So says fate
(Hades & Persephone AU)
Content warnings: rape/noncon; nsfw; abusive parents
This time of the year cannot end tucked between sheets, laying down aching knees to snore the rest of the evening away. The crops have been bountiful so sleep is not supposedly easily had.
Rest is elusive for those who have toiled through the winter.
The time for toiling is over.
Spirits are high and— exhaustion be damned, the knees ache for merriment; for dancing; for, thereafter, running away from the festivities, a trail of giggles behind, hand in hand with a lover towards an empty barn; for a kiss; for a clumsy tumble in the hay. This is a time for drinking, of your name sung and savored by intoxicated lips.
But you have walked and walked and walked— made it past the forest that divided your world from his. It’s been hours.
The earth remained silent, as if in slumber, buried under unyielding snow.
Below, where the soil should've been rich and soft and the grass thick and dewy for the dawn, there were only blades that cut through the calluses and scabs on your feet. From east to west, across the prairie, the trees stood out like fingers charred into disfigurement. They did not sway, branches unbudged by the gale.
A mother's grief.
(A mother’s anger.)
"I'm home," you called out, panting. Each breath came out in smoke. "Can't you feel me?"
She would’ve come by now, perhaps not without a tirade about your obstinacy and immature and bumbling nature, but you could take that. You always had. You would take any mean thing she could dole out if it would mean she’d be here to see you.
Because when the last of her anger had left you know that she’d eventually hold your face between her work-torn hands, inspecting how gaunt it’d become from all that had happened to you. Her eyes would turn glassy, crow's feet drooping.
And because she’s not the unfeeling bitch they claim her to be, she’d shed those indignant tears as she asks, "Who did this?"
And reality will dawn on her, after lifting your tattered clothes, that the wounds don't end on your face.
And you’d lift your chin up, anyway.
They’re all on the skin. Merely that. They don’t go any deeper, not to the point of scratching bone. Besides, the wounds are proof of the days (months) (eons) spent trudging through valleys that had never felt a drop of rain. There is no need for shame. You’d tell her you braved steep mountains that could have sent you tumbling down a raging river at the slightest misstep; eluded the grasping hands of souls that hungered for a warm body and a beating heart.
You’re here now, you would say.
“I’m here now, mother,” you cried out.
The wind continued to howl.
You sought the pulse of every creature that once danced to the beat of your own.
No laughter. No dancing. No merriment.
Finally, like a child holding onto her mother’s skirt in search of any sign of forgiveness, you said, “I’m so sorry.”
Penitence was the only way to a god’s good graces, innocent or not. The gods had no use for a lesser being that did not know how to kneel. And the Lady Harvest was a god first and your mother second.
“Please forgive me,” you told her, meaning every word of it.
Breaking your resolute stomp, you fell on all fours and begged like you never had before: to feel that embrace that had been the only thing you ever knew before he took you away; to hear her voice; to be brought home. “I was stupid and careless and—”
Young.
The open cuts on your palms prickled against the snow. That did not deter you from bunching it into your hands, for nothing could ever burn more harshly than that simple truth. Your fingers curling into fists, you lowered yourself further— further than you’d already been debased, and pressed your forehead against the freezing ground.
It should have been spring by now. (Spring has long come and gone, you know this). You knew because you'd never stopped counting each agonizing day that passed, longing for the seasons that had come and gone. All the springs you’d missed.
You shut your eyes tight— cheek to cheek with hale that refused to melt, and wept.
“I’m so dirty now,” you finally admitted. “But I’m still your daughter, mama.”
“I am still your daughter.”
A proclamation this time, louder, with teeth bared through snivels.
“I am still your daughter,” you repeated.
And amidst the groveling came a stray thought:
This is your lot in life.
What did it matter that you’d suffered.
This is your lot in life.
The earth is hardened with ice and the strikes you descended upon it, although more forceful with every passing second, didn’t do anything to soften it. As it should’ve been. This is how it is and this is how it would always be. All that suffering, all the tears shed, all had been just that. Like the wounds. Merely that.
When you pleaded, splayed and bleeding on your marriage bed, for any form of salvation to bring you back home and the only answer you had was an empty sky staring back at you. Not a sun or moon or a cluster of stars to be seen, as if everything and everyone that you’d prayed to had decided to turn a blind eye to the very same pain they promised to shield you from.
Exactly like this.
No one answers your call. The silence is so palpable, you could taste it. Then, without a warning, it becomes oppressive with an invisible, unbearable weight, and your strength, whatever little of it is left, further dwindles into pathetic shivering.
Ah, you sighed, yielding to that force pulling you down (for what else is there left to do), such is your lot in life.
You managed a faint, bitter smile, briefly stretching your already cracked lips, as you slowly raised your head. You didn’t bother to turn around.
“Well,” you croaked, “that was fast.”
He didn’t respond. Didn’t move either. If he did, you wouldn't have heard it.
“You don’t suppose you can call my mother for me? Perhaps she’d taken a liking to you.”
Pulling at the bit of root that made it past the cold, you added, “Between the two of us you’re the only one who gets to come up here. You have visited her, surely? She bakes the loveliest pastries. Pity, though, for she will not have me. Can you believe it? I sure can’t."
You shake your head. "So unlike the humans in that regard. Apparently, absence does not make that great, incomparable heart grow fonder.”
“Even if it’s towards their own child,” you told him, tightening your enclosed hands. “My, of course, you already know that.”
There.
They never cared for your prayers, so they better not start with your sacrilegious jabs now. Besides, he wasn’t like his brothers who stuck their nose in every mortal business and punished the slightest whiff of profanity. This great, incomparable, and immovable creature— an enigma to both the impermanent and the eternal, will never be swayed by something so inconsequential as a deranged woman’s bitter taunts.
As if to prove your point, he then replied, “She won’t listen to you.”
You sneered. Ever the epitome of compassion, this one.
“Nor I, for that matter. She refuses to listen to anyone save for herself,” he concluded, that voice frigid and quiet. Just like this damned snow that seemed to go on for forever.
You find yourself bereft of any ammunition to retaliate with, like always. That little gibe about his filicidal father had been the last of it. But, you’d come this far.
You’re almost home.
She just needs to let you in.
“Call her,” you muttered, vision fixed on the blank horizon. “Call her, my Lord.”
He huffed, a hushed sound that exploded in the tranquility of the frost-bound meadow.
He’s irritated.
Good.
“The gods are always watching,” he only said.
