Tumgik
#this is a bit less in-depth than i wanted. but i also have a horrible rambling problem and am attempting to be more concise LOL
0809sysblings · 7 months
Text
Amane, indoctrination, and gaslighting
and why voting Amane innocent would be the best course of action
I've been wanting to write a big post on Amane talking about indoctrination and such. Because I see takes sometimes that make it clear the person doesn't really... Get It.
Most of what I'll be explaining comes from my personal experiences growing up.
Additionally, most of what I say when it comes to outcomes (i.e. "If x happens, Amane will do y") will be based on the assumption that realism, not entertainment, is prioritized in the writing and that there are no major holes in our knowledge of what's going on. Theoretically anything could happen since this is a fictional scenario and we don't know everything when it comes to the world, the cases, and the characters. Not to mention my situation was nowhere near as extreme as hers. So although I probably have a better understanding of it than most people, I definitely can't claim that I know what she's gone through.
Personal anecdotes I add to better support my points will be in the small font (this!) since I don't want them to distract from the main text and so that they can be easily skipped for those who may be worried about being triggered. But if anyone needs plain text descriptions, I'll happily provide them!
!! TW for child abuse, religious abuse, and cults !!
I recommend skipping my personal anecdotes if more detailed discussions about these topics are a trigger for you.
At the heart of "good" (read: successful) indoctrination is gaslighting.
Since gaslighting has been one of the many psychology terms completely watered down and distorted by the internet, I will define it just so we're all on the same page!
Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation used to make the victim question their own sanity, sense of reality, or power of reasoning.
Basically, you can't trust yourself. You can't trust your thoughts, your feelings, your interpretations, etc. You become completely reliant on other people (usually specific people who are the ones doing the gaslighting) to figure out what's real/true or not.
Toxic/extremist religious groups like to take gaslighting a step further though. Not only do they make it so you cannot trust yourself to judge what is right or not, they may also teach you that what feels wrong is actually right. You can see where this can start to cause some issues lol.
Anything your gut may tell you that contradicts what the group/cult leaders tell you—"this is wrong!", "this is bad!", "I don't want to do this..."—must be ignored. Because those feelings and thoughts, according to the leaders, are actually the sinful part of you trying to lead the good and faithful part of you astray. They make you question yourself to make sure you never question them.
They will figuratively or literally beat this into you until your first instinct is no longer to listen to your gut and do what it says, but to dismiss it and do what it's telling you not to do. Existing becomes a chronic power struggle between your unconscious mind and your conscious mind. Unfortunately, the fact that you're struggling often then gets used against you as proof that you need to follow their teachings. Because if you're unhappy, then you must be doing something wrong. You just need to have a little more faith, dedicate a little more time to the religion/group, go a little harder into your duties... Only then will you feel better—feel more enlightened.
An integral part in making all this work is isolation. If you don't somehow isolate the members, they may figure out that they're being manipulated and abused.
Now, isolation doesn't always mean purely physical isolation (though Amane is being isolated physically to at least some capacity). Psychological isolation is almost just as powerful. An almost universal psychological isolation tactic used by extremist groups and cults is the "Us vs Them" mentality. We can see this being very prominent with Amane. A lot of things she talks about with regard to the cult involves an Us-vs-Them dynamic. There is "Us", the cult, and "Them", everyone else.
Personally, we were taught that those who weren't believers of our religion were out to get us or will, at the very least, get us hurt/killed somehow. We were told many people wanted us dead just for being believers. You had to be careful and watch out when interacting with non-believers; you couldn't trust them. God was constantly testing you via others, and you had to make sure you stayed faithful.
This in particular is why no matter if you vote guilty or innocent, that itself will not actually do anything to change her beliefs. Voting her guilty will not make her start to feel bad and then question her beliefs. Voting her innocent will not make her listen to us and then question her beliefs. If we make her have any doubt about the cult, that's just proof to her that what we're telling her is wrong and is just another "trial" from God for her to overcome. So, changing her beliefs should not be a factor considered when voting since it's completely irrelevant. Everything can be twisted to support the cult. That's just how it works.
I don't think any amount of punishment will make Amane "come to her senses". I mean... what could we possibly do to her that she hasn't already had to endure? Punishment will likely only escalate things even more. Not to mention that having a bit of a fascination with martyrdom isn't all that uncommon in those who have been religiously abused and indoctrinated. The threat of punishment may only serve to motivate her to double down on her beliefs and behavior. Not to say she wants and likes punishment. It's obvious she's both scared of punishment and wants it to stop. After all, that's most likely the motive behind the murder.
Even prior to Amane's age, I was already fantasizing about being a martyr. A part of me almost wanted to be killed for my religion and community. It was seen as something extremely admirable. The ultimate sacrifice, if you will. We were taught that if given the choice between saving yourself by denying your faith or letting yourself be hurt/killed by standing your ground, you should choose the latter. Of course, I also did not want that to happen at all. It scared me shitless. But we weren't allowed to be scared about that stuff. It was seen as questioning God and the religious authorities, which was completely taboo. So I had no choice but to "want" it.
Isolating Amane is the worst possible thing we could do to her. No one gets better from being isolated, and this goes double for people living in abusive environments. She's been isolated her whole life. The best thing for her would be spending time with the other prisoners without restrictions. The more time she spends around people who have no connection to the cult, the better. Trying to argue with those in cults about why they're wrong and why they are in a cult (because most don't even recognize they're in a cult due to the gaslighting, indoctrination, and stigma) will almost always backfire. The best thing to do is to just be there for them to have someone to interact with who is not a cult member.
The only reason I left the extremist religious community I grew up in was because I made a friend who was not affiliated with it. I don't think I would've been able to see that the conditions I was living in were Not Very Good without that friend. He didn't even really do anything to actively help me. Just learning more about the real world through him was enough to make me start looking closer at my life.
To vote her guilty would be to continue isolating her. Not just physically as the guilty prisoners get restrictions put on them, but it's also an inescapable psychological isolation. Innocent vs Guilty is just another Us vs Them dynamic.
I fear that, if she ends up guilty this trial, she will likely be voted guilty again in trial 3. Her aggression will probably only escalate as she feels herself becoming more and more cornered. And since I know many people are voting her guilty solely to make sure she doesn't hurt Shidou or other prisoners, I can only imagine what the voting will look like for her in trial 3 once she's forced to become even more aggressive to protect herself.
And tbh... I can't imagine that having a prisoner with 3 guilty verdicts will make for all that interesting of a story for them. Not that it would be boring, per se. But having variety would, in my opinion, be the most interesting and entertaining! So, if nothing else I've said has been able to sway those who vote her guilty, then think about the entertainment factor!
Please vote this severely traumatized 12 y/o girl innocent. We can give her so many secret cakes to eat.
106 notes · View notes
stinkysam · 4 months
Text
Trafalgar Law - S/O with a chronic illness.
Tumblr media
Warning : none
Genre : fluff
Synopsis : “Ooh, may I request Trafalgar Law fluff with an s/o with chronic illnesses that result in a lot of disassociation and memory problems? If it's not too tricky or out of your comfort range? Things like. They forget dates and details, both important and unimportant, but they do *try* to remember. They just... can't. Their memory's like a wet sieve. And they tend to run into items that have never moved because they've forgotten that it's there. Or they've disassociated halfway through walking through a space and have completely forgotten that they have a body, and need to dodge items that they know are there.” - anon
Reader : gender neutral (you/yours)
Tumblr media
Law, even though it's not in his medical range, has studied the field of chronic illness and knew what to expect when you told him about it.
He's also a very patient man, despite Luffy wearing it thin. But lucky for him you're not Luffy, completely naive and unpredictable.
He doesn't mind you forgetting dates, he knows you're not doing it on purpose. Even if they're important. He'll remind you of the important ones without judging you. Same thing if you forget names, faces, places.
He's not big on dates either. Except for Cora's death and the first time he met each member of his crew. And if he doesn't remember the date exactly he remembers how the day went.
So you won't have to worry about the 1st week & month anniversary of your relationship. But he'll remind you for the first year anniversary and the following ones but that's all.
He doesn't care if you forget which one of you asked the other on a date, or other details. He'll remember it and will remind you if you want to.
He's a bit amused by you walking into things though. As long as you don't get hurt. Sometimes, when you go too fast he will make you move with his devil fruit so you don't hit anything too hard. It makes him think of cats that are almost blind and hit things.
He has tried moving things around in the Polar Tang so they would be less in the way but it didn't change anything. You still walked into walls and doors, it just made it worse for a short period of time.
With your consent, he talked about it to the members of the crew so they wouldn't get hurt if you forgot their birthday or even their name.
They're all very patient and understanding and it even relaxed them a little bit. Not that it wasn't okay to forget someone's birthday, but now it felt less stressful.
He'll never make you feel insecure about it because he knows illnesses are hard to live with. Even if they're not physical.
He's a bit worried about your dissociation, though, and tries to find ways to help you with it. Like keeping a consistent sleep schedule despite his horrible one. Making you eat nutritious food -but he does that with everyone-, making you exercise. Or pet Bepo while smelling different essential oils.
He even makes you write a journal so you can help yourself remember what you did and keep track of things.
He always makes you sit when you start dissociating, not wanting you to walk overboard accidentally or open the main doors while the Polar Tang is in the depth of the sea.
You were sitting on the floor calmly, Bepo placed between your legs as you caressed his head. He's more relaxed than you, taking it as a massage while you try to identify what you're smelling but your stare is almost empty, feeling it hard to connect with your thoughts.
Law is here too, sitting next to you, reading and talking with Bepo. He doesn't care how long it takes for you to come back. Once again, he's patient and aware it's harder for you than for him.
224 notes · View notes
exitpursuedbyavulcan · 8 months
Text
What is Broken (Aemond Targaryen x Pregnant Wife!Reader) SNEAK PEEK
Tumblr media
The war, the "Dance of the Dragons," as they have come to call it, is over. And yet, you are not celebrating. You have just learned that your husband, Prince Aemond, spent the last months of the war with another woman in his bed. Not only that, but his mistress is pregnant. Just like you...
Pairing: Aemond Targaryen x fem!reader (third person, no use of Y/N), side Aemond Targaryen x Alys Rivers
Warnings: Angst, pregnancy and related symptoms, infidelity, maybe smut in the future idk
Author's note: Ok well since Studious came out of me trying to power through my writer's block, hopefully this'll not only be as good, but also work as well for kicking writer's block's ass. Idk how long it's gonna be. It's based on a convo I had with the Aemond AI (made by @foxyanon ) on a day when I just didn't feel like being happy at all. Coming soon (I hope)!
