Tumgik
#such a joy to write
breannasfluff · 2 months
Note
Is there going to be tooth rotting fluff (my favorite flavor) in the next story?
Magic 8 ball says...
Yes - definitely
Tumblr media
7 notes · View notes
miltheperson · 11 months
Note
I REMEMBERED!
Demon- puppet reader-
I imagine them to be hecka tall, or around Julie’s height-
Tail long- horns on fleek- (da fuq)
And because they are SO quiet, they have to whip their tail against the ground whenever they enter a room.
:)
I like to imagine this reader as taller than Howdy, Barnaby, and Poppy! I'd say they're around 9 to 10 or so feet! That's quite tall!
Welcome Home headcanons!
The reader is not quite like the others! Unbelievably tall, beautiful horns, and even a long tail! What an interesting neighbor to have!
Wally Darling
"Hello there neigh...bor... You're-... wow-..."
Poor little fella! He might as well break his back to look up at you if he had any bones! Your size compared to him was a bit humorous, he could just barely reach your knees! You thought he was quite adorable, especially with how puzzled he was by your form.
"You're very... tall..."
You don't really talk and he assumed that was because you were mute, so he'd do a lot of the talking for you! Between the both of you, Wally would usually be the more chatty one seeing as you were more of the quiet type.
"Come on, neighbor... There's some lovely apples over at Howdy's store... Would you like to join me?"
Barnaby Beagle
"Well- hello... there-!"
Your first appearance was... startling, to say the least. The guy would be in for quite a shock! Seeing as he's used to being one of the more taller puppets around the neighborhood. Admittedly, he'd be a little intimidated at first, especially since you're so quiet! It's a little hard to get you laughing at his jokes but when he does, he just feels so proud of himself!
"What's the matter, neighbor? Cat got your tail?"
He'd definitely be very chatty with you, he'd even practice a few jokes of his in front of you. Barnaby slowly warms up to you with time and even seeks comfort in you! You're quite the listener, after all!
"And you know what I said? "I hardly know her!" Haha!"
Eddie Dear
"Jumpin' Critters!"
It was definitely a shock for him when he first saw you, he hadn't even noticed you until he bumped right into you! Your appearance was definitely unique and he's never seen anything quite like it! Eddie would be very curious about your tail, he'd think it looks quite lovely!
"How's the, uh, weather up there, neighbor?”
He’d definitely struggle to make small talk with you, but Eddie would very quickly get over it when he realizes you’re not the chatty type! He’d ask all kinds of questions, even if you’d only nod or shake your head. Eddie would just love to get to know you more better!
“Wanna come deliver letters with me? It’ll help ya settle in!”
Frank Frankly
“Oh, my… goodness…”
They’d definitely feel intimidated at first, but they’d try their best now to show it. Frank would be most fascinated by your horns, they’d want to hold them and they especially like talking to you! They love how they could ramble and rant on and on and you’d listen to their every word!
“And so Julie runs up to me and dumps all these leaves all over me! It took me ages to get it all off!”
You and Frank would become quite close and they’d often go to you when they want to talk or ramble or even just make simple and even meaningless little conversations. They find comfort in your presence and are see you as a safe space, mostly because you’re quiet and only ever make a noise to alert people of your presence!
“Would you maybe want to learn about… Butterflies? They’re my favorite.”
Julie Joyful
“Oh, neighbor, you’re sooo taaaaall!!”
Julie would be absolutely wonderstruck by you. She’d get a little too excited and try climbing you since you remind her of a tree, but she’ll fail either because you place her back down or she slides her way to the floor. She’d think you’re quite spooky… But in a good way!
“I have these pretty little gold things! They’d look amazing on you!”
She would just love to decorate your horns with all kinds of fancy jewelry, only if you’d let her of course! She’d pair those with some nice earrings too if she can get her hands on some! The two of you would usually bond by playing some of her games (you would always win hide and seek!) or you’d pass the time listening to her go on and on while you play around with her hair!
“Let’s play I spy! Wait- no… I have a better game! It’s Let-Julie-Climb-Neighbor-Again!”
