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churchofthpl · 2 months

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an elaboration of sorts

(this one doesn't rhyme;

most of them don't, but

the one before the last one did

and that's the one that this one

is a sort of extension of)

i see them in everything,

and i could talk about it for hours.

my list of examples is endless.

some of them have cool stories;

some of them don't, but

they still have a place of utmost importance

in my heart.

here are ten of them.

one; she is that feeling i got when i listened to the safety dance by men without hats for the first time. i was twelve years old. i'd been a fan of the ramones for a while, i was getting into other bands in their scene, i knew punk rock, i knew what it was like to be heard by music. the safety dance was different; it was like my future self was being heard. a future self in which i was happier and i had more freedom than i did aged twelve and i felt free to love and be loved back.

two; he is the mural of a swan on the side of my dream college. when i went for an initial visit - the same visit that caused me to apply before even leaving the building - i arrived twenty minutes early to my show-around, so i was stood outside. in front of the main entrance is a huge painting of a swan. i remember sitting on one of the benches opposite it and just looking over every detail and admiring the effort that went into it. i am working my ass off to get my grades up so i can go to that college.

three; they are the first pair of earrings i ever got. i got my earlobes pierced at claire's when i was six years old. they were tiny studs with aqua-coloured gems on them. they lasted a little over a year before seven-year-old cecile took them out. they were really pretty. i still have them somewhere.

four; she is the rocky horror picture show poster on my wall. it's "camp", thank you very much, though my cat seems to be afraid of it.

five; he is the folder of drawings i did as a child. the last time i saw my dad, i was twelve years old, and the last gift he ever gave me was a folder of every piece of art i did as a child that he kept. my best friend at the time joked that i should burn them. i thought about it, very briefly - i kept them. i kept them until i moved out of the apartment. they got lost in the moving, as did a lot of things, because my apartment was cleared out entirely only a couple of weeks after my mom's passing, so there were a lot of things i wasn't in the headspace to remember to take. i never got around looked through the folder.

six; they are the storm that england got a couple of weeks ago. there were tornado warnings in towns only a couple of cities over from me, and though i didn't say anything because it felt silly, i was terrified. the winds were so loud i could hardly hear myself breathe, and the rain was flooding my garden. i stood in my porch and recorded it, deciding that joking about it would calm my nerves a little. (they were there when i sent these recordings to a group chat.)

seven; she is the pair of scissors that were used when i got my first masculine haircut. i was at a point where i didn't know if i was a transgender boy or a butch. it's funny to look back on, because between then and now, i have gone through 'phases' and experiments with my gender and presentation, i have identified as multiple things, and i am back here, now, yet again not sure if i am ftm or a butch.

eight; he is the first muji pen i ever bought. it was a lifechanger. i need to go out and buy some more soon - i wonder if ryman is open on a sunday? they're my favourite brand of pen to use. almost all of my poems that are in notebooks have been in muji pens. all of my handwritten essays have been in muji pens that had the labels ripped off by the invigilators (you know, just in case i printed the answers in japanese onto a pen label and stuck it on the pen).

nine; they are the copy of gloom that i stole from my old group counsellor's office back when i first got transferred to my current school. i only did it because i thought the box looked cool and i was a bit of a kleptomaniac. he never asked for it back. since then, i've taught myself to play, and gloom is my favourite card game of all time.

ten; she is - above all else, i suppose - the first thing i smile about every morning. no, seriously. that's not even me being sappy. i check my phone first thing every morning, and she's always the first notification i read.

#tumblr poetry #kind of?#genderqueer lesbianism

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cocochannel00 · 3 years

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The Azoff Family: A Case Study on one of the Music Industry’s Most Connected Families

(ft. a breakdown of the Grammy voting process and problems)

This is very long so I will try and split it up into categories for everyone (sorry I got carried away- I spent like 2 hours writing this) but enjoy!

*Disclaimer: I want to preface while the majority of this is based in research, some parts may be speculation. I don’t know the family personally so I can’t tell you what goes on behind closed doors but I can tell you how parts of the entertainment/music industry work. I’ve had 5 internships in the industry (one in marketing at one of the big record labels) and the rest of my work is publicity (what I enjoy) and events and a former advisor used to run in the same circles as Irving Azoff (and he spilled some tea last year) I’m not out here to diminish the hard work of any artists or their teams, I’m simply here to showcase parts of the industry that aren’t always shown.*

Please also see: Story Time: How Fan Pages Directly Impact Columbia Records Decisions and Harry Styles Image

IRVING AZOFF: NEVER STOP THE GRIND

Let’s begin with the great business man himself Mr. Irving Azoff Irving Azoff is the literal posture child for connections and power in the music industry (he was also inducted into the 2020 rock and roll hall of fame class which is like a huge fucking deal for a manager to be inducted so you know he's the real deal)

In conclusion, I love Irving Azoff and his drive.

Irving Azoff: Early Years Run Down:

He came up middle class (dad was a pharmacist, mom a bookkeeper) in Danville, Illinois

He dropped out of college to run a small Midwestern concert-booking empire and managed local acts in the era

Opportunity came knocking and he got the chance to manage the Eagles and the rest is history

He's one of the best negotiators and has negotiated business on behalf of stars like Stevie Nicks, the Eagles, and Jimmy Buffet

Azoff has been an incredible manager and his drive to always advocate for his clients while basically not giving two sh*ts about what people think of him has gotten him the incredible reputation he has today.

All of Irving Azoff’s Major Job Positions:

Former President MCA (major label)

Former CEO of Ticketmaster and executive chairman of Live Nation Entertainment, the behemoth formed from Ticketmaster’s merger with Live Nation.

In 2013 he and Cablevision Systems Corp. CEO and New York Knicks owner James Dolan formed a partnership, Azoff MSG Entertainment (Currently still CEO)

----> Azoff also ran the Forum in Inglewood under Azoff MSG Entertainment after MSG purchased it in 2012 (it was sold in 2020 to the owner of the Clippers) — why do you think Harry played the forum for the Fine Line show? Azoff connection

Azoff MSG Entertainment encompasses all of the other companies including Full Stop Management, Global Music Rights (performance-rights org), and the Oak View Group (arena developing company)

He also is the co-founder and manager of the lobbying group Music Artists Coalition, a group that helps lobby for artists-rights issues such as royalty rates, copyright issue and healthcare insurance (see he's not all bad)

Essentially what I'm getting at is this man knows anybody who's anybody. He's the man you want on your team to help promote your music, plan your tour, and get you on that Grammy nom list.

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JEFFREY AZOFF: THE CHILD OF NEPOTISM

So for those of you that don't know, Jeffery Azoff is Harry's current manager and the son of Irving Azoff (the third of four kids). He's currently a partner at Full Stop Management, the company owned by Irving and the one artists such as Harry, Haim, the Eagles, Kings of Leon, and Meghan Trainer are signed to.

Jeffrey graduated from the University of Colorado's Leeds School of Business and started working fresh out of college at his father's old Management company (Frontline Management) working under Maroon 5's manager Jordan Feldstein (the only way you get that kind of internship/job as a 21 year old fresh out of college is if your family or family friends gives it to you). He worked here for 5 years.

Direct Quote from Irving Azoff to Jeffrey (really tells you a lot): "Listen carefully, because I’m going to say this one time. You have a phone and you have my last name. If you can’t figure it out, you’re not my son."

After working for his father, Jeffrey moved on to the talent agency CAA (Creative Artist Agency) where he worked for roughly 3 and half years before joining his dad in forming Full Stop Management in 2016.

While he was at CAA, Irving moved over clients like Christina Aguilera and the Eagles to the talent agency to help with tour booking instead of doing it internally through LiveNation (he was CEO).

Even though I'm sure Jeff has had to work somewhat hard to get to where he is (or at least to mess up his dad's work as he doesn't seem like the type to take laziness well), the door into the industry and every job was basically handed to him on a silver platter.

Not to mention if you watch episodes of keeping up with the kardashians (like myself) you can actually see Jeff hanging out with kendall and the rest of the fam at their Palm Springs house (you know you're a nepotism kid if you have an in with the Kardashian crew). Invite me next time Jeffrey!!!

Think of the Azoff's as the mafia family of the music industry, you don't mess with the mafia

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THE GRAMMY AWARDS: STUDENT COUNCIL ELECTIONS ON STEROIDS

Ok so here's where we’re going to get into a bit more of the speculation/grey area. I don't need to tell you that award shows are corrupt (See the Golden Globes Emily in Paris scandal) and the Grammys are not an exception. Think of the Grammys as one big student council/government elections where despite the fact the teachers tell you six times to vote for the best candidate, you're still going to vote for your friends even if they aren't the best.

A simplified break-down of Grammy voting:

1) Recording Academy voting members (artists, producers, musicians- anyone involved first hand with the creation of music; All voting members must have been producers, performers or engineers on six or more tracks of a commercially released album (or 12 or more digital tracks) and record labels will submit nominations in various categories to the grammys (songs need to be released commercially between October 1 of the previous year and September 30th of this year). You can also become a voting member by either winning a grammy or being endorsed by a current voting member (hint hint)

2) Once received, the recording academy with have the academy of trustees and its reviewers organize them and approve any changes to the 30 categories/fields (aka they can add new categories or remove old ones; so no best ukulele album of the year -- this is where things get funky)

There's speculation that during this stage when these special groups of 8-10 people are organizing genres, there's an "unwritten rule" that you need to be careful what album you green light (especially for famous artists) if you don't want them to win) (Rob Kenner said this- he used to be on one of these committees). Famous people tend to get more votes from clueless or lay Academy members that don't know the specialized categories or don't care enough to listen to songs that aren't radio trending.

3) After the nominations occur, Voting members begin their first voting. Members can vote for the four general categories of record of the year, album of the year, song of the year and best new artist and a maximum of 15 categories, all within their areas of expertise. Now the interesting thing is that while these are the guidelines there is literally nothing stopping them from voting in whatever categories they want (i.g. a rapper voting in the opera category despite not listening to opera). Theses ballots are all tallied and the top 20 entries are determined in each category (funky moment #2)

In 12 of the 84 categories those top 20 go to the ballot and it's done; for the rest it’s not like that. 59 categories including the big four go to a "nomination review committees" (identities are protected so they can't get lobbied... sure) who take a look at the top 20 and narrow it down to 7 or 8. (these are the special committees the Weekend talked about when he was snubbed). They're supposed to choose the nominees "based solely on the artistic and technical merits of the eligible recordings" which lets be real if that was the case Watermelon Sugar (along with most of the others in the category) I don't think would have been nomimated as they are very generic pop (none of them are special... sorry to the WM lovers out there).

This committee is basically held to THE HONOR CODE SYSTEM... I mean tell me when the last time the honor code system worked in literally any scenario (literally wtf). Don't take my word for it though the former CEO of the Academy Deborah Dugan (a queen) filed a complaint against the Recording Academy basically claiming that the nomination review process was rigged (she was fired after 5 months on the job).

Quote from Deborah Dugan "Members of the board [of trustees] and the secret committees chose artists with whom they have personal or business relationships... It is not unusual for artists who have relationships with Board members and who ranked at the bottom of the initial 20-artist list to end up receiving nominations."

These review committees can also exploit there power by adding up to two nominees that don't appear on the top 20 list to the final voting ballot (except in the 4 big categories - which watermelon sugar that one wasn't nominated for)

They also have craft committees for like non performance stuff (like album notes, engineering and arranging) that don't even get voted on by the academy voting members

4) After all of that fucked up mess, the grammy's decided is ok, the ballots go back to the voting members for the final vote. Deloitte (an accounting firm) then counts all of them, seals them in envelopes, and delivers them to the Grammy award show.

** The Grammy's just announced this year they're removing the "secret committees" so let's see how things shift in the next couple of years**

So obviously I'm not saying this to discredit Harry's nomination or his win as Fine Line was in the US top 20 albums for the majority of 2020, however, we must acknowledge privilege. Harry has a big name to him and a huge following, and while all of that shouldn't be taken into account, it does. He also has the Azoffs, a very well connected family with friends in lots of places that would be able to put in a good word here and there to get support behind Harry. Harry won best pop solo performance for Watermelon Sugar in a category with Doja Cat, Justin Bieber, Billie Eilish, Taylor Swift, and Dua Lipa. Look at the names there, the songs (ya'll can try and remember them cause I'm too lazy to write it out) and tell me that those top names with all of the music produced didn't get there through some connections.

Do with all this information what you will and if you are interested in learning more about the entertainment industry on your own Endeavor (owners of WME, a big talent agency like CAA) is hosting a free online program called the Excellence Program to help guide the future generation of industry executives. The program is a-synchronous and starts on July 12th. Highly recommend giving it a go if you're interested!!!

Alright ya'll that's it. Feel free to message me with your thoughts!

Extra Sources if you'd like to read:

https://www.vice.com/en/article/pkdndn/how-grammys-voting-actually-works-and-where-the-alleged-corruption-lies

https://www.grammy.com/grammys/awards/voting-process

https://www.latimes.com/entertainment-arts/music/story/2020-11-05/irving-azoff-eagles-manager

https://celebrityaccess.com/caarchive/jeffrey-azoff-exits-caa-to-launch-new-management-company/

https://www.rollingstone.com/pro/features/grammy-awards-secret-committees-945532/

https://www.rollingstone.com/music/music-news/grammy-awards-eliminate-secret-committees-voting-changes-1163887/

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thejustmaiden · 3 years

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So out of nowhere I was tagged and quoted by a SR shipper for a blog of mine posted in August of last year. Talk about throwback but, hey, gotta appreciate that level of snooping. 😉

Back in the day I actually used to encourage discourse amongst Inuyasha fans- both shippers and antis alike- but I've since realized that it's a lost cause. But for you, @feministmetalgreymon , I'll grant this exception. Just 'cause it's been a while so why the hell not. haha

I want to assure you, however, that nothing you say will ever convince me that Sesshomaru and Rin are meant to be together romantically or that the story intended it so. Nor will you find any validation here. You can ship them for all I care, but please for all that is good and holy while I have your attention try- I mean really try- to understand why it is so many of us Inuyasha fans are so against this pairing in the first place (newsflash: it's not about ship wars), and why we believe a romance between the two of them is completely and utterly out of character.

For those of you interested in reading this, the blog of mine in question that the above shipper mentions in their counter-argument is here for reference. It's titled "Jaken = Rin's Dad?" I'm going to try and keep this short, but I'm also making no such promises. After all, I'm not exactly known for my brevity. haha Now let's get crackin'!

Like you, feministmetalgreymon, did for your recent blog here where you took screenshots of mine to address certain parts, I will be doing the same and dissecting yours accordingly.

[Snippet 1]

I worked with kids for many years as a teacher, and many people in my family have too or still do. Two of them happen to be just over 5 feet which is quite short for the average adult woman living here. I've also worked alongside many a women of short stature, and never did I hear any of them complaining of issues with their students having difficulty differentiating them from their own peers just because they were short as well. I'm sorry but that's just ridiculous. Kids are quite smart and pick up on a lot more than you seem to give them credit for. Height is not the only characteristic they look at to determine who's an adult and who's not, and it's foolish to suggest otherwise. So unless you're a babysitter who's still in their teens and/or who has very childlike features or behavior then I'm afraid what you're getting at is total hogwash. This is just another example of how you shippers offer nothing of real substance to your reasoning, it's only ever cherry-picking or strawmanning from you guys. Stop deflecting from the real issues please, because this certainly isn't one and only winds up being a complete waste of time for all parties involved.

[Snippet 2]

Okay, calm down now. I wasn't insinuating that relationships between parents and children can't change over time in terms of how they get along. Of course that's possible, as all families experience their fair share of estrangement and abuse. What I was speaking about was in reference to the overall dynamic between the two. Because a bad mother or father can still be viewed as a parental figure to their child even if say they're not in said child's life anymore. Since Sesshomaru and Rin share a healthy bond- and just a friendly reminder that in my blog I even said that he doesn't have to necessarily be labeled her father but that a romantic relationship later would still be inappropriate- I didn't deem it necessary to address what you brought up. Plus, it kinda, umm, misses the point?? Please, let's stay on topic. And it's not captured in the screenshot, but stop acting like there isn't a small part of them that idolizes their parents at some point during childhood. Just like you mention later on how it's normal for kids to have innocent crushes on adults that they eventually grow out of? Well, guess what, the same concept applies here. Kids eventually learn that their parents are far from perfect and make mistakes too. Rin is so damn young in the OG series though that we never even get to see her reach that maturity level.

[Snippet 3]

LOL! Alright, okay, so the "unbreakable bond" bit you're mentioning was actually me quoting you sessrinners. Did you not catch that? I literally spelled it out. *sigh* The whole point I was making is that shippers like yourself make hypocritical and contradictory statements all.the.goddamn.time. One moment you guys claim that Sesshomaru and Rin were essentially strangers and meant very little to each other, only to say in the same breath a few seconds later that they were destined to be together and their bond is like no other. I agree, their bond is special, but why must that mean they're going to fall in love?