A reminder that didn't need to be said twice. The only constant in this fickle universe. The gods are always watching. Your mother can see you— had seen every moment you’d been away from her. She was there the moment you set foot into the world of the living. She was there the night gold soaked the sheets and every other night that came after that.
She was there when those red lilies caught your fall, petals and filaments like the spindly legs of dead spiders against your neck.
Your mother heard your cries then and she didn’t do anything.
She won't do anything now.
Because you’re a bad daughter. Only good daughters deserve the hand of their mothers, don’t they?
You didn’t feel your skin jump anymore when he closed the distance between you two. It’s insidious. That you know his every breath simply by the way the air subtly shifts.
“Let’s go,” he whispered, opening his palm for you to take. “You’re freezing.”
The edge of his cloak teased your shoulders. If you leaned into him its warmth would’ve embraced you whole. You ignored him, eyes trained forward. Then, “What about you?”
The gods are always watching.
“Aren’t you a god, too?” you pushed. “Were you watching me, all this time?”
The gods are always watching.
"You'd been following me, my Lord?"
Such an inane question. How else were you able to pass through the river, the valley, the mountains, the woods? How else had you gone on your journey for so long, untouched by any spirit, malevolent or otherwise?
He knew when you snuck out, had been aware of it ever since the seed of rebellion had been planted in your mind. He was right there. Behind you. Following you.
Always.
Your mother will never see you again.
Your husband will never let you go.
What use, penitence? What use, defiance?
(They’re all fucking with you.)
For what? At this point, you no longer have anything left to give, not even contrition. Right then and there, your only true possession had been the snow trapped in your fists. He insists on taking from you, doesn't he? Well, this you are more than generous to relinquish.
You snapped towards him, crouched like a feral thing, and threw the ball of snow straight into his face. Your chest heaved as you stood.
“Leave!”
The shriek that left your throat had been dry, fragile, and strained, yet you still pushed that raw ache welling inside you because there was no other way to get rid of it.
“Leave! Leave! Leave!”
Hot tears began rushing down your face, mingling with the spittle and snot as you took in deep, shuddering breaths.
“This isn’t your land anymore! You don’t belong here!” you roared.
He barely flinched.
He just stood there, dusting off the bits of snow clinging to his shoulder. He remained just as he'd been, motionless even as your cries subsided.
Then, after decades of running and never daring to look back, once again, you found yourself standing face to face with death.
The enraged beating of your heart petered out, skipping weakly only to collapse by the end of it.
His cloak shrouded him until it swept past the ground. You could scarcely tell where the garment ended and where the darkness began.
He and it had always been one and the same.
Nevertheless, the Lord Death stood out against the shadows with those heartwood eyes, glowing like embers that the violent winter wind failed to snuff out.
Its icy gusts, meanwhile, threatened to topple you into the snow for every second that you spent fighting against the current, keeping your feet planted into the ground and stubbornly ignoring your body's desire to keel over.
The wailing swelled, heightening into a sharp ringing inside your ears. You winced and chewed the insides of your cheeks. By the damnable gods you were not going to cry anymore.
You'd already done enough of that.
Enough, now.
However, the once steady branches began to rattle like corpses jerked into convulsions, and, one by one, trees started falling in heavy thuds, shaking the frozen land and bringing your knees closer and closer to the cold, and it was only then that you realized that there's never been a bigger lie than you telling yourself that you'd no longer cry.
Enough, I say.
You could almost hear her.
Enough with your insipid tears, little girl.
Oh, but by the Lady Harvest, how could you not cry?
No matter how hard you tried to remain stoic just as he is, your jaw still quivered, as if some sick monster were struggling to crawl out of you, and your heart constricted until the periphery of your vision was too dim for sight.
The Lord Death's gaze was not unkind. Only patient, in the manner of the wiser mortals when they wait in silence for the ignorant ones to work out what they mean to say.
Soon enough, the gale stopped, and in its place came the gasping whimpers.
You placed a hand over your mouth.
It hadn't managed to stifle the staggered bawling that echoed across the endless winter, darkness surrounding you like an inescapable vacuum.
And there was just no way of stopping it.
You collapsed, body shattering on the snow, retching and keening as you clutched your stomach.
What did you tell him earlier?
Leave.
This isn't your land anymore.
You don't belong here.
Now, who truly doesn't belong here, stupid child?
The flowers and leaves and trees are not waiting for the sun, you know that already. There would be no celebration, no dancing, no silly little rendezvous between silly young lovers.
The earth is not silent.
The earth is dead.
There'd been nothing to grow and eat. The cold had been too much to bear.
Spring had not come.
You were not here.
Look at what you've done. Was all that disobedience worth this?
"No, no," you gasped, choking on your tears as you struggled to genuflect. "No, mama, I'll make it right it's all my fault- please listen- please forgive me-"
"Don't blame yourself," you heard him say, effortlessly wrapping you in his cloak while you cried and cried and clambered out of his hold. "It is futile."
"You don't understand, you don't understand," you wailed.
How you yearned to be here.
You'd imagined yourself crossing that border and laughing giddily as you speed towards the rolling hills, splashing the crystal clear waters of the stream with your feet, your mother watching, clicking her tongue, telling you to hurry or you won't have anything left for dinner.
It is futile.
There is nothing here for you now. Not your mother. Not your people. Nothing here would ever be capable of loving you in return.
And you would've laughed had you still possessed the energy for it. What a farce you'd made of yourself. It must take some sort of inherent gift to allow things to come to this.
Because, as it stands, the only place that you could come back to now is the very same one that you turned your back on.
“Oh, fuck off.”
The woman wiped the froth from the liquor on her mouth, and smudged the back of her hand with rouge.
“I’m afraid I can’t,” Kita told her.
“C’mon, read the room,” she groaned. “Not now!”
He has, indeed, surveyed the mead hall alive with food and sweetmeats and talk and music. The cause of her stubbornness to leave with Kita was difficult to miss. He was handsome, as well as tall, more so that he loudly inquired for the woman’s whereabouts as he weaved his way through the inebriated preparing themselves for a lively jig.
“I even charged him less than a whole night’s worth!” And because he stayed as impassive as he’d been, she added, too beseechingly as they often do, “Can’t a girl get a good tup before she goes?”
She didn’t want an answer, that was apparent. What she wanted was more time, and for this to not have happened, but no one gets a say on fate. Not even them.
