#their mozzarella sticks are AWFUL which... HOW do you fuck that up

[ashintheairlikesnow]

Habromania - delusions of happiness

For Jameson and Taron?

(@for-the-love-of-angst and I have a little AU where Jameson shows up at Vee's OC Taron's restaurant and becomes a regular visitor. Skittish and irritable, Jameson has a way of vanishing whenever he might have to admit he needs help. Eventually, his visits become more regular)

-

Laughter rings out warm between them, as the stray drops pepperoni over grated mozzarella, tomato sauce, and the flattened dough. "Bullshit," Jameson says cheerfully, in his permanently raspy voice. "That didn't happen."

"It did!" Taron, who had done the actual making of the pizza dough, stood back, with his back against a metal countertop, watching Jameson work. The stray had arrived the night before, the way he sometimes did, asking to sleep on the floor in the restaurant's back room. Taron was finding it harder and harder to say no, knowing that he only asked when he had someone to hide from that night.

So, he said yes.

And now they're making pizza after the restaurant closed for the night, and the kid seems easy and relaxed in a way he never is.

"Huh." Jameson lays the last pepperoni and turns with a flourish. "Et voíla!" He says, not even remotely attempting a French accent. "Is that good enough?"

"Yeah, sure. Just let me get it cooking. I'll head out after we eat."

"Okay." Jameson watches him take the pan and slide it into the huge industrial oven, washing his hands. Taron is aware of how Jameson watches his arms, the way the muscles move beneath. He tells himself he doesn't notice it at all.

Taron swallows, and decides maybe now is the time to broach the subject again. Maybe this time it'll stick. He closes the oven, takes a breath, and says, "You know, we've talked about you going somewhere-"

"Don't," The stray says, quickly. He can barely force his ruined voice loud enough to interrupt. "I don't want to talk about it tonight."

"You don't want to talk about it any night," Taron points out, and watches the stray's face shift into an immediate scowl. "You'd be safer with my friend Nat, much safer-"

"Yeah, til they kick me out for trying to fuck someone." Jameson spits the words. "Or for not trying to fuck someone, depending on which flavor of shitty the shelter is. Either too slutty or not enough, for them."

He always does this. Shifts into anger, into bringing up what he was made to do like a shield or a weapon. It reminds Taron too much of Lee.

"Nat isn't like that," He starts, keeping his voice gentle. But Jameson isn't having it, and he gives up with a sigh. "I know you don't believe me, but she's safe-"

"Every one of those bullshit shelters is safe if they like you," Jameson says, and there's a sudden heaviness to his voice. A weight that makes Taron take a closer look and see the awful sadness beneath his anger. "And they never like me for long."

"I don't think-"

"Don't. I'm not going to any of them, not again." Jameson swallows, shoulders hunched. Like a dog scared he's about to be chased away. "Please, just... Can we just eat the pizza and watch a movie like we talked about?"

Taron hesitates too long before he answers. He knows he does. Jameson looks smaller with every passing second. "Sure. We can, yeah."

"Okay, good. Thanks. I just... Just... Let me keep pretending for a while, okay?"

Taron just nods, and goes to set up his laptop for the movie. He doesn't ask exactly what it is Jameson wants to pretend.

#jameson au #i love taron #for the love of angst #runaway whumpee #bbu #box boy #box boy universe

[maggotzombie]

LIEBE LIESE: ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀ ᴠɪɪ - ℬ𝒶𝒹𝒹𝑒𝓈𝓉 ℬ𝒾𝓉𝒸𝒽

→ CHAPTERS LIST — CHAPTER VI: UNDER PRESSURE WORDS: 6,3k TW: Lots of alcohol, swearing, some fluff, family drama! A/N: Here we are! Thank you so much who stuck with me. I don’t really know why this took such a long time, but I want to gives special thank my in-house German queen, @hinagiku0 (you’re the best, I love you for still talk to me everyday), and the best beta out there, @itmejado (really, I can’t thank you enough for making my stories even better!). So here it is a very long chapter to compensate lol HEADS UP: German dialogue is marked with “[  ]”.

‘I WONDER what Henry’s up to’, the woman thinks.

She frowns. Having just come home from work, Liese is exhausted. But she doesn't feel like being alone tonight. 

The first person she thinks of is him and she’s even more surprised by the fact that she misses him!

‘So much for getting my hopes up, huh?’, she scoffs, searching for her phone.

She smiles and lets him know that she’s going to get ready.

After a quick shower, she puts on warm clothes and makeup. The simple pin-up look goes well with the color of her hair and Liese realizes it’s been a long time since last she wore red lipstick.

To get there faster, Liese calls an Uber and, oh how she regrets it. It’s chillier than usual tonight and sitting in the cold Tube is nightmare-inducing. However, having the Uber driver hitting on her all the way is also not the best...

Liese clearly isn’t keen on a conversation but he insists on it. To make things even worse, it’s Friday night and there’s traffic. So the doctor practically leaps from the car when the man parks in front of the pub.

The Builders Arms is a big pub but it’s packed. Well, again, it’s a Friday night, and it looks like there’s a match of some sort going on.

Running her eyes through the crowd, Liese quickly spots Henry’s broad shoulders and begins making her way towards him. His back is turned away from the entrance so he doesn’t see her but his friends sure do.

The three men staring at her don’t tear their eyes away as she approaches the small group. However, they seem disappointed, but not surprised, when the doctor goes straight towards Henry, resting a hand on the actor’s shoulder to get his attention.

“Hey,” She greets, a warm smile spreading across her lips.

He turns around to look at her. “Hey you,” Henry wraps an arm around her waist as she gives a friendly kiss on his cheek, leaving a faint mark of lipstick on it.

“Sorry, it took me so long to get here,” The woman starts, backing up to look at his face. Then, she reaches out to rub off the red imprint of her lips from his skin. “The traffic was awful tonight.”

“It’s okay. You’re ravishing,” Henry says and she smiles but, before she could say anything, one of his friends clears their throat. “Oh, sorry, let me introduce you to my mates. This is Mark, Juan, Roger, James, and my brother, Simon,” She shakes hands with each man he introduces, smiling. “This is Liese.”

“Nice to meet you guys,” Liese says.

“You, too,” Roger says. “You’re really pretty,” He adds and he would give Henry a pat in the back if he wasn’t across from him at the table.

It doesn’t stop the man from shooting him a glare. “Thanks,” She chuckles.

“Please, have a seat,” Simon says from beside his brother and Henry pulls the chair for her. “Heard a great deal about you lately,” He then says and Liese smiles at him.

“All lies,” She says, making them chuckle. “I’m as bad as they come.”

Although she feigned normalcy when greeting him, it didn’t go unnoticed that Henry just introduced her to his brother, a part of his family – and, of course, a bunch of friends. They’d known each other for less than a month; it was a huge deal.

The woman makes a mental note to kill Henry later.

“What will the lady have?” Mark asks and they look at him. “Wine?” He suggests.

She almost snorts for two reasons: his suggestion and what he called her. But, hey, she must be nice.

“Wine is for priests, love,” Liese jokes with a smirk. “I’ll have a pint, thank you very much – Oh, and the menu, please. I’m starving.”

Henry chuckles at his friends’ reaction and signals to the bartender. “Alright,” Mark nods. “I like you already,” He decides and she winks at him playfully.

“It’s the match over already?” The woman asks, trying to make conversation.

“No,” Juan replies. “Halftime,” He explains.

“Oh,” She says.

Her pint is placed in front of her alongside the menu. She orders a burger with French fries and mozzarella sticks. When the waiter leaves, she can finally take a drink.

“Hm, rugby. Of course,” Liese says to herself as she looks up at the flat screen everybody has their eyes locked on.

“Not a fan?” Simon asks, leaning on his elbows to look at her.

“I don’t know much about it, to be honest,” She replies, mirroring his position.

All the eyes snap in her direction. “Are you serious?” Henry asks in disbelief.

“No. I’m a football kinda woman, you know that,” The woman shrugs and he chuckles.

“That’s true,” He nods.

“Where are you from, Liese?” James asks and she looks at him before glancing back at Henry.

“I really don’t look British, do I?” She narrows her eyes.

The man laughs. “No, you don’t,” He shakes his head.

“Well,” Liese looks back at his friend. “I was born and raised in Hampstead but my family is from the Land of Poets and Thinkers…” She replies humorously.

Everybody chuckles, except Juan. “Which is?” He asks.

The woman looks at him in disbelief. “Deutschland!”

“Germany,” Some of the guys say at the same time as her.

“Oh,” He nods. “That doesn’t make sense,” Juan shakes his head.

“Cmon!” Liese throws her hands in the air in frustration. “I’ll give you some names: Nietzsche, Marx, Adorno, Horkheimer, Kant, Goethe, Beethoven, Bach, freaking Einstein, even the Grimm Brothers,” She ticks each name on her fingers.

They laugh and Henry rests his arm on the backrest of her seat. “Okay,” Juan nods, fairly convinced.

“I could go on,” The woman says. “And that’s just the ones on the top of my head.”

He shakes his head. “You’ve made your point.”

She nods, sipping on her drink and leaning back on her chair. Henry’s hand squeezes her shoulder fondly.

“Do you still live in Hampstead?” Simon asks.

“Nope. I’m on the other side of the river, at Brixton,” She replies and they start to boo her.

“Ah, you’re from the south,” James makes a disgusted face.

“Yeah, I know,” The woman shrugs off. “I did grow up on this side of the river, though!” She points out. “But the south it’s not that bad, guys,” Another round of boos. “Plus, it’s closer to work,” She adds.

“Now, don’t try to defend your side, South,” Mark mocks, taking a sip of his beer.

Liese chuckles. “Where do you work?” Roger asks and she looks at him.

“At St. Thomas’ Hospital,” She replies.

“Are you a doctor or a nurse?” James inquiries. “Or neither?”

“Doctor. A&E and pediatrician,” Liese explains.

“It means she’s smart,” Henry brags, sipping his beer and resting back on his chair.

“Yeah. I think we got it from the list of poets and thinkers,” Juan mocks.

She winks at him playfully. “You got it, baby,” Liese smiles.

“So, I got a question,” Mark starts and she nods for him to proceed. “Why the silver hair? I don’t see many doctors looking this cool.”

“I lost a bet to my younger brother,” The doctor replies. “A football bet,” She adds and they seem incredulous.

“Seriously?” James asks.

The woman shrugs. “Yeah. It’s just a thing we do.”

Their conversation dies when the second period of the match starts and the male attention drifts back to the TV. Although rugby is not Liese’s cup of tea, her eyes are fixed on the flat screen as well. She doesn’t know the rules and there’s a lot of tackling going on but she doesn’t mind. This is way better than being alone at home.

“Bärchen!” The shout from not so far is enough to make Liese sigh.

“I’m sorry,” She whispers to Henry, who’s heavily engrossed in the match.

“Huh?” He glances at her with a frown and she shakes her head slightly.

Roger grimaces at the shirtless man coming their way as Liese simply waits for her brother to get to her.

“Drunk guy alert,” He says and the woman rolls her eyes.

“[I knew it was you, Bärchen!]” Her brother says with a huge smile, standing beside the woman.

Her jaw almost drops to the floor when she looks up at him to find the man shirtless, displaying his tattoo collection on the rippled muscles for everyone to see.

“What the fuck?” She asks in disbelief. “[Why are you shirtless, asshole?]” Liese stands up.

He quickly wraps his arms around her and she groans without patience. She’s very aware of multiple sets of eyes staring at them but mostly the stench of alcohol coming from her brother.

“[Alright, let go of me],” She taps his back.

“[I’ve missed you],” He pulls away.

“[You literally dropped me off at work this morning],” She points out, spotting their friends over his shoulder at a table in the far back.

“Mate, you can’t stay here shirtless,” A worker says, looking at her brother.

“I’m taking care of it,” The woman reassures before turning to her table. “Excuse me, gentlemen,” She says before pushing her brother away.

“Who’s that?” James asks as they watch the woman escorting the shirtless tattooed man away.

“No idea,” Henry replies, trying not to feel as jealous as he already is.

His eyes linger on Liese from across the bar as she greets other men, scolding at a particular one and her brother, who’s pulling a shirt over his head.

The looks she received from men and even a few women on the way to the other table doesn’t go unnoticed. In fact, there are a few men still staring at the silver-haired woman and Henry suddenly feels the need to establish territory, which is incredibly stupid of him, but a basic instinct.

“[Weren’t you supposed to be babysitting tonight?]” She asks her brother, hands on her hips.

He shakes his head. “[Who are you here with?]” He asks, looking back at Henry’s table.

“[Do not deflect, Otto],” Liese says.

“[Is the guy you’re hooking up with?]” He continues and Henry glances back at them quickly.

“Otto…” She warns.

The man narrows his eyes. “[Hold on. Are you fucking Superman?]” He looks back at his sister with a smirk and she punches his chest, knocking the air out of his lungs. Their friends laugh. “Goddamn, woman,” Otto hisses, rubbing the spot.

Liese sighs, looking back at her table. “Come on,” She says, starting to move away. “Don’t embarrass me,” The woman adds quickly.

“When do I ever embarrass you?” He asks, following after her, his German accent very thick as if he was in Germany all his life.

The woman glares back at him. “How about a few minutes ago when you’re half-naked in front of everyone? Or just now, asking if I’m fucking Superman,” She asks ironically.

Otto nods. “Got it,” He says, and for the first time tonight, he takes a proper look at his sister. “You’re very pretty tonight.”

The compliment is delivered just as they stop at Henry’s table and all the attention is back on them.

“Thank you,” She replies before addressing the other men. “Gentlemen, this is my brother, Otto...” The woman starts. “Otto, this is Henry, his brother, Simon, and his mates, Juan, Mark, James, and Roger,” She introduces them.

“Nice to meet you,” Her brother says, shaking their hands as Liese sits back down, shooting an apologetic look to Henry.

Brad looks at Otto with a funny expression. “You have an accent,” He points out.

He snorts. “You too, mate.”

“No. I mean, your sister doesn’t have one,” Brad clarifies.

“That’s because you’ve never pissed her off,” Her brother chuckles and Liese simply takes a sip of her beer, refraining from commenting on it. “Hey, is it cool if my mates and I sit here with you guys?”

For some reason, everybody looks at Henry as if it’s his decision.

“Yeah. Sure, mate,” The actor nods.

“Sweet,” Otto turns around and his sister quickly looks up at him.

“Don’t –,” She’s cut off by his loud whistle, exactly what she was trying to stop. “[Dear Lord],” She murmurs, pinching the bridge of her nose.

Henry’s soothing touch is what eases out the stress a bit and she smiles at him.

Otto motions for his friends to come over and they quickly abandon their table. He takes a seat next to Liese and she shoots him a murderous look to which he simply grins. The blonde man introduces Nick, Josh, Pete, and John when they arrive.

Thanks to the still-ongoing rugby match, they simply sit and start to pay attention to it. Liese knows her brother is not interested at all in the match, just like her, but he pretends to watch it just so he can avoid her confronting him.

The woman’s stomach grumbles when a waitress brings her food and she sighs happily, picking up the heavy burger. She’s aware of Otto’s eyes at her food and she doesn’t even take the first bite before he asks for one.

“This looks good,” He points out, looking at it suggestively.

She glares at him but gives him the burger anyway. “Are you fucking kidding me?” Liese asks, looking at the size of his bite when he gives her the burger back. He shrugs off. “You’re unbelievable.”

She takes a bite and Otto takes the burger again, giving it back without another huge chunk missing. Liese literally has two bites of her burger before she gives up and lets her brother have it. Ignoring her craving for the oily meat, she tries to satisfy herself with the French fries and mozzarella sticks.

A hand reaches out for her fries and she slaps it away. “Don’t you dare,” The woman seethes.

Her brother chuckles. “Want another one?” Henry gently asks.

Her mood shifts like a bipolar person and Liese smile, looking up at him. “No, it’s fine.”

“You sure?” He raises an eyebrow and she nods.

“Thanks, though,” She says.

“[That’s disgusting],” Otto murmurs from her side, mouthful.

Liese rolls her eyes before looking back at him. “[Dude, if you don’t shut up, I’ll make sure you don’t have kids ever again],” She threatens.

Her brother chuckles. “[You’re so whipped],” He keeps teasing. “[But he looks whipped, too],” Otto adds.

“Shut up, Otto,” The woman groans, too tired to deal with his bullshit.

“I’m serious,” He insists.

Something happens at the rugby match because everybody cheers and Otto stops teasing his sister, trying to understand what happened. While they watch the game, the men at the table express several emotions with curse words in each sentence.

Liese finds it amusing because they were trying to be very polite and gentlemen with her earlier, avoiding any kind of dirty word or term to not offend her. Now, they’re simply being themselves, without caring about anything. Or they simply forgot about her.

Even Henry, who doesn’t cuss a lot outside the bedroom, has expressed quite a few unpleasant words towards the referee out of discontentment.

It’s completely alright, though. The woman is probably the same or even worse when it’s a football match. As of now, she sips her beer while watching them have some fun.

“FUCK YEAH!” Roger shouts after the referee ended the game, guaranteeing England’s win.

The whole bar cheers and the man looks back, finding Liese’s eyes on him, an amused smirk on her lips. She snuggled closer to Henry during the game and now she’s pressed to his side. Her right foot is propped on her chair and she’s resting a hand on the actor’s thigh, while he has his arm draped over the back of her chair.

Experience taught him to be discreet with relationships, but Liese isn’t giving a single fuck. They were in the Daily Mail last month.

The doctor raises an eyebrow at Roger’s sour expression. “What?” She asks.

“Sorry,” He says meekly.

“What for?” Liese frowns.

“I think I got carried away with the match and forgot about the lady at the table,” The man explains.

She chuckles while Otto and their friends laugh loudly. Roger seems very confused with the reaction to his apology and the other men stare at them with a mixture of curiosity and amusement.

“Who’s this lady and when is she coming back?” Otto howls.

“You guys don’t know Lis. This woman is crazy,” Nick says, shaking his head.

“I just met them, idiot!” Liese rolls her eyes.

“Are you trying to impress someone, Bärchen?” Josh asks with a grin.

“Nein,” The woman shakes her head slightly, drinking her beer. “But it looks like I’m about to,” She points out.

“Well, let me tell you a few things about the… lady,” Her brother’s best friend starts.

For the next few minutes, the guys rave on and on about the woman, somehow trying to point out how she’s not a lady.

Henry shifts on his seat. Jealousy is the feeling of the moment. He’s not very fond of four unknown men talking about the woman he’s with, saying things he doesn’t know about her. The simple fact that they know her for longer is unnerving.

“It’s not because she’s my sister, but Lis is like… The baddest bitch I know,” Otto says and I look at him with an amused expression on my face. “I’d take her to every college party I went to.”

“Weren’t you ashamed of bringing your big sister to a party?” Simon asks.

He shakes his head. “The opposite, actually. I wouldn’t beg her to come because she always said yes from the start, but Bärchen was, and still is, the first person I’d call,” Her brother explains.

“Hadn’t you graduated by the time he got into college?” Henry asks the woman.

“Ideally,” Liese nods. “But med school takes forever sometimes. I was starting residency when Otto got into college so, technically, I still was a student,” She says. “And I’d always say yes because med students are fucking boring and never have some fun.”

“Anyway. We’d party so much. Bärchen would drink the same amount of us if not more,” He continues. “In the next morning, she was the one taking care of five or six dudes, I included, in the ER. Hooking us to IV bags or pumping stomachs, as if she had a perfect night of sleep instead of partying with us,” Otto shakes his head, looking at his sister with admiration.

She chuckles. “Alright. You guys are being too nice,” She says. “What do you want?”

“Nothing,” John dismisses quickly.

Liese tilts her head and raises an eyebrow, staring at them. “Well, if you’d be so kind as to check out a few bikes for us…” Nick suggests nonchalantly.

Josh scolds him and Pete nudges his arm in a scolding manner as the woman laughs. “See? I knew it!” She grins. “I’ll take a look at my schedule and let you know.”

Her brother nods. “How many siblings do you have?” Roger asks.

“We’re five. Four men and her,” Otto replies.

“So you’re daddy’s little girl,” Juan says.

Some men cringe at that, Henry included, but some laugh, and Liese can’t help but chuckle along. “Please, don’t say that,” Simon says.

“Yes. Dad sometimes pampers me as the only daughter,” Liese replies. “But I know better than waiting for a special treatment being one out of five.”

“Pampers?” Otto asks with sarcasm. “You’re downright spoiled rotten by dad, Bärchen.”

“Am not,” She counters and her brother gives her a pointed look.

“The man nearly died when you moved out and, to refresh your memory, he’d call you multiple times a day or randomly show up at your apartment,” He says.

She tilts her head in thought and slowly nods. “Okay. I might be somewhat spoiled,” The woman agrees. “I’ve just realized he stopped showing up since I moved,” She points out.

“Maybe he doesn’t have a key,” Her brother suggests. “At least he won’t give him a heart attack,” He nods his head towards Henry.

“[Dad doesn’t know about him],” She says in German so only Otto could understand but Josh did too.

“Huh?” The actor asks with a frown.

Otto looks at him and smirks before taking a sip of his beer.

I chuckle before starting to answer. “Since I moved out of my parents, dad would randomly show up at my apartment. Usually in the mornings. He wanted to check if I was okay and would make me breakfast.”

“Spoiled,” Her brother says under his breath and rolls his eyes, earning a slap on his arm.

“He had a spare key, so he’d let himself in,” Liese paused. “He wasn’t happy when I started having guys over…” She trails off and a collective “ooh” feels the table. “Then I lectured him about privacy and boundaries.”

“Did that work?” Simon asks.

“No,” The guys laugh. “But he found out he enjoyed the element of surprise.”

“And being a total creep,” Her brother adds.

“Instead of waking me up, and my company, with a scare, he would sit in the corner of the room or at the end of the bed and watch us sleep,” The guys cringe. “I’ve got used to it pretty quickly but my dad is a big, burly, German guy so it was funny to watch grownup men nearly having a heart attack at the sight of him.”

