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pinkstarryclouds · 10 months

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My husband, Austin Michael Rowsell, disparaging my gender during our marriage ceremony on Wednesday, January 18, 2023.

He also stole our marriage license, which I had to report to Magna, Utah PD (USA) as stolen, as well as to the the Salt Lake Marriage and Passports supervisor Allison Dodge and Mountain Vista United Methodist Church pastor Philip M. Rogers.

Austin Michael Rowsell (Ausedia) and his sister Faelisa Ranae Rowsell also tried to force me to violate the falsely-obtained but still legally-enforceable protective order.

I have neither met nor desire to meet Faelisa Rowsell, Haveign Lamb Rowsell, Adelbert Jack Rowsell (the adoptive father that beat my husband/Austin), Hannah Rowsell, or for sure Tristan Galvan, or even Zaiden Adelbert Zayn Rowsell, the four year old now maybe five year old child of Faelisa Ranae Rowsell and Tristan Caleb Galvan, since my husband told me the four year hits him, too. Btw, Zaiden's name is listed on Faelisa Ranae Rowsell's Instagram.

Austin Michael Rowsell falsely accused me of domestic violence on our marriage night, landing me in jail fo five days and with a permanent no-contact order, which will not bode well when applying to NASA'S aeronautics program and optometry school in the future.

This is the second time I've had a romantic partner have a problem with speaking for my gender. It ain't happening this time.

Please see the following links for evidence:

https://www.twitter.com/pnkstarrykisses for police reports and screenshots.

And please report my husband's GoFundMe, as it contains libelous statements regarding my character, in addition to the fact that I simply don't trust my husband to take the leftover funds and donate them but rather use them for diapers and gaming accessories. A small defamation case like this doesn't cost 55 thousand USD for an attorney. You can do these types of cases pro-se, tbh.

Also, apparent Epidemic Sound cancelled their contract with Ausedia long before I informed them of Austin's foolishness.

I also messaged individuals privately via FetLife when Austin aka TotingGames publicly posted a slanderous message in the group "Salt Lake Ageplayers", knowing I disliked the leader, -LittleLolly-, for allowing underaged members in her group. I run/own a group called Utah Young Kinksters and Ageplayers and ID EVERYONE before admitting them to ALL and ANY group activities.

The rest of that shit with Salt Lake Ageplayers was reported to the police.

I'll also be suing Faelisa Ranae Rowsell and Adelbert Jack Rowsell under Utah's "heart balm" (aka "homewrecker laws") as well as Faelisa Ranae Rowsell for witness intimidation and criminal harassment.

If you let a person run their mouth long enough, they'll incriminate themselves.

My husband falsely obtained a protective-order at my personal and my brand's (Peachtree, Rainy Diapers LLC, Strawberry Castle LLC) expense, falsely obtained free-low-cost representation with false domestic violence allegations that landed me in jail on our marriage night with a slew of other bullshit I'm not going to be quiet about.

He even used YouTube's Legal Department to contact me using third-party contact and whined to them via Twitter when they stopped communicating with them. I'm going to sue YOuTube as well for allowing Austin to make false copyright claims on my digital property.

Additionally, Epidemic Sound cancelled their partnership/contract with Ausedia. Either Stephen Setchell is going to tell me why ES did did so voluntarily, or ES will be supoenaed for the reasoning.

If my husband doesn't drop this lawsuit bullshit, I'm going to clean him out and rip the ground from under his feet, leaving to walk on his knees throughout life and eating out of garbage, like he has done me, until he commits suicide. Why is'nt his family giving him money? Even my own fucked up covert-narcissist mother gave me $300 dollars when i was dealing with fake Utah landlord Bernard Evans.

Fool.

Not that i wish that on him, but that's what white people do when they're in trouble. They kill themselves.

All of this because I held him Austin accountable for disparaging my gender twice in one day, one of those times in which you can see here in this video.

Also, you need a court order to remove statements and videos from Tumblr, so this was a calculated post. The next was a personal website.

In the words of Swoop, this isn't drama, this is dangerous.

Austin can drop the falsely-obtained protective order and this "defamation lawsuit" or I'm going to take everything in an annulment and unfortunately, leave my husband eating off the ground.

This is not something I desire to do.

If you are an attorney wish to represent me pro-bono or for a low cost and some publicity, I live in the state of Utah (USA), and can be contacted at [email protected]

I don't expect things for free, but will certainly appreciate the offer.

If Austin's attorney wishes to contact me in regards to dropping 1) divorce proceedings, 2) a stupid defamation lawsuit in which I'm going to sue everybody involved, and 3) pare me of having to speak about very personal matters in court, including my husband's ability to perform and Austin agrees to some things and gets himself some help instead of using the courts to FORCE him into it, then that can be discussed privately between Austin, myself, and a mediator if necessary (*I* will make that call), recorded electronically, Austin knows my legal email address. It will not be listed here, as it contains my real name.

That is all.

This matter will be kept private for Third District Court Presiding Judge Mark Kouris to view, as well the general public.

I have the right to protect my name and myself as well as my family.

I don't why Austin is pretending his family is so important now, when only six month ago, he was looking for a way to run away from them and detach from them forever, he told me himself in both text message and person.

~Peachtree<3

#colleenballinger #mirandasings #swoop #domesticviolece #falseallegations #peachtree #kpop #divorce #annulment #jail #abusesurvivor #mentalhealth #childabuse #childabusesurvivor #austism (Ausitn says he is autistic. We'll see. i don't believe that either. i also don't believe he isn't fucking his sister and told him so, directly to his face. Trauma bonding is one thing but a grown woman with a four year old and a long-time romantic partner and a married man have no business being so obsessed with one another like unless they're fucking which is NOT uncommon in thee types of situations. I often wonder if Zaiden is my husband's child and not homeboy's. I will be ordering a paternity test in court. It wouldn't surprise me if the test came back positive.)

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itsaaudraw · 2 years

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the riddler: oh, my last name isn’t nygma, that’s a typo. it’s actually lygma

batman: lygma?

the riddler:

#the riddler #edward nygma #edward nashton #the batman 2022 #batman #shitpost #stole this from my own horror twitter #and i know his name is nashton in the new movie but that’s also his canon true last name #meaning there’s still hope for edward lygma

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7ofheartspod · 2 years

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I don't think horror podcasts can or should have happy endings. The instant you have that assurance that things will be ok, it ceases to be horrifying. Let it end badly. Let it end unsatisfyingly. Let it end predictably. Let the audience watch it like a trainwreck they can't stop

#stole this from my own twitter #be afraid be very afraid etc #seven of hearts podcast #seven of hearts pod #horror podcast #the magnus archives #I'd tag other horror pods but I'm blanking

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du-buk · 4 years

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I swear if I see more posts like “oh rpg horror is a dead community nowadays” I’m gonna

#i stole this from my own twitter but its true #rpgmaker #rpg horror

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analoghorrorexplained · 2 years

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Dear Analog Horror community: you are killing your own fandom by sexualizing it

I am pretty sure many of you who have followed me when I started posting may have noticed my lack of posts as of recently. There are definingly more analog horror facts to be shared, theories to be discussed, and Easter eggs to find. But to be 100% honest I have been struggling to want to even post content for this community anymore. There is a plethora of reasons for this: general burnout, life shit, etc... but the biggest deterrent of me actually posting content and reviewing stuff is literally the fanbase itself.

A few days ago at the time of writing, Alex Kister posted a tweet:

From what I have seen he has been the only Analog Horror creator to actually address this issue; but within time I think more people will come out of the woodwork to talk about it as well.

There is a massive problem within the Analog horror community (more specifically in the Walten Files and Mandela Catalogue sub communities). And the funny part is this issue is perpetuated by literal minors. People who should not be engaging in sexual spaces anyway are literally perverting these series from what they are, horror storylines, into baseless smut.

I have stopped drawing fanart of Mandela Catalogue all together because of creepy/sexual messages I receive from other ‘fans’. Most of these messages objectify my drawings or they ask me to draw “CHARACTER x CHARACTER” porn. I even had to leave the official discord because literal minors (some probably in MIDDLE SCHOOL by the way they talked) would not stop talking about sex and what they would do to the characters. I can only imagine what type of harassment/DMs Alex gets regarding this issue since he is the creator of the series.

It has already been made clear that Alex does not like the creation of this type of content and many other fandom members have expressed discomfort that this is even happening. So with that said why is it still happening?

By doing this shit you are:

Forcing your sexual interests upon other people who do not want to engage in sexual topics and activities

Actively disrespect the creator’s boundaries by posting endless amounts of porn/beyond suggestive text posts

Creating a hostile environment for asexual people, other minors, and people who just do not want to talk about sex

Stripping meaning/suspense away from these series by boiling it down to ONLY porn

And if you are a minor doing this you are literally engaging in content you should not legally be viewing. And by engaging with other fandom members in this way (some who may even be adults) you literally run the risk of actual legal ramifications. Fuck, you may even get an entire fandom’s official shut down because of child saftey concerns. Because even if a space is made for adults and is generally populated by adults: if a minor gets in and makes it a place where minors are engaging in sexual activity the entire thing will be nuked anyway.

On top of that: this continued behavior will most likely result in many Analog Horror creators stopping their projects if the issues continue. I know many fanartists have already jumped ship. Why risk forcing your favorite series to stop making new episodes/content all together because you cannot control your own sexual urges. Plus I would like to add using “Rule 34″ as a defense here is utter bullshit. We are not dealing with a franchise, we are dealing with people making unsolicited porn of somebody’s passion project. They (being the creator of the series) has the right to tell people to stop drawing porn of their creations. And at that point we are crossing into the realm of actual sexual harassment.

This meme I blatantly stole from twitter (created by @HexKirari) puts it best.

Some of yall are literally willing to use your own horniness to justify harassing your favorite creators and objectify their work.

And the more you do that, the more people will leave the fandom (including creators) and it will get to the point where there will literally be nobody left but the sick freaks who get off to poorly drawn police sketches.

Stop it, touch some grass, and stop forcing your sexual desires down everybody’s throat.

#analog horror

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inkskinned · 4 years

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When the honey showed up, we all just took it inside. That was one of the things about it - it was always a little warm, always in the same simple jar and the nice plaid bow. Handmade-like. Most of us put it in our pantries or in the back of our cabinets, some put it in the fridge. we just thought to ourselves: gee, what a wonderful present.

I don’t know how long it took before we all had one. For a while, the most that would happen was two-minute feel-good op ed pieces in local newspapers. People would run little letters to the editor to find out the “culprit”. Sometimes there were faux-serious “investigations” when that parent freaked out about the possibility of drugs in honey. Most of the time, it ended quickly. After all, it was a nice gift from a neighbor, and it was yours. that was another thing. A house could be 122 people, and we’d all find our own jar on the doorstep, one at a time. we would know when it was ours and when it wasn’t, no matter how alike they looked. nobody ate it, at first. It was yours, and you wouldn’t eat it, and you couldn’t eat another person’s. it just wasn’t done. and the thing is - in that imaginary house, of 122 people? we’d all buy other honey. it was both there and took up space - but none of us thought of it as actually existing. we’d put down our storebought honey right next to it and think - why did i buy another? i’ve wanted to try this one for a while. and then the thought would simply be out of our head, because this is our third bag of baby carrots we have bought to let spoil again.

it was that one person who mentioned it on youtube. actually i think it was a vimeo “urban legends” series. some person with 6 followers who deleted like instantly. but then 6 people said something similar: everyone they knew had this one specific honey story. and then 12. and then all of a sudden we all woke up to “#honeyonthedoorstep” globally trending. we all posted our pictures of our honey and called each other liars and got into discourse fights with vegans and people without a sweet tooth. In 24 hours, it was running the media. 9-at-night serious news anchors leaned over to each other and said “now john, did you hear about this?” and despite their disbelief, they’d admit: i got the honey too. I think somewhere in march. maybe around the 5th. but i never ate it or thought anything of it. i just thought - what a nice gift.

By the end of the week, there were YouTube challenges and instagram memes and a netflix miniseries in the works. Lots of people tried to eat their honey, and most who “succeeded” were deemed a hoax - but truth be told? it’s not good tv to watch someone pick up honey and say “actually it’s not ready” or something similar and just decide to go do something else. i tried once, winedrunk and thinking i could be famous because it’s just honey. and i remember thinking that exact thing - it’s not ready. i realized i needed to go do dishes, this was stupid and kind of cringey.

and people freaked out, of course. outside of the jokes were parents who were asking if their children would get a jar one day, if this was a one-time thing. there were so many conspiracy theories the government finally had to say something (not that any of us were actually listening), there were massive hunts to find “the team of honey dispatchers”, there were plenty of false confessions, there were rallies to destroy the things. i don’t know if anyone actually did, because in the end? it was just a jar of honey, and it was yours, and it would be a shame to throw it at the floor just because the internet told you so. I moved three times that year - grad school, job, other better job. i always took mine with me. it wasn’t a real choice, it was just... like taking a plate that belonged to your grandmother, or carrying a song stuck in your head. it was just something that was going to come with, but it bore no special attention. and then back into the pantry it went.

two weeks later? we all just... moved on from talking about honey. it was in some memes, it was in BuzzFeed’s “top 5 weirdest stories (that are actually true)”, it was going to be the central plot of books and horror movies. but it wasn’t interesting, not really, anymore. it was like saying “all people need food”. it was just true, and not really changing. every consecutive conspiracy video got less likes, and by the end of the year, it was old enough to be a staple in bad stand-up comedy and in coming-of-age children’s shows.

nobody believed the first ones who ate it. the most traction that those posts got were from friends and family who barely remembered the whole fad. we all just figured it was a weird annual resurgence kind of thing.

but then people were definitely, absolutely, 100% eating their honey. i think i heard about one of my coworkers first. i didn’t know her; she was in another department. she told everyone it was very similar to “normal” honey. just a little tarter than she’d expected.

twitter was in an uproar. the honey was sweet to some. spicy to others. horrible, bitter, like a thousand stingers. it was perfect, it tasted like summer. most people said: it’s just honey, and absolutely regular.

those of us who weren’t ready were biting our fingernails for a while, going to our pantries, wondering - what the fuck do i mean it’s not ready? but it wasn’t ready.

like i said, it’s warm, always. But you just... know. one day you realize you really want honey on toast. or honey on tea, honey on a banana, just... honey. i remember opening it, but it didn’t feel like any more interesting than going to the cabinet for honey ever feels. i pour mine, usually, skipping a spoon because i’m usually too lazy. i was already in the middle of my meal before i realized - this is the honey. it’s not just a normal breakfast, it’s the breakfast, holy shit.

