#stephen is gonna have his hands so full y'all

[marksbear]

Markkkkkk buddy heyyy could I request a Stephen Strange x Vampire!reader where the reader comes home from maybe a walk or a grocery trip and he’s just super sad and moody and so he just walks past Stephen and goes straight to their shared room and a little while later Stephen comes in with some tea to ask what’s wrong and the reader explains that he’s sad cause he realized that he’ll outlive Stephen and after a bit more back and forth Stephen suggests that the reader turns him so that they’ll be together forever and so he does 😋☝️

Great it's one of my least favorite mutuals. JK JK I'm only joking I love you and I hope you enjoy this @prismuffin!

STEPHEN STRANGE X VAMPIRE MALE READER

"Excuse me young man..."

A weak voice says to Y/n catching his attention. Y/n turns to the voice and a small smile slowly grows on Y/n's face.

It's an elderly couple looking at Y/n. "Yes?" Y/n says looking at the men. "Could we have that? You have the last one and my husband loves that brand. But he was a bit shy to ask."

Y/n eyes the item in his hand before handing it to the couple. "Of course y'all can have it." Y/n answers with a smile. "Oh thank you may god bless you son."

The elderly man takes it and hands it to his husband giving Y/n one more smile before heading off with his husband.

Y/n stands in the aisle in a train of thought. "Growing old together." Y/n says his words are slipping out while he thinks of Stephen. Y/n shakes his head before going back shopping.

After the vampire is done shopping he begins his walk home with way too much on his mind. Soon enough he begins to feel overwhelmed just by the thought of him staying young and Stephen being old and slowly dying.

Like the universe is playing games on the vampire he sees couples of all ages passing by him. Y/n stops when he hears someone say "I could never live without you."

Y/n covers his ears with a sigh picking up his pace walking home.

ONCE the vampire finally arrives home he feels like hes gonna collapse. Y/n puts the bags on the table fast before making his way to the bedroom ignoring his long-term boyfriend in the process.

The doctor watches his boyfriend go past him not even sparing him a glance. Stephen doesn't waste any time going to the kitchen and fixes tea for him and his boyfriend. Stephen goes to the fridge and gets a blood bag. When the tea is done Stephen pours some of the blood into Y/n's cup.

Stephen takes the bag back to where it belongs and picks up the tray of tea walking to the bedroom. The cloak opens the door for Stephen and flies back to Y/n's lap.

"Made you tea. Just the way you like it." Stephen says putting the tray on the edge of the bed getting in the bed next to Y/n. "What's wrong dear?" Stephen asks with full concern in his voice.

"I'm going to outlive you..."

Stephen stares at Y/n thinking before putting his hand on Y/n's head playing with his hair calming down Y/n a little. "Stephen we can't do any of the things that you mortals love. Like growing old together! or uhm- fuck... Like uhm going to see a sunset together and other human things." Y/n cracks with some tears falling out of his eyes.

"Y/n. You don't need to worry about doing those regular things. What me and you have right now is more perfect than seeing some dumb sunset."

"And technically we can grow old together just that your face and body won't show it unlike mine."

"What about death? You and me can't always be with one another. Eventually you're gonna die and i'm immortal. And I don't know if I can your death." Y/n asks quietly and is a bit shy to talk about this.

"You're scared of losing me?" The doctor asks getting a nod yes from his boyfriend. "So. Just turn me into a vampire." Stephen suggests like it was obvious. Y/n ponders for a bit looking at Stephen.

"We will be together forever. Better than marriage in my opinion if you ask me." "We can't even get married the government and almost everyone else thinks I'm dead." Y/n thinks a bit more before sitting up and stares at Stephen.

"Do you trust me?"

"Wouldn't be here if I didn't."

"You're such an ass Stephen." Y/n says back with a laugh not expecting anything else from his smart ass of a boyfriend.

Y/n kisses trails on Stephen's jaw going lower and kissing random spots on his boyfriends neck until he finds the vein. Y/n kisses the part and gives it a few licks.

"Y/n your turning me into a vampire not a---"

Stephen is cut off when Y/n's fangs dig deep inside his flesh. Stephen feels like pushing Y/n away, but like the cloak read his mind it wraps itself around Stephen holding him still. The doctor bites his lips trying to contain the noises of pain hes feeling.

Soon enough Stephen feels lifeless his body giving out laying its full weight on Y/n. Y/n pulls away looking at Stephens body before biting his own wrist ripping some skin off for blood to come out. The vampire moves his wrist Stephen's mouth.

Stephen immediately uses the strength he has left holding Y/n's arm still as he drinks the blood. Soon enough Stephen gets the strength back in his body and only some of his color back.

Y/n moves his arm away much to Stephens displeasure. "I know you're hungry. Lets go to the kitchen and give you a blood bag." Y/n has to carry Stephen to the kitchen putting him on the counter before he opens the fridge getting a blood bag to Stephen.

"I just remembered you're a doctor. More specifically a surgeon." Y/n says watching his boyfriend eat. "Maybe I should call you a baby bat." Y/n teases laughing when he imagines Stephen's first day back at the job now as a vampire.

"Can't wait to spend the rest every single day with you."

THE END

#stephen strange #doctor strange x male reader #doctor strange #x male reader #male reader #Stephen strange x male reader #doctor stephen strange #the bear club #marvel x male reader

[worstloki]

Scott: What’s going on here?

Cassie, Loki, Kamala, Kang, Billy, Tommy, Peter, Kate, Shuri, Riri,: young avenger rebellion.

Scott: Oh, heck yeah! stick it to the old people!

Stephen Strange, the Old Person™ in question, very tired: No! Do NOT!! Do NOT stick it to the old people!!! Go back!!!! Ctrl alt delete RIGHT NOW!!!!!

#stephen is gonna have his hands so full y'all #if kid loki shows up and so does endgame loki he's going to have TWO loki's to deal with and that guy is two handfuls on his own #and that's without whatever mess ends up happening with poor billy and tommy #peter's identity was released!! udebwsjhsuygbfsd stephen might have to go remove that secret identity memory from everyone along the way #Kamala is showing up in a show and THAT's going to go well I'm sure - speaking of which KANG is showing up in Ant-Man 3 sooooo Cassie? UwU #lmao i forgot the hawkeye show was going to be happening for a moment there but!! KATE!!!!! #Shuri gonna take over as Black Panther? Shuri gonna work part-time super-hero-ing? UwU #Riri was going to show up as Ironheart along the way right? #Surely Stephen is going to be needed there too #I can't wait for Stephen to be the adult supervision equivalent here #and then Loki just throws a pie at his face allowing all the kids to skeet #not the kid loki. the adult loki threw the pie. and then smiles innocently about it. #okay new AU guys where Tony adopts all the kids and Stephen keeps getting called in to 'handle things' or 'help handle things' #and every time he shows up he just knows he should've been called in DAYS ago because everything is SUCH a MESS #OH! #also with Wandavision and the Loki show hints at Mephisto I'm hoping the whole ''kids are so hard to control'' thing leads to Young Avengers #OH WAIT hulkling might still show up if Captain Marvel is going to be messing with Skrulls again!! #we got ourselves a full team #👀👀👀 #wandavision #wandavision show #wandavision spoilers

[elijahs-wife]

🌙 hi y'all! april is pretty much over—i'm a bit late this month but here is a list of all the incredible fics i read over the last month. i can vouch for each one of them, they are all incredible!

🌙 reminder: some of these stories are 18+, so if you are a minor, please don't interact with them! respecting boundaries is important. please also remember to show your support to your favorite fic writers and REBLOG their work! likes are great but reblogs are what keep us going and motivate us to write more stories! one click of a button truly means the world to us.

🌙 catch up with last month's reading list!

☁ the vampire diaries/the originals

↠ breakfast in bed by @theeoriginals

[lucien castle x reader, one shot, fluff] this was the first fic i've ever read for lucien and it actually made me not hate his guts lmao, so cute but still keeping with the essence of his character!! 💖

↠ tranquil by @seraphictrash

[elijah mikaelson x reader, one shot, angst] literally made me cry, was not expecting this fic to be what it was, it's horribly sad but beautiful and just written so, so well.

↠ take me by the heart, take me by the hand by @iliveiloveiwrite

[elijah mikaelson x reader, one shot, fluff] ahh i really loved this one!! i love a good soulmate au and millie delivered hard 😌 she never misses y'all

↠ emptiness of the heart by @imgoingtofreakoutnow

[elijah mikaelson x reader, one shot, angst] made me want to unalive myself. so sad. please just read, i cannot talk about this fic again.

↠ a life without you by @xxwritemeastoryxx

[eventual elijah mikaelson x reader, series] i am so incredibly excited for this series especially bc i've never seen this specific au done before for elijah? and ahhh dom's series always slap hard so i just know it's going to be awesome (while you're at it pls check out her extensive masterlist she is so talented!!)

↠ starved by @nikmikaelsonswife

[klaus mikaelson x reader, one shot, smut] sweet lord this was so, so sexy 🥵 klaus in rut— GIVE IT TO ME!!!!

↠ turn me or leave me by @malfoys-demigod

[elijah mikaelson x reader, one shot, angst] this one was :( made me so upset lmao, hit me right in the heart :(

↠ stefan helps you with a panic attack by @auroracalisto

[stefan salvatore, drabble] i had to include this on here bc reading it was such a comfort to me and i just wanted to share that with anyone who might need it 💕

↠ like i'm gonna lose you by @hellotvshowtrash

[elijah mikaelson x reader, one shot, angst] literally obliterated my heart pls 😭 so beautifully written and tragic.

↠ favorite city, favorite day by @malfoys-demigod

[elijah mikaelson x reader, one shot, fluff] absolutely adorable,

↠ gestures by @tweedlydumbtweedlydoo

[elijah mikaelson x reader, one shot, fluff] elijah is such a cutie in this one—pls read if you enjoy the 'two idiots in love' trope 😌

↠ kick ass by @biisexualemma

[kol mikaelson x reader, one shot, fluff (?)] SO CUTE I YELLED!!! kol is such a sweetheart (when he's not being a pain) and this fic just made me fall in love with him a little bit??

☁ marvel cinematic universe

↠ persephone's symphony by @dizzydancingdreamer

[bucky barnes x reader, series] whenever a new chapter comes out it is the highlight of my day. i love this series more than i can express, it is actually so good and masterfully written and i will keep shouting about this until y'all give it the attention it deserves. READ.

↠ it's messy inside, let me take your coat by @divine-mistake

[bucky barnes x reader, one shot, smut] this one took me on a flipping roller coaster of emotions, but the ending had me melting 🥺

↠ between metal and flesh by @thatweirdoleigh

[bucky barnes x reader, one shot, whump (?)] this hurts my heart but in the best way 🥺 very painful but also soft and sweet 💞

↠ the four times bucky tries to tell you he loves you and the one time he does by @hellotvshowtrash

[bucky barnes x reader, one shot, fluff] so fucking cute oh my god makes me yearn so hard for a shy nervous bucky 😭 one of your best works!! 💗

↠ career day by @alittlebitofwords

[bucky barnes x reader, one shot, fluff] one of the sweetest things i've ever read 😭 in this house we adore dad!bucky and ahhh this was just so adorable!!! 💓

↠ security deposit by @sventeen-daybreak

[bucky barnes x reader, one shot, smut] neighbour!bucky owns my ass, this was so good, loved their relationship and how organic it all was!! incredible 💗

↠ baby blues & tattoos by @angeli-marco-writes

[stephen strange x reader, one shot, smut] i have now re-read this fic 3 times and i am still not over it—your writing style is so good and your characterization of stephen is so spot on 💞

↠ spellbound by @boop-le-snoot

[stephen strange x reader, one shot, smut] have also read this around 3 times now and am still not over it (how starved of content are us stephen fans lmao) — immaculate smut and build up to the smut as well!! 💓

↠ my darling, what did you expect? by @tripleyeeet

[helmut zemo x reader, one shot, angst] makes me wanna unalive myself SFKHSH jk but no this just makes me want to punch zemo and also dom him (maybe both at the same time?)

↠ sam wilson nsfw alphabet by @divine-mistake

[sam wilson x reader, headcanon, smut] yes divine is on this list again. this is like the best sam smut i've read and it wasnt even like. in the form of a full fic. the power you hold, deadly.

↠ 'till death blooms us art by @divine-mistake

[sam wilson x reader, one shot, angst with a happy ending] yes it's this woman again shfshk i can't help that she's so talented. this is an actual masterpiece. so beautiful in its imagery and comparisons, an absolute must read!! 💗

☁ miscellaneous

↠ do what you please to me, i won't resist by @cloudystevie

[andy barber x reader, one shot, smut] literally my entire fantasy in one fic—this is so filthy but so GOOD yknow. jasmeen never misses with the daddy andy content 😌

↠ little red riding hood by @latenitewolves

[peter hale x reader, one shot, smut] one of the first fics i ever read on the hellsite—read it again and was just as amazed, it's still hot as fuck 🥴

↠ passenger seat by @thatslikely

[stiles stilinski x reader, one shot, fluff] so cute its actually insane, fast food and jeep dates with stiles is such a dream 🥺

and that's it for this month! thank you to everyone here for sharing your stories with us! the world is so much better with wonderful fanfiction authors like yourselves in it. always immensely grateful to all of you xx tay 💞

#elijahs-wife reading list #april reading list #again a huge thank you and i love you to all the writers here!! #and to the readers remember to reblog the fics you like!! #also it is very very clear which characters i am biased towards lmaoooo #pls let me know if any links are broken!!!

[boop-le-snoot]

PARTY FAVOURS I CHAPTER 8

Releasing two chapters today in honour of my birthday! I am officially 23 years old. Oh my God, what the fuck? I feel ancient.

Rating: Explicit.

‼️TW: Reader is EIGHTEEN! Recreational drug use, smoking and alcohol consumption, deeply internalised self-loathing, very questionable moral standards. Daddy kink taken half-seriously. BDSM themes in later chapters - explicit content will come with it's own TWs. FIRST PERSON POV.

Summary: You're Peter's classmate, a child of rich and famous but uncaring parents. Getting paired up for a lengthy project with the boy was an interesting turn of events and you don't know whether to feel blessed or cursed when you develop, seemingly, a perfectly normal, harmless crush on Tony Stark. Fueled by feelings of inadequacy and boredom, your life spirals out of control - and you're lucky your newfound friends are there to pick up the pieces even if you cannot find it in yourself to believe these amazing human (and not so human) beings voluntarily give you more than a fleeting glance and an offhanded thought. And they brought cake!

A/N: I started writing this for porn and now? Look at all this plot. Disgusting! Featuring: the Hulk, more Bruce fluff, and DISASTER PARENTS. It's gonna get worse before it gets better y'all.

My beta, @miscmarvelwritings is the Peter to my Tony. Love you 3000, baby.

The beeping startled me awake, the haze of my recent memory made me very unsettled. Last thing I remembered was laying down on the couch and Peter's admission - the little! Guy! Was! Spider-Man! Holy! Shit!

Beeping intensified and I heard grumbling and shuffling coming from the side of me. A warm sensation engulfed my right hand and I smiled. I'd recognize that hand anywhere. Bruce was in the room with me so I was definitely in a safe place.

Me eyelids parted meeting a set of oddly fluorescent green eyes. Holy fuck, that was no Bruce, it was... But how? His form was slouched in an uncomfortable position over the bed, crease marks on his face. It was Bruce's body, Bruce's face but who held control over it - he was no Bruce Banner.

"No worry, Princess is safe," The voice that left his mouth was much more primal, with an unmistakable growl underneath. He watched me, alert, scanning my face with unblinking eyes. "Bruce asleep now. I keep watch."

I swallowed the unease. "Hi, Hulk, and thank you," Squeezing his hand very, very gently. "Nice to meet you, by the way."

He grinned, all teeth and sharp canines. He looked like a wolf. The look was so out of place on usually gentle Bruce's face that I had to study it, had to memorize that stark difference between Banner and his alter ego. The smile faltered slightly as he closed his eyes. "Bruce waking up now. See you soon." And with that, his head fell onto his arm, dead weight and limp.

His hair was tousled, a curly mess, and he wore the same shirt I remembered him in. Upon closer inspection it still bore minor stains of what I assumed was my blood. It was probably the only time I would get to look at him, really look at Bruce without the fear of being caught, being weird or getting misinterpreted. He was really handsome, the five o'clock shadow silver on his usually neatly shaved chin, his jawline was firm and... He really was beautiful.

His eyes slowly blinked open, the usual colour brown. Noticing me awake, Bruce immediately perked up. "Morning. How do you feel?" He asked, voice croaky and sleep-drunk.

It sent shivers down my spine. "I'm good, nothing feels amiss besides the left part of my face. That's kind of puffy," I admitted, failing to describe the full-and-pulling sensation I was currently experiencing. "I met the Hulk. He was nice." I added as an afterthought. Thought he should know.

Bruce frowned. "He does that sometimes. Sorry."

"No, it's okay. I think, I think I'd like to meet him properly one day," I admitted my biggest curiosity. After all, I've already met real aliens.

Bruce seemed speechless for a moment. "Are you sure?" He stuttered. "He's...a bit much," He parroted my previous comment about my house, much to my amusement. "You sure it's not the concussion talking?" Banner squinted at the monitor at my bedside, avoiding my eyes.

"I'm very sure," I squeezed the hand I was still holding in quiet affirmation. "Besides, he promised to see me soon."

"Oh did he," Bruce muttered darkly but I could see his face brighten nonetheless. "Right, so I'm going to call in Strange and we can see about unhooking you from all these things," Bruce gestured to the various wires and monitors.