“How many guys came back?” Brad asks.

“Three,” The woman replies.

“And you guys?” Roger asks Otto.

“Ah, now that’s fun,” He smirks, standing up. “I’m gonna take a piss,” He announces.

A few guys look at Liese. “It’s okay. I’m not offended by that. We’re already established that I’m not a lady. I grew up around men and I’m always around you bunch,” She clarifies.

Her brother says something in German that makes Liese’s jaw drop and Josh laugh loudly. Otto has a massive grin on his face and flinches away from the woman when she reaches out to grab him, nearly stumbling on his own feet. Then, she proceeds to profess multiple curse words at him.

Her angry gaze turns to the man still laughing at the table. “[What do you know about that?]” She asks him, not bothering to switch back to English.

“Bärchen…” Josh gives her a knowing look. “What do you think?”

“[Did that asshole tell you?]” Liese points at Otto, who’s watching from afar.

“No,” The man shakes his head, not giving too much so the others wouldn’t have a clue about what they’re talking about and it’s working.

It’s pissing Henry off.

“[If I ever hear you thinking about it, I’ll kill you],” She threatens.

“Hey. I didn’t bring it up!” Josh defends himself.

“What’s the matter, Bärchen?” Otto smirks from a safe distance.

“Fuck you,” The woman seethes at him.

Eyebrows shot up at her words. “Oh, he’s dead,” Nick shakes his head.

“You can speak German?” Roger asks Josh curiously, after watching the exchange before him and Liese.

“Nein,” The man replies humorously. “Their four-year-old niece speaks better than I do, but I can understand them.”

“Spit it out, Josh,” Liese demands after her brother disappears inside the bathroom.

He was in the middle of drinking from his beer. Instead of swallowing, he inhales and the shit is done. Josh chokes on the beer and spits it at the table, starting a coughing fit.

The woman grimaces. “Not literally, idiot,” She says, throwing a napkin at him. “What happened?” Her tone changes from angry to worried.

“What’s going on?” Henry asks, frowning.

“I don’t know,” Josh starts and coughs a few more times. “He said he couldn’t come tonight and he was all excited, saying he’d get Bobby…”

“Two hours later he showed up, smelling like a bottle of whiskey, and nearly punched me when I asked about Bobby,” John goes on.

Liese groans, covering her face with her hands. “Not this shit again,” She mumbles to herself. “Thank God I have white hair ‘cause this is draining my life force!”

“But he’s not drinking anymore,” Nick points out. “He’s been nursing this pint since he spotted you and that’s warm by now.”

Liese nods along, realizing it now. The pint is full.

“Who’s Bobby?” Henry asks and the woman looks over at him.

When she opens her mouth to explain, Otto appears in the corner of her eye. “I’ll explain it later,” She says. “Not a word about it,” She glares at the others.

“Hi! Can I have a towel?” Josh asks the waiter. “I made a mess, I’m so sorry,” He grimaces apologetically.

Her brother refuses to sit next to her again, knowing he’d suffer for his comment earlier. So he switches seats with Nick. The poor waitress manages to clean Josh’s mess and blushes profusely at his sexy smirk.

“Dude, don’t you have a movie or something coming out anytime soon?” John asks Henry, finally bringing the inevitable Hollywood topic to their conversation.

Henry thinks for a bit. “Yeah, yeah. Mission Impossible is coming out shortly,” He nods.

“Finally,” Simon adds.

The actor chuckles at the comment. “Yeah, finally,” He agrees.

“Oh, shit. I’ve seen the trailer for it! It looks so amazing, mate! When can we watch it?” Josh pipes in, excited.

“Thanks, mate. Uh, I know for sure that the world premiere is gonna be in Paris, 12th of July, to be exact,” He says.

‘That’s close’, Liese thinks to herself.

“But I’m pretty sure there’s a premiere here too, I just don’t know the date. The promotion for this film is gonna be massive,” Henry finishes.

“When are you leaving for it?” His brother inquires.

“Officially, in a couple of weeks,” He replies.

‘Wow’, the woman is impressed by the information she’s hearing for the first time in forever.

“But I have meetings with Dany and there’s a couple of events that I have to go before it, so I’m flying to America next week and just gonna go from there.”

Liese sees the glances she gets from her brother and Josh from the corner of her eye. She simply licks her lips and takes a sip of her pint, acting as if she always knew about everything Henry said.

She can’t help but feel like an idiot that has been strung along all this time. Sure, they’ve never put a label on their relationship but he obviously has been keeping that information for a long time and now the actor slapped an expiration date on whatever they have going on.

However, the woman doesn’t let this affect her night. Everybody drinks and talks with a chill atmosphere around them, but Liese can’t ignore the other pressing issue: Otto’s family drama. She wonders how much longer her brother is gonna play pretend.

So she asks it. “[Otto, for how long are you going to pretend everything is fine?]” The woman bluntly asks.

Even though he’s now sitting across from the table, everybody understands it’s a private conversation since they switch to German.

His whole demeanor changes. “[If we pretend there isn’t a problem, it’ll disappear, right?]” He says sarcastically.

“[Sure. You can also stare at the bottom of a whiskey bottle for the rest of your life but that’s alcoholism],” She replies in the same tone.

Otto sighs and brings his hands to his face, pressing on his closed eyelids. Josh tries not to pay attention to their conversation but he’s equally worried and also curious to know what’s going on.

“[Iris is acting up again, like the fucking maniac she is],” Her brother confesses.

“[Yeah, we already established that you have the worst taste for women],” Liese points out. “[What’s she bitching about now?]”

“[She doesn’t want to allow my daughter to spend time with her fucking father because I date ‘whores and I don’t want my child around this kind of people’,]” He makes air quotes.

Just talking about it angers Otto. His blood boils at the stupidity his former-hookup pulls to make his life a living hell.

He rolls his eyes and his nostrils flare. Suddenly, he feels too sober to deal with it without exploding, so he gulps at his pint, regretting it immediately as the beverage has warmed up to room temperature.

His sister, on the other hand, laughs. But it drips with sarcasm.

“[What a fucking hypocrite],” She shakes her head at it.

“[Tell me about it],” Otto murmurs, searching the waitress with his eyes. “Hey! Could you bring another one to me, please?” He asks in English. “And an Irish Car Bombs,” He orders.

Eyes turn to him at his specific request and Liese shakes her head slightly at Josh.

“Make it two Irish shots,” The woman pipes in and she notices Henry’s glance at her.

“One pint, two Irish Car Bombs,” She repeats to make sure.

“You got it, sweetheart,” Otto nods.

The waitress nods and quickly walks away, blushing. Josh elbows the German guy and gives him a dirty look, making Otto shrug off.

“[What are you going to do?]” Liese brings back the pressing issue.

“[I don’t fucking know!]” Her brother seems desperate. “[I can’t reason with that bitch because she’s beyond it but I want and need to see my daughter as I have the right to].”

“[You can serve her],” She suggests and Otto visibly stiffens at her words. “[Just like she served you for child support that you were already paying],” She points out.

“[Uh, I don’t know about that],” The man hesitates. “[This seems too much. I want to keep my relationship with Iris amicable].”

Liese stares at him like he’s demented. “[Amicable? What’s fucking amicable in that relationship, Otto? She’s literally forbidding you to see your own daughter!]”

“[Still won’t do it. That’s the deep end],” Her brother shakes his head.

Before the woman could say anything else, the waitress came back with their drinks. She quickly set the full glasses on the table before walking away with another blush, now caused by Josh’s wink.

“Stop that,” Liese says to him.

“What?” He asks.

“She’s working. She doesn’t need another man-whore making her night harder.”

“But I’m not doing anything,” Josh complains, smirking.

The woman gives him a dirty look, taking the shot glass. “Bet?” Otto suggests and her eyes turn to him.

“You sure?” A smile starts to creep on her face. “I’m shit at football bets but this,” She makes a face. “This is my shit. To this day, you’ve never managed to beat me,” She points out.

“Yet,” Her brother corrects her. “Tonight is gonna be different,” They clink their shots.

“I don’t know about that,” She tilts her head slightly, tapping the glass on the tabletop as Otto mimics her movements.

Quickly, money piles up in front of John. “Anyone want to bet on my mate Otto to boost up his confidence?” The man asks and Liese throws her head back in laughter.

“You all suck,” Otto scowls at their friends.

Nick explains what they’re betting on and most of Henry’s friends don't believe that the woman can chug down the drink faster than her brother, the actor included. In the end, they’ve gathered two-hundred pounds in total.

“I get a share of this, right?” Liese points to the cash.

“Of course,” Josh winks at her and raises his fist for her to bump.

“There’s no way you can beat him,” Simon interjects, shaking his head in disbelief. “He’s twice your size,” He points out as if it’s a valid point.

She chuckles. “Watch me,” The woman says, picking up her shot glass again. “There’s still time to give up,” She raises an eyebrow at her brother.

“Just do it,” Otto shakes his head.

“Alright. Don’t cheat, you little shit,” She says.

They clink their drinks and tap them on the table again, before eyeing John to do the countdown. After dropping the shot inside the Guinness pint, it’s game. Both of them rush to bring the glass to their lips and chug the drink down faster than the other as the people around cheer.

As announced, the woman beats her brother easily and she puts her glass down with a small smile, licking the foam from her red lips. Their friends celebrate along with James and Juan, who also betted on Liese, as the others look at her in shock.

“I want to marry you so badly right now,” Mark says to Liese.

She chuckles and Otto gives him a dirty look. “With the little faith that you put in me, I don’t think so.”

At the mention of a wedding, some of the guys realized they have wives at home and called it a night. Their table collectively decides to ask for the check to leave.

Josh suddenly disappears as they make their way to the door and Henry gets stopped to take photos with fans. While he does his thing, Liese waits for him, who stays behind with his brother, at the entrance of the bar.

The sound of her laugh makes the actor glance at her and there she is, with the most genuine smile on her face, looking at his friends while sandwiched between Nick and Pete. Her sparkling eyes look up at Nick as he says something and her form shakes with another laugh, her head resting back on Pete’s shoulder.

“Henry, can I take one, too? I’m a big fan!” The female voice makes him look back.

He smiles, momentarily ignoring the scene outside. “Sure.”

Then, he quickly excuses himself and joins the group with Simon. “Oh, no,” Liese says as Mark finishes his story.

“Yeah,” He nods, his lips in a thin line. “But everything is fine now,” He smiles again.

“Well, I’m so sorry about that,” She adds. “You can let me go now - thank you,” She says to Nick and Pete quickly and untangle themselves from her. “There’s a bunch of assholes still in practice. The good ones are rarely seeing patients. Usually, they start to teach. But, in the name of good professionals, I apologize,” The woman continues.

Mark chuckles. “Don’t sweat,” He shakes his head slightly.

“Well, I should go,” Brad starts.

The goodbyes start. Henry’s friend says Liese is great and she says the same to them. They also bid their goodbyes to the woman’s friends.

“There’s one of you missing,” Juan points out.

Pete looks around. “Where the fuck is Josh?”

Liese scoffs. “Where do you think? He’s either coming back with the waitress or her number,” She says after hugging Roger.

They chuckle but agree with her. “Lis, I can drop you off,” John offers as the designated driver for the night.

Her petty self nearly gets the best of her, but she thinks before replying: “It’s fine, John. Thank you, though.”

The man nods and then Liese starts to bid goodbye to them. When Otto opens his arms to hug his sister, she clutches a fistful of his hair. The man hisses in pain as she pulls his head down to her height but he chuckles when she whispers a threat in his ear. She hasn’t forgotten about what he said earlier before sitting across from her to not get punched.

Well, it doesn’t work.

Suddenly, Josh materializes himself as if he was with the group the whole time. Liese turns to him and scowls, in a big sister mode.

“What?” He asks.

“Do not fuck the girl,” She chides.

There it is: his lips pull in a huge grin. “I won’t,” He starts. “Not tonight, at least. But I got her number,” He confesses.

Liese rolls her eyes as the men roar in laughter at her right guess and swat his arm. Either way, she pulls him for goodbye and he plays a chaste kiss on her cheek. For Henry, his lips lingered way too long on his girl.

Everybody parts way and Liese is left alone with Henry and Simon. She hugs his brother and tells him how happy she is for meeting him. He reciprocates all the compliments, adding a few of his own, before getting into an Uber.

“Did you drive here?” The woman looks at him, after what seems like a long time.

“No, I walked,” He replies. “We could get an Uber too,” Henry suggests.

“I’d prefer to walk if you don’t mind,” She tilts her head slightly.

The man nods, motioning her to go ahead. “By all means,” He says and they walk side by side, however, without touching.

After a while, when they’re away from the crowded bar, she sighs with a content smile on her face. “Thank you for letting me come,” Liese says, honestly, looking at him. “I didn’t want to spend the night alone.”

“Of course,” He nods again. “You okay,” He adds as notices her petite form shivering slightly.

She shakes her head, dismissively. “Just a little cold,” The woman replies, looking straight ahead. She halts when Henry’s buff body blocks her way and looks up at him with a frown. “Wha-?”

Liese is cut off by the man pulling his beanie off and carefully puts it on her head. Her heart flutters and she smiles at his focused frown as he adjusts the hat.

“There you go,” Henry says with a nod.

She stands on her tiptoes and presses her lips against his before he could blink again. He becomes stiff from the sudden move but relaxes when she giggles.

“You’re something else,” She whispers against his lips.

Henry smiles and wraps his arm around her to keep her warm before they resume the walk.

* * *

— CHAPTER VIII (COMING SOON)

#henry cavill #henry cavill fanfiction #henry cavill fic #henry cavill fanfic #henry cavill imagine #henry cavill x ofc #liebe liese #the witcher #geralt of rivia #geralt #august walker #detective marshall #walter marshall #captain syverson #cpt syverson #syverson #clark kent #superman #napoleon solo

[heavenlymisa]

bounce-back to a throwback.

Erik “Killmonger” Stevens x Black!reader

warnings; The n-word, fluff, angst (only for a lil bit) 

summary; (this is a continuation of “his lil secret”) During Erik’s live-stream, you two decided on playing 21 questions, which turns into a time of remembrance. (this sounds like a hallmark movie-)

an; ya’ll done ate his lil secret UP- anyways, enjoy! <3 ALSO, a huuggee thank you to @ljstraightnochaser​ for giving me ideas! Couldn’t do this without you, boo!

“Bring lil’ mama back. Aht aht! Nobody calls her that except for me! Don’t play!”

“Babygir- Hold on now! Ya’ll niggas ain’t gonna sit there and call my baby babygirl like she’s yours.”

“Where did Y/N go? She’s downstairs eating her lil mozzarella sticks, still mad at me for not making them.”

“When your girl comes back, tell her to holla at a homebo- Nigga i’ll fuck you up- Matter of fact, BLOCKED. Stop fucking around with me, you ain’t my homeboy.”

You were sitting at the dining room table, eating the mozzarella sticks you made just a few minutes ago, while watching Erik on his Instagram live. Of course, he was just upstairs, but you decided to just let him take over his live for a little bit. 

After you left you and Erik’s bedroom, Your Instagram blew all the way up. Over the course of 9 minutes, your page went from 10k to Almost 100k. You didn’t really like the attention you got, but you weren't really phased about it either. 

“Is she still watching the live? I don’t know.” Erik said, still on live. 

You quickly commented on the live before the subject changed.

‘i’m still here :) what’s up?’

A couple of seconds passed before Erik saw the comment and smiled.

“Hey baaabbyyyeeee!” Erik yelled. You could hear him all the way upstairs..

‘you’re so loud i can hear you downstairs 🙄’

“Sorry, Mamas. You almost finished eating?”

‘yup! just gimme a sec to put my plate in the sink.’

“Aight. Make sure to come back upstairs!”

You hurried up and put your plate in the sink and dashed up the stairs, clutching your phone in your hand. As you walked up to the door, you turned off your phone and put it in your back pocket.

When you opened up the door to your shared bedroom, Erik looked up and dramatically gasped.

“Oh my god. A goddess walked into my room!” He set his phone on the nightstand and faced it towards where you were standing. He got up, rushed over to you, and threw his arms around your waist. You places your arms around his neck, while laughing as he spun you around softly.

“Babes, I missed you!” He kissed your forehead.

“Baby, it’s only been like twenty minutes, you’re fine!” You said while laughing.

He picked you up, which automatically made your legs wrap around his waist, while his arms stayed around your waist.

“Girl, you trip me out.” He said while laughing.

He sat down on the floor while you were still clinging onto him. You looked to the side and saw his phone propped on his lamp, still on live. You got off of his lap and crawled to his phone to read some of the comments while Erik dramatically fell unto the floor and started to whine.

‘she’s baacckkkk!’

‘ya’ll making me feel mad lonely :(’

‘Erik picked out a good one! 🤤’

‘mama got some sexc eyes thougghhh’

ew-

‘god clearly got favorites smh’

“Why did you leeavveee meeee!” Erik whined while squirming on the floor.

“Because I wanted to. Case closed.” You said while still looking at his phone.

“But I wanted you to stay, Babyyygirlll.”

“I was bored over there, but I’m entertained over here. So, I’m staying here, babe.”

‘PERIOD POOH-’

“Well okay.” Erik said while walking over to you and sitting on the floor beside you. “How can I make you not bored with me, ma?”

An idea popped into your head.

“Let’s play a game. Twenty-one questions.”

Erik grabbed his glasses, which were discarded on his dresser, and placed them on his face.

“Alright. Let’s play. I’ll go first.” He said while facing his whole body towards you.

“Question One, What’s one of my bad habits?”

��You leave the toilet seat up.”

“That isn’t a ba-”

“I fell into the toilet almost five times this week.” You said with a straight face.

Erik started to say something, but closed his mouth immediately when it opened.

“M’kay, my turn!” You said with a grin.

“Do you regret spilling that hot ass drink on me when we first met?”

“Hell no! I wouldn’t have met the love of my life if I didn’t.” Erik said while hugging your waist.

‘That’s how you guys met?!’

‘omg please tell us how you two met!’

You looked down at the man baby who was looking at the comments also while laying his head on your thigh. You stroked the side of Erik’s face and sighed.

“Alright, alright. I’ll tell you guys how us two met.”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

“Hello, may I get a Grande Caramel Macchiato?”

“Y/N, stop acting so formal with me, girl. I got you!” 

Currently, you were in Starbucks visiting your friend, Ebony, while she works. You usually don’t drink Starbucks, but it was cold outside and your body was begging for something hot. 

“Thanks girl.” You walked to a table, sat down, and pulled out your phone, patiently waiting for your drink.

After a minute, the bell for the door rang. Four guys walked into the Starbucks and sat down at the booth diagonal from your table. After a few seconds, one man stood up and went to the cash register to order.

“Girl, come get your drink. It’s on the counter!” Ebony said while going back into the kitchen.

You stood up, went to the counter, and grabbed your drink. The drink wasn’t as hot as you would imagine on the outside, but you knew the second that drink would hit your tongue, hell would be loose in your house.

As you went to turn back to go to your table, an elbow came in contact with your drink, making it splash all over your shirt and partially your face. 

“Oh shit!” The man in front of you exclaimed while running to get a paper towel from the bathroom.

You yelped and started to frantically fan yourself with your hand to at least try to cool yourself down. The man came back with some wet and dry paper towels and handed it over to you. You snatched it out of his hands and started to clean yourself off while the man was still watching you.

“What? You gonna wait for me to get another hot drink just so you can spill it on me?” You said, irritated.

“I’m sorry-”

“Sorry doesn’t fix all of this!” At this point, you were irritated and just wanted to go home.

The man sighed and shoved his hands into his hoodie pockets.

“At least let me make it up to you. I honestly didn’t mean for all of this to happen..” The man said, sheepishly.

You weighted your options for about one minute until you caved in.

“Alright....”

“Here.” The man took off his hoodie and gave it to you. “Go to the bathroom, take off your shirt and put that on.”

Without responding you went into the bathroom and changed. The second you put on the hoodie, you got hit with a beautiful scent. You breathed into the hoodie and smelled Vanilla and cologne. You immediately felt warmth from that hoodie and never wanted to take it off. You walked out of the bathroom to be met with the man holding a Grande Caramel Macchiato.

“Here. I promise I won’t spill it on you.”

You took the drink while he took your stained shirt.

“C’mon. Let’s go.”

“Go? Go where?”

He chuckled.

“It’s a surprise. Just come on.”

He started to walk while you stayed behind. He looked behind himself and saw that you didn’t move an inch and huffed.

“Girl, come on.” He said with a dramatic expression.

“We’re strangers. What makes you think that you’re gonna take me somewhere?”

He chuckled.

“My name’s Erik. What’s yours?”

“Y/N.”

“There, we’re not strangers. Now come on. I’m trying to make this up to you.”

You looked over to Ebony who was persuading you to go with his silently. You giggled softly and gave in.

“Fine... I’ll go..”

Erik excused himself from the three other guys and went to his car while you followed him. He unlocked his car while you stood there in awe. As he opened the passenger side of he car, he looked at you and chuckled.

“You like it?”

You walked up to the passenger side and sat down in the seat.

“Like it? It’s gorgeous.”

Erik winked at you and shut the door. He walked over to the other side, got in, and started the car. He grabbed two sunglasses, he put one pair on and handed the other pair to you. You carefully grabbed the sunglasses and put them on. Erik turned on the air and looked over to you.

“You know, i’m truly sorry about spilling that drink on you.”

You put the Starbucks drink in his cup-holder and looked over to him.

“It’s alright.” You said with a smile.

Erik smiled back and pulled out of the Starbucks parking lot.

-------

“Erik, I can’t accept this-”

“Yes you can-”

“Erik, no I can-”

“Just take it.”

“No, I’m not taking i-”

Erik shoved his credit card into her hand.

“Ma, just take the card. Go crazy, okay? Just make sure to buy me something.”

Currently, you two were inside the mall at the food court. Erik wanted you to buy some stuff with his credit card as a way to say “sorry”. Of course you believe that he was sorry, but giving a girl your credit card and just saying “go crazy with it” is another type of sorry. The best kind.