That is the root of the matter here. Too many animes/mangas have romanticized this older adult man & young girl growing up falling in love trope that it's become way too normalized and widely accepted across the world- and yes, in some cultures more than others. Sadly, you lack the awareness to recognize how this all works. You know how we know that? When we see that you shippers are so desensitized to sexualized images of girls in the media that you share posts like this one below which *subtly* imply a future romance although one half of that pairing is still just a child in the pic and then try and pass it off as cute. That's like super fucking problematic and it scares me that you can't see that (or deny you do). 🤢

After all that's said and done, Sesshomaru leaving Rin in the village with Kaede is to me the strongest indicator more than pretty much anything else he's done for Rin that proves he is her adoptive father. It's so funny to me how you somehow see the exact opposite though. 🤔 What I think is happening is that you got yourself on some squeaky clean ass shipper goggles fresh out of your little echo chamber. Because I hate to tell you, but what you're fantasizing is what you want to see and not what's actually there on screen or was written into the story. I'm strictly talking about Inuyasha and the manga of course. [For the TL; DR version skip to the last paragraph.]

Parents looking after their kids is what parents are supposed to do. A good parent will do anything to keep their child safe and ensure they are cared for, so what he did for her by leaving her there was in her best interests clearly. Besides, as a babysitter, you more than most people should understand that parents aren't always able to be there for their kids so sometimes others gotta step in to help. Haven't you heard of the saying, "it takes a village to raise a child?" Which in Rin's case is literally true! 😂 Sometimes kids are even sent off to stay with grandparents and that's who raises them instead. Or maybe they have to temporarily live with an aunt or uncle because their single parent's job requires they work out of town 4-5 days of the week so they're hardly home. But that doesn't mean that the parents care or love their kids any less, and it's foolish to assume that Sesshomaru must have thought very little of Rin simply due to the fact that he made the decision to leave her in the village. Come on, y'all are acting like he abandoned her there!!

It's just given the circumstances Sesshomaru finally came to learn that Rin traveling with him was no longer safe. I also like to think it's because he wished for her to live a more normal life and to learn how to fully trust humans again. Plus, continuing to travel with him as young as she was would have proven dangerous and unwise. Now for you to know all this and still manage to turn his past actions towards her while she was just a child into a romantic gesture is what boggles my mind. Regardless of how you look at it, from my perspective or your own, Sesshomaru is in the wrong. Either he's a father figure who impregnates his daughter at the young age of approximately 14. OR he's this man she used to travel with who maybe isn't a father to her but who nonetheless basically rapes her since kids her age can't consent to sex with an adult. Idk about you but it sounds to me like nobody here wins with either scenario we're given. In other words, you should be just as mad as we are. If only one side didn't choose to forsake their morals they know we both have in common for the sake of a ship. Welp. 🤷‍♀️

I agree, incest is disgusting but that's not the only problem we have with this pairing. A romantic bond forming between Sesshomaru and Rin would also constitute as grooming.

You realize that over the years he visited her in the village that he brought her gifts too and essentially watched her grow up right before his very eyes, right? I mean, I know you do, but I really shouldn't have to explain further why pursuing a romantic/sexual relationship with each other is plain and simple wrong. And before you say it's not because he didn't have any malintent, please understand that considering their history and power dynamic up to then that yes this is still considered grooming even if Rin supposedly "wanted it" or "made the first move." Whether you consider him her father or not, as the adult who took on a role resembling that of a caretaker in her early life- a critical developmental time for a child- Sesshomaru is obligated to turn down any advances by Rin and most definitely should not initiate any himself. As the first close adult figure she's had in her life since her parents died, it's unfathomable to imagine how Sesshomaru could go through with taking advantage of this young girl who was under his care and supervision since they met. To think he could be capable of betraying that trust sickens me to the core.

This. Now THIS is how a parent/guardian or a similar adult caretaker (babysitter, teacher, etc.) talks to a child. And, in turn, this is how some young children talk to adults. You'd be insane and delusional to deny it! We see it in our everyday lives, do we not? From where else do you think our stories draw most of their inspiration? Yes, obviously these fictional universes have aspects of fantasy that don't exist in the real world, but so how then do you suppose we're able to relate to them? The reason for that being is because these stories are written by people for people, so naturally there are going to be real life aspects embedded throughout. Sure, a little escapism doesn't hurt as we don't need to take everything so seriously, but ultimately we all need to recognize that the messages in the stories we tell matter. Most stories possess a combination of both light and dark themes, but when it specifically comes to the latter we gotta be careful with how we tackle this in children's media since kids are far more impressionable.

So if at the center of a story we have two of the main protagonists whose mom is basically their same age and to top it off she knew their dad when she was just a girl and who just so happened to help raise her, wouldn't you say that's beyond fucked up or at the very least so fucking weird? Like why would we think it's even remotely okay for our children to watch this garbage?? Really think about it. Try and be objective for once and think about how it would sound explaining this storyline to an outsider who's never watched IY or HNY. Well, antis have tried this before many times and we always get the same reaction: Ewww!

Like I said earlier, if you wanna ship it then fine, but 1) please stop seeking our approval or trying to change our minds - your ship wish came true didn't it, so why do you need us to validate it? 2) even though it's not canon, respect that we don't support this sequel portraying pedophilia in a positive light. It's harmful af to not only allow but glorify the continuation of sexualized images of young girls everywhere. And I shouldn't have to say this, but just because this trope is popular as you say does not make it right. Lolicon themes in the media have been an issue forever and it needs to stop. Yes, even some people in Japan or "the East" would agree. Shocker!

We're pissed off and rightfully so because Yashahime's TV rating is 14, not to mention it airs at the prime time kids in Japan watch TV after getting home from school. That's Towa and Setsuna's age, true, but if Rin being the mom when she's like only a year older than them (please don't argue w/ me about the math- antis have so far been right every time with it) is straight-up disgusting and not something we should be supporting or endorsing. Rin's a whole ass child!! Please don't start with the "but times were different then so her having kids at 15 is acceptable" argument either, because we've already debunked that and every other single excuse you guys throw at us. Besides, how or why would you expect young viewers to know these historical "facts" anyway, especially if as you suggest fiction doesn't affect reality so what does it matter? Yet here we are, arguing over a fictional show in real life almost a year and a half into the "Sesshomaru fucks?" sequel being announced. My ass, your ass, hell all our asses fiction doesn't affect reality!

Look, I do apologize if the tone of this blog came off as snippy or condescending at times. I do not wish you any ill will, it's just I'm not really sure what you expected to get out of all this besides maybe getting on my nerves perhaps. haha A lot of you shippers have been desperately scrambling to interact with us, lurking in our tags, jumping onto our posts screaming canon and getting so defensive even though you sought us out first. We've been sticking to our tags, so how about you stay in your lane too. By the way since we're on the topic, have you seen Twitter or Reddit?! SR shippers there are the actual worst and many Inuyasha fans (not just antis) have complained of not feeling welcomed to engage in fandom spaces anymore. Shippers swarm them and scare them off simply because fans don't like your ship and refuse to accept it. It's pathetic, really. No one should ever be bullied or harassed just because they don't like something you might. We're all fans of Inuyasha, aren't we? So let's act like it. Yashahime on the other hand, you guys are welcome to that pungent heap of trash. Fans have a right to criticize it too, but if you like it then good for you, so keep on liking it and don't mind us.

I'm almost done, but real quick back to Jaken! Let's not forget about how the official Yashahime website- which came out after my blog, mind you- described Jaken. This translation isn't the best one available but it's the only version a fellow anti friend could track down. They do recall a better one done by a native Japanese speaker who was also an anti, and that member confirmed that Jaken is indeed called Rin's babysitter. So you see, I was right in my interpretation. In the original post I did compare Jaken to a brother, but after talking to others (some comments can be found under said post) I did acknowledge that he's more of a reluctant babysitter who's not related. And if he's not at least a brother to Rin, then he's definitely not her father.

At the end of the day, the creator Rumiko Takahashi has the final word. Which is guess what? Hogosha. 💖 Probably should've just started out with that and saved us all the trouble, huh? Good day/night to you.

Papamaru bids you adieu now. 🤞

#anti yashahime #anti sessrin #sesshomaru is rin's dad #papamaru #hogosha 💖#the sequel may not be canon but sunrise can still burn in hell

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letsdiscoverkitty · 2 years

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A Long Overdue Update

PART ONE OF ?? I started penning this weeks ago but completely forgot that it was sitting in my drafts...It's basically a summary of the past few years/since COVID hit and I went offline for a while.

To say that it has been a turbulent few years would be an understatement. I was trying to think about what to say or where to even start this post as I did do a bit of a disappearing act from the Tumblr world when my world caved in a bit around me....I want to try to keep this bit of the post as brief as possible (which is often impossible for me to do as you all well know) but in essence, before the pandemic hit and I had recently left an admission in the Autumn of 2019, we had a number of deaths in the family/close to family, I was labelled as a SEED patient by the ED team and then was left alone for a month in Feb 2020 whilst my parents flew to NZ (I was going to be joining them on this but I couldn't for medical reasons). The night they returned home our world turned upside down when my dad fell down the stairs in the early hours of the next morning and suffered catastrophic brain injuries, resulting in him spending a total of 3-4 months between the ICU, trauma ward and a neuro-rehab ward, with things being touch-and-go at times. He had a number of spinal fractures, facial fractures and 3 bleeds on his brain (extra dural, sub dural and sub-arachnoid if there are any neuro guys out there). This all happened as the world around us started to shut down due to the spread of COVID-19 and I distinctly remember the last time my mum and I were able to visit my dad on the trauma ward (one at a time) before they stopped all visitors; he was completely delirious and although having got through the worst (we were told he may not live numerous times) he had no idea who I (or my mum) were and was "on another planet" and detained for his own safety....thankfully he is doing better than anyone ever expected now but he will never be the same person he was and there are multiple ramifications that might not be obvious on the outside (he looks very well, actually, ironically, he is fitter and healthier than he was before the injury), mentally it's a different story (although he refuses to accept or acknowledge this/has no insight whatsoever) and it's been incredibly traumatic for both my mum and I (Andi too but not so much as they weren't around as much when it happened).

As Covid locked down the country, I was admitted back into hospital for what was initially 4 weeks (I was desperate to go home to support my mum) but which turned out to be an 8 month admission. I was discharged in December 2020 despite my consultant urging me to stay longer; there were numerous reasons for this - one being that I was finding the ward environment and the unit far more unhelpful than beneficial and think I had reached my max for that admission. Upon leaving I was told that I would never get better and had some frankly horrible things said to me by the nutritionist at the time (including that the best case scenario was that I would go home and only lose a bit of weight of the coming months....) back home and Christmas was all but cancelled as COVID spread across the UK. I had no support from the outpatient services due to my EDP disappeared off the face of the planet - we had a really good theoretically plan from my discharge CPA that she would catch up with me each week to make the transition smoother than in the past however these appointments never happened, she was uncontactable and the day before I left the ward I got a phone call from the service telling me that someone would phone me at the end of the week to make sure I was home and safe. That EDP who I was originally working with was never seen again and no longer works for the service/no one will talk about her so Im not sure what happened there...

Anyway, I eventually got access to a therapist but it took a few months and by that time I was already finding things hard (looking back the last few months of that admission I was slipping and lapsing but despite asking for more help I actually got LESS which was just...well we wont go into it). Months passed and I was just sort of floating and, looking back now, was very much still struggling with trauma elements/triggers/flashbacks. Positively though I had reapplied to University (for the millionth time) and had some unconditional places and an interview lined up for Cambridge....however, as some of you know, I had also applied for a degree apprenticeship with a global company on a bit of a whim when I was once told I would never amount to anything whilst in hospital and low and behold as I went through the extremely long and challenging process, I felt more things click into place and was, after more interviews and assessment centres offered one of 6 places on the course in the South! I was in shock (and still am) but in the end I decided to withdrew all my uni applications (in hindsight traditional University didn't quite seem to be the right 'fit' for me/my personality traits) and accepted the degree apprenticeship in business/professional management with the company to start in the autumn.

I was also very very very fortunate that I also got my little bundle of fluff, Luna, in the Spring and I honestly could not have asked for a better soul mate, she is honestly my everything - fluff and all.

After some time had passed I was offered, by the IP consultant I had been under for the previous 8 months admission, to go back for a short top up to help me get to a stronger place to take my place on the apprenticeship as I had been slowly relapsing and falling backwards/into old cycles. I eventually took up this up and spent 3ish months (I think) back in hospital...Tbh it was a horrible admission, the ward was a complete mess and whilst I was there both consultants who had been there for donkeys years left, I had no support and was just left to my own devices...(Im not putting blame on anyone and I know I moan a lot about services and admissions etc and don't want it to sound like I wasn't grateful for the support, god I was, and still am, however looking back I just wasn't in the right mindset for it as I wasn't really willing to give up the control/eating disorder/self destructing and self sabotage loops/cycles, which is hard for me to acknowledge and admit).

I unfortunately came up against a number of roadblocks in terms of starting my apprenticeship as I needed to be signed off by Occ Health but as I was in hospital they couldn't say I could start in September, yet the hospital were saying that they wouldn't discharge me without knowing that I had the apprenticeship starting without a delay....this led to yet another limbo land of me being in hospital but not being in hospital which was horrendous. Looking back, a trigger for me is probably uncertainty, which can lead to feeling unsafe and find it hard to trust others. I was eventually discharged from the community despite the work situation not being solved as we seemed to be stuck in a stalemate situation where something had to give. Due to all the paperwork etc I had to wait another month to start my apprenticeship, which was a real shame as others on the course had begun and I again had the feeling of "being behind" which fed directly into my perfectionism/people pleasing and was a reminder of how I felt when I went off to Bristol Uni all those years ago feeling behind because I hadn't studied A level Biology and had been out of education for years. The company was very supportive and in terms of our cohort we do rotations/placements in different teams, so I didn't have to deal with too many difficult situations/interactions with others on my course who had started before me.

#personal #update

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1ddotdhq · 4 years

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🖕Mon Sept 28 ‘20 👓

First things first: see ya Psycho! Music Week published an article confirming Syco’s “low-key” demise. Music Week tells us two interesting things - the first is that “artists from [Cowell’s] TV show will now be free to sign to any label, with Sony no longer enjoying first refusal”. The second interesting tidbit is that “all Syco Music employees and artists have now either been redeployed within Sony Music, or have left the company”. Happy days!

More like busy days - for Harry, at least! He was seen yesterday evening in LA, taking pictures with a fan. He was wearing a mask (sexy) and a mini hair clip (less sexy, but adorable nonetheless). We can take this as an indication that pre-production for Don’t Worry Darling is likely underway, and as he’s the lead male role (!!!!!!), he has RESPONSIBILITIES and so he had to be there before the day of the actual shoot. Your intern spent a few hours reading up on film set guidelines, so I’m going to tell you that at some point between the UK, Italy, the UK again, and LA, Harry got himself screened and tested negative for COVID, as is mandatory to do before entering a film set. These sets are closed, and any visitors must also undergo screenings, as far as I could tell. Anyways, hopefully that keeps him safe and busy for the next few months!

His Grammy campaign is ALSO underway, as his team told Music Week that they’ve “got a few more things up [their sleeve] for the rest of the year, but [we’ll] have to wait and see”. Is it the Golden video? I bet it’s the Golden video. Some more information about Harry’s accessories also became available to the public today: his custom vampire wife blue HS bag was VERY custom-made, apparently, as he specifically requested that color blue for his initials (the letters are normally done in a ~golden~ thread, which makes it funner, imo). In case you’re curious - it IS the same color as his Light’s Up costume, the Vespa, the room that Falling was shot in, and on and on and on. He does seem to rather have a fascination with that color, doesn’t he? Almost like...he gets so lost inside it? Can you believe it??

Hahaha okay moving on: Zayn ALSO keeps on keepin’ on to make Z3 a more tangible reality: he registered two new songs today: “Different” and “Look At Me Now”. And even #better (last time, I promise haha) - “Better” was featured on Amazon Music’s “song of the day”! I have to hear the songs before I say anything about it, but I do sort of hope that things will be “Different” this time around - “Better” - and that he’s telling us “Look At Me Now”. To use twitter terminology, I’m manifesting good things for him.

Liam had a feature in Esquire Mexico, where they talked about his early aspirations as an Olympic runner changing into his decision to give up running to focus on music. I wish they had talked about this a bit more, because I can’t expect that was an easy decision, but also, he would have been around 14 when he made it. That’s a BIG responsibility for a kid, and I want to hear how he felt about it then, and how he feels about it now, some thirteen years on. About his music career, he says: “The effort is what really counts. Having tried it was fundamental, but also understanding that if it didn’t work, it just wasn’t for me”. He does, however, attribute his success to his obsessive attitude (hmmm). At any rate, you’re a JOY to have around, Liam, so I’m glad it DID work out!

The feature also came with PICTURES, of course, in which he looks better than anyone reasonably has a right to - I have to keep reminding myself that if I want to stay impartial, I can’t be attracted to any of them, but DAMN did Liam test my resolve in these! They had him in glasses and a knitted hoodie/jumper/sweater thing holding a guitar on the cover photo. There are other pictures in which he’s wearing half undone button up shirts and too cool for school shades and looking moodily off into the distance (while holding his guitar) and a few where he’s looking pensively down in a blue paisley shirt and glasses (whew!). I think it’s the glasses that killed me, tbh, but go check them out, because I’m certainly not doing them justice!

