#and how another year has passed me by without me making any progress and just wasting my life away

[tardis--dreams]

Lol 30 years sounds long but when you say '30 winters' or '30 Christmases' it suddenly makes you realize just how fleeting life is and that you only have a very limited amount of time you get to live and wow now you're crying and are overrun by a sudden wave of existential dread and anxiety

#and by 'you' i mean 'i' #i don't know why my brain just did this #but i was thinking about how it's almost winter again #and how another year has passed me by without me making any progress and just wasting my life away #and that somehow every year is passing faster and faster and that i experienced almost 30 winters (the coming one included #because earlier when i walked my dog at night it was so cold i felt like it was winter and I got a weird sensation of nostalgia #and now I'm scared #idk of what #maybe that another 30 winters will pass and i'll feel the same just more sad and unhappy and ashamed because i never accomplished Anything #or maybe that this might be my last winter and i won't experience another one where i don't feel dead inside #yeah no i gotta stop thinking #I'm making myself cry #shut up amy

[nocreativityfornames]

Random Obey Me! Headcanons

Belphie doesn't know how to swim and is too lazy to learn. The brothers have tried to teach him multiple times, but he always ends up giving up before he can make any real progress. He even fell asleep in the water while Satan tried to teach him once, and after that, the brothers just collectively gave up and accepted he'd probably never learn how.

Lucifer is terrible at baking and making any kind of sweets in general. This is funny, considering he's one of the best cooks in the house when it comes to preparing literally anything else. And Satan absolutely thrives off of this, as he actually masters all areas of the kitchen and will brag about how it's one of the things he's better at than Lucifer.

Beel loves rock and metal, they're his favorite music genres to listen to and motivate him when he's doing his morning run, practicing for future games, or going through his workout routine. He actually learned how to play drums because of it, and even performed in a concert when a friend's band was doing a show, and the friend called him a few hours earlier saying he couldn't make it and needed him to take his place. That day, multiple videos of the concert were posted to DevilTube and went viral. Everywhere, people were discussing how talented Beel was, and the brothers even encouraged him to enter the music industry. He refused though, saying he wanted to focus on sports as it was his main passion.

Satan was born a baby, though he grew faster than any other demon or angel. The way I picture this is that he would stay the same age for a few months and then jump to another out of nowhere, for example: he'd be 3 years old for a few months, and then suddenly jump to 5, staying that age for another set of time till he jumped to 7 and continued the cycle. This only stopped when he reached the age he'd originally have if he had born when first formed as an emotion in Lucifer's body. And so he now ages normally, as any other demon would.

There's a magic barrier around the House of Lamentation that stops any demon that's not one of the brothers, Diavolo or Barbatos from even passing the gates. But as mentioned, it only works on demons, hence why Luke was able to sneak in without the others even noticing during season 1. And this is the same for the Demons' Lord Castle, that also has a magic barrier around it.

Mammon smokes. It's his way to relax after an especially stressful day, he'll stand on the balcony staring at the view outside, alone in his thoughts for as long as he needs to. The brothers understand, as they all have their own ways to cope with stress, and always make sure to check on him at some point while he's there or after. Sometimes though, on very rare occasions, Lucifer will actually go and join him. They'll vent to each other about work, their day in general, and whatever is on their mind while smoking together. Those times are very special for both of them, as they can just chat and relax together without worrying about anything else, knowing they'll always have each other.

The characters' speech gets jumbled when they're drunk, they just start speaking multiple languages at the same time and it only gets worse the more drunk they are. For example, Levi will start spilling Japanese words and sentences in the middle of conversations, Solomon will talk in Old English and confuse everyone, and Lucifer, as the affectionate drunk he is, will just start mumbling I love yous and a bunch of soft praises in Infenal to his brothers and MC. It's a mess.

Levi is one of the most popular streamers in the Devildom when it comes to gaming, anime reviewing, and weeb content in general. He's everyone's favorite, and the one people go to for opinions before purchasing anything. He gets sent games before the official release, merch, figurines, etc. And although most of his streams involve just him, sometimes a brother will join. Mammon and Beel for the most part, but the others have all participated at some point. ( Fun fact: Levi broke his record of views when Lucifer accepted to join him after years and years of pestering. They played Minecraft together, chatted about random stuff, and the viewers were blown away seeing a new side of the eldest, as they only viewed him to be intimidating and unapproachable. To this day fans beg for another stream between the two, but Lucifer always refuses, saying that was the first and last time. )

Lucifer taught Satan how to play piano when he was younger. The fourth born however grew to resent the instrument, lumping it together in the long list of things he'll never pursue again because of how it only makes him more similar to the eldest. He does miss it sometimes though, and very rarely, when he's alone at home, he'll play one or two songs to himself and think back to the lessons Lucifer gave him long long ago.

Beel gives the best massages ever for some reason. You'd think not because of his size and clumsiness, but he actually knows how to control his strength and be a perfect mix between gentle and rough. Oftentimes Beel uses his skill on his brothers, mostly Lucifer and Levi as they're usually the ones staying sitting for too many hours at a time and end up stiff as rocks afterward.

Asmo has an OnlyDevil account where he shares spicy pictures/videos of himself that his fans go absolutely crazy for. His account is very popular and he's actually one of the most sought creators on the platform. Needless to say, the amount of money he makes out of it is no joke.

For some time after lesson 16, Beel didn't know how to interact with Belphie or how to even feel about what had happened, making him avoid the twin completely. It got to the point where he couldn't even stand sleeping in the same room as him, seeking Mammon every night to sleep with him instead. The second born never minded, as sharing a bed with the younger one kept the nightmares of MC's death away.

Satan has always been extremely sensitive to certain sounds, textures, and tastes. For example, there's a brand of milk he absolutely despises for how weird it tastes, despite all the brothers ( including Beel ) insisting that it tastes the exact same as any other milk they've had. There's also a certain type of fabric he can't wear because of how it feels on his skin, numerous foods he can't eat as they give an unimaginable ick, and noises that make him physically cringe at how uncomfortable they sound. The brothers have been aware of these things ever since Satan was born, and although they don't completely understand it, they always have it in mind when buying something for him or finding themselves on cooking duty.

In the Devildom, birthdays are celebrated every 100 years. Diavolo however is an exception to this rule, as he is of royal blood, and his birthday is made into a huge annual event across the entire kingdom. Following this, the brothers only began celebrating their birthdays annually once MC came into the picture, as they wanted to experience as many birthdays as they could while they were still around.

Lucifer regrets not accepting Satan as his son from the get-go, cursing his past self for denying responsibility for the blond when he was first created and the poor way he treated him. But he didn't know any better, he had just fallen after facing a war against his own problematic father, and the last thing he wanted was to label himself as someone's parent. But now he really wishes things had been different, though he's already accepted that it's far too late now, as thousands of years have passed and he believes he's lost his chance to make things right an eternity ago. It still pains him to this day though, to see the change in Satan's expression whenever someone makes the even slightest suggestion to them being anything more than brothers.

I've already made a separate post about this one, but the brothers can sense their sins on other people and feed off of it. Also, demon blood is dark black, while angel blood is bright gold.

#yes satan is neurodivergent here #obey me shall we date #obey me #obey me post #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me mc #obey me diavolo #obey me solomon #obey me headcanons #omswd #thoughts thoughts thoughts! (⁠๑⁠•⁠﹏⁠•⁠) #☙ no creativity for names ✾ #1k+

[oharababe]

CONCEPT 02 －professor rivalry with miguel

professor! miguel o'hara x professor! reader mature: just the two of them bickering. wc: 581 academic rivals to potential situationship.

Molecular Biology and Genomics; two subjects of science that interlink with each other. But unfortunately, you and Miguel do not.

The two of you have this competition in the subjects you both teach your area of interest is molecular biology, whilst Miguel's is genomics. Both of you are professors at Neuva York Institute and this rivalry started back when you and Miguel started as students. Competing for the same grades, trying to come up with impressive projects and research and challenging each other when it comes to critical thinking and debates. Even now as alumni and professors of NYI, the fire between you and him hasn't extinguished. 

You and Miguel always clash when it comes to the subjects you both teach. There isn't a day that goes by where neither of you would miss out hearing each other's name in the classes you both teach. "Oh? Professor O'Hara said that learning about the ACGT bases is just a child's play?" You repeated, nodding to yourself as you tried not to sneer in front of your students. It's not their fault that his students are also your students since both subjects are certainly connected. They think it would help them progress to another year of studying.

You can almost hear Miguel's voice in your head, scoffing at you in his usual treatment. "Well, tell him as the professor of genomics, he should know that without understanding the concept of our DNA molecule, the area of his interest would just crumble into a hypothetical theory. To do a genomic mapping without learning about the DNA structure would just be a fantasy thought in the science department if people wouldn't bother to take my subject. Pass the message to O'Hara, would you?" 

When it comes to presentation research proposals, Miguel is always five steps ahead. He explains his scientific research clearly and thoroughly. But you always find a weak niche of his to point out and debate it. And in Miguel’s case, he shows no mercy towards you about your research proposals. Finding every little fault to the tiniest detail. “That wouldn’t work because the genetic code doesn’t match with what you wanted and it won’t get you the protein you want for your DNA,” Miguel argued. “You’ll have a shit genomic library for your research so come up with a better proposal.” 

You and Miguel would bicker at any point in time. But what’s more applauding is that everyone in the institute thinks that you and Miguel are suited for each other. Even daresay, the two of you would fall in love, already acting like an old married couple. Ha, as if! 

No matter how many times the two of you happen to be in the same room together, making a cup of coffee or tea at the same time, you can’t see yourself falling for someone like Miguel without frowning. No matter how many times you catch his gaze and he catches yours, the tension from the glaring across the room heightens, you don’t see how people can fathom the thought that you and Miguel are meant to be together. 

And no matter how many times you and Miguel bicker in the shared lab room, bodies leaning close intimidated in frustration as the two of you pick on each other’s thoughts, you convince yourself that in no way the two of you would start kissing from the heated passion. Even if that thought lingers in your mind at every argument with Miguel. 

former molecular biology and genomics major here 😭 i graduated uni like three years ago and did both subjects. it was a blast and i did lose hairs from the intense learning. i'm working on professor rivals with miguel fic because i cannot get this out of my head. professor miguel does things to me and i want you to experience this with me too.

TAGLIST GROUP:

@99matterss @tojishugetiddies @miauamy @pigeonmama @oyayablog @therealloopylupin2099

#miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o'hara x y/n #miguel o'hara x you #miguel x reader #the miguel effect #miguel o'hara drabble #miguel spiderverse #across the spiderverse #across the spiderverse imagine #miguel o'hara blurb #written by © lavie #* jan 24 reads

[kichous]

✧･ﾟ:*   you could use me

summary. you're afraid that two weeks in a box is all that it takes to undo all of the progress you've made. series. a night of dark trees. bonus scene ! pairing. gojo satoru x gn!reader. warnings. none. word count. 1930.

Gojo’s different.

Ever since he emerged from the Prison Realm, he has been taciturn, morose, subdued. It’s disconcerting. He’s one of the liveliest people you know. It’s one of the things you love about him.