True to his word, Strange waltzed in no more than ten minutes after Bruce called him. Seeing me, the usually stoic man began snickering, unsuccessfully attempting to hide his amusement by swirling his cape in an unnecessarily dramatic fashion. I was not impressed, Bruce was not impressed and neither was Tony who walked in shortly after all the wires were removed from my persona.

"So... Is someone going to tell me why is Dumbledore so joyful this fine morning?" I crossed my arms under my boobs.

"You don't remember?" Tony snorted at my negative head shake. "Before you passed out, you demanded cake and said Wizard here looks like Benedict Cumberbatch. To be fair, I see the resemblance, but you...." Tony paused to snicker multiple times. "You managed to butcher up the guy's name multiple times, I swear to Thor, what came out of your mouth was..." The engineer laughed, making a broad and vague gesture with his hands. "What did she say? Bubble-butt Orgy-pants?" He asked Bruce who was as unsuccessful at hiding his laughter as Strange himself. Even the wizard's cape was bouncing.

I wheezed, suddenly coming to a realization. It wasn't a concussion induced lucid dream, I had actually said that. "It's really bold of you to assume I can pronounce and remember his name while I'm sober," I said. "I just call him British-guy Funny-name." Tony cackled at that, giving me a hearty thumbs up and ungracefully plopping down at the foot of my hospital bed.

"How do you feel, Buttercup?" He was looking earnestly at me now, his sparkling brown eyes big and round and worried.

I had to distract myself to keep from literally face-planting into his lap then and there. "Good, actually." Tony nodded happily, and I raised my finger. "But for the record, Doctor Strange..." I addressed the man who turned to me expectantly. "Please don't get pissed off, I have a request..." He nodded warily. "Don't shave? I mean, now that I can clearly see the resemblance between him and you... Please don't shave off the beard or you'll look like an angry aardvark."

The men in the room gaped, most of all, Stephen - his face was somewhere between resigned suffering and surprised disbelief.

"Angry... Aardvark..." Tony fuckin' WHEEZED. "Fuck a duck..." The engineer clutched at his stomach in an obnoxious fit of laughter, Bruce was snorting too. "The fuck is an aardvark?" The lone word seemed to have a magical effect on Tony, increasing his laughter with every time he repeated it out loud.

"Duly noted," Stephen nodded with as much seriousness as he could before cracking a reluctant smile. "I see that the healing technology Tony developed has worked well, if judging only by your sense of humour returning. Good," With that, he waved his hands about and the puffy feeling from my face disappeared. "I took some liberties and added a healing spell with Loki's help." Seeing my raised eyebrow, he elaborated. "Loki was deeply touched by your kind gesture towards his teammate and offered his help. You should be good to resume your daily activities by nightfall although I recommend you take it easy. And call your mother, she stopped by and instructed me to request you communicate at the first comfortable opportunity."

The mild pity and disdain on Strange's face told me that he was the one who had actually spoken with her. She must've been especially icy and bitter considering I had interrupted her daily routine with getting punched in the face. How inconvenient.

With that, Stephen left me with a parting pat on the shoulder, taking Tony with him - the engineer managed to squeeze a whole hug out of me before being bodily (magically?) dragged behind Strange. I was really uncomfortable with all the attention I was receiving wearing only a thin hospital gown and I told Bruce exactly that - promptly, Natasha arrived with a bag I recognised as my own, an ostrich Birkin that held a cute, soft cashmere loungewear set, some basic toiletries along with a set of underwear and a pair of slippers.

Evidently, my mother packed this bag. Never in a thousand years I would wear a $1200 worth of leisure clothing at a hospital. Even Natasha whistled when I first examined the bag's contents.

"Yeah, yeah, my mother's a bit much," I said, immediately cringing at how obnoxious that sounded.

"No shit," Natasha rolled her eyes. Something told me she'd met her too.

"Wait 'til you see my dad," I replied in an identical tone, disappearing behind the door to the bathroom. It was all very luxurious, extra and overall very Stark. Friday's voice coming from the ceiling made it known that I was still in the tower, the AI informed me of the date, time, weather and the further instructions to follow Natasha after I was done freshening up.

Showers had never felt so good.

I was greeted by muted cheers and a hefty brunch on the common floor. Lots of hugs, too, even Loki paused his brooding to give me an awkward, albeit very genuine embrace. I whispered a thanks for the spell which made the moody god considerably less moody - in fact, he smiled like a child on Christmas Eve. Suddenly, I felt much less out of place with my disaster self.

The pleasant part was done and I geared up to call my own personal curse.

"Hello, mother, it's kind of you to pick up," I started the usual. I could literally feel the confusion and concern of the people in the room piercing my back. "Sorry for interrupting your meeting. Yes, I am quite well now. No, Josh can keep running your errands, I will stay at Mr. Stark's for the time being. Tomorrow morning, probably, don't wait up. I will, absolutely. Oh, is he? Wow, that's amazing. I'm so happy," I chirped. My face was one of the suffering kind. "Yes, dinner on Friday night. Okay-I mean, yes, I will ask. He's actually right next to me." I paused to turn around and look at Tony, mouthing 'she wants me to invite you for dinner'.

Tony's speed was breaking the laws of physics as he snatched the phone right out of my hand. "Hello, this is Tony Stark speaking. You know, maybe you should come over to Stark tower. Yes, the whole family. Thanks, bye." He promptly pressed the end call button right as mother had started her goodbye-have a nice day-live long and prosper speech. "How the fuck do you put up with that woman?" He started at me with a mix of concerned incredulousity.

"She's an acquired taste," I groaned. "You just wait. My dad. I..." I literally had no words to describe the upcoming disaster. Tony had no idea what he just had condemned all of the tower's inhabitants to. "Why am I like this? Why are they like this?" I raised my head up to the ceiling as if the AI living in it could give me all the solutions to my life's problems.

"Get some rest, Princess," Bruce was kind enough to spare me any more misery as his warm, broad hand steered me towards the elevator by the small of my back.

As he dutifully fluffed my pillows and handed me a glass of water and my smartphone, I unashamedly basked in the soft attention I was receiving from the older man. I still felt somewhat groggy; best case, I'll fall right asleep and if the dreamland avoids me, I would browse tik tok and Instagram until something else would strike my fancy. The gentle murmur of him describing the latest lab incident I missed out on and the hands combing softly through my hair were the best sleep aides I could have ever asked for.

Bruce is too precious for this world. Too pure.

Friday rolled in with the force of a pissed off rhinoceros. Dad had flown in on a Thursday afternoon, stopping by the house to drop off his suitcase and happily dangle the keys of a brand new Chevrolet Corvette in front of my face before briefly stopping to ruffle my hair, kiss mother on the cheek and drive off into the sunset to "catch up with people at the studio". Jetlag wasn't a word in that man's vocabulary, he probably snorted a line or three as soon as he stepped out of the airport.

I could carry my groceries in the bags under his eyes. He just waved off any of my attempts to get him some rest only showing mild interest when I spoke about my friendship with Tony Stark, absolutely disregarding the rest of the team sans Captain America and the billionaire himself.

I might as well have been in front of a trainwreck, watching it happen second by second. The moment all three of us stepped out of the elevator onto the tidied up common floor, I had the sudden realization of exactly how much we weren't a family.

We were the exact opposite of that.

My mother, tall and slim and perfectly posed in a sleek blue dress with diamonds glittering around her chin, neck and fingers, her obnoxious greed proudly on display. My father, in his early fifties, well-groomed and fit, in his tight designer pants and a plain white t-shirt under a stylish tweed blazer. He looked ridiculous. Only Tony could pull off something like that (I shuddered. Sigmund Freud sends his regards!). And me, little old me, in my $900 jeans, $1500 Gucci sneakers and a mesh crop top I got at Hot Topic. At least, amidst this mess, my eyeliner game was on point.

I smiled sardonically at Steve who came to greet us. He looked as uncomfortable as I felt.

"Captain Rogers," My father greeted him with his Hollywood smile.

"Steve," An equally fake and toothy grin came from the superhero as he gallantly greeted my mother and swept me into an unnecessarily tight hug.

Point one, my father smirked. Somewhere in the corner, Wanda made a gagging noise - quietly, of course, I only knew about it because she did her telepathic mumbo-jumbo to make me aware of her stance on this particular matter.

Point two, my mother loudly announced she was vegetarian while simultaneously praising the catering services that Tony used. Clint had enlisted Bucky and Thor to help him cook and now all three were smiling awkwardly as mother spoke about the "incredibly talented immigrant workers".

Point three, dad made it his JOB to brag about my skills and achievements as if he was the one encouraging me to pursue them. It was fair, I suppose, since he paid for it but alas, it sounded a lot less like he was a proud father and more of a "look at what my puppy can do". I had to tip my proverbial hat to Tony and Bruce there, they both began to describe our lab work in such unnecessary detail, using so many long words, even Loki began quietly chipping in with totally random, long, difficult words. Confusion was beginning to seep through the eternally cheerful facade that my dad wore.

Or maybe it was the coke and Adderall wearing off. Who knew.

"Peter?" Came the dreaded question from my mother. I shook my head in quiet despair as Peter visibly cringed at my mother's voice.

"Yes, ma'am?"

"That vile boy has been taken care of," I could absolutely see Natasha saying the same thing and the only difference laid in the fact that I knew my mother wouldn't actually kill a person. She would hire someone to do it for her. "It's really unfortunate my daughter got in the middle of that sort of situation."

Wow. My mother just called Peter a coward. Wow. Tony briefly went cross-eyed with anger.

"Baby, why you bein' so quiet?" Dad, the mitigator that he was, intervened before a real shit storm could start. Which meant, as usual, putting me on the spotlight. It was me between a rock and a hard place: nothing, and I repeat - nothing I ever did or have done was good enough for both of my parents at the same time.

"I'm fine, dad, just chillin'," I replied, pushing my food around on my plate. He hated it when I ate too much, which was really anything more than two glasses of water and a salad. Being around models on a strict avocado and coke diet really skewed his sense of normal.

"Nah, baby, you're brooding," His teasing tone could've fooled anybody. Just messing around with a teenager. "Come with me tonight, there's a party, Billie Eilish is going to be singing. Not my style but you like that weird goth shit, might cheer you up a lil'," Dad joked and everybody around the table smiled happily at last. Everyone except Tony that was - his press-tour smile was still glued to his face. I hated it. It was unnatural.

"No, dad, you go have your old people fun," I rolled my eyes.

"Jesus Christ," I heard mother mutter on my other side but she kept quiet beyond that.

"C'mon, don't be a spoilsport," Dad insisted.

"Actually, we have a project planned up in the lab..." Tony trailed off, attracting confused looks from his teammates and friends. Pete looked at me in pure envy.

"Alright, alright, dad, I'll go with you, jeez," I mumbled, flushing from the sheer amount of embarrassment flowing through me. Partying with your own father, how sad and pitiful is that?

"I'm very upset at you ditching me," Tony poked a fork in my direction but didn't press the matter further. I avoided the looks of my friend's friends. I avoided the hell out of Bruce who kept making his perfect, round puppy eyes and radiating so much kindness and support I nearly choked on my intermittent sips of water.

"Alright, we will be waiting downstairs with Josh, say your goodbyes," Mother announced as she subtly towed my father towards the elevator. He'd had a whiskey too much and felt particularly chatty much to Tony's displeasure. "Thank you again for your hospitality."

As soon as the doors closed behind my parents, the group of superheroes erupted into a confused debate. I saw Tony blankly staring at the ceiling. Bucky cursing. Thor overly calmly talking with Loki.

Beyond caring about anything, my face flamed as I made a beeline for my dad's latest, untouched glass of whiskey (single malt, neat, double) and downed it in one go. The conversation stopped promptly, people eyeing me with visible concern. Steve was outraged.

"No," I announced, stopping any and all questions, slamming the glass on the table and departing towards the elevator that had made its way back upstairs. "Just no." Were my parting words as the doors closed once again on a startled and disgruntled group of superheroes.

Please check your blog settings before requesting to be added to the taglist. I can't tag some of y'all.

THE TAG LIST IS NOW OPEN! @another-stark-sub ​ @mostly-marvel-musings  @vozit @littlegasps @pilloclock ​ @shereadsinquiet @downeyreads ​ @hermione-grangers-wife ​ @individualistfem ​ @as-i-layhereinyourbed @sleep-i-ness @gigglyfox01

#party favours #bun writes #stephen strange x you #stephen strange x reader #Stephen Strange x y/n #tony stark x y/n #tony stark x reader #tony stark x you #bruce banner x y/n #bruce banner x reader #bruce banner x you #LMFAO BEING A DISASTER RUNS IN THE FAMILY

[professional-benaddict]

i'm so excited for drug raid pt 2!

part one here!! eeee took forever before I got around to part two bUt here it is!! I hope y'all like it xx

Cop Tony, paramedic Stephen, 18+ Little Peter, Littles are known verse, police raids, drug dealing, illegal drug use, referenced forced drug use, referenced kidnapping, past abuse, withdrawal, hospitalisation, whump, angst, comfort, 1.5k

The next day, Tony waltzes into the hospital with a latte in his hand. Still riding the high of the raid from the night before, the cop feels at the top of his game. He and the rest of the department have the upper hand. The evidence and statements keep pouring in, and it’s all in their favour, which means not so much in the drug dealers’ favour. It’s their third successful raid in just two months, and yet this feels different. The stakes feel higher, and Tony feels like he should be here taking the Little’s statement. He was the one who found him after all, abused and forcefully drugged at the hands of the drug dealers, and on top of it all he was manhandled by an overly excited SWAT guy. Perhaps the SWAT guy had an aggression problem. He wouldn’t be the first. 

Tony’s intentions feel more pure than that of the SWAT guys, at least to him, and he likes to think that that was why Fury let him come take the Little’s statement out of all the other officers. To be honest, he likes the kid. He’s intrigued, and not just professionally. Tony doesn’t exactly know what it is, but he’s giddy while waiting in line at the reception to find where his informant is. 

“You can just go wait in the car if you want, honey bear.” Tony teases to Rhodey, who’s with him at the hospital. They are partners after all, and they go everywhere together. Well, maybe not everywhere since Rhodey actually takes him up on the offer, muttering something about his overly sensitive nose and the antiseptic smell of the hospital being a perfect mix for a headache. Tony waves him off and tells him to get out of there before he gets cranky. 

The receptionist is not able to tell Tony exactly where Peter is, but directs him to the neurological wing where they can show him where the Little is. So, Tony heads up and tosses his empty latte cup on his way there. After some more waiting and flashing of his badge, Tony is escorted by a nurse to see Peter. 

“He’s going through withdrawal, and quite badly too. Don’t stress him out, okay? You can always come back another time.” The nurse informs while they walk through some automatic and lockable doors. 

“How long is he gonna be here?” 

“Till the withdrawal wears off, but the doctor is planning on having him on psych hold when the withdrawal is over. The Little’s handle it the worst, you know? He’s having awful nightmares and suicidal thoughts already. Poor babe…” The nurse adds sadly. 

“Yeah…” Tony agrees quietly and steps a bit to the side to let a transporter pushing an empty bed pass them in the hallway. A bit further down the eggshell coloured hallway, the nurse stops and gestures to a door. 

“I’ll just head in first and see how he is.” The nurse smiles and slips through the door, leaving Tony to wait in the hallway alone. 

The cop resists the urge to look through the window in the door. Just what kind of shape is Peter in? Last time Tony saw him he was unconscious after a seizure. It’s almost unheard of that Littles take drugs, precisely because they can hardly handle it. Their vulnerable bodies cave in at the smallest doses, while a caregiver like Tony could take triple the dose and still get up the next morning. And that is why Littles are never legally punished for drug possession, and instead they are put into treatment to get rehabbed. Some might say that is the same as prison, if you think about the principals of each setting. Limited freedom. And yet there’s a major difference. Tony isn’t here to arrest Peter, only talk to him. 

A few moments later, when Tony is about to give in and peak in through the window, the nurse exists again and invites the cop in. The hospital room is quite sad, actually. There’s signs of attempts to make it Little-friendly, but the poorly drawn and creepy cartoon dinosaur has the opposite effect that what was probably intended. The hospital bed is Little proof though, with side rails going all around the bed to keep the patient safe. And Peter does look safe, but also absolutely terrible. 

The big, brown eyes go wide when he lays his eyes on Tony, and the cop stays back a bit. The nurse comes forward then and guides Peter to lay back again when he tries to get up. The boy’s movements are clumsy and shaky. Tony guesses he is experiencing muscle aches and fatigue. 

“No, no- I don’t- I didn’t…” Peter stutters and looks pleadingly at the nurse. The cop tries to ignore the feeling of being assigned ‘the bad guy’ role, even though he has not said a word yet. He wouldn’t be surprised if the drug dealers brainwashed the boy to never trust cops, or anyone else outside their gag for that matter. Just another manipulation tactic to keep him in check. As if forcefully drugging him isn’t enough. 

“Shhh, honey bee. The police office is just going to speak to you. It’s all right.” The nurse coos. 

“I didn’t wan’ to do it. They forced me, please…”

“I know, sweetheart, I know. That’s what the officer is here to talk to you about. Just tell the truth and everything will work out, okay? You can push the button anytime and Amanda or one of the other nurses will come, okay?” 

And with that the nurse takes her leave, but not before whispering to Tony to take it easy. The officer nods and thanks her, then turns to the boy on the bed. 

