#this one's not necessarily in the same continuity as the previous one

[theamityelf]

"I think I like the story better if I'm not Hajime," Izuru says late one night.

They're in bed. Makoto's bed. Makoto's dorm. His head is on Makoto's chest, and Makoto's hand is slightly tangled in his hair. "Hm?" Makoto hums.

"I think I feel better about the story if I'm not Hajime. It feels nicer if Hajime is the idiot who left you and I'm the one who came to replace him. The better one."

Makoto is silent for a while before he quietly says, "I think...not wanting to be Hajime makes you more like him than ever." He sounds as if his throat has tightened. "It was kind of his biggest problem."

"Maybe. But if I were Hajime, then you shouldn't be holding me. He doesn't deserve your affection, after he abandoned you."

"Please stop saying that."

Izuru smells salt and quickly sits up, brushing away the tears on Makoto's cheeks. But he can't help adding, "How could I want to be someone who hurt you this badly?"

"It's not your fault. What Hope's Peak did to you wasn't okay. It wasn't right. You didn't know it would be...the way it was. And no one was there for you when it happened."

Caressing Makoto's face with his palm, Izuru sighs, "It doesn't feel like anger at myself, when I say that you forgive him too easily."

"Well, I guess that part is good; I don't want you to be angry with yourself. Especially not over something that was done to you."

"It was done to him to make me. And I'm glad. I'm better than him."

"Can I ask you not to insult my boyfriend, please?" Makoto says firmly.

Izuru subsides, cuddling into his chest again. "I've been insensitive."

"No. You've just been...honest. About how you feel."

"And how do you feel?"

"That doesn't matter."

Izuru turns his head. "Repeat that."

"I just mean...We're talking about your identity. I'm not trying to ask you to be Hajime for my sake if you don't want to be."

"I'm asking how you feel."

Makoto is stroking his hair again, soothing him, as he sits on his answer for longer than he needs to. Finally, he whispers, "The story feels better if Hajime came back for me. But if loving you means loving a new person who isn't Hajime, I can do that. I do love you, I mean."

"As much as you loved him?"

"That's not...I don't see things like that. My heart doesn't measure things that way."

Izuru nearly argues that that can't be true, for if Makoto is dating him and not Togami, then he must have some manner by which his heart measures how much it feels for someone relative to someone else. But he doesn't say it. Makoto isn't lying to him, so one of them must be missing something. Either way, pursuing the matter now might hurt him again.

"I love you," Makoto continues, "and I love Hajime. And I love you for your differences as much as your similarities."

"Is that comfortable for you? Loving us both?"

"Love isn't always comfortable."

The truism, the non-specificity of it, suggests an unwillingness to engage the question on a personal level. "Do you think you will ever be ready to grieve him?"

"I don't think he's dead. He became you- a different person who I also love."

"Sunk cost fallacy."

"What does that mean?"

He contemplates not answering but finds that he has a perverse need for this point to be understood. "It means you wouldn't love me if you hadn't loved him. You feel you have to love me because you loved him."

"Why are you torturing yourself about this?"

"Because Hinata didn't deserve you when he had you and deserved you less when he left you." It feels better to use his surname, to eschew familiarity. "How could he leave you?"

The hand continues stroking his hair. "Hajime didn't do anything wrong. He was exploited by the school. And you never asked for any of this. I'm not mad at either of you, and I don't want you to be either."

Izuru relaxes, slowly. "Then the school is the one that made you cry." He considers that. It might be romantic to find some way to punish the ones who killed Hinata, for Makoto's sake. Though Izuru is still glad that Hinata is gone and he is here, maybe Makoto would feel a sense of closure if something befell the ones who caused it. Maybe...

Makoto's voice pulls him back from deep internal deliberations of the most romantic way to visit revenge on the murderers of the ex-boyfriend of one's boyfriend.

"We'll figure things out together, okay? I'm glad you spoke up about not wanting to be called Hajime. And even if Hajime...didn't come back for me..." (The tightness in his throat again.) "...you brought me whatever parts of him still exist."

The suggestion that he has provided something valuable causes Izuru to purr. Though the hair-stroking plays a role in that, too. "I don't always not want you to call me Hajime," he finds himself saying. "Sometimes I like it."

There is a slight change in Makoto's heart rate. "O-Okay. Then, just let me know when your preferences change."

He's gotten Makoto's hopes up, again. Which seems like a correct or at least fitting thing for an Ultimate Hope to do- as he told himself frequently, back when he was using Hinata's name to keep Makoto close -but he hopes it doesn't lead to more sadness.

Izuru isn't the same person as the talentless who Makoto used to love. But sometimes he feels enough like a product of him, an updated software to the buggy original program, that the name feels right for him. And sometimes the name remains wrong but the act of obfuscating this feels like a more apt, more satisfying solution to the problem of Hinata- a way to be everything to Makoto, everything he needs. And sometimes there's a degree of schadenfreude- an answer to his resentment of the one who made Makoto unhappy and still hoards some fraction of his love -to wearing his name around like a trophy. A spoil. The pelt of a slain creature.

But Makoto probably wouldn't think him capable of the third feeling. The second one might cross his mind, but first one, the one where he is Hajime just a little, will be the interpretation he most wants to default to.

Izuru listens to the way Makoto's breathing slows as he falls asleep, the hand in his hair gradually stilling. Hinata didn't sleep with Makoto like this. Didn't get to appreciate the soft sound of Makoto's breathing, the gentle thrum of his heartbeat under his face. According to Makoto, Hinata slept over very rarely, and Hinata was too awkward to cuddle.

This space where he rests his head, where he feels Makoto's heart as acutely as the touch of a hand, is his space. Only his.

"I love you," he whispers. And because Makoto is asleep, he allows himself to add, "More than he did."

Because he would never leave.

#danganronpa #izuru kamukura #makoto naegi #hajime hinata #kamuegi #hinaegi #hinaegi school au #my fanfic #this one's not necessarily in the same continuity as the previous one

[vanteguccir]

Long live | Matt Sturniolo

Matt Sturniolo x reader

Summary: Where the Cut The Camera Podcast comes to an end and Matt feels emotional about it, but Y/N is there to comfort him.

Warning: Sad talk, crying.

Requested?: Yes, by anon.

Author's note: That is my work, I DON'T authorize any plagiarism! | English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if there's any grammar error.

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The time had come to say goodbye to the Cut The Camera Podcast.

If Y/N said her eyes weren't filled with trapped tears that she was fighting so hard not to spill, she would be lying.

The girl was sitting on the floor on one of the fluffy pink cushion that decorated the Podcast studio, her back was pressed against the door next to the stairs as she silently listened to what the boys were saying, looking up to them from time to time.

That was a habit she had created months before, practically since the beginning of the Podcast, where she would simply enter the studio with the boys and accompany their filming while sitting in the same exact place on the floor with her phone in hand, not being seen by any camera, nor heard by any of the high-resolution microphones.

It was always a different adventure to be there. If her mood was down, the boys' jokes made her laugh until her stomach hurt. Sometimes, she herself attributed a different fact to one of the topics that Nick brought up or gave them an idea when creativity ran out before they reached the one hour mark.

She lost count of how many times she turned on the air conditioning when Nick felt too hot or brought Matt and Chris a hoodie when they were too cold. Many times having left the studio quickly to get water or some drinks from the kitchen for one of the three when noticing their voices hoarse from thirst and the amount of minutes spent talking without a pause.

With all this being said, the brothers could say that she actively participated in the podcast and its environment without necessarily appearing in it.

So, it was no surprise that in that episode she was without her phone in hand, sitting in her usual spot, with her head practically completely covered by the hood of her hoodie and a sad look resting on her face.

Her eyes traveled between the triplets at all times, ready to jump in and console them if she noticed any tears appearing, knowing how difficult it was to finish that cycle - despite also knowing how necessary it was for their growth.

The recording was coming to an end, and Y/N felt her chest heavy, even though she was extremely happy and looking forward to the three's new individual and group projects.

Part of her scolded herself for being so emotional, maybe because she didn't feel she had the right to, since she wasn't even part of the channel. Or maybe because the boys seemed perfectly fine and happy with its ending, but she knew they were just resigned to it.

"It feels like just yesterday we started it." Chris began the ending, turning his face to Nick while playing with his microphone with his right hand. "I actually can't believe how long we've been doing this. I'm happy it's over, but I'm happy it happened."

"Oh my God... I'm happy it's over, but I'm happy it happened." Nick repeated, focusing his eyes on the ceiling for a few seconds, and Y/N was almost sure he was holding back his tears.

"That was good, right?" Chris chuckled, crossing his arms on the table and tilting his head.

"I did like it." The oldest of the triplets nodded, a thoughtful look resting on his face. "But, before we continue ending it, I think we should call a special person, who is as much a part of this podcast as we are." He brought his lips closer to his microphone, his eyes quickly meeting Y/N's. "Come here."

The girl took a deep breath, getting up from the floor and patting her pants lightly, uncreasing the slightly wrinkled fabric from her previous position.

Matt turned his head in her direction, looking at her with an almost imperceptible smile on his lips. He opened his arms, silently asking her to sit next to him, and she did.

Y/N settled down on the white and pink vintage couch, resting her back against the backrest and crossing her legs on the upholstery. Her left hand automatically found home on Matt's right thigh, stroking the covered skin lightly.

"All these months of Cut The Camera, Y/N has been with us. She literally sits on the floor, leaning against the door, right there..." Chris began, pointing his index finger towards the door, even though the camera couldn't reach the indicated space. "And listen to an hour and a few minutes of us talking about literally everything."

"She gave us ideas during some podcasts, complemented some topics with new information... In other words, she technically participated without appearing." Nick agreed with his brother, raising his index and middle fingers at each item mentioned.

"Yeah... Well, hi guys!" The girl glued her upper body against Matt's, bringing her face closer to the microphone, offering a small smile to the camera that looked back at her. "I'm sorry about my condition-"

"She was crying, I can tell." Nick interrupted her loudly, raising his right hand for a few seconds before lowering it again, receiving an eye roll from the girl in response.

"It's just..." Y/N closed her eyes momentarily, taking a deep breath before opening them again. "It's incredible to see it from my perspective. I've been in the boys' lives for a little more than 7 years, I've been accompanying them since before the Sturniolo Triplets channel began, especially since before Cut The Camera Podcast. I saw this dream born in their hearts more than two years ago..." She swallowed hard, feeling her eyes sting with new tears while clearing her throat slightly.

Matt moved his right hand up to her back, lightly caressing the covered skin before wrapping it around her waist firmly, pulling the microphone in his direction, giving her time to compose herself.

"It's true guys, she helped us build this whole studio, design it, decorate it... She had most of the ideas with Nick." The brunette pointed his head at his brother, who was watching him with his lips pressed together, nodding. "And she kept us company through the whole process."

Y/N sighed, lightly squeezing the skin of Matt's thigh still under her fingers, reassuring him that she was okay.

"Yes, exactly. But despite all that, I have no right to come and cry rivers and say words as if the world is ending. I mean, I'm not even in the channel." She let out a nasal laugh, shaking her head and fixing her eyes on the table, frowning before starting to talk again. "But I just wanted to say you guys did a great fucking job."

Her eyes lifted from the white wooden surface, traveling over Nick, who had his lips pressed into a thin line, looking at her with soft, attentive eyes; Chris, who was arranging his pink cap on his head in an act of nervousness, keeping his head low; and finally Matt, who had his eyes fixed on his own lap, without letting her see his face completely, but she knew he was listening to her words carefully.

"I'm sure that, like the Sturniolo Triplets channel, this podcast was a safe place for many people, perhaps an escape from life's problems or a moment to relax. Although you..." She quickly pointed to Nick. "Having said that many episodes didn't get you three anywhere, I'm sure they were still as important as the others for some people."

The sound of sniffing caught her attention. Y/N turned her head quickly towards her boyfriend, who still had his head down. Her eyes soon caught the small tears running down his cheeks and dripping on his blue hoodie, leaving a wet trail behind, which shone below the bright light of the expensive illumination.

The girl adjusted her posture, pulling him carefully so that her arms circled around his shoulders, hugging him close to her body. She arranged the microphone so that the support held it directly to her without her having to let go of Matt.

"I'm proud of you, boys. I know why this podcast is coming to an end, and I completely understand, just as I know they will, too..." Y/N pointed to the camera in front of her with her chin, not taking her hands off her boy for even a moment. "I know about the future plans of each of you, I helped you with some ideas, just like I just supported others, and I'm sure that all of them will give incredible results in the near future, which the entire fandom will be able to enjoy as much as they enjoy the current projects." She finished, her voice sounding weak.

She caught her bottom lip between her teeth, biting it hard in an attempt to hold back the sobs. Out of the four, Y/N was the most emotional, having been called a cry baby many times throughout her life since her crying came easily with any situation that made her heart sting.

Matt sighed, finally lifting his head and resting it against his girlfriend's one. Feeling comfort surrounded his body with Y/N's arms still securely wrapped around him, opening a small smile at the camera.

"I... I will be forever grateful for all these months, thanks to all of you." Chris's watery eyes searched Y/N's, receiving a nod in response, which gave him enough confidence to open a tearful smile.

"Goodbye campers, and good night." Nick finished slowly, as if he had been avoiding that moment during the entire 1 hour of recording. His fingers played with the support of his microphone nervously as his eyes traveled over his brothers and his best friend.

"Sleep tight. Don't let the bed bugs eat your feet." Matt brought his right cheek closer to Y/N's left one, murmuring into the microphone softly.

"Come here, lovie." Y/N whispered to Matt as soon as Nick did the small gesture he always did when they came to the end of recording.

Her arms - which were still around him - pulled him closer to her body, allowing him to lay his head on her left shoulder.

"I'm so proud of you." She sealed her lips over the brunette curls for long seconds, closing her eyes tightly as she felt his hoddie-covered shoulders tremble slightly under her grip, low sobbing sounds echoing through the pink walls.

Y/N swept her eyes around the studio, seeing Chris already standing and walking towards the stairs, his hands wiping away aggressively the thick tears that were flowing down his cheeks freely. Nick was still sitting, his arms resting on the table as he stared at the wooden surface intently, seeming to still process everything.

"It's okay, you did the right thing. Good things are coming."

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Extra - comments:

"how come we never noticed that Y/N was there in every podcast? 🤯🤯"

"omg this is so sad but so exciting at the same time, I'm looking forward to the new projects 😔"

"Y/N being the emotional support of the three of them was the cutest thing I saw today 😭😭"

"honestly, if we put together the tears of the four and all the fans who are crying right now, we could make the planet overflow 😫✋🏻"

"on no, matt crying made my heart sting so bad ;(("

"I love how Y/N is always there with them, giving the right support and being an amazing girlfriend and best friend, they're a real family 🥺🥺"

"Y/N spill some spoilers about the new projects, we beg you 😭😭"

"Y/N and Matt are so beautiful together, they're really made for each other 🥺"

liked by cutthecamerapodcast, matthew.sturniolo and 808,823 others

yninstagram you will be remembered ♡

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༻✦༺ 　༻✧༺　༻✦༺

My asks are always open. My requests are closed at the moment since I have many to work in, but you can always send questions or simply talk to me 🩷💋

And remember to treat people with kindness always!

~ taglist:

@lustfulslxt @ladybunny44 @worldlxvlys @earth2starkey @remussbitch @freshloveforthefit @il0vebeingdelulu @sturniolowhore @mimi-luvzyu @alorsxsturn @urfavgirllyyyyy @domizzzsstuff @sturnizd @hearts4chris @cupidzsq @dracoflaco @leah-loves-lilies @tylerthecreatorsrealwife @rootbeerworshiper @junnniiieee07 @elliesturniolo1 @sstvrnioloo @lightsgore @gidgett11037 @sturniolho @ksskianshd @ccolleenn @sturniolo-lover1317 @soimightlikeoldmen69 @hrtyjy @ldr-sl0t @breeloveschris @bellasfavbisexual @its-jennarose @sainzzsturns @iammattswife

(If you want to be added to the taglist, please comment here)

#chris sturniolo #matt sturniolo #nick sturniolo #sturniolo x reader #x reader #sturniolo triplets #sturniolo #fanfic #fanfiction #fic #imagine #oneshot #matt sturniolo fic #matt sturniolo x you #matt sturniolo fluff #matt sturniolo x reader #matthew bernard sturniolo #matthew sturniolo x reader #matthew sturniolo #matt x reader #matt au #matt fanfic #matt #fluff #angst #sad #cut the camera podcast #ending #matt sturniolo x yn #matt sturniolo x reader fluff

[nellasbookplanet]

Book recs: Queer science fiction, part 1

There is a lot of queer sf out there, and I read a lot of sf. When I started working on this list, I quickly realized it was impossible to include all that I've read and enjoyed in one single rec post. Thus, this is the first of so far three queer sci-fi book rec posts.