“Alright.” You said. You breathed in the scent of his hoodie before you two started to walk inside the mall.

“So... What do you work as?” 

“Hm? Oh, I’m a rapper.” Erik said bluntly.

“Like... A soundcloud rapper?” You absolutely hated soundcloud rappers. Most of them were offbeat and had no style whatsoever. You were just praying that he wasn’t a wannabe rapper inside your head.

“Oh hell no!” He said dramatically. “Ma, I have a record deal. I’m the real thing.”

“Oh really?” You said sarcastically. “Lemme listen to one of your songs them.”

He handed you his airpods and unlocked his phone. He went to his music app and clicked on an album. 

“You ready?” He asked.

You put his airpods into your ears and gave a thumbs up. He hit the play button and put his phone back into his pocket. As you listened to his song, you were in love. Rap wasn’t really your go-to, but you couldn’t lie; is was a whole bop.

When the song was over, you handed his airpods over to him and he clipped them back unto his belt loop on his pants.

“So, how was it?”

You stopped and looked over to him.

“What’s your rapper name?”

He chuckled.

“Killmonger.”

“Well, Killmonger...” You said slowly, which made his shift a little bit.

“That was amazing.”

“Why thank you Y/N.” He said sarcastically.

----------

The shopping was over and you two were overflowed with bags. You had like two small bags while Erik carried fifteen large bags from different stores. It was getting pretty late so you two decided to call it a night. You and Erik made it to his car, put the bags in the backseat, and got into the car. Erik sat still for a second before turning towards you.

“Gimme your phone.” He said with a blank face.

“Why?”

“Because if you want to go on another shopping spree, then you can just call me and i’ll put it in my schedule.” He said with a smile.

“Okayy.” You gave him your phone and he put his number in. He gave you your phone back and smirked. 

You opened the contacts app and found a new contact; “Sugar Daddy 😈💵🖤”

“Nigga I know you didn’t-”

“But I did.” He started the car.

“And don’t think about changing it, either!”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

“anndd... That’s how I met him.” You looked down to see Erik fast asleep on your thigh with his arm still wrapped around your waist. You looked up to look at the comments for a few seconds:

‘sugar daddy?? he was wildin back then-’

‘ya’ll cute or whateva😗’

‘where is erik? he just disappeared-’

“Erik’s still here, he’s just asleep on my lap.”

‘AWWW’

‘But didn’t he say in one of his songs, “We niggas dont sleep??” That’s how you KNOW niggas be lying.”

You chuckled and started to stroke the side of his face, which made him smile in the sleep a little.

“Alright guys, I’m going to end the live here. Bye!” You whisper-yelled to the phone.

‘byee!’

‘Awh... Byee!!’

‘take care!’

‘Don’t forget to call a homeboy up if homie isn’t treating you right 😉😜😏’

You rolled your eyes and ended the live.

All that was left to do was to get Erik on the bed.

Oh boy..

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

ya’ll don’t know how much fun im having with this series-

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

taglist: @mccrps​ @dr-haze​ @imadreamysoul​ @teehjayy​ @pastelastronomy24​ @regulartuan​ @enigmaticaphrodite​ @srirachibi​ @queen-with-the-queen-shirt​ @disorganized-mess-xxx​ @fd-writes​ @iamrheaspeaks​ @destinio1​ @keiva1000​ @itsqu33n​ @raysunshine78​ @bugngiz​ @iris-eyez​ @soufcakmistress​ @igorsbby​ @thiccdaddy-mbaku​ @amirra88​ @chaneajoyyy​ @ljstraightnochaser​ @hidden-treasures21​ @elephants-bubbles-brachosauruses 

Let me know if you want to be added to my taglist! <3

#Erik Stevens #black panther #Erik Killmonger #killmonger #black panther x reader #Erik killmonger x Reader #erik killmonger x oc #erik killmonger stevens #black panther killmonger #black banther x oc #killmonger x reader #killmonger fic #killmongeredit #erik stevens x reader #Erik Stevens x oc #erik killmonger stevens x reader #erik killmonger stevens x oc #n'jadaka #n'jadaka x reader #n'jadaka udaku #n'jadaka udaku x reader

[marcholasmoth]

OSRR: 2386

okay so i just got the sweetest asks today?????? they're right below this and i'm cryin, i don't deserve you guys ;-;

okay so like,

today was pretty good. at first.

i went on an adventure to the apple store with joel and i even got to hold his hand as we walked through the mall (bc i was walking so slowly bc knee hurt but i wasn't about to question it) but apparently his allergy to lavender might not just be lavender?? he says perfume is spicy air to him??? so. allergy.

anyway, he got himself a new watch today. he really loves it. i'm glad. otherwise i'd need to kidnap it.

we got lunch from friendly's - he didn't realize there was one still around until i said something. when talking about lunch options, he said "i didn't realize there was a pizza hut around here," and i said, "yeah, it's just across the street from friendly's." his eyes got all big and he just went "WHAT" and i said "friendly's it is!" so we got chicken tendies and mini mozzarella sticks and fribbles for lunch. (idk if anyone doesn't know what a fribble is, but it's a friendly's milkshake, as opposed to a frappe, which is thicker.) (terminology is very important.) (even though a milkshake implies shaking milk, and that's just silly.)

but we went back to his house and watched tv for a while. we started watching eureka together since i wasn't terribly far in and everyone else i started watching with has already gone ahead and watched all of it without me.

the rest of this is like. not so good. so tw for depression, suicidal ideation, self-harm, and self-hatred from here on out, but also like, some good points for therapy.

--

around 7 i realized i needed to be home, so i went home. i was supposed to spend the evening playing diablo ii with andrew, but heading home meant i couldn't do that, and i felt pretty crummy about it, and i realized that my actions caused him to feel like an afterthought. which is the last thing i want him to feel like. he's one of my bestest friends, and realizing that i hurt him like i did kinda broke something in me. and it just... spiraled from there. (... honestly i almost rammed my car into a cliff face. i took my foot off the gas and hands off the wheel before i could do it though. it's been a long time since i last felt unsafe driving. yikes.) and then i realized what was happening was because of rejection-sensitive dysphoria. but just because of that, doesn't mean it wasn't accurate. that being a shitty friend isn't excusable by saying "i'm a disaster" or "i've been busy" or even "i can't keep things straight in my head" when it's really just all my fault. and there's no excuse to treat a friend like i've been treating him. and then i looked at all of my other friendships and relationships, and i saw that same pathetic disconnection in all of them, because apparently i can't make and keep fucking connections ever. because i don't get attached like normal people do. because i don't feel things like normal people do. because i don't see how my actions affect others like normal people do. and i don't get what i don't get. i'm grateful i have a therapist appointment in a little over a week. i should put a list together of things i need help with.

when i got home i was sure to send him a text and tell him how sorry i was because goddamnit if i can't be a good friend then what the fuck can i be, huh??? if i can't be a good fucking person what good things do i deserve???? none, that's fucking what. and as i drove home i started beating myself up over it. literally. when i got home, i did the same thing. it's been a long time since i last hit my head or slapped myself or punched something, never mind my own jaw. and as i was driving as i smashed my fist into the steering wheel repeatedly i said "no fucking wonder you don't have life insurance" because - surprise! - i got denied life insurance back in april or whatever when i got my new car insurance.

jesus fucking christ, even when i got home i just. couldn't handle it. my dad got me flowers for valentine's day - he always gets us stuff for valentine's day. it's always been a thing in my family - we always get things for each other. and i'm pretty sure that's why valentine's day is my favorite holiday. (i thought to myself after the cliff face passed me how awful it would be for people to process i killed myself the day before my favorite holiday, rip) but anyway, when i saw the flowers, i couldn't even continue into the room to watch tv with my parents. i just started crying again. i didn't stop crying until like 9pm. i got to give my parents their chocolates i got for them too, and i honestly didn't get to see their reactions because i took off my glasses before so i'd stop fucking crying on them. and it all just hurt so much. because i don't fucking deserve the kind things people do for me because i'm not a good fucking person. goddamn it. like, i get this is fucking stupid. "oh you're not a bad person" good people don't do what they do and not concern themselves with what others feel, especially when it's their closest friends. good people don't fucking fall apart at the slightest sign of something being wrong. good people don't fucking hurt their loved ones. so fuck if i'm a good person, because i'm fucking not. and i hate that. because if i'm not, i'm nothing. i have nothing going for me. at all. i'm really just a shit human who doesn't deserve good things. fuck.

(goddamn i'm trying, but fuck if i'm succeeding.)

but eventually, i calmed down enough to watch tv. endgame was on by then.

i didn't really eat dinner. i got my mom food from mcnaldos and i feel bad because i transferred money to my account from here to get us both dinner but then i determined i didn't deserve it so i just got her food. i determined i deserved pain so i thought about canceling my orthopedist appointment for tuesday and stopping wearing my knee brace because i deserve the pain. i inflict it on others, so i deserve it myself. found the passing thought of trying to purposefully get corona or how to best tie myself up in tarps to keep my brains from splattering everywhere. driving home... was Bad. hence this. i also half-heartedly started making a list of passwords and accounts i'd need to write down for people to notify others of my death, of how to say goodbye without causing much notice.

jesus fucking christ i have problems.

and now reflecting on it it still makes sense to me. so i apologize to everyone. i'm a disaster and i'm sorry you gotta see me like this.

there's really no need to worry - i won't act on anything. that's just not something i'm brave enough to do. i'm a fucking coward, and that's something you can count on. i cry when people's voices are raised. anyone who thinks i can take the fast train to deadville via the fuckthis express doesn't know how much of a fucking coward i am lmao

fuck this though, fuck living. i'm so bad at it.

#depression tw #suicide mention tw #self loathing tw #self hate tw #car crash tw #didn't happen but it's mentioned #molly rambles #operation srr #osrr #2000s #2300s #sunshine boy

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #453

“you can check out any time you like, but you can never leave”

What health problems run in your family? Diabetes, high blood pressure and cholesterol, depression, cancer, a LOT more that I'm forgetting. Where did you last have sex? I have zero memory of the last time that was, so I wouldn't know. But probably a bed? How long have you known your best friend? Since we were around 8 and 11. What’s something people criticize you the most for? That I rely on the computer too much. Are spiders scary? I mean some are, but they're also extremely fascinating animals that I really enjoy observing. Cheetos. Poofy or regular? Regular, for sure. The poofy ones get stuck in your teeth SO badly. What's your favorite music genre? Heavy metal. Be honest. What are you most afraid of? Doing nothing with my life. What's your favourite type of survey to take? The ones with really random questions that you don't see in every single one. However, I don't like "random" to where the questions are just inapplicable to almost everyone. I also enjoy questions that allow me to vent about stuff I have going on. If I'm in the right mood, deep questions are great, too. What was the last topic you read about? In detail? I don't know. What shirt do you wear the most? Besides tank tops, my Cloak "equal in our bones" Day of the Dead shirt. What's your go-to order from KFC? I don't eat at KFC. Did you have hand-me-down clothes when you were growing up? Yes. What was the last song you listened to? Well, NOW I'm obsessed with Violet Orlandi's cover of "Hotel California." I keep finding new songs that I just loop for days, man, lol. I'm still not over her "The Unforgiven" cover. Did you have long hair as a young kid? I did. How many songs do you know by the band you are listening to? I'm still listening to Violet's "Hotel California" cover, which is originally by The Eagles. I obviously know this song, as well as "Heartache Tonight." Probably more, just those are the two I know and like. What podcasts do you listen to, if any? I don't listen to any. What was your most recent binge watch? Gab Smolders' playthrough of Final Fantasy X. What’s the oldest thing currently in your house? Hell, possibly my bed frame. I don't know. If you use Snapchat, do you post to your story or send individual snaps more often? I don't have one. When was the last time you rolled your eyes? At what? Not too long ago. Mom said something that really annoyed me. Do you like mozzarella sticks? No. If you had to name one of your children after a friend, solely based on their name alone, who would you choose? Probably Alon. Everything about her is beautiful, ha ha. Have you ever watched anime porn? I can confidently say I have not... Are ladybugs cute? Yes! Would you wear something made from snake skin? Fuck no. I won't wear anything that comes from an animal. Will you leave the house without fragrance on? Yeah, idc. What’s the coolest thing you’ve ever done for a significant other? In art class, I made an anatomically correct heart out of clay and put it in a shadow box along with a poem as the background. I honestly really hope Jason still has it, because I worked my ass off on it. What do you think of naming your son after the father (ex. Roy Jr.): It's not my business what other parents name their kids, but for me personally, I really don't like it. Like... give your child their own identity. It also feels kinda arrogant to me? Like are you so important that you have to force your name onto your kid? Do you like Death Cab For Cutie? I only know "I Will Follow You Into the Dark," which I adore. Do walking near or past cops make you feel uncomfortable? Yes. I just feel like I'm doing something wrong somehow. Do you think stretching (or gauging) your ears is disgusting? When they get to a certain size, to me it is. Small ones are no biggie. What piercing or body modification do you think is really gross? Oh my god, those corset piercings people get on their backs. Just... no. What would you do if your bf/gf told you they were going into the army? I'd be fucking devastated, in a hypothetical relationship where we're serious. What is the nearest gas station called? Uhhhh... I forgot lol. The second-closest though, which is almost like, RIGHT beside the other one, is Sheetz. Do you think bearded dragons are cute? omg YES!!!!!!!! What is your father’s best friend’s name? Do you know them personally? I have no idea. Ever have a dream you’re being abducted by aliens? Was it scary? No. Are you someone who tends to take a whole lot of naps? Too many, honestly. I'm just like... always tired. What is your favorite nickname you like to be called? Why do you like it? Hm. My favorite I've ever had was "Bee," which Megan called me, but I don't like others calling me that. Ever meet someone whose house has burned down spontaneously? Yes, in middle school. Why aren’t you pursuing the person you like? I kinda am. I reached out to him. What part of a person’s body do you find most attractive? Guys: shoulder blades. Girls: hips. Any friends that you’d go on a date with? Yeah. I think I want to try that with Girt and see how it goes and decide what the fuck I want. Is it cute when someone calls you babe? It's funny, I used to hate that, but now I imagine I wouldn't mind? Do you like Muse? Yeah! "Unnatural Selection" and "Psycho" are especially BANGERS. What’s your favorite flavor of jello? Strawberry. What song is stuck in your head right now? I'm bingeing the absolute fuck outta the song I mentioned earlier, ha ha. Do you have a niece or nephew? I have a lot, but only three I see regularly. Have you ever been caught doing something REAL embarrassing by your parents? idk What did you receive for Valentine’s Day? I think Mom got me a chocolate bar? When was the last time you went to a cemetery, and why were you there? I want to say this was many years ago when I went with Colleen to her church. Her stillborn brother was buried there. Have you ever owned a plant? What was it? I grew habaneros once, along with some sort of succulents from Colleen. What was the most interesting animal you have seen in the wild? I saw a mink jump into the river once when I was out fishing with Dad at our favorite spot. Were you born in the state you live in? Yep. Always lived here. What’s a smell that makes you feel ill? Dog shit. Do you like to sleep? Yes and no. I like falling asleep if it's quick, because I'm all comfy, but I also dread sleep because of my nightmares. Even with my mask, they're starting to become regular again. After last night's, I am legitimately beginning to fear something is psychologically wrong with me. Like, I cried to my mom. Do you like the smell of gasoline? Ugh, no. It gives me a headache. Have you lost contact with anyone you wish you haven’t? Many people. Did you give anyone his/her first kiss? No. Should you ever have gone to the hospital but didn’t? Vice versa? No. Who do you miss the most? Jason. What do you miss the most? Being happy. What is your birthstone? Do you have any jewelry with it? Amethyst. I have a really cute guardian angel pin with one given to me by my grandmother. What is the last dream you remember having? Last night was... awful. I remember Mom and I getting in a MASSIVE fight, and also literally yelling at my late beloved dog something about crushing his head in if he didn't stop barking. Like I mentioned earlier, I'm really scared something is really wrong with me. Have you had a church confirmation, bar/bat mitzvah, or something similar? Growing up Roman Catholic, I had a Confirmation ceremony. What was the last baby animal you saw? I wanna say a puppy on Facebook. A friend just got one.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''hotel california'' by the eagles

[ofsinnersandsaints]

palate cleanser (aka rebound sex)

rating: E total word count: 5596 one shot

Raven divorces her cheating husband, and after everything is finalized, she fucks her divorce attorney who is none other than John Murphy.

AO3

Raven hated that she was here, that she had to do this at all, but after finding out her husband of eight years was cheating on her, what else was she supposed to do? He’d begged her to stay, to work it out, telling her over and over how he was willing to fight for them.

She’d almost been convinced by that until she remembered he was the reason all of this had happened in the first place. If he’d really wanted to fight for them, he wouldn’t have given into temptation and broken his marriage vows.

Jesus, he’d signed a fucking rental lease with his girlfriend and now he wanted to fight for their marriage?

Bullshit.

Feeling more certain about her decision she texted Bellamy to let him know she was there. He was the one who had recommended the lawyer she was about to see, they’d apparently gone to school together and Bellamy said he was the guy to go to.

I’M HERE. JUST WAITING. ANYTHING I NEED TO KNOW BEFORE I MEET HIM?

BELLAMY: HE CAN BE AN ASSHOLE, BUT SOMETIMES IT’S GOOD TO HAVE AN ASSHOLE IN YOUR CORNER

Raven smiled as she typed out a response.

THAT’S WHAT I TELL PEOPLE ABOUT YOU!!

He sent back an emoji rolling it’s eyes and Raven was plotting a response when the receptionist called from her desk. “Mr. Murphy will see you now.”

Grabbing her jacket and big purse she walked down the short hallway to the door which said MURPHY on the frost glass, but before she could knock it opened. The man in front of her was a few inches taller than her, his posture relaxed, but his eyes were serious. For some reason when she looked at him, she thought of a 1950s greaser in a leather jacket and combat boots lounging in a booth diner.

“Raven Collins?”

She nodded and took his offered hand before he gestured for her to come into his office. “Bellamy told me you were looking to get divorced, is that right?”

Divorced, what an awful word, but she nodded again and finally found her voice. “Yes. Do you do a lot of them?”

“Enough of them,” he answered as he settled at the little table in the corner rather than his desk. Grateful, because it made the entire thing feel less formal, Raven sat across from him. “I’m a jack of all trades type of lawyer. I do a little bit of everything. What’s the reason for the divorce?”

“Infidelity.”

He nodded, but she was pretty sure she heard him mutter ‘ass’ under his breath as he made a note on his legal pad. She’d always pictures lawyers as cold and heartless, maybe a little formal, but she wasn’t getting any of those vibes from him. She wondered how long it would take for him to be an asshole.

“How long were you together?”

“Fifteen years, but we were only married for eight.”

“You meet him when you were twelve?” he joked.

“Eleven, actually.” He’d been the only person in her world for years, and Raven was just now beginning to understand how bad that was. “We married when we were eighteen. I worked, I’m a mechanic.”

“That’s hot.” The observation was so casually tossed out Raven almost missed, and he was grinning at her when she met his gaze. “That’s not professional to say.”

Okay, that was a little assholey because it wasn’t an apology, but Raven decided she wasn’t offended. Whoever this man, he didn’t appear to be the kind who kept his thoughts to himself which was refreshing after years of trying to understand Finn. “He went to college, I helped pay for some of it, and now he’s a strategist for a politician.”

She didn’t know why she was telling him this, he didn’t ask. He probably didn’t need to know her life story in order to get divorced but she was feeling particularly vulnerable and he was nearby. It probably wasn’t the first he’d had someone dump emotional baggage on him.

“Wife in town, girlfriend in DC?” he guessed.

Raven hated how easy it was for him to figure out what had taken her years. “Yes.”

He nodded and leaned back in his seat, resting his hands on his stomach as he watched her. “How badly do you want me to kick his ass?”

The question was enough of a surprise she blinked at him. “What?”

“There’s a more polite way to word the question, but you don’t seem the type to want to tiptoe around.”

“No,” at least she wasn’t anymore.

“What’s the endgame you’re looking for,” he asked. “After you file for divorced do you want to split everything down the middle and call it good? Or would you rather do whatever you have to do in order to get it done quickly? Or do you want to squeeze his balls until he calls uncle?”

“I don’t know, to be honest,” Raven said even as she laughed at the image. “I didn’t know squeezing his balls was an option.”

“It is.” He pushed his notepad to the side. “You paid for him to go to college, and now he’s what, spending the money on his girlfriend? That’s a dick move. If you want to get out quick, I get it, and we can make that happen, but if you want something else let me know.”

“I want my own shop,” she told him, shocking herself.

That had been her private dream, something she had mentioned to Finn only once or twice, something she hadn’t even told Bellamy about. And yet for some reason she was telling a complete stranger.

“Your own shop?” he repeated, making more notes. “You mean your own mechanic’s shop.”

“Yes,” she answered because he had taken the admission in stride, hadn’t looked surprised or wary of a woman owning her own place. Raven was beginning to wonder if anything phased him. “I was hoping once Finn, my husband, got a job we could start paying down some of the student loans so I’d be able to start my own place. It never happened.”

“How much does he make?”

“A lot.”

He nodded and made a note. “Do you have financial information?”

When she’d made the appointment she’d asked what she should bring and they’d basically said everything you’ve ever done during your marriage so she pulled out the manilla envelope from her massive purse and handed it to him. “Yes.”

“Prepared, I approve.” He took the package and leaned back to drop it on his desk, then leaned back in his chair to grab a business card. “And I’ll get started on the papers. What address would be the best place to serve him at?”

She knew the address of his apartment in DC, the one he’d shared with his girlfriend, but she didn’t know if he was still staying there. She wondered what he’d tell his colleagues about the divorce. If even told them about it at all. “Can you serve him at his job?”

He laughed so hard Raven was a little worried he was going to fall out of his chair. “Hell yes, I can. I think we’re going to get along just fine Mrs. Collins.”