What is Broken Sneak Peek
It was a lovely night in King’s Landing.
There was not a cloud to be seen for miles, and the stars were bright and twinkling. The waters of Blackwater Bay were calm and reflected the full moon as clearly as a freshly polished mirror. Even the wind seemed in a pleasant mood, carrying the sweet scent of spring on its back as it drifted lazily through the windows of the Red Keep.
Every bit of it grated on her heart like a whetstone across dull steel.
The worst night of one’s life should not be so lovely, she thought. It should be terrible. With storms and an angry sea, and perhaps even a raging fire somewhere in the distance.
If the night had been so, she would not have seen it when, only a few moments ago, a massive winged form landed in the fields just outside the city with a lowing wail, the last person she wanted to see strapped to its back. Thankfully, Aemond was far enough away that she could not make him out against the mass of his mount.
The people would cheer him in the streets as he rode toward the castle. The victorious Prince, returning after long months at war, having not only ended the war itself but avenged the deaths of his sister, brother, and his little nieces and nephews.
Daemon Targaryen and his dragon had perished above the God’s Eye, the waters below boiling when their bodies fell into its depths.
With the Rogue Prince gone, the war was swiftly over. Rhaenyra was killed, her last remaining son taken as King Aegon’s ward, and the royal host returned to King’s Landing victorious. Even Cregan Stark had agreed to halt his advance South, redirecting to Harrenhal for peace talks.
Harrenhal. A cursed place, now to be the site of great diplomacy.
Even thinking about the horrible castle was enough to turn her stomach.
A letter detailing exactly what had occurred within those melted stone halls during the war, written by the late Prince Daemon himself, sat on her vanity. A final act of retribution against his soon-to-be killer.
She knew that her husband was only returning home because of the letter.
My dear Princess,
Despite the conflict between our sides of the family, I have always thought you a rather sweet girl. Therefore, it is with the deepest regret that I must now shoulder the burden of informing you of your beloved husband’s improper conduct during this awful conflict…
A pang of nausea shot through her stomach as she remembered the words.
A mistress… some Strong bastard… called Alys, my spies tell me… every night, without fail… from the very first week… another bastard babe in the whore’s witchly womb…
There was a pounding from within her, soft thumps and kicks as the life inside her own womb became unsettled by its mother’s roiling emotions. She laid a hand over her belly, whispering soothing words she did not believe to try and calm it – and herself.
Once, she would never have believed Daemon’s stories. But then word came that, after the final battle, Aemond returned to Harrenhal for less than an hour before he again mounted Vhagar and flew for King’s Landing. It was not like Aemond to make such swift decisions. Nor did it strike her as the action of an innocent man.
When she called for Ser Willis Fell, her heart had been filled with hope that the new Lord Commander of the Kingsguard would dispel her worries. That she had only allowed herself to consider the possibility of Aemond’s infidelity because her mind was addled by her delicate condition.
“My princess, I cannot, in good conscience, tell you a lie…”
She had screamed then. And cried. And possibly thrown things at the Kingsguard, but she couldn’t entirely remember.
All she could remember was how Aemond kissed her on the day he left for Harrenhal. Deeply and passionately. Until she could feel his love for her as clearly as her own heartbeat. Then he knelt before her and placed a single, tender kiss to her belly, to where they had only just learned that their babe grew.
Less than a moon’s turn later, he had taken another woman to his bed, and seeded her, too.
282 notes · View notes
Text
Idk if this is going to make any sense, but I always feel like there's something missing when I read thoughts about sskk and it really is the impact Kyouka has on them.
Like, a lot of it is "look at the impact Atsushi and Akutagawa have on each other" and "they are so similar at their cores" which is true! And essential for any bsd partner dynamic! But Kyouka also has commonalities - she has Atsushi's general wonder, simple wants and joys, and desire to be helpful and kind, but also Akutagawa's laser focused objectivity, initial lack of questioning orders, and straightforward ruthlessness when required.
But a lot of the external influence on sskk I see mentioned is Dazai and Chuuya's... which I get, because they're the previous double black, but also Chuuya is very minorly involved by proxy only, and while Dazai undeniably is at the heart of sskk conflict (and it's good to analyze in depth!!!), I feel it's understated how much it was actually Kyouka who kickstarted the development between them - Atsushi was brand-new to the Agency, but saving Kyouka cemented his mindset of proving his worth and also gave him someone to look out for - his position became less fragile from that point on and more permanent. Her mix of kindness and darkness also forces Atsushi in the Guild arc to reassess the idea that people are either "good" or "bad". (He's working on this still, but his judgements are becoming much more nuanced than at the beginning.) And as for Akutagawa... I have a lot of thoughts on their dynamic and how I really don't think there's a whole lot of bad blood there anymore after my all-time favourite scene where they fight in Cannibalism arc - but all I will say is that he legitimately thought what he was doing would make her strong enough to survive, and both Kyouka and Atsushi telling him this is wrong, that people can't live being beaten down like that forces him to reassess his own situation in the Hawthorne and Mitchell fight. (He still has a ways to go, but I seriously hope he eventually realizes that his treatment by Dazai was horribly unnecessary and cruel.)
But what's great is that Atsushi and Akutagawa influence her development too! I don't even need to get into Atsushi's: he believes in her potential and sees her as the young girl she is - not a weapon but a person. She starts off pretty much attached to him and only him, but as time goes on, she starts to adopt a more positive mindset and becomes more confident making decisions as a result of his faith in her. With Akutagawa, she is, like Atsushi, forced to reassess others, especially after he tells her he's glad for her having found that will to live. Kyouka is unable to continue fighting him after that, and I get the sense she saw him as a person there, instead of only the man who harmed her. I also find it really interesting that she has no shame or concern about her mindset aligning much more closely with his, to the point where she'll work with him if necessary.
This is a bit of a mess but really it's one long-winded ramble on how I loved these three working together in Dead Apple and would love to see them working and fighting alongside each other again. I know, I know, this is probably not going to happen because it's supposed to be about sskk as a duo but consider:
They are a trio in my heart.
Tumblr media
543 notes · View notes
eluxcastar · 10 months
Note
May I request Arlecchino finding her lover collapsed on the floor in tears from a fever they are suffering from and then taking care of them?
Arlecchino and her poor sick s/o
── ୨୧:arlecchino x reader
୨୧﹑synopsis :: a terrible fever leaves you effectively bedridden for days
୨୧﹑content :: gn reader, mentions reader vomiting but does not happen within it, the reader is a massive simp, oh and also they're married because I said so
୨୧﹑words :: 2.6k
I haven't abandoned you honeys I'm just working on a time-consuming Arlecchino request that's like 8k words long ❤️ so here's a little something to tide you over for a bit in light of the newest teaser from mihoyo
Tumblr media
You have spent three days curled up in your bed with a temperature so bad Arlecchino almost considered taking you to Dottore to sort it out, but you were more than happy to wait it out instead.
Those three days had been spent swiftly losing any food you tried to eat and barely keeping down the water you forced yourself to drink so that you wouldn't get dehydrated with how much the heat made you sweat.
Now that days have passed, your throat hurts, and you curse your gag reflex. You don't even want to drink water, and the dizziness that prevents you from getting up has hardly subsided. You've slept through most of it, yet you can't bear to spend another minute glued to your bed, tossing and turning amidst your covers. They're thoroughly a mess, no thanks to hours of indecision as you become hot under them and cold without them for too long.
It's a frustrating thing to be confronted with your weakness.
There is truly nothing worse. This time last week, you would've been by your lovely Arlecchino's side, helping her with her work as she managed the less enjoyable affairs for the House of Hearth. It's always nice to have someone with you to curb your boredom when you have to do menial work.
But since you woke up in the middle of the night overwhelmed by dizziness so horrible you couldn't figure out which way was left, you have been stuck here where you cannot reach her for much of the day. She insisted she should remain with you, but you weren't eager to take up more of her precious time for no reason other than your conscience. You know she would be happy to. You just don't want to trouble her.
While she's gone, you should remember to do the things she made you promise to do: get lots of rest, drink water, don't push yourself.
By what is basically the force of fate, you have been good at resting and not pushing yourself. It's the water you're struggling with. You tried to force yourself to half something earlier, using whatever surface was available to support yourself, but you found yourself with an upset stomach and an awful lingering feeling in your throat.
Your second trip to the kitchen for a glass of water is equally unsuccessful.
She asked only three things of you, and even that is out of your depth? You must be pathetic. Soon, Arlecchino will return home, and she will see the glaring problem that you're dehydrated and be disappointed that you couldn't even listen to her requests.
The floor is the most comfortable spot to sit or kneel awkwardly on your hands and knees after quickly lowering yourself to the floor when you are hit with a dizzy spell to avoid hitting it at a high speed once you inevitably fall over.
Is sickness making you a wreck? Were you always this quick to give up? You never feel this uneasy. Your fever must be messing with your head and making you overemotional, but you feel so useless, whatever the reason. Suddenly you understand those people forced to retire from their work only to become restless and idle all day from an overwhelming absence in their life, if only for a few days.
It hurts, mentally mostly, but the physical pain of it all is hardly helping. Something about fevers is so draining to your body.
Water. You'd just like to drink some water. Is that too much to ask? Surely not.
Water…on the floor underneath you. It's only a drop, but you never even made it to the fridge. Where could it have come from? You place your finger on it, confirming it is most definitely not a product of your fever-driven imagination as it feels very real. Another drop lands on the back of your hand, then on the floor in quick succession, too quick for anything like a hole in the ceiling. Holes in the ceiling can't pass water through your head, either.
Tears? You're not crying-- you reach up to feel your cheek. Oh, you are. You are crying.
When did that happen? You never cry, not in good health anyway. It's completely unlike you. Though not in good health, maybe it's not so unthinkable. Maybe you are weak like this, even mentally. You didn't think a little sickness could bring you down very much; evidently, you were wrong.
You first settle back on your kneels, wiping your eyes clean of the tears that started and won't stop coming, especially now that you realise it. Like a wound that doesn't hurt until you look at it and realise how bad it looks, it hits you all at once that you really are quite miserable in this state. Water is too hard for you to get. Really? Is that how far you've fallen?
This powerless feeling is horrible, like a weakness eating at your bones every moment you spend sick. Conclusively, you really hate being sick.
You must not have noticed the sound of the door opening, possibly because you were distracted by your condition and its inhibition of your simple desire to drink a glass of water so that you could tell Arlecchino that you did it. Maybe that was supposed to prove to her you were getting better or something. You obviously weren't, but it feels nice to lie to yourself sometimes and try to convince yourself that you won't be bearing with this sickness for very long.