Her body sat in the corner. Kita let the woman stare at it, at herself, face down on the table as if knocked to slumber by the drink beside her head, her hand that once clutched her chest now limp on her lap. “Fuckin’ idiot,” she chuckled, shaking her head.
“It shouldn’t be that bad, right?”
“That’s up to you,” he said.
“Will Her Ladyship of Bountiful Harvest follow my ass to hell?” she piped up, unfazed by the thought judging by that snicker. “Hated me, she did. Can’t stand the idea of a woman spreading her legs for food. If she’s so against it she shoulda stop playing favorites and pay attention to us sinners, eh?”
Kita tipped his head. “You’re quite irreverent.”
The woman only gave a mockery of a courtesy.
“And no, you’re not going to hell,” he continued. “The Lady Harvest is not here. She won’t be there, either.”
“Oh,” she said. “What about her daughter though? Is she here right now to see me? She must be.”
Kita saw a sliver of the child she used to be, wide eyed and expectant of good things as she turned to search, but just as the great mother is never present for death, the daughter typically follows. The gods are always watching except when mortals cry for another chance; when they look up to the sky wondering whether the war they’re told to fight for was worth it; when they raise their fist at the world that had not once treated them fairly.
The dead can no longer worship. There is no reason to continue watching them until the very end.
“No,” he eventually replied.
That child disappeared. The woman returned.
“So it’s just you then?”
“Just me.”
“How lonely.”
The work is necessary. It matters not if he is lonely. It matters not if no one praises him because of it. Kita chose not to tell her that.
“A little bit more, then, my Lord,” she said urgently. “Let me stay a bit longer, please, it’s- it’s spring.”
“And so it is.”
“Everything’s funnier, see,” the woman uttered weakly, taking one last look at the people tripping over chairs as they pushed against each other, the spirits making them laugh instead of shamefully angry, twirling and jumping and clapping along to the melody of the lute that soared like birds. “Lovelier.”
Her forlorn stare stayed on the ancient tree in the middle of the hall, the blushing buds on its majestic trunk and its sprawling, moss canopied branches carrying lamp lights, fireflies leading the eyes to the stars in the sky.
“And so it is,” Kita repeated.
There’s another one after her. Kita could not delay any further.
When she finally looked at him— really looked at him, and saw him for what he truly was, the woman began to look at him as if he’d snuff out everything funny and lovely about the world.
And she followed him with her head down and without anything else to say.
Kita thought that he’d heard crying. It no longer fazed him.
The work resumed.
Once, you were a child and easier to like, and your mother did not mind that you fumbled with the laundry. You were small. Easier to understand. Too much energy bursting out of you to pull the sheets out of the line without breaking the clothespins.
She'd release an exasperated tsk-tsk and that would be the end of that. Even when you dragged the immaculately white sheet into the mud, swaddling it over your head as you raised your hands into claws, shouting when you ran towards your mother, "Here comes the three-headed beast! Best watch out, mortal!"
The sheet smelled like the earth after the rain, pleasantly mingling with the aroma of your mother's dress. Oranges, apples, and fresh bread caressing your senses as you nuzzle your face into her stomach, clinging to her, refusing to let go.
Warm and soft, the damp cloth against your eyes had the exact same smell, gentle as it brushed your lashes. It coaxed you awake, despite the heaviness pulling your eyelids down.
You held the instinctive urge to chase the hand holding that cloth.
Back then, you had been your mother's little innocent daughter. Easier to forgive. Deserving of comfort.
Now, you are not.
The ceiling that greeted you was testament enough. So far above. Not the low hanging beams of your mother's house with dried herbs dangling upside down. Here, there were lacquered black pine arranged in a perfect grid, elaborate carvings of butterflies fluttering on the corners where they meet. The recessed panels in between were wide, each one painted with a camellia or a blooming chrysanthemum. A gallery of flowers for mourning. In the middle were delicate strokes of red spider lilies.
Death spoke.
"Go back to sleep," he said, lifting the blanket closer to your chest. You nudged his hand away and sat up, wincing as you did.
The futon was plush, like the white chemise that replaced your ragged dress. Although neither mattered much when your limbs were too numb to feel anything else. He watched you as you stared back at him, only for a brief moment, then shifted on his folded knees to wring the washcloth into a basin next to him.
You turned towards the veranda, where there was an open view of the sky. Or the closest thing that the Underworld could have to a bright, sunlit sky.
There was nothing there. Just stark white light illuminated under a dome. The Lord Death’s mansion towered over everything else in this world and you wondered before what it would feel like if you reached out your hand to touch it. (Perhaps it is cold and empty and if you knock you’d be responded with a hollow sound.)
That thought of wry amusement did not last long enough to alleviate the helplessness.
At the foot of the hill grew bamboo the size of pillars.
A sea of glass green where the valiant and virtuous rest, reminding you of what you’d lost and cannot get back.
How ironic it was to already be on the other side of death and still be deaf to the whispers of those who had passed. All the more ironic for someone who was supposedly hailed as their queen.
(Once, there was a time when you thought that the possibility of hearing the dead could make this place tolerable. At least you would know that you were still with those you hold dear. At least you could hold onto a semblance of home. But many, many years passed and all you could ever hear and feel and see was him.)
"What do they say about me?" you asked, staring at the forest.
He paused from soaking the cloth.
"Not the ones that you worry about. Those who are good would never speak ill of those they love,” Lord Death said. “They would not be there if they were to hold any grudge at all, besides.”
What were you thinking, asking him that. He is not one to make reality less terrible than it actually is. Such is the nature of Death. But in this matter— well, you can never tell.
“My Lord,” you sighed, “With all due respect, but I do not think that you would know what those who can love are capable of."
“If I gathered correctly…”
The voice of Death was calm, almost pensive.
“I take that you mean,” he continued, “that those who can love are also capable of punishment meted out of anger.”
You looked at him. Tiny droplets of water seeped from the washcloth and into his fingers. It barely dripped out anymore, yet he still squeezed the thing as if every thread of cotton were drenched.
“Resentment.”
You flinched.
“I killed them,” you told him. “I deserve that much.”
“Your mother had chosen to deprive them—”
“—Because I was selfish.” Your breath was becoming labored and you could no longer meet his eyes. “And all they ever did- all she ever did was love me. The resentment. The anger. She wouldn't feel those so acutely had she not loved just as fiercely."
"And they are mine to bear," you added. "All of it.”
After folding the washcloth into a neat square, Death moved closer, and you could only sit there, transfixed, as he fixed the sleeve of your chemise that’d slipped past your shoulder.