You’re still not sure how he says those little words so easily. Gojo Satoru’s world was torn asunder years ago, and he’d been dealt the same debilitating, staggering blow that still causes you to panic every time you hear the three syllables ‘I love you.’ Yet, somehow, some way, Gojo finds it in himself to voice that simple declaration to you. And he means it every time, with every fiber of his being.

It’s harder for you to speak it, your vocal cords uncooperative to an almost petulant degree, your subconscious locking the action away even in spite of your visceral protestations. You’re still searching on your hands and knees in the murky depths for the key. Only alcohol makes the search a little easier. But in your heart of hearts, you know it—it is a certainty that you love Gojo Satoru. A fact, as immutable as gravity (unless you were Kenjaku. Then you’d have to come up with another simile).

To that end, his absence hurt you. The moment you allowed yourself to fall for someone else, to finally move on from that one great loss, he was torn away from you. But it’s not his fault.

It must've been infinitely worse to be Gojo himself, stuck in what was essentially a cursed deprivation chamber for any duration of time from eternity to an instant. Not sure if eons had passed or but a second. Not knowing if the world burned his absence and those who remained rued his name, or if it had survived and everyone moved on without him. If anyone even bothered looking for a way to free him. You tried to put yourself in his place, imagining if he had gone and found a third love while you were trapped. You would’ve been happy for him, but you couldn’t deny that the simple idea of it broke your heart.

After he emerged, you stood by his side, your hand in his as he was informed of everything that had happened—everyone that had died—during his imprisonment. With every word, his shoulders sloped more and more, crushed by the weight of the world in each consonant and each vowel.

He won’t talk about it with you. When you kissed his temple and stroked his hair, uncaring of your audience in Shoko and Ino, he’d sighed and leaned a little closer. But he was silent as stone.

You wish you knew what to say to him. The way he and Geto bantered was so instinctual, an easy back-and-forth like a tennis match. You can hold your own with him, no doubt. But you’ve also got a history of deepthroating your foot where he’s concerned, so you can understand why Gojo’s a little hesitant to confide in you. He’s never had to before, why should he start now?

Oh, maybe because you love each other and that’s what supportive partners do—lean on each other? If only he’d stick around long enough for you to just tell him that.

Naturally, he refuses to make anything easy for you. Satoru’s hardly alone these days. You can’t even fault him for spending every waking moment training. If he’s going up against the King of Curses, he’ll need every advantage he can get, no matter how confident he is. You support him where you can in that regard, but you have no choice but to ambush him in between sparring with Okkotsu and sparring with Maki to actually get a word in.

“Hey, dumbass,” you call as you approach. Where it might’ve elicited an equally dry ‘What’s up, shitlips?’ once upon a time, it now earns a tired smile. Not the ideal reaction.

“I didn’t do anything,” protests Satoru, allowing you to soften the insult with a quick kiss. He’s sitting on a bench with his legs wide enough for you to step in the space between, and he wraps his arms loosely around your waist. “Why’re you being such a meanie?”

“Why are you overcompensating?” The verbal suckerpunch gets him in the solar plexus, causing Gojo to stare up at you wide-eyed with his mouth falling open defensively. You press a finger to his lips. Satoru goes a little cross-eyed trying to focus on it, and so you flick him on the nose to retrieve his attention. “I get it, if it’s for the kids. You’re their teacher. You’re everything they want to be when they grow up, they see you as a protector, blah, blah. But you don’t have to be strong with me. I know you. I know you. You don’t have to pretend, okay?”

“Don’t I?”

That stings, probably more than he meant it to. You don’t imagine Satoru ever intends to be cruel, because even at his worst, his sadism is meant for curses. But you’d thought he considered you an equal. Or as close as one could be without being a special grade, at least. It was foolish of you to think that the wall between you had crumbled any, at least as far as your skill level was concerned. It’s been years since anyone ever talked about how you could’ve become the fourth special grade if you ever managed to get a tighter rein on your technique. Okkotsu’s taken your place since then.

Your teeth sink into your lower lip as you move closer to tuck his head into your sternum. “No, you don’t. We’re partners, aren’t we?” you whisper, running your fingers through his hair. Something warm stirs in your chest as his eyes flutter shut and he hums a quiet, pleased purr. You’re a haven to him. “You love me and I—I love you. That means you don’t have to do this alone.”

He says nothing at first, simply nuzzling closer. There’s no sound but your shared breath, steady and even. His arms tighten around you. It’s a little uncomfortable having to crane your neck down to kiss the top of Satoru’s head, but the little sigh he gives is worth it. It’s the little things with Gojo. With such a bombastic person, large and grandiose efforts are commonplace, attention-grabbing gestures all Satoru knows. The strongest must be larger than life. So you end up treasuring the opposite—the way his long, spindly fingers fit in the slits between yours, the way his long lashes tickle your cheek when you kiss, how he loves to rest his elbow on your shoulder when you stand next to each other, the perfect roost. These tiny bits combine to make everything feel grounded, real.

After a moment, he pulls away, and light starts to creep back into his eyes. They look more like the sky again, rather than an iceberg field in the Arctic Circle. Good. “Does that mean I can tap you in during the fight?” Satoru asks cheekily.

You toss your head and give an exaggerated tsk. “I haven’t decayed from my Grade One rank, I’ll have you know! I may not be a spring chicken, but I can still pack a punch!” For emphasis, you smash your fist into your other palm.

“Not a spring chicken?” Satoru repeats incredulously. “We’re the same age! What does that make me?!”

You tug lightly on a few strands of his snowy hair. “A geriatric old man, duh.”

He raises a brow. “Oh yeah? Could an old man do this?”

Satoru’s up on his feet in an instant, one hand sliding up your back and the other wrapping just below your shoulders as he dips you in a kiss. He savors it, plying gently past your lips with his tongue. Satoru moans as you slip your fingers through his locks, a sound that makes your lips and extremities tingle. He steals the breath from your lungs, and you don’t hate it.

“Well.” Your voice is but a rasp when he finally pulls away. The man radiates smugness. Somehow, you find it endearing. “I’m sure Harrison Ford could.”

Satoru’s face breaks open with a full, hearty, genuine laugh. Pulling you upright to use as an anchor, he buries his face into your neck. His entire body vibrates in tandem with his giggles, the warmth of his breath a pleasant sensation on your skin compared to the wintry frost around you. Satoru blinks as you use your index finger to tip his face upwards. “What is it?” he asks, a little breathless.

“I love your smile,” you tell him honestly. “I love you.”

His cheeks grow pink. You doubt it’s because of the cold, your heart fluttering at the thought. You’ve managed to make Gojo shy. In lieu of a verbal response, he gently rests his forehead against yours. You’re aware you’re probably obstructing the walkway, and that if any of the students happened upon you, they would violently gag, but you can’t bring yourself to care.

Satoru is here, in the flesh. You thought you’d lost him when he got sealed away, and then again when he emerged sweeping the broken pieces of himself under the rug. That even if you could hold him, it wouldn’t be the Satoru you loved, nor the Satoru who loved you. Who saw something broken in you that was worth cherishing, worth putting back together piece by painstaking piece. Who never faulted you for giving up but encouraged you to try again, whose heartbreak echoed yours and stood as proof that there was a brighter tomorrow. The Satoru who taught you it was okay to be okay again. You’re sick and tired of lost chances, of what-ifs and what-could-have-beens. Maybe that’s why the words finally, finally slip so easily from your mouth—so you wouldn’t ever miss the opportunity to tell him again.

Gojo rubs his cheek gently against yours, sharing his heat. He’s always run a little warm. “I promise that I’ll share my burdens with you from now on. Even if I can’t promise you won’t hate me by the end of it.” A solemn vow, the seriousness of his tone unfamiliar to you. But not unpleasant.

“I already knew loving you was going to be rotten work,” you tease. “That’s never bothered me. What you can promise me is that you’ll come back to me. Otherwise, I’ll bring you back as a curse when you die. You’re not getting rid of me that easily.”

Satoru chuckles. “Will you at least make sure I look prettier than Rika?”

“She heard that.” You have no idea how long Okkotsu’s been standing there—what he heard or saw, whether he’s going to blab to any of the other kids. There’s a small bemused grin on his face, but it’s eclipsed by the overall chagrin of his furrowed brows. He’s embarrassed for you. PDA at your old age? His generation probably thinks you look like two skeletons mashing their teeth together.

Breaking out of your frozen shock, you and Satoru share a glance. Then, after a moment, you break the silence with simultaneous cackling. It’s hard to tell whether it’s the situation or the looks on your faces that sparks such an interminable fit. You fall against each other in your laughter, using one another as a column. He’s sturdy and solid and he’s there for you. And that’s what you’ll be for Satoru too. Steady and strong and unmovable. Unbreakable. Everything he’s been for the world, you’ll be for him.

Whatever it takes.

#gojo satoru x reader #gojo x reader #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #anodt tag. #jjk fic. #we're pretending 236 doesn't happen #or at least we're believing every rebirth theory we lay our eyes on #hey at least he ended up in fewer pieces than reader's first fiancé!

[yoodokjas]

one of the many things i hate orv for is making me be so dependant on yoo joonghyuk getting a happy ending— it's all kim dokja's fault i swear i wish for it so bad. the thought of this man not being able to be at peace and happy in a world where his friends and family are there without the scenarios, makes me mad with a grief i didnt know i was capable of feeling for a 'character' 🥲

(what's also funny is that yoo joonghyuk's happy ending, where his friends and family are happy and well, kim dokja is also there standing besides them. But kim dokja cannot even imagine a world where he can be together with them without 'failing' and atoning. 💀✌️) a happy ending for yoo joonghyuk would be one with you as well kim dokja you fool

aughh anon the entire content of this ask has been on my mind for months. do we have some sort of a mind link be honest. also this will have spoilers for epilogue and side story below

aghh kdj wishing for and working so hard for yjh's happiness truthfully translated into us wishing for the happiness of that sunfish too I'd say. 1863 abandoned lives and worlds existing solely to meet his sponsor and find the reason he exists, which is also linked to said sponsor, made him feel liberated and at peace. a feeling which only kdj, said sponsor, took issue with. his guilt is so huge, so strong, he cannot fathom that yjh will not resent him after having his tragedy be used as someone's sustenance.

after kdj split himself into 51 and 49 in order to atone and sustain the world in which yjh and the rest of kimcom will continue to live, he'd already started imagining how their lives would be. 49 and yjh would search for tls123, 49 would read hsy's novel, 49 would attend ljh's graduation etc. what he didnt count for was kimcom regressing to get him back.

after the group regression, yjh says that his story has already ended now that his reader is no longer there. some time later, astronaut yjh sets on a space journey to spread orv and piece kdj together except that he fully expected to die and the mission to fail because just like kdj had learned to live from him, yjh no longer knows how to live without kdj anymore. in fact before sp and 999 gang save him and biyoo appears yjh fully expects that his -- will be 'death' (as if kdj would allow that smh).

after nearly a hundred years he descends into lhh's worldline. i think most of us know that lhh is 49 kdj's reincarnation by now, what i didnt catch the first time around however was that yjh and lhh met right after lhh considered committing suicide (lee "i have no trauma" hakhyun is a fucking liar) but chickened out in the end

a few thousands more years pass and yjh returns to the 1864th worldline. he talks more, he smiles easier, he no longer cares what his -- will be. and hes let kdj choose for himself whether or not he wants to return. he has been kdj's reader for thousands of years, he Understands what it means to get the will to survive by reading someone's story.

and in the side story he wants to take that choice back. he'll bring kdj back himself. cuz hes obsessed. hsy failed so now is his turn. except that his turn hasnt started yet. so who knows.

anw tldr yeah you cannot divorce kdj from yjh's (happy) ending. if any number yjh hears abt kdj in whatever way shape or form he'll get curious abt him. 41, for example. even after excluding lhh, 41 got curious abt kdj. hsy shows him a happy memory of our yjh which included kdj and 41 fucking collapsed (i become more excited abt the side story the more it progresses) and lost consciousness. it was such a strong memory of kdj and kimcom eating yjh's cooking and kdj saying how he cooks so well and he should bring more beef next time that hsy described it as yjh dying from happiness. yjhs -- is kdj related in one way or another. kdj just has to Get It that yjh cannot be happy without him

#ask #orv #yoo joonghyuk #kim dokja #yjh meta #joongdok

[writingquestionsanswered]

Hello I have a question on behalf of my friend who doesn't have tumblr. So, my friend has been working on her long story for about 2 years now when she found time after school. However, it was recently discovered that she has a tumour in her brain that she will have surgically removed within the coming months and while she told me the chances of anything happening is low, she is still worried and has expressed concern over her story. She told me that she has so much of the story planned out but not written down, so many details or plotpoints etc.... So her question is: how can one prepare for the worst case senario if you have an unfinished story? There are so many details and conversations that need to happen.

