#who gave this chipmunk a gun!? | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

chaotic-super · 1 year

Text

For Her Sake - Chapter 3

Read For Her Sake on Ao3 here!

Kara is so out of sorts from the events that have transpired that she’s barely even paying attention to where she’s going, tripping up the stairs twice on her way to the apartment.

She’s never felt more like a failure and she’s not sure whether it’s because the plan didn’t work, or because she was just exposed as a mother who can barely provide for her child to one of the richest people on the planet, someone so successful that she could just sit at home in her mansion doing nothing for the next thousand years without getting through even half of the money she has.

Either way, she should be grateful that her pride is the only thing to take a major hit tonight. Lena Luthor was right in regard to how stupid she’s been, how idiotic her plan was and how she could have very easily just deprived her own daughter, her pride and joy, of her presence in her life, of her mother.

That’s the one thing Kara can never let happen. They can lose everything but as long as they have each other, they will always be ok. Kara used to dream of her own parents after they passed and she always thought of that, of what she would be willing to trade to have them back and how she could be stripped of everything and she would be happy as long as she had them.

She didn’t get to make that deal before, after all, the dead are gone, but she can make that choice now. The choice to live with what they have and to be grateful to have each other.

She fidgets, reaching into her pocket for her keys and goes to grab them. In order to do so she passes the note from her right hand to her left and she actually looks at what had been pressed into her hand.

Kara almost drops it in fright, her heart suddenly pounding almost as hard as it did when she had a gun trained on her not long ago.

After she just tried to kidnap Lena and hold her for ransom, the woman just gave her four one hundred dollar bills, two fifties and two twenties. Lena Luthor just gave her everything out of her wallet, she just gave her enough money to pay for groceries and to get Lori a proper present for her birthday next month. Her little chipmunk will be five and she deserves to get something special.

She stuffs all but the twenties into her pocket and slides her key into the lock, tiptoeing inside so she doesn’t wake Alex and Lori.

The door gets deadbolted, this is a rough area and it’s their only real form of protection from anyone with any kind of malicious intent.

“Kara?” Alex’s hushed voice calls out, sleep still present in the way her words croak in her throat.

Through the darkness of the apartment, Kara can just about make out Alex’s form on the couch, lying across it lengthways and spread out as much as she can on the cushions.

“Yeah, it’s me. Go back to sleep, Alex.” Kara whispers, kicking off her shoes and pushing them aside with her ankle.

“Any issues helping out with the move?” Alex pushes herself up into more of a seated position, making a little bit of space for Kara to perch by her feet.

Kara takes the space, grateful to be sitting down, her knees feel weak with the adrenaline of everything happening finally starting to ease its way out of her body. “Nope, everything went ok. I’m just tired now. I got forty bucks for helping out.”

“I’m sorry, Kara.” By the tone of Alex’s voice, Kara already knows the look that must be written across her face, the one she does when she’s feeling guilty and beating herself up for something that isn’t her fault in the slightest.

Kara reaches over Alex’s legs, searching for her hand. “You have nothing to be sorry for.”

“You’ve been working overtime every day and picking up these weird jobs and being exhausted all the time. I can barely stay on my feet for more than ten or fifteen minutes and I feel so useless, I just want to help and be able to get a job again, to be able to get our lives back on track again.”

“I know. I wish we could be back where we were before too. Did you call up about the hospital bill? About seeing if you can get your insurance to cover some more of it?”

Alex’s hand holds Kara’s tight. “I tried, they said there’s nothing they can do.”

Rubbing a hand over her brow, Kara tries to think of something else to help them out, something legal this time. “Ok. I’m going to go call again tomorrow and try and put some pressure on them to see if they crack then. Let’s exhaust all of our options twice and see if we can find some wiggle room somewhere, something to work with.”

“Ok, but first, go and eat something and get some rest.”

Kara clicks her phone on, taking a look at the time and cringing, she isn’t going to get much sleep now, only a few hours until she’ll have to get up to get Lori ready for school. “Ew, tomorrow is going to suck.”

“Change your alarm, I’ll get Lori ready and take her to school tomorrow, then you can get some extra sleep.”

“Alex, it’s a twenty-minute walk both ways.”

Alex is quiet for a beat. “I’ll make it work. I’ll take my crutches just in case but I will make it work. Please, I have to do something other than watch my baby sister work herself to the bone just to come home and sleep for a couple of hours and then get right back to it.”

“You’ll call and wake me up if you’re struggling so I can come and help you?”

“I will, I promise.” Alex smiles to herself in relief, so glad that Kara is too tired to put up much of a fight so she can finally get out of this place and not feel so useless. She has a couple of resumes printed out too so if she’s feeling up to it, she can drop them in at a few of the businesses on the way back from the school, something Kara hasn’t been letting her do because she’s worried she’ll overexert herself and make her injuries worse. “Now, go and eat and get cleaned up so you can go to bed, there’s a little girl waiting to be snuggled by her mom.”

Kara snorts out a little laugh. “I don’t have to look to know that that little girl is starfishing across that bed and that I’m going to have to shove her back over onto her side to get in.”

“That little angel wouldn’t do that.” Alex smiles, looking through the dark over to the bed where a little lump is sleeping soundly beneath the duvet.

Kara snickers. “Then why didn’t you get in with her? I told you that I’d take the couch tonight.”

“She looked too peaceful to move, I’d rather you be the bad cop in that scenario,” Alex admits, fully aware of the soft spot in her heart for her niece.

“I knew it.” Kara stands, heading for the kitchen and turning on the tiny lap they have in there, the one that is the dimmest so they don’t accidentally wake Lori up with it when they are up late.

She opens up the cupboard, picks up a pack of ramen and makes a mental note to use some of the cash Lena gave her on groceries tomorrow on the way home.

Looking over at her sister, she can see that she’s falling asleep again so she gets her food ready as quietly as she can and shovels it into her face as soon as it’s done, searing off some of her taste buds in the process from how hot it is.

After a quick pitstop to the bathroom, Kara finds herself nudging Lori across the bed and wrapping her arms around the little one, eyes falling closed as soon as her head hits the pillow.

The buzzing of Kara’s phone wakes her up, a sound she absolutely despises.

Forcing herself to roll over and get it is only the first difficult task of the day but is definitely the hardest one she’s facing.

With her alarm off, she looks around the apartment and sighs into the quiet. With Alex and Lori gone it feels empty and wrong.

It does help her get ready quickly though, especially since she doesn’t have a child to appease or to try and follow her into the bathroom while she’s trying to do her morning business or shower.

She’s out of the door in no time, the cash she got from Lena sitting safely in her wallet ready for her trip to the store later and set for making her way to work, luckily it’s just a quick bus ride away.

Kara gets off the bus one stop early to drop into Noonan’s and get herself and her boss, Cat Grant, coffee, something she’s been in desperate need of since she woke up but to save on money, she waits for the one she can get on the company’s dime, rather than having one at home first.

She beats her boss into work with plenty of time to spare and uses the few extra minutes to get her desk looking presentable and to get Ms Grant’s schedule straightened out and ready for her arrival, masking everything that’s going on at home. If she lets on to her struggles then Ms Grant might not think she’ll be capable of taking on the increased workload that comes with being a reporter, her dream job, and it might just cost her the promotion she’s been working towards for years.

The best part about her job is that she has gaps in her work where she can fill the time sorting out her own affairs between sorting out Cat’s and so when her boss is off to attend a board meeting and requests that she stay back and to not interrupt her unless her business is crumbling, she uses the time to find an empty corner in the building and call up the hospital billing desk to try for the thousandth time to get them to agree to a lower upfront payment and to spread out the payment plan more so she can pay less each month, giving them more space to breathe.

“Hi, this is Kara Danvers calling in regard to the bill for Alexandra Danvers’ treatment, I would like to see if I can change the monthly rate.”

“Hello, Ms Danvers.” A surprisingly friendly voice greets her. She’s not spoken to anyone with such a friendly attitude in the billing department before. “I’m afraid I can’t lower the monthly rate because it looks like the debt has been paid in full, there are no monthly payments to be made.”

Kara’s jaw drops. What in the world is going on? “I’m sorry, I think I misheard, for a second there I thought you said that the bill has been paid.”

“It has, Ms Danvers. There are no bills due on your account. All debt has been paid off in full and the next six months’ physical therapy sessions have been prepaid.”

There’s a lump in Kara’s throat and “What? Can I ask who paid it?”

“I’m sorry, Ms Danvers, that’s confidential, all I can tell you is that it was confirmed as of eight AM today.”

A smile of pure relief and months’ worth of agony being released makes its way onto Kara’s face, tears welling up in her eyes. “Thank you, thank you so much.”

“You’re welcome, Ms Danvers, have a lovely day.”

“You too,” Kara replies, hanging up the phone and holding it to her chest, trying to collect herself. Alex is going to be ecstatic about this, it means that without that bill hanging over them, they will be able to catch up on bills, pay off their debts and save up for a deposit to move somewhere better. They could be out of the shitty apartment within a few months.”

There isn’t much of a mystery about who paid off the bill. There is only one person with that much money that she’s interacted with in the past twenty-four hours that knows what’s going on and that woman is Lena Luthor. She owes that woman her life at this point.

This isn’t news she can share with Alex over the phone, she needs to speak to her in person to tell her the good news and figure out how to explain why her bill has been paid without telling her why it has been paid, without telling her what she tried to do, she could never look Alex in the eye again if she knew what she tried to pull.

“Hey, Kara, you alright?”

Kara jumps and turns around quickly only to see her best friend, Winn Schott, standing behind her, a dorky smile on his face. “Never better, Alex’s hospital debt has been cleared.”

“What? Kara, that’s great news!” Winn scoops her up into a hug. “I knew you could talk those insurance people around into covering it, this means you’ll be able to move back to the good side of town, right?”

Kara grins. “Hopefully soon, I have a few other debts to pay off first but once that’s covered and I have enough money for a security deposit, we’ll be able to move somewhere better, probably not as nice as we were living before but nicer than this. Things are looking up.”

“I’m so happy for you guys, I have hated not being able to help.”

Kara smacks his arm lightly. “Winn, you changed your entire schedule to start your day early and leave early so you can go and get Lori from school and drop her off at home. You’ve done more for us than I can thank you for.”

“It’s nothing, I like spending time with my niece anyway and I like being the favourite over Alex because I get her ice cream sometimes.”

“You do what? I never knew that!” Kara exclaims.

Winn just laughs at her. “Well yeah, because you’d tell me not to.”

Kara isn’t mad at all, in fact, she’s immensely grateful that Lori is still being able to experience at least a few of the things they can’t afford to do anymore and the time she spends with Winn is one of the things that has been constant throughout everything and from what Winn has told her before, Lori really opens up to him and tells him a lot about how much she misses her dad, something she doesn’t like to speak about to anyone else.

“I don’t mind. I’m glad she has you.”

“And I’m glad to have all of you Danvers women in my life. Lori is my favourite by a mile though.”

Kara rolls her eyes at him. “I’m under no illusions that she is, she’s my favourite too.”

Winn smiles at her and starts walking back across the bullpen to his desk. “She’s a good kid, now you better get back to work before Ms Grant comes back and murders you for leaving your desk.”

“Good idea.” Kara agrees, taking a seat at her own desk and filtering through emails, getting back to work so to try and make time go quicker so she can get home and share the good news. Winn has given her the perfect excuse for why the debt is paid. She can just say that she got the insurance to cover it, tonight is going to be the best night they’ve had in weeks.

In the meantime though, between actual work and clock-watching, she does one more thing. Kara orders a bunch of flowers to be delivered to the L-Corp building, specifically to the office of the one and only, Lena Luthor. She adds a note to the order too, it’s the absolute minimum she can do but it’s better than nothing.

She wants to make it a super fancy bouquet but she’s still got to be sensible, times are still tight and she still has to pay not only this month’s rent but also that of last month that she didn’t manage to pay. She gets a simple bouquet instead and hopes it will do the trick.

There’s one main message she needs to get to Lena and the note is going to say it for her.

Ms Luthor,

I owe you and I can’t thank you enough. If there’s anything I can do to repay you, name it.

Kindest of regards,

Kara Danvers.

She wants to write more, to write a whole essay detailing how much this means to her and profusely apologise for what she tried to take part in but there doesn’t seem to be enough words to truly encapsulate the magnitude of the emotions coursing through her.

With the order submitted and the confirmation email in her inbox, she knows she can sleep happy tonight with a big portion of her stress taken off of her shoulders and a little thank you gift to Lena planned for tomorrow, she focuses on her work, being more focused and presenting the best work she’s done in a long time to the point where even Cat comments on it when she gets back from her meeting.

Kara gets into her work so deeply that Winn makes her jump for the second time in one day when he comes up to tell her that he’s leaving for the day. “I’m going to go and get the munchkin, Kara. I’ll see you tomorrow.

“Thanks, Winn. Can you actually do me an extra favour?”

Winn is accepting before she can even say what it is, sliding his arms into the sleeves of his coat as he does so. “Yeah, of course, I can.”

“Can you check on Alex? She took Lori to school this morning and I haven’t heard from her to see how it went.”

“Good for her, getting back out there. I’ll let you know how she is when I get home.”

Kara is so very grateful for her friend. Not as grateful as she is for the woman who just paid off their mountain of medical debt but still grateful nonetheless. “You’re the best.”

“I know.”

Read more chapters early on Patreon here!

#cw supergirl #supercorp endgame #supergirl #supercorp #kara leaned in #kara x lena #kara danvers #kara zor el #lena luthor #supercorp fanfic #chaotic super #fanfiction #fluff #fanfic #wlw ship #lesbian fiction #For Her Sake #single parent au

37 notes · View notes

jungle-angel · 1 year

Text

Cottagecore/Rusticore Prompts

It’s the dead of winter and spring fever is starting to bite. I know I haven’t put up a prompt list in a while, I’m hoping something comes of this. Taking requests for the usual, Top Gun Maverick, Outer Range, Salem’s Lot, Bad Times at the El Royale, Catch 22 (Hulu) and Press Play. Yellowstone is included but will be crossed over with Outer Range.

1. Pressing the flowers their s.o gave them

2. Patchwork quilts

3. Knitting or crocheting a baby blanket

4. “I made you a little something this morning”

5. Herbal medicine

6. Helping tend to the goats, cows, chickens, pigs etc.

7. Feral forest children

8. Digging through their s.o’s old book collection in the book barn

9. “Herein dwell the Fae”

10. Night walk in the woods with a lantern

11. Who’s gonna ride your wild horses?

12. A huge tree in the middle of the woods

13. Sunny summer morning

14. The creaky old porch rocker

15. Mason jars full of sweet peach tea sitting in a sunny windowsill

16. Their little one playing in the tall grass while Momma is busy picking flowers and vegetables from the garden

17. Funny familiars

18. Watching a summer thunderstorm roll in on the porch

19. The kids eating their weight in wild berries

20. Their s.o gaining the reputation of a woods witch

21. Riding the horses through the river

22. Packing their s.o’s lunch in their field bag

23. Running barefoot in the grass

24. Their s.o working on a little project in the woodshop

25. The kids playing with the handmade toys from you, your s.o and their parents

26. Calling the birds and animals

27. Finding a fairy ring in the woods

28. Music under the moon

29. The old wooden swing where you now push your children

30. Lying on a blanket with your s.o and your baby to watch the wild horses or the buffalo herds near the river

31. Looking up at the clouds and trying to see their shapes

32. The rooster following their s.o instead of the hens

33. The cats nesting in the window or in weird places

34. “Oh no, you get yourself in that bath this instant!”