You felt his skin warming yours through his robe. He sat beside you, one hand moving to lift your chin, his hold light as a feather.
“You speak of your mother’s affections with this mouth, but it's her voice that's coming through,” he muttered. “Tell me, Spring, cannot you use your own?”
How dare he.
“She's my mother,” you spat back, recoiling from his hand. “She was my god.”
“So am I.”
Death was not something that your kind will ever have to become acquainted with, but every time he gets like this— looming over you with that sharp scrutiny, his power wielded insouciantly and as naturally as death takes life— for a split-second you are but a mortal that would trade away all the wealth in the world just to evade him.
But you are not a mere mortal, are you not?
You are Spring. Daughter of Harvest.
Perhaps not anymore, but you’d been one all the same.
So you swallowed thickly and met his gaze.
“You raped me.”
Never mind that your voice cracked, you pressed on.
“You raped me. What more could you possibly want.”
“Anything,” he replied, not missing a beat. “Just not your guilt.”
A disbelieving huff, then a chuckle that sounded as broken as it’d felt. Distancing yourself from him as far as your feeble, cumbersome body would allow, you hung your head low as you let the rueful laughter die in your chest.
“Why?” You finally asked, brows furrowed.
The question, you found, was not really for him. Tossed into existence for the sake of letting it known: to the empty dome of a sky; to the Fates; to the forest sitting peacefully below you; maybe just to the blanket in your grip, wrinkled out of place, chemise disheveled to reveal your thigh.
Why?
“You should hate me. I hate you. In fact,” you scoffed, “you should throw me to the deepest pits where the wicked go. Leave me there and condemn me and leave my name cursed forever. I disrespected you, time and again, and I let your children die. I let your children die, my Lord.”
Your skin was unscathed, the insides of your legs the most spotless they'd been, not just in here. Even when you were up there, enjoying the caress of the sun, you had never been as uninjured as you are right now. No sign of wound, fresh or on its way to drying. No gold oozing out because you scraped against a rock, or got caught in the waves attempting to cross the river, or wittingly hurt yourself to destroy the god growing inside your belly.
You are clean.
He bathed you and tended your wounds.
Just as he’d done countless times before.
“It doesn’t change what you’ve done to me. But that doesn’t matter, does it? You are God. Death itself. You get to hurt anyone you want and we’re supposed to just accept that. That is your lot in life. It would not matter to you if I forgive you- I’m not even— ha! I’m not even in a place where I can forgive you! I just have to stay on my knees! Take it all in silence, don't I? Beg for your forgiveness! Be remorseful for- for wanting something different, something kinder! Because I feel! I feel! I do not exist because of you and I do not exist for you! And when you hurt me I’ll give as much as you’d given me and I will cry out when you pummel me and break me and- and—”
�� And he’s hugging you, cradling you on his lap, sturdy arms wrapped tightly around you as racked sobs and words that hardly made any sense sputtered out of you.
And he did not say hush, little girl. Enough. Enough or you’ll taste the back of my hand, little girl.
And this is not love, even if he let you cling to him as if you were a small child that was easy to like and easy to understand and deserving of comfort.
This is not love. Love simply does. It comes to you on its own just as the seed grows towards the light. It is not acted upon in such a way that you pull it by its roots, destroying and making a mess out of the only place it calls its home.
But—
Is that not what your mother did?
Spring?
Ignoring the sharp stings that shot up your feet, you loosened yourself from his hold and scrambled to stand up.
"Wh-” you rasped. "Did- did you hear that?"
He held you up when you fell back into him, keeping you steady with a gentle grip around your waist.
"I heard my name," you said, panting and desperately eyeing the forest as if the green sea of bamboo would whisper back to you.
And you know it would.
"I heard my name. Someone called me. I think it's..."
Them.
The word withered before you could utter it. You looked down at him, imploring.
He smiled.
A small curve of his lips that had briefly, just for a passing second, made you forget who he was.
"I told you," he whispered. "In time."
"I don't understand."
The voices that had been inaudible to you. That look in his eyes, open and defenseless, wistful and yet…relieved. As if he could cry at any given moment.
You could not understand any of it.
The question had been stewing at the back of your mind for a long time. There's no way of ignoring it now as he sighed and closed his eyes; as his perpetually unbowing shoulders collapsed under your touch, and as he rested his forehead against your hip:
How is it possible that death can be so tender?
"Just.." he began, hands caressing the back of your legs. "Just come to me, my love."
Rough-hewn fingers kneaded away the dull pain from the muscles, inducing a shiver that ran up your spine and making you hold onto his head for support.
He rumpled your chemise, exposing your skin the more he dragged the article with the fervid brush of his hands, his lips pressed on the curve of your thigh.
You gasped at the feel of his hot breath. "I don't want to punish you," he said, grazing his teeth against your naked flesh. "I don't want to own you."
"I'm not like her," he murmured, almost snarling. “I’ll mend you and take care of you everyday.”
This isn't the first time that he's done this. He's been above you, rutted into you while he had you pinned on top of him, had spent nights between your legs like a man starved, but this is the first that you contemplate, if not reluctantly, how soft his ashen hair felt, the ends like ink spilling through your grasp.
You tugged at it, only slightly, but he immediately bared his throat and gazed up at you so fiercely it made you glance away, although not in fear, not in disgust, not anymore, the heat that'd been spreading all over your body threatening to combust you right where you stand. He must've caught on too.
Because he never took his eyes off of you as he left a trail of kisses along your thighs, light and sweet, lingering to take in your scent every now and then, moving slowly towards where you ached the most.
Too slowly.
"Please," you sighed as you scratched his scalp, pulling his head closer.
(Please? Please? What's happening to you?)
"I have a name, wife," he replied, licking the sweat clinging to your skin.
"Kita," you said in a hushed tone. "Please."
It surprised you how easy it was to say, considering that all you've done thus far was pretend the name never existed, that he'd never tirelessly entreated you to call him that ever since you'd recited your vows.
And now here you are.
You felt him smile against your skin. The rumbling of his chest as he chuckled accompanied your weak, shaking knees.
"You're so beautiful," he said under his breath.
Long fingers parted the thick, coarse hair on your mound, stretching the skin below along with it. And before you could even release a tensed breath, your husband had already moved to latch his lips on your cunt, an open mouthed kiss that left a loud, indecent smack.
