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#yeah no i gotta stop thinking
tardis--dreams · 2 years
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Lol 30 years sounds long but when you say '30 winters' or '30 Christmases' it suddenly makes you realize just how fleeting life is and that you only have a very limited amount of time you get to live and wow now you're crying and are overrun by a sudden wave of existential dread and anxiety
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deoidesign · 25 days
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Hm... I'm feeling benevolent...
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If nothing else Koenma is a Kuwabara stan and I'm right there with him o7 (I need to write the kuwameshi fic that goes with this fr)
#maybe one day i'll write that au i have sitting in my head#ever since the comment he made about making kuwa spirit detective instead ive been thinking about it#like...what if yusuke is still recruited same as canon but like#kuwa was already spirit detective? doing assignments for the guys upstairs and all#and they made yusuke help him after his resurrection instead of going solo#and it's hilarious because they still have the ''rivalry'' set in place so it's like#now i gotta be coworkers with this guy i was in a fist fight with last week?#yusuke is like you can't be serious you want me to fight DEMONS with the guy who cant even beat ME? lmaooo okay#kuwa would be more in tune with his powers atp in this au and super offended like hello#why would i use my reiki on a FELLOW HUMAN CHILD you DICK i can hold my own on my assignments just fine#but he's actually really excited to be able to spend time with yusuke doing something besides getting his ass handed to him#they're both genkai's students (she's endlessly annoyed but they grow on her)#i just think it'd be fun cos like#it'd be harder to exclude kazuma from shit if he's literally been involved in this shit before he even met#kurama and hiei#kuwabara isn't really told about yusuke's resurrection so things go mostly the same up til he's brought back#they're both called to koenma's office and it's the spiderman pointing meme 💀#it's koenma's first time seeing kuwa in person as he usually just sends assignments with botan#yusuke has already seen him cos of the resurrection arc#and koenma is SUCH a fanboy ''kuwabara it's such a pleasure. you know you're my best worker 🥺''#''um urameshi am i seeing things or is that a fuckin baby'' yusuke will NOT stop laughing#it fucks koenma up so bad he makes sure he's in his adult form when he's around kuwa next#cos he wants to be the respected boss but also guy that you can chill with!! he's so cringe#okay yeah i need to write this it's such a fun concept#kuwameshi#yu yu hakusho#kuwabara kazuma#yusuke urameshi#koenma
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quirkle2 · 6 months
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Shigeo still doesn’t know how to answer. He hasn’t answered, and he knows that’s weird, and maybe a bit creepy, but it’s also characteristic of him, so maybe he doesn’t need to stress over it. He simply sits there in the heavy rain instead and watches Reigen’s pink tie get dragged by the gales. And then Serizawa crouches down, lowers his hand out, and shelters Shigeo’s head with the draped fabric of a clear umbrella. In Shigeo’s world, the rain stops.
scene from my wip fic recondite :]
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sleepinglionhearts · 3 months
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I haven't touched Genshin in over a year at this point, yet Jun haunts me
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m0e-ru · 10 months
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underpaid
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frankcastlescumslut · 11 months
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What If
Matt Murdock x Fem!Reader
Summary: Family Planning w Matt Murdock
warnings: mainly fluff, maybe some angst? not really, mentions of pregnancy,
A/N: short little blurb that absolutely nobody asked for this but oh well!! I want it!!
It was calm in the apartment for a Friday night. The smell of Josie’s was confined to the hamper of dirty clothes in the corner while hints of lavender scented body wash permeated the bedroom. It was calm. Peaceful.
It was a nice change; your nighttime routine including Matt, for once— there was something homey about it. Domesticated. He was there, just around the corner, pulling the sheets back and adjusting the pillows to your liking before you would both climb into bed and recount your days to one another as if you had been married for years.
You were afraid that if you verbalized the thought, told him you enjoyed not sharing him with Hell’s Kitchen for once, that the illusion of peace and routine would snap. That he would snap, and you would go back to the familiarity of falling asleep alone again, only to be awoken by a bruised and heavy body falling next to you.
Some things were better left unsaid, so you kept quiet, brushing your teeth in circular motions until you noticed the blood dribbling from your lips.