35. Finding the chicks, baby rabbits, squirrels or chipmunks in the weirdest places

36. Taking care of baby animals

37. The garden after a rainstorm

38. Playing in the rain

39. Early morning walk

40. Flower chain

41. Fixing their s.o’s clothes

42. Putting the little one to sleep in an old wood cradle

43. Watercolors

44. The cat sleeping in the cradle with the little one or the dog sleeping nearby

45. The family sleeping near the woodstove in cold weather

46. Memorizing all the Viking and Indian calls for the animals

47. The cat playing with the ball of yarn

48. Swimming in the river on a hot summer day

49. Sleeping with the windows open to hear the peepers chirping

50. Dancing in the moonlight

#top gun maverick #outer range #bad times at the el royale #salem's lot #catch 22 hulu #press play

7 notes · View notes

crowdvscritic · 2 years

Text

round up // JUNE 22

Big action! Twisty plots! They can only mean one thing: summer. Big blockbusters are back in theaters, and so am I! This month’s list of recommendations is on the short side, but there are still top 10 picks, including three movies fresh to the big screen or streaming.

June Crowd-Pleasers

1. Top Gun: Maverick (2022)

The kind of blockbuster that is making people who aren’t passionate about movies to become passionate about this movie. I’ve talked with many in the last few weeks who have said they haven’t seen or don’t like the 1986 Top Gun or action movies in general, but they all left in love with this sequel. As one who is passionate about movies and loves Top Gun, I also gotta say it took my breath away. Be sure to see it on the big screen for the ultimate thrill ride. Crowd: 10/10 // Critic: 8/10

2. Chip ’n Dale: Rescue Rangers (2022)

Apparently Rescue Rangers was a TV show starring Chip and Dale in the late ‘80s and early ‘90s—that means nothing to me. What does mean something to me: John Mulaney and Andy Samberg teaming up to voice animated chipmunks and inviting their pals (like Will Arnett, Keegan Michael-Key, Chris Parnell, Seth Rogen, Paul Rudd, J.K. Simmons, and—wait, Steve Curtis Chapman?) to join this hilarious Who Framed Roger Rabbit?-style adventure. Now make Aunt-Man, you cowards! Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 8/10

3. Double Feature—Police Action Thrillers: Chaos (2005) + Copshop (2021)

Fun fact about me: I’ll watch Jason Statham in pretty much anything, and…I’m pretty much on my way to doing that. Chaos (Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 6/10) is one of the most watchable action B-movies he’s been in (and believe me, “watchable” is higher praise for his canon than you’d think—you can only remake The Italian Job so many times). Statham, Ryan Phillippe, and Wesley Snipes lead a twisty bank robbery plot that may surprise you even with its hackneyed setup. That’s also true for Copshop (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 6.5/10), which is a twisty prison break plot Gerard Butler, Frank Grillo, and Alexis Louder turn into something fun. Pair these movies together for an afternoon of action comfort food.

4. Jurassic World Dominion (2022)

Look, we can sit around and pick at its flaws, but that is not this review. Here are three things I loved about this movie (which is part of a franchise you know I love):

Dominion is by far the most intellectually curious of the World movies, asking big questions about ethics in science, how we cope with impending disaster, and our responsibility to each other. These are all-time questions but feel especially relevant to our time in how they're presented, and I don’t think any Jurassic movie has been this curious since ’93.

It reunited my Avengers (Laura Dern, Jeff Goldblum, and Sam Neill) and gave them appropriate and consistent arcs for each of them, not just cameos! Even better, it let Goldblum be Goldblum, which was my biggest wish for this movie.

It featured some of the most fun set pieces of the World series: That chase in Malta! A triple giant dino fight! Scary locust! Even better, homages to the past and the fresh-to-the-franchise ideas were in balance.

Maybe another day I will write about the things that did not work, but I'm still reveling in the Dern and dinos at the moment. Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 7/10

5. Runaway Jury (2003)

2003: My dad dragged me to see this in theaters though I insisted I wasn't interested. To this day it is still only one of two movies I've ever fallen asleep during at the cinema. (The other was Master and Commander, which I did want to see. Apparently 2003 was a bad year for holding my attention.)

Father's Day 2022: Finally finished it with Dad! Though I’m feeling validated this movie was not for a pre-teen me, it’s quite fun for adults who understand of how juries work. Gene Hackman and Dustin Hoffman are competing to chew the most scenery, and John Cusack and Rachel Weisz may or may not be your classic John Grisham heroes to root for in this twisty conspiracy plot. PSA: I am ready for John Cusack to make a comeback at anytime. If you have any influence in the matter, I appreciate you using it to make whatever we're watching better. All team-ups with Joan welcome. Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 8/10

June Critic Picks

1. It’s Always Fair Weather (1953)

I don’t care what you say—Gene Kelly’s tap dance in roller skates here confirms my love for the terrible-yet-delightful Xanadu. The Turner Classic Movies intro informed me this was pitched as a sequel to On the Town but was reworked when Frank Sinatra and Jules Munshin were unavailable. Knowing this does make me wish the OG team could’ve reunited for that vision—the other two guys felt like filler, not like a part of a true ensemble—but I’m such a sucker for Kelly and Cyd Charisse that their dancing and the fun premise covers those weaknesses. Crowd: 7/10 // Critic: 7.5/10

2. And the Oscar Goes to… Podcast

TCM host Jacqueline Stewart is putting together a podcast about pivotal Oscar ceremonies? You don’t have to tell me twice to subscribe. Listen for insight on how the Academy Awards overlap with politics, social change, the history of film in in 1940, 1957, 1973, 2002, and more.

3. Margin Call (2011)

I can’t pretend I understand all the economic, um, stuff in this inspired-by-the-2008-financial-collapse drama, but I do understand the power of a top-notch cast to create suspense even with a clueless audience. Paul Bettany, Jeremy Irons, Demi Moore, Zachary Quinto, Stanley Tucci, and more will get you invested even if you’re like me and have zero interest in Wall Street. Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 9/10

4. Good Reads

A miscellaneous Round Up of links that appeared in my inbox and Twitter feed I’m happy to put in yours.

“The Jonas Brothers Are 'Better' Than They've Ever Been: 'We're Having the Time of Our Lives,’” People.com (2022) - I’ve never felt more seen than when People listed 100 reasons to love American and made the Jonas Brothers #1

“The 25 Most Quintessential 1980s Soundtracks, From Top Gun and Footloose to Do the Right Thing and Repo Man,” Variety.com (2022) - Because no other decade has done soundtracks like the ‘80s

“A New Golden Age Emerges for O.G. Film Stars,” HollywoodReporter.com (2022) - A follow-up of my recommendations of Top Gun: Maverick and Jurassic World Dominion

“Labor Exploitation, Explained by Minions,” Vox.com (2022) - This is a little ridiculous—few things in life deserve to be analyzed less than the Minions—but it’s so well-written I couldn’t help but get a kick out of it

“What Would You Like to Know?” Vulture.com (2022) - You know I wouldn’t scroll past a Joe Alwyn profile

“I’m Not Afraid of Stephen King Books Because I Know Maine Isn’t Real,” McSweeneys.net (2022)

“The Lord of the Rings Hobbit Stars Reunite for 'Smash It Out of the Park' Dinner,” EW.com (2022) - My heart!

5. Letter From an Unknown Woman (1948)

Joan Fontaine strikes again! Here she’s a lovesick groupie of a handsome pianist (Louis Jourdan) who basically wills a relationship with him into existence. It’s a tragic romance that will make you swoon over their affair and the gowns. Another entry on my Letterboxd list “’40s Gals Just Trying to Live Their Best Lives BUT SOCIETY.” Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 9/10

Also this June…

My Best Picture Project continues slowly but surely with How Green Was My Valley, aka the film that beat Citizen Kane for Best Picture. If this kind of movie isn’t your cup of tea, this especially slow-paced drama won’t be for you. But if historical family dramas make you feel warm and cozy, it’s worth checking out. Read my Crowd and Critic reviews.

On SO IT’S A SHOW?, Kyla and I released a new episode the HBO sitcom(?) The Comeback. What real life lawsuit may have inspired a storyline on the show? Is it possible for a show to be cringier than the character of April Nardini on Gilmore Girls? (Spoiler alert: Yes.) And what on Earth is the “that” no one wants to see? Get the documentary crew ready to follow us on our journey!

And in ep. 123, Lorelai is comparing Rory’s new apartment to an Irish memoir and a ‘70s sitcom—you know, like you do all the time. How were we introduced to these references by two modern sitcoms? What do Harry Potter actors have to do with Angela’s Ashes? Can you still go to the Sanford and Son junkyard? And are Rory’s new digs with Paris really as bad as the homes Lorelai is referencing?

#Round Up #Chaos #Copshop #Jurassic World Dominion #Runaway Jury #It's Always Fair Weather #Margin Call #Letter From an Unknown Woman #Top Gun: Maverick #Chip ’n Dale: Rescue Rangers

2 notes · View notes

dangan-writing · 3 years

Text

Anon Asked- Hey! I was wondering if I could maybe have some headcanons for Gundham, Fuyuhiko, and Kiyotaka (separately) with an S/O who has trouble eating? Like the S/O is scared they look gross when eating and sometimes doesn't want to eat because they think they look bad? I totally understand if you don't want to so don't worry! Thank you so much, and I hope you have have a good day! /gen

of Course Anon!

I hope this meets up to your expectations! if i doesn’t just tell me so i can rewrite it!

@twisted-lies

🖌мσ∂ αиgιє🖌

🐾 gυи∂нαм тαиαкα 🐾

Gundham watched as you slowly poked at your food with the fork you were holding, focusing your attention to your friend next to you blabbering on about whatever had came to their head, replying back happily, enjoying every second of the conversation you were having with your friend.

Then the question came out of your best friend’s mouth. “Hey (S/O), are you going to eat that..? you’ve been poking at it for quite a while now...” Your friend tapped their chin then pointing at your fork that was mid way into the lunch. “O-Oh it’s nothing! i’m not hungry today!” you rubbed the back of your neck shyly, a small drop of sweat rolling down your face and to your neck.

“but didn’t you say that yesterday? and the day before that? AND the day before that! is something wrong (S/O)?! please tell me you’re eating at home!” You best friend exclaimed, gripping your hands. Gundham watched from in front of both of you before speaking up

“(RANDOM NAME) is correct, your weak mortal body needs it’s recourses to keep moving on!” he exclaimed, crossing his arms. “well i just eat a lot at home and-” You get cut off by Your friend pointing the fork towards your mouth, some of the food on it. “here comes the choo choo train (S/O)!” they exclaim, their eyebrows furrowed together with a smile on their face. “n-NO!” you shoved the fork out of your face, causing it to drop on the floor

Your friend blinked at you, shocked at your sudden outburst, they were expecting you to just move your head away and they would continue teasing you. You turn back to your food and stare at it blankly, Gundham looked at you and your best friend.

“(S-S/O)...is thou okay?” he asked, focusing his gaze towards you, you nodded before looking up “i’m sorry about that, let’s just continue talking”

|---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------|

-Gundham ended up finding out you weren’t eating cause you didn’t like people seeing you eat

-he attempted to reassure you that (quote on quote) “No Mortal would dare turn their wretched gaze to thou while thou feasts”

-you found it cute and that small reassurement let Gundham see you eat

-you were nervous at first but Gundham said (again quote on quote) “that thou, seems to be in the most peaceful state while feasting, your cheeks also start looking like chipmunks when you chew” he mumbled that last part

-Gundham suggest you eat more in public

-he supports you in anyway he can

-and eventually you start eating front of a small group of your friends, trusting they won’t tease you about how you eat

-all thanks to GUNDHAM TANAKA-

👶fυуυнιкσ кυzυяуυ👶

You sat next to Fuyuhiko and Kazuichi talking to them both while poking the food with a fork, often stopping, when you had to get up to do something. Both males would look at each other and ask question why haven’t you’ve been eating? and when you would return they would quickly change the subject and act like nothing was wrong

“Heyy! (S/O)! can you try this for me! i made it myself and wanted someone to taste test it first!” Kazuichi said, holding up a small container with some food in it. Kazuichi gave a thumbs up to Fuyuhiko while the small yakuza just drank a juicebox giving him the same motion. “o-oh sorry Kazuichi i-” The pinkette quickly shoved the food into your face in hopes of you taking it and eating it, clinging on to the strand of hope that you were starving and would want to eat. “come on! my cooking is that bad is it...?!” he exclaimed

‘n-no of course not! it’s just that-” you were once again cut off by Kazuichi “then why won’t you eat it?!” he shoved the container closer to your face to the point where it was like a hand holding you back “Because i’m not hungry, Kazuichi” you attempted to remain calm, moving the container from your face.

Fuyuhiko, who was watching from a distance, sighed, taking a quick sip of the juicebox, and walking towards you both “if you want i can taste it first and you can try it after” Fuyuhiko suggests, Kazuichi stares at him as if he is holding a gun to his forehead, mouthing ‘Dude! the plan!’ Fuyuhiko shrugged and put his juicebox on the table and grabs the container full of the homemade food and took off the lid, taking the spoon from Kazuichi and dug in.

“this is amazing Kazuichi, you should cook more, here, (S/O) try some” Fuyuhiko scooped some of the food and held it in front of you mouth. “i w-would gladly try some b-but-” another moment where you can’t finish your sentence, Fuyuhiko had groaned and started nearly shouting at you “Damnit! why won’t you just eat?!” He snarled, Kazuichi behind you both sat Fuyuhiko down “maybe we should listen to them-” Now Kazuichi was the one who was cut off. “No idiot! i’m making them eat this if it’s the last thing i do, Now open your goddamn mouth!” Fuyuhiko nearly shoved the food in your mouth if it wasn’t for the fact you moved your head. The small Yakuza boy glared at you once again attempting to feed you, his stubbornness getting the best of him. “Dude leave them be! if they don’t want to eat they shouldn’t have to!” Kazuichi exclaimed, grabbed Fuyuhiko’s arm and sat him back down in his seat. “just calm down” Kazuichi patted Fuyuhiko’s back. Fuyuhiko let out a sigh and started to eat his own food again, staring up at you every once in a while.

|---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------|

-If Fuyuhiko found out that you weren’t eating because you were self conscious

-prepare for a 20 minute lecture from him on how you’re amazing and shouldn’t care about other’s opinion

-he’s now pushing you to try and eat in front of him to see if that eases you into eating in public

-”why in the world would i give a fuck about how you look when you eat? i don’t care how you eat, as long as you’re eating in general”

-any time you eat in front of him he’ll compliment you so much just to boost your self esteem

-he eventually convinces you to start eating in front of Kazuichi

-Kazuichi accidently offended you which caused Fuyuhiko to death glare him along with smack him on the back of the neck

-if someone were to insult you about how you look while eating, Fuyuhiko threatens to “dispose” of them if you know what i mean

-after a few months you can now eat in public without feeling having to focus on how others think of you

-all thanks to Fuyuhiko Kuzuryu

🧭кιуσтαкα ιѕнιмαяυ🧭

“Mr/Ms. (L/N)! it is required that all students eat at lunch since it’s against school rules to eat anywhere else!” Your friend Kiyotaka exclaimed, after watching you poke at your meal for 10 minutes “Oh i’m not hungry Taka” you smile at your friend, trying to ignore the feeling of hunger in your stomach

“but-” You cut Kiyotaka off “seriously, i’m not hungry, i ate a big breakfast at home this morning” that was a lie, you only at some pancakes and eggs along with some orange juice and you were absolutely starving, you would sometimes eat in the bathroom if your hunger got to out of hand.