Howdy Pillar
“Welcome! There… Neigh… bor…”
Oh Howdy is in for quite the shock! He’s so used to being one of the most tallest neighbors in the neighborhood that it was a surprise to see someone taller than him! Not to mention, someone with such a unique appearance to them!
“GaH! Neighbor! You gave me a heart attack!”
When you’d whip your tail onto the floor, Howdy would always let out a little scream. He’s one of the neighbors who dislike the tail whipping, he could just never see it coming! He won’t lie though, he’d admit that he would find your horns quite lovely looking… He’d compare them to his antennas!
“Hope nothing’s bugging you today, neighbor!”
Sally Starlet
“Wooow! You look… so… so… amazing!”
Sally would be absolutely captivated by you. She would love nothing more than to get to know her otherworldly neighbor! Every time she hears your tail whipping, she’d get so excited and go over to you right away! Sally is just so curious about you!
“Where did you come from?!”
She wouldn’t hesitate to ask you all kinds of questions! Even if you wouldn’t really respond directly, she doesn’t mind! Sally loves your company and would often invite you to watch her rehearsals, she would even ask you to join her sometimes as a silent actor!
“Frrrom the beginning!”
Poppy Partridge
“My… Look at you…”
Poppy wouldn’t know what to think! Such a unique individual you are, she’d think. Poppy loves having you around and she really likes baking with you too! This time, you find comfort in her presence. She’s just so motherly and caring! You can’t help but feel so safe around her!
“Are you alright, dear…?”
Out of anyone, you would be most comfortable being more chatty around her! She listens to your thoughts and even laughs at your jokes, Poppy absolutely adores your voice and loves listening to you speak! She feels quite honored that you talk more when with her!
“My, what a day you had!”
29 notes · View notes
judas-redeemed · 7 months
Text
yes yes characters doomed by the narrative always slap BUT what about characters saved by the narrative? characters who have already given up hope and don't know they have a happy ending? characters who believe they are a lost cause, characters who feel irredeemable, characters who think there's nothing left for them, but the narrative does provide a way out? what about the characters who don't expect anything good, who don't even remember how to wish for it anymore, who get the things they need anyway? what about the characters who actively run from being saved getting saved in a way they can't stop or control. what about being saved by the narrative!!!
22K notes · View notes
wizard0rbs · 3 months
Text
when the academic article is so good it has you giggling and kicking your feet
8K notes · View notes
thebibliosphere · 1 year
Text
Floating face down in a blank word document file, while not physically possible, is nevertheless a tangible authorial state.
52K notes · View notes
lale-txt · 5 months
Text
writing reader inserts is so funny because it's like. yeah you would NOT say that but now you do and you're gonna enjoy it. it's inevitably pouring a part of you into this fic. it's describing your dissociative daydreams in overly detail to everyone searching specifically for food to feed their dissociative daydreams. it's coming up with a hundred different scenarios on how to get railed by your favorite 2D man and yeah his dick is always big and he wants you so badly. it's playing barbie with Y/N who is like an universal OC at this point. it's going on silly little adventures in my mind and taking you all with me. reader inserts i love you so much.
6K notes · View notes
mrghostrat · 3 months
Text
Tumblr media
Aziraphale paused when his eyes fell on the drink in his hand. He stared at it. The golden blond wine refracted through the glass and cast a halo of yellow light over his table setting. He frowned. “I’m sorry,” he sputtered at Crowley. “Did you just—” [ MON HORRIBLE CHÉRI ]
i may be stuck in housemove limbo but i will drag myself out of the grave for these cartoomens requests
3K notes · View notes
tarabyte3 · 2 months
Text
Hey fanfiction writers: If no one's ever told you this before, it's not just fanfiction.
It's something you spent hours, days, maybe even months on, pouring your heart out onto a page because you were so full of passion and thoughts about a story or characters, you felt like you were going to explode if you didn't get it out. Maybe you lost sleep because your mind was racing with ideas or you forgot to eat or drink water because you were so focused. Maybe your back aches from being hunched over for so long, unmoving. Maybe you even felt like you were going a little feral because you were so excited about what you were creating, or were frustrated when you got stuck. Either way, you put your heart, mind, soul, and body into making something.
