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fumifooms · 3 months

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Laios Touden and autism; admiring the non-human

Do you think people exaggerate when they scream about Laios being autistic? Do you feel like it’s weird that so many people including autistics are so set on Laios, the problematic (but incredible and kind) king TM, being the most autistic that has ever autisticed? Why do we cheer on autistic people wanting to be monsters?? Isn’t that weird?

Well, of course it depends on the way it’s done, it can be done quite offensively, but long story short Kui blew it out of the park. The thing is, autistic people really do like monsters and animals and robots. Nonhuman does not mean subhuman, it just means Other. Feeling a connection with them has been shown to be an extremely common autistic experience for that very reason.

Because some people don’t understand why we autistic Tumblr Laios stans cheer “autism! Autism!” whenever he talks about monsters and feeling alienated to humans so! Here’s a post about how yes even research papers are analyzing the special connection we form with animals. I’m not even joking but Laios Touden & the mass cries of relatability with autistic people he gets and all the love for him could be used as study material and evidence for future papers because the link is that strong. Oh also I think it’s notable that being autistic and undiagnosed vs diagnosed makes a huge difference. In my experience as someone who was undiagnosed up until 18, it’s even more alienating to not know that there’s a reason why you’re different, being gaslit that you’re ‘normal’ and you just need to try harder and get with the program, etc. Personally when getting diagnosed I went through the 5 stages of grief because the thought of having been fundamentally different all your life (a difference which you will never be able to change) and mistreated for it when you weren’t “wrong” all along makes you unload all the anger and sadness and loneliness and sheer trauma you’ve built up over time. Like it’s world shattering.

So! Back to seeing dogs as family. Also I implore you to value experiential evidence when it comes to autism and other neurodivergences because brains are complicated and neurotypicals not being able to understand us well even with scientific research is like, a whole thing even though we’re right there speaking about how we feel and being right every time because the topic is literally us and how we experience the world.

Disclaimer for this whole post that, of course, no group is a monolith and everyone has different experiences or can diverge from the norm of the group, and that doesn’t diminish the validity of either side! Like, I know autistic people who have trauma with dogs and hate them. But, trends do happen, and in this case... Autism is very “My experiences with humans make me feel dehumanized in a bad and lonely way so instead I’ll dehumanize myself in a good and inspiring way”.

“I was treated like a failed human my entire life and you’re surprised that my response was to become a dog.” -Patricia Taxxon

It’s literally well recorded that autistic people relate to animals more than humans globally. With this post, besides spreading autistic Laios truthism and explaining why the portrayal hits so deep for so many, I want to show in what way this is a very specific experience and not looking at his character through an autistic lense really misses a lot of why he’s everything that he is. (Tacking allegedly onto here for legal reasons, different interpretations are valid etc etc /gen). This honestly isn’t super long though.

To define an important term, anthropomorphism in the studies and in this post means to attribute human traits to the nonhuman, which not only includes anthro furry designs but also animals irl, inanimate objects, and animated media as opposed to live action, to humanize them and empathize with them.

Paper: https://www.liebertpub.com/doi/10.1089/aut.2019.0027

“Dogs taught me how to hunt and socialize and work in groups”, Laios having internalized body language... So real so real. I, too, make a great dog impression. And I want to emphase the part that it helps greatly develop a sense of emotions and relationships! For Laios, he didn’t get along with kids his age, it was him, Falin and the dogs against the world. Since it’s a group of dogs too, it taught him group dynamics and social hierarchies (like with Falin being considered as being below the dogs in authority according to the dogs rip), and the importance of group coordination when hunting.

For me, I cannot like, concisely explain just how much animals were important to me developmentally. I also grew up with dogs, but like I vividly remember encounters with like hamsters as well just radically shaping my understanding of boundaries, the importance of giving something space and the way you interact with them and respect their side of it. Unlike humans they don’t really mask how they feel, it’s direct cause-effect reaction and data gathering. There are no words involved, so the focus on having a perfect phrasing and tone is gone, leaving just pure interactions.

There’s also no reason to mask how you feel either, and you don’t have to feel silly over wanting to form a connection and it showing, what, is the dog gonna laugh at you because you obviously want to make friends with it? Toshiro or Kabru might, but dogs and cats will just tell you to fuck off and leave it there worst case scenario. I often say that I think one reason Marcille is special to Laios and he feels comfortable around her is because she emotes INTENSELY, she gestures, she puts her whole body into it, her facial expressions are pretty exaggerated and her ears even emote too- like with a dog’s ears!