Friend Concerned About Surgery/Not Finishing Story

It's very nice of you to ask on her behalf. Just to clarify, though, I'm not a legal expert, so I can't give you or your friend legal advice. Just some ideas based on personal experience.

As much as I wish this would be an easy thing for your friend to address, it isn't. Our stories are copyrighted the moment they are written down in a tangible form, and if something happens to us, that manuscript and all of the pertinent documents and notes become part of our estate. That said, it would be up to the executor of the estate to determine what is done with the story based on the person's wishes as outlined in their will. If someone wanted another person to finish the story for them, they would be designated as this person in their will and the executor would contact them and give them any documents and instructions that were needed. But, ideally, this will have been arranged between the writer and other person long before. If there isn't time for those conversations, your friend could put as much of the detail and instructions as they can in a document and have it kept with their important documents.

If your friend doesn't have a will or an estate (if they're a minor, for example), this is just something that will have to be arranged between them and the person they want to finish their story, but they should also make sure to notify their parents/guardians that this permission has been given, and may even want to give the person a notarized document stating that they give the person permission to finish the story. Otherwise, the friend's family could potentially file for copyright infringement.

I worry a little because I remember getting a similar ask a while back about someone who had been reading a story in progress, and it looked like the writer had passed, and this person wanted to know if they could just finish the story since they'd talked to this person and knew where the story was going. And I'm hoping this ask isn't coming from the same person looking for some loophole that would allow them to go ahead and do this. So, just in case and to clarify: you can't finish someone else's story without their express written permission. It doesn't matter whether that story was posted online and abandoned, or whether they told you what was going to happen and you're the only one who can finish it, or even if you had a verbal agreement. The best anyone could do in that scenario would be to contact the family (who either hold the copyright or have a right to contest infringement) and ask for permission.

And, in the case of this ask specifically, if the friend wants you or someone else to finish their story if the worst happens, they need to make sure they have granted you written permission that is notarized or otherwise legally commissioned.

Ultimately, your friend probably will want to talk to a lawyer. Though, I am deeply hoping that they come through their surgery safely and successfully so they don't have to worry about it. ♥

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

♦ Questions that violate my ask policies will be deleted! ♦ Please see my master list of top posts before asking ♦ Learn more about WQA here

#tw death #tw surgery #wqaadvice

[mysticstarlightduck]

Personality Through Quotes Tag

I was tagged by @illarian-rambling (here)! Thank you so much (:

MY PROMPT WAS: "A quote about siblings"

YOUR PROMPT IS: "A quote about their relationship with money (in the past and nowadays)"

I'll go with the main cast of "Of Starlight and Beasts" for this one!

Corah: "Oh I wish I had siblings! I've always wondered what that would be like - I mean, I've seen enough siblings around that I have a rough idea, but that's always such an individual experience. It would've been cool to have someone my age, other than just regular friends, around at all times. Though I'm sure we'd have driven Dad crazy with our antics if that was the case - I was chaotic enough on my own (giggles)."

Arammys: "The bond between siblings is among one of the strongest there is, and often one of the purest. At least that's what I...think - in my intuition, I mean. I haven't had any progress in recalling my memories, so I can't speak of my own experiences with siblings - if I had any at all - yet. But something tells me that my intuition might be right, at least in my case. At least I hope so and I want to remember whoever they were, or are."

Eidan - "I didn't have any siblings or parents, but my older cousin fit both of those roles perfectly throughout my childhood - he was the closest thing I've ever had to a true family. We didn't have much - we often had nothing at all - but we had each other, and he always kept me safe, and was always there for me when I needed him the most, even if we sometimes annoyed each other to no end. And though he was not my brother by birth he was by choice - and I just wish I had known how lucky I was before it was all too late."

Masen - "You know, having siblings ain't what it's cracked up to be. Especially if you have a twin. Yeah, it's all loyalty and mushiness until they've got something else they want to achieve - and that something's more important than you. Then they stab you in the back when you least expect it and run off with the people with the money into a perfect new world where you're not invited - Yeah. (shrugs awkwardly) I realize this got a bit too specific, my bad."

Kyran - "What even is there to say? You're born, and so are they, you grow up trusting one another until they start hanging out with shady people and become someone you barely recognize, and then you annoy the hell out of each other and don't speak for the next five years. Oh, and then they blame you for leaving them when they were the ones who made that mess to begin with -"

Elias - "(Without a drop of emotion in his voice) My siblings are the reason I truly believe I will have gone fully grey before 30. I'm almost certain they're trying to make it a competition. They're twins. I do not know where I went wrong with my life but here we all are. Now pass me the rum."

Tomasa - "I don't have any siblings, Gods know Ma had enough trouble keeping me in line when I was a little ankle biter. But I've been told having 'em is like flipping a coin. You are either best friends for life or want to kill each other. Sometimes both, from what my friends tell me, ha! I don't really fancy having any siblings of my own, if I'm being honest - but having someone I could prank 24/7 does sound really tempting. I guess Arammys will have to do (laughs, already plotting her next prank on the poor, unsuspecting mage)"

Nimwen - "I've learned your true siblings aren't always those you're bound to by blood. They may be, sure, but not always! Sometimes, the strongest family bonds are those we choose, bonds nurtured like a small weed that grows into a mighty tree - and I personally know that to be one of the most important truths of life. "

Rin - "I never really cared for that. That's just another word - and that's it, a word. Most bonds are a fantasy made to comfort the hearts of the common folk from the harsh truth. Real people are fickle, they don't care for you when they've got no use for what you have to offer. My Nest surely didn't. (There's a moment of pause and a sense of sorrow behind his eyes before he shakes it off with a sly smirk, hiding it) But who cares for that sentimental junk. Besides, gold's a much more reliable company, don't you think?"

Leora - "Family is the most important thing in the world - by blood or by choice it matters not as long as the sentiment is there and it is pure. I would do anything for my siblings and I know they would do anything for me. I know this all too well. Where we come from, you learn to make your actions and your words count - you never know what tomorrow might hold and you must cherish those you hold dear, always, because they can be taken from you. At least, that's my perspective."

Florynce - "Mine have been dead for many years now. I remember all of their names." (You think she's about to say something else about them, but she changes the subject so jarringly you almost feel whiplash) "I don't wanna talk about that. Do you want to see this cool bug I found? It's glowing."

Tagging: @mk-writes-stuff, @eccaiia, @the-ellia-west, @memento-morri-writes, @little-peril-stories, @littleladymab, @kaylinalexanderbooks, @talesofsorrowandofruin @doublegoblin @oh-no-another-idea @cowboybrunch @ybotter @thepeculiarbird @crowandmoonwriting @your-absent-father @rickie-the-storyteller @jasperygrace @jay-avian @saltysupercomputer @winterandwords @autumnalwalker and OPEN TAG

#wip of starlight and beasts #personality through quotes #writeblr #writing #writers on tumblr #writerblr #writers #my wips #character writing #writing tag game #my characters #my writing

[laf-outloud]

https://www.tumblr.com/laf-outloud/743807030266036224/did-you-get-the-ce-email-jensen-is-now-already

Okay, so I’m going to move past me knee-jerk annoyance over CE being passive aggressive about Jared by calling Jensen THE Headliner in a few emails now. I mean, jared is only at half, or less of the cons this year, and maybe he even stipulated that this is the last year with them. Eithe way, Jared distancing himself is clearly his decision, seeing how many other cons he’s signing up for.

So, moving on from that … I find it absolutely insane that CE is doubling down on the Jensen only cons (as headliner) for 2025 when it’s barely 2024. CE hasn’t even done a single con yet this year, and the ones without Jared are largely not selling well as it is. Why do they think this is enticing to anyone but AAs? I’m not sure how late in the year J2 cons are comparing because they are so far off, but the ones up until August are selling out, or pretty well. At least they seemed to learn their lesson on trying to make Misha a headliner, or banking on cockles panels to appeal to the majority of fans. But, not having J2 takes away almost all the appeal of a CE con, because if your only getting one, you might as well go to a comic con or something, where it’s considerably cheaper.

Anyway, I looked at the 2025 con, and the Gold Pass prices are still similar to the ones this year, include J2 cons, and Jensen' Photo Op prices have gone up. This is wild to me in what will be 5 years after the last season of the show. I get that they must be getting desperate, but that just doesn’t even make sense to me. People are still trying to scrape money together for cons later this year, never mind 2025. There can only be so many rich women with free time to go to the ever-more-extensive CE cons, and who need to get close to Jensen that badly. Even if Jensen has a significant part on Season 5 of the Boys, I still don’t see him selling out cons with him alone as headliner. I don’t see him doing anything to bring in new fans, especially the type to want to pay big money to go to cons.

I’ve already seen friends on SM talking about being glad they already have cons booked for this year, because they were already unhappy with changes CE is making in cons, their greed, and now this development. Lots of people look like they will be opting out of CE cons after this year, and that’s from people who go fairly regularly.

I want to go to one last con this year, but I’m debating if I want to give CE my money any more at all. But, this might be among the last chances to see J2 together (which I enjoy), so I’m still considering it.

I think we have reached the end of an era in the SPN fandom, or we are at least in the final gasp.

You're laying down facts, anon!

It appears that Burbank is the weakest of the non-Jared cons this year, so I suppose the others could pull out better numbers, but you are definitely right that this feels like the last desperate gasp of a dying tradition, especially if, as you say, even regular con-goers are giving up.

I still think Jared will attend some CE cons (possibly one a quarter), especially if they do another in Austin, but mainly to maintain his SPN legacy.

This will be a very telling year for Creation and I suspect that as the year progresses, we'll see more discounted tickets (MinnCon 2025 tickets are already on sale), and likely a reduction in the number of cons for 2025 (no matter how much certain actors rely on them... CE can't keep paying the actors' attendance fees if the ticket sales won't cover them.)