It's okay to want people to read it, and it's okay if you're disappointed that they don't or it doesn't get as much of a reaction as you were hoping for. Humans are social creatures. Sure, we write for ourselves, but we also share because the joy of doing so is just as powerful as the joy of the process. Of having created something.
We all experience that joy and that disappointment, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
So it's okay. It's not just fanfiction.
3K notes · View notes
liefst · 2 years
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Who will come into my kitchen and be hungry for me? A quote from Little Weirds by Jenny Slate engraved in a wooden spoon, 2022. (ig @jannekemakes)
46K notes · View notes
misc-obeyme · 5 months
Text
MC: Hey, Barbatos. Can you stop time?
Barbatos: Why do you ask?
MC: I’m exhausted and I really need to take a nap for a few hours, but I have too much going on.
Barbatos: I fear it would be quite irresponsible of me to stop the flow of time so that you may nap, MC.
MC: What if you took a nap with me?
Barbatos: I am not Belphegor. I’m afraid that tactic will not work on me.
MC: *sighing in disappointment* Okay. I'll ask Solomon. He might know a spell or something. And he'll definitely agree to nap with me.
Barbatos: …
Moments later, Barbatos found himself in his bed with MC cuddled up against him, snoozing peacefully. He mentally scolded himself for giving in so easily while his arms and tail tightened around MC protectively.
Tumblr media
masterlist | Thank you for reading!
2K notes · View notes
fleursdesmorts · 1 year
Text
every year people get angry when ao3 requests donations but honestly in a world where almost all spaces online are slowly being eaten by corporations which censor the content on those sites, having a fan-run fan-sponsored place where people can create gay art without fear is great
4K notes · View notes
vigilskeep · 7 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
read my powerpoint boy
1K notes · View notes
controld3vil · 25 days
Text
atreides and bene gesserit
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
pairing(s): dune 2 cast x actor!reader (platonic), austin butler x actor!reader
synopsis: requested by this ask!
⤷ alt: as clueless as you were about your sister's role, it brought you much surprise and joy to see her on the same carpet as you.
notes: reader uses fem pronouns as she's playing a role as a bene gesserit. reader is also described as wearing a sleeveless jumpsuit. and i really enjoyed lea seydoux's performance and hope to see more of it !! this is also COMPLETELY separate from the first two posts ive made since the readers r playing different characters yeah?
Tumblr media
When Denise Villeneuve asked you about the role of Lady Margot Fenring, you were genuinely shocked about his decision. You appreciated his works but have never gotten close to any of his sets before. You have worked with directors who've admired Villeneuve for his imaginative mind. And now, you witnessed his creativity in person for the first time.
The role was small and not as significant as the other main leads. Regardless, your character was just as enigmatic and complex as any other in the Dune franchise. Even though your time was short, it was a fun experience to learn and observe from. You weren't able to meet the entire cast after production, but with the NYC premiere, you were able to link up again.
You heard your name being called out. "Hello! How are you?" The well-known comedian and presenter by the name of Amelia Dimonberg was now beside you. In her jet-black corset dress, her style is chic and elegant. She hands you a microphone with the film's title plastered on it. "You look beautiful!"
"Thank you!" you sweetly recuperate, diverting your shoulders to the sight, cutely. You give a little pose before complimenting her own outfit. "You as well!"
"Do you have a memorable day on set that sticks out to you?" Amelia questions, subtly leaning toward your direction. And now you noticed her detailed eye makeup which enhances her outfit altogether.
"Well- I've had, like, only a few days," You let out a quick sigh. Truly it was nothing to be embarrassed about but you could not help but feel shy about it.
"Mmhmm! So all of them?"
"Yeah, all of them!" With ease, your shyness turns into giddy laughter as all you remember from your times on set. Recalling those tiny moments brought a small smile to your face. "Every day counted for me and that was enough."
