasília;
Brasília was build with the blood of poor people and it fucking sucks, but it has the shape of an airplane so everything is fine ig /s;
Brazil's first woman president and it's current president were both tortured during the dictatorship;
Brazil is a concervative country, despite everything;
Do not ask me about Brazil's politics, because it's so fucking insane lmao;
GENERAL CULTURE:
Brazillian culture exists on top of three axes: Portuguese, African, and Indigineous;
We take A LOT from Japonese culture (since we are the country with the biggest Japonese population outside of Japan). I've never met a brazillian who hasn't watched anime, even my grandma knows what Pokemon is /srs;
Some other important diasporas in Brazil: Lebanon (we have more lebanese than Lebanon itself lol), China, Germany, Italy, and many different African countries;
Most brazillians listen to funk and sertanejo, but other brazillian music you might be interested in: samba, BRrock, mpb, BRpop, Axé, and Pagode;
Some other famous brazillians you might not know, but you should: Silvio Santos, Celso Portiolli, Rodrigo Faro, Angélica, Eliana, Xuxa, Luciano Huck, Pyong Lee, Mauricio de Sousa, Ariano Suassuna, Clarice Lispector, Machado de Assis, Guilmarães Rosa, Fernando Pessoa, Vinicius de Moraes, Toquinho, Mateus Hwang, Tiago Leifert, Tadeu Schmidt, Boninho, Guilherme Briggs, Fernanda Montenegro, Rodrigo Santoro, Wagner Moura, Seu Jorge, etc;
Most brazillians only drink tea for medicinal reasons (like cammomile tea);
Most brazillians love coffee and hate iced coffee;
Most brazillians start drinking coffee at a very young age;
Drinking (alchool) age in Brazil is 18yo, but most brazillians start drinking around 15yo;
Most brazillians love meat and barbecue. Here is a picture of a brazillian brabecue:
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Brazil, differently from other American coutries, didn't have potatoes/corn as it's basic food, we had a root called Mandioca. Although it is still very beloved in brazillian cusine, the base for brazillian meals is currently Rice;
In Brazil we usually don't eat a lot during breakfast, but have a big meal (with rice, veetables, meat, and beans) for lunch and dinner. And our dinner is usually around 20h-22h;
We don't use AM or PM;
We use the metric system and Celcius, and we very much deslike the imperial system and what's-his -face is an abhorrent scientific disgrace;
brazillians who suck up to gringos are called "Vira-latas", which can be translated to "mutts" or more directly "eat-trash";
brazillians have mutiple coffee breaks during the day, mostly in the afternoon;
brazillians brush their teeth at least 3 times a day (mostly after every big meal);
brazillians shower at least once a day, some going as far as to shower three times a day during summer;
brazillians do not use snapchat and they think it's obsolete (because it is);
brazillians will pirate anything that isn't made by other brazillians, and I mean ANYTHING. There is no shame in pirating in Brazil and we are very proud of being the country that pirates the most in the world! We will also buy counterfeit products knowing they are counterfeit;
brazillians rivalry with argentinians is REAL. And, although is mostly a football thing, it really translates to everything else (especially if it's online);
brazillians have a hierarchy when it comes down to rooting for stuff, and it goes like this: brazillians, sibling countries, latin americans, other african countries, other third world countries, japan, other asian countries, european countries, anglo-saxon americans, argentina (if it's football), germany, portugal;
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halfmoth-halfman · 6 months
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My MWIII Thoughts
I’ve finally taken the time to get all of my thoughts about the new campaign together and put them in a single post. There are no spoiler tags since the game is officially releasing today/tomorrow, but everything is under the cut with a warning. I have a lot of things to say here, so I’ve tried to organize it point by point. The points I think are most important are first, and I ask that you take the time to read through them. If you want to skip to the points about characters and that death, the beginning of those sections is marked with red, but be prepared to scroll.
I watched the custscenes, with gameplay, all the way through once and I’m not doing it again. I tried to go back to specific scenes to reference in this post, but even that was a lot for me, so if my timeline in here is a little screwy don't fault me too much.