He ignored your surprised yelp and continued to prod with the tip of his tongue, again and again, stoking the fire in your belly. He kissed the slick bundle of nerves as if it were your own mouth, tongue brushing sloppily, sweeping across and drawing out moans from you. The soft, gentle pursing of his lips betrayed by the way he grabbed your ass, blunt nails digging into both cheeks until it hurt, restraining your bucking hips and bringing you into his mouth like you could not be any nearer, when you could already feel his nose flattened against your cunt, cutting himself off from air just to breathe you in and savor you.
You wanted to say something. A hasty command for him to stop. Everything was happening too fast for comfort and you were going to lose your head anytime soon if you didn't cease grinding into his mouth.
"Wai-" you moaned, shivering when he brought up a finger to tease your hole, dripping thickly as he stroked languidly. "St-stop."
He slipped a digit inside, then two, still devouring you, all lips and tongue and just the barest hint of teeth. And this madness had to be put to a halt. You couldn’t muster to register anything beyond his hands all over you, his mouth, his low groans, him. You didn’t think.
You yanked him by his hair.
Thunderclouds in your fist, dark gray and angry, the gravity of what you are doing falls upon you and makes you buckle in his hold.
You are taking part in this act.
You are no longer the abducted bride who remains voiceless as an act of retaliation during a coupling. No god can punish you, you finally accept, not here, and there is no longer any need for you to stifle the urge to cry for fear of another beating. You are not on your knees, begging.
In fact, it is Death who is.
His mouth surrendered without a fight. Your thumb found its way on his lower lip, and he immediately opened to suck as you rubbed the wet flesh, his eyes telling you that in the grand pantheon of gods there is none higher and none more worthy of devotion than the one in front of him.
This great, incomparable, and immovable creature— an enigma to both the impermanent and the eternal, has thrown himself at your feet. There's a part of you that is waiting for the curtain to lift. Soon, laughter will ensue at your expense because only a fool could ever manage to conjure the thought. Let alone consider its possibility.
But it is there.
It is true.
Death is yours to do with what you will.
Always has been.
“Stick out your tongue,” you whispered.
And he did.
With unsteady limbs, you inched closer and rubbed your throbbing clit on his stiff, waiting tongue, back and forth, back and forth, keeping a sluggish rhythm that has the spit pooling in his mouth.
You released a thick, dissipated curse, the one that you often hear among mortals in the shadows during revelries. “Fuck,” you moaned, half expecting the stinging bite of your mother’s belt. It did not come. You could only laugh.
Filthy. Filthy. You are filthy.
“Don’t move,” you hissed at him.
And he did not.
“Don't touch me,” you huffed as you rolled your hips, slinging your leg over his shoulder. You swore you heard him whimper as you grabbed his head with both hands.
You could tell that he was itching for it, the feel of your waist, your ass. He wanted to reach up and grab your tits. Oh, he looked pitiful. How he'd give anything just to touch you and make you feel good.
“Are you mine?” you asked, stripping your husband with your foot, tactless, his robe caught between your toes. "Do you promise?"
Kita nodded without hesitation and you smiled.
"Go on then," you told him, guiding his hands to your breasts, your fingers hastily intertwined with his. You whimpered as he started fondling and pinching and pulling at your nipples.
You're so close.
You cried out when he flicked his tongue hurriedly against your sopping clit, drool spilling down his jaw as you swivel your cunt harder. He picked up his pace, his tongue moving faster and faster the more desperately breathless and shameless you screamed his name.
That familiar sensation that he introduced to you approached like a storm. The anticipation for that flash of hot light that seizes your entire body is exquisite now. Not numbed by indignity or by the fact that he'd taken you without your consent.
This time you welcome it, letting the tides crash and drag you along with it.
But because he's Kita and he's your husband, he immediately grabbed your thigh, mooring you to him, his other hand supporting your back in order to keep you from falling once you were finally reduced into spasms.
He caught you.
He carried you and kept you safe back on his lap after you came and your limbs had gone boneless. You stayed there in his embrace, eyes closed and feeling his chest rise and fall like he’d been running for miles.
So human.
So unlike him.
“We can always make another one, you know,” he suddenly spoke.
You looked at him, at that pallid face now beaming with sweat and a spark in his piercing gaze, a certain recklessness in them.
In this light, mussed hair and all, you could almost believe that he was only some farm boy who’d promised himself to the neighbor’s daughter, flowers in hand with a kiss and a song to give despite her mother’s objections, naively courageous in a way that only the youth can be.
It made your heart ache.
His hand brushed against your stomach and you became aware of the fact that something hard had been poking your wet quim.
He eased you into his cock with a gentle glide of his hips, the meaty girth just barely entering as he tells you, “You apologize for far too many things.”
“We have all eternity to make amends,” he said and you shook terribly when the tip brushed under your sensitive clit. “And to make another child.”
At this, he entered you with a grunt, laying your back on the ruined futon while you’re twitching and squeezing down on his cock. He wrapped your legs around his waist and raised your ass with his hands, keeping his seed from leaking out of your cunt as he thrusted.
Kita was a vision above you.
Death the God, your husband, eyes closed and brows knitted together as he fucked you, cheeks as red as the painted spider lilies framing his beautiful face.
(You were a daughter once. A wife now. A mother soon.)
(You will never be your own.)
You were on the verge of passing out, pleasure tingling your nerves in a low simmer, and you can hear it.
Hear them.
The sound of feet thumping against the earth in a merry dance, the joy of drunkenness, lovers giggling among themselves.
You threw your arms around your husband's neck, his body sweating and panting. Enclosing him in your weak embrace, you grinned to yourself, weary but enraptured, as they sang the song of sweet, sweet spring coming home.
The funeral bells are a divine order as much as they are a ritual.
When tolled, it means that respect must immediately be paid to the dead, and mourners and strangers alike have to set aside their grief in their little snot rags, no matter how keenly they feel it, and march to say their farewells to the one who used to walk among them.
The funeral bells did not ring for this one mortal, Kita observed, because no one mourns those who defied the Lady Harvest.
What’s left of her home had already gone up in smoke.
Her remains were among the ashes that covered the small plot of land.
A seamstress. Orphaned too early. Clever, as she had managed to survive all twenty and four years of her life with only hard work and an eye for colors.
Clever.
Clever did not suffice.
She ought to have been wise, and capable of knowing her place. The youngest princess had already been betrothed to a pious maiden, one that was favored by the Lady Harvest, no less. That wasn’t much of a problem. Not really. Not to gods. Many a lowly mortal has fallen for someone above their station.