#ask box #anti creation entertainment #jensen critical #convention speculation #creation conventions

[mormorando]

i've been struggling to be my best friend's best friend because with time i'm becoming increasingly aggressively anticlerical and as she progresses as an organist she's becoming increasingly confined to the clerical spaces (even though she's agnostic) so she'll say something like 'hey sorry i'll reply later, i'm with the people from the congregation' and then i wish i didn't text in the first place because i lose any and all willingness to talk to her 😂‼️

my experiences with christians are just so fucking bad lol... recently i rejected a person who then told me i am nothing, worthless and no education will ever fix that and i will have to sell my body to survive because it's the only part of me that's worth anything at all, and he was a pious christian. i mean like citing bible verses in daily conversation type. who tried to convert me first. and the person who tried to convert me another time at a party only to then make out with me to 'test if she likes girls too' without ever questioning if i WANT TO make out with her was a christian and it was such a disgusting experience, i felt so used, like an exotic animal - godless and same-sex attracted, yk, so you can really treat her anyhow, she's not One Of Us, not a person, she has no inhibitions. i sometimes really feel like christians, even women, find out you're atheist and from that derive you don't really Need dignity, that you are a public service. it's literally all so fucking disgusting!!! and here my best friend of, like, 14 years is, playing services every sunday morning and hanging out with the people from the congregation, telling me about how she admires their sense of community. for what? they Commune over feeling they are promised a fate better than all these godless heathens below them. it really makes my blood boil. we fought recently after i told her i couldn't trust and be friends with a christian, or with any believer of an organised religion as a matter of fact, and she got so upset at me for "judging people on the basis of their religion". hello???? of course i judge whether i want someone in my life and whether i can trust them based on their beliefs and worldview and the authorities they willingly choose to follow?????? what is religion if not a worldview, a metaphysically justified one, which makes it that much worse, because that's impossible to argue against. it made me fucking sick, passing by a church yesterday and seeing those masses of people pour out, people who looked entirely average, normal, like the people i'm surrounded by on the daily, like some of my own friends at school, and imagining that those same normal, friendly people i see everyday, who smile at me when i smile at them, then turn around and go there. do this. and here i was trusting them. my mother then congratulated me, saying that i, too, have discovered the great polish two-facedness. they will truly treat you like a friend and then turn around and go to their preachers, to listen obediently how people like you will end up in hell. fucking astounding.

#mine

[romirola]

Headcanons for How the Shaw Pack Members Celebrate Birthdays

David and Angel: David is often torn as to how to approach birthdays. On one hand, he is not a fan of any event that focuses on him. He doesn’t like the idea of people planning anything elaborate for his benefit, buying him gifts, or being any sort of inconvenience. At the same time (even if he won’t explicitly admit it), David very much loves to celebrate others’ birthdays, especially after his father’s passing. Birthday parties are an official marking of time moving forward as he and those he loves grow and change, but still choose to be a part of each other’s lives. He vowed never to take time and togetherness for granted, even if it’s hard for him to show emotion. Although David usually grumbles about inconveniences and struggles to shop for gifts, everyone in the pack realizes just how happy David is during the party. When it comes to Angel’s party, David likes to keep things simple without compromising on quality. Angel’s unempowered friends will usually take them out for a night, and David often lets them do their thing and enjoy themselves independently. To celebrate together, David throws a party that includes the whole pack, featuring Angel’s favorite food and way too many cupcakes. Angel (and everyone else) always has a good time. Angel notices that David can be uncomfortable with the attention that comes along with a birthday party, but they refuse to let the date go by without recognizing it. They know David is not a fan of surprises, so they prefer to keep the party small and always give him ample warning as to when it is going to take place. That helps David let loose a little bit. Even so, David’s phone rings nonstop all day as every pack member and neighboring alpha calls to wish him a happy birthday. The party is pretty informal, usually involving some hanging out, some games, and maybe a movie. Angel orders enough food to feed an army, including a chocolate cake with buttercream frosting (David’s favorite) with a single candle so everyone can sing to him.  

Asher and Babe: Asher loves birthdays and parties of all kinds, including his own. That said, he does not actually care how or when the festivities take place. Asher would be content with anything, as long as his friends, family, and Babe were there to celebrate with him. Babe often collaborates with David and Milo to help plan activities for the party, often adding little personal touches that warm Asher’s heart and show him how invested they are in making Asher happy. Once, they even arranged for three empowered character-actors to portray Kirk, Spock, and McCoy to join the party and spend time with Asher. (Babe vetted them carefully because they knew Asher would ask them questions and expect canonical commitment to the roles. Each actor gave a stellar performance.) When it comes to Babe’s birthday, Asher knows that they often have mixed feelings about the date. Time is precious to Babe, and they often hate to see themselves grow another year older and take stock of where they are in their life professionally. Even though they are in a stellar position for their age and on track to continue progressing, they always feel like they should have done more by now. Their mindset can foster feelings of anxiety or frustration with themselves, not at all the celebratory vibe Asher wants to give them. To offset that anxiety, Asher declares the entire month “Babe’s Extended Birthday” and continually plans an array of activities and surprises Babe with small gifts. Babe is extremely grateful and sometimes, even looks forward to their “birth-month.”

Milo and Sweetheart: While Milo loves a good party and he enjoys hosting the group, he also likes kicking back and relaxing. For that reason, Milo always likes to go out to eat to celebrate his birthday. He always says, “Because it’s my birthday, and if I want coffee with dessert, I don’t want to get up, make everyone coffee, see who wants regular or decaf, get all the mugs, yada-yada-yada. I want to say, “excuse me. Could I get some coffee, please?” Sweetheart is more than happy to oblige. Once Milo tells them where he’d like to go, Sweetheart makes all the arrangements, invites everyone, and ensures that the restaurant will have its servers sing “Happy Birthday” to Milo. They always make sure to give him a special gift with a card signed by them and Aggro. Sweetheart never used to do much for their birthday, at least until they met Milo. Even when they were a child, they never felt comfortable asking for gifts or a party ‘for no reason.’ As an adult, due to their ever-changing work schedule, they usually ended up working on their birthday anyway. All the better for Milo, surprise birthday planner extraordinaire who refuses to tolerate Sweetheart’s tepid response towards their birthday. Because Sweetheart’s actual birthday was usually off-limits for an event, Milo was able to choose a different date to plan a surprise birthday party for Sweetheart. He planned for weeks, even going so far as to wrap and to hide decoy presents in the back of their shared closet (which Sweetheart obviously found and bragged about) when their actual presents were wrapped and safely hidden away at Asher’s apartment. The gifts always include vouchers for a couples massage, given by none other than Aggro. Not only that, but Milo usually ends up staging a surprise party. The party itself changes from year to year (sometimes guests show up to the apartment suddenly with food and presents, sometimes Milo claims he needs to run an errand with Sweetheart and takes them to a restaurant, etc), meaning Sweetheart never knows what to expect and they are always genuinely surprised. Milo is so proud that he is able to find a way to get Sweetheart to enjoy their birthday, and Sweetheart is incredibly grateful to Milo every year. 

Darling and Sam: Due to the circumstances of his turning, Sam struggles greatly to celebrate his death-day. Darling completely understands, so instead, they always celebrate six months after Sam’s death-day, since, according to Vincent, that’s when Sam started to integrate into the Clan and emerge from the initial stage of the bloodlust. They choose that date to celebrate because they can focus on the positive parts of Sam’s turning, including that because he was turned, he found his way into Darling’s life, and they in his. Darling makes sure to block out their whole night so they can spend it with Sam. It usually just takes the shape of a lazy night in, but Sam couldn’t love it more. He doesn’t want or need the trapping of a formal celebration. Instead, they enjoy each other’s company and reflect on all the ways their lives have changed now that they have each other. It took Sam a very long time to learn when Darling’s birthday was. They never told him, so eventually, he had to ask Asher, who has had everyone’s birthdays memorized since he was a kid. Darling never wanted to want a big birthday because they didn’t want to feel disappointed when the day passed unrecognized. Now that they have reintegrated into the pack, everyone always makes sure to wish them a happy birthday, which Darling greatly appreciates, though they still aren’t ready to allow anyone to plan a formal celebration just yet. Sam hopes someday he’ll be able to (since he knows for a fact many Shaw Pack and Solaire Clan members would love to attend), but for now, he follows Darling’s wishes. He still makes sure to spend the day with Darling, brings them their favorite food and usually one modest, practical gift so they have no choice but to accept it, and reminds them how much he loves, respects, and trusts them.

#redacted asmr #redactedverse #redacted david #redacted davey #david shaw #redacted angel #redacted asher #redacted babe #redacted milo #milo greer #redacted sweetheart #redacted darling #redacted darlin #redacted sam #sam collins #redacted shaw pack #redacted headcanons #birthday

[resin-popia]

Hello!! Your Copia doll is coming along beautifully! The paint is so realistic. Like his bottom lip has texture I have no idea how you do it! Your project got me really curious about doll work myself!! 🫣 but I have no idea where to begin. I have a few questions to start out with-

1. Could you summarize the overall process? What are the general steps from start to finish?

2. What general materials do you need?

3. What paint do you use? What brushes/applicators do you use? How did you achieve those softer/blended contour lines, like in skin tone? If that makes sense. I see some others’ projects that you can clearly see paint lines or the texture of the paint they used, but your Copia almost looks airbrushed!! :0

4. How does putting in the hair work?

5. Where do you buy your base doll? And as far as the reveal in the ~bonus picture~, did he come anatomically correct or was that something you had to add? 👀

6. Where do you recommend buying supplies?

Thank you in advance! 🙏 and happy customizing!

Long Post Incoming💀💀💀💀💀

Thanks for all the fantastic questions! Whether you work on playline vinyl dolls like Monster High or Resin Ball Jointed Dolls, the process is the same. The only difference between them is that with the vinyl dolls you are painting the eyes on yourself. Resin Popia has inset glass and resin eyes.

My tag #Resin Popia BTS has all my Behind the Scenes stuff and progress photos.

All the questions answered below the cut!

1. Could you summarize the overall process? What are the general steps from start to finish?

I will be uploading some vids soon. Try this one first tho.

When you do a faceup, it is a collaboration between you and the sculptor. The sculpture does most of the work. You are bringing the deep parts of the sculpture deeper and the forward parts more forward.

Basically this:

photograph and disassemble doll

wash doll pieces with dawn dish soap and warm water. dry all parts I want to paint.

three coats of Mister Super Clear UV Cut (MSC) sealant on each piece, with a 20 min dry time between coats.

deep freckle/blood vessel texture (optional) with red, blue,brown waterey gouache, spray MSC

dark reddish pink chalk pastel pigments in the deep creases/crevices, areas of blood flow. Correct work with kneaded eraser.

after every layer of pigment that I like, I do another spray of MSC.

lighter pinks or tans (based on skin tone references) on things I want to bring forward (brows, nose tip, cheekbones), another pass in the deep areas, new color on the lips. spray seal

Detail with fine lines under eyes, line texture on lips, wrinkles, lower eyelashes. Check references and experiment. A touch of green in the deepest part of the skull on either side of the nose. You know, where you get sinus headaches.