On the other hand, you certainly do notice the footsteps encroaching on you and your pathetic state. It doesn't matter who's there. You don't want anyone to see you this way. Not Arlecchino and not any fatuu she may have sent to check on you. Not that you're on the floor, and most definitely not that the reason you're down there is because you're crying. It would be too shameful to handle ever publicly showing your face again. You scramble to try and get back on your feet and wipe your tears, but it only proves your weakness to you as you get up so fast you make yourself dizzy again and stumble to find something to hold onto before you fall again.
The only reason you don't end up flat on your ass is because Arlecchino grabs you by your shoulders and holds you close, so close you feel her poor jacket soak up your tears. You want to pull away so you don't wet her clothes, but you can't. She is your only anchor right now. If you do that, she'll really know you're crying. Of course, she is already aware that you are, but if you at least stay with your face buried in the fur of her overcoat, you don't have to acknowledge that she knows.
Evidently, bed is the best place for you right now, and you are promptly returned there so that you can lay back and rest.
"I didn't even realise I was crying, swear!" Your attempts to save yourself are pointless, as she never cared whether you were crying or not in the first place. It's natural to cry, even if she doesn't want to see you upset.
"It's alright. Covers on or off?" There is a certain gentleness in her voice that makes you look away in embarrassment, though it is undeniably attractive that a hot woman would take care of you while you're sick. The 'in health' part is really sexy too, but the sickness part stirs butterflies in your stomach...
"Off," you respond.
It’s even hotter you get to be married to that woman.
She places a kiss on your forehead, as gentle as the rest of her actions, a degree of care present that she does not usually impart. She is not heartless and cold toward you, but this side of her is a rare one reserved for the moments when you feel especially precious. Sickness, injury...
It is a rarity that you treasure because it means a lot to you.
"I just got overwhelmed I guess." You can't think of a way to explain it to her that actually makes some degree of sense. Any explanation you think of sounds stupid to your brain and probably hers. "I'm fine, I promise."
"I know, I know. Glass of water, and something to eat small enough it won't upset your stomach." Her thumb brushing over your forehead is enough to settle those rampant emotions of yours, though still teary-eyed and moody.
"Just give me a second and I can do it." Again with your insistence to not be helped, you're just spouting off lies at this point, fooling yourself but not her.
She laughs at your stubbornness. "No you can't." She says that so matter-of-factly you can't even be bothered to fight as the words die in your throat at how amused she seems. It's one of your endearing traits, you like to think. The slight smile she walks off with would certainly support that delusion.
You're probably fooling yourself about that part too, but something about her collectedness while your brain is all scrambled up and chaotic calms you, and you fish around the bed for the coat she had discarded and laid out at your feet before she left. It's nice and heavy but not too warm when laid across you so haphazardly that it overheats you. The fur around the collar is uncomfortably wet in one spot.
However could that have happened? Sure hope someone didn't get their tears all over it.
What's best is that it smells like her, covered in her scent from top to bottom, and now you are too. It's like getting a warm hug from your wife in the absence of a hug or your wife
Ok maybe it's impossible to marry you and not know that you're really stubborn when you want to be.
"I'll stay with you like this for the entire week if that's what you want. I don't mind if I catch whatever you managed to get." Her words are so sweet that you get those butterflies again. Could you really handle a week with her like this? Probably not. You might just drop dead, but if nothing else, you'd be dying happy.
"I would definitely mind that." You laugh back, trying to match her responses and diffuse the idea you might want her gone.
"What? Don't want to take care of me?" She's just teasing, but her expression doesn't give that away at a glance.
"Didn't say that!"
You can't help feeling happy. You like this as your medicine a lot, and it has nothing to do with your face being this close to her chest and everything to do with her warmth and her words like everything is normal, and you're both just messing around. If that were the truth, it might be really nice too, but it makes being sick a hell of a lot more enjoyable.
It can't be more than a minute or two before she returns with a glass of water and some dry biscuits. The only two things that you can keep down seem like heaven in her hands despite how bland both of them are. It feels nice to finally be hydrated, and it feels great to have something in your stomach aside from an empty feeling.
Arlecchino takes the time as an opportunity to settle into bed beside you.
As you set the glass of water down on the floor beside your bed, you turn back over to squirm your way into her waiting arms, now receiving a warm hug from your wife in the presence of both a hug and your wife.
You are comfortable with a bit of pillow shifting, some wriggling into place and a slight repositioning of your head. You are not smothered by her and can breathe while remaining in her arms. Your head is not in a position where your neck hurts, and your legs are comfortably intertwined with hers. Dreams do come true, and on that note, you won't be moving from this position for the next few hours if you can help it.
"You can keep the coat if you want. I'll wash it once you're better." Her voice is low, trying not to be too loud when you are so close but audible.
You would shake your head but don't dare, only mumbling back to her. "You need it for work tomorrow."
"I'll take a day off." She says it so off-handedly it sounds suspiciously normal for a moment before the shock of it hits you.
Your eyes open, and you tilt your head up just enough to see her face, completely serious. "Are you sure? You'll have a lot to do--"
She makes a face like she is thinking, though it is an act to emphasise what she says next. "I'll use it to manage files from the House of Hearth if it would make you feel better about getting to steal all my attention at home."
"Accepted." Evidently, you are far too easy to bargain with.
She laughs to herself nonetheless, hand stroking your back. "I don't want to leave for work only to come home to you crying again."
You go dead silent and look away again. "...Sorry."
"I didn't mean it in that way." She tries to reassure you with those words, and it works a little but doesn't take away from your embarrassment. Are you going to remember that for the next five years wondering if she's judging you for it knowing damn well she's not and probably doesn't remember it? Hopefully not. "It worried me, that's all. I want to be here if you need me."
Ok maybe that's really hot too.
"Well, if you're sure, then I'm not going to tell you no." You wouldn't stop her anyway because, secretly, you would really like for her to stay with you. You wanted that from the start and just couldn't swallow your pride to admit it.
The small chuckle she lets out hearing that tells you that she is very aware of that fact. Maybe it's hard to marry you and not know that.
Ok maybe it's impossible to marry you and not know that you're really stubborn when you want to be.
"I'll stay with you like this for the entire week if that's what you want. I don't mind if I catch whatever you managed to get." Her words are so sweet that you get those butterflies again. Could you really handle a week with her like this? Probably not. You might just drop dead, but if nothing else, you'd be dying happy.
"I would definitely mind that." You laugh back, trying to match her responses and diffuse the idea you might want her gone.
"What? Don't want to take care of me?" She's just teasing, but her expression doesn't give that away at a glance.
"Didn't say that!"
You can't help feeling happy. You like this as your medicine a lot, and it has nothing to do with your face being this close to her chest and everything to do with her warmth and her words like everything is normal, and you're both just messing around. If that were the truth, it might be really nice too, but it makes being sick a hell of a lot more enjoyable.
Tumblr media
225 notes · View notes
sprout-fics · 1 year
Note
Hi! I’m not sure if requests are open (genuine apologies if they’re not, feel free to ignore me!!) but I was wondering how König might react to an S/O with a lot of chronic pain? I know that’s kind of a weird thing to ask,, I just adore how you write him (dark König too !!) and I suffer with horrible chronic pain, particularly in my back, legs and shoulders. I’m essentially in pain 24/7 and its yucky but your version of König is so lovely I’d be honored to see how you think he’d feel about it or comfort them!!
Tumblr media
Affliction. Affection.
(König x GN! Reader)
Call of Duty Masterlist
Rating: General Word count: 1.6k Tags: Sickfic, Fluff, Domesticity, Established Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, Cuddling, Caretaking, Love Languages, Acts of Service A/N: (This touched my heart, anon. I also deal with chronic pain, thought mine is much less consistent than yours. It's something I think about a lot in terms of caring partners and love languages. So I wrote a bit about how I'd want to be comforted on a particular bad pain day, in hopes maybe you'd be able to relate as well. I hope you enjoyed ❤️)
Tumblr media
It’s the pain that rouses you from sleep. 
You don’t even realize that’s what it is at first, woken more by your whining, uncomfortable whimpers than the twisting, taut sensation of your muscles pulled too tight. A bowstring drawn back, threatening to snap. The pain extends outwards, like fissures it delves deep into you, letting you gaze into the depths where the thorny weight of hurt bubbles upwards along your hips, your spine, your legs. 
The bed is empty aside from you, you realize, when you reach for him. Normally you’d be displeased that he’d leave you. Now, however, you can’t summon the power to care, instead hauling the blankets warm and thick around you. You burrow into them, cocooning yourself as if the layers can insulate you from the hurt that extends ever outwards. Knees up to your chest, face hidden underneath the sheets you whimper at the pain, vulgar, fetid as it churns in your stomach with the tell-tale murmur of nausea. 
König is somewhere beyond you, fumbling in the kitchen. You hear the clank and clatter of pans and cupboards in the small space you two share. His gangly limbs don’t fit the scale of it, constantly misjudging his reach, his height as he bangs or bumps something in the way. It’s an adorable feature to the soldier, usually allowed all the space he needs within the field of battle to stretch, tower to his full potential like the leviathan he is.
There’s a clatter, followed by a hushed, hissed curse as König scrambles to right whatever it is he’s accidentally touched. Yet it’s followed by silence when he spares a glance back at the open door of the bedroom, as if making sure he hasn’t disturbed you. 
You don’t bother to look up, focusing instead on your breathing, trying to quell the sharp ache that rises fiercely inside you with every heartbeat. In through your nose, holding, then releasing and trapping the warmth of it below your covers. You can feel the blood rushing in your ears, unable to stop a stifled groan of pain as the ache washes over you once more, twisting, pulling, hurting.
König’s footsteps draw near, his quest in the kitchen now abandoned as he takes in your curled form burrowed deeply within the messy covers. You hardly notice, entire form rigid with discomfort as you try to focus on something, anything other than the horrible, sickening churn inside you. 
“Liebling?” König asks after a minute of silence, wordlessly watching you stiffen and shudder in the sheets. When you don’t answer, however, he draws closer, at last crouching beside you. Even at this position you still have to look up at him when he delicately peels the sheets away from your face, baring you to him. 
“Liebling, what’s wrong?” He asks, and the sound of his voice alone melts some of the hurt inside you. His eyes are gentle, soft, when they look down at you, brow knotted as he takes in the distress that washes over your face with the next wave of pain. 
“H-hurts.” You manage, voice a touch raw with both discomfort and the bleariness of sleep. 