In some sunny news, Free My Meal popped up again to thank Louis for raising awareness for their cause, calling him a legend (we been knew, but it’s nice to see!) and using hashtags like “#noshame” and “#justask”, and I have to say - sometimes, you would be surprised at how kind people can be if you ask. ALSO, I am bringing this charity up literally ANY TIME I have the opportunity to, because I think it is doing phenomenal work, and I wish there were more programs like this one.

I also have a little bit of a Clown Car update for you: yesterday, Nick Gordon posted a “#theysaidyes” picture, featuring both Briana and Freddie, and captioning with a quote from...wait for it...When Harry Met Sally!!! He then went on a comment reading spree, liking such comments as “Although you are not the real father, you will be the best father, believe me” and “*** **”. I...am actually speechless, which never happens to me. AND THEN! Briana followed and account called “thepropertybrokers” which is an “Investment Property Specialist” account in Beverly Hills. Are you...going somewhere, girl? Don’t be shy, *** **.

And, hmmm, let me think - what day is it? Oh, yeah, the 28th, I almost forgot! You know who DIDN'T? Paul Higgins, former One Direction bodyguard and bona fide Tour Dad, who went around Instagram liking “Happy Anniversary, Harry and Louis!” posts, including my favorite, which was captioned: “Happy 7th anniversary love birds! 28th September 2013 - it’s so great to see how two beautiful friends finally did it!...”. Yeah, guys, nothing to see here, they’re just celebrating 7 years of a beautiful and committed BROMANCE, doncha know?

#harry styles #zayn malik #liam payne #louis tomlinson #the clown car #briana #nick gordon #also you can now buy Harry's daffodil necklace on Eliou's website #they're calling it the Harry Necklace but tbh i like my name better #idk if anyone else cares about the filming guidelines in LA but i spent a ton of time reading about it so here you lol #*here you go lol #ngl I’m a little disappointed about no new Louis merch but it’s probably the best thing for my bank account #song of the day!#Waking in the Dark by Only the Poets #yup thats it from me today i think thats more than enough #hahaha

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votederpycausemufins · 3 years

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next chapter of the fic with Grumbot and Jrumbot. looks like it’s going to maybe have 3 or 4 chapters, so be on the lookout for more.

Grian was the first to wake up, though not naturally, having had a bit of a nightmare. He looked around in the early morning light towards the closet, glad he had broken it before going to sleep. He then looked down to his side where Grumbot seemed to still be in sleep mode. Grian carefully Pat his son’s head before getting out of bed. He made sure neither Grum nor Mumbo woke up before heading outside and stretching his wings.

They had long since been sore from dodging Grumbot attacking him, so he flew a bit, looking around and the nearby landscapes. It looked lovely with the rising sun lighting it all up, but he was distracted as he pulled his communicator out.

Grian landed on a tree as he began to scroll through all his old chat logs before landing on one he had abandoned years ago. It was labeled with the symbol of a broken portal. Grian selected it and then started scrolling up quickly, keeping a close eye on the dates before finally stopping.

<MiniMuka> he wasn’t even in the list of people around, but he was there!

<Grian> he’s technically not a person. You said he was in the nether?

<MiniMuka> yeah, just standing there not doing much.

<Grian> I would be surprised if he was planning a rustic house to build there.

<MiniMuka> in the nether?!

<Grian> yeah, he REALLY likes rustic houses. I sort of try to keep him in my closet because otherwise he might turn everything into a rustic house. Once he’s done, I’ll put him back.

Grian sighed. That was the last time anyone had seen that creation of his. He wasn’t sure if NPG had been destroyed or just didn’t make it through a portal, but that world was gone now, and so was NPG.

“It’s not going to happen again. I can’t do that. And Mumbo will make sure I don’t.” Grian spoke to no one in particular, wiping away a few tears that formed as he put away his communicator. He then glided back home, finding the other two were still asleep. Having little else to do, he started making breakfast.

Mumbo was quick to get up when the smell of breakfast reached his nose. It also made him jolt awake enough that Grumbot also woke up. “Morning you two. How did you sleep Grum?”

“I’m not sure. It was very odd and I’m not sure how to best explain it in terms you would understand. It wasn’t quite watching a false reality, but it also wasn’t just nothing at all.”

Grian nodded, putting a plate of food in front of Mumbo and a diamond in front of Grumbot. “A diamond?”

“Well I don’t want to leave him out, and it’s not like he’ll eat real food. At least I don’t think. I can make more if you’re really so upset about it.”

Beside them, Grumbot picked up the diamond and seemed to eat it, leaving Mumbo and Grian stunned. It hadn’t gone through any slot, it just seemed to phase through the monitor screen. “I guess that answers that.” Mumbo spoke in as level a tone as he could manage. He was about to start eating his own breakfast when Grumbot spoke again.

“You lost.”

“What do you mean Grum?” Grian asked, ready to get something else for his robot son.

“You… you didn’t even vote for yourself.” The words hit Grian like a brick and he dropped what he was preparing. “You didn’t even get a single vote a-and Scar… he was the one who won. I didn’t do anything right. You trapped me in a box. None of it was real and I was just sitting there.”

Mumbo looked between Grumbot and Grian. One seemed to be having an existential crisis while the other was starting to have a panic attack. Mumbo wanted to help Grian first, but realized it would probably work better to help Grum since his crisis seemed to be what was affecting Grian in the first place. “Grum, calm down. Look at me.” He did his best to seem calm for the robot as he looked back up at him. “You did wonderfully. We were the ones who couldn’t do it right. People loved your songs and the things you made and the other hermits liked you. We never wanted you to be locked away, but at the time we didn’t know what else to do. We could have told you the truth and helped you through it, but then what? We couldn’t easily move you around so it would just end with you sad or disappointed and all alone. So we faked it.

“But now we’ve changed it. You’ll be able to stay with us and move around and you don’t have to stay focused on election stuff. Maybe you can do redstone like me, or build like your dad or something else entirely. Just because we messed up doesn’t mean that you can’t do something extraordinary now. Alright?”

Grumbot slowly nodded before tackling Mumbo with a hug. The mustached man smiled down at his son before looking over at Grian, glad to see he calmed down a little. “Now, how about instead of diamonds we get you a nice plate of quartz to munch on?”

It seemed to be a good idea and Grumbot seemed to calm down with something new in front of him. Mumbo excused himself and Grian for a few minutes before going into the next room over. “How’s you get so good with words?” Grian asked, making Mumbo shrug.

“Mumbo the chat therapist helps people who are lost internally.”

“Mumbo, this wasn’t the chat.”

“Well I was able to help, wasn’t I?”

“Okay yeah. But I still want to know, how did he suddenly know?”

Mumbo sighed. “We gave him a diamond. We built him to take question diamonds and look into mayoral databases and what not, so when we gave him that one for breakfast it must have triggered all that.”

“Why didn’t you remove it when remaking him?”

“I tried Grian, I got rid of what I knew I could, but that wasn’t much. I was scared if I changed too much, it would have done us better to build him from scratch. What would you do then? If he looked up at us with blank eyes not knowing who we were?”

Grian froze. “I…”

Immediately Mumbo was regretting his words. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. I just. Oh I’m such a spoon. Let’s just… do you want me to watch Grum while you build Jrumbot’s body?”

The builder smiled at the idea. “Yeah, that sounds nice. Then when I’m done we can switch off.”

With that, the two of them left the room to be with Grumbot again.

Grian bounced his foot as he waited. Building Jrumbot had gone much faster than building Grum. He already had all the materials, knew how big to make everything, even making the body a bit smaller since he was supposed to be Grum’s little brother. But that meant he was now just sitting on the sidelines while Mumbo worked.

Since Jrumbot didn’t have as complex circuitry as Grumbot did, Mumbo had to do more work instead of just rebuilding what had been there. It even got to the point where Grum powered down so the redstoner could go back and forth between the two bots for reference.

Because of that, it ended up with Grian sitting by himself. He wanted to try and do something to ease his boredom, but if anything went wrong and he wasn’t there, he would never forgive himself. Instead, Grian pulled his communicator out and started messaging Xisuma.

<Grian> Hey X, sorry we’re not back yet. Everything’s fine and Grum is up and running, but remember that shop that looked like Grumbot?

<Xisuma> wasn’t that supposed to be his sibling or something?

<Xisuma> oh

<Xisuma> I now understand why it’s taking so long.

<Grian> yeah, Mumbo’s currently doing all his circuits and stuff. Grum’s helping and I’m on emergency standby

<Grian> I don’t want anyone getting hurt but I’m so booooored

<Xisuma> well you’ve been so busy you haven’t said much. So more updates?

<Grian> yeah, sure. We got Grum functioning just last night.

<Xisuma> that went well?

<Grian> he was a bit confused, but I was so tired I just went to bed. I think only problem at the time was he didn’t, still doesn’t, know how to walk.

<Xisuma> Really?

<Grian> not like we originally built him with legs.

<Xisuma> that’s true. Anything else?

<Grian> he finally found out everything that happened after his initial breakdown.

<Grian> it was rough at first but it’s fine now

<Xisuma> he did? How bad did he take it.

<Xisuma> Oh okay that’s good.

<Grian> yeah, we found out he can just eat diamonds and quartz and whatnot.

<Grian> Diamonds still activate his searching of the mayoral reservoirs so that’s fun.

<Xisuma> I see

<Grian> oh thats an idea!

<Xisuma> what is?

<Grian> :3

<Xisuma> oh dear

Grian looked up from his communicator, managing to spot Mumbo climbing between the bots. It probably hadn’t been that long since he last checked on things, but he didn’t have much else to do. The builder walked over and tapped on Jrumbot’s body, snickering slightly at the yelp from inside before Mumbo climbed out. “What do you need Grian?”

“Just, hoping for some updates. Like, more than just ‘going well’ or something like that. I can’t get in there to see and even then I wouldn’t be able to tell how it’s going by looking at it.”

Mumbo ran his fingers through his hair. “Well you see, it is at the very least going well.” Grian glared at him a little. “What I mean is I’m very glad I did the past redstone circuitry for him instead of just leaving it blank. I never fully implemented it, yes, but the fact that I did it saved plenty of time.”

Mumbo sat down to get comfortable before explaining further. “See, with Grumbot, we’d already put in all the circuits save for moving about. Because of that it was just replicating everything already done. Jrumbot on the other hand doesn’t have much. For the most part I’m trying to replicate what Grum has, but I can’t entirely. If it were a perfect copy, we would just have two Grumbots, just in different bodies. The biggest roadblock would have been replacing the function that allows the connection with the mayoral reservoirs. If I didn’t have anything before, I would have been stumped on what to do. He wouldn’t have any need for that so theoretically it could be removed, but at the same time, it could damage the rest of the circuits.”

Grian spoke up to check if he was understanding this all right. “So, what you’re saying is the political stuff is essential and you needed something new and essential to replace it?”

“Exactly!” Mumbo nodded before continuing. “The redstone I already did for Jrum was functions for helping sales. I never fully implemented it since people did buy from the shop, but it was still there.”

“And so Grum’s thing is politics and Jrum’s is capitalism?”

“Yes I suppose you could-” Mumbo stopped and Grian was able to recognise he had come up with an idea. “That’s it!” Before the avian could ask for clarification, Mumbo was already climbing back into Jrumbot’s body. Not wanting to ruin whatever train of thought was happening, Grian instead sat down on the nearby grass to just listen to the sounds of Mumbo working.

Mumbo and Grian stood next to each other, looking at Jrumbot. This was their third test. The first two had gone okay, but there were still some issues. “Which of us should do the honors this time?” Grian looked over at the redstoner. “I say you since you’ve done most of the work.”

“But I did last attempt. It’s your turn.”

“The only reason I did it the first time is because I knew we would have a problem. When it works, you should be the one turning everything on.”

“Oh alright fine.” Mumbo sighed and then stepped closer to Jrumbot and pressed the power button near the base of his neck. Immediately he jumped back and the two watched as Jrumbot turned on and started looking around. “Jrumbot?” Jrum looked over at Mumbo and Grian. His motions looked like he was trying to speak, but it wasn’t working. “What? It was fine the last test? What did I do wrong?”

Jrumbot tried some gestures for communicating and slowly it worked. After some charades they decided to test if giving Jrum a diamond would help him out since some of the circuits were similar to Grum and he needed diamonds for certain functions. Indeed, when they gave him a diamond, it helped for a bit. By the time they had given him four with not much more permanent success, Grian asked if they should consider turning him off to fix things. When the question was asked, Jrumbot immediately started running off. “No! No turning me off!”

Mumbo and Grian were both left shocked. “What? But we didn’t give him another diamond? How is his voice working again?” Mumbo asked the avian, who seemed to realize just what was going on.

“Mumbo, his voice was fine the entire time.” Grian answered between some giggles. “He was just pretending to get our diamonds.” Mumbo looked between Grian and Jrum, who was currently admiring the diamonds he had gotten off of his dads.

“Well!” Mumbo huffed before walking over to Grumbot’s body. “I suppose that means we can turn Grum back on too.”

He didn’t even need Grian’s confirmation with how the avian lit up at the statement. Soon Grum was back on and was quickly moved closer to Jrumbot. “Hello. I assume you are Jrumbot, my younger brother.”

Jrum looked up from his diamonds to look at Grum. “Uh… yeah that sounds right! Look what I got!” And he held out the gemstones for Grumbot to look at.

“Impressive. Does anything happen when you consume them?” Grumbot asked with a slight tilt of his head. Jrum looked back down and his diamonds as if contemplating the question before he pulled them close to his chest.

“I don’t want to eat them! Then I would lose them!” A small hatch opened up on Jrumbot’s chest which surprised both Grian and Mumbo, not having built anything there. The smaller robot then placed his diamonds in the hatch before closing it, making sure he wouldn’t lose the items. “There! Now they’re all safe!” Jrum said proudly, placing his hands on his hips and puffing his chest out.”

Mumbo cleared his throat a little to get the attention of both of the bots, who thankfully both looked over at him. “I’m glad you two are getting along, but now that Grian and I know you’re both working, how about we take you home?”

Jrumbot was the first to answer, jumping at Mumbo and attaching himself to the redstoner’s arm. “Yeah! Let’s go there! Wait where is it?”

Grumbot simply walked over to his dads and looked at Jrum. “It was where we were initially built. You may recall existing in the shopping district as a shop.”

Jrumbot’s screen eyes lit up with animated sparkles. “Oh yeah! People got mustaches and shirts! I hated it!” And the final sentence was said in the same cheery tone as the first two sentences. Grian immediately reacted poorly and Mumbo was left stuttering out an ask for clarification. “Cause they got cool stuff but also took the diamonds I had!”

“Well, as your dads, Grian and I will make sure people don’t steal diamonds from you again.” Mumbo assured Jrum, prying the bot off his arm so he could carry him normally. “How about you two come with me and help pack things up while Grian helps make the way home?”

“Yeah! That sounds fun!” Jrum replied, making Mumbo chuckle. The smaller robot jumped out of Mumbo’s arms and ran towards the nearby house, attempting to pick it up. Grumbot followed behind to help his younger brother and lead him inside.

Mumbo looked back to Grian and gave him a hug. “See? It all worked out fine. And even if something does go wrong, it’s not like either of us are doing it along.”

Grian smiled back at Mumbo before letting the redstoner head off to the house and pack things up with the bots. The builder then looked to an open area and started using his Watcher magic to make them a portal home. It wasn’t too difficult to summon, so everything wasn’t quite prepared for the trip home, So Grian ended up just leaning against the portal and messaging X.

<Grian> The boys are both working. We’re packing things up and should be back within the hour.

<Xisuma> Where are you likely coming in? I’d like to be there when you arrive.

<Grian> Probably where we left. The roof of Grum’s old box. That or it’ll just be spawn. I can’t be completely sure without using more power than I’d like to.

<Xisuma> That’s understandable. I’ll be at the box and can fly over if you four end up at spawn.

The avian put his comm away and then watched the house, seeing the movement coming from inside through the windows. Some laughter, mainly from Mumbo and Jrum, was loud enough to make it to Grian’s ears, making him smile even more. Mumbo was right. It was going to be fine.

The portal did indeed end up sending them to the top of the box and Xisuma was already there waiting. Before the four of them went through, Grian gave the bots, more specifically Jrumbot, an explanation of what was going to happen. It took a little longer than anticipated as Jrum asked plenty of questions. His dads were happy to answer at first, but soon they had to try and get the robot to save his questions for later.

The second they were all through, Jrumbot zoomed at Xisuma and nearly pushed the admin of the building with his momentum. “Hi! Are you Xisuma?” Mumbo was quickly running over to help save X from the energetic robot while Grian worked on closing the portal. But before the redstoner could reach them, Xisuma answered affirmatively and was tackled to the ground with a hug. “My dads said you’re sort of like their dad so you’re my grandpaaa!”

As Mumbo helped Xisuma up, the admin just chuckled a little. “You certainly are an energetic little one. Here, I have a gift for you.” Jrumbot started bouncing a little when X said this, only to stop when the admin pulled out a communicator.

“What’s that?” Jrum asked. He wasn’t happy about the gift not being diamonds, but at the same time he wasn’t going to refuse a gift, so he took it anyway.