mine is just, you know. honey. it has a little hint of spice and sweet to it, which i actually quite like. it reminds me of this red pepper jelly my family used to get, and it makes me happy. but in the end? it’s honey. i don’t feel like i’m connected to a seventh realm. it’s good on oatmeal and bad in coffee no matter what some of you will tell me.

it’s just, you know. once you get your jar, and it’s ready, you have a little honey roughly every 24ish hours. it’s nothing absurd. it’s just honey, i mean - it’s like saying “you’re alive, so at some point, you should probably eat.” Most of us, it hasn’t really changed our schedules. it doesn’t seem to ever run out, which is good, because we’re always forgetting to check to see if we need more before we go shopping. for most of us? you don’t die if you miss a few days, even a few weeks, you don’t go crazy trying to get it back. sure, there’s weirdass cultists who worship it, but most of us just seem to think - it’s nice to have, and it’s okay to want this thing.

now, there’s some stuff out there, you know, about what it all “means”. and honestly, we all notice things. i’m not the only one who has seen that good people tend to think their honey tastes good and eat it normally. bad people tend to eat their honey frequently but hate every second of the eating. there are plenty who will snort and say “i’m a good person and i think it tastes like dirt” and plenty who will say “i’m a shit person and i think it tastes like the summer i finally kissed her”. and i don’t know, not the way i knew if it was ready, but it feels like a simple thing amidst all the messy. and it’s probably helpful that i think mine is, like most people’s, just a nice in-the-middle. i mean, the other day i heard it asked like a star sign - what’s your honey like?

there’s this one thing, though, you know. i choose to believe, because it might make me secretly happy. it’s like believing in nessie. i know realistically it’s probably just hearsay. but there’s this underground rumbling that, over time, the honey changes. just a little, every day, unnoticeable to most of us who go to work and do our best by others but still sometimes steal toilet paper. there’s these stories of people who made it rich by selling out their friends, who stole patents, who argue that others should charge for insulin - that they liked the honey, at first, but over time, it’s gone rotten. and similarly, every so often, there’s these stories of people who were normal “regular” honey people, who helped someone out of the bottom. who chose to be just a little bit better than they were the day before. who had moments of decisive kindness that changed them. they all say the same thing: since then, the honey has been amazing, and they work to keep it that way.

my grandmother and my mother were never surprised. they have this saying about bees and their secrets. my mother said to me: we have always had these tiny angels. they’re just giving us each a taste of the world we are making.

my grandmother later tells me, while watering the flowers, almost the exact same thing: they will haunt us when they go, because they keep books in their combs. and they see us giants, and no matter who we lie to? the world of bees will know.

#spilled ink #prose #short story #honey #i originally wrote this in my car while binge eating doritos happy mardi gras style #but then tumblr deleted it lmao bc i walked between 2 wifi connections #so if it sucks its bc i had to half-remember a good version

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let-me-luve-you · 3 years

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Winter Storm

Jared Padalecki x Reader

Summary: You play Cordell Walker’s daughter on the new show Walker. Jared takes you under his wing. What happens when a winter storm hits all of Texas.

Warnings: Mentions of a rough upbringing, Texas winter storm, power outage, water problems, some angst, scary weather, fluff, protective Jared, maybe a cuss word somewhere

A/N: As a Texan, this past week has been scary. I have been extremely blessed to not have the problems that a lot are. I was lucky and did not lose power and did not have any pipes burst. This idea came to me after seeing that Jared and Gen were helping others while dealing with their own problems at their house.

HERE ARE SOME LINKS TO HELP OUT IF YOU ARE ABLE TO.

KICK THE COLD - AUSTIN MUTUAL AID

GENESIS WOMEN’S SHELTER & SUPPORT

FEEDING TEXAS

LIST OF ORGANIZATIONS SEEKING DONATIONS IN DALLAS AREA

THE WAY HOME

You do not have to donate to any of these organizations, but if you feel the need to help, here are a few links. ^^^^ There are plenty more out there if you don’t want to donate to these links.

MASTERLIST BUY ME A COFFEE

Winter weather will be hitting Texas this weekend. You can expect lots of snow and ice. It is best to prepare for possible power outages and water being turned off. That is worst case scenario, but be prepared as Sunday will be a cold one.

You panicked. Growing up in North Texas you never had to deal with severe winter weather. You were used to dealing with tornados. But the way they were talking on the news, this weekend was going to be bad.

Thankfully you had the day off and were able to go to the store. You grabbed a case of water and food that you could prepare and food that didn’t have to be cooked to eat. You were still getting used to the adult life as an 18 year old, but since you had been taking care of yourself the last few years, you learned a thing or two in the kitchen. You made sure to grab some snacks as well since they didn’t have to be cooked or stored in the fridge either.

As you pulled up to your apartment building, you got a call from the lead and producer of the show you were on. You still weren’t sure how you managed to land the role of Stella in the new show Walker, but you were grateful. You put the car in park and grabbed your phone.

“Hey Jare.” You said. Jared was the older brother you always wanted, even though he plays your dad and he has moments where he acts like your dad. You didn’t have a great life growing up and to have a male figure in your life to help you in anyway, made you happy. Same thing with Gen.

“Hey Y/N/N. How’re you doing?” He asked.

“I’m doing good. Just got back from the store. Am I needed on set?” You asked in a panic thinking you missed something.

“No, no you’re not needed. Just wanted to call and tell you we are not filming Monday or Tuesday next week. And depending on the weather and roads, we may cancel Wednesday as well.” He informed you.

“Oh. Is it because of the storm?” You asked.

“Yeah. We aren’t sure how bad it’ll be, but we are hoping we are just being over cautious.” He said. “You said you went to the store?”

“Yeah. I just wanted to get something’s so I won’t have to get out. And I got some stuff. I won’t need to cook in case we lose power. Also filled up with gas in case I lose heat and need to warm up some.” You told him.

“Come stay with us. We have plenty of room and we have a fireplace. We just restocked our firewood supply. I don’t want to be worrying about you all weekend.” He said.

“I’ll be okay. Really. Thank you for the offer though.” You said nicely. You really did mean it. You were used to taking care of yourself that when people did want to help you, you appreciated them.

“Well. I have my truck if I need to come get you. If you change your mind, come over. The kids would love to see you.” He said. You heard Gen agree with him in the background. “And Gen would too.”

“Well after the storm, I’ll come over for dinner to see everyone. And I’ll even come another night to babysit so you and Gen can go on a date.” You said with a laugh once you heard Gen immediately laugh.

“Gen says you don’t have to, but I will take you up on both offers.” Jared told you. “Okay. Well stay in touch. They say it’ll start sometime tomorrow night.”

“Y’all stay safe and stay in touch too.” You said. “Bye Jare.”

“Bye Y/N/N.” He said before hanging up. You put your phone back into your pocket before lugging all of the groceries into your apartment. You put everything away before going to change out of your winter clothes.

After changing into some PJs to be comfortable. You decided to meal prep some so you wouldn’t have to worry about it later. And if the weather isn’t as bad as they think it’ll be, you can just eat them throughout the week.

Sunday morning, you woke up and looked outside. All you could see was white fluffiness. You smiled as the world looked at peace. You loved snow. You always thought it brought beauty to the world.

When you walked back to your phone where it laid on its charger, you saw a couple of texts from Jared and Gen. Both had sent you photos of Tom, Shep, and Odette playing the in the snow. Then you saw Jared’s text about possible rolling power outages.

You picked up the phone and called Jared and before he could even say hello, you asked, “What does that mean? Your text... I don’t understand it.”

“It means they’ll shut the power off for an hour to three hours to preserve energy.” Jared said.

“Oh.” You said.

“Yeah, so if the power goes out, don’t worry, it should come back on.” He reassured you.

“Okay. Thank you for letting me know.” You replied.

“Of course. How are you doing anyways?” He asked.

“Good. Just woke up. Felt good to sleep in. I’m probably about to start warming up my lunch.” You informed him. “How are y’all handling it over there? I saw the pics you and Gen sent. The kids look like they’re having a blast.”

“We’re doing good. The kids are definitely loving the snow. I did have to help Gen gather the chickens this morning which wasn’t fun.” He said with a laugh.

“Oh gosh. Yeah chasing chickens isn’t fun. Are they okay? I didn’t even think about y’all’s animals?”

“They’re all in the barn with heat lamps. Thankfully the barn is powered by solar so we don’t have to worry too much if the power goes out since we have a lot of energy stored up.” He said.

“Good that’s good. Well I’ll let you get back to doing whatever you were doing. Thanks again for letting me know.”

“Anytime. If you need something, holler. Okay?” He asked.

“I will. Bye.” You said. You heard his farewell as you went to hang up the phone. After preheating the oven, you took the lasagna and boxed garlic bread out of the freezer. You figured, while the power was still on, you could cook the one meal you prepped that couldn’t be eaten cold until you cooked it and it was leftovers.

An hour later, you sat at the counter charging your phone and iPad while you ate. When you went to take another bite, the power cut off.

“Great.” You whispered. You knew it was only going to be for a few hours, but you were a little aggravated by the inconvenience. You stood up and went and put on thicker sweatpants and your socks. When you made it back to your phone to text Jared that your power went out, you saw you barely had any service. That concerned you in case you needed to make a call for an emergency.

Power just went out. Hopefully y’all didn’t lose power. I’ll let you know when it’s back on. Sent 1:23 pm

You continued to eat as you awaited a response. Shrugging when you finished your meal and put the dirty dish in the sink, you moved to the living room to read a book you started the night before.

Hours later, you still had no power and you still hadn’t heard from Jared or Gen. You had checked social media, but neither had posted anything. You decided to scroll through Twitter and saw the horrors of people’s pipes bursting and roofs caving in flooding their homes.

Seeing people in Austin posting that, you decided to grab a tote to store your valuables in. Sadly, it wasn’t a lot, but the idea of losing what little you had that meant something to you scared you.

You needed to go to your car to charge your phone and warm up some, so you decided to store your valuables in the trunk. Thankfully you had a covered parking space that was right in front of your apartment. When you put the tote in the trunk, you checked to make sure the tail pipe was clear of snow before you started the car.

After spending an hour in the car, you decided it was time for bed. Grabbing every piece of blankets you had, you cuddled up in Jared’s hoody that you stole from him when you filmed episode 2 of Walker and all the blankets. You even had on two pairs of socks on since you got cold earlier.

The next morning, you checked to see your phone still had more than half its battery life left. But what shocked you was still no response from Jared. You got on Instagram and saw that Gen had posted a boomerang of him with his socks on as gloves, but neither had checked in with you.

You were kind of upset by this. You knew they didn’t owe you anything, but it still hurt. Going to the kitchen, you saw it was flooded.

“Oh no. Oh no. Nonononono.” You panicked. You ran to the bathroom and grabbed all the towels you owned and rushed back to the kitchen. You threw them down to try and absorb as much water as possible. You opened the cabinet and saw the pipe that had burst. You grabbed your phone and called the landlord.

“Hey Craig. I had a pipe burst this morning.” You said when he answered.

“Can’t do much with the weather like this.” He said not really caring.

“Can you turn the water off or something? Or tell me where it is and I’ll do it.” You said getting angry.

“Can’t do that either. If I do that, your neighbors lose their water too.” He said.

“Well what am I supposed to do. Just sit in water all day?” You asked with an annoyed tone.

“City’s running out of water anyway so they may shut it off. So won’t be long before it stops.” He said. You got so mad that you hung up. He was useless.

After 3 hours, all of your towels were soaked and you started using some of your clothes to help absorb what the towels couldn’t. You had tried calling Jared to see if he knew what to do but it went straight to voicemail. Same with Gen.

After using most of your clothes to stop the water, you decided to pack a bag in case you had to leave. Plus it would let you know what you could use to absorb the water that still remains. Thankfully your landlord had turned the water off after multiple people called about pipes bursting. All you had to do was finish cleaning up the mess.

Two days later, you were sitting in your car, about to go back into your apartment when you got a call from Gen.

“Y/N. Oh my gosh it’s so good to hear from you. We haven’t had service, plus we lost power and had a few pipes burst. Are you okay?” She asked worriedly.

“I’m okay. Sitting in my car right now so I could charge my phone and warm up a bit.” You told her.

“You don’t have power still?” She asked.

“Nope. And I also had a pipe burst. But I cleaned it up and nothing was damaged. Did you have any damage done? Is everyone okay?” You asked concerned.

“Yeah. We are fine. And just minimal floor damage.” She told you. “Jared is cleaning that mess up while I’m going to the store. Do you need anything? We have some of our neighbors over trying to stay warm and I’m grabbing them stuff too. So I don’t mind getting you anything.”

“I’m okay. I have plenty.” You said. You wanted heat. You wanted to sleep without having to wear five layers, but you refused to ask.

“Well if you do need something, text or call. Hopefully we get service back.” She said.

“I will. Thanks Gen.” you said as you hung up. Ten minutes later you got a call from Jared.

“Pack a bag and bring some blankets.” He said before you could even greet him.

“What?” You asked genuinely confused.

“I said, pack a bag and bring some blankets. Also if you want to bring any food you don’t want to go to waste or if you have water, bring that too. I’ll come in and help you carry.” He said.

“Wh-wait.. what is happening?” You asked.

“I’m coming to get you and you are going to stay with us for a couple of days. I just got off the phone with Gen and she said you had a pipe burst and you don’t have heat. So you are going to come stay with us until your power is back on and the pipe is fixed.” He said. “I’m pulling up. I’ll be inside in a second.” He hung up before you could say anything.

You went and unlocked the door before moving to your room. You grabbed your big suitcase and packed what few pair of pants you had, a weeks worth of underwear, two weeks worth of socks since you hated having cold feet, and the remaining three sweaters and seven shirts you had. It barely filled your suitcase so you decided to throw in a couple of hoodies as well.

“That all your packing?” Jared asked concerned. No one knew how long this was going to last.

“It’s all I got clean.” You answered honestly.

“No way.” He said in disbelief. You shrugged and told him to follow you as you walked into the kitchen. He saw the pile of clothes and towels on the ground. “Oh Y/N. I’m sorry this happened to you.”

“Happened to you too.” You said before moving back to your room. You grabbed a blanket and started to fold it, starting a pile you were taking with you to the Padalecki’s. Once you finished that, you grabbed your pillow too.

“Want any books or anything? You have room in your suitcase.” Jared said as he pointed to it. You shrugged and grabbed a few books you had been wanting to read. After throwing them into the suitcase, you ran to the living room to grab your iPad and chargers.

“We can charge them in the cars if we need to.” Jared said when you thought about not putting them in your bag. You nodded before throwing them in and zipping it up. “This ready to go to the truck?” You nodded once again before he grabbed the suitcase handle and stack of blankets and your pillow with ease. “Go figure out food and I’ll come back to help.”