You almost didn’t hear him, his question drowning behind the gargling water in your throat.
“What if it’s not enough?”
Enough?
“What’s that?” you yell into the sink before wiping your mouth with the back of your hand. “Did you say something?”
The bedroom was dark, your side of the bed bare, the comforter pulled back as an invitation. He was concentrating on something, his brows noticeably furrowed even as your eyes adjusted to the darkness.
“What happens when it’s not enough?” He followed the question with a kiss to your temple as you positioned yourself into the side of his body.
“When what’s not enough, sweetheart?”
“Daredevil.” The stunned silence speaks for itself. “The firm. You. Us.”
Us.
You.
Me.
Your body stiffened at the thought of being lackluster to him. That your life together was somehow incomplete.
Dread quickly spread throughout your body, practically pulling you away from his body, untangling just enough so you could prop yourself against the headboard.
“Well,” you cleared the knot in your throat. “I would ask you what ‘enough’ means.” The chipped paint on your fingernails stole your attention. “What does ‘enough’ look like? Did I do something wrong?“ He was blurry when you finally looked at him.
“No!” God, what an idiot. “No, you didn’t do anything at all!” He was quick to hurry you into his chest, internally damning himself for being the cause of the lump in your throat.
“Then what’s wrong? You just said I wasn’t enough—“
“It was a poor choice of words, that’s my fault, I’m sorry.” His heart galloped in his chest, just beneath your ear. “You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me and I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you.”
“But?”
“Everything is good— great right now,” his grip against your frame grew tighter.
“But?”
“But it still… it still doesn’t feel like it’s enough.”
“Then what can I do to help? What do you need, Matt?”
The confusion began to transform into a mild frustration, and you were grasping at imaginary straws, trying anything to answer his impossible questions.
“I want more.”
The air became stagnant in your lungs as you held your breath.
“No, wait,” he stammered. “I want more of you! I want more of us.”
“I’m not following.”
“I want to start a family.”
The air left your lungs in an impressively long exhale, long enough for you to untwist from his grip and lean against the headboard, suddenly forgetting how to breathe.
“A family?” The mattress dipped beneath your palms and your neck groaned with the weight of your head. Your stomach churned, from both relief and anxiety.
He waited patiently, pushing himself next to you. His breathing was steady, an inconspicuous cue for you to follow his lead, and he gave you both physical and emotional space to process what he himself had been grappling with the past several days.
A baby.
“A family?” You repeated, desperate to read his face.
He was unable to conceal a soft smile, and you softened in return, inching your hand closer to his so that your fingertips barely touched.
“With me?”
“Only if you want to.”
His fingers interlaced with yours, the pad of his thumb rubbing melodic circles into your skin.
You would be lying if you said you hadn’t thought of starting a family with Matt before. He would be a wonderful father, that you were certain of, and there were times where you would catch yourself holding onto your stomach, fantasizing about how your appearance would change with a growing belly.
Many of your closest friends were having children or had already started their own families, so it wasn’t that out of the ordinary to think about your future with Matt, but you never allowed yourself to think that way or to go that far, given the implications of his second job and moral obligations.
“What about Daredevil?” Your voice was unwavering, much to your surprise.
“I have it under control,” he said with a lighthearted smile.
“Under control? What does that mean?”
“I got some help. It’s taken care of.”
“Taken care of?” His voice was so steady and matter-of-fact that your eyebrows raised automatically. “Did you just happen to pick someone off the street?”
“He’s from Queens, actually,” he laughed.
“Right,” you huffed in tandem, not fully understanding the connotations, but enjoying his ease nonetheless.
The room grew with a bloated silence, and for once, you allowed yourself to wonder. How does maternity leave work? Would he take paternity leave? Would you breastfeed or bottle feed? Are there any good schools in Hell’s Kitchen? Who would watch the baby while you go to work? Why aren’t there any cute boys clothes? Will a crib fit in the room? Would they look more like you or him? What if you dropped the baby? What if you’re not a good mom?
“Sweetheart,” he called, bringing your hand to his lips, as if leading you away from the cacophony of what ifs and hypotheticals.
“Hm?”
“You okay?”