A note: queer here does not necessarily mean "guarantee of an f/f or m/m ship with a happy ending", but rather simply a significant presence of queerness. Some of the books feature no romance but has a same gender attracted/trans/a-spectrum lead, or features an m/f relationship with bisexual, trans or aro/ace characters, or simply features a world-building which is heavily queer inclusive in ways that don't always compare to our own ideas of sexuality and gender. I have however disqualified works where the only queer presence is along the lines of "gay best friend" or a blink and you'll miss it confirmation that never comes up again.

Previous book rec posts:

Really cool fantasy worldbuilding, really cool sci-fi worldbuilding, dark sapphic romances, mermaid books, vampire books, many worlds: portal fantasies, many worlds: alternate timelines, robots and artificial intelligences, post- and transhumanism, alien intelligences

For more details on the books, continue under the readmore. Titles marked with * are my personal favorites. And as always, feel free to share your own recs in the notes!

The Light Brigade by Kameron Hurley*

Dietz is a soldier in the war between Earth and Mars - to travel to the battle front, she and her fellow soldiers are broken down into light to be able to quickly travel across space. But something keeps going wrong with Dietz's travels; her memories don't match up with the mission briefs, as she experiences time itself turning in on itself. Is she going mad? Or are the things she's learning skipping through time the truth - and the war that's stealing her life the lie? A mindfuck of a book that's scathing in its critique of fascism and war. Features a sapphic lead but no romance.

A Psalm for the Wild-Built (Monk and Robot duology) by Becky Chambers

Novella. Long ago, robots, upon gaining sentience, simply laid down their work and walked into the wilderness. Long after, a tea monk looking for purpose follows after them into the wilds, where they come across one of the robots seeking its own sort of answers. While not plotless, this story focuses more on character and vibes over plot. Also has a nonbinary main character and features conversations on gender between human and robot.

Meet Me In Another Life by Catriona Silvey*

Thora and Santi are strangers, brought together by a coincidence and torn apart just as abruptly when tragedy strikes. But this is neither the first nor the last time they meet - again and again they encounter each other, as friends, lovers, enemies, family, every time recognizing in each other a familiarity no one else carries. But with every new life, a mysterious danger grows ever closer, forcing them to find out the truth of their connection. This is a puzzle-box of a story that goes some entirely unexpected places in a very wild ride, featuring a bisexual co-lead.

The Archive Undying (The Downworld Sequence) by Emma Mieko Candon

In a world where AI gods sometimes lose their minds and take entire populations down with them, Sunai was the only survivor when his god went down. In the 17 years since, he has wandered on his own, unable to either die or age, drowning his sorrows in drink and men. But his attempts to flee his past comes to a stop as he is forced back into the struggle between man and machine. Featuring some pretty wild world building and narrative techniques, this book will definitely confuse you, but it is worth the experience.

The Paradox Hotel by Rob Hart

January Cole works security at the Paradox Hotel, last stop for tourists heading for the timeport, which allows them to travel to and witness any moment in time. But years of proximity to the timeport has left its damage on January, making her unstuck in time, letting her relive memories of her dead lover even as her sanity slips away bit by bit. As she starts witnessing proof of a horrible crime in the hotel that no one else can see, January must race against her own mind, a killer, and time itself to solve it before it's too late.

A Fractured Infinity by Nathan Tavares

Hayes Figueiredo is a struggling film-maker who wants to finish his documentary, whose life gets turned upside down when handsome physicist Yusuf Hassan enters his life, claiming an alternate version of him is a great inventor who’s sent a mysterious device to their universe. As Hayes gets drawn deeper into the conspiracy - and his feelings for Yusuf intensify - he has to decide just how far he’s prepared to go to win the life and the love he wants. Featuring a very gay and very morally dubious lead, this is a creative and strange read.

Bridge by Lauren Beukes

When she was little, Bridge and her mother Jo used to play a game - one where they traveled to other worlds, inhabiting the bodies of their other selves. Now Jo is dead, and as Bridge is cleaning out her apartment she finds a strange device: a dreamworm, the very thing that supposedly makes inter-dimensional travel possible. Suddenly faced with the possibility that multiverse travel is real, Bridge is struck by a different question: could her mother still be alive? Scifi spiced with a healthy dose of body horror and some absolutely wild twists, Bridge also features a bisexual lead (however this is a blink and you’ll miss it moment) and a nonbinary co-narrator.

The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet (Wayfarers series) by Becky Chambers

Rosemary Harper just got a job on the motley crew of the Wayfarer, a spaceship that works with tunneling new wormholes through space. With a past she wants to leave behind, Rosemary is happy to travel the far reaches of the universe with the chaotic crew, but when they land the job of a life time, things suddenly get a lot more dangerous. A bit of a tumblr classic in its day, this is a cozy space opera with an episodic feel and vividly realized characters and cultures. While pretty light on romance and focusing found family, there is a main f/f relationship.

An Unkindness of Ghosts by Rivers Solomon

Life on the lower decks of the generation ship HSS Matilda is hard for Aster, an outcast even among outcasts, trying to survive in a system not dissimilar to the old antebellum South. The ship's leaders have imposed harsh restrictions on their darker skinned people, using them as an oppressed work force as they travel toward their supposed Promised Land. But as Aster finds a link between the death of the ship's sovereign and the suicide of her own mother, she realizes there may be a way off the ship.

Ninefox Gambit (The Machineries of Empire trilogy) by Yoon Ha Lee*

Military space opera where belief and culture shape the laws of reality, causing all kinds of atrocities as empires do everything in their power to force as many people as possible to conform to their way of life to strengthen their technology and weapons. It’s also very queer, with gay, lesbian and trans major characters, albeit little to no romance.

The Left Hand of Darkness (Hainish Cycle) by Ursula K. Le Guin

1969 classic. Genly Ai is an emissary sent to the planet of Winter, meant to help facilitate Winter's inclusion in a growing intergalactic civilization. But he's unprepared for Winter's citizens, who spend much of their time genderless or switching between genders, making for a culture wildly different from that Genly is used to.

Too Like the Lightning (Terra Ignota series) by Ada Palmer*

Centuries in the future, humanity has deliberatly engineered society to be as utopian as possible, politically, socially, sexually, religiously. Written in an enlightenment style and featuring questions of human nature and whether it’s possible to change it, and what price we’re prepared to pay for peace, this book is simultaneously very heavy and very funny, and written in a very unique style. While still human, the society presented often feels starkly alien.

The Stars Are Legion by Kameron Hurley

This book fucked me up when I read it. It’s weird, it’s gross, there’s So Much Viscera, there are literally no men, it has living spaceships and biotech but in the most horrific way imaginable. Had I to categorize it I would call it grimdark military sf. It’s an experience but not necessarily a pleasant one.

The Luminous Dead by Caitlin Starling*

Possibly one of the most unsettling books I’ve ever read, and definitely the most claustrophobic. Gyre, a caver on an alien planet, ventures into the dark and dangerous underground, guided only by a woman who has no compunctions on using and manipulating Gyre as she sees fit to obtain her secretive goals down in the caves.

Escaping Exodus (Escaping Exodus series) by Nicky Drayden

While my feelings on Escaping Exodus were mixed, it cannot be denied that the dynamic between the two leads and the way they go from childhood best friends to enemies on different sides of a class and power struggle is very delicious. It also features some really cool worldbuilding of living, alien generation spaceships and the human culture that has developed inside them.

The Doors of Eden by Adrian Tchaikovsky*

The Doors of Eden is something of an experiment in speculative biology, featuring versions of Earth in which various different species were the one to rise to sentience, from dinosaurs to neanderthals. Now, something is threatening the existence of all timelines, dragging multiple different people and species into the struggle, among those a pair of cryptid hunting girlfriends and a transgender scientist.

Ascension by Jacqueline Koyanagi

Ascension follows Alana Quick, an expert Sky Surgeon who stows away on a spaceship in hopes of landing herself a job. But the ship and its crew are in deeper waters than she expected, facing threats emerging from a whole other universe, all of them searching for the same person: Alana’s spiritually enlightened sister. Undeniably a bit of an odd read, Ascension is also very creative and features polyamorous lesbian relationship.

Contagion (Contagion duology) by Erin Bowman*

Young adult. After receiving an SOS, a small crew is sent on a standard search-and-rescue mission. But what they find are not survivors awaiting help, but an abandoned site, full of dead bodies and crawling with something... monstrous. No romance, but features one sapphic co-lead and one who can easily be read as demisexual (however this doesn't show up until book two, which has more romance).

A Memory Called Empire (Texicalaan duology) by Arkady Martine

Mahit Dzmare is an ambassador sent to the center of the multi-system Teixcalaanli Empire, where she discovers that her predecessor has died. Trying to protect her home, an independent mining station, from being taken over by the empire, Mahit struggles to find out the truth of her predecessor's death while carrying the voice of his ghost in her head, guiding her as best he can. Light on the romance but does feature a sapphic relationship.

The Outside (The Outside trilogy) by Ada Hoffman*

AKA the book the put me in an existenial crisis. Souls are real, and they are used to feed AI gods in this lovecraftian inspired scifi where reality is warped and artifical gods stand against real, unfathomable ones. Autistic scientist Yasira is accused of heresy and, to save her eternal soul, is recruited by post-human cybernetic ‘angels’ to help hunt down her own former mentor, who is threatening to tear reality itself apart. Sapphic main character.

Dawn (Xenogenesis trilogy) by Octavia E. Butler*

After a devestating war leaves humanity on the brink of extinction, survivor Lilith finds herself waking up naked and alone in a strange room. She’s been rescued by the Oankali, who have arrived just in time to save the human race. But there’s a price to survival, and it might be humanity itself. Absolutely fucked up I love it I once had to drop the book mid read to stare at the ceiling and exclaim in horror at what was going on. Queer in the sense that the Oankali doesn't follow human ideas of gender and relationships, which is mirrored in their romantic relationships with humans. It is, however, pretty dark, with examinations of agency and consent, so enter with caution.

Remnant by Kate Genet

One day, Cass wakes up and finds everyone else is gone. Not dead, just gone, leaving her in a world which nature starts taking back with a dangerous, unnatural speed. But as she tries to survive this new normal, Cass realizes she may not be alone after all - but who else is out there, and are they a threat?

The Scorpion Rules (Prisoners of Peace duology) by Erin Bow*

Young Adult. Featuring a dystopian future in which an AI forcibly keeps world peace by holding the children of world leaders hostage. If anyone attempts to start a war, their child will be executed. Greta is one of these children, kept in a school with others like her. But things start to change one day when a new, less obedient hostage arrives. A unique, slowburn take on the YA dystopian craze, also featuring a bisexual love triangle.

Iron Widow (Iron Widow series) by Xiran Jay Zhao

Young adult. Zetian is a citizen of Huaxia, where mecha aliens are constantly trying to breach the Great Wall. To keep them at bay, couples of men and women pilot so called Chrysalises, giant transforming robots. But the pilots are not equal - the women almost always die, sucked dry by their co-pilots. When Zetian sets herself up to become a concubine-pilot, she does so with the plan to assassinate the male pilot who caused her sister's death. Features a polyamorous main relationship.

Bonus AKA I haven't read these yet but they seem really cool:

Survival Instincts by May Dawney

Lynn Tanner has been surviving the post-apocalypse alone with only her dog for a long time, trusting no one. But when she's forced to travel the dangerous remains of New York City alongside another woman, her priorities are challenged. Is staying alone really the best way to stay alive?

These Burning Stars by Bethany Jacobs

When con-artist Jun Ironway gets her hands on possible proof of the powerful Nightfoot family, controllers of interplanetary travel, committing genocide, she has in her hands a chance of taking them and their monopoly down. But the family and their allies won't go down easily, and sends two brutal clerics to stop her.

Everfair by Nisi Shawl

A neo-victorian alternate history, in which a part of Congo was kept safe from colonisation, becoming Everfair, a safe haven for both the people of Congo and former slaves returning from America. Here they must struggle to keep this home safe for them all.

#nella talks books #the light brigade #a psalm for the wild built #meet me in another life #the archive undying #the paradox hotel #fracture infinity #bridge #the long way to a small angry planet #an unkindness of ghosts #ninefox gambit #the left hand of darkness #terra ignota #the stars are legion #the luminous dead #escaping exodus #the doors of eden #the outside #xenogenesis #remnant #the scorpion rules #iron widow #survival instincts #these burning stars #everfair

[nasa]

Why Isn’t Every Year the Warmest Year on Record?

This just in: 2022 effectively tied for the fifth warmest year since 1880, when our record starts. Here at NASA, we work with our partners at NOAA to track temperatures across Earth’s entire surface, to keep a global record of how our planet is changing.

Overall, Earth is getting hotter.

The warming comes directly from human activities – specifically, the release of greenhouse gases like carbon dioxide from burning fossil fuels. We started burning fossil fuels in earnest during the Industrial Revolution. Activities like driving cars and operating factories continue to release greenhouse gases into our atmosphere, where they trap heat in the atmosphere.

So…if we’re causing Earth to warm, why isn’t every year the hottest year on record?

As 2022 shows, the current global warming isn’t uniform. Every single year isn’t necessarily warmer than every previous year, but it is generally warmer than most of the preceding years. There’s a warming trend.

Earth is a really complex system, with various climate patterns, solar activity, and events like volcanic eruptions that can tip things slightly warmer or cooler.

Climate Patterns

While 2021 and 2022 continued a global trend of warming, they were both a little cooler than 2020, largely because of a natural phenomenon known as La Niña.

La Niña is one third of a climate phenomenon called El Niño Southern Oscillation, also known as ENSO, which can have significant effects around the globe. During La Niña years, ocean temperatures in the central and eastern Pacific Ocean cool off slightly. La Niña’s twin, El Niño brings warmer temperatures to the central and eastern Pacific. Neutral years bring ocean temperatures in the region closer to the average.

El Niño and La Niña affect more than ocean temperatures – they can bring changes to rainfall patterns, hurricane frequency, and global average temperature.

We’ve been in a La Niña mode the last three, which has slightly cooled global temperatures. That’s one big reason 2021 and 2022 were cooler than 2020 – which was an El Niño year.

Overall warming is still happening. Current El Niño years are warmer than previous El Niño years, and the same goes for La Niña years. In fact, enough overall warming has occurred that most current La Niña years are warmer than most previous El Niño years. This year was the warmest La Niña year on record.

Solar Activity

Our Sun cycles through periods of more and less activity, on a schedule of about every 11 years. Here on Earth, we might receive slightly less energy — heat — from the Sun during quieter periods and slightly more during active periods.

At NASA, we work with NOAA to track the solar cycle. We kicked off a new one – Solar Cycle 25 – after solar minimum in December 2019. Since then, solar activity has been slightly ramping up.

Because we closely track solar activity, we know that over the past several decades, solar activity hasn't been on the rise, while greenhouse gases have. More importantly, the "fingerprints" we see on the climate, including temperature changes in the upper atmosphere, don't fit the what we'd expect from solar-caused warming. Rather they look like what we expect from increased greenhouse warming, verifying a prediction made decades ago by NASA.

Volcanic Eruptions

Throughout history, volcanoes have driven major shifts in Earth’s climate. Large eruptions can release water vapor — a greenhouse gas like carbon dioxide — which traps additional warmth within our atmosphere.

On the flip side, eruptions that loft lots of ash and soot into the atmosphere can temporarily cool the climate slightly, by reflecting some sunlight back into space.

Like solar activity, we can monitor volcanic eruptions and tease out their effect on variations in our global temperature.

At the End of the Day, It’s Us

Our satellites, airborne missions, and measurements from the ground give us a comprehensive picture of what’s happening on Earth every day. We also have computer models that can skillfully recreate Earth’s climate.

By combining the two, we can see what would happen to global temperature if all the changes were caused by natural forces, like volcanic eruptions or ENSO. By looking at the fingerprints each of these climate drivers leave in our models, it’s perfectly clear: The current global warming we’re experiencing is caused by humans.

For more information about climate change, visit climate.nasa.gov.

Make sure to follow us on Tumblr for your regular dose of space!

#Earth #climate change #space #home #NASA #climate #Planet Earth #planet #environment

[cassafrasscr]

I continue to have so many thoughts about Ashton.

I've seen a handful of posts accusing Ashton of being selfish and power-hungry, and I don't think that's completely inaccurate, per se. I don't think it's fair to frame it as Ashton just wanting power for it's own sake without considering the larger context of the threat they're facing.

Let's look back on the Hells' first battle with Otohan.

Ashton was almost completely useless in that fight. He got knocked out twice in the space of a few rounds. Which, no shade. With her Echoes in play, Otohan was almost able kill Keyleth (a level 20 Archdruid, plus her elemental Wildshape) in a single round.

Ashton's whole job is to tank hits and deal damage. With an enemy that can deal out enough damage in one round to put the tank out of commission, his ability to mitigate damage to the rest of the party is severely hampered (if not cancelled out completely).

The only reason Ashton didn't also die in that fight is that his friends healed them enough that they could get back up again, and they were able to make a run for it before Otohan started going back to kill the PCs she had already knocked out.