Once in the kitchen, you grabbed the full water case you had bought a few days before and the almost empty one that you had already opened. You then moved to the fridge to grab the few casserole dishes you had left to eat. You grabbed your travel food carrier and put the casseroles in first before the almost empty case of water in after it. You saw Jared walking back in and asked,

“Is there any food of mine you want? I’ve got everything packed that will definitely go bad before I get back. The rest has already gone bad.” You said while looking at Jared who was looking through your cabinets. He found your snack one and grabbed a few things and shoved them in your carrier.

“That’s all I want.” He smirked. “Ready to go? We can come back in a couple of days if we need to.”

“Ready.” You walked to his truck and he helped you load the water and carrier. As you got into the passenger seat and started to buckle, you said, “thanks for coming to get me and letting me stay with you.”

“Anything for family.” He said smiling at you before driving carefully back to his house.

“But we aren’t family?” You said more as a question.

“You’re my tv daughter, so technically we are.” He said with a laugh. “But in all seriousness, I do see you as family. Me and you have gotten close over these past few months. I can see you as a daughter and I can see you as a little sister.” You could hear the sincerity in his voice.

“Really?” You asked. He nodded his head. “It means a lot to hear you say that. I see you as a big brother.”

“Good.” You saw him smile. “That means you can ask me for anything or do anything and I’ll be there for you. Sorry I didn’t come get you sooner. I thought about it.”

“It’s okay. I tried calling but could never get through. It happens. I’m just glad nothing more serious happened. I’m glad we are all safe.” You said honestly.

“And we are about to get you warm. We have the fire going in the living room and in mine and Gen’s room. Kids have been sleeping with us or on the floor in our room. You’re welcome to make a pallet in front of the fire and crash there.” He said as he pulled into his driveway.

“Sleeping in front of a warm fire sounds lovely right now. Thank you.” You leaned over and gave him a big hug. “I love you Jare.” You said before pulling back to kiss his cheek.

“Love you too y/n/n.” He smiled at you. “Now let’s go take all this in and get you warmed up.”

Tags: @deadcoldhearts

#jared padalecki #jared x reader #jared padalecki x reader #jared padalecki rpf #jared padalecki one shot #jared padalecki imagines #jared padalecki fanfic #jared padalecki fanfiction #jared rpf #cordell walker #walker #walker rpf #walker fanfiction #walker fanfic

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philliamwrites · 3 years

Text

koi no yokan

Fandom: Genshin Impact

Pairing: Kazuha / Aether

Tags: boys kissing, slight angst with happy ending, simping aether, practice sparring

Words: 2k

Summary: “A healthy mind in a healthy body,” Kazuha said, crossing the little circle they used as their practice area to the maple tree where they left their stuff. He took a dark cloth from his backpack and began wiping his body. Aether looked pointedly at the clear sky as if checking if one of Baal’s bolts would spontaneously flash and smite them. “Whatever thoughts trouble you will affect your performance and slowly but steadily deteriorate your physical capabilities.”

“Did the wind tell you that?” Aether wasn’t really into the idea that the gentle breezes cooling their hot skin spilt all his troubles. Be it his mourning for his absent sister or how horny he was for Kazuha. “Maybe the wind should just mind its own business.”

Notes: Inspired by @jeruki's fanart. My twitter: @philliam, my ko-fi: philliam

koi no yokan(恋の予感) (n.) lit. "Premonition of Love"; the sense one can have upon first meeting another person that the two of them are going to fall in love. It is the feeling that future love is inevitable.

In his journey through Teyvat, Aether had seen a lot of things. Dragons, assassins, sentient flowers shooting their frozen or burning seeds at him which never made for a funny joke when he and his party sat around the campfire in the cool evenings. Catboys grown into men who paid their taxes and lived a humble life near calm Springvale. Name it and Aether had seen it.

But Kaedehara Kazuha was something else entirely. When he fought, it was hard to look away. He had a dancer’s grace and a seemingly unerring instinct for what his opponent would do next. His sword wasn’t simply a weapon he swung to cut through enemy lines. It was part of him. Like Lumine completed Aether, Kazuha was only fully himself with a weapon in his hand. This kind of commitment Aether only knew from Xiao, but Kazuha made his devotion for battle look divine; so much purer. Almost innocent in a way that did not speak of foolishness or guilelessness or the innocence of a child that simply waited to be consumed by the world. Kazuha’s innocence was something honest, linked to the making at the heart of the world.

He looked happiest with his sword slicing through the air. He looked graceful plunging from the skies like a hawk pouncing to catch its prey. He looked deliciously fuckable with his hitatare slipping off his shoulders and revealing smooth, white skin glistening with sweat. Aether had noticed a little scar winking at him whenever the fabric slipped and wondered how it would taste like near that elegant curve where Kazuha’s chest turned to solid, firm abs. He imagined leaning over and tasting Kazuha’s skin and suck—

A harsh blow swiped his feet from under him. The world spun and for a moment Aether was flying again, soaring through the sky before golden eyes flashed in malice and his sister was taken from him. The reality of Lumine being absent would come to Aether in flashes. He knew it to be so, but he could not feel it to be true except in these sudden bursts of realisation. The light of that strange, unthinkable truth would dazzle him for a moment and then it would be gone again, a fleeting sense of terrible loss. The pain almost always felt the same, and all he could do in that moment was take it, endure the unbearable and bear it.

It ended as quickly as it stared. Aether’s back hit the hard ground, the impact punching the breath out of his lungs. He stared up at the beautiful crimson sky stretching overhead—red like so many things in Inazuma which was fitting for the country governed by a goddess with a taste for blood.

But then, Kazuha’s even more beautiful face bent over him.

“Focus, Aether,” he said, offering his hand. Aether imagined pulling Kazuha down next to him where they would roll in the dirt like two puppies, drunk on adrenaline and intoxicated with the addicting taste of defiling these sacred lands where the cries of helpless, innocent men would never be heard over the ever-present roar of thunder. Where neither of them was welcome.

Instead, he allowed Kazuha to pull him back up on his feet, slick skin against slick skin, with a swift ease that left little room for imagination how else he could manhandle Aether. He swallowed, his mouth dry.

Kazuha exhaled softly, and even in that companionable silence Aether had grown used to, it was loud enough to catch his attention. “Where are your thoughts, Aether?” Kazuha asked.

Aether kicked some pebbles. He could hardly confess how he imagined sucking Kazuha off. Somehow he didn’t think someone as versed, with a soul consumed by wanderlust like Kazuha, would like to hear that. So he simply shrugged, inspecting the hilt of his wooden practice sword as if it could be held accountable for his lack of focus.

“Oh, you know,” he said, shrugging. “Archons and Visions and the like. The usual stuff.”

Kazuha’s eyebrows rose. Aether held his stare for a long minute but ended up turning away first. Somehow he didn’t believe secrets could be kept hidden for too long from those keen scarlet eyes, and while he wouldn’t mind presenting his body to him, he wasn’t too comfortable bearing his very soul to someone he’d known for less than a month. He wondered if that even mattered. He had let Kaeya rail him in much shorter time than that.

“A healthy mind in a healthy body,” Kazuha said, crossing the little circle they used as their practice area to the maple tree where they left their stuff. He took a dark cloth from his backpack and began wiping his body. Aether looked pointedly at the clear sky as if checking if one of Baal’s bolts would spontaneously flash and smite them. “Whatever thoughts trouble you will affect your performance and slowly but steadily deteriorate your physical capabilities.”

The wind picked up, tossing Aether’s hair left and right so it came even more loose after their sparring. He was sure his mind played tricks on him, but somewhere in the distance it sounded like Venti’s clear, bell-like laughter. If this was his weird way of trying to set him up, Aether was not happy with it.

“No, you just did.” Kazuha finished cleaning himself, but was in no apparent hurry to tie up his hitatare. When he looked back up at Aether, his smile was a little mischievous but still gentle, and Aether wanted to kiss that stupid grin away. He flopped down next to Kazuha. Dry maple leaves rustled under his body and he took one in his fingers, turning it this and that way just so he could observe the crimson and stall time.

If he met the Raiden Shogun and she didn’t have the answers he desired, then what? How much longer would he have to journey, to tread foreign countries and dangerous lands until he found what Lumine needed him to see? Why was this arduous task better suited than simply telling him? The only logical answer was that during her own travels, Lumine had grown to not trust him in a way only she understood and couldn’t confide in him. The thought closed like a cold fist around Aether’s heart. There was nothing logical about that, for if Lumine chose to hide her heart from Aether, where would that leave him? Loneliness spread like a dark stain inside him, a horror that stole his breath and tightened his chest. Black dots danced across his vision. Aether noticed his body moving without his will, he sat up, afraid he might suffocate. His heart. His heart wasn’t in his chest anymore. It was in his throat, making it hard to breathe. Just thinking she doesn’t need me, Lumine is gone forever and all I have loved, I have loved alone—

A warm hand grasped his, squeezing his fingers painfully until his splintering mind reassembled to the present. Aether stared at Kazuha with wide eyes, filled with horror, with fear, he just couldn’t understand how anyone bore that loneliness without a twin, without another part of their soul bearing the harsh world with them and give comfort and respite.

“Aether?”

Aether flinched, only noticing then how close Kazuha hovered near his face. When he looked down, he saw how his golden strands were caught between Kazuha’s slender fingers.

“There was a maple leaf in your hair,” Kazuha said, not taking his eyes away from Aether.

“Oh.” Aether’s reeling thoughts momentarily halted at this whimsical observation, so simple and apart from his anxious feelings. He looked up at the grand tree above them, crying red leaves. “Really?”

Kazuha still looked at him. A gentle tug lowered Aether’s head back down.

“No,” he said, and then kissed him. His soft lips brushed against Aether’s once, then twice and then he pressed his mouth to his, pushing Aether to the solid, hard ground. One leg stole between Aether’s, pressing a knee against his crotch, and Oooh. Until now, Aether had thought Kazuha to be soft and restrained, a man more servant to the voice of nature than his own desires. But there was nothing soft or restrained about the way he pinned Aether to the ground now, stole his breath and swallowed all those little huffs and moans, making Aether go crazy with lust.

Swift fingers dug into his bare waist. Aether was looking forward to the bruises he’d see blossoming the next morning. Their bodies pressed together hard; Aether arched his back, hoping that if he just willed it hard enough, he would become one with Kazuha and fill that gnawing black hole inside him. Kazuha reached out and put his thumb to Aether’s jawline. The tips of his fingers brushed the hollow of his throat and pushed against the pulse point where Aether’s blood visibly thundered in exalting beats against his skin.

Kazuha’s tongue darted across Aether’s lower lip. Willingly, Aether opened his mouth, longing to savour his taste and finally quench his thirst for the exquisite being that Kaedahara Kazuha was.

But Kazuha remained still, their mouths inches away from each other, each inhaling the other’s breath. Aether opened his eyes, meeting Kazuha’s that had turned so much darker. Wilder.

“You don’t even know what you do to people, do you?” he mumbled against Aether’s lips. His nose grazed his cheek as he dove for Aether’s jawline, his neck, mapping Aether’s face with his lips and teeth. Aether remembered Kazuha saying once that he smelled like stars, and wondered how that worked.

“What—“ Aether exhaled a long, shuddering breath. “—do you mean?” He tried to buck up into Kazuha, to create some delicious friction between them, but Kazuha’s grip around his waist was like iron. Aether whined, but Kazuha made with one, sharp bite pretty clear that whatever happened would only happen on his volition.

“The way you move, the way you look and think no one notices.” Amusement stole into Kazuha’s voice. “Or might you think only I don’t notice?”

“I am anything but subtle,” Aether acknowledged, planting a kiss on Kazuha’s temple. He chuckled against Aether’s skin. “And you don’t necessarily make it easier, fighting like this.” His hands sneaked inside Kazuha’s hitatare, fingers trembling with excitement spread against his warm chest.

Kazuha inhaled sharply. His own fingers trailed a path up Aether’s waistline, nails scratching the sensitive skin and sending shivers all over his body. “Look who’s talking. It’s hard focusing on anything else with you walking around like this.”

Aether laughed, dark and rich. “It’s my pleasure.”

“No.” Kazuha tugged the fabric of Aether’s black collar down and kissed his neck. “It’s mine.”

Aether didn’t know how long they stayed like this, cradled against the maple tree’s trunk, growing drunk on kisses and lust and the taste of each other until their lips were bruised. At some point, they had dozed off under the setting sun that made way to twinkling stars that winked at them in mischief. Only they knew the secrets and confessions they shared, absolving one another from their darkest sins.

“I know you seek your sister,” Kazuha said, studying the joints and bumps on Aether’s fingers before he brought them to his lips. “We both follow steps of people dear to us, choosing to ignore we only run after shadows. I think that is why my soul refuses to leave you.”

Familiar pain throbbed in Aether’s chest, but where it once was sharp and overwhelming, it now had softened to a dull song. Bearable. “I’m sure one day we’ll catch up to them.” He intertwined his legs with Kazuha’s, felt the warmth radiate off his body. “Together.”

#genshin impact #genshin #ao3 #philliamwrites #genshin impact kazuha #genshin impact aether #genshin impact kaedahara kazuha #kazuha x aether #kazuther #genshin impact kazuha x aether #genshin impact kazuther

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kiliinstinct · 4 years

Text

Stood Up - Nalu OneShot

I was inspired yesterday and this came from it. And I mean, super burst of inspiration. Apologies, but I wrote it as soon as the idea entered my head, and it’s not edited. This story was inspired by this post that came across my dash yesterday. I hope you all enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it!

--- Tag List ---

@phoenix-before-the-flame @pbfanart @cobblepottantrum @yuldragneel @mamabearcat @millennial-star-gazer @caandleworks / @caandlle @kaycha1989 @furidojasutin @eragonsoul @just-another-dream-girl @whatdidyasayiamdaydreaming @dlshieldss @ctay21 @acidrain1698 @lovelyluce @clockworkassassino @celestialwolf24 @unwei @jem-hamster-chan @melissa827 @meilynalu @littlejinxed @moonlitstargazerforever @trollka21 @doginshoe @squeep123 @bitch-stole-my-nutella-again @sonicloudbat @lonleyloser

----

Ten minutes late. While it wasn’t ideal, Lucy could accept it. Rather than place an order for food, she asked for water instead and checked her pocket mirror for the fifth time. Perfect, but the more the overhead radio switched songs, the more she tapped her foot, patience wearing thin. The urge to check the mirror for a sixth and seventh time was rising.

Instead, she sipped her water and checked the time again: twenty minutes.

Where was he?