“Reyes,” she corrected, knowing she was going to go back to maiden name the moment she could. “It’s Reyes.”

Murphy smiled like he understood, leaning forward with his hand out. “Nice to meet you, Raven Reyes.”

Murphy was walking through the bar on his way out when he spotted Raven sitting by herself at the one of the high tables. She was wearing a simple black dress and her hair was down, which he’d never seen before, and before he realized what he was doing he was walking towards  her. “Raven.”

She looked up, a bright smile covering her face when she recognized him, and immediately Raven got off the chair and reached out to hug him. “What are you doing out on a school night?”

The casual affection surprised him, set him a little off balance, but he’d made a career out of pretending to be unaffected. “Job offer,” he answered.

“Are you heading out? Do you want a drink?” she gestured to the chair next to hers and without thinking too closely about why, he sat. “What kind of job offer?”

Murphy grabbed a waitress and put in an order for a beer before turning back to Raven. Her hair was much longer than he’d realized, nearly touching her lap as she sat next to him. Combined with the glossy lips and hint of cleavage, she was drop dead gorgeous. “There’s a firm here in town who wants me to join up.”

“Are you going to accept the offer?”

He thanked the waitress when she dropped the glass and bottle at the table, but he drank straight from the bottle. “Nope. I like being my own boss, and I have a problem with authority, so I’d likely just get myself fired. But it was nice to be asked.”

She laughed and lifted her martini to her lips.

“Are you out celebrating?”

“First chance to toast the divorce,” she explained. “I was working my ass off last week and was too tired.”

Murphy looked around the bar. “Are you here with anyone?”

“Nope,” she popped the ‘p’ as she answered. “I don’t have a lot of friends anymore. Bellamy would have come out, but he hasn’t been able to get away from work.”

“That’s depressing, Reyes.”

She grinned, as she always did, when he called her by her maiden name. “I’m aware, but I have mozzarella sticks coming so it’ll be less depressing then.”

“Got any plans for your settlement money?”

He’d managed to get more than enough from the cheating son-of-a-bitch to set Raven up for years. Instead of Finn paying back the money Raven had spent while he’d been going to school, Murphy had convinced him to pay the attorney fees, and then a large lump sum which was big enough to make her ex blanche.

“I’m still thinking about the shop,” she admitted. “There’s a place not far from here, it’s a good spot, good space. Wouldn’t take much work to get it up and running.”

“What are you going to call it?”

“I don’t know, Reyes?” she shrugged. “There’s no reason to get fancy about it.”

The food came then and Raven pushed the plate between them. “I know you just had dinner, but have at these if you want.”

Murphy ate one and could feel Raven’s eyes on him the entire time. “I know I’m sexy, Reyes, but the staring isn’t exactly subtle.”

“Is our professional relationship over?”

It wasn’t the question he’d been expecting but he nodded. “Yeah. Finn’s in charge of paying me, and you’re officially divorced, so my part is done. Why?”

She bit her lip which was distracting. “I came here to pick up someone.”

Every rational thought he’d ever had, and granted there weren’t a lot to begin with, disappeared as she made the admission. “Oh.”

“Finn was the only person I’d ever been with,” she admitted, meeting his gaze. “And – I can stop oversharing.”

He absolutely did not want her to stop because he had a pretty good idea what was coming at the end of the conversation and he desperately wanted to get there. “We don’t have attorney-client privilege,” he managed to get out. “But if you’re about to tell me about your sex life, you can’t just leave me hanging like that.”

She smirked and took another drink from her glass. “Sex with Finn was okay, and I thought our relationship was good enough the rest didn’t matter.”

“But you’re starting to think it matters,” and if he was half hard already, no one would be able notice from where he was sitting.

Raven nodded. “At the vey least I want a palate cleanser.”

Murphy put his arms on the table and leaned forward, keeping his voice down so anyone walking by wouldn’t be able to hear him. “Raven, if this conversation isn’t going to end with you asking me to fuck you, please tell me now. I’d rather disappoint my dick sooner rather than later.”

She rubbed her lips together and nodded. “That’s where this was going, yeah.”

He reached into his back pocket and dropped way too much money on the table; he’d been a waiter while getting through school, he knew how much it sucked. “Your place or mine?”

“Yours,” she answered, sliding off the chair. “Are you good to drive?”

“I didn’t drink at dinner and didn’t finish the beer,” he assured her, putting his hand low on her back to guide her out of the restaurant. “Did you drive?”

“No,” she shook her head. “I wasn’t sure how much alcohol it was going to take to get up the nerve to hit on someone.”

He stopped walking and studied her. “You’re not drunk, are you?”

“Just the one drink, and it takes a hell of a lot more than that to get me drunk.”

Satisfied he walked with her to the parking lot and stopped at his car, unlocking it as soon as he was close enough. “This is me,” and since she was already opening her door he wasn’t going to push her out of the way just for chivalry points.

“Did you have anything in particular in mind?” he asked as he started the engine.

“In mind?” she asked he pulled onto the street.

“For the fucking,” he reminded her and blatantly put his hand so high up on her thigh the only thing keeping him from cupping her was the stretch of the dress across her lap. “I’d hate for you to be disappointed.”

Her gaze was staring at his hand, but he didn’t do anything more. He wasn’t sure if she was skittish or just nervous, but he didn’t want to push it. Not yet anyway.

“I don’t know.”

“Come on,” he encouraged. “You’ve got to have had some fantasies. I’ll go first, my favorite thing to get off to is fucking someone in my office.”

She turned to look at him, and he couldn’t tell because it was too dark in the car, but he was pretty sure she was turned on. Something about the air between them had changed, electrified. “Your office?”

“Yeah, someone comes to bring me lunch and it turns out she’s not wearing any underwear and just came over for a quickie on the desk.” He lowered his voice as they came to a stoplight, “You have to be quiet, you know? Because there’s other people around you don’t want to get caught.”

The streetlights let him see her swallow and nod. “I always wanted to get fucked from behind.”

He was immediately hard as stone but tried keep his voice casual as he drove towards his apartment. “Dickwad wouldn’t do it?”

“Once, but he said he didn’t like it.”

“It’s an ego thing,” Murphy scoffed, because he’d met the man who was dumb enough to lose Raven Reyes. “If you’re not looking at his pretty face than you might forget who’s inside you. But don’t worry, you won’t forget who’s fucking you. I talk a lot.”

“Dirty talk?”

“Filthy talk,” he corrected with a grin. “There’s a subtle, but important difference.”

Raven shifted on the seat, her hand moving his until it was just under the hem of her dress. A wave arousal hit him so hard he nearly groaned. “Give me an example.”

“Dirty talk is like ‘I’m going fuck you with my fingers until you’re desperate to come,’” he explained, his finger twitching against the bare skin of her thigh. “Filthy talk is more ‘I’m going to bury my fingers in your wet pussy until my hand is soaked and you’re begging to come and then you’re going to lick your arousal off me so you know how good you taste.”

She was breathing hard, her hips moving so slightly he wouldn’t know except for the hand he had on her. “You’re right, there’s a difference.”

“Are you wet, Reyes?”

“Yes.”

“Good.”

Raven was almost unbearably aroused by the time Murphy opened the door to his apartment. After he’d asked her if she was wet they’d spent the rest of the car ride in silence, but his hand has been an ever present weight on her thigh. It was a tease, a promise, and it would have been entirely to dangerous for him to finger him while he drove, but she’d nearly broken and asked him to touch her.

“Want anything to drink?” he asked as he tossed his keys in the general direction of his couch.

“No.”

He turned to face her, “Nervous?”

Raven thought about the question seriously and was surprised to find she wasn’t. “No.”

“Raven Reyes,” he grinned with a shake of his head. “You’re a badass.”

“Thank you.”

“When was the last time you had an orgasm?”

“Last week.”

He snorted. “When was the last time you had an orgasm that made your toes curl?”

“A while,” she admitted.

“The original plan was to bring you here, bend you over the kitchen table and immediately fuck you senseless.” She liked how calm and casual he was about all this, like they’d been planning on eating in but he’d changed his mind at the last minute. He put his hands in his pockets and watched her. “But I have a feeling you’ve got a hell of a lot of need bottled up inside that amazing body of yours.”

Raven shrugged. She’d been honest with him earlier when she’d said sex with Finn had always been fine, but the kind of wild and rough sex he was talking about was something they’d never come close to. She was beginning to suspect there was a deep well of desire in her she’d never even touched, but she’d bet her divorce money Murphy would be able to find the bottom.

“You’re probably right.”

“Come here,” and it should have sounded like an order but instead it reached her ears like a suggestion, a seduction, and Raven pictured herself as the fly being lured into a web. She moved towards him, but he didn’t kiss her like she’d been expecting, instead he ran his hands over every part of her body. Down her back, over her ass, the briefest caress over her breasts.

“I’m not going to lie, I pictured fucking you in my office.”

She was surprised. She’d always been weirdly attracted to him, like the high schooler in her recognized had a former bad boy, but she hadn’t been aware the attraction and been reciprocated. “You did?”

His hand slid up between her thighs. “A couple of times. After you came by to finalize everything I went home and pictured you on your knees, but that’s a pretty basic male fantasy.”

“Do you want me to-“ she started but he was already shaking his head.

“You’re here to get fucked, Reyes, that’s the priority.”

Murphy reached under her dress and pulled down her underwear and she was just a little irritated because those had been expensive and sexy and he hadn’t even seen her in them. Then his hand was between her legs again the irritation melted away.

“I can’t wait to see my cock sliding into your pussy,” he told her and while she’d never pictured herself as the type to enjoy filthy talk, Murphy was quickly bringing her over to his side of thinking. The images his words conjured were enough to make her squirm. “But I want to see what you look like when come.”

She felt a finger brush against her and Raven swayed on her heels. “Let me take my shoes off.”

He didn’t move his hand so as she shifted to kick off her heels the contact moved and changed in unexpected ways.

“You’re soaked, Reyes,” he murmured against her temple, the tip of his finger finding the slit of her folds and shifting so gently and slowly it barely counted as moving. “Is all this just for me, or would you get this wet for anyone?”

Raven reached up to hold onto his shoulders, not trusting her balance. “Just for you.”

As if rewarding her for the answer he increased the pressure of his finger, sliding through the slickness and circling her entrance but going nowhere near her clit which was now needy for him. “You’re going to come so quickly, aren’t you? You’re not even going to make me work for it.”

Desperate to get more contact Raven reached behind her and slid the zipper down so she could push the fabric down to her hips. His finger paused for just a moment as he looked her breasts, barely encased in a nearly see-through lace bra.

“Fuck,” he murmured as he reached up to roughly touch her. His hand covered her, kneading the flesh, pinching the nipple. “Take it off, I want to see you.”

“Give me a finger,” she negotiated.

His grin was quick and sharp, full of amusement and hunger. “Fair is fair.”

The intrusion was slow and welcomed, her inner muscles instinctively trying to clench around him. It wasn’t enough, but it was more than she’d had in months, so she unhooked the bra and dropped in on a nearby chair.

“I’ve been wondering for weeks what color your nipples are,” he told her, and now that there wasn’t anything separating his hand from her body, the contact was nearly electric. The nail of his thumb scraped against the hard bud, and while she didn’t understand his fascination, she enjoyed knowing he’d fantasized about her too. “You’re gorgeous.”

When she reached for his shirt he shook his head. “In order to this off I’d have to move my hand and I’m not doing that until you come. How many fingers can your pussy take?”

She didn’t think that was a question which actually required an answer so she simply reached beneath his shirt to press her palms against his back. His skin was impossibly hot beneath her touch.

Murphy leaned forward and took one of her nipples into his mouth the same instant his finger began to move inside her.

All train of thought was lost.

She moved against him, but her rhythm was erratic because he wasn’t matching his movements. He’d lick her nipple and then drive his finger deep into her, but never at the same time. It was a constant stream of stimulation with the background of his voice telling her all the things he wanted to do to her.

“That’s right, Reyes, fuck my hand.”

“Another finger,” she told him. “I need more.”

She’d barely finished the sentence before two fingers began to slightly stretch her. Since she’d found out about Finn cheating on her she’d taken solace with her vibrator, but the little thing was meant just for clitoris stimulation. It had been a while since anything, or anyone, had been insider her.

When he pulled out and then slid back in again she didn’t hold back the moan.

“Fuck, that was hot,” he muttered half a second before he kissed her.

The contact was a shock, which Raven realized was ridiculous because he was literally finger fucking her, a kiss should hardly feel more intimate. His lips were dry and insistent, his tongue a warm pressure against the seam of her mouth.

She opened for him, the sweep of his tongue a demanding thing and she responded in kind. It was a sexy, sloppy kiss, and Raven wondered how he managed to do so many things to her at once. His fingers drove her closer to orgasm even as his mouth plundered.

“Another one,” he asked against her mouth and she nodded.

Murphy tugged at her dress, pulling it up so the entire thing was above her hips. “I want to see it,” he told her, and his voice sounded as wrecked as she felt. “Let me hear you, Reyes.”

Raven could feel his fingers sliding out of her, her fingers gripping so tight on his shoulders she wondered if she might leave bruises behind. Then three of his fingers were pushing in her and she gasped at the feel of them.

“You good,” he asked, voice tight as he dragged his eyes away from her pussy to her face. She kissed him and then nodded.

“It’ll be better when it’s your cock.”

His eyes went blazing hot, his fingers filling her so quickly and roughly she nearly came right then. “Oh my, God.”

“You’re so close,” he encouraged. “Another night, I might drag it out, make you so needy you forget how to talk but I need to be pounding into before I come in my slacks. If you come, Reyes, we both get what we want.”

Raven nodded but she needed more, “My clit.”

He wrapped his arm around her waist to keep her upright. “Do it yourself, I want to watch you touch yourself while you get off on my fingers.”

She moved her own hand between them, her fingers brushing against his wrist. When she touched her clit her whole body jerked at the pressure, “Oh my god.”

“That’s it, don’t be gentle.”

His fingers continued to pump into her as she pressed against the hard nub of her arousal, and her orgasm was like a tsunami, crashing into her with almost nowhere.

“Fuck,” she yelled as her entire body went tight with the force of the climax.

Murphy’s hand shined from Raven’s arousal, and while he’d told her in the car she’d lick it off of him, he knew he didn’t have that kind of time. Desperate need clawed inside, so raw and primal it felt like drowning; he needed to be inside her or he’d die.

He pushed the dress off her body and turned her around to face the kitchen table. “Bend over,” he ordered, as if he had any control over what was happening. When she put her elbows on the wood, her ass stuck out and the only reason he didn’t come right then was because he wanted to be inside her.

Stubbornness had always been his strong suit.

“Don’t move, I’m getting a condom.”

“My bra,” she said, her voice cracked. “I had a condom in my bra.”

Looking down he found the foil pack on the ground near his feet and tore it open carefully. Not wanting to waste any time, he pulled his cock out of his pants and left the rest of his clothes intact. Once the condom was on, he used the slickness on his hand to lube it. “Ready?”

“Yes.”

It was the only word he needed to hear.

Murphy stepped up behind her, put one hand on her hip and used the other to guide his erection to her entrance. “I’m going to try and give you another orgasm,” he promised. “But I’m so fucking turned on I don’t know how long I’ll last.”

“It’s fine,” she assured him, her hips moving back.

He moved the hair from her back so he could kiss the place at the base of her neck. “Do you mind if I pull on your hair?”

Murphy waited while she thought about it. “If I change my mind?”

“Just say stop,” he assured her, trying to remain just a little bit sane with the tip of his cock between the folds of her vagina. “That’s goes for everything.”

She nodded again and he ran his fingers down her spine so he could grip her hips with both hands. “Rough, right?”

“Don’t hold back.”

Taking her at her word he took a deep breath and buried himself to the hilt in one thrust.

She let out a strangled cry and he was about to check in with her when she moved back, pressing her ass into his crotch. “I don’t think you have to worry about me not coming again,” she managed to get out between unsteady breaths. “I’m so fucking close already.”

He could feel the muscles surrounding his cock flutter.

“Do you feel that? Feel how deep I am in your pussy?” he asked, rotating his hips to go just a little deeper. “Fuck, you feel good around my cock. So hot and wet, your pretty ass just begging to spanked.”

“Do that, and I’ll cut off your dick.”

He laughed but took the warning seriously.

Murphy pulled back and slammed into her again, the gasp of shock and arousal from Raven enough to spur him on. He fucked her over and over, the speed so quick and desperate Raven stopped trying to meet his thrusts and just took it.

In the car he’d bragged about being a filthy talker, but nothing he said could be as erotic and raunchy as Raven bent over the kitchen table taking his cock like they’d been born to fuck just like this.

He shifted her hips, pulling them up a little so she nearly on her toes and this time when he drove into her, he found her g-spot. “Fuck, fuck. Do that again, Murphy, I’ve never felt anything like that.”

Murphy repeated the action and she nearly screamed; the kitchen table moved with the force of their joining, but Raven didn’t appear to notice as she asked, “Didn’t you say something about my hair?”

She was flat on stomach now, and he hoped she wasn’t getting burns on her skin from the friction. He wanted to give her dick, not be a dick.

“Decided you were into it, huh?” He wrapped the long strands of her hair around his fist as he teased her. Murphy pulled her hair just a little until her torso was off the table. “I should have fucked you in front of a mirror.”

“I didn’t even think of that,” she admitted.

“I’d get to see your tits while I fucked you, your face while you come. You’d see how fucking hot you are while I drive into you from behind.”

“Fuck, Murphy. I’m close.”

So was he. Honestly, he should get a fucking metal for not having completely blown his wad by now.

He reached below the table, finding her clit with his hand. The movement forced Raven’s head back, her hair still held in his fist, her back arched and he was truly regretting the lack of a mirror.

His fingers pressed against her clit where he kept his strokes short and rough as he pleasured her to edge.

“There,” she moaned. “Fucking shit, you’re good at this.”

“I was inspired,” he told her honestly. He almost pulled out completely out, timed it so when he thrust in all the way he was pinching her clit at the same time.

“Fuck!” she nearly screamed, her entire body shaking with the force of the orgasm.

She was clenched so tightly around him he could barely move inside her, but he didn’t need much more incentive to come. Raven’s tight pussy was pulsing around him and a few seconds later he exploded inside her.

The orgasm was the strongest one he’d ever experienced and felt never ending.

When he finally managed to catch his breath and come back to his body he released Raven’s hair and all but petted her. He ran his hands down her back, along her ribs and waist, trying to soothe them both after what felt like a near death experience.

“Still with me?” he asked when she didn’t move.

“Yes,” she answered and took a deep breath. “I think I stars with that last one.”

There was more than a little male ego in his smile, so he was glad she couldn’t see it. “I’m going to pull out now and take care of the condom. Bathroom’s down the hall on the left.”

As he tossed out the condom he grabbed a towel and cleaned himself up, keeping an eye on Raven as she walked towards the bathroom. When he was certain she wouldn’t fall over he poured them both a glass of water and had already down his by the time she came back out.

Still naked.

“I don’t have the ability to fuck you again right this moment, but damn does my body want to.”

Her smile was amused but he thought he saw a little bit of a blush on her cheeks. “Right back at you.”

Murphy walked to her and handed her the water while he moved around the room to pick up her clothes so she wouldn’t have to bend over and do it. Getting fucked like that was fine, but no one felt cool picking clothes up off the floor.

“Thanks.” She got dressed in front of him, so he didn’t feel particularly bad about enjoying the view. When she pulled on her dress and turned away from him he took the hint and reached for the zipper.

“Is this a one-time thing, Reyes?” he asked, letting go of the dress and taking a step back.

She pushed her hair back over her shoulder, turning to look him straight in the eye. “I don’t know,” she answered, but there was a twinkle in her eye and mischief at the corner of her mouth. “Maybe I’ll come by for lunch at your office one these days.”

With those words, Murphy was fairly certain he had actually died during that orgasm and was now in heaven.

“Yeah,” and in that moment John Murphy realized he was no longer unaffected. “That’d be cool.”

#murven #the 100 #the 100 fic #murven fic

[icarialex]

Who: Zoey Katz and Kassandra West

When: March 15th

Where: Zoey’s apartment

What: Kassandra seeks comfort from Zoey after running into Aurora.

Kassandra: 

The better part of the day had been spent at the beach in full disassociation mode, that is until she decided to text Zoey. It surprised her that she'd even done that, wanting nothing more than to just go drink her pain away. Or fuck it away. That's how she had learned to cope with the pain of existence, of the hurt that others inflicted. Aurora being here and revealing to her the reason why she'd broken up with her had been a slap in the face. Not to mention adding on the implication that her god-awful mother was way worse than Kassandra had ever realized. Everything about the situation got ten times worse, knowing full well that she'd hated Aurora for things that were out of her control. 

So she texted Zoey, for a distraction or for some semblance of self worth. She wasn't quite sure what it was. But like they had been for a while, the tone shifted and Kassandra found herself dangerously tiptoeing that line of 'will they won't they'. Eventually she made her way to Zoey's house, knocking on the door after sending the last text message. The second that Zoey opened the door, all rational thought was thrown out the window, choosing to ignore the pain in her head and instead wanting to numb it altogether. Without even batting an eyelash, Kassandra picked up Zoey with ease as she kicked the door shut before taking her to the kitchen counter and setting her down on it. Her next step was kissing the blonde heatedly on the mouth, one hand between their bodies to tug on the hem of her shorts while the other gripped gently at the back of Zoey's neck. This probably was a bad idea. Probably.

Zoey: 

Zoey’s mind was a jumbled mess, but she was thankful that she had the distraction of taking care of Kass to take her mind off the thoughts circling her head about whomever arrived on the isle. Warnings went off in her mind because it was obvious how much the person still had some sort of hold over the brunette, but she pushed them down. She believed the words Kass had told her. Even though they hadn’t known one another long, Kassandra had Zoey’s trust until she gave her a reason to take it away. So, instead she focused on grabbing some take out from Wish You Were Beer after making sure to grab Nugget from Kass’ room. Comfort food definitely sounded like a burger, some mozzarella sticks, and French fries. She got a side of onion rings with her own just to add some variety. She wasn’t home long at all when she heard the doorbell ring. She had just enough time to set the food down on her table before making her way over to let the woman in.