“It’s a communicator. Everyone on this server gets one when they join. Your brother already has one because I knew he was going to be joining, but you were a little bit of a surprise, though a welcome one at that.”

“Oh, okay!” Jrumbot chirped a little, making Grian look up at the noise. He looked up just in time to see Jrum running over towards him and Grum, showing off his new comm to the latter of them. “Look what I got from our grandpa!”

As Jrum continued to chat with his brother, Grian made eye contact with Mumbo. “Did he just…?”

“Well, they were both meant to be a mix of us. I guess when putting everything in, Jrum got a bit more of you.”

Xisuma brushed himself off a little before looking over at the bots. “Well, I certainly see the resemblance to Grian. I wouldn’t be surprised if we had another sort of war with the two of them around.”

Grian feigned offense at the statement. “How dare you ever think I would do such a thing. Especially around my children. Why I would never do such a thing. Only a pesky bird would and I am not at all a pesky bird.” And to drive home his sarcasm, he fluttered his wings slightly.

“Of course, no pesky birds here.” Mumbo crossed his arms, though he also smiled.

“Well, I’m sure you two want to settle in, so I’ll give them a quick rundown of what they need to know.” Xisuma spoke up, clasping his hands together in a clap. “I’m sure I won’t need to go over as much since they haven’t been on many other servers so telling them rules that may differ shouldn’t be a problem. How about tomorrow we see if we can’t gather everyone else to officially meet them.”

“That sounds great X.” Mumbo nodded before letting the admin walk over to the bots. He and Grian had to pull Jrum off of X more than once before the admin was done and flew off.

Getting everything over to the jungle was a bit more of a hassle since that involved more work then just walking through a portal and carrying everything a few meters. For the most part they were able to just carry the shulker boxes in their inventories, but they didn’t exactly have a good way to move the bulky chargers they had created for the bots. The two also had some mobility issues from being new to their bodies, so giving them elytra and giving them a crash course in flying didn’t seem like a good idea. Boats were also out of the question for right now since they didn’t know how well the bots would take to water.

The last option was the nether, and fortunately Mumbo still had extra obsidian to make a portal with. Grian stayed behind to break the portal once the other three were through since he could easily fly home along with the fact that using Mumbo’s home portal was better than trying to use the mess of obsidian that was his own portal.

The avian beat them back, though mostly due to the fact that the bots had never been to the nether and also didn’t have much gear to their names right now so it took longer to get them through, even with how the area was built up. Grian giggled a little at the obviously singed mustache of Mumbo while the bots looked non-plussed and snacking on some quartz. “There’s two of them. There’s only two of them. But it was like herding cats. Worse actually.” Mumbo rambled as Grian just continued to laugh, giving the redstoner a water bottle to pour over his mustache, a tiny bit of smoke coming from it as it was completely put out.

“Do we want to set up two of the chargers now?” Grian asked, trying to distract Mumbo. “Or should I work on building them rooms at my place?”

“Set up the chargers!” Mumbo answered a little too quickly. “Or, well. If it’s just the three of you, you could go to your base and I can set the chargers up here while you do that!”

“You just want me to deal with them by myself now since you had to, right?”

“Of course.”

Grian smiled and walked over to the bots. “Alright, who wants to try out a minecart and go over to Dad’s mansion?”

“Me! I do! I do!”

#hermitcraft #grian #mumbo jumbo #grumbot #jrumbot #xisuma #npc grian #avian!Grian #watcher!grian

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stuckinapatriarchalbullshitland · 3 years

Text

🙂 - ɟ

Hiii babies and dear Anons 👋🏼🤗 Here’s another post with the answers to the asks Mari sent me. Enjoy 🙃

Hi @sawwyouuinadream 👋🏼😄 I’ve already talked about how C exaggerated for the sake of the songs in my ‘💭- ɟ’ post (8th question) [click on the #f anon of this post to see all my others]. As for the rest, you need to understand the difference between our normal life and theirs, especially when they were in the group. You can’t compare your life and what you would do with your girlfriend in their place simply because they’re completely different things. Any parent of famous artists who gets the chance to spend time with their child when they can, seizes the opportunity. I saw it with 5H, I saw it and keep seeing it with Ari, I saw it in Taylor’s documentary, and many others. But not all artists have this luck.

5H were far from home, always around the world, without parents most of the time, and with fans who recognized them. Unlike the other parents who didn’t always have the opportunity to be with them because of work, the most present were Sinu, papa H (Jerry, Ally’s dad), and mama Dre (Andrea, Normani’s mom; as much as Sinu and continued as Sinu even after the hiatus). The only difference is that Camila suffers from depression and variants of OCD (diagnosed in 2015) and for these reasons, Sinu has always tried to be as present as possible. She only became a regular presence after C’s explosion in early September 2016. And, honestly? I don’t know where Camila would be without her mom. I don’t think she could have gotten through most of the things. I don’t think she would be in the industry anymore.

Now, I’d like to remind you of something else: we only see 5/10% of their lives. And that 5/10%, is ONLY what they want to show. You said that Sinu always accompanied C on dates? That’s not true. We saw Sinu with them a couple of times when they went shopping, once for dinner at Katsuya’s, and once at the beach in Australia. And these are literally only five times in what, four years that C was in 5H? Do you really think those were their only dates? Or that those can even be called dates and not just spending time with the mother-in-law? Come on. Try to look at it differently. Try to look at it from a broader perspective. Try to look at the big picture.

I send you a hug 🤗

No, dear Anon. Lauren was together with Camila. That whole conversation was based on Camila teasing Lauren. That episode was another confirmation for me regarding their first kiss. Lauren answering “Kind of” because Camila literally nearly passed out from nervousness is one of the things that amuses me the most.

Oh and, dear Anon? Bread Simplified, aka I don’t know what lips are, was just another one of her PRs. I don’t know how this is still something to doubt about. 75/80% of all Hollywood couples are fake, and as I said earlier, we only see 5/10% of what they want to show us about their lives. I’ve said this before and will write it again: “Any PR relationship involving Camren is simply this: fake, and for publicity and narrative purposes”. Real relationships, dear Anon, are not public ones. They’re the ones we don’t see.

I’m still a little bit confused about your ask actually if I have to be honest, dear Anon. I’ll answer based on what I understood.

None of the five of them are with Syco Music anymore because it has integrated with Sony Music Entertainment and therefore doesn’t exist anymore.

Only Camila and Lauren are with Syco Entertainment simply because only the two of them were asked to sign. Simon never cared about the group per se. He wanted Lauren and Camila from the start and he got them. He created an opportunity to prepare them for that world and for their eventual solo careers. How? By creating 5H. By creating three products (C, L, and 5H) at once that would make him money.

Because, dear Anon, as twisted as it sounds, it’s part of their publicity. I’ll explain myself better. Camren sells. From the beginning. A large part of the 5H fans became their fans BECAUSE of Camren. The labels still use them when needed. For labels, it’s okay to get people talking. It’s okay to get them to speculate, take their name out there, create buzz, create gossip, everything’s okay, EXCEPT confirming it. The important thing is the publicity. The important thing is to sell what they want to sell, and many times, they use Camren to do it. And it works. It works EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. Plus, I think both C&L also had fun doing it to “keep the boat afloat”. More in the past than now tho.

I know about the rest of the pictures because it was said a while back by a guy who said he was yet another ‘insider’, dear Anon. This guy even published an email that was supposed to be from 2017 from TMZ to Roger in which they were supposed to have a meeting to discuss the extension of the agreement made not to publish the dossier. It’s actually old news, and it indeed seems strange to me that you’re only finding out now 🙃 Has anyone ever talked about it here on Tumblr?

But anyway. That he was an insider, I have my serious doubts. That the email picture was specially created, perhaps by him himself, I’m sure of it because it looks more fake than a plastic flower. That TMZ actually has a dossier on them, is very likely because this is another one of the many ways paparazzi agencies make money.

Dear Anon, I guess this ask of yours is due to your reading of my last post. If you’ve read it, then you have also read the sentence that I will now copy: “Everyone’s ready to point the finger when they don’t even know what is really going on behind the scenes”. You’re doing the same thing. You’re doing the same thing because all I see here is Roger did this and Roger did that, but you don’t know that. You don’t know why he did certain things. You don’t know why he didn’t do certain things. You don’t know why he handled some things in one way and some things in another. You know nothing, yet you’re pointing the finger.

I understand that you’re speaking based on what you see, believe me, I understand, but you’re judging without knowing. We know this PR is for Skittles, so what do you know if the deals made were exactly for Roger to promote him more? What do you know if the deals made were exactly for Roger to do or not do certain things? And more importantly, what do you know that Roger no longer has Camila’s best interests at heart? Just because of this show? Come on!

I’ll try to be clearer this time because I’ve noticed that many, like you, didn’t get the big picture of my last post. The labels decide everything. Camila can choose certain things, propose ideas, and be more liberally creative, but she doesn’t have the last word. If Camila comes up with the idea for a video she wants to make, but the labels don’t like it, then she can’t make that video. If Camila wants to perform a song in a certain way, but the labels don’t approve of a thing, then Camila has to change that thing in order to perform it. If the labels say no, then it’s no. Periodt.

Camila accepted the PR. COVID has changed things. She couldn’t expect such a thing. Hell, none of us could have expected a worldwide pandemic. But things turned out this way, and now she’s miserable. The choice she had initially made has backfired on her, and there’s nothing she can do to change that because it’s a legally binding contract. Neither she nor Roger, whom I remind you is also an attorney, can do anything about it.

I made this little scene for you. I hope that with this, you’ll see things a little more clearly.

*During the meeting*

“And that’s the idea” Roger says as Simon continues to look at the various set designs and documents by nodding

“So.. what do you think?” Camila asks anxiously and with a small hopeful smile

“I think we only need to change a couple of things, but for the rest, everything’s fine” Simon replies

“Really?” Camila asks excitedly

“Yes, really” Simon replies with a chuckle due to her enthusiasm “Good job, Camilla”

“Yay!” Camila cheers towards Roger. She’s too happy to care about the cringe due to the mispronunciation of her name. She’s used to hearing him call her that for years now.

“What are the changes you were referring to?” Roger asks him

“Oh, you know, this and this” Simon replies, turning the set designs towards them “It’s a little too…” “Gay?” Camila asks with a laugh, finishing his sentence

“We knew, but she wanted to try anyway” Roger says, indicating Camila with his palm “So, by changing those two things, we’re ready to go? We’re gonna shoot the video in a week”

“Yes, I approve. Everything’s all right” Simon says, handing the set designs back

“Thanks, Simon” Camila says, getting up together with Roger ready to leave the room

“Oh and, Camilla? Remember what we talked about” Simon tells her as soon as she gets to the door

“But-” “Remember what we agreed on” Simon says, interrupting her

With a sigh, Camila nods and turns to look at Roger who smiles at her sympathetically. With another sigh, this time of acceptance and determination, Camila positions herself behind Roger, who’s bending his knees to get down and is bringing his torso forward.

“Um.. what exactly are you two doing?” Simon asks, confused and curious at the same time

“When you tell me to jump, I ask you ‘how high?’, right?” Camila answers him as she climbs on Roger’s back

Simon nods with an even more puzzled expression.

“I’m helping her jump from higher” Roger explains to him

*the end*

This is just a silly example, but I hope it helped you understand the dynamics better. I also copied and pasted another piece of my previous post as a reminder: “If Roger does certain things that you may not like at first glance, before accusing him, please wait. Wait till you see why he’s doing what he’s doing, and then if you really don’t like it, then point the finger. But if you have to do it for no good reason, then don’t. You’d only going to look worse after. Same thing for Camila. They have a reason for doing what they do, so just wait before speaking and judging.”

Have a great day too, dear 😊

I don’t think you’re gonna like my analysis, dear Anon, but you asked for it, so here it is.

I’d like to start by saying that Thinkin’ Bout One is a half-demo. It’s not a completed song and it’s from ‘The Hurting. The Healing. The Loving.’ era, so even before the album title changed to ‘Camila’. I’m talking about the very beginning. When Havana wasn’t even remotely ready to be complete, or recorded if that’s why. When I Have Questions had just been recorded or was about to be recorded. I’m talking about the end of 2016.

The demo is pretty messed up because there is no intro, verses, pre-chorus, chorus, etc., like in a normal song. The quality and the way the demo is structured reminds me a lot of the GarageBand Camila times. To be honest, I think that’s how it was recorded. I think Camila created the demo on her own and then she abandoned it once she started recording other songs that would adapt and fit in the true direction of the album.

The reason I said I don’t think you’re gonna like my analysis is because this song, it’s not about Lauren. I have reason to think this song is for someone else, but without dwelling on that, I’ll explain why in my opinion it’s not about Lauren through my interpretation.

“Where you at

Come baby show me where you at

Finally got time off work

Tryina disappear off the map with ya

What’s love gotta do with it

This my vacation time

Bathin suits and tan line

Thirst trap for your timeline”

Camila is asking this somebody where they are. Camila was still working with Lauren in 2016. She knew where Lauren was because she was with her, this somebody wasn’t. She’s asking them to meet and spend those days she had free together. She’s asking them to go together to a place where they could be off the radar. A place with a warm climate. And she’s not asking them to see it as a romantic getaway, but just as a vacation. Love was the last of her thoughts given what she was going through with Lauren that year.

“Num num num num num

Pass the henny not the rum

I go num num num num num

If I decide to give you sum

Talkin talkin talkin

All this time that we been rockin

Hey”

“Sip a lil this

Sip a little that

Now this ain’t nothin but a fact

I need you come and take control”

This vacation that Camila proposes also included alcohol and other activities, if you know what I mean. I’ll explain the slang she uses here to indicate those two very things.

In case you didn’t know, num is the slang for making out. Henny is the slang for Hennessy, which is a brand of cognac. It’s used a lot together with coke for a simple two-ingredient cocktail, and indeed, Camila specifies that she prefers henny over rum (rum and coke) in her simple two-ingredient cocktail. Sum is the slang for some. Now that you know, I believe you can put the pieces together and better understand the puns she used here.

And that’s all. There’s nothing about Lauren for me. There’s nothing deep about it. Just another distraction. And for me, for my timeline, this event happened during the 7/27 tour break. The break that lasted from July 6 to 26 before starting the North American part.

Hello to you too dear Anon 😄 No, I personally don’t think those scenes represent her experiences exactly as they happened. I think she and Dave (Meyers) represented her experience in a cinematic and straight way, but with symbols that represented Lauren.

For example, the fact that Dylan plays the piano is to represent an artist, aka music, aka Lauren. The flower on the back of his shirt in the kiss scene: Lauren. The book’s scene you mentioned? The scene is represented in winter with snow, yet in her memory, they’re both represented dressed in a light way, aka ‘In Miami, where winters are hot’ (Sangria Wine’s verse 2) [or even in L.A. since the winter climate is much more similar to the spring one]. They both like to read, so the book was a perfect clue. Alcohol and fights were represented in a much stronger way than I think they happened in reality because we all know that Lauren is not a violent person. The moon? There’s not even the need to explain it. Oh and, the fact that she’s holding hands with herself at the end of the video is also a representation of what we saw in the Havana music video. The “I do love you. But I love me more” that we saw there. With that scene at the end of the Consequences music video, Camila shows us that she has finally managed to love herself.

So dear Anon, to me, that video is just an artistic representation of how things went. And thanks. I hadn’t watched that video in a long time, but I went to re-watch it for you, so thank you, dear 🥰

🤸🏻‍♀‍🤸🏻‍♀‍🤸🏻‍♀‍

Aaand I’m done 😄 I hope I was helpful in this case too. As always, I’m available for those who have questions, so feel free to ask 😊 Thanks once again to you for asking me and Mari for making this exchange possible 😍

As usual, remember to be kind, to others and to yourself. Be a good example. Be patient. Be safe and take care of yourselves. I send you virtual love and hugs 🤗🤗🤗 I love you, babies. Always with love, F ❤️

___

This was awesome, thanks again F. BTW, the marks on the asks is a small detail I couldn’t erase but you can read them anyway, so sorry bout that.

#submission #f anon #anon #asks #answers #that small story with Simon

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vaguely-concerned · 3 years

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The Mandalorian Chapter 11 reactions; the ‘the sea is a harsh mistress’ edition

- on first watch this wasn’t really one of my favorite episodes. I think it’s something to do with... one of the many things I love about the mandalorian is how it made the star wars universe feel HUGE. big and surprising and unknowable, there could be fucking anything out there man we don’t know. so having first bo katan show up and then ahsoka being set up right after (quite aside from who’s rumoured to play her, which is an entirely different can of wormy beans) in additon to opening the season on tatooine... eh. I’m not that into it, it feels like shrinking the world. we haven’t even gotten to see any other type of force user yet. it is only early/mid season tho so they’re probably going to pull some unexpected twists on us

my opinion might change with rewatches too, that happens quite a bit with this show!