I think there’s def also things to be said about how he gravitated towards Izutsumi at first, all excited, was eager to sleep in the same bed as her, but in the Izutsumi sleep rating chart we see they really just casual and chill so it’s not a Laios talking to Shuro deep into the night situation just a “I like sleeping besides animals” situation and that is enough to hype him up. I love how he pet her in the extra about why Chil let her sleep with him too. He’s just so transparently eager to befriend her, even if in the end they weren’t all that compatible and he accepted that.

There are honestly so many examples I could give for this. Like Grandin the famous cow lady.

More about autism & empathy:

https://www.spectrumnews.org/news/double-empathy-explained/ (Also mentions a study in which groups of autistic, allistic then a mixed group played a game of telephone and both singular groups had similar levels of information retention, but the mixed group was significantly worse. As an autistic person yeah duh, obviously autistic people are different from one another and can have plenty of interpersonal issues, but communicating with other neurodivergent people feels pretty intuitive and straightforward and comfortable. One of the reasons why neurodivergent people tend to naturally gravitate towards each other I suppose.)

^ Paper: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5932358/ For good, extensive summary of why we relate to animals so much you can go to the “anthromorphizing and asd” section of the paper. This paper extends to our widespread liking of cartoons and robots as well. Ok so this is a whole thing I won’t get into here but this is a big reason why a lot of autistic people are agender leaning as well. Genders and queerness in general is a lot about social constructs, and being queer is being marginal to these, not fitting into boxes or challenging those social norms and conventions. Queerplatonic relationships are a great example of this, where the framework of the relationship is platonic but the intangible nature of what it is exactly is the point, not familial not anything but everything at once too, just adoration, I like to say having pets is a bit like it as well, bc obvi it’s not romantic and often not fully familial, very platonic but also sooo much cuddling and adoration and kissing and whatnot that you wouldn’t typically do with a friend or family member. I’ll talk about qpr and labels another day though.

I got carried away but queerness in Dunmeshi is something I 100% want to make a big post on one day. Experiencing the world with different guidelines and not registering things to have the same boxes, sigh. Personally I also relate to Laios on a gender level, “cis by default because I don’t care all that much but if I were to dig deeper I’m probably otherkin and I want to be socially associated with traits of monsters and animalistic rather than man/woman” sighh hard to be a cryptid in this day and age. I wish we had a term like furry but for monsters, I want to be in the fantasy or folk tale genre ty, like changelings. Goshh changelings... You know, the irl myth where people said their neurodivergent kids were fairies’ children instead of human. Diminished physical sense of self means I see myself as some unknowable black void aesthetic wise, but like in a way that simultaneously makes me feel seen. Like becoming a monster, losing your sense of self but also somehow just being simplified and seen for what you are, it’s weird to try and explain. This post is more about relating to the nonhuman than about seeing yourself as such, but like connect the dots right, that IS an important point of Laios’ character. It’s because our brains literally work different than allistics which makes us feel as other, but also because of social ostracization and functioning in a different way than society at large, living in the margin of society, being weird and non-conforming.

Meanwhile, animals and social norms... Like ok, showing your neck and rolling on the ground to show that you’re friendly and harmless and play biting might not be proper. But have you considered that it’s also fun and feels very intuitive. Play with a dog in the dog’s way I promise it is so nice and freeing. Play tug of war and growl back when they growl. Hiss at your cat to tell them they do something wrong, engage with them on their level.

Autism made social life hard, but it made animals easy. Do you have anyyy idea how good it feels to mask all day every day and feel constantly misunderstood or like you’re doing a performance but then you can just, drop all of that in the company of animals and they understand you. They understand you. You form an understanding and rapport so easily.

And this whole thing with Laios is so explicit too, with the Winged Lion saying “You’re sick and tired of the human world”. Notice the choice of words. Sick and tired of the human world. Exhausted from the constraints, sick of the mind games. It really isn’t as much about loving monsters as it is about loving the nonhuman. Relating to them because you feel that you can actually understand how they work and think, and feeling like they could understand you back as well. Animals are safe.

Like I could go on about how Laios admiring even just demi-humans like orcs is because they’re socially seen as non-humans more than any true physical thing, that they’re not bound by human society and its rules and live with their own lifestyle. But it would deal myself 1000 points of psychic damage and I am not ready to cry today. It’s idealization 100%, and like, Laios DOES want to be treated as human, to be valued, but it feels like an unreachable thing meanwhile becoming a monster is instant gratification and freedom and a sense that now no one will be able to hurt you in a way that reaches you, never again shall you be defenseless, and then if people dehumanize you then that only strengthens your sense of identity as a monster and UGHH ugh ugh.