The greeting she got wasn’t one she expected at all. Per the course for them both, Zoey quickly let her hormones override her judgement and fell into the kiss. A moan left her as she hooked her legs around the woman’s thighs to keep her as close as possible. The sports bra left so much skin open to her touch which she explored for a few moments before something screamed at her from inside her mind. Perhaps the insecurities and fear she was trying to avoid earlier were to thank for her coming to her senses. Still, her body was calling her a string of unpleasant names she was sure when she managed to pull away from the embrace. “You told me to not let you go where you want this to go,” she said in between labored breaths. “As much as I hate being the sensible one right now, I don’t want you doing something you regret and making things worse.” It was such a far cry from the reasoning and everything they spoke of last time they were in a similar position, but the pace needed to remain the same.

Kassandra: 

Food was here, she could smell it and yet she ignored the hunger pangs in favor of kissing Zoey again. The woman was trying to talk her down, to convince her that she needed to stop and not let this happen but all Kassandra saw was anger and pain and hurt. All of that bled into her like a never-ending wave and the only way she knew how to get it out of her system was to let lust take over. So she'd let Zoey keep talking, her mouth now moving to Zoey's neck as she pressed open mouthed kisses to her skin, scorching her along the way to the shoulder that was exposed before sucking gently on her exposed clavicle. "Don't you want this, Zo?" Her words came out low and breathy, taking her hand to grab one of Zoey's own as she placed it directly on her chest. An eyebrow raised in a challenge as she pulled back, green eyes almost jet black at this point as she took in the sight of Zoey's tousled hair and overall attire. Gods, how was a person this attractive.

Immediately she dove back in, kissing her deeply while moving one of her hands underneath Zoey's shirt to let her fingernails scratch lightly down the other woman's stomach. 'You're a good fuck, Kass, I'll give you that'. The thought infiltrated her mind, remembering the blonde that she had invited to her room all those weeks ago. Tearing her mouth away from Zoey's, she went to Zoey's ear, nipping gently on her earlobe before whispering to her. "I want you..." Her voice was raspy, fully intending on letting out a while timed moan into the other woman's ear when another memory ruined the moment. 'My mom's going to be home soon. Make this quick'. With a low groan, Kassandra pulled back fully from Zoey now, wishing that her guilt would just shut off for one fucking night. She put her head in her hands, eyes slamming shut as she realized she'd just come in here and basically demanded something that she wasn't in the right mind to give. "I'm sorry... I'm so sorry." Kass whispered, pulling her head out of her hands to take a few steps backwards from Zoey, not wanting to meet her gaze.

Zoey: 

When Kass continued to try and move things forward, Zoey knew it wasn’t out of a lack of respect for her. It was a fight or flight response of some sort that she had to find the will power to push through. Her body literally felt like it was on fire. Every part of her wanted to get closer to Kass and just let go of the hesitation. The blonde was truly being honest when she said she didn’t need to wait, but the problem was, Kassandra did. In order for this to be done right, the other woman had to sort through everything that was happening first. Otherwise, whatever they could become would just become collateral damage. “Yes, Kass,” she replied. Denying how much she wanted things to progress wasn’t something she’d do. Still, what she wanted and what they needed were two very different things. 

Hearing the brunette’s voice husk into her ear literally made Zoey curse. The word fuck slipped under her breath as she tried her beast to get clear thoughts to push forward into her brain. Fortunately, something clicked within the other woman which caused her to stop her wonderfully, torturous movements. The blonde wanted to comfort Kass, but she needed to get herself together first. So, she set her palms down on the counter, closed her eyes, and counted to fifteen first. Once she felt like she wasn’t going to combust, and was instead just mildly uncomfortably turned on, she hopped off the counter and walked towards the woman. “Hey,” she said gently as she cupped Kassandra’s cheeks and locked their eyes. “It’s okay. I’m okay, you’re okay, and we’re okay. I promise. I know this is just — it’s you reacting to seeing her,” she said much more calmly than she felt.

Wanting to just help the woman feel better, she moved to intertwine their fingers and tugged her towards the table. “Come on, let’s eat. I took a guess on what you’d want since you told me you weren’t a picky eater, and I figured you’d want comfort type food right now over anything else. At least, that’s how I am when I’m sad.” Sitting across from Kass with her just wearing shorts and a sports bra wasn’t going to work though. That was just torture. “Make yourself comfortable and take out the food, yeah? I’m going to get you a shirt. If I have to look at you like this all dinner, I’ll literally explode. Okay?”

Kassandra: 

Everything about what she'd just done was enough to send her guilt through the damn roof but here Zoey was, mostly calm and still so caring. Fuck. She definitely did not deserve her. "She just came out of nowhere, Zo. I feel so blindsided. And everything felt like it was maybe going to start falling into place and then... And she just ruined it all." Kassandra sighed, looking at Zoey with tears brimming as the other woman cupped her cheeks in her hands. Letting out a deep breath, she nodded her head in agreement, thankful that this beautiful woman in front of her was so careful with her even when she didn't deserve it. As Zoey led her over to the table, fingers interlaced in a far too adorable manner, her stomach gave a loud rumble. "Oh... I guess I should eat. Haven't had anything since breakfast and that was just toast." She chose to avoid Zoey's gaze, sure that she'd give her a stern look now that she let that slip. 

Kassandra sat down in the chair, she reached forward for the burger and immediately took a very large bite. Eyes closed as she moaned softly from the taste, not even realizing just how much that was was probably going to come off as highly inappropriate. Chewing on the food, she rose an eyebrow as Zoey suggested that she needed to wear a shirt. As Zoey left the room to go get her a shirt, Kassandra looked down at her attire and was reminded that she'd gone jogging in this. Gross. Without even really thinking about it, she stood up and took off her sports bra, throwing it over in the corner next to her to-go bag that she'd left over here. Kassandra grabbed the burger once more, shrugging as she took another bite from the burger.

Zoey:

The blonde bit her lip as she tried to think of the right thing to say. It wasn’t like she was an expert when it came to love. “She didn’t ruin everything,” she said cautiously. “What happened in your past is just that, Kass. It doesn’t have to repeat itself. I can’t imagine how those wounds hurt because I’ve been pretty lucky in that department, but at the same time, I’ve never experienced any kind of passionate, need to be around someone kind of love. I’ve played it safe, and well, I can tell you it’s not all sunshine and rainbows on this end of it either,” she said with a small smile and a shrug. While she didn’t pine for a great love or was desperate for that connection that so many people spoke of, that didn’t mean she didn’t think of it. That didn’t mean she didn’t dream of it. Zoey just thought patience would eventually lead her where she needed to be. “You can still do everything you wanted to do when you talked to me. You can work on yourself, you can face those demons, and I can be here when you’re ready. None of that has changed. All that has is that she is now in your zip code.”

“I swear to the Gods, Kassandra West. You need to take better care of yourself if you don’t want me pestering you all the time,” she said with a shake of her head as she made her way towards her bedroom. She nearly stopped dead in her tracks at the sound of a moan, but kept herself in check. Instead, she walked a little faster. For the second time she found herself searching through her drawers for a shirt to lend to Kass, and smiled when she landed on a Pikachu one from one of her many trips to Japan over the years. It was comfortable and adorable, so she settled for that one and headed back into the living room. However, when she caught sight of the woman, she literally froze, inhaled through her nose, and closed her eyes. “Kass,” she said loud enough for the woman to hear. “I don’t know how you see yourself, but I need you to listen to me. You’re so much more to me than just your looks, but holy macaroni Kass, you’re also someone I find so incredibly beautiful. I’m not used to being this attracted to someone that I literally don’t want to keep my hands off of you. So, please, until I can actually do that without messing up anything between us, keep your clothes on.” She ended on a huff as she balled the shirt up and tossed it at the brunette’s head from where she stood. She just arched an eyebrow, crossed her arms, and made it abundantly clear that she wasn’t taking another step forward until Kass was clothed. Her will power would honestly shatter if she didn’t stay rooted where she was.

Kassandra: 

Mid-bite, Kassandra found herself being called out to by Zoey. Opening her eyes in response, she saw the other woman's face with her eyes closed and what looked like a blush tinting her cheeks. Kass smirked at the arched brow, the defensive stance. All of it made heat pool in her belly but then she got smacked in the face with a shirt and remembered that she was standing in Zoey's kitchen with nothing on her top half. Taking another bite of the burger, she chewed it thoughtfully as if weighing her options, noting how the artist seemed to be making no forward momentum to get any closer to her. A pout appeared on her face as she set the burger down. Grabbing the shirt that had fallen to the ground, she began taking steps towards Zoey knowing full well that she was probably going to get a glare. As she passed by the table, she reached out and grabbed a mozzarella stick.

It didn't take long for her to be standing in front of Zoey, a smirk on her lips at the height difference. She was well aware of what was eye level with the other woman. "Holy macaroni is only ever going to be cute when it comes from your lips, babe. Now as for the clothes--I'll put on the shirt. But first, I'm going to need you to eat something. You look absolutely famished. I think I might have even seen a little bit of drool." Kassandra's smirk widened, moving her t-shirt so it was laying along her left shoulder before bringing her now free hand up to trace a thumb along Zoey's lower lip. "Now," She started, holding up the mozzarella stick to wag back and forth in front of Zoey's face. "Can you please make sure you eat something so I can put this shirt on? It's getting kind of nippy in here." Kassandra smiled, a challenge written all over her face, knowing full well that she was being a brat.

Zoey: 

The blonde should have known that Kassandra would do something to further tease her. It was the woman’s M.O. She’d warned Zoey on their date that she hadn’t even seen the tip of the iceberg when it came to her teasing, and well, the brunette was certainly right. Standing in front of the artist still shirtless, was just downright cruel when she couldn’t do anything about it. Still, blue eyes opened when she heard Kassandra’s voice much closer than it should be. “What I look is incredibly turned on,” she retorted back. Zoey lost all shyness as she allowed her blue eyes to very obviously take in everything of the beautiful woman before her. When she’d last seen the brunette naked, she’d been so upset that the artist didn’t allow herself to take in as much as she wanted. It felt like she was taking advantage of the situation. “You’re not making it any easier for me to not drag you into my bedroom right now and let you have your way with me.”

Still, as always seemed to be the case with them, Zoey found herself wanting to play the game laid out before her. So, with boldness she didn’t know she possessed, the blonde said, “bring it closer then,” as she grabbed Kass’ hips and tugged her forward until their bodies touched. Slowly, she took a bite of the offered mozzarella stick, and as she chewed she allowed her hands to glide from the woman’s hips to land on her butt. “Is being closer to me keeping you warmer? Although, I have to say, the effect the cold has on you is something I really enjoy. I might have to just pay a higher electrical bill to keep my house colder at this rate.” The artist gave the flesh beneath her a palms a squeeze before sliding upwards again. They teased Kass’ ribcage and paused for a second on the side of her breasts before going back down to the safety the woman’s hips offered. “I took a bite. Is that satisfactory for you?”

Kassandra: 

The temptation to give into the other woman's words was a struggle but for some insane reason she managed to behave herself. "You couldn't drag me into that bedroom if you tried." Kassandra teased sweetly, knowing full well that while Zoey couldn't do that physically she could definitely just look at her with those eyes of hers and the brunette would be insta-goo. Before she could even remotely know what was happening, Zoey was pulling her closer and suddenly she felt her mouth go dry. Their bodies were now pressed together and--wait--was that a hand on her ass? Blinking slowly, Kassandra looked down to make sure and yes, indeed, that was a hand on her ass. At Zoey's next quip, Kassandra rolled her eyes. It was absolutely adorable that she was somewhat corrupting this blonde or at the very base level of helping her explore her sex-drive side. Never had an orgasm that wasn't self induced? How had she even lived? She hadn't. That was the answer.

Kassandra snorted as Zoey took a bite, going back to her all-too innocent self. So instead of giving a retort, she just nodded triumphantly and extracted herself from the other woman's tangle of limbs. Popping the rest of the mozzarella stick in her own mouth, she grabbed the shirt off her shoulder and threw it on. A smile crossed over her face until she looked down and saw what exactly was on the shirt. "You're kidding me. Zoey. Zoey." Kassandra growled, mostly in a teasing manner and then did a half-hearted attempt at a whine. Even added in a foot stomp for good measure. "I'm a badass. You can't really expect me to wear a Pikachu shirt." Kassandra groaned, moving so she was bending over to rest her forehead on Zoey's shoulder. "A Pokemon is touching my tits. I don't know how I feel about this."

Zoey:

“If I stripped my clothes off while walking to my bedroom, I’m pretty positive you would follow,�� she retorted back with a playful roll of her eyes. When Kassandra was clothes again, Zoey was able to relax a little bit. Honestly, at least when she was partially naked around the brunette it had been by accident since she didn’t expect a visitor at such a late hour. What Kass did was deliberate and just downright mean. She’d get her back eventually. While sweet and innocent, that didn’t mean Zoey could just let gauntlets be thrown and not respond. However, she definitely giggled at Kass’ reaction to the shirt she’d gotten. “Sorry to break it to you sweetheart, but you’re kind of with a girl that draws anime and comics for a living. Cute shirts are part of my wardrobe. Plus, I like you in my clothes.” The with part of her comment could be taken as either they were dancing around something or were just physically together at the moment. The blonde tried to convince herself she didn’t care about one more than the other.

“So vulgar,” she teased as she turned her head to kiss the woman’s cheek. “Now come on. I actually am hungry and want to eat. Also, I can’t believe you’ve ignored your sleeping puppy for so long.” She shook her head playfully as she moved to the sofa and rubbed Nugget’s stomach. It had sort of become the puppy’s permanent space in her apartment, and Zoey loved it. She bent over to place a kiss on his little nose before moving to unpack her own food from the take out bag. “All insane sexual tension aside, are you okay? Can I do anything besides turn you on to help you feel better?” Obviously she was skilled at taking the brunette’s mind off of things, but she did was to help make things easier for when they weren’t together too. She took a bite of her burger and danced in her chair slightly as she waited for Kass to join her.

Kassandra: 

"I said tits," Kass said with a sigh, moving to pet her puppy for a moment before giving him a kiss on the head as she moved past him to go back to the table. "That's not vulgar, you're clearly just a prude." She waggled her eyebrows for a moment before tapping her chin thoughtfully with a finger. "Actually I take that back. No prude would have just grabbed my ass. Somewhere underneath all of that adorable blonde hyperactive sweetheart thing you've got going on... There's a minx. I'll find her. Sooner or later." Her body ached when she sat down, the events of the day clearly catching up to her in that moment. Picking up her burger once more, she took another thoughtful bite before answering. "I'm okay. I'm not great, but I'm okay. It was a shock to the system, seeing her again. I've had this... This picture of her in my head. That she just got to live this fairytale life with the guy she left me for. That her parents loved her unconditionally and never found out that she was ever... With me." 

"I said tits," Kass said with a sigh, moving to pet her puppy for a moment before giving him a kiss on the head as she moved past him to go back to the table. "That's not vulgar, you're clearly just a prude." She waggled her eyebrows for a moment before tapping her chin thoughtfully with a finger. "Actually I take that back. No prude would have just grabbed my ass. Somewhere underneath all of that adorable blonde hyperactive sweetheart thing you've got going on... There's a minx. I'll find her. Sooner or later." Her body ached when she sat down, the events of the day clearly catching up to her in that moment. Picking up her burger once more, she took another thoughtful bite before answering. "I'm okay. I'm not great, but I'm okay. It was a shock to the system, seeing her again. I've had this... This picture of her in my head. That she just got to live this fairytale life with the guy she left me for. That her parents loved her unconditionally and never found out that she was ever... With me." 

Zoey:

A laugh escaped her as Kass tried to explain just what she was. “Your guess is as good as mine. I’m figuring everything out with you as we go. It’s fun,” she said with a shrug. Zoey let very little upset her if she could help it. “But I’m thinking you’re right the more and more we tease one another.” Zoey continued eating as she allowed Kass to get everything off her chest. The idea of hurting someone else to make her life a little easier wasn’t something that sat well with the artist She was well aware that someone would say that she only felt that way because she was never put in that position, but Zoey was always hyper aware of the feelings of others. Her parents were actually worried about how much she could sacrifice her own happiness for that of others. It left her vulnerable and made it easy for the wrong people to take advantage of her. “I can’t say I understand. The idea of hurting you makes me sick to my stomach. I couldn’t ever knowingly do something to protect myself if I knew it would make things worse for someone else. I’d rather hurt with you than leave you hurting alone,” she said with a shrug. “I’ve always cared a lot about those in my circle. My dad jokes it’s a pack mentality thing since I shape shift.” She couldn’t help but roll her eyes playfully at that because it was such an old joke in their family.

“Realizing she didn’t do what you thought and still caring about her isn’t a bad thing,” she said carefully. The conversation was definitely a hard one to navigate for someone who also had feelings involved. Yes, she had feelings for Theo who was an ex, but they were completely platonic. They broke up because of that fact actually. Her limited dating experience made her feel very out of her depth, and she had no idea what someone else having such a grand effect on a person after so long meant in the grand scheme of things. Were there things unresolved? Did learning that things didn’t go the way they were painted to seem change things? Zoey had no idea. “Maybe talking with her when you’re ready and sorting through it more would give you what you need to not be so hurt by it all.” A closure of sorts. Maybe that was what she needed.

When Kass asked her question, blue eyes closed for a moment because she thought her words were taken innocently. After all, they were said before they dove into what was happening. Apparently not though. “You can take that however you’re ready to,” she said with a sigh when she opened her eyes again and locked them with Kass’. “We obviously aren’t officially together, but I’m — I’m not seeing anyone else, and I’m not remotely interested in anyone else. Still, I know putting a label on things now most likely isn’t the right move with everything, and that’s fine. So, you can take that as the girl you’re physically with in this moment, in this house, draws anime and comics so she has a lot of cute shirts in her wardrobe. That’s okay.”

Kassandra:

'You can take that however you're ready to'. Suddenly the distance between them felt too great, Kassandra moving from where she sat to pick up Zoey's chair despite her being sat in it to scooch it back a bit. It's not like she or the chair were heavy, making sure she didn't jostle the blonde too much. Next came clearing the food away from directly in front of Zoey, which of course didn't take too long and then finally she sat on the table in front of the blonde. Her legs dangled from the table, reaching forward with them to wrap her feet around the legs of the chair to bring Zoey closer once more. Once Zoey was back in her orbit, Kass leaned forward to tip the other woman's chin up to look at her. Green eyes found blue as she smiled gently, albeit sadly as she bit down on her lip. Air escaped her lungs in a low puff as her thumb rubbed back and forth against soft skin for a moment before she leaned forward, closing the distance as she placed her lips against Zoey's. It wasn't heated, just a soft kiss that made her heart pound in her chest until she pulled back enough so she could hold the artist's gaze once more.

"I'm thankful that you understand... That this is all a little bit hard for me. I'm not--I don't let people in. Or at least.. I haven't. Not in a long time. For the longest time... Sleeping around... Fucking a body to forget--it was all I knew. Each time I placed my hands on a warm body, my mind went to her. She was my first love. My best friend. I thought she was my soulmate. But then I grew up." She knew what she meant by that, knew that the world and the choices the people around her had made for her had led her down this path. To this person she'd become. "Every time I met someone that I was attracted to, I fucked them. To make it go away. I'd see her and I'd let it hurt. Over and over I tortured myself. And then eventually I stopped seeing her. I grew to hate her. Part of me still does despite today. Because she broke me. Even if it was out of self preservation."

Swallowing thickly, Kassandra looked down at her knees for a moment before finding those blue eyes once more. "I came here because I had nothing left. I wasn't expecting to meet anyone that made me feel something. I wasn't expecting to find you. To be honest, I'm shocked that we connected like we did. It just felt... Natural. Like... Like breathing. Like opening your eyes and you..." She trailed off, eyes searching Zoey's own as she tried to come to grips with how she felt. "Like before there was no color. I came here and I started to see it. In the people around here. In the beauty of this place. In you. But I tried so hard to not let it bleed into me." Kassandra reached down for one of Zoey's hands, bringing her knuckles up to kiss them gently before squeezing them. "And yet I slowly started to want to be better. I fucked people to avoid the truth. To avoid what I felt. For you. And the second I found out that I... That there were real and true feelings--there was no one else. Just you. And... And I know that's not an answer." The brunette cleared her throat, not able to keep her gaze anymore. "I know that my past is here in the form of my ex and I know there's history. I know some part of me still loves her. Despite all the hate. But...What I also know is that when I stop listening to my brokenness and I listen to what I want... What I want is you, Zoey. I just hope that's enough for now."

Zoey:

While she was surrounded on an island filled with people who had extraordinary powers, she wasn’t used to just being lifted and moved like a feather. A light sequel escaped her as she was moved, but she trusted the brunette more than she thought possible through the weeks they’d known one another. The kiss was sweet. So sweet, that Zoey chased after Kassandra to steal another one before leaning back against her chair. “You know, your strength is something that I know I’ll find more and more sexy as time goes on,” she said with a light laugh. While they were having such a serious conversation, Zoey still liked to add some lightness to things. It was something she always did naturally to show that even with the darkest of topics, some lightness could always be found. 

As she heard Kass explain things, Zoey just sat back and listened. She munched on onion rings as she allowed the other woman to get everything she needed to out. A smile graced her features when she heard how much Kass did want her, and that always filled her with warmth. For someone who claimed to be so broken, she did a decently good job of communicating with the blonde. That was something that meant more to her than anything she could actually explain. When everything seemed to be out, and there was an obvious pause in conversation, Zoey took a breath in and slowly released it. An easy smile stayed on her face to show that nothing was ill received. She just — that was a lot to unpack. “You know, I get the sense from how you talk about how you acted with other women that you think you’re disgusting or horrible, and that’s just — it’s not true. You never led women to believe you were offering more than you could which was a one night stand. Anyone that went to bed with you went so willingly and knowing what you wanted. That’s better than some. I can’t find it in my heart to judge you. How could I? Just you talking about your past behaviors this way proves that you want to get better. You’re so much more than you see, and I’m going to need you to be nicer to the girl I want.”