König breathes, lets out a held breath at your response. Then your vision darkens for a moment as his hand reaches out to the space between you, settles at last over your face, where it cups your cheek in a tender caress. You can’t help the little whine that escapes you at that, as you nuzzle into his palm.
“I-I’m okay.” You tell him after a few deep breaths. “Just a bad pain day. I’ll be okay.”
Yet when you look up after scrunching your eyes König’s face remains unchanged, eyes shiny with anxiety, wide with worry as he gazes at you. 
“How bad?” He asks, and you blink at the timidness of his voice, unsure and searching for the answer in your gaze. Then, quieter, he ventures: “You…you’ll be okay?”
It’s the uneasiness there that loosens your limbs in surprise, allowing that ache inside you to dull even for a few moments. There’s an almost boyish heartache to his gaze, distressed and a touch inconsolable to the twisting grimace across your face. It’s as if he almost doesn’t believe you when you try to reassure him, plagued relentlessly by the thought of your pain as if it were his own. 
You feel your gaze soften upon his own, feel the sharp, ragged corners of you dull to fit into the soft confines of his tender heart. 
“I’ll be okay, I promise.” You murmur to him, and that at last seems to draw the veil of melancholy back from his expression. König’s thumb grazes across your cheek, scraping against your too warm skin. 
“Can I do anything?” He asks gently, entreating as if he’s offering himself to the altar of you. “Food? Medicine? H-Heizkis-...what is the world in English…” You watch as his face takes on a new expression, perplexed and vaguely annoyed. It draws a smile from you, upturning your lips even as you grimace. 
“...Heating pad?” You offer helpfully, and König’s eyes brighten as he nods in recognition. 
“Ja.” He replies quickly, sitting up a little taller, expectant and enthusiastic in his efforts to help. 
“Mm.” You murmur, tucking your face into his hand so your lips graze the inside of his palm. He shivers. 
“A heating pad would be nice, actually.” You return. “And some painkillers. Though I think I’m a little too nauseous for food.”
König’s brow draws again at that. 
“You should have something, vöglein.” He murmurs gently. “Your stomach will hurt if you do not eat.”
“It hurts already.” You whine, but that doesn’t seem to deter him, expression unbudging. “...Maybe just some crackers?”
König nods, resolute now in his mission, ever the soldier. Yet just as he’s about to draw away he pauses, turns his eyes back to you. 
“...I need my hand, liebling.” He tries gently, but your fingers only encircle his too large wrist instead with a little noise of protest. “...Bitte?”
You turn your watery gaze up to him, eyes wet with pain and the remnants of sleep. 
“You’ll come back?” You ask, and you feel like a child, clinging to the mere comfort of his touch. 
König melts.
“Of course.” He murmurs, and the shadow of him dwarfs you as he draws near, allows his lips to graze across your brow in a tender, lingering kiss. “Soon.”
You release him then, with a small sniffle, allow him to retreat so you can again curl into the mess of blankets around you. His footsteps fade, and you try to focus not on the pain but the sound of his movements, the remaining echo of his voice that soothes at the tender heart of you. 
It feels like he’s been gone forever by the time he at last returns, again fumbling on the other side of the bed until there’s a telltale click of a heating pad turning on. You reach for it automatically, only to find your outstretched arm caught in his grasp. A confused, bedraggled noise is torn from you when König gently pulls you from your nest of tangled sheets. Yet suddenly there’s arms around you, lifting you, moving you as the bed shifts under his weight. 
He settles at last behind you, his back braced against the headboard, legs sprawled on either side of you as you’re propped up against his chest. The sudden cold of the room leaves goosebumps trailing along your arms. Yet before you can protest there’s a hand gripping yours, allowing it to settle around a glass of water, the other depositing two tiny capsules into your upturned palm. 
His touch follows yours as you take the medicine, swallow the water in one go. You think that’s enough with the way König rumbles down at you, like the sound of wind through a fir forest, pulling at the trees. Yet when you try to shift, tuck your head into his chest you find yourself instead being directed towards a single slice of warm bread, the steam curling up and filling your nose. 
The putrid pull of nausea threatens your stomach, but you eat anyways, letting warmth curl across your tongue until the bread is gone. It’s then, only then, that you allow yourself to go fully limp in König’s arms, sinking into his heat and trying to burrow into the dip of his ribcage. You hardly hear him as he moves once more, one arm securely fastened around your waist as he slides downwards. The touch flares the hurt there, and when you whine his lips settle across your shoulder in an apology, muttering in tender German until he at last allows you both onto your sides, draws you back into him. 
The heating pad appears a moment later, pressed against your front and you sigh at the blessed heat there, drawing the pain from you like siphoning poison from your limbs. As you settle you feel him reach, draw the covers over your form once more.
“Better?” He asks after several moments of blissful silence, where the world softens at the edges and allows you to sink into momentary relief. 
“Much.” You reply simply, voice groggy as drowsiness pulls at you once more. Then, after a moment. “Thank you, König. Danke schön.”
König hums, and the sound echoes in his chest like the creak of elder trees atop foggy mountains. His arms fold around you, nose bumping against your shoulder as he too, buries himself in the relief of you. 
“The pain will get better.” He murmurs there, voice a little helpless at the mere touch of you. “I’ll be here until it does, and I’ll be here after too, meine Liebe.”
The pain in your limbs feels dulled by the golden, yielding touch of him, here to hold you away from the bitter wash of pain within the sweetness of his embrace. 
Tumblr media
546 notes · View notes
mtkay13 · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media
Qi Ye cast poster!!
This had started as a sketch, waaay back as I was still reading Qi Ye. The original is pretty different from this (I considered adding it in the post but I actually don't like it anymore haha), but the plan was already to make this big spread with most of the -more or less- important cast.
I will add here some thoughts about the whole piece, and I guess, Qi Ye itself. My main goal was probably to express my deep and intense feelings for Qi Ye, its grandness, and its awesome cast-- and along with that, flesh out my mental image of each of them, their personality, their style. Here is a table with the names, so we know who is whom, and so I can add some details about my perspective on them and their design.
Tumblr media
Jing Beiyuan has always come quite naturally. I just go for the "prettiest face" I ever came with in terms of : my own taste, and the features I find the most delicate. I'd argue he's the easiest character to draw for me across both QY and TYK. On this image, he's probably around 16 or 17. I find his expressions to be very fun to work on in general.
Ping An is also quite an easy character to draw, just for how specific Priest is when describing him.
Wu Xi's design is mainly inspired by a discussion with my friend Hanya, who talked about how, in SHL, Wu Xi more resembled a northern shaman than a southern shaman. It made me want to explore the designs and characteristics a bit more, and come up with more colourful fabrics, patterns, and darker skin color. Same goes for Ashinlae and Nuahar, to have them matching Wu Xi's aesthetic.
Ming Hua was included in this just because of the mess the mention of his name caused in the story. The two jealousy tantrums are just so delightful!!
Su Qingluan was made to resemble Jing Beiyuan, of course. What I wanted to reflect in her face was her frustration, mainly.
Ji Xiang and Hua Yue... Well. Nothing particular about their design either, but they had to be there. Of course, of course they had to be there.
Finally, an opportunity to draw Zishu with his fan and henchmen! Not mad that he kinda looks like a villain, here.
Lu Yu!! I drew him with an Ashinlae mask, since he disguises himself as Ashinlae. I included him because he matters a lot in my headcanons about Siji Manor. (it isn't specified, in Qi Ye, whether or not he's actually part of the manor, but I like to consider that he is for various reason that I may detail if I ever make a Siji Manor post)
I'll skip Jiang Xue and Liang Jiuxiao because their designs are steady for me, now.
I hesitated a lot for Helian Pei's pose, but ended up going for this one (looking bored, out of his depth, lost in the distance with his birds around him). I considered showing him with a bird in his hands, but I guess that's not the main vibe I get from him. And then, well, golden, flashy clothing, suited for an emperor.
Helian Zhao had to be in a showy armor, and I hated making it because it's so much work, haha. I took inspiration from an armor in NiF. I'm quite happy with how he came out in terms of both vibe and showiness.
I tried going full out on Helian Qi. Making him the villain that Qi Ye deserved. Dark, showy, elegant and horrible.
Helian Yi is also pretty solid for me, by now.
About the illustration itself, the main challenge was definitely to make a nice colour palette while still differenciating all the characters. I wanted to go with something intense, eerie, that could also complement the main tones I would go for (= red, purple, blue and green). I'm quite happy with how the golden tones, along with the green and reddish lights, make the whole thing come together. I struggled a little bit with the composition at first, but once I got the flow and the main figures down, it just happened quite easily. Anyway, I'm quite proud of this, and hope it conveys the love and admiration I have for Qi Ye well.
418 notes · View notes
gacha-incels · 2 months
Note
Been boycotting limbus but it's a bit disheartening seeing everyone continue around me with this passing intl women's day. I don't know how to convince my friends to stop without getting into an argument because they're all knee deep into these games. But my real question was.. why? These people are boycotting other products for other things, why are they so adamant with sticking on this when it's proven to have harmed so many people in the small team that made it?
Had a discussion with one who is boycotting and I feel like that "political correctness" seeps into the themes of the game, actually, despite how people tout it as the ultimate anti capitalist game; The City is suffering, workers gruel and die at the whims of corporate overlords, people struggle to find housing, and whatever the fuck Carmen's doing in the light, while it could help people survive longer, is just giving everyone guns ignoring the power structures underneath. It's very strange to me now there's.. no suggestion of uprooting the system at all in the games. No true strikes or protests or even any mentions of unions as far as I know. There's no effort to change what is given
[outside of the seed of light project, which 1. famously Didn't Work and 2. having everyone manifest ego is still just giving everyone guns and going "now don't shoot each other!"],
which is very strange and kind of sad? Like sure maybe an arbiter or something would come and tear it down but surely people would come up with countermeasures? People are really good at adapting around things out of desperation, and surely at least an effort would be mentioned
And then my friend, she suggested something; without project moon's suffering, there would be no project moon. Without the city, project moon can't make games. To end the hell that the characters are in and truly resolve the city's hypercapitalist dystopia, they must stop making money off of them. But they don't want to. They definitely DO want to make more games, noted by the interviews which mention future game concepts such as the distortion detective visual novel. But in order to do so, they must keep the current games "clean" and consistent in their suffering to perpetuate conflict. There is some commentary about capitalism to be had; but it feels more like a "oh, look, people are dying, this is so sad" layer of paint on it at this point rather than something more in depth and meaningful. And I think in enforcing this sort of "we can't fix the system in any meaningful way, let's just live our lives instead and hope something better happens" mindset, it reflects into the players. Kind of ironic how the anti capitalism game must sustain its own horrible systems internally so the owners of the series can: make more money through a very predatory money making system, no less!