If you just want my quick, overall thoughts: This campaign was two hours of egregiously incoherent, poorly written, shoddily thrown together military propaganda, even more than the cod games usually are, and your money would be much better spent donating to help Palestine - there are links to do so in this review, marked with green, as well as boycott information, and the same donations links are also provided on this shorter post if you want to go directly to them.
(There are spoilers below, and this is long. I'm not kidding. Do not click the readmore unless you are prepared to scroll.)
Military Propaganda/Islamophobia
I spoke about this some already here and here because I felt this was an important enough topic that deserved its own post.
Call of Duty has never been has never been the game where I expected to see proper representation of the Middle East or Middle Eastern politics. It is first and foremost military propaganda. More than that it is American military propaganda. Just like with every superhero and pro-military movie post-9/11, it should be expected that you’re not going to get any kind of meaningful insight or depth when it comes to Middle Eastern storylines and characters, but there is usually more of an effort to hide the Middle East = Terrorist subtext.
To say I was shocked at how overt and blatant the Islamophobia was in this game is an understatement. We get four deaths of named characters in this game. Two of whom are Middle Eastern women, Dena and Samara, from the country Urzikstan, the fictional combination of Syria and Afghanistan and home to terrorist group Al-Qatala (real subtle, right?). Both of these women are associated with the ULF, the Urzikstan Liberation Force, Farah’s group of freedom fighters whose goal is to free their country from foreign subjugation with Samara no longer being an active member. Both of these women are introduced in this game. Both of these women are minor characters. Both of these women, Samara in particular, are trying to live their lives peacefully now that their country has been freed.
Both of these women are given deaths more brutal and more shocking than the other two deaths of two main characters in the series.
We meet Dena at the beginning of the game when we’re first re-introduced to Alex and Farah. We see her have a heartfelt reunion with Farah, and the two have a conversation while driving where Dena expresses her concerns about wanting Urzikstan to remain peaceful but assures Farah that everyone will support her. After, Dena is suddenly shot in the chest, and Farah is forced to take control of the vehicle they’re in, which ultimately flips over and we get Farah’s first death fakeout.
It’s in this cutscene that we see a lingering shot on Dena as well as her corpse being thrashed in the car as Farah tries to take control and as it flips. We are given a Middle Eastern woman showing hope for her country that the peace she has fought for will be maintained only to then watch her die for shock value and a fakeout for another character, and watch her body fly across the car as it flips. We don’t get that with either of the other two gunshot deaths in this game. Soap’s is just as sudden, but we see it coming, and there are no shots of his body being thrown about, no closer views of his face like there are with Dena. Shepherd’s is entirely off-screen and all we’re left with is a shot of him lying face down on his desk - no blood or bullet wound in sight.
Notably, the only other person we see a comparable amount of blood on in this game is Makarov, the enemy of the series.
Samara, who gets the worst death in this game, in my opinion, is a retired ULF soldier we’re introduced to on a plane. I’ll start by saying I was under the assumption this may have been the reboot replacement for No Russian, the mission in which Makarov and Co. shot up Zakhaev International Airport to frame America for terrorism in the original series, and the mission that was teased after the credits in the MW2 reboot. We get the scene of Makarov and his men at the airport before boarding the plane, which could just be a nod to the original mission. However, until there is an official reboot of the No Russian mission, I’m going to assume this was Activision’s new take on it. 
In this mission, we learn that Makarov plans to use this plane bombing to frame Urzikstan, Farah and the ULF specifically. The thing is, as Big Mak and friends are in the airport preparing to board, we are shown that the ULF is already being blamed for the missile attack on Arklov Military Base from the previous mission where their missiles were stolen, capped with Konni’s chemical gas, and one was detonated. There’s even a news sequence showing that the world already thinks of the ULF as a terrorist organization, and has not-so-quietly thought that for years. That makes this upcoming scene feel not only unnecessary but like a deliberate choice made by Activision to be extra cruel to a Middle Eastern character. 