He looks absolutely terrible, that much is obvious. It looks like Peter is hollow inside, and that his skin is just a facade made of the thinest paper. It the wind where to blow, it might just take Peter along with it. But, Tony knows he is not all hollow inside. The boy’s eyes are pained, and it looks like he is aching to tell his truth, to get everything that is inside out into the world and to someone who can do something. Something to save him. And Tony wants to do precisely that, and so he sits on the chair next to the bed with a soft smile. 

“Hi.” 

“Hi…” 

“I’m Officer Stark, but you can call me Tony.” The officer starts. “You’re Peter. What’s your full name?” 

“Benjamin Parker. Peter Benjamin Parker.” 

“Benjamin, huh? That’s cute.” 

“Is’ after my uncle.”

“Is he around?” 

“Dead.” The Little deadpans, fiddling with the hospital blanket. 

“I’m sorry to hear that.” Tony says sincerely. “Do you have any other family around? Someone we could call?” 

“No- uhm, they all dead. But, Beck took me in.” 

“Quentin Beck? Right.” Tony sighs a bit. Quentin Beck, as in the Beck who is now in custody at the station. They are still putting together the bigger picture and hierarchy of the gang at the station, but it seems like Beck is in the middle there somewhere. And it seems like Peter is very much in the middle of it all too. “Tell me what happened, from the beginning.” 

Peter talks for over half an hour. The boy is so detailed in his descriptions, like he has a photographic memory, that Tony barely has to ask follow up questions, and instead listens as carefully as he can while noting down some key words in his notepad. Sometimes, the boy has to pause to catch his breath or stop himself from crying, but by the end of it the tears finally spill over when Peter starts describing how Beck and the others would drug him against his will. At one point, the boy’s crying is so pained that Tony reaches out to hold his hand. Peter clutches back, like Tony is his anchor in the storm that is his emotional and psychological turmoil. The Little definitely needs to be on psych hold. 

In the middle of Peter’s cry, a nurse knocks on the door and enters with a concerned look. She must have been altered due to Peter’s heart rate picking up due to the crying. 

“Is everything all right here?” The nurse asks, giving Tony a look. The officer feels like she is accusing him of going too hard on the Little. Once again the bad guy. 

“Is- is okay, Amanda…” Peter hiccups and dries his tears bravely. He forces a smile at the nurse when she comes over to check on him. 

“Okay, sweetheart, but I think this is enough for today. You need to rest.” Amanda orders kindly, and once again she gives Tony a look. Getting the implied message, Tony rises from his seat and tucks his notepad, now his very precious notepad, into his jacket. 

“I’ll come back another time, then.” The officer says. 

And Tony does exactly that. 

tag list: @petersmocha @garcia-reid-lovechild @stressedboyinprogess @ikneelbeforemygod @sugar-and-spice-parker @robynofthestars @pastel-parker-bitch @tightaroundthewebshooter @puppypeter @carttorchdeatth @starkerplusstrange @starkermoodboards @smits-stuff @honeybunstarker @xsmallplum @everyonelovespetey @ihonestlydontevenknow @baly0110 @velvetjoker @starkerparkerstark @allaboutthatshowmanlife @itsrachael @holographic-starker @bisexual-spiderling @liesversusjoy @littlespaceofyaoi @spanglesandstars @avengerscollection @bennywantstogotosleep @goldenmogar @justanotherfandomthot

#my prompts #little!peter #daddy!tony #daddy!stephen #starker #starkerstrange #strangespider #ironstrange #tony stark x peter parker #peter parker x stephen strange #tony stark x stephen strange #tony stark #peter parker #stephen strange #ask

[rankdisasster]

old habits die hard

Billy Hargrove x fem reader

“what about a first time having unprotected sex with billy when y'all are married?? I have a hc that he's really safe !!!!!because safe sex is important!!! so when he'd marry his girl the first time without a condom would be a big deal” requested by anonymous.

word count: 2,840

warning(s): nsfw, swearing

a/n: yes I do write smut for anyone wondering, and this is like my first legit wack at a full on filthy one-shot buuuut! I hope this is okay??

—

Heaven. That’s just what you and your marriage together is for Billy. Heaven wasn’t some bearded white dude with a halo on a boring cloud, it was the perfection between his wife’s thighs. It was his wife’s mouth and all the tricks you did to drive him off the rails with it, it was your dirty talk while you teased him relentlessly even when he begged for you to take him all the way. Your body was his fucking sanctuary, plain and simple.

Yours and Billy’s sex life was held mostly in the hands of Billy, given that he’d known all there is to get the best out of it. Let’s just put it this way: he was the Stephen fucking Hawking in the sheets, and he took that gold metal with pride. Billy was no amateur, he wasn’t just an encyclopedia for making sex as hot and exciting as it could be, but he also happened to be safe about it. That’s what truly makes him the best, that he knows all the risks, and does great lengths to avoid accidental pregnancies or other consequences that may occur. He’d still make sure you were having fun, and he’d spend chunks of money from his paycheck nearly every week on condoms for you both, stocking up and hiding them somewhere inconspicuous in every single room. The pull out method just never worked for Billy, mostly because it’s too risky and he doesn’t trust himself when he’s about to blow to do it anywhere else not in you.

So that’s why he nearly choked on the coffee he had gulped at the exact moment that you said you wanted to try taking him raw this time tonight.

Coughing and stuttering like a bafoon, he finally clears his throat and recovers from you nearly killing him, and then stares.

“What? We’ve fucked just about every other way imaginable, why not try it out?” you stick your bottom lip out, pleading as you go up to him closer and closer. So close that he feels the hairs behind his neck stand up and goosebumps forming when your hot breath fans his ear.

Billy closed his eyes and takes a deep breath before setting his coffee down on the table. He refuses to lose his composure, and knows that there’s so much that could go wrong without using protection. “Don’t do that.”

“I don’t know what you’re accusing me of doing, baby. I’m not doing anything,” you chuckle. Your hands crawl up his broad chest and even run over his hardened nipple through his shirt, and now he fucking regrets not wearing a tank top underneath. Slowly losing control over what his wife is doing to him, he tries to speak as you trail itty bitty kisses on his ear before biting it, making him sigh out a small “ahh” and losing his train of thought.

You kiss everywhere and anywhere you can get your paws on, persuading him with your body and your words.

“Mm, I mean think about it, B. We’ve got it all. A home with all this space, decent careers. Hell, since we got hitched my parents have even encouraged this,” you rub your hands down his back.

“Don’t you dare bring up your parents right now while I’m getting hard.”

“Hey, I’ve been riled up this whole time, so you can—“

Billy took your head in his hands and smashed your lips together, swirling his tongue with yours. Without any more convincing needed on his end, he effortlessly hitched you up in his arms and carries you to the couch. Unwilling and too impatient to take this upstairs, he could’ve fucked you right there on the floor and still be perfectly sated.

“Knew you didn’t have it in you,” you grin, before he sucks on your tongue again and pulling away for two seconds before telling you to shut the fuck up. He’s so ready to get down and dirty already, but he knows that that’s no way to fuck his wife. No no, what he’s gonna do is get back at you for making him choke on his coffee and not asking him about this in a professional manner. God, he swears he loves you more than anything, but sometimes, knowing the affect you have on him, he fucking hates you for using it all to his advantage.

Billy’s cock is like an annoying exclamation point in his jeans, and he thanks himself for going commando on the daily. He throws his belt harshly to the ground, the leather and buckle landing with a loud rattle and a thwack. You widen your eyes and let out a laugh in disbelief at his temper.

“Holy shit, you’ve got to calm down. You’re at a ten, and I’m gonna need you at like a seven.”

Billy growls like a jealous mutt, desperately picking at your items of clothing to be taken off for him to get down to playing with what’s his.

“Calm down, you’re telling me to fucking calm down after what you’ve done? Why don’t you take off your clothes already, or am I gonna have to do all this myself?”

Once in every while your husband gets so unbelievably bratty and childish when he’s horny that he’ll snap at you for taking your time, or even making fun of him in the heat of the moment. He’s dramatic now, but once he comes he’ll be back to normal and laughing about it later.

“Okay, okay, Mister Bossy. Take the piss out of it,” you grumble, still just as ready to feel Billy as he is to get inside you. You take time unbuttoning your flannel that you stole from your husband, getting stuck on the fourth button. Billy has to take the time to palm himself through his jeans for some sort of relief. He then rolls his eyes and whines after forty five seconds had gone by and you’ve somehow mysteriously forgotten how buttons work.

“Come the fuck on, babe, I’m kinda gonna bust on my own here.”

“I’m trying!”

“Not hard enough! You know what? Forget it,” he pulls the flannel down enough to expose your under shirt then pulls that down too. Exposing your breasts to his delight, he finally fucking gets to get his hands on you and he doesn’t wait around. He smiles like a maniac and puts his head down to nuzzle himself between your breasts, sucking absentmindedly on each one and then playing with them. You hum as he gives you the good treatment, sloppy kisses being plotted on the valley of your chest. After Billy feels like he’s had his fix, he moves on to pull your sweats off and rub you through your underwear. You’d gotten so goddamn soaked to the point of feeling the pool of it seeping through your panties. It nearly gives Billy fucking heart palpatations, seeing his absolute favorite sight of his wet wife all for him and his dick only.

Billy possessively, even devilishly, loves the idea of this belonging to his eyes and his touch only. No other bastard on planet earth is as lucky as he is, finding you, picking you. Hell, especially marrying you.

He has to swallow the drool that’s nearly started just looking at the gorgeousity. Without any further ado, he takes the hem of your underwear and plucks them right off, then discreetly puts them in his back pocket of his jeans for later. Pulling back to marvel at the sight of his beautiful wife with her tits hanging out of her flannel, otherwise completely bare for him to take her. Out of purely routine, he reaches for the pack of condoms that were hidden for you both underneath the couch cushion, until you grab his arm and shake your head with your teeth nibbling your bottom lip.

“Right. Sorry. Old habits die hard I guess,” he laughs, as giddy as a schoolboy looking up a girl’s skirt. He undoes his jeans and sheds them, fully remembering the gift he had snatched for himself still crumbled up in his back pocket. His middle finger has taken to rhythmic patterns on your clit before swooping down to you for a hot kiss.

“Fuckin’ gorgeous as always, babe. Married a goddamn pornstar, didn’t I?” he goes in for more, the sound of your lips smacking and your breathy groans to be heard throughout the living room. He switches his technique and swirls his pointer and middle fingers through your gushing slit and bringing it back up to your clit. You grind more into his hand as he takes your breast with his other hand that’s not driving you insane right about now.

“God, baby. I want — I want more, please? I need —“

“You gonna be good for me, hm? Gonna take it, and be more respectful next time you ask me for somethin’?”

“Yes! Yes I will, I am!” you almost want to fucking slap him for the sheer torture he’s putting you through, but it could be served as karma for what you did. But sue you if you weren’t gonna beat around the bush, okay? You’re straight up about what you want and when you want it from your husband. He’s even said before that that’s a quality he loves about you. He’s just as bratty and needy as you can be, which is what makes you the impeccable couple.

“That’s my girl. It’ll all happen soon, just be good,” he murmurs, gradually slowing down his fingers from you and then taking them out, giving them a lick. While maintaining eye contact, he takes the two fingers that had just been all over your clit, and sucks them hard in his mouth all the way down his knuckle. Satisfied with the wound up reaction he got outta you, he keeps one hand on your tits while the other snakes down to his own zipper. When he pulls it down, already exposing his junk given that since you two had been hitched he’d solemnly swear to go commando, always ready to give it to his needy baby. As he still palms your breast and pinches at your nipple, he starts to slowly jack himself slow and steady. Like he’s feeling Jesus, the man closes his eyes and stutters a sigh at how fucking amazing you make him feel.

You involuntarily open your legs wider, hoping the invitation will entice him to get busy and start fucking you raw, but the sight only motivates him to speed his own strokes on himself. Frustrated at the lack of attention you’re receiving, you huff and shove him with all the strength you have in your legs off of the couch. Billy is flown to the carpet floor, livid and cursing up a storm, which you expected and prepared for. He was just being a drama queen as always, and you order him to shut his nagging up before joining him on the floor and pulling him on top of you.

“Fucking brat,” he taunts adjusting you more to be perfectly open and ready underneath him.

“No, you are! I wasn’t just gonna sit there while you play with yourself,” you spit back, before both of you pause to start cracking up. He covers his face in his hands as his shoulders shake with every laugh, and you mirror his attitude.

“I love you so much, you know that?” Billy reminds you, giving your nose a kiss.

“We’ve been married for three years, Billy. I think I might know that by now,” you tease, patting his cheek with your palm before accepting another kiss. This one is much less hurried and dirty, but more tender and loving. It’d be sweet if he wasn’t about to fuck you bare on the floor for the first time in your entire marriage.

Billy lines up as he blows you a kiss, watching your facial expressions like a hawk to read how you’re feeling as he peeks just the tip through. He takes more time to run his dick along your entire slit to loosen you up a bit, and give your clit the attention it starves for. When he actually slides in, as bare as he was born, he furrows his brows and drops his jaw at the beautiful warmth. Having done this with a rubber like the million other times you’ve fucked, of course it satisfied him, felt just as amazing. But the extra intimacy being shared here is driving more and more blood down south far more rapidly than ever before, and he really has to clench and keep himself together to not ruin it by blowing his load early.

Your face says you’ve been dicked down to paradise, having an innocent open mouth smile appear as you groan at the fullness taking up your pussy. Billy is slow about picking up the pace, not wanting to turn into an animal quite yet, still enjoying the feeling of his wife’s bare wet cunt swallowing him up. Once he’s balls deep inside, so far and so big that he sees himself through your stomach, that’s when he starts to get a little more excited.

“Fuck, I love this pussy more than anything in the world,” he grunts, pulling all the way out and doing a rundown with his cock on your clit. He takes a moment to look downward at your joining togetherness, the picture so beautiful and right and wrong that he moans louder before needing to squeeze his eyes shut. After he’s got a better grasp on control, he then bows his head down low and spits a good amount down onto his cock, lubing you up way more than necessary. With the extra kick and slide that it gave the two of you, he starts not holding anything back. And then your husband goes to fucking town with his hips.

Billy starts getting real creative when building up more and more during this stage of sex, now doing figure eight’s with his cock inside you. He even starts pulling out of you to grind his length up and down, then repeating. Soon your howls and his yells as well as the fucked up and half assed dirty talk is all to be heard. Along with the slapping of flesh, which is music to Billy’s ears. He’s spouting nonsense about how heavenly your cunt feels wrapped around him, tight and nice. You’ve started grinding back into his thrusts, and like fucking rabbits, you both stutter a warning to the other about how close each of you are getting.

“Baby, ohmygod— so fuckin’ good, I’m gonna cum inside you, gonna give you all my damn kids, I don’t give a damn. You feel so amazing,” his hips go as fast as he can physically pull off, and you whine as he comes down to you and gives you a kiss that’s mostly just sharing his saliva.

“Ahh — I’m so close, it’s—“

“Do it, do it baby. Cum on your husband’s cock,” he begs, pace stuttering before he finally stills. With a low hum from you and a noisy groan from a very sweaty Billy, the ribbon finally snaps in both of you. He bursts, still staying deep inside you as his fingers fervishly rub the fuck out of your clit to help you find your orgasm on his dick. You squeeze around him while on cloud nine, making him yelp and milk more out of him that he didn’t know he had.

“Shit,” he sighs, not yet pulling out of you before wiping his forehead off and doing the same for you. You whimper at the emptiness when does, you and your husband trying to catch your breath. When he looks down he smirks at his scene of the crime dripping all the way down out of you. Without saying anything, he scoops it back up and rubs your clit another couple times, then copying his actions from earlier and sucking his fingers clean.

“I fucking loved that. If you’re knocked up right now, that’s not stopping me from doin’ that again,” he laughs, laying down beside you and taking your jaw before giving you a good loving post-sex kiss.

“Mm, I liked it too. Billy, I don’t wanna get up, can you grab me my panties? They’re around here somewhere,” you lazily point to the couch and the floor around you. Billy then snatched you up off the floor, you still very naked and filled save for his flannel. He tosses you on the bed as you land with a bounce and a giggle. Your husband throws you a water bottle and you catch it. Both of you chug more than half of it down as you still await for him to follow through with your request.

“Nope. No idea where they went, actually. Sorry babe,” he answers, casually throwing his jeans in the laundry basket you share and smirking to himself at the present still sitting in his back pocket.

—

I also hc Billy as a dude that takes his s/o’s underwear after sex lmao. oh if anyone’s wondering what im up to writing: I have 1k on the next chapter of girl next door and I’m still working on several asks:)

#billy hargrove x reader #billy hargrove smut #stranger things #billy hargrove imagine

[supportanimy]

Animals and Born To Be Wild - Yeah, and here are some adoption papers

Synopsis: BTBW's coach wants to get home to his daughters but meets some homeless orphans instead

Word count: 695

Notes: BTBW releases on Unlimited in a few more hours (I think)! Written for that

Stephen - BTBW

Stephen got out of the supermarket, after buying the last essentials for his daughters' trip. He was looking up at the nightsky, Oh right, tonight's a full moon. I guess I have to get home quick, when two young teenagers wearing motorcycle helmets suddenly popped out in front of him. 

"EXCUSE ME SIR, BUT IS THAT YOUR BIKE?!" the one with purple spikes asks, but it was more of a shout.

"Dude, lower your voice, everyone else is gonna hear it!" the other one, with a mohawk on his helmet, scolded Spikes. "But is it true, sir?! Is that really your bike?!"

"Jeez, calm down kiddos. Yes, it is, why do you ask?" One could feel the two's faces light up, even if it was covered by the faceshield. 