Limbus fans don't give a fuck about feminism in kr, they think its a system they cant help fixing so they just play the game as they please and any attempt to disuade them is met with a "stop ruining my fun!!" And "who cares?" The worst ones are the ones who KNOW their money is being funneled into stupid misogynistic shit but don't care! It's insane! I've never seen this level of apathy towards a serious issue before!
Sigh. I hope this ramble is coherent. If I missed talking about something or if you want me to talk more I'm game. Project moon's characters are some of my favorites but you have to admit the themes are surface level shit at some point, especially in later installments of their games. So tired but I'd figure I'd share my thoughts somehow. Take care account admin, youre doing gods work
yeah regarding your first point about fans that keep playing, back in August there was a discussion on this blog here regarding contemporary fandom “culture”- how it makes dropping a piece of media hard for some people and why they feel so quick to defend it. the nature of gacha is also that it gets you into the habit of doing “dailies” which makes them harder to drop, this is not even mentioning sunk cost fallacy. I’ve seen a recent post on the FGO subreddit asking why people still play the game and the top posts by a longshot were ones saying only because they spent so much time and money on it. For a lot of people (even people who think themselves progressives) misogyny is a non-issue as well so they will not take the situation in South Korea that seriously to begin with. This is in addition to it happening to “other” or “foreign” women in the eyes of the western fan. There is also an aggressive “fuck you, I’ve got mine” attitude some of the fans who want to keep playing have in regards to these women. It’s disturbing to watch happen but unfortunately not uncommon. I find some of the worst of it, in this situation specifically, is when westerners try to tell Korean women (who are boycotting and spreading information) that they are the ones spreading misinfo, or there’s no reason for them to boycott, how it’s not that bad for them, how PM actually didn’t do anything wrong, “both sides” are crazy and wrong, “let people enjoy things”, shit like that. like doesn’t it raise any flags for you that the people most affected by PM’s actions, Korean women, deleted entire accounts of fanart, took back fanmade items from PM’s cafe, started a boycott of LC and made posts in english to try and get the word out to international fans? you must think they’re idiots if you believe this is all some misunderstanding and vellmori quit of her own free will. Come on. imo it’s impossible to make any meaningful statement critiquing capitalism when you’re writing it in a game that uses one of the most exploitive types of gambling mechanics. I hope I don’t have to explain to anyone why this is absurd. You don’t need to expose young people to gambling addictions in order to fund new games. At the same time, things an author writes (or things that the reader infers from the writing) do not always reflect their ideologies or actions in real life and they can sometimes seemingly be at odds with one another. This is something fans have to reckon with, and not just by saying “actually hatsune miku made limbus company” or whatever. Personally, I can’t take PM’s “anti capitalist” or “feminist” or “revolutionary” work seriously when in reality they have mistreated employees, sued labor unions, acquiesced to incel demands and then later added a meme into the game from that incel community. On the other hand people struggle to believe Project Moon could do anything wrong like this because of the stories in their games so they vehemently defend PM, which at some point just feels naïve. well hopefully this is the type of answer/discussion you were looking for lol thanks for writing 👍
40 notes · View notes
evolutionsvoid · 9 months
Text
Tumblr media
Whenever I go to new regions, I always make sure to talk to the locals and get a read on the area. Indeed, bookstores sell all sorts of guides for new locales and exotic locations, but you will never get anything more reliable and informative than the word of those who live there. It is especially important to me, because my interests don't exactly fit in with the recommended restaurants or must-get souvenirs. I want animals, I want plants and I want weird locations and little known habitats for me to do my research. Most people don't care about that stuff, sometimes even the locals, but often they know enough about the lay of the land to point me in the right direction. It also helps because they can give me a heads up about any dangers I may encounter, be it aggressive animals or local laws that I am not fully aware of.
Like there was one time I was out studying Bladed Prowlers when some kind folk informed me of a nearby fellow who really didn't like people walking into his territory. They said he fancied himself a warlord and staked out a big chunk of land that he declared his kingdom. All who dare tread upon his rightful land would answer to him. So obviously they advised me to avoid this region, lest I get scooped up by his men and punished for my intrusion. This was awfully kind of them, as it let me know to be cautious where I studied and to be mindful of my surroundings! I trespassed on his land anyways, because that is where the Prowlers were nested, but I now I knew the importance of not being caught! It did work out in the end, as his troops never got a hold of me, but he did learn of my presence so I did kind of have the rest of my trip haunted by his search parties.
But as I was saying! Local information and knowledge is crucial for my work, and it helps me avoid real dangerous scenarios. I always ask about their legends and rumors, to see if there are any places one would consider "haunted" or "cursed." Now everyone knows I am not a real superstitious dryad, and I often hesitate to take fantastical tales of monsters and horror at face value. No doubt many of these stories have logical answers and real culprits, but that isn't to say they are all useless. By hearing these legends and learning how the stars of these tales perish horribly, I can get an idea of what is really out there. And sometimes what I learn is enough for me to steer clear of these places too! For example, when I am in arid rocky places, with plenty of canyons, crevices and caves, I keep an ear open for any stories of people who delve into these stony depths and never return. That or blackened figures are found burnt into the walls and floors, as if they turned to ash. While some claim ghosts and spirits are responsible for disappearances, I think more of Flayers and other such predators. But when I hear about scorched outlines in rock, I know what is responsible and I make sure to stay far away! A story like that means a Sulfrik is lurking in the darkness, and no living being should ever wish to cross paths with one!
The origins and nature of the Sulfrik can be summed up with two points. One, is that they are a True Dragon, not some regular beast given a fancy name. And the second point, to really drive that home, is that they are related to the Fuldruk, that terror of the volcanic deserts. If you have read my entry on them, then you should know exactly why I avoid Sulfriks! The two share many similarities with each other, like the serpentine bodies, reduced limbs, clawed tails and bulbous heads with slender jaws. The Sulfrik does have some key differences though. Their bodies are not so spiky and blue, instead with hardened bumps along their armor and a vibrant green to their form. Their tail pincer is more rounded and wide, with long hollow spikes that can easily drive into flesh when they grab hold. Their heads have less sharp bits and a more exposed cranium, one filled with a special fluid. Instead of hunting with electrical pulses like the Fuldruk, they use echolocation to navigate their surroundings. They send out clicks and whistles, then absorb the bouncing sound with that gelatinous dome. Their long snouts have noticeably less teeth than their cousins, and instead have large fangs that curve upwards and wrap around the jaws. Some would think that this would make it hard to open their mouths, and they are right! A full grown Sulfrik will have its jaws almost locked shut by their woven teeth, but it hardly causes them any issue. They don't need to open their mouths that wide to eat, as they prefer a squishier, more liquid diet. 
The mention of it drinking its meals may cause some to breath a sigh of relief, as that must mean flesh is off the menu. May I remind you that many spiders have a liquid diet, and that is because their turn their prey's internal organs into soup. Just because you are currently not in a drinkable state, doesn't mean you can't be painfully processed into a gory slurry. The Sulfrik does exactly that for its prey, and my bark shivers to think what it must be like to fall victim to one. These dragons live in caves and deep crevices, hiding within darkness when the sun is out and hot. In shadowy canyons, they may still stir and slither during the day, but they seem to be in a more lax and sluggish state then. When night falls, however, they wake to their true potential and go out on the hunt.
They emerge from their lairs and burrows, and stalk the darkness for food. What they eat seems to be everything, as they don't hesitate to drop whatever they encounter. They silently slither through the blackness, keeping out of sight and using the cloak of night to their advantage. Sleeping prey is mostly targeted, but they will also go after those who aren't fully aware of their surroundings. When they strike, it isn't physically, rather they unleash their horrid breath weapon upon their victims. Stored within their bodies is a potent acid, one that is incredibly caustic and flammable. With their snouts forever sealed by their teeth, they have the perfect tube for spraying out this fluid, and that is what they do. It comes out in a pressurized spray, hosing down victims directly, or easing up the pressure to let out more of a caustic fog. With a scrape of their wrapped teeth, they can create a spark that ignites this acid and unleash something that can only be described as "acid flame." In this state, the burning fluid eats through armor and flesh in seconds, and prey are reduced to blackened puddles of goo. These are then eagerly slurped up by the Sulfrik's straw-like mouth, and then it slinks off for more food.
When they are hunting, Sulfriks appear to be ravenous, happily consuming anything they encounter. Perhaps because their prey is already pre liquefied and cooked it means that the digestion process happens quite quickly. They will melt anything they can, and take time to reestablish any territory markings they have put out, spraying their acid on notable rocks and walls to show that this land is theirs. Due to their size and appetite, only a single Sulfrik can live within a territory that is dozens of square miles. This is a good thing, because I can't imagine dealing with more than one! A single Sulfrik is usually enough to terrify an entire village into fleeing and I don't blame them!
Like many True Dragons, there is an intelligence to them. Unfortunately like their cousins, they don't seem to use it for meaningful conversation or curious discovery. Rather, they seek to entertain themselves and find ways to liven up their day (or night in this case). On the nicer side of things, they appear to have an artistic streak to them, using their acid to burn intricate patterns into stone. Or perhaps melt pieces of the landscape then mold their molten forms into something fun. The lair of a Sulfrik has many such art pieces, and it is clear they like to decorate their homes. I wish this is how they spent their time entirely, but unfortunately they do also find fun in playing with their food. If one isn't starving, they may take time to torment their prey, creating walls of acid flame or chasing them around tight canyons to extend the hunt and make their victim's struggle that much more entertaining. Their tail claws can be used to grab victims and sling them about like a doll, or inject acid directly into them so they can watch them flail and melt from within. Prey can also be used in their art, searing them into blackened patterns onto stone, or attempting to sculpt their molten bones and armor into a fun little art installation. I have heard many artists say that suffering, pain and little body fluids can make for interesting art pieces, but I sure hope this doesn't count. It seems a bit morbid, though I have heard wealthy collectors paying top coin for some collected Sulfrik sculptures. I wonder what they do about the smell....
It should seem obvious at this point that most people view Sulfriks as a scourge, a monstrous menace that will happily melt down herds of livestock and leave villages in ruin. While I feel it is a tad melodramatic when people claim this for every dragon, I do understand their terror when faced with these fellows. When Sulfriks come across towns, they tend to get a mischievous side to them and find people to be amusing play things. They may light buildings aflame, ambush people at night or cause random death and destruction before slinking off into their labyrinthine homes. It is like the species is well aware that folks have a real hard time slaying them, so that means they can get away with a whole lot.