Taka sighed “i guess” he muttered, looking down at his own lunch and sighed, “i’m...worried about you, you know? i never see you eat at lunch...” Taka rubs the back of his neck, looking away from you disappointed. you also looked down sadly, silence fell between you two.

|---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------|

-he eventually found out you would starve yourself during lunch

-taka nearly had a heart attack, and almost nearly cried

-he offered you

-you had turned around and eaten it so he wouldn’t see how you looked while eating

-when finally pieced together why you didn’t eat

-he takes you to the guidance councilor daily

-you became friends with your councilor and she helps you with your self esteem every day during lunch

-she encourages you to eat in front of Taka, in which you do

-he threw your self confidence through the roof with the compliments he gave you

-anytime you eat he’ll look at you and blush, telling you how cute you are when eating

-you only eat in front of Taka, and Taka only

_______________________________________________________________

Mod Angie apologizes that Taka’s was so short, i couldn’t really think of much for him

i hope you enjoy this though!

мαу αтυα вℓєѕѕ уσυя ∂αу

🖌мod Angie signing off🖌

#🖌мσ∂ αиgιє🖌#Mod Angie writes #Gundham Tanaka #Gundham Tanaka x reader #Fuyuhiko kuzuryu #Fuyuhiko kuzuryu x reader #Fuyuhiko x reader #kiyotaka ishimaru #kiyotaka x reader #Kiyotaka ishimaru x reader #gender nuetral reader

106 notes · View notes

vidkid20ssimblrlair · 3 years

Text

Episode 32: Sundown At Ashfield (Part 3)

Billy groaned. "I told you to come alone! What the hell?!"

"She's not supposed to be here," I fumed. "She must have followed me! Christ!"

"Yep," she grinned as she sat down beside me. She opened the twinkies and stuffed them in her mouth. Her cheeks budged out much like a chipmunk as she talked. "By the way, you forgot to mention some guy named, Bones visited us last night. And why is Gemma so weird? It sucks Ace lost his daughter, but that doesn't explain Gemma's wacko behavior."

"Oh, God! Were you here the whole time?!" I shrilled. "What the fuck?!"

"So you're Billy?" she smirked ignoring me. She held out her hand to him and they shook hands "I'm Audrey. Sup! The mask I saw earlier. From Naruto, right? How come they call you runt if it's a bear?"

Billy's eyes widen. "You like anime?"

"Yeah. I wish I had a manga to read, but yeah I love that stuff."

"A fellow anime fan. Also a video game fan from what I hear. I thought they all died out by now," he chuckled. "Everyone thinks my mask is a dog. When I tried to tell them where it's from and what it is, it's like I'm speaking a foreign language."

"Oh, Vince zones out when I talk about that stuff too. I know the feeling."

I scoffed. "Um...hey nerds. This conversation is quite riveting, but..."

"Woah! Wait! Are you the girl who has the samurai sword?"

"Yes. How you know?"

"I've sort of seen you before when they put me on surveillance duty once....at your house."

"What?!"

"I know it sounds creepy but...it wasn't my choice," he babbled. He then blushed. "If it makes you feel better, I thought you were super cool. I even gave you a cool name. Samurai. Hey, where is your sword if you don't mind me asking?"

She rolled her eyes and looked back at me. "And this guy is your friend?"

"Nevermind that. I know he's a creep-"

"Hey!"

"Anyway, I wasn't done asking him shit, so can you politely hush!" I growled at her. "So buddy boy, why are they watching us? Why were you put on surveillance duty at our house?!"

"Well, I didn't know it was your house at the time. All I saw was Ms. Audrey here and some woman with short brown hair, but I had no idea they were part of your group!" he cried. "I swear! If I knew I would have warned you sooner."

"Warn us of what?"

"That they plan to take your place from you. If Gemma's there, she's there to spy and fuck with you. If Ace is keeping you alive, he wants to use you. That's got to be it."

"Well, that comforting," Audrey said sarcastically.

"To answer your earlier questions about Gemma and Bones,...um Audrey?"

"That's the name."

"Well, Bones visited you to check on Gemma. Gemma was probably signaling Ace and Co. every night to show everything was fine. Then you tied her up so Bones probably came to check on her when he didn't receive any signal or indication she was fine," he said. "As for Gemma's or Red's deal, I believe she was in an insane asylum at one point."

"You're serious?" I gasped.

"It's not confirmed, but when we found her she was wearing a hospital gown over jeans with a band around her wrist. The band was pretty worn out but it indicated as such. She was also staying in a burnt-out hospital building as well. She slit the neck of one of our men when we came looking for supplies in the place. It was a big burly guy too. Ace thought it was pretty damn impressive she could take down a guy like that and he took her under his wing. He likes to think he's building some sort of army. I don't know why but people like that fit the mold for him but they do."

"Well, that's even more comforting," Audrey groaned. “Continue. I have to go to the bathroom and this willow tree is looking pretty tempting.”

“Ugh, can’t it wait?”

“No, and don’t look! You and Billy advert your eyes or something.”

“Like anyone would want to look at you anyway!”

She glared at me and stuck her tongue out playfully. She then walked over to the tree and shot us a fleeting look before disappearing behind it. I sighed and turned back to face Billy. The guy looked pretty mortified and covered his face with both hands.

“Not much experience with girls?”

“Huh?”

“Nothing. It’s getting pretty dark. Going rain.”

He turned his whole body around on the log and continued hiding his face behind his hands comically. "You probably should go then. Night and rain are a recipe for danger. And if Big Red or Gemma as you call her is at your house, it's not safe to leave your people with her. She could be up to anything. Not to mention, what Ace might have planned for you."

I nodded. "Is anything we can do?"

"I'll do my part on the inside. You? Um...well let's see. I can draw you a map of the junkyard. Provide you weapons. Anything to get the upper hand. Then we can try-"

"Enough!!!" I heard a woman shout.

I then heard muffled cries behind me. I slowly looked back to see to my horror, Billy's sister holding Audrey hostage. She had one hand on her mouth and the other aimed a gun at her head. Her face covered by a mask just like before.

"Get up!"

"Sis?" Billy yelped. "What...?"

"Shut up, Billy. Shut your mouth!" she snapped. "Now get up! Both of you!"

We did as she demanded and she took her hand away from Audrey's mouth. She used two fingers to fire off a whistle.

Then more masked figures appeared walking up to us. I looked around and realized we were now surrounded.

Part 1

Part 2

Part 4 is the last part for this one.

#sims 3 dead on arrival #ts3 dead on arrival #sims 3 doa #ts3 doa #sims 3 #ts3 #sims 3 story #ts3 story #simblr #sims 3 simblr #ts3 simblr #dead on arrival season 2 #doa season 2

9 notes · View notes

ask-roxanne-ritchi-megamind · 3 years

Text

Life in the Lair - April Fool’s Day

So, yesterday was interesting.

Megamind and I have an April Fools Day tradition that I’m sure we share with lots of other couples: PRANK WAR!

The problem, of course, is that my husband is a super-genius. Have you ever had a prank war with a super-genius? It’s even worse than the Scrabble, even though I know he goes easy on me.

Yesterday went a long way toward making everyone around me question their continued beliefs of my being a sane, reasonable person. Or at least it did for anyone I texted. Because no matter what I typed, the autocorrect feature on my phone changed it to some sort of completely BAT CRAP CRAZY statement about removing “the Curse of the Golden Wombat before the next rising of the sun,” or a suggestion to “improve the operation of your magenta dishwasher giraffe using the aromatic flavors of the number Q.” Clearly Megamind’s unexpected new phone update changed not individual words but entire sentences. The BEST part was that he coded whatever ridiculous app he created and sneaked onto my phone in such a way that, rather than changing words as I typed them, it changed them when the text was sent.

So I had NO IDEA what was going on.

Because, seriously, who goes back a reads the messages they just sent?

I texted my boss to tell him that I was driving straight to the site of the morning’s first assignment and meeting the team there because traffic was running me late. He responded with “Are you okay, Rox? You know you still have plenty of time off if you need to take some, right?”

Which left me thinking: wow. I mean, I appreciate it and all, but it’s just a little traffic. I’ll survive.

I texted a friend who works in the production department to see if she wanted to go with me to lunch that day. She replied: “LOL Roxanne! You are SO CRAZY! That is best one yet today!”

The best what yet today? And, you know, she could have just said: “no thanks.”

I texted my cousin’s husband, Raould, to see how he was feeling after knee surgery, and got back: “I’m not sure that’s a good idea. And why would you want to?”

Yeah, okay, he must be on some pretty strong pain meds. He probably sent me the reply to somebody else’s message.

It wasn’t until FIVE-FREAKING-TWENTY in the evening, when I texted Minion on my way out the door that the light finally dawned. I sent: “Heading home. Need me to pick up anything from the grocery on the way back?”

And he responded with: “I think Sir has done something to your phone, Mrs. Mind.”

Wait, what? I FINALLY checked my texts and saw that...

I’d sent my boss: “Have you seen all the massive fire-breathing narwhals in the sky today? Why don’t people just sing to their vegetables more often?! Geez!”

My friend had gotten: “Okay, but all things being equal, even the bravest of men fear two things: direct balls-punches and sporks. Especially sporks. Those things are just unnatural.”

And poor Raould, whose brain was probably already addled enough by pain pills, received: “I vote that after this we fire rubber band grenades at chipmunks and drink glitter! Valhalla!”

Along with others. So many others. In all, I’d sent twenty-two texts that day, (many of which, for obvious reasons, elicited no response,) and not a single one of them made any damn sense.

I drove home determined to punch my husband straight in the balls with a spork. Compared to this, my having filled his entire supply locker with Super Bouncy Balls so that chaos would erupt the moment he opened seemed like child’s play.

Thankfully, Minion is the real hero of this story.

An hour after I got home, Megamind marched into the dining room, where Minion was setting the table while I regaled him with the day’s horrors and little Miriel played on a blanket in the corner. My husband scowled at us, (except for Miri, of course,) and demanded:

“Why is there a painting of me, half dressed and posed like a pinup girl, on the bottom of my hoverbike?! People took photographs! They are posted online!”

My favorite fish gave him that sharp-toothed smile of his and mildly said: “April Fools, Sir!”

I got back out my phone and went looking for blackmail photos. They were as hilarious as they sound. The comments were even better. I could hardly breath past the chortles enough to gasp:

“Serves you right!”

Megamind scowled for a moment, then informed me that there was only one way to deal with this. He tossed me one of those toy foam dart guns, took aim with his own identical one, and grinned.

“May the best shot win!”

Which is why my husband and I ended the day running around the Lair, firing little bits of foam rubber at each other and howling with laughter, while Minion and Miriel cheered us on from the sidelines. (Hey, Miri may be young, but she is Megamind’s daughter. You can already hold a full conversation with the kid.) The brainbots got in on the action, too, chasing gleefully after us. I don’t think they knew what game we were playing, but they definitely knew they wanted to be involved. When all of our ammo had been lost, Megamind and I started scooping up scattered bouncy balls from the floor to hurl at each other.

As funny and playful as my Love can be when he’s not saving people and solving crimes, it’s really no wonder that I find it literally impossible to stay angry with him.

I truly love that man. And it’s a good thing, too. LOL!

#Megamind #April Fools #Megamind movie #funny #humor #Roxanne #Roxanne Ritchi #Minion #Life #Lair

16 notes · View notes

britishchick09 · 3 years

Text

danger force return of the kid livewatch

HENRY IS BACK AND IT’S TIME FOR ME TO FINALLY GET AROUND TO WATCHING IT! :D

the version i’m watching on dailymotion is slightly chipmunked and it’s adorable ^_^

awww sweetest hug ever! ♥

chapa: “don’t make me get the crowbar!” omg :o

miles: “you hate to see it” and you love to see the meme ;)

henry’s dad is graduating from an online school how 2020

CAPTAIN MAN LOVES THE HUGS!!! :D

mika: “we once caught a guy that was stealing books... FROM THE LIBRARY!” omg shocking! :o

henry just said ‘noice’ wtf mr. hart

henry spent ‘his whole childhood’ defeating people but wasn’t he like a tween when he became kid danger?

ray: “henry’s MINE now” awww :)

idk if henry can still become kid danger (i haven’t seen the henry danger finale) but i really hope he does

henry: “everyone thinks kid danger is-“ chapa: “hot?” miles: “dead?” lol

ray wants henry to pick his nail color awww :)

henry wants them to ‘handle it themselves’ does that mean he can’t transform? :o

henry just deleted ‘where are you?’ messages from charlotte HENRY DID YOU SERIOUSLY ABANDON YOUR FRIENDS FOR RAY YOU’RE NOT JOHN WITH YOKO

the audience just gave a quiet ‘aww’ when henry deleted the messages same :/

ray: “you wanna see my axe storing room?” your WHAT room

henry: “do i even have to axe?” eyyyyyyy ;)

ray and henry are the best of friends! :D

they’re playing a just dance ripoff how sweet :)

henry: “this has been so much fun!” ray: “I LOVE YOU TOO!” henry: “what?” ray: “I SAID GET READY FOR ROUND TWO!”

the game is calling for a tango STOP THE SHIPPING

and the game is called PRANCE PRANCE REVOLUTION lol :D

ray wants the kids to leave to spend more time with henry ♥

DAAAANG HENRY JUST LIFTED RAY YOOO!!!!!

ray: “quit your bellyaching!” henry: “yeah, this is what you get paid for!” the kids: “YOU GOT PAID???” lol :D

ray wants to stay up there ‘as long as he can’ wowza what a shippy shippy

the intro pops up nearly 6 minutes into the ep what a long and exciting cold open! :D

chapa to mika: “we got your heart to start beating again...” wtf happened :o

bose’s mouth was full did he have a towel in his mouth lol

mikes screaming “I HATE YOU!!” is better than anakin lol

CHAPA WANTS TO DESTROY HENRY WTF

mika isn’t up for this bs YOU GO MIKA!!!!!

mika: “AND CHAPA SHOULD BE THE ONE THAT KILLS HIM!!” FRICK YEAH!!!

...but also FRICK NO DON’T KILL CAPTAIN MAN PLZ

omg henry and ray started a totally sick rock band yo!

SCHWOZ BE LIKE ‘AWWW YEAHHHH!!!!” :D

henry: “don’t need to practice when you’re already perfect, dude!” hannah montana wants to know your location

why is ray obsessed with henry’s mom creepy

henry: “gotta save my messages to the cloud!” F U T U R E!!!!”

char’s messages are like ‘you can’t run from this’ HENRY WHAT’S GOIN’ ON HMMMM?????

ray: “...that didn’t sound like your mom.”

henry asked if he was ‘totally untrackable in the man’s nest’ WHAT DID YOU DO HENRY

ray: “finding you in here would be like trying to find a gray hair on my head!” henry: “there’s one right there.” ray: “whaaat?”