"SIR, IT'S SO COOL! COULD WE GET A RIDE?" "DUDE, I SAID LOWER YOUR VOICE! BUT CAN WE, SIR? PLEASE!" Even Mohawk was shouting now.

"Hey hey, don't shout! Aren't you two a bit young to be out this late? Where are your parents?" Stephen looked around for anyone trying to find their child. When he looked back at the teens, you could tell by their body language that they were nervous, maybe guilty about something.

"We, uh, we ran away from home," Mohawk nervously explained. "But it's not our fault! The caretakers were mean!" Spikes became quieter, but still shouting, in tone.

Stephen rubbed his temples. The full moon was almost visible. "Gosh, I'm gonna call-" "Please don't call the orphanage!" The two were in sync. "Or the police! Or CPS!" Spikes added. "What's CPS?" "I don't know, probably something American."

"-a hotel." "Oh. Why?" "You need somewhere to stay for the night. Unless you already have one?" "Well, we found this abandoned warehouse and did some sick dance moves-" "Spike I think he's gonna send us to a hotel anyways." "Oh, ok."

Before Stephen could finish dialing, his eldest daughter called him. "Dad, where are you?! It's a full moon tonight, you could accidentally transform anywhere!"

"Don't worry, sweetie, I'm just at the supermarket, I'll get home quick. Just gotta do something before that." "Alright, just please be safe." "I will."

He hung up and turned to the teens. "Okay, let's go!" "Weren't you gonna call first?" "Too late for that, we're just gonna go there and hope there's room for you two." "We'll get to ride on the bike?!" "No."

A few minutes later, "No vacancy?" Stephen sighs.

"Hey, should we really be following a stranger?" "He let us ride on those side things, we should totally!" "Older siblings really gotta deal with dumbasses, huh?" "Hey, you followed him too!"

I don't have time for this, Stephen thinks. "Say kids, do you really have nowhere to stay?" Spike shook his head. "Hmm, I guess we'll have extra space. My daughters are leaving tonight anyways."

"Woah, we get to stay with you?!" "..Yes." "Woop!" The two excitedly got back into the sidecar, without hesitation. "Hold on, I have to get much faster."

As the three rode, the two teens caught some blue fur growing from out of the adult's sleeve. "Should we tell him?" "Do NOT."

When they finally arrived at a small one-story house, an older teenage girl with blue hair tied in a bun with a pink bowtie on it opened the door. 

"Dad, where have you-Who are these two?" 

"Call me Hawk!" "And me, Spike!" She stares down at the two. "Hawk and Spike? What are you, fourteen?" she chuckles.

"Yes, in fact we are!" Spike proudly confirms. "Oh my god, Dad, is me and Sash gonna get younger bros?"

Hawk tilts his head. "What does that mean?"

"Nothing, let's get inside," the man pushes the younger teens in. Spike noted that the blue fur suddenly disappeared.

"Whatever Dad, me and Sash are gonna use your motorcycle, did you get the extra batteries?" 

"Here," he hands her a small plastic bag. "I also put some sweets for your sister." "Of course you did."

"Hey, just for tonight, could they use your rooms to sleep?" She eyes them, and gets closer to their face shield. "Don't touch my shit." "Aye aye, cap!"

-

Sorry that ended weirdly. But on the other hand, can y'all guess who his daughters are? I only described one of them but maybe you can guess, just try searching for a duet with two girls

Yes, that's a pic of Radical Alt, but they have the same coaches ok?!

#just dance fanfiction #just dance

[jq37]

May we have a recap, please? :)

**spoilers for panic at the art show and home for the holidays**

OK people. I actually don’t have a ton of commentary on these two so I’m gonna try and keep it (relatively) short and sweet [Edit from Future Me: Failed Step 1].

Also, iirc, this is the week Dropout starts streaming new Fantasy High eps on Wednesdays which is very dope and I am very excited for. I probably won’t do full on recaps like I do for normal eps because, lbr, I don’t strictly have the time to be recapping these eps at all and it’s pure stubbornness that keeps me from making wiser time management decisions. But, rest assured, if I have an Opinion, you will hear it whether you want to or not. 

Anyway, on with the show. 

Last recap, I mentioned that this ep was giving me Aelwen house party vibes and now it reminds me of that ep in another way: Everyone rolled like TRASH almost the entire ep. It was so frustrating! They barely got any hits in until like halfway through the ep.

(Aw man, I just realized I’m gonna have to remember which spelling of Aelwen is correct again now that FH is coming back.)

I love how Murph is immediately like, “I need to make sure my wife doesn’t die during this fight avenging her fictional husband.”

Isabella also has Aelwen’s trick of poofing around the battlefield which is annoying as hell (ha) for the group.

Siobhan hilariously casts fear on Priya just to be spiteful. I thought she was doing it to help the evac process but no. It was a purely spiteful action. Bless. 

When Kug turns into an ape he, of course, turns into *the* NY ape, King Kong. 

“I roll a nat 20 on an epic shit.”

When Brennan was describing Kingston’s spectral New Yorker Guardians I was already thinking about that one part of Spiderman 2 (the OG Toby Mac version) and then he straight up said, “You mess with one of us, you mess with all of us,” and I lost it.

“Deny the stairs the pleasure of my feet.” Emily is a poet.

I want to know what makes a pigeon spicy more than anything. 

The fact that Brennan killed Ox AGAIN and then immediately looked into the camera and let the audience know the dog was fine because he clearly Oracle stared into the future between eps and saw the entire internet sharpening their pitchforks  was so funny. 

About midway through the ep, Pete tries and fails to send Isabella back to hell and Isabella starts monologing about her plans and connection with Robert Moses (she stole the list from Santa and is/was gonna marry Moses apparently). I wonder if Brennan was like, “These players are for sure gonna murder her without getting any useful info out of her unless she goes full Bond Villain right now.”

And, proving my point, Emily immediately does 56 points of damage, royally f-ing Isabella up. 

This is a really civilian heavy fight which feels weird in a way the FH fights never did. Like, these aren’t even civilians who live in an adventuring town in a fantasy world. These are just normal ass civilians in the wrong place at the wrong time. 

Pete fails a wild magic roll after failing to teleport into the building and then gets a choice of getting really strong (which prob would have let him bust down the door) or to teleport in (which is what he does and exactly what he wanted). Very clutch when the dice rolls play into the story like that.

Kingston lightning bolts Isabella’s hair off which is just malicious but also totally called for.

On her next turn, Sophie gets hurt on purpose to get low enough to activate her ring, lets her hair burn for long enough to shorten it to a cute bob, insults Isabella, then knocks her tf out. 

I love that Emily took one of her teeth (a seemingly crazy move) and when called out by Lou was like, “It’s a link to Robert Moses” (a completely reasonable answer). That’s the Axford one-two punch.  

I didn’t mention it before but, Willie the golem is here, first immobile but then brought back by Misty. Post fight, he says he was somehow brought here by one of the evil factions of the city and says they’ll talk about it later. Also, Misty makes out with him (DON’T KINKSHAME HER).

With a high insight roll, Kingston is able to deduce that the group was ambushed (though not by Priya) and that their victory was a really important one for the fate of the city. 

(Sidenote: The amount that Pete is Over Priya in this ep is so funny.)

Back at Wally’s (which is where Kug is now staying) Wally has gotten Kug a dog bed to sleep in and fancy charcuterie cheese because he and Ricky are the only pure-hearted people in NYC. 

At the same time, Pete and Kingston have a very sweet heart to heart and then settle down at Kingston’s place to chill and listen to jazz. Idk how else we expected this to resolve, considering this is a Brennan Lee Mulligan DM’d show where the sacred pillars are Teamwork, Friendship, Communication, and Making up an NPC on the Fly Because One of Your PC’s Decided to do an Insane Thing. 

Next up is the Christmas ep and Brennan, Emily, and Zac are in sweaters for the occasion. 

Well,actually it’s the 21st and Emily immediately clocks that that’s the solstice. 

Are cookies the good carb?/Absolutely not. But have fun with your life. (I love Ricky’s soft jock energy.)

“I run deliveries,” Pete says to Kingston’s parents, not technically lying but also not being completely truthful. Misty would be proud. 

Going over to Misty, it seems pretty clear at this point (and it’s confirmed in the promo for next ep) that Misty’s fairy business is some kind of de-aging/reincarnation for herself. I wonder how many of these she’s done so far. She said she’s been around for, what? 200, 300 years? Assuming she’s been doing then reincarnations at about 65-70 years old and she reincarnates to around 25? Maybe 6 times? Idk. Just spitballing. 

Saucer of milk to keep the faeries from stealing her (non-existing) children. Faerie lore is wild y'all. 

Did you take another level of warlock?/Yeah bitch.

The fact that since Sophie has joined a monastery, she’s only taken Warlock levels and no Monk levels is very funny from a story perspective. It’s like, she finally comes to this sacred place to be trained to her full potential and she’s just spending what should be her sparring time playing with her cat in exchange for spells. Wild. 

Emily’s cat-like, self-satisfied grin when Brennan is like, “So you just jerry-rigged yourself clairvoyance powers, huh?” is so good. 

And she did it on the fly because Emily Axford is winning D&D. There are no points but she’s winning.

So, uh, Emily does, two things, very in character right after the other:

Thing number one: She send her unseen servant to spy on her family. Her dad seems hardline, “F, Dale. Whatever. Family first. She needs to get over it.” On the other side of the spectrum is her mom who is very upset about the whole affair with her siblings falling in the middle. 

The second thing she does, very casually I might add, is have her unseen servant BURN DOWN HER HOUSE SO SHE CAN COMMIT INSURANCE FRAUD.

EMILY

Everyone loses their minds and rightfully so. What a wild-ass swing that no one could have seen coming. I love it. 

“I look in my backpack which is now my home[…]" 

I almost forgot that Ricky was a fire fighter who would not abide that nonsense until Brennan decided to cut to him. 

Ricky just dolphin swims across the Hudson in 2.5 mins to go put out the fire that Sophie set. Amazing. 

Ally mocking Emily/Sophie: Truthfully, I don’t know what happened.

"I love John McClane, because he loves his wife.” WALLY

Wally: Oh we’re gonna tell a lie on Christmas.

“This is what winning looks like.”

I would really like to know what trace stuff what on the drugs Pete got from 7 but Ally rolled too low to figure it out.

“I disassociate fully." 

Well it took him a long ass time but glad to have Pete on the selling drugs to kids is bad train. Choo-choo, dude. 

7 saying you can hack in real life in reference to his AK-47 has the same energy as Hardison using the word hack in literally any semi-weird episode of Leverage. 

SOCIAL MEDIA IS VOLUNTARY PANOPTICON

So Kug goes with Wally to David’s house disguised as a dog and, despite that, blurts out that he’s his dad immediately. Well, he tries to. The Umbral Arcana stops him, unfortunately. 

"I lick my son’s face.” KUUUUG. 

Sophie showing up with a raw goose and hellish rebuking it is so metal and it’s a shame no one got to appreciate it. 

Me when Sophie’s Mom changes into black top in solidarity for Sophie’s mourning: F EVERY OTHER NON-SOPHIE BICICLETA. I RESPECT YOU. 

Kingston is hustling very hard to get his man Pete a job which is a very Kingston move. That’s how guys like that show affection. 

Didn’t mention it before but Kingston’s parents and Mom specifically adopting Pete is very cute. 

Sidenote: Idk what 7 was talking about Pete trying to stay low profile. He wears a cowboy hat (now a ZEBRA STRIPED one, courtesy of Kingston). I think the subtlety train has sailed my guy. 

Esther shows up at the firehouse, carrying presents for her mom and grandma and looking for Ricky. The says that she’s kinda dealing with something and it feels good to be around him (beat) magically speaking. Sure. I’m gonna keep my Hercules soundtrack on hand just in case anyway. 

I think Ricky is the only person who, with no pretense, could give his crush a sexy calendar featuring him.

Anyway, turns out Esther’s mom and grandma are the furies of Tompkins Square and she’s fated to join them or something. 

Esther causally: I defy you, I defy the prophecy.

The fury thing would explain why Esther’s mom would have cursed Kug. They are famously magical punishers.  

Ricky is a magically certified Good Boy but we been knew.

Zac’s restraint to respect Esther’s personal boundaries in lieu of getting a lore drop to stay true to Ricky’s character is amazing. Mad props.

So we slide over to Misty’s Christmas party which Stephen Sondhein is attending and him having a character card kinda killed me. 

There’s a post on tumblr somewhere about playing faerie  incapability for impoliteness against a vampires need to be invited in and that’s what I thought about when Moses and his vamp friends showed up at Misty’s house.

Robert tries to talk Misty into striking a deal with him for protection from Titania. She’s very much not having it.  

“You know Robert, I love a comedy and I love a farce. I’d like to remind you of who it is that started this and it’s not me and it’s not my friends but I can assure you Robert Moses that we will be the ones to end it if you do not. Do you understand me?” Damn. That’s a mic drop from Misty. 

[As I’m editing this, I’m realizing I somehow lost a BIG chunk of text. I’m not gonna write it all up again but the Cliffnotes are as follows:

Between the Solstice and Christmas, the gang goes Grand Central Station to see the clockwork gnomes that live there because trouble is apparently afoot. Some size changing nonsense happens and Pete shoots a dog (with mini bullets, the dog is fine). Lou is enchanted even though Kingston is not (a common theme with him). Ally and Emily are on the same nonsense wavelength (as usual). 

There are dope magical dragon trains under Grand Central Station that go to the shadow realm which is a place I’d like to know about. Kingston has never seen these trains before even though you’d really think he would have.  

Murph says Gnome Rights which is wild if you know what Naddpod is like. 

Anyway, the high priestess of the gnomes passed out the other day and they figure out it was due to pixie magic which is suspicious. They also know they pixies have access to a “time stone” which leads me to believe that it’s Brennan and not Aguefort who thinks that Chronomancy is the most powerful magic of all. 

Sophie and Jackson go to Dale’s grave on Christmas. Jackson explains that the Order of the Concrete Fist is basically a literal school of hard knocks. A counterbalance to all the reach for the stars dreaminess that comes with NYC.

Dale was their chosen one who was supposed to stop the monastery from falling when some unspecified badness crossed over to this side, but when he went to the place where he was supposed to get guidance, there was no one there (clearly tying in to what Dale said to Sophie last time they talked. I wonder what she needs to get to the top of? Empire State maybe?).

Watching Murph watching Emily, his real life spouse, play at grief for her fictional husband and do some truly insane things is so funny because you can clearly see him thinking, “I am married to this woman,” which, in fairness, is probably the main thing he’s thinking when he’s playing D&D with Emily.

I’m probably missing something but that’s all I remember. Back to post-Christmas!]

So it’s opening night at Misty’s show and, somehow, Ricky’s first show ever. 

I love that Don Confetti is there because of Siobhan’s offhanded comment for a handful of eps ago about him being a supporter of the arts.

Anyway, everything is going great until the second act when Titania busts in through the mirror which is *not* is storage as Misty requested but on stage. It’s a theater fight, y'all! And not the West Side Story kind although if that doesn’t come up I will be very surprised. 

“Let’s kill Titania!” –Misty in the promo

Just going straight to 11, huh Misty?

See y'all then!

#dimension 20 #the unsleeping city #d20 #asks #kickmuncher3

[pinkbubbles-and-bigtroubles]

Liability (Girls Talk Boys part 31)

The truth is I am a toy that people enjoy 'Til all of the tricks don't work anymore And then they are bored of me I know that it's exciting Running through the night, but Every perfect summer's Eating me alive until you're gone Better on my own

They say, "You're a little much for me You're a liability You're a little much for me" So they pull back, make other plans I understand, I'm a liability Get you wild, make you leave

BIG THANKS to Viv @toofadedtofight for her amaaazing cover of this song to go along with this chapter. You’ve been my rock through most of this series and I can’t thank you enough

Cher had just fed Ringo and was helping Camille go through her packing checklist. She was leaving tonight for Atlanta to promote ProFantasySports and to escort the winners of the PFS Super You, Super Bowl contest around the events. Her boss Stephen and co-worker Jake were also going on the trip but as Camille was quickly becoming the face of the company her schedule was jam packed. She had media events, live streams with the contest winners, and parties with players and agents.Camille was a ball of nerves as this was her first BIG event for the company. Stephen was with her for every media event and party, but the sheer scope of the audience intimidated her.

“Calum is driving you to the airport right?” Cher asked her.

“You know how he is,” Camille chuckled.

“Is he still pouting you're leaving for the week?” Cher asked.

“You know how he is,” Camille repeated, this time rolling her eyes. “I don't get it I'll be gone for days. He was gone for weeks.”

“You did snatch his soul just two days ago” Cher pointed out before her phone started going nuts.

“Who's that? Ashton?” Camille raised her eyebrows.

“No, it's Cody. He's still staying with his brother. He's still talking to Nick but I don't think they can fix it this time.” Cher sighed.

“They've both cheated before, what makes this different?” Camille asked.

“I think because it's Harry, someone who lives I the complex, that's bothering Nick. Maybe he's just sick of the drama who knows? I'm gonna go see him but I'll be back before you leave. I'm taking him some booze,” Cher told her.

“Tell Cody I still love him,” Camille called after her.

Camille had her suitcases on the bed going through them once more to make sure everything was right. As usual she had a color coded system to assist in packing and Calum was stretched across her bed helping her check off each item. He'd insisted on being the one to drive her to the airport and helping her pack so he could spend every minute with her before she left.

“Have you ever been to Atlanta?” Calum asked looking over her itinerary.