Pray to Satan and cry as I add eyebrows and hair details with gouache. I start by mapping the brows out with dark chalk pastel then do hairstroke lines with gouache. Personally I am super heavy -handed with my brushes, I need to work on that.

When happy, 2 final coats of MSC

Add Vallejo gloss varnish to water lines of eyes and lips.

2. What general materials do you need?

FYI I have been in this hobby for about 7 years. I have only had to replace Mister Super Clear cans and respirator cartidges in that time. Everything else I have used for nearly a decade. And also used them for other projects!

#1 item you need: a proper serious respirator. You will be at risk of inhaling toxic chemicals when you work with sealants or do any sort of dry sanding. Please please please invest in this item.

Mr. Super Clear UV Cut sealant spray. This gives the resin or vinyl a toothy surface to apply pastel pigments, watercolor pencil, and gouache paint on. The techniques will not work without this surface.

The sealant also behaves like skin, which is made up of several layers of matte cells So the pigment you apply to the resin is suspended in layers just like real skin.

Chalk Pastels I like the mungyo hand-rolled chalk pastel just because when you use a razor to scrape off some pigment it crushes up and mixes better. But any chalk pastel will do. The Xanthi video I will link later has a great idea of just buying a few chalks at a time, because to be honest I don't use all of my chalk.

Small nylon brushes.

A fan brush

A tooth brush (for skin texturing/freckles)

Crappy dollar store makeup brushes (for pigment powders)

Kneaded Erasers

White cloth gloves

ceramic dish for a palette

Some people use watercolor pencils, but I never got the hang of them. I prefer just using brushes. Everyone has their own thing they do.

Paint recs in Next Question

3. What paint do you use? What brushes/applicators do you use? How did you achieve those softer/blended contour lines, like in skin tone?

Goache paint dries flat and matte. It's basically opaque watercolor. I use a damp q-tip to remove it if I make a mistake.

Winsor-Newton is great. I am pleasantly surprised by Arteza's gouache. I have used the same gouache tubes for seven years. You put like a raindrop sized bit on a ceramic dish, that's it. And you can reconstitute gouache endlessly with just a little water.

The trick is to never EVER EVER use true black. nothing is true black unless it's makeup. I use gouache paint on Resin Popia's eye makeup but then soften it with black pastel powder to make it richer.

If you use true black it looks like mud or holes. Dark purples, browns, and greens.

Also don't be afraid to be a bit louder with the colors, the sealant mutes them a lot. Just work slowly and take breaks.

4. How does putting in the hair work?

For resin dolls, you need to make a wig. They are a PITA to make, but it's possible! Check out Mozekyto for how to make wigs. (I'll have more recommended videos further down this post.) Vinyl playline dolls you can reroot, but some people prefer wigs.

5. Where do you buy your base doll? And as far as the reveal in the ~bonus picture~, did he come anatomically correct or was that something you had to add? 👀

The same techniques can use used on vinyl dolls like Rainbow High, Monster High etc. You can get them at goodwill, big box stores, and on ebay. Lots of people sell old toy dolls.

Resin Ball Jointed Dolls are a lot more expensive, so I have spent several years slowly building up my collection. I love vinyl and resin dolls equally.

I bought my base doll from Alice Collections acbjd.com they are a vendor of many resin dolls. I absolutely love Resinsoul.

My favorite doll companies (find them on Alice Collections!) are IslandDoll, Resinsoul, Dollmore, MyouDoll, DollLeaves, 5StarDoll.

Resin Popia is MSD "Mini Super Dollfie" size aka 40cm-52cm. He's 52 cm. SD (Super Dollfie) is around 60-65cm.

I have owned dolls that were considered "prestige artist dolls" in the past, but I always end up selling them because they are so precious I'm afraid to ruin them so they just become dollar signs to me instead of something I love. I'd say $300 would get you a gorgeous resin doll and some clothes for them. Saving up for a doll you really really love is worth it in the end. People also sell used dolls on Instagram. Just please make sure to check the COAs.....

Important Note: I am a Pro-Artist legit BJD collector. AliExpress, Etsy, and Ebay have bootleg dolls that yes, are significantly cheaper, but that is because they steal from the artists that did 99% of the work (and spent tons of their own money) to develop the doll's appearance and engineering. If one cares about supporting artists they should consider the ramifications of purchasing these recasts and propagating the bootleggers. (Especially since a large part of the artist BJD community is from Russia and Ukraine, who have been lately hard hit by war and YET are still making beautiful art for the world to enjoy) I am not pro-bullying though, I am Pro-Education so if anyone wants to have a private, frank conversation about recasts in the BJD hobby feel free to message me.

One silly thing that happened once was I purchased a legit IslandDoll Bru (IslandDoll is always on sale TBH) that was actually cheaper than its recast on ebay. There are a lot of sales during Chinese holidays (11/11, Lunar New Year, Fall Festival) and you usually get a lot of extras like free eyes, beautiful carrying cases, incredible boxes, etc. Resinsoul, the "cheap" BJD company often gives you a gorgeous carrying case for your doll.

Ok enough with the disclaimers now onto doll d!cks haha

Resin dolls are usually realistic when it comes to parts. Realistic in the fact that they add something there...something simple but it's there. Resin Popia has option parts made of silicone that are actually from an action figure company called TB League. Look up "TB League Option Parts" on Ebay. The figures are 1/6 scale making the parts scary and massive at 1/6 scale but funnily enough they make sense at 1/4 scale.

IDK why i got em, I just wanted to have some fun with this doll.

6. Where do you recommend buying supplies?

If you can get to a local hobbyshop that sells models (like miniatures and wargaming figures) please support them first! As vital spaces for geek culture they need all of our support. You can get tiny brushes, Model Paints and sometimes even the sealant from them. Just call ahead they can work something out for you!

Chalk Pastels, Gouache paints I get from art supply stores and as a last resort, Amazon. I use these supplies in other art projects and you will quickly get addicted to gouache painting, i'm sure of it!

Great Videos/Resources

Xanthi's Minimalist Supply List

Xanthi's Male Realistic Faceup (I watch this one so much)

Youtube Channels I like: Enchanterium, Dollymotion, Dollightful, Lomi's Playground, Xanthi

This Book is Great: How to Rock at BJD Faceups

I am answering your additional questions in the comments if you have any! I am @anamelessfool

#bjd copia #toy customization #dollblr #doll customization #bjd tutorial #bjd faceup #q&a #legit bjd #resin popia bts

[jewish-vents]

Unsure if convert messages are accepted but here goes- feel free to delete. Even just thinking about writing this up helped but I still feel like I'm drowning. I'm a convert in progress, but had to move to a certain anti-trans state just as I started reaching out to a rabbi. I thought I would be where I am for a short time but now I've been here for almost a year and a half and I don't see a way out in the near future. Part of me wants to just start again with the community here but with everything going on I don't know if I would intrude and with the holiday season coming up I know it's prudent to wait until after. And yet. Without support, even though I know that conversion is what I want (I have been thinking and reading about Judaism for the purposes of considering conversion for over three years, though I am still not as well read as I would like) and my own ADHD/shortcomings I feel so far behind where I need to be and I have so few friends in my life. My long distance partner is also supportive of my conversion, but last time I visited them, they told me one of their friends was really involved in the "Free Palestine" movement, "but don't worry, she is not antisemitic!" Well that friend proceded to make jokes about a "Zionist conspiracy to kill antizionists" based on her choking on a sandwich at a Jewish deli with an "I stand with Israel" sign. My partner was horrified but I'm far more concerned with the idea that my partner had no idea she would make a joke like that. I love my partner, and my partner does have Jewish friends in their life and professional circles, and my partner does care about antisemitism but how could my partner misjudge her so badly? Especially since they're both on Twitter and I'm not so I can't just scroll through to see if there's other red flags I'm missing. All this to say I guess that I think I'm going to reach out to a local synagogue once Purim has passed and I don't want to be stuck forever.

Anon, I'm so sorry you're dealing with this. I can tell you that you won't be in any way intruding. If you are converting, them you are becoming part of the Jewish community, and you deserve a place as much as anyone does.

In fact, I would encourage you not to wait. The Rabbi may tell you that they are too busy to work with you until after Purim, but, as one person with ADHD to another, just knowing that you have taken the concrete action of reaching out can make a big difference in terms of your mental health.

#jewish vents #antisemitism #jewish convert #mod s

[missvelvetsstuff]

Where You Goin, Star?

Bucky Barnes x Reader

BikerAU

Summary: Reader meets Bucky when the truck hauling her show horses breaks down as she is trying to leave for an event and he works for the mechanic. Passionate, secret love affair ensues. After a confrontation with her father, Bucky decides she deserves better than a poor biker like him and leaves town with his friends Steve and Sam.

Three years later, reader is trapped in an abusive relationship and about to give up hope of things ever improving, when Bucky comes back.

Chapter 15

Warnings: swearing, angst

The rest of the week flew by as Star spent hours preparing for the upcoming trial and working with business associates to manage her businesses. The Saturday night before the trial started Bucky planned a quiet and relaxing evening in for just the two of them.

Since they were still sticking close to Stark tower, for safety reasons until the trial was over, he asked Pepper for help and planned a picnic in Y/N's room. Pepper called Y/N to shop at her place and they spent hours looking at clothes, debating styles, fabrics and colors.

It was after 6pm when Y/N realized how much time had passed "Damn Pep, why didn't you tell me it was getting so late? I was supposed to meet Bucky 20 minutes ago."  She grabbed her phone, surprised that there were no messages.

Pepper looked at her knowingly "How are things going with you two? Anything steamy to gossip about?"

Y/N felt her face heat up and shook her head "No, nothing like that. He's just been very supportive and protective. A good friend."

Pepper looked at her sympathetically "I understand why you are being careful but that man is crazy about you. It's written all over his face. Yours too. Taking it slow is smart but don't let John or your fathers words throw you off track. They were hate filled bastards so don't let them ruin what you have."

Y/N wiped a tear off of her face, still overwhelmed at any kindness offered to her "Thank you, Pepper. You don't know how much your and Tony's friendship and support has meant to me. I really had given up on the idea of people helping others for the sake of helping, without any conditions or expectations." She hugged Pepper quickly "We'll finish this shopping later." And bolted out of the apartment and to her own.

The door was unlocked so she knew Bucky was already there but she wasn't expecting her rooms to be turned into a fairy tale. There were twinkle lights everywhere and a few candles, which made the room glow softly and left a hint of vanilla behind. Mellow jazz was playing softly.

Bucky looked up at her and smiled nervously, hoping that she liked it, that he wasn't moving too fast. The smile on her face encouraged him.

"Welcome home, Star. I have supper ready if you're hungry. Have a seat on the pillows in there and I'll bring everything out."

When they were settled in Bucky's nest, eating dinner he told her about his day at the motorcycle shop, the custom bike he was working on for a client. The customer who had a fit about paying the already agreed upon charges and how a 10% discount shut him up.

Star told him about the progress she was making sorting through her father's business mess, deciding the fate of each individual business and property. And about shopping with Pepper.

Bucky smiled at how she was slowly coming back to the woman he had fallen in love with. Like every layer of her father and John that she pulled back and let go of revealed more of the woman she was meant to be.