Paranoia began to set in as she looked around the small, corner restaurant. It wasn’t the most notable of places. A small business off the corner of downtown that only the locals truly appreciated. She had always wanted to try it, finding the dim lights and cramped walls very homely. Dan, her date, had argued at first. He didn’t think such a place was worthy of a girl in her class. ‘A true beauty deserves a beautiful meal!’ He had stated. While this irritated her, Lucy dismissed his words and pointed out that it was her turn to choose the place. He gave in eventually. It was their tenth date. One that was supposed to be special. The time she finally opened the door to her apartment and asked him to join her, if all went well. He’d wanted that after the third date, but-

Lucy felt that a true connection required more time. Trust was earned, after all, and she refused to to be quick to give it. She sighed and took another glance at her phone, lips pulling into a frown when the time ticked to Seven-Thirty. She couldn’t keep waiting like this! Pulling up her contacts, she dialed Dan’s number and waited for it to connect. Her glossy, manicured nails tapped against the table in a rushed staccato.

Were people watching her? No, no, of course not. They had their own dates and families to tend to. There was no way they’d look twice at her. As her phone rang in her ear, the waiter passed again, only to be waved off after refilling her water. The clink of the ice cubes only served to raise her irritation. Why wasn’t he picking up? The voicemail message picked up, Dan’s boisterous voice echoing through as he requested a name and phone number to reach out to. Lucy hung up and struck redial.

It didn’t ring. The start of his voicemail came again and Lucy sniffed, staring wide eyed at the phone in disbelief.

“Did he just… “ Baffled, she listened to the message all the way through, “hit the f-u button?”

Must have been an accident, she reasoned. Sipping her water far too quick, Lucy grimaced from the blast of cold that shit through her brain as her phone dialed out again. And again. Three more times. Voicemail every time. Either he kept sending her to voicemail or his phone had shut off.

Lucy wasn’t sure which reason she liked better.

“Excuse me, Miss, but are you ready to order now? I don’t mean to rush,” The waiter was back again, looking uncomfortable. Lucy stiffened and set her phone aside, trying to remain aloof and calm. “Oh, no, not yet.” She said, waving him off. His blue eyes stared into her own. Pretty, all things considered, but Lucy didn’t miss the look of pity that swam in them. Did he know what was happening? Feeling the heat rise in her cheeks, she cleared her throat and tapped the phone, forcing a false smile. “He’s just running late, that’s all. My date should be here soon!”

She hoped her words were true, but the sinking feeling in her gut said otherwise. Her waiter shrugged, telling her to wave him down if she needed anything and shuffled off to the next table. Lucy couldn’t help but follow him for a few seconds, horror setting in when she realized the couple at the next table were staring at her with looks of pity. One even mouthed ‘I’m sorry’ before turning their attention away.

Lucy’s lungs tightened as her ability to breathe became worse. She licked her lips and checked her phone once more, sighing when she read the time. He was late by an hour now. An hour. How long was he expecting her to wait?! “Lucy, grow a spine. If he’s being this late then obviously he-... he isn’t coming and you should take your loss and leave.” The pep talk she muttered did little to make her move. What if she was wrong? What if his phone really did die and he was caught in traffic? What if she left and more people just stared with those pitying gazes? It was becoming harder to breathe and she gulped down the rest of her water, grimacing. She’d have to run to the bathroom the rest of the night with the amount she’d drank , but what else could she do?

She checked her phone again. And facebook. Even twitter. Dan hadn’t posted anywhere. Where WAS he? Did something happen? Maybe she could call a - that’s it! Lucy swiped to her messages, finding the number of Dan’s room mate, Mary.

‘Do you know where Dan is?’ She asked, desperately trying to stay calm rather than allow her overactive imagination to run away with her. Lucy began to rummage through her purse again, withdrawing her small hand mirror and lip gloss to reapply her makeup. If he WAS just held up by traffic, then it would be worth it, right?

Lucy was stunned when her phone buzzed just as the lip applicator touched her skin. Not expecting the fact response, she dropped the gloss and checked the reply that flashed upon her screen. Eyes widened and the phone slipped through her fingers, clattering against the table as it fell to the floor.

Mary’s reply glowed on the screen in big, curious letters, ‘Didn’t you and Dan break up?’

Break up? Since when? They’d spoken earlier about their excitement for their date tonight. She’d even verified the address with him! What was Mary talking about-? Lucy’s fingers shook and she rushed to retrieve her phone, wincing when she caught the slight laughter of a table a few feet from her. Their gazes were pointed, watching her move as her eyes watered. I will not cry!

Lucy wanted to be angry. To let this moment fall into fires of fury and burn away the tears threatening to fall and distract her from the embarrassment that stabbed her. He stood her up. There was no other explanation, was there? Swallowing thickly, she tapped through her phone again, blinking back the waves of shame that pushed to fall. All her messages to Dan were on read, all her calls ignored. Swiping to her friend’s number, she began to type a quick message. ‘Can I stay with you tonight?’

The message sent and lip quivered. She steeled herself for the shameful walk she’d have to take to the exit. Everyone would know. Everyone did know. Even that waiter, with his dark hair covering half his face (and wasn’t he wearing a vest earlier?), was sending her knowing looks. She noticed his hand clenched to a fist as their eyes met and felt a strange wave of appreciation. He felt the fury that refused to consume her. That was nice, at least. She grabbed for her wallet to set a small tip on the table.

So what if she hadn’t ordered anything. He’d been nice. It was the least she could do for wasting his time. Unable to resist the disappointing settling in her bones, Lucy stuffed her things into her bag and slid out of her booth. She wouldn’t cry. Not until she was outside in the sunset with just herself for company.

Lucy didn’t make it a step from her table when a sudden rush of feet and hurried gasp interrupted her thoughts. Heavy footsteps slammed against the floor as a warm voice melted into her ears.

“Shoot, I’m sorry! Traffic was a bitch!” The voice said, sheepishly, “you- you’re not leaving, are you?”

Lucy’s heart stuttered and she blinked: confused. That voice…

It was not Dan.

She lifted her head and felt the words die in her mouth.

While it was not her tall, broad shouldered, brunette of a boyfriend (possibly ex) - it was a man with a smile that made her cheeks warm and eyes that peered into her own as if he could read her mind. A little intense, but she barely noticed the discomfort of his stare, too stunned by the shock of pink hair on his head. A set of barrettes kept his bangs from his face as dark roots shone beneath the lighter colors. Her face burned even hotter when he cleared his throat and Lucy realized she was caught staring. “Uh, I- “ She stammered, looking for a proper response, “I was, actually.”

What else would she be doing? Who was this guy? Her mind and his movements were a whirlwind as he clicked his tongue and ushered her back to her seat. Lucy started to protest, but stared, dubious, when he muttered, “just go with it!” Into her ear.

In seconds, she was back in her seat with her water refilled and the strange guy had sat across from her, lounging in his seat as if he owned the place and hadn’t just sat with a stranger. If Lucy hadn’t been so caught up in her emotions and the oddity of the moment, she may have considered the guy cute, all things considered.

“Listen,” She began again, finally forcing her mouth to work, “I think there’s been a misunderstanding-”

“Shhht!” He hissed, one finger on his lips to silence her. He leaned forward to keep his voice low, “The name’s Natsu. Whoever stood you up is a dick and I’m gonna fix it!” When he was met with silence, he rethought his words and slightly back pedaled, “if you’ll let me that is.”

Realization finally dawned and Lucy’s jaw dropped. Natsu, reading her expression as consent, leaned back in his chair and quickly flagged the waiter down. The looks of pity around the room turned to relief and shame at eavesdropping with many onlookers turning their gazes elsewhere. Lucy felt a weight fall off her chest, now that she was no longer the center of attention. Taking in a deep breath, she marveled at the situation and wondered if it was best to end the farce before it started and leave. The waiter had arrived and was sharing furious whispers with the other, both looked irritated before Natsu’s grin grew larger, satisfied with whatever conversation had gone between them. “Oi, just go ahead and get me a coke and - “ he looked to Lucy and smirked lazily, “What do ya’ want? I’ll cover it.”

Wait, was he serious? Looking from him and to the waiter, she cleared her throat and muttered a quick, “Sweet Tea with Lemon, please,” and the waiter was off. Natsu didn’t waste a second of time, opening one of the menus to hold it out to her. “So, what’s your name,” He asked lazily, prodding her fingers until she took the menu and opened it. “I’m sorry?” Lucy still felt like she was missing a few steps in the dark. Natsu snickered, “Well, you don’t have to tell me, but I figured this would look more real if I knew your name. Or I could just make up one?”

Lucy’s earlier horror was being buried beneath amused bafflement. The entire situation felt so surreal, but Lucy was beginning to warm up to the idea. A hint of a real smile curled at her lips and she sipped her water, eyeing Natsu through her lashes. “And what sort of name would you give me?” She asked.

Was she flirting only minutes after learning she’d been dumped? Something must have jarred a screw loose in her head. Natsu didn’t seem to mind, however, as he scrunched his nose in though and tapped a finger to his chin. “How about… Luigi?”

“What?!” Lucy sputtered, pushing the glass aside. “You can’t call me that, I’m a girl!”

Natsu’s expression looked much like the cat who caught the canary, “Then you got no choice, but to tell me your name. Or it’s Luigi for the rest of the evening!” “No way, you have to pick another or I’m leaving.”

It was his turn to sputter, “Oi, that’s not fair, you already agreed to-” “And I can change my mind at any time.” She asserted, eyes gleaming. Natsu knitted his brows together in thought before he laughed again. Rather than give her a new name, he tapped the menu again. That smirk was making the twisted knots in her stomach detangle and curl in a way she wasn’t expecting. Odd, Lucy thought, she hadn’t felt warm from such a smile in a long time. “Go ahead and pick something. I already know what I’m having and all the meals are affordable! You’ll like everything, I swear.”

Her attention turned back to the menu and she nibbled her lip, “you haven’t even looked at it.” She accused me.

“Don’t need to. I know everything about it.” He replied flippantly, but gave no further explanation. The smile on his face spoke of mischief, making Lucy wonder if she had failed to notice something about him, but she shrugged and chose a meal to order either way.

Her phone buzzed and she glanced at it, surprised to see her friend had answered, full of worry towards the conclusion of her date. She began to type a response, but paused, unsure of what to say. Natsu snorted. “Wow,” He teased, “already on your phone. Am I that boring?”

“Maybe you are,” Lucy said pointedly, laughing when he squawked in mock offense. Her fingers quickly ran across the screen, sending a quick, ‘I’ll tell you later. My Date’s still going.’ Giggling, she put it back in her purse and looked to her pouting savior. “I was letting my friend, Levy, know that I would stop by her house later.”

“Oh, is that all?” He propped his chin in the palm of his hand and observed her. “You really just gonna give your friend’s name that easy, but can’t give me yours?”

Oh, crap, she really did do that. Abashed, Lucy turned her nose in the air and said stiffly, “You still haven’t given me a new one.”

Natsu’s grin was nothing short of sly, “Nah, it’s a secret now. I’d rather your real name anyway.”

It was hard to argue with that. Curiosity urged Lucy to needle him for more answers, but she was interrupted by their drinks arriving. Natsu took the opportunity to rattle off his order, a rather large one if she read the menu correctly. In a few seconds, the waiter was gone again, with both menus and Lucy wondered when the tears had stopped trying to fall.

The pain was still there, dull and throbbing in her chest, but it felt.. Distant, in that moment. Natsu jabbed his straw into his coke before slurping away without a care in the world. It was something Dan would have called “uncivilized” for a girl like her. One of the many reasons her father insisted they date. Had she been fooling herself all this time? The thoughts swirled in her mind and Lucy realized she had much to think about.

“Lucy.” Her name spilled forth without further prompting. Natsu paused from his drink to blink at her, expression almost slack jawed as the straw dangled between his lips and teeth. “My name is Lucy.”

It wasn’t an immediate fix, but this man had already slapped a bandage on her aching heart. The least she could do was give her name.

The straw popped from Natsu’s mouth as he laughed, “Hah! Luigi wasn’t too far off!” “H-hey! They sound nothing alike!”

It was absurd. Crazy even, but Lucy began to laugh right along with Natsu. Their joined giggles filled the space between them and the ice was broken. Her now pseudo date began and with every new topic approached by Natsu, more laughter ensued. Eventually, Lucy did cry, but only from humor. When their meal came, Natsu ate with gusto, leaving bits of crumbs and sauce on the side of his mouth and for once in her life, Lucy didn’t feel the need to constantly dab her mouth with a tissue. It was a comfortable back and forth. By the time they both cleaned their plates, the restaurant was near empty and all the streetlights had lit up the windows.

It was getting late, and Lucy’s phone buzzed with more messages. Each went ignored. Lucy didn’t think to check the time until the bill had been placed on the table, quickly swept up by Natsu before she could glance at it. “You really don’t have to cover for me.” She said, feeling guilty. Natsu waved her off as he pulled a card from his pants pocket. Lucy didn’t bother asking why he didn’t have a wallet, assuming it was one of his many quirks.

“You’re right. I don’t.” Natsu agreed, making no move to hand her the bill, “but I want to so I’m going to.”

Leaning back in her chair, Lucy blew a strand of hair from her face and sighed. “You didn’t have to do any of this.”

Natsu, for the first time that night, grew solemn. A growl of frustration rumbled through his frame and he ran his hands through his hair, searching for the right words. “Yes. Yes I did. Or I would have regretted it for the rest of my life.”

“You’re exaggerating.” Lucy accused, ignoring the way his words made her ears turn red. Natsu denied it, shaking his head as his obvious annoyance turned to anger. “No.” He bluntly said. “I’m not. You were being stared at and clearly upset. What sort of guy would I be if I just let you run out to cry like that? Tch.” he reached over the table to tuck the blond strand of hair behind her ear and sighed. “I had to try and make your day better. It didn’t sit right with me not to.”

Lucy sniffed, eyes watering before she could stop them. Natsu reacted with a curse under his breath. “Shit, I didn’t mean to make you cry. The point was to help you smile!”

A watery laugh burst through and she wiped her eyes, smiling widely. This complete stranger saw a girl in distress and decided he had to make her smile. How touching was that? And silly. Most wouldn’t think to do that for someone they didn’t know. Wiping more tears away, she grabbed his hand in gratitude, biting back a choked sob. “You did.” She said, laughing through the tears. “You made me smile more than I had in months.”

Ah, and that was the truth of it. Despite her relationship with Dan, she’d been going through the motions. So assured that they were clicking, without fully realizing how much she pushed aside and pretended wasn’t an issue. And Natsu came and burst through the doors, showing her just how much she’d been holding back. It was uplifting and painful all at once, but Lucy couldn’t have been more grateful. “Thank you, Natsu.” She said earnestly, hoping he could understand just how much his actions meant to her. “I mean it.”