MIKA BE P-I-DOUBLE S-ED YO

henry’s been there for 3-4 days HENRYYYY!!!!

chapa: “we also think we should be able to vaporize someone FOR NO REASON AT ALL!!!!” daang chapa p-i-double wuble s-ed too!

ray: “time is a tall glass of water” henry: “please don’t punch my glass-” ray: *PUNCHES GLASS LIKE A BOSS*

ray: “next crime that calls is goin’ home in a body bag” sweet serenity celestia captain man calm down

henry: “who knows when the next call will come in?” call: *comes in* lol

OMG DID THE KIDS SET UP THE EMERGENCY CALL???? :o

HENRY TRANSFORMED YAAAS!!! and i guess the dark outfit he wore in the insta teaser pic is his new hero form?? :o

henry: “up the tube!” captain man: “...we go down the tube.” lol :D

and awayyyyy they go!

robber: “part of the reason i rob people is for the connection i feel and i feel like you’re (the cashier) not here with me right now!” awww ♥

the cashier walked past captain man’s book first of all awesome call back and secondly why is a book being sold at a convenience store

captain man: “let’s slow fight this crime”

robber: “is this your sidekick?” ray: “naw, we’re just vibing!” henry: “you don’t even know what that means” ray: “it’s means, like, we’re together but not really” johnlock wants to know your location

henry really wants to get back to the man’s nest what’s goin’ on here????

a drone just said ‘henry hart located sending bounty hunter’ first of all wtf and secondly BOBA FETT CROSSOVER WHAT

even captain man’s like ‘wtf dude?’

mika: “i finally got mom and dad to fall asleep! you know what that means...” others: “SCREEN TIME!!! :D” kids these days...

chapa; “i wish i had a phone!” the way she said it is a total ‘god i wish that were me’ meme

the ad on is for ‘imdb tv’ THEY HAVE A STREAMING SERVICE??????

mika has a big phone or a tiny tablet

mika to a caller: “WHAT DO YOU WANT????” miles: “YOU’RE INTERRUPTIN’ SCREEN TIME!!!” sweet serenity you two CALM THE FRICK DOWN

captain man: “the kid and i are in a bit of a jimmy jam...” jimmy john’s wants your location

henry: “you want to fly the mancopter? get a bunch of puppies?” you’d think the kids would want to fly the flipping mancopter but they want puppies instead. kids these days! :D

captain man: “what’s gotten your brisket in a basket?” lol

henry: “dystopia’s really scary-“ well duh you live in a town called DYSTOPIA what did you expect

henry messed with a guy WHO EATS PEOPLE’S SOULS WTF

captain man reaction: “...so you didn’t come to swellview to see me?” i think you should be focused on the, i don’t know... EATING PEOPLE’S SOULS PART RAY

the lights just went out OH MAN

OH CRAP THE BLACKOUT IS HERE WITH A GUN

henry: “we’re gonna die, dude!” captain man: “hold on gotta try and think of an opening quip-“ this is like yakko saying ‘we need a perfect opening’ line in the animaniacs reboot lol :D

also THIS DUDE IS LITERALLY GONNA KILL YOU RAY YOU SHOULD BE SCARED FOR YOUR LIFE

captain man: “knock knock-“ the blackout guy: *shoots captain man into a wall* captain man: “typically you’d say ‘who’s there?’“ lol

YO THE GUY JUST GOT TRAPPED IN A SPIDER WEB

shoutout: “how did you miss the floor awol?” awol: “at least we’re here! we could’ve been in another country!” oh miles! :D

chapa: “why are the lights out?” henry: “it’s blackout! he’s a bounty hunter from dystopia-“ chapa: “aaalllllready stopped listening.” why does nobody care about a soul-sucking bounty hunter tho??

captain man has a wall on his back like peter being stuck to the couch in that one family guy ep lol

the lights go on and everyone cheers! :D

captain man: “i said i wasn’t done with my quip! knock knock-“ *gets thrown to the ground* he’s never gonna get to that quip huh

henry: “looks like captain man is taking care of him.” no i think HE’S BEING ATTACKED HENRY

henry: “tell schwoz he can keep my dirty laundry-” why didn’t he pick it up before he moved tho

awol: “captain man says you’re the best superhero he’s ever seen!” henry: “that doesn’t sound like him.” brainstorm: “he also says you have a surprisingly good singing voice.” henry: “i guess i’m alriiight...;)” lol

volt: “captain man says that we’re garbage and we’ll never measure up to you” geez ray be a bit nicer to them (especially chapa) not everyone’s your bf henry

awol: “let’s take this guy down together! ... that sounded really cheesy” lol i love how they all agree except for shoutout :D

the blackout guy wants to know why captain man’s not dying DOES RAY NOT HAVE A SOUL????

YO VOLT JUST HIT BLACKOUT’S FACE WITH LIGHTNING that’s gotta hurt!

blackout falling down because of a scream is the best :D

yay they did it!!! :D

AND BRAINSTORM HIGH-FIVED HENRY YAS! :D

captain man: “what do you get when you cross a duck with a shutzu?” nice dodging the nickelodeon censors ray ;)

barrow raffle ad: “you could win a million dollars! if you ask us, that’s a win-win” a win-win is letting me finish this ep

captain man kicked blackout and he didn’t respond IS HE DEAD??? :o

schwoz left an alive present in henry’s jeans WTF SCHWOZ

henry: “tough group of kids you got there.” ray: “yep, it always surprises me how much grit and determination each one of them has- oh my god, they’re baby-talking the puppies” lol what a perfectly delivered line :D

henry: “buh-bye dangers!” awww dangers!!! :’)

the higher-pitch of the vid makes mika’s puppy voice SO ADORBS! ♥

♥♥♥♥♥♥

*phone alarm* henry: “that’s my guber!” i know it’s an uber pun but henry’s getting a goofy goober ride awwww yeah! B)

ray doesn’t want to let go awww :)

yo schwoz put a turtle in henry’s pocket lol :D

ooh there’s a post credit scene! :D

and it’s bloopers how sweet :)

that was a great ep as always (probably my fave ep along with the quarantine special)! him and captain man have awesome chemistry and henry with the kids is great too ♥ see ya soon henry! (and danger force)

#livewatch #it's nice to return to this show #and see henry's return of course ;)

2 notes · View notes

unsettlingshortstories · 3 years

Text

He'll Come Knocking at Your Door

Robert R. McCammon (1986)

In the Deep South, Halloween Day is usually shirtsleeve weather. But when the sun begins to sink, there’s a foretaste of winter in the air. Pools of shadow deepen and lengthen, and the Alabama hills are transformed into moody tapestries of orange and black.

When Dan Burgess got home from the cement plant in Barrimore Crossing, he found Karen and Jaime working over a tray of homemade candies in the shape of pumpkins. Jaime, three years old and as curious as a chipmunk, was in a hurry to try out the candy. “Those are for the trick-or-treaters, hon,” Karen explained patiently, for the third or fourth time. Both mother and daughter were blond, though Jaime had inherited Dan’s dark brown eyes. Karen’s eyes were as blue as an Alabama lake on a sunny day.

As Dan hugged his wife from behind and peered over her shoulder at the candies, he felt a sense of satisfaction that made life seem deliciously complete. He was a tall man, his face lean and rugged from a life of hard, outdoor labor. He had curly dark brown hair and a beard in need of trimming. “Looks pretty Halloweeny around here, folks!” he drawled, and lifted Jaime into his arms when she reached up for him.

“Punkins!” Jaime said gleefully.

“Hope we get some trick-or-treaters tonight,” Dan said. “Hard to tell if we will or not, this far from town.” Their home, a rented two- bedroom farmhouse set off the main highway on a couple of acres of rolling woodland, was part of a subdivision of Barrimore Crossing called Essex. The business district of Barrimore Crossing was four miles to the east, and the thirty-five or so inhabitants of the Essex community lived in houses similar to Dan’s, comfortable places surrounded by woods where deer, quail, possum, and fox were common sights. At night, Dan could sit on his front porch and see the distant porch lights of other Essex houses up in the hills. It was a quiet, peaceful place. And lucky too, Dan knew. All sorts of good things had happened to them since they’d moved here from Birmingham, after the steel mill shut down in February.

“Might have a few.” Karen began to make eyes in the pumpkins with little silver dots of candy. “Mrs. Crosley said they always have a group of kids from town. If we didn’t have treats for them, they’d probably egg our house!”

“Hallo'een!” Jaime pointed excitedly toward the pumpkins, wriggling to be set down.

“Oh, I almost forgot!” Karen licked a silver dot from her finger and walked across the kitchen to the cork bulletin board next to the telephone. She took off one of the pieces of paper stuck there by a blue plastic pin. “Mr. Hathaway called at four.” She gave him the note, and he set Jaime down. “He wants you to go over to his place for some kind of meeting.”

“Meeting?” Dan looked at the note. It said Roy Hathaway. His house, 6:30. Hathaway was the real-estate agent who’d rented them this house. He lived across the highway, up where the valley curved into the hills. “On Halloween? Did he say what for?”

“Nope. He did say it was important, though. He said you were expected, and it was something that couldn’t be explained over the phone.”

Dan grunted softly. He liked Roy Hathaway, who’d bent over backwards to find them this place. Dan glanced at his new Bulova wristwatch, which he’d won by being the thousandth person to buy a pickup truck from a dealership in Birmingham. It was almost five- thirty. Time enough for a shower and a ham sandwich, and then he’d go see what was so important. “Okay,” he said. “I’ll find out what he wants.”

“Somebody’ll be a clown by the time you get back,” Karen said, glancing slyly at Jaime.

“Me! Me’ll be a clown, Daddy!”

Dan grinned at her and, his heart full, went back to take his shower.

Darkness was falling fast as Dan drove his white pickup truck along the winding country road that led to Hathaway’s place. His headlights picked out a deer as it bolted in front of the truck. Beyond the ridge of hills to the west, the setting sun tinted the sky a vivid orange.

Meeting, Dan thought uneasily. What was it that couldn’t wait? He wondered if it might have something to do with the last rent check. No, no; his days of rubber checks and irate landlords were over. There was plenty of money in the bank. In August, Dan had received a letter that said they’d won five thousand dollars in a contest at the Food Giant store in Barrimore Crossing. Karen didn’t even recall filling out an entry slip. Dan had been able to pay off the new truck and buy Karen a color television she’d been wanting. He was making more money than ever before, since his promotion in April from gravel-shoveler to unit supervisor at the cement plant. So money wasn’t the problem. What was, then?

He loved the Essex community. It was fresh air and bird songs and a low-lying morning mist that clung like lace in the autumn trees. After the smog and harshness of Birmingham, after the trauma of losing his job and being on unemployment, Essex was a gentle, soul- soothing blessing.

Dan believed in luck. In hindsight, it was even good luck that he’d lost that job at the mill, because if he hadn’t he never would have found Essex. One day in May he’d walked into the hardware and sporting-goods store in Barrimore Crossing and admired a double-barreled Remington shotgun in a display case. The manager had come over, and they’d talked about guns and hunting for the better part of an hour. As Dan had started to leave, the manager unlocked that display case and said: Dan, I want you to try this baby out. Go ahead, take it! It’s a new model, and the Remington people want to know how folks like it. You take it home with you. Bring me back a wild turkey or two, and if you like that gun, tell other folks where they can buy one, hear?

It was amazing, Dan thought. He and Karen were living some kind of fantastic dream. The promotion at the plant had come right out of the blue. People respected him. Karen and Jaime were happier than he’d ever seen them. Just last month, a woman Karen had met at the Baptist church gave them a rich harvest of garden vegetables that would last them through the autumn. The only remotely bad thing that had happened since they’d moved to Essex, Dan recalled, was when he’d made a fool of himself in Roy Hathaway’s office. He’d sliced his finger on a sliver of plastic in the pen he was using to sign the lease and had bled all over the paper. It was a stupid thing to remember, he knew, but it had stuck in his mind because he’d hoped it wasn’t a bad omen. Now he knew nothing could be further from the truth.

He rounded a corner and saw Roy’s house ahead. The front- porch lights were on, and lights showed through most of the windows. The driveway was packed with cars, most of which Dan recognized as belonging to other Essex residents. What’s going on? he wondered. A community meeting? On Halloween?

He parked his truck next to Tom Paulsen’s new Cadillac and walked up the front-porch steps to the door. As he knocked, a long keening animal cry came from the woods behind Hathaway’s house. Bobcat, he thought. The woods are full of ‘em.

Laura Hathaway, an attractive gray-haired woman in her mid- fifties, answered the door with a cheerful, “Happy Halloween, Dan!”

“Hi! Happy Halloween.” He stepped into the house, and could smell the aromatic cherry pipe tobacco Roy favored. The Hathaways had some nice oil paintings on their walls, and all their furniture looked new. “What’s going on?”

“The men are down in the rumpus room,” she explained. “They’re having their little yearly get-together.” She started to lead him to another door that would take him downstairs. She limped a bit when she walked. Several years ago, Dan understood, a lawn mower had sliced off a few of the toes on her right foot.

“Looks like everybody in Essex is here, with all those cars outside.”

She smiled, her kindly face crinkling. “Everybody is here, now. Go on down and make yourself at home.”

He descended the stairs. He heard Roy’s husky voice down there: “… Jenny’s gold earrings, the ones with the little pearls. Carl, this year it’s one of Tiger’s new kittens—the one with the black markings on its legs, and that ax you got at the hardware store last week. Phil, he wants one of your piglets and the pickled okra Marcy put in the cupboard… ”

When Dan reached the bottom of the stairs, Roy stopped talking. The rumpus room, carpeted in bright red because Roy was a Crimson Tide fan, was filled with men from the Essex community. Roy, a hefty man with white hair and friendly, deep-set blue eyes, was sitting in a chair in the midst of them, reading from some kind of list. The others sat around him, listening intently. Roy looked up at Dan, as did the other men, and puffed thoughtfully on his pipe. “Howdy, Dan. Grab yourself a cup of coffee and sit a spell.”

“I got your message. What kind of meeting is this?” He glanced around, saw faces he knew: Steve Mallory, Phil Kane, Carl Lansing, Andy McCutcheon, and more. A pot of coffee, cups, and a platter of sandwiches were placed on a table on one side of the room.

“Be with you in a minute,” Roy said. While Dan, puzzled at what was so important on Halloween, poured himself a cup of coffee, he listened to Roy reading from the list he held. “Okay, where were we? Phil, that’s it for you, I reckon. Next is Tom. This year it’s that ship model you put together, a pair of Ann’s shoes—the gray ones she bought in Birmingham—and Tom Junior’s G.I. Joe doll. Andy, he wants…”

Huh? Dan thought as he sipped at the hot black coffee. He looked at Tom, who seemed to have released a breath he’d been holding for a long time. Tom’s model of Old Ironsides had taken him months to put together, Dan knew. Dan’s gaze snagged other eyes that quickly looked away. He noted that Mitch Brantley, whose wife had just had their first child in July, looked ill; Mitch’s face was the color of wet cotton. A haze of smoke hung in the air from Roy’s pipe and several other smokers’ cigarettes. Cups rattled against saucers. Dan looked at Aaron Greene, who stared back at him through strange, glassy eyes. Aaron’s wife, Dan had heard, had died of a heart attack last year about this time. Aaron had shown him pictures of her, a robust-looking brunette in her late thirties.