🎶I’VE COME TO TALK WITH YOU AGAIN🎶

honestly I had kind of a hard day yesterday and watched this the next morning and kept pointing tiredly to the crest like ‘it me tho’

- I was unreasonably happy about seeing the calamari flan again hahaha he’s been keeping that shit in his pockets for a season and a half now (didn’t he pay with some at one other point too?)! also the sound effects for them are SO EXCELLENT, I keep thinking about how well this show does texture which is wild considering how it’s filmed

- the warm pat din gave frog lady’s arm when he thanked her and said goodbye 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 I love the small ways he’s thawing

my heart ached so much for him at this point, he just looks so small and tense and lost, like a kid who’s lost his parents in a supermarket

(he keeps his hand on the blaster the whole time too so he knows this is a bad scene but now they’re right out in the middle of the ocean already soooo)

- din’s very very very dry sense of humour is so blessed. ‘a bowl of chowder for my friend’ faklhfsadkjlfhsadkjhfsd

the baby’s look when he poked the squid thing with his knife too -- yodito’s like ‘dad is a wizard??’ haha. some good baby & dad stuff in this one

- oh din... side quest boy, side quest booooooyyy

- the shot when bo katan helped him out of the water is perfectly mirroring the scene of bb!din being pulled up to safety by the mandalorian in the flashback, which seems Very Intentional

I Extremely Do Not Trust Her in the larger scale tho. I think it’s important that din knows now that he was raised in a very specific offshoot of the mandalorians ant that there’s some Stuff he hasn’t been told, but I also think it’s crucial to remember that her pov is not unbiased either and she, in fact, already has an established tendency to selectively share information with him to manipulate him into fulfilling her goals. (which he realizes because he keeps saying ‘that is not my mission, my mission is the child’ and I could not love him more). hell, I’m not sure exactly how ‘the children of the watch’ were positioned within death watch, but she was fucking death watch too for the longest time! and she hardly left for particularly noble reasons, she just didn’t like maul! she already lost mandalore like twice, do we just have to trust that third time’s the charm or what!

she lied to him about the scope of the mission to force him into a position to do what she wanted (fully knowing he’s responsible for a child!!) and she called that ‘the way’ just as easily as the thing about not letting his bravery be forgotten! big red warning lights, NO! I think the thing is that din is having to find his own ‘way’ of being mandalorian (/how does one be a person exactly help?? relatable content, and he’ll get there in the end I’m sure he’s so good), but her way is no less fucked up to me than the children of the watch from what we’ve seen so far. she’s good at killing imperials though which is of course a mark in her favour

(considering that the episode gives her the epithet ‘the heiress’... yeah that’s probably a hint that she’s loyal first and foremost to her entitlement, getting the position she considers hers by right of inheritance. guess we’ll see if the text agrees with her)

- ‘mandalorians are stronger together’ yeah that’s probably why the cosmic balance makes sure they’re mostly engaged in being at each other’s throats lol

- so I might be feeling kind of sketch about these guys but on the other hand... when that one lady saved the baby and then promptly took off her helmet to reveal she looks like t h i s ?

you better BELIEVE I was ready to fall down on one knee and propose right then and there holy shit

- ...wow if he didn’t have the jet pack din probably would have just sunk like a rock and drowned there huh 😨 that armour’s pretty heavy, turns out

- in happier news: din has become so good at reading what the child is expressing and responding/labeling the feeling for him! that’s so important to his development! ‘I know you’re hungry’ and both telling and showing him there’s a solution! still a bit of an issue that he thinks he can inform the baby of things like it’s a reasoned adult and have it understand, but we’re getting there we’re getting there lol

- that poor lady guiding them in for landing and sounding more and more worried fhkasjdlhfkjsdlahf (and he fucking TURNS OFF THE RADIO or whatever he’s using to talk to her through sdkfhaksdfhjs he takes a precious split second just to cut her off asfdjhaslkdfsdfhsda I love my salty dad)

- when the fisherman asshole tells mando he knows where to find more of his people there’s the tinkling bell sound in the background music, I think it’s meant to convey almost childlike longing for belonging and connection, for finding someone who’ll know what to do?

- when they took off their helmets and baby looked up at din like ‘???dad what the fuck? can you do that???’. (or like he just sensed his father taking a shitload of psychic damage all in one go)

- the way din didn’t start breathing again until they got the baby up from the water and he had him in his arms... the way he held him... sladfhasdklfhsjakdhfjsakldhfsakjldhfsjkadhfjaskdhfskajdhfjsdakhfslakhfskladhfsakljdhfjskadlhfkjsld

that whole scene was like a nightmare, so desperately unpleasant, in a way it mirrors the way the mandalorians have been hunted down and pummeled these last few generations, this must sort of be what it feels like to him subconsciously

- din isn’t particularly inflexible as a person, after the initial kneejerk rejection he did listen to what they said and is carefully considering it (he did say ‘this is the way’ back at the end!)

- the baby’s babbling when he wakes up and looks around in the beginning sounds half like ‘baba?’ and I almost had a heart attack

- loved how greasy and awful and dumb all the empire dudes were (and the comedy on board the ship too it was good for me)

- the boob plates huh. shit they’ve shown with the armorer that they don’t have to do that in any way shape or form and they still brought the boob plates back :/ I guess it’s so they match up with the rebels/clone wars look, evoking that ~*era*~ and everything, but I don’t have to like it lol

- I feel so validated in my theory that the razor crest is symbolic of din’s sense of self (now with beautifully added commentary!) after this haha (and also so so scared now they might be ditching it for a new ship eventually). it’s in pieces, his world view is going to pieces and can’t be patched together the way it was before, from what he knows he’s about to deliver the baby to someone else who’ll understand/love/deserve him better (I do think that feeling is still in him) and he doesn’t even have the certainty of the code anymore to fill the void. oh buddy.

the discomfort I felt when we got back into the cockpit -- into where it’s supposed to be familiar and safe! -- and saw all the ocean junk lying around, making it feel weird and changed and dirty (it probably smells like rotten seaweed in there now :( no likey)... I mean it was also very funny to see the pilot’s chair held together with a literal fishing net, but please favreau leave my dad’s car/ego alooooone

- baby laughing his little bum off at din catching the small sea monster before it got him and then munching it......... the ‘there’s nothing in this world my dad can’t fix’ safe energy.......... I’m so scared we’re coming up on something din can’t fix

- knitwear in star wars: I didn’t know I wanted it, but I am ELATED with having been given it

- moff gideon’s amazing evil voice... back in our ears, in our hearts, I gleefully hate him

- at least din’s armour is clean again after that (awful) swim? one must appreciate some silver linings along the way I suppose

- din goes straight for the main pilot’s seat once they get the imperial out of it, so he must feel really secure that he’s probably the best man for the job; he is genuinely a good pilot! (and after this I am wondering even MORE who taught him. who raised you within the mandos din??)

- even while everything is new and scary and falling apart we can live safe in the knowledge that at least frog lady and frog husband had a good day and will have a good and happy frog life together with their frog children

couple goals tbh

(I don’t necessarily know how it works for frog people but I uh. guess they got busy quickly huh hahaha good thing mando didn’t turn up again until later)

#star wars #the mandalorian #the mandalorian spoilers #the mandalorian meta #I've mostly seen people love this episode so I feel a bit like a buzzkill about mostly being 'meh' about it but what can you do lol #I actively disliked a lot of the clone wars mando stuff so I'm biased I suppose

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keytomythoughts · 3 years

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Perfect Imperfections | Chapter 2

Chapter Index

»»—————————————-　

“Wait, you’re making your debut soon? You were still a trainee when I was in high school, right?”

He nods, one hand on the steering wheel while the other hangs outside of the car. “The company told me a month ago, so we’ve been practicing like crazy. Fortunately, practice ended early today, so I was able to swing by and pick you up from the train station.”

I smile smugly, punching his arm playfully. “Aww, you did miss me. Look at that.”

He snorts but doesn’t refute my statement.

The evening sky is dusted in shades of rose, gold, and soft orange, the mix enveloping the horizon similar to a canvas being brushed with aesthetic paints. The clouds hang low, the sun casting shadows on the tallest of buildings with its warm, pale-yellow glow. The wind doesn’t nip at us sharply, instead shifting to a more calming, serene breeze.

The car ride shouldn’t have lasted as long as it did, but I realize halfway that he was purposely taking the longer routes home. Sensing my lurking apprehension from our phone call hours ago, my brother picked up on that cue and decided to distract me as much as he could before we inevitably had to return.

Something my parents failed to realize.

“Oh right, I forgot to ask,” Jaehyun stares ahead and switches lanes with ease, heading towards yet another highway, “how are Eunwoo and Moonbin?”

I did mention that Eunwoo and Jaehyun are close friends as well, so it wasn’t surprising when I found out that he knows of my friends circle. Well, those two really. Imagine my horror when I realized that they were the same age and friends. Shocking at first, but I got used to it. Besides, it’s not like we were awkward about it or anything. Moonbin also knew my brother, so we all essentially got along fairly well.

I push the strands of hair away from my face, glancing down at my phone in my lap to find no new notifications from them since I last texted. Sighing, I look out to my right. “They’re fine. Both of them are gonna be in Seoul for the summer, so we’re just planning on hanging out until college starts.”

“Have you guys decided where to go, what you want to study?”

I shrug my shoulders. “Not really. I mean, I’ve been thinking about medicine at Korea University, but,” I sink into the seat a little, sighing, “you know it’s not up to me.” My voice drops to a whisper near the end, my eyes casting towards the road ahead.

Jaehyun turns to me, taking his hand off the steering wheel to gently pat my arm. “I know, sis. I really do. But still,” he removes his hand and places it back on the wheel, his eyes refocusing back on the road, “you should tell them what you want to do. Who knows, they might listen this time.”

I snort, crossing my arms over my chest. I tilt my head back against the seat, turning to look at my brother. “You really think so?”

To this, he doesn’t respond. How could he? It would be a lie meant to comfort me, but we both know the truth. He simply sighs, running a hand through his hair and leaving it behind his neck. I heave another sigh as well, both of us knowing that things may not work out the way we would like them to.

This wouldn’t be the first time anyways.

We exit the freeway and merge onto the familiar streets of my neighborhood. Soon enough, we were pulling up into our driveway, the nervousness replacing the initial excitement of being back home. Jaehyun turns off the engine, neither of us making a move to leave the car first. Of course, with my nerves shot and breathing shallow, there would be no way I could go inside alone. Lucky for me, I’m not.

But why can’t I shake this sick feeling?

Jaehyun reaches out and squeezes my hand once, flashing that stupid grin of his at me. “C’mon, let’s go inside. Your oppa will protect you~”

I swat his hand away, my nose wrinkling in disgust but the laughter bubbles in my throat. He rubs my head again before removing his shades and stepping out of the car. Before I can unbuckle and step out myself, Jaehyun already stands at my side, holding my luggage. He waits patiently until I close the door behind me, my steps wavering slightly as I stand before the elaborately carved wooden door of our house.

Jaehyun nudges my shoulder, smirking. “It won’t bite, Hyu.”

I roll my eyes as I follow right behind him. He unlocks the door and turns the doorknob and disappears past the threshold. I trail close behind him, a breath catching in my throat as I walk towards the living room. Everything was the way I remembered it, minus the new decorative pieces presumably from my father’s visits abroad. Living as a surgeon requires him to embark on trips overseas, sometimes not returning for months at a time. My mother, on the other hand, doesn’t actively practice surgery, instead deciding to teach as a medical professor at a top university in the northern district of Seoul.

Four years and nothing has changed, huh?

Jaehyun states that he’s going to put my belongings in my room before coming back down, and I nod at him. Just as he ascends up the stairs, my mother emerges from the kitchen, smoothing down the front of her lavish apron, a tight smile adorning her small, petite face. Her reddish-brown hair is worn in a small bun, her glasses hanging from her shirt. I won’t lie to you, my mother is a beautiful woman, even in her late forties. Smart, rich, and insanely polished. Not only her, but my father is the same as well. It’s no surprise where my brother gets his enviable features from, while I question what leftovers were given to me. I never believed myself to be smart or beautiful, like my parents. Nor was I carefree and sociable, like my brother. Sometimes I question if I was ever adopted, seeing as I seem to be my family’s outlier. The odd-one-out. Yet, Moonbin and Eunwoo highlighted those little bits of me that I’ve shamed myself on. Where I saw disappointment, they saw genuity. The “flaws” were my strengths. They prided me on the things my parents didn’t view so favorably.

How I wish they were with me right now.

My mom approaches me, enveloping me in a rather tight embrace. Wasn’t expecting that, but I reciprocate the action anyway.

“Hyuna, dear, I’m so glad you’re home,” she pulls away, grabbing me by my arms as her eyes scan my face, smiling, “and you’ve gotten so much prettier. I see your aunt took care of you well, I’m glad.” She places a hand against my cheek.

I smile nervously. “Happy to be back, mom. Sorry for not informing you and dad that I was coming back today.”

She shakes her head, tapping my cheek lightly before moving away from me. “Nonsense, dear. Your father is in his study, so he’ll be down shortly. I know how very tired you must be, so let’s set the table for dinner.” She shuffles back towards the kitchen, soon bringing out various utensils and a stack of plates. I immediately grab them from her and arrange the items on the table for the four of us. My mom kisses the top of my head and smooths my hair down, returning to the kitchen so she could bring out the meals.

Something’s not right here.

My mother isn’t really the affectionate type. While it was blatantly obvious that I wasn’t the favorite child, that title reserved for Jaehyun (again, no surprise there), they didn’t really hate me, if that makes sense. They just tended to leave Jaehyun to do as he pleases, while I would have to listen to them. I don’t doubt that they care for us both, as good parents should, but I can’t help but feel disheartened when they would dismiss my feelings and decide to enforce their own ideals on me. Claiming that this would be “the best for me”.

As much as I respect my parents for raising me to be the ambitious, hardworking woman that I am, a part of me wishes that they would see me as a person with hopes and aspirations of my own, not just an extension of their legacy.

How could they decide what’s best for me when I don’t even have the ability to voice them myself?

Moments later, my father descends from the stairs, my brother walking down from behind him as well. It seems like he’s been busy with office meetings, seeing as he’s still dressed in his formal beige button-up shirt and black dress pants. His glasses sit perfectly on the bridge of his nose, his hands stuffed into the pockets of his pants.

I bow my head in respect. “Good evening, Father.”

He acknowledges my presence with a curt nod. No surprise again. He’s a man of few words, but when he does speak, he’s blunt and gets straight to the point. Wasting time and skirting around the truth has never been his philosophy. He practically radiates with superiority and firmness. From the stoic expression on his face to his neatly styled brown hair, my father was nothing short of a posh man in his early fifties. The best surgeon, the perfect doctor, the staple of all admirable men in South Korea.

In short, he’s practically worshipped by professionals across the nation.

Naturally, my brother and I take great pride in our parents and our family’s rather successful and lavish legacy. Of course, with this reputation, it’s expected of us to uphold it. Education must be nothing short of challenging. Careers must be everything but disappointing. Appearances had to be pristine, no flaws or shortcomings apparent.

You get the picture.

My brother attended college for a short while—a year and a few months, if I’m not wrong—before dropping out once he got scouted by a reputable entertainment label. I don’t know specific details, but I do know that my parents weren’t initially too pleased to hear that he wanted to pursue a career as an idol singer. Nonetheless, and with the things Jaehyun was allowed to get away with, this was just another thing to be added to that list. I figured my father would come around and think that the Jungs shouldn’t be limited to more “sophisticated” fields—medicine, law, business, and the like. Branching out and including fine arts, including performance, would only solidify the notion that our family is meant to dominate every field imaginable with integrity and poise.

My mother and I finish setting up the table and call for the rest to sit. Seeing the variety of dishes laid out, you would think it was a special occasion. Surely they weren’t celebrating my graduation as class Valedictorian. I haven’t told them any of my accomplishments, but I’m sure they had their means of getting access to my reports even before I was made aware of them. Connections, the most vital thing in the Jung family. It’s what helps us climb ranks and secure top positions in society. Why we’re so heavily respected, as well as feared.

Jaehyun and I sit adjacent to each other while our parents are seated across us. We begin to eat in silence. Nothing too different from how we had family dinners back then, albeit the absence of my father or mother from late meetings or an overseas conference. To be quite frank, it did seem strange to have a meal with all of us present after so long.

My father suddenly clears his throat. “Hyuna, I heard from the teachers at your high school that you performed excellently. I’m pleased to hear this.”

I pause, my eyes training up to meet his steady gaze. Though pleased, he didn’t seem to express it facially. A direct complement is seldom said, so it comes as no surprise that it was the only thing I, or my brother, would be receiving.

Jaehyun nudges me, realizing that I hadn’t responded as my father awaits with the same steady expression.

“O-Oh, thank you, Father.”

He nods, placing his utensil back down on the plate before clasping his hands in front of him.

“Now that you’ve graduated, have you considered your possible college options and future career plans?”

This. This is the very question I’ve been dreading.

I can feel the air around me grow thick with anticipation. His words hang in the air, the words to respond with the scripted lines I’ve recited endlessly in my brain unable to fall from my lips. I suddenly recall what Jaehyun and Moonbin had told me prior, to try and voice my opinions in hopes that they may be heard and properly considered this time. After all, I would never know if I didn't try. Here’s my chance.

But, my father continues upon my brief hesitation. “With your academic record, you would have no issue enrolling in the top universities within the country. Even abroad, if you considered that as well.”