And like. This post is a mess at this point but if you want to kinda delve into the more “why” then I recommend this Patricia Taxxon video essay. It starts out on a very different topic, but it’s all about autism and finding comfort in the inhuman. Long story short is othering made us like this also animals are just simpler to intuitively get along with.

So when I post this

I mean it. I really mean it when I say he’s me. I have never felt so seen. So many conflicting emotions all wrapped so concisely yet so intangibly woven into the whole storyline so subtly.

Not being depicted as a monster of an human being for feeling/having felt that way?? The manga understands you. The world can understand you. Other humans can understand you. You can bond with them. You can. And I think that’s a big part of Dungeon Meshi too- Laios opening up to others about how he really is and his interests, and all the bumps on the way but how it was the only way to truly get to know each other and bond. With the climax being Laios confronting head on his complex with monsters and humans, and his monster-loving side and animalistic side being exactly what saves the whole world, what saves humanity. Because Laios does value his friends, does think humanity has beautiful sides to it, he wants to help it thrive and eat and become more accepting, carving out a kingdom for misfits and demi-humans. At the end of it, transforming into a monster and being free is a daydream fantasy, and the reality of it is that Laios does belong in the world as he is, and does receive and give out love.

If you enjoyed this you’ll probably like some of my other Laios analysis! Here’s an analysis of his succubus and what it says about his relationships with other humans. And here’s an analysis about his relationship with Shuro from his perspective.

#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #laios touden #character analysis #i guess #dungeon meshi manga spoilers #spoilers #autistic laios touden #asd #autism representation #meta #draft so old it uses the old Tumblr post editor #it would be much better if i could put them side to side rip #i also wanna do an analysis trying to pin down his level of social awareness #i love that the monster story epic saga about misfits and your place in the world on an ecosystem level is just sooo autistic so perfect #this post has a weird structure but hopefully it can showcase some things and make ppl understand and others relate! I know we're out there #hiii therians how we feeling today. Brain chemistry is weird but ours is just wired different not broken #feeling self-conscious bc even with studies this is the equivalent of going 'trust me bro I get it' which usually doesn't go well with us #Humanity is beautiful <3333 Humans are social animals broski love yourself!!!

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janmisali · 1 year

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been a while since I've done this but check out this comment. what are they talking about (transcription under the cut)

/hj is simple. It just means when you see it, youre supposed to go, "ha". Not "ha, ha, ha" like fully laughing, or " " like its not funny, just "ha". Thats all it means. /j means you go "ha, ha, ha" and /s means dont get irritated because they are not serious. You dont have to laugh but you dont have to cry either. No tone indicator is created for you to go back to the text to figure out what the tone indicator means, because most people will never do that, hence the meaning is created by the response and not whats inside the text. Thats natural language for you. Created by people doing illogocal stuff, not logic. Technically it is logical though. Its just not using the logic you would assume it to. You cant just assume that. You have to take everything that can affect the creation of language into account.

The tone indicator is useful when you want some1 to react by something. There are these awkward moments when you in a group (irl) tell a joke and every1 half laughs, but one guy goes fully laughing and its weird. This tone indicator is so that every1 knows to half laugh so that people can know that online as well. Communicating just isnt created like a certain word in a certain place or some word combination always should create a defined response. Tone indicators just try to control that response, which is why they exist. Its not complicated.

And yes its too stupid imo, ive given up on real language a long time ago, created languages are much more interesting to me at least.

Let me just go off the track completely and also super personal and define autism, because why not. Ive tried to do this before but i feel like now ive found the tools to do it better. Autistic people are people who are sensitive to information. Any kind of information, any kind of sensitive. Any kind of sensitive includes being non-sensitive and sensitivity fluctuations. Any kind of information can be sound, visual information like light or subjective information like text and it includes information fluctions. That is why autistic people can be very smart. That is also why they can be very dumb. Or both at the same time.

For example, here you show extreme intelligence for making an 18-minute video about language that doesnt make sense by logic, which it doesnt, which is a pretty important realization, but you also show a little of assuming your logic is the best which it isnt. Your logic is unaware of how the logic that goes into creating that language we all speak. It is the average human that creates language, because natural language is the most accessible to the average human. And so you have to think how does/would the average human react. The average human will laugh when they see /hj. They need no reasoning, thus reasoning is not needed in the language. I could literally say a comment of "hi. /hj" and for the average 100 iq person, that is a good joke or not, and it needs no reason to be or not be. Thats why comedy is so hard because for the average person it needs no reason to be funny, hence it either is or isnt. The best laughs are the laughs that have no reason, because thats when your instincts take over and make you feel good about yourself.