"Oh absolutely!" Amelia chides, nodding in agreement. She quickly then moves onto the next question, "How long do you think you could last in the actual desert?"
"Oo that's a tough question," Lifting your fingers to rest on your chin as you try to contemplate an answer. "Ideally no- I feel like I could never recover from the heat."
"Yes yes, the heat's very intense,"
"Yeah- no I don't think I'd ever leave my house for that-" You shake your head nonchalantly, acknowledging how most of your scenes already were indoors. You could imagine how you would do in the desert of Abu Dhabi. It makes you appreciate the cast and crew even more for their effort to make filming more comforting and tolerable.
"Where would be your dream location to hang out? I'm assuming your home then since you prefer to say inside?" The blonde interviewer quickly catches on, eyebrows raising intrigued by your response.
Instead, you hummed bashfully, "Actually I think an oasis would be nice." The camera catches onto Amelia's face, fully fixated on you. "Which fits perfectly if I were to live in the desert actually!"
"Mm yeah, smart choice!" She responds more cheerily. "You can maybe go for a swim, you know-"
"Right right," You give her an playful look, "And you don't have to go thirsty!"'
"Absolutely, the best of both worlds," Amelia chirps, doing the same expression. "So this film centers a lot around dreams. Do you have vivid dreams of yourself?"
"Yes! I've uh- I've had many dreams of myself. I mean, this one, for example-" You turn to the camera, waving with the most adorable smile on your face. "'I'm living my dream right now!"
"You're living your dream right now!"
Tumblr media
In another section of the premiere, you were walking down the carpet for press interviews and photography. The set where the premiere was taking place was gorgeously made in the shades of black and orange, the perfect theme of the film. The entire venue was outdoors, allowing you to feel the cold air and be more at ease in the crowded space. There were more paparazzi than you had expected, and you suddenly became aware that you were alone. Without any friend or acquaintance to accompany by, you searched aimlessly for a familiar face.
Then there was a holler. And then multiple more came after, it made you confused really. Your head swerves to the sound of the person you so try to look for and immediately you're struck in awe.
"Anya?!" In an instant, you're seen running towards your sister in the far back of the premiere wall. People were reluctantly used to fast-paced relocations around the carpet. Therefore most did not mind your hasty stumbles through the crowd. It was almost comical how apparent your demeanor changed when you heard her, in fact, videos and pictures caught all of it.
"Hi!" She beams in her white dress robe. Her makeup was glowing, making her skin seem angelic, and sheer without impurities. Her outfit covers her like a nun, covering her head and body in almost transparent cloth. Yet it flows around her so elegantly, almost like she was an angel from the stars. She squeezes your figure firmly, only after releasing to gush about your appearance.
You adored a beige sleeveless jumpsuit. The color is complimented with tiny designs of sparkle. Its seams captured your figure perfectly, as you also wore a gold chain and bulky rings. From the lighting, it looks as though your outfit is shining. And to be completely honest, you prefer comfort over the judging looks of fashion critics. Therefore you wanted to wear something that you could still move comfortably in. Thus you were able to run over to your sister with ease.
Through the other lens and camera, they could pick up some of her words after. "You look so gorgeous! How are you here?!" Anya's expression changes into a perplexed one as she gets a hold of your shoulders, shaking them back and forth.
"I was invited obviously, "You said, mimicking her voice while holding onto her arms on yours. "You didn't tell me you were a part of Dune!" Viewers from afar could tell you were pushing an act, reacting as though you were petrified about how Anya managed to be here in the first place.
"I didn't know you were either!" She giggled, closing in on your right ear. Your sister whispers to you slowly, trying to withdraw from the camera and recordings. "Villeneuve had mentioned something but honestly I just thought it was a joke."
It was your turn to guff. Your mouth opens wide flabbergasted, looking sarcastically offended. "Why would you think he's joking?!"
Anya scoffs lightly, wanting to go further with the joke. "I don't know- I just didn't take his word seriously,"
"Why? Because you didn't think I'd make it into the film?" You accused, eyes widening with a hand over your heart. "You're so cruel."