The last part she wanted to say was much harder for her to get out. She didn’t know how it would be received. Zoey bit her lip as she tried to shove her vulnerability down. “That’s enough for now, of course. I just — what if,” she started before looking down at her lap for a minute. After psyching herself up for a few seconds, she finally looked up again and finished what she started to say. “What if the part of you that still loves her is bigger than you think it is?”

Kassandra: 

It was almost comical for her to hear just how Zoey saw her. Saw her so differently than she saw herself. It was honestly hard for her to hear it, hell, to even let it sink in past the surface. All she could do was listen. Listen and look at Zoey with tear-filled eyes, nodding in some sort of agreement when Zoey told her to be nicer to herself. "I'll try," She offered gently, voice hoarse. "It'll just take some practice. I'm not really good at... Doing that." Her eyebrow raised as the blonde continued, moving onto another point that she honestly wasn't expecting to hear. Let alone think about. Fuck. So she decided to close her eyes and think. Her mind went blank, imagination running wild as she let everything go numb around her.

Two figures stood in front of her, both with their eyes closed. To the right stood Zoey and to the left stood Aurora. Aurora's frame twitched in her mind's eye, almost shifting back and forth between her sixteen year old self and the woman she'd met today. In her mind's eye she saw herself step forward, reaching a hand out for Aurora and felt a warmth before it turned cold to the point that she retracted her hand like she'd been burned. Then she turned to Zoey, hand reaching out as the warmth that she'd felt before was all-encompassing before she pressed it against the other woman's cheek. Green eyes fluttered open, blushing once she realized how she'd actually found herself cupping Zoey's cheek in reality.

Two figures stood in front of her, both with their eyes closed. To the right stood Zoey and to the left stood Aurora. Aurora's frame twitched in her mind's eye, almost shifting back and forth between her sixteen year old self and the woman she'd met today. In her mind's eye she saw herself step forward, reaching a hand out for Aurora and felt a warmth before it turned cold to the point that she retracted her hand like she'd been burned. Then she turned to Zoey, hand reaching out as the warmth that she'd felt before was all-encompassing before she pressed it against the other woman's cheek. Green eyes fluttered open, blushing once she realized how she'd actually found herself cupping Zoey's cheek in reality.

Zoey: 

“Whenever you need a little help, just come to me. My door is always open to you. I’d actually love to help you find an actual place, Kass,” she said honestly. “Moving in with me is too fast. I will not be a stereotypical female-female relationship and u-haul, Kassandra. And yes, I’ve been doing my research.” Labeling herself was not something she was comfortable doing. If she had to, she’d say she was queer since that still had a lot of freedom involved. Still, pigeonholing herself into anything just felt odd. Zoey had always been raised to be such a free spirit.

Hearing how Kassandra felt about Aurora stirred some odd feelings within Zoey that she was not used to. Positive emotions were typically what ran through her, but right then, she knew she felt jealousy. It was so strange. She learned into Kass’ touch and let out a breath she didn’t know she’d been holding. “If you think I am under any impression that this,” she said as she motioned between the two of them with a finger before continuing, “will be easy, then you are very mistaken.” That most likely didn’t sound ideal to most people or like a dream, but to Zoey it sounded real. It was why she gravitated towards it and felt so okay with it all despite how tumultuous it could become. “I don’t want a fairytale. Now, I can almost promise you that I’ll most likely get jealous throughout you and your ex sorting things out, but I’ll try not to. Just keep me in the loop even if you think I won’t want to hear it.” With that, she stood up from where she was sitting and moved to stand in between Kass’ legs. The woman was still taller than the blonde, but with her sitting on the table, it was much less of a difference than normal. Zoey wrapped her arms around Kass’ neck and pressed a kiss to her nose before kissing both of her cheeks. “By the way, in case I haven’t been abundantly clear, I like you too. A lot.”\

Kassandra: 

A snort escaped her at the mention of Zoey doing research before she sighed in agreement. "I know I should probably go looking for a place. If you're able to help me then I'm definitely down for it. But it has to have room for Nugget because I don't want him staying cooped up in one room all day." Rubbing the back of her neck, Kassandra shrugged before offering up further information on herself. "I got my mother's money when she died. For some reason she kept me in her will. Plus I have what my father gave me and what I made over the last decade." Kassandra didn't like talking about money. It made her uncomfortable but she knew that the world revolved around it. She just didn't think it mattered how little, or in her case how much, she had in her bank account. "Anyway... I'll be good to buy something. Or rent something. I honestly do not know how the land situation works around here."

Kassandra rose an eyebrow at Zoey mentioning that she might get jealous of her and Aurora. No one had ever been jealous of her before, it was an odd feeling. And to be honest, she was quite surprised that she found herself being honored by that thought? When the blonde moved between her legs, Kass couldn't help but gulp, eyes nearly going cross eyed as the other woman got closer and began peppering her face with kisses. The blush she had on her face intensified at that, unable to meet Zoey's eyes. "You're not supposed to be so cute. Its not fair." She murmured back, placing her hands on Zoey's hips to give them a soft squeeze.

Zoey:

The talk about money wasn’t even really something that Zoey paid full attention to outside of needing to know what listings she should weed out. How much someone made wasn’t something she really concerned herself about. The blonde was more than comfortable enough with her own income, and that wasn’t something she ever thought to look at when thinking of dating. Money came and went so easily in life. That wasn’t something to worry herself over. “You can do either. It all just depends on if you’d rather rent or buy. How long are you planning on sticking around?” Zoey was relieved that their current topic of conversation made that question fit in seamlessly, but she’d be lying if she said she was only interested in the answer because of real estate. 

Staying close to Kass, the blonde laughed lightly and shrugged her shoulders. “I’m only this cute with you.” While the artist was playful and kind to most people, she did have some boundaries she only crossed when in a relationship or dancing around one. She didn’t want the brunette thinking that she treated everyone the same way. That wasn’t a nice feeling. “What else do you want to do with me today? I think you said something about you needing a shower. Would me offering to join you be too torturous for you?” She attempted to keep her tone innocent, but the smile on her face definitely gave away how mischievous she was.

Kassandra:

Kassandra felt her chest tighten at the question that was presented to her. How long was she planning on staying? Originally she only planned on staying long enough to get close to people, get dirt, and report back to daddy dearest. Now? Now she didn't know what she was doing. All she knew was that the thought of leaving and saying goodbye to Zoey left a horrible taste in her mouth. "I don't know, honestly. But I don't really want to leave you any time soon." Kassandra answered far too honestly before realizing exactly what she'd just said. Oh fuck. "I-I mean... Leave here. That--yep. That's what I meant."

Blushing furiously, a hand rubbed the back of her neck as she now promptly avoided eye contact. "Anyway... Yes, I need a shower." The idea of Zoey showering with her made her jaw drop slightly, her eyebrow raising as a wicked grin spread across her face. Just like that she'd forgotten her earlier blunder, pulling the blonde closer towards her. "You in the shower with me? I promise I'll behave. Mostly. Can't promise I won't makeout with you though." Green eyes found blue as she leaned forward, pressing a quick kiss to Zoey's lips. Standing up from the table, the brunette grabbed onto Zoey's hand, tugging her towards the shower with a giggle. "How do you feel about being kissed against a shower wall...." She murmured before picking up Zoey and kicking shut the door to the bathroom behind them.

Zoey:

Zoey let herself be distracted from the first part of their conversation for a moment. However, she did squirrel the comment away in the back of her mind. It was something she wanted to touch on. However, she quickly found herself picked up and being walked towards her bathroom which put that thought on hold for a moment. “It would be a waste if we showered together, and I wasn’t pressed against a shower wall,” she said with a smile as she leaned forward and pressed a kiss to the brunette’s neck. It was just about the only spot she could reach from her position.

When they got to the bathroom, she wiggled out of Kass’ arms and quickly began shedding her shirt. “Just so you know, I don’t want you to leave me anytime soon either,” she said right before kissing Kass again.

Kassandra: 

A pout formed on her lips as soon as Zoey worked her way out of her arms but it quickly disappeared the absolute second that Zoey began taking off her shirt. Without skipping a beat, Kassandra reached for the shirt that Zoey had lent her, making sure to pull it off rather than tear it away given the fact that it wasn't her own shirt. She didn't think Zoey would be particularly too happy with that kind of destruction. Reaching around the blonde, she turned on the water to 'hot' before pulling back to look at the blonde. "Alright, gorgeous, you're taking too long." With a giggle, Kassandra picked up Zoey once more and brought her under the shower. Sure, they both still had the lower half of their clothes on but she didn't really care. Not with the water pouring down around them, not with how Zoey was looking at her. And as she leaned down to connect their lips once more, she pressed Zoey against the wall as steam began to fill the room. 

Showering together was the best idea.

#zoey ft. kassandra #discord 3 #cinnamon roll meets sinnamon roll

[goodwriterwithbadhabits]

Dirty Laundry

Master List

~~

“Vernon, what in the cinnamon toast fuck happened to our room?” Joshua asked the moment he entered the dorm room. His half of the room was still fairly clean, but Vernon's side was covered in dirty clothes and take out containers.

“Hey now, Holy Boy, I have been very busy, and I haven't had the chance to do laundry.” Vernon defended, squeezing past the older boy to shove his clothes closer to his laundry hamper. “And its gonna be too late to wash all this with finals coming up.”

“Gross, why don't you just use the laundry service Cheol and I use?” Josh asked, tossing his duffle bag on his bunk.

“Because I'm broke, next question.” 

“Dude, seriously, its not that bad. It's 20 for a load of laundry, 10 when she picks it up, 10 when she drops it off. If you don't pay her when she's trying to drop it off, she keeps it until you do.” Joshua explained, watching his younger friend attempt to clean his side of the room.

“She?”

“Yeah, Y/n, she's a freshman, like you, and an engineering major.”

“So doesn't she have finals coming up too?” Vernon asked, finally admitting defeat and flopping into his desk chair.

“Yeah, but she studies while she waits for laundry to get finished.” Josh shrugged. “Either way she'll be here tomorrow morning before my lecture to pick up some of my stuff, you should ask her about joining in.”

“Whatever. How was LA?” Vernon shifted the conversation.

“Same as always, Mom says she wants you to come visit soon. I think she thinks I made you up.”

“Valid point. I am a stereotypical college kid. Messy room, sweatpants to class, lives on ramen.”

“Which is a problem.” Josh reminded him to which Vernon shrugged.

“Not for me.”

“You're a monster, come on.” Josh stood and grabbed his coat. Vernon just stared at him.

“Where?”

“Food, I'll pay.”

“Alright.” Vernon shrugged. “Rule 6 of university, never say no to free food.”

~~

The following morning Vernon was jolted from his sleep by a knock on the door. Joshua, who was, unshockingly, already awake, bounded over to the door.

“Good morning.” He greeted, and Vernon could practically see the smile his friend wore.

“Morning Shua.”

“Come on in, excuse his mess.” Vernon sat up, leaning on the wall, and rubbed the sleep from his eyes. When he opened them fully, he wasn't expecting to see you. Seeing someone so breathtaking standing in his messy dorm made Vernon suddenly very embarrassed.

“Good morning, you must be Vernon.” You greeted, offering him a warm smile. “I'm Y/n.”

“A pleasure. Sorry about the mess.”

“I get it.” You shrugged.

“So here's the 10, and my laundry.” Shua interrupted. “Yeet, alright. See you in a bit then.” You waved to Vernon before picking up the hamper.

“Oh hey, you got any room on your roster for him?” Josh asked, pointing to Vernon, who waved again.

“Um,” You pulled out your phone, checking something. “I'm free Thursday evenings.” You looked back up at him. “I can do up to two loads at a time, you pay me 10 when I pick it up, 10 when I drop it off, don't pay, I keep your shit. And don't worry about underwear, I literally don't care about it.”

“Alright, what time Thursday?”

“Around 6?” Vernon nodded again.

“Yeah, yeah, sure that works.�� You smiled at him again, making his heart pound before leaving the room with Josh's stuff.

“What's with the blush, Captain Dumbass?” Josh teased.

“Shut up, Holy Boy.” Vernon deflected.

“Is it cause a pretty girl saw you in your boxers in your messy room?” Vernon's face got even warmer.

“I said shut up.” He whined, falling back onto his bed. “I'm never going to live this down am I?”

“Probably not no.”

~~

“Hey, Scoops.” Vernon greeted, plopping down next to him at the pizza joint.

“Hello, Captain Dumbass.” The older man greeted making Vernon let out a long groan.

“I hate Chan for that one.” He huffed, snatching one of the Mozzarella sticks of Seungcheol's plate.

“It suits you though, Joshua told me what happened with Y/n last week.” He teased.

“Oh no.” Vernon shuddered. “Don't even talk to me about that, I barely managed to look her in the eyes when she came for my laundry.”

“Sounds like a you problem.” Cheol laughed.

“Y/n, you're late!” The harsh voice made both boys look up from their food. They watched as you jogged into the place, tying your apron on.

“Sorry, my last delivery was super late, I had to run from my dorm all the way here.” You explained.

“She works here too?” Vernon asked, ducking his head.

“And at the music shop on 5th.” Cheol nodded.

“How come she works so many places?”

“Depends on who you ask.” Jun started, jumping over the back of the booth to plop down across from Vernon. “Some rumors say its to pay for a sick family member, others say it's because she has debts to pay off.”

“Do you know the real reason?” Vernon leaned forward, hoping to hear more.

“Nope, no one's actually asked her.” The older man shrugged.

“Lame.” Vernon sighed, stealing another one of Cheols mozzarella sticks.

“Buy your own damn food, kid.” Cheol griped, not moving his plate.

“I'm broke.”

“Must suck,” Minghao started, “Good thing I just bought a pie, huh?” He teased.

“All hail the rich kid.” Vernon joked. “What would we do without you?”

“Is that my wallet?” Jun asked, grabbing it from Hao. “It is. You thief.”

“Never said I bought it with my money.” Hao shrugged.  Vernon laughed with the others but his attention was soon stolen by you as you delivered a pizza to a nearby table. As you turned back, you locked eyes with Vernon, who felt his cheeks heat up. You waved at him before scurrying back to the kitchen.

“Oh, so he's got a crush on her.” Jun's voice jolted him back into the current conversation.

“What?”

“Look at the blush.” Hao teased and Vernon responded by pulling his hood up and pulling the strings tight.

“What blush. I don't have a face.” He shrugged, resting his chin on his hands. Someone's giggles a moment later made him loosen his hidey-hole. You were standing at the end of the table a pizza in your hand, showing off some rather impressive biceps.

“Sorry.” You apologized, “One extra large pepperoni for Minghao?” The boys quickly cleared their things off the table, mouths watering at the sight of the still bubbling food.

“Oh hey, Y/n, I've been meaning to ask.” Cheol began, “How come you work so many places?”

“Oh, I'm just trying to save up to go on holiday this summer.” You explained with a smile. “I want to go to New York.”

“Oh Hansol knows a few things about New York.” Jun piped in, and Vernon was tempted to close his hood again.

“Hansol?” You looked very cute tilting your head in confusion. “I thought your name was Vernon?”

“Its actually Hansol, but everyone calls me Vernon.” He confessed, trying to keep his blush hidden in his hoodie.

“We all call him Captain-” Vernon lunged across the table, slapping his hand over Jun's mouth.

“Say it out loud, and I'll end you!” He threatened the older man.

“No worries, maybe you can tell me on Thursday.” You winked at him and scampered away.

“Did she just flirt with me? Was I just flirted at?” Vernon asked, dropping his chin onto the table.

“Yes, and yes, you did terribly, have some pizza.” Minghao dangled the slice in front of the younger boy who accepted it with a pout.

“I didn't do that bad, did I?” He asked, looking up at Cheol who sighed and patted his back.

“I have seen worse, eat your pizza.” Vernon let out a whine, shoving most of his pizza in his mouth.

“Oh hey, Hansol.” Son of a bitch. He looked up, finding you standing at the end of the table again. You looked at the other boys a blush creeping on your cheeks that Vernon found incredibly endearing.

“Ohh, hey Jeonghan!” Cheol greeted into his phone, “Yeah I can talk. Excuse me.” He slunk past you, moving to head outside. Vernon was pretty sure his phone wasn't even on. Your gaze moved to Jun and Hao, making the younger one grab the older and pull him out of the booth mumbling something about an important something happening this way.

And so Vernon was left alone with you. Fuck.

“So uh,” Vernon swallowed hard. “What's up?”

“I, um,” You blew out a breath, turning slightly. Vernon followed your gaze, finding Joshua, DK, and Seungkwan at another table cheering you on, but they immediately returned their gaze to their pizza.

“Oh.” Vernon blushed, “Um.”

“Boy are we great at talking.” You mumbled, a chuckle erupting from both of you.

“I was just gonna say,” He mused, dropping his slice back onto the tray.

“Awe man, I was so confident when I walked over here.” You whined a little, shoulders slumping.

“Hey, just, say what you wanted to say.” Vernon shrugged, trying to be chill. “I won't-”

“Do you wanna go out on a date sometime?” You blurted, slapping a hand over your mouth the moment the sentence came out. You both just stared at each other, both too dumbstruck to say anything.

“Oh my god, say something,” DK whined, face peeking up from behind the booth next to them.

“Um, sure?” Vernon stuttered out his answer, wanting to tie his hoodie back up and avoid the shame.

“Um, great. I'll text you.” You offered him a tight smile and a curt nod before once again, running away.

“That was bad wasn't it?” Vernon asked, looking to DK who grimaced. “I'm never gonna get the girl.”

“Probably. You ever think about not speaking ever again?” The older boy asked.

“Often”

~~

“I'm fucked.” Vernon sighed on Tuesday, as he fell onto his floor. “I'm fucked, I'm going to die alone.”

“Date went shit?”

“Date went shit. I want to literally kill myself, get resurrected, and then do it again.”

“That's really edgy kid.” Joshua turned in his desk chair to find his roommate face down on the floor. “What happened?”

“I took her out for breakfast like we agreed, and then we didn't talk at all.” Vernon huffed. “Neither of us could even say anything.”

“Its like the world's most awkward people went out.” Josh groaned. “Did she smile at all?”

“I mean, I walked her to her dorm and I made a joke about telepathic communication and she giggled.”

“Oh? A giggle? That's something.” Josh tried to see the bright side. Vernon sat up slightly.

“Yeah, she had this really cute smile after that.” Josh pursed his lips at the faraway smile on Vernon's face.

“So, have you planned out another date yet?” Vernon shook his head.

“No, she got a call right as I was about to ask, then I panicked and walked away.” Josh's sigh was not at all a shock. “Yeah I know, I'm an idiot, its just.” Vernon sighed, rolling onto his back, “She's so goddamn pretty. I don't know how to talk to her, especially when she's looking at me with those eyes and smiling that gorgeous smile. I'm a wreck around her.” He glanced over at the older boy who let out a small snicker. “Don't mock me now, Josh, I'm asking for help.” He whined. “I don't want to make her think I'm not into her.”

“Alright, my small, fragile ego-ed, freshman friend.”

“Hey.” Vernon sat up, “You don't gotta be mean about- are you texting someone right now?”

“Seungkwan and DK are better than me at relationship advise, and Dino is her roommate so I'm asking for some theoretical help.”

“Your boyfriend, and my ex-boyfriend are better love experts than you?”

“I'd ask Jihoon but he scares me.” Vernon stared at his friend confused.

“Wait, tiny music major Jihoon?”

“He once tried to kill Mingyu with a guitar,”

“Okay, alright, continue whatever you were doing.”

~~

Vernon was, once again, nervous. Thursday had come too fast and the bouquet of flowers sitting on his desk seemed like too much and not enough all at once. With Joshua, and the others, help, he had formulated a simple plan: give her the flowers, tell her you really like her and want to try again and ask her to teach you how to do your laundry.

Then it was 6:30, then 7, and still no sign of you. Vernon let out a defeated sigh, exiting out of Instagram to check his messenger. Nothing from you.

To: Y/n

Hey, are you okay?

From: Y/n

This is Dino, Y/n's really sick today, all laundry's canceled.

To: Y/n

Oh, does she have medicine? Something to eat?

From: Y/n

Dude, I've got to go to class. If you're so worried about her, here's our dorm address

The flowers were abandoned as Vernon tossed on his shoes and bolted out of his room, not sure why he suddenly felt so worried. Yeah, he liked you, a lot, but he hated being near sick people. That fact did not stop him from texting his mother and getting money to buy you medicine and some soup from his favorite cafe. Arriving at your door, breathless, he caught Dino just as he was leaving.

“Dude, are you really-?” Dino questioned. “Man, Shua was right, you got it bad.” He joked, a smile taking over his face. “Look just promise you won't do anything weird?”

“Are you kidding me right now?” Vernon was shocked at the younger boy’s words.

“I don't think you will, but for her sake. Just don't be too loud and lock the door when you leave.” Dino shrugged. “I'll be back at like, midnight.”

“Thanks, man.”

“Yeah whatever, but if you try anything, I swear to the gods Vernon,” Vernon raised his hands in surrender, making Dino nod. Once the younger man had walked away Vernon made his way into the dorm. It was rather clean, which was shocking, seeing as Dino was an incredibly messy person. He found you asleep, bundled into a fluffy comforter, with a large stuffed penguin in your arms. When he set the bag of stuff on one of the desks in the room a little too loudly you grumbled, sitting up slightly.

“Channie? I thought you had class?” You asked, blinking sleep from your eyes. “Oh, Vernon, what are you doing here?” You tugged your blanket closer to your chest as you sat up to look at him.

“Hey, Dino texted me, he said you were sick so I bought you some medicine and some soup.” “Oh.” You sniffled, “Thank you.” It was quiet for a moment, the sounds of the campus at night leaking in through your cracked window. “Hey, Vernon, why'd you come over?”