We obviously know autism with lights and sound is pretty much chronic. But i wonder, how chronic are they with logic. Because you can certainly be less sensitive to certain kinds of logic and more sensitive towards other kinds, it just isnt generally included in autism since its pretty common in neurotypical people too. I would go as far and say that autism was created from people doing irrational things with logic, and surviving better because they bamboozeled the people that used logic, thus the genes caught on and were like, "bro, were currently just taking in information, and treating it like its random, and we survive better, how about we cut the middleman and just interpret the information randomly straight away since it seems to work so well". I could be wrong but if its true that there were no autistic people before or there arent autistic animals in any other group of animals, that could be the reason why - our ability to think better caused us to also be able to get confused by randomness, thus people acting randomly can cause people to get confused and thus have the randomly acting people survive better and thus evolution of genes can catch on to the way of acting and make it genetical.

#jan misali #youtube comments #autism

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astrum-medeis · 1 year

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Astro-observations 🪬🧿 pt. 2

Highlights: pisces, 12h, scorpio, leo, 5h, jupiter, asteroids, taurus, 2h, aquarius, 11h, uranus

🌙 Pisces/12H Moon or Venus loves to love and loves love itself. Romantic hero placement.

🫦 Do you want to seduce a Taurus or 2H Venus? Please all of their senses.

🧍I feel like significant Aquarius, 11th house placements and Uranus-Sun/Moon/Mercury/Asc/Chiron (esp. harsh) aspects tend to be in autism spectrum. I always find these in birth charts of non-neurotypical individuums. People with above placements may find themselves shunned and alienated a lot. They may have hard time making friends with peers because maturity level between them and their peers is like chalk and cheese. They may feel like they do not belong anywhere but universe. They are the black cat who chooses its own path.

👩‍💼 Asteroids Enterprise 9777, Industria 389 and Jobse 215463 will show you what job suits you the most.

🪐 The house of your Jupiter will show you where you're lucky.

E.g. Jupiter in 3rd house – you speak out beautifully in speech and in writing; you are eloquent and persuasive; you're lucky with words, it's your thing

🫠 Saturn in 7th house is such a depressing placement in my opinion. Unlike Chiron, you can not heal your Saturn because it's your karma. Natives have bad luck when it comes to partnerships. They tend to attract toxic people.

🖌️ Do you want to know what is your talent, where you were blessed? Use asteroid Talent 33154 and Bless 92891.

🦁 Almost every Windsor royal family member has a Leo or 5H placements in their big 6. Not surprised though. What is interesting, the King Edward VIII had an Aquarius rising which means he had got a Leo descendant. He abdicated the throne so he could marry his true love, Wallis Simpson (who had an Aquarius rising as well). Furthermore, Prince Harry who's got his Chiron in the 5th house and no Leo placements decided to cut off himself from royality.

🦂 Grigorij Rasputin had a Scorpio Rising, which is actually no surprise considering his entire life 💀 He also had uncommonly high stamina as befits a Pluto and Mars ruled person. And in the end they cut off his peepee and put it into a jar, lol

#astro community #astro notes #astro observations #astrology #aquarius #11h #astroworld #astroblr #scorpio #leo #5h #pisces #12h #taurus #2h

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olderthannetfic · 10 months

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I just can't deal with how US-centric fandom spaces are, now. I love Ao3, I really do, but I just can't with all these loud, obnoxious Americans anymore.

I'm not white. I'm not neurotypical. My first language isn't English. I've lived in the US only for a very brief period before going back home. The only thing that would make me "privileged" is that I'm straight, which is not something that I discuss online.

Still, in fandom spaces I get the worst possible shit from people who have now made "End OTW Racism" their entire identity.

I write fics about a mixed ship and one of the character is of the same race and background as me. According to these cunts, who I doubt even knew that my country existed before this fandom was born, I'm racist, don't know how to write characters of my own ethnicity, and I'm divulging dangerous stereotypes (most of them, I swear, they made up after entering the fandom. Some of the shit they say is a "well known stereotype for X people" is stuff I've never heard before in my life. They're so stupid and racist that they're making up their own stereotypes about my people so that they can harass others about it).

Even after I wrote long posts saying that I'm of the same background as the character, "proving" myself as knowing more than them, I still get attacked by these Americans who think that their ancestors coming from a non-white country a century and a half ago makes them somewhat special.

They accuse me of living with internalized racism and send me links to Stitch's articles to, and I quote, "decolonize myself." Because Stitch, an American cunt who knows shit about nothing and I'd be surprised to learn speaks a second language or has travelled outside her own backyard, clearly can teach me how I should consider myself and my own compatriots.