"So cruel," She smirks up at you, then moves back to be by your side. You see her face forward the flashing cameras, as you do the same. "Come! Let's take some pictures!"
Tumblr media
"Your outfit looks beautiful by the way!" Anya Taylor muses, eyeing down at the fine details on your jumpsuit. "It's very... you!"
You give her a nod, before flattening some of the creases, "I thought this color was so exquisite, so I thought it would be perfect for the premiere." You lift your head to look at your sister, before realizing behind her, the upcoming stars of the film were getting ready to take cast photos. "Oh Anya- I think you should go!"
Your sister turns and then gazes back at you with a soft smile. "You should come with me!"
The thunder of cameramen and journalist blurred your focus for a moment. "Are you sure-"
Again the sound of your name is hurdled but this time from someone you haven't seen in a long time. Jessica Ferguson, who too wears a black body suit with veils and bold makeup. She waves her hand almost too eagerly to have you come closer alongside your sister. "Come, join us!"
Videos were filmed of the people gesturing to the cast of Dune in a line. Little by little, the row of people is filled and organized to be in the center of the camera's focus. Some actors had to move spots, due to lack of space or better color semblance on the other side of the row. You stood next to Jessica and Florence Pugh was beside your right, as you tried to stand closer for the picture.
Anya Taylor was on the opposite side, with Austin Butler and beside him, Timothee Chalamet. A noticeable clip taken all over was when the French actor went to greet the English actress, warmly, clasping her hand with both hands as a proper salute as on-screen siblings.
You did not mind the lack of attention. You were happy for Anya for achieving a great role. One with a welcoming cast and crew. It was then your eyes scanned down the row, from Zendaya to Stellan Skarsgard. Then to Austin, whom you've been familiar with since day one. Only him to find your gaze seconds later. You give a little nod and smile before averting your direction to Anya who is already staring at you with gleaming eyes.
Tumblr media
You were going back and forth with Jessica and Florence on your travels for a while. From plans reception to favorite desserts, all you three wanted to talk about was food. Paparazzi caught onto your banter quickly and snapped a few photos. You even went out of your way to do silly poses. Followed by Jessica and Florence, then did the same, sticking their tongues out in a rock star kind of fashion. You throw out piece signs, giving a dramatic frown as another flash happens.
Catch-ups were definitely refreshing and fun. Thus why you nearly jump when Austin appeared behind you.
"Oh my gosh, hey!" You stuttered, giving him a quick hug to calm your nerves. "You scared me!"
"Sorry sorry! I just wanted to surprise you!" He leans his head slightly, allowing better eye contact. You felt a few taps on your shoulder and noticed Jessica and Florence scurrying away, with their thumbs up, all goofy and excited.
Your eyes make it back to his. "I would've said hi back at the cast photo, but you were so far away," Shrugging you dismiss your failure as a mild missed opportunity.
But Austin shakes his head in an averted manner. "No- Don't worry about it." You could already sense interviewers and others with microphones closing on you two. You were out in the open, and it's bound to happen. "I wanted to- you know, say hi to you in a less chaotic place."
"I tried looking for you but there's just so many people," You give your costar an exhausted look. It was then a keen young man approached the pair of you. It was the People magazine, as you became aware of the logo alongside their camera and microphone.
"Hey, would you two mind a short interview for People's magazine?"
Truly, this was what premieres were about. The cast and crew meet with fans to show what they have worked so hard for. You brought you no better satisfaction than to praise everyone's efforts. The interviewer then proceeded to have a quick introduction of you and Austin beside you. You both had separate microphones in each hand. Once the video started rolling, you peered at the camera and gave the audience a grin.
"So how are you guys doing? Met all of your lovely cast members yet?"
"Oh absolutely," You emphasized every syllable, nodding. Austin only glances at you in amusement. "It's crazy how many people are here I was so overwhelmed!"
"Yeah, it was pretty crowded," The male actor adds, lowering his microphone slightly.