“… your golf clubs, your silver cufflinks, and Tweetybird,” Roy continued.

Andy McCutcheon laughed nervously. In his pallid, fleshy face his eyes were dark and troubled. “Roy, my little girl loves that canary. I mean… she’s real attached to it.”

Roy smiled. It was a tight, false smile, and something about it started a knot of tension growing in Dan’s stomach. “You can buy her another one, Andy,” he said. “Can’t you?”

“Sure, but she loves—”

“One canary’s just like another.” He drew at his pipe, and when he lifted a hand to hold the bowl, the overhead light glinted off the large diamond ring he wore.

“Excuse me, gents.” Dan stepped forward. “I sure would like for somebody to tell me what this is all about. My wife and little girl are getting ready for Halloween.”

“So are we,” Roy replied, and blew out a plume of smoke. “So are we.” He traced his finger down the list. Dan saw that the paper was mottled and dirty; it looked as if it had been used to wipe out the inside of a garbage can. The writing on it was scrawled and spiky. “Dan,” Roy said, and tapped the paper. “This year he wants two things from you. First is a set of fingernail clippings. Your own fingernails. The second is—”

“Hold on.” Dan tried to smile, but couldn’t find one. “I don’t get this. How about starting from the beginning.”

Roy stared at him for a long, silent moment. Dan felt other eyes on him, watching him carefully. On the opposite side of the room, Walter Ferguson suddenly began quietly sobbing. “Oh,” Roy said. “Sure. It’s your first Halloween in Essex, isn’t it?”

“Right. And?”

“Sit down, Dan.” Roy motioned toward an empty chair near him. “Come on, sit down and I’ll tell you.”

Dan didn’t like the feeling in this room; there was too much tension and fear in here. Walter’s sobbing was louder. “Tom,” Roy said, “take Walter out for a breath of air, won’t you?” Tom muttered an assent and helped the crying man out of his chair. When they had left the rumpus room, Roy struck a kitchen match to relight his pipe and looked calmly at Dan Burgess.

“So tell me,” Dan urged as he sat down. He did smile this time, but the smile would not stick.

“It’s Halloween,” Roy explained, as if speaking to a retarded child. “We’re going over the Halloween list.”

Dan laughed involuntarily. “Is this a joke, gents? What kind of Halloween list?”

Roy’s thick white brows came together as he gathered his thoughts. Dan realized the other man was wearing the same dark red sweater he’d worn the day Dan had signed that lease and cut his finger. “Call it… a trick-or-treat list, Dan. You know, we all like you. You’re a good man. We can’t think of a better neighbor to have in Essex.” He glanced around as some of the others nodded. “Essex is a very special place to live, Dan. You must know that by now.”

“Sure. It’s great. Karen and I love it here.”

“We all do. Some of us have lived here for a long time. We appreciate the good life we have here. And in Essex, Dan, Halloween is a very special night of the year.”

Dan frowned. “I’m not following you.”

Roy produced a gold pocket watch, popped it open to look at the time, then closed it again. When he lifted his gaze, his eyes seemed darker and more powerful than Dan had ever seen them. They made him shiver to his soul. “Do you believe in the Devil?” Roy asked.

Again Dan laughed. “What are we doing, telling spooky stories?” He looked around the room. No one else was laughing.

“When you came to Essex,” Roy said softly, “you were a loser. Down on your luck. No job. Your money was almost gone. Your credit rating was zero. You had an old car that was ready for the junkyard. Now I want you to think back on all the good things that have happened to you—all the things you might have taken as a run of good luck—since you’ve been part of our community. You’ve gotten everything you’ve wanted, haven’t you? Money’s come to you like never before. You got yourself a brand-new truck. A promotion at the plant. And there’ll be more good things to come in the years ahead—if you cooperate.”

“Cooperate?” He didn’t like the sound of that word. “Cooperate how?”

“With the list. Like we all do, every Halloween. Every October thirty-first I find a list just like this one under the welcome mat at the front door. Why I’ve been chosen to handle it, I don’t know. Maybe because I help bring new people in. These items on this list are to be left in front of your door on Halloween. In the morning, they’re gone. He comes during the night, Dan, and he takes them away with him.”

“This is a Halloween joke, isn’t it!” Dan grinned. “Jesus Christ, you gents had me going! That’s a hell of an act to put on just to scare the crap out of me!”

But Roy’s face remained impassive. Smoke seeped from a corner of his wrinkled mouth. “The list,” Roy continued evenly, “has to be collected and left out before midnight, Dan. If you don’t collect the items and leave them for him, he’ll come knocking at your door. And you don’t want that, Dan. You really don’t.”

A chunk of ice seemed to have jammed itself in Dan’s throat, while the rest of his body felt feverish. The Devil in Essex? Collecting things like golf clubs and cufflinks, ship models and pet canaries? “You’re crazy!” he managed to say. “If this isn’t a damned joke, you’ve dropped both your oars into the water!”

“It’s no joke, and he ain’t crazy,” Phil Kane said, sitting behind Roy. Phil was a large, humorless man who raised pigs on a farm about a mile away. “It’s just once a year. Just on Halloween. Hell, last year alone I won one of them magazine sweepstakes. It was fifteen thousand dollars at one whack! The year before that, an uncle I didn’t even know had died and left me a hundred acres of land in California. We get free stuff in the mail all the time. It’s just once a year we have to give him what he wants.”

“Laura and I go to art auctions in Birmingham,” Roy said. “We always get what we want for the lowest bid. And the paintings are always worth five or ten times what we pay. Last Halloween he asked for a lock of Laura’s hair and one of my old shirts with blood on it where I cut myself shaving. You remember that trip to Bermuda the real-estate company gave us last summer? I’ve been given a huge expense account, and no matter what I charge, nobody asks any questions. He gives us everything we want.”

Trick-or-treat! Dan thought crazily. He envisioned some hulking, monstrous form lugging off a set of golf clubs, one of Phil’s piglets, and Tom’s Old Ironsides. God, it was insane! Did these men really believe they were making sacrifices to a satanic trick-or-treater?

Roy lifted his eyebrows. “You didn’t return the shotgun, did you? Or the money. You didn’t refuse the promotion.”

“I earned that promotion!” Dan insisted, but his voice was strained and weak, and it shamed him.

“You signed the agreement in blood,” Roy said, and Dan remembered the drops of blood falling from his cut finger onto the white paper of the lease, right underneath his name. “Whether you knew it or not, you agreed to something that’s been going on in Essex for over a hundred years. You can have anything and everything you want, Dan, if you give him what he wants on one special night of the year.”

“My God,” Dan whispered. He felt dizzy and sick. If it was true... what had he stumbled into? “You said... he wants two things from me. The fingernail clippings and what else?”

Roy looked at the list and cleared his throat. “He wants the clippings, and… he wants the first joint of the little finger of your child’s left hand.”

Dan sat motionless. He stared straight ahead, and feared for an awful moment that he would start laughing and giggle himself all the way to an asylum.

“It’s really not much,” Roy said. “There won’t be a lot of blood, will there, Carl?”

Carl Lansing, who worked as a butcher at the Food Giant in Barrimore Crossing, raised his left hand to show Dan Burgess. “Not much pain if you do it quick, with a cleaver. One sharp blow’ll snap the bone. She won’t feel a whole lot of pain if you do it fast.”

Dan swallowed. Carl’s slicked-back black hair gleamed with Vitalis under the light. Dan had always wondered exactly how Carl had lost the thumb of his left hand.

“If you don’t put what he wants in front of your door,” Andy McCutcheon said, “he’ll come in after them. And then he’ll take more than he asked for in the first place, Dan. God help you if he has to knock at your door.”

Dan’s eyes felt like frozen stones in his rigid face; he stared across the room at Mitch Brantley, who appeared to be either about to faint or throw up. Dan thought of Mitch’s new son, and he did not want to think about what might be on the list beside either Mitch’s or Walter Ferguson’s name. He rose unsteadily from his chair. It was not that he believed the Devil was coming to his house tonight for a bizarre trick- or-treat that frightened him so deeply; it was that he knew they believed, and he didn’t know how to deal with it.

“Dan,” Roy Hathaway said gently, “we’re all in this together. It’s not so bad. Really it isn’t. Usually all he wants are little things. Things that don’t matter very much.” Mitch made a soft, strangled groaning sound. Dan flinched, but Roy paid no attention. Dan had the sudden urge to leap at Roy and grab him by the front of that blood- red sweater and shake him until he split open. “Once in a while he… takes something of value,” Roy said, “but not very often. And he always gives us back so much more than he takes.”

“You’re crazy. All of you… are crazy.”

“Give him what he wants.” Steve Mallory spoke in the strong bass voice that was so distinctive in the Baptist church choir on Sunday mornings. “Do it, Dan. Don’t make him knock at your door.”

“Do it,” Roy told him. “For your own sake, and for your family’s.”

Dan backed away from them. Then he turned and ran up the stairs, ran out of the house as Laura Hathaway was coming out of the kitchen with a big bowl of pretzels, ran down the front steps and across the lawn to his pickup. Near Steve Mallory’s new silver Chevy, Walter and Tom were standing together. Dan heard Walter sob, “… not her ear, Tom! Dear God, not her whole ear!”

Dan got into his truck and left twin streaks of rubber on the pavement as he drove away.

Dead leaves whirled through the turbulent, chilly air as Dan pulled up into his driveway, got out and ran up the front-porch steps. Karen had taped a cardboard skeleton to the door. His heart was pounding, and he’d decided to take no chances; if this was an elaborate joke, they could laugh their asses off at him, but he was getting Karen and Jaime out of here.

Halfway home, a thought had occurred to him that had almost made him pull off the road to puke: if the list had demanded a lock of Jaime’s hair, would he have given it without question? How about her fingernail clippings? A whole fingernail? An earlobe? And if he had given any of those things, what would be on the trick-or-treat list next year and the year after that?

Not much blood, if you do it quick.

“Karen!” he shouted as he unlocked the door and went in. The house was too quiet. “Karen!”

“Lord, Dan! What are you yelling about?” She came into the front room from the hallway, followed by Jaime in clown makeup, an oversize red blouse, patched little blue jeans, and sneakers covered with round yellow happy-face stickers. Dan knew he must look like walking death, because Karen stopped as if she’d run into a wall when she saw him. “What’s happened?” she asked fearfully.

“Listen to me. Don’t ask any questions.” He wiped the sheen of sweat off his forehead with a trembling hand. Jaime’s soft brown eyes reflected the terror he’d brought into the house with him. “We’re leaving right now. We’re going to drive to Birmingham and check into a motel.”

“It’s Halloween!” Karen said. “We might have some trick-or-treaters!”

“Please… don’t argue with me! We’ve got to get out of here right now!” Dan jerked his gaze away from his child’s left hand; he’d been looking at the little finger and thinking terrible thoughts. “Right now,” he repeated.

Jaime was stunned, about to cry. On a table beside her was a plate with the Halloween candies on it—grinning pumpkins with silver eyes and licorice mouths. “We have to go,” Dan said hoarsely. “I can’t tell you why, but we have to.” Before Karen could say anything else, Dan told her to gather whatever she wanted— toothpaste, a jacket, underwear—while he went out and started the truck. But hurry! he urged her. For God’s sake, hurry!

Outside, dead leaves snapped at his cheeks and sailed past his head. He slid behind the pickup’s wheel, put the key into the ignition, and turned it.

The engine made one long groaning noise, rattled, and died.

Christ! Dan thought, close to panic. He’d never had any problem with the truck before! He pumped the accelerator and tried again. The engine was stone-cold dead, and all the warning lights—brake fluid, engine oil, battery, even gasoline—flashed red on the instrument panel.

Of course, he realized. Of course. He had paid off the truck with the money he’d won. The truck had been given to him while he was a resident of Essex—and now whatever was coming to their house tonight didn’t want him driving that truck away from Essex.

They could run for it. Run along the road. But what if they ran into the Halloween visitor, there in the lonely darkness? What if it came up behind them on the road, demanding its trick-or-treat like a particularly nasty child?

He tried the truck again. Dead.

Inside the house, Dan slammed the door and locked it. He went to the kitchen door and locked that too, his wife and daughter watching him as if he’d lost his mind. Dan shouted, “Karen, check all the windows! Make sure they’re shut tight! Hurry, damn it!” He went to the closet and took out his shotgun, got a box of shells off the shelf; he opened the box, put it on the table next to the pumpkin candies, broke open the gun’s breech, and stuffed two shells into the chambers. Then he closed the breech and looked up as Karen and Jaime returned, clinging to each other.

“All… the windows are shut,” Karen whispered, her scared blue eyes flickering back and forth from Dan’s face to the shotgun. “Dan, what’s wrong with you?”

“Something’s coming to our door tonight,” he replied. “Something terrible. We’re going to have to hold it off. I don’t know if we can, but we have to try. Do you understand what I’m saying?”

“It’s… Halloween,” she said, and he saw she thought he was totally cracked.

The telephone! he thought suddenly, and ran for it. He picked up the receiver and dialed for the operator in Barrimore Crossing to call for a police car. Officer, the Devil’s on his way to our house tonight and we don’t have his favorite kind of candy.

But on the other end of the line was a piercing crackle of static that sounded like a peal of eerie laughter. Through the static Dan heard things that made him believe he’d truly hurtled over the edge: the crazy theme music from a Porky Pig cartoon, a crash of cymbals, the military drumming of a marching band, assorted gurgles and gasps and moans as if he’d been plugged into a graveyard party line. Dan dropped the receiver, and it dangled from its cord like a lynched corpse. Have to think, he told himself. Figure things out. Hold the bastard off. Got to hold him off. He looked at the fireplace and felt a new hammerblow of horror. “Dear God!” he shouted. “We’ve got to block up the chimney!”

Dan got on his knees, reached up the chimney, and closed the flue. There were already pine logs, kindling, and newspapers in the fireplace, ready for the first cold night of the year. He went into the kitchen, got a box of Red Top matches, and put them into the breast pocket of his shirt; when he came back into the room, Jaime was crying and Karen was holding her tightly, whispering, “Shhh, darling. Shhhh.” She watched her husband like one would watch a dog with foam on its mouth.

Dan pulled a chair about ten feet from the front door and sat down with the shotgun across his knees. His eyes were sunken into his head and ringed with purple. He looked at his new Bulova watch; somehow, the crystal had shattered. The hands had snapped off.

“Dan,” Karen said—and then she too started to cry.

“I love you, honey,” he told her. “You know I love both of you, don’t you? I swear I do. I won’t let him in. I won’t give him what he wants. Because if I do that, what will he take next year? I love you both, and I want you to remember that.”

“Oh, God… Dan…”

“They think I’m going to do it and leave it outside the door for him,” Dan said. His hands were gripped tightly around the shotgun, his knuckles white. “They think I could take a cleaver and—”

The lights flickered, and Karen screamed. Jaime’s wail joined hers.

Dan felt his face contorting with fear. The lights flickered, flickered—and went out.

“He’s coming,” Dan rasped. “He’s coming soon.” He stood up, walked to the fireplace, bent down, and struck a match. It took four matches to get the fire going right; its orange light turned the room into a Halloween chamber of horrors, and smoke repelled from the blocked flue swept around the walls like searching spirits. Karen was pressed against the wall, and Jaime’s clown makeup was streaming down her cheeks.