Americans treat Stitch like the savior of the people, but as far I've seen (in first person, in other fandom spaces, here too), very few people have found comfort in her articles. They are constantly used against them, if they weren't being made fun of by Stitch herself, which only contributes to even more harassment.

I'm really tired of them, of Stitch, of this new character that is Dr Pande and that we're supposed to treat like a prophet, of their useless movements, of how everything has to fit American standards otherwise you're evil and deserve to be executed, of everything.

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qqueenofhades · 7 months

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Is it selfish and entitled to be optimistic? I know a lot of shit is happening but a lot of good stuff is happening to and I just feel like their are people who are not right wing who just want the rest of us to give up.

Er..... no????

Sorry, this is just the exact kind of question that, when I see it, makes me wonder what sort of insane terminally online brainworms are invading the Discourse (tm) now and both be surprised and not at all surprised that you feel the need to ask. So much of online culture is about nihilism, especially in social media: everything's terrible, everyone's doomed, if you don't recognize that it's Doomed then you're either delusional or "lol neurotypical," and any attempts to change that narrative, push back on it, point out the good things, or insist that meaningful action is both necessary and able to make a difference are somehow Morally Wrong. It's tied into the entire idea that doing nothing is the best course of (non) action, we're all doomed anyway, and that it's better to accept that and aggressively insist that others agree, because conveniently, if everything's terrible and past hope anyway, there's no obligation to try to fix it. It's the real-world corollary of the grimdark fiction insistence that only evil, depression, death, and cruelty are "real," and everything else is naive, stupid, simplistic, saccharine, or otherwise unrepresentative of the "reality" of the Big Mean World. And just like... come on. That's not true. We all know it's not true. Shut up.

It's the same kind of culture that glamorizes depression and poor mental health, insists that any basic steps to help yourself are "ableist," or otherwise does its best to cling to its negative and disempowered mindset, rather than taking any responsibility for either an individual or collective situation and attempting, however small, to make a difference. I'm not surprised that therapy-speak has been yet again weaponized to insist that anyone who has any amount of hope or positive outlook is "selfish and entitled," but as your Local Wise Tumblr Elder, I can safely assure you that it's bullshit and you're under absolutely no obligation to believe it, listen to it, or incorporate it into your worldview or actions. Giving up and throwing up your hands is easy. The hard part is actually trying to change things, accepting that we live in a flawed world, and that it nonetheless does not need to be unmitigated misery at all times. It will not be everything, but it will be something, and it will matter. It will also make you feel better, and very probably, other people as well.

Anyway: you're right. There ARE good things happening. They don't get nearly as much press or play as the bad things, but they still exist, and they should be pointed out. If you're participating in discussions or groups that are pushing the idea that only the bad things are valid, and you're "selfish" for insisting otherwise, I suggest that you drop them or otherwise cut way back or set healthy boundaries. Because, it's just not true, it deliberately disheartens and demoralizes you from trying, and the only people who benefit from that are the fuckwits who are largely responsible for ruining shit in the first place. So don't let them get away with it even more and automatically apply this mindset to yourself before you even try. Etc. etc. you are not obliged to complete the work, but nor are you free to abandon it. So yeah.

#anonymous #ask

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crazylittlejester · 14 days

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THEYRE (the chain) ALL AUTISTIC ESPECIALLY THE ERAS WAR TRIO!! IN THIS TEDTALK I WILL-

mask was, ironically, very low masking

warriors was (and still kinda is) VERY high masking

(Tune is somewhere in the middle + ADHD)

mask really struggled at first on the battlefield because of his extreme lack of social skills (dude was raised in the woods with a bunch of other autistic fairy kids), lack of danger awareness, and poor understanding of war/battlefield (he’s used to 1-1 boss fights not war), and the fact that as a kid, he was already much much higher support needs, not even mentioning how traumatized he must’ve been.

warriors was drowning in stress, a literally TEENAGER (I hc him being 16-20 during the war) severely masking and like, PHYSICALLY UNABLE TO STOP. Among all the other non-neurodivergent stressors (cia, A WAR, parenting two kids in battle, food issues)

warriors helped mask learn tips for surviving the neurotypical world** (TM) and made sure he was 100% accommodated, since warriors knew he, himself would never have that.

Mask subtly (and probably accidentally) pushed warriors to mask less, creating a safe space where the three bros could all be them selves. He’d throw the biggoron sword if someone so much as looked NEAR where warriors was when he was stimming, ready to fight the h8ters if necessary.

later on, the trio (and now 6 more!) rejoin, and time is pleasantly surprised to see that warriors has kept some of the mentality. Granted, he’s not made any progress since then, but he’s not gotten worse, so that’s something.