"Hopefully it will die down!" The interviewer beams. "So what was it like getting to know each other in this film? How was the first day on set like?"
"Oh, well it went very smoothly," You start, staring up at Austin in approval. "Even though my time was short on set, I feel like we had a pretty good rhythm starting out."
"I was about to say! The scenes with Feyd and Lady Margot were really something!"
"Why thank you, we appreciate it," Austin nervously laughs, scratching his ear.
The interviewer takes the lead to discuss your preparation for the role and how it was working with Villeneuve. As new characters, you and Austin both talked about your views on both of your characters. Both are very different yet mysterious to the viewers. Additionally, you two were introduced in a similar scene of the pit fight. The People's Magazine interviewer was compelled to compliment Austin on his opening scene. You knew he had practiced the choreographed fights vigorously. And of which you were lucky to witness on the days that you were present.
"It was completely freeing and different than what I was used to doing," Austin probes, leaning toward your direction. "Were you there for the pit fight?"
"I think I was," You turn, similarly. "I remember watching from afar and thinking wow." Immediately you could sense him eagerly looking down at you with a sly smile. "He was- Austin did amazing with the fight choreography, I was impressed!"
"Was this the first time seeing him in full costume too?"
"Oh yes!" You bonked your hand on your forehead, "He was and I just- couldn't believe it was him!"
Suddenly Austin jumps in, "She was startled when I first came up to her in full costume."
"You came out of nowhere, by the way!" You rebutted, giving him a side glance.
"I didn't mean to," As he tries to reassure his actions, "I wanted to give a good first impression!" It was humorous how playful you two were together despite having dissimilar filming schedules. Though most of your scenes involved Butler, your friendship only became more apparent weeks after working together. It was off and on for months at a time due to being busy in other countries simultaneously.
Eventually, you were able to link up again weeks before the premiere. After waiting a long time to meet up, you almost felt relieved that you hadn't seen your costar in a while.
"And Austin, how was filming with her?! From a character's standpoint, what kind of dynamic do you see playing out?" The People's Magazine interviewer perks up, having the camera transition from his face to Austin's.
"Well I'd say, she's great. You know I've got to meet a lot of amazing people in this film. And," He says your name sincerely, "She's- she's one of those people. I can't say much for Lady Margot and Feyd's relationship- you know there's a lot of that's still not uncovered. We don't really know what's happening but kind of have an idea of something. And to have such a great actress like her, it makes everything feel authentic and- feel the tension." It felt as if you were in a daze, eyes completely focused on his words with such admiration and grace. Before you knew it, you were smiling as if you had won the best possible prize in the world. His compliments to you meant more than you had anticipated really.
Unbeknownst to you, the cameraman had caught your lovestruck expression before directing attention back to the interviewer. "And how about you, Miss Margot?"
"I'd say it's the same," Now looking at the interviewer, only momentarily back at your costar. "Austin's- he's great at all the stunts and acting like a scary dude. Every scene with him was fun to do. Like he's all serious in character but once they yell cut! he's so nice and funny!" Your bubbly laugh breaks as you can feel your face growing hot.
"Well I appreciate you liking my humor," Austin pokes fun at you, fanning a little air towards you.
You mutter a soft thank you! before continuing, "And he's dedicated you know? I remember one scene, a little spoiler, where Feyd is about to be tested by Lady Margot, and I just couldn't do it! I couldn't keep a straight face!"
"Really?!"
"She just kept breaking, I don't know why," The actor shrugs, his attention closely drawn to you. "We had a few takes on a few days."
"We did! We did!" You gave a big frown, "You just have a really distracting face."
"Do I?" Austin asks, between the lines of teasing and coolly.
Tumblr media
By the time, other premieres had occurred, people were still focused on your interactions with Austin Butler. Your chemistry on and off screen on the carpet was hilarious. And with how polarizing your characters were, it made many clips of your shared encounters gain attention.
A few short videos were recorded after the People Magazine interview of you and Austin, bashfully talking behind the stage. The two of you went back and forth whispering in each other's ears about what was unknown to the viewer. Through a bird's eye view, the video also catches you hugging your arms before zooming in on Austin's placing an arm around your figure.