They picked out a silly movie to watch and cuddled up closely, Star on his lap, his arms holding her steady. At one point she laughed so hard she pulled away from Bucky and he took the opportunity to look at her in the soft lighting. He was still amazed, every day, that she was here with him, that they might have another chance to be together.

When her laughing calmed down, Star noticed him looking at her.

"What? Do I have something on my face?" She looked down as she felt her face heat up but Bucky gently grabbed her chin and pulled her up to look at him.

He shook his head "No, your face is beautiful. I'm just, I don't know, I'm still in awe and a bit of disbelief that you're here. With me. My Star is here and I'm expecting to wake up from this dream, like I have so many times in the last 3 years." He lowered his voice to a whisper and looked at her with tears in his eyes "Please don't be a dream."

She leaned into him and her lips brushed his so softly he almost couldn't feel it. He kissed her back, thrilling at the feel of her. She deepened the kiss, his mouth sweet and not aggressive like she was used to, when she was kissed at all. His tongue softly traced along the seam of her lips, he wanted her more than he could describe but didn't want to push her. She accepted his tongue and they danced until they both needed air.

Bucky slowly and softly traced his hands down her back, pulling her closer. Star moaned into his mouth, desperate for real affection instead of the way she had been used over the years.

When she felt his hardness pushed up against her, something in Star snapped and she was back in John's bed, she tried to breathe, remind herself that this wasn't him, that sex could feel good for her. She really tried but couldn't stop the images, the feelings and she froze.

Bucky felt her freeze and quickly pulled back to see her eyes were glazed over but before he could say anything she did.

"No, stop. I, nonono, John please. I can't, please" she pushed him away.

Bucky tried to soothe her but she was deep in a memory, thrashing in his arms with tears streaming down her face. "Please John, it hurts. Brock hurt me. Stop. Please."

Bucky relaxed His hold, hoping to keep her from hurting herself and rocking gently, whispering words of love and encouragement. His heart ached for her but he also felt rage over what they had done to his sweet Star. He would kill both of them with his bare hands if he could.

They sat like this for a few minutes until she calmed down, his voice bringing her back to reality.

When she realized what happened she pulled away from him, afraid to look him in the eyes and trying not to cry "I'm so sorry Jamie, it just felt like it took over my brain and felt so real." She glanced up at his face and caught his eyes. They were warm blue, like a tropical sea, and full of concern.

He hesitantly reached out to caress her cheek. She tensed a little but his touch was so warm and safe, he smelled so good. It felt like home and she relaxed, leaning into his hand.

Bucky shook his head "No, Star, don't be sorry. What they did to you was not your fault and forced you to live for survival. Now you will be able to really live but it's gonna take time to relearn." He kissed her forehead "I'll be here for you every step, however you need me."

Star looked at him sadly "I don't know if I can be that woman anymore, Jamie. Even if I find a way to heal, I have lived with the darker side of people for years. I'll never be able to unsee or forget everything."

Bucky smiled sadly "I know, doll. That kind of shit sticks with you. I had some troubles after we came home from Afghanistan. It still fucks me up sometimes but I learned how to live with it. And with myself."

He carefully pulled her back into his arms "You will too, your therapist will help and I'll be here."

Star shook her head and took a deep breath, afraid to say what she felt she had to say to him, in case he...

"Jamie." She said it so firmly that he pulled back to look in her eyes. Her insides fluttered.

"I, uh I don't want you to stay and help me if it's just out of guilt or some sense of obligation. I've already forgiven you and I um..." Her brain froze and her mouth stumbled over the whispered words. "I still love you and want to be with you." She took a breath to steady herself and cleared her throat "But I'm broken, don't know if I'll ever be ok again.

She looked down, unable to face his rejection.

Bucky felt his heart swelling, love for her filling every part of him. "Y/N, my sweet, perfect, shining Star. You are all I want. All I've wanted since the day we met and I will wait as long as you need me to. I'm not going anywhere if I have any say over the matter."

She looked up at him with wide eyes "But why? How can you...still want me? I'm broken. Used. How could you want someone like me?"

"Oh doll, everyone is broken in one way or another. I told you some of the stories from my time in the military or growing up with my POS father. Did you know you were part of my healing? All the shit with my dad, what he did to my mom the rare times he showed up. I didn't know relationships could be like ours. What we had and will find again. Just don't give up on me, on us. Please. Our love is too precious to let go of."

Star saw the love in his eyes and pushed past her fear to let herself trust in it, in him, in them.

"It's getting late sweetheart, lets get some rest." He picked her up and carried her to her bed before stripping to his briefs and pulling her into his arms.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next morning, Friday woke them up to have brunch with Tony, Pepper and baby Morgan. They had a fun brunch with a couple of drag queens that Pepper knew, listening to show tunes and playing trivia. When they were finished eating, Tony took Bucky to his lab to show him some ideas he had for motorcycle upgrades and Pepper took Y/N to her wardrobe where they indulged in massages, facials and mani/pedi plus champagne and edibles. Pepper hoped to keep Star distracted about the trial starting the next day.

Star was nervous, John and Olivia had been bad mouthing her to anyone who would listen, claiming that Y/N had been the mastermind behind everything that had happened from forcing John to end his relationship with Olivia so she could marry him, to having Sharon end her father.

She knew the evidence supported her version but she had been unceremoniously dumped by a couple of charities that she was involved with and some who backed her therapeutic stable pulled their funding. She could afford to pay for the stables operations but then learned some of the parents pulled riders from her lessons and it broke her heart. All she could do was tell her truth and hope people would come back when they learned what actually happened.

Pepper tried to console her "You know how people can be, over cautious, but the truth will come out and they will come back."

Star nodded in understanding "I know, it's just such bullshit. I haven't even been involved in that program since I married John."

Star had a light dinner with Pepper before having a glass of wine and an edibla with Bucky. They curled up together for a restless nights sleep, visions of worst case scenarios waking her up repeatedly until she gave up and climbed up to the garden on the roof to watch the sun rise.

@pattiemac1 @hhiggs

Chapter 16

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fanfiction #james bucky barnes x reader #james bucky barnes #bucky barnes x you #angst with a happy ending #biker au

[sqewed0722]

Till The End of The Moon

Currently watching this CDrama starring Luo Yunxi and Bai Lu and I must say I have found my latest crack drama.

I don’t really know what makes this different from other CDrama/wuxias I’ve attempted to watch in the past. All I know is that I’ve been watching at least 3 episodes everyday since I started it.

Briefly, Luo Yunxi is the Devil God who intends to destroy all immortals in all the three realms (which I would presume refers to the immortals, the demons and the mortal humans) and four continents and become the most powerful being in the universe. The immortal sects try to stop him but are unable to. Their last hope is to send Li SuSu (played by Bai Lu), the daughter of one of the sect leaders, 500 years back in time to confront the Devil God when he was just a mortal prince named Tantai Jin, whose “demon bone” (at least that’s what they call it) has not yet awakened, and stop him from turning evil.

Yet it turns out to be more complex than that, as Li SuSu finds herself confronting the Devil God across time and space, in all their different incarnations. Only by going through their previous lives and encounters can she understand and find the way to defeat him.

The drama’s plot is as complex and convoluted as CDramas go, and there are so many minor characters that pop out seemingly without any purpose, only for you to find their characters reappear within another sub-arc, which eventually ties them to the main arc. It’s a bit of a challenge to keep up with all of them. And then there are those illogical or contradictory scenes and plot devices that make you scratch your head and ask yourself how that would work out. A good example would be those instances that Li SuSu, in her mortal guise as Ye Xiwu, is able to summon the power of the Chongyu Harp that she wielded as an immortal, when she clearly stated early on after she went back in time that she can’t use its power as a mortal woman. And then there are many times that, as Ye Xiwu, she travels on foot alone for long distances and she doesn’t seem to get tired at all, even though she has no provisions. There was that scene too when she was trying to treat the poison that Tantai Jin had been shot with in his eye. They were running from his brother’s soldiers and hiding in the forest, with only the clothes they’re wearing. Tantai Jin passes out and Ye Xiwu decides to treat him with some herbs. When he regains consciousness, he sees Ye Xiwu pounding on herb leaves using a mortar and pestle which, for the life of me, I don’t know how she managed to obtain in the middle of a forest. And don’t get me started on how she forced a female demon named Pianran to lead her to the Barren Abyss and how she managed to travel great distances with a demon to get there, and then going down into it as a mortal without getting killed.

Dramas like these require a lot of patience and suspended disbelief. One has to go into it expecting to just sit back and enjoy, and not to apply critical thinking. It’s not a mathematical problem to be solved anyway.

In any case, I’m enjoying it so far and look forward to each episode. I’ve become very curious as to why Tantai Jin had the demon bone when he was born and the ultimate reason why he and Li SuSu seem destined to meet in all their different lifetimes. I also love the lavish costumes and the intricate details that go into each attire.

Bai Lu is so beautiful dressed in her flowing diaphanous silks, with all those hair ornaments on top of her head, and her dark hair made to look really long and falling down past her waist. (To be honest, I didn’t quite find her pretty when I first saw her in ep 1. I even thought she looked a bit mature, but as the drama progressed she became very beautiful in my eyes.) She has an impish and childlike quality about her, yet you can sense her earnestness and grim determination as Li SuSu.

Luo Yunxi seems a tad thin, which makes his face look long and his cheeks hollow. But this was probably required of the role, since the Devil God is supposed to have a cold, cunning and ruthless look to him. And as the mortal prince Tantai Jin, he was supposed to look undernourished and unhealthy and suspicious, as he was a hostage of the Crown and treated little better than a slave. But his eyes are compelling when they look at you and as you look at him longer, you start to see a haunting sort of beauty in his features.

I’m already on Episode 12 and I think this drama has 40 episodes. It’s getting more interesting as the story progresses so I’ll just enjoy it. Doesn’t hurt that Luo Yunxi and Bai Lu have great chemistry together. 🙂

#cdrama #till the end of the moon #luo yunxi #bai lu #tantai jin #ye xiwu

[sleptwithinthesun]

quick disclaimer before i get into the fic, if you'll bear with me. i have tourette's syndrome, and was diagnosed about a year and a half ago. i've had TS since before i was fifteen, and now have over six years of experience with it. it is a normal and daily aspect of my life. this fic and possible subsequent ones, depending on the reception it gets, are not meant to be representative of every person's experience with TS. it is based on mine because that is what i can attest to. if you have any questions at all, i'm very open to talking about it, and you can absolutely send an ask :)

now that that's over...

3.3K of r/obert c/hase with tourette's syndrome from h/ouse m/d (yes, people with TS can be surgeons). set in season one before vogler arrives because chase is also less of a dick then. no snz yet, just because i want to introduce the condition first. i really hope that you enjoy because i'm super excited to post this :D

It hurts not to tic.

Chase hates to admit it, but it really does. He's tried explaining the premonitory urge to people in the past, likening the feeling to a building sense of pressure, and usually sudden enough for him that it's almost like a shock. Not awful, but enough to make you flinch at the sensation. If he doesn't tic, the feeling just builds and builds until it hurts, and he has no option but to let them out.

On some days, though, it's not quite that mild.