Warriors is also quietly content that time has retained the social skills he taught him, in fact, he’s picked up even more! Though he finds it hard to find time at all scary, intimidating, or powerful, because warriors knows EXACTLY what is going through time’s head when he makes that face, I mean, he taught his brother himself!

warriors now has to face the living proof that he’s not weird or broken, lest he tell that to his eight brothers who are nowhere near as masking as he is, culture shock!

**DISCLAIMER!!

I know that the idea of “normalizing” autistic kids via teaching them neurotypical behaviors is a very complex and nuanced conversation to be had, and I’m not trying to parade around supporting ABA. (not to make this about me or anything,) but this pov/head cannon/prompt (?) is inspired from the perspective of me and my lower masking/much higher support needs sibling (both are autistic) :)

Your favorite,

-MANDARIN WARRIORS

I love you for this oh my god

To me, one of the things Mask struggles with the most besides social cues is controlling his facial expressions when especially when talking to others, which is why the other Links just automatically assumed he was the stoic silent type, because they saw this serious looking older guy who rarely smiles and were like “oh he means business-” but really he just has very flat expressions. Similarly I think he’s very dry when he speaks, it was worse when he was younger, and he’d gotten better at making himself sound more excited/happy, but occasionally the others (not including Wars) think he’s being sarcastic when he isn’t. And this is part of why they can never tell if he’s joking about having fought the moon.

With how chaotic his childhood was (and also because of the autism), to me he’s someone who really needs stability and predictably, which is why ranch work is sooo good for him. Like yeah unexpected things happen, but he can also sit there and take care of the animals and know he will be taking care of the animals the next day (also I think braiding Epona’s mane would be both comforting for him AND the horse)

Warriors is someone I can see stressing out so much about how people view him and he’s so scared of being anything less than perfect that he ends up getting trapped masking and everything just builds up until he explodes. He certainly was not coping well during the war, with everything that was going on, but I totally agree that Mask helped him mask less. Those two absolutely helped each other, both intentionally and completely by accident. By the time he’s in his mid/late twenties, he’s gotten a lot better about not letting everything build up, and also at unmasking every once in a while when he feels safe. (you’re so right, time/mask would fight ANY haters on wars’s behalf)

Everything you said was so perfect and I love it!! I’ve written one fic centering around these two being autistic (although I didn’t explicitly state that because I don’t know if they’d have like, the medical diagnosis for that in hyrule), and i really need to write more. I myself am autistic and good autism rep is really important to me because I never saw it as a kid

You’re literally my favorite at this point, mandarin wars anon, I hope you’re having a good day 🫶

#linked universe #linkeduniverse #lu warriors #lu wars #lu time #jes talks #jes ask

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blow-me-a-kis · 1 year

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Piracy in ofmd is actually already a culture departed from cis het neurotypical society and Izzy is actually a representation of that. I think if ppl would stop treating Stede like he's injecting neurodiversity and queerness into piracy, and instead as the beneficiary of that society, they could see it, too.

I just feel like ppl who don't perceive Izzy as autistic don't really have close friendships with a lot of autistic or neurodiverse ppl IRL. That or they are still doing a lot of masking in relationships and expecting others to masks. But some of us can't.

Most ppl who interact with me IRL probably think I'm mean or rude or even stupid. I'm partially non verbal, I can't smile at strangers/on command, I can't laugh at jokes I don't find funny, I get snippy and irritable if I'm overstimulated. If you ask me how I'm doing, know that me asking you back is like pushing a boulder up a hill for me.

When I do speak it may come out slowly or come off as crytic/weird/inappropriate, and also I may say it too loud or too quiet or too late or with an inappropriate inflection or with a facial expression that doesn't match. My most embarrassing trait is that I get shouty when I'm having a meltdown and I cant help it.

On top of all that I'm Black, so ppl read me as aggressive/negative no matter how I present

I also have autistic and neurodiverse friends who are very similar to me. I have friends who are downright grating in personality, real Izzy's, who I take comfort in because I know its okay if they find me grating. They don't care if I take a long time to respond or don't respond at all when asked a question, they don't mind if I get snippy or they'll tell me directly if I hurt their feelings instead of holding it against me.

I am actually at a point in my life where I am reevaluating friendships where masking has been a requirement, where I feel the need to perform to be liked. I just want to be allowed to be boring or in a bad mood or tired or slow and inflexible, or a Bitch, because I am, and being Pleasant is just not accessible to me. I'll be 33 this year, and I'm exhausted of trying to be anything but myself.