His answering smile was so bright, Lucy felt her entire torso warm up at the sight. Natsu really did have an infectious smile, Lucy thought. His hand flipped to give her own a squeeze before they separated and Lucy caught the faintest hint of red glowing on the tips of his ears. It was cute. Ridiculously so.

“Then that’s…” He said helplessly, words failing before he tried again, “That’s good then! Guess there’s only one thing left to do.”

Before Lucy could ask, he left his seat and moved to her end, holding his hand out for her to take. Grabbing her purse, she allowed him to lead her through the restaurant and to the exit. While she understood the night had to end eventually, the sudden realization that it came now made her heart stutter. She almost wasn’t ready to face the world again, turning to Natsu just as they entered the parking lot. Natsu didn’t leave the sidewalk, his hand still warm in hers as he fidgeted beside her. “Sorry if that seems a bit rushed, but I don’t want your friend to worry about you. That’s why your phone keeps buzzing, right?”

Lucy blushed, looking to her purse that vibrated from her phone again. “Oh, y-yeah.. That- probably is Levy.” She would have so many apologies to give her friend later for this! She almost whined at the thought, but turned her attention back to Natsu. “Well, I guess, this is it then.”

It was a little awkward, maybe a little silly after the night they had, but it wasn’t a real date so what else could Lucy do? She held her hand out for a shake and smiled. “Thanks for making my night the exact opposite of a disaster.”

Natsu stared at her hand as if it was dripping in goo, scrunching his nose up before he laughed, fished for something in his other pocket and slapped his hand into hers, holding a small card between the two. Lucy tried to withdraw to examine what he’d given her, but his grip tightened slightly as he grinned. “Anytime, Lucy.” He said, face splitting in half with his mischievous grin, “And I mean it. Any time. And hey, maybe-”

His words hung in the air as Lucy froze, feeling like a sudden precipice had appeared before her and she was about to tumble off it. Was he-? “You know, maybe when you feel better we can do this again sometime.” He finished, releasing her hand. “For real this time.”

The implication did not escape her. A real date. He was asking for a real date. Was it all right to agree to something so soon after a possible break up? The thoughts whirled in her head, but for once, Lucy didn’t feel overwhelmed as she had earlier. Lucy didn’t miss the message: maybe when you feel better.

Natsu was giving her the choice and the time to process her feelings and get herself in order. Just how good was this man? Beaming, she clutched the small card to her chest and nodded. “I’d like that.” It was the most honest answer she could give, and one that took her breath away from excitement. Natsu released a breath, shoulders sagging as if he’d been stone moments before and he dramatically clutched at his own heart. “Thank god!” He cried, “I’ve never just out and asked someone out before, I was for sure you’d turn me down like the weirdo you are!”

“Wait, what did you just call me-” Lucy’s words were cut off by his lips warmly pressing against her cheek and in a flurry, he dashed back to the doors and flung them open, gleefully grinning.

“That’s the other name!” He said, voice coming out in a sing song, “I was gonna call you a weirdo!”

The doors slammed shut before she could utter a reply, standing a mere twenty feet from her car and astonished. A weirdo? His other name for her was that? “What sort of name is that?!” Hilarity struck her and Lucy laughed as she unlocked her car. It wasn’t until she sat herself inside the vehicle that she realized Natsu had gone back into the restaurant rather than to his own car.

Wait, why did he-? Noticing the sign on the window had changed to closed, she stared at the card in her hand in scrutiny. She wasn’t surprised to see his cell number on the card, but then her eyes read the title of the card. Her jaw dropped again.

Natsu Dragneel: Head line Cook to the Dragneel Bar and Grill.

Lucy’s surprised shriek could be heard through the entire parking lot. “HE WORKS HERE!?”

#Mira's Fanfiction #Nalu Fanfiction #FT Fanfiction #Fairy Tail Fanfiction #Nalu #NatsuxLucy #was inspired and i went with it #why cant i write 4k words this fast usually?#fricken brain #anyway #if you thought you were on my tag list #and didn't get tagged #either tumblr wouldn't let me tag you #or your names were changed and i dont know the new urls #SO TELL ME YOUR NEW URLS #sobs

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roserozu22 · 3 years

Text

Rogercop

Author’s note: It’s me with a new update and you didn’t have to wait long. A massive thank you to my beta Nina of fairy tail!

My Social Media accounts:

Twitter: RoseRozu1

Tumblr: Roserozu22

Discord: RoseRozu#2428

Morning had sprung and Nathalie was getting Gabriel ready for a very important event - careers day at Collège Françoise Dupont.

“Sir, are you sure this is a good idea?” Nathalie asked worriedly.

“Yes, this is a good opportunity for me to see this Nathaniel boy’s parents,” Gabriel smirked.

Suddenly, the door opened and there stood Adrien fiddling with his necklace nervously. “Ready, papa?”

Gabriel looked at his youngest child and smiled reassuringly at him. “You didn’t force me to come with you, and to be fair, I haven’t seen much of your teachers, only your principal. So no need to be nervous mon petit.”

Adrien smiled at Gabriel and then took hold of his father’s hands and Felix’s once he entered the foyer. They got into the car to travel to the school.

=^._.^= ∫

When the Agreste family arrived at the school (a little late, due to some idiots on the road), they met one Mr. Tom Dupain.

“My day begins at 4 a.m. every morning because the bakery opens at 7. You would think that the life of a baker is pretty routine, making the same pastries, rolls, cakes... but actually, it's different every day. One day someone might order a cake in the shape of the Eiffel Tower, and another day you might-” Tom explained to Gabriel and Felix’s boredom and Adrien’s interest.

“Marinette will come around and pass out some croissants baked fresh this morning,” Tom said as he pointed at his daughter.

“Thank you, Mr Dupain. Now, let's meet Alya's mom, who is head chef at the Grand Paris hotel, owned by our mayor, Mr Bourgeois.” Miss Bustier.

On Marinette’s rounds, she smiled happily at Adrien. She was excited as she knew that his model career would end later than most, giving him more time to model. However, she smiled sadly at Felix as he looked disinterested. As Marinette was making the rounds, Chloé opened a case with a bracelet inside.

Sabrina looked at the bracelet and immediately grabbed it, “It's beautiful!”

Chloé then promptly slapped Sabrina’s hand. “Don't touch it!”

Whilst this was happening, Gabriel whispered in Felix’s ear, “Remind me why I sent you two to this school?”

“Because you wanted me to learn the ‘commoner’ life, and also Adrien wanted to go to school just like his big brother,” Felix whispered back.

Gabriel hummed in thought.

“Put it away, Chloé! It could get in the wrong hands!” Mr Bourgeois attempted to scold his daughter

“I wonder how many croissants your dad would have to sell to buy you one of these? What am I saying? He'd have to sell the whole store!” Chloé taunted Marinette as she noticed her passing out the croissants.

“Well, if you're so rich, obviously you don't need free croissants!” Marinette said as she left the table but not without smirking as she could hear a poor comeback from Chloé.

Meanwhile, Plagg was having a slight conundrum himself. “Is that Camembert?” Plagg asked himself as flew from Felix’s bag to Chloé's. “Huh? Oh, that's not Camembert... but it is very shiny. I like shiny, hmm!”

In the world outside of kwamis… “Unfortunately, I have no dishes to share. But maybe Mr Bourgeois will invite you all to the hotel and treat you to lunch!” Alya’s mum said while looking at her boss, with a glare that could rival Gabriel’s

The said boss nodded while sweating nervously at his employee’s glare and sighed in relief when the glare melted away. While the students were applauding, a policeman named Roger started laughing.

Unfortunately, Plagg caused Marinette to slip (as he landed on his head after continuing playing with the bracelet)

“Marinette, are you okay?” Adrien asked as he left his chair while helping the girl up, not knowing that Gabriel was staring at her intently.

Before Marinette could answer, however, Gabriel swiftly put Adrien back in his chair and stood in front of said chair protectively.

“Next on the list is Sabrina's father, a policeman. Please welcome Officer Roger!” Miss Bustier said quickly to diffuse the attention and stop Gabriel from glaring at the students and herself.

The students started applauding, although with more confusion than anything else. With a quick glare from his brother and father, Adrien didn’t even bother clapping.

“I've been a police officer for 15 years, and I firmly believe that every citizen is innocent until proven guilty.” As soon Officer Roger said this, the drama queen of the class exclaimed. “My bracelet! It's gone! I had it a second ago.” She then looks at Marinette “You! You stole it!”

“What? What are you talking about?!” Marinette asked confusedly.

“You purposely tripped over my bag so you could steal my bracelet!” Chloé then looks at Roger “You're a policeman! Arrest her!”

“My daughter is not a thief!” Tom defended Marinette and glared at the other girl.

Gabriel could only look at the students and parents and without warning, got a massive headache and thought of removing Adrien (and Felix) from the stupidity of the whole thing.

Roger then blew his whistle without warning which caused Gabriel’s headache to worsen. “Hold on a minute, Miss Bourgeois, we don't accuse without proof! Now, everyone, calm down, please. Maybe you simply misplaced your bracelet.”

“You're calling me a liar?! Daddy!” Chloé said in surprise and anger.

“Roger, I demand you search for this girl’s bracelet immediately!”

“Ha!”

“Please, everybody!” Miss Bustier pleaded although she was not heard at all.

“Need I remind you that as mayor of this city, I am your superior!” Mr Bourgeois said unkindly towards the policeman.

Before Roger could say anymore, Gabriel decided to speak up.

“I’ve had enough of this. My children don’t need to see this debacle. They came to school for their education, not some soap opera that is poorly made!” Gabriel then noticed that Felix’s friend was recording the whole thing. “This boy hasn’t stopped recording since I’ve entered the classroom, maybe there is something on there." Gabriel then gently moved Adrien from his seat and said. “I’m going back home with Adrien and until this issue is resolved he will no longer be attending school." Gabriel suddenly looked at Felix. “If you like you can go home with me or stay for the whole day.”

Felix looked at the drama gleefully and then looked at his father and replied. “I’ll stay here and see the drama unfold.” Gabriel nodded and left the classroom with a very reluctant Adrien, but not without giving his secretary’s number to Nathaniel’s parents.

=^._.^= ∫

As soon as Adrien and Gabriel arrived at the mansion, Adrien was instantly sent to his room (as according to Gabriel he had had too much excitement and needed rest) and went down to his lair and transformed into his evil alter-ego Hawkmoth.

=^._.^= ∫

At the exact moment, Mr Bourgeois and Tom were seen shouting at each other while the students were looking at the two adults in interest (mostly Felix).

Nathaniel then looked at the adults and said, “Let’s do what my Mr Agreste said and look through Nino’s video. Maybe we can find something because I for one would like to see my significant other outside of the mansion or photo shoots.”

The adults looked at the upcoming artist in shock (while Felix smiled at the artist with pride until he felt something hit his ankle and swiftly noticed that it was the missing bracelet on top of his kwami’s head and rapidly left the room quietly) not noticing that a new drama was going down.

=^._.^= ∫

Ms Mendeleiev threw a piece of litter into the bin but missed so the litter landed on the floor which caused Rogercop to grab the litter. He then flew to where Ms Mendeleiev was.

“You're under arrest!” Rogercop shouted at the poor science teacher.

“What? What for?” Ms Mendeleiev asked in confusion and horror.

“You threw litter on a public sidewalk, jaywalked and crossed the red light,” Rogercop said robotically. The police whistle was still around his neck. His skin was quite pale, and a hollow, light blue triangle pointing downwards was at the centre of his chest. His helmet sported a light blue line above a light blue shield in front of his eyes. His left shoulder and right shoulder wore blinking red and blue police lights, respectively.

“Well, I suppose I did. But you can't arrest me! Who are you anyway? You don't look like a policeman!”

Rogercop then threw cuffs at the science teacher “I sentence you to trash duty.” He then blew his whistle which controlled the handcuffs and made Ms Mendeleiev robotically throw the litter in the trash can.

“Next mission: Seeking justice on Mayor Bourgeois.”

=^._.^= ∫

Meanwhile back at the school, Felix was seen lecturing Plagg (who was still wearing the bracelet). “Never do that again! Do you know the troubles you caused!”

“I thought it was Camembert,” Plagg said. “And besides I think the bracelet suits my rock-hard abs.”

“Well, clearly it isn’t Camembert” Felix groaned and swiftly thought of something else, “and Plagg you do not have abs.” Felix then stopped as he heard footsteps and looked down and saw it was Rogercop.

“Great, great, just great, thanks to you Plagg, we have now to fight against an akumatized policeman. You’ve made another one of your dumb decisions.”

“Sorry, Felix,” Plagg said, remorsefully.

“I know, now let’s try and get this bracelet off you, and fix everything.”

Plagg nodded while Felix began looking through his locker for anything that could help. Meanwhile, Rogercop had caused one of the parents to run laps around the gymnasium.

=^._.^= ∫

Simultaneously, back at the mansion, Adrien was seen lying down on his bed with a look of boredom on his face. He was texting Nathaniel who was giving him updates regarding the situation of the missing bracelet.

=^._.^= ∫

“See, Chloé? I tripped on the bag, but Sabrina held the bracelet, we are all suspects!” Marinette said (while trying and failing to be diplomatic).

“But, what about Mr Agreste, isn’t he like in most of the video?” One of the students asked.

“To be fair, I wanted to film Adrien and Felix, but I think Mr Agreste knew what I was doing or that he wanted Adrien to not see. You can never know with that dude.” Nino said in Mr Agreste's defence.

“And let’s remember Mr Agreste is a fashion designer. If he wants to he can design any jewellery that he or the twins need or want,” Alya said.

And once again, Marinette opened her big mouth and caused the situation to be five times worse than it was until Rogercop entered the classroom uninvited. He asked the students, parents and teacher where the mayor was. They all denied that they knew where he was until a voice spoke up. Recognising the voice, everyone groaned.

“Mr Principal, “I demand that you find who stole my daughter's bracelet ASAP! Or your job is on the line, sir…!”

Marinette then quietly left the room and jokingly said to Tikki “Who knew that our mayor could shout like that.”

Tikki then glared at her holder and sternly said. “No time for jokes, we’re going to make things right. Now transform!”

Marinette smiled nervously at Tikki and shouted “Tikki, spots on!”

At the same time in the locker room, Felix had managed to get Plagg out of the bracelet with some help from pepper and Camembert cheese. Knowing he had no time to waste, he quickly transformed into Chat Noir.