And that was just Otohan. One of Ludinus' right hand generals, sure, but still nowhere near as strong as Ludinus himself (or even Predathos, if it gets released). Even once they defeat Otohan, the fight that's still in store for Bell's Hells is near insurmountable.

Taliesin has said in a previous 4SD (don't remember which one, sorry) that this fight was the moment that Ashton realized just how invested with this new group they had become. The moment he couldn't protect his friends was the moment he realized that he finally had the family he'd been missing... and by then three of them (Orym, Laudna, and Fearne - probably the PCs Ash was closest to at the time) were dead.

Not only could Ashton not protect his friends, he also ran. He left his friends behind and half of them ended up getting killed. I think Ashton may feel they left their friends for dead in that moment, the same way the Nobodies left him for dead after the Hexum Heist.

Now, I'm not sure I would necessarily equivocate these two situations - this is just where I think Ashton's head might be given recent events. I don't think he would see any significant difference between the Nobodies leaving him after his fall, and him running for his life during the Otohan fight. If I'm remembering correctly, this is also around the time that Ashton really started to double down on their "Nobody gets left behind" rule.

Now that Ash is aware of how much he cares about the other Hells, he will do absolutely anything to keep them. Bell's Hells is too invested in the fight against Ludinus to turn back, and Ashton is never going to leave them again. So if the Hells won't abandon the fight, and Ash won't abandon the Hells, their only option is to get strong enough to keep their friends safe.

So of course Ashton took the Shard of Rau'shan when Fearne didn't want it. No one else seemed able or willing to take it, so Ashton charged ahead with his decision the way he tends to do.

Was it arrogant and hubristic? YES. Was it a power-hungry thing to do? YES. Was it wrong to keep it secret from the rest of the group? YES. But there's not a single force in Exandria that will make Ashton regret taking that shard if it helps him protect his friends even a little bit.

It also feels fitting to me that one of the few things Ashton can't protect them from is his own poor decision making.

#also i think ashton wildly overestimated his ability to survive absorbing the shard #he's already survived so many things that should have killed them #he was told multiple times before this that it was a miracle he was anywhere near functional #why not throw more nonsense into the mix? #i will be chewing on this genasi forever #ashton greymoore #cr3 #cr3 e77 #critical role spoilers #meta #long post #critical role #i have so many thoughts about ashton

[queenshelby]

Chemical Reactions (P. 6)

Pairing: Cillian Murphy as J Robert Oppenheimer x Student Reader

Warning: Smut, Age-Gap, Infidelity

Words: 4,905

Note: The fic is spoiler free and my own fantasy and imagination. It is not historically and scientifically accurate.

Previous Parts: 1; 2; 3; 4; 5

“You really want to have this discussion now?” you sighed before reaching for the packet of cigarettes which you kept on the ledge of your chalkboard while leaning back against it. You were still half naked and your bare breasts were exposed.

“Considering the circumstances, I think that we must talk about it now. I understand if you would rather save yourself for someone who…” Robert began to say as you handed him your cigarette and before you interrupting him.

“Listen Robert, the fact that you are married doesn’t bother me and, clearly, it doesn’t bother you either as, otherwise, you wouldn’t have kissed me” you said before snatching the cigarette from his hand again, causing Robert to furrow his eyebrows.

“Now that, too, is presumptuous” he ought to point out in respect of which you laughed.

“Is it though?” you chuckled before expanding on the topic of fidelity. “I suppose your reputation precedes you. Despite, I know about Jean Tatlock and your affair with Ruth Tolman” you told him, causing Robert’s chin to drop. He sighed again and then he asked “how did you know?” to which, of course, you had already formulated a response in the back of your head.

“Women talk. Barbara Chevalier and Ruth Tolman are friends and I have overheard a few conversations between them since living here” you admitted to Robert before handing the cigarette back to him.

“Well, for the record, my affairs with these women are in the past. I have ended them both” Robert explained before inhaling the smoke of the cigarette without realising that, for you, the fact that he had ended those affairs, did not make a difference.

“Dr Oppenheimer, with respect, none of this really concerns me. I am not your wife” you chuckled, causing Robert’s eyes to widen. He was surprised by your attitude towards this topic and now regretted the fact that he had spoken up about it before he even had the chance to be with you, at least that once.

“I suppose we have officially passed the need for formalities, don’t you think?” Robert asked. “So please, call me Robert” he then said and you took him up on his offer while still standing there with the fabric of your dress stacked up over your hips and your bare nipples pointing right at him.

“Alright, Robert” you said before giving him a cheeky smile. “Now, let me tell you something about myself” you then told him and, sure enough, he was keen to hear about your thoughts on the current situation.

“I am a woman who does not believe in love or marriage, both of which are social conventions invented by human kind without any scientific backing whatsoever. In my opinion, questions concerning marital fidelity are minuscule in today’s society where one race is trying very hard to destroy another. We have bigger issues to worry about than our own emotions” you began to explain before snatching the cigarette from Robert’s hands again and continuing with your explanation. “What I do, however, believe in is physical and intellectual attraction giving rise to a connection between two people. I believe that we have such connection but, if you do not feel the same way, then perhaps you are right and this should stop now” you then said before disposing of the fag and stepping towards Robert again who looked both, stunned and confused.

“I haven’t met anyone quite like you and I am astonished by how mature you are at such a young age” he said in an almost whispering voice while caressing your face again gently. He was looking at you with desire and need again before, somewhat expectedly, pressing his lips onto yours for a split second before you pulled away from him once more.

“Unfortunatly maturity doesn’t necessarily translate to experience, as you will soon find out” you blushed, causing Robert to look at you in awe.

“I am sure you will do just fine” he teased, causing you to chuckle and roll your eyes all at the same time before you reached up and pulled his mouth to yours again.

The touch of his warm lips brushing against yours caused a thrill of excitement to rush through you. Robert’s kiss was soft, gentle, and then became more urgent as you opened your mouth to accept his tongue. Even though this was not your first kiss, you almost felt as if it was. This would be a night of firsts for both of you and your heart pounded so hard it hurt as you kissed him back fervently

“Come on” Robert then whispered after pulling away from you and guiding you towards the bed, which is when you quickly shuffled your dress down over your hips and disposed of it on the floor.

“Robert?” you then said with a husky voice before laying down on your back and looking up at him nervously as he disposed of the rest of his clothes as well, expect for his briefs.

“Yes? What is it?” he asked before joining you and hovering over you while caressing your face gently. He looked at you in awe and his eyes were reassuring.

“Take it slow, please” you whispered nervously before reaching up to run your hands through his hair.

“Of course. That goes without saying” Robert reassured you before he kissed you again and, this time around, he was deepening and lengthening the kiss, showing you just how much he wanted and desired you.

As you were kissing passionately, his hands reached around to caress you, causing your mostly naked bodies to rub against each other. Your bare breasts were now trapped against his chest and the feel of his warm body atop of yours caused shivers run down your spine.

Coming up to breathe, Robert eventually pulled away from you a little and, when he did, the tingling sensation he left behind on your lips made you smile.

Robert returned the smile you gave him and the smile that crossed his face warmed your trembling limbs and hid your excited nervousness. Despite the fact that you wanted this man more than anyone you had ever known, you felt somehow unstable when finally being faced with the idea of being intimate with someone else for the first time in your life.

The bravado you usually wore like a shield around him seemed to desert you, and even though you he couldn’t see much more than your face in this position, you felt naked under Robert’s heated gaze. You suddenly worried about your inexperience and you wondered whether this was actually a good idea.

Robert saw the panic of insecurity rise in your eyes, and he reached out to gently push a stray strand of hair behind your ear and grazed your bottom lip with his thumb before bringing his mouth to yours again. It was a slow kiss, deepening as his desire built even further. He knew he needed to go slow with you, take you gently and he hoped he could.

A hot rush travelled through your body as you responded to his kiss and felt his body shift, now enabling to graze his hands over your breasts.

“You are so beautiful” Robert then whispered before allowing not only his hands, but also his lips, to travel and you gasped as, eventually, you felt him nuzzle into your neck and trace your collarbone with his lips.

“That feels nice” you acknowledged as Robert was trailing his fingers over your skin and then you even moaned somewhat inadvertently when he brushed his fingers across your nipples. They surged under his caress and sent piercing streaks of arousal to your core. His caress was like a hot spark, and his touch excited you like you had not believed possible. You did not know how you could withstand his hands on the naked skin of your breasts for long but you knew that you had to try.

As Robert gazed over your naked flesh, you felt a blush creep up your neck. His eyes were so dark and full of lust, unlike anything else you had ever seen before and, just when Robert noticed your nervousness again, he pulled his hands away slightly, giving you some more time.

“Am I moving too fast?” he asked but you shook your head.

"No!” you groaned. “Touch me and kiss me again, please" you begged and you hoped that your voice would sound strong and self-assured. Unfortunately, you could not pull it off, and it shook with pure anxiety.

"As you wish” Robert chuckled before finally cupping one of your breasts and leaning down to slowly and gently swipe his tongue across one hard nipple.

"Oh my god" you whimpered as Robert teased the hard, little bud with his lips and rolled the other stiff nipple between two fingers.

“God, huh?” Robert teased. “I never expected to ever hear this word coming from your mouth…how unscientific of you…” he then joked just as you watched him lean over you.

“Just shut up and keep doing whatever you were doing to me. I am begging you, Robert” you joked for a moment while trying to pull his lips closer to your breasts again, which is when he took your thus-far neglected nipple into his warm mouth. He licked and sucked, alternating between the two stiff peaks, until you trembled and gasped on the edge of something you had never experienced before.

“Fuck, Robert” You felt feverish with excitement. Your mouth was dry, but your body was more alive than it had ever been before. Without him having even touched your mound, it was wet, yet felt as if it was on fire and throbbing with need. Shivers of anticipation shot up your spine, and you sucked your breath in raggedly as Robert dragged his insistent tongue down, letting it trail over your belly and to your navel.

“So perfect” Robert then murmured against your skin as he took his time exploring your body, trailing his fingers and mouth over your belly and thighs, before running them teasingly over the lace of your panties, making you moan loudly.

“Jesus Christ” you cursed, moaned and groaned in pleasure, causing Robert to look up at you and furrow his eyebrows.

“Don’t stop” you demanded as he was looking at you now with a cheeky smile having formed across his face and you tried to squirm up against him to simply gain some friction.

"I won’t, but I want to see all of you before I continue” Robert then said as his voice was thick with longing.

“Okay” you murmured in response, sounding desperate and anxious all at the same time. Your panties were moist, evidence of your excitement, and you were certain that he could smell your arousal as you hooked your thumbs inside the waistband of the lacy panties and wriggled out of them. You felt exposed, vulnerable, but also incredibly excited by the expression on his face, as he watched you offer your body to him. His expression showed eagerness, pleasure and even greed, you thought. There was no sign of the trepidation you had expected to see there.

“Now you” you then winked and, without taking his gaze from you, Robert stripped his briefs off quickly, throwing them to the side of the bed.

When you saw his erection, your breath caught in your throat. This was the first time you looked at a man’s most intimate body part, and in your virgin mind, it appeared impossibly thick and long. Your mound throbbed at the sight of it, but your stomach churned in repressed fear.

Eventually, you decided to proceed and Robert’s hands moved slowly and tenderly over your body again, pushing the anxiety from your mind as they wandered over your contours and cupped your mound gently. You groaned softly as his fingers caressed the lips, wet with your arousal, and then slid between their moistness into the entrance of your pussy.

"You are so wet” Robert then said as he buried his face against your neck while probing your entrance some more.

“Uh huh” you moaned in response as you moved your pelvis in time with his probing fingers. They were curious and insistent and were creating marvellous sensations in your core.

“Oh god Robert. This feels so nice” you eventually groaned as you spread your legs wider but your voice faded as Robert took immediate advantage of your pleasure, dipping his finger deeper inside your wetness. Your hips jerked suddenly at the unfamiliar sensation of being penetrated.

"I am sorry. I will go slow" Robert said, realising that this was too quick and too soon for you and, just as he let his thumb circle and caress the hood of your swollen clit, he could feel the heavy beating of your heart. Its rhythm matched his own, but the throbbing in his groin was wilder than he could remember.

“This feels incredible” you spoke with laboured breath and took every ounce of Robert’s willpower to restrain himself and not plough into you immediately. The scent of your mound was driving him wild, and it looked so good. All soft, swollen and slick with your excitement. It was the most welcoming sight he had seen in a long time.

“I want to taste you. May I?” Robert then whispered and your eyes widened. You knew what this meant and the thought of it alone aroused you incredibly.

“Yes” you thus moaned and, unable to restrain his need to taste your properly, Robert kissed down your body again so that he could let his tongue slide through your glistening labia and taste your delicious essence as his lips sought out your fleshy clit.

"Oh, fuck! Robert. Oh my god!” you moaned, squirming under his mouth. Your nails dug into his scalp to hold him there. You did not want him to ever stop. His tongue was creating sensations in you that you had never experienced before. Masturbation had always been good for you. You knew how to use your fingers expertly to bring yourself to climax, but this was different. It was warmer, wetter and more teasing, with an intense build up that made you want to thrash around and cry out in pleasure and frustration. You rocked your pelvis against his mouth, your inhibitions fading into the background of the sensations he gave you. You moved with him, demanding more as he licked and explored you.

Eventually, a squeal of pure pleasure tore from your lips as your spasms started deep inside. You trembled and gasped at the sensations that raced through your body exploded in a wave of pleasure that radiated back throughout your body again. As the waves of sensation crossed each other, you swore you would pass out. You held on to the here and now, enjoying the wild ride, and when you opened your eyes at last, you found Robert smiling at you.

"Fuck Robert, that was amazing. I had no idea! Is that how it feels for you? I mean, would it work the same way if I did this to you?" you asked, boldly reaching out to caress the rigid cock pressed into your side, eager at the thought of giving him the same pleasure he had just given you. It was hot and hard in your hands, and a small trickle of precum dribbled from the darkly coloured tip.

“Properly” Robert acknowledged and you moved to a better position and bent your head to tentatively stroke the velvety shaft against the side of your soft cheek, before dragging the tip of your tongue over the crown. Very gently, you drew it into your mouth and sucked slowly, lovingly, savouring his meaty thickness. You were surprised by your own enjoyment of this. You had never even contemplated it before.

"Fuck, I won't be able to hold out for too long, if you do that for much longer” Robert groaned after fifteen minutes or so as he watched you latch your soft lips onto his throbbing hardness. You moaned, overcome with the sensation of having him in your mouth and the taste of his excitement.

"Then don't. Cum in my mouth. I am curious about what it tastes like” you said quite honestly after lifting your lips from his cock and looking up at him through hooded lids that only served to stoke the fire of his desire to even higher levels.

"No. I don’t want to cum. Not yet" Robert groaned nonetheless before he gently pulled you from his cock before pushing you back onto your back playfully. "The first time I cum tonight will be inside of you" he then grimaced and a rush of adrenaline shot through you as he moved between your thighs.

“If this is still what you want…” Robert then ought to confirm and you nodded eagerly.

“Yes. It is what I want Robert. I want to feel you inside of me” you told him just as you felt the heat coming off his body when he nudged himself against the moist outer lips of your pussy. You spread your legs, and he rubbed the head of his cock over your slickness. He hesitated for a second before, eventually, leaning forward and supporting himself with his arms.

He then pressed ahead, pushing himself into you slowly and carefully while looking for cues of any discomfort on your face. His attention was focused on the warm, wet feeling of your lips surrounding his cock. They opened slowly to him, and he slowly pushed himself into the velvety depths of you with a pleasurable groan. He hadn't been sure if he had been expecting the barrier of a hymen, given the fact that you admitted that you masturbated, but there was only a small amount of resistance to overcome as he continued to push into you with slow, gentle thrusts.

“Robert! Fuck!” you moaned eventually while digging your nails into his arms and shoulders. Your voice was tremulous and shaky as he filled you and stretched you beyond what you had known.

Hearing your tremulous moan, Robert thrust forward sharply now and groaned as he slid all the way up inside you. You winced and bit the inside of your cheek to stop yourself from crying out. Your breathing was fast and shallow as your channel opened and stretched to take all of him. Despite the soreness and feeling of being overfull, it was a wondrous moment for you, finally knowing what it felt like to have a man buried inside you.

"You are so incredibly tight” Robert gasped at the snugness of you, barely holding onto his self-control. Now that he was in deeper, surrounded by your wetness, he was careful not to move, to let your get used to the feel of him inside you. It almost killed him not to plunge repeatedly into your pussy. His cock felt harder than it ever had and your cries of pleasure, knowing no one had ever made your feel like this, made him feel more virile, more potent than he ever had.