“No, I've hardly ever traveled. Anytime I got on a plane or was to Ohio or Florida to see grandparents,” Camille replied.

“I swear you're packing for me next time I go anywhere. I don't know how you stay so organized,” Calum shook his head as he watched her pack little items into small bags, small bags into bigger bags, and the big bags into her suitcase.

“It's one less thing to worry about. Also it makes me crazy to have to buy something I need at the last minute. I'm stressed out enough as it is about this whole trip.” Camille was bouncing on her toes as she paced nervously.

“Darling, you're going to be great. You're amazing at what you do and I couldn't be more proud. You need to calm down, come over here and let me help you with that, please?” Calum reached out and pulled her down next to him on the bed. Camille protested but Calum leapt up closed each suitcase and gently set it on the floor by the bed. He then laid Camille onto her back working his way between her thighs, pulling her jeans and panties down his mouth seeking her out. Soon his tongue was curling inside her, his hair clenched in her fists as he worked on getting her more relaxed.

“You didn't think I was going to let you leave without making sure you remember you're mine, did you?” Calum growled against her skin. His teeth marking her thighs as he left fingerprints on Camille's hips. He stood back up looking at her on the bed before him. Pulling off his shirt and hurriedly yanking his pants down and kicking them aside he was back on her in seconds.

“I'm all yours Calum, only yours.” Camille pulled him up to kiss him tasting herself on his lips.

“My darling Camille,” he murmured in her ear as he thrust inside her rocking his hips against hers.Camille loved how Calum could be rough yet gentle and caring at the same time. How his rings could bite into her skin as he smacked her ass at the same time that he was smothering her in kisses all while driving her closer to her orgasm. As they lay there afterwards Calum checked the time.

“We have a couple hours before we have to leave. Let's double check everything and then I want you back in this bed. I'm not done with you yet.”

Cher knocked and waited a couple minutes before knocking again. The door swung open to reveal a red faced and bleary eyed Cody.

“You look like shit,” Cher didn't mince words.

“Well fuck you too bitch, did you bring liquor?” Cody snapped. Cher raised her eyebrows and a bag full of clinking bottles.

“That's my girl,” Cody grabbed the bag and kissed her cheek. Cher went inside and the place was a wreck. There were empty bottles, dirty clothes and fast food wrappers everywhere as Cher picked her way to the living room. Cody's brother Cayden was always a slob and it pained Cher to see her friend living like this.Cody cracked a bottle of vodka and took a swig. “Are you staying to get drunk with me?” He asked.

“Cody what the hell are you doing? This isn't the first time you and Nick have broken up. You said yourself y'alls relationship has been problematic from the beginning.” Cher wanted to cut through Cody's theatrics to get to the real problem.

“Everything is just fucked now,” Cody set the bottle down on the table to rest his hands in his head. “Nick told me he hasn't been happy for a while now. He'd been holding on hoping that somehow we could turn this around, fix it and build it back up.”

“Why can't you though if that's what you both want?” Cher questioned.

“Because he doesn't want that anymore. He's cheated, I've cheated...hell he even fooled around with Harry himself before we ever knew each other. It's just gotten to the point where we're both tired of trying again, if we were really in love we wouldn't keep hurting each other like this,”  Cody looked miserable but resigned.Cher started to protest but Cody stopped her “Cher it's done, we're selling the condo and moving on.”

“Cody YOU CAN'T!” Cher was stunned. “You can't move away. You're always gone for work if you move I'll never see you.”

“I can't afford it on my own, even if I could I doubt he'd sell out to me,” Cody sighed. “I don't know what to do.”

“Don't do anything until I can talk to Camille and my lawyer. We'll figure something out, I promise. You just have to get a little time,” Cher met his eyes as she grabbed his hands.

Cody felt hopeful for the first time in days. Maybe his girls could help him figure everything out.

“Oh my God Calum I'm gonna be sore tomorrow,” Camille stretched and snuggled her head into Calum’s chest.

“Good,” Calum laughed and pinched her ass causing Camille to giggle. She rolled off the bed and grabbed her robe to walk to the bathroom.

He started to follow but she stopped him “we have to leave in forty minutes you stay here and put your pants on. I'm going to get cleaned up.” Camille laughed as she headed down the hall as Calum stood up grabbing a towel and his pants.  Sitting back on the bed he flipped through her itinerary again this time spotting a few things he hadn't noticed before. Camille came back from a quick shower and began getting dressed pulling on black yoga pants, pink Nike air max sneakers and Calum's green Empathy hoodie she was stealing for the week.

“Babe I wish you could come with me. I'm going to miss you,” Camille began to apply a little bit of makeup. She wasn't famous enough to get attention but there were enough photographers around the Super Bowl that Camille wanted to look good just in case.

“I'm sure you'll be too busy to notice,” Calum muttered his voice low. Camille laughed “have you seen my schedule? I'm going to be too busy to remember my own name.”

“Just hope you remember you have a boyfriend.” Calum replied just loud enough for Camille to hear him.

Camille tried to laugh it off “don't be silly babe, like I could ever forget you.”

“Well you know how you forget things,” Calum had a tone in his voice that was impossible to ignore.

“Okay what's that supposed to mean?” Camille put down her makeup brush and turned to face him.

“Just that it's convenient that you forgot to mention you'd be at a party with Quentin. Your ex boyfriend that seems to pop up from time to time.” Calum grumbled.

“No, no that's not how it is. You've had that itinerary for two weeks now. I never hid anything from you. That party is hosted by Brandon Pearcy, Quentin's agent, he was at the New Years Eve party. Brandon is the agent to several big name NFL players and getting to know him is a smart business move.” Camille spoke slowly trying to remain calm.

“Don't talk down to me,” Calum huffed “I know who he is. He was shamelessly flirting with you at that party until I showed up. Besides don't act like you've never kept a secret from me.”

“What are you talking about and why are you doing this? I've never kept any secrets from you.” Camille was baffled but starting to feel her temper rise.

“Oh so you weren't keeping secrets for Harry?” Calum's voice was accusing.

“Be serious!” Camille shot back. “That's not even fair. Cody and Harry had nothing to do with you, I found out by accident and it wasn't my business to tell anyone. That was more for Cody, who has been my friend for years, than Harry.”

“So you admit you were keeping a secret?” Calum asked her again.

“This is ridiculous. This has nothing to do with Cody or Harry so stop pretending it does.” Camille put her hands on her hips, her face flushing pink.

“Okay fine, I don't like that you didn't tell me you were going to a party your ex boyfriend is going to be at,” Calum was on his feet now pacing around the room.

“You know Quentin is actually playing in the Super Bowl. His agent is the one throwing the party. I don't know who might show up, and my boss will be at the party with me.  As much fun as the Super Bowl is may I please remind you that for me this is a work event. I am working this entire week.” Camille rubbed her eyes feeling the beginnings of a headache.

Calum felt his stomach turn, this was all coming out wrong but he couldn't stop himself. “No I get it, your job is more important to you than our relationship,” he regretted the words the second they left his mouth.

“Are you serious? Yes actually it is, you mean the world to me Calum, but this is how I make a living. I don't know what the hell has gotten into you, but I have worked way too hard to build myself a career to throw it away because you're in a shit mood.” Camille squared her shoulders not willing to back down.

“Right, even if that means cozying up to your ex to get ahead,” Calum looked down at the floor.

"What the fuck? I slept with him three times Calum. He knows we're together. I don't understand why you're throwing him in my face. I only dated him, in part because I had a huge crush on you." Camille protested.

"Don't turn this on me, I didn't make you fuck him. Yeah I don't like knowing guys like that are gonna be crawling on you for days. You pretend you don't realize they're flirting with you but you're not stupid. You're a pro at handling people and charming men.” Calum was yelling now.

“That's not fair, you know it's my job!” Camille protested.

“ I don't care, I fucking hate that you're going to be getting hit on by guys that are better than me.  NFL  guys who are tall, rich, have big  muscles, tattoos, with 6 pack abs and flashy cars. The agents who are older and smarter than me. Who have boats and seaside houses to impress you with. They can talk to you about football, but I guess I can always console myself with the idea that it'll be my face you picture while you're cumming on his cock." Calum regretted the words as soon as they left his mouth.

“No, we're not doing this right now. I am getting ready to leave for the biggest week of my career, and you've decided to throw a tantrum.” Camille was on the verge of tears. She heard the front door open and knew Cher was home.

“Camille...” Calum started but Camille shook her head.“You need to leave, I'm done with this conversation,” she was glaring at him, angry and hurt.

“Camille please,” Calum tried again.

“Get OUT!” Camille shouted.

“FINE.” Calum raised his voice to match hers before slamming her bedroom door on his way out.

Cher heard the loud voices when he came home and rolled her eyes not surprised they were fucking right up until they had to leave. It took her a second to realize they were fighting, Cher jumped when the door slammed and Calum came thundering down the stairs. His face was red with fury and she could see tears starting to fall.

“Calum what the hell is going on?” Cher asked completely shocked.

“She broke up with me,” his voice was ragged and caught in his throat.

He ran out the back door and Cher couldn't move for a second. She heard the sound of glass breaking upstairs and it snapped her back to reality.

You need to check on Calum... they broke up. Cher texted Ashton and headed upstairs to put Camille back together and get her on a plane.

@biba3434 @babygirlcashton @kiiiimberlyriiiicker1995 @slimthicccal @vfdsstuff @unabashedlymyself @5sos-ficssmut

#yeah that happened #calum hood #calum 5sos #calum hood imagine #calum hood smut #luke hemmings #luke hemming imagines #ashton irwin #ashton 5sos #luke 5sos #michael clifford #michael 5sos #5sos imagine #girls talk boys #calum hood blurb #5sos fanfic #5sos smut #5sos blurb

[yaaahbaekhyun]

WRITER’S BLOCK (1)

Genre: Fluff / Angst / Smut 

Pairing: BaekhyunxOC

Summary: You were an aspiring writer looking for new ideas for your first ever novel. It wasn’t easy as you thought it would be considering the writer’s block you always seem to have. Just when you were on the brink of giving up an inspiration came out of nowhere. An inspiration that goes by the name of “Byun Baekhyun”

A/N: Okay! I know, I still have another Baek story to finish but I just wanted to post this one since it had been in my drafts for a long time lmao I hope y'all support this one as well! And also!!! It’s my first time writing smut so please tell what y’all think hehe 

I REVISED THE SMUT I HOPE Y’ALL LIKE IT! ENJOY!!!

You gulped down your coffee to the last drop. It was your second cup for the night. You were currently seated in front of your study table, fingers lingering on the keys of the laptop. The blank page of the untitled word document glaring at you, mocking you.

You heaved a sigh.

You got out of college 8 months ago. No, you are not a graduate. You decided to drop out 2 months into the school year out of impulse. It wasn’t because you were stupid or anything, it was just because you lack any kind of motivation for studying and plus, you didn’t think you’d need any of what they offer in school for your dream job. You aspire to be a best-selling novelist.

Your parents weren’t against it, but they weren’t really supportive of the idea either. They just let you do what you want since it’s your life. They would sometimes try offering you financial support or ask you to come back home so you would have less expenses but you were a strong independent woman who doesn’t need to live off of her parents money (and truth be told, you were kinda embarrassed and you wanted to prove something to them).

“Ahhhhhh fuck me,” You cursed under your breath. You just wanted to write but this writer’s block always seem to have kept you company. Every time you tried starting on a story, you’d end up clueless on where the storyline was heading so you were always back to square one: and that is struggling to find a solid plot until the wee hours of the night. Who would’ve known your dream would be this hard to attain?

Looking at the clock, you realized that it was already 4 in the morning. You aren’t going to be able to write anything again, you deduced. You needed to rest since tomorrow was Friday. It was your last working day and your shift starts at 9 am. You couldn’t wait for the weekend to roll so you could focus more on your writing (or more like staring at your laptop and and having a mental breakdown).

You recently found work in a coffee shop near your apartment building. It was also near a university which was why it was always flocking with students. The pay was good, it was enough to keep you fed and off the streets. But you weren’t going to settle down with that kind of job. You were going to put Stephen King, J.K Rowling, and John Green to shame! You were gonna go places! But as of now, the only place you can afford is the small gloomy apartment you’re living in.

Taking off your glasses, you stood up from your chair. You almost fell because your legs were numb, like thousands of tiny ants were biting them. This was probably because you spent hours in the same sitting position.

You sighed again.

As you laid down on your bed, thoughts about your life choices entered your mind. You were really contemplating now whether it was a right choice to pursue a writing career. You were just so so close on giving up.

You didn’t get any sleep that night.

“Hey there buttercup, why the long face?” Sehun said when he joined you behind the counter while putting on his apron.

Sehun was your coworker. You take turns on managing the counter and serving customers. You also help each other on kitchen duty. You’ve only known him for 2 months but it felt like you’ve known him for years. When you two met, you just instantly clicked.

Unlike you though, Sehun was only working part time. He was studying Visual Arts in the university near the coffee shop. Sehun didn’t need to work for money, that much you’ve learnt. When you asked why he was working, he told you the sole purpose was to “hone his interpersonal skills”.

He was a really good-looking man, you actually had a crush on him on your first day of work but when you overheard him calling someone “baby” on the phone, you knew he was off limits. He even showed you a picture of his girlfriend. Son Eunbi. Cute petite girl. Short brown hair that falls midway on her long beautiful neckline. She probably has a great personality too, you thought. Sehun even said he’d let you meet her. Next time, you would say.

“I just didn’t get much sleep is all.” You replied, leaving out the part where you couldn’t type in a single sentence on your laptop 5 hours ago.

“How’s writing?” He asked voice sounding genuinely curious.

“Ugh. Don’t even ask.”

“Writer’s block still won’t let up?”

You nodded tiredly and he gave you an apologetic smile.

“Maybe this writing thing isn’t for me.” You said while you continued brewing coffee.

“Maybe I was meant to be a coffee expert. Or a coffee police. Hands in the air! You are selling bad coffee! .....Or something like that.” You jested but half meant it. If it was the you months ago, giving up wouldn’t be an option. But considering your current state, it looks like giving up is the only option.

“Hey don’t say that, sugarplum.” You rolled your eyes playfully at his endearment. He had a knack of calling you these weird nicknames because he finds it amusing.

“I think you just need a little break.” He added, appearing at your side, leaning against the counter.

“Tell you what, there’s going to be a party tomorrow at my friend’s house. He throws the most turnt up parties ever like seriously! The unlimited booze, horny fuckers grinding up against each other, deafening music, and all the made up games just to have an excuse to drink and make out….” He smiled at you.

“And you’re coming with me.”

He didn’t even ask you if you’d want to come, he already decided for you. You chuckled. Typical Sehun.

“Well, I have been so uptight lately.” He nodded in agreement.

“And I do need some kind of relief….” 

“Yeah and this would be a really great way to loosen up. Maybe you’d even find something to write about in the party- Oh! Eunbi will be there too! You’ll finally get to meet her!” He exclaimed looking so excited.

“Alright. This better be a hella turnt up party, Oh Sehun.”

“Don’t worry, hotdog. Jongdae never disappoints.” He winked.

The bells chime as a customer walks in, signaling the start of your busy day.

Saturday came faster than you thought. You finished dolling up and you were just waiting for Sehun to come and get you. You insisted that you’d just arrive on the venue by yourself but being the stubborn Sehun he is, he insisted on going together.

You were checking yourself out in the mirror when your eyes suddenly drifted to your study table, laptop untouched.

You shook your head. No, you were not going to think about that right now. Today is going to be consist of full blown make out sessions with strangers and going home with them, pissed drunk.

“Fuck writing! I’m getting dick tonight!” You said to yourself with new found determination. Just then, there was a knock on your door.

You opened it and was greeted by a very stunning man.

“Wow, you look like someone who’d get laid.” Sehun whistled lowly while he eyed you, a lopsided smirk playing on his lips. “Because that’s what I intend to do, get laid. Now shut up and bring me where the party at, lover boy!” You marched towards the lift.

“Eager, aren’t we?” He chuckled and followed suit.

Sehun’s girlfriend came in to view as you approached his car. She smiled at you and you smiled back with the same warmth she was emitting.

“Hi, you must be Y/N. I heard a lot about you from Sehun.” She said holding out a hand to you.

“And you must be the famous Son Eunbi. I can say the reverse is true, too.” You grinned and shook her hand.

You three chatted for the whole ride. You were already liking Eunbi and it was apparent that she was also growing comfortable with you too.

When you arrived at the house party, everyone was already under the influence of alcohol and blasting music. Everywhere you look, there would be people grinding up against each other, grabbing asses and are just practically fucking in front of your very eyes.

It looked wilder than any party you have been to.

Sehun appeared next to you and put his arm around your shoulder. He took in a deep breath and spoke, “Ahhhhhhh nothing but the smell of drunken regrets……so, what’ya think boobear?” 

“This is going to be so fucking lit.”

You move your way to the kitchen to refill your cup. You have been dancing and making out with almost every boy at the party. Everyone seemed to want to get their hands on you, probably because you’re fresh meat in their eyes.

As you reached the kitchen, Sehun was mixing bright color liquids in his cup. He turned his head towards you and he had a sheepish smile on his face. It was evident that he’s drunk since he was a little red and you knew he wouldn’t drink that if he was in his right state of mind. That drink in his hand screamed “Death”

“Where’s Eunbi?” You asked when you reached him.

“Just chatting with some of her friends.” He shrugged and you nod in understanding.

“How are you feeling?” 