We see Samara text with her family and are shown a picture of her husband and children before the man next to her begins speaking to her in Arabic. He compliments her family and, I assume as we’re not directly shown, gets the No Russian text - a text, for those who have not played the original games, meaning to not speak Russian to not tie the terrorist act they’re about to commit back to the Russians. The Traveler, as he's called, then reveals that he knows who she is, knows her family, and knows that she is a former ULF soldier and fought the Russians. He then pulls a gun on her and Makarov and Konni take the plane hostage, purposely speaking Arabic and declaring this is for Urzikstan. 
We are then forced to watch as Samara fights back, but is ultimately taken to Makarov where a bomb is strapped to her chest. He gives his usual cryptic speech, and over-explains to the audience what’s happening before diving out of the plane D.B. Cooper style. 
Samara is then dragged to the back of the plane by a Hijacker, where the remaining passengers are, kicking and fighting and trying to reason with him to stop. He pauses and we then get this exchange:
Hijacker: Are you a terrorist?
Samara: No…
Hijacker: You look like one.
He then puts a gun in her hands, tosses the cellphone that will let her stop the bomb, and shoves her into a crowd where we have to watch her struggle to explain what’s happening to her and that she needs the phone to a crowd of people that are either afraid of or angry with her. She is shoved to the ground by a random man, forced to fight through people trying to tackle and beat her, and, when the phone is finally within reach in the hands of a scared passenger, the plane blows up. 
I want to emphasize that most of this is a cutscene. There are a few button presses for the player to try and get the phone, and you are allowed to look around and try to fight back, but that is quickly stopped, and you are forced to sit and watch through Samara’s perspective. The end result? There’s an investigation for who may have done this, and you play as Farah collecting evidence from the crash site so Makarov can’t frame the ULF. The mission succeeds, because it’s a story mission and it has to, Makarov is unable to control the narrative so people can only suspect the ULF did it but can’t prove it, and Samara…died for nothing. All of that was so people could suspect the ULF was a terrorist organization, which the game has previously gone out of its way to establish was already happening before Makarov got on that flight. This entire sequence and the mission after added nothing to the storyline other than the brutal forcing of a Middle Eastern woman to hijack a plane 9/11 style and die a death worse than two of the series’s main characters.
Two side characters, two Middle Eastern women who have never existed before this game, are put in this game solely to die in ways where their deaths are more emphasized and graphic than a character we’ve played as since the series began, and one of the main villains. 
There is a genocide happening in Palestine. Islamophobia in the United States, and the West as a whole, is rising to post-9/11 heights. There is already so much propaganda being spread in an attempt to dehumanize the men, women, and children who are being murdered by Israeli forces, to justify the actions - the war crimes - of the Israeli forces. Could this be a sloppy attempt at Activision trying to mirror real-life stereotypes and how quick the media is to jump to the Arab = Bad narrative? Possibly. I don’t think it is. I think this was a deliberate change from the original No Russian mission in which America is framed for terrorism, made by an American company that makes games meant to garner interest and support in the American military, during a time when the American government is being criticized for funding and aiding an ethnic cleansing. 
As slapped together as this game was, I don’t believe they couldn’t have changed the campaign in the time since the situation in Palestine escalated to this level. I firmly believe it was a purposeful choice to write that scene, to film that scene, to keep that scene. 
It is blatant, it is clear, it is as in-your-face as it can possibly be. It is not something this fandom gets to ignore because they don’t like the campaign. It is not something this fandom gets to overshadow with Soap’s death as poorly written as it was. It is not something this fandom gets to stay silent about while also posting about #freepalestine. 
I have never expected the best when it comes to Islamophobia from the Call of Duty games or its fandom. I’ve never expected anything beyond mildly okay. Call of Duty is military propaganda, I know. The fandom is known for its racism and it’s not getting better, I know that especially. But I don’t see how anyone, in the times we’re living in right now, would be able to look at this and not acknowledge it for what it is. 
It is the purposeful brutalization of Middle Eastern characters. 
It is propaganda.
It is racism. 
It is Islamophobia. 
It is wrong. 
Engaging Critically/Acknowledging Privilege
While I may be stepping back from the CoD fandom, I understand that not everyone is going to. For some people, these games are a comfort or an escape. I’m not here to call for a boycott of Call of Duty or Activision while there are more important boycotts to be focusing on - and you can find more info on them here & here.