Dan returned to the chair, his eyes stinging with smoke, and watched the door.

He didn’t know how much longer it was when he sensed something on the front porch. Smoke was filling the house, but the room had suddenly become bone-achingly cold. He thought he heard something scratching out there on the porch, searching around the door for the items that weren’t there.

He’ll come knocking at your door. And you don’t want that. You really don’t.

“Dan—”

“Shhhh,” he warned her. “Listen! He’s out there.” “Him? Who? I don’t hear—”

There was a knock at the door like a sledgehammer striking the wood. Dan saw the door tremble through the smoke-haze. The knock was followed by a second, with more force. Then a third that made the door bend inward like cardboard.

“Go away!” Dan shouted. “There’s nothing for you here!” Silence.

It’s all a trick! he thought. Roy and Tom and Carl and Steve and all the rest are out there in the dark, laughing fit to bust a gut!

But the room was getting viciously cold. Dan shivered, saw his breath float away past his face.

Something scraped on the roof above their heads, like claws seeking a weak chink in the shingles.

“GO AWAY!” Dan’s voice cracked. “GO AWAY, YOU BASTARD!”

The scraping stopped. After a long moment of silence, something smashed against the roof like an anvil being dropped. The entire house groaned. Jaime screamed, and Karen shouted, “What is it, Dan, what is it out there?”

Immediately following was a chorus of laughter from beyond the front door. Someone said, “Okay, I guess that’s enough!” A different voice called, “Hey, Dan! You can open up now! Just kiddin'!” A third voice said, “Trick-or-treat, Danny boy!”

He recognized Carl Lansing’s voice. There was more laughter, more whooping cries of “Trick-or-treat!”

My God! Dan rose to his feet. It’s a joke. A brutal, ridiculous joke!

“Open the door!” Carl called. “We can’t wait to see your face!”

Dan almost cried, but there was rage building in him and he thought he might just aim the shotgun at them and threaten to shoot their balls off. Were they all crazy? How had they managed the phone and the lights? Was this some kind of insane initiation to Essex? He went to the door on shaky legs, unlocked it— Behind him, Karen said suddenly, “Dan, don’t!”

—and opened the door.

Carl Lansing stood on the porch. His black hair was slicked back, his eyes as bright as new pennies. He looked like the cat that had swallowed the canary.

“You damned fools!” Dan raged. “Do you know what kind of scare you people put into me and my family? I ought to shoot your damned—”

And then he stopped, because he realized Carl was standing alone on the porch.

Carl grinned. His teeth were black. “Trick-or-treat,” he whispered, and raised the ax that he’d been holding behind his back.

With a cry of terror, Dan stumbled backward and lifted the shotgun. The thing that had assumed Carl’s shape oozed across the threshold; orange firelight glinted off the upraised ax blade.

Dan squeezed the shotgun’s trigger, but the gun didn’t go off. Neither barrel would fire. Jammed! he thought wildly, and broke open the breech to clear it.

There were no shells in the shotgun. Jammed into the chambers were Karen’s pumpkin candies.

“TRICK-OR-TREAT, DAN!” the thing wailed. “TRICK-OR-TREAT!”

Dan struck into the Carl-thing’s stomach with the butt of the shotgun. From its mouth sprayed a mess of yellow canary feathers, pieces of a kitten, and what might have been a piglet. Dan hit it again, and the entire body collapsed like an exploding gasbag. Then he grabbed Karen’s hand in a frantic blur of motion and was pulling her with him out the door. She held on to Jaime, and they ran down the porch steps and across the grass, along the driveway and the road and toward the main highway with the Halloween wind clutching around them.

Dan looked back, saw nothing but darkness. Jaime shrieked in tune with the wind. The distant lights of other Essex houses glinted in the hills like cold stars.

They reached the highway. Dan shouldered Jaime, and still they ran into the night, along the roadside where the high weeds caught at their ankles.

“Look!” Karen cried. “Somebody’s coming, Dan! Look!”

He did. Headlights were approaching. Dan stood in the middle of the road, frantically waving. The vehicle—a gray Volkswagen van—began to slow down. At the wheel was a woman in a witch costume, and two children dressed like ghosts peered out the window. People from Barrimore Crossing! Dan realized. Thank God! “Help us!” he begged. “Please! We’ve got to get out of here!”

“You in trouble?” the woman asked. “You have an accident or something?”

“Yes! An accident! Please, get us to the police station in Barrimore Crossing! I’ll pay you! Just please get us there!”

The woman paused. Then she said, “Okay. Climb in.” Dan pulled open the van's side door.

They started off, the engine backfiring, toward Barrimore Crossing.

“I don't see no accident,” the woman said. “You have a car wreck or what?”

Dan shook his head. The two ghost-children were watching him over the front seat. In his arms, Jaime was dazed and shaking. “We're okay,” he managed to say to Karen, and took her hand. “We're safe now, honey.”

And something wet dripped onto his cheek. He looked up at the van's ceiling.

The van had teeth.

Long rows of triangular, serrated teeth.

As his mind cracked and he began to laugh, he saw the sticky fluid dripping down off the teeth, saw in the green glow of the instrument panel more teeth pushing up from the van's soft, wet gray sides and floorboard.

His last coherent thought, as Karen's scream filled his head, was that the Devil sure could come up with one hell of a costume.

“Trick-or-treat, Dan,” the shape at the wheel said.

And the entire van smashed shut like a huge mouth, the teeth grinding down until bone and flesh were pulverized and unrecognizable.

Then the van, looking more like a large shiny roach, scuttled off the road toward the Essex woods. It changed shape into something that would drive a man mad to behold—and then it was gone into the hills, with its bellyful of Halloween treats.

1 note · View note

blankdblank · 4 years

Text

Dashing

…

“You’re not even cute”

“you’re right sweetie, I’m not cute. I’m drop-dead gorgeous.”

…

“You’re not even cute” The voice rang out clearly and an irritated cock of the antlered head of your best friend landed his wide eyes on the little woolen clad girl donning mittens a poofball topped hat and sloped shoes for this ridiculous suntan lotion commercial who had uttered it.

All he had done was tell her about the chord hidden under the fake snow she was crossing and after a sharp inhale puffing up his fake fur coated chest his hoof ended arms propped on one hip with the other wagging in her face, “You’re right sweetie, I’m not cute. I’m drop-dead gorgeous.”

A scoff from her came with his retort, “Why do you think they chose me for the role of Dashing?”

The little girl crossed her arms and fired back, “It’s Dasher, Dufus!”

To which you replied adjusting the top of your bikini top tethered to the bikini bottoms coated in ridiculous frills to compliment your swan floaty waiting in your ‘ocean’ of a kiddie pool in the beach half of the set. “No, it’s Dashing. Dasher cost three times as much.” With an amused scrunch of your nose back at the girl sticking her tongue out at you Thranduil chuckled and turned making you all but laugh at the white tail propped up just in the rim of his fur suit coated ass. Carefully he offered a hoof to help keep you steady in your climb into the ‘ocean’ and onto your floaty for the first take.

Santa from the side smirked at your giggle at the wink sending Thranduil’s fake lashes fluttering in the lifting of your arms in your recline back. Thranduil found his place back in the snow by the sleigh and other reindeer as Santa took his place atop the sleigh on the beach half readying for his move to drop coat for the cheesy sunglass inducing pasty skin reveal. That was when the slogan would play and he would be swapped out for his twin, complete with spray tan. The full ordeal ending with the final few lines in his ‘return’ to the North Pole and toss of a present your way as the reindeer around the sleigh would be splayed out in awkward poses trying to be cool as the bundled up children cheered.

For two hours of prepping the team of reindeers and children with their costumes and makeup the filming took barely twenty minutes and you were off to scrub, change and head off. Off to the side you watched Thranduil in his being eased out of the facemask and full body suit leaving just his makeup to remove. Lowly he hummed catching you in his mirror with a worried expression, “Just two more of these and our trip will be paid for.”

Heavily you sighed saying, “At least you get to hide behind a face mask. No doubt everyone at school will be talking about this.”

“Maybe next time you will get the mask.”

Lowly you huffed hugging your legs in front of you wrapped in his jacket at your usual bout of chills when you needed to eat soon making him mentally reel as to where he wanted to take you after this. “It’s only cuz I’m short. I would make an adorable reindeer.”

Widely he smirked through the stifled chuckle of the woman removing his fake eyelashes and heavy eye makeup, “Yes you would. Who knows, maybe for the sunglass ad they might need something like a chipmunk or-,”

He chuckled at your foot nudging the back of his seat, “Or an adorably spunky tiny reindeer who could kick Dashing’s butt.”

Laughing out loud he beamed brightly saying, “One can only hope they chose that alley for hocking their sunglasses.”

Sure enough at school by the end of the week the add had been blasted online and had been shoved in your face each chance anyone passing by got, a wave of unwarranted torment that Thranduil took personally and took it upon himself to shift to a more tolerable target. Your separate second classes gave him the opportunity, using his connections and calling in for a few favors he got a stack of print outs of his place in the reindeer group and signed each and every one of them. As soon as the bell rang all the way to your shared class he passed them out bragging about his role and approached each guy trying to give you a hard time, all of whom took the willing target to pick on. Shrugging it all off Thranduil simply boasted about the role, “You’re just jealous, two more adds and our Middle Earth summer travel fund will be doubled what we’d planned.”

Backwards he strolled shooting finger guns to his seat beside yours then dropped into his seat smiling at you widely showing you the image he’d chosen making you giggle as he said, “You know what’s more embarrassing than being in a bikini in a suntan lotion add? Being a reindeer in one.” Firing a wink your way in your calming grin looking forward as the teacher called the class to quiet down.

All the way to lunch he continued to pass out the pictures and boast about the role even bringing more students to ask what your next roles were until you had your meals set on the table you had chosen. Lists of all the places you were going to visit were looked over in your near blush inducing journey journal complete with scrapbook styled cutouts, notes and doodles around each stop. One especially made you stop each time, a bridge for lovers to usually stop at he had left to near the end of your trip.

“We should take off Vana’s Bridge.”

Scoffing at you he said, “We can’t go through Orome’s Square and not visit the infamous Vana’s Bridge!”

“You do realize it’s for couples! We can’t take a picture there! People would assume-,”

Scoffing at you he swatted your hand away from trying to mark out the stop, “People can assume all they like, but we are going!” Your lips parted only to shut at his saying, “By the time we get there we will be a couple!”

Playfully your brow inched up, “Oh really? You think that?”

Smirking back at you he replied, “Oh I know that! I’m going to be your boyfriend by then!”

“Is that so?”

He nodded, “It is so! And better yet we’re going to have a picture of us kissing there.”

“You wanna bet?” Your smirk was answered by his and silently the bargain was struck, one that was broken by that very afternoon when the usual sendoff in your dropping him off at home after school a kiss was stolen, though for a good month and a half who the thief was turned into a source of argument.

All –

@himoverflowers, @theincaprincess, @aspiringtranslator, @sweeticedtea, @ggbbhehe4455, @thegreyberet, @patanghill17, @jesgisborne, @curvestrology, @alishlieb, @jogregor, @armitageadoration, @fizzyxcustard, @here2have-fun, @lilith15000, @marvels-ghost, @catthefearless, @imjusthereforthereads, @c-s-stars

Hobbit/LotR – @abiwim, @jotink78, @pastelhexmaniac

X Thranduil - @evyiione, @sweetlytenacious25, @tigereyesf, @pastelhexmaniac

#Theincaprincesswritingchallenge #30daywritingchallengebytheincaprincess #Thranduil x Reader OC #Hobbit #lotr

14 notes · View notes

teffyjeffy · 5 years

Text

(Most of) JoJo’s Bizzare Adventure: Stardust Crusaders but almost everybody are kids having fun at recess.

Want a random JoJo post out of nowhere? No? Okay well here you go anyway!

A lot of the time when I was watching JJBA I felt like I was watching a very dramatic retelling of what was actually two kids playfighting.

“My guy punches super fast!” “Oh yeah? Well my guy can stop Time!” “Oh yeah?! Well, mine can too! I just discovered it!” “WELL MINE CAN DROP A ROADROLLER ON YOU” “THATS CHEATING”

Anyway, the idea started to snowball, so please enjoy my masterpost of (most of) JJBA Part 3 where the Stardust Crusaders are a group of 9 year old rascals who met up one day during recess. This is just for fun ^_^ also these are all copied and pasted from discord so the structure is a little jumbled. Enjoy!

Oh, and Spoilers are ahead.

“I can punch super fast!”

“Well I can use cameras and TVs as crystal balls, but I need to break them!”

“Mine can shoot flames, ooo ooo and-and I can control them at will!”

“Mine has a sword that can stab anything”

“MINE HAS AN ATTACK THAT IS UNBLOCKABLE AND ITS AREA EFFECT IS THE WHOLE PLAYGROUND-“

“No Kakyoin that’s not how we play. Youre not allowed to have an invincible attack”

Kakyoin’s introduction:

“I have an invincible attack”

“That’s not how it works Kakyoin but you’re cool, so you can keep playing with us”

The insect stand “Tower of Gray” was when the group was bothered by a fly on the school bus and they got a little too rowdy in their attempts to kill it, which pissed off the elderly bus driver. Thus the kids agreed that he was responsible for bringing the fly onto the bus in the first place. They got detention.

Jean Polnareff’s introduction:

“I have a sword that can pierce through anything!”

“Okay Jean, you can play with us, but you have to promise to stop pushing Avdol into the wood chips, he doesn’t like it.”

The stowaway girl is actually a 5 year old girl who wants to play with them and they hate it at first but they eventually warm up to her. The monkey with a ship stand was actually a retelling of the groups trip to the town’s public swimming pool. The boat was just an inflatable tube and the monkey was a chipmunk. And the original boat that blew up? That was the group’s original inflatable tube that got popped because the 5 year old wouldn’t stop gnawing at it

Later, the kids SOMEHOW convinced their parents to let them stay in the same hotel while the parents all hate business trips to go to. They “promised” not to pillow fight, then everyone except for Jean went to go get snacks while Jean went to explore the new room. Unbeknownst to them, the previous guests of the room accidentally left their daughter’s doll behind. Jean HATES dolls. He accidentally stumbled upon Child’s Play when he was surfing channels way too late at night without his parents knowing. Fear turns into aggression and someone from the hotel staff goes to check on him. He finds Jean and realizes it’s the same kid who shot him with a water gun earlier. Jean is kicked out and the parents have to pick their kids up. Jotaro and everyone else weren’t happy.

Rubber Soul is actually just that one bratty kid who thinks it’s sooooooooo funny to mimic other people while also making fun of the person they’re mimicking. It makes them feel “powerful.” Jotaro encounters Rubber Soul when the latter is mocking Kakyoin one day, while Jotaro is playing with the 5 year old; he then chases Rubber Soul all around the playground, and when he finally gets him, he busts his teeth in. They were only baby teeth though, they grew right back, which saved Jotaro from a brutal punishment. He was still forced to go without dessert for a month. He didn’t complain though because his mother was dealing with the flu at the time. He would give all his desserts to Kakyoin, which his how Jotaro discovered Kakyoin’s creepy habit of juggling maraschino cherries in his mouth.