"You don't have to hold back Robert" you breathed into his neck as you clung to him. You wrapped your legs around his hips and raked your nails down his back as he sunk deeper into you. The eyes looking down at you were tinged with concern and fire, but you wanted his desire, his passion, to feel beautiful in his arms. You wanted him to make love to you, but you also wanted him to fuck you. You wanted to experience everything you had heard others talk about over so many years, all at once, even though you knew it was unfair to expect so much from this one man alone.

He moved his hips slowly, sliding his cock back and forth inside you, letting your get used to the rhythm. You moved with him, intuitively pushing your pelvis upwards as he slid into you. Each time he buried himself inside of you, your clit was trapped against the upper side of his shaft. You moaned loudly at the exquisite sensations and ground your mound up against him even harder, pumping back faster, until the sounds of your bodies slapping against each other and the squelching sound of their passionate fucking sent a wave of need and pure lust through him.

"Oh god. Keep going" you gasped, licking his neck and biting at his shoulders. "Don't hold back. Please, I need you to take me” you gasped again, unbelieving that you had said the words that chased around your brain out loud. You felt confident now. You felt safe. And you most certainly felt incredible.

Your words caused the blood to rush through Robert’s veins. He stared into your desire-filled gaze but, when his eyes locked with yours, a deeper connection hit him with more force than he had ever known with another woman before.

"Y/N. Oh god. I want you so fucking much” Robert groaned and since he didn’t usually swear or use the name of the holy lord, his very own words surprised him. Your name tore from his lips as he plundered your body, changing positions twice, before finding himself atop of you again.

His tongue drove into your mouth, sweeping inside, tasting, commanding, and taking what he needed. He could no longer restrain himself and he let himself go, fucking you the way he had wanted to ever since you had appeared in his life. With a growl of pure lust, he pumped his hips, plunging into you over and over. He could not get deep enough.

"Oh god, Robert. Take me” you moaned over and over again as he drove into you. Your body arched and undulated under his fevered lovemaking. The muscles of your channel clenched and spasmed around his length as a great bubble of pleasure rose up from your toes, engulfed you and burst into shards of explosive release that had you shuddering and sobbing.

"Let go for me Y/N” Robert groaned while he pinched your nipples, and you cried out again.

Your face and torso were flushed, your breath raspy, as you writhed beneath him and clawed at him while your body peaked again. You then cried out once more, and he lost it. A roar exploded from him as his body crested and he toppled over the edge. His length throbbed and pulsed, spilling his anguish and a steady stream of cum into you. He collapsed on you gasping, trying to regain his breath.

"Don't move, please" you said, your face still flushed with your excitement. You stroked his hair lovingly. "I like the way you feel inside me” you said while enjoying the little ebbing ripples from your tight walls against his cock. He smiled and kissed your lips softly and you continued this for a while until, eventually, he pulled out of you which caused some of your combined juices to leak from your slit and on to the sheets.

“So how did I do, Robert? Just fine?” you then asked just as Robert rolled to his side, facing you and caressing your face while you thought about this incredible explosive feeling he made you experience just moments ago.

“I actually cannot recall the last time I had sex that good” he gasped. His breath was still laboured as he looked at you and smiled.

“I am sure you say this to everyone” you joked after pressing a quick kiss on to Robert’s lips and before sitting up straight when, suddenly, it hit you and you came up with an idea.

“No, actually, I don’t” Robert said as he watched you get out of bed abruptly. “What are you doing?” he thus asked while you tippy toed across the room before standing right in front of the chalkboard in order to ask him a question.

“Have you figured how to get your hands on enough uranium yet? Because, going by my estimates, I believe that the US will never be able to secure enough for more than one bomb unless they work with their allies?” you then said somewhat suddenly, causing Robert to sit up as well and furrow his eyebrows.

“You know I cannot talk about this Y//N” he told you as you picked up the chalk and began to write down a formula.

“Alright, you don’t have to tell me anything. I do the talking and you take away what you want from it” you said as, still in your naked form, you wrote down a few calculations from your head.

“Y/N, your calculations don’t make sense…” Robert interrupted you until he realised that you were talking about two entirely different substances now.

“We aren’t talking about uranium anymore, are we?” he thus ought to clarify, causing you to chuckle.

“Well, you aren’t talking at all Robert. You can’t tell me anything, remember?” you teased before telling him that it was plutonium which you based your calculations on rather than uranium.

“Plutonium is too fragile” Robert pointed out which is when you dropped the chalk back on to the ledge of the board and shrugged your shoulders.

“Yes it is fragile, but it is powerful and you can extract more” you pointed out while, elegantly, crawling back into bed.

“It’s impractical nonetheless. It will be much more difficult to build a bomb using plutonium” Robert said while sill glancing at your calculations.

“Probably, which is why you need a bunch of people as smart as you are to figure out a way to make it work” you told him, causing Robert to pull you atop of him and kiss you again.

“There is something incredibly sexy about watching you calculate a reaction, completely naked, while talking to me about atoms” he then determined, earning him yet another quiet chuckle.

“If you say so” you teased while giving in to his many kisses and caresses.

“How do you feel about moving to the dessert with me?” Robert then wanted to know, causing you to pull away from him.

“You want me to come on to the project with you?” you asked somewhat surprised seeing that you were not even a postgrad student yet which, in your mind, made you unqualified.

“Yes. In fact, I think I need you” Robert told you nonetheless and with a great sense of determination, causing you to shake your head.

“You don’t need me Robert” you chuckled, seeing that he probably already had a group of well-known scientists on board, none of whom you could compete with.  

“But I do need you and it would just be you and me, working together during the day and then doing this at night” Robert responded to your statement while gently running his hands over your bare skin again in a suggestive kind of manner.

“Just you and me, huh?” you moaned before pushing Robert’s hand out of the way. “What about your wife?” you wanted to know, seeing that, no doubt, she would be there too.

“She has no desire to live in the middle of nowhere for a year or two, because this is how long it will take to make this bomb. She is not coming” Robert informed you while caressing your skin again, teasing you and making you ache with need and desire for him.

“Robert…” you gasped before his lips silenced you gently, kissing you passionately.

“Just think about it” he then told you after your lips drifted apart, causing you to nod.

“I will think about it and, maybe, there is a way you could make this proposal a little more appealing to me” you suggested just before you pushed Robert beneath you and assumed authority over him.

“How?” he asked while feeling your hand gently wrap around his hardening shaft.

“Well, for starters, you could fuck me again” you teased while stroking him.

“Right now?” Robert groaned while, again, you lined the head of his hard member up with your entrance, causing you to nod.

“Yes, right fucking now” you determined before sinking down on his cock, engulfing him completely, which was something you continued for a quite some time.

In fact, you made love for what felt like hours, up until one or two o’clock at night, following which Robert stayed with you, sharing a bed just like any other ordinary couple would until, suddenly, at 6 o’clock in the morning, you were startled by the arrival of someone unexpected, barging into your room.

To be continued…

Please comment and engage. I love getting comments and predictions pretty please!

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#cillian murphy #cillian murphy fanfic #cillian murphy fanfiction #cillian murphy smut #cillian murphy x reader #cillian murphy imagine #Oppenheimer #oppenheimer x reader #j robert oppenheimer #j robert oppenheimer x reader #oppenheimer x y/n #oppenheimer x you #j robert oppenheimer x you #manhatten project #robert oppenheimer #cillian murphy x you #cillian murphy x y/n

[spaceshipellie]

hi! how r you,, hope you are well~ 🫧

i js wanna req smt for the tlou x ethel cain requests! i was thinking req abt ellie x reader with the lyrics : "show me how much I mean to you, while I'm lying in these sheets undressed" with fluff n smut 🤍

maybe smt along the lines of reader n ellie's first time and ellie just wants to make it super meaningful~

thank you!

“show me how much i mean to you, while i’m lying in these sheets undressed”

pairing: ellie x reader

summary/warnings: your first time with ellie, fluffy smut, eating out + fingering (r receiving), modern au, 18+ mdni

hii i’m good ty hope you are too! i really enjoyed writing this slower, more romantic smut so tysm for the request!

her lips were so soft as she kissed down your neck. you were lying back on her bed, the dim room illuminated with candles and the soft pink glow of a salt lamp. the handmade bouquet of your favourite flowers ellie had gifted you sat in a vase on the dresser.

her hand danced down your body, gently gripping and touching every part of you she could. she hadn’t necessarily been nervous about your first time together but she was hell-bent on making it special and meaningful for you.

her hand travelled back up your body until she cupped your boob. she gave it some gentle squeezes before slowly gliding the strap of your top down over your shoulder. moving her head from the other side of your neck she started leaving kisses on the skin she was slowly exposing until it was pulled down far enough to expose your nipple. she took it in her mouth, swirling her tongue around and your back arched into her. her other arm slid further underneath you to hold you close as she sucked and licked at your sensitive skin. she pulled the top down even further to give your other boob the same attention before looking up at you through her eyelashes, enjoying how your lips were already parted.

she pushed your top up now, fingertips leaving goosebumps on your skin as they went, and pulled it off over your head. she left kisses in a line down your body until she reached the top of your jeans.

“can i take these off?” she hummed against your skin, her fingers ghosting over the zipper.

“yes,” you nodded and she eased them down until they were discarded on the floor.

she hummed in delight at the sight of your pretty (carefully selected) underwear which had a growing wet spot precisely where she couldn’t wait to get her tongue. she parted your thighs further, sensing that you were a bit shy to be seen like this.

“you look so pretty like this,” she said, kissing your thigh.

a tiny whimper escaped from you as she continued caressing your body with her hands and leaving kisses until she placed one directly on that wet spot. your hips squirmed, making her smile to herself before she hooked her fingers in your underwear.

“this okay?”

she waited until you nodded before peeling them down your legs.

“fuck,” she groaned.

she parted you slightly before laying her tongue flat and licking all the way up from your soaking wet hole to your clit. you moaned and wrapped your fingers tightly around the bedsheet. she was already feeling a bit pussy drunk just from one taste as she devoured you like you were her last meal. your cries got louder which only encouraged her more, making a mental note of what seemed to make you squirm and whine the most. her hands held your hips in place as she brought you closer to your orgasm, your sweet cum dripping on her tongue.

her eyelids were heavy as she moved back on top of you, catching your lips in a hungry kiss. tasting yourself on her tongue made you whine into her mouth. her hands resumed their previous position of one underneath you, holding you close and the other snaking it’s way down your body until she started rubbing circles on your clit. you gasped into her mouth as her fingers dipped lower and two slipped deep inside you. she kept kissing you as she pumped them in and out.

“tell me if it feels good, baby? wanna make sure,” she asked, kissing your neck again.

“it feels so good, ellie. fuck,” you choked out, your hand scratching at her back.

“good.”

her thumb pressed circles on your clit, her fingers squelching around inside of you, bringing you closer and closer to another release. your back arched and your head dug into the pillow as you came and she slowly slipped out of you. she licked her fingers, smiling down at you and kissed you before you could get all shy on her. this definitely wasn’t the end of your night.

#tlou x cain requests 🌙 #anon requests 🌷 #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams x y/n #ellie williams smut #ellie x reader #ellie williams #ellie williams oneshot #ellie williams blurb #ellie williams x you #ellie williams fluff

[qqueenofhades]

It's definitely a refusal to engage with or truly understand politics. I'm 24, I was in middle school during Obama's second term and 17 in 2016, and I feel like a lot of my peers just continue to be appalled at how bad things have gotten with the Republicans and why Democrats can't do anything to stop it. What's missing from their understanding is how long it took for the Republicans to get here. It didn't start in 2016. They worked for decades to do all the nightmarish shit they're doing now, and Democrats just haven't been able to do the same (because people refuse to vote consistently and give them the power to do those things). I feel like that's where the "both sides are the same" bullshit comes from - the idea that if the Dems wanted to stop the GOP, they would. It's a fundamental misunderstanding of how anything works, and often relies on downplaying how bad the Republicans actually are in order to support their 'Dems are just as bad' stance.

Things did get catastrophically worse when Trump was elected, and he broke things way more than they ever had been, but he doesn't exist in a vacuum and it took the Republicans a lot of fucking work for him to do what he did. The only way the Dems can counteract that is by having a party of people willing to put in a similar level of work, and that requires understanding our structures and how things work (executive orders are only temporary fixes and actual legislation takes time, compromise, and work), and a lot of these people just aren't willing to do it.

The thing is, yes, I absolutely do get the feeling that everything is terrible and we are doomed. I went through it when GWB was re-elected in 2004 and then again in 2008, worrying about whether Obama would get elected and end that particular run of Republican-induced misery (when John McCain looks like a fucking saint compared to the GOP candidates we are being offered now), and obviously plumbed the depths of despair in 2016 with Trump. But I don't remember ever thinking that I should just give up trying, stop voting, or any of that, and I don't think it was because I was some kind of special person who was just so tenacious. I obviously have not been a teenager in the present era and yes, that means I have different views on things from the next generation, but also: this has always happened. Moments of total political despair and feeling that everything is fucked are also not a new thing. We are going through it with Trumpism, the previous generation went through it with Reagan/Thatcher, the previous previous generation went through it with Nixon/Vietnam, the previous etc generation went through it with the Cold War, the previous etc. etc. generation went through it with World War II -- and so forth. There has never been any one point when everything was great and there was no work left to be done, because, y'know. That is not how either history or human nature works.

Hence, that is why I'm trying to figure out what in the fuck is going on right now, and whether it's just social media that have made things so bad (entirely possible). Critical thinking is a shambles, yes, but that's not necessarily something young people have chosen for themselves. The current world is a late-stage capitalist dystopia run by four or five trillionaire oligarch cartels and corporations, and obviously public education, basic civic responsibility, the teaching of any "controversial" history, and everything else that might threaten that setup has been systematically and methodically dismantled, politicized, or so infiltrated with false information that it's basically useless. That in itself is not young people's fault. They have genuinely been dealt a terrible hand in many ways, and I don't blame them for being angry about it. I too am angry about it! I do question, however, when the overwhelming sentiment became "well we should just give up and let the bad guys win, either because it's too much work to change it or because that will spark the Great Revolution and that's the only way to fix things ever, and doing anything else at all in the meantime is wrong."

Once again: I do not blame young people for being angry at the shitty situation they are currently facing. I do not blame young people for being disillusioned with the system and thinking that it can't solve everything at once. But yet again: there has never been any government, country, or organization in the history of ever anything everywhere that was able to do that, and the ones that tried, or insisted that they could do it, were infamously murderous bloodbaths, because breaking society (even with all its flaws) into a thousand pieces and thinking this will make My Preferred Ideological Utopia Now Appear is probably the deadliest belief in all of time and space. The world is flawed and has been for all time because humans are flawed and probably will be for all time. Being a grownup requires coming to an understanding of that fact and seeing what you can do in spite of that. People in every era have had gaps and biases and blind spots and other things that hobbled their understanding or made their efforts for change less perfect or complete than they would have wanted in an ideal world, and they have had to move past those anyway. The current generation is no different. Not to sound like a boomer, but even despite the mess they've been faced with, they need to figure out how to engage with it anyway and not just completely absolve responsibility because they can't fix it all at once. Which I don't think most young people do! There are plenty of them who really do get it and are engaged and idealistic and working for good change, and that's great! It's just the other part that worries me, and which is not as small as we would like to think.

And yes, part of this is just flat-out bad information and the stubborn lack of any desire to change it if it conflicts with pre-existing beliefs. (This is by no means exclusive to young people of this current generation, as it's another bad habit of humanity, but yes.) In the aforementioned "you're driving young leftists away :(" ask I got yesterday, there were also plenty of dubious and just-flat-wrong claims, such as that Democrats keep moving to the right "especially economically." That is just not true. In the last four years, the Democrats have moved the most economically leftward in all of American history and have finally and flatly rejected the Great Reagonomics Myth. Just because Clinton did Reagonomics-lite in the '90s (when most of the current generation of Online Leftists weren't even born), that is thirty years ago and in wildly different circumstances. These things are not difficult to look up. Do it. Try to educate yourself, even if the system doesn't want to do it. You can't just throw up your hands and insist that nobody taught you, so how could you know??? Put that "instant access to all of human history and knowledge" to use, even just a little. It'll be good for you!

Likewise, there was also the anon's befuddling insistence that I was "patronizing" or "shaming" anyone "further left than Biden," which reflects their apparent feeling that telling people to vote for Biden is a "personal attack" on their cherished beliefs, or whatever. I'm unsure how many times we have to keep repeating that voting for a candidate does not mean you are canonizing all their beliefs exactly as your own, and that it's just one tool to do the bare minimum to not live in a fucking fascist theocratic dictatorship, but yeah. I can guarantee you that I personally am well left of Biden. I can guarantee you that most people on Tumblr voting for Biden are probably well left of him as well. That does not negate the fact that Biden is the most progressive president America has ever had, regardless of how much Online Leftists shriek otherwise. It also does not negate the fact that this is by no means true of America as a whole (witness the large faction that still thinks Biden is a godless far-left evil socialist). It does not negate the many complex historical, political, social, cultural, religious, racial, etc reasons that have collided to produce the America where this is the case. Therefore, if I do not want to live in a society ruled by Trump and his orange Nazi minions, which is the case due to how badly the last 10 years have been fucked up, I will use the tool of voting for Biden! He can be successfully pressured to create positive change in the direction that I would like! Trump cannot and will not under any circumstances, regardless of the wild fantasies that suddenly he will transform into a perfect progressive on Gaza or whatever other issue! THIS IS NOT THAT FUCKING DIFFICULT!!!!!!!