Today, for instance, he feels like someone's put a live wire underneath his skin, like electricity is beginning to spark through his body, like he's out of his damn mind because for some reason, the feeling of wrongness in his neck and shoulders won't go away until his neck jerks to the side and his shoulders tense upwards and lock in place, hard enough that he's shaking, for a good ten seconds. His breath forces itself out in choppy exhales through his nose, getting progressively shallower as more time passes without an inhale. Chase is more than aware, even with his eyes squeezed shut, that House is side-eyeing him while scrawling out the list of their patient's symptoms, and that Cameron, seated behind him, is going to pull him aside for a few moments once they're done here. He's done this song and dance so many times, and it's exhausting.

House finally puts the marker down just as Chase's shoulders drop and he does his best to inhale quietly, his head jerking over to the right a few times as House gives him a look that Chase knows means keep it together. Then, he limps a step back to stare at the list of symptoms along with the rest of them. Fever, swollen lymph nodes, migraines, sore throat, seizure.

"It's way too general," Foreman says, breaking the silence.

"How do you explain the seizure?" Cameron challenges.

Chase juts his chin forward twice in another tic. Foreman shrugs. "Her fever got too high. Febrile seizure."

"It's something else," House says, without detracting his gaze from the board in front of them. He's tapping the marker against his arm. "Try again."

Cameron sighs. "I mean, it could just be a case of encephalitis. Explains the flu-like symptoms and the seizure."

House shakes his head again, finally turning to look back at them. "She'd be more disoriented, first off, and her friends haven't reported any personality changes." His gaze slides to Chase, and he frowns. "You've been awfully quiet. Any ideas?"

"She's immunocompromised," Chase states, and his head jerks again when House nods exaggeratedly, obviously unimpressed. He blinks, hard. “And, uh, she's what? Twenty? Twenty-one?"

"Twenty-three," Cameron provides.

He gives her a short nod of gratitude. "It could be mononucleosis. Foreman's probably right about the seizure, given her condition, but that only takes one symptom off the list. The rest points to anything similar to the flu, and, well, there's a hundred diseases that could be. Do we know if she's dating?"

"Boyfriend. He's out of town, though; her friend who brought her in said so," says Foreman.

Chase nods again. "We can put her through a CT scan, see if either her liver or spleen are swollen."

"It's a start," House murmurs, then nods, standing. "Alright. I'll put in the order; you three start treating her. I've got clinic duty." With that, he swings his cane around in front of him and limps off through the hospital hallways.

The second he's finally out of earshot, Chase lets out a loud hum, two-tone, high to low. The tic repeats a few times, all the worse for trying to suppress it, before it calms down and his shoulders tense for only a brief moment. When he looks back up at Cameron and Foreman, they're both wearing identical looks of veiled concern.

"I'm fine," he reassures, and it's immediately offset by yet another jerk of his head and a firm set of blinks. "Really. I'm okay."

"Are you sure about that?" Foreman asks, raising an eyebrow with heavy skepticism. "This is the most I've seen you tic in the four weeks I've been here."

Chase rolls his eyes, jutting his chin forward. "Yeah, and?" 

"Is this going to affect your ability to do your job?"

"Foreman, hey—" Cameron starts to warn. 

Chase's head whips in his direction, half a tic and half out of anger. "Excuse me?"

Foreman meets him with a cool gaze, unflinching. "Your job, Chase. Are you still capable of—"

"I heard you perfectly fine the first time," Chase growls, low and irate. His shoulders tic sharply up to his ears, and he willfully ignores the pointed look Foreman gives. "I've been here longer than you have. Believe me, if I was incapable, I wouldn't even be a passing thought in your mind."

"Then why are you so afraid to tic in front of House?" he demands. 

"I'm sorry, would you be eager to twitch around like an imbecile?" Chase snaps. His elbow jerks backward; the rising tension's making his tics worse, triggering the bigger, more complex ones. "I'm sure you're just so damn excited to watch me have a tic attack."

"Everything I know about Tourette's says that you're not supposed to suppress your tics."

"Oh, yeah, just lecture me about my own disorder, why don't you."

"I'm the neurologist here!"

"And I'm the one who's had Tourette's for the past twelve years." Chase glares at Foreman, valiantly ignoring the way his neck jerks sharply to the side once again. At least, until it doesn't stop. 

Cameron's hands press down on his shoulders, guiding him into a chair as his head snaps to the right over and over and over again. "Chase," she says quietly. She's done this a few times before; Chase prefers to ride it out alone, but sometimes, a grounding presence becomes necessary and Cameron's never had any qualms about it.

"I-I-I'm f-fine," he manages, eyes squeezed shut, voice stuttering with every sharp twist of his neck. "Gi-ive it a minute."

Both Foreman and Cameron are quiet aside from the shuffling and gathering of papers while he rides out the loop, jerking his head violently enough at one point that his neck cracks. It's immediately followed by the heel of his palm coming up to press against the bottom of his chin, forcing him to look up at the ceiling for a long handful of seconds until his hand drops back to his side.

"I tic in front of House," Chase murmurs, once the irrepressible urge to tic finally dissipates. "But I'm not going to interrupt him with a vocal tic if I can hold it back until he's done talking. Our jobs are the one thing standing between our patients and death. What we do every day, that matters. My Tourette's cannot get in the way of that."

Before Foreman can say anything else, a nurse throws the door open. "Your patient's just had a seizure," he says, face grim. "Grand mal."

Cameron sighs, gathering her supplies together, changing topics easily. "Let's rule out mono, then."

-

He makes it to just past two in the afternoon before the exhaustion actually slams into him. Foreman's statement earlier was true; while he's not having a bad tic day, per se, he can still admit it when they're worse than usual. He can't even make it through a full minute without ticcing in some regard, whether they're motor or vocal, and frankly, it's tiring to jerk his limbs around for the entire day. His neck is sore, his shoulders ache, and his eyes hurt from the amount of pressure his blinking tics puts on them, not to mention the constant buzz in his throat that threatens to interrupt him if he talks. 

More than anything, Chase just wants to go home and sleep.

He glances up from the centrifuge when Cameron walks in with yet another blood sample in hand, aiming for the microscope. The door shuts quietly behind her, and she waits until she's pressed a drop of blood in between two slides to say, "Hey."

"Hello," Chase replies, and carefully opens the centrifuge after the light turns green. He pulls the first of the vials with their patient's blood sample out of the chamber, then examines it with a critical eye.

"You find anything?"

He sighs, head jerking before he places it back down in the rack on the table. "Both her plasma and her blood cell level seem normal. What're you checking for, antibodies?"

"Yep," Cameron says, unconsciously popping the 'p'. Chase mimics it as a phonic tic, shoulders hunching forward just as Cameron looks back to him, sympathy on her face. "It hasn't calmed down at all?" she asks, brows furrowed.

"No, it has, just, you know," he says, shrugging, "echopraxia. I think." He makes a face; phonic tics aren't technically motor or vocal, and Chase's mimicry doesn't exactly categorize into either being echopraxia or echolalila.

"Have you been able to talk with Foreman about it?"

"I don't plan on it."

Cameron stares at him. "What do you mean?"

"I don't want to talk to him about it. It's simple," he says, taking out another vial. Same result; both the plasma and blood cell levels appear completely normal.

"You kind of have to talk to him about it, though," she says, ever the pragmatist, "if he's going to continue to bother you about your ability to do your job. You've spoken to him about it once before, right? Surely, it's not that hard to do it again?"

Chase glances up at her. "House was the one to tell him I have Tourette's. I didn't have that discussion with him."

The heavy sigh Cameron gives is audible, even from Chase's position all the way across the room. "Chase," she says, disappointment lacing her tone.

"What?"

"You have to talk to him, or else he's going to keep questioning you."

Then, it's Chase's turn to sigh. "Cameron, do you want to know just how many times I've dealt with people who've doubted my ability to perform as a doctor?"

"...Not really."

"Exactly. What I'm saying is, people like Foreman? He's not going to believe me if I just tell him I can do my job. Today, and every day onward, I have to actually do my job and do it just as well as he does, if not even better," Chase says. "That's just how it is."

Cameron frowns. "That's not fair to you."

"Well, most things rarely are." The first shrug he gives is on purpose, and the second, more violent, is a tic. "I'm used to it. People like to focus on the one reason they consider me incompetent rather than the many reasons that I'm not. It’s just a fact of life. Nearly everyone I've ever learned, trained, or worked alongside has doubted me in some capacity. I've learned not to take it personally."

The expression on Cameron's face is indecipherable. Chase doesn't bother trying, though, just disposes of the samples and walks out of the lab. They have bigger and more important things to deal with than Foreman's issues with him.

"Chase, wait!" Cameron's shout makes him tic, an elbow jerking back and narrowly missing a passing nurse, who glares at him. He tries to give an apologetic smile, but the nurse just scoffs and keeps walking, clipboard tucked under their arm. His opposite shoulder jerks inward twice as they walk away, and he sighs before turning back to Cameron, who's just now caught up to him.

"You didn't leave that blood sample in the rack uncovered, did you?" he asks. "If so, that's a violation of the sanitary codes."

She ignores him. "Have you ever thought of the fact that people might stop doubting you if you actually talked to them?"

"Did you listen to a single word I just said? Evidently not; you're j-ust like the rest of them."

"Chase."

"Cameron."

"Just talk to Foreman," she says. "It doesn’t have to be a lot, but just talk to him. At the very least, give him a chance."

"Why should I?"

"You said it yourself, House was the one to tell him about your Tourette's," Cameron points out. At Chase's raised eyebrow, she rolls her eyes. "What? I listen. The point is, Foreman hasn't heard anything directly from you, and knowing House, the only thing he said to him was 'one of your new coworkers has Tourette's Syndrome' and nothing else."

"How do you know that?"

"What do you think he told me?"

Cameron's wry smile gives him pause. "Was that all he said to you?"

"Yep." She doesn't pop the 'p' this time.

"Did you press him for more details?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"It seemed like an invasion of privacy."

"Nobody doesn't want to ask questions."

"Of course not," Cameron agrees. "I had questions. I just waited to ask them until the situation was appropriate. I really didn't want your first impression of me to be the asshole who asked if you curse all the time."

"Yeah. I appreciated that."

"You're welcome. Still, Chase, I've asked you plenty of questions since I started working here, and I'd like to think that you're the most open with your tics around me. Or... Wilson, maybe, but from our team? You do trust me more than House, right?"

He thinks for a moment. It's true; Cameron is the one who knows how to properly deal with his tics if they're overwhelming him, despite the fact that he's worked with House longer. The elder doctor doesn't acknowledge them much, just makes jabs occasionally or takes offense on Chase's behalf. Which, on one hand, doesn't make them worse, but on the other, always makes Chase feel just a bit more awkward when interacting with him. Cameron doesn't ever go far enough as to respond to his vocal tics the way Wilson does, but she'll ask if he's okay after a particularly violent motor tic or give him a few extra moments to gather himself in conversation.

Chase has to admit it. "Yes."

"Trust me on this, then. You can clear a lot of things up if you just talk to him," she says, then starts to walk away. Halfway to the lab, she pauses, and turns back toward him. "Chase?"

"Yes?"

"In the five minutes we've been taking, how many times did you tic?"

"I don't know," he says, dubious. "Five, six, maybe?"

She smiles. "They've calmed down a bit, at least."