What I am asking, particularly of those of us in the fandom that are not being directly affected by what’s happening in Palestine, is that there is more acknowledgment of the level of privilege that we have and that people learn to engage more critically with the media they consume. 
It is a privilege to play a game like Call of Duty and not have to think about the propaganda. It is a privilege (and ignorant) to say “it’s not political”, “it’s just pixels”, or “it’s not real”. It is a privilege to be able to just turn the game off and never have to think about war, and the impact of the representation of the characters, and the real-life events that these games base themselves on. And this isn’t just a CoD issue, this is something that should be considered with every piece of media you engage with. 
There is no such thing as a “politics-free” book/movie/game/show. Everything carries the biases - conscious or subconscious - of the person or people who created it. There is no such thing as media or fiction not having an effect on real life, especially in a fandom for what is essentially War Crimes: The Game.
I’m going to take a quote from this post by @yeyinde.
"It’s incredibly egregious to pretend that the media you consume isn’t based, in some part, on real life or has no repercussions outside of it just being fiction. And it’s especially dishonest to say this isn’t the case within the COD fandom when people have said that the erasure of Gaz from the fandom in favour of a white character is traumatising. The portrayal of the Middle East is traumatising. The portrayal of Makarov in fiction as an uwu-sympathetic babbie is traumatising. The portrayal of the military as heroes is traumatising. These are real people expressing real emotions and bringing up important matters that impact them long after they’ve logged out of tumblr. Just because they stop being relevant to you after that does not, and SHOULD NOT, matter. Their trauma, their feelings, and their interpretations shouldn’t be ignored in favour of some catch-all excuse to limit your responsibility as a consumer to think critically about the media you’re devouring just because it has no consequences for you."
Fiction mirrors real life whether you want to admit it or not. It shows real biases, and it affects real people. Participating in fiction and the surrounding culture does not magically absolve you of consequences. It does not suddenly mean you get a free pass at things like sexism, racism, ableism, colorism, romanticization of abuse and sexual assault, etc. just because your escapist fantasies are conveniently free of people who are different from you.
It may be your fiction, but it is someone else’s non-fiction, and you do not get to decide that it isn’t or that the impact doesn’t matter because it’s about fictional characters.
I'm going to link another post from @yeyinde with another quote here.
"It’s easy to get swept up into something when you have no tangible ties to the effects of what’s being portrayed, which can lead to making dismissive or hurtful statements out of pure ignorance. My biggest gripe was the excuses being laundered out and (either unintentionally or intentionally) giving the creators a pass for what they created and the harm they caused other people to experience. Just because they did not experience the same trauma, it does not diminish its impact on others. This is a very important distinction, which I think was being missed."
Does this mean you can’t ever write or read about traumatic things, or that you can’t enjoy the CoD games ever again? No. 
But I need you all to understand that you can criticize the media you enjoy. You should criticize the media you enjoy. Criticism does not mean never letting yourself enjoy a piece of media again. Criticism does not mean trying to get a character or creator “cancelled”. Criticism does not automatically equal hate.
Criticism is an act of love, and it is necessary when deconstructing and confronting biases - both yours and other people's.
Resources To Support Palestine
The lovely @moondirti provided some organizations where you can donate to support the humanitarian aid in Gaza with the note:
It's important to acknowledge that, while limited aid is being allowed through, recent negotiations have allowed your charity to reach the people of Palestine.
DOCTORS WITHOUT BORDERS
PALESTINE CHILDREN RELIEF FUND
UNITED MISSION FOR RELIEF – PALESTINE EMERGENCY
ANERA
Onto the actual game.
The 141
I don't know what happened during development between this game and MW2, but the relationship between the members of the 141 is severely lacking. We get the usual Soap and Ghost banter for one mission, because, let’s be real, that's what got a lot of people into the last game, but that's about it? There’s nothing new, nothing added to their relationships, and the game sticks to the same duos (Ghost/Soap & Price/Gaz) that we’ve had for the past two games. Even Soap and Ghost’s banter during the attack on Milena’s private island doesn’t have the same impact on the characters as their banter during the Alone mission in MW2. They get a few lines about Soap admiring Milena’s cars and Ghost taunting him about marrying an Oligarch, and…that’s it until the cutscene where they interrogate her.