Anyway. All of this is obviously complicated. Obviously things are bad and frightening and we want a solution that fixes all of it at once, instead of slowly, badly, and piecemeal. But as I said: that has never, not once, been the case in all of history, and we know what happens when people and/or governments with delusions of psychopathic grandeur try to do it. We do not want the "Final Solution" (which is infamous as what Hitler literally called the Holocaust). We do, in fact, want the careful step by step, we want things to get better and not just explode in a mountain of nihilistic doom, and that does take work, from everyone. So unfortunately, there is no real choice except to do it.

#anonymous #ask #history #politics for ts

[raz-writes-the-thing]

New Year's Kiss (Good Omens One-Shot)

Aziraphale x GN!Reader / requests are open

Summary: Aziraphale asks to be your New Year's kiss.

Fic type: holiday fluff

GOMENS: @coffee-and-red-lipstick @quickslvxrr @clarina04 @motionlessindoubt @stevekempscocktails @go-bonkers-go-foolish @peytonpenguin37 @florduarte @complimentary-breadbasket @thekirbishow @jaziona92 (send an ask to be added to a tag list!)

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

You’d mentioned it when you were a little tipsy on New Year's morning. You’d never been kissed. You’d never had a kiss on New Year’s either. Well, those things sort of went hand in hand, but the point was- you’d never felt someone’s lips upon yours. 

It wasn’t necessarily something that upset you. It was a fact just like how caterpillars have, like, four thousand muscles was a fact. But Aziraphale was a romantic at heart, and how could he let a stunning creature such as you go without a New Year’s kiss when there wouldn’t be another chance of that for another whole year? Not a long time for Aziraphale, no- but it was for you. 

So, at five minutes to, Aziraphale took your hands in his and gave you one of his ever so charmingly romantic smiles. 

“My dear,” he started somewhat hesitantly. Like he didn’t quite know what to say. “I’ve been thinking about your confession this morning.” 

“My confession?” You asked, having sobered up many hours previous. “Oh! The New Year’s kiss thing? Yeah, what about it?” 

Aziraphale’s thumb brushed over the back of your hand. Your heart skipped a beat. 

You’d had feelings for Aziraphale for a while now. How could you not? He was soft, kind, handsome and a reader. And he did his own washing- what more could you ask for, really? But you’d never really entertained the idea that he might have felt the same way for you. 

“I know I haven’t mentioned it before,” he said, clearing his throat and ordering his thoughts. “But- if you were amenable, I- well, I would be honoured if you’d do me the honour of being your first.” 

You blinked a couple of times, trying to let the information absorb into your brain. 

“Kiss, that is,” he hurriedly corrected, though you honestly wouldn’t have minded the alternative either just quietly. 

“I- Aziraphale,” you breathed, a smile slowly spreading over your lips. You bit down on your bottom one so as not to seem too eager. There was a squeal threatening to escape you any second now.

“I know this is highly unusual for romantic courtships,” he continued on, clearly growing anxious now. “But I just thought, well, why not ‘shoot my shot’, as it were.” 

Your eyes darted to the countdown on the television. Just a minute left now. Outside, you could hear the people gathered on the street start to countdown. 

“I- yes, Aziraphale. I would love that.” 

Aziraphale looked very pleased with himself, and he let go of one of your hands to brush his forefinger down your cheek. 

“You’re truly stunning, my dear. Gorgeous.” 

You could feel your cheeks flush slightly at the compliment. Aziraphale was always paying you compliments, but they never ceased to fluster you with their sincerity. 

“You’re not so bad yourself,” you chuckled back, eyes roaming over his features. He really was gorgeous, wasn’t he? Outside, you could hear the countdown get louder as it reached ten seconds to go. 

Your grin was infectious, and Aziraphale shot you one of his own. He shuffled in place as if he were nervous. He probably was. 

And then the countdown struck zero, and Aziraphale’s lips were on yours. Soft skin but a firm press of his lips. Your arms wound around his neck and you pressed yourself close. You’d waited so long for this- for a kiss, for Aziraphale, really. 

And now you had him. 

Zira pulled away and pressed his forehead to yours affectionately. He held you close, not wanting to let go of you just yet. 

“Happy New Year, my darling,” he said, pressing a kiss to your forehead. 

“Happy New Year, Zira,” you replied lovingly. 

It was gonna be a good year. You just knew it.

#aziraphale fanfiction #good omens aziraphale #aziraphale x reader #good omens #aziraphale #aziraphale x yn #aziraphale x y/n #aziraphale x you #good omens fic #good omens drabble #good omens imagine #gomens drabble #gomens imagine #gomens fic #gomens fanfic #gomens fanfiction #ineffable husbands #michael sheen #good omens x reader #michael sheen x reader

[bless-my-demons]

Redamancy: Chapter Two

Jasper Hale x Reader

Series Summary: What happens when your soulmate is a vampire that struggles to maintain a diet of trying not to kill you? Common sense says run for the hills, nothing is worth your life - but my heart is whispering why not, what’s there to lose?

Warnings: None

Notes: So sorry it took me more than a week to post, life kind of imploded and knocked me off the schedule I had planned. This chapter is honestly just filler so it can get to the good stuff… I plan to take this story all the way to Breaking Dawn at the very least. Thank you for all the love on the previous chapter!! Enjoy!

Word Count: 1695

Series Masterlist

• January 24th, 2005 • Forks High School •

Reader

Thankfully the first half of the day went rather uneventful, although I am disappointed I haven’t had a class with the handsome Jasper Hale yet. I did however, make friends with his adopted siblings Alice and Emmett Cullen. Both of which are gorgeous in their own right, but nowhere near as attractive as their blonde brother.

In English I sat in the unoccupied seat next to Alice Cullen, gratefully so. She seems like just the kind of friend a new girl needs in order to survive high school. I transferred to this place at such a horrible time in the year - almost at the end of my 11th grade. But after just a few minutes of knowing her, Alice caught me up on everything I missed. Turns out I’ve pretty much read everything they had covered this year and then some, fingers crossed that it continues to be a trend in most of my classes.

I learned that the boy walking with Jasper Hale this morning when I so rudely almost killed him with the door to the front office, is his adopted brother Emmett Cullen. A hulking mass of muscle, but a complete teddy bear, he kept me entertained for most of Trig. I can already tell that sitting in front of him was probably a bad move on my part for my academic career, but the guy is an absolute comedian.

Parting ways with Emmett after Math, I made my way to my locker. Digging the wrinkled combination paper out of my pocket, I was studying the numbers right when I bumped into a thin scrap of a girl with brown hair and an orange backpack. Immediately cursing myself I dropped to the ground to gather her notes before they could be stepped on by the stampede of people rushing to the cafeteria for lunch.

“Oh my god I’m so sorry! I-I just wasn’t paying attention, I was looking at my stupid locker combination and-“ I scrambled for excuses, word vomit spilling from my lips.

“Oh um, it’s okay! I’m not the most graceful person, so no worries.” An awkward pause, “Hey, you’re the new girl right?” She asked.

“Unfortunately.” I replied, looking up with a sad smile. I stuck out my hand to shake, “I’m Y/n Y/l/n, you are?”

“Bella Swan, former new girl I guess.” She responded as she lightly shook my hand. “You can sit with me during lunch if you want, maybe us gracefully-challenged should stick together.”

“Oh absolutely.” I chuckled a little, “I’ll grab my lunch from my locker and find you in there.”

“Cool, see you then.” She replied with a half-wave as she continued down the hallway to the cafeteria.

Jasper

One of the convenient things about being a vampire is that we really don’t necessarily need to breathe. In public places packed with humans, I can just hold my breath, but the challenge comes in making it still seem like I’m breathing.

Lost in my thoughts while Emmett and Rosalie drone on about plans after school, I spot the new girl - Y/n enter the cafeteria. I sit up straighter in my seat and observe her shamelessly as she walks unknowingly in my direction, switching paths as she spots the object of Edward’s latest desire: Isabella Swan. I spare a glance to my stoic adopted brother and see him rising from his seat, probably headed in the same direction as Y/n.

Walking up to the pair, I could tell his eyes were only on Isabella. Both girls stared up at him in awe, their emotions giving away that they were surprised to see him seeking them, or rather a certain one of them, out.

“Isabella-“ Edward started but was interrupted by Y/n.

“I’ll… go find us a seat.” Bella didn’t even spare her a glance as Y/n rushed away.

“Bro, you’re staring a little hard there, something catch your eye?” Emmett said, leaning over Rosalie to nudge my ribs. I turn to him and discreetly flash a crude gesture, causing him to chuckle. I love my brother, he just thrives on getting a rise out of me any chance he gets.

Alice smacks my shoulder, “You two behave, she’s shy and I’ll be upset if your rowdiness scares her off.” My adopted sister huffs in slight frustration at our antics.

“As if we need another human in our business.” Rosalie grumbles from her spot between myself and her mate. Crossing her arms, she stares daggers at the back of Edward’s head from where he’s talking to Bella Swan.

“Oh hush, I want more friends outside of you guys, plus Y/n is relatively safe. Cheer up Rose, I’ve already seen you get along with her rather nicely!” Alice fires back at Rose.

“I haven’t even met her yet-“ Rosalie leans forward to argue.

“But you will and you’ll love her, end of story.” Alice says matter-of-factly.

Rose leans back in her seat, huffing as Emmett pats her thigh. She swipes his hand away, not happy that he finds it amusing that she’ll have to deal with another one of her brother’s fixations on a human girl. It’s always so easy to read Rosalie’s emotions, she wears them so boldly and almost prefers to torture me with their intensity sometimes, as if to get her point across even more than her biting words.

I let out a sigh at their exchange concerning Y/n, she’s been here for half a day and already a hot topic for even us.

I’ve been in a trance pretty much since lunch, the two classes following it were uneventful allowing my thoughts to fill with day-dreams of the new girl.

Her hair, the way her oversized sweater hangs from her shoulders, her intoxicating scent…

The bell ending sixth period startles me from my reverie. This girl almost put a me-sized-dent in the door to the front office this morning and here I am obsessing over minuscule details after only seeing her twice.

I gather my notes and writing utensils before filing out of the door behind my fellow classmates. I slow my walk to the next class in hopes that I might catch a glimpse of her before the end of the day. I don’t even know her emotional signature yet like I do my adopted siblings, a handy ability I’ve managed to teach myself to find them in busy situations.

My search for Y/n comes up short, the hallways are mostly empty by the time the warning bell rings for the final instruction of the day. With a small huff I enter my seventh period class keeping my eyes on the floor as I make my way to my assigned seat.

“Glad you could make it in the nick of time, Mister Hale.” Mr. Ellis states rather loudly in an accusatory tone, raising an eyebrow as I sit and the final tardy bell rings.

An almost imperceptible gasp to my right keeps me from replying, I clamp my mouth shut and force myself not to meet the gaze I could feel boring into my back as flames begin to lick down my throat.

Wonderful, not only was I late enough to garner the attention of everyone in the room, but Y/n Y/l/n is in my history class and I can’t breathe for the next forty-four minutes.

• January 24th, 2005 • Home •

Reader

“How was school sweetheart?” My mother yells from the kitchen as I push open our front door, I swear that woman wastes no time when digging for information.

“Jeez, let me get in the door first!” I yell back with a light-hearted chuckle, setting my backpack on the ground by the couch just inside the living room.

“Sorry, I’m just excited to see how everything went.” Her voice is much closer this time and I turn to see her walking down the connecting hallway wiping her hands on a dish towel.

I flop onto my back on the couch as she leans over the back, folding her arms under her chest with an expectant look on her face ready for my response.

“Well, I don’t think it’ll be hard to catch up in-“ but my mom interrupts me excitedly.

“No, no, no! I need the good stuff! Did you make any friends? See any cute guys?” I could burst out laughing at the look on her face and the fact that she’s more concerned about my social life than my academics on the first day of school in a new town.

“Mom!” I drag the word out in exasperation as I smush a decorative pillow to my face to hide the slight heat in my cheeks.

“There’s a cute boy! I knew it!” She practically yells in victory, “tell me everything, baby girl!”

I pull the pillow down enough to reveal my eyes to her, “I almost killed him with a door.” I mumble in a rather sad tone.

“Oh dear God.” She immediately becomes serious, rounding the couch to push my legs off, forcing me upright so she can sit next to me, “it can’t be that bad!”

“I wasn’t looking while I pushed open the door to the front office and he barely caught it in time before it hit him square in the face!” I blurt out in a rush and drop the pillow to cover my face with my hands. “Definitely not the way to start off on the right foot.”

“Oh honey,” she tries to sooth me, guiding my hands away from my face and into her hold, “look at it this way - you’ve captured his attention in a way that’ll be memorable. Sure it isn’t without embarrassment, but now you’ve made a first impression he’ll never forget!”

“Yeah and I’ll probably never hear the end of it.” I mumble as I bury my face in her shoulder, sighing deeply. I hesitate, “We do have one class together.”

The gasp my mother lets out immediately sends me into a fit of giggles, forgetting all about my early morning embarrassment.

Next

#jasper hale x reader #twilight #jasper hale #jasper whitlock #jasper whitlock hale #twilight fanfiction #redamancy series #bless-my-demons #female reader insert #jasper hale fanfiction

[rosemaze-reveries]

cassia crushing on you hcs

⚠ typical cassia-isms, ie. stalking, obsessive behavior, murder attempts (?) ⚠ reader ≠ chief

You’re an anomaly in Cassia’s quest to hunt down the "fairest one of all" — like Chief, it’s not necessarily your beauty that’s captivated her, but your scent is irresistible just the same. She can’t place the reason. Not that that’s important. All Cassia knows is that it's addicting and she wants more of it.

Typically, Cassia would say that the potency of her perfumes is directly proportional to how beautiful she considers their inspirations. Her fixation on you runs a little deeper than visual attraction, and yet the richness in your scent rivals all her previous creations; she's eager to add this novelty to her lineup.

She collects pieces of you when you're careless enough to leave them behind. A lock of hair from your brush. Your favorite pen. Your fork after dessert. A shirt, especially if it's still warm—your scent is strongest then. Some are to use in perfumes, others are for personal safekeeping.

For a long time, she mistakes her obsession to begin and end with your scent. People rarely serve her any other purpose. She has tried to put you to sleep through various means to obtain more of it: a poisoned comb, a sedative perfume, helping you into a corset strung too tight. Chief always steps in before she gets too far. Now, you're familiar enough with her habits to evade them.

If Cassia is ever frustrated with you slipping away, she never shows it. She continues to seek you out, even for casual conversation, as if her attempts to 'collect' you never happened.

Occasionally she expresses concern for your wellbeing — your scent reveals a lot to her — and she'll offer you rejuvenating perfumes when you're feeling under the weather. You might have trouble making sense of her intentions knowing she has a track record of spritzing people unconscious.

Does she genuinely hold an interest in you as a person? Or are you just imagining things? It's odd for Cassia to be so taken by someone. Even odder for her to drag it out this long. Once she sets her eyes on something, rarely would anyone be successful in prying it from her fingers. You convince yourself it's because you have Chief's protection.

Cassia's mindset is simple: she makes fragrances to bring herself salvation. She doesn't murder in cold blood -- her "inspirations" fall into an eternal slumber, wholly unaware of what's happening to them, and their sacrifice will go on to save someone else. It's never done out of malice.

She reasons that keeping you around might give her the same salvation she's been longing for -- you are her "immortal fragrance," even if not in the form she expected. She still makes perfumes using your hair, if you let her, but also finds deep gratification in your physical presence. She likes burrowing her face into your neck, taking deep inhales for the slow pleasure of it.

Cassia isn't an experienced lover, as she's kept an icy distance from most in her life. She doesn't have much self-restraint when she wants something, though, so she becomes intimate very quickly.

#the world is cassia's dollhouse and we're just here to look pretty for her #🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣 #path to nowhere #ptn imagines #ptn cassia #cassia x reader #ptn x reader

[theterribletenno]

Aight I'm about to do something.

I'm going to define the generations of Warframe based on broad design principles and trends and I bet a bunch of people are gonna get their panties in a bunch over minutiae. I guess to prevent unnecessary "um actually"-ism in the notes I'll preface with

A. This is based on personal opinion and is not meant to be interpreted as provable or disprovable fact. B. There will be outliers in every generation that buck trends and you don't need to point them all out.