It's the little moments like that one that really get him to appreciate Cameron. Of course, he immediately ruins it by ticcing and smacking the bottom of his chin with the heel of his palm, but he'll take the small victories. Five minutes of minimal ticcing is better than none.

-

"Toxoplasmosis?"

"It fits. And better than anything else we've come up with."

"But toxoplasmosis?" Foreman repeats, incredulous. "Are you sure?"

"He's right," House says, limping over to the board. "Toxoplasmosis covers every symptom displayed." He erases their previous diagnosis, then scrawls out TOXOPLASMOSIS at the top before nodding at Chase to continue.

"She's immunocompromised," Chase explains as his left elbow jerks idly backward. "It's very possible that she's one of the few cases that actually presents with symptoms. Especially considering how perfectly said symptoms fit her illness."

Foreman nods. "Alright."

"Give her a combination of pyrimethamine and sulfadiazine, along with leucovorin," House instructs. "If that doesn't work, and it should, switch her over to sulfamethoxazole-trimethoprim but keep the leucovorin. Cameron, go tell her friend that she's going to be fine."

"On it," Cameron says, heading out of the room. As she does, she locks eyes with Chase and cants her head toward Foreman, then pushes the door open and leaves.

Foreman looks over to him, brows furrowed. "What was that about?"

Chase sighs. "I'll explain after we treat the patient."

"Alright," Foreman says, obvious in his suspicion.

Nevertheless, he leads the way over to the pharmacy, gives half of the medication to Chase, and then follows the younger up to their patient's room. "Kayla, how're you doing?"

The woman smiles tiredly up at him. Her red hair is splayed out wide across the pillow, her hands resting on top of the blanket on her lap. "I'm okay," she says, propping herself up on her right elbow. "My head still hurts, though. Could you maybe give me something for that?"

"Even better," Chase says, holding up his vial of leucovorin for Kayla to see. "We've got your treatment." His opposite shoulder tenses up only slightly, not enough for Foreman to notice. Kayla, however, does, judging by the sudden crease in her brow. She doesn't press, thankfully, and Chase's face screws up in a momentary grimace before he moves over to the drawer to pull out a drip.

It's not like their patients haven't known about it before. Hell, Chase nearly had a tic attack in a patient's room after they kept purposefully triggering his tics, despite the instructions not to and House's increasingly angry glares whenever they did so. Needless to say, Cuddy hadn't protested when House requested to transfer them to another doctor when the guy just wouldn't stop.

They set her up on the drips and give her a shot of morphine for the residual pain, and leave with the promise to check up on her in a couple of hours, as well as a probably release tomorrow, once they get the medication in pill form.

And then, Foreman drags him out of the room and into the hallway, asking, "So, that exchange with Cameron?" as they walk back toward their room.

Chase sighs, nodding. He opens his mouth to speak, and—

—nothing.

Awkward, uncomfortable silence lies stagnant between them, and Foreman only stares at Chase as he tries to gather his thoughts enough to actually say what he needs to say, doing his best not to tic and ruin the seriousness of the moment.

"We need to talk," he eventually blurts. "About my Tourette's."

Foreman sighs. "Look, Chase, I'm sorry if anything that I said earlier upset you—"

"I should have phrased that differently," he interrupts. "I need to talk. You need to listen to me, even if only for a moment." Chase, determined, sets his jaw and meets Foreman's surprised gaze.

"Okay," he concedes, shockingly easily.

Chase nods, once, sharp and curt. "You don't get to lecture me about my disorder," he starts. "You just don't. I honestly don't give a damn that you're a neurologist; my Tourette's is not something you're entitled to comment on just because it's come up in your studies. You have to earn that privilege.

"I get that you're new. I get that sometimes, it's hard to believe me what I say that I am more than capable of doing by job, but you need to believe me when I say I know my limits. I am not going to do something just to prove a point, just to say that a person with Tourette's can do it. If it is unsafe for me to do something, I will ask someone else to do it. Cameron and House can both attest to that.

"If you trust me, then I will trust you back, and I will go to you in case I need a moment or someone to fill in for me. If not, then we might waste valuable time while I find someone else who I am comfortable enough with to speak to. Alright?"

Foreman stares at him, eyes wide, incredulous. Maybe it's because Chase has never been so candid on the matter, or maybe because this was not the conversation he was expecting to have. Regardless, he nods, almost dumbfounded.

"Good. I'm glad that's clear," Chase says, then walks off, white coat swishing behind him. He hums, the same tic as earlier in the day, and smiles faintly to himself.

#h/ouse m/d whumpfic #whumpfic #h/ouse m/d #r/obert c/hase #a/llison c/ameron #e/ric f/oreman #g/regory h/ouse #t/ourette's au #swts fic

[canichangemyblogname]

It’s so fucking wild how weird people act about not voting for incumbents. Y’all gotta stop uncritically calling people fascist for not voting for incumbents. Try voting for the candidate based in what they do for you rather than blind party loyalty.

An Example:

My local state rep is a dem. She has a 100% score from Personal PAC and the Illinois Environmental Council. She also has an F rating from the NRA and an A rating from the Humane Society. She also has an A/100% from the Institute on Public Policy for People with Disabilities. I like what she does. I like the bills she supports and has introduced. I like the way I ALWAYS see her in the community. I like how she makes an effort to reach out. I will vote for her. Why? Because I like what she does.

I do not, however, like my local mayor/president. I think he’s a tool. He doesn’t want to build affordable housing in the area because he doesn’t want “Chicago riff-raff” in his town (hi 👋, I’m riff-raff). He passed an ordinance that made it illegal/fineable to run a business out of your home just to spite his neighbor. He doesn’t want to bring more businesses into our town/neighborhood because he essentially wants to turn it into one large single family housing development. He’s been actively driving business out of town. I dislike him very much. I have never voted for him.

Every year, he runs unopposed and scrapes by with just barely enough % of votes to qualify. And every year the community tries to run someone against him and they just can’t outspend him. Nor can the candidate keep up (like… a school teacher or SAHM will try to run or something and just face too many barriers to entry).

Yet… no one talks about the implications of wide-spread uncontested elections for democracy. Upwards of 70% of races go uncontested in the US. It’s as serious an issue as a lack of voter engagement. And no one really talks about this because no one wants to admit that the US is only a democracy on paper (if that). Without choice, true choice, you do not have a democracy, and most districts lack choice and true choice (think: gerrymandering and its illusion of choice).

Every year I abstain. And he scrapes by with— like— just over that threshold % of the vote. However, when I have mentioned this on the internet (TikTok, Twitter, FB), some chronically online fool will invariably accuse me of supporting fascism by abstaining. And that makes ZERO sense.

Another Example:

I also am not a big fan of my congress member. He’s taken $$ from Islamophobic nationalist groups. (Yes, he’s a democrat.) He did not oppose a rail merger that is now bringing 5 mi long oil freights straight through the middle of my town, right along our river (which is also our drinking water). I never see him in the community, except parades. The only thing he’s done that I support is bring $$ into the district to clean up our waterways (ironic, I know). But the thing is? Nearly any politician can do that for you, if you lobby and press them with a large and varied coalition. He’s not special for getting us money when he can be replaced and we can get some other dude to give us money instead. He’s not special. He’s just an incumbent.

But when I tell people I vote 3rd party (if and when available) for that race because he always wins his primary (usually uncontested) and there’s no way I’m voting for a Republican, people cannot be normal about it. They act like I voted for the reactionary and right-wing Republican candidate rather than actively voting for the candidate of my choice and a passively non-voting for neither the Dem or the Repub.

“But if the third party splits enough of the progressive vote, the Republican is bound to win.”

A third party progressive vote isn’t splitting the progressive vote. The progressives and socialists have been voting for the progressive/socialist candidates (and have for a while) while the moderates and conservatives have often been voting for the Dems, and the fascists and reactionaries have been voting for the Republicans.

Like… this man has never enjoyed my vote. I campaigned for his primary opponent last year. What do you mean ‘splitting’ when he never received that vote?

There are so many races where the third party candidate— usually Green or Independent (former Dem)— gets more votes than the Republican. Explain to me how a Republican with no more than *checks notes* 15% of the vote is going to win in those districts? They never even get enough to meet the threshold % of votes to hold office. If a 3rd party is “splitting votes” as you claim, that isn’t paving the way for the “other party” to win, its paving the way for (drumroll) *none* of the candidates to meet the first-past-the-post threshold.

This fear of not voting for the incumbents is… strange. You’re allowed to change your mind and threaten them with your vote and campaign against them. In fact, you should be. Be more politically active. Openly criticize your elected officials. Be loud. Be demanding. Campaign. Run. Fuck, upwards of 70% of elections go uncontested.

This fear lacks an on-the-ground nuance of how our political system is changing.

The republicans are an increasingly niche (and aging) authoritarian-right party desperately trying to hold on to relevancy and power through undemocratic means.

The democrats have far too large a coalition as they cover everyone from right to left, which have wildly different demands, desires, values, and ideologies, resulting in a party that most often seems spineless at worse and anemic at best.

Everyone left of center has been left without the same broad, mainstream representation that the right of the political spectrum has in the US.

There very well may come a time when the Republican Party fades into obscurity (if they don’t seize power via undemocratic means), the Democratic Party splinters (with conservatives following the Biden ideology), and a new progressive movement emerges.

This fear is also based on the idea every district is competitive up and down the ballot. Most races are not competitive. Keep in mind that 70% statistic. Also keep in mind that in 2020, 373 of the 394 House members who ran for reelection won (that’s 95%). Your fear of not voting for or of campaigning against an incumbent is based on the assumption that every district will flip Dem to Repub; that this is an either/or decision and a black-n-white system. Your assumption ignores gerrymandering, it ignores the incumbent advantage, it ignores that 70% stat, and it ignores how the second most competitive party in “partisan” districts— specifically, in smaller districts and local elections— is often a 3rd party. In those “stronghold” areas, the only competition (and thus the element keeping democracy alive in that race) is often an independent or 3rd party candidate. The “other party” (Dem or Repub) won’t even acquire enough votes to meet the threshold to take office.

Statistically, you aren’t talking to someone in a competitive district. Like… a grand total of 99 house seats (22%) were competitive in 2022.

But— shit— let’s say that a district hypothetically elects a 3rd party candidate successfully. I want you to really, critically think about their platform. I want you to think about the active 3rd parties. There are— like— 2x the number of left-wing 3rd parties as right-wing. Ask yourself: would a right-wing party truly win in a “blue stronghold”? And do you really think a fucking socialist or a green or a progressive is a Republican ally? No, you don’t. Yet here you are on your high horse telling predominately black and brown socialists that they’re signing their own death certificates by voting for an independent for Sheriff instead of the only other choice they have: some crusty Republican with a thin blue line flag and the tag “All Lives Matter” on his campaign Facebook page.

Your fear of 3rd parties is based on propaganda and the fact that, since you were a child, everyone told you that voting 3rd is acquiescence because they never have a chance at legitimacy. And I want you to critically ask yourself: how in the hell did the Democratic and Republican Party emerge in the first place? Thin air? Magic? Why aren’t we still electing Federalists and Whigs?

#So fucking tired of seeing this #‘This is a psyop’ but it’s literally just a black woman concerned that the Dems are too pro-police