J. Geil was somebody who used to play games with Jean’s sister. When she found out he sucked at party cake and teased him for having “Two left hands”, J pushes her into the mud and never plays with her again. Jean has held a grudge ever since.

Hol Horse is Geil’s “New friend” which pisses off Jean. Hol Horse, being a member of the wrong crowd, beats up Avdol and J. Geil just goes along with it. Jean is all “Avdol why are you even here, you had nothing to do with this!” And Kakyoin’s like “Should we call 911?” And Jean responds “Not yet, I need to beat up these guys first!” And Kakyoin calls 911 anyway.

The Mirror stand is just J. Geil going “Made you look” and punching your shoulder.

And Hol Horse’s stand is just a nerf gun. The reason it hurts is because he likes to get right up in your face before firing it. It’s ineffective if you’re too far away from him, because the dart bullet loses momentum and hits the ground harmlessly.

Jean eventually gets back at J. Geil by chasing him into the middle of a group of kids, then pointing up at nothing, shouting “Made you look,” and poking J. Geil in the eyes, which causes him to cry like a baby. And later, Jean is like “Oh yeah, I totally stabbed him with my sword!” when Jotaro asks him what happened.

Then Hol horse runs away because he realized J. Geil was a total loser.

The Empress stand was just Joseph’s retelling of his parents taking him to the doctor’s office so they could deal with a wart on his arm. He hated how boring the actual process was, so he pretended that he bested the wart in a game of wits and tore it asunder. Jotaro was grossed out.

(Btw in this AU Joseph is only a grade older than Jotaro, instead of being his grandpappy)

Wheel of Fortune is just the result of a very nasty game of tag with a brat who wouldn’t leave the group alone.

Enya is the crazy cat lady at the end of the street whose house the kids were forced to pass one day when they missed the school bus.

Steely Dan is the snobby “Cool Kid” of the playground, and a sore loser when the kids don’t play the way he wants them to. So Jotaro gives him a black eye.

The Sun is a kid who likes to fry ants with a magnifying glass. But Joseph likes bugs, and seeing this made him cry. So Jotaro, Kakyoin and Avdol plot to destroy the magnifying glass, which they thought was really funny. But at that point, the magnifying glass had to be returned to the science lab, so the kid was spared.

Or, in another interpretation:

“Hey guys, I wanna play! My guy’s power is that he’s literally the sun!!! ”

Joseph: “Wow, that’s pretty powerful-“

J,K,&A: “YOUR POWER IS STUPID, GET LOST”

Death Thirteen was the result of the kids being forced to deal with a baby who was throwing a tantrum while they all waited to get on the giant slide at the County Fair. Kakyoin was especially pissed.

I have nothing for the Judgement stand.

I don’t have anything for High Priestess either.

And Iggy is still a dog, but I’m getting rid of his tendency to fart because I just HATE IT

N’Doul isn’t blind, he wears glasses and can’t see shit without them. And he has a water pistol. And he hoards the playground’s sandbox.

Oingo and Boingo are a 6 year old and his 1 year old brother and they’re just the cutest little demon spawns.

Anubis is a dog that snatched Jean’s toy sword in its mouth, and the sword’s power to transfer souls was just Jean fearing that the dog had rabies. Jotaro rolled his eyes but convinced Joseph to help him buy a new toy sword to shut Jean up.

Mariah... I dunno man, I didn’t really care for her arc and it definitely doesn’t fit the “kids playground” scenario I’m going for.

ALESSI IS WRITTEN OUT COMPLETELY. HE IS NOT ALLOWED ON THE PLAYGROUND.

The D’Arby brothers are known for being the cheaters of the playground. So Jotaro scares the eldest brother in a game of Go Fish, and it messes D’Arby up so much that it triggers his Asthma and he he has an Asthma attack.

Pet Shop went down as the day when Iggy had a fight with a seagull and got pecked the ever loving SHIT out of. Jotaro tells the story at every Christmas party.

The younger D’Arby battle happened on a day when he and Jotaro were playing video games together. They accused each other of cheating, which resulted in Jotaro insulting him for liking dolls before pummeling him and consequently getting kicked out of the house. Joseph gave him a high five though, so it was worth it.

Vanilla Ice was the toddler who didn’t bother to move out of the way if you got in his path while he was driving his toy mini jeep. But if you asked Jean or Avdol, they’ll tell you that the toddler deliberately puts people in his path to run them over. And the occasional dog.

And finally, DIO.

DIO was a kid who got transferred to Jotaro’s school after being expelled because the principal of DIO’s previous school couldn’t get him to leave two of the students alone, by the names of Johnathan and Erina. He was pen pals with Johnathan, but that was the only connection DIO bothered to maintain.

Jotaro thought DIO didn’t even deserve the title of “School Bully.” He thought DIO was just a weird freaking kid. Despite that, most of the kids were scared of him, Jotaro’s friends included.

DIO loved to utilize the classic “Time Out!” whenever he played with the kids, and if they didn’t abide to the time out, they got a knuckle sandwich.

Jotaro was the first kid in a long time to just say “Nope.”

That’s when he learned that DIO was a kid who liked to screech like a banshee when things didn’t go his way. As well as throw a whole bunch of pencils (seemingly from out of nowhere) at any person that he upset with.

The road roller in this AU is the closest thing to a lethal heavy weapon that you can get on the playground: a frickin BIKE.

And DIO is like “TIME OUT SO I CAN SLAM THIS BIKE ON YOU” And Jotaro goes “Nope, your time out is cancelled because you’re a freak and also you tried to bite Joseph which was just gross, anyway-“ and he punched DIO in the leg, pushed him to the ground, and kicked woodchips in his face.

They both got expelled.

A few years later, on his way to middle school, Jotaro bumps into a kid named Josuke...

<============ TO BE CONTINUED

BONUS JJBA BATTLE TENDENCY

The Pillar Men are a reflection of the infamous day when three highschool bullies showed up to the playground. One of them beat a kid named Ceasar in a Rock Paper Scissors match; in responce, Joseph (who at the time was only 4) went apeshit. He kicked the first highschooler off of the carousel at the County Fair. Then he located the second highschooler, tied up his shoelaces, then lit them with a match. Finally, during the school’s annual science fair, he tracked down the third highschooler, who had just finished rigging a student’s baking soda volcano to blow up in his face. Joseph threw a bunch of rocks that he found outside at the highschooler, and then proceeded to lock him up in the school’s astral observatory. The first two highschoolers fled town after that, but rumor has it that the third one is still stuck in the abandoned observatory.

#jjba #jojo part 3 #stardust crusaders #au #jotaro #dio #kakyoin #avdol #joseph joestar #iggy

41 notes · View notes

boshaw-manor · 5 years

Text

‘This is gonna be so much fun!’

Rook’s attempts at joining Faith, Jacob and John up with her other guns for hire weren’t exactly going to plan. She’d tried a potluck but John ended up ruining it by insisting on cooking and giving everyone food poisioning. She’d organised a karaoke night that ended with Faith and Adelaide arguing over who got to sing Car Wash by Rose Royce. Hell, even the baseball game she put together ended up with Jacob throwing hissy fit because he lost by one point. It was getting impossible to get them to all get along but Rook was determined. This time, it’d work.

She’d decked out the attic in the Spread Eagle with beanbags and beers, telling them to arrive at 6pm on the dot for a very important meeting. Sure enough, they all arrived and gave her a quizzicle eye, standing in a semi-circle around the room.

‘So what’s goin’ on chica?’ Sharky asked, arms folded across his chest.

‘Yeah, I got stuff to do this evening.’ John groused, scratching at his beard.

‘No you don’t.’ Jacob stated loudly, John throwing him a glare. Rook crouched down and shut the trap door, locking it tight.

‘Woah woah woah, what is this?!’ Jess growled, her eyes darting around the room.

‘Games night. We’re going to play until all of you bond. I can’t trust you guys to have my back until you trust one another.’

‘I mean we could just take the key from you.’ Nick reached for it but Rook ducked, dipping a finger beneath the collar of her shirt and pulling it forward. She plunged her hand down and thrust the key into her bra before flashing her empty palms.

‘Nice try but no.’

‘That’s why she’s my best friend.’ Sharky grinned, elbowing Hurk who chuckled. There was a small silence as everyone looked at each other, unsure of where to start. Rook eyed them all, her gaze landing on Faith who straightened up.

‘I think,’ She began, smiling at Rook fondly. ‘This is gonna be so much fun!’

‘At least someone appreciates my hard work.’ Rook sighed. She walked over to the table and pulled out the Monopoly box, shaking it enthusiastically. ‘Pick your teams and let’s get going!’

Hurk and Sharky immediately linked arms, Jess and Grace doing the same. Adelaide made a bee-line for John who urgently took refuge behind Jacob.

‘What’sa matter sugar? I can show ya what it feels like to win.’ She batted her eyelashes and John’s blue eyes grew wide with either digust or genuine fear, maybe a bit of both.

‘You come with me Addie, we’ll be team wings.’ Nick took her shoulder and pulled her away from John who looked relieved.

‘Guess that puts us together Faith.’ Rook smiled, pulling the lid of the box off and unfolding the board.

‘We wanna be the puppy!’ Sharky screeched, flinging himself and grabbing the silver dog counter into his hand.

‘Oh hell yeah man! He’s so cute! What should be name him?’ Hurk cooed, petting the scrap of metal with a finger.

‘Uhhh... Barkzilla!’ Sharky grinned, fist bumping his cousin. Jacob rolled his eyes, hunkering down onto a blue beanbag and cracking open a beer.

‘We’ll take the car.’ Grace opened her palm begrudingly and Rook placed it in her hand.

‘What’cha thinkin’ Addie? The hat?’ Nick asked but she shook her head.

‘The cat more like.’ She grinned, eyeing John again. ‘Who doesn’t love a good pussy?’ The baptists’ cheeks flared up as he sat on the floor beside his brother and Jacob visibly choked on his beer. His cheeks puffed out like he was chipmunk as he struggled to swallow it down without snorting.

‘Boys?’ Rook asked and John leant forward peering at the leftovers.

‘Give us the thimble.’ He muttered but Jacob slammed his beer bottle down before she could hand it over.

‘The fucking thimble? Why?’

‘It’s the nearest one!’ John cried, still leaning over the board on his hands and knees.

‘Fuck that. I wanna be the boot.’

‘Fine, we’ll be the stupid boot okay?’ The youngest brother growled. Rook handed the silver shoe to him and John scurried backwards, slamming it into Jacob’s hand with a scowl. ‘Happy?’

‘Delighted.’ The solider grinned patronisingly, spinning it between his forefinger and thumb. Jostling the final counters, Rook showed them to Faith.

‘We’ve got the wheelbarrow, thimble, boat and the hat left. You decide.’ Rook knew Faith didn’t really care which counter they used. She’d be happy with any of them. But after spending most of her life being dictated to by Joseph, Pastor Jerome had suggested that Rook let Faith make more decisions for herself even if they were only small. It was all part of her recovery and reintegration into society.

‘I like the wheelbarrow.’ The siren smiled, picking it up and running a dainty finger over the handlebars. ‘It’s cute.’

‘Okie dokie.’ Rook divvied out everyone’s starting money as they all placed their counters on the board. At the first throw of the dice, all hell broke loose.

‘Hell yeah! Community chest baby!’ Sharky picked up one of the cards and squinted as he read. ‘Everybody has to give us fifty bucks.’

‘You’re shitting me? What the hell!’ Rook groaned, taking a fifty and handing it over.

***

‘This game is stupid.’ Jacob groused, arms folded in annoyance.

‘You’re only sulking because you keep getting us put in jail!’ John exclaimed, pointing at the lonely boot solemnly sitting behind bars.

‘S’okay, look we’re coming to visit!’ Nick exclaimed, as he counted up the amount of squares him and Addie needed to move.

‘You can always buy your way out.’ Rook pointed out, gesturing to their wad of cash organised by neatly by colour at John’s feet.

‘No ‘cause next time I’m gonna roll fuckin’ doubles.’ Jacob grunted indignantly.

‘You’ve said that for the past five turns.’ Reeling backwards, the youngest Seed feel onto his spine and splayed across the floor.

***

‘We wanna buy this one.’ Jess stated, about to hand Rook some of the fake paper money.

‘No no no! We wanna buy that one!’ Hurk shouted drunkenly, swaying a little even though he was sat down.

‘You’re not even on the panel!’ Grace protested only to receive a handful of blue plastic houses thrown in her face.

‘Are too! See!’ Hurk pointed at the silver car aggressively.

‘You’re the fucking dog you moron!’ Jess exclaimed, moving his elbow with her hand to point at the silve terrier that was a few paces behind.

‘Barkzilla!’ He screamed happily and Sharky whoozily cheered, though he didn’t know exactly what for.

***

Alcohol fuelled the game until nobody was truly certain who they were playing as anymore. Confusion settling across the group, Sharky got up and sauntered over to the cardboard box in the corner. He dipped his hands in a rooted around until he found something worthwhile.

‘Hungry Hungry Hippos!’ He screamed, waving the box in the air wildly.

‘I love rhinos!’ Hurk squealed and John crinkled his nose.

‘Hurk they’re hippos? That’s why it’s called Hungry Hungry Hippos.’ The baptist could not get over the stupidity of this man. Who confuses a hippo and a rhino?

‘I thought hippos and rhinos where the same thing?’ He bumbled, scratching at his head. Adelaide got up too and moved over to the box, peering inside.

‘Ha. Jenga.’ She laughed heartly, pulling it out.

‘I’m amazing at Jenga.’ Jess boasted, puffing her chest out. Grace pushed her, making the archer roll back.

‘Not as good as me.’

‘Oh you’re so on.’ Jess’ eyes narrowed as she stood up, swaying a little on the spot. She started to set up the game with Adelaide and Grace. Rook smirked at them and then noticed Faith watching longingly beside her.

‘Why don’t you join in?’ She said quietly, touching Faith’s arm in encouragement.

‘Oh no. They won’t want me to.’ She muttered quietly, picking at the fabric of her white jumper. Rook furrowed her brow, looking at Faith and then up to her friends who had nearly completed the tower.

‘Hey guys, can Faith join in?’ The Deputy asked. Grace and Jess exchanged an uncertain look so she shifted her attention to Adelaide, giving her a pleading smile.

‘Course. C’mon over.’ The helicopter pilot sympathised. Faith looked to Rook nervously who simply bobbed her head with a lop-sided smile.

‘O-okay. Thanks.’ Hopping to her feet gracefully, Faith tip-toed over to join in. Sharky came and took her place beside Rook.

‘Will you play this with me?’ He asked, shoving the box under her nose and pulling his best puppy dog eyes out of the bag. How could Rook say no?

‘Sure but it’s four players and Hurk looks busy.’ She stated, pointing at his cousin. Sharky turned and saw Hurk in a fervent arm wrestle with Nick over the table.

‘Damn.’ He grunted, staring at the hippos sadly. Rook turned her gaze to John and Jacob, both sitting on beanbags with beer bottles in their hands.

‘Yo Seeds, you playing?’ She called to them, blue eyes swivelling her way.

‘What your little kids game? Nah.’ Jacob sniffed, taking a swig of drink.

‘Oh yeah right, s’cause you’re scared.’ She shrugged, opening the box and setting up the game.

‘Psh.’ He grunted, leaning back into the beanbag. John crawled over, sitting behind the blue hippo and Jacob narrowed his eyes. ‘You fuckin’ kiddin’ me?’