Even the ways a lot of folks like Stede leave out his less palatable autistic traits. Like the fact that almost everyone who meets him in canon does not like him and he has to grow on most ppl. He's hard headed, annoying, presumptuous, obnoxious. This is apart of his autism as well, and why piracy suits him, FREES him.

Izzy is right at home as a pirate because of these very things also. He doesn't have to mask as a neurodiverse person or as a queer man.

I think it's safe to say a lot of ppl's classist views on piracy are reflected in their negative/unfair views of Izzy. The idea that pirates should be softer or nicer or more pleasant or even that a failure to take on these values is Toxic Masculinity (taking this phrase from fandom and putting it on a high shelf until you learn that upperclass white cis het neurotypical masculinity is not the norm and white women learn to question their motivation in normalizing the idea of systemic harm they can't participate in) neglects what Oluwande spoke about in episode one, that piracy is a culture built by people who did not have a choice to do anything but survive.

I hope in s2 we will see Stede get a taste of what that struggle is really like and abandon his classist, romantic notions of piracy.

#Ive said it before #so much discourse hinges on the failure to interpret piracy as an inherently queer culture #which also hinges on the misinterpretation of what queerness even Is #izzy hands #actually autistic #classism

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metalgrateeater · 19 days

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Okay so this has been on my mind forever and now that I actually have somewhat of a platform I’m just gonna come out and say it

BEING NON VERBAL IS NOT AT ALL THE SAME THING AS BEING SELECTIVELY MUTE

You physically cannot just “go non verbal” that’s not how that works in the slightest. To be non verbal is to physically be unable to speak or only being able to slightly speak past the age of 4, it’s not caused by trauma and it isn’t triggered by anything it’s usually caused by development disabilities so it peeves me so so bad when I see people saying that they’re “going to go non verbal” ESPECIALLY as someone who’s own close relative has this disability, it actively affects his daily life and makes things for him so so much harder, I’ve seen him been given so many dirty looks for him not conforming to how “normal people” should act in public and it’s so deeply upsetting. And don’t even get me started on neurotypical people using the term because if I open that can of worms the rest of this will be a long winded rant about how much neurotypical people who don’t care to learn the words they say on their little TikTok pages even mean and I don’t think anyone wants to read that.

I honestly don’t hold it against people for not knowing this because it’s not like public schools educate children on that (even though they really really honestly should) but the moral of this story is that the word you are looking for when you don’t feel comfortable talking or feel unable to talk is selective mutism NOT non verbalism

TL;DR selectively mute ≠ non verbal so please look up the definition of what you’re saying before you go around saying you’re turning non verbal

Any reblogs help to spread the message!!!

I’m keeping this post pinned on my profile for autism acceptance month but you can find my original pinned post here

#autism #adhd #mental health #mental disability #actually autistic #actually adhd #non verbal #selective mutism #important #autism acceptance #autism acceptence month

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amysubmits · 11 months

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Random ADHD post on my D/s blog? Why not, I guess. 🤷‍♀️

My therapist shared this ADHD analogy with me.

When neurotypical/non-ADHD brains try to retrieve information, it works like a Google search. They simply think about what they want, and in most cases, the first thing they retrieve is often the correct answer, but even if it’s not, it’s at least relevant to the core topic. It might just give them the answer to what they asked though, so if they need more information about the topic they’ll have to do additional searches.

When ADHD brains try to retrieve information, rather than having a computer they’re in a library with just books. They think about what they want and they head for the right genre or topic, but if they see a super interesting book while walking through the aisles, they might get pulled in to another book before they get to the right topic.

Once they get to the right section of the library, they might have to open a couple of books before they find the book that has this exact answer, and they’ll definitely have to pass by some pages that contain only tangentially related information. If that information is really interesting to them, they might read a few paragraphs or a few pages before they move on to finding the answer to the original question. So they might give you somewhat related but not-entirely-on-topic information before they can give you the answer. Once they find the answer to the first question, they may not need to do a second search as they’ll have passed by the additional information they needed while on their way to the answer to the first question.

People without ADHD may assume that people with ADHD are less intelligent because it may take them longer to retrieve the answer, but it’s not usually about them having less information in their brain. It’s about the retrieval process. And it’s why we share a lot of detail when we tell stories, why we go on side-tangents. It’s why I can’t give short answers to anything when talking, and why it’s hard for me to do even in writing. If I’m going to give a brief answer in writing, I have to write out the long answer first and then go back and cut out the unnecessary stuff. But I can’t detect what is unnecessary when I’m first writing it, it isn’t clear to me. I can only figure out what the unnecessary stuff is after I see it all written out. So when speaking, I can’t just go from point A to point B most of the time. Which is often less efficient in terms of time, but sometimes there’s benefit in being detailed.