There’s maybe a few quippy lines here and there, but overall the 141 gives off the same feeling as a group of semi-friendly co-workers that sometimes work on the same project rather than an actual team that has shed blood, sweat, and tears with each other.
This would’ve been such a great time to explore deeper into the team dynamics, show us pairings we don’t get to see as often and build on those relationships, make us really feel for these characters on a personal level. In the original series, you got a feel for every character and their team dynamics, and the player felt the impact of each death as they watched the other characters react (something I’ll talk about later). With this game, we get…what? Four men that desperately need a lozenge throwing a few sassy one-liners at each other and giving each other a harsh pat on the back like a bunch of dads at a barbecue?
I feel like so much of the heavy labor regarding the 141 in the reboot is done through fanfiction at this point because this game especially gives us barely anything to go on, and that’s such a missed opportunity on Activision’s part considering how so much of MW2’s popularity came from the relationship built between Soap and Ghost. It all just feels so hollow and surface-level; there’s no depth here, no attempt to build a connection from the player to this group as a team. In my opinion, Activision relies too heavily on the older fanbase’s connection to the original series, and the newer fanbase’s self-created characterizations, to fill in the blanks so they can leave these characters as empty and vanilla as possible in order to appeal to a broader audience.
And they’ve still somehow managed to fail at that. Speaking of failing...
Graves and Shepherd
Graves should’ve died in that fucking tank, and I will stand by that opinion even after I die. It was such a cop-out to have him live, and for him to suddenly come back with the excuse, “Well, I wasn’t in that tank, blah, blah, blah.”
This is supposed to be a game series where characters die and stay dead. The characters die. Some die heroically, some die horrifically, some die quickly, some die painfully slow, most die bloody, but they die. It’s a staple of the series, like Game of Thrones pre-season 5. I don’t know if Activision didn’t know what to do with his character, or if they realized he was semi-popular with the fans and decided to magically bring him back via deus ex remote-controlled tank, or if they were trying to “subvert expectations” and give us all a little surprise plot twist, but it sucked.
Also, no one checked the tank for a body? That seems to be something everyone has a problem doing in these games, and I don’t know what Activision thinks that does for the 141, but what it does do is make these elite military officials look incompetent as hell because their “dead” enemies keep coming back.
There was nothing different that Graves did in this game from what he did in the previous game. We get the same air support mission from him that we got last game, and really that���s it. Okay sure, he’s working with Farah now, that’s a little different, but what did he do in that mission? Give her vague instructions on where to find some GPS trackers and then give her more vague instructions on where to find the missile containers to slap the trackers on? He could’ve easily been replaced with one of Farah’s people who scouted ahead, or Alex, or a decorative cowboy hat, and the mission would have gone the exact same.
Other than that he spends the entire game hiding behind Shepherd like a scared child up until the end when he ultimately turns on Shepherd, and even that felt so blah. He faces no consequences for his (racist) actions in Las Almas other than Gaz refusing to shake his hand, he faces no consequences for betraying the 141, going so far as to lie that it even happened in front of Congress, and he gets off completely free as far as we know. There was no point to his character, no point to bringing him back, no point to him being in this game at all, and if I find the Activision employee who decided to keep him alive I will be throwing hands expeditiously. 
Shepherd was…there, I guess? I’m sure he was meant to be a menacing, sly, back-stabbing character, but he came off as more irritating than anything. His rescue mission felt akin to being forced to babysit your annoying younger sibling who questions everything you do. They give you a cute little nod to the OG series with his cutscene with the 141 in the snow (because Activision has to rely on nostalgia and easter eggs since they know this game is emptier than the promises of an absentee father), but most of it is spent with Shepherd preaching about how great he is and threatening the 141 like he’s been doing the entire game. I’m sure he’s supposed to come off as clever, outsmarting the 141 and tricking them into rescuing him - this big, bad, battle-hardened General - but all of that is undercut by him getting captured to begin with.