=^._.^= ∫

It wasn’t until late at night that everything went back to normal with a slight hiccup from the usual lucky charm item, Chat Noir’s antics and Rogercop firing his handcuffs all over the place.

=^._.^= ∫

The next day, the twins were seen together and with happy smiles on their faces as Adrien was allowed to go back to school after Gabriel received a call from the mayor telling him about where the bracelet was all along. All’s well that ends well as Roger got promoted to lieutenant and Nathaniel’s parents were coming over for dinner over the weekend.

#a03 fanfic #alternate universe #fanfiction.net #miraculos ladybug #twins #adrien x nathaniel #felix x marinette #Adrinath

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a-mirror-of-memories · 4 years

Text

Ml prompts (salt edition)

As I promised, this are just some of the plots for fics that I been thinking, a few for a while, others today or this week. Not all of them involve Lila, and even in those she’s not always the focus (Not all of them can be considered ‘salt’ exactly, while others can be labeled as ‘actions have consequences’).

In case anyone want to use them this are the rules (I can made them since this are my ideas):

First of all I want to be tagged for the original idea.

No OOC or bashing of any character (except Gabriel).

No Alya salt unless it’s minimum and only if she’s redeemed at the end. She already gets more than enough hate from the fandom.

Other than that, please refrain of using any of the tropes mentioned in this post:

Max has a crush on Lila, that’s why he keeps believing everything she says (I thought this long before the twitter comment; besides it says that Max’s asexual, not aromatic).

Kim wants to be supporting since she’s his best friend’ first love, even if he doesn’t believe all of her tales (he’s not ruining his chances to become an Olympic medalist following a training regimen that Lila insist ‘was created for my great uncle, a platinum medalist’).

Alix’s getting sick of Lila, if she wanted to hear some self-insert bad fanfic she would spend more time with her brother.

Juleka wants to believe Lila and follows her advices about 'how to be a good model’ until her family intervenes.

After getting several comments complaining of how the Ladyblog’s really unorganized, Alya finally decide to create a side blog (Miracutales) for all the fan-arts and fanfics links her followers keep sending her, and with Nora’s help she spends a whole afternoon fixing her blog. When Lila’s finally exposed the blogger freaks out until her sister comments “Wait, that interview? I send it to your fanfic blog ages ago”.

Lila going on and on to Mylene about a movie actor the other admires, how they’re 'like this’ and that 'I can introduce you to him, he thinks of me as his niece’. Meanwhile the rainbow haired girl’s just nodding with a forced smile while the Italian keep spewing bullshit about her favorite theater actress.

Nino barging into Marinette’s room dragging his little brother, saying that she needed to watch over him on his place since he has a date with Alya. Cue to Alya clearing her throat from the other side of the room, where they were working on a school project.

Lila stole Nathaniel’s sketchbook the day before an important meeting and hid it in Marinette’s locker. Ignoring almost the whole class insistence that she didn’t do it, that anyone could’ve put it in there since there’s no locks, he grabbed her own sketchbook from her bag and ripped it into pieces to everyone’s horror. Marc saw this and he’s akumatized; once it’s all over he still ends their partnership*

*Although cruel, I don’t believe that this is so out of character for Nathaniel. He already has proven to have serious anger issues in Reverser and Evilustrador (While I don’t hold him responsible for what he did under Gabriel’s control, comparing him to other akumas wanting to get revenge of Chloe it’s worrying how much pleasure he seemed to find while tormenting her).

Adrien keep blowing off plans to hang out with his friends to go away as Chat Noir, using the excuse that his father keep adding things to his schedule. One day after he canceled once again, saying that he has a last minute photo shoot, the boys are hanging out in the park where they cross with Vincent. He tells them that he’s the only photograph that Gabriel Agreste trust to work with his son, and that Mr. Agreste was away on a trip for the weekend so Adrien’s schedule was pretty much free until his father came back.

It’s election time again and the Mayor’s opposition has a new slogan: “If he can’t even control his daughter, how can we trust him to protect this city best interest?”

Someone as a joke proposed Xavier Ramier (Mr. Pidgeon) as Mayor. He won.

Felix GV returns and once again pretends to be his cousin. He’s dragged into a photo shoot with Lila; he may be a bastard who hates his uncle and he may be annoyed with Adrien but he still has standards.

With the end of the school year near Alya’s just relieved that since they’ll start Lycée they wouldn’t have to deal with Chloe and Bustier (with her fairytales for assignments) ever again. Until a conversation with Marinette.

“What do you mean we would have Bustier again next year? We’re done with Francoise Dupond! She was your teacher for five years in a row*?! That woman is an ELEMENTARY SCHOOL TEACHER??!”

*Until Chat Blanc Marinette’s been in Chloe class for five years now, at least four of them with Bustier according to picture’s day. Their class’ in middle school a.k.a three years so…well, that explains a lot about her teaching methods.

Marinette decides to let go of her crush on Adrien (not bashing), and with Alya supporting her choice (even if she doesn’t totally agree with giving up) Rose becomes the new captain of the Adrienette ship; trying to get them together against her friend wishes.

After discovering Hawk Moth’s identity Marinette decides she’ll never be like him and toss aside her dream of be a famous fashion designer. She either finds a new dream or simply opens just a small store away from the spotlight, with sporadic commission for people she’s close to.

At last, I like to call this section’s “Responsible Adults (Are trying their best)”

Marinette doesn’t know every celebrity under the sun, only Jagged, Nadja and maybe Clara. Gina Dupain, world traveler extraordinary, however has a rare gift when it comes to meeting new people by chance without knowing who they are*.

(“I sat beside this guy once in a plane, he was such a charming young man. Here, there’s a pic” “Nonna that was *insert celebrity here*!” “Who?”)

*This in the only kind of celebrity insert I would aprove.

Surprise inspection from the French educational department (whatever it’s called), some heads are going to roll.

Officer Raincomprix at first was happy that Sabrina stopped hanging out with Chloe and made a real friend; then he realized that this girl was even worse than the Mayor’s daughter.

The school nurse accidentally cause an international affair after calling the Italian Embassy asking why the Ambassador’s daughter didn’t have the proper vaccines for all the travels she keep claiming to have made.

After seeing Nathalie faint in the middle of a car drive, a worried Gorilla brings her to the ER. While checking her vitals (she’s still unconscious) a nurse accidentally knocks her brooch out of her coat, and while putting it back a strange creature materialize in front of them.

“Any of you has Ladybug in speed dial?”

One of the Agreste servants (let’s be honest, how else would that place stay clean) discovers Hawk Moth secret lair.

“I don’t get paid enough for this”.

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misstvirus · 3 years

Text

** RESIDENT EVIL VILLAGE SPOILERS **

I decided to put this on tumblr so I could hide spoilers from Twitter and full explain why I gave Resident Evil 8 the score 5/10

These are my opinions and my personal review of Resident Evil Village. Everyone is entitled to their opinions and I am in no way saying that anyone’s experiences or enjoyment of the game are invalid.

Please excuse me - I had a hard time trying to put my thoughts in order. This is a game summary and commentary after the first few paragraphs.

I first discuss the graphics, music, etc but it turns into me basically explaining the plot so I could express my dismay at the end. Skip to the last few paragraphs to read my mental nerdy breakdown.

The gameplay, graphics and mechanics are perfect. Each installment since of series since Resident Evil 7 - has improved. The game mechanics while in combat such as switching weapons, healing and guarding are smooth, it’s damn near perfect. The Duke brought a lot of nostalgia and memories of Resident Evil 4’s Merchant. I enjoyed being able to interact to upgrade weapons, buy supplies and sell treasures. The games over all aesthetic, atmosphere and attention to detail. Each location was beautiful and you can see the love, sweat and dedication put into the game. The music is there, it is eerie at times but it’s not as memorable as other installments of the game. Resident Evil 7 had its featured title song, “Go Tell Aunt Rhody” - Resident Evil Village’s “Yearning for Dark Shadows” was not as heavily featured and did not get the hype like it’s predecessor.

Resident Evil Village had a good story (please note this is my thought strictly AS A REVITALIZED RE GAME BEFORE THE CHRIS REDFIELD SEGMENT). The story starts by continuing with Ethan and Mia Winters after the events of Resident Evil 7. I knew Capcom moved in a different direction and accepted that as long time RE Junkie that although it’s from the same universe - they would not be the same type of games. Chris Redfield’s end game appearance in RE7 and a few Easter eggs were the only MAIN (not DLC content) links to the previous RE installments. The new set of villains and interesting tie-ins to village folklore story was a great way to foreshadow the events to come. The village and story behind Mother Miranda and her reasoning for creating the big baddies because wanting to bring back her dead child were good and had this been a stand alone or continuation WITHOUT TYING THE GAME INTO THE RE UNIVERSE I would have liked it fully.

The game starts with Ethan and Mia Winters, a new baby, Rose and are Having marital issues not dealing with Louisiana/RE7 events and Chris Redfield shows up and kills “Mia”. Chris’s team takes the baby and Ethan and knocks him out. When Ethan wakes up in wreckage of a van, without his baby and dead drivers. As Ethan wanders into the woods and makes his way to the village. He discovers something is killing the people and meets up with a group of people who worship Mother Miranda and quickly die by monsters. These monsters are called “lycans” who are products/monsters of the Cadou mold similar/same thing in RE7. Ethan finds himself apart of weird meeting of all five villains - who stole baby Rose and want do some weird shit.

Tada! Ethan has escaped and ends up in Lady Alcina Dimitrescu or “Tall Lady” “Vampire Mommy” castle. You are confronted by her and her three daughters Bela, Cassandra and Daniela.

Let me step in to rustle the jimmies and ruffle the feathers of the Lady D hype group. What you see in the previews is what you get. No more, no less! There is nothing special and there are no redeeming qualities or mentions past notes in game files of Lady D outside your castle encounter. The story isn’t based around her, she’s just a tiny part in a larger story plot 1 of 5 villains/baddies. The daughters are overly sexual and have the most cringe worthy dialog. I love me some sexy characters and villains but the daughters were just so cringe. They could’ve AMPED up the horror with them and created a stronger scare factor but dropped the fucking ball. They were not creepy or scary and brought nothing to the story with delivering lines about wanting to “consume Ethan’s manflesh” “not stale as mother said - tastes so good.” Also to be noted they were not actually vampires but bioweapons. Lady D being a good result to the mold “Cadou” and the daughters the result of the Cadou and mixing of insects. You kill the daughters, get chased by Lady D who eventually mutates into a flying tentacle bat-dragon and it’s done, she gone. Sorry to fuckboys who thought she was bigger player.

After Ethan beats Lady D, he grabs a yellow flask that’s apparently filled with the juice and parts of baby Rose - and each of villains has one of these baby-juice boxes. Ethan will have to collect them all to be able to put Rose back together.

Next visit is House Beneviento. This was the scariest of all five villains and village locations in my review of the game. It reminded me of a Silent Hill installment less a Resident Evil installment - the use of light, sound and overall paranormal factor did bring in a successful horrifying portion of the game . The mutated baby chase was comical yet creepy. You have to hide to escape it and you ended up playing hide and seek with possessed dolls. The entirety of House Beneviento will definitely give you an uneasy feeling. Donna, the woman controlling a doll named Angie is another baddie who you later learn is mentally unstable and uses her abilities to manipulate plants - to cause hallucinations to create the creepy doll house scenario. (Oof it’s hard for me to stay on track). Part 2 of 4 of Baby Rose - which yes it what your game objective says.

Next Moreau, a mutated fish man - gives Ethan the Resident Evil 4 and Resident Evil 5 game play feel - having to complete actions while some oversized bioweapon is looming around and can take you out with a misstep, like falling in the water or moving too slowly. Moreau did not gain any abilities with the Cadou mold, basically his body wasn’t compatible and he just mutates uncontrollably. Mentally slow, weak and kind of a sad story. Ethan runs into Chris Redfield who tells him to stay out of it and than runs away. Ethans fights Moreau and gets another baby juice jar.

Next Ethan faces off and explores a laboratory with Karl Heisenberg - a bioweapon who can manipulate metal (think a less cool and weakly motivated Magneto). He one of the last big baddies - and motivated by being essentially rejected by Mother Miranda. He is the most stable reaction to the Cadou mold. Before Ethan and Heisenberg face off - Chris Redfield comes in - to reveal he was not the bad guy Ethan thought in the beginning of the game. Mia wasn’t Mia but in fact Mother Miranda in disguise- who was attempting to steal the baby Rose which she ended up doing anyway because Chris’s team wrecked with the baby. At this point I’m say FINE WHATEVER, I guess this works

Chris goes into kill Mother Miranda, we the audience discover the BSAA is now not what is used to be. Chris isn’t affiliating with them and his team hides away from them as they attack. BSAA gets struck down attempting to kill Mother Miranda’s mutation - a megacyte squishy organ (that’s keeping her alive and immortal). Chris puts a massive bomb on big Miranda squishy thing and discovers that Lady Dimitrescu, Karl Heisenberg, Moreau and Donna Beneviento are all attempts to create a perfect vessel to bring back her own dead child Eva, who died in 1912 of the Spanish flu. It is revealed Eveline, the RE7 little girl mold baddie wasn’t another failed attempt. Miranda has turned baby Rose into baby juice to use with the Cadou mold in a ceremony to bring her dead child back.

AND drum roll please - we find out Ozwell Spencer, founder of Umbrella and the progenitor virus the big Daddy of it all was in cahoots with Miranda at some point in his youth and supported her crazy ass research but had his own stuff going on. WHY?! WHO KNOWS? NOT ME! WHY WAS THIS PUT IN THE GAME. To piss me off? Yes. Chris has also discovered Mia is still alive in jail cell for what reason? who knows? And Mia reveals that Ethan is special!

Cue black screen, Ethan awakes to see to Eveline - the mold baddie from RE7. Eveline explains - that Ethan has been dead and died back during the events of RE7. Jack Baker had killed him and dragged him into the house. So he was dead the entirety of RE7 - That explains why Ethan is constantly dismembered, beaten and walking the mold keeps him alive. Ethan will not survive much longer because his missing heart but is determined to bring back his baby. Weakly he carries himself to fight Mother Miranda with Chris. Mother Miranda performs her ceremony with the baby juice boxes and out comes not Eva (her baby) but Ethan’s baby Rose.