I gulp, my fingers clenching tightly in my lap. I force my rapid heart to slow its pace in fear that it may burst out of my chest, my breathing trying to be as calm as it can be. I can feel Jaehyun eyeing me from the side, and my mother stops eating as well.

There’s silence. One which I break when I open my mouth to let the words bottled up in my mind spill out before I can properly think them through.

“I want to stay here, in Seoul.”

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3

#moonbin x oc #moonbin ff #moonbin fic #moon bin #cha eunwoo #jung jaehyun #astro #nct #fanfiction #my writings #mine

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leupagus · 4 years

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My Stationery Box, or: The Douche Chest, or: How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love Being A Terrible Parody Of Myself

So I really love to write letters, and have since i was a kid — when i cleaned out my grandparents’ house I found a few I’d written in grade school, and my parents’ files are chocablock full of the weird collage type things I sent to them in college.

I’ve also been a huge insufferable fucking snob about stationery since way too young (yes I did have a fountain pen phase, no it did not go well) and have been collecting fancy paper and cute cards and assorted weird writing paraphernalia forever. Up until recently, things were just kind of haphazardly stuffed in various drawers and shelves and I could never actually find any said fancy shit when I wanted it; but a couple of months ago I discovered an adorable little chest of my late mom’s that had previously housed, I think, her knitting and has mostly just been collecting dust since. And voila: The Douche Chest was born:

(Pictured with my elderly laptop and coffee with my coffee warmer, which I STRONGLY ENCOURAGE everyone to buy one day when we’re not under worldwide quarantine, seriously it will change your life.)

Keep Reading for some top tier stationerdery

First off, the stuff that helps me write! I still use my family address book, which was purchased sometime in the early 80s and has the name and address of everyone my parents ever cared enough about to want their name and address, which is actually not that many people. I keep it updated and have added a few people, but mostly rely on my phone’s address book. Mostly I like it because it’s got a lot of my mom’s handwriting.

My planner, which has a whole correspondence section where I keep a record of who I write to regularly, when I write to them, and what kind of stationery they usually get (because there are different types and you don’t want to give a correspondence an inconsistent letter-reading experience! Yes I know, I can’t believe I’m like this either) indicated by the m, s, x, l, b notations. That will be relevant later. Also yes the planner is where I scribble down both story ideas and my gratitude journal. This is what I’m saying in re: yikes.

At my own house, I have a whole huge box of letters I’ve gotten over the years, mostly organized by sender and date. Since I’m at my aunt’s house for quarantine, my correspondence is all being kept in my dad’s old... I dunno what to call it, basically it’s a trapper-keeper type thing that I literally never saw him go to work without. (A running theme of this tour is that a whole lot of this stuff is inherited from/given to me by my parents and grandparents.) Inside is also various labels that have come in handy when addressing packages etc, as well as our local neighborhood directory.

Next up is my pen bag, which is — I mean, it has my pens. I prefer writing with a black .5 tip rollerball type pen, and by “prefer” I mean “I cannot abide writing letters with anything else and will go to Staples and buy a new box rather than use a ballpoint pen except obv not right now, which makes the bag real important for keeping track of all my special pens.” Also pictured: my grandpa’s ancient letter opener that I’m pretty sure he stabbed multiple people with, and my blue Le Pen which I use to annotate my letters when I’m reading them through before sending. I KNOW.

This is my assorted letter-writing stuff storage box (no we’re not even at the cards yet this is TERRIBLE); please note that I sort of jerryrigged this box together myself, which will be another running theme of this tour. Glue, roller whiteout thingies, washi tape (which I don’t really use but people keep sending me?) post-its and my address stamp because no matter what I do, the fuckin’ Audubon Society refuses to send me a single donation request with cute stickers showing my address even though they’ve sent my deceased dad like three THIS YEAR. Anyway. Also please note the incredibly awesome initial stamp thing — I came up with the rough design in college and use it in place of my name a lot, but I went to leoniebunch and they transformed it into this super professional and lovely design that I want to use for the rest of my life. Not pictured: the fucking wax seal I also had made with that design, because yes, I’m like this.

WE’RE STILL NOT DONE WITH THE PARAPHERNALIA: here’s the other misc. stuff that I use on the regular. Cup with sponge because we’re not really licking envelopes these days: tons of weird stickers that I’ve collected, YET MORE PENS, including rainbow ones because one of these days I’m going to write to one of my friends with alternating rainbow colors and they’ll have to murder me. Also pictured: the letter opener which I forgot to put back in the pen bag, as well as my dog’s nail clippers and brush because that’s a handy place to keep them. Also also pictured: my dog, who does not help in any way with letter writing.

OKAY FINALLY ONTO THE STATIONERY, Jesus just writing this all out is making me both proud and ashamed.

I’m sure you noticed in the first pic how everything is meticulously, not to say monomaniacally, labeled. Some stuff might require a little bit of explanation; some stuff is pretty wysiwyg though. For example, BEAR CARDS, which:

(These are sent exclusively to my nephews, who go absolutely apeshit over them every time. Come to think of it, I have a LOT of cards/letter stock/etc that is just for one person or one set of people, which maybe I should talk to my therapist about.)

PUN CARDS are likewise exactly what you think they are; they’re the most recent addition to my hoard, having found them at Powells when I went to Portland in February. They are extremely My Kind Of Thing.

Then you’ve got things like BIRTHDAY CARDS, THANKS, POSTCARDS which like — guess what:

(Please note that of these birthday cards, all but two were actually inherited from my grandmother who passed away in 1986. See if you can guess which two are my purchases.) (Also I’m running out of thank-you cards but to be fair I am rarely grateful so this should last me another few years at least.) (Also shit, I didn’t take a picture of the postcards I don’t think? Whatever, they’re postcards that I’ve either inherited from my parents or collected over the years. There’s also a very odd collection of wolf-themed cards that SOMEONE in my family collected, and that I have been using exclusively for allighater because she’s the only one who could ever appreciate them enough.)

Then there’s the BLANK CARDS and BLANK AND WRITTEN CARDS WITH/WITHOUT ENVELOPES, because sometimes I just need to know what I’m getting into before opening the boxes. I’d say a good 50% of these were inherited from my folks, with the cutsier ones being my own purchases. The cards that these boxes originally contained are looooooooong since used up but they’re nice boxes and that meme about adulthood being an endless debate over whether or not you should keep a box because it’s a really good box is accurate as all hell.

(There are a lot of cards in here that I bought when I was like, in college — those square ones, for example, were purchased at Faces in Northampton when I was in college and I’m probably never going to actually send them which is kind of ridiculous but see: this entire post.)

And finally, the actual letter-letter stationery! Which I also have an embarrassing amount of! First up is what’s labelled MADOC TREE CARD/LETTER because I honestly had no idea how else to describe it; it was inherited from my grandma who everyone called MaDoc (on account of her being both a ma and a doctor, go figure) and it’s really lovely. I doubt it’s the original intention, but I like to unfold the paper and use both sides of it, because I always have a lot to say. These are used only for family members on MaDoc’s side, and of those, only the ones I really like, which accounts for there still being a lot left.

Then there’s the X-LARGE paper, which isn’t actually that large — it’s just normal computer-sized — but in context is the biggest stuff I’ve got. All of this paper is from my mom, who loved using cute themed paper, and I use this stuff mostly for the friends of hers I keep in touch with (which is actually kind of a lot).

Then there’s the letterhead I use for — okay, so like, we know by now that I’m deeply weird, but this is probably just DEEPLY WEIRD, but whatever, you came this far. So I found a metric shitton of 6 3/4 envelopes in amongst my parents’ office supplies — I have literally zero idea why they had about 5 100-count boxes of these envelopes but I’m one of those people who can never, ever throw shit out, so! I gathered together all the letterhead that they’d also collected over the years from the various universities and hospitals they worked at, cut said letterhead down so that it a) didn’t have University of Tacoma or whatever still on it and b) perfectly fit a 6 3/4 envelope if folded three times. The resulting shape is a little... odd, I’ll admit, but it pleases me greatly and that’s the important thing. In fact this has been my go-to correspondence choice for a couple of months now.

(Also pictured: the cover for this hinky-ass box I made out of a Beekman 1802 box from when we went to their store for their Rose Apothecary popup shop. Zero regrets. Not pictured: the really cute pad of paper I also use for these envelopes that’s a more normal size and shape because where’s the fun in showing you normal stuff?)

And finally, my pride and joy, my Crane Stationery, some of which I have had since I was in high school and my mom bought me a box of it for my birthday (I told you, running theme). It comes in small, medium, and big; yes, I absolutely have rules as to who gets what size of these, too. The medium box kind of fell apart a few years ago so I cobbled a new one together; Crane stationery is notable for not being as exciting as that cover might imply. I’m also kind of pleased that I still have the airmail stationery that I got in college that apparently isn’t sold anymore, which I find baffling because what the fuck is the point of international correspondence if you don’t have to use special stationery? Anyway:

(In re: the lined sheets — I actually have them for every size, because I loathe lined paper but also loathe writing crooked, hence these guides that I put under each sheet as I write. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ )

So that’s the complete guided tour! If you aspire to have a collection as viscerally unnerving as mine, feel free to send any questions my way. You’re welcome/I’m sorry.

#'you're welcome/I'm sorry' is ALSO a running theme #anyway a whole three people on twitter wanted this so tadaaaa #stationery station

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snowdice · 4 years

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Gaps in His Files (Part 12) [Relabeled; Refiled Series]

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Relationships: Logan/Patton

Characters:

Main: Logan, Patton

Appear: Remy, Virgil (but only in the epilogue)

Summary:

Logan Berry has learned many things the last 10 years: a lot of math and physics, a bit of humility, and how to be a hero being just a few. Through his education, his experience teaching, and his exploits as the superhero Bluebird, he’s changed in a lot of small and large ways. He has recorded these changes in well-organized documents and files. He’s even had to create two new file designations: a red one for files about his moonlighting at Bluebird, and a light blue one dedicated to his boyfriend, Patton.

When Bluebird is targeted by a memory device and all of those 10 years of progress suddenly disappear, Patton Sanders and Logan’s extensive files are left as his only resource to get those memories back. But what is Patton supposed to do when there are clear gaps in his files? And what does he do when he is one of them?

This is set 25 years before Sometimes Labels Fail though it’s story is completely independent of it and it is not necessary to read that one first.

Notes: Superhero AU, memory loss, past child abuse, past child neglect, unhealthy ideas about ones place in relationships, emotional suppression, self-deprecating thoughts, medical procedures mentioned, very brief unhealthy views of sex

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11

This one is very heavy. Patton is spiraling hard and expresses some very unhealthy deep seated views of himself and his role in relationships. So be warned and if you want to wait to read this, feel free. Basically all of the warning in the notes apply in this one except medical procedures.

Patton’s back ached from falling asleep on the floor next to the couch once again the night before. It had been horribly quiet in the apartment in the last 24 hours since Patton returned from the hospital to find Logan gone. He didn’t know what to do.

They’d defaulted back to looking through the files that they’d already pretty much read through at this point and Patton was starting to wonder if there was even any point. They’d looked through the red ones last night and the green ones this morning before rotating back to the blue ones which were now spread all over the coffee table.

Patton had snagged one of the fluffier blankets from the closet and curled up under it, but it didn’t make him feel any better. In fact, he might feel worse because he couldn’t keep insisting that Logan pet it like he normally would.

Logan didn’t even seem to care enough to voice his obvious unhappiness with Patton. His silence just made Patton feel worse and worse and made his thoughts spin and spin. Logan was tapping his fingers against the table thinking about something. Usually Patton would respond to that action with patient fondness, but today it just made him want to curl up into a ball wondering what he was thinking. Patton’s mind kept returning again and again to that place it had been in on and off the last two months except that place was getting darker and darker every time he came back around to it.

Ever since the rejected proposal, Patton had tried to figure out what it was about him Logan didn’t like. He’d tried all sorts of things. He’d tried not inviting himself over to his apartment as much, not being as pushy about Logan taking care of himself, offering sex less, offering sex more, not being as pushy about spending time with him, being more quiet, letting him decide what they did on dates, not talking as much about his job, not depending on him as much when he was stressed, not crying in front of him when he was overwhelmed. He’d tried. He’d tried so many things.

The problem was Logan. Or at least Logan before.

What Logan hated most in life was change and he’d clearly gotten used to how Patton naturally acted over the years. Thus, he kept getting distressed when Patton tried to change something.

When Patton avoided his apartment for over a week, he’d asked if Patton was mad at him and then since Patton had that Saturday off, he’d managed to cajole Patton into spending all day in Logan’s bed napping and cuddling.

The not pushing him to care for himself had only lasted a few hours. Patton knew it had to be annoying, but he couldn’t stop himself from reminding him to eat breakfast and Logan hadn’t seemed mad when he’d started back up. He’d even brushed a kiss across his cheek when Patton handed him a plate of bacon and breakfast potatoes.

He seemed to be able to tell when Patton wanted to have sex with a startling amount of pinpoint accuracy, like he had Patton down to a science. When Patton wanted it, but didn’t start something, he initiated it himself and he looked at him with abject confusion when Patton tried something when he didn’t want it.

He showed up to the hospital to take Patton to lunch in the cafeteria when he didn’t mention meeting up for lunch because he assumed the reason was that Patton was too busy that day. He pushed when Patton didn’t speak much, citing that he was worried something was wrong and he insisted on his input on dates before he’d move forward with any plans.

Patton had kept quiet about his job for three days before Logan had gone and talked to Remy behind his back to ask if something was wrong at work. Under pressure from both of them, he’d spewed out the buildup of stress all over the place. And it was so hard. It was so hard not to cry about it when Logan pressed soft kisses to his cheeks and temples and asked him if he was okay.

But now Logan wasn’t used to Patton and wasn’t set into patterns that he probably didn’t actually like, but just allowed because he wanted to be nice to Patton and was used to it. The problems with Patton were becoming apparent every time Logan side eyed him.

Patton had been hoping that maybe he could figure out from this version what parts of Patton he really did not like. Then Patton could hold more firm about getting rid of those things once Logan got his memories back. He’d definitely appreciate it after an adjustment period. That is if Logan even wanted him after this. He hoped he’d at least give Patton a chance to fix himself.

Patton was good at pretending. He knew how to cut pieces of himself off to get people to love him back. He’d had a lot of practiced. Make sure to do your homework at the dinner table at mom’s house so she knows you’re not being lazy. Cook when you’re at dad’s house so dinner is ready when he gets home from work, but make sure you’ve cleaned up by the time he gets home, so he doesn’t see you cooking. Don’t let grandma cook potatoes; she doesn’t like them and will blame you for them being on the dinner table. Never turn on the television at mom’s house; it rots the brain. Make sure the television is on the sports channel by the time dad gets home. Don’t touch grandma’s remote no matter how loud the volume is. Sit up straight for mom. Don’t cry in front of dad. Be quiet for grandma. Pretend dad doesn’t exist for mom. Call dad’s new girlfriend mom. Don’t try to correct grandma when she calls you by your dead grandfather’s name. Get good grades. Get into a good college. Get a job that pays well. Don’t complain. Don’t get in trouble. Don’t be gay.

Patton knew how to do it all. Logan had never asked it of him. Never, not once had he told Patton that he needed to fix himself or that he had to change for him; he deserved it more than any of them.

“We’ve talked a lot about me,” Logan said surprising Patton out of his churning thoughts especially since he had barely spoken all day. “but what about you?” he asked. “Tell me more about you. Tell me about our relationship. Why do you want to be with me or at least the me with my memories?”

“I…” Patton started. “There are a lot of reasons.”

“Then tell me one.”

Patton bit his lower lip. “You read my papers.”

“Your papers?”

“I’ve written a few research papers and you looked them up and read them and tried to understand them because you wanted to be able to talk to me about something I was interested in. That was the first time in my life that someone looked at me and it felt like they actually wanted to know me. And you kept doing things like that. You remember my coffee order and bring my favorite sandwich to the ER even when you know I’m in surgery and I can’t be there to see you so you just leave it with someone else to give it to me when I’m done. You eat the stupid cafeteria food at the hospital when I only have time for a 30-minute lunch just to spend time with me and after the first time we had sex, you got up early and cooked me an omelet because you didn’t know how to cook anything else. You try to find ways to help me feel better when I’m upset even though it doesn’t come naturally to you and you’re willing to throw popcorn in my mouth from across the room with your powers just because I ask even though you think it’s silly. You once took me on a picnic to a park 5 hours away because I mentioned how much I loved it when a group of us went there on a retreat during medical school even though you don’t like eating outside because of the bugs. And you didn’t even complain… well, I mean, you did complain, but only enough to make me laugh, not so I thought you really resented being there with me. When we go to parties and I say I want to go home, you pretend to get a migraine so we can leave early and sometimes we end up having sex in the car outside. And even though you complain about how annoying you think Remy is, you know he’s my friend so you still make a point to make an effort with him and hang out with him even when I’m not there. So…” he swallowed. “Yeah.”

“You really love me,” he stated, eyes intent on him and unreadable.

“Every part of me loves you Logan,” Patton said, gripping the soft blanket in his fingers. “You can have whatever pieces you want.”

“Whatever pieces?” he echoed.