“Never been better! This is a really good way of loosening up. I feel so great!” You beamed at him which caused him to laugh. You were more bouncy and animated than usual, all the alcohol you drank making its way through your system.

As you were filling your cup with who-knows-what, your eyes scanned the living room to look for a new victim.

Your eyes landed on the boy on the couch with a girl sitting on his lap, casually conversing with another boy beside him.

The girl was rubbing circles on his chest sensually and sometimes would even kiss the base of his neck but he didn’t seem to be fazed by it because the conversation they were having didn’t stop.

“Who’s the guy?” You asked Sehun. He followed your line of vision and smirked slyly when he saw who you were looking at.

“Ahhhh that my dear, is the Byun Baekhyun. He’s an art major like me. He’s in some of my classes but I never really talked to the guy, he doesn’t look like someone who’d want casual talk. He’s really famous in school for his art works and his cocky personality. Though I must warn you before you plan on doing anything stupid, Baek’s a huge playboy. Rumor’s had it he even had an orgy with the most popular girls in our school and he was the only boy there.” Sehun chuckled at that and raised his cup. “Salute.”

You digested everything Sehun was saying while you took in Baekhyun’s appearance. His raven black hair was messed perfectly, bed hair but it looked like all the strands stuck out to the right places the moment he got out of bed. He was wearing a silk navy blue button up that was impractically unbuttoned halfway, revealing his smooth chest. He looked like a fucking man whore but he made it look fashion. 

“Typical artistic playboy.” You murmured, taking a swig from your cup.

“I wouldn’t say typical….there’s really more than meets the eye with that guy.” And just as Sehun said the word eye, Baekhyun shifted his gaze in your direction, making eye contact. Your heart skipped a beat but not in the way you want it to.

He was from across the room and the way he was looking left your mouth slightly agape. He had a smug look on his face while he raised his cup to your direction. Coming back to your senses, you did the same. He then returned his attention to the guy he was talking to.

Byun Baekhyun has definitely piqued your interest.

He looked fine as hell and all you wanted in that moment was to be that girl on his lap. You’ve made up your mind. Byun Baekhyun was your next target.

“Hey Sehun! Aren’t you going to introduce me to your cute friend over here?” A guy called out to the tall man sitting beside you. You recognize him as the guy Baekhyun was talking to earlier. You were currently on the couch where they were sitting a while ago. When they left, you and Sehun headed there and Eunbi joined soon after.

“Oh hey! This is Y/N, Y/N this is Jongdae, the one who’s throwing the party.” Sehun said. Jongdae smiled at you cheekily and held out a hand. You took it and he kissed the back of it. You giggled at that which made Sehun gag. 

“Well before I throw up at you guys, I’m gonna dance with my girlfriend now so if you may excuse us.” Sehun said while he stood up, pulling an obviously wasted Eunbi to the dance floor.

“How about you? Wanna dance?” Jongdae offered with a glint of mischief in his eyes. This boy seriously looks like he is always up to no good. You agreed nonetheless, the alcohol in your system deciding for you.

You ended up on the center of the dance floor, your chest pressed up against Jongdae’s considering how a lot of people were dancing as well. You were swaying your body when someone from behind you snaked an arm to your waist which made you turn your head to the side. You would’ve regretted it if you were sober since now your face was so close to Baekhyun’s neck but you were pissed drunk so you were unfazed. You could smell his musky scent that was just luring you to bite him. Looking up you saw that he was staring intently at you. He had eyeliner on which only helped accentuate his fierce gaze. You ended up resting your head on his shoulder shamelessly. He smirked.

“I think I’ll take it from here, Jongdae.” Baekhyun said while he rubbed the side of your waist sensually. You didn’t see the exchange of knowing glances and the silent agreement between the two boys but before Jongdae left, he kissed you on the cheek. “Stay safe, kids!” He shouted over the music and he was gone.

“Baekhyun.” The man who had a hand on your hips introduced.

“I know who you are.” You said and started swaying to the music. He raised a questioning brow but went behind you and started moving in sync with you.

“How so?” He asked half curious and half teasing.

“I might have asked about you a while ago.” You shrugged. You felt his hot breath brush your ear as he leaned forward.

“Well at least now I’m sure I’m not the only one interested.” He chuckled huskily and you pressed your ass a little bit more to his crotch. He held onto your hips firmly as you both grind against one another. “Fuck, Y/N….”  The way your name rolled off his tongue made you shiver. “How do you know my name?”

“I might have asked about you, too.”

It was you who smirked this time as you took your sweet time moving your body in tantalizing waves making Baekhyun more intoxicated than he already was. “How about we take this somewhere more private?”  

“Aren’t you being too forward, Mr. Byun?” You asked breathlessly because damn, Baekhyun sure knew how to work his charm. With the way his body moved with yours and the way his voice lowered an octave was doing magic to you.

“I’m doing us both a favor here, sweetheart. I think we can both agree we want the same thing from each other…so how about we cut the small talk short and get straight to the action?” He growled and bit your earlobe. It was the only encouragement needed when you quickly took his hand and made your way across sweaty bodies to go outside. Everything was happening so fast but the alcohol was making you act without thinking. 

You both gripped onto each other as you stumbled inside your apartment, your sloppy kisses unceasing. He helped you remove your coat and you shrugged it off sighing in content when you felt the cool air hit your skin. 

He helped you with the rest of your clothes until you're only left in your undergarments. "Black lace, huh? Looks like someone really planned on getting laid tonight..." He was eyeing you up and down drinking in your visuals. As an art major and a guy who had slept with tons of women, Baekhyun could say your body was truly a masterpiece. His gaze on you darkened immensely as he imagined ramming himself hard and deep in your tight cunt. The fervor made his imagination run wild as you were both back on each other, making your way to the bed.

Of course, not wanting to be the only one vulnerable, you ripped his button up shirt hastily causing one or two buttons to fly somewhere in the room. He bit your bottom lip harshly which made you hiss. He pushed you a little, "What the fuck? You better fucking pay for this. This is designer." 

You ignored him and continued your assault as you unbuckled his belt, surprisingly enough you skillfully removed it and had his pants off him in no time. He was left as bare as you and you licked your lips when you saw the undeniably big tent straining in his boxer shorts. He raises an eyebrow and looked smugly at you. "Like what you see?" You rolled your eyes. 

"I just hope you fuck fast as much as your smart mouth moves." You retorted. He chuckled as he snaked his arms around your waist. His hot breath fanning your swollen awaiting lips as he whispered, "Oh wouldn't you want to know." 

The kisses you shared were nothing passionate and sweet and you weren't complaining. It was full of tongue action and leaving purplish bruises to remind you the next day of the one night stand you had. You weren't looking for someone who'd make love to you and care for you when you went to the party. You were looking for someone who'd fuck you senselessly until you cum so hard and forget all the thoughts that troubled you. And Baekhyun was more than willing to be that someone. 

He trailed wet kisses down to your cleavage and you arched your back for him to expertly unclasp your bra. He took one nipple in his mouth and skillfully swirled it with his tongue while he played the other with his fingers. You moaned shamelessly, loving the attention he's giving your breasts. You bucked up so his hips would meet yours and he groaned in response. 

Usually, you were into foreplay. But being sexually frustrated for weeks now, you just wanted Baekhyun to be inside you. Your wet pussy was rubbing so sensually with his hard meat and it just felt so good you almost came. "I think now's a good time to fuck my brains out, Baek..." You moaned in his ear. "A girl who knows what she wants..." He trailed off as he immediately flipped you on all fours. "That's fucking sexy." 

His other hand held your upper body down to the mattress while the other was on your side to keep your hips on sticking upwards. He pulled your panties down to your knees and positioned his cock at your entrance. "Ah shit...." You buried your face on the pillow as he entered you not too gently. 

"Oh fuck.....Y/N you feel so good..." He groaned as he started moving his hips, already finding a steady pace. Having Baekhyun inside you felt like you were on cloud nine. His cock made you feel so full and you knew this would be one of the best sex you'd ever have with a stranger. The sexual tension you felt between you two were just shown with every hard thrust he did. He went faster and harder and you just knew you'd be sore tomorrow morning. 

The way he pounded you from behind was just so overwhelming and intense you were having a hard time keeping your hips up. Baekhyun noticed this so he put both of his hands on you hips while he gripped tightly, sure to leave a bruise on your pelvis. 

He hit a certain spot which made you moan his name wantonly as you clenched your pussy more making his thrusts grow erratic. 

"I'm coming..." You panted. 

He reached out a hand to your clit and rubbed furiously. You shouted his name as you came. Baekhyun followed with a load groan as soon as he felt your tight snatch convulsing around his dick. You felt his cum fill you up and you hummed in satisfaction. 

You fell face first on the bed as he pulled out and collapsed beside you. He spoke breathlessly after a few minutes, "You take pills?" 

"I think it's a little too late to ask that but yeah I do." You replied still having your eyes closed. You were still trying to catch your breath when he flipped you on your back and hovered over you. You opened your eyes and was met with his dilated pupils, already feeling something hard nudge on your opening. 

"Then that means we're far from done, sweetheart."

#baekhyun #byun baekhyun #baekhyun smut #baekhyun angst #baekhyun fluff #baekhyun fanfic #baekhyun scenario #baekhyun au #baekhyun fic #baekhyun fanfiction #exo #exo angst #exo smut #exo fluff #exo au #exo scenario #baekhyun scenarios #exo scenarios #exo fic #exo fanfic #exo fanfiction

[go-redgirl]

The Senate Votes To Approve The Controversial Spending Caps, Debt Ceiling Bill. The Final Passage Vote Was 67-28. This Bill Now Goes To President Trump to sign.

The Senate votes to approve the controversial spending caps, debt ceiling bill. The final passage vote was 67-28. This bill now goes to President Trump to sign.

_____________________________________________________________

INDIVIDUALS/COMMENTS/POSTS:

Steven Jones ​yep! Torrok 01 is a paid Leftist TROLL! Everyone just iggy it. Bye Troll! no one cares anymore about you internet morons.

Ya'akov benAwake ​Citizenship question on census please .

Phil Mueller ​Vote Trump to protect America from socialism

caro sato ​1000 dollars for everyone is a Ponzi scheme

Destiny Menzies ​Yeah because y'all are lining your pockets with it rather then spending the money on what it was meant for!!! Gggggrrrrr wake up people!!!

Uganda Knuckles Christ ​ANTIFA = terrorisme

greywolfe ​TRUMP 2020👍

Rod Bender ​the census aids gerimandering

HK ​Artemis Fow Thank you i was confused 😸

Drill Bit ​torrok 01​, Yea, That*s why he gives his Salary to Charity.

Star Dust ​What did you do with those taxes before Trump became President ? Talk to Obama about high drug prices.. He did that

Merlin Krisp ​Where’s my royals Roy’s 😂😂 JK

andrew richardson ​Balance the G da..mn budget, get your sh..t together CROOKS

John Ortiz ​War famine diseases natural disasters and civil war is coming soon to America. Christians prepare

text kite ​CREEPER, AW MAN

Joey Big Things Poppin ​The kids shouting for Trump is because their parents are part of the 1%. while these children never worked a day in their life ,college paid for lmfao..

Havefunplayguitar ​Baltimore? Send money I need to pay my beach house mortgage

Why are you so Angry? ​Thats what we pay you clowns to do! Do your jobs, or fear, fear our LIBERTY!

torrok 01 ​If you make $50k a year Trump tax cut gave you $570. If you make $1m it gave you $70k. Is that fair? I would rather $1k a month

Annika_green ​@Joey that’s a broad generalization .

awildbill rightous ​HK ,, may the force be with you!👀👌

Happy Voice ​tax cuts for the rich lead to higher deficits and diminishing returns for the country

Travis Jackson ​Our President Trump is making Me proud.

GDPops ​Government shouldn't spend money they don't have. TRY DOING THAT AT HOME

Fuzz Man ​1 state 1 vote

Rebecca Brown ​Trump 2020!

Nothing ​Vote for democrats if you want your cities filled with 💩💩💩 and 💉💉💉

Edward Wallace ​Government bad answer to all problems. Marianne Williamson 2020

Mo Hamhead ​If it was up to me there would be zero free stuff for lazy unambitious parasites

nighttr ​I have an idea lets give the super wealthy a tax break,

Danny Hemphill ​the people that make a lot of money pay a lot of taxes idiot

Ramiro Garcia ​RINO'S & DEM'S SUCK.

David Hensley ​shut down the government good do it

Merlin Krisp ​True Danny 👍

richardcvlr5 ​there's creepy joe he's moving kinda slow in the men's room.

IR_Dankenstein ​Will there still be gummy bears? If not, it's on like Donkey Kong!

Drill Bit ​46% of people, don*t pay taxes.

Why are you so Angry? ​Many take pride in the fact that their children are made to work in honorable situations, with the word of god in their hearts, integrity in their minds, and a knowing of behavior. Who made you stupid

torrok 01 ​$1000 a month to everyone stimulates growth better than giving money to the rich

Havefunplayguitar ​I was blocked

abc def ​Joey why u watch fox,no tin foil hats here

Friendly Tourist ​I ❤ Cop Splash 💦🐖🐖

Niobokupletskite ​i say having it in your hand now is better then going out and find it

Uganda Knuckles Christ ​trump 2020 Landslide

HoarderCatG ​Nicole junkermann

Rod Bender ​people that make 12k a year and afford 1k per year taxes dumbocrats

awildbill rightous ​Master Jedi Trump leading the Jedi now! 2020 The lightside will defeat the darkside!🤜

Amy Tyler ​🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬🚬

Bob A ​Richard he’s in there with booker

Rebecca Brown ​We The People demand Term Limits for congress and grandfather the limits.

Annika_green ​If there’s a crash & the bankers and corps get bailout, I will be upset!!! I think a check one time to WE THE PEOPLE IS FINE

Fuzz Man ​all the money all the billionaires in the world has would not pay for dems dreams

Dan Williams ​if there is more of something, does it increase in value?

Edward Wallace ​So don't spend pay the dog gone debt. Marianne Williamson 2020

Last Days ​What a fool. OH BUT THEY want to give everybody free S___! to put that debt on the backs of his grands

origine online ​Free education Free medical 5 weeks vacation bigger salary thx , try to be more like my friends in europe

Joey Big Things Poppin ​Never watched fox ever.. Alphabet

Happy Voice ​Raise taxes to reduce the deficit and fulfill budget shortfalls, it's not rocket science. Can't tighten the belt much more.

Stephen Rothwell ​maybe the good senators can donate his salary and half his net worth if he loves the kids so much

L Yachty ​TRUMP 2020

MsMyxlplyx

​CUT SPENDING....START WITH CONGRESS PORKERS Welcome to live chat! Remember to guard your privacy and abide by our community guidelines. LEARN MORE

Leandro Garcia ​leave here , and go to the CSPAN live stream if you like

window789456123 ​trump 2020

Mo Hamhead ​There's too much parasite and not enough host now

Steven Jones ​do not buy the 1% LIE! That is all it is. LIES! Taxes went to everyone almost. THIS IS A LIE!

Why are you so Angry? ​Get a job, vote the Nanny government OUT of OUR lives! Figure it out, grow up. Most of us do, with or without the perpetually pubescent.

Danny Hemphill ​oh yes. free this free that equals loss of freedom

Blue Wizard ​🏆TRUMP 2020🏆

nighttr ​Trump supporters sure could use the free education

Drill Bit ​The rich make their money just like you do. Have you ever been hired by poor person???

torrok 01 ​Google Andrew Yang and check out his policies

Merlin Krisp ​Shut up 🤐

KritterKracker ​It's called stealing from Peter to pay Paul

De Dowd ​this guy is a Phoney Windbag! All talk and no action as long as his palm is greased with cash. Just watched a press conference in Baltimor and the Feds are cracking down on the drug dealers. Finally!

andrew richardson ​torrok 01, you sir, are an idiot, don;t breed

GDPops ​$22,022,376,894,711.12 National Debt

Kirrsty Locklear ​this dude is full of it our money is being stolen and not spent on the issues and foreign countries ain't paying their bills

Havefunplayguitar ​Why am I being censored?

Uganda Knuckles Christ ​Eat bacon our leave USA🥓

Amy Tyler ​This is so interesting! NOT!

Nothing ​no such thing as free you will have uneducated taxpayers paying for top earner college graduate degrees

Niobokupletskite ​tax break for the rich is a disinfection for the rip of businesses that surround us

Adrana West ​VOTE THE RIGHT WAY FOR AMERICA: TRUMP 2020

john doe ​ugh...

ascii ​Has anyone mentioned Israel yet?

AA14/MoshDuck ​Amy Tyler: Then why are you here?

Friendly Tourist ​🌚 PAGAN 🌛

IR_Dankenstein ​Word of the day is: Entitlement

Rod Bender ​"healthcare" should not be confused with "health insurance" DUMBOCRATS

Edward Wallace ​No one should be taxed by Government. Marianne Williamson 2020

grabitz ​slow mode

Bill Bush ​n

Star Dust ​why did you let Bush and Obama have all that money ?

Annika_green ​Stop taking too many meds and eat healthy. Again, PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY

No Regrets ​vote Trump 2020 President Trump 20/20 all the way

Happy Voice ​It's fiscally responsible to raise taxes on everyone, not just the rich, but middle class as well, before we even talk about changing healthcare or education.

Greig Ballantine ​oh my omar

BayouSef1 ​I don't know what he is talking about. It didn't cost me that much for a 12 year old.