They fight and Ethan kills Miranda, carrying Rose off to Chris but that missing heart is the end of Ethan so he takes the trigger for the squishy bomb and pushes Chris away and sacrifices himself for his daughter. Chris boards a helicopter with Mia and baby and the body of a BSAA solider. Ethan blows himself and the Miranda squishy up. The BSAA soldier turns out to be a bioweapon and Mia is distraught at Ethan being for reals dead and Chris is annoyed and directs the pilot for BSAA Europe HQ. Credits Roll, now we see Adult Rose (baby juice reborn as mold human) visiting her Dads grave it’s apparent Chris has been training her and her bodyguard (?) pulls up and they argue and she goes all combative on him. It’s implied she’s not normal since she was DUH she was turned into baby juice and put back together with Cadou mold they drive off - apparently you can see a ghostly Ethan in photo mode - I don’t know I don’t give AF enough about The Winters family and this game at this point

The End

5/10 - Story (read below)

9/10 - Everything else

- Katie’s Dismay and Final Review and Rating-

Graphics: 9/10

Setting: 8/10

Music: 6/10

Game Mechanics: 10/10

Story: (pre Chris Redfield tie in): 7/10

Story: (post Chris Redfield) 4/10

As a modern game, it was great, exceptional. It checks all the classic horror boxes but isn’t the scariest entry, Resident Evil 7 was a much more scary game. The story is why my rating is slow and it’s based on my biases and years of following the story.

STOP! Don’t want to hear my angry ranting? SKIP THE REST

THE ANGER OF a grown ass Resident Evil Fan.

They should’ve omitted the entire BSAA story and BSAA bioweapon-man and not included those notes about Spencer and Umbrella. This game was solid as a next installment and sequel to Resident Evil 7 until they decided they wanted to tie the original Resident Evil storylines into the new story.

When Capcom decided to breakdown and rebuild the franchise, it was a blow because so many storylines were unfinished. I understand they needed to keep evolving and I was blown away by the result. RE7 was not and did not feel like an old RE Game but it was new and it brought back the horror and fear the RE Games early installments were known for. A new RE for a new generation!

But TO ME PERSONALLY - The positive thoughts and opinions I had of RE7 are sullied by Resident Evil Village. Why try to tie it in as an after thought after such a successful overhaul? It’s a slap in the face! Capcom has created some of the best characters in video game stories just to say fuck them for this overhaul but WAIT WE REALLY LIKE CHRIS AND THE BSAA STORY LINE LET’S BRING IN THE OLD STORY NOW.

Fucking NO.

I don’t know what’s worse reading that fucking note from Spencer or the BSAA bullshit.

So now one has to say... WHAT happened to all of the characters who worked for BSAA or worked with affiliates of the BSAA? Chris goes on his own way - Now what? What happened??? There’s nothing explaining what happened between RE5 and RE6 to RE7! They failed to create that bridge. If they had established ANYTHING in RE7 it would be easier for me to swallow.

If you want to overhaul and change the series FINE but don’t back peddle now. Don’t try to throw it the last few minutes of the game with some lazy writing and a vague cliff hanger just leaving it like this.

And of course one could think - “maybe they will make a new game, maybe another sequel?”..... BUT HAVE Y’ALL seen what’s happened at the end of every RE game since RE4???? We are finally getting a Netflix series in 2021 to fill the time after RE4!!! That was 16 YEARS ago! So how can crazy ass fans like myself really expect them to fix the plot holes?!

My theory is that - in between RE7 and RE village They were working on the RE2 Remake and the RE3 Remake and it was if someone at Capcom finally asked - “If all these new RE players are going to play RE village - don’t we need a way to connect these stories????”

And someone jumped up in a conference room and replied. “FUCK IT LETS JUST TIE IN SPENCER AND THE BSAA IN THE LAST 10 MINUTES!”

I have cried, laughed and loved these games my entire life. Some of my major life events happened because of this series! I have followed every game, collected merchandise, gotten tattoos and met the most amazing people because our mural obsession over this series. That’s why it hurts me that’s why I’m tear it apart so viciously and also why I keep playing. There’s always hope that someone will fix the plot holes and finish the stories that lured in the older RE fans and I will always hold Capcom to a high standard and expect them to do right by the fans. I’m not speaking for ALL older RE Fans or ALL fans and I’m definitely not gatekeeping the fandom. This is how I feel - I’m grateful there is a new generation breathing life into RE but I’m screaming a warning - BUCKLE UP BUTTERCUPS - there’s a strong chance your favorite characters new or old aren’t going to get an ending or be reduced to a brief snippet in a file you may not not find.

ANYWAYS

Happy to those who loved it, condolences to those who are pissed off like myself

I’m annoyed but I’ll power through!

Happy 25th Anniversary to my longest obsession!

RE Verse coming in the summer, the Netflix series and the remake Live Action Movies.

HERE’S TO RESIDENT EVIL!

#resident evil #biohazard #resident evil village #resident evil 8 #my opinion #video game #capcom #spoilers #resident evil spoilers

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lobanri · 3 years

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i wrote a -shitty, tbh, but it wouldn’t stop haunting my shower time- richie tozier’s stand up post-canon thing, on a everyone lives au. i lost the thread a bit near the end, so i’m putting it up here and maybe i’ll post it on ao3 at some point. enjoy.

So I’m guessing- and I’m probably right, which is decidedly not how my guesses tend to go- that a lot of you came here to see if I could offer a better explanation than the tabloids about what happened last show, because (voice changes to a higher pitched, mocking voice): ‘Richie, what the genuine fuck was that’, (voice switches back.) right?

Well gee! Am I ever here to answer. And also maybe to give a stand-up performance whose entire script I threw out in favour of, like, maybe four jokes I scraped together with what’s left of my brain.

But! Explanation first.

Okay. (short pause.) So. Imagine you’re me, the fantastic -that’s a joke in itself, right there- Richie ‘Trashmouth’ Tozier. You’re about to go out and perform in front of, okay, maybe not that many people, but still a good number, and you’re like, only a bit nervous. And then.

You get a phone call.

It’s an unknown number. It says so, right there on the screen of your phone that’s all smudged and disgusting and maybe a little bit cracked ‘cause you keep dropping it doing dumb shit.

(again, his voice changes to a higher pitched, mocking voice)

“Oh Richie, was it someone you knew?” (voice switches back.) Of course not, dumbass, that’s why I said unknown. Duh.

But on with the tale.

Now, am I the type of person that answers unknown numbers? Normally, no. If your phone got stolen and you’ve ever called me from a burrowed phone about it, now you know why nobody picked up. But remember, I was about to go out into the level of hell that is an audience- not that I don't love it, I do, but being stared, and occasionally laughed at for around an hour is not what most people find a relaxing afternoon experience.

So I picked up. Thought it’d maybe be a wrong number that would leave the other person feeling very awkward and me only slightly less so. Maybe I’d get an idea for a joke, who knows.

Suffice to say, given the whole clusterfuck that was my last show, it wasn’t a wrong number.

I pick up. I go, “Hello, who is this?”, because that’s what you say when you answer a call.

The other dude goes “Hi Richie, it’s Mike.”

In my head, I go ‘oh’. So first, apparently this is not a wrong number! Second, Mike? I don’t know any Mikes, who’s Mike?

Third, I go “Oh, shit.”

Now, have you ever noticed that a lot of comedians talk about their childhoods a lot? I’ve realized that they do this for one of three reasons; either their parents are funny, they had very fun childhoods, or they had a lot of therapy. I don’t talk about my childhood because none of those applied to me, and also because I repressed like a full 90% of it from trauma. I now have a therapist, which means I can tell you people some of it. Also because most of it came back from repression-land right there and then, because turns out I do in fact know a Mike!

Mike my childhood friend! From my childhood gang!

...The same childhood I happily repressed for twenty seven years, in fact.

Mostly from trauma.

Now you might realize that it’s literally two minutes until I have to go out in front of all you lovely judging strangers who have expectations of me already!

I certainly did. So did my agent- lovely man, genuinely hates me so much- who nevertheless had to send me out like some poor lost lamb sent to be sacrificed at the altar. So I come out- not in that way, but keep tuned to that-

Oh wow that was loud. We’ll get to that, don’t you worry. Now that’s going to be fun. If you haven’t seen Twitter, have fun figuring this out.

But let’s try to keep this mess chronological -big word for me, I know, I stole it off some other guy.

I come out, and then I can’t remember my joke, and I can’t remember my name, and I don’t remember where I am, but turns out I can remember the time my friends and I found a corpse!

So anyway, I puke on stage.

Glamorous way to end a show, I know, but in my defense I was pretty busy.

I’d like to make a segue here- who here grew up in a small town?

Yeah? Okay, this entire bit is for y’all. The rest of you big city folk can just check your phones or whatever.

So I grew up in a small town in Maine, called Derry. Pretty quaint, didn’t have much, there was one arcade, one pharmacy owned by a pedophile, one old abandoned -extremely haunted- crack house, and like a couple tiny stores. My friends and I used to hang out at the quarry and at that same old house, which was cool at the time and gross in hindsight.

I’ll tell you what it’s most known for; it’s the child murder capitol of the entire United States.

Oh, that’s some silence there. Are you perhaps uncomfortable? Maybe wondering if you heard that right? I’ll repeat it louder then.

IT WAS THE CHILD. MURDER. CAPITOL.

OF THE ENTIRE UNITED STATES.

AND I GREW UP THERE. A CHILD.

Is it clearer now why I repressed that entire experience?

So. Derry. Terrible, terrible, racist, homophobic, sexist Derry. Would I have loved to never go back? Yeah, of course. Who would?

This idiot. And his entire gang of childhood friends. Because Mike called us and went ‘Hey, could you guys come back? It’s important.’ And we went, because Mikey literally never asks for shit, so clearly this was going to be terrible. If Mike was on fire, I’m pretty sure he’d take care of it and then never mention it again.

I’ve mentioned the others a couple of times before- of course, Mike, who’s a librarian in Derry- or was, but that’s later. But, there are seven of us in our little Loser’s Club! That is the actual name, by the way. Seven Losers.

Even if Stan made us think that was wrong, because while my reaction to remembering Derry was to puke, his was to fake his death. Yes. If you can believe it, he literally fucking faked his death to get out of that reunion.

I’ll move on a bit so I don’t spend the rest of the show dissing Stan the Man and his extreme as fuck reactions- would you believe that this man is an accountant? Like, what the fuck? Now whenever I see an accountant I wonder if they’re the type of person that would fake their death to get out of things and it’s fucking with my head every time I have to go to the bank.

Okay. Seven- six not counting me, we’ve talked about Mike, and I’ve already said why Stan wasn’t there- we’re left with the weirdest group you’ve seen; Ben Hanscom, or Handsome really, that man got so hot, who’s a famous architect, Beverly Marsh, Bevs, very famous fashion designer -hell yeah she is actually my friend, I know, it’s weird- William Denbrough, Big Bill himself, horror author with terrible endings, leader of out weird gang, and last but the very opposite of least Eddie Kapsbrak, risk analyzer, the most germaphobic person I’ve met, who also wore fanny packs while we were kids. The last part tells you very little about him but I feel like I have to mention it from time to time, because he’s hot and all now but in my head he always had a fanny pack and it freaks me out a bit to see him without one. I also made ‘your mom’ jokes at him all the time, mostly for attention but also because sometimes he’d snap back and just verbally gut me like a fish, and I? Loved that shit.

For those of you that look like you just came to a realization, yes. You’d be right. But we’re just gonna ignore it for now, because some of the others didn’t get it yet, and I’m not gonna hold your hand until you do, I feel like I’ve dropped enough hints already.

Where was I? Oh, yeah.

They’re all hot and I hate it. How come they get to grow up and get muscles and I get to grow up to look like a beanstalk with some fucking bug-eyes and a shitty party city wig? I used to call Eddie “Eddie Spaghetti”, but then turns out that the actual noddle here was me all along.

Well. I’ll get the reunion out of the way and move to the important part; what did Mike call us there for? The answer may not surprise you, given that we were in fact in Derry, but guess what? If you thought ‘child murder’ you win nothing at all, but you’d be right. There was in fact a serial killer! Who was, uh, also… a cannibal.

Terrible, right?

But you’d think ‘this sounds weird’, right? Some unknown dude is killing and eating people, yes, but what does that have to do with lil ol’ me?

Now’d be the time to point out that Bill’s little brother Georgie disappeared twenty seven years previous and turned out to have been literally murdered and possibly eaten along with like, some other six or seven people. And at the time, Big Bill made us all go along to go look for him. In the sewers. While we were also kids. Y’know, like those other kids that got killed.

Big Bill was charismatic, but that doesn’t mean he was the wisest guy, okay. And we were also dumb and young, so that was pretty much all it took.

Thing is that we, uh, …did actually end up finding a serial killer in the sewers. So.

Who was it? Henry Bowers. Our middle school bully. To those true crime fans that recognize the name, yeah, that Bowers.

It didn’t turn out to be that much of a surprise that our bully was the dude killing people, actually, because he was the most fucked-up kid I ever met. He broke Eds’s arm and tried to carve his name on Ben, which is genuinely fucking nuts, right? Like, what? The everliving fuck? I think he liked to kick puppies.

Now, this time around, you’d think it was some fucked up copycat or something? Nope. Dude escaped to try again, this time dressed as a clown.

You think I’m joking here? He literally dressed as a clown to kill people. I could not begin to tell you why.

He can’t tell you, either, because he’s currently, uh, sort of dead. As in, someone buried an axe in his spine and he died.

In my defense-

(louder)

he was trying to kill Mike and you’ve already heard that I’d go back into Derry for him, so.

If you’d wondered why I came back really late, yeah, that was part of it.

The other part is that before dying he managed to stab Eddie Spaghetti in the face and make us go into that one old ass, extremely haunted crack house- don’t ask, I don’t know either- in which an entire beam fell on him. I’m genuinely baffled at how this didn’t happen earlier, because this was literally our childhood hangout spot. But karma or fate or whatever caught up with us, so it did.

By the way, he’s okay now. We all thought he was gonna die first, of course, because how the hell else do you react when a dude’s been impaled right in front of you? He didn’t. But when we all thought he was gonna die in front of me, holding his hand -him included- he looked at me in the eye and, with all the strength his failing body could muster up, he said:

“I fucked your mom.”

So does it come as a surprise to anyone that we’re dating now?

#reddie #my snippets #my fics #richie tozier #richie tozier's stand up #i'm proud of this one #it was written almost entirely yesterday evening while i waited for the clothes to dry #think i'll post it on ao3 actually #i've read way too many of these not to want to contribute a bit

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toomanyandomestocount · 3 years

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Not in the kitchen

2022

Daya was in the kitchen furiously going through recipes searching for the perfect one because it was her and her girlfriends one month anniversary and she decided to make a home cooked meal for their date . The only problem was that this was her first time cooking and she had no idea what to do.

Finally she found the perfect recipe. A delicious sounding white sauce pasta with some garlic bread and some chili garlic bites all made from scratch. So she got to work, putting the butter in the pan and chopping the garlic and the vegetables while boiling the pasta.