The General Shepherd in the original series killed two of the player characters. How am I supposed to be intimidated by this nagging grandpa briskly jogging through the snow behind me in his ugly pajama jumpsuit? Even his ending is lackluster. He’s outwitted in front of Congress by Graves of all people, and then we get a cutscene where Price shoots him off-screen. That’s it. There was no satisfaction like in the original series, no triumph, no sense of vengeance, only a tired feeling of thank god I don’t have to deal with this anymore. This constant attempt at build-up in this reboot series of Shepherd being this looming figure over the 141 ends not with a bang, and not even with a whimper.
Makarov
I’m going to start this off by saying I mean absolutely no hate to Julian Kostov, Makarov’s actor, he definitely did his job.
Unfortunately, that job was playing a random Russian man that happened to have the same name as the Vladimir Makarov from the original series. He’s literally just a dude. There’s nothing particularly menacing about him, nothing that really screams Leader of an Ultranationalist group, nothing that would set him apart in a line-up of kind-of-gruff white men. I wasn’t expecting him to be some over-the-top supervillain, but he feels too normal, too regular, too everyday. Maybe that was the point Activision was trying to make - that having a villain with too-sharp features, eyebrows with in-your-face arches, and two-toned eyes is realistically too much - but it feels like they leaned too far in the opposite direction to compensate.
How am I supposed to take Makarov seriously when they gave him such big, brown, babygirl eyes? Though I realize this may be a character model issue because everyone in this game seemed to have huge doe eyes at one point or another (looking directly at you and those unblinking baby blues, Soap).
The first time we get a proper cutscene with Makarov, he shoots one of his own men – one who had questioned his plan in the rescue mission – and he gives some passionate Make Russia Great Again speech that involves a lot of big gestures, promises of showing the world “true power”, and him being weirdly touchy with one of his men. It’s not a bad scene, and I think Julian really shines here as Makarov. It’s a little in-your-face for me, but overall not a bad introduction to what is supposed to be the overarching big bad for the rest of the series. It gives you a good enough sense of danger, and just enough worry for the main crew as they get ready to go up against this guy.
Unfortunately, the rest of the game doesn’t really follow through on that. Makarov spends more time monologuing, asking his men “philosophical” questions about prisoners and guards, and cryptically foreshadowing at the 141 than he does doing…anything. We are told about all of the bad deeds he’s done. We are told how evil he is. We are told that Makarov needs to be stopped at all costs. The only problem is, we aren’t shown any of that. We see the aftermath of Verdansk, a distant explosion after Makarov has been captured, but we never see Makarov do any of that. When we do get to see Makarov, his men are doing all of the dirty work while he stands around and looks evil. It’s his men fighting and killing guards to get him out of prison, his men attacking Farah and her soldiers, his men launching missiles topped with biochemicals, his men forcing Samara to blow up a plane, his men guarding Milena and his finances. The most he does during any of these scenes is order his men around and give evil villain speeches to give the audience exposition about why he’s doing all this.
We probably see more of Makarov’s shirtless Tinder pic than we see him in action. 
In the original series, we see Makarov being at the forefront of his movement, unafraid to get his hands dirty. He is part of the group that commits the massacre/terrorist attack on Zakhaev International Airport, he kills the two FSO agents protecting President Vorshevsky, he’s the one who shoots and kills Yuri, and that’s only part of what we see in-game. Sure, we’re told about his other crimes, but we’re shown enough to back up the claims that he is evil. In this game, he kills two people himself, one of them being his own soldier that I mentioned earlier, and the other being Soap (and we’ll get to that later). Two extremely lackluster deaths that are over before you get the chance to really digest them. Maybe he kills more people during the intro mission when you rescue him, but it’s during gameplay and easily missed when you’re too busy trying to fight your way out of this Arkham-esque prison. I think I could look past it if he wasn’t also present during some of the scenes where his men are carrying out his atrocities for him, but instead, Activision chose to have him in the background standing there…menacingly. 