Drill Bit ​Mushroom Williamson, Throw back from Woodstock

Steve Landy ​Trump 2020 ok

torrok 01 ​Trump has done nothing for you. Google Andrew Yang

AnabelleLee100 ​CAPS ARE ONLY WAY TO FIX HEALTHCARE COSTS

Joey Big Things Poppin ​Talk deficit yet their spending more than they can print

andrew richardson ​National debt goes up 100 million per hour 24/7

GDPops ​DISGUSTING DEMOCRATS - BOHICA

Spiny Norman ​taxation is theft, crime does not pay

DRUNKEN RAMBLE ​We're all gonna get a Skyscraper on 5th Ave one day. It's gonna be Huge!!!!......lololol

David Hensley ​so who is this guy lobbying for big pharma?

Uganda Knuckles Christ ​Omar antifa leader?

Dawn Gray ​Joe Biden SAID it last night. GOV'T has failed us 40yrs. Joe has BEEN THERE 49 THERE LIES THE PROBLEM. #TermLimits #ForthepeopleBythePeople

Danny Hemphill ​torrok01. your delusional. never gonna happen. IT'S called communism

DFG ​Corey Booker is the whitest person running for president

junior ​Andrew Yang 2020

KritterKracker ​The Superiority of the Republics freedom TRUMPS the inferiority of Congress

Keonte ​Andrew Yang 2020

awildbill rightous ​We clearly need Master Jedi Trump another 4 years ,💯

HK ​Torrok 01 come on man don't be Rude

abc def ​soros antifa and dem leader,fact

Mo Hamhead ​How come the Democrats aren't talking about Mueller any more? It's like he never existed

360Nomad ​I AM THE SENATE

Ganesh Jayatpal ​🚩🚩🚩

American Patriot 1776 ​Andrew Yang 2020 I agree Keonte

Happy Voice ​Taxes are used to support a government that provides necessary public services, such as a police force, public education, and public infrastructure, "taxation is theft" is simply idiotic.

Roger Clinton ​F Dems

Drill Bit ​Spiny Norman​ It pays for these people. They all rich.

SAND BLAST ​DEMOCRATS WERE IS MULLER ?

Jenny Ward ​I I bet Nancy Pelosi cart and baby roaches and lice flee from her arse.

Jim Brauer ​YANG 2020 / FREEDOM DIVIDEND / M4A / Humanity First / Abundance Mindset / $1,000 per mo per adult / Solution to POVERTY = CASH in the hands of Parents and Teachers !!! YANG = YES !!! TRICKLE UP

Annika_green ​@American Patriot 1776?Yang?! You want the taxation called VALUE ADDED TAX???

no halo ​President Trump should read that deal again because democrats and republicans agree to it,there has to be a catch,and you can't trust crooked career politicians!

Why are you so Angry? ​No more alms.

L Yachty ​Majority vote TRUMP obviously

OurSavageGaming ​MAGA 2020 🦅🦅🦅

JESUS CHRIST ​OLD FOLKS WANTING MORE CONTROL PRETTY SOON WE WILL BE WALKING LIKE SOLDIERS

Alan Johnson ​All of them are thieves! If they are talking they are Lying! Drain the swamp!

AnabelleLee100 ​Universal Health Exploitation does not fix Costs. Caps on Medical Charges ONLY Way to Fix Healthcare.

Joey Big Things Poppin ​So Taxation on the American people is a crime

Nothing ​democrats hate all human rights. they are anti free speech, privacy, self defence, due process. I cant think of 1 human right democrats support

Danny Hemphill ​yang is a con man commie

Borng Jak ​ខ្ញុំ

KritterKracker ​Freedom from Congress' Bad Debt

Dawn Gray ​MY Indep VOTE goes to TRUMP2020 #IndependentsForTrump

David Hensley ​and the police force is a arm of corporate America that listens to those who make the laws they are the arm that inforces them

Fake News ​DEBT CEILING MATTERS. PASSING IT IS A GOOD THING

abc def ​deport the whole yang family,enemies of the state

Kodiak ​suddenly Durbin cares about the troops.

_______________________________________________________

OPINION:  Great, great news to hear.  The Senate is doing an outstanding job.  

Lets give them applaus👏

[junker-town]

14 times Stephen A. Smith told us to ‘stay off the weed,’ rated

A thorough review of what is a public service announcement, solemn plea, and signature catchphrase rolled into one.

The great ones have their catchphrases. I’d posit that the most noteworthy one in the sports world currently belongs to Stephen A. Smith.

Mike Breen has “BANG,” Marv Albert has “YES.” Mark Jackson has “mama, there goes that man.” Andres Cantor has the “GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAL,” Bill Raftery has “ONIONS” and Chris Berman has “back, back, back, back, back, back, back.” They all pale in comparison to Smith’s signature phrase:

Stay off the weed.

If there is a Mount Rushmore of sports phrases, this one must be on it (click there if a video’s not showing up for you below, or throughout this post).

Smith has transformed into one of the more entertaining characters in sports media. If you try to take him terribly seriously, it’s just gonna make your head hurt, so don’t do that. If you view him purely as an entertainer, you’re gonna have way more fun, and you’ll start to appreciate the art of the delivery.

It’s always during a rant about athletes using Marijuana the message is clear. but there are a couple core tenets of the delivery to consider.

Think of the phrase as a theatrical production with three acts.

Keep track of these acts, because they’re important to the ratings for each production.

Act 1: The initial element is the setup and how he hits the “off.” Phonetically, with his native New York accent, it’s at his best when it sounds like “AWF.” By itself, it’s just a short word. But in the full context, as the foundation for the rest of the performance, its value cannot be understated.

Act 2: As you’ll see, as a true wordsmith, the phonetic gymnastics of the word “weed” come in two distinct sections. The crescendo, the “wee-” portion of the word takes us on a certain journey.

That brings us to ...

Act 3: Then the “d” or phonetically “duh” as a dismount to the turn of phrase.

Like a snowflake, all of Smith’s performances of this phrase are different. For posterity, I’ve taken as many utterances of the phrase as can be found on the internet (collected in great compilations by YouTubers that can be found by clicking on those links) and decided to score each instance out of five.

All verdicts are final and unimpeachable.

Nov. 28, 2018: 5.0 stars

This is truly the standard by which all others are judged. At a length of 8.57 seconds, the full “weed”: is the longest in the group. Act 2 in itself has multiple parts as Smith takes his voice to one key before dropping it to a lower register. You just can’t coach this.

And the finish here. Just **chef’s kiss**.

Nov. 28, 2018: 4.2

It starts about 40 seconds in.

Act 3 here is what I really want to hit on. It’s a guttural “-duh,” a truly impressive finish to make up for the fact that Act 2 was good but not great.

Some outtakes for y'all pic.twitter.com/0ueb2yTqAY

— Stephen A Smith (@stephenasmith) March 7, 2019

Feb. 6, 2014: 2.5

There’s little in the way of a dismount here, but the hand gestures in play do show what you can do to spruce things up to save the performance. It’s not just about the vocal registers. The window dressing can play a part as well.

Nevertheless, a disappointing Act 3 and no Act 1 leave this one incomplete as best.

May 12, 2014: 4.0

Like the one at the very top of this post, I think this is the most complete performance. It’s not the best or the most memorable but it is solid. The cadence measured, and no part stand out above the others.

This is consistency of delivery. It’s a 20 and 10 performance.

March 4, 2019: 1.5

I’m just disappointed with this one. The full voice crack ruins Act 2. What I will give some credit for is the intent inherent in Act 2. He’s trying to go to a certain place with it, but he misses the mark. I can’t in all good faith reward that.

Today's @HIGHNOONonESPN cold open, feat. @stephenasmith: pic.twitter.com/w8UBZXTqYF

— Pablo S. Torre (@PabloTorre) March 4, 2019

August 22, 2014: 1.0

This one isn’t particularly noteworthy in its own right, I just think it’s funny that he’s delivering a normal sentence and literally stops himself to hit the weed (not literally of course).

August 21, 2014: 4.8

The flair put in here with the damn. Like a gourmet chef adding just the right amount of seasoning to a masterful dish. The head movement adds a certain bit of panache too.

Bravo.

July 7, 2014: 4.5

Lest you think the man is a one-trick pony, he throws a curveball here to keep you on your toes with a “stay on the weed.” The bellicose low register he goes to with the “weed” cannot be ignored either.

March 26, 2015: 3.0

While the full delivery’s a little brief for my tastes, I do respect the head fake here to sell as well but I have seen better in that department.

July 7, 2014: 3.7

The hold of the note and the look to camera as he’s hitting Act 2 elevate it above replacement level. The man is a true professional of his craft. Even when he’s not at his best, he’ll at least give you something.

May 12, 2014: 3.7

Measured, concise, and on beat. I’ll consider those factors while being disappointed there is little in the way of an Act 3.

Date unknown: 3.8

I must dock points for a lack of an Act 1 while being quite impressed with both 2 and 3. There’s a different cadence and it’s less mid-rant than usual. It’s what holds this back from being great.

In summation.

We are all Max Kellerman here, as Smith gives us two for price of one in an extended rant. We are just witnesses to true greatness incarnate, making sure we’re clear on where Smith stands on THE WEEEEEEDUH.

[survivorinternational]

Episode 3 - "I wish you were BORN in 1920 so you wouldn't be in this org" - Emily

I was close to getting an idol without searching more than twice. Michael told me he had been gathering info and narrowed down to three locations, I had already searched one so thats two. Tyler was going to search one, micheal the other. So i thought: if i beat one of them to an idol search i will have it without then knowing. But idol was gone, rip. At least I have an alliance now, i like tyler idk about michael though. Anyone who can gather that much idol info must be shady to some degree. 

I am pretty good at Semantris but we are not winning this challenge.

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Oh yeah I guess maybe I shouldn't try too hard to not be a challenge target at merge. I guess I'll try to get the promised 6k ; my top 5 scores are 6k - 9k for comparison so it might not be the easiest thing. 

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So far Vilma, Richmond (Clash) and Ginger have said they will attend the watch-together. Hopefully we have a good time. 

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Day 5: God that music video is hilarious... basic... but funny Immunity win! YES! Still undefeated as a tribe. Continue to build social relations. Worked out most places that have been searched... Maybe i should do a spread sheet. Tomorrow Me and Tyler will search the last few places and hopefully find the idol. Day 6: GG Ruthie. Reward challenge, Word association, ok. Idol search has produced nothing... This is concerning... Someone must have it by now but no-one is saying. My guess is that its Stephen. Dean is more distant, this is also concerning. Dean is sitting out this challenge. Approached Tyler and Stephen about an alliance, Its going ahead, invited Jacob to be a 4th. If all goes to plan, I should know where all votes are going atm, It seems that most players trust me the most and are willing to work with me, but this is a double edge sword. Talk of a swap is happening... god i hope not yet.

So Laelaps comes up and tells me that there's an alliance of 4 forming with me not inside - Tyler, Stephen, Jacob and himself. Yes it does give me some comfort that he's told me and that we're still sticking together, but I don't like being possibly on the outside 4 to 2. I'm just trusting in my alliance of Jacob and Laelaps that even if they're playing both sides they'd rather take me, and I'm trying to appear less threatening to save myself here.

I hate to sound like that brawn comp beast girl but my tribe is full of inbreds and incapable of doing anything well. first of all, our music video was SHIT because only me and patrick actually tried and contributed something worth anything. second, this flash game is literally so easy..... and they're all like uWu I can't do it :/ like are y'all dumb dumb STUPID dumb? like what's up man? I've been doing this for like an hour at most and I've been getting 4400+ consistently and Patrick goes "my high score is 1920" bitch WHAT I wish you were BORN in 1920 so you wouldn't be in this org that was mean I'm kidding lol but im not I hate this tribe they're all so BORING I need some different timezones in my life. someone put vilma on my tribe. I don't know her and post season I really hope she doesn't think these confessionals are creepy. vilma I want to be your best friend everyone on my tribe sucks ): also last vote (sorry I didn't make a confession about it early) was okay - Ruthie wanted to go so we voted her out. ): rip her I love her so much. I was really looking forward to playing with her. but the good thing was it was easy and simple. if we go to tribal again idk if it'd be as simple lol. also im so bad at talking to these people???? they're so bland!!! maybe others are talking but im certainly not getting anywhere socially except with randy occasionally. I'd want to work with randy or Patrick. im not the biggest fan of liana or Daniel so if we went to tribal again that's who id want to go. I think I could make it happen too. maybe? who knows maybe they have it out for me fjdlkasjflas uhhhh okay bye bye

if the 24 hour challenge is word race i will flip 

I love European Michael, he is the best European. 

During the word making immunity challenge the Europeans were up at 4am kicking our butts and Tyler who isnt participating starts talking about a European girl on their tribe that seems to be good at everything so I go to check and I think it's Vilma and want to confirm with him. Then the next word we had to make was coincidentally V5, so guess what I wrote xD 

I think I'm coming off bossy in my tribe. Which I don't want to seem. But everything has got to be perfect and in order so there are no mistakes. We must win. 

You know what? im going to bed. If we lose the challenge so be it, itll be healthy to vote someone out. I am not slugging away through a 24hr challenge against a beast. I’m just not. And if Veni whats to make himself known as a challenge beast, he can do that, I’ll just be gunning for him come merge/swap. I know other people might do the same. But, you know, good for him.

So the w9 game is going on and my tribe has 3 and the others have 20 so it’s like for sure that we’re going to tribal tomorrow. And I have professed my love for randy and he returned it and I like Emily and we’re talking about our idol searches, so that’s 3 of 5 already. My tribe is just like a very quiet tribe nobody talks besides Emily. When I saw how good the other tribes music videos were I got very concerned about their amount of communication compared to ours. Idk who I want to vote out I think I like David a little more but I’ll see what the other two think. 

I am literally so happy I've got such devoted comp beasts like Vilma and Veni in my tribe ! And we're also close allies ;) It's cool, I don't need to slay comps to win this... I just need my social skills with me and they can continue to write words :) 

Patrick keeps calling Daniel David and if that doesn't tell you enough about my tribe idk what does. but who does it say more about? Patrick or Daniel? honestly who cares. Patrick, Randy, and I kind of banded together like "we're the only active ones lol let's vote together" so I think it's gonna be Daniel! sorry but the dude does NOT speak. and I know this is his first org over here and we're super boring... I feel bad. but yeah he's also boring! and he's sort of good at comps but not really dude. so I think it's gonna be him. after this tribal, im pretty sure that we are tribe swapping. yay final 14! I don't mind going to tribal honestly. I feel safe because I'm slightly more active than some of the other people. like it's sad to say im the most active member of my tribe but im constantly out with my friends or at work or neglecting my responsibilities. oopsie! yeah so im gonna hope and pray no one is planning a blindside on me but like if they were they'd be fucking stupid also there's no god damn way they're pulling something they don't care enough? like genuinely this tribe is so quiet. it's not that they're not talking to me. it's that they are not here. that makes the pre-merge easy for me because I can control what happens on my tribe for the time being... because it's easy? and everyone kind of thinks of me as a leader I think? because I TRY. that's IT. anyway lol yeah my plan is to vote out Daniel. and then swap onto a tribe with Vilma pls 

Our tribe results: *posted early in the afternoon that we lost* Tribe: *doesnt talk to me* Me, a few hours later: *messages everyone trying to start a conversation and no one responds for a while* Emily: *responds once and goes offline * Pat: *responds once* Emily: *gets back online and I see both her and Pat's green circles but neither has responded to me* Me: "are you bitches conspiring against me?" Whatever I will probably have to play my idol and I am thinking about playing it against pat or Emily.  Daniel is just new so that's a good excuse for him. 

If it wasn't a double tribal we'd all still be here but unfortunately we have to go to tribal tonight. Tonight for me could go very simply, keep my alliance of Michael and Jacob happy by voting out Dean who no one seems to have connections with, but I am getting a bit paranoid because besides Tyler, knowing seems to be talking to me or continuing my conversations which to me is a telltale sign that you're not included. The good thing is that I do have an idol and if I need to play it I will because better safe than sorry. 

All right, so we’ve got alliances out the wazoo rn. Along with a heavy handed dash of loose lips. So tyler tells me that sluggy made an alliance with everyone but me and dean, then sluggy tells me he had a super early alliance with michael and jacob. All this tells me that Micheal especially is playing the middle, being in two alliances with him already myself. It also tells me that sluggy cannot be trusted with info. But sureeee ill be in a 2man alliance with you sluggy -_- Right now I dont trust anyone, even tyler, but ill keep this info to myself, if sluggys playing me this might be a test to see if i tell tyler or anyone else. I just need to make sure I lay low and keep the target off my back. Fingers crossed I don’t get blindsided, but at least I know I am in no way in control of this tribe, keeps me on my toes. 

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So i think ive settled things enough to feel safe, i think everyones voting dean, deans voting jacob. The only wildcard is jacob who wants to split, but doesnt know who. Tbh if he does i dont want him to tell me who it is, ill only feel guilty if he does. As long as it aint me right? 