G1 the Classic warframes. Being functionally prototypes of an un-finished and un-proven game the first generation of warframes had a lot to prove and not a lot to lean on. Generation one has rather limited mechanics and setups (some of which have been remedied post-release with reworks). Most generation one frames were very formulaic and laid the foundation for future warframe design;

First ability: Basic damage "bolt" attack. Second ability: An escalation of the basic bolt, usually with higher damage and wider range. (May be replaced by a second special tactics ability) Third ability: Special tactics ability, often for defense or support, has the most variety of functions. Fourth ability: Global nuke (or exalted weapon if you're fancy).

G1.5 the Iteration warframes. Generation 1.5 was more varied than the originals, with some frames being continuations of the original formula but almost all of them adding novel mechanics to the game.

G2 the Exploration warframes. More consistent and bolder exploration of new mechanics and playstyles than the previous frames, going beyond iterating on formula and incorporating novel elements to more than just one or two abilities, the first generation of true experimentation.

G3 the Complete warframes. What sets this era of warframe design apart form others is the "completeness" of their kits, by which I mean no skill is divisible from the whole, they all work in conjunction to create a wholly unique playstyle. These interconnected and self-contained ability sets make these warframes exceptional in both the short and long term. Excalibur Umbra is something of an outlier in this generation and sort of belongs in his own category separate from both original and prime frames.

G4 the Style warframes. These warframes were mechanically a step backwards from the third generation, due to having overall shallower and less interconnected abilities. This is not to say that these warframes are bad or insufficient. While some of these frames prioritized aesthetic over performance they are overall successful and some manage to incorporate new novel mechanics and tools which were either not previously conceived or otherwise possible with old architecture.

G5 the Saturation warframes. This most recent generation is rather perplexing, seeming to run hot and cold. Lessons from all previous generations seem to be present, although not all are equally successful. With members that imitate the classics, dabble in iteration and experimentation, and attempt to capture both completeness and style in their visual and mechanical design. What can be said about this generation, unfortunately, is that while it attempts to tread new ground most of its members cannot avoid being compared to older warframes occupying the same niche and may be ultimately redundant. This may be in part due to the game's age and not necessarily a condemnation of the new frames' design.

#warframe #video games #videogames #is this a symptom of something

[multi-fandomsfreak]

Okay my request is Xenophanes(Sonic.ExE) fluff headcanons when the reader gives him pets and scratches behind his ears(probably his favorite spot) (I headcanon he’s very clingy and wants attention that’s why he’s so possessive over the reader)

(if you don’t mind- I really love Xeno)

Xenophane Fluff Headcanons

Hey thanks for the ask

Of course I don’t mind. Honestly I don’t blame you for liking him, it’s the same for me as well. Also, I actually like that headcanon. To think that you can get xeno to be clingy and possessive by a simple gesture. Anyways, hopes you enjoy. ~ J/Blaze

Pronouns: Not Mentioned

Warning: ⚠️Some swearing here and there⚠️

Requested: Yes/No

Characters: Xenophane/Sonic.exe

Proofread: ❌

Credits: Art by Groowwll on Twitter + Banner by MaybeAriaaaa on Pinterest

———————————

- When you first decided to pet xeno initially he’s confused as fuck. You, a mere mortal, was petting him who he considers himself a god like a goddamn dog. Do you not have a death wish? You clearly do if you're doing this to him. But at the same time he can’t really deny that it feels good but knowing xeno there’s no way in hell he’ll admit it. You're not going to get xeno to admit that he enjoys this, he’s too prideful to admit it but I’m pretty sure that it would be so he doesn’t really say anything about it.

- This is probably one of the only times you get to see him like this and only you, no one else. He wouldn’t dare be caught doing this or do it with other people. You're an exception that he’s willing to make. Surprisingly he gets really embarrassed, almost like a child being embarrassed by their parents. But it doesn’t really matter to you, no matter how many times he tells you to stop, you still keep doing it and to be honest he actually kind of impressed that you don’t give up easily and actually praises you for it despite the situation he’s doing it in. On the other hand, if he sees anyone or anything that wants you to do the same to them that you do to him, he immediately gets really jealous. Yes he knows that he may or may not be contradicting himself but you're his, you belong to him you can only do that to him. He demands your attention. It's not his fault that you’ve got him hooked onto you just from a simple movement of your hand. He’s basically the definition of that one cat meme:

+ Xeno -

+ Also Xeno -

- Slight adding in the previous point, sometimes when you do this to him he becomes slightly self conscious. Like sure he likes it and doesn’t necessarily mind you doing it but he kind of feels like he’s not being seen as scary. He likes it when people are afraid of him and when he sees someone who isn’t he doesn’t really know what to do. It surprised you that xeno can even feel self conscious but despite that you still comfort him. You still tell him that he’s great at doing what he is, just because you're doing this doesn’t mean you think he’s weak

- Just like you’ve said in your request when you do this xeno can become very clingy towards you. As soon as you gently scratch him (especially behind the ears) he immediately stops whatever he’s doing and just goes limp. Congrats you’ve managed to get xeno to go limp, you definitely deserve a medal. You’ve got him in your arms, maybe if you're lucky he’s got his arms around you while you're patting his head. Obviously you do ask him beforehand if you can do it, you weren’t about to risk your life all for a head pat. But sometimes if he’s pissed off enough or in a bad mood you don’t even have to ask him. I can imagine him finding you and just grabbing you, taking you somewhere it’s just the two of you and placing your hand on his head.

- Okay can I just say that he definitely purrs when you pat his head or a noise something similar to it. Some sort of noise to indicate he enjoys it. There’s definitely some times where you’ve pointed it out but of course xeno shuts it down immediately acting like you’re hearing things and immediately demands you continue petting him.

———————————

#sonic.exe #sonic.exe x reader #xenophanes #xenophanes x reader #xenophane #xenophane x reader #sonic the hedgehog #sonic series #sonic series x reader #sonic #sonic x reader #x reader #request

[pedrostylez]

Before Mi Luz

pairing: Javier Peña x fem!reader

summary: reader and Javier are coworkers that typically hate each other, but find each other helpful in relieving that stress

rating: 18+ (no minors please)

word count:4.6k

warnings etc: smut, dirty talk, unprotected p in v sex, pet names… NO USE OF Y/N.

A/N: This is the prologue to my first writing “Mi Luz” with Javi and reader. There's some context and then a dirty ending…if I have misspelled anything or whatever please tell me omg

You were carrying your box of personal items, ready for your job to start. Did you know any Spanish? No. Did you know anyone that you were working with? No. But…they had recruited you for your organization and for your ability to remember things, and that alone gave you some confidence that you didn’t originally have.

Your first day would have gone off without any issues if you hadn’t bumped into the first person you saw as soon as you entered the building. It was the damn heels you thought you had to wear, but after today you would make the argument that you were more efficient without them. No one was hurt, but you were startled, and as you went to apologize a gruff voice said “watch it.”, which you would come to find out later was Peña. You scoffed, and continued on to your office that you had been shown the previous day. That must have been the only time you would see him…right? The embassy was big, and for all you knew, you would never see him again. 

You had never yelled at anyone before-not like this. Sure, maybe at your younger sister when she stole something from your room, or at your dad when he had drank too much and hurt your mom, but you really truly weren’t like this. You were infuriated beyond measure, to the point of almost crying. And you knew plenty of people who cried when they were angry, but you weren’t one of them. You stood your ground, said your piece, and it would end there-someone would be declared a winner. Even when they tried to stoop low and make you hurt, say things that normal people wouldn’t say, you never lost your cool. 

But fighting with Peña was different. He was in your space, fucking around with your files when you had gone on lunch, and now you were screaming at each other. He was stooping lower than anyone else you had ever met, grinding every gear and just getting under your skin. Couldn’t he leave well enough alone?

Peña didn’t know how it started at all-he had come in here to ask you a question and you were missing. He waited 10 minutes exactly, until 1 pm when lunch ended for administrative staff, and when you didn’t return he started rifling through what he assumed would give him answers. Of course, it didn’t, and so he started opening more boxes. 

He didn’t hear you come in, because unlike the other girls in the office you wore either flats or tennis shoes. He teased you about it, seeing as it was not considered protocol, but you didn’t like it when he spoke to you and he didn’t necessarily get why. 

And now you were screaming at him and he was matching your energy. He needed intel and you weren’t here, what was he supposed to do? Let them get away?

You were arguing that he could have fucking called you, or had gone to the cafeteria where you had your lunch. But how the hell was he supposed to know that? Was he supposed to crawl around on his knees and wander around and beg you to help? 

He could see the fire behind your eyes, almost as if you were blacking out this argument, and it only fueled him more. You wanted to be angry? He could be just as angry. 

And when Murphy came in to break it up, Peña was pushed out of the room and heard muffled sobs. Man, had he really been that aggressive? But you started it! He could hear Murphy cooing at you to calm you down, telling you that Peña was wrong to speak to you that way. He was asking you what Peña had asked you-for the exact same intel. The way that you blindly gave it to Murphy so that only a few minutes later that blonde-headed asshole came out into the hallway to shake his head at Peña and shove the file in his chest, made Peña wonder what your deal was. 

Today was rough on multiple levels. Everything was out of place,  Peña and Murphy needed way more intel than you could provide, and to top it all off they had caught one of Escobar's closest henchmen.

Your hair was starting to frizz. The door to the embassy and into the office and therefore into your basement back room had been opened so many times that the humidity felt like it was drowning you. You picked your shirt off your chest, trying to create some airflow as you exited the bathroom directly across from the archives.

Bumping into Peña was always a hassle, just like the first time. Today it had been happening over and over because of how much information he needed, but in general, you avoided him. Murphy was nicer, smoother with talking to women since he actually had a wife, but blunt enough that he didn't waste time.  Peña on the other hand...

You could see why the girls in the office liked him-his jaw, the puppy dog eyes he used when he wanted something...but that was all he had. And he didn’t use the puppy dog eyes on you. Speaking to him wasn't typically pleasant, and you came to find out by listening to the men in the office that he really only paid for sex. It would explain why when he was talking to women in the office he relied on his eyes and talked lowly rather than with any charisma. You were thankful that he didn’t find it worth his time to try his hand at seducing you.

When he bumped into you again as you exited the bathroom, you had to hold your tongue. Was it really that difficult to see where he was going? "We got 'em." He said breathlessly, a small smirk coming to his lips as he looked at you shaking your shirt for some sort of cool air.

"Oh, that's great." You were sure you sounded monotone, but after the length of this day you didn't really care to be polite.

"It's uh...it's because of your archives of previous intel." He stated, wiping his forehead with the back of his hand. "Why is it so damn hot in here?"

"People keep opening the door and letting out my cold basement air." You grumbled. It sounded like  Peña was trying to thank you for helping, but you weren't going to assume that. If he wanted to thank you, then he would, but since he hadn’t ever before, you doubted it.

 Peña's lips ticked up in the corner again. "Murphy sent me to invite you out for drinks with the rest of the office since it was because of you." He breathed, placing his hands on his hips.

You glanced at his shirt that seemed to have no buttons working, practically open to his navel with sweat covering his throat and collarbones. Eyes shooting back up to his face seeing his smirk deepening, you thought that maybe this was why others in the office swooned-that damn smirk.

"I appreciate it, but I am not sure I am going to go." You sighed, moving away from him and going back to the archives room where the air was still damp but cooler. He followed you, tilting his head as he held open the door. "Either come in or don't  Peña, stop holding open the door."

"You really want me to disappoint Murphy? And his wife?" Peña saw you eye him, and it was the first time he ever caught you. Maybe your walls were starting to come down after the year and a half you had worked with him and Murphy, and maybe he could get you to open up like Murphy got you to. In a way he was jealous that Murphy and his wife had such a good relationship with you-but he didn’t try too hard either. 

"I'm not sure that is all that new  Peña." You smirked, picking up files that had been used today and placing them back on their appropriate shelf.

 Peña scoffed at your dig at him. You were starting to make jokes at his expense, which he assumed was a good sign. He knew how tidy you kept this room, knowing every piece of information down to the letter and where it belonged. Most of the time Murphy would ask you a question regarding a member of the cartel and you could rattle off the answer before providing the file as proof. It was like you were their own personal library that they could press a button and the answers would appear.

He realized now that it was why you had gotten so upset with him and had a screaming match with him all those months ago. He never apologized to you, and just let Murphy do the talking.

But you were always sharp-tongued with  Peña. Murphy joked that you preferred blondes over brunettes, but  Peña saw the way you looked at him just now, and noted that it probably wasn’t the first time. It was like you wanted to know more, but wasn't willing to because of how much you hated him. Maybe you wanted to keep your job secure and not risk a hate fuck-others in the office weren't too worried about their job. He never had to work hard to get someone to fuck him. And if in the case that no one wanted to, he would go find "intel" of his own and pay for it, which typically meant he had to talk to you the next day to update you on a file or add information to one.

He could see your jaw ticking every time he came in the next day, smelling slightly of another girl's perfume as you noted down the information he gathered. Always silent, staring at his chin or his neck instead of his eyes. He didn't know how to win you over, but upsetting you was sometimes just as good.

He sighed, closing the door behind him as he walked away. He wasn't really keen on going to this celebration either. It was unusually hot today, and it wasn't like they caught Escobar himself. Sure, it was someone close to him, but he didn't want to celebrate too soon. The only way he was planning on going was if you were, if not to just annoy you and watch how you were when you relaxed.

He heard stories from the girls that would gather around a desk at lunchtime to chat about their weekend, and he knew that you could have a good time. He had just yet to see it. And he wanted to-desperately.

A deep sigh left your lips as you shut the archives door behind you, locking it and sliding the key into your purse. Somehow you had become the key holder, and you didn't mind it. You stayed later, and didn't trust one of the other workers to not mess up the organization system you had carefully crafted for the embassy.

Trudging up the stairs and breaking a sweat as a wave of heat hit your face, you glanced over to the pit-where all the officers desks were-and saw most of the lights off. Only one remained, cigarette in the air almost to it's end.  Peña's eyes shot up to yours, seeing that you were watching him. "Heading to the bar?"

You scoffed, shaking your head and walking towards the front door. "No, I am going to go home and take a cold shower."

"Wait-"  Peña put out the cigarette and quickly stood up, grabbing his jacket that had his keys in it. "I'll walk you out."

"You don't need to do that, I am typically here alone when leave anyways." Him asking to walk you out stopped you in your tracks. You couldn't tell if he had ulterior motives or if he was just being polite. Why was he all of a sudden being nice to you?

"I'm heading home too." He laughed, walking up to your side and pausing with you. "It's not as sweet of a victory until Escobar goes down."

You nodded, motioning to the door and beginning your trek to your car. It wasn't a long walk, but it was likely to be hot and you would need to take a few breaks. You didn't get the front parking spot typically, seeing as you worked in archives and weren't leaving during the day like the agents were. It made you thankful that you made the switch to sneakers early on, and didn’t have sores on the back of your feet like some of the ladies. 

 Peña walked beside you, slowing his stride enough to see which direction you were headed. His car was parked up front, now next to empty spots but typically next to Murphy's. "Where is your car?"

He followed your point, seeing that you were going to walk around 10 minutes uphill before you would reach your car. "I don't get VIP parking Peña." You laughed-he had never heard you laugh. He watched you start to walk away, giving the smallest of waves and he knew that something in the air was different tonight. He wanted to hear you laugh again. 

"Let me drive you over there then." He blurted, stomping out his cigarette and placing his sunglasses on his face. He wanted you to say yes, and he felt like he could persuade you easily. 

His offer surprised you, making you turn around and look at him. "What? No, it's fine." The sun was at the wrong angle and you had to shade your eyes, seeing his pink shirt had slight sweat marks on the collar. 

He smirked, pointing his thumb at his Jeep. "I have air conditioning, and that way you don’t have to sweat the whole way over."

He knew he had you willing when you stood stock still and tilted your head, looking at his car. It was a tempting offer…

And you didn’t say anything besides walk carefully over to the passenger side of his car. He was still shocked, having to move quickly to unlock it so that you didn’t change your mind last minute. He slid into his seat, immediately starting the engine and blasting the air to get it 

moving. 

You both sat in his car for a couple minutes, staring at his radio as he changed the channel until he found something he liked while the air began to cool down and you could feel yourself start to relax. The air felt nice, and his car was much quicker than yours at making the air cool. “Is your car new?”

He glanced at you, leaning back in his seat. “It’s a couple years old, but yeah I bought it new.” He took in how you leaned back, the air making your shirt move in its gusts against your chest, and how your hands weren’t clutching your bag so tight. “Do you make that walk every day?”

You nodded, laughing lightly again. “I already told you-I’m just archives Peña, I don’t get special treatment like you and Steve.” 

Not only did you laugh but he heard how you called Murphy by his first name and it irritated him. Had he really not gotten to know you that much? “You can call me by my first name too, you know.”

You scoffed, shifting in your seat and crossing your arms. “I don’t know you well enough Peña, to be calling you anything besides that.”