Another clip that had been reposted many times was when you both took duo pictures together. As you comfortably shift your weight on one leg, as you turn to have your side face the flashing paparazzi. Whilst the Elvis actor stands beside you at a pleasant distance, doing the same pose to the other side. There was one instance where you lifted your head to make eye contact with your eyes instantly brightening. As Austin's smile widened, only to blow air in your face.
603 notes · View notes
transmonstera · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media
BLESSING - transmonstera
[IMAGE ID: "to be loved by a trans person is a blessing" in white bold text. the text is surrounded by small white hearts and there are three cupids (cherubs) with bows around the text. the background is the painting the roses of heliogabalus. the image is overlayed with pink. END]
4K notes · View notes
miradragoncat · 3 months
Text
Notes
okay so I've seen this work a lot and I want to know how well it will go for me.
If this gets to 1,000 notes I will finish writing the second book in the series I'm working on.
If this gets to 5,000 notes I will ask my parents for a chest binder.
Before March. Let's see how this goes, and thank you even before this gets any notes
Note: it was getting too close to march, and we weren't very close. So I lowered it.
923 notes · View notes
thebibliosphere · 8 months
Text
Hm. I'm rereading something I wrote, and I can't decide if it's going to be infuriating for some readers, or if there will be more going "OH, same!"
Given that my readership is largely in the Autistic 🤝ADHD vampire fan club (Vlad), I'm hoping it'll be the latter, but it's still making me hesitate because it's not how people expect sex scenes to read.
Everything's usually boiled down to a laser-focused precision of sensations and evocative, heated language -- and that does eventually happen with this. You just have to get past Vlad's brain wandering around for a bit because while Nathan's doing a good job of getting his attention in the moment, he's not being consistent, and it's giving Vlad's brain time to wander. Like noticing that Nathan squints a bit when he reads. ("(Hyperopia, Vlad’s brain supplied helpfully before he could smother it.)") Or just generally having full-on conversations in his head in the downtimes between stimulation -- and by downtime, I mean the split second it takes for Nathan to grab something from the nightstand.
Another part of me worries people will think I'm playing to stereotypes or I'm hamming it up to be "quirky," but given my brain is the epitome of the "hyper 8-year-old boy who can't sit still shiny disorder" despite being a 36yo cis woman, I've pretty much resigned myself to some people calling Vlad a stereotype anyway.
A larger part of me just... kind of really wants to see this kind of thing in a sex scene. I want to see my own thought patterns and acknowledge that even when you're getting hot and heavy with someone -- arguably an act that should consume all of your attention -- you'll still find your mind wandering. You'll notice something out the corner of your eye and go, "fucking shit, laundry, do not forget, do not forget" (and then you'll forget), or you'll be about to go down on someone, and the dick joke your friend told you three months ago will pop into your head and suddenly you're snickering with no tactful way to explain it.
(This is another thing that I always think is sorely lacking in sex scenes. No one's messy. No one's laughing like an idiot because they just thumped their head into the headboard, or a joke just popped into their head. Or someone's body made a fart sound because there's lube in places and things are thrusting. Like, maybe it's me, maybe I'm weird, but I think those are the moments you can build real romance out of. Not necessarily erotica, because those things (supposedly) aren't sexy, but there's so much emotion you can show with partners who are able to laugh with each other in those moments. You can show so much love and reverence through the mundane it hurts.)
It'd just be nice, for once, to have the character be absolved of the guilt that often happens in those moments because you're supposed to be focusing on what is happening, and your idiot brain just won't shut up.
Ultimately, it doesn't matter too much. It's a short story I'm hoping to fling out at some point (as soon as my idiot brain shuts up and lets me finish it). But it feels more important than it actually is because it feels like I'm exposing a major part of my psyche. Like pinning down all the ugly parts of my brain that can't ever actually be pinned down, no matter how much I try.
idk. Words. Things. Stuff. I'm going to try and finish this and then see what I want to do with it.
2K notes · View notes