“Yeah! Yeah. I’m just—
“Thinking.” He finished your sentence and you deflated automatically, resting your head against his shoulder.
You weren’t sure of how long you sat like that. Inhaling and exhaling. Inflating and deflating. Slowly sinking into the mattress, disappearing beneath silk sheets.
“You’ve really thought about this then?” You whispered, afraid to jinx something so precious so soon.
“More than you know.” He kissed your temple, emphasizing his sincerity.
“I have one requirement.”
“Go on,” he stretched an arm behind his head, enjoying the simplicity and ease of the conversation.
“Call me old fashioned, but I want to be married first.”
His laugh mimicked a bark, and for a second you were almost embarrassed by your reservations.
“Sweetheart,” he turned onto his side, somehow towering over you, before meeting your lips with his own. “I am Catholic, you know.”
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skitskatdacat63 · 11 months
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“Do you think love can bloom even on the battlefield?”(Monaco 2010-2013)
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zebratimw · 11 months
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Spirit animal SQH
#svsss#shang qinghua#but mainly I'm just here to vague post LMAO I don't like to vague post its not very effective in terms of venting but#but basically I guess I'm becoming hyperaware of my like... cognitive dissonance codependency and derealization ee#also my general laziness ig and where it overlaps into executive dysfunction or whatever like I may genuinely have some issues but#I am also a lazy son of a bitch jfjfkgkg and i need to figure out how to figure it out so I can work on both in more effective ways hhggg#oh yeah but basically the thing to remember for later is the silence in the call and the immediate unmute and chat activity once I left#I should remember this and stop interacting I think? I should try to give em space I think I'm being too clingy or something#or maybe my own silence is too awkward and dampens the call? I was kinda just spacing out and not doing anything so I get its kinda weird#LMAO so I should just like try not to be in call for those times mm#I just like being in call with my friends jdhfkg but I suppose its not very good either#I overindulge I suppose another friend pointed it out to me before too haha but fjfjjt its just easier than facing bouts of dread by myself#eehh and that's why I gotta do something about my Metnal Ailneses hfjfj but ngl I don't really know how to go about it...#I get embarrassed looking stuff up djfnfkg and half the time I don't even know what to look up I just draw ?s and I give up#I suppose I also have commitment issues too but that ones not new which is an issue of itself aaaaaaaa#man idk idk I just don't really get it I guess djdjfjf and I've got existential dreads and think maybe it doesn't really matter whats wrong#cause there's no point to fixing them because ultimately I'm gonna die alone and a failure anyways? so like ehfjgkg idk#its depressing and I know its like sabotage cause my brain is being a little silly a little goofy and its not a shared sentiment#with the better half of me and the entirety of my friends but yknow its just ee harder sometimes to believe in the optimism ig#and i can talk about it somewhat normally and without like having a ✨️break down#but yknow djfjgkg I'm very emotional a person ya? I think sqh is relatable for gods sake 💀#irrationality sentimentality nihilism and existential dreads... wanting to die because living is too hard despite all my hopes for living...#just the ol regulars yknow?#and another thing... do I talk to my friends about these things? I vent them out here a lot but what do I really want?#I'm not strong enough to keep it to myself clearly but I'm also too proud to share these thoughts? I dump them out in the open and for what?#whenever someone reaches out with concern and care I don't respond in kind and refuse to elaborate?#so like what do I want with this? I guess I want someone to know I'm going insane half the time I'm awake? but not do anything about it?#that's pretty unfair I guess... and stupid I think I do want to share my thoughts with someone but I'm too scared of the ramifications#and that my pride can't stand the fact I might be looked differently by my friends even tho the image they have of me is already quite silly#man.... idk.... I'll come to conclusions myself and do nothing about them so I guess that'll happen again aah idk idk idk
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strangerwheelerthings · 3 months
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I don't know if it's because it's been too long since I last watched Stranger Things, but I genuinely don't remember a happy Nancy scene post Barb...
This is such an interesting thing to think about because it's not as if Nancy looks miserable in most scenes of the show. In fact, she often looks determined and occasionally excited even. She has smiled before, but excitement about progress in a case, something she's passionate about because of Barb, isn't necessarily happiness. So this is something you have to look beyond face value for.