He forgot why he was irritated, because how you crossed your arms made your chest look…amazing. He knew he was staring too long, but in a way he wanted you to know that he found you attractive, especially since you and him didn’t seem to get along. Maybe you would be sweeter on him if you knew he found you physically attractive. 

“Eyes up here asshole.” You snapped, rolling your eyes and sitting back straight. “Are you going to drive me to my car or what?”

Well…that didn’t work. “Yeah I’ll drive you over.” He mumbled, wondering how he could get under your skin without starting a screaming match. “You just…that shirt is really nice.” He rolled his eyes at himself-that was lame as hell. 

But he got to hear you laugh again, and while he didn’t understand you, he liked hearing you happy. It made him feel like jell-o on the inside, and it was an ego boost to have you smiling because of him after so long of you not. “I think you were just looking at my tits, Peña.”

That made him choke and cough a little. “You have a mouth on you?” He let out an exasperated laugh, pulling up to your lonesome car and parking beside it so you could get out and slide into your drivers seat. 

“I’m surprised you thought I didn’t.” 

“I wouldn’t mind seeing more of what it could do.”

That was bold. You had never heard him be so bluntly flirty, seeing as any time you over heard him trying to pick up one of the office workers it was much more “want to go to the bathroom with me?” which didn’t sound like an appealing come on. You blinked at him, both of you exchanging looks for what felt like minutes. 

He knew he fucked up. Somehow he let the thought slip out of his mouth and now he was holding his breath for your reaction. He meant to say something stupid to see you laugh again, but instead came out this vulgar come on that wasn’t untrue, but not what he intended. “Um-I’m sorry I didn’t…it just slipped out.”

You glanced back down to his neck, watching his pulse pick up speed and how even with the cold air in his car it was still slick with sweat. He was nervous, and for some reason that was endearing to you. “I can do a few things…with my mouth.”

His eyes widened glancing to your eyes and then your lips and then your chest. Was he asleep at his desk? Did he fall asleep on the drive home? Was he drunk? “Yeah? Like what?” God he was pushing the limits right now. 

And suddenly you reach out and grabbed the back of his head and licked up his neck from his collarbone to his jaw. And the obscene sound that left his mouth spurred you on to do it again but end with biting his ear. 

 Peña was losing his mind. There was no way this was real. He reached out and grabbed the back of your head, pulling on your hair to detach you from his ear. You hissed, pushing back on his hand. “You want this? Here?”

You suddenly knew why the girls swooned for him. When he was in the moment with you, the breathlessness of his words, the timber of his voice made you buzz in his seat. With the cool air still blowing, the sun setting behind the building you both worked in, you nodded your head. “I could use a destress. Is that okay?”

He had to stop himself from exploding on the spot. You wanted to fuck him? Use him as your toy to unwind from the stressfulness of the job? He was on board for that. He pulled away from you, removing his hand from your head, killing the engine and getting out of the car quickly.  He walked around to the passenger side, opening your door and almost pulling you out too hard. “Get in the back seat.”

You felt yourself get wet, hopping into the back seat with his hand on your ass as he followed you in. The idea of fucking Peña had crossed your mind a few times, but you weren’t going to act on them until today when he said those words to you. No one had to know, right?

You flipped around as he grabbed your legs to slot himself between your thighs, pressing his erection to your center and pulling your skirt up. He leaned down to your neck and gave it the same treatment you gave his, biting your jaw at the end. “Fuck, I’ve been wanting you.” He groaned, palming the part of your ass that hung over his seat, kissing at your collar bone like his life depended on it. “What do you want baby? This is your chance to unwind, remember?”

You sighed, eye going skyward as he spoke to you. This is what you wanted after all. He was annoying as hell in the office but right now you needed him. You grabbed his hair and pulling him up to be eye level with you. “Sit up, Peña.”

He scrambled off of you, sitting up and guiding your hips to his and pulling you down so you could feel the friction of his jeans against your center. His hands reached forward to your chest, palming you and untucking your shirt from your skirt. “Fuck-”

The speed at which you unbuttoned his jeans and pulled his cock out was impressive. And what was more impressive was how quickly you sunk down on to him, pulling your panties to the side and letting him fill you to the hilt. He groaned, shocked at how quickly you sat on him, holding still and reaching around to your back to keep you steady. 

His mouth was open, sweat was dripping down his hairline as the back of your shirt was becoming see through with the heat. When he got out of the car and demanding you go to the back he had turned off the engine, and now it was like you were in a sauna. But somehow it made it better, because as you started to move Peña’s eyes closed in bliss. 

You leaned your head back, wrapping your arms around the front seats as leverage as you moved up and down on him.  Peña didn’t know if he wanted to lean back and watch you do the work or if he wanted to lean forward and lick your nipples, pull your hair, maybe thumb your clit. “You’re beautiful like this cariño.”

You moaned, opening your eyes to see him in awe of your body still covered. “We can only do this once, Peña.”

He grabbed your hip, halting your movements as he began to thrust upward and do the work. “Javier is just fine darlin’.” He pistoned into you, suddenly angry at how you wanted to keep this casual. Were you not absolutely infatuated like he was? The minute you let him touch you was like a reset in his brain-there was no way anyone else would fill his needs like you could. And the way you sat on his cock? And how he fit so snugly inside you? He refused to believe you didn’t feel it too. “We can see about this being only once baby-I think you’ll be too cock hungry, huh? Would you want to ride me again?”

You bit your lip and closed your eyes again, knuckles going white as your fingers sunk farther in to the seats. A light whimper escaped you, making Peña’s thrusts falter slightly, but he regained his rhythm and grabbed one of your arms to place your fingers on your clit. The way he spoke to you made you want to say yes, please but you held back. 

“I want you to cum on my cock and show me how much you’re enjoying this like I am. Don’t even fucking lie to me-play with your clit. Show me.” He felt out of control, almost in a completely different body with the way you fit so perfectly around him.

All the breath had left you when he spoke. This was his game. This is what kept women coming back. And there was no way you would be able to resist. 

He saw how much you liked his words, smirking and feeling accomplished. So this is what he needed to do to get you to be nice to him-fuck you into oblivion. “That’s it baby girl, you look so good like this, taking my cock. Does it feel good?” He watched you nod, throwing your head back again as your fingers slowed down. “Don’t stop, I want to feel you. Don’t wait for me honey-that’s so nice of you. This is for you. I want to see it.”

It didn’t take much longer for you to lose yourself, unable to control your moans as you began to release on him. The way you clenched around him was not what he expected, the flutter and the strong squeeze made him release too. He leaned forwarded groaning as he continued, burying his head into your chest. 

He slowed down, hot breath tickling your abdomen and fingers still clutching his front seats. His arms were wrapped around you, palms of his hands searing into your back and sides as he leaned slightly back. He wanted to tell you to come back to his place, that you could take a shower together and maybe you could show him more of your tricks with your mouth. But something sunk in him when he looked up to your eyes and how you were slowly coming out of a horny stupor. “Just sit here for a second, its ok.”

You felt panic rushing to your brain as you lifted yourself off of him quickly, making him hiss and hold on to your hips tighter. “Peña. I-shit, I shouldn’t have-”

“Don’t regret this, I needed this as much as you.” He said softly, desperately. He wanted to convince you to do it again. 

You looked at him and then looked out the windows of his Jeep. No one was around, and it was dark, the only light from the emergency lights surrounding the parking lot. “We can’t do this again, I really need this job-”

“No one will know, hermosa.” He was trying so hard to not be hurt by what you said, but he understood that you and he weren’t friends before this. That you had a job that you were proud of and didn’t want to risk any of it. “If you get back in the office and everyone gives you a hard time then we don’t have to do this again if you don’t want to but-” He faltered, chasing your eye line and finally grabbing your chin to force you to look at him. 

You let go of his front seat and sat up straight, hand resting on his arm that was holding your face in place. “I want to.” 

It was like cold water being poured over him when you admitted you would want to still fuck him. “I want you as much as I can have you.” Fuck he felt pathetic, completely at the mercy of you.

“One week and if no one thinks we…if I’m not completely humiliated then maybe we can-”

“You can take your stress out on me any day of the week.” It tumbled out of him, leaning forward to brush his lips against yours for a second. Any part of you he could have he would take. 

You chuckled, sliding off his lap and opening his back door. You stood up, fixing your skirt and turning around to see his cock still out going soft, completely overwhelmed. “I’ll see you next week, Javier.”

He watched you get into your car and start the engine, still not willing to move until he watched you pull away from the parking lot. He fixed his pants, stepped out the same side of the vehicle as you had, and shut the door gently. You called him by his first name and that alone felt like an improvement. Javier didn’t know what had just happened, but he knew that he couldn’t wait for the end of next week when he got to pull you close again, knowing he wasn’t going to be able to resist.

#JAVIER PENA SMUT #JAVIER PENA FANFICTION #JAVIER PENA FIC #JAVIER PENA FANFIC #JAVIER PENA X READER SMUT #JAVIER PENA X READER #JAVIER PENA X FEMALE READER #JAVIER PENA X F!READER #NARCOS FANFICTION #NARCOS SMUT #NARCOS FANFIC #PEDRO PASCAL FANFICTION #PEDRO PASCAL SMUT #PEDRO PASCAL FANFIC #PEDRO PASCAL CHARACTERS #AGENT PENA SMUT #AGENT PENA FANFICTION #AGENT PENA FANFIC

[blissfulip]

Dopamine

On AO3

Viktor x f!reader

Rating: Explicit

Tags: enemies to lovers, slow burn, angst, idiots in love (?) dubious science, mostly canon compliant, no use of y/n, chemist!reader, eventual smut, masturbation, angry sex, unprotected sex,

Cw: lot's of blood, slight spice if you squint

Words: 1.7k

[A/N: bit of a shorter one this time, in preparation for the teeth-rotting fluff and filth that awaits in the final chapter~ tags and content warnings to be updated in each chapter, updates weekly(ish). (also, let me know if you want to be tagged in fic updates!)]

Tags: @ihopeinevergetsoberr @chemical-killjoy @jinxed-jk @bobobomao @queen-of-elves @thedustybunny @syren201

Previous Next

Chapter 8: Blood-tinted

You had become so small all of a sudden. The earnest compulsion to scream at Viktor, to tell him how much his constant presence in your life lately had exerted an influence over your thoughts—a negative one you planned to clarify soon thereafter—was brought to a halt. The blood made you panic, and seeing you there, his own shoulders depleted into a pronounced hunch, as if he expected you to pester him with questions he did not want to answer. 

You didn’t; instead, your hand swiftly held his wrist as you conducted him out of the bathroom, and out there, you swerved through the commotion of people clustering in the middle of the room to make your way to the infirmary. It was too late for the nurse to be there, but the room itself was never locked, you knew, so you turned the door handle without a second thought and dragged what remained of Viktor inside. 

Viktor sat on one of the cots, lifting his head up with what you assumed was the intention to stop the bleeding. 

“Don’t do that; the blood is going to end up in your throat." You said as you grabbed a towel and placed it in front of his face, “Pinch right there—yes, there you go." You continued gently nudging his head forward with your other hand. You noticed the bleeding was also coming out of a small cut on the bridge of his nose, so you needed to find some gauze. You heard Viktor sigh audibly behind you as you rummaged through the drawers. 

“Care to explain?”

Silence 

“Viktor, what happened?” You said this time, looking at him. He closed his eyes and breathed in. 

“I got punched in the face; I believe you’re smart enough to figure that out.”

“Color me shocked!” You said in a sardonic hiss. “By whom and why?” You said punctuating each question with an ironic stare at the same time as you soaked a small piece of gauze in saline solution. Viktor winced slightly at the pain. 

“That vacuous donkey, and I suppose he was unhappy as a consequence of me preventing him from following you into the bathroom.” 

“Asher?” He chuckled at how fast you got to his name with only that description. “Why would he follow me into the bathroom?”

“Judging by my state, I think you can presume I did not ask any questions.”

Although your knitted frown made it seem like you were upset, it was confusion that bounced all over the walls of your skull. 

“Why?” You managed to ask, finally.

“I’ve already said—“

“No, why did you do it? It simply doesn't make any sense to me that you would put yourself in jeopardy for me.”

Silence once again. 

“A jumbled mess, selfish, intolerable, and big-headed, remember?”

Silence. 

“I don’t actually believe you are most of those things.” Viktor started in a timid voice. “You are not selfish; eh, I suppose I feel a sense of longing for the time in my life where I would take risks the way that you are allowed to do now. I envy that freedom, that’s all.”

The hand you had holding his face in place had long dropped to hold the edge of the cot firmly. 

“I do think you are a mess, but that carefree nature you have is not something negative necessarily,” he continued when you gave no signs of interjecting, “and when I said big-headed, I meant to say stubborn.”

“Oh.” A small smile creeped up the corners of your mouth. “I thought you meant I have a big head.”

“I can assure you that you have a normal-sized head.” Viktor said with a lighthearted chuckle. “But you are, in fact, very stubborn.”

“Fair.” 

A comfortable atmosphere washed over as you went back to disinfecting his wound. The bleeding had stopped both from his nose and the cut, so you rummaged through the drawers once more to find some medical tape to patch him up. 

“To be fair, I also don’t believe you are most of the things I said yesterday.”

“The things you said before we slept together, or during?” You rolled your eyes. 

“Before.”

Viktor hummed, a small smirk on his dry-blood-tinted lips.

“So I’m a tad more tolerable to you than I thought, but getting into a fight for me still feels unbelievable.”

Viktor inhaled sharply before giving you a defeated look. 

“I can tell you are trying to make me say it, and I don’t appreciate that.” 

“Say what?” He looked at you with one eyebrow raised and a long silence, slowly letting it sink in. You were dumbfounded. He couldn’t possibly mean it, but then again, if the previous night did something, it was proving your attraction to him was mutual, and now knowing he does not in fact have the deep aversion to you that you were certain he did, it all fit into an odd puzzle perfectly. 

To him, the long, numb silence you had fallen into as your mind followed your convoluted line of reasoning had come off as a cold but polite rejection.

“Naturally, everything was likely circumstantial on your part, and I understand that,” he started saying as he stood up. “You were heavily intoxicated that night at Lara’s house…” 

“What? No Viktor—“ You started to say this as you moved out of his way.

“...and I appreciate how well you dealt with what transpired at the lab. I do apologize; however, I should have put my feelings in check and known it was a terrible idea...” Every word he uttered left his mouth louder than the last, and you could hear the tension in his voice as he tried to find the correct string of words to use. Around the last few words, you heard his volume deplete, and before he even finished speaking, his nose started bleeding again. 

“Viktor, stop! You are bleeding again— settle down for fucks sake!” Anything you could have said would’ve been useless, as he seemed to not hear any word that came out of you at that moment. He leaned against the wall, and the blood trickled down his mouth like delicately embroidered stitches over his lips.

“...my care should have extended to what happened yesterday; deep down, I knew it wouldn’t be a casual slip-up and an easy-to-forget mistake as it probably is for you, yet I couldn’t hold back—though it was entirely my fault. I recognize that, and I won’t hold it against you…” 

It wasn’t that for you either. You said so out loud and tried to convince yourself of that much, but it was not the truth—another well-crafted lie that came porcelain cold and perfect through your teeth. The thin stream of red percolated all the way to his neck. You wanted to say so much, but only lying came easy to you; lies were far and detached, and telling Viktor how you felt seemed too near and vulnerable, too constricting. His eyes now looked at you, not expecting an answer but simply giving himself a break, glossy and distant but still vibrantly golden. You remembered the dreams you had the night before, and they fueled whatever timid wish you had in you. Sure, you couldn’t say something, but you could show him. 

The room was narrow enough that the step forward you took was small. You had him pinned against the wall, although not of your own volition, and that aided you in finding a firm grip on the sides of his face before you met his lips with your own. You almost second-guessed yourself when you initially felt no struggle, thinking he must have been so weak from the loss of blood that he hadn’t been able to wriggle himself out of your grasp. A metallic taste creeped its way into your mouth when Viktor’s fingers slithered their way to your jaw, softly prying it open to make way for his tongue. 

You tasted his lips for a long while before you both had to grasp for air, Viktor being particularly in need of a break. Endearment peaked through his eyes as he unsuccessfully tried to wipe the bloody tint off your mouth and chin, and you both laughed quietly at the vampiric state of your faces, a picture painted by your silent confession to him. You could have said something then and even had something in mind, but your plans were spoiled by the dry sound of Jayce clearing his throat in an attempt to make himself known. 

You know there was nothing you could have said that would serve as an excuse for what happened, and no well-told lie could have steered Jayce’s mind away from the murder scene on your faces; thus, against what you would’ve normally done, you stayed quiet. Viktor did too. 

“Just so we’re clear, I always suspected.” He said, an eyebrow raised on his forehead as a sign of satisfaction. 

“Is it a prize you want? A pat on the back? A handshake?” Viktor said only half-annoyed, his mood unable to be ruined by any of Jayce’s brazen commentary.

“Do you mind?”