“You were sick, I wanted to make sure you were okay?” He explained, scratching the back of his head in slight embarrassment.

“Why? Cause otherwise, you'd have no one to do your laundry?” You huffed, punctuating your sentence with another sniffle.

“What?” Vernon was legit confused. “No, cause I really like you. Wait.” You glanced up at him quickly before dropping your gaze back to your hands. “Have people really only gotten close to you because of that?” You nodded.

“A couple times. One of them thought sleeping with me could get him free laundry service. And then you,” You let out another huff. “I really like you and you agreed to go out with me, but then you wouldn't talk to me, I thought it was going to be like that again.”

“What? No! I just,” Vernon sighed, “I really like you and I'm awful at talking to people I have a thing for. Just ask Seungkwan. When I asked him out it took four months of lead up and I could barely talk to him.”

“Wait, you dated Seungkwannie?” You asked, then your eyes widened. “Oh! He's talked about you! He said you were really cute, but realized being together wasn't meant to be.” Vernon felt his heart drop at your words.

“Yeah.”

“Hey, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said anything.”

“No its okay.” Vernon waved you off, trying to clear his head. He really had thought he was in love with Seungkwan but after a few months, they realized that while being friends was awesome, being more than that felt strange. “Are you hungry? The soup's from Gyu, handmade.”

“That sounds amazing.” You practically moaned. Vernon helped you get comfortable before handing you the container of soup, which you ended up foregoing the spoon on and drinking it straight from. Vernon was pretty sure that was the hottest thing ever.

After, you both sat quietly for a moment, now with your TV playing quietly in the background.

“Hey, Y/n, I have a question.”

“Shoot.” Vernon set his phone down, watching as you did the same, fully looking at him. His cheeks immediately felt warm and he suddenly forgot what he wanted to say.

“Um, I, I totally lost it.” He finally caved, muttering the last few words. You let out a giggle, followed by a rough cough, making Vernon once again worried.

“Something, something about this.” You began, waving your hand between the two of you. “This doesn't feel bad, I think we had to get through that awkward bit before finding something that worked for us.”

“We've barely spoken.” He sighed. You shrugged, offering him a smile.

“But I'm having fun. I'm content.” Your words made Vernon's heart actually flutter and a smile he couldn't seem to get rid of plastered itself to his face.

“Then once you're better, will you go out with me? On a proper date where we don't just eat silently and hate ourselves for it?” You both burst out laughing at his words.

“Vernon, Hansol, I would kiss you right now, but I don't want you sick.” You finally decided.

“So is that a yes?” He asked, leaning slightly towards you, the excitement obvious on his face.

“Its a yes.”

(Boy is that ending bad. This isn’t part of the Christmas event. Sorry)

#Vernon imagines #Vernon imagine #hansol imagine #hansol imagines #hansol vernon chwe #seventeen imagines #seventeen imagine #seventeen hansol

[nat-roman0ff]

i. tuesday

a series of blurbs // a certain time and place

 i. tuesday

the one where they eat too much pizza, and swallow their feelings.

wc: 1,893

warnings: swearing, mentions of sex, bad writing, feasting.

------------------------

It’s quarter past seven when she finally gets to relax. It’s Tuesday, and Tuesdays at work always meant her boss screaming about something, pissy clients, and her snotty coworker making comments about whatever it goddamn was that she hated her for this week. The glimmer of Monday has worn off and it’s back to the same old, same old.

 Tuesdays weren’t always terrible, though. It’s warm and breezy today and the birds are chirping loud and high in the sky. There’s a distinct smell of summer in the air; it’s just on the cusp, as noted by the line of sweat collecting at her hairline as she tredges home. This Tuesday in particular, however, was exceptionally not terrible. Her sort of best friend, part time couch surfer (even though he had his own place), and sometimes lover, was home for a blip of time between his “rockstar” (even though he hated the word) lifestyle and normal life.

 Shawn’s an anomaly, she thinks. He’s a little bit of everything all mixed into one neurotic, passionate, sometimes self destructive mess of a boy. But whatever it is that he is to her, he’s a good one. That much she does know.

She’s practically limping by the time she reaches the front door of her apartment, cursing herself for deciding today was the day to break in new shoes. Her phone pings from her back pocket and it’s Shawn; be there in a few! He writes. She doesn’t bother to text back because if she doesn’t get these ever loving shoes off within the next five seconds, and a piece of pizza down her throat she might just burst.

 After changing from work clothes to something more comfortable, she settles on the couch with the box of pizza. She sighs a breath of relief when the first waft of pepperoni hits her nose, and grins sheepishly.

 “Honey, I’m home!” Shawn bursts through the door without so much as knocking.

 “Yo,” she deadpans, half a slice hanging out of her mouth.

 Shawn jumps over the back of the couch onto the empty cushion beside his girl, “how’s your Tuesday?”

 “Better, now that you’re here.”

 “Aw, shucks,” Shawn sighs, putting his head on her shoulder.

 She rolls her eyes, “I was talking to the pizza.”

 “In that case,” he plucks the remaining slice in her hand out and shoves it whole in his mouth, “delicious,” he mumbles through chews.

 “You’re an animal,” she mutters.

 “Only for you, baby,” he says, a string of mozzarella hanging on his chin.

 Her heart skips at the line. Baby; it quite literally means nothing in the context, but how she so fucking wished it meant more. She’s in love with him (of course). Believe it or not, the Shawn Mendes isn’t actually everyone’s cup of tea. Once you get past the great hair and sharp jawline and impossibly good smile he’s rather, well, weird. You can never really figure him out and she supposes that’s what brought the two of them together in the first place.

 When people ask how they met, neither of them can ever quite put their finger on it. She’d started seeing him at outings with friends of friends of friends. He was always there but never within reach. She knew who he was and what he did and it never really phased her, he was just always that dude she saw at the bar sometimes at whoever’s friend’s best friend’s boyfriend’s birthday party.

 It hadn’t been until a Halloween party about two years ago that left the two of them soberly stranded in a sea of plastered people in horribly unoriginal costumes. He was dressed as Julius Caesar (a giant homemade cardboard salad dressing bottle with a wreath crown on his head) and she was dressed as Cereal Killer. For all inquiring minds, yes it was just as dumb as it sounds.

 “Whatcha thinking about?” He interrupts, already finished with his second slice of pizza.

 “Nothing,” she says, shaking her head, “nothing except you better split this pizza with me evenly this time, Jackass.”

 Shawn scoffs, “I have been wasting away performing every night, I deserve at least two-thirds of this pizza.”

 He pays attention to the way she rolls her eyes at him. His chest warms; it’s such a simple, bratty, cynical act coming from her but somehow it’s theirs. He says something ridiculous and she just rolls those beautiful damn eyes and the outside world just ceases to exist for a tiny moment. Head over heels might be an understatement, and a cheesy one at that. He’s an entire goddamn mess for this girl.

 Shawn leans over and pecks a quick kiss on her cheek.

 “Ugh,” she groans, feigning disgust, “you got pizza grease on me.”

 He shrugs.

 “What was that for anyways?” She asks.

 Shawn shrugs again, “missed you, I guess. It’s been too long. Keep telling you that you need to come out on tour with me -”

 There’s a disconnect in his voice. He’s looking at her but not at her. His eyes scan every part of her face except her eyes. Shawn has issues feeling vulnerable. Which is rich coming from someone who performs in front of thousands of strangers nightly. But it’s different with her. He’s never been so terrified of a single person in his life, even after the time Eric Williams whooped his ass in the third grade.

 “Oh yes because I’m sure my boss would just love me taking off months at a time. And unpaid? What a dream! Let me send her my resignation email right now!” She quips sarcastically.

 The heat in Shawn’s chest cools a little as he settles back into reality. She’s here and you’re there and that’s the only way it’s ever going to be, he reminds himself.

 “But you hate your job!” He whines, “Just quit, we’ll find something for you to do on tour.”

 She groans, “and what am I supposed to do the rest of the time? Sit around and watch you get baked and play guitar?”

 “I can think of something,” Shawn raises an eyebrow and she knows what’s coming.

 In a swift move the pizza box is on the floor and he’s got her pinned underneath him, “Kiss me.”

 It’s barely a whisper and she knows how this ends every time. Every time they kiss or fool around or fuck or wake up in each other’s arms she hopes it’s different this time. That this time is the time he’ll feel that spark she feels every time he touches her skin.

 It’s a different feeling for him. It’s less of a spark and more of a flutter; a familiar nervousness in his belly that makes the unknown comforting, but the uncertainty of not knowing terrifying. Does that make sense? His head is such a chaotic string of everything and nothing at the same time with her and he doesn’t know what is up or down when he’s around her, all that he knows is he’s safe. The nerocies stay at bay just long enough to maybe believe she loves him back.

 “Now why would you go around wanting something like that?” She replies, cupping his cheek, running her thumb over the divet where a tiny scar etches into his skin.

 I want you, he thinks.

 “Horny, been a while,” he fumbles. It’s the same way out every time. Say something stupid but sarcastically enough that she knows you’re joking. It saves from having to admit to anything while simultaneously hinting that he wants to spend the whole night soaking her in.

 She rolls her eyes and Shawn’s chest starts to tingle, “you’re disgusting,” she grumbles, pushing on his chest, “and I have a pizza to finish.”

 “While I have total faith that you can finish that whole pizza yourself, do you remember what happened the last time you did that?” He tuts, sitting back up and letting her curl back into a ball on the other end of the couch.

 She shoves half the slice in her mouth, “you know, I was really thinking of adding additional assault to my insides by washing this down with a milkshake. You down?”

 He props his chin on his fist and tilts his head to the side, “I love when you talk bowel movements with me.”

 She boops the tip of his nose as the first drop of rain pangs against the living room window. There’s a rush of wind and then out of nowhere the sky just opens and it’s coming down in sheets onto the streets below them. The wind brings in a cool lick of humidity into the air. Shawn lets out a dramatic sigh and sprawls himself across her legs, resting his head in her lap.

 “Looks like I’m staying here tonight. I’ll probably need to borrow one of your shirts to sleep in,” he jokes, stroking her side, his fingertips grazing the hem of her tee shirt.

 “Just don’t stretch it out in the tits.”

 Shawn laughs, his face scrunched, “you’re ridiculous.”

 He mindlessly kisses her bare thigh, not realizing just how far her pajama shorts have ridden up.

 “I’m ridiculous? You own your own condo yet I can’t seem to ever get you out of my apartment. Do you ever actually sleep there?”

 “Sometimes,” he mumbles between kisses, “just prefer it here I suppose.”

 She stops chewing for a second, “it’s a 400 square foot walk up. You live in a luxury building. The roof has a damn pool for crying out loud.”

 “Don’t forget the fire pits and dog washing station,” he reminds, and she can feel his lips smirking against her skin.

 She flicks his ear, “maybe you should start spending more time in your own place.”

 Shawn pauses, “like...not together?”

 “Of course, together but...I don’t know. What do you like about here so much that you can’t get there?”

 You, he thinks.

 “I dunno,” he looks around desperate for anything to stick out. His heart races and he can feel that familiar anxious itch starting to burn his skin when he’s on the verge of saying too much.

 “This wall,” he points to the far wall across the room behind her bed, “I like the color of that wall.  Everything in my place is all white. Need some liveliness and color and whatnot.”

  She doesn’t buy it, “well Shawn, I’m really excited to introduce you to something called a Hardware Store. You can buy all the paint colors you want.”

 Shawn perks his head up, “will you help me do that?” He asks, tracing words he’ll never say out loud into her skin with the tips of his fingers.

 She swears she’s writes ‘I love you’ three times into her skin before she responds, “of course.”

 He nods and rests his head back onto her lap. Shawn’s eyes close when she threads her fingers through his hair. This is home, he thinks.

 She screams ‘I love you’ three times in her head so loudly it almost threatens to bubble out between her lips. It’s a loud thought, and she wonders if she shouts it loud enough through her head if maybe one day he’ll listen.

 She thinks someday, someday with a few hundred maybes thrown in she’ll be brave enough to say it out loud. But that day isn’t Tuesday.

------------------------

hiiii hi hello! this is my first time writing shawn, i have about 8 years worth of terrible one direction fanfiction behind me so i thought why not start something new!

please let me know what you think! i’ve started it as sort of a blurb series with more to come, you can check all the upcoming titles on my masterlist! (linked on the sidebar).

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes fanfic #shawn mendes fanfiction #shawn mendes smut #shawn mendes blurb #actap

[thisislizheather]

July Jiffs 2020

This was me all month.

The key word being was. We bought an air conditioner! We’ve been an A/C-free family for some time now, but since we’re spending so much time at home, we figured now was the time to be cool. In other news, everything still blows! What a shock! Here’s how I spent July.

I didn’t even know another Halloween movie was being made but of course I’ll go see it even if it turns out to be trash, you gotta support classic horror franchises, that’s just basic horror etiquette 101.

This is the most basic, boring-sounding sandwich on planet earth, but it tastes incredible I promise you (I didn’t add bacon, but I did add fresh mozzarella) and whatever bread you use, it’ll still be great. I find myself constantly forgetting about the greatness of mayo because I, my dear, am an idiot.

I ordered a bunch of new address labels on Zazzle because they were having a Christmas in July sale, so I bought some seasonally inspired labels to use over the next few months. If you’re not seasonally co-ordinating your return address labels, are you even living?

I’m still doing Nathan’s podcast on Patreon incase you’re interested. (You can find more clips on his Instagram.)

I attempted to watch the new Baby-Sitter’s Club on Netflix and it’s really not meant for me. I was never into the books or the movie or any of it, I never liked the idea of kids caring about making money, it seemed too sad to me. “Just be a kid!” I’d always thought.

Speaking of childhood nostalgia, I have started to watch reruns online of Sweet Valley High, which I loved as a kid. It’s no Breaker High, but it’s still pretty great to rewatch. God, Jessica really was an absolute bitch.

Some other things that I’ve rewatched: Con Air (practically a perfect movie, will always love, *Nic Cage forever* might be the only tattoo I’d ever get), Supermarket Sweep is on American Netflix and I was so excited (for about three episodes) then I moved on with my life, Sleepless in Seattle (still a very nice, average, reliable movie), Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure (actually a really great summer movie, will always be a fun time to watch, will forever be a huge Keanu fan, I just feel like I could trust him??), and Dick Tracy (will always love this movie even if it has eight million too many montages, the set design is gorgeous, and this one outfit that Madonna wears makes me question… everything).

Some new movies that I’ve watched: Always Be My Maybe (so, so great! How did it take me so long to see this! So many good scenes, such a good movie), The Karate Kid (insane that I hadn’t seen it before, kids were uncomfortably mean in the 80s, favourite part was when Mr. Miyagi beats up the children, great movie), The Stepfather (pretty fun time, so happy we’ve starting watching horror movies again), Eat Pray Love (ugh, I don’t know, I do love movies about women just leaving and doing fun shit alone and abandoning their lives, but this was pretty lame, I hated James Franco’s character more than life and truly didn’t understand how Julia Roberts was even briefly into him), and finally the original The Hills Have Eyes (which I loved weirdly enough despite being incredibly tense the entire movie, I just thought it was so well done and scary and incredible, the rape scene is of course awful and I shut my eyes for that part, but that was the only thing I hated, it doesn’t make sense that I liked this movie so much).

I don’t know how to word this, but something is off with the reasonably priced (and almost too cheap) parmesan sold at Trader Joe’s. It melts weird. It doesn’t taste like normal cheese. Something is afoot and I won’t buy it any longer. I’m truly dreading and equally anticipating the day that all of Trader Joe’s secrets are exposed. Be warned.

That being said, obviously I’m in love with the seasonal summer candles that TJ just released. We have a complicated relationship.

I made this gruyere mac and cheese with caramelized onions (I used almond milk and it still came out good) and can every recipe just include caramelized onions? The world is ending, let’s just put sweet, tiny, brown onions on everything and call it a day.

Ennio Morricone passed away last month and I find myself listening to the Cinema Paradiso soundtrack on repeat.

Read this great piece about summer blockbuster movies which also has just some great ideas for movies to rewatch right now.

I have to remember that Essie’s vibrant colours just f-ing suck. Only their muted/bland colours are good. They should really just stick to those. And if you’re looking for loud colours that stand out, the summer collection at Urban Outfitters is my go-to (and there’s always a 3 for $10 sale with them).

I listened to Taylor Swift’s new album and so far my favourites are definitely: the 1 and this is me trying.

Ugh, Astoriaaaaaa, DO BETTER.

I’ve been thinking about cancelling my Ipsy subscription again (because I think I don’t care about makeup at this current moment in time) and when I logged on to cancel, they let me choose one of the items being sent next month as if they knew I wanted to leave! So I chose a Sunday Riley product (because any sample I’ve tried from them, I’ve loved) so maybe I’ll cancel next month?

I tried a sample of Drunk Elephant’s shampoo & conditioner (which smelled so lovely) and my hair did seem softer the next day. There’s something about this brand though, I feel like they might be tricking us with their beautiful packaging and minimalist persona.

I bought and tried the ancient Biore Strips and I have absolutely no idea if they did what they’re supposed to do. Are you supposed to see the blackheads or whiteheads come off onto the strip? It felt like it just tried to peel my face off. No idea what’s going on with these.

I have been in love with the Peter Thomas Roth Correction Pads, I use one pad before bed each night and I think they’re doing something good because I always wake up with no new pimples. It has even started erasing all of the redness I’ve been experiencing lately from the summer heat and sweat and mask-wearing. At this point, I can definitely see myself rebuying when I run out, and if I do then I’ll definitely not get them from Sephora because you can get them way cheaper at other online retailers.

I’ve also started using this Dr. Dennis Gross All-In-One face cleanser and I think it’s a good one. It’s hard to tell because I started using it the same day at the correction pads I mentioned above (yes that was a bad idea but here we are), so maybe they’re working together to make my face good? We’ll revisit this. 

I finally opened up this Belif set I bought a few months ago and it’s really nothing special. I think the face cream is probably the best item in there because you truly don’t need to use a lot to feel moisturized. But the face cleanser? Meh. I don’t think it does very much, it definitely didn’t help any redness. And the toner? Don’t get me started on how I kind of think toner might be a scam. And the “eye moisturizer”? Seems superfluous. My eye area is plenty moist, thanks.

Perfect summer soap scent: Fresh Rainfall. If I can’t travel this year, I will escape into this scent. (Send help.)

Very excited to hear about Lindy West’s new book.

So I heard that Lady M now ships their cakes to Canada and I was able to scream in excitement for approx. four seconds before looking into it and seeing that it’ll cost you over $100 to get ONE cake sent. THE GALL, I tell you. THE GALL.

I briefly looked into the app Sweatcoin after hearing good things, but it really just seems like an app where its main goal is to track you. And yes, your phone already does that whether you’re aware or not, but I think I’ll pass on the extra tracking.

I heard that the upcoming Halloween Bob’s Burgers episode will “follow the kids as they try to deliver a burger to the hotel on their street.” It’s such a sad little bit of tiny information, but I love their seasonal episodes so much that I’ll take any crumbs available.

Actually helpful tips on how to clean your home efficiently.

Christ, why do I keep forgetting that Bareburger is absolutely nothing special? Why in the good fuck is it taking so long for a Shake Shack to come to Astoria?!

I ate on the patio at Hoja Santa in Astoria and the tacos were nothing to write home about. The service, drinks and chips were outstanding though, so I may have just ordered badly.

New favourite beer alert.

Best tweets of the month over here.

I tried Thai iced coffee and it was so wildly sweet and too aromatic, I probably wouldn’t get it again. And I also tried a Vietnamese iced coffee and it was the perfect level of sweet! What’s the difference between the two, you ask?

I finally tried the katsu sandwich at Hi-Collar as takeout in the East Village and it was absolutely nothing special. No idea why people are so into it.

I haven’t been to Bite in so many months, so it was nice to get takeout earlier this week. God how I’ve missed their ciabatta bread. They use it on their sandwiches and it comes from Balthazar each morning and it’s always heavenly.

I have found the perfect, light summer blanket and I’m trying not to focus on the fact that it came from Amazon.

I tried a grapefruit shandy and holy shit, it might be my favourite new summer drink. 

I ate on the patio at L’Artusi since it just reopened and good god, that carbonara will change you. So psyched to see they have the wagyu steak tartare on the menu now, too. The burger, the panzanella salad and the charred corn were all great, but that carbonara was the standout.

Some things I’d like to do this month: I’d love to try this tomato toast with blue cheese mayo, I’m going to start using a new clothes steamer I just bought with the hopes of getting rid of my iron & ironing board, I rebought a tube of Revitalash because of how great my lashes were looking when I used it a few years ago so I’ll start using it on August 1st and track my progress to prove how great this product is, I can’t wait for Moesha to be coming to Netflix this month, and I am waiting waiting waiting until I can find time to return to Lilia (on the patio) to eat this incredible tomato focaccia & garlic butter (shown below).

If you’ve got any interest in reading last month’s roundup, you can see what went down in June over here.

#monthly post #this is liz heather #Liz Heather #July 2020

[swiggity-swexual-i-am-asexual]

I'm beginning to think I might have celiac. Do you have any tips?

Well, first of all, go to your doctor with your concerns. Yes, even if it’s the USA, because celiac is a... kinda complex illness at times?? And will need a doctor’s verification, which you can only get while still on a gluten diet. You’ll get a blood test (and there’s also a panel thing you can do, because false negatives are a thing, but the names of all of them get me confused, so I suggest googling them for the names in case the doctor doesn’t know), and if it’s a positive test, they’ll want you to get an endoscopy (a super simple procedure where they put a tube with a camera down your throat to check your upper intenstine—it literally took me maybe a couple hours from check in to check out).

But like, most importantly??

Don’t freak out. If it’s celiacs, it’s gonna be fine. If it’s not, it’s still gonna be fine.