I don’t want to say Makarov was a bad villain; he was certainly better than Shepherd and Graves. I just think Activision made very strange choices with his character that resulted in him becoming this weird mishmash of an average monologuing movie villain and the micromanaging boss that stands over your shoulder, and it took a lot of the “oomph” out of his character for me. 
Soap's Death
I hope whoever made this decision at Activision has to live the rest of their life constantly feeling like they have to sneeze and are never able to. What the fuck happened here? In what world did Soap’s death make any kind of sense here? This felt like they knew fans were expecting someone to die (and they already retconned the yeehaw war criminal) so they put a bunch of names in a hat and had some poor unpaid intern pick one out. 
I have not been quiet about how much death I wanted in this game. I expected at least two deaths, with one of them preferably being Price. Going into this I was prepared to lose characters, and I was prepared to lose them to a heroic sacrifice, to an exhaustingly epic gunfight, to an explosion in a clocktower, to literally anything, but I was not prepared to lose a character to bad writing. And that’s what Soap’s death was. There is no build-up to it throughout the game other than a cryptic, “I’ll see you again, MacTavish.” from Makarov in a flashback scene. There’s no exploration of Soap’s character arc, his background, his family. There’s nothing.
Price and Soap try to defuse a bomb, Makarov shows up and his men overpower them, Makarov goes for the kill on Price, and instead shoots Soap when Soap tries to stop him. The entire cutscene can be summed up as A Series Of Conveniences. Makarov conveniently gets to Soap and Price just as they’re about to defuse the bomb, the officers they have with them are conveniently incompetent to stop any of Makarov’s men, Makarov’s men conveniently don’t notice Soap getting up to stop him from shooting Price, Ghost and Gaz are conveniently one second too late save Soap, and a train conveniently passes by to let Makarov make his escape. It’s over in less than a minute, and there’s little to no reaction from the surviving 141 members before the game starts shoving in your face that there’s a bomb you have to defuse that has conveniently not gone off yet and was conveniently missed in all of the gunfire.
Aside from the bullshit way it happened, the most disappointing thing here was the cutting of Soap’s arc and the lack of reaction from Price, Ghost, and Gaz. There was no growth for Soap in this game, no building of his story that would make his death feel like a satisfying conclusion. We just got the same Soap we’ve had in the rest of the series, and then he was gone. And the fact that we got absolutely nothing from the team in that moment was so…frustrating. Yeah, Ghost kneels by his body, and gives a brief, “Johnny!” but that’s…it? Price says nothing. Gaz rushes to the bomb and says nothing. After that moment in the cutscene, Ghost says and does nothing. There’s not even a hitch in their voices as they finish disarming the bomb. In Soap’s original death, we got Price screaming and begging over his body. We got to see his grief and pain and hurt at losing someone so close to him. Here we get…them standing over the body, a cut to black, and then a funeral cutscene that doesn’t feel earned full of commiserations that feel empty, hollow, and generic. 
Maybe I’m too nostalgic for the Captain MacTavish we had in the original series, and the death they gave him that was impactful enough that people still talk about it to this day. Maybe there’s something meaningful here that I’m not seeing. Or maybe Activision can’t write for shit and rushed Soap’s death without a care just like they rushed this game as a quick cash grab to ride the hype of MW2.
Whatever the reason, these characters deserved far better.
Soap deserved better.
And I deserved to see a rebooted Captain MacTavish.
Gameplay
This section is going to be short because I didn’t spend money on this game to actually play it, I only watched gameplay. The general consensus seems to be that this game is nothing but glorified DMZ, and I can’t disagree with that. Supposedly, at least two of the campaign settings were ripped straight from Warzone, the Gulag and Verdansk Stadium, and I think that really shows how much of this game was slapped together because Activision wanted to hurry to release so they could capitalize off the CoD hype as much as possible. The combat is the same in every mission, the air support mission is as boring as ever, the NPC AI is all over the place, and the character models constantly shift from being really good to mobile game bad within the same cutscene.
I’m not saying I could do better, but I don’t think I could do worse. You can take that however you’d like.