The narrow crevices and maze-like canyons let them hide and lose their pursuers with ease, and their acid flame eats through all non-magic armors. Their hide is heavily armored with plates, and their serpentine bodies are fast and lethal. Their claw tails snare hunters and smash them against the stone walls, while their flame devours the entire battlefield, reducing everyone to screaming bubbling soup. The only real hope is rupturing their fluid filled craniums, which will destroy their ability to properly echolocate. This means they are blind, which is good for getting in a sneak attack, but it also means they will flail and fire with wild abandon. With all this in mind, Sulfrik bounties tend to fetch an exorbitant prize, but they are very rarely claimed. There are few in this world that will happily hunt one of these things. In most cases, people find the lair of the Sulfrik and then seal it up during the day when they are slumbering within. The hope is that it dooms the creature, leaving them to starve in this stony prison. Often, though it seems they find their way out through tunnels or and other cracks, resulting in their territory changing as they pop out in some new area. That will mean the menace is gone for our poor besieged town, but unfortunately that often means it is now someone else's problem.   
Chlora Myron
Dryad Natural Historian
------------------------------------------------------
"Sulfrik"
We got another dragon here, and one related to the Fuldruk! Couldn't let that concept just end at one! Especially with there being more weird cetacean skulls to base them on!
113 notes · View notes
Text
in less than 60 days, It will have been a year since blaseball was suddenly canceled.
TRUST ME, THE OTHER TAGS WILL MAKE SENSE IN A LITTLE WHILE.
Blaseball, in its 2.867 Years of existence, was many things. but the easiest way to describe it is "Good". It had a very incredible fanbase that still kind of mourns the game to this day. the devs had a panel at GDC in 2022. It was nominated for a Nebula Award for Best Game Writing in 2021 and also the "Best Video Game" at The Hugo Awards in 2021. It won the Nuovo Award at the independent games festival in 2021. people could observe the games happening, gamble fake money, and also affect how the story and the characters would develop at certain points. It was a great game, that sadly was canceled because the cost that was needed to run the game was too high for the team at the game band to support, at least according to wikipedia. It being dead is also a major part in proving that there is no justice in the universe because of it not being here, yet SILENT HILL ASCENSION SOMEHOW HASN'T KICKED THE BUCKET YET.
Now for all Silent Hill fans who have blocked that game out of their memory, and for everyone who has no idea what Silent Hill Ascension IS, here is a refresher:
"Released" on October 31st, 2023 (which was already a bad day for me, but I am NOT getting into that), Silent Hill Ascension is an interactive thing (listen its not a tv show, and it isnt a video game. the developers say that its "the best of both", but lets be honest its more of the WORST of both) that is canon to the silent hill franchise.
people can observe the games happening, gamble fake money, and also affect how the story and the characters would develop at certain points. Yes, I know this sounds EXACTLY the same as what I described blaseball as, but thats because I purposefully oversimplified both games a bit. Silent Hill Ascencion has bland writing (so bland people even thought it was AI), all the mechanical depth of a bad mobile game, and all the horrible microtransactions (loot boxes, a season pass, and something else I will get into later) as well. Blaseball, as previously mentioned, was nominated for several story writing awards, had enough mechanical depth that some fans created a SCIENTIFIC COLLECTIVE TO ANALYZE IT, and at the time it died, NEVER had any micro transactions or a fee to enter.
Remember how both games use fake money? In Blaseball, those who were in the 1% of money havers had all their coins distributed to the other players. In Silent Hill Ascension, you can literally just buy so many "Influence Points" that you can manipulate the entire fucking story, and you can hoard them for as long as you fucking want. Also, Something else I want to mention: Literally nobody talks about Silent Hill Ascension because its so bad. hell, and those that do talk about it DON'T have anything good to say. very few people play it, and there are a shit ton of bots that the devs added so it feels like more people are actually watching. Silent Hill Ascension has reached lower lows than blaseball ever did, and is less than half a year old. So why the hell is it still alive, when a game that did its entire stick better is fucking dead. THE ONLY REASON I CAN THINK OF FOR IT BEING ALIVE IS BECAUSE ITS SUPPORTED BY FUCKING KONAMI.
There is no justice in the world.
19 notes · View notes
goingferalapparently · 2 months
Text
Do you want to hear me talk about The Animatic? No? Well that sucks because I'm talking about it anyway.
I don't know what made me suddenly want to make a full length animatic, but the urge descended upon me and I did anyway, despite my horrible horrible track record.
●~●~●~●~●
Tumblr media
I'd actually had a couple voice clips cut out since July (because that's when I started Jealousy), but the bulk of it was done 15/16 August. And! This song (Pentatonix's God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen) is actually the second one I tried piecing together.
Tumblr media
The first song was AURORA's Runaway! I swapped songs pretty early on because
Runaway was 4 minutes long and God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen was 2.5 minutes long
3 minutes in, I ran out of voice clips.
I used a lot more voice clips for Runaway than God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen, not just because it's longer but also because the song is significantly slower and thus easier to fit voice clips in it. Not just more voice clips, but the voice clips were longer too.
(God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen had 9 source clips. Runaway had 15.)
Hindsight is 20/20 though, because due to the slow-paced nature of Runaway in comparison to God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen would have resulted in far less frames needing to be drawn, or precise cuts or-
Well, you get the point.
●~●~●~●~●
Tumblr media Tumblr media
I have two files for this project! Yes, it was pure Medibang. The reason for the two files is that there were so many layers that the first file was lagging to hell and back and I couldn't even draw a straight line because of how bad it was.
●~●~●~●~●
Tumblr media
This was the actual first frame I ever drew for this! If it looks familiar, it's because I was mirroring this. It's my first ever fanart for QSMP.
At the time of starting this, I had maybe 3 pieces of QSMP fanart and was super uncertain of what I was doing, so it definitely happened again - mirroring a piece of fanart into an animatic frame.
Tumblr media
●~●~●~●~●
Tumblr media
This was the first time I ever drew Cucurucho. I had an idea and it was simple to execute but over time I forgot about the voice box.
Tumblr media
This, on the other hand, was the last frame I ever drew. The Cucurucho designs are largely the same, with some minor differences (bigger eyes, more stitches, no voice box, thinner tube).
●~●~●~●~●
Tumblr media
This was the first time I successfully drew Cellbit. Emphasis on successfully because even this one bit took me forever. I never really had to redraw any frame once I drafted it, but this. This took me 5 redraws. It was my greatest nightmare.
●~●~●~●~●
I've said it before but these two frames side by side?
Tumblr media Tumblr media
It was my favourite part of the animatic for the longest time. Hands down, no debate, I adored it.
●~●~●~●~●
You may notice that most frames had the subjects coloured in a lighter colour, but a couple didn't. Some were intentional, to better show off lighting and backgrounds and depth and stuff.
Tumblr media
Some.... were not.
Tumblr media
(Oops.)
●~●~●~●~●
Some of my other favourite frames include:
Tumblr media
Which would have been better if I hadn't messed up the shading.
Tumblr media
Because this was so many characters. And Cellbit.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
And the Bagheras, which I really had a ton of fun drawing near the end. Because these two were drawn at the end. The same day, actually. The first one did have a draft already, though.
●~●~●~●~●
Some little details:
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Between these two frames, BBH and Cellbit pop up in the background. There's a flash of white immediately after, which is supposed to be the camera flash when BBH takes a photo.
••●••
Tumblr media
Jaiden (and Roier) in the early scenes have perfectly normal eyes.
Tumblr media
This changes immediately after Bobby's death, albeit rather subtly.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
By the time the beginning of the Cucurucho tasks rolls around, the shadows under their eyes have had time to develop and become more prominent.
••●••
Tumblr media
Roier does a little rooftop espionage.
••●••
Similar/Similarly located scenes have similarly coloured backgrounds!
It's most prominent with Bobby Fields' Rose/Lavender palette, with a few (not all) examples.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
(The words associated with this last image are actually from when Jaiden got stuck on a ladder on her way down from the sunset tree while trying to chase Cucurucho. I just found that funny.)
But the colour thing is also key with Baghera and Jaiden's conversation with Pomme's non-canon death.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
The colours used for 1) the gradient background 2) the lineart and 3) the subject base colour are identical in both images, even if they're a third of the video apart.
●~●~●~●~●
Anyway, this was made with Medibang and iMovie, even if I do have Krita and DaVinci Resolve and FlipaClip and-
.........Yeah.
Tried and true basics, I guess.
(Krita and DaVinci both cause my laptop to overheat. I struggle with Krita so incredibly badly, even though I have friends who swear by it.)
●~●~●~●~●
Also I maxed out the image count on this post.
12 notes · View notes
aeor-is-for-reccing · 6 months
Text
Survey Results! Finally!
I’m finally getting to posting the survey results! It’s taken about a month longer than I expected – work got busy and my laptop screen is busted. Also, writing this out took was longer than I expected – ten pages in total.  And that’d be a horrible tumblr post.  So instead, here’s the main findings and the longform answers, and you can take a look at the google doc here for a more in depth analysis from each question.
Main Findings:
Respondents are about evenly divided as to whether or not they reblog.
People generally kudos and comment!
Nobody knows we have a fic randomizer.  (We have a fic randomizer. It’s on the spreadsheet)
Sixty percent of respondents either do or would self rec
The biggest write in answer for why people don’t rec is shyness
The biggest reason for why people don’t read is they don’t remember to go back
Opening up the reclist is contentious, people are generally okay with a script and could use a reminder
What we're doing/did in response:
There’s now a @reclister role on AiFL, request it to get pinged when the rec list goes up or to get reminders as to when to rec
I’m posting what fics have been recced with the 24 hour reminder and the tag list.
I’ve added ‘Less Common Authors’ as a possible theme
I’m going to open up the reccing sheet to everyone – I just have to lock down some stuff first
I’ll update the value filters for the reccing sheet
I’m going to work on a script that updates the basic fields (title, author, word count, rating, ect) for the form.  This one might take a bit.
And now , the long form responses, under the cut:
Thanks to everyone who was thankful that I was doing this! We’re just going to be a thanks ouroboros, happily!
The reason I don’t rec every week is that I find writing summaries hard, everything else is easy for me/The summaries aren’t very useful to me:
So, a short guide to writing summaries for recs:
If the author has something that works – you can always copy it. Part of the reason why this isn’t ‘just a copy and paste what they have’ option is that AO3 summaries can take up space, and we don’t want folks to get sad about having to scroll lots. But if the author has a sentence at the bottom of the summary that explains everything, there’s no reason to do more work.