Patton forgot for a moment that the man in front of him did not have context, that he didn’t and couldn’t understand what Patton was asking. “Look,” he said. “I know there is something wrong with me. I know there are parts of me that annoy you or make you angry, but if you just tell me what they are I’ll change them.”

“You think I don’t like all of you?” Logan asked.

“Clearly not!” Patton said, standing up suddenly and throwing the blanket off onto the ground. He paused and took a breath, forcing his tone to be calm and clinical, like he did when he got too emotional at work. “Look at this,” he gestured to the piles of files in front of him: blue, green, and red. “This is everything from your personal files to your work files to the files for your alter ego, but where am I? You have the receipt from the first fast food order you bought with your credit card, the invitation from your five-year high school reunion that you didn’t even go to, and your sixth-grade report card. But there is nothing in here about me. Not really. I am not important enough for you to keep. But I can be if you just tell me how. I can be whatever makes you happy. If you love me at all, I will rip myself apart until I’m what you need.”

Logan looked him directly in the eyes. “If I love you, I don’t want that.”

Patton blew up. “Then what do you want, Logan?!” He snapped his mouth closed and looked away, tears that had been building since Logan had lost his memory, since Patton’s marriage proposal had been rejected, since his mom had first called him stupid because he’d gotten a B on a math test in the 5th grade, springing to his eyes. “I’m sorry, I didn’t…” he swallowed and stood, a picture of calm. “It has been a stressful couple of days,” he said, flicking a tear off his cheek. “I think I need to go back to my place and rest for a while. I’ll come back tomorrow morning and we can… I don’t know, try aromatherapy or something.”

Before Logan could say anything more, Patton beat a hasty retreat.

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Part 13

#sanders sides #logan sanders #patton sanders #logicality #tsss #superhero au #memory loss #past child abuse #past child neglect #emotional suppression #self deprecation #gaps in his files #labeled universe #relabeled; refiled #adriana writes #unhealthy views of sex

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notmyrick · 4 years

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Also long side note/analysis:

In s4e10, Rick was part of the resistance against the Galactic Federation in his 30's which he said he grew out of.

In the comics (#34) while he was in the band The Flesh Curtains (which some sources say started in his college years, not sure when it ended though) , he also was starting off as a weapons dealer and got his first client/ friend Krombobulous Michael (Mike). After making the deal, in the following panel, Mike goes off in a killing spree and if you include the initial gun, and assume he got all his guns from Rick, he has a total of 4 guns, which at max means he met Mike 4 times to deal him weapons. At least from the first deal. Then we see another deal with Mike and Rick, this would be the 5th transaction, which this is where Rick confesses he fell in love. He has shorter hair, looks happy, and has the vibe of slowly becoming simple Rick as he even tells mike that he should fall in love. Same comic, when mike meets his wife amy they have a love montage where in the end they got married and surprise surprise, Rick is there with his iconic flask drinking as one of the groomsmen or as the best man wearing his common getup.

So this gives us a rough timeline that by the 5th transaction, Rick met his wife Diane when he became a well known weapons dealer and by the time Mike got married to Amy, he either had problems in his marriage or Diane already divorced or died. Most people married around their late 20's and early 30's and assuming Rick did the same maybe on the late side. He was also still part of the resistance against the government.

Also in Rickshank Redemption, does "weird" Rick give off any I'm against the Federation vibes? Like the outfit has the same feeling of space Beth? Anyone?

At the ending of Auto-Erotic Assimilation beth says:

And I know I sound like mom but I can't sacrifice this whole family's safety just because I'm afraid you'll leave again,

So this is something Diane would say, maybe not word for word, but certainly the same tone, vibe, and message.

This begs me to question how did Rick threaten his family's safety? For the smartest man in the universe, you would think it be easy to slip under the radar of the government considering that Earth wasn't really under the Galactic Federation until Rick was in his 60s/70s(his current age) in Rickshank Redemption. Sure they sent a couple spies, but they didn't give Earth an olive branch to join anytime prior to this episode. To me this means that Earth was under watch, but they werent worth much of the Federation's time. So Rick could be considered "not a threat" in his 30s (debatably). Also in this episode, it shown during this time (also debatable) that he was trying to figure out interdimensional travel. So breaking down the jobs Rick had, he was a weapons dealer, he was still part of the resistance against the government, he may or may not be working on earth to bring money to the family, and he was an at home scientist. That's a lot. It's nice to note that Diane was supportive of Rick's science endeavors although she might not know much. It looked like the family didn't have much conflict, at least in the early years of the marriage.

So what was Rick doing that was threatening the safety of his family? From Diane's/Beth's words, he was always leaving and the threat always starts when he left. So here is my 2 scenarios.

The Citadel of Ricks. When interdimensional travel becomes a Rick thing, they created a "clubhouse" or government where only Rick's exsist. But since this is an earlier time, it can be assumed that the Citadel was very "primitive" at this time. Sure there are a bunch of Ricks and a group of geniuses can achieve a lot, but not nearly the end product we see in the show. Rome wasn't built in a day and most definitely the Citadel wasn't either. Maybe a day and a half at best lol. Anyway, I just dont think that the power the Citadel has now, is what they had back then. They can be threats individually, but not a threat as a whole, at least not yet. And since a lot of non cooperative Ricks view this as a clubhouse or party, it could be safely assumed that it was used as such initially.

The Galactic Federation. In his 30s he was still part of the rebel alliance. Which one can assume, he was still a rebel during his marriage. Now this I see much less of a threat. As shared previously, I believe that Rick can go under the Federation's nose and stay hidden. As a matter of opinion, if the Galactic Federation knew where Rick was, which presumably he was soely labeled as a criminal instead of the smartest mammal who discovered interdimensional travel, they would've already threaten/take over his home planet and more specifically threaten his family to get him to concede. Which I believe is not the case because Diane couldn't sacrifice this whole family's safety which implies the threat was more looming and mental, than it was physical and present.

In Diane's case the Citadel of Ricks, yes can threaten the safety of the family despite being Rick, knew and are aware of Diane and Beth. They even have the advantage of portal tech and know the dimension they come from. Diane and Beth are essentially sitting ducks in this scenario and this can be a looming and mental threat compromising the safety of the family. However there are two caveats.

Beth's adoration

Rick's presence

While the Citadel is a threat, it would be more of a threat to Diane than Beth. Both caveats are linked to Beth. They can psychologically torture Diane with multiple Ricks. As a spouse, you hope the person you love comes back, but with the interdimensional travel the person who comes back may not be the person you married. In addition, this doesnt threaten the safety of the whole family, it only threatens Diane. And it seems to me as along as (a) Rick is cordial and father like to Beth, she would be willing to suffer the mental abuse of multiple Ricks. This is assuming that the threat came to them and as stated before, I'm less inclined to believe this because while yes it is a looming threat and definitely a mental one, it is also a physical threat because there is an actual entity invading and I don't think there was any physical factor when Diane spoke these words. Not only that, but it has to threaten the life of one Rick sanchez along with the rest of the family.

The term "losing you" can be interpreted in a lot of ways, but the most common I think of is death. If the Citadel was threatening another version of himself, then it would make sense that they would target the Sanchez family when they are together. And the only way to threaten Rick is to kill his family, and the only way to threaten the whole family, is to kill everyone. Which again I think, the threat should be more psychological and mental, than having an actual physical threat. This also contradicts that the family's safety is threatened when Rick leaves. For Diane, this is an inescapable scenario where safety is never guaranteed. Either way it should have enforced Rick to stay by his family's side instead of leaving.

Which brings me to the second point: Rick's presence. If they did torture Diane with multiple Rick's that wasn't her Rick, to Beth's childhood, her father would have more presence, even if he tried to sneak around the child (I'd like to think that Beth was like a bloodhound when it came to her dad). Also in her words, "I'm afraid you'll leave again" implies she constantly saw her father leave her mother, herself, or both.

With the Galactic Federation, I can see a little more meat to this. If Rick was still a rebel and actively participated in the front lines, Diane is essentially married to a solider, who has a very realistic possibility of dying on the battlefields. In addition if Rick is the weapons dealer and if he is as infamous as he claims to be, then he paints, not only, a target on his back, but his family's as well. Assuming his world state is similar to ours with the exception of us not having a Rick, then Rick is the first and only human to interact with other intelligent, sentient life forms. To Diane, Rick is easily recognizable. So a psychological looming threat is possible and can even manifest into something worse due to imagination. Even if the truth says otherwise, as long as Diane wasn't aware of it, she would just think the worst.

Now moving on to Diane and Beth. Don't take this to heart bc Diane had no speaking lines only rare appearances and mentions here and there, so I'm taking a few liberties with Diane. You could say these are a few headcanons I had of Diane (subject to change). Beth said she "sounds like mom" which I translate Beth is bringing up common issues or problem arguments they had when she was young. Essentially her argument is very reminiscent of the missing/late Mrs. Sanchez whether it was tone, topic, or opinions. So instead of word for word of what Beth said I made Diane say: I can't risk our family's safety just because I'm afraid of losing you. Which, like beth, sounds like an ultimatum, and to further emphasize that point I made her say in addition to that: Choose Rick, come home or stay out. In the episode Rick essentially implies that the creation of Portal tech is what caused the divorce or death of Beth's mom. Although there was a fabricated backstory, the show also implied that what was out of the shoneys were real. And we have a real memory of Beth and her mom standing infront of Rick's green portal in between Rick's favorite sports blooper and where he was in 9/11. To me there must be a connection with the portal and Rick's wife. So here is where the headcanon or possible backstory of Rick's marriage. I believe that Rick was still part of the rebels against the government during his marriage, that the federation was the looming threat that may compromise the safety of the Sanchez family. I believe that Diane was supportive, but was always frightened when Rick would be gone days at a time without a single word. So Diane actually proposes that Rick call her whenever he was in trouble. Depending on the Rick, he either calls her constantly to the point where he abuses it and depends on her to get him out of a sticky situation or he doesnt call her at all to the point where she is informed by a close friend of Rick because they were worried for Rick. Either way, it stresses Diane out to where she is jaded and worried at the same time. In this scenario, she saved rick from gods know what and essentially snaps. She confronts Rick to either come home or stay away because Diane realizes he's no good trying to protect the galaxy and being a father/husband, but he could excel if he focuses on one or the other.

Anyway this is merely for me of I ever wanted to explore this concept of Rick X Diane, or do like a one shot of this exact scenario.

#rick and morty #rick sanchez #diane sanchez #beth's mom #ricks wife #mini analysis #long side note #possible one shot #related to picture i drew

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queen-scribbles · 3 years

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Lisa Shepard vs Batarians

Behold, a meta about Lisa I’ve long wanted to write, inspired by this post about Torfan(got kinda long for just a reblog) and motivation provided by @fourthage‘s Mass Effect giveaway. (I’m much better about finishing things when I can give it a deadline, lol)

----

Lisa is my Colonist/Ruthless Infiltrator Shep, and let me tell you, that background combo made her really interesting to play(through the first two games, at least; my computer crashed before I had a chance to import her to ME3, rip) bc she has this big, glaring problem with batarians. The tl;dr is Mindoir was deeply traumatizing and no batarian ever did enough to counter the extremely negative image she has of their race as a result. (apologies for slight stream-of-consciousness rambling, I tried to rein it in, but I think I was only partially successful >.>)

So we start, obviously, on Mindoir. Lisa’s the oldest of four with three younger brothers; Justin, Finn, and Connor, and had two best friends; Javier and Laura. Life was routine and uneventful and the only thing she cared about the larger galaxy was getting to explore it with Javi and Laura after they all graduated.

And then the batarian raid happened. Lisa didn’t see her parents die, but she did see friends die in the initial attack, as well as Laura’s dad. She had to watch Finn and his best friend(Talitha) get dragged to a shuttle. She, Javi, and Laura hid in a storage shed with their remaining younger siblings(one of Laura’s sisters was gone, too) in hopes of keeping them safe. They spent the next three days in there. They were found by a few batarian patrols, somehow managed to kill them all with bare hands and makeshift weapons(or stolen, Lisa got a pistol off one she killed), even as their own numbers got picked down, younger sibling by younger sibling, and then Laura, and then Javi, until.Lisa was the last one left, memory etched with hearing her best friends and younger brothers, brothers she’d promised her parents she’d look out for, die very terrible deaths.

She was found by a couple soldiers from the rescuing Alliance patrol, and actually attacked them when they first came in the storage shed. They had to calm her down, and one went so far as to pull off his helmet so she could see they were human and weren’t going to hurt her. He introduced himself as Gabe and guided her out of her personal hell, both literally and figuratively. After everything she’d witnessed and heard and knew had happened to the colony, to her home, at the hands of the batarians, Lisa didn’t feel the least bit guilty for being glad the Alliance killed every last one of the slaving bastard scum they found. She’d lost everyone in the world she cared about to those monsters, she had every right to be glad they paid for it.

The soldier, Gabe, stuck with her until she’d made it back to Earth and escorted her to the foster home that had agreed to take her in. checked up on her a few times, offered to let her live with him and his roommates(another man and a woman, all three of them soldiers) if she wanted to. She took him up on that, and by the end of the third or fourth month, he was big brother and best friend rolled into one. Being on Earth meant she didn’t really have much(if any) direct interaction with batarians, but she was still working through her trauma and every time she heard them mentioned in news reports it was batarian pirates attacking a civilian vessel or batarian slavers raiding another colony--human, turian, whatever, all it did was reinforce her hostile view of them as a race.

She joined the Alliance military when she turned eighteen, feeling it was the best way to act out her gratitude of them saving her. She still missed her family and friends, of course, but she was healing and adjusting and while batarians still get her hackles up, she wouldn’t go out of her way to cause trouble with them. Largely because that would reflect badly on the Alliance, and she doesn’t want that. She proves to be an excellent soldier, tech genius, and near-unparalleled sniper, which is what gets her the rec for N-school(courtesy of Captain Anderson, who was Gabe’s CO. Gabe introduced them the day she enlisted). She excels in N-school(she’s always been the sort to thrive on challenge) and is clearly going to graduate with flying colors, so she and Gabe work it out--he’s coming for the ceremony, they each manage to get leave for the following week, they’re gonna spend time catching up and celebrating and just get to see each other face to face for the first time in... over a year.

And then, the week before graduation, Gabe is killed rescuing a diplomat’s kid from, you guessed it, batarian pirates(he’s one of only three KIA on that mission, which doesn’t make it sting any less)..That is when they cross the point of no return in her eyes. Two separate groups of batarians are responsible for the deaths of her family twice over. Clearly this was not a “few bad individuals” thing; this is a failing of them as a people(A people who have enslaving others enshrined as part of their culture to the point of calling it discrimination when they’re not allowed to practice it).

She is a driven, pragmatic, determined individual who wants to represent humanity and the Alliance well and so works just fine alongside every other race in Council space. She’s always willing to help, also always willing to make the hard calls to get a job done bc she learned early that people die. You can’t save everyone every time. You still try your damnedest to do it, but sometimes you can’t. And sometimes people die as a result of your decisions and you have to be able to live with that. She can.

And then TORFAN. Well, first Elysium, and then Torfan. By this point, she’s N4, risen to Commander, and absolutely willing to push her squad however hard it takes to accomplish their goal. (In any circumstances, these just happen to hit a tad closer to home than usual) The fight through Torfan’s tunnels to the pirate base is brutal, and there are several times her men point out maybe they should turn back. But she pushes on bc their mission is to take out this group of pirates. In her mind, batarians are already a threat, given their culture of slaving, piracy, and utter disregard for life and others in general. If they get away with attempting a full-scale attack like they did on a world like Elysium, they’ll be exponentially more dangerous. So there have to be repercussions and they have to be swift and they have to be brutal and unflinching and if she’s the one who doles that out so be it.

It costs her 3/4 of her squad, but they do it. They fight the pirates to the point of surrender and then Lisa shoots them anyway. Her mission was to eliminate the enemy, and she’s A) worried the batarians are surrendering as a show, with no intention of actually being prisoners, and B) convinced even if they did surrender, the Hedgemony would demand their return as “political prisoners” or something, with good odds they’d be released after just enough time this “incident” will have faded from people’s memory, and she doesn’t want to risk either. So the dozen-odd surrendering batarians still.die. And while she didn’t take pleasure or satisfaction in doing it, she doesn’t regret it either. Her thought process is somewhere along the lines of “These are sadistic, murdering, slaving scumbags, who have the audacity to ask for the mercy they would never in a million years show their victims. The galaxy is better off without them.”) She doesn’t care it gets her labelled “The Butcher of Torfan” and that people look askance at her when they know her record. She got the job done, the galaxy is just that much safer, and she’s not going to lose any sleep over batarians.