A seamstress who deemed herself worthy for the princess's love was no different from a boy who believed that his wings were all that he needed to get himself close to the sun. The boy's wings were made of wax. The heart of a poor seamstress was no match against the goddess of harvest.
This story has been told countless times before. The beginnings change, and so do the names, but ultimately they all end the same.
Kita remained among the tall brambles, out of reach from what the fire had devastated, as he watched you, back towards him and bare feet on ruins. You hadn’t stirred for quite a while, so it was with curiosity that he stayed to see why you’d suddenly bent on one knee.
In the blink of an eye, spider lilies sprouted out of the soil. Kita has no other way to describe it, only that with the flick of your wrist the world became new.
Like dusting the earth clean. No more ashes and grief and the sharp regrets of those left behind. Only the bright, vibrant hue of red, red, red.
Kita looked down at the flowers brushing against his cloak, pointing to where you stood, and followed. He stayed behind you but did not call to your attention.
“She doused herself in oil,” you said. “Burned everything.”
He knew that. He let you continue anyway.
“Where will she go?”
You looked back at him.
“Where did she go, my Lord?”
You’d been talking to him.
“You know me,” he replied, a little late and a little shaken.
“How could I not?” You shrugged weakly. “I’m always there when they come into this world, it seems only right that I’m also there when they leave. And you are," you chuckled, “punctual, to say the least.”
You’d been watching him.
“I see you, you know. All the time.”
The breeze was cool as it danced with his hair and Kita had the odd urge to cry.
"I like it when you talk to them. You don't have to, don't you? But you still do. You are very good, my Lord."
He should say that it was necessary. It had nothing to do with being good. He wasn’t. He does it everyday because that is just what it is. It matters not that he is perceived as good. It matters not that someone else regards it for the valuable work that it is. It matters not that, for once, someone understands.
“You still haven’t answered me,” you told him. “Where did she go?”
You are every bit the Spring that they make songs about. He felt the need to cower at the sight of you, but like a child urged to play outside by the field of flowers and balmy weather, Kita stepped closer.
“It depends,” he said.
You rolled your eyes and threw your hands up, as if surrendering begrudgingly.
“I’ve had enough of riddles! I’m sick of bending over backwards, my Lord! Why can’t you just say what you mean!?”
You are infuriated. Of course you are. This death has upset you. They care for you deeply because you care for them just as much. And to know them is to know him. And to love them is to—
Tears had sprung from your eyes. Kita wanted to wipe them.
“Oh, my Lord, forgive me! I didn’t mean-”
He hadn’t even moved yet. Moreover, what he was planning to do certainly didn’t warrant raised arms, face covered, as if you were protecting yourself from him. Kita was not going to hurt you. But it seems that someone already had.
Bruises marred your skin. Some fresh gashes on your elbows. Too small and too precise to have been caused by a slip up while doing chores. There were a number of them that they cannot be attributed to a clumsy nature either.
“Who did this to you?”
In truth, Kita needed not ask. He’d once almost crossed paths with that infamous wrath of the Lady Harvest. He is familiar with her proclivity for lessons that must be imparted with an iron fist. The difference between you and him is that he’s Death. You are simply her daughter. A lesser entity to one pillar that held the universe together. And so you are the one who’d ended up like this: afraid and beaten.
He should’ve been watching hard enough.
“Who did this to you, Spring?”
You had to say it with your own mouth. “N-no one,” you mumbled. He wondered then why you’d gotten them. Spring has not faltered, not once. You are obedient to the whims of the Lady. Does it have something to do with caring for a harlot? What about mourning for a foolishly mutinous woman with a field of red spider lilies?
“I have to go my Lord,” you panted, scampering to remove yourself from his presence.
If he lets you, will you come back with another welt on your leg?
Worse. Kita knew that nothing would be left of you, when all is said and done. Unless, Kita thought, he had you all to himself.
None of them would protect you. None of them will take you from him.
None of them can.
Kita was upon you before you knew it.
You fought as he held you down. And he could’ve reasoned with you had you not tried to kick and scratch his face, that all of this is simply a natural turn of events, the same way one weeps in birth and in death. Your paths have always been locked to one another, he felt it in his very being as you bled and howled for mercy. Perhaps he’d been blind to it then, but just as he was meant to do this, you’ll learn soon enough that this, too, is your lot in life.
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Haikyuu Dick Headcannons Pt. 1
Ft. the Inarizaki men: Shinsuke Kita, Aran Ojiro, Rintarou Suna, Atsumu Miya, Osamu Miya
tw: excessive talk of dicks/cum, yandere undertones, no protection, allusions to anal but nothing explicit, fem reader, MDNI
He’s just barely over five inches, but he’s got enough girth to get you wincing every time he slips inside you. Overall, his cock is very masculine; hard lines, perfectly straight, with a prominent vein that runs diagonally across his shaft. He likes it when you trace along it, either with your tongue or your finger, always making him quickly suck in a breath. He’s moderately sensitive, but it you want to make Shinsuke crumble then you have to aim for his balls – they’re heavy, constantly full, always ready to emptied, preferably into you. The moment your nimble fingers touch the sensitive skin, Shinsuke’s groaning, his jaw working as he tries to steady his breathing, not wanting to come too quickly from just a few simple touches. He lets out these airy hisses of breath when you squeeze at them, almost sounding like he’s trying to hold back any noise – but you’ll see the dead give away of his pleasure with the way his thighs tense up.
His cum is thick, to the point where it takes a while when it drips down your face, feeling warm and sticky. It’s difficult to clean because it’s so sticky, getting everywhere and staying there, and it tends to glob up. It’s messy, and normally Shinsuke would hate it, but when it’s on you, it’s different. And god, when it’s inside of you, some switch gets flipped in his brain, the way it dribbles out of you making him feral. He likes to gather any leaking out of you and smear it across the inside of your thighs, pressing kisses against the skin and tasting himself on his tongue. If given the preference, he will always come inside you, and he tends to groan your name when he’s finishing. It’s higher than normal, sounding strained, and he’ll always shut his eyes tightly, the pleasure overwhelming him as he releases inside you. He always kisses you as the last few spurts leak from his tip, his tongue desperately toying with yours, his hands gripping onto your sides and thighs to try and ground him. He gets a bit carried away when he comes, the feeling making his head spin, and you can hear it in the way he breathes so heavily, see it in the way his cock twitches inside you, long after he’s given you every drop he can.