‘Well there’s nothing better to do.’ His little brother retorted, pressing down on the lever and watching the plastic hippo snap forward.

‘Hell yeah Johnny boy!’ Sharky clapped him on the shoulder and sat cross legged behind the green hippo. Rook took the yellow one and shot a look at Jacob.

‘Ah look, you can be the orange one!’

‘I said I ain’t playin’.’ He sniffed but his eyes lingered on the board.

‘You sure? Or are you too chicken?’ She grinned, starting to cluck under her breath. Sharky joined in, bobbing his neck backwards and forwards. Even John started, making wings with his tattooed arms and batting them up and down.

‘For fuck’s sake, fine.’ Jacob slid off the beanbag and took his spot behind the orange hippo. Rook unleashed a handful of balls into the centre of the board and the four of them watched them roll until they settled against one another.

‘Ready, set, go!’ She hollered and the snapping began. Hands battered the levers as the hippos lurched forward and back, snatching balls into their mouths and depositing them in their individual racks. As the game ended, each player counted their balls and Jacob looked up with a smirk.

‘Nine.’ He grinned, already certain from counting the others’ marbles that he’d won.

‘Four.’ John frowned.

‘I got four too.’ Sharky stated.

‘Three.’ Rook sighed. ‘I demand a rematch.’

As the night wandered on, Rook’s friends started to go out for the count. Nick and Hurk were asleep over the table, hands still bound from arm wrestling. Grace, Jess, Adelaide and Faith lay snuggled around the fallen Jenga pieces. Yawning heavily, she slumped back into a sleeping Sharky’s chest. John’s head rested on her shoulder and Jacob’s boots were propped up on her knee. She’d done it. She’d finally united them.

#far cry 5 #jacob seed #john seed #sharky boshaw #fc5 #far cry #hurk drubman #adelaide drubman #jess black #grace armstrong #faith seed #prompt #fic #far cry fic #rook #mine

41 notes · View notes

relaxedreptile · 5 years

Text

Incredible

Pairing: Baekhyun X Reader

A/N: I have been working on this for over two months in between classes, during long car rides, any time I could spare. I apologize for my prolonged absence.

Please enjoy.

You sat in your car, hidden by the shadow the tall building you were parked next to was providing.

Cloaked in latex that stuck to every curve and edge of your body, you were on edge and ready to make a move the moment you heard of an opening on your radio.

You sat back in your seat, eyes locked on the pendant hanging from your rear-view mirror which had finally stopped its swinging after the car having been parked for so long.

You smiled, almost getting swept into a daydream before the speaker started spouting out words that sparked your interest.

“Route 17, we have a 417 in a residential area. No one seems to be injured at this time. Few officers are already on the scene but are in need of backup as-”

You put your car in gear, slipped your mask over your eyes, and slammed on the gas.

You had lived in this city long enough by now to know how to avoid any prying eyes, using back roads and conveniently broken streetlights to conceal your car that was going, to be honest, dangerously fast.

You didn’t see it as that big of a deal, the only damage that had resulted from you driving as recklessly as you did was that one time the sleeve of your suit got stuck in the gearshift and you had to rip it to get out of park.

Super suits are very expensive to repair.

Growing up the way that you did and with the abilities that you had, you came to the conclusion that you had one of two choices.

One, hide your powers from the world and live a boring life.

Or two, take advantage of your gifts and help as many people along the way.

You supposed that becoming a criminal and wreaking havoc on the world was also an option, but that didn’t really sound like your cup of tea.

With one last right turn and a slight jerk to the steering wheel, you arrived at your destination and successfully parked your car under a window that didn’t look too hard to break.

You adjusted your mask and put your black gloves on (you hated driving with them) before slipping out of the car and immediately pressing your back against the building you were next to.

You closed your eyes behind your mask and took a deep breath, relaxing your muscles as you felt your body start to shrink. The transformation forced you on all fours, making you groan when your gloves came in contact with the dirty pavement and grimacing internally when the noise of distress came out as no more than a mere squeak.

You scuttled across the ground, weaving around sharp rocks and holes in the sidewalk that you didn’t want to underestimate and fall into.

Staying close to the edge of the building, you followed the noise of police sirens, stopping only when you saw the entire “squad” that had shown up.

A 417, a person with a gun, and only two officers show up? This is why the world needed people like you.

You were planning your next few moves when the female officer’s walkie-talkie started spitting out words you couldn’t quite catch.

“There’s a man trapped inside with the gunman, late twenties. His neighbor is the one who called the police upon hearing yelling coming from the apartment, thinking it was just a disturbance or a domestic issue. The caller escaped the building before we arrived and is sitting in the back of my car.”

Your small ears perked up at the sound of yelling, someone was obviously in distress and was letting the whole neighborhood know.

Following the sound, your small feet scuttled across the ground before finding the source, a window that would probably lead you straight into the action.

You felt your body morph and change to a more practical shape, one with newly acquired wings. You were a bit rusty when it came to flying and you had never been able to master controlling your speed, but that didn’t stop you from putting this skill to work whenever you had the chance.

It took a couple seconds for you to lift off and you gave yourself a chance to hover a few inches off the ground to get used to the strain flying took on your truly-human body.

Your wings swept up to launch you upwards, before your eyes were easily overpowered by an oddly bright ray of sunlight. You floated back down to the ground, blinking repeatedly to try and regain your bearings.

Were your shrunken eyes just sensitive to light? Would you need to invest in a pair of sunglasses for birds? Would you need to invent sunglasses for birds?

You squinted your eyes with determination (and in fear of another flash) before launching yourself through the air to the nearest open window. You landed on a white windowsill and cursed when you noticed the open window had a screen preventing you from flying inside the building.

A tail grew out from the base of your back (the most painful transformation of all) and you felt every hair sprout out of your body until you were a chipmunk just begging to use its new teeth.

You were prepared for the next flash that came your way with your eyes closed and small claws wrapped in the screening so you didn’t fall like last time. Once you were able to chew through the wiring and were met with a big enough hole, you wasted no time in crawling through and landing with a small thud on the ground that felt like an earthquake to your tiny body.

Your feet glided across the carpeting as you sought for cover to give yourself time to get used to your new surroundings.

You found yourself in a bathroom. A man (who you guessed was the owner) was crouched in a ball on the toilet, holding a light brown cat that you knew you had to avoid before you were done for.

You shot across the room, squeezing under the closed (and probably locked) door just fly back against it when another flash of light struck your eyes, rendering your body practically useless.

The debilitation put your body in panic-mode as it started to grow back into its real form, a crumpled heap of human covered in latex.

Your masked face met another one with eyes cloaked in red.

“Is that...” you were in disbelief.

“Where the fuck did you come from?”

Your attention snapped to another man halfway across the room with a gun in his hand. Your lips twisted into a smirk before you seemingly disappeared into thin air.

You buzzed around the masked man’s ear, hoping he got the hint since you couldn’t speak to him until you went back into your human form. Once you saw the corner of his mouth flick upwards, you knew he had caught on and you flew towards the man with the gun, ignoring the flashes of light that you realized were now thanks to the man behind you.

With both his hearing and his sight compromised, the gunman had practically no further moves to make and eventually collapsed to the ground. The gun slid across the room, stopped by your fellow Super’s foot on the barrel.

“You were really cool in there, can you shift into all kinds of animals? Or just ones with wings.”

You cracked up at the man’s joke and crossed your arms, watching as the guy the two of you took down together was shoved into the back of a cop car, his eyes glued to his shoes.

“All kinds. Actually, I try to avoid wings as much as possible. Too much noise.”

He cocked his head, not buying your excuse.

“It’s hard okay! There’s a reason humans walk everywhere, no soreness in the legs can compare to what I feel in my back right now!”

He threw his head back, his laugh was deep and staccato and told butterflies to start fluttering in your stomach.

“So, Flashlight,” he grimaced at the nickname, “are we still on for tonight?”

“How many times have I told you to call me Baekhyun, Y/N?”

You placed a kiss on his cheek, ignoring how he feigned disgust.

“Too many for me to remember and I can’t wait to call you that for the rest of our lives.”

He shook his head despite the smile gracing his face, taking a few steps away before turning to look at you from over his shoulder when you yelled out to him.

“Just don’t forget our rings tonight, okay?”

“I’ll see you at the altar, Y/N.”

He disappeared in a flash of light.

#baekhyun #byun baekhyun #baekhyun fluff #baekhyun angst #baekhyun smut #exo #exo fluff #exo angst #exo smut #incredibles au

108 notes · View notes

tipsytaee · 5 years

Text

NCT 127 – “Neo City: The Origin” in San Jose (Fan Account - 190509)

Left work at 5:40pm, arrived in San Jose at 7:10, bought chicken nuggets from McDonald’s, and entered the concert hall at 7:50.

Hall feels kind of like a high school auditorium. Was expecting something a little more memorable.

I was kind of nervous and wondering if the $160 would be worth it, but I was excited about it too. Texted BFR and MKT a quick photo and both replied with excitement for me.

Concert begins.

(Cherry Bomb) Took me a little bit to get energized, but the smooth glide, backward fall, and leg split were everything.

NCT lightsticks are bright af. Every time the girl next to me waved hers to my side, I think I went just a little bit more blind lol.

(Chain) Taeyong’s absss. I was trying to fix something on my phone and, BAM! Front and center on the big screen. That shit came out of nowhere >.<

Didn’t have a lightstick this time, so I was just kinda awkwardly standing there. People around me must’ve thought I was the quietest kpop fan ever. But in my head I was hyped xD

(Ment #1) Taeyong really knows how to pump up a crowd—from his stretched out “Ohhh yeahhhh” that reclined into a sexy, throat-deep groan to his vocalized sports tournament siren after introducing his name. And his little fumble when trying to say “lifetime memories” was cute.

(Fly Away with Me) Ugh, this song put me in a mood. And Taeyong’s bouncing dance moves. He does them really nice.

(Back 2 U) Yuta’s vocals o.o And Taeyong’s soft swag throughout.

Not as many Taeyong stans as I thought, but definitely one behind me. I relate to her every time she screams for him when he does something remotely sexy and the crowd is quiet in obliviousness xD

(City 127) Slower song and Taeyong’s still not able to sit still. He was the only one who stood up and danced around for his part, and he continued to wiggle around in his chair after that xD :3

(Angel) So. Much. Skinship. Taeyong scooting his chair over to Jaehyun and being all squishy, touchy, and adorable with him. More with Yuta & Doyoung, and Jungwoo & Haechan. The line, “I’ll be your morning star” gave me all the feels. I eventually found myself swaying along.

(Jet Lag + more) Yuta’s slow, emotional hair flip and his unrelenting cuteness. If Taeyong doesn’t do it first, this kid might just kill me >.<

(Ment #2) Yuta being cute af and possibly throwing some random Japanese in there? xD

(No Longer) Definitely falling for Taeil’s voice.

So many Taeil, Haechan and Jaehyun stans.

(Regular) Taeyong’s sex faces live are killing me.

(Wake Up) The bars have come out. Hyped by Taeyong’s “Are you ready San Jose!” and subsequent ‘yeah’s and ‘whoo’s and arm pumping dance.

(Baby Don’t Like It) Taeyong literally coming in like a pimp on top of the bars. Sunglasses, posture, attitude, and all lmao.

(Mad City) The vibrations man, the fucking building was shaking.

(Good Thing) Taeyong’s outlandishly flamboyant paint-splatter suit, wtf xD Also his moonwalk is so fucking smooth. Yuta is adorably bouncy in his cute yellow sweater.

Seeing Taeyong’s sex faces in person is ridiculous (part 2).

…is Yuta my bias wrecker?

Chipmunk voices on the mic… (Started with Mark’s mic during Mad City and continued randomly throughout)

Changing lightstick colors with the music. Didn’t expect that to happen here. For some reason I thought it was only a Korea/Japan thing lol.

(Superhuman) The superior song. Always fall for that head snap in the beginning.

I was watching Taeyong for most of the concert, but I swear I saw Taemin’s face flash by for like half a second. I think the desperation to see Taemin live is getting too strong xD

(Ment #4) I fucking looked up and Taeyong had taken half of his sparkly jacket off during the ment. Guns fully loaded. Biceps at the ready. But my poor heart wasn’t >.< Haechan speaking Korean for the first time during the concert kind of made it more real that I was watching Korean idols who had traveled halfway across the world to perform in front of me. Taeyong and his backwards visor and casual black clothes is fucking hot. Taeil getting embarrassed when Johnny told him to growl and flex his muscles one more time, adorable :3 Taeyong did clapping push-ups, aegyo-ed, and fucking dabbed in the span of 20 seconds >.< Jaehyun asking if we’re ready to “get hot.” Boy, I’ve been steaming for an hour now (both literally and figuratively lol. Couldn’t find the time to take off my coat xD)

(Summer 127) The resonance and vibrations from the bass line had me shaking (in a good way). Taeyong’s front group seemed a little lost in the music when they finally went back into choreography—they kept looking at each other like “uh…” and wiggled their arms around aimlessly until it matched everyone else lol. Taeyong went HARD during this song. His panting had me thrown, and he rapped so hard his fucking vein popped out.

(Ment #5) Doyoung’s adorably cheesy fortune cookie story. Fortune cookie read, “You will touch the hearts of many.” Generic but absolutely true ^^ Taeyong’s pouty face before his ending speech. And he put his hands together, almost in prayer, when thanking his fans. It was so heartfelt and sweet.

(Pre-0 Mile) Taeyong’s switch from his soft voice when correcting the crowd’s move for “mine mine” to his deep, loud, crowd-pumping voice at the final “girl you’re just mine mine!” I love his duality. And the way he turned around to walk to the back of the stage for 0 Mile. Hot.

(0 Mile) Taeyong being a mom and picking up Doyoung after he fell to the ground trying to protect his abs xD He’s such a sweetheart <3

For the last three-ish songs, Taeyong was super energetic and hyped for the performances. It got me hyped too.

Their “San Jose is a real vibe-killer~~” xD

Someone threw a rose at Taeyong when they were walking from the left side audience to thank the right side, and he got adorably flustered. He fumbled with the rose a little bit, but he did manage to catch it.

Taeyong picked up the rose he had put down earlier to hold his members’ hands and bow. He was being such a tease with it, putting it sexily in his mouth, tango style, and turning around and pausing every two steps to pose with it. He also put on an adorable “San Jose” beauty pageant sash before posing with the rose and heading off stage. He was the last member to leave and he kept dorking around and teasing his fans, it was so freakin cute >.< (Side note: Found out later he was recently crowned “in charge” of their San Jose stop, which is why he had the sash.)

That ending^ was all I needed to make that whole concert worthwhile. I love you Taeyong <3

Concert ended at 10:40pm. Walked back to my car and drove home listening to nothing but NCT songs.

Post-concert thoughts: In the beginning, it felt like I was just watching another random concert. I was also hesitant about going even before that because I only really listened to about half the songs on the setlist. But I realized there’s something about concert settings that just makes everything sound amazing. The concert eventually evolved into something more meaningful and that I was super spazzy about and into (probably triggered by something Taeyong did lol), but it got so much more exciting after that and I loved it.

P.S. Taeyong’s shirt was sheer????

#concerts #nct 127 #fan account #text #my post #mine

9 notes · View notes