“Alright, I’m going. Just don't do it here; it’s so unsanitary.” He quickly left the room, only a millisecond away from being hit by a bloody towel thrown in his direction. One of the small pieces of gauze you still had on hand was enough to clean both of you up, and you helped each other out among light giggles and child-like mischief, followed by another small kiss to seal the deal. 

“How about a proper date?” You asked as you handed Viktor more cotton pads to replace the now-drenched one in his nose. “We could go to the café from last time.”

“I refuse; I won’t be able to look at that waitress's face without wanting to be swallowed by the ground with embarrassment.”

“How dramatic.” You said, rolling your eyes playfully, and Viktor shook his head.

“My dorm tomorrow, we can cook something; I’ve come to find out I rather enjoy it.”

“Why yours? Do you still think my dorm is messy?”

“Yes.” Your hand shot up to clutch your imaginary pearls in an inflated expression of fake outrage.

“Have you considered that if I keep going to yours, it will end up untidy as well?” You smirked at Viktor’s defeated expression.

“Fine.” He said with a loud, frustrated groan, followed by a mellow grin. 

#viktor #arcane viktor #viktor arcane #viktor fanfic #viktor x reader

[queenshelby]

The Director (Part Eight)

Pairing: Cillian Murphy x Reader

Warning: Infidelity, Domestic Abuse, Violence

The following morning, you successfully sneaked from Cillian's room back to yours to have a shower and get ready for work, making sure that no one caught you.

You were stunned at what you had done, your actions unfathomable even for yourself.

But as you looked at your reflection in the mirror, you couldn't ignore the satisfaction and excitement that shone in your eyes. You couldn't deny it, not after last night. You felt alive again, like a woman who had rediscovered her own power and femininity.

You didn't want to admit it to yourself but, in the back of your mind, you couldn't help but compare the two men in your life now. Your husband, James, was an actor too with a privileged background. He was an arrogant, entitled, and abusive man who often used his connections to get what he wanted. On the rare occasion he made you sleep with him, he only ever cared about his needs and rarely bothered to listen to yours. You would lie there, feeling degraded, questioning if this was truly the life you wanted for yourself.

Cillian, on the other hand, was an entirely different experience. He was empathetic and kind. He treated you as an equal, cared about your desires and needs, and valued your thoughts- something that was foreign and refreshing in this world. But, at the end of the day, Cillian was also a taken man, and you had to remind yourself that what you had between the two of you wasn't necessarily love, but a fleeting passion that would eventually fade.

You splashed cold water on your face, feeling the sting of reality setting in. You could not let yourself get carried away, you had responsibilities to attend to, namely your children and your career. 

As you walked towards set however, the sounds of the set buzzing with activity, you couldn't help but think back to last night. The way Cillian's eyes had burned with lust, the way he had touched you, kissed you; it had felt like fireworks going off inside you.

Your stomach clenched just thinking about it, your body reacting to the memories. It wasn't just the sex either, although God, that had been amazing. It was the way he had looked at you, the way he had talked to you, like you were the only person in the world that mattered in that very moment.

But of course, you knew that what you were doing with Cillian, was dangerous. You were married, after all, to a man who had the power and influence to ruin you both with one phone call to his father, the headcof Universal Studios. James had a reputation for getting what he wanted, and he would stop at nothing to keep you in line if he was to find out.

"Y/N? Hello? Are you listening?" one of the set runners asked, interrupting your thoughts. You blinked, snapping back to reality, and turned to face the young man with a smile.

"Yes, sorry. What did you say?" You asked, feeling a twinge of guilt for letting your mind wander during work hours.

The runner looked at you curiously for a moment before repeating his question, 

"Scene 78 requires an extra, are we using the same one from yesterday?" he asked and you quickly nodded, mentally shaking off the lingering desire from the previous night.

"Yes, that's correct. Thank you for double-checking," you confirmed just before the runner nodded and hurried off to attend to his duties, leaving you to continue yours.

As you walk through the set, you couldn't help but steal glances at Cillian across the room.

He was fully engrossed in his script but occasionally looked up, meeting your gaze with a coy smile.

Eventually, when he was finished rehearsing internally, he stood up and approached you to talk.

It was small talk or work-related talk mostly throughout the day and, even in spite of his professionalism, the chemistry between you two was palpable, and neither of you could ignore it.

While the rest of the set focused on their various tasks, the two of you were in a bubble whenever you had a chat. You found yourself eagerly anticipating the opportunities when you might exchange a glance, a smile, or a brief conversation throughout the day. 

You were both fully aware of the illicit nature of the feelings that blossomed between you and, yet, you were each bound to other people, locked into toxic relationships that stifled your true selves.

But in those stolen moments with one another, even if brief, you could be free. You could be honest, and genuine, and vulnerable. You could feel the depth of your emotions, and it was terrifying, but exhilarating all the same.

"What time do you finish off?" Cillian asked quietly after he had just wrapped up his final scene for the day. His gaze fervently searched for yours, his eyes communicating something unspoken, a raw longing that caused your heart to skip a beat.

"In about an hour or so," you replied, your voice hushed. 

"Do you, uhm..." Cillian began to say and, before he even had a chance to finish his sentence, you nodded shyly.

"Yes," you whispered, looking around furtively to ensure nobody saw your exchange.

Cillian mirrored your movements, a small smile forming on his lips.

"I see you soon," he said, dropping his voice even further.

"Yes," you whispered again, smiling and blushing slightly. 

Cillian returned the smile, nodding, before turning to leave. As he walked away, you couldn't help but admire the view. His lean figure was accentuated by his fitted jeans and a black t-shirt, and the sight made your heart race. You shook yourself slightly, trying to refocus on your job just as Emily came swinging by.

"Checking out Cillian's rear end?" she said while giving you a sly smile and, immediately, you blushed, realizing that you had been caught. 

"Me?" you asked, feigning innocence. "No, of course not."

Emily chuckled and raised an eyebrow at you. "Oh, come on, don't play coy with me," she said. "I've seen the way you look at him and it's perfectly fine," she laughed, giving me a knowing wink.

"I don't know what you're talking about," you said, feeling my cheeks grow hot.

"Uh-huh," Emily responded, grinning from ear to ear. "Well, I'll leave you to it then. Don't do anything I wouldn't do," she added with a wink before sashaying away.

Was it this obvious, you wondered, your heart racing in your chest. But then again, you concluded, why would it matter? You were allowed to 'window shop around' as Emily so politely put it. No one knew that you were actually trying on the goods without committing to purchase.

Later that evening, after you finished up for the day, you went to your room to freshen up before, once again tippy-toeing your way to Cillian's suite.

This time, he greeted you with a soft, inviting kiss while, at the same time, pulling you inside and you were quick to shut the door behind you.

"So this," you whispered against his lips as his arms wrapped around your waist, holding you close, "is going to be a regular thing then?" 

Cillian nipped lightly at your bottom lip, eliciting a soft gasp from you as he replied, "If that's what you want, then yes."

"Yes," you murmured back before you leaned into him, feeling the warmth of his body against yours. Your hands found their way up his chest, feeling his heartbeat through the fabric of his shirt. Cillian's hands roamed down to your hips, his grip firm and confident.

"Good," he added, pulling back to look into your eyes. "But we need to be careful. We can't let this become a scandal," he told you and you nodded, understanding the gravity of the situation.

"I know," you whispered. "There is too much to lose," you acknowledged the unspoken fears between you both.

Cillian leaned in and kissed you softly. "There is," he murmured against your lips, "too much to lose," he confirmed, but even as he said it, he couldn't resist the pull you had on him. He wrapped his arms around you, deepening the kiss, his tongue exploring your mouth.

You responded eagerly, your arms snaking around his neck as you stood on tiptoe to get closer. You were lost in the moment, your body buzzing with desire, and the rest of the world faded away.

"You are so good at this," you murmured against his lips, pulling back just enough to speak.

Cillian smiled against your mouth, his lips brushing against yours as he spoke. "Well, you do bring out the best in me," he chuckled, although you could hear the sincerity in his voice and feel it too, in his touch.

As you stood there, wrapped up in each other, you couldn't help but think about how difficult it would be to tear yourself away from him. But you knew that you would have to, sooner or later.

For now, though, you just wanted to revel in the moment and indulge in the pleasure that Cillian offered so willingly. You traced your fingers over the ridges of his abdomen, feeling the muscles tighten under your touch. Cillian groaned softly, his grip on you tightening as he pulled you closer.

You could already feel his erection press against your stomach through the denim of his jeans. 

You wanted to tear his clothes off and devour him then and there, but something told you to slow down and enjoy every moment of this forbidden weakness.

You pulled away gently, taking a step back to look at him. He looked so handsome, standing there with a slightly flushed face and half-lidded eyes. His hair was disheveled from your hands running through it, and his lips looked swollen from your kisses.

"What?" he

asked, his voice barely above a whisper. His eyes searched yours, looking for any indication as to why you had pulled away.

"I just - god you are so handsome," you said, biting your lower lip as your gaze lingered on his defined jawline.

Cillian took a step forward, closing the gap between the two of you.

"Fuck, I don't do well with compliments, but I am glad you think so," he murmured, reaching out to gently brush a strand of hair away from your face.

His touch sent a shiver down your spine, and you found yourself inching closer to him, your body craving his touch.

"Well, you better get used to it," you murmured, your voice low and sultry. "Because I plan on giving you plenty more compliments."

Cillian's eyes darkened with desire, and he stepped closer to you, his lips brushing against your ear as he spoke.

"I'll hold you to that," he whispered, his breath hot against your skin.

Your heart skipped a beat, and you could feel yourself growing wetter by the second.

Cillian's grip on your hip tightened, as if he was trying to steady himself on the rocking ship that your senses had become. The tension between you two was palpable, and the anticipation of what was sure to be an unforgettable night was almost unbearable.

You pulled yourself away from Cillian's grasp, taking a deep breath before walking to the bed. Slowly, seductively, you removed your clothing, watching as Cillian's gaze followed your every movement.

"What are you waiting for?" you asked, your voice a husky whisper that made Cillian's heart race. He didn't need any further encouragement.

He crossed the room, closing the distance between you in two strides. He wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you close and claiming your lips with a fierce, passionate kiss. You sank into him, your body trembling with anticipation as you quickly pulled on the hem of his t-shirt, tugging it over his head.

Cillian broke the kiss long enough to pull his t-shirt over his head before sweeping you off your feet and pushing you onto the bed. You giggled, the sound light and airy as he trailed kisses down your neck.

You could feel the tension building between you, your breath hitching as he slowly kissed a path down your chest, pausing to lavish attention on your breasts before continuing his journey downwards.

You arched into his touch, your hands weaving through his hair as you held him close, relishing the feel of his lips on your skin. Every touch, every kiss, sent jolts of pleasure coursing through your body, and you knew that this was going to be a long night.

Cillian's fingers danced over your skin as he explored your body, his touch igniting flames of desire that threatened to consume you both.

"Spread your legs for me," he growled, his voice a low rumble that sent shivers down your spine.

You eagerly obeyed, parting your thighs as he settled himself between them. His gaze was conflicting, yearning to savor every moment of what he was about to do, but also greedy for more.

He teased you with gentle strokes, lingering at your entrance before pulling back. You couldn't wait any longer, your body craved his touch, so you lifted your hips, urging him to give you what you needed.

Cillian didn't disappoint. He slid a finger inside you, then two, his pace increasing as he felt you grow wetter and wetter. Your moans filled the room, the sound of your pleasure spurring him on. He watched your face as you writhed on the bed, your back arching beautifully as he pushed you closer and closer to the edge.

"Please, Cillian," you begged, unable to form a coherent sentence as wave after wave of pleasure coursed through your body.

His mouth soon joined  his fingers, and you felt your legs tremble as he expertly brought you to the brink of release. You called out his name, your fingers gripping the sheets beneath you, desperately trying to hold on to some semblance of control.

But it was too late. The tension inside you snapped, and you cried out loudly as your orgasm washed over you, leaving you a quivering, boneless mess.

Cillian crawled up to you, kissing you softly as you came back down to earth.

The taste of your release on his lips only heightened your desire for him, and you wrapped your arms around his neck, deepening the kiss.

Cillian pulled away, his gaze intense as he whispered, "I want to be inside you."

You nodded, unable to form actual words as you eagerly spread your legs wider, inviting him in. Cillian finally removed his jeans, followed by his briefs, both in haste, before 

settling himself between your thighs. He was heavily aroused, and you couldn't help but admire his body.

"Cillian," you whispered, reaching up towards him. He lowered himself onto you, his weight a comforting presence as he claimed your lips in a passionate kiss. You could feel his arousal nudge at your entrance, and you wrapped your legs around his waist, pulling him closer.

Cillian entered you gently, his movements slow and deliberate as he took in the sighs and whimpers of your pleasure.

Your bodies fit together perfectly, completely synchronized as he moved inside you. Your hips rose to meet his every thrust, your breath hitching as he drove deeper, harder, faster.

Your fingers traced patterns on his back, pulling him closer with each thrust as your legs tightened around him. His movements were fluid, deliberate, as he pistoned in and out of you. The sound of skin slapping against skin filled the room, accompanied by the guttural moans and pants that escaped both of you.

Eventually, you pushed him off and then underneath you, seeking to take charge. Cillian seemed surprised for a moment but then gave in to your enthusiasm.

You rode him, your hips grinding and swaying in powerful, erotic motions. The sight of you taking him like that had Cillian begging for mercy, but you merely smirked and quickened the pace.

As you approached climax, your body buckled, and you uttered a garbled cry, your head thrown back with pleasure. Cillian was not far behind, his own internal battle lost as he beneath released a guttural yell.

"Fuck, Y/N," he groaned, his eyes screwed shut and body stiffening as he came. You slammed yourself down on him one final time, depositing the last fraction of pleasure in a shockwave through your still-tingling body.

Your bodies, both slick with sweat and panting heavily, refused to separate, maintaining that intimate bond still long after the two of you had reached your climax. You sat there, motionless, floating in an abyss of euphoric bliss until, suddenly, you gasped and rolled off him.

"Oh my god I just had an idea," you excitedly declared, while he looked at you dumbfoundedly, his body still spent from the substantial ninety-minute lovemaking session.

You jumped off the bed completely and started pacing, muttering and mumbling your thoughts aloud. he asked with a puzzled look on his face.

"It's for the movie!" you shrieked, a triumphant smile spreading across your features. "For the scene between you and Flo tomorrow," you elaborated, and Cillian looked at you quizzically for a moment, still basking in the post-coital fog.

"You just had an idea for a sex-scene that I am in with another woman," he chuckled while, slowly, sitting up in bed. "Right after we had sex," he then pointed out , shaking his head in slight disbelief as if weighing up whether or not to be entertained by this sudden turn of events.

You stopped your pacing and looked at him, that unwavering determination in your eyes. "Yes," you confirmed, nodding, and then letting out a slightly embarrassed laugh. "Just hear me out, okay?" you told him before outlining the particular changes to him, hoping that Christopher Nolan would agree with your ideas.

Cillian listened attentively, nodding along as you spoke before throwing out his own thoughts on the scene. His voice was calm and gentle, his tone easy as he expressed his frustration over how the scene felt forced and artificial the first time it was filmed, which is why Chris himself was unhappy with it as well, requesting a re-shoot. 

"Exactly!" you exclaimed, causing his eyes to light up in surprise before a knowing smile spread across his face. "But, let's just see what Chris thinks of this new approach first before I get too carried away with all this" you told him, although the excited gleam in your eyes betrayed your true thoughts.

Cillian just smiled at you, amused by your enthusiasm and completely taken by your passion and creativity. It was just another endearing facet to the complex character that was you. Always caring, always determined, and hardly ever backing away from a challenge.

You spent the night with Cillian again that night, enjoying his closeness even while you were asleep, wrapped in his arms until your alarm went off at 4 o'clock. 

You got up, feeling content and full of energy. Today was going to be an exciting day but, just as you tried to silently sneak out of Cillian's room, you ran into Emily in the hallway. 

You froze, a wave of guilt washing over you as you tried to think up an excuse for retreating from Cillian's room at around 4.15am for which, of course, there was none.

Your hair was messy, as if you had just woken up which, of course, you did. You even smelled of him, his aftershave and natural scent from the night you shared. 

Emily opened her mouth, arguably about to interrogate you on why you were sneaking out of your colleague's room, but you cut her off with an innocent smile.

"Hi, Em. I was, uhm... I couldn't sleep so...," you began to say, causing her to giggle.

"My lips are sealed," she chuckled, quite literally making a zipper motion over her lips. "I didn't see anything," she added sheepishly, retracting the zipper and smile mischievously at you.

Your cheeks flushed and, once again, you were struck with that overwhelming feeling of guilt. 

"Thank you, Em," you replied, low and barely above a whisper before you hurried away from her, feeling both embarrassed and anxious about having been caught.

You knew that Emily would keep this to herself, but you couldn't quite shake off the guilt that gnawed at you.

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