His favorite way that you touch him is when you clench around him when he’s fucking you in a mating press. It’s his favorite position; the angle, the view, how close he can get to you. He likes to keep your knees pressed as tightly as possibly, opening you up and leaving your pretty little pussy open for him. His eyes always manage to wander down your body to where he’s thrusting into you, watching the way he sinks into you again and again, disappearing inside you only to pull back out. He gulps when he sees the white ring slowly forming at his base, standing out against his pale skin and only getting bigger with each thrust back inside you. He likes the way the angle makes you feel tighter around him, the sensation making him grasp onto you tighter. He’s able to hit all those spots that get you moaning this way, and with each pounding against your g-spot, you clench down on him even tighter, until he eventually loses it and lets go, burying himself as deeply inside as possible so as much of his cum stays in as it can. He likes the way your cunt flutters around him in this position, massaging him and pushing him through his own orgasm. And when he pulls out, he especially loves the way it makes this graphic, dirty schlucking noise, as if your cunt doesn’t want to let him go, that one last suction on his cock making him want to fuck you all over again.
He’s a solid six inches with moderate girth, a thoroughly filling cock that’ll make every hole feel stuffed no matter how he fucks you. He does his best to stay trimmed and groomed, but he likes to keep things a bit longer because he doesn’t like the way he looks cleanshaven. He’s not especially sensitive, but he finds the way that feels best for him is steady, consistent stimulation – expect rhythmic motions with him, especially when he’s in your mouth and in your cunt. If you really want to get him shivering, though, you can target the spot at the base of his cock, on the underside right above his balls. He won’t moan when you brush your fingers along it, but he’ll stiffen up, Adam’s apple bobbing and his hand grabbing your wrist, motioning you to do it again. He especially likes it when you lick there, rubbing circles with your tongue as he sighs and subconsciously pulls your head even closer.
His cum is kind of watery, and tends to run once it lands. It’s easy to clean up, though, which is a good thing because he’s a bit fan of coming on your body rather than inside you or down your throat. He shoots the first round, but if he comes more than once he dribbles, the volume significantly reduced. He always lets out this breathy moan of your name when he’s coming, sounding almost as if he’s in pain. He throws his head back, eyes fluttering closed, and you can see the way his entire hips twitch alongside his cock, everything bobbing up and down from the jerky motions. He prefers to come on either your stomach or your ass, depending on which is available when he pulls out, but his favorite will always be your pretty cheeks, all round and soft and perfect to touch and grope. He’ll pull out and start vigorously fisting himself, his other hand finding purchase on one asscheek, squeezing harshly and groping, before lining his cock up with your ass and letting go, watching as spurts land over your clenched pussy and asshole, the white getting all over you. It makes him groan at the sight, and he’ll often lightly smack your ass, rubbing your cheeks together and then pulling them apart just to admire the sight again.
His favorite way for you to touch him is when you grind on him. Specifically, he likes when he’s standing behind you, your perfect little ass rubbing against his crotch, slowly getting him hard and pressing insistently against you. He likes the way it feels to have dull stimulation for a long period of time, and if you’re able to keep it up for a while, he’ll eventually be able to come this way. He likes when you’re leaning on something, and often he’ll ambush you against the kitchen counter, starting by humping at you like some dog in heat before letting you take over and grind back against him. Sometimes he’ll bring his hands up under your shirt to cup at your bare breasts, squeezing and pinching your nipples. He likes the way you feel so desperate against him, and how, if you’re wearing nothing and only his boxers are covering him, he can feel your wetness through the fabric, teasing him and making him ache for more. He likes riling you up, and while sex with you feels amazing, sometimes the buildup can be better than the finale.
He’s roughly five and a half inches, definitely enough for you to work with, though he is on the skinnier side. He’s not very veiny, instead just a lovely, smooth cock – pretty and without any blemishes, the kind you see and just want to touch and suckle. A small tuft of brown hair sits atop his shaft, a few hairs spread across the set of balls that a pinker color than the rest of him. The closer he gets to coming, the redder his cock gets, especially near the tip – it swells, too, the blood rush leaving him dizzy and making him fuck you even harder. He produces an above average amount of precum; when he’s kissing you and his hands are all over your body, excitement buzzing in his veins at the prospect of getting you naked and moaning his name, his boxers are already forming wet patches, a big, sticky mess when you eventually get them off. He’s a bit embarrassed by it, worried it makes him look too eager and desperate for you, but if you just compliment him and tell him that you’re excited too, he’ll just stutter out your name and look away, embarrassment mixing with bashfulness.
He’s a shooter but it doesn’t go too far, you have to get a bit close to get it on your body. His cum is always very warm and feels nice on your skin, even as it starts to dry. It’s opaque and unfortunately pretty bitter, but he really likes it when you swallow it. He won’t force you to, but watching the way your pretty throat bobs as you take it all makes his cock twitch, a small, sad spurt of whatever his body can scrounge up leaking out of his oversensitive tip. He’ll just stop and stare when you do this, lips slightly parted and harsh breaths coming out, his eyes a bit wide, the smallest whisper of your name on his lips. He’s also quite partial to finishing on your chest, especially if it’s cold in the room and your nipples are all hard and taut. He likes the way it runs down them, dribbling down to form little droplets, and sometimes he’ll lean in and suck them off, teeth lightly nibbling on the sensitive skin. He just likes seeing his cum on you, and it’s especially erotic to have it in such a dirty place.
He’s got this fantasy of you just absolutely manhandling him – in the bedroom he’s normally a bit more dominant (though very much a soft dom, if only because he really genuinely wants to make you feel good – his eagerness is almost palpable), but he secretly wants you to take control, and this extends towards your treatment of his cock, too. He wants you to suck him off, but to have your way with him; he wants you to grip him with force, your pretty fingers wrapped around his length while you lick at him, smiling up at him as you squeeze, tightly enough to make him hiss through his teeth, your thumb coming up to quickly swipe at his tip, making sure to pass over his slit. He wants you to suck at him, pressing wet, slobbery kisses up the sides but never quite the tip, never quite where he needs you. He wants you to tease him, to make his breath stutter and his muscles flex, but to never quite let him fall over the edge, keeping him right where you want him. He wants you to vigorously take him down your throat, bobbing your head up and down and blindly grope at his balls while he clenches his teeth and shuts his eyes, only to pull away completely, smiling up at him and telling him to hold on, not yet, I’m not through with you yet. He wants you to edge him until the last possible moment, and when you whisper to him that he can finally finish, he’s immediately coming, a grunt that sounds more like a shout falling past his lips. He just likes the idea of you using him for your pleasure, and while he’ll never voice this fantasy, every time he fucks his fist to the thought of you it’s what’s swirling through his mind.