#random #adhd #neurodivergence

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avpdvoidspace · 7 days

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Do you ever struggle with being demonized for your quietness? I have, pretty much my whole life. I think it's a huge problem in society, if I'm being honest. I'm tired of acting like my whole child-self was in the wrong for not being able to bring myself to talk in a lot of situations, especially since I didn't get diagnosed and treated for my disorders until I was an adult. To be honest, I think it's society's way of demonizing people with AvPD, non-verbal autism and selective mutism. Thinking people like us are "rude" or "suspicious" for only speaking when spoken to, or having a non-verbal episode where we can't speak at all. I was suspected of being violent or "hiding something". Also I was deemed "weird" and treated like some alien due to other neurodivergencies as well.

People on this website sometimes act like being quiet is also a weakness or result of privilege. My parents were encouraging me and trying to get me to speak all the time, though. No one was saying "you don't have to speak if you don't want to". My father used to get angry with me about it, calling me "weak" and my mother used to guilt-trip me for it, claiming I "never tried hard enough" for her because I couldn't get myself to be neurotypical.

I also grew up in a world of domestic violence. My mother told me the abuse she faced from my father started getting particularly worse when she was pregnant with me. I was a little child born on-edge and having to walk on eggshells. My parents would get into violent fights with each other and my father would hit me, too. Both my parents worked and instead of spending time at home playing or bonding with family like other kids did, I was made to go to headstart when I was only like 2. I know it might seem like not a big deal, but thinking about it, I didn't have the same experiences that average kids do, and I still don't know if whether or not that contributed to my avoidant personality. I didn't even realize most kids don't even start school until they're 4 or 5 until I was much older. People have been getting me out there and encouraging me to socialize with others since the very beginning. It never worked.

I spent my whole life hating myself for it. I felt like I was never competent and that I was a burden on my mother. And there were many times I did try to make connections with others but they ended up either backstabbing me or shaming me for my interests. I regret a lot of the times I allowed myself to be known by others. There are many memories of me simply saying things to people that make me feel awful. Terrible disorder.

I did manage to make and keep some friends. But also I'm still not truly myself with most of them and still afraid they're going to end up demonizing me too if they knew more about me. Being queer and growing up with having kinks has left me with seeing so much family, strangers, and even other queer people say people like me are "freaks" and "degenerates" to my face without knowing they're talking someone who's exactly the kind of person they think should be killed.

I saw a post recently and honestly, it doesn't even apply to me. However, it still managed evoke a lot of negative emotions and memories I am experiencing right now...

So there's this post going around that goes something like "discourse about letting kids not say 'trick or treat' is concerning"(paraphrasing) which was weird to me at first because I've never seen anyone say they allow their kids not to say it. I've always said "trick or trick" during Halloween as a kid, even adding some "meows" because I liked being a cat. So it doesn't even apply to me.

But then there were people acting like not saying it comes from a place of privilege. Someone was like (paraphrasing again)"when I was giving out candy, all the black children were lively and sweet, and all the kids who didn't say it were white and probably middle class".

And that struck me a bit. I'm mixed race. People treated me like a potential violent threat because of my quiet nature, which was a result from trauma, not anyone "babying" me. I was always working class. My parents didn't even own a car. We used public transportation to get everywhere.

BIPOC kids who are quiet get treated as threats! Of course you fucking enjoy lively black kids. If one of them was quiet, you might demonize them...

Then there were people saying "you people just need to grow up."

It's so strange that traits that apply to non-verbal autism or CPTSD get deemed as "social anxiety", because tumblr thinks that is the lesser disorder.

I don't know. I got a lot of bad memories spring up from seeing that post, and I just wanted to vent about it here. So many people demonized me for being quiet growing up and it made me believe I was a monster for so long.

I'm not even saying I encourage the behavior of refusing to talk to people. I had a nice conversation with an old woman at Dunkin yesterday. I enjoy small talk and listening to others talk, even when I can't add much to the conversation. I just worry about other children who are like how I was growing up, being traumatized and quiet and being treated like shit for it... I don't trust anyone sees "quiet" as "rude"

I'm sorry about the length and I hope you're doing well.

anon, I'm sorry this took me so long to post. I just want to say that your ask really resonated with me and I've thought about it several times since receiving it. I get similarly frustrated when I see priveleged people praising marginalized for being more friendly, more whatever, for similar reasons. Or setting up an oppression competition between two groups they're not even a part of.

#avpd #avoidant personality disorder #again #sorry to take so long to post these #have been especially avoidant

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