If the author didn’t provide a one sentence summary, then include the basics of the plot. (Essek gets dicked down by Caleb, Essek and Caleb skip through the wildflowers together, aeorian magic turns Caleb into a capybara and Essek into a hot tub filled with oranges, ect).  Then add an adjective or two that has something to do with tone.  (A hilarious story about Essek being dicked down by Caleb, a tense account of Essek and Caleb skipping through the wildflowers together; Aerian magic turns Caleb into a capybara and Essek into a hot tub full of oranges. It’s surprisingly romantic.) Think about how it made you feel, what genre you would put it in, what tags you’d add on storygraph.
Don’t worry if it’s kind of dry! A) It’s probably less dry than you think, and b) you can do more gushing within the ‘what you liked about it’ section.
One last thing to remember – there’s no one right way to make a summary, people are looking for different things.
If the rec form was opened up to people who aren’t on AIFL don’t you think the name would need to be changed to reflect that it’s not an AIFL thing anymore?
Maybe! I wasn’t planning on not posting it on AiFL, and I’d suspect that the majority of reccers would still be AiFL members (just because getting notifications of something on tumblr is a lot harder).  But to be honest, this would be a relatively small issue.
I'm not a huge shadowgast fan, but I think reclists are cool, and sometimes the fics are relevant to my interests
Thanks!  Have you heard about the other reclists?  There’s @critter-genfic-events for a genfic one that was started by @Professor-Rye and is now being run by @operafloozy, there’s @widomaukficrecs, and I also have the reccing blog tools (group version or single user) in case you want to start your own!
Less a suggestion and more a general thought. I believe the anonymity of the reccers is an important part of this process and I am in no way saying that should be removed, but at the same time, it does feel impersonal, like a lack of commitment to one's tastes. Word of mouth doesn't tend to sway me to read new fic when I don't know the mouths the words are coming from. That said, take this with a grain of salt because, for the time being, I'm not the target audience of the rec lists.
Hey thanks for the comment! I agree with you! There’s a definite trade off in not knowing whether a reccer’s tastes line up with your own. It means that there’s not a great way to add moderation into the rec list, and with anonymity being an ever- dwindling resource on the internet, people’s attitudes towards it have shifted further into suspicion of intent. Even when it’s something like a rec list, I think there can be an anxiety about people finding a way to use it to bully authors – moreso than even having a consistent pseudonym. When really, I think there’s a good reason why reccers might want anonymity. Admitting you like something can be a vulnerable act! Social anxiety was the number one write-in reason as to why people didn’t rec, as is. I want people to feel comfortable reccing fics that are weird or kinky or require a lot of different warnings, and I wanted people to feel comfortable reccing their own fics. And it’s one thing to leave a kudos on someone’s work while signed in – something nobody else is going to see unless they bother to look – and another to put your name saying you enjoy any sort of beastiality or noncon or whatever else where any purity culture lover can object to on tumblr for all to see. The last thing I want is for people to be hurt or harassed because they participated in something that’s supposed to be a net good.
Anyway, this is all saying that I don’t think your concern is unfounded – and while I’m not likely to change anything about this rec list’s anonymity, if anyone else wants to try their hand at running one, it’s something to think about.
Also, I know I tend to read fic the same way, but it does seem to be a ton of repeat authors week-to-week, so maybe if once in a while the list can be to branch out to a never recc’d person?
I really like this idea, but the logistics of it are a little complex. I crunched the numbers, and out of 558 recs, there’s been 175 authors recced. Which is admittedly is a lot of overlap, but also that’s a lot to expect reccers to keep track of.  But a top ten list should be doable!  I crunched the numbers a couple of different ways – top numbers of times an author was recced, top number of different fics recced by an author, and top number of themes recced, which got me a list of fourteen authors – that seems doable. It’s now a possible theme.
More Information I got from number crunching includes:
86 authors have only been recced once
418 fics have been recced, 324 have only been recced once.
Most recced fics are Hard Mouth at seven times.
Royalgreen has had the most recs at 24, the most fics recced at 18, and the most themes recced at 17, but they also have 51 Critical Role Fics, so.
Further info can be found in this details sheet. I've also added a randomizer for general use, just because.
knowing upcoming themes further in advance
This can be done – it’s how the genfic rec list is currently set up. (as a note, while I’m currently running the genfic rec list, @professor-rye was the one to create it).
The AiFL rec list is currently set up so you can rec fics after the tumblr post, with the idea that people would probably look at the list of recs at the google sheet – which I realize isn’t the way it’s currently used. So you can still rec later, it just doesn’t have the same visibility.  (The two exceptions for this are the ‘older recs’ and the ‘hidden gems’ recurring themes, because we know they’re going to recur and they’re not likely to be ineligible when the theme rolls around again, the way works in progress might be).
Logistically, the selecting the upcoming themes in advance doesn’t work as well from the admin side. Instead of remembering that next week is the last Tuesday of the month, I’ve got to remember to count the Tuesdays and order the progress.  Right now the way it goes is that we pick the theme from the randomizer right before we post the reclist, so the same theme gets pasted into the ‘next week’s theme’ section, the google form, and the tumblr post at the same time. If I’m choosing a theme a month out, I select next month’s theme, add it to the google form, then go back and check what I’d selected a month ago and post that into the tumblr post and next week’s theme. 
There’s also the fact that if we give too much lead time, it means folk procrastinate and forget. Most of the recs currently come in soon after I post the tag list or the 24 reminders as is, and while some people on the gen fic reclist post for multiple weeks at a time, I find that most of the recs are for the week of, anyway.
Anyway, I’m not completely against this, but currently the drawbacks outweigh the perks. Figuring out a different way to sort the upcoming themes for the genfic list is on my to-do list, maybe afterwards I’ll come back and revisit.
20 notes · View notes
marshmallowprotection · 5 months
Note
I always wonder about Yoosung’s relationship with Rika’s parents. I can’t remember if there’s ever anything in the game about it? But I really wonder what such horrible, abusive people were like to the rest of their family
So, this is covered in different parts of the game over time, but what he explains is that his aunt and uncle are displaced from the rest of the family. Contact is limited, if at all. That's why he did not know his cousin until high school. He didn't have the chance to get to know her because that part of the family was ostracized from his half.
The way he talked about them seemed as though there might have been a little bit of contact, but the kind of contact you get when you only talk to somebody maybe once every year.
However, his understanding of his cousin's family is far from the truth. He was surprised that they didn't attend the funeral, after all. He has no idea about the abuse Rika went through. I highly doubt anyone on his side of the family knows anything about that. We do not know much about the family's opinion of Rika, either. Do they consider her a real part of the family? Do they think of her as less because she was adopted?
There are a lot of context clues we can infer from but not enough for us to make a solid answer. The only thing we can really pull from what we know is that nobody really knows what's going on beyond closed doors.
There is a phone call where you pretend to be his aunt, and you play around with him for a moment as if you are no different than a normal doting aunt, and he doesn't say anything that seems to imply that that would be out of character. So, I can only assume that his dynamic with them, outside of the limited reach it has, is that of somebody who is putting on a show for everybody else to seem holier than thou.
If you play Rika Behind Story, it becomes abundantly clear why they were cut off from the rest of the family to a limited to no contact situation. They are extremely religious and follow a particular pastor who is far from a good man, and I'll leave it at that.
It is abundantly clear to everyone who plays that DLC that Rika is only adopted because her adopted parents could likely not have children of their own. They thought of her as less because of that, since Rika didn't live up to be the child they built in their head. It's sick, frankly.
Those two were so in love with the idea of having a child that they did not consider the depth that goes into having a child. They didn't really want a child, they wanted something they could control, just as the church controls them. What they needed was not a child, what could have served their purpose could have been a pet or a toy.
But, Yoosung has no idea about any of that. All he knows is that his family doesn't really speak to them much and there is history there that nobody wants to talk about. I don't think the rest of the Kim family is aware of what's really going on outside of what dragged them to steer clear of Rika's mother and father.
Unfortunately, there is a lot about the Kim family we don’t know. Yoosung has an older sister we know nothing about. We also don't know anything about his father, and even though you can speak to his mother in the RAE, and we see events with her throughout the game, we still don’t really know anything about her outside of her parenting style. 
I, for one, would love to know more about them, but I doubt we're going to get anything so we're just going to have to fill in the blanks. I think Yoosung’s mom and Rika’s mom are sisters. We don't know, as far as I can remember, which parent that woman is related to, but it makes more sense to me if it's his mother. 
13 notes · View notes
eliza-makepeace · 4 months
Text
murtagh book thoughts
okay, it's been a while since i finished the murtagh book, and i've managed to figure out in coherent thoughts what it made me feel. it's coherent thoughts but it's not a coherent exposition, so you're warned.
in terms of the story, how its divided and all of that -- i liked the first half of the book very much. very enjoyable, murtagh's dealing with his past and his issues, trying to find where the stone comes from, we see his and thorn's bond... fun stuff. some parts are heartwrenching, but in general, it's interesting and enjoyable. still, it feels a bit like a videogame, where you have to get to point a, to point b, to point c in order to get your objective. and as much as i appreciate the new depths of worldbuilding paolini takes us into in "murtagh", i still feel like it's not "proper" worldbuilding.
by that i mean it feels like one of those old western movies where you know the characters can't walk too far away because what you think is a long field is actually a painted wall. the concepts are there: lyreth, the girl who fancied him at court... but you try to look a bit further into them and they're hollow.
the second half of the book, when they meet bachel and chaos ensues... not really my cup of tea. and it's not because i don't like storylines like that, where there's an interesting and fucked-up female character, cults and so forth. that's actually a pretty interesting idea, if only it had been properly executed. personally, my biggest issue with it is that murtagh already had gone through this. he'd already gone through having his agency taken from him, having to do horrible deeds because he can't help it, feeling hopeless and used... and i'm not complaining about this decision because murtagh is my poor little meow meow (although he is). i'm complaining because i feel like it reduces his experiences with galbatorix to nothing. back in inheritance, him being galby's name slave was the worst thing that could and had happened to him. now? bachel's worse. but it's the same principle. and i still think galby had more reason to be worse mentally and in terms of identity, for murtagh, than bachel was.
it also erases all of the healing and character development he'd gone through in the first half of the book. you could argue "oh, now that he's experienced freedom he can deal with bachel better than he could with galby" but i don't really agree and i don't really care. what's the point in destroying him in the ic, putting him relatively back together in the first half, and then obliterating him again (and worse, apparently) in the latter half. and then he's sad, and tired and devastated, but less so than in inheritance (which doesn't make sense if bachel was worse for him than galby), when he sees nasuada again.
the irony that murtagh's bond with alín feels more organic and natural than his with nasuada.... not in terms of characters being alike, just in the way it's written. paolini could've bothered with showing scenes of m and n at farthen dur, bonding, "courting" as he put it, so that the rest of their relationship actually has a strong base for the rest of the ic (giving a proper explanation which originally isn't there because the ic is in eragon's pov and not murtagh's), and so that their reunion is far more meaningful because it shows nasuada and him knew each other, actually bonded with each other before murtagh was kidnapped in eldest, to the point of developing romantic feelings for each other. if paolini hadn't put murtagh in random side quests throughout the book, he could've shown this and it would've worked better imo.
personally i think we didn't get enough tornac, or selena. i think murtagh should've pondered more about what it meant that eragon was brom's kid. what it meant about selena, how that changed murtagh's perception of her as a person. i'm a bit tired she gets reduced to just being his and eragon's mom, and it seems like that's the only way paolini wants them to see her too. murtagh seeing his mom like an individual, a person with her lights and shadows, with her depth, might have been an interesting thing and a new way to see himself as her son. every time paolini is about to reach something interesting with his characters, he changes course and i think that's a shame.