The Writing/Storyline
Starting off, I’m going to say this with my whole chest:
Main story content should be in the main story, and not in optional or additional content.
Look, I don’t mind an easter egg here and there in DLC. I don’t mind the mention of a big bad in an extra, paid quest to build up hype. What I do mind is when the understanding of the main storyline of your game is dependent on things that happen in content that players are required to complete outside of the main game. 
Do you know how we found out Alex was alive? An optional Raid.
Do you know how we learned Graves was a little bitch and wasn’t in the tank? An optional Raid.
Do you know how we–
You get my point. These kinds of reveals should have been in the main storyline because they pertain to the main storyline. Otherwise, you have people reacting with confusion because the main campaign was all they played, and they were left under the assumption that Alex may or may not be dead, that Graves burned in that tank in Las Almas, that Farah’s brother (Remember him? Activision doesn’t.) was alive and out there somewhere, etc, etc. It feels like they’re trying to do what Marvel does when they interweave their cinematic universe with their television shows: leave references to things only the more committed audience - the audience who will watch every show, play every game, see every movie, buy every DLC - would understand while punishing everyone else. It feels lazy on Activision’s end, and cheapens any kind of suspense they may leave us with going forward.
I wouldn’t even be surprised to see something like “Oh, Soap died and Makarov escaped at the end of the main campaign? Just kidding! They revealed in the newest Raid that Soap actually survived, and Makarov got hit by that train at the end.”
Outside of that, the whole storyline just feels unnecessary. This whole game feels unnecessary. I know there are rumors that this was meant to be a DLC for MW2 that got extended into a full game because Activision wanted more money, and if I didn’t already believe that, the writing would confirm it for me. Nothing feels fleshed out. Not the story, not the plot, not the characters. It all feels very surface-level and shallow, like more of the exact same thing we got in the last game, but somehow worse. The banter between the 141 is just not there, the tell don’t show when it comes to Makarov, the rapid POV switching, it all feels so thrown together, so last minute, like the writers had no idea what they wanted to do up until release. 
One thing that really bothered me was the constant death fakeouts. It felt like every mission something awful would happen and one character would be left with their fate unknown in a dramatic cut to black as a cheap way to build suspense…only for that suspense to be immediately undercut by showing them alive in the very next cutscene. This happens with Farah (twice), Price, Alex (partially, there’s no cut to black, but there is a fakeout that he has been captured), and Laswell all within the first half of the game. At some point, it starts to get irritating and kills any and all suspense going forward. I was spoiled on Soap’s death, I knew it was coming before I watched the cutscenes, but by the time I got there, I was almost expecting Soap to show up in the next sequence without a scratch on him. Up until that point, I had stopped caring when characters were in danger because the writing led me to believe everyone was safe. There’s a way to build suspense, and every writer understands that, a majority of the time, less is more, so I don’t get how this went so unbelievably wrong. 
The characterization is also so weirdly off. In what world would John “Somebody has to make the enemy scared of the dark. We get dirty, and the world stays clean.” Price not immediately take a kill shot when he has Makarov in custody? Soap was ready to kill every person he talked to in this game, so why did he let Makarov live? Why would Gaz advocate for giving Shepherd a gun after his multiple betrayals that he shows no remorse for? Why would Farah continue to begrudgingly work with Graves after learning about Las Almas? Why is Makarov over-explaining his plans to his victims?
I’m not saying I expect Shakespeare-level writing from a Call of Duty game, but I expect something better than whatever this is. 
I don’t know who Activision hired for their writing team, but there are so many instances here where I almost have to believe that they may not have hired one at all.
Overall Thoughts
I wish I had a time machine so I could go back to who I was before I watched this campaign. This whole game was nothing but a DLC lazily stretched to two hours with assets taken from other games and a storyline that was slapped together using blindfolds, a dartboard, and too much alcohol. Please do not use your money to buy this game. Your money would be much better spent donating to help Palestine.
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willthespy · 8 months
Text
ironic that the gay guy that canonically smells like rain got paired with the actual sunshine bisexual
rain + sun = 🌈 last time i checked
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