It may seem that you’re by yourself until you find more people with celiac, but there’s so many of us!! So even if you don’t interact much with the community, maybe follow the tags (if only to see everyone groaning and moaning about labeling... I am one of those people, haha).

But as for quick tips and tricks for the (potential) celiac

-first of all, until diagnosed, you have to stay on a gluten diet. So, I mean. Not to sound like a doomsday preper but if any time is the time to just eat every damn thing you’ve ever loved that has gluten in it, now is the time to eat it. (I personally gained like 5 pounds in two months I waited for the diagnosis tests to be done, I regret nothing. And if weight is a concern... well, first of all that’s about to get weird because celiac is weird, but I also _lost_ that weight quickly after.)

-Always know what gluten is. And don’t be afraid of that word. Just because everyone else doesn’t have to be concerned about a certain protein in wheat, barley, and rye (also watch out for oats, they are not your friend), doesn’t mean they get to be mean about it. This is literally your health—if there’s anytime you can snipe at someone, it’s regarding that.

-start looking at the things you already eat to see if they have gluten free (gf) labels. Gushers, for example-gluten free!!

-start saving for new cookwear. Yes, you’ll probably need new ones. Do NOT cross contaminate them, aka, use your new gf cooking supplies to make something with gluten. ESPECIALLY IF ITS WOODEN.

-people will forget, constantly. Be firm but polite until it’s ridiculous and it’s obvious they aren’t making an effort to learn. Then you may destroy them.

-also get a gf cook book.

-and check all the stores near you for different gf sections. I used to just do my groceries at a Walmart, now I also (and in fact usually/have mostly switched to) Kroger’s and Food Lion. If you have those stores, I suggest either. They’re usually (usually) good with labels.

-food is now even more expensive, but apparently if you track _your_ food costs versus _non gf foods_, you can get a tax break by claiming the extra cost is essentially your medicine. Don’t... quote me on that I know fuck all about taxes.

-most gf frozen pizzas suck. You’re gonna try them anyways but let me just go ahead and tell you. Freschetta is the best, I will fight someone on this, and Kroger brand is actually pretty good (add on garlic, oregano, parsley, and basil along with extra cheese for Even Better Pizza, to every pizza ever). Sadly, say goodbye to rising crust.

-you will have cravings for the most random things. Including foods you DONT LIKE. Because you can’t have them. But gradually your palette will expand for your new... selective diet.

-you will both hate gf fad people and love them. Mostly hate though.

-people ARE looking for a cure, but be patient, it may be a while. But it’s good to be hopeful—just be realistic about how it might not be up to how you want it.

-no, there is no pill you can take. Surprisingly, this will irritate the people around you more than it will you.

-if you can’t cook—yeah maybe learn. If you don’t make, say, mozzarella sticks using gf panko and rice flour, no one will. No, seriously. No one. (Unless you live in a gf haven, in which case—share your location I just waNNA KNOW-)

-you will be fine. In fact, you’ll feel better!!

-rice is your friend. Just go ahead and get a rice cooker.

-if it’s not labeled gf, you’re at your own risk.

-even if it is tbh because labeling laws are Awful.

-did I mention labeling annoyances because—

-people will call it a gluten allergy. It is not a gluten allergy. You will still need to list it under allergies in every paperwork thing you do for the rest of forever. Including the DOCTOR’S OFFICE.

-you may loose weight. You may gain weight. You might do both. So long as it’s not a severe or dramatic drop/gain, do not be too alarmed

-you will find random things about your body that you didn’t know was off due to celiac that will suddenly present itself. For example, my _feet shrunk half a size_ because of water retention.

-your search history will be weird.

-vitamins. If nothing else, vitamin b12 just TRUST ME ON THIS.

-find restaurants near you with gf things. Ask hard questions. Don’t be afraid to err on the side of caution and not eat there.

-some celiacs report having a higher sense of smell. This is... a thing.

-you will, at some point, go through the bread aisle and feel kinda disgusted, maybe nauseous. Surprise, airborne flour.

-love how your body is getting better and healing, even when it’s... really weird about it.

-pack your own food. Constantly.

-gf soy sauce. It is also your new friend.

-no but seriously, rice rice RICE. I didn’t even like rice until a year before diagnosis but liKE.

-everyone will have questions every time you tell someone. You do not have to be their personal search engine on this illness. We have smartphones. We have public libraries with computer internet access. You are not responsible for the education of someone else regarding your body.

-... people will ask what DO you eat. You can be honest, or you can just say you eat nosey people. People forget that that’s not... a normal question, for the most part, and that it’s actually not their business. (That said, people will ask kindly sometimes!! Or they’re trying to make sure they don’t gluten you by accident—and yes, gluten as a verb, this is more of an experience than something explainable. So don’t be mean just to be mean—but you also don’t HAVE to deal with Quincy Question getting up in your business.)

-people will say they could NEVER do it. They would. I did. You mighty have to. _They Would._ it sounds like a compliment at first. It quickly stops being one.

Essentially.... there’s a million and one inconveniences, I’m not gonna lie. But do NOT go back on yourself, no matter what food you miss, it is not worth it.

Most importantly though—breathe. Celiacs sucks but I’m honestly glad to found out. I mean I’d drop it in a heartbeat if there was like, a cure or a medication, but I was very sick—didn’t even know how much until later—it’s much better that I know. And if it is celiac, you’ll begin to feel better soon.

Also im not kidding, go join some gf and celiac tags and communities. It makes all the little annoyances better.

And celebrate the little things!! Gf cake is a THING THAT EXISTS.

#im... not sure if this. helped or not #but i hope it did!!! #best of luck friend #celiac #celiac disease #ask me anything #blessed be ❤️❤️

[swiftful-thinking13]

What do you mean by New Romantics is your life?

This sounds super cliché but 1989 was my saving grace during an awful chapter of my life. I remember listening to New Romantics for the first time and it was like opening the gates to a new universe created by Taylor in which I could happily exist and feel wholly understood. If I were a song, I would be New Romantics. The aesthetic, the production, the sarcastic tone, the message, how the chorus feels like an eruption of freedom…it feels like a wave of catharsis coming over me. The lyrics are my life:

life as a college student: “every day is like a battle” i.e. school/internships/work/having existential crises in the middle of class/not knowing what the fuck I’m doing with my life/etc

 “but every night with us is like a dream” i.e. partying with my friends on Thirsty Thursdays/interacting on Tumblr with all of you/adventuring around the beach late at night with my friends/ordering pizza and staying up late watching movies/having deep late-night talks with my roommates/stumbling out of clubs and craving mozzarella sticks/making out with cute boys whose names I don’t remember/late-night bike rides on the strand/etc

acting like you don’t have your shit together when it turns out that you’re just being melodramatic: “we play dumb, we know exactly what we’re doing”

 accepting yourself as a mess/self-awareness/the self-deprecating tone i.e. “we show off our different scarlet letters, trust me mine is better” and “the rumors are terrible and cruel but honey most of them are true.” 

All those overwhelming days that feel like life is crushing you: “we cry tears of mascara in the bathroom/honey, life is just a classroom.” (I’ve done this multiple times *cough cough* shoutout to winter quarter 2019)

All the shit I have lived through: “cause baby I could build a castle out of all the bricks they threw at me.” 

Taylor and I possess identical flirting styles: “It’s poker, he can’t see it in my face but I’m about to play my ace.” 

Me at my peak sagittarius: “we need love but all we want is danger.” 

For me, “heartbreak is the national anthem” because it’s all I’ve known thus far

I just adore this song. It feels like driving down PCH during sunset with your best friends. It feels like drinking champagne out of coffee mugs. New Romantics encapsulates my early 20′s and everything I feel at this very moment. I feel like I’m a new romantic. 

#new romantics #ask

[maximumkillshot]

The Situation

Warnings: Gender Bent! Dean, Mentions of Menstrual Cycles, blood is described... ALSO FUNNY AS ALL HELL

Pairing: None

Characters: TFW

A/N: So, I got a prompt from @anathewierdo yesterday via ask and I found it so unique and hilarious that I had to write it all in one night... If you want a part 2 lemme know!!! Thank you so much for this prompt.... it was insanely fun!

The Prompt: 

TFW + crack + “How dare you. No. How dare you say that to me.” “Drama queen” “I was about to conquer the world. I was this close. Don’t you call me drama queen”+ gender bend ;) (If you’re up for it and if it doesn’t sound that bad) 

“All I Could Do” Masterlist- CLICK HERE

Overall Masterlist- Click Here

“When You Call” Masterlist- Click Here

“The Situation” Masterlist- Click Here

“SAMMY!!” I yelled as I looked in the mirror.

“Who is that?” I heard Cass ask Sam from outside, “Sounded like she was in Dean’s room.”

“I told him not to bring any girls to the bunker, let me take care of it.” Said Sam as I heard his footsteps coming to my room, it was then that I realized…. I didn’t go to bed with a t-shirt on.

As soon as I came to this realization I heard the door open and Sam say, “Oh sorry, uhm where’s the guy you came in with?” as he covered his eyes.

“Sammy it’s me… It’s Dean.” I said as I stood both horrified and yet, slightly aroused at my new body. I had wavy dark blonde hair that came down to the mid of my back and freckles that dotted my face, my face was downright gorgeous and I had a perfect rack and ass to match…

“Yeah right, very funny, ma’am could you please put a shirt on?” Sam asked.

“FOR THE LOVE OF GOD SAMMY IT’S ME, LOOK!” I said as I took his hand away from his eyes and pointed to the anti-possession tattoo on my chest.

Sammy stood there dumbfounded as he stared at the tattoo… almost a little too long… “Alright alright, that’s enough looking,” I said as I covered my chest. I grabbed one of the smallest shirts that I had and it fit like a dress… great.

“What the hell happened, Dean?” Sammy asked.

“Well ain’t that the million dollar question… shit I gotta pee so bad it hurts… how do they do that?! I don’t know what to do.” I asked Sammy.

“I don’t know…”

“Let me call Jody.”

As soon as I called Jody I realized she isn’t going to recognize my voice… as soon as Sammy went to leave I called him back in..

“She isn’t gonna recognize my voice… you gotta tell her it’s me.”

“Ughh fine.”

Then finally she picked up…

“Hey Dean!” I heard Jody say….

“Hey Jody,” I said begrudgingly.

“I’m sorry who is this?”

“It’s Dean, Jody. It’s me… I have a little situation here.” I said in my new high pitched voice.

“Hahaha yeah right, who is this? And how did you get Dean’s phone?”

I motioned to Sam and he said, “Hey Jody, it’s Sam…”

“Oh hey Sammy who’s your new friend.”

“No one new, it’s just Dean… He’s… a she right now.”

“HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA WHAT?! NO WAY SEND A PICTURE… CLAIRE IS GONNA LOVE THIS!” Jody started laughing uncontrollably.

“JODY, it’s not that funny” I huffed.

“Oh yeah, it is!” I heard her slapping her hand on her desk at the station, most likely.

“Jody listen, I need your help..”

“Okay.., what is it?”

“I uhh, I don’t know how to umm. I don’t know how to pee..”

“WWWWAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA YOU DON--- AAAHAHA” Jody seemed like she was losing it.

“Nevermind, I’ll figure it out myself.” I said dejectedly..

“I’m sorry, it’s just... It’s a funny picture...Thanks, Sam.”

“No problem Jody,” Said Sam as he put his phone away, trying not to laugh.

“Ok Dean, to go to the bathroom, you just sit on the toilet and let it go…” Said, Jody, as she was recovering…

After I waived Sam away to explain to Cass what had happened, I took my phone to the bathroom, with Jody still on the line, and sat on the toilet.

I took a deep breath…”Okay, okay, it’s gonna be fine Dean.” I said to myself as I relaxed.. But it hurt like, really badly when I peed and it smelled awful, almost metallic.

“Jody? Is it supposed to feel like knives are in my pelvis?” I asked hunched over… When I looked at my boxers there was, “Uhmmm Jody, I’m bleeding… What the fuck is happening?!” I asked panicked.

“Dean? Are you on your period honey?” Jody asked…

“I don’t know I haven’t exactly had one before Jody!” I yelled…

“Accept the video chat,” said Jody.

As soon as I accepted it I aimed it at the ruined boxers.

“Ohh yeah, okay Dean, you’re on your period sweetheart.” Said Jody as gently as she could.

“What do I do?” I asked.

After getting a laundry list of things that I needed to get I wiped myself (Which was incredibly weird to do to my front), then I gave Sammy the list while I hunched over the war table in agony….

Sam said, “Oh C’mon Dean it can’t be that bad, you're just being overdramatic.”

I looked shocked… “How dare you. No. How dare you say that to me.”

“Drama queen” Sam laughed back

“Excuse me?!” I said shocked  “I was about to conquer the world. I was this close. Don’t you call me a drama queen!” I spat at him… “Now look at me, I feel like I have a blender in my pelvis, my breasts hurt, and I simultaneously want chocolate pudding pie and want to puke… what happened to me? The only positive here is that I’m kinda hot.” I said as I choked, near tears.

Cass responded from the doorway, “perhaps it was the witch that you called, ‘a spineless weak little girl’ that we killed yesterday.”

Dean looked at Cass and said “Oh shit… alright Sam, get those things for me, please. Cass, call Rowena…

Sam said, “And what are you going to do?”

“Me? I’m making a triple-decker bacon cheeseburger and fries, a chocolate milkshake, and a shit ton of mozzarella sticks… then I’m eating myself into a food coma.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know Sam, WHY ARE  MY INTERNAL ORGANS SHEDDING?! NONE OF THIS MAKES SENSE YET HERE WE ARE!” I screamed as I stomped off into the kitchen.

Want a part 2? Tell me So!!

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#maxi's606 #spn crack #dean winchester #sam winchester #castiel #spn #spn rp #spn fanfic #spn fandom

[intothedanvers-e]

Young, Dumb, & Broke

Word Count: 1.3k

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Summary: You just graduated high school and were ready to embark on your last summer of being a dumb teen and going on adventures before having to face the realities of the adult world. One day you were driving to a lake to meet some of your friends when your car broke down in the middle of nowhere. With no service and no gas stations around you wandered a little down the street and found one house where you went to ask for help. You expected to find an old couple living in the middle of nowhere, but a nice young British guy (Tom) answered the door. Due to unforeseen circumstances you spend the rest of the afternoon and most of the night together, but when it’s time to leave he says he wants to see you again. You exchange numbers with the cute British guy and embark on a long, secretive summer fling. You both lie about what you do for a living and what you were both doing in the middle of nowhere, but the moments you too bonded were all genuine. Will he find out about your plans after summer? Will you find out what he actually does for a living? Will this fling extend past summer?

Authors Note: hello everyone! first of all i know i missed an update last week, im so sorry ive hit really bad writers block with this series which i know is dumb bc im only on chapter 5 but ive been trying to get out of that funk recently which is also why this chapter is a little short. i hope you all understand :) thank you again for all the support in this series! i never thought this many people would like it <3 if you want to check out any of my other writing here’s my masterlist! if you have any feedback or comments please dont hesitate to send them my way!! yes i will keep updating this series on tuesdays! i hope i can shake this bad patch of writers block soon bc i genuinely enjoy writing this series so just bear with me and pls pls pls dont hate me. ok i love yall <3

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4

Chapter 5

You endured through your 8 hour shift without saying much to any of your co-workers. You would usually jump at any opportunity to tell your best friend about what happened to you, but to be completely honest you were still hurt about what happened the night of the bonfire. She quickly caught on that you were giving her the silent treatment and asked the manager to move her position for the day. You weren’t going to lie, it fucking sucked feeling like your best friend didn’t give a shit about you. You knew you only had about half an hour left of work at the restaurant and luckily you got to clock out before the big afternoon wave. You didn’t want to admit it to yourself but you were really excited about being able to see Tom again. The two of you had made plans for just around sunset, which gave you enough time to get home and get yourself ready and go out with him in an actually decent cute outfit.

“Table 8 got customers,” your manager said to you, snapping you out of your daydream.

You nodded and walked over to table 8. At it were two beautifully stunning women. You handed them two menus and smiled.

“Hi I’m Y/N I’ll be your server this afternoon, can I get you guys started on anything? Drinks?”

The two women gave each other a sneaky smile.

“Um we’re waiting for three of our friends they’ll be here in like 30 to 45 minutes. Can we just order drinks and like a small appetizer and then fully order when they get here?”

“Yeah that’s fine. Unfortunately, I’m clocking out in about 30 minutes so if they don’t get here by then my co-worker Brenda will take their orders.”

They looked at each other slightly disappointed.

“Okay I’ll take a Sprite. You Z?”

“I’ll take a coke. What would you recommend for the appetizer? My friend here Laura is lactose intolerant so it can’t be the mozzarella sticks unfortunately.”

“Honestly I think we have really good garlic bread. It’s handmade and comes with this amazing homemade marinara sauce.”

“I trust you Y/N, we’ll have an order of that.”

You wrote it down on your order pad and smiled.

“I’ll bring those drinks right out to you.”

You got the drinks for them and took it to them. They were both smiling and giggling before you walked to their table but stopped as soon as you got there.

“Hey Y/N are you from around here?” the one her friend called Z asked you.

“Yeah I am. Not too far from here.”

“Do you know where we can get some really good Mexican food? Not that this restaurant isn’t amazing already but a girl needs her burrito fix sometimes.”

“Yes I do actually!” you said taking out your order notepad, “I can write the address for you guys. They have the best salsas there, no joke.”

You ripped the paper and handed it to them.

“Y/N you are a lifesaver. The best waitress we’ve encountered here so far.”

You wrote your name on the paper and smiled.

“I know the owner, if you mention me and order the deluxe salsa and chips she’ll give you the salsa she usually saves for her regular customers.”

“You’re a real one,” the girl named Laura said smiling at you.

You walked back over to the registers where you heard the cooks gossiping about some people.

“Yeah they’re part of the thing that shut down all of downtown!” the main cooks said.

“Wait who?” you said sticking your head in the window that connected the kitchen and the register.

“The girls on 8. They’re actresses.”

You made a surprised face. They seemed so nice and genuine. The cook slid you a plate with garlic breads and a bowl with marinara sauce. You grabbed it and took it back to the girls.

“Here you are girls. Unfortunately, I am clocking out for the afternoon so my co-worker Brenda will be helping you from here on out.”

“Aw man! We were hoping to introduce our new friend to our friends, but I guess they’re taking longer than expected. Well it was nice to meet you Y/N, we will definitely be back here to see you again.”

“I’ll be here all summer,” you said smiling at them.

They handed you a 50-dollar bill.

“From two former waitresses who know how much doing this sucks. You are one of the good ones.”

You smiled at them and put it in your pocket.

“Thank you ladies. I hope you’re enjoying my city and I look forward to seeing you both again.”

You walked to the backroom and clocked out. You were going to leave out of the front like you always do but you didn’t want to risk seeing your “best friend” so you left out the backdoor. You got into your car and drove home with a huge smile on your face.

A few hours later you were dressed and doing your makeup. You didn’t want to overdo it so you did some natural looking makeup. You finished by 5:30, an hour before you were supposed to go get Tom. You went downstairs to make yourself busy, but came face to face with your mom bringing her luggage inside.

“There you are,” she said locking the front door.

You froze on the last step of your stairs.

“Didn’t realize you were back.”

“Came home as soon as I heard the voicemail you left me.”

“But you didn’t think to call me or text me or maybe ask what happened?”

“I came home didn’t I?”

You sighed and started climbing up the stairs again.

“Well it was taken care of so you shouldn’t have.”

“What do you mean?”

You didn’t answer and went upstairs to grab your bag and a jacket. You came back down to your mom standing at the bottom of the stairs checking all her bank statements.

“What do you mean it’s taken care of, I don’t have a charge on the card?”

You grabbed the car keys off the table next to the front door.

“I took care of it, alone. Again. I’m going out, don’t wait up for me.”

Before she could say anything you walked out the door, and took off in your car.

You arrived at Tom’s house about 30 minutes earlier than you were supposed to be there. You were going to call him but then remembered this was a dead zone in terms of phone signal. You parked your car in his driveway and went to knock on the front door. You heard footsteps, and suddenly a shirtless Tom with a towel wrapped around his waist opened the door. You’d seen him shirtless before, I mean you guys were in the pool late at night, but this time it really caught you off guard. You looked up at the ceiling and apologized.

“Shit sorry, I just uhh left my house a little earlier so I got here earlier and I was gonna call you but um- “

“Yeah no service, that’s fine. I was just getting out of the shower. Come on in.”

You walked behind him, still refusing to look at him. You were trying to hide how flustered you felt.

“Are you ok?”

You sat on the couch and looked at your feet.

“Yeah why?”

“You just haven’t looked at me,” he said laughing.

“I, uh, didn’t know if you wanted me to so.”

“I don’t mind.”

You looked at him as he stood there with a cheeky grin on his face.

“Go get ready Holland!” you said throwing a couch pillow at him.

“I’m just saying if you feel inclined to end the date early, be my guest.”

You gave him a fake shocked expression.

“You’d have to be lucky enough to get at least 4 or 5 dates before that Holland,” you said winking at him playfully.

“Oh look forward to it baby,” he said before disappearing up the stairs.

What a flirty little shit.

Taglist: @hollandlovely @greenarrowhead @justanotherfangirl2015 @oh-dear-tommy @marvelnerdxinfinity @lafayettes-baguettes-1 @hollandhugs @tiredofallthetroubles @marvel-ing-at-it-all @built4broadway @lostandafraiddepressedgirl @isisqueenoffandoms @for-my-mind @hbmoore1986 @dafnouche @justapotatonow @bellagrayson-wayne @marvelousspidey @chemiste @maryylea

#tom holland #tom holland fluff #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland fic #tom holland x reader #tom holland cute #tom holland edit #tom holland fandom #tom holland hot #tom holland imagine #tom holland moodboard #tom holland mood board #tom holland reader #tom holland series #tom holland story #tom holland summer #tom holland writing #tom holland x y/n #tom holland x you #summer #summer vibes #summer moodboard #summer mood board #young dumb and broke #masterlist