8 notes · View notes
Text
Tumblr media
The Morning Gift
Author: Eva Ibbotson
First published: 1993
Rating:  ★★★★☆
I adored this story! A romance born on the eve of WW2, that holds the foreboding but still shows you that people still lived their lives and had their hopes. I was happy to note that for once the main female character of Ibbotson´s is not a sheer perfection (this girl has actually some issues to go through), though I admit I could still do without the comically evil rival (it would have been so much more interesting if there actually at least appeared a possibility the other girl might succeed). But all in all, especially because of the last third of the book, I thought this was a well-crafted romance with some, perhaps cheesy, but well-used tropes. Just, for the love of god, DO NOT listen to this as an audiobook recorded by Kate Lock, who insisted on using a fake German accent and squeaky voice for the main character, making her sound like a stupid child of 10. (And that is not the only horrible thing she does to the selected characters).
Jane, the Fox & Me
Author: Fanny Britt
First published: 2012
Rating: ★★★★☆
A beautifully executed graphic novel in which the story somewhat fizzles out and feels unfinished, definitely could have been longer and yet I rate it quite high simply because it hit me like a train. I was not a fat kid but all my life I felt I was, even if in my case there was no bullying. I felt this little girl´s pain deeply.
The Witches: Salem, 1692
Author: Stacy Schiff
First published: 2015
Rating: ★★★☆☆
I think Stacy Schiff is an excellent historian and has an extremely readable style of writing. I also think she has done a stupendous job putting this mammoth project together, but I need to agree with those who complain about the density and slowness of the text. It is next to impossible to keep track of the names and the accusations/descriptions of the alleged witchcraft are so similar (or completely the same) that it is very taxing to keep up. I am not sure whether I should be complaining though, because, after all, I DID want a book about these events and I got it. I would recommend an audiobook though, makes it easier to get through.
The Clockmaker's Daughter
Author: Kate Morton
First published: 2018
Rating: ★★★★☆
This is a story of a house and people connected to it in an intriguing web of connections. It spans from the 1860s to the modern day, not always in chronological order, and I must say that Kate Morton managed to jump through the timelines quite effortlessly. There is a great number of characters but I had no problems following who was who, though admittedly some of the timelines were less interesting than the others (notably and predictably for me I enjoyed the modern one the least). I also had trouble when some things, already revealed to the reader, were "revealed" again. The main voice is that of a ghost (trust me, this is not a spoiler), and while I did not mind it, I also believe the book would have been stronger had that been completely committed and we only got to know that particular character from the other stories it touches. Even after all that I have to say I was surprised at how easy this was to read (it IS a chunker) and how much I enjoyed it.
A Face Like Glass
Author: Frances Hardinge
First published: 2012
Rating: ★★★☆☆
I adore the fact that Frances Hardinge does not talk down to children, because this is undeniably a middle-grade book, but does not shy from some pretty heavy stuff. However perhaps I have read too much Frances Hardinge at this point because I tend to really like/be intrigued by the start of her books, her world-building and her unique ideas, but then it all became too much with this one and I was impatient for the story to be over.
Brigid of Kildare
Author: Heather Terrell
First published: 2009
Rating: ★★☆☆☆
I am sad to report that this book was kind of a mess. The historical bits would have been just fine on their own, even if I had wanted a little more depth, many a time I felt like we were merely dipping our toes into the fascinating story of Brigid. But then the author decided to weave in a "mystery" set in modern times and those chapters, apart from being unnecessary to the story, felt just tedious to the point I was considering skipping them altogether. A bummer.
When Women Were Dragons
Author: Kelly Barnhill
First published: 2022
Rating: ★★★☆☆
As long as it was a family tragedy infused with the elusive and unexplained, I was enjoying this book quite a lot. But then, in its second half, it becomes too wordy, too idealistic, too uninteresting.
The Silent Unseen
Author: Amanda McCrina
First published: 2022
Rating: ★★☆☆☆
The good thing: the topic, even if you have read loads of WW2 books, is an unusual one. The bad thing: the story is extremely weak (walking and talking do not an intriguing narrative make), the characters shallow, the motivations extremely basic, the romance needless and not particularly well done. No matter how many betrayals posing as shocking twists you cram into the last third, you cannot make me invested in this.
Charlotte's Web
Author: E.B.White
First published: 1952
Rating: ★★★★☆
As a non-UK and non-US child, I have never read this book when I was its target audience. I picked it up now more for the super cute edition than anything else. And indeed throughout I kept thinking: sure, it´s cute. But is it that great? And then I got kicked in the guts by that friggin ending.
Emily Wilde's Map of the Otherlands
Author: Heather Fawcett
First published: 2024
Rating: ★★★★★
Just as enjoyable and delightful as the first volume! I love the tone, the language, and the romance (I am SHIPPING Emily and Wendell so hard), it can be both touching and humorous at the same time. Cannot wait for the conclusion of this series which so far I find to be one of the most joyous literary events in years.
The Great Mortality: An Intimate History of the Black Death, the Most Devastating Plague of All Time
Author: John Kelly
First published: 2005
Rating: ★★★★☆
The Black Death epidemic of the 14th century remains one of the most gruesomely fascinating events in European history and I dare say this book is a very accessible, informative and well-organized study of it. It is strictly chronological, leading you in the steps of the disease, and adding stories and explanations that make it all less clinical and more humanly tragic. Just perhaps the ending sounds way too much like "but in the end it was a good thing" felt like a very, very weird conclusion.
Psyche and Eros
Author: Luna McNamara
First published: 2023
Rating: ★★☆☆☆
I finished this book out of spite more than anything else. The myth of Psyche and Reos may just be my favourite of all the Greek myths, unfortunately instead of crafting it into something fresh and memorable Luna McNamara tried her hand at mixing every Greek myth you have ever heard of and made Psyche insufferable during the process for good measure. It is not even subtle mixing, instead, she goes full Marvel Universe of Greek gods on you, twisting the story to incredible lengths just to cram more of the mythology into her book. I would also say that the original myth takes quite a beating in this reimagining, being stripped of much that made it so appealing to me as a reader. Sometimes less is more.
A Middle-Earth Traveller: Sketches from Bag End to Mordor
Author: John Howe
First published: 2018
Rating: ★★★★★
Beautifully executed "sketchbook". It would seem that while Alan Lee was more concerned with the Elven stuff, John Howe focused on Dwarves, Orcs and the more gritty parts we saw in the movies. There are, however, also illustrations from the Silmarillion included. I would imagine this is a perfect book to take with you outside, where you can sit under a tree and just leaf through, dreaming of Middle-Earth.
5 notes · View notes
pits-of-kaos · 1 year
Note
My poor little meow meow Prowl is loosing—
Like man, how does that sad little meow meow not evoke pity? Even in the slightest?
He was beaten to a pump by Optimus, refused to be killed in the name of mercy, mind controlled and almost killed his comrade which would probably make him feel really guilty, betrayed by who he thought were friends, had needles stuck in the back of his head by CHROMEDOME just to get rid of his memories unconsensually, probably has quite a bit of trauma from sending people out to die but do you think he had ever wanted too? Probably not, but it was his job and if he was going to do it, he was going to do it with the least amount of casualties. And people forgave Megatron of all Cybertronians, who killed almost an entire race and species with his bare hands and many more, but didn’t forgive Prowl just because he didn’t change his thoughts and opinions.
Welp, that was a bit of a long rant— but yeah, this is just my opinion, Megatron is still great and I love him, but I will always vote Prowl :D
One word: Packaging.
Or more specifically, the way he packages his pain.
(I’m not sure if you’re looking for an actual answer, but I’m gonna give one since I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. Keep in mind that a lot of this is speculation.)
Quantifiably, Prowl did far less horrible things than Megatron, but Megatron has (1) a secure place in the franchise, (2) a redemption arc, and (3) looks*.
*so most fans say, anyway. My opinion on this fluctuates.
Also, Megatron’s reaction to his struggles is very different from Prowl’s.
When he’s in pain emotionally, Megatron directs it toward himself for the most part. Same with Starscream, Chromdome, and several others who have been through hell in the war.
But Prowl? Prowl refuses to acknowledge his wounds and takes it out on those around him and the world at large. His need for control is rooted in deep insecurity and a feeling of not being safe anywhere or with anyone. Even Tarantulas of all people picked up on Prowl’s desperate need to convince himself he was in control even when he really wasn’t. That tips me off to the depth of Prowl’s pain and self-deception, which he’s almost entirely numb to.
Most people will have more pity for someone like Megatron, Chromedome, or even Starscream who struggle in an obvious or self-pitying way versus someone like Prowl whose pain drives him to antagonize others and act like he can’t ever be wrong. It’s easier for most fans in the TF fandom to look at Prowl and blame him for his problems because of his outward pomposity. And in some cases, it’s true.
At the end of the day, a contrite or self-pitying sufferer gets more pity than a pompous one. Chromedome is the former and Prowl is most certainly the latter.
This was going to be longer because I have a lot more to say about this topic, but I cut it short because I believe I answered your question adequately. The rest will have to go in another post on main. That is, if I decide to share it at all. I still hold my breath every time I bring up IDW Prowl.
37 notes · View notes