It’s a solid five inches, with perfectly groomed black hairs framing the base. He’s meticulous about upkeep; he spends easily ten minutes out of every shower just trimming up, leaving a very short layer of hair there to make sure everything looks inviting for you, but not too perfect; he doesn’t want you to think he spends as long worrying about it as he does. (He wants you to think it’s effortless, like he’s just that sexy.) A few veins dot the length, none standing out super far, but it’s enough to run your tongue over when he’s in your mouth, which gets his knees weakening and nearly buckling. He’s pretty sensitive overall, but his cock visibly throbs when you pay attention to the tip; he likes when you drag your tongue along his slit or run your tongue around it, especially if you pull off of him with a big, wet pop noise. He just twitches a lot, cock jumping and making his balls jump, too. You can even make him twitch visibly through some of his pants if you whisper into his ear, telling him all the dirty things you want to do to him – and if you cup him over his pants, you can feel the movement, the warmth radiating through the fabric, and, if you’re lucky, even a little patch of wetness.
His cum is runny, leaving a slick residue as it slides along your skin, and an opaque, creamy color. It’s a little bit watery, but he likes the way it looks when it’s on you. It doesn’t taste too bad, but it is a bit salty, though it’s manageable to have in your mouth or to swallow. He dribbles, leaking out of his tip and sliding down his shift while he moans. He needs stimulation throughout his orgasm, and likes when you gently squeeze at his balls, the dull pleasure making his toes curl and prolonging his finish, so that you get every last drop of cum he can give you. He’s a bit whiny when he finishes, his voice higher pitched than normal, and his eyes squeeze shut, eyebrows drawn taut because it feels too good. His abs visibly flutter when he finishes, the muscles contracting and squeezing, while he tilts his chin back and tries to hump at whatever is still touching him. He really likes to finish on your face; seeing you painted in him makes him horny all over again, his cock springing to life mere minutes later because fuck, you look good covered in his cum. He also has a thing for finishes on your pussy, with you spreading the cute little lips so that he can see your clenched hole, his cum looking perfect all smeared across your thighs and folds.
His favorite way for you to touch him is when you ride him. He likes the way you clench him, the feeling different than every other way he fucks you. He likes when you go nice and slow, dragging your walls up and down his length, massaging the sensitive skin and making him grip onto your thighs. The way your ass feels as it claps down onto his balls with every downwards motion makes his head spin, and more often than not his hips will try to chase yours as you move upwards, desperate to keep himself inside you. He likes this position because there’s something about the way you look above him that gets him throbbing inside of you, your pretty tits on full display and easy to grab onto, bouncing in his face when you suddenly pick up the speed near the end. He likes to grab onto them, clutching on tight while you work him up and down, fucking him so impossibly deep that he swears he’s in your stomach, all the while you squeeze down on him harder and harder and harder. Atsumu likes when you alternate between thrusting and grinding, swirling your hips in circular motions and giving him a break when he thinks he’s too close to coming. Something about the motion feels good, and the way your face gets all screwed up in pleasure when you grind his tip against the spongy spot inside you makes precum ooze out of his tip and into you in copious amounts. He just likes when you ride him, kissing him and thumbing his nipples, even reaching behind you to grope at his balls. He comes harder that way, everything slowly dripping out around the both of you and coating his cock as you just keep going.
He’s a little over five inches; a nice, solid cock. It’s the perfect size to fill you up, stretching you out and making you hiss ever so slightly when he pushes into you, but not too much to hurt – he’s truly the perfect fit. He has this strange tendency of kind of man handling it; his calloused fingers will often grip himself at the base, running his tip through your folds or smacking your clit with it, liking the way you’re so soft and warm against him. He’s unfortunately not especially sensitive, so it takes him a while to come, but he actually kind of likes it because it makes him last a lot longer in bed, and he can multitask better. (It makes his thumb sneaking down to circle at your clit while he fucks you with your leg over his shoulder easier, more of his focus going into the movement so he can get tight, controlled figure eights against your sensitive bud and make you tremble.) Ironically, after he’s come he’s much more sensitive – he’s easily overstimulated and has to pull out immediately, otherwise his legs start shaking and his grunts become more like moans.
He’s a shooter, cock twitching with every spurt that splatters against you, contracting in time with his abs. It’s thick; when you rub it between your fingers it’s slimy, and smells like musk and an odd undertone of sweetness. It actually tastes good, or as good as it can get, all thanks to his diet – it makes you want to take him in your mouth, to suck the cum off your fingers, and while it still makes Osamu flush a bit every time you hum in content, he likes it. Especially when you have a drop or two still on your lip, dribbling down your chin, making you look so dirty. He’s a grunter, the sounds deeps and guttural, starting in the bottom of his chest and climbing up and up. Tends to grunt your name as he gets close, the letters blurring together until he’s slurring it out, melding it into one word that eventually just turns into a strangled nghh noise. His hips buck up when he comes, often times unexpectedly, which can sometimes choke you a bit if he’s in your mouth, or get you yelping as he reaches just a bit deeper inside you when he’s stuffed into your little cunt.
His favorite way for you to touch him is when you cockwarm him. He likes mixing sex and domesticity, and he likes having you perched in his lap, cunt all stuffed with him while your arms are around his shoulders, face buried comfortably in his neck. He likes to do paperwork while you warm him, his cheeks a slight red while the pen flies across the page, his free hand parked securely on your ass. He likes the way your walls clamp down on him, all warm and wet and soft, and because he’s not that sensitive, sometimes he’ll even forget he’s inside you until one of you moves, and oh – The shocked little groan he lets out will have you keening and grinding down on him, desperate for him to just fuck you. Osamu likes to see how long he can hold out – how long you can hold out – but most of the time these little sessions end with you bent over his desk, ass bare face pressed into his paperwork while he pounds into you like a man possessed. He even likes to cockwarm in softer, sweeter settings – watching a movie together, with the blanket thrown over you and your cunt sucking him in, his balls sitting tightly against your ass while you laugh at the movie, his eyes on you and his mind fixating on the way your every chuckle makes you clench, so that you’re even tighter, something that makes his fingers dig into your sides. Even these sessions end with fucking – he just has to have you once he’s been inside you for hours already.
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