Just as she got done with the pasta her doorbell rang indicating Nisha was already at the door so she shut off the flame and went to greet her girl. The moment she entered flowers and coca cola she brought with herself were pushed into Daya’s hands. Pressing a kiss on her cheek she scrunched up her nose sniffing the air. After a moment she turned to Daya and asked with a shocked face that melted into an amused smile ‘Did you cook?’

Sheepishly Daya shrugged her shoulders looking down and said ‘ I wanted to do something special for our anniversary.’

Grinning from ear to ear Nisha went up to her and lifted her head while wrapping her hands around Daya’s waist and kissed her on the cheek and whispered ‘You are adorable.’ She turned around moving towards the kitchen ,exited to see what her girlfriend had come up with, pulling at Daya’s sleeves ‘Come on let me help . What are you making? ‘

Daya immediately pulled her back ‘No! You go sit in the living room and wait I want to make it on my own it’s my gift for you.’

‘Ok but at least let me be in the kitchen with you’ Nisha negotiated.

‘Fine! But don’t distract me.’ came a huffed reply. As they made their way to the kitchen Daya put the flowers in a vase and the cola in the fridge.

She turns on the stove and starts working on the garlic bread. Daya puts the bread on the pan flipping it every few seconds, so completely focused in trying to not burn the bread that she misses Nisha quickly whipping out her phone and snapping a picture of her and sneakily posts it on twitter with a caption ‘ Dayas first ever cooking experience ;)’

Once the food was all done they sat down in the living room and put on a movie that they completely ignored as they sat there cuddling and eating. Daya took the fork and took a bite and shuddered. It was disgusting so she looked up at Nisha and asked ‘Do you like it?’ with a voice full of hope , eyes wide and innocent. Nisha melted inside and she just could not handle seeing a disappointed look in Daya when she tried so hard . So instead mustered up the best smile and said ‘It is amazing babe’. And they spent the rest of the night sitting there eating cuddling and laughing.

2032

Nisha and Daya have been together ten years and married five. They are at the table discussing what to make for the get together they are hosting that all their friends are attending and they had been bickering for over an hour and still had not come to a conclusion when finally Nisha relented and agreed on a simple pasta salad , cheese sticks and lasagna with ice cream for dessert.

They went over to the grocery store where they bickered a little more over the ingredients. Which went something like ‘Nisha cheddar is the superior cheese. ‘ ‘Daya we cannot make cheese sticks from cheddar so keep the mozzarella that I know you stole back in the cart.’

(huffing)

‘ huh Fine I will. I don’t know why I married you in the first place ’ Daya said with a pout. To which Nisha replied with rolling her eyes at the tantrum her childish wife was throwing in the middle of the store ‘ because you love me you absolute nincompoop’

And the instant retort was ‘ Not right now I don’t’

‘ Shut up. You love me.’ A highly amused Nisha told her wife pretending to be annoyed while secretly loving how her wife can look so cute while being so utterly ridicules.

Daya knew that her current tactic was not working so she switched it up ‘Unfortunately I do. So…. Can we take the cheddar . Pretty please.’ She pleaded fluttering her eyelashes . Knowing her wife can’t say no to her, she internally cheered as Nisha sighed completely aware she was going to comply. ‘Fine I’ll make some for you separately But keep the mozzarella for our friends. ‘ she said as Daya ran to check out grinning widely.

Nisha stood there for a few seconds, just smiling looking at her wife who was chatting with the cashier as they checked their stuff out.

They took the stuff back home, put it away and got ready for bed.

Nisha sighed while they were cuddling and said ‘I am dreading the morning. There is so much to do and I don’t have a lot of time we need to clean the house put the glassware away , decorate, and I have to cook so many things ‘

Daya looked up and said ‘Don’t worry honey, I promise I will help in the kitchen.’. Nisha just looked over to her in horror and said firmly ‘Absolutely not. You can do whatever you want but you are not stepping a foot inside my kitchen, I can already picture what a disaster that would be.’

Daya looked at her and said a little confused ‘But I made you that pasta on our anniversary and you said it was amazing ‘

Nisha smiled sheepishly a little apologetic, feeling slightly guilty and said ‘ I didn’t want to make you sad , you looked so hopeful and cute I could not break your heart like that, and you put so much effort into it so I said I liked it’

Daya stared at her mouth agape stuttering a little trying to look angry and shocked , but suddenly started laughing and with a lot of effort calmed down and admitted with a smile that she didn’t like it either.

They looked at each other and burst into another round of laughter and discussed all that was wrong with that dish.

#lgbtqplus #lgbtq+#lesbian #oneshots #fluff #wlw #gxg #my fic #gay #cute #happily married #first date

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lukkerichardson-blog · 3 years

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Identity and Representation within ethnic minorities

Introduction:

Throughout this rich media essay I will be looking into the identity and representation of minority groups in TV and film. My case study will be “Get Out” which was written and directed by Jordan Peele.”Get Out” was a cultural landmark in cinema as it was one of the first horror films to feature a predominantly black cast and be written and directed by a black man. It also won several awards and received critical acclaim. The identity and representation of ethnic minorities has been an ever changing and evolving debate ever since the beginning of cinema. Directors like Jordan peele have strived to make change within the paradigm in regards to the way ethnic minorities are portrayed. This is evident in his 2017 film “Get Out” when the main character Chris Washington played by (Daniel kaluuya) Meets his white girlfriend (Rose armitage) played by (Allison Williams)’s family in suburban America and things get strange when Daniel kaluuyas character Chris finds out that his girlfriend Rose and her family have been secretly plotting to detain him and switch bodies with him because they believe that the black body is more superior to theirs. Jordan Peele wrote the story this was as a result of a belief that some people hold that white people are superior to black people. It is a reverse of eugenics, as in the film the grandfather (Gordon Greene) played by (John Wilmot) tells a story that Jesse Owens beat him in the 1936 olympics and therefore believes that black people are superior Jordan peele wrote the story like this so that it would show black people being the “superior” race which is a far cry to what most of history has been about.

Representation

“Get Out” is an interesting case study as it is a predominantly black cast, not only in terms of the writer and director Jordan Peele, but even the story is about black struggle and the objectification of black culture and identity, Jordan Peele tackles issues around the subject of racism. Since get out release audiences have seen a wider range of diversity both behind and infant of the camera. More black led projects have been headed; for example Peeles second directorial debut “US” and HBO’s “lovecraft, country” maybe these new releases have demonstrated that Hollywood is becoming more diverse and accepting of change. Representation within the genre of horror has improved dramatically. The TV and film industry has always been under fire because alot of people feel that the industry is not diverse enough, it has always casted white people in the industry instead of non white actors for years. You can see this in ever single aspect of production from the cast to the crew, you can also see it in the nominations for awards, and who wins them predominantly. Which is why “Get Out” was such a huge breath of fresh air. Although the representation of the black community has gotten better the path that has had to be taken there has been hard. Minority groups have been shown in a horrific way for hundreds of years. You can date it back hundreds of years to even when they were doing plays with packed out audiences using white actors to dress up in blackface to mock black people. They were painted with comically large mouths with huge red lips and large noses. They would even prance around the stage and intentionally use these characters to be the dumb stupid ones for comedic effect, in this time it was completely socially acceptable to do these things and was the norm. In Peter pan ( 1953 ) there is a part in the film with native Americans who are portrayed as villains and have skin that was very bright and red and are actually called “Red Skins”. The reason for this Is because Hollywood was controlled

by white people and all writers and directors of films at the time were all white, who were extremely proud of their country and thought that native Americans were villains. A genre that was popular at the time was westerns, which always featured white cowboys as heroes and native Americans as villains, even though the fact is, is that white people took over America from native Americans and slaughtered and stole from them. They were even portrayed as the villains up until extremely recently, in Twilight (2008) all the werwolves are portrayed as indigenous people and were all portrayed as uneducated.

Also another problem with representation within the film industry was the award ceremonies. In the nomination process it is still to this day mostly white actors and creatives that get nominated for awards. It even can be seen as recently as 2015 and 2016, where there was huge unrest and a big conversation was started on industry racism and systematic oppression. For 2 years straight every single actor that was nominated for best lead and supporting role were white. Take note that the last time something like this had happened was in 1998, so this did raise the question. Are we going back to old racist ways? Twitter exploded and the hashtag #OscarsSoWhite was trending for days. Because of this scandal alot of the worlds most famous actors and creatives boycotted the ceremony Spike lee took to instagram to announce that he and his wife could not attend because they “Cannot support it” Jada pinkest smith and will smith both said that they would not attend until the issue was resolved. But even when the most recent 2020 Oscar nominations were announced there was a huge backlash because yet again there was a huge obvious hole in the nominations, all best supporting actress role nominations were white. Alot of people believed that Lupita Nyong’os role in US, yet another Jordan Peele classic was definitely worthy of an Oscar nomination. However alot of the public and industry workers feel like she was robbed of this because of systematic oppression. Thankfully films with black cast and crew members have been gaining the attention and success they deserve. Black Panther (2018) now holds the record for highest grossing solo superhero film so far. In 2013 the first ever African American won best adapted screen play for 12 years a slave, his name was John Ridley. The best film 2019 was the “Green Book” which protagonist was mahershala Ali. Also in 2019 “Blackkklansman” won best adapted screenplay which was directed by Spike Lee who many people believe has been snubbed many times within the awards ceremony.

Identity

By now audiences know that Get out is more than your average horror film. Jordan Peele has expressed that Get Out portrays how racism feels to a black man. I agree with this and I also feel that Get Out portrays the complexities of racial identity. Get Out shows us that we still have a long road ahead when it comes to understanding each other. In Get Out all the black characters that’s bodies have been stolen go to a place called the sunken place where they float in an endless void, where the body is paralysed but the mind is completely conscious I think that this may be what Jordan Peele is talking about when he talks about what it feels like to be apart of a minority group. Maybe this is him trying to convey that black voices are not heard in Hollywood or in any walk of life at all, and that the void is like being black because it feels like there is nothing you can do. I also think that the sunken place would resonate with the black community as if you forget the hypnosis and body swapping, it is realistically a metaphor for how your identity can be lost

because people will solely judge you on race, it is also like you are being controlled and governed by someone who doesn’t really have your best interests at heart, and there isn’t anything you can do about it. Jordan Peele is half black and half white he explained in a 2012 interview that "Being of mixed background, we liken it to walking on a tightrope at different points in our lives. At certain points, it seems like we’re between two worlds, or we’re a part of two worlds, or we question where our world is.”

I also think another issue that we have today with identity when it comes to minority groups is, white washing. White washing is when an original source material, comic, book, film, tv show or any form of media is altered to cast a white character in place of one that is from a minority group. This is very harmful to culture and to basic morals in general as it snubs ethnic minorities of roles that resonate with them in place of a white person so that it can appeal to a more western society. whitewashing goes back to the early 1920’s which was a time where society was far less developed as it was today. There was hardly any equality in the 1920’s between races in America, or any part of the world for that matter. For example in 1915 a film was released called “The Birth of a Nation” directed by D.W Griffith, which by some was well regarded because of the technical cinematography. However he used white actors in black face to portray historical actions of the Klu Klux Klan. Because of this the film is widely recognised to be racist and is greatly criticised. Even up until today there have been so many film adaptations of other original source material from different cultures and created by minority groups that have been capitalised on by Hollywood to appeal to a wider audience, therefore being whitewashed. For example a Japanese Manga titled Death Note was adapted into an animation. Both the animation and the manga features an all asian cast. Hollywood noticed that this was an extremely popular anime series and therefore began production of their own live action version. This version replaced all Japanese characters with all white American ones. Compares to the original source material which is critically acclaimed this live adaptation was universally disliked. Some might say that this is because they have no idea of the source material and don’t understand it because they don’t resonate with it, maybe what makes these intellectual properties so good is because of the culture and the art style behind them. The whole of death note is extremely rooted in asian culture which is why the American version didn’t work. Another quick example of recent times is Johnny Depp in “The Lone Ranger”. He was cast as “Tonto” who is a native american character, obviously Johnny Depp is white. In annihilation Natalie portman and Jeniffer Jason Leigh play characters who in the novel are respectively asian and native american descent.

Finally I would say the history of cinema has been extremely controversial and the issue of diversity has been one if the biggest problems throughout. The lack of ethnic minorities in cinema is astonoshing at times, especially in the early days of cinema. Also the portrayal of minorities when they are casted in media is also extremely unfair, one sided and biased towards a racist agenda. Until this issue has been resolved we will not see minorities being depicted clearly and truthfully in any such forms of media. The small amount of minority directors, screen writers, and all other parts of the creative industry has caused an extremely unbalanced work place where white people will benefit, even if the character they are playing is not white. However even though we have seen an improvement in terms of this issue in some spaces. There still seems to be a lack of representation of non white creatives in the industry and award ceremonies.

Bibliography

Low, E. and Jackson, A., 2020. Black Representation In Hollywood: Is The Industry Finally Listening? - Variety. [online] Variety.com. Available at: <https://variety.com/2020/biz/ features/black-representation-hollywood-inclusion-diversity-entertainment-1234693219/>.

Bakare, L., 2020. Get Out: The Film That Dares To Reveal The Horror Of Liberal Racism In America. [online] the Guardian. Available at: <https://www.theguardian.com/film/2017/ feb/28/get-out-box-office-jordan-peele>.

Variety.com. 2020. Jordan Peele: How 'Get Out' Tackles Systemic Racism As Horror - Variety. [online] Available at: <https://variety.com/2017/film/news/jordan-peele-get-out- systemic-racism-1202604824/>.

Robinson, T., 2020. Get Out Review: A Ruthlessly Smart Racial Send-Up That's Also Terrifying. [online] The Verge. Available at: <https://www.theverge.com/ 2017/2/24/14724404/jordan-peele-get-out-movie-review-race-horror-film>.

Moore, S., 2020. The Oscars Mix-Up Matters Because This Night Was Always About Racial Bias | Suzanne Moore. [online] the Guardian. Available at: <https:// www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2017/feb/27/oscars-mix-up-matters-racial-bias>.

Hiatt, B. and Hiatt, B., 2020. The All-American Nightmares Of Jordan Peele. [online] Rolling Stone. Available at: <https://www.rollingstone.com/movies/movie-features/director- jordan-peele-new-movie-cover-story-782743/>.

Cara, M., 2020. ‘Get Out’ Shows How Being Defined By Your Race Puts Your Own Identity At Risk. [online] Bustle. Available at: <https://www.bustle.com/p/get-out-shows-how-being- defined-by-your-race-puts-your-own-identity-at-risk-41121> [Accessed 18 August 2020].

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