She makes N7 and gets the Spectre nomination bc she pushes herself just as hard as anyone under her command, always gets the job done, and--aside from batarians--has no issue working with other races. When it comes to anyone else; turians, asari, hanar, whoever, she’s all too happy to follow Kaidan’s “jerks and saint, just like us” philosophy and judge them on an individual basis, but--and I’ve actually had her say this in fic--”If you ever find a saintly batarian, let me know and I’ll pin a medal on their chest my-damn-self”. Between what’s known of batarians as a race and culture and her own first or second hand experience, there is nothing redeeming about them in her eyes. (And it’s a very good thing she didn’t run into any during that... week after the Talitha encounter in ME1, bc she probably would have ripped them to shreds with just her bare hands and her omnitool after hearing what that poor girl went through.) She’s not going to go out of her way to gleefully/vindictively slaughter them, but she’s not feeling too charitable or sympathetic toward them, either. If I may make a cross-franchise reference, Lisa’s feeling on batarians are very similar to how Fenris feels about mages in DA2, only unlike him, she hasn’t gotten any examples they’re not all Like That(TM).

As of the end of ME2, she has not seen any evidence to counter her view of batarians, so it’s a view she’s gonna go into ME3 holding(whenever I get around to completely redoing her game), and I don’t see her changing it much at this point. It’s a flaw, and it’s one that’s going to persist probably her entire life, but it made playing her so much fun. (especially since my two previous Shepards were 98% Paragon ANGELS who are best described as bleeding hearts. xD)

#lisa shepard #mass effect meta #hooo boy that got long #torfan #mindoir #tried to stay vague about what she saw on mindoir but if it's still bad enough i should tag let me know #mindoir was BAAAAD

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princessplantasaurus · 3 years

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Sponge AU Masterlist (for drabble requests and more!)

Alright so I literally just realized that I’m out here asking people for drabble prompts and vaguely mentioning my AUs but...a lot of newer sponge followers found me after the proshot and therefore weren’t around for these AUs?? So here is a masterlist of my Sponge AUs! I’m currently accepting any and all drabble prompts for any and all of these AUs and I’m also willing to answer questions or give some headcanons about them should anyone be curious! I’m also willing to do AUs of these AUs, such as, say a soulmate AU taking place in one of the AUs listed below, for example. 1. Regular Humanized Musical AU Basically exactly what it says on the tin. Based on the musical, all the characters are/appear human. Wrote quite a bit for this before, can be found here. 2. Regular Humanized Musical AU except Karen’s a robot Same as above, except while everyone else is a human, Karen appears human but is a robot. Sheldon built her originally as an assistant for his (then) new restaurant, and somewhere along the way she developed romantic feelings that she never expected him to return (but obviously, he did). Typically a little more angsty or in the hurt/comfort genre than the regular humanized musical au, often drabbles took place much before the musical, in the early days of Plankton and Karen’s relationship. Wrote quite a few of these, can be found here.

3. College AU Ah yes, the one that started it all. Basically a humanized college AU but this was the main one I wrote for. There was a fic posted on ao3 and also several drabbles. First year student Edward started at college in Bikini Bottom with his high school boyfriend as his roommate. When his roommate cheats on him during frosh week, he eventually works up the nerve to request a move. He ends up rooming with fellow first year students Bobby and Patrick, who were best friends from day one. Bobby works at an on-campus restaurant as fry cook, and eventually gets Edward a job as cashier, replacing Sheldon, the former best friend of their student manager, a fourth year student named Eugene Krabs. Eugene and Sheldon were best friends since elementary school, and went to the same college with the plan of graduating with degrees in business and food science and opening their own restaurant together. When Sheldon stated dating Karen, however, it through a wrench in their friendship. Eugene knocking up his girlfriend and now having to worry about being a father on top of graduating and managing the restaurant has put a lot of stress on him. Meanwhile, Sandy Cheeks, a first year student, just got kicked out of the sorority she only got into since she was the daughter of an alumni. There’s so much more I could say about this AU since this AU is the most “my baby” of all of them but I’ll leave it at this. 3a. Coffee Shop AU An AU of the College AU that featured Bobby as the campus’ resident barista, who deemed himself cafe cupid as he tried to pair up both Sheldon and Karen, and Perch and Edward. Wrote a small handful of things that can be found here. 4. Battle of the Bands AU Team of Tres, 3 twenty something best friends (Bobby, Patrick and Sandy) who have been playing as a pop rock band for a few years, and are finally entering the Bikini Bottom Battle of the Bands, where the winner gets signed to a major label. They think they have it in the bag, until they realize last year’s runners up, Chum Bucket, who toured with the Electric Skates as their opening act, are back to compete again. Chum Bucket is a duo, fronted by leading man vocalist Sheldon Plankton, who considers himself a bisexual sex god rock star and likes to maintain this image, often bringing fans backstage to make out with them. Doing literally everything else for Chum Bucket is the second member, Karen, who writes, produces, and arranges all their songs, while also live mixing and DJing behind Sheldon during sets. What no one knows is Sheldon and Karen have actually been dating for close to 10 years, something they’ve been keeping secret in order for Sheldon to keep up his ‘image’ with the fan base. Feeling the need to add a little extra edge to the band, Bobby recruits Pearl, the teenage daughter of his day job’s manager, after hearing her sing one day and realizing she’s a better lead vocalist than he’d ever be. Pearl’s dad doesn’t exactly KNOW they’re doing this. And why, pray tell, is Bobby’s next door neighbor always complaining about their music? What could Edward possibly know about music, anyway? (When I was initially going to write this as a fic I kept Edward’s role in this a secret and tbh I still kinda want to unless someone requests a drabble prompt that involves his involvement.) I did write a little bit for this au, all of which can be found here. And now onto the stuff I never got around to writing! 5. Monsters and Aliens AU This one’s gonna be vague as hell because this started as a vague pitch of “Spongebob Universal Monsters AU” that me and my friend Bella kept snowballing in DMs (specifically while I was in the stock room at the place I worked at the time one day, I remember this vividly for some reason??). So basically you got Sheldon who’s a vampire, Sandy who’s a weresquirrel, Squidward as a Phantom of the Opera type, and Patrick who’s a Frankenstien’s Monster type. They are all basically being held in a house arrest type situation, free to live in their little house on the outskirts of town but not wanted by Bikini Bottom as a society since they’ve all wreaked havoc on the town before. Spongebob is town’s local hero kid. Ever since he was young, his upbeat unbreakable positivity and unwavering stick-to-it-iveness have been utilized by the town to stop disaster, including sending him to save them from the monsters multiple times. When a race of alien robots invade and threaten to not just destroy and conquer Bikini Bottom, but the world, the town decides it’s best to send the monsters at them like a little monster army. Spongebob, worried for his monster friends, decides to spearhead this process so that he can help them plan and train. (Karen is also involved in this AU, as one of the alien robots who “defects” to the “good side” because Plankton “sucessfully” “secudes” her, but that’s a whole separate side tangent) 6. Girl Group AU I LITERALLY FORGOT THIS EVEN EXISTED UNTIL I WAS GOING THROUGH OLD DMs AND IT CAME FLOODING BACK TO ME. Sandy, Pearl and Karen started as a group of high school friends posting videos of themselves singing on YouTube who eventually got big enough to be signed to a major label. Sandy is the lead vocalist and doesn’t really want to BE a musician anymore. Singing was fun when it was just a side hobby she did with two of her friends, but she hates the fame and doesn’t want to pursue music as a career. She’d really rather dedicate her life to science, but she doesn’t want to ruin things for Pearl and Karen Pearl is the youngest (was 15 when they started making videos as opposed to Sandy and Karen who were almost 17) and feels like she’s constantly stuck in Sandy’s shadow. Wants to prove to the world (and her dad) that she’s more than just Sandy’s back up singer. Karen writes all the songs and mostly stays out of the spotlight. Has highkey been sleeping with their manager since day one, despite Sheldon claiming he treats all of his clients equally and doesn’t play favorites. (should be noted that Karen and Sandy were 19ish by the time they were signed and Sheldon would’ve been 20 or 21 since I picture him as an intern who got to surpass his mentor by finding and signing ‘the next big thing’ so like...the Sheldon/Karen relationship is at a healthy age difference don’t get that twisted) But yeah those are the AUs!! And I may think of more!! But I’m back in Sponge mode and want to write more drabbles so feel free to send literally anything into my inbox!! It can be just a little idea of your own, and I’ll also be reblogging starter prompts a few times a week if you’d rather send something from one of those! Feel free to specify an AU! Or not and I’ll pick the one I’m feeling! But thank you very much to everyone who read this monstrosity of a post I owe you my life.

#spongebob broadway #spongebob musical #the spongebob musical #spongebob squarepants musical #spongebob the musical #spongebob squarepants the musical

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strvngcrs · 4 years

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『 adam brody. forty. cis male. he/him. 』 oh heavens, is that DANIEL ABRAMS from FAIR LANE i see roaming around mapleview? minnie may’s always calling them -BROODING & -EVASIVE. i happen to think they’re not that bad! they’re a pretty cool HORROR AUTHOR and every time i’ve seen them, they’ve always been +DEBONAIR & +ELOQUENT. i hope i see them around again!

classically rolls in ridiculously late bc i forgot i had to work last night & then proceeded to sleep in today wooo !! good afternoon ghouls, it’s ya girl maia, finally here to deliver the definition of hot mess with good intentions.

GENERAL

FULL NAME. daniel elijah abrams.

NICKNAMES. dan, danny.

AGE & BIRTHDATE. 40 years old ; may 4, 1980.

GENDER & PRONOUNS. cis male ; he/him.

ORIENTATION. heterosexual.

MARITAL STATUS. estranged.

RELIGION. jewish ( non-practicing ).

OCCUPATION. horror author.

INSPIRATION. bill denbrough ( it ), donnie darko ( donnie darko ), lucas scott ( one tree hill ), stephen king.

PHYSICAL

HAIR COLOUR. black.

EYE COLOUR. dark brown.

BUILD. athletic.

MARKS. freckles scarcely spread across his entire body.

TATTOOS. none.

PIERCINGS. none.

HEIGHT. 5'11".

FACECLAIM. adam brody.

PERSONALITY

ZODIAC. taurus.

ALIGNMENT. chaotic neutral.

HOGWARTS. ravenclaw.

LABEL. the arcane.

POSITIVE TRAITS. cheeky, debonair, driven, eloquent, resilient, solicitous.

NEGATIVE TRAITS. brooding, evasive, inquisitive, sarcastic, stoic, stubborn.

HOBBIES. smokes like a chimney while writing until he forgets what day of the week it is, dabbles in hunting & fishing (thanks @ his dad), labels all crime / thriller genres as ‘predictable’ but continues to watch them, obsesses over & relentlessly criticizes his own work, drinks heavily & passionately plays moonlight sonata or fur elise as if he’s betoven’s disciple.

BACKGROUND

PLACE OF BIRTH. california.

CURRENT RESIDENCE. mapleview, north carolina.

NATIONALITY. american.

ETHNICITY. ashkenazi jewish.

PARENTS. judith miller & mr abrams.

SIBLINGS. mia miller.

BIRTH ORDER. eldest.

CHILDREN. penelope abrams.

EDUCATION. university of california, los angeles; bachelor of arts in english.

LANGUAGES. english, some spanish & french.

HISTORY

EARLY LIFE. born to THE judith miller and some newspaper editor, daniel was raised by the latter and notoriously abandoned by the former. well, not completely abandoned - there’s an old shoebox containing a few letters as proof - but that was the only source of communication in their otherwise absent relationship. while little danny boy didn’t fully understand why he couldn’t see his mother, he sought out an alternative solution by watching her movies. his father wasn’t aware, at first, and dan created this extravagant fantasy of the person he thought she was based on the roles she played. however, once papa abrams found out his son was watching these movies (which were probably not fit for children in the first place lmao oop), he begrudgingly revealed the bitter truth. being forced to come to terms with the fact that his own mother willingly abandoned him with his father, daniel didn’t fully understand what it meant; he couldn’t properly process why. the hurt of absent mother was expressed more out of anger, feeling as though there must have been something wrong with him. there were fewer and fewer letters sent to judith until he gave up altogether and thus, dan’s out of control behavior was born.

TEENAGE FEVER. SUICIDE MENTION TW. he struggled in school. his emotions betrayed him. instead of relishing a happy childhood, daniel found himself pushing everyone away, getting into fights, sneaking out late at night to run around the city streets with his friends and get into all sorts of trouble with them. he couldn’t count on his hands how many times the police picked him up and brought him to his dad’s doorstep. it only got worse once one of his best friends was found dead, written off as a suicide, though it didn’t add up in dan’s eyes and seemed so much more sinister. the young man was nearly deemed to be a lost cause, until he discovered his passion for writing.

language arts or literature was the last thing anyone would ever think to group with daniel abrams. but his english teacher noticed how well he could articulate his thoughts and feelings on paper, and submitted one of his pieces to a writing contest, which earned dan the win and a cash prize. bewildered by a talent he hadn’t even realized was in him, daniel embraced it. he started writing in a journal ( which he kept safely tucked away beneath the mattress of his bed ), documenting every feeling and thought as a way to express his emotions in a more productive manner. this talent earned him a full ride scholarship to ucla with a major in literature and plans of diving into some sort or creative writing career or perhaps becoming an english teacher, to follow in the footsteps of his high school teacher who he came to idolize.

mere days into his freshman year, however, his high school sweetheart showed up in the middle of the night at his dorm with a positive pregnancy test. it was then the chaotic world as he knew it turned a new leaf, revealing a silver lining in the form of their daughter, penelope, who daniel hadn’t a clue, just yet, would save him. and so a shotgun wedding was quickly planned around the pair, both families either completely supportive or in utter disbelief. it was quick, it was cheap(ish), and it was stressful as all heck. but they were young, and in love, and were looking forward to starting a family together, despite it being a little earlier than initially planned.

“ADULT”HOOD. fast forward five years, and they’re signing divorce papers. fortunately, it wasn’t messy. the two had simply grown apart as they matured in their respective ways, and remaining together was only causing a rift to develop between the two. the last thing they wanted, for the sake of their daughter, was built up resentment to tear the little family apart. his wife, who daniel initially thought to be the love of his life, blossomed into an absolute goddess; she was ambitious and knew exactly what she wanted. daniel, on the other hand, was still somewhat caught up in his ‘bad boy’ habits of drinking excessively and his career was still pretty up in the air. the two just didn’t compliment each others’ lifestyles anymore.

daniel moved out but remained in california, settling for a bachelor’s apartment where he was able to have penelope every weekend. during this time, he finally cracked down and worked on finishing a novel he’d started years prior. within a year, he found a publisher who took interest in his grotesque works, and by the time daniel was twenty seven, his first bestseller hit the shelves, changing his life for the better with the ability to provide for his daughter without stress of landing another odd job ever again.

as his fame increased, so did his desire to slink back into the shadows away from the limelight. at first, he enjoyed the wholesome book signings by day and grungy celebratory benders by night. but it grew old pretty fast and he certainly didn’t want to end up as another washed up shmuck. so, on a whim, daniel decided to move out of california completely, removing himself from the toxic lifestyle he’d grown accustomed to and shacking up on a beautiful piece of land in the rocky mountains of north carolina. the serenity and scenery certainly aided in his inspiration, as well as his unacknowledged lowkey addictions slowly being rehabilitated from his bloodstream.

OLD YELLER. now, in his utmost prime at forty years old, he’s written numerous cult classics, a few of which have successful movie adaptations. he was lucky enough to land himself in a second marriage, though.... that one is now deteriorating as well because he literally doesn’t know how to maintain a healthy relationship. he received full custody of his daughter when she was sixteen, under the unfortunate circumstance of her mother’s untimely death. although they’d been separated for nearly twenty years, daniel was still very much affected by the loss, more so empathetically for penelope. he’s still hooked on the drink, though he’s definitely calmed down quite a bit from when he was a young buck. basically a messy, depressy old soul who uses sarcasm to deflect his true feelings.

CONNECTIONS

ESTRANGED WIFE. first marriage was a bust, and the second is turning out to be no better. they haven’t hit rock bottom just yet, in his opinion (which would be finalizing a divorce lmao), and he’s unsure if they should work things out or not but also really.......doesn’t wanna go through the process of another divorce. plus he likes her and deep down adores their bickering. the reason(s) why things started falling apart between them can be discussed of course. lowkey debating on whippin this up as a big official wc but.... if anybody already here would like to snag it, i would 100% mclove it.

COLLABORATORS. literally anyone he’s worked with over the years, whether they be fellow authors, publishers/publicists, journalists, screenplay writers, etc. yeehooo the possibilities are endless !!

FOLLOWERS. anyone hooked on his books, whether devout fans from his early beginnings or people who newly discovered his fictional writings.

FORMER CLASSMATES. could be from high school or university, but he was in california for the better part of his life aka not a mapleview native. former friends to foes & anything in between. dan’s that one kid who spiked the punch bowl at all the dances and years later probably snuck in party favors to snort off the bathroom sink during their high school reunion lmao whew !!

ANYTHING. literally anything. i’m my groggy state of mind on my lack of creativity rn so please, i’m beggin. if daniel can enrich your characters’ lives in any way, shape, or form, hit me up and we’ll hatch a plan.

#———— 🥀 . 𝙳𝙰𝙽𝙸𝙴𝙻 𝙰𝙱𝚁𝙰𝙼𝚂 ╱ DOSSIER .#mv:intro #alcoholism tw #abandonment tw #drug use tw #mommy issues tw #suicide mention tw #i think....that covers it?? if i missed anything pls let me know & ill tag accordingly #this is awful bc i rushed a wee bit buT #HOT DOG am i stupid excited to write with yall

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