Nancy suffers quite plainly with survivors guilt and with a lot of trauma. She isn't healed from what happened in Season One, and I don't think she even let herself really start until after season three. Not with so much unresolved. She also hasn't had the help she really needs either. However, Nancy has experienced happiness since Barb's death. There are moments she forgets. It’s only healthy that she's not so obessively mired in her misery that she can't have moments to breathe.
It's been a while since I've watched the show, too, so I can't say if there's a Jancy scene where she's just happy. Their get-together scene was very in the middle of Barb trauma, the wake up together scene is very stressed and rushed. Jonathan has been good to her, but all their scenes are a very mixed bag of emotions with happiness not really being the predominant one.
There are three small scenes from season four that come to mind. The first is Lucas's game. Nancy is quite genuinely proud and happy for Lucas in that moment of success. It's such a small shot, but it's one of a few scenes that show us that Nancy cares a whole lot more about Mike’s friends than she ever says.
The second is the scene with the dog, right before the plot plummets Nancy right back into her guilt complex. She's starting to live, and she lets herself be, for just a second, when she steps away from a murder investigation to just play with a dog. This is the first real evidence that her passion for her work is not just about Barb anymore.
The last scene is the officially friends scene with Robin. It's simply a moment of establishing connection, and both girls are just so warm in that moment. It's another sign of Nancy starting to actually heal. She's happy to have a new girl friend, not scared or guilty like she would have been before.
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snailwitdamail2 · 6 months
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calling it now. the new apes trilogy is gonna have an ape/human kiss like the og movie did.
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moeblob · 7 days
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Karen has four older brothers and this is Ross! He's the second oldest and he looks rather polite and smiles a lot and when he's at work he can behave most of the time... but he really has such a foul mouth it puts Right to shame.
And Karen when she was a kid couldn't pronounce S's and they sounded like Z's. So when her brothers would be leaving for school she would say "enjoy zool" and just. Could NEVER say Ross's name correctly so he told her to just call him Oz. And it stuck but only with Karen. She's the only one to use it and no one else is allowed.
#my characters#also fun fact she has decided to legally rename him for when shes mad at him#so instead of yelling his full proper name#she will yell OSWALD THOMAS WILSON which is the fake first name but actual middle/last#and its just thats a guy that she wouldnt want to admit to knowing if she saw him in public#hes actually p short so yeah hes a short king#the oldest bro and the second youngest are both taller#the middle middle is basically the same height as him so karen really is just the wittle bab#and all her brothers are super protective of her bc thats their baby sister#she does however have a strong sense of I GOTTA PROTECT THE MIDDLE GUY#so she is kinda used to standing up for older guys just bc of he#but it comes into being a problem when she meets rick and is like fuck it he may be older but#he is too kinda for this world and also theres no way i can love him hes basically a baby brother#and she will pick on him but also would absolutely throw hands for him#and and i know the tags are long as is but eventually karen and rick move past the whole youre like a brother vibe#and they become very good friends - still zero romance involved - but she starts to treat him less like a family member#and it makes him feel less awkward and in turn he feels more open to joke sometimes#cause for a long while rick is just this is really awkward and i wish we would stop matching on dating apps but she wont leave me alone#so its rude to turn her down when she offers a friendly drink to check up on me#but its actually karen being protective older sister mode despite being the youngest of five#this is the most i have managed to draw in like two weeks i think#now im super tired bye
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retros-artandstuff · 22 days
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homestuck doodle dump
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moghedien · 8 months
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i want the show to have Rand tell Lanfear that he knows she turned evil because Lews Therin broke her off and for her to just immediately start ranting about tenure and about how you make ONE little mistake and create ONE little bore and suddenly everyone is mad at you all the time and you can't get a third name and you're an embarrassment to have around
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chiquilines · 5 months
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I just like putting them in silly little outfits
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theradicalace · 3 months
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do you ever think about how saiki is. a kid. like yeah he's 17 and if you count the time loop he's technically older but he's literally a high schooler. he is actually a kid who had insane amounts of power and responsibility thrust onto him against his will. fucks sake he literally had to Save The World on more than one occasion instead of being able to like. be a normal highschooler. MAN.
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