I guess to summarise the word race because I doubt I did confessionals during that. - Michael the helper was really cool and I really enjoyed our banter in tribe chat hopefully we cross paths again. We did add eachother on Snachat. - Me and Vilma once again were the most dedicated scoring 34/35 for our tribe together. She is absolutely my ride or die partner in this and I will do anything to get one of us to win the thing. - Survivor Africa watch was good, we watched the first 3 episodes though it was just me and Vilma (see the trend?). Sadly apparently that will become illegal if we swap and are not on the same tribe which is pretty sad. - Swap is incoming, everyone knows that. Question is, will it be entirely random? If so, I flipped a coin to test my luck and it failed me. My predictions have been on point this season so moral of the story: this swap won't work well for me. - ALSO I CALLED THAT IT'S WORD RACE I HATE YOU ALL BECAUSE I AM TOO DEDICATED FOR MY OWN GOOD GODDAMNIT peace out homedogs 

After that intense tribal council I am shaking so much, I did get to talk to Stephen and Tyler a bit alone afterwards in the call so it was nice to be able to get a feel for their true feelings without the disguise of text. At this point if Dean didn't have that idol, either Michael/Stephen have it, or it hasn't been found yet. The good news is that with it being final 14 i can expect a tribe swap into 2 tribes of 7, and that gives a lot of room for bonding, I'll continue to do what I've been doing with the friendliness and hopefully I'm not just swapped alone. I can always try to weasel my way into the cracks of a team if I am, but I'm not quite ready to play the victim card, I still have a long stretch of game left in me before I do that. 

Well what's cooking is that I really really think it's gonna be me this vote lol, no one has talked to me and well, yeha 

2 immunity wins in a row hell yeah! Ngl, I wasn't SUPER worried about this one because if we lost, I think it was almost certain that Ginger would go. Ginger didn't submit in the last immunity and barely helped in this one and has barely spoken to any of us. Clash and I had a call the other day which was good and gave us an opportunity to discuss a bit of game which was good. We talked about who we liked/disliked and I found out that he knows Ginger but doesn't like him. It's almost certain that next round is a tribe swap and I'm praying I get put with Clash. Right now, my ranking of who I'd want to go forward with is probably : Clash>Vilma>Veni>Ginger 

Oh bless at us winning but at the same time I don’t trust ginger so idk if that’s the best but let’s hope for the best and hope I am in a tribe with Vilma and randy next tribe swap hehe 

Where is this idol?? No one claims to have found it and I sure haven't either. Could use a clue right now. Too bad my tribe mates didn't agree, since THREE of them STRIKED at the reward challenge. I literally burst into laughter when I saw that. My I C O N I C fail of a tribe. Veni and I are the only ones who truly care about challenges. Well Allan cares a bit as well, but he also seems to have a life, so, I'm happy for him, although jealous! But I bet we would've lost every single pre merge challenge if Veni and I weren't overly enthusiastic about them. I just hate tribal, okay? Plus I guess I admit I'm somewhat competitive, because I don't think I could handle just throwing a challenge without trying at all. That would feel simply wrong. Veni and I went all out in the immunity challenge too, we napped in shifts and made sure one of us was around throughout the entire challenge so we had the possibility to score a point at all times. Plus we made a huge ass google sheet so we could just copy and paste answers whenever a new letter got posted. The first 15-17 hours or so I thought the Aussie tribe was for sure going to beat us (they were soooooo fast, but so was Veni thank god), but I guess they got sleepy by the end and we won!!!! YAYYYYY NO TRIBAL Veni almost posted a gif of himself as a chicken to the challenge chat I would've died if we got a warning for that He meant to post it on tribe chat https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/410716559632367616/599331778934603786/mmm_veni_2.gif I don't know who I'd vote if we went to tribal that's why I really would like to avoid it Plus I'm scared Veni and I's activity is pissing people off Don't wanna go home yet I'm having fun Ugh fuck I'm losing focus LOOK AT THAT FOUR AUSSIES GOING AGAINST ONE LITTLE ME HELP Ugh Veni will be busy in about 30 mins and then I'm gonna be in big trouble At least he let me shower I feel like a human again But it'll be tough If I was normal I'd just chill but I don't have it in me I don't know how to chill I love winning too much I gotta get that bag It's a thug life It's a thug life WE WON CHALLENGE WE GOT A BIG LEAD THEY CANT CATCH UP FUCK YEEE I CAN SLEEP EARLIER I am just glad we don't have to vote anyone out Would've sucked I feel like these past 24 hours brought closer together So I would've hated it if someone had to leave (Especially if it was me) But F14!! WOOP We're surely going to swap after the double tribal and I'm excited but scared!!! Excited because I'm ready to meet some new faces even though I've grown a liking to my flop tribe, and scared because I feel after the last challenge it's pretty apparent Veni and I were the more active members of our tribe and we could get targeted for that. My plan is to try to lay a bit low at swap, but still make sure I get to know everyone one on one to make solid new connections. I really hope I don't get swapfucked, hope to remain in the same tribe with as many og Faatasi as possible. Let's go!

Damn work keeping me to busy to do confessionals. Reward Challenge: This appears easier as we go on. Quite enjoy this. Aim for over 5000. Got 7200 in one of my first tries... Aim is 10,000 Settled for 8200, sick of looking at my screen. Some of these word associations don't make sense. Who doesn't associate Video games with words like Play or fun... REWARD CHALLENGE WIN! AWWW YER!!! Comfort Items get! And in comfort items... A Vote Blocker!!! BOO YAH!!! Immunity Challenge: I called this 12 hours before the challenge began. I am a legend. Seems that most people are busy this weekend. I will do what I can but i will be busy for a good 6 hours of it as well Veni and Vilma are thorns in my side with this, they just type so quick VENI DOESNT SLEEP WTF!!! I cant keep up, I tried my hardest but cant keep going at 3am. We lost :( Tribe life: Current Alliances: The UHC Alliance, The Idol Hunters Alliance. Sluggy has suggested an Alliance between Tyler, Jacob, himself and me which I agree to. Vote is very straight forward, We are all voting Dean as he isn't very active unfortunately. I wanted to try and keep him around but I think I was the only one chatting to him. If Dean has an Idol then it will be Jacob going, which is also fine with me as I think Jacob will be a hindrance later in the game Dean is voted out 5-1 The idea of a swap is brought up, which we all agree is likely to happen. In the UHC chat, Sluggy brings up the point that Veni could spill the beans about knowing each other out of this survivor. Its a good point and I really didnt want to but I told my Idol Hunter Alliance about the fact I knew Jacob, Sluggy and Veni outside of the game but I play each survivor without using my relationships from outside the game effect it.

RIGHT so here we go again u crack heads. Hate u all, this is for round 3 btw so dont get it TWISTED, sorry I made a VIDEO confessional and forgot to post it OOPSIES. Anywho, like the who’s from whovillie here we are partying minding our own business, well me at least because while I went out clubbing everyone else had to do the challenge. Sorry about it. They all love me anyway so ALL good in the HOOD. Here we are thriving Michael is absolutely carrying the team. So while the challenge was popping off Sluggy approached me asking if I was in any alliance, I high key avoided the question and just said who im trying to trust, and HIGH KEY dropped hints that dean wasn’t one of those people. He start saying if we should make an alliance chat, I was elated by the idea and smiles were HAD. The alliance included Myself, Sluggy, Michael and Jacob which is everyone expect Dean and Stephan. This is the exact same as the other alliance chat but without Stephan and Sluggy in his place! I like Stephan tho, so I went and dibba dobbed on sludgy real quick, like a speed demon u could say. Sluggy was out here trying to make ME make the alliance chat, like no thank u that can be UR job I need to tell people I was DRAGGED into it so I CANT make it SORRY. Anywho he made it. So we accidentally LOST the challenge, and much to my SURPRISE due to my lovely CONNECTIONS with these lovely people! I wasn’t targeted at all even tho I sat out and went clubbing. Yee haw, I exclaimed out of excitement. My target is Dean going into this tribal. A.) he seemed really arrogant and annoying during the music video round. b.) his video submission gave me NIGHTMARES now I can’t even hug my pillow without feeling UNSAFE and C.) we dont talk. So ooop here come the kiddies lining up in formation asking what we should do for the vote. Ooo I want to vote Dean but I simply never say it because im not a GOOSE well I try not to be a GOOSE. I say how I feel good with … but never include dean, I then wait for them to say anything negative about dean and oops I agree real quick and keep the convo focused on dean. People were talking in a alliance chats but I was highkey ignoring them because I COULDNT BE BOTHERED I talked to everyone in pm’s tho, love that for me. So Michael is over here being everyones friend so I threw him just a BIT under the bus for a later date. Like I built the ramp and the final destination is under the bus but we aint gonna push him yet. ANYWAY Dean went home yay he will be missed just not by me. 

[westsidevideo]

How Do You Solve A Problem Like An Oscar?

The 89th Academy Awards are happening this month, and once again, we look to the group behind each Oscar nomination and win to find for us the year's best films from around the world. Unfortunately, that prestigious voting body does not always manage to find the best of the best... and when that happens, we call it like it is: a snub. Here are some of the most egregious snubs: [Look for Ashlyn’s ratings in the brackets, as usual.] Doubt (2008, PG-13) - This tale of Catholic school politics and potential impropriety is brilliant in its plotting and tone. This is the first time Viola Davis broke hearts across the continent in a film, too, and she deserved that Best Supporting Actress trophy. [I'm guessing kids and young teens will have very little interest in this film. A certain level of maturity is required for enjoyment.] 4 Months, 3 Weeks, And 2 Days (2007, Unrated) - In 1980s Romania, where birth control is forbidden and terminating a pregnancy is punishable by death, a woman clandestinely helps her friend arrange an illegal abortion. It failed to get a Best Foreign Language Film nomination, which is just...it's a mess, y'all. [This movie is pretty depressing, and involves some pretty heavy matters. I'm going to say anyone under 16 should just watch Juno instead.] City Of God (2002, R) - The Tender Trio in Rio de Janeiro grows up before our eyes, with each boy taking a different path over the span of twenty years. This gripping, brutal coming of age film didn't win any categories, and somehow wasn't nominated at all for Best Foreign Language Film. How in the world? [This is a grown-ups movie.] Do The Right Thing (1989, R) - This landmark Spike Lee picture brings us the hottest day during some real tense times in Brooklyn's Bed-Stuy neighborhood. Spike Lee has never won an Academy Award, though he was given an honorary award in 2015. The only actor nominated for an Oscar for their work on this extraordinary film was Danny Aiello. [Older teens on this one. There a LOT going on in this one, and it will just be too much for kids.] His Girl Friday (1940, Unrated) - What a whirlwind this one is! Howard Hawks pushed the pace by having his hugely talented cast add glib extras and talk over each others. This popular, enduring film didn't manage a single nomination. Boo. [This one's pretty family friendly. Innuendo will go over the littles' heads.] The Maltese Falcon (1941, Unrated) - John Huston, an absolute film titan, here directs Humphrey Bogart in a spiny noir involving a detective, a dame, various criminals, and a bird statuette. The film got a few nominations, but lost out to How Green Was My Valley and the lesser known Here Comes Mr Jordan. [Little kids probably won't get any of the plot, but it's otherwise reasonably family friendly. There's smoking, drinking, and some 40s violence.] The Shining (1980, R) - This Stephen King adaptation has long been the source of tween nightmares and everyone being scared of Jack Nicholson's face, yet it garnered not one Oscar nod. Horror is one of those genres that simply isn't treated well by major awards, maybe to the detriment of all filmmaking. [I saw this first when I was about 7 years old. I can't watch Lakers games because Nicholson might be there. Maybe start with 12 year olds you really wanna spook.] The Shawshank Redemption (1994, R) - A man is wrongfully imprisoned at the Shawshank facility and chooses to deal with his new hardships by making friends and performing small kindnesses. What a picture! Unfortunately, this was in the running the same year as Forrest Gump, and somebody didn't know how to share. [This is a pretty rough one, even for teens. With trigger warnings for rape and prison guard beatings, I'd still say 17 and up.] Pulp Fiction (1994, R) - How in tarnation did Pulp Fiction, one of the most popular films on the planet, not win a single Oscar? Most especially unfair is Samuel L Jackson not winning Best Supporting Actor. Again- Forrest Gump doesn't share. [Most teens will probably be fine. This is a Quentin Tarantino film, so, you know...there's gonna be a lot of blood and language.] My Own Private Idaho (1991, R) - River Phoenix and Keanu Reeves are a couple of young hustlers, serving whatever clients come their way in Portland while going through the self-discoveries of coming of age. So many feels, helped by a gorgeous score. This one did splendidly at the Independent Spirit Awards, but got no Oscar nods. [This is pretty grown up material. Mature older teens and up.] A League Of Their Own (1992, PG) - This here is a fictionalized account of a team from the Women's Baseball League, featuring fun, heartfelt performances from Geena Davis, Lori Petty, Tom Hanks, Rosie O'Donnell, Madonna, and more. It's got everything a movie should have, and yet, the Academy did not agree. Well, they're wrong. [If you don't like this movie, you might be dead inside. All ages okay.] American Me (1992, R) - Edward James Olmos plays a Chicano gangster who goes directly from reform school to prison and emerges, eighteen years later, in a new world- one where all the violence in his life no longer makes sense. It's beautiful and visceral and it got no Oscar nods, which is just a shame. [This is rough. There's a ton of realistic physical and sexual violence. Grown ups only.] Fruitvale Station (2013, R) - This film is a day-in-the-life storytelling master class. The fact that it got no nominations proves that politics were interfering in art matters. It's only supposed to go the other way. [Older teens should be fine. Oscar Grant was killed while handcuffed by a BART cop in front of a full passenger train. This documents his last 24 hours.] The Kid Stays In The Picture (2002, R) - This documentary mirrors the autobiography of Robert Evans, legendary producer at Paramount and the first actor to ever run a film studio. This got nominations or wins at a huge amount of festivals and ceremonies, but zero Oscar nods. Sounds like hurt feelings, tbh. [There is quite a bit of language, but other than that it should probably be PG-13.] Children Of Men (2006, R) - This is one of the best science fiction movies of the century so far. In the near-ish future, women around the world have become infertile, no children have been born for nearly 20 years, and yet, miraculously, one woman becomes pregnant. In this world where humanity is actively dying, a former activist agrees to transport the potential mother of the future to a safe haven. This garnered nominations in adapted screenplay, cinematography, and editing, but won no awards. [This is a hard movie to watch, but I think teens can see the violence for what it is- indicative of the lengths to which any of us might go to survive.] In Bruges (2008, R) - After a job gone wrong, two hitmen are sent to cool off and await further instruction from their boss in Belgium, which is the end of the world for the younger man and a sweet refuge for the older, wiser partner. The smaller McDonagh brother directing Brendan Gleeson, Colin Farrell, and an excellent supporting cast makes for wacky movie magic, but the film was nominated for just the screenplay award, and didn't win. [There is a ton of language and strong, visceral violence. 16+.] Gran Torino (2008, R) - A curmudgeonly, racist Korean War veteran decides to reform his young Hmong neighbor when the kid tries to swipe the old man's Gran Torino. Against his will, he ends up connecting with the family and working to protect them from negative outside influences. Since when does a movie directed by and starring Clint Eastwood get no big nods? [There is a LOT of language, and quite a bit of violence. 16+.] Sin Nombre (2009, R) - A Hunduran young woman is traveling through Mexico on train tops with the ultimate goal of successfully crossing the border and gaining access to the US. The adventure could cost her her life. Is it worth it? We think the movie is, although it didn't secure even a Best Foreign Language Film nod. [This one is rough. There is a lot of realistic violence, including sexual violence, and some language. I'll say 16+, if they can handle brutality.] The Intouchables (2011, R) - A French millionaire becomes a quadriplegic in a paragliding accident and hires the uncouth African young man who just wants a signature on his unemployment paperwork. The challenge changes both of their lives and outlooks... even though it didn't sway the Academy into a single nomination. [This is a PG-13 movie plus f-words. Tweens and up should be fine.] Let The Right One In (2008, R) - This is a stark and startlingly human monster story, and should be viewed in its original language if at all possible. This is also one of the few movies that is hands down better than the book on which it is based! Where are the Oscars for directing, cinematography, adapted screenplay, and/or foreign language film? [This one is probably technically fine for tweens and up. Not a lot happens on screen, although there is some blood.] The Book Of Eli (2010, R) - In a post-apocalyptic world, one man traverses the country to protect a book he believes will save the remaining population. Denzel Washington should have a museum of Academy Awards with his name on them by now, honestly. [There is violence, that's for sure, but if you know it's coming I'd call this a 14+ movie.] Calvary (2014, R) - The elder McDonagh brother and Brendan Gleeson take another film outing together in this dry-witted, moodily shot story of a priest who has been threatened with death in the confession booth. [This is on the level of In Bruges; older teens will probably be okay with the violence, although they may not understand all the dialogue without the subtitles on.] Far From The Madding Crowd (2015, PG-13) - This is a beautiful adaptation of Thomas Hardy's novel, wherein Victorian England's Bathsheba Everdene must choose a suitor, sure, but also run her life in a manner most women of the time could not have accomplished. How did this not win a costuming award? [Eh, it's pretty family-friendly, as far as period piece romances go. Hardy is perhaps my least favorite author, but I still really liked this adaptation, so it's worth it if any of his books are assigned in school, too.] Creed (2015, PG-13) - Ryan Coogler and Michael B Jordan reunite for this new addition to the Rocky franchise- and it's good enough to be a franchise in its own right. Somehow, with a Black writer/director, male lead, and female lead, the only Oscar was for Sylvester Stallone in his supporting role. [If watching an actual boxing match is okay for your kids, watching this movie is probably okay too.] Blow Out (1981, R) - Brian De Palma combines with pre-horrible John Travolta to bring us the story of a sound artist who gets caught up with evidence of a murder. Nowadays films that show Hollywood a piece of itself get major awards, so not sure how this got left out. [There's some language, quite a bit of realistic violence, and some scenes of a sexual nature. I see why it's R, although exceptions could be made.] All these are just off the top! What do you think are some snubs we missed?

#academyawards oscars bestpicture creed thebookofeli clinteastwood maltesefalcon bestforeignlanguagefilm snubs